#drawn in a couple hours so not as polished as some of my other stuff ;w;

[milk-and-cereal]

SF-A2 ♡

[image ID in alt]

#my art #this one’s just a doodle #drawn in a couple hours so not as polished as some of my other stuff ;w; #vocaloid #vocal synth #sf a2 miki #sfa2 miki #vocaloid fanart #animecore

[junebugwriter]

Transgender Dysphoria Blues

It was around 2005. In my dorms, I made a lot of different kinds of friends, and because it was the mid-2000s, we passed around CD's to show new music to each other. Back then, one of my friends introduced me to a band of theirs from their home state, a band called Against Me!. I said I enjoyed punk and emo stuff, and he said I'd like this band.

From the first moment, I heard the raw voice of the lead singer. This person was straining, yelling, screaming with melodic intensity and purpose, laser-focused on the rage, frustration, and despair that comes with young adulthood in the Bush era. They talked about love, and death, and how our future was sold out from under us. They sang

"Baby, I'm an anarchist and you're a spineless liberal We marched together for the eight-hour day and held hands in the streets of Seattle But when it came time to throw bricks through that Starbucks window You left me all alone, all alone..."

I was enthralled. I had never encountered anything like this music before. Well, that's not true. I'd heard punk before--older stuff, like the Clash, the Sex Pistols, the Ramones, stuff that spoke to a moment in time that seemed ancient to me but was only a couple of decades before--but not punk like this. Not punk that actually had some fucking teeth. Not punk that wasn't afraid to be proudly anarchistic, nakedly political, and darkly poetic in this way.

In 2007, I got the newer album, New Wave, and again, this was more of the stuff I loved. Sure, New Wave was a bit more polished, but it was still filled with all those rough emotions that spoke to a disaffected young "man" like me. There was something to the way the lead singer belted out those bars that really nailed something within me, something ineffable, intangible at the time. Something gestating quietly within my brain, a feeling that something wasn't quite right with me, but couldn't be named.

The final song on New Wave, "The Ocean," threw me for a loop. These lyrics... were different.

"And if I could have chosen, I would have been born a woman My mother once told me she would have named me Laura I'd grow up to be strong and beautiful like her...

There is an ocean in my soul Where the waters do not curve..."

At first, I thought this was simply poetic license, imagining a different life, imagining one in which they could be completely different, living a humble, domestic existence far from the drugs and rock and roll. One of simplicity, happiness, bliss. But... something gnawed at me. Why a woman? Why that name? Mysterious to my young brain.

I had not yet heard the word "transgender." I didn't have any context for it. But I knew the ocean in the soul, whose waters did not curve. I knew the depths that dwelled beneath. I knew that there was so much more to my being that even I couldn't quite understand.

Time passed. I graduated from undergrad, and had moved on to graduate school. In grad school, I had more education about LGBTQ+ issues, and had drawn closer to being in the "ally" camp of things, even in the Methodist church. I was drawn to the cause, yet couldn't quite understand why I identified with so many of the struggles they faced.

Near the end of it, a year before I graduated, news came out about the lead singer of Against Me!. She was transgender. Her name was Laura Jane Grace.

My mind raced. Wait, what? The singer with the raspy, raw, and to my mind, thoroughly masculine voice... was a woman now? I googled furiously. I had to learn more. I read every article about her. I drank deep of the news. I had to understand how this turn of events could be. Wait, someone can just... be a woman? And not know it? You can simply do that?

I watched some interviews with her. She seemed thoroughly natural in more feminine clothing. She smiled far more than I thought possible, knowing what she looked like before. She was... happy.

I was worried. What would happen to this band, now that their singer was different? Would her voice change? Would their songs change? I was nervous. But also... I was oddly excited. I knew what a trans person was. I knew that it was a thing you could be. But now, it suddenly became personal in a weird way. Because now I knew a trans person, if not personally, but through the art they made.

A couple years later, they came out with a new album. For whatever reason, I never took the time to listen to it. I had moved out to the country, and buying CDs was becoming passé, but I didn't know how else to buy music now, because I didn't want to bother buying songs through Apple. So... I never listened to it. Until recently.

Here's the title track of the album.

I no longer worried about the band. I knew that they were the same, just... actually wrestling with the thing that lurked within the ocean of Laura Jane Grace's soul.

With the kraken within the depths of my soul.

I was partly afraid of listening to the album. I was afraid of change. But I'm learning I'm more courageous than I thought I was. I'm learning to face the beast down in the depths, the dysphoria that stares back at me from the mirror each day. It has a name now. It has dimension, and weight, and yes, some days it is overwhelming and too much.

But I can fight it.

She wrestled with it in this album, highs and lows. Regrets, memories, eulogies for lost friends. All through the funhouse lens of gender dysphoria. And suddenly, all the rage, all the fury, came roaring back to the fore. The rage had an edge, and the edge cannot be dulled because it is an edge piercing all the way down to the spinal column. The cracks in the voice, the strain of the vocal cords, the tears and the joy and the endless, rocking waves of emotional turmoil... they can be viewed clearly now. They had a name.

It's a good album. I think every trans femme ought to listen to it, especially if you like punk. Because all the anarchist fury and anti-establishment wit is still there, just with a different set dressing, with a different lens, a different focus. If anything it's sharper. More raw. More powerful.

Happy Pride. This is the anthem of the month for me. I'm trans, and I'm going to help burn this world down build a better one in its ashes.

Thank you, Laura Jane, and Against Me!. You helped me understand the weapons in my hands better than any other band.

#transgender #lgbtq #lgbtqia+ #blog #music #punk rock #against me! #laura jane grace #transgender dysphoria #gender dysphoria #transgender dysphoria blues #Youtube #pride #trans pride #trans mtf #trans women #transfem

[spaceskam]

From A Whisper To A Scream (2/10)

warning: homophobia & kyle being a teenage dirtbag

ao3

1 |

Michael broke out the nail polish remover the next morning.

As much as he wanted to flaunt the black nail polish with pride, he wasn’t in the mood to have anyone assuming things that he wasn’t ready to share. And by anyone, he specifically means Isobel and Max. They knew Alex was his tutor and they knew he wore black nail polish, it wasn’t a stretch to figure out that he did it. And if they saw that he did that, they’d probably assume Michael let him do other things too.

Max, Isobel, and Michael had all made an agreement when they were young that they would have to settle for having each other. They wouldn’t date and they definitely wouldn’t swap bodily fluids with humans. They didn’t know what kind of damage they could do to a human and they also couldn’t risk anyone finding out what they were.

As far as he knew, Max and Isobel had kept that promise. Michael, however, had lost that battle awhile ago. He lost his virginity the same night he had his first kiss, namely because he lied to the girl that he’d already kissed someone before, and he went on such a shame spiral that even now, over a year later, he hadn’t told Isobel and Max that it was safe. He was too scared to.

He was extra cautious, obviously. He wore condoms, he pulled out, he made sure to keep bodily fluids in general to a minimum just in case. With the four people before Alex, it’d been easy. He slept with them and then he’d feel guilty and he wouldn’t talk to them again. Occasionally they’d tell other people and he would deny it and he would hate himself for it. Even now, he harbored so much guilt when it came to sex. He wasn’t sure if it was solely because of Isobel and Max or if the religious group home he stayed in for the first four years in Roswell actually instilled some of their religious shame, but it was still there.

But then there was Alex. He had no shame and no fear. Not about that kind of stuff, anyway. He was still cautious, but there was something about Alex that made him relax enough to fully enjoy himself. It’d been only about a month of it and he still regularly made sure it wasn’t fucking Alex up, but it felt safe. It was nice to let go for once.

What wasn’t as nice was the fact that he could tell shit was changing. Alex was the only person he’d hooked up with more than once and it was very obviously taking a toll on him. He wanted to see him more, wanted to touch him in ways that weren’t just to hook up. And then last night seemed different and it locked in all those fuzzy feelings for good. Hell, he was pissed that Alex couldn’t stay the night. He wanted to just lay with him for hours. Which was something he couldn’t do. Not when Isobel and Max couldn’t know. 

He still wanted Alex. Dorky, talented, sweet Alex.

Michael pushed that thought completely out of his mind by the time he got into his truck to head to school. He had early practice to take care of which would hopefully remind him that being with Alex wasn’t an option. Even if it was fun and the nicest thing he ever got for himself.

The first half of the day went by quickly as he did his best to stop thinking about Alex. Which would’ve been significantly easier if he didn’t look completely fine while Michael was mentally planning their wedding. 

Lunch rolled around and Michael sat with Isobel and Max, mindlessly shoveling fries into his mouth as he watched Alex with the rest of the band geeks. He was laughing and joking and didn’t look at him once. It was almost annoying. Didn’t he think the night before was different too? Or did Michael see something that wasn’t actually there on Alex’s end?

“Earth to Michael?”

He looked over to see both Max and Isobel looking at him with sheer concern. Which was warranted. He was fucking up and he wasn’t even hiding it. But how could he?  No matter how much he tried to distract himself, he kept picturing Alex back in his bed and kissing him and listening to him whisper words of affirmation during sex. That was always nice.

“Who are you even looking at? Alex?” Max asked. Michael shrugged in response and they both fell quiet.

“You like him,” Isobel whispered. He didn’t respond right away and Isobel smacked his hand with her spoon.

“Hey!” he scoffed.

“You can’t like him,” she said, shaking her head, “And you know why.”

“I know, I know,” Michael sighed, slumping back in his seat, “It’s just so hard when he’s right there, you know?”

“Do you need someone to come with you during tutoring sessions?” Max asked. Michael rolled his eyes.

“I’m not a kid, I do have self-control,” Michael said and hoped that he wasn’t revealing just how little control he actually had when it came to Alex. 

“Maybe you should dial it back though? I’m sure studying with him every day isn’t helping,” Isobel suggested, “I’m just trying to help.”

Michael stared at them and questioned if it might actually be worth it to just tell them. But what if they’re angry? What if they distance themselves from him because he’s risking their safety? What if, what if, what if.

“I’m fine. Seriously. We’re just friends. I can have friends, can’t I?” Michael sighed, looking back over to Alex. He caught his eye for the first time that day and Alex just smiled before looking back to his friends. Fuck.

“Guerin!”

Michael’s eyes snapped from Alex to Kyle who was strolling up to him. He had a love/hate relationship with him that was two sided. Kyle was a good player and he was nice when he wanted to be, but he was a follower and it got annoying and Michael knew he was pissed that he made quarterback. But that wasn’t his fault. He was just better.

“Yeah?" Michael said.

"Afterparty, my house," Kyle said. Michael had made a habit of stealing a couple hours with Alex after his games and his eyes instinctually went towards Alex. He could say no, but then they'd ask questions. And saying no to Alex wasn't an option.

"Can I bring someone?" Michael asked. Kyle raised an eyebrow and looked at Max and Isobel. "Not them."

"Who?"

"Don't worry about it."

"Whatever, man, just no one who's gonna trash the place," Kyle said, walking away. Michael rolled his eyes. As if the team wasn't going to destroy it enough. 

When he looked back to Isobel and Max, they were looking at him with wary eyes. He shrugged.

"I'm allowed to have friends other than you guys."

"Yeah, but…" 

"I promise I'm not going to do something stupid."

They didn't say anything, but they both seemed to think he absolutely was.

-

"Motherfucker." 

"Sorry, sorry," Michael said, trying to hold back his giggles as he put his hand beneath Alex's head even though he'd already hit it on the side mirror of the truck. "You okay?'

"Stop laughing, you asshole," Alex spat, glaring at him. He pushed Michael away and felt the back of his head, checking to see that there wasn't any blood. There wasn't. 

"I'm not laughing," Michael said even though he was a little bit. Not because he hit his head, but because he was feeling more than a little giddy. Alex had come over without Michael having to ask him to under the guise of doing homework and had all but pulled Michael out of his truck the moment they got to his trailer. He’d pressed Michael into the side of his truck to kiss him which was all fun and games until he tried to flip them and forgot how close they were to the mirror. “For real, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, no thanks to you,” Alex said, still glaring.

“You want me to kiss it better?” Michael offered. Alex rolled his eyes and shoved his shoulder. Instead of pushing him entirely though, he used the movement to grab a fistful of his letterman and pull him in. Michael smiled and leaned in closer, pressing a kiss to his cheek. He could feel Alex relax in response. “Let’s go inside.”

Michael unlocked the trailer door and Alex followed. They pet Dog on the way to his room, but closed the door to it before he could follow. There was whining for a couple seconds before he quickly got bored of it and went back into the living room.

“So,” Alex said, looking at with eyes that could destroy Michael if he wanted to, “What happened to fuck ‘em?” 

Michael smiled and slowly walked closer, holding his hands up in surrender and telekinetically locked the door while Alex was distracted. Alex's eyes immediately were drawn to his clean nails again before looking back to his eyes. He was so calm. It really did seem like the night before wasn't all that different to him at all.

"I can explain that," Michael said, "My friends would've put it together and I was protecting your modesty."

Alex rolled his eyes, but he wasn't smiling. Not even kind of. Michael watched him cautiously as Alex crossed his arms over his chest.

"You're really that scared of people knowing you're bi?" Alex asked. Michael blinked once, twice, three times as he processed the question. He shrugged.

"No, it's not that. Isobel and Max already know," he said. And they did know. Even if they only found out this morning from him staring too much. Alex furrowed his eyebrows.

"So it's me?" 

Michael's eyes widened and he shook his head.

"No," he said, stepping closer, "Why? Do you… Do you want people to know?"

"No," Alex answered easily and Michael wasn't sure if he should be offended or not, "But I also don't wanna sleep with someone who thinks I'm an embarrassment."

"Definitely not," Michael insisted. He stood close, waiting for the green light he needed. Alex didn't exactly give him one. "Are you mad at me for taking it off?" 

"No," Alex scoffed, "I am mad at you for making me hit my head."

"I'm sorry," Michael laughed, "Seriously. How can I make it up to you?"

Alex pursed his lips and pretended to think about it. Michael bit the inside of his cheek, shaking his head. He stepped out of shoes, kicking them out of the way before dropping his letterman on the floor. Alex's faux-thinking face had been replaced with a wild little smile.

"Blowjob, your highness?" Michael asked. Alex laughed that sweet laugh of his and pushed Michael's shoulder, but he retaliated by basically tackling him to the bed. Alex laughed louder as Michael tickles his sides, loud enough to make Dog bark from the other room and loud enough to make Michael's heart grow tenfold like he was the fucking Grinch.

"Stop!” Alex laughed and Michael reluctantly did, still smiling as he rested his weight on top of Alex who draped his arms around his neck, “I'm judging you so hard right now.”

"Judge yourself, you're the one in my bed."

"It's a pretty nice place to be," Alex said and it was enough to shut him up. He stared at him for a second and realized he was a goner. No going back. And that was okay. He'd handle the consequences later. 

"Do you wanna come to a party Friday night after the game?" Michael asked. Alex's smile faltered and he furrowed his eyebrows.

"A party?" he repeated, skepticism in his tone. Michael kept it casual and shrugged.

"Yeah, Valenti's throwing it, but it could still be fun."

"Pass," Alex decided. 

"I have to go though and we usually hook up on Fridays."

"I mean, just for the last couple weeks, I wouldn't say usually," Alex said. Michael's stomach dropped, but he wasn't ready to back out yet. "We can skip this week."

"I don't want to," Michael said, "Come. It'll be fun and you can stay the night after and I'll do whatever you want." 

"Whatever I want?" Alex asked, raising an eyebrow. A thought crossed his mind that he might regret it, but he figured there was nothing Alex could do to make him regret anything. "Why the hell do you want me to go anyway?"

"Look," Michael said, swallowing his pride, "I… I felt like last night was different, didn't you?" Alex visibly held his breath and Michael quickly covered his tracks. "I was thinking we could chill as, like, friends? Or something. We can be friends, right?" 

"And you wanna start that at Kyle Valenti's party? Do you know how horrible that sounds?"

"Stay close to me and no one will say shit to you, I promise," Michael said, "I just wanna hang out with you."

"Can't we do that not at Kyle Valenti's party? I really don’t want to go to his house," Alex grumbled. Michael stared at him. He didn't have a good reason why he wanted so badly for it to be at Kyle Valenti's party. Maybe because it means integrating Alex into that part of him, maybe because it was public enough for him to keep his composure, or maybe it was because he didn't want to explain why he ditched an after-party to smother himself in Alex Manes. 

"I said I'd do anything." 

"Too vague, gotta offer something specific."

"Okay, you're being diffi–"

"And nothing sexual, 'cause you do those with or without the party."

"Oh, come on!"

Alex smiled slightly, combing his fingers through Michael’s curls. Michael gravitated lower and kissed him slow. He hummed against his lips, ending the kiss and giving him a few pecks over and over before looking at him expectantly. Michael dragged his finger across his neck and plucked the collar of his shirt.

“Oh, you know what, your birthday’s coming up, isn’t it? I’ll have your payment then,” Michael said. 

“Tell me.”

“I gotta think of something and I’m also not about to spoil your present,” he argued. Alex rolled his eyes which was juxtaposed to the fact his socked foot was slowly gliding up Michael’s leg. 

“What happens if it isn’t good enough?”

“Then I’ll spend the rest of my life doing whatever you want, I guess,” Michael decided. Alex eyed him like he was deciding something important, his thumb reaching out and slowly tracing over his bottom lip. And Michael waited patiently.

“You really want me to go to this party, don’t you?” Alex asked. Michael nodded.

"No one's gonna fuck with you, I'm gonna make sure of it," he promised. Alex took a deep breath and nodded.

"Fine, okay," he agreed. Michael smiled so wide that his cheeks hurt and Alex rolled his eyes. 

Alex pulled him into another kiss and Michael decided he'd be okay if he never stopped.

-

Michael waited down the block from Alex's house, using his telekinesis to make the necklace hanging from his rearview mirror swing.

It was on the way from the school to Kyle Valenti's house, so it all worked out. He was a little nervous for the party, but he just needed to show his face for a little while and get out as soon as possible so he could spend the night taking Alex apart. Sex with Alex had always been good, but, ever since Tuesday night, it'd been fucking phenomenal. He wasn't sure what had actually changed, maybe just the fact that he didn't feel the need to come up with an excuse. 

The truck door opened and Michael just let the necklace keep swinging as he looked over to Alex. His eyes immediately widened. Instead of Alex's typical all black clothing, he had light wash jeans, a slightly worn red polo that looked like he might've stolen it from Kyle's closet, and normal sneakers in lieu of his combat boots. He still had makeup on, but it was very light in an uncharacteristic way and his hair was all combed.

"What are you wearing?" Michael scoffed. He still looked good, but it was not like himself. Alex looked at him like this was torture. And maybe it was. But he was going to make up for it.

"If anyone perceives me, I will scream," Alex said. Michael huffed a laugh.

“Don’t you think people will notice you even more if you show up looking so different?” he asked. Alex stared at him for a moment and took a few deep breaths before he sighed and grabbed the collar of his shirt. 

Michael laughed as he traded the Valenti-inspired shirt for a black long sleeved Blondie shirt with handmade, purposeful rips and holes. He ran his hands through his hair a few times to mess it up. He even pulled out a small eyeshadow palette and rubbed his index finger in the black, mindlessly putting it on his eyelids without a mirror. Then he put his ring finger in the red and put that beneath his eyes which kind of looked like he had two black eyes, but it felt purposeful and antagonistic which made it work.

"Better?" Alex asked. Michael was smiling at him a little helplessly. He was unfairly hot.

"You wanna go back and get your boots?"

"If I get out of this truck, I can't promise I'll come back knowing I'm being taken to Kyle Valenti's house," Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes at the exaggeration and rolled his eyes, putting his truck in first gear.

"Can I have a kiss then?" he asked. Alex looked at him like he was testing his patience, so Michael just flashed a smile and batted his eyelashes. A hand was placed on his cheek, though, and he could feel the cool metal of his rings as he was pulled in for a lazy kiss.

But then it ended sooner than he wanted.

"Thirty minutes and then we leave," Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes.

"I have to stay for at least an hour."

"Forty five minutes."

"Alex–"

"Forty five minutes, I sit in the car for the last fifteen, you buy me dinner, and I sleep on the edge of the bed, not by the wall."

"Sold," Michael agreed, laughing slightly and he stole another kiss and then focused on actually driving.

Alex had only actually been in his truck once before and it’d been to hook up while it was raining and he couldn’t come over. Now, though, he fiddled with the radio like he owned the place. Michael personally felt like he was sitting too far away. They were friends, right? He could sit close if he wanted to. But, clearly, he didn’t want to, so Michael didn’t push.

Kyle Valenti lived in a relatively secluded house in the desert which made it a nice spot to throw a rager while his parents were having a nice weekend away. When they pulled up, there were already trucks and cars lining the driveway. Michael parked and looked over to Alex. He was staring straight ahead and breathing methodically.

“Forty five minutes,” Alex said.

“Forty five minutes,” Michael promised.

They were able to file into the party without much attention being drawn to them. A couple people looked at Alex sideways or congratulated Michael on a good game, but for the most part they were far too entranced in their own bullshit.

“See? No one cares,” Michael said as they found the kitchen. Alex didn’t really react, his hands stuffed in his pockets and his eyes more on the floor than other people. Michael put his hand on his back and leaned closer to be heard over the music that was shaking the walls. “You good?”

“I didn’t say I would act like I want to be here,” Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes.

“Try to have fun, will you?” he asked. Michael liked partying and he liked the idea of Alex being with him when he did. He didn’t like that Alex was dead set on being miserable. Alex looked at him.

“No.”

“Fine,” Michael said, “Do you mind if I drink?”

“Do you mind if I drive your truck home?”

“Right, got it, water,” Michael agreed. He gave Alex a smile in a probably failed attempt to cheer him up. He was doing his best not to be frustrated with him for being such a downer. He was here like Michael asked and that definitely mattered.

“Alex!”

They both looked over to see Liz by the fridge, holding her cup with her hand over it. She looked confused despite her smile and she held her free hand out towards him. Alex stayed put as she moved towards him, giving him a hug. He visibly lightened up in her grasp and Michael stupidly felt a little jealous that he wasn’t able to provide that same effect.

“What are you doing here? You hate parties!” Liz said. Alex shrugged a shoulder and nodded in Michael’s direction.

“Bribery from my student,” Alex said. Michael rolled his eyes.

“Not your student,” he said.

“Mhm, sure,” Alex said, though a smile played on his lips. Michael wasn’t stupid enough to think it had nothing to do with Liz’s hand on his side. She stayed physically close to him like she didn’t even need to be told or sober to be an anchor. Michael understood that.

“Wow, I didn’t know you guys hung out outside of studying,” Liz said, looking between them. They both shrugged it off, but she had a curious look in her eye. Michael assumed she’d know what was going on by the end of the night. “That’s fun.”

“Yeah, I think so too,” Michael agreed. 

“Oh!” Liz said, nearly choking on her drink as she thought of something mid-sip, “Perfect time to tell you about that guy Rosa went on a date with!”

“The one with the motorcycle?”

“Yes! Alex, his name is Scar.”

Michael sat there in the kitchen for a solid thirty minutes with Liz and Alex, laughing along to their stories. Alex was lighter when he was with her and he made jokes. They let him join the conversation with ease and he didn’t feel like he had to pick and choose. It had him wondering if maybe he’d miscalculated. He thought of the conforming thing he and Alex had talked about and considered that bringing him here around people neither of them liked wasn’t the right way to see how he fit. Maybe he should bring him around Isobel and Max…

Suddenly, a sharp pain hit Michael's brain and he could feel Isobel calling to him. It had him doubling over a bit and he pressed his hand to his forehead. Alex instantly put his hand on his back like Michael had done to him when they walked inside. 

“Hey, you okay?” Alex asked. Michael couldn’t even answer as he pulled out his phone. He had five missed calls. Fuck.

"Yeah, I'll be right back," Michael said. Alex furrowed his eyebrows. "Isobel keeps calling, I need to make sure she's cool and it's too loud. You gonna be okay?"

"Yeah," Alex said slowly like he was even more lost.

"Just stay by Liz," Michael said, giving his arm a gentle squeeze before quickly leaving him even though he really didn’t want to.

He weaved his way through the crowd until he found the bathroom and he closed the door, immediately calling Isobel back. She answered on the first ring.

"Where are you?"

"At Kyle Valenti's party, where are you? Are you okay? What's wrong?"

"I'm waiting for Max to come pick me up from the library, but his phone died so I called you," Isobel whispered. He plugged the other ear to hear her better.

"Okay, what's wrong?"

"I..." she breathed and when she spoke again, her voice was even quieter, "I think I'm being watched."

"Watched?" Michael repeated, "By who? Why would someone be watching you?"

"I don't know," Isobel said, her voice cracking, "But I'm scared."

"Okay, okay, I... I can't really come get you, I’m, like, a twenty-five minute drive away. How far away is Max you think?"

"Um," she breathed, "I-I don't know? A few minutes, I think. Just stay on the phone with me, please?"

"Yeah, yeah, of course," he said. And he did.

They sat on the phone for about six minutes, making small talk about anything and everything to keep her mind off of being scared. He didn't like the idea that she felt like someone was watching her, but he hoped it was just her being paranoid. It was easy to be paranoid when there was an actual thing to fear.

Eventually, though, Max showed up.

"Text me when y’all get home, okay?" Michael said.

"Okay, I will, love you."

"Love you too."

Michael hung up the phone, tried to shake away his worry, and quickly left the bathroom to go find Alex. He went to the kitchen where he'd left them, but he didn't see him anywhere. He furrowed his eyebrows and went into the living room, standing on his toes to see either Liz or Alex in the crowd. There was no sign of them, but he did see a group of guys on his team laughing and mocking body language they decided was gay enough to make fun of. Michael got a bad feeling in his stomach.

"Have any of you seen Liz?" he asked. Where Liz was, Alex was bound to be. Hopefully.

"She left," Johnson said, dramatically rolling his eyes, "Bitch can't even take a joke."

"What joke?" Michael asked, eyeing them, "I wanna laugh."

"She brought the gay kid," Long laughed, "Didn't even ask. Jokes had to be made, she should’ve known that.”

"Oh, she brought him here?" Michael said, playing dumb for the sake of his own composure, "What was the joke?"

"It wasn't even that bad, I don’t know why she freaked out like that," Valenti said, "I just said, you know, he must really like hotdogs."

"Gave him one too!" Johnson laughed, gesturing to the ground. Michael swallowed as he spotted the smashed up hotdog on the floor. He huffed a laugh and hoped that Alex was the one to smash it.

"You wanna know the funniest part about it?" Michael asked.

"What?" Valenti asked. Michael took a heavy breath and looked him in the eye.

"I brought him. Not Liz. He was my plus one."

The three of them stopped laughing and the people around them started to listen in. Michael kept his eyes locked on Kyle. He knew he was bringing someone. He should've figured that out.

"For real? You brought him to my house?" Valenti asked, scoffing as if Michael was the one in the wrong. And maybe he was, just definitely not for the reasons Kyle was blaming him for.

“Yeah, I did,” Michael scoffed, “Why do you have to act like such a dick?”

“Why do you have to act like you wanna take one?”

“And what if I do?” Michael asked, throwing his arms out. That quickly made it go incredibly silent. It was stupid of Michael to say, but he was angry and he was still buzzing with anxious energy from Isobel’s call. So he said it anyway. “What are you gonna do? Fuck with me now?”

“You’re…” Long fumbled, eyes wide like he wasn’t quite able to piece it together, “You’re a…”

“Yeah,” Michael said boldly, his eyes still on Kyle. His face was borderline unreadable as he stared at him. It was like he was trying to piece together everything he knew about masculinity and being queer and trying to figure out how Michael could be both. It would’ve been funny if it wasn’t so fucking sad. “And I dare you to say shit. Alex might be too ballsy to tell someone, but I will go to Coach and you know what side he’ll take.”

Coach was notoriously intolerant towards the intolerant when it came to his team. They all knew the consequences, namely from when Coleman got thrown off the team for mocking Vasquez’s accent two years back. He didn’t play games and they all knew if Michael told, Kyle would be off the team in seconds.

“So you’ll stop being such a piece of shit to Alex, won’t you?” Michael said. Kyle’s jaw clenched even tighter. “Good luck getting Liz after this.”

Michael didn’t bother saying goodbye or gauging anyone’s reactions as he quickly started to head out of the door. He jogged all the way to his truck in hopes that Alex would be there like they agreed upon, but he wasn’t. Michael’s stomach dropped. This was just too much all at once.

Instead of getting in his truck and driving to find him, Michael just kept jogging down the dark driveway and then down the dark road that led towards town. It took a few minutes before he heard another pair of crunching footsteps and saw a shadow ahead of him.

“Alex!” 

Alex slowed a little, but he didn’t stop walking. Michael caught up fast, though, and grabbed his arm. Alex whipped around and glared at him, his makeup smudged. It was dark, but Michael could tell that he had mustard stains on his shirt.

“I’m so sorry, I swear, I thought they’d leave you alone,” Michael insisted. Alex laughed dryly and tried to smile a little cynically, but it was more than clear that he was about to cry. “Alex, c’mon, let’s just go back to the truck and go to my house.”

“No, you know what, I’m not doing this with you,” Alex said, taking a step back, “Hooking up with you while knowing you’re in the closet is one thing, but being your friend while knowing you hang out with homophobes? Yeah, no, not doing that, I already have enough of those people in my life. I’m not doing this. I’ll be your tutor, but that’s it.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Alex, seriously? I know that wasn’t great, but‒”

“That’s not the point!” Alex snapped, a couple tears rolling down his cheeks and breaking Michael’s heart in the process, “I didn’t want to come here! I knew that shit was going to happen and I did it because you wanted me to! You wanted me to go into a place where you knew people there were going to attack me! And I let you! That’s not fair!”

“I know!” Michael said, torn between wanting to move closer and knowing that was a bad idea, “I’m sorry! It was stupid and I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again. Hell, I just came out to them, so I’m probably not gonna be invited to anymore parties with them.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Alex asked, shaking his head, “I didn’t ask you to do that.”

“I know you didn’t,” Michael said, “But you’re right. I need to stop listening to their bullshit and pretending it doesn’t affect me. I’m trying, okay? And I’m so, so sorry. I thought I could keep you safe, but, you’re right, I shouldn’t have put you in that position in the first place. Please, please, please don’t stop being my friend. I’ll do better. I swear, I’ll do better.”

Alex scoffed, “Friend.”

“What?”

“If this is how you treat your friends, you’re a shitty friend,” Alex said. Michael licked his lips. He didn’t really know how to say he never really had a friend before to use as a good reference, so he didn’t.

“Well, good thing I don’t wanna be just friends with you.”

Alex stared at him for a moment, so still that the moonlight was able to catch him in just the right way to make him glow. He was stunning even with the makeup running down his face and his stained shirt.

“You have absolute garbage timing,” Alex said, voice a little rough. Michael laughed softly, taking a slow step forward.

“Yeah, probably. But I still mean it,” Michael said honestly, “Please just come back to the truck and we’ll talk. I fucked up, okay? I’ll do better. I’m learning. But I’m out to them, so I have no excuse anymore for being stupid. I’m calling them out from now on, I promise you. I’ll prove it to you if you’ll let me. But I don’t want you walking home in the dark like this, but if you want me to take you home, I will.”

Alex licked his lips and took a few deep breaths, clearly making him wait for it. 

“Can I have your soft pillow when we get to your house?” 

Michael made a sound that was a cross between a laugh and a sigh of relief. “Alex, I will literally give you whatever you want.”

That seemed to be the right answer when Alex moved forward and wrapped his arms around his waist for a hug. Michael wrapped him up right back and breathed him in, not even caring that he was probably ruining both of their shirts. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest after the hectic last thirty minutes, he needed it.

“What did Isobel want?” Alex mumbled against his shoulder.

“She got scared and needed me on the phone until Max got there.”

“Oh,” Alex breathed, “Okay.”

“Where did Liz go?”

“Drove off, I guess. I think she was more upset that Kyle was being annoying more than she was actually upset with what he did,” Alex whispered, “I love her, but she’s dumb about boys.”

“It happens to the best of us.”

Alex sniffled and squeezed him before letting go. 

“Can you go get the truck and just come get me? I don’t want to go closer to the house,” Alex said. Michael nodded without hesitation.

“Don’t move,” he said. Alex gave a thumbs up.

 Alex spent the night cuddling Dog and Michael decided he was the luckiest son of a bitch in the world.

#Malex #malex fic #michael guerin #alex manes #rnm fic #my fic #verse: from a whisper to a scream #next chapter is where shit starts to hit the metaphorical fan

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Space Orcs, “Undercover.”

Wrote something for you all this morning. It’s a little more fun and fluffy than anything else, but it also forward the arc, so I hope you like it. Have a great day everyone 

Also we have a discord server now, and he link below should be permanent. Hope to see you there :)

https://discord.gg/cTY5SHx

“So you two are planning to…. What exactly? Pose as one of us to get information from these people.”

“That is kind of the general idea I guess.”

Sitting at the bar surrounded by  all the noise and lights their conversation went unheard the rest of the bar goers around them. 

The bartender and his small Finnari companion wandered off at intermittent times to serve drinks to other customers before wandering back.

The human leaned against the bar, “Look, if that is your plan, then you are going to need some help blending in.”

The commander raised an eyebrow, “Blending in, how so. She's a Drev I’m a human slap on some makeup and a little hair dye and no one will be the wiser.” 

The bartender just smiled and shook his head as if amused at the Commander’s ignorance, “no no no, that’s not how it works. You see there is an entire culture behind extrials, a lot of stuff we had to do before it became legal and a lot of stuff we still do now as a sort of memento of the hard times.”

The commander blinked, “Oh, really. I had no idea.”

“That’s alright. It’s not like we advertise it out to everyone, that’s the whole point of it being a secret. Look me and Vin’an get off in like fifteen minutes, and we can help you two out. Besides, the people who have been approaching everyone would never consider doing it here anyway. Most of these people aren’t rich enough, and the establishment is actually a legal one which means it is prone to inspections.” 

“Right, sounds fun.”

The commander turned in his seat and leaned back resting his elbows up on the bar. Sunny watched him from where she sat a seat over still nursing her drink, “You seem relaxed for someone who is preparing to spend the next couple of days in espionage.”

He grinned, “Ah but it is also the kind of espionage where I can go partying with my best friend, so I would consider it a little less working and a little more paid vacation.”

She rolled her eyes, “You’re an idiot, you know that.”

“You love it.”

“Mmmmhmmm sure.”

Sunny finished her Drink and the commander closed his eyes seeming to soak up the atmosphere like some sort of strange sponge. Sunny would never understand that about him, of course she liked going out and doing things, but she couldn’t imagine being able to recharge around people. After a while she needed a break, but it looked like he was getting ready to fall contentedly asleep.

A knock on the bar behind them, and she turned to see the bar tender had been replaced by a different couple/

“You two ready to go.”

“Sure thing boss.” the commander turned to sunny, “Come on lets go be cultured and things.”

She just shook her head again but followed along with the group of them as they were motioned through the backdoor behind the bar and up a flight of stairs.

“You guys live here?” The commander wondered.

“A lot of us live in the same building. It makes it easier on all of us. less questions asked and a lot safer, we can pool our money for security equipment and what not. Strength in numbers as it were.”

“Right, makes sense.”

He shouldered open a door to the next apartment stepping into a room lined in UV lights over large potted plants. Everything else had a very modern futuristic looks with neon floor lights and minimalistic furniture, “Damn, bartending pays well.” The commander muttered under his breath, “And I’m still sleeping in a twin.”

“Make yourselves comfortable, go ahead and sit anywhere.”

Before Sunny would do anything the Commander had claimed a strange circular shaped chair that was hanging from the ceiling. It rocked back and forth, and he seemed to be enjoying himself, which was rather amusing to her. It was like trying to wrangle a puppy..

A moment later the bartender came to sit down with them, and the Commander was polite enough to stop his playing around and pay attention, which was a feat all in itself.

“Alright, so a little background for you guys, just general information that anyone in the community would know.” He cracked his knuckles, “The LFIL began as a result of one of the oxyclinics.”

“Oh hey! I worked at one of those after the war for a short time,”

The punk nodded, “Than you know, in those places you tend to get kind of intimate and close up with other aliens. Generally it was very rare and the humans kept everything professional. Generally it started with them having feelings for some people they met but never saying anything or mentioning it because at the time they thought it was wrong. Plus also it was seriously and very professionally wrong to go and do anything about it. However, there was one couple, a Drev and a human who became really good friends during the course of the treatment, and eventually wen the Drev left they kept in contact. Turns out that the human’s second job was as a cage fighter down on one of the local stations for money. They ended up running into each other there where the Drev saw them fight. That led to more time spent hanging out and you get the gist. Independently stories like that were happening all over. Finnari worked well with humans who wanted someone to protect, drev like fighters, and Tesraki were drawn by people’s good business sense and stayed for how loyal humans are. Eventually it spread from the oxy clinics.”

“Wow, I had no idea it began that way, though I guess it makes sense.”

The bartender smiled, “Yeah. I met Vin’an when looking for a place to stay. I had just moved here, and she was looking to hire a human to keep her safe in the big cit. Things progressed from there, so my story is a little less complicated than most, but I guess the one thing you need to know that relates to all extrials is that we are all, in some way very, very eccentric. If you are going to date an alien tan odds are you are going to stand out in other ways as well. At first, it was sort of just a coincidence of personality, but when we started to learn that there were others like us, we started doing it on purpose to let people subtly know who and what we were.”

“But plenty of humans are eccentric.” Sunny pointed out 

He turned to look at her, “Not so much off earth. They tend to be military or business types, so not a lot of eccentricities going on. Plus, for a while, we used tattoos to signal what we were, generally we would get the image of the alien that we were attracted to on the arm or other part of the body.  It was all in an effort to let each other know what we were and what we were willing to do.”

“And how did aliens react to that?”

“You know, I think there is this misconception that aliens are less prone to odd behaviors than humans and that it is humans that always initiate, but that isn’t true. I know plenty of couples where the non-human was the first one to approach. Of course, it is definitely more of a personality  based thing than any other type of relationship. You will find that there are very few extrials who are attracted to aliens outright in the way that normal people are. I mean yeah there are a few, obviously, but most of us had no idea until we met the perfect person. In fact, I've dated plenty of humans in my time, and it didn’t bother me. But that is how a lot of the progressions go, you start out as really good friends, and then it goes from there as you get to know each other.” he clapped his hands, “Anyway, first thing is first, we need to make you look like one of us, that means eccentric.”

From where she was sitting cross-legged on the floor, sunny looked up, “He wears an eyepatch and a military grade cybernetic leg. I think he’s already eccentric enough to fit in.”

The other human laughed while the commander flipped her the bird.

“I mean that is kind of true, but we want you eccentric in a way where no one is going to recognize you. Sunny, I am going to have you go out with Vin’an and pick out some nail polish for your new color. She can help you get ready.”

***

Something the commander and Sunny thought was going to take an hour or two turned into an entire day. Sunny ended up stuck sitting on the roof with the little Finnari being painted a nailpolish color that was called ‘opal unicorn’ which was sort of silver white with sparkles in it. It was a very pretty color, kind of reminding her of her brother’s late partner, but that didn’t mean she enjoyed all the work it took to put the stuff on. It took almost three applications over her full body and A UV light source to harden the stuff.

Still though, she assumed it was much more intense than Adam, and when they returned to the apartment she was surprised to find that he wasn’t there. The two of them sat around for a while playing games and talking about random things until the door clicked open and two humans walked in.

At first Sunny thought The bartender had brought home another one of his other friends before her eyes zeroed in on the human’s face. The eye color was different now a bright blue, but she would know that sheepish expression anywhere.

“Ho-ly shit.” She said looking him up and down, “IS that really you in there.”

He flipped her the bird, “yeah, it’s me.”

The bartender was grinning from one side of his face to the other.

“You know I am pretty sure he went out and did this just to amuse himself.”

“I mean you do look pretty funny.”

“I am very much not a fan of getting a nailgun through my soft cartilage, lets get that straight.”

Sunny tilted her head “Oh so those aren’t clip ons.”

“No, no they are not clip ons.”

“Huh.”

“Told you, no one will recognize you.” The bartender said, grinning 

“Yeah no one will recognize me, I don’t even recognize myself. It seems to e a trend in my life lately, dying and cutting my hair.”

Sunny tilted her head the other way. His new look was primarily characterized by lightning blue hair shaved almost to the scalp on the sides and long on the top with some sort of magic holding it straight up in the air. Both of his ears were pierced including one that had piercings along both the top and bottom of the ear with a chain connecting the two.

The more she looked the more she wanted to laugh.

Somehow, he even had a stud in his upper chest around the base of the throat near the collarbones

“You laugh, I Kill You.”

“Don’t worry, I'll just incapacitate you with a large magnet.”

“Mother fucker.” 

She danced away laughing as he charged at her skipping out of the way as his heavy boots thudded over the ground.

“Hey, quiet down you’ll wake up my neighbors.” The man hissed as the two of them skidded to a stop.

“You look like a baby punk walked into a staple factory.” Sunny mocked 

“And you look like unicorn ji-”

“Keep it civil.”

He shut his mouth tight, “Alright, are we ready, finally?”

“Well, not exactly.”

He crossed his arms, “What do you mean not exactly.”

He smiled “well you aren’t going to convince anyone… unless.”

“Unless what?”

“Unless you actually look like a couple 

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh, now go on hold her hand. She’s got enough of them to spare.”

Sunny looked at Adam, Adam looked at Sunny.

“Well go on its not like you’re suddenly going to become extrial if you hold hands.”

“That's not the-” Adam began

“Less talking more hand holding.”

Sunny shrugged and held out her upper left hand. Adam stared at it cleared his throat, reached out and paused.

“Come on, we haven’t got all night. Promise you aren’t suddenly going to be attracted to aliens.”

“I never said-”

“Go on.” 

He looked over at sunny again. She tilted her head at him, “Wow, making me feel really great here Adam, promise I don’t have germs.”

He ignored them, reached out and took her hand.

He was…. Very awkward. The palm of his hand was very sweaty, and he didn’ts seem to understand that the point of hand holding was to make contact with the person and not avoid touching them as much as possible.

The punk sighed and walked over, “have you ever held hands with anyone…. Ever?”

“No.”

“Oh hmm.”

He walked over grabbed them and readjusted, “Hold down here, and now get a bit closer, closer. Seriously dude what is your issue. You sort of just interlace the fingers like that.” He practically had to bodily move Adam right up next to sunny.

He was stiff as a board.”

“You aren’t very good at this.”

Adam had his mouth clamped shut.

“Honestly you can actually look like you like her. I know you guys are friends and friends hold hands all the time.”

Adam tugged at the collar of his jacket, “Is it hot in here?”

“Stop trying to change the subject.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just really really bad with anything in this related field.”

“You’ve never had a girlfriend?’

“No.”

“Boyfriend.”

“No/ “One night stand.”

“No.”

His eyes were wide, “Wow, so you’re still.”

“Can we change the subject please.”

Off to his side he could feel sunny shaking. He looked over at her only to find that she was laughing silently behind his back.

“What’s so funny.”

“You, you’re funny. I have never met someone so adorably inept at interpersonal relationships.”

“This is a fake interpersonal relationship.”

“Just imagine how you would manage the real thing.” She continued to laugh and he frowned at her.

“Alright now why don’t we go out, get used to this outside head around and get to know the places. It’ll be a fun night.”

She pulled Adam closer, “Oh yes it will.”

He groaned.

***

The guy hadn’t been wrong. They went all over the city catching looks everywhere they went through their presence was greeted with great enthusiasm in almost every location. The commander kept his eye out for any suspicious activity though he didn't expect it to happen right away if at all. Him and sunny wouldn’t be likely to be approached seeing as they weren’t an established member of the community, but perhaps they could integrate well enough that they would notice when someone was approached.

Halfway through the n night the commander walked off to get drinks. 

Sunny sat looking around the room and occasionally talking with some of the other patrons. Adam returned a moment later sitting next to her and handing her a drink before sliding his hand back into place in hers.

She could see him from the corner of her eyes as he discreetly checked out the room.

The aperture of his fake eye was adjusting opening and closing as he used it to catalog and track every person within radius.

HE craned his head to the side leaning against her as he tried to get a look at some people on the other side of the room.

She put an arm around him turning her head to see behind them.

Light flashed and strobed as music played in the background.

At some point they were invited to dancing and then bar hopping with another group which they took in order to properly integrate themselves inward.

The night went by and sunny lost all track of location and time.

She thought she fell asleep at some point and woke up to find Adam dozing off at her shoulder.

She remembered even later in that crashing at someone else’s apparent on the floor of the living room which was strewn with almost a dozen other people.

Adam and Sunny ended up squished against the couch pressed up against each other to make room for everyone else.

She was so tired that it didn’t matter the noise.

And then they were up again on the town and back to the bars.

Adam was only growing more comfortable while she was beginning to lag. This lifestyle was not for her. She hadn’t been alone in hours. The constant noise and people were draining her life away.

At one point in the night they were sitting back on one of the couches talking. Adam stretched and put his arm over her shoulder turning his head and leaning in close. His breath was hot against her face, “Three o clock. I think I got something.” 

She turned her head forehead brushing against his. Giving him cover, “What do you see.”

He pretended to laugh and leaned closer, “I've seen these people three times. They never touch each other barely look at each other, and the have just invited one of these couples into a back room.”

“They could just be…. Offering favors.”

Adam rested his head on her shoulder, “I don’t think so. They aren’t acting right, they don’t look right, point is there is something about them that does not belong here. You know plus they are both tesraki, which is kind of a dead give away.”

She wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer, “OK yeah that is a bit suspicious.” 

“I'm going to try and get access to the GA database, hopefully our IT guy can give us a bit of help.”

Shr an a hand through his hair, “Want me to keep an eye on them.”

“Go ahead.” 

Another couple sat down across from them nearly blocking Sunny's view.

“I just have to say.” Their new neighbors commented learning closer, ‘You two are such a cute couple.”  Sunny did her best to be polite while being forced to crane her neck past their heads.

“Why thank you. How about you two though, where did you guys meet.” That should shut them up for a while

And she was right.

Adam squeezed her hand once, and then twice. 

She knew what that meant.

The two of them stood suddenly and Adam smiled, “Sorry guys, but I just got a  call in from work.  It was nice meeting you though, take care and have a good night.”

They were waved off with a smile.

Adam gripped her hand as together they walked through the club and towards the door where the Tesraki had disappeared.

Hopefully he knew what he was doing. 

[lookbluesoup]

2020 Creator Wrap

Tagged by @boarix and I’m a little late filling it out but!! Thank you so much for the tag! :D

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

#1 - Mal & Nate

I’ve been a lot more private this year with my creations, most of my stuff was collaborative fics with @saltsealed and there’s a bunch that are finished, a couple are up on Ao3, and others just need editing before we post. It used to baffle me how people could have 998762 aus but now that Mal and Nate consume most of my waking hours I’ve discovered the truth. We now have:

Written/Drawn for:

Fallout 4 (”Synth AU” / Silver Linings)

Fallout 76

Fallout - Alberta (A group RP that started this month, but I’m including it since plotting began in 2020)

Nate is a vampire

Mal is a vampire

Nate is a vampire that can turn into a little brown bat ("Pocket AU”)

RDR

Modern (Fake Dating)

Superhero/Supervillain

Starship/Aliens

Fantasy (Elf and Half-Elf)

As Wolves

Plotted for:

Dragon Age

Subnautica

Ghost (Nate moves into the house Mal is haunting)

Roman Senator/Gladiator

Conceptualized:

Ark

Vampire Hunter/Vampire

Zombie Apocalypse

Cryptid

As Lions

We wrote at least 7 novels worth of fic for them last year (400k+ words), answered all 31 October prompts with fics, and I wake up every day excited to write more so!! It’s hard to pick favorites out of all those, but they’re definitely what I’m the most proud of. 

#2 - Kiss... In Joy (Ao3 Link)

The only kiss fic I managed to finish this year (I have so many drafted ;-; Someday I’ll finish all these prompts!) so it earned a place here! Some of Nate and Nora being soft and in love. Excerpt: 

Admittedly, winning Nate’s affections was considered among her crowning achievements. A lot of people had law degrees. She was the only person in the history of the world who had brought Nate down on one knee.

“I love you, Firefly.” Nate murmured, and her chest ached in response.

“Love you, too”

#3 - New Vegas PMV 

Was very excited to get a part in the Big Iron Anniversary MAP for New Vegas! I'd never been in a PMV before this one, so it was a treat! Also Rory’s debut as my courier. Maybe he’ll get more attention this year, too.

#4 - Mal/Nate Art (here!)

Sometimes I get REALLY invested in a piece of art and spend lots of time polishing it, this was one of those! Very proud of it!

#5 - Nate With A Gulper Art (here!)

Idk??? I’m just fond of this one. It felt good to push stylization a bit and also... I love gulpers

---

Noooot sure who hasn’t been tagged yet?? I’m so sorry if you’ve been and I”m tagging you again xD Or if you haven’t yet and wish you were, here’s your chance! Say I tagged you!

@saltsealed @thewookieruns @galadrieljones @shadow-mockingbird @sekiumiarashi

#2020 creator wrap #wyn gabs

[violetwolfraven]

belmerttons?

*panicked singing* it’s after midnight and I can’t fucking sleep so of course I’m writing!!! I have school tomorrow and I’m gonna die!!!

This is gonna be my first time writing this ship as the main focus of a fic, so we’ll see how it goes, I guess. I’m gonna need to figure out how I want to portray their dynamic.

Tw: head injury, referenced child neglect

...

“Ya can’t keep doin’ stuff like this,” Buttons mumbled, “You’re gonna get yourself killed.”

Elmer winced as the other boy tied off the bandage around his head definitely harder than necessary.

His head was already pounding, and seeing Buttons—who barely even pranked back in prank wars even when Race really deserved it—angry wasn’t helping. Especially since he wasn’t quite sure why he was so angry at him.

“We all knew what could happen with the strike.”

“That ain’t what I’m talkin’ ‘bout,” Buttons muttered as he crouched down to start checking out Elmer’s bruised knuckles, “You think I didn’t see ya jump between that thug and Smalls? He had a club, El. He coulda killed you.”

“And if I didn’t jump in, he coulda killed Smalls,” Elmer argued, “What was I supposed to do, huh? She’s a lot smaller than—ow!”

“Sorry.”

Buttons didn’t sound sorry, but he did unwrap the bandage, winding it looser the next time.

“This is what you always do,” he grumbled, “Get hurt defendin’ other people, then I gotta patch you up. What’re ya gonna do when we ain’t Newsies no more and ya can’t come to me anymore, El?”

Elmer shrugged, still annoyed, “I dunno, but what do you want me to do, Buttons? Scab like Sniper, Tommy, and Blink?”

“No.”

“Then what’s the problem? Everyone else is hurt, too! Jack gets soaked fightin’ opponent’s he can’t handle every other month and ya don’t care!”

“I never said I don’t—“

“Oh, so it’s better that the only one ya call on it is me?”

“You have a family, El!” Buttons exclaimed, standing up suddenly, “For Christ’s sake, ya act like you’s the same as everyone else here, but ya ain’t! What would your family do if you didn’t come home, huh? Who’d have to go tell ‘em?”

Elmer was stunned, “Buttons—“

“Me,” Buttons growled, “Jack’s missin’, so it’d be me. I’m the only other one who knows where your family lives.”

Elmer recovered from the shock and promptly got angry again.

“You have a family, too, and I didn’t see you bein’ careful.”

Buttons snorted, “Then you wasn’t payin’ attention.”

Elmer really wished he could say he had been.

In truth, he’d been a bit preoccupied trying to keep that thug distracted long enough for Smalls to escape, then keeping said thug from killing him. After that, everything was kind of hazy until apparently, Davey found him passed out in an alleyway.

He hadn’t been paying attention to where his friend was at all.

“El...” Buttons made a frustrated noise, “You always gotta fight for everyone—and that’s a good thing—it means ya got a big heart, but... I’m serious. Since nothin’ else has made ya listen: what would your family do if you didn’t come home?”

Elmer snorted. He was a little mixed up in the head right now, but he very clearly knew the answer to that one.

“They’s got 8 other children, don’t they?”

“El...”

“Nah,” Elmer chuckled, even though he was pretty sure this wouldn’t be funny under normal circumstances, “I’m just the youngest and smallest. It ain’t like I bring in that much income. And ‘sides, nobody pays attention to me ‘cause I’m the stupid one.”

“Elmer, you ain’t stupid.”

“My big sister spent years tryin’ to teach me to read, but I couldn’t. Polish or English. I just can’t pick it up. It takes me hours to get through a article if I feel like tryin’. Why do ya think Jack reads headlines out loud most mornin’s?”

Dimly, Elmer registered the thought that he’d never told anyone that he couldn’t read, that letters on a page didn’t stay still for him. Jack was the only one who knew, and that was because he’d guessed after Elmer asked the headline several days in a row. Apparently, there’d been boys like him before.

Buttons shrugged, “That don’t make ya stupid. You’s good enough at math to make up for it, anyway, and even if ya can’t read it, you speak two languages. What makes ya stupid is pickin’ fights you can’t handle, constantly.”

Elmer groaned. This again? He thought they’d already covered this.

“My family wouldn’t miss me if I didn’t come home, Buttons, so—“

“And what about everyone else?” Buttons interrupted, “El, maybe your family wouldn’t, but what about Jojo? What about Race, huh? What about me?”

Elmer shrugged, “You wouldn’t have to patch me up anymore.”

He stood up, but it was definitely too fast as purple spots swam before his eyes.

“Oh, shit...”

Buttons tried to catch him as he collapsed, but that just ended in both of them hitting the floor.

“Sorry,” Elmer mumbled against his friend’s chest. He was really tired.

“Nothin’ to be sorry for,” Buttons muttered, and Elmer felt him sigh, “I just... don’t see how ya don’t see it.”

“See what?”

Being curious was helping him want to stay awake.

“Y’know how it is when Crutchie smiles?” Buttons asked quietly, “Really smiles. Not when he’s bein’ sarcastic.”

Elmer nodded, then winced as he regretted it, “It’s like someone lit a candle in the dark.”

“Yeah. That’s how it is.”

Buttons was silent for a second, and Elmer wondered if he was asleep, and they were just going to take a nap on the floor.

“Yours is like that, only... God, Elmer, it’s like someone put the goddamn sun in your smile.”

Elmer was processing things pretty slowly right now, but he was pretty sure he’d be confused even if he wasn’t.

“What?”

“It’s amazing,” Buttons whispered, “It’s like a minute of summer in the middle of winter, but better. It makes everybody else want to smile, too. I wish I could show you, but mine don’t do that.”

“Sure it does,” Elmer mumbled, “I like your smile.”

“Thanks, but it’s not like yours.”

“Your smile is like...” Elmer tried to think through his headache, “Like when the trees start gettin’ green again in spring. I ain’t much good with words, but it’s that.”

Buttons was silent for a second, and when Elmer looked up, he was... he was a little red in the face.

They both sat up, but stayed on the floor.

Elmer was a little surprised when Buttons’s hand found his, but it felt right, so he didn’t pull away.

“How would you feel if ya never saw my smile again, El?”

He frowned, “I don’t wanna imagine it.”

“Okay, well...” Buttons sighed, “I don’t wanna imagine not seein’ your smile, either. So if ya won’t be careful for yourself or your family... do it for me?”

Elmer’s thoughts were still a bit fuzzy, but he was pretty sure he had a grasp of what was going on.

He’d been a newsie since he was 10, and he’d noticed how the older boys usually started getting interested in girls around 13 or 14.

Or, some of them started getting interested in boys. Which, as Manhattan’s old leader had explained it, was dangerous but natural, even if they had to keep it a secret.

Elmer was 15, now, and Buttons was the same age. He was just now realizing that as his friends’ eyes started getting drawn to girls or boys on the street, or each other, in more than a couple cases, he’d never really focused on anyone besides Buttons.

There was a weird feeling in his stomach, but not like he was going to throw up. It was more like... butterflies.

Elmer has done some pretty dumb things—mostly at the encouragement of friends—over the years, but he wasn’t stupid enough not to recognize what he was feeling, and...

Well, he wasn’t sure, but the look in Buttons’s eyes looked almost like how Blink looked at Mush and Jojo looked at Mike.

But he was kind of loopy right now, and not sure enough to act on it.

“I’ll try to be careful. For you.”

Buttons smiled, “Thanks. Next time you’re about to do somethin’ stupid, consider how you’d feel if it was me doin’ it.”

That was actually a good point.

“Uh, Buttons?”

Buttons stopped on the way out the door of the washroom, “Yeah?”

“Thanks for always patchin’ me up.”

“No problem, El.”

#newsies #belmerttons #buttons x elmer #buttons davenport #elmer kasprzak #angst #during strike #violet’s writing

[leeholtwrites]

Magical Girl Reunion Tour - C6

Sarah 

Sometimes there seemed to never be enough space in her bag. Sarah hiked her bag back up on her shoulder as she climbed the steps to her small apartment. She wished she lived in a building with an elevator, but it was one of the many prices she paid for chasing her academic aspirations. At least her studio was large, if a bit strangely shaped. It had been remodeled before she moved in, and she quite enjoyed having her own small washer and dryer stacked by the fridge in its own alcove.

She unlocked her door. Once inside, she heaved her bag onto her bed and sighed in relief. Sarah had some time before office hours, so she'd thought she'd come home and eat while going over some of her dissertation work which was code for hunkering over left over take out while watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the fifth time with a notebook and a scowl. Sarah was beginning to think that doing a deep dive into the representation of women in late nineties and early two thousands genre television wasn't so good. What hadn't been talked about already? She tried to convince herself that her own magical experiences hadn't influenced her decision, but all she as doing was lying to herself.

The glass top of her stove clicked when she set a skillet on one of the burners. She turned it on and added some oil before opening the fridge to retrieve the box of left over sweet potato fries from the day before. She placed the box on the small square of counter and stared off to the other side of the room as she waited for the pan to heat. Looking over her possessions on the shelves framing the window on the other side of the room allowed her brain some time to focus as she catalogued her collection of books, shows, movies, and things. Academic tomes on feminism and film, sometimes both. The occasional fiction book. Seasons and seasons of shows, because she was one of those hardcopy people, most of them bent in a fantasy or science fiction direction. The worn copies of Veronica Mars always stood out.  Movies were a different story. She only had so much space, so many of her films crowded hard drives instead of her precious shelf space, but she did have a few precious ones. Amongst her media - usually shoved in front of it - were a couple of photo frames and the occasional Funko Pop, gifts from friends. The photos were of her family, and one was of her high school friends in between the magic crime fighting.

Next to that photo lay her wand. She had long ago wondered if hiding it would have been smarter. The truth, she discovered, is that everyone thought it was some prop from some obscure genre show, maybe an anime. It's bright blue diamond textured handle, and pale blue orb patterned in little gold arrow heads could only be found in blurry twenty year old newspaper photos, but no one really questioned it. If they did, she said she made it up.

She crossed her arms and pursed her lips. Now that she had time to think, things had felt a little off lately. For one, her friend and down the hall neighbor Michelle hadn't sent her one cat gif in the last two days, and that was unlike her. Normally, her program coder friend would bounce down the hall at random or throw open her door to wave at Sarah as she headed off to class. Michelle was also a graduate student, albeit way more perky and put together that Sarah herself felt. Michelle was life and loved her work. And that is why she was worried.

She knew she was home, Sarah could hear Michelle's taste in obscure bands blaring through her door, no doubt upsetting the rest of her neighbors. She looked down at the sad box of sweet potato fries. No, today she would see if Michelle wanted something to eat. Maybe get her out of her apartment.

In the bathroom, she brushed out her wavy dark hair - resisting the temptation to tie it back up in a messy bun - and cleaned her glasses. She arranged her bag for her afternoon schedule. Now a lot lighter, tossed it over her shoulder. With her hand on her door knob, she paused and turned back to her shelves. Something was telling her to grab her wand. It was probably her intuition. It had always been pretty solid. Slipping her wand into her bag, she marched down the hall to Michelle's apartment.

"Michelle?" she called as she knocked. "It's Sarah. Want to go for lunch?"

No answer.

"Michelle?"

"Go away!"

Her hand hovered over the door. What? That was so unlike Michelle. Normally it was her  yelling at Michelle to go away when she was struggling with some particularly hairy bit of theory. She hesitated, then knocked again. "Come on Michelle. Come eat. Then you can get back to whatever your doing."

The door flew open. Sarah recoiled from what she saw. Michelle stood framed by the door frame, gaunt and grey with dark circles around feral eyes. Her red hair was dirty and unkempt, and she still wore the clothes Sarah had last seen her in. Behind her, her massive computer set up glowed with an eerie light. Sarah narrowed her eyes. She knew what Michelle's computer set up looked like when she was working, and that wasn't it.

"Fuck off, Sarah," Michelle snarled. "All you do is get between me and my work with your… friendship."

Michelle tried to slam the door in Sarah's face, but she caught it. From Michelle's appearance, Sarah imagined she would be much weaker, but there was something supernaturally strong about her. A thought began to itch at the back of Sarah's brain. A thought she didn't like.

With a all her body weight, she shoved Michelle's door open. Michelle stumbled back into her studio apartment. It was the same size as Sarah's, so she practically stumbled into her desk chair, catching herself at the last moment on the edge of her desk.

"You're going to regret that," Michelle sneered.

"Look, you're sick," Sarah said placating, her hands up. "Did you find some strange magical device, uh, thing. It can look like anything. Maybe it was something that gave you a bad feeling, but you touched it anyway. It told you it would make you great. It would give you the skills you needed to achieve your dream. It knew your insecurities. It knew just what to say."

By Michelle’s hand, her mouse unfurled. It grew legs, six from by Sarah's guess and skittered up Michelle's arm. Michelle cried out in shock. Sarah rushed forward to pull it off her before it could reach the back of Michelle's neck. She grabbed her friend by the left shoulder and began to reach over her. With her unnatural strength, Michelle shoved her away. She tripped over the edge of a rug, smashing into the door frame, and spun around to land face down in the hall. Her bag had fallen off in the tumble, spilling its contents next to her. In the hall's dim lights, her wand glowed softly.

Michelle screamed. Sarah looked over her shoulder. The place where she had hit the door frame protested. She grit her teeth, ignoring it. She had to see.

The mouse had latched onto the back of Michelle’s neck and grown. Chitinous growths sprung from her neck and along her shoulders, slowly expanding down her arms and over her chest. It was the shiny black of the tech it had impersonated. Worry and dread ran through Sarah. Hitting someone covered in the stuff was like punching steel, and trying to hang onto her would be nearly impossible. The device would turn Michelle almost superhuman. There was only one answer.

She reached her hand out towards her wand, scooting forward, her hand outstretched. It flared the moment her fingers brushed it. Warmth flooded through her and a strange wash of joy. Sarah had long suspected that the wands might have their own feelings, but now was not the time to dwell on it. With the wand now firmly in her hand, she jumped to her feet, her wand in the air, and shouted, “Dress me in patience!”

Time slowed. Her arms stretched, one before her and one behind, as glittery golden light ran along them. In its wake soft, shiny gloves covered her once chipped nail polish. The light spread to her torso. She spun on her toes. The light revealed a vibrant blue short sleeved tunic, an enormous voluminous bow of soft blue at her throat. She kicked a leg up, drawn by the golden light. Bright blue, knee high boots and soft white leggings. Her arms over her head, she spun again, her loose hair drawn into an elegant braid, a gold band across her forehead. With a flash, she struck a pose. “I will not stop till this fight is through!”

Sarah tried to ignore how silly she felt. At least she had pants this time.

Michelle roared, if Sarah could even call her Michelle anymore. Her eyes were pure black and her skin had grown even whiter. The black growths had spread, giving her a tech-like armored look, all shiny black plates. “A Defender. How predictable.” She said, her voice layered with whatever magi-tech parasite the mouse had been.

Sarah held her wand out in her left hand. “Reveal your true form!” Another flash of glittery gold and she held a bow, soft blue with gold filigree. She grabbed the string with her right hand and drew it back, a streak of iridescent light appearing in place of an arrow. “Let Michelle go.”

The creature laughed, a twisted smile on its lips. “Did you really think I would make it that easy?” It spun around and dove out the window.

A scream wanted jump from Sarah’s lips. She tamped it down, dropping her right hand and running for the broken window. Fighting the urge to stop, she threw herself out into the air, spinning to face the sky. She grabbed her string, pulled, and shouted “Rainbow braid!” She let go. A streak of rainbow light shot towards the top of her building, embedding in the brick. She grabbed the line as it solidified and slid along it to the ground, moving much faster than she wanted to. Swallowing another scream, she hit the ground in a roll. Sarah jumped to her feet just in time to see the black armor of the creature, now having entirely swallowed Michelle, charging down the street still laughing.

Sarah dashed after her, arms pumping, the pain in her back forgotten. With her magically enhanced abilities, she caught up to the creature quickly. The creature hadn’t just been running from her. It had been busy. A cloud of technical components surrounded her. Broken bits of cell phone screens, computer boards, SD cards, and other bits stolen from the screaming crowd orbited the creature as she whipped around to face Sarah.

The pieces began combine, turning into four orbiting satellites. There was the gleam of camera lenses, the glitter of metal, the shine of the black material that covered Michelle. The creature had used a piece of itself to create whatever circled it now. Sarah wasn’t going to find out. She raised her bow, the streak of light appearing when she drew the string, and fired. The magical arrow bounced off an invisible force before the creature, leaving a blue ripple in its wake. She fired a couple more times. Same effect.

The creature laughed in its strange voice. And then it multiplied. Four of the armor-plated creatures stood before her. Sarah struggled not to look dumb-struck. The parasites drew on their host’s passions, their work. What had Michelle been working on again? Some kind of encrypted security software that automatically made back-ups of whatever the user was working on. And protected it.

She swallowed a curse. Defenders didn’t curse, openly. That explained the copies, the armor, and the force field. It had been a long time since she longed to be surrounded by her team, but now the feeling threatened to swallow her. Sure, she kept in touch with them, still played virtual Dungeons and Dragons with Shonda, but as friends. The barely even talked about their magical girl soldier days, and actively avoided speaking about Maggie.

God-damned Maggie, who she would need to defeat this parasite properly.

Her hand brushed her hip, feeling for her phone. She could at least call Shonda or Chloe or Kelsey for backup. Unfortunately, it was still on the floor in her building’s hallway outside Michelle’s room.

“Well, of fucking course,” she muttered.

#magical girl reunion tour #magicalgirlreuniontour #female protagonist #women over 30 #so much fun

[chinateacup]

Commission for @asrasdarling

Thank you so much for commissioning me again @asrasdarling !! Repeat customers are so rare for me, and I’m so happy you liked my stuff enough to want more :,) anyways, here’s 3k of a fluffy high school au. Enjoy!

((my commissions are still open btw))

Fandom: The Arcana

Characters: Asra, Julian, Portia, OC

Pairings: Asra/OC

Rating: No rating required

Jenna showed the bus driver her pass, and took the nearest open seat.

Why was she so nervous? She wasn’t doing anything she’d never done before. Her hair was done the same way it always was, her outfit wasn’t anything that special, and she was on the same bus she got on every day to get to school.

Except, of course, she wasn’t going to school. She was going to Asra’s house.

Jenna bit her lip. When people asked, she always said their relationship was complicated. That was an exaggeration, and she knew it. They were friends, and she loved that they were. Asra was kind, and thoughtful, and was always super helpful with homework.

But he also had painfully soft skin, and a smile that turned her brain to jelly mid-thought. Much less helpful with homework.

Jenna took a breath, willing her heart to stop beating so fast, and recalled their conversation this morning.

“Hey!”

Jenna smiled against her pillow at the familiar voice. “Hey yourself,” she said into the phone.

“Sorry it’s so early.” Asra sounded surprisingly awake. He wasn’t usually a morning person… she suspected his mom had dragged him out of bed before noon. “But I forgot to mention the homework you missed Thursday. We have ten pages to analyse.”

“Wait, what?” Jenna sat up bolt upright. “Is that due tomorrow?”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” He whined. “I got distracted! Julian found a four-legged beetle in biology and we thought it might be scientific discovery.”

She rolled her eyes, smiling involuntarily. “Was it a scientific discovery?”

“No, Jenna, the beetle died. Then we had to give it a funeral, and…” Asra trailed off. “Anyway, that’s why I forgot to tell you. The grief must have really affected me.”  

She snorted. “Yeah, you sound all torn up.”

“I’m sorry…” he mumbled. “Hey, how about you come over today? I’ll help you go over it?” Jenna opened her mouth to reply. “Or before school tomorrow,” he added quickly. “Whatever you like.”

“Today works great,” she said, immediately blushing. Did that sound too eager?

“Great!” Asra said, sounding very eager indeed. “You remember my address. See you a bit!”

He hung up the phone, and Jenna sighed, flopping back against her pillow.

She was still turning the call over in her mind when she hopped off the bus, walked up the porch, and knocked twice on the heavy wooden door.

It swung open a moment later. Asra beamed down at her, and she smirked back. “Are you wearing pyjamas?”

“Good morning to you too,” he held out an arm, beckoning her inside and noticing the cups in her hand. “Ooh, did you bring tea?”

“It’s not tea.”

His nose wrinkled as he shut the door. “I don’t really drink coffee.”

Jenna shoved a cup into his hand. “Hot cocoa?”

Asra gasped like she had opened the Heavens for him. “You’re an angel. Thank you.” He cradled the cup in his hands, and started up the stairs. “Come on, let’s go before you get me all distracted.”

Jenna groaned, but followed him up the carpeted stairway. At the end of the landing, Asra flicked his light on, and kicked some clothes under the bed. His room was the same as Jenna remembered; wallpapered with posters and tapestries, plush red carpet, a tiny fold-out table. It wasn’t a huge room, and it had clearly taken some creativity to fit two chairs at the desk.

Somehow, even though she’d been here before, the room felt… different. The last time, Asra’s parents had been right downstairs. A few friends had been with them, and they had still insisted on the door staying open. At least fifteen centimetres, they’d said.

Asra shut the door behind them.

Jenna swallowed.

But if something felt different to Asra too, he was doing a great job hiding it. They sat at the desk, and Asra grabbed the script from Jenna’s bag, skimming over the notes she had already made. He chewed his lip as he read.

“You’re actually half-way done,” he said finally, breaking the silence and flipping open his own work. “If you want to answer the question of the characters’ motivations, that is, Stanley’s is good. You just need to do Stella’s.”

“Well, thank you very much,” Jenna teased. “Do you think we’ll be done with this play before we’re dead and buried?”

“We will be if your wonderful friend can remind you about the homework,” Asra jabbed, though it had no real heat behind it. “So, Stanley as a character is a typical, domineering male. His motivation in his relationship with Stella is not love, it’s the ability and power that comes with exercising control. He is happy with Stella, as long as she doesn’t step out of line and allows him to… Jenna?”

“Hm?” Jenna looked up from her phone.

Asra closed his eyes, and she half expected him to be mad at her. But he just chuckled, shaking his head. “Anyway, we know that’s what he gets out of it,” he continued with a smile. “What about Stella?”

Jenna inhaled slowly. She’d torn himself away from her phone, but that look on Asra’s face was proving to be a way more lethal distraction. Dimples. “Uh, well, she… loves him, right? And she’s pregnant, so it’s not like she can leave him that easy even if she wanted.”

Asra hummed under his breath. “You think she loves him?”

Jenna paused. “…I don’t think that’s the right word. No, she doesn’t love him, but there is something about him… pulling her in…”

His lips twitched. “Attraction?”

“Yeah, that’s it,” she nodded, making a note of it on her script. “Stella is drawn in by this chemistry they have between them. It’s just like Blanche and Mitch; they make all the excuses to see each other that they can, and when we see them back at the house, it’s obvious they’re trying to skirt around the subject, since Mitch is so awkward about it and Blanche doesn’t wanna scare him off, but at the end of the day, both of them have to accept that there’s this obvious…”

Jenna finished writing and looked up, only to find Asra had been watching her face the entire time. When their eyes met, Asra blushed, startled, but didn’t look away.

“…Tension,” he finished for her.

Jenna nodded. “Yeah. That.”

Asra licked his lips, cheeks still bitten with colour, and went right back to his own extract. “I hadn’t really thought about that.”

The room felt warmer suddenly, and Jenna took off her sweater, draping it over the back of the chair. Asra glanced over her top curiously, but said nothing. “So, um, aside from Stanley’s abuse,” Jenna said. “Stella has some attraction to him. I mean, they’re compatible partners.”

“Yep. Compatible. Very true.”

It was around that time, when Asra’s face was tinged pink and those little dimples were forming at the corner of his mouth, that Jenna realised she wanted to kiss him.

And she had no clue how to make that happen.

She’d never really… well, maybe a couple of people had shown interest but no one she’d ever returned feelings for. She’d never had a boyfriend, not a real one anyways, and she didn’t know what routine she was meant to do to get one. She didn’t know the rules. How do you ask someone out? How had she made it to eighteen without asking anyone out?!

Jenna drummed her fingers on the desk. “Asra?”

“Yes?” He looked up.

Jenna took a breath. Held it. “Nothing.” She nodded at Asra’s cup. “That’s gonna get cold. You should drink up.”

“Right, yes. I will,” He nodded, smiling politely, and took a sip of cocoa.

He didn’t speak again for a while.

Jenna didn’t really think anything of it, since Asra had always been quiet when he was focusing. He hummed in response to questions, high pitch for yes, low for no. Over lunch, she was glued to her phone anyway, and didn’t notice much around her.

It wasn’t until Jenna had finally shut her book and rested her head on the desk that she noticed they hadn’t spoken for hours.

“We did it,” she tried, giving a lazy thumbs up.

“It only took five times longer than it should have,” Asra laughed shorty, stretching his arms out like a cat.

“Well, that doesn’t really matter, does it?” Jenna spun in the office chair. “I mean, it’s a pretty good excuse to hang out together.” Asra hummed, and she pursed her lips, thinking. “Can I ask you a question?”

He hesitated. “Yes. Of course you can.”

“…Have you ever had a girlfriend? Or boyfriend, or…?”

Asra shook his head. “No. I mean, not… not a real one. I don’t think you could call what Ilya and I had a relationship.”

She chuckled and rolled her eyes, stopping when they hit the ceiling. “Have you ever been in love?”

The question surprised Jenna herself, and she blushed, not quite meeting Asra’s eyes. When she did though, they were surprisingly calm. “No.”

Jenna nodded, mind about a million miles away from her body. When it came back, he was speaking. “Sorry, what was that?”

“Been in love.” he was asking. “Have you ever?”

“Oh,” She picked at her already chipped nail polish. “No, me neither.”

Asra shrugged. “Well, we’re eighteen. I guess we have plenty of time to...” he faltered. “You know.”

“Guess so.”

There was a pause where she thought to voice something unspoken between them. But then a beat passed, and she’d already missed her shot.

“It’s coming up to six,” Asra noted. “Where were you thinking for dinner?”

Oh God, anything. Anywhere you want. With you. “Portia and Julian are actually picking me up from here. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if you came with?”

“Oh. Sure, dinner with Portia and Ilya sounds fun.” Was it wishful thinking, or did he sound disappointed they wouldn’t be alone? “Did they say what time they’d be here?”

“No.”

“Right.”

“…I’m sure it won’t be long.”

Half an hour later, Jenna was sat crossed-legged on the bed, and the Devoraks still hadn’t showed. “Tight spaces? Really?”

“Mmhm. I hate them.” Asra sat mirroring her.

“I said weirdest fear! Everyone has some claustrophobia.”

“You told me I had to answer honestly, and you’ve already broken the rules by asking more than twenty questions! I don’t have any weird fears.” He bumped his arm against Jenna’s briefly, before pulling away. Even that casual touch was enough to set off every nerve in her body. “It’s your turn. What’s your weirdest fear?”

“Ducks.”

“Ducks?”

“When I was eight, I got like, swarmed by those things at the lake. One of them bit me on the ankle. I literally thought I was gonna die. Don’t you dare laugh at me, it’s not funny!”

“Sorry, sorry,” Asra’s voice shook, but he managed to steel his expression into a tight smile. “I’m not laughing at you.”

“Of course you’re not,” She huffed, lying back against the pillows. “Um… alright, most surprising talent, go.”

Asra barely had to think for a moment. “I can tumble.”

Jenna gasped. “No, you can’t!”

“Well, I could tumble when I was twelve,” he shrugged. “One of my friends in middle school was a gymnast. I had a knack for it.”

“You’re showing me.”

“There’s no room here.”

“We are going to the dance studio first thing in the morning, and you’re showing me.”

“It’s your turn now.”

“Oh, moving along quickly now, are we–?”

“Your turn, Jenna! Most surprising talent.”

She shifted against the pillow, folding her hands on her stomach. “Give me another one.”

“I answered, so you have to.”

“I don’t have any surprising talents!” She said at the ceiling. There was a shift of weight as Asra lay down next to her, and she tried to ignore it, even as she felt herself being watched. “I must just be great at everything.”

He chuckled. “I don’t doubt it.”

There was a long stretch of silence, and Jenna closed her eyes.

“So, earlier…” Asra spoke slowly, in a voice that didn’t sound quite like his own. “You said that you’d never been in love.”

“That’s true, yes.”

“Right. But is there…” He shifted against the pillow. She opened her eyes. “Is there anyone that you…?”

Asra was the type of person that was hard to lie to. So Jenna didn’t even consider it. “Yes.”

“Oh,” he said quietly.

“Do you?” She asked immediately to stop him from thinking any more on it.

“I… no, no I don’t.”

“Cool.” This wasn’t a surprise. This wasn’t news. Jenna had no reason to believe he would be interested, and there was zero evidence that he ever was or ever will be. This was not a surprise.

Why had that hurt more than it should?

“This person,” Asra asked, even though it wasn’t his turn. She didn’t want to correct him. “Do they go to our school?”

“Yeah,” She said. “He does. He’s in our year.” A beat passed between them. “Ah, are you a cat person or dog person?”

“Cat person,” he replied. “If he’s in our year, do I know him?”

“Yeah. You know him,” Jenna swallowed, turning on her side so she could see him. Asra did the same, his expression flushed and unreadable. They lay face-to-face. “Who’s your favourite band?”

“Paramore.” Asra sounded distracted. “What’s he like?”

“He’s nice. And smart. He’s always been super friendly with me, I just… guess I’m being selfish wanting more,” she chuckled. “Go-to soda?”

“Sprite. How long have you felt this way?”

“Since we met,” she muttered. “I mean, I’ve always thought he was cute and stuff, but when I got to know him better, he was… actually really amazing.” Jenna hadn’t once broken Asra’s gaze. Her heart felt ready to leap out of her chest. “Favourite food?”

“Pumpkin pie.” Both their voices were hushed, like they were sharing secrets. Like they were scared they’d be overheard, even though they were alone. “Why do you think you’re being selfish?”

“Because I should be happy with his friendship, and I’m not. It’s different. I want his undivided attention. I want to know him.” She took a breath. “Star sign?”

“Gemini. You’re not selfish.”

“I think I am.”

“You’re not. You’re right, it is different.”

“Pets?”

“A snake. Are you going to tell him?”

“Do you think I should?”

“Do you think he does?”

“I just asked.”

“Then yes.”

“What’s your favourite colour?”

Then there was a hand under Jenna’s chin, and Asra was kissing her.

It wasn’t a great kiss. It was clumsy, and unfocused, and Asra’s aim was a little off since they were both lying on their sides. And then it was over much too quickly, and she barely had time to open her eyes before his hand left her jaw.

“I, um…” Asra’s voice shook, pulling away, sitting back against the headboard. “Jen, I don’t…”

Jenna moved up with him, and cupped his face to kiss him properly. Asra’s eyes shut lazily, shoulders relaxing with relief, and she brought her fingers to the nape of his neck, tangling them in short, soft curls. Asra’s hands hovered nervously at her waist, unsure where to put them, before settling on holding her wrists, thumb brushing against her skin.

The kiss broke when they both ran out of breath, and Jenna tried a shaky smile. “…So, I think we have some stuff to clear up.”

Asra nodded. “You did mean me, right? Or have I badly misread this?”

“It’s you,” She laughed breathlessly. “And when you said you didn’t like anyone right now…?”

“I lied,” he confirmed. “I swear one day I’ll stop screwing up, and I’ll stop saying the wrong thing. I’ve just liked you for so long, I-I… I’m only half convinced this isn’t a dream!” He laughed shortly, flustered. “I really hope this is real. I want to know you too, Jenna. And I want to be known. By you, obviously.”

Her hands found his. “You do?”

“I do.”

“Oh my God.” Jenna grinned brilliantly, and pulled Asra into another kiss. It was shorter than the last one, since she suspected he hadn’t quite gotten his breath back, but when she went to break it, Asra chased her lips, pulling her right back in.

She sighed against his mouth. “This might be my new favourite thing.”

“Same here,” Asra murmured, kneeling up when she did and wrapping his arms around her torso. When she deepened the kiss, though, his legs buckled, and they fell back against the bed with a laugh.

Asra looked up, red-faced and breathless, as she gently placed her glasses on the bedside table. “You’re so beautiful.”

“You’re so beautiful,” Jenna said against his skin, trailing her lips across his cheek, past his jawline and his throat. Asra laughed, muttering that it tickled, and she snorted, holding his waist to pull him in closer and –

BZZT. BZZT.

They both froze, staring at what little space remained between them. Asra blinked. “Is that your phone?”

Jenna scowled, sitting up and detangling their legs to grab her phone from the end of the bed. She pressed it to her ear. “Hello?”

“Hello, Jenna? We’re outside!” Julian had to yell against the sound of the traffic. “Would you mind asking Asra to open the door? It’s freezing out here!”

She huffed, still getting her breath back. “Where were you two? I called you both like, three times.”

“Ah, yes, very sorry. I apparently had it on silent all day, and... oh, Pasha says the door’s unlocked – hey, no, at least knock first!”

“Anybody home?” Jenna heard Portia yell from downstairs.

“Crap.” Jenna hung up, scrambling off the bed. “They’re coming up!”

Asra looked panicked, and dove to sit at his desk, smoothing over his hair as best he could. She did the same, replacing her glasses and fanning herself with her hands. Asra frowned. “What are you doing?”

“Trying to make my face less red.”

“It’s making it worse.”

“Well, at least I’m trying, you’re definitely redder!”

Asra blushed darker, wiped away the gloss she had kissed onto his mouth, and someone knocked just as she was taking out her ruined ponytail.

Portia poked her head around the door, looked between them and smiled. “Great, looks like Asra’s coming! Your taxi’s here.”

Julian followed her in, looking sheepish. “I did tell her to knock.”

Asra breathed a small sigh. “It’s okay. Thanks for driving us all.”

“It’s no trouble. I knew Jenna would probably be tired from, uh, studying with you.” He smirked slightly, and kept his eyes on the carpet.

Portia shot Jenna a look, so small anyone else would have missed it. She didn’t. “Yeah, studying. Glad you guys had a fun day.”

They followed the siblings down the staircase, and Asra locked the front door behind them. Jenna leaned in close so he couldn’t hear her whisper. “You two totally know, don’t you?”

Julian snickered, and Portia grinned. “In the car, you’re telling us everything.”

#the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana asra #asra alzanar #asra x oc #the arcana julian #julian devorak #the arcana portia #portia devorak #the arcana fic #the arcana commission

[trueromantic1]

“You’re a god damn mistake, that’s what you are.”

Maddie, I hope you like it. And I hope everyone enjoys me taking such an angst prompt and making it fluffier.

****

Sitting in the dark at the kitchen island, contemplating the five things she’d pulled from the fridge, was not what she’d expected to be doing at 2AM on a Tuesday night. But at just about 14 weeks pregnant, that’s where she now found herself. She’d woken up an hour earlier with the sudden urge to pee, but then she found herself wandering into the kitchen to see if there was anything she could find for a quick late night snack. She could just wake Chimney up, she knew he wouldn’t mind, but he had to be up for a shift in a few hours and she wanted to let him get all the sleep he could. It’s not like he could explain what made him so tired when he got to work, not without jumping the gun, since they’d decided to wait until the pre Fourth of July party that weekend to tell everyone.

It had been nice though, having such an amazing secret just between them. She couldn’t wait to share it with their loved ones, but it being just the two of them had made it so real. Instead of watching movies, one of their favorite pastimes since her boyfriend had decided her movie knowledge was severely lacking all those months ago when they’d first met, they found themselves talking about the baby, and where they hoped their life together would go. One night he’d told her that he hoped it was a girl, because Mr. and Mrs. Lee had kept a bunch of stuff that had belonged to his mother, like dressers and decorations, and he wanted to put them in a daughter’s room. And she’d told him that she really didn’t care, but she was glad it was happening with him, because she’d lived in fear for years of bringing a child into the world with Doug as its father. Little things, secrets just for them, that she knew would still happen once everyone knew, but felt somehow more theirs when no one else knew.

But that’s what led her to this moment; staring at a bunch of food items without any idea what to do with them. So far she hadn’t had any real cravings, but she knew that didn’t usually start until around 13 weeks anyway. It seemed they’d decided to hit in the middle of the night, when they didn’t have much in the fridge due to their busy schedules the last couple weeks. She didn’t really know what she wanted, so she’d just grabbed everything that sounded good. It’d seemed like a good idea at the time, but now she was left with an assortment of foods that she was pretty sure should never be eaten together, let alone mixed, which was actually sounding better and better the longer she stared. Deciding to just go for it, she grabbed a plate and spoon and started dishing things out. Placing a tortilla from the package in the breadbox on the plate, she added a good grating of parmesan cheese. She spooned banana peppers and kimchi in extra large helpings on top of the cheese. After taking a whiff of the orange chicken leftover from when they’d ordered Chinese the other night, she dumped the rest of it on top of everything else on the tortilla. After a healthy squirt of ketchup, she wrapped it all up. It smelled awful, and looked worse, but it had all sounded good when she put it on the counter, so she decided to throw caution to the wind and take a large bite.

“Hmmm...Not bad baby. Maybe you do have good taste. But we are never telling Uncle Buck about this. He’ll never let us live it down, and will probably tell all your friends that it’s your favorite meal.And let’s just keep it between the two of us what happened to the rest of Daddy’s kimchi from Mrs. Lee.” She continued talking to the baby, babbling from one topic to another as she finished her snack. It really was surprisingly delicious, considering she didn’t normally even like kimchi or banana peppers. As she polished off the last bite, she turned back to the fridge for something to wash it all down with. “Hmm...What do you think we should have? We’ve got milk, water, apple juice, orange juice, some of that weird health drink your Uncle Buck likes...Looks like your Uncle Albert left some of his bananamilk here too…” She stared into the fridge, trying to decide what she wanted. She’d been on a bit of a milk kick lately, but that just didn’t seem appetizing right now. Her eyes were drawn back to the bananamilk, so she pulled it out and turned back to the counter after grabbing a glass. As the liquid poured out, she wrinkled her nose, realizing bananas were going to be yet another thing she hated that the baby was going to make her crave. She wondered if her stomach was really going to be able to handle the astonishing mix of foods she’d put in it in the last 45 minutes. “You’re a goddamn mistake, that’s what you are.”

“Maddie? Why would you say that?” The voice came from behind her, startling her enough she almost dropped the glass on its way to her mouth. She wasn’t sure why he sounded so upset, but maybe he’d just gotten worried when he woke up and she was gone. She put the glass down carefully and turned toward him.

“Howie! Was I too loud? I was trying not to wake you up; I know you have to get up for your shift soon. I just woke up really needing to pee, and then I was just so hungry, so I decided to raid the fridge.” He didn’t respond, just staring at her with a distraught look on his face. She took a step closer, but he flinched back. “Howie? What’s the matter? You’re scaring me?”

“Is that really how you feel? I thought you were happy about the baby.” He wasn’t looking at her, keeping his eyes trained somewhere over her shoulder. His words confused her though, because of course she was happy about the baby; she’d told him so just that night.

“What are you talking about? I told you, I’m thrilled about the baby. I’m a little surprised, because we didn’t plan it, but I’m so happy we’re having it. Why would you think I wasn’t happy?” She almost stepped to him again, wanting to comfort him, to take away whatever had put that awful look on his face, but the memory of him moving away from her held her back. She wrung her hands together instead, anxious that she’d done something to upset him.

“I heard you. When I was coming into the kitchen. You said it was a goddamn mistake. How could you ever say that Maddie?” He came slowly into the kitchen, still not looking directly at her, stopping just out of arms reach. She didn’t think she’d ever seen this look on his face, even more distraught then when he realized Hen might eventually be leaving him. But she was still confused, and couldn't figure out how to fix it.

“Seriously, what are you talking about? I would never call our baby a mistake! It may have been a surprise, but that doesn’t make it a mistake! I can’t believe you’d-Oh, Howie, no.” She let out a laugh, realizing what had happened. “No, Howie, I wasn’t calling the baby a mistake; I promise.” She took a few steps toward him, glad he didn’t flinch this time. He slowly lowered his eyes to hers.

“But I heard you Maddie. Just now, that’s what you said.” She could see that he wanted to believe her, but she could understand his hesitancy.

“No, I was talking to the milk. It’s Albert’s babanamilk. The baby wanted it. I was talking about how it was probably going to be a mistake drinking the bananamilk after the mix of other things I’d already eaten. I just made a burrito of orange chicken, banana peppers, parmesan cheese, kimchi, and ketchup. I couldn’t imagine how my stomach was going to handle that, nevermind the bananamilk I was about to add to it.” She could see when he believed her, the distraught look easing into a grin. He laughed as he grabbed her, carefully pulling her into a hug.

“I’m sorry I doubted you Maddie. I didn’t think you thought that, that’s why I was so upset. This baby already means so much to me, and  I thought it did to you too, so I couldn’t understand why you would tell it that it was a mistake.” He kissed her forehead before leaning his against it. “I’m also sorry our baby is making you crave the foods you can’t stand. Is it at least making them taste good to you?”

“I’ll forgive you this time, since you said you couldn’t understand it. I’ll chalk it up to lack of sleep on your part.” She huffed, allowing her body to lean into him more, knowing he’d take her weight. “As for the food, it’s not awful. I don’t know how they’d all taste on their own, or when the baby isn’t craving it, but right now it all tasted okay. And the bananamilk wasn’t horrible, at least the sip I had wasn’t. I just hope I’m able to keep it all down. I don’t want to know what it tastes like the second time around.” He pulled back some, kissing the tip of her nose. How about you finish your milk while I get rid of the rest of your dishes, and then we go back to bed for a couple more hours.”

She smiled, pecking his lips quickly, before she went back to her glass. As she watched him take her plate and silverware to the sink, singing a song quietly, she smiled. She took a few more sips, thinking about how far they’d both come, to be able to move on from such a potentially big thing so quickly. Feeling her stomach suddenly roll, hoping it would settle, though she wasn’t holding out much based on past experience, she realized maybe the bananamilk had been a mistake after all, but nothing else about her life right then was.

#maddieandchimney #maddie x chimney #911 fanfic #angst prompts #but not angst because it was more fun this way

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #432

Top Ten Games to Remaster

As we continue June’s videogame-themed series of Tops Ten – during what would normally have been E3, but is still something of a prolonged Videogame Announcement Season – I turn my attention once again to great games past. This has been exacerbated by the release of Command & Conquer Remastered Collection, a hi-def spit-and-polish re-do of two of the greatest PC games of the nineties. I have very fond teenage memories of both C&C and its pseudo-sequel, but Red Alert in particular strikes an important chord as one of “the” games that deepened and broadened by love of gaming as an art form. In the way that really only happens when you’re a kid, I absorbed Red Alert, not just completing the campaign and playing hours and hours of skirmish, but also talking about it extensively with friends, designing my own levels, and even going so far as to modify the source files to create my own super-units (nuclear tanks ahoy!). As such, it utterly delights me to declare that C&C Remastered is a phenomenal undertaking, the graphics painstakingly remade to fit modern displays, the interface masterfully tweaked to appease modern sensibilities. But at the same time it offers so many pleasing, knowing, considerate hat-tips to fans, such as a re-imagining of the classic DOS installation prompts. All in all, it’s a must-buy, bringing a 25-year-old series of games more-or-less bang up to date and preserving their legacy for a new generation.

Anyway, all this got me thinking of other classic games, and how it’s so difficult to play them nowadays. Maybe they’re mired in rights issues. Maybe it’s a technological minefield to get them to run on modern systems. Maybe elements of modern gaming – be it graphics or design – have simply passed them by, making them a far more difficult and frustrating experience than they would have seemed Back in the Day. Whatever the reason, these are games that – like classic films from the 40s and 50s – should be celebrated and enjoyed by the young’uns, not left to gather digital dust on forgotten floppies the world over.

So, with no further ado, here are ten games that I would love to see given a bit of digital TLC, renewed and revigorated for the ultra-wide monitors and liquid-cooled systems of tomorrow. In most cases these are just one game that I’d like to see spruced up and re-released, but there are a few “collections” here too, whether it’s a C&C-style pairing of a great double act, or a  celebration of a series, a la Halo: The Master Chief Collection.

Oh, and I’m on about remasters here: not a full-on remake or reboot. Stuff like Perfect Dark on the Xbox 360, not Doom 2016. Old games made good on modern hardware, not a reimagining of the property.

Regardless: have at it, games industry.

Lemmings (1991) and Lemmings 2: The Tribes (1993): I definitely think they should be a double-pack, because whilst the first is a well-regarded classic, the second refines the formula, makes it more user-friendly, offers skirmish-style training modes, and amps up the comedy. But they’re both ancient by now, and despite mobile do-overs in recent years, the originals are very difficult to play. Upping the resolution whilst still keeping the character of the scantily-pixelated sprites would be difficult, but it’d be worth it to once again sample one of the gods of gaming.

Sam & Max Hit the Road (1993): other LucasArts classic adventures have had a spruce – most notably the first two seminal Monkey Island games – but it’d be good to see this cult comedy classic come back to life. I don’t know if the backgrounds ever existed in higher resolution, but I’d love to see the sprites re-drawn to more closely resemble a cartoon version of Steve Purcell’s artwork.

The Jedi Knight Series (1995-2003): I’m bundling all four Jedi Knight games in together – that’s the original Dark Forces, plus Jedi Knight, Jedi Outcast, and Jedi Academy – but let’s be honest, it’s the first two we’re really after. DF gave us a compelling mission-based “Doom Clone” (back when Doom was a genre), and one which would be amazing to see tarted up to 4K with texture filtering a-go-go; but it was its 1997 sequel, Jedi Knight: Dark Forces II, that struck serious beskar. Huge, expansive levels, in “true 3D” (as we used to call it), full-motion video cutscenes, finally getting a lightsaber and Force powers, but most of all the Light/Dark Side dynamic offering (very basic) morality and a branching storyline. Again, giving it a glossy hi-def sheen would do wonders to preserve the legacy of one of the greatest Star Wars games of all time.

The Quake Collection (1996-2005): really it should be called The Quake Qollection, no? Encompassing all four mainline Quakes. Although, again, let’s be honest: there’s something deeply iconic about the first three, so no one would complain if we just forgot about part 4, yeah? Anyway: Quake was a stunner, a gorgeous 3D technical juggernaut, offering sumptuous lighting effects and gorgeous architecture. Part II came a year later and offered us coloured lighting and a coherent sci-fi story, whereas Quake III Arena in 1999 gave us a sublimely crafted multiplayer shooter and a character that was an eyeball doing a handstand. Despite being graphical powerhouses in their day, getting them to run can be a drag, so it’d be lovely to see them dragged into the 21st Century, especially if they could offer us ray-tracing on next-gen consoles, a la Quake II RTX.

Tomb Raider (1996): we’ve seen the series rebooted in (generally) excellent fashion, but at the same time it feels it lost a little of the majesty, mythos, and merriment of OG Lara. One of the first truly successful 3D games, it was like nothing before it. A subtle update to increase its resolution, filter the rough edges, maybe offer the option to move beyond the rigid grid-based movement structure, and possibly up the poly count so blocky Lara more closely resembles her rendered box-art cousin, would be terrific. Imagine the dinosaur in 4K…!

Descent (1994): one of those games that’s slipped from public consciousness, this was a full-3D shooter a couple of years before Quake shambled onto our screens. Piloting a craft in zero gravity, it offered full freedom of movement as well as a tense shooter dynamic coupled with some mild, X-Wing-style space sim elements. It was funky, fast, gorgeous, and messed with your head. I’d love a remake that kept the levels as-is, simplified the often-complex controls for modern sensibilities, and just in general made it look prettier. I worry that a contemporary “re-imagining” might lose too many of its crazy rough edges, though.

Syndicate (1993): there have been a number of efforts to re-do Syndicate over the years, but apart from its excellent sequel Syndicate Wars in 1996, none have matched the dark joys of the original. rather than try to go all modern and 3D, I’d rather see the artwork redone, redrawn at a higher resolution, perhaps offering subtle 3D touches such as dynamic light, shadow, and ray-tracing. The fiddlier aspects (getting into cars?!) could be tidied up, but the look and feel should remain the same. I honestly think this could be a big deal.

Total Annihilation (1997): if C&C can get remastered, why not the game that was arguably the first real challenger to its sci-fi RTS dominance? TA had 3D graphics, a new and refined model of base construction, and tactical touches such as line-of-sight and elevated terrain. But the comparatively low resolution of late-nineties machines meant that the robotic units could often appear slightly indistinct, turning into a grey melange; boosting the res and the poly count would do wonders, but – like C&C – the gameplay itself should be kept as authentic as possible.

Warcraft I & II (1994-95): I know, I know; they just did a remaster of Warcraft III that wasn’t well received and got everybody’s backs up. But I barely played Warcraft III (I barely played Warcraft I for that matter). Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness was the fantasy yin to C&C’s sci-fi yang, and it was great; clear, bright, fast, fun. The cartoony graphics were gorgeous and the units had bags of character (reinforced by the humorous soundbites when you kept clicking on them). I’d want to see the sprites re-drawn in hi-res, with the units given some gorgeous new animations to match their character. Other than that? Keep it broadly the same. It worked 25 years ago, it’ll work now.

Fantasy World Dizzy (1989): I nearly didn’t have a game this old on the list. For one thing, I thought pre-16-bit games would require far more retooling for modern audiences, becoming essentially the sort of reboot I said I wanted to avoid; I can’t imagine a new Skool Daze being too similar to its original. Also which Dizzy do you choose? The one I played the most was probably Spellbound (1991). But I think Fantasy World may be the most iconic. Its Amiga port was almost a remaster anyway, giving it gorgeous colour graphics. A modern version would up the resolution with all-new art assets, obviously, and perhaps could offer a more user-friendly jumping dynamic (and maybe – maybe – I’ll allow scrolling). This could be a lovely way to re-introduce audiences to the character of Dizzy, who should really be held up more as a British gaming mascot, without having to go all-in on a brand new title. Egg-cellent (sorry).

So there we are. There are a couple missing here, obviously; Simon the Sorcerer was nearly there until I realised they did do a gentle remaster in 2018. The Settlers would have made the list, except they are remaking that, although in my opinion it looks like a full-on reboot rather than the upgraded version of the original that I crave. Fade to Black just dropped off the bottom on the grounds that I barely played it in its original form, but a third-person 3D Flashback is still on my Most Wanted list (Flashback itself, sadly, has already had a disappointing remake). And the best Star Wars game of all time, Knights of the Old Republic, I decided not to include as – again – I think we’re going to see that reimagined and folded into the new official Disney canon in some form. Maybe that should preclude me imagining the original game in 4K with updated character models, dynamic shadows, and ray-tracing, but – hey – that’s just me. At least that is one game that I’ll still be able to play fairly easily on an Xbox Series X, even without whistles and bells. Here’s to dead old games!

#top ten #games #gaming #remasters #old games #retro games #command & conquer #lemmings #star wars #dizzy #warcraft #quake

[mooberg]

Among the Statues

Chapter 4: Polishing Stones

And here’s chapter 4 friends! Not much to say about this one except I’m sorry. Don’t read if you’ve had a bad day but I feel like that’s just standard operation with my stuff now...

Word Count: 4017

No warnings except angst

Enjoy!

The sky was just barely beginning to lighten when they arrived back on campus. Gamma didn't say much. She had learned pretty early on that when Horns got like this, he just needed space. But that was a commodity they couldn’t afford in that moment, so she kept him moving forward, but at his own speed. The sprawling fields that made up the campus grounds came slowly into view as they crested a hill. Between trees and buildings, statues dotted the greenspaces. This was a sight they had become uncomfortably familiar with in such a short span of time. Gone was the hope for some sort of movement, some sort of break from this curse. But replacing it was determination. As they walked in step, Gamma glanced over to him, seeing that same emotion spark in him.

“We have to keep strong.” She murmured. “For them.”

Horns nodded slowly, taking in a deep breath. “For them.”

The dorm's curtains were drawn shut, no light slipping past to give away their position. With the violent confirmation of another unfrozen virus existing somewhere in the Capitol, and likely the one who caused this whole mess, they couldn't risk being found. Gamma had even elected to ditch the motorcycle early and walk into campus, avoiding any attention drawn by the noise. If the two of them were responsible for leading someone back to their team, they’d never forgive themselves.

The team was still awake when they entered, collapsed in the living room defeated and deflated. It was easy to read the worry and frustration on their faces. They had never done anything to quite this scale before, and the toll it took on them was great. Psi stood when he caught sight of Horns, his expression unreadable.

“I know, I know.” Horns sighed, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. “That was stupid and reckless and impulsive, and I shouldn't have run. I just...”

Psi remained neutral as Horns' hands dropped to his sides, the rest of him deflating along with them.

“I've never... I haven't... all those people. Gone. And we were too late- I was too late... I just don't know.”

“I understand.” Psi's softened tone had Horns looking up in surprise. “That is no easy thing for anyone, particularly the lot of you. It is different for us. Gamma, myself, and... the others. We have seen... we know. In your case, I should not forget that. I am thankful you have not experienced these things, until today in any case, and I hope they only change you for the better. Many lives were lost because of this, let us continue forward for them.”

“We have to keep going.” Gamma added. “With all the craziness going on this is far from the last thing we'll be up against.”

“But we don't even know what we're up against.” Equo countered. “Or who.”

“Maybe if Horns has another vision...?” Jolly offered.

Horns nodded. “Could be some more clues, I guess.”

“Then you should all get some rest, if you can.” Psi said. “I can see in your faces how tired you are. You have done good work today. We will strategize where to go from here when you wake.”

For the second time that night, the team split to their respective rooms. Horns shut his door with a sigh, resisting the urge to hit his head against it. He let his emotions get the better of him, and that could have cost them so much more than just some wasted time. This was not going to be an easy situation, and he needed to keep his head on straight or there was no telling what could happen. He turned, heading to his bed, as a calming scent met him. The little spider plant Psi had given him sat on his desk, now inexplicably sprouting lavender. It reminded Horns of the numerous times Psi had aided him in his meditations, including that fateful day he discovered his mind diving powers. The very power that now possibly held the key to ending this curse. He smiled as he turned off the light, thanking his mentor silently as a deep sleep took him.

 ~~~*~~~

 “... which begs the question of why. Why would someone freeze an entire city- or... well we still don't know how far this goes. But why freeze an entire city and just do nothing?”

“But they didn't do nothing.”

“True. But then. Then. If you're going to freeze and then... smash an entire city, why do it little pieces at a time? Why not just steamroll everything? If that is your intention. And then if that's not your intention, why freeze anybody at all? Someone with access to magic this powerful could easily have controlled everyone in a multitude of different ways. Why frozen?”

“Maybe it's Elsa.” Horns suggested, groggily stepping out of his room to Jolly's conspiracy rambles. She, Callow and Glitch were in the living room.

“But if it was Elsa, she wouldn't have frozen everybody, now would she?” Jolly continued, a wild glint in her eye. “And when she realized what she'd done, wouldn't she have tried to reverse it? Or reached out for help? Or made her presence known in some way?”

“Well there aren't any reanimated snowmen wandering around and the skies are clear so I think we can rule that one out.” Callow said, his voice suggesting Jolly had been at this for a while.

“So then if it's not Elsa, who is it?” Jolly asked. “Who would have frozen an entire city- or is it not freezing at all? Is it something else? Is it-”

“Jolly?” Horns softly cut her off and she glanced over at him with wild eyes. “I don't have nearly enough coffee in me for this. Do you think you could cool it on the Unsolved rambles here?”

“Fine, but we'll continue this later.” She pointed at him in a way that somehow managed to be threatening.

He just nodded, heading into the kitchen as his nose registered the smell of coffee. Callow watched him go, popping up on his knees on the couch to ask over the cushions,

“How'd you sleep? Get any spooky-ooky visions?”

“They are premonitions, you dick, and no. Nothing.” Horns replied. “Where're Gamma and Psi?”

“Sleeping.” Glitch said, glancing over at the closed office door. “Cal and I kicked 'em out when we woke up a couple hours ago. Figured we'd let them rest too, they need it just as much as we do.”

Horns just nodded in understanding, pouring way too much sugar for anyone but him into his coffee before returning to the living room. A small alert noise sounded from Callow's tablet where it rested on the coffee table, drawing everyone's attention.

“Ah shit.” Callow dove for the device, swiping it open quickly.

“What does your padlet have to say?” Horns asked.

“It's a tablet, Horns.” Jolly corrected.

“Whatever, technology's weird.” Horns dismissed her.

“Ok Victorian-er.” Glitch smirked.

“Movement detected in Que Village. I synced our surveillance to my tablet so I could monitor on the go. Even after all this is done, I'll be able to see anywhere in the Capitol any time I-” Callow cut himself off, quickly glancing between his teammates. “Uh... Psi definitely does not know about this.”

“Cal-”

“And it's going to stay that way unless a certain someone wants Psi to find out what happened to the cactus Sammy bought us.” Callow said pointedly. Glitch's mouth shut with an audible click.

“Should we wake the others?” Jolly asked. “What's the commotion?”

“I just got coffee...” Horns grumbled quietly.

Callow was silent for a few moments, swiping quickly between things on his screen. Finally, he sighed, “no. It was just some deer.”

“Good. I'm finishing this coffee.” Horns continued to grumble.

“So what you're saying is, we have no new leads.” Glitch huffed, staring dejectedly at the ceiling.

“Yes, but why is this happening anyway?” Jolly asked. “What possible motive-”

“Jolly oh my god.” Callow cut her off.

“Look, I'm just saying.” Jolly held her hands up innocently.

“If it were me, and I had that kind of power, there's definitely a few dozen people I'd want to freeze so I didn't have to worry about them being mean to me, or getting to me, or think about them in any way ever again. I'm not saying I'd smash them, necessarily, but-” Horns cut himself off, glancing up to three surprised expressions as he registered what he was actually saying. “Uh... I mean... y'know, people suck and all and some people wouldn't be missed- uh not that I'd do anything to them or anything, but it's crossed my mind- I'm just going to shut up.”

“Might wanna chug the rest of that coffee, Horny.” Glitch suggested. “You have no filter when you're tired.”

“He makes a fair point though.” Callow said. “For someone to go after everyone in a city, they aren't trying to get back at specific individuals, they're trying to get back at the city itself.”

“We're looking for a deeply angry person.” Jolly agreed. “Someone like that... there's really no telling what they'd do next.”

 ~~~*~~~

 The two of them slept a dreamless sleep, limbs tangled together in a desperate attempt to hang on to something. Anything. Whatever they still had left. Psi grabbed hold of Gamma the minute they found warmth under the comforter of his futon, not letting go even as the two fell asleep. An exhausted kind of rest that came from a day of suppressed raw emotions. Fear, anxiety, loneliness. Their family had been bigger once. They, the 99 that remained, couldn't afford to lose another. But staring into that courtyard and not knowing if that orange was Tripoli or the shop owner three doors down...

And Psi, in his deepest thoughts, can't help but think how much easier it would be with her there. Tripoli, Foxtrot, anyone. And he wakes, tears silently sliding down his cheeks, mingling with Gamma's. He wants his family. He wants Rho. Yoke. Kilogramme. He wants his parents. With his eyes closed, he can almost pretend the arms wrapped around him are Sammy's. At least he knew Sammy was safe. But everyone else...

Gamma's arms tighten around him in her groggy state, thinking for just a moment it's Beta. Waiting for just a moment for the twins to burst in and demand her attention. But she knows. She's already felt the absences across the mind link. She just wants to talk to Juliette again. Hear her comforting voice soothing her worries. She can almost feel the warmth of Quebec wrapping her up in one of those hugs that makes the world melt away. But the world doesn't melt away. She opens her eyes and blinks groggily until the fog of tears clears. Until she can look up and see Psi. Her brother. The only other one left.

Slowly his eyes open too. Slowly, the two of them face the world. Slowly, he pulls her in closer. And the tears don't stop. Not yet. Loss doesn't work like that, even if it's not technically loss. It's as good as.

These are the thoughts that sustain their grief until there's no tears left.

But then Psi remembers Sammy's laugh. Gamma remembers Quebec's proud smile. Psi remembers Sammy's soft voice in the morning. Gamma remembers Beta playing fetch with all their dogs. They remember the mansion, and how it was never truly quiet. They remember Victor humming to himself as something bubbled on the stove. They remember Prep scaring them in the middle of the night when she hung from the ceiling. They remember Liverpool singing to his heart’s content. They remember feeling at home. Finding a family. Feeling safe.

And they get up. They wipe away the tears and square their shoulders. They have a job to do. They have a city to save.

They have a family to save.

 ~~~*~~~

 The rest of the team woke eventually, slowly filing into the now quiet living room. The mood was still low from their nighttime excursion, the memories fresh in their minds. They kept themselves distracted in their own ways, but the waiting was uncomfortable.

“See anything last night?” Equo asked Horns cautiously when she flopped into an armchair, somehow managing not to spill her coffee.

“No, but... now that I’ve had some time to wake up and think about it…” He frowned, letting out a nasally sigh. “I felt weird all night.”

“Weird how?” Gamma leaned over the back of the couch.

“Like... restless.” Horns said. “Like I couldn't relax, I didn't feel safe.”

“I mean... we kind of all feel like that right now.” Glitch replied.

“Yeah... I guess so.”

“What're we supposed to do now?” Jolly asked Psi as he, too, slipped into the living room, sitting on the ottoman under the TV.

Psi and Gamma shared a glance. “With no new leads or inclinations, our best bet would be to patrol the city.”

“The whole city?” Equo exclaimed.

“But,” Gamma cut in, “since most of you are inexperienced in that field, and since Callow's set up surveillance, that doesn't seem necessary.”

“Besides, this person could strike anywhere in Dashland.” Psi added.

“So... we just sit here?” Glitch slumped into the couch.

“That about sums it up.” Gamma confirmed.

“Well I’m going to meditate.” Horns said. “If I dive any of you, I'm so-”

His words were cut off by the sharp alert once again blaring from Callow's tablet.

“What is that?” Psi asked cautiously, familiar with Callow's antics.

“Surveillance.” The gator virus responded quickly, not focusing on his mentor. “Linked the two. Movement detected...”

“Is it deer again?” Glitch asked wryly.

Callow ignored her, swiping furiously at his tablet in a completely different manner from last time. At his silence, the whole team tensed.

“I don't... know.” He said finally. “There's movement but I can't tell what. And it's getting closer.”

“How close?” Gamma asked lowly.

“About... 50 kilometers from here.”

“That's close.” Equo breathed.

“We should go investigate.” Gamma decided, standing straighter to assume a more authoritative image. “Everyone gear up, I want us out in ten or less.”

The team rushed away quickly, gathering any necessary equipment. Horns stopped Callow in the hallway.

“Are there... any densely populated areas near there?” He asked.

“No, it's mostly just forest. Let me see...” Callow buried his nose back in his device and Horns waited with little patience. “Actually, here. It's close to campus. Rotherglen Park, it's got a lot of picnickers.”

“Let me see.” Horns reached for the tablet, thankful when Callow released it easily.

“No, you can't- Horns, hold it by the edges so you don't swipe-”

“I got it, I got it-”

“Just- come on, let me get you back to the right screen-”

“I can do it-”

“No you can't-”

“Yes I can-”

“We've been over this. Just- there.”

Horns shot him a half glare before focusing in on the screen. His pulse peaked violently as he gasped, “I know this place. I know- I've seen it before. Gamma, Psi!”

“What?” Gamma spun around to him, Psi leaned out from behind her, his interest also piqued.

“They're going to hit Rotherglen Park.” Horns said. “I'm sure of it.”

“How sure?” Psi asked.

“I'd bet my life.” He replied, the echo of “you may have to” clear in his mind.

 ~~~*~~~

 Clouds had blown over the sky, heavy with the promise of rain, by the time the team hit the woods. It was hard to tell whether the stillness of the forest was due to an impending storm, or something bigger. Horns had never experienced such quiet among these trees before, and he found himself bracing for impact.

“How much further?” Peony asked over the comms.

“Just over a kilometer. Should start to see the trees thin soon.” Callow replied, tucking his tablet back inside his bag.

“Get low and stay quiet.” Gamma ordered. “We're not going to let whoever's doing this harm anyone else, but we need to get a read on them before spooking them off.”

Horns gave a nervous hum. “Got a bad feeling about this...”

“Let's just hope it's not like last time.” Callow said.

The trees did start to thin a few minutes later, allowing glimpses into the field beyond. Through the branches, they began to make out shapes. Faces. People; still as intact and frozen as the rest. In their own ways, the members of Gamma-Psi reacted in relief.

“Looks like we beat 'em here.” Glitch commented.

“And somehow I don't like that thought.” Equo replied.

“Now we wait.” Psi said. “Fan out and hide.”

The team did as directed, scattering along the northeastern edge of the park. Their footsteps were dulled by the now gently falling rain, and they were all secretly thankful for at least something to cut the silence. Thunder rolled far off in the distance, solidifying the threat of a heavy storm.

“You gotta admit, the ambiance is pretty dope.” Glitch said.

“Quiet, Glitch.” Psi scolded over a smattering of agreements from the team. Gamma just smiled at his ever-suffering sigh.

A resounding crack echoed from the south end of the park, louder than thunder but just as alarming. A maelstrom of swirling wind and debris broke free of the trees, leaving a swatch of broken branches in its wake. One of these trees, a large old oak, broke toward the parkland.

“That family...”

“It's gonna smash them!”

“Psi...”

The 99er acted with barely a twitch, branches from a nearby tree growing rapidly to entwine with the oak. The whole team let out a breath of relief. The small windstorm slowed in the middle of the field, noticing the change in the treeline. There was an area clear of any viruses, and it began to lower itself down into the clearing, shrinking in size as it approached the ground. It burst with a nearly audible pop, dropping the virus who had been inside the last few feet to the ground. And finally, Gamma-Psi could see just who they were up against.

Her dark brown hair fell about her shoulders haphazardly with the dying wind, coming to rest on a black cloak covering a simple red and black dress. Her dark skin was accented by fine features, and dark red veins, which pulsed quickly as she looked around with eyes that could not keep her soul at bay. The deep red wisps floated up to mingle with the falling rain.

“There's no use hiding from me!” She called out, voice strong but soft. “I know you are there.”

“What do we do?” Glitch asked over the comms.

Psi and Gamma shared the briefest of looks before he stood, striding his way out of the treeline.

“There you are.” The woman greeted almost warmly. “I must say you are not what I was expecting.”

“I am sorry to disappoint.” Psi replied, crossing his arms in front of him. “What, perchance, were you expecting?”

She just hummed thoughtfully. “So, do you have a name, tall dark and handsome?”

“Call me Nightshade.” Psi said. “And yourself?”

“You may call me Dragon, my dear.” She offered. “Now are you going to bring out your friends, or shall I?”

“How do you know I am not alone?” He asked.

“I know who resisted my spell.” Dragon leaned forward with a smile just a little too sweet. “And you are definitely not it.”

Psi held her gaze for a moment as he mulled over the decision. Eventually he let out a small sigh, waving the team forward without looking.

Dragon took in the team as they emerged with an exaggerated expression of surprise. “My, my, quite the group you have here.”

“Well, you have raised some concern.” Psi said.

“What do you want?” Jolly asked. “Why are you doing this?”

“My reasons are my own, sweetheart. I just want to know-” She cut herself off as her eyes landed on Horns. He had picked his way through the grass slowly as his stomach roiled with nerves. He looked up and froze as their gazes locked, intrigue washing over her face as she finished, “if you're going to stop me.” He squirmed under her gaze. It felt like she was dissecting him and undressing him at the same time.

“You're hurting innocent people.” He spoke up, trying to steel himself. “We can't let that stand.”

“Oh, my dear.” She jeered. “No one in this world is ever truly innocent.”

Psi cleared his throat and Dragon looked back to him. “Regardless, we wish to see this taking of lives come to an end. What can we do?”

“What can you do?” Dragon echoed mockingly. “You can stay out of my way.”

Psi barely had time to react as she slammed her foot into the ground, spikes of ice erupting forward to barrel into his chest. He managed to lessen the blow with vines sprouting from his arms but hit the ground hard as Dragon swiveled to face the others. Gamma shot up into the air, ready to strike as the team on the ground moved to retaliate. They all went to strike, falling back on the meticulous training of their mentors. She had quick reflexes, however, managing to rebuke them with a gust of wind, or a flash of ice.

The team froze at the familiar sound of Gamma’s laser canons firing off, waiting for the shots to land. Dragon threw up a wall of ice just in time, blocking her attack. When Gamma paused, Dragon threw the ice her way, freezing her wings solid. Psi and his venus fly traps rushed to catch her, the rest of the team momentarily distracted. That was all the time Dragon needed. Horns' attention had not wavered from her, but her intensity scared him, so he'd kept his distance. He watched with absolute dread as wind began to swirl around her, giving her a moment of protection as she murmured something too soft for anyone to hear. And he knew. Somehow, he just knew.

“No, don't-!”

There was a flash of bright blue-white energy, the wind bursting around her once again with an audible pop. The field once again lay still, seven new statues added to the garden. Horns had shied away from the blast, curling in on himself for protection from the debris caught up in the wind. He stood, taking in the sight of his team back in the terrifying state he'd found them just a day before.

“What did you do- what did you do to them?” Horns shouted. “Stop, let them go!”

“Hush now, my little psychic.” Dragon cooed at him. “It's just you and me.”

“What do you want?” Horns asked, stepping back guardedly.

She matched his step, not letting him gain any distance. “Oh, nothing yet. Soon, but not yet. I still have more to do before I can deal with you.”

“What are you planning?” He gripped his dagger tighter.

She brushed his question off, instead humming in amusement as she began to circle him. “How powerful you must be, little psychic, to resist my spell. Twice now, in fact. Not powerful yet, no, but the talent is there. Hidden. Oh, how I would love to shape that mind of yours. I could teach you so much. More than these people ever could. That potential is just waiting to be unleashed.”

“How would you know?” He scoffed. “You don't know anything about me.”

“Oh, I know more than you think.” She whispered smoothly.

“How?”

“You'll find out.” She said. “In due time.”

“Why in due time?” He asked. “You've got me here, without my team. Why don't you just finish it?”

She circled back around in front of him and he glared in her direction. “Because I am curious to see what you make of what's to come.”

With a twist of wind, she was gone, her figure disappearing with the falling sand that had been kicked up. Letting out a panicked breath, Horns turned to his team; frozen again. He was alone.

Again.

#lvc #larka's virus community #moo writes #i'm so sorry #also i've been sitting on this villain reveal for like 4 years omg #i'm a big fan #even though i kept having to stop myself from spelling her name dargon #also that chapter title took way too long #let me know what you guys thought #my fight scenes need work #among the statues

[dzamie-oc]

6: Hidden

“...so by adjusting the variable theta here in the matrix, you can alter the angle of rotation.”

Ocellus kept her eyes on her note paper, making clean, orderly brackets to house the grids of numbers and trigonometric functions. She flicked her forked tongue, getting a cursory taste of the emotions in the room. The delicious, cool flavor of learning and understanding, soured slightly by a smattering of confusion. A couple spicy motes of frustration, largest from where Smolder sat. The changeling glanced towards the dragon, finding that her friend’s own eyes were darting between the chalkboard, Headmare Starlight, and... her. Pulling herself back from the draw of nibbling on the emotions, Ocellus startled when she realized she had missed two entire equations being written. That they were just the first steps in a practice problem was small comfort to the blue-chitin changeling; who knew what verbal instructions she could have missed, too?

After catching back up in her notes, she chanced another taste, intending to take more of a passive taste, paying more attention to class. However, what she intended was overruled harder Princess Celestia denying Prince Blueblood the last bite of her cake; an intoxicating wave of lust filled her tastebuds, overpowering nearly every other emotion in the room. Reflexively, Ocellus turned towards its source, both surprised and suddenly hungry - although she hated to admit it. Not only was it filling yet almost nutritionally useless, the taste and her reaction recalled memories in her from before the Great Reformation, when she had been drawn towards and fed on such strong love-adjacent emotions.

Nonetheless, she found herself staring at her dragon friend, who was now staring entirely at her. A light blush crept onto her cheeks as she considered the implications: her unsubtle, willful dragon friend was focused wholly on her, and thinking incredibly lewd thoughts at her. Her thoughts were once more diverted when the lust suddenly cut off, replaced by a more platonic desire. In the back of her mind, she acknowledged that Headmare Starlight was going over the answer to the problem on the board, almost unconsciously copying down the correct answer for later comparison; at present, though, she noticed Smolder repeatedly moving her hand. Thumb and fingers together, save for an extended pinky, rocking back towards the dragoness twice. Pause, hand still in position, and another two rocks. It was a sign the two of them had worked out - miming the high-society griffon etiquette for holding a teacup.

Ocellus smiled and nodded ever so slightly, then waited until Smolder smiled back, put her hand down, and turned back to the front of the class before doing the same herself. She mentally kicked herself for dropping her attention from class, but reassured herself that friends were important, as well. After all, the School of Friendship has “friendship” right in its name... as well as school, so she resolved to stay focused on the lesson until after class. Her pencil once more found the paper when the headmare moved onto three-dimensional transformation matrices, and her tail subconsciously began to sway back and forth as she drank in the learning - almost literally, as an emotivore!

After class, Ocellus met up with the dragon, who was leaning against the wall outside of the classroom. “Was that... necessary?” she asked, her blush returning with the memory of the wave of lust, “I mean, you could have asked me after class; I tend to linger the longest to speak with our professors.”

Smolder smirked. “No, but I wanted to make sure you wouldn’t stay for an hour or two after Starlight Glimmer dismissed us and take up all the time we could’ve used. Seeing your reaction was just a bonus. So, same place as before?”

Ocellus nodded, starting to walk with her friend. “That works. I’ll drop off my stuff back in our room first, and then we can head out.”

“Sounds good. I’ll tag along; I’ve gotta grab a-” the dragoness cut herself off, looking around at the ponies and creatures around, “a... a thing. My thing.”

Back in their room, the two students swapped out their schoolbooks for a small selection of carefully-folded dresses. Ocellus levitated a tube of lipstick into Smolder’s bag for her, and added a bottle of hoof polish and a compact of blush to her own. Loaded up with their secret payload of fancy fittings, the two girls strode out of their room, sharing fanged smiles.

They made it to the main hall before somecreature noticed and approached them. Silverstream, with her distinctly bubbly step, strode up to the pair. Ocellus flicked out her tongue and got back a hefty dose of curiosity from the hippogriff, fighting against that spicy taste of frustration (and the faintest hint of shame) from the dragon beside her.

“Hi Celly, Smolder! Are you two heading out?”

The changeling nodded. “Yep. Just the two of us.”

“Ooh, girl’s night! Or, girl’s afternoon. Whatcha gonna do?” Her bright, innocent smile was infectious, and Ocellus found her own lips curling up. She stayed silent, however, unwilling to tell her friend where she was going with the dragon.

Fortunately for her, Smolder had had years of hiding her secret interest. Unfortunately for her, Smolder was Smolder. “We’re going to set a new record for longest two-creature lesbian makeout session. Do you want to come?”

The sarcasm flew straight over the hippogriff’s head, and her enthusiastic nodding only abated when Smolder’s deadpan expression and admission that she had just been messing with her sunk in. With a promise to have a good time given, the pair strode out of the building, before making their way through the meandering, misleading path to a secret spot in the woods.

Ocellus and Smolder walked up to the large, flat stump in the middle of the forest clearing and set about setting up. From Smolder’s pack came a white tablecloth, fringed with lace. From Ocellus’s, a teapot, two saucers, and two teacups. The makeup came out next, and finally, the dresses. Smolder slipped hers on with an ease that came from far more practice than she would ever admit. As for the changeling...

“So, myself or Professor Rarity? She has the accent and mannerisms for it.” Ocellus held two dresses aloft in her teal magic, looking between them.

“Hmm... Probably not Rarity, but...” Smolder’s off-center stance and stroking of her chin were a stark contrast to the frilly, pale pink dress she wore as she thought, “I think, maybe... Oh! Could you do Gallus? I bet he’d look ADORABLE in a dress!”

That drew a grin and a giggle from the changeling. A wave of fire washed over her form, and in the next moment, a pair of yellow eagle claws caught the two floating dresses before they could hit the ground. ‘Gallus’ handed one to Smolder to fold and return to Ocellus’s bag, and the griffon set about fitting into the other one. After a little difficulty, getting stuck twice, and ultimately asking Smolder for help with the wings, ‘Gallus’ was proudly sporting a pale yellow dress. “Well? How do I look?” ‘he’ asked the dragoness.

“Heh. Actually, not bad. The next time we play Truth or Dare with the boys, I think I’ve got a good idea.” Smolder leaned to one side, then the other, taking in the griffon’s form. “But, I think you’re missing something very important.”

The grinning dragon held up a couple of the makeup implements before setting them down. The pair of friends spent some time matching blush to their scales and feathers, picking out the right lipstick - or beakstick, as it were - painting each other’s claws, and otherwise gussying themselves and each other up until they both looked like slightly exaggerated versions of the fanciest fancy bourgeoisie to be found in Canterlot - nay, all of Equestria.

Smolder cleared her throat. “Now then, Madam Gallus, shall we?” she prompted in a Received Equestrian accent, “it would be a terrible shame to come all the way here for some tea, and to then forget the beverage in entirety!”

‘Gallus’ gave a proper curtsey, then stepped up to the stump. ‘He’ picked up the teapot in one hand, held the lid on with the other, and gracefully tipped it over, pouring a cup for Smolder, and then a cup for ‘himself.’ With two steaming cups of tea properly set on their saucers, the well-dressed duo took their seats. ‘Gallus’ added two sugar cubes to the cup in front of ‘him;’ Smolder added only one. Keeping their pinky claws extended, they lifted their cups and politely toasted their friendship. 

Hidden away in the calm, peaceful grove, the disguised changeling and her dragon friend traded light gossip, homework tips, and compliments. Their table manners would put several Canterlot nobles to shame, and over time, the level of tea in the teapot declined. The pair were in the middle of discussing which creature in their friends group had the shapeliest rear when Sandbar wandered into the clearing and promptly did a double-take.

The three of them stared at each other for a minute, before ‘Gallus’ finally spoke up, “we... lost a bet to Ocellus. Why she has these dresses, I haven’t the foggiest, but she’s, uh...” the griffon turned his head to look around, “well, she’s one of these branches around, to make sure we keep the deal.”

Smolder’s look of shock faded as her friend spun the tale. “Yeah, but look. This whole thing? Never happened. You’re gonna leave, and next time we see each other, it’s like we weren’t even here, even if you ask. Right, Gallus?”

‘Gallus’ nodded. “Yeah, you’re actually lucky I’m not denying this right now. Anyway, we’ve got, like, another teacup to finish before this is over. See you back at school.”

Content with their answer, the pony silently nodded and walked back off through the forest. Once they were sure he was out of sight and hearing, both of the well-dressed creatures let out a big sigh of relief. Their secret was safe. And they still had some tea left to talk over.

#dragons #My Little Pony #ocellus #smolder #smolcellus #changelings #fanfiction #text #smaugust in november

[impulse-writing]

prompt: a dragon nesting

“Yang, love of my life, woman of my dreams.” Blake watched a roof shingle fall and shatter on the patio, cracked pieces of slate scattering on polished wood. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I’m fixing the roof, babe.”

“... Why?”

She winced at the sound of wood splintering in a thousand pieces, which was loud enough that her faunus ears pressed against her head, trying to block out the ruckus. There was another bang. Something heavy fell (“…shit.”). And it sounded like Yang ripped something from the foundations of their house, while the roof shuddered from something heavy being dragged across.

Despite dreading her wife’s antics, Blake was too tired and cranky to climb up the roof and investigate it herself.

“I noticed one of the shingles were cracked.”

“Why does it sound like you’re replacing our entire roof?”

Sweet silence graced her ears. Blake crossed her arms over the swell of her stomach, knowing perfectly well her imposing figure was less effective thanks to the glow and healthy roundness of her face. Nonetheless, she felt pleased to see Yang’s golden head come into view not a second too soon.

She winced at the sight of Blake’s glare, visible even from two stories below. Her yellow eyes narrowed into slits, ears pushed back, and hackles raised. “Yang Xiao Long.” Her words dripped with false composure. “Get down here right now.”

Yang’s head disappeared from view in a flurry of hair. A minute later, she appeared again, standing at the edge of the roof carrying a toolbox, a shovel, and what seemed to be a shoddily constructed birdhouse tucked under one arm. Blake had no idea where the birdhouse came from. The birdhouse did not exist yesterday, and it eerily looked like something made from their broken backdoor -- which Yang promised she would fix a week ago. And just like their old door, the wood was tainted green. And the doorknob was still attached.

Blake did not want to know why her wife took it to the roof with her. So she bit her tongue and waited, patient as Yang jumped down and landed in front of her, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

“What’s up?”

“Yang--”

“Hold that thought.” She rushed over to the wheelbarrow by their shed, throwing the shovel and toolbox next to it. She tucked the ‘birdhouse’ under one arm after a moment of struggling, and began to dig through the mess of rusty garden tools half-buried under fertilizer, dead leaves, and recently cut grass. “Babe, have you seen the garden hose somewhere?”

Blake pressed her thumb and forefinger against her throbbing brow.

“No, Yang. Why do you need a garden hose?”

“Makin’ a frog pond.”

Blake heaved the world’s longest sigh. Deep breaths, Blake.

“Honey, maybe you should take a break from all your projects? We can get someone else to fix the roof.” Or what’s left of it. “And we can hire a professional... frog pond person.”

“Nope, no can do.” Yang said, effectively dashing Blake’s hopes for a wonderful morning of peace and cuddling with her fertilizer-smelling, grass-stained wife. “Remember those stories I told you about when Ruby and I were kids? We used to play around the lake near our house, and we had fun catching tadpoles, setting cattails on fire, and -- okay maybe I caught hypothermia that one time, but it was mostly sweet kid stuff!” Yang finally kept herself from vibrating in place to turn around and give Blake a better view of the smile on her infuriatingly pretty and adorable face. “This will be awesome. Trust me.”

“That’s great.” Blake said, thinking about how not-great this was. “But maybe you can work on the frog pond next time and come back inside? You’ve been doing these things non-stop for weeks now, Yang. I miss you. I’m sexually frustrated, and I have no idea what’s happening to our house anymore.”

“I gotta get everything ready before the babies get here.” Yang said, waving a giant pair of garden shears in the air. “It’s my job to make sure everything’s perfect when they arrive. Besides, the pond’s gonna tie the swing and treehouse together. Just wait and see, Blake, it’s gonna be gorgeous.”

Treehouse?

Before Blake could ask her to repeat and kindly specify what the hell she was talking about, Yang ran off again, grabbing the shovel by her feet. She made a beeline for the beautiful great oak in their garden, and Blake didn’t have the strength or will to stop her. Instead, she watched as Yang jumped onto one of the branches, and proceeded to shimmy up the tree; disappearing behind the thick foliage with the shovel sticking awkwardly amongst the swaying branches and leaves.

This was how Weiss received a frantic call from Blake that morning.

“Weiss, I need you here right now.”

She could hear horrible noises from the other side of her scroll. Blake’s voice loud enough for Weiss to hear, and it was apparent how rough and tired she sounded; an edge of desperation begging to be released behind the calm veneer she barely managed.

“Blake?”

“I think my wife is possessed and I don’t know what to do.”

“Whoa, wait. Slow down... Ren, are you still there? Yes. Can I call you back? … Yes ...Of course, yes. I will speak to you later. Good-bye.”

“Weiss?”

“Belladonna, this better be good. Ren was telling me about the dreaded syllabus for the next semester.”

“I need you and your sanity to come here right now. Where are you?”

“I’m visiting professor Port --”

“That’s just an hour long drive from here, right?”

“Yes, Blake. Just an hour-long drive.”

“Please come over?”

Weiss cursed her inability to express sarcasm without sounding too much like Weiss Schnee.

“... Fine.”

“Thanks, Weiss. Oh, and can you bring me a bag of shrimp crackers? Thanks.”

Weiss left Professor Port’s house in a rush, trying to estimate what time she might arrive on the couple’s doorstep. She wondered if she could cut an hour to a half by speeding over a hundred, but decided against it. Instead, Weiss spent her hour long drive to Blake and Yang’s house thinking.

Thinking, Weiss thought, was good  ‘Thinking’ was also something Weiss was particularly good at doing. Having an unpredictable force of nature as a partner for more than a decade, in both profession and matrimonially, demanded her mind to work like a detached, mechanical processor most of the time. Like a dot matrix printer arranging a billion dots until they created a picture anyone could comprehend. Some people called it a gift, but Weiss proceeded to call it ‘necessary for her mental health’.

“She’s the team’s Weiss of reason.” Yang once said, three seconds before everyone pelted her with peanuts and tiny cocktail umbrellas.

Chamomile for Blake, and black coffee for Weiss. One of their many comforts were small reminders of things that never changed.

Blake had her face in her hands, fingers pressed against her temples as if she could ward off the source of her predicament by the willpower of touch alone. The pair were alone in the humbly decorated kitchen, a few plates piled up in the sink, the smell of breakfast escaping from the open windows. Toast, eggs, dried fish, sweet tomatoes. There were sunflower-themed drapes, the drawers, tables and chairs were painted yellow, and the fridge had pictures of the couple in happier times. The colorful fridge magnets below spelt: ‘help me’.

Weiss concentrated on the hot water kettle.

“This is beyond asking for fritos in the middle of the night, Weiss. Or carrying around dirty laundry in my pockets.” Blake said, her voice muffled. “I swear, it’s not my hormones or mood swings acting up. Yang is driving me crazy, and you’ll know why when you see what she’s been doing to the place.”

“Well the house looks like it’s still standing.”

Weiss watched Blake ruefully reach for a shrimp cracker.

“Although I do admit, you look like someone just died.” Weiss said, leaning her hip against the table top counter.

“Thanks.”

“So let’s take a breather and think about this.” Weiss crossed her arms. “What else has she been doing? ”

“Other than dumb DIY projects?” Blake exhaled. “I found her ‘baby-proofing’ the living room with pool noodles a week ago.”

“Ah. I was wondering why Yang had boxes of those in your garage.”

“She almost booked an expensive birthing room from a hippy compound in Vacuo--”

“There’s a hippy compound in Vacuo?”

“... which cost a thousand lien.”

“Why is it a thousand lien?” Weiss scoffed, rubbing her forehead. “That’s a ridiculous price. I mean what do they do, birth your child in a diamond encrusted pool?”

“Weiss, do I look like I bothered to find out?”

“Point.”

Blake relaxed into the chair, as much as she could, her hand resting on the curve of her belly. “We have coupons for cup ramen and free dumplings everywhere, several different colors of paint because Yang can’t decide ‘which shade is the best for the baby room’.” Weiss tried not to laugh when Blake managed an exaggerated imitation of an annoyed Yang.

“That doesn’t sound too bad, all things considered.”

“Yang has dismantled and put together our doors, windows, and chairs multiple times because it didn’t look safe enough or it looked ‘wonky’. Our unborn children own several pairs of shoes and sunglasses than both of us combined, and she bought a jackhammer and a woodworking chisel set the other day.” Blake caught her eyes, her face drawn with palpable fear. “I have no idea where Yang put them, or why she bought them in the first place.”

“I see.”

“I have a strong feeling, Weiss. A strong, very bad feeling.”

“I’ll make sure Ruby finds them so you can return them to the store.”

“And she fixed ‘the pipes’.” Blake threw her hands into the air. “I have no idea which ‘pipes’ she was talking about, but I found her tinkering around underneath the space of our house with a rope and a screwdriver. I dunno Weiss, I just don’t know.” She inhaled a shaky breath, raking her fingers through frazzled hair. “It’s actually happening. I am losing my mind. I never thought this day would come.”

“Okay, first of all: sweetheart, this is Yang we’re talking about, right?” Weiss clicked her tongue. She turned her attention to opening one of the kitchen cupboards, and reached in for a clean teacup. “You know her, she’ll tire herself out soon enough after doing a half-ass job of everything. I’ll help hire a carpenter to fix whatever she breaks, and I can even throw in a treehouse if you want. Easy solution, and nothing to be overdramatic about.”

“Am I, Weiss?” Blake’s ear twitched. “Am I overreacting?”

Weiss was glad Blake couldn’t see the smirk on her face. She liked to tease, but she knew Blake would snap with her pregnant lady fury if she pushed too far. If she sensed even a shred of mirth from her, Blake might do something drastic, like force Yang to live in her house during the remaining four months of her pregnancy. Weiss loved her sisters-in-law, but she also loved her modest house too much to invite a literal walking cyclone of repressed mommy issues near her furniture. She already had a walking disaster with a penchant for sharp things living with her in it, and that number was her limit.

“Weiss, you are totally not helping.” Blake said.

“I’m sorry! But maybe it’s better to stop worrying, maybe sleep-in, visit that new bookstore in Vale before your paperwork drags you back behind your desk. Let Yang do her Yang things, and assume everything will be back to normal by the time my nieces are–”

It took Weiss a full minute before she realized she was holding a rock.

She raised the rock up at eye level, confirming to herself that yes – it was a rock. A real-life rock. She sent Blake a look.

“Yang started hoarding them a few days ago.”

“Hoarding rocks?”

Blake bounced her shoulders with a tired shrug.

Weiss carefully placed the rock on the counter, looking as if it would transfigure into a teacup the instant she takes her eyes off it. She pulled the cupboard doors wide open, and gasped at what seemed to be a rock collection hidden amongst the fancy tea cups and glass mugs. All of them piled on top of each other, all in different shapes and various sizes, with the largest as big as her head.

“What is this?”

“Is that a rhetorical question, or are you still having trouble taking me seriously?”

Weiss poked her nose inside the cupboard to take a closer look. There were rocks inside the teacups. There were rocks inside the mugs.

She looked at Blake and pointed at the extensive rock collection, an eyebrow raised, and Weiss could almost hear her say ‘told ya so’ with her derisive look.

As if needing further confirmation of Yang’s recent habits, she continued to open one of the utensil drawers and gasped in scandalous horror when she discovered bottle caps, smaller pebbles, and tiny cereal box toys filling the tiny space from corner to corner. Other than the geological refuse mingling with the sporks were fancy hair clips buried underneath with the butter knives.

In the cupboard under the sink were coins in tupperwares, a random assortment of fancy beads, and buttons filling a lone boot in the dark corner.

For the life of her, Weiss couldn’t keep the mirth from her voice.

“I can’t believe Yang Xiao Long is nesting.”

#bumbleby #so my friend challenged me with this prompt #future-fic #domestic bees #my fic stuff #i really gotta probably change my blog icon... #bees being future parents #pregnancy #and pregnancy shenanigans

[nish-s-random-writing]

Growing Up (4/?)

Chapter 4! USUK Cardverse AU!

(a/n): This just in: 3000+ words of fluff and some angst. I’m going for a one-update-a-week schedule, so let’s see if I can keep it up. ;) Enjoy!

ff.net || <<ch 3   ch5>>

Chapter 4

“The archers,” Arthur breathes.

The way he stares and holds his breath as he looks up at the skilled bowmen is evidence of how wondrous they seemed to the young queen in that moment. “I want to be like the archers,” he said again, and slowly took another breath.

Elizabeta, the captain of the guard, smiled at him endearingly while the young king beamed like the endless light of the sun.

“That’s so cool! I can totally see you being an archer, Arthur. You’re so tall and your arms are so long you could handle that bow like nobody’s business.” When Alfred raised his arms in one of his enthusiastic gestures, Arthur was tugged along and a flush came to his face—perhaps at the complement, or the realization that his hand was still being held securely in the younger boy’s own throughout the whole walk to the center of the training ground where they now stood.

The soldiers moving about them gave them a sizable berth, but the curious looks they chanced over their shoulders was not lost on Arthur, making the boy a little more squeamish than he’d like to be. But when he watched the archers, so intently focused on their targets, their entire bodies poised so pristinely and calmly, yet filled with the strength and power of a drawn bow, Arthur couldn’t look away. He’d like to feel that sort of power, that sort of poise and calmness. Wielding a bow seemed like mastery and control, and Arthur found that immensely appealing.

He turned to Elizabeta in a rush. “When can I start?”

The tall woman laughed and set a hand on Arthur’s shoulder. “In time, dear boy. We’d have to have a smaller bow crafter for you if you’d like to start in the next month, for I doubt you’d be able to carry a bow larger than your own body.”

“Arthur can do it!” Alfred piped up. “He’s super strong, you see. He threw an apple once and it hit me in the head from all across the lawn in the orphanage! I think he was aiming for the basket next to me though, but he can work on his aim!”

“I was aiming for your head,” said Arthur.

“Oh. But see? He’d already make a great archer!”

Elizabeta laughed and Arthur shook his head. “What are you going to do, Alfred?” asked the older boy.

Alfred’s eyes sparkled, then he turned to the side and pointed to the greater mass of soldiers who were sparring with gleaming blades of steel, sweating in the sun and letting out great laughs and yells.

“I want to fight with a sword!” The cheery boy exclaimed.

“Hmm, messy and impulsive. Just like you, Alfred.”

Alfred snorted, but his disbelieving look disappeared when he saw the small smile Arthur sported. He spoke just like he would back in the orphanage. Biting and a bit mean—but hey, that meant he was getting back into himself!

Alfred smiled wider.

He began to talk about how he would fight with a sword as they followed Elizabeta through the field. He talked about how he’d lead the ranks into war one day and obliterate the enemy with his sheer skill. He alone would crumble the enemy’s palace with his strength and his sword. All the while, Arthur rolled his eyes and made biting remarks of how unrealistic and stupid he sounded. But the longer the insults Arthur shot, the happier Alfred seemed to get.

“And you know, because I’m going to grow up to be the superest, strongest hero, I’m going to be your protector!”

“Firstly, superest isn’t a word. And second, that’s already in your job description as king.” Arthur huffed, but Alfred just grinned cheekily.

“Yeah, well even if it wasn’t I’ll still make it my sworn duty to protect you at all costs!”

Arthur looked surprised. He didn’t say anything, but made a half-hearted attempt to roll his eyes. Alfred didn’t know what that look meant, but he knew that he meant every word of what he’d said. Well, alright, he wasn’t exactly sure he could break down concrete walls with his sword, but he was definitely going to be the strongest hero so he could be Arthur’s hero. From now on, it was his actual sworn duty to protect Arthur, and he’d stay true to that.

------------------- - - -

After their walk with Elizabeta, the very worn-looking Yao took them back into the palace to explore the inner walls. Alfred had spotted him being spoken to by what seemed to be a palace official when they were returning from the field. The expressions on their faces were anything but cheery and prideful. Almost… fearful, actually.

“You don’t think something’s wrong, do you?” Arthur had asked. Alfred shrugged in response and shared a worried look with the older boy.

As they walked the well-lit and decorated halls of the castle, Arthur quietly asked Yao what that talk was about, if it was something dangerous.

The Jack only laughed and shook his head. “Nothing serious, my boy. A few financial worries—stock market and employment rate—all that boring math stuff you kids shouldn’t worry about. We’ll be fine.”

“I like math!” Alfred said. “Can I help?”

The Jack laughed again, a little less forced, a little less strained. “This is grown-up math, Alfred. Even I kind of don’t get it. Hey, let’s quit talking about boring math and get to looking around, yeah?”

“Yeah!” Alfred cheered. Arthur remained quiet.

They walked through the palace seeing it in better light than before. They explored room after room filled with paintings and rich-looking junk. Old furniture glazed with gold, tapestries depicting battles and past monarchy. Some rooms were bed rooms, some were sitting rooms, some were locked and Yao refused Alfred’s pleas to find their keys.

Yao spun the stories of the great battles depicted in the large paintings that hung along the hall. There were battles for land, for power, for the right to rule their own people. In the old days, the Four Kingdoms fought for dominion of the land, the borders constantly shifting, growing, and shrinking. And then two great wars broke out, one after the other. The Red Kingdom of Hearts was blamed for multiple atrocities, but with their allies turning against them, and with Spades leading the offensive, the country fell into defeat and tremendous debt.

When that debt was repaid and the country forgiven, nearly a hundred years passed, peace ruled over the land for a hundred years more.

“Do you think another war will break out soon?” Arthur asked. When Yao didn’t respond immediately, he went on. “Do you think… we’ll have to lead the fight?”

“Heavens no!” The Jack jumped. “Of course you’re too young to be involved in a war, much less lead it. O-of course, there is no war, Arthur. There will be no war. We live in peace now. We have secure trade and diplomacy arrangements with the other kingdoms, and if a fifth one shall sprout up and threaten us then the other three colors are our allies.” Yao smiled reassuringly but shaky, and Arthur lowered his eyes.

“I-I’m sorry. You’ve probably been very stressed lately. I didn’t mean to burden you with… stupid questions.” Arthur grew quieter as he spoke, and all but mumbled the last couple of words.

Yao’s eyes softened and he placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “No, Arthur, it’s alright. Your questions are not stupid. I did say I’d answer any question you’ve got as long as I have an answer.”

Arthur nodded, but he was quiet for the short rest of the walk. Alfred’s jokes and attempts to coax him back into his biting demeanor did nothing to change the way Arthur lowered his head and kept as still as possible.

Eventually the royal trio wound up at the large pair of doors that lead into the vast library. Yao paused there, then yawned loudly.

“It seems to be an hour before lunchtime,” He remarked, flipping open a pocket watch he drew from his suit. “Please, explore the palace at your own leisure. I’m going to have a nap and I’ll see you both at lunchtime, if that’s alright with you?”

“Of course,” said Arthur.

“Yeah!” Said Alfred.

With a polite farewell, Yao walked back down the hall and disappeared behind the corner.

Alfred turned to his companion and beamed up at him. “Wanna go exploring?” He giggled.

Arthur rolled his eyes for the nth time that day and turned to push open the heavy oaken doors. “No. I am going to be in here, if Yao asks for me. There’s been a good bunch of novels I’ve been wanting to read so you can go bugger off somewhere else.”

Instead of buggering off like Arthur had quite roughly insisted, Alfred followed Arthur inside the library. He whistled lowly at the vast walls of books and polished marble tables. Sunlight flooded the room from floor-to-ceiling windows that lined one wall, illuminating the tremendously large hall in all its glory.

Arthur briskly ran to one of the closer shelves and selected three books that looked like concrete blocks to Alfred. He probably would’ve used them as weapons instead of reading material.

When Arthur plopped down at one of the tables and opened a book, Alfred attempted to peer into what he was reading but quickly found the giant block of tiny text to be terribly uninteresting and hopped away.

“Hey, hey, Arthur.” He nudged at the older boy, repeatedly trying to get his attention. But when Arthur growled out a low threat to leave him be, and perhaps made a gesture of throwing the boulder of writing at Alfred, he huffily left the room in search of something more interesting to enjoy. He really would rather have Arthur with him, but if he sat there to keep the older boy company, he knew he’d grow so bored he would begin to annoy him again, which might lose him the friendship points he’d gained from their earlier ventures.

Besides, Arthur really did feel like he wanted to be left alone.

So he walked the halls and looked back at the tapestries, deciding that he’d want to get more and more lost. He climbed carpeted stairs and walked deeper into the palace until he saw no windows and the passages were lit with candlelight.

He saw paintings of people he didn’t recognize, and peered into keyholes of locked rooms only to find silhouettes of dusty furniture.

Eventually, the boy began seeing windows again, that looked out into the greener part of the grounds that Alfred didn’t recognize. He must have ventured around the very far back of the palace by now.

The windows began to become covered with lush green ivy, as well as the vines that grew the tiny, blue spadian flowers. Eventually, Alfred was led to a meek wooden door, and out he went into the sunlight.

He seemed to have been led into a garden of sorts. The grass was trimmed here, and all around were neatly cut hedges, stone pillars where more of the spadian vines grew, marble benches, and blue stone pathways. The area was quite large, but bordered by a familiar stone wall on all sides. To the far right, behind all the greenery, Alfred could see a closed iron gate that seemed to lead out into the rest of the gardens.

Then, Alfred heard the snipping.

Up ahead, the columns supported a stone roof where all over grew vines and ivy and all sorts of flowers that created a roof of greenery. Alfred walked beneath the leaves, and there he found an old man wearing a worn old shirt and raggedy old trousers, leaning on his haunches with a pair of large shears, sniping away at stray weeds on the ground. He noticed that the areas that would normally be filled with an array of plant life was bare, only the green grass to cover them up, and they looked quite recently covered up too. The grass was sparse and the earth wasn’t even. Alfred didn’t know much about gardens but he was certain gardens were to supposed to have flowers. To him, it simply felt like something was missing. Everything was simply too bare.

Alfred turned to the man working on the weeds and saw that he’d now stopped. He was staring back up at him, with eyes wide and mouth agape.

“Wh-who are you?” The man said in a shaky, bewildered voice. Then, suddenly, his brows furrowed and with great difficulty, he rose up with hands on his knees, shaking the shears threateningly. “Are you a little thief, eh? Are you one of em’ hoodlums that keep breaking into my shed an’ stealing me shovels? Well I’ll have you know that I can get you arrested! I’ll be calling on ‘em guards!”

“No, wait!” Alfred exclaimed. He stepped back and raised his hands in surprise and a little fear. “My name is Alfred!”

“I don’t care what your name is, ya little—” The man’s garbled voice stuttered to a halt when his eyes fell upon Alfred’s raised palm.

After a long moment of intense staring, the man turned his crusty eyes to meet a pair of fearful bright blue ones. “Yo… you’re the king,” he mumbled in disbelief, definitely in shock at the tattoo that sprawled all over the young boy’s arm. Then, with a great start, exclaimed, “You’re the king!”

He dropped his shears and hobbled to his knees, bowing his head as low as it would go, shaking in slight fear. “For-forgive me, yer majesty. I was-was as an ignorant fool, is all. Please seek fit to punish me in any way you see, but please spare me my job, this is all I have.”

He was shaky and sounded close to sobbing. The small bit of pride Alfred felt at being recognized as king was quickly replaced by a sort of panicked horror at making a poor old man become so fearful as to beg at his knees.

Feeling like his heart was being wrenched out of his chest, Alfred let out a hurried yelp. “No, please! Don’t do that! I won’t hurt you, I promise. I’m not a mean king—I wasn’t going to steal anything. I just wanted to become friends. Please stop bowing, um, old man.”

Cautiously, the old man lifted his head and straightened his back—well, as straight as it would go given the hunch he seemed to have. He stared at Alfred with a hint of fearful reservation and nodded.

“What does me king ask of me?” He said carefully, blinking every now and then at the blue tattoo as if waking from a dream.

“Hey, call me Alfred,” the boy said, trying for a smile. He put out his hand for a shake, and the old man stared, once more fearful, at the vines that grew all over it. Seeing this, Alfred began to talk. “I know you think because I’m the king and all that I’ll be like one of the snooty, snobby rich kids that parade around the streets in their carriages sometimes, but I promise I’m really nice! I just want to make friends. I don’t really wanna order anyone around ‘cause that feels really weird. Just, don’t be afraid of me, okay? I don’t think I have the power to take away your job anyway.”

With look of even more disbelief, the old man let out a shaky laugh. “Ha! Well, thy majesty has the power to take away any one of ours jobs. And a king like yourself would likely be demandin’ some respect.”

“That would be rude,” said Alfred. “And I don’t want to do that. And hey, if someone’s not slapping me in the face I think that’s respect enough. So will you shake my hand so I can know if we’re friends yet?”

The old man let out another hearty giggle, and with a half-toothless smile shook the small boy’s hand. “Friends, eh? No king’s ever wanted to be friends with no common folk. I been serving three kings in my whole lifetime including you, and neither of the two’s been very kind to folks like us. The nicest they get is when they ain’t speaking to us.” He let out another laugh. “You best keep that attitude as yer growin’ up, eh boy? The kingdom needs it. I certainly hope you don’t get all spoiled by the fancy riches that they give ya in there.” He nodded up towards the palace, and Alfred turned to look.

He looked back at the old man with a smile full of pride, and declared, “No, I won’t turn all stupid. That’s a promise! Only stupid people would take away someone else’s job just for being yelled at.”

The old man laughed again, but this time he was cut off by a bout of loud, watery coughing.

“Are you okay?” Alfred asked as soon as the fit was over. The old man got up with a shaky smile.

“Indeed I am, your majesty. Just caught a bit of a lousy cold. Should be fine in a couple of weeks.”

He picked up his shears and resumed cutting off weeds in the grass. “So, what does my majesty come to ask of me?”

“Honestly, I didn’t even know you were here,” said Alfred. He took a seat cross-legged on the ground and watched the man work. “So you’re a gardener? Do you only watch this place? And where are all the flowers?”

The man shook his head with a fond smile. “I don’t believe myself to keep up with all your highness’s questions, but I’ll try me best. Let’s see, I am a gardener, and I watch this plot of land here. This is the King and Queen’s private garden, you know. They tell me what to put in here and I do it. At first it was just the queen, he was very kind. His wife? Not so much. They got all sorts of lilies put in here.

“The next set of royals had only recently discovered the place. King Ram, now, he was an imposin’ figure, and a great leader, but he didn’t take as kindly to lowly gardeners like meself as much as the queen. The two talked a great deal about adding lights an’ fountains an’ a waterfall, an’ a whole bunch of expensive flowers brought in from the east. The land over here was bein’ plowed up, you see?”

“So what happened?” Asked Alfred. “Where’s all the flowers? And the fountain?”

“Well, them majesties were killed,” The gardener shrugged. “The Jack had us cease all the work an’ return all the land back, an’ with no orders I can’t plant anything. It’s turned into more of a lawn, really. He was practically raised by the king and queen, you see. He was just a bit over your age, I believe, when he came here, orphaned, and became jack. Probably couldn’t bear to see the garden of the people who’d never see it. But hey! This is your garden now, and you can have whatever you want planted here.”

“Woah,” Alfred gaped. “Anything?”

“Yes sir, anything.” The old man chuckled. “Anythin’ you an’ your queen desire. Speakin’ of which, where is your queen? Are they as young as you?”

“Oh, Arthur’s in the library. He’s kind of a grouch and a bit older, and he kind of hates me.” Alfred shrugged. “It think if I were to get something planted here, I’d have Arthur’s favorite flowers.”

A gleam of amusement came into the gardener’s eyes. He hefted up his shears and faced the young king on his haunches. “And what, exactly, are the queen’s favorite flowers?”

#usuk #fanfiction #aph america #aph england #usukus #ukus #cardverse #usuk fanfic #aph fanfiction #hetalia #usuk fanfiction #fanfic #cardverse au #usuk cardverse #alfred f. jones #arthur kirkland #my writing

[alexswak]

From Castlevania to Boruto: Spencer Wan Interview

I myself had all sorts of questions after watching Castlevania, and seeing that Spencer Wan was so active on Twitter I thought I might try asking him, what resulted in a long interview. The scene he is best known for is the abstract black-lines-only part of the opening, but he had remarkable participations in many other known projects despite his young age. Other than Castlevania, where he animated, AD’ed and directed episodes even, he also worked on Boruto and Invader Zim among others. My notes are in bold. Conducted on behalf of AnimeTherapy and originally posted on their website.

 First tell me a bit about yourself and how you started with animation.

Spencer: You know, that might be the only question I wasn’t prepared to answer. I’m not great at talking about myself. Okay, I’m 25 years old and I’m from a small town in the Deep South. I got into animation after seeing Norio Matsumoto’s work on Naruto. I used to watch it with my friends in high school and I’d never seen anything like it before.  I’d intended to major in illustration when I got into college, but I ended up swapping to animation at the last second because I couldn’t get his work out of my head. I thought maybe I could learn how to make animation like that at school.

Where did you start your professional career and how?

Spencer: So after I dropped out of school I spent a year sort of just wandering around and doing very little with my life. I was having a hard time finding any sort of work, let alone artistic work. I ended up working in a tire shop for a while, actually. Dana Terrace was the one who dragged me out of that. She’s the creator of the show I’m working on now(The Owl House). I’d helped her with one of her student films when we were in school, and she was doing way better than me as a professional artist. She gave me a sort of a pep talk and told me about this animation studio called Animation Domination High Def that was looking for animators.

It's worth mentioning that there aren't very many studios in the United States that hire traditional(hand-drawn) animators anymore. We were even told in school not to pursue traditional animation as a career because those jobs didn't exist. Anyway, I applied the next day, they had me do an animation test, and few weeks later I moved across the country to work for them.

The work I did there was very different from the work people expect from me now. It was mostly parody cartoons, and we had to animate 2-3 scenes a day so it was hard to make anything look very good. It was a difficult job, and it wasn't what I wanted to be doing with animation, but it taught me how to draw very fast.

An interesting backstory, really. So you stuck with traditional animation because you wanted to create something like what Matsumoto makes?

Spencer: That's how I started anyway, but he was just my first exposure to this sort of animation. When I got older I came across the work of Yutaka Nakamura, Mitsuo Iso, Toshiyuki Inoue, etc. They're all incredible in different ways, but I could feel that they were also drawing on something similar. There's a sort of feeling I used to get looking at the work of a really talented Japanese animator, and I really wanted my work to illicit that same feeling.

It would've been a lot easier to change tracks to storyboarding or design. I had enough technical skill to do it, and there were many more opportunities available, but I stuck with traditional animation because I was chasing that feeling. I knew I couldn't be satisfied as an artist until I understood it.

Alright, now to more specific stuff. How did you get involved in Castlevania?

Spencer: Well after working at ADHD, I ended up moving away from LA because I couldn't find anyone who wanted to hire me for animation. I went back to my hometown and spent a year freelancing for scraps. I actually tried to go to Japan for work at one point, but my visa was rejected because I'm a college dropout. It was around this time that Sam(Samuel Deats), the future director of Castlevania, had been emailing me to try to get me to work for Powerhouse. Actually, I rejected him the first time and tried to get my visa through again…

Obviously that didn't work out, so I told Sam I'd changed my mind and I moved to Texas to work for Powerhouse. He'd been telling me the whole time about this awesome secret project the studio might acquire soon. I completely wrote him off because as a freelancer you hear that sort of thing all the time and it's never as good as it sounds. That project was Castlevania. It ended up getting greenlit after I'd been working at the studio for a couple months. Sam plucked me off the animation team to work on it and I started storyboarding on the first episode. It was actually my first time storyboarding, so naturally I was given the scene where the crowd gets attacked by an army of creatures in an elaborate gothic city.

I see. Then can you give me a quick overview of the workflow the staff followed while working on Castlevania? From finished storyboards to finished scenes. I'm interested in the workflow you followed since Castlevania is obviously not your run-of-the-mill project.

Spencer: *laughs* Well in season one it was a constantly changing process. Powerhouse had never handled a TV show before, and so we were sort of creating the process as the show went on. We didn't even manage to standardize our storyboarding process until episode 4. Our background team doubled as our incidental and prop design team, with one of the background artists serving as a part time storyboarder. Sam was the director, but he was also storyboarding and designing all the main characters. His brother Adam, who's meant to be supervising compositor, became our editor. It was all over the place, but it allowed for a lot of experimentation. That's how I came to animate on the show instead of just storyboarding.

I'm getting kind of off topic though- the way it would usually work is that we'd receive an approved script and we'd have a few weeks to storyboard it. We didn't have any revisionists working with us, so if there was a problem, we'd address it ourselves and then Adam would cut together an animatic and add sound. It's worth mentioning that we didn't have any voice acting to work with in season 1, so we sort of had to guess at how the actors would read their lines.

After the animatic was approved we would ship it along with the designs and key backgrounds to MUA Film, our outsourcing studio in Korea. And then in some specific instances we would leave a note telling them to exclude a sequence, because Sam or I had planned to animate it ourselves. After storyboarding was done I jumped right onto animation. We were working with a pencil and paper animation studio, so even though I work digitally, I would have to write x-sheets(equivalent to time sheets in anime) for my work as if I'd drawn it on paper. At some point in the process we decided we wanted to do a much more specific compositing job on the show, and so we had the studio ship us back their cleaned and colored animation, and our in house compositing team would polish it with a mountain of after effects work. A lot of why the show looks so cinematic is because of them.

So I take it this is how it went with the average scene. But your scene in the OP, that got a lot of attention, is clearly exceptional. Can you tell me more about how you came up with this style and scene? Personally I have to admit, it’s one of the best and most striking animation pieces I have seen in a while.

Spencer: Thanks! We really slaved over that opening. It actually wasn't meant to exist- there was no time or budget set aside for it. Sam had done the storyboards for it in his free time and pitched them to the producers. They said we could do it if we could somehow find time for it. I think Sam originally intended to handle the entire thing himself, but when the time came to animate it, I was the only one available. So Sam pulled me into his office and showed me the storyboards, specifically the part at the end. He said something to the effect of, "I know I want this to look like fire. You can do it in whatever style you come up with, as long as it's done quickly." Never in my career had someone put so much trust in me. A lot of people like to compare the sequence to the music video for Take On Me, but when I was trying to come up with the style, the first thing that came to mind was one of Yutaka Nakamura's animations. It's from an anime I watched in high school called Soul Eater where the character goes to draw his sword, and the entire scene turns into this abstract looking sort of river of pencil lines on a red background(this scene). I thought maybe I could do something similar to that. It took me about an hour to realize I couldn't do it the same way, and my imitation of it was coming out far too abstract to tell what was going on. I ended up doing another pass on it, but instead of trying to copy Nakamura's abstract linework, I tightened up the drawings focused on the shadows. I thought I could try to mimic the look of how light shifts around on an ember, and that's where I got the shadows that constantly roll across the characters. The finished result still bears a lot of his influence, but I think I managed to put my own spin on it.

I remember that Soul Eater scene! Now that you mention it, I can definitely see similarities. But the Take on Me? Not really. How much time did you spend on that scene, if I may ask?

Spencer: It was something like two weeks? I don't remember that well anymore. I worked entirely through the last four nights, so it felt longer than that. I remember losing an hour to daylight savings time, and that put me in a really foul mood.

I've never mentioned this before, but it's unfinished. I ran out of time in the end, and so the part with Trevor and Sypha is just my rough first pass. I was devastated when we shipped it that way. At the time I considered it to be my biggest failure as an artist. Ironically it's the piece of work I'm known best for now.

Sypha's scene in the 2nd season is also yours right? Glad to see the same style made it into the show.

Spencer: Adam had wanted to have it in the show for a while, and I really didn’t want to do it. I was so upset about the opening before it aired that I swore I would never draw in that style again. But then the opportunity presented itself and I thought, “Well I guess it would only be for a second or so”. I felt the second time I did it it was a lot less inspired though.

Can't complain myself, it was pretty cool.

Spencer: Well I had more experience the second time *laughs*. I didn’t have to feel around for what the style was.

So moving on. The problem with your Alucard fight scene, that you had problems translating your digital motion guides into paper, you said that also happened for the Cyclops sequences. How widespread was this problem then? Did it only affect your work or the work of other animators as well?

Spencer: It would only affect animations that had large camera movements, that we sent overseas for clean up. It was a problem born from the fact that we don’t really do paper animation in America anymore.

When the camera moves around a lot, the field has to get bigger. You have to use something called panning paper in order for the drawings to maintain a proper size for clean up. But there was no one that I could learn that from. I had to teach everything to myself, and so my first instinct was to make the drawings smaller to fit them on the page. The clean up artists overseas fixed this by scaling the drawings up, but then they had to recreate my spacing from scratch and they didn’t have enough time to do it the same way. The result was that drawings would pop anywhere from a few pixels to a few millimeters out of position all the time. Adam ended up respacing everything, but it wasn’t a perfect match to the original, so drawings tend to pop around. Most people don’t notice it though.

Actually I’ve had a similar issue with other productions where if my spacing gets too tight, there’s a chance a drawing could pop out of place too. I’m still learning how to solve some of those problems.

I see! Shame you found yourself in this situation, but this is a nice segue to another traditional project I want to ask you about, Boruto. You worked on Boruto a few months ago, episode #65 specifically. How did you get involved in this project? You were an interesting case because you are not affiliated with studio LAN like most of other foreign animators in that episode, as far as I know at least.

Spencer Wan: *laughs* I could see why it seemed a little out of nowhere. It's because Chengxi and I had already been talking on twitter for a while. I consider him a close friend. He asked me to animate for him and I agreed. It was as simple as that.

Looking at your original work and the final version in Boruto, I see that it went mostly uncorrected. Why is that? Were you just given a lot of freedom in that episode? Because of Chengxi and your aforementioned good relation with him?

Spencer: Oh, it was nothing like that. I was a lot more concerned with doing the work properly than trying to stand out or show off. Chengxi's storyboards and the model sheets for Boruto were very clear. I followed them to the best of my ability, and my work ended up going uncorrected aside from a light fill being added. I should've anticipated the need for that light fill, actually. I wasn't thinking about how it would look in color.

Boruto is more of a traditional animation(paper) show, right? Didn't you have problems with that this time?  I'm not too knowledgeable when it comes to Boruto specifically, so I don't know how much of its production is digitalized.

Spencer: The process was actually very similar to what I used on Castlevania, only this time there was no complicated camera movement to worry about, and I had Chengxi to help me with parts of the paper process that I didn't fully grasp yet. Some of the other foreign animators helped me out too- namely Guzzu. It was my first time not having to figure it all out on my own, and I was really grateful for that. I feel I learned a lot.

You are right, the nature of this scene is different. I thought maybe it was the Japanese industry being more used to this dual nature of digital and paper. So generally working on Boruto, although a Japanese show, wasn’t different from Castlevania and other shows you worked on before?

Spencer: There are differences in style when it comes to x-sheets. For example, the Korean x-sheets I've written list the layer order completely backward from the Japanese ones used on Boruto. Americans will write "truck out" when they want the camera to pull out, but the Japanese shorthand is apparently T.B for "track back" instead. It's a lot of differences like that, but the idea behind them is mostly the same. It was an adjustment, but not a very big one, and I was told I did an alright job writing them... I hope they weren't just being nice.

I was just watching Castlevania and now that you mentioned him, Chengxi did some animation! Also others such as Hero. Were you the one who invited them this time?

Spencer: I was the one who invited Chengxi. Sam invited the others after I’d left the production.

And you inviting Chengxi and working on #7 was after boruto, I suppose?

Spencer: Actually it was beforehand! He had to cut his work short to start working on Boruto. He did such a brilliant job regardless. That guy is a genius.

Aha, interesting. That was the last of my questions, I'm very grateful for the chance you gave me and for your amazing, detailed answers!

Spencer: No problem! I hope my answers weren’t too boring. That technical stuff can get dense.

#Spencer Wan #Castlevania #Boruto #Interview

[silhouetted-beauty]

“Sharing Is Caring” (Forbidden Love)

Genre: Smut with Slight Angst

Word Count: 11K

A/N: Sorry you guys. I was supposed to have this out a month ago and then I strived for last week but that didn’t work either so here we are now. One day I will make deadline!! Anyways I hope you all enjoy and Happy Readings!^^

*gif credited to owners*

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Jin yelled, watching as you loaded all of your belongings into a bag. Everything from your clothes to small bottles of nail polish, were packed away. What made him even angrier was that, you were ignoring him. You should have been explaining yourself, explaining to him why you felt the need to leave.

“Please tell me that this is some kind of joke.” He mumbled on the brink of tears. It was when you reach the bedroom door, bag in hand; you turned around to face him.

“I’m sorry I had to break it to you like this and I hope, in time, you will be able to forgive me.”

Jin walked to the door just as you walked out, watching you walked down the hallway and right into Taehyung’s bedroom, with him waiting by the doorframe. He made eye contact with Jin before following after you and closing his bedroom door. The rest of the members, uncomfortably watching as the scene unfolded.

~~~~~~~

-TWO MONTHS EARLIER-

Taehyung was spending his day off, lounging around the dorm, either talking with his roommates or playing games on his computer. Actually, he had just spent the past hour and a half glued to his computer monitor. But at that moment in time, all he was interested in was getting something to fill his stomach.

After a playful encounter with Jungkook, Taehyung was walking into the kitchen when he spotted you bent over, your head inside of the refrigerator. At a closer glance, you had a container open and were eating something.

“Ahem...” Taehyung cleared his throat, gaining your attention by scaring you in the process. When you turned around to face him, he stood with his arms crossed and his foot crossed in front of the other, leaning against the counter; a smirk present on his face. 

“I know you’re Jin hyung’s girlfriend but the one thing that makes him angry, is someone eating his food WITHOUT permission.” He stated walking closer to you. “He gets all wound up and explodes on everyone because to him, everyone is a suspect. Now we’ve all blamed each other because no one knew who was eating his food. Low and behold, it was his own girlfriend.”

You held your hands up in defense. “Okay, okay! I get it.”

Taehyung chuckled. “I don’t think you do.” He circled around you like a predator did its prey. “We’ve all dealt with the backlash from Jin and now I’m wondering how will you compensate for our pain?”

“What do you want?” You asked him confused. How were you supposed to make it up to each member as well as keep Tae quiet? He stopped pacing and stood directly in front of you. His eyes trailed down your body and back up to meet your eyes, hinting at the center where your thighs met.

You scoffed, rolling your eyes and pushing him away. “Get lost, Tae.”

He laughed, going to the fridge to retrieve day old kimchi. He always liked to tease you, playing around as if you were his childhood buddy. But something told you, he was serious about bribing him to keep quiet.

“Seriously though, what do I have to do to keep you from telling Jin?”

Taehyung thought it over before his eyes lit up with excitement. “There’s a new multiplayer video game that’ll be coming out soon. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if I came home from practice and it was lying on my bed?” He stated in a somewhat humorous tone before walking away and into his bedroom.

~ 

Just like he asked for, Taehyung came home to the game, lying in the center of his bed. He didn’t think you’d actually do it but you did. At first he was only joking, figuring that you wouldn’t take what he had said seriously. He walked out of his room, about to come find you when he spotted you coming out of the bathroom.

“Y/n,” he called out as he walked closer. When you spotted him, you smiled; already knowing what he wanted. “You didn’t have to do that. I would have gotten it eventually.”

“I know,” you shrugged. “But I also needed to make sure my dirty little secret is kept hidden. Besides, I had a little money left over from my check and I figured, why the hell not.”

Taehyung smiled. “Come play it with me.”

“Oh! No, it’s okay.”

“It’s only fair,” he added. “Come on, I insist.” 

“I don’t even know how to play.” You stated, hoping that he’d just give up.

“I’ll teach you.” Taehyung said, grabbing your hand and leading you into his bedroom.

You couldn’t help but smile at his persistence. You hadn’t never really seen this side of Taehyung, or perhaps you never noticed. He made good on his promise and taught you how to play the computer game. You were sitting in front of the monitor while his chair was placed next to yours. He would occasionally lean in, with his arm resting dangerously close to your waist, as he helped you with a level you were trapped on.

You had to admit, you were enjoying yourself in Taehyung’s company. He made you feel welcome and helped with everything you needed. You almost didn’t want to return to your boyfriend’s room, who was patiently waited for you. You were having fun; laughing at all the side jokes and comments he cracked as he helped you play the game. Not to mention, Yeontan had moved from Taehyung’s arms and into yours. His soft fur felt comfy under your palm as you rubbed him and you hadn’t noticed that the multi colored puppy, quickly fell asleep on your lap.

Taehyung had been watching you closely, ever since you had stepped foot into his room. He found himself drawn to you in a way he couldn’t explain. Even though, you had only been there in a span of twenty-five minutes, he honestly didn’t want you to you go. And when you suddenly turned your head to look at him, Taehyung found himself unable to look away either as you two had an intimate stare down. 

His eyes dropped to your lips and he unconsciously licked his lips; watching as you did the same, wanting to lean in further for a kiss. Both of your minds were absent as you failed to realize the troubles this moment was going to bring. Just as you were about to lean in, Taehyung’s door opened to reveal Jin.

“Kim Taehyung! I should have you arrested for kidnapping my girlfriend.” Jin joked as he stared down at the two of you. You looked back at the computer while Taehyung’s famous box smile appeared as he chuckled. He quickly stood to his feet; hands pressed together, slightly lowering his head as he apologized.

“I’m sorry. I just wanted to show y/n my new game.”

“She isn’t interested in stuff like that. She doesn’t even like watching me play games.” Jin stated with a laugh. He figured Taehyung was probably boring you to death and decided to intervene. Besides, you were his girlfriend. He didn’t want you spending too much time with his band mates.

You didn’t say much as you stood with Yeontan in your arms, passing him back to Taehyung. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” He said, watching you walk out of his room without a second glance. You seemed a bit down and something told him that you were. After you had left, Jin hesitantly stood by the door, staring for a few more moments before leaving out and closing the door behind him.

~~~

A couple days later, Taehyung had run into you when he left his room to go into the kitchen. You were sitting on the island, waiting for your food to heat up. He causally walked over to the fridge to grab something to drink before addressing you.

“Hey, y/n, how are you?”

“I’m okay.” You spoke, never looking in his direction.

“Uh huh... are you sure?” Taehyung asked, not believing you but finally you had looked up and smiled.

“I promise, I’m okay. I’m just a bit tired, that’s all.” You hopped off the counter, grabbed your food, and left out without saying another word to him.

It went on like that for days, you barely acknowledging him or scurrying into Jin’s room without speaking. You weren’t like this before; you had always joked and played around with him ever since you started dating Jin so what changed? Taehyung thought really hard about it. You didn’t begin behaving this way until that day after he had invited you into his room. Even he had to admit that he felt something there and wanted to kiss you, every bone in his body was telling him to....

Was that it?

Did he cross the line with you and somehow make you feel uncomfortable? But he saw the same look in your eyes and figured you wanted to kiss him back. Taehyung ruffled his hair, turning over in bed. Yeontan cuddled against his face before falling asleep. He let out a sigh, letting sleep consume him too. He’ll just have to get to the bottom of it another day.

~

Taehyung had just gotten out of the shower when he heard the door. Rushing to get dressed, he assumed it was one of his members since they had all went shopping; until he opened it. There you stood on the other side, staring up at him.

“Oh, hi Tae.”

“Hi... you do know that Jin hyung isn’t here right now.”

“I know, I just gotten off the phone with him,” you stated, showing him the phone. “Could I wait inside for him?”

Taehyung opened the door wide for you to come inside before closing it behind you. He watched you intently as you took off your shoes and jacket. There was so much he wanted to ask you now that he had the place to himself; he didn’t have to risk someone hearing him. But he also didn’t want you to shutdown or make you feel uncomfortable.

“So... y/n?”

“You looked up at him with curious eyes. “Yes?”

“I... I just wanted to know, was there a reason why you barely talk to me? It’s like you’re avoiding me and I want to know if I did something wrong.” You just stared at him, noticing his eyes were mix with curiosity, hurt,.. and something else, something you tried to ignore.

“No.”

Taehyung refused to accept that one word as your answer. A fire was lit inside him that made him even more determined for the truth. He was going to get answers right here and now.

“Come on, y/n! Don’t bullshit me!” He sighed frustrated. “All I want is to know what’s going on. You’ve never acted so coldly towards me before. Now tell me what’s wrong! Did I do something?”

“No.” You mumbled quietly, feeling guilty for how you treated him.

“Did I say something?”

“No...” you held onto yourself, feeling both your interior and exterior wall break.

“Then what is it? What’s the problem?”

“The problem isn’t you, Tae! It’s me!” You finally told him. “The problem is that after I spent time with you, I want you. And it’s not just physically. I want to know everything about you. Who you are, what makes you happy, and how I can be a part of that? But it’s wrong... it’s all wrong! I shouldn’t be thinking like that.”

Taehyung swallowed hard, trying to slow down the rapid beating of his heart. “Why not?”

You sighed, looking down that the floor. “Because of Jin... because I still love him.” It was quiet between you until you spoke again. “That’s why... because no matter how much I want you, I can’t have you. I would rather you resent me for ignoring you than to hurt you because-”

Taehyung didn’t even let you finish your sentence as he slammed his lips against yours. You wanted him and that’s all he needed to hear. It was confirmation enough for his heart to choose you. What he should have done was let you walk away, let you be happy with your relationship with one of his best friends, let your vent out your feelings then let you escape into the safe haven of your boyfriend’s room... but he couldn’t.

You were initially shocked at first by his actions but that didn’t stop you from clutching his shirt and pulling him closer. Your lips opened before Taehyung could even ask for entrance and thus the passionate kiss begun. Both of you fought for dominance as he led you down the hall and into his bedroom. You gave up and let him take control of you, your actions, and this situation.

Taehyung’s lips left your mouth and latched onto the skin of your neck. He sunk his teeth in, licking over the now sensitive skin; listening as you moaned out to him. He had you pressed against the door, his hand roaming over your body. Yeontan woke up to the noise eager to see both of you but due to the wild nature of things, you were preoccupied at the moment to get him.

Taehyung pulled away, massaging your breasts with both hands. “Daddy’s got his hands full right now, Tannie.” He mumbled, smirking up at you; seductively licking his lips. “Gimme a minute.”

He grabbed the end of your shirt, slowly pulling it up and over your head. Taehyung’s eyes widen at the fact that you weren’t wearing a bra. He unconsciously licked his lips, leaning to take a nipple between his lips. Your head fell back against the door as your hands ran through the soft strains of his dark hair. Taehyung harshly sucked your areola, rubbing his tongue against your hard nipple. You moaned in delight as you felt his hands unfastening your pants. They fell in a pool around your ankles and you stepped out of them, kicking them aside; leaving you naked while Taehyung was still fully dressed.

He pulled away to pick you up, your arms and legs immediately wrapped him for support. Taehyung bounce your body as he carried you to his bed, both of you laughing because of it. He kneeled on the mattress yet you still remained locked on his body. Your lips met again in a steamy kiss as he laid you on your back, lying on top of you. 

“I can’t get enough of you, y/n. I want to taste every inch of your body.” Taehyung mumbled against your lips.

He did just that, kissing everything from your head to your toes. You licked and bit your lips as you watched him kiss your calf. Taehyung could see how wet you were becoming and used his index finger to gather it up, bringing it to his lips. The moment the sweet tangy taste hit his tongue, he couldn’t focus on anything else. Your legs were thrown over his shoulders as he lied between your legs, tasting your pussy for a second time. He wasted no time opening your lips with his tongue. At first your eyes closed, your head turned, and your back arched off the bed but then he was eating you so deliciously, you wanted to see it firsthand. You tried to pull yourself away from the pleasure, just for a second, to sit up.

You had met Taehyung’s eyes in a deep dark stare as his lips wrapped around your clit. Your hand tangled in his hair, moving his head around to make his mouth create friction against your sensitive growing bud. You control his movements while Taehyung control the pace. The fight for dominance appeared again but turned into a game of who will buckled first. A smile slowly spread across your face when he began flicking your clit with the tip of his tongue. You could see the playful lights in his eyes light up as he challenged you. He wasn’t playing fair and you knew it. Your eyes closed and your stomach tightened as the feeling of pleasure took over. Taehyung smiled against your lips at your reaction, he had you where he wanted you; puddy in his hands. Inserting two fingers into your pussy, he stroked over specific spots, listening to the tone of your voice increase. If only he could record you. He’d write a song and sing it to your voice.

Your orgasm was approaching but you weren’t going to give Taehyung the satisfaction of you cumming. Instead, you put the bottom of your feet on his shoulders and pushed him away, no matter how much it pained you to do so.

“Alright! Enough!” You yelled out at him with a laugh. Taehyung couldn’t help but join you as he climbed back on top of you to kiss your lips. You ended up pushing him away a second to go sit up on your knees. “Your turn.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. Taehyung stood to removed his clothes, starting with his shirt but the moment he did, your lips attached to his skin; kissing a trail down his stomach. He watched as you eagerly removed his pants. They barely made it to his feet before you had taken his already hard cock in between your lips. You gripped the base, stroking him further into your mouth and down your throat. Taehyung groaned, grabbing your hair like you did him moments before. He helped guide your movements to increase his pleasure. Taking his bottom lip in his mouth, he bit down; watching as you greedily sucked his cock. Spit dripped down your chin and surrounded your mouth, it was a messy scene and Taehyung loved every minute of it. You weren’t the sweet little princess that Jin portrayed you to be. You were wild and he wanted to see it at its fullest potential.

He began slowly thrusting into your mouth, listening as you occasionally choked. Your hand stroked the remaining shaft that didn’t fit in your mouth. He was so hard that the veins and grooves on his cock stood out more and you felt it under your palm. You stared up at him but his head was thrown back in pleasure. Just the sounds his deep voice made had your pussy dripping. Every bit of this man turned you on that you could barely contain yourself. You needed every bit of him and felt a sense of pride that he was giving it to you.

“Fuck me, Tae.” You moaned when you pulled back from his cock to plant kisses on the head.

He nodded; trying to slow his racing heart that he didn’t know was beating rapidly. He climbed between your legs, guiding his cock to your entrance. Sticking the head into your warmth, he braced himself on his forearms; holding your head in his hands. Your hands rested on his hips and you stared into each other’s eyes. It was beginning to feel too intimate to be a quick fuck between strangers. Your eyes traced over every detail of his face, he was so handsome that it made your heart leap. Taehyung slowly eased forward, causing you both to release a moan of delight. Once settled, he had begun rocking his hips into yours. One of your hands slipped from his hip to rub your highly delicate bundle of nerves. As much as the feeling was taking over your body, your eyes remained opened; watching Taehyung’s every move. You wanted to capture and store everything about him in your memory. Taehyung did the same thing, in the case this was only a one time fling. He wanted to be able to look back on this moment and vividly remember every detail about you.

“Tae...” you moaned. 

His lips crushed yours as his hips picked up speed and the harsh thrusts did not go unnoticed. You wrapped your legs around him, locking them at the ankles to brace yourself. The feeling was becoming too intense that you broke away from his lips to loudly moan in his ear, calling out to him. The once sensual slow lovemaking has increased into a steamy rough fuck. Taehyung lifted himself up on his palms. Sitting back on his knees, he watched as his cock hammered in and out of you. You were so wet and turned on that you both could hear the sound of your pussy being brutally fucked. You didn’t know what to grab onto to so his sheets were the next best thing. 

“Fuck, Tae!” You cried out. The movement to your clit had also increased, causing you to rotate your hips. He suddenly began delivering sharp thrusts that were hitting your spot. “Yes! Just... like that!” 

Your orgasm snuck up on you, hitting you before you had time to react; you could only hold onto his wrists for support. Taehyung, who had felt your walls sucking the life from his cock, wrapped his hand around your throat and fucked you harder. He wasn’t even aware that the two of you were almost on the floor due to the force of his hips. Unable to hold back, he came moments later, spilling his cum into your body. He remained breathless on top of you until he pulled out and fell onto the bed next to you.

“I can’t believe we just did that.” You spoke, trying to catch your breath. Taehyung could only chuckle as he nuzzled against your neck.

“I can’t believe it either,” the more he thought about it the more surprised he was that he didn’t feel guilty. “Oh well, we can’t take it back now.”

“Yeah...” you mumbled, growing quiet that it made Taehyung look up at you. Your gaze was casted to the ceiling and it was easy to guess that something was on your mind.

“You okay?”

“... Jin.” That one name made all his playfulness vanish and replaced with a serious demeanor. “He’s going to be pissed at me when he finds out.”

“Maybe he won’t. Maybe-“

“Maybe you’re being naive.” You stated, looking over at him. “Jin isn’t always happy and cheerful, you know that. What we did... what I did was unforgivable.”

Taehyung sat up to look at you. “Wait a minute. I’m as much at fault for this too, you don’t have to be so hard on yourself.”

“Yes I do, Tae. I’m his girlfriend. I’m supposed to have more self control than this. I was supposed to protect our relationship but I ended up destroying it.... it’s all my fault.”

No it’s not!” Taehyung stated, raising his voice out of frustration. He didn’t feel guilty and he didn’t want you to feel that way either. What’s done is done, there’s no point in regretting it. “It’s not your fault.”

“Tae... you know I love Jin. Despite what we did, I still love him. He does make me happy but as of late, he’s not there emotionally. I feel as though I’m just holding the title as his girlfriend just because. He hasn’t been interested in me or knowing me for some time. I tried to be there for him, be understanding to his wants and needs but in the end, he doesn’t even notice if I dressed up to look sexy for him. Maybe that’s why I became so attracted to you, because you showed interest in me.” You sighed. “But despite these recent negative attributes, if I was unhappy in the relationship, I should have just left. I didn’t have to cheat on him behind his back and that’s where I’m in the wrong, Tae.”

Taehyung thought about it some more and when you put it like that, you did have a point. You didn’t have to cheat on Jin. You could have left him first before the two of you hook up. But in his head, he was still equally at fault if not more. Taehyung knew you were in a relationship with his band mate but he still chose to get closer to you. You may have held the match, but he lit it and now you both had a fire that was likely to burn everything and everyone.

Taehyung sighed, cuddling your body. “If you want to blame anyone, blame me. If I didn’t kiss you, you never would have acted on your feelings and we never would have had sex.”

You couldn’t help but smile, rubbing your hand down his face. This was another reason why you were falling more in love with Kim Taehyung. You kissed his lips, holding him just as tightly.

“Thank you.”

Later that night after everyone had fallen asleep, you snuck away from your sleeping boyfriend and into the room of his friend.

~~~~~~~

Days turned into weeks then into months of you two creeping around behind everyone’s back. On days when you didn’t spend time with Jin, you would wait until everyone was asleep at the dorm before coming over, having Taehyung open the door then sneaking into his room for the rest of the night. He always kept his door lock; just in the case someone tried to enter his room. 

Although you both established you were a couple, you weren’t ready to come clean to Jin and the other members and Tae understood completely. Worse case scenario, nobody would approve the relationship, especially after it was built on betrayal, and it would cause a rift between everyone. He understood but he also disliked sneaking around for so long. It was becoming tiresome and he was running out of lies to tell the others when they would hear him fucking you late at night.

He sighed, lightly trailing his fingers over your skin. “When do you plan on telling him you moved on?” You were facing Tae but you turned over on your stomach, resting your head on your forearms.

“I don’t know, Tae. Is Jin finding out even important?”

He frowned. “Yes, it is.” He moved closer, cuddling you. “I’m tired of sneaking around; he’ll have to find out sooner or later.”

You smiled to yourself. “I rather it be later.” When you turned your head to look at Tae, you noticed he wasn’t smiling. You kissed his lip with a giggle. “Relax, I’m only kidding. I’ll tell him soon, okay? I promise.”

~

Unfortunately, ‘soon’ wasn’t soon enough for Taehyung. He had grown tired of watching you come over just to spend time with Jin and pretending that you were happy being with him. According to Taehyung, you belonged to him and him only. Which was why he stormed into Jin’s room, telling you that you needed to decide right then and there of who you wanted to be with. He knew he was being selfish by putting you on the spot but, how else was he supposed to feel when another member was touching, holding, and fucking his girl? Of course Jin was caught off guard, demanding that Taehyung explain what was going on; to which, he did.

“Y/n and I have been seeing each other for the past couple months.”

Jin nearly lost it, staring quickly between you and Taehyung. “Is this true, y/n?!”

You let out a sigh, getting up from his bed and started gathering your things. Jin watched you in anger. He couldn’t believe what was going on and under his own roof.

“Answer me!” He screamed at you but this did nothing but gain the attention of Tae, who didn’t appreciate Jin being disrespectful.

“Hey hyung! Don’t yell at her! This isn’t her fault! If you want to blame someone, blame me! Yell at me!”

You looked over at Jin, he was seething in anger. Not only did he want to yell at the both of you, he really wanted to kick Taehyung’s ass for going behind his back and sleeping with his girl. By now, a few of the other members appeared at the door and wanted to know what was going on but the three of you refused to say a word. Instead, you walked over to Tae and asked him to wait for you in his room. He agreed but not before throwing Jin an angry look of his own. Hoseok, Jimin, and Jungkook followed after Taehyung, whispering about what happened. Meanwhile, Namjoon waited in the hallway against the wall, listening intently and standing by in case the conversation between you and Jin gotten too heated.

In the end, you refused to give Jin the answers he wanted to know about why you chose Taehyung over him. The moment Taehyung’s door closed with both of you inside, Jin flew into a raging fit; banging on the door, demanding answers from Taehyung.

“Just let it go, hyung.” Namjoon offered, trying to pull Jin away from the door before he broke it down. “I know it hurts but confronting him like you are will only make matters worse.”

With the help of a few other members, they managed to calm Jin down by persuading him to dinner. They left the dorm immediately to give everyone time to calm down. It wasn’t until nightfall when they returned. Jin stared at Taehyung’s door, letting it all hit him at once. You were leaving him. You were leaving him for Taehyung. You and Taehyung had been seeing each other for months without his knowledge. All of the other members witnessed the wild sideshow that was the fall of his relationship.

Jin felt sick to his stomach. How could he had been so blind to what was going on? He remembered there was a time that he banged on Taehyung’s door at three in the morning because whoever he was fucking was being extremely loud. He was unaware that it was your voice, screaming at the top of your lungs because of what a Taehyung was doing to you.

Jin sighed, shaking the thoughts from his head. Feeling defeated, he walked into his room with his shoulders hunched over. That night, he went to bed feeling lonelier than ever.

~

At three-thirty that morning, after checking to see if the coast was clear, Taehyung snuck you out of the dorm. You gave him a quick but passionate kiss before saying goodbye and taking your leave. He smiled to himself as he walked back to his bedroom. To him, it didn’t matter who understood or not, who was with him or against him. All that mattered was his happiness, which you were now a part of.

The moment he walked into his room, he noticed Jimin was sitting in a chair; waiting for him. Taehyung was initially shocked but wasn’t surprised. He figured a few of the members would want to talk to him after getting Jin’s side of the story earlier.

“What’s up?” Taehyung asked with a shrug of his shoulders.

“You know what, Tae.” Jimin stated getting up from the chair. “What happened? Better yet, what were you two thinking?”

“In my defense, I didn’t expect any of this to happen.”

“But it did happen.” Jimin added but when Taehyung’s only response was a blank stare, he grew angrier. “This is serious! This isn’t some random guy whose girl you took. This is our hyung, your hyung! Don’t you think yours and y/n’s actions were a bit harsh? He has feelings too, Tae. Did you even consider them?”

“Of course I did but what would you have liked for me to do?! The situation was going to go bad, no matter what approach I took.”

“There were several appropriate ways to address Jin hyung.” Namjoon added, making his presence known from the doorway. “It was a selfish decision and no matter how you want to look at it, this situation only left ONE hurt person and that isn’t you or y/n.”

Taehyung was quiet as he thought it over. Of course he didn’t want it to go as bad as it did but what was he supposed to do? He loved you and you loved him. How long was he supposed to keep it a secret from everyone? He also loved his members and wanted them to be as happy for him as he was for himself but he knew it wasn’t going to happen. The only issue was with Jin. Even if he went into Jin’s room that very second and told him everything he wanted to know, it wasn’t going to fix the problem. They both wanted the same girl and it was unfortunately that she left one to be with the other.

“It wasn’t my intentions to hurt Jin hyung, that’s the last thing I wanted to do. And if you both want, I will talk to him first thing in the morning.”

Namjoon lowered his head, shaking it. “You should only talk to him if it’s what YOU want. Don’t do it on our behalf because we weren’t the ones who betrayed his trust.”

Taehyung was trying not to let his irritation show. “I do want to talk to him. I want to clear the air but I also feel backed into a corner.” He stated, lowering his voice. “I know what I did was wrong but you guys are making me feel awful for liking someone. I swear to you both that it wasn’t my intent to be with y/n and purposely hurt Jin hyung. No, I want everyone to be happy.”

He sighed. “I know I was wrong but as my friends too, I would like you guys to be happy for me.”

Jimin and Namjoon exchanged glances. They didn’t to know how to respond to that. This situation was bad enough without either Jin or Taehyung thinking they were choosing sides; and they weren’t going to. 

Jimin was the first to say something. “As your best friend, I am happy for you. Your happiness is all that matters to me... but not at the expense of others.” He walked closer. “As long as you understand the severity of your actions and don’t make the same mistake twice, then I have nothing to say on the matter. The rest is between you and Jin hyung.”

He patted Taehyung on his shoulder and walked out of the room, leaving him alone with Namjoon. Both boys remained silent and Taehyung didn’t know what to say to him. Being the leader of the group, Namjoon always had a leveled head and thought logically. So for Taehyung to ask him to be happy for him, he knew there was a high possibility that he wasn’t going to be. Taehyung believed Namjoon felt the only way for the situation to be fair was that neither he nor Jin had you. If you didn’t want to be with Jin, then to even out the problem, he couldn’t be with you either. 

“It’s okay, hyung.” Taehyung sighed, now gaining Namjoon’s attention. “I understand. I know your position is a hard one and it would be wrong of me to add more pressure to that. I’ll just have to continue owning up to my faults and hopefully over time, Jin hyung will forgive me.”

“And if he doesn’t, what will you do? What will happen if he asks you to leave y/n in order for him to forgive you? Keep in mind that we are a team, a brotherhood or like the gears to a clock. If one doesn’t work then the clock is unable to tell time, it is no longer functional or has purpose.”

“I honestly don’t know, hyung. I guess I’ll have to cross that bridge when the time comes.”

Namjoon nodded, turning to leave the room but then he paused. “You’re smart, Taehyungie. I know you will make the right decisions for the group.”

~

Unfortunately for Taehyung, due to their schedule, he was unable to have that talk with Jin the next morning. They all dressed and left the dorm, pouring into the van to head towards a music bank broadcast. When Jin reaches the car, he realized the only available seat was next to Tae, himself.

“I’ll ride in the other car with Yoongi.” He stated coldly, walking away.

“Come on, hyung.” Namjoon started. “Don’t be-“

He was interrupted by the sudden sound of the car door shutting.

“Hyung!” Jungkook shouted after him. He and Namjoon exited the car to follow after him, leaving Hoseok, Jimin, and Taehyung to ride alone. 

The trio remained silent as they rode to their location. Hoseok and Jimin didn’t want to risk saying anything that would make Taehyung feel worse, even though he already was. Even after they had arrived and performed, the aura around the group was extremely tense. Jin and Taehyung never stood within close proximity of each other and when Namjoon gave a winning speech about teamwork, Jin could be seen mumbling something that made Hoseok and Jungkook turn away in embarrassment.

That wasn’t all; Taehyung noticed that anytime he had to get close to Jin during their performance, Jin would take the extra step not to touch him. There were also the side eye glances and the childish mumbling under his breath. Taehyung was growing tired of it and decided to talk to him the moment they made it back home. 

He knocked on the door and waited for Jin to respond. When he did, Taehyung could see the anger take over when Jin noticed it was him. His once understanding eyes now only held a cold darkness.

“Yes? What is it?” Jin asked.

Taehyung let out a sigh, knowing this wasn’t going to be easy. “Hyung, I just wanted to talk.”

“I realize that,” Jin replied smartly. “Did you come to tell me why you chose to betray me? Or how could you, out of all people, choose to sneak around? Or did you decided to confess to me all the things y/n does now that she’s with you?”

“No, I-“

“How she smiles at the silly things you say?” He continued. “Or you catch her staring at you lovingly when she doesn’t think you’re not pay attention... or how soft her body feels when you cuddle her at night... just... how in love she makes you feel in her world.” Jin mumbled the last part softly, getting lost in the memories you both use to share. Taehyung could see his eyes beginning to water.

“Hyung, I didn’t come here to make you feel bad. I just wanted to clear the air and ask for your forgiveness.”

It was then that Jin’s focused was back on Taehyung and could see that the sadness was replaced with anger again. “Why? Do you think you deserve my forgiveness? Would you forgive me if I not only stole your girlfriend but paraded her around here as if she was mines to begin with? Embarrassed you in from of everyone as she walked from your room to mines... or what about all the times I would stay up at night fucking your girlfriend and letting everyone hear, would you forgive me for that?!”

Taehyung knew deep down that he would be livid if he was in Jin’s place and knew that it would take a long time to forgive him. Why would this situation be any different if the roles were switched? Not to mention, it all happened just the day before. It was then that Taehyung realized that his relationship with Jin may never repair itself especially if he allowed time to heal Jin’s wounds. Jin may end up resenting him to the point where they become enemies.

What would happen to BTS if this feud continued? He could see how this affected everyone else and how they were struggling to cope with the tension. Taehyung didn’t want his new relationship to end years worth of friendship. He would just have to work hard to fix it.

Taehyung shook his head. “No, I don’t think I would be able to,” he admitted to Jin. “But, I’d at least try.”

Jin just stared at him in silence and at first, Taehyung thought he may have reached a breaking point but to his dismay, Jin’s facial features only hardened.

“I’m sorry but you and I are two different people and as of right now, I’m not in the forgiving mood.” Jin turned his attention to his phone, focusing hard on it. “I would appreciate it if you would leave me to be alone.”

Taehyung nodded, opening the door to go but before he walked away, he turned his head to look at his elder. Jin attention was still in his phone, refusing to acknowledge his band mate. Taehyung left and walked into his bedroom, taking a seat in his chair; letting his lean back. He released an exhausting sigh, trying to remain positive throughout this ordeal. It was then that he noticed a missed call from you. He immediately called you back, hoping your sweet voice would take him away from his troubles.

“Hey, babe! What are you doing?” You asked, your voice loud with excitement; causing Taehyung to smirk.

“I, um... I wasn’t doing anything in particular. What about you?”

“I was actually thinking of stopping by, I miss you.” You teased and he could hear the pout on your lips causing him to smile to himself. He wanted nothing more than to have you come over and cuddle your body but after Taehyung remembered the conversation he just had with Jin, it would be rude of him to have you come over; especially since there were hard feelings on Jin’s side.

“Actually, y/n... why don’t we meet up another night?”

“Aw, come on, Tae!” You huffed. “I miss you, and I don’t think I can last a day without seeing you.”

Taehyung could only chuckle as he found your neediness cute. He could picture the pleading look in your eyes and the pout on your lips as you gazed up into his eyes. It almost made him want to give in but he also didn’t need any more tension between him and Jin to occur that day, so he held strong. 

“I promise that once we finish practice tomorrow, you can come over and we can do whatever you want.”

You went quiet for a moment before speaking. “...Anything?”

“Anything.” He promised. This seemed to brighten your night as you happily ended the call with your boyfriend.

“Okay! Night, Tae!” Your voice sudden deepened with sultry. “I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.”

~

When you arrived at the dorm, you didn’t think the person to let you in would be your ex boyfriend. Jin opened the door, surprised to find you on the other side. The two of you stared at each other in silence before you cleared your throat, alerting Jin that you wanted to come inside. He quickly opened the door wide, stepping aside for you.

After closing the door and watching you remove your shoes, there were a million thoughts running through his mind that he wanted to ask you. He wanted to know how you were doing and how you felt about all of this, but most of all, he honestly wanted you back.

“Ahem... y/n?” He began.

You stood up straight, looking him in the eyes. “Yes?”

“I... um... was wondering how you were?” Jin asked, trying to hide his nervousness. He had to be gentle and patient because he knew you could shut down at anytime and refuse to talk to him.

“I’m doing great; better than usual. Why?”

“I was just wondering, hoping that you weren’t stressed out by this.”

You were genuinely confused. “Why would I be stressed?”

“Well, you know,” he stated and when you didn’t respond, he continued. “... because of what happened.”

“I can assure you that I’m perfect fine.”

Jin finally reached his breaking point, releasing all the pinned up emotions that he tried to hide. “Come on, y/n, why did you do it? Weren’t you happy with me? Don’t you miss being with me?” He pleaded. You sighed, ready to walk away but Jin stopped you. “I just want answers, y/n.”

“Fine! If that’s what you want, I’ll give them to you! I’ll tell you whatever you want!”

“Why him? Out of all people, why Taehyung?”

“I don’t know, maybe because I like the way he looks at me. He makes me feel wanted.”

“But I’ve never stop wanting you. Why-“

“Not sexually, Jin.” You interrupted with a sighed. “The desire to be with me. The desire to get to know every little detail about me... somehow, that didn’t become an interest of yours anymore. I just had the title of your girlfriend and that’s it. We didn’t go out the way we use to, it seemed as though you don’t really have time for me. I’m surprised you never realize how our connection was getting weaker. I just feel as though I’m one of the guys that you occasionally sleep with but haven’t moved in.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve felt this way?” He felt even worse knowing how unhappy you were and mostly, how unhappy you were because of him.

“How many times do I have to spell it out for you, Jin?! I’ve suggested things for us to do but you would either shoot the idea down or promise to do it later, but that later never came.”

“I was exhausted, y/n! I do have a job that consists of majority of my time, I can’t be with you twenty-four/seven and you know that.”

“I never asked for all of your time, just a little to show how much I mean to you.” Your voice softened as you lowered your head. “Do you even remember the last time we had an actual date and not me coming over to hang out?”

Jin was silent as he tried to mull over the last time he had taken you out but he couldn’t remember. There was a time when he promised to take you out, cook dinner for you, and then end the night bathing together and cuddling up in each other’s arms. You were excited when he initially told you but then he had to cancel due to promotions in Japan. He tried hard to remember if he ever made it up to you but, he was beginning to think that he didn’t.

Jin couldn’t answer and just stared at you, watching as the tears poured from your eyes and down your cheeks. It wasn’t his intention to make you cry, he just wanted you to reconsider your decision of leaving him. Strange enough, he still wanted you back to make things right, to treat you how you deserved to be treated but it seems like his friend beat him to the punch and you were going to make sure he knew it, too.

“Exactly,” you stated, becoming filled with anger. “Tae has the exact same schedule as you yet he still manages to make more than enough to time to make me feel special.”

You walked away feeling more tears run down your face. You had to leave before you had broken down in front of him. Being there; talking to him was upsetting you more than you thought because you didn’t want to leave Jin the way you did, especially for Taehyung. You really loved Jin but you couldn’t take a second longer being lonely and neglected by your boyfriend. But if you were honest with yourself, what hurt you the most was seeing the hurt in his face because of your absence.

You walked down the hallway and retreated into Taehyung’s room, closing the door behind you. Jin remained in place, shaking his head, and wiping away his own tears that fell. Unbeknownst to the both of you, Taehyung was hidden around the corner; listening to the entire conversation.

~

Later that night, Taehyung hugged your naked body close to his; listening to your hiccup sniffs as you wiped away tears. He wanted to be there for you and he was but, his mind was elsewhere as he became lost in his own thoughts.

“You should have heard him, Tae.” You mumbled. “He sounded so angry yet he looked so hurt.” You were quiet for a moment before adding. “Do you think what we did was wrong?”

Taehyung took a deep breath. “Yes, it was. At first I didn’t think so because of my own selfish needs but, after witnessing how hurt he looked...” he couldn’t finish his sentence, thinking back on that conversation and seeing how upset Jin was that you left. ”I honestly think if it was any other guy, this problem wouldn’t have been as big as it is. But because you left him for me; his band mate, one of his roommates, his friend, that’s what hurts him the most.”

You leaned up to look at him. “You know it was never my intentions to break his heart. I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

“Would you ever let him make it up to you, if he could?”

You let out a long sigh, lying your head back down. “I don’t know, Tae. I’m just worried that he will let me down again.”

Eventually, you ended up falling asleep a lot quicker than Taehyung, mostly from being emotionally overwhelmed. You came over with every intention of seducing your boyfriend but ended up having an emotional conversation with your ex that ruin your mood. Instead of fucking his lights out, Taehyung comforted you, making sure you were okay before slowly making love to you. While you slept, he stayed up; still lost in his thoughts.

~~~~~~~

As the days went on, the members of BTS continued to do more promotions and much to Taehyung’s disappointment, Jin had resented him even more since his talk with you. He refused to speak to Taehyung unless it was absolutely necessary, he would ride in another car no matter where they traveled, sit or stand at the opposite end of the group; Jin wouldn’t even look his way.

This, of course, continued to cause a rift within the group. Namjoon and Jungkook constantly tried to talk to Jin while Hoseok and Jimin did the same to Taehyung. Group meetings were a reoccurring activity at the end of each week, which usually resulted in everyone speaking but Jin and Taehyung. Taehyung didn’t know what else to say to Jin, he tried apologizing and tried to better understand his side of it all but he was growing tired of Jin constantly trying to make him look bad in front of everyone, including the fans. Even though he really wanted to, Taehyung didn’t know how to fix the situation especially with someone as headstrong as Jin. His unlikely source of help came from someone he least expected.

~

After another useless meeting amongst members, everyone decided to call it a night, going into their rooms or a different part of the house. Taehyung was about to head into his room when he felt a hand on his shoulder. When he turned around around, he came face to face with Yoongi.

“Follow me.” was all he said and Taehyung did just that, curious to see what he wanted. When they made it to Yoongi’s studio and both of them were comfortably sitting inside, the conversation begun.

“How are we going to fix this?” Yoongi asked with a sigh, causing Taehyung to shrug.

“I don’t know, hyung. I tried to talk to Jin and even apologized but he’s still angry with me. Y/n had talked to him but after their talk, he hates me even more.”

“Jin hyung doesn’t hate you, he’s just deeply hurt. This spectacle involving you and y/n has turned the house on its head, especially Hyung because he was clueless on the ordeal. You do know that they’re deciding not to let her in back in because of this.”

“No, I didn’t know this.” It was quiet before he asked. “Well, what do I do?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Yoongi stated, but when Taehyung still looked confused, he had no choice but to elaborate. “You will have to compromise with Jin hyung. Come up with some sort of agreement between the two of you, something that you both agree with.”

“Like what?”

“That’s something you’ll have to figure out. I can’t give you all the answers.”

“But what am I supposed to do? It’s not like he’s willing to talk to me. Maybe I should just let it blow over.”

“Like I said, you’ll have to figure it out. You’re a smart person; I know you can do it. All, of BTS is counting on you.” Yoongi smirked.

Taehyung slowly walked into his room while in deep thought. What could he do that will not only bring the group together but mend the broken bond between him and his eldest friend? He knew the hardest part was getting Jin to even hear what he has to say. Suddenly, an idea flashed in his head and he figured ‘what the hell’. What did he have to lose? If he thought it out properly and carefully planned it out, maybe he could pull it off.

~~~~~~~

A week later, Taehyung walked down the hallway and knocked on Jin’s door. Thanks to the help of Yoongi, he was able to get the remaining other members out of the dorm for awhile after Taehyung told him, he wanted to do something for Jin. Already guessing what was in store, Yoongi agreed and offered to treat everyone to dinner. Now with the house empty, the rest was up to him.

“Come in.” He heard Jin say, sensing the confusion in his voice. When Taehyung did just that, he could see the anger wash over his face when Jin realized it was him. “What are you doing here? I thought you left with the others.”

Taehyung shook his head placing his hands in his pocket. “No, I figured now would be the perfect time for me to talk to you and possibly make it up to you.”

Jin scoffed, turning away from him. “I don’t want anything from you.”

“But I really want to end this feud between us and want you to listen to what I have to say.”

Jin took a deep sigh and turned around in his seat to face him. “Go on.”

“First, I want to say how sorry I am for causing this. I was behaving selfishly and didn’t think how my actions impacted you or the others. For this, I am truly sorry.” 

Jin lips twisted together and after a moment, he softly nodded. For a second, Taehyung thought he saw his eyes water and it was then that he knew, Jin was tired of fighting just as much as he was. He assumed, Jin was ready to hold this grudge for a lifetime but all he needed was time and a sincere apology.

“Second,” Taehyung continued. “I want you to know that y/n and I would never do anything to purposely hurt you. In fact, she cried to me about how sorry and remorseful she was. With that being said, I won’t blatantly show her off in front of you or show off in any way that is disrespectful to you.” Jin released a sigh of relief. He was worried that he would have to stay locked away in his room just so he wouldn’t have to see how happy you were with Taehyung. “Now I know I still have a long way to gain your trust back but I, at least, wanted to make a start and possibly, go back to the way things were, not just for the both of us but for the group as well. What do you say, Hyung? Do you forgive me?”

Jin stared at his younger band member, sensing that he meant every word that was said. If he had to be honest with himself, he was tired of being the jackass; he didn’t have it in his blood. He could see how his behavior was affecting Taehyung who was trying his hardest to hide it. Jin wanted this feud to end just as much as Taehyung did. They were family, after all.

Jin gotten up and approached Taehyung, embracing him in a tight hug and was happy to feel it back. “Thank you.”

When they broke free, Taehyung beamed brightly at him. “Are you ready for me to make it up to you now?”

Confusion once again appeared on his face. “How?”

“Follow me and you’ll see.” Taehyung smirked.

Jin had followed after him, walking down the hallway and into Taehyung’s room. Once inside, Jin’s voice was caught in his throat as he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. There you were, in all your beauty and glory, tied up to Taehyung’s bed; and not only that, you were also stripped naked. When Taehyung entered the room, you were equally surprised to see Jin right behind him and wanted answers. He had told you he needed to use the bathroom, not come back with another person in tow.

“What the hell, Tae?!” You screamed.

“Yeah, What is this?! What are you doing?!” Jin yelled after you, demanding answers of his own. Taehyung only smiled, raising his hand to silence you both.

“Hyung, this is your surprise. Don’t you like it?” He asked in an amused manner, looking over at Jin who remained quiet. He walked over to the bed and ran a finger down your face and body, addressing you. “Sorry to disappoint, princess, but tonight isn’t about you or me. It’s about making up for our actions, don’t you agree?” You, too, failed to speak when Taehyung spoke to you. All you could do was stare up at him as his eyes stared back into your own. It was as if he was reading your very thoughts as his lips curled into a smile.

“Don’t you think we need to atone for our actions, princess? To give back to the very person who gave me to you and you to me?” As he spoke, Taehyung’s fingers played at your nipple, hardening it before trailing down to the arousal between your legs. His finger gathered your wetness, spreading it over your outer lips. “I know you also want him to make up all the hurt he caused you while you two were together, you told me so. And what better way to do that then to let him pleasure your body. That way he can get out any remaining feelings for you and you can do the same. Don’t you agree, princess?”

By this time, Taehyung had inserted a finger into your pussy and was slowly fucking you with it. When he added a second finger, you moaned out; arching your back off the bed. Your hips begun to gyrate to his strokes wanting to feel more but to your disappointment, his hand slipped away and once again heard his voice.

“I asked you a question, princess. You’re not against Jin hyung joining us tonight, are you?”

You shook your head, waiting on him to continue fingering you but he didn’t. His hand had moved back towards your head and his fingers were placed by your lips. Without further instructions, you opened your mouth and lick and sucked off your juices, moaning in the process. 

You weren’t hundred percent sure why you were going along with this but if this was the only way for Jin to find peace, then you wanted to go along with it for a Taehyung’s sake. It didn’t take a genius to realize how upset he was becoming due to Jin’s treatment. You loved Taehyung, he was your boyfriend, and you were willing to do anything to make him happy.

Jin, however, was the only one who had a problem with it. He wasn’t use to seeing you laid out in such a lewd way. To be honest, it angered him slightly to see that Taehyung had turned you into a whore from him. You were never like this with him and he wasn’t sure if he was comfortable with this or not.

Taehyung sensed this and smiled, walking back over to him. “Come on, hyung. Don’t be so uptight. She likes it and deep down, I think you like it, too.”

“No, I don-“

“Then why haven’t you taken your eyes off of her since you’ve been in the room?” Taehyung challenged. This realization made Jin snap out of any lust filled thoughts he had and turned to face Taehyung. “Look at it this way, hyung...” Taehyung began, walking back over to the bed and sitting on it; facing you.

“Don’t you think that all the hell we went through the past couple weeks wasn’t just our fault but also the fault of the very person lying in this bed? Don’t you think she deserves to be punished for it?”

“I...” Jin answered but his voice got caught in his throat, watching Taehyung taking your nipple between his fingers and twisting it, causing you to cry out.

“Did you know that the others were planning on uninviting y/n to our house for the sake of you? Since we couldn’t see eye to eye and she was cause of the disagreement, they decided that it would be best, if she doesn’t step foot back in our dorm. Would you have liked that? To never seeing her again?”

That statement definitely grabbed Jin’s attention. He wasn’t aware that they were trying to ‘x’ you out of the dorm. Did he really make everyone feel uncomfortable with his pessimistic attitude? He watched Taehyung take your nipple into his mouth, sucking and nibbling on it. You moaned and begged for more but, once again, Taehyung pulled away to speak.

“In order for us to fully make amends, I’ve invited you into the bedroom with us to allow you to get out any remaining feeling you may have for her as well as any resentment you share. What do you say?”

Jin opened his mouth but nothing came out. All he could do was stand like a statue, staring over every inch of your body. How could he jump at the idea of being intimate with you again and you may be uncomfortable with it?

“I.. I’ll only do this if y/n is one hundred percent on board with it.”

Taehyung perked right up, turning his head to address you. “What do you say, princess? Are you on board with this? We wouldn’t want Jin to think there’s a possibility that you would back out.”

You wanted your boyfriend to stop playing around. He knew damn well that you weren’t going to change your mind about what was going to take place in his room. At the end of the day, you wanted to be fucked and honestly you didn’t mind if it came from your ex boyfriend with your current boyfriend’s approval.

“Jin,” you turned your attention to him. “I promise you that I won’t change my mind about what you two are about to do to me. So please...” your head fell back against the pillow as you groaned out. “Just fuck me!”

Taehyung smiled, unfastening your restrains before standing to his feet and moving away. “You’re up, hyung.”

“What?! Me?!... why me?!” Jin asked in shocked.

“Because the lady asked for you,” Taehyung now stood behind Jin, pushing him forward and closer to you. “And we’re not going to disappoint, aren’t we?”

You sat up on your knees, moving towards the end of the bed and closer to Jin. He watched as you pulled down his pants, still feeling a bit hesitant. It’s been months since he last had sex with you and even when you two were together, he was the one who always took the lead. Now, he had to, not only, follow your lead but Taehyung’s as well. His mind was elsewhere but when you placed him in your mouth, Jin immediately snapped out of it.

Even though his cock was semi hard, you still worked earnestly to get him fully erect. You took him all the way into your mouth, wasting no time running your tongue along the veins. You released him, stroking his shaft with your hand while placing soft kisses on it. Jin watched your every move through hooded eyes. You’ve were never this assertive during all the times you’ve sucked him off previously. Perhaps he never noticed or maybe being with Taehyung really boosted your confidence in the bedroom. Either way, he didn’t want you to stop. When you took him back into your mouth, Jin became weak in the knees, stumbling a bit. Taehyung couldn’t help but quietly chuckle, watching as he leaned against a nearby wall. He couldn’t help but feel proud because just like him, you were also good with your mouth.

“I’ve got a better idea, princess.” He suddenly spoken, coming closer to the bed. “Lie on your back.” Confused, you followed his orders; lying back and looking up at both men. 

“Now go back to sucking off Hyung like you were just doing.” Taehyung added.

Jin moved to the head of the bed, kneeling by your head. You wrapped your hand around the base of his cock, taking him back in your mouth and sucking him into your throat as if you hadn’t been interrupted moments before. Now with you both distracted, Taehyung pushed your legs further apart, holding them down at your thighs. One hard lick to your pussy was all it took for you to grab Taehyung by his hair and hold him in place as he ate you out.

You moaned around Jin’s length which caused him to moan with you. He didn’t notice that his hips had begun moving on their own and he was now slow fucking your mouth. He had broken out in sweats that he had to strip out of the rest of his clothes. You looked through your hooded eyes at the body of your ex boyfriend. Even you had to admit how gorgeous his chiseled physique was. But no matter how hard you tried to focus on Jin, Taehyung pulled your mind back to him. He sloppily licked in between your lips, dragging his tongue along your clit. 

You had always tasted so good that he couldn’t help himself. He tried to hold back and let you cater to Jin’s needs but when he watched one of your hand slip between your legs, he had to make sure you were also taken care of; especially after you being such a obedient good girl for him.

Taehyung’s tongue dipped inside of your entrance momentarily, sucking up your juices before letting the tip of it flick and play with your clit. You grunted in pleasure, holding his head still and grinding your pussy against his pink muscle to feel more. Jin was now rock hard and had gripped your hair to forcefully thrust into your mouth. He was seconds away from erupting down your throat when he heard Taehyung’s voice.

“Wait, hyung!” He spoke as he tore himself out of your grip. “Wouldn’t you like to feel something better before you cum?”

Jin knew exactly what he was talking about and it pained him to have to pull away from the warm channel of your mouth, especially when he was so close to cumming.

“Up, princess.” Taehyung spoke, sitting up on his knees. 

With shaky legs, you stood to your feet; watching as Jin took your place on the bed. He lied down on his back and with Taehyung’s guidance, you were straddling his hips; lowering yourself on his hard member. The moment you slid down his length, both you and Jin let out a moan. It’s been so long that you’d forgotten how good he felt inside of you. Jin held on to your hips tight, feeling you contract around him.

Bracing your hands on his chest, you began rocking your hips; slowly riding his cock. Jin couldn’t believe this was even happening. After you had left him, he never thought that he would be fucking you. Just knowing he had one last chance to be with you sexually, he needed to give you his all. Of course he knew that after tonight, you’d go back to Taehyung which was why he wanted you to remember this moment. 

Jin’s nails dug into your skin as he suddenly started slamming his hips up into yours. You were taken completely off guard by his pace that you couldn’t help but look down at him. It was something about the look in his eyes that made your heartbeat speed up. Never have you seen him like this and you had to admit, it was turning you on even more. Even Taehyung couldn’t help but smirk as he noticed the change in Jin’s demeanor. He knew his hyung had it in him; he just needed the right push.

Unable to control himself, Jin sat up; wrapping his arm around your waist. You were shocked to find that you were on your back and Jin was now plowing his cock deep inside you. You cried out, looking over to where your boyfriend stood. Your eyes locked with Taehyung’s briefly but you could tell that he was more into watching you getting your brains fucked out. You gasped out when Jin’s hips picked up speed and you had to hold on to his lower back for support. Your voice cried out more, causing Taehyung to bite his bottom lip. Jin suddenly pulled your hands off of his body and pinned them to the bed, watching as your breasts jumped with each thrusts. His hair was dripping with sweat and he could feel himself approaching his climax.

He honestly never felt more powerful. Here he was fucking his band mate’s girlfriend, on his bed and made him watch. The power and self confidence oozed from his body that it showed in his movements. You couldn’t keep up with his pace and gave up, letting him take your orgasm as his prize. Jin watched your face contort into a frown, squeezing your eyes closed as deep groan escaped from your lips. Immediately after, he felt your walls try to hold him in place but he continued his brutal pace. Minutes later, he couldn’t take anymore and pulled out, quickly stroking his shaft and cumming all over your lower stomach and pussy. 

Jin sat back on his heels, taking deep breaths and wiping away sweat. The three of you were quiet until he was the first to say something.

“Thank you... thank you for that.”

You were too exhausted to say anything. Instead, you turned over on your side and closed your eyes, silently trying to catch your breath.

Taehyung pushed himself off of the wall and walked closer. “So are we good?”

Jin nodded, breathing from his mouth. “We’re good... but,” he laid down on the bed behind you, closing his eyes as well. “Let me just take a small nap here.”

The room, once again, became quiet and Taehyung took note how peaceful you both looked. He watched, with a smile on his face, as his hyung snuggle against your back and fell off to sleep. Taehyung still didn’t have all the answers but at the end of the day, he hoped his solution had worked and now everything can return to normal. As awkward as the situation was, Taehyung wanted everyone to be happy and that included Jin. That was his motto: in the group of BTS, all for one and one for all.

~

©2018 Silhouetted_Beauty

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