#do your research on the fish species and what they need damn it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hime-memes · 1 year

Text

* Kurtis Conner Sentence Starters *

Been on a Kurtis Connor youtube video kick lately and since his commentary can be pretty funny, I figured I’d make some sentence starters from his dialogue. ( This is just a couple videos worth, but I may make other parts later. )

As always: These have been modified for cohesive and sensical use. Feel free to change anything within these that you see fit to make it work for your muse & the receiver’s muse !

Recommended For: Any muses/plots/timelines.

Trigger Warnings For: Swearing & Innuendo

“ I’ll be in Heaven ... no, I’ll be in Hell while some fuckin’ demon sets me on fire, and I’ll be like ‘ See this shit ? Cringe ‘. “ “ ... It was like the cringe grand central station ... “ “ Then the country boys come up and they’re like ‘ Yeehaw, fuckers ! ’ “ “ Actors are usually, like, really cool people and never a chore to be around; just think of any theater kid you ever met ... Super cool and not annoying, right ? “ “ Well, I guess regular movies are just really long POV videos. “ “ First off, eye contact -- went on just WAY too long, oh my god. “ “ I guess I am a country boy at heart, damn. “ “ If someone I don’t know makes eye contact with me for longer than, like, five seconds; I’m kinda nauseous. I don’t like it at all ! “ “ That almost put me in a fuckin’ coma, dude. “ “ Eye ... needa ... Contact ... my doctor ! “ “ Dude, I just filmed a fuckin’ banger bro, it’s just a slapper of a tikkytok ! -- Dude, I need a fuckin’ sick caption for it dude ! “ “ Oh great, it’s just you staring at the camera and smirking ... again. “ “ I said -- I compensate you handsomely: I’m handsome and that is your compensation ! “ “ It says: #POV - You are the ant looking for food in the bathroom and you see this human. Then you catch feelings. “ “ When I saw that I was like: ‘ Okay -- this guy wants to fuck ants ‘ ... “ “ Yo, I gotta see them ant tiddies up close ... Yeah, what that thorax do though, huh ? Hey Ma, I’ve seen a bugs life ... now it’s time for a bug’s sex life ! “ “ That gives me the right to say, [ name ], likes to make sweet passionate love ... to insects ! “ “ It’s just weird to me -- emotionally lip syncing a song ? That’s ... that’s not acting ! “ “ Is that a puka shell necklace bro ?! For some reason, that would make this video better and that’s rare. If a puka shell necklace increases the quality of a video ? Uh oh ... “ “ Please tell me I’m hot. Please tell me I’m hot. Please tell me I’m fuckin’ hot ! “ “ Am I jealous ? ... Yes. Yes, I am. “ “ Ants are kinda thicc though, I’ll give ‘em that. Ants are thicc. “ “ Look at me now ... buying a handsome tiktoker’s onlyfans ... FOR RESEARCH ! “ “ The idea of an indoor boyfriend, wow, that is really funny ! “ “ That would be a miserable life if you were the indoor boyfriend. You’d just stay inside all the time. “ “ I’m going to meet my outdoor boyfriend, I’ll be back in a few hours. “ “ I don’t want to be an indoor boyfriend anymore, what can I say ? “ “ I’m losing my indoor mind, outdoor boyfriend, why can’t I ? “ “ I needed to complete the trilogy ... the tri-lie-gy. “ “ We’re going to look at lies people told on the internet for attention. “ “ No one year old baby is going to wake you up crying ‘ I wanna go to work for you ! ‘. No, they’re gonna poke you and be like: ‘ Me hungy and bored, give me hotdog and also my iPad ! Now, bitch ‘ ! “ “ The kid obviously didn’t want the work uniform on. “ “ We’ve all been to an aquarium where the tanks were just open and you could toss your food in there. It’s not like there’s huge fucking glass walls in there between and the rare fish species or anything. “ “ Long story short, a fish ... spit water ... into my mouth. It was, like, super hot ! “

#rp meme #sentence starters #roleplay sentence starters

5 notes · View notes

galactic-magick · 3 years

Text

Oblivious: Tech x Reader

Request: Could u possibly do a Tech x Reader where the batch is on an ocean planet of sorts and tech and the reader are nerding out over something like tide pools and the rest of the batch is like “how are these two so smart yet so oblivious to their feelings?”

Summary: You and The Bad Batch settle on an ocean planet for the night, and you and Tech seem to know everything except your own feelings for each other.

Words: 1000+

Warnings: none

Author’s Notes: Had to do some research on tide pools for this one lmao, and I made up a bunch of fake star wars science that probably doesn’t make any sense whatsoever, earth science experts don’t come at me pls XD

Laying low has been incredibly difficult for you and The Bad Batch, none of you are exactly the type to “blend in.” You’ve been hopping all over the galaxy, until you come across a planet almost entirely covered in ocean. It’s habitable, but not many people live on it due to the lack of large segments of land.

Thankfully though, you find an island that’s big enough for your ship and make a landing. You run out into the fresh air, the smell of salt water and cool breeze filling your nose. Tech follows close behind, analyzing the planet’s climate and resources, and the rest soon after.

“The tides are going to get much higher over the next couple hours, we’re going to lose much of the land we have right now,” Tech says, moving down the beach. “Don’t set anything up past this point,”

“Can we build a fire?” Wrecker asks excitedly.

“Why would we need a fire? Our ship has a heating system,”

“Because I want to!” he crosses his arms. “And what if the ship runs out of heat?”

“I think that’s a great idea!” Omega pipes up. “I’ve never even seen a campfire before,”

“You haven’t?!” Wrecker takes her hand and points to the small forest of trees on the other side of the island. “C’mon, let’s go!”

“Wait!” Tech calls after them, but they’re too fast. “Ugh. The wood is going to be too wet to use anyway, they’re wasting their time,”

“Hey, it doesn’t hurt to let them try,” you smile. “Besides, we’ll only be here a day or two at most, right?”

“I suppose,”

You skip across the rocks and sand, finding a couple tide pools with several sea creatures in them, “Look over here!”

“Careful, those are incredibly slippery,”

“I’ve never seen anything like these,” you poke at one. “Wait, didn’t you say high tide is later? That means the water will go even farther than this, we might be in trouble,”

“Not exactly. Tides are different depending on the gravitational pulls and phases of the moons, and this planet has three,”

“So?”

“So we’ll be fine,”

“This water is fresh, Tech. I don’t see how more moons changes the fact that these waves are going to drown us in a few hours,” you sigh. “Look, I get that you’re the intellectual around here, but I had ones like these back on my home planet, I know what I’m talking about,”

“Every planet is different, this one isn’t due for another tide that high for at least a couple weeks, the pools must just be deeper than average,”

“I guess you’re right,” you trust him, so you refrain from bickering any further. “Oh look! I think I’ve seen that fish before!”

“Really?” he cocks his head, looking towards where you’re pointing. “While interplanetary travel of non-sentient species is uncommon, it’s not impossible, although in most cases it’s considered an invasive species-“

“Nevermind,” you say as you lean closer. “It just looks similar,”

“Ah, I see,”

“You know, I love the kind of creatures in here, somehow they manage to survive despite the harsh conditions,” one of them crawls onto your hand. “They just stick to anything they can so they don’t get washed away by the water,”

“Especially somewhere like this,” he nods.

“What are you lovebirds going on about now?” Hunter exhales, walking up to you and barely holding back a smirk.

Both you and Tech immediately stop talking, avoiding eye contact. Sure, it’s true you fancy him a bit, but no way are you lovebirds of any sort. You bicker too much to ever admit your feelings anyway, and all your conversations are friendly or just exchanging thoughts and facts. Nothing special.

“You know,” Hunter continues. “You guys are the smartest people on the crew, but damn are you oblivious,”

He walks away, leaving you two in silence.

Against all odds, Wrecker and Omega actually do manage to make a fire for the evening. Omega’s eyes are glued to the flames, watching in awe and drowning out everything else.

You and Tech haven’t talked much since being called out by Hunter, not necessarily because you’re mad or bitter, but simply because you don’t know what to say.

Was Hunter right? Were you actually super into each other and you were just too stupid to see it?

Now that you think of it, Tech definitely treats you differently than everybody else. Not just because you’re not one of his brothers, but he genuinely goes out of his way to help and care about you. He’s super sweet when he wants to be.

As it gets later, most of the crew heads back to the ship to sleep. You’re honestly not that tired, so you stay by the fire, and Tech doesn’t leave either.

“Hey,”

“Hello,” he nods.

You scoot over until you’re sitting next to him, “What’s going on in that brain of yours?”

“Just…thinking,” he keeps staring forward at the fire. “For the first time in my life, I’m completely unsure about something,”

“How so?”

“Well, all my life, all our lives for that matter,” he gestures to the ship. “We’ve been born, raised, and trained to be soldiers. We’re literally created and grown for that purpose. We accept early on that we’ll probably never get the opportunity to live a normal life on our own terms. We don’t get the luxury of going where we want to go, staying where we want to stay. We don’t even get to choose our clothes or our food most of the time. We don’t get our own home, we don’t get to pick our jobs, we-“ he pauses. “We don’t get to fall in love,”

A quiet “oh” leaves your lips.

“Now that the Republic is gone, and we left the Empire, we’re not just soldiers anymore. We have the freedom to do all those things we couldn’t do. But how do I know what I should or shouldn’t pursue? How do I know what parts of normal life I should experience?”

You quickly lean in and kiss him, “You try it, Tech,”

He stares at you stunned, struggling to process what just happened.

“I…I think I should try it again. Just to be absolutely certain,”

“Of course,” you chuckle, kissing him again.

#tech x reader #the bad batch x reader #tbb x reader #tbb tech x reader #the bad batch #star wars #the bad batch imagine #tech imagine

121 notes · View notes

botwstoriesandsuch · 4 years

Text

DEAR FISH FUCKERS, YOU’RE WELCOME

I’ve done what no other has done before (to my knowledge) and found the aging system for the Zora!

Ok so this started as simple research for this ask

See, I misread the phrasing of “best educated guess” to “research for 2 hours and come to a conclusive answer” so anyhow before I indulge you into the answers of the universe allow me to explain the research I’ve come across

[TL;DR at the bottom]

So firstly, we have to look at our conclusive evidence, from which we’ll base our theory/headcanon on, which can mainly be found in the Creating a Champion book, and some dialogue in game. I’ve compiled them all in these bullets here

Zora children are around 20ish years old [as said by dialogue with Finley in her love letter sidequest, I don’t have a screenshot but please just take my word for it]

150ish is considered middle-aged for Zora

Muzu is around 4 centuries old

Curved claws, weathered fins, and worn noses are signs of an older Zora that is more than 3 centuries(ish) old

Zora that were friends with Link must be around 150ish (not just 100), since you need to also account for the 20+ years of growing from a child stage, to the more normal sized form that you see them in the game, ergo, it’s that age plus the 100 years stasis that we determine the “middle age” of around 150

150 is the middle age, double that for the average old age of 300 years, but I say it could go to 400 too for additional reasons I’ll explain later with examples with my final age system. Anyhow, Muzu is around 400 if you take the 100 years for actually growing up from childhood, additional 100+ years of holding a different job as I doubt you just straight out hire a councilman without experience, and then another century for where he first started working in in the council, training Mipha, which would overlap with the period of the pre and post Great Calamity and Link’s return, meaning that’s 3 centuries plus 50ish years if we’re being generous with the overlap. This would help line up with the “for over a century” line as that doesn’t quite mean 2 centuries of working in the council, but Muzu is definitely getting up there to 4 centuries for his age alone

Now, I thought, this was gonna be my breakthrough, this screenshot here, depicting the traits of the older Zora. The elderly Zora are probably around 3 centuries old (since King Dorephan said they were young men around Mipha’s time, 150ish+100 gives us the range of 250-300), so I was like “Oh l can look at the size of their fins and noses and head/tail things and find a more efficient way to find their age” but nOPE. There is very little variation in that ballpark, the Zora either have exaggerated weathered noses or nice and shiny fins and no in between. The size of their head fins are roughly the same, with again, the only exaggerated differences being with the King and Sidon which doesn’t help at all because the Royal Zora already have a bunch of other difference such as their SIZE to name one.

I even went to the part about their curved toes, which initially would line up with some other Zora like Muzu

And let me tell you

I’ve looked at their toes

This is them from a child, a middle-aged, and an elderly. Color doesn’t matter and the curve? Well there’s

BARELY A DIFFERENCE

At least not nearly enough to find an efficient way to find age. Even Muzu’s final model didn’t have the exaggerated curvature as seen in the book.

I looked at their tail tail fins, (not the tail on their head, but their actual small rounded tail fin by their butts) because the book also mentioned how the grown Zora have more pronounced tail fins compared to the kids, but it was the same for the 150s and the 300s sooo not that helpful

So I kept digging. In the book I found that King Dorephan was crowned around 100 years before the game started. In addition I reread the 10 Zora stone monuments and found that he had killed a Guardian with his bare hands and thrown it off a cliff, which he still had a scar from.

[and yes I attempted to find his definitive age by seeing how long it takes for a scar to fade but I gave up cause Zora anatomy is too different to find a conclusive answer]

So I was like, “ok Dorephan had to have been around 150 when he came to the throne, then 50 years later the guardians are excavated giving way to the story about the guardian...” blah blah blahbla I even went to the supposed site where that guardian was, but it all didn’t really give me that much more info than what I already knew. I was researching ways to age the rock monuments from visuals alone which needless to say is pretty impossible, so I gave up on finding Dorephan’s age and I kept digging.

All I wanted was something physical that could properly give way to identifying a Zora’s age was that too much to ask???

Now this is where I had all but given up, it seems that my only answer was this vague note about how their fins move up when they grow

Which, to be fair, held true when I looked at the in-game character models myself, but I can’t exactly pixel measure these things for each Zora.

But THAT’S where the revelation came. I was so focused on finding inconsistencies within the elderly Zora, when I should have been looking at the young baby ones. See, this pictures, literally right next to the page about elderly Zora that I was analyzing for ages, is the key to it all

Now, I was thinking about the rings on a tree, and certain species of banded fish that grow and discard different markings as they grow older, I even counted the neck rings on certain Zora to see if they did that thing where they add a ring for each birthday like some African and Asian cultures do (look it up, that stuff’s pretty interesting!) and that is where it struck me.

Count how many luminescent markings are on their head

The males have 11, the females have 8 (on the one side, the other side has the same number of dots but for simplicity purposes I’m doing one side)

Now let’s count for these Zoras, who are middle aged-ish

The male has 10, the female has 7.

Now let’s look at the oldest Zora that we know of

3 dots above the eye, four on the tail. Muzu that motherfucker has 7 damn dots and I couldn’t be happier.

MY DUDES, GALS, AND PALS THIS IS IT, I’VE CHECKED AND DOUBLE CHECKED WITH NEARLY EVERY ZORA I COULD AND THE NUMBER OF LUMINESCENT MARKINGS ON THEIR HEAD CORRESPONDS WITH THE AMOUNT OF CENTURIES THEY’VE LIVED, LITERALLY AND FIGURATIVELY DOWN TO THE DOT

First we have Muzu, who as I’ve preciously stated is around 4 centuries old. 11-4? Oh, it’s seven, and that’s the amount of markings he has? OOoo??

How about this Zora Lady who recognized Link from 100 years ago?

Seven dots? 8-7 is 1 so shes just over one century which lines up timeline wise. You can even see how the third dot is slowing shrinking on her head so she’s coming up on 2 centuries

Ok how about the elders?

NINE. 11-9 is 2 centuries, with again, the dot by their head shrinking significantly showing how they’re getting up on 3 centuries.

The part I circled in green there is jewelry, not a marking, however this only goes further to prove my point. What better way to appear youthful than to have jewelry that makes it look like you have more markings than you have, made with luminous stone, no less.

This guy? Seggin? Super close to 4 centuries, those dots are fading away fast. Count your days old timer

Random dude that doesn’t recognize Link but is an new apprentice for sculpture making? 10 dots, a fresh 1 century pal, lookin young

I was a feral child running across the Domain screaming people’s ages in their face like a rude, naive, brat, I was elated to say the least. Especially since this system even works on the King himself

[plus one dot slightly behind the fin here...]

King Dorephan has 7 dots, he’s 400 years old. Which still lines up timeline wise, especially since he’s similar age with Muzu who he has stated is one of his most trusted advisors, beecaaaaaaaause of the years they’ve spent working together the timelines match uppppppp

This system works for almost all Zora, with 2 exceptions. Guards have helmets that cover their markings, so it’s impossible to tell. In addition, Prince Sidon, has sixteen lights on this hammerhead because he’s fancy like that (we already know he’s canonically 2ish centuries old anyhow from the DLC)

EDIT: I WAS WRONG THIS WORKS FOR SIDON TOO. The sixteen markings I was referring to was actually the amount of marking on each side of the head total, however if we look at the markings for only one side, like intended

Ten dots, Sidon’s over 100 years old. I’d say he’s closer to 150 given the timeline

Essentially, the most surefire way to find almost any Zora’s age is to identify a male or female Zora, count the number of lights on the side of their head/tail thing, then subtract from 11 if they’re a male, and from 8 for a female. The number left is how many centuries they’ve lived. You can check to see if their markings are shrinking and fading to get a sense if they’re coming up on the next century anytime soon. Comparing this with the oldest Zora we see in game, we can conclusively say that the Zora lifespan is around 3 to 4 centuries since no Zora has been seen with less than seven markings

Now go and make your Zora ocs with your appropriate number of lights. I’m gonna have a cookie

#botw #breath of the wild #legend of zelda botw #loz botw #zora #zora botw #botw theory #botw headcanon #no fuck that this IS canon

964 notes · View notes

luxekook · 4 years

Text

in too deep ☼ knj

☼ dedication: this fic is a bday present for the loml tay aka tay bay bay aka @interludemoonchild!!!! luv u long time <33 (sorry this isn’t about hobi skksksks)

☼ pairing: marine biologist namjoon x assistant reader

☼ genre: idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, crack

☼ summary: you had always grown up being told tales of terrible jobs with tyrannical bosses. but now, you’re left to wonder why you hadn’t heard more tragic stories of all-too-wonderful jobs with all-too-beautiful bosses... did falling for your boss only lead to heartbreak and a two weeks’ notice? or could it yield the possibility of romance?

☼ word count: 3.1k

☼ warnings: pg15, cursing, chaotic energy, pining, miscommunication, mentions of quitting, lots of sea nerd stuff, namjoon is smart af but an idiot in love, the reader isn’t any better, crabby bois, arguments, completely cheesy fluff, short make out sesh, mention of sex

☼ banner creator: heathy bby @shadowsremedy

☼ beta reader: the amazing and astoundingly talented phia @meowxyoong

“Kim Namjoon!” You cry, swatting the blue-clawed crab away from your feet with a broom, “What did I tell you about bringing your goddamn crustaceans into the office?”

The man in question hustles out of his office looking disheveled, “You’ve seen Carl?” He sinks right down to his hands and knees to peer under your desk. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you, little buddy!”

You stare disappointedly as your boss picks up ‘Carl’ from his hiding place and cradles him to his chest. “Namjoon,” You sigh exasperatedly, folding your arms.

He looks up at you and blushes, “Sorry, Star. I just feel so bad leaving them downstairs at the lab. It’s so lonely and dark down there.”

While your stomach flips at the mention of his nickname for you, your eyebrows furrow in confusion, “Well, why don’t you just stay down there with them?”

“Because you’re up here…” He mumbles something incoherent.

“What?” You lean forwards, your ears straining to catch the garbled syllables.

Namjoon clears his throat, looking everywhere but at you, “Because it’s nicer up here.”

“Don’t tell your investors that,” You laugh, thinking of all the fancy and shiny equipment housed in the aquatics lab a few floors below. Working for a top-tier marine biologist sure had its perks - namely the state of the art kitchen with a full espresso bar.

“Star, I would never!” He looks affronted by the mere mention of such a thing. “Now, apologize to Carl for scaring him.”

You scoff, but just one glance into Namjoon’s sparkling brown eyes makes you crumble instantly. “Fine,” You begrudgingly shoot the crab a look, “Sorry, Carl.”

“See, Carl?” Namjoon croons, “She’s sorry!” As he turns back to you, you can immediately tell he is about to launch into Marine Biologist Mode™.

“Carl is a blue crab - a Callinectes sapidus, to be precise. That scientific name literally means ‘savory beautiful swimmer’.”

“Savory, huh?” You quip, relishing in the scandalized look Namjoon shoots you.

“Don’t listen to her, Carl,” He whispers, stroking a finger gently down the crab’s shell. “Now, where was I? Ah, yes… He’s named for his pretty sapphire-tinted claws, and he’s one of the most harvested species of his kind. So, don’t even think about it.”

You burst out laughing as he eyes you, “Okay, Joon, I’ll leave my pot of boiling water at home.”

Namjoon splutters out a choked laugh, looking at you like you are the most exasperating thing he’s ever come across. And, you probably are.

When you came to work for the distinguished marine biologist four months ago, you found him literally buried beneath piles of research papers, files, and National Geographic magazines. Apparently, he had tripped into his filing cabinet and everything had fallen off of the shelves onto him. The man had been a right mess. It was no wonder he had put an ad out in search of an assistant.

In your new role, you slowly but surely introduced some structure and organization into Namjoon’s life as best you could. The first thing you did was update his office. The man still had an honest to god lava lamp on his desk. You were still baffled at how he had managed not to break the fixture before your arrival.

Swiftly following the disposal of the cursed lava lamp, you ordered new file cabinets - and had them nailed to the wall. Virtually, you did even more. You restructured his online platforms and updated his schedule to include more than just scattered notes like “Meeting at 10AM, i think? Or was it 10PM?”

To his credit, Namjoon adhered to most of your suggestions and changes, but apparently he still refused to grasp the ‘no creatures in the office’ rule.

Overall, Namjoon was a great boss - kind, understanding, sweet, and a tad eccentric. His love for all things sea-related shone through the gentle way he handled his specimens, the passionate tone of voice he used while speaking on any related topic, and the stars in his eyes at the mere mention of discovering a new species.

It had been all too easy to become infatuated with him. Especially when he called you “Star” and left you to interpret the meaning on your own.

You remember the exact moment that you fell in love with him so vividly. It had been last month, just three months into working for him. Namjoon had been going off about fucking sand of all things.

“…Sand speaks of history, of science, of travels. Each grain of sand holds thousands upon thousands of years of movement, of erosion. For example, the beach outside of this building is tan because of the iron oxide tinting the quartz and the feldspar to a light brown color. But, there are other beaches that are black, white and even pink in color! It’s fascinating! And to quote the goddess of marine biology Rachel Carson: "In every curving beach, in every grain of sand, there is a story of the Earth…”

Yeah, you are head over heels for your boss. And that’s why you needed to quit.

The end of the workday arrives too quickly - a common theme it seems when you love what you do and who you work for. Namjoon walks beside you down to the parking lot. You sneak a glance at his face and note that he seems deep in thought.

Your mind slips to the image of you and Namjoon going home together to a shared house overrun with fish tanks and models of sharks. It’s all too easy to picture, and all too painful to acknowledge the impossibility.

“Star,” Namjoon’s voice jolts you from your fantasy. You blink up at him, realizing you’re both stopped beside your adjacent cars. Namjoon smiles at you, “I’ll see you tomorrow? It’ll be Friday, finally...”

It seems like he wants to say more but stops himself for some reason. You pause, waiting for him to continue, but he just blushes and brings a hand to the back of his neck bashfully.

“Yeah, Friday,” Your tone is less enthusiastic. You planned to hand in your two weeks’ notice tomorrow. It’s a complete strategy on your part so that you can have the whole weekend to cry and shove at least one gallon of ice cream down your throat.

You wave goodbye to each other and enter your respective cars. You watch Namjoon pull out of the parking lot before you and pause to rest your forehead on your steering wheel. You were so screwed.

Twenty-four exhausting hours later, you find yourself with your fist poised over Namjoon’s wooden office door. Are you actually doing this? Are you really going to quit the only job you’d ever loved?

Yes, you are. You love Namjoon too much to stay here surrounded by his charisma and his beauty. You love him too much to try to complicate his workspace, his sacred ground. You love him too much to ask him to blur the lines of colleague and lover.

You need to leave - for his sake and for yours. It isn’t like he still needs you. He has been following your routine with vigor and always keeps his office organized now. Your tasks have been dwindling for weeks.

It’s time to move on. God, even the tension today had been off the charts with you and Namjoon skirting around each other like you were both walking on eggshells. Clearly, he is also feeling like you are in the way.

With that in mind, you straighten your shoulders and finally knock on the door.

Your ears strain for any sign of an answer. Your breath catches in your throat as you try to sustain the meager amount of courage you had mustered up inside you. Twisting open the handle, you push the door open and are immediately met with an empty office. Damn, he must be downstairs.

You chuckle at the sheer idiocy of your panicked state over knocking on an empty office door.

This is perfect anyways. You can hand Namjoon your two weeks’ and then evacuate the building in one sweep. Shutting down your computer and grabbing your things, you trudge out of the room and towards the stairs.

The journey downwards seems akin to walking the plank as you take each step slowly, dreading the inevitable.

Ciara has it all wrong: you do not love it when you One, Two Step.

The entrance to the lab looms overhead. The steel double doors look more like the gateway to hell rather than a nice entrance to a marine facility. You don’t break your stride as you march through the doors. If you had, you might not have kept going.

The familiar light humming of the tank filters meets your ears as you peer around the rows of shelves containing colorful fish and scuttling critters.

“Joon?” You call, the nickname slipping past your lips before you can stop it.

“Back here, Star!” His answer sounds from the very back of the lab. Of course, that’s where the crabs are housed.

You make your way past the tanks of clownfish and the pools of stingrays to where Namjoon sits hunched over the shallow tank containing four green-tinted crabs.

“That’s it, Nala.” Namjoon croons as the smallest of the four crabs swims around the tank, “You show your brothers how fast you are.”

“Talking to your subjects again, boss?” You can’t help but tease the man you've grown to love as he fawns over his work.

Namjoon blushes slightly and nods, pushing his glasses up to rest on the bridge of his nose, “Studies have shown that it helps them develop.”

“I thought that was humans?” You say, shifting your weight back and forth. The letter in your hand seems to burn more each second you hold onto it. You couldn't take it anymore.

As Namjoon opens his mouth to reply, you thrust the letter into his chest and say, “Never mind. This is for you. Please read it later.”

With that, you fast-walk your way back to the entrance of the lab. The sound of the envelope tearing open only forces you faster. Fuck, it had been idiotic of you to assume that he would actually listen to you and open it later. Namjoon is as impatient as they come. Of course he wouldn't wait.

“Star!” His strangled call startles you, “What is this?”

“We can talk about it on Monday!” You reply, somehow already close to tears. Why is this godforsaken lab so big? You pace down the aisles of tanks and breathe a sigh of relief as the exit comes into view.

Then, Namjoon comes barreling around the corner, cutting off your escape. The man looks baffled as he clutches your written resignation in his hands. His chest heaves as he holds the torn pages out towards you, “What. Is. This. Star?”

You bristle. I guess we’re doing this now, you thought. Stiffening your shoulders, you muster all the false bravado you can manage, “It’s my two weeks’ notice, Namjoon. I’m sure a smart guy like you can read.”

“Okay, allow me to rephrase,” Namjoon stalks towards you, tossing the crumpled letter over his shoulder. “Why did you give me this?”

“The letter explains everything,” Your eyes dart around, both in search of a viable escape and in avoidance of his intensity.

“Sure it does,” He scoffs, his eyes blazing with disbelief. “I want to hear it from you.”

Your back hits the cool glass of the tank behind you. You’re trapped between the contrasting temperatures of the water and Namjoon’s body.

“Joon,” Your voice shakes, “You don’t need me anymore. You’ve done everything I've asked of you and then some. You’re organized. You’re on time. You’re put together. I barely have enough tasks now to fill a day, let alone a week. It’s time to move on.”

“Time to move on?” Namjoon echoes before barking out a humorless laugh, “I don’t need you anymore? That’s really what you think, Star?”

“Don’t call me that.” The nickname snufs out any trace of fight left inside you, and you plead, “Just let me go, Joon.”

“Never,” He growls.

“I don’t understand what you’re not getting,” You sigh, exasperated and drained, “You’ve surpassed my expectations and erased the need for my position. I think the saying ‘the student has become the master’ applies here.”

Namjoon gapes at you before he snaps, “You’re the one who’s not getting it! Have you ever considered that the student might just be in love with the teacher?”

Joon rakes a hand through his hair as you become the one to gape open mouthed at the frustrated man.

He continues, “I wake up earlier every damn day because I can’t wait to see you at work. I organize all of my things because I just want to see you smile at me when you notice. I spend an hour each night picking out what to wear the next day because I want to impress you… Don’t you see? Everything I do is for you, is because of you. I want to be the best version of myself for you.”

Your mind struggles to compute the seemingly impossible notion that the object of your affections returns your love. “Did you,” You gasp out, “Just say that you loved me?”

“Yes, you complete jellyfish! I love you. I am in love with you! And it’s not like it’s not obvious! I call you ‘Star’ because you are my starfish, my sea star. You are the one who keeps the balance to my ecosystem of chaos. You are the key species that keeps everything afloat.”

“And you thought that was obvious?” You yell back at him, “How on earth would I immediately have known the intense analysis behind your nickname for me, Namjoon the science buffoon?” You huff, scrambling to process the amount of information that had just been thrown at you.

He needed you?

He loved you back?

He nicknamed you after a fucking marine invertebrate?!

Namjoon blinks in surprise, “Did you just insult me with a Bill Nye pun?” You don’t deign to give him a response. Namjoon chuckles before grinning sheepishly, “Okay, fine. You make a good point.”

“I know I do,” You pout. “You can’t just spring this on me, Joon. Why haven't you told me this before?”

“Because I was nervous that you would leave me, that you wouldn't return my feelings. Obviously, the first point is moot. What about the second?”

“You’re asking if I love you back?” Your body sags against the tank behind you, “How could I not, you crab-loving, walking mess of a—”

Namjoon captures your mouth with his, kissing you with fervor. His hands wind their way up to cradle your face between them like you are the most precious thing to him.

Pulling back slightly, Namjoon rasps out, “So, you’ll stay?”

“Hm, I don’t know,” You crack a wry smile, “What’s in it for me?”

“Well, let me show you,” Namjoon replies before whipping his shirt off. You gape open mouthed at the expanse of beautiful tan skin in front of you.

Was that a hint of a tattoo swirling over his left shoulder?

He reaches down to tug at the hem of your dress, insinuating he wants it off. A nice concept in theory; however, with one look around at your surroundings, you slap his hand away. “Namjoon! Not in front of the fish!”

“But, Star, these aren’t fish! These are squid, and they are classed as cephalopods—”

You put a hand over his mouth, “Allow me to clarify: I will only fuck in a creature-free zone.”

Namjoon murmurs something beneath your palm. You give him a warning look before removing your hand. He immediately repeats himself, “My office?”

Your eyes narrow, “I know for a fact you have at least three crabs in there.”

Namjoon pauses, looking suspiciously shifty, “There are only seven…”

You wait for it.

“...teen.” He finishes.

“Kim Namjoon!”

Two Years Later

The short walk down the aisle ends too quickly as you find yourself standing in front of a teary-eyed Namjoon. Five of his friends stand behind him in a row, while the sixth stands proudly as the officiant.

They really are out here looking like a whole boy band, you muse. But, you only have eyes for their leader.

Namjoon stands before you, all tall and handsome in his tux; and as Officiant Jin™ begins the ceremony, you can't help but wonder how you got so lucky.

Finally, the ring exchange is introduced dramatically by Seokjin who spouts something about circles and never ending love. “Let us now have the rings brought forward and presented by the ring-bearer!” He booms, raising his arms up like he is summoning a great force.

Ring-bearer? You rake your mind for a prior mention of a ring-bearer… You thought Yoongi as the best man would have the rings.

Suddenly, Namjoon produces a silver whistle from his pocket and blows it once. You stare at your soon-to-be husband like he has sprouted another head.

And then you hear it: the sound of legs and claws scuttling across the floor towards the altar.

“Tell me that is not what I think it is,” You whisper-yell over to Namjoon, who looks way too pleased for your liking.

Your fears and exasperations come true as Namjoon swoops down to pick up Carl who has two shiny rings tied to his shell with a ribbon.

“Oh, Kim Namjoon,” You sigh as you watch him remove the rings from Carl and hand the crab off to a disgruntled Taehyung, “What am I going to do with you?”

“You’re going to marry me,” Namjoon grins.

And marry him you did.

a/n: jellyfish have no brains, lolz. idk why making joon call the reader a jellyfish made me crack tf up but IT DID.

#bangtanhq #ficswithluv #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #hyunglinenetwork #kwritersworldnet #bangtanarmynet #btsbookclub #btsnoonanet #hyungsmutsociety #maknaesmutsociety #bangtanscenery #kim namjoon x reader #namjoon x reader #knj x reader #bts #namjoon fanfic #bts fanfic #happy bday tay!!!!!

722 notes · View notes

auroraluciferi · 3 years

Link

if anyone in this time of deep concern of his health is interested about what a worthless piece of shit Prince Philip is, here is a very brief list of 90 racist, sexist, and incredibly ignorant things the man has said in the last century:

1. "Ghastly." Prince Philip's opinion of Beijing, during a 1986 tour of China.

2. "Ghastly." Prince Philip's opinion of Stoke-on-Trent, as offered to the city's Labour MP Joan Walley at Buckingham Palace in 1997.

3. "Deaf? If you're near there, no wonder you are deaf." Said to a group of deaf children standing near a Caribbean steel drum band in 2000.

4. "If you stay here much longer, you will go home with slitty eyes." To 21-year-old British student Simon Kerby during a visit to China in 1986.

5. "You managed not to get eaten then?" To a British student who had trekked in Papua New Guinea, during an official visit in 1998.

6. "You can't have been here that long – you haven't got a pot belly." To a British tourist during a tour of Budapest in Hungary. 1993.

7. "How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?" Asked of a Scottish driving instructor in 1995.

8. "Damn fool question!" To BBC journalist Caroline Wyatt at a banquet at the Elysée Palace after she asked Queen Elizabeth if she was enjoying her stay in Paris in 2006.

9. "It looks as though it was put in by an Indian." The Prince's verdict of a fuse box during a tour of a Scottish factory in August 1999. He later clarified his comment: "I meant to say cowboys. "I just got my cowboys and Indians mixed up."

10. "People usually say that after a fire it is water damage that is the worst. We are still drying out Windsor Castle." To survivors of the Lockerbie bombings in 1993.

11. "We don't come here for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves." During a trip to Canada in 1976.

12. "A few years ago, everybody was saying we must have more leisure, everyone's working too much. Now that everybody's got more leisure time they are complaining they are unemployed. People don't seem to make up their minds what they want." A man of the people shares insight into the recession that gripped Britain in 1981.

13. "British women can't cook." Winning the hearts of the Scottish Women's Institute in 1961.

14. "It was part of the fortunes of war. We didn't have counsellors rushing around every time somebody let off a gun, asking 'Are you all right - are you sure you don't have a ghastly problem?' You just got on with it!" On the issue of stress counselling for servicemen in a TV documentary marking the 50th Anniversary of V-J Day in 1995.

15. "What do you gargle with – pebbles?" To Tom Jones, after the Royal Variety Performance, 1969. He added the following day: "It is very difficult at all to see how it is possible to become immensely valuable by singing what I think are the most hideous songs."

16. "It's a vast waste of space." Philip entertained guests in 2000 at the reception of a new £18m British Embassy in Berlin, which the Queen had just opened.

17. "There's a lot of your family in tonight." After glancing at business chief Atul Patel's name badge during a 2009 Buckingham Palace reception for 400 influential British Indians to meet the Royal couple.

18. "If it has four legs and it is not a chair, if it has got two wings and it flies but is not an aeroplane and if it swims and it is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it." Said to a World Wildlife Fund meeting in 1986.

19. "You ARE a woman, aren't you?" To a woman in Kenya in 1984, after accepting a gift.

20. "Do you know they have eating dogs for the anorexic now?" To a wheelchair-bound Susan Edwards, and her guide dog Natalie in 2002.

21. "Get me a beer. I don't care what kind it is, just get me a beer!" On being offered the finest Italian wines by PM Giuliano Amato at a dinner in Rome in 2000.

22. "I would like to go to Russia very much – although the bastards murdered half my family." In 1967, asked if he would like to visit the Soviet Union.

23. "If a cricketer, for instance, suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, which he could do very easily, I mean, are you going to ban cricket bats?" In a Radio 4 interview shortly after the Dunblane shootings in 1996. He said to the interviewer off-air afterwards: "That will really set the cat among the pigeons, won't it?"

24. "Oh, it's you that owns that ghastly car is it? We often see it when driving to Windsor Castle." To neighbour Elton John after hearing he had sold his Watford FC-themed Aston Martin in 2001.

25. "The problem with London is the tourists. They cause the congestion. If we could just stop the tourism, we could stop the congestion." At the opening of City Hall in 2002.

26. "A pissometer?" The Prince sees the renames the piezometer water gauge demonstrated by Australian farmer Steve Filelti in 2000.

27. "Don't feed your rabbits pawpaw fruit – it acts as a contraceptive. Then again, it might not work on rabbits." Giving advice to a Caribbean rabbit breeder in Anguilla in 1994.

28. "You must be out of your minds." To Solomon Islanders, on being told that their population growth was 5 per cent a year, in 1982.

29. "Young people are the same as they always were. They are just as ignorant." At the 50th anniversary of the Duke of Edinburgh Awards scheme.

30. "Your country is one of the most notorious centres of trading in endangered species." Accepting a conservation award in Thailand in 1991.

31. "Aren't most of you descended from pirates?" In the Cayman Islands, 1994.

32. "You bloody silly fool!" To an elderly car park attendant who made the mistake of not recognising him at Cambridge University in 1997.

33. "Oh! You are the people ruining the rivers and the environment." To three young employees of a Scottish fish farm at Holyrood Palace in 1999.

34. "If you travel as much as we do you appreciate the improvements in aircraft design of less noise and more comfort – provided you don't travel in something called economy class, which sounds ghastly." To the Aircraft Research Association in 2002.

35. "The French don't know how to cook breakfast." After a breakfast of bacon, eggs, smoked salmon, kedgeree, croissants and pain au chocolat – from Gallic chef Regis Crépy – in 2002.

36. "And what exotic part of the world do you come from?" Asked in 1999 of Tory politician Lord Taylor of Warwick, whose parents are Jamaican. He replied: "Birmingham."

37. "Oh no, I might catch some ghastly disease." On a visit to Australia in 1992, when asked if he wanted to stroke a koala bear.

38. "It doesn't look like much work goes on at this University." Overheard at Bristol University's engineering facility. It had been closed so that he and the Queen could officially open it in 2005.

39. "I wish he'd turn the microphone off!" The Prince expresses his opinion of Elton John's performance at the 73rd Royal Variety Show, 2001.

40. "Do you still throw spears at each other?" Prince Philip shocks Aboriginal leader William Brin at the Aboriginal Cultural Park in Queensland, 2002.

41. "Where's the Southern Comfort?" On being presented with a hamper of southern goods by the American ambassador in London in 1999.

42. "Were you here in the bad old days? ... That's why you can't read and write then!" To parents during a visit to Fir Vale Comprehensive School in Sheffield, which had suffered poor academic reputation.

43. "Ah you're the one who wrote the letter. So you can write then? Ha, ha! Well done." Meeting 14-year old George Barlow, whose invited to the Queen to visit Romford, Essex, in 2003.

44. "So who's on drugs here?... HE looks as if he's on drugs." To a 14-year-old member of a Bangladeshi youth club in 2002.

45. "You could do with losing a little bit of weight." To hopeful astronaut, 13-year-old Andrew Adams.

46. "You have mosquitoes. I have the Press." To the matron of a hospital in the Caribbean in 1966.

47. "The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined." While hosts made effort to greet a state visit to Brazil, 1968.

48. "During the Blitz a lot of shops had their windows blown in and sometimes they put up notices saying, 'More open than usual.' I now declare this place more open than usual." Unveiling a plaque at the University of Hertfordshire's new Hatfield campus in November 2003.

49 . Philip: "Who are you?"

Simon Kelner: "I'm the editor-in-chief of The Independent, Sir."

Philip: "What are you doing here?"

Kelner: "You invited me."

Philip: "Well, you didn't have to come!"

An exchange at a press reception to mark the Golden Jubilee in 2002.

50. "No, I would probably end up spitting it out over everybody." Prince Philip declines the offer of some fish from Rick Stein's seafood deli in 2000.

51. "Any bloody fool can lay a wreath at the thingamy." Discussing his role in an interview with Jeremy Paxman.

52. "Holidays are curious things, aren't they? You send children to school to get them out of your hair. Then they come back and make life difficult for parents. That is why holidays are set so they are just about the limit of your endurance." At the opening of a school in 2000.

53. "People think there's a rigid class system here, but dukes have even been known to marry chorus girls. Some have even married Americans." In 2000.

54. "Can you tell the difference between them?" On being told by President Obama that he'd had breakfast with the leaders of the UK, China and Russia.

55. "I don't know how they are going to integrate in places like Glasgow and Sheffield." After meeting students from Brunei coming to Britain to study in 1998.

56. "Do people trip over you?" Meeting a wheelchair-bound nursing-home resident in 2002.

57. "That's a nice tie... Do you have any knickers in that material?" Discussing the tartan designed for the Papal visit with then-Scottish Tory leader Annabel Goldie last year.

58. "I have never been noticeably reticent about talking on subjects about which I know nothing." Addressing a group of industrialists in 1961.

59. "It's not a very big one, but at least it's dead and it took an awful lot of killing!" Speaking about a crocodile he shot in Gambia in 1957.

60. "Well, you didn't design your beard too well, did you? You really must try better with your beard." To a young fashion designer at a Buckingham Palace in 2009.

61. "So you're responsible for the kind of crap Channel Four produces!" Speaking to then chairman of the channel, Michael Bishop, in 1962.

62. "Dontopedalogy is the science of opening your mouth and putting your foot in it, a science which I have practiced for a good many years." Address to the General Dental Council, quoted in Time in 1960.

63. "Tolerance is the one essential ingredient ... You can take it from me that the Queen has the quality of tolerance in abundance." Advice for a successful marriage in 1997.

64. "I never see any home cooking – all I get is fancy stuff." Commiserating about the standard of Buckingham Palace cuisine in 1962.

65. "I suppose I would get in a lot of trouble if I were to melt them down." On being shown Nottingham Forest FC's trophy collection in 1999.

66. "It makes you all look like Dracula's daughters!" To pupils at Queen Anne's School in Reading, who wear blood-red uniforms, in 1998.

67. "I don't think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but they are doing the same thing." Dismissing claims that those who sell slaughtered meat have greater moral authority than those who participate in blood sports, in 1988.

68. "Ah, so this is feminist corner then." Joining a group of female Labour MPs, who were wearing name badges reading "Ms", at a Buckingham Palace drinks party in 2000.

69. "Cats kill far more birds than men. Why don't you have a slogan: 'Kill a cat and save a bird?'" On being told of a project to protect turtle doves in Anguilla in 1965.

70. "All money nowadays seems to be produced with a natural homing instinct for the Treasury." Bemoaning the rate of British tax in 1963.

71. "It is my invariable custom to say something flattering to begin with so that I shall be excused if by any chance I put my foot in it later on." Full marks for honesty, from a speech in 1956.

72. "Why don't you go and live in a hostel to save cash?" Asked of a penniless student.

73. "In education, if in nothing else, the Scotsman knows what is best for him. Indeed, only a Scotsman can really survive a Scottish education." Said when he was made Chancellor of Edinburgh University in November 1953.

74. "If it doesn't fart or eat hay, she isn't interested." Of his daughter, Princess Anne.

75. "They're not mating are they?" Spotting two robots bumping in to one another at the Science Museum in 2000.

76. "I must be in the only person in Britain glad to see the back of that plane." Philip did not approve of the noise Concorde made while flying over the Buckingham Palace.

77. "The only active sport, which I follow, is polo – and most of the work's done by the pony!" 1965

78. "It looks like a tart's bedroom." On seeing plans for the Duke and then Duchess of York's house at Sunninghill Park.

79. "Reichskanzler." Prince Philip used Hitler's title to address German chancellor Helmut Kohl during a speech in Hanover in 1997.

80. "We go into the red next year... I shall probably have to give up polo." Comment on US television in 1969 about the Royal Family's finances.

81. "Bugger the table plan, give me my dinner!" Showing his impatience to be fed at a dinner party in 2004.

82. "I thought it was against the law these days for a woman to solicit." Said to a woman solicitor.

83. "You're just a silly little Whitehall twit: you don't trust me and I don't trust you." Said to Sir Rennie Maudslay, Keeper of the Privy Purse, in the 1970s.

84. "What about Tom Jones? He's made a million and he's a bloody awful singer." Response to a comment at a small-business lunch about how difficult it is in Britain to get rich.

85. "This could only happen in a technical college." On getting stuck in a lift between two floors at the Heriot Watt University, 1958.

86. "I'd much rather have stayed in the Navy, frankly." When asked what he felt about his life in 1992.

87. "It looks like the kind of thing my daughter would bring back from her school art lessons" On being shown "primitive" Ethiopian art in 1965.

88. "You're not wearing mink knickers, are you?" Philip charms fashion writer Serena French at a World Wildlife Fund gathering in 1993.

89. "My son...er...owns them." On being asked on a Canadian tour whether he knew the Scilly Isles.

90. "Well, that's more than you know about anything else then." Speaking, a touch condescendingly, to Michael Buerk, after being told by the BBC newsreader that he did know about the Duke of Edinburgh's Gold Awards in 2004.

#uk #united kingdom #royal #royals #prince philip #queen elizabeth #meghan markle #prince harry #corruption #racism #sexism #monarchy #seriously #what planet do you live on

24 notes · View notes

daonepiece · 3 years

Note

Hey you precious little cute artist chwan! Its me from heaven! You know the cause of this. That Sanji art... how could you make it so freaking amazing? Do you know how people will die seeing it? Have you ever wondered how creative you are? Do you even know how blessed we are to have you in this community? I blushed like an idiot looking at him.

Talking about the Sanji art, why was it so perfect? I need you to explain for making him exceptionally Gorgeous. The concept... how did you get the concept of All Green and now you are making it my obsession. How did you come up with it? Damn that was so creative. I became crazy over that Idea. Im in love... in love... with you and also Sanji. Thanks for making that art. From next time don't forget to keep your signature. I don't want people to steal your art.

Eeeeeeee you keep spoiling me afhjkas hehehe what am I gonna do I’m about to explode >///w///<

So, you wanna talk about thought process? I’d LOVE to! Please prepare to hear me gushing about it. It gonna be veeeryyyy looonggg ( ◕▿◕ )

Since Sanji was the first one to be designed, I was nervous at everything *wobbling novice sea witch at your service 👍* The first step is to choose what kind of fish. I like marine life but I didn’t like them that much to know more than a few common name. Initially I thought of dolphin, since they are very smart, and also a lil perv... And they blow clouds of water when they surface to breath, like someone’s smoking! So I started doing research to select a fitting species.

But while I was reading through various dolphin descriptions, two words caught my attention: FAST SWIMMER. I was like, wait who’s the fastest in the ocean??? So my research had come to a swift turning point, I abandoned the dolphin list to go through articles of “fastest fish in the world” instead. That’s where I found out about the Black Marlin. Things clicked in place even faster than Sanji’s Diable Jambe 😆

The second step is to choose what he would wear, I just knew it had to be a white poet shirt, because Sanji. 👀 Took a few more look at the royal family attire and I was like, “yup! poet shirt and waist band, flowy flowy in the sea, seal the deal!” (you can see that in the initial sketch) This soon went through more changes, but at later stage.

The third step is to choose the vibe, setting, pose he’d be in. 3 words stuck with me whenever I think of Sanji: sadness (you could say he’s feeling blue, you know?, blue! 🤓), curiosity, and dream. So here we had pre-timeskip Sanji, maybe even a bit younger, the viewpoint going up, Sanji looking up too, like how one kept wondering about the strange world above but couldn’t go there, stuck in the depth of the ocean. Adding a book because he’s definitely a nerd! It’s supposed to be a cookbook or the encyclopedia of devil fruits. The fourth step is lining. Troubles ensued! Lots of! The pose was haaarddd and I just couldn’t get the shirt hem to look right, it didn’t flow like I wanted, the tail design seemed bland, also his hair bang wanted to make me an enemy... I struggled, and the clock was ticking fast! So of course I did what an impatient one like me always do: Change the hard part. I got rid of the flowy hem, decided to tuck it neatly in a leather-like band, eased up the pose, switched to post-timeskip design, enlarged the fins for dramatic effect, in the first place there were a line of diamond shape running along his tail (the part that helps a fish sense water pressure and stuffs, if I remember correctly), I turned that into Sanji’s swirls as well. The chosen book in the end was “Noland the Liar” because I wanted to slip in a mer!Noland and see if anyone would notice hehe.. Strings at collar and waist was added last as an attempt to balance the amount of black and white on character. Background was simply a bunch of water flows and bubbles, I tried to portray a fast current, hushing our boy to swim away, back to safe home. The final silhouette and line of action wasn’t as nice as the sketch’s, but I’m not picky. *laziness will overwrite everything*

Finally, we crawled to the step I dreaded the most: coloring and shading... The tone was dark blue, giving of an even more ominous feeling I suppose? The next was this agonizing process of making the first thing to caught your eyes is his face, or better, his eyes, but definitely not his butt. TT_TT The black area was so strong, at one point I considered giving the (now blue) sea a plain black filling to neutralize the effect.

While taking care of the treacherous background, I pondered what Sanji’s All Blue would be, now that mermaid’s diet doesn’t include fish... 😂 Like, as a vegan cook, Sanji would want to get his hand on all kind of vegetable available in both world, sea and land? Then we must have the myth of a place, home to every plant possible? What’s the name?? All Green??? Yeah, All Green sounds legit. When the piece was finally done, I uploaded it so fast I forgot the extra step of slapping on watermark! XD

Annnnd that’s that! That’s the whole process I went through drawing mer!Sanji. Thank you for hearing me out > 3 < 💖

#my heart 🥺#we have a chat

15 notes · View notes

spoocys-funhouse · 3 years

Text

A fun little secret

In light of waking up to my blog getting a small raid thanks to my little joke post.

( @raygirlramblings that was the best thing i ever woke up to after sleeping off my chronic insomnia bout episodes. you precious bean you)

i want to share something

so sometimes i like to share in little ideas or just...have fun with one of my friends. These little back and forths i do are NOT canon to my projects. most of these are just au’ stuff thats just having fun. and i dont tend to discuss those. its just having fun and has nothing to do with my actual writing projects minus how the guys tend to act. as i tend to man alot of the main cast here when we do

however i do want to share one. it has to do about the whole DONT EVER GIVE RAYMAN OR GLOBOX ACTUAL GUNS

I too, believe giving real weapons to them is a bad idea...ESPECIALLY GLOBOX.

In rayman’s case. only real “weapon” i ever trust that man with is an axe that he will proceed to use for chopping wood. thats really it.

I want to keep my friend’s privacy so i will not be using their name or their character, nor what that character did in this. Here’s the story.

So i like to brainstorm and have fun with au ideas. my friend here and i decided to one day try a hand at a rayman red dead redemption 2 esque one.

So the general gist was rayman managed to get a group of his friends together just to go exploring. Rayman is actually the guy that is very anti-hunt. he prefers seeking the creature out. marvelling over them, maybe take a few snapshots for bragging rights. he adores fishing but is very much catch release. if he does want to get a fish for eating purposes its not going to be a legendary here.

So during this little adventure. Uglette decided to grow a little garden. Specifically she tried to grow a lil corn patch... Rayman was getting a horse saddled (the horses in this were the lil limbless ones you saw in the rayman educational games here) and next thing he knew he caught eye of globox, standing over that corn patch and the friggen frog dad HAD GOTTEN AHOLD OF A HUNTING RIFLE

rayman paniced like “WHO GAVE GLOBOX A GUN” no one in the party knew who brought that damn thing (Blame kinda went on raymesis. only reason HE was there was because of my friend’s character.) Globox was trying to keep any crows or glutes from raiding his wife’s corn

(If you do some research. glutes are not the globox species. they are actually pest birds that globox hates with a passion. i like thinking glutes are the “Crows” of the rayman universe that will raid your garden and eat the seeds you planted)

(this is a glute. and him stick his leggy out far)

Rayman begged globox to “not shoot someone’s eye out” globox, completely stone faced would respond “Jokes on you rayman this is NOT red rider brand” poor rayman had to leave. he decided to go fishing.

So. There were a few oc’s here in this party. One of these was an oc that is still fairly new to the projects. in the main stream she’s a knaaren elderly woman and actually is gumsi’s adoptive grandmother. or as he calls her “mee-maw” i shall refer to her as mee-maw here. Mee-maw is also a rare kinda knaaren that in the main projects DOES often wander out of the ruins but has to be fully robed and hood up. Gumsi does actually travel with her from time to time despite the dislike of being in sunlight

As rayman’s trying to fish his worries off. Mee-maw comes with gumsi on her shoulders and she just smiles and asks if she and gumsi can stick around for a while. Rayman asked if everything was alright and gumsi just responded with “THAT STUPID TOAD IS FIRING AT ANYTHING THAT MOVES NEAR THE CORN PATCH” Rayman starts to panic about the safety of the camp. but this woman, all smiles while gumsi’s snickering away on her shoulders, performs an about face and you see the rifle globox had was strapped to this woman’s back.

After a while rayman returns to the camp. and globox approaches this woman going “There you are ma’am. give me back my rifle if you please” Mee-maw smiles, unstraps the rifle from her back, holds it up and points to it going “You mean this rifle here?” Globox crosses his arms and goes “Yes. Please give it back to me at once” Mee-maw. once again without missing a beat. responded “GLADLY” and proceeded to club that frogman over his friggen head with the gun. she then fiercely lectured globox on how he needs to practice gun safety and expressed how SHE HAD A CHILD WITH THE PARTY

Gumsi proceeded to lose his shit laughing and fell off his mee-maw’s shoulders.

Moral of the story. Yes. Do not give globox real guns. EVERYONE WITHIN RADIUS FEARS THIS. AND FOR THE LOVE OF JANO’S JAWS ESPECIALLY DONT GIVE HIM FIREARMS WHEN THE GUY IS DRUNK. IF GLOBOX HAS ONE WHILE DRUNK YOU GET A FAST FORWARD OVER TO THE FAIRY COUNCIL WHERE THE HEART OF THE WORLD IS AND GRAND MINIMUS JUST STIRS AND GOES “GENTLEMEN NOW IS THE TIME TO PANIC”

#Potato Ramblings #Rayman #Rayman ubisoft #Globox #i need to stop making shit posts #Raygirlramblings.

23 notes · View notes

renthony · 4 years

Text

Betta 101: A Care Guide For the Uninformed

Y’all know betta fish, those cute little fuckers that want to fight anything and everything. These are my tiny assholes, Helios and Mercury:

[Image description: Two side-by-side photos of betta fish. The first photo shows Helios, a black halfmoon betta with yellow fins. He is swimming through the leaves of a plant rooted in colorful gravel. The second photo shows Mercury, a purple and pink veiltail betta, resting idle at the top of his aquarium. End image description.]

Betta fish are some of the most popular fish in the aquarium hobby, and no wonder! They’re cute! They have a wide variety of colors and fin shapes, and each one is truly beautiful. They stand out in any aquarium, especially in aquariums with darker-colored decorations.

The thing about bettas, though, is that there are a lot of misconceptions about how to take care of them. Every few days I see someone else buying a betta that they’re not equipped to care for, and it makes me so sad.

Because bettas are so damn popular, they’re also, sadly, one of the most mistreated pet fish on the market. Since I’ve spent a lot of time both learning about and caring for betta fish, I thought I’d put together a quick 101 guide and resource list for anyone interested in getting a betta of their own!

This’ll be pretty long, so the rest of the post is under a cut.

Rule Number One: Bettas are not decorations!

Because betta fish are so beautiful and attention-grabbing, they’re often thought of, and used as, nothing more than decorations. Betta fish in tiny bowls or cups are used as centerpieces at weddings, bettas get added to vases of cut flowers to add some pizzazz, and bettas get put in artsy glass bowls to brighten up some bank manager’s office somewhere.

None of those are acceptable ways to house a betta fish! Bettas are not decorations, and they need to be cared for by someone who loves and values them as a living creature, not an attention-grabbing bauble.

Rule Number Two: Bowls are bad!

There’s a very persistent myth about betta fish: “they live in puddles, so they don’t need very much space.” It’s why they wind up in things like centerpieces and vases so often. The thing is, just because betta fish are capable of surviving harsh conditions and minimal amounts of water for a while, it doesn’t mean they’re able to thrive.

Betta fish do not naturally live in puddles! They are native to Thailand, Cambodia, Laos, and Vietnam, and live in rivers, canals, and bodies of standing water such as rice paddies and flood plains. If a betta lives in a rice paddy or floodplain and the water level drastically decreases, bettas are equipped to survive those harsh conditions for a short period of time, but it is not a healthy way for them to live their entire lives. They require plenty of space to swim and claim territory.

The suggested minimum amount of water for a pet betta fish is 2.5 gallons, or 9.5 litres. Personally, I don’t like to keep a betta in anything less than 5 gallons, or 19 litres, but that’s just my preference because, on average, the smaller the aquarium, the more frequent the need for water changes and maintenance. Currently, the smallest tank I have is 10 gallons, which houses a single betta.

Rule Number Three: Temperature is important!

Wild bettas live in a tropical environment, which needs they need warmer water! Your betta aquarium should have a consistent, steady water temperature of between 74 and 80 degrees Fahrenheit, or 23 to 27 degrees Celsius.

Some people who live in warmer climates may not need to use a constant heater, but every aquarium should have a thermometer so you can check the temperature. If you can’t maintain a betta-appropriate temperature without a heater, you’ll need to get one.

Some aquarium heaters are pre-set to specific temperatures, which are fine as long as they’re preset to the right one, and some heaters are adjustable -- it doesn’t matter which one you get and is largely a matter of preference. I have both types of heater and find them equally easy to use, though adjustable heaters have the benefit of versatility should you want to keep different fish in the future.

Rule Number Four: Filters are a must!

You need a filter, period. There are many types of filter, and aquarium hobbyists have different preferences for different fish, but what matters is that a filter exists in your tank. The hang-on-the-back style filters that come in most aquarium kits are perfectly fine, though it’s important that your filter has a low flow, because betta fish can be battered around by strong currents in an aquarium. You should also avoid under-the-gravel style filters, as they are largely not effective enough to filter an appropriately-sized tank.

For those looking for a budget-friendly option, many betta keepers love sponge filters! I personally don’t use them, not for any particular reason other than hang-on-the-back filters were what I had on hand.

I personally don’t have a lot of experience with every kind of filter, so if you’re interested in more details about your filter options, I recommend these YouTube videos:

How to Choose The Right Filter For Your Aquarium!

10 Things You Should Know About Aquarium Filters

Fish Tank Filter Basics!

The BEST Aquarium Filter for BEGINNERS?

Rule Number Five: Careful with decor!

Bettas have very delicate fins that can be easily caught and shredded on sharp decorations. Most plastic plants are dangerous to bettas for this reason. The general guideline for betta-safe decorations is that if you can lightly sweep a single piece of toilet paper across the surface of a decoration without ripping, it should be safe for your betta. If the TP rips, it’s not a betta-safe decoration.

If you notice your betta’s fins are ripped or damaged, and it isn’t a case of fin rot*, it could be damage due to a sharp decoration that you need to remove.

You should also be careful not to use any decorations that might leech paint or other harmful chemicals into your aquarium water. When in doubt, err on the side of caution and choose a different decoration.

* For more about fin rot, see this YouTube video: FIN ROT Fish Disease Prevention and Treatment

Rule Number Six: Bettas need hiding places!

A betta fish’s natural environment is filled with plants and plenty of places to hide, so you should provide them in your aquarium!

Live plants such as anubias and java fern, and floating plants such as salvinia and Amazon frogbit, are perfect and typically easy to find in aquarium shops. With betta fish, there really is no such thing as “too many plants.”

Live plants can be intimidating, though, especially for new aquarium hobbyists. If you can’t find or don’t want live plants, you can get your betta some silk ones instead.

You should also provide things like caves for your betta to hide in. These can be whatever you’d like, from natural-looking logs to hollowed-out coconut shells to colorful themed decor. Just remember what I said up in rule number four about sharp plastic and chemicals!

Rule Number Seven: Careful with tankmates!

Betta fish are highly territorial and extremely aggressive. If you put more than one male betta fish in a tank, they will kill each other, full stop. Your betta does not need a buddy to keep him from getting lonely, end of story, and intentionally housing multiple male betta fish together is blatant animal cruelty.

So don’t do it.

Some experienced betta keepers may keep multiple female betta fish together in an aquarium called a “sorority tank,” but it must be done extremely carefully, and may still be prone to fighting, so this isn’t something you should do if you’ve never kept bettas before.

Male and female fish are never kept together except for supervised mating by an experienced breeder. In the wild, female bettas are able to leave as soon as they release their eggs, leaving the male fish to tend the nest of eggs. In an aquarium, a female must be removed immediately after releasing her eggs, or the two fish will fight, most likely to the death.

While betta fish are territorial and aggressive, and can’t be housed with their own species, they can sometimes be kept with other species of fish. Mileage varies depending on the individual temperaments of your fish, though, and you should carefully research any species you intend to house together.

I have experience keeping my bettas with snails and neon tetras, and they all get along just fine, but other betta keepers have had different experience. For more information on selecting potential tankmates, check out the YouTube videos below:

Top 10 Tank Mates For Bettas

7 Most Popular Betta Tank Mates You Need to Try

Betta Fish Tank Mates | Top 10 Most Popular Tank Mates For Bettas

BETTA FISH TANK MATES | 10 More Great Tank Mates For Bettas

Compatible Tank Mates for Betta Fish

Top 4 Betta Tank Mates

Rule Number Eight: Know your aquarium 101!

If you’re an experienced aquarium keeper, congrats, those are pretty much all the basics of betta fish! There’s plenty more information out there about details and specifics that I encourage you to go out and research, but I’ve pretty much covered Betta 101!

For more information, check out these YouTube playlists:

Betta Fish Care 101

Better Know a Betta

Betta Fish Information

Your First Betta Tank

For those who have never kept fish before, there’s a lot to it that you need to know, and would make this post way, way too long.

So! If you don’t know what a nitrogen cycle is, or how to acclimate a fish, or how to condition water, here’s a list of Fish 101 playlists YouTube. Be sure to do plenty of research, and good luck on setting up your first aquarium!

Fish Keeping 101

The Fish Keeper’s Guide to Aquariums

Beginner’s Guide to Setting Up an Aquarium

The Ultimate Guide to Your First Aquarium

Bonus: Have fun!

I know this giant post seems intimidating, but setting up and maintaining betta aquariums is some of the most fun I’ve had in a hobby. I find everything about these little fish to be utterly delightful, and if you do, too, I promise you all the time and investment is worth it.

Go forth and have fun, and don’t hesitate to show me pictures of your betta!

___

Like this post? Reblogs are better than likes! I also have a Ko-Fi profile if you’re feeling generous. Thanks so much!

#original post #aquariums #aquarium #betta #betta fish #pets #fish tank #fish tanks #pet fish

70 notes · View notes

queenlua · 3 years

Text

does anyone here remember doing Future Problem Solving in high school? because if you have not, like, GOD you are in for such a BIZARRE treat

so the “academic team” in my high school had three components: (1) subject tests, (2) “quick recall” (e.g. they ask questions and your team buzzes into answer, game show style), and (3) future problem solving.

and for years, no one in my damn high school had a damn clue what this Future Problem Solving thing was. like, you’d be given the prompt “debt in developing countries is a big problem, can you make South America less poor”

and i’m sitting here like. damn. to answer this question first i need to study the nature of debt and modern macroeconomics, and then i’d need to do a fuckton of research about a specific South American country’s situation because fuck doing generalizations about a whole continent are you kidding me, and then i’d have to consider what’s actually politically viable—

but apparently this was the wrong way to win the competition. instead, you get points for each “idea” you have for fixing the problem, and because this is the ~future~, you’re just allowed to make up shit? like you could just write a line on the paper saying “invent a technology to increase Peruvian crop yields by 400%,” and that counted for points.

and you were literally graded for quantity over quality, and for some reason this was a team competition, so it’d literally be you and three of your high school buddies bullshitting around like “yo we can help this endangered fish species by genetically engineering them to reproduce asexually” or some dumb shit like that

mind, i never participated until we had some kind of alleged FPS prodigy transfer to our school; she’d won the state competition the previous year or some shit, and i got shanghaied into the team because i did too many academic competitions so what’s one more

and we had all these “practice sessions” that, again! were just bullshitting on the spot! i have no idea why she thought you needed to practice bullshitting but there i was

...and then that year we didn’t even make it out of regionals l m a o

and she was totally devastated, and i was like “dude i read the rubric for this event like 18 times and it literally doesn’t make any damn sense, shit’s random, don’t take it personally”

which in hindsight was NOT the correct thing to say because apparently a lot of her identity was bound up in Being Good At FPS, whatever that meant

(in my defense! the exact same thing happened to me; i totally crushed the competitive-timed-essay competition and won state twice in a row, and then didn’t even get out of regionals the next year, and i was like “damn these random high school teachers hate when i lay down dank pro-GMO meat args,” and then i just got even more trollish every subsequent year and kept taking even more Unpopular Stances that i nevertheless knew i’d backed up with fuckin’ ironclad reasoning, and i kept getting feedback like “this argument is valid but also i hate you for making it, 0/10” and getting under their skin was so much better than any plastic trophy ever was)

anyway—this was all prompted because i learned today that FPS isn’t just some weird Kentucky thing? people all over the world participate in these inane competitions apparently? like, WHAT eccentric billionaire is funding this totally nonsensical pet project, and how on earth did they convince so many schools to actually treat it as a Valid Fucking Event, i am in awe of their bullshittery prowess

#just. what a dumb event #what academic objective is being achieved by learning to bullshit harder #SO weird. did that even happen #feels like a feverdream in hindsight

12 notes · View notes

yikesharringrove · 4 years

Note

Ooooo, could we get some Merman Billy and Human Steve!!! You can go wherever you want with it, I just love your writing and think that you could do amazing things with this headcanon if you want to!!

This has gone through about 6 iterations of Billy being an actual merman, but I just couldn’t make it work tbh, so this is probably NOT what you actually wanted but this is what I thought of while sitting on the floor of the shower. Also the New England Aquarium in Boston is my FAVORITE aquarium I’ve ever been to (hot take: It’s better than Monterrey Bay) I LOVE aquariums.

The New England Aquarium was extremely popular amount the local elementary schools.

Steve Harrington was the most requested tour guide for these groups of small children, was good with them, giving cute facts about fish, knew exactly how to interact with little kids to keep them excited.

He always had a large group between 4 and 6 pm Tuesday - Saturday when the mermaids were there.

It was a new event the aquarium had introduced, people swimming in the large freahwater tank in mermaid tails, waving at the kids through the glass, sometimes interacting with brave little creatures that swam up to them.

Steve could often be found waving at the mermaids, giving pretend facts to the little kids about how the mermaids here at the New England Aquarium are freshwater mermaids that live happily among the fish and mermaids communicate through a combination of special sign language and song.

It was cute, and the kids loved the people swimming by, swimming up to the top of the tank to get lungfuls of air before heading back down to the kids’ line of sight.

But even when Steve wasn’t leading a tour, he would sit near the tank, would watch them swim about, would watch him swim about.

One of the mermaids was this gorgeous man, this mass of thick muscle, with long hair that looked so beautiful in the water, fanned out around him. He would smile and wave at the kids, would swim with the huge awkward tail so effortlessly.

But he didn’t know his name, couldn’t exactly communicate with him through the foot and a half of glass, could just watch him, and wave as he moved past Steve’s tour groups.

Steve was in the locker room after his shift, was heading home early for a date that ended up being cancelled. Steve huffed as he slammed his locker shut, his bag slung over one shoulder, thinking about the last minute cancellation the guy had just tested him, deciding which bottle of wine he was going to crack open tonight.

“You okay?” He startled at the voice, turning to see the gorgeous merman, rifling though his locker, a towel wrapped around his waist as he was still dripping wet.

“Yeah, uh, just a lame night ahead of me.”

“What’s so lame about it?”

“I was supposed to be going on a date, but the guy just cancelled like, an hour before we were supposed to go out so,” he shrugged.

“Damn. Idiot really cancelled on you?” Steve could feel his face growing warm, so he looked down, began fiddling with his keys.

“It’s not uh, anything new. At least he let me know, Usually they just don’t show.” He looked up to find the guy had dropped the towel, was tugging on a pair of jeans.

“Jesus, what fucking dumbasses are standing you up? I want names, numbers, addresses.” Steve laughed as the guy wiggled into a faded sweatshirt, toweling at his hair. “You wanna hang out tonight? I’m looking at a pretty lame one too.”

Steve’s face was red.

“R-really?”

“Yeah, why not? It’ll be fun.” He had a bright smile as he led Steve out of the employee locker room.

“I’m Billy, by the way.” He knocked his shoulder into Steve’s.

“Steve.” They shook hands, Billy showing Steve the way to his car as Steve directed him to his Brighton apartment.

“So how did you end up a merman?” Billy laughed, he laughed a lot, his blue eyes pretty and bright, smile nice and wide, showing off his perfect teeth.

“Honestly, I was asking around the city for places hiring, and the aquarium said they were looking for merpeople, wanted to introduce the program. I work at a restaurant downtown too, but just figured I could use some extra money. How long you been there?” Steve shrugged.

“I studied marine zoology at BU. Just kinda, fell into it.”

“I see you all the time. You must be like, the most popular tour guide in the whole joint.”

“I like kids a lot, so I get some teachers that’ll request me again if they feel I made a connection with their kids.” Billy pulled up in front of Steve’s place, an old house that had been converted into three apartments. He had four roommates, had found an add on some post-grad housing website for two couples looking for a person to take the spare room. Rent was cheap with all of them in one place, and Steve had a nice sized-room, was able to put up shelves and keep several large aquariums. Billy looked at them with wide eyes.

“I had a fish when I was like, ten. Fucker died on in me about two days.”

“I’ve just always loved animals, but especially marine animals. I think they’re all so unique, and absolutely fascinating.” Billy’s head was tilted to the side a bit as he listened to Steve go on about the animals he had in his tanks, all fresh water since he didn’t have the time or energy that went into taking care of a salt one. “So, that’s Margaret, she’s my sweet little Longfin Zebra Danio.” He pointed to each creature, giving their names. Billy would watch each animal Steve pointed out carefully.

“I’d love for you to give me a tour of the aquarium one day. I swim in that tank every day and couldn’t tell you the species of a single fish in there.” Billy was lounging on his bed now, beer in hand, looking at the small tank on the dresser at the foot of Steve’s bed, the one Steve was currently holding little test strips in, pouring in small amounts of chemicals to get the water to a perfect balance. “What made you fall in love with marine life?” Steve shrugged.

“I don’t really know. When I was little I was only allowed to have fish, my parents didn’t want me having, like, messy pets. Didn’t want fur and shit everywhere. So I did a lot of research, had some pretty good tanks. I think marine animals are consistent, and they’re ridiculously easy to take care of once you figure them out. Brackish animals need the perfect proportion of freshwater to saltwater, and sure it can be a lot of work to keep those tight, but it’s simple to understand. All aquatic animals live by specific rules, and I love that. Sometimes things go over my head, but aquatic creatures have patterns and their needs are consistent. I just love them.” Billy had one elbow set on his thigh, his fist propping his head up as he looked at Steve, he looked so soft, so fond.

“They’re straightforward. Reliable.” Steve snapped, pointing at Billy.

“Exactly. Sometimes people let you down, change how you think about them, how you feel, Fish are beautiful, and calming, and honestly, taking care of my fish is sometimes the only time I feel smart, or, or needed.”

“God, just watching you with those kids through the tank, you’re so good at what you do, Steve. And that’s important.” Steve smiled at him.

“Thank you, Merman.” Billy laughed, shoving Steve lightly.

#yikes writes #harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #harringrove fic #harringrove ficlet #harringrove drabble #steve harrington x billy hargrove #billy hargrove x steve harrington

98 notes · View notes

thiswasinevitableid · 4 years

Note

indruck volcano pls?

Here you go! I based Indrid’s mer-design on a Chinook Salmon.

Duck’s search history is getting weird.

In his defense, the last few weeks have been pretty damn weird.

It started two weeks ago, when he was checking tree specimens along the river. One minute he was engrossed in his work, birds chirping and the sky blue above him. The next the hair on the back of his neck was straight up, and he was positive someone, or something, was watching him.

Gradually, the feeling subsided, and he chalked it up to random case of the heebie-jeebies.

Except, two days later, it happened again. And then again the day after that. Each time he looked around, kept his ears on high-alert, and came up with nothing. The fourth time it happened, he got a glimpse of the back and tail of something human-sized and pinkish-red disappearing beneath the water.

He knows his wildlife well, but he’d never seen anything like that. That night, he sat down at his computer for research.

River fish of the pacific northwest?

Biggest species of freshwater fish in pacific northwest?

Are there pink sturgeon?

Pink fish near Mt. Saint Helen's?

How to report illegal, exotic pet selling ring?

The next day, he was leading a tour around the river walk, when something pink-red caught his attention. He kept one eye on it as he spoke, noticed it disappeared under the surface whenever anyone else turned to look it’s way. Towards the end of the tour, he glanced over to find, instead of reddish scales, red eyes watching him from a definitely human face. It blinks, then ducks beneath the current.

Mermaid sightings in Washington?

Animals commonly mistaken for mermaids?

Are mermaids real?

Proof of mermaids other than that freaking discovery channel mockumentary?

Two days later, he’d been bending over the embankment to see if that was a native turtle or a released pet in the water when his hat dropped of his head and into the water, rushing away before he had a chance to go in after it. It was, as his friend Aubrey would put it, a bummer. That hat had pins from all the parks he’d been too, and the first nametag he was ever given as an official member of the park service.

Just before his rounds took him away from the river, he spotted something on a rock at the edge of the water.

His hat.

He was about to thank his luck that it got caught on the stone when he noticed that it had clearly been placed there, and that there wasn’t a speck of mud or dead leaves on it. And whoever put it there had thoughtfully weighed it down with several colorful rocks.

And there were no recent footprints on the shore save for his own.

“Uh, thanks?” He called out over the water, feeling sillier by the second. No response came.

He turned, headed up the bank, and swore he heard over the burble, “You are welcome.”

Can mermaids talk?

Are mermaids friendly?

Which brings him to now, several days later, as he’s back in the same patch of water, trying to fish out the turtles that were, indeed, someone’s non-native pet that had been turned loose.

“You are going to lose your hat again.”

“FUCK!” He stumbles back, landing on his ass in the shallow water. Across from him, peering around a rock, the man who definitely has a fishtail, looks concerned

“Oh dear, in most futures you did not fall.”

“You’re a fuckin’ mermaid. I ain’t crazy! Wait, futures?”

“I can see the future. And no, that is not a thing all merfolk can do, since you were about to ask.”

“I...how...god what the fuck is goin’ on?” His pants are taking on water at an alarming rate, but that is the least of his worries.

“I am introducing myself to you. I thought that was a custom merfolk and humans had in common?”

“It, uh, it is, but, uh, see, most humans don’t expect to ever meet a merperson on account of we assume you ain’t real.”

The merman sighs, “I know. And those who do see us are often frightened. Or try to capture us for money.” Cautiously, he swims away from the rock and over to Duck, stopping a few feet away, water shallow enough that he can keep his arms resting on the pebbly sand and tail flicking drops of water into the air, “but you are not one such human. Which is why I wanted to know you.”

“You, uh, you wanna know me because I don’t seem like I’m gonna sell you off to a sideshow?”

“Among other things. I have been the steward of this portion of river for years, seen many tend to these woods. You have such an air of caring to you when you work, and such competence, it is fascinating to watch. Also I enjoy that you sometimes speak to the trees.”

“I just want ‘em to know they’re grownin’ well.” Duck mumbles, blushing.

“It is charming. If it is alright, I would like to continue watching you when you work. Perhaps I could even talk to you while you do, if it is only you and I around?”

“Uh, sure?” Duck shrugs, “can’t promise sparklin conversation, but I ain’t opposed to the company. Might learn more about trees than you ever care to know.”

“Splendid!” The merman claps his hands together, “some day, in return, you can come swim with me and you can learn more about fish and current than you care to know.”

His enthusiasm skips across the water and Duck catches it.

“You got a deal. Name’s Duck, by the way.”

The merman grins, teeth sharper than Duck expects, “It is nice to meet you Duck. I am Indrid.”

Mermaids carnivorous?

Should you offer to share your lunch with a mermaid?

Indrid, true to his word, appears now and then over the next few days. Sometimes, if the trails or river are busy, Duck will just see flashes of tail, or a flicker of a face peeking around a rock.

Other times Indrid will float on his back or even climb up onto a rock to watch him work. He asks Duck questions about birds, and trees, the various behaviors of humans that confound him. Duck, in turn, asks him about his life in the river, about the layout of merfolk up and down this part of the state.

Some days, Indrid is nowhere to be seen. But on those days, Duck will spot pictures drawn into the mud or sand of the riverbank, as high up as Indrid was able to manage. Sometimes, it’s as simple as a drawing of a merperson waving. Others it tells Duck where to spot a rare salamander or songbird. Once or twice, it’s reminder of something Duck needs to do that day after work, something he meant to write down but didn’t and is glad for the reminder of. He assumes Indrid must use his future sight for those.

On the days when it’s only messages in the sand, he’s always sure to leave a happy face (or the words “thank you” once he teaches Indrid how to recognize it).

It’s been three days of sand messages, the longest stretch yet (Duck misses him, keeps hoping he’ll turn and see that toothy smile) when Indrid finally appears and asks, “would you like to swim with me tonight?”

Given that it’s pushing a hundred degrees (the kind of day that makes him feel as though the mountain will erupt at any moment) and he’s fairly certain Indrid either can’t or won’t eat him, Duck says yes.

When his shift is over, he heads down to their agreed meeting space, an inlet that’s off limits to the public and has a calm current.

“I assume you wear those because otherwise the water is too cold for you?” He points at Duck’s swimtrunks, the spare pair he keeps in the car.

“Kinda. Mostly to, uh, preserve our modesty.”

“Ah.” Indrid says with the tone and nod that Duck knows means, “I understand but think it is a bit silly.”

As soon as he’s up to his chest in the water, Indrid is swimming around him, talking animatedly and brushing his body along Duck’s back. Duck shivers at the contact, tells himself it’s from the unfamiliar, cool scales.

Their conversation turns to Indrid’s younger years, and he admits to harassing a flock of college students who were tubing and kept chucking their beer cans into the water.”

“How’d you get ‘em to stop?”

“My tail is rather strong, so I got it under their tubes and just-” he flicks his tail out of the water with a huge splash, the bulk of which hits Duck.

“Ackhey!” He splutters, giggling.

“ApologiesAH!” Indrid shakes his head in surprise when Duck splashes him back. The human gets another wave directed at him by Indrid’s tail, and when his vision clears the merman is gone.

“Uh oh.” He says just as Indrid pops out of the water in front of him, drenching him as he does. The tail sneaks behind his legs and knocks them out from beneath him. But before he goes under, willowy arms grab him.

“I win.” Indrid grins.

“Guhhuh.” He flails a bit, trying to right himself, and his hand slides up Indrid’s tail.

“Mmmmmm.” Indrid sighs as he helps him up, “that feels nice.”

“Is it, uh, can I do it again? It’s kinda cool, never felt anythin’ quite like it.”

“Of course.” Indrid rests his head on Duck’s shoulder as the human runs his hand up and down his tail, noting the dark flecks in the red.

“It been the same color all these years, or does it change?”

“That’s a fascinating question….”

They talk until the sun goes down, resting against each other all the while.

Merman tail sexual thing?

Can a human fall in love with a merman?

Can a merman love a human?

Merman porn?

Two days later, Duck is just starting his rounds by the river when Indrid emerges, eyes frantic.

“Duck, Duck, the volcano-”

“Oh fuck me, is it-”

“No, it is not erupting again, but, but there will be an earthquake on account of it’s seismic activity. You need to clear the visitor center, the roof is going to come down and it will kill twenty five people. You have fifteen minutes.

Duck runs, is winded by the time he reaches the center, and no matter how he tries, his coworkers will not listen to him (he wishes Juno was working today, he might be able to tell her the whole truth).

Out of ideas and time, he pulls the fire alarm.

The center evacuates in a hurry, and just as his boss is about to ask what the hell he’s doing, the ground shudders once beneath them. Then again, more violently, thirty seconds and an eternity all once of cracking and shaking and shouts of alarm.

The visitor center is ruins.

But everybody is alive.

-------------------------------------

Duck rolls his pants up, wading a little ways into the water as he chucks stones into it

“You did it.” Indrid surfaces, swimming over to float off to his left.

“Yeah. Guess I did. Got two days suspension for pullin’ the fire alarm though.”

“I am sorry.”

“Ain’t the end of the world. Uh, are there any more of those comin’?”

Indrid thinks for a moment, “No, none so severe in the forseeable future.”

“And the volcano?” He steps into deeper water.

“Still not erupting any time soon.”

“Can, uh, can I ask you the odds of one more thing?”

“Of course.”

“Uh, what, what are the chances of you and I kissin’?”

Indrid swims the few feet between them, looping his arms around Duck’s shoulders and planting a single, cool kiss on his lips.

“Indrid.” Duck whispers, ready to wade in over his head just for another kiss, knowing for certain Indrid would never ask him to.

“Before you ask: yes, my sweet, I do see many more of those in our future.”

#indruck #mermay #mermaid au #mermay fills #indrid cold/duck newton

42 notes · View notes

irrfahrer · 3 years

Text

Zivs Zombie Apocalypse Skill Set !

⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ ⚈ = [ Perfect Skill ] ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ ⚆ = [ No Skill ]

Auto Mechanics | Carpentry - Beside the known fact that Ziv is a horrible Pilot and takes no joy in pottering around with engines and mechanics, she does has certaine skills in keeping engines running. Its simpy because she is required to know how to set up, use and keep working harvester, gardening-bases, generators to keep those bases running, and farming-engines. She had read the books she needs to know and will be able to build, replace and use certaine engines and also improvies in using mechanic leftovers in building something that resembles something that works like the mechanics she is trained to use as a AgriCorps Member. Accordingly she is able to keep up mechanics and build tools sh needs to set up a base.

Hunting and Trapping | Fire Building - As a carnivore and someone trained to look out for themself when working alone from big cities to research on Flora and collect samples of that Flora sometimes weeks away from civilisation, Ziv is a very good hunter. However, while she can set up a fire, usually the Tynnans thick pelt is enough to keep her warm in any situations. Seldomly she is ever in places where the temperatures drop down to -50° Celsius that would make even her a little nippy.

Driving | Sailing - When one is force-sensitive one can enhance the reflexes, the own stamina, the strength, one can enhance the hearing, one can enhance the sensing of the world which Ziv instinctively uses when shooting a Blaster. However, this does not work when it is not her arm holding the blaster and it is not her body that moves. Accordingly Ziv is a very bad and also very impatient Pilot. This fact in combination with Zivs temperamental nature results in her overcompensating her lack of skill in driving and flying by being very reckless and an utter daredevil whenever she is set inside a cockpit. Horseback Riding - Ziv is not especially fond of riding on vehicles, be they living beeings or build of mechanic. The feeling of moving forward withou her feet on hard ground disturbs her keen senses and makes her nauseatic. The fact that she is not able to reach out to other beeings telecinetically makes the whole process also very uncomfortable for her as she does not know hoe´w the animal will react. Navigation - While trusting on the Tynnans eyesight to navigate is like trusting a blind man- literally!- Zivs keen sense of scent and hearing and her knowledge of botanic makes her someone who can easily recognise their place in a wilderness and what way to go to find civilisation or other people. Firearms Handling - Despite Zivs horrible eyesight, she is surprisingly good at shooting a Blaster and hitting targets, moving or not. Naturally this is because Ziv has from a very young age used the Force instinctively to enhance her senses to compensate for her poor eyesight and in combination with the training she received as a Learner in the Jeditemple, Ziv had learned to perceive her surroundings through her already excellent ears and sense of scent with the force.She would never be able to shoot a fly on the wall with a blastershot, but she is able to shoot off kneecaps. Usually because those are on her eyelevel. Improvisation - The AgriCorps had only a .ittle over a thausand members at the time of Order 66, so one Specialist usually worked alone considering how much work they had in the galaxy spanning from terraforming, researching, rebuilding ecosystems, reacting on natural and non natural disasters on planets and helping on planets haunted by famine and diseases. Accordingly Ziv ahd also been prepared to work alone with what she had, especially if she would have been send to a wild planet for researchs or to by disaster completly destroyed planets. Improvising is therefor still a skill that is very important for her life. Fishing- Someone who is from a species of aquatic Mammals who have whiskers to track down fish who had passed a location in the water a hour after they had passe dthis location through the vibration they leave in the water are obviously very good fisher. FISH IS LITERALLY 90% OF ZIVS SPECIES NATURAL DIET. If she would not knew how to fish and give her body the needed nutrients she would just die since she would have been too stupid to live. Foraging | Farming- As a member of the Agri Corps Ziv can name by heart thousands of Herbs, plants, barks, Molds and mushrooms, together with the knowledge of where they grow, how they grow, how they can be used, how they can be prepared and how they are at best harvested. Her focus is mainly on Healing, which naturally includes poisons. After all, it's the dose that makes the poison.Accordingly Ziv has developed a great skill as a Healer and Medic and is with her supplies of herbs, powders, teas and ointments able to treat blasterwounds as good as fevers and illnesses. Even if she is without her supplies, the Tynnans education in the Agri Corps makes her able to find proper materials for taking care of the injured or sick or to feed herself. Ziv is able to set up gardens with barely any recources beside what she is carrying with herself. When it comes to farming Ziv is literally the most professional person one can ask for advice. First Aid - Before the Order 66 Ziv had been trained as a Jedi-Healer and had been specifically send to the AgriCorps to be trained under the former Jedimaster X’Ma who had been a great Healer during her time as a Jedimaster. While her Helaing ability with the Force is blocked, Ziv still has the skills as a medic she had been trained in most of her lifes. She knows the anatomy of most common met aliens in the galaxy, she knows which herbs and plants can be used to cue any kind of sicknesses, she knows how to treat any kind of wound and while it is always better to jump into a bacta-tank beeing around Ziv is a good way to survive. Climbing - As someone who has to collect her own recources of flora, Ziv has to go through every kind of enviorment which also includes climbing big rocks. Swimming - Ziv is literally the offspring of a species who are aquatic Mammals who can live as well on the land as they could in the water to a point that half of their buildings are actually build in Tynnans oceans. Ziv has webbing between her fingers and toes, a waterproofed pelt a proper layer of bladder to keep her warm and proper whiskers to detect through the vibration they left behind something that swom past her in the water up to an hour in the water. In the same manner Ziv can bear temperatures down to -50°Celsius. The Tynnan is a perfect swimmer by nature and the fact that she had been trained on stamina and endurance is making her even better in swimming. Water Collecting- While Ziv is not a moisture Farmer, she had been teached proper skils to collect water for the times she would be a AgriCorps Specialist on far away planets where she would have been suppose to set up bases and grow crops on dead planets.

Lock Picking - The Tynnans way of openings locks is actually ripping them off the door or kicking in the door. Tynnan are very strong despite their short stature and usually that works. She is also not especially skilled in code slicing despite actually beeing trained in it as everyone else growing up in the Jedi Temple. Sewing- Ziv can sew skin perfectly, so she can sew anything else. Although it might not look as neatly as when she sews skin. Cooking - For someone with a carnivorous diet Ziv is a suprisingly good cook. This came from the combination of her botanical and medical training as she had to learn the galaxys flora and their effect on the aliens living in it. Often forgotten,but food is a medicine too and Ziv had to learn what foods had what effect on the aliens she was treatening as her patients to enhance their healing-process. Stamina- Someone who had been trained since a child in physical endurance, who was teached in the AgriCorps to survive on wild planets for researches and settler-Help and who literally comes from a species known for their natural strenght and endurance, has a pretty high stamina.

Tagged By: The Force Tagging: @gildedcommander @damn-space-wizards @berrakhira @onehell-of-apilot @psychometrictouch @gaudygangster @poewingsdameron @kylo-wrecked @negotiaetor @cfmartyrs @force-hurikane @superstcs @destroyworlds @crispydiplomatbonkghost @thaneirstaer @samaritancpt @fshto @verelis @lvkexskywvlker @secondsister @drabbles-n-doodles (For all of your Muses you want to try it with!) @volatilekyber @preempire @therabidcur @lothlost @ariadne-inthesky @uniforced @archaeotech @trueheartofarebel @protectxthem @luceat @masterofthelivingforce @muddledbloodlines @startrailed @empathyjedi @rcfekjwtaardby @protectxthem @kcrkie @sithdestined @khenobi @thezabrakassassin @lady-proudmoore @safrona-shadowsun @stubborn-amphibian @asycuwish @rabldcur @memorytouched @cardinal-carvings @ncxile @skywlkrr ...and everyone else who wants to do the prompt!

#you know since ZIV LITERALLY IS BASED ONTWO ZOMBIE-APOCALYPSE-STARWARS BOOKS #this was needed xD #headcanon #Ziv would keep herself alive pretty good #UNLESS SHE WOULD BE AROUND OTHER PEOPLE FOR THAT ALWAYS BRINGS PROBLEMS #irrfahrer #Ziv Odiz' zee

3 notes · View notes

knifeshoeoreofight · 6 years

Photo

@sidgenophotochallenge

This fic owes a lot to the following documentary about humpback whale calves. Please watch it sometime, it’s beautiful. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B48ifA0Sw5Y

Disclaimer: I barely scraped through Gen-Ed Bio. Forgive me. I can research but I don’t know how to science.

The hydrophones have been picking up nonsense for the past three days and Zhenya has had it up to here, honestly.

He pulls his bulky headphones off and leans back, wincing at the alarming creak of his battered office chair. Maybe if they can get another grant they can finally get some office furniture that isn’t falling apart.

A pipe dream, as it now seems they’re going to have to scrounge up some new audio equipment, fucking hell. He glares mulishly at the spectrogram, willing it to look more like a normal humpback whale vocalization recording.

“S’up G?” Letang asks, closing the screen door to the office with a bang. He’s casually eating a banana with one hand, and is fixing his hair with the other. He drops himself into the other office chair and kicks his feet up on top of a stack of Zhenya’s printouts.

“Recordings from last three days are complete pizdets,” Zhenya says, glaring. “Feet off my fucking papers.”

“Damn, G. Who pissed in your cornflakes?” Letang drawls, but takes his feet off the desk. “And how, pray tell exactly, are they ‘pizdets’?”

“Finally get good position to pick up sounds I’m want. Then there is, interference maybe, all over the audio. Don’t know what is. Radio signal, maybe. Or sound through boat hull? Fucking weird.”

“Weird, huh?” Letang perks up. “Liiike, undiscovered species weird?”

Zhenya makes a dismissive noise,and cues up one of the clearest clips. “All I’m know is ruin three days of recording, and maybe Ma— H-183 will go calve somewhere else.”

“Shouldn’t name the whales, man, it’s bad science,” Letang says, grinning.

“I don’t” Zhenya grumbles, even though he’s definitely been calling the very pregnant H-183 “Magda.” He’s been satellite tracking her since she left the waters off Labrador.

He’s hoping to publish a paper on the vocalizations of pregnant and nursing North Atlantic Humpbacks. He gets teased that he just chose the topic so he can spend his time mooning over baby whales. Which is rich, considering the cooing he’s caught Letang and Fleury doing over his research materials. The French Canadians are here on behalf of The University of New Brunswick, doing research on coral.

The point is, there is a fair amount of work done studying male humpback vocalizations: chiefly of their mysterious songs. But females vocalize too, even if they don’t sing. Zhenya wants to study the communication between mothers and newborns. And to do that, he needs his equipment to fucking function. He can’t miss this window of opportunity. Magda— damn it, H-183, has completed her annual migration from the cold waters of the Maritimes to the clear warm seas of Bermuda to have the calf she’s been gestating for nearly a year.

“Here,” he tells Letang, handing him the headphones. “Listen.” Letang puts them on, and Zhenya presses play. Letang’s look of unconcerned indifference melts into intense, puzzled focus as he listens.

The clip ends, and Letang leans back, slowly. “What the fuck, man.”

Zhenya groans, and rakes his fingers through his hair. “I know. Fucking weird. I’m tell you.”

“Uh huh,“ Letang says, staring into space. “Play it again. You say you have more of this?”

They listen for long minutes, trying to parse the sounds. They’re deeply strange. They almost sound like muffled human voices, which is why Zhenya first thought that maybe the hydrophones were picking up radio. Maybe. He’s not a sound engineer, he doesn’t know if that’s possible. The sounds, though, are so distorted and strange that it’s hard to imagine them coming from a normal radio. There are clicks and buzzes and pops, and even the parts that sound almost human are nothing like words, follow no recognizable patterns of speech.

Letang and he share a glance. The look on Letang’s face is making a cold, prickly feeling spread from Zhenya’s stomach to the rest of his body. He’d dismissed the strangeness of the sounds, hadn’t paid enough attention to it. Explained it away. Letang’s incredulous seriousness is… kind of freaking Zhenya out. Making him think this is something, after all. Not just distorted radio signals. And if it’s not that, then—

“You know what this almost reminds me of,” Letang says, still frowning into the middle distance. “What’s that one African language, the one with the clicks?”

“Xhosa,” Zhenya supplies. “No, it’s not like that. Listen.” There’s a long, almost metallic whrrrrrrr from the recording, followed by a series of clicks, then three deep whooping noises that would almost sound like whalesong, except they aren’t nearly loud enough. And are the completely wrong frequency.

“We should go back out there,” Letang says, slowly. “Put the hydrophones in again. See what we get. Can’t hurt. You need to get more recordings anyway, right? The coral can wait a day or two, it’s not going anywhere.” He smirks at his own joke.

Zheya nods, and stares once again at the spectrograms. They aren’t an annoyance anymore. Now they’re unsettling. That cold, prickly prey instinct is still settled in his bones, and he’s so, so glad Letang is coming out with him tomorrow.

***

They’re up before dawn, hauling gear onto the boat in the pre-sunrise murk. Zhenya checks and double checks the audio equipment, and checks and double checks his data on where Magda— H-183 has been spending her time.

Letang has roped Fleury and Kessel both into the expedition, and even a couple of the undergrads. Zach and Dominik are yawning and sleep-rumpled, but seem pretty thrilled about the entire affair.

“I am hoping it’s some kind of new species,” Dominik says, his lilting Czech accent even thicker this early in the morning.

“Dude, right??” enthuses Zach, clapping his hands on Dominik’s shoulders and rocking him gently back and forth. “I’ll name it after you, bro.”

“Aw, thanks.”

Zhenya laughs to himself a little. He still can’t figure out if they’re actually together or are just super close bros. Not that it matters, really. It’s cute either way.

“Equipment look good?” Letang asks him, leaning over to peer at the hydrophone cables Zhenya is rearranging.

Zhenya shrugs. It’s as good as it’s going to get. Letang claps him on the shoulder, goes to start the engine.

***

It takes them until the sun is up over the horizon to find Magda, but they see her spout before they even have to drop the hydrophones in to listen. Letang cuts the engine, and they drift closer.

Zhenya watches the arch of Magda’s massive back as she slides back under the water. One reason he chose her to study is that she has a deep, distinctive scar digging into her dorsal ridge, probably from getting tangled in commercial fishing nets when she was younger. It makes identifying her at a distance easier.

He drops in one of the hydrophones, and everyone stops what they’re going to crowd around Zhenya’s laptop. At first there’s nothing, just crackling static and water sounds. Magda isn’t making any noise.

Then, a few faint sounds, probably male humpbacks singing miles away. Things quiet again. Zach starts to say something but Fleury shushes him. Time crawls on.

Magda gifts them with some sounds about an hour in, a couple of low, rumbling “whops” that make Zhenya smile.

“Hi, pretty girl,” he croons at the computer as he notes the timestamp so he can isolate the clip later. Letang wants to make a rude comment, he knows, but thankfully decides to be an adult and restrains himself.

Magda is staying is approximately the same area, as indicated by the spray she sends up when she surfaces to breathe. She’s probably close enough to observe underwater and Zhenya eyes the diving gear they brought along. He’s never actually been in the water with her.

Another of the deep “whop”s from the whale, and then everyone jumps when the strange alien sounds Zhenya had recorded before suddenly crackle through the laptop speakers. A long “whrrrr,” then the same pattern of clicks as on the previous recording.

“Tabernak,” Letang breathes. “Geno, you’re sure that isn’t the whale?”

Zhenya shakes his head. “Sure. Wrong frequency. Not anything recorded from humpbacks before.”

“Is someone gonna go take a look?” Zach asks quietly looking simultaneously excited and terrified someone is going to ask him to do it.

“I’ll go,” Zhenya says. “If nothing, still can record visual observation of Magda.”

Magda Letang mouths at Kessel. Seriously, invertebrate specialists. Assholes, all of them. He goes to ready his scuba gear, leaving the rest of them clustered around the laptop, listening to the noises still issuing from it.

***

When the bubbles from his entry into the water clear, Zhenya almost spits out his regulator in surprise at how close Magda is. The current must have drifted the boat towards her. She’s about fifty meters or less away, drifting motionless mid level in the water column. It’s shallow and clear enough here that he can just make out the bottom, far beneath them both, patches of white sand and darker coral.

She’s so beautiful. Seeing her like this brings new awareness of the sheer size of her. Zhenya can make out the movement of one huge, intelligent eye as she notes his appearance in her realm but doesn’t move. She’s conserving all her energy for the monumental task of delivering her calf into the world.

One pectoral flipper arcs majestically as she keeps herself steady in the water. Zhenya’s chest feels tight with emotion and his eyes water inside his mask. There she is, after all these months. The hope of her embattled species, heavy with the future.

He’s so overcome that he forgets for a moment that he’s supposed to be looking for something else. He turns in a slow circle, keeping in position with slow kicks of his scuba fins. Nothing. Just an infinity of blue, and Magda’s graceful bulk. He makes sure his GoPro is recording in its waterproof housing, and wonders if it will bother her if he ventures just a little bit closer. Just a bit. Can’t hurt, if she’s so calm even with the boat so close.

He makes it maybe a dozen yards closer when he sees something move beneath her, too large to be a remora or some other kind of hitchhiking fish. His first thought is that maybe she had her baby already after all, and then it swims out from under her shadow and comes toward him. And

It’s

There’s a deep, instinctual terror that comes when what you’re seeing does not connect with what your instinct knows to be true. A cold, all consuming flash of sensation as your brain screams “WRONG, THIS IS WRONG” at you. Something left to center of reality. Something moving in a way that it shouldn’t.

Zhenya feels it now, as a figure glides toward him, with smooth, powerful stokes of its.

His. His tail.

Geno’s camera drops from his nerveless fingers.

He doesn’t look like the creatures of myth and legend, at least, not completely. His tail doesn’t sparkle with scales, but has the dull sheen of a shark’s skin. A darker color it’s hard to make out under the water fades to pale skin at his waist. He has dark hair that floats about his face like a cloud, and he snarls at Zhenya, baring sharp canine teeth like an otter’s.

The… merman’s….throat works and jumps, and past the rushing of the blood in his own ears and the hiss of his air supply Zhenya’s can hear sounds like the ones on the recording. A language. His mouth is closed, he doesn’t seem to need to open it to speak.

Deep beneath the animal panic engulfing his brain, the scientist in Zhenya is fascinated.

The merman makes an angry, aggressive gesture, and that’s when Zhenya notices that he’s carrying a wicked looking weapon with a long, curved blade. It has to be made from bone, the handle wrapped in what looks, surprisingly, like nylon rope.

Lost fishing gear and nets the scientific corner of Zhenya’s brain supplies.

The merman’s eyes flick downwards, and he gives Zhenya another baleful look as he dives downwards.

Zhenya follows him with his gaze. You don’t turn your back on a predator, says the prey instinct part of his brain. You don’t turn your back on something so incredible, says the scientist part. Incredible. The word is inadequate and colorless.

Up the merman comes, the muscular undulation of his body and his tail just as eerie and just as beautiful as before. He’s got something clutched in his free hand, Zhenya sees. It’s the GoPro. The merman shakes it at him, scowling, a burst of noise coming from his throat.

Zhenya isn’t sure what he wants. He doesn’t move except to kick his fins to keep himself in position. How much air does he have left? How long has he been down here?

Without thinking, he reaches a hand out towards the camera in the merman’s hand. The merman flinches away, then moves closer, staring at Zhenya’s hand, his arm. Zhenya is wearing a wetsuit, but no diving gloves. The merman reaches out his own hand. His fingers are webbed. His hand closes over Zhenya’s wrist, and Zhenya can feel the iron strength in it.

Is he going to drown me he thinks. Am I going to die right now?

He tugs his arm, panicked, trying to pull it toward himself. A flood of bubbles escape around his regulator and he must scream or make some kind of sound around it, because the merman drops his hand, and lets him go.

Humpbacks hunt with bubble nets, he suddenly remembers. Or use them in dominance displays. What does the merman think the bubbles from his air tank and the hissing sound of his artificially aided breath mean?

He takes a deep gulp of air and pulls the regulator from his mouth. The merman visibly startles. Zhenya almost wants to laugh. Does he think Zhenya just detached some part of his body?

The merman peers at him, leaning in so close Zhenya can see the color of his eyes. Not quite green. Not quite gold.

Zhenya’s lungs are burning. He has to get the regulator back in his mouth. He fumbles it, and with a gasp, sweet oxygen trickles back into his lungs. He kicks his fins to back away, put some distance between the merman and himself.

To his surprise, the merman holds out the GoPro, head tilted in a way that feels very human. Zhenya reaches out again, and takes the camera from him. For some reason he can’t fathom himself (besides possible hysteria) he gives the merman a thumbs up. The merman blinks, then copies the gesture.

Zhenya lets loose a burst of bubbles in an aborted shout of overwrought laughter. A merman just gave him a thumbs up. Belatedly, he tilts the camera at him, sweeps it from his head to the flukes of his tail. Zhenya won’t believe that this actually happened if he doesn’t manage to record something.

The merman startles, then turns around. Over his shoulder, Zhenya can see that Magda is moving, immense tail making a slow downwards stroke as she decides she’s had enough of whatever the two of them are up to. The merman looks between her and Zhenya, eyes narrowed in mistrust, but then must decide that while Zhenya is a conundrum, he has more important things to do. He turns and follows the whale, looking back at Zhenya a few more times until they disappear into the blue.

Suddenly Zhenya is panicked for air, and sun, and a solid surface under his feet. He kicks up towards the dark shape of the boat above wondering what the fuck he’s going to do now.

***

As soon as he’s hauled back on the boat by his colleagues he’s tearing at the straps of his gear, yanking his mask from his face as he gasps for air. He flails out of his BC and his fins, ignoring everyone’s alarmed questioning and waving off their help, He lies back on the deck and closes his eyes, clutching the GoPro and trying to get his breathing to quiet and return to normal.

When he finally pulls himself to a sitting position, everyone is staring at him.

“We…heard a lot of that noise through the hydrophone,” Fleury says. “What happened?”

Zhenya shakes his head. “You won’t believe me until you see video,” he says, and their eyes all go wide. He ignores another barrage of questions and just points at the boat’s wheelhouse. “Let’s go back. I need to think.”

They give him looks the entire ride back, but he just wraps his arms around his knees and tries to decide what to do.

***

As soon as they get back, secure the boat, and make it back to their research office, Zhenya inserts the Gopro’s SD card into the reader with shaking hands. The footage downloads, and everyone clusters around his computer.

Zhenya watches it in a fog, as everyone around him cries out, swears, and babbles as the merman swims out from behind Magda. When the camera falls, the mount it was on weighs it down in such a way that it continues to point upwards, and Zhenya watches himself and the merman silhouetted against the light of the surface.

He stays silent as they ask him how he got the camera back, then yell when the merman comes and picks it up. The footage continues to play, swinging wildly until the point that Zhenya regains control of it, sweeps it along the entire length of the merman’s body.

When the merman and the whale disappear and the footage ends, they all look as pale and shell-shocked as Zhenya. They exchange glances at each other in silence.

Zhenya isn’t certain of anything anymore. Except two things.

One. They aren’t telling anyone about this.

And two. He’s going right back out there tomorrow.

#sidgeno #sidney crosby/evgeni malkin #hockey rpf #dana writes a thing

241 notes · View notes

broken-clover · 5 years

Text

Illyria Aquarium AU

I think I’ve mentioned I have way way too many ideas when it comes to this series, and that also includes AU’s! I never got around to writing it, so maybe it’ll be fun to toss out some ideas instead of letting stuff collect dust in my docs.

-Not exactly a standard Mermaid AU, instead it focuses on the titular aquarium, which more-or-less functions as a sanctuary for various types of mermaids (or ‘mer’) for them to be taken care of and studied.

-Dr. Asuka R. Kreutz is the owner, director, and board head, but god help you if you actually see him come out of his office because that’s usually a sign that someone screwed up royally if he has to come intervene. He’s a shut-in in just about every sense of the word, but somehow everything still manages to get done.

-(Correction: The interns get everything done)

-Dr. Aria Valentine, Sr. is a big well-known marine biologist who’s worked with mer for decades alongside Dr Kreutz, at least until she moved on to solo work. Most recently, she did a study on two lionfish-types, Elphelt and Ramlethal, at least until part of her home facility collapsed, which forced her to find new homes for them and talk to her old friend for the first time in about ten years.

-In the process, she also kills two birds with one stone when she finds that the aquarium has a need for a temp worker.

-Enter: Aria Valentine, Jr., known as ‘Jack-O’ by anyone and everyone due to her love of candy and all things spooky. She grew up watching her mom’s studies, and has inherited a similar enthusiasm. She’s poured over books and mom’s research notes, but ultimately she’s in no way prepared for all the advanced biology stuff since she doesn’t have a doctorate, so she’s mostly responsible for giving everyone food and managing toys, general housekeeping and making sure none of the mer have killed one another.

-Axl’s the senior temp, which basically just means that he’s been there longer. But you’ll be damned if he ever actually shows up on time for his shift. The only reasons he hasn’t been fired yet is because 1, they are chronically understaffed, and 2, he is ridiculously good when it comes to some of the ‘trouble spots.’ For some reason, even the shier mer seem to take a shine to him. He and Jack-O get along positively swimmingly (lol) which is good, because sometimes when things go bad the two of them are stuck working ridiculous shifts and need to be able to get along.

-Dr. I-no (formally Dr. Ringo, but don’t call her that if you value your life) is one of the marine biologists, even though she doesn’t really seem it at first. Sure, she’s positively brilliant, but she’s also got the dirtiest mouth of anyone you’ll meet and has no filter (so obviously, she isn’t allowed to do the kindergarten tours) and is kind of an asshole. She isn’t completely heartless, though. She’s prone to being easier on Jack-O and offering her advice, and ultimately, she does care very deeply about the mer she’s in charge of keeping healthy.

-Nobody knows where Dr. Raven came from. He’s surrounded by rumors. All that can be confirmed is that he and Asuka have worked together for basically forever and he was around back when the Aquarium first opened. He’s scrawny and creepy-looking, has white hair, and talks like an old man, but he can also lift more than everyone else so there’s a rumor that he’s either unkillable or some sort of cryptid who really likes mermaids. Despite that, he’s actually really friendly, even if he seems to get into a lot of accidents and injure himself without really noticing or caring. It does help that he’s also the human doctor on-site, and knows how to patch up his own wounds.

-That’s it. That’s the entire staff. They have a lot to take care of but they can’t find many people who are both qualified and interested enough to do anything outside of temp work. So things going wrong is remarkably common, though fortunately, nobody has been killed yet

Mer Residents

-Sol is presumed to be a sunfish-type, which confuses everyone on multiple fronts. He’s a lot faster than he looks, and he’s also far more aggressive than a mola has any right to be. Most sunfish are chill and relaxed, and Sol can and will attack his tankmates unless he’s sleeping or tearing through his dinner. This does not, however, stop Axl from trying to befriend him, with Jack-O often having to pull Axl back at the last second before Sol can bite off his hand.

-Ky is basically the aquarium’s equivalent of a mascot. He’s an electric eel, but he’s incredibly well-mannered and good-looking, so he’s very often a star attraction for visitors, and appears on a lot of promos and ads for the facility (and yes, they do also have plushies of him at the gift shop. Jack-O bought one her first day and keeps it on her desk). He can easily get exasperated by the more rowdy fish, but still likes to socialize. He and Potemkin get along well, and he’s got a weird rivalry/friendship with Sol that on occasion results in the sunfish getting zapped.

-Nobody is exactly sure what Sin is or where he came from. He looks kinda like an eel and he’s got the blonde hair, so it’s presumed Ky is one of the parents. He’s a lot stronger than Ky, though, and doesn’t like to sit still, so Sol often needs to be enlisted to catch him for any number of reasons. Sin just kinda appeared one day and with an eye injury, so the staff taped on a waterproof patch. He still gets around okay, though he’s a bit dense, so on numerous instances he’s bumped into his own tank wall.

-Potemkin is a whale shark, and the biggest mer by far (though humorously, he’s considered on the small side for his species) and even though he could knock down the walls with ease, he’s a very relaxed fellow who prefers making drawings on the tank floor and playing with his super-reinforced toys than causing any kind of trouble. Since he’s so calm, he’s often used to try and encourage better behavior with their more troublesome residents, which is doubly useful since he’s hard to beat up if it doesn’t work out.

-Faust is a spiny seahorse, but like Sol, he moves far too fast for one. They also have to be very careful what tank they put him in. It isn’t that he’s asocial- in fact, he’s so over-social that it makes all the other mer uncomfortable. He seems half-convinced that he’s a biologist too, and likes attempting rudimentary ‘checkups’ on his tankmates. He even managed to get his hands on an aquarium labcoat, and he won’t give it back under any circumstances. His favorite toys are hats of all kinds. He has a collection.

-May is a bottlenose dolphin, and she has won the unofficial ‘most destructive’ award. The girl does not know her own strength, and has shattered a tank wall out of sheer excitement on more than one instance. When she isn’t causing damage, she tends to cling to Johnny since they were transferred there together, but she does also play with the other younger mer, like Sin and Bridget.

-Johnny is a grey reef shark, and also the smarmiest punk among all of them. Most of his time is spent either attempting to seduce female mer, or stealing anything remotely shiny and hoarding it. To keep his entertained and minimally destructive, it’s a common game to hide shiny coins in his enclosure or hidden inside of containers for him to find in ‘treasure hunts.’

-Baiken and Anji are a pair of koi who generally keep to themselves. Baiken was initially brought in after being found stuck in a dam, which resulted in severe damage to their eye, arm, and fin, all of which needed to be amputated. They’ve got a prosthetic arm and fin now, but it hasn’t done much for their temperament, and they’re rather sour and surly, preferring to keep away from crowds. They are a biter, and have caused fights in the past.

-Anji is basically Baiken’s opposite, which is good, since he seems to be the only one they can stand. He’s the arsty type, and likes to do little dances to flounce his fins whether or not there are people watching. He can be a bit mischievous, so it’s advised not to let your guard down around him.

-Chipp is a rainbow trout-type that somehow became convinced that he’s a koi. He mostly tries to follow Baiken and Anji around, but Baiken inevitably gets annoyed with him and chases him off. He is also a troublemaker, but more out of stupidity and too much curiosity rather than malice. He is one of the more sociable, though, and a very friendly fellow who’s good at making friends, as long as they can put up with his seemingly-endless energy.

#I've got more but I'm tired #guilty gear #AU #mermaids #jack-o valentine #Axl Low #I-no #Raven #sol badguy #ky kiske #sin kiske #Potemkin #Faust #guilty gear may #Johnny Sfondi #Anji Mito #Baiken #chipp zanuff #Illyria Aquarium AU

41 notes · View notes