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#but either way you guys treat it as if it's not clearly what we're meant to think
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why do you guys talk about tea theory as if it isn't... the clearly intended way for us to interpret the teas
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lazinesswrites · 1 year
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I should've been working on my thesis today, but instead I've been thinking about clones. I did also work on my thesis just not as much as I probably should have.
I finally reached the part of Clone Wars where the Bad Batch are introduced and watched it twice and I have some Thoughts. Since you all seemed to like my May 4th post (seriously, it's still getting new notes every day, what's with that? - not a complaint) I figured I'd share.
I will warn you right now: It may become clear in this post that I'm studying Communication, and also that I find Words and How People Use Them really interesting.
So. Okay. We all like Cody, right? He's a good guy. He spends a lot of time with Kenobi, and also Skywalker, so some snark is to be expected, but over all he seems like a nice guy (not to be mistaken for a Nice Guy TM, which is something completely different and not actually very nice at all). It's also made clear that he's worked with the Batch several times before, and that the Batch all seem to like him well enough, for a reg, anyway.
Cody introduces the Batch to Rex as "defective clones, with... desirable mutations". Defective. From a guy who seems to at least respect them, and have earned their respect in turn.
It makes me wonder... How often have the Batch heard that word? How many times have they been called something even worse? Sure, they weren't around to overhear it this time, but that doesn't mean aren't sometimes, or that other people won't say it to their faces.
And what almost makes it worse is, I don't think Cody meant anything bad by it. It wasn't an insult, just a word, a fact - a way to describe them that Rex would understand. An Rex probably doesn't see it as an insult to them either; a cause for concern, maybe, but not too bad, because Cody clearly trusts them to get this job done. And Rex seems to respect 99, too; another 'defective' clone (see his comment about naming them Cloneforce 99 'a nice touch') (idr if Cody is ever seen interacting with 99 or talking about him or giving away an opinion one way or another, but probably he liked 99 just fine too).
What I'm getting at is... Just because Cody and Rex don't use 'defective' as an insult, that doesn't change the fact that it is a negatively charged word, especially when directed at clones, who are people, but often treated more like droids; where defect means damaged, means not worth it, means decommissioned, means dead, in one way or another. And the fact that the word is so commonplace that good guys like Rex and Cody use it so flippantly... That must be really fucking hard, to live with that moniker hanging over your heads all the time, no matter how good you are at what you do (A 100% success rate doesn't happen accidentally - that's what happens when you can't afford to be anything less than perfect). No wonder they try to turn it around; wear it like armor: Yeah, we're a "bad batch" but we're still here.
Honestly, "regs" seems kind in comparison.
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popculturebuffet · 22 days
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Seeing your posts on how you've despised the way season 6 handled the Mordecai/CJ/Margaret love triangle, did you read about writer Matt Price's posts on a Reddit AMA regarding why Mordecai didn't end up with Margaret or CJ in the end?
He said "We felt like the Margaret/CJ story was complete, and they were both on their own path already. We also felt like Mordecai had moved on in his life. He finally left the park to pursue art, and we thought it'd be cool if he met someone while doing that. But we love Margaret and C.J., and we're sure that they're happy without Mordecai! He was too wishy-washy with them!!"
To make things worse, Matt said that Rigby's Graduation Day Special planned to have CJ react to the Park crew going to outer space with an annoyed look implying ""Whatever, I'm glad that guy is in space."" Really feels he was trying to push the "CJ hates Mordecai and Margaret after their breakup" thing way too hard (glad it didn't make it to the final cut).
He also said that CJ apparently cut off all contact with Mordecai, Margaret, Rigby, and Eileen, which is a contrast to him confirming Margaret still keeps in touch with and remains friends with Mordecai, Rigby, and Eileen. Would you say this is kinda sad knowing CJ never got to even reconcile with Mordecai as friends like Margaret did in season 7? Plus making Eileen's sadness on not being able to hang out with both CJ and Margaret in I See Turtles even sadder with the implications of CJ cutting off contact with her in the end (likely just because she associates with Margaret) too.
Nope. I don't really keep up with regular show news. I still like the show and I loved close enough (RIP), but I just don't. But since CJ is near and dear to my heart as a character this does intrest me so let's get into it.
On not having Mordecai get with either of them: It was the right call. I didn't really mind when I saw the finale and time, maturity and what have you have only made me like the decision more. Part of it is where the series was at: The "Mordecai nukes his happy relationship arc" was a mess i've still only barely watched and plan to cover someday, but so far haven't gotten to. It was easily the worst thing the show's done and made me stop watching it for a season.
It was absolutely the right call to instead have him conciously take a break from dating, work on himself. He didn't do much of that before they got shot up into space, but it was a good effort. He burned that bridge with CJ the second he kissed Margret and them getting back together was a huge mistake: Mordecai never really found the right way to apologize and CJ clearly never got over the betrayal or her paranoia he'd do it again. Instead having the major arcs be "setup for next season" and "Rigby tries to better himself by going back to school' were a better choice, as was just.. putting the final season in space.
With those arcs it also meant there really wasn't room to speedrun a new relationship fans woudln't want. It makes more sense that after finally deciding to focus on his art, he grew up, had some time to mature and THEN met the love of his life. Margret had moved on with her life, Mordecai moved on with his. I do think the show fucked up with the love triangle, but this is the only move they could really make and I support that. It may blow a little Mordecai and Margret seemingly ends with a whimper.. but it's what the show and the character sneeded. Sometimes... life and cartoon shows dont' work out. People drift apart.
On the deleted scene: Seconded bud. Seconded. I do think the show REALLY fucked up with how it treated CJ during season 6, and really underestimated how attached fans had gotten.. which itself is baffling. She was part of the main cast. She took Margret's spot. She was in a decent chunk of episodes. Fans liked her and took her side in the breakup, and while she was super paranoid with mordecai, it's really hard not to blame her. Less easy to forgive the attempted murder but what can you do. So having her just go "Whatever I dont' care" feels wrong. Her not carring MOrdecai got shot up into space? In character, she dosen't have to care about her ex anymore. he fucked the relationship up beyond any hope and she made a mistake taking him back as she clearly coudln't forgive him. But her not having the slightest horror at Rigby or Eileen getting shot up , her friend and her best friend, feels so wrong it hurts. Eileen was the only thing that got her to actually be around margret and not fly into a jealous rage. What the fuck.
On the cut off thing: that just feels sad.. but i've come to accept it more. I DO think her cutting off Eileen is dickish and like to think she at least parted as amicably as she could.. but I also get it. Eileen is with Rigby, marries rigby, has his kids. The two are in a fantastic supportive relationship that shows how far he's come as a person and how far out of her shell she's come. It's adorable.. but it also means being around Eileen runs the risk of seeing Mordecai. Being Eileens friend means a pretty solid chance of running into her ex any time Eileen has a party, at the wedding, at the birth of her kids etc.
Being petty about Eileen being friends with Margret is one thing. margret fucked up.. but geninely tried to back off after making a heat of a moment mistake she clearly regretted deeply, and only told the boyfriend lie to save herself from a helicopter crash, an entirely fair reaction. Being shoved on a double date with her ex and his justifably jealous girlfriend who not so justifably tried to unalive her was not her idea. The two could manuver around each other, maybe awkwardly say high, I See Turtles proved they could at least be civil for Eileens sake.
But seeing her ex every time her best friend had a huge life event... that's a lot to ask. Eileen would be heartbroken.. but would understand why CJ had to break off their friendship and while I See Turtles was a good ep.. it WAS a lot to ask CJ to be around Margret right after what happened. Personally even if it's not how the creators see it I see the two reconnecting with time. CJ's moved on with her life, maybe gone pro with dodgeball, Eileen's a professor with a loving stay at home husband.. thier in a place they can be friends again and CJ, while not necesarily ever forgiving mordecai, can stand being around him. I could see her holding that grudge for a while, understandably so and people CAN hold onto grudges forever if they want.. but it just dosen't fit here. CJ grew up, and while she dosen't really keep in touch with her ex.. I like to think she got her friend back. Maybe her and Margret even become friends
Hell honestly I just had the idea margret and CJ eventually hook up: Margret genuinely apologizes for everything, CJ does the thing, one thing leads to another. I mean they do kinda fit: CJ's mordecai with his shit together, Margret is kind and empathetic, and I did really like it the last time an asshole's exes had better chemistry with each other instead of him.
SO TLDR: there honestly isn't anything that obnoxious in this. I don't like the idea of CJ cutting eileen off.. but most of it fits and the one part that didn't was cut out as they realized it didn't. For how badly the crew fucked up that love triangle.. they recovered fine.
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mondaychildsworld · 9 months
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I know the end
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Previous chapter / Next chapter
Part Six / ?
Rating: E
Word Count: 4.3k
Chapter summary: As you're captured, locked up and get severely hurt, Joel and Ellie is closing in on your tracks. There's thin line between life and death, but somehow the unimaginable happens and you can soon put this behind you. (happy end I promise)
Warnings: This is my worst chapter I've written. So if you don't vibe with any kind of violence, torture, blood and being treated very badly this is you que to skip this chapter. TW: violence, threats, getting burnt, blood, slight insinuation of SA (we're good tho), just straight up torture.
A/N: I'M SO SORRY for this chapter. I feel HORRIBLE for putting my character through this much pain. But she will be ok. It will be ok in the end. I would never end this story on a bad note. But this world is not a nice place to live in either, so it would be hard to write a dystopian story with just fluff and happiness because that's not realistic. But I promiiiiiise you some feelings and smut in the next one very soon to make it up to you. Like... in a couple of days 🤭
And here’s my tiny taglist: @boofy1998 @orcasoul
December 5th, 2023
It’s cold. And hard. Your fingertips trace the surface you’re laying on before you open your eyes. When there’s a big snort in the distance. The sound is not human. You open your eyes in panic. The first thing you see is the ceiling. You quickly sit up and look around. You’re in a stable. 
You stand and peek through the bars surrounding the top part of the stall. Opposite of you are kind eyes and the soft nose of a horse. You relax. 
“Hi there buddy.” you say and you try to open the stall door. Locked. “We’re both locked up in here I guess?”
The horse keeps staring at you, their new neighbor. On the door to his stall is a nameplate, someone had carved “Tucker” in the wood. After greeting your companion and having a look around your stall you try to kick the door open, to see if you can break the lock. 
You sigh when the lock doesn’t give up and start circling around the small room. You got captured, hit in the head and locked up. Great. Now you need to figure out how to get the hell out of here. 
The horse suddenly gives off a fussy neigh. He draws his ears back at the exact moment a door down the hallway bursts open. You curl up in the corner of the stall and hope that they’re not here for you. You hear footsteps approaching and stop right outside your stall.
“Well, well, well…” you hear the man’s voice say. “Look who’s awake.”
You hear a laugh. There must be two men. You nervously glance up and see two faces outside of the metallic bars. You recognize them from before.
“I told you I didn’t want to disturb you” you try, but you can see on their faces that they won’t accept your weak attempts of talking your way out of this. 
“I didn’t want to disturb you” the guy to the left, the one with a dark blue beanie mimics you. He clearly wants to make fun of you and the other one laughs. 
“Tell us why the fuck you’re out here sneaking up on us and where your group of people are.”
“I’m alone, I don’t have anyone.” you try. It is true. You were alone. But it still feels like you’re lying. 
“Yeah, no one’s gonna believe that.” the one to the right tells you. He was the one to slam the butt of the rifle in your head. He’s blonde and has a long beard. “You better give us better answers or you’ll soon regret not cooperating with us.”
“I’m telling you the truth, I got here alone.”
“Bullshit.”
“A pretty girl like you wouldn’t make it out there all by yourself.”
You frown and feel nauseous at the fact that he called you that, it certainly was not meant as a compliment.
“Alright, I’m gonna tell you…” you start, and you do gain their attention because they’re suddenly listening carefully to what you have to say. “To… go fuck yourselves.”
Their hopeful expression falters. The guy with the beanie kicks the wooden door of the stall. You’re kind of happy that you got them like that, but you’re scared at the same time. You try your best not to show it.
“If you wanna play with us, pretty girl, let’s play.” the bearded man says and they leave the stable. 
You still hear them talking outside for a while. There’s a crackling noise, footsteps, and a clunking noise of metal. You hug your legs even tighter to your chest. You can’t help but shake, from the cold or from fear, you can’t tell. 
When you hear the men walking down the hallway of the stable again it’s like you can sense that something's wrong. It’s something in the breeze of winter air flowing inside of the building, like it’s trying to warn you. A chill goes down your spine. 
There’s more men this time. The one from before, the guy with the blue beanie unlocks your stall and walks inside. He’s closely followed by two other men you don’t immediately recognise. They roughly tug you away from your safe corner and pin you to the ground. 
You try to fight yourself free but they’re three, and strong. Way stronger than you. 
“Pretty girl, are you cold?” the guy with the blonde beard appears by the stall door. 
“Fuck you!” you yell at him and squirm. You caught yourself thinking if this is what you think is about to happen you’d rather be dead but when you see the item in your hand, and you’re filled with an even bigger fear. 
When he takes a step into the stall you see the glowing iron in his hand. It’s an old forging tool, all bent and broken, but glowing hot. 
“You have a choice, tell me the truth about why you were sneaking around our farm or… you’ll get a little bit hot.” he smirks down at you. 
“I was j-just passing b-by.” you cry out. “I was just l-looking for a hiding s-spot for the night.” 
You’re hyperventilating by now. The tears are streaming down your face. 
“Hiding from what, sweet thing?” he asks again. 
You don’t know what to answer. You didn’t hide from anything specific. Maybe Joel and Ellie, maybe from raiders and infected, but maybe just as much from yourself. From whatever future you had. By the looks of it now, that future seemed incredibly short. 
“N-nothing.” you sob. 
”Not the right answer!” he yells at you and nods towards one of his men. He reached over you and tore your shirt open. The buttons rip off and you hear them fall to the ground.
“Let’s see how pretty you are after this” the blonde man says and leans down towards you, with the glowing iron in hand. 
You squeeze your eyes shut and brace yourself for what is about to come.
Afterwards, they had left you all alone on the ground with burn marks covering your upper body. You were still in shock. You did your best not to look, but cried while you tried to button up your shirt again. It was ruined. You were ruined. It was all about survival now. 
As soon as you gained some sort of normal awareness back you started planning your escape. By sunrise you were ready. You were hurting too much to sleep anyway.
There was a small window at the top of the wall, close to the ceiling. The metallic bars were too high to climb and squeeze over, but you could maybe fit through the window.
Your problem was to get yourself up there. But you had time to think and look around. There was a bridle on a hook on the door to the horse’s stall, and a broom standing close to yours. If you could reach the broom, you might be able to reach the bridle, throw it up to the old handle on the window, drag yourself up and push the window out. After that you’d get back inside, take Tucker and leave on horseback. 
You set your plan to work and you were determined to get out of this hell hole. The pain was almost unbearable, as you had to put your arm between the bars, shove yourself closer and lean all your weight onto your upper body to reach the broom. 
You gasped loudly as your fingers brushed the broomstick. The movement hurt too much. You had to pause and recollect yourself a couple of times before you successfully reached the broom.
“Yes!” you mumbled to yourself. 
A couple of minutes of trying to wind down and you were ready. You stuck the broom out from your stall, holding the brush part. Tucker jerked back when you reached the broom towards his stall. He nervously stamped around and let out a dull neigh. 
“Sssh sweet boy.” you hushed the horse. “Don’t you worry Tucker, I’m getting you out of here.”
You catched the bridle with the broomstick and sighed in relief. Tucker neighed once more, louder this time. You flinched and hushed him again. You don’t want to get caught, so you’d need to hurry. 
You threw the bridle up high towards the knob at the window frame. You had to throw it a few times before it stuck. 
You took the brindle and put your foot inside of the loop. After a deep breath you braced yourself and pushed yourself up. There was a shooting pain in your whole body from the strain of the movement. 
Just as you pushed the window open Tucker neighed once more and reared. 
“No, no, no, Tucker!” You try to calm him. 
Meanwhile you had your leg swung up and almost outside of the window, the door bursts open and you hear rushed steps. You hurriedly try to crawl out from the window.
“She’s escaping!” someone yells. 
A couple of seconds later, when you’re halfway through the window someone takes a forceful grip on your pants and shoves you back down on the floor. Your ankle is stuck in the bridle. You feel your foot twist and there’s a sudden pain in your ankle. As you hit the floor with your head first there's also a sharp pain in your jaw. It makes you dizzy. 
A painful gasp escapes from your mouth and when you look up, the stall is filled with men once again. You don’t really see who is who, it’s more like dark shadows towering over you. But when your eyes can focus you see one thing, the blonde beard that belongs to the man who burned you. 
“If you only cooperated from the beginning you could’ve had a nice life you know.”
He continues. You spit blood. 
“It’s too late now. If you were a good girl I might’ve decided to keep you.” he says and laughs in your face. “But now, no man alive would even want to touch you with a ten foot pole, not that you’ll leave this stable alive anyway.”
“Mmh…” You sigh, and try again. “Mmhf, f-fuck you.”
“You fucking whore.” He said furiously. That’s the last thing you hear until you feel the harsh pain of a kick in your stomach. Right at your burns. You can almost recall thinking, this is the end, as you once again drift off to unconsciousness. 
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“She can’t have gotten too far on foot, right?” Ellie asks. Joel just hums in response. He hasn’t been feeling up to be chatty with Ellie since you left. There is just a dreary cloud hanging over him these last couple of days.
“Why did she leave, anyway?” Ellie asks again. He decides not to respond at all. “Or like, would you guess why?”
He sighs.
“I just hoped she would’ve said goodbye.” she says and looks out through the car window.
“Me too kid.” he mutters.
When he noticed that you had left he had packed up all the things in the truck and went out to look for you. Ellie had found traces in the snow, and they guessed you followed the road up north. So they stopped every few times to check abandoned buildings for any sign of you. 
They figured you didn’t stay too far off from the road, because they did find evidence of someone staying in sheds, caves in the forest or other buildings they found along the way. You had hidden the tracks after yourself pretty well. But Joel was experienced. He didn’t know much about your time before the QZ, but he had lived out there as a raider. So he did know a thing or two.
And you definitely had left a thing or two behind. You were good, he had to admit. But there were remains of a fire you didn’t have time to put out, for whatever reason. In one of the buildings he found an empty can of food you had brought with you. He knew, because the can wasn’t covered by dust and he was the one who found that specific brand the last time they stocked up. 
It was getting late, and it was time for their last stop for the day. He parked the car close to the road, but well hidden just in case anyone drove by. They hadn’t met even one person or infected for a long time, but he didn’t want to risk it.
“Cabin over there?” Ellie points it out through the trees and raises her eyebrows at him. He just nods and they start walking towards the little timber building.
Someone definitely had been there and left in a hurry. There’s signs of a fire someone tried to put out, very sloppily. As they quickly had to get up and leave. Beside the fire lies the insides of a small animal, rabbit, he guesses. 
He has a bad feeling about this, but enters the cabin anyway, You could be inside of there, hiding. He swings the door open, rifle ready to shoot anyone who isn’t you. But it’s quiet and still. The room is a big mess, practically trashed. He lowers the gun and sighs. Fuck. He hopes this trouble isn’t your trouble, in that case the hope of finding you okay just drastically declined. 
“Woah, look at this Joel!” Ellie exclaims from above. He confusedly looks around and finds her on the edge of a loft. He completely missed it. And he completely missed her climbing up there.
“Who told you to go up there?” he snaps at her.
“It’s her,” she just says and lifts her hand up. She holds a blue book. “She was here.”
She tosses the book down to Joel, and he catches it. Quickly he flips through the pages. It’s a notebook. A diary, dated from before the outbreak. Soon he reaches the last written page, dated to this year. He starts to read.
You had signed off with your name. This was proof. You had been in this very cabin, very recently. You can’t be too far away now.
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December 6th, 2023
Maybe this is what it’s like to be dead. You always thought life after death would be like floating on a warm, soft cloud. Content. Calm. Together with your loved ones that you lost. With Julie. But this is cold, and hard. Your face feels wrong. Swollen. Misplaced. So maybe you weren’t dead just yet?
Your eyes flutter open and you see the ceiling. The same damn ceiling you saw last time. 
There’s a disappointed knot forming in your stomach. You were severely beaten and went unconscious once again. The concept of time is long lost. It’s hard, not having the energy or will to move your body. 
After some time of drifting in and out of consciousness, you can’t tell for how long, there’s a sound of light footsteps on the other side of the wall. Right outside, the snow crunches slowly. Is this real or a hallucination? Once again, you can’t tell. All you can do is lay in your own pool of blood and wait for the end. Every muscle in your body hurts.
When Tucker lets out a curious snort, you slightly open your eyes. If you convinced yourself you might be alive before, this definitely makes you consider the opposite. There’s a face peeking through the metal bars, a small face belonging to a girl. 
“Ellie?” you mumble and feel the world spinning.
“Oh my…” she looks outright shocked. 
“Are you in heaven?” you quietly ask her. Maybe, just maybe, some sort of higher power sent her here to guide you? So you soon could be reunited with Julie, floating on the softest clouds there could ever be. You don’t believe in god, you never did, but you don’t know how to explain what’s happening to you any other way. 
Ellie’s face disappears for a minute or two, but you can hear her. You just blink up at the ceiling trying the grasp what the fuck is happening right now. The door slides open and Ellie is quickly by your side. She drops the heavy padlock to the floor. 
“Stay with me.” she shakes you carefully. You open your eyes even more and try your best to look directly at her. “Let’s get out of here.”
She carefully pulls you up to your feet, quickly slides and arm around your waist and starts walking. You limp. As you leave the stall you glance back, and see a pool of blood on the floor and immediately feel nauseous. 
When the both of you are outside you’re blinded by the sharp light. The white snow burns in your eyes. A couple of steps later you find Joel in the hallway of the main building. The door is open and you see him holding a man down to the floor. There’s something wrong with your vision, it’s doubled and it’s hard to focus. There’s blotches of red in the snow, on the floor, on his hands. 
“Where is she!!!” he yells a few inches away from the man's face as he shakes the guy beneath him. He holds the man’s collar with an iron fist. The whole world spins around, you’re dizzy, but you know what you see. It’s him, it’s Joel. 
Ellie shouts after him but he doesn’t hear her immediately. He punches the man in the face a few times before he jerks his head up and locks eyes with you. He leaves the man on the floor and rushes up to you. He pulls you in tightly, but you don’t have the energy to respond to his embrace. Your entire body is limp. There’s no strength left.
“What the fuck did they do to you?” He mumbles as he breaks away for the embrace to look you over. Your shirt is ripped open in some places, burn marks peeking through the tears of fabric. Your face… however it did look like now -  probably just as horrible as it felt.
You try to speak, but your brain and your tongue aren't cooperating. You try to answer him, but all you get out of your mouth is an incoherent mumble. He looks back down with worried eyes, looking straight into yours. You try to hold his gaze but it’s impossible. 
It feels like someone dims the sun down, like the sun is an old light bulb that flickers out into darkness. You’re exhausted. There’s arms firmly grabbing you, holding you up. You blink a few times and feel that you’re being lifted up as you’re drifting off into the quiet darkness. 
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December 8th, 2023
When you wake up you’re surprised you find yourself in a bed, and not on the cold floor of the stable. You’re covered with blankets, not by dirt in the pool of your own blood. You smack your mouth a couple of times. It’s still dry. 
“He-hello?” you manage so get out. The room is dark. You find a source of light, and try to focus your eyes. The light comes from a gap in the door. 
You slowly sit up a bit so you’re leaning back your weight on your elbows. You clear your throat.
“Hello?” you croak, a little bit louder this time. 
You hear footsteps right outside. The door creaks open and you see the silhouette of a girl. You blink a few times and fall back into the pillow. It’s Ellie.
“Hi, you’re awake?” she asks. 
“Mhm, could you…” you need to pause to cough. “Water, please.”
“Sure, of course.” she leaves the room and soon comes back with a bottle of water. She screws the cap open and helps you take a sip. 
Water has never tasted this good. Ellie sits down on the edge of the bed and helps you dry off the drop of water that escaped down your chin. 
”Sorry.” you mumble. ”What time is it?”
“I don’t know, late.” she just looks at you, like you’re fragile. 
“Where… where are we?” the last memory you have is a blurry mix of snow, blood covered knuckles and large arms carrying you away from the stable. “Where’s Joel?”
“He’s out, he keeps guard of the house. We’re safe but you know, he’s stubborn like that.” she nods and you roll your eyes. You know. 
“We’re at this house, I think this place is called Cora. I found it on the map.” she presses her lips together before she continues. “It’s late, you should sleep.”
You don’t know where Cora is, and you don’t get the chance to ask. She puts the bottle down on the little nightstand next to the bed. She leaves the room and shuts the door, but leaves a small gap. 
“I’m right outside, just tell me if you need anything.”
“Okay.”
You can’t sleep. You lay there bright awake until the sun comes up. If you could, you’d heave your legs over the bed, put on your shoes and sneak right past Ellie and find Joel. But your body hurts too much, so you stay. 
It feels weird being safely tucked in on a real bed. Guarded by the people you left. You’re safe, out of harm’s reach. There’s a pang of guilt in your chest. You don’t deserve this. You really thought that stall in the stable would be the last thing you’d see. That you’d soon be reunited with Julie when you saw the pool of your own blood grow beneath you. You tear up a bit at the thought. This wasn’t how it was going to end. You have mixed feelings about it all. 
After a few sleepless hours on your own you hear mumbling on the other side of the door. After a minute or two, Ellie enters the room. She brought soup. 
“Oh wow, this is way too fancy for me.” you joke a bit and heave yourself up to a sitting position in the bed. You try to accept the tin can but Ellie insists on helping you eat. Classic chicken noodle soup. It tastes delicious. 
“This is all we have for today,” she says apologetically. “Sorry… you must be hungry.”
“Don’t worry about it.” you say and while you give her half a smile someone leans their shoulder against the doorframe, arms crossed. You look up and see Joel. You stiffen a bit and your eyes lock with his. 
“Hi” you say, voice raspy. 
“Hi” he sighs back, worriedly. 
There’s silence for a couple of seconds. There’s so much tension in the air that Ellie has to sense that something must be wrong if you two stay quiet for longer. So you’re the one to speak up, when he doesn’t. 
“I’m fine, I’m okay” you tell him, you don’t know who you’re trying to convince. Joel or yourself. He’s not convinced, the worried look stays on his face.
“Sure” he looks at you straight faced. He doesn’t believe a word you say. You see it in the way his brows furrow and that line between them becomes even more visible. So you opt for a different take.
“How did you know I was there?” you ask. Ellie is quick to answer, and explains that they traced your tracks in the snow and found some of your belongings scattered in the forest. They knew no animal or infected could be behind all that. 
“I told her to stay back but apparently someone doesn’t listen to orders.” He shoots Ellie an accusing glare. He’s not entirely happy with her. 
“Will you please remind me again, who found her?” Ellie argues back. “Who got her out? Without causing any trouble?”
She was right. She was the one who picked the lock and quietly got you out while Joel was outside creating chaos. But Joel doesn’t seem to be too impressed with Ellie’s rescue mission.
“Hey, what if you were hurt?” he’s visibly upset. “What would I tell Marlene then? Oh, yeah, ‘that girl you told me to drag over half the country got herself killed’?”
Ellie gives him a glare and a second later, storms out muttering something you can’t hear. 
“Not too far!” Joel yells after her. He gets an annoyed ‘I know’ back. 
So you’re back to silence. You sit in your bed, fiddling with the hem of the blanket, nervously biting the inside of your cheek. After a minute of Joel just standing there looking at you worriedly, he finally sits down on the bed next to your legs. 
“Did you kill them?” you ask after a while and nervously look up at him. He keeps his gaze down towards the floor. 
He doesn’t answer straight away. He hesitates for a couple of seconds before he clears his throat and finally speaks to you. 
“That’s not important.”
“Did you or did you not?”
“I did.” He's now facing you, instead of studying the flecks of dirt on his shoes. “I don’t know about them all, but I would be surprised if more than one or two got out of there in one piece.”
“I’m sorry if that bothers you.” he adds after a couple of seconds of silence. 
“It doesn’t.” you answer quickly. You think for a second and then add, “I’m glad.”
He just looks at you, a bit oddly and squints a bit. Like he doesn’t believe you. 
“Let’s get you cleaned up.” he just says calmly, back to his usual stone face expression and gets up from the bed and leaves the room.When he comes back he has brought some warm water and a cloth. He cleans your burns and dabs your swollen face with the damp cloth. The piece of fabric is stained red. You flinch at every touch. But you will be okay.
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girlbob-boypants · 11 months
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1 8 9 24 25 🔥🔥🔥🔥
ALRIIIIIGHT let's do this. You didn't specify what so I'll. find something after I copy in the questions and see what i'm dealing with
hm. uh. let's just do 14.
Oh thats a lot of ranting oh. Um. So my rants for this game always get heavier than I expect due to the nature of this game SO
Cw for discussions abuse, racism, and misogyny.
wow it's just like complaining about the DA fandom
1 - The character everyone gets wrong
Honestly? It's Emmy Sulk himself. (Disclaimer that I can only speak through my experiences with the English translation which is known for being either spot on or way off but afaik the main story is better about this)
But his is to the point where even the writing gets him wrong in his second expac imo. Like core parts of his original presentation were that 1. He really loves being dramatic and has a sense of humor and 2. Every aspect of him has been embittered by the loss of his people. His humor is fleeting and spiteful. His view of the world is downright spiteful. This is so important to understand. Emet was not always grouchy and mean, even if he was once serious. And it's no secret even in shadowbringers. He does things out of pity and compassion for the group cause we've amused him. He says this is boring and leaves when we're held hostage. He says he does not view mortals as real people yet his mind palace views us as children rather than the man made creatures of his time.
And people took this and turned it into "oh he's a secretly nice grouch. Teehee he's mister grumpy pants" and ew ran with that and completely fucking NUKED his character in favor of fanon. We didn't even need to see what he was like back when his people were alive but if we were going to, don't tell me that the complete destruction of his people only slightly tweaked his personality. And don't turn his sharp witted best friend into a twink who's only personality trait is "Emmy is actually a good guy I promise". And to have Emmy say he thinks his cause was better but we won so he's putting his faith in us feels so. "Yeah even after getting all his memories back and seeing us in action he still maintains that creating fascist nations with creatures he viewed as subhuman was a good idea but he's your friend now so he supports you."
Literally the worst character arc ever. Imagine taking the "this villain was once kind but lost their way and became cruel and hateful" trope and reversing it into a redemption arc where the entire redemption is "yeah he's always been exactly like this but in another life you were friends so it's okay you can't hate him for what he did to your world"
8 - Common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about
Okay I wrote an entire rant about a character and then realized there's an even worse opinion i hate more so. I'm keeping it cause everything I said is so true but this one is even more important.
Okay so a known fact among 14 fans who can read is that the Xaela au ra are meant to be Mongolian coded. It's not subtle. However it's also incredibly mean spirited. And the worst fandom opinion is that the shitty ways a Japanese studio chose to mock Mongolian culture(s) are funny. There's tribes with beliefs that are, honestly, perfectly normal things clearly being played up for laughs and the fans just clap and jeer along???
Basically the fandom opinion is "SE were so funny for how they wrote the Xaela" when actually it was racism.
Anyone who thinks Thancred is a good father, show me the receipts. Seriously the guy is downright abusive at some points and even if his emotions about it all are fair, his actions aren't. He treats Minifilia just like all of her other captives have, all while projecting his feelings about the last person he failed to protect onto her. And while it makes for a good character arc, she never gets to call him out on it and he never talks to her about it. In fact, instead of talking to her, we get some random Manpain Deadwife dude who vents about his life despite literally not mattering to the plot. And this is somehow more influential to Thancred realizing he should be better than talking to Minifilia is. Even when Minifilia expresses guilt that her being alive means Thancred will never see the person he misses more.
And as touching as their scene is when he gives her a new name that's all her own after he almost died for her is. It's not admission or apology. Minifilia deserved to have him say sorry and to say he was terrified of losing her and almost pushed her away trying to keep her safe.
BUT UNFORTUNATELY HE SUCKS SHIT AS A FATHER AND IM ADOPTING HIS CHILD AND HITTING HIM WITH A DIVORCE (never married)
9 - Worst part of canon
Just like. All of Stormblood? Worst villains, worst coding, worst character development for half the cast. Zenos is literally the epitome of the colonizer nation he's the prince of but the writing goes "noooo he doesn't care about any of that he's just power hungry so there's no commentary!! Him using a Japanese weapon he obtained by murdering and pillaging isn't commentary. Him beating and experimenting on women from colonized nations isn't commentary cause he's not doing it with those motivations!!"
I've spoken a lot about how much I hate every part of this expac. It does nothing well and leads to one of the worst villains everyone obsesses over for being a little silly despite adding nothing to the story and just being a dps check and a voice box in a cardboard cutout.
24 - topic that brings up the most rancid discourse
Yotsuyu. Oh SE made one of their villains a Korean comfort woman? Quick, we better talk about how misogynistic this one character is for not killing all brothel owners everywhere even though those people still being alive means Yotsuyu never used the immense power she had as ruler to hunt them down. She had plenty of time to commit ethnic cleanses tho. Weird how that never gets brought up. Why do people criticize this game like it's a real world and the character are all acting of their own accord and not the product of real people from our world writing things?
25 - common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing
ANYONE WHO WANTS ZENOS BACK NO THE FUCK YOU DONT STOP COMPLAINING THAT THE WRITERS FINALLY HAD A WOMAN ADDRESS HOW TERRIBLY HE TREATS EVERYONE WOMAN IN HIS CONTROL I SWEAR TO FUCK WHY DO SO MANY OF YOU THINK ZERO IS A MEAN BITCH FOR SAYING THE STALKER SERIAL KILLER WAS A BAD PERSON
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tinnchan · 2 years
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@thiansong
EP 1 THOUGHTS!!!!!!! had to go to sleep yesterday but here i am now
first of all i really enjoyed it. but also it made me cry already and i wasn't mentally prepared for that. they said let's see how much trauma we can inflict on this little gay boy in the span of one episode. i'm adopting thian and taking him away from that house. we're going to chinese opera together and i'm buying him all the prettiest hairpins. no but how can you treat a child like that???? he literally was just playing wtf leave him alone!!!!! i want to jump into the screen and protect him with my life
the way the wives are looking at each other with fierce eyes is really funny ngl. and the fake ass cgi snake 💀 when that aunty brewed the potion and healed thian i was about to stan but then she turned out homophobic :/
also the brotherly bond 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 you both mentioned it and i can see it already. when yang asked thian to perform for him??? and said that he'll take him to see the opera even though he clearly wasn't into it himself 🥺 best ally since kindergarten. they mean so much to me already
it is not fair that the ep ended with grown up thian and i won't be able to watch the next ep until monday 😭 btw how old is he supposed to be?
about the tender gay romance it all went by very quickly but i remember a scene where thian is sleeping on a table and the other guy is treating a tiny wound on his finger? at least that's how i saw it. now do i generally like the wound tending trope? not really. but this? this made me go 😳🥺 and also that moment when thian was looking up at the guy with sooo much love in his eyes
- @ahxu-laowen
adding to my first ep thoughts (idk if you got that ask tho my internet kept lagging 😭) i might be crazy but i got some ~vibes~ from the man who told them about the cut sleeves idk what was that about they kept focusing on him 👀 is he secretly gay and in love with tian's dad or what. but imagine being tian and the first time you hear the word homosexual is in those circumstances. and then you hear your mom say that you are acting like that man who got kicked out by your dad and then killed himself and she cries and tells you that you can never ever be like that or you'll lose everything and punishes you. and then you grow up and realise that you are like that man. what kind of future can he see for himself with all this trauma. god this is so fucked up i want to throw hands also idk about bua (?? the mistress really not sure if that's her name or something i cane up with) like she's too good. i don't trust that. she will either do something bad or something bad will happen to her. but for now i like her 🥺 she found out what homosexual meant and immediately bacame an ally sorry for being incoherent akhshks i'm rotating the first ep in my head like it's a microwave. why did i start watching this when i knew i won't be able to continue until three days later 😭😭😭😭 - @ahxu-laowen
First of all, I am so sorry I took this long to reply and deprived Quan of your episode 1 thoughts. This was utterly responsible as co-holder of the cojoint to sir with love, ask box. I shall endeavour to respond much more promptly from now on.
I am so so so glad you enjoyed it! And oof, YES. The first episode was INTENSE. I feel so so bad for Zhang and his lover and young Tian who had to witness this tragedy and it being used against him as a source of shame. Oof. Forever slightly confused that Madam Li saw his very young son dress up as a Chinese opera heroine once and and immediately concluded that yes, this is a raging homosexual in the making. Which, sure, kinda but I hate that she is right in this instance. I want nothing more than to tag along with you as you kidnap young Tian and shower him with the love and affirmation he deserves and a 1000 hairpins. T H E C G I S N A K E S. I nearly dropped the show cause I was laughing too hard but im glad i persevered. THE BROTHERLY LOVE. Let me just say that we must also kidnap Yang because there's no Tian without Yang. They love each other so fiercely it is absolutely the core of the show and my favourite part about it and I cannot wait for you to witness it. They are absolutely everything. When you said tender gay yearning I went "pff...you mean all of their scenes together" but it totally makes sense that it's THAT scene. I am glad that you like Bua but I shall not expand more in case I accidentally spoil you on whether or not she stays wholesome and pure and an #ally. Same thing for the guy who is suspiciously knowledgeable about the legend of the cut sleeve. Mayhaps he is just Mr exposition guy..mayhaps he is more. We shall see. Also...Omg?! I don't know how you are managing because I remember that episode finishing on these shots of a grown up Tian smiling to his notebook and my heart nearly exploded inside my chest I immediately had to click onto the next episode.
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cosmicanamnesis · 1 year
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OOhhh I would love to hear about your hate for the Scarlet Letter!! I read Wide Sargasso Sea from the list in the post and it was okay. Written like a classic so not always the easiest to understand. And I had to read it for a class, which usually make me dislike the books more. Crazy as I am getting a degree in English and literature classes are my favorite.
see that was the only one on the list i'd never actually heard of so i might have to look into it. but yeah i was in the "I'm Here For English/Art/Choir And Nothing Else" camp in school. most of the classics we had to read i either threw my whole ass into (see: The Grapes of Wrath) or i'd give it a couple chapters and then sparknotes it from there (sorry Great Gatsby. baz luhrmann made a very entertaining movie out of u tho)
anyway this song is called I Will Raise Nathaniel Hawthorne From The Grave Just To Kill Him Again (under a read more bc this literally does not matter nd if u liked The Scarlet Letter u can just scroll right on by)
fair warning: this is not a scholarly essay, this is a shitty opinion piece that i'm writing while drinking cheap shit that might maybe qualify as whiskey. that's what you're getting here.
anyway.
my beef with TSL has... frankly very little to do with the actual content of the story, other than the story is just dead fucking boring.
puritans as a subject are boring, esp if you grew up as a person being persecuted by The Church(tm) in modern america (i say, making my first unfounded broad sweeping generalization of the night). like, yeah, No Shit they were religious extremists, have you seen the legacy they left? in that way i can understand how the contemporary or modern reader is supposed to feel sympathetic towards hester. the story is presented like "look at these crazies, look how they treat their women and their community," as if we're not doing the same shit in a different font to this day. pick a point in american history, you'll find hester and pearl there because as a society by and large we have barely progressed.
not to mention the focus of the story is on hester's relationships with dimmesdale and chillingworth more than, yknow, her own development as a fully realized person (rather than a representaion of Theoretical Complexity; a person can be both Sinful and Virtuous). because she isn't one. neither is pearl. pearl, willful and impish, is the personification of hester's sin. pearl is a prop.
does that all make the story timeless? yes, in the worst possible way.
hawthorne explores what it means to be ostracized in the most, like, affluent white boy way. like a frat bro doing shrooms and discovering empathy, hawthorne wrote the scarlet letter to show the concept of Sin And Consequences in a way that other affluent white guys might actually pick up on and say hey yeah that is a little fucked and make them realize other people are, in fact, people. if you are not in that specific demographic (which i can only hope was a purposeful target audience to teach them that message and not hawthorne himself realizing this for the first time) the philosophy is pretty fuckin weak. or. not so much Weak as it is Shallow, but ultimately it's both.
all to say, i was pretty clearly not the target audience here, and i think i have a pretty valid reason to not give a fuck abt TSL. that is not the reason why i so passionately hate this book.
the town i'm from has a pretty significant mormon population. i don't know if you know anything about mormons, but basically, LDS tradition has rules clearly outlining under what circumstances a person is meant to be shunned by the church. one of those conditions is apostasy, when a member officially leaves or is forcibly removed from the church and is declared an apostate by the temple. why do i know this? my best friend for a long time went through this process when they were 16 and living with me because their family kicked them out for being queer. not too long after this, TSL was assigned reading, and the class i was in was like 80% Assorted Christian denominations, the major one being... ding ding ding the fucking mormons.
so. put yourself in my spot. you are having Teacher-Lead Discussions about the topics and morals in TSL and on one side you have queer kids, atheists, Intelligent Troublemakers, etc, and on the other side you have a Protestant Army led by a Mormon Vanguard. nothing will make you hate a book like a dozen kids with absolutely no self awareness.
that segment pretty much boiled down to
"wow can you believe how CrAzY the Church(tm) used to be? :P"
"uh... yeah... you haven't changed."
"WHAT? pshhh OUR denomination is Nothing like /that/, women can wear pants outside of church activities now!"
"ok how do you feel about adultery when one's husband is presumed dead?"
"well. uh."
so to conclude: the Scarlet Letter is a very shallow criticism of early american puritan doctrine and the way that it's treated as a deeply profound classic is more of a reflection on the modern White Patriarchy than it is on the Puritans. and dont get me wrong, i think it's a pretty good subject for a high school lit class, if for no other reason than it teaches kids to recognize how morals and ideals are passed down even over hundreds of years. its a perfect example of that.
book fuckin sucks tho
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stellocchia · 3 years
Text
Since I really enjoyed yesterday's stream I decided to do one of my overly long analysis on it
So, here's my analysis of (DSMP LORE) Healthy Competition
Dialogues will be color-coded as usual, so here's what I used: Phil, Wilbur, Ranboo
As always I am incapable of brevity, so everything's under the cut
The stream starts with a conversation between Phil and Wilbur in which Wilbur admits that he hasn't been to visit Phil in a while, which makes Phil's later threat about throwing him out feel that much more ridiculous since Wilbur clearly doesn't really live with him either way...
"Alright, it's got one for Phil, one for Ranboo, and one for Techno. Is that all that live here? Just you three?" "Yep, just us three, just chilling"
The only reason why I'm singling this out is that it was right after the mention of Techno's birthday and Wilbur was pointing at the seats occupied by the 4 members of the Syndicate so it feels slightly weird that Niki wasn't mentioned at all. But also it's technically not a lie, she doesn't live there and she only comes around for the Syndicate meetings.
Another thing to add is that Wilbur did notice the chest Ranboo left for him and consciously decided to ignore it.
"I must admit I've come to you with a bit of a- a bit of a proposition. You're into propositions Phil? Are you a bit of a 'propositions' kinda guy?" "Oh, depends, depends. You- you've had some pretty... let- let's just say, uh- not- not a great track record on propositions that you've had in the past" "Alright... I mean, I'm trying to move past that"
I wonder what exactly Phil is referring to here. Because, like, Wilbur did bad things, don't get me wrong, but what's his track record with "propositions" in particular? Because he isn't talking about "Tommy, let's be the bad guys" here since he doesn't know about that. Is he talking about Wilbur founding L'Manburg? But then again, I don't think Wilbur interpreted it that way. I think that, from Wilbur's reaction, he clearly interpreted it as a jab at him exploding L'Manburg (which is the one thing he's trying to move past) which would be extremely hypocritical from Phil since he did the exact same thing but worse.
Also, I really do think that Wilbur is trying to move forward. He's lonely and he has the lowest possible opinion of himself so it doesn't feel weird that he'd want to move on. He isn't putting the work in it right now and he hasn't really changed, but he does seem to want to (though I think he may not know how).
"He [Quackity] didn't seem afraid of me, which is cool. Not many people- I mean you don't seem afraid of me. You aren't afraid of me, are you Phil?" (little look into Wilbur's mind and his fear of isolation once again. And this is fear of isolation, he's worried that other people are afraid of him and therefore are only waiting for him to step out of line so that all their fears would be confirmed)
"'Cause I'm not afraid of you [Phil]" (bold words for someone who spent who knows how long lying to his dad because of a crippling fear of disappointment...)
"Technoblade spent his entire time taking down the establishments, what he left is, as predicted, a power vacuum for a new establishment to come in" (in case it wasn't obvious, Wilbur is not the biggest fan of anarchy. And he actually got this one criticism spot on, indeed all taking down L'Manburg did was getting 4 new governmental-like structures to sprout in its place)
"Phil, I want to make a burger van" *Phil sighs and walks away* (I'm more sure now that Phil really meant "creating L'Manburg" as Wilbur's bad track record with propositions)
Wilbur repeating 4 times that he has no ulterior motive with the burger van managed to make me think the exact opposite. That said that ulterior motive may just be to create a safe little home for himself and Tommy for all we know honestly. Also, the whole thing with Phil trying to convince his grown-ass kid to go play with the neighbor kid and Wilbur throwing a tantrum in response was hilarious...
"If he's [Ranboo] shit you gotta come help me okay? If he's shit you've gotta come be burger boy with me, okay?" (he still is mistrustful to an extreme and pretty childish admittedly)
"Why is he [Phil] treating me like a kid?! Why is he treating me like a little baby?" (remembering how Wilbur treated Fundy I think it may be a family problem)
Another interesting thing to point out is that Wilbur was openly scared of the spider attacking him here, and fights it off, but he doesn't move away from the explosion later on and he didn't move away from the exploding creepers last stream. Other people already made this connection, but I do think it may be a sort of way to punish himself. Specifically, it's brought up later on that he thinks he got off easy for what he did, so he's using what he hurt others with (explosions) to hurt himself now as a sort of punishment for that. Which is another indication of just how much his stay in Limbo didn't help with his mental health.
"Am I being- is this [Ranboo having both cows and wheat] a setup?" (the paranoia never left)
"Ranboo I'm gonna go out on a limb here: do- do you wanna be friends?" "Su-sure yeah, I don't see why not" (I think that at this point it was still just Wilbur following along with what his dad told him to do and trying to find out more about Ranboo. That does seem to change later down the line)
"And then we decided that it [the 'cookie' outpost] was too much trouble so we kinda just left it" (So we have confirmation that the cookie outpost was abandoned)
"We're not gonna annoy Quackity" "That's good" "We can't annoy- we can't annoy him because we're simply put- we're simply put gonna be making...- I got the real estate! He's giving me the area and we're gonna be making a competing business"
Wilbur says this as if he wasn't perfectly aware that this would annoy the sh*t out of Quackity. As if the point of it wasn't exactly to annoy Quackity. Or well, annoying him isn't the end goal, it's just the means to an end. We don't know the actual end goal (though I think Wilbur still wants to either be let into Las Nevadas or actually instate a rivalry between them as he said, one of the two).
"We [he and Quackity] were a part of the same cabinet during New L'Manburg or whatever" "Cabinet?" "Yeah a cabinet is like-" "Was this- was this with Tubbo?" "Yeah yeah" (...) "So you were part of the old L'Manburg? I didn't know that actually, I thought you were a bit of an independent"
Once again: Wilbur is missing A LOT of knowledge. He wasn't aware that New L'Manburg had a cabinet and he wasn't aware that Ranboo was ever part of the country either. He has a lot of misconceptions about what happened during the time he was dead so it really shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that his views on a lot of things are as warped as they are. Wilbur is getting to his conclusions with an incomplete and sometimes wrong set of data.
"Do you dislike anyone Ranboo?" "Not too much I don't think. I mean there are other people I don't, like, agree with what they've done of course, but I think that everyone is just a product of what they've gone through and everything so if you understand that then you understand the person!"
There is nothing inherently wrong with Ranboo's reasoning here. It's true that most people are a result of their environment and, once you understand what they've been through you can understand them better as a person. It's also fine that he personally doesn't want to hold grudges. But that way of thinking isn't applicable to those who have been hurt by others, sure they can reach an understanding, but an understanding of a person doesn't justify shit and doesn't change shit unless that person works towards repairing old broken relationships. It just all sounds like a nice way of thinking about things in theory, but in practice, it just takes away responsibility from those who have wronged others to fix things and moves it to those who have been wronged. (Ranboo isn't advocating for everyone to think that way though, but I know the fandom will).
Either way, they arrive in Las Nevadas and Wilbur talks about how their place doesn't benefit the consumer and puts down 3 signs.
"I've been trying to think of a name for it [his and Tommy's area], I'm thinking about 'Paradise'"
There are two possible reasons for the name that I can think of:
1) It's in reference to Las Nevadas itself and how Las Nevadas is based on Las Vegas, the famous city of sin
2) It could be a reference to Tommy insistently calling Las Nevadas Paradise in the last stream and Wilbur trying to convince him that their place is the true Paradise
Wilbur does decide to make the Burger Van right at the border which really feels like a very obvious provocation. The other thing is that he makes it clear that he wants the van to be red and white which could be a random choice, but really feels like a reference to Tommy (since they are famously his colors) or an imitation of their opposition. Or both considering how much Tommy liked the restaurant of the opposition and the fact that Wilbur is still trying to convince him to stay.
"I'm not very fond of blue" (at this point it's obvious that Wilbur has quite a bit of pent-up animosity against Ghostbur. I wonder if it is because it still feels like people liked the ghost more than him...)
"Like, the Cookie Shop, I don't even know if it was a cookie shop, to begin with, because it was a little... fortified if I'm entirely honest, I realize that now" "Really?" "Yeah did you not see- oh wait- that giant stone structure?" (Ranboo really did fail to realize that the cookie shop was actually a military outpost, huh?)
"See, I like Tubbo. He's strong-headed, he doesn't let people push him around, you know?" (this is both an interesting change in what he thinks of Tubbo if he actually thinks that and further confirmation that Wilbur isn't a fan of people he considers to be 'followers')
"Why do you claim that you're so 'peaceful' and 'neutral' and yet somehow appear in almost every conflict this server's had since I died?" (since I saw people claiming this is manipulation already, just know that it isn't. He's just confused because, admittedly, Ranboo is a confusing guy and Wilbur doesn't really know him at all)
"Ranboo, why did you come to help me?" (...) "And then also I just think, you know... you can, you know- I think- I think you're an alright person, you know? So I wanna- I did kinda wanna get off on a better foot with you then what happened-" "Why?" "Just because I don't really like having the thought that people don't really like me" "Nonononono not the bit about the right foot, the 'why don't you think I'm a bad person'" "Well I mean, I think that you did bad things, but like, I think that you also went through things that made you that way and then I also think that you've changed now (...) but I think that now you've- apparently you've been away long enough that I think that if anyone goes away for that long eventually they'll have a thought about their morality and everything and maybe become a better person because of it"
I know this quote was absurdly long, but it is one of the most interesting conversations of the whole stream and it is really important and it tells us quite a bit as well. For one thing Wilbur was left quite emotional from someone simply admitting that he's an "alright person" and that they think he's capable of changing and this does bring him to open up to Ranboo right after. What Ranboo says to be exact is that anyone would have changed after going through what Wilbur went through and that change could be positive and while I completely disagree with it, it's clearly something that Wilbur needed to hear.
Now as to why I disagree with the notion that 13 years of semi-complete isolation could change anyone for the better should be rather obvious. But if it isn't, well, that's torture to put it simply. Psychological torture. Just like abuse it's one of those things that only cause trauma and a worsening mental health state and we see this with Wilbur because he didn't change, he only became more self-deprecating. Hurting someone doesn't make them become a better person all of a sudden, that's really not how it works. Hurting someone makes them become more traumatized.
"I think I scare people" ( as I said, immediately opening up about his insecurities)
"I think that a lot of people share your idea, but they share your idea in trying to- trying to keep me from hurting them" (for a bit here Wilbur talks about how he feels like everyone else is just waiting for him to step a foot out of line, which does really show that he's still interpreting all his interactions with people through the lens of his paranoia and self-deprecation, because no one is really interacting with him with that objective in mind)
"Dream's had his comeuppance and I've not" (this seems to be the crux of Wilbur's insecurity. This idea that he got off scot-free for his crimes, the idea that the only difference between him and Dream is the punishment that's been bestowed upon them which, of course, is wrong, but he doesn't know this, because he doesn't actually know why Dream's in prison)
"I've been investing into the wrong areas Ranboo, I've been investing into the wrong people" (This is either a reference to Tommy, to Phil, to Quackity, or to all of them)
"We're kindred man, we get each other" (the reason why he thinks that is because he seems to think that Ranboo has a similar type of paranoia to what Wilbur experience himself and he's not entirely wrong. Ranboo is deathly afraid of conflict and of being disliked so much so that he never stands up for anything in fear of angering others)
Little definition of "neuroticism" for you all since Wilbur kept mentioning it: neuroticism, one of the Big 5 personality traits, is typically defined as a tendency toward anxiety, depression, self-doubt, and other negative feelings.
I'd say it's quite fitting for both characters...
"I feel like life dealt us the same cards and the difference is that you built your trust by showing people your cards whilst I- I keep them close to my chest and I feel like that may be the big difference" (I felt like this was interesting. Especially knowing how much Ranboo actually doesn't share and how much he actually also keeps close to his chest)
They talk about tubbo in general for a bit and about what's been going on the server in general. Ranboo also that he's part of both Snowchester and the arctic commune (mostly the latter though).
"This has been chill, this has been good, I'm excited to show Tommy. What's your opinion on Tommy?" "Oh, he's- he's great. Tommy's awesome" "I agree I agree" "Definitely gone through a lot but I think that it's made him a good person" "Well you seem to think that everyone going through something at least gives them some merit you said" "I mean, yeah. I mean if- if no one- the only really bad people are the ones who are just evil because- just because and they don't have any reason why"
Included the whole thing here because if I stopped at Ranboo saying that Tommy going through trauma is what made him a good person it would have sounded really bad. As things are I think that that was just poor wording on his part and that this mostly goes back to the mentality he expressed before about how people sometimes do bad things because of the environment they're in pushing them and this idea he seems to have that actual hardships (like 13 years in Limbo or whatever he knows about what Tommy has been through) can encourage people to be better which is... sort of naive honestly. Again, trauma isn't a catalyst for the betterment of a person, and any improvement Tommy has made came from his self-reflection, not what he's been through.
After they're done with the van Wilbur brings Ranboo to their competing establishment and asks him to smash the windows, which Ranboo does with no hesitation whatsoever. After that Wilbur proceeds to place down one single block of TNT in a corner and Ranboo starts being a little more hesitant.
"You trust me right?" (I feel like that was a trick question considering how their common paranoia is the thing that Wilbur praised in Ranboo before)
Wilbur hands Ranboo the flint and steel to detonate the piece of TNT which Ranboo does, albeit with some hesitation.
"You passed the test, good job man, you go back to the van (...) Ranboo- Ranboo... I'm proud of you man. You've taken a side, you've proven that you can choose a side"
Quite a few people have already pointed out how similar this scene was to the time Wilbur tested Tommy in season 1 to decide if he was fit to be his right-hand man. In both situations, Wilbur gave someone a chance to cause some destruction against someone on the opposite side. Tommy passed the test by refusing to do so and showing that he was willing to uphold his morals and what he believed in. Ranboo passed the test by doing the exact opposite, by showing that, as much as he talks about how he chooses people and not sides, he's not willing to prove that even when all he would need to do to do so is doing nothing.
And it's an interesting scene to analyze as a parallel to that, but it's also interesting to note that Wilbur knows about Ranboo and Tommy griefing George together. He knows that Tommy was the only one to face any consequences for it (not that exile was actually the consequence for the griefing, but this is from Wilbur's point of view). Now putting this in the context of Wilbur seeing himself in Ranboo and thinking that he himself got off scot-free explains this next part perfectly in my opinion.
It explains why he made sure to leave this sign:
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To me at least. This is only a theory honestly, we don't have an actual full explanation. But I do think that Wilbur may feel like the both of them never got the comeuppance they deserved, which is why he did something that's sure to get a reaction from one of the most powerful people on the server. Though considering that he also left 2 diamonds as retribution + a chest with all the materials he picked up it could have also been Wilbur's idea of a bonding moment and he could actually really be proud of Ranboo.
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sunjaesol · 3 years
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juke | human au | title: fearless // taylor swift
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As they were walking up the front lawn of her childhood home, nerves wrecked her body. Even her hand, snug in Luke's, felt clammy and sweaty and suffocating. God, this was such a mistake — going home, not him. He didn't even realise what he had gotten himself into by falling for the youngest darling of the matriarch.
Or rather, she shouldn't have fallen head over heels for the swoon-worthy Luke Patterson, but she never really stood a chance.
But everything had happened so fast! One second banter easily flowed between them, warm and easy flirtatiousness without consequences, the next she was at IKEA helping him pick out a bookshelf while he somehow knew whenever she needed pizza and a good cuddle. They were very much in a committed relationship, something the Molina women very much frowned upon.
It wasn't as if they were all deeply scared of love and relationships, but the Molina family was a matriarchy. All women raised families on their own, no man to help. Divorced, cheated on, died, a donor, infertile and therefore adopting children — men were of zero priority.
So, coming home with her boyfriend whom she deeply loved? Definitely a risk. She was surprised he was still standing, that she hadn't scared him enough yet.
Spinning on her heels in front of the door, she shot him an anxious smile. "Are you... sure you wanna do this? We're, like, really intense."
Luke smiled, tender. "Do I wanna meet the family of my girlfriend? 'Course I do." When her expression didn't change, he added, "Jules, just 'cause they all did the 'no guy' thing, doesn't mean you have to follow that, right? And I'm not scared."
Oh, God. His courage was as admirable as it was stupid.
She chuckled, antsy. "You haven't met my mom though."
His smile widened as he dipped down to kiss her, gently, hands caressing her cheeks. For a moment, stress fled her system.
But then the door flew open.
"There you are!" Mom exclaimed, a glass of red wine in one hand and music booming over her shoulder. "And is this the boy toy?"
"Mom!" Julie grumbled, embarrassed to be caught kissing (God, she's twenty-three!) as well as putting Luke in a bad position.
First impression of him: seeing him kiss her beloved daughter on the doorstep. Great.
"Hi," Luke said, dazzling her with a smile while he stuck his hand out. "I'm Luke. And I'm, uh, older? So..."
"Meh," Rose trailed, lamely shaking his hand. "Still a boy toy. Anyway, come in! Food's warm!"
Following her mom inside, Luke shot her a strange look, like it was only registering now all her tall tales were, well, true. Shrugging with a sheepish grin, she placed their shoes and jackets in the wall closet and then made the agonising trek to the loud, jumbled chatter.
As expected, all the California-based Molina women were present. Which meant ten, including her, all staring at Luke like he was a weird specimen. Her hand squeezed his beneath the table in support, and he was finally squeezing back just as tightly.
Was it bad she felt some sick pleasure he understood how fucked he was? Probably. It seemed warranted.
When everyone had their plates filled, the interrogation began.
"So, Luke, how old are you?" Victoria asked.
"Twenty-five."
"Going around town with a twenty-three year old?" She sniffed. "Interesting..."
"Do you have any siblings?" Donna inquiried.
A wry grin ticked up his lips, sensing the irony of the situation. "I, uh, I'm an only child, actually. Mostly raised by my dad, 'cause my mom worked long hours."
Shoving a fork of meatloaf in her mouth, Julie withheld a guttural wince at his words. Luke Patterson was the poster child of everything the Molina's didn't like and she brought him in their cave.
"What do you do for a living?" Abuela croaked, peering intensely.
His smile didn't falter, but instead widened. "I'm in a band, but I also bartend a couple of nights a week."
"A band, huh?" Mom leaned forward, intrigued. "Has Julie told you I used to be in a band?"
"How can I not, mom?" Rolling her eyes, Julie added, "You'd tell him anyway..."
"I was in The Petal Pushers, the best protest punk-rock feminist group of the 90s." Her fist punched in the air as she spoke and Julie could imagine the fingerless leather gloves and purple streaks as she did. "What kinda... band do you have?"
Her endearing Luke didn't read the warning signs humble himself, so he enthusiastically perched himself at the end of his chair as he said, "Punk-rock too, actually! Yeah, we're really killing it right now at all the clubs."
She smirked. "I'm sure you do."
"What are your plans with Julie?" Elena asked, one of her cousins.
Both her and Luke froze at that. Shit. That... was not something they've discussed. A relationship of seven months was still pretty fresh, not ready for a confrontational talk about futures and plans.
He scraped his throat, briefly let his gaze flicker to her, and then uttered, "I'm, uh, a one day at a time kinda guy."
Julie cringed, not hiding it this time. To her, it was an alright, albeit lame answer. But to her family? Horrible. So, so horrible. Gah, she had to put an end to this!
Abuela scoffed, nearly choking on her hard seltzer. "One day? At a time? What is this, the 70s? My little girl deserves more than carpe diem!"
Mimi hissed. "Wrong, wrong answer, boy toy."
The questions kept shooting at lightning speed, each one more outrageous than the other, while Julie's grip on her fork tightened and tightened in anger.
"How many times a week do you shower?"
"What's your least favourite colour?"
"Do you pick up women? Is that how you make extra money?"
"What's your view on children?"
"Can you handle spice?"
"How did you even find our darling, huh? Did you lure her into that bar of yours?"
"Is Luke short for Lukas, or Lucrative?"
"Alright, enough!" Julie screamed, standing up with a stomp of the foot.
A hush crossed the table, aghast and surprised, her mother perpetually amused as always (too many in drugs in the 90s, she presumed) while Abuela feigned to be sleeping. 'Resting her eyes' would likely be the excuse.
"This is insane! Stop acting like this and start treating Luke with a little respect!"
From the corner of her eye, she vaguely noted he was staring at her, gobsmacked. He did well, given the circumstances, but she couldn't just idly sit there and let him take all this shit.
Mom puffed, leaning back in her chair. "We haven't been disrespectful, Julie."
"You have, mom! Can't I just have a boyfriend without—"
"We've invited him," she interrupted. "That's enough of a courtesy."
And before Julie could fire back, furious beyond belief, Rose added, "You know how the Molina cookie crumbles, honey. No men stay. Not for long, anyway."
That smug response made her explode. "Mom! Can you just for once—?!"
"I love her though," Luke quipped, shy.
The fight halted instantly, all ten women gawking at him like he just spoke a new language.
And he did, to Julie at least. Luke loved her? Even after all of this? She obviously knew he wasn't impartial to her, those seven months equalling tenderness and partnership like nothing she's ever experienced before, but... love? He was in love with her?
How could she abide by the 'Molina Women Rule!' rules when he confessed that, no hesitation or stutter heard?
And so, Julie's heart melted. "You love me?"
"Of course, I do," he whispered. "Why else would I be here?"
Elena nodded, sympathetic. "Good point."
Unable to stop her smile from becoming a dazzling, lovesick beam, she repeated his words with as much conviction as she could muster. "I love you too, Luke."
Abuela shot up from her sleep with a cough and a snicker. "Yeah, right."
Mom waved her glass around, congratulating them. For the first time tonight, her tone held kindness instead of poorly veiled contempt. "That's very sweet, Luke. Tell me in seven more months how you're feeling then."
Though Julie couldn't expect her to suddenly change her ways. Damn.
Mimi scowled. "We're letting 'I'm a one day at a time kinda guy' slide?"
Disgruntled chatter rose again, and that was her cue to go. Tapping Luke's shoulder, she mouthed home — something she hadn't done before and wasn't sure which apartment she meant either, but it left flutters in her chest regardless — and he nodded in understanding.
Oh, God. He loved her. That still hadn't set in.
"And if you'll excuse us, me and Luke are going," Julie continued. "Thanks for dinner, mom."
The woman laughed, baring all her teeth. She clearly had a fun time. "See you at Victoria's birthday, mi amor. And Luke? Who knows!"
He forced a chuckle at her remark. Awkwardly bouncing on his heels, he waved at all the ladies. "It was really cool to meet you all. Now– now I know why Julie's so incredible. So... thanks." A true smile appeared. "This was great."
No one said anything after that. Abuela gurgled her drink and her cousins prodded at their leftovers, mom peering at her like she was trying to find something. Sometimes, Julie and Rose were so alike, and other times, they were complete strangers. She liked that. It kept dinners like these exciting, she supposed. Mom seemed to think the same.
They bid goodbye one last time with a kiss on the cheek, and then they hurried out the door. A giggling breath left as the cool wind hit her skin. Luke was buzzing with adrenaline, unable to keep his limbs still.
Clambering in her car, the comforting quietude wrapped around them as the doors slammed shut. A beat passed. No one spoke.
"What the fuck," he whispered, horrified. "What the fuck. What the fuck did just happen? What the fuck—"
Julie squealed. "You love me!"
"That's what you got from that?!"
"Of course!" Her arms curled around him, teasing. "You love me!"
"That shouldn't be the most surprising thing tonight, Jules," he grumbled, though a playful shimmer sparked within his beautiful eyes. "I thought I was, y'know, obvious."
She shrugged, bashful. "It's always nice to hear, no?"
"Oh, man," he sighed, eyes flickering across her face as though he couldn't decide what to focus on, as though she was indescribably stunning. Her heart swelled tenfold at the thought. "I love you, Julie. So fucking much. Even with your crazy family."
Laughing, she reached forward and kissed his lips, fingers pressing in his neck and their silly grins preventing them from deepening the warm touch.
"Let's go," he mumbled, noses nudging, eyes hooded and pouring with the love she somehow hadn't noticed before. "Before they're ready for round two."
But before he could move away, she kissed him again, better this time, and cherished his sigh when they slowly seperated.
"I love you too," she whispered. "Like, a lot."
He grinned, breathless. "Good to know."
Victoria's birthday was four months later, and Luke attended as well. And also for Mimi and Elena and mom and Abuela and Donna and every other Molina member. And when Julie got surprised with a 24th birthday party, she figured out Luke and mom combined their powers to host it.
Molina women were independant and lived life by their own rules... which included Julie.
Loving Luke Patterson unconditionally probably made her the most unique Molina of all.
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@bluefirewrites @blush-and-books @ourstarscollided @thedeathdeelers @pink-flame @constantly-singing @willexx @unsaid-emily
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fayeimara · 3 years
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Meant To Be Series || One For Every Billion
Episode 4. If You're A Masochist
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Putting your phone away after posting your latest update, you look around one more time for either of your cousins. The oldest, Ren, had left you with his brother Shin, strictly telling him not to leave you alone before he met back up with you both. But then you convinced Shin to call the car and drop off the bags you'd overloaded him with, agreeing to meet back here this cute café. It had been pretty easy to convince him, seeing as how you could barely make him out over the bags and boxes of items you'd bought for your friends and family back home. It was fair play, after all, you'd brought just as many gifts with you for your cousins here when you'd arrived.
Smiling as you tip the cup of coffee up to your lips, you consider if you've harassed him enough for the day or if you should top it off by ordering him something he'll hate just to see that distressed look on his face. He deserves it for the prank he pulled on you a few days ago, when they picked you up from the station, literally scaring you half silly when he snuck up from behind you, grabbed you, and started to run. You were pretty worried because not a single person in the busy terminal had tried to stop him even though you were clearly (momentarily) terrified and not aware of who had 'kidnapped' you until he'd finally put you down. You guess you should have expected this with him though, given you both have always messed around with each other, pulling fun pranks and stupid stunts, since the two of you were kids, but you'd gotten completely complacent since you'd last seen these oh so lovely cousins of yours.
If there was any doubt on whether you had any payback planned for Ren, well, he was the one who'd grabbed not only your bags but also several pictures of your embarrassing slip in composure, i.e. your briefly terrified face, and shared it with the world. So yeah, you were sure he was sleeping with an eye open for the time being, which is why you would call on your considerable patience before hitting him subtly and satisfyingly when he least expected it.
With that in mind, you head back to the counter to place another order and then ask if there are any specialty dessert shops in the area. Happy to hear of one pretty close, you're sure you'll be able to quickly head over and back before Shin returns.
The shop is as incredible as promised because it only takes them about ten minutes to prepare your custom order of mochi with a spicy twist. Trying one out, you can't help but enjoy the sweet flavour and texture even if you're disappointed that it doesn't seem to have the effect you were hoping for, until you feel the heat slowly build the more you chew. Oh. Oh my. Oh my g- Mouth burning, you quickly gulp at the coffee still in your hand to try and relieve the pain. Okay so.. it's perfect! Cue evil laugh.
You thank the brilliant artisans, because that's what they are, and promise to leave a review on your way out. It's not until you're walking by an alley (how typical, right?) between shops on your way back to the cat café, that you're pulled from your thoughts of not-so-sweet revenge.
"Give it up, kid." It's nothing alarming at first. Not until you hear the next cry.
"Don't touch me! Leave me alone!"
Um. What?
You've stopped even before you turn your head to look in at a couple older guys surrounding a little kid. Seriously, what's with the cliché? You honestly thought this only happened in anime but you guess dummies always prove people wrong.
Debating who you should call, because you're not going to assume adding yourself to the equation alone is going to be any help, you quickly look around only to realize that the only people passing by near or across the street either don't seem to care, or aren't the kind of people you'd feel comfortable asking for any assistance from. People can call you out on stereotyping but really, where's the kind but strong elderly gentleman or tough, no nonsense, do-gooder woman when you need one??
"Hey!" The tears in the kid's voice draw you back, with your head whipping around to witness one of the bullies reach out to grab his collar. Quick kid, he manages to dodge even if barely but he's about to be blindsided by one of the other guys.
You don't even have time to sigh at your stupidity as you run up between them as fast as you can, slapping the second guy's hand away from where it was reaching for the kid's arm.
With that loud sound and dramatic entrance, all eyes are now on you, but the element of surprise does provide enough time for you to pull the boy behind you and back the two of you up a bit so you're both not completely surrounded.
Okay, this kid barely reaches over your hip, he can't be older than about 6 or 7 maybe, what's he doing here alone?
"Well, well. What do we have here?" The first guy that had tried to grab the kid's collar studies you. You want to say his voice is annoying or that he's an ugly creep but he's just an average guy of about a few years older than you. The only distinct feature are his glasses and that's probably because you don't typically think of wannabe thugs in glasses. Again, so sue you for you conventional stereotypes, but you're in a kind of delicate situation to be worried about thinking inside the box.
"Why don't you tell me," You shoot back, pretty upset about this pathetic tableau, "since it looks like three guys old enough to know better than to bully little kids."
The third guy hasn't done much until now but he laughs at your statement and, okay, at least his laugh is kind of annoying, like a dumb donkey's braying. You hope he's trying to fake an evil laugh or something and that's not his real one? Seriously, it sounds forced and fake so you hope for his sake it really is or no one will trust him once they hear it if that's all he has to work with for the rest of his life. You're tempted to say that to his face, but you've also been told by your friends that your reckless impulses tend to escalate the situation when you need the opposite so you hold back.
Because you're outnumbered. With only a crying kid at your back, quite too literally.
"Oh no, we're not bullying him. He's my kid brother, you know? We were just messing with him since he was being a brat and grabbed the new games we just bought."
You hesitate, thinking it over. Did you make assumptions and jump in too fast? He didn't call out for help or say anything specific to indicate he didn't know these guys. You don't want to turn away to look him over, but he had been holding something clutched against his side.
You feel a little hand clench into the back of your dress and a couple tugs follow, so without turning away, you cast your gaze down and meet teary hazel eyes that are peering up with a little hope among the fear, "He's lying, oneesan, I don't know them."
"Ahh, stop lying and dragging the nice, pretty girl into this." Second guy speaks up, trying to reach around you to grab the kid, but you quickly shift the both of you back a bit more. You realize the wall is just behind you, if the kid's gasping sob means anything. You're out of space to maneuver.
So...you're in a tough spot, you've got your hands literally full and you're up against three guys that are definitely living up to your first impression of them. You don't really have time to think it over as 'glasses' loses patience and reaches for you directly, grabbing your arm that's holding the trick mochi and trying to pull you forward. "What's this? Maybe we should take it for the trouble you've added by interfering in a family issue."
"How about this instead?" And before you can pity the loss, you've thumbed off the lid to your delicious hot coffee that you guess won't get to finish drinking, and toss it in his face.
"Arhggh!" Wow, high pitched for a tough guy, but you really can't think about that right now. Goodbye, coffee, your sacrifice is appreciated.
"What the hell, you crazy b-"
"Don't bother, dumbass, it's probably not hot enough to permanently scar him at this point." True story, you like your coffee cooled down more than most.
They're staring at you like you're crazy but it's really just the recklessness you're known for. Although you should have held on to that reminder of your friends' warnings that ran through your head earlier because the situation has definitely been escalated if the mean, hateful looks that are appearing from behind their fake polite masks are anything to go by. They clearly weren't even trying that hard to pretend. While the second guy is supporting his friend who's flailing, 'Fake laugh' reaches for you, this time angled for the collar of your dress or even your neck, "You stupid bitch."
Oh okay. Well, I'm so sorry for my impertinence, god. This is payback for the mochi prank, isn't it? You actually roll your eyes upwards for a split second with that thought.
Then you prepare to drop the maybe-unlucky box for the coming fight but just before his hand reaches you, another suddenly shoots out and grabs it. Hard.
"Don't you know how to treat women, buddy?" Wow, now that's a nice voice.
Shifting your eyes to your left without turning your head, you catch sight of a handsome bedheaded guy about your age. You would probably be all heart eyes in any other situation- who are you kidding? This is literally the perfect situation.
"I don't think he does, but that's probably because he has zero experience with them." Yay, your mouth can run freely with your attitude now that you have some back up. Not that it stopped you earlier, though..
This new guy shifts his gaze to meet yours and looks pretty surprised at your smirky smile (yes you're calling it that). Why so surprised though? You guess you should have been crying or even praising this god for stepping in. Whatever, he's just a boy. Even if he is drool worthy.
He studies you and pauses briefly on the redness marking your wrist from where one of the guys had grabbed you and then his golden eyes flick down to the boy hidden behind you before focusing a steady stare back on the bullies, "I think you should leave before I really get pissed off."
He must be a magician because they vanish pretty fast after his low declaration, supporting their friend who's managed to wipe most of your precious coffee off of his slightly reddened face. Looks like, he'll live to be a dumbass another day. Could've told them that and avoided the escalation. Oh wait, you pretty much did, right?
The guy is turning back to you after watching them leave the alley and you reach for the little kid with the hand that once held your coffee. Feeling his little hand slip into yours, you start to walk the two of you towards the street while keeping your body angled so you don't completely turn your back on this new guy. You swear the amount of times you've had a situation like this turn into something unexpected is a little unnatural. "Wow. Well... Thank you, stranger, for your help."
He narrows those stunning eyes on you but you don't think he's angry, just a little confused for a moment, before he realizes you're equally wary of him. He moves out of the alley after you both, but thankfully not too closely, because you have to turn your back on him so you don't trip or walk into anyone once you reach the main street.
"It's Kuroo. Kuroo Tetsuro."
You silently startle around at the sound of his voice coming from a lot closer to you than expected but compose yourself quickly so as not to offend him by whirling around in alarm.
"Oh, uh.. nice to meet you." Okay, you both should be safe now. You turn back to face him and the kid is now glued to your side, tiny hands gripping your dress with both hands, one at your back and one at the front. At least it's not silk because that would leave quite the wrinkles. "Anyways... we have to get going now to find whoever lost this little guy."
His arm moves up, rubbing his hand in his hair at the back of his sheepishly tilted head. Probably can't get his hair any messier at this point. "That would be me."
"What?" You raise a disbelieving eyebrow. Always the unlikeliest odds with you and really, what are they anyways here in this situation? But it turns out he's not kidding and you're not misunderstanding.
"I'm the one who lost him. That's my little cousin you're trying to walk away with."
"Hey!" You protest his teasing implication, before looking down at the boy. The other guys tried this too, though.
So you delicately crouch down (aware you're in a dress and heeled ankle boots that could spell impending disaster if you lose your balance) to make sure you're at eye level with the kid. He's not crying anymore, but not looking happy or relieved either. Just staring back at you steadily, a little like the calm gaze of this other guy, actually, but let's not go with confirmation bias. Maybe he's just not an overly excitable kid to begin with.
"Do you know this guy?" You ask softly. He told the truth before, under the stress of a pretty scary situation, after all.
He looks over and up at the tall teen claiming to be his cousin before nodding. "Oh." You give the little boy a reassuring smile before leaning in to whisper in his ear, "Can I ask your name?"
And when you turn your ear to him so he can whisper a reply, you hear, "Itsuki."
Giving him another sweet smile, you stand back up and he's glommed right back onto your side. You meet the bedhead's eyes with your own slightly narrowed but steady too, and settle on a serious expression with an eyebrow raised. He hasn't looked away from you even once but that's fair considering you might actually be trying to take away his little cousin... whom he's lost already once today, if we're all being honest.
"What's his name?"
He raises an eyebrow to match yours, stance indicating he's in no rush but expression definitely amused, "You mean Itsuki?"
"Yeah.. okay, then." You look back down at the boy who's reluctantly releasing you as Kuroo moves closer to you both, your smile back on my face. "It was really nice to meet you, Itsuki. Thank you for being so brave and strong back there. I couldn't have sent those bullies away without you!"
"Or me?" Kuroo asks but it's not really a question more like an amused statement sliding into remind you that he did save you both in the end. Isn't he a little too close for politeness?
"I suppose." Now you have tilt your head back to look at him again. Argh, why is it like a compulsion to just stare your life away when you look into those eyes? "Thank you, then.. Kuroo."
"Not that you needed my help." Ohh, he's smirking at you and it. is. something. "You looked like you were mostly holding your own before I stepped in."
You laugh, because he's really just being nice and you don't know what expression your face might make after seeing his smirk if you don't pick amusement, "Pretty sure it was painfully obvious who brought the most advantage on our side if it came to a fight... and it wasn't me."
"Oya? Our side, huh? And what's your criteria for assessing that advantage?"
And before you can stop yourself, his question has you looking him up and down like.. like you're checking him out. Cue your blush. Ugh. You pass it off and try to push through, "What? I'm not supposed to notice that you have the physical advantage over me?"
Yeah, you worded that deliberately and wouldn't change it for anything because it's so worth it to see the red lightly tint his own cheeks. Yeah, I see your thoughts went there.
"Anyways," You start to step backwards, "Really, thank you."
You turn away to walk over to the coffee shop just another door down.
"Wait," You look over to see both Itsuki and Kuroo catch up to you quickly, the latter now holding on to the former gently but firmly, "I should be thanking you. You did step in to help my cousin when not many others would."
"Oya?" You copy his cute phrase with a look at him from the corner of your eyes and a teasing smile of your own, "How do you know he didn't step in to help me?"
"Somehow I doubt that." The three of you come to a stop in front of the coffee shop and Kuroo's distracted for a second, "Wait, this is your stop?"
"Yeah, why?"
He chuckles, "Ours too. We'd just stopped in here ourselves when Itsuki wandered away." We?
"Oh, I was here a little earlier too, but I needed to grab.." You lift the box, ".. this, for someone. I left my order here though."
"You lose your coffee often or just an addict?"
"Haha. Neither. It's... a thing. You'd think I'm horrible if I explain."
"I doubt I'd ever think that at this point. Can I pay for your new order and you can tell me about it over your next cup? You know, as a thank you for putting yourself in a dangerous situation for my cousin." Why does he make that sound both grateful and like a stern admonishment at the same time?
"I covered it already and it wasn't really for me. But I really appreciate the offe-"
You're cut off by the door opening and Shin bursting through with a very exasperated look on his face. Whoops, guess you took too long. He immediately starts complaining, "Where have you been?! Imagine my worry when I arrive here and you're gone! You promised you'd wait here."
Another guy has walked out behind him but you ignore that because you see that Shin's holding the drink you got him, but that has your name on it, and can't help but point out both literally and dryly, "Clearly so worried, you picked up my order in the meantime?"
"Hey, there are two drinks so I figured one was mine! But they're both awful!" Of course he tried them both. His face turns into a sad pout, "Why would you order such sour drinks when you know I hate them! And I know you do too! So... do you really hate me for that little thing? You've been so mean today."
You chuckle because this is literally the perfect opportunity. Well, actually, Kuroo is still standing by politely with Itsuki, watching you both with interest, but that other guy has walked up to them and is now also standing there. Is he gaming out here? Never mind.
You give Kuroo an apologetic smile with a finger held up to indicate you'll be a moment and then turn back to offer the box you've been holding onto this whole time to your dear cousin. "I can't imagine why you'd feel that way, but I did get you this, too. You can't have it all though, it's also for Ren."
He reaches for the box when you pop it open and happily exclaims, "Mochi? Aw, I take it back, you're the best!" before proceeding to pop two in his mouth. Oh. Uh-oh.
Okay then, closing the box, you walk back over to Kuroo as Shin happily munches away behind you. "Sorry, yes, I appreciate the offer but as you can see, I have my hands full with-"
"Ahhh! OMG, my mouth is burning!!! What is this?" Is he crying? He's definitely chugging that 'horrible' drink. "I take it back that I took it back. You do hate me. And for what?! I'm sorry I tried to kidnap you, okay?! Ahhh! Make it stop-"
He keeps rambling, even while alternating between choking down the sour drink and pausing for quick panting breaths every now and then, as tears actually run down his face. Even the gamer boy is momentarily distracted watching. You can't help the satisfied smile that stretches across your face as you watch Shin dissolve into tortured agony from the corner of your eyes and finish your sentence "-a pretty troublesome commitment already."
Kuroo looks a little worried but definitely way more amused, "I thought that box was something really special, the way you held onto it the whole time."
"Yeah, even in exchange for my precious coffee-" You wipe away a pretend tear and swear he mutters 'so you are an addict' under his breath before you finish, "but it was worth the revenge, wouldn't you say?"
"Well... He tried to kidnap you?"
"Ugh, don't ask. It was a stupid prank that I briefly fell for. But I think he won't try getting me back for a while. At least a week of peace."
"So.. don't mess with you, is what I'm hearing."
You laugh at his accurate interpretation, "Pretty much. Or do, if you're a masochist."
He looks slightly awed and a whole lot intrigued when he states, "At first I thought you were some incredible angel.. but you're pretty much more an incredible devil, aren't you?
"Incredible, either way? I'll take it." You smirk, thinking of the irony he'll probably never understand.
"How about my request for a name?"
"Isn't it Kuroo Tetsuro?"
"I'm asking for your name, Kitten." He's a little exasperated and just a smidge embarrassed that you made him spell it out. I mean, you like that he's all witty and smooth but... you really like a guy's direct side, too.
You do still smile and tease a little more, "Kitten could work, given the irony..." He gives you an unamused look, but you were continuing anyway, "But since you asked so nicely.. I'm Y/-"
"Oi!" Ren is standing across the street with the car, door open, "I've been looking for you. It's time to go."
"Oh," You look back at Kuroo who's still looking at Ren a split second longer before focusing back on you, "I'm sorry, I have to go!" You smile at him apologetically then face Itsuki, slightly crouched, to give him a bright smile, "Bye Itsuki! Take care and don't wander off again!"
You don't have time to say anymore than those goodbyes to the pair of cousins before your own is dragging you away, cursing you out and swearing he'll get you back. He's listing a lot of pretty creative ideas, silly boy, you'll just use them before he can.
You check both sides of the road as he's pulling you across since it doesn't look like he's going to but you both make it safely to Ren who just gives the two of you a droll look. "You guys definitely didn't listen to me."
He didn't even pose it as a question. You just shrug and give him a kiss on the cheek before sliding into the back of the sleek car, followed by Shin and then Ren, who calls out to let the driver know to take you all home. Maybe you glance out the tinted windows to steal one last look at Kuroo before the car starts to move away. Maybe you see that he's looking too, he's staring at the car but his mouth is moving and when it stops, the gamer boy says something back.
The last thing you see before the car pulls away completely and you can't see anymore is Itsuki pulling Kuroo back towards the café and he takes one last look your way before heading inside with his friend following.
You turn back around, not realizing you'd shifted your whole body. Ren is looking at you oddly so you just raise an eyebrow at him, but smile when Shin happily exclaims, "Hey Ren, we got you some treats too!"
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Masterlist
Behind The Scenes!
-Kuroo not only didn't get Y/n's name, but was pretty curious as to her close relationship with the two guys that we know as Shin and Ren
-If she had to measure, Y/n felt about the same level of attraction and connection with Kuroo as she did with Oikawa when she first bumped into him at the boba shop; he was interesting but still just a casual, fun encounter in the end
-Gamer boy was obviously Kenma, yeah?
-Is it funny for anyone else that Bokuto is liking or retweeting the posts about Y/n? Or is it just me because I clearly know too much?
-Itsuki is non-canon, if you weren't sure :(
A/N: I really like how this one turned out, I don't know why. It could have something to do with the fact that I've been a Kuroo simp the longest but I dunno, it just... flowed. And I barely even chewed over the edits.
Btw, if you guys ever see first-person POV (my, me, I, us, we) or 'Faye', it's probably a good time to restate that this started out as a purely self-indulgent imagining, which is why I write most seamlessly as myself in the scenarios. I then change it over to 'Y/n' and reader perspective during multiple levels of edits so you all can hopefully enjoy the story/scenarios too, but it can (and likely will) still slip through sometimes. Just let me know, and I'll fix it, thank you :) <3
Taglist: @delusivist
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After a Longass time, I'm gonna make a response post to a post from @itsclydebitches. Not sure if I'll acknowledge All
Of it, but still..
1.Thats, the opposite of what the First episode shows, the first episode shows that the Military presence in Mantle dosent really do anything to actually help them with the Grimm. With it even being joked about as usual for the Military by Nora. The next episode also states that wasn't even the reason James had for it. It was to handle the 'eventual' Panick.
2.This and the recurring point of this later on is something I kinda want to address, because it's sort of what I was trying to say in My ask but I should go into more detail.
The point is basically that If James was shady for what he did, then So is Ruby for being willing to work with him for that long...I kinda want to mix this with a different Criticism I heard. That Ruby not trusting Ironwood was horrible and ungrateful because of all the good stuff James had done and how sympathetic and well meaning he was. The issue is that they are both 2 halves of the picture that ignore the other half, wich was what the heroes actual response was.
Him being sympathetic, clearly just trying to help and all the Good stuff he was doing is why they are willing to work with him and help with things. But Ruby didn't like his shadier actions either, wich is why she didn't trust him completely. And also? ""Nora dosent agree...But Ruby, the leader, does. She pushed Ironwood to finish Amity somwhow", that....isnt What happens, we see After Nora yells at James, ruby walks up to him and tells him more calmly that his actions, his management of Mantle and such were only helping Salem and it's what was making it easy for Salem to frame him. And earlier on we saw her with the other protags suggest working with Robyn. That's not 'Reaping the benefits of his actions even if they don't like them', that's not liking some of his actions but still trying to Understand him, and hope to reason or talk him down. Basically...Well it's a display that the other charachterization for Ruby, that she was a judgmental child who considered anyone who went beyond her standard of perfection to be Evil, isn't true. She tries to help and Understand James because she knows despite his flaws he is trying to do good, she tries to reach out to him and get him to see his actions were flawed.
Hell, the Jobs they were actually given were jobs where they could actually help soften the consequences of James actions, like Ren and Nora guarding the wall. the Robyn thing was a direct display that they weren't just doing anything James asked or were perfectly fine with his morally ambiguous actions. When ordered to attack a Huntress who was just trying to help, they instead went against his orders and even tried to actually fix things in a better way.
3.This is a few different issues, I'll start by saying that, that wasn't Ozpins problem in the Previous Volume, Some fans and some of the Heroes in there Angrier times think that, But the big thing was basically that Ozpin wasn't trusting anyone With that Info, that's what separates it from Rubies situation with James, Ruby wasn't trusting James because he actually did have many traits that made him look untrustworthy. And...well Finishing Amity and the plan is not pointless even with Salems immorality. Ruby dosent 'Know' That her being immortal means that the whole plan is pointless for 2 reasons, 1 is that she never had the mindset that it made it all pointless, she was actually distinctly against that when the others thought that under the Apathies influence, and makes her stance clear later, that Salem being Unkillable doesn't mean she's unstoppable. And 2, she dosent 'Know' that because....Its not true. Even if they can't directly kill her like James is planning...Were explicitly, directly told in Salems first actual appearance in the show that Humanity United was a threat and that was why she was going to ensure she divided them. Not to mention that...It isn't even all about the plan? It's made clear that global communications being down was a really bad thing and fixing that alone would help.
4.Im just gonna address one point here...It was not 'The Majority of Mantle' Being taken, were told that they were not even close to being done evacuating.
5.Basically what I said at 2, But to also state, James wasn't an Unambiguous Bad guy in Volume 7, He was in the Wrong In Volume 7, but he wasn't meant to be a Villain yet. The point of James charachter is basically he's someone who meant well but was highly flawed and made bad decisions, and instead of growing from his mistakes, he doubled down on them and let his flaws consume him. I'll get to it more later, but, that doesn't mean he was always evil or meant to be, Also...Jaunes license was given to him by James but, he was not part of the Military being fused with Huntsman, especially by this point. And with Winters words in her and James fight, I have my own issues with that fight or Winters Arc, but I don't think that point holds up either because we weren't meant to see Winter as unambiguously a good guy in Volume 7. Her words in there fight was after she had changed, that dosent mean we're supposed to believe she was a hero while working under James. It just means her POV changed after leaving him, now she wasn't following her programming of being blindly obedient anymore. Penny called out Winter for her being willing to follow through with euthanizing the Winter Maiden, Marrow calls her out in Volume 8 asking the Weiss question.
6.Well, to answer the questions there, were told in episode 5 what the recources were. Clover says how they were taking 'Construction resources', were told this again by Penny in the Car ride, wich makes total sense. They are changing Amity so that it could serve as a shuttle, so needing Construction stuff makes sense. While we may not be told how much power James had explicitly, they do give us a decent idea, that he had way more then he should. It's said in the Council meeting that they set in Checks and balances to keep him from overstepping with his seats, and that he basically just Ignored them to pull the actions he did in Volume 7. And Watts gives us both one Major decision that shows James flaws and gives a Clue as to part of the reasons Mantle was crappy as it was, saying how James updated most of the code in Atlas after the fall of Beacon, but 'As Usual' None was updated in Mantle. Aside from showing a...Truly Spectacularly callous move on James part, it also gives a big clue as to part of the reason Mantle is as crappy as it is, That Atlas and James basically treat Mantle like an afterthought and neglects changing things there to make things better, resulting in the City's state that we see. And, I imagine that being surveillanced and patrolled almost constantly wouldn't be ideal, and it's established by Winters line in that first episode that not cooperating with Personal was a punishable offense. I think you also....Picked a really bad example with Rhodes, if anything, Rhodes is probably a perfect demonstration of why being complacent or loyal to a system is bad for Huntsmen. I think if he would have loved to help Cinder more, it's just that he was loyal to the System and wasn't doing anything to upset the status quo despite knowing it was wrong. If issues like that existed, then it makes James specialist program, wich is specifically supposed to be Huntsmen trained to be loyal to the system, an even worse idea. Also I sort of feel like the bits at the end are sort of a false equivalency. I explained Ozpin amd Rhodes but also...Well for one, while we don't see portals line up in those specific areas, the plan was to have Jaune explain what was going on with everyone. And Qrow, Marrow and Robyn were still taking in the other Ace ops,they knew the plan so they would likely just head over to the nearest portal after, and...Maria and Pietro weren't there. And in James case, it wasn't just him 'saving who he could', it's that he could have tried to do more but didn't because he didn't want to risk it, and as Volume 8 showed, they really did have lots of time to evacuate people and could have found a way to Launch Amity. And...Well in his case there's the little fact that, as his Convo with Oscar makes explicit, James plan involved leaving the rest of Mankind To the dust and at Salems mercy.
There are problems with RWBY, but I don't think it's shoddily written, partially because I don't really find it 'particularly' flawed and think the good far outweighs the bad. And you know what? To some degree, I agree. I do think there's a weird bias towards authority in the FNDM, but maybe alot of fans are too dismissive of criticism, I do think to some degree we should acknowledge the RWDE and such aren't all right wingers and there's now a Vocal part of it that are on the left or members of minority groups. I don't agree with a ton of the things they say, and think most of it dosent hold up, but instead of just dismissing, perhaps it's better to look at things in detail and give proper arguments agaisnt them. So I won't treat you like an idiot, I'm going to give a full rundown on why I don't feel like it holds up under analytical scrutiny.
For one, while it doesn't have those specific issues like in the real world, I don't agree with this Criticism because I feel it is the one that sort of ignores the worldbuilding and what's been shown or said about the Military and the world itself and not the show, It sort of feels like people just bring up the basic concepts that would seem reasonable and ignore how the show executes certain things. For one, the military was a leftover from a time when they were meant to fight against other humans, It was something an Authoritarian state held over after its defeat and reformation, James and the Military helped Jac as he turned the SDC into the horrific corporate empire it is, Covordin shows that Nationalism is indeed a bit thing and that there were high ranking officers who were fully comfortable with the possiblity of just waging war on the other Kingdoms again. And then there's the specialist program, I've seen people sort of distill it to its very basics to make it seem more reasonable, describing it as just stuff like Huntsmen having rules and such, when the show displays it being way more screwed up then that. It literally involves indoctrinating people as students, were shown Elm reprimand the protagonists saying how they don't need to think about Orders just follow them. As both Volumes show, the culture of the program is deeply screwed up and unhealthy for them, were shown how they taught stuff like repressing your emotions and how deeply unhealthy it is for them.
And...Furthermore? If we're judging by how things are In Universe with the show the world built...James way of doing things is, completely absurd. I already dislike Cynical 'This is the REAL world 'Types IRL. But....In the world James is in, his strategy is just....
He lives in a world where negativity causes monster attacks and the villains whole Shtick is manipulating narratives to cause disarray and ensuring people stay divided. James strategy involved closing off Atlas from the rest of Remnant after they were framed for causing the Fall of Beacon, never bothering to clear there name when sleet and Camilla say he could easily do so, he dismisses both his image across the Globe and in Atlas, and dismisses what the people of Mantle want and the stuff his actions currently cause, all as Neccesary sacrifices when that's all completely insane and Relies on basically ignoring absolutely everything about the situation they are in and how there enemy works, wich again, Ruby points out, that he was actively playing into Salems hands and making it easier for her.
I think it's a decent display of the Tunnel Vision James has, he's prepared for the negativity of the END result of his plan and made preparations for it, but he...Basically ignores the consequences his actions are having right now and how that will affect his ends.
Overall...I think the issue is that James is not meant to be the Bad guy through Volume 7, and I feel like its not that the show 'contradicts' it's pure black and white take on things, it's just that it wasn't there to begin with. Whenever a Major flaw Ironwood had from the start is brought up, it's claimed that it means he was supposed to be 'Always evil'(admitedly some fans as well), when it dosent, it just means his flaws and darker aspects were always there and he didn't jump off the slippery slope instantly like some claim.
Were meant to sympathize with James, understand him, ECT. We're meant to want to see him get better, to be escatic when he does almost get better.
Overall, I don't agree with the idea that James was a reasonable charachter who was bastardized, the show set him up as flawed pretty well already, he's sympathetic because he's designed to be sympathetic. He's not potrayed as a Villain through 7 because he wasn't meant to be til the end.
Also...Well, even if you still felt that him 'Just' abandoning Mantle was still just morally gray...That isn't dropped in V8, it's bascially dropped not 2 episodes later. Where not only does he shoot Oscar but Oscar pointed out not only was he abandoning Mantle, but abandoning the rest of Mankind. Wich James just responds calling it an 'excellant philosophical point'.
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jadelotusflower · 3 years
Text
Robin Hood Rewatch: 2x08 Get Carter!
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This is actually one of my favourite episodes of the season, partly because I really enjoy relationship angst, but mostly because we get multiple characters dealing with their trauma/grief. If we can't get these guys and gals into therapy, at least we get to see them talk (and hug) it out.
Also the best episode title they're had for a while - I have no doubt one of the writers is a fan, and Carter is so named only because they wanted to make this reference. The assassin seeking revenge for a dead brother is wholesale lifted from the plot of the film, and Joseph Kennedy almost has a passing resemblance to Michael Caine's look in that role.
"Get Carter - before Carter gets you!"
Carter is one of the only guest stars they actually will bring back later, and for good reason.
"Why don't you ever kiss my ring?" Vaisey, always making things creepy.
Marian is simmering with unrestrained anger, eager to get into the fight, while Robin is the one advocating for the watch and see approach, and it’s quite the role reversal.
The gang's reaction to her charging off is quite funny though, she knocks John over completely and Djaq throws her hands in the air.
Robin’s now getting a taste of what the rest of the gang have to put up with dealing with his recklessness.
Tying Marian up in the middle of a melee, however, is disgusting behaviour - while Marian was hot-headed throwing herself into the fight (nothing Robin hasn't done before himself), he knows that she can hold her own with a sword and doesn't need protecting. Tying her hands is the absolute worst thing he could have done, because how is she meant to defend herself? I can somewhat understand where Robin is coming from in this episode (even if he goes about it badly), but this is unjustifiable.
Clearly she gave that guard she clanked on the head amnesia, because he never reports back that Marian was fighting with the gang.
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“I owe you my life”/“I won’t take it just yet.” Nice.
Scimitar is still missing in action.
Robin doesn’t want Marian to be seen in case she needs to return to the castle, when he’s spent the whole season urging for her to join the gang. I think he realises he made a mistake asking her to flee last episode without giving her time to deal with her grief, and wants to leave her options open. But telling her that she’s not ready to make the decision (about whatever she wants to go back), however correct, is patronising.
There's a fundamental conflict that Marian wants to be treated like a member of the gang, but doesn't want to cede to Robin's authority like the rest of the gang - in turn Robin expects her to follow his orders like the others, but isn't treating her like he would the others either - he would never tie them up to keep them out of a fight, and Marian has every right to pissed at him about it.
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Djaq and Much having a little tête-à-tête about Carter - I just really enjoy that they’re often paired together in these gang scenes, they balance/play off each other so well. Just this pure platonic frazzled vs calm vibe.
Much just has this really great memory for faces - he was able to recognise fake Richard last season just from his profile despite wearing a helmet, and now he knows he remembers Carter's face from somewhere (or as it will turn out, Carter's brother).
Much really just does not let up, and I love that about him. "You'll be disappointed though, with uh, today's wound. I mean if you're planning to go back to the Holy Land and, uh, kill him." That not so subtle probing for information and Sam Troughton's delivery is always perfect.
"Wasn't me, was it?" Oh Much, so close.
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“The crusty one” - lol
It's not explicit, but implied that Vaisey and Guy believe Edward was the one passing information to Robin, and Marian is cleared of any suspicion (paving the way for her return). Guess Guy never showed the Sheriff that hair dagger after all.
Vaisey is actually giving Guy some really good advice here, albeit laced with his usual cruelty and getting all up in Guy's personal space.
"Grow up Gisborne" - now I don't think it's deliberate on Vaisey's part to invoke a Marian parlance, seeing as she really only says this to Robin (and once to Much), but it's a nice little callback, however unintentional.
Marian asks for an apology (and deserves one), but Robin doubles down and doesn't come out of this exchange well.
Because his delivery is terrible, but he's otherwise quite correct - as skilled as Marian is, she’s used to relying on (and having to worry about) only herself and not work in a team, and look to a single point of command. But both of them have their backs up - they're two strong personalities and neither is going to give ground, reverting to the ideological clashes of season 1, except now in much closer quarters.
Robin's also not used to being challenged in this particular way, and in his frustration is reacting like a captain disciplining a soldier, not a lover helping their partner through their grief. I do wonder if the conversation would have gone differently if they'd been alone.
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lol at the gang awkwardly standing around listening to Robin and Marian fight. Djaq trying to busy herself with her mortar and pestle as Robin and Marian argue around her.
A really great scene between Marian and John aka the camp dad. Marian really just needs someone to listen to her and appreciate what she's going through - Robin is too fixated on the dangerous way she's channeling her grief and not even trying to address the root cause. He trying to tell her what to do, not listen to what she actually needs.
On the other hand it's probably better coming from John, a neutral party without the emotional baggage she has with Robin.
Because Robin and Marian are really being driven by completely different motives - Marian by grief and therefore loss, and Robin by trauma and therefore fear. In her sorrow, Marian has lost all her fear of being discovered, in fact she wants to make it know she's with the gang, to finally be free to say which side she's on and fight openly, to make her father's death worthwhile, and can't understand why Robin is trying to stifle that.
"I thought you used to have your own men Little John?" So someone remembers Forrest and Hanton!
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After Carter takes down the gang one by one, Robin takes down Carter in three seconds (including catching the long dagger Carter throws at him, and flinging it back) and it's lights out. Can you believe it's the first concussion of the season? (Notwithstanding the multiple head injuries Allan sustained last episode).
While Marian has been known to be punch-happy, the "he'll tell us more if he knows we're willing to hurt him" is just so (intentionally) out of character - it is however somewhat reminiscent of Robin in 1x08, wanting to get his punch and torture on with Guy. However rather than understanding where Marian is coming from, he pushes her away with the "go and cook something" jibe. This almost feels like he was going for familiar banter and miscued, but is also an asshole thing to say. When their positions were reversed in 1x08 Marian at least tried to reason with him - Robin is seems to be ill-equipped to do the same.
Allan just having a little snooze against the castle wall. He really seems defeated and depressed after last episode.
Marian's corset has a pouch to hold a dagger - or at least I hope there is because otherwise it's ouch time.
Leaving Marian at the camp is again a mistake on Robin's part - it excludes and isolates her from the gang, rather than trying to involve her so she can bond with them, engaging in their outreach to the peasants - who she helped as the Nightwatchman, but never really had the opportunity to come to know. It would remind her that they are not just fighting against the Sheriff but for the people, which in her frenzied grief she has perhaps lost sight of.
Instead, Robin's focus is on Carter, who he rather identifies with and so finds it easier to address his motives, and try and change them.
Carter is in many ways Robin’s dark mirror, what he could have become in the Holy Land if he chose a different path. It’s important that this happens right when Robin is backsliding - he’s trying to save his own soul as much as Carter’s.
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Okay, let's talk about Marian’s forest gear - fashioned from the outfit she wore when she fled the castle the previous episode - but dear me it's awful. The grey culottes, rather than becoming trousers have now been turned into that corset, and her vest/skirt overlay have now become those trousers. Just baffling.
“I’m good with nuns” followed by Allan straight up knocking the Mother Superior over and stealing her ring is iconic.
Much gives Robin a sword to use going after Carter - still no scimitar.
I really love the confrontation/fight scene between Robin and Carter - it's very well choreographed and written, but we also see the best of Robin's character (after seeing some of the worst earlier).
Carter's brother is called Thomas - Allan's brother was called Tom. Lots of dead brothers in this show (including Djaq's).
The story of Carter's brother Thomas dying because he "stopped listening" and led a raid against orders is a little on the nose, but gives context to Robin’s fear for Marian’s safety in part triggered by his war trauma - someone charging in against orders and then dying in his arms.
But it shows Robin as a man who, even when Thomas' recklessness had cost not only his own life but others of Robin's men, was still moved to instruct the stretcher-bearers to make Thomas the hero, and himself the negligent captain, in order to comfort his family.
The fight is fairly even, and although Robin gets the upper hand in the end, it's only partly his skill - rather his true strength is in reaching the man inside the assassin, and then surrender and allow Carter to take his revenge if that's what he wants, and despite his fear, trust that there is good still in him, and that he can leave behind the life as a killer as Robin has done (tried to do).
This scene is the core of why I really love Robin as a character. He's riddled with PTSD and a reckless bravado, he's at time emotionally stunted with those he loves, makes terrible mistakes and often says the wrong thing, but he also has this great heart and compassion that allows him to reach people, to understand and help them, even at the risk of his own life. He's trying.
"He was a hero - just not on that day" is quite a poignant line.
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Much and Djaq together again, just saying.
Robin finally finds out that Roger of Stoke was intercepted. I had assumed he'd figured that out once he knew Allan was a traitor but okay.
Poor Much crying out for Robin's attention - he's got his own trauma from the war and wants to talk about it, to commiserate with Robin about what they went though, but Robin can only cope by not talking about it, not even thinking about it.
Much makes a good point that Robin should have listened to him about recognising Carter, but it comes across as jealously over Marian and Robin misses just how deeply Much carries his hurt.
One of Robin's biggest flaws is that he's overwhelming in his affection, compassion, and understanding for strangers, but takes those he loves for granted - Carter's response to grief was the same as Marian's, but Robin listened to Carter, consoled and comforted him, while keeping Marian at arm's length. Perhaps because strangers don't ask for anything beyond that - it is the granting of kindness, but not the sharing of self. It's the latter Robin truly fears, but what Much and Marian deserve (although tbf Marian has problems with this as well).
“Either I’m part of your gang or I’m not” is a valid point, and Robin's still not happy even when she agrees to stay behind!
But she disobeys him, and saves his life. It's a rite of passage - almost all of the members of the gang have this.
Allan looking rather distressed as Guy is about the chop off Robin's head, and he makes a small movement just before the swing (as does Much).
Guy again pushing Marian past the point of discomfort - she left, wrote him a letter asking him to leave her alone, straight up told him to his face to leave her alone, and still he persists.
Her kissing Guy (to distract him from seeing Much and Will) is really the only time she sends mixed signals, but Guy's whole energy seems to be just to wear her down until she agrees to be with him and it's gross. It is however kind of amusing that he tries to be authoritative and forbid her from leaving, and she immediately walks away.
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Robin and Marian are back in playful banter mode, although I wish there had been a deeper discussion (and that Robin had apologised in return). It doesn't quite feel like the conflict between them has been resolved, it really is just a "truce".
But I do like that it's Marian who reaches out to Robin at the end of this episode, because up until this point it's Robin who has been (somewhat) the one making overtures - asking her to join the gang, telling her he needs her, telling her he loves her, while Marian's been more reserved. This feels like her acknowledging that sometimes she needs to take the first step.
This was a long one - but as a I said, I really love this episode!
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aj-anime-blog · 3 years
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To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts - Review!
First review here we go!!
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So, after being completely and utterly obsessed with Jujutsu Kaisen and AOT season 4, I decided to check out MAPPA studios and watch a bunch of stuff from their roster. My so-called "MAPPA binge" included this strange and unknown piece: Katsute Kami Datta Kemono-tachi e, or in English, To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts. An adaption of a manga originally released in Bessatsu Shounen (you might recognize this as the magazine that released Attack on Titan!), it looked pretty promising. I do have to admit that I didn't read a page of this anime's manga, though the art style on it looks gorgeous!!
The concept behind the show: A war has torn two halves of a nation apart, split into the North and the South. The Northerners, who were previously greatly outnumbered in battle, created a half-human, half-beast species known as "Incarnates" because of their God-like abilities. But the Incarnates begin having some issues when their beast forms take over their bodies, turning them into monsters. When the war ends, our protagonist, Hugh Hank, an Incarnate and previous captain of the Incarnate squad, swears to kill all of his mutating Incarnate buddies before they can destroy the world.
This review will not contain spoilers until the labeled "Spoiler" section at the bottom.
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In general, what do I think?: 4/10, this show kinda sucked. Ouch! I hate being that blunt! Especially on my first review here! But To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts (let's call it TTASB from here on out!) had glaring flaws that, while it did hold up as a show, made it uninteresting and hard to love. Not only were the characters mediocre and boring, but the show seemed to contradict itself and its own opinion of the Incarnates all the time! Are they bloodthirsty monsters that need to be killed? Are they misunderstood humans who should be given peace? I don't know! Our main characters don't seem to either! Other than the "war bad" motif that gets shoved down your throat from episode one, the show felt stagnant in what it was trying to make the audience feel.
I hate being so cynical about it, though, because it does still earn those 4 points! Even though a lot of it falls flat, as a whole, it's still an ok show! Hank and Schaal have good concepts and their dilemmas are interesting in certain parts when the writers manage to nail pits and pieces of their development! The fight scenes were cool and I think that the concept for the world was neat! And the show does have a pretty cool title. Let's be honest, To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts sounds super metal.
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So what about those characters?: 5/10! Hugh Hank and Schaal are our two main protags for the show, and they both have pretty interesting concepts! Hank is an Incarnate, he used to be the leader of the other Incarnates, and he made a vow with them that when they lost their minds, he would kill them himself. Schaal is the daughter of one of these Incarnates that fought under Hank. Interesting, right?! How could these two opposing characters get along with one another?
TTASB tries to give the two of them a sort of grumpy-old-mentor-teaches-a-cheery-youngster relationship (which, admittedly, is one of my favorite tropes) and manages to forget everything good about having this kind of relationship. To start, it feels like Schaal has next to no reason to be tolerating Hank, and vice versa. She follows him around because *insert some excuse about understanding the Incarnates?* and Hank lets her because *insert I really don't know*. It really feels like Schaal doesn't need to be there, and she's just a plot device to move along Hank's character development.
Then, the two of them never really interact in ways that really moved me. It never felt like they made a deeper connection that meant something to the plot. They interacted, sure. They spoke about their issues, yeah. But it never felt like Hank needed Schaal, or that Schaal was emotionally tied to Hank, until the show spoonfed it to you that they were.
In the end, neither of their developments felt compelling or interesting. There were a few scenes that maybe, if you squinted, hinted towards them growing as people, but for a 12 episode anime, it was very menial. It also felt like said scenes were fairly forced, with their development not really leading them to the point that they ended up at. Again, TTASB has a bit of an issue with contradicting itself.
The villain was so meh. He has a motive, yeah. It's pretty lame. He's not compelling at all. Nothing about him is interesting or kept me hooked on him. The show probably could've existed without him, to be entirely honest. I don't really have much else to say about him! I just did not really care about him at all.
The best characters in the show are hands-down the supporting cast of Incarnates. Each one has fairly interesting motivations, and even though they're only given an episode or so to tell their stories, they feel the most genuine. My biggest qualm with them is that the show doesn't build their connection to Hugh Hank at all, so when he gets emotional over them, you're kind of like "uhhh u know this guy??". More about this down in our spoilers section, as I'll go over a scene where this is prominent.
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So characters were meh, but what about the story itself?: 4/10, just as meh. Again, very interesting! Lots of potential! But it fell flat where it mattered. To be clear, just before we dig deeper: the 12 episodes of TTASB isn't the entire story. It's clearly intended to be continued, though, as of writing this, I haven't been able to dig up any news about a potential season 2.
I don't really mind if animes aren't completely original, as long as they're fun, but TTASB didn't really do that. A lot of the episodes felt boring and reused like it was a watered-down copy-paste of other material. Some episodes were repetitive and seemed to be trying to hammer in the same themes, only to be later contradicted by other episodes. TTASB will spend a few episodes showing you how misunderstood and sweet the Incarnates are and then have an episode where an Incarnate murders a bunch of people. I would love it if it was, in any way, shape, or form, sarcastic, but it is not. TTASB just thinks it can get away with the blatant disregarding of its own morals. It only ends up feeling disconnecting and frustrating.
It follows an almost monster-of-the-week style format for introducing the Incarnates, which does them a bit of a disservice, in my opinion. I really would have liked it if there was a bit more overlap between the Incarnates and their stories! We know that they're all very close (or, at least, the show tells us that they are without really showing us) so seeing them interact with one another outside of their respective episode would've been fun!
The story tries to be darker and grimier than it actually is. I didn't end up caring much for the nation itself and much of the politics that the show tried to utilize felt boring and, again, watered-down. It felt like the show wanted to make it a political drama about war and human rights and only ended up shying away from what makes those genres impactful. Again, this isn't to say that TTASB's story is bad, it's just not as good as it could've been.
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But it's MAPPA, so the art has to be good, right?: Yeah! Art was cool! Nothing golden, like MAPPA's newer stuff, but a solid 7/10! The fight scenes were nice, and even though a lot of them felt redundant to watch, they were still smooth! I have some qualms about a few of the Incarnates' beast forms (especially Hank's) looking like they belong back in 2001, but they still looked cool nonetheless.
I don't really have much to say on this front! Nothing really blew me away, but I never looked at the screen and winced away.
Ok and finally, pacing!: 4/10. 12 episode animes always have tricky pacing to them. I like to think about the show being pretty much only 5 hours long, which isn't that much time to cram in as much story and plot as they might want to. Overall, TTASB actually had pretty decent pacing, with a long enough build-up that led to a final showdown. If you ask me, I do think there was a pacing problem in the second half, as it felt far too stretched out, but that could've just been my perception of it.
My biggest issue with pacing loops back to the characters again. They're never really given time to explore or build up relationships. Especially not Hank and his prior team of Incarnates. I think that there should've been more screen time dedicated to their time in the army, to better explain the emotional distress that he's going through as he's forced to hunt them down. Instead, TTASB relies on a throwaway line or scene to deliver this emotional blow, and it nearly always falls flat.
Music!!!!: 6/10, The soundtrack in this anime really wasn't memorable and I don't remember much from it. Whoops!
I did like the opening a bit! It was done by Mafumafu, who I think has done a Pokemon intro song? Either way, it was energetic and fit the theme of the show well! The ending is also a bop, now that I'm thinking about it! It manages to be nostalgic and sad without being too slow! So good music on both fronts!!
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OK, now we're in spoiler territory! Be warned!
I don't have too much to say regarding spoilers. Nothing in the show really feels important enough that I have to mention it under a spoiler tag. A few small notes, I suppose.
The show treats Hank like the more important character but then throws him away in his "death" to focus on Schaal, which was a very frustrating episode. Schaal felt so bland and useless in it, even when she faced her father again. Bringing him back to life felt like a sad excuse to force her into character development. I did like it when she found the courage to shoot him, but I also thought that it wasn't really as emotional as the show wanted it to be.
Hank's connection with Schaal, particularly in the second half, feels completely unnatural and forced. When she gets kidnapped, he has some sort of mental breakdown over her and it, if anything, felt creepy. It was undeserved and was forced down your throat rather than built.
Beatrice was the best character in the show and I think that if they stuck to ideas like hers (misunderstood creatures who just want to go back to their old lives), the story would have been much better. Instead, you switch to characters like the Gargoyle Incarnate, who just goes on a murder spree, and it ruins a lot of the development that Beatrice brought to the table.
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& our deep deep look at one part: Forgive me if I get this screwed up a bit, it's been a weekish since I finished the show and my brain dumped out all details of it already.
Hugh Hank goes to the mountains and fights the Garmr Incarnate, Rex (Roy? I'm a bit confused on his name), in an epic show-down. Obviously, at the end of it, Hank wins, killing Rex. Now, if you're like me, you sat there for most of the fight going "who tf is Rex and why is this battle important?" and only at the very END, when he's dying, do you see a clip that you might remember from the very beginning of the anime, with Rex talking about Schaal. You go "oohhh I know who he is!" but you wished that you remembered this ten minutes ago when the fight started because it would've been so much more impactful. The show didn't remind you of this scene. It didn't tell you that Rex was this same person that you already met. It expected you to remember, and I didn't. This scene sums up a lot of the character problems with the show, where even if something does have emotional weight, the show doesn't act on it.
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Now we're done!: Sorry if this was harsh, but that's my full review on To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts! I'd love to hear if you agree with me or think that I'm totally wrong! If you've read the manga, tell me if it's better or worth a read! And thanks for reading!
(The crossed-out "Hugh"s are all of the times that I got Hank's name wrong! I'm not super great with character names, but I always take it as a bad sign when I screw up the name. )
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staytiny-angel · 4 years
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War of Hearts
Chapter One
Rating: Mature
Main Pairing: Seth Rollins/Becky Lynch
Co-written with @riottbliss
Summary: Seth Rollins was once known as the Bad Boy Prince of MMA, now years after a career ending knee injury he's stepping into.the Octagon again not as a competitor but as his little sister's coach. Unfortunately for him the redhead across the cage from he and Paige is not only woman he'd just had a one night stand with but the younger sister and protege of the Finn Balor...the man that ended Seth's career.
Warnings: MMA style violence, Alcoholism, Implied Self-Harm (DM for details), Depression, Angst with a Happy Ending
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Hunter Hearst Helmsley, or professionally known by Triple-H sighed with embarrassment, reading tweet after tweet from his youngest son Seth Rollins.
"What happened to him?" His best friend and practically brother Shawn Michaels asked, looking over his shoulder.
"Cody took him out of the press conference, Seth's hungover, blaming everyone but himself"
Shawn shook his head, "Kid is letting the hype go to his brain. He's all over TMZ, The Bad Boy Prince of MMA is what they call him"
"Seth is the best fighter in the world in his division. He's earned the cockiness but his lifestyle…." Hunter shook his head
Shawn made a disgusted sound. "Kid reminds me of me before I got my act together"
"Fatherhood is what made you get your act together. That won't work for Seth" Hunter clicked on a video of his drunken son yelling into a camera about Finn Balor that had gone viral last week.
"He talks so much shit about Balor being a low rent MacGregor, hell Seth acts more like Conor then Finn does."
Hunter sighed "He's turned this into a complete mess, I wouldn't be surprised if his team drops him."
"Hey, Dusty loved that kid, Dustin and Cody wouldn't release him until he stopped making them money"
Hunter nodded but looked nonetheless unthrilled.
"He keeps making excuses about everything. I'm this close to calling Steph"
Shawn nodded with agreement as the two entered Seth's penthouse, greeting a tired looking Cody Rhodes. "I can't do this anymore Hunter" he said in place of a normal greeting.
"You are not dropping him" Hunter said matter of factly.
"AEF is supposed to be for fighters that respect the sport, he fucks around and doesn't even show up to the gym" Cody said.
Hunter ignored him and went upstairs to where he could hear his youngest groaning in misery.
Hunter sighed as Seth looked up from the toilet he was practically hugging. "I'm twenty five, perfectly legal" he muttered, Hunter's gaze looking at the black and gold championship that laid discarded.
"While ago you would have treated that with respect" He said, Seth rolling his eyes. "Would you rather me puke on it? It's just a fucking belt' "
"Don't let anyone hear you say that" Hunter said lowly. "You're going to the weigh in today even if I have to drag you by your hair there myself"
"No the fuck I'm not, don't you see me dyin' here?" Seth whined "I'm going to fucking sleep"
"What the fuck happened to you?!" Hunter yells "Every since your Uncle Shane became your manager this is what you've turned into."
Seth looked unfazed. "Don't get angry because I'm better than you ever were" and shoved his father out of his way, flipping off Cody, and ignoring Shawn.
"What am I going to do with him?" Hunter sighed, exhausted.
"Knock his ass out?" Shawn suggested. "I'll take care of him" Cody rolled his eyes. "Britt and I will make sure he gets to the weigh in. I just need painkillers and food"
"I'm gonna go talk to Shane, I want to know what kind of garbage he's been filling my kid's head with" Hunter mutters
"I told you listening to Vince was a mistake." Shawn replies shaking his head "All of you let Vince snow you into thinking it was embarrassing that his mother managed him"
Hunter sighed. "I don't know what to do. I don't want to drag Steph back, Shane has a tight grip on him"
"Worry about that fuckface later" Shawn said. "Seth needs you, not him" Hunter nodded firmly, making his way downstairs to see Seth passed out on his couch, his dog Kevin and cat Daryl laying on him.
"This was our compromise" Cody explained. "I let him take a nap, he goes to the weigh in later"
"He isn't going to beat Balor in this condition. He doesn't spar anymore and his knee has been inflamed for weeks" Britt says quietly
"He shouldn't even be fighting. We told Shane but he says there's too much money at stake for Seth to pull out"
"Money money money"' Shawn mocked. "All he cares about is fucking printed paper"
Hunter ignored them and instead chose to brush back some of Seth's hair, his son unconsiously responding to it. "What did I do wrong raising him?" he asked. Hunter rolls his eyes at the look his older brother gave him "The truth" he says quietly
"No offense bro, but this family is a whole fucking lot to live up to and you weren't exactly shy about your expectations once Seth showed an aptitude for the sport. None of us were. I have to even ask myself, when was the last time any of us actually had a conversation with the kid that wasn't about fighting?"
"He's cracking underneath the pressure" Cody chimes in
"Yeah, he is and now Shane is filling his head with all these ideas about the image he should project" Shawn continues "Quiet guys who, play with their dogs and write poetry when their not in the Octagon don't sell tickets, but Bad Boys sure the fuck do."
*Later*
Seth scowled at his phone as Britt ushered him into the arena the weigh was taking place in. "I'm assuming you told the press he was gonna bail?" Cody growled at Shane who held his hands up. "They were gonna find out sooner or later" "Yeah yeah, no press is bad press" Seth said.
"Except the press says you're an asshole" Cody deadpanned. "Don't do anything stupid up there, or Mark is going to have a stroke" Seth didn't respond, instead heading up the stairs to the stage, where Balor had clearly made weight, despite being skinny. Seth took off his shirt per usual, standing on the scale.
"197 pounds" The announcer said, Seth smirking at Balor. The Irish man looked unfazed and rolled his eyes. Seth, in a act of annoyance, promptly flipped him off, hearing everyone in the crowd either laugh or groan
-Backstage -
"Gonna be fun beating your ass Balor, I promise not to hurt you too badly," Seth says cockily, slouching in a chair and putting his sunglasses back on.
"Oh, Rolly its almost time to give up your precious" Finn responds, "Clock is ticking boyo and your time is almost up"
"Mon roi, nous devons-oh shit" a pake woman walked up, speaking rapid French and stopping in her place when she saw Seth.
"Hey Seth" she said coldly.
"Vi" Seth responded, his attitude gone.
"He your king now?" "Surprised you even remember any French, from what I read, you've drank yourself through everything"
"It's what happens when you give your heart to someone and get it ripped in half, I wasn't enough for you, that's what you said right? I wasn't straight enough for you?! So you threw my ring in my face and left" Seth yelled "Cause Bisexual people, we're all cheaters didn't you know?"
At least according to Violet Gillath, wait I'm sorry Violet Balor now isn't it?."
"Stop it" Finn growled. "Before I knock your ass out now"
"Try it bitch" Seth snarled back.
Violet got between them and shoved Seth back. "Chaton, stop" she hissed.
Seth stumbled upon hearing his old nickname. "Why?" he choked out. "What did I do?"
Seth shook his head as if to shake his thoughts into place "Why Violet? Why did you leave me? You...you fucking broke me" he said in a small voice "I have the right to know why, just tell me. Why would you do that after everything. I was going to quit fighting for you because you didn't like seeing what it was turning me into. You get up on stage and you still sing my songs, but you said you hated me. I just wanna know."
Violet crossed her arms and closed her eyes. "I didn't want to be with you. You never signed anything so legally those songs are mine. I said what I meant, you weren't enough"
Seth looked like she had rebroken his heart.
Thankfully Britt walked in. "Hey, we gotta go"
Seth grabbed his title and held it to Finn. "This is mine. You can keep that bitch but you will never get this"
-Backstage-
"I've never known you to be biphobic, wanna explain to me why Rollins is convinced you are?" Finn said sitting down in his locker room with his wife a few minutes later.
"His uncle...manager, that bastard Shane got me my record deal in exchange for breaking Seth's heart" Violet told her husband "Seth hates fighting, he was going to quit and go on the road with me. He can't sing a note but he writes and plays guitar. We were going to be a duo. Shane was watching his cash cow walk out the door. So he threatened me and made an offer. Seth was the sweetest thing and he loved me and I broke his heart and let Shane turn him into that"
"If I could go back in time and slap him across the face I would but I can't" Violet said brokenly. "Shane has made it perfectly clear that if I ever tell him that he would ruin both our careers"
Finn hugged her to him. "I'm still gonna kick his ass" Violet slapped his arm. "Please try not to" Finn shrugged. "I'm undefeated"
"You know Seth is too. And the thing with being undefeated is that there's only one way down, being kicked off the mountain"
-Next Day-
Seth was throwing up again having had drank himself to sleep following his encounter with his ex.
Cody looked extremely tired and Britt concerned. "You have to fight in an hour!" Cody yelled out
"I don't fucking care." Seth yelled back "I don't even want to fucking fight." He muttered to himself, as he rubbed at his knee. "Come on fucking give already." He whispered to the inflamed appendage.
He knew what he was doing was dangerous but it was his only way out. If his knee would just give up the fucking ghost, he could quit this bullshit once and for all.
"Your sisters are out there tonight" Britt said, walking in, holding a brace.
"I really don't care" Seth growled, letting Britt put his knee in it.
"And your mom' Britt added. Seth took a breath when Britt touched his knee.
"Holy shit, it feels like its burning"
We're letting you go after tonight" Cody said angrily. "I don't care if you win or not, you've ruined All Elite Fighting's reputation"
"I don't care, I never wanted to be in your shitty gym anyway" Seth shrugged. "I'm going to get changed"
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Savannah & Jac
Savannah: Are you on your way here? Jac: I hadn't started to get ready yet Jac: got caught up doing some prep for our next lecture, haven't looked at the clock in a minute 🤯 whoops Savannah: well thank god, I was hoping to catch you before having to dramatically tell you to turn around, especially if you had happened to be half way to me Jac: Oh? Jac: What's going on in UH tonight? 😄 Savannah: Nothing, which is perhaps why we're the centre of attention Jac: 😬 Don't love the sound of that Jac: what's been said? Savannah: I'm not even sure because the way she was saying it gave me the most INTENSE Catholic school flashbacks Savannah: & I've overanalysed every syllable to the point that it's been twisted beyond recognition so I can't be trusted to reliably relay any of it Jac: Okay, pause Jac: who's being mean to you, and why on earth Jac: Is it that one girl in the next room along from you, because I did think she was someone's little sister so I can believe the immaturity Savannah: I think she was trying to be complimentary about us but I didn't take it like that, I can't, not after everything Jac: Baby Jac: just try to explain it best you can Jac: take your time, and I'll forgive any personal interjection Jac: because I care more about how it's made you feel, than how it was said or meant, really Savannah: she's made me feel like I'm doing this all wrong, exactly how I said I wouldn't, holding you back and being too much Jac: But you aren't at all Jac: what would she even know about it, she doesn't know either of us, even a little bit Savannah: maybe that unbiased outside perspective is what I needed to make me realise the mistakes I'm making Savannah: because it isn't just her, they're all talking about how you're ALWAYS here, how inseparable we are Jac: Do you feel like we're taking things too fast, being too much? Savannah: No Savannah: but I didn't last time either Jac: okay Jac: because you know you can tell me, if you are Jac: I mean, I don't know what to do with this information Jac: we don't judge them for their relationships Savannah: I was fine, but I'm scared now, obviously Jac: that we're like you and Tyler, or you and Milo Jac: or that we're repeating our past and it'll end badly again Savannah: that I can't have a relationship that isn't ridiculously co-dependent, except it's not even, because that implies that they were as extra as I was Savannah: & that I shouldn't have entered into this one if I haven't changed enough to avoid repeating things Jac: They balanced you out Jac: and I don't Savannah: they let me do whatever I wanted, that isn't what I want from you Jac: but if it's what we both want Jac: it's hard for me to think we should listen more to these girls, who are probably speaking at least from a bit of jealousy, than that Savannah: No, because it isn't what we both want, a healthy relationship is what we both want Jac: Yeah Jac: you're right, of course Jac: but, I don't like the implication that they know what works for us Jac: if we need to reevaluate, it can still be on our terms Jac: I bet lots of them have never had a serious relationship, or only the same level of unhealthy as we have before, they're not qualified Savannah: They don't know us or have any qualifications & I believe you're right about the jealousy factor but I am still willing to see & use this as the wake up call that I need to do better Jac: We can do that Jac: I trust you Jac: I'm not going to see this as you pulling away or something I've done Savannah: please don't, because it isn't Jac: It was my initial fear Jac: but you never leave me to worry Jac: and the fact that I immediately went there is just something I need to address too Savannah: you have reason to go there, it's okay Savannah: how I handled things back then is precisely what I'm trying to avoid Jac: I completely see that, I honestly do Jac: I'm sorry if I got defensive right there Savannah: & I can see that I've slightly overreacted now that I've slightly calmed down Jac: It made me feel the same Jac: like you said, the school flashbacks are no joke Savannah: I'm so sorry I told you not to come, I'd hate for you to think that's what I want, ever Jac: It's okay, we can take a night off Jac: but I'm also not gonna tell you you can't come to mine instead, once they've all gone back to their rooms or whatever Savannah: are you going to tell me what prep you were doing which I should've been instead of freaking out? Savannah: because I need to know Jac: Of course Jac: we haven't competed like that for a LONG time now Jac: it's not like we were asked but I asked [your fave prof bff 'cos lord knows I'm using the photos] on the way out last week if there was anything we could study up on ready for next term Savannah: once I've done everything he has suggested & fixed my 😢 face I'll come over Jac: My poor boo, I hate that they upset you so much Jac: also that we only have showers Jac: or I'd recommend a bubble bath as first order of business Savannah: honestly the lack of 🛀🏾🥂 upsets me more than anything Savannah: but in all seriousness, it wasn't even those girls at fault, I got myself worked up Jac: it is a travesty Jac: we need a place with an en-suite next year Jac: because the idea of sharing a bath with god knows who is no more appealing than NOT having one 😰 Jac: it's okay, I won't insist on being that stereotype and 'having a word' with them, they can live, for now Savannah: if checking into a hotel wouldn't be viewed as the ULTIMATE overreaction, I definitely would use the 💳 my dad insisted upon giving me Jac: I can only imagine the flashbacks that would give him 🙄 Jac: not worth the stress nor satisfaction Jac: though I was thinking we could do something, go somewhere, before the Christmas hols, as we will both be obligated to go all in with the family during Savannah: there would be SO MUCH satisfaction but I promise, I'll resist and be good, for now Savannah: no such promises of 👼🏾 for a family Christmas though, so I love that idea Jac: We can make that happen with just a shower, I promise you Jac: even if we just see a bit more of Edinburgh, get that hotel, I wanna treat you Jac: and no one can stop me spending as much time as we're able lavishing attention on you before we have to go back Jac: because it's going to be stressful, we both know that much already Savannah: if you're feeling left out because your entire dorm isn't talking about us, I can make that happen once we're 🚿 Savannah: you're the most thoughtful girlfriend in the entire world, but if that's something we're about to start competing over in place of academics, that's more than fine with me Jac: I might regret saying I can handle that but Jac: I don't Jac: 😳😳 Savannah: you won't have any, I promise Jac: I love you Savannah: I'm utterly in love with you Jac: I'll never get over hearing that Savannah: you don't have to because I love your 😳 too Jac: It's so different Jac: even though we used to say it like all the time Savannah: you know I meant it every time, it just had to be different Jac: and it is Jac: third time's a charm Jac: we'll make it work this time, no matter how much work that might be Jac: because it's so worth it Savannah: yes, it is and we will Jac: I'm gonna order all your faves when you get here Savannah: 🥰 Savannah: hopefully the lecture prep won't take me too long Jac: you can always read through mine Jac: it's not like it's cheating, just a better way to do a study sesh Savannah: if you're going to send it to me, absolutely, but if you're expecting me to concentrate on reading through it when I get there, I'm sorry but there's no way Jac: I'm not that 😈 Jac: at least not at the sake of your education Savannah: & thank goodness as my parents are both already doing the most to interfere with my education right now with their constant communication Jac: yet imagine your dad in particular if you did any less than perfect Jac: I don't know how he fails to see how counterproductive the constant checking in is Savannah: or the pressure that he's been putting on me to spend Christmas with him from literally November 1st, I swear Savannah: it hasn't slipped his mind that I had no choice but to do that for the last two, even if the unfairness to my mother is something he refuses to think about Jac: Yes, I was about to say Jac: he'll have to think about how he's going to timeshare more efficiently with your mum now, just because it was his way or nothing for two whole years Jac: clearly, that didn't work so well for anyone BUT him Savannah: he thinks he can dictate to me as if I'm no older than I was when he forced me to leave & as though nothing has changed since then Savannah: I'm not going to jeopardise my mum's recovery by not spending time with her in the holidays Jac: To even suggest, let alone expect that from you Jac: even if he's not thinking about your mother, why would he want that guilt for you Jac: at least he cannot literally force you onto a plane to Sligo instead of Dublin Jac: it's getting Sienna, that needs to be planned Savannah: I'm at my wits end with her, it's like she doesn't see the problem Savannah: of course I'd understand her reluctance to spend it with mum but it's all about him, every single of her reasonings, because they aren't even really hers Savannah: she just fully believes whatever dad says Jac: 😕 That's hard Jac: because it automatically puts you in the bad guy camp Jac: because obviously it's nicer to believe that he only wants what's best etc Jac: but when she realizes that's not totally true, that'll be shattering Savannah: she's going to get hurt by him again, as if I wasn't there when he walked out teaching her to question everything that comes out of a man's mouth, that man in particular Savannah: I hate it Jac: I know 😞 Jac: all you're trying to do is protect her Jac: is she interested at coming like, at all? Jac: even if not the actual day of Savannah: It's not like I want her to spend her time and energy until her leavers cert hating him as much as I do, I know it'll be different for her now that I'm gone Savannah: but we get nowhere whenever I try to talk to her about mum, irrespective of the actual subject Savannah: I'm not giving up, of course, but I won't pretend to you that it isn't exhausting Jac: Of course you don't, you'd never tell her what to think Jac: but if you can see things differently, or remember how it was last time, it doesn't make you a bad sister, it's the opposite Jac: you never do ❤ Jac: I was just wondering, though this would be a bit morally dubious Jac: if we could trick her into spending some time with your mum Jac: I could make my sister invite her to something legit, like a family party Jac: your dad MIGHT say yes? I don't know Savannah: at this point I'm so close to walking away from everyone for the sake of my own mental health to spend the holidays alone & obviously that's not a real option I have available to me so I'm more than ready to do it & take the bad karma if it backfires Jac: I understand, last Christmas, I would've given anything to do just that Jac: I think it could work, your dad being the only potential block Jac: we could go for the second half, do New Years with her, maybe Savannah: 😞 I'm going to make sure you have the best Christmas this year, baby, whether or not this works Jac: I've got you, that's all I need for it to be perfect Jac: and we will work this out Jac: but as you said, it isn't even time yet, so you don't have to figure it all out tonight Jac: but when we do, you will have a peaceful and joyful Christmas, if it's the last thing I do Savannah: You're perfect & you're getting my undivided attention tonight, I truly do not care what opinion any or every American girl in this town has or decides to share Jac: A no-phone policy does not even need to be implemented when you're so beautiful Jac: it'd practically be a sin to not use every sense on you Jac: but seriously, whilst they may have a point, we're also further along than they might assume Jac: like I said, if they've never had a proper relationship, they're used to not getting texts back and having to be cool about it 🤷 Jac: we don't have to tone ourselves down or lessen what we have, if it doesn't serve us to do so, only in the ways it might Savannah: I will implement one though, some kind of a genuine family emergency happening again notwithstanding Savannah: I learnt a LOT about sin in Catholic school & you're totally right Savannah: you're the only person who I'd tone anything down for & since you haven't asked me, I really don't think it's necessary Jac: I appreciate it, a lot, you know that, right? Jac: the cliche isn't totally baseless then Jac: you can tell me all about it but we better keep that on the down-low 🤫 Savannah: okay, you don't want that specific dialogue broadcast to your entire dorm, just our mutual appreciation Savannah: I can do that Jac: I can only imagine how enthusiastic the boys would be Jac: and I only care about your enthusiasm Savannah: ugh, true Savannah: I forget too easily that we're not totally on our own once the door is closed, which I'm sure is what lead to that conversation taking place earlier Jac: We aren't the only ones who do that Jac: I swear to God I've heard at least four different girls going next door 🙄 Savannah: 🙄 not to mention I'm still getting woken up by a certain person we don't like just being loud while she undergoes her morning routine, which has literally been happening since I first moved in Jac: I can't deal with how loud she is Jac: the accent makes it so grating Jac: is she trying to be an influencer? make friends? either or 😬 honey no Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: I'm going to have to start going to bed earlier to compensate once lectures start Jac: She a THOUSAND percent has booked herself all afternoon/evening lectures and won't get why everyone is making such a big deal ??? Jac: so that girl Jac: I do my best work in the AM, that's just facts, not all of us plan to party through the entire experience, come on Savannah: So do I, as you know, so if she doesn't take the numerous hints once they are coming from more than just me, I'll have to move in with you & be that girl Savannah: which would entirely negate all the rational points I made earlier Jac: God, there needs to be a way to complain about her without it being dead obvious Jac: an amnesty box of sorts Jac: I'm still looking for doubles but no one is moving yet Savannah: If I have to befriend her to initiate the behaviour change that way, I guess I'll get used to the accent Savannah: you've said my 🥺 is like a superpower Jac: it would be very on-brand Jac: basically work experience for us Jac: and they are but she might fall for you and then she'd be around even more Savannah: oh no, imagine how vocal she would be if she did Savannah: it would be beyond difficult to cope with Jac: I would not cope Jac: at all Jac: so I shan't imagine it Savannah: 😄 Jac: 😥 Savannah: Baby, don't 😥 Jac: I'll have to go back to being a TOTAL bitch from hell if she dares Savannah: 🥺 no Savannah: you're an angel Savannah: & she isn't worth your time or energy, I am Jac: You Jac: x2 Jac: I don't care about anyone else here Jac: in the nicest way possible, of course Savannah: except [whatever your professor bff's name is] that's evident in the notes you've sent me Jac: Okay, he's pretty cool Jac: and definitely gonna help us get perfect marks Savannah: you definitely don't need his help Savannah: I'd almost forgotten just how intelligent you are Jac: I'll try not to be offended Jac: even though I was still totally convinced you'd be going to Bath before I saw you Savannah: I mean, actually, not in a romanticised way because of how much I was in awe of you Savannah: & I did go there, before I made up my mind which offer to accept & it didn't feel right Jac: I'm only teasing, I know that Jac: 🌌💫 Savannah: we were supposed to be here together, like we always talked about Savannah: I shouldn't have ever tried to fight that Jac: I couldn't even bring myself to check your socials before Jac: I don't know what I didn't want to see more, you know Jac: confirmation either way was just, no Savannah: I understand Jac: If I'd have seen gap year plans with Milo, that would not have been it Savannah: most of the time that we were intending to plan was spent arguing anyway, I'm not sure he really wanted to go at any stage of it Savannah: with me, I mean Jac: You weren't right for each other Jac: he's lost a lot more from that deal than you have Savannah: He'll be having a lovely time in hostels, undoubtedly Savannah: it won't be a culture shock at all Jac: Checks out Jac: authentic experience Jac: inserting himself with all the other foreigners Savannah: 🙄 Savannah: if I thought he had a posh accent, lord knows what they'll think Jac: he'll be stimulating the economy, they'll pretend he's not unbearable Savannah: at least he'll be stimulating something, I suppose Jac: 😂 Jac: you said it, not me Savannah: it speaks to my experience Jac: how anyone has the nerve to 🥱 you when you're so interesting is so offensive to me Savannah: it's not his fault that nobody else could ever be as interesting to me as you are, but he is responsible for the effort, or lack of that he put in Jac: no, it'd take someone really special to fight the 🌌💫 and it's plans for us Jac: and I can imply he wasn't that person, without being petty about it Savannah: it's honesty, he wasn't that person & he'd be the first to say so Jac: you're already happier, aren't you? Jac: on this path, this direction Savannah: yes, the happiest Jac: 😊🥰 Savannah: excuse me while I have one of those moments where I can't believe any of this is really happening & fully expect to wake up in Sligo for the summer to the realisation it was the most incredible dream Jac: It's actually such a fear Jac: I never want to go to sleep when I'm with you Jac: for that reason, and the obvious being I can't look at you with my eyes closed Savannah: but if you don't your subconscious can't talk to me & you know how much I love that Jac: so far Jac: what if I say something totally stupid and betray myself 😱 Savannah: you could never say anything stupid & I know you aren't going to betray yourself or me Jac: You trust me, I trust you Savannah: exactly Jac: if I ever say anything really cringe, you can just not tell me, yeah 😅 Savannah: 😄 like what? Jac: anything our favourite American might say, for example Savannah: she isn't actually going to attempt to flirt with me, boo Jac: I know, she's the definition of straight Jac: bless her Savannah: ^^ she's the only person I would apply the word definition to, literally anyone else has the ability to change & grow but she's CLEARLY set in her loud ways Jac: ^ That's totally the vibe Jac: she made her mind up aged 10 she was right and hasn't moved an inch since, whatever the subject Savannah: you're so right Savannah: What were you like when you were 10? Jac: Oh God Jac: let me think Jac: so, fourth class, absolutely LIVID over the fact we had 2 more years of first school after that Jac: thought I was way too grown-up for EVERYTHING Jac: there was probably some boyband I was into but if there was, I don't remember but Isabelle probably still has the merch and posters on her wall Jac: hopefully I was less insufferable when we properly met those years later Jac: how about you? Savannah: I can totally relate, except of course I thought I was too grown up for boybands too Jac: Totally Jac: it was like a secret shame but she had none, Amelia neither Jac: so I kinda had to go with it Savannah: 😄 Savannah: I had a very overprotective father who wouldn't have let me go to those concerts even if I had wanted to so Jac: it made sense to be anti then Jac: it was a lot of screaming and pre-teen hormones, it might've felt like it at the time, but you didn't miss out on a whole lot Savannah: if there'd been a girl band of that era I'd have been much more likely to have supported them, as a fierce little feminist Jac: Adorable Jac: you were cute, I remember that much Savannah: you've always been cute, I've seen the photos Jac: at least my hair had grown back in a decent amount by then Jac: I was so jealous of yours Savannah: really? I didn't even know how to properly style it back then Savannah: but I still insisted, obviously, instead of letting my mum help me Jac: I liked that Jac: you didn't just let your mum braid it and put a bow in Jac: I have to assume that was my logic when I cut mine Jac: independence, making my own choice Savannah: I thought I could do ANYTHING, it's embarrassing how big my aspirations were Savannah: & that there was no limit on the choices I had, there was total belief in that too Jac: it's nice Jac: I wish we stayed like that Savannah: imagine my 🥺 when I discovered inequality & where I was supposed to fit into it as a black girl, except don't because I was utterly devastated Savannah: we still have big dreams though & more choices than 10 year old me did Jac: I don't wanna cry Jac: you're still going to get everything you want Jac: and you've had to work twice as hard for it, no one can take that away from you Savannah: no 😢 we're both going to have a beautiful life Jac: ✨🌼🌷❤☀️❤🌹🌻✨ Savannah: I'll help you & you'll help me Savannah: now that I'm more willing to accept it than I was as a child Jac: and your hair is undeniably flawless Jac: we can do anything Savannah: Oh my god, it's my turn to be jealous of yours & I always am Jac: the fact you can be jealous of anyone blows my mind Jac: you are perfection Jac: but you can play with my hair all you want now Savannah: but not literally right now 🥺 Jac: life is so unfair Jac: I'm so proud of you though, working so hard Savannah: well I'm even prouder of you, these notes are flawless Jac: I've got my uses, yeah Savannah: [a picture of her own aesthetic af notes so far because we are both those bitches] Jac: [truly, could rinse the studyblr tag with these two] Jac: 😍😍😍 you've picked such pretty colours Savannah: [I have saved some cute psychology ones off pinterest for when they start their studies] Savannah: they do match my outfit but if I start sending pictures of myself I'll never finish Jac: if you start sending pictures of yourself, I'll find it harder to be supportive of your studies Savannah: I miss you too Jac: as long as we're in that together too Jac: I'll survive Jac: my room does need tidying before you get here Savannah: you're adorable, you don't have to tidy up for me Jac: for my notes to look perfect, my room has to get a little messy Jac: oh, and my hair, probably Savannah: I can fix your hair for you after we 🚿 Jac: as long as you don't think I look terrible when you show and run straight back Savannah: I've been 😢 so I don't have any room to judge but even if I did, you could never look terrible & there is no conceivable reason that I'd ever run away from you Savannah: but if you need to shown all of that when I get there, it's okay, I'm happy to Jac: I'm so needy, I'm sorry Savannah: you're allowed to want me & not be sorry Savannah: I definitely don't see it as a negative Jac: Good Jac: I haven't done this before Jac: I don't ever wanna be too much Savannah: well, you aren't doing it alone & I trust us more than the opinion of a random American girl I'm currently stuck living with Savannah: any amount of reassurance you need for any reason, it's fine, I promise Jac: 😌 I'm cool Jac: but thank you Jac: there's no one else I would want to or could do this with Savannah: there's no need to thank me, I'll do anything to make sure you feel happy & secure Jac: and I intend to return the favour, always Jac: in every way available to me Savannah: 😊 I know, I meant what I said earlier, you're very good at this, first time girlfriend or not Jac: I've got to be a worthy competitor and you're 👼🏾 Savannah: Catholic school taught me a lot about 👼🏾 too Jac: I'm so relieved they still had to give you an actual education as well Jac: I can only imagine how hard Science could've fallen by the wayside Savannah: still, I will not be enrolling my 👶🏾👶🏾👶🏾👶🏾 when they're old enough Jac: at least you don't have to make that decision for a while yet Savannah: which is just as well because my immediate response was 'thank god', how blasphemous Savannah: 🙏🏾 hasn't guided this decision but there is a LOT of  🙌🏾 involved Jac: he'd approve if that was the only precaution you took, like Savannah: his approval would have to eclipse my actual father's disapproval, which is BEYOND unlikely Jac: 🙏🏾 is less vocal Jac: it's more signs than 🔊 Savannah: I think that's ⛪️ dependent, some 🙏🏾🙌🏾 is very vocal Jac: actual GOD himself though Savannah: hmm, well he is a man Savannah: it makes communication more challenging Jac: I'm sure little Savannah would've said herself Savannah: child me would've believed that god is a woman, another dream shattered for sure Jac: a woman wouldn't have done so poorly Jac: it's a compliment, really Savannah: exactly, with the zero communication, it'd be like excuse me honey, why are you so angry at me that you've blocked me? Jac: that kind of drama is reserved for me Savannah: not even, I know what I did to you Jac: you didn't do anything to me, not on purpose, I always knew that Savannah: it wasn't on purpose but that doesn't mean it's okay Savannah: I hurt you anyway Jac: We were both hurt and hurting Jac: it was a lot Savannah: yes, but it's important that you don't make excuses for me simply because of how much you want to forgive me Jac: I won't Jac: I can just recognize my role in everything too Jac: as well as the other factors that neither of us could control Savannah: ^^ we're not going to get hung up on it to the extent that it ruins everything, but we can & will acknowledge it all so that doesn't either Savannah: I do love a balancing act 😄🙄 Jac: You do it flawlessly Jac: but we don't have to examine our past and our current behaviour constantly Jac: night's off are self-care Jac: tonight can be one of them, we'll just be Savannah: okay Savannah: I don't know why it feels like I haven't seen you in a really long time, I swear I didn't fully disassociate during my freak out earlier Jac: I feel it too Jac: judge away, everyone Jac: we're making up for lost time Savannah: they'd understand if I actually let them spend time with you instead of stealing you away on sight Jac: I can't pretend to be devastated Jac: you're the most interesting to me Savannah: I can't pretend I regret it either Jac: 🥰 Jac: we have plenty of time to socialize Jac: and we do, with people who are relevant, like people on our course and the psych society Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: It's not my fault she isn't looking over my shoulder when I'm super active in both of those group chats Savannah: I was literally setting up a study group before she cornered me, excuse her Jac: 🙄🙄🙄 I don't care for her at all, even if she's brought a potential problem to our attention before it was Jac: like thanks but still, bye though Jac: maybe the rest of her art history course does NOT love her either 😬 like if YOU'RE lonely, just say Savannah: mhmm Savannah: if anybody understands loneliness, we do Jac: right, if the ego was taken out of it, we'd try to spend time with her, and loads of other people in your dorm etc would too Jac: she's not helping herself rn Savannah: I also totally understand overconfidence as a front for insecurity, like hello??! She could have an ally in me if she'd approach things differently Jac: 🤞 she gets there before the year is out Jac: I don't want anyone struggling, seriously Jac: but I know forcing friendships when they aren't happening naturally isn't healthy Jac: never mind accepting people's toxic behaviour when we're actively trying not to do or be that Savannah: I couldn't agree more Savannah: though, despite what I said before about her not flirting with me, there is a very high possibility she'll fall in love with you if you keep being so perfect Savannah: everyone will Savannah: it's not as if she has to like girls to appreciate your intelligence, empathy or compassion, even if understanding your resilience & determination is clearly a harder task for her right now Savannah: a beautiful soul is a beautiful soul Jac: 🥺 Jac: Baby Jac: beautiful recognizes beautiful, that's all I have to say Jac: you make me feel so much better than I've ever thought I am Savannah: I can't say if I achieve nothing else while I'm here I'll be satisfied, because you know me better than that, but I am proud to be able to list that as an ongoing one because I've never met a better person than you Savannah: you deserve to feel it Savannah: & if you are what you love, what a good person you are shamelessly works in my favour too Jac: you're the most incredible person I've ever known Jac: it just sounds like a baseless compliment, there's no way to adequately put it, at least not without some serious time and work to try Savannah: not from you, there's no such thing Jac: I'm not the one that can write songs, sadly Savannah: but you could write a song I'd like more Jac: 😅 Savannah: I know he's your brother but no Jac: Don't worry, not a weird clause that to date me you have to think his music is amazing Jac: I'd actually hate that, to be honest Savannah: I'm beyond relieved Jac: I'm relieved no one here knows who he is, or who I am in relation Jac: that was getting annoying, towards the end Savannah: poor boo, I can't even imagine Jac: oh well Jac: this fresh start is going better than I could have even dreamed on my craziest day Savannah: me too & you're really keeping me sane Jac: God knows we've got to get through this experience and THRIVE Savannah: ^^ 👏🏾 Savannah: We will, failure to do so is literally not an option Jac: Exactly Jac: I refuse Jac: to let either of us Savannah: speaking of, these notes are done Savannah: so I'll be there soon Jac: I'll come out with the blasphemy too Jac: because I need to see you so bad now Savannah: It's mutual Jac: Hurry Jac: but don't forget your coat, it's cold Savannah: 🥰 I totally would have for the same reason I don't think either of us can be held responsible for what we're about to say, so thank you Jac: I can't let you freeze Jac: even though warming you up is beyond a welcome responsibility Savannah: & I can't lie, my coat is more fashionable than practical, I'll still need you Jac: You've got me Jac: shower, tea and all the bed cuddles you could want Savannah: you're going to make me cry again Jac: sweetie Jac: you can cry but wait 'til you're inside and with me so we don't have to thaw out the icicle teardrops Savannah: [a picture of her with that glitter tears filter than samantha loves so much because sadly I don't actually have one] Jac: Wow Jac: that's my girlfriend Savannah: I can't get over hearing that from you Jac: I can't get over saying it Jac: even just to myself Savannah: It sounds so different when a boy says it Jac: Yeah? Savannah: I don't even know how to explain it, it's like it stripped me of something instead of giving me something Savannah: it felt like, oh, I'm just your girlfriend now, okay Jac: like a kind of diminishment of who you are Jac: not the pride to be with you and know you and love you Jac: I see that Jac: I was never anyone's girlfriend, but that's the feeling I got from them Jac: a title for THEM not YOU Savannah: of course you understand, you always do Jac: not that I was bothered what they thought Jac: but it would have been upsetting if I was, definitely Savannah: I hate that Jac: it's okay, that's all over Savannah: I'm going to make you so happy Jac: I know you will
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young k - did i mention? part two
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«and i would give my kingdom for
just one kiss»
It had been two weeks since that night, and Brian couldn't forget about her. He tried his everything to see her around campus, but he wasn't lucky. He was also very busy with royal meetings, so that made it even harder to find her. And he, being stupid, forgot to ask for her number.
She was all he thought about. Her smile, her laugh, her eyes... he hadn't felt that way with anyone, so he had no idea what this feelings were. He just knew he wanted to be with her.
– Are you ready? – Sungjin stood in the door frame, arms crossed –. Because you should. We're leaving in five minutes.
Brian sighed. Today was the birthday of Lady Alexandra, the daughter of Earl Barrington. He didn't want to go, especially because his parents wanted them to get acquainted. And she wasn't a nice person either. But duty is duty.
On the other side of town, [y/n] looked at herself in the mirror.
– I don't know Jae. Is this really a good idea?
Jae was the son of the King's right hand. They met at a college party, the only party y/n went to. They kicked it off immediately. He didn't want to go alone to the party, and since it was allowed to have a plus one, he decided to invite her to spend some time together.
– Of course it is!! Brian won't know what hit him – and maybe to help her with her big crush.
[y/n] blushed and looked at her image again. She was wearing a satin ivory dress. The V-neck showed her décolletage, along with some freckles. It was a long dress, with a princess line. Her dark hair was down, wavy. For her makeup, her lips were a dark red, but the rest was very simple, since she didn't want to exaggerate it.
– And you look gorgeous – she smiled at him and hugged him.
– Thank you for this Jae, you're the best.
– Oh I know.
They laughed and made their way to the birthday ball. They were jamming to music, not caring about what their driver would think. And after a couple more songs they arrived at the building. [y/n] was mesmerized. It was enormous. There were people arriving in limousines, guards standing at the door, and the outdoor decorations were beautiful.
Jae showed the guards his invitation and both of them entered with no problems. There they met Dowoon and Wonpil. Wonpil was the prince of The Orville Kingdom, a neighbor country. He was also studying at the Lewis Lemore University and they met thanks to Jae introducing them one day.
[y/n] tried to see and find Brian, but she couldn't find him. She didn't know what she would do once she saw him, to be honest. It would certainly be awkward, for both of them. She shook those thoughts off and had some fun with the guys.
Brian was on the way to the party. Two hours later. The limousine had a problem, so they had to rent another one, and it wasn't easy considering almost everybody was invited. He just wanted to get there, see his friends and have some fun.
Once he finally arrived, all eyes turned to see him. Everybody bowed and Lady Alexandra went straight to greet him. He wished her a happy birthday and thanked for the invitation, while she was trying to get him to dance with her, to which he answered with a "maybe later". He wanted to excuse himself and look for his friends, but she wasn't letting him go that easily.
Then he heard it. That laugh. He thought he may be hallucinating, but then he heard it again. He turned around and saw his friends, Jae, Dowoon and Wonpil, even Sungjin was with them. And then he saw her. Their eyes met and it was as if they were the only ones in the room. She looked astonishingly beautiful, and Brian couldn't keep his eyes off her. [y/n] was so happy to see him again, but she had to control herself, since they weren't alone this time.
Brian excused himself and made his way towards her. He first greeted his friends, and then faced her. He took her hand and kissed it, just like the last time they met.
– [y/n], what a pleasure to see you again. You look beautiful.
– Thank you, Your Highness. You look good too.
Lady Alexandra was fuming. Who was her and why was Brian so attracted to her? She was sure she didn't invite her, and she wasn't going to accept someone stealing Prince Brian from her.
– I'm sorry, but I don't think you were invited. So please, get out of my birthday party – that took all of them by surprise.
– Look –Jae said. He wasn't going to let her treat [y/n] like that –. In your invitation was clearly stated that people were allowed to have a plus one, and she's mine, so she's allowed to be here.
– I meant a royal plus one, and she clearly isn't one. It doesn't matter how nice she dresses herself, she's still a commoner. And I don't want commoners in my party. People like her are way below us, and they don't deserve to attend glamorous parties like this one. I really can't understand how you can get acquainted with her.
Brian was shocked. How could she treat her like that? Jae on the other hand was ready to throw fists, but [y/n] put a hand on his shoulder while whispering "I got this".
– Lady Alexandra – she curtsied –. First of all, happy birthday. It's a great party – Alexandra rolled her eyes –. If you want me to leave that badly, don't worry, I'll leave.
– Thank god –she was ready to leave, but [y/n]'s voice made her stay.
– But with all due respect, Lady, you don't have the right to talk to people like that only because you're a royal. Wether you like it or not, we're all humans and we bleed the same. And your title certainly doesn't give you the right to mistreat others – Lady Alexandra was silent –. I wish you an amazing party. If you'll excuse me.
[y/n] left the ballroom with her head up high, glad to have told her off. But once she exited the building, sadness took over her. She was having a great night, and Brian had just arrived. She told herself it was destiny, it meant she didn't have to be there and that they weren't supposed to be together. Her apartment was on the other side of town, so she decided to call a taxi.
In the ballroom...
– Wow, that was badass – Jae was the first to react. He was really proud of her, she didn't let Lady Alexandra bring her down.
Brian's feelings were mixed. He loved how [y/n] told Alexandra off, but he was really mad at Alexandra for making her leave.
– She was right, you know? – Lady Alexandra turned to look at him –. You should not treat your people like garbage just for the reason they're not of royal descendance. I hope you learned a lesson today, Lady Alexandra. Now, if you'll excuse me.
Brian exited the building, looking for [y/n]. He wanted to reassure her that what Alexandra told her wasn't true, and that she didn't deserve being treated like that. She deserved to be treated like a princess. After a couple of minutes wandering off, he realized she must have gone home. He texted his friends to come out and once they did, they took a limousine to the castle.
They went straight to the bar. It was the place they met every Saturday to talk about their week and have some drinks. They all got comfortable and sat down. Brian took a shot straight away and then put his head on his hands.
– Hey, it's everything okay? – asked Dowoon, worried about his friend.
– No, it's not. I just don't know what to do – he said, frustrated.
– Why don't you tell us what's bothering you?
– We all know it's about [y/n] but tell us the details.
– That's the problem. I don't know what this is. I just know that since I met her I've been feeling happier, more alive. She's funny, down to earth, kind, and gorgeous. I have the feeling she understands me better than anyone else. I dream of her every single night, and I just want to be next to her. Damn, I would give my kingdom for just one kiss.
– Dude, you're in love with her – said Jae –. And you should do something about it soon.
[y/n] was in the library, doing some research for her homework. It had been a month since the ball incident, and she hadn't talk to Brian since then. Sure, she saw him around campus, but she hided every single time, too embarrassed to actually talk to him. She hadn't forget about him though. Indeed, she dreamt about him almost every night, which wasn't good for her. She needed to come to terms with the fact that he was a prince, and she was your average girl. She just wasn't good enough for him.
It was really cold outside. Christmas was just around the corner, only one week of college left and she could go home again. She used to think college would be fun, and it was, but it had been stressful the last couple weeks. So she really needed a break.
She finished her research, and told herself she would do the rest later. She put her coat and scarf and left the library. Outside, the sun was shining, making the snow glitter. She smiled and enjoyed the cold breeze in her face.
– Beautiful, isn't it? – she jumped at the voice next to her. She looked at the person and there was Brian, smiling at her.
– Your Highness – she curtsied.
– I thought we talked about this [y/n]. I'm just Brian for you. Now, I believe I promised to make it up to you after our spontaneous rendezvous in Alevine. So, if you'll allow me – he took her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers, making [y/n] blush.
They started walking. [y/n] had no idea where they were going, but she was excited to spend some time with him. She noticed people looking at them, and covered her face more with her scarf.
– Brian, are you sure about this? People are staring, and I don't want them to think bad about you.
– [y/n], I've never been so sure about anything in my life.
Her heart jumped at his words. His hand felt so warm against her and, to her surprise, they fitted perfectly. Maybe they could be together after all. She shook her head, she shouldn't get too ahead of herself.
They arrived at the town's skating rink. It was outdoors and it the center of town, near the castle. There were some people ice skating. [y/n] could hear the sound of metal against ice and the people's murmurs and that made her smile. Brian rented some ice skates and sat down. He first helped [y/n] get into hers, and then put his. They went together and he was the first to step on the ice. He glided across the ice with ease and grace, looking like a natural. It was as if he was meant to be on ice. [y/n] was looking at him with great admiration.
He glided towards her and offered her his hand. She took it and got into the rink. She tripped and took his other hand and he helped her stabilize herself, while both were laughing. They began to skate with their hands intertwined, and chatting away. They took different ways, skating alone for some time and [y/n] felt  beautiful and calm while skating. It was had been a long time since she last ice-skated, so she was really happy Brian brought her there. A while later, they decided to have a race.
– I'm totally winning this - said [y/n], being confident.
– We'll see about that – Brian said and winked at her.
At first, Brian was in first place. But after a while, [y/n] caught up. She really wanted to win, and skated a bit faster than she was used to, making her fall. She laughed hysterically while feeling the cold pain. Brian was laughing too as he helped her up. Unexpectedly, his hand drifted to her hip. It settled there and pulled her closer. She inhaled sharply. She was against his warm chest, chiseled to perfection. Must he be so perfect? His breathing quickened as did hers. His head was angled slightly to the side as his lips came closer and closer to hers. Her heart fluttered inside her chest. He kissed her and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. Time stopped, the people around them disappeared. It was just the two of them.
He drew away and rested his forehead on hers. That kiss was better than anything he imagined. Their lips fitted like two puzzle pieces. It had only been one kiss, but he knew he was addicted to her. She was the half that made him whole.
– I've been wanting to do that since the first time I saw you – he smiled and pulled away.
[y/n] was still on cloud nine. No reaction was coming out of her, making Brian anxious. She just couldn't believe what had happened. He took her chin softly and made her look at him. He smiled sweetly at her and she smiled back. It was a perfect moment.
He held her hand and they exited the rink. Once they took the ice skates off, Brian walked her to a nearby bench. They sat in silence for a while, looking at each other, until Brian spoke up.
– I really like you. No, I'm in love with you. You came into my world and rocked it. You made me happier. Love was something I only knew from fairytales, and my parents. But honestly, I never thought that it could happen to a guy like me. But look at what you've done – he chuckled slightly –. I just want to be with you every day from now. I want to go on dates with you, I want to show you off, I want my parents to meet you - [y/n] thought she was dreaming. Was he really confessing to her right now? –. What I'm trying to say is, [y/n], would you be my girlfriend?
A big smile formed on her face, reaching her eyes. The love of her life had just admitted being in love with her and asked to be her girlfriend. And come on, we all know the answer.
– Yes, a thousand times yes!
And they lived happily ever after.
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