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#facial details. so ive been trying to work a lot on it
amasdoodles · 2 months
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a collection of doodles done recently, refs used
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cripplecharacters · 1 month
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so, the posts on this blog about facial difference inspired me to make an oc with facial difference- specifically strabismus and a port wine stain. she's pretty much become one of my favourite characters to draw and develop, ive taken care to make sure she doesn't fall into shitty tropes. however, i have had one problem- in the world she lives in, rebels like her cover their face most of the time. ive been really struggling on how to design her mask/covering in a way that doesn't feel shitty, and doesn't feel like it's trying to cover her facial difference. and i know that technically it's not as bad if she's not the only character who wears a mask, but i still don't wanna push it, if you know what i mean? so it would be awesome if you could give suggestions on how i could handle her mask. here's a reference of her for. reference, and some ideas ive had for masks. thank you for taking the time, and for this blog in general!
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[Image description: Traditional drawing of a light-skinned girl with pink straight hair, smiling. She has a large port-wine stain on the left side of her face, and her right eye goes inward. Around her are three headshot sketches;
first shows her in a bandana that goes over her nose with "bandana doesn't obscure FD but hides smile + necklace" written above, second shows a half-mask that covers only the right side of her face, with "early concept, feels tacky, shows port-wine stain but not strabismus :(", third shows a domino mask, with "domino mask, do I even have to explain? No-go" next to it. End image description.]
Hi!
I think that something close to the second one would actually be kinda fun (no irony or sarcasm). If we're talking about a story where everyone wears a mask, having the character with FD wear one that covers everything except for the FD is actually subversive! I never thought I would say that, but it does feel like it is.
Not sure how strict of a design should it be, but a diagonal - her bottom right to her top left - mask would be nice!
I tried to write down a detailed description of what I mean but it was coming out rather overcomplicated, so I hope you're okay with me doing a few demonstrative sketches; a diagonal and rather-silly option, an idea for the bandana with a drawn smile and the kind of tie that would show her necklace, and an idea for the half-mask but with an eye with strabismus painted on the mask.
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So here are the suggestions! I haven't drawn in a while so my skills are kinda rusty, but I hope it conveys the concept! My personal favorite would be the first one - I know it barely counts as a mask but then again, in comics it's common that someone is unrecognizable when they wear a pair of glasses, so maybe it's not as farfetched haha.
The second one would be totally fine by my standards, but I'm assuming that her necklace has some kind of significance in the story, so maybe she could cross it at the back and tie it in the front instead for it to be more visible (or wear the necklace over it even?).
I think that doing something like on the third drawing above would be okay if there are also a lot of moments where her actual strabismus is shown. In general, I think that the idea of a character with a facial difference wearing a mask just to paint it on the mask is kinda silly, and I feel like it would fit her character. But for something like that to work, she would need to have the mask off often. If you choose to do that, I suggest your first time showing her to the viewer is with her mask off, both for the usual reasons I mentioned before but also because strabismus is often used as a gag in art. For me, seeing a character wear that kind of mask with no context would be kind of eye-rolling - but seeing a character with a crossed eye put on a mask with the same exact kind of eye, go and join their friends at doing rebel things? That's actually something new!
I enjoy that your character seems to be on the rather joyful and happy side, I like that :-) (smile emoji)
I hope this helps!
mod Sasza
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ladystoneboobs · 7 months
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i present: small and non-verbal but very funny star wars moments:
ep. V: the empire strikes back--the millenium falcon achieves hyperspeed again, despite the imperials' best plans to the contrary. admiral piett and his men are terrified of vader's reaction, all trying to stay out of his path. but he's still too busy brooding on his loss of luke to even force-choke anyone. that's how thrown off he was by his newly-mutilated son running away from him!
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the sole exception to this collective terror being this guy, so intent on his own important work, that he doesn't even notice his scary boss until darth vader has walked right past him.
ep. III: revenge of the sith--padme's droids somehow getting her unconscious body back on her ship.
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in the novelisation, r2-d2 just drags her up the ramp with his gadgetry, but in the script it's c-3po who carried her up bridal style. which would be impossible to film when 3po could barely manage to move around under his own weight. what makes it really funny for me is that there was no need for any of this. why not just have obi-wan pick her up as he's hurrying outta there after failing to kill her husband? i mean, it's surely not good to be lying out in the open on a volcanic world with poisonous gases, but it wouldn't be good for obi-wan running around out there either, and this lady was about to have broken heart as her only known cause of death. when has science ever held back star wars? and i can't imagine that being dragged by wires from artoo or dropped every few steps by threepio could've been too good for her body either. just makes for an absurd little (offscreen) background detail amid the tragedy of the end of padme's life, imho.
ep. IV: a new hope--obi-wan vanishing into thin air when struck down and vader's (very understandable) bafflement afterward.
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by this point in the second screencap, luke is shooting at him in retaliation and the stormtroopers are all shooting back at luke, but anakin is still dealing with this unprecendented vanishing and busy searching for any corporeal remains of obi-wan kenobi with his boot. "where did you go, my old master? how could this happen? i wasn't done fighting with you yet."
ep. V: the empire strikes back--vader inviting lando calrissian, chewbacca, han solo, and princess leia to share a meal with him and boba fett, before taking chewie, han, and leia prisoner and torturing han.
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i think a lot of people must assume there was no actual meal, but it's not like vader had to go to all that trouble in the first place of setting out an entire banquet table with proper containers and utensils. just because that was lando's pretext to bring them to vader does not necessitate actually having a table set. darth vader could have had them led into any other room with boba fett and stormtroopers waiting to just arrest them right away. instead, as we can see in the second screencap, (over lando's shoulder and leia's bun), vader did sit down at the head of the table, waiting for his prey to join him. and i swear, in one of the earlier drafts of empire's screenplay there is actually a scene showing their awkward meal together. or rather, han and leia being served food and drinks while darth vader just sits there, watching evilly, explaining his great villainous plan to use them to trap luke. it's like dr. evil making austin and vanessa sit down at his table in the first austin powers movie. darth vader really did always live for drama
ep. VI: return of the jedi--leia telling han that she loves luke, but not that way. he's her brother, silly! as if this is something they all knew all along, with zero follow-up explanation. you can just see han wordlessly processing this bombshell of brand new information through his facial expressions alone. (this lasts so long that i wouldn't even count it were it not likely overshadowed by everything else in the ending of rotj.)
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wh-what did you say? your brother? since when?
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wait-wait-wait. i've seen you mouth kissing luke right in front of me before. i'm so confused now.
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just what kind of weirdo family have i gotten myself mixed up with here?
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oh, well, she's only kissing me now. that's good enough, i guess. maybe?
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hey, as long as you do love me and luke in different ways ...
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i don't know much about families, but i've heard they all have their weird traditions. so who am i to judge you, babe? as long as we're together now, that's all that matters.
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tpher · 5 months
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how do you make your oc screencap edits?? i also have a td oc and i dont really know where to start 😭
ok so!!! i use firealpaca which is just my usual drawing program. so i'll keep using it as a reference for my steps but of course im sure whatever similar program u use should have similar features
i'll be long winded for funsies as usual 💕
FINDING YOUR SCREENSHOTS
the key to decent td edits is to flat out trace screenshots whenever possible. stock pics will do, but of course itll be a lot more fun and less obvious if u use a screenshot from the show and put it into your new context
in terms of making your ocs, you will likely have to do what someone once called "frankensteining" your pics. this is where you use pics of other characters for their specific features and put them together since your oc doesnt have official screenshots to trace. this also absolutely comes in handy w canon characters! maybe you have a pose but u need them to be sitting. so try to stitch together two different pics to get what u need
it will look very scary but just trust the process. here is a random example i made using a dawn screenshot (where i removed the background), gwens eyes and eyebrows, and kittys hair
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the sketching part is semi-optional. if you think you can freehand the lineart then go ahead but i assume your oc wont be a complete copy of something found in canon and therefore you will have to draw the newer/different features (such as the hair or the outfit) at least a little bit. and sometimes when i frankenstein the pics, my brain gets all overwhelmed so sketching makes me feel better jfbdjdnd
(in terms of my own oc, i screwed myself over bc his body type is so unique i gotta freehand it like all the time 😭
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you can see i traced his head from his render (ALWAYS DO THIS BTW!!! TRACE CONSTANTLY), but then the body was freehanded using a canon pic as reference because tracing the pic wouldve been inaccurate)
THE LINEART
yes the iconic td thick, sharp, flat lineart. i achieve this by using a normal pen tool, turning off the pen pressure, and then turning up my pen stability to 40-60 (very high). you could use a curve tool if that works for you! but i would suggest against that for ALL of it bc the tool just wont respond well to rly drastic curves and such
the pen size varies on the pic. if the characters are close-up, itll likely be a bigger one. and then the characters' little details and facial features are usually a slightly but definitely noticeable smaller size. for the most part, ive had the bigger pen size at 13 while the details are around 9. or big size 10 and smaller size 7.
heres my technique:
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as u can see, all of my lines go a bit too far. this is so that when im done drawing them, i can go back in and slowly erase where they meet and get them all sharp and pointy. this is just how i personally do it lmao. when it comes to facial features and other stuff that doesnt connect to anything, just get a close look at your reference to see how thick or how thin the edges get and do ur best to erase the edges to the point where they should be
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THE COLORING
not much to it! the bucket tool is the best way to go. again just get a good look at your references just in case any parts have the lineart also colored in
THE BACKGROUND
you can find some generic td background pics on google or u could get them from the show and try to erase any character in the way lmao. if ur recreating something like, say, a dunc/ney scene w a different ship, then its very tedious but youll have to do your best to erase the canon characters and piece the background back together.
i like using the smudge tool a lot for this!!! just kinda pulling whats already there towards the characters. to save time, put your drawing visible on a top layer as you do this so that you dont have to edit the ENTIRE background, just what you need
THE RENDERING
ok so heres a big one imo. after youre done, youre gonna have to fuck up the quality at least a little. well not that u HAVE to but like..... to match the standard quality of a td screenshot? ive never seen a td screenshot in perfect hd quality outside of stock art. so u could blur ur drawing just a little bit. maybe add in the teeniest bit of chromatic aberration (just set it to 1 or -1). not ALL of them together but u do whatever u gotta do
my personal favorite is blurring just a little and then saving it as a jpeg (around 65-80%) so that its pretty crunchy and looks all the more real
obviously not a NECESSARY step but just something to point out. especially if ur background isnt the best quality so the characters have to match it
this one from yesterday i didnt even redraw topher bc i was lazy and he looks fine enough. i just put danny onto the pic to cover the other character. so i blurred danny a little bit and then saved it in a pretty low quality so that they match one another. look at those pixels. that crunch.
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SO THE TLDR IS just trace and copy your references as close as possible. if you cant find a reference for your character, try finding another character w something close enough
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forecast0ctopus · 1 year
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hi there, I love your art! if you have time to answer, I was wondering if you have any tips or recommendations for drawing in a more expressive or cartoony style? I've been drawing for years but I always get caught up in the weeds and end up adding way too many details that don't necessarily look bad, but are too stiff and over-detailed. I really admire the way you capture so much in such clean lines, if you have any thoughts or advice I would love to hear them - thanks for sharing your art, have a great day!
ah thanks so much, i really appreciate it!! i totally get where youre coming from tho, i really tend to get caught up in the small things too (the amount of sketch layers i have on finished things is stupid lmao). anyways yes theres a few things i do to help myself out of that pattern!! im not all that great at putting things into words but hopefully the pictures help haha putting it under the cut because it'll probably end up long sorry
i cant speak for everybody but this is what i do! heres how i tend to approach my initial sketches:
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i like to keep it minimal here so i can focus on the pose over everything else, i try to do it in one pass and not worry about the anatomy. usually i do a few of these kind of sketches before i figure out something i like. also something ive found recently is that, for me, zooming in and doing these sketches really tiny helps because i dont have the space to add in detail. i do this a lot when i thumbnail a sequence to storyboard (usually on paper tho) and it helps me focus on the idea over the drawing
after that i like to focus on shapes!
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if theyre a character with loose fitting clothes i usually won't sketch out much anatomy and just get into the shapes of the clothes bc then i dont get too particular with proportions and all. im gonna state here that this is not an excuse to not study anatomy tho and the reason that this works out for me is because i have studied it haha
getting into details of things, i kind of try to walk the line between too little and too much? like with clothes the details i like to get are wrinkles at bent joints and obvious seams. with wrinkles i try to only do one, maybe two, because it can get excessive fast.
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seams are really good for establishing the direction things are facing, like to read volume in 3D space. the ones ill pretty much always include (unless theyre not present in the clothing worn) are shoulder seams and pants seams. in my experience shoulder seams are great at telling the fit of a shirt without a ton of detail!
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lmao heres a collage of expressions for an example. as far as faces go i like to exaggerate mouths and eyebrows a lot lmao its kind of hard for me to put into words my process here. i really like dot eyes bc i feel like i can do a lot with em in combination with lines. tho i dont usually use em on finished artwork. eyebrows and mouth are primarily what i use to establish a facial expression, though sometimes ill throw in a scrunched nose if the expression calls for it.
the whole "clean lines" bit really does help with making sure things dont look too cluttered, and the way to approach that for me is doing your line in just one stroke (maybe two if u want it darker but thats besides the point lmao) but yeah drawing from your shoulder, not having a hairy line, etc really helps not clutter your drawing anyways i think thats about it for expressiveness and clean lines idk if youve got anything more to ask ill answer to the best of my ability
TL;DR i try to focus on shapes and pose, and putting in just enough details to make action/expression read well
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plumbus-central · 11 months
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How did you develop your art style? Like how did you find your own voice in your art?
Oh what an interesting question, I never expected to asked abt my art!
Honestly i took a while to think abt this question, and I think a lot i've done about developing my own art style came from seeing things i liked in other people's art and copying it lol.
For instance when i was in the [REDACTED] fandom when i was a young teen there was a very popular artist who used gradients in their work to add depth and color and i liked it a lot, so i started doing it in my work too.
A few years ago i started following an artist and really liked their work bc they had such a strong grasp of color, shape, gesture, and line. And they used these strong, thick lines to fill out the form of their work, but i noticed that the lines often didn't touch and that it didn't matter bc you could still understand and make out the form of whatever they drew just fine. So i decided to stop worrying abt MY lines touching either lol. which is how i ended up with those sort of ghost constructions of figures and shapes i do sometimes.
I can vividly remember seeing a comic on tumblr ONCE where i saw a character have just a line for a mouth that went off their face and i just stared at that panel for a while trying to figure out why i liked it so much lol until i realized it was their expression that i liked. So i kept that in my head, and a few years later i realized that i had started using it in my art too.
Another aspect that has influenced my art is exploring other media and being challenged by my own interests. Like when i was a teen i was very into steven universe and my own ocs. which was fine but didn't challenge me too much artistically. Then in college i got into bojack horseman, and specifically my favorite character was herb kazzaz, a short, fat man with a beard. Completely out of my comfort zone to draw, but i wanted to draw him so bad! so i figured it out!
(some of u might actually be familiar w/ my boajck horseman sideblog @hambone-fakenameington , it hasnt been updated in a while cause im on that rick and morty shit right now lol). But now i have to skills to draw these things by way of my interests in the character.
My fixation with rick and morty was actually so strong at first that i was drawing like crazy, which eventually taught me to focus on and hone my skills with gesture, thumbnailing, and composition bc i wanted to draw so many ideas at once that i couldn't spend too long on each one. (and it also gave me lots of practice). Thanks to my interest in R&M ive also developed skills in drawing very skinny bodies lol, but also on pushing expressions and gestures to extremes that i never used to!
Hell even just trying to figure out how to take features and details from characters in something and translate them into YOUR style can be a big learning and growing experience. (u can see in my old art it took me a while to get rick to look right)
So i guess the overall is that seeking out and consuming media is always important bc you can take a lot of inspiration from something without even realizing it. (honestly if ur feeling stagnant in ur art watching/reading something new can be a good way to jog ur brain). And taking a good look at the art you enjoy and trying to figure out WHY u like it, and what elements are stick out to u. Then seeing if you can bring those elements into ur own art and see if it's successful to u to explore it.
as far as voice goes um.... i guess what's become important to me is that u gotta know when to cut corners lol. like a hand doesn't ALWAYS need to be perfectly formed, like it can be a squiggle and it might even look better for it. sometimes loose and sloppy looks good for what ur doing and sometimes heavily defined and carefully lined work is necessary but i gotta remember that the clean art is built on the back of the sloppy studies. and stray lines, warped perspective, and unaligned facial elements can give a lot of character to a work that might otherwise seem bland and stiff.
thank you so much for the question it was fun to take a look at my work and reflect on how i got to what i have as a style now! R&M has honestly done A TON for my art style and drawing abilities that i didn't realize till now.
Also worth mentioning bc i forget how much of my life i share w/ you guys but i also have BFA in Illustration with a focus in Animation Arts and Sequential Art.
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smileymoth · 3 months
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7, 8, 14
7. Who are some artists that have inspired you? This isn't a difficult question but it's hard to like... describe why someone inspires me. I think the 1 artist that has sort of guided me to find my art style is definitely godlyDescentUFO they mostly post on deviantart/twt of which i don't really use anymore. I still think about their art a lot, and often. The colour palettes they use and the composition and body language of the characters drawn... It's just special to me. I want to replicate it. One day. Again I feel like Ive been too sucked into fandom these past few years to really do what i want to but I'll... I'll explain that later .But yeah they've been my favourite artist ever since I found them. I feel like if you just go thru their gallery you can tell why I like them
Then there's clickbaitcowboy . He's on tumblr go give them a follow. he makes godly oc illustrations and his painting skills are so... so so so so AAHHH. Im in love fr I can't explain it. The shading makes me go insane and the way he draws out anatomy and muscles and fat and just bodies in general... god
supppe, another person who is on tumblr whose colour paletes bring me joy. He makes comics and his art style is super pleasing to the eye
And from current fandom I think everyone can agree that panidanya and wszczebrzyszynie are incredible artists . Panidanyas anatomy and painting skills kill me every time and wszczebrzyszynie has this really nostalgic(?) art style that my heart can get behind. It creates art with such passion and love, you know, you can't deny that. if you look at its art you just know
Other than that the main inspiration i guess comes from my friends, from my mutuals' art. It doesn't have to be something big. It can be as simple as a small detail in someones clothing or the facial expressions. God this reminds me I miss my friends art. Evan you need to make more art I miss you
8. How would you describe your art style?
Matured deviantart emo semirealism. I dont think semi realism really fits my style bc it still feels too cartoony to me. I dont think my art style is really all that well developed idk it lacks identity to me but Im also hyper critical of my art
14. Do you prefer to make fan content or original content? This is a tricky goddamn question I thought about this for like 5 minutes and now Im even more confused. I am an oc artist first. I don't like "original" art in the sense of those paintings that just exist in a vacuum with no character stories behind them. I want something you can follow, you know. I want there to be some form of a story. which i guess is my downfall sometimes. When i draw fandom art i feel like they're also my ocs. esp bc its... its mcyt... You kind of have to make it into your oc because you have 16x16 pixel canvas and someones 2010 kakashi skin to work with.
On the other hand, bc i'm an oc artist, Im making 'fan content' of my ocs. Technically. Do yuo follow. So me drawing my babyboy Daniel 400+ times in a decade is kind of like fan content but Im the only fan... So whats original content and whats fan content.
I do feel like being so intertwined in fandom content may have hindered my art development a little bit, since I completely stopped drawing my ocs for a little while. I didn't get to explore their lives through art as much as I would've wanted to. I haven't been drawing as many backgrounds because I do enjoy mostly drawing interiors and there's not much interiors to talk about when it comes to mcyt... And ive also just been lacking motivation for it.
All in all i think i enjoy "original" art more, because it gives me more, it gives more to my heart. It's not that i don't enjoy drawing mcyt, but I think I should maybe try to draw mcyt in a more personal? matter? Without too much fandomification? I want to make more art that has "meaning" per say, with backgrounds, a story behind them. (this is just for me and what i want to get out of art, this doesn't apply to anyone else. it's such a slippery slope bc i know saying these things may feel hurtful to others but i am only talking about myself.... okay T_T) I dont know if any of this makes sense. I'm always lost in my direction with art and going to art school didn't make it any better <3
I do think that because I've been going thru a lot of personal warfare in the past 3 years, fandom HAS helped me in the sense that it helps me with creativity, since i have been severely lacking in creative thinking, I just struggle with it nowadays, so if I can draw ethubs making out under a tree bc they did so in episode 402 out of season 194 then so be it, at least it'll help me create
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thelostmoongazer · 4 years
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sooooo this is an au thats been in the works for a few weeks now! Ive been calling it the ForgetMeNot AU but @spudinacup​ has been calling them the Dust Bunnies and i just.... lets just say its an alternative name 
to put this au in the briefest description, this is a direct spin-off of the GONE WRONG AU (thank you spud for enabling me) where a divergence in events leads to Steven's body getting cremated and his ashes being spread over the hill where Steven died/where the injector landed, for ceremonial purposes. This au also incorporates a theory/au that @faranae​ has that involves the injector originally being used to create new gems/spinels. With this in mind, cremation ashes are commonly used to create diamonds to put in jewelry as memorabilia. So, with those two concepts in mind... i’m sure you can see where im going with this
(This au is based entirely around the events that will happen in the GW AU, events that I am in no way privy to how they occur so i’m just here for the ride, folks)
READ UNDER THE CUT FOR MORE DETAILED CHARACTER DESCRIPTIONS AND NOTES 
•Cloud•
   Pronouns: They/them (occasional he???)
   Age: Last to emerge
   Flaw: Twinning wisps (in layman’s terms, when too many outside elements interfere and stunt the growth of the diamond) (design more heavily based on this) 
   Symptoms: light projection is underdeveloped. Black misshapen “skin” is warped over crystalline “nursery clusters”. (I headcanon that in the early stages of gem growth, their entire form is nothing more than a small, light projection cluster of the gem their made of, but then this condenses into one spot, the gem, thus leaving behind the refined light projection and hardening the gem.) The underdeveloped skin is black/reddish because of the presence of other elements, receding it’s formation.
   Personality: All three are curious about the world, sure, but only Cloud is as forward with their intrigue. They have the mentality of “This interests me, I am going to learn more.” Which often leads them to invading boundaries and personal bubbles.    They are the most likely out of the three to ask questions and strike up conversation (that is, at least, when they learn English. Even though I can still see them trying to anyway even with broken English lol) making them very charismatic and friendly. This, in turn, makes Cloud act as the three’s door to learning more about this new world they’ve found themselves in.
   Other Notes:    - Representation of Pink Diamond. Poofy pants, Leotard over pants, Flats. Their Personality also reflects this, mimicking Pink Diamonds childlike curiosity and hunger for knowledge about life on earth.    - Meant to mimic Steven’s friendly nature.
•Sky•
   Pronouns: She/He/They
   Age: second to emerge
   Flaw: Clouding
   Symptoms: Pigment discoloration around eyes paired with iris colomba (poor vision)
   Personality: Sky is the grounding force of the group, they are the one to bring them back down to earth and be the calm when either of them go into their own heads too much. They are also fairly curious about the world but isn’t as direct about it, mostly preferring to observe from afar unless encouraged (or enabled) by the others (*coughcough* cloud *coughcough*) this isn’t to be confused with skittish, though. If sky were to be approached by someone unknown they wouldn’t run away, they’d most likely stay where they are and give you a funny look.    Sky will often need encouragement, direct or indirect, from the other two to make their own willing decisions, and will often parrot cloud or slug. Sky will often act as their dictionary or mental catalogue. If one of them forgets the word to something it’s likely sky will be the one to remember it.
   Other Notes:    -Representation of Rose Quartz. Shawl layer in the shape of RQ’s dress, loose ringlets, bare feet. Their personality reflects Rose Quartz’s mature and nurturing energy with the deep love for all those they hold dear.     - Meant to mimic Steven’s caring spirit    -due to iris colomba, her vision is very poor. But a symptom of iris colomba is the presence of floater spots in ones vision which, in children, can lead to a more developed use for peripheral vision. This is the case for Sky.
•Slug•
   Pronouns: He/They
   Age: First to emerge
   Flaw: Black Inclusions (bits of spinel?)
   Symptoms: Black splotches all over body, mental conflict (short temper, mild co-dependency)
   Personality: Being the first to emerge, Slug takes on the role of protector. This makes him very defensive and slightly possessive of the other sibling. He is the most antisocial of the group but can be easily swayed into any activity by the other two, especially when it comes to affection. He typically comes off as crass and rude to strangers (or anyone who isn’t sky or cloud), but if his trust is earned (with a lot of effort) he will show it rather than say it. Slug is the most visually observant and spatially aware out of the two and acts as their sharper set of eyes (this also going hand in hand with their role as protector).
   Other Notes:    - Representation of Steven. Jacket, (comparatively) shorter curly hair, sandals.    His personality reflects Stevens protective nature (and temper) and desire to help. Wanting nothing more than to be useful to those he cares about most.    - Meant to mimic Steven’s will to fight
•Overall Notes•
   • These gems emerge about 3-4 or so months after the current events of GONE WRONG (THIS IS LIKELY TO CHANGE) 
  • Each gems deformities/premature emergence all make these gems extremely brittle compared to a normal perfect cut diamond (or even a regular gem for that matter)
  • 3 gems instead of one was the fact that a pink diamond, in essence, is practically identical to a white diamond, as far as whats in it’s chemical compound to effect it’s color. With this in mind, its been explained before that White Diamond carries the essence of the entire spectrum. If this is true, then why wouldn’t a pink diamond if they’re practically identical? Therefore, the result of adding those residual properties of a pink diamond from within the ashes, would produce the “purest” forms of the spectrum. White, yellow, and blue. All of them tinted slightly with an ashy pinkish hue.
   • Many things were factors in their premature growth, but a main factor is the amount of injector fluid that was provided in the growing process. When spinel first lands the injector, its very apparent that there is plenty of fluid injected into the hill right upon impact. But in this circumstance, after the current events in Gone Wrong, the injector goes idle (or is possibly removed and relocated by/to Little Homeworld but that is completely up in the air and reliant on future events in GW.) and what little fluid was left behind by the injector was what was used to grow the three gems 
   • Currently, their vocabulary is very limited. They will normally speak in 1-3 word sentences unless they are parroting. Although, given that they are technically elite gem, albeit deformed, they do have the programming for an advanced ease of grasp on language. 
   • Because of their human influence, they have taken on specific traits of Steven. Yes, different physical aspects (facial features, body type, clothing, etc.) but they also gained instincts from Steven. Not to be confused with memories, but rather impressions of specific muscle memory.     Although they don’t need to, they will sometimes desire sleep or food, often unknowingly acting on human instincts. They will even find themselves drawn to specific things/places/people, finding them familiar or warming up to this thing/place/person with ease. (e.g. feeling familial attachment to Pink!Steven not long after first contact with him, with the exception of Slug (lol))     This can include, but is not limited to, other absent minded behaviors; such  as, inflections in speech, subtle ticks (i.e. humming, tapping feet, idle movements), specific hand gestures, ect.
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cornappreciation · 3 years
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It's been a while. Episode 40 discussion post below! Spoilers, obviously.
hi! wow! its been a while! sorry about that, brainrot said i have to think about nothing but warrior cats for like six months straight so ive been busy with that. but im back, hopefully? not sure if anyone really recognizes my specifically (or if they ever did), but anyways. since i didnt make an analysis post for the past,,, two (?) episodes, some of my cited evidence will just be "trust me bro" as i dont have notes to look back on, only my own memory. now! episode 40!
this episode was very corn-heavy, so that's gonna be the focal point of this post. ok, time for a quick recap. ive already established in my previous episode analysis / theory posts that corn is almost definitely been *replaced* by xolotl, not possessed or altered. its also likely the beast in the cave near metztli is quetzalcoatl (though this could be a manifestation of xolotl as well), and xolotl is trying to rid of him (this is why im working on the assumption is it quetzalcoatl and not xolotl in the reflections, however this could be some amalgamate of the two "getting rid" of xolotl….. who knows!). im going against my previous theories here! i said in a previous post the shadowy figures were likely xolotl, but im leaning towards corn here in the replacement theory, ill detail why later in this post. he also said at some point in episode 40 that he "got rid of his negative traits" (paraphrasing) which could be a reference ot getting rid of his twin. As for the evidence for replacing rather than possession: mind the difference in hairstyle in his human form, difference in facial markings, and his lack of transformation back into nagual form (likely because it would be markedly different. it could be that xolotls nagual form is reminiscent on corn's dream self with the face covered in hands? yall know what im talking about, ill cite the episode later. but this is unrelated).
All of this happened directly after he failed to shoot the mercy bow. Not sure if the mercy bow or the town is relevant here, but i figured its worth bringing up. This scene in episode 35 is the last we see of regular corn. He has been in human form since this point. He seemed to panic while holding the bow, which could be a mark of his personality in general, *or* something to do with being in metztli, bringing us back to the monster in the cave the citizens of metztli keep at bay with blood. This beast is likely xolotl (although as ive outlined above this could be an incorrect assessment) when the gang first enters the town, and has perhaps "switched places" with corn, leaving quetzalcoatl trapped in xolotl's reflection. This ties back to episode 40 itself, with xolotl (im going to be referring to the impostor as xolotl from now on, its easier for me) requesting that the nurses remove the mirror from his room and give him a wooden spoon rather than a metal one (that could give off his reflection). I'm not sure what this means for corn himself, perhaps xolotl just doesn't want to look at and be reminded of him, or this could be a strategy for getting rid of him? if anyone has any ideas feel free to tell me lol. Not super clear here. Maybe it can be explained by the mythos?
back! to! the! mercy! bow! which isnt really relevant to episode 40. most of this post isnt relevant to episode 40! because i think this episode mostly served to build tension and let us get to know xolotl a little better. but why not give myself a refresher and go back into some of my old stuff? just to get the ball rolling again. ive said in previous posts that i thought the reason the quetzalcoatl and xolotl,,, "thing" happened was because of the mercy bow presumably being destroyed or lost during the eruption of the red tezcatlipoca, since it isnt seen on screen after this happens. im going to tentatively retract this! i dont think its right (though it IS still a possibility….. maybe xolotl was able to take over bc corn disappeared WITH the bow??? but im not sure if the fact he was never able to use the bow disproves this……. hm.) we know *corn* is the proper wielder of it, yes, but i honestly think its more to do with the spooky cave than the bow (something i overlooked previously). its possible the bow being destroyed allowed xolotl to take over? honestly kind of stumped on xolotls method here. its also possible that my replacement theory is totally off mark and theres something im missing!
heres a timeline rq, starting with the gang entering metztli. corn and others enter metztli. they make their way to the temple with the mercy bow. corn attempted to use it, but is scared off by something or otherwise flys away for an unknown reason. this is the last we see on him. he appears only in human form from here on, with his altered facial markings and hairstyle a mark of him being changed. my theory explains this as xolotl pretending to be quetzalcoatl, from some point after corn left the temple and the red eruption. xolotl is likely the creature in the spooky cave the citizens of metztli keep at bay with blood. somehow, xolotl trapped corn in his place (his reflection), while he roams free, pretending to be corn. he avoids reflections of himself (as a shadowy figure is seen on them. This figure is likely corn. Others can see this reflection, as we see a guy at Blackwell drop his spoon after noticing it), and is "maliciously compliant" (uncooperative) with authority. It's likely he purposefully "got rid" of corn, as he says in episode 40 that he got rid of his "negative qualities". spooky! but this episode did not bring a lot of answers. great way to build up tension though! loved the constantly clock ticking as a buildup. cant wait for the next ep :)
apologies if anything ive stated has already been speculated on or confirmed otherwise ! like i said, i havent been active in a while (i even stopped using my main blog, so i dont use tumblr too often), so for all i know i could be the only person left in the no evil fandom on tumblr. feel free to add onto this or correct me or anything ive gotten wrong! ive missed interacting with yall on these theory posts :) might add on more later if i have any revelations.
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wing-ed-thing · 3 years
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Cabaret (Might Guy x Reader, Chapter III)
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Chapter I Chapter II Chapter III Chapter IV Chapter V Chapter VI Chapter VII Chapter VIIIChapter IX Chapter X Chapter XI 
Guy woke you from dreamless sleep in the middle of the night. He laid a gentle hand on your shoulder. It was time for your watch. You bolted up at the touch, propping yourself on your left palm. The kunai from under your pseudo-pillow felt heavy in your grip against his neck. Guy had kept the fire kindled, but just barely. The dim glow outlined his face as he lingered kneeling over you. You relaxed, recognizing him after a few blinks.  He looked exhausted, but gazed upon you with concerned eyes. He recoiled his touch softly. You put your kunai down. Wordlessly, Guy settled into his makeshift cot.
You stretched, sitting up against a large fallen branch. The heat from the little flares warmed your cheeks. You threw a small piece of wood on the embers, watching as the tiny flames licked the offering. The light burned just bright enough to see your surroundings, but not enough to give you away to any that may be lurking in the woods. You breathed deeply and closed your eyes to focus. No other chakra signatures anywhere around.
Guy tapped out quickly, curled up in his blanket to your left. He gave out a light snore. He must’ve been a lot more tired than he let on to you before. Raven black strands slipped from his forehead, falling across his eyes. You glanced around. You were alone. Gingerly, you reached over and tucked the stray strands back, but quickly recoiled as a small shock pinched your nerves. You shifted back against the log.
Much like the night before, you found yourself thumbing through the case file once more. Bits of light fluttered on the page. You ran a finger over your new name, new identity. The name of the club where you were to become the equivalent of a cabaret girl, a hostess. The file felt thin and light in your hand. The Leaf did not know if the plot by the Sound existed, let alone it’s details. You rolled the edge of the paper in your fingers. The layout of the city printed on the page wrinkled at the border. You have long since memorized the image. You tossed the pages into the fire. You wouldn’t be needing it anymore.
At the rate you and Guy were going at, you’d arrive later today. You took a few items out of your pack and began work on your face. As tedious and expensive as it was to do missions like this, it was the only way for an undercover mission. Any ninja could use a transformation jutsu, but any team with a half-skilled sensory ninja could sense a small, yet continuous, flow of it from a mile away if they really tried. You ran a brush down your cheekbone, the tinted light posed a challenge, but not one you hadn’t overcome before. You tried not to grin as you thought about what new products you could buy with your reimbursement ryō. While you got the process down to a science, it still took focus.
In time, you witnessed dawn impose itself on the world. Little by little, you observed the orchestra of the forest. As the sun began to rise, you could hear birds, see them fly overhead as they began their day. Small rodents rustled in the treetops. For a while, the forest took on a teal blue tint, but the hue changed as the sun rose. Beams of sunlight trickled through the trees. The saturation became green and gold. The fresh, crisp air pleasantly shocked your lungs. The daylight shown on your sleeping partner’s relaxed features.
You shifted and shadow once again enveloped his figure.
Guy began to stir by the time you were finished. As you were packing your equipment back up, his eyes suddenly shot open. He sat up in his make-shift cot.
“Alright,” he stated, stretching his arms over his head, “Breaktime’s over.”
He turned to you. He arched his eyebrows and assumed a semi-defensive posture. Guy’s brows sewed together in confusion. You rolled your eyes, sighing.
“It’s me, genius.”
“Riiiight, right.” Guy took in your new features. He had heard about your abilities, but hadn’t had a chance to see them up close. He tilted his head. If Guy hadn’t known you, you could have easily been a different person. He mentally bisected you. Closing one eye and squinting the other, he raised his hand to block his vision to your face. Same clothes. Same body language. Same figure. Guy moved his hand. Different hair. Different facial structure. How did you pull that off?
“Are you going to stop staring?” You questioned, not looking at Guy, “It’s unprofessional and if you’re up then we should really head out.”
Guy nodded, gathering both of your things together. You dispersed all evidence of the camp and dismantled the protective jutsus. Not long after, the two of you once again vanished into the trees, not a trace left behind.
There were about 15 more hours to go. This, of course, did not include the extra time it would take as you crossed the border to the Country of Rice. Naturally, “civilians” like yourselves don’t have chakra control so for a portion of the trip you will be walking in case you were unlucky enough to get stopped by Sound patrol. Every few minutes, you scanned ahead for any chakra signatures. You were getting lucky today. Unlike the day before, you found little trouble as you traveled with Guy.
You shot through the trees. In the distance you could see the Valley of the End. The two statues stood tall at the end of your sights. You were almost to the border. The closer you got, the clearer you could hear the falls. They tumbled down into the canyon carved by battle. You had heard about it, but you never got a chance to actually see it. Breathtaking. You stopped to take it in.
“Why’d you stop?” Guy asked, coming to perch on the same branch as you. You took a moment to catch your breath, hands on your knees.
“I’ve just never seen it before,” You confessed, motioning to the landmark. You took a deep breath, standing back up straight. “This is the line into the Land of Sound. We should probably start walking soon.”
“We can take a break, you know. We’ve been making good time.” Guy offered. He had rarely seen you interested in anything. If you wanted to take in the valley, he would happily indulge you. You stretched your limbs.
“What, are you slacking off now?” you asked haughtily. “You don’t want to be the first one to the Sound?” You regretted saying that as soon as it left your lips. It definitely wasn’t a challenge. You were just being sassy, giving him a hard time, but Guy perked up.
“Are you talking about… a race?” Guy’s eyes were wide in excitement, a dumb grin enveloping his features. You huffed, hands on your hips.
“No, I don’t want to race-” But he left before you could finish. Not one to be outdone by Might Guy of all people, you started after him. You called out from behind, “You’re ridiculous!” Guy let out a hardy laugh in front of you.
“You only say that because you’re losing!” You sped up into the tops of the trees, running across the tops. Guy took a brief look behind him, not seeing you. But before he had time to fully look back in front, you slammed down a few feet in front of him. In an instant, you pushed on a smaller branch with your foot, bending it down before launching yourself forward. It swung forward, uppercutting Guy. He grunted as you advanced smugly. “Very interesting! Very creative!”
You moved forward, flipping and maneuvering among the tree limbs. But you couldn’t keep your lead for long. Neck and neck, Guy took a straightforward route. You closed in rapidly on the border to the two lands. You both swiftly passed by Hashirama’s head. In your peripheral area, you caught a glimpse of his opponent, Madara. You passed by their silent stare off, landing in the Land of Sound.
Guy had his arms crossed, his chest puffed. You blew a strand of hair from your face.
“Okay, you ‘won’. Doesn’t mean you have to gloat.”
Guy’s smile grew wider. You turned away with a scoff, beginning to walk down the outskirts of the forest. You found a beaten path. This was likely the route that civilians typically took. Guy followed as you sauntered away, trying not to betray how sore you were about your defeat.
Despite expending energy on your “challenge”, Guy hovered energetically around you. Out of your peripheral you saw his animaled hand motions. Your mind filled in the wide eyes and raised brows which he without a doubt wore. You strolled on and Guy chatted on. You didn’t know someone could talk for so long. You didn’t particularly care to register what he said. Perhaps, being tuned out was your mistake. You focused on the path ahead, searching for chakra signatures every once in a while. What you were not focused on, was the hand that came to clamp down on your shoulder. The fingers that brushed against your skin. It should have been a friendly touch, a playful gesture to most, but as soon as Guy’s skin met yours, the same electric current that you felt that morning coursed through your body.
It happened in an instant. The sensation faintly rose within you, looming, running behind the scenes of your sensory system. You felt it at your core, something that could only be described as purely Might Guy. His will stood out sharply and his energy zapped throughout every fiber of your being. The feeling deposited itself in your bones, picking up something to exchange. You felt it: the mix of emotions, the anger, the annoyance, and something else. Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on began to leave your system. You had never felt this feeling before. Your heart began to pound in your chest.
You shoved him away.
“Don’t touch me!” You shrieked. You stumbled a few steps back, wrapping your arms around yourself. Your eyes widened from your rapid heart rate. Guy had stopped in his tracks, slightly shaken, holding his hands defensively and low. You looked into his eyes, panicked. Softly, you warned him, “Don’t touch my skin.”
Guy’s eyes were on you, betraying worry. You felt that your heart had skipped a beat. You found yourself holding your breath. Your chest moved as you slowly exhaled. Guy waited for your word, standing stone-faced and silent. You flushed slightly, ashamed at your outburst. The corners of Guy’s lips turned upward as he gave you a reassuring nod. You relaxed, but Guy did not.
He glanced over your shoulder, unmoving. You turned only to be met with a pair of Sound Ninja. How could you not sense them before?
“Is there a problem here?” the first patrol asked.
“Not at all, sir!” Guy answered with his usual Might Guy charisma.
“No, problem!” You laughed, “There was just a spider! Came straight down on my head! Sorry to inconvenience you two, so embarrassing!” The two patrols weren’t interested.
“Yeah, I’m sure,” the second dismissed. He glanced at you over, eyes lingering in a downward position as he smirked. He shifted closer to you. Guy tensed. The first patrol came around you, to sandwich you and Guy between the two of them. “What’s your business in the Country of Rice?”
“Work,” Guy responded.
“Do you have work visas?” the patrol closest to you questioned, leaning down, his face now in close proximity to yours.
“Yes.” You took the opportunity to take a step back as you reached into the side of your pack. You produced two small booklets. The second patrol’s hands came over yours and took them from your hands. You felt a small shock, but nothing near as electrifying as when Guy touched you. Instead, it was the slimy feeling of a weak will. A feeling you were familiar with and confident you could conquer. You looked into the eyes of the Sound ninja. His hand lingered a bit longer at your stare. A small burst of chakra. “We are simple travelers and nothing more.”
The ninja’s eyes glossed over. You removed your hand from his. Handing one to his partner. You focused on the dazed ninja as he idly flipped through the little booklet.
“Aoki Genki-” You second glanced at Guy and then to you- “and Takeuchi Yume… tell me, have you seen any Leaf ninja wandering these parts?”
“We haven’t seen much of anyone wandering these parts.” Guy’s statement wasn’t false. “Why? Is something the matter?”
“Another patrol squad got roughed up at the border not too long ago. By what we can only assume from the fallout, it was a group of Leaf ninja.” The first patrol answered, following his partner’s lead.
You inwardly rolled your eyes. You got confirmation that the squad that ambushed you were ninja working on behalf of the sounds, but they were most definitely not at the border.
“How terrifying!” you feigned.
“Let someone know if you see anything,” The two ninja handed your visas back to you. You tucked them back away. “We wish you safety in your travels.”
“We will,” you assured them, smiling graciously, “Thank you for your service.”
The Sound patrol disappeared. The second ninja was still glossy-eyed.
You and Guy spent the rest of the walk in silence.
Finals have been crazy. I’m trying to do these once a week but the next might be delayed a bit. I’m trying to not edit these too much. I want to do this for fun but I can’t help but stress myself out when it comes to series and if people like them. I’ll keep doing these for fun! 
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smalltragedy · 3 years
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* herman tommeraas, cis man + he/him | you know donovan mercer, right? they’re twenty one, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, four months? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to ice boy by corbin like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole fear hidden behind a stoic stare, bleeding from your nose and from your gums, and the night sky with all its stars, with all its mystery and unknown thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is march 15th, so they’re a pisces, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )
looks away as i finally post his intro after being kinda awol fr however long. i love him a lot n hes also bri’s character mercy’s younger brother so u hv to be nice to him. think abt mercy’s life. then think abt ducky. im sry in advance tht his intro’s a little longer ive hd ducky fr like. a year or two n i’ve been playing him a While <3 as always like this if u’d like 2 plot n i’ll try 2 msg u bck bt otherwise im gna just hop right into threads bc obv i need to. change my methods.
ABUSE, VIOLENCE, DRUG ABUSE, EYE INJURY, GANG MENTIONS TW.
mini playlist.
father ;; the front bottoms / ice boy ;; corbin / lose yourself ;; eminem / my own worst enemy ;; lit / say it ain’t so ;; weezer / maps ;; yeah yeah yeahs / star stopping ;; lil peep / benz truck ;; lil peep / trauma ;; nf / northern downpour ;; panic! at the disco / your graduation ;; modern baseball.
statistics.
full name: donovan mercer.
nickname(s): ducky.
birthday: march 15th, 1999.
zodiac: pisces sun, aquarius moon, aquarius ascending.
mbti & temperament: intp & theorist / phlegmatic.
label: the despondent.
hometown: hell’s kitchen, new york.
sexuality: bisexual (bt not out). 
pinterest.
biography.
born in hell’s kitchen to vinny mercer and a mother who ran out of the hospital as fast as she could, as soon as she was able. she’d gone so quick that she’d never given ducky a middle name - just donovan. the younger brother of mercy (shoutout 2 bri)
his father’s the right-hand man of a well known mob boss named lars amaretto, and so, you can imagine the kind of environment ducky (& mercy) grew up in. weapon & drug dealings, interrogations, violence around every corner. a brutal way of living, no place to raise two children.
implied abuse tw // their father was not kind, or merciful - and ducky was a runt compared to mercy, small and sensitive and kinder than his brother. weak, and filled with softness, with big brown eyes and a smile that should’ve been able to melt ice - but it didn’t. and it never did.
he cried often, and was punished often for it until he learned to stop crying - at least in front of their father, and mercy too, at some point. only in the comfort of his room, with doors locked and blinds drawn closed. implied abuse end of tw
he dreamed, too, dreamt often. he’d been obsessed with outer space since childhood, as long as he could remember. school had once shown man landing on the moon, and ducky wanted that. wanted to be that, wanted to be there, up with the stars, discovering the unthinkable.
abuse mention // but it was discouraged, heavily so - projects destroyed by an angry fist only to be reconstructed to the best of ducky’s ability, with mercy’s help, all throughout the night. he’d saved up for a telescope when he was thirteen, but it’d been destroyed almost immediately when discovered. not a day went by that their father didn’t tell ducky that he was, first and foremost, stupid - and would always be. end of abuse mention
to the point where he stopped trying, simply. he never graduated high school.
abuse mention // anxiety mention // anyways … at the age of fifteen, he’d have enough. he was sick of the abuse, the pain - the crying behind closed doors, the sneaking around, the constant feeling of needing to escape, impending doom, anxiety attacks in the shower and in school bathrooms and at the back of the bus where nobody sat besides him because he was - that boy, the son of that man, the brother of that brute. he’d been a teenager and he’d already been an outcast by all means - an outcast in his family, no matter how hard he tried to appease vinny, and an outsider everywhere else.
the plan took months of preparation, paper ripped out from the back of his school notebook and stuffed beneath his mattress, details of his escape from a checklist of essential items to makeshift maps of bus routes to different cities.
all for nothing, the moment vinny discovered it, the edge of a map sticking out after a rushed morning.
heavy abuse tw // violence tw // it’d been the same day he’d gotten the nickname - ducky - the way the wound wrapped below his mouth, and the way it’d begun to heal - puckered, at first, like a duck’s bill. a better name than eyepatch, at the very least. the scar’d run from the arch of his left brow, across his eye, down his cheek, and below his lip. his eye sustained injury, and not allowed to see a doctor about it, it never healed properly.
eye injury // corneal scarring, impairing his left eye. astronaut dreams destroyed, but not in a matter of seconds. in the matter of an hour, maybe more - and that’d been much, much worse. 
he stopped trying to run away after that. tried to be more like their father, more like mercy - more brutish, less feeling. spoke less, and less. spoke hardly at all, unless spoken to first.
still didn’t matter. still lived his days in fear, still knew it’d never change. nothing would ever change.
the mercer brothers have been floating around the north carolina scene for ~5ish years now, trailing after their father who is consistently chasing after their mother with no luck. they’re currently residing in palm motel. can we get a hell yeah?
personality & facts.
he’s actually very? intimidating? when you first meet him. mercy’s younger brother, with a criminal’s record almost as long as his - a scarred face and a mean resting face. it takes at least five minutes of conversation beyond small talk before it starts to weigh on your mind that maybe, he’s not as bad as he seems.
and - well, he isn’t. but he’s guarded - so guarded. more-so than mercy, because mercy’s quicker to anger, quicker to react, and ducky tries so hard to drown out the noise. but he’s not a robot, and his facial expressions can give him away in a second.
he’s seen what happened when mercy had a glimpse of something good in his life (though, it wasn’t actually good at all - mercy had someone, at least. at the very least) - and how quickly it’d all fallen, and so ducky puts a barrier between him and others. distant, as much as he can be.
it hurts, because ducky isn’t by any means antisocial. he doesn’t hate people - he wants to be normal, wants to have friends and a girlfriend - or maybe even a boyfriend, god - but he’s so afraid. ducky is, by nature, a very scared person. terrified to his very core. he knows there is always eyes on him, and mercy too, and he knows that nothing is worth getting someone else hurt.
you know him as mercy’s little brother, and he’s quiet you know that - but his name is ducky, and you think - he’s not too bad. and he knows this, knows the doubts. knows that it’ll get back to mercy, eventually, that his brother is nothing more but a pussy. so he fights more than he’d like to, against the guilt that buries itself deep within his chest with every thrown fist. he throws up, afterwards, in the garbage can outside. too much to drink, he says, rare grin - because grins are convincing, and grins with bleeding gums are intimidating. he learned that from his brother.
violence makes him sick to his very stomach. he can’t watch horror films, or even action films, without feeling queasy. there’s been more times than he can count where he’d thrown up after a fight, or after an interrogation, usually in private but in the occasional presence of mercy.
they fight, a lot, sometimes - ducky’s too soft, too weak, and it’s bad and it’s terrible and ducky knows that mercy’s afraid. for him, of their father, and his wraith. ducky knows that if mercy isn’t hard on him now, their father will be on him harder. still. there’s resentment, small but there, like the flame of a match. he doesn’t know what’ll happen when there’s nothing more to burn, but he doesn’t want to find out. he’s afraid to find out.
he’s still in love with the moon and the stars, and the planet’s - and their moons, too. its subdued, now, though. a silent passion - one that is often not watered, left for rot. he sneaks into engineering lectures at the community college, occasionally, or physics, or whatever peeks the small curiosity inside of him.
commits small acts of kindness when nobody looks. doors held open, the meals of elderly folk eating alone suddenly paid. picks up litter besides trash bins, and always cooks extra than what he needs and leaves the rest for mercy. it’s these small things that make him feel, just the slightest, better about himself.
because god - there are layers and layers of self-loathing. it’s a labyrinth, and he’d never speak of it - but he can’t stand his own reflection. doesn’t keep photos of his family, only a few sparingly of mercy.
a liar, sad to say. has little experience with. ehem. intimacy, and the bodies of others, but lies often and says that he does. mostly to his brother, but word travels quick - and he’s not nearly as much as a fuckboy as is rumored, having only been with a handful of girls, if even that. it’s better this way - if people know that he throws others away like they’re nothing.
he ghosts often, too, if he does get to talking with anybody. the moment ducky feels a spark, something pulling at his poor heart, he ghosts. he develops feelings too easily, too often than he’d like. has left many friendships without explanation, because of this. you know the priest in fleabag season 2? the scene where he comes to fleabag’s house? yeah. tht’s ducky!
has maybe half the amount of clients that mercy does, but he’s working on it.
pretends he doesn’t care as much as he does. pretends a lot, like there’s nothing soft to him. but a trained eye can see clearly through this. even so - even if you can see that there’s more to ducky than violence and drug deals - you’d still have to break through a dozen walls.
in the rare occasion you get him talking - i mean, talking a lot - he’ll talk about space. ramble off a dozen useless facts about dwarf stars and black holes and all of jupiter’s moons. about a video game he likes, about nothing and everything at all. but as soon as he begins, he stops - embarrassed. apologizes, shuts his mouth, disappears to wherever. anywhere but there.
drug abuse // has a. complicated relationship with benzos n xanax n a various assortment of painkillers. ironic bc he hates drugs due to. his chosen career n wldnt do most of what they sell, bt yknow. this ws inevitable. hates beer bt forces himself 2 drink it bc toxic masculinity probably man idk.
overall just … he’s a soft boy, with a big heart - bigger than anybody else in his family, that’s for sure, but his exterior is far different than that, and it’s hard to tell.
violence mention // purposely loses fights so that he doesn’t have to severely hurt someone. because sometimes he just - he was raised in a violent environment, and sometimes he snaps. sometimes ducky just fucking snaps. and his vision goes red, and he can’t control himself - because need to survive kicks in, and violence is all he knows. if someone pushes ducky - pushes him enough, he breaks. he fights back. it’s all he knows. it’s all he knows. it’s all he knows, and that’s not an excuse - and he knows this, and god, he’s so tired. he is so. tired.
wanted plots.
u look good tonight ... ;; wld love a connection in which he is feeling emotionally compromised n maybe kinda hs a thing w someone bt hes like. very unreliable n kinda ghosting bc he is very afraid n it wld b maybe bad fr them to b anything other than hook ups. cld apply to smth very intensive or smth very surface lvl i’ll take thousands.
palms sweaty ... moms spaghetti ... ;; ppl tht ducky just hs fkn brawled. cld b anybody fr any reason. ducky prob lost n he prob lost on purpose bt also ur muse cld maybe kick ducky’s ass? cld b a fake fight cld b a real fight. cld b a npc fight n then ur muse cn patch up ducky? possibilities endless. maybe they hv a nice spaghetti dinner n both of them r both bruised up frm their fight. sometimes fights end in spaghetti dinners. thanks eminnem or whatever.
own worse enemy... ;; ducky needs friends bt hes bad at making friends n sometimes he fks shit up by pushing ppl away n self sabotaging n being a major cunt n sometimes he just ghosts bt hes always very remorseful abt it? this cld b a very like. up n down friendship of any type its just. where do they stand. r they friends. r they enemies. r they lovers? probably not lovers. prob just platonic. but still its the thought tht counts. 
and also ;; literally just like. anything. clients who buy off of him n like. casual friends n casual enemies n casual hookups. ppl hes ghosted. ppl hes embarrassed himself in front of. maybe ur muse tries to get ducky to socialize or maybe ducky is like. u are too much fr me. n ur muse runs off crying. endless possibilities all u hv to do is call this number now. 
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sanstropfremir · 3 years
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please let me join the dance conversation since it's the form of art i am actually the most interested in. i've been dancing as a kid for 6 years, and i don't mean to say that that gave me any type of authority in the domain, but it did leave me with the slight ability to recognize a good performance (or whatever makes a good performance to me, personally) and a great appreciation for valueing dancing as acting, like you said. too often i've seen dance ranking videos from actual life-long dancers who value technical skill above anything else. even if they take into consideration the facial expressions, it doesn't hold much weight and that always lowkey pissed me off. because when i am watching a performance, i care way more about the emotional delivery rather than the technical one. of course, this is not to disregard skill, because emotion without skill just ends up messy. good enough to appreciate as a form of authentic self-expression, but still messy, and mess won't make you a good dancer.
i've really enjoyed seeing you say dancing and acting have a mutual component since i've always felt that way too but never knew how to put it in words. two groups that come in mind when thinking about this are blackpink and itzy, i have no idea how familiar you are with them so i'm sorry if the following come across as foreign to you. but i gotta say, regarding bp, i think there's always been discourse over lisa vs rose as the best dancer. technically, everybody knows lisa is miles ahead, and i have to say she has decent stage presence and some pretty nice facial expressions too (taking into consideration how limited bp's concepts have been so far). rose, on the other hand, has a certain style that appeals to a specific audience (which i am not a part of, her lack of body control is so irritating sometimes) but i can see why some would find her charming. i would say her stage presence is decent too, but i can't help but choose lisa over her, and not just because i'm biased. but because in order to be a true dancer, you need the right balance between technique and emotion that gives your performance that star-value and appeal. and let's be real, kpop is really lacking in that "true dancer" department.
another dancing discourse that goes on is in the itzy fandom, where fans are pitting yeji and chaeryeong against each other. their techniques are quite different but they are each very good in their respective style. now, i've seen people call yeji the better "idol dancer" since she has better developed facial expressions, and chaeryeong the better "overall dancer" since people value her technique more. and i'm just like, no. emotion makes or breaks a dancer. everyone can learn technique, but emotion is hard to fake, and when you do, the non-authenticity is very much obvious.
that's why i love san as a dancer. he might not be the most technically skilled, but he is skilled enough to hold his own. and his way of living in the performance, of just letting every feel of the song wash over him and show the audience 110% and more - nothing compares to that, no amount of technicality. stage presence is something you just have, and no matter how much you train for it, you will pale in comparison to a natural.
wow, this is really long so thank you if you take the time to read it all and respond. english is not my first language and sometimes i'm having trouble finding the right words to get my point across exactly how i think of it in my mind, so i hope the message is delivered accurately, haha :D also, i must add i love the way you talk, your speech has a flow and a uniqueness to it you don't find everyday. and we love a developed vocabulary<3 may i ask how old you are?
thank you for the compliment, thats very sweet of you! english is my native language and i have spent just as much time, if not longer doing academics as i have doing performance work so at this point ive developed a very specific style. there’s a joke that theatre design is 90% communication and only 10% design, and it’s not wrong. it helps that i like to talk and my brain works very fast sometimes.
im glad you took the time to write this out! and don't apologize for your english, it's excellent and very clear. you are correct i know very little about blackpink and itzy but i would likely agree with you, dance is equal parts emotion and technique and that is my preference in idols as well. but i don’t think that the kpop industry needs to have ‘true’ dancers, though. yes it is fun to watch those who are technically and charismatically gifted in dance, it is only a portion of the experience that they market. also i think we lose a bit of objectivity in kpop because all idols are required to dance, but i dont think ive seen one recently that's a legitimately bad dancer. even the ‘worst’ dancers that i can think of are still leagues better than the average person on the street, but we see them as ‘bad’ because they work directly alongside peers who are legitimately gifted and have a passion for dance as a form. 
it's interesting to hear you say that everyone can learn technique but emotion is hard to fake, because i hear a lot of dancers say that. i think this comes from a misunderstanding of what exactly acting is and how it works. i would argue that a statement closer to the sentiment that you (and many others) are trying to get is ‘not everyone can do both at the same time.’ the average person is no more predisposed to acting then they are to dance, because acting is a skill that can be taught and exercised in the same way dance can. sure, there are people that have a higher latent ability, but if you put in the work, you can learn. why do you think there are acting classes and schools and conservatories? you can get a doctorate in acting if you really want to. the thing about acting is that in order to be good at it, you have to both understand and be able to implement the correct postures for mimicking human emotion. this is an insanely complex task when you get down to the brass tacks of it. just think about your face and body posture for a moment. why are you sitting/standing in that particular way? why is your face in that particular expression? what do you think your posture is saying to someone who is observing you? how would you change it if you wanted the person to start a conversation with you? if you wanted them to leave you alone? 
there’s also a general assumption that acting comes from a place of genuine or authentic emotion, and this is the fault of modern ‘method’ film acting. i have a very long thesis about how much i hate method acting and i can make a separate post about that if people are curious. but suffice to say, acting very rarely comes from a ‘genuine’ place. it may be informed from a genuine place, but by nature it is not real. thats what makes it acting. and i think dancers seem to be under the impression that showing emotion while dancing has to come from the dancer personally feeling those emotions, when thats not the case at all. this criminal fancam is a perfect example of exactly how good taemin is at putting on a character for a performance. you can very clearly see him drop character after the main camera cuts, and pretty much any concert footage shows this as well.
now, being able to do both a complex system of physical movements with your body and also control the minute details and timing in your facial muscles and posture? thats pretty fuckin hard. not a lot of people can do that, it takes just as much practice as learning technique does, just not in the way that people might think. but it is possible.
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insulationsun · 3 years
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hi claus i hope ur having a lovely day. i decided i needed to gush about ur art so !! everything you make is so incredibly lovely!! like,, ur EXPRESSIONS!! im telling ya everytime i see ur art i just,, the way u draw facial expressions and the way people are posed and just everything is so,, nice?? immaculate vibes, i guess u could say. there has literally never been a single goddamn time that i have looked at anything of urs and thought anything less than just 'holy shit this is the best thing ive ever seen' even if theyre small doodles! im not. an art person, i cant go in more detail than this, but i just. you are so incredibly good, i need u to know that. like i dont know how to say this in an actual comprehensible way but like even the way u color things is just !!! its very nice to look at!! it makes me go 'wow! woah!! i could stare at this for hours!!!' . and also that being said pls dont ever feel pressured to post more or do this and that, ur a person and not a content machine so !!! yeah.
and also seriously the art you just posted is so incredibly good. i love the way you draw ruby, the way u draw her hair! the dress shes wearing! the gloves!!! and OSCAR!!! i love my nonbinary son in his incredibly cute dress. the flowers are SUCH a nice touch it just?? AAAA okay thats all. yeah. have SUCH a nice day. AND ALSO IM SORRY FOR HOW LONG THIS IS. dont feel obligated to respond if you dont wish to, i simply just wanted to give u some well-deserved compliments!
!!!!!!!!!!!!! aaaaaaa!?!? aaaaaaaaaaa?? ohfbjsdkmvsdk.  this ask  took me out, (in a good way!)  but oh my gsh. dkmbdknsvjdsva. idon know if im equipped to respond to this ahhHH!!!!! WHAH !?!??  IMMM.. HELLO!!!!
ahhhhhhH what this is soo sweet!!! im!!!       dsnvdsvdjsvs ahh [ aaaaaaaa] !!!
im so glad  my stuff can be a source of happiness to you im.. this is such a lovely thought out message hdfnjdbdk ahh!!  im.. 
!!!!!!!! and dont apologize  about the length its perfectly fine..!! doesnt bother me at all..i am just very glad you get something  out of the things i draw sometimes!! and i appreciate it a lot, (esp on trying not to pressure myself to post more art its something i do feel guilty about occasionally so..ahh )  
but :D ahh!! thank youu so much!! oh my gosh yes..nonbinary son oscar...i think he and ruby would wear a lot of funky dresses together and try out different outfits together for fun!!! i had a hard time figuring out what to do with oscar’s tbh, i had a very clear direction with ruby’s dress but not really his so i kinda slapped things together and hoped it would work (lsdfsdkfdskjfds )  im glad it did for some people!!!   ah T_T ...thank you so much! this is incredibly sweet of you 
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angelicmichael · 4 years
Text
Is This Love?
Xavier Plympton x serial killer! reader
Summary: Reader is looking for her next victim but stumbles across Xavier, which changes everything.
Warnings: Smoking weed, not a lot of violence but it definetly talks about death and killing A LOT like not really in detail but just be careful when reading, no smut but a extremly steamy makeout scene happens, and sex is also mentioned I think once but it’s kept pretty vague.
Words: 5.5k+
A/N: First of all, sorry this is so fucking long lmao also I’m sorry this took me so long to write!! This fic was heavily inspired by the songs ‘Is this love’? By whitesnake and the music video ‘Your Body’ by Christina Aguilera. I love true crime so trying to write from a serial killers perspective was actually pretty hard but fun!! This fic was originally ALOT darker but I basically turned it to be really fluffy instead and I added some humor so enjoy :) please let me know if you wanna be on my tag list!!! This fic is also about to be posted on my AO3 if y’all are interested. Okay bye ♥️
Next Chapter
You had a itch but it wasn’t the kind that could be relieved by scratching. It more of a urge, a need, something you had to do..
You needed to kill.
And it had to be soon. This urge, this feeling wasn’t anything new to you. Ever since your last kill which was about a month ago, you could feel the urge building up stronger and stronger until now.. and you couldn’t suppress this urge any longer without literally losing your mind.
However you couldn’t just kill anyone. You needed the perfect victim, someone who was beautiful. Someone who had facial features that looked like they hand carved by god himself. Your victim also couldn’t be a random lowlife nobody. That would never do. That was the thrill of it for you, it had to be a risk - someone who would be missed if they were gone. You knew it was risky but you didn’t care - easy victims were boring. Simple as that.
However, today you had signed yourself up for a jazzercise class to of course work on your figure but more importantly to find your next victim. It’s not like you were gonna find your next target at a grocery store, and you didn’t want to make the mistake of killing a celebrity. Celebrities seemed to infest California like god damn cockroaches, and you knew if you killed one there would be a man hunt for you. That would also be a easy way to get on the FBIs most wanted list.. no thank you.
So that’s why you were here you were for another jazzercise class.
They were perfect for victim hunting, you had spotted many of your precious victims through jazzercise classes. You knew you were a couple minutes late for today’s class but you wouldn’t let that stop you - if anything it was good because it would draw attention to yourself and let your potential victims notice you first.
You quickly paced into the building and it was easy to tell the class had already started. You could hear the music blaring from outside, that grew increasingly louder as you approached the room. You wore your hair down - dancing with your hair down made it about 100x easier to seduce just about anyone you set your eyes on. You also sported a extra tight outfit that showed off all the right parts of your body.. You were going to find your dream victim today. You just knew it.
You carelessly threw your bag you carried with you outside of the dance room before entering, you were already pretty fucking late. You really didn’t have any time to spare to drop it off at the locker room, and plus, you were always here taking various dance classes here so it’s not like the workers didn’t know you. You ripped open the door that lead into the room where your class would be held and quickly threw yourself into the room.
“Sorry”!
You half whispered as you nearly ran past the instructor and found a empty spot in the room. When you turned around you noticed the instructor gave you a quick wink and you couldn’t help but notice how gorgeous he was. He had frizzy blond hair, eyes so blue you could nearly drown in them and a beyond perfect body. He looked like a fucking ken doll. You knew it right then, he had to be yours. He was perfect.. too perfect.
You could barely contain yourself from grinning or jumping with joy at being able to locate your next victim so easily but you instead channeled your energy into your dance moves. Even if you couldn’t talk to him quite yet, you might as well impress him with your moves.. right?
It must’ve been working because throughout the entire class Xavier kept his eyes mostly on you, in fact it was a wonder if he looked anywhere else in the room.
~
Even though you were covered in sweat by the time the class was over, and in a desperate need of a shower, you still made sure you were the last one in the room.. And finding ways to stall and not look suspicious was embarrassingly difficult.
You left your bag outside of the room so the only thing you could do was drink your water painfully slow and look busy..
You were so preoccupied with trying to keep the illusion up of looking busy that you didn’t even notice that everyone else besides you had filed out of the room. You also didn’t notice that your hottie instructor was approaching you until you felt a light hand on your shoulder..
You jumped about a foot in the air - effectively spilling all of the water from your water bottle onto you. You let out a sharp screech as well.. and immeaditly felt the embarrassment start to course through your body as if someone injected you with some kind of ‘instant embarrassment iv’ or some shit. You felt the blood start to rush to your cheeks as you could only think of how stupid you probably looked.. your body was starting to sweat again as well, you didn’t even know you had anymore sweat left in you after that class.
‘So much for catching the perfect victim’.
You thought cynically. You could feel the frustration starting to manifest inside you as well, frustration from the lack of killing and the fact that you were now soaking wet. And cold, very fucking cold.
You kind of just stood there as you threw your (plastic) water bottle onto the ground and glared at the man who was in front of you.
“I am so sorry, are you okay”?
He asked. The ruthless and stoic expression you wore seemed to melt away quickly after you heard his words and even looked at his face. His words and concern seemed so genuine, you couldn’t help but feel bad for even glaring at the poor guy about two seconds ago. Even just by looking at him, you could tell he actually felt bad for what had happened. However, no sweet he looked, the frustration and the lust that you still felt to claim another life still lingered within you.
You also couldn’t help but notice how gorgeous he was up close. Typically people who looked beautiful from far away showed some flaws when they were looked at up close but you swear this man had absolutely no flaws. His skin was perfect, his hair, his eyes - and his lips looked so deliciously soft. How was this man even real?
You blinked a couple times and licked your lips as you realized that he was still waiting for a reply from you. Duh.
“Yeah, I’m okay. I could use a towel though”.
You giggled as you looked back down at your wet clothes and your wet self with shame.
“Oh yeah, of course! Towels are back here”.
He led you out of the dance studio and across the building, it wasn’t too far of a walk. On the walk over to get towels you two ran into a couple of people he knew, you assumed his close friends or maybe coworkers? It was hard to tell at a first glance. You didn’t stop to talk but just wave.. and you assumed they were his close friends by how they were all looking at you. They all seemed to look you up and down and one even gave you a wink. You assumed that this guy didn’t talk to many women.. and maybe this was why his friends seemed so excited to see you with him? Oh fuck, could he be gay?
Oh fuck.
You knew this whole thing was too good to be true. You would still be able to kill him if he was gay of course, being gay did not give someone a out of jail free card when it came to being murdered but seduction would be out of the equation for sure - and the whole act of seducing your victims before death was your favorite part.
Typically what you did to your victims was lead them on and make them think you were going to have sex with them - and then right before either of you would take your clothes off you would slit their throat with the knife you kept on you. That same knife was even in your bag right now but if this guy was really gay, your previous plan to end this guy would be a no go. You would have to get creative with this one.. or just give up entirely.
You were brought back into reality when you realized he was trying to lead you into a locker room, a men’s locker room to be specific. He stood in the doorway, gesturing for you to come inside but you hesitated. You bit your lip and contamplaited.. a quick look over your shoulder showed you that his friend group was nowhere in sight and either was anyone else really. No one would see you.
You grinned as you quickly turned your attention back to the man in front of you and followed him inside the locker room. You quickly observed that the locker room was completely vacant execpt for you two, thank god.
“So do I get to know your name”?
You said, still keeping a sweet smile on your face.
“Only if I get to know yours”.
He said, also sporting a small smile as he tossed you a cream colored towel that you catched.
“(y/n)”.
You replied.
“Xavier”.
“Makes sense that someone as pretty as you would have a pretty name to match”.
You said with a smirk, and you noticed how Xavier softly laughed and how his cheeks dusted a light pink color. He almost looked like he was embarrassed, it was fucking adorable really. You did a quick double take around the room to make sure you two were truly alone before you made your next move.
“There’s no cameras in here right”?
You asked, your fingers delicately holding the hem of your shirt. Xavier took a couple steps toward you, getting closer.
“No. There’s not babe”.
He said, he seemed to be studying you now - waiting for your next move. Maybe you were just imagining it but you swear you could just see a glint of lust in his eyes. You figured the fastest way to see if he was really gay or not would be to take your shirt off - his reaction would quickly tell you.
You took your other hand and hooked your fingers under your wet shirt and quickly pulled it off in one quick swipe, leaving you exposed in your bra. You dropped your shirt behind you on the floor, the wet noise it made as it hit the floor seemed to echo throughout the bare locker room. You gently put the towel Xavier gave you on the bench that was right next to you, judging by where things were going - you wouldn’t need the towel anymore.
“If I knew you were gonna take me here I wouldn’t have asked you for a towel, you know”.
You said, nearly whispering because he was so close now. You took a step closer to him, your faces only a couple inches a part now. You left your lips parted and you looked into his eyes.. and that was a fucking mistake. All of the common sense you were holding onto left and all thoughts you previously had seemed to thin out and dissolve into nothing.
You could taste his breath now he was so close. All it took was for him to put his hands on your waist and you gave in. You closed the distance that kept you two apart and you kissed him. Hard.
This was breaking one of your major rules that you kept for yourself as a serial killer. You tried to always make your victim make the first move - to kiss you first. This seemed to keep them on their toes and wanting more, and it kept you in control. However, being here with Xavier, all senseable thoughts you once had were long fucking gone. Right now, you didn’t care about anything else execpt for kissing him. Everything else seemed irrelevant, you just wanted to live in this moment forever.
The kiss started off sweet but it continued to grow more heated as you kissed him harder and harder. Your hands wasted no time in finding his shoulders as your nails started to dig into his skin. You impatiently bit his lower lip - wanting more.
You felt Xavier softly break away from you, but he didn’t move away too far from you, his face moved over to whisper in your ear,
“Jump”.
You instantly jumped and you felt him catch your legs, essentially holding you up as he continued to keep kissing you. You felt him take a couple steps and in this moment you didn’t care where he was even going too - you just.. felt different. Maybe it was a new emotion, but you felt peaceful for once in your life. And it felt way too fucking good to let go of. Not to mention you were beyond happy he wasn’t gay like how you suspected.. but it wasn’t your fault that you knew zero straight guys that instructeted jazzercise classes or wore short shorts and actually looked good doing it.
However.. You also felt something else and that was unprepared. It was clear to see where this makeout sesh was really headed too and your knife which was in your bag, was no where near you. In fact you had no fucking clue where it was which meant you couldn’t kill him now, you would have to ask him out.
You felt Xavier gently put you down on the ground, you could feel the rough surface of lockers poking up against your back. You were on the verge of mentioning how uncomfterable you were when you heard a deafening loud creak echo throughout the locker room. Someone was opening the fucking locker room door. Fuck!
You felt a jolt of anxiety run through you like electricity as you two instantly seperated, and tried to look as innocent as possible. You wiped your mouth and you and Xavier both stood up before you actually bothered to look who came into the locker room in the first place.
“Hey love birds”!
You heard a chirp, female
Voice. You couldn’t help but laugh- was it common for girls to just waltz in the men’s locker room? When she walked forward and came into view, You easily recognized her as one of the people from Xaviers friend group that was waving at you two ealier... In fact, she was the one who winked at you ealier as well.
“Nice to see you too ‘Tana”.
Xavier grumbled back, after he swiftly rolled his eyes. You assumed ‘Tana was short for Montana and she certainly looked like a interesting character.. espically if she frequently went into men’s restrooms. Her hair was a white bleached blonde - so bleached that her hair looked entirely stripped and dryer than the god damn Sahara desert. She had heavy blue eyeshadow on her eyelids and you couldn’t help but admire that she atleast tried to put a effort in her appearance.
Montana stood right next to Xavier and it was obvious to tell by the looks they exchanged that she wanted to talk to him - alone. She awkwardly shifted glances between you and Xavier and you bit your tongue, the realization hitting you like a freight train - what if this was his fucking girlfriend? Normally with victims you didn’t have to jump through so many hoops but Xavier was different. Something about him was very different from the rest of your victims but you were still trying to put your finger on exactly why. You cleared your throat and figured before you left like they wanted you too, you should atleast introduce yourself.
“Hi, I’m (y/n)”.
You said, sporting a smile as you took a step forward toward Montana to shake her hand. She took it and shook it a bit too roughly and spotted a grin that would even make the Cheshire Cat jealous.
“I’m Montana! It’s nice to finally know the name of one Xavier’s girlfriends”.
She said with a excited look on her face. You quickly opened your mouth to speak - this girl was pretty straight forward wasn’t she? Atleast you knew she wasn’t dating Xavier.
“Oh - im not his girlfriend, we actually just met but you know.. I wouldn’t mind changing that”.
You said, adding a playful wink and biting your lip while staring instensily at Xavier. You knew you were being incredibly straight forward as well but at this point you didnt care, you just wanted to see him again.
Xavier finally stopped looking at Montana and met your gaze as he took a couple steps toward you.
“Me too, babe. My place tonight at six? I’ll pick you up”.
Xavier said and you quickly gave him your address and awkwardly left the locker room with Montana’s stare burning holes through your back. Maybe she was just jealous?
It didn’t matter, after tonight Xavier wouldn’t exsist anyway so who even cared what this supposed friend of his thought of you... but. Something weird was happening to you. The thought of actually killing again made you happy - yes. Just the act of taking another’s life and seeing them suffer but having it be Xavier? You barely knew the guy but it almost made you sad to not be able to see him again after tonight. He really did seem like a sweet guy with good intentions but that never seemed to stop you before.
You went back to the lobby and quickly picked up your bag that you had left there (albeit carelessly) and you figured tonight you would bring your knife just in case. You had a feeling that you wouldn’t be able to kill him tonight - the vibe felt off. Plus, since when had you been on a actual date that didn’t involve murder at the end?? The answer was never. You deserved to have a nice date, with a pretty person. Murder could wait until tommorow.
~
Montana and Xavier both stared at
you as you passed them, and watched as you left the locker room. However, they both held their breath until the locker room door completely shut close. Montana snapped her head forward once the door shut and decided to be the one who first spoke.
“Xavier, that person is not to be trusted”.
Montana took a couple steps toward him as she spoke. Xavier immeaditly furrowed his eyebrows in a look of confusion, he could feel himself automatically getting defensive. He loved Montana (as a friend of course) but he swore Montana took that love in a different way.. And this made it obvious. He just met you, why was Montana already investigating into you and making wild accusations? This made no sense unless perhaps Montana had feelings again for Xavier.
However Xavier merely crossed his arms over his chest and shook his head.
“That’s funny coming from you”.
However, Montana didn’t laugh or even smile. She continued to look completely serious, as she spoke.
“I’m not kidding. I don’t care if shes pretty or a good kisser or whatever the hell. You need to promise me you won’t see them tonight like you said”.
Her voice first started out as harsh and then grew soft and almost vulnerable.
Xavier shifted in place and nervously licked his lips.
“Montana what the hell. I’m not just gonna blindly follow what you say”.
Xavier said, his words spitting venom as he spoke. At this point he really didn’t care if he was coming out as harsh - Montana had a boyfriend.. why couldn’t she just leave Xavier alone with this new girl he just met?
Montana stepped closer to Xavier and put both of her hands of his shoulders and looked him dead in the eye as she spoke.
“You need to listen to me Xavier or your going to get yourself killed”.
Montana’s cherry red lips turned into a snarl.
“I saw their bag in the lobby and there was a knife in it. It was a fucking big knife Xav, no one just carries a knife like that”.
Montana added but Xavier was still in denial. Xavier looked at the ground as he slightly paced back and forth in place.
“How big of a knife”?
Xavier asked quietly.
“Its a fucking butchers knife. I wouldn’t be worried if it was a pocket knife, Xavier”!
Montana replied and Xavier kind of froze. He didn’t know how to react, he knew all of the men that had gone missing as of lately. And he also knew that they were all around the same age and had the same appearance that he had. Could he really be the next victim? He felt tears start to prick at his eyes, there was no way. This girl he had met ealier was so sweet, just because she had a knife didn’t mean she was a fucking killer.. right?
All that Xavier could think to do in response to this was to look up at Montana sadly.
“Why were you going through their bag in the first place”?
Xavier asked, his voice coming out as jagged and rough with emotion. However, Montana still continued to act stoic as she nearly yelled at him.
“You nearly hooked up with a fucking serial killer and your concerned about my priorities? Dude, you need to promise me you won’t see them again”.
Xavier stared at Montana blankly. It was obvious what this was about, he knew Montana really found no knife and he also knew Montana made up this whole story because she was jealous. That was it. Montana just didn’t wanna see Xavier with anyone else, that was the bottom line.. Xavier rolled his eyes.
“Whatever, Montana. I have another class to get too”.
He could hear Montana protesting and yelling his name as he walked past her but he didn’t care anymore. He was determined - he was going to meet you tonight at six, whether it killed him or not.
He had to admit to himself though, even though he was excited to see you again a part of him dreaded it. He knew there was a small chance that Montana could be right - and what if she was?
Even though Xavier knew he was in pretty good shape he knew his muscles magically became useless when it came to self defense. He was shit at self defense honestly. He was good at archery but he didn’t own a fucking bow and arrow.
He made a mental note to pick up a pocket knife before coming to pick you up. If you really were a fucking killer a pocket knife wasn’t going to stop you but it was sure better than nothing.
~
Six O’ Clock came and went and Xavier picked you up in the glamourus Vanta-C. Being in a van that smelled heavily of weed and nothing else wasn’t too exciting but somehow Xavier made it fun, like how he did with everything it seemed like.
He had a sort of magic about him, the type of magic that made you actually start to feel things for once - feel different emotions that you had never felt before. Like would you even dare say it, love? Well, maybe love was a bit of a exaggeration - you just met the guy after all - but, you had no idea honestly.. you had nothing else to base this off of, you’ve never really had a crush or romantic interest on anyone before ever. The interest you’ve had in your other previous victims was always based off of looks - it was the thrill of the chase that appealed to you more than anything. However, you couldn’t say that about Xavier. After meeting him ealier - you were dying to get to know him better so that you could probably fall in love with him, if you were even capable of doing that.
Maybe it was foolish to assume that Xavier would be taking you back to his apartment, or house, or wherever the hell he lived but he didn’t. You two stayed in the Vanta-C which he drove and parked it in a park that was a couple blocks or so away from where you resided.
It took you two a while to decide on a decent place to park the car and go to - at first it was a matter of where to go. Whether to go and get food, or head over to someone’s place or just stay in the Vanta and obviously the last option won.
You had to admit the scene you two were in was starting to get rather romantic - not that you experienced this type of feeling before but rather You based this feeling off of movies and other various entertainment you’ve watched; this is what romance seemed like to you.
The sun was just starting to set; painting the sky a various different tones of purples, blues and pinks as the sun started to dip further and further into the tree line. You and Xavier both ditched the front and the passenger seat and both camped out in the very back of the van - where the seat was really more of a glorified couch than a actual seat.
The windows were all shut and so were the doors, essentially so that you two could hotbox. You never thought that a pretty boy like Xav would smoke weed, but you also thought he was gay at first so - you found it best not to assume anything about him anymore.
There was plenty of room left on the back seat but you and Xavier chose to sit incredibly close to eachother. You sat side by side and your shoulder and arms touched but you didn’t mind of course. The closer the better.
Your bag was pooled near your feet, near the door which was away from Xavier. Sure enough, the knife was inside but it was hidden under a couple of other objects that you kept in your bag. The longer you spent with him, the more you were regretting bringing the knife in the first place.. because it was making you fucking neurotic. When he first picked you up, all you could think about and focus on was that god damn knife and how it would end up slitting Xavier’s throat by the end of the night. However, you seemed to be more relaxed the longer you were around him. It was hard to tell whether it was just the vibes he gave off or the weed that relaxed you so much; maybe both.
By now, the thoughts of killing and that stupid knife had become lost and put somewhere far off in your brain - somewhere you couldn’t access when you were high. You barely even noticed you were Intensely staring down your bag until you felt a soft hand gently rub down your arm.
“Hey babe, are you okay”?
You looked back up at Xavier to only see him wearing a puzzled expression of his face - which looked adorable with his blue puppy dog eyes. You also noticed in his other hand (that wasn’t still on your arm) was the blunt you two were smoking - oops.
“Yeah, I’m okay”.
You replied, your voice small and rather quiet. You took the blunt from Xavier and took a deep hit, and sat with the smoke in your lungs for a couple seconds. It wasn’t until you felt the smoke burning and eating away at your lungs and throat was when you exhaled. You exhaled slowly, dreamily watching the smoke cloud up the Vanta-C even more so than it already was.
Before you even knew it, or consciously decided to - you heard yourself talking.
“Actually, no. I’m not okay.. I have something to tell you”.
You swallowed and took one last quick hit before handing the blunt back to your new lover and looking him in the eyes. You saw something in his eyes that was new to you - was it fear? Why he was he scared?? It was only a glimmer of fear that you caught in his eyes but still - it defintly threw you off guard. You just saw his lips part like he was about to say something when you quickly spoke first.
“Xavier, I’m crazy about you”.
You blurted out, with a embarrassing giggle. You blamed being incredibly straight forward on the weed, of course you would never be like this if you were sober. Never.
Your lips closed into a closed mouth smile, you had more to say but you figured to wait for some kind of reaction from Xavier first. The glimmer of fear you saw in his eye ealier seemed to morph into confusion, disbelief, and then happiness. Pure happiness.
“What”?
He laughed.
“You heard me! I know I just met you, but Xav’ I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.. and I mean it”.
Xavier gently placed his hands on your face - on both of your cheeks - before deeply kissing you. You placed your hands on his chest which effectively made him start to lay down while you gently maneuvered your way on top of him so that you two would be laying down on the long back seat of his van.
You moved your leg up to straddle him when you felt your foot snag on something. At first you merely tried to pull it away free but to no avail. Xavier broke away from you since he could feel you moving your leg vigorously and you managed to get your leg free with one big final yank of your leg.
You snapped your head to see what the fuck dared make this gorgeous man stop kissing you when your heart stopped - it was your bag. You must’ve hooked your foot around your bag and when you freed your foot you managed to topple the bag and spill out all of the contents... which meant your butchers knife was on full fucking display for Xavier to see.
FUCK.
You felt your breath stop as the world seemed to come to a stand still. You felt frozen, bewildered and caught off guard but you definetly didn’t feel scared. You moved your leg over awkwardly to straddle him but the vibe had defintly changed. The romantic vibes that seemed in the air ealier had been swept clean and nearly were completly gone. You decided to try and save your ass and be the first to speak.
“Xavier I-“
“Get off of me”.
He spoke softly and his voice was lowered. You took a deep breath as you awkwardly climbed off of him and you two sat in the position that you two were in ealier - side by side execpt you two were farther apart this time.
You tried again to explain yourself but Xavier spoke first.
“What the hell is this? W-why did you bring that knife”?
You noted how his eyes started to have tears building up in them. You absentmindedly moved the knife back into your bag with your foot and noticed how badly Xavier flinched away from you when you did so. Your turned your focus back to Xavier.
“Look, I know it looks bad but I just keep it on me for self defense. You know, with the night stalker and all”?
You said, with a slight giggle. Instantly, the tension that built up was broken and it was almost like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. He laughed and he scooted up the seat to get closer to you - stepping on all of items from your bag that were still on the ground but you didn’t really care. You were just happy you were able to pull off that lie and convince him you were someone else you really weren’t.
A thought crossed the back of your mind of how easy it would really be to just reach down and grab the knife and easily slit his throat. It would be almost too easy, but no.
As Xavier pulled you into his arms and you layed down into the rough fabric of the back seat, you felt safe (which was incredibly ironic). You felt at home, and in love.
As you turned your head to continue where you two had left off at the locker room, you couldn’t help but hazily day dream about tommorow.
Just because Xavier’s life was spared didn’t mean your thirst or your itch to take another’s life was gone.. it just meant it would have to wait until tommorow.
Taglist: @guiltyfiend
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laiqart · 4 years
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The Untamed vs MDZS Anime: Which is better?
Going to japan now. Currently in the plane. The in flight tv is broken. So... ive been watching mdzs on youtube!
Hot damn the animation is beautiful. Every frame is a work of art. How the hell. Its so beautiful. I mean they use 3D a lot for the backgrounds and boats but its still gorgeous and not too jarring. The lighting is so realistic, scenery too. All the fighting choreography is beautiful. The way the swords swing in the air looks so fluid, and when swords clash its in flashes of light the color of their sword. Such a tasteful yet stylistic choice. Everyone's, esp wwx, hair is so flowy, so detailed every strand sways in the wind. The waves reflect light and move smoothly. How the hell did they do that. How. I was thinking of doing those screencap redraw thingy with the scene when wwx whacks lwj's boat. (they also emphasised how far lwj's boat was sinking into the water, which makes it more convincing how wwx can deduce that theres something underneath vs the live action where lwj's boat looked normal..) it was damn beautiful. The thing is, the point of these redraws is that the animation looks simple, so the redraw would enhance the scene. But for mdzs, everything is already in peak quality, redrawing it will only look worse. Its like writing fanfiction of books. The original writing is so damn beautiful, fan fiction ends up being such a stark difference that the reader cant help but compare the 2.
Drama, as everyone says, shows better facial expressions due to the live actors, so emotions hit harder. But anime def LOOKs way better in all action scenes. Angles that follow the characters are used to emphasise scale between enemy and chracters, and all the movements feel so dynamic, and i love how when they use talisman spell thingies they got a circle of light in an intricate pattern thats super beautiful. In the drama, its just a piece of paper.
However, i prefer drama's lwj. Maybe cos wyb looks so young, its more believable when he freaks out over the adult book that wwx gives him in the library scene. In the anime, he looks 20+-30+. Its a bit hard to believe that he'd be worried over that. Idk theres a kind of innocence and naivety that leads to the stubborn refusal to express emotion that young lwj is plagued with that we have in the untamed (was this intentional on wyb's part or is it because the teenage lwj wig made his eyes look floaty, so he seems more like a teenager and naive, less experienced as a cultivator vs lwj 13 years later? Dk but it works!). In the anime, he looks like an adult thats calm and level headed already from the get-go. Idk maybe i just havent watched enough (only seen up til the water demons in caiyi town). In both anime and drama, everyone and i mean EVERYONE besides the fricking babies looks the same 13/16 years later. It doesn't feel like time has passed at all. I wish they would have maybe a change in costume, or hairstyle in the anime. The drama at least changes their costumes a little and neatens the hairstyle of jiang cheng and lwj to indicate maturity.
Btw i love that in the anime for the water demons section they had wwx and jc casually chatting (though its a blatant cornetto ad which is fricking weird. How can there be frozen treats back in those days), then wwx beautifully catapulting himself onto a boat and rowing away showing the unique and romantic af mode of transport in caiyi town, then smoothly transitioning to the lan bros on the bridge right above them with lwj asking why lxc decided to bring them along. Its just tying together so many scenes, quickening the plot along and yet doing it so naturally and seamlessly compared with the novel and drama.
Though i like that the drama involved wn and wq and have wwx save wn, and makes way more sense why wn would want to risk his life to help wwx recover his parents fricking corpse illegally right under the nose of wen chao and wen zhuliu.
The anime removed the entire mystery plot of a yan and the fairy goddess statue and thats honestly the best best best choice to make. In the drama, it was one of the worse sections ever cos i didnt understand who all these random ass characters were (it was one of the first mysteries in the drama) and yet it didnt go into detail like they did in the novel, so not only did i not know what was going on, i also didnt give a single shit about the characters. When i saw that they completely did away with the random passer bys who screwed around with the fairy statue, i was thoroughly impressed.
I liked that the drama let nhs have his own trouble making moments tho, like having him sneak a live bird into class. It makes it more convincing that wwx would be friends with him because they both have a mischievous side that they can both appreciate in each other. In the anime, nhs just looks like a loser nerd thats weak in swordplay and does wwx's homework for him, without a will of his own. It doesnt make sense why wwx would keep him around. Then again, maybe itll make the reveal that nhs is a conniving mastermind more impactful for the anime, oh well only time will tell.
I liked that lxc and lwj look similar in the anime. Its more convincing when people call them the twin jades of the lan clan. In the drama, they hardly looked like brothers. Lxc looks more like lwj's mentor or teacher rather than an older brother. In the anime, they look more siblingy.
I miss drama wen ning. I rmb when he looked so fierce and terrifying in his first appearance. I was legit intimidated. Oh how hes changed! Hes so fluffy now. In the anime hes equally menacing. His fight scene with the statue goddess was so beautiful. Doesnt it take a long time to animate the chains moving so fluidly yet dynamically yet somehow looks like it can disintegrate rock in an instant? The lighting on it too, how it reflected the fire of the forest around them. Have i mentioned how beautiful having that fight scene at night was? It was dark and ominous looking, yet the fire cast an epic looking light over the scene with warm orange glows. And the animators had that fiery light reflected in anything they could find: eyes, chains, swords.
Ooh but jiang cheng's whip looked prettier in the drama than in the anime, which is kind of weird given they were both cgi-ed. Somehow the lighting of the whip in the drama was brighter, looked more like real lightning vs the whip in the anime looking a little dull, like they colored it then added a gray filter. This is kinda bizarre given the laughably bad effects of the effects for everything else in the drama. Visuals for non human things is not the drama's strong suit, so it makes u wonder what happened for the anime whip. Maybe in the dark, the lightning would have to look hella bright and reflect on the surroundings (tedious to color) more so than in the day, hence why it looked worse in anime vs drama. Oh well.
As for lan sizhui, its weird that his voice is so deep in the anime (and audio drama!). Ive always seen him as a kiddo thanks to the live action, so hearing him sound mature is kinda off-putting. He sounds like a leader, and gives off lwj vibes vs in the live action where he gives a goody two shoes studious nerd vibe, whos just trying his best. Maybe this is better, he feels way more like a lwj-raised child(serious and business-like) which makes more sense. Live action lsz feels like a wwx(optimistic and intelligent) AND lwj(well-behaved and sensible)-raised child. Anime lsz looks like hes got his shit together. Jinling is fairly similar in both, maybe less prideful in the anime (in live action theres the scene where im pretty sure he indirectly kills one of his men by wishing for the fairy goddess statue to come to life. That was a hella asshole move. This was omitted in the anime.) Jingyi in the anime somehow looks snarkier. Maybe cos he straight up duels with jinling and kicks him down a dark cave. Ive been wondering why all the tumblr posts depict ljy as this sassy ass short tempered kid when he was quite tame (though sassy by lan standards) in the live action. Now i know.
The costumes for the drama is better, more detailed though thats expected i guess. I just love that they have little white gusu lan clan uniforms that wwx jc and friendos are required to wear. Its so cute and such a cool detail. In anime, theyre all in their usual garb, and they just look like random people who decided to turn up at lan qirens class. In the drama, it looks more like a school that they have to attend for half a year and it feels characteristic that gusu lan clan would require their students to have a uniform, given their incredibly strict regime type. It also serves to separate the happy carefree school days from all the other tragic af events in wwx's life. His costume starts out white showing innocence and purity of his naiive teenage years who had yet to experience hardship and still feels invincible as a youth. After school, he wears dark blue, as he goes on an adventure with lanzhan and experience how important the yin iron is (gives up the joking light hearted nature as a teenager by realizing the gravity of situation if the wen clan gets their hands on it) and maybe that hes not truly part of the jiang clan who wears purple. Then his costume eventually becomes black as he experiences his first life and death situation that he isnt sure he can handle. That child like assurance that "oh the seniors will let me off" or "im sure jiang fengmian will come to my rescue" gets demolished when he undergoes cruel indoctrination at the wen clans. This visual development may be a bit on the nose, but personally i love subtle representations.
Overall, the anime does do a better of job of explaining the world's mechanics, which is quite important. The drama is quite faithful to the book, at times even more so than the anime, so it irks me that this is the one thing they decide to skim on. The god damn premise, the first thing the audience needs: why the hell is wwx alive again and what is mo xuanyu doing?? I guess the drama thought that it explains itself but it doesnt really. It was really confusing. The anime, though somehow faster than the drama, still has the time to properly explain mxy. A technique ive noticed is that they do exposition during the fight scenes, which is so ingenius. Its visually appealing, as always, so its not boring, the viewers gets to understand whats going on AND it gives the sense that the characters are so skilled that they carry causal conversations while fighting supposedly weak enemies like zombies and water ghosts, which is accurate seeing how wwx and lwj and friends are supposed to be one of the most powerful cultivators.
TL;DR both are good lol
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killinbills · 4 years
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How would your ocs do their makeup
i think it’s kinda difficult to say for each because obviously the only way i know how to do makeup is how i do it myself, but like, i can try and make up some details??
(looking back i believe i posted something similar to this but ive changed my thoughts so hi)
since emilia is super cool and lowkey a bougie mum, mia would’ve been shown how to do her makeup etc when she got to that age, and emilia would’ve bought her a little starter collection. i can imagine mia liking a purple eye from time to time, and also she’d use those eyeshadow crayons that you can smudge the shimmery colour on. i don’t think mia would wear much or at least, make a statement with it. like her style reminds me a lot of like alexa chung with the whole “effortlessly cool” vibe
isabelle is rich so she’d have all the skin treatments in the world lol. her fave would be that vampire facial one bc of the name. i don’t think isabelle would acc wear makeup but instead she’d get all the stuff done — so she wouldn’t wear mascara but she’d get her lashes done, same as her brows tinted etc. but then when she needs to get dressed up she’d do a full face, like foundation n the works.
briar wouldn’t wear foundation bc of her freckles but she’d wear a decent amount of makeup. like she’d wear a full face, but bc her freckles are showing through people wouldn’t notice how much she’d got on. briar likes the idea of getting ready and doing her hair and all that so she wouldn’t *mind* spending time on it?? she is v much the freddy cousin brown type. like when she’s left school i can imagine my bby briar going to get her nails done every couple of weeks aw
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