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#engineer mark x reader
amee-racle-ofmyown · 2 months
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the only You for Me
Captaineer drabble (Captain is reader) | Words: 381 | (fluff/sorta hurt-comfort?) | Read on AO3
From where he lies beside you, you feel a hand rest atop yours, calloused fingertips brushing your knuckles.
‘Can I ask you something?’
‘Mhm,’ you hum in assent, ‘ ‘course.’
‘Were there ever any of the other “me”s that you… liked more than, well, me…?’
‘What? No, Mark, of course not. Why would you–? No. You're my Mark. Hey,’ You take his face in both your hands, gently making him meet your eyes. ‘I didn't go halfway across the multiverse just to find any old Mark.’
He gives a small laugh and you press your lips to his forehead before returning your gaze to look directly into his.
‘I'm sure the other "me"s out there have their own "you"s that they cherish in their own ways, and some of them could be enemies, in a sense, or even strangers. But that's their business. I love you. This you. More than anything or anyone — and I mean anyone. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that for you to fully believe you deserve it, or truly understand how much I mean it, but I'll remind you forever if I have to.’
It's dark in the room and you can just about make out his eyes and other features, but you can feel the slight tingle of warmth on his cheeks, imagine the blush tinting his face.
‘Forever's a long time,’ he says, voice low and soft and undeniably adoring.
‘Yeah, well, I think we both know the meaning of “a long time” better than maybe anyone. And in all that time — all those lifetimes, all those universes, I would always choose you, no matter what.'
He buries his face in the crook of your neck, using your upper arm as a pillow. His arms wind around your torso, pulling you close. You wrap your free arm over his back, stroking his dark curls and winding them gently, comfortingly, between and around your fingers.
‘I love you,’ he whispers against you. ‘You’re my whole universe, my everything. You're the only you I want, too.’
You want to wrap him up in your heart, deep within the warmth of your chest. But since you can't, you settle for holding him tighter, every night, and you never let go.
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jacksepticeye-simp · 1 year
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Confident (Head Engineer Mark x Reader)
Warning: This gets a little spicy, please click off if uncomfortable!
Your day on the ship was like any other. It was your responsibility to perform maintenance checks in order to keep the crew and ship in good condition. You were used to this routine, even though it was extremely boring. 
Your head engineer, Mark, was the only one who made your job easier. 
While you wouldn't admit it to anyone, you did have a small crush on him. 
The details about him were absolutely flawless, from his raven black hair to his bubbly personality, and his eyes too... You could stare into those brown eyes of his for hours at a time, and then- Oh, speak of the devil, Mark messaged you! To find out what he needs, you open the message. 
Would it be possible for us to meet in our quarters, captain? "I'm going to show you something." His message seemed off-putting. Maybe something was wrong or you were just paranoid. Well, it's good to see what he wants. 
Not like he's planning to smother you with a pillow or anything like that. You placed your hand on the scanner in front of the doors as they opened swiftly. You walked into the room you shared with the head engineer only to find the lights dimmed. 
You raised an eyebrow and stepped forward. Suddenly as if responding to your movement, multiple lights on a pathway made from flower petals lit up. Standing at the very end of the path, was Mark holding a sign that read 'Will you join me on a date, Captain?' You gasped in disbelief as your eyes locked on Mark's. "Yes!" You cried excitedly as you hugged him. He stood there in shock for a moment before smiling and hugging you back. 
"Really?" He asked, wanting to make sure you meant it. You nodded eagerly and looked at him again. Your eyes hold nothing but love. A slight grin covered his face. "Hey, captain?" Your gaze stays fixed on his face. 
"Want me to show you how much I love you?" He asked, leaning down to whisper in your ear. His voice is deep and smooth like velvet, creating a noticeable blush on your cheeks. You nodded, left speechless by his sudden confidence surge. Mark gently pushed you against the wall as he kissed your neck and collarbone. You just stood there, a blushing mess while he rubbed your sides. 
"God, you're so perfect, captain." He murmurs while kissing your cheek. He leans ever so close to your face and puts his hands on your waist while you put yours on his shoulders. Both of you leaned closer until your lips met. You 2 shared a passionate kiss for a while before it intensified. Mark gripped your hips tightly as the kiss got rougher, and the 2 of you eventually parted for air. Mark stared at you, his eyes half-lidded. "So, do you like how confident I can be, captain~?" You nodded as his lips curved into a smirk.
 "Then why don't I show you how confident I can get~.." 
Made for @dontspilltheteaplease
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cheeryraccoon · 2 years
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Giving You a Hoodie
I hope you enjoy these! I'd also appreciate one-shot or imagine requests/ideas.
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Mark -
• Found it absolutely adorable.
• He gave you a big, soft, grey hoodie.
• He tried to make sure it smelt like him and not Chica.
• When he sees you wear it he smiles and hugs you.
• So wholesome. 🥺
Dark -
• He doesn't usually wear hoodies so he only has one, maybe two.
• It was half white and half black with an hourglass between them.
• Despite him not wearing it often, it smelt very strongly of him.
• When he sees you wear it he smiles a little and kisses your forehead.
Wilford -
• Wilford doesn't have many either, he may buy one just so he could give it to you.
• It was pink, obviously, with heart detailing on the sleeves.
• It smelt like cotton candy, which happens to be the cologne Wilford uses.
• When he sees you wear it he makes a little "Awww" sound and gives you a hug and kiss.
Yancy -
• He has only one hoodie that the warden gave to him.
• It was all plain white with a little dot of something on the shoulder, you didn't ask what it was.
• It smelt faintly of him and you thought it was nice.
• He gets all excited when he sees you wearing it and usually picks you up and spins you around.
Illinois -
• He has a few hoodies that he usually wears on cold nights during adventures.
• It was white but had some dirt and sand on it.
• It definitely smelt like him, which is really comforting for when he's away.
• When he comes home from a long adventure and sees you in it, he gets a little emotional as he hugs you.
Engineer Mark -
• Since he's usually in his uniform he doesn't have many hoodies.
• The one he gave you was black with little white stars and constellations all over it.
• It faintly smelt like him but, with how much he loves hugging you, it started getting stronger.
• When he sees you wear it he does a little happy dance and tackles you in a hug.
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riaswritingalore · 1 year
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Head Engineer Mark x Reader headcanons.
He’s very much a puppy and follows you around to the point that the rest of the crew knows that to find Mark they have to find you first or vice-versa.
Like every puppy he’s also affectionate and a lot, of course he’s the king of denying it because him? loving his captain? That’s unprofessional and no he totally doesn’t have feelings what is everyone talking about?
He’s definitely the type to give you compliments when you do a good job and try to help you every way he can, he also likes hugs but he’s not too big on the others finding that out, especially not Celci. Unfortunately for him everyone knows he absolutely loves you and has been teased about it.
 Mark is insecure, he doubts his own abilities a lot no matter how much he brags about them, it doesn’t help that some members of the crew constantly call him stupid or idiot and while he sure has his moments where you doubt him you know in the long run that he’s smart and trustworthy. Of course, Mark needs a confirmation outloud of a job well done constantly, so whenever you tell him that he becomes super happy and will never fail to say “thank you, captain!” excitedly. He may also hug you tightly if no one is around.
 He’s the biggest PDA giver ever. Hugs? Kisses? Ruffling your hair? Hand-holding? Yeah all those and more. Mark can never get enough of you and he’ll always make an excuse to be able to hold you. In public, at most he will hold your hand or pat your shoulder.
If he had to say which part of you he loves the most,it would most definitely be your eyes. To him they are the most important part of someone since they’re the windows to the soul and yadda yadda yadda. But really he will get lost looking at how beautiful they are, he’d say it’s like looking at space which is something he loves maybe as much as he loves you.
One of Mark’s favouite activities to do is looking at space through the not-so-safe-glass-window he put on the deck along with you. He might have a cup of coffee on hand and be lost in thoughts after a while or enjoy to have a deep conversation with you or just talk about random stuff, maybe some memories you two share, maybe how the crew is doing... he just loves to hear you and be surrounded by the two things he loves the most. Similarly you love to hear him go on and on on about how much he loves space, and could catch him singing too. You did once tell him he had a nice singing voice and he was a babbling mess after that.
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buc-eebarnes · 2 years
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confessions when one character thinks the other is sleeping prompt pls omgggg
cheezy homie i always see u in my notifs and of COURSE i had to go all out on this !!!! sorry if it's late jfsdkljfsdkj jet lag got me conked out as soon as i landed but here it be! (unbeta'd tho 🥲 also trying out a different format 👀)
conversations with myself (about you)
pairing: head engineer mark x the captain
tags: confessions, sleeping, fluff and angst
rated G || 1469 words || read on ao3!
You huff out a sigh of relief. You'd been trying to chase Mark down all day, but his assistants kept telling you that he was in different parts of the base.
You should've known to check his office.
But there he was, slumped over the table with his head resting on top of folded arms. He must've tired himself out from all the projects he was micromanaging. You squint at the laptop to see what he was trying to work on.
It's a progress report. Multiple, actually. You stifle a sigh and look down at his sleeping figure. "Oh Mark, what are we gonna do with you?"
He doesn't stir at your words, which is a testament to how tired he is. You keep your voice low regardless.
There's a folded blanket on the couch, and it smells of him, a weird mixture of pine, oil, and the soap rations they brought from Earth. The couch must be where Mark crashes all the time, which pulls a frown on your lips.
You drape the blanket over him, securing the folds over his shoulders. He's gonna have a crick in his neck in the morning, but he'll thank you later, probably.
He looks so peaceful, sleeping. 
You observe him for a while. The constant furrow between his eyebrows is gone. He doesn't frown in his sleep, but his lips are parted, and you can hear the soft puffs of breath he releases. His hair is a bit of a mess, as if he'd run his hands through it multiple times throughout the day, and you find yourself wanting to do the same.
"When was the last time you knocked out like this?" you mutter. Your hand touches a strand that's fallen in front of his eyes before you could stop it.
Reflexes kick in and you jerk back, but he doesn't stir. The only thing that changes is that his brow furrows slightly, but his breaths remain constant, and you relax your arm. You hesitantly take off a glove, and, before you can chicken out, reach forward to tuck the strand of hair behind his ear.
That then motivates you to run your fingers through his thick black locks, and it's as soft as you imagined.
You chuckle lightly, amazed. "Whaddaya know."
You continue the motions, and eventually, the wrinkles between his brows disappear, his features peaceful once more.
You drink your fill admiring him. Wide nose. Strong jaw. Big ears that stick out. Beard's getting to the point where it would break regulation but you're the highest official on this base and what Earth doesn't know won't hurt them, anyway. You look down at the fold of his arms, contoured by muscles. His hands, his fingers, that are so deft, made to create and fix what's destroyed. Why does everyone put you on a pedestal about looks when Mark is literally right here, sleeping soundly and looking sculpted by the gods himself?
"Everyone's blind," you mumble. "I don't hold a candle to you."
The urge to hold his hand is incredibly strong. You could do it—thread your fingers with his until he wakes, blinking blearily up at you with trusting eyes and whispering "Captain?" in a sleepy voice, and you suddenly feel small and unworthy about every single time he followed your lead without question.
And you feel the weight of infinite universes on your shoulders. Not once did you initiate anything more than friendship with Mark with all of the chances you've been given. He was always the ballsier one, more impulsive, more outspoken. As someone who has taken the mantle of a captain of a spaceship, you are an incredibly timid person.
"I wish I had your courage. Your tenacity. Your ability to take charge." You let out a humorless chuckle, and your fingers twitch against his scalp. "Countless universes, countless timelines, and we end up right back here. If only I wasn't a coward. Maybe I could finally ask you out on that date, y’know? To not worry about being a captain. Just someone going on a date with the person they like."
He doesn't respond, but you think you could see his breathing stop for a moment. It's a minute thing, barely there, but it's enough for you to cease running your fingers through his hair.
Did he hear you? Panic wells up in your throat. Oh god. "Mark?"
He doesn't answer.
"Are you awake?" you whisper.
He still doesn't answer. His breathing resumes again, slower this time.
You bite your lip, waiting for ten very long seconds, and you slowly pull your hand away.
You swallow down whatever feelings bubbled up to the surface and leave his office, quiet as a mouse. You lean against the door and close your eyes for a moment, wondering if you'd fucked up a friendship you'd spent these past few months trying to mend.
The trek back to your quarters is long. You get ready for bed and end up staring at the ceiling for the rest of the night.
Was he awake? Did he hear everything? If he heard everything, then he definitely felt you with your hand in his hair.
Sleep takes you, eventually, but the sun is starting to rise when it does.
-
"—and that concludes today's meeting. Please consult Summers for the minutes if there's an item you have a question about. I'll see you all next week. Dismissed."
The morning following the whole did-Mark-hear-did-he-not-hear dilemma is strangely anticlimactic. Mark greets you with the same gusto he does every other time he sees you, which is, to say the least, minimal. He doesn't give an indication that he heard you last night, or that he was disgusted by any of your actions. Frankly, it seems like he's avoiding talking to you, which is already the norm for your relationship these past few months. You chalk it up to your paranoia and gather up your datapad, shutting off the holographic projection on the table when he says, out of the blue, "I don't think you're a coward."
You jump nearly three feet in the air. The room had mostly cleared out, and any stragglers were busy talking amongst themselves, oblivious to the sheer terror running through their captain's veins.
"Jesus Christ, Mark! You scared me."
He raises an eyebrow. "How? I've been right here this whole time."
"It was unexpected, alright?" you huff, clutching your heart. "Give a person a warning, would ya?"
There's a fond smile on his lips, one that rounds his cheeks and narrows his eyes in a good way. That's when what he said hits you.
"Wait. What did you just say?"
"I said I've been right here—"
"No, no. The first thing."
"What, about me not thinking you were a coward?"
Your jaw drops, and every single cell in your body is screaming to run. He fucking heard you last night. He knows. He knows.
"I don't think you are. I never thought you were. I still stand by my opinion of you from the first time I met you."
You don't know what to do. He tilts his head down so that he can look you in the eye, and strangely enough, you find yourself unable to pull away.
“Captain, I’m going to be very presumptuous for a moment.”
Your mouth mimics that of a goldfish. “E-excuse me?”
“And I will go ahead and repeat myself again. You’re the bravest person I know. I don’t think you’re a coward. And even if you were, I wouldn’t think any less of you.”
You maintain eye contact, but you find yourself at a loss for words.
He steps closer, and there’s no malice or anger on his face. All you see is your head engineer, smiling at you like he always has, but there’s something clearer about it. Open fondness, affection, adoration. He tentatively takes your hand, interlocks your fingers together.
“I think you shouldn’t worry too much about being a captain. And I should probably take my own advice and not worry too much about being a head engineer. It’s a hard thing to adjust to when it’s the only thing you’ve known for so long.” He swallows, looks down at your hands. “But I’d still like to see what it’s like to not do that. Just someone going on a date with the person they like.”
It finally hits you.
You close your mouth, and you feel your features morph into something incredibly hopeful.
“I think I’d like to see that too,” you beam. Then, “Would you like to go on a date with me, Mark?”
The answering grin he gives you is blinding, and your chest is aflutter.
“Yes,” he squeezes your hand, saying your name. It sounds wonderful coming from his lips. “Yes, I would love that.”
buy me a coffee!
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theknightmarket · 1 month
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"We've made it this far."
In which the Engineer and the captain are released from the effects of the wormhole, as they've always wanted. TW: cursing, angst, slight reference to gore Pages: 26 - Words: 9,500
[Requests: OPEN]
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“Please, just hold on.” 
After dying so many times, it was weird to be on the edge of it. You’d tossed yourself off the cliff enough to memorize the feeling of falling, of becoming weightless and letting everything go – like a kind of acceptance, even if you were going not of your own volition. It had always been okay, though, because you’d come back seconds later, spat back up from a raging ocean with salt and spray into the arms of that cryo-pod. 
“I can get you out of here, don’t worry, I can do it.” 
But this time, you were looking down, your feet on the ground and the water seeming so far away. You had to make the choice now, of staying on that crumbling cliff, battled by the wind, and forced to stare straight at the fate you were faced with, or letting your feet shift and lose traction. 
“Come on, please, I know you can do it.” 
In theory, it was an easy decision, but you didn’t want to have to work for it anymore. You had done the hard part, the surviving at the peak, and now, you knew that this would be the last time. It wasn’t as though you could take a step back; you would always be watching the tips of the waves snap at you. You didn’t want to watch anymore.
You croaked out a simple, “Mark…” 
Your faithful engineer, kneeled at your side, likely for the last time. He wasn’t going to fall. He couldn’t. 
“No, no, please, don’t do that, just a little longer,” his pleads reached your ears well, but you forced yourself to ignore them, “our medics will be here, just wait.”
“Mark, I can’t.”
“No, you can, you have to!” Guilt tapped at the edge of your mind, you didn’t let it in, and it stayed right where it was. “Please.”
“I’m sorry,” you sighed. You were. You really were. 
“Come on, the- the colony haven’t said goodbye, the crew…” His thought went unfinished, but you understood him. You always did, even when he didn’t understand himself. You were half sure he didn’t know what he was saying, the panic and dread overwhelming him in a fight for majority. 
You assured him, “They’ll be fine.”
“Not without you.” 
“Mark, look,” a cough wracked your upper body like an earthquake, “look at it all, we’ve made it this far, haven’t we?”
You were so damn proud of him, of the whole ship, of everything. You never told him directly, so you could only hope he knew. It would make this whole thing easier if he knew that you were proud of him, that you trusted him. He’d be easier on himself.
“Not far enough! We still have more to do, we- we can’t do it without you. You’re our captain.” A distant memory from just a few days before floated to the forefront of your mind. It was hazy, corrupted by the pain, but it was there. “You’re my captain.”
A deep breath in, as far as the pressure would allow you, before you whispered, “You built the ship, you hired the crew, you fixed the warp-core.” 
And suddenly you wished that you hadn’t been able to take that breath – that you had stayed silent and let the moment envelop you. The spark of realisation that you cherished in Mark’s eyes dug a pit in your stomach. 
“No,” was all you could say with what little energy you had left.
“But—”
“Uh-uh. Not this time.” 
You couldn’t, he couldn’t, neither of you would be able to handle another round of what you went through together. That quality of stubbornness you both possessed would surely fail you, abandoning you to the madness of eternity, worse if you failed.
“Why not!? I know how to do it, and we know how to fix it.”
“We got off on chance, you’re not trying that again, Mark, I can’t—”
Shit. That little energy was becoming smaller and smaller, but neither did you have it in you to let Mark create another wormhole. You couldn’t live with yourself if he gave you a second chance. 
“I’m not losing you,” you muttered, “and, yeah, I know how ironic that is.” 
You wanted to laugh, but all that burning the candle at both ends was catching up to you. The numbness that had crept up on your legs hours ago was lurching onto your torso. It wouldn’t be long before it was biting through your arms and neck, and you wouldn’t be aware of it when it reached your temple. 
“So, hey, just… just give me this. Please?”
The look in his eyes washed away. Leaving Mark like this was not your plan, but when had the universe ever listened to you? You could be thankful that you hadn’t gone insane in a place lightyears from your home, that Mark was not leaving you. You admitted that it was a selfish thought, but you didn’t think you could keep going if you lost him. You’d fought hard, but now you were done fighting. You knew he could do it for you.
And so did he. It was a cold admittance that he wouldn’t be the one to save you, this time. It felt all too much like giving up on the person who had sacrificed themself time and time again for him. Although it left a poor taste in his mouth – bitter, unwelcome, downright painful – you had proven to be steadfast in your decisions. There was going to be no convincing you.
“I love you.” If Mark was given a do-over, no strings attached, that would not be the first time he was saying it to you, aloud, just the two of you, and it wouldn’t be the last. 
And maybe he would have gotten to hear it from you just once. 
Your final breath cascaded against his knees, a waterfall that seemed eons from growing dry but dripped slowly into the grave it dug for itself. There was no sound, no last rites read, except for the heartbroken sob that broke free from Mark’s chest, echoing around the cavern walls.
Seeing the sun after so long in space was strange. Of course, you could look out of one of the many windows that Mark had installed and see a sun, but to stand in the rays of light from the sun of this galaxy? It made you want to brush off your duties, it made you want to throw your jacket off and run into the forest, it…
It made you miss Earth.
After exploring space for so long, you were always surprised that, wherever you landed, you felt homesick in the bottom of your stomach. The feeling slept when you were in transit and reared its head when you started to set up a colony, but it never truly disappeared after that. Hell, not even the visits back to your birth planet fixed the issue. The best thing you came up with was bringing little pieces along for the ride. 
But you didn’t have the time to reminisce. Just as you’d mentioned earlier, you had a colony to establish, and it was well on its way already. A dozen sectors sketched out, concrete paths linking each one to the other. There were still a majority of people left in their cryo-chambers, those that weren’t necessary for building or planning, who were being looked after by Celci. Gunther was on observation for threats – a duty he often groaned about – and Bert was waxing poetic while the rudimentary power generators were being built. So far, everything was looking good. As in, nothing was going to blow up immediately and force you back on that ship.
No, instead, there you were. Standing in front of your growing colony, the sun glinting off the metal of the parked ship, your feet on the ground of a healthy, new planet. How could you not let a prideful smile work its way onto your face underneath the helmet you had yet to take off? You had made it, and, if you squinted, you could practically see the bustling city this place would become. Stores on one end of the street, restaurants on the other, further down would be a sector of houses with a public park and a fountain. Young families would walk to their parents’ house, the group of teenagers would have no problem just talking to each other during dark nights, old lovers would duck from the rain into shaded alleyways to share one last kiss before heading home for a warm bath.
You caught the eye of your head engineer leaning against the head of the ship. 
And not that you knew it, you had also caught his eye, only that was a gross underestimation. Mark had been with you every step of the way on the ship, he’d seen what you could do, what you had done to save the crew and colonists. You’d long ago seized his admiration, and, soon after that, his affection, leading to where he stood in that moment; watching you as you ordered everything that needed to be done to be done, waiting for his own set of instructions that he would carry out perfectly.
Until you made eye contact with him, smiled, and then began to walk away. Mark’s feet were moving before he could process what was happening, and if he started to jog after a few steps, that was between him and the ship wall that he pushed off from. He slid to a stop when he was close enough to you, an unsure half-grin on his face.
“Hey, Captain,” he said as he fell into step beside you.
“Is everything alright, Mark?” was the only reply he got, though that was likely because of his expression more than any doubt you held.
To ease your concern, he tried not to make it too obvious that he was nervous. 
“Yeah!” The barely hidden voice crack did not help, but he continued anyway, “Yeah, it is, I mean- is there anything you want me to do?” 
Requesting work was difficult for him. Not because he naturally took things easy, but because he had been on his feet for the last he-didn’t-know-how-long. Hours, days, he hoped not weeks. It didn’t feel right to not do anything. 
“Why don’t you take the day off?” 
Panic struck him like a physical force. He didn’t remember doing anything wrong, you could have still been angry about the whole incident, but he thought everything had been cleared up on the ship’s bridge. Had you already given him a job and he hadn’t been paying attention? Well, could you blame him if he wasn’t? 
It was in this train of thought that he realized you were waiting for a response. So, you weren’t mad. That was good. 
“Is now the best time?” he asked, “It’s your decision, of course, I just think—”
You stopped short of the next sector, some grid for farming, “Look, you’ve been to hell and back—” and hell and back and hell and back and hell and back, as you were both well aware, “—I think you deserve some time to yourself.” 
‘Time to yourself’. He didn’t want time to himself, he wanted… well, he wanted a lot of things and, to put it bluntly, he wanted some time with you, but you weren’t about to take a rest anytime soon, so neither was he.
“And while I appreciate the offer, Captain, there’s a lot to be done that I think is more important than having a break.”
You watched his face for a second, looked up and down as he started to sweat underneath the layers of his uniform. “Repeat that for me.”
“And while I appreciate the offer, Cap...”
His trailing off made clear the realization he came to. You sent him a knowing look, as he groaned like a kid told he couldn’t have another cookie. Of course, it made you smile, too. His dramatics were the highlight of your day when it wasn’t his stubbornness and jokes.
Today, he was vastly leaning into the former. “Only five minutes!” he demanded, scrolling through his arm-piece to set a timer.
“Ten.”
He scrolled slightly further. “Seven.”
“Fifteen.”
And slightly further. “Twelve.”
Your bout of laughter echoed through the trees around you. “You aren’t getting this, are you?” Mark’s arm was tugged away from him as you swiped through the timer yourself. He might have argued about it more if he weren’t so preoccupied with being close enough to kiss you right now if he had the gall to lean that slight bit towards you.
And, you were his captain, obviously, who was he to challenge your authority?
“Take the day off, Mark, and that’s an order from your captain.” You left him with a pat to his shoulder, luckily not noticing the vibrant blush spreading on his face that was too strong to blame the sun for.
He muttered to himself when you were a few steps away, “Pulling rank isn’t fair.” And he was certain that it wasn’t. It was a trump card, some ex-machina that you had no right to use on him. 
But he had his own little trick up his sleeve, or, rather, on his belt. You insisted on using some of the old-world commodities, even by Earth standards. The communicator on his hip with the antennae and grating would be his ace in the whole for your dumb day off punishment—
“And no using your walkie!”
“Damn it.” 
You were tired. Really tired. You’d slept a day and a half after the whole wormhole incident, and yet here you were, looking at every slightly level surface with literal bedroom eyes. You constantly had to remind yourself to pay attention, but that just made you think about paying attention and not listen to the person you were talking to – who, in this case, was Celci. As such, you were half sure it was important to the whole colony, relying on her reputation, mostly, because again, you weren’t paying attention, and you were actually imagining lying down on that rock you’d seen half an hour ago with the moss and grooves.
You weren’t listening, again.
“Or I could send you the report for you to look over later?”
When you snapped back to reality, you were none the wiser as to what that report was about, but it gave you time to figure it out. “Oh, yeah, that’d be great, Celci, thanks.”
She gave you one look and then asked, “Captain, is everything alright?” 
The half grin took most of your energy, so you promptly dropped it when you remembered that she couldn’t see your face. “Am I that obvious?”
“If you need a break, I can go and check the excavation site and one of the techs can do the propane levels. I’m sure I could get Mark—”
You immediately rushed to cut her off, “No, no, I’m fine. I appreciate the thought but I-I’m fine, really.” Jostling your body and comically widening your eyes, you made yourself as presentable as you could with a quarter of your fuel in the tank. You dusted off your suit and cleared the screen of your helmet, extremely thankful for the metal that made it a one-way mirror. “See?”
Celci hummed at you. Not a good sign. She was arguably the most responsible on the ship, and if she thought you were putting yourself through the ringer, she would do everything in her power to get you to relax. The only problem she faced was ranking, and it was the only thing protecting you from being forced into a nap. You had to get away before she could figure out how to circumvent your title.
“C’mon, Celci, don’t you think I know my limits?”
Disapproving silence. Even starting to walk away from her, you knew how little she believed you. 
“We only have to get through another three hours of work, and then everyone’ll be able to finish up; myself included.”
“Well, Captain…” And there was the crack you needed. Hesitation. 
“Besides, if we get the thermos running, we’ll be able to house some of the colonists and you can focus your efforts on the desert habitation.” That was her little pet project. When you’d scanned the surface, you found two nearby biomes that would barely receive any rain but stayed in the negative fifties for your entire surveillance period. It was backhanded to bait her with the idea, you knew that, but if it got you out of a glorified grounding, you were willing to do it.
Especially since it seemed to work, if Celci’s sigh and hands on her hips were anything to go by.
“Alright, Captain, as long as you finish as soon as the day ends.”
You exchanged a nod with varying degrees of satisfaction with that encounter, before going your separate ways. In fact, you did get a little jolt of energy out of it, as you waltzed along the concrete path. Any thoughts of taking a break were washed out of your mind by the torrent of work you still had left to do; all the sites to check out, all the staff to organize, all the paperwork to send back to the headquarters. The latter was always the worst part, but it was the price you paid for independence on the planet. Free reign was only yours if you played by your boss’ rules.
“Captain!”
Speaking of boss’ rules, as if on cue, Mark jogged to your side from wherever he was before, falling into step quickly next to you. You wouldn’t deny that seeing him gave you another boost of energy, which you immediately used to pat him on the back.
“How’s your break going?”
“I’d rather be doing actual work, but it’s fine. I appreciate it.”
“Good.”
And it was. You were glad he was taking it slow today. He was important to you, and the colony, and you didn’t need your head engineer passing out in the middle of an important task. Or passing out in general. Or doing anything else bad for his health that you could readily prevent.
He appeared alright, for now, although that wasn’t going to get him back on a job just yet. “Actually, I was wondering if—” he started to say, but a crew member cut him off with the crunch of their boots as they rushed towards you from out the surrounding woods.
Their report was normal enough, a few more pieces of information about the excavation site. They’d found another source of aluminum in the caves, which you noted down in case your supplies ran low. Mark waited at your side while you spoke to the person, half-way between listening and grumbling to himself. You couldn’t help but laugh quietly as you dismissed the crew member.
“Sorry, go on,” you said. The pair of you continued to walk, heading nowhere in particular aside from in the vague direction of the housing project.
He did as you prompted, getting out, “Well, I wanted to know—” before someone else called for your attention. Given you were nearing the first constructions of houses, it made sense that a builder caught up to you – despite that, you noticed Mark’s pout as he averted his eyes from the conversation you’d been drawn into. Just a material substitution you needed to sign off on, it was nothing to get worried about, but it was obvious that wasn’t what he was annoyed by.
You gestured with a grin for Mark to continue. Mouth only somewhat open, he paused and looked around, then rounded to your other side to cut you off from the majority of the workers. It was a futile effort, given that you were fast approaching the mass of houses, but it amused you either way. A combination of that drama and humor you were so fond of.
“I think, considering what we went through—” There was barely a crack of a twig in your ten-foot radius when Mark grabbed you by the hand and ran off the path. He didn’t know where he was going, and you definitely didn’t, but you were going regardless. His boots carved a line from the housing district all the way back to the ship. Hardly anyone was there anymore, only a few cryo-techs were loitering around to survey the colonists, so it was his best bet to get you alone, however creepy that made him sound. 
You weren’t given time to question him when you eventually skidded to a stop in a quiet area behind the ship itself. Mark was talking even before you caught your breath.
“I think that you should take some time off too because you went through the same things that I did, and, yes, I know you’re the captain, but having some time to recover from it all would be just as good as me taking some time, even better, because you made all the decisions back there, so you should just relax and I have some suggestions for how you can do that.” 
By the end of his little speech, neither of you were breathing at a steady rate. You both sucked in as much air as you could handle and then let it go again, minds catching up with the situation. For you, it was processing his words and what he wanted from you – for Mark, it was realizing just what he’d spouted and how utterly unconvincing he was.
It was another challenge to understand that you accepted. “I’m listening,” you said, simply, as if you couldn’t say anything else.
Mark spluttered, not thinking he’d get so far but being so far that he had to continue.
“I say we should take some food packs from storage, find an empty room, and have a proper lunch. We won’t talk about work or duties to be done, or anything else, and we’ll lock the door so nobody will interrupt us.” That last bit came from the depths of his soul, Mark grimacing as he spoke. “The colony will be there when we get back. And, if you think about it, getting some rest will help you make better decisions in the long run.”
“Okay.”
Okay. You’d said okay. You’d okayed it. You were going with his plan. Pride overwhelmed him against his mind’s efforts to keep up with his heart and stomach’s backflips. His body froze in response, giving you the concerning impression that you’d broken him with a single word. Lucky for you, he rebooted himself in a few seconds, though he was still unable to curb his enthusiasm.
“Yes. Yes! Alright, let’s go.”
Mark went to reach for your hand but quickly noticed that he was still holding it from when he’d dragged you with him. Instead, sheepishly, he smiled at you and started to walk towards the ship’s entrance, you chuckling to yourself in tow.
If you were going to take a break, you might as well be taking it with your favorite person. What did you have to lose?
“I’m hoping for cool fish.”
“Nope.”
Within half an hour, the both of you were settled on beanbags, eating soup out of Styrofoam bowls, and drinking the champagne you had left over from the salute at the start of the trip. To you, it was the height of luxury, especially now that you were out of your stuffy uniforms and into more casual clothes. The only ones you owned were your workout gear and nightwear, but you opted for the less sweaty version of a tank top and shorts. You didn’t think it was so bad, but Mark had spent the first ten minutes of the lunch break looking anywhere but you. It didn’t help when you went to get your helmet and jacket because he immediately jumped to push you back down into your seat. Not that you – or, though you were unaware, Mark – was complaining.
Still, you kept the outer layers of your uniform close by in case of an emergency, the chances of you being notified as minimal as they were with both your walkie-talkies having been switched off. It was you who pushed for them to be present, but the compromise made them pretty much useless.
Yet not even the potential of a natural disaster pulled you out of the relaxed state you had entered. Slipped down halfway into the beanbag, spread out as far as you could get, you felt calmer than you’d ever been before. Mark would say the same, had he not been seeing your face for the first time.
By the sun, moon, and stars, you were… downright gorgeous. He never liked relying on rumors, so he had taken the stories of you being handsome and/or beautiful to be one weird game of telephone. Now, though? He was regretting not asking to see your face sooner, but you were still in front of him, and he was going to relish the view for as long as he could, emergency be damned.
“First chance I get, I’m throwing you in an ocean,” you promised, taking a sip from your champagne flute.
“I’m taking you with me.”
“I want to see it. Maybe we’ll find a fifty-foot-long eel with three sets of teeth and mandibles on its face.” 
“You’ll find some cool rocks and suffocate before you could even see the thing.”
Dammit. Just like that, with one sentence, Mark smothered the banter you had going. His jaw clenched, your shoulders heightened, the mood was thrown out the window – poor choice of words, again. He had meant it to be playful, but certain recent events tainted the very concept of losing oxygen, of holding your breath for longer than a minute. Gallows humor had yet to set in, and, based on the glazed-over look in your eyes, he couldn’t help but think it never would.
But you were the one to break the silence. “So, what now?” you asked as you placed the flute gently on the floor, glass clinking even as it stood straight.
“Cap,” was the only mumbled answer you received, though it didn’t deter you.
“I know, it’s just…” you sighed, “we can’t not talk about it?”
“Why not?”
Your gaze shot to meet Mark’s eyes, ready and raring to argue, to question how he can deny it. The flame died the second you saw the look. The watery film that threatened tears dumped dirt over your fury. It made sense that he would want to leave it behind. You had the colony to think of now, instead of the death after death after death you’d both faced in the wormhole. You understood that want to ignore it all, but you couldn’t fall into the trap. You couldn’t face another night with it hanging over your head. The bags underneath those wet eyes of his told you he couldn’t either.
Shakily, you whispered, careful not to set him off, “Because it happened. And it was a serious moment in our lives that we can’t ignore. And- and what if it all goes wrong again and we need to prepare to deal with it?”
“Then we’ll do what we did last time.”
“Get stuck?”
“Get through it.” Distantly, you wondered why you were the one to make that first speech. You were the captain, sure, but Mark made you believe him with just one incomplete sentence. He made you trust him in three words, no matter how much your mind fought to tell you otherwise, your heart did indeed trust him. “I mean, we’ve come this far, how hard can it be?” A weak chuckle. “I’d wager getting Gunther to not shoot the first thing he saw when he got off the ship was a lot harder than what we did.”
You didn’t feel like laughing. Instead, talking about the crew, it made you feel… something else. An intangible well of guilt and shame. You could get through another wormhole, but everyone else? What if they got caught? What if they started to remember all the death and fire and pain? You wouldn’t be able to help them, not like last time. If they remembered, they’d be at the edge with you, staring over the side. How many of them could take it? The crew or the colonists themselves? You would have failed them all. You might not have killed them, but they’d be casualties, nonetheless.
“Hey.” Your head snapped up to see Mark at eye level with you, leaning over to bring a hand to your upper arm. “We’d get through it. I know we would.”
But you still looked forward, unblinking, and it only took a second for Mark to realise he was wrong. If he wanted to be scientific about it, he would have just called it trauma bonding – if he wanted to be emotional about it, which he didn’t but he was going to be, he would have thought that all your time together brought you closer, not only because of the danger you experienced, but the comradery. Seeing you in action, seeing you take care of everyone, seeing you be the captain you were meant to be; Mark was sure he understood you. That meant he could see that guilt and shame as clear as day in your eyes.
He let himself fall forward to flop down next to you in your beanbag. Even though he was slightly uncomfortable, pressed against the strangely stiff surface, he stayed right where he was. Nestled against your side. He couldn’t think of a better place to be.
“I don’t understand why you do this.”
“It’s one of my charming quirks.”
You still didn’t feel like laughing, not even at your own poor joke, so you dropped your gaze to Mark. “What are you talking about?” you asked.
“You pretend like you aren’t the captain.”
“Do I?” Plead the fifth or whatever it was people said, and you didn’t care about the irony of you being the one to deny now.
He narrowed his eyes, barely shifting closer but shifting closer regardless. You felt your breath catch in your throat. “Yeah, you do,” he pushed as the hand that was on your arm circled around to the other shoulder. You resisted the voice in your mind that told you to bury your head in his neck, whether that was to avoid hearing him or to relish in his closeness that you never had the chance for.
You didn’t though, head remaining held high, so you were forced to listen when he continued, “You tried to get a smaller crew, you go in on the explorations yourself, you ignore the medics who try to help you.”
Another voice in the back of your mind perked up to rebuke it all, but you silenced it. What would be the point of lying? Mark knew you, you knew he knew you, there was no reason to fight it.
You sighed. “Well, I don’t know.” Your voice was small, smaller than you or Mark had ever heard it, but the admittance felt like it was enough to send a shockwave through the cabin. The jacket that showcased your title to everyone on the planet seemed to blaze in your mind. “Am I really their captain yet?”
“’Yet’?” Mark parroted you, and that was the go-ahead you needed to spill your thoughts.
“I missed the construction of the ship and the selection of the crew. The hour that I got onto the thing, everything went to shit, so many things went wrong. I- I don’t know if I deserve this, being the captain, when I didn’t spend any time with the people running the ship. Hell, even without the whole wormhole thing, we were going to be in cryo-sleep for the entire journey. I wasn’t needed.” The flood of words tumbled out with reckless abandon and then stopped like crashing into a wall like a bike going eighty. You didn’t think you would go through with it otherwise. Inner voices or a sense of decorum threatened to overtake you.
And yet, even though you got to the end of your rant, red-faced and breathless, you were knocked more off-balance by Mark’s question. “How many times did you die?”
“What?”
His eyes were trained on you. “How many times did you die?”
“I don’t remember, maybe thirty?”
“So, you died thirty times for yourself?”
Indignation sparked within your heart. “No, I did it for the ship,” you stated bluntly, “the crew and the colonists.” You weren’t certain what his point was, but if you had to use your authority-voice on him, you were going to.
“Repeat that for me.”
“I did it for…”
That was his point, then. Your shoulders relaxed, though you didn’t notice that you’d raised them, and your eyebrows unfurrowed. In return, Mark’s smile brightened, like he’d caught the canary. Caught you, more like. 
You stared deadpan down at him but brought a hand up to card through his hair. Without his beret, it was looser, more befitting of him as a person instead of the head engineer. The corners of his mouth perked up even more. “See, I don’t like it when you use my own tactics on me.”
His laugh reverberated through your own bones, especially when he dropped his head to your collarbone. It wasn’t awkward, in fact, you were soon chuckling along with him at his happiness more than your joke – it felt natural, but you were still aware that this was the closest you had ever been. Relaxed into the beanbag the two of you now shared, trying to avoid knocking over your flutes of champagne, practically cradling each other in your arms. If the wormhole had been like this, maybe you would have appreciated it more.
“Someone who doesn’t deserve to be captain would have left the ship to explode and taken an emergency pod back to the nearest planet.” His speech, like his trailing off giggles, shook your muscles as sparks of electricity. “They wouldn’t have died for them, and you did. You are their captain.”
Hesitation. You saw it as bright at the sun of your new home in the sky. You saw it rise in Mark’s eyes, you saw it crescendo, and you saw it dip into the horizon.
“You’re my captain.”
Whatever thought ran through his mind, it was gone by the time he pushed through the final inch between you, leaving barely a breath in the interim. You could feel the puffs of hot air bat against your jaw, nose and lips. The role he gave you meant more than the legislation, the rule, the empty title. Now, it was trust. Him in you, and you in him.
For a moment, you thought he might bridge the gap, but his mouth opened before anything could progress. That didn’t mean either of your minds had strayed from the idea. He whispered under his breath, as if it would escape the room had he spoken any louder, “Do you want to have dinner tomorrow night?”
“As in a date?”
“Yeah. A date.”
Mark could feel his heart beating faster. He could have denied it and represented it something like the scenario you were in now. There was a part of him that thought he should have; it shied away from the very possibility of rejection and cowered in the clasp of regulations and human resources. But he had already taken the leap, the words hovering in the air. It would be a proper date – with candles and music and something better to eat than soup in a Styrofoam bowl. You’d talk about whatever came to mind, plans for the future instead of the past, and you’d share a bottle of wine as you spoke. The flicker of flame would highlight you from below and he would see exactly what he was describing in your eyes. His future. If the night went well, you’d clear the table together, strangely domestic against the memories of the journey over, and then, with the candlelight still dancing on the table before the fire was snuffed out, he hoped to share a kiss together. He could almost feel it already.
While his imagination was a thing to behold, it could not take credit for that sensation, but while Mark was so lost in his prospects, he failed to notice that the future was coming to pass. Or some of it, anyway.
You weren’t sitting at a table, a glass of wine and wax dripping onto the table; you were closer than before, with your lips pressed against his and your eyes closed.
Mark was knocked breathless. The sensation was nothing he could have predicted; the pressure was soft, gentle, like a silk ribbon, but the texture exposed how you would bite the same places when you were worried. Worried? What reason did you have to be worried? You were the greatest captain he had ever heard of, let alone known. He wanted to tell you just that, but he was preoccupied, for obvious reasons, with pushing you down against the hill of the beanbag. Maybe he was bias – your groan reverberated through his skin – but he didn’t really have a choice – your fingertips skimmed across his hair – and he was sure that you were objectively the best anyway – your teeth grazed over his lips – so it didn’t really matter. He brought one of his own hands to hover over your jaw, barely making contact until a particular hum had him brushing his thumb across your cheek. You leaned into it, as if it were a military ration, and he supposed it must have felt like that. Roles like yours didn’t tend to come with company.
Inwardly, he pledged that he would never let you feel alone again.
Outwardly, in an ill-fated scuffle to reposition himself, a dull thunk and something spilling onto the floor caused the two of you to slowly, begrudgingly, part. A few puffs of air settled between you as you turned to see Mark’s semi-full glass that had fallen over.
With a laugh, you settled your head against Mark’s shoulder, both to stabilize yourself and spare him the embarrassment of a steadily reddening face.
“So, that date tomorrow?” Despite the last five minutes, Mark couldn’t help but be shaky in asking. Either that, or it was aftereffects of his heart going 210 instead of the normal 60 beats per minute.
“As long as,” you whispered before grabbing your own champagne for another sip, “we get to find a large body of water tomorrow.”
“That sounds a lot like an ocean, Cap.”
“Well, if you insist, we can find an ocean.”
With your final poke at his expense, enough to wave away the remaining fog of tension no matter the nature, you downed the last of your champagne and settled further into your beanbag. For once, you didn’t regret taking a break, and you were sure you would need another breather after the excavation the following day.
“It’s my project, it has my name signed on the documents.”
So far, the day had proven successful. Three more biomes were scouted out, one of them being a potentially perfect site for farming, and the first real town had been built. At the beginning, it had looked like one of those places built to test nuclear weapons – but then, just two hours ago, they had moved the first colonists into their houses. You had been there to greet them, shake their hands and pass them the keys, but you had to leave before they could get fully settled. Besides, that was Celci’s job. The whole transfer from cryo operation was under her jurisdiction.
However, now that the residents were all making beds and organizing cupboards, Mark had to deal with her. And by deal with her, he meant argue, because there wasn’t another way the situation could ever turn out.
Presently, the pair were standing outside a section of the colony, Mark’s section, with blueprints in hands and scowls on faces. A slap against the paper was followed by Celci’s gesture towards the energy source.
“That means you were the one who started to involve cryo-tech, and that means I need to have some input.”
Mark scoffed, even though he knew full well that she was, technically, just barely, if you looked at it a certain way, correct. Just the word cold was her full job description, but he assumed he would get away with it if she were busy with other things. How wrong he was. Ever the eye for detail, Celci had searched through all the project applications, filtering for anything below 30 degrees, and then promptly set up meetings with all the leads. She wasn’t aware that it was Mark heading this one until she walked up the concrete path. Mark wasn’t aware that it was Celci he was meeting with until he heard her groan.
Go figure, they had made no progress.
“You know, I would love to prove you wrong on this,” Mark hissed, “but, unlike you, I can’t spend all day arguing about this.”
Was it backhanded to boast about your date and use it to get away from an argument, which he totally wasn’t losing, in one sentence? Probably. Was he doing it anyway? Yes.
However, Celci wasn’t one to give up that easily. Mark barely got two steps backwards before she took one toward him in return. “No, you know I’m right, so you’re running away.”
“Actually, I have a date tonight.” The pride and amazement took over the scowl on his face. For a moment, he forgot he was talking to someone and that he wasn’t just staring into his mirror, trying to convince himself it wasn’t a dream while he picked out an outfit.
“Who with? Your Roomba?”
In any other situation, he would have leaned into the mockery, tried harder to think of a better comeback, but the truth worked well enough. With a grin, Mark corrected, “The Captain.”
A flurry of emotions danced over Celci’s face that Mark was so glad he was able to see. He didn’t think he’d ever seen her confused before, much less shocked, though there were plenty of times she looked at him with endless doubt. They rolled over and over like a broken projector before she finally landed on a stranger expression – bemusement.
“Finally.”
It was his turn to look confused.
She tutted and looked him dead in the eye. “You can’t think that nobody’s seen the love-sick puppy look you give them when they’re nearby.”
The splutter was hard to contain, despite it being very obviously undignified, but it was harder to get back on his feet. So many questions swirled around his mind, most of them trying to preserve whatever image he thought he presented, but he came up blank. It was, annoyingly, likely that she was once again right. But it wasn’t his fault, not when you were, well, you. Of course, he wouldn’t call it love-sick, though that didn’t stop it from being accurate. 
Mark’s lack of response was enough for Celci to know she’d caught him red-handed. Just typical. With the upper hand, she continued, “But I happen to know that your dinner isn’t until seven, so that gives us five hours for you to see reason.” He tried to protest, opening his mouth to ask how she actually found that information out, before she held up a hand. “Or, what, does it take that long to get your hair like that?”
Inwardly, Mark cursed her. He lost his way out of the conversation, and, in doing so, was welcomed by the colony’s rumor mill. What a prize. At least things weren’t spun out of proportion, but he would have preferred the date to be private at first. He could only hope that the crew had enough sense to leave them alone for the night.
Right now, however, he still had to prove to Celci that he didn’t need her supervision.
“I just don’t understand why you want to get involved with this!” he groaned.
“Because it’s a safety issue if I don’t.”
“It’s not gonna explode.”
“You’ll find a way.”
“I’m not doing anything outside of regulations, it—”
A crackle. Something like a fire burning. His heart rate piped up. Celci started to spin, but Mark was quick to grab at his belt. The walkie-talkie was stirring from its sleep in one of the pouches. He preferred the tech they’d designed for the mission, but he wouldn’t deny you your pieces of Earth. Plus, the stickers were always a bonus.
He drew Celci’s attention as he pressed the button down. Silently, he waved away her own smug grin – the one that told him he looked exactly like a love-sick puppy.
“Hey, Cap, everything alright?”
You never stuck with the whole over and out thing. It was the compromise given they had replaced it with a light to show when the other side’s button was pressed down. To Mark, it made more sense and improved efficiency. What was concerning, though, was that the light was on, red and blazing, but you weren’t talking.
He pressed it closer to his ear. 
Just breathing.
“Cap? Captain, are you okay?”
He was struggling to keep his smile.
Especially when your voice whispered through the machine, gravelly and choked, as if there were hands wrapped around your neck.
“Hey, Mark.”
“Captain.”
“I’m, uh—” You were broken apart by a cough, “—prob’ly gonna be late to dinner—” Another cough, “—tonight.”
It sounded like your lungs were being ripped at the tubes and emptied. Mark’s heart felt like it was shattering.
“Where are you?”
Radio silence. The shards cracked further and refracted the light into searing flames through his veins. Just as sharp, he brought his gaze up to Celci.
“Where is the Captain right now?”
“Didn’t make a copy of their schedule?”
It was meant to be banter, a little poke at their relationship, something to get a deadpan look and an eye roll.
Mark looked more scared than she had ever seen him.
“Third excavation site. North.”
And, at the final word, he was gone, sprinting down the concrete path. The wind carried him in subtle support while some of the crew watched the storm rush past them. They had no clue what was happening, but neither did Mark. He only knew that he had to get to you, no matter what. He had to be there for you.
The walkie felt like it was burning in his grip. An omen and a promise at the same time. He pulled it to his mouth, as though just hearing his voice clearer would let him understand everything. “Cap, Cap, come on, what happened?”
Nothing. Silence outside of his body, which itself sounded like a zoo set loose. It was the eeriness of a broken submarine. He could hear the crunching of the water against the sides as it threatened to ball the metal up with the ease of a wad of paper, but there was still a dismal quiet in the meantime.
“Captain!”
And he couldn’t do a damn thing to help.
Some of the pressure released when he heard your whisper, “Cave in.” It was decorated with crackles and pops, but he heard it crystal clear, every single one of your words its own speech. “Do-don’t come, Mark, don’t.”
His footsteps picked up impossibly faster to match his heart rate.
“I swear, I will,” you choked for a second before you were saved with a cough, “I will pull rank on you.”
“You can do that later. When you’re not crushed under rocks. You can do it at dinner.”
“Mark, I’m not…”
“Yes, you are!”
He swept round a corner. The danger signs for the excavation site came into view. Just a little longer. He didn’t know if you had a little longer. Your breathing was already ragged when you called, and it was getting worse. He knew he should have been pouring all of his energy into getting to you – for once, he admitted it would be better for him to shut up and focus – but he couldn’t handle the silence.
“Okay, okay, pull rank on me,” he pleaded, “just keep talking. Please.” You yielded to his request with a smile that he couldn’t see. “You named the colony yet?” His job. Technically, it was supposed to be the captain who named the colony, but you had given that duty to him. You’d argued that he was the one to choose the planet, so he should have been the one to name it. Just the thought of it made him sick to his stomach. It was too early for delegation, you didn’t need to do it yet, and there would be no reason to later because you would be alive and well. You’d do your job and he’d do his. There would be no exchange because a role couldn’t be filled.
But the declaration was fueled by doubt even in his own mind. 
“No, I was waiting for you,” Mark answered.
“You should name it.”
“I’m waiting for you.”
Another cough, as if your own body was working to supply your point. “Can’t wait forever.”
“I won’t be.”
The lack of response stirred something horrible in his gut when he slid into the entrance to the rock site. He pushed past the gates and tape, snagged protective gear from its place hanging off the fence, and immediately rushed to the directors. They were shambling about with checklists in hand and smiles on faces. Mark wanted to laugh, cry, freeze still in his boots. Everything looked so optimistic. This was advancement for a colony of a size like this.
Days later, when the clock would strike midnight and Mark would lay in his bed with the sheets askew and pillows scattered, he wouldn’t remember what he said to the workers he spoke to. Whether he interacted with them, or they interacted with him, it didn’t matter. His words were lost to him in the haze of overwhelming urgency and underwhelming panic. Medics arrived and excavators were called over. He only knew that because a few of them went in with him to the mouth of the cave – if some kind of legal body was contacted, he wasn’t aware of it because they never showed in front of him, and they weren’t helping him find you.
One detail he did recognize though was the tug at the walkie from one of the directors that caused Mark to pull back like a feral cat. They seemingly decided not to risk it, and simply slipped another walkie in his belt. Of course, you’d given the rest of the crew those things, instead of the highly modernized tech that would have stopped this entire thing from happening in the first place – but he couldn’t be mad at you. It wouldn’t have been you otherwise. 
They backed off quickly when they were done, and he held the original close to his chest until he was well within the tomb- not tomb, cave. A normal cave.
He had to find you.
The team he entered with was small. You always liked close-knit things, he supposed that was why you went in by yourself. Something about comradery. You were too old-fashioned for your own good.
He would tell you that at dinner, give you a light smack on the wrist and a kiss on the cheek.
“Mark, are you still there?” Your voice through the walkie reminded him of where he was. Where you were. You sounded terrible, considerably worse than last you spoke, but that was to be expected. 
Focus.
“Of course. I’m not leaving.”
“Thank you."
His heart would have melted had he not been so hyped up on the rush of adrenaline and intangible fear.
“Can you describe what you can see?”
“Lotta rocks.” Your laugh turned into a gravelly groan. “I see a light.”
“Don’t go towards it.”
“I don’t have much choice.” Mark was blissfully unaware of your joke because he was also blissfully unaware that your legs had been mangled by rocks splitting apart your bones and muscles, pulverized like the aftermath of an old blender fed with sticks and banana. You were glad he was.
He was able to, instead, drop down off a ledge deeper into the cave, which was very quickly becoming more of a cavern. It had the distinct feeling of being trapped in an ant hill, with some spaces widening and then others trailing off into sharp points. Wherever you were, getting out would be a problem, too, but seeing a light meant that you were either incredibly deep or just by the surface. He was hoping for the latter.
The next drop down was not promising.
Neither was the walkie startling to life again with your voice. “You know,” you croaked, “when we were in the wormhole, I didn’t think it would end like this.”
“It’s not ending like this.”
You let the words sink into metal grating of the machine before you spoke again, “I thought I’d be shot in that noir place or stay frozen in a cryo-chamber for centuries, I didn’t think I’d just be, uh, crushed.”
The way you phrased it was so inelegant that Mark nearly snorted. However, the reality didn’t let it breach neo-daedism territory.
“Seems a bit boring, in comparison.” He couldn’t tell whether you were mumbling for comedic effect, or your lungs were giving up on you. Uncertainty impaled him like a spear through the chest.
Swallowing, he sighed. “But at least it’s not in the wormhole.”
“At least it’s not in the wormhole.”
It felt too much like a goodbye. A final salute to the ship that sailed off into the distance. Firing the arrow onto the raft. It shouldn’t have given him hope.
But it did; the cavern was bathed with the sunshine from a hole in the ceiling, and the light on the walkie was off.
It didn’t take long to spot you, upper half sticking out from the rubble of a dozen large boulders and even more smaller rocks dusting your back. Frantically, he rushed to your side, barely dodging standing on the discarded walkie a few feet in front of you. You held another to your cheek. Mark wished he had more time to tease you about keeping a whole communicator just for him, then you’d tease him about his own, and then you’d win the argument when he decided to just look at you all alive and active and not steadily dying in a cave. He did not have more time.
He hooked the walkie for the director out of his belt and called for assistance, giving a description of the route he took and then turning it off to pay attention to you.
Your grin was bright but shaky. “You come here often?” 
“Captain…”
“Sorry, bad timing.”
“No, perfect timing.” The chuckle that dripped out from his mouth was tainted by tears brimming in his eyes. He took your hand and tried to ignore how cold it already was. If he had come sooner, would you have more of a chance? Would you have survived? Oh, but you were going to survive anyway, you had to. You were the captain. You were his captain.
“Mark, don’t- don’t get yourself worked up.”
“Or what?”
“Oh, you know.”
He wanted to beg for you to continue the joke. His grip tightened as he brought your hand to his lips. He held it there, waiting, not breathing a single puff of air. The fear of disturbing the scene and being the little bit of wind that a rock needed to jut further into your back was buried deep in his bones.
“Please, just hold on.”
“Mark…”
No.
“Mark, I can’t.”
No, no, no, no.
“I’m sorry.”
Was he saying words?
“They’ll be fine.”
Just a little longer.
“Mark, look… look around, we’ve made it this far, haven’t we?”
His mouth was moving, he was sure of it, but the crackle of the walkie filled his ears in place of his own words.
“You built the ship, you hired the crew, you fixed the warp-core.”
The warp-core. He had done it once before. What’s to say he couldn’t do it again?
“No.”
All that pain, all those deaths, he would do it again.
“Uh-uh. Not this time.”
He would do it for you.
“We got off on chance, you’re not trying that again, Mark, I can’t—”
If you would just let him, he could get you back. He didn’t understand why you were resisting. It would be so easy. You would get to live and lead the colony and be the captain that you always wanted to be.
But he couldn’t deny that it was a lot of woulds. And he couldn’t go through with it without your support. The tears in your eyes were not from pain but from fear, and not even for yourself. You were scared for him. Your head engineer.
“I’m not losing you—” Mark snapped back to the present, “—And, yeah, I know how ironic that is.”
It was ironic, wasn’t it? Not only this situation, but that the two of you, as a pair, had gone through so much together, only to get separated when things had finally calmed down. It was as though you had grown so used to danger that you couldn’t survive without it. Domesticity was not for you, nor was it for Mark. In this lifetime, you would never get a break. And that was one of the two certainties he found.
“So, hey, just- just give me this. Please?”
The other certainty?
“I love you.”
Mark kneeled on the dusty ground of the cave with your hand in his. It was just as cold as the air around you, your breath visible as you sighed a single, “I-…” that trailed off before you could get anything out. The words died in your lungs as your eyes dropped shut.
Mark’s sobs echoed throughout your tomb.
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[Did you know this started out as straight fluff? Also, I will forever be scared of the leviathan from Subnautica]
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coff33notforme · 1 year
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hihi my birthday is coming up soon! i was wondering if you could write how darkiplier, damien, or even engineer mark would react of them not knowing and finding out the day of that it’s my b-day! i hope it’s not too confusing…
A/n: HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY ANON!! I hope you have a great one! ^^, I hope you don't mind that I just did Engineer Mark, I was having trouble writing for the other two, but enjoy none the less!
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Would feel incredibly bad if he found out it was your birthday and didn’t know
Especially since the whole crew knew and had been wishing you well and presenting you with gifts throughout the whole day, much to Marks confusion 
He’s on his hands and knees for forgiveness right now
He’ll do absolutely everything to make it up to you no matter how much you reassure him he’ll insist, so there's no real point in arguing with him
There's not that much you can do in space, and even if there was there's certainly not enough time when your the Captain
But Mark is determined to make your birthday a great one, anything you want or need he’ll do it for you
Hungary, but don’t have enough time to make something? Marks got you, Necks cramped but you don’t have time to take a nap? No problem
He’ll try to whip something up for you the day of, but it probably doesn’t go as planned, it was a nice thought though
And even when the days done, Mark hasn’t finished everything he set out to do
Before you settle down getting ready for sleep Mark knocks on your door
Confused you open it, immediately skeptical as to what could have possibly brought Mark here at this time of night 
He’ll simply hush your questions and concerns as he leads you to a distant room in the ship
But as soon as he reveals what he was planning to you, you gasp in delight
In the room Mark set up a small picnic blanket, covered with your favorite snacks and homemade desserts, you don’t know how he managed to acquire all of the sweets but frankly you didn’t really care
Marks eyes twinkled as he watched the excitement spread across your face, Mark let out a surprised yelp when you threw your arms around him, before he chuckled, hugging you back with the same intensity, smiling as you held each-other
“Happy Birthday Cap.” 
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SPACE BIRTHDAY WOWOWWO
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leighsartworks216 · 1 year
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Your Captain
Engineer Mark x gn!reader
Requested by Anon:
"Sweet! Can i request a angst and fluff fic with engineer mark? Where captain overworks themselves, not taking care of themselves at all, marks sees it but doesn't want to bother them too much about it
And eventually they get really sick and collapse infront of mark
With angst prompts #12 and #17 thank youuuu"
12. "You could have died."
17. "No, no, no, you can't close your eyes right now!"
Tbh this fic started as a completely different concept but I think it fit really well with this request so yah
Warnings: loss of identity, mentions of the warp core events, mentions of death, overworking, exhaustion, hurt/comfort, angst
Word Count: 3906
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The realization is slow. Not in the way a predator creeps on an unsuspecting victim. Nor in the way an illness would, slowly taking over your body and mind until you can no longer ignore your decreasing abilities. No. It’s not even noticeable at first. Little hints here and there, indicative of something bigger.
And then it dawned on you. Suddenly. Like a spark igniting a rampant fire.
It happened when you looked up. The sky was different here. Strange. Nothing like Earth’s. There were no constellations - at least not yet. Two moons circled and twirled around the planet. Your new home.
You had neglected to look up since you landed. You couldn’t blame anyone. There was simply too much to do - buildings in need of building, resources to discover and study, maps to draw up of the surrounding area. Not only that, you joined your leads wherever you could.
You assisted Celci as she and her team revived colonists. You welcomed each new citizen with a smile and Welcome to our new planet! All 100,000 of them. Celci told you to take a break, get a nap, eat something. You would argue that everyone deserved to be welcomed, and it helped you get a grasp on just how many carpenters, engineers, scientists, medics, gun hands and others there actually were. She gave you a worried and disapproving side eye, but she couldn’t do anything to stop you.
Gunther worked to set up a perimeter where the first buildings could be set up. You helped to plan out which buildings went where, and exactly where your borders should be laid. And when he started setting up armed droids to keep an eye out for raging wildlife that could threaten your new beginnings? You were all too happy to put yourself to work, hauling the heavy automechanicals to each designated spot. If he made a comment about exerting yourself, you ignored it and kept on working.
Burt, with the lack of necessity for warp-core engineering (the thought made you flinch), helped out in home-building. He acted as foreman, making sure each sheet of metal had its place. As the framework finished, he and his team went in to affix lights and other electronic necessities. A few engineers even took plumbing jobs. (There was, unfortunately, a lack of those sent over from Earth.) Quiet as he was, the only time he pointed out your willingness to dive head first and help build foundations, framework and walls, was in a poetic waxing after a rather large building neared completion. You said it was a beautiful poem, but you didn’t quite understand its meaning. (You did.)
And Mark. Oh, god, Mark. With each new job you threw yourself into, he was always right there, running around like a headless chicken trying to help. If you were building a wall, he was right behind you (sometimes even right next to you, holding the metal in place as you bolted it in), keeping you up to date with the progress of the colony, messages from Earth, and other such things. He worried over you the most out of anyone else.
You couldn’t blame him, honestly. After the… adventure you both went on, you wouldn’t give yourself the time of day to even close your eyes. Once dark settled in, you threw yourself into paperwork and managerial nonsense. You couldn’t stop.
It had been one of these nights when you realized. You just finished talking to Celci, discussing the discoveries being made. The scientists just started working with the security crew to go out on excursions to study the flora and fauna. They just brought back a strange plant that they believed could be medicinal. It was exciting, truly.
But Celci had been short with the discussion. She had her arms crossed the whole time, shutting down branching topics with quick retorts. You need rest, she’d scolded. She shoved a protein bar in your hand and sent you to your tent, with orders not to do any work tomorrow. When you tried to protest, she enacted a rule that stated she - as lead officer for medical - could confine you to your quarters if you were not at your peak health, physical or otherwise. You couldn’t argue with her, and so trudged like a pouting child toward the temporary camp of tents everyone was staying in.
That’s when you looked up. You stopped, staring at the unfamiliar stars, the strange moons that lacked craters. The Invincible could just be seen, hovering in the atmosphere. You were waiting for orders from Earth to know what to do with her. You refused to dismantle the grand spaceship. Most likely, it would continue to remain high above the planet, run by a skeleton crew. Forever up there. Alone.
That is when the realization overcame you.
It was slow. And then it all came crashing down over top of you like a tsunami. A growing sense of guilt filled your chest. Was that it? Guilt. No, maybe it was… loss. Yes. A powerful sense of grief within you, bubbling to the surface.
Maybe it had always been there. You couldn’t rightly tell. But it was powerful. It grew, bubbling like a thick paste within you until it reached your tear ducts and buckled your knees. The ground was warm beneath you, and the sky full of strange new stars blurred into a swirl of watercolors. Maybe this was how Van Gogh saw the world. Through tears.
“Captain?”
Your lip trembled. You couldn’t look at him.
A warm body knelt next to you on the ground. His dark eyes burned into your skin, searching desperately for answers. Why were you crying? Why were you sitting out in the middle of the camp, staring at the sky? When he glanced up, following your gaze, he caught sight of the Invincible. He mentally damned the ship.
Was it because of the ship that you were crying? Far too often to be healthy, he, too, stared up at the ship. He remembered the warp core. The mistakes he made, and the ones he caused.
He had no idea what you saw up there. You never spoke about it. Now he wished he had. He wished he asked. He wished he knew what worlds, what alternate realities, what different timelines you’d witnessed. Maybe then he could understand what was wrong.
“Cap…?”
Your eyes were red now. Your face crinkled with grief and sorrow, fighting back the onslaught of tears. You gasped in a shaky breath. Out came a whisper. He thought, perhaps, you would tell him about the things you’d seen. You witnessed thousands of deaths; he had, too. But that was not what came out of your mouth.
“I don’t remember my name.”
Mark was stunned. Shock and confusion overtook his body. Your name? Well, of course, your name was… It’s…
Confused and frustrated, he remembered the IDs on file for every single crew member. He sifted through so many every day, trying to keep track of who was who. It took a few taps on his wrist pad to pull up your ID. He skimmed it for himself before holding out his arm to show you.
The image was fairly recent, only from a few months ago. But you looked… brighter. Hopeful. Determined. Your hair was a little shorter then, too. The bags under your eyes from rigorous study weren’t as prominent as they were now. You looked like a hollow shell of who you once were.
And, yes, that was your name. Or… was it? Was it really your name after everything that had happened?
No. That was their name.
You shook your head and furiously wiped at the tears on your cheeks. Every crass name, criminal title, and disparaging nickname flooded your mind. No. They didn’t have those titles. They didn’t deserve the hatred and vitriol that followed you through that wormhole. They were not the Captain. And you were not them.
“That’s not my name anymore,” you croaked. You shook your head again. You looked like a child having a breakdown in kindergarten over a broken toy. “That’s- That’s not me anymore.”
Mark couldn’t say he really understood why. The image of you, all crooked grins and academy-fresh confidence, was you. He remembered you gushing to him over flying your first airplane, and going through the rigorous training of outer-space flying. He remembered because it was you who gave him the idea for all those stupid windows. When you gushed over being so close to the night sky you felt you could reach out and pluck Polaris right out of the inky black.
But when he looked from the picture to you? He was reminded of the hardships. How you jumped from universe to universe, wracking up casualties, just to save him. And he started to get it. You went through too much to be even near the same plane of existence as your young, naive self.
“Who am I, Mark?”
When you fell to press your face unceremoniously into his shoulder, he wasted no time wrapping you up in his arms. The ID flickered away as the screen turned off. He tried to hold on tight enough to physically stop you from shaking with your sobs, but it was impossible.
“You’re our Captain.”
Maybe it wasn’t the right thing to say. But they were the only words he could find.
Anybody who passed by pretended they didn’t see anything. He hoped, anyway. He couldn’t meet their eyes. All he could do was hold on, as you had done for him once. Your sobs turned into stifled cries, and then only whimpers. He wasn’t concerned at first. In fact, he was a little relieved you were beginning to calm down. Until you became completely limp in his hold.
Even then, he still paused a second, before pulling you back until he could see your face. Had your skin always been so dull?
He shook you slightly. Maybe you were just sleeping, right? Your eyelids didn’t even flutter. Panic shot through his heart.
He shook you again, harder this time. No response.
“Captain?” Another shake, perhaps a little more vigorously than he intended. Your body was a rag doll, flopped in his lap. “No, no, no, you can’t close your eyes right now!”
His mind, scared and jumping to all the worst conclusions, raced to figure out what to do. He laid you on the ground and pressed an ear against your chest.
……
Okay. There’s a heartbeat. A little weaker than he thought was normal, but it was there. And your chest was moving, albeit slowly, with each breath. He pulled away. His hands, calloused with years of fiddling with wires and heavy machinery, floundered in the air. He didn’t know what to do.
Desperate cries for help, for Cici, for anyone were ripped from his lungs. He was gasping for air by the time half the camp rushed out to see what the commotion was. He couldn’t catch his breath until you were safe again.
He just needed you to be safe.
-
Word spread about the Captain’s health quickly. Mark couldn’t say he was surprised. Actually, he was sort of embarrassed.
That night - almost a week ago now - Celci had rushed to his side. She was the rational and cool-headed one. She commanded medics to grab a stretcher, to ready an IV, prepare a bed and equipment. All the while he screeched like a banshee, whaling for his old friend.
Uncharacteristically, though, she didn’t say a word about it. Nobody did. (Or, at least, not when he was within earshot.) She grabbed him a chair, some water and snacks, even a blanket. And as he sat by the Captain’s side, a permanent frown etched within his features, she kept him up to date on your condition and on the colony.
He knew his fears were wholly rational. After jumping through wormholes and witnessing first hand what consequences it brought, it was only natural for him to fret over the permanence of life now.
How stupid he’d been. Really. How many times did he grab your hand and jump back into the wormhole? More than he could count on one hand. The way he would be torn apart by a black hole or exploded by a supernova, and still step out of that pod with a giddy little grin, asking, almost begging, the Captain to jump in again. And again. And again.
Vaguely he remembered an airlock.
Neither of you were immortal now. Honestly, he hated immortality. It seems to amazing in theory…
He drags a hand down his face with a sigh. His shoulders are hunched. He leans his elbows against the edge of your bed.
He’s tired. Not like before. This wasn’t an exhaustion fueled by some silly false heroics or nonstop building of a catalyst to all your issues. No. He was exhausted with worry, and fear, and- God, emotions he didn’t even have words for. It all sat heavy in his soul.
Guilt, he decided to call it. But different. Guilt if it was slightly to the left.
Celci told him you just passed out from exhaustion and overworking yourself. Maybe he felt guilty for not picking up on it sooner, or for stopping you before it got so bad. It’s not as if the bags under your eyes were invisible, or that the way you carelessly rushed in to help every single person in need was subtle. He should have noticed.
Maybe then you would remember your name. Or, he thought back to your ID, believe you’re still you.
He wished his mind could shut up, for once.
A distraction. That’s what he needed, yeah.
He dragged his eyes from your face to your monitor. He was never very good with medical stuff. The numbers were odd. Was that blood pressure normal? Too high? Too low? Hell if he knew. Was your heart beating fast enough?
He contemplated for a brief moment the components that went into a monitor like that. The wires, connectors, screws, bolts, etc. And then he remembered this machine was making sure you were still alive. The idea of dismantling it was no longer appealing.
He turned to the IV next. A slow, continuous drip of fluids, hooked up to your arm. Needles always gave him a bad feeling. He felt nauseous looking at it.
Strange flowers caught his attention next. There were no roses or tulips or irises out here. Just… Well, they didn’t have names yet. The exobiologists were working on formulating latin names, genuses, and everything else that came with cataloging different flora. They were still beautiful, he couldn’t deny it. Bright orange petals with neon blue stamens that glowed at night. Razor-leaved stems that started as purple by the bloom and morphed into an odd black hue. They looked poisonous, actually. He was sure they wouldn’t be allowed in here if that was the case.
Paper was becoming a luxury at this point. Not that it mattered much, with everything accessible at the press of a button on their wrists. Still, they thought it would be best to ration out the remaining scraps throughout the colony. And everyone, seemingly unanimously, decided to use the rare material to write get well soon cards.
The little folds of parchment filled every possible surface. With 100,003 people writing get well and thank you, at some point the excess of good will notes had to be tucked away in a bin to be read later. He caught a nurse, once, rotating out the cards.
His frown softened when he thought of the very human way in which they cared about you. How human to utilize a precious resource just to say Thank you, wake up soon. How human to see something beautiful in nature, and to display it tenderly next to you. We found something beautiful, it made us think of you. How very human for those who stopped by, who saw him ever at your side like a steadfast protector, rested a hand on his shoulder or patted him on the back. You are not alone in your pain.
He wished, desperately, that you could be awake to witness the love humanity so freely handed out. Maybe then you could rediscover who you were.
“You look like shit.”
Mark startled awake. When did he fall asleep? Ah, dammit, it was dark outside. He must have been out for hours. He scrubbed at the exhaustion crusting his eyelids shut.
Wait…
His body froze. He was too scared to breathe. His heart was racing.
He couldn’t have heard that. He couldn’t have.
Heart in his throat, he slowly removed his hand from his eye and dragged his eye along your frame, still tucked safely under the blanket. Sure enough, when he finally reached your face, there was a smug grin waiting for him.
And with a jolt, his body came back to life.
You watched, half-amused as Mark threw himself from his chair to press a Call Nurse button on the opposite side of your bed. His eyes were wide and frantic. His hair was a mess. Bags under his eyes carried the weight of the world, tears of relief slipping down his cheeks before he could even think to stop them.
“You’re- You’re awake!” he croaked. His hands instinctively grabbed onto your shoulders. They were trembling.
You tried to reach up to hold onto his shoulder, maybe even his face to feel his concerning amount of stubble, but it felt so heavy. You held onto his forearm instead. “How long-?”
Celci came storming in, looking about as frantic as Mark, but better put together. Once she saw you were conscious, her expression morphed to be somewhere between joy and fury. Uh oh.
“Captain!” The only freedom from her intense stare came when she checked your vitals. Mark backed away so she had plenty of room to do so, but he kept a hand on one of your shoulders. He couldn’t pull himself away just yet. “I’m not going to say ‘I told you so’, but I told you this was going to happen if you kept pushing yourself so hard!”
“What exactly happened?”
The cryonics lead faltered. Mark gave her a pleading look. She realized, for the first time since stepping in here, that he had been- no, was crying. She had never seen him cry before.
Celci sighed and tapped a few things into her wrist pad. “I’m assigning you to bedrest and low-effort work until you decide to put your needs before those of the colony.” She leveled you with a concerned stare. “The colony needs you, Captain. You can’t be everywhere at once, helping with every last fiber of your being, no matter how much you want to. Let the rest of us carry the responsibilities we were sent here to carry.”
Mark turned away to wipe away his tears before she could glare at him next and give him a lecture, too. She huffed, nodded to you with a Captain, and left.
The air was thick. Things unsaid hung around in the air like dust caught in a sunbeam - everywhere you look and hard to ignore.
Mark didn’t look at you as he tried to gather himself together. The motes would continue lingering until he was ready to answer your questions.
Deciding to give him some space (as much as you could while bedridden), you looked to the side. The hordes of cards was utterly overwhelming. Each one was different from the next. Some had Captain written on the front in neat cursive, heavy-handed scrawls, or chicken scratch. Some people did their ‘C’s differently, or slurred their writing together in their plain-text handwriting. Other cards simple said Get well soon! or Feel better! You could see small paragraphs of writing inside the folds.
A rush of warmth flooded your chest. All of the command leads, all of the colonists - everyone thought about you. Maybe the idea of being thought of was just so foreign, but you didn’t think in any earnest capacity that this many people would care. The Leads, sure, you spent so much time with them up on the ship (more than they realized), but the most contact the vast majority of the colonists had with you was the simple welcome you gave them as they were thawed. And yet. Despite it all. Everyone had left a card.
Everyone cared about you.
The warm feeling in your chest turned sour as you remembered your conversation with Mark last night. (Was it last night?) The way the stars glimmered back without a care for you. The way you squeezed that protein bar so tight it became mush in its package. The way Mark held you.
I don’t remember my name.
Who am I, Mark?
You squeezed his arm, as much as you could in your weakened state.
You’re our Captain.
Reddened eyes met yours. His eyes were so dark, but they held a thousand thoughts, emotions, and ideas behind them. You remembered looking into those eyes, as you held onto him, refused to let him go even as he called you hateful names and ripped the crystal from your palm.
“You’ve been asleep for a week.” He sniffed. His hand trembled as he gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Cici said… You were overworking yourself, pushing yourself past your limit just to be there for everybody, and you weren’t taking care of yourself like you should have been and she said-” He swallowed thickly, fighting to speak through the lump in his throat. “You could have died.”
Oh. It had been that bad? You couldn’t recall feeling weak. Though, maybe it was from the endless running you did during the warp core fiasco. How long had you been awake during that endless nightmare? Your body had recovered once the cycle was broken, but your mind…
“I’m sorry.” It was all you could say. His shoulders fell. “I didn’t…” Your voice was quiet, almost too soft to be a whisper. As if you were afraid to say what was on your mind. “When we were in the wormhole, I was so tired. We both were. But it’s like, I don’t even know what it’s like to feel tired anymore, because nothing compares to what happened.”
You looked up at him, like a child seeking approval. In your eyes, he saw universes colliding, supernovas, and someone who never gave up hope. For the briefest hint of a second, he saw that same determined graduate from the ID.
“Does that make sense?”
He nodded without thinking. His hand left your shoulder, following the length of your arm to hold your hand. You didn’t have gloves on. It was… odd. He ignored the calloused scar that brushed against his palm. “I feel the same. I remember building the… it. I didn’t sleep at all, then. And now that I can, it feels… wrong. I’m not tired, but I am. I can’t explain it better than that.”
“I think we both need a nap.”
He huffed. It was nice to see him smile again. “On your orders, Captain.” His grin flickered, eyes darkened. “If you’d like, you can choose a different name. It wouldn’t be too hard to change your ID.”
“No,” you said. You smiled. “You were right, all along.”
“About what?”
“I’m your Captain.”
---
Tag List:
@writeawaythepain
@hyperfixat
@cryptidjester
@your-voice-is-mellifluous
361 notes · View notes
starry-nightengale · 2 years
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Welp, it seems the ISWM brainrot has claimed another victim (namely, me). I’m especially fascinated by Captain Y/N ourselves and our apparently superhuman ability to make everyone in the galaxy simp over us (but no one more than our trusty Head Engineer, of course~).
With that in mind, uhhhh... Here’s a Scenario™, I guess? (Partially inspired by this headcanon(?) post.)
So... picture this:
Gunther, Celci, and Burt are discussing something that, for whatever reason, they don't want Mark to hear. So they pull the Captain aside and ask if Cap could keep him busy for them. Just for a little while.
Cap's like: "I've got somewhere I need to be in a minute, but... wait here, I'll try something."
The crewmates watch as the Captain wanders over and says a few words to Mark. They can't make out what Cap is saying exactly, but by the soft smile on Cap's face and the increasingly idiotic grin on Mark's, they can guess it's probably something sugary-sweet and complimentary.
As Cap talks, their hand goes up to the back of Mark's head and into his hair, sloooowly petting it. Mark's gaze is LOCKED on the Captain's, and his eyes even go a little glassy. He almost seems to stop breathing.
The Captain boops his nose and walks away.
Mark remains in place.
The whole exchange took about 45 seconds.
Cap returns to the group. "Alright, that should do you. By my estimate, Mark won't remember anything that happens within the next ten minutes or so."
Gunther: [removes his shades] "...Holy shit. You straight-up HYPNOTIZED him."
Celci: [shaking her head, smirking] "What an idiot."
Burt: "Captain, the power you wield is both impressive and terrifying to behold."
Cap: "I know. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a meeting to get to with Navigation." [salutes and leaves]
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The Captain: [sigh] “I could use some serotonin.”
Engineer!Mark: [starts to leave the room, but comes back] “...I didn’t remember what serotonin was for a second, so I was seriously just about to go and get you some.”
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rat-that-writes · 2 years
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cuddly affectionate hcs
a/n: what is up my crunky crew. i wanted a hug so i wrote this
tw: mention of horniness w/ illi, very very slight angst (mention of a fear w/ yancy), swearing + use of the word whore (not in a negative way)
🖤 Dark 🖤
this man acts like an actual housecat
he acts all uninterested about affection at first and probably teases you a little if you ask him for hugs
but as soon as you actually do hug or cuddle him? oh my god hes so touch starved he is not letting you go
he didn’t realise just how much he needed soft and romantic affection, it had been years
once he knows how much he actually likes hugs, he will just find you during the day and hold you
even if you’re busy, hes still gonna hold you
but only in private; he doesn’t like pda unless its hand holding or just a quick kiss
but as soon as you’re alone? it’s cuddle time babeyyyy
he likes resting his chin on your head or shoulders, especially with you in his lap
he will start subconsciously stroking your arms or waist if you’re laying down with him
he might purr…. if you get him relaxed enough
but be sure to never bring it up because he’ll try to conceal it next time
poor boy is embarrassed, bless him
💙 Damien 💙
he absolutely NEEDS cuddles when hes tired
you can easily get him to stop working and come to bed by just texting him “come cuddle?” he will be there in seconds
he loves to lay on you while you play with his hair
he will fall asleep in 5 minutes if you pet him honestly
is also like a huge cuddly house cat that constantly needs affection (Dark gets it from him)
he loves to hold hands
the size difference, the touch of your skin, just the image of your hand in his gives him butterflies
if your hands are ever remotely cold he is just !!! darling !! i must warm your hands up :))
he does like pda, but it’s best to keep things appropriate since he’s mayor and all
but he still can’t stop himself from holding your hand no matter who’s around
❤️ Actor ❤️
this man is so needyyyy
you often wake up with him half way on top of you fast asleep
he has cuddling stages during the night
usually you’ll go to sleep spooning or with your head on his chest
then if you wake up during the night he’ll be clinging to you like a koala (good luck trying to get up to pee if you need to)
and in the morning hes laying sideways over your torso like a beefy blanket
or hes just ,. on the floor. idk either man he just be like that sometimes
and if you can’t lift him up and put him back in bed, just join him on the floor
hell think its sososo endearing but is more concerned about your comfort
whenever you cuddle it will probably lead to making out
hes just so thirsty honestly
he loves spooning you and holding you tight
his favourite cuddle time is when he comes back from a day on set and you’re both sleepy and you fall asleep on the couch in each other’s arms
then benjamin wakes you and you both shuffle away to bed giggling
pda? oh baby! hes all about it
he does not care what anybody thinks he just wants kisses
but he will definitely adhere to your own boundaries
🤍 Yancy 🤍
you are this mans teddy bear
he hates sleeping without you now
if he’s on parole and you two live together/hes staying over, even if hes about to pass out on the floor he will not go to bed unless you do as well
hed rather fall asleep in an uncomfortable spot than get into bed alone
he holds you against his chest and kisses your head and neck so softly
he never holds you too tightly
he has a fear of accidentally hurting people, especially you, because hes so big and strong and rough but hes just a gentle giant once you get to know him
so he holds you so gently and sweetly as if you would break if he held on any tighter
pda he likes is kisses on the cheek and hand holding, not much more
he prefers keeping affection private, unless someone is trying to hit on you
he will literally just walk up to you and kiss you and smile at whoever was flirting with you
hes protective and doesn’t want someone taking you away from him
hell probably blush a little afterwards lol
💛 Illinois 💛
he makes a great pillow, honestly
his chest is comfy and warm and he puts his hand on your head if you sleep on him
is secretly a fan of sleeping with his head on your chest or stomach
he will never admit it but you have woken up to it multiple times
snuggling to keep warm on adventures is his favourite thing
hes pretty used to the cold, but if you’re not then he will gladly wrap you up in as many blankets as possible and hold you tight
he loves to fluster your and make you hide your face in his chest
he thinks it’s the cutest thing in the world
hes good with pda as long as you are
spooning often results in him getting hard oops
what can i say hes a horny guy
🚀 Engineer Mark 🚀
he needs cuddles so bad
hes stressed and works too hard and just needs some good love !!!!
he always peppers your face and neck and shoulders with kisses when you’re alone together
he wouldn’t mind a little pda but it’s all up to you really
he likes to let people know you’re together, with you being so strikingly beautiful and handsome and gorgeous
sometimes you have to remind him to keep it professional oops
“baby!! UM. I MEAN- CAPTAIN!”
“hey yn- AH, hey captain,”
“honey could you- CELCI GET OUT OF MY ROOM”
he doesn’t mean to be like that on purpose, he just loves you so muchhhh it makes him a little silly sometimes
🔪 Murdock 🔪
you would be surprised how much this man likes cuddling
cuddles and hugs make him feel like he’s protecting you and keeping you safe
he is secretly a little bit of a shy man with affection
he doesn’t do pda unless someone is flirting with you or making you uncomfortable
even then it’s just an arm around your shoulders or waist and a glare at whoever is speaking to you
in private he pretends he doesn’t need or even like affection, but when you do touch him he just melts immediately
he likes cuddling in bed facing each other, kissing softly every now and just being comfy and relaxed
he likes to shower with you; it’s not always sexual he just likes the vulnerability and warmth
he likes to go to sleep spooning you
he holds you pretty tight, not uncomfortably, but noticeably tight
you’re his teddy bear
🌌 God of Night 🌌
he ALWAYS wants you in his lap so he can kiss your neck and touch your thighs and waist
will show you off to the other gods every chance he gets and if there is no chance he will make one
expect cheek kisses every 4 seconds
if you’re a mortal, he would l o v e to spoil you and amaze you with all the wonders accessible to him
if you’re a higher being like him, he will constantly be ‘subtly’ showing off to you
(its not subtle AT ALL)
this bitch is the type to run up to you and spin you around and dip you down to kiss you in front of everyone
he is so smug too
hes like “everyone look at me. look at me and my SEXY ASS PARTNER. YEAH YOU WISH YOU WERE US. WE ARE SO HOT. FUCK YOU.”
is not afraid to stick his tongue in your mouth in public
an absolute whore honestly
he is all over you when you’re alone
just constant “darlingggg.. cuddle me…:(((“ he is silly
in conclusion: in public? mans is kissing you touching you showing you off and praising you. alone? DARLINGGG I NEED A HUG !!!!!
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simpofmanymen · 1 year
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Would you guys be interested in markiplier ego lore amv/lore edits? Like videos with music that also have the story/lore explained
Eg.
Just a random one might not be exactly what there like but a nice idea ya know
Ps. Does anyone got any tag tips? I’m not sure how to tag on tumbler I’m expecting it’s like TikTok and instagram
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themagical1sa · 1 year
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oh now, holding this pain just like on the day I left you alone
the pain grows more every day endlessly before me, like deja vu
hi. my name is Isa Capi and I refuse to sleep once again lol my brain is so weird for wanting to be depressed on a rainy November night like tonight. in the Philippines. it’s the perfect kind of night to get cozy and sleep. if I didn’t want to sleep, I would have rather worked on some college assignments, but my brain doesn’t want to work either! what the heck 🧍 well, since my brain doesn’t want to sleep nor work and I don’t want to be depressed, I am now making a compromise by making something my brain and I can agree on: writing a vent-comfort drabble. this has happened before with my first Tagalog-written drabble and it worked well as a distraction from Being Mentally Ill™ lmao without further ado, here is the drabble.
⏳ WRITING START : 11-17-2022 ⌛ WRITING END : 11-28-2022
#️⃣ WORD COUNT : roughly 2.1k words
🏷️ TAGS : post-ISWM, Captaineer (The Captain/Head Engineer Mark), angst to comfort, holy shit veeery angsty now that I think about it, the Captain is Tired, we have Impostor Syndrome and it's Horrible, I am once again reiterating angst to comfort
⚠️ CONTENT WARNINGS AND HEADS-UP :
dabbles into what having a horrible and intrusive mental state feels like with impostor syndrome.
colored text (particularly colored red and blue) has been utilized for a visually immersive reading experience.
reader discretion is advised. in other words: read at your own risk.
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“Good work today, everyone. You are all dismissed.”
You watch as everyone leaves the conference room, satisfied smile still enduring on your face. Once the last of the head officers and their assistants have left, you finally let yourself collapse slowly to the floor, barely leaning on the wall as you did so.
You’re tired.
You are so overwhelmingly tired — exhausted, even.
Then again, who wouldn’t be, after jumping through countless of lifetimes and endangering countless lives?
Who wouldn’t be beyond exhausted carrying unfathomable guilt while leading the first human colony outside of your own solar system and galaxy?
Good God, you didn’t think it would come to this.
You didn’t even think you’d even be here at all.
You curl into a ball from your previous sitting position, hugging your knees to yourself as you close your eyes.
How did you get here?
A lot of thoughts zoom by your mind as you sit there in the conference room, alone beside the door while contemplating your life decisions.
You were given this role of Captain because the world’s authorities thought of you worthy, but were they right to trust you with the Invincible?
Do they know about how much you had managed to screw up the multiverse?
How did you even get here?
Did you even deserve to be here?
You couldn’t trust your own mind at this point. Intrusive thoughts become louder by the second, making you hold your head as you shake it. “No, no, shut up,” you whisper to yourself. “I deserve to be here. I worked so hard and so well that I was entrusted here. They saw me fit. I deserve to be here.”
You reassure yourself, but your attempts feel futile as the intrusive voices in your head speak ever louder and more erratically. No, you don’t, they retort. You just faked your way into becoming Captain like the impostor you are. You’re a fail YOU FAILED!– failure and you’re undeserving of being Captain. WHO ARE YOU, REALLY? They should have put you down when they had the chance. You shouldn’t be here– who are you to be here?
You’re very aware of how it’s becoming worse — you should be having this breakdown in your room, in your personal space. You want to berate yourself for not having left the conference room earlier, but you decide against it as you try to get up, leaning on the wall for support before moving forward to the long table in the room. Your mental state has worsened your breathing, your once normal rhythm now quickened into panicked breaths. You try to take a deep breath before turning to the door–
“Captain?”
–where you see your Head Engineer, looking at you with worry clearly showing on his face.
“Mark,” You try to smile, but you’re self-aware of how it isn’t quite hiding your pain. “I was just about to leave. Did you forget something?”
Mark blinks as he looks around the empty conference room before worriedly looking back at you. “No, I– I was looking for you, Cap. Are you okay? How long have you been here?”
You softly (and yet, bitterly) chuckle at Mark’s response about finding you. You shake your head slowly as you say, “I’m fine, Mark. I haven’t been here too long. I was just about to leave.”
You mentally pick yourself up — it feels like carrying more than one dead body for you, and this is just you picking yourself up — and you try to make it seem like you’re not slowly staggering as you exit the conference room, but then you hear Mark say,
“I remember, Captain.”
You stop just at the doorway.
“…what do you mean you remember, Mark?”
You are now turned to him, seeing his face darken with trauma and regret.
“Everything,” Mark answers, his voice deep with remorse. “I– I remember how we kept jumping into universe from universe, and I– God, I thought it was you, but I– it was all me, Cap. It was me–”
“No,” you sternly interrupt him despite your current mental state. “It wasn’t just you. You may have built the Warp Core, but I was the one making rash decisions. I was the one who put everyone in the multiverse at risk. I put everyone on the line and I was the one who hurt everyone, including you.”
Mark is baffled with the way you’re owning up to what happened. “But you–”
“But I’m nothing!” You suddenly burst out, unable to stop the tears beginning to flow and stream down your face.
This takes Mark back, baffled and shocked as you unravel in front of him.
“I was the one entrusted with the lives of every single person on this ship,” You continue, “and that’s including you! Do you know how that feels, carrying that responsibility?! I was supposed to keep everyone safe, and I was supposed to make sure we all get through the journey unharmed, but I– but I–!”
You stop. You realize you’re unraveling.
You realize that you’re unraveling in front of your Head Engineer.
You realize that you’re unraveling in front of the only other person who knows about what happened.
He didn’t deserve to see you like this, not when you’re the same person who continuously looked for him; not when you were the one who persevered through lifetime to lifetime, hopeful that you could stop him from repeating his same mistake that destroyed the multiverse and trapped it into a destructive loop.
He didn’t deserve to see you like this.
He didn’t deserve to see you like this at all.
In fact, he shouldn't have to see you, his Captain, unraveling so messily like this.
You scoff; and then, you let out a bitter laugh.
“Ha… haha…” Your voice resounded, broken and unsure as your eyes darkened with your bitter smile. “I’m… I apologize for my outburst. That was… that was really unbecoming of me. I should go now.”
You turn to finally leave, but you feel a hand hold yours, halting your departure once more.
“Don’t…” Mark begins, trailing off. “Don’t go yet.”
You don’t move. You don’t even turn to look at him when you say, “Let me go.”
“No.” Your Head Engineer deadpanned, voice solid and stern. “I’m not letting you go.”
You turn your head a little, as if leaning to look. You don’t, however, as you refuse to see him.
“Let me go, Mark.”
“No. I’m here, Captain. I’m here, holding on to you, and I’m not letting you go.”
You suddenly remember when you held him back from the wormhole.
He was begging you to let him go, to let him fix what he thought was your mistake — but you knew how it was all him, and that even his older self knew he needed you to stop him. You spent lifetime after lifetime letting him slip through your hands until you finally, finally got ahold of him and never let him go.
It seems the tables have turned.
“Why…?” You weakly ask, voice barely above a whisper. “You know. You know how I put everyone in the multiverse at stake. I put everyone at stake and I treated it like a game. I was horrible for that and you know it.”
Mark could only shake his head, beyond baffled at what he was hearing from you. “What?! Captain, no! I don’t think of you that way, not anymore. Nobody thinks of you that way–”
“Well, I do!” You finally admit, turning so quickly to him that you feel a little dizzy. “I finally realize why you and Lady resented me so much, and– God, I didn’t see it, but I killed so many people– so many dead, and it was all because I thought we were just starting over!”
At this point, you’re sure you look much like a mess. Your hair is unruly from the way you held your head earlier, and your eyes are flowing with tears — tears that have long stained your cheeks and flowed until they drop to the floor. Snot is beginning to run down your nose. You’re sure you’re far from pretty and/or handsome.
You’re far from pretty and/or handsome.
Even so, Mark can’t help but love you more anyway.
“I thought…” You speak again, catching his attention once again. “I thought that… I thought if I find you, if I find you and hold on… I thought it would stop. And I was right– older you was right, even– and we restored the multiverse.”
Your eyes drop to the floor, closing them as you remember all those bodies — all those corpses — that came out of the wormhole for every time you died and/or jumped into another universe.
All those corpses.
All those lives.
All those people– dead because of you.
“We restored the multiverse, Mark,” you state to him, but your voice has become more broken as you hold back a sob before looking at him in the eyes.
“We restored it, Mark, but what did it cost? What did my foolishness cost?”
You couldn’t stand anymore — not when you’re already falling apart. You had half the mind to lean onto the wall before sliding down to the floor again. You don’t care about appearances anymore; it’s just you and your Head Engineer, anyway. You try to take deep breaths as haunted memories flash in your mind. You close your eyes and put your gloved hands over them as an attempt to stop seeing such flashbacks, but you can still see it all like a waking nightmare.
The fact that you can still remember almost clearly makes you whimper.
You don't feel it at first, but Mark had crouched to level with you, hands reaching to your shoulders. Before you know it, you find yourself in your Head Engineer's arms, wrapped in his warm embrace.
Mark hugging you feels very comforting — grounding, even. The voices in your head begin to die down, and the intrusive nightmarish distortion of your memories start to fade as your mind relaxes. Your breathing slows, and you find yourself leaning more to your Head Engineer as he carefully cradles and comforts you.
His voice is soft when he speaks.
“You know, Captain,” he begins somberly, “I'm really glad you held on to me.”
What he said makes you look at him with your tired, cried-out eyes.
“...what makes you say that?”
Mark sighs as he gently strokes your hair, closing his eyes as he thinks back to the loop. “Well, I was just making the same mistake after all,” he reasons out. “I remember catching wind of that.”
You remember when his older self realized it back in the diner, telling you that you had to stop his younger self. “Oh... you remember that, don't you?”
He chuckles bittersweetly. “Yeah, somewhat...”
You chuckle with him, subconsciously glad that you can recall the events of the wormhole without your mind twisting it maliciously.
“I kind of remember when I hoped that you'd stop me,” he admits, voice soft as he recalls the time. “I don't think I was consciously hoping, though... but that Warp Crystal always found you, didn't it?”
What he just said makes you think.
For every loop reset, you come back to a sabotaged ship. You recall when you do reach the door to the Warp Core Chamber and how the Warp Core was looking for a suitable host and how it always said suitable host located when it scans you.
“With that said, Captain,” Mark begins, taking you out of your reverie. “You're not as horrible as you think. In fact, I believe you really are the best of us, because you never gave up on your crew — you never gave up on me.”
Your Head Engineer gently takes your face by the chin, making you look him in the eyes as you sniff. Your eyes are red and puffy from crying, cheeks stained with all the tears that have been flowing. You're evidently vulnerable, and Mark takes it upon himself to take care of you for the time being.
“You never gave up on us, so don't give up on yourself, Cap,” he softly states, “because I believe in you just as much as you believed in me.”
You feel your heart ache and you cry even more — but now you gratefully smile.
“Mark, thank you,” you say, voice weak and cracked. “Really, thank you.”
He reflects your smile sincerely as he chuckles. “I should be thanking you, Captain. But yeah... you're welcome.”
The both of you stay there, cuddled up together on the floor as you steady yourself and your breaths. You lean onto your Head Engineer's shoulder as he cradles you, hugging you and holding your head. Your intrusive thoughts have all died down now, and all that's left in your headspace is a sense of comfort and contentment. You finally feel at peace with yourself.
Whatever had happened is all in the past now, and you've never been more glad that you experienced it all with him.
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P.S. I really meant to utilize the colored text more specially to simulate the Captain's headspace post-ISWM. I like to think that post-ISWM, they build their new colony, they start having doubts about themself, which slowly and eventually leads to nightmarish distortions of their memories. It then develops into a horrible state of mind — hence the red and blue. You can say they're like… glitches. Errors, if you will. Oh, and you know how, in a distant place in the multiverse, we are part of an amalgamated being that glitches red and blue? How their red is often passionate rage, and their blue is often a calculated calm? Yeah.
Anyway, writing this helped me feel better, even if for a little bit. I've been feeling horrible about myself lately (hence this entire fic lmao) so it's nice to let it out somehow. This was cathartic. Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed reading this.
The divider used in this is a cropped photo of steil egil liland's Blac Blue and Green.
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cheeryraccoon · 2 years
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Wholesome Ego Headcannons
Hey look! I'm not dead! Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I'm back at school and have been pretty busy. Anyway, I hope you enjoy these headcannons! -------------------------------------------------------
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Mark -
• I see this man being very cuddley. At home if he's not working, he'll just cuddle up to you on the couch. Or if you're busy at your desk he'll just slip his arms around you and hug you. When you're out in public he'll usually just be holding your hand.
• He asked for your opinion on what color he should dye his hair every time he did so.
• Loves to bring you snacks if/when you stream.
• His favorite picture of you is of you and Chica laying in the grass on a sunny day (it's his phone's wallpaper).
• When either of you go on long trips he FaceTimes you to talk about both of your days.
Dark -
• You and Wilford are besties and will often try to get Dark to do something fun with you (sometimes it starts to become Wilford third wheeling but he doesn't mind).
• He uses rose petal cologne... I do not take criticism.
• He teases you sometimes just so he can see you flustered.
• He loves when you hang out in his office when he's working to keep him company.
• He will never admit it but he likes watching cheesy romance movies with you.
Wilford -
• If you ever get mad at him he'll leave and come back with food and puppy eyes.
• He'll randomly take your hand and slow dance with you in the living room.
• He loves nuzzling your noses.
• He loves to buy you clothes and when he sees you wear them he gets excited.
• Sometimes when he is reminded of Damien, Celine, and Actor, he has panic attacks. He'll lock himself in his room and curl up in the corner on the floor, sobbing. When this happens you knock a small jingle (to let him know it's you and he can let you in when he's ready) on the door and sit outside to wait. When he lets you in you'll hug him, tell him that everything is okay and that it wasn't his fault, and give him kisses to make him feel better. He doesn't know what he would do if he didn't have you at those times.
Yancy -
• In prison there's not much you can do for dates... but since you're with the man who knows every nook and cranny of the place he figures things out. At night he'll sneak you outside to stargaze and he can scare all the other prisoners out of the cafeteria at meal time and get the chefs to make you a nice dinner, he'll make sure you can be as happy with him as possible.
• If you share a cell he'll cuddle you when you're cold... or just because.
• He brags about you to everyone else, that includes the guards and the warden.
• He loves pet names, his favorite ones for you being 'buttercup' and 'doll'
• If he's ever insecure about his accent, you reassure him that you love it and that it's amazing the way it is. He appreciates you a lot for that.
Illinois -
• After a long day of adventuring, he loves relaxing with you in his arms as he reads a good book.
• When you steal his hat, or he puts it on your head, he takes a second to stare and take it how much he really loves you.
• If he ever finds out you had a crush on Indiana Jones at some point he'll implode... aka he'll get really flustered and probably get you in a bear hug the next time he sees you.
• This man loves plushies and you can't prove me wrong. If you give him a plush he will have it sitting on his bed and sometimes cuddle it when he goes to sleep. (+10 points if you spray it with your perfume)
• He likes to call you 'peach'.
Engineer Mark -
• He's a puppy. If you give him head pats he will do anything and everything to get more. You called him a good boy once as a joke and he wouldn't stop talking about it for a month. (His newest nickname from you is 'puppy')
• He loves hugs and physical affection  and will constantly try to get hugs from you all the time.
• Celci doesn't understand why you want to date him but will admit that you look cute together.
• Whenever you need him to show you how to do something he'll place his hands on top of yours to show you. He doesn't really think about it but, once he sees you blushing a little, he'll blush and get all smiley.
• If you ever get hurt on the ship, even if its just a tiny paper cut, he'll panic and rush you to the medical room to make sure you're okay.
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creat0r-cat · 1 year
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Iplier Egos x Reader HCs - Pregnancy HCs
Warning: LONG
Darkiplier
Well received
He’s happy to hear that you’re pregnant
Heck, he’s elated (but he won’t show it in front of the other egos cause edgy boss ego gotta keep his image)
More than willing to provide you with everything you need during your nine months
He can give you anything ;)
Isn’t really bothered by weird stuff like your cravings or increased/decrease in affection
Wilford throws you two a gender reveal party during your 5th month (Dark isn’t really one for parties but goes along with it for you)
You two are having a girl!
Dark starts to read books about how to keep boys away from his little girl (for the future)
Occasionally, if you two are cuddling, he’ll place his hands on your swollen belly and smile while nuzzling you lovingly
Is with you throughout the entire pregnancy (or as much as he can be)
Will hold your hand and whisper words of encouragement during labor
“It’s okay, darling. It’s almost over.”
“You said that three hours ago!”
“... I’m trying to help you.”
After an exhausting 16 hours of labor, you’re finally finished and the wails of a baby can be heard throughout the room
He’ll deny it, but Dark shed a few tears while holding his newborn daughter
Her name, decided by the both of you, was Celine Iplier
Wilford
WHAATTTTTTT
REALLY????
Happy mans
Jumping for joy and running around telling everyone he can find that he’s gonna be a dad
You find it adorable
Lots of kisses :3
He doesn’t mind your cravings and 9 out of 10 times he will try any weird concoctions you come up with
Is very impatient when it comes to finding out the sex of the baby
The egos make him wait an entire extra month to find out 
Bing and Google work together to throw the gender reveal party
Bing comes up with the idea to make him wait even more by making the inside of the cake blue and pink, the reveal balloons white, and more stuff like that
Wilford looks like he’s going to explode into glitter
Suddenly, Eric nervously comes forward wearing a pink Hawaiian shirt
“C-cong-gratulations.. I-it’s-s a g-girl.”
Chaos ensues
Key word: excitement
Likes to talk about dancing with his little girl when she’s old enough
It brings a smile to your face whenever he has these sweet lil’ gushes of happiness
He was doing an interview when you went into labor
Dr. Iplier began helping you through your labor pains and instructs Google to contact Wilford
Your husband teleports into the room in a panic
“Don’t worry, honey, I’ve gotcha!”
He happily holds his daughter, Willow Warfstache, in his arms quite a few hours afterward
“Wilford? Are you crying?”
“No, I’ve just got something in my eyes.”
“Oh yeah, like what?”
“TEARS!”
Actor
He just stares at you
“What did you just say?”
You repeat the news and he blinks, processing the information
“P-pregnant? Like, we’re going to have a kid?”
You confirm his question, now feeling very nervous
He is looking everywhere but at you, not being able to speak properly
“Y-you.. I.. we.. w-what..” 
With a sigh, he turns away and starts to leave
You call after him but he tells you he needs time to think
He doesn’t come to speak to you for a few hours
You’re in the living room of the mansion, a fire crackling in the fireplace while you read a book, trying to take your mind off of things
He walks in and sees you there and, after taking a deep breath, he goes to talk to you
“(Y/n).. darling.” 
“I’ve made up my mind, Mark, and I'm telling you now. I’m keeping this baby, whether you want them or not. I don’t care if you won’t want me around, but-”
He sits next to you, kissing you gently on the cheek and you turn to look at him
“That’s the thing, my dear. We’re going to be a family. I’m going to be with you every step of the way. I love you, and I’m going to take care of you and our baby.”
He meant it
He honestly did a pretty good job of it too
Sure he had a few things to gripe about, but he kept his word
You two don’t have a gender reveal party and instead keep to yourselves (for the time being)
Surprise! You’re having a little boy!
Has doctors come to the mansion when you go into labor
He’s starting to tear up and he’s more than happy to hold his son for the first time
“I never thought I could be so happy..”
Five years later, Actor is in a meeting with the other egos when there is a knock at the door
Google goes to answer when it suddenly opens and a little boy runs into the room
“Daddy! Daddy!”
Actor is shocked as (Y/n) quickly comes into the room, looking embarrassed
“S-sorry, we were going to surprise you when the meeting was over. David Iplier, I told you to stay in the hallway.”
Actor ruffles the boy’s hair, “It’s okay. I was definitely surprised.”
Just then they realized how silent the room was until Wilford let out a loud, “YOU HAVE A KID?!”
“Yes I do.” confirmed your husband, getting up and walking to the exit, “The meeting was basically over anyway so I’ll be taking my leave. Buh-bye!”
He took you and your son by the hand and departed, leaving behind a conference room full of shocked and confused looking egos
Dr. Iplier
Is very surprised but takes it well
“You really are full of surprises, aren’t you, (Y/n)?”
Honestly, he’s very excited and tells a few people at the hospital he works at as well as a few other egos
Being a doctor, he knows just what to expect from the pregnancy and, while he can’t always be home to take care of you (he does have a job after all), he does try his best to do what he can
Constantly checking up on you to make sure you feel okay
He’s the one to do the ultrasound on you and you can see his eyes sparkle when he sees his child for the first time
During the fourth month (when you can slightly begin seeing what sex the child is), he happily tells you that you’re having a boy
When one of the egos (probably Wilford but who knows) asks if they know yet, he’ll tell that ego about his son with a smile
Surprise, not surprise, he’s actually the one to deliver his own child
He was at work when an ambulance rushed in with you on a stretcher, obviously in labor
His eyes go wide and he runs to your side, grabbing your hand and giving you a quick kiss on the forehead
“It’ll be okay, (Y/n). Just breathe and get ready to push.”
The labor lasted around ten hours but it was worth it
Dr. Iplier was the first to hold his little boy and he was so incredibly happy
“He’s perfect, (Y/n).. thank you..”
“What do you think his name should be?”
“How about.. Liam? Liam Ipier.”
Google
Very surprised and confused
He wasn’t aware that he could get you pregnant
Yes, he knew he was very much like a human, but not THAT much
He does realize that the timing checks out though and knows that you wouldn’t lie to him about something so important
He’s happy and is sure to tell you that
He is also happy to do what you ask in order to make the pregnancy easier for you
Primary objectives are: 
- 1) To answer questions as quickly as possible 
- 2) To take care of his wife and future child
- 3) To destroy mankind (he has determined that this objective needs to be put on hold and possibly terminated though that last part’s still up for debate)
Will go with you to every doctor’s appointment and makes sure you feel okay
There are some very difficult parts of the three trimesters specifically when the baby is developing their more human-like parts
These complications were very much obvious during the third ultrasound
“It seems,” said Dr. Iplier in confusion, “that your child has some metal growing on her skin. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen before.”
Yup! You and Google are going to be the proud parents of a little cyborg girl
By the way, Google is now 100% sure that the child is his because of this discovery
However, due to the fact that your daughter is part metal, it was pre-determined that she would have to be taken out via a c-section rather than a natural birth
It was just safer that way
When the time came and you went into labor, after a few minutes of waiting in the operating room, some surgeons came and introduced to the world a beautiful baby girl
Google smiled as he held his daughter in his arms for the first time and you watched his reaction from your bed with a smile
She was very small and had small plates of metal that were visible on both of her cheeks and on her upper arms
“Hey Google?”
*ping*
“How does the name ‘Eve’ sound for your daughter”
“I think it’s perfect, my dear.”
Bing
I doubt the baby was planned but he’s happy to be a father anyway
Secretly he’s wondering if he’s actually able to get you pregnant but whatever he has a feeling the kid is his…. somehow..?
Tries his best to provide for you when you need things but probably ends up needing help from the other egos for a few things
Tries to act more mature at the doctor’s office when you go for checkups and ultrasounds
He likes to cuddle you and especially kiss your stomach
“Just givin’ the baby some love. Can’t have them feeling left out.”
Like in Google’s HC, there are some complications and you two find out that the kid is a cyborg
Bing’s happy when you two discover as well that you’re having a little boy
“We can name him Bing Jr. and I can teach him how to skateboard!” He told you excitedly
You secretly doubt you’ll end up calling your son Bing Jr. but decide to let your husband dream before a final decision is made
Well the decision comes faster than you two originally thought because you went into labor three weeks early
Your son is born via a c-section prematurely and while he is put in an incubation chamber in your hospital room, you and Bing are very worried but believe that he’ll be alright
“Hang in there little buddy.” Bing says softly, putting his hand up to the clear wall that contained his son
As he said that, the little boy opened his eyes and began to softly cry
The doctor informed the two of you that he would have asthma, as his lungs weren’t completely developed when he was born, but that he had a very good chance of survival
When you all were finally able to leave about a month later, Bing was the one to come out of the hospital with little Bing Jr. in his arms
Yancy
PANIC
“Y-youse is pregnant?? Oh gosh, what will I tell Mr. Murderslaughter?” 
He’s starting to hyperventilate and you hold him tight, calming him down after a few minutes
Yancy knew that he had already gotten special permission in the past to get married to you, his now wife, outside of the prison and in a Church, but this would probably not fly
Don’t get him wrong, as he tells you, he wants the kid
He really wants the kid (he had secretly wanted to be a father for a long time), but he’s worried about how the other prisoners and especially Mr. Murderslaugter would think if they found out
You assure him that everything will be alright and you both nervously go to the warden’s office and tell him the big news
There was a large moment of silence before he orders you both into separate solitary confinement cells
You both spend around 24 hours there before you’re both ordered back to the warden’s office
Mr. Muderslaughter tells you that, while he is a bit upset that you and Yancy did that, realizes that this will be a learning experience for all of them should this happen again, whether it be through you or someone else
So, soon everyone knows the big news and everyone is actually willing to help out
A surprising amount of the other prisoners are fans of babies
Unfortunately, prison food couldn’t quell all of your cravings but you put up with it
Yancy, who was happy to hear all of the encouragement from his fellow inmates, was happy to help you around as your belly grew
He was certainly fascinated when the baby started kicking
“I think they're gonna be either a fighter or a dancer. What’da think, sweetheart?”
Surprisingly enough, your child went over their due date by three days before you went into labor
It was a long and painful twelve hours before your son was born
Yancy couldn’t hold back tears as he held the little boy who slept quietly in his arms
“He’s… so handsome.”
You giggled tiredly, “Yup, just like his father.”
Yancy smiled at you before his looked at his son again
“(Y/n)? Could we maybe name him Clifton?”
“May I ask why? I’m not saying no, m’just curious.”
“It.. Clifton was my dad’s name. I think it suits the lil’ guy.”
You couldn’t help but smile and as you looked at the sleeping child, you realized that he was right
“Clifton.. Yeah I like that name too.”
Illinois
He has very conflicting thoughts on the matter
Yes, he’s happy he’s going to be a dad, but that means he would have to temporarily (if not permanently) give up treasure hunting
“Darling, will this affect how I do my work? I mean, I can’t exactly go exploring with a baby.”
“That’s what you’re worried about?” 
You’re a little hurt that his mind is elsewhere in regards to your big news, but honestly you should’ve seen it coming
Illinois looks sad, “With you being pregnant, I can’t just take you with me because something could happen to you and thus the baby.”
You frown sadly but then discuss a compromise with him
He can go treasure hunting by himself until you’re either five or six months pregnant then he has to come home (to LA where the two of you bought a house for when you’re not adventuring) and stay there until I’m well enough to take care of our kid on our own
He was hesitant at first but then took the deal
So yeah, he was gone for the first six months of your pregnancy, but he did make sure to call to make sure that you were okay
You told him unfortunately that you personally might have to retire from treasure hunting to be a stay-at-home mom and while he looked kinda sad about it, agreed that it was a logical decision
On a happier note, you told him that you found out that you two were going to have a daughter
He’s honestly very excited about that (he never knew he could be so happy about something like that)
When he comes back home, he’s pleasantly surprised by the sight of his VERY pregnant wife fast asleep on the living room couch
He can’t help but smile as he goes and gently wakes you up with a soft kiss
He keeps his word and stays with you for the next three months and is there with you when you go into labor
It was a tough 16 hours before your little girl was born and Illinois found himself on the verge of tears as he held his daughter
“She’s so beautiful..”
“So, what do you think her name should be?”
Illinois thought about it for a minute before responding
“Crystal. We met because of one, and now we’re closer because of one.”
You couldn’t help but smile as he passed the little girl to you and you kissed her softly on the forehead
“I like the sound of that.”
Engineer
PANIC
His mind is racing as he stares at you in shock
“I got the Captain pregnant I got the Captain pregnant I got the Captain pregnant”
Yes, he knows the two of you are married, there’s no issue with that, but YOU’RE PREGNANT???
“C-captain.. I-I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll help me raise this kid. They’re yours too.”
“Y-yup! That works!”
It was quite the surprise when it was announced six months later for everyone to hear
You and Mark had been on the low, you personally doing a lot of work at the home you and Mark shared on the colonization planet in order to not stress yourself out
However, someone (Gunther) found out when he came over for a surprise visit to see Mark and ended up seeing you working from a laptop
Gunther was about to say high when the then noticed the casual clothes that clothed your swollen belly
Yeah, Mark told him to not say anything as you two were trying not to make a big deal over it, but he ended up telling everyone
A doctor from the Invincible II had been checking up on you for the past few months and told you both earlier on that you would be having a little boy
When you finally went into labor, a c-section had to be done because the umbilical cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck
Mark was very frightened when he found out but you reassured him that it would be okay, as the doctors knew what they were doing
When you two were presented with your new child, Mark started crying happy tears and he hugged you who held your little boy
“I can’t believe I got so lucky.. To have such a beautiful family..” He whimpered as you kissed away his tears
“Do you want to hold him?”
He did and when he held his son, Daniel Iplier, he smiled shakily and kissed the baby on the forehead
“I love you two… so much..”
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softladyhours · 2 years
Note
the egos reactions to me giving them origami hearts
dark: *windows startup noise* 😳 darling 😳 a heart 😳
damien: 😳 … for me??? uwu??
actor: oh my DARLING 😍 *squeeze*
illinois: aww.. baby… this… babyyyy 🥺🥺
yancy: *smallest gasp ever* b a b y 🥲
engineer mark: aww honey 🥺🥺🥰 hey cELCIIII LOOK WHAT I GOTTT
god of night: *stares for 8 minutes* i would end the world for you
*pretends like I haven’t had this in my inbox for ages bc I’m literally so forgetful oml😅*
Dark would get so staticky about it!!!!!!!!! His brain would reboot completely and he’d be glitching ALL OVER the place, even tho it’s very obvious he’s trying (and failing) to play it cool!!!!!!!!!!
Damien would be similar to Dark, but instead of being borderline panicky about it, he’d go into babygirl mode and be absolutely breathless KSKKRKDKSK HE WOULD BLUSH SO BAD OK
Illi would be SPEECHLESS for sure just bc you’d be his first serious relationship in YEARS (possibly even ever) and he’s just never had anyone do anything so small and tender for him yknow? He’d immediately squish ur face in his hands and call you his treasure in between peppering ur face w kisses🥺🥺
YANCY MY DARLINGGG he would also shift into BABYGIRL MODEEEEE protect this man at all costs oml he is just so IN LOVE and when u give him an ORIGAMI HEART?????? THAT U MADE?????????? might pass out for a sec ngl (AND IF U GAVE IT TO HIM BEFORE YOU WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP??????? HED PROBABLY HYPERVENTILATE A BIT)
Engineer Mark would be ECSTATIC and definitely stimming a bit out of pure love and excitement🥰🥰 HE WOULD PIN IT TO HIS JUMPSUIT JUST SO HE CAN SHOW IT OFF LIKE A TROPHY and use it to brag about how amazing u are🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
God of night has literally been around for MILLENNIA and somehow has never even witnessed such a tender little act of love. Secretly, he’d be so confused about it at first just bc he’d be one that’s so used to huge, GRAND gestures of love. But when it sinks in??? He’d be OBSESSED w the things. He would, in fact, raze every countryside in a heartbeat for you KSJDKDKDKSJS
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