#come to heaven with me isn't save the world with me and I think that's what he'll be going for in Season three

[winepresswrath]

The thing about Crowley is that he already tried fighting* the system and the end result was his fellow rebels making a new system suspiciously similar to the old system with torture pits and demotivational posters in place of the aggressive hypocrisy and kardashiancore interior decorating. And then after that he decided to fight the apocalypse and the apocalypse thwarted itself with minimal involvement required from him. His biggest contribution was fucking up a simple handoff completely accidentally. His apparent belief that it'll all sort itself out without him or it won't and either way his involvement will be largely irrelevant to everyone but himself is pretty well founded. I'm sure by the end of season three he'll have learned a valuable lesson about how admitting that you want to make positive contributions to the world is something you can do on your own terms and not simply an exercise in opening yourself up to god's preordained judgement and hell's torture pits and but he's old and tired and has probably never been kissed let him have a very specific vision for his retirement.

*ok his version of fighting was probably just asking a lot of very annoying questions and then semi-accidentally joining a rebellion.

#good omens #also while I am being a bit rude Aziraphale wasn't exactly like gosh how wonderful I can go back #and fix everything his response as a tea drinker was #there's no coffee in heaven I'm not going until the metatron told him there could be Crowley in heaven and then he got very exited #I don't think he was thinking about the apocalypse in anything but the most general terms until #the metatron mentioned the second coming to him #do not get it twisted he wants to make a difference he's very excited for systemic reform he believes that things can be better! #but like. he got giddy for standing in the light of god's love with his not-boyfriend he was picturing an eternity of Crowley and thinking #that he could live without sushi #and Sondheim if he could have that #he's down horrendous he's just also delusional about his favourite person's feelings and perspective #tbh I think this is interesting specifically because Aziraphale had very much not made his save the world with me pitch yet #Crowley did it in season one #Crowley also knows the angels are gunning hard for the apocalypse again during their big fight but doesn't bring it up #Aziraphale knows in general terms they'll probably try again but it's not really on his mind #come to heaven with me isn't save the world with me and I think that's what he'll be going for in Season three

[forineffablereasons]

Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever.

I think the entirely of Crowley and Aziraphale's interactions in the Final Fifteen™️can be summed up by the idea that they are talking past one another, failing to fully understand each other, but I want to talk about this line in particular. This isn't a full analysis of the scene - just this isolated bit.

Crowley: ...If Gabriel and Beelzebub can do it, go off together, then we can. We don't need Heaven, we don't need Hell, they're toxic. We need to get away from them, just be an us. You and me, what do you say? Aziraphale: Come with me. To Heaven. I'll run it, you can be my second-in-command. We can make a difference. Crowley: You can't leave this bookshop. Aziraphale: Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever. Crowley: No. No, don't suppose it does.

As methods of occult/ethereal communications go, the metaphor is quite versatile.

Crowley is saying: stay here with me. We have this enclave. We can be together properly now - stay here with me. Never mind that they have not actually made any progress on this in the last four-ish years since the end of the world. Never mind that Crowley is so stagnant that four years after the end of the world he's still living in his car.

Keep in mind that Aziraphale didn't have the benefit of Nina and Maggie's intervention - Aziraphale doesn't see this as a confession under Crowley's own initiative, he sees it as a response to what Aziraphale is saying. Aziraphale says, let's go make a difference, and Crowley is sort of forced into taking this position as an alternative offer - to Aziraphale, it looks almost like a temptation. Nothing changed in the last four years, but now that Heaven needs you (and we must give Aziraphale the benefit of his belief that Heaven truly does need him, even though this is clearly a manipulation), I'm ready to move forward, don't you want to stay, don't you want to deny Heaven and exist with our heads in the sand?

"Oh, Crowley," Aziraphale says. "Nothing lasts forever."

To Crowley, who is offering himself and this enclave, this bit of existence that can just be theirs - nothing lasts forever is an obvious smackdown: not even us.

That's not what Aziraphale is saying, though. What Aziraphale is saying is, we can't live like this forever. If we want to protect it, we have to change. Nothing lasts forever isn't a betrayal or a resignation - it's a sacrifice. Aziraphale cares so much about Earth, about fixing Heaven, and about Crowley himself that he's willing to give up the bookshop and their enclave on Earth in order to save it.

They cannot just maintain the status quo. It's been four years since Armageddon and nothing has changed, and keeping on ignoring Heaven and Hell didn't work! It didn't work! They were on their own and here's Heaven and Hell again, in their business, dragging Crowley back to Hell, dragging Aziraphale back into Heaven's politics. Four years was all they got. Four years, and they were under threat, risking each other, risking their very existences. They can't sit in their enclave and pretend it won't happen again because it absolutely will.

Aziraphale spends a lot of this series burying his head in the sand. If he can just hide Gabriel, everything will be fine! (It won't - he'll still have Gabriel.) If he can just make Maggie and Nina fall in love, everything will be fine! (It won't - he'll still have Heaven and Hell waiting in the wings for the next suspicious event.) If he can just get everyone at the Jane Austen Ball, if he can just keep the demons out, if he can just ignore it, it will go away! If he can make the participants know the steps to the dance and if he can control the lingo, he can create a new fantasy world for them all to live in and everything will be fine!

It won't. Aziraphale isn't in control. Aziraphale can't stop this. Aziraphale can't protect himself, and he can't protect Crowley to the point where he has to let Crowley leave him and work a plan on his own. He's a principality, and he can't protect the things and the people he loves.

Then the Metatron walks in, makes a point of validating all the things Aziraphale loves - coffee (food/drink), Crowley (your demon can recognize me even when these angels can't), the shop (do you need to take anything with you? I've made sure the shop will be safe), separates Crowley from Aziraphale - Crowley, Aziraphale's guiding light in all those minisodes, Crowley, the one being Aziraphale trusts - and then.

And the Metatron offers Aziraphale the control he's been missing all season.

Nothing lasts forever. We can't survive in this enclave forever. If we stay here, it will all end. If we stay here, I can't protect you, or humanity, or any of it. I have to try, we have to try, because no one else will, and I'm willing to give up my freedom and my bookshop if it means I can save everything. I want to save it with you, I want you to be with me, I need you, I need us, but--

If I can save you, even if it costs me us, at least you'll have survived.

If that's the price, well. Nothing lasts forever.

#good omens s2 spoilers #go s2 spoilers #go s2 #good omens #ineffable husbands

[amuseoffyre]

I've been rolling around in Good Omens thoughts again and a gifset made something jump out at me.

This is where the Metatron is going to come undone. He's got the same binary thinking as Heaven. Good or bad. Heaven or hell. Coffee or death. So predictable.

It reminded me of the scene in S1 when Aziraphale is confronted by the angels and they tell him "it's time to choose a side" and this is where it gets chewy and delicious.

Aziraphale points out "there obviously has to be two sides. That's the whole point, so people can make choices. That's what being human means - choices, but that's for them. Our job as angels should be to keep all this working so they can make choices".

He's already arguing for humanity all the way through S1, which is a problem, but it's something he's done consistently. Not questioning. Very much, not questioning. Just... offering suggestions. So this isn't news. He's even made these kind of suggestions to the Metatron before, so not new.

At the end of S1, Crowley points out that he thinks the real 'big one' is coming "Heaven and Hell against humanity". Aziraphale has been sitting with that knowledge for years. He and Crowley have been dancing on the edge of disaster with Heaven and Hell turning up whenever they wanted, invading their space, demanding their time and compliance even though they are seen as rogue agents.

Everything in S2 is Aziraphale trying to maintain the veneer of everything is fine while still dealing with the terror of it all falling apart. The "or death" has been hanging over them the whole time. He saw the attempted execution. He's been told by Heaven that Crowley is under threat.

But the thing about Aziraphale is that he never ever does the predictable thing. Yes, he agreed to go back to Heaven. Yes, the Metatron leveraged Crowley's safety against him to guarantee it. The statement of "I don't want to go back to Heaven" turning around as soon as Crowley's safety is brought into it. Yes, he'll be the Archangel.

But this is the angel who gave away his flaming sword and lied to God's face. This is the angel who interfered in a bet between God and Satan to save the lives of three children. This is the angel who collaborated with a demon so they could have more down time. This is the angel who was swayed towards saving the world because he loves his life there and all his favourite foods and music and indulgences. This is the angel who flipped the bird and dive-bombed out of Heaven to possess a medium and fly a scooter to the end of the world.

Whatever the Metatron thinks he's done by separating Crowley and Aziraphale, he has no idea what he's unleashed. Crowley's bee metaphor comes to mind here. Angels are fiercely protective of Heaven but once you're inside? Well, that's another story. Aziraphale may look like a bee, but he hasn't been a bee for a long, long time. They knew it at his trial.

And Aziraphale can't say he didn't warn them:

"So you're probably thinking if he can do this, I wonder what else he can do and very, very soon, you're all going to get the chance to find out"

Heaven's got a big storm coming and they let it right in through the front door.

#good omens #good omens meta #Aziraphale

[sopebubbles]

Master List

Fourteen

Synopsis: in a world where alphas, betas, and omegas live along side modern humans as second class citizens, you've fallen through the cracks of a society that wants to take everything wonderful from you. Luckily a timely encounter with the boys just might save your life.

Chapter summary: Your second heat with the pack begins, and Yoongi, Jimin and Hoseok promise to make it better than any before.

Warnings: talks of past trauma, nightmares, SMUT (I honestly didn't think this was gonna happen), penetrative sex (female and male), use of sex toys, unprotected sex, LOTS of kissing and touching, lots of pet names.

WC: 14k

"Mmm, you're in preheat," Yoongi said against your neck. He could smell you getting sweeter and sweeter. He'd noticed it a couple of hours ago, but let you keep sleeping. His heart dropped when he felt you tense up beneath him, knowing you were going into distress, souring just a little. "It will be alright, princess. We're here to help." He did his best to soothe you, but when you remained still, he pulled you back against him, away from Jimin. 

"Jimin, go get Hobi," he instructed, and the beta got up without asking any questions. Yoongi rolled you over so he could see your face even though you wouldn't look at him. He smoothed your hair back as he spoke softly. "We should have done this sooner, but we're going to talk with Hobi and make a plan. Everything will be alright."

He began to feel a little panic when you didn't respond, and he wondered if maybe you didn't trust him completely yet. Maybe you were still afraid of him a little. Maybe you feared that he wasn't going to keep the promises he had made you on the day you finally became his. His heart broke a little, although he could never blame you. But he didn't know what he would do if you kicked him out to go through your heat alone. He couldn't let that happen. He'd lose his mind.

"I don't understand why she's so broken up about it," Jimin heard Namjoon say as he walked down the stairs. "If I were her I'd be thrilled the bastard is dead."

"Because she's a good girl who doesn't want to be a murderer," Hoseok replied. "I'm sure she'd be happy if she didn't feel responsible. I wish she could see that she isn't."

All heads turned toward Jimin as he entered the kitchen where they all sat, drinking tea, or in Jungkook and Namjoon's case, beer. 

"How is she doing?" Tae asked urgently. 

"She feels like shit. But we have a different problem. Hobi, Yoongi wants you upstairs."

Hobi stood up and set his mug heavily on the table. "What's wrong?"

Jimin frowned. "She's in pre-heat," he replied before turning to go back up the stairs. 

"Taehyung, I need you to go to the grocery store to stock up. Take Namjoon with you," Hobi said before following Jimin. 

"But-"

"No buts," he said curtly and disappeared.

"I'll go, if you don't want to," Jin told Namjoon softly.

"Or the two of you can go and I'll stay here," Taehyung offered, not at all wanting to leave the house while you were becoming more vulnerable by the second. 

Namjoon sighed. "If the two of us go we won't come back with any of the things we actually need. And Hobi probably needs you here, Jin. It's fine. I'll go."

Jimin knocked on the door before opening it, startling both you and Yoongi. When you saw Hobi behind him, you both sat up to be able to talk to them properly. He sat on the edge of the bed and touched his hand to your forehead. 

"You're hot as hell, but you smell like heaven. How are you feeling, pup?" He asked, but you merely shrugged. 

"Hobi, Y/N told me a while ago that she doesn't like dealing with her heats. She said they hurt. I know we should have worked it out earlier, but I was hoping you could help us come up with a plan or something. You're the expert and I…"

Yoongi didn't need to finish his sentence for Hoseok to know just how lost he felt. It was clear in his eyes, though he was trying to hide it. He looked from your alpha to you and smiled. "Heats aren't bad if you manage them right, pup. We'll get through it fine. Can you tell me what you normally do for your heats?"

You shook your head and pulled your knees toward your chest. "Nothing. I haven't been having them for a couple years. I don't know."

"Well, what was your best heat like?"

You looked at him blankly. "My best heat was the one I had last time. With you."

His heart ached. That couldn't be true. The struggle he'd watched you go through couldn't have been the best of an experience that Hoseok often found actually quite enjoyable.

He swallowed, steeling himself to dig into what he guessed was going to be a lot of trauma. "Sweetheart, can you tell me about your first heat?"

You broke eye contact with him, lowering your gaze to your knees where the old jeans you were still wearing were worn thin, ready to rip apart. You shook your head. 

Yoongi rubbed a hand down your spine, still tense, and begged. "Please, princess. I know it might hurt, but we can't make it better until we know what's wrong."

You breathed in deep and pushed it out. Your voice cracked when it first came out. "I was sixteen when I had my first. I didn't know what was happening at first. No one had ever told me what it would be like, and I was so old, I thought at that point I was a beta, like Eli." The words caught around the lump in your throat, but you swallowed it down. "When my m-mother found me. Sh-she she dragged me from the nest I made." You hadn't realized you'd begun to cry until Jimin took one of your balled-up fists in his hand to relax it. "She and my father took me out to the back of the farm and left me outside the property in the woods. It was the last time I saw them."

Hoseok wanted to tear them apart with his teeth, but it wasn't about them right now. He wiped your cheeks. "That must have been very scary. You were so brave. What did you do?"

You sniffed. "I was pretty out of it. I stayed in the woods until it was over because I didn't want s-someone else to find me," you hiccuped. "There were other animals out there and–"

"Y/N," Hoseok interrupted you. His voice was so firm you had to instantly look him in the eyes. "You are not an animal. No matter what they told you, you're a person. Got it?" He watched your eyes glass over before you nodded. "Sorry, pup. I didn't mean to sound so angry. I'm not…I'm not mad at you." You lowered your eyes again, and he couldn't help but feel bad and wonder if he was helping at all. "I'm sorry. Go on."

You cleared your throat. "After it was over, I hitchhiked to the nearest city, an hour or so away. I was on the streets for about six months, so like two heats bc they were farther apart then. You can imagine how that went." 

Hoseok did his very best not to imagine it. Jimin's grip on your hand tightened as he recalled the night they found you, what they stopped and what he feared could have happened. He never thought you might have already lived the worst things he could think of. Yoongi on your other side was deadly silent.

"Anyway, then I met Sebastian and Roxy, and I think Yoongi told you about what that was like already." You looked at Yoongi for the first time since you'd started telling your story, but he didn't look at your face. When you looked back at Hoseok, he nodded. "When I went to jail, they made me take heat suppressants and since then I've pretty much stayed on them. It's been…better."

Hobi swallowed down the bile rising in his throat as he tried to look for something to say. Before he could think of anything, Jimin spoke. 

"Y/N-ie, can I hold you?" He asked softly.

You looked at him in surprise. "Y-you want to hold me?"

He nodded. "I think it will make you–no, I don't know if it will actually make you feel better, but if it's alright with you, I'd like to try. I think it would make me worry less," he admitted. "It's okay if you don't want to. I won't force–"

You stopped him by moving closer, between his legs. "It always makes me feel better. And I don't want you to worry."

For a brief moment, Yoongi forgot his anger and concern as he watched Jimin wrap his arms around your waist and you leaned your head on his shoulder. He almost smiled. Then he looked at Hoseok, who had finally composed himself. 

"Pup," he started softly, pulling your attention away from Jimin's collar to look up at him, but you didn't move an inch. You looked tiny in Jimin's arms, and something about it made his heart swell. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sad you had to go through all of that alone. I promise that for the rest of your life, anyone who tries to hurt you like that will answer to me personally." His eyes slid briefly over to your alpha and back to you, but Yoongi didn't seem bothered by the threat. "That's not what heats are supposed to be like, and I'm going to make sure that you can see that someday. I know it won't be perfect this time, but I think we can make it better."

"How?" You asked softly. 

"For starters, the four of us will be the only people allowed in this room. I'll do what I can to make sure you don't even smell the other alphas, and they won't bother you. Would that make you feel safer?" 

"You'll be in here with me?" You looked at your alpha. 

"We're not going to let you be alone this time, princess. We'll be here to make sure you stay hydrated and eat when you can. We can help keep you calm and make you as relaxed as possible," he said.

"But what about…will you…will we?"

He shook his head. "I made you a promise, pup, and I'm going to keep it. I'm not going to breed you. I'm just going to keep you company."

"But what if I…" You shrank into Jimin's chest and picked at your nails. "When I'm like that, sometimes I–" they all waited patiently while you tried to get the words out. "Sometimes I want it, even if I think I don't want it. It's like my body just…" your voice was strangled by the shame in your throat. 

"That's completely normal, sweetheart," Hobi told you. "That's the whole point of being in heat. Everyone wants a knot. It's nothing to be ashamed of."

Still, you flushed. "Then why don't you want to?" You asked Yoongi.

"I do!" He answered quickly and then tried to swallow his enthusiasm. "I mean, it's not that I don't want to. I don't want to, but not because I don't want you. I want you so much, princess, honestly. But I want you to feel safe and comfortable and to trust me way more than I want to satisfy some basic instinct for either of us."

"You're still attracted to me, right?" You asked in the shyest voice he's ever heard. 

"Yes, princess. We talked about that," he grinned. "But that doesn't mean I need to breed you. Even if you beg for it."

"There are other ways to satisfy those needs, if they become overwhelming," Hobi interjected to point out. 

You turned your attention back to him curiously. "What do you mean?"

"Typically parents don't really want their adolescent omegas to go around breeding before they're ready. My parents let me use other methods, like plugs and dildos to scratch that itch. It's not the same, but it helps a little with the discomfort," he explained. 

"Hobi, I don't know," Yoongi responded when you curled into Jimin's chest to hide your face. 

"It's just a suggestion. It might help. I agree that you shouldn't be giving her your knot this time around, but she shouldn't have to suffer." He took your hand and made you look at him. "You've been taught that your body is something you should be ashamed and afraid of, but it isn't. The things you feel are normal and natural. It's okay to feel wary of an alpha. The two of you are still getting to know each other. But it's time for you to stop being afraid of yourself. Understand?"

You nodded slowly. "Can Yoongi and Jimin still like, hold me and kiss me? Or is that off limits too?" 

Yoongi chuckled. "Of course. You can have all the cuddles and kisses you want, princess," he told you, stroking your cheek. 

Hoseok nodded thoughtfully and sighed. "If there's nothing else, then I think you should go get a shower. Cool, not too hot or cold. A hot shower will pull you down faster, but a cold one will throw you off balance. After, you can put on something soft and new. I washed it all and put it in the wardrobe. If you feel up to it afterwards, then you can come down and eat with us. If not, I'll send the boys up with something."

You agreed and let Jimin help you off the bed, stumbling a little into him and finding that your coordination was already suffering. Hoseok gathered up the blankets in your nest.

"Jimin, you'd better go clean up, too. I'll go get some things washed and ready. I'll get Jin to order some pizza for dinner," Hobi said as he left the room.

"I've got to go out for a bit," Yoongi said, walking out after him. 

Your soft whine stopped him in his tracks. "Do you have to work tonight?"

He looked softly down at you. "No, princess. I was off until Wednesday anyway, but I'll be calling in sick until it's over."

"You're coming back, right? I-I didn't scare you away?" The tangible fear in your voice shattered the last intact pieces of his heart. He walked back to where you stood in your doorway and placed his hand on your shoulder. 

"Of course not. I'm just going to get a couple things for you. I'll be back in less than an hour. I promise." He kissed you on the forehead to seal it. You whispered an okay and watched him follow Hobi down the stairs before you walked across the hall to the bathroom.

"Are you really going to leave your omega when she's in pre-heat?" Hoseok asked when he heard the bathroom door close and they had reached the first floor.

"I have to. We're going with your plan, so I need to get her some things. Clock's ticking," Yoongi said as he searched around for his wallet and keys.

"Tae's already out. I can call him and have him make a stop," Hoseok said casually as he walked toward the laundry room.

"Taehyung is not buying my omega a knot plug," Yoongi said firmly and loudly. A little too loudly. In the kitchen, Jungkook choked on his drink and sputtered onto Jin.

"A what?" The beta asked as he wiped at his face. 

"Don't worry about it," Hoseok said as he walked by. "Go on, Yoongi. I won't waste your time riling you up for my own amusement tonight. Hurry back."

Yoongi grumbled something unintelligible before he left the room.

"What was that about?" Jin asked after the front door closed. "Why does she need a knot plug when she has her alpha now?"

"She's not ready for all that," Hobi said softly. "And that's all anyone needs to know."

"Is it going to be like last time?" Jungkook wondered. 

"For the four of you, pretty much. I'm expecting you to show some self-control. I'll be helping them as much as I can, so I won't be able to keep you in line. I don't want you or Namjoon so much as looking at her door. Not that it will be much of a problem for you," Hobi mumbled.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jin asked.

"I know you don't like her much. Hopefully that makes it easier to stay away."

Jin sighed. "I don't have anything against her, honestly. I'm staying away for Yoongi, and because I know she's scared. Joon–well, l don't know how he feels about it, but you don't have to worry about him. I'd worry about Taehyung if I were you."

"Why?"

"He's sniffing around her. I know you've noticed."

Hoseok shrugged. "Tae likes her. He won't do anything about it though. He knows she's fragile, and he won't do anything until she wants him to. He's harmless."

"If you say so," Jin shrugged. "Do you want me to stick around this week, just in case?"

"That's not necessary. We can handle it. I would bet on you needing to make time for me by the end of the week, if it's anything like last time," Hobi told him and the alpha nodded, trying not to look too excited about it.

When Yoongi returned forty-two minutes later, you and Jimin were both sitting at the kitchen table eating pizza, dressed in silky soft pajamas. Hoseok stood behind your chair, gently combing out your hair while Jungkook stood over Jimin with a towel, wringing the water from his hair. But what struck Yoongi was how happy the two of you looked. Jimin must have scented you a bit because that was the only time you ever looked so giddy. The beta, too, looked very giggly, but Jungkook always had the ability to make him that way. 

"Did I miss something?" Yoongi asked after he stashed the bag he'd brought in by the stairs instead of bringing it into the kitchen. 

"Nothing really. Just some sweet smelling pups," Hobi smiled. Yoongi could tell he was living a dream come true with your hair in his hands. 

"My sweet smelling pups," Yoongi responded. 

"Yeah, yeah." Hobi bent down to your ear, but spoke loudly enough for all to hear, "Alpha's so territorial." 

You swallowed, but couldn't hide the heat in your cheeks. Yoongi replied with a non threatening growl.

"Yoon, your hair is wet, too," Jungkook said, walking over with the towel he had used on Jimin. 

"I'm okay, Kookie." He ducked the towel coming for his head. 

Jungkook shushed him. "Stubborn alpha."

"Is it raining out?" Jin asked. 

"Pouring. It's supposed to storm off and on all night. You can't hear the thunder?"

They all shook their heads. They'd been laughing since the pizza got here. Over nothing even. It seemed like your scent in the air had loosened them all up, almost like they were intoxicated by you. Your sweet pheromones had become like a social lubricant, making everything easier between all of you. Something sick and familiar twisted in Yoongi's gut. He should be happy everything was so harmonious—and part of him certainly was—but it grated against his own jealousy that wanted to hide you away for himself, just a little longer. 

"Come eat, alpha," your sweet voice broke through, and his dark clouds cleared. "You can sit by me," you added shyly, as if he wouldn't want to. 

Without giving a second thought to the feelings of a moment ago, he did as you suggested and sat to eat. He'd need every calorie to put every bit of energy into looking after you. You pulled your chair closer to his and he looked down at you surprised. 

"I'm glad you came back," you whispered while the others talked. 

"I told you I would," he replied. 

"I know, and I tried really hard to believe it. I was just scared and I…i don't want to lose you," you admitted. 

Yoongi gave you a tight smile as he stroked your hair. "You won't. No matter what happens, in the next few days or in the future, I'll be right here. I'll be yours. You don't have to worry."

He placed a gentle kiss on your lips and pulled away to see you smiling, a little dopey, your eyes shining bright. "Okay."

You let him eat, but stuck close by his side, swatting at Jimin's hands when he tried to pull you away. Yoongi grinned like an idiot and teased him about being your favorite. 

"She's in heat, and you're her alpha. It doesn't mean anything," Jimin grumbled back.

When he noticed you begin to sag, not less happy but beginning to look more tired, Hobi grabbed your purple blanket from the dryer and whisked you upstairs. It was time for your first heat nest, as well as your first nest for your pack. They looked on from the hallway, your alpha and beta, but you tried not to look back at them. 

"Do you think…?" You felt very nervous, afraid you wouldn't be able to provide the comfort they were used to. 

"Don't think about it," Hobi told you. "Remember, the nest isn't for them. It's for you, and they're just lucky to be there. Only worry about what you need tonight."

Maybe your nest ended up a little asymmetrical as you tried your best to make it bigger for the three of you. Only you and Hobi noticed, and no one said a thing. It was cozy and warm and enough for your pack. That was all that mattered right now. When you had each pillow and blanket where you felt it should go, you turned to the boys. They only looked back at you, so you walked to the door and grabbed Jimin by the wrist to pull him over to the bed. Never one to pass up the opportunity to tease, he merely stood there, waiting for you to puppet him into position, to place him like one of your soft pillows. When you looked up at him with large pleading eyes, he still didn't respond. You huffed and pushed him on the bed, to which he only giggled as he flopped over. Yoongi was much more eager to please. His smile looked like it might crack his face in half as he went to his designated spot. Then you looked back at Hobi. 

"All that's left is you, pup," he smiled softly at you.

You bit your lip before you found your voice to speak. "Is it good?"

"That's for you to decide, and for that you have to get in," he urged, gently guiding you to the side of the bed where you had put Yoongi. "But from here it looks very good, little one."

You looked doubtfully at your nest for a moment, wondering how to go about getting into it, before Yoongi grabbed you by your waist and lifted you in to lay between him and Jimin. The beta didn't waste a second wrapping his arms around you and nuzzling into your neck playfully. 

"This is definitely one of the best nests I've ever been in," he said as he probed your scent gland with his nose. 

Yoongi smiled at the two of you before he looked back at Hobi. He thought the omega looked almost longing, as if he wished he could be in there, too. "Thank you, Hobah," Yoongi said softly when he caught the alpha watching.

"I didn't do anything," Hobi replied. 

Yoongi shook his head. "We wouldn't be here without you. You've helped a lot."

Hobi sighed, "Well, I'll just be down the hall if you need anything."

Before he could leave, Yoongi reached out to take his hand and pulled him closer. He placed a kiss on the omega's lips and whispered another thanks. 

"Goodnight, pups. Sleep well," he said before leaving the room, but Jimin was already taking your mind far away.

The thunder didn't start up again until you were already asleep, well and deeply off to dreamland after Jimin and Yoongi scented you into a happy puddle between them. Jimin's lavender had been getting stronger over the past couple of weeks. He might not have noticed it, but you had. As he drove your scent higher and higher, his own followed suit. Tonight, his soothing smell soaked the pillow under your head as well as the air around you, and maybe that's why your usually awful dreams were just slightly less so. 

Maybe you had taken some of the power out of the memories when you told the three of them earlier. 

Maybe, for once, you just felt safe. 

You always dreamed about that first heat every time after that. It was one of the things you wanted to avoid when you decided to use the pills to escape the endless cycles. Sometimes you dreamed that when you were alone at night in the woods, animals came and tore you apart with their teeth. Sometimes other villains from your past waited to give you fitting punishment for the transgression of being what you were born to be. 

Tonight, after your parents dropped you off at the edge of the trees, the sky grew dark with rain clouds, and thunder cracked loudly overhead. You screamed, and a hand reached out to grab your shoulder. As you tried to squirm away, hiding your face to avoid a blow, you heard his voice. Quiet and steady. 

"It's okay, princess. I'm here." It was Yoongi's voice speaking to you in the darkness, and he took you in his arms. "It's just a storm."

He pulled you to your feet and you began to walk deeper into the forest. 

"Where are we going?" You asked as you stumbled along beside him. 

"I'm taking you home," he answered. 

Another loud clap of thunder rumbled the whole house, and your eyes snapped open. Your fists tightened around Yoongi's shirt. 

"It's okay, princess. It's just a storm. I'm right here." His soft voice was followed by lips pressed to your forehead. 

"Where are we?" You asked. 

"We're at home. We're in your nest. It's safe and perfect. You did such a good job pup," he complimented, his arms secured around you.

You relaxed against him, letting go of his t-shirt, and pressed your forehead to his collarbone. "I'm really glad you like it."

Yoongi hummed appreciatively. "You're my favorite part though."

Butterflies rustled their wings in your stomach and you pressed yourself closer "Sorry for waking you."

"You didn't. Go back to sleep, little one. I'll be here, watching over you."

You couldn't fight the command, either because you were eager to do as he asked or because your eyes were already heavy and closing on their own. It really didn't matter. 

Yoongi wasn't naive enough to believe that the next several days were going to be easy for him. He knew it would take a level of self-restraint that he'd never had to possess before. But it would be worth it if he could make you feel safe. 

He hadn't pictured waking up with his leg between yours while you grind your heat against his thigh. Your mouth was wet and warm as you kissed and licked at his collar bone. At first, he didn't know what he should do. He didn't mind. Not in the slightest. He was more than happy to lay there and offer you any relief he could. But he was cognizant enough to realize that your actions might progress into more complicated territory, if he let it, and the farther you got, the harder it would be to stop or change course. 

Yoongi turned more onto his side, raising his hand to your back before sliding it up to your hair. His grip was firm but gentle as he held you a few inches away from him.

"Good morning, princess," he said softly and watched you smile. Your eyes were completely glazed over, but you looked so happy. He kept you there for several more seconds before you started to whine. 

"Alpha," was the only word to pass your lips, and it came out desperately. Your hips, which had paused before, began to move in circular motions again, and your whines deepened in pitch until they became moans. Warm, gooey apple pie coated his tongue and his skin as it fluffed out from your scent glands. The deep primal place within him that mirrors yours began to rumble in his chest, a satisfied growl that told him this was right. You were his omega, and he had you oh so close at last. He brought your mouth to his in a teeth-clashing, devouring kiss that you happily reciprocated. Yoongi's other arm wound around your back, pulling your chest against his. Nothing but the thin fabric of the soft pajamas you both wore stood between your bodies. He couldn't get enough of you, and he wanted you to get all of him that you needed, so he held you firmly and let you continue your writhing against him. 

It wasn't long before your movement woke Jimin, too. For a moment, he was confused, having never woken up in your nest before. But he turned over to see you pressed against Yoongi, both oblivious to him as you kissed. He sat up quickly, wondering if Yoongi had already lost his self-control so quickly and was relieved to see you both had your clothes on still. A smirk crossed his lips at how greedily you kissed Yoongi. With Hoseok, there were always so many partners to focus on, so many other bodies in the room. He never looked quite as hungry as you did now. And Yoongi never quite got to have his way with Hoseok the way he was with you now, giving you his complete and undivided attention. At least until Jimin reached out and touched your waist, at which point he pulled away just far enough to let out a feral growl. 

You let out a sound, half whine, half moan, but Jimin just laughed. 

"Calm down, hyung. It's just me," he said as he ran his fingers into Yoongi's hair and pulled slightly. "It's just Jiminie." 

In response, Yoongi gave a happy grumble and raised his head to get a kiss from Jimin. The beta nipped playfully at his lips that you had kissed swollen and pouty. He could taste you all over Yoongi's mouth, and you were as delicious as you smelled. Half laying back down beside you, Jimin pulled you against him, creating a little distance between you and your alpha. He held you firmly at your ribs, just under your breast. A sigh slipped past your lips as Jimin's mouth met your shoulder. His teeth pinched your skin before his soft lips soothed his bites away. 

Yoongi, however, wasn't too pleased with having his plaything stolen away and slid down to press kisses to bits of skin that your thin tank top left exposed. Hungry, open-mouthed kisses along your collarbones led to red-turning-purple hickies blooming on the swells at the top of your breasts.

And that's how Hobi found you when he came to bring you breakfast, only to discover you being devoured. He couldn't help a little laugh. 

"Look at the three of you, humping like a bunch of horny teenagers."

Three sets of eyes, all black-pitted with arousal, turned in his direction, startled but not alarmed.

"Sorry to interrupt, pups, but I think I did you a favor. You need something to eat and drink." He set a tray at the end of the bed and knelt on the wooden chest to chat with you all. Well, with Jimin and Yoongi. Their eyes were slowly returning to normal while yours remained somewhat clouded, too far down in omega space to come up simply because someone brought in food. Yoongi helped you sit up, though it was really more like leaning you against him. Jimin pulled up the top of your shirt, but it did nothing to hide the darkening bruises. 

"How was last night?" Hoseok asked as Yoongi plucked a tangerine from the tray of food and quickly peeled the rind in one piece. He tore away a slice and pressed it to your lips. 

"Eat it," he chuckled when you only looked up at him, and you opened your mouth just enough for him to slide it past your lips. "It was fine. She had a couple nightmares, but I think it was the storms, and she calmed down soon after."

Jimin hummed as he took a sip of coffee. "It would make sense that she doesn't like storms," Jimin thought aloud, as if you weren't there, and in a way, you weren't. You didn't process much of what they said but only stared at Yoongi's lips, waiting to be given another bite. It wasn't the food you craved, but your alpha's attention. 

"Why?" Hobi asked, watching you fixate on Yoongi. He wondered if he looked that cute and absorbed in his alphas. 

"I mean, all that time she spent on the street, she probably has weathered a few bad ones. And then there was the night she came home…"

Hobi shuttered at the thought of you alone and wet. But sitting as you were now with Yoongi, there was nothing but happiness and safety visible around you. 

"You're safe now, aren't you, pup?" Yoongi cooed as his thumb lingered over your bottom lip. 

"See if she'll take some of the eggs," Hobi suggested, handing him a bowl of scrambled eggs. "She needs protein, too. Sometimes you guys forget."

There were forks on the tray, but Yoongi didn't bother with it. The eggs were firm enough for him to grab a bite with his fingers. Now you eagerly opened your mouth for him, lightly licking his fingertips when they touched your tongue. It could have been gross, but if the way the three men watched you was any indication, it was clearly erotic. Hobi watched Yoongi feed you a couple more bites before he snapped out of it. 

"How is she handling…her urges?" He asked, struggling to find a way to put it delicately. Normally he wouldn't bother, but with you the whole topic felt more sensitive. 

Yoongi shrugged. 

"They were already all over each other when I woke up," Jimin answered. 

"She was all over me when I woke up!" Yoongi defended. "What was I supposed to do?"

"Control yourself a little, maybe?" Hoseok suggested. 

"I was! I would have stopped it before it got any farther," Yoongi said, but he wasn't completely convincing.

"Yoon." Hobi looked into the alpha's eyes deeply and they stared at one another for a long moment.

"Don't worry guys. That's what I'm here for. I promise not to let him go too far," Jimin interrupted. 

Hobi sighed and lowered his eyes to the tray of food. "Can you guys handle this?"

"We can!" Jimin answered. "I promise. We've got this. I'm not going to let her get hurt."

"Well, then I guess I'll go get her dildos ready for when the time comes," Hoseok said with an eye roll as he hauled himself up from his seat. 

"I didn't buy her dildos! There will be no fucking! It's just to ease her discomfort," Yoongi responded. 

"Gosh, you're so sensitive right now, Yoongles," Hobi snickered. His mocking was all for Yoongi, not for you. Yet deep down, the omega was proud of him for making these choices for you. Most alphas probably wouldn't. Most would either try to convince an omega to do something they weren't comfortable with or leave the omega alone to deal with it themselves. The fact that Yoongi, and even Jimin, was willing to go through the discomfort of not being able to care for you in the traditional way filled Hobi with pride. 

He left the room, picking up the black bag Yoongi had brought home last night on his way to the bathroom across the hall. With the door shut, he removed not one but two silicone plugs. At the store, Yoongi had realized how unprepared he was. He didn't know what size you would need. One the one hand, you were so tiny, it didn't seem like anything but the smallest would fit inside of you, but on the other, his inner voice had told him you'd need to feel nice and full to be comfortable. In the end, he chose a smaller one and another he thought was comparable to his own size and rushed home. But at least he'd thought about getting the special cleanser, too. The pack wasn't big into sex toys, having more than enough appendages of all sizes to go around. Hobi carefully removed the plugs from their packaging and cleaned them thoroughly. Then he placed them in a soft, clean towel and took them back across the hall, setting them on top of your dresser. 

He sighed and wiped his hands on his pants. "Okay, so, they should be ready…whenever you need them." 

He went to go grab the tray off the bed, which the boys had mostly cleared off. Yoongi watched the omega while chewing the inside of his check. When their eyes met, he decided to speak.

"I was kind of hoping you'd be here to help," he said quickly and softly. His cheeks heating with shame and a flurry of other emotions. Yoongi could fuck with the best of them. Of the alphas, only he and Taehyung had ever been with women. But Yoongi was still at a loss of how to do this, and how to handle you. In his heart, he was terrified of hurting you, or scaring you and ruining everything. Maybe it was wrong to use Hobi as a crutch, but he needed it. 

Hoseok froze, half crouched with the tray in his hands. His eyes slid from Yoongi over to you where you buried your face in Yoongi's shoulder. He was uncharacteristically speechless, and spent several long seconds searching for words. 

"Oh…um…well. I didn't realize you'd actually need me for that part," he admitted. "I have some things I need to do right now."

"Not right now, no. I don't think she's there yet. It might not be until later. But I–I think we need you, Hobi." The desperation in Yoongi's vice only made things more difficult for the omega.

"I don't know, Yoongi. Jin…I don't know if he would like it."

Yoongi hung his head. He couldn't argue with that. There wasn't necessarily any reason for Jin to disapprove. It wouldn't interfere with anything regarding Hoseok or Jin's pack. Not really. But you were part of Yoongi's pack, and Hoseok was not. And you weren't Jin's either. This was new and uncharted territory, but Yoongi realized he really wasn't in a position to ask this much. Seokjin had been as good as he could be expected to be in the last few weeks, and to ask any more might be pushing their luck.

"Right. I understand," Yoongi sighed.

"It's not that I don't want to help, Yoon–"

Yoongi held up a hand. "No. No, I get it. I shouldn't have asked. It's too much to ask. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry," Hoseok said softly.

"No. It's alright. You can go." Yoongi said it quietly enough that Hobi knew he wasn't mad, but he could help feeling that the alpha seemed defeated, and his stomach swirled with guilt. He lowered his eyes and backed out of the room. Just before the door closed, he heard Jimin's voice:

"Don't worry, hyung. We'll work it out."

Hobi carried the tray down to the kitchen and set it on the counter next to the sink. He inhaled deeply and exhaled to release the tension in his shoulders. Instead of immediately starting on the dishes, he decided to seek out Taehyung. 

Although he hadn't seen the youngest alpha get up, he'd seen the pack's bedroom door open, so he knew he must be around somewhere. He wasn't playing games in the living room, so Hobi looked for him in the sun room at the front of the house that had been granted to him as his art studio. But he wasn't there either. So Hobi went to the backdoor and slipped into someone's slides. Noticing the door to the detached garage was open, he set off across the spacious backyard in that direction. 

Inside the dusty outbuilding was an assortment of things that Hoseok either hadn't yet found a place for or wasn't willing to let go of, alongside tools and Hobi's ambitions for a blooming garden by the time summer came around, but no cars. He did, however, find his alpha. Taehyung must have been lost in thought because he jumped a little when Hobi spoke. 

"What's an alpha like you doing all the way out here?" He asked in that teasing voice he seemed to love using most on Tae.

"I thought I'd get started on your garden finally," he said flatly. "If we keep putting it off, the season will go by."

"You need to start today?"

"It's a beautiful day," Tae countered. Hoseok didn't miss the fact that the alpha hadn't looked at him once since he walked in, so he stepped forward to place a hand on his cheek. The two men were almost exactly the same height, so it wasn't difficult for Hobi to meet him eye to eye. 

"Is something on your mind?" He asked. Tae closed his eyes and took a breath, breathing in the scent of you. 

"It's just kind of strange, y'know. Spending time with her yesterday, I guess I felt like I was on the inside track, and now I feel so far outside. I just want to see her and talk to her and…"

"Fuck her brains out?"

"I'm not a pig, Hoseok…. But I am an alpha so like just a little bit. Yeah, I guess," he chuckled while his ears reddened. "I just want to spend some time outside until the others come back, so you don't have to worry about me."

Hoseok smiled as he placed his other hand on the other side of Tae's face and stroked his beautiful high cheekbones. "That's fine, baby boy. It's good to keep yourself busy," he agreed before he kissed his lips gently. "You're doing a great job. And I'm sure as soon as this is all over, you'll be right back where you were with her."

Taehyung's eyes sparked with hope. "I hope so. How is she doing?"

Hoseok attempted to keep his smile in place, but Taehyung knew it well enough to see how the corners of his lips drooped. "She's getting through it. It's not easy for her. It doesn't mean to her what it means to us. Not yet anyway."

Taehyung frowned. "Do you ever see her and think how lucky you are that you got to grow up with your family?" Hobi hummed. "The ways she doesn't know how to be herself are more heartbreaking than the scars of how people have hurt her."

"I'm trying my best–" Hoseok's voice broke at the thought of continuing your life as you'd been living it. 

"You're doing so well with her. Sometimes, I think the luckiest thing will be her having you. Not to disrespect Yoongi hyung, but he can only make her physically safe. Which is important but…I don't know if it would ever matter if you weren't there to stop her from hurting herself on the inside."

Hoseok lowered his eyes and shook his head. "Sometimes the things she says make me so mad, if they came from anyone else, I'd slap them right in the mouth."

Taehyung laughed. "Well, don't do that, and I think she'll keep learning from you. You're good for her."

"I'm just doing my best. I can't fix her."

"You don't have to fix her. I know you love her. That's enough."

Hobi thought it over for a moment. "I guess I do…like I would a child."

Tae snorted. "Sure, hyung. Like a child."

Hoseok went back into the house to take care of the dishes from the morning. There were no sounds coming from upstairs. Your scent filled the house, but it remained even. Maybe you had fallen asleep in your pack's arms. Regardless, he couldn't keep his thoughts from you. His help was needed, and he wanted to give it, but how far could he go to do that? 

Yoongi and Jin had drawn lines around you that were clear and solid for the members of the two packs living in his house, but not for Hobi. No one could exactly tell the pack omega what to do, not even Jin, but that didn't necessarily mean he would do whatever he pleased. Even though helping you through this ordeal wouldn't impact Hoseok and his upcoming heat in any way, that didn't mean he was free to lend himself out for…sexual services. But it wasn't like you were an alpha or that Hobi would get any gratification from helping you. His head spun with the ramifications, and his stomach twisted into knots as he scrubbed dish after dish. 

Finally, he decided to do the only thing he could do when he struggled to make a decision. He called his husband. 

"Hello, my love. Is everything okay?" Jin asked when he answered his phone. It wasn't common for Hoseok to call him in the morning at work. 

"Yeah, everyone's fine," Hobi answered, but he couldn't hide the shake in his voice from Jin, and the silence that lingered after didn't help to sell it.

Jin smiled. He knew if something was really wrong that Hoseok wouldn't hesitate to say it, so there must be something on his mind, and whatever it was made him shy. "What is it, Seokkie?" 

The omega blushed at the infrequently used pet name. It made him feel like a boy again. It had been Jungkook who started calling him Hobi, and now Jin only used 'Seokkie' when they were alone or he wanted to be particularly intimate. It reminded them both of just how long their love story was and how deeply they knew one another. Hoseok explained your predicament to his husband in a rush of words, like ripping off a bandaid.

"I see," Jin responded when he'd finished, not knowing what else to say. 

"If you don't want me to do it, then I won't," Hobi added. 

Jin chuckled. "You're asking for my permission? Since when?"

"This is serious Jinnie."

The alpha took a beat to appreciate that. Hoseok was right. He'd explained your history to Jin last night, so he knew just how fragile you were on the subject. He didn't expect to hear how Yoongi struggled. "Do you want to do it for Yoongi or for her?"

Hobi sighed. "Both? I don't know. I want her to feel okay. I want to help him avoid doing something he'll regret later. I want everyone to feel happy. Including you. Including me."

Jin considered that. He tried to consider how Yoongi must feel, only being able to offer his omega this small bit of relief instead of what he would naturally want to give you. But he knew that Yoongi wasn't really the obstacle to helping you. It was him. It was knowing that you were Yoongi's in the way that Hobi was his. And as much as Hobi could go his own way on things, he'd never disrespect Jin or disregard his feelings. "Do you think she'll be part of our pack one day? Is that a possibility?"

Hobi's tone brightened. "I really do! She's trying very hard, Jinnie. She's listening and learning. And I think she trusts me. I think she could trust you."

Jin conceded. "I'm not going to stop you, my love. If you want to help them, it's fine with me. But only if you're comfortable with it, and not because Yoongi is in over his head."

Hoseok felt some of the pressure lift off his chest. "Okay." He took a deep breath and sighed. "Look, I don't know if this will even happen today, let alone when. So I might be busy when you come home."

"Don't worry, love. I'll take the other boys out for dinner. We'll get our time with you later this week." Hoseok could hear the happiness in his tone, but he didn't dwell on it. Those feelings would have to wait a few days. They said their goodbyes and hung up with Hobi feeling a bit lighter. But he'd be lying if he said Jin had alleviated all his worries. 

He had permission now, but that didn't mean that he would be able to do. 

Hoseok had never been with another omega before, let alone a woman. And he knew Yoongi said it wasn't fucking, but was still intimate and sexual, and he didn't think he had any idea what to do down there, with you. He knew you weren't that different, but you were different enough for him to feel scared.

But even that wasn't the real issue that he was afraid of facing. Hoseok cared for you deeply. He wouldn't say it to your face because he's just not serious like that, but he could even think he loved you. Maybe not quite in a paternal way, but as a mentor, an older brother; as someone whose job it was to teach you about life. He didn't want to see you as an object of attraction. He didn't want to acknowledge how his heart fluttered yesterday as you tried on outfit after outfit, or how his breath catches when he sees you really smile, much less how fucking good you smell during your heat, when your scent coats the back of his throat, or how sexy your lips looked touching Yoongi's fingers this morning. Hobi wasn't ready to be attracted to you or in love with you. It wasn't on his list of things to do with you.

Footsteps on the stairs pulled Hoseok from his thoughts, and he looked up to see Jimin round the corner with his phone to his ear, giving him a remorseful look. He took his cue to go upstairs and check on how things were going. It had been about an hour since he'd left your room, and he wondered if something had happened. He opened the door quietly and poked his head in.

"Is everything okay?" He asked. 

Yoongi's attention snapped from the phone in his hand to the omega. "Yeah, fine. I was just about to text you. Jimin had to take a call from work, and I really have to go to the bathroom. Would you mind staying with her for a few minutes? She's asleep, but I don't want her to wake up alone."

"Of course. No problem," Hobi nodded. Normally, for him, there were enough packmates that he would never be left alone. Not that he couldn't be left alone, but it was a bit distressing, particularly during the headier moment of heat, to find oneself all alone. And given that this was your first heat in a while to not spend alone—your first one to spend with them—it made sense that Yoongi wouldn't want to leave you in your own. It would cause him a different kind of distress to do so. 

Yoongi gently rolled you off of his chest so that you lay on your back and he could free his arm. He got up quietly and quickly left the room. When you were alone, you rolled into your other side and whimpered softly. You bent one leg up towards your body, while the other one stuck straight out toward Hobi. He couldn't help but be fascinated by your little feet. They seemed too small to be able to carry you through the world, yet their wear and callouses showed they worked hard to do just that. Seeing how tiny they were reminded him of how quietly you moved through the house. He was still trying to learn the sounds of your footsteps and of your breathing so that he'd be able to recognize you just by that, the way he could the rest of his pack.

It wasn't a secret even though he was trying to hide it, that Hobi already thought of you as his. He'd waited a long time for an omega like you. Someone like him that he could share this pack with, through its highs and lows and day to days. 

He didn't realize he was holding onto your foot, stoking his thumb over the bulge of your ankle, until you spoke his name. 

"Hobi?" You asked, voice gravelly and thick with sleep. 

"It's just me, pup," he nodded. 

You looked around at your surroundings and noticed he was right. It was just him and you. The air around you felt cold, sending goosebumps down your arms despite your internal heat. You weakly raised a hand toward him. "Will you come lay with me?"

Hoseok swallowed and stood up slowly to walk to the edge of the bed on the side Jimin took. When he looked in your eyes, they were clearer than they had been this morning. He stood silently, looking at you, for a long moment before either of you spoke. "I've never been in your nest before, pup."

"I'm inviting you in now. Please come lay down," you said so softly he could barely hear it. 

But he took it genuinely and climbed in over the perimeter to where you laid. He settled several inches from you, but you scooted closer, forcing him to hold you. He knew you'd never do that if you weren't in your current condition, but he didn't refuse you. Instead, he managed to get one arm under your head while the other stroked up and down your back. You pressed your head into his chest and breathed in deep. 

"Have I ever told you how much I love your scent?" You asked. He shook his head, unable to form words around the sudden tightness in his chest, as if his heart and lungs were too big for his ribcage. "It's so warm and comforting to me. Your scent is on every surface in this house, and it smells like love."

Your voice was so dreamy, Hobi wasn't sure if you knew what you were saying, but it filled him with warmth regardless, and his scent fluffed around you. Your hands fisted around his shirt, and you buried your face in him. He liked you like this, uninhibited, taking what you wanted and needed without feeling shy. It was easy to wrap his arms around you and hold you closer. He could only hope you felt as safe with him as you truly were.

Yoongi returned pleasantly surprised to find both of his omegas tangled up in your nest. You had already fallen back asleep and Hobi appeared to be studying every hair on your head. His eyes turned up to meet Yoongi's and the alphas wide smile broke across his face. 

"You certainly made yourself at home," Yoongi teased as he closed the door. 

"She invited me."

"I know you wouldn't be here if she hadn't." 

"What are you looking at?" Hoseok asked when Yoongi continued to stare.

"Just enjoying this moment. Jin would be so jealous if he knew what I had all to myself right now."

Hobi rolled his eyes. "It's not a competition."

"We're alphas. It's always a competition."

Yoongi placed his knees behind your back and leaned over you to kiss Hoseok. The omega's lips were dry, but Yoongi licked across them and they parted, letting him deepen the kiss. 

Hoseok chuckled and pulled back as much as he could in his position. "What are you doing?"

Yoongi shrugged and moved to lay behind you. "Just telling you I love you." He laid his hand on the curve of your side. "She idolizes you, you know?"

Hoseok's eyes widened. "I don't think so."

"She does. She talks about the things you teach her and tell her, like you're some revered master. She wants your approval. Even more than I think she wants mine." Yoongi's eyes roamed over your body, wondering if you heard them. 

"It's not about my approval," Hobi whispered. 

"I know that. She said to me a few weeks ago that she wants to be good so she can stay. I think she's starting to get that there isn't anything she can do that will make me send her away. But she is afraid of disappointing you. I know she isn't perfect, but don't be too hard on her, please?" Yoongi locked eyes with him, and Hobi could see his sincerity in those depths. 

"Tae mentioned earlier that she makes him feel lucky, I guess because even if he lost his family, he still knew them, and he learned enough from them not to let the world get him down. She doesn't have that. I don't want her to be exactly like me. I just don't want her to be all the things they've made her believe she is. It hurts too much. And if it hurts me, with all the advantages I have, I can't possibly imagine how much damage it does to her," Hobi concluded. He gently brushed hair out of your face with the lightest of touches, relieved to see that you were still soundly asleep. 

Before Yoongi could find any way to respond, the door opened once again and Jimin entered.

"Is everything okay?" Yoongi asked.

"Everything is fine. Just some alphas who need to work their shit out, but it's not my problem today, and that's what I told them." Jimin climbed over the chest at the end of the bed and up to the perimeter of your nest. 

"They gave you a hard time?"

Jimin shook his head. "Taehyung on the other hand…well he's getting very sweaty in the backyard right now, and it was a little distracting," he giggled.

"I'm sorry for taking your spot, but I dont think I'm allowed to move," Hobi said without an ounce of remorse.

Jimin shrugged as he moved over the perimeter and laid at the bottom of your nest. "I'm fine right here."

Alpha.

You'd been asleep for a long time. It was your primary mechanism for getting through your heats when you couldn't avoid them. If you were sleeping, you might have bad dreams, but you could avoid the physical sensations associated with your condition. Your sleep since last night had been relatively peaceful, which you could only contribute to the soothing scents of your pack and even hobi, which surrounded you as you slept. But now Yoongi was missing from your nest, and you needed him. 

Not just needed him there, but you needed him. 

Need alpha's knot now. Please. Your tiny voice in your head begged. You could feel it, the ache between your legs. You could feel the thick, warm slick leaking from you, ready and waiting for your alpha to give you what was yours.

"Alpha," you whined brokenly, alerting the others that you were awake. You had begun to murmur his name a little while ago, seeking him out with your hands and your mouth before you were conscious enough to make a real effort. Hoseok could see that you were now. "Where's alpha," you cried.

"I'm over here, princess," Yoongi breathed from the chair in the corner where he sat, apart from you, but still keeping watch. 

"In the nest," you whined. 

"I can't be with you right now. I'm sorry," he told you. If you were fully yourself, you'd be able to hear the regret in his voice, but you didn't. 

"Why? Give me a knot, alpha. Promise I'll be good. Just need your knot."

Yoongi's hands gripped the arms of the chair until his knuckles turned white. "I wish I could, baby." You began to cry, and the sight of your tears made him ache in a way so much stronger than the strain in his muscle to keep himself off of you. He knew it would be hard to deny himself, but he didn't know how hard it would be to deny you. "Hobi, Jimin, please," he croaked.

Suddenly a hand on your ankle grabbed your attention. You looked down and could make out Jimin's face through your tears.

"It's okay, sweet thing. Hobi and I are going to make you feel better," he said soothingly.

"Alpha…doesn't want me."

A growl came low from Yoongi's corner, but you didn't get a chance to look in his direction because another hand was holding your face and demanding your gaze. 

"That isn't true," Hobi said firmly. "Your alpha wants you too much for his own good. But he's doing this for you. He cares for you so much, he doesn't want to hurt you. You'll understand when this is all over."

If possible, your features turned even more sad. "When will it be over?" You rasped.

He wiped away your tears with his thumbs. "Hold on for me a while longer, little one. Can Jimin and I help you?" 

"Help?"

"We can help make the aching go away. But you have to stop crying first," he told you softly as he continued to dry your cheeks.

You sniffed and scrunched your face, as if you were physically shutting off the tears. Your eyes finally cleared and you looked at Hobi expectantly. "I'll do anything."

He smiled as if he were amused and kissed your cheek. "Good girl. We're gonna make you feel nice and full, okay?"

You gave a muted squeak of excitement. "First let Jimin take off your shorts, okay?" 

You nodded and laid back on the nest. Hobi moved away from you, which startled you at first, but Jimin distracted you with his hands, gliding them smoothly up your legs from your ankles to your hips. He hovered over you to capture your mouth with a kiss. His lips were warm and wet. His kiss wasn't shy or chaste, but messy and ravenous as he licked into your mouth. His fingers dug into your thighs as you kissed him back. You lifted your hips up when he gripped your waistband and pulled the shorts down your legs without taking his mouth from yours. Meanwhile, Hoseok got up to grab the smaller of the two fake knots they had prepared for you. When he returned, Jimin redirected his mouth to your neck, giving you soft sucking kisses.

"Okay, little one." He held the plug in front of your face. "This little knot is all yours. I'll help you put it in, and you can keep it as long as you want."

He could see you were a little confused. You looked to your alpha, who was still holding himself back, but looked a little more at ease. Instead of digging into the upholstery, he held his fist around the pair of shorts Jimin had tossed his way.

"Go on, princess. Let alpha see how pretty you look when you're full," he said, his voice coming from deep in his gut. 

"Let us see, sweet thing," Jimin hummed in your ear. "You'll feel so nice."

You turned your eyes to Hoseok and nodded your consent.

"If you want a knot, you'll have to ask for it, pup," he said evenly. He was teasing, but he also wanted to make sure you really wanted it.

"Please, please give me a knot," you begged pitifully, rubbing your thighs together as you continued to ache for it. "I need to feel it. Please."

Jimin lapped hungrily at the scent gland under your chin while Hobi moved to your lower half. "You've never smelled sweeter, sweet thing. I wanna eat you up," Jimin teased, making you giggle, distracting you from Hoseok prying your legs apart.

Hoseok can say unequivocally that he's never been this close to a pussy in his life—with the singular exception of when he was born. He was surprised to find himself thinking how cute you are. Your sweet little hole didn't really look like his, but you were just as wet and messy and sweet as he gets. Your labia were puffy and he was sure they ached to feel relief. He took a deep breath to steady himself before he dared to touch his fingers to the rim of your entrance. At the lightest pressure, you clenched around nothing, and Hoseok felt the most unexpected shock of arousal ring through him. He didn't need to think before he pushed the tips of his two middle fingers inside of you. It might be more prudent to start with one, but you were in heat and you were more than ready to take him.

Your answering moan filled the room, and Hoseok was glad that Jin took the others out for dinner because you sounded so heavenly, he didn't think the three of them would be able to stop the other four from barging in.

"Such a pretty sound for me, baby," Jimin cooed while Yoongi melted in his chair, wishing he could be closer, but so happy to hear you were being pleased. 

Hoseok pushed one more finger past your slick walls and nearly moaned himself when he felt you squeeze around him.

"You're doing great, little one," he praised as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you, feeling your muscles loosen little by little. "Are you ready to take your knot, pup?" He asked when he felt like you'd opened up enough. He took your garbled moan and the way you clenched as a yes.

Hobi spread some of your slick from his fingers onto the plug, though it was hardly necessary. Your hole was dripping with it, and he had felt you gush onto his hand before. He looked up to see your face.

"It might hurt for a second, little one. Tell me to stop if you want me to stop," he instructed, and you nodded your head.

Jimin trailed his mouth down to your breast, pulling down your top to expose a perky little nipple, which he sucked into his mouth. Hobi rubbed the head of the plug over your entrance to coat it with your slick before he slowly pushed it inside of you. Your moans were deep and throaty, and he had to bite back his own arousal as your walls closed in around the silicone head. Despite his fears of hurting you, the toy slid in easily until it was buried fully inside you. It wasn't as long as a real knot, and it didn't have quite the same girth as your alpha, but it fit snugly within your walls, and he could tell it was doing just what they'd wanted when you let out a happy sigh.

Hoseok came to lie at your side and turned your face so he could see your eyes. They were fully glassy and happy as they rolled to look at him. Your debauched expression threatened to steal the better part of his sanity.

"How does that feel, little one?" He breathed. 

"So full," you answered and your body wriggled beneath them, but there seemed to be some words hanging, left unsaid, but Hoseok didn't quite know what.

"You can touch yourself, if you want to, sweet thing," Jimin rasped in your ear.

Don't you dare.

You shut your eyes tight and shook your head. "Can't," you hiccuped. 

Understanding dawned on Hoseok and he touched your face. "Look at me," he ordered and you obeyed. "You're doing so well, little one. Such a good little omega for us. You can do it."

You shook your head again. "Can't. Bad," you choked out. "Bad."

"No, pup."

"Let me in," Yoongi said, suddenly standing over Hoseok's shoulder.

"Yoongi…"

"I'm not going to do anything I said I wouldn't," Yoongi argued, but his eyes were locked with yours. "Let me hold her." 

"Alpha," you whispered, holding a hand out to him, and Hobi had no choice but to relinquish his spot beside you, though he didn't move far.

"I've got you, princess," he soothed when he was pressed to your side with one arm behind your head. "Does it feel good to be so filled up?"

You nodded your head into him, seeking out his neck and his thick scent. But he wouldn't let you turn into him. 

"I know, baby. You were made for this. Your body does it so well. But you don't feel totally better yet, do you, princess?"

"No."

Yoongi smiled and kissed your forehead. Taking your hand he murmured, "here, let me show you. It's not bad. It will feel good. You've been so perfect, princess. I want you to feel the best you can."

With his hand covering yours, he guided you down between your legs. He brought your fingers far enough to feel the silicone base of the plug where it was buried inside of you.

"Do you feel that, baby? Alpha gave you that. Do you like it?" He purred in your ear. You whimpered and nodded your head, utterly incapable of forming words with the way his body, his scent and his voice wrapped around your being. 

Pulling your hand back just a little, he pressed your fingers to the puffy, sensitive flesh just above. You mewled in pleasure, moving your hips as you squeezed around the knot. He began to circle your fingers around your bud, appreciating the delicate sounds of satisfaction you made as he guided you. When you moaned, Jimin reclaimed your mouth with a kiss, claiming your sounds for his own. Yoongi left his hand on yours but let you set the pace while at the same time letting his other hand cup your breast, squeezing it harshly. Another set of hands—they must have been Hobi's—held your legs apart when they threatened close so that he could continue you watch as you pleasured yourself. When your moans got higher and he knew you were close, Yoongi pressed his fingers down on yours, adding pressure and ensuring you didn't give up until you reached completion.

"Almost there, princess. You've done so well for me. Come for me, and you can keep my knot in you as long as you want," he urged, and you followed where his words and fingers led you, over the edge and into a chasm of pleasure.

Watching you spasm around the knot took Hoseok's breath away. He'd never imagined or wondered what that might be like, but he thought it was beautiful. He wanted to give you orgasm after orgasm just to see your pussy take it again and again. Your legs wanted to close, and he let them. You curled into Yoongi, taking gasping breaths as he held you tightly to his chest and whispered soft praises. Jimin stroked his hand down your side and up again. 

By the time Hoseok had cleaned you up with a warm, wet cloth, you were falling asleep in Yoongi's arms once again, the plug still tucked safely away inside of you and a satisfied smile on your lips.

"I'll go get dinner ready. I'm guessing we're all pretty much starving," Hobi said softly, gathering a few things to take out with him to tidy up the place.

As he opened the door, Yoongi transfered you into Jimin's arms. Luckily, you didn't wake, and Yoongi followed the other omega into the hall. Hoseok was just entering your bathroom when Yoongi went in with him.

"What's wrong, Yoongi?" He asked, looking at him with startled eyes. The alpha was disheveled and his eyes were still dark with lust, something Hobi found irresistible.

"Nothing,"Yoongi breathed heavily. "I just wanted to say thank you. You didn't have to help, but you did, so thanks."

Hoseok smirked. "I didn't do it for you, alpha."

"I know. But I wouldn't have been able to get through it without you."

Hoseok's eyes grew darker, his smile more mocking. "Did you get through it, alpha? Looks like you're still pretty worked up to me." He trailed his fingers down Yoongi's chest. 

Yoongi's breath turned ragged as Hoseok stepped closer. "Can you blame me?"

"No. It was certainly eye opening," the omega purred. He gripped the front of Yoongi's shirt and pulled him closer. Their lips crashed as he shut the bathroom door. 

Yoongi's hands went to the other man's hair as he was pushed against the door. Hobi's teeth nipped the white flesh of yoongi's neck as he palmed fervently at his thick knot, trapped uncomfortably in the confines of his gray sweatpants.

"It's cruel, you know, to flaunt a knot like that in front of an omega."

"I don't need to flaunt anything to drive you crazy, do I, Hobi?"

"You think I'm worked up because of you?" He chuckled and pulled Yoongi's cock free. "Think again, buddy."

"Are you into my omega?" Yoongi smiled against his lips. Nimble fingers pulled a sigh from him. 

"I've certainly been into her more than you have."

Yoongi threw his head back with a short laugh. "Trying to make me jealous?"

"Would that get you to shut the hell up and fuck me?"

Yoongi turned the omega around and pinned him to the wall. "That's what you want, omega? Should make you beg for my knot, huh?"

"I'm not opposed. Poor little thing doesn't know what she's missing, though," he smiled as Yoongi shoved down both their pants. "She's so small and tight, alpha. That plug isn't nearly as big as you. Wonder if she can take it."

"Maybe you can show her how to take it next time," Yoongi growled as his fingers found Hoseok's hole. "Fuck, you're wet."

"Not as wet as she was. The sweet little cunt on your omega. Never seen anything like it." A wordless growl echoed off the walls of the bathroom, answered by Hoseok's high pitched moans as Yoongi's fingers found the right spot. "Fuck! Enough. Want your knot alpha. Give me everything you can't give her."

"Don't want to hurt you," Yoongi said, voice gravelly. 

"You won't. I know I can take you. Need you, alpha."

Yoongi didn't waste a moment. He pulled Hoseok's hips out, forcing his chest down, so he could align himself at his wet, pink entrance. Once he entered him, he plunged into Hobi's depths with ease. The omega braced himself against the wall as his alpha set a brutal pace. His cries of pleasure were not quiet, but only you and Jimin were there to hear, and you were dead to the world. 

"Fuck, yes. Have to teach her to take you like this. Would you like that, alpha? Want me to teach her everything I know?"

"Ah," Yoongi groaned as Hobi clenched around him, his slick making a mess of them both and dripping down his legs. "Don't think she'd ever learn to talk like you. You've got a whore's mouth, you know that?"

"You love it."

"I do. Now shut the fuck up so I can come. I'm fucking close, baby." 

Hoseok stayed stone still while Yoongi pounded into him, burying himself to the hilt when his knot began to inflate and he came with tired breaths. 

"Are you okay, baby?" Yoongi asked, stroking down his omegas back as he waited. These moments when he connected to his mates were always the most clear, filled with tenderness and love, no matter what words or deeds had brought them there. 

"Feel perfect, Yoon. You always make me feel so good. Missed you." 

"I'm sorry. I know I've been distracted lately." He pressed a soft kiss to Hobi's spine as an apology. 

Hobi shook his head as he leaned heavily against the wall. "Didn't say it to make you feel sorry. It's been a while since we had a moment like that. Like that I can be free with you. Makes things so fun."

"We do tend to have fun," Yoongi agreed. "Come here," he said softly when his knot had deflated. He brought Hoseok to the edge of the bathtub and began to fill it with warm water. Then he helped him in and got in behind him, letting the omega lay his back against his chest. 

"You don't have to stay here with me. I know you're probably anxious to get back to her," Hobi told him after they'd been sitting in the water for a few minutes.

"I am, but I'm not anxious to leave you. The truth is, I've missed you too. I know things never quite went back to usual and now, things will never be the way they were. I feel a little…guilty." Yoongi cupped water in his hand and let it wash down his lover's chest. 

"Don't. It's true, she'll change everything. But everything wasn't so good. Maybe it was a change we needed. I believe it will be for the best, in the end."

Yoongi hummed. "I also feel guilty because I won't be there for your heat."

"I know," Hobi answered, dragging his fingers up the legs that encircled him. "It's not a big deal. I have everyone else. It's not a big thing to me anymore. You need to focus on her."

"I love you, you know that?" 

"I do. And I love you too."

After quickly washing, the pair left the tub, lingering a bit longer over each other's bodies as they dried off before they fetched new pajamas. 

"Go on and be with her," Hoseok told him at the top of the stairs. "I'm gonna go put together something to eat, and I'll be there soon."

Yoongi slipped back into your room, quickly meeting the eyes of a very smug looking Jimin. 

"What?"

"Did you enjoy yourself?" Jimin asked as he petted down your arm. 

Yoongi scoffed. "Did you? Why are you both shirtless? Is she still asleep?" 

You moaned and turned a fraction toward his voice as he climbed back into the nest. 

"She took her shirt off herself and it seemed rude not to join her. She gave me a couple hickies, too, so now we really match. Isn't that right, sweet thing?" Jimin asked with a light pinch to your side. 

You giggled softly. "Mini nice."

"What did you do to her?" Yoongi asked with a smile as you turned to him with a bright, if dazed, one of your own. 

"Nothing. It's just the hormones. She seems to be enjoying all the touching."

You managed to move onto your knees, tottering a bit when the plug moved, but you kept it from slipping out. "No," you said with a cute but firm pout as you tugged at the hem of Yoongi's shirt. 

"You want my shirt off, too, princess?" Yoongi asked innocently. You nodded and continued to pull. "That's no problem." He tugged the garment over his head and threw it onto the chest where your extra blankets were stored. Then he grabbed you by the waist and pulled you against him. "Better?"

You nodded and maneuvered yourself into his lap, pushing him into a reclining position with you on his chest. 

"My alpha," you whispered after you rested your cheek against his shoulder. Yoongi's heart stuttered, feeling at once the weight and the joy of the trust you placed in him.

Fool. You let them make you feel safe. But they're just preparing you to breed. They'll need to know if you can handle it. Why else would Hobi be there? He needs a baby, and he's going to get it from you. 

You had awoken to a dark room. Your packmates slept beside you. Only a few hours ago had they decided they were ready to sleep and helped you get cleaned and ready for a good night's sleep. You'd kept the plug in for hours until you felt truly sated. But already you were feeling the emptiness ache at you. Your voices had no problem filling the void. 

Would that be the worst thing? I need it. Need alpha.

And when you fail? Will he still be your good alpha then? Or worse, what if you die this time?

"Stop it. Shut up!" You called out without thinking.

Yoongi, who had turned on his side away from you, flipped over in an instant. "What's wrong? What happened?" 

To his horror, you pulled away, just like you did your first time with them, until you collided with Jimin on your other side. "What do you want?"

Yoongi's voice softened in the darkness, although you couldn't see more than a shadowy figure. "Nothing, princess. Just want to make sure you're okay. Did you have a nightmare?"

"No."

A light clicked on behind you. Yoongi's features were soft but full of worry. He held his hands open to show you he wasn't a threat. But the dissonance of the danger your mind wanted you to fear and the gentle man in front of you made your head buzz. You struggled to make sense of what was real and what was your imagination. Was it possible that Yoongi was truly a good man who kept his promises and wouldn't hurt you? Or were your voices correct, warning you that his behavior was all to lure you into security so he could do what he wanted with you? Sometimes, your own brain could be your biggest enemy, but there was no denying that it often tried to keep you out of danger as well. 

Suddenly, you felt a hand on your shoulder, followed by soft lips on your warm back. You jerked away, scrambling backward and almost over the edge of the bed. Yoongi caught onto the only part of you he could reach, your leg, to keep you from falling. In the light, he could see that your eyes were the clearest they had been all day, and yet they were full of fear. Fear of them. He let go of you immediately. 

"Baby, everything is okay. You're safe. You're at home with us," he tried to ground you with his voice, afraid that touching you would make things worse. 

He could do it now. He'll push you down into the mattress and make you submit. And then he'll–

Yoongi watched you close your eyes as you tried to shut out the voices. He gotten better at recognizing when they filled your mind and confused you with paranoid thoughts. 

"Princess, listen to my voice." You opened your eyes to peer at him, and your gaze was heartbreaking. "I'm here, not them. They're only in your head. Tell me what they're saying."

Your lips trembled as you hesitated. It was the same thing he had heard a dozen times. The same thing you thought about every day. You didn't want to tell him again, but his words were a command, and you couldn't resist giving him an answer. 

"You're–" Your voice cracked from so much disuse and you cleared it to begin again. "You're making me f-feel safe but really y-you're preparing to breed me again."

Yoongi frowned but tried to squash his disappointment. He wanted nothing more than for you to trust him. He thought he'd done everything to prove he was worth it. But he should have known trauma wasn't so easy to erase. After all, it was the family that raised for sixteen years that first taught you to be wary of security. He took a steadying breath and looked you in the eye. 

"I made you a promise, Y/N. It was my first promise and I won't break it. Have I given you any reason to think I would?" You shook your head without hesitation. "Do you trust me?"

You wanted to. You were almost certain you did. You nodded your head. 

"Good. You can trust me. I know that these voices have tried to keep you safe in the past, based on your experiences. But this is not your past. It won't be the same, and if you trust me, you need to believe that."

You thought about his words for a moment, and they felt right. The past few weeks were like nothing you had experienced ever in your life. There had been so much safety, and honesty, and affection that it looked like something out of a fantasy. And maybe that's what made it so hard to believe in, but you knew that it was real. Yoongi was real, while the malicious whispers in your head were only that. They were less than air. 

Suddenly, you crawled forward, straight into Yoongi's chest. You felt his arms wrap around you immediately and began to weep. 

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I got confused. Don't be mad," you cried into the shelter of his body.

He shushed you as he held you tight, rubbing circles on your lower back with a firm hand. "It's okay, princess. I told you that I would always tell you what's real. What you feel now, my arms around you. This is real. Out here is real. Everything is okay."

Yoongi let you cry yourself out on his chest, unbothered by his damp shirt. Jimin cuddled close, too, wrapping an extra arm around your trembling figure to shield you from any more worry, if only for tonight.

A/n: Wow. It's been like, over a year since I wrote any smut, and I've been very anxious about it. I would love to hear any small thing you liked about any of this chapter. I think Hobi was the shining star of her heat, tbh. I love him an indescribable about.

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[mikaela-the-slut-expert]

Tea Shop

Xie Lian x M!reader x Hua Cheng

Y'all I've been thinking for ages how to make a two person scene a three person scene. What am I supposed to do, make two brides??? So if you have any ideas come bless me with them. 🫵🙃

Previous part: God of Song's second ascension

_____________________________________________

After you guide Xie Lian carefully out of the heavens so that he doesn't kill himself by accident . It takes a day to get to a tea shop. It could've taken longer, like three days but you saved yourselves sometimes. Since you can actually have spiritual prowess. The only reason it wasn't any quicker is because Xie Lian demanded you to not overwork yourself and use too much mana.

Xie Lian has always looked simple enough with plain, white robes. You on the other hand have to take on an 'avatar' you don't need anyone noticing you either. So you also dawn white robes, but of course a veil stays on.

You and Xie Lian sit at a table in the corner of the tea shop and you sit across from him. The two of you look over the scroll Ling Wen has given you... it isn't very helpful, but that's alright.

Both yours and Xie Lian's attention is captured by a silver butterfly. It flies across both of you and out the window. When you turn your head your heart almost drops out of your throat. Xie Lian is surprised as well to see two men sitting by you. One sat by you and the other sat by Xie Lian. There's only so much room on these benches after all.

You grimace at their presence. It's not hard to read the spiritual energy from them, they're obvious officials. You glare at them, Xie Lian is much kinder, "Oh uh who are you guys..?"

"Fu Yao" the one by you replies.

"Nan Feng" the one by Xie Lian replies.

You've never side eyed someone so hard in your endless years of life. At the 'Fu Yao' person beside you.

Ling Wen transmits a message to the two of you that they're volunteer officials. You huff inwardly. There's no way anyone from the upper court would offer their deputies from the middle court to help them.

That's because they aren't from the middle court though.

"Well I thank you for your help" Xie Lian says, quickly accepting their new guests.

"Which highnesses sent you?" You ask with narrowed eyes. You know they aren't deputies. Who are you to stress Xie Lian out more though, he already looks horrified when the officials answer his question.

"The palace of Nan Yang"

"The palace of Xuan Zhen"

"..."

Your glare only grows sharper. You've no clue why Mu Qing out of all people would want to help. You also have no idea why he would sit next to you of all people.

"Oh did your generals send you?" Xie Lian asks with a mouthful of tea.

"They didn't know we were coming" they answered in unison.

Xie Lian ponders for a moment, but you're quick to make the two squirm. Just because you can.

"Two officials from the lower court shouldn't go off without permission no? The trouble surely isn't worth it." Your eyes crinkle, as you smile at the two.

Lower court used to be what's now called the middle court. It was changed when whiny officials started complaining it made them seem trivial compared to officials in the upper court. To them an apparent mark to their honor. To you a pathetic attempt to seem important.

"..."

"..."

Your smile widens under your veil when they don't answer. What are they going to say? Their lack of words don't stop Fu Yao from glaring at you or from making Nan Feng squirm in his spot.

Xie Lian ever so kindly saves them, "Well do you know who we are?"

"You're his royal highness the crown prince and he's general /n"

"You're the justice of the mortal realm, the center of the world"

Mu Qing does not regard you at all and rolls his eyes when he answers.

Xie Lian chokes on his tea, "Did he just roll his eyes?"

" He did, tell him to scram" you and Nan Feng say together.

"Any official who was available was welcome to help so who are you to tell me to scram?" Fu Yao sneered. Again his words are only pointed at Nan Feng, not you.

"Ah well more help is better than none right?" Xie Lian smiles.

You sigh and all four of you go over the scroll together.

**********************************************************

Eventually it begins to get dark and all of you will need to find a place to sleep. Long ago, Xie Lian and you would sleep in the streets or on the ground. You put a stop to that. After becoming a powerful enough ghost and god you entreated yourself to your own palace. Not in the heavens though, you chose for it to be in the ghost realm. This was a while before Crimson Rain took over ghost city

Your palace just happened to be in close proximity to it and eventually ghosts started inhabiting themselves. Now all three realms call your palace, "The city of the lost". It's rarely talked about because well it's "lost" not many people find it, your city also doesn't cause trouble. It's just kinda there.

That is where you would usually go though but now you have two more officials with you and you'll be damned if you bring Mu Qing into your city.

"Why don't we find a temple of Nan Yang? I'm sure there's one around." You say, standing next to Xie Lian.

The four of you do eventually find one, it's a little run down but it's good enough. Your attention is dragged away when you notice a girl praying. A girl praying in a temple of Nan Yang? Makes you want to give your heart out.

You can't resist your temptations when Xie Lian asks why the temple has so many women worshippers. It's unusual for a martial god's temple after all. While Nan Feng feels the need to block the question, Fu Yao indulges it.

"I know what you want to ask, you want to ask why there's so many female worshippers right?"

You hold the urge to cackle, and lean in close to Xie Lian's ear. You happily ignore the two officials's glares. You whisper to him, "Xie Lian many women worship Nan Yang's temple so in the future their man will have... Good assets" you giggle into his ear.

For a martial god it isn't normal for many women to pray in their temples. Xie Lian was an exception because he was more of a ' feminine god ' depicted with lotus flowers. You were an exception because of femininity and because you're the God of song. The arts, like dance, drawing, and song were more partaken by women than men. Most martial gods don't have femininity, so rare for women's prayers.

You stay close to Xie Lian's side as Fu Yao judges the poor girl to pieces, calling her ugly. Xie Lian sighs, "You can't talk about girls like that Fu Yao" but you can tell Xie Lian is thinking the same thing. You snicker placing a hand on your hip.

Xie Lian notices a slash in the girl's dress, he tries to offer her his outer robe so that she can cover herself but of course she freaks out. She moves to slap Xie Lian but why would you just stand there? You grab her wrist and throw her to the side. 'throw' is an overstatement it was truly a nudge.

Once Xie Lian tells her she has a slash in her dress she finally accepts his robe and then runs out of the Temple.

Now Xie Lian's undressed. Bandages over his chest, and neck can be seen now. Nan Feng and Fu Yao stare in quiet shock. You on the other stare in admiration. Xie Lian is undeniably beautiful. You chuckle softly and remove your outer robe, unlike Xie Lian you have an under robe on. You move it over Xie Lian's shoulders.

"Should've let her run out with the slash in her dress. It's just like you to give the clothes off your back, A-Lian" you hum softly. Xie Lian smiles in thanks and puts on your robe.

He does look very pretty especially in your clothes.

**********************************************************

The next day all four of you go back to the tea shop. You aren't paying attention to the conversation about Mount Yunjin. You'd much rather pay attention to Wèizhī. The two birds hop around on the table and chirp away.

You decided to bring them today, simply because they bring you peace of mind. Of course they aren't only birds they're much more than that. Anyone would know if they're close to you, and they've seen the earring hiding behind your long hair.

Right now they're birds though and you'd much rather chirp away with the Magpies then pretend to chat with the officials next to you.

It isn't until loud drums and a gathered crowd outside has all four of you going outside to check it out. A line of men outside carrying a sedan is what the crowd is gathered for. As for the last inside the sedan... She looks like her neck has been snapped. It proves so when a fake head rolls to yours and Xie Lian's feet.

"Ew" you sneer and quickly kick it away. You assume whatever these mortals are doing is connected with the Ghost Groom. You stand to the side however as Wèizhī perches on your shoulders.

"If I was a ghost groom I'd kill the entire group for sending such an ugly thing to me" Fu Yao comments in disgust and rolls his eyes

"Fu Yao you aren't talking like an immortal should." Xie Lian said. "And can you fix that eye-rolling habit of yours? Why don't you set a small target for yourself first and only roll five days or something like that?"

" Set it fifty times a day and it still won't be enough!" Nan Feng yells

"Leave Fu Yao alone, if he rolls them hard enough maybe they'll fall out on their own." You add, with a snicker.

You're interrupted by yelling, one of the men in the group yelling about how it's useless and that they should just charge into Mount Yunjin and dragging an ugly freak out. They all hoot in agreement.

"Ugly Freak? Shopkeeper what are they talking about?" Xie Lian asks

The tea master explains, "The ghost groom has such an ugly appearance that no woman loves it, so he wears bandages around his face. That is why he kidnaps brides."

"Just because his face is wrapped in bandages doesn't mean it's ugly. There's a possibility it's so beautiful that it doesn't want others to see it, so he covers it up" Fu Yao says.

When Fu Yao quickly glances at you, you ignore. This isn't about you and you know that Fu Yao is truly a prick. No need to make something out of nothing.

Your group's attention is caught when the same girl from yesterday begging them not to go do anything dangerous and a man bitching at her because she refused to join them.

You don't care about anyone's affairs unless it has something to do with Xie Lian. You perk in attention when the man pushes the girl roughly, Xie Lian ever so kindly catches her.

Xie Lian uses Rou'ye to smack down the man and then just as quickly hides back in Xie Lian's sleeve. You snicker softly at the slumped man in the dirt. The man is not happy though, he's having none of it. He brandishes his sword and yells that Xie Lian is using wicked magic.

Nan Feng uses his palm to snap a wooden pillar of the tea shop and the group of men run in fear. You side eye Nan Feng. You have mixed opinions on him, but even after so long... "You're still just a brute dummy. You're paying for that" you smile behind the veil and return to Xie Lian's side.

The four of you eventually head back to the temple. With newly acquired information from Ling Wen, you now know that you're going to need a fake bride. However you can't use any mortals since it's a wrath level ghost.

"Well if we can't use women we'll have to use men" said Fu Yao.

"What man is going to want to dress up as a bride?" Nan Feng sighs.

The two suddenly have the same idea and look over to you and Xie Lian.

"???"

"No." You glare.

**********************************************************

Nighttime, the temple of Nan Yang.

You watch as Xie Lian walks from the back in a brides dress, hair down and flowing. You sigh into your hand. It doesn't look like a bride at all

Nan Feng has a more extreme reaction, "Fuck!" He just can't stand to see Xie Lian in a brides dress, it's awful.

Fu Yao scans Xie Lian with a complicated look.

"Do you have something you wish to say?" He asked

Fu Yao nodded "if someone sent a woman like this to me..."

"you'd kill the whole town was it?" You snicker.

"No I'd kill the woman." Fu Yao replied frigidly.

Xie Lian smiles, "Then thank goodness I'm not the woman."

You hum, "A-Lian let me help you, obviously these two have and never will see a bride in their lives" you smile, "not unless it's each other..." You mutter the last part out.

"Excuse me..." The four of them look at the voice. It's the girl from earlier. She has a white robe in her hand and stands with trepidation. "I've washed these clothes to return them to you and thank you so much for yesterday and today"

You see Xie Lian smiles in response but suddenly remembers his attire.

"Are you... if you want I can help?" She asks, no longer shy.

"No miss you misunderstand this isn't a hobby of mine" Xie Lian laughs nervously.

You on the other hand are happy with this development. "Yes! Come help us."

And so that began Xie Lian's makeover. The girl has a sewing kit on her and helps Xie Lian fit into his dress. You do Xie Lian's hair - you do it all the time anyways - and together the two of you do Xie Lian's makeup. After you're finished with him, he looks like a proper bride and a damn good one too. If you weren't a ghost there would be a blush on your cheeks.

__________________________________________________

Guys. If anyone has actually read all of these parts I need y'all to tell me if Y/n is making sense. 😭 Like do we understand the background and his character? Do we understand the b i r d s?

Time gap between here and first glance

First Glance

#hualian #hualian x reader #tgcf headcanon #hua cheng x reader #tgcf #tgcf x male reader #tgcf hua cheng #hua cheng #mu qing #fu yao #nan feng #feng xin #xuan zhen #nan yang #tgcf xie lian #xie lian x reader #xie lian #tgcf hualian #mxtx tgcf

[hellenhighwater]

Ooh, The Last Sequoia you're working on is really evocative for me. Part of my work two summers ago was helping with fuels reduction in a seqouia grove. 5 years after a hot fire killed more than half that grove. And months after the grove 10 miles away was saved from a big fire due to fuels reduction efforts the year before. I'm applying for a Masters program where I might be working on forest fire ecology... This is just to say that your painting isn't even done and it's making me Feel Things.

Thank you! I was thinking about this particular poem when I was working on it, it's stuck with me for years.

They will soon be down

To one, but he still will be For a little while    still will be stopping

The flakes in the air with a look, Surrounding himself with the silence Of whitening snarls. Let him eat The last red meal of the condemned

To extinction, tearing the guts

From an elk. Yet that is not enough For me. I would have him eat

The heart, and from it, have an idea Stream into his gnarling head That he no longer has a thing To lose, and so can walk

Out into the open, in the full

Pale of the sub-Arctic sun Where a single spruce tree is dying

Higher and higher. Let him climb it With all his meanness and strength. Lord, we have come to the end Of this kind of vision of heaven,

As the sky breaks open

Its fans around him and shimmers And into its northern gates he rises

Snarling    complete    in the joy of a weasel With an elk’s horned heart in his stomach Looking straight into the eternal Blue, where he hauls his kind. I would have it all

My way: at the top of that tree I place

The New World’s last eagle Hunched in mangy feathers    giving

Up on the theory of flight. Dear God of the wildness of poetry, let them mate To the death in the rotten branches, Let the tree sway and burst into flame

And mingle them, crackling with feathers,

In crownfire. Let something come Of it    something gigantic    legendary

Rise beyond reason over hills Of ice    screaming    that it cannot die, That it has come back, this time On wings, and will spare no earthly thing:

That it will hover, made purely of northern

Lights, at dusk    and fall On men building roads: will perch

On the moose’s horn like a falcon Riding into battle    into holy war against Screaming railroad crews: will pull Whole traplines like fibres from the snow

In the long-jawed night of fur trappers.

But, small, filthy, unwinged, You will soon be crouching

Alone, with maybe some dim racial notion Of being the last, but none of how much Your unnoticed going will mean: How much the timid poem needs

The mindless explosion of your rage,

The glutton’s internal fire    the elk’s Heart in the belly, sprouting wings,

The pact of the “blind swallowing Thing,” with himself, to eat The world, and not to be driven off it Until it is gone, even if it takes

Forever. I take you as you are

And make of you what I will, Skunk-bear, carcajou, bloodthirsty

Non-survivor.

Lord, let me die    but not die

Out.

James Dickey, “For the Last Wolverine” from The Whole Motion: Collected Poems 1945-1992.

[ineffablyruined]

A Game of Spy vs Spy

(Or is it more Mr. & Mrs. Smith?)

Buckle up, because this one's about to get a little.. out there? Maybe. You decide for yourselves. I had this thought at 3am and I couldn't get it out of my head.

This following is based on two assumptions:

1. Aziraphale has a Plan (capital letter included) - see my explanation of why I believe that's the case in this post.

2. Crowley has been working on his own Plan since he dawned there Tactical Turtleneck - see this brilliant post by @justhereforthemeta .

Putting the rest under a Read More because it's a little lengthy.

To summarize both in case you don't have time to read both posts:

1. I believe Aziraphale's scary smile in the elevator is a smile he learned from spending so much time around Crowley and that it's reflective of him coming up with a plan to avert the Second Coming that he thinks is so clever that Crowley would absolutely approve.

The fact that Crowley is seen wearing his Super Secret Spy Gear multiple times throughout the series means he's actively working on his heist. He's plotting, he's planning. He disappears on Aziraphale when the angel is remembering Job. Disappearing on Aziraphale? That's not like Crowley at all.

2. Crowley is so enamored with the spy life (bullet hole decals anyone?) that he begins plotting a heist as soon as he finds out the Book of Life is a threat to Aziraphale. And the turtleneck is his spywear.

Crowley saves Aziraphale. It's his thing. He's done it over and over, countless times throughout history.

But listen to what Aziraphale says. Rescuing me makes him so happy. Rescuing me.

And the times Crowley asked Aziraphale to run away with him? Well, those times, it wasn't Aziraphale's life that was threatened. It was Crowley's. Hell found out he screwed up the baby switch? They were coming for him, not Aziraphale. Armageddon't? Isn't it demons that burn in a fiery pit for eternity when the world ends, not angels?

My point is.. M' point is..

Crowley isn't asking Aziraphale to run away with him at the end of Episode 6 only to chance The Metatron erasing Aziraphale from the Book of Life when they get there.

Crowley already has the Book of Life.

My bet? He had a little side project up in Heaven with Muriel off-camera. He was wearing the beige turtleneck after all.

And when we leave Heaven?

Turtleneck gone. Mission accomplished.

But let's not stop there!

Because Aziraphale has a Plan of his own now that he's returned from Heaven. And I'm betting at least part of it involves the Book of Life. And when he goes to look for it? GONE! And when he checks the files? Sure enough, there's Crowley sneaking it into his pocket. (And if we get an "Oh Good Lord" repeat at seeing Crowley's Heaven outfit, I'm not going to complain).

Alternatively, Heaven is going to find it missing, and they're going to know it was Crowley who took it and Aziraphale has to get it back to try to save Crowley.

Either way, he's going to have to get it.

And I'm betting Mr. BackOnHisOwnSide Crowley isn't going to be too forthcoming when the Supreme Archangel asks for it back.

And let the Spy vs Spy hijinks commence.

..................

Below is one conversation I've dreamed up in my head about all this, if you're into that kind of thing. Enjoy:

Crowley: If only I had access to a place with a truly ridiculous number of old books where one new addition would go completely unnoticed.

Aziraphale: Well, it's a good thing I know this bookshop better than anyone then, isn't it?

Crowley (bearing his teeth): I've reorganized.

Aziraphale: *gasp*

#good omens meta #meta or crack? #I'm not really sure at this point #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #good omens #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable husbands #good omens speculation #go3 speculation

[magicalmanhattanproject]

okay im insane in the head again time for more 2b2t worldbuilding

so a way long time ago now, baghera and fit had a conversation where baghera said she didn't know who the good guys and bad guys are anymore and fit just sort of agreed with her. using my massive genius brain that knows fit's cubito better than fit himself does, i have deduced that he was lying

the idea of "good guys" and "bad guys" isn't something that 2b2t puts much stock in. it doesn't hold much weight in a world where the whole point is that it's every man for himself and griefers and hackers have free reign.

instead, interpersonal relationships function on a simple matrix. are you with me or are you against me? can i trust you or not? that's how you decide who to break bread with, who to let into your base, who to fight alongside and who to stab in the back

first question you may have: how do you figure out who you can trust? well, that's the million dollar question, isn't it? the way fit explains it, it depends mostly on what you need to trust them for. take fit himself. he's a pretty standup guy, by 2b2t standards. he's a straight shooter, for hte most part. doesn't backstab much (it doesn't count if you have good reason to think they'd backstab you first, by the way). everyone on 2b2t knows he'll take your secrets to your grave if you ask him to. everyone knows he won't take them any farther than that. what can he say? he likes the fofoca

if you want a guy who can tell your story to the world and make sure you aren't forgotten in the writhing sea of chaos, he's your guy. if you want someone who will never breathe a word of it, he's really not.

consistency is king in the world of chaos "sure, i betrayed him, but i'd never betray you" is the sort of line to get you betrayed first. you either split your loyalties between a bunch of warring factions and hope they never go to war (they will) or you put all your eggs in one basket while the farmer is having a mental break and throwing egg baskets out of the truck at random. or you do what fit does and eschew strength in numbers entirely and dangle yourself like a juicy steak in front of every roving band waiting to prey on lone travelers

you do what fit does and get good at cutting your losses and going to ground

these are the facts: you are being watched. you cannot shake your pursuers. there is no strength to be found in numbers. there is no safety to be found alone. there is no such thing as an ally

these are the facts: if you name a mob, it will die. if you don't name a mob, it will die anyway.

these are the facts: your son, your beautiful boy made in heaven by god himself, only got two things from spreen. a (pretty nice, to be fair) basement roller coaster and a name.

these are the facts: you are not strong enough to keep ramón alive on your own. you are not strong enough to let him die.

these are the facts: if you place a block at your feet, an end crystal won't do enough damage to kill you. this fact will save your life. it won't save your arm as the lavacast topples down on you.

these are the facts: cutting yourself free from the rubble will hurt. it is human nature to avoid pain. you hope that if you wait long enough, someone will come along and save you.

these are the facts: no one will.

the way things work on 2b2t, fit will tell anyone who cares to listen, is that you always trust that people will be untrustworthy. everyone is a traitor and a backstabber and everyone knows it. you don't have to bother trying to figure out who's a good guy or a bad guy.

#sorrelposting #qsmp #qsmp fitmc #fitmc #my writing #welp this one got away from me a little bti #idk somethign about fit just make my brain get squeezed like squeaky toy

[kachuusha]

I have reasons to believe that levi may have truly thought of living together with hanji back in ch126, based on his own monologue in ch136:

before hanji said "maybe we should just live here together, right levi?" in ch 126, hanji expressed the feeling of being trapped and that they've reached seemingly reached their limit.

"sounds like our time has come. you might feel like you're doing the right thing, but times change and you find yourself in a cell."

at this moment, I think hanji felt that their time as scouts may have already come to an end. hence, they thought of leaving everything behind to start anew (together with levi)

similarly with levi in ch136, he asks what if their roles had already ended way back then? when they got those brats to the sea?

both hanji and levi had a period of uncertainty regarding their duties as members of the survey corps. which I think is reasonable because while hanji and levi both have a strong sense of duty, they are still humans nonetheless.

I think it may have been possible levi was on the same track as hanji in 126, just that we never saw his direct pov in the forest. I get the impression that he might've thought of agreeing with them, BUT things take another turn after they got summoned in the paths by eren.

they learn that eren has activated the rumbling and this may have served as a sign to levi and hanji that their roles aren't over yet. humanity still needs them.

which leads us to this conversation:

it's not that levi was rejecting hanji (like I've been saying, I believe he might've agreed with them if eren never activated the rumbling), it's just that he knew hanji would never sit back while countless of lives are getting slaughtered. their roles are not done yet. if they let this happen, the sacrifices their comrades had made would be put in pain.

and it does follow the pattern of levi's monologue because he continues with this:

and hanji in 127 says this:

again, basically, both levi and hanji did have a period where they hesitated with their roles, hanji had a direct dialogue addressing it ("I was the one trying to run away"), but it circles back to their duties as scouts, the world getting flattened isn't what their comrades has devoted their lives for so they must protect it. they are going to save humanity or whatever's left of it. they can't just run away and take that brief moment of peace just for themselves.

also as hanji puts it "I feel the eyes of my comrades on me." "almost all of them died without ever knowing that humanity existed outside the wall". hanji likely felt guilty over the fact that they thought of choosing peace for themself when their comrades had devoted their lives over their own personal desires. and I'm guessing it is the same for levi.

(just to add this here, there is actually something even sadder behind levi's monologue. but it's too long to discuss it here.)

also, I think someone might ask, but what about levi fulfilling the promise he made with erwin back in shiganshina? would he still run away when he needs to do that? okay I have this guess that levi had already come into terms that he failed:

in the forest, levi admits to himself that he screwed up. and later during the battle of heaven and earth, he says "I've never bungled one of his orders. not even once. and yet for some reason, his final order is the kne that I just can't."

but you might ask, "he is still looking for zeke tho when he woke up?", and I think that's because of his newfound resolve, which is to stop the rumbling once and for all. it's likely that levi realized that this isn't only about the lives that were sacrificed in shiganshina anymore, the predicament they are facing at the moment is much larger in scale. and I think both knew that to activate the powers of the founding titan, eren would need his brother. so yes it does fall back to zeke, and then there's hanji's hypothesis (that levi himself brought up) that they may have to kill zeke to stop the rumbling.

there's also this detail back in 126 where hanji said "I'm sure you want revenge but right now..." and then levi proceeds with "if we keep running and hiding...what will that get us."

thing is, levi doesn't agree about taking revenge or what not. what he probably just had in mind then was to stop zeke and the rumbling, which is what he also assumes that hanji had in mind hence "I know you, you can't stay out of the action" to which hanji agrees.

and I think all these, adds weight to levi's motivation in attempting to hold hanji back from leaving in 132. it's not the same thing with erwin back in shiganshina where levi ultimately gave the call for him. hanji's decision has been made so why else would levi get in their other than to try and change their mind? and it wasn't likely over something like "we still need your leadership". levi addresses hanji as "four-eyes", therefore dropping any sense of formality (I know levi never stricly complied with using titles and honorifics but he stopped calling hanji with that nickname after RTS), which possibly hints to levi addressing hanji in a personal level. he is not asking hanji as the captain of the survey corps, but rather simply as levi who shares a deep personal bond with hanji. and if we take into account the points made above, the levi who also wanted to share a life with hanji.

but even before levi could draw any words out of him, hanji went ahead to say "you understand.", "just let me go will you?", which sounds to be a reference to levi's "I know you" back in the forest. likely to remind levi that they both made their decision then and this isn't the appropriate time to look back.

as you can tell, levi is obviously against the idea of hanji dying. when hanji parotted the same words erwin did in shiganshina, levi was visibly upset over it. interestingly enough, that was hanji's response to levi's "unrequited love for titans" line that has been thoroughly discussed by japanese fans that may have been holding certain nuances such as levi implying that hanji's feelings are requited by someone (possibly him). we can also connect this to the feelings he may have inwardly thought back in 126 but never got the chance to say out loud. but suddenly asks if levi thinks their comrades are watching them? again, probably in reference to hanji's words to jean and mikasa in 127 when they seem to be expressing guilt over the fact that they had thought of running away (taking their own personal peace), when their comrades died without even knowing about the truth beyond the walls. "I feel the eyes of all of my comrades on me". it's a bit similar to when erwin said this before when he was thinking of his own desire of seeing the basement, above his own duties as commander. so I guess we can say if erwin's personal desire was his childhood dream to uncover the truth found at the basement of eren's house, for hanji it was to live in peace (with levi).

the "live together in peace" trope had been used several times in aot and often with the strongly implied ships. but I think levi and hanji's were meant to directly mirror eren and mikasa's. note that I don't think that their dynamics as a ship are the same, it's different I tell you. but there are narrative points between them that appears to be tied? I think the fate of those two pairs are intertwined in a tragic fate? because as long as eren decides to activate the rumbling, hanji would definitely form the alliance to stop it and it would eventually lead to their death. eren had always meant to leave mikasa and his friends because of his plan to go forth with the rumbling, therefore negating the possibility of that reality of him running away with mikasa. and in turn, hanji (and levi) wouldn't have ran away as well back when they were in the forest because they would stop eren and his plans. (I actually have a separate post for this so I'm not gonna get into details now. )

in the end while levi and hanji's relationship lacked an outright label, I think there were enough hints that strongly imply that it had taken a romantic turn at some point. solidified by their (mutual) wish to stay together. it's a tragic tale between two people who devoted their hearts for others and sacrificed their own personal wishes.

#levihan #aot #mine

[yabakuboi]

small part of a bigger wip i don't think i'll ever fully flesh out but i like it so i wanted to share. very loosely based on franchises like halo, alien, portal, etc.

Steve steps through the portal like a god descending from the heavens, straight backed and powerful, even as he's dragging Dustin kicking and screaming away from the chaos just on the other side.

"I won't leave him," Dustin is screaming.

Robin doesn't know if she's ever heard a more inhuman sound, the way grief and rage has twisted Dustin's voice into something other. And Robin's entire life has been dedicated to new and untouched worlds, to the pursuit of everything alien and non-human.

"Let me go, Steve, let me go! I won't leave him, fuck, fuck you, I WON'T LEAVE HIM! EDDIE! EDDIE!" Robin watches the way he digs his fingernails into the exposed skin at Steve's neck, unprotected by his suit, drawing blood with each rake of his fingers.

Steve is unfazed, his eyes hard and intense as he drags Dustin towards the quarantine doors. Robin can't hear what he says to Dustin, even when Dustin screams back.

"I HATE YOU."

It hurts her, because she knows how it's no doubt hurting Steve, even as he shoves Dustin through the air lock, sealing him behind glass and silencing his screams.

Steve should have gone through too, but Robin knows him. It's why she hasn't closed the portal yet, why she hasn't moved from her station to do damage control, to log the losses:

Crew Member Eddie Munson — KIA

She watches Steve instead, as he picks up his saber and weaponry again, pulling it over his shoulder as he steps back up to the platform, the static electricity of the portal arching up to meet him, like fingers begging to draw him through.

He stops though, and Robin could cry—unsurprised and still grateful that he treats her to one last look. It says everything and nothing, because nothing needs to be said, not between the two of them.

I love you. I'll miss you. I'll come back to you, in this life or the next.

And then Steve turns, and steps through the portal. Robin cuts the contact as he goes, killing the link between them with a sob tearing through her chest. She adds him into the mental log in her list:

First Lieutenant Steve Harrington — KIA

She only allows herself the barest moment to grieve before she moves. The entire ship will be cut off and isolated soon, until central command can guarantee the ship isn't infected. She only has so much time to get to a rescue pod. She only has so much time until Nancy—

"Robin."

Robin doesn't slow her pace, even as Nancy catches up to her, her hand on Robin's wrist. She doesn't let Nancy turn her away, doesn't let her slow her down.

"You can't," Nancy says, hisses, her ire hiding her own grief. Nancy always turns emotion into cold rage. "He's gone, Robin. You can't save him."

"I can," Robin snaps, snarling when Nancy sighs, like Robin is some overemotional child.

"Do I really mean so little to you?"

"That's the difference between us," Robin says, ripping her arm from Nancy's fingers. She turns on the heel of her boot, and it's the first time that she's ever dared to look down her nose as Nancy, Nancy who she loves, love to hold, to kiss, to touch. Her Commander off-world. "Between Steve and the rest of us. You've got everyone sorted so easy in your head, each one ranked higher than the other, who you can and can't live without."

"Robin—"

"And I do, too," Robin admits, teeth grinding together, the fear and sadness burning a hole through her chest, yawning wide and wider and threatening to consume her. "I do, too, and I can't live without him.

"But Steve? Steve would die for any of us, every one of us, even your fucking brother who already left him for dead once."

Nancy gapes at her, her pretty face pale and her eyes red.

"Steve would die for me a thousand times," Robin tells her, her voice wobbling, the righteousness bleeding from her mouth like an open wound, leaving on the anxiety, the fear. "And he'll die for Eddie a million times.

"But I'm not going to let him. I'm going to go get them both and bring them home and fuck you if you think you can stop me."

Nancy stares. Says nothing.

And Robin leaves.

#stranger things #steddie #ronance #stobin #dustin meets her at the pod and they go rescue their guys who are surviving together alone on a hostile planet #(this story would have been an excuse to do survivalist steddie cuddling for warmth but like scifi flavored) #dw nancy isn't far behind she's bringing the firepower and ronance makes up #blows a kiss to the stars #gimme inspiration to finish things pls #shush mal #my fic #dribble drabble #my steddies

[ineffable-endearments]

Trying to picture where Crowley goes from the end of S2 and it looks like this to me:

Sticking around Soho: I have read lots of fic and seen lots of art for this premise that I love. However, if I'm going to try to guess where actual canon might go, this option seems both too painful for him as a character and too stagnant for the story. Like, wasn't the point of the beginning of the season that he had stagnated? It feels like the Final Fifteen was the cataclysm that had finally broken that stagnation. Something about the flow of Crowley staying in or near Soho, or his Mayfair apartment, for that matter, doesn't seem right.

Going off to live his own solitary life, like as a hermit or as a snake in a cave or something: Seems way too boring for Crowley. He needs things to do.

Going off to live in a human community: This could happen. I could see him living in a human community that he wants to protect from the Second Coming. But it seems a little too healthy and well-adjusted for the climax of the story's conflict, right? No? Maybe? I think we see many signs that Crowley is moving in this direction in Season 2, but he might not quite be there yet. Or he could be! I started off thinking this probably isn't it because it felt too easy, but there's a bit of poetry to the Serpent establishing his very own Garden that he wants to protect and, after everything is said and done, accepting a lost angel into it. Er, maybe that's a bit too sugary or uneven. Idk. I'm rambling.

Going back to Hell to become a "proper" demon: Lol.

Going back to Hell to fight against Heaven: Mmmmaybe? My main problem with this is the fact that the strings in Hell are ultimately pulled by the same people/person who run things in Heaven (the Metatron?), and while I'm not sure he's explicitly said anything about it in the show yet, I think Crowley is savvy enough to figure that out. So rejoining Hell simply to abide by their rules and start another war does not seem exactly right. One of his primary points in the Final Fifteen was that you can't fight an oppressive system by cooperating with it, and in the end, Hell is cooperating with the system as much as Heaven is. I guess we could assume Crowley hasn't quite figured it out yet, and his discovery of who's really in charge could be a plot point.

Going back to Hell to agitate the demons to revolt: This feels pretty good to me. Whether it's by taking on a position of authority and secretly feeding a resistance or by taking advantage of the chaos to establish an openly-rebellious group, I feel like Crowley could do this. It feels right for a moment of high conflict because it would involve significant character growth - Crowley choosing to embark on a mission to save the world instead of haphazardly getting thrown into it. However, since he'd be actively working to undermine Hell and would have to figure out where he belongs if the system does indeed collapse, encouraging resistance would not, on its own, get him to where he needs or wants to be. There would still be plenty of room for change and growth.

Maybe, if Crowley tempts his fellow demons to enjoy Earth things like Aziraphale does, he could slowly get them working toward stopping any future Armageddons just because they, too, have found things they like on Earth. Encouraging demons to enjoy Earth would potentially give Crowley a chance to work with more humans. It would also give him a chance to work toward one goal (Hell saves Earth?) only to accidentally accomplish another (demons discover free will).

Mandatory acknowledgment that I could be COMICALLY wrong here.

#go s2 spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #good omens #go3 speculation

[sparkplug02]

Good Omens Season 3: I forgive you

I've seen the theory that, in the final fifteen minutes of Season 2, Episode 6, Aziraphale was trying to signal to Crowley that something was wrong and was lying for the first part of that conversation (someone, don't remember who, made a point about how Aziraphale makes more hand motions when he's hiding something). Crowley missed the signs and that led to further miscommunication, etc.

I don't really think this is the case. I think the character development potential for Aziraphale and Crowley to learn from this makes more sense.

However,

IF Aziraphale were trying to signal Crowley, I can only imagine what Crowley's reaction would be upon realizing this and realizing that he missed those signals and that the conversation ended the way it did instead of getting the message. If Aziraphale was trying to say "help, the Metatron is listening and I have to bullshit my way through this, please improvise with me on this to save both of us from immediate danger" and Crowley took it as "I'm throwing away everything we've worked for since Notmaggedon and abandoning you," the Crowley's response of "how could you do this, I'm not going to help you" is maybe not ideal.

I can just imagine Crowley realizing what Aziraphale really mean, realizing that he said 'no,' to that, and that he left Aziraphale when he was asking for help. Crowley might feel guilty about that, and I can imagine a bit of shouting at the sky (possibly in the rain), and let's just say, for dramatic effect, of course, that this realization comes at a high-stakes moment. Something about "always too late."

Until he remembers the last thing Aziraphale said to him before he walked out: "I forgive you."

Not for the kiss (definitely not for the kiss, nothing to forgive there). Not for being a demon or refusing to go to Heaven. No, no, none of that.

Crowley has saved Aziraphale hundreds of times, and this one time, arguably when it might have mattered the most, Crowley missed the signs (again, I don't think this is actually the case, but go with me on this). If this high-stakes moment presented some kind of danger to Aziraphale or a large step closer to the end of the world, then Crowley would probably blame himself for whatever happened or might have happened to Aziraphale. He might think that Aziraphale would hate him for refusing to help when he asked for it and needed it.

But Aziraphale might have known this would happen too. He would have known that Crowley would blame himself since he's been told ever since his Fall that he is in the wrong. Aziraphale, knowing and hoping that the conversation in the bookshop wouldn't be their last but would have to suffice until they met and spoke again, spoke to a future Crowley. Crowley who realized the hidden meaning of his act after talking with the Metatron. Crowley who was bearing the approaching end of the world alone because they were truly separated for the first time in six thousand years. Crowley who blamed himself for anything that might have happened. Not bookshop Crowley, who hadn't gotten there yet.

Bookshop Crowley said "Don't bother."

Future Crowley, threatening to break under the weight of his new discovery, would remember that preemptive forgiveness when he needed it most. He might need it to believe that they still have a chance, that despite being separated they are still on THEIR side, not Heaven's or Hell's. This isn't over. This was the plan, to a certain extent. Maybe Crowley didn't recognize it at first, but he's caught up now and they have work to do.

And maybe Aziraphale's reaction to Crowley's confession was just a cover. As soon as this is all over, maybe they can try again.

#good omen #good omens season 2 #good omens season 3 #ineffable husbands #aziraphale #crowley #metatron #the metatron #final fifteen #good omens 2x06

[shelbgrey]

Alex karev x reader

Alex breaking up with you when he finds out your pregnant but the get back together after baby’s born

( don’t see a lot of Alex on her I really try to find fics)

Heaven(Alex Karev)

Paring: Alex Karev x Reader

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Got a picture of your house

And you're standing by the door

It's black and white and faded

And it's looking pretty worn

We were just stupid kids, that's all we were... At least in his eyes. When we first met he was rude and conceeted. That's what everyone else saw, but to me he was the kindest person I ever met.

See the factory that I worked

Silhouetted in the back

The memories are gray, but man, they're really coming back

Like every Seattle Grace love story we met at the hospital during our intern year. We worked hard and fought for surgeries, but behind closed doors he was a man after my heart.

I didn't care for him much at first, he was just as much as a man whore as Mark Sloan. I would dodge his Flurting and honestly kind remarks. But he had his STD nurse and at the time I could careless about love.

But he never gave up. He fell fist but I fell harder.

I don't need to be the king of the world

As long as I'm the hero of this little girl

I don't think he'll ever know this, but he saved me. He saved me from it all and he was my hero. He took me away from the reality that was our jobs. We were each other's heros and it didn't matter we came from broken homes. Being with him was like my own personal heaven. I loved the way he'd always make me laugh no matter how upset I was.

I remember he'd always stay with me during the late hours in the hospital. It didn't matter how many hours he'd worked that day he was there. He'd fight his tired eyes and stick with me if I had to watch and take care of the babies in the nursery.

Heaven isn't too far away

Closer to it everyday

No matter what your friends might say

But every heaven has its demons.

I knew how my friends felt about him. We had the same friends but we all knew how he was. George couldn't understand our relationship at all, he'd except it but could never grasp why I chose him.

Meredith supported us from the start. She knew Alex was rough around the edges but she knew we loved each other.

I never cared what they thought because for the first time in a long time I was happy.

How I love the way you move

And the sparkle in your eyes

There's a color deep inside them

Like blue suburban sky

He would always say how much he loved my eyes. So many late nights of us staring into each others eyes. I often wonder if our kids would have his eyes or mine.

When I come home late at night

And you're in bed asleep

I wrap my arms around you

So I can feel you breathe

The bed didn't feel like my own anymore and I couldn't get myself to sleep on his side of the bed. I remember late nights when he'd craw into bed and wrap his arms around me thinking I was asleep. I lied in the bed that we feel into eternal bliss in. The bed should held a special intament moment, but now it's cold and hard. I'd often toss and turn unable to sleep while the only thing left of him was small piece of him.

I don't need to be a superman

As long as you will always be my biggest fan

Heaven isn't too far away

Closer to it everyday

He didn't have to be anything more than he already was. He was perfect in my eyes. No matter what we did we always support each other. It felt like heaven anytime we were talking about anything that wasn't medical.

No matter what your friends might say

We'll find our way, yeah

I know no one could wrap their head around the fact we were together. George couldn't and neither could Derek. George had it in his head he'd hurt me and in the beginning Derek thought he wasn't good enough. But Merdith loved the fact we we're together and supported since day one. But I didn't care what are friends had to say he treated me like a queen and I loved him.

Memories come rushing back and makes it pretty hard

I've got nowhere left to go

And no one really cares

I don't know what to do

But I'm never giving up on you

I thought I was dreaming when I woke up and saw him holding our child. It felt too go to be true as he rocked our son in the corner of my hospital room.

This would go on for days as I recovered and I could understand was this, "why now?" and he made it quite clear he wasn't gonna give up.

I was Comforting knowing he wasn't gonna give up on his son. He was not his father and that's a promise. But I couldn't trust him now after all he did was run when things got serious.

Heaven isn't too far away

Closer to it every day

No matter what your friends say

I know it's gonna find a way

During those nine months heaven was gonna and it was nothing but darkness, purgatory if you would. But Alex never gave up. He was an amazing father and held his son if he got scared and made him laugh if he was sad. Our son would grow up in a home I always dreamed of. A home full of light and happiness. Our son grew up in a home he could look forward to come home to everyday after school. And he could see his parents not only loved him but loved each other.

#alex karev x reader #alex karev imagines #alex karev #Greys anatomy #Greys anatomy imagines #greys anatomy imagines #greys anatomy x reader #greys anatomy headcanons #Song imagines #Song one shots.

[the-ineffable-cross]

Vampire Empire by Big Thief from the lens of Good Omens (Mainly Crowley)

This will be a massive post so I'M SO SORRY

BUT I LOVE THIS SONG AND I'M SO EXCITED TO DO THIS AHHHH

Lyrics are in red like this

LETS BEGIN HEHEHEHEHE

(I will skip the parts of the songs that are repeated UNLESS they have a new meaning in relation to other parts of the song)

The song has a whole meaning but my brain is going psycho with how AziraCrow this is

Watching TV tired, bleeding on the bed The milk has just expired, all the leaves are dead I'm not quiet, you've been quiet, just receiving what you said Reeling, feeding, feeling, filled by everything you fed

In my mind I view this section as a lot like how I envision Crowley after Ineffable Divorce the argument at the end of season 2. The line about leaves represent that Crowley has not energy to continue taking care of his plants seeing as his best friend (read: one true love) has left Earth. Line three is talking about how he has gotten no word from Aziraphale, he's quiet. But Crowley isn't. He's rambling, yelling, screaming about his absence. He's getting into fights and god hes tired.

I see you as you see yourself through all the books you read Overwhelmed with guilt and realizing the disease

Crowley sees Aziraphale through the veil of his books now because what else does he have to remember him by? He left nothing behind but his books, bookstore and old memories turned sour.

The second line represents that after Aziraphale goes back up to heaven, overwhelmed with his guilt for what happened and over time realising that 'the disease' is the mentality (Wars are meant to be won, not avoided) both heaven AND hell have.

You give me chills, I've had it with the drills

I see this as Crowley talking to both Heaven and Hell. In this scenario, drills is armageddon/the end of earth. He talks about how both 'give him chills' and hes done with both of them and the 'drills' which can represent the repeated attacks on Earth and it describes them as militaristic drills: exhausting, repetitive, and taxing.

I'm nothing, you are nothing, we are nothing with the pills I am empty 'til she fills, alive until she kills

Here, I view this as Crowley talking to Aziraphale. Pills can be a metaphor for heaven and the last line "I am empty 'til she fills, alive until she kills" can be Crowley mocking God's way of operating and controlling the angels as well as the angels dependence on god and their lack of free will.

In her vampire empire, I am Falling, yeah Falling, yeah

In this part, the vampire empire can be seen as a metaphor for heaven and 'her' can be seen as God. This passage, in my mind, is about Crowley's fall (obviously, considering the "Falling, yeah" bits)

I see you there, rejecting all your earthly power

Crowley realising that Aziraphale has to reject the human parts of himself in order to remain in heaven once he gets there and mourning the loss of something he loved about Aziraphale

Protecting and dissecting 'til you've emptied every hour

Crowley protecting his heart with the vices of alcohol and cigarettes constantly without hesitation and spending his days dissecting each hour of his time with Aziraphale, wondering if they were TRULY friends or Azi just stayed because of pity.

We jumped into the pond and then come under the shower You lay upon my pillow and you open like a flower

This first line can mean that Aziraphale and Crowley both jumped head first into trying to save Earth and the world (the pond) and them came under the wrath of both Heaven and Hell (the shower). But it could also represent how they jumped headfirst into each other when they began collaborating (pining).

The second line talks about how Aziraphale came into Crowley's view on Earth and Crowley watched him blossom, away from heaven and with him, for 6000 years.

I wanted to see you naked, I wanted to hear you scream Wanted to kiss your skin and your everything

This is about Crowley thinking about Aziraphale after he leaves for heaven but every thought is laced with regret and what he wanted (he still wants it) but could never have.

I wanted to be your woman, I wanted to be your man I wanted to be the one that you could understand

The first line is Crowley yelling at Aziraphale (genderfluid Crowley supremacy) and the second line is Aziraphale's answer. Crowley wants Aziraphale and Aziraphale wants Crowley to understand why he is going back up to heaven and believes he doesn't (he understands. more than Aziraphale).

[A REPEAT SECTION]

Well, I walked into your dagger for the last time It's like trying to start a fire with matches in the snow Where you can't seem to hold me, can't seem to let me go So I can't find surrender and I can't keep control

This passage talks about how Crowley feels about Aziraphale's betrayal. He declares that that was the last time he'll walk into the 'dagger' of Aziraphale's and he knows that its futile because he's grown to love him too much and wont be able to leave him forever.

He talks about how Aziraphale cant seem to truly be his but can't let him go, out of love or pity? Crowley doesn't know. Because of this, Crowley can't truly open himself up fully to Azi but he can't control himself around in in the way that when you truly love someone, you want to tell them everything and it divides him so much.

You turn me inside out, and then you want me outside in You spin me all around, and then you ask me not to spin

Crowley talking to Aziraphale (or yelling up at the sky and acting as if he's talking to God) about the unrealistic expectations held of both him and Aziraphale and how they both know they neither of them can live up to them.

You say you wanna be alone and you want children You wanna be with me and you wanna be with him

Crowley ranting to Aziraphale about the hypocrisy of his actions. Aziaphale wants to stay on Earth BUT he also wants to go up to heaven. Aziraphale wants to stay with Crowley but he ALSO wants to be with 'him' (the angels, Metatron, God, etc. etc.). He'd yell about how irrational it is, how he can't have both but he can have neither and it will end up that way if he isn't careful.

[A REPEAT SECTION]

Falling, yeah Falling, yeah Falling, yeah Falling, yeah

-THE END-

This part represents Crowley's spiral after Aziraphale left because:

a. his best friend is gone

b. his one true love is gone

and c. he thinks his best friend hates him

THIS TOOK ME, LIKE, 3 AND A HALF HOURS TO WRITE HOLY SHIT

#Cross' Ineffable Plan #these fucking ineffable dumbasses #THIS TOOK TOO LONG OML #crowly x aziraphale #azicrow #aziraphel #aziraphale x crowley #aziracrow #aziraphale #azirowley #anthony j crowley #crowley #good omens 2 #good omens #good omens rant #good omens season 3 #gomens #crowley and aziraphale #ineffable husbands #ineffable divorce #good ineffable omens #ineffable idiots #ineffable spouses #genderfluid crowley #Vampire Empire - Big Thief #vampire empire #Big Thief #good omens analysis #song analysis #good omens angst

[castieldelamancha]

Dean wakes up suddenly, his heart threatening to beat out of his chest, he struggles to get his breathing under the control and he shivers, his sweaty skin cooling down as the covers pool down at his lap.

"Dean?"

The worried call for him is followed by a hand pressing against his sternum, another one finding his shoulder blade.

"It was a bad dream, that's all, you are okay." Dean takes a deep, shuddering breath, he knows it was a dream, but it had felt so real anyway, "that's it," Castiel takes one of his hands, his fingers carefully closing around Dean's wrist and pressing his palm against his own chest, mirroring the way Castiel was touching him just a moment ago, "breathe with me."

He takes in another breath, it's easier this time around, as he follows the fall and rise of Castiel's chest, steady, solid, "you weren't there." He says, and he knows it doesn't make any sense, but Castiel simply listens, moving them around a bit, he leans back against the headboard and, using the arm he has around Dean's shoulder, he gently gets him to lay down against him, his head on Cas' shoulder.

"I am here."

Dean doesn't seem to hear him, still slightly agitated, "I was dying, a hunt gone wrong," he huffs out a bitter laugh, what a fucking ridiculous way to go, especially after saving the world, "vampires, I think, it's all getting kind of fuzzy now," he frowns, Castiel scratches his scalp, lightly, " Sammy was there, and I was dying, Cas, and I," he clears his throat, "I died, I guess?" Castiel's hand finds the one Dean has on his chest, he interlaces their fingers together.

"Nothing of it was real." Dean wonders if this is a reminder for him or if Cas is also talking to himself.

"I know that, but I was in Heaven, and Bobby was there," Castiel hums, "and it's like you hadn't come back after we took care of Chuck," and Dean reminds himself Castiel did, in fact, come back to him, that it all happened years ago, and that, ever since then, they have been together. "You weren't waiting for me."

Castiel kisses the top of his head, and Dean has calmed down already, but he isn't in a rush to break this embrace, even if he feels a bit guilty for keeping Cas awake, "see? That's how you know it was a dream, I would have done everything I could to save you, and if I had failed to do so I would have made sure to be the one to welcome you."

Dean nuzzles Castiel's shoulder, "I know," he mutters, "I know you would." He adds, more firmly, completely convinced of what he is saying, his faith in Cas unwavering.

Castiel's hand leaves him, his fingers closing over his chin instead, tilting his head up, tenderly, Dean looks up at him and Castiel searches his face for a moment, looking deep into his eyes, "we are together now," he presses a kiss to his forehead, "I love you" another kiss, right between his eyes, "always" he kisses his lips, a brief thing that warms Dean to the core.

"Love you too, Cas."

#now that's how i would fix spn to bring it back huh #destiel #thanks for coming to my ted talk #fix it fic #ficlet #vanessa writes ✨ #post finale #post s15

[finethingswellworn]

The thing about Crowley is that he is, one-hundred percent, a complete and total pushover when it comes to Aziraphale. I mean, look at the way he folded when Aziraphale asked/informed that he'd be taking the Bentley. Look at the way he greeted Aziraphale after the fights in seasons one and two.

Crowley holds grudges, yes, but never against Aziraphale.

Now, obviously this fight is different. This fight, Crowley put his whole heart on the line, their whole relationship on the line, practically begged Aziraphale to call it what it was, to finally choose him.

And Aziraphale couldn't. Not yet.

And that's new and old at the same time. Because Crowley's always pushed Aziraphale, always gone too fast, but he's always waited, too, when Aziraphale asked.

To earn Crowley's forgiveness, Aziraphale needs to prove to Crowley that they're on the same page, once and for all. That their exactlys mean the same thing. And that's going to require Aziraphale to confront everything he's been pushing down for all these years.

But here's where I have hope for a relatively quick reunion.

Crowley knows heaven will do Aziraphale wrong. Crowley knows it will only be a matter of time until Aziraphale realizes that heaven isn't interested in using his talents to save the world. Crowley knows Aziraphale means well. But Crowley also knows that Aziraphale has to figure it out for himself.

So Crowley says, "Don't bother," and "Good luck," and walks out. But he does what he's always done. He waits because he knows Aziraphale better than all the angels in heaven, far better than the Metatron, and he realizes, even if Aziraphale doesn't yet, that Aziraphale is going to crash and burn in heaven.

Crowley waits and sees and will continue to do so, I think.

The scene with Maggie and Nina suggests this, to me, anyway.

Nina says that if she's lucky, Maggie will still be waiting for her and Maggie assures her that she will.

So, all this is to say that I think when Aziraphale finally works out that the entire heaven and hell structure is fundamentally flawed and cannot be fixed, Crowley will do what he's always done. Crowley will greet him with a: "Took you long enough to work that out, angel," or some such.

Except, this time, Crowley won't be left in doubt as to where Aziraphale stands because Aziraphale will have made his choice at long last, a permanent choice. The choice to turn his back on everything he thought he needed and build something new with Crowley. On their own side.

#good omens #good omens season two #Crowley #Aziraphale #ineffable husbands #A hopeful thought this afternoon because I’m feeling optimistic