#but this is kinda me reclaiming it a bit and i wanna try and normalize it/its pronouns in a positive way bc plenty of people use them

[perenlop]

unprompted pmd oc lore thats sorta based on rescue team dialogue cause im thinking about it: the proper pronoun to use when you don't know a pokemon's specific gender is actually "it/its", not "they/them". In some cases it's considered disrespectful to refer to some legendary pokemon as anything other than "it".

#its lore im on and off on bc i know obviously here its usually an insult and i dont wanna come across as being insulting #but at the same time i wanna have some different ways the pokemon handle gender identity and whatnot and i think this is fun #considering theres a little canon basis from rescue team #also to reflect this im gonna hit more pokemon with the ''it/its'' pronoun beam bc theres much less stigma ofc #i do hope no one takes it as an insult cause like. i get it trust me ive been derogatorily referred to as an ''it'' multiple times #but this is kinda me reclaiming it a bit and i wanna try and normalize it/its pronouns in a positive way bc plenty of people use them #and then get accused of being insulting and whatnot #but i wanna sorta show that gender roles are different over there #and i think while i use real labels here for recognition's sake i do think they have different definitions and terms #idk..... also feel free to add some suggestions too cause this stuff is interesting to me #also to be clear ''they'' is still a common pronoun for nby pokemon #also i think im saying this so people arent jumpscared when atlas and other prequel mons call castor ''it''when they first meet him #its bc they arent aware of his gender identity (and neither is he yet) not bc theyre insulting him lskdfjsdlf

[kageyuji]

asking him to teach you how to kiss

⤷ bokuto, oikawa, atsumu, suna, kageyama ; gn!reader

warnings/genre: fluff, friends to lovers if you squint, some swearing but it’s mostly in oikawa’s

note: reblogs help me tons, so please reblog <3

━━ BOKUTO ;

*incoherent noises*

he’s so confused and flustered but he’s so sweet at the same time

wants to be helpful but also wtf do you even know that he’s actually in love with you

he agrees nonetheless

such a giddy mess whenever he realizes that he is the person you wanted to kiss

“Hey, Kou? Do you think you could teach me how to kiss someone?”

It was as though your words froze him; his eyes widened and he held his breath. Then he blinked a few times and turned to look at you.

“You- what?”

“...teach me how to kiss. If you want to, I mean. There’s just... there is this guy, and I don’t know how to kiss, and if I ever wanna, y’know, I want to know how to do it well.”

Bokuto takes a deep breath, and you can feel the atmosphere drop. He guess he knew that you would have feelings for someone eventually, he just figured he would catch on before you thought about kissing someone.

“Well... I mean, normally I wouldn’t mind, but if you’re... if you have feelings for someone else, maybe we shouldn’t?”

“And if that someone else is you?”

There a long pause, for a moment you began to think maybe you’d been reading a lot of signals wrong. But then a smile spread across his face, pink painting his cheeks.

“Maybe I could teach you then.”

━━ OIKAWA ;

i hate this mf i stg /j

anyways

he acts all cocky, but in reality he’s freaking out

to him, he’s being very good at hiding that, but you can see his flustered smile and the blush dusting his face

kinda sad that this is temporary but he’ll take what he can get

until you say you wanted to kiss him, in which case he’s openly flustered

“Uh, hey ‘ru? Do you think you could teach me how to kiss?”

A smile bulls at the corner of his lips, his face turning pink. It takes him a few minutes to respond, partially because he doesn’t know if he heard you right and partially because his brain could only form ‘holyshitfuckshitohmygod’

“Uhm- yeah, yeah. Do you... like, is there a particular reason?” He bit down the jealousy — or was it insecurity? he couldn’t tell — for a moment to reclaim his cocky demeanor. “Aw, or does Y/n jus wanna kiss me?”

“Yes.”

“What-”

You don’t reply, just send him a smile. The opening and closing of his mouth in an attempt to say something is actually quite entertaining. He blinks a few times, eyebrows furrowed.

He was kidding, of course he was. Though, he didn’t to be. It was more of a joke to make himself feel a little better, but he hoped that you’d been serious.

“I- I mean, of course you would want to kiss me. Go ahead, angel, I’ll be happy to teach you.”

━━ ATSUMU ;

what he says: i got this

what he means: i don’t got this

he’s going to act all suave and smooth but the truth is he is freaking tf out

he kinda concerned because ?? why are you kissing someone ??

but he figures he also gets to kiss you so he wins at least a little bit

“You know how to kiss someone, right? Could you teach me?”

He coughed, sputtering on his drink and then screwing the cap back on. He cleared his throat, blinking a few times and then staring at you.

“Come again? You- teach you how to kiss?”

A playful smile pulled at your lips and you nodded. You didn’t seem be embarrassed by it in the slightest. The two of you had been friends for years so maybe you did see it as perfectly innocent... right?

“Well.. yeah. Only if you want to, I mean.”

He swallowed thickly, taking a moment to let this run through his mind again. This didn’t feel real, this had to be a dream, right?

“I mean, yeah, that’s fine. But why the hell would you want to know how to kiss someone? You don’t have a partner.”

You smiled again. It seemed almost mockingly to him, you had no idea how one request could make him feel so many emotions all at the same time. Or did you?

“I would want to know how to kiss you.”

“Oh.”

Oh.

━━ SUNA ;

probably the calmest one right beside kags

i mean he’s freaking tf out but he manages to act like he’s calm at least

just smiles and teases you a little, kinda hurts him a little that you aren’t going to kiss him

fun fact: when you tell him you just wanted to kiss him, you’re pretty sure that’s the first time you’ve seen him blush

“Do you think you could teach me how to kiss?”

He doesn’t say anything at first, just moves his eyes to look at you. You can see the gears turning in his head before he takes a deep breath.

“Yeah.”

Honestly he surprised himself with the level of calmness in his voice. In reality, his heart was beating out of his chest, for two reasons actually. The idea of kissing you was one, and the idea that you wanted to kiss someone other than him was the second.

He moved to sit up in the chair he was sitting in. “But f you’ve got some person that you’re wanting to practice for, maybe that wouldn’t be very moral.”

“But what if you were the person I wanted to kiss, hm?” You sent him a playful smile.

He looked over to you again, this time smiling. He was blushing now, though trying to laugh and act as though he wasn’t that affected by your words. Despite that, it was obvious that he was.

“Then you could just ask, baby. C’mon on try, I’ll be more than happy to teach you. Just know that I like it be thorough.”

━━ KAGEYAMA ;

he is barely reacting to you but it’s literally only because he doesn’t know wtf to do

honestly he wants to, but the fact that you said ‘teach’ means that there is someone else you would rather kiss

so he hesitates to agree — not because he doesn’t want to kiss you, but because he’s worried he’ll have only a taste of you before someone takes you from him

and that would hurt him more than he would like to admit

“Tobio, we’re friends, right?”

“Uh... yeah, I guess. Why?” He had never hated a word more than he hated ‘friend’.

“So do you think you could teach me how to kiss someone? There’s this really sweet guy, but I don’t... I don’t really know how to kiss someone.”

Kageyama’s breath caught in his throat. There were about a thousand different emotions and thoughts running through him mind right now, none of which he knew how to put into words.

“I’m your friend, and yet you haven’t even told me about this guy, huh?” He teased, though the words hurt him.

It took you a moment to respond. Before, this had seemed like a good idea, but now you were worried. You supposed you could play it off as a joke though.

“Because wouldn’t it be kind of weird to talk to you about you?”

He made an indignant noise, blinking at you, heat rising on his face. He stuttered out a bunch of other noises you couldn’t quite make out before he regained his composure.

“Y- What? There’s, uhm. Well... I guess if you wanted to kiss me that sounds nice.”

#hqhangoutnet #bokuto x reader #oikawa x reader #atsumu x reader #suna x reader #kageyama x reader #bokuto headcanons #oikawa headcanons #atsumu headcanons #suna headcanons #kageyama headcanons #bokuto x you #bokuto x y/n #oikawa x you #oikawa x y/n #atsumu x you #atsumu x y/n #suna x you #suna x y/n #kageyama x you #kageyama x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu comfort #bokuto koutarou x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #atsumu miya x reader #suna rintarou x reader #kageyama tobio x reader

[itsthemoofacewriting]

Zoro doesn’t flirt

I wrote my first ZoNami story just over a year ago and I wanted to post something around that time again (okay, so I’m actually late. This was originally planned for the 25th) to celebrate the milestone!

Sanji being jealous is a guilty pleasure of mine but I also like him being a total bro and matchmaker. Like yeah, he’ll nudge Zoro in the right direction, but he’ll also make fun of him whilst he does it. Takes his shots where he can get ‘em.

Summary: Roronoa Zoro, the fearsome pirate hunter, bounty of 320,000,000, does not flirt.

Except he totally does, and it takes a guy talk with Sanji of all people for him to admit it. Kinda. Rating: T

This can also be found on AO3 and FFN. 

Enjoy.

“It’s adorable, you know,” Sanji trailed off, interrupting the silence in the kitchen. He didn’t turn to look at Zoro, who he knew was at the table behind him, he just carried on drying the dish in his hands. But he knew it would be enough to engage the other man.

There was a brief silence and Sanji wondered for a moment if he was wrong, but then Zoro was grunting at him.

“What was that?” Sanji threw over his shoulder, still not turning. He’d heard Zoro just fine, knew that grunt was for him to elaborate, but he knew it’d get under his skin. He can almost see the scowl that would inevitably be on his face without having to turn around.

“What’s adorable?” Zoro bit out and his tone’s suggesting he knows that whatever Sanji’s about to say is going to piss him off.

Sanji turned then, deciding that he wanted to see Zoro’s face for what he was about to say. His previous thought was right, there’s apprehension but also irritation rolling off of Zoro from the kitchen table where he’s sat.

“Your attempts at flirting with Nami-san.” Sanji’s lips curling into an infuriating smirk.

Zoro’s face went blank and Sanji’s almost disappointed at the lack of expression, felt like he’d been cheated out of his prize for a second before Zoro’s lips are curling downwards to match the deep scowl forming on his face

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Zoro said it with such conviction that to the untrained they would believe him, but Sanji did know him.

He could see right through it.

“Oh so your little scene at the table this morning during breakfast wasn’t flirting?”

Zoro looked incredulous. “It was an argument! What kind of idiot are you?”

“Normal people don’t enjoy ‘arguments’-” Sanji made air quotes then and Zoro’s grinding his teeth at being mocked- “or seek them out with the person that is apparently ‘the devil itself’,” Sanji finished.

“I do not enjoy them!” Apparently all Zoro has in his arsenal is denials and it’s all the confirmation Sanji needed. Sanji just wondered how long he’d be able to keep this up before it ended it an all-out brawl.

You can only corner a wild animal for so long…

“Only because you lose all the time, but you love the attention. Everyone can see it.”

Teeth clenched? Check. Knuckles white and gripping his sake? Check. Tense? Check. Silent? Check.

He’d achieved that sooner than expected.

Time to deliver the final blow.

Sanji dramatically sighed and turned to the side, to face away from Zoro. He looked at him from the corner of his eyes as he said:

“Roronoa Zoro, esteemed pirate hunter, whose name brings fear to those that hear it,” he has to resist gagging as he said it, no doubt adding to Zoro’s already inflated ego. It’s all worth it though with his next words, “can’t flirt like a grown man. It’s kind of pathetic really.”

The response is immediate, Zoro’s chair falling back with a clang on the hardwood floor as he shot to his feet, his hands reaching to rest on the hilt of his swords.

“You wanna go, is that it?”

“Running from the conversation like a coward? Poor Nami-san, having to deal with a brute like you,” Sanji goaded, even though he was already pushing away from the counter to take a step towards Zoro. “A brute with no flirting skills or ways to woo a woman.”

“I don’t flirt!”

Before anything could escalate further, the kitchen door’s swinging open and the very person they’re talking about entered. Zoro’s throwing him a foul look which screamed ‘keep your trap shut’. Sanji ignored it as his eyes zeroed in on Nami.

“Nami-san!” Sanji greeted cheerfully as she walked towards him, paying no mind to Zoro at the table or the fight about to break out. From the table, Zoro’s watching her like a hawk.

“Sanji-kun,” Nami greeting back, but left it at that as she stood in front of the fridge, fingers gracefully sliding around the combination lock with practiced ease to reach in and retrieve a drink.

“Nami, grab me one too,” Zoro called over to her just as she was about to close the fridge. Sanji frowned at his lack of manners but Nami beat him to it.

“What’s the magic word?” She teased; the fridge door still cracked open. Only Sanji, Nami and Robin knew the combination and between Sanji and Nami, Zoro had a higher chance of getting a drink relatively easily with her… and he could flirt with her, of course.  

He snorted before firing back, “I’ll remember that when you start barking orders.”

And just like that, it was like Sanji wasn’t even in the room anymore. They were both swept up in their bickering (flirting) that he was now openly watching the scene before him and neither took notice. He wasn’t even subtle about it; he’d put his pan down, his arms crossed and leaned back on the counter to watch the show.

It was an interesting watch.

You could tell a lot more with these two with what was said physically than verbally. And right now it’s screaming in the quiet kitchen. The way Nami’s leaning over Zoro where he’s sat, berating him as he moved the beer just out of her reach, despite her being nice enough to bring it over.

“How old are you?” Nami complained as her fingertips brushed the bottle, then Zoro’s moving it out of reach again.

“Sounds like loser talk right there,” he laughed and it sounded cold and cruel, at least to Sanji’s ears anyway, but his expression held a softness that is normally reserved for her (and Chopper, but that’s a given at this point).

To anyone else that wasn’t on this ship, it’d look like they were genuinely arguing. Both frowning now that Nami’s reclaimed her drink and voices gradually growing louder in their verbal ping pong match, but behind that, you could see Zoro’s eye lighting up as he leaned in as they went back and forth. He was enjoying this and Sanji was instantly reminded of that little boy that wouldn’t leave the girl alone, despite saying he didn’t like her. Except that girl enjoyed it too and gave as good as she got.

And then Zoro brought Sanji’s metaphor to life and actually tugged on Nami’s braid. He wasn’t even keeping up with their conversation anymore, it moved so quickly sometimes, so he’s not sure why Zoro did it. But it brought a blush to Nami’s face that has Zoro smirking in triumph before they’re launching into a new argument, one he does take interest in because she’s giving him shit about his hair and he wanted some of that material for later.

It seemed after all of that, Nami had come out the victor on their verbal spar but Zoro wasn’t one to go down easily. He got up and crowded into her space, something that wasn’t hard as they’d already been leaning into each other, and the atmosphere thickened as the space between their faces started to disappear and even Sanji held his breath- even though he wasn’t directly involved. It looked like he was going to kiss her, the way he was staring her down, his gaze flicking around her face, and despite inwardly thinking about how lame that would be (where’s the candlelight dinner?), he would still begrudgingly admire it because he honestly had no idea where Zoro suddenly got the balls from after all his pussyfooting.

That thought quickly came shattering down, along with the atmosphere, when he instead swiped the drink from her hands and took a long swig, his own drink abandoned next to him on the table. Sanji wanted to groan because honestly, what an idiot, but he stayed silent just so he could see how this played out.

It played out pretty much how Sanji expected.

Nami looked stunned and then in the next moment outraged, probably not at him drinking her drink (he’d seen them share many times before- something he might bring up, actually, when this had finished), but at being one upped. Sanji had seen her face just moments ago, she’d expected something far different from that, and no doubt the embarrassment was washing over her now.

She spluttered a few times, mouth trying to form words until she gave up. When no words appeared, she huffed instead, flicked her braid over her shoulder and turned on her heel to storm out of the kitchen.

Zoro grinned viciously as he watched her leave, his gaze straying much further south than it probably should.

It’s silent in the kitchen after the door closed, Zoro’s gone back to drinking his own drink and ignoring Sanji like their previous conversation hadn’t happened.

As if Zoro’s getting off the hook that easily.

“So… you don’t flirt, huh?”

Zoro doesn’t grace him with a response, at this point what can he say? Can hardly keep denying it after that show, so he settled for glaring at him fiercely instead. Something that didn’t affect Sanji in the slightest. He’d survived his biological brothers growing up, this is nothing.

“It’s…. giving as good as I get.” Zoro finally settled for, but even he doesn’t look convinced at that one.  

Sanji gave him a bland look. “So flirting?”

Zoro’s face is pinched painfully and it’s because he’s boxed into a corner. There’s no way to escape the inevitable and with a tight jaw he’s admitting, “Fine. I’m ‘flirting’.” He added the air quotations sarcastically, half giving in but still being stubborn and Sanji begrudgingly accepted that. Anymore pushing and it really will end in a fight.

“So, now that we’ve established you are flirting- don’t give me that look shithead, you are, and you know it-” Sanji pointed his finger as him but Zoro didn’t give anything other than a sour expression so he continued- “what’re you going to do about it?”

There’s a long pause and it’s because Zoro’s currently warring between continuing the stubborn streak and giving in.

For once, he picked the right direction, because they both knew Sanji would keep going until he gave anyway.

“I can’t believe I’m talking to you about this,” Zoro muttered and sighed, running his hand through his hair trying to stall. “I have a plan; I’m doing things at my own pace.”

“Any chance this plan happens before we find One Piece?”

“I don’t want to rush anything.”

“Strange, you’re not normally such a coward. If anything, you rush in like a moron.”

“You can stand there and pretend all you like but you’re no different, pervert.”

Sanji rolled his eyes in response. But then, a thought came to mind, something that Zoro had said just before was bothering him and it sounded far too vague. “Hang on, just to be thorough, what exactly is your plan?”

Zoro shrugged as he responded, “Wait for the right moment.”

What an idiot. Truly. Nami must have done something in her past life to be stuck with him. He’d pray for her.

“That’s not a plan!”

“I don’t plan anything normally and it turns out alright,” Zoro said simply.

“You can’t just fight and stumble your way through this, you idiot!”

Zoro turned to him then, placing his empty drink to the side. “Alright then self-proclaimed ladies’ man, what plan do you have? Huh?”

Sanji opened his mouth to respond but Zoro interrupted-

“I swear, if you say candlelight dinner.”

Sanji’s shoulders sagged and Zoro’s laughing nastily.

“Oh, not so easy is it? And you call yourself a lady’s man, really is all hot wind in the end, huh?”

As much as Sanji knew how to get under Zoro’s skin, it unfortunately worked the other way around and Zoro’s comment has Sanji biting down his temper, his leg begging him to stop holding back. So instead, he chose to ignore that, be the bigger man. And maybe soothed himself with the thought of hiding one of Zoro’s weights later.

Sanji pushed away from the counter to distract himself, walking through the kitchen to open the fridge. He could hear Zoro playing with his drink behind his back, even though it’s empty and then Sanji’s grabbing another drink before walking over to the table. He placed it down in front of Zoro but doesn’t let go as he reached for it.

Zoro raised an eyebrow at the gesture.

“I don’t know what you’re really worried about and don’t deny that you’re not, but Nami’s interested.” Then he’s releasing the drink for Zoro to take.

Zoro’s gave him a sharp look. “She say something?”

Sanji took a step back to lean on the counter in the dining room. “She doesn’t have to. When you have people skills, you can see these sorts of things. Maybe add it to your to do list, along with playing with your swords.”

Zoro snorted then and for the first time since he entered the kitchen, it’s not in anger, or annoyance but in amusement and Sanji’s chuckling as well. Maybe not at his own words but at this situation. He never would have put money on his evening ending up like this.

They’re back in silence again but that’s fine, because Sanji’s pretty sure he’s got his point across. Zoro had half-heartedly admitted he was flirting and that he was going to do something about it. Good enough.

But then Zoro surprised him by speaking, offering up information that wasn’t asked for.

“I don’t want to ruin what we have.”

Sanji’s almost speechless and his face is flabbergasted by Zoro’s quiet words. Something that he quickly got under control because if Zoro saw it, he would get cagey instantly and that would be the end. He’d never be able to touch on this again.

For a second, he hesitated, unsure what to say. He didn’t think Zoro was capable of doubting himself. He was normally such a smug bastard. This didn’t sit right with Sanji and its then that he found the words.

“I didn’t realise Perona was around, maybe it was those two years you spent with her. You sound like you already lost. How depressing.” It’s tough love but he’s sure that’s what’s needed. Then again, he wasn’t sure it was possible for him to give Zoro anything else.

Zoro said nothing and that doesn’t seem like a good thing either. He dug deep for the next one, “You can’t move forward if you don’t move at all.”

“You get that from a fortune cookie?”

Snark is better than silence, even if it does piss him off. “Seemed to work, what does that say about you?”

They’re glaring at each other now and they’re just about to tip over the edge when a weird look crossed Zoro’s face.

“Wait, why are you sticking your nose in anyway? You’re nosey at the best of times but this is a step too far for you.”

Oh shit. Time’s up. Play it cool.

“Like you said, I’m being nosey.”

Zoro’s eyes narrowed. “Bullshit-” and cruel smirk crossed Zoro’s face as he leaned back- “you’re pushing too hard and don’t think I don’t see your twitching leg. You’re holding yourself back.”

“I care about Nami-san and, unfortunately, you’re a part of that now.” Good save, Sanji, go with that. He mentally clapped himself on the back.

“Kinda sounds like you care about me too.”

“Don’t push your luck.” Sanji pointed a finger at him threateningly but it did nothing other than add to the infuriating expression on Zoro’s face. It’s superiority and it grinds Sanji.

“What other explanation would you like to give it? Why not just talk to Nami if it’s for her.”

God damn it. What a prick. He refused to say anything and that’s all Zoro really needed to hear as he chuckled and finished the last of his second drink.

“It’s painful to watch you two dance around each other,” is all Sanji supplied. It basically confirmed what Zoro said but he’s not saying anything other than that. He refused.

“That bad?” Zoro grimaced.

Sanji smirked. “There’s currently a betting pool.”

Zoro groaned loudly, head tipped back. “Fucking course there is. Meddling idiots, the lot of you.”

“She won’t say no. Well, as long as you ask like an adult and not pull on her hair like a child.” Sanji shook his head. “You literally did it earlier too, where did you pick this up from?”

“Got her attention, didn’t it?” Zoro looked far more satisfied than he deserved to look.

“I don’t want to badmouth Nami-san, but she normally has such exquisite taste, so I really wonder what happened here.” Sanji’s hand wafting in Zoro’s direction.

“Seriously though, stop hanging around. I know you’re worried about your friendship but give Nami some more credit-” Sanji paused, mulling over whether to say anything further, was this going too far? Ah, screw it, he got this far- “She won’t say no.”

Zoro gave him an assessing look, like he was trying to see if the other man was messing with him before he nodded, “Got it.” He stood from his seat then, apparently done with the conversation once and for all.  

Sanji stopped him before he could turn to leave, “Let’s agree to never do this again.”

“Agreed.”

And just because Sanji’s an absolute shit that cannot resist, “Unless, of course, you need advice about sex because you look hopeless in that department.”

“You piece of shit!”

And his time was truly up then, something that Sanji welcomed because he was actually starting to feel friendlytowards the moss head.

“What do we have here? Bro bonding and I wasn’t invited?!”

Both Zoro and Sanji whipped their heads towards the new voice, stopping dead in their tracks and gaped. Because there stood Franky in the doorway of the kitchen, one hand on his hip and the other lifting his glasses, like he couldn’t believe the sight in front of him.

How either of them missed him they weren’t sure, nor did they know just how long he’d been standing there… or what he’d heard.

“We are not bonding!”

“What’s wrong with you.”

--------------------------

Sorry to ZoSan shippers, no hate whatsoever, but in my eyes, they have such brotherly sibling energy. I’d wanted to write this for a while.  

As always, forgive any errors.

Happy new year everyone!

#ZoNami #ZoNa #zoroxnami #swordgust #opwriting #opfanfic #one piece #zoro #nami #sanji

[rvb-is-gay]

ok so now that the final episode of rvb0 is out for everyone, lets get into some discussion about it! please note that post isnt a topic of debate but rather just my personal thoughts about everything, so dont go arguing in the replies

(fair warning ahead of time for any fans, this is mostly criticism and negative feelings about it, so keep scrolling if you dont wanna read it)

When RVB0 was first announced, I remember everyone was first upset that the Reds and Blues weren't in it, including me. But now that I've watched the whole thing, I can say with confidence that my only issue with RVB0 isn't the lack of the Reds and Blues, but rather everything. the dialogue, some of the animation, the characters, the delivery, the pacing, the ridiculous amount of clichés, etc. I don't dislike RVB0 just because there's no Reds and Blues. I dislike it because I just found the entirety of it bad.

When I first started watching it, I went in with an open mind that maybe this season could actually be really good. I’d also be lying if I said that there wasn't a single scene that I liked. There were actually a few, but they still didn't make up for just the overall badness of the season. But please note that I don't blame the voice actors for any of this or even just Torrian Crawford for the season coming out a giant mess. Many people worked for this season and always had the opportunity to improve or change things but didn't. But anyways, let’s get into some of the criticisms I have for this season.

1. Smaller and more opinion oriented criticisms

This isn’t really criticism or anything important, but rather just a few things I found a bit weird to me personally.

First, the term “ragtag team of misfits” was used to describe Shatter Squad (and was even actually said out loud by One in the last episode, which sounded just so cliché and dumb in my opinion). I don't think this describes them at all?? Everyone has, at the very least, decent relationships with each other (save for One and East who were competitive with each other (which I also fucking hate in RVB that all the girl characters are always competitive with each other)), but that still doesn't really fit the term ragtag) and they all fight very well. I think ragtag fits the Reds and Blues more than it does Shatter Squad; they're bad at fighting, they argue and fight all the time, they're idiots, and that's why we love them. If they had just stuck with “a team of misfits”, that would've made more sense, but again, this is more of a personal opinion than genuine criticism.

Second, I don’t really like the aesthetics this season had. Everything felt a bit too neon and bright and then some stuff just felt like it came straight out of World of Warcraft or something. It didn’t really feel like RVB.

Third, my feelings about Carolina constantly calling Wash David can be summed up by what Michael said in the first episode of Halo 4 LASO: “Now we’re just gonna throw his name around all willy nilly. It used to be a secret.” When someone is called by their real name in RVB or just any story in general where everyone goes by code names, it’s usually a big deal and indicates something serious. Carolina wore out Wash’s name the first time she said it and it just got more and more irritating from then on out and lost its value.

Fourth, who was the blue and purple soldier in the first teaser we got? Was that One? Did they decide to change her armour colour? I don’t know, I just randomly remembered that and thought it was weird but I guess it must’ve just been a colour change.

Now, onto the more serious criticism.

2. Animation and dialogue

The second thing I wanna talk about is the animation. Don't get me wrong, the fighting animation is probably the best compared to everything else and it was pretty good to watch, but the talking and idle animations and gestures were..... kinda yikes. I know that it could be chalked up to “well we’re not used to seeing animated gestures since all of RVB usually has everyone just holding their gun and using the regular Halo models” but there were still some pretty bad parts.

Take the scene from Encounter at 3:26 as an example (I uploaded the scene to YT to put here, but obviously it was blocked for copyright):

This scene is probably one of the worst when it comes to not only the animations, but the dialogue, pacing, and delivery. When I first saw this, I honestly laughed. Here's a list of my problems with this scene and what made it so laughable:

The overexaggerated hand gestures. I get that because everyone's in armour and a helmet, it can be hard to show expression, but this feels like a bit much. Especially when One says “what? You’re pulling us off the mission? You cant do that!” I think that one scene in season 15 when Grif stays behind on Iris while everyone leaves and it slowly zooms in on Simmons’ visor somehow does a lot better at expressing feelings than this.

East immediately making the connection between Axel and Zero feels weird. I don't know if its just me who feels this way, but I think it should've been a little bit longer before she immediately is just like “you know Zero don't you”

Axel saying “I... I do... I did”  also sounds weird and like he was trying a bit too hard to sound dramatic. I don't really know how to describe it its just such a weird delivery of the line.

The way they all immediately start yelling at each other.

One saying “Axe, I trusted you” right after saying “tell us the truth”. Girl, you gave him no opportunity to explain and just immediately jumped to not trusting him anymore. Speaking of which, I don't think this was ever really mentioned again and had no meaning or importance to it.

The echoing of “I trusted you” also feels cliché to me, but this is more of a minor thing.

I think this one comment on one of the episodes on the RT site that says the dialogue “seemed acted rather than natural. It didn't really sound like how people normally talk, more how actors talk in plays” is how I feel about all of the dialogue in RVB0.

3. The villains

Zero and Diesel both felt like they didn't really have any motivation at all for being villains. Phase is probably the best when it comes to this. She was essentially abused by her father as a child and forced to undergo being experimented on. This is an actual good and understandable motivation.

Diesel we know basically nothing about, and then on the other hand, all Zero wants is power. But for what? Why? I can understand that power is a pretty common thing for people to want, but it still kind of felt like there wasn't really anything there.

Some previous good villains in RVB include:

Temple: Temple witnessed his best friend be brutally murdered right in front of him by 2 soldiers who didn't give a shit and just left him to die, especially right after he told him he was having a baby. Of course it’s understandable that he has a hatred of Freelancers after this. Any normal person would.

Felix: Felix was probably the best villain of all of RVB, to be honest (right beside the Director). He was just somehow so likeable and had so much personality, despite being an asshole. His ultimate motivation was money and being rich, which is another thing I can understand; the more money you have, the more you can essentially do whatever you want and live in luxury. I mean, even so many people in real life do horrible things just for money. I don't even have to give examples for this. Felix in general is also just a psychopath.

The Director: The whole reason the Director did what he did was because he lost the person he loved most in the world: his wife. He was willing to do literally anything to bring her back, leading to all of his actions in the Project Freelancer saga. You can find many examples of movie/TV/book/etc characters/villains seeking vengeance as a result of loss of a loved one and grief. Despite being a horrible person, the Director actually managed to be a villain you could even sympathize with, making him even better.

Sharkface: Although a bit of a more minor villain, similar to Temple, Sharkface is a villain because he wants revenge on the people that killed his team, the people he considered to be the only family he’s ever had.

4. Tucker & the swords

The fourth thing I wanna talk about is the whole thing with Tucker and the swords. I always found it kinda weird how both Tuckers sword and now Locus’ sword in the chorus trilogy were the same, but then in RVB0, Zero’s sword looks and acts completely different, but that might just be a little nitpick of mine.

As for Tucker, it was so good to see him. Although I don’t know if it was just me, but he seemed a little OOC. What I didn't like about seeing Tucker again was that he did literally nothing the entire episode. He was useless. He said “I can fight” at one point but then all he does during the battle is get held at knife point, run away, and then get stabbed and have his sword taken. Tucker isn't an amazing fighter, but he’s definitely a lot more capable than just this. We’ve seen him in action many times and I just feel like he could've done a bit more. It almost feels like he was purposefully nerfed and tossed aside just to advance the plot.

Another thing that I and probably a lot of people are upset about is the fact that Tucker might not even own his sword anymore?? When East stabbed him, he apparently died and the sword was rebound to Phase, but it wasn't very clear that this was the case. Although the beginning of the next episode starts with hospital beeps and a flatline, I don't think it was still really clear enough that Tucker actually died long enough for Phase to reclaim the sword because I saw a handful of people confused in the comments and, like me, even thought it was just bad writing at first and that the writers completely forgot about the rules of the sword established over several prior seasons.

When in the hospital, Wash tells Tucker that he almost died. Although I actually liked this scene because it was nice to see wash and tucker bantering again, I think it could've been made better and made the plot clearer if instead of saying he almost died, Wash said something along the lines of “Tucker, you died. Your heart stopped, but they were able to bring you back thanks to their advanced medical tech” and then in response Tucker freaks out because that means his sword will now work for Phase and now they know how urgent the situation is.

I really really hate that Phase just has Tucker’s sword now and nothing is even said about it. If Tucker was to give his sword away to someone, I think many people would prefer that it was at least someone close to him, like Junior for example, but instead it goes to a random girl he hardly knows.

5. Pacing

The fifth thing I wanna talk about is the pacing. This season was definitely a lot shorter than normal and I think that’s one of the things that really prevented it from being good. The entire story just feels rushed and while I understand that it can be really difficult to build a good story and characters in such a short time, I think there’s still ways you can do it without it feeling like there’s so much missing. I think the long intros and outros are also responsible for less time and maybe they should’ve considered cutting them to give more actual episode time. Here’s a few things that were poorly done as a result of bad pacing:

The final battle against Zero: The whole battle just somehow felt like a typical video game boss battle that ends super quickly to me. Shatter Squad didn’t even defeat Zero, he just up and got disintegrated or whatever from Black Lotus.

Shatter Squad giving up on their mission: After receiving the silly deep voice filtered message from Zero, everyone on Shatter Squad just immediately gives up on finding him.

One’s speech: One’s speech wasn’t awful or anything and I didn’t really have any problems with the speech itself, but rather just how quickly the team went from “we can’t do it.. it’s over..” to “you’re right! I’m in! Let’s go get them!” Compare this to Doc and Sarge’s speech to the Reds and Blues after Church and Carolina leave in season 10 episode 20. It just felt a lot more genuine (this is probably because the Reds and Blues had a lot more time to be developed, though) and was only given after some time passed rather than 2 seconds later. The scene and context also transitioned well into it and at first, nobody was on board with what Doc was saying, which is more realistic in my opinion. People’s minds won’t just instantly change, they’re still gonna think about it and maybe have a few doubts at first.

Phase and West: During their fight, West talked a lot about how he regrets giving Phase away to Starlight, that he won’t hurt her, and is even willing to die for her. Their scene together ends with Phase punching him in the head and then leaving to join the others and nothing else about them is mentioned. We don’t know if Phase forgave him or not, we don’t know how West feels, etc.

Tucker’s sword: Phase still has Tucker’s sword and like the scenario with West, nothing about it is mentioned. We don’t know what she’s going to do with it, if she’s going to keep it, if Tucker’s gonna do anything about it, etc.

6. Clichés

Clichés aren’t inherently bad and can be really impactful and good if done right. But when it comes to RVB0, it’s jampacked with clichés that aren’t good. Here are a few examples:

Everyone gives up until a speech is given: All of the points for this are the same as above, but I wanted to include this scene as a cliché as well.

Every female character is competitive with each other: RVB falls into this a lot, like I mentioned earlier. It happens again with East and One, although luckily they seem to resolve it, but not until literally the end of the season.

West’s fit about East: All of the lines and delivery in this scene were just atrocious and cheesy. I think West’s dialogue just could’ve been a bit more original, but instead we’re given this boring predictable “I won’t lay a hand on her. I promised her. I promised her mother. I promised she’d be safe” spiel that has no emotion to it in his voice.

The whole “I got this, you go ahead” thing: This isn’t like a super cliché thing, but I found it pretty interesting how it happens twice in the same episode.

I think this is pretty much all I can think of at the moment. If I think of anything else, I’ll add onto this. Overall, I think RVB0 would’ve done a lot better as just an RVB spinoff so that it could have more episodes and seasons dedicated to developing characters and a good plot. I’m really disappointed with this season and I hope whatever comes next is better than what RVB0 was. I hope the team that worked on it can learn a few things that come from the good and valid constructive criticism given to them. And if I had to pick, I think I’d say Raymond was my favourite out of all the new characters. He just felt the most relatable and realistic to me.

#rvb crit #rvb0 critical #rvbz critical #post #mod sol

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

Out of My League (Midoriya Izuku X Reader X Bakugou Katsuki) PART 5

PART 5 to:  https://ice-cream-kitsunegirl.tumblr.com/post/189980977299/out-of-my-league-midoriya-izuku-x-reader-x

Taglist: @dailyojiromashirao​, @asja-the-hoarder​, @breezy-chan11414​, @captainw0lfy, @sunflowergem​, @lenkiryuu

Clarifications:

(F/C): Favorite Color (H/C): Hair Color (E/C): Eye Color

Summary: You prepare yourself for the dance, and Izuku is nervous as hell...

She comes to speak to me I freeze immediately 'Cause what she says sounds so unreal...

‘She’s So High’- Tal Bachman

THE OTHER DAY…

‘Hey. I know I acted like a gloomy doofus yesterday, but I still do wanna go to the dance with you. So… we’ll meet here? At the front of the school building?’

Izuku gasped sharply and loudly, hand coming to his mouth to cover any scream that wanted to leave him, and he called himself an idiot before texting back ‘Yes! Yes! We’ll meet here! Can’t wait!’ That came off a bit more excited than he hoped but he couldn’t help it, you still wanted to go to the dance?! He was so happy! Oh my God he was still going to the dance with you, he almost forgot about that…

Oh my God he almost forgot about that and now he had to learn how to dance! And fast!!

And unbeknownst to him, you were thinking the exact same thing as you stood in your room and put on several Youtube videos to learn all these cool dances. You were clumsy doing it but you kept at it so you could actually try to do something like dancing for tomorrow night…

Afterwards you made sure to shave everything, well, legs and pits at least. You’d let the forest reclaim the lands AFTER the dance, but for today and tomorrow, your legs and pits would have to be bare and maybe a little shiny.

THE DAY OF THE DANCE…

This was it. You were scared as hell as you anxiously sat in the seat of your mother’s car and double checked everything. Your legs and pits were shaven and soft with lotion you vigorously rubbed onto your skin, your teeth were brushed too but you still chewed some gum so it didn’t smell. And you wore extra deodorant and perfume so your body didn’t smell the way it usually did either.

Lastly, you made sure that this dress you chose wasn’t all messed up after you got your hair done at that place Midnight suggested and also had your nails all polished up. Looking at yourself in the mirror shocked you, lips shiny with gloss and eyes covered with that mascara stuff but it wasn’t like it was overdone. No you only had a minimal amount of make-up done because it wasn’t something you were used to but you could still see a little bit of a difference?

It was strange but at the same time you thought you actually looked kinda good. Especially now that you saw all of yourself in the mirror in your dress, your shoes, this weird purse that your mom gave you. It was kinda weird and yet weirdly exciting too. You felt like one of those princesses in those movies where the princesses were getting ready for the ball.

And you felt like surprising everyone too to let them all see their frumpy classmate all dressed up, because you were living for it as your happy mother drove you to the front of UA. “Have fun~! Please ask Inko-chan to take a picture of you and Izuku-kun!” She chimed and you perked up in shock, why did she mention Izuku’s mom?

Oh my God she wasn’t there was she…?

NOT FAR AWAY…

“M-Mom…! P-Please y-you really don’t…” Izuku was already blushing quite heavily as his mother did his tie for him, so she could take yet another picture of him. Oh my God his mother was at school with him, and his classmates were there and he could hear some of the females like Hagakure and Yaoyorozu cooing at how cute it was, while Aoyama, Tokoyami, Kouda and Ojiro glanced at him sympathetically before they went inside.

He was already nervous as hell and sweating bullets that he needed extra anti-perspirant. His teeth were brushed and everything, and he was starting to hate himself for not brushing his hair more. Even though that’s the way it was, naturally curly and yet still he wished it was a little straighter because he wanted this night to be perfect. You deserved perfect.

“I’m sorry Izuku! But I couldn’t resist! It’s your first dance with your first date!” However, Inko almost pretended to be oblivious to the fact that her son turned even redder the second the word ‘date’ came up in front of all his friends.

“D-Date?! N-No! No t-t-that’s not… I-It isn’t…” He stammered quite badly, even though he was starting to wonder, was this a date? No he couldn’t think that, he was just taking his friend out to the dance because you asked him out and he WANTED to go with you. His friend asked him out, he was NOT going to get over that…

“I-It can’t be I mean… no we’re just… f-friends…” Still, Izuku convinced himself that this was just a dance, because he still believed that you were way out of his league and he felt so lucky that you asked him out and that he would have this dance with you. Someone he thought was amazing, powerful and so…

“She’s beautiful…” Inko didn’t mean to ignore her son, but the second she saw the person he was going with she paused as soon as she saw you. And Izuku perked up a little bit in confusion when he heard his mother, but he gasped outloud as soon as he saw what she was talking about, eyes going wide when he saw that it was you.

He swore Todoroki must have been around with his quirk because Izuku felt himself freeze the second he saw you coming over to him.

You were smiling bashfully in the (F/C) dress that was long and flowing with the night breeze; there was shorts underneath, almost like a romper but it didn’t deter from how elegant it made you look. (F/C) shoes clacked with the ground you walked on, and (H/C) hair looking so beautiful, shiny in it’s unusual style, high up and tied in contrast to how you normally wore it. Your (E/C) eyes seemed to sparkle a little more today and Izuku couldn’t help but notice, his flushed cheeks burning even hotter as he couldn’t help but admire the way you looked in that dress, his mother was far from wrong.

You WERE beautiful. You were so beautiful…

“Izuku…! Is that little (Y/N)-chan?!” But then his thoughts were broken when his mom recognized this lovely young woman as you, and he nodded slowly, “Y-Yes… yes it is… and… s-she is…” He clarified, and agreed with what his mom had said earlier, god you were so beautiful…

“U-Uhh H-Hi! Hi Mrs. Midoriya.” Your smile widened when you saw Izuku’s sweet little mother and she was more than excited to greet you again. “(Y/N)-chan! It’s so nice to see you again! Oh my goodness… y-you… you’ve grown so much!” She remembered you as Izuku’s good friend, you were a sweet girl, definitely had that charm to you, and so it surprised her to see you looking… like an adult.

“Y-Yeah…! Haha… I uh… still can’t believe I’m here… but if there’s one person I wanted to ask out to this thing… it was Izuku. He’s… been my friend forever… and I wanted to dance with him.” You said somewhat shyly but sincerely as Izuku’s face somehow turned even redder.

“A-Ahhhh…! T-Th… T-Thank you (Y/N)… o-oh my God… I-I…I-I’m so g-glad that… y-you asked me out… I-I… n-n-never thought I would… g-get to go to… o-one of these things… b-but… t-thank you (Y/N)…” Poor Izuku could barely speak he was so flustered, still so awed seeing you looking so regal and so powerful. How and why you asked him out to this dance he’ll never know.

“Y-Yeah… y-you… you’re welcome Izuku. I’m… really happy to be here.” You said with a warm smile, which made Inko smile. But then she started to tear up when this made her realize that her son was all grown up, because just not long ago she remembered you and Izuku playing together, the two of you were so tiny and now you were going to a dance…

You were always so good and so sweet to her boy…

“Thank you (Y/N)-chan!! For being so good to my Izuku!!” She promptly burst into tears as you and Izuku both jumped and started to freak out a little bit when the poor woman started crying. “M-Mom! Mom it’s okay…! D-Don’t cry…!”

“M-Mrs. Midoriya…! R-Really it’s no problem! Of course!” Still, you and Izuku smiled and comforted the emotional woman and she did calm down… albeit purely for the sake to take at least 20 pictures of her son with you.

‘She bounced back fast…’ You thought in amusement as you stood with Izuku, hand in his as he was still blushing darkly and looking hella embarrassed when his mom kept taking picture after picture. “Mom I-I think that’s…”

“Oh just one more! It’s your first dance!!” She chirped as you giggled and kinda helped her by putting your head on Izuku’s shoulder and he nearly screamed and you swore he was going to faint when you hugged his arm and Inko took even MORE pictures.

“O-Okay I think…” Izuku felt bad for wanting to make his mother stop but this was getting embarrassing, “C’mon Izuku… put your arm around me, for your mom.” However, you convinced him to let her take one more picture as Izuku’s body trembled and his eyes went wide.

He wasn’t unfamiliar with being hugged, but it still made him incredibly anxious. At least until you smiled at him, oh God that didn’t help you were too beautiful. “It’s okay… just like this.” But your words and gentle touches somehow allowed him to calm down long enough as he swallowed hard and found his arm around you.

He tried to will himself to not blush any darker when he could hear his mother squeal as she took at least 10 pictures of that and you had to try not to laugh at how endearing she was. “Okay, okay! Thank you! I think I took plenty… have fun you two~!” Although she wanted to take a little bit more pictures of her son actually dancing with you, she decided to give her flustered boy a break so you and him could actually go into the building.

“W-We will mom…!”

“Oh we totally will!”

The two of you waved at the women before Izuku decided that now was a good time to go in, he’s seen this in movies before where the guy offers his arm out to the girl but he felt so shy and so anxious about doing so. He shakily brought his arm out for you to take, which you were more than happy to as you giggled.

“Goodness aren’t you a gentleman?” You asked him somewhat playfully as he started to stutter and blush quite heavily again, his face was so bright red you thought it was adorable and just wanted to kiss it all over.

“I-I uh… w-well u-um… I-I… h-hope so…” He admitted, although he didn’t want to brag and say he considered himself a gentleman because his mother DID raise a gentleman after all. However, he knew that you deserved just that, a gentleman.

“You are Izuku… obviously. Your mom is so sweet it’s only normal that her baby boy is just as sweet.” You smirked and teased him a little more as he perked up in embarrassment, “(Y/N)…! Don’t say that…!” He kind of whined when you called him a ‘baby boy’ and you just smiled and laughed, hugging his arm as his already flushed cheeks further reddened.

“That’s a good thing though… it’s why I asked you out.” You said rather fondly and this somewhat calmed the boy down a little bit, even though it still shocked him, it also made him really happy as he was able to smile at you. “I’m… glad (Y/N). I didn’t think I wanted to ever go to one of these things until… well… until you asked me out and I thought that maybe it’d be fun, because I’d actually get to go with someone I… trust.” He couldn’t bring himself to say ‘like’ because… for one he was already blushing just thinking about saying it, and on top of that, he didn’t want to just ruin everything by saying he liked you.

Even though he did, he really liked you, and deep down, he always has…

“Yeah… me too.” Nodding in agreement you and Izuku smiled at each other as you couldn’t help but admire all of these silly decorations, “Hee-hee… I’m almost thinking about going to Mcdonalds after this or something… what do you think Izuku? Wanna go someplace after this, maybe ice cream?” It was so awkward you had to say something that sounded like you and it actually made Izuku feel a little bit more at ease as he almost giggled.

“Sure! I think that’d be a good idea…” He was more than happy to accept that, if it meant getting to spend more time with you, then he’d go with you anywhere and even take you anywhere.

INSIDE THE GYM…

“What the fuck am I even doing here?”

Was all Bakugo could ask himself as he glowered at this entire fucking place with it’s annoyingly bright music and corny music. Who the hell was in charge of the music? And why the hell did they let Kaminari choose some songs?

Then again, some of these dumb old songs also sounded like songs you listened to. Bakugo knew of your taste in music, frankly he thought your taste in music sucked, but that was just you. And this theme, good God this fucking theme, it was definitely something you chose and he couldn’t believe it won.

Yet, he was almost bummed that you couldn’t even be here to see it. He knew how much you loved this dumb show, and he had to admit, it was cool. Those three dragons were fucking awesome. Dammit, you weren’t here…

He almost didn’t expect you to be here though, not after you were feeling too miserable to even get up out of your room. Although, Kirishima and Mina did tell him that you were feeling better. He wanted to go and see if you were all right, but he was also still kind of mad at you for going off on him the other day. Even though you had every right to, Bakugo was well aware that he wasn’t a good friend to you all those years. He wanted to apologize, but his damn pride kept him from doing just that…

Maybe he just leave, this dance wasn’t even fun or even getting close to anything resembling fun. He only came because Kirishima and Kaminari annoyed him into going.

“Aww c’mon man, it just started!” Kirishima tried to get his friend to stick around just a little bit longer, since they literally just got here.

“Well it fucking sucks already! What the hell kind of dance is this supposed to be?!” The theme was the only good part, but he didn’t want to admit that he wasn’t having fun because he was still not all happy because of everything that’s been going on with you and him. Kirishima knew though, so he smiled at his friend because he knew you were coming.

He just didn’t know that you asked someone else to dance.

“Give it a chance! I mean… it’s just getting’ started, the music and the girls are coming~.” Kaminari tried to tease him, but Bakugo could care less about the girls. All except for one, and he was certain that one wasn’t even coming. Dances weren’t your thing.

Dances weren’t his thing either. He thought they were a waste of time and still didn’t see the point of them. Sure he was cool enough to go to them, and anyone else who tried to ask him out was always rejected. Some were too scared to even ask him even if they wanted to, but you were somehow brave enough to, even when he rejected you.

Bakugo would never admit it, but he felt bad for you. Not just for the video, but for everything. All he’d done in the past, how he rejected you like that before the Sadie Hawkins dance, and the fact that you probably weren’t even coming because again, dances weren’t your thing. And he had no doubts that you didn’t ask anyone out because you were way too shy to do that, so he thought.

“Oh my God, who cares?!” He shouted angrily at his two dumb friends, much to Sero’s amusement as he tried to not laugh at his friends’ expense.

“Sheesh… someone’s got a wedgie or something…” Sero commented on how extra cranky Bakugo was to Mina, but she didn’t seem to be paying attention as she had her eyes on something else. She looked surprised, even amazed as she saw you peeking from behind the entrance door.

“She looks beautiful…!” Mina finally spoke and Sero tried to see where she was looking and his eyes started to widen as he quietly said ‘oh…’ and caught the attention of Kirishima when he noticed his two friends looking quite surprised.

“Oh… wow… no kidding... she is...” Mina wasn’t kidding, Kirishima had his eyes on you, in that dress, your hair, your eyes… you were beautiful…

“Who?! Yaoyorozu, Uraraka?” Kaminari then giddily asked, obviously he was expecting two of the prettier girls but he got the shock (pun intended) of his life when he saw his friends all looking right at you. He’d never seen you look so… beautiful… wow… was that really you?

“Holy Shit... wow... um... I uh...” And now he was stuttering, as if it were the first time he’s noticed how pretty you looked, and it was...

“Tch…” Bakugo had no idea why all his dumb friends were dropping their jaws though, it’s not like any of these girls were goddesses or anything. They were pretty but why were they so awestruck…

"...?!" But then he gasped and his red eyes went wide when he finally turned to see what they were all looking at. And it was you, in your (F/C) dress, flowing and elegant with your hair all styled up as you walked inside slowly, somewhat anxiously but with a shy smile when some of your classmates waved at you with wide, amazed eyes.

Bakugo didn’t think he was capable of freezing, but he couldn’t move, at the moment he couldn’t move or do anything other than stare at how stunning you looked. Nothing else in the world existed, just you as he watched the way you walked, the way that you moved, the way that you smiled so bashfully as if you didn’t know how beautiful you were.

It was such a stark contrast to your usual self, all dressed down and not dolled up, a look Bakugo grew fond of because that was just how you were and he always secretly thought that it was endearing. Yet, he couldn’t help but admire and appreciate this princess-y version of you, you looked so lovely, so captivating that he couldn’t and he wouldn’t dare tear his gaze away from you, or the way that dress hugged your body without showing too much skin. No, it showed just the right amount, and you had such lovely skin, and a lovely body to go with it. He slapped his younger self for being a fucking moron, calling you gross and ugly. Hell no, you were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his life.

“Man... (L/N)’s a little hottie...” Kaminari thought outloud, a bit more shamelessly than he meant to come off as Sero nudged him a little bit, “Hehe okay... you’re not wrong, she’s... wow cute... real cute...” He said just a tad bit more respectfully, but then it was Kaminari’s turn to nudge him when they could clearly see Bakugo paying them no mind, just you...

“Someone’s got a crush~.” Mina whispered to the two of them, who started to snicker and nod in agreement. 

“What...?!” But then apparently they weren’t quiet enough as Bakugo shouted at them, and that was enough to make Sero and Kaminari nervously smile at him. “Hey it’s cool dude! I mean... it’s like I said (L/N) is cool! Sweet, funny and cute!” Kirishima was obviously stunned by how different and lovely you looked tonight, but at the same time, he knew you had a little something-something to you even before you got a little more dolled up.

And all those times Bakugo would yell at him for being stupid, because it was just his way of denying the fact that it was true. Kirishima was always right about you, he always thought you were cute, sweet and funny in your own weird way, but no there was no humanly way Bakugo could deny it...

“Go get her dude! You should ask her to dance!” Bakugo was so lost in your beauty that he almost didn’t hear Kirishima and the rest of his friends urging him to go try and make a move on you as Kaminari and Sero aided the redhead in cheering as they were giving him thumbs-up and chanting ‘Go get her!’ while Mina giggled and snuck away to go with the girls.

“Shut up you idiots!” Still he shouted at them because they weren’t really helping even though he was GOING to go and ask you to dance, somehow... but the last thing wanted was to get your attention by looking like an idiot.

One things for sure is that he wasn’t going to leave this dance now. No, Bakugo was going to dance with you tonight. He wanted to dance with you, and maybe even actually apologize for being such an asshole in the past. He was an idiot back then for saying that stupid shit, you were the only girl in the world to him, and you were the only girl in the world he wanted to dance with.

Finally he snapped himself out of it, and found it in him to move again as you finally seemed to notice him. God, he thought it was adorable when he saw pink coating your cheeks as you gave one of your typical crooked smiles and awkward little waves.

Bakugo didn’t get flustered, but somehow you managed to do just that as he tried to glare at you like always but couldn’t fight the blush heating his cheeks. It was you, why was he so nervous around you now? You were his friend weren’t you? It didn’t matter that you looked like some queen who was missing her crown…

Oh my God it did matter, you were beautiful all along and he needed to have you, he needed to dance with you.

He took the first step, the music doing nothing to aid him as it played one of those corny love songs from America that he remembered seeing once in this crappy rom-com with you, Deku and Deku’s mom for that matter when you were all really little.

'Cause she's so high High above me She's so lovely~

Annoyingly catchy, but absolutely perfect, because you were more beautiful than Aphrodite. Your smile outshined all the lights in this room and Bakugo forced himself to keep going to you despite all of these new nerves coursing through his veins.

But…

In his mind he swore the music STOPPED the second someone else walked in right besides you, no one else other than…

Deku...

Deku?!

Bakugo cringed and gasped, looking shocked, horrified and absolutely appalled when he saw you with, with… 

Deku?! 

Deku of all people?!

“Hee-hee…”

He heard you giggling. It wasn’t the first time he’s heard you giggle with Deku, and it wasn’t the first time it pissed him off either, but right now, it pissed him off even more than usual as he snarled and clenched his fists the second he saw that fucking Deku smiling that stupid smile at you. As you held onto his arm…

The blonde’s eyes further widened as he started to gasp once the realization hit him…

Deku was here with you. Deku was your date…

No fucking way…

He couldn’t have that, he couldn’t let Deku have you.

And he was glad that all the girls rushed over to you once they saw their last girl show up, dressed up so beautifully that they couldn’t help but fawn all over you.

“OMG~!! GIRL!! That dress is FIERCE!!”

“WOW!! (L/N)!! You... you look SO pretty!!”

“No kidding that dress is... WOW...”

“Wow, it’s really nice, and it’s your color too, amazing...”

“Oh my goodness! (L/N)!! You look so good!! You’re… beautiful…” Mina, Uraraka, Jirou, Tsuyu and especially Yaoyorozu approached you and Izuku once the two of you came in together and they had to praise you for how beautiful you looked.

“Aww thanks Momo!” You called her by her name with a big smile, her eyes sparkling with joy at how you dropped the formalities as a token of friendship, “Oh! And thanks for helping me with my boobs! I couldn’t have gotten this dress without your help!” You then chirped happily which made the guys in the vicinity, but especially Izuku and Bakugo all blush quite madly with wide eyes of shock at such a statement.

“Oh it’s no problem at all! I was happy to help!” She replied rather happily as you giggled, “That’s my girl~! You are looking FINE tonight just like I knew you would!!” Hagakure then had to compliment you on how amazing you looked as you smiled at the invisible girl.

“Thank you Tooru… you were right.” You giggled a little bit when she was giving you a look that you couldn’t see, but you knew she was making it and she was right to. Because she always believed in you and she was always urging you to be more confident, and now you were. You found it in you, it was always there, it just took a while to actually act on it.

No more hiding, you were ready to be you. This was your ultimate ‘This Is Me’ Camp Rock moment as you grinned at the way everything looked inside this place, so this is what a dance looked like. This was where you and Izuku were going to dance.

“Ooooh~. (L/N)! Are you and Midoriya… here together to dance?!” And Mina picked up on it, Hagakure always knew but this really shocked the other girls, especially Uraraka whose smile looked a little extra forced as soon as she heard this…

So Deku did have someone ask him out… in hindsight… it’s a good thing she couldn’t bring herself to ask him here…

“Hee-hee that’s right…” You said rather shyly as Izuku blushed a bright shade of red once it became more obvious and it served to piss off Bakugo even more as he couldn’t help but overhear you talking to the girls, “I didn’t think I’d have the balls to but… I did it…” Chuckling nervously you started to blush as badly as Izuku was.

“I’m still shocked that you said ‘yes’ to be honest Izuku…” You admitted with a smile, obviously still a little bit self-deprecating which made Izuku smile sadly at you, “You shouldn’t be shocked… of course I said yes. If there’s anyone in the world that I want to go to the dance with… it’s you (Y/N).” He said a little more confidently, and your blush darkened as your smile warmed.

“Aww… Izuku… haha well hey! Music’s gonna play, let’s get our groove on~!!” You exclaimed and shook your hips a little bit as Izuku perked up nervously, but excitedly too. All-Might taught him how to dance last-minute just yesterday so he had this!

“R-Right…!”

He exclaimed as you and he were oblivious to the way Bakugo was glaring at you when he saw you both going to the dance floor, and he didn’t hesitate to follow you both with a furious, determined glare.

He couldn't and wouldn't believe it. You asked fucking Deku to this dance?! That was NOT going to fly. If anyone was going to dance with you, it was going to be HIM.

Not Deku, HIM!

TO BE CONTINUED...

#bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #bnha izuku #izuku x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #mha izuku #deku midoriya #bnha deku #deku x reader #deku x reader x bakugo #deku x reader x kacchan #izuku x reader x bakugo #midoriya izuku x reader #izuku x reader angst #katsuki bakugou #bnha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugo x reader angst #bakugo x reader fluff #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugou x reader #bakugou x reader angst #bakugou x reader x midoriya #boku no hero academia x reader #my hero academia x reader

[incarnateirony]

Without maybe putting too fine a point on it, based on your observation of the way the show is headed, do you think we're moving to an ending that separates all of TFW from each other? I know the diverging of Sam and Dean's paths is a big part of their journeys, but do you think that applies to Cas (and even Jack), too? I think of all of them, I'm least clear on what the rest of Cas's journey looks like from here (beyond the Empty-that's pretty clear).

If you watch nothing else of my videos, I suggest taking the time to watch Galactic Grudge and Destiny’s Reflection. It takes about 20 minutes total, requires headphones and 1080P and yes, I understand people with audio processing hurdles or language barriers might struggle a bit but long term it maps out a path that would take several hundred pages or more to map out in text.

That disclaimer out of the way as to why I’ve arrived at this destination:

Yes.

Not entirely, nor permanently. Death is nothing to fear. Once they stop fearing death, and especially once they break the system so people aren’t auto-sorted into cages of passivity without their People and Families -- once All of the Heavens function on grand scale like, say, Ash’s bar did -- once humanity has reclaimed the throne/garden. What IS there to fear? That’s the real question.

With the video TLDR spec minded, my hot take:

Whether before or after Cas gets yeeted to the Empty (probably after), he’s due to mirror Rowena’s unbirthing of hell for a long, long list of reasons. Which sure, is her final death. But it wasn’t her end, was it?

But it’s Castiel most definitely arranging a home in which the Winchesters can have peace.

While I see Sam being the one to throw open all the doors of heaven as Chuck did hell and lead a giant MOL resistance through it to TAKE back the throne (another reason I think Cas won’t be until after the Empty, because taking heaven back is  one thing but actually stabilizing it in all the omens of what happens if God disappears or w/e is another -- we’re talking 15.20 here) (also a note, berens wrote 12.22 as a two parter alongside Dabb for 23, and Dabb also wrote Inside Man where the Bobbies revolt), Cas is probably the one going to end up with that throne. Very loosely.

Because they can’t just throw it to their kid and put the weight of the world on his shoulders, it doesn’t break anything. And Rowena has gone from Cas foil to Cas mirror over the years, and even as far as, say, The Things We Left Behind -- much less later Funeralia when she actually MEANT IT, or anything else to follow -- it’s about regret over a child that our stupid battles pretty much condemned. Sam and Dean also have a foot in this story pond but it most centrally belongs to Cas.

So while Cas chases the path of the goddess (Mary, Rowena, Amara), and Sam subverts the allfather he was tied to this season (John, Chuck and yes, even histories of Dean himself), where is Dean? Well one, Dean’s always been tied to someone fans aren’t asking enough questions about right now: Death. Who is very, very prominent this year, and I think everyone has to go rewatch Two Minutes To Midnight right now, too. Focus on more than the pizza or even “one day I’ll reap god, too”. Just focus on it all. Hell, focus on the inversion of Death finding them inconsequential to them being important. Focus on it all.

Dean has emotionally lensed parts of Chuck’s pillar this season, but that’s not really HIS, that’s what Sam was directly tied to. Dealing with daddy issues has always been a Dean thing, and part of his residual anger and hurt are what drove him and Cas apart this year, so the Chuckmara mirroring he kinda filled that emotional slot, sure. But his mytharc positioning, I’m gonna need everybody to think about that.

Dabb has spent like, 2 years teaching people that it’s fine to let go in a mature way and process your grief. Both Sam and Jack got passed a philosopher’s stone in order from Dean to Cas to (cursed aeonchild), once in 15.09 and once in 15.13. The magenta light of death is on both Dean and Cas, but largely avoids Sam, and Jack after his rebirth, while they stand over the christchild in place of Joseph and Mary.

Be it Swan Song “I can’t keep treating you like a kid anymore; you’re a grown--well, overgrown--man”, to modern “But now... you are a grown man, and I am incredibly proud of you”; it’s recognition of the child as a man. Be it Dean’s 12.22 “I saw you. Back there. You’re ready for this.” -- be it John’s “What next?” while moving on. Be it “go, mom, be happy.” be it even when she died, and they thought of bringing her back, “I saw your mother’s heaven. And she is. Happy. She’s... with John. And there’s no hurt, there’s no pain, guilt. Just joy.”

Sam’s place is on earth. His chance to have a home. A family. Dean... Dean has a family. And sure, Sam does as part of that family. But to even be a head of a home. To HAVE a wife. And a son. To finish leaving behind his legacy. Dean... has his I’m sorry.

So let’s play a game, presuming relinquishing the angel’s hold on heaven is done. Saving Cas from the empty is done. But Cas is sitting on that heaven throne while they all look different ways on what to do. Sure, Jack could revive Sam and Dean and bring them back to earth even if Cas is stuck glued to heaven like Rowena is hell. But if Dean’s done his duty AND is proud of his brother beyond duty, if the monsters are all but taken care of short of some stragglers Sam’s legacy system with Eileen can clean up. And ultimately... someone still needs to raise Jack, yes-- what does that give us?

I saw you. You’re ready for this. Now, you’re a grown-- overgrown-- man. I can’t treat you like a kid anymore.

It’s okay, dadmom. You fought for me, raised me, loved me. That’s enough. Go. Be happy. I’ve got him.

So back to “Dabb’s Dark Side of the Moon, Ash bar, megascale”, well. I’m gonna say. They’re gonna need a good hand on deck for that dream to let people find their people, to find their heaven, hell, to decide if they haven’t found their people yet and go back and try again.

It’s not goodbye, it’s I’ll See You Later. Because there’s still parts of earth they can make better. Every day they can make it better. And once Sam has his life, full, he can and would rejoin them all, in heaven. Be that wayfarer bars or toes in the sand, a world where people, families--they’re just as real there as they are on earth, able to make their perfect worlds. Dean and yes, Cas, can go and make that world even ahead of Sam-- with John, and Mary, and whatever old friends they choose to see again. And Sam, and Jack -- and Eileen -- can live on earth. Because for years Dean has wanted Sam to have a life. And die old of something normal and have a kids and grandkids. Trial and Error (Dabb), anyone.

The issue is letting go without it either being suicidal ideation of destructive sacrifice. And I think that’s the framework we’re going to be delivered.

Could I be wrong, sure I guess, I’m human. But as of right now, that’s what I see.

Cas has always wanted to bring his People home. But who have his People become? While yes, being seated in that chair gives chance to make things right with a few remaining angels he would no doubt give a chance, humans reclaiming the garden and planet from the divine they surrendered it to (Hammer of the Gods, Dabb, if you read between the lines on the Billions of pagan gods), or reversing various sealings (Clip Show, Dabb, if you pay attention to how and why EACH WORLD WAS MADE TO BEGIN WITH and how many Falls there have been and WHY THE TABLETS EXIST TO BEGIN WITH), whatever. It wouldn’t really be about establishing authority--and in the end, I’m fairly certain the Castiel seated in that throne would be irrevocably human. Because it’s the human soul that’s immortal. Be it using his grace to establish a spell and reversing elements like in Sacrifice, or tied into the angel blood and human heart theme that’s screaming at us this year-- that’s pretty much where I see Cas ending up. 

So Dean and Cas separate off to heaven in one way, Sam and Jack another, but still fated to come back together. Sam will have Eileen waiting for him. And Jack to raise.

Because the point is that they were here at all and you got to know them. And when they’re gone, it WILL hurt. But that hurt will be a reminder of how much you love them. But learning to let go -- it’s a part of growing up.

I’ve seen you. You’re ready for this. I can’t keep treating you like a kid anymore. You’re a grown, overgrown, man, and I am incredibly proud of you.

Go, be happy.

“See you on the other side.”

If people can’t watch my vids and pull anything out of it, my second note is to go do a Dabberens rewatch. Pull up Dabb and Berens eps on superwiki, make yourself a chain. I WILL note most of 6 and 7 has been seemingly obsoleted by Dabb, which should surprise none of us with all the ball punches at season 7 he does, so if you wanna save yourself a few hours, feel free to bypass. Season 10 also seems to have been addressed in season 14, and everything after that is the onset of Dabb era, so once you get to season 11 (where Carver and Dabb were sharing) and/or 12 (where Dabb took over entirely), just do a straight run. I also won’t blame you for bypassing Bloodlines. 

But if you do truncate 6/7, and a few eps, I suggest replacing them with the finale of each season (4-14, 6 and 7 pretty much already addressed last year), because Dabb still heavily employs those whether they were his own or not. Before Carver came back Dabb was sitting in the upcoming showrunner slot even during Gamble era. Dude has been primed and paying attention for a long fucking time. Absolutely 0% of people should have been surprised at Dabb inheriting the show when he did. And he’s been telegraphing his ideas for this show for years. Notice how many eps I cited above have Dabb’s pen all over it.

It’s where my headspace already was but damn if it doesn’t put Dabb and Dabberens’ direction in scale.

So for all my talk of philosopher’s stone and Death and all of that, if you can’t bring yourself to wade through all 20 minutes of Grudge-Reflection, I ask you to at least think on symbolism here

[redfoxwritesstuff]

Of Dust and Ashes (Chapter 15)

Happy Friday and Good Morning! Less than TWO WEEKS until I see Betrayal! At this time I do expect updates for the first week of December to run according to schedule. How have you all been? Good, I hope? Things have been stressful here. My husband’s been sick with Man Cold and has had to take time off work so I’m stressed about money. But it is what it is and tickets are bought so stress be damned, Kit is going to NYC. 

Want to donate to the trip? Buy me a Kofi or check out @redfoxcrafts for some cool Christmas gifts you can buy! 

Clint x ofc

Rating: M for series

Chapter warnings: None

Masterlist

Chapter 15: The New System

Morning had brought nothing but dark clouds, wind and more inky rain. It was a steady drizzle with cutting gusts. Clint woke first, his whole body stiffening as he took in his surroundings. It wasn’t the farmhouse, nor the shed. It was jarring, waking to find himself not where he expected. Still it was something he was growing accustomed to. It was hard not to, with how often he would wake from a half asleep daze, searching. It was the warm body clinging to his that actually rose his alarms.

She was smaller than Laura, was hard in places where Laura had been soft. Laura liked to sleep on her back. Deanna seemed to try to burrow her way into his shoulder and chest, seeking something from him in her sleep.

She wasn’t Laura. Guilt nibbled at his mind as he tightened his arm around her, nestling her closer. Part of him knew damn well that it wasn’t right. Laura had only been gone a month and a half. Part of him wondered if it mattered at all, Laura wouldn’t be coming back.  

“Laura, forgive me.” Clint whispered, turning his head to breath in Deanna’s hair. The fruity smell of her shampoo was just a hint now. Guilt haunted him as he clung to her. That guilt wasn’t enough to drown out how comforting it was to have someone to hold.

He dozed as he held her. The rain pittered against the roof as he relaxed into the mattress. A smile tugged at his lips as her fingers flexed, running along his chest in her sleep. Pinned between her stomach and his side was the stuffed fox and plush blanket that meant so much to her.  

Eventually, the need to pee drew him from the bed. He tried not to wake her as he slipped out from under her. Somehow, he had managed. Stretching his arms over his head, he gave his back a twist this way then that. The harsh sound of his back cracking filled the room, far louder than he had intended.

“What was that?” She mumbled, sitting up and rubbing sleep from her face.  

“My back.” Clint admitted with a wince. “That kind of hurt too. Sorry, I tired not to wake you.”

“I don’t think backs should pop that loudly...”  

“Probably not.” Clint laughed and so the morning started.  

They took their time, enjoying breakfast and coffee. Once Clint was caffeinated, he went out to tend the travel garden. The weather had let up a bit from the night before but seemed to surge in waves.

It was late morning before they pulled out of the ally. It took over two hours to make their way fifty miles before they called it quits. The weather, though calmer than the day prior, was still fierce. It, combined with a scattering of cars and trucks abandoned or wrecked on the road slowed them down to a crawling pace. Clint drove carefully, but neither of them seemed to mind it.  

Most of the day passed with idle chatter as each avoided topics they feared would upset the other. Soon they called it quits and parked for the night. Clint had cooked them dinner that night, dancing to music as she watched with amusement. Once they ate, they passed the time with movies. It was light and tense somehow at the same time. Evening gave way to night, though one could hardly tell a difference between the two with how heavy the cloud cover was.  

“Is it weird that this feels too normal?” Deanna whispered as the credits began to play on the latest movie.  

She leaned against him, tucked warmly into his side with her legs propped up on the side of the couch. The pain was much better today, likely due to how sedentary she had been all day.

“What? Waiting out a storm with movies and popcorn as the world goes to shit around us?” Clint ran his fingers through her brown waves.  

“Yeah.” The movie played on, neither were all that invested but having it play offered a sense of normal. “Feels like we should always be doing…” Words failed her and her voice trailed off.  

“Some big survival thing, all the time?” Clint offered and she smiled.

“Yeah.” A yawn ripped from her.

“I learned a long time ago how mundane survival is. It’s okay to enjoy it, while it lasts. It’s times like this that make the hard times easier.”

“Will we make it to your place tomorrow?” Deanna didn't look up at him as she asked the question.  

“Probably. Unless the storm shifts enough to keep us in place, we should make it.”  

“What are you going to do when we get there?” Strong fingers ran through her hair, soothing her.

“Not sure. Laundry, for one. Hook you up to the electricity. Give you a tour.”

“Are you sure you want me to stay there?” There it was, Clint thought, the real worry. “I mean, it was your home. Their home. Her home. I don’t want to intrude on that.”

“She’s not coming back.” The words tried to stick in his throat. “You can stay wherever you want, in my house or your house for as long as you want. You can use whatever. Make yourself at home.”

“Do you mean it?” She whispered. “As long as I want?”

“Yeah, Dee. I don’t really want to be alone so… yeah.”

“What if I don’t leave?”

“Than you don’t.” He answered simply.

They let the silence reclaim them as they both focused their attention back on the movie. That was as close to a serious conversation either had felt up for. It didn’t take long for Deanna to drift to sleep.

~~~~~<3  

The weather was better today. Clint drove as they took turns nibbling on crackers smeared with a tuna spread. In the cup holders was bottles of orange soda, sweet and bright. The sky on the other hand, wasn’t all that bright or sweet.  

Clouds still hung thick but now they were whiter. They could even see where the sun was fighting to shine through in places. The radio was an ever shifting sea of soft static as it scanned the channels. They had it on in case someone was broadcasting something of note.  

“Clint?”

“Yeah? Wanna stop? We should be there in about twenty more minutes, maybe longer if the road is washed out but it should be fine.”

“What happened?” She asked the question she had been avoiding.

“What do you mean?” Clint knew exactly what she was asking but a man can hope.  

“To everyone? To the animals? To the world?”

“Oh.” She picked at her fingers as he sat in silence. She was regretting asking the question until he spoke again. “What are they saying?”

“It’s not a lot that makes sense, to be honest.” She shrugged. “Some people said it was the rapture, that its the end of the world.”

“You could say that, I guess. Hell, it could be what the bible meant. Who am I to say?"

“As for actual news, I’ve heard it had to do with the attack on New York but I kinda figured that based on the timing. Something about aliens, again. I guess there was a battle somewhere in Africa against the aliens or whatever and they won. I’ve also heard that it happened in Russia, New York or China. Some also say Russia or China found a new alien weapon and did it somehow. But how it happened? I- Everyone’s just guessing.”

“It’s crazy. You know, ten years ago, I wouldn’t even believe what you just told me.”

“Yeah. It’s crazy.”

“It’s not all that off, really. I guess there are- were, rather- these magical stones. Only a few existed and the more you had, the more power you had. Gather them all and you’re unstoppable.”

“Gotta catch them all.” Her laugh was brittle but Clint joined her in it for a moment anyway.  

“This guy- alien grape who called himself Thanos, managed to get them all.”

“Where were they?” She interrupted.

“All over the universe, apparently. I guess we had a few of them here on Earth.”

“What are the odds of that?” She mused. “I mean, a whole universe to spread them out in and having more than one here?”  

“Right?” Clint laughed, keeping his eyes on the road. In a weird way, it felt good to laugh about something that had in reality torn the very foundation of his life apart. “We- They, really- I guess, tried to stop him from getting them.”

“Where were you?” She regretted asking as weight seemed to crash against his shoulders. “I’m sorry, never mind. Forget it-”

“I watched everything that went down in New York from home. But I trusted them to take care of it. I mean, I’m just a regular man with a neat bow when you boil it down. I figured if they needed me, they would call. But they didn’t and I was on house arrest. If I knew it was all going to go sideways, I would have went anyway but I thought they had it taken care of. I should have gone anyway.”

“No, you didn’t know.” Her soft hand wrapped around his forearm. “You didn’t know.”

“But I should have.” His knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel.  

“You trusted them. In putting you on house arrest they said they had it without you. In not calling you, they said they could handle it. It’s not your fault they were wrong.”

“Anyway,” He cleared his throat and pushed his shoulders down, though his knuckles remained white. “He came here to get the stones hidden here.”

“Where were they?” She asked, not really able to believe the story yet why couldn’t it be true? People were worshiping Thor and even Loki now that the Norse gods had made themselves known.  

“Loki brought one here with his mind control stick, Tony had that one and put it in Vision. The other one was apparently guarded by a wizard.”

When she burst into what sounded more like hysterical giggles than anything sane, Clint looked over at her. They’d slowed, pulling onto the dirt road that would in twenty miles lead them to his home. “Are you okay?”

“A wizard?” She laughed more. “What is the world, an adventure quest story? Or game?”

“It seems like it, most days. Shit just keeps getting weirder and weirder for the last ten years.”

Silence stretched on for a bit, uneasy and heavy in the air before she spoke again. “All we can do is go on.”

“Yep.”

They sat in silence as the RV rocked as it climbed up the worn dirt road. It kicked up rocks and mud squished under the tires, leaving deep tracks behind them. The rain had almost stopped and for now was more like a mist clinging in the air. The droplets of water were far too small to hold the dusty and grime. It was the first inkling of a world where they water once again ran clear.  

They passed though a fence, standing tall and imposing. It was automated and Deanna was honestly surprised when it simply opened.  

“Camera.” Clint remarked. “Facial scans the driver and passengers. It knows me so opens.”

“Neat.”

“Hooked up to the Stark systems.”

The farmhouse was a brown splat on the ridge of a hill. Around the expansive property were hills and trees. It was all enclosed in a fence standing tall in the distance. The property was beyond impressive and with how large it seemed to be, Deanna had expected the house itself to be much bigger.  

There was a barn style shed off to the side, doors open wide. Inside was an old tractor, hay and so many things Deanna couldn’t even begin to guess their use. Clint pulled the RV up the last small rise in the road before slipping it into the space between  the house and barn. Stacked on the side of the porch was a pile of wood, waiting for someone to come along and finish chopping it.  

“This is it.”  

“It’s nice. I didn’t expect it to be so open.” Deanna wasn’t sure what to say, as Clint climbed out of the RV and rushed around to help her.  

“Yeah. Got a lot of land here. I wanted to make sure no one could sneak up or watch us without going through the fence. Stark put in the security system and backup power when he was here last.” He was silent for a spell as he helped her find her feet.  

She couldn’t walk, not really and while she managed almost within the RV, wide open spaces were a challenge for her. She hobbled and Clint wrapped his arm around her back, taking the weight off the still very painful ankle. With his large hand wrapped around her and gripping her side, he held his other hand out in front of her, offering it for stability. It wouldn’t do to help her and end up leaving her so unbalanced they both fell.  

He could have easily picked her up and carried her. It would have been nothing for him. She know that, she had seen his muscles and had been carried by him on that first day. It was nice, that he didn’t do that.  

Her hobbled steps were slow but Clint was patient with her. With great care, he helped her up the steps and into the house. Inside, he found her a wheeled office chair to roll around in, pushing herself with her good foot and holding onto the back to keep herself balanced.  

~~~~~<3

The wheels rolled noisily on the floor. The dust was heavy and each wheel left distinct trails crisscrossing all over the floor. It was tense at first, being in his house surrounded by the pictures and memories of the happy family that had once lived here. Clint spun the chair she was kneeling on as he walked by. He was cleaning out the refrigerator and moving excess flour, sugar and rice from the RV and into his pantry.

He took clothes, towels and bed sheets out of the RV, load after load, though there wasn’t a whole lot in reality. After dropping the first load in what Deanna assumed was a laundry room in the back of the house, the sound of another set of wheels filled the house. He came back through the living room, this time riding his own wheeled office chair.

She chased him through the living room, laughter flowing out of both of them as he rolled back to the front door. When he brought another armful of bedding inside, he plopped it on the chair and rolled it through the house with Deanna on his heels. She navigated the chair over the bump between the two rooms- something Clint told her he had been intending to fix forever- and into the laundry room where she started loading the washer.  

“I can do it.” Clint offered, unloading the bedding onto the ground.  

“So can I.” She didn’t even look at him as she put in shirts and jeans. “Some of these are clean?”

“You mentioned that you’ve been washing them in the rivers.” Clint shrugged. “I figured with how gross the rain has been, I’d rewash everything to get it clean for you. Really clean.”

Tears gathered in her eyes. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Clint nudged her from where she stood, knee planted on the seat of the chair and shirt balled in her hands. “Now go relax, let me get to it Dee.”

“No.”

“No? What do you mean, ‘no’?”

“I want to help. I’ve been sitting around just letting you do for me. I can at least sit here and load the washer, changed the clothes over without hurting my foot.”

“But you don’t have to. I don’t mind doing-”

“But I do. I’m not useless. Don’t make me be useless.”  

It occurred to Clint that this was about so much more than doing the laundry.  Reaching out to her, he rubbed her back in soft circles. This was a world that was all about what you could do. This new world, your value was dependent on what you could do. And right now, she couldn’t even walk.  

“You know you’re not useless.” Clint offered.  

“I am right now.” She snapped.  

He pulled her wheeled perch away from the washer as she threw a shirt inside it, far harder than needed. “Hey. Okay.”

She was sniffling now as she tried to figure out a way to say what she was feeling. “I just… If it wasn’t for you doing everything for me, I’d be dead right now. You have no reason to do anything for me. You have no reason to keep taking care of me. You have no reason. Let me do something. Let me give you a reason to.”

Clint wrapped his arms around her, pulling her and her wheeled perch to him and held her tight. “You’ve fed me.” He offered. “What you don’t realize is being alone was killing me. It was driving me insane. While yeah, right now you can’t walk, you’ve given me a reason to do more than sit around being pissed off at the world.”

“That’s nothing.”  

“It isn’t nothing. Don’t you get it? Until I found you, I woke up in a half mad grief induced daze and nearly every single night I’d go out looking for them. Because the decimation took out fifty percent of the living universe and how is it fair that I lost everyone. Half the time- I don’t even remember going out, looking and I’d wake up in the fucking town or standing in the fields without a shirt or shoes.” She sniffled, loud and ugly but he still smiled down at her. “When your foot is better, if you still want to be here you can clean and take care of the garden and hunt and build a castle if you want.”

“I want to do the laundry now, not later.” She whined before laughing in that brittle way he had come to realize was very much a sign that she was holding on by a thread. “I never thought I’d say that.”  

Clint laughed and leaned forward. It felt completely natural as he brought his lips to hers in a quick soft kiss. He held her for a moment longer before saying, “I’ll bring the laundry in.” and leaving her in the laundry room.  

As he walked through the house, the ghosts of his family looked on, judging him. He made a point to avoid looking at the family photos on the walls. Not once did he look the pictures of Laura in the eyes. As he walked by the fireplace he reached out and put a picture face down.

When night fell, the picture remained face down. Blocked from view of everyone was Clint, smiling wide and dressed in a neat black tuxedo. His arms had been around his smiling bride, dressed in a white gown that she had tried to talk herself out of getting because of the cost. She had about skinned him alive when he called the shop and gave his credit card information behind her back.  

~~~~~<3

Tag List: @usedtobegoodfriend96, @0-0-0-0-0-0-0-7, @tnystrk-exe, @theoneanna, @alexakeyloveloki, @toozmanykids, @winterisakiller, @j-u-s-t-4, @missaphrodite23, @bambamwolf87, @nonsensicalobsessions, @tinchentitri, @xoxabs88xox, @queenoftheunderdark, @myoxisbroken, @wegingerangelica

#clint barton x original character #clint barton x oc #Clint Barton x Female Reader #clint barton x reader #clint x reader #clint barton fanfiction

[nvrissa]

hello laid ease and furries ( u know who u are )......hahaha....are u ready for this ? zimzalabim ! my name is xan ( she/her pronouns ) and my laptop has been broken for a good 3 years now i have to use an onscreen keyboard so if u see me typing for 20000 years on discord only to send u a single sentence u know whats up x JSDBJWBJW here is the intro....im really winging this no one call me out for that WOOO....tw: medication, mental health, body image ? perhaps just to be safe <3

ok ! so im not gonna talk too much abt family stuff bc yuno and i are doing the collab of the century here and art takes time people ! JSBDJBWDJW but so u get a good idea...i will write a little abt it lets get it 

so the kwons were two of the biggest faces in hollywood ( and tbh they are still considered icons / hollywood royalty no matter how old they get they stay #Relevant ) think bradgelina ! literally everyone knows who the kwons if u dont u probably live under a rock /: 

their parents are very into the fame thing...so when it came to their kids ( nari and wolfe ) they SUPER pushed the famous life onto them, really expecting both of them to be just as obsessed and enamored by the public. idk if u guys ever say that vid of gigi and bella hadid before they were huge were their mom was pressuring them both to get into modeling and to stay skinny and to be stars etc....it was kinda like that !

so narissa, being the first born, really just internalized that shit...like imagine being told ever since u were a baby that fame and status and ur last name are wildly important and not being able to remember a time when u werent being watched by cameras / a third party ( the public ) bc that was her life ! nari has....no experience as to what life is like without cameras and without having to create this image of herself that ppl are gonna be into 

obviously that’s NOT normal....and it had it’s toll on her /: as a kid she grew up so fast like u know those kids that seem so mature and wise for their age ? that was nari. she always had two versions of herself: inside nari vs outside nari. she was so good at being good just bc she knew what stuff to express and what stuff to keep inside ( spoiler alert: most of it was kept in x )  

she is still very much desperate to please her parents despite it all /: i feel like for a long time she kinda excepted and agreed that fame is everything ( hence why shes known for using her last name to get her places ) but shes starting to realize just how FUCKED it all is and just how much it’s messed her up so stay tuned for more fun !

ok so career stuff ! nari started off as a child model bc she was um super cute and super good at knowing what to do / not freaking out in front of cameras <3 but she was always obsessed with actors ! she used to sit in front of the tv for hours legit study and memorize ppls mannerisms and various movie lines.. she was literally always just quoting random lines / imitating various actors so often her parents were like ok word go act !    

she landed her first role at 12 and it was a pretty huge role as a lead chara in a mini television series that revolved around a cast of kids ( think stranger things but not plot wise just how some of the mains were kids ) with zero acting experience before hand ... so it was pretty clear to the media nari got the spot bc she was a kwon ! there was a bunch of controversy around the show before it came out but once it was released...there was no denying nari had talent

after that it was just a whirlwind of acting doors opening up for her. everyone wanted nari bc of her last name and all the attention that came from it, not to mention every director wanted to be The One that helped narissa kwon become one of the most famous actresses of the 21st century. most of the time she was getting cast for selfish reasons but nari never realized it /: she was just happy to be acting bc it really was like therapy for her to become different ppl

flash forward to age 15 when narissa was finally diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and was prescribed meds to help ! it was actually a director from a movie she was working on that suggested to her parents nari might be struggling after witnessing her have a panic attack on set. not wanting a scandal, her parents agreed it was best to get her “help” which included pills and weekly therapy ! 

so nari actually didnt mind it too much tbh she HAD been struggling for a while she just assumed her anxiety was normal and just like something all famous ppl were dealing with but that wasnt the case. she was hesitant to open up to her therapist just bc she was still obsessed with this idea of inside nari vs outside nari, and she was very scared to cross that line so it took....years of sessions to build up that trust

as she got older though and as she got more famous, everyone just assumed she was better. she was more famous and loved by the day, she had become a chanel ambassador ( thank u jennie x ), her interviews on youtube always brought in record views, she’d started in plenty of movies critics agreed would become cult classics, her social medias were nearing kardashian level in terms of followers: everything was on track....

....except nari had actually never been more unstable. she had become so dependent on her meds she couldnt go anywhere or talk to anyone without popping a few in. all the watching eyes were starting to make her paranoid, not to mention the pressure from her parents ( who couldn’t be happier with nari being so famous ) was at its all time high. she had been nominated for an oscar at 21 and everyone was expecting her to win...and then she didnt

narissa kwon famously fainted at the 2018 oscars after it was announced she had lost the award. her actual fainting wasnt caught on camera or televised, but it WAS witnessed by some of the most relevant names and faces in hollywood who were in that room. the scandal took the media by storm, the hashtag #getwellnarissa trending for over 42 hours until a statement was released she had fainted bc of dehydration and other undisclosed causes and that she was okay & currently taking it easy at home surrounded by family 

in reality it was the abuse of her medication as well as all the stress, but when your last name is kwon manipulating the press is as simple as making the right phone call. unfortunately for nari and her parents, the article about the brat pack came out a week later, and there was no manipulating that source /:

for narissa, it was all a wake up call. she decided to go off her anxiety meds altogether. after falling out with the brat pack she spent that year trying to figure out who she was separate from her fame and her last name. despite some offers from a few casting directors ( surprisingly some people still wanted her despite the scandals bc she was still a kwon, after all ) narissa rejected every role except one in a coming of age indie movie that explores womanhood and mental health as well as strained relationships with mothers. the movie is set to release sometime mid august hehe (~:

she agreed to come to milan to reunite with the brat pack bc she’s still searching for herself ! nari figures the people who quite literally grew up with her might give her some answers......not to mention there is still a part of her who is desperate to reclaim the image and status she had before everything fell apart </3    

PERSONALITY/TIDBITS

narissa is....complicated to say the least. growing up in front of the cameras and in a family who prioritized fame and outside opinions of you as the most important thing, she is quite literally desperate for praise and approval. because she legit has no idea what parts of her are real and what parts of her she’s created for her public persona, she often looks for understanding in others!! shes very very good at analyzing people and understanding people in the hopes that its gonna make her better at analyzing herself, but to no avail. 

libra sun capricorn moon !! THIS is super accurate and telling if u wanna read but i kinda just summarized it in the last bullet

she is such a perfectionist with everything she does and a bit of a control freak in the sense that if she’s not the one doing something, she doesnt have faith whatever that is will be able to live up to her unrealistic standards. directors are often concerted with nari bc whenever she gets big roles.....she is so hard on herself, often asking for take after take bc she monitors every little thing abt her expression or her movements. she’s often left frustrated and disappointed with herself bc again, her standards are SUPER unrealistic ):

she’s relatively sweet!! growing up with the brat pack they probably knew her as the life of the party, very bubbly, confident, and very easy to have fun with as long as you’re being tolerable. however, she can get kind of opinionated at times so it’s very hard for you to gain her trust and respect back if you lose it. she’s also prone to random mood swings / periods of isolation, but whenever she returns its with a big smile and a soft voice assuring you everything is okay 

very good at lying and deceiving ppl but she hardly ever does it on purpose ( unless her publicists asks her too ). she’s carried this persona / public image of herself curated for consumption from others for so long, sometimes she has no idea when she’s being sincere or if she’s just convincing herself she’s being sincere. most of the time she only deceives other people about herself. she can come across as kind of elusive because of this ( think daisy from gatsby’s perspective ) but it’s not on purpose. she just legit has no true sense of self isnt that sexy?

speaking of sex. JWDBJWBDJWBD she also uses that as a coping mechanism / a weird affirmation that yes, she IS wanted by others and yes she IS seen as someone beautiful and that she IS something to be consumed by others ( like i said in my tags....male fantasies male fantasies ) but then at the same time she feels guilty abt this and so unsatisfied and disgusted at how she’s living her life as an object / manifestation of other people’s projections rather than as a normal person...rip </3 its a cycle

ever since her relationship with micah that was so hated by the public it actually ruined and ended their relationship, nari has been too scared to publicly have a relationship again. the media seems to love seeing her on casual dates with other stars, but not to see her tied down to one person, as that kind of “damages” this super accessible persona she’s put out ( think idols and why they cant date )  

she loves poetry, french music, all of marilyn monroe and audrey hepburn’s movies, nonfiction essays abt womanhood and identity, anything chanel, is particularly fond of silk dresses but is partial to velvet as well, wears lacy bralettes under everything bc it makes her a little more confident, actually prefers large parties to small ones because small gatherings are more personal therefore give her more anxiety, would only eat fruit and drink champagne if she could live like that, doesn’t know how to swim so she’s scared of the ocean as well as the dark, used to study ballet as a kid and misses it terribly, doesn’t know how to drive and isn’t planning to learn, can be materialistic at times, is probably an introvert masquerading as an extrovert for 22 years now, the only movies she cant stand are westerns, loves to travel but is scared of flying, doesn’t drink coffee, and is allergic to nuts. 

last but most important fact about narissa is that she loves her brother wolfe more than anything in this world so messing with him is the only way nari is bound to 100% hate you. she can bully him all she wants ( ex. starting very real rumors he IS in fact a furry ) but no one else is aloud to actually be mean to him or she will kill you

also very random but i had a hc that when she was 6 and her pet cat jinx died she caused enough fuss at home her parents actually made it a national holiday in about thirteen different states. the anniversary of this death is december 4th and yes . the brat pack better mourn jinx with nari every year......

pls spare plots im sorry this is so long.....JBDJBWJDBWJBWDJBJ i promise it will be worth it also im sensitive and very small ... how can u say no ? 

#bratsintro #╰ ♡ . 𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒆 𝒇𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒆 𝒇𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒔 ── ooc ! #yes this tag is inspired by the margaret atwood quote....bc i am Literally haunted by it #so is nari x #also this gif ? inspired by her furry brother<3 #this intro is a whole mess pls . plot with me anyway ? #THIS IS RIDICULOUSLY LONG HOLY SJBWJBJWBDJW yea i...am so sorry oy my god

[radmiraclehideout]

Story for mostlycowandpigtfs

When you got home you were ready to just settle in, relax, have something to eat, and then maybe sit down on the couch with your girlfriend to watch a movie together before getting to bed. You looked around to find her when she burst through the door with a bag that said weirdo's magic shop. You asked her "What did buy?" She had a smile going across her face " its a board game I wanna play with you its called Circe's island and its a turn based game where your character has to find a certain chest to escape the island. The guy at the shop said that it just lying around the shop and just let me have it. Can we play it now?" She said this  with an great deal of enthusiasm but, you had a hard day and just wanted to unwind. "I don't know. I'm kinda tired." She started to lookpretty disappointed which played on your heart strings a bit. Holding the box close to her chest she looked up at you with her pretty eyes. "Oh please I really wanna play this game with you." Now sitting at the table with the game set out in front of you. "So how does the game work?" She sat across from you reading the instructions. " So like I said before the goal is to escape the island before. To do that we have to find the chest that has the bag that holds the four winds while also, avoiding the trap chest. Its kind of like battleship each turn we pick a tile and flip it over to see if its a blank, trap or the four winds. Its says we're playing to beat Circe, our characters will start to change as we find traps, and that the game won't end until one of us gets the four winds." You looked over the board at the nummorus tiles. " ok so who goes first?" She pulled a coin from her pocket. "I'll be tails." She fliped the coin into the air onto the table showing tails. "Yes I get to go first!" She picked a tile close to the center. "Dang it!" It was blank "Hahaha you didn't think you would on your first turn did you?" She crossed her arms. "Hmph well lets see you try." You flipped the tile closest to you again blank. "Ha see not so easy is it?" You couldn't help but laugh at her competitiveness and her mild tantrums. "Haha well we just started. Lets keep going." The two of you went back and forth turning blanks for a couple minutes. " Dang it I can't believe we haven't found that stupid bag yet." You were more surprised neither of you found a trap after flipping so many tiles. " Oh well. Maybe this time." She reached over to flip another tile revealing a trap. "Oh no! dang it that sucks." She slumped back in her chair. "I wonder what's going to happen to your character." She sat back up leaning over the table. "Well since we're playing against Circe, she'll probably start to change into a pig like in the odyssy." She was pretty sharp when it came to Greek mythology. "Huh I wonder how we keep track." She looked up from the board. "That's a good ... Oohf! What the heck?" She turned to look behind her. "Oh my God what's going on!" She turned her back towards you. Her butt now stretching the seams of her shorts. "Aaahhh its still growing!" Just then her shorts took all they could and riped to shreads, along with her panties. It had to be at least three times the size it was before. "Uhhhh its so gross! Look at this thing!" Then something started to push out of the base of her spine and it started to curl. She grabbed a hold of her new assets as if to push it back in. " I freaking have a tail now!? A girl shouldn't have a butt like this, it's huge!" You watched as her butt jiggled as she frantically moved about as well as her new tail bouncing around just above it. You didn't even noticed yourself smiling. " This isn't funny! Why don't you take your turn already!" She was obviously embarrassed. "Shouldn't we stop and do something about... well... that."  You pointed at her new backside. " No remember the game isn't over until one of us win so, until then we have to keep playing so I can get back to normal now take your turn." Agreeing with her logic you reluctantly took your turn. It was blank. " Awww no fair!" "Well it's your turn now." She was visibly upset that you didn't get a trap. "Fine!" She reached over and turned a title close to you. Maybe to get some of your luck. It was a trap. "Aww now what going to happen!" She looked up and down her body looking for a change. "Uh oh." You said noticing her nose flatten turning into a snout and her ears starting to become pink floppy pig ears began to poke through her dark hair. "What's uh oh." She said looking slightly frightened. "You should look at the mirror." She quickly ran to the bathroom to see her pig like features. She let out a squeel as she turned on the light. She soon came back. " Take *grunt* your turn *oink!*" You reached over and turned a tile. Trap. "*Reeeeaaak* Yes! Finally!" You started to feel warm all over your lower body. You could feel it swelling. Suddenly you felt a surge and you too busted from your pants and had grown a curly tail of your iwn. But it wasn't over yet. You started to feel the warm sensation in your groin, you griped the edge of the table and spread your legs. Your girlfriend watched from behind as your testicles started to swell, sagging near your knees. Meanwhile your cock started to resemble a corkscrew. You turned to face the half sow. " Happy. Now take your turn." She came towards the table and as she passed by you she flicked your cock which was now sensitive you nearly feel to your hands and knees."well *oink* here it goes." She turned over another trap. She started moan as she feel her her chest then undid her bra. "Ooooohhhhh this one feels *grunt* nice." That's when her breast busted out of her shirt along with six new ones to match. "Ohh now I feel bloated and heavy.... I think I *REEAAK* know what's coming next." Her belly was now round and fat the shirt she was wearing was now in ribbons, leaving her naked. "Your turn *GRUNT GRUNT*" she said this in a way that made you think she was starting to enjoy this. You reached over almost hoping for another trap. Your wish was made. You quickly fall on all fours while rapidly gaining weight, your hands and feet becoming hooves. Your head being the only remaining evidence of your humanity. "Oh my god *GRUNT GRUNT* if we go much further we'll be full on *REEEAKK* pigs!" She said through her squeals. She apoached the board for what she was sure would be her last chance to reclaim her former self and flip a tile......Trap. "Oh god *REEAAK* this bad...noooo! *GRUNT GRUNT* not want be dumb fat sow *REEAAK*! Must hold *oink* on!" But she knew it was in vain, she then drop to all fours her arms and legs becoming shorter fatter versions of them selves, her fingers and toes fusing together into hooves like your own, her neck and cheeks thickened with fat and her face was stretching out into a muzzle. "Up you now.....mind slipping...... GRUNT GRUNT REEAAKK OINK OINK!!!!! " You now were face to face with a fat, dumb, sow who used to be your beautiful, bright, girlfriend an hour ago. Now it was your turn and it all rested on your now pig shoulders. You traughted over to the table and clumsy tried to flip a tile in hope of beating Circe......Trap. You felt your human thoughts flee from your mind as your new boar thoughts replaced them. Your snout shot out in front of you and your words became nothing but a series of grunts and squeals your attention was now focused on the sow eager as she ever was before.... for breeding.

[shamelessly4shameless-blog]

What we need. What we have.

Anon: Hi Han, please could you write a story. It’s a bit of a jumble but I have this idea of Mickey maybe trying to get someones wallet or maybe like a sweater back to them and Ian being a bit of a pest wanting sex but Mickey is trying to do a good deed? IDK. Please try if you think it might be good. Thank you! Love all your work so much! xxx

“Hey! I found a wallet!”

Iggy dropped down onto the sofa next to Ian and snatched the video controller out of his hand.

“Oh yeah? Any money in it?”

Ian cupped his now empty hands around a joint and lit up contentedly. Iggy shook his head and tossed it over Ian into Mickey’s lap.

“Nah, but it’s quality. Might get a couple bucks for it.”

Mickey plucked the joint out from between Ian’s lips and stuck it between his own, earning himself a scowl

“Jesus. Does anyone in this family ever ask for anything?”

“No.”

Both Milkovich’s smirked in unison and Ian shook his head, suppressing a small smile.

“Assholes.”

Mickey quirked an eyebrow at the insult but didn’t respond as he opened the wallet and began prodding through the contents.

There was an old photo, two men stood side by side, arms around each others shoulders. There was something about the pose that didn’t strike Mickey as being merely friendly. It was too intimate, their bodies pressed too close. He flipped the picture over and read the note on the back

‘Jack and Jim. August 1977. Love is Love.’

“Where’d you find this?”

He asked, passing Iggy the joint.

“Over on Newly Avenue. Was just lyin’ there. Weird.”

“Why weird?”

Ian let Iggy have a couple of puffs and then reclaimed his smoke. He didn’t mind sharing but Iggy could be like a human chimney with weed and Ian wanted to get good and baked and take Mickey into the bedroom for an afternoon of really filthy sex. The kind that would leave his boyfriend close to exhaustion, his lips swollen and sore and his body quivering on the bed, too wiped out to even clean himself up, letting Ian pamper him without complaint.

“Because it was like no one else could see it. You drop a wallet it normally gets snatched up like fuckin’ birdseed.”

“Birdseed?”

Ian spluttered, handing the joint back to Mickey who waved it away, once again rifling through the compartments in the little black leather pouch.

“Yeah like cause people are like birds and they swarm free shit.”

Iggy grinned around the joint as Ian dissolved into a fit of giggles.

“Doesn’t have an address in it.”

Mickey mumbled causing  Iggy to frown at him.

“Well they’re clumsy, not stupid. If it had an address I’d have gone round and roughed the asshole up for a reward.”

Mickey gave his brother an impatient look and stood up.

“I’m headin’ over there. You wanna come?”

“What? No! Don’t ...”

Ian scrabbled to his feet, following Mickey to the door

“C’mon. No one is giving you a reward for an empty wallet Mickey.”

Mickey switched his impatient look to his boyfriend and shook his head

“I don’t want a fuckin’ reward and it ain’t empty. It’s got personal stuff in it. Someone might need it.”

“What?”

Ian scrunched his face up, confused

“Since when do you give a shit about stuff like that?”

“I … fuck you. You comin’ or not?”

“Fine. But I was hoping we’d spend the afternoon in bed. Together. Naked...”

“I can fuckin’ hear you!”

Iggy called over his shoulder and then returned the middle finger that he didn’t have to look to know his brother was giving him.

“Yeah well. Newly ain’t far. We can do whatever nasty shit you want later.”

Ian pouted and zipped his hoodie up firmly

“How’d you know it was gonna be nasty? Might have been sweet.”

Mickey snorted and held the front door open, ushering Ian out

“Not likely when you’re stoned. You always want to get your tongue right in ...”

“STILL FUCKING HEAR YOU!!!”

Iggy roared and Mickey slammed the door firmly behind him.

*

They walked the couple of blocks to Newly in relative silence. Mickey had the wallet in his pocket and kept his hand on it possessively. Ian slung his arm around Mickey’s shoulders once they were a little way away from the Milkovich house and Mickey let him do it which was a surprise. A pleasant surprise but still …

“You Okay?”

“Yep.”

“Sure?”

“Yep.”

Ian rolled his eyes and moved his arm, letting it fall in a clumsy arc to slap his palm teasingly on Mickey’s ass.

“Fuck sake! We’re in public, Ian.”

“Not my fault that ass won’t quit.”

Mickey’s lip quirked upwards but he tongued away the smile and shook his head

“You’re a fuckin’ pervert.”

“Says the guy licked jello off my nipples last night.”

“You fuckin’ put it there!”

Ian grinned wickedly and leant in close enough for his breath to tickle Mickey’s ear

“Wasn’t me who smeared it over my ass.”

Mickey glanced around furtively but the street was empty.

“Also, it’s not me who likes things to get a bit rough.”

“The Hell it isn’t!”

Mickey stopped dead, making Ian have to back track to him with a shy smile on his face

“Well ...”

Ian considered whilst Mickey looked up at him with utter incredulity

“Do I need to list every damn time you’ve left a bruise on me?”

“No … I mean, it might be fun but you don’t need to. Maybe just tell me about the ones you enjoyed most?”

Mickey narrowed his eyes at Ian. The redhead was far too handsome for any of his expressions to be called a ‘leer’ but the one on his face was damn close. The difficulty was that despite Mickey’s outrage his treacherous body was reacting all too warmly to Gallagher’s nonsense.

“You’re an asshole. And a pervert.”

Mickey managed finally, shoving Ian lightly and thumbing his lip to quell a smile that would undermine what little dignity he had left.

Ian danced around him as Mickey continued walking, every now and then darting out one strong hand or the other to touch Mickey lightly, mostly on his butt, and ask

“The one I left here?”

“How about here?”

“This one?”

Mickey shook his head, desperately trying not to either laugh or shove his boyfriend into oncoming traffic.

“I’m gonna leave a real good one on you later.”

He growled as Ian bounced in and touched Mickey’s nipple through his shirt, raising his eyebrows in silent question.

“Promise? Leave more than one.”

“Jesus, Gallagher.”

“Aww come on, I can handle whatever you can give.”

Mickey gave in and smiled down at his boots. The thought of beating Ian was, at that exact moment, rather appealing but not really something Mickey was likely to be able to do and they both fuckin’ knew it.

“You ain’t handlin’ shit, Firecrotch.”

“Is it because you just want to be sweet to me? Treat me nice?”

“Right now? No.”

Mickey glanced around again but didn’t protest as Ian stepped in again, pressing his chest flush to Mickey’s.

“You want to be good for me, huh?”

“What the fuck, man?”

Mickey could feel the colour creeping into his cheeks. They were in the middle of an empty street, in broad daylight and Ian seemed about ready to have him right there. His hands gripped Mickey’s upper arms tightly and his eyes focussed intently on Mickey’s own deep blue iris’.

“I’ve been real bad, Mick. I need you to teach me a lesson. You can’t always be sweet to me.”

Ian purred, his lips grazing Mickey’s earlobe.

“Okay, but maybe not right here?”

He raised his eyebrows in warning and Ian finally bit his lip a little guiltily and stepped back, hands stuffed in his pockets.

“Sorry. Got carried away.”

“Yeah, kinda.”

Mickey gave him a final ‘what the fuck’ look and then shrugged. He loved it when Ian told him exactly what he needed and Mickey loved to please him, whatever that looked like on any given day.

“I mean … uh … you’ve started something now, you know? I’m gonna have to sort you out later and you’re gonna have to deal with that.”

Ian’s embarrassed scowl lightened into another slightly cheeky grin.

“Yeah?”

“Oh definitely. You’re done, Gallagher.”

Ian bit his lip and his eyes lit with expectation but mercifully he seemed content to just revel in what Mickey had said rather than demanding more. Mickey huffed out a heavy breath and gave Ian a side-on look before dismissing it as him just being a horny eighteen year old. There had been some weird shit lately but Ian had been stressed. Svetlana, money, South Side … all of it. It was fucking hard, Mickey knew that. If Ian wanted something to release that tension – a bit of blood on his lips, having someone push his buttons, or getting his ass whooped, well shit. Mickey understood that and was more than happy to oblige.

*

As they turned onto Newly, Mickey squeezed the wallet in his pocket a little tighter. There was a lady rummaging through her bags and a couple of kids hanging out on bikes but not the sort of person he was looking for.

“What’s the plan?”

Ian asked and Mickey shrugged, irritated with himself for not having a plan.

“I guess walk up to the end of the street, walk back down, if no one is looking for a wallet, toss the fucker in the trash.”

“Cool.”

Ian nodded, falling easily into step beside his boyfriend. Mickey smiled slightly to himself. This was one of the things he liked most about Ian. He could be a bossy, inappropriate asshole one minute but then when Mickey needed him to shut the fuck up and just go with something, he was always down for it. Whatever stupid fucking thing it was, Ian would do it if Mickey was doing it. He wasn’t afraid or ashamed to help. Mickey valued that kind of loyalty very highly and hoped he could return it at least a little.

He licked his lips, looked around once, and then squared his shoulders and grabbed Ian’s ass cheek in a tight, full palmed grip, hard enough to know that the skin beneath the denim was bleaching white around the outline of his fingers before flushing pink.

“And don’t fuckin’ distract me while we’re doing it. You’re in enough shit.”

Ian looked momentarily shocked and then a slow, sexy smile spread across his face. Mickey tightened his grip, making Ian wince.

“The fuck you smiling at?”

“Nothin’. Sorry.”

Ian physically wiped the smile from his face and Mickey nodded, releasing him. Ian walked a little closer, his arm brushing lightly against Mickey’s, and there was a definite spring in his step but clearly Mickey had got the game right as Ian just walked, saying nothing.

*

They walked up one side and had just started to come down another when Mickey saw a guy up ahead peering intently at shrubs and in gutters. He couldn’t see his face but hadn’t actually studied the photo that much so doubted it would help anyway.

“Hey. You lose something?”

The guy looked up wearily

“I don’t want any trouble, son.”

“Me neither. You lose something?”

Mickey gripped the wallet a little harder. He thought it might have been the dude on the left but he really didn’t know.

“Yeah. My wallet.”

Mickey looked over his shoulder and tongued his lip, pulling it out of his pocket. Ian startled and gave Mickey a confused look which his boyfriend ignored.

“This one?”

He held it out and the older man’s face lit up.

“Holy shit! Yes! That’s the one.”

He reached out for it and then stopped looking at Mickey cautiously

“Go ahead, it’s yours. Ain’t got any money in it though.”

“Ha. Never had any to begin with. Thank you. Truly. Thank you.”

Mickey shrugged. Now that the deed was done he just wanted to get out of there and head home with Ian.

“It’s cool. I figured you’d want what is in there anyway.”

The man, Jack or Jim, pulled out the photo and glanced between Mickey and Ian with a knowing smile.

“Love is love, boys.”

“Yeah well. See ya.”

Mickey didn’t look back at Jack/Jim but Ian did and saw the little picture.

“Aww Mick.”

“What?”

“We walked all the way over so you could get that guy his picture back?”

Ian’s voice was all soft and hopeful and … proud? Jesus. Mickey gritted his teeth and pressed his lips together.

“Why? I mean it’s so nice of you but why?”

“Because ...”

Mickey looked around, more furtively than he had when Ian had been talking dirty to him, more cautiously than before he grabbed Ian’s ass and then, satisfied no one could hear them, he murmured

“Cause I have a photo in my wallet too. Fuckin’ suck if I lost it.”

“You do?���

Ian cocked his head to the side and Mickey nodded

“Yeah.” “What’s it of?”

“Mind your own fuckin’ business!”

*

Later that night, with Mickey passed out in bed and Ian trying to find a comfortable position to sleep after then delightfully thorough working over his boyfriend had given him, reminding Ian exactly of the capabilities of the man he fell for, Ian slipped out of bed.

He picked Mickey’s pants up and patted the pockets until he found his wallet.

Under the light of his cellphone, Ian pulled out the folded photo and after one final guilty look at Mickey’s sleeping form, unfolded it.

“Aww Mick.”

He whispered. He wondered if he still had that beanie, or that shirt and made a mental note to find both if he could and wear them the next night ... and be as sweet to Mickey as he could be. He had everything he needed and things he had not even known he wanted. And Ian wanted Mickey to be able to say the same.

#shameless #Shameless US #shameless fanfiction #Ian Gallagher #ian x mickey #mickey milkovich #iggy milkovich #Gallavich #love

[cantskank]

today i was going through it a bit, emotions-wise

so first of all:  (fuck your fucking attitude/how could you be so fucking rude?/you look at me like when girls are jealous)

i didn’t get any sleep last night (like i stayed up literally all night, then had my remote classroom discussion period where i didn’t contribute a single thing, then had my meeting with my advisor, then passed out for like 3 hours, then had “lunch” at 3:00).  i was already like physically a wreck.

so early early morning i saw a post from someone i follow on my actual tumblr basically about not using queer? or tagging it as the q slur or whatever.  and it’s an entirely moot point because this person doesn’t follow me and (prolly) never will but it just really threw me.  it seems like it’s not for sketchy reasons- p sure they identify as an nb lesbian so nothing like terfy going on, i think it’s from like family related trauma which is totally understandable!  like i really wanna have a lot of compassion for people who feel that way for that reason (and no compassion for terfy reasons). 

i think for asexuals in particular there is a lot of stake in how acceptable the term queer is.  like, i quite literally cannot fit in the “lgbt community.”  i can probably fit in the lgbt+, lgbtq, lgbtq+ communities; there’s probably room for me there; and i definitely fit in the lgbtqia+ community (assuming they don’t have the a for some ally fuckery) BUUUT queer is definitely a term that has always felt comfortable to me, even before i knew i was aro ace (but knew something was off with me, sexuality-wise.  not that i vocally used queer before id’ing as aro ace but it was always a viable option for me and if i had been asked prior to learning about aspec orientations i might have said “queer in some way”).  and i think a lot of aspec people feel the same way.  as aspec people, excluding any allo orientations or gender minority, just as people who by some variety feel an absence of attraction (as laid out by society as a whole as “normal” attraction(s)) we are not, by definition, part of the lgbt community.  but i think there’s very little issue calling ourselves queer based on being aspec.  and terfs and exclusionists know this, and that is literally the reason they insist on queer being a slur.

also in defense of queer as a term: it is literally reclaimed!!  meaning, the act of calling oneself queer is done in order to take back the term from the people who wanted it to hurt you with it.  “queer is a slur” yes that is literally why it has been chosen to represent the community!  “queer as a term has been weaponized against me so personally and intimately that i cannot associate with it” is maybe closer to what people want to say, since “queer is a slur” is like yes?  that’s why people use it?

and like the thing is it’s been used, literally the first time i heard “queer is a slur don’t use it” was in my last year of university (~2017)- the same university where the organization for lgbtq+/queer students was literally “queer (name of university)”.  i first learned about queer as a reclaimed term in 2011!  and there was an acknowledgement of “yes this was/has been a slur, but it’s reclaimed” but absolutely not “this was a slur and it’s still a slur so always fucking tag for it since apparently reclaiming a word only goes so far as the people who care to reclaim it, everyone else gets to insist it is still a slur and has a negative power over people.”  okay that’s probably not fair but it just feels like backwards progress.  and i did just look it up and i did only go to wikipedia but wikipedia says it’s been used in a reclaimed sense since the late 80s (i would have guessed sometime in the 90s but i knew it wasn’t a new thing).  how! can! this! still! be! a! contentious! issue!

(i mean we all know why it’s so popular now, it’s all terfs.  and again, there are legitimate reasons to not like the term but i think the main reason it has any traction is because of terfs and that is just fucking depressing.)

so like, there’s a lot in terms of how acceptable and valid my identity is that gets tied up in this question, and to see someone i really look up to reject it really threw me.  i was going to throw something in here about how i had a revelation that my moon in my 4th house meant i rely a lot on community acceptance and validation for my emotional state (and my internal acceptance of my own feelings- so like i can only validate my feelings if i feel a sense of community acceptance/consensus/belonging).  then i checked my chart and i misremembered.  my moon is actually in my 8th house (in gemini) which is still watery community vibes but 8th house is a lot more interpersonal i feel.  still sourcing a lot of validation from others, lots of emotional interdependency i guess.  and i just checked the cafeastrology blurb, and i do agree with it and don’t think my interpretation is too much of a stretch.  and to me it explains my interest in partnership/a qpr down the line, as well as my emphasis on emotional intimacy and a bit of platonic jealousy.

anyway, so i was kinda emotionally thrown by that.  then in dear prudence’s livestream today, the first q was about disliking the term queer.  danny and grace are both trans so i was like nervous the “real” queer/lgbt people were going to kinda dismiss queer as a term but it was good!  they did really emphasize how common that viewpoint is amongst terfs (a reference to “conservative lesbians” as well)  also sidenote they are both beautiful humans.

anyway clearly i have lots of feelings about this but i want to get to bed so here’s a lightning round of the rest of the reasons i’ve been feeling vaguely shitty and mostly just overwhelmingly negative:

still stuck inside (duh)

also team pinata privated their videos because of online harassment, dissociadid is also taking a break and i’m just like really worried for both of them.  like again, not feeling stably good and that is hard to see.

haven’t really been keeping in touch with people which means i’m feeling very isolated as well as very guilty for not reaching out to them, and also like “this is why you don’t have any friends.  you deserve all the blame for having basically no one in your life, a thing which has become abundantly clear when you’re stuck at home and like people aren’t reaching out to you.”

someone who i have been in contact with (basically all my contact with) is my mom, which i feel like isn’t very healthy.  and she’s probably doing it to check in on me which is really nice.  but right now i’m struggling with questions about kinda who i am and what i want to do (like with my life) and i think i struggle with these questions 1 because i’m in fucking the middle of nowhere and hate my living situation and hate my life (this is really probably the biggest part of it, i feel completely hopeless and should probably be seeing a therapist because i would feel very unsurprised if i’m severely depressed) but also somewhat 2 i’ve always tried to live up to my parents’ (and let’s face it, mostly my mom’s since dad was not v available) expectations and would do literally anything to make them “not mad at me” which is a very juvenile turn of phrase that i think shows how like entrenched this is for me.  i am just really used to ignoring my own signals in favor of their approval?  so like i probably don’t fully know what i want.  and being in grad school (which like i’m a year and a half in, this is not a new situation so idk why it’s hitting now) is the 1st time i haven’t been dependent on them??  which is a big like “thing” for me.  i always felt i couldn’t be super confrontational with them because i was always supposed to be grateful for everything they did??  so like you can’t complain about how i’m talking to you because i’m taking the time out of my day to give you a ride.  or you can’t talk to me with “tone” because we’re feeding you and you should be grateful.  and like i was always trying to be less dependent on them for that, but if i did i wasn’t “accepting help”, i was “always trying to do everything on your own”, i was “pushing them away”.  anyway, in university they were paying my tuition, in my year off i was living at home.  and i’m super privileged to have that, and i’m unbelievably thankful.  but, now i’m truly on my own and i’m trying to figure out what that means.  and it’s hard when i’m constantly talking to people who bring me back there.  also i worry i am “too okay” with talking to them now because they’re like actually nicer now?  so like i’m ignoring my own valid feelings from the past which i didn’t feel like i had the space to acknowledge as valid because i was always trying to “be good” and “make it up to them” for like disagreeing with them?  and now that they don’t have a hold on me in terms of like living with them- now that i have options- they are nice so i don’t reexamine the conciliatory ways i behaved towards them when i was younger?  idk.  it’s tough.

also had a meeting with my supervisor today re: my crappy paper that we’re trying to make less crappy.  it went like mostly fine- like she didn’t tear me to pieces.  last time i met with her was about a proposal and she started the meeting with “i’m questioning how much you want to be here” which is just like really hard to hear.  so i didn’t hear that this time, which is good (great).  some of the stuff when she was explaining seemed like aimed toward a super basic level and it’s like is that how slow she thinks i am??  like.  i know i’m probably not smart enough to be successful at the thing i’m going for which is fucking terrifying.  a year and a half in, i feel just way too dumb and idk what to do except just keep trying??  idk we’ll see.  then she just sent an e-mail about like compiling the literature and i slack way too much on that and idk like we both kinda know that?  so i’m a paranoid freak and i always read so much into everything but getting that was like “i’m trying to remind you that you’re behind on this and a failure!!  but not addressing it because you’ve cried a couple times and so i don’t want to give feedback that might be hurtful.”  like lol.  i am good if you give me super harsh feedback.  probably it’s better.  i don’t deserve to really be handled super gently like that.  it’s okay if you want to be more no nonsense about it, i can handle it.  at least with that i know you’re mad at me??  as opposed to being nice?  then i can’t tell if you’re genuine or if you’re trying a more passive-aggressive approach.  i’m a bit dead inside, i can deal if you want to get your disappointment in my failures off your chest.

also my just severe difficulty with no order or routine.  i’ve been wondering for like over a year now whether i have like executive function disorder??  it could also just be the being in quarantine where everyone has trouble focusing.  i do relate to a lot of the things i see about it.  i really should just be going to a therapist.  probably once i’m off my parents’ health insurance (okay i’m dependent on them in that way, though i can also opt for the school’s insurance) so they don’t know/wouldn’t be on the hook for them (and feel entitled in some ways to know about that.  i really really really don’t want to tell them.  like, anything)

wow this is a fucked up amount of text.  goodnight.

[omgnsfwisnsfw-blog]

NSFW #2.1 It All Begins Again

OOC: title is intentional :P

A few months ago, the two of them watched from their knees as their world was ripped away from them. After that, John felt it was necessary to reevaluate his worldview. A source of their misery had confided to them that now they finally understood the lesson he was trying to impart. To be like him. Those ideals would soil their legacy as champion just as John believed they defined this person that while he begrudgingly respected, cared very little for. And so he wanted to go home. His request was obliged by his partner, a person who, deep down, couldn’t deny him anything. If John Bishop Church asked for the moon, Mike McGuire would find some way to pull it from the sky for him, catastrophic tidal activity be damned. Yet, even though they granted him what he asked for- the immediate cessation of their current occupation- it didn’t sit well with them. Far from it. The abrupt loss of something they’d loved so much for so long, for the second time in their life no less, filled Mike with a heaving sea of bitterness. One night’s full expulsion in the form a destructive eruption of white-hot temper should have quelled it, at least they’d hoped. They didn’t want to direct their anger at John, as he’d had enough denied him in his life. And after a long discussion, Mike resolved to let it go, to get over their bad feelings over leaving what was, in truth, a toxic environment and start over. No more complaints were made on Mike’s part, no sulking or wanton destruction. There was, however, a slightly distressing amount of Labatt Blue. John noticed. Usually sat in his recliner and read as Mike imbibed. Whatever was on the television became the subject of their anger. The Mets losing. The Bruins winning. The worst though is when Mike flipped to their previous employer. The anger was laser focused. Two weeks prior to their sudden reemergence, it had been a night just like that. “Motherfucker.” Green eyes, slightly hazed over, glared at the handsome Texan brandishing the ornate gold belt, their lips curling into something between a sneer and a snarl. The ugliness being directed at the screen seemed out of place in the cozy, if not mismatched, living room. Their hands balled up into taut fists- well, one did, and the other gripped the amber glass bottle so tightly that it seemed that it might shatter. “Look at that fuckin’ pukestain. Sittin’ pretty at the top of the goddamn heap. Somebody shoulda knocked him into the fuckin’ pits by now. And a’course the tag division’s going down the diarrhea dumps. All that fuckin’ work for shit. Good job, guys, fuckin’ A.” There was a mild slur to their words, though it was hard to tell as they spoke through gritted teeth. The bottle was raised to their lips, sucked dry of its last dregs, and dropped to the side of the couch, clinking against two of its previously drained fellows. John looked up from Sue Monk Kidd’s The Invention of Wings. He adjusted his reading glasses on the bridge of his nose. “You could always change the channel.” Mike blinked as if they seriously had not considered this as a possibility, eyes flicking to the remote on the end table, staring at it bemusedly before picking it up and starting to idly run through the channels, little split-second mismatched bits of programming fusing themselves into an incomprehensible chain with every flick of their finger, before finally sighing hotly and clicking the TV off altogether. “Or turn it off,” he turned the page. “...don’t it piss you off at all, though? We busted our fucking nuts to make something outta nothing, and the moment we leave it’s just as big a pile of shit as before. It ain’t just pointless, it’s fuckin’ disrespect.” “Yes. We said as much,” John didn’t look up. He agreed to the joint statement but he also thought it gave people false hope as if the two were coming back to right a wrong. But that is where the business decision came in. He had concluded that they would never be featured and that tag team wrestling would never be taken seriously. It would always be considered an afterthought or a contingency plan. Jealousy was an ugly emotion to confront but it felt justified here. So he let go. Something tugged at the corner of his mind and it was an obvious declaration at this point, “Why not go somewhere else?” If they’d still been holding their beer bottle they would have dropped it, and legit surprise seeped its way into their somewhat drunken expression.“Are you serious? I mean… I mean I thought you were done, outside the one-offs here an’ there. All that stuff you said about not knowing how much you had left in the tank an’ not wanting to push it.” He remembered as such. Part of him enjoyed playing local celebrity. There wasn’t a day out there when someone didn’t ask about about NSFW. About reclaiming what was theirs. They shared his partner’s drunken sentiments. John marked his place and set the book aside, “You’re right. I don’t know what I have left. But I believe that leaving this unsettled could cause issues.” As if in a moment of sudden clarity, Mike glanced briefly down at the trio of empty bottles, and thought about the few others dropped into the recycle bin at various points in the day. Giving a soft sigh, they looked down at their hands, teeth nipping at their lower lip, “If it’s just because of me I don’t wanna do it. Look, I’m sorry. I’ve really been trying and maybe I ain’t being altogether fair. But I said I’d deal and I’ve been doing my best. It’ll come in time, I just don’t...” They swallowed, sighed. Looked up almost sorrowfully. “...don’t want you to do something you really don’t want to just cuz I’m being an ass who can’t cope like a normal person.” John leaned back in the recliner, “No, that’s not it. I wouldn’t still be training. But beating on kids fresh out of Race’s school at the fairgrounds is starting to lose its appeal. One of them asked for your autograph right before you broke his nose.” “His nose oughtn’a been in the way of my fist. Learn to dodge, kid, fuck,” Mike laughed, the peal fading off into a sigh, albeit a lighter one than before. “Alright. So if this is something you really want- and you know I’m on board- then where do we go? I mean we’ve been getting offers from everywhere from Atlanta to fuckin’ Zanesville, and I… heh. I may have been holding onto ‘em in case you changed your mind.” “I’ve seen those,” John didn’t mean to be dismissive of Mike’s excitement but he had seen those offers. Middling gigs that were of little substance. Although, a few weeks ago, they’d been walking out of the aforementioned fairgrounds. Someone, he couldn’t remember their face, handed him a flyer. The slip of paper had a curious logo on it. An inverted triangle made up of three letters. For some reason, John kept it. He retrieved it from his wallet and handed it to Mike, “But what about something more international?” They took the piece of paper, gave it a once over, and smiled broadly, “Valor Pro, huh? Shit, some of the best times we’ve had’ve been travelling the world. Let’s do it.” With business conducted, the newly minted Valor Pro Wrestling tag team looked ahead to a major challenge. Church and McGuire had talked a big game and their new employer clearly took notice. These sort of sessions between the two were usually private. But something about this place compelled them to be more intimate with their discourse. And so propped up on a kickstand, Mike’s phone filmed their discussion. Start of next month, NSFW would make their official debut in the capital city of Morocco. There was a palpable excitement between the two as they wouldn’t be hand held through a corporate approved set of appearances. Their promotion would be their own. That rush dissipated as the pair sat at the dining room table with an open manilla folder between them. Bio sheets of their opponents, scribbled with John’s notes and Mike’s doodles. Berlin’s mustache suddenly had roguish curls while Brenna had devil horns and a forked tongue. Mike gestured to the former. “If you want me to be honest, an’ I know you do? I got no clue what to make of this guy. I mean, Brenna we know, kinda. She’s dangerous as shit and just as unpredictable. This Berlin dude, though… damn. Might’s well be an alien landscape.” Mike looked up to their partner- he’d always had an uncanny gift of insight that would definitely serve them well here. “What do you think?” “It’s what we wanted.” “I know that. New places, new people. I’m excited. But what I mean is, I can’t get a bead on Berlin and you’re really fuckin’ good at reading people. You see something I’m missing?” “He seems nice.” Mike sighed, shaking their head with a mild chuckle. That, it seemed, was that. “Yep. He sure does. So… how do we approach this, you think?” John looked at the still photos of Brenna and Berlin. Notably, the warm expression lent towards Berlin after coming up short just moments prior. His fingers touched them briefly, “That’s new. Well, not new,” he shrugged and closed the folder. For a brief moment, John’s eyes steeled, “We aren’t here to make friends. These two are in our way.” “Good eye. But I’m wondering if the same kinda tactics people tend t’ try and use on us- the separate and destroy shit- would be an advantage or an invitation to get ourselves killed. Unless…” Mike’s eyes found their partner’s, a devious grin flicking over their lips. “...the one on the ‘destroy’ end is the one most likely to get all murderous-like.” “It’s a matter of not hesitating,” John answered, “because she won’t. Our association with her has always been at arm’s length and her career aspirations have always been unclear. And while these two have a history, she’s shown that walking out on her partner isn’t out of the realm of possibility.” “Yeah, just because she’s flirty as shit with me doesn’t mean she won’t beat me up. Nothing personal, but it is what it is,” Mike shrugged, “For that point, Berlin doesn’t seem like the type who likes being tied down to anything either. Talks a lot about nomadic wandering and shit.” “And so why is he here?” John’s question was rhetorical. Mike picked up on the flicker of sarcasm but not many others would, “This is our chance to reestablish just who we are. The premier tag team in this sport. And what I’ve seen out of Berlin thus far is a kind of lip service towards this business. Coasting on an undeniable level of ability. Thus far, I get the inclination that he thought he had it easy coming up on his last time. And for the first time, he faced some real adversity and the result was…” He tapped his fingers on the table three times in an all too familiar cadence. “And Mike, believe me, we’re a brick wall.” Mike nodded, beaming, “They’re good, but they’re still two guys. We’re a team. We’ll show ‘em what the difference is. This ain’t a hot date, this is a Number One Contendership shot for those gorgeous-ass Chimera Tag Team belts. They belong to a team who eats, sleeps, and breathes tagging, not just another combo of two people tagging cuz it’s convenient. I mean, fuck. It’s not like being a couple alone makes for a good t--” They stopped themselves. “And that, I think…” They looked to the camera, their palm hitting the lens in an abrupt cut to black.

#archive

[windup-warrior]

Prompt 27: Fling

A Case of Maybes

“But maybe love doesn't have to be about lust, maybe I could learn to love, maybe.”

― Jane Green, Mr. Maybe

The creep of winter upon Eorzea had me pining for home. Unlike summer in this place, winter’s chill was just what I was used to. Coerthas, Ishgard, and even Dravania were all well beyond cool by this time of year. I missed them, especially when compared to the dry heat of the Goblet or the seabreeze briney air of Mist. Graham and I had talked about venturing to Ishgard, maybe for a week or a weekend or even just a day trip. It was easy enough to do, but something to just… get away for a bit. The perpetual pressure upon his shoulders needed some form of release and I didn’t think it was a terrible idea to escape. After all, I was so very good at it.

Preparations found me at his house, a tastefully decorated, moderately sized house with a beautiful view on the hill in one of Mist’s housing wards. And by preparations, I mostly mean I was sprawled across his couch, my chin propped up on my arms while I watched him fold freshly laundered clothes. It was such a mundane and domestic moment, a comfortable sort of normal that we didn’t often get. He glanced over at me periodically and on an occasion or two, I even caught him smiling my way. Eventually I excused myself to grab us drinks from the kitchen downstairs, returning just a few moments later with a pair of tumblers, each filled a few fingers full with amber liquid. When I offered his over, he took it as an opportunity to take a break, sitting back to sip from the scotch while he fixed me with a lingering look.

“I figure we can hop to Camp Dragonhead around midday, settle in there for the night, maybe raise a little hell before heading up to Ishgard.” I offered out, filling the silence with my thoughts made manifest into actual words. Settling back in with my own drink, I sat closer to him than I had been before, turning to face him fully as I sat.

I spoke, he drank, and then finally he bobbed his head in acknowledgement between sips. Eventually he offered out, “Either way, we’ll make it work. Hang a little in Coerthas, then find somewhere with a view, hole up for a few days, order room service.”

I snapped a point at him, wholly in agreement. See, this was why I didn’t mind going places with him. Our tastes were similar, simple but specific. As he finished, I smoothed my hands over my thighs, bare from the hemline of dark wash frayed shorts downwards. “Order room service, not get dressed for a few days. Live in robes or sheets. It’s always funny when the room service people try not to stare.”

“I think you just like showing off.” He accused. Accurately at that. After a moment, he rose and slid the few paces it took to sit down beside me, turning his head to touch his chin down on my shoulder. “I could use the break though.”

“So you get the break, I get to show off. It’s a win-win, is it not?” I grinned and wriggled in beside him, ducking beneath the loop of his arm until I could twist and swing a leg over his lap, turning to face him as I sat atop his lap. Balancing his scotch in one hand, his other hand wrapped around my waist and smoothed down over the curve of my ass, reaching far enough that he leaned forward and lightly bit at my shoulder.

“It’s a win, yes.” He agreed, squeezing me tight against him. There was an underlying stress that he held in his posture, I could only hope to help diffuse at least some of it before we left.

“What else do you want to see while we’re there?” I asked, sneaking my glass in between us to guide it to my lips for a stolen sip followed by a quick second one.

“I don’t know.” He mumbled against my shoulder before leaning back and tipping his chin up just enough to kiss me. It was one of those long, lingering ones that involved pleasant sounds and indecent amounts of tongue. When he finally spoke again, it was to murmur against my lips. “We’ll find something but we’re already gonna do the one thing I want. So really anything beyond that is icing.”

His mouth was a terribly distracting thing, so any thoughts I had were left to fall away in favor of tangling tongues and an ample squeeze of a grope for good measure. Though he spoke, my eyes stayed closed, an assuredly pleased smile angling itself across my mouth. “There’s plenty to do and see. I’m sure I can fill that time pretty easily. Or there’s plenty of me to do too, so regardless. It will be a good trip, right?”

“You’re there.” He replied with a grin. “That’s all I need to make it a good trip, Karma. Everything else is a bonus like I said.” He kissed me again, only shorter this time, then leaned to bite my neck gently. It was more of a graze of teeth than anything. His arms tightened around me slowly, possessively. From my neck, he moved to my ear to nuzzle his mouth there. The heat of his breath on the shell of my ear under other circumstances would have easily led to more carnal responses but the sweetness of his words had me smiling in spite of myself. My fingers caught his jaw and turned his mouth back to me where I could press a gentle, short lived kiss to his lips.

He took the opportunity to snag me by the wrists, stealing my glass to set it aside with his. Shifting both of my wrists together, he wrapped long fingers around them, keeping them pinned together so he could kiss me a few more times. “It’ll be good, so deal with it.”

“I’m trying to deal but you’re being awfully distracting, you know.” I countered, speaking between kisses and teasing a rock of my hips against his.

“I don’t know, you open up pretty easy with the right pressure applied in the right places.” He grinned again, lifting his hips briefly to meet my grinding. “Distracting? Distract back. Or change the subject.”

“Hardly fair. True. But hardly fair.” I scoffed, lifting my chin to affect an air of haughty indignation to match my tone. I tugged against the hold he had on my wrists at much the same time I shifted my legs to settle more on his lap, my ankles hooking beneath his knees. “But it’s kinda hard in the position I’m in, so I might have to settle for a subject change.”

Maybe. But not before an angled buck of my hips to make him either reclaim his hold or let me go. Either way.

“Yeah, something’s hard.” He shot back, grinding his hips up against me as his fair brows bobbed. “Must be me. Must be your fault. But it’s a good kind of blame, I think.” For all of the joking and teasing, he stared into my eyes and though it was a little bit carnal, there was also something else there. Something deep.

“I just thought you were happy to see me.” I grinned and wriggled against him. That grin softened to something more private, befitting the moments where it was only him and I. My fingers curled until I could graze against his grip on my wrists. “I think I would be okay with taking the blame for that, misplaced as it might be. Here I thought it was all your fault…”

Then he kissed me. Slow, sweet, and deep. He let time stop when his tongue curled around mine and allowed the world to melt away. Nothing else mattered in the moment but the melding of his mouth to mine. The taste of scotch on his lips. The smell of my hair as it fell around our faces in a veil of honeysuckle and freesia with a touch of vanilla and mint. I made soft sounds of approval and encouragement, squirming. Not the sort of squirm that had me wanting to get away but rather the contrary, as if I could press myself against him completely. After a few moments, I hummed a little purr against his mouth and mumbled softly. “Hey Graham?”

“Yeah?” He drew back from the kiss to peer up at me.

A lick of my lips to catch the lingering taste of him led to a nip at my bottom lip where my teeth lingered in a slow graze. “I love you. That’s all.”

He paused at that, the silence hanging between them for a few long moments before he was reaching back for my wrists and pinning them anew. “I know.”

I let out a quiet laugh and bounced my hips against his. “Seriously?”

“Why so surprised?” He grinned and nipped at my lips.

“I… I don’t know?” I said through another laugh, tipping my head to one side in a half-assed attempt to avoid his nipping teeth. “I don’t know what I thought would happen but definitely not that.”

“Oh, come on.” He dipped his face lower and nipped repeatedly at my neck instead. “It was perfect.”

After a few moments of giggling and squirming, I finally conceded. “It was… stop teasing.” 

“Say it to me again?” He asked quietly, breathing the words against my neck.

A warm flush filled my cheeks and my mouth went dry. The first time it had rolled off of my tongue easily, but put on the spot it was a whole different monster. Twice I swallowed, quiet for a long moment before whispered. “I love you, Graham.”

"Probably a good thing," he conceded softly in reply. "Because I love you too. A whole fucking lot."

"Oh." Because what do you say to that. I tightened the wrap of my legs around his and pulled against him, nudging my chin against him to get him to look up again. "Oh good then."

Because that would have been really awkward otherwise.

"So..." He painted on his best smile. "Wanna... make love?"

I giggled and scrunched my nose at him. "Shut up and kiss me."

Maybe this was the new sort of normal that I could get used to.

#FFxivWrite2018 #writing prompt #prompt 27 #fling #Karma #Graham #slice of life #fluff