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#excited to see who buys an apartment next
luvknow · 9 hours
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sanguine satellite | lee minho
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Summary: The last time you saw Minho was five years ago when you rejected him to live out the rest of your twenties in the city. The next time you see him is on your birthday with another woman in his arms, and it sparked everything that was good, bad, and ugly. Now, after years of not being in each other’s lives, Minho tries to repair the friendship he broke while you fight your changing feelings. As you struggle navigating your friendship with him, you struggle more to navigate being single in this next stage of your life. Characters: Lee Minho x fem!Reader, feat. other idols Genre: friends-to-strangers-to-lovers, romance, angst, emotional hurt with comfort, happy ending, slice of life Additional warnings: cheating, alcohol consumption, food, aged up a bit and in turn age insecurity, a lot of mentions of a best friend with another idol WC: 18.1k
Today was a pivotal day in the office. Quarter two earnings were released to the public and other divisions of the company and, well, let’s just say with the increasing rise in inflation and the impending recession that everyone refuses to acknowledge, no one wants to buy anything. As a result, the earnings reported negative and stocks dipped, morale was low, and to top it off, it was only Monday.
In a way, this was a metaphor for your life; a tumbleweed of all things that could go wrong did go wrong and formed into an amalgamation of nothing to show for. Some people found value in the mundane, but this was supposed to be the peak of your career, your magnum opus, before progress plateaued and you couldn’t stand the idea of not feeling enriched. To wake up, leave, work, and go home was the reason you wanted to leave your home in the first place for something richer in the heart of the city. But you felt defeated after clocking out at 8:30 PM and slumped on the seat in an empty train cart.
The view of the lively apartment high rises and the warm light of slow brick-and-mortars made the late night train rides worth the twenty minutes. Work wasn’t always this draining, but after climbing the corporate ladder, more money meant more responsibilities and it quickly drained the light from your eyes as it did with many of your peers and friends. Youth was fleeting and today you felt like Ponce de Leon searching for the fountain to no avail, but at least the train would take you as close to it as it possibly could.
After packing up your life from home five years ago to move with your friends, the only plans twenty-something-year-olds ever had in place were reservations at 9:00 PM because you called the hottest spot the day-of and drinks at the bar next door after clocking out at 5:00 PM. You were young, excited, and hungry for life, barely sober most days and experiencing what it meant to be young; but what must be given, something must also be taken. Now, rent was rising, salary increases were few and far in between, and instead of deciding what martini you should be ordering, you were stuck wondering if being a worker bee individual contributor was worth the lull schedule or if taking the path to management and telling whiny subordinates what to do was worth the salary bump.
You and your friends once joked that stuff like this was what people in their thirties worry about. Today is your thirtieth birthday.
You didn’t have time for dinner and once again thanked the real estate Gods who put a restaurant so greasy at the corner of your block that you practically slid on a snail trail to the front door of your loft. So, here you were; eating under-salted french fries, chugging a crispy diet cola, with oil stains on your white button-up, ready to spend the rest of your birthday and probably the rest of your life alone on your overpriced and uncomfortable couch watching the latest drama you’d sob your eyes out to. All you needed now was a pet as your companion and you’d be the whole single-in-your-thirties package. Maybe you’d use that as leverage in your dating apps: looking for a partner, a pet, or both.
After fumbling with the keys, you sighed into your dark, cavernous home and dropped your bag at the door. When you turned on the lights, you saw the ghost of your soul leave your mouth in a loud gasp.
“Surprise!!”
You were greeted with streamers, glitter, balloons, and your closest friends wearing little party hats with their beautiful smiles. You never doubted they remembered, and most wished you happy birthday at midnight, but you should have sensed something was wrong when Chaeryoung asked for your door passcode because she ‘forgot her chapstick on your coffee table.’
She was the first to tackle you in a tight hug. “Happy birthday, mi amor!”
“Let the woman take her shoes off first, damn,” Jisung scolded.
“Wow, there’s certainly a lot of you,” you giggled after prying her off. “You guys shouldn’t have. Really! It’s Monday.”
“All the more to celebrate something worthwhile,” Chan grinned, handing you a glass of wine. “Welcome to the club.”
“Ugh, thanks.” Chaeryoung yanked away the oily bag of fries while you were distracted with the happy juice. “Hey, I’m hungry!”
“Don’t fret! We are having a dinner party because that’s what thirty-year-olds do.”
“Except we ate already because we thought you were coming home well before 9:00 PM,” Hyunjin grinned sheepishly.
“No, yeah, I love when my friends watch me stuff my face.”
The dining table was decorated with burgundy candle sticks, red roses, and black bows. It was definitely a step-up from your twenty-first bubblegum pink and pastel confetti birthday, but this almost seemed… meek? Romantic, sure, but a little dark for a birthday. As Chaeryoung scrambled to fill your plate with take-out and prepare the cake, everyone took their place back at the table. The lights dimmed and out came a jet black cake with a toy knife and red frosting that read, ‘Happy Deathday to Your 20s!’
“A bit dark, but accurate,” you mused.
“Make a wish-!” A knock came at the door. “Shit.”
Everyone looked at each other awkwardly. Chaeryoung, Chan, Hyunjin, Jisung, and their partners were present and those were the only people you regularly hung out with. Who could be left?
“Are people still coming?” you asked.
The boys collectively shot a look at a wide-eyed and frozen Chaeryoung, none of them willing to break the news or catch a stray. “Um…”
“What did you do?” you accused. “You didn’t invite that one guy I told you about last month, did you?”
“No, but I wish I had.” Another knock. “Coming!”
“It’s not a coworker, is it?”
“Worse,” Jisung mumbled. “For you, at least.”
“Minho!” Chaeryoung exclaimed happily. “You’re just in time!”
“What -” you hissed at the boys, “- the hell?!”
They all held their hands up in defense. Minho passed the threshold and your twenties flashed before your eyes. The once blondish short and styled middle part now hung loose in soft chocolate strands; eyes that once held the universe were dark and doe-like; and arms that once moved freely in his sleeves now tightened around them. He was a completely different man who you hadn’t seen in five years and here he was at a pivotal moment of your life, about to celebrate you and the life you’ve lived without him for the better half of the last decade. It took all your might to lift your sore legs to walk over to greet your guest and restrain from strangling your best friend. He wore clothes appropriate for a casual dinner party that didn’t spill into the blues of corporate-wear, clearly aware of this occasion, and a small gift bag. His appearance was intentional, not upon happenstance, which made this whole ordeal a lot weirder.
Following him in, hand-in-hand, was a woman. A stranger. Two strangers in your home.
He pulled away from Chaeryoung’s death grip and you locked eyes. It’s awkward, to put it politely; to put it rudely, it was horrifying. Your nervous system certainly felt nervous, firing fight-or-flight responses the way he drank you in like the first sip of a bitter negroni. How someone could evolve and change to the point of being unrecognizable should be studied by Darwin.
He’s the first to break with a small smile to ease the tension. “Hi.”
“Hi,” you breathed.
“Happy birthday, _____.”
The bag is small and neatly wrapped with care in your favorite colors. The woman behind him smiled sweetly. “Thank you. You really shouldn’t have. And thank you…?”
“Oh, right. This is Karina, my girlfriend of two years.”
“It’s nice to finally meet you,” she said. “I’ve heard a lot about you. And happy birthday!”
You brain buffered when she bowed. How awkward, because you haven’t heard anything about her other than her existence. You never thought he’d have someone so beautiful. Minho blocked you on social media a long time ago, so you wouldn’t have recognized her. Chaeryoung had to kick you back to life. “Ah, it’s nice to meet you, too! Welcome to my home.”
“There’s wax on the cake!” Jisung warned.
“Oh, hurry in! _____ was about to make a wish!” Chaeryoung pushed the three of you to the dining area.
There’s a bitter taste on your tongue watching him dap up the boys and watching her hug them so warmly. You never faulted them for being neutral. They were just as much as his friends as they were yours but having him here created a thick glass wall on your side of the table, like he was icing you out in your own home; that you paid with your own hard-earned money, mind you! This was as close to a defense mechanism you could build.
Nine people were watching you, all of whom were paired with another in the room except Chaeryoung, in your home. There’s a heavy shroud of dread that’s draped over your makeshift invisible box you struggled to keep upright. This was supposed to feel like a celebration of you, but it quickly turned rotten when you realized you were the only single person on your own side of the table, being made a spectacle as the couples moved closer and watched more intently. It was like they were watching a ghost of singles-past, feeling more appreciative of the life they procured together as you watched their hold on each other tighten ever so slightly.
“Make a wish,” Jisung sang.
You stared blankly at the three sparkling candles. What was there to wish for? You had a good career, a warm home, food on the table, and loved ones who kept you up on your feet. You supposed a better work-life balance would be feasible, but that was something within reach and in your control. To wish is to pray and to pray is to beg, and you weren’t one to beg for anything except for the pickles Chaeryoung picked out of her sandwiches. What was something that even you couldn’t control, something you had to ask some spirit dwelling in the ether for?
A flash of Minho’s eyes boring into yours made your face hot. Maybe you’d just let this wish go to waste instead.
You blew out the candles and applause erupted with Chan eager to cut into the cake. It was your favorite flavor from your favorite local baker whom you trusted every birthday and holiday to deliver the finest treats. At least this part of your birthday was perfect.
“So, what does thirty feel like?” Hyunjin asked. “Do you want the number of the senior home down the street from me?”
“Ha ha,” you drawled. “Aren’t you next, Hwang?”
“Actually, Minho’s next – ow!”
Chaeryong didn’t hide how she elbowed his ribs. She then gave a wide smile and her fingers danced. “Do you feel more mature?”
“As mature as a dry-age steak.”
“Well, you pair well with red wine, at least.” Chan raised his glass. “Here’s to you and to all of us, our priceless friendship!”
Most of us, you wanted to correct, but decided against being uncouth. “Cheers!”
When you were all in the younger halves of the twenties, conversations were about memes, pop culture, and the new hottest bar that just opened. Now, as you were ranting about quarter one earnings and the Windows 11 update, the others doubled down on the corporate jargon. Even Karina, who revealed she was a consultant in tech, participated in the conversations. Minho was the only one who remained quiet, but he was simply enjoying the company, leaning back in the chair with his arm around his woman. For someone who had never visited or even wished well on past birthdays, he was making himself quite at home.
Your birthday dinner lasted long enough to finish off three bottles of wine between everyone and for all the food to disappear, making clean-up much easier. As everyone scrambled around your home clouded in buzzed-up nonsense, Jisung was the one to tour your apartment with Minho and Karina, telling the tale of every picture you hung on a wall or framed on a credenza.
“This was when we went to London one summer after my graduation,” he said. “I’m the youngest, so I was the last one and we decided to make it a big celebration. I think this was the day Minho and _____ got lost and almost hopped on a train to Edinburgh by accident. This one was from Chaeryoung’s twenty-fourth birthday. I think Minho took this picture, actually.”
“Where are you in these pictures, Minho?” Karina wondered innocently.
There’s a breath of silence in the loft aside from you who didn’t pay any mind to his girlfriend’s ignorance. Not like you expect your fallout to be a topic of conversation over a candle-lit dinner date, anyway. You also didn’t expect that look on Minho’s face when he realized that to be true.
“He’s usually the one behind the camera!” Jisung answered, not exactly lying. “You’ve seen his Instagram and how he composes his cat pictures.”
Minho didn’t try to correct him, and they quickly moved on.
As it was the first day of the working week, Chan, Hyunjin, Jisung, and their partners were the first to leave. For whatever reason, Minho and Karina decided to stay back. Karina’s motive was unclear; either she was really bad at reading the room or the effort to be friends was genuine, but even when Minho asked if she wanted to leave with everyone, she decided against it.
“Let me help you take the garbage out,” she offered Chaeryoung.
“I can do it,” you and Minho said in unison.
“Nonsense! It’s your birthday and this one had a little too much to drink before coming here and when we got here.”
Chaeryoung gave you a sympathetic look as they carried several bags out to the ground floor. What a convenient day for the chute to be broken! They’d take the five-to-ten minutes of traveling to the ground floor out to the back where the bins were.
And then there were two, standing on opposite sides of the kitchen island, unable to look each other in the eyes after five years of abandonment.
“Hi,” he greeted again, lips flat-lined and unsure of how to move this conversation forward.
You beat around the bush. “What are you doing here?”
His tongue poked his cheek. “I ran into Chaeryoung last weekend at the bar I work at and asked what she was doing for your birthday.”
“Why would you ask that?” you asked coldly.
“I… just knew she'd be doing something for you. Maybe she took it as me asking to get invited, but that wasn’t my intention. I think she panicked, invited me anyway, and here I am.”
“You could’ve said no.”
“I could’ve,” he agreed, and there’s a mischievous twinkle in his eyes that asked, ‘but why would I?’
You looked away. “Isn’t this a far drive for you?”
“I live here now. Well, not here; on the other side, closer to downtown and near that bar.”
“Oh. How long have you been a city dweller?”
“About two years now.”
That lined up with his relationship status. It was a fact that it was easier to find partners in the metropolitan, yet somehow you were the only one to remain alone after being one of the first to move here. How was it that Minho managed that in under a month? And if he’s been here for two years, how have you not realized that?
You swallowed the rest of the wine in your glass. “How do you like it?”
“I love it.” He ran a hand through his tired head of hair, creating a split down the middle. The redness on his face had spread from his nose to his cheeks, as it always did when alcohol invaded his bloodstream. “I see why you wanted to move here.”
He, too, must have seen how time was of the essence, and with what little time you have in your young lives, the highest quality of life would be to live where your peers were thriving. If only he understood this years ago.
You nodded sourly, feeling the loneliness resurface after having to repress it for so long. “I’m happy for you.”
“Your mother once told us, ‘mean what you say and say what you mean.’ You don’t have to lie.”
“Don’t tell me what my mother says.”
Tension as thick as jell-o separated you from him. There’s a brief stare down after your threat, or what sounded like a threat, and you swear there’s hurt behind those big eyes of his, but he wouldn’t be the victim here; not when he was the one who left your life and blocked you out of his. He didn’t have the right to be offended by your unwelcoming attitude when he was never welcome to begin with. On your birthday, at that.
Chaeryoung saved the evening and rushed back inside, afraid of the damage you’d tell her later.
“Ready?” Karina asked, squeezing Minho’s bicep.
“Yeah,” he mumbled, being the first to break contact. You didn’t help him see his way out, but he said over his shoulder once more, “Happy birthday, _____.”
“Thank you for coming,” you called out sharply.
“It was nice meeting you!” Karina said cheerfully.
“You, too.”
Chaeryoung, the kind woman and hostess as she is, hugged them both and hastened to lock the door. She rushed back, clinging to you and holding your arms inside, likely afraid that you’d break something or chug the rest of the fourth bottle.
“I’m so~o sorry!”
“He told me how it happened. Tell me why I’m not surprised?”
“It was at the bar near your work that I told you about. You didn’t come because you had some reports to submit before midnight. And who do I see behind the bar? Minho, of all people! He was running that shit like the navy! It was hard to talk long over the music, but we said our hellos and he quickly brought up the fact you were turning thirty and asked what I was doing because he knows how much I love you and I’m the bestest friend ever – Anyway, I told him about the surprise, and he looked so damn sad! Jesus Christ, so you know me, an empath, I had to at least offer him an invite. I didn’t think he’d take it, nor did I think he’d ask to bring a plus one, like, yesterday!”
In the midst of her ramblings, you squirmed free from her grip and pulled the poor pouty girl into a tight hug. “I will not let him ruin what you’ve done for me. I love you and appreciate you.”
“It was so hard!” she whined. “The boys are so unreliable! I ask them to buy something for decorations, they don’t answer, and when I ask a few days later they’re like, ‘I got it a while ago,’ and I’m like, ‘why didn’t you say something?!’ and they’re like, ‘I didn’t think I’d need to as long as I brought it the day-of.’ Can you believe that?!”
“After over ten years of friendship, yes, yes I can.”
After cleaning up the remaining crumbs and dishes, Chaeryoung found the gift that Minho and Karina left on one of the chairs. “Did you open it?”
“No. What if it’s a bomb? Can you do it?”
She tossed out the tissue paper and peered inside fearlessly. “Oh!”
“What is it?”
“A gift card and a perfume bottle; a pricey one. Ooh, it smells good!”
The gift card was to a new bar that was opening on the same block as your office. Your boss was excited to finally have a happy hour location so close that you haven’t gone a day without hearing about it since its announcement. The name on the card said ‘DAHLIA’ and the amount it held was five hundred dollars.
“Huh,” Chaeryoung mused, “isn’t this address very close to where you work? And you like dahlias. Scary coincidence.”
“Do you think he’s stalking me?”
“Maybe it’s Karina.”
The perfume was in a sleek clear bottle with a white face and gold cap. It smelled of marshmallows, orange blossoms, and neroli. It would be the most expensive thing you’d own, cosmetics wise.
“They open on Friday,” she said giddily. “We should go!”
The projected menu on their social media did look really good… and they had variations of your favorite drink and ones you’ve never heard of.
“Think of it as a ‘celebration’ to the start of a new quarter! Since it’ll be slower now, right?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, accepting that poor-quality reasoning for a twenty dollar cocktail. “Ok, let’s go!”
Your best friend squealed happily and dug through your closet, plucking out the shortest skirt in your wardrobe.
--
On Thursday, Chaeryoung canceled on you to go on a third date with the guy she’s been seriously interested in. She was hoping to finally become an exclusive dating couple; not exactly boyfriend-and-girlfriend, but they’re not allowed to see other people since they’re exclusive, so it’s a label-without-the-label situation that you struggled too hard to grasp. If the majority of your peers thought that way about dating, maybe it was a good thing you remained single.
When you exited your office’s high-rise that day, on your way to the train, you passed by an alley in between the Italian place and the coffee shop you and your co-workers frequented. There was an inconspicuous red ‘OPEN’ light at the end above a black door that caught your attention. In a small serif font, the letters ‘DAHLIA’ was stamped on the door. Friday was supposed to be the official opening day according to their social media pages, but there was no mistake it was open as indicated by the bouncer standing guard.
You did have the gift card in your wallet, and you were craving that crispy green tea highball they had in one of their posts. It was only 6:00 PM, maybe they’d have some happy hour deals going on and you could report back to Chaeryoung with your findings.
You walked up to the doorman. “Hi, are you open –”
“I.D.”
Well, that answers that. He allowed you to pass into the low-lit glowing bar. It wasn’t busy like a Friday evening, but almost all of the tufted couches and chairs were filled, leaving a semi-vacant bar up for grabs. The aura of the bar is what one might describe as ‘vibey and chill’, as the low hum of the bass from the hip-hop song in the background vibrated your heart. This was as soft as a soft-opening could get.
On the menu, there was a special on the drink you were looking forward to and a snack pairing: rice paper and seaweed chips with a salt and togarashi seasoning. You knew all those words separately but couldn’t comprehend them together.
“I.D., please,” the bartender asked.
You fumbled for your wallet and mumbled, “Why bother carding at the door if you’re just –”
You dropped your wallet when you saw Minho at the other side of the bar in a white button-down that was buttoned barely half-way. His lips curled teasingly.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” you gasped, popping your head up after picking up your wallet. “What are you doing here?”
“Is that the only way you’ll greet me from now on?”
You felt your face burn even before any alcohol entered your system. “Chaeryoung mentioned you worked at the other bar nearby.”
“I own that one, too. This one I just opened.”
“Oh, well, that makes more sense. Wait, ‘own’?” He nodded sheepishly. “But that bar has been there forever. I thought that old guy owned it?”
“He was looking to retire, so I jumped the gun and bought it. Kept it mostly the same, added some things I thought would pick up a trend, and it did so well that I was able to open ‘DAHLIA’.”
“That’s incredible,” you congratulated. “I guess I shouldn’t feel so bad that the gift card is so expensive.”
He smiled, but it didn’t translate to his eyes. “Do you work nearby?”
“At the tall building down the street.”
He’s just as taken back as you are. Maybe he wasn’t stalking you. “Crazy coincidence. But it’s late already. Long day?”
You sighed. “Most days are this long.”
“Yikes. Can I get you a drink?”
“The green tea highball looks good.”
“Coming right up.”
Minho rolled up his sleeves to his elbows and did his witchcraft. In a highball glass, a ludicrously elongated ice cube was placed. Then, two shots of Japanese whiskey from the mid-shelf (never mind the overpour), an ounce of cold brew jasmine green tea, and what little space was left was topped with club soda. Using a long bar spoon, Minho mixed its contents and offered it to you with a stainless steel straw.
You hummed happily. “Whoa.”
“I agree.”
“Where was this on my twenty-first?”
“I dare you to Google the whiskey I used and see if you think we could have afforded that at twenty-one.”
“I see your point.”
There’s a long pause of waiting for the other to say what they mean and to mean what they say. You thought about how coldly you displayed yourself to Minho and it ate up your thoughts the whole week. Even when he was the one who wanted you out of his life, he was the one to find you and it seemed he was here to stay, to be next to where you worked, and to be a part of your everyday life as you’d think about him every time you passed this alley between the office and the train. Was this a gift or a curse?
The wound was still fresh, but he was not the only one to blame.
You cleared your throat. “Listen, I –”
“I think –”
You both paused again. After all these years, your wavelengths were still in sync.
“Go ahead,” you offered.
“I think…” …We shouldn’t talk when we see each other? I shouldn’t have given you a gift? We should unpack the trauma we gave each other over coffee some time? “You should try the snack pairing.”
Possibly the best words to leave his lips. “Please.”
“One sec,” he said before running to the kitchen.
Your palms were sweaty, but if anyone asked, you’d feign it was from the condensation on the glass. Your first real conversation with Minho in five years was more stressful than presenting to upper management. Any courage of apologizing had fizzled and the fear of being vulnerable was chilling. You hoped the rest of the drink would give you that push.
Minho came back slightly breathless with a bowl of curly seaweed and rice chips with red seasoning. He stared at the glass that was almost full just a second ago.
“Would you like another one?”
Your vision was already swirly. “No, thank you. But these look delicious.”
The crunch from the fried rice paper was loud enough to make some heads turn. It was salty and the seaweed flavor shined through. The punch from the togarashi made you wish you had taken up the offer on another drink.
You let out another happy hum, and your sinuses cleared. “Wasabi!”
“Really sobers you up, huh?”
“I can smell colors.”
He let out a genuine laugh and you got a glance of his little bunny teeth. You wondered if he’d still have them when he was sixty.
The shy bartender fiddled with the kitchen towel. “You were going to say something?”
“Right. I’m –”
“Excuse me!” a customer approached the bar. “Can I have an espresso martini?”
“Absolutely!” Minho said in his customer service voice.
Espresso martinis were all the craze these days, especially with the ladies. You understood why, they were delicious and reminded everyone of a sweet little treat before the work day. You watched as Minho threw in his Boston shaker ice, vodka, coffee liqueur, and cold brew, and shook with all his might. The muscles you noticed on your birthday shined through, as the veins on his forearms and biceps were put to work. Your eyes traveled shamefully to his open chest, focusing on the groove in between. He poured the creamy drink into a martini glass and added it to her tab.
You drank the complimentary ice-cold water before he returned.
“Sorry about that.”
“No, no, I’m the one interrupting your work.” Despite drinking a multitude of fluids, your throat was dry and sharp, like the words were scraping skin on their way out. Just say it, dammit! “I’m sorry how I treated you on Monday.”
He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have ambushed you like that after so long.”
“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have.”
“For that, I’m sorry. But I’m not sorry for attending.”
“You should have chosen another time to meet.”
“Your thirtieth birthday is important. It’s a huge milestone. I couldn’t dream of missing it.”
“I don’t think that’s for you to decide.”
He hung his head in a way that a puppy would when being punished. “I know.”
“You –” you choked. “I don’t know. I don’t know what or how to feel.”
“Maybe we could start over.”
“Start over?”
“Hi,” he held out his hand for you to shake. “I’m Minho, I’m a bartender and chef, and we met when we were nineteen.”
“Minho –”
“Would you like to get coffee next door some time?”
“You are ridiculous.”
The rush of after-work over timers hit the bar like a thirsty school of fish. Two other bartenders jumped in, but they needed Minho to keep up a good speed. From his navy pants pocket, he pulled out his business card and slid it over.
“My number’s on the card.”
It was different from the one you had saved on your phone and he knew that. “Wait, I need to close out my tab.”
“It’s on me. Let me make up for Monday.”
He didn’t allow you to get a word in before taking the next customer. His mannerisms made every customer smile or blush. ‘Come closer’ he’d gesture with his finger, leaning in to hear their order, and winking after handing off the final product; rinse and repeat.
You left a hefty tip under your glass and slipped away from the crowd. At home, you spent half an hour rubbing your cheeks, unaware of how sore they were after the train ride.
--
The business card hung on your fridge under a London magnet. Every day, you’d wake up, stare at it while filling your water bottle, leave for work, come home, and stare at it some more as you prepared dinner. In the same serif font in black ink, in the center of the card was his full name. Under it said ‘Restauranteur’, followed by ‘DAHLIA’, the Japanese flavors-inspired bar, and ‘RED LIGHT’, the one with American flavors. His phone number and email were in small print, all information embossed on an off-white business card. ‘Classy’ was the most appropriate description of such a card, while yours was so plain in comparison. Technology products didn’t need that kind of pizazz, to be fair.
The next time you saw Chaeryoung was for a girls’ night-in on a Wednesday to gush about her new exclusive not-boyfriend. She noticed the business card while putting the dishes in the sink and plucked it from the fridge, already aware of what transpired on Thursday before.
“‘Restauranteur’,” she scoffed. “Ok, Minho.”
“I know, right? Can you believe he bought out that sleazy old man?”
“I always wondered why the quality went up all of a sudden. I can’t believe he hid that from everyone else, too! We’ve all been meeting around that area for months! Why did he give you this, though?”
“I guess he changed his number.”
“What? He’s had this number for a while now.” You shot her a deadpanned look. “Oh, right. You wouldn’t have known whether he changed it or not. Did you hit him up?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Why would I? It feels… too soon.”
“Five years feels too soon?”
“No,” you sighed, unable to form the words in the right sentence. “We’re already on awkward footing after my birthday. And seeing and talking to him made my blood pressure spike to an unhealthy degree.”
“So, you’re nervous?”
Nervous wasn’t right. It felt much deeper than that. “Afraid.”
If anyone knew the degree of pain and confusion you held for Minho, it was Chaeryoung. She always did her best to understand, but there are some things one must experience to understand, and this was one of them. She held you firm by the shoulders and knitted her brows.
“Give me your phone.”
“What?”
The music streaming on your phone paused as your best friend moved swiftly to the couch, already propping her feet up on the chaise before you could register what happened. The clicking of your phone keyboard over the bluetooth speaker snapped you back and you ran to join her.
“Wait, don’t!” you warned.
“‘Hey, bro’,” she said as she typed, “Too casual?”
“I’m thirty. I don’t say ‘bro’.”
“All right, jeez. ‘Hello, Minho. I hope this text finds you well. Per our last meeting – ’”
“Now you’re just being a dick.”
“I’m kidding, relax! ‘Hi, it’s _____. It was nice seeing you on Thursday.’”
“I wouldn’t say it was a ‘nice’ meeting.”
“Oh, my God, shut up. ‘Good to see you on Thursday,’ happy? ‘Would you like to get coffee some time?’ And send. This is fun, it’s like when we used to project our dating app DMs on the TV! Oh, wow he’s typing already. Asshole, he never answers any of us in the group chats until the next day.”
Texting a boy and sweating, waiting for his response… Were you thirteen again? The notification ding made your heart jump.
Your brows furrowed, matching Chaeryoung’s. “‘Hey! Of course I would. Just tell me when.’ Um. Tell him sometime next week?”
“‘Tomorrow at 11:00AM?’”
“Chaer!”
“‘See you then.’ You’re welcome!” she cheered, tossing your phone on your lap.
“Now he’ll think I’m excited…”
“Whether you are nervous, excited, or afraid, shouldn’t that mean something? That maybe you still have him in your cold, dead heart somewhere?”
“It took years of therapy to heal what was wounded. I don’t know if this will feel like closure or if I’m opening up my stitches.”
“And I’ll be here to help suture if it comes to it; again and again!” she encouraged, leaning her head on your shoulder. “I just want our friend group back together, you know? This is a start, sort of.”
“I know. Don’t get your hopes up, though.”
“Too late.”
--
The day it happened, the clouds were grey, and they cried and cried, pouring down the heaviest rain of the year. It rattled Minho’s windows like bullets made from hail, drowning the silence and filling the room with nothing but sorrow.
Tonight, you were celebrating your new job and the big move. After the plates were emptied, the music that played over his speakers slowed, and filled with wine and tenderness, you two swayed to the rhythm in each other’s arms. First, he had your hand in his and lightly hovered over your waist, leading the waltz across the living room with ease. As the songs progressed, his hold on you tightened. He laced his fingers with yours, traveled his hand to your lower back, then placed the other there, too, after wrapping your arm around his neck. He pressed his forehead to yours, the tips of your noses touching and nuzzling so sweetly it made your heart soar.
He sighed happily, shoulders relaxing under your arms. “Should we be doing this?”
“Hm, I don’t know,” you replied light heartedly, “you are just a friend, after all.”
“Do friends do this? Should we ask Chaeryoung and Jisung?”
“Not if you want to hear them gagging all night.”
His breathy laughs hit your lips and his eyes fluttered closed. “I want to kiss you.”
You’ve wanted to kiss him for five years. “Then kiss me.”
“And I want you to stay.”
“Stay?” You took a step back, hating the cold air that replaced his space. “What do you mean ‘stay’?”
“Don’t leave,” he begged.
“Minho –”
“Stay here with me.”
“No,” you said firmly. “This is the biggest thing to happen to my career, and I’m not throwing away this grand opportunity. Won’t you come with me instead?”
“You know I can’t leave my family right now.”
“Then,” you sighed, “do I wait for you?”
“Wait? We have options; what about long distance?”
“You know how vigorous my career is. I work long days and long nights. I can’t call you or text you the way that other people do.”
“So what?” he argued, throwing his hands up in frustration.
This was the first time you were having this talk. Never before had either of you revealed the feelings that mingled in the air whenever you were in the same room together. For years, you repressed them, too scared to cross the thin line that separated friendship from lovers and unwilling to feel vulnerable and reveal the true feelings of your heart. Because truthfully, you wouldn’t have time. You wouldn’t have time to drain and pour your heart into something – someone – that wasn’t the projects that laid out on your office desk, and how was that fair to someone you loved so dearly? As much as you wanted to love and to give, you couldn’t.
“I can’t,” you repeated. “That’s not fair to either of us. We deserve one hundred percent of each other, not fifty, or even ninety.”
“You’re not even willing to try?” he mumbled.
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. “How could you spring this on me the weekend before I leave?”
“This was my only chance –”
“No, it wasn’t. You had five years. Five years! And you know how important my career is to me!”
“What about me? Aren’t I important to you, too?”
“Don’t,” you stuttered.
“No, it’s not that I’m not important, it’s that your career is more important. Is that it?” When you couldn’t answer, he nodded his head, accepting the poor answer. “All I wanted was for us to try.”
“I can’t give you one hundred percent of me.”
“Then I’ll give more! One hundred ten percent; one hundred fifty!”
“How long can you last like that when you don’t know when we’ll be together again?”
“I won’t know unless we try.”
“I don’t want to try. Trying means uncertainty. For five years, I have been certain about you. But I’m certain it won’t work when we are not present.”
“We’re going in circles.” Minho turned and ran a hand through his fluffy, light bronze hair. This color on him, you remembered, made him look so young.
“I can wait,” you whispered. “We can be friends still, and –”
“I don’t want to be friends.”
You couldn’t decide if your mouth should hang open or sew it shut forever. Still, you managed to slip out, “What?”
“It’s all or nothing for me, _____.” His eyes mirrored your glossy ones and the tip of his nose that was just on yours a second ago was reddening. “I don’t want friendship with you. I want love and passion, and I want you to tell me you want it, too. We aren’t friends; we never were really just friends, you know that, don’t you?”
“I know.”
He closed the gap and his hands found yours, squeezing so tightly it was almost painful. “Then show me that you know! Tell me you want this! Tell me you don’t want to be just friends! Tell me you want me, desire me, that you can’t go a day without having me, the way I would for you!”
You shook your head. Long distance relationships never worked. You witnessed it through your coworkers, through friends, and bosses, and even old classmates who had deleted every existence of their past love and left no digital footprint on their timeline. Every relationship you ever knew to be long distance had never worked out, and you knew this one wouldn’t be any different.
He let go and stepped away. “I wish you a fulfilling life in the city –”
“Don’t do this.”
“– and I’m sorry, but I can’t be friends with you –”
“Minho, please…”
“– I can’t be just friends with someone who has my heart and doesn’t know what to do with it.”
Instead of rescinding, instead of apologizing and taking the leap of faith, taking the risk that came with being vulnerable and open and raw so you could see what it meant to be loved and cherished by someone who wanted to love and cherish, you decided to lock your heart away and to never reveal it to anyone ever again.
That was the last time you saw Minho. On your thirtieth birthday, he broke every layer you built to protect yourself in a matter of seconds.
--
“Earth to _____!”
In between ‘DAHLIA’ and your office, there was a coffee shop with outside seating. As you waited at one of the tables, the record player in your head had recalled that night, and once it started, it wouldn’t stop until it finished. Just as you finished, Minho arrived and waved a hand in front of your face and you wondered how long it took for you to notice.
“Sorry! Daydreaming.”
“About work?”
Did he truly think your mind was entirely consumed about work? “Yeah. Work.”
“Well, you keep daydreaming, and I’ll get us coffee. What would you like?”
“No, it’s my turn to get you something!”
“Nonsense! You also tipped me way too much. You still order the usual?”
If you were one thing, you were consistent. “The usual.”
Minho would do this finger-gun thing when he was feeling awkward, and he did so as he walked to the counter. His outfit wasn’t as formal as the night you saw him at the bar. His jeans were black and his sweater a bright cobalt; a color that allowed him to be the center of attention when he wasn’t asking for it.
You were the one to ask him to meet - or rather Chaeryoung was - but you didn’t consider what you’d talk about.
He came back with your usual and his usual, which was an iced americano. At least he, too, was consistent, and that hadn’t changed.
“Busy at work?” he asked, clearly not sure what to talk about, either.
“Yeah. Always busy, sadly.”
“You weren’t kidding when you said your hours would be long.”
“No,” you confirmed, “I wasn’t. What about you? What’s your work day like as the city’s coolest restaurateur?”
“You flatter me. I work at ‘RED LIGHT’ during the day, and head to ‘DAHLIA’ at night.”
You tried to estimate his work hours in your head. “Back-to-back?”
“Yup.”
“Everyday?”
“Kind of. If it’s slow on like, a Monday or Tuesday, I’ll head out early and let the closers handle it. Otherwise, my day off is whenever I feel like it, but it’s not a real day-off. I use those days to answer emails and organize the budget or the inventory. Takes every waking moment to run a restaurant or bar, you know?”
“I don’t know. How do you balance everything?”
“Well, I love my job. It’s hard, but I don’t find it draining. I guess that helps. I don’t mind waking up at five in the morning, working, and going to sleep, at least not yet. I’m sure I’ll hit a wall someday, but I’m doing my best to not let that happen.”
You’re afraid to ask the next question. “How do you balance your relationship with Karina when you’re so busy?”
“Phone calls, Facetime, designated nights for dates, surprise visits, little gifts and flowers here and there,” he nodded, looking at the table. “It’s hard, but we’re trying. That’s what’s important.”
Your coffee’s bitter and you didn’t want to bother with it after a couple of sips, but you keep at it to keep your lips occupied and to hide the way your teeth grit at the underlying accusation. “That takes a lot of patience. Some people struggle with that.”
He caught your drift and it appeared he realized he deserved that. “And you? Seeing anyone?”
“No.”
“Not even casually?”
“No. Some dates here and there, but they never stick.”
“Why is that?”
“Either they’re boring, too intimidated by a strong female corporate supplicant, or I’m the problem.”
“Isn’t it -” he began but stopped himself. “Never mind.”
“Say what you mean,” you pushed light heartedly.
“Isn’t it lonely?”
It’s true that it seemed like Cupid made his way around your friend group and you were the last to get hit. When your friends came home at night, they’d be welcomed into open arms and warm bodies. You came home to snacks and warmth was in the form of a fuzzy blanket you kept on the couch. At the height of your career, you once believed that love could wait, that it would find you at the right time and you’d know right then you were ready. As Minho sat across from you picking your brain about the emptiness that came with climbing the corporate ladder, the fear of feeling incomplete was imminent.
You wouldn’t let him see that part of you.
“I like my alone time.”
“But you have so much love in your heart.” He cleared his throat, regretting the arrangement of those words when he saw how your face twisted. What would he know about what’s in your heart? “Who do you give your affections to?”
“Must it be romantic?” you retorted. “My love is given to those you saw on my birthday.”
“I guess not. You’ve always been a romantic, though.”
“Five years is more than enough time to change who I was the last time you saw me.”
“Is that change good?” he asked nervously.
‘Is the result of feeling loveless from rejection and isolation a good change? Are you an idiot?’ you wanted to ask. But that would put the blame on him and blaming him meant acknowledging how much he affected you after all these years.
“Is that change good,” you repeated thoughtfully. “Neutral.”
“Neutral?”
“I think the decision we made five years ago put us where we are today; we’re both successful young adults thriving in a beautiful city. But I lost you as a result. So, the good must come with some bad. That’s neutral, no?”
His lips formed a smile, but again, it did not travel to his eyes. “You know, I was scared to come here today.”
“I’m not that terrifying, am I?”
“At first I thought, ‘wow, Chaeryoung did not try hard to pretend to be you at all.’”
You giggled. “No; no, she didn’t.”
“And then I thought, ‘we’ll be in public. She won’t kill me in front of people, right?’”
“Kill you!”
“But I know that wouldn’t have stopped you either way,” he grinned. “You haven’t killed me yet. Is it crazy of me to think of this as a good sign?”
“A sign! Is there something you’re looking to gain out of this meeting?” you teased.
“Yes,” he admitted, “a friend.”
Your mouth hung open slightly, unsure of what to say, but your face twisted in a way that mimicked your thoughts. “A friend?”
“I know you and I have said and done some unkind things back then that we may not be able to forgive each other for, but after seeing you on your birthday, I couldn’t stop thinking of you. You may not believe me, but I miss you.”
Your head and your heart were in conflict. You had spent all this time trying not to miss him. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, unwilling to say the truth. “I… I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t be. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you all of a sudden. But… do you think it’s possible? That we could be friends again?”
How quickly would you lose him a second time? “I think we shouldn’t force it.”
“Friendships bloom naturally, of course.”
A flash of pink blurred your peripherals before it became the center of your attention. Karina held a finger to her lips as she approached Minho from behind, covering his eyes with her slender fingers. He took her hand and kissed it, leaning back to look at his glittering diamond with hearts in his eyes. They were a beautiful couple and it was as clear as day how much they adored each other. Witnessing love was supposed to be like looking at a garden of roses, but as you sat across in a front-row seat, you thought to yourself how much you disliked the smell of roses, anyway.
“Hi!” she greeted happily. “Sorry to interrupt, but we have lunch plans.”
You shook your head, dismissing the tightness in your gut. “No, please interrupt. I’m sorry for keeping him.”
“Would you like to join?”
You would rather jump off the roof of your fifty-floor office building. “Thank you, but I made plans with my co-workers already.”
“Then, we’ll have to get dinner some time!”
It pained you how much you disliked her. She didn’t deserve it. “Dinner some time sounds great.”
As Minho got up to leave, he leaned over the table and in a hushed tone said, “I just want you to know that you still cannot hide your feelings on your face.”
“My boss thinks it’s my killing charm.”
“That’s one way to put it.”
Minho’s wink was like a button that set off every alarm in your body. As he walked away, hand-in-hand with the love of his life, you tortured yourself watching them recede until they rounded the corner.
Unfortunately, it was common workplace etiquette to have drinks with your coworkers after hours now that your schedules had slowed down. How convenient it was that ‘DAHLIA’ was open and even more so that your coworkers were eager to go. Initially, you tried to wiggle out of going, but your close comrade Choi San wouldn’t allow it.
He slammed his veiny hand on your desk, and you jumped. “Jesus -”
“_____ _____,” he boomed, loudly announcing your government name.
“No.”
“Come on! You haven’t joined us in, like, forever!”
“Forever will continue.”
“And if I bribe you with free drinks?”
You paused typing. “I’m listening.”
“You, me, and the forty-fifth floor at ‘DAHLIA’ in ten minutes.”
“‘DAHLIA’?” you repeated. “Does it have to be that bar?”
“Mingi already called the place to reserve. Why, is it not good?”
“No, quite the opposite.”
“Then make haste, my lady!”
The whole way across the street, San had his arm around your shoulder in a tight grip, too afraid to let you slip at the slightest chance of hesitancy. The smooth skin of his forearms touched your neck and it was close enough to smell the cologne he dabbed just minutes before leaving the building, which you now realized to be on purpose.
Inside, a bunch of young corporate acolytes gathered all throughout the bar, all of whom you worked and were familiar with. Minho, though busy taking their orders, saw you and San come in. He did a double take, eyebrow twitching upwards at the arm suffocating your neck. Your lips formed the words, ‘kill me’, as San guided you forward to the line to order.
Small talk with San was never small when he easily filled you in on his latest interests and hobbies. The other women in the office who were nearby engaged with him enthusiastically. Admittedly, there were a multitude of reasons why San was popular around the office. He was intelligent, always willing to lend a helping hand, had a positive attitude even when days were long and tough, and most importantly, he was so hot that your boss had to jokingly warn him several times to tone it down. His argument was it wasn’t his fault that button-downs were tight on his back and arms.
Minho was the one to usher you forward with his index and middle fingers. 
San wrapped his arm around your shoulder again for no apparent reason. “Hello!” he greeted enthusiastically.
“Hi. _____,” he addressed to you informally.
“‘Sup, Minho,” you sighed.
“You two know each other?” San inquired. “Is that why you didn’t want to come?”
San’s only flaw was that he talked too much. Your jaw ticked. “Old friends. And no, that’s not why.”
“Oh!”
“What can I get you two?” You thought you heard ice in Minho’s voice, but you must be mistaken.
You needed something strong. “A negroni, please.”
“Double that,” San said.
Minho neither confirmed nor denied hearing the order before starting on it. Finally, you’re able to breathe easier when the weight of San’s muscly arm lets you go, confident that you wouldn’t book it out the bar. He instead turned his body to you, creating a wall and making you feel like you were under a microscope.
“Your presentation to the team yesterday was, um, amazing,” he stuttered.
Calling a weekly work presentation amazing was odd; he’s heard you lead them probably a hundred times by now. “Yeah? Thanks.”
“And the way you were able to answer all of the questions Boss Man fired at you? It’s no wonder you’re his favorite.”
“I wouldn’t say I’m his favorite.”
“Well, you’re my favorite.” As soon as those words left his lips, he pursed them together and shut his eyes. “I-I mean the team’s favorite.”
You nearly snorted, though your smile was hard to hide. “That’s… certainly an honor -”
“Two negronis,” Minho interrupted as he pushed the glasses forward.
“I got it,” San reiterated.
“Thanks. I’ll get the next one. I’ll meet you over in a bit; gonna talk to my good ol’ friend here,” you forced a grin. Like an obedient dog, San joined the others at the reserved tables.
“Wow, he’s…” Minho trailed off. “A lot.”
“Mother always said not to say mean things.”
“That was me being nice. Don’t tell me that’s your type.”
“Minho! That would be highly inappropriate workplace behavior,” you teased, though he didn’t seem amused. “Besides, what do you know about my type?”
He smirked. “I think I would know better than anyone.”
The twinge in your chest was crushing. Had Cupid returned with sturdier arrows? “Remember, things can change.”
“Did they, though?”
Why did that matter? “I’ll see you later, Minho.”
The whole night, San hovered over you like a shadow, more than he ever had before. Maybe he saw Minho as competition after your coworkers prodded for the story behind you and the hot bartender. He wouldn’t have to worry, though, as he was highly mistaken about both Minho and having interest in someone you worked with.
You would thank San in the morning for dragging you out that night because he reminded you the importance of camaraderie. It was nice to be surrounded by people who shared the same professional struggles as you and it was freeing for everyone to let their walls down. Many of your co-workers were also single and struggling, filling the bar with chatter about failed dates and competing to see who had the worst one as of late. This was the first night in a long while that you had fun, and even though the man that haunted your thoughts was less than twenty feet away, you wouldn’t let him ruin this one night out of many.
But you felt it; that burn in the back of your head like twin cigarettes had bore themselves into your skull; the piercing eyes of an onlooker who couldn’t look away from you and the buff man next to you all night. Each time you tried to catch him in the act, he had anticipated it, busying himself with a customer or peeling orange twists, and when you looked away, you’d feel it again.
Like a worm eating its way through an apple, the fire in Minho’s eyes consumed you.
‘Wya?’
On a random weeknight, Minho texted you this just as you were leaving the office. You looked around outside looking for a sniper or an inconspicuous spy but did not see anything suspicious or sensed any danger. To that, you replied with, ‘Leaving the office. Why?’
‘Don’t move.’
If you weren’t panicking before, you were now. Then, from around the alley where ‘DAHLIA’ was, Minho popped up with a tote bag on his arm and an apron slung over his shoulder. He waved and flashed his feline smile, unaware of how cryptic his texts were.
“You didn’t literally have to not move,” he teased.
“Maybe you should normalize giving context.”
“Context is: do you have dinner plans tonight?”
Your plan was to pick up grocery store sushi and binge watch TV, if you’d call that a plan. “Not really. Why?”
He gestured to his tote bag. “I was going to my test kitchen. Do you want to be my guinea pig?”
You considered saying no, but free food was involved. Plus, this is what friends would do, right? “Where’s this test kitchen of yours?”
“In my townhome. ‘Test kitchen’ just sounds cooler.”
The train ride to Minho’s place was the same distance as yours, just in the opposite direction. There wasn’t a ‘nice’ or a ‘bad’ side of the city, but you definitely wouldn’t classify this as the ‘bad’ side. Rows and rows of townhomes occupied endless streets in this neighborhood and each one had its own charm. Minho’s was right in the middle and the reddest, brickiest one on the block while the others had conformed to a more modern grey stucco-style.
The inside was anything but traditional though, with touches of modern style and technology. The first floor was similar to your loft, with an open floor plan combining the kitchen and living room meant for a true host and entertainer. The kitchen, of course, was the most updated, with a fancy six-burner stove, a magnetic display of different knives, and a giant white-granite island.
Soonie, Doongie, and Dori greeted Minho first by rubbing up against his calves and then greeted you second, unaware of the time that passed and recognizing your scent like you were only gone on a short trip.
You gasped happily, scratching their little heads and ears. “My fat ‘n furry step-children!”
“Looks like they missed you,” Minho chuckled.
“Oh, I missed you, too!” you cooed. “Can I help with any prep?”
“Can you help wash the produce?”
“Yes, chef.”
You tried not to stare too long at Minho while he tied the apron around his waist and rolled up his sleeves. There were vegetables in his tote bag you’ve never seen before, like the bulbous onion-like thing that smelled of licorice and a variation of a mushroom that looked like it would turn you into a zombie.
“Everything’s a vegetable or a fruit,” you noted.
“I’m attempting some vegetarian and vegan options outside of a salad and some dessert. If it doesn’t work out, the Thai place down the street is really good.”
Minho instructed you to cut vegetables in ways that you didn’t even know had a name to the technique. You had to tell him to talk to you like a five-year-old because you were not someone who knew what it meant to julienne a carrot or prepare the mise en place.
The first dish was a seared cabbage wedge. Cut the head into wedges; sear on the pan; make a soy-sugar-rice-vinegar saucy thing; shave a potato and toast it like a breadcrumb; retrieve the soy-and-smoke-cured egg yolk and… shave it?
“What do you mean ‘shave it’?” you muttered, holding the hardened yellow orb of congealed something in one hand and a sharp sword-like thingamabob in the other. “Isn’t it going to burst?”
Minho, bless his heart, stood behind you and guided your hands together. His hands, despite going through hundreds of washes and touching all things hot and cold, were soft and warm on top of yours. He had you shave one quarter of the solid egg yolk over the dressed cabbage wedge.
“The yolk is cured, so it’s solid all the way through,” he said.
His breath tickled the shell of your ear and it turned hot. Was the oven set to a thousand degrees? “O-Oh! Wow, that’s cool. Is it done?”
It was only then that Minho released his hold. “Yup. Try it.”
Cooking was a hidden form of sorcery. It was one of the most complex and delicious dishes you’ve ever eaten. Salty from the potato breadcrumb, savory from the egg yolk, and sweet from the soy sauce, feeling different textures and flavors so good you had to stop yourself from moaning.
“Good?” he asked. All you could do was nod vigorously with eyes wide and glittering. He smiled genuinely and his eyes sparkled, too. He opened his mouth and said, “Ah~”
That was your cue to feed him a bite. You gathered the perfect amount of everything onto a fork for him. As he chewed, his brows knitted together thoughtfully and you’re unsure of what that expression meant. From his pocket, he took out a small field notes book and scribbled something quickly.
“You don’t like it?”
He shook his head. “No, I like it a lot.”
“Why is your face like that?”
“What’s wrong with my face?”
“You look so angry.”
“That’s just how my face looks.”
Next was a vegetarian bone marrow. Nothing about bones or marrows sounded remotely vegetarian, but Minho handed you two fat king oyster mushrooms to halve and remove the centers while he sautéed a medley of other mushrooms in salted butter, garlic, and thyme. There was a comfortable silence in the kitchen as you both worked. Nothing felt awkward, or forced, or as bitter as your last meetings were.
As you waited for Minho’s further instructions, you toured the living space and observed all the pictures. You were in about half of them. Most were of your entire friend group, but many were significant moments in your lives, like graduation, birthdays, talent shows, or candid solo pictures. After all these years, when you kept any evidence of him hidden in a shoe box in your closet, he displayed you loud and proud. You glossed over the number of pictures of Karina for your own sake but seeing her face that many times made you stop looking.
When you turned back, Minho was staring at you so intently, he forgot to pretend he wasn’t watching.
“What is it?” you asked.
“Nothing,” he cleared his throat. “Um, the next step is ready.”
Under an immersive blender (“Immersion blender, silly.”) was the sautéed medley and the guts of the king oyster mushroom, softened cream cheese, and olive oil. The paste was bagged and piped back into the charred and seasoned center of the cut-out king oyster mushroom. With a flame torch, Minho darkened the paste, creating a bruleed outer layer, and topped it off with pink peppercorns, pecorino, and chives. Triangles of buttered toast were the vehicle.
Minho took a spoon and scooped out the center. “A little bit of ‘marrow’ and voila. And the ‘bone’ is edible, too, obviously.”
Your eyes teared up at the fireworks of umami. “Will you cater for my next birthday?”
“For you, I will.”
After course upon course of seared and leafy bites of savory and salty goodness, you greenlit practically all of them to Minho’s dismay (“Guinea pig means to critique, not suck up to.”). Dessert was the final leg of courses. From preserved lemon sorbets to chocolatey bites of flourless cake, you would fall into a deep sleep tonight on a cloud of spun sugar.
“I’m drunk on life,” you sighed happily.
“I like you best that way.”
“Seriously, Minho, you have something really good here. I’m no expert, but I think –”
“Wait!” he interrupted. “Chocolate on your lip.”
“Huh? Here?” you licked once.
“Not even close.”
“Here?”
“No.”
“Where’s a napkin?”
“Hold still, will you?”
Minho held your chin between his thumb and index finger and tilted up. Like a surgeon, he meticulously wiped away all evidence of your inner chocolate-devouring goblin with his other thumb. For a moment, he lowered his hand to wipe it on his apron, but he caught you looking at his lips.
“Th-Thanks,” you whispered.
He took the chocolate-covered thumb and sucked it clean, maintaining his gaze before it lowered. “My pleasure.”
The kitchen felt hot and it was hard to breathe. The alarms in your head went off again; the longer you stayed, the faster you’d fall. “I-I should go.”
“Wait –”
“This was great by the way!” you called as you backed up towards the door. “S-So good! And thank you, I will pay you back for any groceries!”
“That’s not necessary, I invited you here.”
“Let me know what you decide to add to the menu, and I’ll-I’ll stop by some time, yeah?”
You didn’t give him the opportunity to answer before running out the door.
The following weeks after your inappropriately intimate tasting, you avoided Minho as long as you could. It hadn’t even been a month since you saw him for the first time and you already crossed the thin line that was never meant to be crossed. You couldn’t even be strong for that long before you fell back into the routine of desiring the one man you weren’t allowed to have.
This was the curse of Cupid. He had successfully shot and landed an arrow into every friend you loved, pairing them up with their person and the match-up was so right it was scary. Somehow, at the perfect time under the correct circumstances, your friends found the ones that completed their other half, or so they said, and you witnessed love in full bloom every time it happened and everyday since. When it was shoved in your face like that, how could you not think about what you were missing out on every single day of your life?
You used to think considering a couple as two halves was a disservice to humanity. Halves implied that part of you was missing; it suggested that one could never be whole alone, that they spend their whole lives finding someone who fit the two-piece puzzle. A two piece puzzle was supposed to be the easiest puzzle in the world, but in a box filled with over eight billion pieces, it would take forever for Cupid to pair the pieces. At twenty-five, after that stormy night, you once believed that you could survive as one single piece among the eight billion for the rest of your life at the bottom of the pieces pile, if it came to it; but now that you’re the last of the friend group to yet find your match - at thirty, at that - maybe Cupid had a point to the whole two halves make a whole argument.
Because admittedly, as much as you tried to convince yourself on your thirtieth birthday, you didn’t feel whole. Hell, you barely felt like half; and every time you saw Minho, bits of you were being chipped off to the point that you were scared of losing your half of the puzzle.
To distract yourself from thinking about Minho licking chocolate from your lips, you finally jumped the gun and downloaded dating apps for the first time. Well, Chaeryoung and Jisung did.
“Put on your bathing suit,” she ordered.
“Excuse you.”
“What? All your selfies are so normal!”
“Normal is a good thing, Chaer.”
“But it’s not,” Jisung piped in. “Dating is not what it used to be. Before, it was as simple as looking pretty, saying your favorite song or movie, and naming the restaurant you want your first date to be at. Now, you have to get personal. Name a niche hobby, what character from a TV show represents you the most, what childhood trauma affected your frontal lobe development -”
“Ok, I get it.”
Jisung and Chaeryoung sandwiched you tightly on the couch even though the view of the tablet was easily seen. Chaeryoung filled in all the prompts for you a little too enthusiastically while Jisung was there to judge through the lens of the male gaze and snacks.
The woman beside you cackled evilly. “This is so much fun! I can’t believe you’re finally doing this. Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for this moment?”
“Seriously. What man made you do this?” Jisung teased.
You yanked the tablet back. “No one.”
“Liar.”
“Who do you think, Han?” Chaeryoung stated bluntly. “Who else could have brought this blessing upon us?”
“Oh,” he mused, “duh.”
“Shut up, both of you! No one made me do this. Am I not worthy of finding love?”
“Of course you are. Just not this way.”
“Why not this way?”
“Just watch.”
The second someone completes their profile, it’s like the app forces it at the top of everyone’s algorithm. You received a lot of interest and private messages in the first five minutes, many of which were… bold…
“Men are so uncouth,” you groaned. “Is sex all you think about?”
“Yeah,” Jisung shrugged, pointing to his head and then his groin. “Two heads, two brains.”
“Ugh, gross.”
Chaeryoung swiped left at lightning speed. “Too young, too old, too short, too tall, too smart –”
“I like smart,” you pouted.
“The key to a healthy relationship is to be smarter than them.” Jisung didn’t argue, as he was happily committed to his intelligent partner (a mystery to all, as no one knew how he bagged a research fellow).
There’s a knock on your door. The three of you look at each other in confusion.
“You two need to stop secretly inviting strange men to my home,” you accused before getting up.
“I didn’t tell anyone,” Jisung defended, “did you?” Chaeryoung denied.
When you opened the door, a disheveled Minho stood there with an oily bag in his hands. He raised a brow. “Am I that strange?”
Just as you were trying to trust in the dating app algorithm, the Gods and Cupid said, ‘let there be chaos!’ “You, specifically? A little bit.”
“Ha ha,” he drawled. “Am I interrupting something?”
“Yeah!” Jisung called from the couch. “This is girl time, Min!”
“Shut up!” Chaeryoung pulled Jisung up from the couch and they both patted your head before rushing out the door. “We’ll see you later, _____!”
“Y-You don’t have to leave!” you practically begged.
“Honey, it’s past-nine on a weekday, yes we do!”
“I didn’t realize the time,” Minho frowned, looking at his watch. “I was nearby with Hyunjin and thought I’d stop by with some fries to make up for Chaeryoung tossing them out on your birthday.”
You don’t even remember that happening. “That’s so nice of you.”
“I can come back another time.”
“No!” you said an octave too high. “No, please come in!”
Minho’s outfit was more casual than ‘DAHLIA’s typical button down and tight slacks and you deduced he was working at ‘RED LIGHT’ today. There were multiple oil and/or beer stains on his shirt and his hair was parted and pointing in different directions, evidence of his hand having to go through it several dozen times out of stress.
“You look…”
“I know,” he sighed, plopping the bag on the table. “There was a work-lunch event today that turned into dinner for some corporate slugs. Then, Hyunjin was looking at a location for his coffee excursion and asked for my help. Four hours later, I’m starving and thought of you.”
He was thinking of you a lot lately, it seemed, and it was hard to deny that you reciprocated. “This is wonderful, thank you. I owe you two dinners now.”
“You don’t ‘owe’ me anything. Friends don’t owe; they treat.”
“My treat next time, then.”
“And the next,” he reminded with a smirk. “What were you girlies doing just now?”
“Um,” you hesitated, cheeks stuffed with potato. “Making me a dating profile.”
He raised a brow in the same way when he saw you walking in with San: questioning and dissatisfied. “You never had one before?”
“I was on-and-off when I first moved here, but I couldn’t stand to open the apps after a couple days of usage.”
He does the thing with his fingers when he gestures to come close. You noticed his hands were veinier now than when you were younger.
“Let me see.”
“Let you see my dating profile?” He nodded. “Absolutely not.”
“C’mon, I’ll give you an opinion through the male gaze.”
“Why do you think Jisung was here?”
“Certainly not that.”
Defeated, you handed him your phone with the app open. There’s a twinkle of curiosity wondering how he’d react, but you wanted to tame that fire quickly. He scrolled and swiped, then scrolled, and scrolled, and scrolled.
His face was stern when he said, “You already have a lot of admirers.”
“Isn’t that a good thing?”
He didn’t answer and continued to scroll. “What about that guy you work with?”
“San? What about him?”
“Nothing came of it?”
“Didn’t I tell you that would be inappropriate?”
“Is that the only reason stopping you?”
You squint your eyes at your all too curious friend who hadn’t looked up from your phone since taking it. He popped fries in his mouth rhythmically like a metronome until he caught the heat from your gaze. He looked up and did a double take.
“Hm?” he asked.
“Why are you so curious?”
“So, there’s another reason stopping you?”
“And if there is?”
“And if there is…” he repeated, fiddling with your phone charm. “Would you tell me?”
The inkling of assumption tickled annoyingly at the corners of your mind. Was he asking to let you know that he knew he was the reason for your desires? Or was he asking to tease you, to prove to you that if you had made the right decision all those years ago, you could have been in Karina’s position? That all this time you spent away from him, your journey for companionship started too late. And sure, your bank account was as filled as your stomach, but was it worth it when you had no one to share it with?
He waited patiently for your answer, but you heard his foot tapping rapidly on the wood. Your mouth opened, then closed, and you finally shook your head in shame, because your lips were cursed to speak the truth or nothing at all and you would rather deny than to admit.
He licked his lips, and that gesture alone sparked something in your core. Then he nodded in a way that expressed sourness, as if this confirmation was exactly what he expected but not what he was hoping in both the nonverbal response and the underlying tone that trailed behind it.
You broke the silence. “How’s Karina?”
“Good.” He was quick to shake his head. “Actually, I don’t know. I haven’t seen her since lunch a month ago.”
“Why’s that?”
“I’ve… been too busy.”
Shameful and embarrassed, was what you gathered from his response. As he should; to criticize your decision only to repeat the cycle when he found fulfillment in his career was so… Hypocritical was not a strong enough word. Betrayal, perhaps, was the most correct, but that didn’t satisfy you, either.
You wouldn’t get satisfaction from any angle, though. No matter how you viewed it, it was selfish to consider yourself relevant here. Minho was hurting; everything you feared about relationships had flowered before him and crushed the idea that perfection could be achieved as long as both people tried. But it seemed that although he tried, it wasn’t enough, and maybe his ideals were more out of the ordinary than he anticipated.
“It’s put a bit of a strain on our relationship. She wants to settle down and I… I thought I did, too, but… you know, my places have been growing so much, and…”
As he trailed off and off through a list of excuses, it took you all the way back to the night that it rained. You also spat excuses from your pockets and got nowhere. Now, Minho was on your side, but it didn’t feel great, either.
“What’s more important to you?” you asked.
That was the age-old dilemma, wasn’t it? What was most important to someone as an adult who spent most of their life getting educated and preparing for the professional world to milk money from consumers; the career they adored and earned or the love they found along the way? One could argue they could live without love, but could one live with themselves if they gave up their dream? How many rom-coms have you and Minho laughed at where the world that movie was set in was in a vacuum and the couple always chose each other? Though the plot was fake, the dilemma was real, and the choices they made in the movies were just not realistic.
“Important,” he chuckled, understanding what you were getting at. “Why can’t both be important to me?”
“They can, but it’s clear your efforts are imbalanced in one direction. Otherwise, we would not be having this conversation.”
The fries were long gone. Minho stood up and tossed the bag in the trash before grabbing the unfinished bottle of wine leftover from your birthday and two glasses. You supposed tonight would be the most appropriate night to finish it off. Plus, Minho needed it, apparently.
“I tried, you know,” he sighed, “I really did. I text every night; I send her flowers to her office; I cook for her, shower her with gifts, and tell her regularly that I-I…”
Minho didn’t complete his thought, but you knew what he meant to say. Why would he not, for your sake? “That you love her?”
“Yeah. That I loved her.” Your glasses raised in sync. “I get it. I’m not as present, and I get her love language is quality time, but when did the thought stop counting?”
“Have you considered you two aren’t compatible?”
“Anyone can be compatible, no? Where’s the effort?”
Now you were feeling annoyed. Were these digs subconsciously at you? “Effort can only go so far. You said her love language is quality time. You could do everything in between, but you’re not there to hold her, to kiss her, to tangle under the bed sheets as much as she wants, then guess what? She’s never going to feel the love that she wants and deserves.”
“What about me? What about what I want?”
“I don’t know what you want. Does she? Do you?”
Minho chugged the rest of the cabernet in his glass, nose wrinkling, before pouring in more with a heavy hand. You ignored how cute his nose looked. “I don’t know what I want.”
“Ok, so you can’t complain is what I’m hearing.”
A chuckle huffed through his nose, annoyed that someone who he confided in didn’t feed into his fantasy that his ideology was gospel.
“Ahh!” he groaned loudly to the ceiling. “Fucking hell. I thought this was supposed to get easier when we were older?”
“What? Love?” you scoffed. “Look at us; I’m stuck on the apps and you’re stuck in your ways. You think this gets easier just because we have more ‘life experience’?” Your air quotes were overly exaggerated. “No, dude. People are dumb at every age.”
“I’m not dumb,” he pouted.
“You’re a little dumb.”
He giggled a bit and it traveled down his belly to a full laugh. You couldn’t help but smile, too, which grew into your own fit of laughs, and the condo was filled with ugly laughs and tears of joy, pain, and all that was locked inside your’s and Minho’s souls since inception. These nights were the ones you once looked forward to.
When the giggles died down, he stared blankly at the swirling wine in the glass and asked, “Do you think we could have worked out?”
You felt your cheeks and nose flare brightly. “Worked out? Like if we tried?”
In some other tangential timeline, Minho moved to the city. Maybe he still bought out ‘RED LIGHT’, and you would visit him everyday after work and bring your coworkers in to show off your hot bartender boyfriend. Then, you’d take the train home together. You’d wind down on the couch watching a couple episodes of something light and crawl into bed in each other’s arms. Your lips would never leave his unless it was to come up for air, arms wrapped around his naked torso as he crawled on top, and mumbling praises and poems of how much you adored him.
Like an asteroid that orbits a planet, you revolve your life around him and his happiness. If you tried long distance or if you gave up your career, it would be a difficult feat, and happiness would not be found in that desert. Leaving for the city was for the best. He eventually found his oasis, and you were still on the long journey of finding yours in between the infinite dunes.
Before you realized, your nose burned some more and your vision blurred. “I think it still would have been really hard.”
“Would it have been worth it?”
“I think…” you hesitated, but the wine in your veins was overtaking, “it would only have been worth it if it was with you.”
“Then, why?” he begged. “What happened to ‘it’s better to have loved and lost’?”
“After all this time, you still can’t see what I see. I never want to risk something where I would lose you. So, I didn’t think I’d lose you if I said no.”
“This is… so stupid…”
“Don’t insult me in my home.”
“No, I… I…” he stuttered, and it’s just now you see his eyes were glossy, too. “I can’t stop thinking about you, and it’s so fucking stupid.”
It was stupid; you moved out to move on, and here he was at your door bringing you french fries and opening bars across from where you work, invading your life like a decade-old infectious disease with no ailment known to man-kind. It was stupid; he was taken, spitting out confessions of his failing love story to the one he ended, telling you he still thinks of you before he sleeps. It was very stupid, and it pained you not to fall for it.
You shook your head. “Don’t.”
“______ -”
“You can’t think of me.”
He reached out across the table to take your hands. You allowed it, because you were a weak, weak woman, starving for touch and hungry for him. His skin was rough and tired from the dehydrating soaps of the service industry, but they felt so right.
“Tell me you don’t think of me,” he demanded. “Tell me, and I’ll leave.”
“What does it mean for you to leave? You will leave my home, and then what? Will you try to be better for her? You’ll stay in my life and we can be friends? Or will you leave permanently and change the dynamic of our friend group forever for the second time?” By now, the tears were falling and words choked as they came out, but your grip on him betrayed you and you held on like he was hanging off a cliff.
“I… The… The former…”
“Then, no. No, I don’t think of you. I’m not tormented by you, I’m not in ruins when I see you, I don’t smell you on my clothes, I don’t see you when I close my eyes, or in stranger’s faces when they pass, I don’t dream of you, and I definitely don’t think of you every second of everyday!”
“You can’t even convince yourself anymore. Why won’t you be vulnerable with me?”
“Vulnerability is weakness, Minho! I have been strong for so long; without you, at that!” your voice was shrill and loud and you couldn't be bothered to sit. You were up from your chair, leaning over the table, and he winced as you kept going. “You come here, turn my life upside down, and ask me to be vulnerable? To lower my guard around you? After you abandoned me all because the circumstances weren’t right at that moment? Fuck you.”
He got up from the table to get to you and towered over you, torso much wider than you remembered. He was too close, and you could feel him feel you. Your body hadn’t turned to face him, too scared to face your biggest fear, so he forced it upon you by holding your shoulders. His eyes, so big and brown that it was easy to drown in them, dug deep into yours and pleaded with everything he had in his heart.
“Fine, don’t be vulnerable, but show yourself some mercy, for fuck’s sake.”
“Mercy? I want someone I can’t have. How does that merit mercy?”
He faltered a bit and you regretted the moment you invited him in. His eyebrows furrowed in what you thought was pity. Your head dropped in shame; that was the last thing you needed. His hands moved to hold your face as if he never wanted you to drop something so precious to him ever again.
“Don’t,” you repeated.
His forehead connected with yours and suddenly, you felt young again. It’s what you needed, what you wanted, but…
“I want to kiss you.”
The rush from five years ago hit you like a truck. “I want to kiss you, too.”
Every emotion, every desire, collided into the kiss. His hands swiftly moved to your waist and pulled you in until every millimeter of you touched some part of him and soon your hands were lost in his hair. His lips were soft, and you always imagined them to feel like petals of a tulip, but he was earnest and there was some pain in the amount of pressure he pressed into you. The pain felt good, the feeling of being wanted made your heart soar, and you two exchanged gasps and moans as your lips moved fervently, hungry for indulgence after being teased with temptation. But his tongue tasted sour, and bitter, and nothing like the coffee and chocolate you once dreamed of, because this circumstance was yet again not right. He tasted like rotting fruit because stolen fruit was never sweet.
You broke away, gasping and sniffling and it was so hard to breathe. “You’re not mine,” you cried.
“But you have always been mine,” he whispered, with his breath ghosting your lips.
You shook your head, over and over until you freed yourself from his grip, wishing you’d be free of him forever. You turned your back to him, unable to show your face as you said, “I think you should leave.”
Back then, you wished he fought for you as much as he wished you to do the same. You wished he’d followed you, or waited for you until the time was right, but of course time didn’t wait for anyone. Deep down, as you broke into pieces in your dining room, you hoped he’d fight for you then, too, and proclaim that his heart belonged to only you. You were fooled twice, and as the saying goes, shame on you.
The failure of reciprocity would weigh you down just as much. You never fought for him the way you wished he would for you for the simple fact that you weren’t allowed to. He was a taken man, a man who said not too long ago how he told her he loved her every single night, and it would destroy you how he’d go home later and still say those words.
You believed everyone was worthy of love, including you. The love you wanted wasn’t supposed to feel tainted or spoiled. No matter how much you wanted him, how much he claimed he wanted you from the very start, you wouldn’t be that kind of woman who stole someone’s man, and therefore you would not confess to anything else that lay hidden away in your heart.
Minho left quietly. The battle was over, and you broke down on the floor.
Heavy and loud sobs escaped your quivering lips in a poor attempt to dissipate the pain that expanded in your chest. Your cries echoed into the open loft until you couldn’t stand the sound of your voice and wasting tissues, but your body wouldn’t let up. So, you transferred yourself to the bathroom, running a hot shower and curling up on the tile until the water ran cold. Here, your cries were muffled by the artificial rain, just as you had cried into the storm that ugly night long ago.
You called in sick the following day.
For the next quarter, you were happy you were swamped with work, for once. That meant waking up early, taking the train when the sun had barely risen, and leaving when it had long gone to sleep. It was the same for most people in the office and you were blessed with not having to conjure up a lie to get away from San’s advances to get you to happy hour.
In sum, you hoped it meant you’d be too busy to think of him, but when you had only a single moment, a single second of freedom, he invaded every bit of you. He was a virus, a parasite, sucking the life out of you like he was reminding you what you desired that once was within arms reach was now lost forever. Like Icarus, you fell from the ether into despair, surrounded by darkness from the absence of the sun in your only moments outside of the office. On days when you were off, you had begged your boss to let you come in, to distract you with some enrichment of any stupid task even if it meant gluing together inadvertently shredded proprietary documents for sixteen hours, but HR would catch on too quickly, was what he said.
You hoped to fall hopelessly in this troposphere of purgatory forever, operating through the days on autopilot, but your heart had sunk to your gut and it ached to land on the earth to end the pain. Just as you were getting the hang of flowing with the wind, Minho called once. Then, he called twice. On the third, you almost answered, but when your eyes welled and you struggled to breathe, you figured it was your body’s reaction to falling faster and further beneath the clouds. You spent those nights he called curled up in some corner of your home under a multitude of blankets waiting for the headache and heartache to subside, but by then the night turned to dawn and time was limited.
Chaeryoung would call, too; she’d text; she’d send you food, coffee, and chocolates, and much of it went cold because any sight of food made you nauseous. Lately, you moved so slow that sustenance wasn’t a necessity anymore, nor was it a pleasure. She was always quite the worrywart, so you tried to answer as much and as vaguely as you could, but at one point it was too exhausting to keep up the lie and you gave up, leaving her with one-worded answers that didn’t satisfy either party.
And so you continued to fall; continued to cry, rot, and falter when all you had done was taste forbidden fruit.
His birthday approached faster than you could get over him.
For a while, no one seemed to mind your absence besides Chaeryoung and Minho, who had called to see if you were attending any of the last-minute get-togethers or planned reservations in the recent month. The one big one you regretted missing was Chan’s birthday, who was rightfully miffed, but you hoped the gift you shipped would make up for it. You kept up with social media, though, and liked all the pictures that came from those nights. 
Each post, you’d look for him. You’d admire what he was wearing; you’d wonder what cologne he was wearing; you’d imagine the way his eyes lit up when Karina walked in the room. But she wasn’t in any of the photos.
You didn’t tell anyone what transpired the second time with Minho. It was too embarrassing to have fallen for him twice, which sent feminism back at least a decade. You were going to conjure up some work-related lie to get out of his birthday celebration, but Chaeryoung wouldn’t allow it and even went as far as messaging San for confirmation about your work schedule.
In a huff, she busted through to your home before you could reject her kindness. Normally, your girl was all smiles and full of expressions, but tonight she was strict and stern, which meant she was mad. Very mad.
“I need you to not message my coworkers, please,” you said as she filtered through your closet. “I don’t want a meeting with HR on Monday.”
She didn’t turn to face you when she snapped, “It felt like you were lying, so I had to double check.”
“I wasn’t lying. It was busy, but we just lightened up after the deadline yesterday.”
“So, why couldn’t you tell me that?”
“I needed an excuse to not go tonight.”
She shook her head, clearly frustrated with how insufferable you were being. She turned to you with glossy eyes and you regretted avoiding her lately. “Aren’t I your friend?”
Her having to ask really stung. “You’re my best friend.”
“Then can’t you tell me why you disappeared for three months?”
“I… it’s hard, Chaer…”
“For God’s sake, _____, you’re thirty. Act like it, and use your words!”
“I can’t,” your voice cracked, “I can’t see Minho.”
Her face softened, realizing maybe that night when she left you with someone you saw as a stranger was not what a best friend did. You watched her scan through your slumped posture and sunken eyes before she lunged and hugged you tightly. Tears burned, the feeling of gentle humanity fulfilling your highest hierarchy of needs overflowing all your emotions.
“What happened?” she whispered.
“We kissed,” you whispered back.
“And?”
“I kissed back.”
“But?”
“He’s not mine.”
She pushed you to arms length, eyes knitting sternly. “I think you should go tonight.”
“Chaer -”
“Trust me. You might regret it. It’s his thirtieth, after all.” She pushed away the hairs that cling to your forehead before running to grab some make up. “Let me do your make-up! It’ll be like your twenty-first all over again.”
She sat you down on your bed and began to dab away at the color-correcting pallet. A box of tissues lay next to her so she could catch the tears before they fell. She created a large pile in the end.
“Do you want him to be yours?” she asked after a long moment of silence.
You wanted to smell him on your clothes, adore him in your dreams, and wake up next to him. You want him to be yours, only yours, and to not have to share him with someone who he also chose. Under this sanguine circumstance, still, you smiled at this very thought, because of course the answer was, “Yes.”
And she, too smiled, her own tears forming while she dabbed yours with another fist full of tissues. “Then, go to him.”
“But -”
“_____,” she breathed sternly, sniffling a bit. “You stupid, stupid people-pleaser. Fight for yourself, for once.”
When you thought the battle was long over, little did you know you were still fighting all this time.
Despite trying not to think of him, as his birthday approached, the calendar terrorized you to get him a gift. Just in case, you know? It was a fancy Nakiri knife whose steel was decorated in waves. The Internet told you that a chef’s knife was similar to that of a samurai’s sword, so only the highest quality of Damascus steel was preferred. As you held the box in your hand at his front steps, your mind and heart kept battling with each other and debated whether or not getting a personal gift was too intimate versus a gift card to some generic restaurant to establish a boundary.
But wasn’t the boundary already too blurry, anyways?
Chaeryoung pushed you inside the already-unlocked door. All the boys and their partners and Chaeryoung’s now-official real man were already there surrounding the island. Minho, who just had a grin on, dropped it quickly upon seeing you come in and straightened his back. It’s like deja vu from your birthday.
Karina wasn't present.
Your body’s instinct was to turn and run out the door, but Chaeryoung anticipated your every move and was quick to block you. She squeezed your hand and tugged you further inside. You greeted the boys and their partners first, who all said a variation of, ‘long time, no see,’ before reaching Minho. His expression was still starstruck and confused. He didn’t appear angry. Perhaps it was a feeling worse than that, which could not be translated through his face.
With sweaty hands, you handed him the small rectangular box. “Happy birthday.”
He was hesitant to take it, as if to question the possibility of diffusion of poison through the skin. His hesitancy allowed you to get a whiff of his bourbon vanilla cologne. “Thank you.”
“Oh, so you’ll come for Minho’s birthday, but not mine?” Chan pouted.
“Some things are worth coming out for,” you retorted.
The night went on and you played your role as an onlooker in the background, hoping to blend in with the walls and remain unnoticed so as to not ruin the night. You watched him and the boys shove each other playfully and inhale any and all food Minho made. Who’s to say that thirty was old when the epitome of youth was in the souls of a group of hungry boys? Conversations and debates picked up from when they last saw each other. Some of them filled you in and others forced you to answer without knowing the majority opinion. Laughs and giggles filled the kitchen and even when it seemed that Minho didn’t want to whenever you answered, he couldn’t help himself from smiling at your ridiculous answers, though he stopped when he’d catch you watching him.
As the clock ticked forward, your anticipation for Karina to pop in at any moment dwindled. Maybe she was also having a rough quarter three and taking a late night at the office, but to miss her boyfriend’s thirtieth was… a choice, even if they were fighting or some other strange reason. But then four hours turned to six hours and then it was, ‘damn, it’s already 2:00 AM?’ and she never came.
“Are you ready to go?” Chaeryoung asked at the front door.
Minho was now alone in the kitchen and there were a lot of dishes left to wash. You should help him.
“No,” you said. “I’ll call you later.”
She had a hard time hiding her grin as she left.
You approached him slowly like how you’d approach an angry cat because he was scrubbing the dishes a little too furiously. He didn’t look up despite knowing what you were up to.
“Can I help?” you asked.
Still, he refused to look at you, but he handed you the sponge. Well, that was progress, right?
Dishes and clean up were completed in silence. No chit-chat, no music, just the sound of running water and dishes clinking in the cupboards. The task was finished in good time, and just before you decided that your stay was long overdue, he pulled another deja vu card.
“What are you doing here?” he mumbled to the floor.
“It’s your thirtieth birthday. Chaeryoung told me to come.”
“You could’ve said no.”
“I could’ve.”
A salty laugh - or perhaps a scoff - was uttered. He was tired, you were tired, and the air was cold and stale. The topics orbited like a satellite, coming ‘round for another turn for a different thirtieth celebration, if either of you would even call it that.
Minho let out a big sigh. “Only you can disappear for three months and come back into open arms.”
The words arranged sounded like a compliment, but it was clearly the opposite. “I don’t expect to be forgiven.”
“No, you shouldn’t. I tried calling you.”
“I know.”
“Texting. E-mailing. Fuck, even snail mailing!”
“I know…”
He threw his hands in the air, as he did whenever he was frustrated, and turned to take a breather from your nonchalance. You were supposed to be fighting for him, not letting him slip away like this, but why was this so hard when loving him came easily?
“I shouldn’t have come over that night,” he said after returning. “I was trying too hard to be friends again and I crossed a point where I couldn’t return from.”
“Isn’t that the story of our friendship?”
“Is that how you feel?”
“We were never really just friends, were we?” you teased.
“No,” he admitted softly, “we never were.”
Your eyes met for the first time that night. His were red and puffy, and he looked like he hadn’t slept in three months.
You swallowed the rock in your throat. “Where’s Karina?”
“I don’t know. I broke up with her a while ago.”
Your chest felt tight and your voice bubbled out a garbled, “Why?”
And his mirrored, to the point where he had to clear his throat. “I don’t love her anymore.”
“So, is it true? Is it better to have loved and lost?”
“I wouldn’t exchange my days with her for anything.”
It didn’t make sense; it just didn’t. When someone loved that deeply, how could they throw that person away so easily?
“I’m sorry,” was all you could say.
“I’m not.” He cleared his throat. “I loved her and she loved me. It was fulfilling, and now it’s not. It’s just how it is.”
“Isn’t that painful?”
“If it means I get to feel like I’m flying, I think I can handle it.”
The concept, the idea of that, was just too hard to grasp. It took your wax wings melting to realize that the journey upwards was worth the descent.
“Enough about my failures,” he said hoarsely, “What about you? How… how are you doing?”
How were you supposed to admit that tonight was the first night you had a proper meal? That sleep only came under the influence of some generic-brand silver liquor? That you plucked a fist full of grey hairs the day before? Would admitting to vulnerability prove that you were fighting for this? For him? Or would it make you look pathetic?
“I’ve been doing fine.”
The centers of his brows scrunched together and his lips pursed. He inhaled heavily, his sniffles echoing through his quiet home.
“Are you?” he stuttered, voice distorted and desperate. “Really?”
No, of course not, and that much was clear when you started to cry.
“Because,” he continued, “if you can’t tell, I’m… dying on the inside.”
“Because of me?” you whispered, feeling the weight of your actions collapsing.
“Because of you. It’s always because of you. Everyday for the past ten years. It’s always been you.”
“Why couldn’t you forget me? Why? When you were the one to throw me away?”
“How!” he cried out. “How could I forget about you, when all I wanted was you?”
“You wanted to change me! You wanted me to abandon my career.” “I wanted you to try!”
“And you were right!” Sobs choked in your chest. “You were right. If I loved you, I should have fought for you. I should have tried harder. And I really shouldn’t have admitted those feelings to you when you were not mine. For everything that I’ve done, I’m so, so sorry.”
“You should be. You are so mean,” he hissed, pointing harshly. “You torture me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Even when I close my eyes, I see you.”
“I’m sorry -”
“I named my fucking bar after your favorite flower! And now you stand here in my home asking me to forget about you? How am I supposed to even begin doing that, hm? How, when everything around me reminds me of you?”
Your sobs were visceral and messy, and you buried your face in your hands. Maybe tears held the youth Ponce de Leon searched his whole life for the way yours could fill the fountain in minutes and how wiping them took away two decades of your life.
“I’m going to ask you once more,” he whispered. “One last time, and I’ll leave it be forever because I’m fucking tired. Do you think of me as often as I think of you?”
You caved in when all else went wrong and there was nothing else to hide. “Everyday.”
“Do you want me as much as I want you?”
“No,” you replied, “Because I need you. Now, let me ask you: do you want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you?”
His lips quivered before he laughed and you do, too, because that was the cringiest thing you’ve ever said. He held your face, that precious face of yours that he adored so much, dabbing away your tears. His eyes fluttered to your lips, a habit he couldn’t shake off after all these years.
“I need you to kiss me,” he demanded.
He tasted like honey and his lips fit yours like the second half of a two-piece puzzle. This was slow and deliberate, no longer going at the crushing speed of fervent passion because you had all the time in the world together now, and Minho was always the type of man to take his time. You couldn’t stand to leave his lips even for air and they ghosted his only for a few seconds before you tip-toed and pressed yourself deeper against him. Your hands were occupied with gripping his shirt at his waist to keep him in place. When you felt his smile on your lips, you grinned back and held him by his beautiful face.
“I need you to stay,” he formed on your lips.
“All I need is you,” you answered.
Even while traveling to his bedroom, both of you refused to separate as you bumped into furniture.
“We should take this slow,” he mumbled, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.
“Get acquainted with each other, or whatever,” you concurred after removing his belt.
“Maybe get coffee some time?” he asked into the crook of your neck.
“Or a drink? I know this really cute bar called ‘DAHLIA’.”
He threw you onto his bed. After removing his shirt, he crawled on top. “I think I’ve heard it.”
“Oh yeah?” You undid his pants zipper. “I know the bartender. A little narcissistic, though; he thinks he’s so hot.”
He trailed kisses down your lips, to your neck, to your sternum, to your stomach, until the top of your panties where his fingers hooked. “I know he is.”
You called Chaeryoung the next afternoon. At first, she scolded you for not texting her when you got home, but when she checked your location during the call, she screamed so loud that Minho dropped the spatula while making your breakfast.
The sanguine satellite would continue to orbit her world and revolve her life around his happiness; and he would continue to do the same.
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ikeubi · 1 day
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candles ♡̷ 심 재윤
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๛ y͟o͟u͟’͟v͟e͟ ͟n͟e͟v͟e͟r͟ ͟c͟e͟l͟e͟b͟r͟a͟t͟e͟d͟ ͟b͟i͟r͟t͟h͟d͟a͟y͟s͟ ͟b͟e͟c͟a͟u͟s͟e͟ ͟y͟o͟u͟ ͟n͟e͟v͟e͟r͟ ͟h͟a͟d͟ ͟p͟e͟o͟p͟l͟e͟ ͟t͟o͟ ͟c͟e͟l͟e͟b͟r͟a͟t͟e͟ ͟w͟i͟t͟h͟.͟ ͟a͟t͟ ͟l͟e͟a͟s͟t͟ ͟u͟n͟t͟i͟l͟ ͟j͟a͟k͟e͟ ͟c͟a͟m͟e͟ ͟i͟n͟t͟o͟ ͟y͟o͟u͟r͟ ͟l͟i͟f͟e͟.͟ ͟ ▍nonidol!jake x fmr __ fluff! established rs, non idol au. beware! slight angst if you squint
As Jake slowly woke up, a smile crept onto his face as he realized that today was a special day. Your special day.
The night before, your boyfriend decided to sleep over at your apartment as he assumed that there was an unspoken agreement that you two would be spending the next day together. So imagine the boy's shock when he turned over to face your side of the bed to find it empty──only a blue hued sticky note attached to the top of your pillow.
Jake sat up with a confused look etched upon his features as he grabbed the small piece of paper and read it.
Hi Yun :) I'm off to work for today. You seemed so peaceful sleeping, I didn't want to wake you up. See you later. Love you <3
A frown danced upon Jake's lips as he put the note down.
It was your first birthday (hopefully the first of many) that you'd spend together with Jake, and it saddened him that it wasn't something you were excited to be celebrating.
You were his favorite person, and he was going to do whatever he could to make you feel special everyday, but most especially on your birthday.
Jake spent the entire day going around the city and buying one thing after another.
A cake, party decorations, a gift, your favorite food and drinks, another gift, a birthday card, and more gifts.
Once he got back to your apartment, the boy started wrapping his gifts, writing a sweet message on the birthday card, and decorating your place in a way he thought you'd like.
He made sure all of the decorations were in your favorite color.
Jake was in the middle of plating the food he bought from two of your favorite restaurants before he suddenly heard the front door swing open.
You were shocked as you entered your apartment, hearing the playlist Jake made for you play softly in the background, seeing all the decorations hung up, the food and cake on the table, and your boyfriend in the kitchen meticulously plating some food.
"Jake?" you called, the silent question of 'what's all this?' evident in your tone.
The boy looked up from what he was working on and smiled at you.
"You're early," he said before making his way to your spot. "Happy birthday, love," he greeted while taking your face into his hands and pressing a sweet kiss onto the crown of your head.
His hands slid down to hold your hands as he pulled you over to the table where the food and gifts he prepared were.
"Jake, what's all of this for?" you asked.
You once told Jake that you never took birthdays seriously since you've never really celebrated it growing up as your parents were always busy, leading you to normally keep quiet about your birthday even to your friends.
Being someone who was used to throwing birthday parties for his friends and cousins over the years, and them doing the same for him, Jake didn't think you were serious about your sentiment and brushed it off. You proved him wrong today.
"You deserve to be celebrated. On all days, but especially today," he ran his thumb against your hand as his other arm pulled out a chair for you to sit on.
You smiled as Jake made his way to the kitchen to grab the last two plates before setting them down on the table and sitting down opposite to you.
Jake smiled as he saw you eye the decorations, food, cake, and gifts in total awe.
"I've never really celebrated my birthday like this before," you told him.
"That's because you didn't have me back then. But now you do, and that means celebrating your birthday with me is a yearly requirement, okay?" he said as he stuck out his pinky finger to interlock with yours.
"Okay," you happily replied as you interlocked your pinky with his in a promise.
Jake smiled widely before moving the cake in front of you, picking up the lighter next to it, and lighting the candles up.
He immediately held your hand again right after. "Make a wish, love," he told you.
You smiled back at him before closing your eyes and thinking of a wish.
You wished to always have Jake in your life.
As you opened your eyes and blew the candles, the world around you become more colorful as you looked at your boyfriend in front of you, eyes crinkled as he grinned from ear to ear, cheering lightly as the candles went out.
And that's when you knew. A birthday wish wasn't needed for Jake to be a permanent fixture in your life.
You were his, and he was yours.
And you were truly, madly, in love.
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꒰ᵕ༚ᵕ⑅꒱ mail !
teeny little fluff birthday imagine since it's my birthday tomorrow ⊹ヾ꒰ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ꒱ノ this was honestly so cute hehe ^_^ hope you liked it! tysm for reading<3
© ikeubi 2024 ✿ do not steal, copy, plagiarize, or translate a̲n̲y̲ of my work!
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dredgesnails · 23 days
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updated list of iskall’s future tenants in the apartment block he hasn’t built:
1. beef (paid 41 diamond blocks and a stick)
2. etho (paid 14 diamond blocks that iskall gave him minutes earlier)
3. gem (paid 50 diamonds)
4. rendog (paid nothing upfront, owes iskall like 50 diamond blocks)
5. mumbo (paid 32 diamonds)
gem and mumbo both bought the penthouses (australian, on the first floor) which iskall SAID were more expensive than any other apartment but ended up being the cheapest, and beef’s apartment comes with two free cats (one has been tamed by iskall already and the other doesn’t exist yet). there are 4 apartments still available. personally i would like to see if iskall is able to sucker doc into buying one
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golden-cherry · 4 months
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deal - cl16 (24/?)
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader
Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.
Chapter Summary: Furniture shopping is more exciting when there's talks about buying new stuff - like a bed.
Warnings: 18+ (mentions of smut), fluff, Kika is the bestest friend on this planet
Word Count: 3.4k
series masterlist
previous part
A/N: hello loves! part twenty-four is here and I hope you enjoy it! feedback is appreciated!!!
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The fact that Kika is just lying on your bed instead of snuggling up completely in your fluffy blanket is a miracle. 
"I liked the light blue mom jeans best," she says as you stand in front of the large mirror leaning against the wall next to the door to your room and look at yourself. "With the white oversized turtleneck - smash."
You look at her through the mirror. "Haha."
"I'm serious." She leans on her elbows and tilts her head. "If you wear white sneakers with it, it'll even work with the sandwich method. I've seen it on TikTok. And I swear to you - people will turn their heads to look at you."
"I don't want people turning their heads at me," you confess quietly, adjusting the soft fabric of your top. "I just want to look halfway okay."
"Trust me. You look more than okay."
After Kika and Pierre have stormed your apartment with their spare key - which at first annoyed you, but in the next moment made you feel quite relieved - your girlfriend has taken it upon herself to unpack your suitcase and pick out an outfit for you that matches your trip to the furniture store.
Unpacking your suitcase simply consisted of pulling out one item at a time and tossing it aside if it didn't meet her expectations. The pile of clothes next to the bed is the result of her search.
" Let it go," she warns you as you adjust the position of the hem of the sweater on your shoulder. "You look good. When I think about my first outfit as Pierre's girlfriend - it was pure horror."
"But I'm not a girlfriend," you reply as you reach for the jeans Kika is holding out to you. "I'm his friend. His roommate. Nothing more," you exhale, "and nothing less."
The Portugese woman watches you slip into your pants. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Caught off guard, you look at her. Are your feelings for the Monegasque so obvious that she can even see it on your face? Is your affection written all over your forehead? You can't name your emotional state, you can't say a word that could even begin to describe what you feel for Charles - but there's no question that it's definitely something other than pure friendship. 
No matter how often and vehemently you try to convince yourself that Charles is your friend, you are an incredibly bad liar. 
"I remember being incredibly nervous the first time we went out in public. I think I changed outfits three or four times before I was halfway happy."
Oh.
You sit down on the edge of the bed with her. "I want all of this. I want him." You clear your throat as Kika gives you a meaningful look. "His friendship, that is. And I'm also willing to take the risk of people not liking me and talking badly about me." You clasp your hands in your lap.
Kika sits up straight. "But?"
You curl your lips into a thin line. "I - I don't know." How do you explain to her that you're worried that his fans could dislike you so much that they doubt Charles? You're going public as friends, something that bothers you a little more than it should. But the Monegasque has also said that people will think what they want. 
What if they hate you so much - your looks, your mediocrity, your being - that Charles catches on and he realizes they're right in their opinion?
"I just want to make a good impression."
Your friend reaches for your hand. "You will. And after all, you're just friends. The public's opinion isn't all that important." You don't see her look, which says so much more than what she actually says.
"Right."
Kika lets go of your hand and stands up from the bed. "I'll be with you the whole time. We'll work it out. I promise." She tosses her long hair over her shoulder. "So, let's get going. This room is pretty bleak and could use some color," she says before pulling you off the bed and out of the room.
As you slip into your shoes at the front door, the men join you.
"So, Pierre and I are sitting -" Charles begins, but suddenly stops when he sees you. His eyes wander over your body and goose bumps spread along their path. He remains silent until Pierre nudges him. "Uhm, sorry. Yes. We - um - we're both going to sit in the front of the car because -" He scratches the back of his neck nervously, but can't take his eyes off you. "The plan is for Kika and you to go through the furniture store together and Pierre is coming with me. Just so that we are seen together as little as possible, but are still out and about together," he explains. 
You understand why this is all going to happen. He wants to protect you and you want to let him, but you can't stop your heart from getting a little bruised. 
When Kika notices your offended look, she crosses her arms in front of her chest. "So much planning for simple shopping with friends? Is that really necessary?"
As you look up from your shoes, you look straight into Charles' beautiful green eyes. Something that looks exactly like how you feel flickers across his face. "It is." He stands up straight. "Shall we?"
Kika smiles gently at you. "Let's liven this place up a bit, then." She grabs Pierre's hand and together the two of them walk out of the apartment towards the elevator, while Charles and you stay behind. You both look after them. 
"Is everything all right?" asks the Monegasque and stands next to you. 
"Everything's fine," you answer him curtly. You don't dare look at him. 
"Y/N," he says as he gently grasps your wrist and turns you towards him. "Mon amour, you know why I'm doing this, don't you?" His hand slips a little lower so your fingers can intertwine.
"'Mh-hmm." 
"Hey." His other hand rests gently against your cheek, making you look at him. "Hey." His thumb gently strokes your cheekbone. "I'm trying to protect you. That's my priority. Making sure you're okay is my priority. And if that means we can't walk through any stores next to each other for now, just so the public can get used to you, then I'll put up with it." His gaze twitches briefly to your mouth. "Even if it's not what I want."
You nuzzle your face against his warm hand. "And what do you want?" you ask softly. 
"You." 
His answer makes the blood sizzle in your veins. It feels as if the warmth of his skin is burning through your face, as if the nerve endings under your skin are sending little electric shocks through your muscles and forcing your heart to stop. You take a deep breath.
"I want you near me." He squeezes your hand twice before pulling away. Your skin feels cooler without his touch. "But I'm responsible for what happens in public. And I don't want to risk anything happening to you because of me."
You nod weakly before wordlessly following the befriended couple. You hear Charles behind you, but you don't wait for him as you walk quickly to the others. The atmosphere in the elevator is tense as you are transported towards the underground garage, but no one tries to ease the tension. Kika and Pierre look at each other a little uncertainly, something that doesn't escape your gaze, and you can't blame them. The situation is just awful.
Pierre has thought far ahead, because when he presses a button on his car key, a large SUV opens up in the underground parking garage, sure to fit some decorative items. Charles' Ferrari, or God forbid your old Renault, might have been able to fit a picture frame, or at most a small mirror. 
You sit behind Charles, who has taken a seat in the passenger seat. Kika and Pierre are talking through the rear-view mirror while you look out of the window.
The longer you think about what Charles said - or didn't say - the more uncomfortable you feel. The hem of the sweater seems to have slipped, the collar feels too tight and the sleeves are scratching your elbows. You're not sure what you were hoping for, what the right answer would have been. But you're not particularly happy with the one you got. 
You also want to be close to him, permanently. And you can also understand why the plan involves you staying away from each other inside the furniture store. But is that really necessary if you're just friends? Has he done something similar with his other female friends, or are you the only one who has to put up with this fuss? 
Your thoughts are going round and round in your head, but as if by magic they suddenly come to a standstill. But it's not magic, it's Charles' hand that has squeezed past his seat on the right and is now gripping your leg. You feel his fingers slide under the fabric of your jeans, where they rest against your calf. 
You try to regulate your breathing, but you can hear the blood pounding in your ears. Charles touching you is nothing new. You've been touching each other non-stop since last night, which doesn't help your feelings or your friendship, but it still feels indescribably good. 
It feels right the way his calloused hand wraps around your soft calf. It felt right the way his thumb stroked your cheek. It felt right to lie half-naked next to him in bed. 
It felt right to want him as something more. More than a roommate. More than a friend. 
And that's exactly why you slide your foot towards the car door, so that Charles can touch you more easily. You block out the voice that keeps whispering hypocrite to you as best you can. And the warmer his skin feels on yours, the tighter his fingers close around your calf, the better it works. 
"I'll let you both out right at the entrance and we'll park in the back of the parking lot," Pierre interrupts your thoughts before they're no longer PG. "You can go inside and we'll follow. That's the easiest way."
"Thank you very much," Charles says. "I'm sorry we're shamelessly taking advantage of you."
Pierre has to grin. "You're welcome to give me a position in Bahrain, then we'd be even."
"You'd have to get close to me on the track first."
The two men argue amicably until the car comes to a halt in front of the deserted entrance. Just as you are about to open the door, Charles's fingers gently squeeze your leg twice and you have to suppress a smile, otherwise Kika would tease you endlessly. As you both get out and the car drives away, she latches on to you. 
"Are you ready?" she asks as you walk towards the glass door together. 
"Definitely."
Kika has very good taste in decorating and if she hadn't become a model, she could definitely have worked at Ikea putting together those fake rooms. As you push a shopping cart in front of you, she skips through the aisles, grabbing anything that matches in color or style. Picture frames, vases, mirrors and fake plants that would look good on the windowsill in your room. 
She's examining which of the candles in front of her would go better with the vases in the shopping cart when your cell phone vibrates in your pocket. 
Charles: If one of the candles burns down our apartment, I'll have to charge you rent. 
Confused, you read the message before looking up and around. Charles is standing about twenty meters away from you, smiling at you over the shelves. You bite the inside of your cheek.
You: You don't need my money, Mr. Ferrari. After all, you make millions a year. 
You raise an eyebrow challengingly as Charles reads your message. You can see his grin clearly, even from this distance. 
Charles: If you burn down my expensive apartment, I'll have to find a new one, and they're not exactly cheap in Monaco, as you know. 
You: I thought it was our apartment?
Charles: If you let it burn down, you're welcome to keep it.
You: So you'd let me keep it? Our apartment?
Charles: I'd give you anything, mon amour. You just have to ask for it. 
You don't have time to think about his answer because Kika throws a stuffed animal dinosaur in your face. 
"Are you done flirting?" she asks, playing annoyed. "I'm trying to decorate your room and you'd rather flirt than help me."
You feel the blood rush to your face. "Excuse me?"
Her grin almost reaches your ears. "Gotcha."
"You can't possibly have caught me doing something I wasn't doing," you try to wriggle out of it, but Kika has bitten down like a little terrier.
"And why are you looking like you've eaten the last spoonful of tiramisu without asking if anyone else wants the rest?" 
"I haven't eaten any tiramisu," you defend yourself and hug the green stuffed animal tightly to your chest. 
"Not yet," she says gently and puts one of the candles in the cart with the rest. "But I'm afraid you could get diabetic if you're not careful with the tiramisu. A small piece is fine, but a double portion could almost be too much." 
You narrow your eyes. "I haven't eaten any tiramisu." Without taking your eyes off her, you put the green dino in the shopping cart too. "And I don't intend to."
"You're a bad liar," she says and stands next to you, wrapping her arms tightly around you. "But that's all right. I still love you. And when your room looks really cool soon, I'll take the outfit pictures for my Instagram in front of your mirror."
She gives you a peck on the cheek and you roll your eyes. "Charles was right. We need to change the locks, then you can't disturb us anymore."
"Disturb? Disturbing what? Eating tiramisu?" she grins and you would have loved to suffocate her with the green dino. Apparently Kika can read minds, because she quickly lets go of your arms and continues to skip happily through the corridors while you follow her with the shopping cart. 
"How much do you think the things you picked out for me cost?" you ask her as she picks out more plants.
She takes a look at the shopping cart. "Something between two hundred and five hundred euros," she replies with a shrug.
"Kika, that's too much. Way too much," you try to stop her as she walks over to the rugs on display. "I can't pay for it. I'm unemployed, remember?" You're about to turn the shopping cart around and return the selected items to their rightful places, but Kika stands in your way. 
"Charles offered to pay for this," she says, confused, resting her perfectly manicured hands on the metal grille of the cart. 
"He what?" you ask, looking around in the hope of spotting Charles somewhere. But he's nowhere to be seen.
"Pierre sent me a text message to leave the car at the checkouts when we're done. He said that Charles wanted to pay for it and that we should wait outside for them," she explains, tilting her head. "I thought he would have told you. I know you're unemployed, but because of the text message, I thought that - I assumed we could just pick out nice items without looking at the price."
You run your tongue over your teeth. "Give me a moment, please," you say briefly and leave her standing there with the shopping cart. 
You walk through every aisle, looking over every shelf in the hope of seeing Charles standing somewhere. And when, after ten minutes, you spot his brown curls in the furthest corner of the store, you don't care if the two of you are seen together. He's standing in front of a gray, hip-high box spring, with nice, dark bedding and comfortable-looking pillows placed on it. When you stop next to him, he doesn't look at you.
"I want to buy a new bed," he begins the conversation. "The one I have now is too low for me. What do you think of this one? I've tried it out. It's really comfortable and the perfect height for -" He falls silent before he can finish the sentence. 
"Kika says you want to pay for my things," you change the subject without answering his question. You don't take your eyes off the bed either. 
"That's correct."
"I don't want that," you say tersely. "I don't want you to pay for it."
"But I want to," he replies, looking at you out of the corner of his eye. "Think of it as a gift."
"As a gift?" You raise an eyebrow. "As a gift for what?"
"For your friendship."
"You can have my friendship without buying me new things," you assure him, but you fall on deaf ears. 
"But I want to. I have so much money that I can't spend on my own, so I want to buy you nice things." He leans a little towards you so that your hands touch. "How expensive are the things? One thousand, two thousand euros?"
"Kika says five hundred at most."
"Then think of it as a small, early Christmas present," he says gently. Before you can object, he continues. "I want you to feel comfortable and if it costs me some money, then so be it. And it won't hurt my bank account in the slightest. So just say thank you and accept the gift."
"Thank you," you whisper reluctantly, but you know that it wouldn't do any good to go against his wishes. "Did you find something you want to buy?"
He smiles. "This bed, apparently. And bedding. And a mirror."
"Doesn't sound bad. I just hope you have as good a taste as Kika. After all, our things have to match," you joke.
Charles turns his head in your direction. "Then lie down on the bed, mon amour. I'd like to see how you look on it before I spend thousands of euros on it." As he says it and his fingers curl around your wrist, that feeling blossoms in your chest again.
You want to throw him on the bed in front of you, kiss him until you can't breathe and touch him until you can see stars. You want to feel his warm skin under your fingertips, feel his muscles tense as he pulls you on top of him and presses you against his firm body. You want to feel his weight on you as he lays you down on the bed and his lips trail down from your mouth. You want to - 
"Do you really think I'm going to try sleeping without you again when we've figured out that we both sleep better when we're together?" he asks, gently stroking the thin skin on your wrist with his thumb. You hope he can't feel your racing pulse underneath. "When we first met, you said that you hadn't had a decent night's sleep in a long time. And if it means I have to hold you in my arms so you can get a good night's sleep, then so be it. And it's not as if I don't enjoy having you close to me."
Before you can answer him, you feel a person standing at your other side and when you look, Kika is standing there. Her gaze flickers briefly to your hands before she turns to the bed as well. "Do any of you fancy a bite to eat?" she asks. "There's a restaurant nearby that serves incredibly good tiramisu. And it's never busy. We can go there if you like." She turns slightly in your direction and nudges you. "What about you? Do you want some tiramisu?"
More like a need than a want.
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loafgeto · 7 months
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ᝬ 𝗥𝗢𝗢𝗠𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗦 ⤵︎
toji fushiguro x fem!reader
synopsis: you’re getting your first apartment with your own money, but there has been a complication with the housing and you were accidentally roomed with a stranger.
cw: fem!reader, 18+ mdni, explicit language, age gap (reader is 22, while toji is 30), she/her pronouns, big dick toji, masturbation, teasing, dirty talk, size kink, fingering, squirting, orgasming, unprotected sex, oral sex (m. receiving), slight breast play, pet names (pretty/good girl, sweetheart, princess). if i miss anything lmk. NOT proofread, ignore typos
wc: 6.4k (DIDNT KNOW I WROTE THIS MUCH LMFAOO)
a/n: uh if you guys see me use “princess” so much then like don’t mind me cuz i love the pet name and toji seems to suit saying it too. anyways, contemplating on what to write next 😟
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After graduating university and acquiring your dream job, you were finally able to buy your own apartment with your savings from countless overworking shifts and paychecks. To say the least, all of the exhaustion and frustration was definitely worth it.
Today was the day you’d get your keys, and officially move in your things. The apartment consisted of a single bedroom, one bathroom, a kitchen and a personal laundry area— all suitable for one person. When you first toured the building, you instantly fell in love and knew it was going to be your place of living for a while. So, you signed the paperwork and officially got the place.
You arrived at your apartment that afternoon, the feeling of excitement flowing through your veins. The neighborhood was relatively welcoming and safe, and there were many amenities surrounding the area, making it easily accessible.
As you were walking to the main office to retrieve your keys, your attention was primarily directed to the nature around you, along with the lively kids running around at the playground and other residents walking by, greeting you with smiles and quick hellos.
After settling in, you planned to get yourself a pet— whether it be a dog or cat, or both. You wanted some company at least.
When you arrived at the main office, you were greeted by a timid young man. “Hello there! Good afternoon. How may I help you today?” he questions when you approach the desk.
“Hello! I’m here to pick up my keys to my apartment. I just moved into the neighborhood,” you reply with a smile.
“Of course, may I have your name?” the male continues to inquire and you give him your information before he goes into the back. He returns shortly afterwards with a key and a piece of paper. “Here are your keys! If you have any concerns or questions please come back here.”
“Thank you so much,” you give the young man a final smile before you took the keys into your own hands. You were way beyond excited now and quickly left the main office to return to your car which was parked right by your apartment.
The movers would arrive that evening, so you were able to use some hours to adjust to the new place— or even buy some groceries since you already had a fridge installed— or figure out how to decorate the entire apartment. There were many options for you to choose, but you decided to pick whenever you got there.
At the same time, you couldn’t help but wonder who your neighbors would be. Would they be welcoming and respectful? Or rude and impolite? Even if they weren’t the best people, you’d hope to at least get on their good side so there’d be no issues.
You arrived at your apartment’s door minutes later, thrilled to unlock it and step inside, getting a whiff of the new life ahead of you. APARTMENT D, 404. Inserting the keys into the key hole, you twist and unlock the door before pushing the door open.
Of course, this apartment was only suitable for at least one person and if a couple were to move in together, they’d have to work together on the space. So, is someone going to tell you why a man is standing right ahead of you— drenched in shower water and only in a towel that’s wrapped around his hips?
Your mouth dropped, eyes observing how defined and muscular his entire body was, but that wasn’t the point. Clearly, you stepped into the wrong apartment. Right?
“O-Oh- I’m so sorry! I think I accidentally went into the wrong apartment!” you could feel blood rush to your cheeks due to embarrassment and you quickly avoid gazes with him. You were confused, you knew this was your apartment— your keys, the slip and signed papers could prove it all.
So why—
“You’re Y/n?” the male questions, clearly unaffected by the situation.
“Huh? Oh- yeah! Yes, I’m Y/n!” you reply, giving him a nod as you finally turn to him. Gosh, what is happening? “I-I’m so sorry once again, I probably got my keys mixed up or something—“
“You didn’t,” the male intervenes, now approaching closer to you.
“Excuse me?”
“We’re goin’ to be roommates for a while, until they get the housing shit sorted out. You heard, didn’t you?” he questions, tilting his head, as if you were already aware of this situation.
“Huh? Roommates?” your eyes widen, mouth dropping once again. From what you can recall, no one and nothing has mentioned about you getting a roommate— let alone it being a guy!
“Oh, guess not then,” the male awkwardly rubs the back of his neck with his hand, finally understanding that you had no knowledge about this whatsoever. “Let’s introduce each other first then. Toji Fushiguro, nice to meet you, sweetheart. We’ll be roommates for a week or so.”
“Wh-What? Okay, I did not pay and sign the papers for this!” you raise your voice and Toji only shrugs.
“Complain to them. Not me.”
And you did. After Toji dressed himself in proper clothes, you dragged him with you back to the main office. It was natural for someone to be infuriated and confused with this matter, but you couldn’t believe it was happening to you.
You always check your messages and emails, even from accounts you barely ever use, and you swore you never detected anything that would relate to having a complete stranger living with you in your new apartment. There were no letters or calls from the management of the apartment complex either, so you were still confused on why this was happening.
“We’re very sorry for the inconvenience, miss Y/n and mister Toji,” the manager who you called just moments ago bows his head down, apologizing to you. “There was several problems with the housing situation and we are trying to sort it out. There are several movers who have this problem so please don’t worry about being the only ones!”
“That’s not that I’m concerned about here,” you reply, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Y-Yes, of course. Please, we are still situating the problem and are doing the best we can. Please allow us a week and a half or so to solve the issue. We will report back to you both by then. We hope you understand,” the manager continues, keeping his head lowered.
You were about to reply when Toji presses a hand on your shoulder, intervening the conversation. “She understands. Thank you for your time,” he says, beginning to dismiss the two of you out before you could even utter anything.
“Hey! Don’t you think you’re being too calm with the situation?!” you stop and turn to him as he removes his hand away from your shoulder when you both step outside.
Toji shrugs, not returning a glance as he kept walking forward. “Don’t you think you’re being too dramatic over this? You heard them, they’re sorting it out. It’s just gonna be a week, sweetheart. If you got a problem, stay somewhere else until then.”
“What?!” your eyes follow him before your legs moved to catch up to his side. “First of all— don’t call me sweetheart. Second, of course I’m going to be pissed about this because I did not pay for this! Third, I have no where else to go and I can’t just crash at a friend’s with all of my things?!”
“Mistakes happen,” Toji says, now looking at you. “And well, if you have no where else to go— then deal with it, for a week. Sweetheart.”
Toji smiles before heading back to the apartment, leaving you even more infuriated. No matter what, you’re going to avoid this man until he finally gets moved somewhere else.
Or so you thought.
After your movers brought in your things, Toji made you pile your boxes into a corner for the time being— since there was no need to decorate the place at the moment. You figured and complied, not wanting to argue with this man.
For some reason, your mattress didn’t end up arriving with the rest of your belongings, so you had to sleep on your futon— beside of Toji’s. Of course, you wanted to sleep in the farthest corner away from him, but he insisted he wasn’t going to do anything.
Toji kept to himself, rarely trying to make some sort of conversation with you, but it wasn’t like you were complaining. He normally spent his attention on his phone, as if he was messaging someone or whatever. He’d randomly laugh or say something when it’d be quiet, catching you off guard.
You never said anything and plugged your earbuds into your ear, trying to avoid him at all cost. Closing your eyes, you just told yourself over and over again that this was only for a week or so. And then soon, you’ll never have to encounter him as much anymore.
As night fell, you suddenly felt the urge to eat. You had completely forgotten about grocery shopping and there wasn’t any open stores you could go to. You figured a quick stop at the convenience store would help, and decided to go there instead for something to eat.
You slip on your jacket and grab your wallet and phone. You hadn’t realize Toji was in the kitchen, doing something until you stepped in, watching as he was waiting for the pot of water to boil.
Toji noticed you from the corner of his eyes, and he turns, giving you a placid expression. “What?”
“Oh.. nothing. I’m just going to the convenience store since there’s no food for me here,” you reply to him before walking past him to the front door.
“Want me to come with?” Toji’s offer slightly appalls you and you turn back around to face him as you slip on your shoes. You’re uncertain, and Toji could notice that. “It’s late, wouldn’t want a young woman like you to get hurt, y’know.”
“It’s.. fine,” you say, with a little grin before turning back around, fondling with your keys. “Besides, you already seen occupied yourself.”
Toji didn’t respond for a moment, and when you were about to turn around again, he was suddenly behind you. Surprised, you nearly had a heart attack because how swift he was getting ready to accompany you out.
“Let’s go,” Toji says, already dressed in a jacket with shoes on. You give him a blank stare, but you didn’t say anything as you both exit the apartment.
Toji stood behind of you as you both walked to the nearest convenience store down the street. It was silent between the two of you— the only noise being distant cars, crickets chirping, and the soft sounds of your footsteps. Not only that, it was quite cooler in the night, which made you cuddle yourself beneath your jacket.
You didn’t once turn around to look at Toji, and even if you wanted to, you didn’t want to seem weird for just looking at him and not saying anything. He’d probably expected you to start a conversation or even inquire why you were randomly looking at him. You were overthinking at that moment, but for a fact, you were sort of glad Toji accompanied you.
The two of you arrived at the convenience store shortly enough and you went to grab a basket for your items. You figured Toji would do the same and go separate directions, but you quickly noticed that he was following you around instead.
You figured this could be a time to start a conversation. “Well. Is there anything you want? You can just put it in the basket and I can buy it for you,” you say, offering as a reward of gratitude since he had accompanied you.
“Nah. I’m fine,” Toji declines.
“Are you sure?” you repeat, and he nods his head, assuring you that he didn’t necessarily need anything to eat.
But even if Toji said he didn’t want anything, you decided to get him something. You found yourself getting a lot of food due to that and you felt slightly embarrassed, thinking that Toji probably thought you were odd for getting that much food for a night.
After paying the items and walking back to the apartment, you just couldn’t help but begin to feel curious about Toji— even after planning to deliberately avoid him the entire week or so. He was just an individual that you’ve never necessarily encountered before.
You didn’t know what made him stand out from other people, but there was definitely something about him. And so, you decide to start a conversation again.
“So. Toji,” you say, turning your head around since he was walking behind you again. His eyes raise to meet yours and he tilts his head. “Since we are going to be living with each other for a week.. shouldn’t we get to know each other.”
“Thought you hated me,” Toji smiles.
“What? No! I never said that! Yes, I was rude to you earlier but I was just upset at the housing situation since I didn’t expect it.. or even heard about it until today,” you sigh, feeling blood rush to your cheeks. “Well. Anyways. Let’s start with the basics— how old are you or whatever.”
“Hm,” Toji hums, eyes observing your face. “I’m 30”
“Oh, wow. You’re 8 years older than me,” you reply, nodding your head. Well, you honestly thought he was younger, but the age made sense due to his appearance. His built was great too. “I’m 22.”
“Fresh out of college, huh?”
“Yes.. technically. Almost been half a year since I graduated,” you nod your head. Okay, this conversation was going better than expected. “Did you go to university, Toji?”
“Nah. Waste of time and money. I left from home when I was 18,” Toji answers and your eyes slightly widen from the unexpected response. Well, you definitely didn’t think of that possibility at all.
“Oh..” you nod, wondering what to inquire next before it became silently awkward again.
“What did you study in college?” Toji then asked.
“I studied in business! It’s a common major but it’ll get me around. I found a good job during my third year of college and took an internship. And after graduating, they officially hired me,” you reply to his question, giving him a smile. Toji didn’t seem like a bad person at all.
“Young ones like you make me regret not going to college,” Toji chuckles softly as he was now walking next to you.
“Well, you can still go to college. There’s no age limit at all. You’re still young too, you know. I met some people in their late 40’s who are attending university,” you comment, hoping that would give him some consideration if he actually still wanted to attend.
Toji only gives you a glance before turning his head to look ahead. “I’ll think about it.”
The two of you finally arrived back at the apartment. You felt extremely relieved about the conversation you just had with Toji and figured you could actually end up being friends with him.
From that moment, the two of you detected another couple as you both approached the door leading to the apartment. They lived next door, the woman was patiently waiting for her partner to open the door as they spoke.
“Oh! This couple must be our new neighbors, dear!” the woman says and gently taps her husband’s shoulder, causing him to look in the direction of you and Toji.
“Hello, it’s nice to meet you both,” you and Toji bow your heads. “And we’re not—“
“It’s a pleasure to meet you both! We heard we were getting new neighbors but I wasn’t sure when we would be able to properly meet,” the man quickly spoke before you could add that you and Toji weren’t a couple.
“Yes, yes. It’s nice to know that we aren’t the only couples living here— since this apartment complex is a single room and the rest are two person or above friendly,” the woman giggles. “Oh! How about we have a dinner tonight?!”
“Thank you but we—“ you start again, but Toji interrupts.
“I apologize, not tonight. We still have a lot of things to unpack. Maybe another night,” Toji says, placing a hand on your shoulder before pulling you close. “Plus, she’s very tired and we wouldn’t want to bother the two of you.”
“Oh dear, no, it’s fine! Another time then,” the woman nods with a reassuring smile.
“Well then, we can talk about dinner plans whenever,” her husband says before opening the door to their home.
After chatting a few more times and introducing each other with names, the woman gives you and Toji one last smile. “By the way, the walls here are very thin. Try not to get a noise complaint from the single person’s living around here!”
And then, she gives you two a wave before following her husband inside. You and Toji remain silent, processing what she meant, until it hit you.
You quickly went into the apartment without saying anything to Toji and he follows behind, closing the door as you placed the bag of food on the kitchen counter.
“Anyways. Let’s eat!” you say, turning to Toji who appears absolutely unaffected by what just happened. He gives you a look before you add on. “Oh, I bought enough food for the two of us, so you might as well eat some with me.”
There was a table in the small room you and Toji shared, so the two of you gathered there. You begin assembling the food across the table as Toji sat across from you.
“Oh, so that’s why you bought a lot,” Toji comments.
“Of course. I wouldn’t want you to just watch me eat everything if you’re hungry. That’d be rude,” you reply, placing a set of chopsticks ahead of him. “And besides, take it as a thank you for accompanying me to the convenience store.”
“If you insist,” Toji says with a smile as he lifts the chopsticks in his hands.
The two of you began eating, in silence once again. There really wasn’t much to inquire about, and even if there was, you don’t want to pry into Toji’s personal space too much.
And eventually, the quick dinner ended and the two of you cleaned up the table and threw any trash and store leftovers. You figured it was a good start to living with Toji for a week, and maybe there would be better options tomorrow.
While Toji was in the bathroom, you were sitting on your futon in the corner and had your back against the wall. You were scrolling through your phone, whether it be from messages to posts on social media, you were just bored and wasn’t feeling tired at all.
You changed into a shirt and sleeping shorts before wrapping a warm blanket around your body. You remained on your phone for a while, until you began hearing noises from the other side of the wall your back was against.
From what you could gather, it was the couple you and Toji met earlier. They seemed to be talking and moving around, muffled noises would follow after. You figured they must be rearranging something, since you recalled to the woman saying how thin the wall was.
You began hearing shuffling noises right by you, as if their bed was directly next to the wall on the other side. You blink several times, beginning to avoid what they were doing.
After several moments, you began hearing soft moans of the woman, which caught you off guard and flustered. The lewd noises were consistent, and she kept saying her husband’s name with such affection. They were fucking, literally, right by the other side of the wall.
You remain flustered, as you continued listening to them. You could’ve honestly just put in your earbuds and blast loud music to avoid listening further, but you couldn’t stop yourself. It was slowly turning you on.
The imagination of having your neighbors being able to hear you and someone fucking turned you on. You were completely lost in your thoughts as your breathing became heavier and you slipped one hand down between your thighs.
You pressed your ear against the wall, hearing the moans and grunts become louder by the minute. You bite your lower up, refraining from making any noise as you push your hands beneath your short and under your panties.
Your middle finger began rubbing circles against your clit, before gliding down your folds that were beginning to become soaked with your arousal. Fuck. This was a very risky situation, given the fact that Toji was still around and could leave the bathroom any moment.
But by then, you didn’t even think about him. You kept your attention on pleasuring yourself and the sex on the other side of the wall. Honestly, you wanted nothing more but to be fucked just like that. After you previous relationship, you hadn’t gotten with anyone and it’s been at least over a year.
You push two of your fingers into your dripping cunt, curling them up and moving them in and out. You started to let out low moans while biting down your lip, refraining them to be louder. Shit.. you’d never thought you could be turned on like this.
Pushing your thighs further apart, you sink your fingers deeper into your pussy, your arousal beginning to stick on your knuckles as you thrust them in and out. You take them out, rubbing your clit once again with your wet fingers before pushing them back in your hole.
Your neighbors continued to fuck, the woman’s moans bouncing off the walls and resonating your quiet room. But it all came to a stop when you heard the bathroom door opening, causing you to panic and quickly pull your hands away.
You were so close to being caught.
Toji walks into the room, towel over his shoulder as his eyes directed to you. He was slightly confused, noticing how flustered you were. “You okay there?” he questions.
“I-I’m fine,” you stutter, realizing that the neighbor’s noises were still very much detectable.
Toji definitely heard them already, but he hadn’t address it yet. The room fell silent as the neighbors moans begin to become heard once again, and the awkwardness between you and Toji arose.
“They’re not too loud,” Toji finally comments with a sly grin.
“You think?” you raise a brow, keeping your eyes away from his. Your body was beginning to become hotter, mostly due to the embarrassment of almost being caught.
“Why are you so flustered?” Toji inquired as he starts walking closer to you.
“I’m not! I’m just— surprised!” you try to make some sort of excuse as you kept avoiding his gaze. Toji stood ahead of you before kneeling down to your level. You clear your throat, turning your head slightly and locking eyes with him.
Toji’s grin becomes wider. “You turned on or something?”
“Excuse me? I’m-“ you start but Toji was quick to hush you by leaning closer to your face, one of his hands pressing against the wall beside of your face.
“Come on. Listen to them. Aren’t you imagining and wishing it was happening to you instead?” Toji starts to tease you, his smile becoming more mischievous as your face grows even more timid.
“Please.. stop..” you turn your head away from him. It didn’t help that Toji was so close to you. It was true, you were still turned on, but you definitely didn’t want to admit it.
“Well, we’re going to be listening to them all night then,” Toji says, about to turn away when you grab his hand. He looks at you, quite surprised with your actions but he didn’t stop you. He only chuckles before leaning closer to your face again. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Can’t use words to admit that you’re turned on?”
You only shake your head, glancing at him several times and then at another direction. It was embarrassing, but Toji found it amusing.
“No need to be embarrassed,” Toji says, grasping his hand around your wrist and pulls you towards him. You were surprised but didn’t restrain as Toji presses you down on your futon. “Normally I’d get paid to do this. But you’ll be an exception.”
“People pay you to fuck them?”
“Some of the time. I follow the request of anyone in order to get money. It’s how I was able to get one of these apartments in the first place,” Toji snickers, laying beside of you and removing the blanket from your body. “So, you wanna do this, pretty girl?”
“Y-Yes..” you nod, looking up at him.
Cute, Toji smiles before hovering his body over you. From the very moment you two met, he noticed how small you were compared to him. He’d imagine you being so afraid of him putting his cock in you, but he’d assure you that it would fit. Seeing how you were when it came to sex caused Toji to be slightly amused— since he never expected to get to this point with you.
“Ever slept with a man 5 plus years older than you before?” Toji inquires, slipping his hand between your thigh. He starts rubbing your inner thigh, close to your pelvic area, which makes you tremble.
“N-No.. not at all. My first time,” you reply, nearly squirming at Toji’s cold hands against your skin.
“Yeah?” Toji smiles, using his hands to slide off your shorts, and eventually your soaked panties. You felt embarrassed, trying to cover yourself up once Toji tosses the materials away. But he push your legs apart with his strength and aligns his body between them. “God, you’re so wet. Gonna fuck this pussy and make you scream even louder.”
“T-Toji..” you whine, covering your face with your hands.
“Yeah, yeah, I hear you sweetheart,” Toji chuckles, noting how impatient you are.
Toji glides the tip of his middle finger against your wet entrance, making you squirm. He pushes two fingers into your pussy and presses his thumb against your clit. The feeling of his long and thick fingers thrust inside you made you reach an instant ecstasy you’ve never felt before.
Your moans started to drop from your mouth even more as Toji drives his finger deeper into your pussy, creating squelching noises. He smirks, rubbing circles against your clit with his thumb before he secretly inserts another finger.
“F-Fuck, Toji!” you gasp, feeling the third finger slip in. His fingers were so long and big. Comparing to yours, he’d be able to wrap your hands in his.
“I like how you say my name, princess,” Toji whispers, leaning in close to press a kiss on your forehead. “Come on, keep saying it.”
“Toji.. Toji..” you slowly chant through your moans as he starts pumping his fingers in and out of you faster.
You’ve never had three fingers in you before, it was very much a new and different experience, but you fucking loved it. Toji curls his fingers, rubbing against your g-spot and making you reach closer to your orgasm.
His fingers kept pleasuring you in ways you’ve never thought you’d experience again, yet even better. Toji uses his other hand to hold your face, making you look at him as he fucks you with his fingers and making you moan his name out.
“Toji—“ you moan out, using one hand to grip his hand on your face. “Gonna c-cum..”
“Already?” Toji hums, maintaining the pace of his fingers pumping into your pussy. He slips one out, being able to thrust the two in and out faster. Your lewd noises start permeating the room, along with the wet noises of your pussy.
“Fuck, yes, Toji! I’m cu—“ you holler out, throwing your head back as you squirted immediately after. Your body trembles as you came all over your futon and fall back down against the ground.
“Not bad, sweetheart,” Toji comments as he slips his fingers out and into his mouth, getting the taste of you.
You don’t say anything besides watch him. You’re catching your breath, hands still slightly covering your flustered expression, until Toji reaches for his sweatpants. He was definitely hard now, from his way his cock was poking out.
“Damn. Never been this hard before,” Toji grunts as he pushes his pants down, his cock leaping up instantly. Your eyes observe in awe, and you give him a slight concerning expression.
“T-Toji.. it’s not gonna fit..” you say as Toji starts pumping his hard cock that was already leaking with pre-cum.
“I’ll make it fit.”
Toji gives you a smile before pressing the tip of his cock at your entrance. He moves his cock up and down against your folds, soaking the tip with your arousal and teasing your clit. Not only was he a bigger man, but his dick was too. You’ve only ever seen something like that in pornography, but being able to see it in person was appalling.
“Ready, princess?” Toji asks as he lifts his gaze to you.
You give him a nod and Toji instantly pushes his cock into you, making you squirm as you felt his dick stretch you out. “S-shit. So big, Toji..” you comment, both hands grabbing his biceps.
“Fuck- see that? Your pussy is already taking me so good,” Toji grunts before thrusting his entire length into you, earning more moans from your mouth. He starts moving his hips, using both hands to guide your legs further apart and starts thrusting faster.
The feeling of his big cock rubbing against the walls of your pussy was already driving you insane. Toji felt you clench him tightly as he thrusted, which makes him smirk, seeing how addicted you were already becoming to him.
Toji then pulls away and lifts one of your legs over his shoulder, before pounding his cock right back into your dripping cunt. Your moans were escalating at that point, his name falling out of your mouth like a music note, and you both knew anyone around could hear how good he was fucking you.
“Toji- fuck yes, just like that!” you cry out, feeling the tip of his cock kiss your womb.
“Shit, princess. Everyone in this neighborhood is gonna know my name now,” Toji grunts again, thrusting his cock deeper into you before using a finger to rub your clit.
Your fingers curve against the skin of his biceps and your nails dig into his flesh, creating your nail marks on his skin as he pounded you. The sound of your moans and his grunts along with the wet slapping sounds began resonating the room, and your mind started becoming foggy.
Toji removes one of your hands from his biceps and presses it down on your lower stomach. “You feel that? You feel how deep I am inside of you?” Toji inquires, placing his hand over yours and you give him a nod.
“Yes- Toji. So fucking deep, keep going,” you beg, seeing water in your eyes due to the amount of pleasure this man was giving to you. “Want you to kiss me, Toji.”
Toji doesn’t hesitate and leans down, pressing his lips against yours while guiding both of your legs to wrap around his waist as he continues thrusting into you. One of your hands reach up to grasp his hair and tug him closer to you while your tongues start pressing against each others and your moans were falling into his mouth.
The welled tears finally began streaming down the sides of your face and Toji wipes them away while still kissing you. He pulls away, lifting you up with him. “Face the wall,” he commands and you listen, getting on your knees and pressing your hands against the wall when facing it.
Toji aligns himself behind of you, completely towering over you. He loved how small you were compared to him. He grabs the side of your hips, pushing them back against his before slamming his cock right back into you.
“O-Oh, fuckk,” you moan, feeling his dick penetrate you so deep and rubbing against your g-spot perfectly.
You clench around his cock again, making him groan as he starts thrusting. Your forehead presses against the cold sensation of the wall and you’re moaning even louder than before. Toji slides one hand beneath the shirt you’re still wearing and pushes your bra to the side to grope your breast.
“Such nice tits you have princess,” Toji mumbles in your ear before kissing your neck several times.
You’re crying again while uncontrollably moaning and screaming his name, begging for him to fuck you faster, rougher, and touch you more. His thick cock gliding against the walls of your pussy was making you reach your next orgasm and Toji could tell that you were close.
Toji’s hips slams against your ass to the point that you believed it would leave a mark later. He leans forward, using one hand to grab your neck and pull your head back. Your eyes meet his and you both share a quick kiss.
“‘m gonna cum again!” you cry out, eyes shutting as you were finally close to cumming.
“Yeah? You gonna cum on my cock like a good girl?” Toji murmurs, kissing the side of your face before returning his hand to the side of your hips. He rocks his hips faster, pounding so fucking deep into you that your body is railing against the wall.
“Toji—“ you moan out his name as you came all over him and your body nearly drops to the ground as you heavily breathe for air.
Toji grunts, feeling your cum all over him as he slips his cock out. He was still quite hard, due to not cumming and he too finds himself catching for air. You turn around, giving him a look to indicate that you weren’t done and it caught Toji by surprise.
Your mouth ended up finding its way to Toji’s cock and you began pumping him with your two hands. Toji groans, looking down at you as your tongue began swirling around the swollen tip of this throbbing dick. Imagining how your small mouth was going to take his cock was appealing to him, and he desperately wanted to shove himself down your throat.
Your mouth latches on the tip of his cock as you’re uncertain whether or not to take his entire length into your mouth, but you wanted to try. You start sucking and licking your tongue all around the tip, while pumping the rest of his length with your hand.
“F-Fuck,” Toji stammers as you look up into his eyes. “Gotta feel your entire mouth around me, princess.”
You begin pushing your face forward, making his cock sink deeper into your mouth until his tip smacked your throat. He was nearly halfway in your mouth, but you swore you couldn’t take him any further.
Toji groans as you start bobbing your head slowly, feeling his hand grasp your hair. His dick twitches inside your mouth, causing you to moan. You return one hand to pump his cock as your mouth moved up and down, your saliva covering his entire length.
“Your mouth’s so fucking good,” Toji compliments, watching your every movement. He’d never thought someone could take his cock so sensually. “Such a pretty girl.”
You squirm as you return your mouth around his tip, sucking and licking it before pushing your head back down. Toji grits his teeth, admiring how good you’re taking his cock and making him reach close to his orgasm.
“You’re gonna make me cum, princess,” Toji whines, the hand grasping your hair tightening as he gently rocks his hips.
Hearing that, you start moving and bobbing your head faster, sucking and licking his entire cock as wet and your lewd noises spilled from your mouth. You pump his cock several times again, enjoying the moans he was making.
Toji groans, pushing your head slightly for his cock to enter deeper into your mouth. You wince, surprised by this and shut your eyes as he initially begins guiding your head on his cock.
“Shit. I’m cumming now,” Toji says, throwing his head back slightly as he shoots his cum deep into your mouth and you moan, feeling the warm liquid hit your throat.
Toji could feel and watches as you swallow his cum, making a slight face afterwards to which he chuckles. You pull your head away from his cock, a small string of saliva connected from your tongue to the tip of his dick being seen before disconnecting. You were exhausted and nearly slumped over, but Toji caught you by placing his hands on your shoulders.
“You did good,” Toji says, lifting your face up with his hand before kissing you, to which you returned. The kiss was more passionate and gentle, and you couldn’t believe you were craving more from him.
But because of this, you both knew that there was no need for the other to move out.
The next morning, you woke up feeling numb and immediately recalled to the events of that night as your eyes opened to see that Toji was no longer beside of you. After cleaning up, you and Toji ended up sleeping on his futon, since yours was drenched in cum.
You sense blood rushing to your cheeks as the events start replaying in your head and your heart couldn’t stop racing. You were in Toji’s clothes instead of yours and you could whiff the distinct smell of his scent.
Pushing yourself up from the futon, you remove the covers from your body and walked towards the kitchen. When arriving by the entrance to the kitchen, you notice Toji standing by the door, his back facing you.
He was talking to someone, but the conversation was muffled, so you couldn’t detect anything they were saying. After a moment, Toji closes the door and turns around, eyes meeting yours instantly.
“Oh, you’re awake,” Toji says, holding a small piece of paper and appearing unaffected by whatever was written on it.
“What’s that? And who was that at the door?” you inquire, raising a brow as Toji approaches you.
“Seems like we got a noise complaint,” Toji snickers, showing you the paper he was given and allowed you to briefly glance over it before crumpling it up and tossing it to the side.
Toji snakes an arm around you, his hand cupping your ass and pulling you close. Your lips immediately crashed against his and you both share a sloppy kiss before pulling away.
“Guess we should be louder tonight then.”
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LOAF4U. thank you for reading! please do not copy my work or publish in another media without my permission.
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totheblood · 7 months
Text
roommate!ellie headcanons
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warnings: 18+ , a little smutty, not proofread at all
a/n: ai audios at the end... yum is all, pls pls reblog, like, and reply
ellie is ecstatic when she realizes she can finally move off campus this upcoming semester
ellie is all but excited when she realizes she can’t afford the two-bedroom apartment off campus on her own
she had finally saved enough money to live off campus, but now if she didn’t find a roommate on time, she would essentially be homeless
she was thinking of asking dina or jesse, but since they had just moved in together, they wouldn’t be able to get out of their lease
so she puts an ad on the university’s website, writing “NEED ROOMMATE ASAP” on the student boards
she gets like 5 applications, and not to her surprise, they are all weirdos
two of the guys who applied didn’t even go to the school and left half of the application blank
another girl asked if she could bring her two birds with her
and the last person left their name blank
the only semi-normal one was you, and when ellie went to meet you she thought, “huh, this could work.”
she gave you a half-smile, looking you up and down before asking, “when can you move in?”
she squeezed her eyes shut as you hugged her, repeating “thank you, thank you, thank you,” over and over again
sighing, she lightly pushes you off of her, “not really the hugging type,” she gently taps your shoulder, something crumpling inside her when she sees you deflate
on move-in day ellie stands by the door holding it open as you and some tall guy haul in boxes together
she watches you interact with him as she decides to pitch in and help, wondering if he is your boyfriend
for roommate business only, of course
she watches as he says something to you as you bring the last box in together, watches as your eyes light up at what he says and how you laugh, and ignores the weird twisting inside her chest
after helping you set up your room, she sits on your freshly made up bed, smiling at how homey it already feels
she watches as you move trinkets around on your dresser, smiling to yourself as your hand traces the outlines of each one
“so that guy that was in here earlier,” her mouth is open before her mind decided she wanted to speak, “is he your… boyfriend?”
“oh god, no,” you laugh to yourself, shaking your head with a bright smile, “that’s rudy, he’s gay,” you plop down next to her, smoothing the sheets of your quilted bedsheets as you lean back and get a good look at her, “why? you interested?”
“i’m gay,” she replies, eyes jumping all over your face as if she’s taking you in
she breathes in deeply, smelling your scent coming off of you in waves, vanilla mixed with amber
“oh,” is all you say before looking back at her, your smile a little smaller than the teasing grin you had on earlier, “i also… like women.”
“cool,” ellie breathes out through puffed lips, ignoring how her skin burns with your eyes on her. this was not how it was supposed to be done. you’re supposed to meet the girl  first, fall in love with her, and then move in with her. this was all backward.
ellie pushes herself up off your bed, stuffs her hands in her pockets and turns around, giving you another gentle smile, “i’m gonna get ready for bed,” she lifts up her hand, pointing behind her with her thumb
she almost doesn’t notice your expression drop before you are giving her yet another sickly sweet smile and telling her goodnight
when she gets into her room that night she leans her head back on the door, rubbing her face with a small, “fuck,” coming from her lips
living with you is objectively nice
you get up and make breakfast for the both of you, you buy plants and place them around the apartment, and you get along with her
almost too well, ellie thinks
one night when you are studying together, ellie feels something shift inside her
she’s sitting at one end of the couch, her feet propped up on the coffee table
you’re next to her but your feet are propped up on the small couch, your knees bent
“you’re comfortable like that?” she turns to ask you, watching over your hunched over frame
you just shrug, moving your book away from your face to look at her, “what am i supposed to do? put my feet on you?”
“i don’t mind,” ellie smiles back, grabbing at your ankle to pull your feet over her lap
the gesture has your face burning, but you just shove your face back in your book, hiding your shy smile
ellie notices, and almost throws up when she feels her heart swell at the sight
a month after that ellie wakes up to find you in the kitchen, cooking breakfast as you usually do
except this time you’re wearing only a t-shirt and underwear that show off your as-
“hey els,” you turn on your heal, “morning”
“morning,” she sighs back, biting down the urge to look at your body and sitting at the table scrolling through the phone
she does her best to ignore you, but can’t ignore the little noises you make as you lean up on your tip toes to reach something on a higher shelf,
your shirt riding up, revealing more of your stomach to her
she has to fight to ignore the dampness in her pants as she excuses herself to the bathroom, a need to release it becoming a priority for her
she begins to think you’re teasing her as every morning she wakes up and sees you in the kitchen wearing a different t-shirt and underwear combo that makes her brain mush
“how’s your breakfast?” you ask, digging in before her
“huh?” she asks, looking up at you mouth slightly open
“your breakfast,” you repeat, “how is it?”
“oh, uh,” ellie takes another bite, “it’s good, thanks”
“are you okay?” you ask, taking your own bite, “you’ve been kinda spacey these past few days”
“just a little distracted,” she shrugs, mouth half full
“by?”
“nothing,” she shakes her head, stuffing her mouth full again
“it’s not nothing if you’re distracted,” you reply, challenging her with your arms crossed
she pauses for a beat, looks you up and down, before shaking her head and laughing, “you’re unbelievable,”
a pout forms at your lips as you, open your mouth to speak again, “what does that mean?”
“you know what you’re doing,” she shrugs again, avoiding your eyes the best she can
“what am i doing?” you ask, arms crossed now, looking at her even though she isn’t looking back at you
until she is, eyes seeming to bore a hole through yours, “you walk around wearing practically nothing, you have to know that has some effect on me”
your arms fall to your sides as your mouth opens, “it does?”
“of course, it fucking does,” she bites back, “i’m only human”
“and it distracts you?” 
“sure fucking does,” she’s avoiding your gaze, looking down at her plate of eggs, moving them around the plate
“how?” you ask, making her still
“what do you mean how?” she looks up at you, both slightly scared and turned on by the look in  your eyes
“what are you thinking of when you’re distracted?”
“you. i just sai-”
“what are you thinking about doing to me?” you cut her off and suddenly she realizes the sick game you’re playing with her
she pulls her bottom lip in between her teeth with the lick of her tongue, she takes a shaky breath in and stares at the plate
“i think about…” she pauses, swallowing a lump in her throat before speaking again, “touching you”
“where?” you’re quick with it, not letting her breathe before she continues
she looks up at you, before rolling her eyes, “what is this?”
“where do you think about touching me?” you push your self off the chair, moving to stand in front of her, placing a gentle hand over her hand that was placed on the table, “this okay?” you ask, to which she nods quickly
moving her hand to over your chest, you take a deep breath in, “you think about touching me here?” you ask, a smirk playing on your lips, before moving her hands down your stomach to rest on the space above your panties, “or here?” 
ellie’s breathing is unsteady, as she watches her hand placed right above where it dreamed to be, staring at the damp spot on the fabric that she can only assume is there for her
she nods her head slowly, her fingers curling in the band of the fabric before she’s gently tugging on her
you’re looking down on her, knowing completely what you’re doing and enjoying it
her green eyes look up at you through her lashes, something dark behind them as she pulls you closer to her, just by the waistband alone
you grab onto the back of her head for stability, fingers running through her hair making her lean into the touch, her eyes fluttering closed
she gently tugs down your underwear, till it pools at your feet
she turns in her chair, using both of her hands to grab at your hips, pulling you closer to her
her lips press a gentle kiss to the spot below your bellybutton, before looking back up at you
“you’re so fucking pretty,” she coos, her voice soft, as her hands rub up and down your sides
“don’t want to distract you,” you tease, your fingers still caught up in her hair
“you can distract me when ever you want,”
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authorhjk1 · 17 days
Note
I hope its not much to ask but any chance you can make an Irene short pls? Her photos for her upcoming photobook is driving me nuts lol especially the one where shes lying sideways and looking at the tv.
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You close the door behind you, take your shoes off and walk into the living room.
"You are still up?"
The love of your life lies on the couch in your shared apartment, watching TV. The room is just as dark as the night outside. You hesitate to switch on the lights, the blue shine of the screen illuminating your wife's gorgeous face.
"Of course I am."
It took her a moment to tear her eyes off the screen. But once she looks at you, her face grows softer.
"I always wait for you, when you work late."
"Yeah."
You lose your words, when you realize what Irene is wearing. Several years of marriage and you still can't help but feel like a stupid teenager when she looks this fantastic.
As she gets off the couch, the white shirt or dress slips down her frame. You can't really tell if it's your shirt or her dress, which she brought a couple of weeks ago. It's still dark. But you are disappointed nonetheless. It hides the beautiful curves of her hips.
"I left some of the food in the fridge, if you want me to heat it up for you?"
"I love you."
She smiles back at you, tiptoeing her way around the couch.
"Love you too."
She gives you a peck on your lips, before disappearing into the kitchen.
Once you are inside the bedroom, you quickly get rid off your suit and change into something more comfortable. After a quick stop at the bathroom, you enter the kitchen.
Your wife has already finished reheating the food she made.
"Thank you."
You lean over the kitchen table, kissing Irene's forehead.
"I'm just making sure you are not going to bed hungry."
You shake your head with a big smile on your face as you sit down in front of the meal.
What did you do in your past life to deserve such a woman like her? Caring, beautiful, loving, gorgeous, funny...
The list goes on and on.
As you reach for your fork, the dim light of the fridge makes the golden wedding ring on your finger shine. Irene wanted a fridge with a window in it, so it would be easier for her to see what she needs to buy, without having to open it everytime. Her own ring reflects the blue light as well.
How lucky are you? How is it possible that you are the man who was able to put that ring on her finger?
While you enjoy the food she made, you notice Irene looking at you. Her chin resting on her hand, her elbow on the table. A dreamy smile plays around her lips as she watches you eat.
"Do you have work tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow is Saturday, silly."
"Right."
Irene giggles as you focus back on your food.
"I thought we could do something together. Something in the city."
"What exactly?"
Irene leans a little forward, visibly excited and curious.
"I'll tell you tomorrow."
She pouts at you, leaning back a little.
"Is the cake already gone?"
You notice she didn't give you any as you reach the end of your meal. You don't have to tell her you enjoyed it. She knows it. She watched you the whole time.
"Well..."
Your wife gets off her chair and walks around the table.
"The cake is gone,"
She is now standing next to you, her hand resting on your shoulder. Irene leans down a little to whisper into your ear.
"but I'm sure we can find you something delicious to eat."
Irene kisses you right next to your ear, before walking into the bedroom. You look after her, watching how she moves with grace.
After quickly finishing the meal and putting away the dishes, you arrive at the bedroom door.
Irene is lying on the bed, her head resting on her hand again. She looks at you. But this time it's different. Gone is the loving, caring look she so often wears. It's replaced by a darker, almost evil stare. Her teeth slightly bite into her lower lip as she sees you standing in the doorway.
"Time for dessert, baby."
Despite her whispering, you can clearly hear her voice, dripping with lust.
You immediately get onto the foot of the bed. Grabbing her luscious thighs with your hands, you pull Irene closer. She is moaning already, knowing what's to come.
As you lean down, you suddenly realize that the pantyhose she is wearing is blocking your access. As if she read your mind, your wife shakes her head.
"Don't tear it open again. I have to buy a new one almost weekly."
"Now I know how you spend all my money."
Before she can protest, you rip the thin fabric apart. The loud tearing sound fills your bedroom for just a moment.
"Fuck."
Irene's head sinks into the pillow at your actions. Everytime you do this, she realizes she can just buy a new one.
Pulling her black panties to the side, you are greeted with her pink pussy. It's a meal you have had every day for the last years. A meal you can never grow tired of.
"Oh gosh, baby."
Irene moans as you tease her by kissing and licking her thighs. But when you are so close to her, you can't keep it up for long. Your kisses start to circle around her pussy. You tighten it further and further, until your lips finally meet her clit.
A loud whine echoes through the room. You can tell that Irene is biting her lips, trying to prevent louder sounds from escaping her mouth.
You indulge in your favorite meal. Your favorite dessert. Her most intimate part is yours.
Years of marriage have taught you everything you need to know about your wife. That includes her body. What she feels like, wherever you touch her. How she feels when you touch her. How to touch her. It's all in your mind. As if you wrote a book or painted a map. You know every inch of her skin like it's your own.
Small and quick kisses on her clit make Irene sigh and tug at her own hair her with her hand. Licks along her folds make her whimper, almost shake in anticipation. Burying your tongue inside her snatch makes her moan. Your hands on her thighs, massaging them, makes her melt.
The combination of all of the above makes sure that you give Irene the time of her life. Her flawless body is hit by wave after wave of pleasure. Her mouth can't seem to close and her hand eventually finds your head.
As she pushes you down, her nails digging into your scalp, you know that Irene is trying to fight a lost battle. A battle you've already won. From the moment you first placed your hands on her thighs a couple of minutes ago.
And the sound of victory is your wife's high pitched cry. Irene reaches her high, her mind going blank as her body betrays her. She has no control over it as she squirms and shakes on the sheets. Her wet pussy is dripping with her juices, leaving a wet spot on the sheets beneath her. Well, more like a puddle.
While she still rides out her orgasm, you plant kisses on her clit, almost apologetically.
With her taste still lingering on your lips, you quickly rid yourself of your clothing. Irene's chest rises and falls as she takes heavy breaths.
"Honey..."
She looks up at you. No other words are needed to express her gratitude, her satisfaction, her longing. Her eyes sparkle with lust as she silently begs you to fuck her.
Knowing how wet Irene becomes after her first orgasm, you align yourself with her snatch without any further preparation. You don't have time for that anyway. Her pussy captivates you, every time you catch a glimpse of it.
"Oh, god!"
Irene moans loudly as you push inside of her. Your hands on her thighs push them apart a little, making sure you have one of the most beautiful views anyone could have.
Your wife's gorgeous face twists in pleasure as you start to fuck her. Slow and deep at first, making her gasp, everytime you hit her cervix.
The lewd sounds her mouth makes eventually coax you into thrusting harder and faster. Irene's moans become louder, her thighs are a little shakey once more.
"You're so tight, baby."
You can't help but praise your wife. She is everything a guy would want in a partner and so much more. And her insides are no exception. The way her walls wrap around you, whenever you thrust into her. The way she squeezes your cock, making sure you feel just as good as she does.
The two of you quickly lose track of time. It was already late when you got home. Both of you were already tired from the long day. But this gives you new energy. New passion.
"More, baby."
Irene moans into your ear as she tears open old scratches on your back.
By now you've carried her to the window after finally undressing her completely. The torn pantyhose lying somewhere on the floor. Her bare back is pushed flat against the cold glass, causing goosebumps to cover her skin. Her legs are wrapped around your waist as you keep pounding into her with hard thrusts.
You kiss Irene's neck, making her moan even louder as you find her soft spot with ease. Her walls clench down on your cock at the same time. A not so silent battle about who makes the other person lose first. And losing is not bad at all. By no means. Losing has only one single outcome. Which is, cuming inside your wife. Something you would gladly do the entire day if you could. Something you did do every day, the entire day, when you were on your honeymoon.
"Babe..."
You gladly admit defeat as you keep pushing inside of your wife.
"Yes, baby. M-Me too..."
You feel Irene's walls squeezing and contracting around you. You plan on holding on throughout her orgasm, but you both know it's not meant to be.
With small "Love you"'s and kisses, the both of you cum at the same time. You feel yourself getting drained by Irene's contracting walls as she feels your load painting her insides. The two of you keep hugging each other in a tight embrace as you ride out your climaxes. Irene's usual squirming and shaking is reduced to a twitching of her stomach and abs, which welcome your cum inside her belly.
"I can't wait for another girl."
You chuckle into her neck.
"That's how you spend all my money."
She grins into yours, peppering your skin with kisses.
"Four times is the charm."
After showering together, you open the door at the end of the hallway. Both beds are occupied with two small figures, visibly sleeping. You kiss them both on their foreheads, before entering the room on the right. Your oldest is sound asleep too. She almost looks exactly like her mother.
"Sleep tight."
You whisper, before joining your wife in your bed.
-------------
Thank you for reading everyone!
I hope you guys enjoyed. I'm working on the next pieces, so stay tuned.
This got a little longer than I expected it to be. (As always)
I had to wait for the bus a little longer than usual, so I thought I would give this a shot.
Stay healthy!
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sunsetsimon · 8 months
Text
farmer simon riley ♡
simon 'ghost' riley x reader
this is very self indulgent sorry not sorry! pt 2. boyfriend simon nsfw will be out tomorrow!
─────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───────
☼ he wakes up at the crack of dawn every morning, kissing your forehead before he starts his routine. rinsing his face, shaving if he needs to, brushing his teeth, the usual. simon doesn’t listen to much music when he’s alone, but the silence grounds him, a reminder that this is his life now. he does a lot of reflecting, sitting on the porch and drifting off in his mind.
☼ as the sun comes up he gets to work, feeding the animals one by one. he talks to them and names them. he acts annoyed when the ducks follow him, quacking at him for him to hurry up and give them their feed. “god dammit, fucking ducks back up!” he grunts, kicking his leg out to keep them back as he fills the bucket.
he makes his round to each animal, giving them a pat and checking that they have everything they need before leaving. by the time he makes his way back to the house, he can tell you're up. the curtains are drawn and the front door is propped open, letting in the fresh morning air. he knows he'll find you in the back garden with a wicker basket on your arm, trying to decide what to make for breakfast.
"how about omelettes this morning, love? somethin' simple, wanna spend some time with you," he says, pulling your back against him, his fingers slipping under the hem of your shirt and caressing your skin.
☼ always drives you into town when you want to go. he’s like your personal body guard, so unless you tell him otherwise, he expects to be next to you the entire time. spoils you so much too, letting you buy whatever you want without a fuss, he has the money for it.
☼ he buys whole cow from one of his cattle friends and learns to cook different recipes with the meat. simon definitely becomes one of those ‘griller guys’ who finds any excuse to grill or smoke meat. he has a lot of fun with it, trying out new recipes and techniques to see which produces the best results. he loves cooking together with you, thinks you look so cute in your “kiss the chef” apron he got you.
☼ having the boys or your friends over for meals. ghost is anything but a socialite, but he does have the boys over a few times a year for a small cookout. you get so excited every time, ready to hear all the stories soap and gaz talk about, even though they definitely shouldn’t be sharing the information. they try to keep it lighthearted, making positive memories with each other outside of work is rare. he never says it, but simon has a good time whenever they come.
☼ indulges in a lot of hobbies. shooting, wood working, gardening and more. he has to do something to occupy his time now. there’s a small building on your property that he renovated into his work room. tools cover the walls, and his projects sit on the tables until he finishes them. he spends the nights he can’t sleep in there, distracting himself with work so that he doesn’t think about the things that haunt him. you wake up to an empty bed in the middle of the night and look out the window, seeing the lights on in the distant building. sighing, you roll out of bed and put on your fuzzy robe that he got you for winter.
you open the large door, revealing simon sitting at one of his tables, his gun taken apart and splayed across it. “si, it’s 2 in the morning, come to bed,” you say, walking over and softly petting the hair on the back of his neck.
“i will soon, just gotta finish this.” you frown at him, giving him a knowing look that he doesn’t actually plan on being done soon. unmoving from your spot, he sighs and wipes off his hands, throwing the towel down. “okay, ‘m coming.” his hand reaches under the table, grabbing a 2nd gun and tucking it into the holster in his pants.
you roll your eyes, “my god.. do you just have those everywhere?”
“yes.”
☼ homegrown flower bouquets during the spring and summer, simon makes it a point to make you a fresh one every week. he cuts the stems and puts it in a vase for you, leaving it on the kitchen counter for you to see when you come down. he does everything he can to make you feel special because you’re the light of his life. sometimes he builds you things too! making mental notes whenever you talk about wanting something, he spends night after night in his workroom to make it perfect for you.
☼ loves sitting on your porch and watching the sun set with you. after dinner, he’ll pull you out onto the porch, sitting next to you with a glass of whiskey. simon doesn’t say anything, just staring off and enjoying your presence. you can feel his eyes on you occasionally, watching as the sun casts it’s oranges, pinks, and reds across your face. you look so beautiful and peaceful here.
☼ never expected this to be his life but he’s happy with the way it is. he can never get too bored though, always needing to do something. the winters can be tough on him mentally as there’s less to do in the cold, so he picks up reading and is constantly finishing projects around the house. he just wants you to be safe and by his side, forever.
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pseudowho · 6 months
Text
The JJK Boys Catch You Wearing This...
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...after they tell you to put on that little red number you have.
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Yuuji: Walking through the doorway and calling out to you, Yuuji peeks in the bedroom. As you see him, you stick out one high-heeled leg seductively, pointing your toes and giving a suggestive wiggle.
Yuuji absolutely falls apart with laughter, grasping the doorframe for support as tears pour down his face. Tries to talk, but every time he looks at you, he breaks down again.
Finally, stopping to wipe his eyes, he asks: "But did you get me one, too?"
You had, obviously.
Higuruma: "Hey, I'm home!" he calls out to you, throwing his suitcase down and yanking his shirt collar loose. He hears you call him from the bathroom, and pads down, walking in, "It's been a shit and unsuccessful day as usual, but you know what they say--"
You are in the bath, wearing only this, legs draped over the side as you ask him, in your best seductive voice, "Have you ever taken a bath in your clothes, Mr.Higuruma?"
Hiromi stares flatly at you for five seconds. Sighing, he does his shirt back up, turns back to the door and picks up his suitcase.
"Hiromi-- hey-- where are you going?"
"Back to work. There are actually fewer criminals there."
Suguru: Arriving home, sounding tired and resigned, he shouts out to you, "Babe! Is dinner sorted, or do you want me to cook?"
"No, it's okay, I've cooked!"
Heaving a happy sigh-- "ahh, amazing" -- Suguru hustles to the kitchen, "What's for--"
He stops, as there you stand, one stockinged leg up on the kitchen chair as you lean forward, bum wiggling, and--
*click*
You turn to Suguru, your warped cloth face somehow looking absolutely horrified; "Was that...did you just take a photo? Suguru?! Suguru!"
He runs. You'd better believe every mutual friend in Suguru's contact list is receiving that gem.
Nanami: Expensive brown shoes clack on the floor towards the living room-- "Sorry I'm late. I've missed you so much"-- excited to see you and that gorgeous little red--
You are in Nanami's favourite armchair, stockinged legs crossed, heeled foot twiddling, wearing some red monstrosity, and even worse, you've draped one of his ties round your neck--
"Why are you like this?" Nanami huffs, exhausted, deflating. You giggle, shaking with mirth.
"Did Gojo buy you that...thing? I'll pay you to take that off."
Later that evening, you come out of the bathroom to the smell of smoke. Kento stands in the garden, sleeves rolled up, stoking your red costume in the fire pit.
Gojo: "I'm pretty sure I've fought Curses that look like you before," Gojo grinned, arms and legs crossed and leant against the doorframe as you strutted around the living room, laughing to yourself. You moved to remove the costume, satisfied with your joke--
"Ah ah ah, you're not done yet." Your bizarre costumed face stares quizzically at Gojo, who settles on the sofa, legs spread, unzipping his trousers with a wink. He grabs his phone, and puts on some music.
"Dance, cutie. And you'd better believe you can keep that on the whole time."
Toji: You squealed, costumed face hitting the pillows as Toji threw you hard onto the bed, bouncing on your hands and knees. You move to turn, and Toji turns you back round, smacking your bare arse as you squeak again, laughing.
"Dunno what you're laughing about, babe. I've fucked girls uglier than that mask of yours. Face down, arse up."
Sukuna: "I've killed for less than this, woman. Get undressed. Now."
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I'm meant to be writing the next chapter of a thrilling romantic drama. I offer no apologies for myself, I'm ridiculous.
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nochukoo97 · 8 months
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beside you
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pairing: idol!jungkook x gf!reader
summary: you miss your boyfriend after not seeing him for a long time, so who could blame you if you couldn’t resist him once you saw him?
warnings/tags: MINORS DNI, dom!jk, sub!oc, established relationship, oc is a little whiny and desperate oops, riding, missionary, oc has an iud but it isn’t mentioned, lots of kissing, jk buys oc a pair of ck underwear 🥹, aftercare, jk calls her pretty girl and baby :((, they miss each other so much, a little i love you moment halfway :))
word count: 2.1k+
beside you; keshi: it’s just you and i, and no other guys, we got no interruptions and we both feelin’ the vibe
You find yourself sitting in a random coffee shop, your mood clouded by a deep sense of longing. Your fingers trace the rim of the coffee cup, the warm ceramic comforting in your hands. Leaning your head against your palm, you release a heavy sigh, your eyes fixated on the half-diluted coffee that you had paid an hefty price for, “I miss my boyfriend,”
Beside you, Chaeyong, your roommate of four years, gives you an amused look. She rolls her eyes playfully and nudges the plate of pastries closer, urging you to take another bite.
Chaeyong's comment brings a pout to your lips. “You say that every time he's out of your sight,” she remarks, her voice tinged with affectionate exasperation.
A small whine of frustration escapes your lips as you respond, “But I was so excited to see him yesterday when he landed in the evening, and I fell asleep! And by the time I woke up this morning, he had left for another schedule.”
Chaeyong tries to console your sullen mood, “But you'll see him later today, right?”
You nod, but it's accompanied by another heavy sigh. The mere thought of having to wait a little longer to be reunited with Jungkook deepens your yearning for him. Your heart aches with the anticipation of the moment when you can finally hold him close and simply spend time with him.
You’ve been separated from Jungkook for a good week or so because of his promotions in America, and as much as you tried to keep an optimistic mindset while living away from your boyfriend, there was a major part of you that simply craved for his presence to be back.
For example, when you ate breakfast in the morning, there was no Jungkook sitting beside you to annoy you with the most random facts he’s learnt, or throughout the day, there was no Jungkook singing random tunes to songs that filled the apartment, and most of all, there was no Jungkook to cuddle up next to you and help you sleep.
Frankly, the dark under eyes clearly showing through your skin is evident of Jungkook’s absence for the past week. It’s been more than rough for you, considering you’ve been spoilt by Jungkook’s cooking that a mere packet of instant noodles can even taste bland.
“Then just text him to see when you can meet,” Chaeyong is a genius, you didn’t think of that.
you: hi baby
you: i miss you :((((((((((
Chaeyong’s been curiously peering at your phone screen, as you type out a message to your boyfriend. A wry grin tugs at your lips, but your amusement quickly turns into a grumble as her scrutinizing eyes zero in on your texting style.
“Yuck, that’s how you text him?” She inquires, her tone mixed with amusement and faux disgust.
“Get a boyfriend and then you’ll understand,” You scoff, retorting at her as you kick her shin from under the table, earning a hiss from your roommate.
jungkook: hi my pretty girl :)
jungkook: miss you too
jungkook: just finished my filming and im done for the day, wanna come over to my studio? 😘
“This is the part where I get abandoned here isn’t it,” Chaeyong deadpans as she reads the text Jungkook had sent back, the text itself already making you light up and gasp in excitement.
“Chaeyong,” You look her directly in the eyes, pleading with your roommate, “You know how much I love you but right now, I need to get to my boyfriend like asap,”
“Fine, fine, go ahead, you better do the same for me when I get a boyfriend,” She rolls her eyes at you, as you quickly spew a string of thank-you-you’re-the-best-in-the-whole-wide-world, before grabbing your bag to drive over to his company building.
-
Breathless and filled with anticipation, you swing the door to Jungkook's studio open, paying no heed to the quiet click of the latch. The space is awash in a soft glow from the artistic lamps scattered across the room. Your heart races as you spot your boyfriend, Jungkook, sitting in the swivel chair in front of his cluttered desk.
Eager and almost stumbling in your haste, you bound towards him, your footsteps echoing throughout the studio. The swivel chair creaks ever so slightly as you launch yourself into his lap, an exclamation escaping your lips.
“Hi, oof-” He huffs when you jump into his lap, arms wrapping around his muscular back as you sigh in relief.
Jungkook smiles at you affectionately, his face illuminated with a soft glow from his monitor that he had been previously focused on, but your sudden arrival was a much better thing to concentrate on at this point.
“Hi pretty girl,” He greets you properly this time, his own arms wrapping around your smaller body as he chuckles at your playful behaviour.
“Did you have fun? You’re all dressed up,” Your boyfriend takes notice of the flowy dress you’re wearing, the light makeup you had put on and how your hair had been parted half up half down. Jungkook thinks you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen, the sight of you all dolled up does things to his heart.
“Yeah, me and Chaeyong went to a cafe, but goddamn the coffee was not worth it,” You begin to ramble on about the aesthetic looking cafe, filled with cute little plants and flowers and even a cat, and Jungkook listens attentively, watching your expression switch each time you talk.
“And she helped me take pictures for my Instagram too,” You tell him, arms wrapping around his neck as you touch your nose with his for a split second.
“Yeah? Show me them,” He muses, waiting for you to retrieve your phone from the bag that had been hastily thrown onto his couch in the studio, right before you had launched yourself onto him.
“Later,” A whine pulls from your throat as you inch closer to him, if that was even possible, your legs hanging from either side of his thighs as you straddle his lap, “I missed you so much,”
“Missed you too baby,” He mumbles against your lip as you lean down to kiss him, a little more desperate than usual.
Jungkook bites onto your bottom lip mid-kiss, making you part your lips with a soft gasp in surprise, he takes the opportunity to slide his tongue in, hands reaching to hold the back of your neck.
You feel the heat rushing down, it’s been a week since you had last kissed Jungkook, a week since you’ve been in physical contact with him. At this point you’re so desperate for him you don’t try to hide it, softly grinding against his growing bulge under his jeans, making the man under you groan.
“Such a little minx,” His hands fall down to slip under the hem of your dress, stroking your thighs gently as you whine into the kiss.
“Need you,” You’re panting against his lips, desperate for him to do something, anything, you’ll take anything at this point, “Please,”
“Yeah? Tell me what you want baby,” He squeezes your waist, doing nothing but sitting there with a stupid grin while you rut against him desperately, slick soaking through your panties already.
“Kook,” Another whine escapes your mouth as you shamelessly let out a soft moan when you grind over a particular spot that rubs your sensitive clit. Fuck, you’re about to go crazy from all the teasing he’s doing.
“Tell me pretty girl, use your words,”
“Want to ride you,” You pant some more, head buried into his neck as you gasp when he shuffles a little under you.
You tug at his shirt, signaling for him to remove it as you remove your dress at the same time, exposing the CK underwear set he had bought you recently.
“Fuck, my pretty girl,” Jungkook might just be drooling at the sight in front of him, you’re insane for showing up to his studio and making him so desperate for you.
He slides a finger along your covered slit, hissing when the wet fabric touches his skin. You don’t give him time to comment on anything, crashing your lips back in his as you tug his pants and underwear off, making him do the same for you after.
“Let me stretch you out baby,” He whispers against your ear, hissing when your hand wraps around the base of his cock.
“No, ‘sokay, I just need you now,” Your whining at this point because all you want is Jungkook’s cock buried in your dripping cunt, but he’s been purposefully riling you up and teasing you so much, you’ll take matters into your own hands.
He gives you an amused smile, clearly entertained by this new side of you, desperate for his touch.
You angle his cock towards your slit as you slowly sink down, gasps coming from both of your mouths.
“Fuck- So tight-” Jungkook grits through his teeth, hands finding their way to your bare ass as he gives it a tight squeeze, before reaching back up to unclasp your bra.
You support your weight by pressing your palms against his bare chest, moving upwards before sinking back down on his cock, moans from the both of you sounding throughout his studio, but thank goodness for his soundproof walls, or the both of you would have been caught by now.
“Baby, please, more,” Jungkook coos at you in a whiny state, his own cock throbbing as your hole clenches around it over and over again.
He lifts the both of you up, shoves your bag away before placing you down on the couch, his much larger body now hovering over yours.
“Hnnghh!” A muffled moan emits from you as Jungkook ruts into your soaking pussy, head lowering down to kiss you deeply. Your sensations are all over the place, body sensitive and overstimulated from not having any action for the past week.
“Yeah? Good baby?” He whispers, making you nod in response. Jungkook watches in awe as your eyes roll back at a particular thrust, your hair forming a halo around your head, lips swollen as you take all of him.
“S-So good, so fucking good, I love you-” You’re a mess, stuttering over your words as your boyfriend fucks you into oblivion, his cock thrusting into that sensitive spot inside you that makes your thighs shake in pleasure.
“I love you,” He kisses down the valley of your breasts, thrusts increasing in speed as the both of you reach closer to your climax. Jungkook’s moans get louder, his groans more throaty as his eyebrows furrow.
“So close, so close, please! Hah-” You think you’re drooling right now, he’s hitting all the right spots, making your vision go blurry as you’re overwhelmed with pleasure.
With one particular harsh thrust, he lets out a guttural groan from above you as the both of your climax, his warm seed shooting into your pussy.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck-” Jungkook’s almost whining as he ruts into you, desperate pants leave his mouth as his thrusts slow down, pulling out, his body collapsing on top of you as he catches his breath.
“Shit, you’re insane,” He pants, head burying into your neck as you giggle at his hair that tickles your skin slightly, “Did so well for me baby, so good,”
“Feel so good, missed you,” You whisper, hands roaming his back as you soothe the scratches from your sharp nails that painted his back.
“And your cock,” You add on, making Jungkook snort above you.
“Couldn’t tell at all baby,” He muses, lifting his head to peck your cheek, then the corner of your lips. “We need to clean up,” He sighs, watching some of his cum slowly drip out, threatening to fall onto his couch.
You let Jungkook get off you, watching as he quickly fetches the wet wipes that he keeps on his desk, gently cleaning you up as he peppers kisses to your stomach.
“Best welcome back present I’ve received to be honest, 10/10,” He teases you as he hands back your clothes, helping you put them back on.
“What about that time when I literally surprised you with a cake?” You nudge his bare shoulder, a faux frown plastered on your face.
“Baby, the cake was half raw, we both had food poisoning for a week after that,” He taunts you, making you gasp dramatically.
“It’s the thought that counts! You try to make a cake from scratch then!”
“Deal, I’ll bake you a cake tonight, watch out, because I’ve been watching a ton of Nailed It!” He tells you, pulling his shirt over his head to put it back on.
Jungkook does indeed bake the best tasting cake you’ve ever eaten in your life, proving your point wrong.
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lolokouhm · 8 months
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thinking about Megumi, who opens his eyes instantly when his alarm goes off in the morning, but turns it off even faster when he sees you - your head and chest laying heavy on his torso, hair falling out from your messy bun, sleeping like a baby. and apparently drooling a little.
thinking about Megumi, who stiffens, suddenly feeling a huge sense of responsibility for your quality sleep. he really hopes his heart doesn’t beat too loud, especially when it seems to have grown twice in size since you started staying in his apartment more and more often. he didn’t think it’d be as amazing - to wake up next to you (or under you, or inside of you) in his bedroom, a place not many others have seen or even been to. once, just once, he let drunk Itadori sleep there and that was a complete disaster. Megumi likes to keep it simple, quiet and calm, and for some reason his friends are like hurricanes and they just come in, bring on a complete disaster and leave without cleaning up after themselves. you too have brought some chaos into his life - with your pink toothbrush, a concerning amount of face masks and serums you squirrelled away in the drawer in his bathroom and some random pieces of lingerie that get him flustered every time he takes them out of the laundry machine. A warm smile crawls on his face - he hides his arms back under the black sheets and lets them travel gently down your body. he has no idea how you ended up in this position, but feels more than happy to be able to make you feel this good and relaxed. the room is cold, but you are not and Megumi thrives on that feeling.
thinking about Megumi, who gulps as his hands suddenly lose the cotton surface of his T-shirt on you and they end up on your bare skin. you apparently forgot to put on the panties, but that’s more than understandable - that’s the Fushiguro effect for you. and well, you like being a tease. you’re testing him now, not fully aware of that fact, as Megumi closes his eyes and bites his lower lip. it’s quite contradicting - his imagination starts to go a little wild, long, slender fingers brushing against you, barely even, as he’s trying to ignore the growing bulge in his boxers at the same time. unfortunately for Megumi, you’re starting to wiggle, and with the feeling of your lower parts pressing on his morning wood… shit. luckily for you, he’s a gentleman - he’s not going to do anything improper, especially when you’re sleeping. he's not an animal. at least, most of the time.
thinking about Megumi, who's slowly but steadily losing his fight as keeps on caressing your skin, hands sliding to you inner thighs. he closes his eyes - it's unfair. your skin can't be just skin - it's velvet. touching you feels as if he was touching some God-made material, shipped straight from heaven. if he asked you about it you'd probably say something about that overpriced cinnamon body lotion you were so excited to buy, but he wouldn't believe you. he doesn't know what answer would be satisfying, but that just makes him smile again. he's already had his own answer to that.
thinking about Megumi, who groans quietly when you move up his body, hiding your face right into his neck. your wet lips nuzzle the skin right next to his aorta and he can feel the blood pulsing against you. yeah, he's gonna be late, but fuck it. he'll call in sick. this whole situation is, after all, a serious life hazard - if you bit him right there, he could die. Megumi chuckles and closes his eyes with a sleepy grin. if the death has to come one day, he prays it'll look like that. pretty, sleepy, half-naked.
and a little bit drooly.
masterlist ❤️
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eee-lordy · 4 months
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Practice Makes Perfect
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!!! nsfw minors dni !!!
Jacob offers to help fem!reader get her first time over with. 6k
───※ ·❆· ※───
"Ready for your big move?" Jacob huffed, dropping a particularly heavy box onto the top of another. He'd come over to help you start packing up, you had a week left.
"Mostly, yeah I think so." You grinned, knowing he was talking more about emotionally than materialistically. Your eyes scanned the bare bones of your first apartment. It had been a welcoming and safe space for a handful of years now, but the time had come to move onto bigger and better things.
"Let's drink to the beginning of the end, then, shall we?" Your dearest pal declared, toting over glasses and liquor from your fridge.
"Don't say it like that, nothings ending here." You warn, sick at the thought of there being a time limit on your friendship once a little space got in the way. Jacob sat next to you on the sofa, pouring you each a drink.
"Okay sorry, we'll toast to now, then. May we enjoy every moment." Jacob's sincerity past the silly tone he used warmed your confounded heart. So many feelings had plagued you since finding out about your big move. How excited you were for the fresh start, and how you were, in fact, dreading leaving behind everything you loved so dearly, everyone.
As you sat and drank, it was all Jacob could talk about. He asked you all kinds of questions. What the place was like you were headed to, how you may come to decorate the home you were set to buy. How you may plan to spend your time. You fawned over descriptions of some new furniture you'd had shipped to your new place. And excitedly quipped about the plans you were making for the distant future.
"I hope to just go wild. Create a whole new thing for myself, ya know? Try everything, live to the fullest." The realizations that you could become whoever you wanted most to be in an all new place had your imagination running wild since theses plans became solid.
"And what are you most nervous about?" Jacob countered, squinting as if he knew this question was one that might really challenge you.
"Oh... I don't know." You feigned a laugh, hoping your face hadn't flushed red. Because you had been increasingly nervous about one thing, fretting over the many outcomes your imagination brought to life every time you wondered how to take on this certain situation...
"Ohhhh no." Jacob grinned wickedly, shifting in his seat to face you a little more head on, pointing his half full beer in your direction. "There is something, I know when you aren't telling me things, you know?"
"Jacob, can we please drop this?" You plead, feeling like sinking in on yourself for letting your facade drop for even a second.
"All I'm saying is, if you're this nervous about something, maybe I can help?"
"I highly doubt you can help with this one, dude." You let out a mortified giggle, feeling your blush coming back tenfold.
"Hey." Jacob lowered his tone, cocking his head to catch your eye. His were serious. "You know you can tell me whatever it is-"
"Is embarrassing-"
"And I won't judge you. You know that." And you did know. Jacob had told you his own mortifying confessions, from the time he'd lost his clothes in a sketchy overnight gym, to the salacious dreams he'd had about certain unattractive costar way back before you knew him. As you reminded yourself of the story Jacob once told you of his mishap with a zipper during the first night he spent in the bed of a lady, you realized you could tell him what was on your mind.
"Okay fine." You gritted through your teeth, clasping your hands together only to anxiously wring them. Jacob stayed quiet and awaited your words.
"I'm most nervous about having sex." You declared. "Because I'm more than ready to get out there and do it, but the thought of sleeping with some stranger is appalling, and I don't know who I trust enough to ask to see me through that awfully awkward first time. And what if I never meet someone I trust enough, just-" With a disgruntled sigh, you realized you were rambling.
"You're a virgin?" Jacob's mouth twisted into a confounded frown as his head turned much like a baffled puppy dog. Your friends studying of you made you want to slip into nonexistence.
"So what?" You huffed a nervous laugh, daring to meet Jacob's piercing eyes for the first time since revealing your secret.
"It's just I thought you'd have done it, like... a lot." He shrugged. "Being so smokin' hot, and all."
"I am not hot, Elordi, and despite really being ready, I'm way too nervous to do it. That's the whole issue here." You scoffed, taking a frustrated swig of your drink.
"Uh, yeah you are. And what is there to be nervous about, anyway?" He quizzed.
"What if I do the wrong thing or say something weird or just make a complete fool of myself? Or what if I hate it? I'm ready for it. But I really am scared I will never meet the right person to deal with how in my head I am about this..."
Jacob let his gaze fall to the floor, seeming to puzzle over your words. A considerable amount of silence settled about the room before either of you spoke again. He was the one to break that silence.
"Do you... trust me?"
Your eyes widened and your stomach tied itself into a knot.
"I mean, you know I think you're attractive. So, I won't care or even notice if you make a complete fool of yourself. And we know all each other's secrets. That's trust. And if you hate it, we stop. I'm kind of the perfect candidate her, love." His confidence had blossomed with the help of the drinks you two had shared tonight. Jacob spoke with assuredness, letting no signs of awkwardness show in his daring offer. The whole thing had your head spinning.
"Jacob."
"All I'm saying is... if you want, I'm down. If not, I get it." He took a swig, the last of his third glass. "I'm just saying..." Jacob let his sharp dark eyes rake across your figure as you sat in place, trying not to squirm. You considered the expression in his gaze, clearly drinking you in, yet keeping a respectable distance.
"I'll... think about it." And you really would.
He nodded. You nodded. He got up and turned on a movie. You went searching for more to drink. As some rather boring action flick unfolded on your telly, your mind raced. You did trust Jacob. You did find him attractive too. With his angelic features and fit figure. And you wouldn't mind if this little... experiment led to something a little more serious either. But that was a wild far off distant dream. And still, all the things that mortified you about doing it with a stranger made you just as nervous to consider in the company of one of your closest friends.
"It would just be, like, educational right? Just... one friend helping out another?" You pipped up in the middle of the action movies climax.
"It would be whatever you needed or wanted it to be, doll. I'm offering my sincerest assistance." Jacob spoke easily, keeping his apparent focus on the telly screen, settled an inch away from where you sat on the sofa.
You hummed in understanding, acknowledging how both of you kept your eyes glued to the movie on your screen, and that seemed soothing. There didn't seem to be any pressure, there didn't seem to be any stakes. And as you considered your nerves, you wondered if the feeling was more that of anxious wonder. And then you realized there was a way to test this theory...
"Kiss me. Then I'll know." You thought out loud.
"Know what?"
"If you're a shitty kisser or not. And if I'd even dream of letting you sleep with me." You were drunk enough to speak without consideration. You were curious enough to take Jacob up halfway on his offer. You really hoped he wasn't a shitty kisser. You may have let him have his way with you even if he was.
With a decided shrug Jacob leaned in. His lips were soft, the gentle way he pressed his against yours was more than comfortable. You let yourself relax into pressing your own kiss back, and he took that as a signal to deepen his display of affection. And the kiss that began as a seemingly casual interaction took a different form. Jacob let his lips slowly open, encouraging yours to do the same. As your kissing grew longer and deeper, your very dear friend let his fingers reach to brush your hair back; then let his digits press against the base of your neck to pull your lips ever closer.
The gentle forcefulness Jacob commanded brought a contented sigh from your throat, and your friend's smile in response broke your interaction.
"I'll take that as a yes?" He smirked, eyes focusing on yours close up.
"It's just... a lot to consider."
He had kept his hold on you. His hand clutching the back of your head, his thumb rubbing soothing circles against your hair.
"Listen. I won't push this on you. It's no sweat if you decide against it. But I really would be very patience and more than glad to help you out here. That's the last I'll speak of it. Now, what are we watching next?"
You spent the rest of that evening next to Jacob in mutual silence. You watched films until your friend grew tired and called it a night. All the while your mind raced from one scenario to the next. Wondering what the worst could turn out to be, if you said yes, or no.
///
Jacob stopped by one night later, saying he was simply in the neighborhood and wondered if you'd needed any kind of help continuing to pack up. So, you put him to work, cleaning out drawers and folding clothes into suitcases. You talked a lot while working, about eachothers lives and dreams and silly things. But the conversation kept leading back to the topic of your move.
"I'll be hours away from all my family and it's not like I won't see them but I'll be so alone you know?" You confessed your fears for living in solitude and worrying over worst case scenarios.
"Hey, you'll make it just fine. You don't give yourself enough credit." Jacob insisted, moving about your room from one task to another. "Plus, I'm only one phone call away."
"I know." You whispered, peering up to your friend through your lashes, biting back a frown. You set a roll of tape and a box cutter on a nearby shelf, done with the tools for now.
"This is supposed to be a good thing, a happy thing." Jacob reminded you, shuffling to stand before you. He reached out to tilt your chin upward as if that would encourage a smile from you.
"I know." You whispered again. And with no way of knowing who leaned in first, all you knew was Jacob was kissing you again. And you relished the comfort of his affection. Nothing stopped you now from slinking a lazy arm around his neck as the guy let his grasp splay across your back.
Jacob was the first to break away, like before. But unlike then, he said nothing now. Jacob just leaned back far enough to catch your eye, as one of his brows lifted in a silent question.
"I think I might want to take you up on your offer..." You seemed to realize out loud. Maybe you had always wanted it to be him. Or maybe his encouragement had done the trick of talking you into feeling this way now. But you were never surer about being intimate with someone than now, with the way your dearest friend held you in his arms.
"Yeah?" He nodded with a furrow in his brow.
"Yes, I- if you're really sure." You stuttered.
"I am if you are." Jacob continued to nod. And after a beat, when he asked "Like, now? Right now?" You moved to nod along with him, even though your heart threatened to leap from your chest.
"Okay." He whispered. "You just need to tell me if it gets all too much, no matter what. Promise me you will."
"Yeah. I'm, like, really nervous. That's the big problem. But I trust you, so I am very sure."
"Well, I can certainly help with that." Jacob brought a hand to your hair, "I think." He lightly chuckled, pulling a face, setting your nerves at ease already.
"We'll just go very slow. How does that sound?" He asked, still keeping a hand rested on the side of your head, while his other crept down to the bend of your waist. You let out a held breath and nod assuredly.
"Okay." You flickered a smile. Jacob nodded too, his lithe grin remaining as he searched your face, his eyes landing on your lips. You hadn't fully expected him to agree to this, and you hadn't at all expected things to start right off the bat. But you couldn't complain when Jacob closed the gap and pressed a gently feather light kiss to your lips. As he did so, he tucked a bit of your hair behind your ear, and ever so slightly tightened his grip at the bend of your waist.
This resulted in your hands finding his shoulders, resting them between there and his chest- where you wondered if you were feeling your own rapid heartbeat in your palms, or his.
His lips left yours for a moment, but another feather light kiss came soon after. A couple more small steady pecks made you comfortable enough to fully relax in the hold Jacob was beginning to wrap around you; his hand moving to hold the back of your head, his other moving from the bend of your waist so his arm circled around you.
When your arms slid into a loose hold around the guy's neck again, his kisses started to ever so slightly deepen. His tongue teased your lips, his thumb caressed soothing circles against your rib cage, a delightful hum escaped his throat.
"This okay so far?" Jacob wondered in a hushed rumble, meeting your eyes between kisses. You nodded and softly smiled, waiting for the guy to continue. When he dove back in, his kisses deepened even further, his tongue pressed against yours, his hold tightening, pulling you almost entirely against himself. You stayed like that for what felt like forever, just kissing and letting hands roam against backs and through hair.
He'd barely done as much as hold you close, but you were already feeling the hot coil of desire burning low in your belly, and it was starting to spread every place else. Your every nerve was already on end.
"I could gladly do this all night." Jacob hummed, moving his kisses to pepper your jaw, and then down your neck. "But would you like to go any further? You tell me, doll."
"Sure, we can go further. I just need you to guide me through." You blew out another shaky breath, trying to release the jitters.
"I can do that. Just remember you can tell me to stop anytime for any reason." Jacob kissed your forehead and waited for you to nod in agreement. He kissed your cheek and then your lips, and let his hands begin to roam new territory. his fingers grazed under the hem of your shirt, brushing against the skin of your hips, skin that had never been touched by anyone but yourself until now. It was starting.
"Can I take this off, doll? I'll take mine off too. We'll be on the same page." Jacob sighed into your mouth, and couldn't resist kissing you between words. He left one set of fingers creeping under your shirt while the other gently tugged at the garment.
"I like that idea." You smiled, his lips brushing against yours in a phantom kiss.
He opted for his first, shedding his tee in a lazy fashion, revealing a sight you had seen before, his bare chest. But now was different from the hot summer days you'd been near the guy in such a state. Now you were free to oggel his frame entirely. 
Jacob watched you watching him as he delicately took hold of the base if your shirt, and pulled it up. You lifted your arms instinctively and tried not to shiver in an anxious display of vulnerability.
The man you'd come to trust tossed aside your favorite old concert tee and brought both his hands to the bare skin of your waist. He'd see you in swimsuits and crop tops but he'd never been so close. Never had his hot skin been so easily accessible under your touch. Never had he caressed you in such a state. The pair of you stood there, holding each other in a delicate morphing clasp, for a brief moment. Your breathing synchronized before Jacob nuzzled against your neck and mumble something about how beautiful he thought you looked, and how lovely he thought it was to hold you so close like this. It was almost too sweet, his musings and the gentle way he held you. But the pecks he placed against your neck turned into something fiercer, his teeth grazing, his breathing audible. All the while, his caresses turned too, his fingers pressed possessive against your skin, one hand moving to bring your hips as close to his as possible.
You let it happen, dragging your nails across his shoulder blades and letting out a delighted sigh. You knew this was supposed to be a fun positive experience. But you felt quite unprepared for how much you were enjoying yourself.
Jacob planted another sloppy kiss to your lips, encouraging you to match his energy.
He began to drag you a few steps in another direction, never daring to break away from the kiss you were sharing, until he had to. Jacob eased onto the side of your bed, gently pulling you into his lap. He maneuvered you into a straddle you were happy to settle into, leaving no space between the two of you, as your kisses continued.
"This all okay, doll?" Jacob hoped, as his warm hand made its way toward your breasts, still covered.
"Yes Jacob," you breathed, taking your turn in moving kisses down the man's neck, not totally sure of your execution but lead by passion what could go so wrong, you wondered?
To your delight, Jacob practically melted under your bites and licks, and you were beginning to melt a little yourself, as he kneaded at your bra.
"You can take it off. If you want." You sighed, keeping up your work at his neck, moving from one side to the other.
"Oh, I've wanted to for a longer than you know." He let out a little laugh after his confession.
You sat up to meet his gaze, asking a question with one look.
"You know I've always thought you were beautiful. But I have always wondered just how much more beautiful under all your clothes." Jacob mewled, unclasping your bra after two tries. You let the thing fall away and slide down one arm to the floor, as Jacob ogled you shamelessly. Somehow the moment didn't cause you nearly as much nervousness as you'd anticipated. The way Jacob was handling this new interaction, the way he'd been handling you; caused your nerves that kept arising the settle, provoking much more excitement than you knew you were capable of feeling in a time like now.
"Even more beautiful than my imagination has been able to conceive." Jacob grinned up to you before rolling his eyes closed on his mission to cover you in kisses.
You couldn't hold back your sigh, one you'd never heard yourself make. A noise you didn't know you were capable of producing. Jacob's lips closed around one of your nipples while he let his hand attend to the other. You could feel his pants tightening beneath you, and his messy hair tangled in your fingers as you grasped at something to ground you. Things were moving at a steady pace yet seemed to be rocketing into progression much quicker than you were prepared for.
"Jacob." You reluctantly halted him, grabbing his attention away from making you feel so good. "Jacob, I don't want to stop, but can we slow down a little?" You asked in a shaky breath, watching your chest rise and fall rapidly, like you'd just run a mile.
"Of course." He promised, planting closed mouth kisses across your collarbone. "Come'er."
Jacob pushed you from his lap to the middle of the bed and adjusted himself behind you, as you took in a couple deep breaths. Then his hands found your shoulders, and began to massage the tense muscle there.
"Are you still nervous? More or less? What can I do to help?"
"Still nervous. But you've been very patient so far and I can't imagine doing this with anyone else. Thank you, Jacob."
"You're practically a natural," Jacob purred in your ear, keeping up his work on your shoulders. You began to feel more at ease under his touch, and more ecstatic by his words and the tone of his voice. "Nothing to be nervous about."
Your hum gave him a green light to follow his hands with his lips, kissing the trail of his massaging.
He soon let his hands start to wander, keeping his face in the crook of your neck as his hands trailed lightly across your chest and tummy, stalling for a brief second at the hem of your pants before ghosting back up to brush at your already exposed skin.
You flipped around crawling into a position closer, moving to undo the button of his pants.
"You sure?" Jacob asked quickly, waiting for you to nod before shedding the trousers as lazily as he removed his shirt.
"Want me to do yours?" He asked, not wondering if you'd rather handle the task, but if you were ready for the next step to be initiated at all. You told him you were ready, looking right in the guy's hooded deep brown eyes.
Jacob gently pushed you against the stack of pillows at the head of your bed. For one small moment, you paused to look at each other and smile. And then your friend shifted and reached for the button of your trousers. You watched as he hooked a couple fingers in the hem to peel the fabric away from your body, his eyes drinking in every newly exposed inch of you. You helped kicked away the pants, as Jacob reached to pull you back into his lap. In one swift move, you pushed him back into the pillows. You relished having the boy pinned below you, as you closed in for another kiss.
His hands traced across the expanses of your skin, his warm form settled beneath yours in the very best ways. You began to let your fingers trace patterns across his chest, feeling the hammer of his heart. Now both clad in nothing but underwear, the thin fabric allowed for you to feel more exactly of how worked up you'd gotten the boy.
You weren't nervous now to roll your hips against his. Or even if you might've been, they seemed to move on their own accord, your body seeking to satisfy its growing desires. Your rocking against the man's lap grew quietly more confident, and in the matter of a couple grinds you had Jacob whimpering against your lips.
Jacob gently pushed you from his lap, moving to hover over you in turn. "Okay?" He asked more succinctly but paused and watched for your confirmation just as patiently as every time before. And right as you began to nod, Jacob pressed his clothed hips against yours, encouraging your legs to open a little wider to make space for him. He kept his eyes sharply focused on yours, as he kept grinding, palming at your breast all the while. You were overcome, the coil in your belly tightening, and you hadn't even gotten to the good part.
His hand that had been working at your breast traveled downward, stalling near the hem of your underwear. Just as Jacob opened his mouth to ask if his next move was allowed, you were quicker. You grabbed his forearm and gently pushed his hand past the fabric of your undergarment, immediately glad for it.
His fingers found their way gently to your heat, giving subtle barely there caresses to the part of you that was most sensitive. Your toes curled and your heart stalled as he touched you with such tender intention. The pair of you managed to settle side by side, and without discussion, you reached to move Jacobs fingers to the spot he'd been nearly close to finding. The feeling that followed sent sparks through your nervous system, and your own hand shot out toward Jacob's underwear in response. You didn't ask, you simply slid your digits up and down the clothed length of your friend's crotch, relishing the shuttered breaths he released as you did so. The pair of you kept this up for a short moment, kissing when you weren't stealing each others breath away.
"Can we get to the part where you fuck me?" You sighed, worried that if you didn't do so soon, in the midst of your highest confidence, you'd lose the nerve. Jacob let out a quiet chuckle as he nodded, moving to shed the last of both of your clothes. Gentle as ever, he took as much time with this process as ever, making you more at ease and anxious for the next step all the same.
"Are you sure?" Jacob worried, settling between your legs. You kept one hand against his face and the other set of your fingers grasping his shoulder. You nodded quickly between shaky breaths, your nerves heightening slightly at the realization this was happening. But then Jacob shook his head. "I'm not doing anything until you relax, doll."
You were fully aware of your uneven breathing and the tensing of your body, due to the anxiousness that threatened to swallow you whole. You wanted this, you really did. But that didn't stop your nervous system from going a bit haywire during such an unprecedented situation.
"Relax." Jacob repeated. He petted your hair back and smoothed a hand across your shoulder, attempting to ease the tension you held there. You tried your best to settle a bit more comfortably against the sheets as the guy spoke up again. "Take like four deep breaths, and relax." Jacob guided you through his desired number of focused inhales, taking them in just as deeply himself. You closed your eyes during the last couple and felt yourself truly a little more at ease by way of Jacob's help and kind focus. You watched the guy breath out same as you, the fourth time, and after a beat he gave you a subtle nod.
"Good, that's better. Now, are you super sure?" He prompted, letting his hands hold you firmly against him, not daring to move until you gave your full, more at ease, confirmation. When you said yes with a smile, Jacob smiled too, and proceeded to line his hips up with yours.
As he pressed into you slow and steady, he cooed in your ear. Mumbling pet names and sweet encouragements about how good you'd already made him feel. Between his saccharine words and the pressure between your legs, you were done for.
Your breathing quickened all too soon but wasn't as shaky and uneven as before. Your skin burned with want. Your legs spread far as they could. He placed a loving hand against your temple, and you gripped his wrist as he began to move his hips in a sinfully slow manner.
The press of his lips to your throat was made more intimate by the grazing of his teeth there too. The speed at which he rocked into you began to increase, your heart rate following suit. everything felt better than you could've even fathomed. You were glad you did this with someone you knew and trusted. Someone whose hands were familiar to at least some parts of your own body and whose voice was welcomed in your ear. So glad you were doing this with someone you'd let do it all over again. So glad you're doing this with Jacob.
"You're doing so good, so good, nothing to be nervous about." The last word of his sentence was abruptly cut off by a growl the man couldn't seem to hold back.
Jacob was relentless now, pulling your hips against his as he rocked so hard against you, the bed frame kept hitting the wall. You couldn't imagine feeling much better than this, but then he asked if you were close to reaching your breaking point. You realized you'd never known before, and you really weren't sure now. "I don't know." You admitted with a twinge of worry. "It feels so good, Jacob, but I-I don't know." A sigh escaped your lips as he hit a certain spot within you. He grumbled encouragement in your ear, saying it was okay that you didn't know, and kept up his efforts.
"But I can't hold back much longer, I'm sorry." Jacob cried, his movements becoming sloppy, still heavenly though. It was your turn to encourage him, and let him know it was okay to come undone. Jacob was a goner soon after your brief pep talk, pulling himself from you as his seed spilled across your stomach. As Jacob caught his breath, he promised to go hunting for a towel to clean you up as you propped yourself on your elbows.
"Is it disappointing that I didn't come?" You worried, sitting up a little, catching your own breath. Jacob smirked, and petted back your hair, settling a little closer to you.
"I'm just glad you didn't fake it. Sometimes it just takes practice to know how to make it happen... to find out what you like, ya know?"
"Yeah, I s'pose." You contemplated, a bit cross that it hadn't happened, because it was half the reason you were eager to get this first time sorted out, so you could know how to handle yourself. Jacob had spotted a towel a few steps from your bedside, and was quick to retrieve it. And as he sweetly took to cleaning up the mess he'd made about you, he spoke up.
"You know, I never said our little educational experiment was over..." Jacob was smug, but turned up a brow to nod seriously your way and in a moment that made your cheeks flush even still after everything that had just occurred.
"Would... would you?"
Jacob said nothing. He simply dove back in to kiss you again, with more passion than ever, you thought. The man pressed you to lean against the pillows once again, as his fingers danced lower and lower down your abdomen.
"You seemed to like when I did this." Jacob cooed, letting his fingers ghost over your heat for the second time that evening, grazing a certain spot you'd once helped him find. You sucked in a breath at the feeling, giving Jacob the green light to proceed with more vigor. He pressed his fingers against you with more certainty, swirling more meaningful circles in that one spot. Jacob watched as you bit your lips together, struggling to keep an undignified moan from bursting from your chest.
"Think I must be doing something right." You friend boasted, keeping up the motions he'd settled into perfectly making. All the while, he moved to kiss you. His mouth, you were certain, must've left marks peppered across you skin as his lips moved from your neck to your throat, to your breasts and down further and further and further.
Once his lips ghosted across your core, you knew you were done for. The man let his tongue replace his fingers, as his digits moved to slide inside of you. His hair tickled your thighs, and every sensation added up together was nearly too much to process.
You thought Jacob's hands were magical, his lips and tongue were mind blowing. His warm breath, his teeth grazing, it was all more intense than you'd though it could've been. Your back arched, your hips rolled, and Jacob shouldered closer, putting as much vigor into this process as he could manage. Now, you suddenly seemed to understand the answer to his previous statement. You were close, now. You had to be. Your every sense buzzed and all you felt was increasing ecstasy.
You couldn't begin to hold back your cries of pleasure now, as Jacob worked you into a frenzy. He kept up his efforts until your legs shook, and only when you nudged his head gently away from it's latch onto your lower half, did he cease.
"I would ask if you enjoyed that but I think I know the answer." Jacob grinned, crawling to lay at your side. You laid in a daze, wondering how someone could've gotten that reaction from you. Of course it was Jacob who had.
You glanced at him from the corner of your eye, and for no good reason at all, you both burst into a fit of laughter. Exhausted giggles, that died down when a cough alerted you to how dry your throat had become from all the harsh breathing you'd done.
Jacob insisted on taking care of you, finding water for the pair of you to drink and escorting you to the shower. You pulled him in with you, and talked about silly things as you washed up, comfortable as before in your friendship.
"Hey, thank you. I really was so scared to go through all that. But you made it easy. You made it fun." You confessed, as Jacob wrapped a towel around your frame. He ran his hands up and down your arms, warming you from the chill of the room.
"Thank you for trusting me. You'll never know how much of an honour it was, really." Jacob nodded sincerely, before pulling you into an embrace. He went home shortly afterward, promising to see you soon, and joking that he'd more than happily help you practice again, anytime. You laughed along with him, and secretly hopped he wasn't joking.
///
After he left, sleeping with Jacob constantly played back in your mind. The phantom feeling of his body lingered about your skin. You thought of little else than your dear friend, as you moved through the motions of the next day. So, to remedy your fever for the lad, you called him and asked about meeting up for dinner. He responded quickly insisting he'd love to, and that he would swing by your place a little later on. Time dragged on as you counted the minutes until he arrived.
When the knock came at your door, you opened it with perhaps too much excitement. Neither of you said anything, and a brief moment of silence filled the space between you.
"It's still a little early for dinner." You schemed. Jacob quirked a brow, stepping in as you stepped back to make room for him. He shut the door behind himself, as you crossed your fingers behind your back... "Maybe... to kill time, we could do what we did the other night?" You hoped, casting a hopeful glare up to the man before you. And before you even finished your sentence, he reached out to pull you closer, crashing his lips against yours once you'd finished talking.
It wasn't long until he had you lifted from the ground in his arms, your legs wrapped around his torso as he moved to throw you on the sofa.
"You do have a lot still to learn." Jacob smirked, untying the joggers that hugged your hips.
"But we are eating later." You demanded, craving a certain local restaurant.
"Well, I'm not waiting till later." Jacob growled, smiling as he lowered himself between your legs right away. The night spiraled into a mess of moans that were familiar to you now. When the pair of you were spent, you cleaned up and went to dinner, and then parted your separate ways.
After that night, there were four days until you were set to move away. And Jacob showed up at your door every evening with a different excuse each time.
He'd wanted to see the newest horror film in the local theater. You left halfway through to fuck in your car. Jacob mentioned that practice made perfect, and he was more than happy to help you hone this craft. You'd wanted to throw a party with all your friends before summer sent you each different way's. A whole soiree was planned in which you and Jacob skipped out early on; because the broom closet you'd snuck into wasn't giving either of you enough space to work with, and you'd both concluded this may be the last chance you got to really participate in your new found hobby.
But the next day, he found his way over all the while. And neither of you had to ask. It was only a matter of time before he had you pinned against the bathroom counter, and you'd never been happier. Just as you began reaching your climax, Jacob spoke up between sighs, "I don't want you to leave."
"Then come with me."
"What?"
"Come with me." You manage to get out the words before losing all composure. He followed close behind. But you both knew finding release together wasn't what you meant when you asked him to come along.
As you both caught your breath, Jacob brushed your hair back, and let his eyes consider all of your features. As he took too long to respond, you decided to draw a bath, and invited him to settle among the bubbles with you, where you brought up your question one more time.
"We've had lot's of practice, you know." You settled across from the man you'd come to know better than you ever expected. "Maybe we can go pro. Make it official?" You watched Jacob watch you, as you spoke.
"Was this your plan the whole time? You're twisted way of getting me to fall for you?"
"No, I genuinely just wanted your help that one night. Then it turned into many many nights. And now I don't want to ever have to worry about practicing with anyone but you."
And so after a few more rounds of questions of answers, it was decided. Jacob would follow you to a new town to live a new life. But with your oldest friend at your side and under shared sheets, you weren't so nervous about all the new things you would get to encounter, together.
───※ ·❆· ※───
594 notes · View notes
hispg · 8 months
Text
I will make you forget
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Pairings: Roommate! Leon x Fem! Reader
Wc: 2.3k
Summary: After a guy you were dating suddenly ends things with you, you feel bad and blame yourself for the situation. But your roommate Leon promises to make you forget what happened.
Warnings: Porn without plot, smut, unprotected sex, p in v, creampie, oral (f receiving), cowgirl, jealousy, praise, dirty talking, overstimulation, pet names.
An: I'm thinking a bit too much about roommate Leon, so there is.
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Your day was a mess. Things hadn't worked out at college, apart from the fact that the guy you were meeting just broke things off with you. Over the phone.
You had already noticed his strange behavior over the last few days, but you didn't think things would escalate like this. You thought it would work out this time, and you ended up having a lot of feelings for him.
The first thing you thought of was going back to your apartment, which you shared with a man called Leon, who, by the way, was a great roommate.
And since he wasn't home these days, you could be more free to cry without having to give too many explanations.
You did just that. You stormed into the apartment, ran to your room, and lay down on your bed, curling up like a ball and sobbing your heart out. It was pathetic the way you were still wearing the clothes you'd worn to meet the guy, the idiotic way that this was hurting you in such a manner.
Since you were crying so much, you didn't even notice when Leon came home, steps quiet and silent as always. He thought you weren't home, but that changed as soon as he heard the whimpering coming from your room.
Through the crack in the door, he saw you curled up in the bed, crying a lot. This worried him, and he instinctively went over to your bed, sat down next to you, and put a gentle hand on your back.
"What's wrong?" he whispered, looking at you with a gentle, worried gaze.
You turned to him, your eyes red and swollen, and tears streaming down your face.
"N-nothing..." You said in a sob, hiding your face in the sheets.
He obviously didn't buy your conversation, but he had an answer as soon as he saw a notification on your cell phone, it was from a boy. From the message, he immediately guessed that things hadn't worked out for you, he saw the way you'd been excited over the last few weeks.
He couldn't deny the feeling of jealousy he felt when you talked about the other boy, wishing you were excited about him. But he never had the courage to confess anything to you.
He kept comforting you until you felt better, saying sweet words and caressing you, and this brought you a strange sense of peace.
"You shouldn't cry about these things." He says, his palm caressing your cheek.
You let out a sniffle, sitting up in bed and looking at him. You tried to force a smile, but it didn't work.
He laughed quietly, then said, "Can I do something to make you forget that?"
You looked at him puzzled, then nodded.
He brought his face close to yours, his hand now lifting your chin, his lips met yours, and he gave you a soft, sweet kiss.
"You just need a little love," he murmurs during the kiss, his other hand holding your waist.
You kiss him back, enjoying the feel of his soft lips. He pulls you against him, making you feel the firmness of his body on yours.
It wasn't long before he was gently laying you down on the bed, on top of you.
His hands were now sliding down your body, squeezing and massaging the tense points, his lips not leaving yours for a second.
Once he left your lips, his eyes analyzed you from head to toe, seeing you with your lips parted, lying on the bed, and looking at him with puppy eyes.
"Such a beautiful little thing." He purrs, giving your thigh a little stroke.
You gasped, arching your body a little towards him, your mind a mess, all you could feel was how hot your body was getting. That's because he hadn't done anything yet, just a few kisses, and you could already feel your panties starting to get wet. Imagine when he actually did something?
Suddenly, his hands moved under your thighs, making you spread your legs for him, the grin he gave as soon as he saw that... It was enough to elicit a low whimper from you.
"What a pretty little princess, you don't know how much I've fantasized about it." An almost inaudible whisper, not least because his focus wasn't on you hearing him.
Why was that? Well, his mouth was very busy licking and sucking on your inner thighs, leaving slight marks here and there. His big, warm hands gripping your ass firmly, while he made you moan softly with just those kisses.
"That's so good..." You hum, running your fingers through his hair, and this apparently turned him on even more.
He nodded and was bold enough to run his tongue down your panties, teasing you over the fabric. The bastard went right for your clit, only to draw a sweet moan from your lips.
Your hips bucked involuntarily, urgently needing more contact. Seeing this, he gave a slight grunt, pulling your panties down, licking his lips as soon as he saw your fluids dripping down delicately.
"Fucking pretty." He said, brushing his fingers over your entrance, moving them up and down.
You began to grind against his fingers, begging him with your eyes to do something. Oh, and he certainly did.
He put two fingers in at once, moaning at the way he managed to slide in so easily. You were so wet, and so tight for him.
His fingers curved around you, finding your sweet spots, and with his other free hand he pulled your shirt up along with your bra. He began to fondle your breasts, pinching the nipples between his fingers until they were hard.
By then you were letting his name escape your lips more and more, squirming under him.
"Fucking beautiful," he purrs, placing his lips on your nipple, swirling his tongue around it, "Fucking hot."
"Mhmhm, feels so good..." You moaned, pushing his head against your breast even harder, his fingers moving in and out, curving around and hitting your favorite spots again and again.
The way his voice vibrated on your skin with each moan, you could clearly see him rutting against your thigh. He wanted so much to make you his, to put his cock deep inside you, to fuck you like there was no tomorrow.
But he needed to taste you first, he needed to make you come at least twice. He wanted to make your body feel numb from how good he was going to make you feel.
"I'm close..." You moan, arching your body and clutching the covers in an effort to hold on anywhere.
His smile grew, he stopped sucking your breast, and to your surprise he began to leave a trail of kisses, starting at your chest and going down, belly, navel, crotch, thighs, and finally where you wanted it most, right at your core.
Another cry came from your lips, your eyes rolling back in your head as you felt his tongue lapping at your clit. His fingers are still moving quickly, in and out.
"Come on, cum for me, I want to taste you." He murmured against your abused hole, redoubling his efforts. He was more than willing to make you come.
You were a whimpering mess, writhing and calling his name. At this point, all the sounds in the room were yours, the impure moans and phrases you never imagined would come out of your mouth.
What you needed was a little push, and he did it, taking his fingers out of you and holding your ass with both hands, sinking his face into your pussy.
"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." You moaned, pushing his head even further, your thighs pressed against his face.
Once he started fucking you with his tongue, it was over. Your body arched, your eyes went to the back of your head and you whimpered so loudly. As if you'd been to heaven and hell all at once.
Your liquids being sucked by him, sparing no drop. He needed to taste you, a taste he fantasized about too much. He never broke eye contact, you could see him staring at you as he stuck out his tongue and licked your center.
It was so erotic, you were getting all wet once again. Feeling your body heat up even more in the aftermath of orgasm.
Without warning, he let your legs fall onto the bed, and he pulled you into a tongue kiss, making you taste yourself on his lips. You moaned together, seeing how impure the whole situation was. The next thing you heard was his belt, soon followed by the sound of a zipper opening.
As if it were a magic trick, he removed his own clothes, leaving him naked. He helps you remove the few pieces left on your body, and just when you thought he was going to mount you and get on top, he doesn't.
On the contrary, he sits on the bed and spreads his legs, with a naughty smile on his face.
"Give me a ride, pretty girl." He purrs, his erection resting on his stomach.
You bite your lip, looking at his full body, and of course you knew he was hot. But seeing him live was something else.
The defined muscles, the six-pack he had, the pale skin that looked so.. Markable. Your head was soon invaded by these thoughts.
And without you even realizing it, your lips were on his chest, leaving light wet kisses, and one of your hands touched his erection, giving it a light stroke.
"Keep going..." He whispered, ruffling your hair and leaning further back on the bed, giving you room to do whatever you wanted.
You licked, nibbled, rubbed and literally feasted on his chest. It was well worth it, as you heard his soft moans from time to time. As well as the generous layer of pre-cum that dripped onto your fingers.
Seeing this, he was quick to pull you by the hips and place you on his lap, your entrance just above his tip. Just a few centimeters away.
He was desperate, he needed to feel what it was like to fuck you, how well he was going to be able to stretch your walls.
His hips begin to buck upwards, threatening to enter you at once. His hands run up your back, each one stopping on your shoulders.
Your arms wrapped around his neck as he captured your lips in a hot, sensual kiss, drawing sweet sounds from you.
With a little force he pushed you down, putting his head inside, eliciting moans and whimpers from both parties.
He was at a point where he couldn't wait, so he thrust his hips upwards as he put you down, making sure he penetrated you all at once.
"Leon!" You moaned at the sudden action, your nails digging into his back.
A wicked grin was his response, and he began to move, while you also grinded against him, both of you moving in sync.
"All you needed was someone to fuck you, didn't you? Someone to claim your pussy?" He purred sensually, rocking into you a little harder.
You nodded, you were being so dumbed down by that cock, going in and out, going so deep and stretching you so well. You couldn't think straight.
Your response was a whimper, your lips parted and you bounced on his cock, as if for the last time.
You could still feel your cunt burning and sensitive from the last orgasm, but who cared? It made things even more exciting somehow.
His hands went down to your ass, separating them and holding them tightly, slamming his cock into you even harder, and you followed the movements.
"Fucking tight, so perfect for me." He growled, leaving a hickey on your neck.
"Mhmhm..." You babble, holding on tightly to his shoulders. You could feel your walls clenching around him, just as he was almost there, too.
Once again his lips find your breast, taking it once more. His tongue playing shamelessly on your nipple.
You were only mumbling things here and there at this point, and you can bet that you sounded just as dumb. Not that you cared much.
"Go on, baby. Come for me, I want to feel it one more time." Fuck, the way he looked at you when he whispered to you.
Your lips open to let out a little squeak, you were so close to the edge.
You obeyed, as if your body was just waiting for this command to finish, you just managed to mutter, "I'm going to come!" Which came out more in the form of a moan than anything else.
And there you went, wetting his cock. The sensation was so overwhelming that you thought you'd pass out. As if your body was numb after yet another orgasm.
He grunted, fucking you with even more fervor, "Fuck, squeeze me harder like that."
That was enough to drive him crazy, with a deep thrust followed by a loud groan he came, filling you with his cum. White cream oozed out of you, his fluids mixing with yours and making a mess.
He kissed you, in a way to calm your nerves, a hot, sloppy tongue kiss, with lots of moans and grunts in between.
"Thank you." You whispered, a shy smile appearing on your lips.
He chuckled, kissing you on the cheek, "You're welcome."
After a few kisses, he rolled you over in bed, snuggling into you and ruffling your hair as you closed your eyes.
"There's a Halloween party in town tomorrow, do you want to go with me?" Leon wasn't much of a party guy, but if it meant spending more time with you, he didn't mind.
Your face lit up, and you hugged him, "Sure, I'd love to go with you."
He sighed contentedly, kissing your forehead, "Well, is going to be a nice day."
You nodded, snuggling with him. It was more than enough to have a date with him. A while later, you were cuddled up, sleeping peacefully.
Who would have thought that on a day like today you'd find this kind of comfort? Things had definitely taken a different turn.
And you loved it, and so did he.
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ericshoney · 10 days
Text
Protective ~ Sturniolo triplets
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You had thought that your Saturday was going to be a dull one. Not having any plans, you thought to just chill, game and probably watch movies all day. That was until Matt had messaged you asking if you wanted to spend the day with him, Chris and Nick. You agreed and said you'd head to their place soon.
As it was quite hot out, you slipped on a pair of light blue denim shorts, along with a white crop top and your trainers. You were happy with your outfit as you knew it wasn't only just simple and stylish, but would keep you cool too.
You then walked to the triplets place, which was luckily around the corner from your apartment. When you arrived, you walked in as the door was already unlocked waiting your arrival.
"Hey guys!" You greeted as you saw the trio sat on the sofa waiting for you, their heads buried in their phones.
"Hey, looking good!" Chris responded first.
"Thank you." You replied with a smile.
"Where are we going?" You then asked, as the brothers pulled away from their phones.
"We thought about the mall." Matt said, making you nod.
"Alright let's go!" Nick exclaimed.
You laughed at his sudden excitement as you headed to the car. You got in the back with Nick, as he started showing you some random TikToks as Matt drove and Chris played some music.
When you all arrived, you walked in seeing it wasn't too busy. You walked in the middle of Matt and Nick, Chris on Matt's left.
"Where to first?" Nick questioned.
"There!" You exclaimed, pointing to a store that had a sale on.
You headed off a bit before the guys, starting to look around at everything. Your eyes landed on some cool shirts that were half price.
"Hey beautiful~"
You looked over and saw a random guy standing next to you. You looked around and saw it was only you and him.
"Uh hey." You mumbled.
"That's a cool shirt, would look good on you." He said.
You remained silent, hoping if you ignored him, he'd leave, but he wasn't having it.
"How about I get your number, I'll buy you that shirt and take you on a date." He carried on.
"Who?" Nick called, suddenly appearing, along with Chris and Matt.
"Who...what?" The stranger questioned.
"Who the fuck are you." Nick replied.
"Just asking a pretty girl out, none of your business." He responded.
"She's not interested." Matt said, as Chris wrapped his arm around your shoulder, knowing you were uncomfortable.
"So fuck off." Nick said, waving his hands to send the stranger away.
The guy scoffed and walked off, as you sighed in relief.
"What a weirdo." Matt mumbled.
"You okay?" Chris asked softly.
"Yeah, thanks for showing up suddenly." You answered, giving the three a smile.
"Of course." Nick said, as Matt and Chris nodded.
You four then looked around all getting some stuff you liked, before heading to grab some food. As you headed to the food court, you noticed it was really busy. The guys noticed how uncomfortable you suddenly felt with so many people around, as they shared a look, all suddenly thinking the same thing.
"Drive thru." They said at the same time.
You all then headed back to the car, Chris' arm still wrapped around your shoulder in comfort as Nick and Matt walked in front of you.
After arriving back at the car, the four of you settled on McDonalds, Matt driving there and going through the drive thru as Nick ordered for all of you.
"You wanna head back to our place?" Matt suggested, looking back at you.
"Yeah, I don't want to deal with anymore strangers." You said with a small giggle.
"That I can agree on." Matt replied.
"That guy was a total creep though." Chris said.
"Totally. His approach was all wrong." Nick agreed.
"Maybe next time, wear jeans." Matt said jokingly.
"Whatever." You grumbled, making the boys laugh.
"But in all seriousness, we're here to save you from the creeps, the heartbreaks and the fashion disasters." Nick said.
"Your all just protective, but I love you all for it." You responded.
The three smiled as you headed on home, happy you had them by your side.
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hyperfixatedbastard · 3 months
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do you write hypnosis stuff?? it's not specifically against the rules but idk it's kind of an iffy era for a lot of writers-
if it's okay with you, could you write some Vox x Singer!Reader who he uses his mind control on to sell their soul to him so they remain under the VoxTek label? (im sure remaining with him is an ulterior motive of his as well lol)
thanks :]
I can absolutely do that! I’m a little iffy about NSFW hypnosis, but I can do a SFW oneshot :)
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siren songs
Obsessed!Vox x Singer!GN!Reader
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Word Count: 1.4k
WARNINGS: Yandere-ish behavior, hypnosis, manipulation, toxic behavior, all that good stuff
A/N: I told y'all I'd be back with some toxic Vox!! I wasn't entirely sure how to end this one, but I've spent enough time rewriting it to stop caring. This one is only romantic in theory - nothing actually romantic happens between Vox and Reader, it's more mutual pining than anything else This is also my first time writing obsessive behavior, so I hope I did it well!
Dividers
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You’ve been working with the Vees for years now. You were originally recruited by Velvette, who’s like a bloodhound for new talent. She saw some popular videos of your singing online, and she made you famous.
But you don’t work with her that much, oddly enough. Over time, you gradually started to see her less and less. Vox was the one to take her place. By the time you noticed, there wasn’t much you could do about it—you’re certainly not an equal to the Vees, so there wasn’t much you could do. Sure, you could’ve quit then and there, as you’d never signed a soul-binding contract, but you really liked your job. You were getting to do what you loved for a living! Who wouldn’t want that?
Well, you. You don’t want that anymore. You’re getting burnt out. You feel like you’re out of creativity for writing songs, and singing no longer has the same appeal it used to. It feels like a chore. Getting on stage doesn’t get you excited—it just fills you with dread.
Then you saw the videos of the annual clown pageant down in the Greed Ring. How Fizzarolli, Mammon’s favorite little jester, just…quit. Just like that. 
Can you do that?
You don’t have backup like Fizzarolli did. There’s no Prince of Hell to protect you if the Vees lash out in response to your resignation. But the Vees aren’t Mammon. They’re powerful Overlords, sure, but they wouldn’t kill off an easy cash grab like you. And they don’t have any leverage to use against you—you’re a fucking superstar, you learned to stop keeping secrets a long time ago.
Yeah, you can totally do this!
You spend the next week making a plan. You currently live in V Tower, so finding another living arrangement is a priority. Luckily, your standards are just as low as before you got famous, so snatching up an apartment doesn’t take long. You’ve been building up savings for some time now, just little bits here and there that wouldn’t look suspicious among your bank withdrawls, so you have enough money to last you a while. You’ve made a go-bag, but you’re not too worried about bringing anything with you, as you have enough cash to just buy new shit. By the time the end of the week comes around, you’ve got your escape plan ready to go. All that’s left is to actually quit.
You decide that directly speaking to Vox is your best option. Velvette and you don’t have the same rapport that you used to, and Valentino is just… no. During your time working with Vox, you like to think there’s some sort of friendship there. The two of you chat amicably, and he always makes sure you’re okay when it comes to creepy fans and the like. You feel like there could be something more than just friendship, but you don’t plan on staying long enough to find out. As much as you like Vox, you’re not willing to spend the rest of your afterlife hating every second of your job just for him.
You stand outside Vox’s lair, mentally preparing yourself for this conversation. You take a deep breath, and right before you can knock on the door, it opens.
Okay, here goes.
⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
You aren’t as sneaky as you seem to think you are.
A normal boss wouldn’t have noticed the small transactions in your bank account, or the little trips you’ve been taking to go look at apartments. But Vox isn’t a ‘normal boss’ by any means. And he noticed.
From the moment Vox set eyes on you, he knew he wanted you. You’re beautiful, and fuck, your voice—he just can’t get you out of his damn head, no matter how hard he tries. And he really fucking tried. But he couldn’t avoid you, thanks to VoxTek being such an integral part of your performances. And you’re like a damn siren with that voice of yours, even though he’s supposed to be the hypnotizing one here. Eventually, he just gave in and accepted that he was more than a little obsessed with you. That’s why he started drawing you closer to him, pushing away Velvette and taking control of your brand. He doesn’t like sharing.
Obsession isn’t a particularly new feeling for Vox. He certainly has… tendencies. But this isn’t like whatever the fuck he’s got going on with that deer-headed, old-timey bastard Alastor. It’s not a lust thing, either. You’re certainly attractive, and Vox most definitely would sleep with you, but that’s not the main factor at play here. This is a deeper obsession than any of that bullshit.
Vox knows that he doesn’t own your soul. He’s well aware that he can’t truly stop you from quitting. Even if he managed to trap you inside V Tower, he can’t force you to keep up the performances. If he had you under a proper soul-binding contract, though…
He would own you.
Now, he’s not Valentino. He doesn’t plan to take that kind of advantage over you. He doesn’t want to change a damn thing. He just wants you to stay.
And he will make you stay.
He knows when you approach his office, and he opens the doors with the touch of a button on his desk. He plasters that casually perfect smile on his screen and turns to face you as you enter. The doors shut behind you.
“I wasn’t expecting to see you today, my dear,” he lies easily, the charismatic mask fitting into place like it was never absent in the first place. “How can I help you?”
You hesitate, your anxiety starting to get to you. But you’re determined to do this. You clear your throat and step forward. “I’m resigning.”
Vox’s smile doesn’t falter, nor does his screen glitch. His demeanor is…unnerving, to say the least. You’ve known him to be temperamental, emotional. You expected some kind of reaction. But he’s just smirking at you like he always does.
“I don’t suppose there’s anything I can do to change your mind,” he replies smoothly, tilting his head to the side just slightly.
“No,” you confirm, trying to sound confident in your answer. You’re not sure if you succeed. “I’ve already made my decision.”
Vox sighs, though he doesn’t sound very defeated. His smirk hasn’t gone away, either. “Well, then. It’s been a pleasure working with you, darling.”
He holds his hand out for you to shake. The gesture immediately worries you, as it’s the well-known sign of a deal. But you reassure yourself that there’s no deal being made here. Hell may be chaotic, but there’s rules when it comes to these kinds of things. Neither of you have offered anything, therefore there’s no harm in shaking his hand. It’s just a respectful gesture of a boss wishing their employee farewell. It all feels too easy, but you’re too relieved to think too hard about it.
You go to take his hand, but as you lift your head up to meet his gaze, everything goes fuzzy.
Vox grabs you by your wrist before you can shake his hand. He’s not rough with you. He’s careful of his claws, ensuring they don’t put too much pressure on your skin. Not that you’d notice, either way—your mind is far gone at this point, thanks to those spirals in his eye.
“In exchange for your soul, you’ll remain under the VoxTek label and continue working for me. Your work will remain the same as before. You’ll forget about leaving. You will want to stay here. You will want to stay here with me.”
A golden scroll appears out of thin air, and it floats in front of you as it unfurls. “Sign it.”
Your body moves on its own. You sign your name on the line at the bottom of the page.
Vox releases your wrist, and takes your hand in his own as his eye reverts back to its normal state. When you come to just moments later, he’s shaking your hand with calm professionality.
“I’m glad we got that sorted out,” Vox remarks smoothly, his smirk looking almost proud now. “I look forward to your next performance, my dear.”
You blink a few times as you become more lucid and aware. “Uh, yeah. Can’t wait!”
You smile, and Vox releases your hand, seemingly satisfied with your answer. You don’t remember what exactly you came in here for, but you’re happy with the outcome.  “Perfect.”
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lab1rynth · 1 year
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hii! :D
I was wondering if requests were open and if they were, if I could request a sub sugar daddy type yandere? So basically, a yandere who just buys everything for you and does anything to get your attention? But he isn't a daddy, just pure sub. you don't have to do this and can change anything u want,, :)
Also, could I be an anon, and if yes can I be 🎀 anon please? tyy <3
Welcome New anon! Hope you dont mind, I also made him a dilf!!
Yan!DILF/Sugar Daddy
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Yan!Dilf who's kids you meet on the the day you first moved in next door, they were playing with a garden hose outside when they noticed you dropping off boxing and went to see you. The two drenched kids welcoming you to the neighborhood and inviting you for dinner, which you accepted gleefully, much better than the bowl of ramen you were planning on snacking on.
Yan!Dilf who's quite surprised when his kids bring in a total stranger, though welcoming you with kindness once his kids explained who you are. He made sure to calmly tell them how dangerous it is to welcome strangers into the house without his permission, but let it slide this time.
Yan!Dilf who decides to do a barbeque so you all can just relax and eat outside, his kids just splashing around with the hose and accidentally getting his shirt soaked showing off his torso quite a bit. He wasn't ripped and he did have a little bit of chub to him, like a dad bod. You, of course, caught yourself staring and directed your attention back to laughing at the kids.
Yan!Dilf who continues to invite you to dinner every night for the next few months, having you learn more and more about him. He's a single father, his exe wife died during child birth after giving birth to the twins 7 years ago. He hasn't really tried dating since then, he's been so busy with work and his kids that he never actually had time to give it a thought.
Yan!Dilf who you start spending more time with before dinner, helping around the house, watching the kids when he needs to do something. You fill a whole in his heart that has been left empty for a long while. He finds himself falling in love with you, wanting to just be there right beside you for the rest of his life.
Yan!Dilf who starts taking you out to eat when the kids are at school, buying you clothes, food and necessities even if you refuse. He just wants to spoil you. His face turns bright red every time he sees you wearing the clothes he bought for you, feeling so proud anytime you eat food he makes for you.
Yan!Dilfs kids who one day propose a sleep over, of course you say yes to it! You head over to the house and help the twins make a little fort, their father joining in around the end to help his kids fix up the fort, as it kept falling apart. After making a little snack platter and turning on a movie on his laptop, he got dressed in a grey short sleeved shirt and boxers, showing off his body quite a lot, hoping you'd notice.
Yan!Dilf who ends up cuddling you with one arm and his kids with the other as you sleep under the tent, though all he can do is stare at you, pressing a kiss on your head and holding you close, admiring your beautiful face.
Yan!Dilf who confesses his love to you the next day after making breakfast and dropping the kids off, he's on his knee's cupping your hands in his own and begging you to be with him, telling you how much he loves you and how he dreams of wedding you some day, opening up his heart and spilling his emotions for you.
Yan!Dilf who, for all this time, has been collecting photos of you on his phone, looking at them before bed every night after you go home. He dreams about your future as he sleeps, and he wants more kids with you. If you're able to give birth, he's nervous and scared that the same thing will happen to you that happened to his wife, but he's willing to try if you take enough precautions. If you can't, he's so excited to be able to adopt some in the future with you!
Yan!Dilf who will do anything for you, right when you ask, no matter what. You dont like someone? They aren't going in a 100 mile radius of you ever again. Sex? Hell yeah, baby, lets strip. Want a massage? He'll learn all of the good techniques just for you.
Yan!Dilf who was never able to get you off his mind, or out of reach, without pouting. He cuddles against you and holds onto your hips and hands whenever he can. This man whimpers whenever you trace his finger along his skin or give him a smooch. He lets out small moans anytime you press kisses to his neck or massage his back, he's basically putty in your hands.
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