#eddie had his breakdown and bobby and buck are the only people who even really acknowledge it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bidisasterevankinard · 2 months

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Buck breakdown meta(+ a little bit of divorce 2.0 era)

“Did you know you were clinically dead for three minutes?” - “Bobby” from Buck’s coma dream or Buck’s part of the brain that always helps him to find the answers (6x11)

“Buck, you died” - Maddie(6x12), Bobby (6x14)

“You died, Buck” Eddie (6x12)

Before I started this meta I remembered these three (well, technically four but how you can see Maddie and Bobby said the same thing) times someone said in real words what happened with Buck, what exactly he experienced in his life, how he lost it. Because it wasn’t just “an accident on the job”(Buck 6x14), not even a near death experience Buck had in his life before(and not once), because Buck is indeed a good “friend” and “old acquaintance”(Buck 6x15) with death since he was born (as a donor to dying child) and not just “for a moment” how he believes. But I haven’t remembered Buck himself (not a coma Bobby), especially after he woke up and “started his healing” (the lyrics of the song right before we see Buck after hospital in 6x11) saying it. And I really thought aha, you sneaky boy, you haven’t really recovered as you never even said “I died”. But he actually said it once, but, to whom do you think he said it?

To his sister who raised him as a parent and said “Buck, you died”? No.

To his father figure who he knows was praying to God sitting in his room, thinking his another child is dying and he can’t AGAIN do something? To the man who was cradling him like a baby to put him on a gurney and wanted to take it easy on him in 6x14 because “Buck, you died”? No.

To his best friend, to whom he ran to hide from his sister’s fussing? To the man on whose couch he fell asleep seconds after sitting on it? To the man who tried hard to support him, how Buck supported him during his breakdown? No.

He said it to the woman he never met before (btw Natalia is cute and it’s not her bashing post. so DO NOT DO IT IN TAGS PLEASE), just a matter of factly, when helped her with her injury because he heard that she is “death doula”(but before it, he tries to say it in the other words)

But even to her he says it ONLY THIS ONE MOMENT. When they met again he spoke about his death experience in the pattern we saw before.

And this pattern is : “When i woke up,” “I woke up in a world” “I recovered” “accident on the job”, joking with Maddie, “it’s all a gift” or with Eddie not even himself in 6x12 talking about HIS death experience. With Eddie he asks about shooting, but Eddie makes it a conversation about “You died, Buck”.

Buck doesn’t like when people talk about death, showing him their grief, so he tries to talk about his new life. He jokes, or moves the conversation to the point of talking about his new life, new possibilities for him, about how he processes he is still here, but NOT HOW HE DIED. Buck refuses to process that he died. Yeah, it happened, he knows everyone grieved him, but he refuses to talk about how it changed him and others. He just wants to accept changes not to “act” like an “old same Buck”(Buck 6x15) for everyone, but to be a new Buck. And who is perfect to make him think about not his death, but about how many new experiences he can have, if not the person who is amazed by his death, who thinks it is “cool” he had the opportunity to experience it and get back, if not the person who never grieved him? Natalia wasn’t around to see him dead, she wasn’t the one who saved him. And Buck knows his family had to see him like that and act to save him, but he can’t think about it. He concentrates on good things, on being alive, on moving forward, to see “what’s next” for him. And he refuses to look and speak about what happened before it, to really move from it.

But I think we all remember how Maddie said that Buck is more than good at pretending that he is ok(4x4). Remember how in therapy he said “You said, I hide my true feelings from others. You might be right”, but then what happened? Oh yeah “new Buck 3.0” and him forgiving his parents for going to therapy with him. Because he hides it not just from others, but from himself too. Acting as Buck 1.0, 2.0, etc. Buck knows how to repress his feelings and move on to a new stage. How to act as a new Buck, not just for everyone, but for himself too. How to believe he is ok.

And he for years was mistaken or even hiding a lot of his feelings, so it’s not hard for him to play like he moved on. And on the way to make everyone, except one person who till the last moment (cemetery seen) tried to make Buck talk about his death. Who was the last person to say it to Buck, who used death, and died, in one conversation right to the point till Buck with his words “She sees me. like she really sees me for who I am and what I’ve been through. I think she might even see more in me than I see in myself” almost stopped him. He stops for a moment. Tries to play with Buck on his rules, tries to wait for Buck again how he did in 6x12, but tries one more time to make Buck talk about death.

“You cheated death”

But Buck speaks about life. About lightning. About his new life being a gift.

“My life could have ended right then and there,but it didn’t. That has to mean something, right?” (Buck looks at Eddie because even closing himself he still need Eddie)

“It means you are one lucky guy”(Eddie does’t not look at him)

“Yeah, well, I don't think I’m gonna get that lucky again.”

“We, maybe you don’t have to. Lightning doesn’t strike twice at the same place.”

“Which is why I have to make the most of every single moment. Because from here right now out it's all a gift”

And after that, Eddie, who thought he could give Buck the same “shoulder to cry on” and “sit with you” while you experience bad moments, stopped doing it. He looked at Buck and saw the man he saw, the man he thinks doesn’t need his help. Because Buck doesn’t look affected as Eddie expected him to be. Buck overplayed Eddie with his tires to prove he is ok. Eddie believed him. But also he heard that he is not that Buck needs to feel ok. He needs not that Eddie expected he would need (talks about his death and Eddie’s help), but someone else living with Buck his life and Eddie understood that Buck doesn’t need him at all.Not in the way he needed the man a year ago, crushing his room. And the feeling of loneliness he started to experience while he gave Buck time to come to him, before Buck pushed him away when he wasn't ready in the cemetery, just became all consuming. Because now Eddie believes Buck never needed him, how Eddie needs him. But the thing is, Buck needs him. He just pushed Eddie from him, because he feels that it’s dangerous to look at his death, because he doesn't want to be a burden, because he doesn't want to run in a circle of “someone loves me when I’m in pain” he did all his childhood. He doesn't want to experience love when he is broken, so he closes his death deep inside him, in a box. But we know how boxes explode if it’s too many things inside.

And let’s think that Buck has in his box: childhood of neglect, truck bombing, tsunami and embolism, well and shooting, ambulance hostage situation, Bobby shot, Maddie almost killed by Doug, the secret about Daniel being revealed, and then his real death. All it packed neat inside him, never spoken about. And after shooting we never heard him talking about therapy again. So Buck acts as a “new Buck” ALL THE TIME. Buck 1.0, 2.0, 3.0 it’s a proof. And he is just ready to be another “new Buck”, but others don't, because to see the new Buck they should fully grieve the old Buck. But Buck doesn’t want them to grief, he wants to joke and move on and that’s why he is feeling like he should stay “same old Buck”, act the same, but IT’S A PROBLEM. Because old Buck can’t help to mask the pain and fear from the death he experienced. Old Buck never looked at his life as a “gift”. This old Buck can’t help Buck to hide under this mask of everything being fine. And let’s nor forget how old Buck tried hard to find HAPPINESS. OLD BUCK WASN’T HAPPY. But the new Buck should be. He is still alive. His life has ended yet. But has he found his answer for happiness after death when Lev did it? No.

Buck's answer for happiness wasn’t shown, which means he tries to be happy, but he still doesn’t know HOW. And on the way he pushed his best friend from him, starting their as we call it in a fandom “divorce era 2.0”. Because it is what Buck does when he feels trapped (lawsuit waves at us). When Buck thinks he needs other things, not that others try him to do, speak about, heal properly before move on, not just “rush with his head first”, he pushes everyone from himself (yes yes boy with abandonment issue does it, but it is easier this way). In the lawsuit it was easier to blame Bobby, right now he ofc doesn’t blame Eddie, but he also doesn’t want Eddie to constantly talk about his death. So he pushed Eddie from himself.

So Buck can’t hide behind old, and new Buck is not something his family is ready to see, and it’s still an act. Buck is on the edge of breaking, and I’m sure in 7s it will happen. After Bobby's near death or maybe something else, but it will break him.

Now Eddie. Eddie, who already felt kind of alone, started his journey of trying to find someone who makes him feel not alone anymore. Who will make him feel enough. Because for Shannon, for Buck he wasn’t(at least it’s how he sees it).

That’s how he sees the cemetery. Buck pushes because Eddie is too much for him at this moment, because he isn't ready (something something “you need to move on. I did.” Eddie himself pushed Buck from himself when he wasn’t ready, but he thought if he would make Buck talk NOW Buck wouldn't break like him.) Buck wasn’t ready to be supported by Eddie, because he never was supported like that (Eddie wasn’t in a place to really support him after the fire truck. don't even start. Eddie was deep into his grief and “suck it up and move on” era to really support Buck on this deep mental level). But Eddie was finally in the place to give this support, and he felt like it’s not enough. So he dates, he meets Marisol. He opens himself to the world and new opportunities. Maybe even starting something serious in season 7, when Buck goes deeper and deeper in his own grief and pain of losing the life he had, of losing the part of himself, of not knowing who he is right now, how he should act.

Now we add Bobby’s and Athena’s water related near death experience and … BOOM. Buck is broken, a crying mess. Because he feels grief and fear of losing people he loves so hard, and he can’t imagine who they felt, and he can’t even say what the fuck is the answer to happiness. He doesn’t remember his death, but he remembers his coma, he remembers how he woke up, he remembers old him, but who is new Buck? To this we also add that he feels that his best friend pushed him away, not understanding he did it first(because he did it subconsciously trying to hide from his feelings).

Buck will break in season 7, because it's long overdue. He has so many things he never “allowed to feel it” before moving on. They can’t just stay forever inside him. “At some point that box is going to blow open. And take everyone around you”. Eddie was ready to support Buck and eventually in season 7 Buck would need it and Eddie would see that Buck needs him, he never allows himself to ask, to see what and who he needs. Buck always tries to look at himself through other people's eyes, still tries with Natalia. Maybe look at himself thought Eddie’s feel help him to see something new

Why I also see the possible divorce era 2.0 it’s because we started and continued 6s with domestic Buckley-Diaz scenes but scenes 6x13 Buck wasn't even talking about Chris. So I see it as a possible proof of divorce era, but after new stills I’m not so sure anymore

#yes it's 2k words. i'm not sorry #i could say more #buck will break in season 7 #911 loves parallels so I used moments not related to the Buck as talk about him relation to his arc too #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #evan buck buckley #911 #911 abc #911 meta #911 season 7 #my 911 thoughts #oliver stark #911 on abc #911 speculation

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canonicallyobserving911 · 2 months

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Buck & Eddie: Buck died for three minutes and seventeen seconds!

In 6x12, Eddie told Buck, “You died, Buck!” but Maddie told him, “Buck, you died” and Bobby said the same thing in 6x15 during Buck’s performance review (related post linked here).

Was Buck dying a huge deal? YES! And apparently, it affected everyone but Buck. Eddie cried in Buck’s hospital room, Chris asked him to come back, Maddie cried, Bobby kept vigil by Buck’s bedside with his rosary beads, Athena knew the effect his death would have on her husband because he sees Buck as a son and she told him to “Wake up damn it”. Chimney cried, Hen did too and May was worried about the effect Buck’s death would have on Bobby just like Athena was worried. Chimney told Albert they had to take Margaret out because she was hysterical but the audience didn’t see her cry like we did everyone in Buck’s found family and I believe that was on purpose (post linked here).

Now, onto 7x1 where Buck told Eddie that he broke up with Natalia because all she talked about was death and he’s not sure why he thought dating her was a good idea (neither did the audience but ok, that was the decision that was made so there’s nothing that can be done about it). TM (showrunner) said in a recent interview, Buck was tired of talking about his "death" and he’s ready to find happiness. If that’s true, then great but if he’s really moved on from it, why didn’t anyone including Eddie, who knows Buck to his core (RG's words) see the growth? Reminder, Eddie's response to Buck's breakup was, "Welcome back to the land of the living, Buck. You were truly missed."

The timeline for last night’s episode was so messed up that it was hard to make heads or tails of anything. Bobby initially bought their cruise tickets in 5x18 but their trip got postponed at the end of 6x1 since Athena's father had a stroke. It begs the question did those tickets get refunded and he purchased new ones because Athena told Frank, two months before they left on their cruise, which happened a year after the bridge collapse 🤷🏽‍♀️that Bobby bought the tickets a week ago, so who knows what time period it is in this realm or wherever they’re in right now. The way things played out, dare I say it but it kind of seems like they’re all still living in Buck’s coma dream but hey, maybe it’s being done on purpose.

Back to the regularly scheduled program…

Reminder, Buck died! And according to Eddie, he was dead for three minutes and seventeen seconds. He was literally dead and even though Chimney worked on Buck for three minutes, he couldn’t restart Buck’s heart, only Eddie could and the last seventeen seconds was all him!

These things happened and they’re important but for some reason, Buck’s death along with everything else that happened to him in season 6 are being treated like they didn’t happen or as if they were of no consequence. In 6x12, Dr. Salazar told Buck that people who have near death experiences either go back to their lives like nothing’s changed or they make a drastic change and quit their jobs, divorce their spouses or they go to Italy.

Well… Buck’s done NEITHER of those things since he’s still doing the same job and he didn’t do anything drastic like move out of the loft or something, just anything other than saying and proclaiming he's happy now all of a sudden. Him breaking up with Natalia wasn’t drastic since he broke up with Taylor in season 5. It would have been different if it had been his first time choosing something for himself but it wasn't.

IMO, the way his death is being glossed over makes it seem like there’s something else that could happen with Buck after 7x6 airs. Reminder, there will be a mini hiatus just like there was between 6x12 and 6x13 and everyone should remember the drastic change that took place then. Buddie and the Buckley-Diaz family were prominent more than any other ship in that episode. Now, be clear, I’m not saying Buck will have a breakdown (even though he's overdue to have one and him crying over Eddie being shot is not the same thing) but I will say he’s headed for a storm. Also, his life is paralleling Eddie’s after the shooting and to me it seems off because Buck’s happy but no one knows why or how he got there. It appears he’s hiding how he truly feels the same way Eddie did before he started panicking followed by his breakdown. Additionally, it appears Buck’s continuing to parallel Athena’s arc for this season too and if he is then, his fear or whatever has him “terrified” will come into play later in the season (post about Bathena and Buddie parallels linked here).

I fully understand the show only has so much “real estate” per episode, as TM described it but in season 6 (which I know should be a distant memory by now for a lot of reasons), the audience only SAW Buck start things but there wasn’t any resolution to any of them. THEY WERE ALL UNFINISHED BY THE END OF 6X18.

In 6x1, he wanted to be interim captain but that storyline fell off a cliff and wasn’t revisited.

In 6x2, he wanted to be happy and apparently, according to OS and TM, this season he’ll be going after the things that make him happy but NO ONE BUT BUCK knows what those things are.

In 6x4, he thought long and hard about being Connor’s sperm donor but there were two things he said that were left unfinished and unresolved.

When he was at Hen’s house, he told her he didn’t want to turn them down but he never said why.

At the end of the episode, he told Connor and Kameron he didn’t know what he wanted (I still think that was a lie but I digress) but he was willing to give them what they wanted.

The audience doesn’t know why Buck didn’t want to turn them down and if he would have said why, there wouldn't be an issue. Also, he never explained what he wants but I suppose the audience is just supposed to forget all about those two important factors and move on the way Buck has. As a viewer, wanting answers to close main characters' storylines is a fair request since we’ve all seen Buck repeat the same mistakes and remain on the hamster wheel (OS’s words) for the last three years with no resolution.

In 6x7, he was adamant about donating even though the universe kept screaming at him not to do it and it went so far as to stop his Jeep on the street but he ran there anyway. Also, only him and Eddie touched the cursed bracelet during that episode but nothing came of that either.

In 6x9, he told the team he was the creator of new life and he had a onesie on the nightstand with an LAFD logo on it but that too went absolutely nowhere (posts linked here and here).

In 6x10, he died! But also, before he did, he talked a lot about family but no one knows if he wants his own family or if he’s happy with his biological or found or both.

In 6x11, he was in a coma for most of the episode where it was all about him (he was making things about himself again like everyone has told him he does) but when he woke up, he told Bobby there was one thing he couldn’t fix while he was in it but since he didn’t say it, NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THAT IS.

In 6x12, when Eddie asked him if could ask him how he was, Buck replied, “Honestly Eddie… I don’t know”; well, since he didn't say it, neither does the audience. Also, he went to Maddie’s and told her about his coma dream but the only part the audience heard was that it was never nighttime and the first thing he does when he wakes up is text Bobby.

In 6x13, he knew how to do math and his life appeared to be going where he wanted it to but then, 6x14 happened and his math powers were gone.

In 6x15, aside from meeting the DeAtH dOuLA and telling her about his dream (which the audience didn’t hear then either), he told Eddie while they were in the cemetery, “The truth is… I am different but I feel like I have to be the same old Buck, mostly for the sake of everyone else”. Is he still being the same old Buck now? Who knows?

From 6x16 through 6x18, Buck was still acting like the same old Buck then he ended the season in another lackluster boring relationship with someone who he believed SAW him but everyone knows she didn’t see $hit.

Now here’s my main issue and please don’t misunderstand me. If Buck’s all great and happy, FINE but it’s hard to correlate his new found happiness with everything he’s been through especially since the audience didn’t get to see his journey. He’s not in therapy and he’s not reading self-help books or whatever anymore so how did he get from point A to point B? Inquiring minds would like to know.

Since the audience remains in the dark, are we supposed to just accept him saying he’s better? I’m not buying that snake oil they’re selling and my reasoning for it is based on two things. First, Buck identifies himself as a firefighter but that wasn’t addressed before season 6 ended because IMO it tied in with everything else he experienced. Also, Buck’s actions in the promos and trailers make it seem like he’s hesitant about something regarding his job. Could the narrative change? ABSOLUTELY but if it doesn’t, no one knows if he is or isn’t still struggling.

Reminder, Buck broke up with Natalia but Eddie didn’t know and why is that? Their lack of communication could be due to the wacky time jumps or the miscalculation of them but in any event, they hadn't discussed it even though they're working together again. In 7x1, they kept showing how close they are but there’s obviously some things they still haven’t discussed including Buck’s death. Please note, Buck is once again paralleling Athena since there’s something she hasn��t told Bobby too. They're both not saying the stuff they should be and if they continue to parallel then all should be revealed soon.

This post is simply to highlight the fact that Buck took another journey but once again, the audience has NO IDEA how he got there just like at the end of season 5 when he finally ended things with Taylor. Sure he broke up with her but he didn’t do it because he was unhappy, he did it because she did something he probably knew she would do anyway especially since she betrayed the 118 and Bobby in 2x6 so what exactly is the audience supposed to believe? He’s changed even though we didn’t see it? I call BS and I think TM is lying just like he did about Eddie’s PTSD. He said Eddie wouldn’t go through it but a few months later he did and it was important to his healing.

Will anything come of all the things Buck experienced in season 6? Who knows but apparently the audience is just supposed to roll with the idea that he’s 100% better even though we didn’t see any of it. Reminder, we saw everyone else’s journey and how they clawed their way back after their breakdowns, i.e., Eddie’s, Maddie’s, Athena’s, Chimney’s and even Bobby’s after he had two, one in 2x16 and one in season 1 after the plane crash but we’re supposed to accept the fact that Evan “Please don’t leave me, I make things about me and I like to fix things” “Buck” Buckley is ok? NOPE! I’m not buying it.

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #911 abc #911 on abc #911 meta #911 speculation #911 spoilers #anti bucktalia #911 season 7 #911 season 7 speculation #evan buckley character study 911 #oliver stark #ryan guzman

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wanderingwomanwondering · 1 year

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You can’t tell me that this...

And this...

...Aren’t the same image. And there’s something about the role of their shared vocation in their relationship. It’s what’s between them, connecting them and separating them in a way. The truck in 414 and the ladder in 610. Like they both have to mentally get past The Job™️ to see what more they are/can be to each other???

I think it’s interesting that buck was pointedly not in uniform when he saved (uniformed) eddie in 414 but both buck and eddie are in full turnout gear when eddie saves buck in 610.

I’ve talked before about why I think buck was “without his armor” aka uniform in 414. He had to save eddie as himself, not just as a firefighter doing his job. And season 5 bore that out. He was taking care of chris off duty, he was in the room for eddie’s breakdown off duty, he helped eddie remember his purpose and heal off duty. Buck was himself and not just his professional role. The two of them have more than just firefighting between them but they have to start seeing that and buck supporting eddie’s healing in s5 was the start or at least a huge step forward in that revelation.

Eddie is more reserved. More attached to his firefighter armor. He is growing and healing. No doubt! But he’s still a person who plays the deep things close to the vest and the only/main person who’s seen eddie's hand (buddie poker pic, anyone?!) when it comes to really deep breakdown-level emotions is buck. We all know that bobby is a close second (ie the post-shannon cage fighting arc) but this post isn’t about him lol.

Eddie knows buck has gotten close to him in a way that no one else really has and it scares the shit out of him. I know the fandom likes to act like eddie letting buck in is easy somehow but I honestly don’t think that’s true. My dude had to literally break down a whole ass door to get to the truly and fully vulnerable and hurting version of eddie. Anyway eddie still struggles with letting the deep stuff fully show, even with the people he loves and who he knows love him. He’s getting better - much better! - but he’s still not there yet. I think the high ladder and full turnout gear during the lightning strike somehow speaks to that???

In 6b I think Eddie has to do something similar to what buck did in 5b. While buck was kinda forced by the circumstances to start to literally and figuratively dwell in or more fully inhabit his deeper connection to the diaz fam, eddie has to choose to take off his armor. He has to choose to open up about how much buck means to him. This would be a nice progression from buck breaking down the door. Eddie has to let him into his vulnerability and pain. I think we’re gonna get that in 611 or later in 6b. The hospital visits in 6b are ripe for eddie's emotional unshelling and I can't wait.

I don’t think 611 will be a love confession or anything ofc 😔 but we will absolutely (eventually) get a heartfelt speech about what buck means to eddie and chris and how he has to come back to them because they love him and honestly can’t imagine their lives without him.

We already saw from preview that eddie is torn up inside over buck's accident. Now he has to let all that pain hang out. Buck was dangling from that ladder, and so was eddie in a way with no emotional harness. Buck was in the same emotional place back in 413/414 but we didn't get a full deep emotional buddie conversation about it. I'm hoping Healing!Eddie delivers his half of that conversation in 6b. I have a sneaking suspicion that eddie is going to say or show a lot of his emotional state while buck is unconscious and we may have to wait for the actual shared conversation between them, but maybe the show will surprise me and we'll get a good start to a real conversation in 611. *dreaming big*

#911 meta #buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buckley diaz family #911 4x14 #911 6x10 #911 6x11 spec #911 6b #911 fox

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they-reap-what-we-sow · 2 years

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healing in 5b

this season was all about healing, and we got so many lovely arcs out of it, and especially in the finale.

the big arcs obviously, Maddie's and Eddie's: those two literally went through hell in 5a and 5b both, and they fought to heal themselves, to feel better, for their family. the finale did such an amazing job of bringing together 18 episodes of setup as it finally brought both Maddie and Eddie back to where they belong: with their families and at the dispatch/118

Eddie and Bobby/Ramon was such a fun journey to see. We went from Eddie completely blowing up at Bobby (who was trying to support him in the best way that he could) to Bobby being there for Eddie in the wake of his breakdown to Eddie using the things he learned from Bobby (and his therapist) to try and fix his relationship with his actual father. And then the scene in the finale? Well, if you can't say full circle relationship there, where can you say it? Therapy!Eddie is healthy, wealthy, and thriving, and he's doing his best to share that emotional strength as he accidentally saves Bobby from himself.

Madney as a whole have been through so much this season, but even individually, Maddie and Chim went through huge trauma and doubt. Maddie about her capability as a mother, Chim about his capabilities as a partner, and I think the choice to let them both heal and grow on their own before (HOPEFULLY) bringing them back together only makes their relationship all the stronger.

I've always felt that BuckTaylor was an unhealthy relationship. Not the couple itself, they definitely had some chemistry, and both of them were genuinely trying to make things work, but the way that they got together in the first place. Buck was so shaken(literally) in the aftermath of the shooting, and he latched onto the first person who offered him their hand. The way they broke up, well, we could have seen it coming from a mile out. Buck and Taylor unfortunately will always be on opposite sides when it comes to this kind of argument, simply because of who they are as people. They might have tried to overlook each other's faults, but neither of them could hold on. Buck and Taylor both knew that it was time to separate, and doing so was good for both of them, they way she finally left, it wasn't bitter, it wasn't a typical break-up scene, it was a mutual understanding between two people who (I hope) will be friends in the long run.

Henren had a lot of new starts and revelations too, especially in the back half of s5. We got some beautiful scenes of Hen and Karen finding themselves again, becoming at peace with who they are, with no regrets. Plus the conversation in the finale was one that was so sweet, my heart especially felt for Karen not being mad at Toni for her sake, but for Hen's. Karen has been through a lot with the drama with Hen and Eva, and I think they've finally settled into their relationship and family together, at peace.

Honorable mention to Albert, who opened himself up to Chimney, even thinking that Chimney might reject him for how he was feeling about firefighting. Chim not only assuaged his fears abut also encouraged him to do what he really wants to, a marked difference for Albert from what he ran from their Father for.

over all, 5b has been an amazing season, with literally no bad episodes. 911 writers y'all are doing the GOOD shit recently, keep it up. but stop fucking doing insect episodes those are the fucking worst

#911 show #911 on fox #911 meta #911 s5 #911 spoilers #eddie diaz #evan buckley #bobby nash #henrietta wilson #karen wilson #maddie buckley #chimney han #albert han #taylor kelly #ramon diaz #krowabbey

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lovecolibri · 2 years

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I'm so mad they decided to cut those what 4 seconds of terrified eddie looking at buck? For what? Knowing life and death of the spiderman guy? It's me or since KR is in charge the setup for the calls lasts a lifetime? Honestly who cares about these strangers?

I know a lot of people are happy with how the breakdown scene played out and found it true to character and that’s fine! I personally am *slayed* by that clip that to me looks like Eddie just spilled out the line about them all being dead and has gone back to sobbing and then looks up at Buck, absolutely terrified of the judgment and disappointment he’s so sure he’s going to see, while we know Buck is nothing but understanding and brokenhearted to see someone he loves so much hurting so deeply. I think that’s incredibly powerful, and giving us a moment where Eddie realizes he’s not alone and Buck is going to hold things together so Eddie doesn’t have to, even if it’s just a moment where he leans into Buck and draws some strength from him before Buck goes to let Chris know his dad is okay would have been something to witness. I also personally think that the cut to after Buck has already gotten Eddie up and calmed down, gotten Chris calmed down, and put to bed was jarring, and I also thinks we should have at least seen part of Eddie destroying the room if nothing else.

I just think that seeing Buck’s interactions with Chris, Buck breaking down the door and listening to Eddie briefly, and then Buck coming back to talk to Eddie after putting Chris to bed sort of ends up centering the whole thing around Buck’s presence. His presence IS important, and I’m thrilled we got to see it, but I would have liked getting a fuller measure of the breakdown from Eddie’s POV, maybe hearing something from Chris as Buck is putting him to bed as well. IDK, I just wanted more focus on Eddie about the breakdown instead of it sort of being tacked on to the end of the episode and then never talked about outside of brief mentions between Eddie/Buck and Eddie/Bobby. We had more scenes of every team member showing concern and commenting on L’s inability to handle getting lucky on a call and having a tantrum about it than we did seeing any of them worrying about Eddie, (even if they didn’t hear the full extent of what happened) and I think THAT is what is so irritating to me about knowing there was more footage out there and instead we got a 10 minute set up for a call that easily could have started when May answered the homeowner’s 9-1-1 call.

I won’t say that this is entirely a new thing and all on KR, because the show has spent time on call setups before but I think it’s been more noticeable because we haven’t been getting time for the things we WANT to see and the long set ups are for characters we don’t need to connect with! They only had that short set up scene with the three old men and we were still able to connect with the idea of 3 guys having been friends for most of their lives! Or look at Stuck and that escalator call! That one has me in shambles every time and we only see the briefest moment of him picking out the box for the ring! A longer set up when there is something in the story they want us to connect with our mains, or as just a little bit of fun to ease the tension elsewhere in the episode is something they’ve done before, but I can tell you I can’t think off the top of my head of any emergency where I was conscious that the set up was taking forever and wasn’t really needed, or had a thought of “are we getting to the point any time soon?” until season 5. They seem to be getting a little more back on track with the focus on the main character’s storylines so maybe that will help with that feeling but every time I get to the end of an episode and think about how there was a really good character moment I wished we had seen, I can’t help but look back at some of the longer emergency set ups and wonder why that was the thing that got kept instead of some of the character work.

#my sweet nonnie friends #911 #911 spoilers

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pxrxmoore · 1 year

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hello there beth i've come bearing gifts! did some watching of 911 edits as one does and came across a few 5sos/911 edits you'll enjoy: we got a cute want you back buck, bad omens buddie 🥲 and the bi anthem for talk fast buck

also as you remember a few months ago i came to you with a question about schitts creek/5sos question so im here again! if you had to assign each boy to a character in 911 which will you choose and why?

ok hope you have a lovely day 💞 thank you for the endless gifs i saw of this show before i finally caved in <3

maya my darling 💛 welcome to the slowly expanding group of 5sos to 911 stans, it’s so lovely to have u join us 😌🫶 i hope u are well and i’m sorry for sucking u in to this 😌

my love thank you for these gifts they’re so beautiful 😭🫶 not the want u back edit starting w buck getting the kid outta the claw machine that’s the cutest scene 😭 god i am Devastated 😭 BAD OMENS BUDDIE!!!!! because Evan. that fuckin ripped me APART 😫 talk fast !!!!! bisexual anthem !!!!! evan buck buckley !!!!! 🙏💕💞💓💗💖💘💝

ooffff ok ok yes!!!! i love this q!! under a read more u know how it be

ashton - bobby / hen / buck

ashton was a rly hard one to pin down because i see parts of him in a couple of characters. firstly bobby - absolutely the father figure and very much the voice of reason when it comes to his team/band/friends. but also shoulders too much of that weight sometimes until it’s noticeably heavy to others. little stubborn to ask for help. i see those characteristics in hen too. such a strong beautiful person who has a clear mindset in what she wants and how to reach it. but takes on way too much at once and only asks for help when it all crumbles. and lastly i see some of buck there too, maybe not so much now that buck is on his breakdown era 😌 like i think ash has come a long long way to break out of his self destructive habits and of putting others first without even thinking about how it could affect him but i’m sure old habits die hard. but i also see buck as ash in the way he lights up a room and is so charming and thoughtful

luke - buck / ravi

i also see a lot of the same destructive tendencies of buck in luke. passing out the ‘good’ pieces of himself to others, putting on a brave face. putting all of the weight of the world on his own shoulders. but also. youngest brother and all the teasing that comes with that 😌🫶 god and he is just so pretty they’re both devastating. but i also for sure see luke as ravi - again youngest brother (idk if that’s canon but he deff gives those vibes of the younger sibling) and getting ribbed by the others, slightly awkward in new situations and around new people and uses comedy as a way to deflect 🫶

calum - eddie

not because i said ash could be buck i swear 😌 no but strong silent type, takes a while to warm up to people but you have his full trust once he’s got you under his wing. he is so fucking expressive 😭 background eddie in scenes vs calum in any interview when he’s not being asked something directly 🫶 he’s made some fucking tough decisions that altered his entire life path, tho calum’s giving up soccer to play in the band is obv a huge positive force that changed everything for him whereas i think eddie has really had to come to terms with his decisions in maybe a more negative way to begin with. therapised eddie tho giving out that love and positivity freely to his friends reminds me very much of calum

michael - chim

god he is so fucking strong and he loves so deeply and loudly. will drop everything to be there for his friends and give them his full support. when he’s so fucking sure of something he’ll pursue it to the ends of the earth. very much michael putting everything in to the band to give himself and the boys a new start at life and he carries that with him now in every band decision. he’s such a strong force within the band he has so much faith in his friends. also he’s fuckin funny mans got jokes 😌🫶

thank u so much my love!!! i hope u have a wonderful day 🥰💛

#currently on the train so thank u for helping me pass the time 🙏🫶#no but same i kept seeing gifs and it took so long to finally cave and watch lmfaoooooo #i love this for us all truly #love you!!!! 💛#lemme know ur thoughts 🥰#911 #beecosmic #my brain is fuzzy and i feel like i’ve forgotten one of the 118 LOL help

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stagefoureddiediaz · 2 years

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Okay so Promo costume meta time - this might be mostly incoherent ramblings because I’m still recovering - is recovery even possible at this point?? Some of this is copied from answers to asks i’ve given in the past day - its easier than rewriting the same thing out twice and I’m all about saving myself some time!

easy stuff first and under the cut!

Angela being in Orange in the sit down - these are usually a costume - so we’re continuing to see Athena in orange this season - since the black out and Harry storyline and the healing after - we’ve seen her in Orange a couple of times - Orange is a happy colour and it also denotes emotional strength so yay for Athena being in a good place! its symbolic of where she’s at in her relationship with Bobby as its around him when she’s worn it before - the casino - when they were having fun and being all in love!!

Maddie - I have a whole post on Maddie so I’m not going to go into massive detail here - I should have it out tomorrow - needless to say the promo stuff is interesting - all the casual baggy clothing - she’s seeking comfort and to hide her self a bit - its about protection. The check waterfall coat - its a check print so whatever is happening while she’s wearing it is not going to be happy time!! ( my money is on that being when Chim finds her and she’s not happy about it!)

The green striped outfit - I’m going to go out on a limb and say this is from a later episode in 5b - green is a colour of harmony and balance - its about health and feeling safe and secure - it is also about growth and prosperity. Its also fun that Chim is wearing green in the sam scene - but it is check printed so 👀 there might be a problem or bump in the road coming as part of or after we see that scene!

Eddie - all dark colours - we are in it people! also interesting that the two sobbing scenes - Eddie with the baseball bat and Maddie in the ocean - they are both wearing a muddy grey/green/brown so we’re definitely paralleling them and we’re seeing colours so often associated with depression and

Anyway back to Eddie - The knee rip in his jeans is interesting because it’s not like Eddie at all - but it fits in with a little theme - s1 Buck wears torn/ distressed jeans to his awful therapy appointment (interestingly it’s the same knee that’s ripped) I know what you’re thinking - but that wasn’t a good therapy appointment etc.

But here’s the thing it’s not about the therapy appointment or what happened there - it’s about Bucks mindset - this is the first time Buck has experienced losing someone and he doesn’t know what to do about it - he’s lucky in that he confides in Bobby who pushes him toward therapy, and yes that didn’t exactly work out in this case (although Buck would claim it did and eventually got his actual therapy from talking to Devon’s sister) but it did set Buck on the course of being receptive to therapy going forward - as we see later on.

Now here’s where that ties to Eddie in the promo scene - Eddie has probably spent his life being told to suck it up, put it away and move on, that therapy is for weak people etc so that’s what he’s always done - repressed everything and dismissed therapy - except when he was forced to to keep his job - no wonder he didn’t ‘click’ with Frank. So that rip is like bucks rips - tears in his armour that is going to make him receptive to therapy and talking going forward - he’s reached the point where he knows he really does need help - that he’s let buck see those rips and his breakdown is testament to their relationship- only Buck is the one who Eddie will allow in this far - so buck will be the one to guide him to therapy and this time - because Eddie has the support he’s never had before - therapy is going to work.

The shirt is a whole other fun thing - the use of a similar but darker and more muddy shade to the Ana break up one is again intentional - Eddie thought that breaking up with Ana would stop his panic attacks - that he’d be magically cured by ending the thing he saw as causing them. Only what he actually did was open the defences a little - Ana is just the straw that broke the camels back - we’ve seen more stuff trickling out in 5A until Eddie leaves the 118 in 5x10 - again the jacket is a muddied shade of green - it’s a bit brighter because it’s a decision he’s made (it’s the tiny bit of relief at easing the burden a fraction) think is it’s widened those defences a bit more - now everything is coming out faster and with more force until we hit breakdown - when he’s in the muddiest coloured shirt we’ve seen him in.

Eddie’s shirts while muted and generally neutral in tone have always been clean colours (and by that I mean they are an obvious colour - cream, black, tan, grey, olive green etc) whereas this shirt is murky looking - it’s a brown/grey/green - it just looks depressed and confused. And that’s the point - his defences are more or less destroyed by this point - all the stuff he’s repressed up to now is flooding out and it’s a murky mess (that one Ana left him to deal with!!!) But, now its flooded out, it can be picked through and sorted and dealt with.

So that’s what those shirts are saying - they’re showing eddies decent to breaking point in an additional visual way that you as a viewer will subconsciously pick up on (unless like me you’re trained in costume and colour theory so it’s less sub conscious and more concious!) and it adds layers to the effectiveness of the storytelling

Buck

The Eddie sobbing scene - I’m pretty sure it’s a shirt - buck has gone shirt crazy in season 5 - which is all about buttoning up - protecting oneself or choosing to keep things hidden by behaving somewhat stiffly - the phrase in the dictionary has this definition - (of a person) not inclined to reveal thoughts or information; reserved or inhibited. 👀👀👀 In the screenshot I brightened it looked more yellow ochre/ orangey, but there is literally so little of it it’s hard to tell - being right at the edge of the screen means the colour gets distorted.

I do think there’s a pretty decent chance it’s the one from Olis bts photo (again terrible lighting helping me with the actual colour!!) and if so we’re looking at puce type colour - which is a dark reddish brown - kinda like dried blood!! If it is puce it’s a super super interesting choice - combining the colour meanings of brown and red together - red = passion, confidence, danger and energy - and Brown = stability, dependability, comfort, reliability, support and protection!

So by combining the two you get a colour that is showing how much Buck is going to be there for Eddie - how he’s intending to be his rock, fight for his corner, supporting him and comforting him, and do it all with a determined and earnest passion! (And I am so here for that!!)

He has a black tee under his shirt in the bts whereas it’s a white shirt in the Buck actually scenes and this is interesting if it plays out how many of us are thinking it might - if he’s wearing it and abandons Tay Kay to go to Eddie’s side - then it’s reflective of both his relationship with Tay Kay and Eddie. The black tee showing us his relationship is not a good one - it’s soulless and dark - not in a good place.

If you think about where his relationship is likely to be with Eddie at this point as well - we know Buck isn’t initially going to understand why Eddie would leave the 118 - Oliver told us so. So if that relationship is still distant and a bit strained - again not necessarily in the best place at that moment and again born out of a lack of true understanding of the other person but we know that this will change for Buck - him seeing Eddie at his worst and lowest point will clue him into why Eddie left and he can step up and in with Eddie.

That’s why it’s important the Eddie scene would come second if it plays out this way and we get Buck leaving Tay to be there for Eddie- because although the costume is important for the first scene - it’s true meaning lies in the second. And that’s where the over shirt comes into play - a puce colour - dried blood which in and of itself is an interesting colour choice for that scene - having Eddie break down in-front of buck wearing the colour of dried blood when Eddie is potentially reliving the shooting - it becomes even more interesting if Buck is indeed wearing a white shirt with dark pinstripes in the scene where Maddie enters his apartment because then we are very definitely in 4x13/14 parallel territory - particularly if we reflect on Bucks thought process towards Taylor at that time - when he didn’t trust her not to put her job first, when he thought she was there to try and get the story - all things that we continue to see from her!!!!!!!!!

Sorry if this is a bit of a rambly mess - my brain is still trying to unscramble itself from the promo and all the possibilities and the knowledge that even though we might have a vague idea - we don’t truly know the extent of what they have in store for us!! as always my inbox is always open for questions!

tags: sorry if i forgot you - shout at me and I’ll add you!!

@loveyourownsmiilee @lovecolibri @adamsparirsh @prettyboyandthekid @fiona-fififi @kitkatpancakestack @ktinastrikesback @mandzuking17 @oneawkwardcookie @outrunningthedark @reallysmartladymariecurie @theladyyavilee @leothil

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sevensoulmates · 3 years

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Thoughts on Taylor and Buck (and Eddie) in 4x14

For people worrying about bucktaylor.....I just want you to think about the moment Taylor first shows up in this episode. This is coming off half of season’s worth of episodes of Taylor and Buck building up a friendship. A close one too.

And yet...

When Buck is reeling, panting like he's on the verge of a panic attack, still blinking back tears (and failing) like he's gonna break down sobbing at any moment. It's the most vulnerable moment of his life and he steps out of the hospital and spots Taylor near other press trying to get in.

And he doesn’t think "this is Taylor my friend, my safe space, who I go to when I'm vulnerable and need someone who loves me". He took one look at her and saw the moment she stabbed him in the back and was going to turn Bobby's worst moment into a news story. He looked at her and his face fell and his voice shook and he turned around to leave and he said "no comment".

I was surprised by this because we've seen Taylor become a close friend to him this season and for him to be pushing her away so hard in this scene, like he couldn’t allow himself to have this breakdown in front of her because she could potentially use it against him. It proves to me that although they are becoming friends, Taylor has not yet earned his entire trust back from her season 2 betrayals (and from her season 4 rejections). (Remind us of anyone else we know? *cough* Eddie and Shannon)

Taylor wanted to drive him to Chris and he refused. She had to push him, had to tell him he couldn't see Chris like this, bloodied and shaken, for him to agree. And even still when he’s in the presence of Christopher, one half of Buck’s ultimate safe space, he fucking loses it. I have more thoughts on Buck and the significance of him crying with Christopher later.

More under the cut:

Taylor is worrying about him the whole episode, but after this first moment he addresses her really nonchalantly. She's pissed at him for being reckless, she obviously is showing him she cares, and Buck is flirting. He's smiling and teasing Taylor and she's like??? I'm mad at you?? For endangering yourself?? Buck, who has been on the brink of collapse all episode, is putting on a brave face and pretending he's alright, even in front of Taylor.

And yeah it ends in a kiss but when it comes to the choice of chasing after Taylor (who’s essentially just shown that she does have feelings for Buck) or going to Eddie, Buck makes the choice to go to Eddie.

The very next scene we see Buck opening up to Eddie. Telling him that he broke down in front of Christopher, that he's sorry he failed Eddie and Chris like that, and that he wishes he had been shot instead of Eddie. Buck cracks open his heart and shows Eddie his insecurities, his darkest thoughts, his failures, his regrets. And how does Eddie respond?

He gives Buck the ultimate gift. But more on that later.

The next scene with Buck and Taylor involves Taylor coming back after she left after refusing to talk to Buck about her feelings for him.

Buck says "You came back. Wasn't sure that was going to happen." And that's because everyone who Buck has had a romantic relationship with thus far has left him, and he didn't think Taylor would be the one to break the cycle. Already she's fallen in line with everyone else having left the first time.

(Speculation: This is why I think Buck will be the one to end their relationship next season, or it will be implied that’s he the one who ended it.)

And again, how does Buck conduct himself in this scene? His face is light, he's laughing. And although he admits that "he spent a long time feeling like he wasn't enough" and although he attempts to be vulnerable here, this scene is still all about whether TAYLOR wants him. Whether she chooses to be with him. And even though Taylor says she does....she hasn't (yet) done anything to prove it. And I doubt in Buck's heart of hearts that he truly believes her.

Now, we get to Buck and Eddie's last and most powerful scene together. Because Eddie doesn't just say it. He proves it with his actions. Actions he made a whole ass year ago. And he decides to tell Buck now when he didn’t tell Buck then, because he saw this whole episode how Buck was consistently devaluing himself and his life. Buck thinks he’s expendable, thinks he’s a burden, thinks he doesn’t matter, thinks no one wants him (even AFTER the bucktaylor moment, mind you). And Eddie tells him to his face: “YOU’RE WRONG.”

By making Buck Christopher’s legal guardian should anything happen to Eddie, Eddie has not only proven how much he trusts Buck, but he has told him you’re essential, you matter, you’re a gift, and we want you in our lives no matter what.

Eddie has seen Buck at his worst. He’s seen Buck being petulant and childish and territorial, he’s seen Buck being reckless and diving into danger head first, he’s seen Buck being kinda dumb sometimes, he’s seen Buck after (to Buck) he lost Eddie’s son in a tsunami, seen Buck furious at his parents, and seen Buck feeling like all he was good for is “spare parts”. Eddie loved and trusted him through nearly losing Christopher, through the lawsuit, through the street-fighting, through nearly dying underground, through nearly dying on the street after getting shot. And Eddie still chose Buck through all of it. Each and every time. Still said, you are who I want for my son (and as it’s heavily implied: for himself).

And you can see it in Buck’s face in that last frame. When Eddie says it, Buck believes it.

So although the two bucktaylor kisses may feel like a loss to some, I think the whole of bucktaylor’s scenes in this episode just show such a stark contrast to the strength that is Buck’s relationship with Eddie. And I think that next season if Bucktaylor becomes a full on relationship, it will not last, and I still think we’re headed towards Buddie endgame.

#buddie #buck x eddie #911 fox #buck x taylor #911 meta #4x14 #season 5 speculation #I have a lot of thoughts on this episode I just need to get it organized and find some time to write it out

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cyllaeth · 3 years

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getaway green

find it on ao3

“Yeah, yeah… Love ya too, man.”

Eddie abruptly stops before he enters the changing room. Heʼd recognise that voice everywhere because itʼs Buckʼs. But the words he overheard make him uneasy. Love ya too? To whom Buck might have said it? The most likely answer is to Eddie but he’s right here and he’s definitely not talking with his best friend. It’s not Chim either because Eddie saw him already in the station. So… Who else? Albert? No, that’s just ridiculous. Albert and Buck are friends—not as good as him and Buck, obviously—but why would they talk via phone when they probably saw each other this morning in Buck’s apartament? It doesn’t make sense. So… Who is it then?

Eddie feels like someone just twisted his guts. Has Buck met someone new? No, he would’ve told him about his new relationship, he’s sure of it. His best friend has told him about reconnecting with Taylor and doing the whole “friendship without benefits” thing, for god’s sake. He would at least mention that he met someone worth dating.

It’s not very helpful or reassuring, though. Eddie knows it sounds bad but he doesn’t want Buck to find someone to date. Unless it’s him Buck would be dating. He can’t stand the idea of Buck spending his free time with someone else, kissing someone else, loving someone else.

Eddie’s very much in love with his best friend. He’s tried to get over with him by dating Ana. And it was a fucking disaster because everytime he kissed her, he wished it was Buck instead. So… It’s safe to say he got it bad. And he has to keep it under control because he doesn’t want to blow up the best friendship he’s ever had. Telling Buck he’s in love with him is not even an option.

He tries to suppress his jealousy and finally goes to the changing room. Buck’s already in his work clothes and he’s scrolling through his instagram; there’s a wide smile on his face. When he hears Eddie coming in, he looks at him and his grin gets even bigger.

“You’re almost late, Diaz.” He teases and Eddie can’t help himself but smile too.

“Almost late makes a big difference.” Eddie emphasises, quickly changing his clothes. Buck only rolls his eyes. When they’re both ready, they go upstairs and greet their coworkers. The blonde goes to the coffeemaker and he pours two cups of coffee—one for him and one for Eddie—and he hands it over to his friend. They sit on the couch as usual; their arms and thighs pressed together as if there’s any free space left.

“Uh, I’ve got news.” Buck says and waits until everyone pays attention to him. “TK’s coming to LA this weekend.”

“Wait, wait, wait. Do you mean the TK with whom you stole the fire truck and who you were flirting with?” Chim asks curiously.

Eddie nearly chokes on his coffee.

Was Buck really flirting with that kid from Austin? Sure, he noticed that dumbass and dumbasser hit it off very quickly but it wasn’t something unusual—Buck was so sweet and easygoing, it was almost impossible to not like him.

“I wasn’t flirting with him! I just invited him to LA! And besides, he has a boyfriend. Who is coming with him, by the way.” Buck explains; he’s slightly embarrassed, Eddie can tell, because his cheeks are more pink than usual. Again, why would he feel embarrassed if he wasn’t flirting with TK?

Maybe he was flirting but he just doesn’t want to admit that? Whispers a very annoying voice in Eddie’s mind. He tries to silence it.

“That’s amazing! Is that captain Strand’s son? You should come by the station with them, I want to meet them.”

Bobby’s voice pulls him away from his thoughts.

“Sure, I was actually thinking… Maybe we can have a night out together? As a team?” Buck suggests. “TK says he can’t wait to meet all of you guys.”

“Fantastic idea. I’ll ask him if youʼre bluffing.” Chim quips. Eddie has a strong urge to strangle him.

And then it hits him. Buck was talking with TK earlier, in the changing room. It was definitely TK.

The jealousy is eating him alive. Sure, Strand may have a boyfriend but is it really that big obstacle? Women were flirting with him when he was still married to Shannon; they’ve pretended not to see his wedding ring and ask him out anyway.

Oh, shit. What if he will be the witness of Buck flirting with TK? He’s not sure he can handle that. How will he react? What if he will finally blow up and say something he’s not meant to? He shouldn’t tempt fate and just stay at home instead of going out with the 118 and TK. He decides to gently decline the offer and thinks about a good excuse—he could easily use Christopher as a reason to not go with the team—and Buck would totally understand it.

When he finally opens his mouth to say something, the bell rings. Of course.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The whole friendship thing between Buck and TK is bothering him so much, he can’t even fully focus on the job. He’s so distracted that Bobby asks him if he’s okay. He shrugs his shoulders and lies that he’s completely fine. What would he say anyway? That he’s in love with his best friend who doesn’t love him back and he’s probably into another, very cute firefighter? No, this is already pathetic as it is. No need to embarrass himself more. When they’re back at the station, he’s almost on the edge. He needs to find out more, even if it causes him more pain.

He quietly follows Buck to the kitchen and when they crash on the couch, he musters up courage to ask him about his relationship with TK.

“I didn’t know you and TK were such close friends.” He says, trying to sound playful, teasing.

Buck sighs heavily.

“Oh, come on, man, you too?” He groans and shoots Eddie kind of an annoyed look. “Yes, we’re close and it’s nice to have a friend outside of the 118. And we’re just friends. No flirting, no hook ups. Besides, I’ve mentioned he has a boyfriend who will be there with us.”

Eddie believes him; he hears honesty in his voice and it makes him a little bit calmer. He feels like he can finally breathe again and—

“I wouldn’t flirt with him anyway even if he was single because I think I might be in love with someone else.”

Eddie swears he can hear his heart shattering on a million pieces. He wasnʼt prepared to hear this, he wasnʼt expected to have a breakdown in the middle of a shift. Buckʼs in love and he didnʼt know about this. How? Who is it?

“What?” Is the only thing he manages to whisper.

“I’m in love with someone.” Buck repeats. It’s very quiet, unsure, almost fragile. Like he’s afraid of Eddie’s reaction, afraid of being open and vulnerable. Afraid of being in love.

It breaks Eddie’s heart even more because the only thing that’s worse than his broken heart, it’s Evan Buckley’s broken heart.

“Oh. Are you... Does this person know about it?” He asks gently, moving a little closer to his best friend. He feels like heʼs been hit by a truck but right now he wants to at least reassure Buck itʼs okay, make him feel better. Thatʼs what friends do anyway. He can have a full breakdown in his own house when heʼll be alone. He starts to pat his back lightly and after a while, he can feel Buck relaxes a bit.

“No... It’s… Complicated. It’s probably best if I don’t say anything. At least nothing will be destroyed. I canʼt destroy it.” He hears Buck’s muttering. He understands him perfectly; sometimes not telling the truth is just the best option.

Eddie still feels jealousy, he envies the nameless person who Buck loves. He’s trying to shove down his feelings and only focus on his friend to cheer him up.

“You wanna come home with me after the shift? We could make pizza together and watch some movies with Chris.” He proposes. He realizes he said coming home—like it was their home. Not only his and Chris’ but Buck’s too. And it is his home; Buck belongs to the Diaz family anyway.

His invitation instantly lightens up Buck’s mood because he finally looks at him and there’s a small smile dancing on his lips.

“Deal. But only if you stay away from the kitchen, we don’t wanna call 911 to the firefighter’s house. You can wash the dishes.”

“Fine. Whatever you wish.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The rest of the week passes fairly peacefully. They don’t talk again about Buck’s feelings and Eddie successfully pretends he’s not jealous. They joke and bicker as always so it’s fine, it seems like everythingʼs perfect.

It’s Friday—and it means TK and Carlos are coming. Buck has a day off and he’s picking them up from the airport and giving them a quick LA tour. Eddie’s working and so are Hen, Chim and Bobby. It’s a busy shift so they’re definitely not bored; Buck keeps them entertained between the calls—he’s blowing up Eddie’s phone with texts and photos.

Eddieʼs happy that his friend is enjoying his day off, he really is. Of all people in the world, Buckʼs the one who deserves it the most. He wishes heʼd be there with him.

» from Buck: dude, we totally need to take Chris to this museum of space, heʼll be thrilled«

Eddie opens another photo from his friend—this time itʼs Buckʼs selfie whoʼs standing in front of the museum and smiling. It melts Eddieʼs heart because Buck always thinks about Christopher, always includes him in his plans. Despite what Hen says, heʼs aware that theyʼre basically co-parenting Chris; he canʼt pinpoint the exact moment when Buck has become a second dad, it just... Happened.

» to Buck: iʼm in. so museum and sleepover at my house next saturday? i think i need to get my revenge after last time«

Buckʼs response is immediate.

»from Buck: you can keep dreaming, Diaz«

Eddie stifles a laugh when he reads the message. At least, heʼs the one Buck chooses to share even small things with. And at this moment, everything is alright.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

They finally meet at the 118ʼs favourite pub. Eddie went home after the shift to drop Chris at Abuela and change into something nicer. He tried once to say heʼs not going out with them but he quickly changed his mind when he saw the disappointment in Buckʼs eyes. Heʼs quite nervous, though. Despite what his friend said about flirting with TK, the doubt, the uncertainty is still there. He hopes he wonʼt do something stupid. Heʼs the last one to arrive and Buck spots him the second he crosses the threshold. When he reaches the booth theyʼre sitting at, Buck almost jumps out to pull him into a hug.

“Thanks for coming.” He whispers into his ear and Eddie shivers involuntarily.

Then, heʼs crushed by another hug—this time itʼs TK which is a little surprising but Eddie returns the hug. Carlos sticks to the traditional handshake.

“Nice to finally meet the famous Eddie Diaz.” He says fondly. “Weʼve heard about you quite a lot.”

Itʼs quite dark here but Eddie notices Buck blushing anyway. Itʼs cute, he thinks.

“I hope Buck hasnʼt told any embarrassing stories.” He quips.

“Your embarrassing stories are safe with me.” Buck says very seriously, placing his hand on his chest.

“Trusting Buckley with your secrets? Youʼre either brave or stupid. Or both.” Chim laughs, sipping his drink.

“Iʼm telling Maddie. She will kick you off the couch for at least a few nights.” Buck warns him. It piques Carlosʼ interest because he asks a question, looking at the other man.

“Wait, so Chimʼs with your sister? Wow, you guys are really close.”

“Oh, you have no idea.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

The conversations go as smoothly as the drinks they keep ordering. Eddie feels buzzed and content. Heʼs talking with Carlos about their childhood in Texas. He discovers that they have much in common; itʼs a very pleasant surprise and he feels like they will be very good friends. Bobby already called the night off, saying he needs to go back to his wife—because you canʼt say no to Athena —but Hen and Chim are still there and theyʼre singing karaoke alongside Buck and TK.

Eddie keeps an eye on these two; there was a reason why Judd called them dumbass and dumbasser. Buckʼs also slightly more drunk than him so someone really should check out what heʼs doing. And that is Eddieʼs responsibility. There is definitely no hidden meaning, no other reason to glance from time to time (fine, very often) at the scene.

Itʼs their turn to sing—itʼs Ed Sheeranʼs Give Me Love —and Eddieʼs confident it was Buckʼs choice. He notices how synchronised they are, how they keep sharing casual touches, how they laugh at each other, how they look at each other during the song—

And the jealousy almost throttles him. Because this is something Buck had only with him. Heʼs never been so touchy with Chim or Albert; sure, they have hugged many times but itʼs different with Eddie. Their closeness, lack of personal space was there from the first Eddieʼs day at 118 even when theyʼve been showing off to each other. Itʼs never felt awkward or inappropriate. It was easy, natural, kind of like breathing—something that people do without even thinking about it because itʼs just part of life. Because it was Buck.

Heʼs spiraling. He needs to go outside, somewhere where he wonʼt see Buck and TK together. It doesnʼt even help him that TKʼs boyfriend is right there next to him and he doesnʼt feel annoyed, threatened. He watches them with amusement in his eyes.

“I... I need to go to the bathroom.” Eddie says quietly and he rushes out of the booth before Carlos can say something. In the middle of the road to the bathroom, he changes his mind and goes out of the pub. He needs to take a deep breath, calm down and donʼt let jealousy take over him. Itʼs not like Buckʼs his boyfriend; heʼs allowed to be close with anyone he wants to. He knows that this possessive feelings and fear of being replaced, hurt is probably irrational but it still gets to his head very easily.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

He goes back inside after a while. He orders a beer and sits in the empty booth because apparently Carlos decided to join the rest on the stage. Eddieʼs grateful for that because he doesnʼt have to explain himself, he just can sip his beer in peace.

He doesnʼt notice TK coming to the booth, heʼs too lost in thoughts.

“What are you doing here all alone? Playing a dark, brooding hero?” He hears a very amused voice when TK sits across from him.

Eddie glares at him.

“Iʼm not brooding.” He scoffs. Heʼs definitely not brooding, heʼs just... Thinking. Trying to behave as usual. It would be rude of him to just go home without saying goodbye, right? And Buck would definitely call him to check if everythingʼs alright. Itʼs better to wait a little even if heʼs sitting alone.

“If you say so.” TK shrugs but then, he continues. “You know, thereʼs no need to look at me like you want to rip my head off.”

Eddie opens mouth to say something, to deny it because heʼs sure he didnʼt look at Strand like that but TK doesnʼt let him.

“Dude, donʼt. If looks could kill, I would be already dead when we met in Texas. Well, maybe it wasnʼt that intense back then but tonight you look like you want to strangle me. Thereʼs no reason. I like Buck but heʼs my friend. Just a friend.”

Eddie looks at him like a deer caught in the spotlight. Is he really that easy to read? He feels the blush creeping up in his cheeks; heʼs a little embarrassed because he really didnʼt expect TK to be so perceptive.

“I... How did you know?” He asks, his voice filled with uncertainty. He doesnʼt try to deny it anymore, TK wouldnʼt buy this bullshit anyway.

“Besides that I-wanna-kill-you look? ” TK laughs and then, he takes the water left on the table. “You look at him like the sun shines out of his ass. You were so focused on him that you barely noticed everyone else tonight. If I asked Hen or Chim about it, Iʼm sure they would say this is your normal behaviour. And you kept touching him like...” He trails off for a while, biting his lip. “You know... When I saw you and Buck for the first time, I was sure you two were together.”

Eddieʼs speechless; he’s mindlessly tapping his leg, looking at TK but not really seeing him. He’s silent for a few moments, but TK’s patient, he doesn’t rush him to talk.

“It’s… Complicated.” Eddie sighs heavily. He hasn’t told anyone about it but he doesn’t know if he can keep all of these emotions bottled up any longer. Maybe the fact he’s not entirely sober helps. And the fact it’s TK he’s talking to. “We’re friends. Best friends even. I… You know, he’s been there for me and he’s got my back since the day I arrived at the station. He’s the best friend I’ve ever had and I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him. I don’t know how and when it happened but it just… Did? The thing is… I was panicking at first, I even tried to get over him by dating Ana. She’s—she was Christopher’s teacher. She was nice and sweet but I’ve kept thinking about Buck even when I was on a date with her. Even when I was kissing her, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. It’s embarrassing, I know.”

He’s thankful that TK’s not interrupting him, that he actually pays attention to him. He notices the resemblance between him and Buck. Both of them have a personality of a golden retriever and they tend to do sometimes very stupid and reckless things. But after all, they’re so easygoing and sweet, it’s very easy to love them. Eventually, he goes on with his confession. “You know, I was jealous when I saw you two because you’re awfully… Handsy. You can understand each other without even talking. I know you have Carlos and that you two are serious but… I can’t help it, it’s stronger than me. And I can’t tell him I’m in love, I can’t destroy our relationship. I can’t do it because Chris would lose him too and he’s already lost one parent. Besides, Buck’s in love with someone anyway.”

He ends his monologue and hides his face in his hands. He definitely feels better after saying it out loud but it’s still a little bit awkward.

“And here I’ve thought Judd calls you Hollywood because of the looks but now I’m sure it’s because of how dumb you are.” TK says boldly.

Eddie raises his head to gaze upon his friend. There’s a very amused grin on his face and he looks like he’s refraining himself from laughing out loud.

“You really have no clue, don’t you?” TK asks. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh at you but it’s so funny how oblivious and blind two people can be.”

Eddie scowls.

“Are you gonna keep mocking me or you’re gonna tell me what you mean?”

“Fine.” TK chuckles. “Have you ever considered that Buck might be in love with you? I know that he told you, not directly, but he told you about it. I guess you didn’t figure it out.”

“He didn’t—” Eddie protests without hesitation but he stops when recalls their conversation after Buck told the team about TK and Carlos coming to LA. He mentioned being in love with someone and not wanting to tell the person about his feelings but Eddie didn’t even think that he could be talking about him. “You sure… He was talking about me?”

He looks at TK with hope; he desperately wants it to be true.

“I’m sure.” The younger man reassures. “He’s in love with you as much as you are. Oh, speaking of the devil.” He mutters, seeing Buck going in their direction.

Eddie rapidly turns his head only to see his best friend settling down next to him. His face is slightly flushed, hair disheveled and there’s a wide smile on his lips.

“Dude, I know you’re into Texans but I think one of them is enough, don’t you think?” He asks TK playfully.

“Don’t worry, Eddie’s all yours.” TK replies, smiling mischievously and he winks at Eddie. “I’m sure Eddie’s more into cute, blue-eyed blondes anyway.”

And then, he flees out of the booth, leaving them both alone. Buck raises one eyebrow, looking suspiciously at his best friend.

“Blue-eyed blondes, huh?” He asks very intelligently. Eddie’s sure his cheeks and neck are red by now and it’s very noticeable.

“Y-Yeah. He’s right.”

“Interesting. Neither Shannon nor Ana were blondes.” Buck points out, his voice very teasing.

“But you are.”

It makes Buck blushing furiously and Eddie thinks it’s the cutest thing he saw this evening. Suddenly, he notices how close they are, how their bodies are pressed together, how blue Buck’s eyes are and how soft his lips are.

“So… You’re into blondes now?” Buck whispers, not tearing his gaze away from him, even for a second.

“Been into for a while now.”

“It’d make everything easier if I knew about this, I’d definitely do this sooner.”

Buck makes the first move and he closes the space between them. He gently brushes his lips like he doesn’t want to overwhelm him. But Eddie doesn’t want to back off. He’s the one who deepens the kiss, he’s the one who slides his tongue into his mouth, causing him to quietly moan.

“Do you think we could sneak off and go to my house maybe?” Eddie asks when they break apart, panting heavily.

“Dude, TK and Carlos are staying at my apartment, I can’t just sneak off.” Buck laughs. “I need to at least give them the keys if I’m not supposed to go back to my place tonight.”

“Then what are you waiting for? Just give them the keys and we can go.” Eddie pouts and he sounds so needy, it makes Buck giggle.

At some point, they get up and approach their friends who’re standing by the bar and ordering new drinks.

“Look who decided to join us!” Hen chuckles and she wants to say something else but she’s cut off by the Chim’s laughing loudly.

“I’m not sure if they are joining or leaving us.” TK smirks and Carlos nudges him softly to not to meddle.

“Actually, we were thinking about leaving if you don’t mind. I can give you the keys to my apartment.” Buck offers sheepishly.

“Just give us the keys, we’ll manage. You can go with your Texan.” TK says but then he adds, pointing a finger in Eddie’s direction. “But I need to meet Christopher before I go back to Austin.”

“I think we can arrange something. Tomorrow afternoon maybe?” Eddie suggests.

“Then we’re all set. Now, stop talking and get a room already!”

When Buck finally gives TK his keys, they say their goodbyes and order an Uber to Eddie’s house.

The ride is quick but quiet. They don’t really talk but the silence between them is not uncomfortable—it’s the opposite of it. They have to talk about their feelings eventually but they know they’ll have the time to do it. They enter the house and the second Buck closes the door, he’s slammed against the nearest wall. Suddenly, they’re kissing again; Eddie pushes his hips forward and it causes Buck to spread out his legs a little bit.

Eddie’s so glad Chris is at Abuela’s house because it means they have the whole night only for themselves—and they can do whatever they want to.

“Bed.” Buck growls when Eddie bites his lip and starts to unbuckle his belt.

“Someone’s impatient.” The older man teases.

“Said the guy who dragged me out of the meeting with our friends to have sex with me.” The blonde replies wryly.

“Just shut up, Buck.”

“Make me.”

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

Eddie slowly wakes up when the sun peeks through the curtains and shines on his face. His head hurts a little—well, heʼs not in his twenties anymore and he wasnʼt counting his beers last night—and he feels the weight on his chest. He needs a second to register that itʼs Buck; he sleeps very peacefully, completely nestled to Eddie. His headʼs on the place where Eddieʼs heart is, one arm around his waist; thereʼs a gingerish stubble on his cheeks and his blonde curls are perfectly messy. Itʼs a wonderful sight—and he wants to wake up like this every morning... Maybe minus a hangover.

He doesnʼt even notice how long heʼs staring at Buck like that but he doesnʼt really care. Eventually, Buck wakes up too and he raises his head a little. He seems a little confused but the expression disappears when he notices heʼs on top of Eddie and the manʼs grinning.

“Hello, sunshine.” Eddie says and he shifts a little to be able to pull his friend closer to properly kiss him. Itʼs kinda gross because they smell like yesterdayʼs beers and they havenʼt brushed their teeth but neither of them care.

“I assume you do remember last night... No regrets?” Buck asks. His tone is cheery, playful as always but Eddie can see the uncertainty in his eyes.

“Only one. That I was a coward for so long because we could have had it all much sooner.” He answers very seriously, looking directly into Buckʼs eyes. He wants him to believe in every word he says. “I know we hadnʼt exactly talked last night... But I donʼt want this to be a one night stand. Not with you. I want... More. Everything. I mean weʼve already been a couple for quite some time. You practically live in my house, youʼre Chrisʼ second dad and youʼve been my rock since the day weʼve met. We just... Havenʼt done the sexy part of the relationship.”

“Until last night.” Buck points out.

“Yeah... Point taken. So if you want to take it slow, we can take it slow. We can date like people usually do or you can already move in and take my closet, my bed and everything because youʼve already taken my heart.”

“If you think that your offer to move in is getting you out of asking me on a date then you’re terribly wrong, Diaz.” Buck teases and winks at his friend. “You need to romance me a little.”

“God, youʼre such a dork.” Eddie says fondly. He feels so damn happy and content because he can really have everything he wanted.

“You love it.”

“I do. Now, get your ass up. We need to pick up Chris from Abuela at some point. We have dinner with TK and Carlos later.” Eddie sighs because heʼd rather stay all day in bed with Buck—and maybe tell him some of the fantasies he had in his head—but the reality calls anyway.

“Are you sure you want me to pick up Chris with you? I mean, we donʼt have to do it together, I can go to my apartment and—”

“Buck. Iʼm sure. Itʼs not like we havenʼt done this before. I want to tell him about us too. I donʼt want to lie to him because I did it when I dated Ana and it didnʼt end well. Besides, heʼll be thrilled to see us together. Hell, he wants us together. He literally told me last week that I need to buy glasses if I canʼt see that you love me too.”

Buck looks at him with amusement and he laughs heartily.

“Heʼs a smart kid. And he definitely didnʼt get it from his father.”

Eddie scoffs.

“Youʼre really lucky that I love you that much because otherwise you wouldnʼt get away with saying stuff like this.”

Buckʼs smile is almost blinding.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

They get up, eventually. They go to the shower together to “save the time and water” but it turns into another long making out session. They eat breakfast (made by Buck) and they finally go to Abuela to get Christopher.

“Edmundo, youʼre late.” They hear in the second Abuela opens the door. Sheʼs a little surprised to see not only his grandson but also his best friend.

She notices the big ass hickey on Buckʼs collarbone thatʼs exposed because heʼs wearing Eddieʼs Henley and raises her eyebrow.

“Now I understand why youʼre late.” She smirks which causes them to blush. “Anyway, itʼs nice to see you again, Evanito. I hope I get to see you more often.” She adds and then embraces both of them in a hug.

“You will, Abuela, I promise.” Eddie says honestly. He wants to add something but he hears an excited voice from the hallway.

“Dad!” Christopher shouts as he goes to the door to greet Eddie. “Bucky?” He asks when he notices the other man standing next to his dad.

“Hey, Superman!” Buck says, kneeling down to hug the kid.

“I didnʼt know youʼll be there. Are you coming home with us?”

“Yeah, buddy, Iʼm coming with you.”

Christopherʼs smile only gets bigger.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

“Chris? What would you say if Buck were living with us?” Eddie asks when theyʼre at home. Buckʼs making Abuelaʼs famous enchiladas with Christopher (none of the Diaz siblings have gotten the recipe despite asking for it a countless times; Buck asked once and Abuela happily gave it to him) and Eddieʼs only an observer. He loves watching those two interacting, spending time together. He loves how easily Buck has stepped into a co-parent role, how fast and hard he has fallen in love with Chris, how good he is with kids in general. Heʼs amazed by it almost every time he sees them together. He wouldnʼt have found someone better to be with.

“Buckyʼs moving with us? Iʼve thought it wouldnʼt happen!” Chris replies. The corners of his lips are curling into a smile but before it breaks into a full grin, he asks. “But does that mean you are dating and we wonʼt see miss Flores or someone else anymore?”

Buck looks at Eddie with a mischievous smile and mouths told you, heʼs a smart kid.

“Yeah, kiddo, no more miss Flores or any other women. Itʼs gonna be only the three of us.”

It seems to be a very satisfying answer for Christopher—he just nods and goes back to adding all ingredients to the enchilada sauce.

When everything’s almost ready, Christopher goes to his room to change his shirt because he spilled the sauce on it and they are left alone. Eddie doesnʼt waste any time and comes closer to be able to kiss Buck. He thinks it may be a problem to keep his hands off his best friend but they will figure it out too. Eventually.

“I think I can get used to this.” Buck says when they stop to take a breath.

“To what? Cooking with Chris?” Eddie teases.

Buck only huffs but then he smiles anyway because cooking with Christopher is definitely on top of his favourite things to do. “Yep, definitely. He is my favourite Diaz after all.”

“Then Iʼm in second place I guess?”

“You wish. Thereʼs also Abuela and Tia Pepa... Maybe even your sisters.” Buck grins. “You have very strong competition.”

“I think I may have some tricks up my sleeve to change your mind then.” Eddie states and heʼs ready to show them to Buck but the doorbell rings. He sighs heavily. “Guess you just have to wait to see them then.”

“Canʼt wait.”

“Hi Buck. Fancy seeing you here.” TK says with a very wide smile on his lips. “Iʼm guessing last night went well then.”

“Well... Yeah? Thanks to someone who was meddling just a little bit.”

Carlos rolls his eyes but he doesnʼt look even slightly irritated.

“Please, donʼt boost his already big ego, he was talking last night about changing his career to be a matchmaker.”

“Matchmaker?” Buck raises his brow. “Sounds interesting.”

“Carlos, we should really keep our boyfriends apart, itʼs dangerous to let them use their brain cells together. If they even have them.” They hear Eddieʼs amused voice and he appears right behind Buck. The blonde blushes at the word boyfriends. “But come on in, weʼre all ready.”

“We brought a six pack and a gift for Christopher.” Carlos adds, lifting up the beers.

“Oh, Chris will be thrilled. Heʼs already so excited to meet you two.”

“Weʼre excited to meet him too, Buck has told us so many things about Christopher, I feel like I already know him.” TK explains when they go inside.

“Bucky was talking about me?” Christopher peeks in the kitchen shyly. He sounds quite surprised.

“Yes, he did. And itʼs very nice to finally meet you. Buck couldnʼt stop talking about you. He didnʼt even talk so much about your dad I think.”

“Because my dad is very boring sometimes and heʼs all grumpy.” Christopher shrugs, looking apologetically at his dad. “Sorry dad but thatʼs the truth.”

“When did you become so sassy, huh? But I guess youʼre right. But... This is TK and this is Carlos.” Eddie introduces his friend to his son.

“And we know youʼre very interested in space so we got you a little gift.” Carlos adds, handing Chris over a package.

“Thank you.” Christopher says simply and puts it on the floor to unpack. “Whatʼs this?” He asks curiously.

“Oh, let me help you unpack it but maybe not here? We don't want to make a mess now.” Carlos proposes and Chris immediately agrees.

They go to the living room together and Buck sees with how much fondness TK looks at them.

“Carlos seems pretty good with kids.”

“He is. Heʼs fantastic. Maybe one day weʼll think about it.” TK replies thoughtfully.

“Oh, really? You two would be amazing dads.” Eddie says honestly, putting up the plates on the table. TK looks a little stunned.

“Never really thought about it too much earlier. But, anyway, howʼs my favourite couple? Because you two are a couple now, right?” TK eyes both of them carefully.

“Buckʼs moving in. Donʼt know when yet but Iʼm planning to make it as soon as we can.” Eddie announces proudly.

“Wow you really donʼt waste your time. So should we expect an invitation for the wedding next year?” TK laughs.

“... Maybe?” They both reply in sync.

“Well, weʼre doing it backwards. We started by raising Christopher together instead of just simply dating each other. So maybe we should marry each other soon. Iʼd marry him even now.” Buck states and winks at his boyfriend.

“Something tells me that the 118 would be mad at us for weeks. If they wouldnʼt kill us first for not inviting them to the wedding.” Eddie points out.

“I hate that youʼre right. They would totally kill us. But dinnerʼs ready and boys are probably starving so letʼs feed them first.”

The dinner is excellent, the conversation goes smoothly and Chris talks about his gift—an International Space Station Lego set—with so much excitement, they donʼt even dare to interrupt him. Buck and TK even offer to help him build it later. They eat a dessert and then, Eddie and Carlos settle on the couch, beers in hands and Buck and TK sit on the floor alongside Christopher and they discuss how to build the space station. Eddie canʼt tear away his gaze from Buck who looks so happy and excited to play with his—their —son and agrees to everything Christopher says.

“You two really fit together.” Carlos says quietly because he doesnʼt want to distract boys from work. “And Iʼm glad you were able to finally talk about your feelings. I must admit, I was pretty invested in your story when TK was talking about it. I really hoped you two would figure it out somehow.”

“Can you believe I was really jealous yesterday? I was sure Buck and TK were flirting and.. God, I was so mad at you for a second why you donʼt even react, why are you so cool about it. And... Yeah, I was stupid because I was sure he was into TK.” Eddie sighs because heʼs still embarrassed about it, he still canʼt believe he was so anxious that Buck might be in love with someone else.

“Oh, you probably havenʼt seen the way he looks at you. Itʼs really something. And TK was really invested in—and I quote—bringing these two lovesick idiots together. They were never flirting. Not seriously at least.”

“Yeah, I know... I... I really hope heʼll be happy with me. But Iʼve heard your relationship is getting more serious.”

“Yeah, well... We live together now so itʼs a pretty big step for both of us. We havenʼt killed each other so Iʼm taking it as a good sign. I donʼt know whatʼs next. Maybe a wedding but I need to be sure TK will say yes and wonʼt freak out about it.” Carlos sighs, knowing that TK may be still cautious about the whole wedding thing but he definitely wants to try it anyway.

“He mentioned earlier something about you two having a kid so I think heʼs taking it very seriously too.” Eddie reassures him.

They both look at his boyfriends who are completely focused on building a space station with Christopher and itʼs very heart-warming sight. “I donʼt think he would say something like that if he didnʼt mean it. Besides, heʼs a lot like Buck and I bet he loves kids as much as him. And I need to add that Christopher is not really a kid who trusts easily but he clearly has so much fun with TK. I wouldnʼt worry too much if I were you. You two really fit together too.”

“Yeah, we do. TK was annoyingly stubborn at first and he didnʼt want to admit that itʼs more than just a hookup. Now weʼre living together.” Carlos laughs, looking softly at TK who sticked out the tip of his tongue and visibly tries to concentrate. “I must say, this is a really nice trip. Glad I could meet TKʼs friends and just... Let myself relax a little bit. Something tells me ifʼs not our last visit in LA, though.”

“I bet.” Eddie hums in agreement. “You can visit LA as many times as you want to. We will probably visit you in Texas too. I have to properly introduce Buck to my family one day so we can definitely do a quick trip to Austin then.”

“Weʼll be happy to see you. Captain S—Owen—will be thrilled to see you. He was disappointed he couldnʼt go with us, he wanted to see Hen again and meet your captain.”

“Yeah, he was whining all the time since we told him weʼre going to LA.” TK adds suddenly. Heʼs still focused on building the space station but Carlos and Eddie stopped talking quietly and now he hears what theyʼre saying. “Mateo was disappointed too, he wanted to visit his cousin. Marvin? Or something like that.”

“We can organise something bigger so everyone can be there.” Buck agrees. “Eds, we should definitely tell Bobby about it. I donʼt care if itʼs here or in Austin, I can definitely organise it.”

“I have no doubts.” Eddie says fondly and then looks at their guests. “You shouldʼve seen him when he organised a Christmas party for us all with help from Athena. We were all working and our kids were so disappointed by it but Buck basically rescued everything. That was really amazing.”

“Really? You didnʼt even mention that!” TK scoffs. “But nice to know, maybe Iʼll hire you to organise my wedding with Carlos since youʼre so good at this stuff.”

“Oh, I donʼt know. Maybe Iʼd work with Carlos because heʼs so sweet and nice but you? I bet youʼll be a bridezilla.”

TK only throws at Buck a piece of Lego in response, followed by the laugh of both Eddie and Carlos.

━━━━━━━━━━ × ━━━━━━━━━━

Itʼs almost 10pm when TK and Carlos decide to go back to Buckʼs apartment. Christopher already fell asleep but he managed to build the space station with Buck and TK and he was really proud of it, just like both of his helpers.

“Dude, your kid is really amazing. I mean, I donʼt remember the last time when I had so much fun—sorry, babe—and Iʼm really gonna miss him.” TK admits and thereʼs so much honesty in his voice, nobody even questions it.

“Heʼs gonna miss you too, if it helps.” Eddie tells him, grinning softly. “Both of you. But youʼre gonna see him soon. At least I think so.”

“I take your word for it.” TK warns him.

“Well, you can always face time with us.”

TKʼs face instantly lights up and he hugs Eddie.

“I will miss you too, Hollywood.”

Eddie only rolls his eyes.

“Hey, you two big saps, you will see each other tomorrow because weʼre gonna drive you to the airport before our shift.” Buck announces.

“Fineeee.” TK sighs dramatically. “But I think our Uberʼs here so weʼre gonna leave you alone. It was really nice to spend more time with you.”

“Likewise.”

They say their goodbyes eventually and when TK and Carlos are already in the car, Buck takes Eddieʼs hand and smiles widely.

“It was really an eventful 24 hours.” He says.

“It was. Now we only have to prepare ourselves for tomorrowʼs shift. I bet Hen and Chim will be insufferable.”

Buck groans.

“Ugh, they will be. Maybe we should be insufferable too?”

“Buckley, do you have something particular in mind?” Eddie asks, watching his boyfriend carefully. Maybe other people wouldnʼt notice it but heʼs Eddie and he knows Buck too well. He notices that mischievous look in his eyes and heʼs sure Buckʼs up to something.

“I have a few ideas, Diaz.”

“Care to share them with me?”

“Always.”

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on-maars · 3 years

Text

Find My Way Home (Back To You)

Alright I wrote a post Eddie Begins episode fic and I really hope you’ll like it :)

Read it on AO3

Eddie sighs and turns around for what might be the tenth time in the past two hours.

He can’t sleep. He can’t sleep without being back there again. He can’t sleep without stopping the nightmares. Not about the war. He’s had his fair share of night terrors about the war, but lately the nightmares have taken another direction. He doesn’t dream of being the target of a thousand snipers anymore. He dreams of that moment. He dreams of being back there again, buried in the ground, thirty feet of wet earth above him, trapped, without any way of getting back to his son, without any way of getting back to his family. It’s suffocating, and Eddie often wakes up soaking wet, his hair sticking to his forehead, his sheet drenched in sweat. Drenched in sweat, and tears. His tears.

He can’t sleep and he tried everything. Every method he can think of. Every method his mother used to teach him when he was scared and alone at night, suffering from insomnia. He tried some breathing exercises his therapist showed him the week before, tried taking a walk around the neighborhood to clear his head and take his mind off things, he tried reading a book and even went through some meditations videos on YouTube that Buck recommended to him a while back. But nothing is working. His mind keeps sending him back to that place. To the well.

Eddie turns around again and lets his eyes fall on his alarm clock as it reads 2:49am. Eddie sighs and presses his hands to his face, apprehending the 24 hours shift waiting for him in the early hours of the morning. Not necessarily because of the fatigue. After all it wouldn’t be the first time Eddie gets through an awfully long shift with the 118 with only a few hours of sleep in his system.

No, he’s only apprehending it because he knows, deep down, that he’s so far from being in the right state of mind to face the difficulties of his job. He feels more restless, more fidgety, less focused than usual. And if there is no doubt in Eddie’s mind that the 118 is going to notice his mood swings. And if they notice, then he’s going to need to explain. Explain the extent of how messed-up he is in the head. Explain how the war still terrorized him sometimes at night. Explain how tight his throat is ever since he’s made it out of that well. And that’s a conversation he’s not ready to face.

Eddie looks up at the ceiling and gropes around in the dark until his right hand finds his phone. He knows scrolling mindlessly the news is only going to keep his brain more awake but he doesn’t find it in him to care anymore. He unlocks his phone and frowns when he notices an unseen message from his sister in his inbox. The message is short, but it catches Eddie’s attention.

“Isn’t he your friend Buck?!”

There is a link just underneath it and when Eddie clicks on it, his breath catches in his throat and his heart starts pounding hard against his chest. It’s a video. A video of that day. A video of the rig, collapsing, and burying him under thirty feet of earth in the process. Only the video doesn’t show only that. It also shows his coworkers’ reaction. It also shows Buck.

Buck

Buck, who collapses on the ground and completely falls to pieces. Buck, who screams his name and starts digging the earth with his bare hands. Buck, who bursts into tears and whose face is contorted with fear, rage and pain. Eddie watches him as he continues calling out his name in agony, he watches him as Bobby needs to physically restrain him to stop him from digging, and Eddie swears he can feel his heart cracked open at the sight.

The scene is devastating, heartbreaking, and the last seconds of the video only shows Buck, sitting on the ground, his head down, tears rolling down his face, as the rain continues pouring down on him.

By the time Eddie finishes watching the video, his hands are shaking and the room is spinning. His whole body is tense, buzzing with a nervous energy and Eddie closes his eyes fiercely but he can’t get the images out of his head. How can he? How can he when he had to sit through and watch his best-friend having a complete breakdown in a video with more than a million views? How can he when until then, he was so far up his own ass not to notice that Buck was hurting too? Not to notice that he wasn't the only one who ended up traumatized by this day?

He sits back straight on his bed, and leans his back against the headboard, running both of his hands through his hair a few times, ignoring how his heart pulses in his head, making it hurt.

He takes his phone in his hand and gets up, stepping out of his room and going down the stairs until he reaches the living-room. Here, he lets himself fall on the couch, rubbing his temples with his fingers, his eyes closed. In vain. It’s no use. It’s no use trying to get his breathing back to normal while the only thing he really wants is to see his best-friend with his own two eyes and make sure he’s okay.

“Can you come over?” He sends. It’s short and vague, but Eddie knows Buck keeps his phone in sound mode at all times just in case this kind of emergencies come up.

But is it an emergency? Eddie asks himself as he brings his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. It’s not. Not really. But Buck’s answer still comes after just a few seconds.

“Be there in 15. You okay? Christopher?”

“We’re okay. Just need to see you.”

Eddie jumps out of the couch and starts pacing back and forth in the living-room, not knowing what to do with himself. He squats down and starts picking up every Lego bricks lying around on the carpet, on the coffee table under the sofa. Christopher was in the middle of building a (more than unstable) house before heading to bed and he seemed so tired from his school day Eddie didn’t have the heart to ask him to tidy. He’s in the middle of retrieving a brick which ended up under the carpet when he hears the distinct sound of someone opening the front door.

He whirls his head around and finds himself face to face with Buck who looks around the living-room in alarm, his eyes wide. His hair is disheveled and his shoes are mismatched and Eddie almost feels bad for waking him up in the middle of the night while they both have a 24 hours shift waiting for them in a few hours. His best-friend’s face softens when his eyes fall on him, and Eddie doesn’t waste any time to close the gap separating them and wrapping his arms around his neck to hold him close.

“Evan Buckley I swear to god you’re going to be the death of me.” He says, not thinking twice before burying his face in the crook of his best-friend’s neck. Buck seems taken aback for a few seconds, but he doesn’t question it and reciprocate the embrace with just as much vigor. “I’m sorry.” Eddie eventually says, grabbing his tee-shirt with his right hand.

“You’re sorry?” Buck repeats, his voiced filled with confusion. “About what?” He adds.

“God I’ve been so far up my own ass these past few days, haven’t I?” Eddie asks, taking a step back and placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, following his gaze until he’s sure Buck looks at him in the eye. His best-friend seems reluctant at first, almost as if he already knows where the conversation is going, but then he finally meets his gaze and Eddie’s look is so intense and he’s watching him with so much attention something in his face just breaks. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Tell you what, Eds?” Buck asks, but from the way his voice breaks, Eddie knows it’s just a way for him to try and take the conversation elsewhere.

“Buck.” Eddie says, and it’s a warning. We’re having that conversation whether you like it or not.

“Eddie, just- Don’t, alright?” Buck starts. “It’s okay. You’re okay. It’s all that matters.”

“I saw the video.” Eddie says, taking another step backwards until he sits on a kitchen chair, running his right hand through his hair.

“What video?” Buck says, his voice small, but sighs and looks down when Eddie maintains eye-contact. “Took you long enough.” He only adds, leaning against the fridge. “It was literally everywhere on the news. Big headlines too.” He says, letting out a humorless laugh.

“Buck-”

“But again, I’spose it’s fun to see a firefighter completely losing it after his best-friend has been buried thirty feet underground.” Buck cuts in, his voice hollow. “I guess it ‘entertains’ people just fine”

“Buck-” Eddie starts, but his friend is faster.

“As if I want to relive that moment, you know?” Buck goes on and his voice is louder now, more aggressive. “As if one time wasn’t enough.”

“Buck, I-”

“Eddie, you cut the damn line!” He exclaims and Eddie jumps with surprise at how raw and demanding his tone is. “You cut the damn line!” He repeats and a tear rolls down his left cheek. “And you know what the worst part is? The worst part is that I can’t even blame you for it! You wanted to save that kid… I mean, how can I blame you for wanting to save that kid, Eddie? I can’t. I would be a fucking hypocrite if I did, man. Cause I would have done the same thing if the roles were reversed.”

“It doesn’t mean you can’t be mad.” Eddie says, keeping his eyes down, incapable of meeting his best-friend’s gaze. “It doesn’t mean you can’t be angry.” He adds. “Hell, I know I would be.”

“I just- Eddie, did you ever stop for a second to imagine what it was like for me? I was pulling you out Eds. I was pulling you out and then the weight was just- the weight was just gone. You were gone.” He says through gritted teeth and Eddie darts his eyes towards him for just a second, but that’s still enough time for him to see the expression of complete agony and pure heartbreak on his best-friend’s face. Eddie looks away just as fast and sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

“But that’s not even the worst part, oh no.” Buck goes on and Eddie knows this one is on a roll. He’s determined and he won’t stop until he got everything off his chest. “ Because then this damn rig just collapsed and I- I couldn’t get you out, I- You were… You were buried, Eds. You were buried and I swear to god I would have dug the whole thing with my bare hands if I had to.”

“I know you would’ve.” Eddie only says, staring at Buck, his eyes filled with the tears he’s been trying to hold back for the past fifteen minutes. “I know you would’ve.”

“I didn’t give up on you.” Buck answers, as if he’s trying to justify his actions in a courtroom. “You’ve got to know that, alright?” He repeats. “I didn’t give up on you. Even when people were trying to convince me that there was no way you would have survived that, I didn’t- I didn’t give up on you.”

“Hey, hey, I know.” Eddie instantly reassures him, getting up and closing the gap between them. “I know.” He repeats, cupping Buck’s cheeks with his hands. “You didn’t give up.”

“I didn’t give up.” Buck nods, his lips quivering.

“Buck, do you think- do you think I’m mad at you because you didn’t try hard enough?” Eddie manages to articulate, his fingers playing with the roots of Buck’s hair. “How could you have tried any harder?” Eddie adds, letting out a nervous laugh. “For Christ’s sake Evan, you told me yourself you were ready to dig the whole thing by hands. There’s nothing you could have done. You hear me?”

Buck frantically nods and Eddie sighs, wrapping his right arm around his neck to pull him forward. Buck’s whole body tenses and it’s only when his shoulders start shaking that Eddie realizes his best-friend is full-on sobbing against him, his tears wetting his white tee-shirt. Buck rests his forehead on his shoulder and Eddie simply runs his left hand through his hair while the other traces small patterns on his back, holding him tight. He presses his lips on his hair, closing his eyes fiercely for a few seconds while throwing his head backwards, looking up at the ceiling.

“I’m sorry.” Buck says against him. “Here I am again, making the whole thing about me while you’re the one who’ve been buried underground.”

“Don’t be stupid Buck, I’m the one who should apologize here. I was so focused on my pain and the nightmares that I-”

“Nightmares?” Buck whirls his head up to meet his eyes. “You have nightmares about the well?” He asks, his eyes full of concern, and Eddie lets out an incredulous laugh.

“Yeah but that’s not the point, Buck.” He says, dismissing his concern with a hand’s gesture. “I should have seen you were hurting. I’m sorry.” He adds. “And yes I have nightmares but Buck you need to know you’re the only reason I got out. You and Christopher? I couldn’t have done it without you guys. Wouldn’t have done it. But I promised myself I’ll always find my way back home. So I did.”

Eddie cradles his chin with his left hand, forcing him to look up.

“That… That was sappy as hell, man.” Buck tries and Eddie snorts, placing his hand on his cheek to make him look away.

“Says the one who was ready to dig thirty feet of wet earth with his bare hands.” He says playfully and then Buck does this thing again where he looks down with a shy smile and Eddie’s heart just melts at the sight.

When Buck lifts his gaze again, their lips are only separated by a few inches of space and Eddie’s head is spinning. He stays there, motionless, not knowing whether he should finally gives in to years of pining and unresolved tension. But then, Buck’s eyes dart towards his lips and all his good sense goes up in smoke. Eddie looks at him for permission and when Buck nods, he places his hand on the back of his neck and presses their lips together. It doesn’t last long. It’s brief, and when Eddie takes a step back, Buck’s lips chase his own a second time and he only smiles and complies happily.

This time, the kiss is more heated and Buck’s hands find their way on the back of Eddie’s neck, biting his lower lip to demand access to his mouth. Eddie smiles against his mouth and runs both of his hands through his hair, bringing him closer. This earns him a small whimper from Buck and Eddie only kisses him harder, pressing his best-friend’s body against the fridge and sliding his hand underneath his tee-shirt.

“God I can’t believe we waited three years to do that.” Buck says Eddie huffs out a laugh against his lips.

“Well I mean you were a bit slow on the uptake.” Eddie teases him.

“Oh fuck off.” Buck taps him on the head playfully. “You know I couldn’t just- I had to be sure.”

“I know.” Eddie says, his voice soft.

“I couldn’t do the first move. I had to wait for… I had to wait for you to do it. Even if I knew that you- because I knew. Of course I knew. But-”

“Hey.” Eddie cuts him off by cupping his cheeks with his hands. “I know.” He repeats. “Alright then Evan. Let’s get you to bed.”

“Lead the way, Edmundo.”

“Not my name.” Eddie says with a smile, taking his hand in his to guide him towards the bedroom.

“Sorry. Eduardo.”

“Still not my name, man."

"Diaz?"

"That's it, you’re sleeping on the damn couch, Buckley.” Eddie warns but the smile on his face betrays him.

“Really? You would make me sleep on the couch? The guy who was ready to dig 30 feet of wet earth with his bare han-”

“Oh my god will you shut up?” Eddie whispers loudly, being careful not to wake up Christopher fast asleep in the adjoining room.

“Make me.” Buck says, a hint of amusement in his voice and Eddie?

Well Eddie wastes no time to crash their lips together another time.

#buddie #buddie fic #9-1-1 #Eddie Begins #Evan Buckley #Eddie diaz #911 #buck x eddie

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princessfbi · 3 years

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I dunno if you got this already but eddie for the ask thing? I love him so much🥺❤️

My Sweet Eddie Diaz

How I feel about this character

I love him! I love how complex he is! He’s assertive and collected but sweet and insecure. I love how he’s got the duality of being uncertain of his place in a relationship but at the same time very sure of his role in a relationship if that makes any sense. I love soft!Eddie, petty!Eddie, and all the good and bad parts in-between.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Buck but also Eddie is one of the characters where I will settle for just happiness. He deserves to be happy. I have a lot of mixed feelings about Shannon but one of my things that really gets me is her continual push for wanting Eddie to be her partner. But the thing is, I don’t think she was willing to be his. She constantly pushed him and then when he would finally push back (ie the kitchen scene where she asked him to take a trip to LA after he got back, the bombarding him at his work) she would act like he was this unreasonable monster. And I get her point because Eddie was not listening to her when she was trying to communicate her needs to him. But I still don’t think he’s entirely to blame for the way the relationship ended up. Shannon’s death broke Eddie but I think Shannon broke him a little before then too.

I also think that Eddie is incredibly lonely. You really see it when he is left to pick up the pieces of the broken salad bowl. I don’t think Eddie ever truly had someone in his corner. Someone who supported Eddie to support Eddie. Not Eddie, the single father. Not Eddie, the war hero. Just Eddie.

So, I really just want Eddie to be happy with someone who will love him for him.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

I love his relationship with Bobby. I think, like with Buck, Bobby serves as this very important figure in Eddie’s life. I think Eddie was raised to not seek validation from anyone yet he was given constant judgement instead. So for Eddie finding someone who not only validates him but then accepts him even when he falls is so important. Bobby serves as a real safe space for Eddie. Eddie is openly vulnerable with Bobby in a way he isn’t even with Buck, his best friend.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I actually don’t think the fight club craziness was out of character. I think Eddie was brought up to bury all the “soft” feelings he had deep inside and pretend they didn’t exist but that isn’t sustainable. We’ve seen him sort of crash into a breakdown at least three times now. I think it all goes back to what I was saying a while ago about Buck and his appearance and how it reflects his grasp of control (or even what I said in my post about TK and the shoving of Carlos). I think Eddie at that time was spiraling and feeling completely out of control. I think his self worth was down the toilet.

I don’t think Eddie was fighting to hit someone. I think Eddie was fighting to be hit.

I think all the aches and pains and bruises from fighting served as a distraction whenever his mind would drift back to Shannon and Buck and everything else that was out of his control. If he focused on that then he didn’t have to worry about focusing on anything else. Because he was brought up not feeling like he was allowed to break down. Even when he was talking to Bobby, he breaks down but you can see he’s fighting it. He’s trying to hold back all these “soft feelings” and no one can get him to let go of them except himself. It served as a self punishment but it was also a way for him to exhale. The fighting served as a release and in his case, he found willing punching bags.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I’d like to see Eddie breakdown. Like really and truly breakdown. I want to see him show that “soft” side with the people around him like Buck or Hen or whoever and just crumble. It’s great to see him with Bobby but I think that’s only a glimpse of the crack. I think Eddie crying to someone is a sign of his complete trust and I want to just see him unload that burden he’s constantly carrying.

Give Me A Character and I’ll Break Them Down

#Eddie Diaz #Bobby Nash #Evan 'Buck' Buckley #911 on fox #character ask game #ask game #anon #answered #writing talk #Shannon Diaz

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canonicallyobserving911 · 1 year

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Buck & Eddie: Buck self-sabotaged his sperm donation

So...the audience is supposed to believe that Researcher Buck, who commits to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING before he thoroughly researches it, didn’t research everything he could about sperm donations right after Connor and Kameron said they wanted him to be their sperm donor? It’s UNBELIEVABLE because if he didn’t do an extensive amount of research on the topic, then it would be OOC for him. Let’s review several examples of topics that Buck has researched before he made a decision to act on them.

In 3x8 “Malfunction” when Bobby told the team about his ice-skating past, Buck told them, after Bobby walked away, “We’ll Google for photos later”. Not only did he search Google for pictures; he also found Heidi Shotsky, Bobby’s junior pairs ice-skating partner. He got a picture of Bobby from her, had the picture blown up into a cardboard cutout and took it to work so that he could prank Bobby in front of the team. When Bobby asked him where he got it, he told him “Heidi says hi. She’s going to email you later. She didn’t want to ruin the surprise”.

In 3x12 “Fools” Buck told Eddie that he was overcorrecting about Christopher’s skateboarding incident and then he asked him if he had ever heard of Jim Abbott, the baseball player who had one hand. He explained in great detail that Jim pitched a no hitter in the 1990s and that he excelled at pitching because of the way he practiced. Since he and Eddie built Christopher an adaptable skateboard after their conversation, it can be speculated that Buck did the research so that he and Eddie could surprise Christopher.

In 4x6 “Jinx” after the electricity pole fell on top of the ladder truck, Buck quickly pulled out his cell phone and started researching jinxes. He even texted Josh to ask him for details about one of the solutions he found.

In 5x2 “Desperate Times” Buck gave the 118 a whole breakdown about some of the serious predators at the L.A. Zoo when they were on the firetruck enroute to capture some of the animals that had escaped during the blackout. That’s when Eddie told them, “He takes Christopher there all the time, got the place memorized”.

In 5x14 “Dumb Luck” Buck admitted to Eddie that he and TayKay did some research to find the Equine Therapy place. Eddie then asked him, “What kind of research?” with his petty tone because he didn’t want Buck talking to him about her.

In 6x2 “Crash and Learn” Hen asked Buck what book he was reading and he showed her the book cover. When she read that it was an AA book, she asked him if he needed to tell them anything. He said no but that he was reading it because Bobby told him about learning how to be at ease. Reminder, all Bobby did was tell Buck about the saying he learned in AA in 6x1 “Let the Games Begin” but he didn’t tell him to read the book, Buck did that part on his own, hence RESEARCHER BUCK!

Buck is very smart and he will research a topic whenever he wants to learn more about it so that he can educate himself. Does he still make erratic, irrational and ridiculous decisions sometimes, YES! But whenever he has to make an emotional decision, sometimes he overcorrects because he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. It’s possible he’s researched topics about sperm and egg fertilization in the past and since he spent a lot of time being Buck 1.0 and he didn’t get any of those women pregnant, it can be speculated that he knows enough about conception to prevent pregnancies. If Buck did research on sperm health, then he SELF-SABOTAGED HIS SPERM by not doing the deed for 4 weeks. It’s highly unlikely that he did it intentionally so that begs the question, why did he agree to be their sperm donor? The answer is simple, he agreed because he doesn’t like to hurt people’s feelings. But Buck really DOESN’T WANT TO BE CONNOR AND KAMERON’S SPERM DONOR because he wants to have his own family someday. Let’s be clear, Buck is NOT maliciously lowering his sperm count but it’s possible that he could be doing it subconsciously like he did in 5x11 “Outside Looking In” when he asked TayKay to move in with him. He told Hen that she looked “pre-hurt” when he was preparing to tell her that he cheated, but when he finally admitted to her that he kissed someone else in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia”, she said he trapped her there with no place for her to go and then she left. When he returned home from work and she was there sitting on her couch, he said, “You think I trapped you?” and she asked him, “Am I wrong?” then Buck finally responded, “I’m not sure.” Therefore he may have agreed to be Connor and Kameron’s sperm donor just to make them happy so that they wouldn’t be “pre-hurt” either which means he would not have to turn them down. If the only reason he agreed to it was to prevent them from being hurt, then that’s the main reason why Buck shouldn’t have agreed because he’s not emotionally stable enough to make this type of decision.

Buck knows that he wants a family of his own so him subconsciously self-sabotaging his sperm is important especially since he made it a point to say it had been 4 weeks since he last did the deed. The time frame he mentioned to Hen was very specific which also alludes to the possibility that he completed the research and retained all the necessary information. Would it have been easier for him to just tell them no and that he didn’t want to be their sperm donor, YES! But Buck is a people pleaser so in his mind this was probably the best solution so that everyone could be happy, i.e., he could agree to be their donor but he also wouldn’t have to worry about having any Buck Jr.’s or Buckette’s running around in the world. This wasn’t the best solution because everyone involved could end up getting hurt; therefore he should have talked with someone else in addition to Hen about it before he agreed to do it. Also Hen probably knows that Buck doesn’t want to be their sperm donor since she was in MEDICAL SCHOOL to be a doctor and biology is one of the first subjects med students learn about during their first year. She proved that she knows all about biology during her practical exam in 6x5 “Home Invasion” but her reasoning for not telling Buck that she knew what he was doing was because she wants him to make the decision for himself without her input. A caveat to his self-sabotage could include the clinic finding something in his blood that he didn’t expect which would cause him to spiral and lead to his breakdown. The audience will have to wait and see how this all plays out in upcoming episodes.

#buddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #Anti Connor and Kameron #911 fox #911 on fox #911onfox #911 speculation #911 spoilers #911 s6 #911 meta #911 #911 season 6 #911 season 6 speculation #evan buckley character study 911 #eddie diaz character study 911 #buck's breakdown 911

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magic-number-3 · 3 years

Text

okay so i actually did watch a few episodes of 911 this week without liveblogging them but i did take notes as if i was liveblogging and then just,,, didnt lmao so in case anyone cares about my thoughts im going to share them anyway asdlfkjsdl mostly i think they’ll just be fun to look at later

2x02

CHRISTOPHER CAN BE ON SCREEN FOR 2 SECONDS AND I LITERALLY LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Eddie Diaz is soooooo fuckin dreamy i stgggggg

“I cant order you guys to go inside that building and im not gonna judge you if you decide not to” “Hen, you got a kid, so...” “Yeah. And I’d hope if someone whose job it was to save him they’d do it. No matter what.” QUEEN SHIT 😤😤😤

Marvin you on thin ice but you right; you a king

IM GOOD COACH HEART OF A CHAMPION WHY AM I CRYING

HEART OF CHAMP I AM CRYING AND THEY ALL KEEP SAYING IT BACK TO HIM IM- IM FRAGILE RN. LITERALLY WHY DID EVERYTHING ABOUT HIS ARC MAKE ME SO EMO

NOT HENRIETTA. FUCK

2x03

MADDIE I BELIEVE IN YOU YOU GOT THIS QUEEN

“They could really use a miracle today” “I might just have a few of those left. I see them.” ALSKFKGKS crying why is the dialogue so good in this show???

FUCK. RUSS ITS YOUR DAY OFF

Russ gonna die im calling it. They saved the athlete and they’ll probably save the little girl?? So hes not gonna make it. At least hen is okay

“Even i couldnt save me. You dont know me, but im good.” “Oh yeah? Well maybe im better”

FUCK. I called it but it still hurts

CLOSE CALL WITH THAT ELEVATOR OMGGG

ALL OF THAT ENDING??? WE CAN BE HEROES SLAPS AND IK WE BEEN KNEW BUT ALDJFKFKSKJ everything about the end to that episode is so 👌👌👌 i wanna cry

EDDIE RUNNING TO HIS BOYYYYYYYY IM

ATHENA AND BOBBY HELL YEAHHHHH the husband is a straight g pullin thru for him like that

2x04

OMG CHRISTOPHER AND EDDIE IM 🥺🥺🥺

Also Christopher is such. Lil cutie

THEIR LITTLE FAMILY!! THE ABUELA?

“These fire guys are totally hot” LAKJDFKAL I MEAN YOURE RIGHT

AKJDKLASDJ YOU LIVE IN YOUR INVISIBLE GIRLFRIENDS HOUSE AND YOURE TELLING ME ABOUT WEAK EXCUSES. THAT SMUG LOOK ON EDDIES FACE IM ASLKFJSAL

Oh sheet Eddies abuela 😞

Every interaction between Eddie and Christopher got me like 🥺🥺🥺

Okay how are you not supposed to ship Buddie they’re talking about being single together and then his aunt telling buck about how ‘he’s a saint’ and all that??? THATS SUCH ROMANTIC INTEREST SHIT. WHEN DO YOU HAVE A FAMILY MEMBER GUSHING TO A MAIN CHARACTER AND THAT CHARACTER ISNT THE LOVE INTEREST????

HE BROUGHT CHRISTOPHER TO WORK AWWWWW!! THEYRE GOING ON A MISSION TOGETHER

Oooh I love this song STUCK IN THE MIDDLE WITH YOU

“Now I feel kind of lame” “BECAUSE YOU ARE” LMAO HEN

Ooooh yeah why do you call him chim???

BOBBY AND CHRISTOPHER. CHIM AND CHRISTOPHER. THIS IS SO CUTE

AWE EDDIE AND CAP

BOY CRUSH ON EDDIE ADLSJFLDKS

Awe good for Maddie omg 🥺🥺🥺

CHIMNEY IS A MODERN MEDICAL MIRACLE???? I mean good for him bro figured lol but for it to be said out loud shittttttt

AKSFJALSDK TATIANA SHES FUCKING MARRIED YOURE KIDDING ME HOW QUICKLY DID YOU GET MARRIED AFTER BREAKING UP WITH CHIM

alkjsdskla im losing it over Tatiana

Awww now this is sad :( chim’s got noboddddddy

Sdkljfas Buck you have GOT to move out of Abby’s place dude

‘I had a life-altering trauma and her life got altered. All I got was the trauma.’ THATS SUCH A GOOD LINE SPEAK YOUR TRUTH CHIM

YOURE MY FRIEND SHES YOUR EX. YOU GET TO FORGIVE AND MOVE ON I GET TO HOLD A GRUDGE UNTIL THE DAY I DIE ALSKFDSDA

Chim 🥺 awe. “Wakes me up in the middle of the night”. Buddy :( CAPS GOT YA

CARLAAAAAAAAAA HELL YEA

“BESIDES THAT PERFECT BONE STRUCTURE” SDKAFSJA

like. Fuck Tatiana. But also good for her. And Chim gets to start to move on!! That was a really sweet scene

Aw Bobby gets Athena ^-^

This was such a good fucking episode yo. Like the way the idea of being stuck had to do with the 911s lives while also all of the calls they went one were being physically stuck and the way the proposal instigated Chim’s breakdown to allow him to finally move on…. just. Excellent television!!!!

So proud of Maddie!!!! So proud of everybody this episode :)

Buck yeah you gotta move out buddy

2x05

ASKFJHASJLAD this has gotta be fake im sdlfkjsaldk

LMAOOOO THIS BITCH she’s gonna end up actually getting hurt

OMFGGGGGGGG this bitch had it coming

DONT WE KNOW YOUUUUUUUUU THE PORCH PIRATE?? ASLDKJFALKSS

What is this girls fucking problem with Maddie lmaaooooooo fuck off

Awe this lady with the muffin or whatever is so sweet. This places Celine dion 😂😂😂 queen

Lmao wait why is she actually horrible 😂😭😭

BUCKETTE LMAOOOOO

Omg Maddie and Athena are so fun

THEYRE PROTESTING HOMOSEXUALITY??? WHAT THE FUCK

HES A FUCKING RACIST TOO???

I CAN HELP YOU WITH THE SWEDISH HALF BUT I DONT KNOW WHICH HALF THAT IS SLKDFJASLK EDDIE

I love Maddie and Athena so much alsdkfj

WHATS HER FACE? EVA? STRAIGHT UP BITCH JFC

Gloria im sorry but you’re getting what you deserve.

LKAJSDALKS. “People who yell and scream and cry and expect you to do something for them” GIRL YOU ARE LITERALLY A 911 RESPONDER THAT IS YOUR GOT DAMN JOB???

“Do they ever think of anything but themselves and what they need?” THEY ARE USUALLY DYING GLORIA

“SNITCHES GET STITCHES” JEEZ WOMAN

I feel so bad for Hen and Karen :( Eva can fuck off dude. Can’t they get sharing rights with the dad? I mean yeah it sucks that Eva is just doing this to fuck em over but like.. the dad still deserves to get to know his son if he wants to. Though Eva would probably try to stay with him just to turn Denny against Hen and Karen… UGHHHHHH

Lil denny :( aw Hen. I love her sm

Hen what u doing girl…. Cant it make the case more difficult if you keep interacting with Eva?

I love Karen and Hen sm 🥺

WHAT YOU DOING HEN. ARE YOU JUST GONNA LEAVE HER???

YOURE FINGERPRINTS ARE ON HER NOW DUDE. GO BACK

Ugh I hate that she lived but it was the right thing to do….

“I save awful people every day its my job” Hell yeah girl

SHES GOING BACK TO JAIL HELL YEAH

Dont love cheering for her going back tho jail can be terrible…. But at least she’ll be out of Karen and hens lives. we’re not meant to think too deeply about this is.

LOVE MADDIE AND ATHENA

GLORIA IS THE FUCKING WORST

oh…. gloria… damn.

Cant you just share custody?? :( I mean it sucks but like… just talk to him.

“Yeah people can be awful… but not everyone is awful… but you’ll never know what kind of person someone is unless you give them the chance to show you” :(

WOW THE DAD IS THE FUCKING BEST?? HELL YEAH

ATHENA AND BOOBBY ARE SO FUCKING CUTE

Wow the last shot of the episode thats like the long shot at the dinner table with the narration was real fucking good :( im emo.

2x06

ADSLFJLK;ALSD. BUCK THOUGHT SHE WAS CALLING EDDIE CUTE BUT SHE MEANT CHIMNEY

listen. I do know what happens between those two and I am very excited.

Oh no maddies so anxiousssss

Buck fangirling over this reporter lady im asldkjflksad

“But the way they cared for me, thats what kept me alive” :( Hen :(

Omg are Athenas kids like the same age as Bobbys :(

SOMEONE SENT THEM EDIBLES????? OMFGGGGGG

OH NO CHIM IS THE ONLY ONE THATS SOBER

THIS WOMAN HAS A HIGH HEEL STICKING OUT OF HER FACE EWWWW ITS SO GROSS

DID THESE BEAUTY QUEENS SHRINK OR ARE WE SUDDENLY GIANTS ALKDSJFLKAKL

TEEN TINY THE WAY HIS VOICE FUCKING CRACKED

SDKFJSKDA THEYRE ALL FUCKING HIGH IM

HIGH BOBBY IS SO FUCKIN FUNNY

Oh no eddies upsetttttt 😂

This is fucking HILARIOUS

Oh no bobbyyyyyyyy :((((((

Awe the news piece was so nice

CHIMNEY AND MADDIEEEEEEE

Oh shes got a fucking POPCORN MAKER IM SO JEALOUS

Wow Taylor was really going to use the footage :/

“Just get a room already” BUCK NOOOO DUDE

The way bobby always fist bumps Athenas son whenever they say hello/goodbye. So fun 🥺good content right there

DONT TELL ME THEYRE GONNA ASK HIM TO BE IN THE PIC????

OMGGGGG BOBBYYYYYYY IM CRYINGGGGGG

AWE AND THE FUCKING SONG; WHEN YOU LOVE SOMEONE YOU MAKE ROOM YOU PROBABLY NEVER LOVED SOMEONE LIKE I DO

#LONG POST #LONG ASS POST #lol #ellie liveblogs #911 #my posts

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fuhrmana · 4 years

Text

An Incomplete List of Fics I’m Not Writing (Pt 2/?)

I would come up with a title based on Texas and LA (Slight AU, set around the time of the Halloween episode in s3)

Probably when Captain Strand was recruiting, Buck got an offer (c’mon, you know that Owen would have a soft spot for a man fighting to not let an illness keep him from firefighting)

Buck probably turned it down initially, because he was convinced that the lawsuit was going to work, and his family would accept him back with open arms

Then Buck gets back, and it’s off. Eddie’s closed off and mean, Bobby keeps punishing him, and Hen and Chimney keep making jokes that Buck doesn’t get, and that, that’s even worse than them being mad at him. He missed so much, and he feels so left out, and it’s hard to jump in and stay positive when the two feelings he gets from work are “begrudging hostility” and “you’re third wheeling on the greatest friendship in the house”

Buck starts worrying that the lawyer was right, and maybe he should have taken the money

That’s when Buck reaches out to Captain Strand and asks if he can come and formally interview

Buck usually thinks things through, but this time he’s pretty impulsive and he requests a week off

(note, I don’t know how firefighter interviews go, but in this case he’s doing a few shifts with the team to see how they fit)

Bobby signs off on it

There would be panic from the 118 except they think he’s doing Spring Break in Texas and there is some good natured teasing going on in one of the group chats, not one Buck is a part of

(Well this got aggressively long)

Buck fits in even better than he thought he would

TK and Captain Strand’s respectful and loving Father/Son relationship is #goals af, and Buck basks in the reflected light of it

Marjan Marwani (who Buck has 10000% watched youtube videos of) is possibly the coolest firefighter Buck has ever met. They bond over videos of them doing amazing rescues, and no one at the 126 treats her like she’s an idiot for jumping into danger to save people

Meanwhile, Mateo is hanging with them, watching all of these videos, and Thriving. Buck is so happy to have someone who looks up to him? It’s what he thought he was going to get when Eddie joined as a probie

Paul looks at Buck for three minutes on the first day, and says seven insightful things about Buck

Buck frantically googles “are psychics real” on his phone

Judd doesn’t know how he feels about Buck, but hell, he’s always liked dogs, and Buttercup and Buck are pretty similar

Buck loves being liked, so he considers them fast friends by the end of the first shift

TK and Buck bond over shared hospital trauma, and TK ends up taking Buck to the gay bar with Carlos and Paul

Paul looks at Buck while they’re in the car and says “I guess I’m the token straight again”

Buck blushes but does not deny it

Buck watches TK and Carlos a lot

It makes him. Think about. Things.

There is an ambiguous scene where Buck maybe goes home with someone

Buck goes on two more shifts

There are some funny calls

Some serious calls

And one call that makes local news

And picked up by national news

Buck gets a pinged in the group chat about how funny it is that he has a lookalike in Texas

Austin Texas

Where he’s on vacation

Wait a minute that’s not a look alike

Buck why are you riding with the 126?

Buck leaves them on read

Halfway through his final trial shift, Buck is drinking a coffee out of a truly magical device, when Marjan, Mateo and Paul drag him over to some couches, and shove him up next to Buttercup

Judd spots them across the firehouse and walks in another direction

Owen and TK are at the chemo place

It’s kind of an intervention

Buck has been pretty chatty about his current team, and they’re all confused as to why he’s thinking about leaving

Marjan makes at least one joke about not wanting to share the spotlight with him

Buck tries to explain, but he’s stumbling over his words and he ends it with

“You’ve known me for five days, but you asked me to explain myself. My team’s known me for years, and they would have told me what I was thinking. I’m worried I can’t. Grow with them. And that’s why I left Pennsylvania”.

Buck looks stricken after he says this and gets up walks away

Paul sighs

“He’d be a good fit here, but I don’t think he’s going to accept the offer.

At the end of the shift, Captain Strand says “we can make it work for you to join us, but I need an answer within a week.”

Buck shakes his hand, tells Captain Strand that he’ll be letting him know as soon as he’d had a chance to talk to his family

This is mostly referring to Maddie, but...

Buck gets back to LA, and finally responds to all of the messages he’s gotten since the lookalike kerfuffle

“Haha, yeah that was me. It’s kind of a funny story, I’ll tell you all tomorrow during the shift.”

He shoots a different text off to Maddie

Hey, can I see you? Just got back from the airport

He ends up at Maddie’s place, explaining how the whole week has been, and how he doesn’t want to abandon her in LA after she moved there for him, and that he feels stupid because he sued to get his job back and now he’s thinking about leaving, and probably both of them cry

Buck probably sleeps there (for old times sake)

In the morning, before he heads off to work, she stops him and says “Don’t stay for me. But see if you want to stay for yourself”

Buck goes into the firehouse, and Bobby does the breakdown of the day, and then looks at Buck and says “we’re all waiting to hear how you ended up helping the 126 during your vacation”

And Buck laughs nervously and says “Well, so I was actually doing a trial week with them” and there is a Ruckus

Chim is upset because of Maddie, but also Buck

Eddie is furious because of Eddie reasons

Bobby had kind of assumed it had to be something like that, but it Hurts to have it confirmed

Hen looks conflicted. She’s thought about leaving this job before, but never to transfer somewhere else, and she needs a minute to think it through

Buck frowns and says “I really liked working with the 118, but they aren’t my family. I don’t want to leave another family, but I need to know that you all want me here too”

Bobby is starting to wonder if he should call out his whole team and do emergency therapy

Buck is kind of hoping the bell will go off so it can end here

The bell does not go off

Bobby starts talking, but trails off before he finishes the sentence and restarts

“Athena told me I either had to let you do the job or go somewhere where you could. Buck, I want you here, and I’m sorry I haven’t shown it. I don’t think this can be fixed overnight, so maybe we should talk about your timeline

the bell rings right after this

Bobby gets dramatic timing better than Buck does

When they get back from the call, Buck and Bobby and the spirit of every sponsor and therapist the two of them have ever had have a conversation about what Buck needs at his job

And the fact that Bobby is willing to make a few concessions and admit that he was in the wrong about a few things

Buck leaves the office to find that the rest of the team has divvied up his time to talk through why exactly he was leaving and why he shouldn’t

Chim is blunt, Hen is supportive of whatever decision Buck needs to make and Eddie glares at Buck and tells him that they’re meeting at Eddie’s house after the shift

Buck wants to see Christopher, but he’s hoping that Eddie isn’t going to use Chris as the reason that Buck should stay

Buck gets to Eddie’s house after shift, only to find out that Christopher isn’t... home that night

Buck is uneasy

Eddie sticks Buck on the couch, shoves a beer into Buck’s hand and starts pacing

Eddie and Buck both aren’t great at words

Eddie starts and stops for an eternity (three minutes)

Finally Eddie sits on the couch, takes the beer he gave Buck, takes a swig and hands it back

I have to stress, there is only one beer

Eddie got Buck one, but not himself

Eddie finally settles on a sentence

“I finally started seeing a therapist”

Buck doesn’t say anything and neither does Buck

Eddie continues

“He thinks I’m projecting. Like I’m mad at you for what I was doing, and I think he’s right.”

Buck opens his mouth, but Eddie holds his hand up.

“I want you to know that I don’t want you to leave, but I won’t be angry at you if you leave, and I’ll make sure we stay in contact.”

Eddie won’t be mad at Buck, he’ll finally get mad at the person who deserves it

(that’s himself, just fyi)

Buck very carefully takes a sip of the beer.

It doesn’t seem like Eddie has anything else to say, so Buck finally speaks

“I don’t think I’m leaving. I fought to come back to you for a reason. If we’re all ready to work towards each other, I’m not going to bail.

There’s silence for a little longer. Buck hands the beer over to Eddie and continues.

“I think it was good that I tried it though. I think I needed to see how other houses work to see what I should be asking for.”

Buck wants to talk about some of the other things he’s seen but it feels like too much

Instead they play video games

Buck calls up Captain Strand and volunteers for any temporary help they may need, but nothing permanent. Bobby and Buck continue working on their relationship. Slowly Buck becomes a part of the inside jokes of Chim and Hen again. Eddie and Buck continue to spend time together, and Buck continues talking to the 126 for a while.

This is probably where this particular story ends

#9-1-1 #fic prompt

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