#but like for real sincerely deeply having insane thoughts kinda caring

[mrgaretcarter]

i wish everyone would like, care about women

#but like for real sincerely deeply having insane thoughts kinda caring #not like 'care' because they know they have to #best i can explain it is through that SNL sketch at an interrogation room where they talk abt moonlight and la la land #women are moonlight in that scenario

[good-beans]

Day 3: Angel/Demon

I wanted them to switch because it fit too well to make Minegishi the angel and Shimazaki the Demon... and something about love is blind... and something about the original temptation and plants going together... yeah

This one also has a lil drabble that just kinda happened LOL. It's my attempt at writing seduction (so I'm sorry ahead of time adfgbjj) but nothing actually happens 👍

"Why don’t you come with me tonight?” Minegishi asked.

“Mm?” Shimazaki tilted his head, the halo angling with it. “What do you have in mind?"

“Well… ” they tried to get their words straight, but it was difficult with the glowing, powerful, and rather attractive angel leaning in to hear them. “Why don’t you come and... find out?” they finally managed. 

Shimazaki let out a laugh. Love was blind, but it wasn’t that blind. “A nice try, but you never were great with the pick-up lines. For a demon, you’re not too great at this whole temptation thing.”

The other’s tail twitched in annoyance. “And for an angel, you’re not very nice.”

"Just last week you complained I was nice to everyone.” It was a true accusation, and Shimazaki felt no qualms about it. It came with the job -- he was kind to anyone and everyone who crossed his path. Even when the angel himself wasn’t inclined to offer any real kind words, it was his duty to flash a charming smile, shower on some flattering words, and make the people around him feel special for but a moment. It was an odd sort of life, constantly giving out love without ever loving. 

Regardless of how sincere he was, Shimazaki lived in a constant state of showing care, which may have been why the most apathetic of demons had taken such a liking to him. “ You seemed a bit put out by it. I would say that envy doesn't suit you, but I guess it does...”

Shimazaki didn’t know the half of it. Minegishi was used to lying, and they would continue to do so about how insanely jealous they had felt recently. Watching the angel toss around that pretty smile to every human he crossed, pouring out love to all those undeserving little creatures was infuriating. It seemed they had as much envy as greed within them because of how badly they wanted it. Well, those and another one of the seven sins… 

As distracted as they had been, Minegishi was quick to recover. They said simply, “if you think I’m that bad at temptation, maybe I’ll have to go back to the basics.” The demon got to work, trees and vines rising from the ground around the pair.

Shimazaki was fully prepared to turn them down despite whatever lovely thing they were growing at his feet. He wasn’t one to be so easily swayed by pretty flowers. He knew from experience you could gift those without giving a damn… But the smell of apple blossoms and sweet fruit made him inhale deeply. It was delicious. 

He felt Minegishi behind him, their hands carefully running over his wings. He’d received a lot of compliments on them over the ages, and Minegishi was no exception. The demon’s comments on their beauty had sounded far more terse than the others he’d received. Shimazaki had always assumed it was because they weren’t genuine. Sure enough, they gave another quick, “I like the way these shine,” as they combed their fingers through the feathers. 

The touch made him shiver. “Thanks…”  

At that moment, with the sweet smell of apple filling up his senses, Shimazaki wondered for the first time if those were the only genuine compliments he’d ever received regarding them.

“Tell me more.”

“Hm?” Minegishi could hear the change in his voice. “I didn’t think angels were the narcissistic type.” Were they rubbing off on the goody-two-shoes angel? They sure hoped so. Minegishi plucked an apple from over their head, inspecting it. The shape, color and texture seemed too good to be true. It was.

“I mean it’s kinda my thing.” he shrugged. “I like to see people in love.”

Minegishi leaned over his shoulder. They slid one hand across his shoulder, dipping onto his chest. With the other, they placed the perfect fruit in Shimazaki’s hand. “You want me to show you love?”

The angel took it, a smile creeping onto his face. The way his heart was racing, the way he was leaning into their voice -- maybe they weren’t as bad at this as he thought.

The demon’s lips were right in his ear. “Then you definitely should spend the night with me…”

#shimamineweek2021 #minegishi toshiki #shimazaki ryou #shimamine #i had a ton of fun with the designs/concepts for them -- im real happy with this one :D #my art #rose writes! #mp100 #to add

[fairuzfan]

Inumaki and Okkotsu: The Pattern that just keeps on.... Patterning

I always found it quite odd how Yuuta outright decides to kill Yuuji after the Shibuya arc. Sure he’s Sukuna’s vessel but he too was the subject of an execution order just last year. Surely he understands that the people the elders decide to kill are for their own benefit, people they see as a threat to their authority. So Yuuta should find a friend in Yuuji, even if he did cut off Inumaki’s arm. Besides, isn’t killing him a bit of an extreme reaction?

But the thing is, for Yuuta, it’s not. And if their positions were reversed, if Megumi had been hurt by Yuuta’s actions, then Yuuji would probably react in a similar manner too.

In an earlier post, I mentioned how Panda says that Inumaki and Yuuta’s circumstances are similar, in that their cursed technique has had such a profound affect on their relationships with others. This sets them up to be foils and rivals, much like how Yuuji and Megumi are as well as Gojo and Getou. 

And with each of these pairs, the pattern that keeps repeating is with one character being far more focused in their goals and their interactions and the other being more world minded with the people around them. 

Gojo and Megumi are shown to only be concerned with the people directly around them, not really sparing much thought about the people they don’t know. Yuuji and Geto are so sympathetic to the people they haven’t even met, people they may not even make a connection with, making it a central point in their character’s conflict. 

With Inumaki and Yuuta, it’s far more complicated because we haven’t really seen the point of view of one of the pair but I’ll try. I’ll probably add more to this post when we learn more about Inumaki but until then...

Toge is described by others as a kind person, someone who cares about how his cursed technique will affect others. He’s similar to Yuuji in that regard, someone with a power they have no real control over but try their best to contain it. Yuuta, who has had far more internal reflection and development, is also afraid of harming others because of Rika. 

But for Yuuta, he’s only concerned at the hint of an instance where something might happen, like when those bullies were pushing him around in Volume 0. 

This isn’t a negative thing really. I mean, you can’t really predict every time something might happen that may cause Rika to lose it. So him only being concerned about this when it happens is quite reasonable. And it’s not like he never tries to stop these things from happening. He tried isolating himself for most of his life and realized that it’s just not possible. It isn’t until he comes to terms with Rika that he feels more comfortable interacting with others. 

Toge, however, still isolates himself in a way. He limits his speech, while still being friendly with others, but never truly connecting though words out of fear that he may inflict something terrible to the people who talk to him. So even to people he doesn’t know well, he keeps his distance out of concern for them. 

But Yuuji and Megumi never had this problem, not really. Getou and Gojo didn’t either. Each pair has their own central struggle they have to deal with. 

Gojo and Geto’s is perception of self as it relates to others. Megumi and Yuuji’s is morality of protection of life and its overall importance. 

For Yuuta and Inumaki, their struggle is the need for connection while under the understanding that connection implies mutual harm and how to navigate that without isolating yourself. 

And their cursed techniques are a perfect depiction of this. They both have potential to do great harm and try to avoid it. But the only way to avoid it is to distance themselves.

Because of this, they see each other as similar souls, people they’re concerned for. That’s Yuuta becomes so angry on Toge’s behalf. 

And it’s not just that Yuuta is trying to get justice for his friend.  Yuuta become protective of Inumaki because he cares for him, but also because they’ve gone through the same things. Yuuta sees himself in Toge in a way that he doesn’t see himself in anyone else.

Someone who was so thoroughly affected by their cursed technique that they couldn’t fully connect with others the same way everyone else did. Yuuta’s trying to get justice for himself. 

And there’s something else I found odd here. The “I don’t care if he’s Master Gojo’s pupil.” Right away, he closes himself off from a connection to someone he could relate, and he realizes that. He basically admits “If I got to know him, I’d probably like him and become friends with him since we had similar circumstances.” He refuses the possibility of connection, something that motivates Yuuta’s entire character, in favor of vengeance, which, by the way, we aren’t even sure Toge wants.

Like Megumi, Yuuta chooses the people directly around him, people he’s already made that connection with and forgoes a new connection because of the destruction Sukuna caused towards his friend. Yuuta’s acting on his own personal conscious, not the ideal of what’s right or wrong on the grand scheme of things.

We aren’t given Toge’s viewpoint of the issue at all. We aren’t shown his resentment or forgiveness. We just show the physical consequences of when Sukuna went hogwild and made him lose his arm. Yuuta makes the executive decision to kill Yuuji, speaking on Toge’s behalf.

For all we know, Toge could hold no resentment towards Yuuji and not want to see him dead (which is where I think this is headed. I sincerely hope for a physical confrontation between Yuuta and Toge, where Toge forces Yuuta to admit that significance of Yuuta’s existence rather than just the threat of Sukuna’s.). Or it could result in Toge supporting Yuuta and turning against the first years (which, imo, goes against the core of Toge’s character but I could still see that happening and breaks the pattern of opposing viewpoints between best friends. We haven’t really learned much about Toge from himself and mostly have had secondhand accounts of his personality.)

Which now, I’d like to go back to my earlier point. I kept likening Megumi to Yuuta throughout this but I said that if their positions were switched, Yuuji would do the same thing as Yuuta. 

Yuuji has been shown to be protective of the people around him and that’s been exacerbated through the Shibuya arc. When Naoya mentions his intention to kill Megumi, Yuuji get’s defensive. 

But like, who wouldn’t? Some random guy says he’s going to kill your best friend. But this is a little different from Yuuta wanting to avenge Toge, since Naoya outright states his ill intentions.

 And... that’s kinda not the point, either way. Yuuji has been watching so many people he’s been close to die around him despite wanting to give them a proper death. So as it builds up, his resolve to not “kill” anyone and preserve life, slowly starts to disintegrate. 

So they start to fight. Yuuji with the intention to protect his friend but coincidentally Yuuta comes in about to start fighting him as well. Now we got Yuuji fighting to defend Megumi and Yuuta fighting to avenge Toge. Two sides of the same coin. Maybe they both have the same intentions too, with Yuuji wanting to kill Naoya to counter Yuuta’s intention to kill Yuuji. 

Don’t get me wrong, Naoya is not a likable guy and personally I can’t wait for his reckoning, it will be oh so sweet. But he’s still human. Yuuji seems to have drawn a (very faint) line that he “kills” curses but will not do so to people. He confronted Noritoshi Kamo only with the intention of retrieving his Sensei, not anything else. But with Naoya, who imo embodies so many aspects of humanity that it’d be better off without, he’s genuinely a selfish guy.

He’s like... Mahito. He does things for his own benefit and doesn’t really care how that affects others. We know Yuuji ended up having no qualms about wanting to kill Mahito. 

And then Yuuta, well, he basically sees Yuuji as Mahito. To Yuuta, Yuuji’s a guy who chooses life, the selfish choice, over giving that life up to protect others. In Yuuta’s mind, Yuuji does more harm than good, but that’s only because he hasn’t gotten to know him. Yuuji may have the King of Curses within him but he’s a genuinely caring person who wants to help people. Yuuta only sees the consequences of his actions, albiet quite destructive consequences.

And Megumi and Toge, both the people that they’re fighting for, are, surprise surprise, nowhere to be seen. Yuuta’s probably worried about protecting Inumaki so he doesn’t want him to come along. Yuuji’s ashamed and unwilling to face Megumi so he distances himself. And they’re both fighting on someone else’s behalf, someone they aren’t even really communicating with.

So now we got the whole Mahito vs Yuuji situation two times over. But a strange twist of fate is making Yuuji into a Mahito to be exorcised, despite his visceral hatred of him. Yuuta’s probably going to fall into the same pattern as Yuuji, where he’s forced to confront the humanity and importance of life that he’s wanting to extinguish. 

Yuuji and Yuuta both need to work on their communication with the people around them before continuing in their path, lest they fall into the same pattern as Getou who’s constant stewing made him go insane. All three are well intentioned people who care so deeply but because they decide to take on everyone’s burdens by themselves, they distance themselves more and more from the people they’re trying to protect.

#okkotsu yuta #itadori yuuji #inumaki toge #fushiguro megumi #jujutsu kaisen #jjk meta #jjk #not me writing this instead of working on my capstone

[theokotrain]

Vestige - Chapter 3: Someone Else Will See It For Yourself

Wattpad Version

In the middle of the vortex, the wind picked up

Shook up the soot, from the chimney pot

Into spiral patterns, of you, my love

---

Who said that?

It sounded distant, but I could almost tell it was meant for me. I shut the door as fast as I can manage, locking it behind me. Turning around, I glance further into the cabin.

"Shaela? You here?" I lightly shouted, hoping she would just be in her room or something. No response.

I moved to the backdoor, looking out the window to see if she was waiting in the backyard. The trees and bushes are noticeably rustling from the wind. The door to the generator seemed to be open, but I had absolutely zero interest in checking that out, let alone going outside. I reach for my pocket, aiming to grab my phone so I can call her, only to find out it isn't there.

Shit, right, I left it with Liam.

I open the backdoor a crack, sticking my body half out the door, "Shaela! Where the fuck did you go?"

The eerie silence of the wind is all that returned, leaving me spooked, to say the least. I close the back door, choosing to head back out front. As much as I wanted to hide inside the cabin for the rest of this bullshit, I couldn't just leave Shae and Liam out there. I step outside, closing the front door behind me as softly as I can manage. As the door shuts, I feel an unnerving amount of pressure building up in my ears and softening the sounds around me. I step down the creaky wooden steps, heading back down the driveway.

"I swear to god Shae if this is you just trying to scare me..." I huff, looking through the nearby trees, "...It's fucking working. Now cut the shit!" I know that situation is unlikely, but it's definitely the preferred outcome out of all the scenarios my anxiety-ridden brain is currently playing out.

Maybe she called Liam again and met him at the lake because I was taking too long? I definitely would've heard her on my way up to the cabin if that were true, though. Any reasoning at this point is useless anyway, it's easiest for me to just head back to Liam, then I could at least have my phone and call Shae to see where the hell she went.

The fog seems to be a bit clearer near the highway, which instills at least a minor amount of confidence in me. I cross the asphalt road as fast as I can, trying to hear for any cars that might come barrelling down the limited-visibility highway. I start walking down the trail towards the lake, each step filled with the determination to get the fuck out of this forest, and at least back with Liam. My ears twitch at every minor sound that fills the nearby area, the whistling of the wind, the rustling of the flora, the skittering of the local wildlife. I can't help but feel watched, despite the minimal evidence I have backing up that fear. Well, with the exception of whoever the fuck was talking to me a few minutes ago.

Did I really just skip over that major detail? Someone was talking to me, but I didn't see anybody around. Am I going insane? It could have just been the wind, the voice lacked the substance of someone actually talking. The problem with that, though, is that the wind doesn't typically sound out actual fucking words. Whatever, any of these ideas are just my anxious thought-process trying to make sense of the information it's been taking in.

When I reach the clearing by the lake, I can barely see out into the water. It was typical for it to get foggy by the lake during the spring or fall, because the warming temperatures didn't collide well with the cold air and freezing lake, although rarely to this extent. That doesn't matter now though, the important detail that hadn't registered in my mind yet is that Liam is nowhere to be found. The blanket, along with the rest of the stuff I brought is still lying exactly where I left it. I look around the clearing..

"Liam?" I shouted, hoping he was close by.

Someone has to be fucking with me at this point. Did he go up to the cabin? Maybe he saw the fog and decided to head back? Obviously not, cause I would've at least heard him! I try not to expect the worst, but it feels almost impossible not to at this point.

The jarring sound of my ringtone brings me back to reality. The vibrations of the phone are quieted by the blanket it lays upon. I pick it up, looking to see the Caller ID.

Tyler?

I answer the call, still trying to figure out what's going on, "What is it?" I said, a noticeable irritation in my voice from the situation.

"why did you wake me?" He replied. His voice sounded almost hollow, like a memory.

"Wake you? Dude, you called me? Just tell me what you want cause I'm kindaaa busy right now!" I said hurriedly, trying not to come off as rude.

"i wanted so much to be at rest."

"Wha- then go to back to bed?!? I don't see why you had to call for this, dude. Besides, it's like one in the afternoon? Shouldn't you be working right now?" I remarked, eager for him to get to the point.

There's a long pause between us, I didn't count the time, but it was long enough to be noticeable, and for me to quickly get impatient.

"it's different now, i think"

...

"What is? Just- can you stop speaking like you're reading poetry and say something actually coherent?"

There's an even longer moment of silence, he doesn't seem interested in answering my questions.

I sigh deeply, sitting down on the blanket that was left behind, my face in my palm. "What's different now?" I said bluntly.

"somewhere i lost whatever else i had"

"What, are you writing music now? Testing your lyrics out on me? Very poetic. But this is not the ti-"

"i wasn't over you"

That does a pretty good job of shutting me up. I bury my face further into my palm, trying to escape whatever bullshit I've gotten myself into as the wind picks up around me.

"...Yeah. I know." I admit. I could tell whatever explanations he came up with last night were pretty clearly a façade, but for him to admit it like this? None of it seemed real. "Is that why you called? ...I'm sorry, Tyler. You're a great guy, better than you care to admit. B- but I'm happy now. I hope you can get to that point soon, too."

"there's so much travel yet, jake."

I take a moment to process his words, when I hear the sound of leaves crunching distantly behind me. I jerk my head towards the sound of the noise, hoping to see Shae and Liam coming to find me, to no avail. It feels like there's thousands of eyes on me all at once as I try to ignore my surroundings.

"I- I know." I say, not really wanting to continue my thought process. "You know, some part of me wishes it went differently... back then." I can feel the wind getting stronger as I continue.

"who would you be now?"

"...someone better, probably. At least I'd have things figured out," I sighed. "Everything's been so uncertain lately, I don't know what my life's gonna look like in a few months, let alone when I'm older."

"don't worry, someone else will see it for yourself."

"Wh- what do you mean?"

The wind quickly dies down, and the only sound remaining is the tone coming from the phone, signalling the connection was lost.

What the fuck just happened?

I go back to my phone, dialling Ty's number once again. The phone rings a few times before he finally answers.

"Hey! Whaddya need? You kinda caught me at a bad time, it's pretty busy right now at work." He replied sincerely, his voice noticeably different from moments ago.

"Oh, uh, sorry! Did you just call me?"

"Call you? Uhh, I don't think so? Unless I butt-dialed you or something?"

"Ah, robocaller must've spoofed your number or something." I didn't have any way to rationally explain the previous events without sounding crazy, so I opted to stay casual, repressing the thoughts back to where they came from. "So, you're able to come tonight, right?" I said, trying to shift the topic.

"Yeah I should be able to if they don't make me stay late again! You need me to bring anything over?" He inquired.

"Uhh, I'll get back to you about that in a bit. I am currently at the lake near the cabin and have no clue where Shae and Liam are." I exclaimed in a sarcastically perky voice.

"...What?"

"I- It's probably fine, they're adults, they're probably fine. I'm just paranoid." I said, lightly laughing to lighten the mood.

"Oh, well, let me know if you find 'em! I'll try to keep my phone on me." He assured.

"Yeah, will do!" My eyes widen, and I let out a sigh, "God, I'm just bothering you at this point. I give you permission to go back to work now!" I joked.

"Nah, you're good! I like talking to you." He said, I could almost hear the smile in his voice.

I laughed a tired laugh, "Yeah. You too." A moment passed as neither of us spoke up, "Well, I should probably at least try calling them."

"You haven't tried calling them yet??? Remind me to never let you lead the search party if I go missing," He joked.

"Yeah, like I'd even be considered for leading any search party," I remarked sarcastically. The both of us laughed. "I'll let you know if we need anything, I should get going." "Sounds good!"

We said our goodbyes and I hung up, my mind returning to focus on the lake. I gathered the blanket and anything else Liam left behind and started walking back up the trail. The wind had reduced to subtlety at this point, but the fog was still in full force. I said to Ty that I would call them, but I needed a few more minutes of uncertainty. Any of the fears that occupied my mind earlier were long dissipated as I thought over some problematic dilemmas.

If Ty didn't call me, then who was I talking to?

It sounded just like him, minus the usual substance of his low-toned voice. And unless he was lying to me when he said he didn't call me the first time, then maybe I'm just losing whatever remnants of sanity that I had before today.

Honestly, what's even the point of me rationalizing this? What would I even tell people? That I heard a voice talking to me, but no one was there? That Liam and Shae essentially vanished off the face of the Earth? That I got a phone call by the water from my ex, speaking incoherent poetry, admitting that he wasn't over me?

I cross the highway.

Yeah, there's no combination of words in any language that I could piece together to explain that without losing the respect of everyone around me. I'm sure I could at least get an explanation from Liam and Shae about wherever they ran off to.

I step up the stairs onto the front patio of the cabin.

Whatever, this is just some anomalous twenty minutes of my life that I'll probably forget in a week or two. The simplest solution is to just move on, there's a lot of time left on this trip for me to not have to deal with shit.

I try the door knob, finding it unlocked. The door creaks as I open it, peering inside.

"Fucking hell, where were you?!?"

#Vestige #Story #Novel #Chapter #Three #3 #chapter #novella #furry #gay #lgbt #mystery #coming of age #wattpad #fiction

[wittystarkk]

The Last Five Years | Part Three | Bucky Barnes

author: wittystarkk

word count: 2.5k

relationship: James “Bucky” Barnes/Reader

warnings: kinda sad?

A/N: This is one of the sadder chapters of the fic, but I like it nonetheless. I think it really shows how the two of them are doing. Or, at least, how one side of the relationship is doing. Please, enjoy! Feedback is greatly appreciated! (ignore the gif - i couldn’t find anything that worked but he looks pretty so)

Previous Chapter - Next Chapter

The lake was peaceful and serene, nothing bothering or disturbing it. The air around the lake was just as calm, no wind rattling the trees and no leaves being ruffled. (Y/N) tugged at the three-quarters sleeve of her ugly sweater, wishing she’d worn something different. Wishing that she looked prettier for his potential arrival, that she wore something that was cute and revealing and would keep his interest on her for more than perhaps a minute. She decided it ultimately didn’t matter, that he’d never show up anyway. And even if he did, she wouldn’t have any of his real attention.

She heard footsteps on the wood of the pier and turned her head to look at the person who had approached her. She widened her eyes a little in shock, looking Bucky over anxiously. He gave her a soft smile that didn’t reach his eyes and she subconsciously moved a little further away from him, scooting on the uncomfortable bench. He continued his path down the pier, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jeans. She acknowledged how nice he looked in his fitted black button down and dark wash jeans. She wondered who else had gotten to enjoy his appearance, and quickly shook her head to dismiss the thought. What matters now is that he’s here with you, she reminded herself. 

Bucky removed his hands from his pockets and sat down with her on the bench, leaning over to give her a soft kiss on the cheek. She sighed at his actions, fingers knitting together in her lap. “What’s wrong?” 

She shrugged her shoulders, “nothing. Nothing at all. I just - can’t believe you came. I figured you’d have blown me off. ” She picked at the end of her sweater anxiously. She wished absently that she hadn’t said that to him, hadn’t given him an early reason to be upset with her. 

Bucky took a deep breath, “I told you that I’d come, (Y/N).”

She licked her lips, “I know. I know. It just didn’t feel like you would, you know? But. I’m smiling, see?” she gave him a toothy grin, forcing her face to look joyful. “That means I’m happy that you’re here.” 

He turned his body on the bench to be able to better look at her, though she remained facing forward, away from him. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his leg. The two sat in silence for a moment, Bucky looking down at his hands in his lap and (Y/N) looking out at the water. Neither knew what to say or what to do. How to feel or how to fix anything. There was a tension between the two of them that was damn near tangible. He was beginning to regret coming to Ohio already. 

She cleared her throat, desperate for something to talk about. Something to fill the silence between them so that her thoughts wouldn’t consume her. “I stole this sweater from the costume department here. The kids hated it, I thought it was cute. Right?”

Bucky chuckled, leaning back just a bit to be able to see the sweater. The black material it was made out of looked itchy, and the floral pattern that had been stitched in to cup the breasts was all but flattering. “Not really,” he said honestly, chuckling to convey a sense of levity. He didn’t want her to feel insulted. She found herself giving him a genuine smile this time, one brought on by his chuckle. Any type of laugh of his still remained her favorite sound. 

“Yeah, I guess it does sort of make me look like Daisy Mae, huh?” 

The two laughed together at her comparison, Bucky reaching out to pull at the hem of the sweater investigatively. His suspicions about the itchiness of the fabric being proved correct. (Y/N) playfully swatted his hand away, smoothing out her sweater. “See, we’re laughing,” she pointed out, turning her head to look at him. “I think we’re gonna be okay,” she added on as more of a whisper to herself than a confession to him. She didn’t think anything, not really, but oh how she hoped. 

Bucky gave her a nod, smiling a little, showing off his perfect teeth and his expression looked softer than when he’d arrived. (Y/N) hoped in some small part of her brain that what she had said was true. That they /would/ be better, after all. “I mean,” she continued. “We’ll have to try a little harder. Bend a little, work on compromising and not fighting about everything. But, I think we can do it. I mean, look! You actually made it to Ohio for me. Who knows where else we can go? Maybe we can take a trip, like we used to do? Get into the car and drive for a while. Yeah?”

Bucky’s smile spread wider, and he gave her another nod. “I’d like that,” he acknowledged, reaching out to take her hand in his. She felt comforted, something that hadn’t happened in more months than she could count. She gave his hand a squeeze and let him rest his chin on her shoulder. She missed when he was affectionate with her, when he would show her he cared rather than just mumble that he loved her. 

“I really think you’re gonna like this show I’ve been working on with the campers,” she said with hope in her voice. “I’m pretty sure it doesn’t suck. It’s been nice to be able to write something and watch it come to life. I never was particularly fond of writing plays, but. This ones not too bad, really. The kids seem to like it alright. Well. They like it as much as a group of kids likes anything they’re being forced to do.” 

He laughed at the thought of her trying to rangle young campers together to perform a play she’d written, and she couldn’t help but laugh with him. His laugh was infectious. “See, you’re laughing again. You’re here, and you’re mine, and we’re happy… We’re doing fine.” She said, reassuring herself more than telling him. He was the one to give her hand a squeeze this time, bringing it up to kiss the back of it in the affectionate way he’d used to do. She felt her heart swell a little bit. 

“If you say so,” he finally said, letting their hands lower to rest against her thigh. His chin returned to her shoulder and his nose nuzzled her cheek. She smiled contentedly at the action, inhaling deeply through her nose. 

“I do.. And look. I think we can both see what could be better about us. What we could do to make things work better. I’ll own up to it when I’m wrong about something, which I know you’ve been wanting me to do. And… Fuck, with everything we’ve had to go through together, I’m sure we’ll end up twice as strong as we once were. We could start again this weekend. Begin rebuilding what we’ve lost of us. We’ll just slowly pick the pieces back up. I’m under no delusions that it’s going to be easy. Or that it’s not going to take work. But I’m willing. For us.” 

Bucky kissed her cheek softly and she waited impatiently for him to speak. For him to agree and tell her that it would be fine, after all. For him to tell her he’d put in an effort with her. That he appreciated the strides she was willing to make, and that he’d meet her half way and do the same. When nothing was said after what felt like an hour, (Y/N)’s heart sank again. Her metaphorical balloon deflating more rapidly than it had inflated. She shook his hand off of hers like he’d just broken the bones of it, standing from the bench to walk to the edge of the pier where she could be closer to the water. She wanted desperately just to jump in and swim away. 

“Listen, baby, c’mere.” Bucky called to her, standing up from the bench. He closed the distance between them, holding his hand out to her to take. She turned and sighed, taking his hand. “C’mere,” he repeated, pulling her to him. “I have to head back this weekend, I can’t stay. I’ve got press that I’ve got to do…”

(Y/N)’s face fell, “oh.” She whispered, licking her lips to give herself a quick second to process what he’d just said. “I didn’t know you had to go so soon. I thought you said you were going to be here. I assumed we had time…” 

“I know, baby. I’m sorry, it’s the stupid company wanting to get more steam behind the movie. I wish I could get out of it.” Bucky sounded sincere and (Y/N) almost regretted feeling heartbroken. Surely he was just as upset about having to go as she was.

“Look, whatever. If you have to, then you have to. It’s alright,” she smiled reassuringly up at him, smoothing his hair back a little. “We’ll have tonight.”

Bucky shook his head, frowning as he did so. He dropped her hands and bit his lip to give himself a chance to gather his words and ignore the hurt that was evident in her eyes. “Actually,” he began. “We won’t babe. I’m so sorry. The only flight out of here back to New York is tonight. I’m leaving in an hour or so, I only came to see you for a second.” 

(Y/N) clenched her jaw, stepping back and away from him to rest her hands on her hips. “You know what makes me crazy? I’m sorry, but, can I say this?” She walked around him, heading for the end of the pier. “You know what makes me nuts? The fact that we could be together here,” she gestured around herself. “I know you hate being around me right now, for whatever insane reason you came up with this week, but. We could be together, here and tonight. We could be sharing our time and working on this pitiful excuse for a marriage. But instead you are choosing someone else to be with, like always. ”

Bucky glared at her, “that’s not true! I’m not choosing someone else to be with, (Y/N).”

“No, you are,” she argued. 

He groaned, “I’m not! I have to go to this for work. I’m not picking someone else.”

(Y/N) scoffed, “yes, Bucky, that’s exactly what you’re doing! Here, let me lay this out for you. You’ve got your two options; you could be here with me, or be there with them. As usual, guess which you pick?” 

Bucky flared his nostrils a bit, moving his jaw a little in frustration. “I told you, (Y/N)! I’m not picking them. I have to go to this!”

“No, Bucky. You do not have to go to another stupid press thing, if that’s even what this is, where you’ll be seeing the same twenty jerks you already know! You could stay with your wife on her fucking birthday. Do you know how horrible this makes me feel, Bucky? Leaving me on -” She shook her head, taking a deep breath. “And you know, you could /God forbid/, even see this show I’ve been working on. Like I have to see every stupid movie you do. You know, because I actually give a shit about you. And I know how much it must be driving you crazy that you’re not home with your girlfriend. But, you could at least still pretend to care for my sake.”

Bucky’s face instantly showed his anger and annoyance, “(Y/N) you’re crazy!”

She shook her head, anger showing in her eyes, heartbreak showing in the way she shook her hand in front of herself. “No, I’m not. No I’m not! You know that, and you’re only calling me crazy to - to take the conversation off of yourself. But the point is, Bucky, that you can’t spend a single day that’s not about you! Not even /my/ birthday. Everything has to be about /you/, and you, and /nothing/ but you! The marvelous movie star, /you/. Oh, God. Isn’t he wonderful? The break we’ve been looking for! It’s literally always /you/ and /you/ and nothing but /you/. Miles and piles of /you/! Jesus Christ, you’re the only person in this marriage. It’s just you and your fucking ego. You and your affairs. You and /you/. I can’t -” (Y/N) stopped talking, tears brimming her eyes.  

Bucky rest his hands on his hips, his posture defensive. (Y/N) could nearly feel the anger rolling off of him, he always did hate when the two of them fought. Especially when he was the problem. It was easier for him when he could blame everything on her, when he could tell her that she was the one that’d fucked everything up for them. That she was the reason they were fighting and they were falling apart. If he kept her thinking she was the problem, it made it easier to hide from the truth. It was so easy to point the finger of blame, but would never let it land on himself. 

(Y/N) bit her tongue softly between her teeth, watching him carefully with narrowed eyes, tears slowly rolling down her cheeks. She couldn’t stand the sight of him. The sight of someone she once would have given anything for, who now wouldn’t even give her the time of day. She wished she didn’t love him. Wished that she didn’t have his stupid ring feeling heavy on her finger. Wished she would have never met him five years ago and been hooked on him. She waited with a heavy heart for him to say something. For him to apologize and pull her into a hug. To kiss her on the top of the head and tell her that he loved her. That it was going to be okay. That they were going to be okay. That he could miss this stupid party and stay with her. That they could be them for once. The Bucky and (Y/N) that were in love, not the Bucky and (Y/N) who barely knew each other any more. Her stomach did a lurch, unconsciously biting down harder on her tongue. She suppressed a wince, looking down at her feet, clearing her throat. 

When she looked back up at him her throat tightened uncomfortably. “I swear to God, I’ll never understand how you can stand there, straight and tall… And see that I’m crying, and not do anything at all.” She rest her hands on her waist, her fingers digging into her skin to keep her from sobbing. To keep her from breaking down and apologizing. To keep her from appeasing him and salvaging the rest of her time with him. 

Bucky rubbed his fingers against his lips, looking away from her out to the lake. He wanted to be swallowed by the water. Watching (Y/N) cry was more than he could bear but he’d be absolutely damned before he did anything to stop it. She had freaked out on him, accused him of having an affair. Accused him of being full of himself. He wouldn’t dare try comforting her now. She wouldn’t have even allowed it, he was sure. She’d yell at him, push him away like she always did. 

Bucky took in a deep breath, slowly shaking his head. “(Y/N), I’ve got to go.” 

“Whatever,” she snapped. “Go then. Tell your girlfriend I said hi.”

~

If you’d like to be tagged, let me know!

Tags:

@petlaufeyson​, @lovely-geek​

#sam writes #sams post #sam posts #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fan fic #bucky barnes fiction #bucky barnes fan fiction #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes imagines #sebastian stan one shot #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fanfic #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan fan fic

[headoverjojo]

Is it possible to get a comfort sex scenario with risotto and afab reader? ;0;Thank you!!!!

Eyo!~ Here we go, my dear!

Comfort love with Risotto

(Under the cut for NSFW!)

It had been a hard day. A long, tiring day.

You had just returned home from a mission. Nothing new, since you were an assassin and death was your job, but today it had been… different.

Among the targets, you had to also kill a friend from your past life. A dear one, even. Risotto didn’t know it, of course, or he wouldn’t ever have sent you.

You still were seeing his eyes, the light when he had recognized you, the horror when he saw what you had done to his coworkers, the hope that maybe you would have spared his life, in honor of your old friendship. The utter disbelief and terror when he had realized that you were going to kill him anyway.

Because you were an assassin of the infamous Squadra di Esecuzione. Death was your work, when you thought about killing someone, you were already moving to do it. Prosciutto had always been clear about it, when he was training you, when you joined.

You were an assassin; then why was it hurting so much? What was so special this time?

Maybe the thought of having a normal life was hunting you. A sort of “what if” awaken by your friend’s murder. But…

If you never have entered Passione and then the hitmen team, you wouldn’t have ever met Risotto.

He was your rock, your supporter, as much as you were so for him. And now you really needed him.

You entered home, silent. Lifting your gaze, you saw a faint gleam spreading from the kitchen. He was still up, of course… when you were away, he couldn’t sleep, so he kept himself busy with paperworks, to fight the slight anxiety that always clenched his guts.

He had heard you, of course, and after a little his figure appeared near you. Without a word, you leaned onto his chest, burying your face in it. You felt him sigh and his arms gently wrapped your shoulders, rubbing them in a reassuring way, leaving you a bit of time to just breath.

Listening to his calm heartbeat, you finally felt again well anchored to your world. He always managed to calm you down so easily… but, even if now you felt better, it wasn’t enough. You stretched your arms around his neck and he, catching the message, lifted you like you didn’t weigh more than a feather. You nuzzled your face in the crock of his neck, tightly hugging him, while he carried you to the bedroom.

He sat on the bed, keeping you close to him, and simply stayed here, with you on his lap, gently rubbing your shoulders and caressing your hair, keeping you safe in his arms.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” he murmured. You opened one eye, feeling the reverb of his strong and low voice under your cheek, still smashed between his shoulder and neck.

“I had to kill a friend from my previous life.” you murmured, finally. He froze for few seconds, before slowly starting again to caress your hair.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have to send you-” you blocked his words with a kiss, bringing him down by his hat’s bells.

“It’s ok, tesoro. You didn’t know and neither I did. It’s our job.” you replied, staring into his intense red eyes and caressing his cheek. It was true and, even if they had known it, you would have gone anyway. You were a professionist.

“I… I just don’t want to think anymore about it. It’s gone, he is gone.” you continued, biting your lip. He sighed, putting his thumb between your teeth and lip, knowing how much you always bit ‘till draw blood.

“Still, you seem really troubled.” he replied, trying to let you vent, even if without pushing you. He knew that with such a weight on your chest you couldn’t have go on for long; in a life like yours, a clear mind was fundamental to survive. You couldn’t have it dazed by some weird thoughts.

“It’s… it’s just that for a moment I thought about how would have been to have a normal life. You know, finish school, a normal job…” you murmured, while his eyes saddened a little. You were too precious for a life in the shadows…

“But in that case I wouldn’t have had you.” you continued, startling him. It was unexpected, as the next kiss you gave him, deep, intense, sinking your fingers in the short white hair on his nape.

“And then my life would have been so grey and empty. A life without you would have been so sad.” you stared in his eyes, sure about your words. Risotto’s eyes grew softer, after your utterly sincere declaration, and he bent his head down to kiss you again, slowly, a deep and languid kiss that made your toes curl and the knot in your guts grow more and more heated.

The thought of a life without him was kinda terrifying, right now. He was the one who helped you not to go insane in a life so dark and merciless. After what happened that day, well… you needed to feel him. To feel that it was all real and that he was so. That it wasn’t all a too vivid dream.

And so you sat better on his lap, unclasping the dark leather braces on his chest, letting them fall over along his long coat, giving him a kiss after another, almost always breathless. He let you do as you wanted, caressing your hips, your back, sliding his warm hands under your shirt to better enjoy the smooth texture of your skin.

He growled, when you started to lightly bite him on his jaw, just to go down to his neck, covering it with attentions and soft care. His hands settled on your hips, toying with the hem of your trousers, making you whine a bit, sinking your teeth in his skin and tearing a delicious hiss from him.

“Do you think it’s a good idea?” he murmured, while caressing anyway your stomach, making you shiver. You nodded, taking off his hat and kissing him again, caressing his cheeks. So stern and lethal but so caring with the people he loved… a really hidden side that you madly loved.

“I’m sure.” you whispered, helping him to take off your lower clothes and popping open his trousers. You smiled on his lips, when you freed his erection, gripping on his shoulders. You stroked yourself on him, gritting your teeth in anticipation and, finally, slowly sank on him, guided and helped by his hands on your hips. His mouth gently muffled your moan, his fingers sank in the soft flesh of your hips, while you were adjusting on him. You always needed a moment to get used to the intrusion, but he was patient. He was always patient.

Slowly, you started to move, using his shoulders as support, sinking your fingers in his white locks, while his hands gently, but firmly, guided your movements. Even when he was being topped, he was the one in charge: he was the one leading the kiss, he was the one giving the rhythm to your movements.

You felt him everywhere, every sense was dominated by him: his scent of leather and iron filled your nostrils; the soft, smooth texture of his hair enveloped your hands; his mouth, which always tasted a bit of blood, had overcome yours; your eyes were trapped in his ruby red irises, that almost seemed to shine in the penumbra; and his soft grunts echoed in your ears. He was all in you as much as you were all in him; this was how it always was between you. You always gave everything to the other, ‘till the last drop. Maybe it was a sort of defence sistem: if death would have caught one of you during a mission, you would have left the world as an empty vessel, since you had had poured all of you in the other. You would have lived on in the other.

But, right now, you didn’t want to think about such things; you just wanted to focus on his mouth on your neck, how he so deliciously stretched you rhythmically, how his hands were digging so much in your flesh to surely leave bruises, but oh, you didn’t care even a bit.

Soon, your movements started to become erratic. You trembled, while bouncing on his lap, his hands matching your faster rhythm as his own breath became more husky. He was near too, you knew, you knew so well his signs, from how his teeth sank deeper in your skin, to muffle his moans, to his hands that almost lifted all your weight to let you royally ride your pleasure.

And you did so, arching your back and roughly tugging his hair, making him grunt, while his hands merciless continued to guide you up and down, prolonging your bliss and, finally, allowing him to meet his own release. He sank his face in the crock of your neck, heavily breathing, rhythmically squeezing the back of your thighs as he released in you, and then, finally, he slowly released you, leaving angry red marks where his hands have sunk too much.

Not that you complained, not when you were laying and nestling on his chest, deeply breathing while you slowly came down from the bliss. His arms encircled you and you nuzzled more comfortably in his embrace, basking in his warmth and in the deep sense of safety you always felt in his arms. Nothing bad could happen until you were safe and sound in his hug.

“Thank you, tesoro.” you murmured, gently kissing his collarbone. He allowed himself to smile a little, affectionately kissing your forehead and hugging you even tighter.

“Don’t even say.” he replied, quiet, making you smile again. You closed your eyes relaxing more in his embrace, deeply breathing, feeling the weight on your chest lessening minute after minute.

When you fell asleep, you did with his scent in your nostrils and his soft lips on your forehead. A faint smile graced your lips, as you drifted into sleep, with the awareness and the assurance that you were really here, that your Risotto was real, safe and alive with you. You fell asleep safe and sound in the arms of the man you loved, in the life you chose and that you would have never changed for anything else.

#jjba #vento aureo #la squadra di esecuzione #risotto nero #fem s/o #comforting topic #comfort love #senario #sin writings #anon ask

[riseandfxll]

Retribution, Chapter Four

Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three

Summary - Hailey gets shot while off-duty in a seemingly random attack, but what the intelligence unit uncovers while she’s in the hospital fighting for her life will change everything.

[i had a sudden surge of creativity during class today, so enjoy!]

[Also posted on my ff.net & Ao3]

The surgeons had kept their word, 30 minutes after they had come to update Hailey’s friends and colleagues, Dr. Rhodes had returned, this time with a smile tugging at his lips.

“She’s waking up, and she’s asking for you, Detective Halstead.” Dr. Rhodes informed the group, paying specific attention to Jay.

Jay jumped onto his feet, “Me? Okay… yeah,” he stuttered, obviously shocked that Hailey had asked for him specifically.

Before he let himself rush into the hall, he turned to face his boss, seemingly in search of permission to go.

“Go on, kid.” Voight told him, giving him a nod in the direction of the door.

That was all Jay needed to hear. He was out of the waiting room and into the corridor leading to the ICU where Hailey had been placed after surgery.

Jay’s heart moved into his throat as he walked through the never-ending stark white hall, the smell of disinfectant clinging to his nose. He didn’t know how his brother could work here day in, day out. Jay would go insane if he had to spend an extended period of time in this place. He hated hospitals. They had been linked to pain for as long as he could remember. The first time he had spent any significant time in one was years ago, when mother was dying, and since then, he had avoided them at any cost.  

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of walking, the doctor stopped outside a private room, “she’s just in here,” Dr. Rhodes informed him, his voice pulling Jay out of the hole he had started digging.

Jay stopped; his feet planted to the linoleum. “Um, yeah, thank you,” Jay replied, tripping over his words.

Dr. Rhodes placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, “Dr. Bekker is in with her, she’s just finishing up a basic post-surgery assessment, but she’ll be out of your way in no time.” Connor told him.

Jay nodded, trying to pull himself together before Hailey could see what a mess he had become, “Thank you, Doctor Rhodes.” Jay said, his voice sincere. If it wasn’t for the two doctors, Hailey wouldn’t be here. And for that, he could never thank them enough.

Connor nodded in response, giving Jay’s shoulder an encouraging squeeze before turning and walking away.

The young detective inhaled, filling his lungs up with the sterilized hospital air before turned to face the door. He let his arm extend in front of him, the cold metal of the doorknob biting into his palm as he turned it.

He let the door swing open, “Hailey,” he whispered, letting out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding.

The blonde lay in a hospital bed, wires connecting her to machines that filled the small room, beeping at a steady pace. “Hey,” she greeted him, her voice groggy with sleep. She looked so small, so helpless lying there.

He could tell she was trying to hide the pain and exhaustion, but he could see it in her eyes. Their usual vibrant blue had faded into a sunken grey.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, mentally scolding himself for such a dumb question.

“Eh, kinda like I got shot,” she chuckled, motioning to the bandages visible under her generic hospital gown.

Feeling as though she was interrupting a moment, Ava finished up her last reports and slipped out of room, telling herself she’d come back later to do a more thorough examination, however, from what she could tell, everything had looked good.

“Good to see you’re sense of humour’s back,” He said, laughing softly at her response.

“You know, you can come closer. I’m not going to break,” she told him, pointing out the fact that he was still standing at the opposite side of the room.

He let out a laugh, “Typical. You get shot and the first thing you do when you get out of surgery is give me shit,” he joked, trying to hide his relief.

As he started walking closer to the hospital bed in the middle of the room, she gave him a confused look. “What’s wrong, Jay?” she asked him, worry evident in her voice.

He obviously hadn’t hidden his emotions well enough, he thought as he took a seat next to her feet at the edge of the bed. “I thought… Hailey I thought you were dead.” He told her, his voice shaking as his spoke. “When you hit the concrete, I had no idea if you were ever going to get back up again…” Jay continued, his voice cracking as he tried to fight the emotions that threatened to boil over.

“Jay. Jay look at me,” her voice was gentle as she spoke. “I’m okay. I’m alive. Here,” she continued, motioning for him to come closer before holding her hand out towards him for him to take. “See, I’m real. This is real. I’m not going anywhere.” She comforted him, squeezing his hand to show him that she was, in fact, here, and that this was real.

He gripped her hand and leant towards her, bringing his head towards her stomach, careful not to hurt her injured shoulder. He sat there, holding her like he was never going to let go. Not again. Not after he had come so close to losing it once. “If the bullet had been three inches to the left… I… I don’t know what I would do without you…” he stammered, lifting his head to look at her before moving up the bed to embrace her, still careful of her incision.

“It wasn’t,” Hailey could feel the tears behind her eyes, threatening to fall as she spoke. She knew how deeply Jay felt for the people he loved. He had lost so many of his friends already, either while fighting in Afghanistan or in the warzone that Chicago was turning into. She had seen him break; hell, she was the one that had been there, ready to put him back together again. “So, you don’t have to think about that, Jay. I’m here,” she comforted him, knowing that she would be doing the same thing as he was if the roles were reversed, and he was the one lying in the bed.

“Look at me, Jay,” she instructed him, lifting his chin to face her. “I’m okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

He searched her eyes as she spoke, getting lost in the faded blue abyss. He should be the one comforting her, not the other way around. She got shot.

“I’m sorry, I…” He stammered, sitting up more.

“Stop. Don’t apologise.” She interrupted, wincing as she pushed herself up by her elbows before his hand on her arm stopped her.

He kept his hand gently on her bicep, just in case she needed him, “I need to apologise. It’s my job to have your back and look what happened. I’m supposed to keep you safe, if I can’t even do that then…” he was tripping over his words like a teenager trying to tell a girl he likes her.

The injured detective pushed herself to sit upright, gently cupping her partners face, “Jay, no one could have seen this coming, not even Voight and I’m pretty sure he’s some sort of psychic,” She joked, trying to lighten the mood, “We were off shift, our guards were down. That’s no one’s fault except the bastard who did this,” she indicated to the newly-stitched wound. “But we’re going to find him, and we’re going to deal with him. Voight will make sure of that.”

Jay could see the determination peaking out behind the fear and pain in her eyes, “You’re family, Hailey, we take care of family.”

#Chicago PD #jay halstead #hailey upton #upstead #fanfiction #One Chicago #Chicago Fire #chicago med #hank voight #connor rhodes #ava bekker #writing&fanfiction #character #whump #angst

[glorybcrn]

hihi everybody !! i’m kelly ( eighteen , she/her , mst ) and uh h ... i haven’t been in the roleplaying game for a hot minute but i’m really excited to be here n get back into it ! this is my garbage son gabriel who is technically an old muse ?? ngl i’ve dragged this poor binch to hell n back so if this intro kinda funky ... that why ....... also i may or may not be running on 3 hrs of sleep jfifjnck

◟ * ◊ ─ jason bateman + cismale + he/him » * believe it or not gabriel dombrova is working for the lothario family. they are forty seven years of age and are known to usually spend their time around city hall. the mayor, who has been a part of the alliance for sixteen years, has been living in victoria for forty seven years. the people closest to them describe the bisexual + capricorn to be driven and astute as well as reserved and unforgiving » 

background

— born and raised in victoria, despite not being a founding family, gabriel’s family still had relatively deep roots within the city; it was said that his great grandfather had moved here from massachusetts looking for the american dream. the patriarchal dombrova came from humble beginnings, building the family business ( a local inn ) from the ground up and over the decades it only got bigger and bigger until it had turned into the respectable hotel that it is known as today and now has multiple locations across the state of florida. naturally, his father inherited this business and his mother, on the other hand, is your typical southern belle, moved here from a small town in texas. she was a corporate lawyer ( it’s how she met gabriel’s father ) but since becoming a mother she really has had no interests in any other occupation other than trophy wife and socialite.

— to say that gabriel’s parents were old school would be putting it lightly. basically, both of his parents were deeply religious republicans and were very aware of their image as a family. they were harsh parents, extremely controlling when it came to their children’s lives but at the same time were also really emotionally absent. to this day they still believe that it was all in the name of tough love but obviously it was just emotional abuse. his father was especially hard on gabriel, he was a strong believer in physical discipline and thought gabriel to be too “soft”. he was always berating him, punishing him for petty offences, and pretty much just fostering your typical environment of toxic masculinity. though he never laid a hand on gabriel’s sister as she was what he called, “a lady” and his “pride and joy.”

— but gabriel was a good kid, he was obedient aside from stupid mistakes that kids are bound to make. he was your typical golden boy, a jack of all trades of sorts. not exceptionally good at one thing, but averagely good at a multitude of things. he was a quick learner and dedicated, anything he took a crack at, he eventually excelled in. throughout high school, he mostly kept to himself, choosing to focus on his education and after graduating valedictorian, he went to harvard where he earned his business degree. the plan was to come back to victoria, work for his father, and make his way up until he was ready to inherit the business himself.

— but while away at university, he met abigail. it was your typical whirlwind of a first love where it felt like it was just the two of you against the world. with her, gabriel experienced a sense of normalcy and sincere, unconditional love. for someone who severely lacked both up until then, maybe it wasn’t so crazy that the two decided to marry as soon as they graduated. together, they moved back to victoria to start their lives. to an outsider, gabriel’s life had seemingly always been perfect, envy-worthy. with a renowned and respected family, a successful business, the perfect wife, and now, a baby on the way too, it’s no wonder he’d been chosen by the lothario’s to be their candidate as mayor.

— his connection with the alliance started out small; the hotel business had been in a rough spot for a couple of years and out of nowhere, they seemed to have just come in at the right time, saving the day. he could be on their payroll all for the price of a few, teensy favours. favours such as his hotel being used as refuge for some of their men, a place of business when needed, and gabriel refusing to be a failure, especially in his father’s eyes, easily succumbed to their offer. 

— of course, gabriel’s family has no idea about the real root of his sudden interest in politics, much less how the family business has managed to be so successful still despite his now even busier schedule. and as a result, his relationship with his wife and children have deteriorated over the years. it began as a defense mechanism, intentionally distancing himself from his loved ones as a way to protect them. and while his children maybe the one last soft spot gabriel has left, his sudden absence as a father has definitely put a strain on his relationship with them. however his relationship with his wife seemed to suffer even more, things between the two of them are definitely not how they once used to be. they’re cold to one another and see each other more so as strangers rather than husband and wife. unfortunately, a divorce doesn’t exactly fit into the white picket-fence image gabriel had so carefully curated over the years. 

personality

— after decades of playing different facades, gabriel’s definitely lost a sense of his true self, or maybe it’s just fully gone. he used to be this really compassionate and benevolent person who always prioritized family over anything. it’s why ( at least this is what he tells himself ) he initially risked getting into business with the alliance in the first place, but now, he really only pretends to be those things to get the people to like him. he can be incredibly charming when he wants to be but it’s all just so .. hollow ? if that makes sense. like, nowadays there’s rarely an ounce of honesty or sincerity in him. he’s just so consumed with being a part of the alliance, it’s all he really knows at this point.

— extremely driven and cunning, if there’s something gabriel wants, he’ll get it. even as a child, he was an over achiever and so he’s known to always come through when it’s requested of him. he’s not exactly evil .. ? but he is loyal to the lotharios. i think there’s a small part of him that hates them, hates himself, and hates what he’s doing but idk he kinda just tells that it to shut up lmao. having had to learn it as a child, he’s very good at compartmentalizing which is probably why he can play all these different roles so well without going insane dnkjds

— really reserved, tries ( and succeeds ) to put out this strait-laced and conservative image. has the ability to remain calm in any sort of situation and twist things to his advantage. like honestly ?? gabriel is probably a pr manager’s wet dream .. he just comes across as this very charming and kind man, he’s the type of politician that’ll say hi to your baby and sign its head idk

but ugh idk it’s hard to explain gabriel’s personality since he’s such an emotional mess, i would just end up rambling about the same thing over and over again if i tried to keep going so i’m gonna .. stop right now.

connections

— personal assistant ?? someone incredibly organized and competent. this plot can range from really basic like .. yeah book my doctor’s appointment thnx to someone he’s actually pretty close to ? maybe he doesn’t even realize it, idk. like we can literally do wtvr w this, so !

— other members of the alliance, could be just someone he’s acquainted with or knows well and works pretty close with.

— if you have any muses involved with politics or managing ? his campaign manager or just anyone who worked on his campaign. like w the personal assistant we can .. go basic or brazy w this.

— love interests ? doesn’t have to be ~romantic~ per se .. but idk like affairs ig ?? cause .. gabe’s not perfect, rip. but he is careful so it wldn’t be like .. smth messy or if it was he’d prob make certain measurements after. idk what that means exactly dnjsnsdjk just tryna not get caught uk … or even something as small as flirtationships !

ok these all suck bc gabe is….. emotionally dead inside cnjdsnksnjd but ! obv tht can change per circumstance n whatever so pls .. feel free to mssg me whenever if u have any ideas !!

#victoireintro #im.... so dead but imma go get smth to eat rl quick #if u wanna plot w this ugly just like this n ill mssg u as soon as i can !! #or feel free to mssg me if u have any ideas :^)) #i will warn u that i am... very slow so i apologize in advance .. #abuse tw #/ ooc tag tba .

[jesbakescookies]

Too Hot To Handle: Chapter Forty-Eight

So I kinda wrote a different kind of fanfiction. It’s nothing as in depth as my other fics so I am going to post it here. ENJOY!!***Actor, Real Person Fanfiction, Walking Dead RPF***Featuring: Jeffrey Dean Morgan X Original Female Character, Norman Reedus and others.. (FYI this is total fiction, as in I know nothing about JDMs life or that of his real SO and son etc. Because of this, for this work of fiction, they don’t exist. Jeffrey’s been a typical actor playboy dating fellow stars etc. This is written for sick daydreaming pleasure.)

Aria St. James is a busy woman with a thriving restaurant. She thought she had everything she needed until a few famous faces visit her dining room. A tall, dark and handsome actor decides Aria’s just what he’s been looking for.

Rating: Mature : NSFW **dirty dirty**

Find Too Hot To Handle Master Chapter List Here

Jeffrey sat with a few costars from the show, as the interviewer posed a few questions for the group. Leaning towards Norman, he whispered. "We got to see the lil’ shit yesterday." "Oh yeah?" He rasped back, a smirk curling his lip.  "Fucking insane." Jeffrey muttered. "I fucking bet. When do you know what it is?" "Not for a while. Probably a couple appointments." "That's awesome." Norman grinned, as the questions were directed towards them. 

"Jeffrey, you have the show and many other film projects. Plus all the conventions you hit, how do you balance everything?" The interviewer asked after speaking to the others about their latest projects. "Well, it's definitely hard. I travel a lot between filming locations and home. I probably spend more time on planes and in hotels than in my own bed." "That's got to be hard for the wife. You're still newlyweds right?" Laughing a bit at that, Norman chimed in, "They sure fucking act like it." Elbowing him in the side, Jeffrey rolled his eyes and drawled, "It's definitely difficult with her work schedule and mine but we make it work. Especially now with all the doctor appointments...."

As soon as the words left his mouth, Jeffrey knew he'd fucked up royally. He could literally see the gears turning in the interviewers mind as they figured out what he'd just revealed. 

Norman belted out a laugh as Jeffrey's head dropped into his hands. "Are we getting an exclusive reveal?" The interviewer asked, leaning forward on the edge of her seat. "Damnit." Jeffrey muttered directly to the camera."I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm such a jackass." "So you're gonna be a dad? Is that what you mean? Is Negan a daddy?"

His fellow cast members all laughed and congratulated him on the news but he could only think of Aria’s reaction. They weren't going to tell anyone until she was further into the pregnancy. She had a fear that if they announced it, something terrible would happen. They also feared what kind of paparazzi presence would happen with them expecting, Jeffrey didn't want Aria hounded for pictures. All that planning was thrown out the window by Jeffrey loose lips.  

"Shit." He growled before nodding and giving them a nervous smile. "Yeah, yeah we are." "Congratulations. That's amazing. How excited are you?" "I'm more than stoked to have a kid. Especially with my amazing and extremely beautiful, forgiving wife." Jeffrey added, trying to butter up the woman who would probably be removing his tongue when she saw him next. They all laughed at his words and contrite expression.

 "Sounds like you're feeling guilty. 

"He's sucking up. Ari’s going to kick his ass." Norman joked. "More than." Jeffrey muttered before speaking towards the camera again. "Baby, I'm sorry seriously... I'm a jackass. You know I'm terrible at shutting my mouth. Don't kill me." "Don't worry, I'll tell her we forced it out of you." "He's sleeping in the doghouse until the kid graduates college." Norman joked. "Fucker." He muttered under his breath.

Aria sat in her office with her laptop open and paperwork strewn across the desk. She'd been working ongetting everything in order and streamlined for her upcoming maternity leave. It was many months away but she wanted everything to run smoothly without her at the helm. Javier would take over running the original restaurant, while her latest hire at the second location would cover for her. Aria wasn't planning on taking more than a month, at least for the moment, but she needed to know her businesses weren't going to fall apart while away. 

When her phone began ringing, her caller-id flashed a picture of Jeffrey grinning like a lunatic. Smiling at the image, Aria answered, "Hello, handsome." "I'm just going to start this conversation with an apology." Jeffrey replied, his voice hoarse and slightly strained. "Oooookay," Aria drawled, her brow furrowed but lips twitching. "I'm listening." "I fucked up and I'm sorry." She couldn't help but feel a ripple of worry at his serious tone and words, the possibilities of what he could've done to warrant such a thing baffling her. "What happened?" "You know how I was at the Con today?" "Yeah..." "Well... I kinda..." he huffed, clearing his throat anxiously. "Jeff, you're freaking me the fuck out. What'd you do?" "I had a interviewer asking about us and asking how I find time to film everything and do cons and still see you... and I mean I didn't mean to say it. It just slipped out and then I couldn't shove the words back in my huge fucking mouth."

"What'd you say?" She asked, her phone beeping in the background as another call came in. Glancing at the id she saw Meagan was calling and then a few text messages flooded her phone from their publicity manager. 

"Shit." She muttered, "what'd you say Jeff?" "I said we make it work, that I travel a lot but put the effort in and then I may have slipped up and mentioned how I'll be traveling back home a lot more to make it to all your.. appointments...." "Jesus Christ." She muttered, her head thumping to the desk. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I said it.. I just... fucking hell. I'm sorry, sweets. I know it's earlier than we wanted to announce it."

A knock on the office door had Aria peeling her face from the wood to see her restaurant manager peering at her oddly. "Hold on a sec." she muttered into the phone. "What's up?" "Um.. I just thought you should know that there are quite a few paparazzi out front.. if your leaving any time soon, I'd sneak out the back." "Son of bitch." She growled, while rubbing her face. "Thanks, Kelly." "No worries." "Aria." She heard from her phone. "What's going on?" "Well I was just being told there are camera men all over the front of my restaurant." "Shit." "Yeah.. Jeff." She whined, "why?" "It was an accident, doll. It just... fuck. I'm happy about it okay and you know how I fucking am. I was talking to Norm about it and then they asked and then I just... I fucked up. Don't hate me."

"I could never hate you, dummy." She scoffed, rubbing her temple as a headache began to take over. "I might sew your mouth shut though." "Come on, darlin'." He rasped, his tone soft. "How will I make it up to you, if my mouth’s out of commission."

"Oh, and how are you making it up to me?" "Well I figured I'd be on my hands and knees begging for forgiveness." "Mmm." She hummed, at the words and the promise contained in them. "Might be a good start."

"I really am sorry, sweetheart. I didn't mean to." "I know." She spoke with a sigh. "Good thing I know you're just a big mouth when you're happy." "I am happy." He replied, the grit in his voice causing chills to run up Aria’s spine. "Very fucking happy, sweetpea. Never been happier."

"Me neither, baby." She murmured, her eyes closing shut at the rumbled sound he released at her words. The idea that she could effect him such a way, cinching her chest and twisting her stomach. 

"I'm missin' you." He grumbled, "almost more than I can bare." "Soon you'll be home and I'll accept your deepest, most sincere apology." His rich laugh had her smiling widely, her chest loosen of its anxiety. "I can't wait, darlin'."

She tasted like honey, her mouth pliable and welcoming. Jeffrey drank her in like a dope fiend, his fingers curling into her hair and curves desperately. It'd been days since he'd been able to touch and taste his wife, the time away turning him savage. 

"Jeff." She gasped as his hands dropped to her thighs to hike her up his body as though she weighed nothing. Carrying her towards their bedroom, Jeffrey sucked a hot path along her neck while kneading her ass with large hands. "Yeah, doll." He muttered into her wet skin. "You like that?" "Yes." "You want me?" "Fuck, yes." She moaned as he climbed onto the bed while she was still wrapped around his body. "Mmmh." He grumbled deeply, his teeth nipping her collarbone and curve of her t-shirt covered tits. "You missed me?"

"Yes, so much." Aria gasped, her fingers curled into his hair as his mouth travelled downwards. Pushing her t-shirt up and over her head, Jeffrey tugged her bra down to lap a greedy circle around her nipple. His hooded gaze did not stray from her dark eyes, his mouth latched onto her breast as his hands worked her pants off. Nothing was close enough or deep enough, his mouth and hands feverishly trying to consume every single morsel. 

After stripping her bare, his mouth and tongue travelled down her stomach. He couldn't pass up the accentuated curves now taking shape above his favorite playground. Kissing around her belly button, he dipped his tongue in while watching her flushed face become desperate. Her pretty little mouth dropped open and her fingers curled into the sheets as his thumbs traced the wet seam between her legs. Nuzzling his face into her stomach he couldn't get enough of feeling the changes her body was making to care for his kid. 

Peering up at her as he slid down the bed and spread her legs wide open. "I'm going to apologize now." "Oh yeah?" She gasped, her hips undulating off the bed. Aria was squirming under his grip, her body desperate for more. "Oh fucking yeah." He growled before dragging his broad tongue along her wet core. A moan that sounded as though it originated in her toes, ripped from her lungs as she fluttered under his tongue and hands. "Mmmhm." Jeffrey purred, his mouth rutting deeper into her willing pussy. "So needy." "Yes. Please." "So fucking polite." He growled, nipping her inner thighs playfully. "You need more baby girl." "Fuck yes." Aria groaned when his fingers sunk inside. Humming while licking and sucking her lips, Jeffrey allowed his free hand to slid up her stomach to her swelling breast. He watched her carefully as he massaged and twisted her nipple, the man knowing she'd been sensitive as of late. "That okay?" He rasped, while tugging on her nipples. "Yes." She moaned, her body rolling with every thrust of his fingers and flick of his tongue. "Jeff."  "Yeah, sweetheart." He growled, burrowing into her folds to lick and suck her deeper. "Gimme what I want." "Fuck... I'm.." "You're close. Come on, beautiful."  Jeffrey rasped while panting over her soaked lips. "Cum on my mouth baby." Covering her hood with his hot mouth, Jeffrey sucked a fast rhythm as he rubbed his curled fingers on that spot she loved. The reaction was instant, as her body seemed to cave in on itself, while exploding like a live wire.

 Aria’s legs tried to clamp around his head but he pinned them down to keep her spread out and open. She whined at the action, her hips twisting under his grip, while he licked and sucked greedily on her lips and clit. 

"Jeff... please." "Please what?" The words sounding rough and breathless. He dipped his head and flicked her hooded sharply. "Please that?" "No." "Mmhm." Jeffrey rumbled into her hot core, his dark eyes looking over the appealing flush spreading up her chest and staining her cheeks. She was so achingly beautiful, Jeffrey could barely stand it. The tug in his chest from just looking at her was almost overwhelming. "Tell me." He murmured, his breath hot and heavy against her swollen lips. "Say it, darlin'." "Please fuck me." "Goddamn." He growled, before placing a hot wet kiss over her clit and climbing up the bed towards her. "You're so fucking gorgeous." "So are you, handsome." She purred, her fingers sliding over his ribs and chest, curling into his chest hair. 

"I missed you." He rasped, bumping his nose against hers affectionately. Kissing her softly, while lining himself up with her welcoming heat, Jeffrey kept his eyes affixed to hers. He rolled his hips forward with one instant thrust, parting her lips and sliding inside. Aria’s eyes widened, her mouth falling open as he sunk into her with no retreat. "Oh god." "Yeah, that's what you need, huh sweet girl?" "Yes." She panted, her eyes fluttering as he pulled back, only to plunge that much further. "Je-sus.." Jeffrey growled into the side of her neck, his teeth bared and desperate to bite something. She felt like home and it was as though the tightness he'd been carrying since he left, was gone. 

Aria brought her knees up his ribs and curled her limbs around him. Jeffrey began rocking into her, his hips slamming into her spread core.   "Yeah." He growled, nipping her jaw as she fluttered around his aching dick. "Cum. I wanna feel it." "Fuck." Aria gasped, her fingers digging into his shoulder blades, as he snapped his hips sharply. "Do it for me, sweets." He drawled, his mouth sucking and licking her jaw and neck. "Cum for daddy."

Every muscle in her soft body became stiff, her arms and legs clutching him desperately. A whine crawled from her arched throat as he continued the thrust straight through her orgasm. He growled and moaned as she spasmed around his dick, the clenching grip becoming too much to bare. "Damn, doll." He groaned, his hips rocking hard and deep. "Gonna cum. Fuck. Look at me." Her deep eyes starred up at him, the beautiful girl with swollen lips and flushed cheeks. "You're so gorgeous." Jeffrey moaned, before cumming in throbbing pulses. He pressed his open mouth to her pulse point and sucked, while rolling his hips lazily. "So good." Aria gasped, her lips and tongue tasting his shoulders and neck. Groaning as she clenched around his still hard dick, he clutched her to his body and murmured, "missed you so much, darlin'." "Me too, handsome." Pressing his forehead against hers, Jeffrey asked, "Do you accept my apology?" Snorting at his question, Aria replied, "it was a good start."

*** I borrowed from JDM real life experience when he spilled the beans about the sex of his new baby. *****

Find Chapter Forty-Nine here:

http://jesbakescookies.tumblr.com/post/170200535401/too-hot-to-handle-chapter-forty-nine

I started posting this fic over on AO3 also. I will probably post in both places since I’m still figuring out AO3 formatting etc.

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged for updates. I’ll try my best to remember!

@magikat409 @cadeviolet @aforrester77422 @bethcarli @thamberlina @star017 @bec-brained-blarg @blackmother77 @adriannawiggins @jdm-negan-mcnaughty @negans-network @negansmutweek @cltex84 @audreychaz @wolfhart18 @ruggedasfuck @warriorqueen1991 @yellatthetopofyourlungs @hotfornegan @ladyynegan @uhh-dope @brandi-sykestw @negandarylsatisfaction @londoncapsule @morganstopbeinghotkthx  @sicksadtired @wolfgirl1074 @sophisti-kate-ed @jdmsgal @sasquaatch68 @spideygeek @arkhamasylumpatient-blog1 @cupcake5365 @ @soft-spokenangel @beegnc @mandilion76 @prettyepiic @beautifuldizasterfics @kitcat44 @mayuketchupytostones @ibelongtonegan @azanoni @alyisdead @mwesterfeld1985 @helena-mrs-murder @lovexxxkittyxxxblog @nu1freakshow @jenn0755 @skylouise12         @mysacredstardust   @thatprettymvthafvcka @beltz2016 @soythedemonqueen  @disturbthepearls @writteninthestars288   @queenslandlover-93   @ledger-kaos @jackythemoossconcept @jdmsgal @lovesjdm @adixon13 @doyouhaveavacancy

#Jeffrey Dean Morgan #jeffrey dean morgan x oc #jdm #jdm x oc #RPF #actor RPF #actor real person fiction #fanfiction #smut #too hot to handle #jesbakescookies #negan #negans thirst squad #negan x oc #negans-network

[lifeisdabubbles-undersalmondean]

La Pomme ~ Chapter 10

Pairing: Sam x OC (eventual Dean x OC and Dean x Castiel. And I mean eventual.)

Series summary: George is a casual French-Mistake-universe Supernatural fan living in no-COVID 2020, who's life is upended when she's suddenly launched between realities, two years into the boys' past (S13E22). What begins as an insane, immersive fan experience turns into more when Jack goes missing and George offers up her AU information to help track him down. Soon it's discovered that she and Sam may actually have history. But that's impossible, right?

Word Count: 4,500

Warnings: {smut, fluff, angst, show level violence, swearing, mentions of suicide} ***Detailed warnings will be tagged for specific chapters.

A/N: Following the events of my prequel Paradise and second story From My Eyes Off. Reading those first gives context but isn’t necessary to start this one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About 4 hours later, George stirred awake as she began getting hit in the face with the bright morning sun. She was surprised to find Sam driving, with Dean passed out next to him. Castiel looked like he hadn't moved an inch since she'd closed her eyes and she smiled at his resolve. When she finally shifted, she noticed a large unfamiliar, tan jacket laying across her lap.

Reaching up to lightly touch Sam on the shoulder, gently alerting him to her presence, she whispered, "What time is it?"

"Hey, morning. A little after six. You doing OK? Need to pee?" He teased gently and she smiled.

"I'm alright at the moment, though I wouldn't turn down a chance to stretch my legs." She sat up in her seat, stretching as much as she could without invading Cas' space. Sam watched in the rear view as she crossed her arms above her head and arched her back for a stretch. He caught himself admiring the way the fabric of her shirt lifted up just enough for him to catch a fleeting glimpse of the skin on her waist. There was more bright ink peeking out from the top of her khakis, he noticed. She released the stretch much too soon in his opinion and then leaned over to pick up the jacket that had fallen off of her lap. She held it up questioningly to Sam and he adjusted himself in his seat, clearing his throat.

"Oh, that's, uh-mine." He stuttered, reaching back and taking it from her outstretched hands. "The backseat can get cold."

"Mm," She smiled and nodded appreciatively. "Thanks. How long have you been driving?"

"Just about 3 hours. I could use a stretch myself; I think there's a rest stop ahead a few miles." She nodded lazily, still brushing off the sleep, and looked over at Cas.

"You been keeping a weather eye out, Castiel?" She asked teasingly.

"Yes ma'am. Can never be too careful with these two." As nervous as she made him, he actually liked George. She eagerly included him in conversation and car games, which he wasn't used to. He also enjoyed her attempts to banter with him and he was getting better at deciphering them and even participating.

"Good man." She patted his shoulder appreciatively.

Cas nodded in solidarity, then he raised an eyebrow at her inquisitively. George smiled and raised both her eyebrows in response, waiting for him to speak. Based on his expression, she assumed he wanted to ask her a question. When he didn't speak, she raised her eyebrows more to encourage him. He darted his eyes to Sam; his face dropped quickly.

George followed his gaze to Sam and was startled at the daggers he was staring at Cas. She asked, "What? What's with the eyes?"

When Sam noticed her looking, he dropped his angry face and shrugged, "Nothin'? No eyes." Cas shrugged awkwardly in agreement. George looked between the two of them skeptically. She knew what she saw.

Narrowing her eyes, she demanded, "What?"

"Nothing," Cas stated with an incredibly unconvincing tone. George's head whipped to look at Sam as he rolled his eyes at Cas before he could stop himself.

She was annoyed now, "Seriously, guys-what?! Do I have a zit? Was I drooling in my sleep or-?" Her face fell suddenly and she winced, "Did I say something embarrassing?" She'd had partners mention her sleep talking once or twice and she'd been having a strangely vivid dream about Sam just before the sunshine woke her up. Considering the content, she prayed she hadn't said anything.

At her question, Cas and Sam exchanged a confused look. They both shook their heads as Sam answered, "Nope, no drooling, no talking. And no zits," he ended with a smirk.

George looked relieved for a moment and then frowned, "Then what? Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked Cas and then looked at Sam, "And why are you trying to keep him quiet?"

Sam pulled an innocent face, "I'm not-"

"Save it, dude! I saw you," George laughed at his innocent-little-brother face. "What's goin' on?"

Cas folded, "We were just wonder-"

Sam cut him off with a "No!" so loud that Dean startled awake with a snort.

"The hell?" Dean grumbled. Sam sighed defeatedly. He knew it was too late to stop the inevitable now, but he'd really tried. This was going to be painful.

"I believe your thug brother is threatening Castiel into keeping secrets," George stated annoyedly, crossing her arms over her chest.

Wiping the sleep from his eyes, Dean responded with a confused, "Huh?"

Castiel explained, defensively, "I was just trying to ask George if she's a 'Deangirl' or a 'Samgirl'."

George's eyes went wide. Large, angry red splotches began to appear on her pale cheeks and a sweat broke out on her brow. Sam gripped the steering wheel tightly, clenching his jaw and looking mortified.

Dean let out a loud, "Ha!" Chuckling, he sat up right and murmured, "Definitely glad I got woken up for this."

"What?" Cas huffed, seeing everyone's reactions. "I know you said we weren't supposed to say anything when she woke up, but you two were having a lively discussion about it earlier and I j-"

George choked on nothing and sputtered, "The two of you were having a lively discussion about wheth-" Dean and Sam both pulled the same innocent expression, though Dean couldn't hide his glee.

Sam cut her off with a stutter, "We weren't-It-it wasn't exactly-there was no-"

Dean shook his head, cutting him off with a matter-of-fact, "We were just trying to explain to Cas more about the reality you came from-with the show and everything? Naturally the subject of the fans came up..."

"They weren't sure which 'girl' designation you fell into. I didn't see what the issue was with just politely asking?"

"It's not a polite question, Cas!" George snapped in humiliation.

"Oh…" He frowned, "why not?"

"Because!" She explained fully.

"There are just some things you don't ask a woman, Cas," Dean offered with a bemused chuckle.

Cas' brows furrowed, looking curiously at George, "Does this question somehow relate to your age or menstrual cycle?"

"Sweet Jesus," George laughed to keep from crying in embarrassment, hiding her face behind her hands. She knew this was how Cas was but she wasn't prepared to experience his naivete in real life. The Kegel comments she could handle but this was beyond.

Sam desperately tried to re-rail the train wreck that was happening, "Cas, what Dean meant to say was, there are some things you shouldn't ask people. Humans, in general. Private things."

"Mortifying things," George groaned from behind her hands.

Cas was still confused, "And asking someone whether they're a 'Samgirl' or a 'Deangirl' is private?"

George dropped her hands and nodded emphatically, "In the context of our current situation, yes!"

"Why?"

"Because!" When he looked at her with a patient expression on his face she realized he'd need more than that. "Because… because…" she looked to Sam and Dean for help but neither one offered any. "Ugh, because it's the same as asking... 'Hey, Cas, if you had to, who would you rather sleep with, Dean or Sam?'"

"Don't answer that," Dean said slowly, with a frown.

"Not so amusing now, is it?" George smirked triumphantly at him.

"Well, I don't sleep but if you're saying I have to, then I guess I'd rather not-sleep with Sam," Castiel determined, after some thought.

"What?!" Came a half offended, half surprised echo from the front.

George's eyes lit up with far too much glee, "Oooooh?"

"Yes, definitely Sam," He nodded, more sure than before. Seeing their expressions - George's filled with joy, Dean's slightly hurt, and Sam pleasantly shocked - he explained, "Dean is an angry sleeper. The risk of getting shot is high. Sleeping-or not-with Sam would be far safer."

"Oooh, darn!" George laughed disappointedly at Cas' unexpected-yet-entirely-expected literal interpretation. The brothers looked relieved and also mildly amused.

Cas was lost, "I fail to understand what this has to do with-"

Dean 'ughed' deeply before explaining, "It's about sex, Cas." Sam cringed, eyes focused on the road. George groaned painfully and turtled her head inside her shirt as much as possible. "You essentially asked George which one of us she'd rather have sex with. Which-while incredibly entertaining for me-is a personal question," he finished uncharacteristically kindly.

George peeked her eyes out, surprised to see the sincere look on Dean's face, "Hmm, that actually wasn't as bad as I thou-"

Sam cut her off with a quiet, knowing, "Wait for it."

Just as George made eye contact with Dean he added, "I mean, it's none of our business how much sex George wants to have with Sam."

"And there it is," Sam finished knowingly with a frustrated eye roll.

"Ass!" George shrieked and punched Dean in the shoulder before retreating back into her shirt. Dean laughed heartily, flinching a bit.

"So, anyway," Sam began helpfully, trying to change the subject. "I'm kinda curious how much the show-the one of us, in-in your reality-how much it matches up with our real lives?"

George slowly came out of her shirt, blinking quickly, and thought for a moment, "Uhm, well I don't really know. I mean I've watched the show but like I said before, I wasn't the biggest fan in terms of… for lack of a better term, 'the lore' of it. I know bits and pieces here and there, but I'm by no means an expert."

"But you don't have the books?" Dean followed up curiously.

"The books are in the show, but I'm pretty sure they aren't published in… my 'real life'-who knows what the hell that is anymore. If I understand correctly, each book was supposed to equate to one episode in a season of the TV show. The published books stopped when Dean went to hell right?" Dean grumbled a yes and George continued, "OK, for the TV show that's the end of season three."

"How many seasons are there?" Dean asked curiously.

"Uhh, I think fifteen, so far?" Had it been canceled? She couldn't remember.

"Fifteen?! People have been watching our lives for-" Dean cut off and took a breath. "I can't decide if I'm annoyed that people are watching our boring ass lives for that long or that our lives are dramatic enough to be a television show for that long."

"What season did we come to your reality?" Sam wondered. Dean 'ughed' loudly at the memory.

With an amused shake of her head, she answered, "Season six, I think? Such a great episode! That whole season was pretty solid, actually. A great combination of funny yet emotionally gripping. I think that was also Cas and Meg kissing-" She looked at Cas earnestly and interjected into her own rambling, "That was awesome-and the posse magnet episode-which, btw, of course, people made shirts of that." For once in this conversation Dean looked happy, giving Sam a pleased expression, which garnered an eyeroll.

"If I'm not mistaken that was also the season with soul-" she was about to say "soulless Sam" but her heart twinged and she realized she couldn't be so flippant with the fandom created monikers anymore. These were no longer just characters, they were, inexplicably, very real people whom she now knew.

And cared about, she heard a tiny voice add.

"Er, it covered Sam's time after hell…without a soul," She grimaced a bit in sympathy, not knowing how best to fill in the blanks.

Sam's face went from startled to shame on a small delay. Further confirmation that she knew of the million awful things he'd done, he grimaced. If she knew everything it could not bode well. The thought filled him with a surprising amount of disappointment.

She'd seen the look on his face and quickly added with a hopeful smile, "And it also covered the time after you got your soul back! Which included the French Mistake!"

"The French Mistake?" Castiel asked.

"The one when they came to my reality!" George grinned and Dean made a yuck face. "You guys had so much great chemistry that episode. Making fun of their names and the alpacas, it was golden. Can't say enough about how hilarious that episode was. I was surprised by the dialogue about their tension on set because that's actually always been rumored to be true. It seems weird that they'd talk about it if it was true, though, so who knows what to think?" The men in the car certainly didn't but they nodded politely and let her ramble. "So, either it's all just stupid rumors and they find it funny or-HOLD ON!" Suddenly her face fell and she looked at Sam in shock upon realizing, "Did you sleep with Jared's wife?"

Three pairs of eyes were boring into Sam and he shrunk down in his seat, looking stunned and stuttering, "Er-I-Uh-You-you know abou-"

"You had sex with fake Ruby?!" Dean was beyond indignant.

"Who's Jared?" Cas asked.

Sam looked mortified and George instantly felt bad about starting them down this path. She hadn't meant to embarrass him, she just failed to think before she spoke sometimes. Especially after realizations like that. Obviously, this whole "Supernatural is real" had more ramifications than she'd realized.

Making a mental note to maybe ask him about it later, she quickly changed the subject, "They were filming the French Mistake when we lost Misha." Frowning sadly, she patted Castiel's knee, "I want you to know I was devastated about that. Misha was my favorite Castiel."

Castiel looked confused, glancing at Sam and Dean, "Thank you?" She smiled and squeezed his knee gently before letting go. "So, in your reality, I'm dead?" Castiel asked with a contemplative look.

"Well…" She paused, trying to think of how to explain it so he would understand, "you're not-er Castiel is not. But the actor who played the vessel you're currently inhabiting is."

"Jimmy Novak?" Castiel confirmed and George nodded a bit.

"That sounds right," She agreed; she'd only seen the episode once so she couldn't be sure. "When Misha died tragically in that horrible stabbing 'accident,' the writers were just going to write Castiel out of the show but the fandom fired upon them with the white hot rage of a Deastiel shipper left unsatisfied," Her eyes were wide with emphasis; Sam snickered, Dean huffed and Castiel was oblivious, "so they quickly brought you back in a new vessel a couple episodes later." {author's note: yes I prefer 'Deastiel', it makes the most sense for the mashup of both their names IMO and it's my story}

The three men considered the scenario for a minute. Sam seemed unsure, Dean wondered what the new actor looked like, and Cas paused, then nodded, "Well, I suppose that makes sense. If I could find another vessel willing and able to hold me I'd want to still be around to help." George smiled at his loyalty. She hadn't realized how much she'd missed MishaCas. The replacement actor was fine but to her, the chemistry was never the same.

George said absentmindedly, "As far as I can tell-though my knowledge is obviously limited-most of the rest of the story line from the show has been the same here? Castiel's the only major difference I recognize."

After a long, pregnant pause, Dean asked tentatively, "So… exactly, how much do you know about us?"

George squinted a little at him and asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well… like, do they show everything?"

George smirked and shook her head, "It's basic cable not HBO. Maybe a handful of shirtless scenes but nothing Game of Thrones graphic. The focus of the show is the supernatural-is you guys, hunting and saving and all that, so not really a lot of romantic, naked stuff. The focus of the fandom, on the other hand? Well that's a very different story," She cracked with a chuckle.

The next nine or so hours of their car ride passed fairly uneventfully as George rambled about the show, asking them questions and comparing notes about their lives. Dean took over driving after a pitstop and as the hours turned into nearly day(s), everyone-including Cas-started getting a little punchy, not to mention ripe. Nice, fun friendly games of I-Spy or the license plate game had dissolved into butt-hurt bickering and the silence that returned to the car for the last two hours had been welcomed by everyone.

Finally, though, George caught a road sign for Reno, Nevada - 30 miles and decided she couldn't take it anymore. She was sore, tired, tired of wearing a bra, in desperate need of a shower-or three, and she didn't know how much longer she could keep silently farting and blaming it on Cas. Luckily for her, he remained his usual indifferent self but Dean certainly seemed to be getting suspicious of the smells emanating from the back. She also made the startling realization that she had no change of clothes with her during one of her earlier daydreams about a long hot bath. Hopefully she'd made enough headway with Dean for him not to be too pissed when she mentioned it.

"Hey, I have a fun new game we could try." George paused to allow the three grumpuses to groan in unison before continuing, "it's called let's stop in a real town-say Reno!-and get some actual food and maybe a hotel room for some actual sleep for the first time in 24 hours! Any takers?" She tried to keep her expectations low. "Dean, I bet Reno has great pie."

"You know what George?" Dean began in a mock angry voice, pausing for dramatic effect. "They have some damn good pie in Reno. Remember that one place just off the 659, Sammy? That pie was orgasmic! What was that place called…"

"Brown Cub Diner?" George offered.

"That's it! How'd you know?"

"I'm from Carson City; I grew up around here. Brown Cub Diner is famous in our area. Have you tried their pancakes? They have a special sweet cream batter and those flapjacks just melt in your mouth." She saw Dean's reaction and could almost taste the hot, bubbly bath water and nice soft warm (flat!) mattress. She pressed on, "I think we're only about 30 minutes from there?"

"Ya know Dean, we have been driving for about 24 hours. Obviously, we need to get to Jack but we're of no use to him if we're sore and exhausted. Wouldn't be such a bad idea to take a break, get some good food, take a shower," he gave an exaggerated, unpleasant smell look in George's direction and she swatted his shoulder, "and recharge before hitting the road for the last stretch?" George could have kissed Sam for the assist, even if he did use it as an excuse to call her funky. Rude.

"Fine," Dean huffed and everyone, well Sam and George, Cas was pretty indifferent, celebrated with high fives. "But we're getting pie-and pancakes-first!"

"Uh, if I could just interject one quick additional favor?" George asked, causing Dean to let out a low exasperated, yet questioning growl. "I literally only have the clothes on my back and seeing as how there also happens to be a Target just off the freeway on Sparks Blvd coming up in 2 miles," she pointed to the excellently timed street sign they were passing, "then perhaps we could make a super quick stop so that I could get a change of clothes or two?" It all came out in one breath and she stopped to catch her next. "Pretty please?"

Dean remained silent as he drove the next two miles and George was starting to feel deflated. But when he pulled off the Sparks Blvd exit, she wrapped her arms around his neck from behind for a thank you hug, causing him to swerve slightly and curse before gently sloughing her off. They arrived at Target and Dean parked toward the back, keeping his baby away from any other riff raff cars. Turning off the engine, he then produced a wallet from his back pocket. He dug out a small stack of $20s and handed it to her.

"We typically like to pay for things, Sticky Fingers." Dean began.

"With all your stolen money?" She asked cheekily, because she just couldn't help herself either. He was the quintessential big brother and it set her little sister mode on 11 every time.

He paused and gave her a squinted stare before continuing, "In and out in 30 minutes; those flapjacks are calling my name!"

She thanked Dean for the cash, promising to pay him back before realizing how impossible that was, and the three boys decided to wait in the car while she ran in.

Heading first for the toiletries for some personal essentials, she then doubled back toward the front where she picked up a generic pair of tennies-comfort and function seemed more important than style in her current situation-and a packet of white socks. Next she grabbed up two half-decent bras and a pack of underwear before crossing over to the racks of outerwear. She'd tried to work out in the car how many items she'd need and to keep things conservative she figured a two-three pair of pants and the same amount of plain shirts would suffice. She'd finally settled on two pairs of dark denim boot cut jeans and one pair of black cotton joggers, along with two fitted, v-neck, long sleeved t-shirts, one in navy, one in maroon, a black sleeveless undershirt, and couldn't help grabbing an oversized pink and black madres plaid button down. She also grabbed a black pull over hoodie with the Friends logo, since she knew that the redwoods could get pretty cold and she was stoked that Friends was still a thing in this reality. Lastly, she grabbed a pair of plain, flowy black PJ pants and a large men's pale blue v-neck tee for sleeping, and made her way toward the register.

As she waited in line with her cart, spacing out about whether or not she grabbed too much or not enough of each clothing item, she caught a glimpse of something familiar out of the corner of her eye. Three lanes away from her a short, chubby woman with mousy, short brown and graying hair, wearing a familiar pale green jacket was also checking out. From behind, the woman looked exactly like George's mother and she felt whiplashed back to her reality.

"Mom?" Her voice came out scratchy and quiet as she involuntarily called out to the woman. Part of her felt compelled to scream out, run over and grab her into a hug, listen happily as her mom comfortingly told George that everything was OK and she'd just been dreaming. But she was frozen in place by shock. Her heart pounded in her chest as she watched the woman-her mother! She was sure of it!-finish her transaction and head for the front door. George looked back at her cart and the money in her hand. She debated with herself for half a second before abandoning the shopping cart and bolting after the pale green jacket that had exited the store and disappeared from her sight. She made chase, stopping at the edge of the sidewalk in front of the store and frantically searching the parking lot for the woman.

When George finally spotted her unloading her purchases into a car she didn't recognize, George's stomach dropped. She could now see her face and it was very clear that the lovely middle eastern woman was not her mother. Tears began welling up in George's eyes, her face flushed red from emotion, and she walked over to lean on the building, trying to get a hold of herself.

Her mind was racing and she was trying to catch her breath in her panicked state. She had gotten so swept up in the adventure and insanity of this dreamlike experience that she'd forgotten about her actual life for the past 24 hours. But now that she thought about her old, boring normal life-a life where she wasn't crazy; where she wasn't feeling this constant, strange, unshakable feeling of inaccessible deja vu; where she wasn't carpooling with an angel to go rescue someone from potential death; where she wasn't conversing with Sam and Dean motherfucking Winchester-she wanted to run. All knowledge of how difficult and far-from-perfect her real life had been were forgotten in the moment. She glanced over toward the back of the parking lot where she could still see the Impala parked where she'd left it, then pulled the money out of her pocket, counting through it - $300.

As fate would have it, she spotted a taxi dropping a couple off near the corner of the building and jogged over.

"Are you taking fares?" She bent over to ask the driver as the couple walked away.

"Where you going?"

"Carson City?" George almost hoped the woman would turn her down.

"That's nearly 40 miles away, it's gonna be over $100?" The driver responded, questioningly. George shot one last guilty look back at the Impala before climbing into the back.

"Let's go." She crouched down low in her seat as they exited the parking lot and tried to ignore the intense guilt-nausea building in the pit of her stomach.

#supernatural fanfiction #supernatural #supernatural fanfic #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester #sam winchester fanfic #sam winchester x original character #sam winchester x original female character #spn fanfic series #spn fanfiction

[hermosavidamay-blog]

Notes | Jooheon ft. Hyungwon

A fresh breeze just gently passed by you made you giggle inside. Lately, you've been addicted to cappuccino from this one café near your house. The café had that soft gaze and you felt like you were laying in one of your sofas enjoying silence in your apartment.

You walked wearing your casual clothes and letting your hair play with those breezes of this season. You stopped once you reached the café. “Thanks a latte” was the name. It was pretty interesting when you visited it for first time, you thought that the owner really got an amazing way of thinking to come with such name, a catchy one.

You entered the café running to your usual place. You just giggled as you saw little boys playing outside. You liked this place because it was near window, you managed to see how dynamic the day is. Everybody working, walking, arguing, smiling and sometimes crying. You were having a stable life, yet you had your moments. Moments when you felt like no one suffered more than you, is when you found this café and this whole place. You kinda managed to balance yourself just from seeing people from outside a window, plus their cappuccino is literally a heaven.

That wasn't the only thing. You had received notes with your cappuccino secretly every time. You tried to ask but all the workers around denied that they know or they may doubt someone doing it. To be honest, the notes didn't annoy you but you wanted to know who was the one sending them. Cheerful words, hearts doddles and even a confession once.

You took all those notes home with you, you tried to find out something but tsk. You were insane, were you so desperate that you fell in love with the owner of these notes? A person you don't even know if they exist.

You were taken away from your thoughts when the waiter came for your order. It isn't that you were so thoughtful but the thing is that he is so beautiful. So beautiful that you wanted deeply to ask “Sorry are you even real?”

You rose your head and you stayed calm for like 2 minutes when he decided to break the silence and ask you again.

“What are you going to drink?” He asked nervously watching your face emotionless literally.

When he started to talk you followed everything came from his mouth. You watched how his pretty lips moved in synchrony. His brown hair, his little eyes and the smile he gave earlier.

“Are you alright?” He passed his hand closer to your eyes and you suddenly realized you were daydreaming.

“Oh- I'm embarrassing.” You softly hit your head which made him let a little chuckle looking at you.

“I will take the cappuccino and yes maybe some cake. I heard you have nice ones here.” You continued trying to distract yourself from looking at him over and over again.

He just nodded as he walked back where he was and your eyes just followed him too.

Did you just slightly stalked a stranger? This is so embarrassing yet you felt good keeping your eye on him.

You played with your phone for a while you waited patiently for the order to come. You heard footsteps as you turned you saw him coming with those smiling eyes that suddenly became your favourite thing.

“Your cappuccino..? What's your name by the way if you don't mind telling.” He said politely always keeping that smile.

You just chuckled. “Surely I don't mind. It's (y/n), what about you?”

“Jooheon.” He just sais as he pointed his fingers out to the cashier era. “ (y/n). I wanted to bring you something as sweet as you but all were so I guess you should pick the cake you like the most.”

Did he just said this god. You thought as you kept it cool and nodded following him. The cakes were perfectly classed, and all were delicious and fancy, you just followed your heart to pick one.

You finally choose a one and he gladly made it for you with a thumb up saying that this cake was one of the best ones.

You just sit again in your place when your phone started vibrating. You checked your phone seeing “Hyungwon” in the screen wasn't satisfying. Your ex boyfriend who dumped you weeks ago calling you again why? Does he even know that this is your number or is he drunk?.

You were feeling uncomfortable yet you just wanted to make him understand that you don't care. You picked the call.

“What do you want" You coldly replied.

“Look, I am sorry. My fault, I didn't know you meant this much to me until I lost you.” Hyungwon spoke on the other line.

You were just quiet, holding your precious tears. How can people be this shit? He made you die in these months and now wow he wants you back?

“Save your lies for another upcoming girlfriend of yours.” You were about to curse and hang up the call when he suddenly said he is outside the café and wanna talk to you.

You didn't notice that Jooheon was standing in there all the time when you just held yourself to clear the idea to the tall pole outside.

Walking to the exit, you managed to see Hyungwon. Jooheon just walked behind you secretly when you were suddenly welcomed with a hug.

“Get your hands off me.” You pushed the male away looking at his gaze. That gaze you always failed to say no to, you're now standing in front it coldly.

“(y/n). Please. Just listen once. I know you still love me.” He tried to reach your hand but you just let out a loud sarcastic laugh.

"love me? Which drama did you watch yesterday and got you brainwashed.”

“It was enough what you did so just away.” You said throwing that death glare at him. Hyungwon stopped you holding your wrist so strong when you felt yourself grabbed by another hand to the other side.

“Your hands off her.” You heard Jooheon talking to your ex. That smile faded, that soft cat was a dangerous tiger at that moment.

“Who are you talk to me” Hyungwon let out a smirk pointing at Jooheon.

“The one who was there when your ass decided to dump her.”

Wait,what?. You were speechless hearing such. You barely know him, and he is doing this to help you.

“So that's your new boy huh.” Hyungwon just looked at you as he continued “Not even near your type. I know you still deeply want me anyways.”

“I said your hands off her.” Jooheon just grabbed your other hand strongly from Hyungwon. It was hurtful but you managed to free yourself from him, when you were dragged inside the café again.

You were about to say something when Jooheon suddenly held your hand tight. “Did it hurt? I'm really sorry but he was just- he just irritated me”

You nodded as you bowed twice. “I'm sorry I get you into this and I barely know you I mean.”

“You indirectly know me for couple of weeks now.” Jooheon finally faced your eyes.

“It's pretty crazy but hey listen. The notes you've been receiving were from me.”

He just cleared his throat as he continued. “When you first came here to this café it was couples of weeks when you broke up with him. You didn't notice me since my actual job is a Batista so I’m always behind. Yet I had the idea of coming asking you what's wrong.”

“I didn't want a beautiful angel like you to waste her tears. I thought seeing me wouldn't be a good idea so I preferred notes. And it worked. (y/n), it took me a lot of time to gather this strength and face you.”

You felt a squeeze in your hand when he held it tighter yet softer. Your heart was going crazy with all up and down beats. “Seeing him today trying to get you just irritated me.”

You didn't know what to do. Jooheon was the one with those notes that brought brightness and happiness to your life after losing them. Those jokes, those caring stuffs. You just get notes but you knew how much the one behind them sincere.

“Those notes were everything to me these couple of weeks.” You replied looking at him. “I tried to get to know who but your co-workers denied always. I thought I was getting nuts. I just want to say to that person that I loved them too.”

You couldn't finish your sentence when a pair of soft lips pressed against yours. You felt butterflies all over your ears, tummy and heart. You just kissed back and you felt the harmony you two were going in. It was crazy but guess what? Life is. People outside and the workers in the café all gathered watching you two flying in your own world when you suddenly opened your eyes breaking the kiss out of huge embarrassing moment.

You chuckled as you looked at him. “So, no notes for today?”

He ruffled your hair smiling. “Jooheonie will speak instead from now on.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I’m the worst at this but yes, I tried? Please wait for my upcoming one too. Don’t forget to contact me for any requests but please be patient with my little poor skills. Enjoy ♡

#monsta x #monsta x x reader #jooheon #hyungwon #monsta x senario #oneshot #monsta_x #monsta x imagines

[samdukewieland]

Stuck Inside Media Diary Week 5

I realized the last movie I saw in theaters was Little Women for the third time. Then that got me thinking about how I ranked my Top whatever movies from last year and inconsequential ranking things is. It was probably the movie that makes me feel the best; it and Knives Out were the two movies I saw the most in a theater last year and they were both the ones that I get excited talking about with people. Good flicks, you should check ‘em out. (I also re-learned recently that Emma Stone was originally supposed to play Meg who was played by Emma Watson. Had this happened, my brain would’ve collapsed due to trying to figure out how to balance crushes on Greta Gerwig, Saoirse Ronan, Florence Pugh, Laura Dern and Emma Stone all in the same thing).

Sunday, April 19

Deliverance, Boorman 1972

On the one hand there is no real way to prepare you for how awful the assault on Ned Beatty and John Voight scene is as well as having me wonder if this was actually a Vietnam movie masked in something about the destruction of the natural world (maybe it’s both or just one). On the other hand, I thought it’d be funny to compare the characters to this to the characters in American Pie, but there’s no Stiffler or Jim’s Dad in this movie, so it doesn’t completely work.

Mad Men, “Long Weekend”, “Indian Summer”, “Nixon Vs. Kennedy”, “The Wheel” [season 1 finale]

There’s two things I’ll never forget the first time I ran through the first season of Mad Men: 1. Thinking “is Don even good at his job? I don’t think we’ve even seen this guy even really do his job yet, how did he become partner?” and then “The Wheel happens”. 2. I had let one of my favorite History teachers borrow my DVDs (this would happen again in my life when I later lent my English teacher The Wire when I was a senior two years later) and when he finished the first season he and I talked about what dumb-dumb idiots we were because we hadn’t figured out that Peggy was definitely pregnant and were surprised by this revelation, while his girlfriend at the time figured it out instantly.

Parks And Rec, “Greg Pikitis”, “Ron And Tammy”

That these two episodes were on back-to-back was probably the moment in the public consciousness that Parks was the real deal. How could you not; I watch “Greg Pikitis” every Halloween.

The Last Dance, Parts 1 & 2

I can’t remember the last thing I watched in real time on the tv. It’s very possible, though I don’t think so, that The Last Dance might be quarantine great and in real life very, very good. It doesn’t really matter, because this thing is just crazy fun to watch, as a person who was not able to watch Jordan basketball and sometimes thinks that Gen Xers gets way too [whatever that Spongebob meme is where you capitalize every other letter in a sentence] about Michael Jordan. The music cues are God-tier.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Shows You Iron”, “Joe Pera Takes You To Breakfast”, “Joe Pera Takes You On A Fall Drive”

“Joe Pera Takes You To Breakfast” might be one of the funniest episodes of television I’ve seen in a long time. As someone who takes too much enjoyment in stream of consciousness humor, I might be too in the bag for this show. I certainly don’t know how to sell it to any of you, other than it might be the perfect counterpart to Review. That could just be that Joe Pera looks like an alt-universe Andy Daly or it could be that Forrest MacNeil could’ve, desperately, used a friend like Joe Pera if only just to see how they’d interact with each other.

Monday, April 20

Under The Silver Lake, Mitchell 2018 [as of now this is available on Prime]

I’m embarrassed that I caved into watching a stoner movie on 4/20, but I’m glad it was this. This weird, gross and beautifully shot weird little movie that really did some good work in reminding me that Andrew Garfield is good. People will argue that this broke his brain, when in reality it was those two embarrassing Spider-Man movies.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Shows You How To Dance”, “Joe Pera Talks You Back To Sleep”, “Joe Pera Reads You The Church Announcements”

So “Church Announcements” was the first episode of this show that I had ever seen, because I had three different friends recommend it to me because I had posted something about “Baba O’Riley” very off-handedly, not even knowing this episode existed. It’s probably the purest expression of joy and one of the most sincerely happy things I might have ever seen. I love this show so much.

Tuesday, April 21

The Birdcage, Nichols 1996 [as of now this is available on Prime]

This is a good reminder that Nathan Lane is insanely talented and easily one of the most undervalued performers alive. I wanted to watch a Gene Hackman movie and this was available and it’s pretty good. Sometimes plays shouldn’t be turned into movies, that’s my take here-what do you want from me.

Better Call Saul, “Something Unforgivable”

Safe to say Saul’s got the belt. I was listening to Greenwald and Ryan the other night and someone had throughout a hypothetical to them that if they could would they want Gilligan and the gang to to remake Breaking Bad now, and have that (essentially) be the spin-off from Saul instead of vice-versa. That then got me thinking about if there’s ever been a property that’s taken place within the same universe that waited almost a season and a half to introduce the character (or thing) that connected the two things? There’s probably some kind of sci-fi or fantasy story that nerds would be eager to inform me of and it’s called 2une or something like that. Cool if so! If not, then no one steal my idea, this could be huge.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Lights Up The Night with You”, “Joe Pera Talks to You About the Rat Wars of Alberta, Canada (1950–Present Day)”, “Joe Pera Answers Your Questions About Cold Weather” [Season 1 finale]

“Can you believe those jag-offs through a New Year’s Eve party with just one bottle of Disarooney” is something I just say out loud when I’m frustrated now. I stayed up until like 3AM last Tuesday wrapping up the first season.

Wednesday, April 22

The Stranger, Welles 1946 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

First Orson Welles movie. It was fine! I don’t really think it should’ve been an hour-and-a-half long, but I was also surprised that they were already making movies about Nazis escaping to the US in 1946, but I’m definitely not a historian and I’m sure a lot of things would surprise me about 1946. It’s also a public domain movie which is just kinda....weird and would probably piss off Orson Welles or maybe he’d be thrilled.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Hughes 1986 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

Maybe the best use of a Beatles song in a movie that doesn’t star The Beatles? I used to go back and forth on whether or not I like this movie, because so many people do like it and I used to be loathe to conform to non-controversial opinions. But something I think that gets really overlooked is how well this movie is shot-Hughes had a real eye for framing and blocking. Or maybe people talk about this all the time and I just haven’t cared to ever listen or seek it out.

The Plot Against America, “Part 2″

Mad Men,  [Season 2 premier] “For Those Who Think Young”, “Flight 1″

I had forgotten how GD disorienting this show can be when it goes out of its way to not tell you how much time has passed between each season (it’s like 15 months this time). That’s all I’ve got now, that and Duck Phillips: welcome back into my life, you sick son of a bitch.

Joe Pera Talks With You, [Season 2 premier] “Joe Pera Talks With You About Beans”, “Joe Pera Takes You On A Hike”

Thursday, April 23

Harold And Maude, Ashby 1971 [as of now this is available on Prime]

Another entry in the “I didn’t realize how many movies try to be this one” book. Really funny, and so shockingly dark, I can’t imagine how much people hated this when it first came out and how hard of a sell it would be to try and talk someone into seeing it. Probably what I liked most about it was how earned the sense of finding joy in life is in this movie, considering how cynical it is in depicting the fetishization guys tend to do with the notion of suicide. It’s quirky without being twee (if you want that, I guess go to Rushmore, a movie I adore, but definitely borrows heavily from this, something Anderson wouldn’t ever deny).

Mad Men, “The Benefactor”, “Three Sundays”

Harry Crane’s campaign to be the least liked person in Mad Men, you could argue, starts more-so here than it did in the finale of S1 when he cheats on his wife.

The Plot Against America, “Part 3″

I don’t think anything, Television-wise, has benefited less from the pandemic than TPAA. Of course it would happen to a David Simon show and maybe it’s a good thing, considering how the number of bad takes would greatly outweigh the number of good takes that would come about if there was some more attention on it. 

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Waits With You”, “Joe Pera Guides You Through The Dark”

I can’t remember the last time I laughed as hard as I did when they started demonstrating the different hair styles you can get when getting your hair cut. These episodes have somehow gotten goofier than the first season and it’s, uh, really good.

Friday, April 24

Parks And Recreation, “The Camel”

Top Chef, Season 17 episode 6

Brooklyn Nine-Nine, “Lights Out”

Dan Goor & Luke Del Tredici is to Brooklyn Nine-Nine as Michael Schur & Aisha Muharrar was to Parks And Recreation.

The Beastie Boys Story, Jonze 2020 [available on AppleTV+]

As with any kind of retrospective, there’s a fair amount of yadda-yadda-ing and maybe not everything totally works with this live-documentary, but it’s so deeply Beastie Boys that I can’t help but just be so grateful that it exists. While it’s like a vaudeville symposium it is absolutely doubles as a love letter to a departed friend and immense talent. The worst thing that could happen is that it’ll just make you want to re-listen to the gods.

Mad Men, “The New Girl”, “Maidenform”

I just can’t believe that Chauncey exits the series the same episode that he enters.This was and still remains the turning point of Duck Phillips: terrible human (and kind of when he turns a little cartoonish).

Saturday, April 25

Parks And Recreation, “Hunting Trip”

Mad Men, “The Gold Violin”, “A Night To Remember”, “Six Month Leave”, “The Inheritance”, “The Jet Set”

Quite a run of episodes here for ole Mad Men here. Always love when they remind us that everyone really underestimates Ken Cosgrove (even himself). And as I was watching “Six Month Leave” it kind of hit me that this is an outlier episode of Mad Men. It’s so much of a whole that I find it hard to put one episode above another, but if I needed just an episode of Mad Men to watch at random like a year or so from now, this is one that would really stick out to me. A great farewell to a great Murray brother.

Bad Education, Finley 2019 [available on HBO Now/Go]

It sucks that HBO makes more bad movies than it does good, but when they’re good, man they’re really good. It hits some HBO movie bingo squares which are kind of eye-rolley to me, but all-in-all, this is a really outstanding little movie. It feels weird that it’s taken this long for Ray Romano to start carving out a character actor niche for himself, but I’m just happy we’re finally here! I saw someone compare it to or with Wolf Of Wall Street and as someone not from Long Island I feel confident in saying that they’re a helluva Long Island scum-bag (repetitive?) double feature.

The Plot Against America, “Part 4″

Was really hoping this was going to be the thing that made people remember that Winona is incredible and not Stranger Things, but that’d require like a dozen monkey’s paw wishes that I just don’t have. (What a world it’d be if The Plot Against America adaptation somehow eclipsed Stranger Things in terms of cultural significance) However badly I wanted that though, this has really been Zoe Kazan’s show-a quieter role than Anthony Boyle (who I am also just floored by) but more effective in how much internal processing she’s doing with this character.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Takes You To The Grocery Store”, “Joe Pera Goes To Dave Wojcek’s Bachelor Party With You”