#but i do think it’s good for ppl who haven’t been to every stream to see | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

undetectorist · 2 years

Text

thank you @sanhaoche for the tag! i love to share my many thoughts on things.

Rules: tag 9 ppl you want to know better

Last song: mikrokosmos by BTS. my “BTS favourites” playlist is literally over 7 hours long because they haven’t made a bad song in their lives, but if i had to pick my ultimate favourite it would be mikrokosmos. shine dream smile x

Last show: i think the last tv show i actually finished was i told sunset about you which i watched because the director of this film festival (who i’m obsessed with) was constantly posting about it on instagram and i was like okay king you’ve got me intrigued. i thought it was so beautifully filmed and the yearning was exquisite. all of those longing gazes! when they’re in the hammock and oh-aew says, “i think you know,” i was shaking crying throwing up. i will say that it gets a bit melodramatic and overwrought midway through episode 4—i was watching it with sarah in the room and after 20 minutes she was like they really haven’t stopped crying this entire time, which, like, yeah. however EYE also started crying when teh and hoon have that conversation in the final episode…. what can i say, i love gays and their siblings. anyway it really does capture that first-love-obsession so well, both in its crazy intensity and also in how you catalogue every single small touch and look and moment. plus i got to read this fic after which was so GOOD.

also if this question was meant to be about concerts my last show was ATEEZ which changed my life, restructured my DNA and had me immediately searching for VIP tickets for the berlin and amsterdam shows. seonghwa being visibly affected by my sign and touching his heart???? yunho saying “i love you” directly to sarah???? no we won. there is truly nothing like seeing a band live at the very height of your obsession with them

Currently watching: god so many things.

the bear! very tonally chaotic but enjoyable.

the sopranos, which abeera has been telling me about for ages and we finally watched the first episode on friday and i fear i’m going to be obsessed. seeing tony squirming in the therapist’s chair not wanting to speak about his family…..relate!

kinnporsche because i simply had to know what was driving everyone so crazy. also hayley sent me a unionisation fic and so really watching kp is just background research i have to do so i can read it. anyway i’m 3 episodes in and if anything happens to porsche i will kill everyone in this room and then myself etc etc

Currently reading: i’m going to cheat because the book i’m reading right now isn’t worth talking about but i recently read I HOTEL BY KAREN TEI YAMASHITA which was perfect. i was telling abeera about it yesterday and started stumbling over my words because i was so excited to talk about it. it’s a book of 10 interconnected novellas about the asian american/yellow power movement in the late 60s/70s, based on archival research into the many activist & community groups that were organising in san francisco at the time. it covers SO much ground: from the 68 student strike to the alcatraz occupation to the black panthers to lenin reading groups to the communist art in the coit tower to filipino fruit pickers. i’ve never read a fiction book that understands both marxist theory and praxis so deeply and so well. it’s about community, solidarity, putting your body on the line; poetry and love and art and food; and ultimately it’s about revolutionary struggle and how to dream it and do it. i cried! twice!

Current obsession: do i even need to say ATEEZ? stream guerrilla. the “kpop punk” playlist i have been meticulously curating, which is a list of kpop songs paired with thematically/lyrically similar pop punk songs. the cucumber plants on my balcony. this new LUCY song, which makes me feel like i am a character in a TV show during a montage where i Get My Life Together. a recipe for chicken adobo which is one of the most delicious things i’ve cooked recently. dalton day’s poetry. the moment of the day when It’s Time To BeReal. going bouldering! i just got new climbing shoes which is helping me move up a grade and it’s so satisfying to get stronger! the podcast episode i’m planning with @sanhaoche on mdzs, in which i will inevitably talk about jiang cheng for at least 20 minutes without stopping to breathe. my friends, obviously and always.

tagging @jiminsproof @sportsbrataemin @evakant @perilously @daltoneering @phneltwrites @anakinkendrick @hstylesbians to do this if you would like to!!!!

#sorry this is SO long i have so many thoughts on everything all the time. some might say i should keep a diary but i will never do that #i love talking to people so please message me anytime on any/all of the above!!!!#about

13 notes · View notes

roger-that-cap · 3 years

Text

meet me in the gardens

knight!natasha romanoff x noble!fem!reader

summary: being the widow of a decently wealthy lord and sitting on a large plot of land automatically meant that you were a candidate for the program that you couldn’t say not to; the hosting. you had to sponsor a knight and keep them in your home for an entire year, which was troublesome enough on its own. but you never expected your knight to be a woman, and you certainly didn’t expect to have a full on illegal love affair with her, either.

warnings: ppl are upset, shit gets ruined, swearing? the “l” word

word count: 3.5k

what is this, like the sixth part? this was definitely supposed to be a miniseries lmao- all the other parts are on my pinned post!

The nights passed the same, but the days were entirely different. Days kept flying by, and with every single cycle of the sun, you were forced more and more by tradition to prepare your home for your future husband. It had been days since you and Natasha confessed your feelings for each other and kissed under the starlight, and still, the feeling of her arms around you and her face in your hands still ran around in your mind, pushing thoughts of your duties out of your mind without any effort. And it was for that reason, against your judgement, that you still met with Natasha Romanoff every night.

It felt like ever since the honesty started flowing, you began to feel lighter. With every glance at Natasha that became less and less stolen, your soul felt like it could deviate more and more by the second. Your mind knew what was going on, the high before the impending fall, and you knew for a fact that when you hit the ground, you were going to shatter. But you couldn't find your mind wanting to acknowledge how fragile you were becoming for love. And how could you? How could you mind the chilling fall and the results of it when Natasha cradled you so gently, just like stained glass?

Wanda was the sane one. She was the one who kept trying to bring you back down from the tops of your clouds, attempting to be the gentle reminder before reality itself slammed right into you and took your breath away in the worst of ways. She was the gentle hand of a mother that tried to shake her child out of a nightmare disguised as a dream, and you were the insolent child who ignored her.

Pietro, on the other hand, encouraged it. He was all for splurging, and that went for everything. He was a borderline glutton and when he had money, it was gone within weeks, and he was an advocate for the way that you were divulging in your own little heaven. He would smile when he saw you off in your own head, reminiscing on a memory so sweet you could have sworn it was some sort of dream. He would tell Wanda in hushed whispers to leave you alone, and that you deserved to be happy, even if it was only for a little bit.

“But she doesn’t deserve to have it ripped away from her,” Wanda said to him on a day where the sun managed to pierce through the coverage of the clouds, and he just shook his head at her, looking at her with slight pity. “It’s my duty as her friend to remind her.”

“She’s a smart girl, don’t you think she knows?” Pietro retorted, eyeing you as you picked a magnolia from your garden, standing by yourself but still smiling. “Besides, do you really think that her lady love is going to let anything happen to her?”

Wanda gasped and looked around them, on alert for anyone who could have possibly heard what her brother had said. Her eyes were wild as she watched for anyone who may have heard the scandalous words, and when she saw that everyone was minding their business, she swirled her head back to glare at Pietro. “What?”

Pietro grinned, and then his grin turned into a sneaky smirk. “What, you didn't know?” When Wanda hesitated to answer, he chuckled. ‘There’s no way you didn’t know.”

“Pietro, you can’t just say things like that,” she scolded, heart still racing at the thought of someone knowing.

“You and I are the only ones who know her well enough to know that she’s in love, and there’s no way that you haven’t seen the way that the knight is around her.”

Wanda had. She had a great read on people, always seeming to know everyone’s thoughts before they even knew it themselves. She knew the second that Natasha Romanoff started to change, and she would never forget the time where she realized that it was because of her very own dear friend.

It happened on a particularly cool day, and Wanda had dressed you in a short and flowy dress before realizing that there was a breeze outside. You had walked down to the training areas, even though you said that you were just aimlessly walking, and you kept glancing over your shoulder to watch the red head spar with a man twice her size and hold more than her own. You had looked away the second that Wanda looked at you for a moment too long, with her eyes that were always seeking answers. The first pang of realization hit Wanda that day when she saw you stand up straight and tall when Natasha started to saunter towards the both of you. The second time that she saw it was when Natasha got an eyeful of you, too, and then her flawless steps faltered for the quickest of moments. Natasha never faltered.

“It doesn’t matter what we know,” Wanda muttered lowly, putting a strand of her hair behind her ear in an attempt to look like they were having a normal conversation. “We can’t just go around saying that our lady-”

“Likes women?” He asked, and Wanda immediately started throwing curses his way. “No one ever sees past their own problems here. I can assure you, no one cares if Lady Mirellis likes lying with women.”

“No, but Brock Rumlow will care,” Wanda pointed out. “And he has the ability to make her life miserable. So please, watch your mouth. Or at least care for how loud you run it.”

“They were meant to meet,” Pietro said, his words nearly running into Wanda’s. “They were meant to meet, that much is obvious. I knew it from the second that I saw them look at each other when the redhead stepped out of the carriage.” Wanda looked at him with shock in her eyes as she watched his face flood with smugness, the sort of effortless smile that made people smile back. “What, you didn’t see that coming?” He shook his head and ruffled his sister’s hair, ignoring the angered sounds she made.

“And you say that you’re the observant twin?”

§§

The stream became your hiding place. It was the place that you and Natasha went when it all became too much for you or when she wanted to celebrate getting another step closer to finding herself. You went on good days and bad ones, but at the end of it, you felt at peace. You both ended up forgetting why you went in the first place.

Your toes were in the water, brushing up against a rock every few seconds as the red head practiced wielding her sword absentmindedly behind you, still looking graceful and as smooth as water while she did it. “What’s going to happen when you finish?”

“When I finish what?”

“When you finish your knightly duties, you know, the reason why you came in the first place?” You asked, turning your head to look at her. She had her arm straight out, sword elongating it and was mid-lunge, but her eyes were on you and her forehead had gathered wrinkles. “What’s going to happen?”

She dropped her arm abruptly and frowned. You heard her inhale over the sound of rushing water. “Well, I suppose I have to ride back to the capital.” You knew that. “I’ll be officially knighted there.”

“Are you excited?”

“It’s still a few months away,” Natasha said, and you knew that the statement was more for you than it was for her. “But when the time comes, I’ll be excited.”

You knew she would be. She rose up from nothing to possibly being a woman knighted by the king, something that had never happened before. She was proud of herself, and you were proud of her. She was the perfect knight, honorable and strong, and everything that a person with that title should be. You sat there with your lips shut, hand in hers like it was meant to be that way, and your mind moving at a speed legs couldn’t even hope for.

“Whatever you’re worrying about, darling,” Natasha said, the hand that wasn’t intertwined with you reaching up and brushing against your jaw, fingers caressing your face as she turned your head gently to face her. “Don’t.”

“If only it were that easy.”

“It could be,” she retorted, and her pointer finger brushed over your top lip. “Just stop thinking about it.”

You pursed your lips at her, shaking your head. “You truly do have a man’s brain.”

“Are you going to be able to do it?” She asked out of nowhere, and you stopped tracing her eyebrows with your finger to give her a confused look. “I guess the real question is- are you really going to do it?”

You sighed, your heart already slowly breaking. “Yes.” You said, lacking hesitancy that you felt deeply in your heart. “It won’t matter that I’ll be married to him. I swear it.”

“I believe you.”

“Nothing has to change. We’ll sneak around like we always do, we’ll be fine.”

“Hey,” Natasha said, grabbing your hands as they started to shake. Your eyes were gathering tears with every word that passed through your lips, and she made you focus on her. “I believe you.”

The rest of the night was spent as all the other nights were spent. Silence other than the sounds of nature and each other’s soft breathing. The customary breeze that came and went brushing against your bare legs and Natasha’s clothed ones. Soft touches that ranged from hands to foreheads to each other’s backs. It was so intimate, and you were so alone with her that it truly felt like you two were the only people on the planet. You never felt safer. Seeing Natasha wield a sword or wear her armor had nothing on the security that you felt when she just had you close, where there was nothing but a sliver of air between your two bodies. It was in moments like those, when she held you in her arms and kissed your temple, where you truly felt invincible.

§§

With every passing day, you fell more and more in love with Natasha Romanoff. That much was a given, and you knew that the first night at the stream was going to change your life for forever, but you never expected it to be that hard. And by it, you meant, getting married to someone you would hate just so that you could keep the woman that you loved safe.

And it felt so good to finally use that word, even if it was only in the comforts of your own mind. You loved her. You loved her like you had never loved anyone else, and you had to tell her one day. Your heart sunk to your toes when you realized that the confession would have to be in an empty forest or in your gardens or somewhere else just a s secretive, and that no one would ever find out truly how devoted you were to her. You were never going to be able to tell the world that you loved her, and that was for more reasons than one.

You were going to marry Brock Rumlow the day after he arrived. And that day was hardly even approaching anymore, it was on your doorstep. It was so close, in fact, that you were standing in your wedding gown and crying as you tried it on one last time before the fateful day.

One second, Wanda was doing your corset and fixing the collar on the traditional wedding dress and the next- she was watching you lose your mind. “I really- I can’t do it.” You had a hand over your mouth as you looked up towards the ceiling. You collapsed to the floor despite your chest struggling to expand and catch a breath while the corset constricted. Your hands covered your face as you allowed yourself to have a good cry for the first time in what felt like years.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Wanda breathed out, and you could feel the heartbreak in her just like it was in you. “I know. I know, just cry it all out.”

Your head was spinning. You had no idea what terrible choices you had made for life to bring you to the spot that you were soon to arrive at and be stuck in forever. You had no idea what you had done to the world to make the universe want to make your life miserable. “I can’t do it.”

“If you’re afraid that he’ll hurt you…” Wanda started off, a slight tremble in her voice as she tried to gather her own bearings and be strong for you, “Pietro and I won’t let it happen. Pietro is strong, and I’m fierce when it comes to the two of you, you know that. Nothing will ever happen to you while we’re here.”

“I can’t marry him,” you sobbed, and it felt like you were being crushed into a hug by the corset. “I can’t.”

“I will be with you every step of the way, just like I was before, darling.”

“No!” You wailed, and you felt Wanda startle a bit. You were going in circles in your own mind, s fast that you couldn’t even stop your lips from moving if you had tried. “I can’t- I cannot marry him because my heart is fully in the possession of another.” You admitted lowly, so quietly that Wanda hardly even heard it. “I can’t.”

Wanda waited a few moments before speaking again. “It’s Natasha isn’t it?”

You stiffened up immediately, almost forgetting that quickly that you had shared the only secret that you ever kept from Wanda. Natasha. “What?”

“Pietro and I have known you for what feels like centuries,” Wanda said rubbing a smooth hand up and down your back. “Did you really think that we hadn’t caught on?”

You looked up at her, panic manifesting in your eyes. “Who else knows?” If you were in a rational state of mind, you would have known that Wanda and Pietro would never run their mouths, especially not about something that meant life or death. And you being with someone- a woman at that- before your betrothed came? That meant certain death for the both of you. ‘W-Wanda-”

“No one knows,” she said soothingly, a promise deep rooted in her tone. “Just the two of us. You hid it surprisingly well, but you can’t hide from your family.”

And they were family. The only ones you considered to be family, actually. “So now you know why.” Wanda nodded, and then the two of you sat on your wooden floor in silence, but it felt awfully loud with the thoughts running through you.

It felt like ages had passed by the time Wanda’s voice flooded your senses again, the despair in it hardly hidden. “What are you going to do?”

“Try to keep us both alive.”

§§

Your eyes were shut as you laid on your back and tried to will the tears away. Natasha was next to you, and you were supposed to be stargazing during your last night of freedom. You had been keeping it together, but the second Natasha heard a sniffle, she shook her head and leaned up on her arm.

“You are not going to mope on our last- you know what? You’re just not going to mope tonight. Stand up.” Before you could even tell her that you didn’t want to she was yanking you up with one hand. You stumbled forward and into her arms, unable to stop yourself from giggling a bit before she steadied you.

The moonlight was your friend as it lit her face, and like you always did, you momentarily lost your breath while the two of you locked eyes, yours clashing with her blue ones and creating a tension that you were so familiar with, the kind that everyone craved. “If there was no rush, nothing threatening to tear us apart, would you agree to marry me right now?”

You blinked. “What?”

“In another life,” Natasha said, and you nodded with hesitant encouragement. “If this was another life and I was someone in a position to get down on one knee and marry you, would you tell me yes?” You stood there tongue tied, holding both of her hands as she stared at you head on. “If I were a man, a wealthy man who loved you for you, just like I do now, would you tell me yes? Would you agree to marry me if there were no obstacles?”

Once you understood the depth of her question, the answer that had been stirring within finally came to light, and then it was leaving your lips in a surprised exhalation. “Yes.”

“Good,” Natasha said, the apprehension melting off of her face. She took a step back, but still held your hands tightly. “I’ll make it a point to find you in the next life, then.”

The next life. An unknown. Something that had so many variables, so many different meanings and outcomes. She was so optimistic, for someone who had seen so much hurt and suffering. But you were a realist, you had to be after everything that happened to you. And you knew deep down, no matter how much you willed for there to be one, that there was no second chance at a next life for you. And there wasn’t one for her, either. You didn’t have the next life. You didn’t even have the one you lived in. But you had a single night.

“I would marry you tonight,” you said softly, and when you heard her breathing hitch, you turned your head to look at her, watching the slightest of flushes appear on her cheeks, like she was surprised that you would have even said the words that you did. “Even with everything going on right now, I would marry you. I would marry you with or without the people who hate us for loving who we do, and with or without Brock Rumlow coming in the morning. If I could, I would marry you. If you’d have me, of course.”

“Of course I would,” she said, relief lacing in her voice as she touched your face, and one of your tears hit her pointer finger. “And it’s too late now, I’m afraid, but, I love you,” she said, and just like that, all of your worry and frustration and fear had melted away, like you were in some stupid fairy tale that queens tell their daughters at night. “Is that enough?”

No. It wasn’t. Not when it came to her. You wanted to give your all to her and you wanted it back from her. But as quick as you realized that you wanted it all, you realized that you would never get it. So, the little confessions and hugs and caresses in the dark were going to have to be enough. You would make them enough. “It’s enough,” you said, because wanting was enough. Being with her in the night and desiring for her during the day was enough. “It’s enough.”

§§

You expected a more calm entrance from Lord Rumlow, but then again, you didn’t know him. But the second all of his horses and men came barreling down the road, you felt like you knew him quite enough.

You knew all men like him at first glance.

Wanda was on your left, and Pietro on your right as you stood in a pretty, floral dress that Wanda picked out for you. It was silent when she dressed you, but all the words were there. She did your hair the way that you usually did it, said you looked beautiful, and then the next thing you knew, you were standing and watching carriages arrive.

Natasha wasn’t there.

You honestly didn’t know if it was worse or better for you.

When the fanfare was finally over and the door to the grandest chariot of them all opened, you held your breath. And then, before you could even stop yourself, you thought, I’m about to see what a true monster looks like.

He was a big man. Muscular, sturdy looking, and intimidating. You immediately understood why he came off as so hostile in the letters, and it was because he was so scary looking that he could get away with nearly anything. You tilted your head upwards in defiance, meeting his eyes even though he cocked a brow at you, easily recognizing you as his betrothed, and as a woman who was directly challenging him.

He took a few steps closer, but like he knew of your extreme aversion to him and the way that you had two people beside you that would defend you fiercely, he stopped at a far enough distance. His expensive shoes dug up your grass, and you would have flinched if it weren’t for his steely, self assured voice coming your way. “You must be my wife.”

You couldn’t even scoff. “Not yet.”

“But tomorrow is coming,” he said, looking around the estate, clearly pleased with the way it looked. He nodded his head once, twice, and then three times, before his gaze settled on you again, and he looked you up and down. “Couldn’t ask for anything more.

***

it literally astonishes me that this was supposed to be four chapters long, at most. but then again, it was supposed to be a fucking one shot just like all the flowers will bloom- so why am i surprised? i can’t write none shots for shit guys...

please like and reblog if you liked this lil installment! i hope you guys have a great rest of your day/night :))))

taglist!

@teenwonder @msmarvelsmain @saamwilscn @procrastinatingsapphictrash @fayhar @8plasma @slut-for-nat @dontmindmejustreading @swords-are-cool @200605chaeng @thescottishavenger @antidaytime @jenny-song @madamevirgo @natasha-danvers @blackxwidowsxwife @shycucumbersandwich @dailyavengering

@xxxtwilightaxelxxx @ima-gi--na-tion @chickenhavewisdom

i’m pretty sure i didn’t forget anyone, and if i did, i’m sorry!

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha x female reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x female reader #knight!natasha #royalty au #natasha romanov fluff #marvel au #lgbt marvel #gay marvel fic #my fics #natasha x fem!reader

191 notes · View notes

marimopeace · 3 years

Text

d. gray-man still fucks me up...

in the best of ways, even after all these years plus breaks on my end as a fan and hoshino's circumstances.

loved all things gothic and fantasy in middle school to escape my life via power-wielding teens (i.e. 07-ghost, pandora hearts, soul eater, karneval, hakkenden, etc.) and d.gray-man was huge for me since i was still in a phase where i was binging all the long anime series i could since it gave my attn span something to latch onto and be immersed in for a good amount of time. tbh i can't tell if my attn span has gotten even shorter considering i usually substitute streaming social media videos over tv nowadays or better since i'm able to better sustain interests in specific niche things?

i switched to consuming content on a more seasonal basis in high school but i became more of a manga reader so at the time i was still on the nose for the rare new d.gray-man chapter. i was so excited for when hallow was announced! i think the hallow promo visuals + posters were some of the last things i shared on my old tumblr blog actually lmao. didn't love hallow as a show but i loved it for what it brought back to me in terms of bringing hoshino's drawings to life via sound + color and seeing ppl turn into fans via gifs in comment sections. that's part of the reason why the furuba reboot meant a lot to me too tbh! always so nice when you can see new and old fans come together to show artists the love they deserve <3

took a break from d.gray-man specifically since the searching for a.w. arc was just a lot for me to take in chapter by chapter since it was hard to keep track of intricate plot details without needing to re-read some chapters for every release and that's not how i enjoy content personally. and i guess from there life just kind of ? came and went? college + growing up in general with new life obligations have changed the way i pursue entertainment aha.

i don't know what switched it on but i ended up spending this past weekend going through everything from scratch! i haven't sat down to marathon 100+ chapters/episodes of anything in a long time since i either keep up with shorter serials now or keep up with things on a monthly basis and wowwww the immersion hit different this time fr XD i swear i felt like a kid again!

but wow going through the entire manga + anime bit by bit from my new position in life really made me appreciate hoshino's storytelling a lot more; it's not so much that the plot of d.gray-man aged well, but that the whole series works together to tell one of the most cohesive stories i've seen for a fantasy shonen (esp with such a young protagonist--allen is the age of a high school sophomore!!!!!! a literal child!!!! someone be on his side kthxJohnny).

when i say i went through bit by bit i MEAN IT i fully had a list of episodes via wikipedia out and i was going through chapter arcs as they were recreated in the old anime series i went in completely XD god i'm crazy.

but it felt so sweet and so wonderful to dive into the adventure head-on.

i'm trying to do the same with the hallow sequel but reading/watching d.gray-man like this is really making me see how rushed it was ^^; it's taking more chapters to get to where each episode of hallow ends and i get why hoshino was so peeved with both shows now to be honest for the out of order details or skipping of content.

i'm also really resonating with hoshino's anger towards TMS for the hallow promo materials and i get why she went as far as to shoot their bank accounts in the foot bc the way i started tearing up during hallow episode 6 with talk of the lotus, flashbacks, and the hand reaching up to the sky....ㅠㅠ #bigoop

kanda shouldn't have been shoved into a yaoi narrative for the sake of money (nor allen esp considering his age) since it completely goes against his character arc and everything he is with alma. i'm getting so fucked up by their past lives' love story and their current again like when i say the tears i'm shedding come from something so old and deep inside of me ㅠㅠ (oh lorde it's so sad!!)

i had to pause my marathon since i spent my monday without wifi bc of a storm in my area and it'll prob be a while until i can finish re-reading/watching until the end of hallow. i'm excited to read new saying goodbye to a.w chapters though! i know it'll definitely be worth waiting these past few years <3 seeing allen's character growth as he matured as a "destroyer who saves" and how he grapples w mana's influence is fascinating and exploring the nitty-gritty of the morality that pervades the Black Order is just! ugh love this kind of worldbuilding with strong characters sm

planning this next content binge will be tricky though since i meant to catch up on the furuba reboot before it ends next week...welp i'll see how this goes ^^;

// time to get to writing this thesis marimo! //

46 notes · View notes

save-the-spiral · 3 years

Note

PLS PLS LIST THE SWAPS!! TELL ME ABOUT THE SIBLINGS AND ALSO HIFUMI BECAUSE I LOVE HIM (IF YOU WANT!) I will also send more questions in the morning too, excited to see what you’ve been working on!!

OK OK OK !!!!! AHH! So, before assigning talents, I swapped the pools, so for the first game, I use the talents from the second game, and vis versa! For some i listed gender, sexuality, or neurodivergencies, though this isn’t all of them, and I haven’t developed them all to the same level!

This is SO long. I didn’t even bother mentioning things like my plans for the killing games. (I have DR1 planned out in full, but only parts of DR2 and the v3 anime)

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK MY HEART SKIPPED A BEAT IN HAPPINESS WHEN I SAW I HAD NEW ASK NOTIFS!!

LIST:

Trigger Happy Havoc (first game)

Kyoko Kirigiri- Ultimate Luckster- Mastermind (: Sometimes lesbians can be evil okay! was trained as a detective like everyone in her family and didn’t get the ultimate :) she’s definitely not mad about that :) her luck cycle depends on how far she plans things ahead. her good luck is when she’s spontaneous! She hates when ‘normal’ people are accepted by ultimates.

Makoto Naegi- Photographer (Mostly wildlife and nature photography, with Sayaka helping him for some animal photography (: trans and bi <3 One of sayaka’s birds nests in his hair like all the time)

Kiyotaka Ishimaru- Ultimate Swordsman (AUTISTIC ICON, has trained in kendo since he was a kid, then was essentially given away to the Fujisaki clan by his very stressed dad. Semiverbal, rarely speaks.)

Chihiro Fujisaki- Ultimate Yakuza (Taka is her bodyguard! His family is in debt to hers, the Fujisaki clan is the most powerful in Japan. trans icon, of course, dates Sayaka! Very direct, though she’s far more delicate and polite when talking to taka, her best friend)

Sakura Oogami- Ultimate Nurse (Works as an EMT- her clan still is in martial arts, so she’s still very buff, she assists in injuries at the family dojo. Autistic Icon)

Asahina Aoi- Ultimate Gamer (ULTIMATE ADHD. streams and has a ton of fun, will ramble while breaking records, demigirl who loves her girlfriend sakura :)

Mukuro Ikusaba- Ultimate Chef (Works best with ‘cheap’ food, and making them taste good. a byproduct of growing up on the streets with junko, and junko being bored of the same old food they dug out of the trash. now works closely with junko for her teams’ nutritional needs! autistic and sapphic.)

Junko Enoshima- Ultimate Team Manager (there are SO many sports she can never get bored, and the professional scene is always changing! prefers coaching womens’ teams, because being an ultimate brings them more publicity and usually higher pay :)

Mondo Oowada- Ultimate Prince (OH MY BOY. trans adhd icon. now the crown prince of Novoselic, with a reagent in his place until he comes of age. His service dog Chuck is a maltese and an absolute sweetheart. Chihiro takes him under her wing to teach leadership. also dates taka later OF COURSE, though they’re poly and I may add more ppl to their relationship later.)

Celestia Ludenburg- Ultimate Musician (specializes in violin, most strings, though she can play any instrument. grew up poor, dedicated herself to an instrument and persona to cope)

Byakuya Togami- Ultimate Musician (Yep. two musicians. two catty trans gay icons about to throw down. they HATE each other and grew up as rivals. specialize in classical, they literally tore a professional orchestra full of grown adults apart trying to make them side with who was the best musician. they’re so good that they’re matched, and Hope’s Peak accepts them as one student and combined ultimate. they room together. they fight. Literally if one of them gets expelled, the other does too, so they’re STUCK. eventually they become literally inseparable and insufferable together like the WORST siblings. I love them.)

Sayaka Maizono- Breeder (animal handler) (Specializes in birds!!!!!! has songbirds on her shoulders all the time. will give unsettling animal facts without realizing they’re unsettling. sends her songbirds to serenade chihiro when they start dating <3)

Yasuhiro Hagakure- Gymnast (you see this tall goof who acts like an older brother to everyone and wonder HOW he’s a gymnast. he’s completely different in competitions, though still lighthearted. becomes a big brother figure to mukuro and junko especially <3 also trans bc i say so.)

Leon Kuwata- Traditional Dancer (he just. kinda hates it. it takes SO much work and effort but he takes to it naturally. his cousin kanon is NOT like in canon, instead she’s helpful. he’d literally rather be doing anything else. doesn’t know how to do anything like... basic either. can’t cook. cant do his own laundry. everything was dedicated to traditional japanese dancing before he attended HPA.)

Toko Fukawa- Engineer (writes schematics and is very good at it. gets VERY upset when her plans go wrong. her notes are orderly and perfect. host for their system!)

Syo- Mechanic (a factive of genocider syo, NOT an actual killer. she’s a protector mainly, and also is more adept at hands on skills when it comes to fixing things, her hands are less shaky. Her notes are a disaster and she does it to spite Toko.)

Hifumi Yamada- (???) (reserve course) Protagonist! My BOY. HIFUMI IS GOOD OKAY. He’s autistic and loves anime and gaming! he’s not particularly ultimate-leveled at them, or anything else! Attending Hope’s Peak as a reserve course student! At one point he joins the student council as a reserve course representative even if he’s only a freshman :) He’s also a moderator in Hina’s livestream chat, under the username of JusticeHammer, fastest ban hammer this side of the internet. He's internet friends with hina and sakura, and doesn’t realize Oh We Go To the same SCHOOL until he bumps into them. and realizes hina doesnt know what he looks like. but sakura does. its hilarious. he’s aroace, and during the year they’re locked in HPA, is in a queer platonic partnership with Hina and Sakura, while they’re dating each other. it’s great.)

Goodbye Despair! (second game)

Peko Pekoyama- Lucky student (ohohoh. her luck relies on her conviction. if she has doubts her bad luck strikes HARD. trans!, was taken in by Fuyuhiko’s family when she was a baby, grew up as just another kid in the family. They all expected Fuyu to go off to HPA on his own and then BOOM acceptance letter)

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu- Programmer (He. gets so angry while coding. He has an array of rubber ducks to talk to and work through his coding issues with. trans of course. Very protective of Peko when people say she doesn’t have a ‘real’ ultimate. ADHD and Autistic)

Sonia Nevermind- Writer (Literary Girl) (Her family immigrated to Japan when she was young! She writes a lot of serial killer novels, murder mysteries and horror and all that! Trans and bi :)

Gundham Tanaka- Detective (YEAH my guy is a detective. still talks Like That. Trans and bi and he and Sonia were kinda-dating (t4t autistic power couple in the making) when things started happening. He spends some time with his cool older sister who he looks up to a LOT. He and Sonia talk through things together a lot, they both have those red string walls, one for murder cases, another for a fictional plot lmao.)

Mahiru Koizumi- Moral Compass (my GIRL. autistic. Her morals rely a lot on people taking responsibility and being reliable, and she ends up having to work through some biases she didn’t realize she had when she arrived at HPA. Is still protective of Hiyoko, though that protectiveness is spread a bit thinner to extend to the rest of the class.)

Hiyoko Saionji- Clairvoyant!!! (HI YES I COULD TALK ABOUT HER FOR DAYS. Has actual visions in dreams and when she suddenly faints, but doesn’t really realize they’re uhh Real Visions for a WHILE. uses her status as an ultimate clairvoyant to trick and bully kids when in school for a LONG time, though her homelife wasn’t great with her grandmother trying to find ways to make her visions more consistent. SHES ALSO 12 WHEN SHE JOINS THE 77TH CLASS. she’s just so advanced in academics and her ultimate is so interesting hope’s peak cant HELP but scout her early. she has SO many issues guys no one appreciates hiyoko enough, autistic gifted kid hiyoko my beloved.)

Akane Owari- Gambler (started gambling to help out her family and Got Good at it. is very very conscious of money and food like all the time. Runs the hope’s peak betting pools once she arrives. these ultimates bet on a lot of things. she ALWAYS wins. until she doesnt!!!)

Mikan Tsumiki- Martial Artist (ohhhh Mikan. Still anxious and clumsy (though not like THAT in canon) and literally no one looks at her and thinks Oh The ULTIMATE martial artist?? it isn’t until you see her in the ring that you understand. She started learning self defense as a kid because her (bad) parents essentially said she had to rely on and protect herself and no one else would help.)

Kazuichi Souda- Pop Idol (OH TRANS ICON? he’s nervous and paranoid about Everything still, though now it’s like. oh the entire world is always watching my every move this is Okay (: has the brightest neon album eras. he literally keeps up a like. weird chad persona when interacting with people because he’s masking how hard he’s constantly just internally screaming.)

Nagito Komaeda- Soldier (AHAHAH my mans got issues problems disorder he’s a messssss, this trans guy, this absolute gay. this boy leveled a city of thousands of people with his own hands and some bombs. Still has medical issues, but most of his like. treatments and medicine is hold hostage as long as he stays in line. believes the ends justify the means and anyone who dies to him is obviously weak, because look at him! he’s weak, but that doesn’t matter because he doesn’t have to be the strongest, he just has to be stronger than the weakest scum.)

Chiaki Nanami- Heir (OOF. Agender, uses any pronouns. Doesn’t really. enjoy being the heir. grew up with Byakuya in the same circles. she treats the economy and stock market and stuff like games. enjoys gaming but isn’t good at them. collects so many things. has halls full of collections. Her parents stopped controlling her once she was able to prove she had more money than them and could literally bankrupt them if she wanted.)

Hajime Hinata- Baseball Star (Chiaki’s best friend, his family was upper middle class until he hit it BIG as a baseball star. wants to do BIG things and wants to attend hope’s peak more than anything!! Doesn’t really think of baseball as his THING, just a means to an end! trans :)

Teruteru Hanamura- Biker Gang Leader (started with shaking down some jerks who didn’t pay their food and drink tabs at his mama’s restaurant. now he RUNS their tiny town. His siblings are essentially gang mascots, he works hard to keep them out of trouble (while bringing them to like. meetings where he ends up beating a dude almost to death. its fine). most of what he does it to get more money to keep the restaurant afloat and care for his mama with her health conditions.)

Nekomaru Nidai- Fashionista (the drama. the CHAOS. most people are like ohhh we can never understand this artistic genius when he’s literally just. vibing and has ADHD and a love for coffee. Works a lot on accessible clothing lines for disabled people! Also he and Kazuichi work together sometimes, Nekomaru is good at calming Kaz down and seeing like, the root of whatever problem and making it better. ALSO A TRANS ICON and just flaunts it.)

Imposter- In the hope’s peak days they are impersonating Ryota Mitarai, as a part of the 77th class. In the Killing Game they impersonate Mondo Oowada as the Ultimate Prince. They’re doin’ their best.

Ibuki Mioda- (???) (Izuru Kamakura) Protagonist! Gundham Tanaka’s older sister (though they’re in the same school year). Nonbinary and using just. an array of pronouns alongside she/her, and jokingly fights with gundham for neopronouns like MOM said it’s MY TURN on the rawrself pronouns. She attends the reserve course to stay at her brother’s side. She dresses loudly and acts even louder because !!! she wants to stand out!! in the middle of this drab reserve course hell!! but when things go down, she wants to be someone, to be worthy of being her amazing brother’s big sister. so she accepts some offers.

NON-KILLING GAME:

Ryota Mitarai- Ultimate Analyst (stays in his room. He’s terrified of the outside world but fascinated by it. watches hope’s peak academy through security feeds, picking up on little details. he just wants to understand things but never looks at the big picture.)

Chisa Yukizome- Ultimate Boxer (Homeroom teacher!! She’s working really hard and believes in everyone! Some are intimidated by talent, but she’s never hurt anyone outside of the ring! Dating Kyosuke)

Juzo Sakakura- Ultimate Student Council President (Has anger issues, though his work at reigning them in assisted in becoming an Ultimate. Was responsible for security and the Hope’s Peak student council. Dating Kyosuke)

Kyosuke Munakata- Ultimate Housekeeper (Meticulous, works himself to the BONE even if he’s good enough to not have to do that. Is working on establishing another Hope’s Peak! Dating Chisa and Jozu!!!)

Seiko Kimura- Ultimate Blacksmith (GIVE MY GIRL KNIVES!! She’s an anxious gal, always wearing a facemask that filters the air in her forge because she has some respiratory problems. she prefers making more decorative pieces like an artist, but sometimes can create utilitarian pieces or tools to fit specific needs. Still a doormat)

Ruruka Ando- Ultimate Pharmacist (She constantly asks Seiko for new tools for her developments in medicine, saying its all for the advancement of humanity, so Seiko denying any request is SELFISH, though she never thinks to make anything for seiko’s health issues. Dating Izayoi. Specializes in medicine for mental health. Not Doing Great :)

Sonosuke Izayoi- Ultimate Confectioner (He loves sweets. LOVES them. Creates things that look plain, ordinary. but taste so GOOD you CRY and maybe ascend for a little bit. sometimes Ando makes cool new drugs to put in the sweets, who knows! It’s a mystery! He always has like. a huge refrigerated case of fresh cakes, and constantly has a lollipop in his own specialty recipe in his mouth.)

#ask #former-champion #danganronpa #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #super danganronpa 2 #I could tag every character but consider this: ITS 3 AM IT TOOK ME OVER AN HOUR TO WRITE THIS #not wizzy #dangan ronpa

36 notes · View notes

morkofday · 3 years

Note

Now that this hell year is almost over let’s celebrate the good things! If you’re receiving this it means you have made someone’s year better. Tell who on tumblr has made this year better for you (as many people as you like, it can be something as small as liking your posts or sending something sweet) and share some of the content you’ve enjoyed (your own or others)

thank you so much dear anon! ♥ I am happy to know that I’ve managed to make someone’s year at least a tiny bit better :’) as a year on tumblr, this year has been very special to me personally so am happy to know that someone has felt that too!

this is going to be a huge list so be warned! putting it under the cut bc of that~

@i-am-just-a-kiddo you are and will always be on this list first and foremost. you and our friendship is the best thing I have gotten from this hellsite and I continue being thankful for it ♥ I always have so much fun talking to you, you support me so unconditionally, share things with me and allow me to just yell about things every day! you never get bored of that endless stream of random nonsense I pour on you and it means so much to me ♥ I also feel honored to share your things, to see your paintings and read your writings and just be there for you. let’s hope the next year will be kinder to us and the world in general! and hey, maybe you get into guardian at some point heh (and thank you for getting into so many things with me this year already!)

@leonzhng I think I said this at some point too but you were the reason why I got into this community we have going on with @mdzsnet and gave me the confidence to just approach ppl here and love things together ♥ you are always so sweet and kind and lovable and I appreciate you doing all the things you do. your edits are amazing and inspirational and I love all the tag games we keep throwing around :’D

@ashenwren you!! you are amazing and I’m so happy to have gotten to know you through our network :’) I am excited every day when I get to talk to you, even if it’s just for a moment as our timezones make everything kind of difficult :’D it’s just so nice to share mdzs and dmbj with you, to help you get into these dramas, to share all these ideas and thoughts we have, to share our different cultures and languages and whatnot. you are always so supportive and excited and kind and I wish I could hug you sometimes! I hope I still can write something more for pingxie and that I get to see a ton of your art! ♥

then to all the wonderful ppl in our network who have made my tumblr experience so wonderful this year, who keep being kind and amazing and full of so much talent! to @manhasetardis @aheartfullofjolllly @bees0are0awesome @highwarlockkareena @yibobibo @linglynz @yiqiie @wangxiians @leoyunxi @tiesanjiao @lan-xichens @oneautumnfox @aowyn @wangxianbunnydoodles @weiwuxcian and many others who I might have forgotten: I enjoy seeing you in my notes so much, I enjoy all of your content, seeing us all interact with each other and just being very friendly and welcoming ♥ I am thankful every day that I got to join this network and learn to know so many! continue being awesome and have a nice upcoming year :’)

then quickly to:

@lzswy thank you for loving my music and wanting to know me! I hope we get to talk some more and feel free to push music my way too, am always ready to drown in songs :’)

@kholran thank you for doing my tag games and allowing me to talk to you, to call you my friend, and share my love for liu sang! I will once again tell you that your fic (link here if anyone reading this is interested) was amazing and I hope we get to talk some more!

and then thank you to all the ppl who I see in my notes all the time and leave amazing tags and just love me with interacting with my content and sometimes making it more known and just giving it their all: @btssjamss @a-force-dyad-in-space @cuppyhands @mylastbraincql @drwcn @fytheuntamed @distantsnows @brutalbeetle @intimisky @kazaore @inessencedevided @bluebelle88 @actualmichelle @sassyassassy @thebeautifulmacabre @merinnan @inkblue-black and many others who I might not recognize or remember or find right now! or who I have already mentioned in the network part bc you guys are awesome like that :’) especially when I have tried out new things this year and have dipped into new fandoms and reached out of this mdzs pit I am still in and unwilling to leave ♥ but you are still there and like my content haha

and then I want to mention some of my favorite works this year (I’ll try to pick one per month from my archives oh boy):

@i-am-just-a-kiddo‘s amazing niemo fic that owns my heart, soul, and the never to be born firstborn ♥

@bloody-bee-tea‘s amazing mdzs related fics that always just make my heart clench but also bring me so much joy!

this amazing wangxian edit that still shatters me

this amazing wwx edit by hanyi ♥ @leonzhng I love the quote in this and this breaks me in all the best ways!

@fytheuntamed‘s whole the untamed memes series that single-handedly has saved this year for me (tho I suppose this started earlier than this year but who cares, quality content either way)

this jc outfits collection post by @linglynz ♥ everything for my am-a-hoe-for-the-angry-purple-guy -needs

this amazing art by @/hana-tox that still gives me so many feels that I feel like bursting

this stunning edit set for the best album that dropped this year, map of the soul: 7, by @/kassareo

this wangxian edit that inspired me a lot and still makes me catch my breath bc damn that looks gorgeous (by @/itsazbitch)

another very inspirational edit set by @/sammyholdsacandle (some might recognize which one of my edits got inspired by this a lot lol)

this very beautiful post by @alienwlw that’s really just goals tbh

@sarawatsaraleo‘s favorite the untamed scenes series, every one of these edits is a huge joy and so beautifully done! ♥

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful, wonderful wangxian edit that keeps being my one of my favorites ever and just. inspires me to this day, I hope one day I can gif :’D ♥

another one of my absolute favorites is this edit by hanyi again ♥ you just have the best ideas and you make everything so pretty!

this soft but heartbreaking, delicate but so emotional edit by @gusucloud ♥ I think I’ve never loved an edit this much, it’s so pretty and absolutely perfect!

this edit by @highwarlockkareena bc wth, the coloring? the gifs themselves?? gosh it looks so pretty and I might cry

@tiesanjiao‘s wonderful gifset made for the gif challenge that was going around during this time ;; as I was slowly falling in love with the iron triangle and dmbj in general, this felt like a blessing ♥

these absolutely stunning pieces of art by @/tiphs

this absolutely gorgeous post for wwx’s bday by @alienwlw (all of this is just. perfect?? the colors, the gifs, the scenes... everything!)

this gorgeous edit by @distantsnows that makes me smile and cry at the same time ♥

this edit also by @distantsnows that is just. pure perfection?? bc fuck yes, sect leader jaing yanli!! I love you for this one

this edit by @lanzhansmiles bc the colors are just absolutely stunning and I love how they both sit there like that and just? wow

this edit just makes me feel so many things and just looks so dreamy by @cescedes

this adorable but also very painful edit by @manhasetardis ♥ I love all about this one :’)

and as a shameless self-promo (bc apparently I haven’t done enough of that lol) I want to mention my wu xie edit which was just so much fun to do and turned out so great and. I just love him a lot ok, he’s a wonderful character and zhu yilong played him so well ♥

I wish you all – all the ppl mentioned here and all who see this and all who still do not – a very merry christmas, happy holidays, and happy new years too! I hope the year 2021 will treat us all well and that you will remain as amazing, lovely, and wonderful as you all have been! ♥

#mdzsnet #(am gonna tag that sry)#thank you to all of you!!#and so much love #and i feel like i forgot a ton but #here we go #about me #random

64 notes · View notes

ennui-gt · 3 years

Text

Here it is. A Piece Of Borrower Content Written Entirely In Stream Of Consciousness:

AN: so this is incomplete and very…needs revisions to the timeline to incorporate some things I added later! It’s the original universe that Mira’s from! I edited it like Slightly to just change Ross’s name to Ross (if u see Max anywhere that’s his old one I just felt like changing it so that’s just him but different. Anyway) Everything's under the readmore tab, cheers!

The Library Fairy:

Basic Plot (Chrono, comic starts from human perspective abt the ‘legend of the library fairy’ ig maybe. Nothing here is permanent cept the characterization)

Part A

1- Mira is borrower currently chillin in a college library

2- She lives off of the cafe on the second floor nd reads lots and lots of stuff about everything when the upper floors close (lower floor open 24/7 but upper floors r vacant p much after 12:00 AM)

3- she starts getting increasingly curious about human stuff cos she’s literate nd books r pry neat

4- it starts one night when she spots an unattended notebook and a half eaten blueberry muffin, nd it’s 12:30 so nobody’s coming back in atm (it’s the 80s so no laptops for the plebians quite yet)

5- so she goes ‘welp’ nd takes part of the muffin, then sees the work on the page and goes ‘hmmmm this is incorrect’ so she helps our and leaves notes here n there to point the kid in the right direction and puts down some book refs for further study bcos at this point she’s been there for 2 years and she knows where most things are

6- she stays behind to see if the human comes back for it, hidden in a hidey hole near the desk

7- human comes in, sees notebook, practically melts w relief nd stuffs it in his bag

8- next day human comes back nd leaves nother notebook and a cookie, along w a hidden camera

9- Mira goes ‘o boy, this a trap, innit’

10- Mira then decides ‘eh whatever I haven’t had contact w anyone in years now so I might as well’

11- she steals the camera film nd leaves a lil scrap of paper saying ‘nice try ;)’ on it

12- student comes back, sees paper, goes ‘dammit’, then leaves note addressed to the ‘library fairy’ and another cookie, as well as more of their work for her to help with

13- bout a decade goes by and now the “Library Fairy” is an urban myth, it’s currently 2003 so she’s also wound up on the school’s unofficial Wikipedia page under ‘local cryptids’

14- most library employees know of her but they don’t go looking out of fear stemming from superstitions bout her, somehow the legend grew from ‘can’t be photographed’ to ‘a student once saw her and died that day’

15- there’s now a small shrine devoted to her where ppl bring offerings hoping to get good grades in return, sometimes they will leave papers for her to proofread nd stuff

16- new prof (named Alexei) finds online article thinks he Knows What’s Up bcos he had a borrower friend as a kid, but they left when borrower’s fam found out about them knowing each other

17- he leaves note wedged in one of her secret entrances behind outlet, asking if she can meet w him at some point

18- Mira, already In it, goes ‘Okay. Alright. This has gone on for long enough. Time to go and never return’ but ofc she’s curious as all hell and like she decides she will at least honor the guy’s request for a convo b4 she goes, but on her terms and w/o speaking face 2 face

19- they Talk in the library after hours, bcos he paid off the janitor to let him stay after hours nd most of the student employees recognize him as a prof nd leave him alone

20- they talk again for every subsequent night

21- she uhhhh finally decides to reveal herself nd prays that her hunch was right nd he won’t try to grab her or anything

22- he doesn’t but she’s nervous so she winds up gettin caught in her own climbing rope like idiot, is now dangling from ceiling in tangled mess

23- he stifles chuckle nd she says smthn sarcastic

24- he moves closer and offers to untangle her

25- she’s like ‘please’

26- so he do, but her grip on the rope slips nd he has to catch her

26- so now she’s in his hand and he just sets her down and now he’s a bumbling embarrassed mess bcos he said he wasn’t going to hold her and he just did and o dear pls forgib him

28- nd she’s like ‘dude u just saved my life it’s fine ur fine chill’

29- internally she’s going HOLY FUCK AAAAAAA but externally, her human’s already worked up enough as it is so she’s gotta b the level headed one

29.5- after a while they both kinda get used to each other more, he gets tenure, they celebrate, some more stuff happens, Aleksei got married (not to Mira, Mira hasn’t actually rly thought about being in a relationship w anyone cos she’s laser focused on gaining as much knowledge as possible)

30- eventually Alexei’s like ‘hey so I’m dean of faculty for the biotech branch now uhhhh would u like actual job teaching students? Cos, uh, you can do it remotely thru online lectures n stuff, no in person interaction, and I uh was just kinda wondering—‘

31- she’s like ‘yes. Yes!!! LET ME HELP PEOPLE OFFICIALLY KINDA’

32- so now she’s a professor, and has revealed her Secret a few times here n there to a number of the faculty, nd she has recorded her own findings in a personal journal

33- ‘humans will treat u like a human if they think ur human first. The kids call it ‘catfishing’’

34- enter Ross, an mall goth who accidentally tripped headfirst into a premed program

35- Mira’s favorite field of study is bio so naturally she’s his prof for a majority of his classes

36- being the good boy that he is, he now knows Mira’s secret. There is an Entire Chapter on him finding out and legit just continuing their conversation as if everything was normal bcos he thought that was how he was supposed to handle the situation

37- then she says ‘u can ask questions, u know’ he’s like OH THANK FUCK CAUSE I HAVE SEVEN HUNDRED OF THOSE

38- and now he kinda knows what to look for in terms of ‘do borrowers live here check yes or no’

39-in his apartment, the answer is yes and he mistakenly kinda stumbles upon the mom one night when he wakes up in the middle of the night for Snack and opts to pretend like its not happening. Unfortunately the thing she was trying 2 borrow (piece of crumb cake for Son Boy’s birthday) is the thing he wants 2 eat so he’s like “uh. ‘Scuse me, ma’am.” and he peels back the saran wrap on the other side of the plate, takes piece, nd then leaves some there for her

40-so now the woman is like ‘welp guess it time 2 Leave’

.1- she and husband Talk

.2-they decide it best 2 go

.3-theyre Packing

.4-lil bab Ellie confused

.5-hawk attacke

.6-cut to Ross

41- Ross also happens to work at a bar and he goes outside for a break

43- he finds smal child—smol smal—on the sidewalk and said child is missing an arm, nd has lost a lot of blood, so he’s uhhhhh Losing It highkey

43.5-parents r nowhere 2 b seen, but the hawk is nearby and circling. Ross gets an idea of what just happened

44- he up and leaves work, thankfully his apartment is above the shop so he jumps up the fire escape w the child and

45- he make tourniquet

46- he calls Mira nd asks her 2 come over to ASAP. he’s A Mess at this point

47- it is Very touch and go, kid needs blood, Mira is the only viable donor so she’s just gotta pray that the blood type is fine and won’t kill him

48- and then eventually they manage 2 stave infection thru antibiotics properly dosed to his size, Mira does Math and Prays basically

49- ‘bout a month in, kid wakes up

50- kid doesn’t rember much since he’s only 3

51- hes v scared of Ross at first but over time he gets used 2 the human

52- kid (elliot) starts 2 call Ross ‘dad’ after a while

53- Ross: *internal screaming but in a good way*

54- the end kinda for now

Part 2

A- New Borrowers In The Building

—three of em. paranoid dad, mom, nd daughter that’s Elliot’s age so he’s pumped

B- Elliot offers them a place 2 stay briefly

C- he knows by now bout like, how borrowers don’t typically interact w humans and Auntie Mira’s a bit of a weird case so he just doesn’t tell em bout his dad being the human

D- the kid finds out first nd doesn’t tell the parents, but they figure it out later kinda and think that it’s a ‘o god he’s being kept as a pet’ sitch so they’re >:| abt it

E- they move out and try to take Elliot w them (by force bcos they think he’s brainwashed) but he escapes and makes it to Ross, who’s like “uhhhhhh”

F- and the mom come out the hole near the counter n starts yelling at Ross, who is…kinda used to it since Mira brings in ppl who need help from time 2 time and they typically don’t react well when they’re lucid enough to understand what’s going on. He’s just not used to being questioned about his own kid

G- so they’re like “WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING WITH HIM”

H- and he’s like “r…raising him???”

I- and Ellie steps up and he’s like “this is my dad. I decided he was my dad when I was three. He’s being a good parent”

J- and Ross is like “yeah what he said. I’m a good parent.”

K- Ross is riding that high til the end of fucking time but like back to the story at hand

L- this is when the husband comes out nd is like “lissen. wifey. ily but that is a very big human and he hasn’t grabbed us yet so let’s count our blessings and gtfo”

M- but she’s like “uh no we stay until I’m sure Elliot is Safe and fucking Sound”

N- so they stay for dinner nd stick around a little longer.

O- Val (the kid) gets closer 2 Elliot and also Ross a bit

P- Mira shows once or twice, first time she shows up they’re like “oh god it’s the crazy doctor lady this all makes sense now” (bcos Mira does check up on as many borrower families as possible in her free time so word has got around by now Of her, and the number by which to contact her in case her services r needed)

Q- After a month or so, then they decide to leave bcos they’re like “look we get that ur son is ur son and he only has one arm and in our profession that is kind of a death sentence but we can’t have our kid getting used to dealing w humans who know about our existence” so they go and leave on a kind of sour note bcos Ellie can do anything he wants to do just as well as any other borrower Thank You Very Much and Ross is ready to fite anyone who thinks otherwise

R- Elliot starts trying 2 b more independent, basically from now on he’s like ‘I can do everything my Damn Self Thanks’

S- but uh he does it to a point where he’s going out of the way to endanger himself

T- so they get into a fite about it and ross Yells and Elliot is like ‘kthxbye’

U- and the boi just. Fuckin bolts. Runs Away. Ross is a Mess, he starts smoking again (he quit cold turkey the day he took Elliot in) to curb the depression, he’s jus. Not doin good, worried that his son is dead and the last time they talked it’d ended badly

V- FREEDOM!!!1! Except Ellie doesn’t kno how to take care of himself so it’s a rough month or so and then he runs into some other borrowers livin in their own town in the wild ig, chillin, being hella independent, and he’s like “uh yes ofc I will join u, I was w my dad for a while but.........” he neither confirms nor denies that his dad’s dead but everyone kinda just assumes.

Part 3

W-anyway a year goes by and then the borrower group gets hit hard w some kind of sickness ig. Elliot gets it too he’s basically incapacitated n drifting in and out of lucidity. So. They contact the weird crazy doctor lady who hangs around humans, a.k.a. Mira, and she’s like “oh. fuck. I know this kid.” bcos she does, u kno, and she jus treats em all for their ailment and shows them how to make antibiotic poultice thing in case smthn like it happens again. Mold. Penicillin is basically what it is

X-she and Elliot hav a Chat (Mira basically yells at him a lot) once he’s fixed up and he decides he’s gonna visit his dad but he makes it very clear that he is a Grown Up (he’s not, he’s literally sixteen), and he is living on his own now

Y- he agrees to stay for a week tho since he misses his home a lot tbh and Ross is just. Over the fucking moon to know he’s ALIVE, he’s not gonna fuck up their relationship by insisting that he stay. Or like, by keeping him ofc he would never

Z- unfortunately the borrower community put two and two together and figured out his dad’s human so they have his stuff packed up when he gets back w mira, who’s ready to go the fuck off on them

End 1:

-Ellie is living at Ross’s place atm and hopeful about the future basically. He eventually will go off on his own but he’ll keep in contact w his dad and stuff

Part C.5

55- few yrs later

56- elliot is Adult now he does adult borrower stuff

57- he moves out

58- finds nice borrower gf (her name’s Tess)

59- doesn’t tell her about his dad being human but talks about his dad a LOT

60- so when she asks to meet said father he’s just like “uh. Maybe we don’t do that actually”

61- and she’s like “y tho”

62- and he’s like “bcos”

63- anyway she decides to look into it cos she knows he goes to see his dad nd keep in touch but his dad is allegedly “a recluse who lives in the big scary human’s walls to avoid other ppl”

64- which is. Not true in the slightest tbqh he’s def not an introvert he’s just a workaholic and he Is the big scary human

65- anywho they run into Val and her wife and she’s like “how’s Ross been?” And Elliot is acting Very Suspish so she, being Smart, calls it immediately and is like “oh shit u haven’t told her yet have u”

66- Tess: “told me what”

67- Val: “El’s dad is a human, bro.”

68- Tess: “I’m sorry?”

69- this results in a Big Fight and they separate for like, a month. Elliot blames Val bcos he’s being irrational and doesn’t wanna admit to the fact that lying to his girlfriend for over a year was Real Bad Actually, but over time he’s like ‘yeah it’s my fault sry for snapping at u’ cos he works thru his emotions n stuff

70- Eventually gf comes back cos she’s like “ok so. I understand why you lied to me about your dad. It was a dick move but I do get it and I still care about you a lot. I would like. To meet him.”

80- this is a lie she does not want to meet him she is doing this bcos she does not want to lose Elliot and that outweighs the fear of his dad

81- so they go to meet him but she’s just kinda. Behind the wall at first like “that’s a crazy big human this is crazy ur crazy it’s time to gO”

82- Val is also there bcos she hasn’t seen Ross in a while

83- they eventually coax her out of hiding

84- and by that I mean Val picks her up and drags her out into the open by force bcos she basically freezes up the second she catches sight of Ross and Val’s like “u didn’t come all this way for nothing, bich”

85- they have a Painfully Awkward First Meeting, Tess is trying her best but oh god he’s just too fucking. Larg. Ellie ur dad too big

86- tbh tho the ice kinda breaks after Ellie and Ross get into a fight over smthn stupid (im thinking Elliot grumbles bout Ross’s hair being unruly and he’s worried that mira’s using it like a personal storage system again and Ross is like “I’ve been keeping better track of that actually” and then like a little line of paper clips and a few hand-bound notebooks tied together w some string fall out of his fucking mane and he’s like “I can explain”

87- “dad you can’t keep letting her use your hair like a fucking NEST”

88- Tess is laughing now cos god damn this was not what she was expecting

89- that’s it the end it ends w Tess laughing at them being idiots good times r had by all

Uhhhh that’s it so far. I have More but it’s kinda jumbled rn and I need to fit stuff in places. Anyway.

#was gonna make this into a comic lawl #if I like actually manage to get off my ass over the coming weeks I probably will be able to do that! but yeah #also this was once posted b4 and I deleted it but it’s back now say hellow #Library Fairy #oc: Mira #oc: Ross #oc: Elliot #oc: Tess #oc: Val #oc: Alexei #anyway yeah here it is behold #the uhhhhh most slice of life thing I have ever created

6 notes · View notes

cherry4reblog · 2 years

Text

Long BPD feelings/breakdown

Really trying to hold myself up since the new year and I’m just exhausted by it all. I’m so worn down. I haven’t really been using any social media and I’m not even crazy about posting here. Not many ppl really know this blog exists and it’s going to stay that way. I’ve fallen apart. Already. Again. Jokes on me right? It’s always me. I’m just always the one that has to take the fall bc who else will? It’s better that it’s me. I can’t get it all out of my head. I wish I could just get over it but it breaks my heart into a million pieces. I let myself care again. I let myself fall into that role again that I missed so much. I’m just forever doomed to not receive that fulfilment. I always know I’m not as good as everyone else. I’m not as good as Renee and everyone we’ve met thinks so. They’re so much easier to get along with. I only ever cause problems and get too upset. Why is that my use? Why is that all I’m good for to them? Do I not care enough? Do I care too much? I don’t know how to have friends. I don’t know how to be around others. I just make a fool of myself. I can’t keep trying like this I just want to give up. It feels so bleak in moments like this. I didn’t think I could let anyone new close to be again after what [G] did to me and I kept getting the feeling it was dejavu . It hurts to hear someone can’t stand to be around you anymore. It’ll hurt when inevitably let it happen again too. I always do. I always fall for it all over again. Because I just want friends. I just want people to talk to. I hate crying to myself all the time because I can’t get myself to open up unless I’m having a breakdown. Gods my breakdowns are so ugly I sound awful when I’m upset. There’s only been one time I haven’t regret crying on call and that was with … bc … made me feel like it wasn’t a nuisance. I feel like I should deserve better but it’s hard to hold that thought when so much around me is convincing me otherwise. I don’t want to feel so pathetic and miserable. I want to move on from it all. Learn from it. I just want to feel like I’m good enough for others because I try so hard to do right by them. I don’t want to feel so heartbroken all the time. I don’t want to cry so much. I’ve managed to do it every day so far this year and it just feels like a trend at this point. It really hurts. I feel like I have to hide myself. I don’t want to. I want to be close to people. I don’t know how. I never know how how. I’m always hurt no matter what I do. I just wish other people would just see me anywhere close to how I see/feel about them. I feel too intensely. It’s just the same feeling so intensely about …, except I don’t think … would do what others have done. I really hope … doesn’t gods I don’t know how much more heartbroken I can feel before I just can’t take it anymore. It’s been years of this. YEARS. Ever since [V] there’s been just a steady stream of these people coming into my life. And I let them all in. Why did I do that? I couldn’t have known though. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I wish I could trust so badly. I wish I could believe someone other than Renee would return how I feel about them. Gods… I can’t keep crying I think I need to just end the post. I wish I was stronger. People always call me strong but they never see how I fall apart. I can’t fall apart so easily when others are around. It’s not how I am. I try to. I just feel so guilty. I think it’s going to feel that way for a while again. I want to talk to someone about how I feel. So badly. But it never happens with me. I don’t know how. Idk anymore. I’ll probably play more power wash or watch something to try and push these thoughts out of my head. What else can I do.

#txt #bpd txt

2 notes · View notes

golbrocklovely · 3 years

Note

You're very stubborn too, i noticed. You have your opinions and no matter what people tell you they're not going to change your mind. Your replies often seem very dry and cut because you want to be nice but at the same time no matter what people say you see things the way you see things and will not be persuaded otherwise. You answer asks because you dont want a bunch of unanswered asks in your inbox but in reality you dont care about a lot of the stuff that gets sent in because you already have your mind set.

This is not an attack just an observation.

i mean... you're not wrong lol

i know i'm stubborn and i have my beliefs set on certain things and people. but i don't see that as a problem because i believe everyone can be stubborn about something.

we all have our set opinions about things. we all have "unpopular opinions" too.

for example, guacamole is gross. salsa is superior. you cannot tell me otherwise.

but to get back onto what you were saying...

i have my ask box open and on anon because i want ppl to come on here and vent their frustrations about whatever fanbase they are in. that's why i get asks about fanbases i've either never heard of or don't have opinions on.

i know what it's like to go against the grain when it comes to fandom opinions and thus feel like you can't say what you want to because you know you're gonna get hate. no one deserves that. even ppl who i fully disagree with that come on here and send in an ask, i'm never gonna be mean to them. i will be cut and dry, but i won't be rude.

that being said, there are certain situations that happen that i just, full-heartedly and transparently, don't have opinions on. it could be because i don't know the situation that well and are only going off of what the person sent in, or it could be that i don't know the influencer that well, and thus can't tell if this is a pattern to watch out for or just a one-off time they weren't at their best.

because that's how i feel for most influencers; not all, but most. we get a miniscule look into any influencers' lives on the semi-regular. there are gonna be times when they don't act at their best. there are gonna be times when they fuck up and do something wrong. does that give us the right to full on hate them now because of one fuck up? it depends on whether or not that fuck up was terrible and unforgivable, or just a random everyday-type of fuck up.

you wouldn't want ppl to hate you for one screw up, right?

let me use the example of tara and the previous asks i've been getting about what she did on jc's stream, since this has been the only time i've ever fully said 'i don't care about this situation'. now, i have a generally positive outlook towards tara. i like her content. i don't watch it that regularly to call myself a fan, but i do like it. i also like her relationship with jake, and i think overall i like her and her personality. that being said, from what i've been told about what she did on jc's stream, do i like what she did? no. cursing out his chat and maybe being overdramatic wasn't the best thing for her to do. if i was in her shoes, i wouldn't have played the game in the first place, but that doesn't matter. she knew what the game was and then didn't want to play it, but wanted the benefits. i get how that could upset someone.

do i now have a negative opinion about her because, to put it bluntly, she was a sore loser and stubborn? no. i still like her. what she did was forgivable. it's a one off time of her not being nice. i'm not gonna hate her now because of it. i also don't see these things as negative because i am these things as well lol

not to mention, i haven't even seen the stream. so yall could be full on lying to me (i don't think you are, but it's always a possibility). and because i know how good of a person she is, or at least i believe her to be, i'm not gonna change my opinion of her. if she acted like this all the time, then i would consider not being so positive towards her. but, that's not the case.

and also, because i'm not a huge fan of her, i don't care how she acted. i care that you guys are upset at what she did. i feel for you. that doesn't now mean i have to hate her. what she did didn't negatively effect me, and thus i don't have a full emotional opinion about it.

but if you do, you're allowed to feel that way. even if you didn't see the stream, don't know who she is, whatever the circumstance, you're allowed to be upset at her and now dislike her. i'm not saying you can't. i'm just saying because i don't care about the situation that much, i'm not gonna change my opinion about her.

i wanna make this clear that i don't really hate anyone that snc associates with, besides elton and brennen. those are the only two i dislike. but everyone else, i have positive feelings towards. that being said, i'm not a fan of them. i don't mean that negatively, i just mean i don't watch their content, don't follow, and don't really know anything about them. when you guys send in asks about these ppl that are negative/them doing something to upset you, i feel for you. i'm upset that you're upset. that's why i usually tell ppl that if an influencer is pissing you off at every turn, cut the tie. stop following them.

but unless the person did something morally corrupt or just super wrong imo, i'm not gonna hate them or change my feelings towards them.

have you ever looked at a gossip magazine cover and read the headlines and didn't have reaction towards any of them? that's how i feel for a lot of things influencers do.

if that makes me stubborn, so be it.

#ask #personal

6 notes · View notes

softesthobi · 3 years

Note

Honestly, the big problem with both PTD and Dynamite respectively is how we see absolutely no writing/producing credits from any of the members or BigHit's writers and producers, and these other Western producers/writers seem to THINK they're writing a song that feels Them and then it... really doesn't. While I don't agree with any excessive malice towards PTD specifically either (which I didn't see bc I was avoiding the discourse myself) I don't get why people are allergic to criticism of the song bc despite having BTS's faces on it, the song was barely even made by them to begin with?

Also it's success regardless of its quality is kind of inevitable with how ridiculously large this fandom is and how simultaneously big pockets of it keep pushing for the success of every new release, which seems to be typical in most fandoms at this point anyways which isn't my favourite thing but complaining about it gets me nowhere.

Last thing is that people saying this one song is bad isn't much of a big deal like... people keep saying "one song doesn't overwrite everything BTS have already put out" in its defence to people who are I guess putting their artistry in question, but this applies to when people don't like it as well; not liking one or two or three songs in their discography doesn't mean someone suddenly hates... all of it. Especially when this one song was barely written by them to begin with I'd find that MORE insulting.

I'm writing paragraphs here and this honestly shouldn't even have been a big deal to begin with but skfjdkhfkshfkdjf yeah

oh yeah that is probably part of the reason why the songs are not as good bc the people who write them think that this is what would fit bts. and yeah of course there's no use being overly negative, we can just voice our opinions and move on but the army is famous for not taking any criticism, whether it comes from outside or inside the fandom.

and i totally agree with you on the ppl pushing for success no matter what the song is like, streaming culture is one of the parts i dislike the most in music-related fanbases. i do note that the boys themselves seem very grateful to be on the top of the lists and i get that, i just wish they could get that recognition for the songs they worked on themselves and get to showcase their skills more. because if they succeed with a song like this their executives will want to make more of the similar success -> similar songs.

and yes bts have a huge discography and i don't think anyone genuinely loves all of the songs. it's not an issue to not like a song, it's normal sjkdjkfsdk

and yeah you're absolutely right this in itself isn't a big deal but!! what is a big deal at least to me is that if they continue this direction, i will lose a group that has been rly important to me in the past years. and yes i phrased it quite dramatically but what i mean is that i used to be excited every time they released new music bc i knew it was going to be good. and i think this is the case for a lot of ppl who haven't rly fancied the new direction and it's just a pity to lose something we love :/

#but anyway no need to be dramatic we can all find new interests #and i'm not ditching them but i can't rly say that i'd listen to these songs often either #asks #anon

6 notes · View notes

tellywoodtrash · 4 years

Text

immj 17.10.20 lb

ugh mummyyyyyyyyyyyyy. cannot stand this damn overacting, just stab yourself and chalti bano, c'mon.

good lord the early 2000s K-serial-esque reaction shots and whooshing sound effects, i cannot.

i am maata rani, smirking like DO IT BITCHHHHHHHH

GODDAMNIT VANSH.

some more overacting. also putting words in his mouth ki “tumne mujhe maaaf kyunnnn kar diya??”

lol sure, this is the face of someone who's forgiven ya.

yup he literally was like "save the drama, mama" and walked off.

“galat insaan se panga liya hai tumne, riddhima.” yehiiii toh hai riddhima's most fond hobby. casually taking panga with ppl who are waaaaaaaay out of her league.

could barely understand wtf he’s growling like an angry grizzly bear.

ofc wifey wants to do patni dharam of bandaging.

some unexpectedly deep statements about how she's only capable of hurting him, and he doesn't want bandages on his baahar ke zakhm. idk what the fuck right he has to be so uppity after breaking the bangle on her hand purposely.

idhar bhi some emotional blackmail about being his wife and it's her haq and farz and idk what else.

ugh she just said “maine tumhe dard diya hai vansh, par dard bhi toh apne hi dete haina?” WHICH IS SOMETHING I FUCKING HATE. STOP NORMALIZING THIS BS AND PROMOTING TOXICITY IN RELATIONSHIPS.

haq jataa jataa ke kaaboo mein kar liya.

fwding chachi's jewelry blah blah

iska chehra hamesha aisa kyun hai???? mummy ne sikhaaya nahi hai kya, ki mooh banaoge toh aise hi atak jayega.

some more saazish and scheming. just another routine day in the lives of these shady fucks.

i'm just whateverrrrrr about this scene coz hellooooooo, he hurt her hand too, and he has noooooooo issues with it.

but i can't help and lol at the way he's scowling like a child whose mom refused to get it some tooth-rotting sugar bomb at the supermarket.

throwing back that "apne" comment she made with a hard truth of his own: “apne apnon pe bharosa karte hain [...] do you trust me????? toh aaj tak apne aap ko yeh bharosa kyun nahi dilaa payi ki ragini ke baare mein maine tumse kuch nahi chupaaya hai? kyun dhoondti rehti ho usko idhar udhar?”

ok seriously, i am on neither of these dumbasses' sides. she is extraordinarily nosy and taang adaaofies in shit that's not her business, but my man, it's not like YOU'VE been an open book to her about yourself. why the fuck should she trust you??? based on what????? you've disclosed zero personal details about yourself willingly. like just the ragini thing itself; you’ve told her nothing about it, act incredibly cagey about it every time it’s brought up, and you want her to implicitly trust you that all is fine and dandy????? you think it’s fucking normal to have statues of random women who “betrayed” you in your attic????? aur toh aur, you want her to confide all her secrets in you, the man who put a gun to her fucking head on the wedding night??? and continues to intimidate her with death threats????? is that how you think trust is fostered?????? she doesn't trust you for THE SAME FUCKING REASON that you don't trust her. and that's coz you fuckers didn't even have one, decent chodo, not even one NORMAL conversation that two people should have before they marry. i haven't even watched the show beyond a week now, and i know that shit for a goddamn fact.

and you, missy. you need to stop being such a wishy washy dheent. decide once and for all which man you want, and stay tf on that side. i hate such thaali ki baingans.

oh yeah, itni akal hai tum mein ki she sent a parcel to sejal in mumbai and then she said she's in dubai, but you didn't realise the bs mummy fed you about that fucking painting???? honestly vansh, how does it even make sense, that riddhima was preventing her from disclosing a truth that would clear her own name??????

awwwwwwwwwwwwww yisssssssssss, baby sister, secret shaatir is here.

oh danggggggggg, she's the one who overheard riddhima last night. and she went straighttttttttt to vansh with it. i love itttttt. we loveeeeee a tight sibling pairrrrrrr.

lmao she's the one who spilt the beans about the painting as well. i fucking love it.

siya still trying to angle in some sympathy for bhaabi and bhai is like HMPH NO DON’T TAKE HER SIDE SHE IS A CHEATERCOCK

is he listening to himself??????? he wants to keep his own secrets but riddhima should disclose all of hers???? YEH KAUNSA LOGIC HAI BEY GOBAR GANESH????

siya thinking the same thing as me.

everytime vansh sits down on his haunches to talk to siya, my heart grows 6 sizes.

“nahi hai bharosa riddhima ko mujhpe.” says the forlorn SadBoiii, who married a girl just to find out who's she's working for as a spy.

siya like "meri hi budhdhi brasht ho gayi hai, jo mein inn bewakoofon ke chonchlon mein pad rahi hoon."

hallelujah, sis has finally decided to end all the dhokas. yeah, can't WAITTTTTTTTTT to see how that turns out. judging by past history and the general tone of this show, it should go super smooth and great!!!!!

dadi here with some cliche aansoon shraddha dialogues that are not at all helpful rn, but ok whatever.

blah blah be not only his sangini but also his rakshak. dudeee, goli khaaa chuki hai uske liye, isse zyaada kya raksha kare???!?!?!! matlab idk what kinda expectations ppl are keeping from bahus these days, fucking ridic.

this one also........ her mouth writing bharosa waala cheques that her perma-shakki brain can't cash.

maata rani suffers fools better than i do, and blessing the good dumb sis.

blah blah sajaaofy pooja ki aarthi ka thaal, do pooja, and everything will be changa. chalo, yeh bhi try kar lete hain. aapke adiyal pote ke dimaag ko thikaane lagaana bas bhagwan ke hi haath mein hai.

sejal callllllling. meaning KABIRRRRRRRR callingggg.

great, dadi being over-familiar and taking the phone to talk to sejal. ughhhhhhhhh.

grabbed the phone back in time. phew.

kabir feeling good enough to sip daaru from a nice delicate champagne flute, so can't say i feel too sorry for him rn.

but also my god, what in the random hell is the decor of his place? a wolf poster, the word GOLD, some ainvayi ka luxury type office chair. did he dumpster dive to collect this shit???

riddhima talking out of her ass and saying i won't help you anymore coz vansh isn't a criminal. sis, we’re all little bit of a criminal. you telling me he doesn’t have traffic tickets? doesn’t illegally stream shit online? doesn’t skip through reading the terms and conditions before clicking “i agree” on random websites, and then go on to completely ignore alllllllllllll the rules they stated about fair use???

kabir like OH WORD? YOU MUST HAVE PROOF OF HIS INNOCENCE THEN? which lmaoooooooooooo, that's not how the fucking law works, my good dude.

some more aadarshwaadi dialoguebaazi.

i am kabir. i am forever kabir. so done with this chick's unique blend of self-righteousness and idiocy and see-sawing ways.

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

15 notes · View notes

commanderlexaofthegrounders · 3 years

Note

And this year ftwd got kind of better, but I just watch the Alicia episode, and I will keep watching only the Alicia episodes (obviously not live) because good lord the other people cannot act except Colman, but now they separated them so I will have to watch Colman episodes too, maybe. Anyway Alycia this season 6 was just in 1 episode because they are doing an anthology tv show, every episode has it's own character, maybe 2 and that's it for most of the show unless they meet at the end, and it would even kinda work as a whole if all the characters were interesting on their own and were good actors too, but here nobody gives a shit about 90% of them, so why did they think it would work with this show is beyond me, people will watch only the episodes with their fav characater. And apparently Morgan tho is every episode like, fuck? They really are focusing on him and his story becoming the orizontal plot, stealing completely Alycia spot, well fuck you! it should have been Alicia storyline the main focus of the show, but noooo let's giving it to the man who came from another show, it's the worst thing about this show for me, completely side stepping her because what? She's too young to carry a show, she's a woman? What! Tell me!She's been carrying 2 shows on her shoulders for years without even starring on them, she can totally do it! Uugh, I want her to be out of that contract and sign a really good show that can improve and enhance her talent.

This is Fear no more, this is TWD Jr. They propped Boregan as the ultimate leader nobody asked for. S4 and S5 were such a bore-fest I gave up in 410. Just read some recaps and checked the gifsets of Alicia.

The problem now is that we have a S6 that is supposedly an anthology that focuses on TWD ppl. I never watched TWD and never will. I don’t give a flying fuck who is the new chick or Dwight or Boregan. They are expanding TWD on Fear with stories that were from the main show. They alienated viewers like me that started Fear because it was a different setting from the main show. I LOVED FEAR S1-S3 but not the current show w its current showrunners. Thanks Gimple.

How is it possible that the ppl that carried this show has been pushed aside? Alicia? Barely there. Strand? Slightly better but still is not about his journey. Luciana? We haven’t seen her at all. Daniel? Serving Boregan. All these characters are perfectly capable of dealing with the apocalypse. All of them showed us that they have what it takes to survive, yet here we are. Trapped with everyone serving Boregan’s development to lead us to the famous Rick movies.

I will watch Alicia’s clips and if she has an ep I will watch a stream. I’m done with Fear, even unfollowed them on SM. Always promoting the show with Alicia and Strand and saying how much of a leader she is and we get the same result back. NOTHING. She isn’t even there ffs. No wonder she had all the time in the world to be God Lexa. ADC needs to run as far away from that mess.

#ftwd #anon #ask me

11 notes · View notes

helly-watermelonsmellinfellon · 3 years

Text

Being able to make it so the Twins can’t use their power if you take Victor hostage the whole match, is a problem definitely. And some other things need to be worked out for the Killer, but I’m excited to face them when they officially get released.

IstG, the devs definitely have a ‘map of the day’ thing even if they deny it with their last breaths. Every single day I get one particular map 70% of the time.

Today was Mount Ormond ffs. I hate it. You can’t blend into anything on that map.

I’ve been equipping Flashlights out the ass. I had over 100 yellows on Claudette because I never used them, so I’ve just be practicing trying to get some Blinds on Killers. I’ve gotten better but I think the devs keep changing them with each update because by the time I get used to them, there’s an update and they feel different.

That issue with Meg, from my last DbD post, is still lingering.

Also, Nurses are completely invisible for me. I can’t even see their red stains.

Gotta love hackers. So many hackers.

The devs have to fix this weird thing where people get grabbed after clearing a vault despite the fact that they’ve cleared the entire vault. It has happened to me and ppl I’ve played with. I watched a Tapp get yanked despite his Lithe taking him far from the window he vaulted.

First match after 3 days with no internet: Good. Thank God.

This Huntress let me go when I was the last left alive, because I did the work. And I mean, I performed all Rescues. All 6 of them. Healed every person at least once. Did a whole Gen by myself(the only Gen that got done btw). Broke all the Totems(which was an Undying/Devour Hope combo so all were lit at some point). Managed to lose the Killer in every Chase she started with me. Never got Hit. Last dude dies and it’s just us. She was standing at the Hatch and nodding, so I gave her my Med-Kit before leaving. My teammates were all Red Ranks and the Huntress was not.

Today was all Coal Tower. Not that bad of a map so I didn’t mind all that much. It’s the days where it’s just corn maps that really get me. I am colorblind and no matter if I’m Killer or Survivors, the corn blends into a single color for me, which eclipses every other color because there’s so much of it, and it’s hard to make out even the shape of corn stalks. Having that one add-on on Doctor where they get a red stain when in a Chase is the only way I can handle corn maps. Bright, glowing red among the burnt yellow is a beacon.

I loaded into a lobby with all Feng Mins. I was Fluorescent Feng Min myself and wasn’t changing any time soon. I think the other 3 were swf because their builds were all exactly the same. They had Dead Hard/Saboteur/Botany Knowledge/Breakdown with pimped out Med-Kits. Well, I found a Purple Flashlight and proceeded to be an ass to the Killer with it, leading her on, Blinding her, slamming pallets on her, not taking her hatchets seriously and barely moving out of the way. Like, I finished the last Gen in her face, rotating around the Gen while she missed throws from across the map! She just stopped trying.

Played my first Killer match in a week. Spirit. 3K. Was long and hard won, but worth it. They were swf and the dude who Escaped sent me a GG and also told me my play style for Spirit is ‘weird but works somehow’ and said they had a hard time communicating cuz I would randomly stand still and then surprise them. I don’t phase in Chase cuz I haven’t worked it out well yet. I phase to patrol large distances quickly which is why speed add-ons are the most important to me.

I don’t like playing as Hag. She’s so fucking short and it kills me! I have so many 4th Anniversary Cakes on her, but I just don’t like playing her. Though the body blockers at pallets and windows are funny.

Did a Trapper match where I surrounded the Hatch with all the traps. I even let the person go because they got through the first line of defense before I could reach them. The Hatch was against the shack wall so with only three sides you could enter from, I used 2 traps for each side! If they want to Escape, they must work for it, and those add-ons were meant to slow trap disarming a shit ton.

Did some Default Meg games. People leaving the lobby when a Default character loads in is the fucking best! XD And when the same person who just left, reappears, it’s even better!

I’m trying to do this Challenge where I hit two ppl with Hillbilly’s chainsaw within 30 seconds of each other, but it’s so hard! It is so damn hard! I barely managed the one where I have to down someone 4 times in one match! That David lead me so fucking hard but I needed to chainsaw him before the last Gen finished otherwise I’d have to try the challenge again and I really didn’t want to!

Got Hawkins with Hillbilly again. Didn’t used the chainsaw except to break pallets and still got a 2K.

Repeated something I tried on Trapper once, and got the some map too! Basically, add-on’s for more traps. Then find my Ruin Totem and just use all traps on the map to surround it. It was dead center, all glowing and shit in the dark of the swamp. The grass and mud successfully hid the traps all over that small area, save for the one directly blocking immediate access, which was obvious. So Survivors would just run into the grass and get caught. Like, they finally learned when 2 were dead to just leave Ruin alone after that, but it was funny! I managed a 3K. ^-^

I, Rank 4, got a match where every other Survivor was Rank 17-20. And the Killer was Rank 1. And they were just dropping like flies, and I had to save everyone because they were all hiding and self-caring(badly)/dying/hooked! Got Iridescent Emblem for Benevolence but got no other points save for dying as the Obsession. I’m annoyed. First truly horrible instance of matchmaking in a while.

youtube

^I got the Hatch after the recording stopped. I circled the map back to where she’d gotten Hooked and watched as he teleported from the shack to the Hatch(on the other side of the map) to hit me just as I was going in. Got to keep that Key too.

The first person DC’d when he teleported across the map and grabbed them while we were doing a Gen. We could see him at the lodge just fine from all the way in the corner, and then suddenly he was behind her and pulling her off. It was a wide, open space. There was no way even with Perks, he would have been able to sneak up on us. We could see him coming from any direction.

That Feng Min and I watched him remain unmoving, from behind those trees, before she ran off to try and do a Gen. And that’s when I started recording because I had a feeling something was shifty.

He was a streamer and when I checked his stream, he was whining about how I shouldn’t have been able to Escape.

I reported him.

#dbd #dead by daylight

7 notes · View notes

f1shtears · 4 years

Text

sighs i rly wanted to get up actual full-bodied requests in the tag but @ this pt i don’t think that kind of thing is going to happen before opening tmrw (this post itself might even be too late) basically this is a v quick v badly described run down of all the request-esque things i’m looking for for certain characters 👀👀👀

blaise hwang (23 yrs old, lee taeyong) - a messy ass streamer house (they all live under the same roof in seattle, having their own rooms to stream from) probably do a lot of group streams, a lot of collabs, dumbass prank videos filmed exclusively for their group youtube channel (i dnt have a team name yet kill me) following every single trend & posting their own versions of them, posting memes in their group chats, etc. but i was thinking they could potentially be a lgbtq+ stream team on twitch ? (they all dnt have to belong to twitch & twitch exclusively btw - some could be youtubers, some could be tiktok, some could belong to multiple platforms - as long as they have some form of social media presence they could fit in this) n by messy i want past relationships, future flings, this person slept w/this person but then this person the next day, just !!! messy (i’m bad @ explaining i’m so sry)

unnamed kim hyojong (i’m working on it i swear) (25-30 yrs old) - an ex/baby momma/future poly female basically needing the mother of hyojong’s daughter/son (haven’t decided which yet) there are some TRIGGER WARNINGS for this req (drug use/abuse/addiction mainly - as hyojong is a recovering addict) rn baby momma (wat i’ll call her for now) is dating someone new (anywhere from a yr or less) who’s rly good to her (not to say hyojong was horrible but obviously when he wasn’t sober he wasn’t him), who’s good for their kid/good w/them, but hyojong has been going on 1 or 2 yrs clean now (the longest he’s ever been clean) & mb things are reminding them of how things used to be between them (when he wasn’t as addicted as he ended up being - tbh u can have her have been using too or not, that’s completely up to u, but mb he did push or pressure her into trying some things w/him while he was high & she did them bc she was that stupid in love, didn’t think much of w/e drug it was) anyway, obviously feelings redevelop but she also still has feelings for her current partner & this is where we’re going to work things into a poly w/jace’s jung wooseok (currently unnamed) obviously some things we can all work out together but some fc ideas are: kim hyuna, lee siyeon, hirai momo, minatozaki sana, open to other suggestions/western fc suggestions too (if none of these r ur fancy) the only other thing solid abt her is that she should be close in age to hyojong (anywhere from 25-30)

rehab group ? don’t rly have much in mind for this yet bc it’s literally sth i just thought of for him but just a big mess of ppl regularly going to a support group for recovering addicts (of drugs and/or alcohol) if anyone has any additional interesting ideas for sth like this def drop me a discord or tumblr dm/ask - obviously some can be recovering as long as hyojong (1-2yrs) but maybe some are ppl who are a week clean, come in & talk abt how they relapsed & did such & such drug again, rinse & repeat ? ppl who aren’t sober rn but still come for the support, those of them that are sponsors, etc. just a big mess of people needing the help & support & hopefully finding it in each other - mb a bit of a makeshift family for one another 🥺

unnamed hwang hyunjin (again, i’m working on it cries) (19 or 20 yrs old) - adopted family v loosely based on netflix’s umbrella academy this one is harder to explain in a quick para but... essentially a rich couple adopting different ethnicity babies/children (would be adopted young) from around the world (a way to include diversity in the family so pls try not to double up on an ethnicity if possible [just bc i’m playing an asian ethnicity doesn’t mean other asian ethnicities can’t be included as well tho]) n while these children don’t have super powers (obviously) most of them r gifted (weren’t born that way but were given the opportunities [& pressures that come w/those] growing up) for ex: hyunjin is going to be an olympic lvl figure skater BUT i am looking for this family to have a klaus-esque character too (aka a total fuck-up - or so most their family thinks) someone who doesn’t try (mb they did @ 1 pt/showed they could do it if they tried but...) also thought abt the possibility of including the ‘ben’ TRIGGER WARNING suicide and/or suicide attempt - mb all the pressure rly got to 1 of the kids to the pt of them either committing suicide successfully, or if someone is interested in playing them, having attempted suicide (i know it’s not rly said wat’s happened to ben in the show but i saw a fan theory for this @ 1 pt)

this family will either have 5 or 6 (if someone wants to make the ‘ben’) remaining spots (not including my character) pls keep in mind none of the other characters (besides the klaus/ben) have to resemble any characters from the show @ all (& the klaus/ben are able to be played differently from how they r in the show - u can completely take the char & do it up however ud like to, as long as the concept is similar) but if u want to resemble them slightly off a character feel free to, this req is rly just v loosely based on the family aspect of the show/them being ‘gifted’ - age range can be anywhere from 18-early 30s (give or take)

drop me an add on discord sigh™duck#1141 or send me a dm/ask here on tumblr if ur interested in any of these requests !!! probably won’t have official site requests up for most of these for a little while

#sweeterplacerp #drug addiction tw #suicide tw #i tried to warn before these tws showed up but pls lmk if i should edit anything #or if i missed anything else i should tag

17 notes · View notes

hayesit · 4 years

Text

matt’s 2019 year in review

here it is! and it’s late because i had other/better things to do (and procrastinating), was recovering from hangovers (also procrastinating), and recovering from being sick (procrastinating).

i’ve been doing these year in review posts since 2016, so here is my fourth installment. every year i look back through my google calendar, my camera roll, and my bullet journal as a gratitude exercise and to chart my own development as an adult.

here is my spotify wrapped 2019!

the beginning of this year was off to a good start: i met two friends that i know through the internet! i met my friend riley when she visited boston (i met her through a mutual friend and through overwatch league twitter) and my friend jimmy that i’ve known for…. 6 or 7 years (?!) through tumblr and designed the logo for me and alex’s late podcast, hardly tea, may she rest in peace.

i moved dorm rooms in between the fall and spring semester, and once again i was not happy with where i lived. i lived with 4 rando’s that i was placed with and the 5 of us barely even talked with each other. my direct roommate i saw for only two weeks, and for the nights he slept over in the bed (that he was paying room and board for) and had the worst snoring humanly possible that not even earplugs could kill (video below). i hardly slept while he was there and roamed the halls of riverview suites like a ghost due to the anxiety i felt about my lack of sleep (we love a vicious circle)! he disappeared after those two weeks without notice and i lived in fear of him returning for the rest of the semester (which he didn’t), but returned to my normal sleep schedule.

youtube

that semester was my first semester of full-time grad school. i got a poor grade on an assignment that had a note from the professor that said she knew i could do better and it hit me how much different grad school is from undergrad and how much more effort and dedication it requires. after crying in my professor’s office, my work ethic has improved since then, but it’s not anywhere near where i’d like it to be (more on that later).

now to more positive things for the spring semester: i met some friends that semester both ~on and offline~ that made the semester far more bearable AND i did however truly pop off in every last one of my powerpoint presentations for class. i looooove making powerpoints and just fuckin telling jokes about my research topic and have ppl tell me that they are looking forward to my presentation & that i should teach college classes :)!

me and 4 friends had a social group in which we’d drink and play board games and forget about the board game and drunkenly talk shit called cabam after all our first initials! i always looked forward to that and dug the group chemistry a lot.

during this semester i grew a “ beard “, otherwise known as i chose not to shave just to “ see what would happen “ (praythatitfilledin). sorry about that!

the overwatch league was something that i had to look forward to watch every week and i had my experience enhanced through sideshow and avast’s unofficial companion streams, which guaranteed lots of laughs. i have bought tickets to two boston home games in 2020 which i am very excited about! analysts have predicted boston to be in 20th place this year (there are 20 teams) but i’m still excited for the 2020 season anyway!!

i can’t have a year-in-review of 2019 without mentioning game of thrones. due to the show’s final season being undeniably weak, i enjoyed the camaraderie with the other people that watched thrones during those six weeks. i haven’t thought about the show or its universe for quite a while, unfortunately. i truly was quite into the world of westeros, but the weakness of the end of the story cheapened the journey of each of the characters, in a way. such a shame.

while i got my diploma in december 2018, i walked across the stage of umass lowell’s tsongas arena with my bachelor of arts in psychology (and minor in theatre arts). it wasn’t as emotional or triumphant of an experience and just felt weird, considering i had already gotten my diploma and was going to remain in the clutches of rowdy the riverhawk as i am staying for my masters degree in applied behavior analysis/autism studies. i brought a ceramic monkey to graduation. it didn’t have any symbolism, but i just wanted to see if they’d stop me (which they didn’t)

this summer was better than most summers of mine go, i hung out with alex nearly every weekend, got my very first iphone, and got a data plan. the combination of these three things got me back into playing pokemon go, an unexpectedly fun pastime! went on lots of walks!

my favorite day of summer was going to a lake with alex and our friend gianna, who i grew closer to after meeting her during macbeth last year. fond 2019 memories with gianna include: doing simulation patients with her, watching movies with her and alex, and the halloween party. what a great gd person and a great gd friend! big fan and eternally rooting for her.

fire emblem: three houses came out on the switch in august and is, without a doubt, my game of the year. there’s truly so much to love about the game: the world, the characters, new changes made to the series, things that were gone but returned, interesting micromanaging, and best of all, how huge my brain feels when playing it.

i got a 6-week summer job as a paraprofessional at an extended-school-year program for children with developmental disabilities at a preschool in haverhill which taught me a lot of lessons, such as: i hate cleaning shit off of children.

then i had feelings that didn’t make much sense for about a month! whoops!

my full-time job i currently have is working at my old high school as a behavior specialist. i provide consultation and work on programs to lead to more appropriate behavior in students, primarily ones with developmental disabilities. so far it’s been fairly rewarding, some days are more challenging than others, some days are a lot of sitting in meetings, and some days are a lot of running around. some days there is not much to do at all, which has its obvious upsides and downsides. working at the high school isn’t something that i want to do forever, but it’s a good place to start with. i’m definitely learning a lot and there are a lot of benefits to working here. sometimes i can work on my grad school work (which is all online until the 2020 summer semester) which is definitely huge. and my commute is either a 15 minute walk or 3 minutes if my mom drives me!

a ~complex~ thing about working in my hometown is that it makes the most financial sense to live at home because it’s so close to work. this is my first time living at home full-time since high school and i’m not enjoying that part too much. most weekends i visit alex in lowell, but being stuck at home with no car (going to retake the license test in the spring when the ice melts!) and having to go to bed so early definitely hurts. sure, i have what is likely the lowest amount of expenses i’ll ever have in my life (no car-related payments, no rent, no groceries), but i feel landlocked. i feel like a teenager with minimal freedom, which is in part because my mom doesn’t quite understand yet that i’m a 22 year-old that should have a lot more freedom than i do now. the most i really do on weekdays after work gets out (2:30p) is go to savers with my mom if it’s tuesday (senior citizen day), maybe go for a walk if it’s nice out (which for most of the school year, it isn’t), or be on the computer watching bon appetit videos and playing overwatch, fire emblem, or pokemon, eat a bland dinner at 6, go to bed at around 9:30. sad! truly not a situation that i want to be trapped in that much that much longer!

i think the best and most important part of this year was becoming closer with alex. as i mentioned before, we see each other most weekends, to our great benefit. our living situations have flip-flopped, with me living at home and alex living in an apartment near campus, which in both similar and different ways have taken their respective tolls on us. having each other while going through changes and stagnations in our lives has been immeasurably important. thank you alex for providing a place to be myself other than my own head. thank you for being my best friend.

now i come to the thing that i’m most excited about for 2020. not 2 suck my own horn but i have cobbled together a fuckin dream team of five friends (me, alex, chris, kelly, and molly). the two times we have all gotten together it has been so satisfying in such a wonderful and otherworldly way that i am filled to the brim of happiness being around them. the craziest thing is that i met chris and kelly through twitter! TWITTER. and they’re real-ass people and my real-ass friends! i haven’t been so pleased with something in my life like this for so long and it feels so good to have adult friends that i have chosen rather than friends by circumstance. it’s truly a crime that we can’t see each other more often, but we already have a day picked out for the next time we all do something together. feeling emotional writing this paragraph bc i love me gd friends so much!

there is a lot of uncertainty about this new year for me. i sure as fuck don’t want to live at home more than i have to but don’t know where to go, my practicum class starts for me this summer which means i’ll most likely have to change jobs (fine by me, but will be exhausting), i recently began my search for therapists and hope to find one soon to help me ~unpack things~, my thesis begins in the fall semester and i don’t know what to do for it, and i’m not 100% dead-set on working in special education. it’s been hard transitioning from living on campus and going to school full-time to the life i have now.

#year in review #personal

7 notes · View notes