#dr james wilson x reader

[star-girl-05]

Love Handles

James Wilson x Reader

Wilson has always been popular with the ladies. He's the perfect man, from his soft brown eyes to his charming smile. Women flock to him, giving him constant attention. Even now in his forties he’s still attracting the attention of women half his age. So why is he so insecure around you? 

It only started recently. He had just gotten out of the shower passing by his mirror when he first noticed them. He couldn’t help but fixate on them. Wilsons had always made it a priority to take care of his body. Though he has gotten a little lax lately. All those cooking classes have caught up to him. Now he has what some call ‘love handles’. 

Almost instantly after making the discovery that he has love handles. He puts on a loose sweatshirt. Deep down he knows that it’s okay to gain weight, that he wouldn’t look like he did when he was twenty forever. Yet he’s still insecure. Especially in comparison to you. You are younger than him, a sight to behold, and your smart as well. 

It was a miracle he could convince you to date him in the first place. He’s reminded of that everytime the two of you go out, watching as men eye you up and down. He knows your not shallow but he couldn’t help but fear you might leave him for one of those men. 

‘STOP’ he silently yells. He’s spirrling, overthinking this whole situation. He doubts you’ll even notice, he’ll just wear loose tees around you. 

“James did you die in there?” you peak your head into the bedroom smiling when you spot him in his mcgill sweatshirt. You just love him him in that. 

“Sorry Honey, I’m coming” he forgot you were waiting on him. He checks once more in the mirror making sure that his newly found love handles are hidden. While he’s looking at himself in the mirror you walk up behind him wrapping your arms around his waist. Or at least attempting to as soon as he felt your hand graze his side he flinches. Both of you freeze at the action, an awkward silence filling the air. 

“Sorry, I was just trying to give you a hug” He can’t help but cringe at your apology. He didn’t even mean to move his body acting on instinct. Now because of that reflex, your apologizing for trying to hug him. 

“Just scared me” he quickly excuses, wrapping you up in his arms. Of course you thought  nothing of the incident. Not until you were on the couch watching a random tv show. You had went to wrap your arms around Wilsons like you always do when he flinched once again. 

“James what’s up with you?” he tries to play it off, but you refuse to drop it. “Are you hurt or something”

“No, it’s- it's nothing” 

“James” the sweet call of his name combined with the look in your eyes has him confessing. You can’t help but reach out for him as he explains why he’s acting so weird. “James you don’t have to worry about those things I’ll love you no matter what”

“I know, I just want to be worthy of that love” 

“You’ll always be worthy besides they call them love handles for a reason. You can’t help but love them” you tease. He chuckles along with you. He still feels awkward about them but he doesn’t flinch when you cuddle up to him. Dipping your hands under his sweatshirt. Your soft hands running against his sides before finding home on his love handles. He may hate them but you seem to love them and to him that’s all that matters.

#dr james wilson x reader #james wilson #james wilson fanfic #james wilson imagine #james wilson x reader #james wilson fanfiction #dr james wilson #dr james wilson fanfic #dr james wilson fanfiction #dr james wilson imagine #house fandom #house imagine #house fanfic #house fanfiction #house md #house md fanfic #house md fanfiction #house md imagine

[the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf]

need a fic where james and y/n ask house to be their baby’s uncle/godfather…

yes, yes, yes, yes. and one more time, yes.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Uncle House

description - y/n asks House to be her baby's godfather. An unusual decision to say the least.

a/n - James, y/n, and House are the definition of that 'you, me and steve' TikTok

Masterlist

Requests open - here

"Let's just do it today and get it over with." Y/n perched on the arm of James' chair as he vigorously penned documents so he didn't have to answer her. She stroked over her 6 month bump, absentmindedly. And as she spoke he found his hand joining hers.

"Maybe, we wait and have the baby tell him."

"Nope come on, we're doing it now. He hasn't got a case buttt he's still on the high of finishing the last one. His heart is ready and open for us."

"Did you mean to make that sound sexual?"

She grasped his hand and pulled him up to drag him down the corridor.

"Come on, you coward!"

'Is this the pregnancy hormones or were you always this mean?"

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

"Sorry?"

James and y/n sat together on the armchair on House's, facing him.

There was a notable silence. Y/n was sat forward smiling eagerly awaiting his answer, whereas James was wishing he could crawl the words back into his throat.

"So, what do you say?" Y/n's smile unnerved House.

"Let me get this straight. In the event of your deaths, I would get custody of your child. Me?"

"I'll admit the decision is an unusual one and I am still trying to understand it myself. But, it's what y/n wants." James delivered a soft kiss to her forehead.

"So I would get your baby?"

"Yes."

"To take care of?"

"Yes."

"To protect from harm?"

"Yes.

"And I'd be able to mould them to believe what I want and teach them my ways and they could be my little prodigy."

"Well--" They both faltered at this and looked at each other. Both suddenly worried about this decision.

"Too late! No take backs!" He suddenly lunged forward and cradled y/n's bump.

"Did you hear that? You're gonna be just like your uncle House!"

House lay his head on her bump with his eyes closed, stroking her bump contentedly. Both James and y/n had pulled back from the unique situation. Seeing as House barely enjoyed touching anyone but his hookers, this was a sight to see.

"Oh my god!" y/n whisper-shouted.

"I know," James answered.

"This is exactly what I hoped for." She finished as she bent down to join in the three-way hug between her, house and her baby.

James was confused by her response. Rather than bring up how unnerving he found the scene, he chose to sit back and wait for his best friend to stop fondling his wife's pregnant belly.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

#dr james wilson #dr james wilson x reader #house md #james wilson #dr james wilson x peds!reader #house x wilson #dr house #dr house x reader #house x reader #james wilson x peds!reader #dr gregory house #dr greg house #house x cameron #house x cuddy #house x stacy #dr chase #dr cameron #dr foreman #james wilson x reader

[kining-the-evil]

Kinktober Day 2: Edging with James Wilson

Warnings: Dom!Wilson, Sub!reader, Fem!Reader, edging, vibrator, pre-established dom/sub relationship, slight public sex

Taglist: @flowercrowns-goodvibes @hurlonsororitygirls

Kinktober Masterlist Other Masterlists

"Please..."

"No." James's voice was firm as he squeezed your hand gently. It was meant to be comforting, but with the vibrator he'd shoved into you before leaving the hotel that morning buzzing against your clit you were in no mood for his comfort.

You were at some medical conference with him, and he had gotten tired of listening to you say how board you were the day before. So, to keep you distracted he made you wear a vibrator all day, on just high enough to make you squirm but not high enough to make you cum.

"James, please. I need-"

"I said, no." He snapped, pinching your hip lightly before walking away to get you both a drink.

You shifted slightly on your feet, trying to find a comfortable stance without making it obvious that something is wrong.

"Y/n!" You turned slightly, seeing Cuddy walking towards you. You gave her a strained smile as she got to you. "Have you seen House anywhere? He's supposed to give a speech later, and I need to give him the que cards-"

You tuned your husband's bosses' voice out when you felt the vibrations go up for the first time all day. You had to dig your nails into your hand to keep from making any noise as you felt yourself quickly approaching a high.

"Y/n, are you okay?" Cuddy pulled your attention back to her with a concerned face. "You look very red."

"I-um. I'm a little warm." You fanned at your face, trying to discreetly squeeze your legs together. Cuddy stepped forward to push the back of her hand to your forehead.

"Did you have a fever today? You feel like your body is trying to break one- oh!"

You felt you knees buckle lightly, and a strong arm wrapped around your waist to stabilize you. "I've got you." Your husbands voice slid into your ear, and you quickly hid you face in his neck.

"Gonna..." You warned, and by a miracle the vibrations turned down. As much as you wanted to cum, you didn't necessarily want to do it in front of your husband's boss.

"I'm going to take her back up to the hotel room." You heard him telling Cuddy before a hand on your back started leading you towards the exit.

Once alone in the elevator, James tilted your head up, pulling you into a kiss. You gripped his shoulders roughly, pulling him closer to your body as you tried to ground yourself.

"Fuck you, James." You mumbled against his lips, making the man frown.

"You should be thankful that I'm taking you up now. I could make you sit through House's speech." He threatened, but you knew it was more bark than bite.

"You wouldn't. He would put together what you did in seconds of seeing me-ahh!" The end of your sentence was cut off by a cry when James upped the vibrations. "Screw you!" James just smiled at your words, stepping away from you as the elevator approached the floor.

"James, I can't walk." You panted, leaning against the wall.

"I believe in you." He promised with a big smile which you responded with a glare.

Just before the door opened you were able to push yourself off the wall and stand up fully. James didn't turn the vibrations down as you walked to the room but did offer his hand to keep yourself steady. Thankfully, no one else was in the hall during the walk, and once in the room you collapsed on the bed.

Your legs were spread slightly as you laid there, still panting from the constant stimulation. James walked over to stand between your legs.

"Keep them spread please."

You babbled something that even you weren't sure what it was meant to be. James spread them just a little more as he pushed the dress you were wearing up and pulled your soaked underwear down.

'You're dripping all over the place, surprised you didn't leave a trail behind you." He pulled the toy out of you, and you let out a loud moan at the feeling of no longer having constant vibrations. But you still wanted to cum.

"Please..." You whimpered, making James lean down and run his hand over your hair.

"What, you want to cum?" You quickly nodded, whimpering before he shushed you. "Too bad. You're still in trouble from yesterday, and I have to go down for the speech. Now stay here, rest up, order some food if you want, I'll be back later. And don't even think about touching yourself, because I will know." A few tears ran down your face as James walked towards the door, leaving you alone in the hotel.

#house md #house md x reader #dr james wilson x reader #james wilson x reader #james wilson imagine #james wilson #james wilson smut #house md smut #kinktober 2023 #kinktober #kinktober day 2

[shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey]

Doctor's Orders

a james wilson x gn!reader one-shot

SUMMARY: Wilson sprains his ankle, and you get to take care of him.

WARNINGS: minor injury (a sprained ankle)

WORD COUNT: 1217

The sound of faint laughter and televisions echoing through the hallways of your building made you feel at ease. It had been a long day, and to say you were relieved to finally be home was an understatement. You reciprocated James’ warm smile as you walked through the door he was holding open to your condo complex. 

"Oh, do we need to check the mailbox?" you asked him, in a half-whisper. He shook his head, and you ascended the well-worn staircase leading to your cozy condo, with James trailing just a step behind.

“Anyway, like I was saying, I think it gets too much hate. It was a fun movie,” you exclaimed, continuing up the stairs. James responded with a disapproving shake of his head.

“Agree to disagree,” he retorted playfully.

You sighed. “I’m never going to be able to convince you otherwise, am I?”

“Not a chance,” he replied, allowing his gaze to momentarily linger from the stairs to admire your presence. “And I’m never going to forgive them for what they did to–”

Suddenly, a resonant thud echoed behind you, followed by a pained groan. You gasped, and your hand instinctively flew to cover your mouth.

“Oh– James, are you okay?”

He groaned in pain. Your heart pounded as you leaned your bag against the post at the top of the staircase before you rushed to help him.

“Here, let me help you up,” you offered, placing his arm around your shoulders and assisting him back onto his feet. He winced as his injured foot touched the ground, and you gripped the handrail tightly as you bore his weight.

"These damn stairs,” James muttered, “I really should learn to be more careful.”

"It happens to the best of us,” you reassured him, sympathetically. “Let’s get you inside and sit you down, then we can take a look at it.”

You left him waiting at the top of the stairs as you descended again to retrieve his briefcase. 

“Thanks,” he said softly, smiling fondly at you as you picked up your own bag and helped him limp to the door to his condo. Once inside, you eased him onto the sofa.

Sitting across from him on a cushioned footstool, you looked at him expectantly as he carefully examined his injury for a few minutes. You were comforted by the familiar impression of intense focus on his face; you’d seen it in his eyes doing everything from the New York Times crossword puzzle to diagnosing his cancer patients. You could practically see the gears turning in his brain when the radiator's subtle hum, unnoticed until then, ceased, leaving behind a quiet void in your condo. After a few more minutes, the weight of the silence finally became unbearably uncomfortable, and you asked:

“So… what is it?”

“Well,” he sighed, looking up at you, “I don’t think it’s broken. It feels like it’s just a sprain. Some ice, compression, rest… and I should be fully healed in a few weeks,” he said, before lifting himself onto his feet. You got up from your seat and stopped him before he could make another move.

“Okay, but the acronym is RICE. Which, if I remember correctly, means the the first rule of healing a sprained ankle… is to rest,” you pointed out, matter-of-factly. 

“Yeah, but the next one is ice. I’m going to get ice before I res–”

“Hey,” you said, looking at him with feigned sternness. His eternally pleading eyes made it so hard to get genuinely angry with him. You placed your hand on his chest and lightly coaxed him back down onto the sofa. He pursed his lips and obliged, never breaking eye contact. 

“I know you’re a fancy doctor and everything but just… let me take care of you, okay? Relax, I’ll get you what you need,” you said, softening your tone and tenderly stroking his face with your thumb. You sealed your sentiment with a gentle kiss on his cheek before heading to the kitchen to get ice. James’ gaze softened and he smiled as he watched you make your way to the freezer before he picked up the nearest magazine. He swiveled on the sofa to lay back and let his injured foot rest on the armrest.

When you returned with some ice wrapped in a towel and a compression wrap, you found James nodded off with his magazine open on his stomach. You lightened your footsteps as you approached him to avoid disturbing him, a gentle smile creeping onto your face. Kneeling on the floor by his head, you cupped his face with your hand and gingerly stroked his cheek, then lightly ran your fingers through his soft curls, stirring him awake. 

“Hmm?” 

“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” Your fingers tingled as you felt him melt under your touch. “I got some ice and a bandage. For compression, right?”

“Yeah,” he said, rubbing his eyes. You got up off the ground, pulled the footstool over to the sofa’s armrest, and applied the ice to his ankle. He lifted his head just barely enough to see what you were doing. There was a subtle glint of worry in his eye, and you reassured him it was going to be okay.

“You can go back to sleep, you know,” you whispered. James let his head fall backwards and stared blankly at the ceiling, letting his thoughts wander, first shuffling through his list of dying patients, then to plotting how he was going to get back at House for that stupid prank he had pulled on him earlier, then to how he forgot to ask Cuddy about the budget for new equipment for the oncology department, and finally back to you. Every aspect of his job as an oncologist dictated that he was to be a caretaker, and to have someone take care of him was overwhelming, in a good way. As a generally independent person, he wasn’t used to being shown this level of compassion. He felt his heart grow warm thinking about how lucky he was to have you looking after him, how good you were to him, and how much he loved you.

“All done,” you whispered, satisfied with your work. Wilson once again looked up at his now-bandaged foot, then at you. His movement startled you briefly, as you assumed he had gone back to sleep like you had suggested. “Woah, I thought you were asleep? I was just about to go get a sticker for you, you were very well behaved,” you grinned.

He rolled his eyes playfully and unsuccessfuly tried to suppress a smile. “That’s a solid wrapping job, perfect even.” he approved. Your eyes sparkled with pride, and he instantly felt a familiar warm, fuzzy sensation coursing through him. Just as he was about to open his mouth to speak, you planted a tender kiss on his lips that left him feeling entirely flushed, and as you were about to walk away, he grabbed your hand and pulled you back in for another kiss, this time more passionate. 

“Mmm… just what the doctor ordered.” His warm breath lingered against your skin, and his expression turned more serious as he looked into your eyes. “I love you, you know,” he confessed, earnestly.

“I know,” you giggled. “I love you too.”

@iamthatonefangirl @dr-juliaogden

#this is my very first one-shot ever #please be nice :') #james wilson #james wilson x reader #dr wilson x you #dr wilson x reader #dr james wilson x reader #dr james wilson x you #house md #house md fanfiction #house md x reader #house md fic #dr wilson

[ghostlygeto]

elevator | james wilson

pairing: james wilson x fem!reader

warnings: more selfship! it’s all i write basically hehe, forced proximity, reader is referred to w she/her, reader is snippy and wilson is awkward, no romance just awkwardness, reading panics a little cos in small space, wilson comforts her, HAPPY ENDING :D but not romance. house’s shenanigans. not proof read….

word count: 2.1k

it was simple. walk from the morgue to the elevator, get off on the first floor, go to your car. at least it should be that easy. though for some reason this was always the hardest part of your day. it was the time you’re the most likely to see wilson, which made it the hardest.

you checked your phone, the time reading 10:07pm. technically he should be home by now. he usually tried to get all his things done and leave by 7:45pm. at least he used to. you hadn’t spoken to him in ages, not since the night you called him crying. but that was close to a year and a half ago now, maybe even two. you tried not to keep track, you realized after awhile that it caused more harm than good.

regardless, you make your way toward the elevator. first before you can leave you have to stop by house’s office, as he requested an autopsy report on one of the bodies recently brought down (why didn’t he do it himself you would never understand) and requested it be hand delivered, of course. you weren’t sure when you started giving in to his obscene requests and dealing with his sub-par personality again but you had, and unfortunately you weren’t hating it.

in a way it brought a sense of normalcy back. as much as you may hate to admit it.

“house,” you pushed his office door open, a little surprised to still see him here. “here’s the autopsy report you asked for.” you held up the folder and set it down on his desk. “i’ll see you tomorrow.”

“yep. tomorrow.” house raised his eyebrows and gave a fake smile, “have a good night!” there was something hidden in his tone, but you chose to ignore that for the time being. it didn’t matter now, you were going home. that is what mattered right now.

you turned your back to him, trying not to overthink the way that house was talking. you had known house long enough to know that most of the time he had ulterior motives. rarely did they include you, but you knew better than to think you were safe.

you pushed the elevator button to take you to the main floor, sighing as you heard footsteps behind you. because of course you couldn’t just ride the elevator on your own. the universe just didn’t work that way, not for you.

the elevator doors opened and it wasn’t until you pushed the lobby button that you saw the other person in the elevator.

“wilson,” you nod your head, forcing a smile as a greeting. the elevator ride would be two minutes, max. but god the idea of having to stand here with him for even that long made your stomach churn.

it’s not like it was your first time seeing him in three years. you work in the same building; even if he is on the fifth floor and you’re in the basement there are moments of overlap. catching glimpses of each other in the corner of your eyes or seeing each other in the cafeteria. but it was your frist time being in such close quarters to each other as soon as the doors closed you felt like you were suffocating. it was miserable.

wilson didn’t say anything in response. you didn’t turn to look at him, but you can imagine that he had his brows furrowed trying to figure out what you were doing on the fifth floor and what he could say to you to make things feel less tense. the answer to the second question was nothing.

“it’s late, what are you-” wilson’s sentence was cut off by the shake of the elevator stopping. both of your eyes shot up to the screen that showed what floor you were on, but it just flashed it’s lights at you.

great. of course the elevator decided to get stuck right now, at 10pm, when you were alone with wilson.

“are you serious,” you grumbled, hitting the door with the palm of your hand a few times before repeatedly pressing the lobby button. “of course this would happen. just my luck.” you rested your forehead on the cool metal, trying to calm yourself down. this was fine. everything is fine.

“i’m sure whatever the issue is they’ll have fixed soon.” wilson attempted to comfort you, knowing you already hate elevators as-is. he couldn’t have known that his words were only going to make you feel worse, the very sound of his voice making your stomach churn.

“right.” you nodded, correcting your posture and moving away from the door. the two of you stood in silence for two minutes before you gave in and sat down, putting your head between your knees.

wilson watched you carefully, clearing his throat and beginning to speak as he did so. “so, y/n. how- how have things been?”

“i’d prefer if you call me l/n,” you answer quickly, “things have been fine. i’m fine.” you could see the way he frowned from the corner of your eye when you asked him to call you by your last name. you didn’t want to have conversation, and you didn’t want him to treat you like a friend. because you were coworkers. nothing more, nothing less.

“don’t be that way,” he sighed, leaning against the opposite elevator wall and sinking to the ground. “you’re seriously going to make me call you by your last name?”

“why would you call me anything else?” you ask, tone harsher than intended. why were you being this way? maybe it was a defense mechanism, “you don’t call house greg, and he’s your best friend. i don’t see why you’d call me anything other than l/n. we’re coworkers.”

coworkers. that drew a scoff from wilson, “coworkers? that’s how you want to describe us?” wilson looked away from you for a second before running a hand through his hair. “i guess not talking for close to three years does take us back to square one. you’re right.”

“don’t do that,” you sneer, looking at him to meet his questioning gaze. “don’t say the you’re right thing to me. you only say that when you have something else to say. if you’re thinking something, just say it, wilson.”

wilson looked at you bewildered for a second before laughing, “jeez, you really still know me that well?” he shook his head, “i don’t think time can turn us back into coworkers, is all. i don’t think we’ll ever be back to just that.”

“strangers, then?” you offer, uncharacteristically cold. maybe you’d been spending too much time around dead people to remember how to socialize properly. or worse, too much time with house.

“quit being like that.” he shook his head at you, “just because we haven’t spoke doesn’t erase all our history as friends and…” he fell silent for a second before clearing his throat again. “beside the point, we aren’t strangers or just coworkers and you know that, l/n.”

you wanted to argue with him more, but you didn’t have it in you. not when you felt like the walls were shrinking with every breath you took. “fine.” you didn’t say anything else for a few seconds before speaking up again. “how’s your wife?”

wilson stiffened. bad, then.

“we actually never got married. she decided a few months before the wedding that she couldn’t handle being married to a man who is at work so much.” wilson rolled his eyes, “as if she didn’t have all the time in the world to decide that. had to wait until we were about to get married, right? how are things with your boyfriend?”

“i broke up with him shortly after…” you paused, knowing that the answer was shortly after the phonecall you two shared god knows how long ago. “i told my therapist about him, and she said that i should be with people who make me happy. not miserable. so i broke up with him.”

“i see.” wilson nodded, picking up on the fact that you were keeping part of the information from him. it didn’t matter, though, it wasn’t really his business. aside from the fact that he still cared about you, he had no reason to push for more details. “good for you, then.”

silence overcame the two of you once again, looking at the clock on your phone in hopes that it would somehow make the elevator magically work again.

it didn’t.

“it’s been ten minutes,” you groan, “what is taking them so long? you don’t think we’re like…stuck stuck do you?” you looked over at him, panic filled eyes as the thought sneaks its way into your head.

“why, you have somewhere important to be?” he raised an eyebrow before getting serious. “no, if we were stuck stuck i think cuddy would’ve called one of us by now. probably just an issue with something electrical. we’ll be out of here soon.”

you sigh, resting your cheek on your knee. “i have no one to be other than my bed it’s just…” you wonder if saying this is the right thing, but it seemed there was nothing better to do than to talk to each other. “being around you is hard. i feel like i’m going to explode. i want to explode.” you look at him, the slightly bewildered look making a smile creep up on you. “and making stupid small talk is killing me. it’s hard to be normal around you because i’m not sure what normal should be with us.”

wilson paused for a second. to be honest, he also didn’t know what normal was supposed to be between the two of you. but he wanted you to be comfortable with him. at the very least he wanted to be friends again. “i don’t know either. but we won’t know until we try, right? even if we have to relearn what normal means for us. we can do it. i’m- i’m willing to try. for you.”

“quit looking at me like that,” you roll your eyes a little, almost laughing as he feigns offense. “i suppose, maybe, i’d be willing to try and relearn. for you.”

a smile broke out on wilson’s face as his shoulders dropped, relief clear in his eyes. “things’ll be good. being friends will be good.” he sounded like he was trying to assure both of you (because he was) of the fact.

it seemed on cue that as you two made amends, the elevator started working again. you both sighed happily and stood from your places on the floor, relieved to be out of the metal death trap.

“i’m never getting in another elevator,” you mumbled, dusting any debris off your lab coat as the door opened. “i’ll see you soon, james.” you waved to him, quickly making your way out of the building and to your car. you passed house on the way, silently wondering how long he had been waiting in the lobby for wilson.

“so,” house tapped his cane against the ground as he approached wilson, watching you walk away. “how’d it go in there?”

“you had something to do with the elevator?” wilson wanted to be surprised, but at this point he was so used to house’s antics that he should’ve guessed it from the start. “you are unbelievable. you know she hates small spaces, you could’ve caused her serious issues-”

“but you were there with her. she would’ve been fine.” house rolled his eyes as the two of them started walking, “i was tired of both of you moping around. it was clear neither of you were going to make the effort, so i did it for you.”

wilson looked to his older friend bewildered, “you did something for the better of two other people? and you don’t get anything out of it? jeez, if i didn’t know any better i’d say you were a clone.”

“i am a clone,” house replied quickly, “and i do get something out of it. i get to be done hearing your longing sighs as you watch her walk past, and i get to stop seeing her stupid pouty eyes when she sees you in the cafeteria.” he paused, “do you want to get something to eat?”

“sure, house.” wilson accepted the offer, despite knowing he’d probably be the one to pay. “whatever you say.”

comments, reblogs, nd likes appreciated!!

#james wilson x reader #house md x reader #dr james wilson x reader #mine !! #jami !! #wilson x reader

[bi-bard]

Misdiagnosis - James Wilson Imagine (House M.D)

Title: Misdiagnosis

Pairing: James Wilson X Reader

Word Count: 1,108 words

Warning(s): none that I'm aware of

Summary: [Season 4, Episode 9] After discovering he had misdiagnosed a patient, Wilson is left in a spiral of thoughts. (Y/n) tries to pull him out of it.

Author's Note: A while ago, I had a House MD OC. I deleted it because I wasn't happy with it. The planning was shaky, and I didn't really like the OC's storyline. So, I went back, I replanned it, and now we have a better House MD OC that I am much happier with. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

FIND MORE OF THIS OC BY CLICKING HERE

-----------------------------

It wasn't common that Greg voiced his concerns to me.

Even when he did, he was never clear about them. He acted like he didn't care and was just making jokes about other people's misery. I could usually see through it.

So, when he came in joking about how James was going to be sued by a patient because the patient was going to live, I understood what he was saying.

"And why did you tell that patient that they had a solid case," I asked, folding my hands together and resting my chin on them.

He dramatically scoffed. "You think it's me?"

"You have very weird ways of intervening when you think someone is being stupid," I shrugged. "Plus, no lawyer would actually tell him that he had an actual case because he was going to live."

House sighed and plopped onto the chair on the other side of my desk.

"Now, why did you do that?"

"Because Wilson was being an idiot," he explained.

"More detail, please."

"He was going to pay that man because he gave that man good news."

"And now, you're here because you want me to go get him to agree with you?"

"Use your psychologist babble."

"You can't only acknowledge my job when you need me to do something."

"I can if I'm asking you to help our friend avoid becoming self-destructive."

"Self-destructive?"

"You won't know for sure unless you talk to him."

Greg pushed himself out of the chair and walked out of my office. I let out a huff and shook my head. He knew exactly how to get under my skin. Asshole.

I found myself outside James's office a little while later. I sighed before knocking on the door. He pulled the door open.

"How did one of you learn to knock and the other one sometimes climbs across to my balcony," James asked.

I just shrugged. He motioned for me to walk in. I took a moment to look out at the balcony once I had.

"You could put tinfoil along the top," I said. James had his eyebrows furrowed when I looked at him. "Like when you have a cat that keeps jumping onto your counter. You put tinfoil along the top and something about the noise spooks them."

"Are you comparing your brother to a cat?"

"It's probably the nicest thing I've compared him to."

James laughed and shook his head, going to walk back to his desk.

"Were you really going to pay a patient for giving him good news," I asked.

He paused, looking at me for a moment before speaking, "House sent you here?"

"He said you were becoming self-destructive," I replied. "Not that I really believe him, but I was very curious-"

"It was 6,000 dollars-"

"Why?" my eyes went wide.

"I... I gave him six months to live," he explained. "He needed the money after he sold his house. He had a trip to Venice planned! I... I wanted to help him."

"This is about the false positive patient?"

"Yes!"

I sighed. "Okay..."

"Don't psychoanalyze me."

"Your guilt surrounding your patients is unhealthy-"

"(Y/n)!"

"Listen to me," I stepped forward and leaned on the desk. "I can't say why, but I think you're feeling unnecessary guilt around events that aren't your fault."

"I gave that man the wrong diagnosis-"

"Because of a false positive," I replied. "At the end of the day, medicine is a field with very little control. I think your guilt is an attempt to control what you can't."

He didn't respond to that.

"I should know... I deal with the human psyche," I shrugged. "Even more variables than the physical body."

He raised an eyebrow at me.

"Wrong diagnoses happen," I continued. "Sometimes they're completely out of our control. And sometimes they work out for the better, sometimes they don't. This last patient was one of the good outcomes, no matter how that man sees it. You cannot control the actions of another person when they believe that they are facing the end of their life or how they choose to handle learning that they aren't. You are not responsible for that. You are responsible for giving that man the correct diagnosis. That's it."

James continued looking at me for a moment before sighing and responding, "I see why Cuddy hired you."

"She does better with two voices of reason than one."

He grinned at me. I pushed myself back, so I was standing up straight again.

"So, do I still have to worry about you becoming self-destructive," I asked.

He scoffed. "I'm not the self-destructive one in your life."

"Yeah, but you're more willing to let people help you," I replied.

I opened my arms and waved him over. He raised an eyebrow at me. I just waved him over again.

He walked over and let me pull him into a hug.

"You're doing a good job, James," I muttered. "I promise."

"Thanks," he mumbled before stepping back and grinning at me. "You have no idea how much hearing that means to me."

I don't think I could've formed a good response to that statement. I don't know if there was one. Saying something like "you're welcome" risked the chance of looking egotistical. Trying to shrug it off could've looked ungrateful. No response felt like it was good enough.

I didn't have to worry about that for long.

I barely had a moment to overthink my response before James leaned over and pressed his lips to mine.

I leaned back a few seconds later out of complete shock.

"I... I'm sorry," he said immediately. "I... I don't know why I did that-"

"It's okay," I stopped him. I started walking toward the door. "Really, it's fine. Just fine. I just... I have a lot of work to do. This was meant to be a quick visit. I'll... I'll see you later."

"(Y/n)-"

"I'll see you later," I repeated before leaving and closing the door behind me.

I looked around, feeling like everyone knew what happened or could easily figure it out by looking at me. I shook my head. Spotlight effect. I knew that.

"Shit," I muttered to myself before running my hands over my face and starting to walk back to my office.

It wasn't that the kiss was bad. It was the exact opposite. It was perfect. That was the problem.

It felt like years of friendship were teetering very delicately on a rope and whatever happened in James's office tried to push it off. And I couldn't tell if I would've been upset but that idea or not.

And that terrified me.

-----------------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

#dr james wilson fanfiction #dr james wilson imagine #dr james wilson x reader #james wilson x reader #james wilson fanfiction #james wilson imagine #house md x reader #house md imagine #house md fanfiction #house imagine #house fanfiction #house x reader #imagine #fanfiction #x reader

[cyberstrm]

doll

dr james wilson x gn!afab!reader

18+, minors dni!!!! nsfw ahead

"j-james...fuck!!" you screamed between intermittent squeaks after each of james's thrusts.

"keep it down, doll..." he groaned, slowing his pace. you nodded, dazed, and he started again. nuzzled into the crook of his neck, you moaned into his skin, eventually biting his shoulder to sequester your loud moans and whines.

"you're so beautiful...so needy for me..." he mumbled, voice quivering with pleasure.

"j-james i'm....i'm g-gonna c-cum....j-james!!" you had to unclench your jaw from his flesh to speak. your walls squeezed and quivered against his cock, sending him over the edge at the same time.

he pulled out gently, trying not to hurt you in your sensitive state. he pulled your dazed body close to him, kissing your forehead in the process.

"c'mere, doll.." he whispered, pulling you close. "there we go..."

#dr james wilson #james wilson x y/n #james wilson x you #james wilson x reader #house md #x reader #x you #x y/n #x gn reader #dr james wilson x reader

[fleurrypoet]

Hi can you write a few headcannons on how James Wilson would comfort reader if she’s just recently married to him and pregnant(she hasn’t told him yet) and she’s worried about his infidelity to other women affecting their relationship? Thank you 😊

This is a good one thanks for the request 🥰 hope you enjoy

If their already married I feel like the reader would have been different to James's other wives as from like the minute they started their relationship she would've told him that she did not want it ending how the the rest of James's marriages had ended. so like James would have reassured her multiple times that it wouldn't end up like the rest. This is why it does take them awhile to get to the marriage stage not because they don't love each other but because Wilson is afraid of messing it up and the reader is afraid of what it will end in.

though they do because they love each other and no doubt they have talked multiple times about children and it is clear that they both want kids. like all the reader has ever wanted was to be a mother and she can't wait to see James as a dad. though lets face it their both busy and recently married so I think they put it at the back of their minds figuring they will have the conversation again in a couple months or maybe a year.

though then the readers period is late like two months after their honeymoon and she puts all the symptoms such as sickness and fatigue all together and realises that she is pregnant. She is over the moon the one thing she has always dreamt of is coming true and it's happening with the man she loves. though then it washes over her the fear of James leaving, of him finding comfort and love in another woman and leaving the reader and baby alone. their is a big part of her that is telling her she is wrong and this is what James wants. But then the other part is referring her back to the fact that he cheated on his previous marriages ended in him cheating.

i feel like this goes on for days Wilson doesn't notice her pregnancy symptoms probably because they are masked by her pulling away from him which he can't understand why. she starts to spend longer hours at the hospital and going in before James so he basically hasn't really seen her in a couple days. considering the fact that James's third marriage ended in his wife cheating on him he starts to get a bit worried that maybe this is happening again. so it all boils down one night after dinner the reader has barely spoken all night and he just comes out and asks her if she's cheating on him.

the look of shock on her face tells James instantly that he was wrong and she's not but she's upset questioning why he would even suggest that she was the one cheating when he's the one prone to it. James explains why he though she was and it just led to her breaking down into tears realising that her being distant led to her husband questioning himself good enough for her.

so in the midst of it all she just tells him she's pregnant quickly followed by her spewing out what she'd been thinking about him leaving and cheating on her now that she is pregnant. James is overjoyed at the fact that he's going to be a dad but it pains him to think that his past mistakes have put his wife through all this stress so early in her pregnancy.

at his point all he can do is hug her and remind her that he loves her. then once the crying from both of them has subsided James leads her over to the couch and reassures her that he will never cheat on her. she half jokingly states that she will look awful when she's the size of a whale or when she's all tired from a crying baby keeping her up. though James reminds her again that he wants to be a dad and he loves her, stating that she wont look like a whale and he will also be tired from a crying baby but nothing will change the fact that he wants this and he wants her.

they both just end up spending the night on the couch as close to each other as they can planning their future and feeling relieved that the finally talked about what was bothering them.

#james wilson x reader #james wilson #rsl #robert sean leonard #dr james wilson #dr james wilson x reader #house md

[feline-bookish]

Something new…

I want to write reader inserts. While I’ll keep up with my OC writing I want to keep the door open to add more than just that and leave you guys empty of my content when I have no ideas for that OC.

Here’s the thing, my OC writing would take more planning than reader inserts because it fits a timeline for that OC. With a reader insert I can just use a prompt and a character.

Speaking of which, my inbox is open! Have a request for the following characters? Send it in!

Have Written:

Darkiplier

Yancy

Carlisle Cullen

Dr. Iplier

Dr. James Wilson

Lucifer Morningstar (Fox)

Dr. House

Prince Sidon

Have Not Written (but want to try)

Dean Winchester

Sam Winchester

Castiel

Dr. Strange

Iron Man

#fanfiction writer #fanfiction #ao3 fanfic #fanfic writing #ao3 writer #fanfic #fanfic blog #creative writing #carlisle cullen #carlisle cullen x reader #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean x reader #sam x reader #sam winchester #castiel x reader #castiel #ahwm yancy #iswm yancy #yancy x reader #darkiplier #darkiplier x reader #dr james wilson #dr house x reader #dr james wilson x reader #james wilson x reader #james wilson #james wilson fanfiction #iron man #iron man x reader

[deadxregulus]

That is the only thing i think about on a daily basis

#dr house #hilson #james wilson #james wilson x reader #gregory house #lisa cuddy #huddy #house md

[pomegranateshrimp]

hi!!! How are you? Could i request a James Wilson x reader were she’s at the hospital working with children (and we all know that james has a breeding kink) so like he sees her being caring with the children and gets turned on

Hi!! Tysm for being my first request, I’ve been a lil busy so this is coming out a little late I’m sorry 🩷🩷 I hope you like it!!!

A/N: (Sorry if this is too short!!) Do hospitals have play rooms for kids? They do now! Also do heads of pediatrics have time to play with kids? They do now!

CW: public sex, p in v, breeding (obviously), pet name baby

⚕️You’re going to make such a good mom.

James Wilson X Fem!Reader Smutshot

———————————————————

You were head of the pediatric wing and married to your beautiful, amazing, lovely husband, James Wilson. He would always stop by your office to give you gifts and small kisses. The job could get stressful at times, and he just wanted to make sure it never got to be too hard on you. You didn’t take it for granted either, returning every kiss he gave you and repaying him for the little gifts he got you after work. Today though, he couldn’t wait.

You were working with one of the children you had been treating for the past few days, nothing too bad fortunately, he was diagnosed with diabetes. Both of you lay down in the play room as the little boy made car noises with his mouth. “Zoom!” he hummed as a hot wheel jetted across the room. Wilson was looking for you to give you your usual afternoon kisses, and because he had a particularly hard case that he wanted to talk to you about. It was really weighing on him it seemed. When he couldn’t find you in your office, he assumed you would be in the play room with one of the patients. He hadn’t often found you here, and when he did he looked at you with such adoration, but this time he looked at you with something else as he peered through the glass door of the play room. Lust. James knew he wanted kids and he knew you were the one that he’d have them with. You were so good with them after all, and he knew that, but seeing you care for kids made him hard. He wanted that so badly. He wanted to see you make his kid laugh and smile with you; and he wanted it now.

You noticed your husband peering at you through the glass, and you gave the kid the toy car you were playing with and told him you’d be right back, along with the nurse who supervised the play room as well. You pushed open the door and stood across from James.

“Hey baby I—“

Your sentence was quickly cut off by a kiss planted on your mouth. But this kiss wasn’t like how it was any other day, this kiss was needy. Hungry. He didn’t want to wait for you to finish your sentence he just wanted to fill you with his seed right now. You were still in the hospital corridor and you pulled away.

“James, can you wait until we get home?” When the kiss was sloppier, messier, hungrier, you knew he wanted more, and you weren’t sure that you could give him that in the middle of the hospital. He wasn’t happy with you pulling away, he needed you right now. He took your hand and dragged you into a corner of the hospital no one went to. The thought of being caught was still in your mind, but at this point both you and james were turned on beyond belief. He always knew what to do to get you horny.

“No.” He hissed, and you weren’t used to him speaking to you like this, but fuck you could adjust. He titled your head to the side and started marking you up, planting deep kisses on your neck as his hands wandered on your waist, he sat down on a nearby chair and pulled you into his lap. With the case he was working on now, he needed a distraction, and you were just that. “You’re so good..” he moaned onto your neck, sending vibrations down your spine, earning him a small moan back from you.

“James…” your hands found themselves moving up into his hair. His hands found themselves moving down towards your panties. He looked up at you with glimmering eyes, “Can I?” He asked. Despite your previous worries you nodded eagerly at him and a small smirk appeared on his face as he tugged your underwear to the side. Quickly, he fumbled with the zipper of his jeans and pulled down the waistband to his boxers. His boner sprang to his stomach and he made haste in getting himself inside of you. That was his goal. You’re off the pill, you’re ovulating, and you’re ready to be pumped full of his hot, sticky, cum.

“I think we should have kids.” He says dominantly and you nod in agreement, not wasting any time. Even though you were okay with it, and he knew, he always made sure you were accepting before he did anything.

You moan out as he pushes himself inside of you, without much warning. He covers your mouth with his hand for only a second, reminding you where you both were. The thrusts that were usually so slow and soft and patient were now eager, fast, and yearning.

His cock stretched your cunt and you tightened around him, earning small grunts in return.

“You’re gonna look so fucking gorgeous when I cum inside of you.”

Even with his already fast pace it somehow quickened, earning more muffled moans from you and heavy breaths from him. He added his thumb to your clit, circling as he thrusted, wanting to make sure you were feeling just as good as he did. In the middle of the hospital, on his lunch break, he was going to make sure your walls were painted white with his cum.

“Fuck James, you feel so fucking good.”

You clenched on him and felt a familiar knot in your stomach tighten, and he knew you were close. You both were about to finish at the same time, his throbbing cock begging to cum inside of you already.

“I’m gonna—“

“Me too baby.”

Your back arches and your legs shake; you crash into James’ shoulder and after a few minutes of heavy breathing he pulls your soaked panties back up to you and plants a small kiss to your forehead. “You’re going to make such a good mom, I know it.”

You just had to hope your kids didn’t ask how it happened in the future.

#fanfic #house md #gregory house #james wilson #oneshot #hate crimes md #headcanon #dr wilson #smutshot #smut #breeding k1nk #pediatrics #james wilson x reader

[star-girl-05]

You're Hired

James Wilson x Reader

“So you hired Cameron because she's pretty, Forman because he has a record, and me because my dad put in a good word so why did you hire Y/n?” They were all curious. When they asked you about it you never gave them a straight answer. 

“Me and Y/n are lovers” The three of them stared at him for a moment trying to gauge whether or not he was joking. At their silence House added” She's the mother of my five children” the team rolled their eyes finally understanding he was teasing them. It only made them more curious, what was so secret about the reason he hired you. 

“Come on what's so secret about it?” Chase once again tried he was desperate to know. 

“Can we focus on the case, you know the one with the dying person!?!” Even with House's change in subject it didn’t do anything to get it off their minds. House was asking them questions and no one seemed to be using more than one brain cell each. “Will you focus” once again they don’t seem fully focused 

“Jesus, I’m married to Wilson, not that's the only reason but it's the only one you care about” you shout. While it is true you got the interview with House because of Wilson. An interview you didn’t even want but Wilson insisted.

When Wilson told house he wanted him to interview you, House knew right then and there that he was not going to hire you. However you managed to change his mind when the first words out of your mouth were ‘I don’t want this job, I’m only doing this so James would stop nagging’ and like a match made in heaven House hired you. 

“Wrong, I let you interview because of Wilson I hired you because you didn’t want the job and you're bitchy” You sent a glare his way. While the others were in shock, each talked over themselves to ask questions. You ignored them, focusing back on the case. 

“What do all these symptoms have in common?” House questioned and finally the three idiots answered using more than one brain cell this time. 

#james wilson #dr james wilson #james wilson fanfic #james wilson fanfiction #james wilson imagine #dr james wilson fanfic #dr james wilson fanfiction #dr james wilson imagine #james wilson x reader #dr james wilson x reader #house fandom #house imagine #house fanfic #house fanfiction #house md #house md fanfic #house md fanfiction #house md imagine

[the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf]

Tiny humans - Dr James Wilson x peds!reader

description: House gets to meet Wilson's new girlfriend for the first time when his case takes him into his worst nightmare...peds. House is in for a shock at the ball of sunshine who has his best friend on a string.

authors note: my first post for this series I want to do of oneshots and my first fanfic post on tumblr ever...enjoy!!! Btw i'm taking a lot of inspo from Arizona Robbins from Greys anatomy

Masterlist

REQUESTS OPEN FOR PEDS!READER - request here

House limped down the hallway followed by an exasperated Wilson who was concerned at his friends eager step, seeing as he was on his way to see a patient. How un-house-like.

"This is peds remember, these aren't normal patients. They don't lie, they don't have ulterior motives, they're just...kids." Wilson halted his friends shoulder and turned him towards his concerned face.

"So, wait until they've had a sip of beer before berating their existence?" House mockingly tilted his head in faux concern. Wilson's mouth opened but all that left was a sigh.

After confirming that his friend was no longer going to halt the inevitable, he continued on with a new fervour in his limp. But Wilson didn't stop there and sped to catch up with the surprising amount of ground his friend had covered.

"You see she loves these kids almost...almost like they're her own. She's smart and is excellent at what she does but she doesn't care about that." Wilson paused and looked back into his mind, picturing the moment he first saw her in a child's room, a plastic tiara on her head and an empty teacup perfectly clasped between her fingers.

"She cares about the kids."

"Wow. I'm touched." House grasps his chest and wipes away a non-existant tear. "Do you know how easy being a paediatrician is. They can't lie until they grow teeth and after that they're stupid enough to reveal to us when their parents lie. There's a reason it's 'daddy touches my special place' and not 'daddy gets aroused by children.'"

"That's it I'm making the rule. No pedaphile jokes."

"But the jokes literally in the name...peds"

"Who lets you around children?"

"Who lets me around people? Haha, I got you there!" He jabs a finger into Wilson's chest. Wilson rolls his eyes and holds out his arm to prevent his morose friend entering the land of happiness. Well as happy as a bunch of sick kids can be.

"Well let me appeal to your true nature." Wilson sighs. "I like this girl and she likes me. Please don't ruin it?"

"How could I say no to those puppy dog eyes. Fine! But only in the name of your libido, at least until I finish my soul-searching and realise my true calling is your bed."

Whilst House finishes his thought, they are spotted by a woman in pink scrubs, absent of any colour of coat. She briskly walks towards the two.

"Dr Wilson, Dr House. My name is..."

"I don't remember nurses names, it's nothing personal, I rarely remember anyones."

Wilson coughs and shoves his friends shoulder to direct him towards your burning gaze.

"As I was saying, my name is DOCTOR y/l/n. Pleasure to meet you."

Despite the gaze, her smile remains cheerful and she extends her hand for House to shake. Reluctantly, he eventually offers it and it is taken in a firm and bouncy handshake.

"James has told me so much about you, to be honest I'm surprised our paths have not crossed sooner. Regardless, today I am so happy to welcome you both to peds. The most magical place on earth."

Whilst listening to her, House took stock of the woman in front of him. Her pink scrubs seemed to be the dullest thing about her. Her hair was collected in a ponytail that swished its way down between her shoulder blades. Her pockets were lined with memories of her past. A pink glitter pen given to her from a girl who was continually brought in for asthma, a ball of yarn from a boy who had loved knitting, a yellow sticker saying great job, a blue glitter one saying 'you go girl'. There was a pencil with a yellow smiley face rubber and another that seemed to contain many colours. I guess that just made it all the more fun. House smirked when he saw a pocket protector. Not too dissimilar to the one that lined the pocket of the smitten brunette next to him.

"Gentlemen, this is peds. This is the place of the tiny humans. They like glitter, they play games, they see us as magicians. They believe we are the magical healers who can cure them. So that's how we present ourselves to them. The tiny humans may be tiny but they are strong. Stronger than most. Their bodies fight because they know they have so much life left to live and we try our hardest to give them as much life left as we possibly can."

As the girl speaks, absolutely in awe of her job and the lives it saves. She fails to notice the adoring gaze of the one she calls hers. The brunette looks to her as if she hung the stars and the moon and even though he could hear House's eyes rolling into the back of his skull, he couldn't bring himself to look or care. Not when she was in his line of sight.

"So you will not be stubborn, you will not be blunt or sarcastic. As far as I'm concerned, today you are the two newest editions to the circus. So play the part and follow my lead."

She picks up her files which were each coordinated by colour and glitter. House smirked at this. She turns to push open the door to the unit but falters.

"Also..."

She turns back to face the two men.

"The owners of the tiny humans can be quite volatile. You've been warned. Enjoy!" Her look of warning is quickly replaced by a mask of pure joy.

House softly giggles.

"I like her. Will we soon be hearing the pitter patter of tiny 'Wilson' humans?"

Wilson didn’t even hear his friends comment and instead chose to follow his beauty, like a moth to a flame.

House shrugs.

"Men, never thinking with the right head." As he eyes the glitter residue that adorns Wilson’s sleeve.

#james wilson x reader #dr james wilson x reader #house md #house x reader #james wilson #dr james wilson #dr house #dr house x reader #james wilson x peds!reader #dr james wilson x peds!reader

[kining-the-evil]

just some ideas but maybe breeding, uniform, dumbification or sex pollen for james wilson? feel free to use just a few if you’d like!

I want to do either Breeding or Uniform, so I added a poll to make the decision.

#house md #house md x reader #james wilson #dr james wilson x reader #james wilson x reader #james wilson imagine #kinktober 2023 #kinktober

[shmaptainwrites]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐀 [𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐒𝐎𝐍]

PAIRINGS — James Wilson x ex-wife!Reader

SUMMARY — James and Reader have not been on great terms since their divorce, but an emerging situation with their son forces them to put aside their differences and work together and hope that past feelings don't resurface

WARNINGS — hospitalization, chronic illness, swearing, complicated feelings (idk y'all they're divorced what more can I say)

NOTE — Okay so I have so many things to say about this fic, but if I say them all this post will be way too long it already is like this came up as 33 pages in my docs but this is a day late birthday present for @shots-of-wilson-and-whiskey who also provided the James pic I hope you had such a fun day and a great year of simping ahead!

Pronounciation — Mahlet = Ma-h-let | Hennock = Hey-knock

Ever since you had become a mother, birthday parties were the bane of your existence. The sugar overload, the loud noises, the cleanup afterwards, all amounted to your own personal hell. Yet, you would move hell or high water for your son to have the most enjoyable party every single year. 

Today was no different, eight years later you were still breaking your back to ensure every small detail was perfect, from the pin the spikes on the stegosaurus to the cake you’d spent at least a month painstakingly training to make. 

A friend of yours, another parent from the school your son Julian went to, came over in the kitchen to give you a hand with some of the snacks. 

“How are you managing here?” she asked and you took a deep breath. 

“Managing is the operative word,” you chuckled. “Kids having fun out there?” 

“Yeah, loads, you’ve outdone yourself again,” she assured you. “Will James be making an appearance?” 

“I stopped asking myself that question after we got divorced,” you said while fixing the plate of vegetables and dip. “He’s supposed to, he promised Julian, but we all know how that ends.” 

There seemed to be a bit of commotion out in the backyard and you tried to assess what was happening from the window, but your suspicions that something was off was confirmed when Julian’s best friend, Hennock, came rushing inside.

“Mrs. Wilson, something’s going on with Julian,” he said and you frowned while your friend followed you outside to see the kids circling around Julian who seemed to be gripping onto his chest. 

“Jay, what’s going on? Are you okay?” you bent down to be closer to his eye-level, trying to understand what was happening to your son. 

“Can’t…” he pointed to his mouth. “Can’t…breathe,” he wheezed. 

Your eyes went wide, but before you could grab him and run for the car he began to cough and you hoped and prayed there was just something caught in his throat that would make its way out, but with the coughing came spatters of red all over your white shirt.

“Mahi,” you looked over at your friend quickly while picking Julian up. You didn’t have to say a word, she already knew what she needed to do. 

Living close to the hospital, it was worth it to drive yourself, that way you didn’t have to wait for an ambulance to get to you. You had made the mental calculations many times before, just in case there was an emergency and now it was finally coming in handy. 

When you got Julian in the car, you checked in on his breathing, it was still laboured, but at least at this point he was getting in the air, even if he was coughing up blood. 

You turned on the car and began driving while calling your ex-husband with one hand. The line rang until you reached voicemail so you called again, expecting at least this time for him to pick up, only to hear the tone once more. 

“Dammit James!” you threw your phone down on the seat next to you knowing you’d deal with him later, now you needed to focus on getting to the hospital without killing either of you. 

Barely paying attention to how your car was parked, you grabbed Julian out of the back seat and ran into the ER with him. 

“Ma’am, what’s going on?” a nurse came and asked you as you put Julian down. 

“My son, he-he’s having trouble breathing and he’s coughing up blood I-I-I don’t know what’s happening.” 

Before you could say a word they had whisked Julian away and another nurse came to ask you some questions about his medical history and any information that may be important to the doctors treating him. 

“Where’s my son?” you asked, “I want to see my son.” 

“Ma’am I’m sorry, but the doctors are working on getting his airway cleared, you can’t be with him right now.” 

You pressed your lips into a thin line and bit back your tongue. There were a million and one things you wanted to say to the nurse, but none of them would help your situation. On the other hand, finding your ex might. 

So instead of finding the waiting room you went over to the elevator and made your way up to the oncology department, briskly walking through the halls until you reached his office. At this point, you didn’t bother knocking, opening the door to see him sitting down over a file and talking with House. 

“Hey Greg,” you said in a fake cheery voice. “Mind giving us the room?” 

“Oh, this is the wife with the kid, did you forget to pay child support?” House asked James. 

“Get out, Greg,” you said warningly and he listened, instead opting to steal the rest of James’ sandwich and slipping past you, while wishing James good luck and letting you slam the door shut behind you. 

“What’s going on?” James asked, clearly confused by your demeanour and appearance. “If this is about the party I didn’t forget I was-wait is that blood,” he stood up from his chair and came over to you. 

“What’s going on is you didn’t pick up your fucking phone,” you said angrily. 

“Hey,” James looked at you sternly. “What is going on?” he repeated his question, this time more pointedly. 

You could feel your lips begin to tremble and your vision became blurred while you shook your head. 

“Who’s blood is on your shirt?” 

You chewed on the inside of your cheek, “It’s Julian’s.” 

“Julian-I-what happened?” his demeanour changed from frustrated with your attitude towards him to worrying for his son. 

“I-I don’t know he said he couldn’t breathe and then he started coughing up blood and I just picked him up and drove him here a-and now they won’t let me see him.” 

“You drove him?” he asked incredulously. “You didn’t think to maybe call an ambulance?” 

“That’s what you’re hung up on? That I decided to drive because it was faster than getting him an ambulance?” 

“That’s not what I-,” 

“Yes it is,” you stepped back. “I wouldn’t have needed an ambulance if you were there.” 

James sighed and chose to ignore your comment, 

“Where is he?” he asked. 

“Emergency room,” you muttered. “They won’t let me see him, you need to talk to them, say something, anything.” 

James nodded his head, at least you could agree on that. He walked with you out of the office and to the elevator so you could go to the ER together and figure out what the hell was happening to your son. 

When you got down there and James began speaking to the nurses, they informed him that Julian had been moved to the ICU and his respiration was being closely monitored while they ran a few tests to see what had caused the arrest. 

You had to fight to hold yourself upright when they pulled back the curtain and you could see Julian hooked up to all the machines and with a ventilator tube stuck down his throat. You covered your mouth with your hand and shook your head again. This couldn’t be happening, now you were supposed to be cutting into cake and opening presents, not sitting in the ICU. 

You stepped inside with James and he closed the curtain to give you a bit of privacy and decided to look over his chart and see if they had given any relevant information there. Seeing none, he turned his attention over to you, seeing your eyes filled with tears, unable to tear your gaze away from your son. 

James walked over to you and cautiously put a hand on your shoulder, eventually encouraging you to turn around so he could pull you into his arms. You allowed your tears to soak his white coat, gripping onto him so tightly because there was nowhere else to hold. 

You could hear his breathing change, accompanied by the small sniffles and you knew he was doing just as bad as you were right now, wiping the tears from his own eyes as he finally allowed himself to see his son as he was, sick, helpless, vulnerable, and only moments ago, without his dad’s help when he needed him most. 

Your moment was interrupted when you heard the curtain being pulled back and you saw two doctors standing there. You pulled away from James and wiped whatever remaining tears were in your eyes so you could properly address them.

It seemed as though one of the doctors recognized James and when he looked down at the file and saw the name he made the connection internally. 

“Can we talk to you guys out in the waiting room for a moment?” he asked. 

“I don’t want to leave my son,” you shook your head. 

“Ma’am, this is the ICU and the visiting hours are very strictly adhered to, I think your husband maybe got lucky and pulled a few strings so you could see your son, but we need to leave now.” 

“He’s not my husband,” you muttered and reluctantly followed them out of the makeshift room and towards the waiting area. 

“Did you find out what was wrong?” James asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “I looked at his chart. You took him for an emergency CT and bloodwork.” 

“We also ran a few other tests,” the doctor began explaining. “From the medical history your, um, ex wife gave I had a suspicion of something so we ran a sweat test to check for elevated chloride levels and it just came back positive.” 

“Chloride levels?” you looked up at James. “What does that mean?” 

James sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “It means Julian has cystic fibrosis.” 

“I-I’ve heard of that, is it curable?” you asked. 

“I’ll leave you guys with Dr. Liu, he deals with the pediatric cystic fibrosis cases and will be able to answer your questions better than I can,” he wished you a good day and left you alone with the other doctor. 

“Cystic fibrosis is manageable-,” 

“So you can’t cure it,” you reiterated. 

The doctor shook his head, “Unfortunately there is no cure for CF yet, but many people have been able to live longer and happy lives with the medical technology now available.” 

James was silent, taking in all the information that was being presented. 

“How did he get it? Is it contagious or-or was it just always there?” you asked. 

“It’s a genetic condition, so he’s always had it, the symptoms have just gotten to the point where they’re now visible,” the doctor explained.

“I-It’s genetic so one of us is a carrier?” you pointed to you and James. 

“We both are,” James said. “Both parents have to be carriers to pass it down to their child, right?” 

Dr. Liu nodded and you pressed your lips together. 

“C-Can you just tell us what this means for right now?” you asked. “I just think-I think I need a minute.” 

Dr. Liu nodded his head and explained they were giving Julian medication to help with the infection and airway damage that caused him to cough up blood, then they would get him on some bronchodilators to help with his breathing for the time being while they assessed what other issues the cystic fibrosis had potentially caused in his body. He’d have to stay at the hospital for a while, but hopefully could be moved to the pediatric ward within the next day or so.

“We can talk more about what Julian’s medical journey will look like later, I’ll give you guys some time together and if you have any questions, Wilson’s got my pager and knows where my office is.” 

You nodded your head and thanked him quietly as he left the waiting area. You finally sat down on one of the chairs. 

James took the seat next to you and you covered your face with your hands. 

“We couldn’t give him a functional family and a happy home and now we’ve given him a chronic medical condition to top it off.” 

“Blaming ourselves isn’t going to do anything for Julian,” James said. 

“And sitting around here is?” you asked and James sighed. 

“No, no it’s not.” 

You sat there in silence for a little while longer before you noticed James stand up and motion for you to follow him. As much as you didn’t want to listen to him and just sit and wait until they would let you be with Julian again, you got up and followed him to one of the OR supply closets. He used a key to unlock the door and sifted through some materials until he found what he was looking for, pulling out a scrub shirt in your size and handing it over to you. 

You looked down at your own shirt, seeing the red specks of Julian’s blood and closed the door behind your both, pulling your shirt off over your head and handing it to James. You were about to put the other shirt on when you noticed the flecks of dried blood against your chest. 

While you eyes were transfixed on that, James had grabbed an alcohol wipe package from the shelves and tore it open with his teeth, removing the wipe and reaching over to help you clean the blood off yourself. 

“James, I can do it myself,” you reached for the wipe, but he pulled it away. 

“You’ve got some on your neck too, just let me take care of it,” he insisted. 

You knew better than to cause a fight over something trivial like this right now so you put your hands down, watching as James tossed your shirt over his shoulder and carefully began wiping away the specks of your son’s blood off your chest, collarbone, and neck. 

“Have you eaten today?” he asked you while holding your face to tilt it to the side so he could get a spot he’d missed earlier. 

“No, why?” 

“Because it’s his birthday, you’d always forget to eat until dinner and even then it would be scraps from the party until I forced you to eat something better,” he recounted. “Let’s just go grab something from the cafeteria before we go back to the ICU, okay?” 

“Will it make a difference if I say I’m not hungry?” you asked. 

“You can’t take care of Julian if you’re not taking care of yourself.” 

You scoffed and pulled the shirt over your head, “And you’ve suddenly become an expert on taking care of your family?” 

“Believe it or not, we were once happy and there was a reason we got married and decided to have a child together.” 

“And there’s a reason we got divorced too,” you added and opened the door behind you.

You didn’t go to the cafeteria, instead heading back to the ICU waiting room knowing either visiting hours would have to start eventually or they’d move Julian to his own room and you could finally sit with him. 

James clearly hadn’t followed you so you ended up alone again, wringing your hands and waiting for some sort of news. 

Eventually, you felt a bag drop on your lap and you looked up and saw James standing overtop of you. You looked inside and saw a package of a sandwich, a small bag of chips, and a water bottle. 

You knew he was right, that if you didn’t take care of yourself you wouldn’t be able to take care of Julian, so you forced yourself to eat, even if you didn’t want to. 

A little while later, Dr. Liu had returned and informed you that they were moving Julian to the pediatric ward and you could stay with him there in his room. When you joined him there, James had taken off his white coat and tossed it on one of the chairs, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt and sitting down next to Julian’ taking one of his hands in his own. 

“Don’t you have patients you need to see?” you asked, sitting on the opposite side of the hospital bed. 

“I told Cuddy I needed the day, someone else is taking care of it for me,” he said, not removing his gaze from Julian. 

With the two of them sitting next to each other like that, you could clearly see the similarities Julian had with his father. They shared the same eyes and nose, and when they smiled they had the same little creases around their eyes. 

You wished that’s what you could have been looking at, them smiling together, instead of the frown etched onto James’ face and Julian still fast asleep while an oxygen mask now delivered the air he needed to help him breathe. 

“Do you know much about cystic fibrosis?” you asked James, brushing your thumb against Julian’s other hand. 

“Only that it mainly affects the digestive system and the respiratory tract,” he explained. “I’m not too familiar with how it's managed, just that there’s regular doctor’s visits and probably some medication and therapies involved.” 

You could feel a small stirring and you looked down and saw Julian’s hand begin to move underneath yours. 

You smiled when you saw his eyes blink open and James was quick to stand up and come closer to him so he had a familiar face to look at while he took in his surroundings. 

“Hey buddy,” James smiled and you could see Julian light up at the sight of his dad. He lifted his hand to try to remove the oxygen mask, but James gently encouraged him not to. “This is giving your lungs an extra hand right now, let’s just keep it on until the doctor tells us it's okay to take it off.” 

“But you’re a doctor,” Julian countered and James chuckled. 

“I am, but I'm not your doctor. I am, however, your dad so you have to listen to me anyways,” he teased and bent down to kiss his son’s cheek and tickle him a little bit in the process. 

“Hey, go easy on him,” you placed a gentle hand on James' arm and he laid off. 

“You know,” James said. “It’s still your birthday.” 

“It is?” Julian asked and you both nodded and James reached down to grab something he’d brought with him. 

“All the presents your friends got you are at home waiting for you to get better so you can open them, but this is what I got for you,” he said. “I was gonna come and bring it to the party, but I think you brought the party to me.” 

Julian laughed a little at that and you rolled your eyes, of course James could make himself look good by not showing up. 

He sat up with the help of his dad and pulled out the tissue paper from the bag to see the present that was hiding underneath. With a big grin on his face, he took out a dinosaur stuffed animal along with a book all about the different species of the Cretaceous period. 

“This is awesome,” Julian grinned. “Thanks dad, I love it.” 

James gave Julian another kiss and you joined them, taking a seat on the bed and glancing over at the book on Julian’s lap. 

“How are you feeling sweetheart?” you asked, fixing the twisted band of the oxygen mask on his face. 

“My throat hurts a little bit,” he admitted. “And I’m kinda hungry.” 

“Let me call a nurse and we’ll see what you can eat,” you said and pressed the button to send someone over from the nurses’ station. 

Meanwhile, James poured Julian a glass of water and helped him take a few sips of it. His throat was probably irritated from being on the ventilator, but his lungs had become stabilized from the use of the bronchodilators. 

The nurse came and you spoke to her about getting Julian something to eat and she said she’d double check with Dr. Liu and then grab him some food. 

“Hey, Jay,” you walked over to the bed and took your son’s hand in yours. “Are you okay to hang out here with dad while I go grab some stuff from home? The doctors said we might hang around here for a few days so I think I need to pack a bag.” 

“Yeah, that’s okay,” Julian nodded. “Are you okay mom?” he reached up and touched your cheek and you realized you'd let a few more tears slip.

“Yeah, I’m just really happy you’re okay,” you wiped the tears away and pressed a big kiss to his cheek. “Right, Jamie? We’re both happy he’s okay.” 

James looked over at you with softness reflecting in his eyes at the sound of the nickname he hadn’t heard in a long time and nodded his head. 

“Bring some cake back with you,” Julian whispered. “Even if dad and the doctor say no we can sneak some.” 

You laughed at his plan and gave him another kiss, assuring him you’d pack some in a container to bring for him when you came back.

When you arrived at your home, you thought you might cry at the sight in front of you. The kitchen and living room were completely clean, presents piled neatly on the coffee table along with a new card you didn’t recognize. Coming closer, you noticed the bright marker, signature of eight-year-olds across the country, with the message Get Well Soon Julian! written on it and signed by all his friends who had attended the party. 

You packed the card in your bag along with a few other things and made a mental note to grab a nice thank you gift for Mahlet to thank her for what she had done. 

As promised, you cut a big chunk of cake, enough for the three of you to share, and packed it in a tupperware to bring back to the hospital. 

You grabbed a few changes of clothes for both you and Julian and changed out of the temporary shirt you had on and into something more comfortable for the rest of the evening, making sure everything you needed was in place before heading out and going back to the hospital. 

When you got back to Julian’s room you saw James squished in next to him on the bed, the book he had bought him opened on his lap as he read its contents to Julian. Julian was resting his head against James’ arm and James was doing those big exaggerations he always would whenever he’d read bedtime stories to Julian, emphasizing all the insane details and changing the inflections of his voice in just the right way to make him laugh. 

“I brought cake,” you grinned, holding up the container as you entered the room, holding three plastic forks. “If Dr. Dad says it's okay, we can eat it.” 

“Dr. Dad desperately needs some sugar,” James nodded his head and closed the book for the time being while you took a seat by Julian’s legs and opened the container, handing each of the boys a fork. 

You helped Julian take off his oxygen mask for the time being and placed it off to the side, acutely aware of how his breathing sounded more laboured without it. 

James only snuck in a couple bites of the cake before taking the mask from your side and holding it ready in case Julian needed a bit of an extra hand. 

Just as he had predicted, after a few bites of cake Julian was noticing a bit of a difficulty to get air into his lungs and James held up the mask to his face, allowing him to take a couple deep breaths. 

“What do you think of the cake, Jay?” you asked. 

“Really good, just like everytime you make it,” he grinned. 

“I’m sorry you didn’t have a great birthday, buddy,” James apologized. “I mean with all your friends and classmates.” 

“What do you mean?” Julian asked. “I think I had a good birthday.” 

“You do?” you frowned curiously, wondering what kind of light he’d seen in the day that you and James as worried parents had somehow missed. “What made it good?”

“We’re sitting eating cake. Together. Just like when I was little,” he said simply and you chewed on the inside of your cheek, looking over at James whose gaze hadn’t left Julian. He almost looked disappointed, at what, you couldn’t place, but at least for the moment Julian was happy and that was all either of you really wanted. 

—

You grabbed your purse from the ground and thanked Dr. Liu for all of the information he had given you and assured you’d be there with Julian at the allocated follow-up time you had arranged. You were just about to leave when James came rushing into the room, apologies spewing out of his mouth for being late. 

“Late? You missed the whole appointment.”

“I-I did?” he said, looking down at his watch and cursing when he saw the time. 

“Jay, sweetheart, why don’t you sit down here,” you moved out of Dr. Liu’s office and set him up on a chair in one of the general waiting areas and handed him his dinosaur book from your purse. “I just need to go have a chat with your dad real quick.” 

Julian nodded and opened up the book, flipping through the pages while you grabbed James’ arm and pulled him into a dead-end hallway so you could speak in private. 

“What the hell took you so long?” you asked firmly. “We waited for twenty minutes before even starting the appointment!” 

“I’m sorry,” James apologized, “I was in the OR with a patient and something went haywire and it took longer than expected to fix it.” 

“Still, you couldn’t have told someone to at least pass on a message?” 

“I was in the middle of saving a patient’s life! What did you want me to do?” 

“I wanted you to be there for your son,” you whispered harshly. “You make promises you can’t keep and I have to watch him get disappointed over and over again. He does not deserve that, especially now.” 

James placed his hands on his hips and said, 

“I am trying to be there, it’s not for lack of effort-,” 

“Well try harder!” you threw your hands up in the air. “You’re an ex-husband James, not an ex-father. You don’t have to show up for me anymore, but you damn well better show up for him.” 

When he said nothing you continued. 

“Believe it or not, you don’t have to work as much as you do James. You chose to do that and right now that’s coming at your son’s expense and he is scared and vulnerable and neither of us know half of what Dr. Liu is talking to us about. Do you know what he said to me when I was confused about the management plan? He said Dad would know what this means. Dad can help us. And he’s right, you would have known and you can help so stop acting like your fucking schedule controls you and get your schedule under control.” 

James was quiet for a moment before he nodded his head, 

“Okay,” he said simply. 

You knew better than to get your hopes up with him and you didn’t have any more energy to argue, so you told him you could talk more later, but right now you were going to take Julian home so he could rest in his own bed and finally open his birthday presents. 

“Is dad coming with us?” Julian asked when you picked him up and began walking away to leave the hospital. 

“No, not this time,” you shook your head. 

“Did you fight with him again?” Julian asked and you pressed your lips together. 

“We just had a disagreement,” you settled on. “You can call him later when he’s done work if you want to talk to him, sounds good?” 

Julian was content with your answer and left it at that. 

Over the next few days, aside from Julian’s call, you didn’t hear much for James and you assumed things were right on track to going back to the way they had always been. You loved your son to pieces, but this was one time you wished his dad would be here to support, working and caring for Julian on top of trying to figure out how to be his at home doctor was already taking its toll and you didn’t know how you’d be able to keep it up. 

One night, you were sitting in the living room reading a book Dr. Liu had recommended. It was detailing strategies for parents with children who had cystic fibrosis. In the middle of your chapter you were interrupted by a knock to your door and you put in your bookmark, wondering who was stopping by this far into the evening. 

Unlocking the door and opening it, you found it hard to hide the surprise in your face when you saw James on the other end. 

“James?” you tilted your head. “I haven’t heard from you at all this week, what’s going on?” 

“I reduced my patient load,” he said, “and I talked to Cuddy about reducing my clinic hours. I still have to do some administrative stuff for the department, but it can be done from home for the most part.” 

“Oh,” you were surprised to say the least. You didn’t realize your outburst the other day had worked. 

“You were right,” he said. “I need to be here for Julian and I can’t do that if my work always comes first.” 

You nodded your head, following along with what he was saying. 

“C-Can I come in and see him?” James asked. “I know our custody agreement has always been all over the place-,” 

You didn’t say anything, simply opening the door wider for him to come inside. 

“He’s asleep in his room,” you said. “When you’re done we can talk some more.” 

James nodded and stepped inside, slipping off his shoes and taking off his jacket, making his way to Julian’s room to sit with him for a moment before joining you in the kitchen. 

“Want something to drink?” you asked and he said some water would be nice. You poured him a glass while waiting for the water to boil for your tea. 

“I saw the book you were reading over there,” he pointed to the couch. “Dr. Liu recommended it to me too, I just finished it the other night.” 

“Show off,” you rolled your eyes and handed him the glass. 

“What I was trying to say is I think something that stood out to me is having consistency and a routine is good, especially when things are new,” James explained. “I don’t think it makes sense for him to be moving back and forth from here to my place.” 

“So you think we should have a home base here?” you confirmed and he nodded. 

“I can come by more often, if there’s days where you need to be at work I can be doing the administrative stuff here after school and take care of Julian until you get back.” 

You pursed your lips and as you heard the kettle click, moved to pour your hot water into the mug you were holding. 

“These are all good ideas,” you started. 

“I’m assuming there’s a but coming?” 

“But I don’t want to give Julian the wrong impression is all.” 

James shook his head. 

“You really need to pick whatever it is you want,” James crossed his arms over his chest. “First I’m not here enough, I don’t put my family first. Now I’m putting my family first and you’re worried Julian’s going to think this means we’re getting back together.” 

“He doesn’t need to get his hopes up for something that’s never going to happen,” you said flatly. 

“Have you ever considered having a conversation with him instead of shielding him from every little thing that might hurt him?” James asked and you rolled your eyes. 

“Clearly every little thing can hurt him!” you pointed over to his room. “He can’t even breathe without help, James. Maybe he needs to be protected.” 

“Stop, just stop,” James ran a hand over his face. “I can’t get into a fight with you every single time we see each other. Julian is just as much my son as he is yours, if this is going to work we need to be able to have a conversation with each other.” 

You took a sip of your tea and said,

“Okay, I’m worried Julian might take the fact that you’re around more the wrong way.” 

James nodded his head, “I hear you, so maybe we should talk to him about it and say I’m coming around more to lend a hand around the house and help take care of him.” 

“Dad? What are you doing here?” as if on cue, Julian had walked into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes awake and adjusting to the light. 

“Julian, where’s your oxygen mask?” 

“I don’t wanna wear it mom,” he whined. “I don’t like the way it feels on my face.” 

You sighed, having had this conversation at least five times before, you didn’t know what else you could say to convince him. 

“Hey buddy, maybe we should listen to mom on this one,” James suggested. “You know that feeling you’ve got right here,” he pointed to his chest. “That’s only gonna get worse if you don’t wear it and we don’t want to have to go to the hospital again, right?” 

Julian shook his head and sighed, stomping back over to his room to grab the portable machine and place the tube under his nose and around his ears, allowing him to get the right amount of oxygen. 

You looked over at James gratefully and he reached his hand out to yours and gave it a squeeze. It was nice being on the same team even if you had just been arguing. 

When Julian came back he repeated his question to his dad who explained that he was here to talk to you about a few things that would be changing soon and that he’d be around more to help look after him. 

“If you’re going to be here to help look after me can you stay tonight?” Julian asked. “Mom still has some of your clothes in those boxes in her closet.” 

“She does, does she,” James looked over at you. 

“It was the stuff you wanted to give away and I never got around to it,” you said. “There’s probably a hoodie and some pyjama pants in there if you want to stay.” 

James pressed his lips together and sighed, 

“You know buddy as much as I would love to have a sleepover with you I don’t think it’s a good idea if I spend the night here,” James said. “But I can tuck you in again and wait until you fall asleep to go back home.” 

“Mom, can you come too?” Julian asked and you nodded your head. 

James stood up and helped Julian carry his portable oxygen machine back to his bedroom and you trailed behind them, watching as James carefully tucked Julian back under the covers while peppering his face with small kisses, like he would do when Julian was younger and just learning to sleep in his own room. 

“Dad that tickles,” Julian giggled and James simply smiled and continued littering his face with kisses. 

“Too bad. I love you too much; I just can’t get enough of you.” 

“Alright, move it,” you nudged James from the opposite side of the bed and took your turn. “It must tickle having two parents who love you so damn much.” 

“It does,” Julian’s laughter died out as you both finally left him alone, sitting on either side of his mattress. 

You both wished him a good night and waited as he slowly fell back asleep. When his breathing was steady and his grip loosened on yours and James’ hands you took it as your cue to leave the room. 

James placed a hand on your shoulder as you stepped out of the room, prompting you to turn around and face him. 

“I’ll come by tomorrow and we can work out a schedule or something, does that sound good?”

You nodded your head, 

“Yeah, I have a work thing tomorrow in the evening, I was gonna ask Mahlet, Hennock’s mom, if she could come look after Julian, but if you’re around…” 

“I’ll come for dinner and then do the bedtime routine,” he said and you smiled. 

“James I’m begging you-,” 

“I won’t be late,” he assured. “No surgeries planned and I’m ending my shift with clinic duty.” 

You pressed your lips into a thin line and nodded your head. 

“I’ll see you then,” you patted his arm and he showed himself out. 

You walked back to the kitchen grabbing your now lukewarm cup of tea and sitting back on the couch picking up your book and opening it, reading until you couldn’t keep your eyes open any longer, falling asleep right there on the couch. 

—

Over the next few months, you, James, and Julian had developed some sort of routine around school, work, and doctor’s appointments. A part of you thought you were spending more time together as a family than when you were married. 

Today you had to go in for work, also having reduced your hours, but in a way that you were working in tandem with James. When you arrived back home the house smelled like warm spices and big plates of home-cooked food. 

You dropped your keys on the entryway table, next to James’ keys and wallet and took off your jacket, hanging it up before coming to the kitchen and seeing Julian and Hennock doing their homework at the island. 

“Mr. Wilson, what is the difference between these two words?” Hennock asked, holding up his paper so James could see while cutting some vegetables for a salad. 

“I think the first one is the kind of principal in your school that looks after all the students and the other one is… man, that’s hard to describe. Hey, how do you describe what principle is to an eight-year-old?” James asked you. 

“I think that kind of principle is something that guides the way people behave or act,” you sat next to Julian and Hennock. “Like a principle is the foundation for something that people believe in.” 

Hennock and Julian still looked a little confused by your explanation so you tried to give an example. 

“So a principle could be to be kind to everyone we meet and so people who believe in that principle will try to follow it.” 

That put it in better terms for them to understand and there was a chorus of oh’s before they looked back down at their papers and scribbled down a few things to answer the questions they were asked. 

“They learning about homonyms?” you asked James and he nodded.

“I talked to Mahlet,” James said, changing the topic. “Hennock’s gonna stay for dinner and she’ll come pick him up around seven.” 

“Sounds good, it’s always nice to have you, Henny,” you smiled and ruffled your hand through his coarse curly hair in an endearing way. 

“Thanks, Mrs. Wilson,” Hennock smiled. 

James was now over the stove, stirring what looked like a soup before giving it a taste and figuring something might be missing.

“Can you taste this?” James asked. “I don’t know why, but every time I make it there’s something off.” 

You took a spoon and tried a little bit of the broth, looking down to see that he was making matzah ball soup and immediately when you tasted it you knew what was missing. 

“I know what it is,” you said. “But you can’t tell your mom I told you. She swore me to secrecy.” 

“My mother told you this?” James asked and you nodded. 

“When we were getting married she wanted me to know how to make it the way she would for you when you were sick.” 

“And she didn’t think to tell her own son how to do this?” he seemed thoroughly offended, but all you could do was laugh. 

“It’s tarragon. I don’t think it’s something everyone adds, it was just something special she’d put in hers to make it a little different. Here,” you reached into the spice cupboard and took out a jar of dried tarragon and took a bit of the herb out of the container and crushed it in your hands before sprinkling it into the soup. James mixed it in and gave the broth a minute to soak in the flavour before trying it again and shaking his head. 

“I can’t believe she didn’t tell me!” 

“I’ll let you finish having your little meltdown,” you patted his back. “I’m gonna hop in the shower quickly and we can eat when I get out.” 

“Did Dad forget the tarragon?” Julian asked and you nodded your head. 

“Wow, so everyone knew, but me?” James asked and you nodded your head with a shrug. 

“Sorry, I guess your mom has favourites, or something.” 

“Figures,” James teasingly rolled his eyes and you chuckled, waving him off and going to take a shower and change into something a little more comfortable. 

When you came back outside they had migrated to the dining room table, each with a bowl of soup in front of them and a plate of salad. You sat on the same side as James since Julian and Hennock were already sitting next to each other and the boys happily recounted the details of their school day and playdate with you while everyone ate their soup and salad. 

“What did you do at work, Dad?” James asked. 

“Oh, nothing interesting,” he shook his head. “I think your mom was doing bigger things than me.” 

“Bigger than treating people with cancer? You flatter me,” you drank some of your soup’s broth. “I had a meeting with a big company about a building they’re making.” 

“Did you go do a site visit?” James asked and you nodded. 

“Engineers are being a pain in the butt, keep making me adjust the design, but we’ll see who gets the last laugh.” 

“Mom always does,” Julian told Hennock and they chuckled along with James. 

After dinner James helped you clear up some of the dishes before heading out and leaving you with the boys. When Mahlet came by to pick Hennock up you invited her in for tea and a little visit. 

“Thanks for coming to stay with Julian the other night,” you said after handing her a mug. “For once, I was the late one and James had an emergency come up so it was a huge help.” 

“And how are things now, with the co-parenting?” 

You took a sip of your tea, “Weirdly good,” you admitted. “We don’t argue as much which is nice and Julian gets to see his dad more.” 

“Do you think maybe you’re not fighting because he’s changing?” she asked. 

“I don’t wanna go down that path,” you shook your head. “If Jay hadn’t been diagnosed things would still be the same as they always were.” 

“But they’re not. More often than not people show their true colours during times of difficulty.” 

You took a deep breath and sighed, “If that was the case I would have seen something worth keeping when my marriage was falling apart.” 

Mahlet nodded, seeing as you had a point and your conversation was halted as they boys came out of Julian’s room. 

Mahlet and Hennock left shortly afterwards and you quickly got Julian ready for bed, tucking him in and then going to get settled yourself. You looked through a few client papers for work before calling it a night and turning off your bedside lamp, curling into bed and falling asleep. 

Your sleep was interrupted in the middle of the night by a tapping on your shoulder and when you blinked your eyes open you saw Julian standing next to your bed. 

“Jay, sweetheart, is something wrong?” you asked. 

“My stomach really hurts,” he told you and you sat up, motioning for him to come sit with you on the bed. 

“Where?” you asked, turning on the light and he pointed to the upper right corner of his abdomen. If you remembered correctly that wasn’t exactly where his stomach was and your suspicions were confirmed when you saw the yellowing whites of his eyes. “Oh, sweetheart, I think we have to go to the hospital.” 

“The hospital? What happened?” Julian looked worried and you assured him everything would be alright. 

“We’re just being safe,” you told him. “I’m gonna call your dad, maybe he can tell us a little bit more of what’s going on. Do you feel good enough to get your jacket and shoes and your hospital bag?” 

Julian nodded his head and you gave him a kiss and he went off to grab his things while you did the same, but also taking your cell phone and calling James. 

It took a few rings, but he eventually picked up. 

“Hey, did something happen?” he asked and you could still hear the sleep thick in his voice. 

“I think something’s wrong with Julian. I’m gonna take him to the hospital, can you meet us there?” 

“Yeah, of course, I’m on my way.” 

“James…the whites of his eyes were yellow. Does he have jaundice?” you asked.

“It’s possible, was there anything else?” 

“Yeah, he mentioned stomach pain, but he pointed to like his upper right abdomen, I think,” you explained while grabbing your bag and putting on some socks. 

“Makes sense as a liver issue,” you could hear his car starting in the background. “If he’s presenting symptoms now I would call an ambulance.” 

“James-,” 

“Just trust me,” he said. “Call 911.” 

“Okay,” you nodded your head and hung up, calling the emergency services and explaining the situation to them and then to Julian while you waited for them to arrive. 

James made the right call, seeing as while you were in the ambulance Julian began to throw up and the paramedics obviously handled it better than you could have if you had driven him. 

When you arrived at the ER they wheeled Julian away and you began getting flashbacks to when you first brought him in. 

“Where are you taking him?” you called after them, but no one answered you. “What the hell kind of hospital is this?! Where are you taking my son?!” 

“Ma’am they're taking your son to do a liver biopsy,” one of the nurses came back and informed you. “We need you to sign this consent form.” 

You nodded your head and took the pen from her hand, signing it, but just as you were about to ask her a question she ran off to give them the okay. 

You could feel your anger and worry bubbling inside your throat and you wanted to let it out in a scream and you were about to go running after her, but before you could you felt someone grab your wrist and pull you back. 

“James let me go,” you said warningly, looking back at your ex-husband. 

“No,” he stated just as firmly. 

“James-,” 

“I am not going to let you do something you’re going to regret,” he said and pulled you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you, even when you pushed to get away. 

“James, let me go.”

“No,” he repeated and simply held onto you tighter. 

“Let me-,” your voice broke and you stopped pushing away. “Please, Jamie, please I just want to see him,” you cried into his shirt and he squeezed you so tight you thought you might get bruises in your arm from the way he was holding you. 

“I know, I know,” he whispered. “You brought him here and he’s going to be fine.” 

“I can’t do this anymore, James. I can't be his mom and his doctor and they can’t expect me to wait out here while they drag him away and ask me to consent to God knows what.” 

James didn’t know what to tell you, instead he just continued to hold you close, rubbing his hands up and down your back, and pressed a soft kiss against your temple. 

You wrapped your arms around him and finally let yourself fully sink into his embrace, hating yourself for how much you liked it and how good it made you feel while your son was in some back corner of the ER getting a piece of his liver biopsied.

Eventually James pulled away from you, helping you dry your tears on the sleeve of his sweater and walking with his arm wrapped around you to the waiting area. You didn’t know how long you were sitting there, but it was possible that you had dozed off once or twice against James’ arm, waiting to hear some sort of news from the ER doctor. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Wilson?” 

Your eyes blinked open when James gently shook you awake. 

“That’s us,” he said. “Is Julian okay?” 

“Your son has a mild case of cirrhosis,” the doctor explained. “Due to his cystic fibrosis diagnosis we believe this is due to clogging and inflammation in his bile ducts.” 

“What does that mean for him? Does he need surgery to fix it?” you asked, fighting back a tired yawn. 

“Unfortunately, yes,” the doctor nodded. “It’s good you caught it early, there’s minimal damage to his liver so far and he’s still growing which means his liver is too. We can get him into an OR tomorrow if you consent to the surgery.” 

You looked over at James and he nodded his head. You trusted him and told the doctor you would sign the papers as soon as you could see Julian. 

“He’s been moved to the pediatric ward for now and Dr. Liu has been informed of the development. He should be in touch with you tomorrow.” 

“Thank you,” James said and when the doctor left, he helped you up and you began the walk up to the pediatric ward. 

When you arrived a nurse pointed you in the direction of his room and after each pressing a kiss to Julain’s forehead you sat on the seat bench together. 

“We should sleep,” James said, but you had a hard time imagining how that would be possible. 

“I’m having a hard time working out the logistics,” you admitted. 

“Come on, it’ll be just like on the way back from our honeymoon,” he insisted, recalling your extremely delayed flight on the way back from France, causing you to sleep with your head on James’ lap, stretched out along the airport chairs. 

You were too tired to argue or try and find another way, so you leaned down and rested your head against his legs, closing your eyes and sighing when you felt his hand rub up and down in long motions along the side of your body. Sleep could not have come quicker.

—

“Mom…Mom, Dad?” 

Julian rolled his eyes when he received no answer and grabbed the stuffed animal you had placed next to him when he’d come into the room and threw it at his sleeping parents, nailing his dad in the face. 

“Oh, God, mhm, wake up,” James shook you while he raised his hands to rub his face.

“Huh?” you opened your eyes and pushed yourself off of James’ lap. “Oh crap, my back. Remind me not to listen to you when you talk about doing something I did ten years ago.” 

“Julian, did you throw Steggy at my face?” James asked, picking up the stuffed animal from where it had fallen on you. 

“You weren’t getting up,” Julian shrugged his shoulders. 

“Julian,” you chastised and took the dinosaur from James’ hand. “You could have hurt your dad’s important doctor-face,” you joked and rubbed your hand all over James’ face making Julian laugh. 

“Okay, okay,” James moved your hand away and gave you a look. 

“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” you yawned and moved from the bench to the side of his bed. 

“A little better,” he said. “Did the doctors fix what was wrong?” 

“Not yet,” James shook his head and came to sit next to you and placed a hand on Julian’s. “You’re gonna have to go in for surgery today.” 

“A surgery?” Julian looked a little nervous. “Like cut me open?” 

“It’ll be just a line right here,” James drew it with his finger along Julian’s abdomen. “They’re going to fix a part of you called your bile duct and then sew you right back up and you’ll be good as new.” 

“Is it dangerous?” he asked. 

You looked over at James, a small note telling him to lie to make him feel better. He didn’t need to know all the details. 

“No,” James shook his head. “You’re gonna be fine and your mom and I will be here the whole time.” 

“Promise?” Julian whispered. 

“Swear on it,” James leaned in towards his son and snuck a kiss to his cheek. “We love you, buddy.” 

“I love you guys too.” 

Dr. Liu came by a little while later to inform you what time the surgery was scheduled for and he helped make Julian feel a lot better about the procedure. When it was finally time for him to go, you were a nervous wreck, but tried not to let it show for Julian’s sake, instead just pressing a big kiss to his forehead and telling him you’d be waiting for him once he got out. 

It only took about fifteen minutes of your pacing to get James to grab onto your arm and make you stop. 

“You’re gonna burn a hole in the ground,” he said. 

“I don’t know what to do with myself,” you admitted. “If I sit I’m gonna fidget, if I stand I’m going to pace.” 

“Then come on, let’s go to my office for a second, grab a coffee and a snack and then we can come back out and wait,” he suggested. 

You agreed to his idea so he stood up and you walked side by side to his office, passing House who had some comment about your dishevelled appearance together. 

“You’re an interesting man, Greg,” you shook your head at him. “You can’t think of any other reason we might be here?” 

House was silent so James explained, 

“Julian’s in surgery right now. He’s got cirrhosis.” 

“Ah so not a late night ex-wife rendez-vous. Can’t get ‘em right all the time,” he shrugged and you chuckled. “I hope the kid’s alright.” 

“Thanks, that means a lot coming from you,” you admitted. 

He raised his brows and lifted his cane to say goodbye, letting you and James continue your walk to his office. 

“House mind that you’re not spending as much time here?” you asked. 

“No, he just bothers me more when I am around,” James said while opening the door and letting you inside. 

He went towards his desk and pulled out a few packages of snacks tossing you one and you shook your head when you saw the label. 

“You still eat these? I thought the FDA recalled them?” you asked sarcastically. 

“I’m sorry I have better taste in food than you do,” he said right back. 

“Right, this is food,” you chuckled. “And if you have such good taste why didn’t your mom tell you about her secret ingredient?” 

“That’s cold,” he pointed to you with a bag of chips in his hand. 

“No, it’s true. Just like your dad telling me I was his favourite wife of yours,” you opened the bag James had tossed you. 

“Just shut up and eat your snack,” James chuckled and you listened to him, beginning to eat a little something, not realizing how hungry you were until the food made its way to your stomach. 

“You got another one of these?” you asked and he nodded, passing it to you when you were finished with the first one. 

“Feeling a little better?” James asked and you nodded your head. 

“Hey James?” you said, unsure of how you’d gotten to this point, but you were too exhausted to stop yourself from saying it. “I want you to move back in.” 

“You want me to do what?” he raised his brows and looked at you stunned. 

“I want you to move back in with me and Julian,” you said. “It’s becoming pretty clear to me that it’s safer to have two people around when possible than not and you’re already around all the time now.” 

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” he asked. “I mean you didn’t want to give Julian the wrong idea about us.” 

“Our lives changed the second we got that diagnosis. I think we need to change along with everything else.” 

You couldn’t believe that just barely twelve hours ago you were telling your friend there was no chance James had changed, but here you were saying things that had proved you had changed. Things you wouldn’t have dreamt of saying a year ago. 

“Okay,” James nodded. “I’ll move back in.” 

You just silently hoped you wouldn’t regret asking. 

Waiting for Julian to get out of surgery was a little easier now that you had some food in your stomach and you decided to wait on coffee until you got the note from the surgeon that everything had gone well. 

As James had continued to assure you almost a hundred times, the surgery went fine and before you knew it you were back in Julian’s room watching him sleep off the anaesthetic. 

“You know he looks like you when he sleeps,” James said from the bench while you sat on the bed next to Julian. 

“He does?” 

“Yeah, his nose does that same scrunchy thing when he sniffles and when he snores-,” 

“Hey, I only snore when I’m congested,” you said defensively. 

“I never minded,” James smiled. “I thought it was cute when you sounded like an old man.” 

“Yeah, but you’re not fond of all my old man characteristics,” you turned around to face him, still holding Julian’s hand in yours. 

“All your old man characteristics?” James furrowed his brows in confusion. 

“You told me I argued like an old man. Stubborn and could only see my own way. And I fought dirty.” 

“You sure did,” James nodded. “If you brandishing my mother’s clear favouritism shows anything, it’s definitely that you fight dirty, but I never said I disliked that about you.” 

“Really? Near the end I thought there was a lot you disliked about me.” 

James shook his head, “No, I was just upset and you were passionate. It wasn’t like my other marriages where things just…fizzled.” 

“We did go out with a bang,” you inhaled deeply. 

“If it weren’t for Julian… do you think we’d…” 

You shook your head. 

“No, we probably never would have seen each other again. Another old man trait, I hold a pretty mean grudge.” 

James pressed his lips together and looked over at his sleeping son. 

“I’m happy we had him,” he said quietly. “Even if we didn’t work out.” 

“Me too,” you agreed, looking over at Julian quietly snoring, just like his dad had said. “Best thing that’s ever happened to me.” 

You leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to Julian’s nose watching him scrunch it up, making you smile. It was a miracle that two such flawed individuals could make a child so perfect. 

—

“Alright, he is asleep, but I do warn you it took some bribery so you’ll have to buy him another dinosaur book to read to him at night,” you walked out of Julian’s room, dusting your hands off like you’d just finished a heavy labour job. 

“I’ll run to the bookstore tomorrow,” James nodded and you fell onto the couch next to him and sighing as you sunk into the plush fabric before noticing what he was doing. 

“Where did you pull these out of?” you asked with a soft chuckle. 

“I was just clearing up the closet in the guest bedroom and I found a box of these,” he picked up the albums. “Look at this one.” 

He placed the book of photos on your lap and you smiled seeing as it was Julian’s baby album, filled with small mementos and little notes you and James had made in the margins. 

“Oh my God, Mom’s first day home, she looks like an angel,” you read from the side. “And my response: I look like I just got hit by a bus, cut it out.” 

“You can still read my chicken scratch writing?” James asked. 

“My most useless talent as I like to call it,” you nodded. “You wrote a lot in here.” 

“I used to bring it with me to work cause I missed you guys so much,” he admitted. “Made me feel closer to you.” 

You read through some of the notes in the book, chuckling a little at some of the written back and forth you had. Eventually you got to the family portraits you’d had taken a few months after Julian was born, smiling softly to yourself. 

You remembered the day well, you felt like you hadn’t slept in weeks, James was just getting off of a twelve-hour shift and you were almost late to your appointment with the photographer. You were worried everything was going to look terrible and you’d barely had enough time to do your hair or makeup, but James had silenced your worries with a kiss and assured you the pictures would be fine. 

In the end most of them were terrible, but the photographer managed to get two shots, one of you and James smiling down at Julian in your arms and another immediately after where you were looking up and smiling at each other. 

“That session was a shitshow,” you recalled and James agreed. “We did get a few nice things out of it though.” 

You looked back down at the pile of albums in front of you and noticed a large white one, tucked under a few things and even though nothing good could come of it, you pulled it out from the bottom of the pile, carefully blowing off the dust and turning the first page. 

Centerfold, just like you remembered it, was a picture of you and James on your wedding day. You leaned further back into the couch and James scooched in closer to get a look. 

You both looked younger in the picture, with that spark of je ne sais quoi in your eyes. 

“I told you there was a reason we got married,” he said quietly, his hand brushing the corner of the photo. 

“Yeah, we loved each other,” you said. “That was the reason.” 

“Same reason we decided to have Julian,” he added. 

You could feel your breathing become a little more shallow and a tightness in your chest as James spoke about Julian. You remembered the conversations so clearly, like you’d had them yesterday, caught between happy and passionate kisses while James made some dirty jokes about getting you pregnant. 

That was back when he still couldn’t get enough of you. Before things changed and he slowly distanced himself until it felt like it was just you and Julian against the rest of the world, and not the three of you like he had promised all those nights throughout your pregnancy. 

You wondered quietly to yourself what had changed? What had become so unbearable that there was distance in the first place? There was never a lack of love on your end which is why this was dangerous. 

At least when there was distance you could be angry with him, you could go to bed at night and not remember all the little things that made you love him in the first place. He wasn’t there as a constant  reminder that you loved his cooking, or even just your banter together. More importantly, it was giving you new reasons to feel that fluttering feeling in your stomach. 

You’d always loved how he’d interact with Julian, but now that you got to see it day in and day out, it made it harder to weigh that against the cons of everything. Most notably, this was the beginning of the end. If you let yourself fall you would both crash and Julian would be caught in the middle once again. 

You tried to distract yourself by flipping through the album photos to find some funny old picture of a relative or maybe even an embarrassing moment to tone down whatever it was that looking at that picture was making you feel. 

All you could focus on was how in every picture, almost without fail, James was looking over at you. Rarely into the camera along with everyone else. He was enamoured, that was the only word to describe it, and oh how much you missed that look. 

You made the mistake of tearing away your gaze from the pictures, looking up at James instead, and for a moment you thought just maybe you saw that same look in his eyes. But no. It couldn’t have been. The dim light of the lamp must have been playing tricks on you. 

Finally you closed the album and put it back down, unsure of what feelings might resurface if you opened another one. Your honeymoon, family dinners and pictures were all just reminders of the happy times, not what came after.

James did what you didn’t want to, grabbing another album and sifting through the pages until he found what he was looking for, taking a picture out of its protective sleeve and showing it to you. 

“Can I keep this one?” he asked. 

You took it from his hands, examining it while your fingers precariously held the edges of the photograph. 

It was a silly picture, something you had taken while you were travelling. James got someone to take the camera, but along with snapping a few shots while you were posed with smiles they caught a few candids, most notably, James kissing your cheek while you laughed and tried to squirm out of his grasp. 

Your finger gently brushed over the spot on the photo where James’ lips were against your cheek before nodding your head. 

“Sure, you can have it,” you handed him back the picture and patted your hands against your legs, preparing to stand up. “I should get to bed.”

“I’ll be out here for a while longer if you need anything.”

You gave him a tight lipped smile and stood up, walking towards your bedroom. When you closed the door behind you, you let out a breath you had been holding and ran a hand across your face. 

Maybe Julian was never the one at risk of getting the wrong idea.

—

Waking up in the middle of the night always made you feel uneasy. Especially if Julian was the one waking you up. The chance that you’d have to drive to the hospital or call an ambulance was high and you hated the fear and worry that came along with any possible complications. 

Tonight, you woke up on your own accord. Your heart was beating inside your throat and your stomach felt like it was housing a group of persistent butterflies. 

You glanced over at the clock and saw the time, flashing in red. 

3:07

You took a deep breath trying to steady your heart rate and breathing before peeling away your blanket and kicking your feet over the side of the bed. You grabbed a different pair of pyjamas from your dresser and walked into the washroom, tossing them on the far end of the floor while you stripped down and turned on the water for the shower. 

When you stepped inside you hissed initially at the cold, but forced yourself to become fully submerged under the water, closing the curtain behind you. Your muscles clenched as your body adjusted to the temperature, and when the time finally came you let your thoughts and dreams become washed away by the water coming out of the shower head. 

You were simply standing there, letting the water fall on your face when you heard the click of the door opening. 

“Julian, sweetie,” you sighed, turning around so you could speak. “Maybe you should go to your dad if something’s wrong, I’ll come out in a sec.” 

“No need,” you heard a voice that did not belong to your son. 

“James? I’m in the shower. What are you doing?” you asked incredulously, feeling the need to cover yourself up even though there was a curtain blocking his view. You felt exposed nonetheless. 

“It’s three in the morning, I thought something was wrong, I came to check on you,” he explained. 

“And what were you doing up?” you asked. 

“Got in late. There was an emergency at the hospital after you guys went to sleep, I dealt with it and just came back.”

You stepped under the running water again, washing the water over your face with your hands. 

“So, is everything okay?” 

“Peachy,” you said sarcastically, leaning against the wall of the shower. 

“Nobody ever says peachy when things are okay,” James pushed further and you sighed, moving to sit down on the floor of the shower, still positioned under the water. 

“I just had a dream, that’s all,” you said, watching as the water hit your toes and the ground around you. 

“A bad dream?” he asked. 

“No, it was more like… déjà vu.”

James sighed, and rubbed his hands on his legs. 

“Was it about us?” 

He took your silence as a yes. 

James didn’t really know what to say, his hands were clasped together as he leaned  forward sitting on the bathroom counter. 

“You’re not gonna ask what it’s about?” you hugged your knees close to your chest. 

“Would you tell me?” 

“Maybe…I don’t know,” you mumbled. 

There was another moment of silence before James spoke up again, 

“What was it about?” 

You turned to face the water with your eyes closed again, gathering the courage to speak. 

“It started when I told you I was pregnant,” you said softly. “Like the memory replayed in my head, exactly how it happened.” 

“I remember that day,” you heard the soft smile in his voice as he spoke. “You took the test at work and when it came back positive you came straight to the hospital to tell me.” 

“I was barely two steps inside your office when I blurted it out, you were eating lunch and had that stupid look on your face with a mouth full of sandwich,” you chuckled to yourself.

“I almost choked on that,” James shook his head. “And I just remember running up to you and freaking out.”

“And then when you were done freaking out and everything sunk in you kissed me, and you told me you loved me, and we cried because we made a child. Our love did that.” 

You reached forward and turned the shower off, pushing yourself up on your feet and taking a deep breath before pulling back the curtain. You had told him what you were thinking. You couldn’t get any more exposed than that.

James looked stunned for a moment and it didn’t go unnoticed how his eyes raked up and down your figure. 

“Get me the robe, would you?” you motioned to the back of the door and he jumped down grabbing the robe and holding it out for you so you could place your arms into the sleeves and wrap the towelled fabric around you, trying it off with the belt. 

When you turned your head to look back at James, you could tell at least you’d succeeded in raising his heart rate, much like he was doing for you recently. 

You moved to go sit on the closed toilet while James retook his spot on the counter. 

“Do you remember when Julian was born?” he whispered. 

“I like it was yesterday. I can’t believe it’s been eight years,” you nodded your head. 

He was having trouble holding your gaze and you wondered what he was about to say. 

“I-I screwed up,” his voice was soft, almost hurt, like it pained him to think about what he had done. “When you were resting afterwards the nurse asked me if we were going to do a newborn screening. We hadn’t talked about it, but you were so tired and it was such a hard labour…” he swallowed thickly, his voice wavering slightly, remembering the birth. It wasn’t easy by any means and James had often thought that the hardest thing he’d ever had to watch was you in that much pain. “I told her we weren’t going to do it. I just didn’t want Julian to leave and h-he looked so perfect I never thought anything could have been wrong with him.” 

James took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling, “I am a doctor and I didn’t get a newborn screening for my son, what the hell kind of father does that make me?” 

“Oddly enough, I think it makes you a good one,” you admitted. 

“Even though we could have known about this years before? We could have gotten him treatment, medication, therapies, all sooner?” he looked back at you confused. 

“You said it yourself, Jamie. He was perfect for us. Still is.” 

James nodded his head and looked forward at the opposite wall. You stood up and walked over towards him, reaching out a hand to gently hold his face, your thumb brushing against his cheek while he looked at you. 

“I don’t blame you for this,” you whispered. “I don’t blame you and I don’t think you’re a bad father.” 

“I know,” he murmured, “but I do.”

You leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, not knowing what other comfort you could offer. 

James leaned in a little to your touch, sitting up straighter when it was gone, trying to play it off like he hadn’t been missing it and craving it as much as you. 

You were about to say something when you heard a knock on the washroom door, and this time it had to be Julian. 

“Mom? Dad, are you in here too?” you could hear his small sounding voice, a little strained and worried so you quickly assured him you were both inside and opened the door. 

“Sweetheart, what happened?” you asked, noticing his tear-stained face. 

“I just had a bad dream,” he sniffed and wiped his eyes. 

You kissed away his tears first before assuring him everything would be fine, you and James were there to take care of him. 

“Why don’t you go and lay down on my bed with your Dad?” you suggested. “I’ll get dressed and come join you.” 

Julian nodded and made his way over to your bed while you went to quickly speak to James. 

“It’ll be good for you. Both of you,” you told him. 

“You don’t mind?” 

“Just this once.” 

James thanked you with a kiss to your cheek and left the adjoining washroom, closing the door behind him and giving you a minute to get changed and deal with anything you needed to before going back to bed. 

When you opened the door and came back into your room, you saw James under the covers with Julian pressed close to him, their foreheads resting together while James told him everything was going to be alright and he could go back to sleep. 

You slipped in under the covers, sandwiching Julian between you both, letting his back rest against your chest while you pressed a kiss to his hair. 

One hand was tucked under your pillow and another was draped over Julian, and your fingers carefully placed over top of James’. 

“Will you be here when I wake up?” Julian asked his dad. 

“Right next to you,” he kissed his nose. “Now try to get some sleep, okay?” 

Julian nodded his head and yawned and you whispered a quiet goodnight to bed him and his dad before letting your eyes close, silently smiling when you could feel James’ hand finally hold your own. 

—

“You guys, relax, he’s going to be fine,” Mahlet placed a hand on both yours and James’ shoulders while you spewed out your worries. “It’s one night, I have the whole list of things he needs and I’ve taken care of him before, right? It’s just at my house this time so the boys can have a sleepover and you two can have a bit of a break.” 

“She’s right,” James sighed. “I’m still worried out of my mind, but she’s right.” 

“Mahi, are you sure you don’t want us to come even for a little bit?” you asked. 

“Absolutely, if something happens I’ll call an ambulance and then you, but Julian’s been good for months now, he can survive one night away from home,” she assured you. 

“Thank you, Mahlet. I’m sure Julian and Hennock will have a great time tonight. Just call us when he’s ready to be picked up tomorrow morning,” James said. 

James wrapped his arm around you, giving you a squeeze knowing you were still uneasy about this, but deep down you knew Mahlet was right. The chances of something going wrong at this point were small and you’d had enough time since your last hospital visit to even consider doing something like this. 

“You boys ready?” James called and Julian came rushing out of the room with his bag in hand, Hennock following close behind him. 

“You have fun tonight, okay?” you bent down and gave Julian a kiss. “And if anything happens or you feel sick, or are having trouble breathing, tell Mahlet, okay?” 

“I know, Mom. Dad already told me this like fifteen times,” Julian chuckled. 

You looked up at James and he shrugged. 

“Alright, well you guys better go before I change my mind,” you crossed your arms over your chest and that was all the permission the boys needed to run off, leaving Mahlet to say goodbye before stepping out and closing the door behind her. 

You sighed and turned around, looking at James who had his hands shoved into his pockets. 

“You hungry?” he asked. 

“I could eat,” you nodded your head. 

“Why don’t we make something for dinner together?” he suggested. 

You looked at the clock and smiled, “I think we’ve got enough time for pizza, what do you think?” 

“I think that’s a great plan,” James agreed. “I can start on the dough and you get the sauce and toppings?” 

You gave him a thumbs up before putting your hand out to high-five him, noticing how your fingers so easily intertwined before you walked apart and let go. 

James rolled up his sleeves and took off his watch, placing it on the small jewelry tray you kept by the sink for when you were washing dishes, while you went to the fridge and began pulling out all the things that could make good pizza toppings. 

Moving to the sink to wash some vegetables, you noticed James’ watch resting there. You didn’t pay much attention when he was wearing it, but now you realized why it looked extra familiar. It was one you had gotten him as an anniversary present after your first year married. 

“You still wear that?” you pointed with your eyes to the watch. 

“It’s my favourite watch, of course I wear it,” he nodded while portioning the flour into a large bowl.

“Even with that engraving?” you raised a questioning brow. 

“Dearest Jamie, Here’s to the first of many happy anniversaries. Love forever, Your Wife,” he recited the engraving back to you. 

“I don’t know why you do that to yourself,” you chuckled a little, looking down into the sink. 

“Yeah, well why do you still go by Mrs. Wilson?” 

“Easier to keep the name than change it again,” you partially lied, it wasn’t the full truth, but it was what you had been telling yourself ever since the divorce was finalized. 

James could sense you were lying, but he knew the only way to get you to open up would be to let himself be open with you. 

“The watch is my favourite because you gave it to me. Functionally it sucks and it's uncomfortable, but you went out of your way to get me something that looked nice and that’s why I love it.” 

You smiled a little to yourself, but kept your head facing the sink and continued to wash the vegetables. 

“You’re not going to say anything?” he inquired. 

“Do I have to?” you asked. 

“That’s normally how a conversation works,” he remarked and you chuckled. 

“What do you want me to say?” you asked. 

“Honestly, the real reason why you kept your married name,” he said plainly. 

You sighed, “It wasn’t a full lie. If I went back to my maiden name Julian and I wouldn’t have the same last name it just makes things complicated and confusing and I didn’t want to deal with it, but,” you added, “I always kind of liked the sound of Mrs. Wilson and even though I was pissed at you all the time I still liked that there was one thing aside from Julian connecting us. I don’t know, maybe I didn’t want to end up like Sam or Bonnie just…detached, like there was barely a trace that you were even there.” 

“It’s a fingerprint,” James said. “Mine.” 

“Yeah, even though it's small for who we were to each other, it's the fingerprint you left on my life.” 

James pressed his lips together and opened his mouth to say something before shutting it and evaluated how he was going to speak, 

“Can I ask you something?” he settled on. 

“Sure,” you nodded, moving over to the cutting board and placing yourself on the opposite side of the kitchen island. 

“Did…Did you ever stop loving me?” 

Your smile faltered and James noticed the change in your demeanor, quickly retracting his question. 

“You know what, forget I asked,” he shook his head and continued to knead the dough. 

There was a moment of silence before you spoke again. 

“I didn’t, but I got tired of not being loved back.” 

James stopped what he was doing and looked up at you with concern. 

“You thought I stopped loving you?” he asked.

“James, I was wife number three. Didn’t take much to connect the dots and see you got tired of me,” you said bluntly. “I wanted to know if I could count on you, and it was starting to feel like maybe I couldn’t. Then the divorce happened and everything after that just made me feel like I was right.” 

James chewed on the inside of his cheek and remained silent. 

“You didn’t fight for me,” you said quietly. “You fought for joint custody, but you didn’t fight for me. You just…accepted it.” 

“I…I didn’t know you wanted me to fight for you.” 

“Are you saying you would have?” you asked, unsure of whether or not you wanted to hear his answer. 

“I’m saying I thought I didn’t even have a chance,” he admitted. 

“So you wouldn’t have,” you clarified for him, beginning to chop the toppings into pieces and separate them into bowls. 

He chuckled humourlessly, “I have dated one person since the divorce. I hated it.” 

“Why do you have to talk in puzzles, James? Why can’t you just come out and say what you really mean?” 

“And then what?” he asked. “We go back to living in the same house. Sleep in separate rooms. Move on now that we know the truth?”

“Say it,” you put the knife down and looked him right in the eyes. 

“What are you going to do about it?” he asked, cleaning the dough off his hand. “I’m going to say it and you’re just going to stand there and I have to live with that?” 

You walked around the counter and came right up in front of him. 

“If you were listening to anything I was saying, you would stop making excuses and say it.” 

“Fine!” he threw his hands up in the air. “I still love you. I never stopped loving you. These past few months, even though stressful, have been the happiest I’ve been in so long because I feel like myself again when I’m with you and Julian. Because I feel like your husband, and I feel like a father and I keep kicking myself wondering how I could have been so stupid to lose that.” 

“Say it one more time,” you whispered, lifting your hands to hold onto his face. “Please.” 

“I love you,” his voice was softer, relieved like after being underwater he could finally breathe again. 

You finally pulled him into you, your lips hesitantly resting on his at first, before you found your rhythm again after so long. It was muscle memory, his hands finding the spot they always rested against on your hips, his lips moving in synch with yours, eventually trailing off and finding their favourite spot against your jaw and behind your ear. 

“James,” you breathed. 

“Jamie,” he mumbled against your skin. “Call me Jamie.” 

“Jamie, Jamie, Jamie,” you repeated the nickname until he silenced you with another kiss, muffling your voice. 

“God, I missed you,” he whispered when you pulled apart, breathing heavily due to your fast beating heart. 

You closed your eyes while your forehead rested against his, feeling his nose touch yours, his hands still firmly planted on your hips when your thumbs brushed against his cheeks. 

“Jamie?” 

James snuck another small kiss at the sound of the nickname. 

“Yes, my love.” 

“Can I count on you?” 

You could feel him nod his head and confirm with a verbal ‘yes’. And even if it turned out to be a lie, at that moment you didn’t care. He had proved to you that it was possible, you could work with that. 

“I love you,” you said and kissed his nose and then you said it and kissed him again for good measure. “You told me twice; I tell you twice.” 

James moved his hands up from your hips and brushed the back of his fingers against your cheek, a warm smile coming to his face. 

And there was that look, the one you thought had vanished over time. His eyes fully transfixed on you with nothing but love and admiration. It didn’t take much to convince yourself you could get used to seeing that look for a long, long time. 

TAGLIST —

@cuntyvicodin @paola-carter

#james wilson #james wilson x reader #james wilson x you #dr wilson #dr wilson x reader #dr wilson x you #house md #house md fanfiction #house md x reader #hate crimes md #james wilson fanfiction #james wilson fanfic #james wilson fic

[ghostlygeto]

wish u were here | james wilson

pairing: james wilson x reader

warnings: you just gotta hear me out guys. whats it called when it isnt technically cheating but it feels like cheating (from both parties, not on each other), entirely self indulgent and selfship coded, wilson calls reader "birdie" (cringe idc), angst. based loosely on lips of an angel by hinder and glimpse of us by joji, thats all for now plz forgive me

word count: 1.4k

wilson rubbed his eyes, trying to wipe the sleep from them as he heard his phone vibrating on the nightstand next to him. the name lighting up his screen was yours, causing him to hurriedly grab his phone and press answer.

“hello?” his voice was tired, still laced with the deep sleep he was pulled from for this phone call. “y/n, you know it’s almost three in the morning, right?” wilson slowly removed the covers from his legs, trying his best not to wake his fiance sleeping next to him.

“james,” the soft exhale of his name made his heart ache. how long had it been since you last spoke? “sorry, i know it’s late. it’s probably stupid to call you i just…” the small sob caught him off guard.

“are you crying?” wilson closed the bathroom door, still keeping his voice down just in case. “is everything okay?”

there was a hesitation on the other end of the phone and he could feel it. you were trying to find a way around telling him the truth. “birdie, you know you can trust me.”

birdie. that godawful, stupid nickname you used to hate. you used to roll your eyes every time he’d use it to get your attention, or let it slip in conversation with your friends and coworkers. but now it just made another cry escape your lips. you missed it, you missed him.

“just miss you,” you whispered, trying to keep your voice down as well. “we’ve been fighting a lot lately. and you were in my dream last night- it just felt right to call you.”

wilson sighed. he was relieved to hear that you were okay, his heart rate steadying. though he couldn’t help the annoyed feeling that overtook him as you mentioned your current boyfriend. “i’m glad you’re safe, but you know you really shouldn’t have-”

“can we save the lecture for another time, james?” you let out a shaky laugh. you don’t know what else you expected from him, “i just wanted to hear your voice.”

his free hand ran over his face, trying to rationalize it in his head. it would be okay if he spoke to you, right? just speaking on the phone isn’t wrong, and it wouldn’t hurt anyone. right?

“i can stay on for a little bit. but not too long, if she were to find out i’m on the phone with you it’ll just cause a fight.” wilson sat on the cool tile of his bathroom floor, back against the door. his eyes closed as he listened to the sound of your voice through the phone. “do you need to talk about the fights?”

“it hasn’t been anything serious. it just seems like he’s always angry, i can never win with him.” you sigh, “maybe i’m just too busy comparing him to you all the time. i know i shouldn’t. but it’s hard not to.”

wilson wanted to provide you some sort of comfort, let you know that he often did the same with his fiance. “have you still been going to therapy?”

“yeah.” you answer quickly, remembering how he urged you to talk to someone after you two split, because it would be good for you. “she doesn’t know much about my current partner, though. i don’t like to talk about him.” i don’t love him. you wanted to say, but bit your tongue. you weren’t sure if that would help or hurt anything. probably hurt, if you had to guess.

“if you don’t tell her how is she supposed to help you?” you hadn’t changed a bit, and that made his heart ache. you were the exact same version of yourself that he was in love with. knowing that makes leaving you less justifiable, it makes getting over you harder. “you have to cooperate with her.”

“can you tell me about how you’ve been?” you asked, a sniffle following. “is she nice to you?” you didn’t want to talk about yourself, not really. especially not about what you have or haven’t been talking about in therapy. 

right, the two of you hadn’t spoken since breaking up. despite working at the same hospital, the two of you managed very easily to avoid each other. afterall, the morgue and the oncology department weren’t exactly wall neighbors.

“yeah, yeah she is nice to me.” wilson nodded, a small smile finding its way to his face. he loves his fiance, she’s an amazing woman. she surprises him and makes him dinner, likes watching his favorite shows with him. but… “but she isn’t you.”

you weren’t aware that four words could change your mood so quickly, feeling your stomach fill with warmth and you heart beat quickened. it was nice, in a fucked up way, to know that he missed you as much as you missed him.

“it’s frustrating,” wilson added, “seems like everytime we’re having a good moment i just think of you. wondering to myself if i would be enjoying it more if it were you.” it felt nice to say out loud, like it was a secret he had been keeping for a long time (it was). “sometimes i think she knows.”

“sometimes he does things you used to do and i swear it’s like i can see you standing there instead of him.” you confess, tears still falling down your face despite the smile. “i’m glad she treats you well. it’s what you deserve.”

what he deserves is a death sentence. he internally scolded himself, knowing that he shouldn’t be doing this. he shouldn’t be on the phone with you after not speaking for a year and a half. he was supposed to be getting married this time next year. yet here he was, sitting on his bathroom floor and talking with you, his ex on the phone at half past three in the morning.

“you deserve someone who is going to make you happy, too, y/n.” wilson swallowed harshly. why did he so badly want to be the one to make you happy? why did he feel so bothered over the thought of it being someone that isn’t him? “you should just…just dump that asshole. you know you could do better.”

you wanted to laugh. he was right, of course you could do better. “honestly when i break up with him i think it’ll be my last for awhile. i’m…tired of putting effort into people who don’t do the same.”

he wasn’t sure how many people you had seen since he broke things off with you, he had intentionally avoided that information from house because he didn’t want to know. it didn’t matter if it had been only one or several, he knew he’d hate it either way. “you can’t think like that. then you’ll never find anyone.” encouraging you to find someone else. that was the right thing to be doing here. encouraging you to seek comfort in someone that wasn’t him, or your piece of shit boyfriend. “you’ve always been so pessimistic, just try to look on the bright side of things for once, yeah?”

“you answering the phone is the only bright side i think i’ve had for awhile,” you confess with a laugh and another sniffle. you weren’t sure when you stopped crying but you were thankful you had, already feeling the headache it would bring on. “do you think we can ever be friends again?”

wilson stiffened. yes. he wanted to tell you. but he wasn’t sure that was the right answer. “i don’t know, y/n. there’s a lot that would have to happen for us to be able to be friends again.” i’d have to get over you. 

“i knew that’s what you were going to say,” you gave a lighthearted chuckle. “i should…get off of here now. it’s late. we work in the morning. goodnight, james. it was nice talking to you.”

“you, too, y/n. goodnight.” wilson listened to the call disconnect as he let his phone clatter to the ground. it had been so long, he had been doing so well not thinking of you until tonight. all it took was one little phone call for you to worm your way back into his heart.

or rather, it only took one phone call for him to remember why he never should have let you go to begin with.

i rly am amazed that im posting this in 2023 but he is literally the love of my life right now. comments, reblogs, and likes appreciated!

#james wilson x reader #dr james wilson x reader #wilson x reader #house md x reader #mine !! #jami !! #this is about my selfship. js.