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#but also eventually in this process i will one day have to remember I'm so bad at dodging things and maybe then i'll make it different
gemsofthegalaxy · 3 days
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Yes, Stolas did spring this on Blitz and he absolutely should have let Blitz process it, Stolas certainly created a scenario with a self fulfilling prophecy by scripting a conversation and being so sure Blitz didn't return his feelings that almost anything Blitz said would have gotten under Stolas' skin and been a sign of failure, probably
I do still want to challenge the idea that Blitz would be 100% blindsided by this confession and it's coming out of nowhere
Yes, as the audience we know much more about how deep Stolas' feelings are, we see it clearly and plainly on the screen, but it's not like Blitz has had 0 hints
One of the most telling scenes in the show was when Blitz was ranting to Fizz about how Stolas sees him as an exciting sexual conquest, but in the midst he lists off a ton of non-sexual, sweet things Stolas does like try to ask him about his day and whatnot.
We also know from the encounter with Striker that Blitz honestly kind of thought Stolas was invincible, he wasn't worried about him getting hurt and neither was Stolas at first- so why, then, in episode two did Stolas insist he needed a bodyguard and why did Blitz eventually go along with it? Why waste an entire day of work just to go to a carnival with some pompous asshole? To my memory they didn't even bang or anything like that. Obviously Stolas used some sexual language but ultimately he just wanted to spend time around Blitz, maybe show his daughter that Blitz was protective and capable or something, idk, and what could Blitz possibly conclude from this other than Stolas at the very least just wants to be around him a bit more?
These are only two examples from the top of my head, not even mentioning Stolas' excitement over the romantic context of the invite to Ozzie's and how he acted afterwards, and there are probably a few others I'm not remembering right now.
Obviously, none of this means that Blitz should have expected a sudden love confession or been prepared for it, but even in the start of the episode we see Blitz acknowledge he's not really sure where they're at, things are at risk of getting complicated and he's trying to avoid that, he wants it to stay purely sexual where he's comfortable but something has given him reason to suspect it's not, because his entire half of the song is him declaring he's worried about Stolas trying to change their arrangement so he's gotta focus on the sex.
Again- Stolas should have given him a minute. But this did not come out of nowhere on his side of things and acting like Blitz has 0 clue that Stolas has deeper feelings for him is ignoring, like, large chunks of previous episodes and even parts of this episode that have established otherwise.
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loveletterworm · 1 year
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Yesterday all my creative efforts were devoted to making a chicken wrap for lunch so i forgot what i was supposed to be working on with the viddyo games. So now i’m just arbitrarily putting numbers on the screen
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euovennia · 1 year
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headcanons for simon being the mom/dad friend to reader and her just eating that shit up? like yeah, that giant intimidating guy wearing a skull mask is my best friend. he’s really cute right? (he is)
anon your brain is huge and i love it, thank you for such a gorgeous request! just want you to know that your second request will be up sometime soon, i just wanted to split them! thank you again for requesting, i hope you enjoy <3
pt. 2
fair warning to anyone reading, this is my first time writing headcanons (more like a short story with bullet points because my oh my i got carried away) so please don't shoot! anyway, i've got some ideas rolling around in my head so just jump into it:
let's get one thing straight
becoming friends with a man like simon is not an easy task
while you may be somewhat quick consider him a friend because you're both skilled enough to have made to the 141, it takes a lot longer for him to also consider you a friend
the process of getting him to this point is an arduous journey and some people (probably gaz and rudy bc i can see these two being equally terrified of this man) will not hesitate to tell you to cut your losses and leave him alone
i reckon simon is the type to verbally tell you this himself
and maybe for a bit you do leave him alone
but then one day you see him sitting alone in the commons area with what you deem to be the saddest plate of dinner ever and you just crack
cue you sliding into the seat in front of him with your tupperware full of homecooked food you'd stashed away the night before
naturally he gets frustrated and a maybe a lil annoyed so he goes to leave
but then you slide your tupperware of food over to him and his movements just kinda stop as he stares at you with his typical ghost stare
think 👁️👁️
he'll push the container back toward you causing you to push it back toward him
it becomes an almost vicious cycle before he finally snaps and spits out something like, "what's your fuckin' problem?"
to most he's a scary man with an even scarier voice so that would've been where most people drew the line (let's face it though, most people probably wouldn't have sat with him in the first place)
but all you can focus on is the piss poor excuse of a meal he'd retrieved from the mess hall so you just push it back toward him one final time with a simple, "eat."
he'll narrow his eyes and straighten his posture in an attempt to scare you off but when that doesn't work he'll tell you something along the lines of, "i'm spitting it out if it's shite"
he does not spit it out
from that day on, you'll seek him out with two tupperware containers filled with whatever you'd cooked up the night before and offer it to him
the first few times he's hesitant to accept simply because he doesn't wanna get used to the unusually kind gesture but it eventually gets to a point where he just stops getting a plate from the mess hall and instead waits around for you to feed him
these small dinners you share make it nearly impossible for simon to avoid your talking
he almost debates getting up and leaving a few times but then he remembers he'd be eating soggy meat and vegetables if it weren't for you so he decides to entertain it
and to the surprise of absolutely no one he eventually starts warming up to you, even throwing in a few comments and sarcastic quips of his own
and after a long while of having these dinners with you, he decides he likes it – he likes hearing you talk, whether it be about how you and gaz hid price's hat somewhere on base and blamed it on soap or what the latest celebrity gossip is
so what does he do?
he tries to block you out
it doesn't work because you're a stubborn little shit and refuse to let him fall back into his bubble of solitude and self pity
and he eventually realizes this so he just kinda accepts it after a while (more like a week)
and the two of you become quite chummy
well
as chummy as one can be with a person as closed off as ghost
instead you always being the one to seek him out come dinner time, he'll be the one to start finding you
it's a surprise
a delightful one
but still a surprise
his short, clipped responses will morph into longer, more thought out ones as your friendship continues to develop and you can't help but notice just how smart he really is
despite his everything that's happened to him in the past, he's actually quite in tune with the emotions of other people; his observational skills are off the charts
so you'll eventually start asking him for advice on anything and everything, even if it's not something that pertains directly to you because his wisdom outside the battle field is something to truly behold
it's amazing what can be solved without heavy loads of artillery and violence!
anyway
simon quickly becomes very used to this dynamic
you two having dinner, talking about everything and nothing all at once and while he may never verbalize it, he truly does appreciate it
he'd convinced himself long ago that his life was just cursed and that the people he loved and held closest to him were always destined for terrible things so he just closed himself off
he put on the mask and became ghost whereas simon was kept tucked away in a place no one even bothered to try and discover
but then you stumbled your way into his heart with your homemade food and endless chatter and he can't help but indulge himself
maybe having a friend isn't all that bad
and so the dinners/mini therapy sessions continue
until one day you don't show up
while he is a bit disappointed, simon decides to let it go because you've had dinner with him for god knows how long now
you probably just wanted a day to yourself and he understands that so he doesn't pry
even when he barely force himself to finish the sludge smacked onto his plate from the mess hall – how was he so comfortable eating that for so long?
but you don't show up the next day
or the next
and by the fourth day simon is just downright angry
and a little sad and worried
but mostly angry
who do you think you are to waltz in his life, make yourself cozy in his extremely tight knit circle, and then just leave him high and dry with no goodbye? (wow that rhymed)
if you're gonna ditch him like this then he's gonna make sure you sit through the awkward pain of saying it to his face
he spends an embarrassing amount of time looking for you before he even thinks to check your room
he walks up to your door, fully prepared to slam that door open and confront you
but then he hears you fall into a particularly nasty coughing fit paired with a muffled groan of agony and suddenly it just clicks
you got yourself sick
tempted as he is to simply walk away, he knows deep in his heart he can't do that to you
which is why you open up your door to see ghost awkwardly standing there with a tray of hot soup, water, and some medicine
you nearly cry in your haze of sickness
you'd spend the past four days miserably rotting away in your bed and to suddenly have simon by your side offering you soup and medicine? it was almost too much
ever since that day there had been a gradual shift in your friendship
it started with you two coordinating who would bring dinner on which days
but then it turned into simon being the one to bring dinner nearly everyday
which then evolved into him finding you throughout the day and offering small snacks and drinks
but he's a busy man and he can't do this every day so he'll settle for sending a simple message of, "you doing ok?"
and most times you say yes
but on the off chance you say no he'll take a few minutes to message you back and forth until you feel at least a little better (no this is not achieved by him sending you bad dad jokes, he would never do such a thing!)
but eventually the man just gets so tired of constantly going around base trying to find you that he'll simply just start to linger around you whenever he's free
gruff words of assurance and friendly pats on the shoulder become a staple for the masked man
when the team becomes privy to the newly formed friendship between the two of you, it's almost scary
like
imagine this 6'4 beefy mountain of a man hanging around someone half his size just chilling
i reached the character block limit how awkward anyway
it's odd and you know it is so you'll play into it
like that time you loudly asked ghost to grab the blanket from your room while you two were sitting on the couch in the common area while the rest of the team filed in
and him immediately going to grab it while the team are completely gobsmacked when he promptly returns with your blanket in hand
cue soap asking ghost the same thing a few days later and only receiving a glare in return along with a stern, "i'm not your maid, johnny."
then he just walks away leaving soap to feel like an idiot
it becomes apparent very quickly that simon has a favorite and that favorite is you
especially when he's the one to sweep you up into a quick hug with a quick pat on your head after the team completes yet another mission
you make it a point to squeeze onto simon just a tad tighter when you see soap looking over in complete bewilderment
seriously, how did you tame the legendary ghost?
and honestly?
you're not quite sure yourself
you just soak it in because you'd be a fool not to
maybe one day you'll ask him yourself
maybe you won't
doesn't matter either way because at the end of the day you're the only one who can proudly call ghost your best friend
even if he doesn't refer to you as the same
he totally does he just never says it out loud because he's secretly terrified you don't feel the same
regardless
you two are very much attached at the hip
what with you constantly getting yourself into trouble all around base and ghost not wanting you piss off the wrong person
he is very much your guard dog and you make it everyone's problem
soap went too hard on you during your sparring session? ghost is already glaring at him
gaz won't stop bugging you when you're actually trying to get your work done? ghost is pushing him out the door
price is about to lecture you for something gaz and soap framed you for? ghost is quick to rat them out
it's sweet really, the friendship you have
it warms your heart thinking about it
and it warms his too
even if he won't admit it
he's just grateful you didn't give up on him even when he wanted you to
because he's found that, sometimes, it's nice to have a friend
and he's glad it's you
:)
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pillowspace · 5 months
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Fnaf au ramble yada-yada
New thought that's stuck on my mind. One of those time travel fix-it Michael AUs, except Charlie also time travelled after Pizzeria Simulator. Neither of them knows the other remembers everything, and both are too distracted trying to comprehend the sheer normalcy of their own realities to really process how different the other person's acting.
Henry's very concerned as to what's happened to his daughter, as Charlie's suddenly become much more still and quiet, lacking her typical innocent cheer. She forgets to eat or drink until Henry reminds her to, and she won't tell him why she suddenly seems so on edge all the time. She was in terrible conditions as the Marionette for years, she has no idea how she's meant to be a person again. She sits in the same room as Michael and just stares at him, and whenever she's not looking, Michael's staring at her, thinking about a strange history that no longer exists but has put a massive barrier of tension between them both.
But there's also one issue with the time travel.
Neither Charlie nor Michael can remember when any of the deaths are to happen until they're happening.
So one day, Charlie gets locked out of the pizzeria in the rain. At first she pounds on the window, but then she stops. She backs away from it. There is a powerful, suffocating dread in her chest that is so much more than just her aversion to rain, demanding her attention. Something is very, very wrong. Now becoming even more nervous, she tries to recall how she had gotten back inside the building that day.
And she realizes.
She does not have a single memory past this point.
And before a car can even turn the block, Charlie runs.
At the same time, Michael was also running. He had regained the memory of this being the day Charlie dies, and is determined to make it to her before his father can. Only to turn the corner and, sprinting as fast as he can, crash directly into Charlie who had been doing the same. Michael barely has time to regain his focus on the sidewalk before Charlie is already scrambling back up and running past him to gain more distance.
So... life successfully saved! By... herself. What changed? And why had she been running so scared if, when Michael asked, his father hadn't even seen Charlie that day...? And as time goes on for even longer, Michael slowly starts to pick up on Charlie's oddities. Out of everything, it sticks out to him that when her birthday arrives, a birthday that she had never had the chance to see before, she only makes one request:
She wants a music box.
Eventually it'll have to fall into place.
Cassidy could have also time travelled, but I'm hesitant on that because the AU might just end the second they find a fatal weapon. Then again, I could give Cassidy the added bonus of not remembering who their killer even was, so one day they just grab Evan by the shoulders like "Evan. Evan, there is an imposter among us and I have no idea who it is, I'm going to explode. Tell me if you see a murderer" and he's like "there's a WHAT?? D':"
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You mentioned ghoul scent markings-- can you elaborate on that? Explain it and dump any other thoughts you have about it?
So, I feel like ghoulification would heighten all of the senses (*within the confines of what tissues can remain intact over long spans of time, like centuries; we see older ghouls, especially, with things like cataracts, etc. that would would obviously impact your perception), but the sense of smell especially. Smell is widely considered to be the "weakest" of the human senses, but if you were constantly regenerating the smell receptors that are physically closest to your brain, along with having basically one massive nostril, I'd think you'd at least smell SOMEWHAT more effectively.
I've seen people assume that, as ghouls eventually lose their noses to decay, they have no sense of smell, and (absolutely no disrespect or anything) I find that sort of funny. The olfactory sense ultimately originates in the brain, like any other sense, and the smell receptors that pick up on odors are not only found in the cartilaginous parts of the nose AKA the part that would rot off.
Scent memory is also one of the strongest kinds of memory, as the olfactory bulb that processes smells is located very close to the amygdala and the hippocampus, the memory centers of your brain. For this reason, I think that many ghouls, but particularly ferals, would be incredibly sensitive to smells, even if their particular "nose" is weak from decay. I'd imagine that ferals, as they slip further and further into the sort of aggressive, rotting dementia state we see them in, would still be able to connect with some human memories through smells. I think this may be one of the things that draws them to people so easily, even when you're trying to sneak past them.
Imagine moldering away for years and years, rational and conscious thought basically lost to you, and then, for just a breath, you smell a long-lost loved one's perfume, a favorite food you haven't tasted in decades, a fresh rain after a long, long dry spell. Just for a moment...you can remember.
All that to say that I think smell would be a very big deal for ghouls. Especially the smell of people they care about. One day, the memory of that smell may be quite literally all they have left.
I'm not sure most of them would be conscious of the fact that it's scent marking, but it wouldn't be uncommon to find ghoul lovers (ghouls who are lovers AND those who love ghouls) swapping clothing, reveling in their partner's smell enveloping them and vice versa. Taking their lover around other ghouls and knowing that the fact that the others can smell them all over you means they know you're theirs. Ghouls smelling another ghoul on you and knowing all your business without you even having to say anything.
(Plus...it's just a fun excuse to not have to pull out, you know?)
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Chibs with a reader around the same age as Juice and they do it on Chibs’s bike at the club house thinking nobody is there but they get caught by a few of the members
Teach Me How to Ride.
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Synopsis - Chibs is teaching you how to ride (in more ways than one).
Pairing - Filip 'Chibs' Telford x Female Reader
Warnings - smut. cursing. age gap.
Age Rating - 18+
Word Count - 1k
Author's Note - thank you SO much for this request, anon. it made me feral. that old man owns me and i'm not sorry about it. always open to SOA and chibs requests. <3
Masterlist. Inbox.
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"Any weekend plans, darlin'?"
You smile at the blonde man sat on the other side of the bar you're wiping down.
"Nothing too exciting. I think I'm gonna try and get out on my bike."
His brows raise in curiosity.
"You have a bike now?"
"Yeah. Chibs is teaching me how to ride."
"I bet he is."
You roll your eyes at the snickers that come from the other guys who are dotted around the room.
"Real mature, Jax."
"Is he charging you for these lessons, or are you paying him in other ways?"
You put down your cloth and look up.
"I'll jump over this bar and beat your ass right now, Tig. Don't think I won't."
They all laugh, and you can't help but chuckle along with them. You know they mean well. They'd do anything for you, in a heartbeat.
Eventually, the sun sets, and all of the guys make their way home. You've been restocking the bar, not minding staying a little later if it means you get the job done.
You're crouched down filling the fridge when you hear a familiar Scottish accent echo though the clubhouse.
"You still here, sweetheart?"
You stand up and smile at him, grinning wider when he reciprocates.
"Still here. Trying to get my shit done."
"That's my girl. Always working ten times harder than the rest of us."
You laugh, throwing him a beer.
"You're here late. How did the run go?"
"All good, nothing to worry about," he winks.
You think back to Jax's comment earlier, and decide you've had enough of avoiding the truth. You want answers. You also just kind of want to know what he'll say.
"Why does everyone think we're fucking?"
Chibs practically chokes on his drink, taken aback by your sudden brashness.
"What?"
"You heard me."
He takes a moment to process, before a slow smile etches itself onto his face.
"Why do you ask that?"
"Just something Jax said earlier."
"Ignore that bastard. He doesn't think before he speaks."
You chuckle in agreement, finishing up your jobs for the day.
"You wan' a ride home?"
You nod gratefully, making sure to lock up before walking over to where Chibs is leaning against his bike. He's parked by the door, under the shelter, obscured from the yard. He slips a helmet onto your head, before standing in front of you to do up the buckle. His rough fingertips slide under your chin, clasping the straps in place. He swipes a thumb over your bottom lip gently, eyes never leaving your face.
"You're too good for me," he murmurs. "Pretty young thing like you."
"Everyone already thinks we're fucking anyway," you whisper, smirk on your face.
He chuckles lowly, before leaning in to capture your lips with his. He kisses you with need, unbuckling the helmet he just put on you and dropping it to the ground. He's grabbing at you - your hips, your ass, anywhere he can find. You've got your hands tangled in his hair, yanking roughly when he bites your lip.
The two of you waste no time. Chibs is shrugging his jacket off while unbuttoning your pants, pulling them down. You're fumbling with his belt, undoing his jeans with shaky hands. You're both high on adrenaline, desperate to feel the other person. He smashes his lips back to yours and you groan, reveling in the way he tastes like smoke and peppermint.
Chibs grabs your hips and walks you backwards, twirling you around so you're bent over his bike. You can't help but laugh, remembering what Jax had said.
"What?" he chuckles into your ear, hot and heavy against your back.
"Nothing," you giggle. "I'll tell you later. You gonna fuck me, old man, or just stand there?"
He growls under his breath and smacks your ass as punishment, smirking when you whine.
"You gonna ask me nicely, sweetheart?"
At this point, you're not above begging. Besides, you know it'll do wonders for his ego, and you don't entirely mind that.
"Please, Chibs," you whinge. "Waited so long for this."
"Oh, ya have?" he coos. "Better not keep you waitin' then."
In one smooth thrust he slides home, both of you groaning in unison. He plants a hand on the back of your neck, the other with a firm grip on your hip, providing him with leverage. He sets a steady, even pace, careful not to knock the bike over.
He tilts his hips upwards a little and you keen, seeing stars.
"Right there? Yeah? That's it, isn't it?"
You only nod in response, holding onto the motorcycle for dear life. You trust him, though. You know he won't let you fall.
"Fuck, darlin'. You feel so good."
"So close," you choke out.
"I know, I know. Can feel you squeezin' me. Come on, that's it. Good girl."
The lilt of his accent combined with the glide of his hips is lethal, sending you over the edge in no time. You see stars, heart racing and mind blank.
Your undoing is also Chibs'. He groans as he finds his release, leaning over to rest his head between your shoulders. You're both panting, chests heaving as you recover.
After a moment, the bike groans, and you both jump up, laughing as you do it. You're redressing, Chibs stealing kisses from you, when you hear a voice cut through the darkness.
"Well, shit. I was only kidding earlier."
You can hear Jax's teasing drawl before he comes into view, cocky smirk drawn across his face.
You groan as Chibs rolls his eyes and throws his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him. Both of you know you're not going to hear the end of this for a long time.
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feelbokkie · 1 year
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When you fall asleep video chatting
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☀️Feelbokkie M.list ☀️
genre: an obnoxious amount of fluff
pov: 2nd person
description: Just cute little things that happen when you fall asleep while video chatting with bf!skz.
pairing: bf!skz x reader
warnings: none?
word count: 838
©feelbokkie (2023) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.
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방 찬 (Bang Chan)
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In love
Thinks it's cute that you fell asleep
Takes a few screenshots to look at later when he misses you
Leaves the call going
Puts on background music
Not too loud so you don't wake up
Dims the lights so the brightness doesn't wake you up
Props his phone up next to his computer so he can check on you while he works
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이 민 호 (Lee Min-Ho)
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Blinks for a few seconds
Calls out your name quietly to check if you're actually asleep
Takes a screenshot
Hangs up
Not be the menace that he is
Because he is indeed one
But to save your phone battery
He knows you'll call him later when he wakes up
But he doesn't want your phone to die in the process
But at least he has the screenshot to look at
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서 창 빈 (Seo Chang-Bin)
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Shocked
Not because you fell asleep while he was talking
But because you fell asleep while he was shouting about some stupid thing that happened during the day
Just confused how you could sleep comfortably while he was yelling
He felt bad
Kept the call going because you look cute when you sleep
And because he misses you falling asleep next to him
Tried to keep quiet, for your sake
Although, if you could fall asleep while Binnie is shouting, you should be fine
Also takes a screenshot
Is walking around the boys who are of course being their normal selves
"Be quiet! Y/N is sleeping!" "You came to us!"
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황 현 진 (Hwang Hyun-Jin)
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Can't help but smile
Finds it adorable that you fell asleep
You had been complaining all day you were tired but refused to take a nap because you didn't want to miss your call with him
He had watched your eyes droop for the last 10 minutes, just waiting
Purposely told you little stories about his day to lull you to sleep
He knows you have trouble sleeping when he isn't around
Takes a screenshot
Drops his phone and wakes you up by accident
Feels bad
But also teases you
Pretends to get dramatic
"Wow, I can't believe you find me so boring that you just fall asleep mid-conversation!" "Hyun, I'm sorry!"
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한 지 성 (Han Ji-Sung)
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He was on the verge of falling asleep too, but didn't want to be first
It was an unspoken contest at this point
Both of you were saying random nonsense trying to keep yourselves awake
But he was better at it
And his voice is so soothing
So of course you fell asleep first
He took a screenshot of his victory
Kept looking at your sleeping figure until he fell asleep too
When you woke up, you took a screenshot of him, not know he also took one of you
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이 용 복 (Lee Felix Yong-Bok)
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Immediately mutes himself
He does not want to wake you up
But he also doesn't want to end the call
Takes a screenshot because you're so cute it makes his heart melt
You've been having trouble sleeping lately so he doesn't mind that you fell asleep mid call
Watches you sleep for a while
Figures you're going to be asleep for a while so he takes his phone to his desks and plays some games while you sleep
Double-triple-quadruple checks to make sure he is in fact muted
He know he can get loud when he's gaming
Periodically checks on you to make sure you're still sleeping
Pauses his game every once in a while and watches you sleep again
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김 승 민 (Kim Seung-Min)
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Feels hurt at first
Like, is he that boring that you fell asleep while he was talking?
He is not, you were just tired and the softness of his voice was calming and lulled you to sleep
Remembers that you woke up earlier than normal to watch his performance and didn't sleep well the night before so he doesn't feel hurt anymore
Finds it cute
Takes a screenshot to tease you with later
But also to look at when you two are apart
Stays there watching you for a while, finding peace in watching you sleep
Eventually hangs up the phone
But he sends you a text saying to call him when you wake up if you can
Sets the picture of you sleeping as your contact photo
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양 정 인 (Yang Jeong-In)
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Laughs
It was pretty late and you had talked about how you were going to stay up late to talk to him
Obviously you failed
Takes a screenshot and posts it to his private story
Tries not to wake you up
But also gets bored
Debates if he should wake you up to say good night
Figures you'll probably won't be able to go back to sleep if he did that
Since it's late and he's getting tired too, he gets himself ready for bed instead
Plugs in his phone and props it on his night stand
Positions his body so he can comfortable sleep but also see your face
Puts on a small night light so you could see his face if you woke up, you'd still see his face and know that he was still there
"Good night, I love you."
Buy me a coffee?
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takeme-totheworld · 5 months
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You Can't Go Home Again
I'm someone who walked away from my childhood religion almost twenty years ago, and I'm very firmly at a place in my life now where I am very happy to be through with it and have zero lingering desire to go back. I've also been out as some kind of queer person for the same almost-twenty years, and I've been out as trans for almost fifteen of those years.
If you knew absolutely nothing else about me or my life except for those major plot points, and the fact that I'm a Good Omens fan, it would be reasonable to assume that I would identify with Crowley far more than Aziraphale. At least at this point in my life. And in fact, I've seen many fans with backgrounds similar to mine say that they used to be much more like Aziraphale when they were younger, but nowadays they see far more of themself in Crowley. Which makes sense, as a trajectory for people who grew up in controlling religions and then left!
I've been trying to figure out what it is about me that makes me so automatically take Aziraphale's perspective when watching this show, even though the most aggressively Aziraphale time of my life was literal decades ago now. And I think that's probably a very complicated answer, but I realized today that I see an emotional struggle happening in him that I still wrestled with for years and years after leaving the church before I was finally able to completely put it to rest—the struggle to accept that some things can never go back to the way they were.
I seriously suffered so much over this for so long after I left the church. Despite all the damage it had done to me, my entire life had been intertwined with the church and a lot of things that were good—or at least deeply comforting in their familiarity—had also been a part of that. I had plenty of genuinely happy memories all mixed together with the harmful ones (which, in case you were wondering, is confusing as hell). There were fundamental human needs that I had only ever gotten met through the church, and as double-edged as what the church provided was, it was all I knew. Learning to get those needs met in new ways was much healthier, but it wasn't what I had always known growing up and it was a loss.
And I spent a long time refusing to fully accept that going back to any version of Christianity or the church just...wasn't ever going to be in the cards for me.
That is in the cards for some people, I know. Some folks who leave or get kicked out of ultra-dogmatic and controlling churches eventually find new homes in much more progressive and nurturing ones. And that's great! But that was never going to be my path. The process of seeing my childhood religion for what it truly was, losing my beliefs, leaving everything the church was to me further and further behind, and gradually learning who I was without it, changed me too much for me to ever be able to go back again.
I am fine with that now. More than fine. I'm healthier and happier now than I've ever been. Over time I grew into a version of myself that no longer has a church/religion/faith-shaped gaping wound in my life I'm trying to fill. But it was hard and painful and it took a really long time for me to get there. I spent a lot of my twenties and even a bit of my early thirties trying to find something...some new church community that I could be connected to in some way, that would give me back some of what I'd lost when I left my childhood church. But none of them ever did. I was never going to get the same things out of belonging to a church again, because I wasn't the same.
You can't go home again.
I see Aziraphale on that same journey and that's part of what makes my heart automatically go out to him and hurt for him, over and over again. He's still desperately holding onto the idea of a hypothetical version of Heaven and being an angel that can be home again one day. One where all the good things he remembers are still there, and still every bit as good, and all the bad parts have been fixed or gotten rid of, so that being there will be like the old times, only even nicer.
Except that even if he actually succeeded at somehow making Heaven the exact flavor of like-the-old-times-only-even-nicer that he is imagining, it wouldn't matter. Heaven is not his home anymore. He's already changed too much to be able to go back. He just hasn't accepted that yet.
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dilfprayers · 4 months
Text
My, Penitence
real!dad leon kennedy x afab!reader the content ahead may contain incest topics, sexual content, blood, p in v , noncon, "L" bombs, abuse, love bombing / manipulation & more. please turn away if this makes you uncomfortable. this your only warning ! !
an: wow this is a long one-- it was a fic that was on my mind for a while 👀 i finally have gotten to finish it after so long, might have some mistakes maybe im not entirely sure, i was in the zone writing this. ><;; i also envisioned vendetta leon for this if that helps ahhh..
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You slowly started to get desperate for your dad. It was an unusual feeling — Why would you have these feelings with him? Oh, of course it faded at some point, yeah.. But you eventually fell right back into it. You'll never understand how things happened so fast but you weren't necessarily complaining in the end. Without him, you were nothing. secretly in the back of your head with your deepest darkest secrets. Not like you had anything else going for you anyways.
You might as well be his new wife, right?
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_
You remember it like yesterday, the day you finally had confessed to your father about your sick feelings towards him. You explained it in great detail.. How he made you feel, what you specifically dreamed of. You practically spilled the beans on everything in your head.
"I know you're my dad but.."
"But?"
"I.."
You struggled to even get it out, but now it was better than never. If you didn't, he'd never know and you'll forever be in distress. Sure, you had to take your chances of flipping a coin.. Heads if he also felt the same way or was just as freaky as you. Or tails, where he'd look at you in disgust and get you some kind of therapy or something. Ooor... Maybe even lock you away for even having those kinds of thoughts. But you never thought of the 'in-between'. Hypothetically, what if he has those thoughts but feels guilty?
Hell, you didn't know. Fuck a coin flip at this point.. You wanted to just blurt it out and tell him how you felt.
"I think I'm in love with you.. You've made me feel things no other guy has and I-"
"What?"
The tone he gave off was enough to shatter your poor little heart right in that moment. You stared wide eyed while he stared back at you with a concerned look. He wasn't having it, you already knew ahead of time. He didn't even have to speak for you to understand how he was feeling.
"Sweetheart, no.. Look-"
He sighs, putting a hand on your shoulder while frowning. Leon never in his days expected to handle something of this nature, but he tried to handle it the best way he could. He wanted nothing more than to be a good father. Not.. A father who sleeps with his daughter.
"Those thoughts you are having? It's not normal.. I can't be with you." He explains, "You're my daughter. My angel, my everything. Raised you since you were a little thing. I can't just.."
Get with your own daughter? Have sexual relations with your daughter? Yeah..
You knew what the answer was. It was a solid no. He didn't continue his sentence, just stood there awkwardly, processing what was even said and how to respond again. How could you casually say that anyways?
"Sorry-"
"No, it's fine. Those feelings are normal I suppose, but it-"
"I'm sorry."
You didn't give him time to say anything else, you instantly stormed off to your room and slammed the door. Loudly at that. It rang his ears, really pushing the nail into his skin some more after that as if it wasn't bad enough earlier. He stood there for a little longer before cursing under his breath, ruffling his hair with his hand in a frustrated manner. How was he gonna deal with you after this? Who knows...
_
As if things couldn't have gotten anymore worse than it was after that 'confession' you made - a divorce happened between your parents. Your mother was yelling at your father when you came back home from work and all you saw was furniture and glass all over the floor. Your eyes were wide and your mother stormed past you without a word. Didn't even bat an eye in your direction.
"Mom!?"
You call out but it's too late, she's already in the car and rushed off. Gone. You're standing there, eyes wide and Leon in the back with nothing to say. What could he say after that? Right. Nothing. The breeze from outside was loud and so was the silence you and your father had after your mother left. She left everything behind, didn't even return later. Didn't even take you with her? Of course, it was the heat of the moment but she didn't even seem to care to have you by her side, just left you along with your dad.
This wasn't gonna end well with it just being you and him. (Considering what happened earlier that week..)
_
You weren't the type to complain about silence or anything but the silence in the house since that day had made you uneasy. Worst of all? Your father was an alcoholic now. He didn't take the divorce well and very much did miss his wife, at least from what you assumed. They were the 'shining bright' couple after all. But surely there were flaws that hid beneath it all. No relationship is perfect anyways and you knew that well enough.
But off topic of the relationship. You were worried, when he made nothing but whiskey his only 'diet' with some occasional sandwiches here and there. But it was slowly getting worse and worse by the day. You kept your distance, not really bothering to interact with him as much since you knew people under the influence of alcohol weren't entirely .. 'Okay' in the head. And yeah, yeah.. You still felt icky about the whole crush thing and how you loved your father in a different way but — You felt as if it was a phase since you haven't acted upon it for a while.
Must've actually been healing.. Maybe it was good he rejected you and you had a chance to reflect. Be a normal human being in society.
But that didn't go as planned. Things were too good to be true. Your always drunk father not doing anything to you for a while and ignoring you? Of course he wouldn't stay that way for long.
"Sweetheart."
"Hey?"
One night he was stumbling towards your room after being out for some hours, hand pressed on the door as it swung open. You jumped, pulling your headphones off while you laid there on your bed with your work all scattered around the surface. You and your father hadn't actually sat down and spoke after the divorce. It was constant repeat of:
"Hi." , "Hey." , "How are you?", "Good.."
You reply, already smelling the booze off of him from across the room. You could visibly see the eyebags from him and his unkept hair. He had his stormy blues locked on you before he groaned, slyly shutting the door and moved towards your bed, sitting down on the edge while tilting his head.
"Mm...What are you up to angel?.. Math..? Science.. Reading?"
He surely was out of it, swaying a tiny bit while keeping his gaze on you. Didn't even glance at the papers which were boldly labeled math. You were quiet, for a good reason — he practically stared you down the whole time with shaky breaths. Y 'couldn't blame him though, he did drink like it was water and was anywhere but sober.
"Math.. But, what do you want? I'm trying to finish my w-"
"You."
"What?"
"You."
You felt the skin on your hair raise when he repeated himself. You remember hearing him the last time sounding like you when you had that stupid taboo moment, almost went through with it too until you changed. Improved as a person but for him? He wasn't thinking straight. If anything, he wanted nothing more to listen to the back of his head - the deepest darkest things.
"I want you sweetheart.. Need...Need you.."
He mutters, snaking his hands along your thighs. You smack them away of course, staring at him with that wide eyed expression. You almost felt disgusting when he touched you. He was your father. Your real father.
"Dad! What the fuck, no!"
You hissed, seeing him pause after you smacked his hands away, denying his 'love'. He had stared back wide eyed too but soon enough that expression went into a furious one. He moved closer to you before pinning you down beneath him, rolling you onto your back — placing one hand down on your neck and the other on your thigh. He squeezes your thigh, looking down at you with teary, sluggish eyes.
He looked nothing like the father you knew.. He was awful.
"I'm your father.. Y 'should love me."
He says, tightening his grip on your thigh and soon after your neck. He squeezed hard.. Making you gasp for air for a moment while he nearly stopped your circulation of blood and breathing.
"Dad- gh.. D..dad!—"
You go into a state of panic. Things were happening too fast for you to even react. Your hands had smacked along his arms before you dug your nails into his skin and sobbed. He saw your tears and distress but again, the man was too far gone in the head to mentally care about 'morals'. He didn't even think they existed in this moment at all.
"You're like your mother right now..Love me to death once, then turn around and treat me like nothing."
You didn't reply, just stared wide eyed as he spoke. Doing that made things not so- Great either.
"That's it? Huh? You don't love me... What happened to when you confessed to me? — What was it... Loving your own father? Me making you feel something you never felt before when I never even fucked you or touched you?" He growls, cupping your face now which had your lips all puckered up.
"Actually.. You haven't brought it up to me again since that day.. But I've had some thought to it..."
Oh no.
Your body tensed up, hands shakily brought up to his arms as you tugged and scratched at them. Your eyes were all watery still - your throat feeling dry from his nearly choking you out for a moment. Surely, he had to have bruised it.
"N-no that's not.. It. You said it was wrong before and-"
"I lied."
He cuts you off, not even hesitating to lean in and kiss you. What the fuck..? Your eyes were wide and your body ached while his lips were pressed along yours. He kissed you passionately but sloppily. You wanted to hurl from the after taste of alcohol on his lips , still attempting to pull him off but again, nothing seemed to really work. He was much stronger than you.
"Mmh..Love you so much.. I wish I went along with your confession that day.."
He mutters into the kiss, slowly bringing his knee up in between your thighs. Panicking, you squirm like crazy and muffle out a sob — but he was so focused on this to even care about how you felt. He kept kissing you, lips molded together, saliva pouring out - it was all a complete mess.
Eventually he pulled back, leaving a string of spit from the both of your lips while grinding his knee along your crotch. Obviously, you weren't turned on. None of this had you turned on anymore. Sure, before if he did this you would have been all for it but for right now? You wanted an out from this.
"Dad stop it.. Just call for a hookup!"
You protest, trying your hardest to get him to knock it off but the more you did, the more pissed he seemed to get. He was growing impatient with you. Before you knew it, he raised his hand and smacked you across the face, making your ears ring really loud. That smack nearly took you out and it only seemed to get worse.
"I don't want a 'hookup'. I want you. Don't you understand? Why can't you just love your father. Don't you love me?"
His voice cracked, noticing you hadn't responded. Just stared to the side with a red mark across your face.
"Answer me.."
Silence.
"Answer me!"
He raises his tone— smacking you again, the ringing only getting worse and your cheeks were all swollen now. Nose eventually leaked with blood from the impact of the slaps. You teared up more at this point, the pain stinged you badly as nothing but whines came out of you. No words.
And god, that wasn't what he wanted out of you.
"..Just like your mother..."
He grunts, moving his hands to his pants - unbuckling his belt. He was doing it at a fast pace despite the state he was in as he muttered some other things under his breath that you could barely hear. Blood poured from your nose while you laid there, sniffling and shaking.
"M'gonna bring back who you were back then. I want you to love me again.."
Finally, he freed himself of his restraints and worked on you, tugging your pajama pants off and then pulled your panties to the side. Dry. Awfully dry... He frowned, staring at your puffy lips before brushing his fingers along the slit - quietly sighing.
"Not even she's happy to see me.. This isn't like you.."
He quietly said before spreading you open with his fingers, spitting on your cunt to let the spit pour down it. You could feel it, cringing really bad as you whimpered and cried. Potentially having your first with your father? That didn't sound ideal at all. You didn't want that.. So you fought, even with it being difficult.
"D..daddy.. N..no..No please.. You can't-"
"Shutup.. Let me have this... I need you to love me again."
He's prodding the tip of his cock along your barely wet hole. Saliva was there but that wasn't really much at all. You still weren't turned on by any of this to begin with.
"Need you to be.. You. Not your mother."
He moved one hand along your neck and the other on your thigh while he was in between your legs. You kept squirming and all, but you knew it was futile. Nothing was gonna work and he was gonna have his way with you whether you liked it or not. It wasn't supposed to be this way, it made your stomach twist bad. Seeing your drunk, visibly pissed father above you with his cock prodded along your entrance left you uneasy but you had to suck it up. Unfortunately.
Soon enough, he's slowly pressing his cock into you, groaning quietly from your extreme tightness. Again, you were dry with the saliva barely doing the job but he loved the feeling of your insides. You on the other hand, you felt awful. You felt the stinging pain and the pressure he added just to get his cock inside of you — But eventually he had gotten all of it inside, burying deep into you while panting and grunting above you. Then.. There it was, blood. He noticed something wet, gazing down and pulled out for a second to see some blood pouring out of you along with it coating his cock.
Normally, he'd freak out but seeing this now and realizing you'd be wet. He took the chance almost immediately.
"I'm your first? ..Ah.."
He murmured suddenly sliding back into you with ease — using your blood as lube while rocking his hips back and forth. You hated every second of it, you wanted it to end but you started to slowly falter on fighting. Laying there beneath him, feeling his fingertips on the side of your neck, brushing at the skin as he thrusted at a slow pace. But the impact was rough. He didn't even give you the time to adjust or anything, he just went for it.
"L..Leon.."
You didn't dare to call him "dad" or "daddy", you just saw him as 'Leon' during this. Not your 'dad'. He gazed down, eyes darkening when he saw you - All bruised in the face, teary eyed and body aching from the pain. He grunts, thrusting rougher now from your words. He didn't seem to like that either though, moving his hand from your neck and smacked you once again.
"Call me by what I am.."
"..I-"
"Sweetheart.."
He growls, cupping your face again while picking up the pace with his thrusts. He was getting more aggressive with you and your fragile body, nearly bruising your poor cervix from how deep he shoved himself in. He made sure to be balls deep in you, feeling your warmth, your wetness and more. He reveled in it, staring right into your eyes.
"D..daddy.."
You managed to slip that out, wincing from the tip constantly prodding along your cervix, over and over again. You were a mess, just crying instead of moaning but he was so busy enjoying your warmth. He couldn't stop himself at all even with you wanting it to end.
_
Ringing. Just more ringing.. You have no idea how long it's been while you were now laid out on your tummy. On the floor where blood was splattered everywhere and along your face. You had managed to pull away earlier but he tossed you to the ground, grabbed a handful of your hair and kept pushing your head down on the floor till your face bruised up more. You were certain you passed out from it and he violated you that whole time, probably not even noticing you were blanked out. But regardless of that — In the present setting though, you were drooling with your broken moans slipping out.
"So much better than your mother. You know how to keep a man satisfied unlike her.."
He sighs quietly, slowly slipping out of you for a moment. Dried blood and liquids were on your inner thighs while you leaked with your own fluids. He had his limits, he was getting old.. So it was a little straining when he held his climax back for such a long period of time. The man was getting old after all.
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He pumped his cock a bit over your shaken figure and groaned, letting his cum spurt out in ropes over your ass cheeks. You felt gross by the end of it but for him? He still didn't quite feel anything but satisfaction.
"I love you..."
He muttered, leaning over you and pulled the hair from over your face. You didn't say anything for a while, still recovering from the shock you have had the past couple of hours as you glance at him with swollen eyes. Silence lingered and at some point he felt a strain on his chest when he watched you quietly. That satisfaction from earlier didn't last at all. He had a uneasy expression plastered on his face, staring down at you with tears in his eyes now.
"I didn't mean to hurt you.."
He continues speaking, pulling you upwards against him in a warm embrace. You didn't have any room to speak to him and when he had you pulled up, you winced in pain from the movement. He did so much to you in one night, your body was too sore and broken down.
He stared down at you, seeing you slowly hug him back. You hated him for everything he did but his warmth and embrace was all you could really get as 'comfort'. You held onto him weakly, still not saying a word — You had nothing to say at all. You wanted nothing more but that silence you always hated.
You regretted ever admitting the choices you made that day. You should've kept your mouth shut. But the damage was already done, you couldn't do nothing more but lay there in his arms with tears streaming from your eyes which started to sting more than it already was.
"Love you, my angel...."
He repeats again, burying his face in your hair on the top of your head while his embrace tightened with you in it. You just kept still with your eyes wide open before you managed to quietly respond back.
"Love you too, dad..."
You put the idea in his head and you were the only one to blame for him acting this way.
It's your fault. Angel.
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sxcret-garden · 5 months
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HI ITS 🪐 ANON AGAIN, SO I FINALLY REMEMBERED WHAT I WAS ALSO THINKING ABT THE OTHER DAY so most likely of any of the the ateez members (i don't have a specific one you can choose BAHASHFKCNMXKD) with an s/o who is like pretty quiet in bed like bcs sometimes people take it as a bad thing but IDK i'm not super loud so it just makes me wonder :")
Aaaaaaa i'm finally getting to this as i try to empty out my askbox a bit!! Sorry for the long wait 😭 gonna answer this as an mtl, explanations are under the cut~
most
Jongho
Yunho
Yeosang
Mingi
Seonghwa
Wooyoung
San
Hongjoong
least
I put Jongho first cause I think even if you don't make noise at all he wouldn't mind, so long as you have other means to communicate whether you like what he's doing at the moment or if he should change things up a bit. Will definitely be more talkative in this case and fill the silence with praises and muttered "I love you"s, and always asks if you feel good. The type to hum in response when he does tickle a sound out of you, and if he manages to make you moan as he makes you cum, he will certainly tease you about it with a soft smile afterwards - don't be fooled though, this guy adores every single sound you make, and will figure out over time how to lure those sweet whines out of you
Yunho does like hearing your voice during sex, and even as you're making out and fooling around before getting to business, but I think he actually prefers a partner who's on the quiet side. Little whines and silent moans do so much more to him than if his partner is super loud, and you bet he'd get drunk on hearing your voice like this alone. Whispers all the things he wants to do to you in between kisses, and if all you can respond with is a weak whine against his lips he'll just feel that much more turned on (and this might lowkey make him want to ruin you....)
I think Yeosang is a bit similar to Yunho, in that he prefers a partner who isn't super loud. He does like having you talk to him during sex, because the communication makes him feel comfortable during the whole process, but if you're not one to moan a lot or to cry out when he hits just the right spot that's totally fine with him. Even just the way your breathing speeds up and becomes heavier as you're nearing your high is a sound he'll appreciate and that'll make him eager to keep going. Whisper praises into his ear about how good he's making you feel and the guy is melting under your words alone
I see Mingi as the shy type if he hasn't been with a partner for long enough, so I think he'd absolutely understand if you're not very vocal in bed - whether the reason is because you're shy about it or because it's simply not your style. However, he will encourage you to let out your voice a bit more when he's having sex with you, because he's just really really curious about all the sounds you might make while he's pleasuring you. Very patient and will do his best to ease you into the process, and whenever you let out even the most quiet of moans he'll be right there to tell you how beautiful your voice sounds to him and how much hearing you turns him on
Seonghwa would definitely be surprised if you're barely making a sound, eventually stopping what he's doing to question whether you're enjoying yourself or if you're just doing this for his sake (which he really doesn't want). It definitely feels a little unfamiliar to him at first to have such a quiet partner, but that isn't to say he wouldn't get used to it. Would definitely talk to you more than he would with a more vocal partner, and will naturally slow down a bit to make sure you're liking what he's doing. However, he would certainly also sometimes nudge you to make more sounds, because no matter how understanding he is, there are times where he's just desperate to hear your voice during sex
I put Wooyoung so low because I'm convinced he'd have sooo much fun with a very vocal, loud partner, and because I think he's very vocal as well. He too will be surprised when he learns that you tend to be very quiet in bed, and this will just instantly make him that much softer for you. Doesn't know what to do with himself when he gets to hear your soft whines and deep sighs at the way he's touching you, and will soon find himself addicted to luring those little noises out of you. He just can't stop himself and will go as far as to overstimulate you out of pure curiousity and because it's fascinating to him how you can make him feel so many feelings at once with a simple quiet mewl
Now San is one who needs the verbal communication, even if it's just you two moaning at each other's touches. Gets seriously worried if you don't make a single sound because he's scared you might not like being intimate with him or that he's set you off in some way. However, he will be soso soft for you in an instant once he hears you give him little whines and moans or even if you whisper a curse through gritted teeth - the latter especially is gonna be such a huge turn on for him. I feel like he'd naturally match your energy and sex with him is gonna be a lot softer if you're on the quiet side than if you're very vocal from the start (but that doesn't mean he won't be willing to be rough or more experimental if you ask him to!)
I feel like Hongjoong lives off of dirty talk and getting the most desperate noises out of you, which is why he's last in the list! Not to say I don't see him enjoying himself with a quiet partner, but sometimes this guy just needs someone to talk back at him and his teasing as he's fucking you, someone to whisper the dirtiest things into his ear and to let him hear the sweetest whines when he's going just a bit too slow on purpose, and sometimes also someone to shower him with praises while you're making love at the end of a rough day. Just loves hearing your voice so much and the way you talk to him during sex just turns him on the most out of everything, so he just thinks it's a shame he doesn't get to hear more of it! Though he will be the most understanding ever if you're not comfortable with the idea of being a little louder too
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whalyrae · 6 months
Text
DANCE WITH ME - CHAPTER 6
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“If you want to keep a secret, you must also hide it from yourself.”
Summary : All your life, you thought you were a beta, a simple and boring beta. Until everything change. But now that you've presented yourself as an omega, how will you manage to live and hide it from your six friends and best friend, all alphas and all in the same pack? (a/n : I'm a shit for summary I'm so sorry-)
Genre : soulmate au (of course I'm a bitch for this), omegaverse, bangtan alphas au!, omega reader, fluff, angst, eventual smut, polyamory relationships
Status : In process
Word Count : 3k
Warnings : the usual one I guess, like smut, angst, fluff (yeah its a warning for some people ) mention of depression, abusive parents (physically and morally), violence and blood, PTSD, scars, self harm,…
Tag list : @ghostlyworld @kawaiikpoplover268 @scuzmunkie @iamkookiesforyou @00ihatesnaku @stellauniverse @akemiixx01 @aceofcards05 @strxwbloody @seoul9711 @amara-mars @alex-walker-86 @yoongicatcat @xicanacorpse
A/N : Remember me ? Ah, I'm so soooo sorry for the wait, really. I'll not vent again, I already did it last weeks. I'm sorry about the quality of the chapter too… it's not really corrected, there are probably lots of spelling, conjugation, syntax mistakes… I think I've lost the little writing talent I had, really, it's so frustrating :') With this writer block it hasn't really helped either… I can't put the ideas I have in my head into words, and it's getting on my nerves too much…!! Hope you'll like it though even a little, I'll do my best for the next one ! ♥ Thank you so much for all the love and attention you give to this story, you can't imagine how much it means for me !! ♥
Also I made a playlist for the story ! If you have any songs who made you think about the story, you can share it to me and I'll add it on the playlist !
Masterlist | ao3 | wattpad | Spotify playlist
Chapter 5 // Chapter 7
☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾ ☾
The room was silent after Jungkook's explanation. He and Yoongi had not waited to go to the oldest of the two's apartments where their partners were. Fortunately, since it was so late in the day, they were all there, and reunited in the same place. 
Jungkook shared what he heard during your conversation with Wooyoung and Yeosang. When you said you were an omega. 
Jimin was the first to react. Of course, he did. 
“I can’t believe it…!” he exclaimed after a few seconds, “She’s my best friend… we’ve known each other since high school! If she were an omega, she would've told me! She can't have lied to me…”
Sitting between Hoseok and Taehyung, he brought his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs with a pout. He accepted Hoseok's embrace, who placed a kiss on his head. 
The other boys stayed silent. Some of them were quite surprised to learn this, but Namjoon, Yoongi and Taehyung weren't so surprised to hear it, something inside them knew it, they just couldn't explain it.  
"But that'd explain a lot..." Jimin added with a sigh, " she's quite... different recently..."
He obviously noticed the change in your behavior towards him recently. You were more distant and less tactile, and you tended to isolate yourself more in your room, whereas before, you spent all your free time with them, in one of their apartments. 
At first, he thought that the classes and the dancing were exhausting you physically and mentally, like him. And knowing you, you tended to isolate yourself when you weren't feeling well. But it had never lasted as long as it did. He would never have thought that the reason behind it was... that you were an omega.
"We've all noticed it, I think," Jin replied, crossing his arms and looking thoughtful.
"But if she really is an omega," continued Jungkook, "why did she hide it from us? Would she be... afraid of us or something?"
The younger’s question left the room in silence. Everyone had heard about your misadventures with alphas, the behavior of your parents, and your brothers and sisters who were themselves alphas. And even though Jimin had always been the exception to the rule in your life, and now the other boys, you still had a certain reserve towards alphas. And that was as a beta. So, if you were an omega...
“It's not as if it matters anyway,” Namjoon affirmed, “whether she's a beta, an omega, or even an alpha, she's with us, she's part of the pack. But it's true that I'm wondering why she's hiding it from us.”
"Everyone has their wounds, scars, we all do, and we know that our little Y/N has some deep ones that haven't fully healed yet..." Hoseok spoke in a soft, understanding voice, stroking Jimin's hair in a protective, reassuring way.
"It takes time to gain someone's trust, even more so when someone has suffered mistreatment, abandonment, or physical and psychological violence." added Namjoon, crossing his arms. 
Namjoon was right, and everyone agreed with him. For them, naturally, it didn't matter whether you were an alpha, a beta, or an omega. You were who you were, whatever your nature. 
Everyone also knew what you'd been through with your parents, how they treated you, how they had treated you in the past.
None of them had ever said or done anything inappropriate to you, as they would to any of them.
This was the first time in your life since Jimin that you'd been treated like a real human being with respect and consideration, with no alpha, omega or beta stuffs behind it. You were simply Y/N. That was why you'd been able to open to them, to relax and feel at ease in their presence, but there was still a way to go, they were aware about that.
“It’s easy, we can just go and ask her." Yoongi stood up, ready to leave the apartment, "there's no point in speculating and making yourself feel bad," he continued, giving Jimin a gentle look, "I'm sure she'll be able to help us clear up this issue. She's the best person to tell us about it. "
Yoongi was the most impatient of all. But inside of him, he didn't want to admit that you had hidden something from them. Something that in one way didn't matter, but in another way did, more than they or even you realized. 
“Wait hyung!” Jimin grabbed his arms to stop him. “Maybe it’s… something deeper than just a little secret she hides from us… If we go and find her now, she might panic, and things could go badly.”
Yoongi rolled his eyes but didn’t argue with him. 
“I don't want to risk losing her... I couldn't bear that.”
Jimin ran a hand through his hair as he thought about how he'd felt when he'd seen you with San earlier in the day. Even though the interaction between you had been completely innocent, he had imagined you leaving him and his companions to go with him, Wooyoung, and their pack. This simple thought had given him a painful sensation in his lower abdomen that made him wince. 
He knew you weren't interested in San, or Wooyoung, or anyone else for either (or so he thought). But despite everything, he still had this fear deep inside of him, of losing the people he loved. 
"If you'd told her how you felt about her from the start you wouldn't be in this situation." 
Jimin turned his head towards Taehyung, surprised and shocked by his words.
"Taehyung!" 
"I'm totally right, Jin hyung! He already knows! We've already talked about it several times." 
Jimin felt six pairs of eyes on him and shrugged. Yes, it was true that Jimin had confided in Taehyung several times about you. About his feelings for you that he'd kept deep inside him since high school, about his desire for you that only grew stronger with each passing day. More than once, Taehyung had tried to get Jimin to tell you how he felt, but without succeeding in convincing him.
To be honest, it wasn't really a secret that Jimin loved you and that you loved Jimin in return.
At least, it was obvious to everyone except both of you. 
“Namjoon, Yoongi, and I were best friends too…” Jin giggled, “And here we are now.”
Namjoon chuckled and nodded. They had already talked about how they had become more than friends. A drunken evening together had been enough to loosen their tongues and open their hearts. 
“We need to find a good way to figure out all of this,” concluded Hoseok, “and we should tell her, too. Everything.”
They all glanced at Hoseok. Some of them were tense, especially Jin, Jimin, and Jungkook. But Taehyung, Yoongi, and Namjoon agreed with him. 
“I don't know how you've done it, and I don't know how you've kept going all this time, Jimin,” Yoongi let out, stretching.
“Yeah, she's.... fuck I can't even describe it,” Namjoon muttered as he remembered what had happened between you and Yoongi a few weeks ago. In fact, it was that episode that had a triggering effect on him, on how he really felt about you. He also remembered noticing your change at that time, and that he would eventually get the answers to his questions. 
Now he had them.
As for Yoongi, he didn't need all that to know that he felt an irrepressible attraction to you, the same as he felt for each of his companions. 
They were all attracted to you. It wasn't the first time they'd talked about it, discussed a potential way to confess everything to you.
But how could they tell their roommate and beta friend that her seven alphas’ friends, one of whom had been her best friend since high school, all felt an attraction to her?
And what if her feelings weren’t mutuals to all of them?
“Listen…” Jimin began after few seconds, coming to his senses and straightening up, "I'll talk to her, let me talk to her first... but I need time to think about how to broach the subject, and with evaluations coming up..."
"Certainly Jimin, naturally." Namjoon replied in a gentle voice, moving closer to him and placing a kiss on his forehead, "whatever happens, you won't lose her. No one will lose anyone, I promise."
“But what do we do until then?” Asked Jungkook with a small pout.
“Well, I guess we had to wait, act normally, as we always have. We've been able to hold back all those months. Ah yes… years for you, Jimin.” Jin teased with a playful wink, ignoring the death gaze his boyfriend gave him, “we can hold back a little longer," he then affirmed with a nod, even if he was as unconvinced as his partners.
Their attraction to you was growing by the day. And the little encounter with Namjoon and Yoongi clearly showed that they were finding it harder and harder to contain themselves.
None of them wanted to lose you. And they would never, ever do or say anything to hurt you. They were all convinced that if you really were an omega, you had a good reason for keeping it from them until now.  
°°°
You had no idea of the conversation going on upstairs, nor that Jungkook had heard a part of your call with Wooyoung and Yeosang. After hanging up with them, you left your room to go to the kitchen and get something to eat. Noticing that none of your Alpha friends were present in the apartment, you concluded that they had probably decided to spend the evening together. The idea pinched your heart somewhat. Of course, you couldn't blame them, they were together after all, you were just a friend to them (or so you thought). You didn't know why you felt this way. And you didn't like it. As if your life wasn't complicated enough as it was, with the sudden discovery that you were an omega that you didn't know how to handle or how to tell your best alpha friend without him thinking you'd been hiding it from him all these years. Losing him too... you didn't want to think about it. You didn't want to lose either of them.
One good news, however, was that there were currently no signs of potential heat. This gave you more time to think about how you would tell Jimin and the boys.
You didn't know when, or how they would show up, whether it would be like the first time, or not. But Wooyoung had reassured you that you'd feel the first symptoms coming on now that you were aware of your omega condition.  With a sigh, you headed into the kitchen to prepare yourself something to eat. Tomorrow would be a busy day, as you and Wooyoung had planned to train for longer than usual, as the fateful date of the demonstration and therefore of the evaluation was next week, and you needed to keep up your strength.
You didn't have the energy or the mood to cook yourself an elaborate meal. Simple instant noodles would do. You were just going to add some meat and eggs to the preparation, nothing more.
It wasn't long afterwards, when you were waiting for the water to boil, leaning against the kitchen counter with your cell phone in hand, that you heard the front door open.
"Oh, you're back already?" you asked, noticing Jimin, Hoseok and Jungkook. "I thought you'd had a lovers' date or something."
Your tone had been sharper and colder than you'd expected. You felt your heart and stomach twist slightly. Your three friends who'd just returned didn't seem to notice though, and so much for the better.
"Not at all, with the evaluations coming up, we don't really have time for this sort of thing anymore!" replied Hoseok with a laugh, approaching her with his hands in his pockets, "what are you making? Instant noodles, really?"
Hoseok's tone seemed accusatory.
"Noona! You're a dancer! You need to eat better than that!" Jungkook exclaimed.
You rolled your eyes, chuckling and shaking your head.
"No time or energy to make me a real thing. Would you like some too? Or have you guys already eaten? Don't say no and then steal my food as you always do!"
You heard Jimin's laughter, quickly followed by Jungkook and Hoseok.
Then, suddenly, reality hit you. It hit you as if a boxer had just punched you in the face.
Your head turned towards them, there they were, simply doing the simplest thing in the world. Talking, laughing, joking. And yet, it was as if it were the most beautiful thing, the most melodious sound you'd ever heard.
Your eyes widened, you stopped breathing for a few seconds, and you just stayed still, staring at them. Your heart was racing fast, too fast.
Oh.
Oh.
Thinking back, what you were feeling, at that very moment, why your heart was beating so fast when you were with one of them, when you were with Jimin, since high school. This desire to always be with one of them, this feeling of security, of well-being, of safety you felt in their presence. There were no doubts.
Wooyoung and Yeosang had explained it to you. At first, you hadn't really understood what he meant at the time (or you didn't want to understand it, you weren’t ready for that truth), but now everything seemed clear.
As if the fog in your heart and mind had finally cleared.
The attraction of an omega to an alpha, of an alpha to an omega, only worked if the feelings were there too.
It was simple, and logical. You felt a bit foolish.
You couldn't help but let out a nervous laugh, drawing the attention of the three boys.
"Noona? Is everything all right?" Jimin asked, clearly worried.
You looked up at him and noticed with surprise that the water had probably been boiling for many minutes.
Jimin was standing not far from you, his beautiful brown eyes staring back at you. This simple eye contact between you had been enough to make your heart rate quicken again.
"Uh I... yeah, yeah everything's fine...!"
You turned to pick up the packets of instant noodles, noticing without much surprise that Jungkook had added two more.
Your intonation wasn't as confident as you'd hoped. You saw Jimin's gaze become more serious. He took a step towards you, making you take a step back.
You could feel his singular, distinctive scent invading you, as it had since the first day, you'd met in the high school dance club.
How could you not have noticed it before? How could you not have realized?
You were in love with your best friend.
You were in love with your best friend, and his companions, your friends.
Well, technically you'd realized it a few hours earlier when you called Wooyoung and Yeosang. But now, now that you were face to face with the people involved... now that you were confronted with the undeniable truth... things were different, totally different.
Your gestures were suddenly clumsier. You couldn't hide the fact that you were troubled for some reasons unknown to him.
To your relief, Hoseok and Jungkook were in the living room, seemingly focused on some program playing on the TV. But Jimin was still there, scanning you completely.
He was the one who'd known you best, for the longest time. He knew something was wrong, without really knowing exactly what.
How to tell him that in the space of a few weeks, you'd learned you were an omega, but on top of that, you'd just realized how you felt about him and your friends?
It was a lot to take in, to accept for someone who hadn't learned to express her feelings and emotions.
You had to calm down, not panic, not worry Jimin.
As for the last point, it was already a bit of a failure.
"Noona, please, talk to me..." he murmured, his hands resting delicately on your shoulders.
You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself, resting your hands on his. They were so soft, you couldn't help but squeeze them, wanting to hold them longer.
You never wanted to let them go.
"I'm fine, just a little... stressed and tired, it'll get better after the evaluations, I promise."
Jimin didn't seem convinced, and you could read it on his face. You smiled at him and took him into your arms for a long hug, holding him tightly against you.
He seemed surprised at first, but eventually returned your embrace, his arms wrapping around your waist and his head resting against your shoulder.
You made a decision. In truth, you'd made up your mind after your call with Wooyoung and Yeosang, but now you were sure and certain you wanted to do it.
After your evaluations, in less than two weeks, you'd confess everything to the boys.
... well, maybe not about your feelings for them. Not just yet, and maybe you never will. Never could your feelings be returned.
But you owed them the truth that you were an omega. You had an unspeakable fear of reliving the rejection you experienced with your family, but lying to your best friend, to your friends was worse than anything.
As you felt his warmth, his scent takes possession of your being, your body had relaxed.
"I'll always be with you Y/n, no matter what," Jimin murmured, his embrace around you tightening, and you couldn't contain the shiver as his breath brushed up against your skin, "you and me against the whole world, remember?"
He lifted his head, and you stared at him a few seconds before letting out a laugh. You hadn't heard those words since high school.
"Hey lovebirds, you're cute and all huh, but we're starving!”
"We're not lovebirds!" Jimin and you exclaimed at the same time, causing Jungkook and Hoseok, the one who spoke, to burst into hilarity.
You stepped back from Jimin and turned your back to him while he bickered with his two partners, mostly to hide your face and your blushes from them. You took the packets of noodles, the pre-cut meat, and the eggs. You put everything in the boiling water pan, taking long, slow breaths, trying to calm the pounding of your heart.
Damn it. Those guys will really be the death of you.
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marciaillust · 2 months
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How long does it take for you to finish drawing?
I'm an artist (beginner) and i unconsciously set unrealistic goals for myself and need a reminder of how long it takes to complete a drawing, Thanks.
Hi! In the context you presented it in, that is a really interesting question, so I'll try to approach it thoroughly. I hope I won't make you roll your eyes too much.
Where to start, where to start... I guess the first thing I should say is that there is a difference between time I spend preforming the action of <drawing>, and the time I spent <working> on a particular piece. The first would be counted in hours, the second one - days. I'm a big believer in slowing things down, and giving things time - going through options, gathering research and references, taking breaks every 1h of sitting and drawing - and seeing things through until I achieve the goal I set at the beginning of the process.
The goals are usually different each time: "quick design", "character exploration", "analysis of an artist's linework and experimenting with the knowledge gained", "creating an aesthetically pleasing image", and so on and so forth. Of course I don't write these down like it's a school assignment, but knowing in the back of my head what I'm actually doing helps me manage my expectations. I also enjoy being conscious of why I create - when I was younger regardless of what I was doing I had the thought "AND IT MUST LOOK GOOD AND PRESENTABLE! BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL LOOK!" ...and I think that obsession is the cancer of creative process.
Since the goals for each picture are different, the time I'll spent on achieving each one will be different as well, because the "satisfactory results" lay in different places. For example, the Marcile sketchpage was created in one afternoon, and took approximately 3 hours. The goal was to play around with a brush that has no opacity forcing my lines to be more decisive. I did that and so it is "finished". There's nothing else I want from it.
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On the other hand, the cover of Asterism took about 10 days to create, the goal of which was to make "an aesthetically pleasing cover picture taking colour inspiration from the works of (specific list of artists)". I took my time designing it so that it looks aesthetically pleasing, made sure the anatomy is "correct" (a nebulous statement when it comes to stylised humans), took my time masking, and picking colours, and shading. I wanted it to "look good" to my own eyes so if something was not working I would go back, change it, alter it, move it around... that's the wonderful thing about personal art, you can take as long as you like making something satisfactory.
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The funny thing is, with what the Asterism cover actually is (a cellshaded image), it could have been done probably in 4 days by the me 4 years ago. But that person was willing to sit 8-10 hours a day to draw with no breaks, she had little social life, and treated herself as a little circus seal performing tricks so that people clap around her, and the clapping was soooo nice because it meant that people remembered her and she mattered. And it worked for her! For long 10 years! Until her arm gave out, and the reality of never being able to draw again became more tangible than ever, and it's been following her like a fog ever since for the past 4 years. The me today works about 4 hours a day and every hour I take about a 30 minute break. I also don't post half the stuff I draw. There is also another aspect that dictates the speed of creating and that is familiarity with the subject matter. The less you know something, the fast you'll draw it! But as you get to know the intricacies of the process, and see all the building blocks, it will start taking *longer* because you will start accounting for every block. But then you'll eventually get familiar with the blocks and so the time spent on a picture will go down again! The cool yet overwhelming thing about art is that, there are always hundreds of building blocks. Form, composition, ambient occlusion, saturation, hue, light balance, line form...... and those are just the *some* of the generalised *categories*. And each category will have it's own subsection of building blocks! And then those blocks will interact with each other to create completely new area of expertise! This is crazy! Marcille sketch page took me only 3 hours to create because I am already quite familiar with linework - I have drawn 3-4 comicbooks worth of linework. This also means I am familiar with believable anatomy, more or less, which got utilised in the Asterism cover - the main bulk of linework got created during a 3h livestream. So.... what's the answer.... "It's all relative" is so unsatisfactory and probably not what you looked for. But you can draw something in 3 days and kill your body over it. Or you can become an expert in a field and dish the same picture out effortlessly in 8 hours. You can also split that 8h block over multiple days bringing you back up to 3 days. You could even add a whole day of visual research which might make your picture only marginally better. And even if we calculate it in terms of raw working time, pen-to-paper, like a self-inflicted capitalist tumor, that time can fluctuate still due to personal visual library and knowledge base. If I asked Tom Fox how long it takes for him to create his sketch pages his answer would probably be downward of 30 minutes. Yet I need whole 3 hours to create something *less* anatomically correct than him. And so here we are at the end of this perhaps unnecessary essay. And all we learned is this: it depends. Dry, not nuanced tl;dr, my personal timings: single sketch - 30mins; single linework pic 1-2h; Cellshaded illust - 16h; Rendered illust: 20-25h.
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aziraphales-library · 3 months
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Heya ! I'm looking for some fics that are set post season 2. Not fixits exactly, not that I would mind fixits. But I'm looking for long canon compliant fics. Also, is there a tag for such fics ?
We have #good omens s2 and #canon compliant tags. On ao3 you'll want to use the tags "Post-Season/Series 02" and "Canon Compliant", which is what I did to find you these...
scherzo in f-sharp minor, for orchestra by astrhae (M)
It was a truth universally acknowledged that an angel in possession of no memory must be in want of a wife. No, that was the wrong book. The wrong line. Aziraphale frowned. “What,” the gentleman before him asked, “and I mean what, are you doing here?” ----------------- Or, two years after things fall apart, Aziraphale shows up at Crowley's doorstep without his memories. The easy part is getting it back, the hard part is getting them back together.
Until the Bitter End by sentientsky (T)
After learning the truth about Heaven's plans and fruitlessly trying to fix a corrupt system (and maybe also having his memory messed with a little bit in the process), Aziraphale slips back to Earth in search of Crowley.
i will make it better, if only for us by davethefish (T)
With Aziraphale in Heaven, everything that Crowley loved has left the earth. He doesn't know what to do, so he starts small. Maybe someday he'll love the earth as much as he loved Aziraphale. It's time for him to remember why he chose to stay in the first place.
Black Holes and Revelations by ArtisticRising (E)
Crowley takes a leap of faith… into the heart of a black hole. It’s the last card Crowley has to play. He can’t do this without Aziraphale… and he’s betting that Aziraphale can’t do this without him. Act I (Black Holes) ends around Chapter 6 (10 if you want the smut babes). You could leave the story off there. Up til chapter 6 you have a whole story that’s pretty much G rated. From there my thirst comes out like a sexy little demon in tight jeans and a vaguely downwards saunter. Act II (Revelations) is an attempt at season 3. Treat it as a separate work that builds off Act I. Lots of plot twists ahead/theories/speculations that I won’t spoil for you :)
The Ineffability of Gray by kitfornow (NR)
Fifteen years have passed since Aziraphale returned to Heaven, and still sometimes Crowley feels shell shocked and embarrassed and grief-stricken. And mostly, he still feels numb. Fifteen years isn’t really so long, in the grand scheme of things, and yet these have somehow been the longest years of his existence. He can almost feel time crawling by, laughing at him. But slowly, so slowly, Crowley began to try again. To try harder. To find a piece of himself that Aziraphale had not touched. To find a piece of himself that does not need changing. On his good days, he can open up. His friends come over to the flat, once in a while, and Maggie brings new records and Muriel brings burnt cookies that no-one complains about because they're so proud of them. They'll exchange stories and simply enjoy each other's company for a few hours. And sometimes, he feels almost alright. Until Crowley turns around and Aziraphale is there, standing in front of him, trying to stop the world from ending all over again.
hurry back, please bring it back home to me by Percyjacksonfan3 (T)
“Why should I?” The demon interrupts cuttingly. “You’ve made it perfectly clear where your priorities lie and anything I say won’t make a bit of difference.” “That’s not true at all.” Aziraphale replies after a long hurt moment. “And you know it. Besides, you’re being stubborn. You’ll help me eventually.” Rage flashes over Crowley’s face. “You think so, do you?” Aziraphale juts his chin up stubbornly, ignoring the unpleasant feelings Crowley’s expression stirs in him. “Yes.” Aziraphale needs Crowley's help in saving humanity from the Second Coming and despite what happened between them he's determined to get it. After all, it's not only that he needs Crowley, but his plan also includes their car. As for the other matters between the two of them... well there's no reason those can't be sorted out along the way as well, is there? Or, a possible take on Series 3 that includes the Bentley, a resurrected Jesus Christ set on bringing about the End of Days, and an angel and a demon who are stupidly in love with each other but are both suffering from a lack of experience on how to actually deal with said emotions. Emphasis on the stupidly.
- Mod D
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spotty-bee · 5 months
Text
I watched the three Troll Movies the last few days and got inspired to make an Au! I was like, what would happen if a troll didn't turn grey all the way? What if they had lost hope, but not all of it? So I thought drew some fun designs and here they are!
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Basically King Peppi was separated from Poppy's group and ended up with Viva's, causing poppy to think her dad is dead and is more frightened of the Burgens because of it. She starts to get grey marks on her body, but thanks to her still somewhat happy, bubbly personality, she doesn't go fully grey. The group has leadership issues since Peppi is gone, with a lot of infighting about what they should do and where they should go. Rebuilding society is a lot harder on the group, which is why it's so easy for kids like Poppy to get lost in the shuffle, nobody to really, fully take care of them.
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Branch, still grey after the loss of his grandma and abandoned by his brothers, is there for Poppy when the adults are busy fighting or Poppy's friends have to go home. The two have a lot more in common in this Au, both fearing Bergans and their possibly return. So Branch gets her to help build his bunker with him, as well as explain his backstory to her far earlier than the movies.
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Eventually the Burgans DO find them as the adults make too much noise both partying and fighting over what to do. Poppy and Branch are the only ones to realize and Poppy manages to convince her friends and a few others to hide in the bunker with them. More Trolls are lost to the Bergans but Poppy is fully recognized as leader by the ones she's saved. Branch and Poppy both agree to abandon their current location, going deeper into the woods where the foliage is so thick no Bergan can enter. Though there are a lot of dangerous wild animals and very little light. The entire town starts living in bunkers interconnected by tunnels. Rarely singing or dancing. They remain pretty undisturbed until the events of either the second or third movie... depending on weather Poppy got the pop string or if Peppi took it with him.
Other than that, Viva and Clay are the ones who carry out the events of the first movie. (Its not quiet the same, Creek is with Poppy's group and still a coward that gets kicked out, but he doesn't effect Viva and Clay's story.) For the second I'm leaning toward Peppi taking the string with him (but that can be changed), so Barb attacks the Putt Putt Trolls instead. However Viva and Clay also handle that, and Viva manages to steal Barb's heart in the process. (I'm not sure if Barb is the same age as Poppy or not, but in my Au she's between Poppy and Viva in age, so its fine.)
So right now its not until the time around the third movie that Branch and Poppy make contact with their siblings. Branch is more cold and doesn't talk much outside of to Poppy. Poppy is more withdraw, reserved and nervous. Both have continually greyed under the stress of taking care of their people, fighting off predators, getting supplies and hiding from Bergans. However Poppy's hope for her people has kept her going and Branch's belief in Poppy keeps him going.
Branch and Poppy also get together sooner than the movies, as they knew each other longer. (Poppy has a brief stint of dating Creek first before he betrays them and gets kicked out. ) Their relationship is good, they can talk without words and are almost always on the same page, but they also feed each other's anxieties and pessimism. Once reunited with their families and the more nitty gritty details have been sorted out (Who's the Pop Queen, ect, ect.) the two actually have to be separated for their own health, as they keep feeding each other's fear, dreaming up worse case scenarios and how to get out of them, trying to make a new bunker, hording supplies, ect. This temporary separation gives them a chance to get to know their families again.
Poppy didn't remember Viva at all in the third movie, so I don't think she'd remember her father either in this AU. So she has to build a relationship from scratch with people who already love her in Putt Putt Pop Village. Branch, meanwhile, hates being away from Poppy and hates his brothers who abandoned him. (Though deep down he really wants them back in his life.) It also doesn't help that he has essentially gone from a perpetually dark, dangerous forest to the brightly lit, busy beaches of Vacay Island, getting constant over stimulation. He's very resistant to his brother's help at first, but eventually realizes that their just trying to improve his health (Physically and mentally) and that fighting it is just hurting Poppy. (Poppy makes a turn about much easier than Branch does, reversing some of her greying. However when she and Branch get to visit during the temporary separation, Branch actually causes some of it to come back, which is when he realizes the others are right and tries to do more to get better himself.) After they do improve they're free to do as they please and reunite as an even better couple.
As for the events of the third movie with Floyd, either Viva helped the brother save Floyd by stealing him back, still inside the diamond prison, or Floyd gets taken after these events.
Anyway! Thats what I have for now! Let me know what you think and if you have any ideas or questions!
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moons-of-dewclan · 3 months
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I was curious how to get your clan really set off? I recently (LIKE EARLIER TODAY JFJSJFJ) started my own clangen blog but idk if it's worthy of Tumblr😭
How can I improve my art and improve my process? You're one of my BIGGEST inspirations ngl you're literally him (or her or they I'm so sorry I never caught your pronouns) but I was just curious on how to be better? If you wanna look, don't. It's like, rlly bad so.... save your eyes. Have a lovely nighttt <33
HELLOOOOO I'M NOT 100% SURE WHAT YOU MEAN BY SET OFF I'M SORRY :{ if you mean to get people reading it, i think it's vastly just luck also appealing to an audience by accident i posted my art online for 10 years (i started posting in 2010 as a wee ka- told you i'm an adult haahahueu) before anyone showed consistent interest and i valued those two or so commenters who occasionally had something to say about my stuff, so much LAKSNLKD. that entire decade i got between 2 and 30 favourites for every piece i posted- usually between 2 and 10- until around 2021 when a making a comic aANNND joining a wolf ARPG group exposed me to many kindred art-enjoyers that wanted to keep up with my goofy stories then for some reason, i posted Dewclan's first page on tumblr and it got way more engagement than any other piece of art i've ever posted SO LAKSDNLKDAS WE CANNOT PREDICT THESE THINGS.. at least i can't if you're looking for engagement, pLS AIM FOR ENGAGEMENT THAT FEELS MEANINGFUL over anything else IN MY OPINION, and it's just my opinion- part of being 'better' is, first and foremost, being able to enjoy your art alone. and then being excited with what you choose to share! even if you don't care about your quality of art, care about the story. if you don't care about the story, care about the process and just having fun. but you have to have fun in doing it, and do it for your own eyes primarily. like if you were alone in a room and creating only for yourself! because, until you happen to find others who like what you're liking, you are then when someone is interested and you get to share that excitement, even that ooone comment on something you care about is OOGHHH SUCH A NICE FEELIN. enter communities, comment on other artists' work, try to make friends! but make sure to remember, if you create with the hopes others will like it, without liking it yourself, you're going to be really broken down if someone doesn't like it FOR you :{ loving your own art is tough work but it's integral to your longterm relationship with drawing ON IMPROVING.. for me, nothing is more integral to improving than finding a way to practice that suits you (looking at live figures doesn't help me at all. i don't know why. it's insane), and having fun doing it. i can't grasp anatomy unless i break it down with shapes. SHAPES ARE EVERYTHING. study the shapes of what you want to draw. break em down by tracing simple shapes over your subject. see if the leg is the same length as the head from muzzle to neck and lock that info in. STUFF LIKE THAT on the technical side of things, it can be super helpful to dedicate half an hour or so to drawing a day- eventually it becomes a habit and you just default to 'oh i think i wanna draw' when you've got nothing else to do. more drawing, more improvement!
HONESTLY THO another important thing is not putting yourself down. i know it's a hard habit to break (i struggle with it outside of art myself!), but it doesn't do you any favours. the more you rag on yourself, the more it'll manifest as something that actually damages your art, AND your relationship with it. let it be fun- don't sabotage yourself! you can be critical of your work and still kind! little tip here, improving can take a while, but experimenting with styles can make an INSTANT shift in how you perceive your stuff. ALSOOO EXPERIMENT WITH DIFFERENT BRUSHES FOR SKETCHING AND LINING. I PROOMISE. PLS DO IT. IT'S LIKE A MAGIC TRICK. i cannNNNOT sketch with a hard brush. everything looks horrible. marker brush tho?? so smooth. full of character. lovely. binary brush sketches? suddenly i'm Anime. pencil brush?? i digidevolve back into baby ka who loved to crosshatch and do semi realism. airbrush??? i explode into atoms actually
i find for a lot of people, they don't need to improve or be 'better' at art, they need to learn to enjoy what they're capable of doing now, and improvement is a byproduct. from what i've seen through the years, unless you work to curb it the negative view of your art will stick with you no matter what 'skill level' you get to bc the calls' comin from inside the house, yknow what i mean 3: it can be a long process to learn to accept your art, and sometimes you just plain grow out of it over time! but in the meantime it can't hurt to make efforts to fight your d e m o n s
I'M SORRY I WROTE SO MUCH IK YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS ALL IT ISN'T JUST TO YOU, ODESSY-CLAN BLOG RUNNER, IT'S AIMED AT ANYONE WITH ARTSY SELF DOUBTS. i hope i phrased everything kindly bc i meant it all kindly 3: i hate to see an artist doubt their work, but THERE IS NO SHAME IN IT. i want to encourage loving it regardless of any flaws tho, even though it takes time!
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rustingcat · 8 months
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Lena felt awful. She must've fallen asleep in an awkward position on a chair in one of the main labs. Looking at the clock she found she had dozed off for at least a couple of hours. She let out a groan as she got up and stretched, releasing at least some of the tension in her back. Lena just knew her back was gonna bother her for the rest of the day, week possibly.
Looking around the room, she saw the rest of her team asleep on nearby chairs, or just straight out on the floor. The crisis was averted at the very least, their new lasting energy source did not, in fact, blow up the building, so she'd count it as a win. Despite the massive setback, they might just pull it off, eventually that is. For now she was just glad that everyone was safe. Everyone including– 
The embryo! She was clearly not fully woken up if she managed to forget that. Lena grabbed herself a cup of coffee from the nearby machine and headed up to her private lab. She got no messages from Kara, so she hoped that everything went alright. 
She felt awful leaving her to do everything by herself, especially with such an important milestone. It was also somewhat disappointing she wasn't there to share the moment with Kara. Lena remembered her being overly enthusiastic about it in one of her visits. Or was it strange? She couldn't recall, then again she was very distracted at the time.
Lena nearly finished her coffee by the time she reached the lab. Disposing the cup on a nearby table, she spared a warm look at the sleeping form of Kara who was draped stiffly on the little couch in the corner, the couch she herself insisted on adding to the room, before heading to the machine to check the progress. The screen seemed to be okay, not indicating any warning signs at the very least, but it was the pods that caught her attention. Brainy's special pod was lit right there at the bottom in a special container, but instead of the one other pod she expected to be lit right above it, she spotted two.
She hurried back to the monitor to check the data, only to discover her own genetic data attached to the embryo in the first pod. 
Her and Kara's.
Lena's hand instinctively went to cover her mouth in shock. She had noticed Kara never deleted their PF, of course, but she never imagined she would do anything like that. Especially without her permission, or some discussion at the very least. 
Lena thought the reason she left it might be to commemorate their success, a memory from their first test. Did she have some sort of secret plan this entire time? No, it's Kara. Kara would never pull anything like that. Then again, the pod was still active. It was processed before the pod containing Nia and Brainy's data was activated, meaning she must've noticed it, at some point, yet it was still active. 
Lena had too many emotions running through her to even begin to process them. She was tired, hungry and very confused. Above all else, she wanted answers. Maybe then she could start to unravel the mess of feelings inside her.
She walked with determination towards her sleeping friend, growing more impatient with each step. 
"Kara! Explain! Now!" She demanded, her voice may have come out a bit louder than she expected.
"Mmhhh?" Kara mumbled with a confused half lidded look, she studied Lena’s face with a growing smile. Lena raised a sharp eyebrow, hoping she would wake up sooner rather than later. 
Kara blinked a few times, until her happy goofy smile turned into the shock of a deer caught in the headlights, that quickly turned into the shame of a dog that knew they were doing something wrong.
"I'm waiting." She emphasised with a stern voice.
"Oh, yeah." Kara cleared her throat. "I can explain." She jumped to her feet, all trace of her sleep was gone.
"I sure hope so," Lena stepped back and crossed her arms.
"It was an accident." She waved her hands down, a common signal for people asking to calm down, Lena only straightened her back in response.
"An accident that is still very much growing in a pod!" Lena pointed out.
"I…Yes," she recoiled back from Lena's intense gaze. "I was just… thinking…" 
"For your sake, I really hope you did." Lena swore that unlike her brother, she never bore any murderous intentions towards any Kryptonian. That is until that moment at least, where she seriously started to consider it.
"Right, well," kara swallowed hard. "We can always choose to… um terminate –  the project I mean, of course. That is still very much an option if you want. I just… I remembered the conversation we had about the future and you said that you wanted kids, but were afraid to raise them unless it was with someone you trust. And you know I always wanted kids and don't really have the best luck with my relationships," she chuckled. "So, I just figured, maybe it's a sign, you know? Well, not a sign, more like an opportunity." She finished with a nervous smile.
Lena's mouth opened and closed a few times, unsure how to respond. God, she really believed entering the lab would help clear out her swirls of emotions, how wrong she was. Her best friend was potentially offering her everything she had ever wanted, or at least most of it, and Lena wasn't sure if it made her anger lessen or not.
"Because," Kara nervously continued when she noticed Lena wasn't responding. "It's really hard to know who you can trust, you know, all those stories of people leaving, and just not working out. You and I have been through so much, so I just know that we can survive anything. I trust you with everything. So why not this? I think everyone should just have a child with their best friend! It would probably lead to less relationship troubles and such. Does it sound crazy? Because I'm not sure anymore." She let out a nervous chuckle. "Please say something, Lena. Anything, please." Kara finished her speech full of hand motions and rambling with a pleading look, directed straight at Lena.
The air felt too thick to breathe normally. It did sound crazy. More than crazy. But somehow almost made sense at the same time? Or was it just her wishful thinking? Lena wasn't sure.
"I…" she started, unsure what to say. Her anger from before disappeared completely. "I don't know."
"Lena," Kara moved closer, holding her arms on each side, "I've tried to picture my future several times in my life, never sure of what it would hold or how it may look like, but I realised that the only thing I'm completely sure about is you. I know that I want you to be a big part of my future and the thought of raising a child with you brings me nothing but joy. It's a future I want. It's the clearest future I've seen in a while, and it's so bright, Lena. So bright. Do you see it?"
She did. Oh, she could see everything. Years of denying herself from accessing those kinds of thoughts washed over her. She saw chubby cheeks and deep blue eyes staring at her with wonder and love, family vacations, late nights at home watching movies, their child starting school for the first time, helping them with their homework, Kara bringing them all some takeaway after burning out her latest cooking attempt, and maybe even…
"You don't have to decide now of course we can always–"
"Okay." Lena found herself breathing out. Not louder than a whisper.
"Okay?"
"Okay."
"So...?" Kara asked just as quietly, stepping further into Lena's space.
"Yes." Answered, bridging the gap by putting her forward against Kara's. She closed her eyes in disbelief. "We're gonna be parents." A small chuckle of disbelief escaped her lips.
Lena has done some crazy shit in her life. She went on an insane treasure hunt in the jungle to find a necklace because mother told her about it when she was too small to remember, she tried to rescue her family's company after her brother destroyed its reputation for going genocidal, tried to brainwash the entire world in an attempt to stop violence, survived multiple assassination attempts, risked her own life several times, jumped off a cliff with only hope. Hope that the person in front of her would catch her. She hoped she always would.
Lena felt Kara's thumb wiping away the tears she didn't notice were falling down her face. She opened her eyes and saw similarly teary eyes, filled with love and hope. God she wanted to kiss her. She wanted to kiss her so badly, but feared the rejection she might shatter the dream she somehow found herself in.
She hugged her instead, pulling her as close as she could, searching for proof she was awake, that it was real. Kara didn't pull away so neither did Lena. She let herself breath the sweet scent of Kara's natural perfume, how this woman always smelled so good was beyond her. 
"Wanna see our future baby?" Kara whispered in her ear after a while.
"It's barely an embryo at this point," Lena chuckled, not yet ready to pull back.
"Come on." Kara took her hand and pulled her towards the pods. They stayed close, as they stood next to the pod wall. Kara took her other hand as well and lifted it over to their pod. The glass was warm to the touch, which was unsurprising considering everything that went on inside of it. Still, knowing what could potentially come of it, was a lot.
"God," Lena wiped away her tears, "we have so much to discuss." Lena noted.
"Yes, we do. But we can do it later." Kara agreed.
"Kara, I don't even know if you even want to raise the child here." She found it somewhat difficult to say Our child. "I mean, you might want to go to Argo with your parents, and their advanced technology and education. It was your home after all." Lena tried to hold on to a sob.
"I may have been born on Krypton, but I made my family on Earth."
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