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#can you tell Jason is my favorite?
theaceofarrows · 6 months
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Damian: [walks into Bruce's office with his hands behind his back]
Damian: Father, I would like to congratulate you. You are now a grandfather
Bruce: [seconds away from a heart attack] W- what?
Damian: [reveals the hamster he was holding behind his back] Meet Ferdinand
Bruce: [slumps against desk] Next time... please- please lead with that... I'm begging you
-
Jason: [hiding in the vents with a camera] He actually did it, the crazy little son of a bitch
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figofswords · 2 years
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it seems to be pretty common fanon that dick grayson is the most tactile batkid but consider this. it’s actually cass
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voiider · 5 months
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fake psychic Tim but its just. its just psych. Jason dies and batman goes off the deep end so Tim (instead of becoming robin) starts going ham on the 'tips to the police' bc if the police can deal with the smaller crimes then Tim doesn't have to worry about batman killing a petty thief.
Except he's running himself into the ground and he starts getting sloppy bc he's giving the local police info, and bludhaven info (bc dick) AND probably giving Nightwing info when he can and someone catches him or he leaves a paper trail and then Officer Dick Grayson apprehends him and takes him in for questioning and Tim is like "you can't talk to me without my parents or a lawyer present, I'm a minor. And my parents are in Guatemala, so you better call my lawyer."
and Dick is like "kid you're not in trouble i just need to know who's giving you this information." Because there is NO WAY this kid isn't working with someone. Someone who is using a child to drop off information, which while noble to help the police, is putting this child in danger and tim is like, pretty offended actually. That it's being implied that he COULDN'T do this himself.
So he's like "im not working for anyone."
and Dick is like "you have to be getting the info from somewhere. I just wanna help."
and Tim is like AUGH ADULTS "I just- i figured it out on my own" and its CLEAR that Dick doesn't believe him which is, first off, super insulting, never meet your heroes, and second he shouldn't be talking anyway or admit that he goes out at night or Dick will do something stupid like try to make him stop. So he's like (rolling eyes) "I'm psychic. Are you happy? Can I have my phone call now?"
#batman#tim drake#Cue Dick ALMOST not buying it but he's like 'okay kid'#if you're psychic prove it.#And Tim is like oh he thought i was serious??? Uh#“you're favorite animal is a bat.“ And Dick looks at him confused but then sorta pales a little and is like ”... what.”#and tim is like “and you really like nighttime... walks.”#And Dick like turns off the recording and is like “kid what are you saying to me”#and Tim is like “I know you're Nightwing. The ... spirits told me.”#and honestly it's more believable that a 12 year old kid is psychic than that he figured out who Nightwing was on his own#ted talks#anyways lots of fun hijinks can ensue. Tim is technically a security rick and even though dick REALLY doesn't wanna talk to bruce#he should tell him about this... psychic child#Which can just be more questions and Tim answering them and is like#if i wasn't psychic how would i know this.#and Bruce.... doesn't know. So they have no choice but to believe him#psych tim au#also including: bruce being like “.... can you tell my son (jason) i love him?”#tim would actually be pretty good on the field with moments notice observations#he's been trained his whole life to read people at parties and know what they want from him and what they mean#regular people are MUCH easier to read than the elite who say everything backhanded and all have like poised masks of perfection#raye was telling me their psychic tim au and i was like 'ok but what if just psych'#catch us out here both writing separate fake psychic tim aus
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rhiaemrys · 10 months
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Tim Drake, to me personally, is a selective genius. More accurately, he’s just an insanely fast learner when something even mildly interests him (typically something mentioned by Batman and/or Robin). Unfortunately this leads to weird and inconsistent gaps in his knowledge.
Like, for example, and referencing a post about him being unable to work computers I’ve made in the past, Tim learned all about PC hardware because Batman mentioned upgrading the Batcomputers specs once, which was then plastered across forums with the title of like “BATMAN SEEMS TO HAVE THE BUDGET OF NASA, IS THIS WHERE OUR TAX PAYER DOLLARS ARE REALLY GOING?” and Tim wanted to harness the power of the sun to create something similar. This led him down a rabbit hole, and now he can create a super computer from someone’s spare junk drawer. However, when it comes to installing software and actually using the PC beyond its basic functions? Uninteresting. The only reason he learned later on in his Robin career was because Barbra found his lack of ability to hack deeply concerning and decided to remedy it. She provided the proper motivation.
Other weird ass conversations include:
- Was able to deduce the strain of fear toxin that Damian was under, synthesize an antidote, and track Crane down to his warehouse at the Docks district within a three hour time period. (Bruce offhandedly mentioned that they should start writing down the effects of different fear toxins so that they could eventually identify which was which to make antidote administration easier, knowing it’d be an insane and labor intensive task that no one would really do because they were doing just fine currently. Tim promptly created a spreadsheet, copped the cowl footage, and got to work. He learned advanced chemistry for this, promptly bringing his barely passing grade up to an A within two months.)
- Once was able to list the entirety of Haley’s Circus lineup over the years, correctly identifying which performers had been kidnapped by the Court of Owls, yet couldn’t name a single United States president before the year of 2012. (Got embarrassingly into circus performances because y’know, Dick is his hero and so he memorized the entire history of Haley’s Circus so he’d always know who/where/what Dick was talking about when he referenced his time there)
- Word for Word reciting an obscure peace treaty for an ALIEN NATION, but wasn’t able to tell Dick what the Fibonacci sequence was. (Starfire is Tamaranian and Tim assumed that she and Dick would get married one day and he didn’t want to be insensitive so he hacked into the Green Lantern files that all the Earth Lanterns update and got to work researching. Even the stuff that only tangentially mentioned the planet and people)
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echo-stimmingrose · 11 months
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Big Three Cousins at the Beach
Nico: *groans* Why did I agree to this?
Percy: *laying out a beach blanket* Because it will be fun!
Thalia: And technically you didn't agree, Jason and Percy kinda dragged you out of bed.
Nico: You two suck.
Jason: You had been sleeping for like 15 hours!
Hazel: Plus, Will said you needed more sun.
Percy: He's right. You look like a vampire.
Nico: Are we sure we can't drown him?
Percy: No, but you're welcome to try.
Thalia: Race you to the water, Ocean Boy!
Percy: You're on.
Thalia and Percy *running towards the ocean*
Thalia: *Trips Percy* Oops. *Continues running*
Percy: *Spits sand* BITCH
Thalia: Haha!
Percy: *uses the water to dunk her before running to the ocean*
Thalia: *Spews water* ASSHOLE
Thalia and Percy: *wrestling in the ocean*
***
Percy: Guys look! It's a sand shark!
Nico: *pales* *tries to run to the beach and trips, faceplanting in the water*
Thalia: *trying not to laugh* *picks up Nico and takes him to the beach*
Jason: *sitting on the blanket with Hazel* You okay?
Nico: *shuddering* I-I don't like sharks!
Percy: Come on they're like the puppy dogs of the sea!
Nico: No-no!
Thalia: You literally befriend hellhounds.
Nico: That is different!
Thalia: How is that different???
Nico: I-I... You know what? You're a daughter of Zeus who is scared of heights! I don't want to hear it!
Thalia: Bitch! *Kicks sand at him*
Nico: *kicks sand back and misses, hitting Percy*
*sand fight ensues*
Hazel and Jason: *building a sand castle*
***
Percy: *talking to a sea horse*
Jason: This is weird... right????
Nico: I can't say anything, I talk to dead people.
Jason: Yeah okay.....
Percy: *walks back, very sad*
Hazel: Are you okay?
Thalia: What's wrong, Kelp Man?
Percy: A dolphin got caught in a net and drowned itself....
Nico: Is the dolphin economy that bad?
Thalia: *spews soda*
Percy: *horrified fish noises*
Hazel: *scolds* Nico!
Nico: I- *XD*
Hazel: Nico...
Nico: I'm Sorr- No I can't. I'm not even sorry.
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Dick: Hey Jason, can you give me the opposite of these words? Dick: Always, Coming, From, Take, Me, Down. Jason: Never, Going, To, Give, You- Jason: The fucking satisfaction.
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cleromancy · 8 months
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it drives me up the wall when people talking about jayroy are like "preboot roy would never fall for utrh jason" completely ignoring the fact that one of the great loves of roys life is
freakin cheshire,
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anurarana · 8 months
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this is kinda awkward for me bc I'm always like "I wish jason was dead," "have they killed him off yet?" "can he please just get off my screen," but now that it might actually happen, I'm like no wait can we take a chill pill for a sec 😟 I want it to be cool and actually mean something but this whole storyline is just. It's lame guys idk how else to put it. even bruce killing jason could be really interesting if it wasn't just so embarrassing. I am embarrassed to be reading this
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takeustothelakes · 2 years
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my take on pjo’s favorite t swizzle songs! i’m not doing every song that i think because i would go crazy, so i’m doing 4-6!
percy - innocent, i did something bad, cruel summer, my tears ricochet, maroon.
annabeth - long live, you’re not sorry, mr. perfectly fine, this is me trying.
leo - mirrorball, run, tolerate it, clean, soon you’ll get better.
hazel - it’s nice to have a friend, haunted, epiphany, seven, starlight.
frank - willow, wonderland, lavender haze, everything has changed.
piper - bejeweled, so it goes, our song, stay stay stay.
jason - enchanted, gorgeous, message in a bottle, love story, daylight.
reyna - august, come back…be here, fifteen, karma, vigilante shit, speak now.
nico - the story of us, you’re on your own, kid, king of my heart, invisible string, illicit affairs.
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very important announcement: new @birdchildsnest fic!!!
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strangelock221b · 2 years
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It amuses me when fans and even journalists get the Lannister twins mixed up, so I thought I'd go over the differences.
Jason -- shoulder-length hair, pompous ass, Lord of Casterly Rock. He's the one telling young Rhaenyra during her father's hunt that he has enough money to build a dragonpit at Casterly Rock and he's the one at the wedding feast saying women can never go to war since they would never be ready on time.
Tyland -- short hair, quieter, Viserys I's Master of Ships, and Aegon II's Master of Coin. If you see a Lannister twin at a Small Council meeting, it's Tyland, not Jason.
We'll see more of both of them in future seasons but it's Tyland you really want to keep an eye on.
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theaceofarrows · 6 days
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Bruce: Has anyone seen Jason and Damian?
Tim: That went out
Bruce: For what?
Dick: Something about Jason breaking a whetstone- don't ask- and Damian demanding he replace that
Bruce: We already have a whetstone for the batarang
Tim: Yeah, but Damian said and I quote "My katana was forged by greatest bladesmiths the League of Assassins has to offer, that cheap rock will not go anywhere near it"
Bruce: ...That does sound like Damian
Dick: Yep. So now we're just waiting on them
[5 minutes later]
Tim: [looks at his phone and starts laughing]
Tim: You guys are not gonna believe this
Dick: What?
[Shows a trending video of Jason walking across a parking lot with a bag in one hand and a screaming Damian under his arm, before noticing the camera and saying, "don't worry, he's mine I'm not stealing him." *pause* "if I was gonna take one, it definitely wouldn't be this asshole"]
Bruce: [tired sigh] Sadly, I can believe it...
Dick: Well, at least he got the whetstone
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Serious question What do you think Mike's relationship with the other bad family members are like? (DC x FNAF)
Okay I love this question!
First off Bruce
Bruce already wants to adopt him so badly but it only gets worse after every fight with William. like in the Batcave post-battle he goes “Michael…” and then Mikes just gone fully disappeared peaced out (he snuck away while Bruce was brooding)
but if the battle with William's creations was emotionally taxing enough on Michael he goes to Bruce’s office instead of home and waits for him to come up (this happens enough for Bruce to check after every fight with William) and they just talk and/or hug for a while sometimes Mike crys himself to sleep in his arms but most of the time he’s stable enough to go to Tim’s room or home with Henry
Michael has a very Steph Like situation he has a guardian and a roof over his head but still spends most of his time at the manner and relies on Bruce as a father figure he loves Henry obviously but let’s be honest Henry is not stable enough to be a dad to Michael
Now in one version of this au! Tim! (They’re still best friends in the other version obviously)
Their boyfriends. the end. Moving on.
Okay I'm joking
Their boyfriends and They're dating Bernard.
Tim realized he was queer a lot earlier than canon because of Michael. they met when he was Robin in a very similar manner to him and Steph (this is where the sexuality crisis begins) various vigilante shenanigans later Tim realizes he feels the same way about Michael that he does Steph has his crisis and realizations then keeps it inside and buries it deep (not because of internalized homophobia because he has a girlfriend)
And then realizes he also has a massive crush on Bernard his totally Straight Friend who would definitely never feel the same and already has a “crush” on Darla (meanwhile Bernard ❤️👄❤️)
Then BAM! Bruce had Michael enrolled at his school without telling him (this is during the Robin!Steph era which I think lasts longer in this au?) and obviously Michael joins the friend group (fuck canon Bernard doesn’t have a car in this au) and becomes the designated driver he takes them everywhere but the arcade and they don’t actually start dating until post Red Robin (2009) but there was definitely tension
Also Michael definitely convinced Tim to go back to school post Red Robin (probably by going “sigh I wish I could go back to school” “sigh I miss driving you and Bernard around after school” “sigh- And so on)
I’m basically writing fanfiction at this point I think it’s time to stop for now. I’ll come back to this post eventually.
I think. I hope.
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neonphoenix · 2 years
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if you haven't read it yet, Batman: Gotham County Line is a goofy but conceptually interesting 3-issue run where 1. Batman has a jetpack because he's in the suburbs and can't grapple around 2. he's in a cursed eldrich suburb full of zombies 3. one of the zombies is robin!Jason but they actually write him surprisingly complex for, well, the "mandatory zombie Jason appearance" of mid 2000s comics. It veers between silly and horror in what I think is a fun way and Bruce does like, so much character growth in just a few issues? Love that for him. It's firmly "Alright" not good or bad, but I'm obsessed with the themes it plays with, not sure if you'd be interested.
Just read it, it seems to be a typical science vs magic setup, focuses on facts vs faith and whether anything happens to us when we die.
Gonna toss my step-by-step commentary below the cut because it's long. Most of the start is summary of the comic, check the bottom for a summary of my thoughts.
Book 1: The Obvious Kill
First thing we see? Batman making death threats to Joker. I think whether or not he intends to kill him is beside the point, it's all about how the Joker is used to challenge Batman's beliefs and force him to toe the line.
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Joker makes a comment about how being dead would suit Batman because then he'd be able to see everyone he'd lost, Batman declares Joker is, "Crazier than I thought," because he believes in something after death.
What follows is a brief discussion of facts vs faith with Alfred, something which I thought was funny because Bruce declares there are no facts to support an afterlife, despite all the people he's met up to this point who could feasibly support it.
Now that the setup is out of the way, we receive a call from Gordon and go to meet him in his pyjamas. He's got a case file full of incredibly gruesome murders that have been occurring in the suburbs, following the same MO as a recently captured thief.
Batman agrees to look into it, and jetpacks out into the suburbs, after noting the very specific ways in which the murders were carried out. He figures out how the thief and killer were sedating the families, and gives it to the detective on site, Greer. While there, they receive news of another set of murders, and head over to the scene, where the suspect is just leaving. The suspect knocks Batman out by injecting him with something.
When he comes to, we're introduced to the other two detectives on the case: Keith and Radmuller. They aren't very happy with Batman being there, but he is able to conclude that the killer is somewhat aware of his movements, leaving a short list of possibilities.
Batman visits the thief to find out who he's been making sleeping agent for, only for the thief to be shot by a sniper before it can be revealed. He engages the suspect again, and yet again has his ass handed to him.
But now he knows who the killer is! He reveals to the other detectives that it is none other than Radmuller. He jetpacks over to Radmuller's apartment, and enters, only for a rope attached to the door to pull the stool out from under Radmuller, leading to a dramatic hanging.
Radmuller gets carted off to the morgue, and Batman heads home. Unfortunately, that's when the zombie apocalypse begins. Radmuller wakes up and zombifies the paramedics with him.
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Book 2: Death's Highway
Before getting into the second installment, I'd like to take a moment to point out how much of an impact the coloring has on this particular story. As the tone of the story shifts, so does the tone of the panels. Most things are muted, but other things are oversaturated in order to draw attention. It really complements the plot nicely, so I'd recommend anyone interested in reading the full comic to pay attention to it.
Back to the writing.
Bruce wakes up in a cold sweat with nightmares about being torn apart by zombies. He checks his blood to see if he's been inspected with anything, but everything comes back normal. He speaks with Alfred, who, outside of Bruce's field of vision, seems to pull a worm from his head and then absorb it into his hand. Our first clue that something really isn't right. If the zombies weren't enough of one already.
Speaking of zombies, Bruce hears something in the cave and turns around to find a hoard of zombies. He flees to the batmobile while trying to figure out what's wrong with him. He turns back into the cave, and the zombies are only images on the monitor. In the next panel, everything is back to normal. He asks Alfred to run a security check. Everything is fine.
Gordon calls, tells him detective Keith wants to talk. He leaves and phones her. There's something wrong, Radmuller's body has disappeared, and she needs his help. Batman notes that regardless of how much he goes over the facts, they don't make sense. There's something more he's missing. Here we see the return of the fact vs faith argument, as guys facts aren't enough to fill in the blanks.
He meets Keith, she gets killed by the last man Radmuller killed. He's a zombie, and missing both his eyes, as are all of Radmuller's prior victims. There's a motif of sight somewhere in here.
As Keith dies, she begs Batman to tell her there's something more, and he can't. Instead he apologizes and shuts her eyes. Back to the sight motif. Batman has both of his eyes, but he cannot see. He shuts the detective's eyes. The man missing his eyes sees more than both of them.
This is a good time for Deadman to emerge from Keith's mouth. There could be symbolism there but I think it's mostly dramatics.
Outside, Batman pursues the zombie.
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He then calls Alfred, to check in on things back home. He's been getting more and more uncertain throughout the story, and keeps putting up more walls and falling back on what he thinks he knows.
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Everything here is not as it should be. It's almost a little funny, to watch this bit. Alfred doesn't say things are normal, just that they are as they should be. He should be a rotting corpse. Checks out I guess.
Batman runs into Detective Greer, or not accurately, is run into. Like Alfred, Greer is rotting and his left eye has rolled back into his skull. Half blind. They talk a bit, but it doesn't really provide answers. Deadman shows up and declares that they can't provide Batman with answers it's, "Like a snake eating its own tail." He reveals that they're all trapped in some sort of in between state, a fold in time.
Deadman is literally from the land of the dead. That in and of itself should be enough fact to explain that people stick around when they die. Not for Batman though!
They return to Radmuller's apartment, where it all started. There, Batman finds himself. Literally.
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He's so obstinate. The facts are right in front of his face but he doesn't like them and so refuses to believe them. He's incredibly blind. They leave the apartment, only to be confronted by a horde of zombies. Deadman is quickly overcome. Batman, on the other hand, is only about to be, at the hands of Radmuller and his army.
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Finally though, he admits that he's afraid.
Book 3: Night of the Living Dead
Batman is being overcome by zombies. Somehow, he's feeding them. Radmuller comments that it's because violence is all he knows.
Eventually, Radmuller himself steps forward, crooked neck and all. As he begins to beat up Batman, though, his neck seems to straighten. It's a visual symbol of his gaining strength.
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That's 3-0 in Radmuller's favor, for anyone keeping score.
Radmuller reveals that not all of these people are his victims, some are ones Batman failed to save, angry at him for not being there. They attack him, and eventually he is forced to run to find Deadman. I think what he's most terrified of is being alone and without a partner.
That's when help arrives in the form of a partner he failed to save: Robin. Unlike the other dead, Jason isn't mad at Batman for failing. He's just here to help him.
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Robin saves him, and is strong enough to hold back the zombies long enough for Batman to escape to a house, where he discovers Parsons (the thief from before, who was shot) protecting children from their dead parents outside. Parsons is definitely some sort of figure, but I'm not sure what I'd call him. Parsons directs him towards the basement, where he discovers Radmuller's parents, along with a young Radmuller.
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Batman yells at him to shut up, and Radmuller vanishes alongside his parents.
When Batman comes out of the basement, Parsons asks him, "You see?" To which he agrees, saying, "Yeah. I saw." His eyes are beginning to open for the first time. He doesn't get it all yet, but he's starting to.
The zombies break in, and he sends everyone upstairs, telling them he's not alone. Then he calls for Deadman, who appears and asks if he figured it out. It's Batman's reality, both he and Radmuller have control over it. The Phantom Stranger shows up to do something cool and defeat zombies.
I'm at image limit or I'd be adding more, but the Phantom comments on Batman giving power over to "The Hanged Man" which seems to be s reference to the Tarot card.
"The Hanged Man is the card that suggests ultimate surrender, sacrifice, or being suspended in time."
Which honestly seems to be very fitting with this story. Trapped in a fold in time, Batman has to surrender his worldview in order to get out and save everyone.
He goes outside, talks to his parents (as is necessitated by these storylines) and his mother tells him to "Remember more than the pain." He then takes this advice and goes to face Radmuller again, bringing Radmuller's parents along with him.
He defeats Radmuller with ease this time, and the whole thing starts to fall apart. Radmuller's parents confront him about what he did. Jason tells Batman he'll see him around, which Batman agrees with, before leaving, and Deadman instructs him to go back to the start. Batman returns to Radmuller's apartment, this time cutting the rope before he can hang himself. When he drags him outside, it's only been a few minutes since he went in originally.
Radmuller gets hauled away, and Batman reflects on how he's just like any other criminal now. He also implies that he now believes in an afterlife as he jetpacks away.
Themes, motifs, symbols and notes:
Color. I mentioned that the coloring impacted the story a lot, and it really does. Red, blue, & yellow all set very clear tones throughout otherwise muted scenes.
Sight. Blind men and dead men are more capable of sight than men with functioning eyes. That's a common mechanism in stories (see Oedipus) for revealing the truth. In this story, blind and dead men help Batman to open his own eyes. It's also interesting to note the partial vision that shows up in characters such as Alfred.
Robin. Robin saves Batman in this story, like he does throughout DC storylines. The most interesting thing about it is comparing this Jason, who isn't upset with Batman at all, with post-resurrection Jason, who is spitting mad about not being saved.
How much of it is real and how much is fabricated by Batman? His parents say they appear as he remembers them. The people seem to act based on how he thinks they should act. But Jason hardly blames him for his death, even though Batman blames himself for it. So I think the people only appear as he thinks of them, and he doesn't actually have any influence over how they act
Radmuller is the hanged man, and a reference to the Tarot card.
That's all I can think of off the top of my head, but I'm interested in hearing your thoughts as well!
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ursoheavenly · 5 months
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percy is MISSING! going to need everyone at camp half blood on it STAT
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hanicchy · 8 months
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jason, throughout tlh: i don’t know who i am or what awaits me when my memories return, i’m being thrust into a position of independence and power that i’m not confident in but oddly and worryingly comfortable with, and i believe more and more with each battle we face that i’m leading my only two friends in the world to their deaths. i was also incapacitated for 3/4 battles we’ve faced and am having Issues about it
piper, throughout tlh: my relationship with my boyfriend wasn’t even real and i’m doubting my memories of the last few months of my life, my dad is in mortal danger and it’s my fault, i’m going to have to face an enemy of great power very soon and choose between saving the life of my father or my only two friends, i’m becoming more confident in my abilities and combat prowess and in the process becoming more afraid of the things that i can do. i am desperate for some form of comfort but can’t confide in my companions because i’m going to betray them.
leo, throughout tlh: i’m chilling with the homies 😎 we are literally flying through the air 😫 on the dragon that i built 🐉 i am deeply insecure ✌️😔 but i love my friends 💕 and we are hanging out 😤 my mother is dead because of me 😳 i’m sorta a lady magnet 😏 we’re saving the world 🌎 together 🤝🤩
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