#despite the trigger warning i promise this is actually funny

[ohbutwheresyourheart]

continuing the fragments from the google docs series: yugi is caught in a horrific depression spiral after the ceremonial duel and finally hits rock bottom, until everyone's favourite ceo sticks his nose in. fem!yugi because... I don't even remember, I think I just felt like it.

tw: suicide attempt

The ground suddenly looked very, very far away. Which it should; she was only a couple of floors below the penthouse. Would have gotten the penthouse, had a certain someone not booked it before her, probably before the circuit for this year’s world championships were even announced.

Except it brought to mind one of those statistics that got bandied around on self-help sites about the Golden Gate Bridge, and the drop being long enough to pass right through suicidal ideation into oh-fuck-why-did-I-jump.

Yugi didn’t think she’d renege, and the point was sort of that even if she did it wouldn’t make a difference, but it made her stomach twist to think she might. That it might be something hard-wired into her brain rather than a conscious decision. It was all chemicals, after all; maybe the fear of death was just something the chemicals bullshitted together despite all good reason after the last drops of dopamine ran out.

She shifted from one foot to the other, her hands sweaty on the absurdly fancy Romanesque column.

God, how much easier it would be if she could just will her heart to stop beating. No fuss. No mess. Just here one minute, gone the next. She’d thought the next best thing was an overdose, until she read a well-meaning forum post about the after-effects. Yes, and the pain, because she was simultaneously brave enough and coward enough to admit she wanted it painless; dared to go as far as to think she deserved it to be painless, really.

Why should it hurt to make things right?

Yugi closed her eyes and listened. Distant music and muffled voices floated up from the open windows on the floors below. Traffic blared on the roads. The fan in her bedroom hummed white noise behind it all. She breathed in something floral they’d scented the hotel rooms with and, below it and more familiar, what she’d always thought of as the smell of a city. Fast food – pizza, burgers, something garlicky – and emissions mixed with something else she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Life.

Well. So long, and thanks—

Yugi shrieked like a scalded cat as she was pulled backwards off the balcony wall. Eyes snapping open, she fought instinctively against the hands gripping her elbows. As soon as she was on the floor again, she was released, and turned to see – oh.

“What the fuck, Seto?”

She wasn’t sure what annoyed her most: that Seto Kaiba had managed to get into her locked hotel room, that he had done so without her noticing, that he had interrupted her immaculately planned suicide attempt, or that he had done all of that with a bored, slightly irritated expression on his face.

“I was getting sick of watching you grandstand,” he said. “If you were going to jump, you would have jumped.”

Seto turned away and kept talking, pacing across the balcony and gesturing, but Yugi stopped hearing him. She stopped hearing anything. Pure, unadulterated rage managed what all the calm, logical reasoning in the world could not.

Yugi leaped over the balcony.

She almost didn’t make it. The balcony wall was higher than she could comfortably jump, even with a few steps of a running start, and her feet caught it on the way over. For a dizzying moment, Yugi was suspended over the glittering downtown lights, and then gravity took over. Her stomach lurched, her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest, and yes there was that sudden spark of horror, of internal screaming, of nononononono---

Then a hand caught her leg and momentum slammed Yugi into the wall below face-first, hard enough to drive all the breath from her lungs. The momentary red mist cleared and her hearing kicked back in just in time to hear Seto scream:

“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”

Which, Yugi had to admit, was a very fair and extremely good question.

Drop me, she thought desperately. Please just fucking drop me.

But Seto Kaiba had never been accommodating in his life and he wasn’t about to start now. With a remarkable show of strength for such a wiry man, he hauled her back up over the railing by her ankles and dumped her on the balcony, red-faced and panting.

“That wasn’t - a - rhetorical - question - by the way,” he gasped as Yugi dropped her head into her hands and wished, intensely, for the sweet kiss of death. “What - and I cannot - stress this - enough - is wrong with you?”

Yugi sighed and forced herself to look up at him. There were so many things she could say. The truth. A host of lies, some more ridiculous than others. Something like the truth, without mentioning Atem. But in the end what came out of her mouth was:

“You ought to know better than to tell me I don’t have the guts to do something.”

Seto opened his mouth. Closed it again. Sighed. Pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I don’t have words,” he began in a tone that implied every word was being dragged out of him like a rotten tooth, “For how much I hate that I know you’re right. But even for you, this is extreme.”

Yugi sighed and leaned her head back against the balcony railing. She felt completely drained of every possible emotion. The attempt was ruined. All she wanted to do now was to be left alone to sleep.

“It’s possible,” she admitted, “That I’m not entirely in my right mind.”

Seto scoffed. “You don’t say.”

Then, instead of leaving, or lecturing her, or calling security, or any of the reasonable actions Yugi would have expected Seto Kaiba to take after witnessing - and averting - a suicide attempt, he got down and sat beside her, knees drawn up to his chest.

“I knew there was something wrong with you lately, but I didn’t think it was this.”

Yugi looked across at him, frowning. “What do you mean, you knew something was wrong?”

Seto shrugged. “It was obvious, as soon as I started looking at the footage from your duels. You’d stopped caring.”

“Yeah,” Yugi sighed, because there was no point hiding it and there was a certain relief in admitting it. “Yeah, that’s about right. Why do you care, though? Other than the tournament, I mean… is this just for the sake of the tournament?”

“It certainly wouldn’t help our advertising campaign if the current champion pitched herself off the tallest building in the city,” Seto conceded. He shifted slightly and looked across at her. “If I left, would you just jump right back over again?”

“Would you believe me if I said no?”

“No. I was mostly just curious about whether you'd admit it or not.”

“Ha.” Yugi looked down at her knees, considering. “...I don’t know. Maybe. You sort of ruined the moment.”

Seto let out a bark of laughter. He held up a hand as Yugi shot a glare at him, looking genuinely apologetic as he tried to rein himself in.

“You--You said that like I - fuck - like I came in and tore down your mood lighting.”

Oh fuck. Oh fuck, it did sound like that, didn’t it? Yugi tried to hold onto the seriousness of the moment - or at least her anger - but it was rapidly slipping through her fingers, replaced by a bubble of laughter of her own.

“You bastard,” she managed to get out before dissolving into giggles. “As a matter--heh--of fact it--it was my… mood music.”

That did it - within seconds they were both howling with laughter, the tension seeping out of them little by little, until they were clutching their stomachs with tears in their eyes.

----

He stayed with her all night. Yugi tried to protest but Seto just told her not to be ridiculous and made himself comfortable (or, at any rate, as comfortable as possible) in an armchair he pulled up near the bed.

(It wasn’t until the next day that Yugi realised he’d put it there to be between the bed and the balcony door.)

It should have been awkward, laying there with Seto Kaiba watching her like a hawk in the wake of a suicide attempt. They were friends (at least, Yugi kept insisting they were friends), but it wasn’t like the easy platonic intimacy that existed between Yugi, Joey, Tea, and Tristan. The four of them had had innumerable sleepovers, oftentimes sharing beds during their various journeys. Seto, though? Yugi could barely imagine him in pyjamas.

(Actually, that was a lie. She’d put money down that he owned Blue Eyes White Dragon print pyjamas. With a pair of matching slippers.)

And yet. Maybe it was just that the absurdity of the evening transgressed all other boundaries. Whatever the reason, it was… fine. Comfortable, even. The silence got a bit wearing after a while, so Yugi asked Seto to talk about -- something. Anything. He launched into a comprehensive monologue about the technological updates in the latest Duel Disk, which Yugi listened to with genuine interest, even asking a few questions, until the shop talk lulled her enough that her adrenaline drained away and she dozed off.

When she woke up the next morning he was still there; asleep, or so she thought, until she shifted and his eyes snapped open. They stared at each other for a few moments until Yugi attempted a weak smile.

“How’s your back doing?”

“It’s--” Seto began, stretching, only to cut off with a hiss. “...In one piece.”

So was Yugi. It seemed unbelievable now, in the soft morning light, how close she’d come to death the night before. Like a story that had happened to somebody else.

#fragments from the google docs #yugioh #seto kaiba #yugi mutou #despite the trigger warning i promise this is actually funny #black comedy funny sure #but still funny #(until you remember seto probably has horrible unacknowledged trauma about watching someone jump to their death...) #rivalshipping

[erideights]

Little pieces here and there (5)

Pairing: Buggy x Fem!Reader (One Piece Live Action)

Chapters: one, two, three, four

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: light flirting, light metion of sex, a lot of feelings, super fluff (in their particular way)

A/N: I'M BACK WITH THE NEW AND LAST (????) CHAPTER OF THE SERIES AFTER AN HIATUS WEEK. I wanted to post something good, something beautiful, true to the characters and the story you all enjoyed reading as much as i writing! (sorry for the possible grammatical mistakes!)

Side note: this chapter is to be read with different time frames, so changing the lights of the room and their resting positions in bed!

"Say it."

"Nope."

"Why not!?" he whines, his beautiful dove eyes pleading. "C'mon baby. Say it. I deserve it. All the awards. All the honors." The fact he’s beneath her, trapped between her body and the mattress, doesn't help make him look less submissive. She has to admit, it’s extremely pleasant to see how his dignified ass drags himself for her.

"But it would be a lie," she says, sticking out her tongue in a gesture intended to make him suffer a little more. Unbelievable that this is the same man who forced her to beg for sex a couple of hours ago. "and I’m no liar."

''Didn't seem like a lie to me when you were moaning my name and cumming on my cock for the third time some minutes ago.'' Ah, there it is, his ego is back again. Or at least, a glimpse of it. Took a while to appear. 

In front of him, (Y/N) just smiles devilishly, which makes Buggy growl and look at her with pleading eyes again. "Look, we already established I know and even like how you need to play difficult, it's part of your charisma, but I need to hear it, okay? I will give you anything your wayward, fussy heart could desire. Consider it a prize."

''Anything?''

''Anything.''

Hmm. She plays along, and pretends to think about it for long, torturous seconds, shaking her head from side to side in slowmo, taking a deep breath. 

As expected, soon enough she decides to give in-- she’s satisfied after making him beg in her own particular way.

''Fine.'' She takes a breath and starts her dramatic performance, with one hand on her own chest, eyes closed. ''Oh, Buggy, you were right, you are the best lover I’ve ever had, thanks to you my soul has ascended and I have seen the One Piece.''

That is not the praise he was expecting about his sexual skills. Not even close. But was so /him/, so dramatic, exaggerated, and incredibly hilarious, that despite faking offense on his face, eyes half-closed, lips pressed together, fingers pinching her hips as punishment, he has to admit -he will not-, was funny.

''You're a moron'' That’s about everything he has to say on the matter.

‘’Like Ol’Axe-Hand?’’ She asks, raising an eyebrow, hoping he gets it. And of course he does. He's so surprised that he widens his eyes, smirking. Is she actually admitting how incredibly funny he is? ''You still remember that joke?''

''Was so bad it stuck with me since then like a fucking nightmare.'' Hit and sunk.

''Ouch''

"Don't worry, there's still time to improve the quality of your jokes. But for now I'll take the prize you promised.''

''Ugh, fine. What do you want?’' Buggy thinks he knows (Y/N), so he’s convinced she will ask for something impossible. A challenge that will ridicule him or an astronomical sum of money. ''If what you want are berries I’m sorry to inform you, sunshine, I'm broke, I still have to find...'' but the clown shuts himself when he feels the girl's fingers slowly caressing his sharp jaw, finally pulling him by his chin towards her. He leans in too, eyes fixed on her lips, yearning for the kiss he can see so clearly written in the dreamy way she looks at him.

There’s no need to announce it, nor to start it with their usual flirting or provocations. It's slow and doesn't demand anything at all, nor is intended to be the trigger of their next round.

It's just a kiss. Something so simple and intrinsically complex at the same time. And in the same way as if it had been the most fiery and passionate of his life, as not long ago, this kiss leaves him breathless, unable to form a single coherent thought that has nothing to do with her.

Oh, he’s down bad. Just like she is.

              …

And there they are on the mattress, she’s sitting on his lap, legs around him, his hands on her hips, hers on his abdomen in a relaxed pose. The scene is typical of two lovers who have known each other for a lifetime -or at least for years- and not of two people who just had the wildest sex of their lives less than a couple hours ago. For the first time. 

They tell each other anecdotes, surreal stories, and laugh together inside that little bubble they don't even know how it was created, where it came from, or how the hell it could have absorbed them so much, making them completely ignore the outside world.

"What do you mean a giant bird!?" she screams in laughter, her stomach hurting, her lungs burning. "Aha, yeah, laugh all you want but imagine thinking that you’re about to die turned into damn bird feed. It would fucking piss me off."

As it can’t be otherwise, (Y/N) ends up laughing until she cries with the story of how Buggy arrived at Loguetown, and the clown finds himself exaggerating his story more and more with each laugh he manages to get from the girl, eager to hear it again, knowing he’s the only cause of this beautiful melody.

It’s absurd how he would love -kill- to know more about her, ‘cause if he stops to think about it, he doesn't know this woman at all. He knows nothing beyond her name, her crew, and the fact that she has a bold sense of humor. She’s brave and sarcastic, keen, sharp, and much more intelligent and savvy than -in his opinion- all the idiots around her.

And this is how and when he realizes the post-nut clarity theory hasn't worked for him. Getting her out of his twisted mind will not be as easy as fucking her a couple times, get his needed ton of personal satisfaction from making her beg for him, and moving on to the next thing to do/achieve on his list.

Goddamnhim.

"Alright, as much as I love and enjoy being the main character, it's time for you to drop your femme fatale facade and show me who you truly are."

"Awh,’’ she smiles tenderly, reaching for one of his cheeks. ‘’you see me like a femme fatale? That's so cute."

"Cut the crap.’’ The clown slaps her hand away, not in a violent way, but offended. ‘’You're not easily intimidated and I noticed you're good with knives too. That's sexy, and it makes me curious as hell about what you did before you joined those shitty heads."

Fair enough, she would be curious too, so she thinks about it, a bit wary of talking about her private life because there is a part of her that prefers to keep it intact -in case she wants to come back to it-. However, she reasons, mentioning what she did without being very specific doesn’t reveal anything at all. It would piss her off if Buggy casually knows her mercenary name -by which she’s fairly known among marines and pirates alike- and connects some dots all of a sudden. 

Is he actually that smart?

"I was a mercenary." She says calmly, shrugging her shoulders. "With that angelic face?" He retorts in disbelief, raising both eyebrows, even though he knows it fits her personality just right. "You'd be surprised what you're capable of with it."

"No, no, I actually believe you." He cracks an amused smile, looking directly into her eyes after carefully scanning her face. ''I mean, If someone like you tried to sneak onto my ship I would know it’s a trap, either to kill me or to steal from me but I would end up saying ''whatever you say beautiful'' and would actually let you do your thing.''

He's an idiot but still, once again, he manages to make her laugh. “Looking like that, anyone would give you anything,” he adds because he is, in fact and undoubtedly, willing to give her a little more of himself. More time and more attention, because he should definitely be out there gathering his crew -only God knows what they'll be doing- and figuring out how to get to the Grand Line without a damn map.

The idea of asking her, or even suggesting she steals it for him, doesn't even cross his mind. Not even after having shared this /intimate/ afternoon together. He knows she won't do it, she doesn’t own him shit, she’s not one of these women who fall in love and suddenly do everything, and leave everything behind, for the man of their dreams.

And of course Buggy can see the way she looks at him, without an ounce of contempt or distaste for his extravagant appearance or the atrocities he's sure she knows he's committed and of which he's not one bit ashamed. She sees him as he is and still, she’s here, offering him back something as valuable as her time and company.

But she won't give him more, he is aware of that. That's why he didn't offer (Y/N) to run away with him when he escaped from Arlong Park, because as much as she enjoys his company and maybe, just maybe, the clown imagines, feels something for him, he has the impression she’s a disgustingly loyal person, to her principles and her people, and as much as she likes to flirt with him, she would have said no.

He must admit, that's also how he likes her. Strong, capable, independent. He would kill no matter who to have her by his side as part of his crew, although he knows it won't happen. He would settle, however, with the -hypothetical- opportunity to meet from time to time on the high seas or on any random island. To sneak away from their crews in secret, to disappear for a few hours in which all his attention, his entire being, could focus on her, lower the curtain just a little, leave the spotlight behind and relax.

There is a small part of him, the one that makes him unable to stop looking intensely at her with those blue eyes that mirrors his own soul, that truly hopes she feels the same.

…

''You know'' she starts, absently stroking his hair, the clown's head in her lap. ''I imagine-- no, I know the whole nose topic is a sensitive thing for you but honestly, it shouldn't-- big noses are incredibly attractive, and yours? Believe me, anyone would want to sit on it.’’

What.

He's so taken aback by the suddenness of the comment he completely forgets what they were talking about before and on top of that, he's unable to reply for some seconds, looking at her like she just started speaking in another, incomprehensible language.

He ends up raising an eyebrow, running his tongue over his red lips. ''Including you?''

''Including me''

''Well, sunshine, today's your lucky day then'' Sitting up, in a blink of her eyes he turns, catches the girl's hips and drags her with him, lying down, leaving her sitting on his chest while he rest his head on the pillow. Buggy winks at her, licking his lips again, this time cheekily rather than thoughtfully. “I’m about to make another one of your dreams come true.”

''Horny bastard.'' she whispers, swallowing saliva. What a view, having him between her legs again. ''Never denied, sweetheart'' with a low, erotic, and breathtaking laugh, he surrounds both her thighs with his arms and pulls her body up in a quick movement, causing a sudden brush of his nose against the inside of her thigh.

(Y/N) shudders and takes a deep breath, spreading her legs a little further as she settles them on the pillow. ''Show me what else you can do, captain.'' To that he just groans, already getting hard with just having her on top of his face and her way of talking to him, pushing his buttons just the right way.

In no time she’s a complete, total, and absolute mess, writhing with pleasure. Hands grabbing his hair, hips rocking over his mouth, forcing his nose to rub against her clitoris, she softly moans his name, an occasional insult or any other possible blasphemy.

''Oh, fuck-- Buggy.''

…

Worn off makeup all around her body, sun setting, long hours spent together in which they have told funny, long stories about each other's life and of course, in which they have ended up letting free -once again- that suffocating sexual tension that attracts them to the other like a month to a lamp. Buggy, surprisingly, ends up letting his guard down to the point where he falls asleep, and not long after, he starts snoring.

(Y/N) knows, it's time to leave and look for her friends. She also knows she warned them about her obsession with the city and that the chances of her getting lost were high, and in that case they should not worry about her, blablabla, because she would come back sooner or later. She didn’t even remotely expect the reason for her disappearance would be a self-declared enemy -Luffy’s enemy- of her crew, tho. Neither was she going to spend so much time away from them to be with him.

The excuses she will need to cover her tracks are endless, and a pain in the ass without even started to think about them yet.

Will Zoro still be lost somewhere on the island? Because she obviously assumed, he got lost as soon as they split.

Still in bed, she takes a moment to calmly look at him. (Y/N) is aware of how this may be the last time they ever see each other, and -not- surprisingly, this thought sparks a pang of sadness in her. She really likes him. She wouldn't say she is in love with him, because those are big words and they barely know each other yet, but... he was right, the chemistry between the two was something impossible to deny. And it hasn't weakened, nor disappeared a single bit after sex. Quite the opposite-- It has become something more, a kind of deep and sincere fondness that in this precise moment, dark outside, distant voices over the window from drunkards and bastards around the streets, his breathing calm for a fraction of second, his eyes closed and the fresh breeze that enters the room, invites her to caress his blue hair while he sleeps, sighing.

It’s been a long, long time since (Y/N)’d enjoyed this kind of genuine, absolute peace, sharing with someone she cares about, a room where time does not exist and life is just a thought instead of reality.

Part of her wishes or better said, acknowledges, she would stay here the entire night if she could. The other says that’s ridiculous, and that those are her hormones talking and nothing else. It would pass.

But does she want it to pass? To fade away?

Finally getting out of bed -all her willpower at once- after long minutes in which she simply memorizes every possible detail around her, she begins to retrieve her clothes scattered throughout the room and get dressed in silence, trying not to wake him up.

Through all this process, in the depths of her head resonates a single thought, ringing as loud and strong as an alarm. She’s unable to shut it up. She can’t ignore it either. It's another kind of thought she shouldn't have, and at the same time… feels so natural, so logical, she doesn't feel guilty for having it.

But should she listen to it? Should she follow it?

Taking a seat in the chair that fulfilled its great purpose a few hours ago, she sighs, again, head resting on her hand, elbow on the table. With a small smile, her eyes fall back on that ridiculous, snoring clown. And then, she just knows.

Reaching to a little secret pocket in her pants, she takes out a small piece of folded paper and starts to open it slowly, being careful to not tear it apart, leaving it on the table of the room once the copy of the map of the Grand Line can be perfectly seen. When (Y/N) suggested her crew make a couple of copies in case something happened to the original, she never thought she would use hers like this, but she doesn't regret it in the slightest.

Biting the tip of her tongue, her eyes scan the partially darkened room, jumping from side to side. When she finally finds what she was looking for, she leans over the table, and taking the pen from the inkwell, she writes in the upper right corner of the map "I will be waiting for you right here, come find me" .

If someone asked her why she does this, why she feels this, why does she decide to ignore her common sense and give something so important to someone as -objectively- miserable as him, she would simply answer that there are things… or better said-- not things, but the little pieces here and there, pieces of himself left in her during conversations, shared glances, laughter, flirts, light touches and the deep strong ones that came after those. It's the way he tried to make her laugh at all costs or how he didn't give up trying to win her over. Those blue eyes so intense she would swear, they reached her soul, or the small, genuine smile she knows she has seen this same afternoon, really far from the forced, crooked, exaggerated ones he usually has.

It is all of this and much more, and opening the door of the room, closing it again so that no one disturbs Buggy while she escapes the building and heads to her ship to find her crew, she knows she can't wait to see him again.

She knows she will. Her sixth sense tells her so.

#the gif is an spoiler of the morning after #buggy the clown #buggy one piece #buggy the clown fanfiction #buggy x you #op buggy #one piece live action #one piece x reader #captain buggy #buggy x reader

[idyllic-affections]

platonic requests you say?! well,, how about xiao or scaramouche (or both hehe but just do whichever one you’re more inspired for!) with a child reader that’s kinda like a little sibling figure for them, who just follows them around aimlessly & doesn’t listen when they’re told to go away until Big Brother Figure has to accept that they just have this Stray Child attached to them now?! thank you if you decide to do this!! <3

what's with this sassy, lost child?

summary. scaramouche is not a good person.

trigger & content warnings. implied child abuse and canon-typical scara lore.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. found family, fluff, alight angst (?). scaramouche & child!reader. 0.5k words. they/them pronouns used for reader.

author's thoughts. the title is funny; the brainrot is... less funny.... anyways, anon i love this idea! i ended up only doing scara as i had a lot of trouble with getting ideas for xiao's part? its weird since i really like xiao but i had no inspiration for him. additionally, i only wrote about fatui!scara rather than wanderer!scara. if you ever want a wanderer!scara version of this, just shoot me another request and ill be happy to do it <3 this ended up being kind of similar to a character study, which i find super interesting actually. it wasn't meant to be like that but i think its kinda cool c:

scaramouche is not a good person.

he has no issue admitting to this—he is cruel, violent, and temperamental and has no qualms with resorting to methods equally so to get what he wants. despite this... he will not commit crimes against children. that is one thing il dottore, the man very much responsible for his present state of mind, does that he won't.

the balladeer will never be caught dead being the one to take away a child's innocence and hope.

a child's innocence is unlike that of any other. it is fragile and delicate and something to be protected rather than battered and bruised. he didn't get to bask in his own innocence for very long; his view of the world around him began to skew towards darkness the moment ei threw him out as if he was nothing more than a doll that lost its novelty. he knew all too well what it felt like to be thrown away.

maybe that's why he kept them around.

"what are you doing?" he demands, turning to the kid he begrudgingly settled on keeping around. it was mostly just to spite the ignorant fatui agent that had tried to assault them after finding them lost in a research camp. it... definitely had nothing to do with the fact that he saw himself in them, that he saw kunikuzushi staring back at him when he looked down at them. not at all. definitely not, because empathy was something the balladeer absolutely did not have the capacity for.

(deep down, he knows he's only lying to himself. number six was once so gentle and kind and curious. he wasn't always this way.

regardless of how he feels about it, kunikuzushi will always be a part of him.)

"it's raining," is all they say in reply, scooting closer to the harbinger. he shoves them away with gentleness unheard of from someone like him, and they whine, adding on, "it's not even warm rain. it's cold."

"freeze, then."

their lower lip juts out into an intentionally overdramatic pout at that. "big brother's so mean to me..."

he glares down at them.

he does not, however, offer any opposition other than a soft scoff when they scoot back under his hat.

scaramouche's sharp glare redirects to a fatuus that stared at them a little too long as he rests a hand on their head, calloused fingertips rubbing little circles into their damp scalp. they seem happy with the contact—happy enough not to notice the way their guardian's eyes narrow further at the foolish, unmoving agent. it's a warning, an unspoken threat, a promise of a fate worse than death if his underling does not back off. the fatui agent seems to understand well enough, scurrying to get back to work.

the balladeer's hands are drenched in an inconceivable amount of blood and tears that no amount of rain will wash away—some belonging to him, but the majority belonging to his victims. he fears that the crimson will spread onto them like some kind of disease, consuming whatever innocence they have that he's tried so hard to preserve. the worst part is that he knows his fear isn't irrational. even a worm will turn.

number six of the fatui harbingers does not remember what it means to be gentle, but for them...

he's willing to try.

he's desperate to try.

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion brainrots 🌸 #aphelion's requests 🌸 #favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #scaramouche x child reader #scaramouche x reader #platonic scaramouche x reader #platonic genshin x reader #genshin x reader #genshin x child reader #platonic genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin impact #fatui harbingers x reader #scaramouche x you

[yanderes-galore]

Can I ask for a TFP Wheeljack with human reader alphabet :3

I love TFP Wheeljack's design. 🥺 Sure! More Transformer/Human! I hope I get his character right.

If I didn't write him right, I'd appreciate tips on writing TFP! Wheeljack :)

Alphabet Here

Yandere Alphabet - TF:P! Wheeljack

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Human/Transformer pairing, Kidnapping, Overprotective behavior, Violence/Potential murder if you squint, Forced relationship/companionship, Possessive behavior, Jealousy, Isolation.

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Wheeljack takes time to get used to humans. Even more so if his obsession is over such a tiny creature compared to him. He tends to show his affection through protection due to being such a strong wrecker. He seems hesitant to guard you, a human, but you grow on him.

Honestly now he understands why Bulkhead likes these humans so much.

Wheeljack could get intense at times. He's dropped teamwork for the longest time before coming to Earth. Now he has to have a human partner?

You're so fragile but he promised Bulkhead that he'd take care of you.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Wheeljack can take on hordes of Vehicons. He's a wrecker and willing to take on anything.

If he had to defend you then he'd give it his all. He doesn't entirely care if other humans get hurt while he defends you, however.

So... Wheeljack doesn't mind getting messy in the slightest.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Wheeljack would try to act as your protector. Again, he's still trying to get back into teamwork, which makes him distant at times.

He does enjoy his human despite your differences. He's big, strong, and scarred... you're small, weak, yet innocent. Wheeljack may tease you but you've done nothing to make him mock you.

He likes to tease you about how you need him... which seems like teasing to him but terrifying to you as he abducted you.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

You can't go anywhere without the large wrecker. His obsession started as a promise for a friend, now he genuinely cares for you.

Wherever you go Wheeljack promises to swap to his vehicle mode and drive you. You protest yet he never relents.

Essentially, you're always forced to the Autobot's side against your will. He doesn't really care about your opinions about it, either.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Wheeljack is going to start off cold and uncaring. Humans aren't his thing, he's just here to clear the area of Decepticons.

Although when Bulkhead introduces you to him and asks Wheeljack to help defend you, the Autobot took you begrudgingly.

Anything for a friend, right?

Turns out, you proved to be a useful scout at first, reporting to Wheeljack for enemy locations. This makes him respect you a bit more... for a human.

Wheeljack would start as uncaring what happens to you, he'd never hear the end of it from Bulkhead. Although... when he starts realizing he does care for you...?

He cares for you quite a bit, even becoming more vulnerable when Decepticons find out about you. He may not be able to love you exactly like a fellow human would, but he does care for you deeply.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

He actually wants to see how far you get. It's never far and your arguments are very one-sided.

He just likes to sit and watch his human vent words that don't hurt him in the slightest. You're only hurting yourself when you try to hit him, too.

When you're done he asks if you're exhausted before scooping you back into his hand and holding you there.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

Not really a game. He finds your resistance to his care funny at times but doesn't mean it as a game. Escape is even funnier, so he may make it a small game.

Humans act like they're so independent... when in reality they're dependent on much stronger creatures to defend them.

Are you even aware of how much danger you'd be in without him?

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Maybe Wheeljack getting too reckless and accidentally harming you. This is what stops him from making you a scout, quickly trying to find enough research to patch you up.

Him forgetting humans are so fragile can be such a fatal mistake....

That or Wheeljack locking you in his vehicle mode when he kidnaps you onto his ship from your home. You're squirming around, trying to unlock doors or break windows. With a sigh he's locking you down into your seat and driving off.

That's another potential bad experience you could have.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Wheeljack doesn't think of the future much. He's an Autobot that likes to live in the present. Although... he does like the idea of remaining your protector.

He isn't sure if he sees you like a pet or some sort of romantic partner. You're adorable and he doesn't mind spending time with you unlike other humans.

Any future where he can keep you and continue fighting is a good future to him.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

He... admittedly... dislikes other humans around you. He knows they're your own kind but maybe he's a bit irritated you might choose to stay here with them. He'd cope... but he'd much rather find Decepticons to fight.

A dark part of him wishes he could just squish those other humans or break other Cybertronians to keep you to himself, however.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

When he first meets you, he treats it like babysitting. He hates doing it, despite you trying your best to get along with him.

When he becomes obsessed with you he's protective. He tosses aside his reckless and uncaring feelings for humans when it comes to you and likes to care for you.

He'd sit you in his palm or shoulder, sitting in his ship or on the ground of Earth to just... hold you.

He experiments with patting your head or poking your chest lightly, he also doesn't mind it when you give him affection too.

He can be a cold and ruthless protector but attempts to shake off his more warrior-like side to appeal to you.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

He met you through Bulkhead and thought taking care of you as a chore. Then you grew on him... and he decided to just take you everywhere.

He acts like a bodyguard/guardian as most Autobots would, but he can get carried away with his fighting spirit....

Essentially his attitude towards you changes from "This is such a chore..." to "I need to defend you and your tiny life."

You'll notice it when he starts paying more attention to you. He listens to you intently and fights to protect you more than ever before. It feels strange for him to say he loves you... yet he does.

Just be patient. He'll come around at some point, for better or for worse.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

A bit, yeah. He can be caring, it's just strange to see it towards a human. Other humans he's neutral with... unless they try to take you away from him.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Locking you up. He can lock you in his vehicle mode or his ship, the Jackhammer. Either way, he'll keep you with him with no chance of seeing other bots or humans until you start listening.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Many of them. If you want protection, then you're sticking with him

You'll get some amount of privacy, however.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Wheeljack has limited patience in the start, but when fully in his obsession he's patient.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Yes... with time. Like most yanderes, if you're still alive, he'll never let you go. If you die... he actually mourns. Bulkhead has never seen Jackie so sad over a human....

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Not really, he views it as another form of protection. He could let you go but you'd need to be watched over.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Unknown. He probably grew to enjoy humans like the rest of the Autobots and got obsessive about the idea of protecting you/how easy it is to lose you or something.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

He watches you, blue optics scanning over your fear for him. He then tries to make himself appear smaller (crouching, attempting to be less threatening like you're a scared animal) and tries to comfort you. His only option may be to just leave you alone for now, though.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

Yes, although a lot of him is different from the classic yandere. Where do you start?

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Asking to see the other Autobots in private then just spilling how he's been treating you, maybe?

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Unintentionally. He still needs to understand how fragile you humans are.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

He doesn't worship you or care how you view your little arrangement.

What are you going to do about it? Fight him?

Face it... you're his now.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

Wheeljack doesn't really snap. But I can imagine it would be a long time.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Not intentionally.

#yandere transformers prime #yandere transformers #yandere tfp wheeljack #yandere tfp

[best-underrated-anime]

Best Underrated Anime Group J Round 1: #J2 vs #J7

#J2: Two girls wander the post-apocalyptic world.

Amid the desolate remains of a once-thriving city, only the rumbling of a motorbike breaks the cold winter silence. Its riders, Chito and Yuuri, are the last survivors in the war-torn city. Scavenging old military sites for food and parts, the two girls explore the wastelands and speculate about the old world to pass the time. Chito and Yuuri each occasionally struggle with the looming solitude, but when they have each other, sharing the weight of being two of the last humans becomes a bit more bearable. Between Yuuri’s clumsy excitement and Chito’s calm composure, their dark days get a little brighter with shooting practice, new books, and snowball fights on the frozen battlefield.

#J7: Lecherous young man gets engaged to an alien princess

When aliens known as the Oni threaten to invade the Earth, they promise to leave under one condition—a randomly-chosen human must win a one-on-one game of tag against Lum, the beautiful daughter of the Oni leader. The “lucky” person selected happens to be the lustful and unlucky high-schooler Ataru Moroboshi. Given 10 days to attempt to grab Lum’s horns, Ataru realizes how impossible the challenge is as he is faced with Lum’s extraterrestrial powers.

Motivated by a promise of marriage from his childhood friend Shinobu Miyake, Ataru manages to catch Lum off guard. He mistakenly grabs hold of her bikini top first, but he eventually achieves his true goal. Although the game is over, Lum misunderstands that she is the one whom Ataru wants to marry, and she decides to move in with him. The poor student constantly tries to shake off the clingy Lum while doing his best to reconcile with his desired fiancée. After Ataru's heroic feat results in such a disastrous outcome, it is questionable whether luck will ever be on his side.

Titles, propagandas, trailers, and poll under the cut!

#J2: Girls’ Last Tour (Shoujo Shuumatsu Ryokou)

Propaganda:

Above everything else, this is a show about how human life and curiosity will continue to exist even in terrible circumstances. The two main characters are super charming, so following them around is fun, but even beyond that it’s just a gorgeous show. The scenery is often awe-inspiring and beautiful, as is the soundtrack. Despite the show taking place after the end of the world, it can be surprisingly uplifting as the girls (and the audience!) find wonder and joy in the world around them. Definitely a show more people should watch!

Trigger Warnings: There are some flashbacks that depict the war that ended the world, but they are not graphic. Some blood is shown, but not much else. Main characters own guns, though they don’t use them on other people.

#J7: Urusei Yatsura (2022)

Propaganda:

This anime is actually a reboot; the original came out in the 80s. It honestly does the manga justice compared to the 80s anime. I absolutely love the animation, it really does stick to Rumiko Takahashi’s art style. Though the pacing is a bit different, overall it stays true to its manga counterpart. (It’s honestly too bad the series isn’t very popular in the west, it’s a great comedy/harem type show. And the thing is, it’s not your traditional harem where “the basic guy gets all the girls” which makes the show so much more enjoyable.) Everything about this show really captures the essence of the series. It’s able to be funny while still having its more serious moments. I just really love Urusei Yatsura, it’s so good.

Trigger Warnings: The art style is very colorful and could cause eyestrain

If you’re reblogging and adding your own propaganda, please tag me @best-underrated-anime so that I’ll be sure to see it.

#anime #best underrated anime #polls #poll tournament #tournament #anime tournament #animation #animated show #group stage #group stage round 1 #tournament polls #group j #girls’ last tour #girls' last tour #shoujo shuumatsu ryokou #urusei yatsura

[projectbluearcadia]

Bugs... Suck!

[ Trigger Warning - Mentions of parasite infestation in the body. Reader Discretion Advised. ]

Annelie: Shit. 

Diavolo: He wouldn’t kill you, Annelie. I think. 

Lucifer: I think he would. 

Annelie: Seconded. 

Solomon: You should probably get out of here, Anne. 

Annelie: No shit, but where am I supposed to go? 

Solomon: Good question. 

Annelie: Not helping!

Diavolo: Cocytus Hall?

Annelie: Cocytus what?

Diavolo: It’s been disused for quite some time, but Barbatos won’t step foot in it. Lucifer knows where it is. Hurry. 

Lucifer: ...Satan, you’re in charge while I’m gone.

But you’re looking at Mammon. 

Satan: Eh? Me? 

Annelie: Diavolo, please keep me updated if you can. 

Diavolo: I will. I promise. And I’m so sorry, Anne. Really. 

Annelie shakes her head. 

Annelie: Dia, you’re my bestie, and I love you. When all of this blows over, let’s do something fun together. 

Diavolo nods, and Lucifer and Annelie head out of the house. 

Lucifer: This wasn’t the date I had in mind today.

Lucifer picks up Annelie and teleports her into an old, decrepit building before putting her down again.

Annelie: Me neither... especially not the... bugs. 

Lucifer glances at her. 

Lucifer: Are you trying to tell me that of all things, you’re scared of insects? 

Annelie: I-I’m not scared of them! I just... Something crawled up my leg! What is it?!

Annelie starts frantically batting at her pants and nearly screams at the Blatta orientalis on her leg. Lucifer sweeps it off her, and she hangs on to his shirt. 

Annelie: It’s not funny! Stop laughing! 

Lucifer: I can’t believe you...

Annelie: Shut up!  

Lucifer: ...

Annelie: ...sorry. You can un-shut up.

Lucifer: Well, it is a bit foul in here without the household pests, but it’s no wonder Barbatos won’t come in here.

Lucifer points at a sleeping rat the size of a large dog. 

Annelie: Oy vey. 

Lucifer: I imagine it’s been eating the carnivorous mushrooms growing in the walls. 

Annelie: Carnivorous—is it even safe here?!

Lucifer: Annelie, you can easily deal with anything living here even without my help. 

Annelie: I don’t want to! Please tell me nothing here can lay eggs in me!

Lucifer: Well I’d love to, but then I’d probably be lying to you. Though I’d be more worried about your own eggs, personally. 

Annelie: What? What eggs? Are they already in my brain? Lucifer, am I going to die?

Lucifer: ...you’re really stressed, aren’t you? Come here, you hysteric. 

Lucifer places his hand on Annelie’s back and pulls her up several floors while her eyes fearfully flit everywhere. 

Lucifer: The third floor is the least populated. 

Annelie: Why couldn’t we teleport there instead?!?!

Lucifer: Hm. Exposure therapy. 

Annelie smacks his shoulder, and he promptly and playfully smacks her ass. 

Lucifer: We talked about hitting, didn’t we, honey?

Annelie seems to relax. 

Annelie: ...sorry. 

Lucifer: That made you calm down?

Annelie: I’m not calm. I’m still paranoid about bug eggs. My skin's still crawling.

Lucifer: Well, I won’t let them lay eggs in you. 

Lucifer sits Annelie down onto a rock-hard mattress, and she takes a deep, shuddering breath. 

Annelie: I’m really sorry about... freaking out. 

Lucifer: Don’t be. Mammon still crawls into my bed sometimes when he’s scared. 

Annelie laughs. 

Annelie: What?

Lucifer: The last time was probably a decade ago, but he was so terrified after that horror movie that he snuck in my room when he thought I was sleeping and curled up on the end of my bed. When I saw him that morning, he pretended he was trying to steal my sheets.

Annelie: That’s actually adorable. 

Annelie pauses. 

That’s right. Mammon is his favorite, despite how much he constantly denies it. I guess they really are close, no matter how many times Mammon gets strung up from the ceiling like a demon pinata.

Annelie’s D.D.D. buzzes, and she checks her messages.

Diavolo: Barbatos took me back to the castle, and it seems like he doesn’t want me to see you for the foreseeable future. D:

Diavolo: I’m sorry, Ms. Glasgow, but this is the way it must be. Please do not contact him again. 

#seriously i hate bugs #except spiders #they eat bugs #obey me lucifer #irrational fears #obey me nightbringer #obey me shall we date #fanfiction #shameless self indulgence #obey me #obey me angst #LuciAnne

[madness-in-the-flesh]

Well now that I've seen that MAG/Go3lm post, it has invoked my affection for Go3lms. Go3lms are just neat and adorable. They talk so politely and whenever they make a remark I just want to give them headpats. -insert headpat meme with regular Go3lm-

While this has been just been me talking about Go3lms, I do have a request in mind. Would you be alright with doing something for the tower guards? They may be annoying to fight, but I respect the dedication to their medival gimmick. God they're such dorks, love these lads. (I really enjoyed the stories with the rowdy duo, Church and Jorge, and the ever passionate burger mascot, Gil. Just wanted to see if I could get some spotlight on some other Go3lms.) You're free to choose which guard to do, to just generalize how they'd all act, or however you'd like to go about it.

So here's a scenario, the reader works for Nexus Core as one of its many combatitive units. They interact with the tower guard now and then due to their patrol routes occasionally intersection. However, they notice it happening more often, bumping into eachother despite being stationed on different floors or in sections that they are quite sure aren't important enough to warrant the attention of the tower guard.

hjfbsdsedf I have to agree with you. They're all just. Funky and i love me some funky big guys +) Also head pats. They deserve ALLL OF THEM!!!

Oh shit! I never actually thought I'd be writing for these guys. but yeah, I'm happy too!! Wouldn't be surprised if they all played d&d together either... ( fuheyusf thank you!!! means a lot to hearrr <3 <3 ) Also hope it's cool but decided to go with the whole idea they are your fan club and went " we like this one. " and now you're being followed by them.

Beautiful scenario tho anon. I adore it. I'm gonna have LOTS of fun with this >+))) !!!!!! But genuinely this is super creative and cool??? You've got a big brain anon !!! <3 <3

I also can't tell if this is longer than my usual writing but it feels like it. nuihu

Tower Guards - The Point where it went wrong

Trigger Warnings - Manipulation, Intimidation, Abduction, Murder, Gore, Violence, Injury, Character death ( oc ), possible reader death. kinda.

Note - This one has the inclusion of two ocs of mine as your co-workers, Just kinda for the plot to feel more solid. Just really place holders but I promise both of them have a lot more depth than discussed in this story here lmao.

Many people in your situation would be asking " How did it get to this point ?" and frankly, not even you knew the answer. Maybe you could at least pin point the beginning. Something simple and from then on, they'd stuck with you. It had been a joke: Nothing too serious. You thought the way they talked, resembling that of the medieval ages, was kinda funny. Most were intimidated by them, sure they were skilled but you didn't seem to process that fear. You should have been terrified, And with what has happening now: You are.

" I think I'd make a great tower guard " you joked, puffing out your chest as the other shook their head, clearly unamused by your antics.

" Please don't do anything stupid around those G0l3ms. They will not hesitate to crush you " Theseus spoke, Rubbing the temple in irritation. The two of you were similar in some ways while opposite in others. While Theseus took a more serious approach. He just wanted to get the job done and head home. Most would have sighted this as a horrid combination seeing as you were light hearted. Possibly as juvenile as it gets which caused them immense stress but you two had gone back for years now. It was just... natural. Your shenanigans were unmatched while they balanced you out with their serious tone. To finish it off, Here you both were, working under the same branch in the science tower.

" By my troth, I shall try " You hummed out, elbowing your co-worker as you motioned a hand over your heart. A promise that now come to accidentally break. It caused them to groan but oddly enough, this caught the attention of the black guard, turning and staring back. The two of you jolted as the voice boomed through the room.

" Honourable! What is your name small one? " The blue guard questioned, hunching down to meet your size more. Cracking your head up, you blinked. Taken aback by the fact your simple choice of words had gotten you this much attention, face heating up at the newfound attention.

" Um... I'm (Y/n) " You spoke, rubbing the back of your neck as he let out a cheery laugh. Perhaps he was amused by your antics as much as you were.

" (Y/n)... I shall remember it well. " He hummed your name before letting the two of you go on your way. Youi hadn't paid too much attention to it, instead just snickering about it. While Theseus' eyes hadn't left the figure of the blackguard. It puzzled you, Making you raise a brow.

" You good? " You asked, genuinely concerned but he was clearly pondering his next set of words, choosing them carefully. He turned to face you as he shrugged.

" Dunno. Just got a bad feeling about those things. " he responded as you headed back. From then on, that bad feeling in them would grow and grow for him and no matter how much he protested, You didn't take him seriously. Even so, You never really took it seriously, sighting Theseus as just plain paranoid or just his usual overreacting. There was no away these G0l3m's would dream of harming some of the important Nexus scientists such as yourselves. right? You'd hoped that much. Maybe it was to cover your own tracks, trying to calm your friend down because if you weren't scared, perhaps he wouldn't be either. Perchance, if you had listened to him, things wouldn't have turned so sour.

From then on the guards would pop up at different intervals. It started out small, Just simple route changes you hadn't really payed attention towards since, like everyone else here, you had a job to do. It started happening more frequently though, Guards would stop by your station and ask how you were doing, simple things that... were nice to hear honestly but maybe not during working hours. After all, if you were caught, who knows what punishment you'd face. You weren't sure what to do about them either but soon chalked it up to them seemingly wanting to become acquainted with you after expressing interest, probably.

Some notable incidents were when a red guard had accidentally tripped and crushed what you were working on. You almost had a fit, Months of work down the drain but part of you didn't want to cause a scene with the large guard. You just laughed if off. It meant staying over hours. Apparently the guard had felt so bad, he started to hang around you during those hours on his rounds. Always stopping to check in on your which you found sweet. You were actually happy to have some new dedicated friends, even if it meant Theseus was less than thrilled. One comment made by him was " They planned that shit so you could be around more? " You had just chalked it up to them being clumsy but he still refused: Sighting it strange that the guards, who were already extremely agile, would make such a clumsy mistake. It didn't matter if it was on purpose or not though, You still had to come in to catch up more.

Another involved a yellow guard. You hadn't even properly picked up on it happening until another co-worker, Achilleas had told you. Apparently someone was talking about you behind your back about the red guard. How you had technically put the project on hold until it could be all redone: The guard that overheard this was NOT happy and apparently killed the. However the real reason was according to the report that was handed out to you and your co-workers: He was a spy. Planning on sharing information with others and leaking what you were doing to the public and with that, The yellow guard had taken him out. Theseus remained ambient it was a cover-up, With what you know now. He was most likely right. On the other hand, Achilleas was just glad he was gone: apparently he was a right asshole around the work place. Not that you knew the guy personally.

The worst out of them was meeting the Blackguard. He had an air of authority, more so than the others and he definitely didn't like your friends. You only ever saw it once though, He was so happy with you. As many of the guards were, polite, caring and a good time. A rare combination in Nevada but you were pleasantly surprised to find it home in the leader of the tower guard. Shame it didn't stay that way. He would hardly say anything when your companions were around. The three of you would talk, just minding your own business and he'd show up. Towering over all three of you in size and you knew it intimidated them, no matter how many times you tried to reassure them that it was fine. he'd be so pleasant with you, but when either Achilleas and Theseus tried to talk with him, The tone felt forced... You thought it was nerves maybe. That he wanted to perhaps get in with your little trio and didn't know the way about it. On the other hand. You knew the truth now. Although maybe it was obvious from the start as sometimes he'd drag you away to get you to talk to him alone until the alarm for your break being over sounded off. It soon developed into not just the blackguard doing so, but any guard that saw you chatting with the three in the breakroom. Sometimes they'd then be there, waiting for you. occasionally they'd escort you there and keep you away from the two but again: Maybe they were just shy. Neither of your friends liked this but Achilleas wasn't as bothered, going along with what you said because he trusted you - If you said they were harmless, then they were to him.

The last vague incident you could recall was noted with a blue guard. The same who you had encountered. He insisted that he escort you back to your office while you were on break. Previously, You were talking in the break room with some of your two closest work friends: Theseus and Achilleas. The three of you were talking about how your own individual lives outside your job were going, which relatively uninteresting apart from Achilleas story about a particularly amusing mattress salesmen. Just casual conversations. Only for the guard to stalk up behind the three of you. At first, you payed no mind to it. Only giving them a small wave before you heard the alarm, signalling breaktime was over and began to head back to your designated areas.

" I am here to escort you back to your workplace! " he spoke, filled with pride as the other two stared at the guard then each other. Achilleas looked slightly confused while Theseus' face was riddled with concern.

" Oh yeah sure. See you guys after work? " You replied before turning to the other two. They both nodded before beginning to head away. Theseus kept looking back: Clearly concerned for you but again. He's just a paranoid little man, or so now you wished it had just been his paranoia. You and the guard walked back, heading to the elevator. It was a journey filled with small talk. Nothing too special outside the usual talk you had with the respective guards. A question made you pause though.

" What are those two to you? Are they... Your protectors? " he prompted, tilting his head lightly. This made you laugh lightly, Deciding to play along with that you used to think was just some sort of medieval humour thing.

" Nahhhh. Theseus is like my champion. Achilleas is just one of those...uh, what you call it " You paused to think, looking away as you gathered your thoughts. Turning back when you remembered

" He's like my leech collector. Slimy little fuck sits there and collects them for me " you mused, snickering lightly at the small joke you had made. You wanted to keep up with them, humour and have fun with the whole medieval aesthetic but now. You wished you hadn't. The blue guard let out a small ' ahh ' in acknowledgement before going deadly silent. This... was new. While you were used to small talk, complete silence was unfamiliar.

You couldn't think about it long though as the elevator stopped and you got to your floor. Heading out the blue guard waved goodbye, saying something about a meeting he needed to attend. You brushed it off and just got back to work as usual and for a while. Things were normal besides the guards patrolling around your area getting more and more frequent but you weren't in charge of them. So it was none of your business

Then it came down to the day it all went wrong. Remembering the day in the breakroom once again, gathered with your usual buddies and talking about whatever came to mind at the current moment. Soon it trailed into the tower guards and the usual insistence with Theseus began. You were pretty much tired of it at this point, day in day out: Insisting they were no good. You'd become quite friendly with them so... You saw no problem with them.

" Oh shut up. " You huffed, taking a sip of your drink of choice. Not an office favourite, but it was yours. Theseus seemed to sigh, shaking his head.

" I'm serious, (Y/n). Somethings fucking up with them. They're following you around like a pack of lost puppies " He spoke up, causing Achilleas to gawk. Not at anything in particular. Theseus' eyes followed his, only for him to freeze up: Staring at whatever was behind you. The stare didn't stop, even as you took a quick look behind you, although the shadow that loomed over the three of you should have been very telling. You brushed it off, already accustomed to it only to double turn when you realized it was one of the G0l3m's that Theseus had been complaining about to your group mere moments ago.

This would not end well.

Something about the way the Blackguard loomed spoke volumes. The silence that spread through your group only made the air thicker. he G0l3m stared at your friend, Presumably if looks could kill: He'd be nothing but paste between his fingers.

" I challenge you, For (y/n)'s hand. " The Blackguard spoke up, The cold tone in their voice showed he was extremely serious with every single drop of venom spilling out of the sentence. Theseus stared in horror, just preparing to back up and out of the break room. Clearly intimidated by the larger thing. You didn't blame him because for the first time, The fear Theseus had felt: Infected you. The understanding of your friend's apprehension, made everything spin. Vomit threatened to rise out from your lips still you caught yourself, Swallowing it with your anxiety.

"I'm um. Busy " Theseus called, quickly darting out the room: Leaving the breakroom. It left both you and Achilleas staring up at the G0l3m who only turned to your other friend.

" Coward. What about thou? " You and Achilleas made eye contact, holding it for a moment before he turned to the now empty cup, holding the silence again while spinning his head to gawk at the large figure behind you.

" With all do respect, No thanks chief. " and he began rushing out of there: Not failing to toss his cup into the sink with a clash. Before leaving: A quick ' I'm so sorry ' was mouthed at you and your co-worker vanished beyond the same door as Theseus. The tension rose further, Making you laugh nervously. You had no idea how you were supposed to react, Staring up at the guard made you feel small. A lot smaller than every other time you had encountered the guard previously. The tension made everything just feel generally bigger. While it wasn't outright panic, the anxiety was lingering. He must be... messing around. After all how could someone you considered a friend, along with the other guards who had been nothing short of pleasant, hurt other people you considered friends.

I mean: You hated a few of your co workers but you wouldn't resort to cutting their lives short. You.... weren't like that. While you wanted to believe they wouldn't do the same, The way he looked down at you; No visible emotion, reminded you just what they were made to be. Killing machines that would slaughter anyone who not only defied Phobos, but got caught in places they shouldn't. You nervously played with your cup, looking away from him but you could still feel those eyes burning into the top of your head.

You had been saved by the alarm, signalling that your break was over and you once again laughed nervously. You tried to speak but the words were caught in your throat, Silently opening your mouth for nothing to come out. While you didn't want to believe you were scared, You were shaking now. The liquid in your cup jittering along with you and there was nothing you could do about it. Uncomfortably shifting as you decided instead to just wave: Almost dropping your cup in the process.

He came with you, practically talking to himself as you tried your best to respond but you just felt sick. You weren't sure where to pin point why but you couldn't shake the ever growing feeling that something bad would happen. Like a six sense. Maybe it was because you knew the guards so well, that they wouldn't stand for what Theseus was telling you. He disappeared once you got back to your work space. You remember placing the cup on the desk, no longer interested in it's contents. You weren't thirsty anymore. You thought that would have been the end of it. The strangest thing that happened that day and at this point - You were considering resigning. That look he gave Theseus unsettled you and now you felt like you were catching onto what he meant.

Hours passed, Up until it was the end of you shift. Excited to head home as you and Theseus had promised to spend the evening together watching the latest slaughter time re-run. Both you and he had agreed that the newer episodes lacked that little bit of pizazz the older ones had. So you waited outside for a while. 5 minutes turned into 10 minutes, which soon became half an hour and you were now suspicious. Theseus was never one to not let you know he'd be late. He just wasn't like that. If anything he had to be on time since he acted like being late was enough to get you executed. then again, Maybe you would since you were working for the Director. Wandering the halls once more to his office, Passing every clearance badge scan up until you walked into his small office. You weren't ready for what you saw. You don't think any amount of preparation would have though. For all the horrors you had seen in your time here: This one truly broke your heart.

Your friend Theseus had been alive earlier. You and Achilleas had been in the breakroom only a couple hours ago, trying to push past the incident with the blackguard as much as possible while you worked - A ping of guilt as you briefly remembered that the last words you heard from him were in fear of the blackguard - You should have done something to stop it sooner. However, here his body remained. Soaked in his own plasma. His head was detached from his body, having rolled across the floor at your feet. A plethora of blood having shot upwards out his neck and across the pale white walls. The knees of the body had buckled a while ago, no longer having the brain to hold itself up.

There his killer stood over the body. Holding himself as if he hadn't just killed your best friend of many years. The large G0l3m turned, facing you and laughing. You hadn't realized the trio gathering behind you either.

" I have bested your champion in battle! Thou shall now join our order! " The Blackguard pointed towards you, Causing you to cower away. No. no no no, You turned to run but a group of them lined the hallway. Your heart skipped a beat as you met the faces of more tower guards.

You screamed and kicked as they picked you up, struggling in the larger ones grip. The red guard was relentless and didn't let you go. The Blackguard leading the rest, along with you. Down the hallways with eager strides. At first confused, what did they plan on doing with you? Locking you up in some dingy dungeon? Were you going to become some sort of glorified house pet? The thoughts made you shiver and fight against him all the more. You quickly picked up on their plan though, once you saw the familiar look of the magnification chambers to which you silently screamed in terror. They wouldn't...

" They have volunteered for the process " one spoke, holding you up almost like a cat would a kitten. You didn't stop kicking and yelling: Finally realizing the genuine danger you were in. You knew what entailed you if you were to enter it. You'd be kept in the place for days, possibly weeks. If your body couldn't handle it: You'd die. If you did, then you wouldn't be yourself. You'd only be a shell, Left to fill with whatever the scientists or environment deemed fit - They'd stitch your skin and stretch it over your flesh to make it adapt to your new size. You shook your head " no " hopping that one of your fellow scientists would understand. No empathy was spared as they nodded and gave the guard the go ahead.

You continued to struggle up until you were thrown into the corner, Slamming into the wall with a thud as you slid down. Your eyes already droopy from the ongoing pain in the back of your head. The last glance you got was that of the Blackguard. The same way he was positioned during your first meeting.

" Small one, good luck on your quest. If thou does not make it. We will honour your memory. "

And all light faded as the doors slammed shut. Your body began to subtly ache. It left you to go over the moments that had lead up to this as you tried to figure out, through tears, where did it all go wrong?

#yandere madness combat #madness combat #yandere madness combat x reader #madness combat x reader #tower guards #blackguard #blueguard #redguard #yellowguard #cw yandere #cw gore #cw murder #cw injury #cw violence #cw blade violence #cw intimidation #cw possible reader death

[chibitabathasloves]

i think when it comes to learning a language it's better to learn smth fun than smth u "should" i never was able to get into spanish. and theres no real reason for me to learn lithuanian but its fun ! gl w danish !!

if you do end up reading the books i'll have to warn you of p much every trigger warning on earth ? thomas harris managed to trigger me on things i didn't even know could be a problem. so be safe out there. i haven't watched SOTL in a way that matters so i can't say anything about it (i know) or hannibal rising for that matter (havent even read the book version of that) but manhunter is also another hannibal i love ! he's in it for 8 minutes though. up to you if thats worth it. feed the book notes ! :) also i wouldnt be able to judge u for ur handwriting ! i have severe dysgraphia so i understand how it is sometimes. i can't promise id be able to read it though. (also unrelated and a bit late but if you want to share the italian will/hanna nicknames i think i'd love that knowledge)

my favorite part about NBC lecter is definitely his self control. his need for control actually. and to me the most important part about lecter is his survivability. that's why to me its always funny to think "oh old man needs his fancy silk and fine dinners, he'd crumble like feta if he didn't have them" but if this turns into serious analysis of his character then its glossing over the fact that hannibal lecter has reached almost perfect ataraxia ? like, he has perfect control at all times. he has control over the situation (his constant manipulation and schemes) but if the situation slips from him (getting tied up christ style and slashed at the wrists, getting kidnapped and tied up in the stables), then it doesn't matter, he still has control. because... he doesn't care ! hannibal doesn't lose his shit pulling his hair out crying screaming if his plans don't go according to plan because he's reached perfect control over his emotions. therefore he doesn't care if things go wrong, it's just another interesting thing happening in his life. if he doesn't allow himself to feel upset, if he doesn't allow himself to freak out over the loss of control, then he's never lost control in the first place, he can't get traumatized, and it's like nothing bad happened. that's why i think any upset he might have felt over the assassination attempt was played up/acted out so he could lure alana (who is attracted to pathetic men in need of fixing like a moth to the light). thats also why i think hannibal couldn't have suffered THAT much from being in jail for three years because... idk like sure it cost him something, it cost him his freedom and everything. freedom from murder. but the fact he gave it up willingly is so much more important to who hannibal lecter is - someone who will never be in a traumatic situation ever again and never get hurt again - than any luxury he might have had when he was free and has now lost. i think in comparison the s2 finale was more of a loss of control albeit partial and i think it affected him more negatively. what are ur thoughts

Okay, so I actually have my notes out, because I am an absolute little gremlin. And you're right about the sense of control over his emotions. When he had a noose around his neck he was still cracking jokes. And you're also right about playing up the trauma. If you watch him with Jack, he has his regular collar, buttoned all the way up with a tie. With Alana he wears the shirts open with a scarf to cover up the bruises that may or may not still be there. He acts like the idea of having something constricting around his neck is unappealing, but still steps into his tailored suits and ties a scarf around his neck anyways. Its a very shallow and easily seen through disguise (bruises from a noose would be much high up his neck).

When he was in the straight jacket at the pig pen he only had eyes for Will. Understanding that despite the fact that Will could easily dispose of him, it is still not the reckoning he was promised. So its only a matter of time until that happens. Its part of the reason I think he ledt Will unconscious while abducting Mason. A lot of season 2 is about the pull between Will and Hannibal I think.

The culmination of that tug of war leads to the first time that Hannibal is let down. It was a loss of control over his emotions, after all, one cannot help with who they fall in love with. He thought that Will would join his side, or kill him. Instead he had to deal with Jack Crawford in his kitchen. Hannibal smelled the betrayal on Will’s skin and gave him a choice. But what Hannibal couldn't see was Will trying to sort out his affairs, asking Freddie to not write about Abigail, to only write about him. I think Will was getting ready to leave with him, but unfortunately due to Jack it was taken from him in the form of a knife wound. Gutting him in the literal sense compared to the emotional gutting Hannibal received.

I think the second time he is let down is around the time that Will decides that he doesn't want to know where Hannibal is. Will went to forgive Hannibal, to see if he could love him, even if he wasn't aware of the love he carried just yet. And he was met with a bone saw and the promise of having his brain eaten. Will had enough, but Hannibal thought they could move on from it. I think that Hannibal knew that despite the fact that Will said he was cutting ties, that he didn't mean it. It's really hard to tell, but Will isn't making eye contact. And I think that's really telling.

I think that part of the reason that Hannibal gives himself up in front of Will is to show that he doesn't need all the trappings, just Will's regard. Its a cheap shot, but it clearly works. He seems to grow into his ability to roll with how his love for Will makes him feel. Reveling in the unpredictable nature of it and the man who causes it. I do believe Hannibal when he said he has found Will in his mind palace, victorious. Even if its just a shade of the man he desires. Which is why I agree that the S2 finale was much more rife with trauma for them both.

I am going to stop rambling now before this turns into a dissertation oh my god

#hannibal #sansnom #i fucking rambled oh my jesus

[a-yarn-of-purple-prose]

This is supposed to be my rounding up post for @justleaveacommentfest but I'm cheating because I'm making it into...

Chasm Delving Highlight Reel: Special Just Leave a Comment Edition

At this point I should be real and say that I almost always leave comments. It's just a matter of having the energy but, as any of the authors I follow could tell you, I'm actually your weirdly joyful recurring commenter. I'll leave you sincere emoji hearts and "Thank you for writing!" and several "I love this so muuuuch!" or comments about how you made me cry (it's true, y'all make me cry and laugh and yelp.)

No regrets at all, though the comment bot stuff had me rethink my approach to sound a little more like I was actually reading.

I say this so you'll understand that while I didn't rack up numbers on the comment fest, that was because I've commented on most of the fics that are in my bookmarks. I needed new stuff and there was not enough time on the week to read everything I wanted.

General numbers are: 12 comments on 10 fics (one was updating daily and yes I did the thing.)

But I read a bit and found some good stuff! Which led me to the thought "why not make those into recs as well?" After all, it's been a while.

Since I know how wordy I get, I'll put the rest behind the cut. Click for some sweet sweet Genshin Impact recs!

On the 10th the prompt was old fics and new fics.

Despite the site issues, I actually managed to leave a comment on a new fic!

If They Could Talk Reasonably, They Would've By Now, by FollowerofMercy

Rated: Teen and Up

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Diluc, Kaeya, and Lumine (to save the day) with a cameo by Venti

Ships: gen fic

General vibe: it's a reconciliation fic, but starts with a fist-fight

Trigger warning: none so far

Yeah, yeah, I know most of you prefer reconciliation fics to be about the guys being forced to work together with maybe a side of hurt/comfort, but this fic feels real in a way that'll appeal to anyone with siblings.

The dialogue is fire and Lumine is a marvelous goblin. Also Venti does a sneaky thing, which is something I always approve.

For the 11th the theme was Old, New and under 2k.

Let's start with the new ones (I literally opened the tag and browsed for something that caught my eye.)

the treehouse by rheadaholyc

Rated: General audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Kaeya & Diluc & Klee with cameos by Albedo and Kaveh

Ships: gen fic

General vibe: the softest fluff

Trigger warning: none

Kaeya promises a treehouse to Klee. Guess where? The result is the cutest little piece of fluff.

This fic was under 2k when it was posted originally, but we sorta egged the author on and now it's a 3 chapter (no regrets at all, I love all of it.) You should read it if you need to soothe your soul.

Work in Progress by echoelbo.

Rated: General audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Alhaitham, Cyno and assorted Sumeru characters

Ship: Alhaitham/Cyno

General vibe: crack taken seriously

Trigger warning: none

Alhaitham/Cyno fake dating fic, mostly played for comedy (or is it?) Since it's very short I won't spoil you by saying anything else about it. Short and funny is a perfect combo, isn't it?

For old I cheated :)

A new chapter of Paper, Glass, Steel, and Bone [or, The Tensile Strength of Tenacity] by kawree dropped on the 12th and of course I had to read it and comment.

I keep telling everyone to read this fic with mixed results (the rarepair experience after all), but if you want a big cup of Kaeya to go with his cameo in the current event, this fic is what you're looking for.

There's so much lovely banter! The first chapter is a charmer, but I really love that "dinner with the old timers" scene later on (also the hair-brushing one, but all kinds of qpr things make me go weak on the knees) (the thing about the dinner scene is that it's got good dialogue, emotional cues and *throws glitter* drama) and the dialogue in this latest chapter. Ugh, feelings.

The 12th was for AUs so I get to rec the infuriating smart people AU Chiluc fic! Yay!

Edit: I found out the author would rather I don't rec them, so I'm removing this link because I'm too much of a sinner for them.

I also managed to read one of those fics that had been lingering on my Read Later.

It’s like Alice in Wonderland but after falling through a rabbit hole instead of anthropomorphic creatures, card soldiers, and hookah-smoking caterpillars, you get gay smut by Grymmeoir

Rated: Mature (there is sex at the very end of it) (just saying because the rest of the fic is pretty much teen)

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Childe, Zhongli, Aether, Lumine, cameos by everyone you can imagine

Ships: Childe/Zhongli unless you're the sort that would say this is most certainly Zhongli/Childe ^^

General vibe: absolute crack

Trigger warning: none, unless you react really badly to second-hand embarrassment because Oh Boy

This is an Actor AU Childe/Zhongli thing that is kinda of a fusion with a webnovel that I haven't actually read. It's very funny and was a great thing to read while a cyclone raged outside (we get Weather over here in the bog) (I swear everything's fine.)

When I say this is crack you have to believe me. This fic is about a man that is so fucking oblivious he thinks shipping himself with someone else has nothing to do with real feelings. And let's not talk about Zhongli. 100% proof crack. Fun to read though.

The 13th was for rarepairs, which is a conceptual issue for me in this fandom.

There are two kinds of ships in Genshin: the ones with a whole bunch of fics of all kinds and the ones with 20 smut fics to their name. I'm not very much into smut :/ So I'd like you all to pretend Chiscara is a rarepair. Okay? Okay.

missing missive by childenator3000

Rated: Teen and up

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Childe, Wanderer (I won't call babygirl Scaramouche regardless of the status of his AO3 tag), Zhongli, Xiao

Ships: Childe/Wanderer, blink and you'll miss it Xiao/Zhongli

General vibe: sweet angsty fluff. What, it makes sense if you think about the feeling.

Trigger warning: none

A sweet little fic about finding out someone was in love with you hundreds of years ago (and might still be?) and/or seeing your love letter in a museum. Very much canon noncompliant as every single shippy fic is, yes, but also because of making stuff up about post-canon. Perfectly nice stuff, though. And, also, very importantly, about IMMORTALS IN LOVE. Big bold letters because that's my absolute favorite romance trope (yes, I'm the audience for all those xianxia dramas about reincarnation and eternal pining.)

The 14th was for trying something new...

... but I'll be real here and say that this was the day that I found this trove of short Kaeluc recs, which is the very opposite of something new.

just say yes by parahelios

Rated: Teen and up

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Diluc, Kaeya, Lisa

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

General vibe: sweet, very sweet

Trigger warning: maybe alcohol, but it's not very present.

Short marriage proposal fic with a little miscommunication. Extremely cute.

Three years apart by Pas_Cal

Rated: General audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Diluc, Kaeya

Ships: Diluc/Kaeya

General vibe: yummy angst

Trigger warning: none

Diluc/Kaeya angsty reconciliation but make it a messy kabedon thing.

Then I felt bad for doing the opposite of the prompt and decided to read a rarepair from one of the characters I don't usually ship, in this case the Wanderer.

(please ignore the fact that this list has another Wanderer ship fic. I generally headcanon babygirl as aroace for obvious reasons.)

Best choice I could have made, since I found a fic that made me stay awake past bedtime (best kind of fic).

appleseed by moonbell (snowdrops)

Rated: Teen and up

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Kaveh, Wanderer, cameos by Alhaitham, Cyno, Tighnari and Nahida

Ships: Kaveh/Wanderer

General vibe: fragile build up of trust, beautifully rendered

Trigger warning: none

This fic is tagged as relationship study, but it's more like a character study of both of them, together and alone. The author here does this spectacular thing, managing to write an one-shot that reads like 50 chapters of slow burn.

The relationship develops in this slow, gentle way and the prose is absolutely beautiful. Seriously, this story is constructed like well-made lace in cobweb weight yarn.

(Additionally, if you are into reading people's thoughts about their writing, the author has a whole site with a bunch of commentary linked at the end notes. A real treat if you are also the sort of person that would be suffering in Haravatat.)

That's it for today! I swear I'll get around making a true Chasm Delving Highlight Reel some other day, the recs are piling up here.

And, if you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, here's the link to my other Genshin Impact recs. Enjoy!

#genshin impact #fanfic recs #just leave a comment fest #Diluc #Kaeya #Lumine #Kaveh #Alhaitham #Cyno #Wanderer #Tartaglia #Zhongli #Chasm Delver Highlight Reel

[sinner-as-saint]

we can’t stop, we’re enemies.

Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader AU

Run-through: After the events of the last battle against Thanos, you teamed up with Sam and Bucky to carry on your superhero duties. You got along with Sam just fine, he was a really good friend to you. Bucky however, was not. From constant banters, to unnecessary hand-to-hand combat, to purposely getting each other in trouble during risky missions, to being the main cause of Sam’s migraines; it was safe to say that you and Bucky considered yourselves to be each other’s nemesis. Although that soon changes when, courtesy of your silly banters, a certain mission goes slightly wrong - one which involves strong chemicals which, unbeknownst to you, were designed to mess with the brain and hormones, thus encouraging the need to breed and procreate amongst all those who inhale it...

Themes: enemies-to-lovers, smut, sex pollen trope, dirty talk, swear words, fluff

“How is it going up there Sam, talk to me.” 

You spoke, waiting to hear from Sam through the ear piece. 

The three of you were on a mission on unfamiliar lands. Rumor had it that some shady organization was conducting illegal experiments. The whole location was spooky, and you needed to be thorough and quick. So Sam decided to get an aerial view along with Red Wing, and see if there are any threats coming your way while you and Bucky decided to check out the underground laboratories. 

The whole place was shadowy and old, it almost seemed like no one had been here in a long time. But still, these people were criminals so you had to gather every evidence you could which would lead you their way. 

And so far, after exploring the place for the past half an hour, you found nothing major. Just weird laboratory glassware filled with liquids and what not. 

“Sam?” you called out again into the ear piece, keeping your gun at the ready. “Say something damn it.” 

His reply came. “There’s something sketchy about the building at the back, I’m gonna go check it out. But you have to promise me you won’t kill each other by the time I get back.” 

You and Bucky sent death glares at each other in disgust. He was on the other side of the lab, flipping through files and papers, while you were searching the cabinets and drawers. The two of you were separated by a steel workstation. Dark leather jacket, metal arm exposed; you’d find him handsome if he wasn’t so annoying. 

“Sure, whatever.” Bucky mumbled, being his grumpy self. 

You frowned at him, “Dude, drop your fucking attitude.” 

Bucky rolled his eyes at you, “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Sam roared through the ear piece, “Enough! Focus, you two are in the labs and we don’t know what’s in there. Just, maybe look out for each other. Okay? I’m going in.”

“Be careful, Sam.” You spoke, sending another dirty look at Bucky. 

“Yeah y-,” 

Sam got cut off. All you could hear was some static noises and then complete silence. 

“Sam? Can you hear us?” Bucky tried reaching out but neither of you could hear him. “This isn’t good.” 

“Damn it!” You cursed. “Maybe he flew out of range. Or maybe we’re too deep under.” 

For once in his life he nodded, agreeing with you. “Let’s just hurry up and see what we can find. We need to get out of here as fast as we can and get to the Jet.” He said, flipping through more and more files and papers, his metal arm glistening in the poorly lit room. 

You sassed in the same tone he used before, “Don’t tell me what to do.” And you earned yourself another glare from him. 

Fifteen minutes later and you two still had nothing to work with. 

“This is useless. There’s nothing here, this is just bullshit.” Bucky complained, slamming down a file on the workstation so hard that it made you jump. 

You were annoyed. You slammed a cabinet shut and turned to face him. “Oh I’m sorry princess, is work getting too tiring? Do you need a break? Hmm?” 

“Shut up, you’re the one who keeps whining all the time.” He wasn’t wrong. 

You stepped forward, grabbing the edge of the cold workstation. “Well maybe if you’d quit complaining and actually do your part of the job, then I wouldn’t have to whine about always doing everything on my own and you taking credit for it in front of Sam.” 

He leaned forward, his metal arm already denting his side of the edge of the workstation. “Maybe if you’d stop bitching about everything and everyone all the time then maybe we’d get along and actually get shit done.” 

You leaned in too. “Or maybe if just me and Sam teamed up, we’d work better. I still don’t know why he keeps you around. Take your metal arm away, what are you? Exactly, just a hundred year old, confused man.” 

He smirked. “And what are you? Just a spoilt, whiny brat who knows how to use a gun?” He knew just what to say to get the reaction he wanted out of you. 

In less than a few seconds you had your loaded gun out in front of you, aiming it at his forehead. “And guess what, she never misses a target.” You spat at him. 

You had done this before; aiming guns at each other until Sam comes to break the tension. But Sam wasn’t here this time. 

Bucky knew you would never pull the trigger on him so he gave you a handsome, arrogant smirk which only pissed you off even more. “Come on, shoot.” He provoked you. 

“Stop pissing me off.” You warned. 

“Or what? You’re gonna shoot me for calling you a whiny, spoilt brat? See, that’s exactly what brats do.” 

“James, stop.” Oh he was getting on your nerves. You were agitated. 

He just smirked and went on. “I actually believe that that might be your superpower, destroying people by annoying them to death with how much of a brat you can actually be.” 

You glared at him, unmoving, furious. You placed your forefinger on the trigger. “Say brat one more time and I will blow your fucking head off and when Sam asks, I’ll make it seem like an accident.” 

He leaned closer, aligning his forehead to the barrel of your gun. He stared at you with his stormy, ocean blue eyes; inciting you to just pull the damn trigger. He watched you with mischief in his eyes. “Brat.” He mouthed, smirking right after and waiting for your reaction. 

You clenched your jaw and shifted your aim just a little so that the bullet misses him but still shoots right by his ear. You pulled the trigger without hesitation, shooting at the shelf filled with dark red and brown liquids behind Bucky. 

Bucky maintained his calm and composure despite the loud sound of the shattering glass falling on the tiles right behind him. “Brat.” He said again, out loud this time. 

“I hate you.” You lowered your gun but then noticed something behind Bucky. Smoke, or some sort of vapor oozing out of the broken flasks and test tubes. You froze for a second. “Bucky, look.” You walked around the workstation and joined him on the other side. 

The vapor quickly filled the room like thick fog, reducing visibility and making your throat burn a little. You coughed; once, twice. You looked beside you and Bucky was standing there with a look of horror on his face. 

The moment his supersoldier sense got a whiff of the vapor, something in him ignited. No… 

“We have to get out of here. Now.” You heard his voice, then felt his cold fingers wrap around your wrists as he tugged you along, making his way out of the lab. He tried to hold his breath but he couldn’t hold it very long. He tried to find the door to exit the room but that was hard too because neither of you could see properly. 

“This stuff,” you spoke in between coughs, “will probably kill us, won’t it?” You held on tightly to his arm. “You need to get us out of here now.” The vapor was reducing your visibility more and more. 

He felt the side of the wall, looking for the metal handle of the door through which you entered the lab. “It won’t kill us.” He growled as he looked beside him. You were standing close to him, so close, holding on to his arm tightly, a thin layer of sweat covered your face. 

It was almost funny how you had your gun aimed at him just a minute ago and now you were relying on him for protection. 

“How can you be so sure? Do you know what this stuff is?” You asked. 

He sighed. He knew. “I have a hunch, but let’s hope I’m wrong.” He felt warm. Deep inside something stirred in him. Animalistic, primal, feral. It was there, pressing and burning. Guess he wasn’t wrong. 

He finally found the door and he pushed it open, letting the two of you out and you took off running at once. You tried to reach Sam. A couple tries later, he finally responded. “I got some names, I think we got what we’re looking for. Where are you guys?” 

“We found…. uh, nothing. We’re on our way to the jet, meet us there.” Bucky responded, running beside you. 

You were confused out of your mind, not to mention you felt feverish. Hot, and you were sweating more than usual in places you’d rather not think about. Something in you was yearning to break free. You felt chained, you needed release. You felt like something had awakened inside of you; a deep hunger. Aroused, you felt aroused. Or was it just the adrenaline rush? 

By the time you tried to figure out what was actually going on with you, you both had made it to the Jet. 

“I feel sick.” you mumbled, stumbling on your way inside the jet. “I think… I think that smoke poisoned me.” You placed your palm against the side of the plane to hold on so you don’t fall. You felt like gravity wasn’t pulling you down anymore. You were a little out of breath. 

Then you felt a cold hand on your shoulder. You grimaced as it only ignited the fire which you just found out had been burning inside you since you left the lab. 

“You’re not poisoned. You’re not sick, you’re gonna be okay. We just have to… we have to get home.” Bucky was worse than you were. His enhanced senses allowed him to feel everything you felt, times ten perhaps. 

His heart raced as he got a whiff of your fading perfume, mixed with the adrenaline pumping through your veins and your natural, raw scent. He could feel your arousal from here, and it pulled him in so easily. All he wanted to do was to tear your suit off, pin you up against the side of the Jet and fuck the living hell out of you, stretch you out and just rail you until you could no longer take it. 

Fuck. 

You looked up at him; heart racing, palms sweating and even your mouth was salivating more than usual. “You know what that thing was, don’t you?” You asked, ignoring the way his cold hand upon your shoulder made you want to lean into his touch even more. “What was it?” 

You saw the look in his hooded eyes. Bucky sighed, pulling his hand away from you and the loss of contact made you whimper ever so quietly. You felt warmer and more and more breathless with each second that passed by. 

“They used to make those substances, long ago back when I was with HYDRA. I didn’t expect to find those here. They were used to… to try and see if they could get super soldiers to procreate naturally.” Bucky explained and waited for your reaction. 

“Sex pollen. Correct?” 

He nodded, “Yes.” 

You were a little shaken, but relieved knowing that at least it wasn’t poison and you wouldn’t be dying a painful death. “That’s… I mean, it could have been poison.” You didn’t know how to react after you pieced it all together. “How long before it wears off?” 

“Twenty-four hours unless...” 

“Unless what?” 

“Unless you fuck it out of your system well enough.”

That had you surprised. “Oh. Well that’s just great, isn’t it? Fucking perfect. I’m screwed.” 

Bucky tried his hardest to refrain himself from leaning in and biting that sassy mouth of yours, shoving his tongue past your lips to shut you up, to hear you moan and gasp and cry out his name as he takes you however he wants to… 

“We.” He corrected you. “It’ll get worse every hour.” He replied. 

You sighed and moved away from him, unzipping your combat suit partly and removing the jacket because you couldn’t handle the heat. Bucky cursed as you stripped into just a tank top and tight pants, right in front of him. He felt his cock get harder. 

“Can you not?” He sounded pissed off again; frustrated. “This is all your doing. The least you can do is make this a little bit easier for both of us.” 

His words made you turn around and glare at him. “How is this my doing? I didn’t even know what was in that lab.” 

He stepped forward, instinctively. The sight of your exposed neck and your soft skin was making him think of unspeakable things that he wanted to do to you. As he advanced, you tried not to look down at his cock, straining against his zipper. Your heart raced as you took in the size of his bulge. Enhanced super soldier indeed. 

“Had you not been a spoiled brat who can’t take a joke, you wouldn’t have tried to shoot at me nor would you have shot those flasks!” He argued, feeling more and more warm as he got closer to you. 

You took a step forward as well, fueled by annoyance, lust and anger. “Who was it who provoked me into doing that because they couldn’t keep their fucking mouth shut, huh? That’s right, your annoying ass!” 

Bucky pushed you against the side of the Jet without a second thought. He grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head with his hand while pressing his body into you, his metal arm circling around your waist and pressing you further into him. 

He hadn’t thought this through. He hadn’t thought about how your warm breath would feel against his skin, or how warm your body would be under his touch. You felt feverish, having him this close. His tall, large frame and his tight grip made your whimper under him. Your body reacted to him naturally. 

All you felt was warm, his body heat, his scent. The feeling of his cold leather jacket against your flushed skin. You wanted him. Or rather, your body did. 

“Don’t you provoke me now, you fucking whiny brat.” He whispered, menacingly into your ear. 

You tried to ignore the shivers his voice sent down your entire body. But he saw it. And you could feel his erection press against your crotch. Just to mess with him, you discreetly moved your hips against his, making him hiss loudly. 

“What are you gonna do about it, dipshit?” You sassed, knowing that given his intensified senses he must be feeling much worse than you. 

He groaned as you kept grinding against him, your pulsating core rubbing against the bulge in his pants. And that only made it worse for both of you. 

“Fuck…” Bucky swore, before quickly pulling away from you, but not releasing you yet. “You’re such a bitch.” His body was screaming for you, each nerve ending of his was on fire. A fire only you could douse. 

You were just the same, on the edge and wanting to reach out for him; knowing he would satiate your hunger better than anyone could. Your body was throbbing as you stared into his eyes, your gaze lowering down to his dog tags. How you wanted those dangling right above your face… 

You heard someone clear their throat. It wasn’t Bucky. 

“Something you two need to tell me? Or is this just your new way of trying to kill each other?” A deep voice asked from behind Bucky. 

“Sam! Are you okay?” You escaped Bucky’s grip and rushed to Sam. 

He seemed alright to you. He nodded. “Yeah, we just need to get home. I need to notify the team and see what we should do next. What was in those labs?” 

You glared at Bucky. His smug face alone was pissing you off, but God right now you wanted to ride that man until the sun came tomorrow morning. 

“Just a bunch of useless experiments. Nothing major.” He glared at you as he said the last bit to Sam. 

The ride back home was one of the most painful, annoying and frustrating situations you had ever undergone. Each time you felt like someone was watching you, you’d turn your head to the side and find Bucky staring; and his stares would make your body tremble in need. 

Meanwhile he was having a hard time too, in more ways than one. He could feel his blood rush south even at the brief sound of your voice whenever you sighed in annoyance or talked to Sam. Luckily the latter could not pick up on the thick, sexual tension. 

Once at the compound, you each hurried to your own rooms and that’s where you stayed until the evening. Sam found it weird that you both skipped dinner but he didn’t need another headache today so he went to bed, telling himself that he’d deal with you two tomorrow morning. 

Bucky was a mess. Even after an hour under the cold shower his body was still calling out for you. He tried taking care of his business on his own, but that wasn’t working. He was still so hard it was painful. Nothing could make this better, nothing could soothe the pain - nothing but you. He needed you so badly it was driving him insane, like he was an animal in heat being asked to suppress his feral desires towards his mate. Being away from you was painful. He couldn’t help but hate you for no reason at all usually, but he’d do what it takes to be inside you and make you scream his name right now. 

You were equally as troubled at the super soldier. You tried taking a warm bath and tried to think of other things you could focus on, but nothing worked. Your toys didn’t seem appealing tonight, you needed him, all of him. You shivered at the thought of his taut, virile body under yours, or above. His masculine scent, the sound of his moans, would he bite?… fuck. You could feel your arousal leak out of you every now and then, it was insane how aroused you were. You couldn’t look at him for long without getting unnecessarily annoyed, but you would do anything just to have him rearrange your guts right now. 

What made it worse was that neither of you could stand each other at all. Enemies, you called yourselves. But right now you couldn’t help but crave each other in the most salacious way possible. 

Fuck this. You couldn’t take this anymore. You decided to swallow your pride and make your way to his room and ask him if you two could come to an agreement on how to fight this thing because it would be impossible to go another twenty hours feeling like this. You were burning from the inside. This was unbearable. 

Just as you opened your bedroom door, you were slightly surprised to find Bucky standing right outside your door. His metal hand up midair, as though he was to knock on your door and you happened to open the door just in time. You almost drooled at the sight of him; sweatpants and a tight, white t-shirt. You swallowed and cleared your throat. 

“Hey.” You greeted him, not knowing how to deal with this situation. You felt so drawn to him in that moment, so damn restless and needy that it was hard to breathe right while looking at him. 

“I was, uh, about to knock…” He didn’t know how he got here, he didn’t remember. Maybe it was the chemicals messing with his brain and turning him into a hungry beast. He didn’t care that he was knocking on your door in the middle of the night, he wanted you. He was craving you and that’s all he knew. Also the oversized t-shirt, the only you were wearing at the time, was not helping at all. 

“Yeah, um…” you rambled then stopped talking the moment you found him staring into your eyes with a wild look in his eyes. 

That was it. 

You grabbed him by the waistband of his sweats and pulled him inside, shutting the door behind him. Before Bucky could process anything, you had him pushed against your closed door and your mouth was on his, kissing him hungrily. Your hands slowly slipped under his tight t-shirt and you lazily trailed your hands up and down his toned abs. 

His hands gripped your hips on either side as he kissed you back with just as much ardor as you did. His body ignited the moment he felt your lips and hands on him, yet the heat was weirdly satisfying; it stimulated him but calmed him down at the same time. It felt perfect. This was just what he needed, you. 

Your movements were rapid and passionate, fiery. Hands roaming each other's body, touching and feeling and exploring; making each other moan like you were both touch-starved. 

You let out a soft moan when you felt his tongue slip past your lips, stroking the top of your mouth while his metal hand slipped under your shirt. Your body was tingling wherever he touched you. His touch made you feel way better than you had felt in the past few hours and you were grateful. Your moans sent his mind straight to the gutter and he couldn’t wait to be inside you. 

“I need you…” you whispered against his lips as you pulled away to catch your breath. “I need you to fuck me… right here, right now.” Your demands made him smirk as he looked down at you with lust in his eyes. 

“Oh?” he managed to still find the energy to be an ass to you. “Why don’t you go on and beg for it, then?” 

You scoffed, leaning in to lick his lips while you hand dipped into his pants. You grabbed his erected cock and gave it a little, gentle squeeze. He moaned like he hadn’t been touched in forever. Like he was desperate for one thing and one thing only; you. You whispered, “You need me too, Bucky. I’m not gonna beg you, I’m doing you a favor here.” You slid your closed fist up and down his length and made him moan some more before you let go and watched him groan and clench his jaw in annoyance. 

He looked down at you, panting in need just as you were. His hand slid into your hair and he gripped it, tugging on it just enough to make you gasp in pleasure and pain. “Still a fucking brat with that annoying attitude I see?” He leaned in to bite your exposed neck, making your cry out in pain before he licked the spot, soothing it. “Don’t worry doll, I’ll fuck all that attitude out of you.” 

He let go of your hair but tightened his grip around your waist as he placed his mouth back on yours. Kissing you like there’s no tomorrow; biting your lip and bruising your already swollen mouth. He was wild, and you needed it and more. 

He pushed you down on your bed, and stood back to watch you for a moment. How did he never realize that you were so naturally beautiful? He looked down at you like a predator looking at his meal; fiercely, ready to ruin you and make you scream and beg and satiate his hunger. As well as yours. 

“Well, if you’re done staring…” you knelt on your bed and reached out for him, grabbing him by the neck and pulling him closer. “I want you in me. Now.” Your demanding tone riled him up. 

Bucky grabbed you by the hair and tilted your head back again. “If you wanna get fucked, you’re gonna ask nicely. Understood?” 

You glared at him, shooting death glares right at him while your hand palmed him through his sweatpants. “I fucking hate you.” You spat at him, whimpering as he pushed you back down on the bed, quickly climbing on top of you this time. 

“I hate you too.” He knelt on your bed, straddling your waist as he tore your oversized shirt in half and off your body, throwing the pieces of fabric somewhere on your bedroom floor. You laid beneath him in just your underwear and he growled. 

“That was my favorite shirt, you fucking idiot.” You whispered, breathless, shivers dancing down your spine as he traced your mouth with his two fingers, slipping them past your lips once, then twice then trailing his now wet fingers down your neck, till your belly button. 

“You think I care?” he leaned down and took one of your breasts into his mouth, kneading the other with his metal hand. The contrast of his warm mouth around one and his cold hand around the other was driving you crazy. He bit, and tugged and licked; making your back arch off the bed as you purred in pleasure. 

Your hips moved on their own, grinding against his erection again to try and alleviate the pain. You were desperate. Bucky pinched and rolled one of your nipples while he lightly grazed the other with his teeth, and you let out a loud moan. 

“Please… please, I need you. Please…” You muttered under your breath, knowing he could hear you. Bucky smirked as he pulled away from your chest, ignoring the way his cock throbbed. “What’s so fucking funny?” You grabbed him by the throat, pulling his face closer to yours. 

His metal arm reached down in between your legs and he ripped your underwear off. The fabric hurt just a little when it tore against your skin. “Just that it's the first time I heard you asking for something so politely. It’s not so hard after all, is it?” 

Now he was pissing you off. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and flipped the two of you around. You got on top of him and straddled his waist, trapping him under you like he had you before. You had better control like this. 

You grabbed him by the jaw and leaned in to kiss his lips, fiercely. “Stop fucking playing, Barnes.” You whispered against his lips, grinding against his hard cock again. He closed his eyes and hissed in pleasure as you kissed down to his neck, nibbling on his skin along his throat. 

He moaned, hands gripping your hips and guiding you as you rubbed your bare core against his clothed erection. “No? I thought brats liked games?” He mumbled. 

You pulled away from his neck and looked down at his smug face. “You are so fucking annoying.” You reached down in between your bodies and lowered his sweatpants all the way down until he kicked them off. You grabbed his cock and stroked him gently, agonizingly slow. He moaned shamelessly, and eventually caught on that you were just teasing him even more. 

“Don’t tease me…” he sounded just as breathless as you were. 

“Why? Not so fond of games anymore?” you sassed, rubbing your throbbing core against his thigh while you stroked him so gently that he felt like he was losing his mind. 

He growled as he grabbed you by the waist and flipped the two of you around, him being on top again. “Enough,” he growled in your ear, “Spread those legs for me.” He ordered, settling in between them as you spread your legs to accommodate him. He grabbed your thighs and parted your legs even more as he aligned the tip of his cock to your opening. “Now stay still, don’t move.” 

You braced yourself for him, but nothing could have prepared you for that. His length stretched you open until he was seated deep inside you, filling you up entirely to a point where you couldn’t even think of anything else other than him being balls deep inside you. 

You moaned as he removed himself entirely and pushed himself back into you, and watched in awe how you struggled to adjust to his size. He lowered his face again, and leaned into your ear, “Fuck….” you heard him moan; panting and swearing under his breath as he rocked into you. 

You were a moaning mess under him in no time. He kissed your open mouth while he rammed into you over and over again, making your eyes tear up. The burning need subsided a little bit as his cock brushed against all the right spots inside you. “Buck… faster, please,” You whimpered. 

He chuckled into your ear, “Needy little brat…” he mumbled as he sped up into you, making you lose your ability to focus on anything else other than him and his body. He pulled away from your face to look down at you, his metal hand coming up to wrap itself around your throat. “This is what you wanted since we left that lab, huh? For me to fuck your greedy little cunt? Hmm?” He taunted as he stretched you out completely. You lifted your legs up and wrapped them around his waist; allowing him to thrust deeper into you. 

You felt tears escaping your eyes as he pulled you closer and pressed his forehead to yours fucking deeper into you. He was relentless; each moan which left your lips only encouraged him to get more and more rough. 

You felt a pressure form in between your hips, your body begging for release. “Bucky… please.” You moaned, begging. For something, anything. You’d take anything at this point. But right when your walls started clenching around him and when you were just about to come undone; he pulled out. 

“Please what?” He surprised himself with how he was able to tease you in this situation when all he wanted was to make both of you cum over and over again. 

“I need to cum, Bucky please,” you cried, with tears in your eyes. 

Bucky leaned in to kiss your swollen lips, not minding the tears. “Do you deserve it?” He asked, and you nodded immediately, your body shaking with how bad you needed to cum. “Oh you do, do you?” 

You nodded again. “Please…please...” 

“Well since you asked nicely…” Bucky flipped you onto your stomach and pulled you onto your knees by your hips and pushed himself inside you again. You felt his muscular body press against the curve of your ass as he filled you up again. 

He rocked into you from behind. His hand found its way to your front and he pressed the palm against your lower abdomen. He liked how he could feel himself deep inside you with each thrust. And he liked how that drove you insane, he could by the way your walls gripped his cock. 

“Feel that, little brat? That’s all you’re good for… to take my cock like a good little slut.” He whispered. 

You groaned at the sound of his raspy voice, his words making you milk him even harder. “You wish, you dipshit.” You moaned as he sped up when you least expected it. You whimpered, and he chuckled now that he had you at his mercy. 

His hand travelled all the way to your throat and he choked you gently as he bent down to whisper in your ear, “I can assure you that no one is ever gonna fuck you this good,” he boasted as he very gently squeezed the side of your throat. But hard enough to make you lose your mind.

You could only moan and whimper in response while he kept pounding into you incessantly. “Fuck… please....” you cried. 

You felt the pressure in between your hips grow until you couldn’t hold back anymore. You felt him quicken his pace as he chased his own orgasm. “Cum for me. Now.” 

You didn’t have to be told twice. You came undone, hard and fast; moaning his name as you did. Bucky came right after you. 

You collapsed onto your bed, sprawled unevenly and not even caring. Your eyes were shut in fatigue, your heart racing and you could feel Bucky’s body heat right next to you. He was catching his breath too, mumbling something under his breath which you couldn’t catch. 

For the first time in hours, you felt at ease. Your body wasn’t yearning anymore, but the hunger was still there. So when Bucky got up to leave, you grabbed him by the hand and pulled him back into bed with you. 

He smirked as he fell helplessly onto your bed again, right next to you. “You want more, you greedy little brat?” 

You punched his arm before getting up and getting on top of him again, sliding your body down his cock. He hissed as you did. 

“Just another round.” You whispered, loving the sight of him under you. His tan skin against your white sheets, him moaning as you slowly lifted up and sank back down on his cock. Oh fuck… 

You placed your hands on his muscular chest to hold yourself up as you sped up, riding him like you’ve been dreaming of this whole time. His hands gripped your hips, guiding you up and down his cock until you both found a pleasurable pace. 

You weren’t going to last too long, but you just needed to have him buried deep inside you again. His thick, girthy cock stretched you open as you took him as best you could, moaning and whimpering desperately as he groaned and gasped under you. 

Your walls gripping him and milking him like they had earlier, not even a few minutes ago. You felt the pressure forming nicely in between your hips again. You let out a loud moan as you felt his cock reach places it hadn’t before, turning you into a mess. 

His grip on your hips tightened as he brought you down on his cock with force each time and thrusting upwards to fuck you deeper. “Cum for me.” He threw his head back, growling. “Cum for me again…” 

Your hand grabbed him by the jaw and you leaned in to press your lips against his, claiming his open mouth and muffling his animalistic growls as you came undone around him again. Your orgasm then triggered his. 

You fell limp on top of him right after and he instinctively cradled your head. “You okay?” 

You nodded, your sweaty bodies pressed against each other but neither of you minding it. “Yeah.” 

Bucky gently rolled to his side, letting you down on your side of the bed. You tried your best to calm your racing heart. Not to mention you felt much, much better than earlier. 

Bucky got up to leave again, and you grabbed his hand before he got completely out of your bed. He turned to face you with a smirk then groaned dramatically, “Woman please, I’m not a machine. The pain will subside now, I believe we’ve done pretty good at fucking it out of our systems. I can’t go all night, seriously.” 

You were in a haze so his words made you giggle. “You’re really leaving?” 

He looked down at you, sprawled on your bed. Your face was glowing, you looked ethereal. “You want me to stay?” He asked, wondering where the sassy brat in you went. 

You nodded. 

He smirked, getting back into bed next to you, “What, now you're obsessed with me?”

You rolled your eyes at him. “Shut up. I’m just saying since I might need you again in the morning, you might as well just sleep here.”  

He pretended to be hurt. “Wow.” He didn’t mind that at all. He got under the covers with you, “So… is it just the chemicals or are we…?” 

You snuggled closer to his side, he wrapped his arm around you, tucking your head under his chin. “Shh, I still hate you.” Your tired, soft voice reminded him of a sleepy kitten. 

He held you closer. “Of course.” He looked down at you and saw that you had already fallen asleep on his chest. He cracked a soft smile, whispering under his breath, “Brat.” 

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #sex pollen #tfatws #marvel

[jewishcharliebradbury]

long dean/cas fic recs

here is THEE masterpost of long-af fics i’ve been promising!

fics are organized by length from shortest to longest, starting at 50k words 

they’re a mix of au’s and canonverse (mostly canonverse since that’s what i typically prefer)

i’ve added ratings, official descriptions, and my own supplementary description/notes/notable trigger warnings if neccesary

asterisks are added to my fave fics

this list will probably be updated with additions in the future, i’ll mark any new ones by bolding the text (last updated: 10/09/21)

all rec posts

Long Fics (50k to 80k):

Though The Course May Change (explicit/51k)

After a couple who went missing several years ago from an Oregon couples retreat are mysteriously returned on the same night that another disappears, Dean and Charlie plan to go undercover to find the cause--until Dean's foot meets his mouth, and he finds himself fake-engaged to Castiel instead.

(accidental) fake dating case-fic set in an alternate s9. cute, funny, has interesting monster of the week.

Teaching Poetry to Fish (mature/52k)*

In which Castiel teaches poetry to fish. Also, himself. Also, eventually, Dean.

(A series-long story, diverging slightly from canon after S14.)

really good cas pov/lore- heavy fic! feat. many fish and actual poetry.

any port in a storm (mature/53k)

The angels have fallen, leaving Castiel graceless and Dean with, well, more of other people’s problems. When a string of couples goes missing on the east coast, Dean and Cas decide to investigate—and find themselves trapped and hunted on a couples’ counseling cruise. Although battling monsters at sea is dangerous enough, sorting through emotional baggage proves to be far more deadly. (And, in which Cas embarks to find his missing grace and Dean is put out. Not necessarily in that order.)

alternate s9, fake dating case fic set on a cruise ship for couples going though rough patches. they have to talk their shit out while cas still adjusts to being human and tries to figure out what metatron might be up to.

ascend (mature/53k)*

Something in the world is wrong.Demon activity is rising where mysterious black substance oozes and unusual ecological events are shaking the world. Dean, grief hanging on his shoulders, restlessly searches for answers that might lead him to the Empty… and to Cas.But what Chuck wrote can’t be undone. The narrative thread pulls Dean along, forcing him to comply. Because once a story already has an ending, it can’t be rewritten.

Or can it?

EXCELLENT fix it/saving cas from the empty fic.

Twas In Another Lifetime (One of Toil and Blood) (explicit/53k)

Ouroboros is a town where the hills whisper sins and trees snatch up kids. It takes a certain kind of grit to brave the heat waves and the shadows that haunt every crossroads. Dean Winchester has cut his teeth in the magic dusted soil, made a life for himself away from the fae that lurks among the humans. When Sam leaves in the middle of the night with no promise of returning, however, Dean’s life turns upside down. He turns to the only fae he’s come to trust, a man with sapphire eyes who goes by the name of James.

Dragged into the magical world around him, Dean now finds himself as the caretaker for James’ half-human, half-fae son, Jack. Dean and James grow closer despite the West’s old secrets and the Fae’s older magic. In a struggle against old fears, longing for family, and desperation to save his brother, Dean must learn to trust what destroyed his father.

magical realism-ish, western-ish au where demons and angels are the fae instead.

The Prophet Must Die (mature/54k)

"What about Castiel? He seems helpful... and dreamy."

Something about the comment just isn't sitting right, and Dean's jaw twitches. He stares at the wall in the dark, and at a quarter past four in the morning, it hits him.

"Asshole," Dean hisses under his breath, sitting up straight, "that sonofabitch kept publishing."

s8, dean finds the supernatural books online and has some Realizations™.  does some pretty clever stuff with established prophet powers and lore. 

Games of Skill and Fortune (teen/54k)

Turns out, time-sharing your brain with a half-crazy archangel nursing a solitaire addiction is even less fun than it sounds.

(In which Dean kicks out one Michael only to go looking for another.)

to keep au!michael from destroying heaven dean becomes the vessel for the og michael, who is not only extremely weak and traumatized from his time in the cage but also has annoying habits like gambling, les mis stanning, and berating dean for leading on his little brother. interesting heaven/angel lore, good michael chara developement.

Tall Grass (explicit/57k)

“I think we should have a garden,” Cas says.

Dean looks up from his beer. He hasn’t had that much to drink, but Cas still has a vague look of unreality about him, a splash of living color that doesn’t fit in the bunker’s echoing stillness. Dean didn’t hear him coming. A lot of the time, Cas is so unobtrusive it feels like Dean has the bunker to himself, with Sam away.

Dean shakes his head to clear it. “A — garden?” he repeats.

cas becomes thee ultimate plant dad. featuring the wayward sisters gang, cathartic character growth, fun oc’s, domesticity, and lots of actual fun botanical facts.

Plain Language (explicit/57k)

Charlie sets her beer down hard on the counter, making him flinch. “Are you trying to invent a problem?” she asks incredulously.

“What? No, dude, I’m telling you—”

“Your boyfriend turned down sex twice, once because you were concussed and your arm was broken, and once because he was about to drive out of state to help your brother,” Charlie summarises, brutal and unrelenting. “And you think that, what? You can never ask him for sex again because of that?”

Dean’s been playing catch-up his entire life, and he’s still figuring out the whole “asking for what I want” thing.

s12-ish au, dean and cas are an established couple but are still, well, not that great at the whole communication part of it

A Judicious Application of Free Will (explicit/57k)

Dean lives the simple life in Lawrence, running the family business at Winchester Hardware. When Castiel moves into the neighborhood, they strike up a friendship that has the chance to become something more. But before that can run its course, the secrets of Castiel’s past catch up with them both, and their whole world changes.

a very old-school, canon-divergent disguised as a full-on au fic. 

Emergence (explicit/58k)*

Something’s been missing from Dean’s life for the past three years, a void left after a hunt gone terribly wrong. He often feels a sense of longing with no discernible cause, a need to talk to someone who isn’t there.

A call from an acquaintance leads Dean to James Novak, a man who disappeared more than a decade ago, and suddenly Dean gets the feeling he’s found what he’s been missing. But James isn’t really James — he’s the angel Castiel, who’s wanted by angels, demons and hunters alike. And he may be at the center of the storm that wrecked Dean’s life all those years ago.

after s11 dean, sam, and eileen have their memories of cas mysteriously erased. three years later they run into a man they only recognize as their friend claire’s long lost father, but dean soon begins to realize that he might be the key to understanding the strange void in his memories and feelings. tw for torture aftermath.

To Mend The Cracks With Gold (explicit/59k)

After almost losing Charlie to the Stynes, and almost losing Cas in the fight that follows, Dean Winchester is ready to do whatever it takes to rid himself of the Mark of Cain. But when the solution turns out to lie in unfinished Winchester business - shutting the gates of hell - Dean begins to realize this is a quest he might not survive.

au where cas saves charlie’s life after her run in with the stynes and works with her (and kevin’s ghost) to reopen heaven, while dean comes up with a new plan to permanently get rid of the mark of cain involving the trials from s8. dark/angsty but has happy ending. tw for canon-typical suicide ideation and child (teen but still) death.

The Shape of Things to Come (mature/62k)

It almost feels like, if Dean went to sleep right now, he could get it back. Like he would slip right back into the dream, and it would pick up where it left off. But Dean doesn’t even want to, now that he can see that world for what it is: a cheap hallucination, poking at all his weaknesses, going right for the soft underbelly Dean never shows.

All that work. All that work Dean had done over the past few weeks, trying to numb himself and act like he’d forgotten about it. And now it feels like the Empty took Cas all of five minutes ago, all over again.

Or,

A post-15x19, forty one year-old Dean gets a taste of what twenty seven year-old Dean went through in 2x20, “What Is and What Should Never Be,” and sees how the shape of his own happiness has changed.

 dean is forced to directly face all the cas-related emotions he’s been suppressing since the confession after a djinn encounter. things get more complicated when he starts getting strange dreams where cas seems to be trying to communicate from the empty.

Issues (mature/63k)

Best friends since childhood, Dean and Cas have been on shaky ground for years now. When an argument somehow leads to a bet about who’s better at relationships - one that calls for six months of living together as fake boyfriends and going to couples therapy every week - Cas may get more than he bargained for . . .

normal world au, dean and cas pretend to date to win a bet and get in over their heads. its from cas’s pov (who is more endverse adjacent characterization wise), and there’s a sequel retelling it from dean’s pov i haven’t read yet. tw’s for drug usage/mentions of past drug usage and overdose.

what stays (and what fades away) (explicit/64k)

Cas Novak’s life is perfect. He has a job that he loves and friends who support him. Most importantly, he has his husband, Dean Winchester, and his two adopted children, Claire and Jack. With them, nothing could ever go wrong.

That is, until he starts having flashes of a life that isn’t his and meets someone who shares his husband’s face but not his personality, someone who insists that he’s someone, something, different altogether. Cas’ life shatters when he’s dragged into a world that he doesn’t belong to and doesn’t understand.

Canon divergent from mid s15, cas gets trapped in a djinn-dream based spell and thinks he has a normal life with dean and their two kids--even after he gets woken up. As they attempt to break the spell and bring cas back to himself dean does a deep dive into both of their memories and has some significant realizations about the ways they’ve both hurt each other over the years, how to start healing, and the true nature of their feelings for each other.

Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) (explicit/66k)

When he wakes, he has no idea who he is. Not his name, what he looks like, or why he’s flat on his back, staring up at the stars littering the night sky.

The first thing he learns about himself is that he has shitty instincts, especially if his first one is to protect the blue-eyed man currently stabbing someone in the face.

Or, the story where two strangers can’t agree on much and know even less, but they’re both fairly certain that they’re in love.

s15, the divorce arc is interrupted early on when dean and cas both lose their memories and come to the reasonable conclusion that they are probably serial killers and also a couple. the memory part is fun but most of the fic is about them reacting to the fallout after remembering everything and slowly working their shit out through various means.

The Goldenrod Revisions (mature/66k)*

A rewrite of Supernatural’s final two episodes, expanded into a five episode arc - in which Chuck needs to be defeated, Castiel deserves to be saved, and the characters in this story get a very different ending.

five new episodes in scripts format following 15x18 that not only resolve every single plot point but goes on to radically restructure the entire world of the series.

True as It Can Be (explicit/71k)

Growing up in a small town in Kansas, Dean learned from a young age that there was only one rule that couldn’t be broken, one place he couldn’t go - through the forest, to the long-abandoned Angel’s Hollow. But when Sam disappears, Dean’s left with no choice but to follow his brother's tracks through the dangers of the wood; little does he know that the most dangerous creature of all lurks not among the trees, but in the Hollow itself. Dean sets Sam free, at the cost of his own liberty - and, bound by magic, resigns himself to living out the rest of his days in the Hollow, at the mercy of the being within. The angel of Angel’s Hollow, however, has a story - is a prisoner, too, as much as Dean is. Only one thing can free them both - but it is impossible. For, after all: who could ever learn to love a beast?

beauty and the beast inspired au.

i want to do with you (what spring does with cherry trees) (explicit/74k)*

Dean keeps going back.

When he arrives, it's always to blooming flowers and a windmill in the background, not too far from a brook, the sun painting the plains.

He likes it there. He likes to stand in front of the makeshift urn and check that it's still where he put it, switching out the flowers when they wilt. He likes to listen to the sound of birds chirping, insects singing, the faint sound of water trickling in the distance. He likes to turn his face up and feel the sun on his skin, wondering if Cas would do the same if he were here, somehow knowing that he would.

He likes to talk.

There's never a response, but Dean feels the breeze rustle through his hair and watches the flowers bob when bees come to them and stares as the windmill keeps turning, turning, turning. And he imagines that Cas is replying—the windmill is the tilted head, the bobbing flowers are a gentle smile, the breeze is whatever words Dean wants to hear at the time.

Sometimes, it's almost like he's there.

widower era-through-alternate post-canon fic inspired by the leaked 13x06 “tombstone” script where dean spread cas’ ashes by the windmill, and they (kind of) get together after his resurrection.

When the Bough Breaks (mature/74k)

Years after the Darkness has been defeated, Dean and Cas are living the apple pie life in small-town Kansas. They don’t hunt anymore, and would like to keep it that way, but some young hunters knocking at their door have different plans.Dean, Cas and Sam reluctantly agree to help out, but what ought to be a simple case becomes way more complicated and dangerous than they counted on. And when the hunt starts to invade the normal lives they've carved out for themselves and their kids, Dean and Cas begin to wonder if escaping the hunting life altogether might have been wishful thinking.

future/kid fic that takes place way after an alternate ending to s11 where dean and cas got together, eventually retired and started a family. I’m not normally a fan of kid oc’s but i actually enjoyed these ones and the way dean cas and sam juggled their new families and lives with their past and not-so-past activities as hunters.

the cost of a thing (mature/74k)

16 months ago, Cas became human.

12 months ago, Cas left the bunker and a broken-hearted Dean behind.

Now they must work a case together, where married couples are dying mysterious deaths and the only way to earn the neighbors' trust is by pretending to be married. Slowly, Dean finds that he loves being in a relationship with Cas, fake or not, and Cas finds his loneliness retreating, despite the harsh reality looming right around the corner. As Dean and Cas navigate this fake, but all too real, relationship, can they find the monster that is on a mysteriously motivated killing spree before it’s too late?

fake married case fic, the trials in s8 were done differently and resulted in dean and cas falling out and sam tries to get them to be friends again by working together on a case. good sam/cas friendship, slow reveal of exactly what happened, interesting new motw.

The Harvelle Gospels (mature/79k-2 part series)*

When Jo was on the cusp of 23, her mother was burned alive in an ambush by some followers of the Yellow-Eyed Demon. Back then she didn’t know this was all part of some cosmic plan, that Ellen was supposed to be the Righteous Woman to set off the Apocalypse. No, she just lost her mother, and she did the only thing she could think of: she sold her soul to the same demons who murdered her. Ellen’s soul was freed and laid to rest, and Jo took up the mantle, and broke when she picked up the knife, broke the whole damn world.

au where jo is the righteous woman/michael sword/protagonist, anna is the angel who raised her from perdition, and sam and dean are just important side characters. jo/anna is the main (albeit slow-burn) pairing, dean/cas still happens but is on and off until the end. really really well done and fun restructuring of canon and character roles to fit in this au.

Really Long Fics (80k+ to 150k)

What is Hidden, What is Seen (mature/83k)*

The Darkness has descended, and Castiel must make a choice. What, in reality, is the nature of Free Will, and where does love end and self-effacement begin? And why didn't Castiel know about the Mark of Cain and its relation to The Darkness in the first place?

alternate s11 where the darkness is an apocalyptic-level problem right off the bat and dean, sam and cas all actually deal with the emotional damage caused by the mark of cain. angsty, cathartic, cool worlbuilding/improving on established lore and worldbuilding).

On the Wings of War (teen/85k)

The four Horsemen are not just people with fancy rings. They aren’t even demons with fancy rings. They are another species entirely, a force unto themselves, and Lucifer is kidding himself if he thinks that they are at his beck and call. They are separate. They are neutral. Dean Winchester is not built like them.

s5, dean fucks around with war’s ring and finds out when he becomes the NEW war. plays fun, fast and loose with biblical lore, michael has some rights, aesthetically a tad lovecraftian. tw for some signifigant body horror.

So Says The Sword (explicit/85k)***

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’

Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

THEEE cas pov/trueform angels/time travel/canon divergent s4 fic of all time. quite literally required reading for ANYONE invested in these characters, even if you haven’t actually watched the show (it’ll still work if you just know some dashboard-osmosis basics). 

tell me about the dream (mature/89k)

“Shut up and listen,” Bobby says. “I ain’t calling about some monster, I’m calling about Castiel.”

Dean freezes in place. “He’s alive?”

“More’n that, Dean. He’s human.”

On instinct, every atom in Dean’s body is on high alert. He starts moving, fingers already reaching for the keys he hangs up on a loose nail next to the door. “Where is he?”

or, in which after lucifer hitches a ride to hell on sam's back, dean makes good on his promise to settle down. so what if it's with cas instead of lisa?

alternate s6 where dean and cas move in together, take in claire, and live a (mostly) normal life.

a way to go (explicit/90k/wip)

God, Cas can fuck him up so easily, like he’s come across a stray thread and is just pulling without a thought. “I’m gonna get us both killed,” Dean promised him, and his voice was choked. Cas’s answering smile was so wide it split his face. “What a way to go.”

After Zachariah’s vision of the future, Dean doesn’t reconcile with his brother. He doesn’t say yes to Michael. Instead, the world slowly goes to hell around him and he finds that all they have left, him and Cas, are each other. Deviation from canon post-5.04.

a road to endverse-but-slightly-to-the left fic where a lot of things change but a few key things, unfortunately, stay the same (also dean’s trans). Unfortunately a wip that hasn’t been updated in quite a while but there’s plenty to read right now and the author appears to still be active so still worth checking out if this sounds good to you imo!

The Most Important Thing (explicit/94k)

Jimmy Novak remembers nothing of the last six years. Reunited with his troubled daughter Claire, he's struggling to raise her on his own. The most important thing is to make Claire happy. But why does he keep having these dreams of wings, and of two men in a black car?

s10 au where due to mysterious circumstances cas has amnesia, believes he is jimmy, and is living with claire and trying to be a good dad. both the dean/cas and the mystery of what happened are slow burn, and claire + her feelings about and relationship with cas are really well written and complex. 

Named (mature/95k)

Jesus Christ is dead. Somehow, that isn't the worst part of Dean's week.

yes jesus is an important character in this, yes he is killed off in the first chapter, yes it is extremely blasphemous in a fun sexy way. old school alternate s5 fic with a very different interpretation of cas’ mission to raise dean from hell, among other things; unfortunately like many other old school fic (2010 in this case) it is rather misogynistic at times and particularly character assassinates anna in one chapter :/. tw for aforementioned blasphemy/misogyny/some ableist language.

take the long way home (explicit/95k)

Three months ago, when Dean decided to retire, he thought his life was going to end up differently. He'd thought that he might get to have it all, Sam, Cas, Jack, and nice little place to live. Instead he gets Sam and Jack off on their Summer of Love Tour, radio silence from Cas, and a never-ending road trip consisting of himself.

Still reeling from the loss of his grace, Castiel travels the country in search of hunts. Driven by a need to prove his usefulness, he pushes himself beyond all limits of endurance.

Together, with the help of a few friends, a crumbling Victorian house, and a stray cat, Dean and Castiel patch themselves back together and create a home together.

late season-ish/post-canon au where sam and dean decide to retire after a hunt goes very bad and cas becomes human, cas becomes a solo hunter after taking this very badly. cas is in a really bad place mentally and sometimes physically for a lot of this and he and dean have a lot of issues but they mostly work it out and end up heading down the road to the vermont b&b dean joked about at some point in the show. also sam and jack are doing their own thing mostly but they show up eventually, and there’s side sam/rowena. tw’s for depression/suicide ideation/animal death/hunt-related self harm/brief non-con attempt (siren attack).

a turn of the earth (mature/95k)

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

time travel fic where s10!cas keeps popping up in pre-canon dean’s life up until the hellhounds take his soul to hell and cas is seemingly completely erased from the timeline. slow burn, sad at times but has happy ending, also at one point cas meets john and immediately punches him in the face.

take the bones, begin anew (mature/103k)

“What else was I supposed to say, Sam?” Dean asks him. “I’m not...look, Cas is my best friend, and I care about him. That’s it.”

“And you renovated a house for him,” Sam continues. “And live with him.”

or: a year in the life, in which it takes some time, but they figure it out

after cas gets out of the empty he and dean a) do NOT effectively talk about the confession and their respective feelings and b) move into kelly’s lake house together, where they figure out their new lives, do some major home renovating, and (eventually) get their shit together. tw for canon typical alchoholism.

dumbassery, denial, doing (the three d’s to the destination) (explicit/108k)*

Freedom is just one adjustment after the next.

au after 15x17. dean finally gets to enjoy a mostly normal life with his friends and family after chuck is defeated sans any love confessions, but soon starts realizing that his feelings for cas aren’t really all that platonic (aka THEE sobsicles reverse confession fic).

Remaining Grace (explicit/109k)

Sam's missing his soul, Castiel has a pissy archangelic nemesis, and Dean wonders if he'll be spending the rest of his life making sure the Apocalypse doesn't go ahead as scheduled. Still, though. He's happy to see Cas. Indiana wasn't really working out.

Alternate season 6, in a universe where Castiel made a different choice, and things snowball from that point forward.

cas reaches out to dean instead of just watching him rake leaves and their soul-bond becomes the key to defeating raphael. tw for temporary major character death/semi-graphic depictions of alcohol withdrawal.

Bumper Cars (e/111k)

Two teenagers are missing from an abandoned carnival, and there’s enough to raise suspicion that their disappearance involves a ghost. Dean, Sam, and Cas arrive in town to investigate, though what they find leads them away from those teenagers, and on the trail of a ghost story that churns up things from their past.

very slow-burn case fic that’s also essentially one big middle finger to john’s parenting skills. tw for descriptions of (past) child/teen death and canonical child abuse.

My Roots Take Flight (mature/125k)*

After forty years in Hell, Dean’s more than willing to accept the offer: become a guardian angel and earn his freedom. But his new ward seems destined to hunt alongside Sam, and there are secrets in Heaven that the angels don’t want found out. Dean’s going to have to choose between his duty and the people he loves- and to work out just where Castiel fits in.

alternate s4/reverse au where cas is a human hunter and dean’s an angel...at first glance anways! tw for brief depiction and frequent mentions of a psychiatric hospital setting/ableist language/graphic torture.

Epic Length Fics (150k+)

Plot Holes (teen/160k)

Of course it wasn’t over after the apocalypse.

There was season six. Then there was season seven. Against all expectations, there was season eight. There were the alphas and purgatory, and then the Leviathans, and then the angels fell. Enter season nine. Loose threads Metatron, Abaddon, and Crowley have to be tied up. Sam, Dean, and Cas have to try to tie them while at the same time dealing with their evolving relationships and newfound graceless states.

Amidst all the chaos, someone has started publishing the Supernatural novels again. Convinced there’s something amiss in the pages, Charlie starts her own quest to suss out the truth behind the Winchester Gospels.

With the help of various faces, old and new, they must now not only deal with the typical runs of demons and recently fallen angels, but also reconcile the battles raging inside themselves, as the fate of the world, once again, quite literally lays in the palm of their hands.

a very metatextual alternate s9, where pretty much all the plot points of s8 are resolved and all the major reality-shaking events of the past few seasons have consequences on an interdimensional scale. 

Cinderwings (mature/181k)*

Under the cover of a masquerade ball, Castiel has five nights to recover the key to his people's freedom. The world has changed greatly in the six centuries since their banishment into the void, but the task isn't impossible. Unfortunately for Castiel, this is going to involve talking to people - especially the Knight Prince who has taken an interest in Castiel and his "costume" wings.

fantasy au loosely based on cinderella, has really excellent worldbuilding and a cool magic system.

time has come today (teen/174k/3 part series) 

Cas fetches 19yr-old Dean from 1998 to help the team with a griffin hunt in 2020. Dean Winchester, being allergic to self-reflection, doesn't love it. What follows is character-oriented Case Fic with Feelings in an S15 pocket-time.

teenage dean (my beloved!!) gets whisked to the present to help with a very important hunt and both he and his older counterpart figure some shit out and bond (when they aren’t getting on each others nerves), and he eventually gets a happy ending/world of his own. good character study, intricate world/reality-building, fun oc’s, and some pretty ingenious solutions to preventing a major time paradox. tw’s for child abuse/mentions of past sex work/very brief implied sexual assault/coercion 

Profoundly Different (explicit/190k)

"Castiel?" Sam calls out, carefully. Both of them lower their guns but don’t put them away, yet: there’s no sign of a struggle, but the guy did just break out of an insane asylum by squishing an orderly. With a bureau that he shouldn't have been able to move. "We're not gonna hurt you. We're here to help. My name is Sam. This is my brother, Dean."There's a loud silence. Dean can hear the wind rustling through the structure.A deep voice suddenly speaks up. It’s coarse and raspy and sounds like it hurts coming out; he’s never heard anything like it. It sends shivers down Dean's spine."Dean?” the man asks. “Dean Winchester?"

(A Season 4 AU: what if the fallen angel Dean and Sam ran into was Castiel, not Anna?)

cas is both the fallen angel instead of anna and the one who raised dean from perdition thanks to time travel, and the main plot points of s4 proceed from there. ngl it gets very horny very quickly but if that’s not your thing there’s quite a lot of plot to work with, and i enjoyed the way things were rewritten to work with the new timeline.

heard from your mother (she don't recognize you) (mature/243k/first part of an in progress series)

A man named Cas wakes up in 2003 with no memories, but he's able to piece together a few things:

Supernatural creatures exist, and most of them will hurt innocent civilians if he doesn't stop them; he has abilities that no human hunter should have, but he knows enough about human hunters to keep that to himself, and finally; he keeps running into another hunter named Dean Winchester, who must be as lonely as he is if he's willing to put up with those former facts long enough to help Cas unravel the mystery of who (or what) he really is.

For his part, Dean's still (not) dealing with Sam's departure to Stanford, and figures distracting himself with a bit of mystery and intrigue is as harmless as it gets, right? Right.

after getting taken by the empty after his confession to dean, cas mysteriously ends up in 2003 with no memories or knowledge of who he is, and ends up becoming a hunter and slowly befriending dean. the fic spans the stanford era and an entire retelling of s1 with some MAJOR changes, and since its clearly A Whole Lot the author very kindly made a chapter by chapter summary. aside from some very short timestamps only the first part of the series is complete, and i’m excited to see what happens next in this version of s2!

Redemption Road (multi-part series/652k)

Team Free Will is sent reeling as Sam struggles with the aftermath of his time in the cage, and Dean struggles to cope with the loss of his best friend. Meanwhile, Castiel's miracles have unforeseen consequences that may force Bobby's hand…

an alternate s7 and onwards that was created by a collaborative writing group back in the lj era (and has aged comparitively well compared to a LOT of popular fics from that time). has a cool take on godstiel and the leviathans/the lovecratian mythos connection, and uses ‘the song of songs’ and the concept of dean raising cas from perdition as major inspirations (for the first part at least). 

ngl when i most recently reread it i only made it about 28% in but imo the casual reader can actually stop around there, the rest concerns a lovecraftian apocalypse that is still good  but not required to enjoy the first half. 

Down to Agincourt (multi-part series/wip/basically a million words)*

The world's already over and they're already dead. All they're doing now is marking time until the end.

yes its a million words and counting. yes its a wip (which i normally avoid) . yes its an endverse fic (which i also normally avoid). and yes its INCREDIBLY difficult to describe. all that being said, its SO good and unique, contains multitudes of lesser tropes (fake dating/slow burn/etc), has phenomenal worldbuilding, complex magic systems, a host of really great and complex original characters, and a surprising amount of pan-hellenic historical/mythological references. most importantly despite being endverse its surprisingly light (relatively speaking) and is not graphic at all when it comes to the canonical aspects of it (orgies/drug use/rampant death/etc), and i actually really like this version of endverse!cas!

tbqh i’ve only read the first three books so far but i honestly recommend trying at least the first one if any of this sounds like it might be up your alley.

#thank u for your patience xoxo #also sorry it’s not longer I’m just veeeery picky when it comes to recommending stuff #deancas #fic #fic recs #spn #mine #pop

[jincherie]

sunshine riptide | ot7

—  COMMISSION  —

⊙  — pairing: ot7 x reader ⊙  — genre: hybrid au, fluff, comfort, found family, ac inspired ⊙  — wc: 13.8k+ ⊙  — warnings: oc has an almost/light anxiety attack towards the end. there is no explicitly mentioned trigger and it isn’t dwelled on for long, but better to let u guys know! ⊙  — notes: here it is! it’s soft, and warm, and I hope that it can be something to cheer up a little bit those who aren’t having such a good day. i love u all,  and I hope you like this piece :) to the commissioner, thank you for allowing me to write this and I truly hope it helps you feel even just a little bit better! <3

Moving to this island whose inhabitants are mostly hybrids was a bit of an impulse decision, something you did with empty pockets barely a cent to your name. Thanks to the kindness of the island’s ‘mayor’ you have a place to stay, the last spare room in a sharehouse with seven hybrids, and for three months he will pay your rent in exchange for you to work in his shop until you are back on your feet. It’s a sweet deal, but when you begin to get along better than expected with your housemates and the deadline for your departure looms ever closer, you’re not sure you’re going to be able to make yourself leave when the time comes. 

— posted; 06.09.2020 | masterlist

“So in exchange for three months paid stay on the island while you get back on your feet, you will work part-time at the Rabbits Den three days a week, and man the desk in the Resident Services Building on Sundays. Is that okay to you?”

You nod eagerly, the ordeal seeming too good to be true and something you’re afraid will be retracted if you don’t act with haste. Mr Bang returns your motion with a little less fervour, the same kind look never leaving his face.

“Perfect, it’s settled then! We’re glad to have you with us, y/n.”

Something lifts from your chest in that moment, as though you’d been walking beneath the cover of a lead blanket and it has finally slipped from your shoulders. You feel a little breathless, and you know the grin that slips onto your face is stupidly wide. Embarrassingly, you feel salty pricks at the corner of your eyes.

“Thank you so much,” you say, and you mean it. It hadn’t exactly been a well thought out plan, moving here with nothing to your name but your most basic possessions, but you’d just needed to escape and start anew and this… this had been the first opportunity you’d seen. The best opportunity you’d seen. “Really, thank you.”

“You’re more than welcome, young lady.” Mr Bang’s expression grows even softer, if possible. “This is a place people come to find refuge, and happiness. You’re welcome here.”

You clear your throat, turning your head to the side and pretending that you need to cough so he doesn’t see the tear that slips out. You have a feeling he knows, though, as you turn back and find him smiling at you, floppy rabbit ears framing his round face. He reaches out, patting you on the shoulder.

“Now, lets find you a room for the night. I’ll send word to the house I have in mind and make sure they have it nice and tidy before your arrival tomorrow. Sound good?”

It hits you only now how tired you are, more emotionally exhausted than anything, and nod while allowing him to lead you down the hall. That does sound good, actually. That sounds amazing.

O – O – O

You’d arrived on this island in the early hours of the morning yesterday, the late-night ferry the only one that runs to this island on the outskirts of the archipelago. It’s likely due to the fact that the captain is a nocturnal hybrid, and hence prefers to run his business under the cover of night. You hadn’t been able to sleep on the trip over, so when Mr Bang had shown you to the room he was happy to lend you for the night, despite it being barely ten o’clock in the morning you’d passed out the second your head hit the pillow. It was more of a nap than anything, but you suspect that the events of the past few months all caught up to you at once because you woke only for dinner and then fell asleep once more. Mr Bang offered no judgement, and simply left a note instructing you where the bathroom is and where you could find towels so that you could freshen up once you awoke. He also left you a coffee bun in a container, since you’d missed the afternoon tea he held the day before.

You hadn’t even been on this island a day and already the kindness of one of the residents was almost bringing you to tears.

Due to the fact that you’d slept far too early, you end up waking up at an ungodly hour the next day, the day you are meant to be moving in to the sharehouse that Mr Bang told you about. Laying in the bed, nestled in the warmth of the covers and watching as the suns rays slowly begin to stain the ceiling and the curtains in rich marigold, you do your best to get yourself together. You can breathe easy now, any anxiety you’d felt previous now nothing more than an echo in your chest. You feel refreshed, and not just from the ridiculous amount of sleep you’ve had in the past twenty-four hours. There are of course some nerves pertaining to meeting your new housemates, but it’s manageable. You have faith that everything will turn out well. It’s a good feeling.

Mr Bang is kind enough to offer you breakfast, and likely would have pushed you to stay for lunch had you not shown up down the stairs with your baggage already in tow. So begrudgingly, he allows you to head on your way, informing you that your new housemates knew of your arrival and had endeavoured to tidy up as much as possible. You thought it was a little funny he was telling you that—just how messy is the house usually?—but he simply shook his head with a smile that told you the answer would come soon enough.

The island isn’t big, but it most definitely isn’t small. The sun is warm and the air cool with a tinge of salt and sea trailing along the breeze, and the path you walk along that skirts the beach is peppered with sand and the odd shell. It makes you happier than anticipated, because just being out here makes you feel so free. Mr Bang told you that the house where you will be staying is on the other side of the island, past the little cluster of shops and small businesses and perched at the edge of the sand, backing onto a river that flows into the ocean and skirted on one side by a small cliff.

“It’s their own little alcove,” Mr Bang had snorted, a mixture of fondness and amusement evident on his features. “They get up to more trouble than I can keep track of over there, but they’re good boys.”

Ah, that’s right. You’d almost forgotten; your new housemates are a bunch of boys. You hope that Mr Bang is right about their character and you won’t be living in discomfort for the next three months.

The path wound and curved a bit, following the edge of the island, and before long you were walking through a section of light forestry. You suspected the house would be on the other side, and were in the midst of thinking just what it would look like when a small squeak! catches your attention and you halt, almost dropping your bag.

It’s silent, save for the way the breeze caresses the leaves around you. You peer around, eyes unable to spot anything in the foliage. Did you imagine it? It’s a little early in your stay to be going crazy. Hesitantly, you adjust your grip on your bag and resume your trek.

Squeak! S-squeeeak!

No, you definitely heard that. You freeze, having gotten a better sense of where the sound is coming from now and turning towards a large tree smothered in vines of varying thickness and clinginess. For a moment, you don’t see anything, eyes squinting hard—it’s like one of those I spy books you used to rave about as a kid— and just when you think you might be looking in the wrong place, you catch movement.

There, in a cluster of the vines dangling from one of the tree’s thicker limbs, is a tiny creature, all tangled up and squeaking in distress.

“Oh my goodness,” you drop your bag, immediately moving closer.  “Poor thing—hold on just a second, bub. I’ll get you out. Promise not to bite me?”

The creature offers a squeak and logically you know it isn’t answering your request, but you pretend it is anyway. Carefully stepping over plants and twigs, thanking past you for wearing more practical boots, you reach where the creature is stuck, dangling just below eye level.

The vines it has managed to get all tangled up in aren’t particularly thick, but there are a lot of them, and it has managed to get a few of its limbs stuck in place. Carefully, you snap a few of the more central ones and ease the tiny thing out, getting a better view of it the more you pull from its body. It’s squeaking all the while, though with much less distress and more of an energy that simply feels chatty. It makes you smile.

“There you go,” you murmur, cradling the tiny baby in your palms and cooing, trying to calm the heartbeat and hurried breaths you can feel racing against your skin. You stroke along its back as lightly as you can manage. “Oh, you’re a little sugar glider! You’re so pretty, such a cutie. Look at your markings, wow… so pretty.”

Almost as though it can understand your praise and is basking in it, it flicks its bushy tail and rolls in your palm, like a cat rubbing against something with its cheek except this little glider is doing it with its whole body. It’s awfully friendly, you note. Perhaps much of the wildlife here is more peacefully accustomed to human and hybrid activity.

“Okay, you’re free now. I’ll stop ogling at you and let you go,” you say, holding your hands up to a part of the tree that isn’t covered in vines lest there be a repeat of the earlier situation. The sugar glider merely blinks, eyes still on you, and doesn’t move. Brows drawn in confusion, you move your hands closer to the tree, “Well, aren’t you going to—oh!”

Faster than you can react, the little thing darts from your hands, leaping to your bicep and scurrying up with tiny claws in your shirt to your shoulder. Once at its apparent destination, it rushes to the crook of your neck and makes itself at home, nestling against you and securing itself with its tail partway around the back of your neck and its little paws clutching your shirt edge. You giggle, still in shock and trying not to jostle it off as you fight the ticklish sensation.

“Okay. I guess you can come with me. I’m not sure if you can stay the whole while, but I’m sure it will be okay while I walk.”

So off you go, bending and retrieving your bag carefully so you don’t dislodge your tiny new companion. You’ve seen a bit of sugar gliders, but the way this one is acting is quite peculiar. If it sticks around until you arrive at the house, you’d love to snap a quick picture because it really is so pretty, so cute.

The trip is faster than anticipated, now there is something else to occupy your thoughts. Before you know it you’re out of the forestry and approaching a large, modern three storey building that is probably just a few yards short of a mansion, nestled between the ocean, the river, and a short cliff-face just barely higher than the roof. This is the place for sure.

The little glider seems to perk up, the closer you get, something that surprises you since it was so quiet you thought it was asleep. With a soft noise, it grabs onto your hair with tiny paws and scurries to the top of your head, likely making a mess of it in the process but it’s so cute you can’t bring yourself to mind. At least it will be an interesting first impression.

As you approach the front door, you think you see movement in one of the windows on the ground floor. You almost dismiss it as you reach the eve, until you catch the hurried patter of feet against hardwood from beyond the door.

You barely manage to blink before the door is flying open, a man with raven curls and two fluffy russet ears peeking between the locks presenting you with the biggest grin you have ever seen on anyone’s face. It’s boyish and cute, a direct contrast to the mature, sculpted features of his face.

“Hello!” he says, and you catch sight of a long, fluffy russet tail whipping behind him and betraying his excitement—not that he was doing much to hide it. “You must be the new roomie! It’s nice to meet you! We’ve been waiting all morning, and one of us actually went to pick you up but… I’m not sure where he is.”

You’re a little overwhelmed but easily recover when he simply keeps looking at you so happily, returning the man’s bright smile. There’s rustling in your hair at the back of your head but you ignore it, adjusting your grasp on your bag. “Ah, thank you. I’m y/n, it’s nice to meet you…?”

The man pulls back, a sheepish look on his face that accompanies a light flush in his cheeks. “Oh, right. I’m Taehyung. Sorry. My hyungs tell me I tend to get a bit ahead of myself sometimes.”

You keep the smile on your face. “That’s okay, we got there in the end. It’s nice to meet you, Taehyung.”

Taehyung brightens, tail curling happily behind him. He opens his mouth to say something, but is interrupted from a voice to the side.

“Are you going to make our poor new housemate wait outside all day, Tae?”

The light blush colouring Taehyung’s cheeks deepens, a sheepish laugh escaping. “No. I was just about to invite her in!”

He steps back and reveals the person behind him who had spoken, a tall man with dimples and silvery hair that did little to conceal the large, rounded grey ears atop his head. He seems a little awkward in his stance, like he has more body than he knows what to do with, but still extends an arm in greeting with a kind smile. “y/n, is it? Welcome, please come in. I hope you’ll enjoy your stay here with us, however brief. We’re happy to have you.”

Don’t cry, don’t cry! If you cry now you can never show your face here again. You clear your throat, returning his smile as you step inside and out of the sun, the difference in temperature against your skin immediate. “Thank you, I really appreciate your generosity in letting me stay here.”

“Nonsense,” Taehyung snorts, “Namjoon-hyung has been saying for months we should find someone to fill the spare room, and now you show up on our doorstep! It’s perfect.”

The taller, who Taehyung had referenced as Namjoon, seems a little bashful, his cheeks heating. Does everyone in this house blush so easily? You hope it’s not contagious.

There is movement in your hair again, the glider apparently needing to breathe, and you have your mouth open ready to explain when Namjoon beats you to it.

“Oh, I see you’ve met Jimin already!”

What?

The glider leaps from your head and onto Taehyung’s outstretched arm, climbing to his head before leaping from that too and gliding through the air, all the way around the corner. There is a small clutter, the sound of a light swearword entering the air, and then the ever-familiar patter of feet against hardwood. Another boy rounds the corner, ashy-blond hair tousled and parted by two small grey ears, bushy tail curling behind him.

He skids to a stop in front of you, dipping in a brief bow before rising and shooting you a bright smile. “Hello! Thank you for helping me! I’m Jimin, welcome home!”

It takes all of your willpower to keep the happy tears at bay as you tilt your head back and laugh, already feeling lighter than you ever remember feeling before.

O – O – O

Your next introductions to the hybrids you will be sharing your home with for the next three months go much smoother and without as many surprises as the last ones. Jimin, who seems to have warmed up to you quickly, was more than happy to take you on a tour of the house and to go through introductions while he was at it. He happily told you who was what hybrid as well, without you asking. You figured that he realised your underperforming human nose wouldn’t be able to tell, so he took the initiative and you’re thankful for it, because you were curious.

The oldest resident of the house is Seokjin, a red-panda hybrid who goes on a spree of stress-baking every time exam season rolls around. Most of the hybrids study online, as you learnt from Jimin’s excited chattering. The second you met Jin, as he preferred to be called, you were stunned at how handsome he was. Of course, any awe that rooted you to the spot quickly dissipated as he said a joke so painfully funny it left you with whiplash between the urge to roll your eyes and guffaw. You like him, though. He’s nice.

You quickly discover that all the inhabitants of this house are, though. Yoongi is the second oldest and a squirrel glider hybrid—something Jimin said he found funny since he was closest to Jimin, a sugar glider, and Hoseok, the third oldest and a sunny squirrel hybrid. He giggled as he told you, and you couldn’t hide your own smile even as Yoongi’s ear had flicked and he’d shot the two of you a suspicious look. The little fun fact Jimin had told you about Yoongi had taken you by surprise; he remotely operates the island’s radio, many of the tunes ones he has created himself. Often, if there is a festival, he will volunteer his time to work the music jobs there, too. Apparently Namjoon also pitches in, and Hoseok when he has free time outside of the classes he teaches on the other side of the island.

Hoseok is a dancer, Jimin had gushed, and while he teaches at the school part time, he also volunteers time outside of that to hold dance classes for the kids. Jimin told you that he joins occasionally, but less often lately since his workload for university has increased. He did tell you, though, that the youngest of the house had all but taken his place, his youthful heart at home mucking around with kids and helping them learn.

Jungkook is his name, and Jimin informed you with a very fond and very amused look that he is rather shy, so you might not see him for a few days. Apparently it had been uttered just loud enough for the hybrid in question to catch it though, because there was a tumbling sound from the floor above and a series of stomping footsteps. A head of long, wavy inky hair had popped over the railing, grey ears pinned back as a baby-faced boy delivered a glare to the blonde to your side.

“Hyung! That’s not true! I’m not too shy to even introduce myself!” he had defended himself avidly, red-faced and huffy. When his eyes turned to you, mouth open to follow through on his words, he abruptly shrank and all that escaped was a squeak. It took him a moment to conjure speech once more, and this time he was noticeably less bold. “I’m—I’m Jungkook! It’s nice to meet you! I have to go now! Goodbye!”

And then he was gone, and so concluded your final introduction to the residents you had yet to meet. You thought you had a good feeling when you first arrived, but now that you’ve met everyone and everything feels that bit more real, you find yourself thinking…

It’s a really good feeling.

O – O – O

“It’s not what it looks like!”

You raise a brow, book in hand as you stand at the edge of the sand bank where green bleeds into gold. Against your heels is cool grass, and your toes are dipped in the gentle warmth of the sand. Namjoon sits in front of you, beneath a tree protruding from the dune, with a bundle of leaves in his hand and a guilty look in his face.

“Isn’t eucalyptus toxic to humans and hybrids?”

“I’m not eating it!” Namjoon waves his hands in a frantic bid to assure you, eyes wide, and almost drops the leaves in question. His large, grey ears flick in his distress. “I was just… I know I can’t eat it but it smells so good… I was just sniffing it. It calms me.”

You let out a light laugh, walking closer and plopping down on the sand beside him, beneath the generous shade the tree offers. The sea breeze is kind and cools your skin where it smarts from the sun, tickling your neck and manipulating your hair into a tumbleweed. Namjoon snorts, helping you get it back in order.

“No judgement,” you say, crossing your legs and placing your book in your lap for the meantime. “Just wanted to make sure I wouldn’t have to take you to a hospital, because I do not know where to find one on this island.”

Namjoon grins, rosy cheeks complimenting his skin the way it glows gold in the sun’s glare. “You’d drag little ol’ me all the way to the hospital if you knew where it was?”

“Well, yeah,” you laugh, sifting sand through your fingers as you relish the sound of waves crashing barely a yard away. It’s so peaceful, you feel so at peace. “Since none of you seem to know what a car is.”

“We had a car,” Namjoon admits, face flushing violently as he averts his gaze, turning his head. “There was just, um, an unfortunate incident… that may have involved a tree, or two…”

You decide not to probe further, lest your current good impression of Namjoon come under threat. A beat of silence passes, before Namjoon shuffles, placing the bundle of leaves back on the grass. He angles his body a little more towards you, sniffing subtly.

“So… how is your stay so far? Is everything going okay?”

You can’t hide the expression of surprise that makes its way to your face as you turn to him, blinking. You don’t know what you were expecting, but for some reason it hadn’t been that. It’s awfully nice of him.

You’ve been on the island almost a week now. The interactions you’ve had with your housemates so far, though not too bountiful, have all been pleasant, and you genuinely have nothing to complain about. You haven’t seen much of Jungkook, Hoseok, or Yoongi—but that mostly comes down to incompatible work hours and commitments. Mr Bang’s nephews run the Rabbit’s Den, the local convenience store that occasionally hosts a few exotic goods, and they have been nothing short of helpful, polite, and friendly while you worked there. You have worked a single shift at the Resident Services Building too, and it was pretty chill. A few residents came in, happily introduced themselves to you, and then you helped them with whatever had warranted their visit. All in all, your stay has been amazing so far.

“It’s been good,” you say, and it feels so nice to have the words escaping your mouth be true to the warmth in your chest. “Everyone here is super nice. It does feel a bit odd though, sometimes I feel like I’m the only human here.”

“Oh, yeah. You are,” Namjoon huffs an amused laugh. “You’re the first human Mr Bang has allowed on this island.”

Your surprise is evident, and it makes him smile when he turns his head to give you a sly look. “He must have had a good feeling about you. Rabbit hybrids tend to rely a lot on their gut feelings and intuition.”

“Oh,” you say, cheeks warming. Well, you’re glad he had decided to let you in. You say as much to Namjoon, and he smiles brightly at you.

“We’re glad he decided to let you in, too.”

You’re not sure what to say to that, a little embarrassed from the unexpectedness of it—was he really telling the truth? You’d hardly spent any time with some of your other housemates…

A calm silence begins to settle between you, and you take the time to open your book and resume where you left off. You get so carried away reading that when you finally look up some time later, the sight to your side almost makes you gasp.

Namjoon had, at some point, fallen asleep in a little patch of sunlight that manage to pierce through the foliage—in the place of the large, long-limbed man you had been talking to is now a considerably smaller fluffy koala, sitting upright and snoozing lightly. You suspect this isn’t the most ideal position for him to be sleeping in, though, because every few moments he will sway on the spot, almost tipping but not quite going far enough to have an abrupt meeting with the sand.

You coo, unable to help it, but the sound quickly grows alarmed when he leans too far—before you can think your arms shoot out to hold him up, but it seems there is something true to what is said about koalas being clingy because the second he feels something touch him, koala Namjoon clings.

You squeak, a fully-grown koala now wrapped around your forearm. Slowly, you bring it closer to you (feeling your bicep burn all the while because damn is he heavier than he looks!), planning to use your other hand to ease him off, but it seems that the second you’re close enough he can sense your warmth and he wants in. You sit, exasperated and amused, with a koala now latched to your midriff, arm forgotten. Both your hands are now free, but at what cost?

You figure that he’ll probably let go when he wakes up, or he might fall back into the sand in his sleep, but until then you resign yourself to unexpected but definitely not unwelcome koala cuddles. You just hope he won’t be too embarrassed when he wakes up; you can already see him stuttering and going red in your mind’s eye. It brings a chuckle to your lips, and with a smile on your face you return to your book once more, a little more content than before.

O – O – O

 It’s been a while since you’ve had to deal with the dreams.

Usually, once they start you can wake yourself up, or you can manage to turn them around if they’re one you’ve had before. But some nights, when the dreams come, you’re helpless but to see them play out. Sometimes they’re not that bad, but even the milder ones leave you with a nauseous ball of anxiety beneath your lungs and a feeling of discomfort that digs claws deep in your bones.

About three weeks into your stay, you wake up after one such dream, a cursory glance to your phone and the painful glare of its screen revealing it to be the early hours of the morning. For a moment you simply lay, blinking, with your gaze rooted on the ceiling. You had strung up some fairy lights around your dresser, and on the plaster above you the soft colourful rainbow of their hue meshes and blends with the cool pools of moonlight slipping through your curtains.

Absently, and with a sense of resignation that you feel in your bones, you strip the cover back and climb out of bed, deciding you may as well grab some water since you’re likely not going to be able to fall asleep very easily anytime soon.

As you make your way through the levels to the ground floor where the kitchen resides, you’re careful to be as quiet as possible—you’re not sure how successful your effort is but you do know that quite a few of your housemates have been inundated with coursework lately and you don’t want to disturb any of the valuable rest they need so badly. Jimin had looked so wiped out yesterday that you’d literally had to pull him away from the dishes and send him to bed. He complained on the way, but as soon as his head hit his pillow he was out, leaving you in a mixture of awe and concern. He explained as soon as he woke the next morning that he had been up all night completing an assignment, and it made you realise just how exhausted a lot of your roommates seem lately. You hope this period passes soon for them; you may not have been here long but you have grown to care for them and you don’t like seeing them so unwell.

You’re just pondering this when you reach the ground floor and venture into the kitchen, thoughts and feet coming to an abrupt stop as you take in the sight that greets you there.

Seokjin is standing by the bench, hands moving slowly as he puts something together just out of your view. A quick survey of the rest of the countertop tells you that he’s making lunches, and while ordinarily this would touch your heart (as it does every time you see how each of the hybrids in this house cares for each other), this time you’re overcome with a strong wave of concern.

Delicately put, Seokjin looks dead on his feet.

Every few moments his head bobs down, chin almost hitting his chest before he jerks awake just long enough to lift his head, before the cycle repeats once more. He looks so exhausted you’re impressed he managed to make as many lunches as he did. Though, from the looks of it he’s only about halfway through.

“Hey, Seokjin… are you okay?”

The hybrid jumps, the startle you gave him probably rendering him more awake than he has been in a few hours.

“Wh—what are you doing awake?” he sputters, having to lean against the bench so that he doesn’t fall over. “It’s almost midnight!”

You can’t help the look you give him, a mixture between amusement and concern. “Um… it’s a little past midnight actually… probably closer to two… are you alright?”

Seokjin blinks at you for a second while your words sink in, before he sags with a light groan, bringing a hand up to scrub at his eyes.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, voice thick with sleepiness. His bushy, striped tail sways behind him before curling around his thigh. “I’m just… kind of wiped out. I was up finishing a part of a really big assessment piece and it took longer than I thought… I was going to go to bed but then I remembered that I hadn’t prepared the boys’ lunches, and I always do that, so I came down here and…”

He makes a great, sweeping gesture over the mess on the bench, a result of his patchy attention. A huff of laughter escapes him. “Yeah.”

“I’m glad you finished your piece, but… do you really have to make their lunches? I think you should probably get some sleep…”

You were a little worried he might take your words the wrong way, but you can tell from the serene expression on his face that he doesn’t. “I always do it. If I don’t, then they might worry about me, and I don’t want them to worry about me when they should spend that energy worrying about themselves. Plus, I don’t know if I’d be able to sleep if I knew they weren’t done.”

You return his amused smile, taking a step closer and willing yourself to speak the idea that had come to mind.

“Well, considering I found you almost sleeping on the spot when I came down, I think you should probably call it a night and get some rest. I’d be happy to finish up and make sure the lunches are done, if you’d like?”

You can see the resistance immediately, the tall man opening his mouth to refuse—but he halts, and for a moment slips into his own thoughts. Sensing that he just needs a little push, you continue, “If you tell me what you usually make, I should be able to finish the rest of them without too much trouble.”

He blinks, and in that moment you see the rest of his exhaustion flood to the surface. He sniffles, unable to fight the yawn that rises. “… Okay. If that’s really alright with you…?”

You laugh, reaching to bump Seokjin’s side. “Of course it is. I don’t mind at all, especially if it means you’ll go to sleep in your bed and not on the kitchen floor. Now, what do you normally make…?”

Letting out a soft laugh, Seokjin does his best to stay awake long enough to instruct you on what he makes and how he makes it for the remaining members of the household. You can’t help but notice throughout his explanation that he doesn’t seem to make lunch for himself despite making it for everyone else, and as he finally plods off to bed and passes out, you make the decision that you’re going to make some lunch for him too. It takes you a brief google search on the diet of red pandas and their hybrid counterparts, as well and recalling what you know of Seokjin’s taste in food, but it doesn’t take you too long to decide on what to make. You work through the lunches one by one, grateful for the distraction, and complete the task fully when Seokjin’s sits primly next to the rest. You pile them all into the fridge, washing your hands again before grabbing the water you originally came down for, and then you’re making the trip back upstairs to your own bed, a soft smile on your face and a warm satisfaction curling around your lungs. You fall asleep easier than expected for a night where you had one of those dreams, but there most definitely aren’t any complaints to be found as you drift off with a faint smile on your lips.

--

The next day, it’s only a little before midday when Seokjin finally rises from his slumber and makes his way downstairs. Blearily, he reaches the kitchen and heads straight to the fridge, attempting to think through his sleep-addled brain what he should make for lunch. Those thoughts are interrupted as he catches sight of a box he hasn’t seen outside of the little tupperware cupboard by the stove in ages sitting on the middle shelf, a little paper tag with ‘for Seokjin’ scribbled onto it perched on top.

He pulls it out and places it on the bench, staring in confusion. It takes him an embarrassingly long time to kick his limbs into gear and open it, but from that point on the realisation comes quickly with the memory of last night.

You’d gone and made lunch for him, too. And from the looks of it, you’d paid great attention to what to include.

His stomach rumbles violently as he takes in the sight of berries and the bamboo shoots he usually stores in the fridge that you must have taken the time to boil and season. There is a sandwich in there as well but he doesn’t need to check whether he will like it because he can already smell the salmon.

He doesn’t know what to think, or really what to say. He knows he’s just lucky you’ve already gone to work at the Rabbit’s Den because otherwise you would probably be here and risk seeing his eyes tear up a little.

A side effect from being sleepy and stressed is the dramatics, he knows, but still… he can’t help but notice the warm feeling that lingers in his stomach when he thinks of how nice you are to do such a thing.

O—O—O

“You’re gonna love it when we get there, y/n! It’s so pretty, and there’s so much fruit… I’m going to feast.”

You can’t help but let out a laugh, thoroughly enjoying the company of your two housemates and the combination of cool breeze and warm sunlight the air offers as they kiss your skin. It’s earlier in the morning than you tend to wake up, but you’ve been invited out on an exclusive adventure and you aren’t in any position to say no. For the past few weeks you’ve noticed that on a Saturday and Sunday morning, Taehyung tends to disappear. You don’t know where, and each time you saw him again you forgot to ask, but finally the opportunity had arisen for you to sate your curiosity. Happily, the lemur hybrid had informed you that there is a small section of the island towards the north that is absolutely packed with trees, bushes and otherwise, all peppered with ripe fruit. Some days he goes to tend to them, but on the weekends he confessed to you that he normally goes to harvest the literal fruits of his labour.

“Just don’t eat all of the tamarind again, Jiminie, or I will have to kill you myself.”

Jimin lets out a loud laugh, stumbling in his gait for a moment from the force of it. “Yessir! Understood, sir!”

Taehyung’s lips quirk into a smile, and he returns his gaze to the front to continue marching ahead and leading the two of you to his secret spot. You adjust your hold on the woven bag over your shoulder, brushing away some of the more unruly strands of hair that have made their way across your face by riding on the breeze.

“Thanks again for inviting me, Tae,” you say, unable to hide the skip in your step as you plod along after them, smiling brightly. “I’ve been wanting to explore more—it feels wrong that I’ve been here for a month and barely seen everything there is to see.”

Taehyung spins to flash you a beaming grin over his shoulder, ears flicking and tail curling happily. “Of course, it’s no problem! I did wonder if you’d like to come some time, so I’m glad you mentioned it the other day.”

Jimin gasps, the sound somewhere between playful and affronted. “You asked her yourself to come?! I had to beg for weeks! Weeks!”

“I told you, the fruit weren’t done when you first asked!” Taehyung whines, reaching back and pausing in his steps just long enough to whack Jimin on the shoulder. “You just didn’t listen!”

“I’m baby,” Jimin says, whether in affirmation or explanation you’re not sure. It manages to tear a laugh from Taehyung either way, and you’re no different.

You’re not left stewing in anticipation for long; before you know it you’re broaching the place that Taehyung and Jimin speak so highly of. Rounding a corner, you come across a large grove that ends beyond what your eyes can see—some trees curl and wind, others stand straight and proud with their roots covered modestly with smaller shrubbery. Vines cling and string around some trunks, but the one thing all of the flora in front of you has in common is that they’re all ripe with fruit, ready to be picked.

“Oh wow,” you remark, barely aware you’ve even said anything. A deep laugh sounds from beside you and you turn to see Taehyung grinning brightly, tail curling happily behind him and his little ears flicking with glee.

“Pretty, right? Some of these were already growing here when I found it, like the apples, but the rest of it I planted over time. I’m proud of how it’s turned out.”

“You should be!” you exclaim, pointing to the fruit displayed in the very image of temptation before you all. “Dude, they look delicious.”

“They are!” Jimin chimes in, flitting past you and snagging his finger in your sleeve as he goes to drag you along. “Come on, there’s a mulberry tree up the back and it has the juiciest berries. We have to pick them now before all the birds and fruit bats get them.”

Laughing, you allow the sugar glider hybrid to lead you into the grove of greenery, the man ducking and weaving around branches with ease as his feet follow a path well-worn into the dirt and grass. The splotches of sunlight that filter through the foliage are pleasant where they warm your skin, breeze ensuring you don’t get too hot beneath the kiss of a star. In the shadows of the trees, it is actually much cooler than you expected, but you can’t help but feel that the temperature, the air, the sights—everything feels perfect.

The mulberry tree, fondly called Ol’ Bessy as Jimin had eagerly informed you, is a large, looming monster of a tree with a plethora of winding trunks and subordinate thin branches that dangle and sway in the breeze in the image of a weeping willow. When you comment on the sheer size of it, Taehyung simply shrugs and tells you with a smile that it’s been here a long time, before anyone was on the island.

The three of you don't have much desire to waste any more time standing and dawdling, and so you begin your activity for the day, woven bags and baskets prepared and at the ready. You inspect the mulberries that are hanging lowest, spying the occasional green one but becoming easily appeased when you find bunches of ripe ones, plump and fit to burst as they weigh the thinner branches down.

Gathering them is harder than anticipated, because you hadn't accounted for the fact they they're, well, berries. It takes a few attempts and more than a few instances of stained hands before you figure out the best way to pluck them from the tree without bursting them. Taehyung saw the first one you popped and the way it went all up your arm, and hasn't stopped laughing since.

The three of you bounce between fruits and trees, filling your containers with whichever you prefer. After a while though you all seem to have the same idea to congregate at the mulberry tree. Admittedly, you hadn't been able to stop yourself from munching on some of the fruits as you picked them, but as you look at them and see berry stains around their mouths and apple leaves in their hair, you feel a little less guilty about it. Taehyung places his basket down, leaning it securely against the base of the tree trunk, before dusting his hands with a sharp clap and then resting them on his hips.

"Right," he says, eyes alight. "There's just one more tree to visit. I think you're gonna love it."

You tilt your head, wondering just what other kind of fruit he has up his sleeve when already you've picked so many. Surely he's constrained even a little bit by the climate? Or does he have magically green thumbs? Jimin giggles at your confused expression.

"How good are you at climbing trees?"

The question gives you pause. "Uh... decent? I suppose?"

"Great!" Taehyung exclaims, picking his basket back up and closing the lid to help secure it on his back. "Let's go!"

Once more you're lead in between and through the trees and shrubs, following the gleeful lemur hybrid and his grinning companion back to the middle of the grove. Before long you're stumbling to a halt, having reached the location and wondering how on earth you managed to miss this tree before.

It's bigger than Ol' Bessy by a decent margin, but confusion filters through you when you can't seem to spot any fruit hanging from its branches. You turn to Taehyung, about to question him, but he simply grins and darts over to the massive trunk (really, you don't think two of you could hug it from either side and have your fingers touch, it's so big). It's only after he begins scaling it with alarming ease that you take note of the grooves and footholds curled into the trunk, making it a naturally perfect tree for climbing. Jimin darts up after his friend, apparently also well-versed in the art of climbing this tree, and breaks you from your awed reverie with a shout over his shoulder.

"Come on, y/n! Or Tae is gonna take the good spot!"

Unsure what he means and unsure if you're willing to find out via Taehyung following through on that, you scramble to follow after them and do your best to climb.

It's easier than anticipated, actually, and dare you say it... relaxing. Though you're going higher and higher with each branch you clear, and see less of the ground and more of the canopy with each step, you can't say you're all that scared, or worried. If anything, it's as though a moment of peace has been captured in a bubble, and now settles like cool mist on a spring morning at the bottom of your chest.

In sharp contrast to the cool breeze that brushes your face as you emerge from the thickest part of the foliage, the sun is quick to kiss warmth back into your cheeks. For a moment, you have to pause in your climb, because the view around you is simply so beautiful you're at an absolute loss for words.

From here, the highest point in the grove, you can see a vast majority of the island, a sweeping panorama of lush greens and soft sands that blend into the crystalline waters of the ocean, sunlight turning the surface to a sea of diamonds. Along the stretch of beach, in the distance, you can just barely glimpse the sharehouse, and on the other side of the island the little market square where all the stores and restaurants are appears as smudges and blobs of dark colours.

"It's so beautiful, right?"

You're so immersed in your observation that for a second you almost don't even register that someone is talking to you. Mouth open in awe, you simply turn your expression to Taehyung; the lemur laughs, almost tumbling back from the force of it, and you're shocked back into the moment with worry until you see what stopped him from falling.

Here, at the very top of the tallest tree in Taehyung's secret grove, he has built a small little fixture, a deck with enough space for four people to squeeze onto it at most. It hugs the trunk of the tree and is braced on the few thick branches that split from the tree beneath it. A lot of it is untouched, natural wood, but the bottom is made of processed planks and some of the short balcony ledge has been painted with acrylics, little scenes spanning the length of the strips. You didn't know Taehyung painted, but figure you'll bring it up at another time when you aren't precariously clinging to the top of a massive tree.

Taking the hand that both men offer you, you haul yourself carefully up and onto the deck, marvelling as you get an even clearer view of the island from your new position.

"It really is," you answer him, somewhat belatedly. When the two of them settle down, tree swaying much like you imagine a ship would on the vast expanse of the ocean, you follow suit, with your back pressed securely to the trunk.

Jimin is already flinging open his container, smacking it onto the wood in front of him, and Taehyung laughs once more, the sound so freeing and light that it makes that little bubble of peace in your abdomen expand ever so slightly.

"And now, we feast!" The lemur says, eagerly opening his own basket and setting it in front of him, besides Jimin's. They're both set to overflow from the amount of fresh, ripe fruit piled in.

They shamelessly and unabashedly dig in, eliciting a laugh from you as you move your own bag before you to do the same. It's nice, the perfect lunch in more ways than one; the small amount of foliage above you offers just enough shade that you want for nothing more in the moment besides maybe a pillow or two, everything else accounted for in excess.

You're not sure how long you spend there, but you do know that the sun has made a decent amount of headway in its journey across the sky by the time the three of you are done stuffing your stomachs full, laying across the deck and squinting until the clouds swimming leisurely across the sky begin to resemble something you can put a name to. It's fun, and light, and for what is alarmingly far from the first time, you find yourself so thankful for the choices you made and the path that led you here, to be staying on this beautiful island with these lovely boys.

By time you finish and the three of you are heading back, you’ve eaten through half of the fruit and the boys are so full and sleepy from the big day that they’ve shifted into their animal forms and are now clinging to you, Taehyung with his long limbs around your neck and Jimin with his tiny paws clinging to the hair at the top of your head. You suspect he’s made himself another little nest up there, but can’t find it in yourself to be upset with him for it especially when the soft sounds and chitters he makes to communicate with Taehyung are so damn cute.

The trip back is shorter than you recall, and before you know it you’re approaching the sharehouse once more, it’s looming sides graced with the warm gleam of afternoon sun. Jimin and Taehyung are asleep as you reach the front door, and you’re saved from having to move all the bags and baskets in your hold to open the door when it opens for you. Hoseok is standing there, a startled look gracing his features that quickly blends into one of fondness as he sees his friends, something that makes your cheeks warm ever so slightly.

“Good day?” he asks, stepping back to let you in. You nod, unable to help the wide grin touching your lips.

“Yeah, it was.”

O – O – O

‘…They should be setting up a tower soon, so hopefully it won’t be long before I can call you again. But until then, I look forward to every letter you send, bubbles.

Write back soon! I miss you.

Love, Dad’

You sniffle, trying not to let out the tears that are so close to slipping from your eyes. You’re not all that upset, you love receiving letters from your father, but it’s just… a little bittersweet. You’d moved here to escape your family, following a certain incident that you’re not keen to revisit, and your father had always been and will always be supportive of you— but it’s hard, when he’s halfway across the globe on one expedition or another.

It was only in the past ten years that your father managed to snag the job of his dreams and follow the passion he’s harboured since he was a child, graduating from his career as an accountant through attention garnered from numerous big research papers to become a well-respected biologist. From the second he accepted the offer, he’d started down a path that led him spending a majority of his life outside of the home and always on the move, hopping from one destination to another.

Whenever he could, he’d take you with him, but he wasn’t always able to. This expedition, which has landed him in the Antarctic, is an example of that. While he can’t be with you physically, he writes often and calls every chance he gets—and though it saddens you sometimes when it highlights the dismal state of the rest of your family, more than anything you’re happy for him and overjoyed that after years of slaving in an office, he finally gets to do what he wants.

You inhale, closing your eyes and trying to let the breath escape in a long, level manner. It’s night, not when you normally go about reading letters from your father but this letter had come late and you’d almost completely forgotten on your way to bed. Taking the opportunity to get some fresh air, you’d taken the letter and made yourself comfortable on the balcony, using the ample moonlight as a makeshift reading lamp.

Placing the letter carefully on the table, mindful not to place it in anything dirty or unsavoury, you settle back in your chair and tilt your gaze to the skies, allowing your eyes to become unfocused and simply stare. It's a pretty sight, as you expected-- the stars are much more outgoing here, with no haze or pollution masking their display like in the city on the mainland.

You let out a breath, but even to your ears it sounds more like a sigh. You miss your dad, and you know he misses you too but despite the fact you know it's selfish of you, you kind of wish he had been here with you when you made the decision to move. Of course, you've told him all about it, and he's supported you wholly in every choice you've made, but it's not the same. You don't blame him, and you love him dearly, but still... you're allowed to be sad, just a little. Just for tonight.

Well, that had been your plan-- apparently the universe has other ideas that don't include sulking in the moonlight on your balcony. A scuffling sound disturbs your reverie from the side of your balcony, and you look over in time to see a decent blob of shadow scaling up the side of the balcony next to yours and flinging onto the railing. Once there, it halts, and your eyes adjust just in time to meet those of the creature-- the raccoon, you realise quickly. It tilts its head up, sniffling the air once, before pinning you with an unreadable look. For a moment the two of you sit in silence, locked in place by the other's gaze, before the raccoon lets out a soft noise and then it's little claws are clacking against the hollow metal railing, and it disappears beyond the wall.

Whose room is that... Jungkook's? You muse to yourself for a moment before you remember what kind of hybrid Jungkook is, and in the next second there is the sound of a door sliding shut and Jungkook's bright-eyed face pops around the side of the wall.

"Uh... are you okay?"

You blink, brain taking a moment to catch up and then decipher how he could have possibly known you were even a little bit upset. You recall suddenly that animals can pick up cues, like chemoreceptors, and tilt your head at him with a small smile.

"Yeah... no... I'm alright." You angle yourself more towards him in your chair, cheering internally when you see him stop hiding behind the wall and come to lean against the railing. "Was that you? Where were you off to, this time of night?"

Jungkook looks like he wishes to address the first thing you said, but your follow-up has thrown him a bit for a loop. You can't be sure your eyes aren't deceiving you, but you could almost swear he's blushing.

"Oh, yeah... sorry." He reaches a hand up to rub the back of his neck, hair mussed and eyes averted. "I know my animal form isn't that nice... sorry if you thought it was gross."

"What?!"

At the sheer suddenness and volume of your almost-shriek, Jungkook jumps about a foot in the air. His wide eyes swing back to you, chest heaving as he rests his hand in the centre of it. You clear your throat, shrinking a bit in embarrassment.

"Sorry," you wince, before going to elaborate on your earlier squawk. "But please don't ever apologise for something like that! I don't know who told you that your animal form is gross, but they can't be all that bright... it was cute."

He looks more like a deer in headlights than the animal he's spliced with right now, eyes wide and staring right at you. You can't help but laugh and tease him, just a little. "Cutest raccoon I ever did see, anyway."

He suddenly comes back to earth, slamming his face into his hands and letting out a long groan. It's from embarrassment, you can tell from the flashes of reddened skin that peek through his fingers. You don't say anything for a moment, letting him return to the conversation on his own terms. Jungkook might be one of the housemates you've interacted with least, but you've heard plenty from the rest of the hybrids in the house.

More often than not, it's about how shy he is and how cute it is when he gets embarrassed. You'd simply nodded and laughed at the time, but now you realise there truly is merit to everything they said.

It takes a few moments of Jungkook muttering into his hands before he pulls his face away, averting his eyes and mumbling softly, "... Thanks. That's really nice of you to say."

"You're welcome," you shrug, smiling when he risks a glance your way to gauge your reaction. Upon seeing nothing that will make him turn tail and flee back into the safety of his room, he eases up, returning his body to it's previous angle towards you.

"So... why were you upset?"

Surprisingly, his question doesn't bother you as you thought it might. You hum, watching as his gaze follows yours to the table, where the letter and the envelope it came in, addressed to you, lay discarded.

"Letter from my dad," you offer in explanation, watching his eyes light in realisation. "Nothing bad, I just miss him so it's... bittersweet."

Jungkook hums, nodding and resting his chin in his hand as he leans forward. "I understand. It's like that with my parents. I know they love me, and I love them, but they're pretty far away and I just... miss them. They're always working."

You're a little surprised that he can relate, although you suppose you really shouldn't be. You don't know very much about Jungkook at all, so it's not fair of you to assume anything about him, even in relation to your own experiences.

"Yeah," you sigh, looking to the sky for a moment as you try and organise your thoughts. "I'm happy he is where he is, doing what he's doing, but I think it's okay to be sad, just for tonight."

Jungkook hums, but doesn't say anything further. It surprises you when he speaks next, the two of you having fallen into a lull.

"Well, you could keep being sad for the night if you want, or... would you maybe wanna see the film I've been working on?"

Your head whips to face him faster than the speed of light, startling him into another jump on the spot.

"Really?" you ask, hurried as though the offer will be rescinded at any moment. "You mean it? I can see it?"

"Yes...?" Jungkook answers, somewhat bewildered. You launch from your chair immediately, rubbing your hands together-- you've heard really good things from the others about his talents in photography and editing, so you've been trying to figure out a way to slip it into conversation for weeks. You've wanted to see them for yourself so badly.

"I'm coming over," you announce, gathering the letter and envelope and already beginning to move towards your room. "I hope your room is clean, Jungkook, or else I'm gonna tease you!"

You'd just meant it as a joke, but the scrambling and hurried footsteps you hear after you say it make you think he took you seriously.

Well, you dad would probably want you to spend the night happy, anyway. You can save being sad for another night.

O -- O -- O

Your time at the house has gone by much faster than you anticipated, and while initially you'd thought that you wouldn't be able to wait to get out, now you find yourself feeling quite the opposite.

You kind of don't want to leave.

At this point, about two months into your stay, you've settled into such a comfortable, stable routine that you struggle to imagine going through the motions in any other way. Often after your early shifts you'll return to the house and catch someone lounging in the sun, and you will no doubt be roped into a short, sweet afternoon nap. On the weekends is group breakfast, and you make sure that you go to bed as early as possible the nights before so that you don't miss it. Taehyung drags you with him of a weekend to fetch fruit and Jimin drags you around the town in general. Some evenings, you find yourself accompanying Namjoon on a walk along the beach, both of you feeling more at peace than ever before when you're standing with feet buried in the sand, watching dusk bleed into twilight and the colours around you stain violet and periwrinkle in the absence of the sun's kiss.

Jungkook knocks on your door at late hours, grinning and eagerly summoning you to his room to watch his latest creation. Seokjin no longer resists your help every other night to make lunches, and has started including you in the schedule as well.

Yoongi and Hoseok are among the busier residents of the house, but you've still spent bits of time with each of them, probably moreso with Hoseok. It's not that you avoid Yoongi or anything like that, it's just that he happens to be the most busy and more often than not is holed up in his room. You don't always see him throughout the week, but he always attends house breakfast on weekends and you're thankful that you get to see him then.

Today, you're spending a little more time with Hoseok. Your shift ended early and you couldn't have thanked your lucky stars any harder, because today the squirrel hybrid had invited you to his dance class. Usually Jungkook or Jimin went with him, both of them enjoying dance as much as their older housemate, but they had both been unavailable today. You'd seen the way Hoseok's face had fallen when they'd told him, and had immediately asked about the class-- you didn't even talk for more than a few minutes before Hoseok was happily inviting you to attend.

It made you a little more pleased than you're going to admit.

You're on your way there now, actually, a skip in your step and a swing in your gait. You've got the tote bag you hold your work things in, and you can hear the rustling of the nuts you'd shoved in there last minute earlier in the day. You'd noticed that Hoseok had forgotten them, so you'd grabbed them to give to him when you saw him. Hopefully he hasn't stuffed himself too full of other foods in the meantime, though from what you've heard apparently he's such a workaholic that he probably hasn't even had lunch yet despite the fact it's currently three in the afternoon.

A majority of Hoseok's classes take place at the school where he teaches, in a room at the end of the drama block that often doubles as a dance classroom when the school gets the funding for it. When you arrive, the door is slightly ajar and upbeat pop is leaking through the gap, Hoseok's sunny voice piercing through the music like a pendulum.

"--and one, two, three, one, two, three-- that's it! That's fantastic! Really good job, guys!"

A smile is already on your face as you push the door open enough to let yourself in, gaze immediately falling upon a group of grinning children that are looking up at Hoseok like they're a tiny field of sunflowers facing their namesake. Hoseok stands before them in a borderline comical pose that only primary school teachers can really pull off, hands on his hips and a proud, beaming smile on his face. You can’t help but blink because for a moment it really was as blinding as looking directly at the sun. He spots you before you can recover fully, and greets you with a wave.

“Ah, perfect! Everyone, this is Miss y/n! She’s going to be sitting in today—I told her how good you all were and she couldn’t wait to see for herself. Let’s all say hello!”

A chorus of greetings is immediately thrown at you, the attention of the little sunflowers now completely on you. Some gasp and run over, grinning brightly at the novelty of a new character, and others watch from afar but seem pleased nonetheless by your presence and alleged eagerness to see them perform.

Before they can launch into conversation with you like you can so clearly see they want to, the ears of some kids ramrod straight and alert and others’ tails flicking in excitement, Hoseok calls them back to where he stands and to your surprise they obey immediately.

“Alright, let’s let Miss y/n get settled down and we can show her what we’ve been practicing, hm? Sound good?”

There is a chorus of ‘yes!’ that pulls a laugh from you as you make your way to the side of the room with the best view and plop down, cross-legged. Eagerly and very self-consciously, now that they have an audience, the small army of children runs to take their place in the formation, and Hoseok pulls his phone from his pocket to pause the song currently playing and pull up the one that matches their routine.

The opening notes filter into the air and Hoseok nods, foot tapping to the beat, before he counts them in and off they go.

Put simply, you’re so incredibly impressed. These kids can dance! You don’t have a doubt that they can dance better than you, not that you ever claimed to have much talent in that department. By the time they finish running through their little routine, you’re clapping and cheering loudly, relishing in the laughter that you’re exaggerated reaction elicits. Hoseok, too, is smiling as he sees how you interact with his students, wandering over after he takes them through it a few more times before giving them a small break.

"So, what do you think?" he asks as he approaches your side of the room, slightly out of breath from doing the routine with them the last few times. "They're so good, aren't they? They've only been working on this for a few weeks and already they have it almost perfectly down-pat. I'm so proud of them."

He slides down the wall next to you, reaching for the bag he'd dropped there presumably before class began; across the room all the students are reaching into their class backpacks for their afternoon snack, and it seems Hoseok has the same idea. You don't even remember the nuts in your bag until he rifles through his for a few minutes, brows furrowed when he comes up empty. His bushy tail flicks dejectedly, ears twitching back on his head, and he pouts.

"Damn, I think I forgot my lunch this morning," he says, and it's enough to jog your memory. You jump in place from the startle of it.

"Oh, I saw that! Here," you quickly reach into your own bag and pull out the nuts and dried fruits, passing it over to him. "I brought it for you, since I figured you'd probably want it at some point."

The way Hoseok's eyes light up when they see the little plastic bag in your hand is almost enough to make you laugh and/or coo out loud. By the skin of your teeth you barely manage to hold that reaction back, but you do smile as he cheers with a short, happy scream and eagerly takes it from your grip.

"My nuts!" Hoseok wastes no time ripping the bag open and grabbing a handful, setting about munching immediately. "You have saved my life today, Miss y/n. I was soooo hungry."

"Didn't get lunch?" you guess, already knowing the answer and having it confirmed when Hoseok nods, completely unfazed by the fact he'd skipped a meal or two.

"I was helping one of the students," he explains, munching happily. His bushy tails curls in content behind him, a sight that makes something happy and warm settle in your chest. "I don't mind missing lunch if it means they get the help they need. I do feel it afterwards, though. Sometimes when I get home I feel so hungry I could eat the whole cupboard out."

A laugh tears from you at his words, the image even funnier because he didn't specify whether he would be doing it in his human form or his animal form. The image of a squirrel wreaking havoc in the house pantry is funnier than you care to admit, but Hoseok just seems happy to have elicited a laugh no matter the magnitude.

It's just a small thing, spending the afternoon with Hoseok and his students, but you find afterwards that it was almost... healing. On the way home, walking besides Hoseok and discussing which dried fruit were the superior dried fruit (he's wrong, and you'll take that opinion with you to the grave), you can't help but feel so light and happy. Like everything is in place, in motion and flowing smoothly. A river without debris and jagged rocks; life right now feels like that moment in nature when water runs over smooth pebbles in a creek, tumbling and pouring but doing so without chaos, and without mess or fallout. Just one continuous, fluid motion.

It feels nice.

You don't even realise until you're laying in bed that night that for a while now, that's how you've been referring to this place.

As home.

O -- O -- O

Aside from the occasional uncomfortable dream, these past few months have been remarkably incident-free, where it concerns the unfortunate topic of your extended family. You'd changed a lot of things when you'd made the decision to move to this island; your phone number, your email addresses and all your passwords, your social media... all of it had been combed through and either switched out or slimmed down. This place is an escape, a place of refuge for you, and that's how you want it to stay.

Unfortunately, the universe isn't always on your side.

It's a rainy afternoon when you receive the call, and you're so fixated on watching the way the rain falls in thin sheets over the ocean that at first from the first floor patio, that you miss it. They don't call again, but a message sets your phone off a minute or so later, and that catches your attention.

Of course, the second you read it and see who it's from, it does more than just catch your attention.

You're not someone prone to many episodes, and you've become adept at self-soothing. But as your eyes begin to stare unfocused at the message and you feel your chest constrict, diaphragm pushing against your lungs, you realise distantly that this is more than you just being momentarily overwhelmed.

You get a bit lost in the moment, lost in the sensation of light-headedness that suddenly washes over you, so much so that when a voice sounds distantly, muffled as though you're listening to someone speak to you from the depths of a pool, you barely even register it at first.

"Hey, y/n, have you seen--"

Still, your eyes are stuck on the message; you don't even notice the way your fingers had begun to tremble while holding the phone until a hand brushes your arm, a figure in front of you blocking the light from beyond the porch.

"y/n, hey, are you.... look at me. y/n, look at me."

Oh, that's a voice, and you do as it says without even a single thought flitting through your head. Looking up, you're barely even as surprised as you should be to see Yoongi standing there, a look of concern spread across his features, brows drawn together as he regards you. You feel a warm touch against your hand, phone tugged from your grip to be replaced with his own. Both your hands are now in his hold and he uses it to ground you, even if just for a moment.

"Can you do me a favour?" Yoongi says, and his voice is so soft and soothing that you find yourself listening as attentively as you can right now. "I need you to breathe with me. I'm gonna count ten breaths, okay? Let's do the first one-- in..."

He inhales deeply, his whole chest moving from the magnitude of it, and you feel as though you're floating in your own head in the moment as you follow suit. Slowly, patiently, he takes you through each breath one at a time, making sure you inhale as big as he does and exhale as long as he does. By the time you reach ten, the light-headed feeling has faded and the constriction in your chest has eased, ever so slightly. As soon as you finish your tenth breath you sag slightly, letting out a gush of air.

"Sorry," you say, slipping one of your hands from his grip to cover your face. "Sorry, I just--"

To your complete and utter surprise, Yoongi's hand lets your other one go and in the next moment you feel arms slipping around your shoulders, bringing you close to his chest and letting your face rest on his shoulder. You see his fluffy tail from where your face is squished, catching glimpses over his shoulder of the way it curls calmly.

Once the moment of shock passes, you're unable to help yourself but to return the embrace, surprised by how much you needed this without even knowing so.

"It's okay, don't apologise," Yoongi says, voice still soft and calm. You sag against him, and your eyes burn not from the message that triggered your almost anxiety-attack, but from the sheer kindness you feel emanating from this man. "Happens to the best of us. Are you feeling a little better?"

You nod, because oddly enough you are, and he slowly releases his hold on you, easing back with an assessing look. Another apology rests on the tip of your tongue but you bite it back, knowing he would refuse it if it ever entered the air.

“I am. Thanks,” you say, eyes looking for your phone as you realise suddenly that it is no longer in your hand where you’d left it. Yoongi holds it up, handing it back easily; his gaze passes over the screen as he does so, and the look he gives you is one of empathy and knowing.

“Shitty family?” he inquires, and you nod, choosing not to look at your phone and to slip it straight into your pocket instead. You go to sit against the wall, facing the edge of the patio, and he joins you.

“I get it,” he says, lifting a hand to fluff up his grey-tinted hair before shifting his gaze out to the rain and its reunion with the ocean. “’Part from my parents, the rest of my… relatives… they’re, uh… they’re not so nice. Didn’t treat me all that well, or even my parents for that matter. So… I get it. You don’t have to elaborate if you don’t wanna, but I get it.”

You don’t really know what to say to that; not that you’re speechless, per se, but moreso that there is simply so much going through your head at once that you can’t seem to settle on anything to voice.

“Thank you,” you say again, sniffling as subtly as you can as you focus on evening your breaths and calming your heart. You feel something on your hand and look over to see Yoongi has placed his palm over your own, his face soft and comforting.

“It’s no problem.”

A different kind of ache, the sort that is tinged around the edges with bittersweet warmth, begins to make itself known amongst the turmoil in your abdomen, and in this moment you can’t quite decipher whether it’s a good feeling or a bad one. What you do know, though, is that you’ve never been more thankful to have had the fortune of meeting these boys and having them make room in their hearts for you, even just a little, than you are right now.

O – O – O

You can’t believe that all the time you’ve spent here has gone so fast, and that currently there is no more than a week before your three month deadline is up and your contracted stay at this house is to come to an end.

If you’re being honest with yourself… you don’t want to go.

When you’d first come to this house, you’d expected that you would have a nice time, but also that you would be eager to move out by the end of the three month period. You had no way of knowing how well you’d fall into routine here, how attached you would become not only to the residents but to the home, the place and the feeling it offers and the way it allows you to feel happier than you have in years.

You know that you have to leave, they’d only agreed to house you for the three months after all, and you also know that they seem to have realised your time here is coming to an end as well. You’ve caught them talking amongst themselves a few times, not quite whispering but definitely conversing about something that halts as soon as they catch wind of you anywhere nearby. You get the sense that they’re unsure how to approach the topic, and you understand since it’s a bit tough for you yourself. You decide to bite the bullet and do it for them, though.

You ask them to meet you in the living area, a week before you leave, to talk. You wanted to just… officially thank them, you suppose. They’ve done a lot for you, in the time you’ve been here, whether they realise it or not. They’ve helped you settle, they’ve shown you that there really is more to life outside the misery your relatives tended to create, and they’ve ensured every second you’ve been with them that you have felt welcomed, and included.

Truthfully, it means more to you than you know how to put into words.

Which is why it’s especially difficult for you to accept that you have to leave.

The expressions on their faces as they gather are a mixture between curious and somewhat apprehensive, with Namjoon, Jungkook and Hoseok bordering on nervous. You wonder why before realising they might not know why you called them here.

“Hey, thanks for gathering,” you say, attempting to keep it light and ensure the smile stays on your face. Of course, they all return is as they take seats across the room, some on the couch and others on the coffee table or the floor. Taehyung’s head tilts, tail curling lightly behind him.

“Um, I just wanted to say something to you—to all of you, while I could. I didn’t think I’d be able to catch everyone in the one room any time but on the weekend,” you muse, smile widening at the round of light laughter your joke elicits. You shift, taking a breath and grounding yourself through the motion of meeting their gazes, one by one.

“I wanted to say thank you,” you begin, voice softer than intended but not so soft that you’re worried their senses won’t pick it up. “Because when I moved here it was to get away, and start anew, and you guys… really gave me that. You’ve made these three months the best and happiest months I’ve had in a long time. I’m so thankful that you let me in, and welcomed me into your home and even into your lives. I don’t think I can word this the way I want to but… really. Thank you, so much. I know I have to leave in a week, but—”

“Oh!”

You halt mid-spiel, wide eyes moving to Taehyung as he suddenly sits up, holding his hands out. “So that’s what you wanted to talk to us about—we actually wanted to talk to you about something, too.”

Freezing, you simply blink, mind coming up blank as to what they could possibly want to talk to you about. Namjoon clears his throat when no one else follows up after Taehyung, averting his eyes before he gathers himself and meeting your confused look. “Well, you probably noticed we’ve been talking amongst ourselves a lot lately—I mean, I know you’ve noticed because you’ve walked in on us a few times, and we’re not very good at being subtle, but—”

“We want to know if you’d like to stay here—permanently.” Taehyung cuts his friend off before he can finish, apparently no longer able to hold the question at bay. There is an expression of pure, unguarded sincerity on his face, excitement lighting in his eyes. “We all talked it out and found that we want you to stay—all of us.”

“You fit,” Yoongi says suddenly, voice still soft but loud enough for you to catch easily. He offers you a gentle smile when you look his way. “We know that if you left, the house wouldn’t be the same after… it would be missing something. You haven’t been here long, but you’re kind of already part of our family so… please don’t go, if you don’t want to.”

Some of the others are pinning Yoongi with a surprised look that you suspect is not directed at what he said, but rather the fact that he said it. You’re too busy biting your lip and trying not to cry like a baby to notice all that much.

“Is that really okay?” you ask, déjà vu washing over you as you think to yourself that again, this sounds too good to be true. “Do you guys really want me to stay?”

Immediately, there is a mixture of nods and loud ‘Yes!’s and ‘Of course!’. You really can’t hold it back, you find, because the sudden flood of warmth and affection washing over your insides is more than you know how to handle. You sniff, unable to reach the tears fast enough to prevent their fall down your face.

“Will you stay?” Yoongi asks, head tilted. Regrettably, his tenderness makes more tears fall.

“Yeah,” you manage, wiping your face furiously, “Yeah, I will. Thank you.”

And that’s all the confirmation you need before your new family is tackling you one by one, replacing your sobs with laughter and making sure you know that from now on, you don’t have to cry alone, you don’t have to be sad alone. They’re here for you.

And it feels so, so nice.

a/n: thank you so much for reading! please let me know what you think and how it made u feel, and let me know u enjoyed it by liking and reblogging! feel free to even just send me an ask screaming! thank u! i love u !

#btsghostie #bts x reader #bts hybrid au #hybrid bts #bts oneshot #bts fic #bts fanfic #ot7 x reader #bts ot7 x reader #seokjin x reader #yoongi x reader #hoseok x reader #namjoon x reader #jimin x reader #taehyung x reader #jungkook x reader #bts fluff #hybrid seokjin #hybrid yoongi #hybrid hoseok #hybrid namjoon #hybrid jimin #hybrid taehyung #hybrid jungkook #hybrid au #my work #sunshine riptide

[study-coffee-chicago]

Seasons of PD: Season 1: Lonnie Rodiger (A Jay Halstead + Halstead! Sister Imagine)

Any quotes from season one that I put in here, credit obviously goes to the writers of PD. For the sake of my story, Ben Corson was killed when he was 11 so you would've been 10. 

Trigger warning for mentions of rape and murder.

Jay's age: 27

Your age: 13

Jay walked up the steps of the front porch of his childhood home. With how crazy gangs have become the past few weeks, it was hard for him to get a good night's sleep without his phone going off, let alone keep track of what day it was. So, when he walked into the district this morning and learned that it was the day of what would've been Ben Corson's fourteenth birthday, he was crushed. He'd learned how to deal with the pain because it wasn't his best friend, it was the little brother of his ex-girlfriend. But, he was your best friend and, despite the saying that time heals all wounds, this day was still hard on you. It was a bit better than when the night he was killed rolled around each year, but it was hard nonetheless. It was also hard because Jay had to see his dad, even if it was just for a few minutes.

"Hey, Jay. How's work?" Pat Halstead asked as his youngest son entered the house. He was seated in the recliner in the living room, catching the highlights of the Blackhawks game from last night.

"Please don't do that," Jay stated.

"Do what?" Pat asked as he muted the tv.

"Pretend like you care. Pretend like you were there for me when I was Y/N's age because we both know you weren't. Remember that fight I got--"

"Jay? Are we going to the Corsons?" you asked, popping into the living room and stopping your dad and Jay's conversation in its tracks.

"Uh, yeah, c'mon let's go," Jay faltered.

You smiled, but it was more of just tipping one side of your lips upward. Today was a day that didn't warrant full smiles, only half-smiles and maybe a few quiet giggles like when you, Jay, Gail, Danny, and occasionally Allie if she was home, told stories about yours and Ben's escapades when you were younger...when Ben was alive.

"Thanks. I made a card, too." You turned to your dad before you left. "Bye, Dad. See you tonight."

"Bye, don't let her eat too much cake, Jay," your dad replied.

"And just for that, you're getting two pieces," Jay whispered in your ear as soon as you were out on the front porch. You rolled your eyes. "Hey, don't use that teenage sass with me, missy."

"Shut up," you joked. "It's just funny because every time Dad tells you not to do something, you do it anyway. It's probably because it's more fun when you're not allowed to do it."

"Okay, fine, I guess you're right about that."

"Ha, you're wrong about something!"

"Technically, I wasn't wrong. I just said you were right. But, do not tell Will."

"No promises."

You walked up the porch steps and Jay rapped on the door of the Corson's. You took a deep breath, trying to forget the many afternoons after school that you'd do the same exact thing, impatiently waiting for Ben to emerge so that you could both play in the backyard together until one of you got called inside for dinner, not without promises to play with each other the next day.

"You okay?" Jay asked, noticing your change in demeanor from joking with him to solemn in a matter of seconds.

You shrugged, not knowing what to say.

"Jay, Y/N," Gail Corson said as she answered the door after you and Jay had each given her a hug.

You walked inside to the kitchen table, where Ben's dad, Danny, was just sitting, staring into space. "Hey, Danny," Jay said.

"Hi, Jay. Y/N," he replied.

You never knew what to say when it came to this day, so you just handed Danny the envelope. "I, uh, I made a card for Ben," you said. "I don't know if you want to open it and read it or just put it somewhere, I just--"

"I'll open it, sweetheart," Gail interrupted and then took the card from her husband.

You had made the card out of light blue construction paper and had used a navy blue pen to write in your best cursive handwriting, Happy 14th birthday, Ben!, since blue was Ben's favorite color. You hadn't known what else to write, because, what else could you write? Tell him what he was missing out on with being gone and cry so hard while making the card that that marker smudged and bled through the other side of the construction paper? No, you couldn't do that. So, you had resorted to printing out some pictures of you and Ben (some with you, Ben, Jay, Allie, and the occasional one with Will) on computer paper, cut them out, and glued them inside the card. You wanted the card to be filled with happy, funny memories, not sad, sappy writing.

Gail let out a sad laugh. "When was this one taken?"

You looked at the picture she was pointing at. It was a selfie no doubt taken on Allie's old flip phone. In it, Jay and Allie were making funny faces and you and Ben were both smiling proudly because of the work you had done.

Jay was supposed to be babysitting you and Allie was supposed to be babysitting Ben since your parents and his parents had gone out for dinner together. You both should have been in bed in your own separate houses since there was a rule about Allie and Jay not hanging out alone together at home when there were no parents around, but you had lost count of how many times they had broken that rule.

It was around 11 at night when Ben had woken you up with two black, Crayola markers in his hand and had told you that both Jay and Allie were asleep on the couch. So, as quiet as you could, you both tip-toed into the living room, uncapped your markers, and got to work.

You knew they had seen the trouble you two had gotten into when you heard running. You and Ben giggled to yourselves as you heard the water running from the bathroom.

Soon enough, Jay flung your door open. And, you guys just couldn't help yourselves and started to laugh even harder.

Then, to get you back, Jay had tickled you and Allie tickled Ben. Once you had all calmed down, Allie suggested that the four of you take a picture. And, the next time Allie and Ben came over when Jay was babysitting, he was sure to hide all the markers on the top shelf of his bookshelf in his bedroom where there was no way either of you would be able to find them, let alone reach them.

"So, you and Allie did hang out together with no parental supervision," Danny chirped. "Don't do stupid things like your brother here, Y/N."

"Hey," Jay started to defend himself. "We learned our lesson...to hide the markers."

"Do you remember when he got in trouble for pushing some kid on the playground, Gail?" Danny asked his wife.

"Oh, how could I forget that! I got a call from the school saying that Ben was in trouble and I knew on my way over there that he'd be grounded from the tv for weeks. But, then in the car on the ride home, he explained to me that some kid in his grade was telling Y/N she couldn't play with them since she was a grade below them. Then, he pushed him down and said that, yes, she could play."

"You never told me the full story of that, Y/N. What's this kid's name?" Jay asked.

"Jay, it was years ago! Give the overprotective big brother thing a rest, would you?"

"Would you kids like some cake?" Gail asked.

You swallowed. Chocolate on chocolate cake, Ben's favorite and yours. But, now on your birthday, you'd switched to marble just so that you wouldn't be reminded of how Ben would never see you on your birthday again.

Jay noticed your discomfort and how you probably didn't want to start bawling your eyes out just because you didn't want Gail and Danny to start crying, as well. Even though they'd probably done enough crying today as it was.

"Actually, we gotta run. I have to get Y/N home because she has homework to do and I have some police business to tend to," Jay answered, sensing your discomfort as the good detective he was.

"At least let me give you a slice to go," Gail suggested.

Abruptly, Danny stood up and shoved his chair under the table, and left the kitchen. You heard a door slam.

You widened your eyes for a split second and then quickly regained your composure. His son was dead and his killer was still on the loose; he had every right to lash out.

"This is always a tough day for him," Gail started. "He won't eat it. I just end up throwing it out."

Jay nodded. "Small slice." He turned to look at you. "And an even bigger slice for her."

Gail went over to a cupboard and pulled out two Tupperware containers and then two plastic forks from a drawer. Then, she cut two slices of cake and placed them inside the containers, handing you the one that contained the bigger slice.

"Thank you," you said.

"Yes, thank you," Jay agreed. "And, if there's anything either you or Danny need, please don't hesitate to call me."

Gail nodded and the two of you left the Corson's house, cake in hand.

"Happy birthday, Ben," you whispered when you were walking down the steps.

Then, when you got back to your house, Jay pulled out his keys and unlocked his car. "Hop in," he told you.

"Where are we going?" you asked. "I thought you had some police stuff to do?"

"You know how on Mom's birthday, we always go to the cemetery and plant flowers?" he asked. You nodded. That day was always full of crying despite how old you got. Hell, even Jay cried. It was one of the only times that he'd let his guard down and let his emotions take over in full force. "Look in the backseat."

There, sitting on the backseat on a towel so that dirt wouldn't get everywhere, was a carton full of Morning Glories. "Blue. Ben's favorite color."

"Yeah," Jay said, the volume of his voice almost a whisper. "We just have to make a quick pitstop first and then we'll go and plant them." You both buckled up and then Jay actually realized that he might have overlooked something. "You don't actually have a ton of homework to get done, do you?"

"No, even if I did, I wouldn't be able to focus on it." You took a bite of the birthday cake. "Does it get any easier?"

"Does what get any easier?" he asked, while still keeping his eyes on the road, his cake forgotten.

"You know, losing people. I know it'll be hard every year for Mom because she was our mom--"

"First of all, she's still our mom, Y/N. No one is going to replace her. Second of all, continue."

"Sorry, I know you got more time with her and knew her better than I did--"

"Listen, if you ever want to hear stories about Mom or Mom and Dad or anything like that, just ask me. I know you were just a kid, hell you are still just a kid, but you can always ask me about her. Always, okay?"

You nodded, feeling grateful that you at least had one brother who looked out for you. Lord knows Will didn't since he was barely home. You didn't hold a grudge against him or anything like Jay did, you just felt like he wasn't there. And, you knew that him not being there had hurt Jay, so it was hard for the three of you to all act like siblings when you felt like you'd need to jump in and stop a fight between your brothers at any moment. If it was just you and Will or just you and Jay, your relationship was great. But, when it was the three of you together, you could practically feel the tension between Will and Jay.

"So, does it get easier? Losing friends I mean. Like, when their birthdays come around or the day they died, does your heart feel like it isn't being ripped out of your chest every second of those days?"

You assumed that Jay had lost friends when he was overseas, which was why he came home from his second tour a year earlier than scheduled. That and your mom was sick.

"That's how you're feeling with Ben? Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"I knew you had your own stuff going on with being a detective and all and I know you think you know who did it and I don't want you going to prison."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. My job will never be more important than you." It might be more important than Will, he thought to himself. But, you didn't need to know that piece of information. "But, to answer your question, no it doesn't get any easier. I mean it kinda does, because the pain of losing them isn't as fresh as the years go by, but the day still sucks no matter how many years it's been."

"Then how do you deal with? When those days of the year roll around?"

"Distract yourself to try and forget. But, pretend I didn't tell you that. Go talk to someone instead."

"That's not what you do though, is it? Talk to someone?"

"Do as I say, kid. Do as I say, not as I do."

"Will you ever stop calling me kid? I'm thirteen, Jay!"

"Nope, in my head you're still that four-year-old with the Build-A-Bear."

He pulled the car up to the curb. You looked up as Jay put it in the park. "Why are we here?"

"Just, stay in the car, okay? I'm gonna be right outside, but I just have something I need to take care of."

"Okay."

You knew this house. You weren't going to tell Jay, but you walked past it every day when going to school because it was shorter than taking the route your parents had taught you to take. Jay was the one who actually taught you to take this route three years ago when he had walked you to school after Ben's death. But, he told you never to take this way to or from school when you were alone. But, seeing as it was five minutes faster and you were a teenager and cherished every second of sleep, you didn't listen and took this way every single school day.

Jay got out of the car and leaned up against it. Then, he opened his container of chocolate on chocolate birthday cake and began to eat it. You knew what he was doing. It was the reason he had taken this route to school with you. He told you it was because it was faster, but you knew it was because he wanted to tail Lonnie Rodiger...which you assumed was the reason why he didn't want you walking here alone. Because a pedophile lived here. Well, technically he wasn't a pedophile yet because he wasn't convicted, but you had heard enough conversations between Jay, Gail, and Danny when they all thought you were out of earshot to know that Lonnie was the one who killed your childhood best friend.

You saw Lonnie peak out through the curtains of one of the windows. And, if it weren't for Jay's water bottle that was sitting in the cupholder that you quickly took a swig of, you would've choked on your bite of cake.

A patrol car pulled up across the street and a uniformed cop came out. It was the same kind of uniform that Jay had been wearing the night you ran over to the Corson's house when it became a crime scene. You quickly wiped the few tears away at the memory of that night. If Jay got arrested, you knew you'd have to go with him because you couldn't drive. And, you didn't want to be crying in the back of a cop car while Jay was trying to talk his way out of an arrest.

Jay resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Of course, they called the cops! Of course, they did! They'd call the cops and arrest him for harassing a pedophile and a killer, but they wouldn't arrest Lonnie for being a pedophile and a killer.

"Can I see your driver's license?" the patrolman asked.

Jay lifted his shirt, revealing his badge and gun. Despite being off duty, he had it. He always had it when he came around the Rodiger house. If Lonnie struck first, then he'd have him on assaulting an officer...and have an excuse to kill the son of a bitch. It would be in self-defense after all. He feared serious bodily harm.

But, of course, that wasn't going to happen, not today anyway.

"Halstead. Intelligence," Jay answered.

"This is harassment!" Phil Rodiger yelled as marched outside and pointed at Jay, Lonnie right behind him.

"Just eating some birthday cake," Jay said, poking the cake with his plastic fork. "Today would've been a birthday."

You felt your lip begin to tremble.

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, you kept telling yourself.

But, it was no use. It was just those three words: would have been.

It would have been Ben's fourteenth birthday if he was still here and if he wasn't buried in the ground in the cemetery, a high collared shirt on to hide the strangulation marks that Lonnie gave him when he wrapped a rope around his neck and pulled, choking him to death.

If he were still here, he would've had a birthday party. It might have been small with only a few people. You might not even have been invited because you're in middle school and middle schoolers like to talk. And, maybe, if you had been invited, people would have said that he had a crush on you and teased him about it.

Maybe, the early stages of puberty would have hit Ben by now and he would have become what you deemed to be cute. Maybe, he would've had a crush on you and you would've had a crush on him if he was still around. But, he would forever be stuck in your head as your best friend, no romantic feelings whatsoever, since he only lived to be eleven years old.

"Arrest him!" Phil Rodiger yelled, snapping you out of your thoughts. "Get him out of here!"

This was it. Maybe the patrolman wouldn't notice you were in the car and you could sneak back home in a few minutes and call Erin, get her to talk to Voight about getting your brother out of lockup. (Yes, you had Erin's number because you needed questions answered that would make your dad and Jay uncomfortable. Even though Will was a doctor, there was no way you would ask him about girl stuff, even though you were pretty sure he had heard and seen it all in New York.)

"Sorry, pal," the patrolman said.

Okay, so you wouldn't be dragged into the back of a patrol car and also wouldn't have to help Jay beat a charge. Thank god your brother was a part of Chicago's famous Intelligence Unit.

You set your cake on the dashboard. You couldn't take it anymore. If Jay wasn't going to say it, you would.

Jay heard the passenger side door open and whipped his head around. "Y/N," he warned. "Get back in the car."

"He killed my best friend, Jay!" you yelled, tears running down your cheeks. "What do you want me to do? Sit in the car and watch him just get away with it?"

The patrolman's eyes grew wide. Seeing that made you realize what you had just said.

You just accused Lonnie of murder.

"Y/N!" Jay yelled. You looked up to see that he had thrown his cake on the ground. "Get back in the car!"

Okay, so Jay's scary when he's angry, noted.

You made your way around the car and into the passenger seat. Then, you just watched as Jay talked to the patrolman, trying to sort this all out.

You didn't mean to do it. It just came out.

You fucked up. Maybe you were going to be the one arrested this time. And, since you weren't a cop, there'd be no way to easily get out of those handcuffs.

You put your head in your hands and changed the radio station, trying your best to make sure you didn't hear the conversation between Jay and the patrolman.

Soon, the patrolman sped off. You were safe. But, Lonnie and Phil were still standing across the street, outside, watching Jay, watching you.

"Get outta here!" Phil yelled.

Jay was almost to the car when he turned around, rage painted on his freckled face. "Three years ago today, Lonnie! Three years! He would've been fourteen! Fourteen!"

"I'm gonna call my lawyer! I'm getting a restraining order!" Phil promised.

"Yeah? Well, I'm gonna give you a reason to need one someday! You and your sick-ass son!"

He slammed the door shut, but you didn't look at him, just kept your gaze on the world outside the passenger side. Jay turned the key and his car roared to life. You heard him sigh, but didn't say a word.

"Look, I'm sorry," he began as he started driving.

"So you get to confront him but when I try it's all get back in the car, Y/N?" you quoted his words from earlier using a mocking tone.

"Lonnie's fu- he's messed up in the head, okay? I don't want him to have any reason to come after you. We both know what he did to Ben and I wish we could nail him on that, but right now, with the evidence that there is, it just can't happen. I'm sorry, I just wanted to keep you safe. I couldn't live with myself if that psycho did anything to you."

"I guess you have a point."

"I always have a point."

Ten minutes later you pulled up to the cemetery. Jay grabbed the small bag of tools and you carried the flowers, not without being warned every thirty seconds not to tip them at all so that they didn't fall out. It was the same thing as when you'd plant them at your mom's grave: you'd always be the one to carry the flowers, but they'd always warn you to be careful with them and then say that you weren't carrying them next year...and then they'd forget they'd said that and the process would repeat itself.

"I'll dig up the first bit of dirt and then you can help me. The top part's always the hardest," Jay said once you had made it to Ben's grave and he started rummaging through the tools.

"Okay." You didn't know what else to say. You just stared at the headstone. You wished he'd just come back to as a ghost or spirit or something for a minute--literally just sixty seconds--so that he could tell you that Lonnie did it.

Twenty minutes later, you and Jay stood up and admired your work. There were flowers there already from the Corson family, but the blue gave even more color to the normally dismal place.

"I'm gonna go find a trash can," Jay said as he picked up the empty plastic pots that the flowers came in. "Give you some time alone."

You nodded, not knowing what to say. Even when Jay left you had no idea what to say. It had been three years, so you didn't feel like you needed to talk to Ben. After all, if he was in heaven, he was looking down on you and knew what was going on in your life, so there was no reason to tell him about it. And, he was a kid, so he had to have gone to heaven, right?

"I'm sorry," you whispered. "I'm so, so sorry."

You heard thunder rumble from above, which drowned out the sound of your choked sobs. The grass beside you started to get wet from the drizzle that had just started, but by how many seconds there were between each clap of thunder, you knew a downpour was just a matter of minutes away.

So many things could have gone differently that night. If Ben had come over to your house to spend the night, he'd still be here. You knew you couldn't change anything. Hell, you didn't even talk about having a sleepover that night, that week, or even that weekend. And, the night he was murdered was a school night, so your dad wouldn't have let Ben spend the night anyway. There was nothing you could have done.

Despite how many years passed, you wondered if you wouldn't have fallen asleep so fast that night if you would have been able to hear screams and called 911 for help. Maybe he'd still be alive if you couldn't fall asleep that night. Maybe, if Jay was off-duty that day and if there was a Blackhawks game on that night, he would've come over and you would've insisted on staying up late and ended up falling asleep on the couch. But, because of Jay being very observant, maybe he would've seen something, heard something, or even just felt that something was very wrong and could've stopped it and arrested Lonnie before it ended tragically.

You felt something wrap around your arms and looked up to see that Jay was back. You felt goosebumps on your body and that's when you realized your hair was sopping wet and water was dripping down the side of your face and was soaking your jeans and shirt.

You heard the pitter-patter of raindrops hitting the large umbrella that Jay usually stowed in his trunk and pulled Jay's jean jacket that he just laid over your shoulders tighter around yourself.

He picked up his tools and turned to you. "You ready? Can't have you getting sick."

"How long have I just been crouched here?" you asked. You knew your thoughts sometimes got the best of you and before you knew it, an hour could've passed when your mind was focused on one subject.

"Until I thought you were going to freeze to death and get sick. And, it's only been about fifteen minutes. I ran to the bathroom and then grabbed the umbrella out of the car. You ready?" he repeated.

You wiped your eyes, not knowing if it was dried tears or dried raindrops on your cheeks. "Uh, yeah."

Jay picked up the bag of tools and you walked back to the car, the umbrella being big enough for both of you to fit underneath.

Once in the car, you slipped off Jay's jean jacket and tried to hand it back to him. "No, at least wear it until we get home. Dad'll kill me if he sees that you're sopping wet and then he'll think that I just left you out in the rain."

"Brother of the year." And, despite the circumstances, both of you laughed.

***

Math homework is due tomorrow...why does math have letters anyway? I'm never gonna need this in life. Snap out of it, Y/N. You can focus on that later. Just focus on the walk home. You have to be careful now since you're walking by their house.

You tried to turn your attention to the world ahead of you, or more accurately, the road and houses in front of you. You needed to be on high alert since you were about to walk past the Rodiger house. And, they saw you now...hopefully, they hadn't filed a restraining order against you, too. As far as you knew, it was just Jay, but you didn't need to have Jay get you out of trouble today.

Your eyes darted across the street to the house, while you tried to make sure you didn't cast your glance there too long as to be suspicious. It was Jay's job to be suspicious while walking past this house. It was your job to get to and from school safely when walking past this house. You'd leave the detective/spying/surveillance stuff to Jay.

You tried to focus on the road straight ahead of you, but it was no use when you saw movement out of the left side of your peripheral vision.

You turned and gasped. They turned too, and now you were frozen in place.

He widened his creepy eyes and stared back at you, like a deer caught in the headlights, like a criminal caught in the act because right now, that's what you assumed he was.

You felt your breath catch in your throat, neither of you breaking eye contact.

Then, you took off running. No way in hell were you telling your dad what just happened. One time he caught you walking home this way and said if he found out that you walked to or from school this way again that you'd be grounded for an undisclosed amount of time.

No one needed to know that you had just seen Lonnie Rodiger with duct tape and rope, the two things everyone assumed he had used to kill Ben Corson. No one needed to know. Just shut your mouth and don't tell anyone and everything would be fine. You would be fine.

***

Jay was sitting across from Antonio at Molly's, slowly sipping on the bit of whiskey left in his glass. "You knew the family?" Antonio asked him.

"He's the younger brother of a girl I dated in high school. Was Y/N's best friend, too. And his parents, Danny and Gail, they came to my graduation from the academy." When my dad wouldn't because he hates all my life choices. Probably hates me, too, Jay wanted to add but stopped himself. "I still see 'em on what would be Ben's birthday. Y/N comes too and god, you know what she asked me this year, Antonio?" Antonio shook his head. "She asked me if their birthdays or the day they died gets easier when it rolls around every year. She's thirteen! She shouldn't have to remember his birthday. Ben should be alive and Y/N should be seeing him on his birthday. But now all she probably remembers on his birthday is seeing his lifeless body lying in the grass...that's probably what she remembers." He took another sip of whiskey.

"Wait, you're saying your little sister saw the body at the crime scene?" Antonio asked.

"Uh, yeah. Me and my partner were first on scene. And...I see a shoe. I push the reeds back because Gail used to have this huge garden with really nice grass, reeds, flowers, other things. And, now she doesn't because it reminds her too much of that night.

"But uh, anyway, I pushed those reeds back..." He swallowed and tried to keep the tears at bay. He couldn't cry. Not in front of his mentor; not in front of the detective who got him into Intelligence in the first place, even if it was only because he caught a bullet in the process of trying to help Gabby and everyone's favorite after-shift hangout spot, Molly's. "And there he is. I still see his face."

Antonio took a swig of his beer. "How'd your sister find him?"

"My dad told me later that she had heard and seen the sirens and went to wake him up and then they came over to see what was going on. She was only nine, hell, she even had her teddy bear with her when they came outside. She was small and easy to miss. Before anyone could stop her...she, uh, she ducked under the crime scene tape and she saw him. I will never forget how she screamed out Ben's name.

"Then, I ran over to her and tried to block him from view, but you know as well as I do, Antonio, that seeing a body like that, well the damage is already done. So, then I just took her home and my partner explained the situation to my sergeant so that I didn't get in trouble for just leaving a crime scene. I never told her about the rape, just that he was dead. She probably put the pieces together that he was raped since she's gotten older, but I didn't heave the heart to tell her."

Antonio nodded. If he was in the same position as Jay was and Gabby was in your position, he knew he'd do the same exact thing. "I remember his dad alibied him out," Antonio stated. "But, they never had anything on Lonnie. Nothing?"

"No," Jay scoffed. "They caught him jerkin' it outside an elementary school a week prior to finding Ben. They found fucking kiddie porn on his computer. A-And secret pictures that he'd taken of Ben."

"You gotta be kidding me."

"Nuh-uh. We all knew Lonnie did it. But, you know, his dad lied." Jay shrugged. "And, uh, they got a good lawyer for that sick of a bitch."

Jay took a sip of his whiskey, blinking back tears. Antonio sighed and looked at the young detective. "Hey, be careful. You hear me?"

"I know, I just--" Jay was cut off by his phone ringing. He looked at it. Why's Dad calling at 11 o'clock at night? Why is Dad calling me at all?

He declined the call.

"Who was that?" Antonio asked.

"Not important. Anyway, I'll be care--" His phone started ringing again. "Dammit," he muttered and then pressed the answer icon. "Yeah?"

"J-Jay?"

"Y/N? What are you still doing up? Don't you have school tomorrow?"

"I didn't want to tell you because you and Dad always tell me not to walk there by myself, but I saw him and he saw me and I thought I'd be fine but now I can't sleep and--"

"Whoa, whoa. Take a breath, okay?"

You took a deep, shaky breath as few tears slipped down your face. You tried not to think about your encounter with Lonnie earlier today, but as you tried to sleep and the darkness took over the world, you couldn't stop your thoughts from running rampant. What if he was going to use that duct tape and rope on you now because he had seen you? Kill all the witnesses so that there wouldn't be a trial and he wouldn't get convicted?

"Now, tell me again what happened," Jay said calmly, all his cop instincts taking over and talking to as if you were a victim for the time being. "This time slower."

"I took the way home from school that you taught me to take and tell me to never take alone--"

"Y/N," Jay wiped a hand over his face. "Me and Dad told you not to go that way by yourself."

"I know, but I saw Lonnie and he had supplies and he saw me. I thought it was fine but now I can't sleep and--"

"Y/N," Jay started again. "Slow. Down. You saw Lonnie?"

At the mention of that name, Antonio looked up.

"Yeah," you answered, trying to slow your rate of speaking. "He had- he had rope and duct tape. And- and he saw me. I'm scared. I'm so scared, Jay. What if he comes after me now?" You covered your mouth with your hand to stop your dad from hearing your sobs. You assumed he was sleeping, and if he wasn't you hoped he didn't notice that you were on the phone. All he had to do was pick it up and see line in use and then you'd be in trouble for walking that way.

"Y/N, listen to me. I'm not gonna let that happen. I'm gonna leave Molly's right now and then be over there. Are you in your room?"

"Yeah."

"Is Dad still up?" Jay asked.

"I-I don't know."

"Okay, just stay put and I'll be there as soon as I can. And, we can explain it to Dad together, alright?"

"Okay. You promise you'll be here soon?"

"I promise. I'm leaving Molly's right now."

"Okay."

"I'm gonna hang up now."

"Okay, bye Jay."

Jay ended the call and started putting on his jacket. "What was that all about?" Antonio asked.

"Y/N took the fastest route home from school today, which goes by the Rodiger place. She said she saw Lonnie and he had duct tape and rope with him. He saw her, Antonio."

"Shit." Antonio pulled out his wallet and threw a few bills on the table. "I got it. I'll be right behind you."

"Thanks, man."

***

Jay slowly turned the key in the lock and opened the door, Antonio following him. "Dad?" Jay asked.

"Jay?" he answered from the living room, sounding as if he had just woken up from falling asleep in front of the tv. "What are you doing here?"

"I can explain if you wanna go check on Y/N, Jay," Antonio suggested.

"Yeah, yeah that'd be great. Thanks, man."

You heard knocking at your door, causing you to draw in a deep breath. "Y/N? Open up, it's Jay."

You set Beary down--yes when you were scared you still liked to have your Build-A-Bear in your hand because it gave you comfort--and then stood up from your bed to open the door.

"Jay." You launched yourself into his arms before he could even comprehend what was happening. "I'm so scared. What if he comes after me?"

Jay wrapped his arms around you and ran his hand up and down your back, just like he had done a few years ago when he had brought you back home after you had seen Ben's lifeless body lying in the grass. "Shhh, shhh it's okay. You're okay." Now he was most definitely using the tone he used when talking to child victims.

"What if he- what if he comes after me though, Jay?" you asked, soaking his shirt with tears of fright.

"Hey," he pulled away. "Look at me." You looked up at your older brother. "I will not let that happen. Ever. You understand me?" You nodded. "Now, how about you pack a bag, and then you can stay at my place until this all blows over."

"Why?"

Jay sighed. "Just, please do it."

You pulled out a peach-colored duffle from your closet.

"I'll be right downstairs if you need me."

He walked downstairs to see your dad still sitting on the living room couch with Antonio sitting in the chair across from him. "I'm taking Y/N to my place for a few days until this whole thing gets sorted out," Jay announced.

"She was walking that way because you taught her how to take it!" Pat Halstead bellowed as he stood up off the couch and pointed an accusing finger at his youngest son. "If you had never walked that way when you took her to school, then we would never be in this position!"

"We?" Jay asked rhetorically. "I don't recall Y/N telling me that you were with her when she saw that sick son of bitch walking home with his weapons of choice! It's Y/N that's in this position! Not me, not you, not us, Y/N."

"She's my daughter!"

"Yeah, I gathered that," Jay scoffed. "At least you care about her...unlike how you weren't there for me and Will. Or, if my memory serves me correctly, it was when I was in my early teens when you stopped caring. So, I expect in the next two years that you'll stop taking good care of Y/N and stop showing up to her games, like you did for me and Will. Oh, and you'll start questioning her life choices, just like you did almost every damn day to both me and Will."

"It's not my fault that you made a stupid decision with your life and Will decided to leave and waste all his money and to do what? To go to Sudan and then to New York?"

"There you go again, same old same old. You want us to be here, but whenever we are, we just end up fighting."

"Okay, okay," Antonio butted in. "How about we all take a breath and then talk about what's gonna happen next."

Jay took a deep breath and rolled his eyes. Your dad sat back down on the couch and crossed his arms in front of him.

"Good," Antonio began. "Y/N give you anything else about what she saw upstairs other than what she told you over the phone?"

"No," Jay answered. "She just told me that she's really scared that Lonnie's gonna come after her. Noting more about what she saw."

"Jay?" you asked as you poked your head into the living room, duffle bag slung over your shoulder. "I'm ready."

You said goodbye to your dad and then followed Jay to your car. He explained that Antonio was going to come to his apartment just for a little while so that they could discuss how they were going to proceed with the information you had given them. But, that you should go to sleep when you got to his apartment because it was a school night.

"Do I have to go to school tomorrow?" you whined as you set your bag down next to the couch...which would also be your bed until all this was cleared up.

"I know you're not going to get a lot of sleep, but yeah, as much as it sucks, you have to go to school tomorrow."

It was nearing 12:30 and you had to be up for school at 6:00 since school started before 7:30 in the morning. You'd be lucky if you managed five hours of sleep.

"Please, Jay," you begged. "My first two classes are just choir and gym, so I can miss those. And, I'm pretty sure if you called me in it'd count as an excused absence. Please?"

"Fine," Jay conceded. "But just because I think it's stupid how early school starts."

You heard a knock on the door. "Be right there, Antonio!" Jay said, trying to keep his yelling voice at somewhat of a normal level since people in the other apartments were sleeping.

"I'm gonna go grab a blanket," you told Jay.

You grabbed a blanket and threw it on the couch as Jay went to answer the door and let Antonio inside.

"Jay, I'm stealing one of your pillows," you told him as you entered his bedroom area.

"Actually, you can take my bed for tonight," he suggested.

You cocked an eyebrow at him. In all the nights you had spent at Jay's apartment in the past few years when your dad had to work late or went out, you had always slept on that couch. And, it was because it was actually comfortable. (Jay's reasoning was that he didn't want to get one of his nightmares that happened a handful of times per year and break his hand from hitting the coffee table in his sleep because he was thinking that it was an enemy because he thought he was back in Afghanistan. But, of course, you didn't know that.)

"It's just because I need to talk to Antonio and I don't need you having easy access to the conversation."

You nodded, tiredness overtaking you. "Alright." You yawned. "I'm going to bed. 'Night guys."

Jay and Antonio both said goodnight and then you walked into Jay's bedroom area and slid the sliding doors closed. During that time, the two detectives each took a seat at the kitchen table.

"We can put a patrol car out in front of Lonnie's house," Jay suggested.

"You know we can't do that," Antonio told him.

"Well, why not? You know he's gonna kill again!" Jay resisted the urge to slam his fist down on the table.

"You have no solid proof. I know you believe Y/N, and I do, too, but we don't have proof. If we had cam or pod footage, we might be able to do that. But, as far as we know, we don't have that. Nothing's been reported or called in. Hell, for all we know Lonnie's doing a DIY project."

"So get his credit card records and security footage from the store," Jay growled.

"You know as well as I do Halstead, that we can't do that without a warrant. And for a warrant, we're gonna need sufficient evidence. And, the word of your sister just isn't gonna cut it this time. Sorry, man."

Jay sighed and put his head in his hands, then looked back up at Antonio. "I just can't let him do it. I can't let him kill another kid."

"I know. Believe me, neither you nor me want that, but for now, we just need to wait until the right time. And you, need to get some sleep."

"I guess you're right. Maybe sleep would help me figure out how to solve this thing."

***

Jay had just dropped you off at school--he had called the school and excused your absences from your first two classes--and was walking out of a small coffee shop a few blocks away from the district when his phone rang.

"What do you got, Jin?" Jay asked. Benefits of working in Intelligence and having a tech guy for the unit: getting him to dig into things under the table.

"That Lonnie Rodiger credit card you wanted me to track," Jin started on the other end of the line, "Just got a hit from a toy store downtown."

"Text me the address."

A few seconds later, Jin had texted Jay the address and he jumped in his car and made his way into the heart of downtown Chicago.

Then, he sat in his car and stared at the store, waiting for the scrawny, creepy-ass pedophile slash murderer to make his way out of it.

When Lonnie walked out, Jay just stared at him. If he got made, so what? He was in his car. He could say he was doing surveillance for another case that he couldn't talk about right now because it was an open investigation. But, he wouldn't be able to blame surveillance of an ongoing investigation for strangling Lonnie to death, killing him the exact same way as he had killed Ben Corson three years ago.

Lonnie was carrying a bag full of what Jay assumed were toys. The toys, the rope, the duct tape, Lonnie was going to strike again. And, Jay had to act fast to ensure that another kid didn't get their life taken away just because this bastard had sick, twisted fantasies.

Jay was about to call Jin back, see what else he could pull up on him, anything that gave him an excuse to call Atwater and Burgess to arrest him. But, his phone rang.

"Go for Jay," he answered.

"Where you at?" Voight asked on the other end of the line. "I know you came in late because of your sister, but I need you now."

"I'm on my way in," he lied.

"Good. We're in Chinatown. I'll send you the address."

"Oh, Sarge?"

"Yes, Halstead?"

"Do you mind if I leave for a bit around 2:15ish? It's just, Y/N has a doctor's appointment and my dad's working and I don't want her taking the bus--"

"Jay," Voight interrupted, "Take your sister to her appointment. I'll just send the address of where we're gonna be if we aren't at the district. Just, keep your phone on."

"Thanks, Sarge."

Of course, that appointment was a lie; Jay just wanted to pick you up from school and then drop you off at his apartment while he went back to work so that you wouldn't be at home where Lonnie could find you. But, Jay had to push that out of his mind right now because he was on another case with his unit that needed solving, his side case on Lonnie Rodiger needed to be put on the backburner...at least for the next few hours.

***

"Lonnie Rodiger's credit card," Jin said as Jay entered the tech room.

"Yeah, I know, I'm working on a court order so I don't get my ass handed to me by Voight, I know," Jay replied.

"Okay...you deal with that. All I was gonna say was that another hit came up from his card at a Home Depot in Humboldt Park. He bought..." Jin clicked some keys on his computer until the list of things Lonnie purchased popped up. "A two-person tent, a kerosene lamp, and some bug spray. A rapist-murderer planning a camping trip? Not much you can get him on with just that."

"Any chance he purchased rope and duct tape?" Jay asked.

Jin scrolled through the list of items again. "Not that I see here. Why?"

"Not important. Thanks for the help, Jin."

Jay walked back into the bullpen, about to grab his jacket and head into the locker room when Voight emerged from his office at the same time. "Halstead, my office."

"I told you to let the Rodiger thing go months ago," Voight told Jay when the door was securely shut.

"I have...for the most part." I have...until my sister got involved and told me he bought duct tape and rope and now she's staying at my place so that I can protect her from that sick-ass son of a bitch.

"If you're not straight with me, I can't protect you."

"You? Protect me? I don't need protecting, Sarge, but thanks for the offer. I'll keep it in mind if I  ever go off the rails and kill someone."

"Jay, listen to me! What the hell is going on with you? You got here later than usual today, which I know you said is because of your sister, but you look exhausted like you haven't slept in days. And don't think I didn't notice that you've been constantly checking your phone when we weren't out in the field."

Jay sighed. "I think Lonnie's gonna kill another kid."

"Jay, I know that kid's family was like your own. But, you gotta be careful. You've got eyes on you. And, it's not just me this time."

"Copy that." Then, Jay exited his sergeant's office, grabbed his jacket off his chair, and headed to the locker room. Damn, did he really want to go home after that conversation with his boss.

"You headin' to Molly's, Jay?" Adam asked as they grabbed their stuff from the locker room.

"Nah, man. I got some stuff I gotta take care of," Jay replied. "Maybe another night."

"If you say so."

***

You were sitting on the couch reading a book when you heard a knock at Jay's apartment door. "Y/N, it's Jay, open up."

You got up and unlocked the door, letting him into his own apartment. "Why didn't you just unlock it yourself? Or, did I get your only key?

"Nope, you got my spare. I have mine." He pulled his keyring out of the front pocket of his jeans and set it down on the counter. "Just didn't want to scare you is all."

"Thanks, greatly appreciated. What are you hiding behind your back? And what smells so good?" you asked, seeing as Jay hadn't moved his left hand from behind his back and was trying really hard to make sure you didn't see what was there. Even when he had walked inside the apartment from the hallway, he still somehow hid it behind his back and out of your view. And, the smell of greasy food was starting to waft around the apartment so you had a pretty good idea what he was hiding.

He pulled a takeout bag from behind his back. "I got us Arby's!"

"Really? Did you get me mozzarella sticks?" you asked trying to grab the bag from him, but he held it out of your reach.

Jay chuckled at your excitement. "Yes, I got you mozzarella sticks. Now, let me get this out of the bag and you can get the game set up?"

"Okay!" You sat on the couch and turned on the Blackhawks game that was going to start in five minutes. "It's ready!"

"Be right there!"

A minute later, Jay passed you a plate which contained an original roast beef and cheddar sandwich and of course, your precious mozzarella sticks and a few packs of Arby's and marinara sauce.

"Uh," Jay groaned as he lowered himself onto the couch.

"You're getting old," you laughed.

"I am not!" he protested.

"Yes, you are! Only old people sigh like that when they go to sit down!"

"Well, excuse me for having to chase psychos around the city for a living." You reached over and grabbed a few curly fries off his plate, hoping he was distracted enough by your old Jay comment that he didn't notice...he did. "Hey!"

"Oops." You squirted some Arby's sauce on your plate and dipped a curly fry in it. "Good." Jay just continued to stare at you. "Fine, here," you said as you handed him a mozzarella stick.

"You're not gonna offer me any marinara?"

You tossed him a pack. "Better?"

"Better." Both he and you turned your attention to the tv. "Remember, end of the second period, it's bedtime."

"Jay," you whined. "Please can I stay up and watch the entire game?"

"No, because I am not calling you in late tomorrow and getting to work later than usual because of it." Luckily today we didn't catch a case until around 10 o'clock this morning, so it didn't matter that I was late and tailing Lonnie anyway. "And, you're gonna be a grouch if you don't enough sleep."

"Jay! I am not grouchy!"

"Yes, Y/N, you are! Whoa, a fight!" And while your attention was quickly focused on the tv, Jay stole some of his curly fries back.

***

Jay walked into the district the next morning to be met with Erin and Alvin. "Did you guys catch the game last night?" he asked them as he slipped off his jacket and slung it over his desk chair. "Eighteen seconds into overtime, Kane scores a backhander. Guy's on fire this season."

Despite Jay telling you that you needed to go to bed after the end of the second period, the game was so good that he let you stay up to watch it all...the one caveat being that you had to get up in the morning with no complaint. And, you didn't complain one single time even though you almost fell asleep with your toothbrush hanging out of your mouth when you were getting ready this morning.

Neither Erin nor Alvin had said anything, they just stared at Jay with worried looks on both their faces. "What's with you two?" Jay furrowed his eyebrows and walked closer to them.

"Halstead," Voight said after he opened his office door.

Jay's eyes widened. Shit, what'd I do now?

"Commander," Jay said as he saw Commander Perry standing in Voight's office. So, even when I'm a grown man, there's still a version of the principal's office. Who knew? Except, this principal controls my job...which means he controls my money. Whatever he thinks I did, it wasn't me.

"Halstead. Have a seat," Commander Perry told the detective.

"I'll stand." Jay placed his hands on his hips.

"Okay then. Where were you last night after shift?"

"Home. Why?"

"So, you're telling me you didn't go out at all last night?"

"I started to drive home from work, but then I turned around because I thought my little sister might want Arby's for dinner. If you want to count a drive-thru as going out, then yes I went out."

"And after that?" Commander Perry prodded.

"Me and my sister watched the Hawks game and I was in bed by midnight."

Commander Perry picked up some black and white photos that were taken from traffic cam footage and held them out to Jay, pointing at specific a specific car. "This was taken last night, right as you pulled into that Arby's. That's Rodiger and that's you, right behind him."

"Okay, so I happened to be getting my takeout behind a pedophile. Maybe he just wanted some curly fries, Lord knows Y/N did when she stole some of mine last night."

"Halstead!" Voight barked. "This isn't a laughing matter! Now shut up and listen!"

Jay clasped his hands behind his back.

"Well, Detective, your alleged pedophile was found dead this morning."

"What?"

"So until this is straightened out, I suggest you find a better excuse than just watching a hockey game and eating fries with your impressionable little sister. Until then, you are officially stripped. Expect a call from Internal Affairs. They'll want to interview you as soon as possible."

"You mean they'll want to interrogate me as soon as possible."

"Jay!" Voight's voice boomed off the walls of the small office.

"I'm the one who wanted to stop that freak! And now I'm the target? Unbelievable!"

Jay flung open the door and was about to storm out when the Commander stopped him. "Halstead!"

"What? I tried to save my sister from this psycho because she saw him buy duct tape and rope and he knows that she saw him! So, excuse me for trying to make sure that my sister stays safe and doesn't end up like Ben Corson!"

"Y/N saw something?" Voight asked. "Why didn't you tell me? I could've helped you."

"I told Antonio, but that's only because we were at Molly's when Y/N called me freaking out. And that's why she's staying with me because Lonnie knows where we live and I didn't want to get a call saying that my sister was murdered and--"

"Halstead, if that's the truth then this isn't just based on your word. We have a witness now. So, I'll talk to Detective Dawson and you go pick up your sister from school. We need her here for questioning. But, you are still stripped until we get this all sorted out."

***

"Can you please send Y/N Halstead to the office please?" the office secretary's voice came over your classroom intercom. "She'll be leaving for the rest of the day."

You furrowed your eyebrows. Leaving for the rest of the day? What? The last time you had to leave for the rest of the day unexpectedly was when your mom died.

"I'll send her down," your teacher replied.

"Alright, thank you." Then, she turned to you. "I'll have your missed work ready for you on Monday, Y/N, and I can email the other teachers you have today that you'll be missing their classes as well if you'd like?"

"That'd be great. Thank you."

"Have a great weekend, Y/N."

"Thank you. You too."

Then, you grabbed your books and made your way to your locker. Once you put everything you needed into your backpack, you made your way to the office. At least you were missing math and science class...you hated both of those subjects. Will got the brains when it came to those two.

But, your relief was short-lived when you saw Kim Burgess and Kevin Atwater standing in the office. You frantically pulled the door open. "Did something happen to Jay? Is he okay? Did he get hurt?"

"No, no, nothing like that," Kim quickly reassured you. "We just need to bring you down to the district is all."

"Why?" you asked, drawing out the word.

"It's better if your brother and Voight explain this to you. But, you are not in any trouble, Jay's not in any trouble, and he's fine," Kevin answered.

"Okay..."

They quickly signed you out and the three of you made your way to the parking lot where their squad car was parked. "Ever been in a patrol car, Y/N?" Kevin asked.

"No," you answered, opening the door to the backseat and throwing your backpack in.

"Well, today's your lucky day. We'll even let you control the music." The three of you got in and Kevin turned on the car and started fiddling with the controls on the radio. "Just tell me to stop when you hear a song you like."

***

"Jay!" you yelled as you ran up the stairs to Intelligence, your backpack bouncing up and down with every step you took. Jay walked out of the break room. You ran to him, narrowly missing Commander Perry. "What's going on? I didn't know I'd need to leave school and then Kim and Kevin came to pick me up and I thought you might be hurt but they said you weren't and--"

"Whoa, whoa," Jay cut you off. "Y/N, slow down. I'm okay. Everything's okay. Voight and Commander Perry here just need to ask you a couple of questions."

"But, I didn't do anything wrong."

"You're not in trouble, kid," Voight said. "Like your brother said, we just need to ask you a few questions and Jay will be with you the whole time."

Since neither Jay nor Voight could get ahold of your dad to get permission to talk to you, they had allowed Jay to sign off on it. And, since you were a minor, the person who signed that paperwork had to be in the room with you the entire time they were talking to you.

"You hungry?" Commander Perry asked as you sat down and Jay stood behind you. "You can grab a snack from the vending machine before we start if you'd like."

It was only 9:00 am. "No thank you," you replied. "I had breakfast a few hours ago and I'm still full from that. Thank you, though."

"You're welcome." He and Voight sat down across from you. "Now, you're probably wondering why you're here," Commander Perry started. "Your brother mentioned that you saw Lonnie Rodiger buy rope and duct tape?"

Your eyes widened and you drew in a breath. "Is he after me? Did he try and break into mine and Dad's house, Jay, because he was looking for me?"

"No, it's nothing like that," the commander interjected before you got worked up even more. "We just wanted to ask you what you saw is all."

You looked to Jay and he nodded, giving you the go-ahead to tell the two men what you had seen when you were walking home from school a few days ago. So, you did just that. You told them about walking home from school and seeing Lonnie with rope and duct tape and him seeing you.

"And you told your brother this?" Commander Perry asked.

"Uh, yeah, I wasn't going to tell him because I didn't want him to freak out or anything, but he always told me that if I saw anything off with Lonnie to tell him. And, I couldn't sleep that night, so I called him really late and he and Antonio came over."

"And what happened next?"

"Jay said that he wanted me to stay at his house until this all blew over because Lonnie saw me. He saw me. And, he knows where I live."

"So, Jay was trying to keep you safe?"

You nodded. "He's even been picking me up from school because he doesn't want me going home--to mine and my dad's place that is--to wait for him to pick me up after he's done with work. He's worried about me."

"Did he do anything else? Take you anywhere in the two days you've been staying with him?"

"No, nowhere other than school."

"Do anything fun?"

"He brought home Arby's last night and he let me stay up late and finish the Blackhawks game! Dad never lets me do that! And, they even won in overtime! And, I stole some of his curly fries."

"Do you know if he left last night after you went to bed?" Commander Perry asked.

"No, he didn't."

"And how can you be so sure about that? You were sleeping weren't you?"

Jay clenched his fists at his sides. You were a kid and this wasn't a trial, it was just getting a statement from you, not putting you on the witness stand.

"Jay never leaves me when he watches me at night. Never has and probably never will. Even when his girlfriend called when he watched me when I was little, he'd either make her come over to our house or would tell her that he was playing with me."

Voight chuckled at how you were spilling bits and pieces of Jay's life before he became a cop and entered his unit. He knew that Jay would never tell him these things, so it was funny hearing how protective and soft the big-shot detective of one of the most elite units of Chicago was with his little sister.

"Okay, thank you," Commander Perry said. "Do you know why we're asking you these questions?"

You shook your head, no.

"Halstead, you want to explain this. We'll butt in if needed," he said. He didn't know how much you knew about this alleged pedophile and murderer, so he figured it would be best to hand Jay the lead on the explanation portion.

Jay sat down in the chair next to you. "Y/N, you're not in trouble. I promise you that."

"You already told me that," you pointed out.

"I know, but I wanted to tell you again."

You furrowed your eyebrows and cocked your head to the side. "Then, why are they asking me questions about Lonnie and about you? Did he kill someone again? Like he did to Ben?"

Jay swallowed. He wasn't about to tell you the details of how someone murdered Lonnie Rodiger. Despite knowing the details of Ben's murder, you didn't need more gruesome pictures of murder in your teenage mind. "Um, Lonnie was found dead last night."

"And they think you did it, don't they?"

Jay's jaw dropped, all his years of being a stone-faced Army ranger and detective flying out the window as you quickly put the pieces together of why you were being talked to by his sergeant and commander. "What? How- Why would you assume that?"

"Dad's not good with turning his Law and Order down when he watches it at night so sometimes when I can't fall asleep, I'll listen to it and I'll hear the interrogation or trial scenes." You shrugged. Then, you turned your attention to Sergeant Voight and Commander Perry. "If you think my brother did it, I can tell you that he didn't because he was home with me all night. I even woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and he was asleep on the couch with his mouth open and he was drooling." You scrunched up your nose in disgust at Jay's sleeping position last night.

"Alright, Sergeant, your unit can investigate this one. But, Halstead, not that I don't believe your sister, but you're still stripped until this gets all sorted out. Go home."

Jay nodded. "C'mon, Y/N. We can go grab lunch or something."

Jay ushered you out of the break room and you grabbed your backpack. "Halstead, what's going on?" Antonio asked, catching you and Jay on your way down the stairs.

"Just, give this case hell for me, Antonio, will you?"

***

"Is it wrong?" you asked Jay when you were driving away from the district. "That I'm glad Lonnie's dead that is?"

Jay sighed. "Listen, I know we shouldn't be glad about someone being dead, but in all honesty, kid, I'm glad he's dead, too."

"Because the world's a safer place?"

"Yeah." And because justice was served for the Corson family, but I'm not gonna talk to my little sister about killing someone for justice...I don't need her to turn into the female version of Hank Voight in twenty years.

"So, were you and Mouse glad when you killed the bad guys over in Afghanistan?"

Oh no, no, no, no, no. I am not about to have this conversation with her. I'm not about to have this conversation with anyone for that matter, much less with my very impressionable, middle-schooler, little sister. "What do you want for lunch? Mcdonalds? Burger King? Wendy's? Pizza Hut?"

"You never answered my question," you told him.

"And you never answered mine. So, what do you want for lunch?"

"Hmmm...I really like the chicken alfredo from Pizza Hut, so can we go there?"

"Pizza Hut it is."

"What are you gonna get? Wait, lemme guess...meat lover's pizza?"

"And, you would be correct."

You arrived at Pizza Hut, which was only half a block away from the Corson's. And, since it was also so close to your school, some high school seniors would come here for lunch...not that you had an open campus at school, but they'd dip out for lunch and then get back unnoticed before their next class. You wondered if you'd be brave enough to do that in high school. You didn't know and you had a few more years until you got to that grade anyway.

"Hey Detective Halstead," a woman greeted Jay.

"Oh, hey Rachelle," Jay said as you both walked up to the counter at Pizza Hut. "How's school going?"

"It's going great actually. And who's this?" she asked, motioning to you.

"This is my little sister, Y/N. Y/N, this is one of my best CIs, Rachelle."

"You're a CI? That's so cool! So you help my brother solve cases? He never tells me about anything he does, so what do you help him with?"

Jay placed a hand on your shoulder. "That's confidential information, kiddo. And don't go blabbing about her being a CI either, because she could get in trouble."

"Got it. She's just someone I know from coming here so much. I have no idea what you're talking about, Jay."

Jay laughed. "Alright, what can I get started for you two?" Rachelle asked.

"Actually, since you're here, I have a quick question for you."

"Okay, let's go around back," she replied, thinking he was going to ask her if she knew anything that might help them with a case.

"No, it's nothing like that. I was just wondering if you'd watch Y/N for a bit while I go run a quick errand? It'd be for twenty, thirty minutes tops."

She looked around the restaurant, it was practically empty. "Yeah, no problem. I can keep an eye on her."

"Awesome thanks. And, uh, she'll have the chicken alfredo and I'll have the meat lover's pizza."

Rachelle rang it up and then told Jay the total. He pulled out his wallet and paid for their food, not without placing a ten-dollar bill in the tip jar. "You didn't have to do that," Rachelle said.

"You're watching Trouble here for a bit, so yeah, I do."

"I am not trouble!" you protested. "Where are you going anyway?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll be back soon."

"But--"

"Hey, Y/N. You want a chocolate chip cookie? I think they just came out of the oven." You frantically nodded your head up and down. "Well, c'mon back here and I'll grab it for you."

She opened the piece of the counter that flipped up and you walked through. Then, she motioned for Jay to leave before you pressed him for more answers on where he was going.

***

"To be honest, I don't feel any sympathy," Danny Corson told Jay as he sat at the kitchen table next to his wife with Jay across from him. "Do the police have any idea who did it?"

Jay had come to the Corson household to tell them the news that Lonnie Rodiger was dead...and to ask Danny some questions that would not go on record.

"We're still trying to piece that together." Jay turned to the red-haired woman. "Gail, do you have ay milk for this?" he asked, holding out his coffee cup."

"Oh, yeah. Let me get it for you," Gail answered.

"Thank you," Jay said to Gail's retreating back as she left the table. Jay turned back to Danny. "They suspended me. They think I did it. So, if you did something, Danny, I need you to tell me now so that we can figure this out together."

"Jay, I have been fantasizing about it for years, but I didn't do it. After all you've done for this family though, if you need me to confess, then I will."

"No, no you will not. I will not let you, or me for that matter, go down for something neither of us did."

"So, you have no idea who did it?"

"At the moment, no."

Jay's phone rang and he held up a finger to tell Danny he'd just be a second. But, then he looked at who was calling him and he practically froze.

"Jay, you okay?" Danny asked.

"Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine." He accepted the call and placed his phone to his ear. "Rachelle? What's going on? Is Y/N okay?"

"Physically she's fine," she answered. "But, there's this guy yelling at her asking where you are and--"

"Tell me where he is! Your brother! My son is dead because of him!" Jay heard through the phone.

Phil Rodiger.

Jay drew in a breath. "I'm on my way."

He hung up and then turned to Danny and Gail. "I gotta go, I'm sorry. If I find out anything, you'll be the first to know." And then he ran out the door and ran as fast as he ever has to the Pizza Hut half a block away.

***

"He didn't do it!" you yelled. "He was home with me all night!"

"Yeah right! He probably told you to say that!"

"Y/N! Don't say another word!" Jay sprinted over to the booth where you were sitting, your pasta halfway eaten.

"You! You killed him!"

"Phil, we're in a public place. The cops can get called for a disturbance." Jay flicked his eyes to Rachelle and she nodded, picking up her phone.

"Fine! Then let them call the cops! I'll tell them that you killed him! You killed my son!"

He took a step closer to the side of the booth that you were sitting in and Jay quickly placed himself between you and Lonnie Rodiger's father. "You know what? I may have not killed him, but whoever did, did everyone in this world a real favor! Killing a pedophile and a murderer? I'd like to give the guy who killed your sick-ass bastard of a son a medal when they find him!"

"Jay!" you yelled, grabbing the back of his shirt and tugging it so that he would turn his attention back to you.

"Y/N, this is grown-up stuff. Butt out!" He turned back to Phil. "Lonnie brought this on himself and you know it!"

You saw a few people from the Intelligence Unit walking up to the building out of the corner of your eye. "Jay, shut the hell up!"

"You killed him!"

"For the last time, I didn't kill your sorry excuse for a son!"

"Police! Break it up!"

Jay was yanked away from you by none other than Antonio Dawson. Adam and Voight had each grabbed one of Phil's shoulders to keep him at bay. Erin knelt in front of you.

"Are you alright, Y/N?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

"What the hell, Halstead?" Antonio yelled.

"Wre're taking you in," Voight told Phil Rodiger.

"Am I under arrest?"

"No, we just have some questions about last night we want to ask you is all. Why? Should you be under arrest?"

"No, but he should! I know you did it--"

"We'll talk to him," Voight said. "Don't you worry about that." He turned to Antonio. "You and Lindsay got this, bro?"

"Yeah, we got this," Antonio answered.

Voight nodded and then he and Ruzek escorted Phil Rodiger out of the building.

Antonio waited until Voight's car was safely out of the parking lot, before trying to lead Jay out of the building.

"Dude, I don't need a police escort. I can drive my car back home just fine," Jay protested.

"Jay, just come on. Or do I need to put you in cuffs?" He pulled his handcuffs out of his pocket and allowed them to dangle off his pointer finger.

"Tony, not here," Erin warned. "Not with Y/N watching."

You gasped. They weren't going to arrest Jay, were they? No, they wouldn't. They couldn't.

"Let's just go out to the car," Antonio said.

Once you were all in the car, Antonio driving, Erin in the passenger seat, and you and Jay in the back, did Jay finally address the elephant in the room...or, well, the elephant in the car. "Just so we're clear, I didn't kill Lonnie Rodiger. If I was gonna kill him, I would've done it the night he raped and murdered an eleven-year-old Ben Corson! I was this close, too!"

Your breath caught in your throat. You had assumed he had been raped, hell you had heard Jay talk about it with Gail and Danny, once with your dad, when they thought you were too far out of earshot to hear or thought that you were asleep. But, hearing Jay say it out loud, right in front of you, made it more real than hearing it when you weren't supposed to. And, hearing Jay say that had thoughts about killing Lonnie before...you didn't know how to feel about that. You had wanted him dead, just like Jay had (and how the Corson's probably did as well) but you never thought Jay would actually admit to wanting to kill him, much less say that he had been close to doing it.

"Shit, Y/N, I'm sorry I never told you about that," Jay said, his voice much quieter now. "I just, I didn't know how to tell you and you were ten, so you shouldn't have even known what rape was and I didn't want to explain it to you under those circumstances--"

"I knew," you told him.

"What?" he gasped as he furrowed his eyebrows. "How?"

"I heard you talking to the Corson's once when you thought I couldn't hear you and once when you were talking to Dad when you  both thought that I was asleep."

"Well, either way, I'm sorry you had to hear it from me like this. And, I'm sorry he had to go through that."

"Me too," you whispered.

Erin leaned back and handed Jay a file folder. He raised an eyebrow.

"Lonnie Rodiger's homicide file," Antonio told him. "If anyone asks, no ones knows how you got that."

"That goes for you, too, Y/N. As far as you're concerned, you don't know what a homicide file is."

"What's homicide?" you joked. "I don't even know what that is."

"Works for me," Erin said as Jay flipped open the file.

***

"What'd he say? Jay asked, cornering Antonio in the locker room.

"Not here," Antonio told him and led him to the basement.

Once the two detectives were safely in the basement, Antonio let Jay in on the statement that Phil Rodiger had just given the Intelligence Unit about Lonnie Rodiger's murder.

"Can I run something by you?" Jay asked.

"Shoot."

"So, Phil Rodiger gives his statement, and he says...that his son never came home that night," Jay took a deep breath, hoping he wasn't going to get in trouble for saying this. "But I know he did. I may have not gone straight to my apartment after I got takeout for me and Y/N before we watched the Hawks game together."

"I'll talk to Voight. But, I think Y/N needs some help with homework, so go be the good big brother and do that." Antonio clapped Jay on the back and then started up the stairs.

***

"We're good to go," Antonio told him. "But, we got a problem."

"Which is?" Jay asked, raising an eyebrow.

"They kicked him."

"The hell do you mean they kicked him?"

"I mean, they don't think he did it. But, Jin's getting a location on him." Antonio's phone binged. "And here is that location. Erin, you riding with me? Halstead will follow. I got the photos."

Erin picked up her coat. "Ruzek, watch the kid, okay?"

"You got it," he answered, walking over to the break room.

"Ruz, please do not corrupt my sister."

"I'm hurt Jay, really. That hurt, man," he joked.

The three detectives left the district and made their way to a bar where Phil Rodiger was sitting and drinking alone. The three had agreed that only Jay should go in so that he wouldn't get spooked and try to run off.

Jay entered the bar and took a seat next to Phil. He sighed and rolled his eyes, but started Jay on his reasoning anyway. "In the statement you gave the detectives, you said that you didn't see Lonnie after 10:00 pm, that he went for a drive and he never came back." Jay placed a photo on the bar in front of Phil. "I was following Lonnie that night, and not long after these pictures were taken, I watched him walk into your house. Lonnie got tired of hunting, so he went home. And according to the time of death, he was killed an hour after I took this photo." Phil Rodiger just stared at the photo as Jay turned his attention away from it and onto Phil. "Your son wasn't killed in the park, was he?"

Phil stood up and brought his face close to Jay's. "You got no idea what you're talking about."

Then, he started to walk away, but Jay got up and followed him. Jay was pretty sure his cop instincts were right once again. "Phil, where you going?" Jay paused and looked at him. Phil was looking at the floor and avoiding eye contact the way only a guilty man would. "You killed him."

"He was sick."

Yeah, we all knew that. Took you long enough, Jay thought to himself.

Then, Erin and Antonio rushed in and put Phil in cuffs.

***

Half an hour later, Jay was standing in front of the one-way window with Voight, watching Erin do her thing in the interrogation room.

"I found some pictures on his computer," Phil told Erin. "Boys, same age as the Corson kid. Then I- I confronted him."

"How did you kill Lonnie?" Erin asked, straight to the point. The faster this got straightened out, the faster Jay'd get his badge and gun back.

"We fought. I picked up a belt, and I just- I just kept choking him." Phil tried to keep the tears back, but he couldn't. What kind of father would kill their own son? But then again, most fathers didn't have sons who were monsters.

"And then you dropped his body in the park?"

"Yes."

Jay walked out of the interrogation room the minute he heard those words. He knew Voight had heard the same things he had. So, when Voight motioned for Jay to step into his office, this time, Jay didn't hesitate.

Voight pulled open a drawer and grabbed Jay's badge and gun. "Good to have you back."

"Thanks, Sarge."

"Now, go and get your sister out of here. I think she's bored out of her mind."

Jay chuckled and clipped his badge onto his jeans and holstered his gun. "His dad did it?" you asked, exiting the break room.

"How did you know that?"

"Ruzek told me!"

"Dude! I told you not to corrupt her!"

"Technically, I didn't corrupt her. I told her the truth," he defended.

"Fine, whatever. Mind giving us a ride so we can go get my car back from Pizza Hut?"

"Yeah, no problem."

"I call shotgun!" you yelled and started to race down the stairs.

"No fair!" Jay exclaimed as he chased after you.

***

You and Jay were crouched in front of Ben's grave, the flowers you had planted four days ago brightening the dismal place up a bit. "They got him, Ben, they got him," you explained. "Jay almost got in trouble for it, but it turns out that Lonnie's dad did it." You paused as if waiting for Ben's reaction. You knew he would be saying something along the lines of no way where he was. "I know, no way, right?"

"You okay?" Jay asked as he placed a hand on your shoulder.

You had stopped talking after you asked that rhetorical question. You had no idea what to say now. Ben was still gone.

"I guess it doesn't feel as good as I thought it would," you said, turning your attention to Jay. "It's as if I thought that finding who did this would bring Ben back. I feel relief, but that's it."

"Hey, no matter what you're feeling, it's okay. The way this went down today and the past few days don't matter. We got justice for Ben and that's all that matters. You got justice for Ben. You were the one who saw Lonnie with that rope and duct tape and told me. You were the reason this entire case got off the ground."

"Really?"

"Really," Jay confirmed.

"Well, at least it's justice."

"At least it's justice," Jay echoed.

A/N: Thank you for the amazing feedback on the first installment of this series I posted a few days ago! Your comments really got me motivated to write this one! But, I have some bad news, which is that since I have exams in a week and a half, I won't be posting for at least two weeks, probably closer to two and a half.

Anyway, thank you for reading, and please vote and comment! Reading your comments really gets me motivated to write...even though the next chapter will have to wait a while since I have exams.

taglist: @theambracer88 @virtualreader @kelelas-life @celyndavies @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @anotherfan07

#jay halstead #will halstead #chicago pd #jay halstead imagine #chicago pd fanfiction #halstead sister #halstead sister imagine #Halstead brothers #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #imagine

[yanderes-galore]

Been seeing your Yandere Human Pokemon lately and I came across headcanons Yandere Male Greninja and I am OBSESSED! Could I request a Yandere Male Lucario that I used to raise as Riolu it can be headcanon but if there's a dialogue I'm really couldn't be more happy☺️❤

*I hope my English is good enough for you to understand because English is not my first language😅*

I'll see what I can do for you 😊

Yandere! Male! Human! Lucario Concept

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Yandere behavior, Overattachment, Possessive behavior, Violent behavior, Stalking.

- Riolu is a hard to find Pokemon in the wild.

- How you met your Riolu was probably through a friend or fellow trainer.

- You had been looking for one for ages, when you were given the opportunity to train one you took it!

- Upon first meeting you, your Riolu is rather quiet.

- He hid behind his old trainer with a worried look.

- Nonetheless you were patient and took it slow, staying around the Riolu and allowing him to warm up to you.

- Once knowing you weren't dangerous the Riolu stayed by you.

- He's shy at first but then becomes more rambunctious as you train him.

- You find him rather funny and maybe even annoying sometimes.

- Despite the reckless behavior your Riolu has, he soon mellows out when you introduce him to more battles.

- He gets better at aura reading, too.

- To the point he even starts reading your aura often.

- When you're upset you always manage to find your Riolu nearby, a frown on his face.

- "What happened?"

- It was nice to see your Riolu learn to control his abilities as he got older.

- Recklessness soon dissolved into calm and collected behavior in and out of battle.

- As your bond grew, Riolu got stronger.

- It actually caught you by surprise when you left your Riolu at home ao you could work before coming back to a fully mature Lucario.

- "I've grown much stronger! What challenge shall we take on next?"

- Lucario is a Steel/Fighting type that evolves through friendship.

- Fighting types are already incredibly loyal to their trainers.

- Pokemon that evolve through friendship also have a high chance to be Yandere for their trainer.

- Lucario would be quite a troubling Yandere.

- He's by you all the time after he evolves.

- He also knows how you and others are feeling due to his aura reading.

- Your aura dips? Your Lucario is awfully touchy and attention hungry.

- You have a friend that likes you a bit too much? Your Lucario's growling.

- You find his behavior cute at first, like when he was younger, now it's just odd.

- Especially when you notice him being violent towards others, including other trainers.

- You're frantically trying to scold him and warn others around you about your Lucario.

- "He wasn't always like this! I'm so sorry...."

- Lucario even knows his behavior isn't making you happy, your aura screams that.

- But frankly, he doesn't care.

- What kind of companion would he be if he didn't keep you out of danger?

- If you wish, he promises he won't kill anyone.

- You may get rid of him if he did....

- "I'll never leave you. In return, I ask you never leave me."

- Trying to get out of your Lucario's grasp is a nearly impossible task, too.

- Not only is he skilled in fighting and agility, but releasing him isn't going to save you.

- After releasing him he'll only think you betrayed him.

- While you lay in your home, trying to push the past of your Lucario away.

- Your Lucario is watching you from your window, eyes narrowed.

- "We're supposed to be partners forever, I'm not leaving that easily."

#yandere x reader #yandere pokemon #yandere human pokemon #yandere lucario

[midnightsconspiracy]

Stages of Grief

Stages of Grief - @midnightsconspiracy

Summary: You’re there when Justin passes, and so you have to watch your husband go through the five stages as he grieves his son

Warnings: Death

Word Count: 1393

Requested: No

A/N: I’ve had this idea for ages but only finally got around to it!! :)

Masterlist

Loss is a funny thing really. Especially when the person is so young and healthy, that nobody could possibly prepare for their deaths. And that was what had happened in the case of Justin Voight. A man who had turned his life around entirely, a child and wife at home waiting for him and no longer in any sort of risky business, or so he said. But his actions had ultimately led to his death, leaving his usually emotionless father to grieve accordingly. It was not as if he was alone in this process though, as you remained by his side, watching as he went through the five stages of grief.

In the beginning, it was as though everything was normal, both of you going about your daily lives as usual. And that extended to your evenings as well, cuddled up on the sofa, watching the same programme you did each night. The only irregularity was his watchful eyes, ones that remained glued on his phone, scrambling to move every time it would light up. It made you sympathised with him greatly, knowing that the last remaining piece of Camille had been ripped from him so suddenly. But some part of his mind had convinced him this was a mistake, and although he'd requested his son's life support to be turned off and been there to witness also, that somehow it wasn't true. That the notifications from his phone were going to be from the hospital, informing him how Justin had made this miraculous turnaround and in fact not dead at all. This was just his way of coping was what you told yourself, knowing this allowed him to gradually come to grips with this huge loss. It was like the world around him had stopped, immune to the messages he was receiving from his loved ones, Justin was alive and he would come through the front door any moment now. And although a Hank without emotions was nothing uncommon for you, experiencing it most days, there was a part of you that just wanted to shake him, tell him Justin was gone and never coming back. But you couldn't bring yourself to do that, knowing you would have to allow him to process this properly, at his own pace, and not yours. Denial.

Once the realisation that his son was really gone, the old Hank, the one before you knew him, began showing. His unremorseful, overbearing anger welling up, expelling from every part of his being. And it wasn't as if it was just towards the man who had done this, or Justin himself for being involved in dangerous things. Anyone who crossed him the wrong way seemed to become a victim, and with you being in such close proximity, living together and all, received the brunt of it. What you had learned being with Hank for a number of years though, was that in reality it wasn't because he was actually angry, but instead masking whatever other emotions he had, and in this case it was sadness. That thought allowed you to be less mad at him, this was a part of the process after all. Once he'd taken out the man who had pulled the trigger though, things seemed to calm a little, the main object of his rage having been taken out. However, it didn't fully stop there, his fury now mainly focusing on his dead son, shouting up to the heavens that it wouldn't have happened if he hadn't involved himself in such illegal activities or listened to the advice his father had given him. That didn't mean it didn't extend to others though, spending countless minutes of your life watching him unnecessarily discipline people at work and destroy any photos of Justin that were littered around the house. So you just picked up the pieces, wanting to be a supportive wife for him. Anger.

Although Hank had never believed in a higher power, these newfound emotions bought him as close as he'd even been. Asking whoever could hear him to take away the grief that he felt in that very moment, wanting to be free of the pain he held. He just wanted some control back in his life, feeling as though any stability that he'd once possessed had been thrown out the window. That belief extending to yourself as well, and as much as you tried to support him, it was inevitable. The bubble he'd isolated himself inside, refusing to pop and let you in. At night you'd awake to him on the edge of the bed, whispering to himself, mulling over all the things he could have done better. What if he'd just called Justin to see if he was ok? Or if only he'd showed him a better example of being a good person! And as much as you tried, his mind was already set, the 'what ifs' and 'if onlys' plaguing his mind. His thoughts so self-deprecating, that the blame solely rested on himself. That mindset not only hurt him mentally but also yourself, knowing nothing about it was his fault, he couldn't have done anything that would have stopped it from happening. Although you tried to tell him otherwise, it was set in stone for him, making you feel equally bad about yourself. As if you were a failure, that you could even do the simple task of helping your husband grieve. Bargaining.

Then the emotions came, deep routed sadness, that took over his whole being. The once vocal and loving man you knew, became a shell of himself, spending much of his time alone, only with his thoughts. It was as though you were living by yourself again, eating at separate times, never facing each other in bed or sleeping in separate ones entirely. And although you were sad from your son-in-law's death, this only intensified what you felt, as if you had lost two people you held dearly. You just told yourself this was natural though, you had expected this when you were first been informed of Justin's death. But these were raw, unfiltered emotions that broke your heart, watching as he went through it all by himself. Eventually, after numerous tries of getting through, he allowed you in, finally feeling as though you were useful. And despite your feelings, you continued to support him, holding him at night as he sobbed into your chest, crying to you whilst asking 'what am I without him?' Maybe in the long run it wouldn't be good repressing your own emotions, but your nature screamed at you to help him first, that you had promised during your wedding vows to always put him ahead of yourself. And at least he was expressing himself, just glad he wouldn't bottle this up, only to explode another day. Depression.

Finally, after some time, he reached the last stage, and although not completely feeling as though the weight had been taken off his chest, a part of him felt as though he would be ok. He now knew Justin was gone for good and no amount of pleading would bring him back, it was something he would just have to admit. His life felt as though it was going back to normal, and although there was still a part of him missing, he would continue to thrive not just for himself but for his son and late wife. He could now focus on other things as well, helping Olive and his grandson have a happy, healthy life, just the way he would want them to be. And you, you finally had your husband back. Although things weren't completely as they were before, you could accept that, just knowing the man you loved was no longer hurting and feeling the pain he did before. Every once in a while he would slip though, the emotions resurfacing as before, and so you just nursed him through it, loving him as best as you could. Putting up the broken photos, he allowed himself to look back on all the good memories noting 'how he was grateful for all the time that he had been granted with his son.' And for the first time, he realised that Justin wouldn't want him to dwell on this, instead create new memories with the people he still had on the earth with him. Acceptance.

----------

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#chicago pd #chicago pd imagines #chicago pd x reader #one chicago #hank voight x reader #hank voight #hank voight imagines

[faulty-writes]

Warning: Blood mention, Injury mention, Spoilers from Manga. 

Fandom: My Hero Academia 

Characters: All For One, All Might!Daughter Reader, Toshinori Yagi, Izuku Midoriya. 

Word Count:  12,069

[ I present to you the long awaited part two of the All For One request. The first part is located here. I know there was an ask that I had received that requested a part two. I have no idea what happened to it. But, regardless. I hope you enjoy, I also hope the length makes up for the long wait. As usual, please excuse any spelling errors. ] 

[ It’s been over a year since you agreed to become All For One’s successor. Your disappearance baffled those you used to hold dear, including your classmates and your father. However, under All For One’s guidance. You learned to channel all your hatred into one goal. Though wanting to kill Izuku Midoriya and your father seems a tad irrational. Your mind is too far gone to believe otherwise. The destruction that follows would prove to be one that hero society wasn’t prepared for. ] 

The story of the missing UA student went viral almost overnight, there were several internet articles, even theories revolving around your sudden disappearance. Every news station in Japan did some type of report on it, the police were involved in several investigations which caused the UA campus to be littered with authority figures. Each one trying to gather clues that would lead up to a possible explanation for your disappearance. The hospital staff was asked several questions as well, such as when you were brought in, and if anyone had seen you leave.

The records showed you were not released from the hospital, so that led most conspiracy theorists to conclude something like you had been abducted or someone had used their quirk on you which effectively made you vanish from existence. But, the biggest surprise was your father, Toshinori Yagi also known as All Might, expressing his concern for you. However, what shocked the world most was when he revealed that you were his daughter. You found the confession pathetic. Truth be told, it had been over a year since your disappearance and part of you wondered if anyone even thought about you.

If your father felt any remorse knowing he was the cause of your disappearance. Given the pain and anger he had caused you, it was what he deserved. You should have had One For All passed down to you, but no. Your father chose someone so unworthy, so unfitting. Izuku Midoriya was now your sworn enemy and you wanted to see him and your father fall. All For One promised he would assist in your goal. It was almost amusing, your father’s worst enemy helping you. Treating you like an equal, believing in you. Acting more like a father figure than your actual father.

Still, the day after you agreed to become his successor, he introduced you to the League of Villains. You knew they were small in numbers, but you learned rather quickly that Tomura Shigaraki was not to be messed with. His psychotic drive to rule over the hero world and cast it into darkness was scary, but the fact that nothing would stop him from his goal was admirable. It almost inspired you, though when you first met him. He threatened to kill you, especially knowing your connection to All Might. He argued that no purebred hero, one who carried All Might’s DNA, should be deserving of becoming All For One’s successor.

You came to understand that All For One had adopted Tomura when he was a child, apparently, he had no where else to go. He was a lonely orphan and All For One took him under his wing. However, he seemed to know that Tomura desired to go down his own path as opposed to the one All For One laid out for him. Which led him to find someone else that would step into the position and effectively destroy All Might and his successor, Izuku Midoriya. That, someone, happened to be you and he knew you wouldn’t disappoint him. You had also met Dabi, Toga, Twice, and Mr.Compress.

You found Dabi to be rather standoffish while Toga was the exact opposite. It was strange having someone latch onto you and immediately go off about how happy they are to make a new friend. Mr.Compress was more polite than anything, but you got the feeling he didn’t exactly like dealing with kids. Twice was...an interesting character, who immediately treated you like you were a member of the family. But, you didn’t get to spend much time with anyone. All For One took it upon himself to immediately start your training, at first it was simple.

Running trails to assess your current ability, considering your father’s quirk wasn’t genetically passed on. Still, your quirk was impressive nonetheless. You had some extra physical strength and you could momentarily fly if you kicked off the ground hard enough. It wasn’t an aspect of your quirk that you normally used, considering you preferred being on the ground. You had tactical intellect, but you were a little slow when it came to using it in the heat of battle, and that disappointed All For One. Still, he found your skills impressive enough and fairly warned you how intense the training would become.

Warned that even if you were battered and bruised, you had to continue. You had to stand up on your feet again. At first, you thought he was exaggerating, but your assumption was wrong. As the training continued, you were beaten until you were a bloody pulp. All For One insisted it was to better yourself, to make you faster, quicker, sharper. More violent, more determined. You had to give him credit, just as he promised. He would show you more love than your own father, he’d always pull you into his arms after every training session.

No matter how much blood covered your person, he’d run his fingers through your unruly hair and whisper how proud he was of you and once again remind you that you were his successor. That all this pain and training would be worth it in the end. Six months in, All For One introduced you to the miracle that was his quirk. “My young successor, you’ll be more powerful than you know. I will give you a copy of my power when you finally prove yourself to me. For now…” you’d never forget how he reached out and the pain that coursed through your body as soon as his fingers touched your face.

You fell to your knees, clenching your jaw as All For One generously transferred one of his quirks to you. It was almost as though your body couldn’t handle the sudden surge of limited power, you swore you felt your heart stop just before blacking out. All For One seemed most forgiving as he understood the limitations of quirks to one's body, but made it clear he still expected the best from you. It was a strange feeling, possessing another one’s quirk and learning how to use it, what triggers made it click or appear.

You couldn’t help but think back to Izuku, was this the way he felt when your father passed One For All to him? You had to admit, it was a challenge. But, All For One insisted on intensifying your training. Believing that the added stress would quicken your quirk ability. Come 9 months, he bestowed another quirk onto you and he was rather pleased how well you received it. Unlike before, you didn’t blackout. Despite the toll the quirks took on your body, you were more than grateful to All For One and continued down your path as his successor.

Come 12 months, you had mastered your gifted quirks and learned to control them alongside your birth quirk. You knew it was finally time to unleash your anger, you would locate Izuku Midoriya and finally prove to your father just how worthy you were. All For One had gotten you a special outfit just for the occasion, you thought it was strange at first. Seeing as it resembled the suit that he normally wore, the same aspect went for the mask that was a part of the getup as well. The rest of your costume consisted of a long-sleeved shirt, made of a special material that would allow better movement and usage of your quirks.

That same material made up your pants and on your feet were heavy boots which All For One insisted would better keep your balance and cause more damage if you chose to use your kicking power. You took a deep breath, it was funny. You could barely recognize your reflection in the mirror and your mind was busy replaying the past year. Your memories of the first year at UA and the hospital where All For One convinced you to become his successor. You had changed so much since that simple time, not only was your heart blackened. You had physically changed as well, both because of the quirks All For One gave you and his training.

You had gained an impressive amount of muscle and learned how to shut off certain emotions. Despite that, you could hear that small voice in the back of your head ‘Is this the right thing to do?’ you shook your head. Of course it was, this is what you wanted from the very beginning. You nearly gasped when a hand grabbed your shoulder and watched as All For One’s reflection appeared alongside yours. You could tell there was a smile on his face before he leaned down next to your ear, “You look beautiful my successor,” he said before leaning up, you swallowed hard when you felt his hand run through your hair.

The image of your father doing the same popped into your head, and you couldn’t help but close your eyes. “Thank you,” the words were whispered, maybe you were a little anxious for whatever happened next. Still, you turned around, looking at All For One with a determined glance, “What now? I want Izuku Midoriya to fall, you promised you would help me achieve that,” you said with a hiss and your fists tightened as All For One laughed, was he mocking you? “Now, now…” he reached out, once more running his fingers through your hair.

“All in good time, be a good girl and do as I instruct and Izuku Midoriya will fall into your lap,” he promised, knowing that you were growing rather impatient. You had waited for this day, and he was rather eager to watch you cause destruction. In addition to knowing it would cause pain to All Might, which he particularly favored. The only remaining detail was how to get Izuku Midoriya to come to you. There were many ways you could do this, including pretending to be a civilian who needed help and have the unsuspecting hero run after you. Perhaps corner him and pounce. 

But, All For One suggested something a little more traumatizing, you’d reveal yourself to Izuku and the world all at once. After all, the game of cat and mouse was quite entertaining. The well-known fact about luring Izuku to you was that All Might, the former symbol of peace, would no doubt follow. So, you were rather happy knowing there was a chance you’d be able to take both of them out. “Very well, when do we start?” you questioned and watched as All For One smiled, which was something you were more or less used to. He then turned, raising his hand.

You were a tad confused when he motioned you to follow him, but you knew better than to disobey his order. Regardless if it was a verbal command or not. You trailed behind him, exiting the rather gloomy room that had been your bedroom for the last year. You walked down a darkened hallway and the only source of illumination was coming from a nearby elevator that you stepped into with All For One. You remained quiet as he pressed a button and the elevator began going up. You pressed yourself against the nearest wall and almost shyly glanced at the man.

The one who took you in, the one who trained you, the one who was helping you essentially get revenge on the ones that hurt you. Once more you felt your stomach twist and tried to push the small sense of guilt down. No, your father and Izuku deserved this. They deserved it. Your thoughts were shattered when you felt a hand come to rest on the top of your head, you jumped in surprise and All For One chuckled. “Thoughts bothering you again?” he questioned and you parted your lips to answer, but ended up glancing to the side.

“Hm,” he frowned and reached down to grab your chin. You hissed as he forced your head up and wrapped your hand around his wrist. Despite the fact All For One had no eyes, you couldn’t help but widen yours in fear. His grip was menacing and it only reminded you that if he truly wanted, he could easily kill you anytime he pleased. “Do not let guilt rule you, I have taught you better than that. Focus on your goal and only your goal,” he reminded you yet again before releasing your jaw, you could feel your skin lightly throb and partly wondered if he had left bruises.

Yet, small bruises meant nothing in comparison to the numerous injuries you had received throughout your training. When the elevator finally stopped and the doors opened, you followed All For One out and realized you were on the rooftop overlooking part of the city. Though it looked far away and the sun was setting which caused the buildings to illuminate, you could make out the lighted windows and a nostalgic feeling came over you. A powerful gust of wind came and carried your hair with it, oddly enough you recalled a memory.

Yes, you and your father had done this. Though you had to admit, your father was a tad odd and not the brightest when it came to educating children. Still, somehow or another he convinced you to join him on the rooftop of UA, something that you thought was against the rules. But, it was shortly after you had gotten into the hero course. It seemed like a lifetime ago now, but you recalled the way your father smiled and proceeded to tell you to do your best. Your hands curled into fists, that was the only real advice he ever gave you and now he’d be paying for it.

Your best was never good enough for the symbol of peace. You took a deep breath and walked over to the edge of the building, laying your hands on the cold metal railing. All For One remained standing behind you, uncharacteristically quiet. You partly wondered if he was waiting for you to speak or simply enjoying the sunset. Still, you turned to him with narrowed eyes. “When can I finally-” he held his hand up to silence you, “I said to be a good girl, I brought you up here to observe,” you raised your eyebrow and turned back to the distant city.

“Observe what!?” you exclaimed, arms out and hands moving all around as if something interesting would actually happen. All For One chuckled and laid his hand gently on your shoulder, “Look at the city, how quiet it is,” he began. You blinked, “Yeah?” you wondered where he was going with such a statement, “Imagine the chaos that will occur once you bring Izuku Midoriya down, you will be able to take this city. Crush anyone who dares oppose you, this is my gift to you,” he explained as his hand reached up to grab your chin, he was less forceful this time and gently turned your head.

You wore a blank expression as you stared at him. He remained silent except for the smile on his face, “Now,” he released your chin, “enjoy the moments prior to your victory, you start tomorrow,” he said as he turned to walk back to the elevator. Your eyes widened and you quickly spun on your feet, “T-Tomorrow?” you questioned, your voice coming off as clueless and rather shaky. He told you to wait and be patient only to tell you that your plans will be set in motion tomorrow? It didn’t make a lot of sense to you, however, you recalled being taught that villains were dangerous and their radical way of thinking often drove them to the point of madness.

Thus why a hero always had to be careful when facing a potentially dangerous threat, many heroes lost their lives to carelessness and this time, it would be Izuku Midoriya. The thought alone brought a smile to your face and you quickly adjusted your mask before following All For One into the elevator. “Tomorrow,” you whispered as the doors closed behind you. The following night was calm, though you couldn’t help but feel a sense of happiness as you laid in bed. All For One usually checked on you every hour or so.

You recall he did it more when you first agreed to become his successor. You assumed he checked on you to ensure you hadn’t escaped or were trying to. But, after a while, it turned into something that he did out of care and in a way, it helped you sleep. When you woke, you went through your normal morning routine which included getting ready for the day, eating something, and your usual training session which lasted until noon. After that, All For One ordered you to get into your costume which you happily did and once you were ready.

You followed him to the rooftop. “I assume you remember the plan, my successor,” you took a deep breath, the world seemed so still around you. “Mmhm,” you responded with a nod, but your eyes remained focused on the city landscape. A moment of silence filled the air before you climbed onto the railing, perfectly balanced. “Go,” All For One gave the single command and you jumped like a perfect obedient puppy.

But damn, you couldn’t help but feel alive as you descended toward the ground below. The wind whipped through your body like paper, your hair blew everywhere, and yet you felt utterly weightless. As you prepared to land, you angled your body just so and activated one of the quirks, All For One was generous enough to give you Forced Quirk Activation. This caused black jagged limbs to extend from your palm, you also had the option to use your fingers. Normally this quirk was reserved to activate others' quirks against their will, but it could be doubled as a weapon of sorts.

Easily piercing through human flesh, among other things. Either way, it proved useful as it split the pavement below. You clenched your jaw as a small pain radiated through your hand but you ignored it. More than likely, it was a sign that your body was continuing to try and reject your gifted quirks. You knew that a quirk was essentially an evolution of the human race and if you were special, you were gifted with more than one. An example of this was your old classmate, Shoto Todoroki. Ice and fire were his gifts.

His body was capable of handling those quirks while your body was merely a test dummy. But, you didn’t care. The pain was only a reminder of your goal, you focused your attention forward and continued to move. Surely you were noticeable and rather scary as you continued to close the distance between yourself and the city. As one would expect, as soon as civilians saw you overhead, they began screaming. This effectively caught the attention of the authorities, but they weren't worth your time.

Still, it was rather annoying watching as the cops scattered and barked commands into their radios. Your eyes narrowed as you continued down the crowded streets of Tokyo, more jagged limbs grew from your shoulders which gave your palm a rest. You paused a moment and looked at the lines of blood which dripped from your palm and seeped down to your wrist. “Worth it…” you muttered just as a few police cars sped toward you. The glare from their flashing lights irritated your vision.

Did they truly have to make such a scene? You were merely looking for something or rather someone. But, this was the ignorance of the hero world. Even if you were being “innocent”, merely on a stroll. They had to interfere with your business. You narrowed your eyes as one officer stepped forward and through their megaphone commanded you to surrender. You glanced at the pathetic barricade of police cars they had formed, did they truly think such a thing would stop you?

You couldn’t help the chuckle that left your lips and gave a wicked smile, “I’m just looking for someone, but if you’re going to be difficult…” you trailed off and raised your hand. You could feel vibrations course through your fingertips before a powerful air shock wave came. You watched in amusement as the city vibrated, almost like an earthquake. Causing the pavement to crack and the windows of the police cars to shatter violently. The nearby buildings seemed to shake, cracks appearing across their structure and broken windows.

As expected, the display of your power caused a panic. A single scream pierced through the air before civilians began to run to safety. Pushing each other down in an attempt to save their own life, pathetic. Yet, it somehow made you smile. In the distance, you could hear the sound of a helicopter. More than likely coming to do a report on your attack on the city. You’d deal with them later, instead, you retracted those jagged limbs and fell to the cracked street below. Landing on your knee with your arm outstretched to support you.

The civilians who were still running made sure to evade you as you locked your eyes on the remaining authority figures. At least some of them were brave enough to keep standing, did they think they were being heroic by living up to their duties? That was pathetic, however, you noticed one of them was standing in front of the others. More than likely the chief, the ones that stood behind him had their guns up and pointed in your direction. Rather a foolish thing to do when innocent lives were rushing around.

The heavy feeling of fear continued to linger in the air which only made your next set of words, somewhat terrifying, “Please, don’t be foolish.” you could see they were all shaking which caused those guns to tremble as well, you half expected one of them to fire theirs prematurely. But then again, surely they were too frightened to properly use those guns. But, you thought taking care of them first would be best. So, without hesitation, you held your palm out, and once more those air shockwaves came.

You didn’t care if they got injured as a result, nor that sickening crack that followed as their bodies hit the ground. Several gunshots sounded, more than likely triggered by their harsh impact. Luckily no bullet hit you. Yet, the chief seemed to have taken less damage. Having been thrown against one of the police vehicles, causing the driver door to get dented in and it appeared their arm was bleeding. More than likely from the shattered glass of the window. They seemed disorientated for the moment. But, that didn’t stop you from approaching them.

You leaned close and with a happy smirk on your face, you spoke, “Scared? Don’t worry, I won’t kill you...yet,” without warning, you wrapped your fingers around their neck. Your nails sunk into the flesh of their throat and you chuckled as they weakly reached up to try and claw at the back of your hand. But mere scratches didn’t bother you. A growl sounded before you pulled them forward and menacingly looked them in the eye. “I’m looking for Deku,” you growled, “Give him to me or...well, I won’t be responsible for my actions,” the sound of that helicopter grew louder and you glanced up.

You could clearly make out the members of the local news crew, and the reporter that was hanging out the open doors. Microphone shoved in their face, more than likely dribbling nonsense. How about that, you would be on the news.  You partly wondered what they were saying: “This just in, All Might’s missing daughter on villainous rampage. Looking to kill or severely injure a certain bastard that stole her father’s attention away.” Did that sound too selfish? Well, too bad. Actually, “Hm…” you continued to look at the helicopter, perhaps you could use them to your advantage.

You chuckled softly before releasing your hold on the cop’s throat. They dropped to the ground like the pathetic scum they were. However, your eyes remained locked on the helicopter and you shifted your feet just so. Your arms were by your sides and your palms were facing down. The surge of pain came as those limbs reappeared and lifted you into the air, you stretched your legs out and maneuvered your hands. Once more using the gifted quirk to thrust yourself upward from a building roof.

Your world blurred for a moment, but you knew you were heading straight toward that helicopter and yet again used your quirk to piece through the blades of it, effectively causing it to spin out of control. You could hear alarms going off as the pilot tried to regain control and the news crew hung onto the emergency handles for dear life. Your body was thrown around like a ragdoll, however, you once more used your quirk. You positioned one of your hands so it was facing the ground below and your fingers morphed into small jagged appendages that you used for leverage to steady yourself.

In one motion you pulled your arm back and fell toward the city below. You couldn’t help but grin as you watched the helicopter spin and crash into a series of buildings. Causing several explosions, would be a shame if someone was actually in those buildings. More than likely they would have died from the impact alone. But, whether or not anyone was alive, wasn’t your concern. You dropped to the ground once again, noticing the street was now covered in dirt among the crumbled pieces of building and broken glass.

You quickly made your way to the location of the fallen helicopter, noticing the way it had landed. On its side, the metal blades bent and broke, and the wires underneath it sparked. You could make out the news reporters however, seemed they were injured but more than capable of moving. You slowly approached, watching as they helped each other out of the helicopter and onto the street. You noticed one of them was still holding the camera and you pointed your finger at them. “You…” the word left your lips ominously and it was almost entertaining to watch their heads turn and the look of fear come to their eyes when they saw you.

“Point that camera at me,” you demanded with a menacing growl as you curled your bloody hand into a fist. Perhaps you were overusing the Forced Activation Quirk, even so. You weren’t willing to die until you faced Izuku Midoriya. “NOW,” you demanded before stomping your foot, which caused the ground to shake underneath you. The news reporters cowered and you watched as the individual hesitantly hoisted the camera onto their shoulder, you could see a faint red light blinking on the side of it. Good, that meant there was a chance you could get your message through. 

“Are we live?” you questioned in a gitty fashion. “Regardless…” you pointed at the camera, “My name is Y/n, daughter of the former symbol of peace, All Might. Yes, shocking isn’t it? I am here to settle a score of sorts, take something back that was mine. I am calling you, Izuku Midoriya. Come face me or...well, perhaps I could have fun killing off more civilians, burying their bodies under the remains of the buildings. Your call…” you chuckled before signaling them to drop the camera. “Hopefully, he makes the correct choice,” you muttered before activating Airwalk, a quirk that allowed you to levitate in midair.

It was almost entertaining, looking down at everything. You chuckled as you watched the news reporters scamper to safety. You took note the police officers had vanished as well. You were more than certain no pro hero would try to interfere now that you had made it clear what you wanted, and considering the damage you already did. It would be unwise for any hero to try and step in. You had established yourself as a threat and a very fearful one at that. In the distance you could see more flashing lights and crowds of people, more than likely the authorities were closing off this section of the city. Which was an impressive move or rather a smart one.

You chuckled and reached up to adjust your mask, you wondered if All For One was proud of you. He was always so gentle with his words, always encouraging or speaking to you kindly. You wondered if there was a possibility All For One enjoyed playing the role of a parent. You knew very little about his past, apart from the fact he had a brother who was seemingly quirkless. Regardless, you had never felt more encouraged in your life and you’d make him proud. Still, you couldn’t help but feel a tad bored.

“Mm…” you reached up, tapping your cheek before taking a struggled breath. Was it growing difficult to breathe? You could feel your heart racing inside your chest, was that from adrenaline or happiness? Well, you’d find out. You could see some buildings were left undamaged, time to change that. You grinned and raised your arm, feeling your skin tingle and expand as you used Air Cannon again.

The ground vibrated and you watched as the buildings that once stood tall came crashing down. It was satisfying to watch the city fall piece by piece. You let out a sigh as you lower yourself back to the ground, taking a few steps forward. Being careful to avoid tripping over your feet or over any garbage that was in your way. You paused momentarily when you thought you heard something, at first you thought it was your imagination. But, you quickly realized it was someone calling for help. Oh dear, was someone trapped under the rubble?

A hum sounded in your throat as you followed the noise, surprised to see an opening within one of the ruined buildings. You carefully stepped over the metal rods and glass, up a pile of dirt to look inside the dimly lit opening. Sure enough, you could see someone laying on the ground. They were dripping blood from their forehead and it appeared like their leg was trapped under something, maybe a metal beam. You weren’t sure, and frankly, you didn’t care. Still, you thought it was rather foolish of them to call out to you of all people for help.

You could only chuckle, “Of course, I’ll help. Death is an easy solution,” the words came off your tongue with a purr and you lifted your arm once more. However, you paused and looked out of the corner of your eye. You could barely make out the green streaks, more so you could barely dodge. Your ears rang as Izuku screamed your name, but you were too busy literally bending over backward. Your eyes widened as the world slowed down and you could clearly see Izuku’s fist gliding past your face.

The impact that followed caused your mask to fly off. Where it landed, you didn’t particularly care. You stumbled back, your facial features twisted with disgust and anger. Your hair had bits of dirt and blood in it and hung lazily in your face. “Izuku…” you growled, though you were a little shocked to see him handling that quirk without breaking any bones. Had he finally learned how to control it? Damn, you missed a lot. 

But, you had trained under All For One himself. You had multiple quirks and there was no way Izuku could beat you, yes...One For All was powerful. But, in the wrong hands like Izuku’s, it would prove worthless in battle. This is the only thing that gave you some confidence as you walked over to him, he was on one knee with his hand pressed against the cracked pavement. You imagined several pro heroes, including Endeavor and Best Jeanist were standing around, unable to do anything but pray that Izuku could stop you.

“Did dear old father come with you?” the question left your mouth in a teasing tone. However, a moment later your hands curled into fists and Izuku stood back on his feet. You had to admit, perhaps he had gotten taller and you could clearly see he gained more muscle. “Of course he came…” you hissed out, “Anything to protect his dear little, Izuku. Yet, he would never do ANYTHING for me!!!” you screamed, ignoring the way your throat strained. You could feel your eyes water, must be the dirt.

Izuku didn’t seem entirely phased by your words and only shook his head. Lowering his defenses a moment, you could see those familiar lightning-like streaks disappear. “Y/n…” he began, his eyes focusing on the ground, more specifically your feet. “You disappeared...a year ago, I…I w-was so worried something b-bad might have...happened to y-you…” his hand reached up, pressing against his chest. However, you rolled your eyes. “You damn well remember what happened in that hospital a year ago!” you snapped, accusingly pointing your finger at Izuku.

He only narrowed his eyes, “What happened to you, Y/n?! Why did you come back?! O-Only...only to c-cause this much d-destruction?! T-This isn’t you...y-you’re a...you’re a hero!” the very word made you gag, hero. Sure, a hero whose father ignored her and chose someone else to pass his quirk to. Cared for someone else more than his own flesh and blood, someone who kept the fact you were his daughter a secret. Some hero. “Don’t insult me,” you spoke in a low voice, you highly doubted you were ever actually a hero.

Back when you could still call yourself innocent, you had only wanted to become a hero to please your father. You wanted so much to be like him and have people look up to you. Well, they looked in fear now. Either way, you were getting the attention you so desired and no doubt people would be talking about you for years to come. “I-I’m not insulting! I t-thought something bad r-really had happened! T-To see you...here...p-part of me...just w-wants to hug you and...a-and make everything better!” you let out a frustrated growl and that Forced Quirk Activation came to surface.

Your fingers morphed into those menacingly dangerous limbs and they were aimed at Izuku. However, you might have underestimated just how quick of a reaction time he had. The dagger-like limbs embedded themselves into the pavement, instead of Izuku’s body like you had originally wanted. “Hm, and here I thought you were going to make this boring!” you snapped and quickly raised your other arm, once again those limbs came out and you smiled as you watched Izuku’s eyes widen.

He had jumped to avoid your attack and now he was falling through the air. But, it almost looked as though he were hovering, more than likely thanks to that quirk of his. The one that should have been yours, perhaps that saying could finally die along with Izuku and possibly your father. If you were lucky enough for that. ‘I won’t be able to dodge in time, but I’m sure this will work. Just have to wait for the right moment…’ Izuku thought as your quirk closed its distance. Once in range, Izuku held up his hand and you could hear a snap.

“What the hell!?” your arms instantly went up, shielding yourself from the dust and glass that was a backlash result of Izuku’s action. Your foot went back, trying to steady yourself from getting blown away. Damn it, you had to do something. Regardless of where Izuku was, more than likely he had hit the ground by now which meant you had a chance of hitting him if you used Air Cannon. You cleared your mind and extended your arm out, once more that familiar painful tingle came as the pressure built.

A moment passed before you finally released it, the ground around you cracked and fell apart. The surrounding buildings already bent, came crashing to the ground and their impact only added to the strong vibrations from your quirk. Izuku had indeed touched the ground just before it began to shake violently, his only option was to jump yet again. Believing your quirk wouldn’t reach him the sky, however, he mistakenly believed that your quirk was causing earthquakes as opposed to airwaves.

He let out a cry when his body was hurled back and you could hear the loud crash as he collided with part of a building. You couldn’t help the smirk that came to your face as you walked over, seeing the dust cloud from where he had made an impact. As it cleared you could see his body lying there, his arms stretched out as well as his legs. There were some cuts on his person, and you hadn’t taken into account that Izuku wasn’t in his hero costume.

His legs were exposed because of the shorts he wore and they were covered in a thin layer of blood and dirt. “It’s a shame you had to make me go and do this Izuku Midoriya, but All For One seemed to have thought it best. Unlike my father, he’s rather encouraging when I fail. Not that I will when it comes to killing you. But first, I’d like to have a little fun,” you chuckled, despite the line of tears dripping down your cheeks. You raised your arm and your fingers morphed, this time you’d pierce him with your quirk and you’d enjoy watching his reaction.

You couldn’t tell if he was conscious or not, but it was almost pathetic how easily he seemed to be defeated and by a simple airwave, no less. Well, it didn’t matter. You smiled as you watched those jagged limbs pierce through Izuku’s flesh and it seemed to jolt him back into reality. His back arched as he let out a scream which was music to your ears. You had pierced through both his shoulders, his legs, and his stomach. Sounds painful, but this particular quirk wasn’t known to cause much, if at all, any pain.

It was simply a way to force one’s quirk to activate against their will and it was a delight watching Izuku struggle as his body illuminated and One For All appeared. Surrounding his body in that almost cosmic energy, “How does it feel, Deku? I only wish this quirk could cause you pain. Does it feel uncomfortable when your quirk is activated and you’re not the one in control? Yeah...that’s similar to how I felt throughout last year, always watching you with my father. Using the quirk he bestowed onto you instead of his own blood!” Maybe that’s another reason why All For One had chosen you because you each shared a want to have One For All to yourself.

Still, you had never once imagined you’d get so much happiness out of watching Izuku struggle, his cries growing louder. His body moving every which way despite the minor cuts that scattered across his body. It must be so uncomfortable to wiggle your body like that when on top of a pile of rubble, not that you cared. No, you were enjoying the show at least for the few blissful moments it was occurring. Your eyes narrowed when you noticed a dark circle beginning to grow on Izuku’s stomach, it almost looked like a black hole.

“What the hell…” you muttered before suddenly blackness shot out. You watched it manifest into what resembled whips and honestly, you were too shocked to process what was actually occurring. You tried retracting your quirk, but you were too slow and felt one of the whips wrap around your ankle. “Oh no…” your world blurred as you were hurled through the air, it all seemed to happen too quickly. The next thing you felt was the impact of the ground against your shoulder and a loud crack echoed. This was only followed by a surge of pain that traveled past your collarbones to the opposite side of your body. 

You grunted, your hand now clenching your aching shoulder as you struggled to get back on your feet. You clenched your jaw in an effort to keep the whimpers that threatened to escape silent. Allowing them to pass your lips would only be a sign of weakness. You took a deep breath, All For One had not gifted you the quirk of Regeneration. He stated you were strong enough on your own and that the experience without rapid healing of any kind, would only continue to strengthen your character.

He had also promised that if you got severely injured despite your best efforts, he would take care of you. Something that you appreciated, but not as much as a healing quirk. “Just...walk...it...off,” you muttered as you stumbled to turn around, the sound of your pants filling the air. Your eyes settled on Izuku as he crawled across the rubble and much like you, stood on shaky legs. “Try that a-again!” you shouted as you took a sloppy step forward. All you needed was a little adrenaline and the pain would numb on its own.

Izuku sucked his breath in and shook his head, “You need to stop t-this...Y/n. Is t-this...because of what happened with A-All Might? I get he’s your f-father and all, but…” the last thing you needed was a lecture from the King of Muttering, “Shut up!” you snapped, obviously angered at the mention of All Might. “You know nothing about my life!” hell, no one did, “You know nothing about being a true hero, I have already destroyed this city. Oh, and if you’re such a great hero,” you grinned. 

“Then tell me, why haven’t you saved that poor civilian trapped under one of these destroyed buildings?” you spoke in a mocking tone, if anything to get a reaction from the green-haired boy. “Oh wait, they could be dead. My Air Cannon could have sealed their fate…” you chuckled and slowly removed your hand from your shoulder, “Let’s see if you can actually outrun my quirk this time, Izuku Midoriya,” you found amusement in the way his eyes grew wide and his face twisted with anger. 

Yet, you continued to smile, “I’d race you...but,” you took another step forward, “no promises,” you said before activating Air Walk. Izuku almost seemed memorized as he watched you ascend into the air, but his expression quickly changed into that of horror. You had decided it was time to try combining the quirks All For One had gifted you, though it was tricky and took a lot of energy. You took a deep breath and focused, channeling Air Cannon, Forced Quirk Activation, and Rivet which allowed rivet-like growths to appear on your arm.

Your eyes focused forward, you could still see the flashing police cars off in the distance and you could make out the heroes that stood among the police officers. One of them was glowing like a torch so you assumed it could only be Endeavor and it appeared your old teacher, Shota Aizawa, was also there. They weren’t exactly the ideal audience members you wanted, but there was little to be done about it now. They had decent seats for witnessing what was about to occur.

“Ready Izuku? I’d suggest you start running...now,” you growled, as those jagged-limbs extended out from your arm and the rivets that appeared alongside it, vibrated and would also help stabilize the increased power of your Air Cannon. The pressure that was building felt wonderful and honestly, you were quite proud of yourself. The wind came and ruffled your hair, you could feel it brush off some of the dirt that stuck to your face. Your shoulder though still radiating with pain, could move. But even if it couldn’t, you’d make it move. You felt such a strange sense of happiness fill you, they say power is dangerous.

But, if it gave you this much of a high. Hell, it was worth it. Izuku, on the other hand, had great power as well. But, unlike most, he hadn’t used it for evil purposes. No, he had chosen to be a hero. Even at the cost of his own life, he’d stop whatever villain stood to harm others and at this very moment. That villain was you. “One For All! A hundred percent!” he screamed just before kicking off the ground, the pavement already cracked and abused began to cave in on itself. You could faintly hear running water and you could only assume that you had busted a water pipe when you previously used Air Cannon.

Either way, it was amusing to see Izuku blindly racing forward. He had no idea where this civilian was. But, it didn’t matter. You grinned and released your combined quirk. The air shockwave came as a powerful force of energy, ripping apart what remained of the buildings and the pavement below continued to cave in, creating an abyss of sorts. You moved forward, thankful for your position in the sky. You had lost track of Izuku, which was somewhat amazing considering he had his quirk activated. However, when it came to justice and doing what was right.

He could move as fast as he needed to, the sound of his shoes slamming against the pavement echoed in his ears  “Hey!” he shouted, “D-Does someone need help!?” his question went unanswered. Which upset him, but he couldn’t afford to give up. He knew at any moment there was a chance you’d release that quirk and then this innocent civilian would die. He wasn’t about to allow that, no. The innocent should never die, “Answer me! I’m here! I’m Deku! I’ll save you!” he shouted again, his jaw clenching as he continued to run past what used to be buildings.

His eyes looked every which way, “Hello!” he desperately called out once more before he felt the ground shake, he lifted his head and gasped. In the distance, he could see the pavement splitting apart. “I have to think fast!” he declared, “Think of where they could be, they have to be an open area within what remains of the buildings. They must be further into what’s left of the city as well,” he couldn’t waste any more time. He dug his feet into the ground and jumped into the air. This would be faster than walking and he’d have more control over where he landed.

He covered an impressive amount of distance and he could see the resulting occurrence of your quirks. What was once the street was nothing but a dark strip. He clenched his jaw and nearly stumbled when he hit the ground. It was a tad tricky to keep your balance when the ground below you continued to shake. “Can anyone hear me!?” he screamed, ignoring the way his heart rapidly echoed in his ears. “Dang it,” he took off running, “Someone, anyone!?” he called again, passing by yet another building. He recognized it, he passed it most days.

A growl rumbled in his throat, he couldn’t fully understand why you had done this. What was turning into a villain proving? Obviously nothing, but then again. Most villains aren’t meant to be understood, some are just too crazy or too damaged. Sure sometimes life deals you a bad hand, but you had to stand up again and learn how to overcome it. Like he was trying to do, he was once a quirkless boy who dreamed of becoming a hero, and now...despite all odds, he had achieved that dream. His fists tightened, “Why...why would Y/n, d-do this?” he questioned before lifting his head.

He blinked and looked around, “Hello?” he thought he heard someone. He cautiously took a step forward, the shaking was growing more violent. He was running out of solid ground. He remained quiet, listening for the sound again and sure enough, he would hear faint cries. He wasted no time in running to the source, no surprise it appeared to be coming from underneath a pile of rubble. But, it had a small opening which provided him with enough light to see the outline of someone.

By the way they were laying, Izuku immediately assumed they were trapped or too injured to move. But, a good hero always made sure of someone’s condition before going through with a rescue and evacuate mission, “Excuse me! Are you injured?!” he questioned, either way, he’d have to be careful. “I’ll get you out, don’t worry I-” before he could finish he heard the road behind him crumble. You smirked as you watched the city become no more, it was quite satisfying to a point. You willed your quirks away, revealing your torn and bloody arm. Dark circular bruises appeared where those ridges had pushed past your skin.

You paid no mind to it as you hovered just above what was once the street, nothing more than an abyss. “Hm…” you reached up, cupping your chin as you made your way to the opposite side of the city. Surely Izuku couldn’t have outrun the destruction caused by your quirk. Your eyebrows knit together, maybe surveying the area would be a wise idea. You knew that Izuku was strong in the sense that he never gave up. He’d beat himself to a bloody pulp if it meant protecting someone, but could he stand a building falling on him?

You hovered past several piles of glass and plaster, carefully looking for any sign of Izuku or that one unfortunate civilian who happened to have been in the wrong place at the wrong time. You placed your hand on your hip, despite the movement aggravating the injured side of your body. Maybe you should switch to your good side, then again. Much like Izuku, you’d let your body become nothing but a ragdoll if it ensured victory. Still, your lips formed a pout. Had Izuku actually been crushed, was he buried under one of the piles?

That was disappointing, however, a gasp escaped you when you noticed a splatter of something against a piece of what you assumed was now a broken window still. You blinked and crept closer, your eyes widened when you saw it was dark and had a red tint to it, almost like, “Blood…” you whispered in disbelief, your eyes then drifted to a piece of ripped fabric. It was hanging off a nearby rock and you recognized it as a piece of the shorts Izuku was wearing. You carefully lowered yourself onto the pile of debris, letting out a cry when you almost slipped. 

You quickly regained your balance before reaching out to take the piece of fabric in your hand. Sliding your thumb across it, feeling the rough texture of it. A frown then came, despite your injuries. You had thought this fight would be more...exciting. It clearly wasn’t, which was a disappointment. “Always the loser, huh, Deku?” you released the piece of fabric and watched as it was carried away by the wind. It was then that you heard something which caused you to raise your eyebrow. You curiously looked over your shoulder, swearing you saw the slightest of movement.

Turning around, you watched as several pebbles began to shake. Almost like an earthquake was coming, but you had already finished using your quirk. Surely there was no aftereffect, so what was causing the movement? You took a step back and suddenly something clicked. You let out a cry and crouched down as dirt, glass, and combined pieces of building flew everywhere. “Dammit!” you hissed as you stumbled over, now against the uncomfortable surface. You could feel it poking and proding your body. 

But, you kept your arms up. Covering your face and shielding your neck, your legs were curled up into your stomach. Izuku had tried a desperate move and channeled One For All to his legs, giving him an advantage as he raced forward to save the civilian trapped under the rubble. Unfortunately, just as he feared their foot was trapped underneath a metal beam. At that moment, he did the only thing he could think of. Stood above them and activated his quirk, his arms facing out and palms ready to hold back the weight as the remains of the building collapsed onto them, possibly further trapping them.

His legs were shaking and he clenched his jaw as his trembling arms continued to hold back the weight, he couldn’t afford to die at this rate. His veins were glowing that pink-red color and those green streaks that were often accompanied when he activated One For All danced around his arms. He knew it might be a bad idea, but he yet again, made a desperate move. He channeled his quirk to his dominant arm, “Detroit smash!!!” he cried, and as soon as his knuckles made contact. A blowback of power occurred. The result of which built-up pressure and finally forced it to escape.

His panting filled the air as the dust cleared and he stood tall, the civilian cradled in his arms. Though their foot was bloody and bent in a way that wasn’t humanly possible. They looked limp in his arms, however, Izuku had received most of the damage. He was covered in cuts and pieces of glass were embedded into his skin. His legs were black and blue, blood coated each one, and it was possible he had broken a bone or two. His arm was darkened in color almost as though he had gotten burned. His fingers and knuckles were the same, the skin around them dark and blood was dripping along the length of the damaged skin.

He had a cut on his lip and one that ran horizontally underneath his right eye which looked swollen. Once everything settled down and you heard that panting, you pushed yourself up. Eyes growing wide when you saw the state Izuku was in, you looked at the civilian as well. Honestly, you didn’t care what happened to them. But, knowing they would remain alive was a little disappointing. Still, a chuckle left your lips and you stood on shaky feet. A small amount of blood was dripping from your mouth, maybe you swallowed glass.

The taste of iron was a tad distracting, but you couldn’t help the wicked smirk that came to your face. “Impressive, I should have expected such from a hero,” you commented, finding some amusement in the way Izuku clenched his jaw and his eyes burned with hatred. You were kind of giddy to see such an expression and directed at you nonetheless. “Are you mad at me, Izuku?” you questioned, “Good,” you chuckled and held your good arm out to the side.

Your hand curled into a fist and you watched Izuku’s expression change. His pupils shrinking in size and his lips parting. More than likely you assumed he knew he couldn’t move too quickly, else he’d cause further injury to the civilian he held in his arms. You remained silent, in such close range any one of your quirks could potentially knock Izuku off his feet, even your original quirk. Which you had neglected in place of your new ones. But, it seemed you favored using Air Cannon more than anything and that familiar vibration coursed through your arm. 

The smirk on your face only grew when Izuku took a step back, clearly, he knew by now there was no trying to talk his way out of this. “Are you happy this is what your actions caused, Izuku Midoriya? Because of you my fath-'' suddenly a sound echoed through the air, one that filled you with disgust and anger. Yet, a sense of familiarity and memories. Talk about perfect timing, you had hoped your father would make an appearance. Seemed whatever God or otherwise chose to answer your prayer was being rather generous. “Y/N!!!” came All Might’s voice, though it was hardly intimidating.

You were well aware your father had lost all use of One For All, the result was him remaining in his true form. That of a skinny, weak, old man. You stood there a moment and glanced to the side, part of you didn’t even want to look at your father. Feeling as though such an action would cause you to become nauseous, but you knew you had to. Especially if you wished to cause some well-deserved harm. “Hmph,” a soft growl rumbled in your throat before you lowered your arm and turned around. Sure enough, there he was. Toshinori Yagi, previously known as All Might.

The former symbol of peace, your father. You said nothing, only crossed your arms. A growl escaped you as you narrowed your eyes and fought the urge to smash your fist right into his face. You could hear movement behind you, more than likely Izuku running off to protect that no good civilian. But, surely he wouldn’t leave All Might alone. Your father was quirkless while you had multiple quirks. Fairness didn’t come into the equation here. Yet, you could see your father’s eyes widen. “It is you…” he whispered as he looked at you from head to toe.

You were covered in dirt and blood, your clothes were ripped. Your hair was messy and stiff. Bruises littered one arm and fresh blood continued to drip from your mouth which in a way, ironically was something that happened to your father frequently. You assumed it was due to that stomach injury he had received years ago when he faced down All For One. Still, you rolled your eyes. “Back from the dead,” you mocked and All Might frowned, “Y/n...I…” you growled and closed the distance between All Might and yourself.

You partly wondered how he had gotten this far considering the damage you had done to the road. But, you knew as a previous pro hero, he had his ways. Both of you were standing near the edge of what was once the road. One misstep and you’d fall into nothingness. “You can take your apology and shove it up your ass!” you snapped, acting like an angry child and essentially you were just that. Angry, pissed off, loathing the very concept of your father’s existence.

“I don’t care what you have to say, I only care about ending you. But, before I do. I want to know, did it hurt?” you questioned, however, your father looked confused. You had to admit, you were under the impression most were intimidated to be standing in front of a villain. Your father, however, continued to stand tall. You somehow knew he wouldn’t back down unless you forced him to and you’d get to that soon enough. “Did it hurt when you thought I disappeared? Tell me, did you think about that night? How you always favored Izuku over me!? Do you wish you could have hugged me instead? Do you ever regret treating me like shit!?” you snapped, your bloody spit flying as you grew angrier.

All Might held his hands up, “Y/n...of course I-” you interrupted him, “You wanted to keep me a secret from everyone, right!? Didn’t want your heroic name tainted because you had a bastard child, is that it!?” you growled, your teeth scraping together and you hoped your glare would physically make him burst into flames. Yet, you watched as his eyes softened and he lowered his hands. He glanced to the side and silence filled the air, “WELL!?” you snapped, clearly wanting an answer. Instead, you heard him sigh and he slowly looked back at you.

“I...I was never ashamed of you, Y/n. I…” his response made your stomach twist and you nearly gagged, his words were sickening. “You’re so full of shit,” you said with a low chuckle, “It’s funny, I never thought the former symbol of peace would be a liar. How does it feel, father? To know this destruction, all of this!” you exclaimed as you held your arms out, hands and fingers curling in an almost happy motion. “Is because of you. I should have had One For All, I should have been your successor. But, you never...you never wanted that did you!? No, instead you chose a pathetic little weakling to carry your precious quirk. Well, you know what. I’m here to kill him,” All Might’s eyes widened.

“Oh, here’s something else you might find shocking, I hope it hurts. I didn’t just disappear from the hospital, no. In fact, long before that. I had gotten a mysterious text, somehow the person who sent the text knew I was your daughter. One thing led to another and I came to find out, your sworn enemy. You know, the man you inflicted pain upon, took away his pride and his eyes. Came to me,” you saw a flicker of hate shine in your father’s eyes. “He saw potential in me, where you didn’t. Promised I could become something that the world would look up to, he believed in my skills, unlike you. He even asked me to be his successor which I gladly am!” you growled before bending your knees, your tongue came out to swipe across your lips.

Though you tasted dirt and iron, “Now that you’re a quirkless loser, I think this will be easy,” you activated your original quirk, it was nothing compared to the more powerful quirks one could be born with. But, it was strong enough to get the job done and you wanted the satisfaction of being able to kill your father with your own power. Hear that jawbone snap and watch as his blood spilled. With that blissful thought, you kicked off the ground. Bending your body so you could perform a direct uppercut to his jaw, it seemed All Might was still in shock. Which meant, he had no defense.

He could only accept the fact that karma was finally here to bite him in the ass. You smiled as you got closer, hand raised and fingers curled tightly together. But, as usual, nothing was ever that easy. You could hear a scream, and just before you turned your head to look. You saw Izuku’s fist come, “Leave him alone!” he cried and you quickly turned your body in an effort to stop him. Instead of your fist reaching All Might, it collided with Izuku’s. You could feel your knuckles snap and break, which caused pain to shoot through your already damaged arm and shoulder.

You growled, feeling the impact begin to force you back. Your feet were being forcibly moved along the limited ground despite the fact you were desperately digging them into the earth. “Stop. It,” you demanded with a hiss, you knew any further and you wouldn’t have solid ground. Your eyes were half-lidded and through the swirling debris, you could make out his facial expression. No surprise, he was pretty pissed. “You’re not going to hurt him or anyone else!” Izuku screamed and your eyes widened when he pulled his arm back.

You cursed yourself for not dodging or at least attempting to create distance, for that fist came back and collided with your face. Your head forcibly turned to the side and your jaw, along with a few select teeth broke. This only caused more blood to fill your mouth. A cry of pain left you, only to be swallowed as you choked on the blood that found its way down your throat. The next thing that occurred was your body flying, only to be stopped when your back collided with the sharp jagged edge of what was once the street.

Blood dripped down your chin, thick lines making their way down your neck and soaking into the collar of your tattered shirt. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you then fell forward, your body disappearing into the darkness. You felt the impact of several metal pipes hit your body, it almost seemed like they were working together. Every hit to your body caused an agonizing surge of pain and you partly wished you had just died. A weak cry escaped you when you finally hit solid ground.

You had fallen into a puddle of water and you could hear the sound of mice squeaking in this otherwise quiet place. You groaned in pain, feeling every part of your body ache. You were too afraid to move, knowing the slightest of movement would cause a violent wave of pain that was enough to paralyze you as a whole. You knew your jaw was broken, you doubted it was still connected on the side Izuku had punched. Blood continued to pour from your mouth and you swore one of your ribs had pierced through your lung.

Every time you tried to breathe, you ended up weakly coughing blood back up. Another groan came and you quietly spoke, “D-Did...I...do...good?” the question went unanswered and darkness clouded your vision. On the surface, All Might was still in shock. “Y/n!” he cried as he ran to the edge of the caved-in road, it was almost like a sinkhole. It would be hard to spot a human down below, but All Might still tried to make out your figure. He was clearly angry, his small skinny body trembling as he curled his fists and turned to face Izuku.

“What the hell were you thinking, kid!?” he snapped, which confused Izuku, “I…I was only trying to p-protect you, All Might. She w-was going to hit you and-” All Might shook his head, “That’s not how you handle a situation like that, if I was her target-ah. Forget it,” he growled before pointing, “Go down there and find her!” he snapped and Izuku took a step back. He was almost afraid All Might would hit him if he didn’t follow through with the order. He opened his mouth, about to speak his opinion when a dark and eerie chuckle came.

All For One was watching the whole spectacle from a distance. He felt rather amused during the first half of the battle, he was quite pleased to know how much pain and damage your body could take. How well the quirks he gave you were adjusting to your body, though he believed you had poorly chosen when to use your quirks and for what purpose. Nothing more training couldn’t fix. Still, All For One used his Warping quirk to appear before All Might and Izuku. Foolishly, Izuku activated his quirk. Ready to jump and attack, but All Might put his arm out and pressed it against Izuku’s chest.

A fair enough motion to get his point across, “Seems you’re a little shocked, All Might. I must say, I expected a little more fight out of your successor. Of course, I suppose enough of a punishment for you is not only seeing your successor fail just as you have failed but knowing your own selfish actions caused your only daughter to turn against you,” All Might lowered his brows, his lips turned in a frown. Yes, there were many ways he could have been a better father to you. Showed you he cared and took your feelings into consideration. But, nothing would change the result of this.

Izuku growled, desperately fighting the urge to jump and start another fight. Despite his body already being damaged, everything made sense now. All For One corrupted your mind, made you turn against your loved ones. His jaw tightened and his fists shook as he lowered his head, “All Might...I c-can’t forgive him, he...he poisoned Y-Y/n’s mind!” he hissed, feeling his anger slowly begin to consume him, and while All Might agreed. It didn’t appear like All For One had come to cause more damage, more than likely he was only retrieving you. 

It made your father sick thinking what further corruption All For One would expose you to. It hurt him, knowing he couldn’t save you. Knowing he had no choice in the matter of your fate, “I know…” he whispered sadly as he lowered his arm, believing Izuku would behave himself. “Don’t worry, you’ll see, Y/n again. Very soon,” his words almost seemed like a threat. Another warp gate appeared beside All For One and Izuku had already assumed the villain had collected you. 

He screamed out when the evil man disappeared into the darkness of that warp gate and All Might immediately restrained him. Wrapping his arms around the green-haired boy, though it wasn’t an easy task. “Calm down! You’re already injured enough. There is nothing we do for now,” he tried to reason, but Izuku continued to carry on. Violent tears streaming down his face, yet there was a hint of determination shining in his eyes. He would save you, he would make this right. 

You could feel yourself floating, at first you assumed you were dead. However, you could still wiggle your fingertips which you took as a good sign. But, you still felt weighed down by something. Slowly you opened your eyes, seeing your world was tinted blue and air bubbles floated past your vision. Your hair was floating in separate strands around you and it quickly clicked you were submerged in water. You reached up, touching the mask that was strapped to your face and your fingertips brushed the plastic tube that came along with it. 

More than likely that was the source providing you with oxygen. You then looked at your hand, noticing it was scarred up. Your arm seemed to be the same, long jagged dark lines ran from your wrist to your inner elbow. You assumed a massive amount of scar tissue made up your shoulder, but at least the pain you remember having before blacking out was gone. You weren’t sure if that was something you should be grateful for. 

You glanced around, you could make out several machines on the outside of the glass. Each one flashed with a particular sequence of lights, which confused you. However, the most familiar thing was a small television in the corner of the room. You could see shots of the damage you had done to the city, you couldn’t read the headline that flashed on the bottom of the screen. But, your eyes widened when you saw the scene switch to your father. 

You leaned forward, pressing one hand to the glass as you watched your father speak. He looked tired, shocked, and utterly disappointed. You could tell there was hurt in his eyes, well...it was what he deserved, right? You leaned back, nearly choking on your own gasp when you heard the sound of a heavy door open. You could hear chattering, but to you in your water prison, it sounded like nothing but water currents. You saw two figures come into view, one was short and wore a white lab coat, and the other you recognized as All For One.

“How pathetic, All Might begging for his daughter back,” he hissed, clearly disgusted at such a thing. It was amusing to a point when a hero fell, but now it was just pitiful. He crossed his arms before turning to look at you and for some reason, you felt a small amount of fear consume you. He walked over and pressed a hand against the glass that separated you. “Don’t worry now, my beautiful successor. You did well, I am very proud of you. Don’t be scared now, your body should be stable enough to handle more quirks,” he leaned closer, and his shadow cast over you.

Though his words were unrecognizable to you, the feeling of uncertainty made your stomach twist. “Then you’ll succeed where I failed, All Might won his battle against me, yes. But you, you will win against his successor and pave the path for a better world.” you shivered when he tapped the glass and turned away from you. Becoming All For One’s successor was not an easy task, you knew this from the start. But part of you couldn’t help but wonder what step was next and if you truly wanted it.  

#all for one x reader #bnha fanfiction #bnha x reader #bnha x y/n