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#boring art lately i’ve been feeling well how do you say. Bad
starzonez · 6 months
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i really like that meme thing
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jamisonwritestf2trash · 3 months
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HEAVY TF2 TUMMY ‼️‼️‼️
Hello! Hi! I am very excited to receive this ask! I'm no artist, but I hope you'll accept this instead of art :)
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Medic was a strange man, Heavy thought to himself. He was the only man that would make him stand in front of a mirror, showing exactly where he’d be placing each cut in his next surgery. He never understood why Medic felt the need to do this. Maybe he just wanted to make sure Heavy understood, maybe it was just fun for him. But one thing that Heavy understood is that he had started to feel…uncomfortable in moments like these. His chest was exposed, but more importantly, to him, his stomach was. He had never been one to be self conscious, at least, he couldn’t remember it ever being a problem. But something in his brain had changed, something gave him a sinking feeling whenever his stomach had to be exposed, he wished he knew what had changed, how to get rid of this feeling, this ever growing internal anxiety building inside of him, even the feelings of discomfort that filled him as he stood there. What was there to be scared of, really? He couldn’t answer that. He just knew he wasn’t happy with the sight in front of him. It was-
“Heavy? Are you even listening to me?” Medic’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts quickly. He saw the doctor's disappointed gaze fall on him. He hated disappointing Medic, he did love him after all, and he truly cared that he was excited and ready to ramble off to him, but lately, his thoughts got the better of him, taking his attention away, and he felt more than a little bad about his neglect of the conversation,
“Sorry, Doktor.” He says quickly, his tone genuine. Medic’s gaze shifts from one of disappointment to one of momentary confusion,
“I’ve noticed your mind has been wandering when I try to talk about these surgeries. Have I come to bore you?” His voice remains neutral, but a slight shift in his gaze expresses worry.
“No, no, Heavy could never be bored of Doktor.” Heavy says wanting to rid Medic of the thought, the possibility of that ever happening as soon as possible. Medic only hums, trying to ponder the issue. Wondering what could have caused this sudden change, then it clicks, his eyes widened with realization, 
“Ah, I see…” he starts, “And this wouldn’t have anything to do with the way you can’t seem to look at yourself in the mirror as of late?” At first, Medic had assumed that it was a sudden bout of nerves, sure, his surgeries were painless, but no doubt his way of expressing love through them could lead to a few tense moments while he showed Heavy in great detail how he planned to cut him up this time. Medic may not have been a stupid man, but he was a dense one, but the second everything clicked, he could plan out his next moves accordingly. 
Heavy, for his part, felt seen through. There was something about the man in front of him, the man he fell in love with, that terrified him. It wasn’t the blood, guts, or general gore, but the fact that he could read him so well. He felt Medic’s presence shift from on his right side to his back, Medic’s head resting on his shoulder. 
“Tell me what is bothering you.” He said softly, in a gentler tone, a tone he rarely used, reserved for the soft moments the two shared. “Tell me, why will you not look?” He gestures at the mirror, “You are so beautiful after all,” he hums, “I just wish for you to see what I can see.” Heavy felt himself tense. He wanted to believe him. He truly did, but some mental mind block, some part of him that he came to despise told him it was all too good to be true. Heavy, however, smiled, suppressing a sigh, 
"Thank you, but Doktor does not have to say nice things just to make Heavy feel better." Medic blinked, laughing softly.
"Oh come now Heavy, I thought you would know by now I'm not one to lie." He pauses, "Especially to those I love." He smiles, "Now! You did not tell me what is bothering you! What seems to be causing you the most trouble, hm?" He says cheerfully, moving slightly away from him. Heavy doesn't know what to say, he could tell the truth, but it was like his mind wouldn't allow his mouth to move.
"I see, too nervous to speak about this?" Medic asks, "I am sure we can figure it out with out any words. I am good at reading people, no?" He smiles as he gets closer to Heavy. "Is it your arms?" He asks watching for a response, an indicator, anything. He continues. Prompting for any part of his torso, until... "Oh, do not tell me it is your stomach you are worried about." He says softly. He sees Heavy's eyes flick away from the slight in the mirror, feels him tense slightly, he's got him.  "Meine Liebe..." he says, his words softer than ever, he leans close to Heavy, "This," he starts, putting his hands on his stomach softly "is beautiful." He continues, touching it softly. "You are beautiful." He kisses his cheek. "I do love you, truly," he smiles softly, "all of you."  He continues as he rubs his stomach softly. Heavy feels his body relax, and his mind be put at ease. He turns slightly to Medic, smiling, he's happy, so, so happy. 
"Thank you, Doktor." He says, reaching a hand to hold Medic's. "Thank you." Medic smiles, making his way in front of Heavy. 
"I love you, Misha." He says as he smiles,
"I love you too, Ludwig." Heavy replies, kissing him softly. And in that moment, things were perfect, and he was loved, and he felt beautiful.
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I'm glad I finally pushed myself to write this because I definitely had fun doing it. I hope you liked it! Happy birthday by the way, I hope this is a good present :D
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booksandwords · 11 months
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The Wicked + The Divine: Okay by Kieron Gillen. Art by Jamie McKelvie. Coloured by Matt Wilson. Lettering by Clayton Cowles.
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Series: The Wicked + The Divine, #9 Read time: 1 Day Rating: 4/5
The quote: "Oh, David. I have done many awful necessary things. But you had a choice... ...and even at this late date, all your choices were bad. I'll tell you this. I've been around a long long time. And I am oh so bored of men like you." — Ananke
This is a great and fitting ending to a series. It wraps up the storylines well and leaves the reader with a message. It does this while delivering emotional hits with no less weight than other volumes (more importantly issues) in the series. The last pages are, I think, an echo of a moment earlier in the series. Characters are all given their own moments, moments to remind the reader that they are human, also reminders that "people never really die" (Laura) and the power of love.
This whole thing starts with a series of videos about Baal's last gig. One of them is just so adorable, Tom is an everyday person we've met before that I didn't see again. He appears in The Imperial Phase: Part 1 in a discussion with Persephone. "Please! We... have a question." "Uh-huh?" "Some texts say your cult wasn't allowed to say your name We... wanted to honour that. What do you want to be addressed as?" "The Destroyer." Tom does make it clear that this is him. He's not just a Persephone fan, he's a Baal fan. And like so many of us he thinks Inanna is hot. The video itself is him doing the fan thing, opening the ticket, queueing and going to the gig. It's an inside view of the gig and maybe a sense of the betrayal that fans will feel towards the remaining gods. Just after this three of our four heads (Jon, Inanna and Lucifer) get bodies back with the help of Nergal/Cameron after visiting him in the cathedral he has built for The Morrigan. He allows them to take The Morrigan's bodies in a moment of catharsis in a way. What I did notice is that Lucifer honours The Morrigan, specifically Badb, by keeping her red hair (though in Luci's iconic style).
I can honestly say that of all the books that have made me tear up this is the one I least expected. It's not the deaths per se it's the loss of potential and the way they happen. Just to be clear warnings for suicide, murder and attempted murder.
I don't remember seeing the birth names of all the gods before. This is a tiny bit spoilerly so read on at your own peril. • Persephone — Laura Wilson • Urðr — Cassandra • Skuld & Verðandi — Meredith and Zoe (the other two thirds of The Norn) • Lucifer — Eleanor • Baal — Valentine • Inanna — Zahid • Baphomet/Nergal — Cameron • The Morrigan — Marion • Dionysus — Umar • Woden — David Blake • Mimir — Jon Blake • Amaterasu — Emily Greenway • Tara — Aruna • I can't find names for Ananke, Minerva or Sakhmet in the volumes I have available.
I made the choice to skip Volume 8 of WicDiv because it is a collection of special issues set apart from the main storyline. If I was to come back and reread the series I would read Vol. 8: Old Is the New New. But am only half invested in the series, ie invested enough to want to know how the series ends but not invested enough to spend more time with the characters. As it is I have a bit of time pressure to finish the books and get them reviewed before I have to return them.
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phantom-ellie · 2 years
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The Art of (Smashing) Crockery Chapter 22: Blackbird
Summary: Not all gay awakenings are positive, and not all reactions to rejection are healthy.
Click here for CWs/Full Chapter List
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I opened the door. I followed the lead. They said you just have to move towards the light. Say, ‘Hello. I am a gay man. My name is Stede.’
My mind wrote a letter my heart couldn’t read. A heart confused, misused, shamed, and contrite. So I opened the door. I followed the lead.
Is this how it feels to be freed? To accept who I am, what my forebears would indict? Saying, ‘Hello. I am a gay man. My name is Stede.’
Waking up gay, a gay awakening, is this what I need? Then why does my heart hurt, my chest still feel tight Since I opened the door and followed the lead?
A mirror, I practice, repeating my screed. But my expression remains the same, try as I might. ‘Hello. I am a gay man. My name is Stede.’
‘It’s too late,’ it threatens, it chokes like a weed. Self-acceptance is a resignation, a reaction born from spite. But I opened the door. I followed the lead. Hello. I am a gay man. My name is Stede.
---
Stede doesn’t respond to Ed’s text. Not through the night or the next day. The blog post is angry, sad. Ed assumes that something happened with Stede’s father, but Stede isn’t asking Ed for comfort. He doesn’t want Ed’s love, or his friendship.
Ed was an idiot. Again.
And being an idiot, he does what he’s always done and calls Izzy. His voice is already breaking as Izzy answers the phone.
“What is it, Edward?”
“I’m so stupid, Izzy. I did it.”
“Did what?”
“I kissed him.”
“Fucking hell, Ed! I told you. Why would you do that?”
“I… I love him.”
“For fuck’s sake, this happens every time. And he rejected you, didn’t he?”
Ed feels so small. He can barely get it out. “Mmhmm.”
“And I’m supposed to drop everything and comfort you ,again, is that it?”
“Come on Izzy, you’re my friend. That’s what friends are for.”
“You have no fuckin’ clue about friendship, Ed. You drop me as soon as someone shiny and new comes along, and then I have to fix it when they leave. Every time! Do you know how draining it is?”
“I… I can guess.”
“You can guess, but you don’t know. I’ve been divorced twice, Ed. What were you doing both times?”
Ed sighs. “I don’t know, what do you want me to say, Iz?”
“You were too busy doing drugs with Jack to be there for me, weren’t you?”
Ed is silent for a few seconds. “Yeah.”
“Go to a gay bar, find someone who actually likes you back, get a therapist, I don’t care what you do. But it’s time to grow up. It’s time to figure it out for yourself. I have shit going on.” Izzy hangs up.
Tough love. Ed’s mind immediately thinks of Stede’s father. Then Stede. Then hurt.
Logically he knows not to blame Izzy. Ed has always taken from Izzy. He’s never given back, not where it counts. Anonymous donations to Los Robles didn’t count for much if they were anonymous.
It’s at this moment that Ed realizes that despite all the encouragement he gave to Stede, Ed doesn’t really know what a friend does, either.
---
Mary: Did you meet with the estate lawyer?
Stede: Yes.
Mary: And?
Stede: It should be airtight. Preparing for lawsuit anyway.
Mary: You know I’m not going to ask for any of it in the divorce, Stede. The timing is just bad.
Stede: You are entitled to it and you will have it.
Stede: You deserve it. For everything.
Mary: See you tomorrow @ 11?
Stede: yeah
---
Thanksgiving. So much to be thankful for. Right?
Maybe.
He manages to make it through the dinner all right. He’s quiet, but that’s okay. It gives him a chance to listen to Alma and Louis bicker a little bit, to see the drawings they’ve done and tell him about school. He can hear about Mary’s art show, which of course was a success, and he can feel a tiny bit of gratitude as she takes care to talk around any mentions of Doug.
At one point Alma pointedly asks Stede what he’s been up to, and he’s a bit at a loss to answer her.
“Well… I’ve been thinking a lot, I suppose.”
“That sounds boring.”
Stede huffs. “I haven’t had a lot of time to think recently, Alma. Sometimes it’s nice to take a break.”
“You could take a break here with us.” Alma looks down at her food, pushing her green beans around with her fork.
Stede puts his hand on hers. “I’ll keep that in mind, sweetheart. I just need a little time to myself.”
“I thought that’s what you had work for.”
Stede shakes his head. “No, not even a little bit.”
When they finish, Stede isn’t too far in his own head yet, so he manages to clean up, do the dishes, to look around at the kitchen that he no longer considers to be his. He never considered any of this to be his, really. It’s as if he’s just been borrowing it.
He finishes up and slides on his coat, prepared to sneak out of one life that isn’t his into another life he hasn’t made yet. But Mary spots him.
“Stede… you don’t have to run away, you know? You can stay here. You can live here with us for now. Let me help you.”
Stede stops to think about this, if just for a moment. He imagines living as a ghost in his own home, too afraid to face his wife, his children. He imagines sitting on his bed, confessing everything to Mary, everything he feels. And in this imagination, they have a wonderful talk, one that solves and clarifies everything. Like it’s so easy. And Stede leaves the house, in his imagination, with new-found purpose as he reaches Ed’s apartment, knocks on the door, says those three words, and they embrace and live happily ever after.
In his imagination.
But Stede is a useless, pathetic coward. And his dreams will never come true.
So he gives a wan smile instead, tells Mary, “Okay, I’ll think about it,” and gets in his car.
Stede has always felt safest personifying inanimate objects. His hotel room has a minibar. He tells himself that’s the only friend he needs.
---
Ed: hey
Jack: hey you unblocked me
Jack: ya getting lonely big guy
Ed: what if i am
Jack: door’s always open
Ed: you really gotta lock that shit
Ed: on my way
---
Post from the blog Hear Something Weird:
Now you remind me of something I’ll never have So, blackbird don’t sing
Comments: MauritianSupremacy: Hey, we’re planning to take you out for drinks, you left the group chat. Check your texts PracticallyGayJesus: lucy told me to tell you we miss you LucyFlawless: That was not the way to deliver that message, babe
Chapter 23
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ᴀ ᴅʀᴀɢᴏɴ’ꜱ ɪɴꜱᴛɪɴᴄᴛ | ɢᴇɴꜱʜɪɴ ɪᴍᴘᴀᴄᴛ ; ᴅʀᴀɢᴏɴ!ᴢʜᴏɴɢʟɪ x ᴅᴇᴍɪ ɢᴏᴅ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ | ⚠️NSFW [19+]⚠️
Heyoooo!!! It’s been a second hasn’t it? Lololol my bad uwu;; I’ve been doing a lot drawing lately, so I’ve been focusing a lot on that instead of writing— mainly since it requires less brain power for me SKKSSKSK anywho, in celebration of crowning Zhongli in game, I’ve decided to sin—- after talking with Admin T for a bit LOLOL thus, another Femdom fic is born SKSKSK 
As always, thank you all so much for the love and support~! We really appreciate it~!
Art is from my Art Blog: @ko-ffeine​
TW: BDSM ; Chains ; Flogging ; Overstimulation ; Blindfolds ; Shackles ; Collars / Leashes ; Muzzles ; Bondage / Restraints ; Riding ; Face Sitting ; Marking ; Vibratiors ; Breath Play
》》Admin Ko
»»————- ♔ ————-««
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Decades. It had been decades since her arrival to Teyvat. Thinking back to it, (y/n) hadn’t even realized the bonds she’s made after awakening in the depths of Dragonspine. Though it was best for her to not dwell on the past. After all, she learned early on with her revival that sticking to the past only brought unwanted trouble. 
The sound of chains clattering against marble awoke her out of her thoughts as she peered back to the bundle of chains on all fours. A long scaly tail whipping back and forth impatiently as heated glowing amber orbs bore deeply into her own (e/c) ones. 
“Morax…”
A soft sigh escaped her as she made her way over to the former archon. The loose hanfu that danced along her smooth skin had the dragon keen in want. The metal cage strapped to his mouth prevented his fangs from sinking into her supple flesh. The desire to mark and claim what was rightfully his was strung up high in his head as he strained against the enchanted chains that bound his wrists together. The hefty weight of the gold collar around his throat only further added  to his inability to surge forward as the chain attached to the device around his throat only allowed him so much distance. 
“You were being so good earlier. What’s gotten you riled up?”
Though soothing in tone, (y/n)’s expression was anything but as she marveled at the way the Geo Archon was presented before her. The night before his heat had gotten a hold of him, he had given her permission to be just as rough with him to ensure her safety—- and well, she wasted no time in taking advantage of the opportunity presented to her. 
In a flurry of motions she had skillfully wrapped the archon’s body in beautiful golden ropes. Each one accentuating the toned muscle from eons of war and battles. The delicious flush of red that painted his skin as she continued to further restrain the male only set her belly a flame. 
After all, the initial restraints were only mild. It wasn’t until the late evening did she realize how intensive she had to truly restrain her lover. Enchanted chains shackled him down. A leather muzzle had initially been placed to keep him from biting her, but was quickly forgone as he had ruined that within the span 15 minutes. Thus resulting in the current metal cage that adorned his haughty features. 
The collar and leash combo? That had only occurred when she had attempted to leave for the bathroom— only to be slammed into the floor with a lustful dragon dry humping against her as he snarled and growled at the fact he wasn’t able to sink his teeth into her flesh. 
The end resulted in the intensive flogging that only further fueled both party’s lust. 
“Little one~….”
A pang of warmth hit her as she broke out of her memories from last night to meet his impatient amber orbs.
“I should’ve attached the one with the bar in between just so you wouldn’t distract me.”  
Shaking her head, she made her way over to the male, and once she was within reach his tail immediately latched onto her leg. Easily trailing up to press against her cunt as he fervently surged forward to press himself against her. Yet of course, due to the damn muzzle in his way he could only be tantalizingly a breath away from his goal. 
The pressure his cock held did little to alleviate the pain as the desire to breed into her deeply sprang forth.
A hefty growl came from him as he pushed her even more until she tumbled onto her back. The morning sun only added to the ethereal effect as he pressed himself as close to her as he could. 
“Let me fuck you, Little one…wanna breed you until you’re full of my seed…bearing my children…”
A blush dusted across her features as he continued on before he was suddenly yanked back. A choked gasp came from him as he struggled against the Dendro vines that appeared as the vineyard appendages held him still. Each intimately wrapping around him to keep him seated in a frog tie. The leash having been jerked enough to keep him still as he let out a garbled growl.
“So feisty…this is getting interesting little one…”
“I think it’s time for you to stop talking Morax. I’d rather hear the sounds you truly want to make.”  
“Oh ho? How do you plan on doing that?” 
Taunting and ever so prideful, the mighty dragon refused to back down as he strained to get as close to her as he could. Her nearing form did little to deter the desire to fuck her thoroughly. Though before he could even do much the vines came forth to hold his head still. Smaller ones easily kept his lips open as he struggled to chomp and tear the greenery away. Yet with this, he failed to notice her swiftly remove the muzzle before replacing it with a strong and sturdy ring gag. His mouth now forcibly open as drool began escaping down his chin. 
“Haaah?”
“Not so tough now huh? Like the chains, my lovely Archon, this was also enchanted~. I had the chance to put some of my former power into this device. So I’m confident that it won’t break~.”
Grinning, she watched as the funeral consultant tested the new device before grunting as a flare of his nostrils showed his displeasure in the newly placed device.
“Now that that has been settled, I do believe you should be put to use.” 
A guttural sound of confusion came from Zhongli before darkness overcame him. Leafs? He wasn’t sure. All he knew was that his sense of touch was beginning to heighten and his sense of smell was driving him over the wall as he could practically taste how wet her cunt was. 
Almost as if a learned reaction, the dragon’s tongue fervently searched for her as he reached out. His once ‘normal’ tongue now long and thick as his fangs extended ever so slightly over the metal ring of the gag. Freedom from the device was so close, yet as this occurred…
“Guh?! Haah..nnn ”
The metal shifted to accommodate the change Zhongli brought on; and as if to spite him, the device seemed to meld to form a stricter grasp around his face as a metal band formed over his nose bridge, further enforcing the fact that the device was not coming off.
“Ahhh, is, ish nah wha ah wha—ed” 
“Oh? You’ll have to use your words more clearly, love~”
Her tone only further fanned the flames of lust in his belly as he continued to obscenely drool all over the marble floors. Though his attempts at reprimanding her were stilled as he let out a muffled grunt before an animal like moan and growl tore through his throat as he finally got a taste of her juices. 
Oh how he wished to sink his claws into her supple flesh. Mark the terrain with his love bites and scent. Yet with all the restraints scattered about his body, all he could do was eagerly lap at her pussy with his tongue to the best of his abilities. 
And by the sounds she was making, he was doing quite the job. Easily, with his long tongue he teased and taunted her slick walls. All of her weak points, the secret little motions that he knew brought her immense pleasure. 
Though (y/n) couldn’t see it, she knew that her lover’s eyes had rolled up into his head. Especially when she could feel his tongue stutter as she not only buried his face into her wet cunt, but as the heel of her foot began to grind on his weeping cock. 
Muffled moans and grunts came from the man eating her pussy as he strained against the various layers of restraints she bestowed upon him. Just the very sight of him dressed in her materials had her groaning before cumming against the male’s face. 
As she stepped back, she couldn’t help but admire the state she left her lover in. Panting, drooling with a dash of her cum splattered in and an angry red cock. 
A sadistic cord snapped within her as she cupped his cheek. 
“Mmmm…you’re my good boy, aren’t you Morax?”
“..h-haaah?”
“If you can handle my game well, you can fuck me and fill me with your seed~.”
The mere mention of being able to sheath himself into her had the dragon’s tail whipping back and forth quickly as he leaned into her touch even more.
“Let’s see how well you can hold your breath. If you do well, then you win~.” 
Immediately a twitch of his cock was enough to spur her forth as she searched for the last couple of items she needed. With a grin, she easily worked a plug into the ring. Easily, the object filled the dragon’s mouth as his loud pants became muffled grunts and moans. 
Though before she decided to attach the smooth leather muzzle over his mouth and nose, she went to work with laying him on his side. The action causing a confused muffled grunt to come from the dragon before a gasp and moan came from him as he squirmed and struggled at the sudden intrusion of the vibrator up into his ass. 
“I didn’t say that it would be easy, Morax.”
A teasing lit came from her as she watched how the dragon’s hole greedily ate up the vibrator before she turned the toy on low. The reaction was immediate as  the dragon flinched from the sudden motions as mewls and lewd moans continued to leak out from his lips. 
“Ah~ You’re so cute…so weak and pliable just for me~.” 
Cooing, (y/n) gently ran her fingers along the beautiful horns adorning her lover’s head. Now that they were in full bloom and not stumps like yesterday, she had the ability to properly gaze at them. Though as she got to the base of his horns a muffled cry came from the dragon as spurts of cum splattered against her and his abdomen. 
“Ho? I didn’t realize your horns were an erogenous stimulant Morax.”
More muffled whines and growls came from the trembling dragon as he impatiently flicked his tail against the marble. In response, the Demi god pressed a kiss to his forehead before humming.
“Let’s begin our game then~.”
With a grunt and some of her former strength, she sat Zhongli up before she grabbed the leather muzzle. The smooth homeless mask glistened back at her before she placed the item over the dragon’s plugged mouth and nose. The straps behind now buckled securely as silence— save for the vibrations— filled the room. 
Smirking, she tested the waters by lightly rubbing her fingers along the tip of his cock. The motion resulting in a highly muffled moan as the dragon trembled. The flourish of his scales along his arms only further served to show how much control he had lost. 
“My, my…so sensitive. Then…let’s do this~.”
Immediately, she positioned herself over his weeping cock and in an instant sheathed his cock. The motion causing the bound dragon to writhe and buck his hips immediately up into her as his cheeks reddened with the lack of oxygen going to his brain. 
If only she could see his expression. His eyes rolled so far up his head as nothing but pleasure and pain hit him as he felt the burn of his lungs for oxygen and his voice sound so meek amidst it all. Of course that high went away as she tugged lightly at the tip of the mask. Fresh air immediately streamed in as he coughed and sputtered with pleads and moans for more as his cock twitched inside of her. 
“S-Shit…easy there baby…”
The pet name only further fueled his whines as he leaned forward into her as he pressed his face the best he could into her neck as she struggled to keep the mask away from his nose to ensure he got enough oxygen to his brain. 
“Let’s see if I make you cum first or if you make me, how about it Morax~?”
Before he could even try to answer the mask was pressed tightly over his nose again and the slow tell tale sign of their game began as he could feel her hips work their magic. Her heavy panting and groans only seemed to egg him on as he began to partake in the game. His hips meeting hers evenly as the foggy feel from the lack of oxygen began to pull at his lungs again. 
The feeling of helplessness and being an all powerful god tamed by a Demi god had his mind reeling from the pleasure of humiliation as he came hard into her. As he did so, he could feel her walls tighten around him only further over stimulating the male after his high as he struggled to keep up. 
Soon he was met with the lovely breath of air once again as the mask slipped away and he could finally smell her intoxicating scent. Sweat mixed with his musk never failed to fan at his belly as he fervently dug his face into her neck. Quickly chasing after the high, yet a gasp and muffled broken moan came from the male as he felt her move her hips once again. 
“Oh, you thought I was done baby? Not yet~. Didn’t you mention that your heats lasted a week?”
As she mentioned this he couldn’t help but feel his cock swell inside of her again, yet he couldn’t help the keen that came out of his throat at the overstimulation he was about to receive. 
“I’ll take good care of you, love. Even if it means me drilling into your dragon mind that I’m the one who is in control~.” 
Again, the slapping of skin filled the room as muffled whines came from the dragon. His claws straining against the binds as he wanted nothing more than to sink his claws into her hips to cum into her again. 
Yet no, he was at his lover’s mercy; and honestly he wouldn’t have it any other way. 
It wasn’t until she turned the vibrator on high that he came again. A large load coming from him again as he filled her full. His seed seeping deep into her as he  rubbed his cheek against her neck even more refusing to allow her to leave as he wished to keep her plugged up. Just as she did to him.
“I suppose I’ll stay like this….but only for a moment. Then we try to feed you…alright?”
Softly murmuring against his hair she couldn’t help lovingly caress his hair as she basked in the moment of calm that a momentarily tired out dragon could bring. After all, she still had to deal with this for the next 6 days. 
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supernaturalgirl20 · 2 years
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A Greater Power
Pairings: Marcus Moreno x heroics!reader
Warnings: Violence, fighting, knife fighting, blood, death, angst, fluff.
Summary: You are a heroic but don’t actually have any powers. You’re skill with knifes and martial arts has you teamed up with Marcus, and you both fall for each other. On what’s to be your last mission, you both get captured and Marcus gets seriously injured. Can you save yourself and him before it’s too late?
A/N: this is a request by the lovely @lovelypastel2532 hope you enjoy 😊
Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰
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This is all wrong!
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
What was supposed to be a simple mission, in and out, had gone terribly wrong. Some bad guys had stolen a chemical, one that if mixed incorrectly with other ingredients, could literally obliterate people. You and Marcus decided to take it, the last job before you both hang in the towel. Missy and the other children had really stepped up and now Marcus could finally retire, something he wanted you to do as well. He said he wanted to finally settle down with you maybe even start a family. You agreed.
You wish you hadn’t.
It was a trap. Looking back on it now, you don’t know how you didn’t spot it. The clues were all there. Electro had been behind it all, his hatred for Marcus beyond words and he was finally going to have his revenge.
Outnumbered and outmatched you were both captured and put in separate rooms. They tied you up and dangled you from the roof, your arms being pulled in angles they shouldn’t. Four men dressed in black, their faces covered watch you struggle against the rope but they don’t touch you. Strange you think. Why aren’t they doing anything? The quietness of the room is interrupted by a loud cry of pain. Marcus! They get louder and more frequent and you feel the blood drain from you at the sound of the man you live in pain. You needed to get out of here.
***
Marcus was tied to a chair and was surrounded by men in black. He tried desperately to get free from his restraints to no avail. Suddenly the door opens and electro marches in, a sly smirk on his face.
“Marcus Moreno, I beg you thought you had seen the last of me? I’ve been waiting for the moment for a long time. You are going to pay for what you did to me.”
“When I get out of here I’m going to kill you,” Marcus snarls at him. Electro lets out a deep sinister laugh as he clutches his stomach. “No, I don’t think you will. You see, I have an offer of sorts, your pretty women is next door. I have her tied up and men waiting to do my bidding at any given moment, all I have to do is give the order and she will wish she was dead.”
“Don’t you dare touch her,” he says struggling against the rope.
“Ah ah ah!” Electro says wiggling his finger at Marcus. “Not so fast magnet hands. Here is my offer. You can decide who lives or who dies, the choice is yours.”
“What are you on about?”
“I have the women you love and I also have your daughter. You must decide who I kill.”
Marcus’s heart almost stops as the words sink in, colour draining from his face. This can’t be happening.
“You took my wife away from me and now I will take something of yours. You have five minutes to decide.”
“No! You can’t do this..please.” Electro looks towards one of his men and nods his head. The guard speaks into a com link and says ‘do it’. The next thing Marcus can hear are your screams and it breaks him. Turning towards electro he begs him, “take me instead.”
“No! This will hurt you more.”
“Please…your wife…it was an accident..I didn’t mean to. Please just beat me, kill me. Leave them alone.”
Electro just stares at him, his eyes boring into him before he nods at the guard again and your screams stop. “Very well. I’m a generous man, I’ll accept your terms.”
***
You struggle against the rope again and you hope your plan works.
“Stop that!”
With a devilish smile you continue to work the rope, spotting of the men moving out of the corner of your eye. When he’s close enough you wrap your legs around his neck and snap his neck causing the other men to jump into action.
You were always underestimated. Your lack of powers always leading the villains into a false sense of security. What you lacked in powers you made up for in skill and combat. You were even more powerful that Marcus with your knifes and you had trained under Mr Miyagi in martial arts, something you liked to keep hidden.
Having managed to break free from the rope you proceed to kill the men in the room. Standing over the last one you hear a voice coming through on his com.
“Do it.”
Letting out a violent scream, you play the part of damsel in distress before slitting the man throat. That would by you some time. You begin to search frantically for the keys for the door but there are none. Looking up you see a crack in the vent and an idea forms in your mind.
***
“Please…” Marcus gurgles out through his blood filled mouth. “Kill me.”
Electro laughs before he sends a shock wave through Marcus. “This is much better. You will die only when I have had my fun.” Marcus was beginning to fade in and out of consciousness, his thoughts drifting to you and Missy. How he wishes he could see you again, tell you both that everything will be ok and that he loves you. His world fades to black just as he makes out a figure dropping from the roof.
***
No! No! No!
“Marcus…Marcus please wake up. Baby please..don’t leave me.” Movement catches your eye and turning you see electro pull himself towards the door. With a new found rage you grab Marcus swords and slice through him. Grabbing the phone from his pocket you call headquarters for an evacuation and to send medical before rushing back over to Marcus. Kneeling down beside him you kiss his lips and hold him before tears start to fall. “I’m so sorry baby, this is all my fault I should have known. I…”
“Y/N you need to move.” The team had arrived and were pulling you off him as the tried to put him on the gurney. You stood back, miracle guy keeping a hold of you as you watched them wheel him into the truck. When he was out of sight you completely break down, your screams of anguish echoing around the room .
“Hey it’s ok. He’s gonna be ok.”
***
After hours of surgery Marcus had finally pulled through. The doctors said he would be ok and shouldn’t have any lasting inquiries. You were so happy but it didn’t stop the feeling of guilt that had settled within you. You, Missy and Anita sat at his side day and night, waiting for him to come round. You were asleep on the chair beside his bed, your head resting on his arm and your fingers laces with his when you heard a groan. His fingers squeezed yours and you looked up at him in shock.
“Marcus you’re awake.”
“Hey baby…”
“How are you feeling?”
“Sore…but I’m alive…that’s all that matters..”
“Dad! Your awake.” Missy says excitedly as she rushes over to him. She hugs him tight but loosens up when he winches in pain.
“Sorry.”
“Hey…it’s ok..I love you. I love you both.” He says his eyes drifting towards you.
“This wouldn’t have happened if I had done my research properly. I’m sorry Marcus.”
He’s shaking his head as his grips your hand tighter in his. “Not your fault baby. He wanted me dead, he was capturing me no matter what.”
“I’m so happy your alive. I love you.”
“Ah you’re awake.” The doctor says as he enters the room. He asks Marcus a few questions before he does a quick check on him.
“You don’t have any lasting injuries, you any feel aches from time to time by it’s quite normal given what you’ve been through. We’d like to keep you here for at least a week and then if everything looks good, you can go home.”
“Thanks doc.”
He motions for you and Missy to hop on the bed with him and you both curl into his sides. Happy to be together again. A little while later, Anita arrives to find you and Missy fast asleep on the bed beside her son. He looks to her with a smile on his face. “Thanks for looking after them mom.”
“With was no trouble. I’m so happy your ok Marcus. I think it’s time you retire for good now though, I couldn’t bare to lose you.”
“I plan to.”
***
Weeks have passed and you and Marcus have fully retired from the heroics. Marcus has been spending his days him his office, doing what your not sure but your just happy he’s here. Standing at the stove you stir the meat in the pot when you hear a groan from behind you. Marcus is bent over gripping his knee.
“Hey baby are you ok,” you say as you rush over to him.
“Yeah just it aches sometimes that’s all.” He looks at you now and he can see the guilt written in your face. Gentle cupping your face in his hands, he kisses your lips softly. “Stop! This wasn’t your fault. I don’t want to see that guilty look on your face again.”
“Ok I’m sorry.”
He makes his way towards the stove and turns it off, moving the pot off the hob. “What are you doing?”
“I want to make love to my girlfriend if she let me?”
“Marcus your still in pain, I don’t want to get you.”
“I’m not in pain and besides I want to feel you, it’s been weeks.”
He laces his fingers with your and leads you to your shared room where he lays you back on the huge bed and makes love to you. It so slow and sensual and god you’ve missed the feel of him inside you. Climaxing together he rolls off you into the bed beside you pulling you into his side.
“Ten amo, mi amor.”
“I love you too.”
“I…I have something to tell you..” he says a little nervously.
“Hmm.”
“I’ve requested that Missy be removed from the heroics team.”
“What? Marcus she’s going to be so upset.”
“No she already knows, I’ve discussed it with her. I’ve bought us a house in Spain and I want to us all to move there and live a normal life. Mom included.”
“Is this really what you want?”
“Yeah it is. I just want us to be a family. Somewhere safe.”
“Ok.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I love you and Missy so much. Anita too. I’ll go whenever you go.”
He leans over you now, his eyes looking at you with such love and adoration.
“Will you marry me?”
“I’m pregnant!” You say at the same time.
You both freeze. Looking at each other with confusion on your faces.
“What?”
Marcus waits for you to speak first. “I..I’m pregnant…I found out last week.” His lips meet your in a searing kiss. “I’m gonna be a dad again?”
“Yeah. Are you happy?”
“The only thing that will make me happier is you agreeing to marry me.”
“Yes Marcus I’ll marry you.”
He grabs the small box from his bedside locker and slide the ring onto your finger. His hand moves down your bare skin and rests on you stomach. “You’ve made me the happiest man alive. I love you baby.”
“I love you too.”
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ltleflrt · 3 years
Note
Hey Carrie! You talked a little the other day about writers' tendency to start a fic too early in the story, and how you see a lot of first scenes that could have been scrapped to improve the story. My question is if you have some tips to recognize while writing that first scene that you are starting too early in the story?
Hello friend!
That's a really good question, and I'll see if I can give an answer that makes sense. I am not a professional, and I'm not educated or trained in this stuff, it's just something that I recognize from years and years and years of voracious reading. And as with all writing advice, I encourage you to take what I'm going to say with a grain of salt and remember that no writing rule is a hard rule, only a guideline.
Also, my advice is going to be pertaining fanfiction, and specifically to AUs. Obviously a published book has an editor with a razor blade going through a manuscript for you, and the problems that bother me in fanfiction crop up in AUs more than Canonverse.
Oh, and every instance of "you" is general, not specific 😜
So I think the main problem that I see is that people are starting with an Info Dump. An Info Dump is not always a bad thing, sometimes it's completely necessary, but it is NOT where you want to start your story. If it absolutely has to be done, it's better to be somewhere in the middle or near the end. When it's something that your characters need to know.
That's an important bit: Do your characters need to know this?
And related to that: Does your audience need to know this for the story to make sense?
And very important follow up: If the answers to the above questions are yes, does the character/audience need to know this RIGHT NOW?
There's a lot of information about your story that YOU need to know. Heck, my notes files are full of sooooooo much stuff that I know about the characters and plot that never reaches the final product.
So when you're reading your first chapter (I say reading, not writing, because sometimes info dumping for your own benefit is good, and then you fix it before you share the story lol), ask yourself those two questions.
So for example:
In an AU where Dean is a tattoo artist, and it's his POV. The story starts with Dean driving to work, and when he gets there he's going to find out that the empty shop next door has been purchased and is going to be a yoga studio. He meets Castiel out front, up on a ladder trying to hang a hand painted sign, and some teens go running buy and knock into the ladder and Dean has to catch Castiel from falling. (Anyone who wants to adopt this idea is welcome to it btw, I would love to read this lol)
The mistake I often see in a first chapter like this is that as Dean is walking to work, there's a whole Info Dump about why he's a tattoo artist instead of a hunter. He'll be ambling along, thinking about his nice little business, and there's info about how his mom died in a fire, and his dad was a jerk, and Dean didn't go to college because he saved his money for Sammy's college fund, and Dean's only passion was art, and Bobby Singer introduced him to a tattoo shop owner who took Dean under his wing, etc.
Question 1, does your character need to know this?: Why is Dean reflecting on his past? Does Castiel need to know this information in order to build a romance with Dean?
Question 2, does your audience need to know this?: Why does this information matter? If Dean's only reflecting on this because you want to make sure your audience knows where the timeline changed and this became an AU, then you're starting too early in your story. Dean doesn't need to know this, and honestly in a lot of cases the reader doesn't need to know this. This is information that should have been left in your notes file.
Question 3, does the character/audience need to know this NOW?: If this information is pertinent to the plot, like maybe there's some trauma there that Castiel might need to know about to develop their relationship, then you don't want to put it HERE, you want to put it in a conversation with Castiel LATER.
If I was writing this AU, I would just start with Dean sipping his coffee, he's kinda tired because reasons, he looks up to see an unusual commotion, and has to drop his coffee and sprint forward to catch Cas. If he's reflecting on anything in this scene, it's going to be whatever made him tired, or how good/bad the coffee is this morning. Since Cas is a new business owner, they can talk about the origins of Dean's business on their first date, because it'll be a relevant response to Castiel talking about the origins of his yoga studio.
And just in general, if Dean's origin story includes a lot of canon elements, like mom dying in a fire, dad being a deadbeat, Sammy being the adorable overachieving Stanford student.... try to hide that info for as long as you can so that the audience is actually curious about it by the time the info might pop up. It's the wild divergences that are more interesting earlier on.
Okay, and then I want to talk about my giant pet peeve for a starting chapter. It's a specific kind of info dump, that often includes the stuff from above, but then goes a step further.
My nemesis, The Daily Grind.
I haven't asked the authors, so I could be wrong about this, but I feel like most of the time when this type of chapter is included in a story it is because the author wants to show the reader that the character's life is boring and meaningless before the plot's inciting incident. I can absolutely see why that might be considered an important detail about the character, but keep in mind if it's boring and meaningless to the character, it's boring and meaningless to your audience.
You know how I said earlier that writing tips should never be hard and fast rules? Well this is in regards to that Show Don't Tell rule, and it's an example of TOO MUCH showing lol
It is possible to do a daily grind in an interesting way, but only if you include a Shake Up right away. And you have to look at the 3 questions a little bit differently.
So for example:
Castiel POV, and he works in an office. His daily routine is to always get up at the same time every day, he goes for his run, he grooms himself, he has his breakfast, he goes to work and talks to Kelly about how Jack's doing in kindergarten for a few minutes before going into his office. Adler comes in to be a prick, Castiel hates him for it, and then he does his reports, has lunch hiding in a corner of the lunch room so that his co-workers will leave him alone, he does more reporting, leaves an hour after his shift technically ends, goes home to a lonely apartment that maybe includes a pet who is the only being that shows him affection, has an unsatisfying dinner of leftover takeout while watching a mindless reality tv show, then he goes to bed.
Ugh.
BORING.
Which, yeah I get it, the point is that his life is boring. But now the story is too, and I've clicked the back button before I can see how exciting it's capable of getting.
Question 1, does your character need to know this?: No. He knows. Poor thing definitely already knows.
Question 2, does your audience need to know this?: Yes, but...
Question 3, does the character/audience need to know this NOW?: Yes, but new question for ya:
Optional Question 4, why does this need to be separate from your plot's inciting incident? The answer to this 4th question is usually that it doesn't.
Chapter 2 of this type of beginning usually shows the shake up of Castiel's day. My advice is to start with the shakeup, and sprinkle in the details of what you would have put into chapter 1 to show the contrast. It's far more interesting to learn how boring Castiel's day is by starting with the shake up.
So, same scenario:
Castiel's alarm doesn't go off for some reason, OH NO HIS ROUTINE IS SHAKEN UP! You're explaining his routine while also stressing him the fuck out because he has to rush, or skip something that he normally needs to do. Action! Interesting! He gets to work late, and has to miss his conversation with Kelly about Jack because she's telling him that Adler's already in his office being a prick because Castiel isn't there waiting for him like he always is. Oh shit, he's pissing off his asshole boss! Conflict! He's so flustered by the shakeups that he misses something on his report, and he gets a call from that new marketing guy Dean Winchester who asks if they can have a meeting about it when Castiel normally takes his lunch. BAM! MEET CUTE OPPORTUNITY! While Castiel is getting all flustered by how pretty Dean is while they talk about TPS reports, he can reflect on how this is both better and worse than hiding from his co-workers in the corner of the lunch room. The rest of the day after that meeting he's thinking about how weird this day is, he still goes home an hour late, he talks to his pet about his weird day when he gets home, and maybe he still eats leftover takeout, but he's not paying attention to the reality tv show because holy shit he wants to count Dean's freckles.
In this example, you're Telling the audience about Castiel's normal routine instead of Showing them. But since it's during a plot heavy chapter, it works!
Lemme see if I can TL:DR this...
As you're reading, ask yourself who needs to know this information, why do they need to know this information, and why is it important for this information to be included early instead of later?
If the answer to any of those questions boils down to "this is backstory" instead of "this kicks off the plot", then you've started too early.
I hope this helps? I'm always nervous about giving writing advice because so much of the time I have no idea what I'm doing, and I'm just feeling around in the dark. And I definitely do not ever want to hurt an author's feelings, because this hobby is so fucking hard, and we're all fragile. Even authors who welcome con-crit with open arms will have a weak point that they're unaware of that might get poked wrong and cause a crack, ya know?
I hope anyone who gets this far who might see their own works reflected in my examples understands that I have a lot of respect for their ability to put their work out into the world, and I want them to keep doing it. We're here to have fun, okay? Okay. I love y'all 💜
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arvinsescape · 3 years
Text
Too busy.
A/N: I am so sorry this took a while to get out, but here it is! I hope you all enjoy, it is based off a request that @tomhollandlol sent me and I hope you also enjoy and thanks again for your patience. I did change a couple of things but stuck to the basic concept, I hope you don’t mind 💕
Request: Angst one shot, they have 2 kids together, different scenarios, he never pays attention and does something else and is always too busy.
Warnings: Bit of swearing, mentions of sex.
W/C: 4.2K
This last six months had been the hardest she’d ever had to go through, in her entire six years of marriage to Tom, this had been the hardest. Having two kids on top of that didn’t make it any easier, she felt alone, more alone than she had in her life, she was bringing up two children, seemingly on her own. Their eldest was almost four and their youngest was nine months old and teething, which meant she cried a lot.
Tom had been there for most of their journey, he shared the work load and it made life easier but this last six months haven’t ben the case. He became busier, he had two projects going at once and whilst she would happily make allowances for his career it was becoming too much for her. She hated the assumption that things should be easy because she was a stay-at-home mum but that was far from the truth. The children were so young that they needed her constant and undivided attention.
She was struggling to give two children her undivided attention and recently she’s become run down, completely running of fumes. She lives her life in a constant state of tired, she barely does a thing for herself, hell even a shower seemed like a hard task half of the time and Tom? Well half of the time she wasn’t a hundred per cent sure exactly what it was he was doing. She wondered how he hadn’t noticed, how he hadn’t seen the tiredness she constantly displayed.
Half of the mums at school had noticed, she saw it in their looks of pity when she arrived with her son, looking run down and disheveled because she couldn’t make herself look presentable. She didn’t have the time because either her baby would need something or her four-year-old which left no time for herself in a morning.
“Tom?” She shouted as she bounced Ava on her hip.
“Yeah?” He shouted back from where ever he was in the house.
“Can I get your help please?”
“Y/N, I’m busy.”
“You’re always busy.” She muttered to herself as she gave up and tried to soothe Ava on her own whilst making Noah’s lunch.
**
“Tom, I’ve just cleaned there.” She spoke, almost in disbelief as she watched her husband place his golf clubs in the middle of the hall.
“I’ll move them in a bit.” He shrugged. “I need to read over some stuff.” He said as he wandered down the hall and into his office. She couldn’t help herself as she flipped him off on his way, thankful he couldn’t see.
**
“Tom? Is there any chance you can take Noah to school tomorrow? I need to take Ava to an appointment and I don’t wanna be late again.”
“I can’t darling, I’m busy.” He answered, eyes on his laptop.
“Tom, please? I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.” She tried and Tom looked up at her.
“Y/N/N, I am really busy right now. Just take Noah into school earlier and then you won’t be late.” He said and she looked at him in disbelief.
“Right, yeah, okay.” She huffed and left his office, shutting the door with enough force to let him know she was upset with him.
**
“Daddy! Look what I did.” Noah screamed as he made his way through the door.
“I’ll have a look in a bit my love, I’m busy at the moment.” Tom answered and their son huffed in response.
**
“Daddy!” Noah shouted as he ran into his father’s open arms. “Can we go for ice-cream?” He asked excitedly.
“Ask mummy, I have some work to do.” Tom said and Noah visibly deflated.
“She already said no, she’s too tired.” Noah mocked his mother’s voice.
“Well I expect she is tired.” Tom said, they never bad mouthed each other in front of the children. It wasn’t something either of them did.
“Why? She doesn’t work.” Noah folded his arms over his chest and Tom looked at him in a scalding manner.
“That’s not nice. Your mummy works really hard to make sure everything and everyone is okay. Don’t talk about her like that.”
“But she doesn’t do anything. She looks after us, my friends mummy works and she’s fine. Everyone at school has said it, she has nothing to be tired about, that’s what my friend’s mummy’s say.” Noah huffed, he had a bit of a temper streak. Tom’s heart plummeted, where people really shit talking his wife? To the point his son had become subject to it.
“That’s enough now Noah.” Tom said as he set his son down.
“Whatever. You’re always too busy and mummy’s always too tired. You’re both boring.” He snapped before running into his bedroom and slamming the door. This made Tom’s heart shatter, they were both trying to do the right thing. Tom really contemplated his life choices and in hind sight he wished he’d done something sooner, especially with the conversation he was about to have that evening.
**
“Tom, you are never here.” She exclaimed, a small comment having sparked an argument that had her struggling to keep her voice down.
“I’m busy. Look in a couple of months I’ll be here.” He said and she huffed folding her arms over her chest.
“You’re always busy Tom. I can’t remember the last time you put us first.”
“I’m doing this so I can take some more time off, Y/N, I don’t wanna be that guy but I earn the money, I can’t just stop working.” He snapped and she felt her anger rise in response.
“That’s bullshit,” she hissed out and he was taken aback by her tone. “You were in some of the biggest movies going a few years back. We are not struggling for money, that is some bullshit excuse for the fact that you’re not around.” She hissed, voice laced in nothing but venom.
“Look, I have a week off starting tomorrow, I don’t need to be anywhere and I won’t have any responsibilities, I can help.” He offered and she sighed, anger leaving her with nothing but defeat.
“I hope so.” She shrugged and Tom looked at her carefully.
“What do you mean?” He asked, there was something in her tone that scared him.
“I mean,” she sighed. “I can’t keep doing this, I’m tired and I need more from you.” She didn’t sound angry just tired and Tom felt his heart drop.
“Meaning?” He asked tentatively.
“Meaning, I can’t carry on doing this and next time it’s going to be a very different conversation. A conversation about us that I really don’t want to have but it’s come to that.” She sighed out before turning on her heel and leaving Tom with his thoughts. His heart shattered, had he really been so neglectful?
Tom was free for a week, which helped slightly because their son was always itching to spend time with his father. She thought this would mean that she got a little respite after their conversation the previous night but that’s not how it panned out.
“Y/N?” Her husbands voice echoed through the halls and she couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his tone. She shouted back her location within the house and few seconds later he appeared. “I need you to look after Noah.” He said, their son hot on his heels, she furrowed her brows.
“Why?” She couldn’t help but asked and Tom gave her a sympathetic look.
“I need to get some of this work done and as much as I love him he’s distracting me.” Tom spoke and she couldn’t help but huff, it was always something.
“I thought you were off this week?” She couldn’t help but ask, tone clipped and she instantly regretted using it in front of Noah.
“I was but then my agent emailed this morning and I now have a load of work to do.” He said, there was a sadness laced in his tone but she didn’t care. She passed him feeling bad about it, she needed him to put them first and recently he hasn’t.
“Fine, whatever.” She grumbled out a response and Tom felt awful, he could see how tired she was, he wouldn’t deny that. But these two projects were taking over and he felt just as tired trying to keep up. To anyone else looking in they would have said the couple needed to sit down and have a chat but of course relationships are more complex than that and the couple were still waiting to have said chat.
“Baby, I’m sorry.” Tom spoke and she sighed.
“It’s whatever Tom. He has some schoolwork he should be doing anyway.” She said, tone defeated and Tom sighed before nodding and making his way back into his office. He wanted to say something but he was afraid to start an argument in front of the children, the two had agreed that their arguments would be kept private, the children didn’t need to know about them.
She spent the afternoon trying to split herself between helping Noah with his math’s work and Ava with her teething. Noah was a bright child when it came to English and Art but Math’s? He was no good at and required a lot of help. She found herself growing frustrated the more she went through the work, she felt guilty but she was so tired she couldn’t help it.
“No, Noah. I’ve shown you this now. Come on, you need to work with me.” She said and instantly regretted the words.
“Mummy, I am trying but I don’t get it.” Noah said back as Ava burst into another flood of tears. She jumped up from her seat, Noah making a noise of annoyance at her actions. She scooped Ava into her arms and rocked her, it was making no difference, the ache in the child’s gum causing ample discomfort.
“Ava come on, shh, it’s okay. Calm down.” She said as she hastily scanned the living room in search of her teething ring. Her eyes landing on the object and she hastily picked it up before handing it to her daughter. She placed the ring in her mouth and instantly her screams calmed to small cries. Once she was settled enough, Y/N placed her back in her high chair and proceeded to help Noah.
She was tired by the end of the evening, her only job being left was to put Noah to bed and he just wouldn’t settle either. He wasn’t great at bed times, he was an alert child who found it hard to switch off for the day.
“Mummy, can we please have another story?” He asked and she felt herself deflate, all she wanted was to have a bath and go to bed.
“But sweetheart, I’ve already read two.” She tried to reason and Noah threw his book onto the floor which made her sigh out as she retrieved it.
“Please mummy? I’m not even tired, can’t I just play with my toys?” He asked, arms folded across his chest and she wasn’t prepared for what was to come next, signs of his temper tantrum approaching and fast.
“No sweetheart, you have school tomorrow.” She sighed out and she watched as her sons face turned into a rather sour expression.
“So? I’m not tired. How can I sleep if I’m not tired? You’re supposed to read to me.” He said and she sighed.
“Baby, mummy’s tired herself okay.” She said, she really didn’t have it in her to stay awake much longer.
“Then get daddy to read to me.” He huffed and she nodded before standing up and making her way into her husbands office, a soft knock pulling him from his work.
“Come in.” Tom’s voice spoke, eyes still trained on his emails.
“Tom? Can you read to Noah please?” She asked, hopefulness lacing her voice, her husbands eyes finding her tired ones. There was something about the way she looked tonight, the way she looked like she was struggling to keep herself stood that reality hit the man hard.
“Of course baby.” Tom said as he stood and he didn’t miss the flash of shock grace his wife’s face. He felt immensely guilty, he hadn’t been there for past six months and he could see what that was doing to her. “Have you eaten?” Tom asked and she shrugged.
“Bits but I’m not hungry.” She said as she rubbed at her red and tired eyes. Tom felt like an utter dick, he’d taken on too much and left his wife to pick up the pieces.
“You should eat.” Tom said and she shrugged.
“I just want to go to bed Tom.” She whispered out and he nodded in response before making his way over to her and kissing her forehead before pulling her into a hug.
“Then go sleep love. I’ve got Noah.” He spoke and she felt relieved, completely and utterly relieved, she didn’t even want the bath anymore, that could wait until tomorrow. She didn’t miss the excitement in her sons voice as Tom made his way into his room and she smiled before practically face planting the bed and falling asleep.
**
It was eight o clock in the morning when she woke, she felt sluggish as she grabbed for her phone and looked at the time. Heart beat picking up far too quickly for her bodies tired state.
“Shit.” She exclaimed as she rushed out of bed and into Noah’s room, only to find the bed empty. “Noah?” She shouted as she ran down the stairs, her mind was racing, she was running late. How had she slept for so many hours? And how had it gone interrupted?
“In here mummy.” Noah shouted back as she raced into the living room.
“I’m sorry, I’m up, I just need to get changed and then we can set off for school.” She rambled as ran into the kitchen to sort out his breakfast.
“Darling, slow down.” She heard Tom’s voice and she spun around to look at her husband, he had bags under his eyes and his hair was a slight mess. How could he still look so good? She wished she could look as good as he did, even tired.
“What?” She looked around the kitchen, evidence that Noah had already had his breakfast. His school bag filled with the books for the day and his packed lunch.
“I’m gonna take him in. Go and chill out.” He spoke as he pulled her into his chest and kissed the top of her head.
“Thank you.” She sighed and Tom nodded.
“I’ll take Ava and then you can get some rest if you need it, I’ll be back soon. I’ll do the shopping, should be an hour or so.” Tom spoke and her heart soared at his words.
“Did Ava sleep through?” She asked, realizing she’d not been woken up by her crying last night.
“Yeah, a few times. I slept in there, wanted you to catch up on some sleep.” He admitted and she could have cried with the happiness the revelation brought her. “We need to talk when I get home.” He spoke and she nodded. “Okay, well I’ll see you in an hour.” He said and she nodded before kissing her son good bye and making him promise to behave.
**
An hour and a half later and she’d had a relaxing bath, one that she was more than thankful and ready for. She’d even managed to have a hot cup of tea, a stark difference to the cold ones she was used to. She’d even managed to read a chapter of her new book, she still felt like she could sleep for a while but overall relaxed and content.
“Hey.” Tom said as he leant against the doorway to their bedroom. She placed her book down and looked at him.
“Hey,” she said somewhat awkwardly, she wasn’t sure how this conversation was about to go.
“I’ve just put Ava down, will probably give us a good hour or so.” He spoke and she nodded. “So,” he sighed. “We should talk.” He continued and she nodded again, words not being able to find her, she needed to know how he feeling, what he was going to say first.
“I’m sorry, I want you to know that. I’ve been so wrapped up in what I’ve been doing that I haven’t noticed what I was doing to you. I’m so used to you being the one who has everything together, who know exactly what to do that I thought you didn’t need my help as much as you do.” He started and she opened her mouth to speak but no words came out before he beat her to it.
“I know that’s not an excuse, it’s poor on my behalf and I’m sorry. You and the children, you mean everything to me. All I want in life is for you guys to get everything you want and need and I’m sorry that I’ve been the way that I have, there are no excuses.” He said and she felt her heart lift, the two could fix this, fix what has been happened. “But I need something from you.” He spoke and she furrowed her brows as she waited for him to continue.
“I need you to be honest, I need you to tell me what it’s been like to be you. I don’t want you to spare my feelings, I want you to let it all out. I’m listening now, darling, I need to know what this has done to you, how I can make it right.” He said and she nodded slightly before sitting up in bed properly, her back against the head board as she carefully played with her wedding ring. Tom sat carefully on the edge of the bed, he needed to hear what she was about to say.
“Tom, you’ve just not been here.” She started with her biggest problem. “Even when you are in the house it’s like you just expect me to do everything. You expect your clothes to be washed, dried and ironed, you expect your dinner on the table and I never used to mind. You would always say thank you but recently you haven’t and it made me wonder whether or not you just expect it of me, that it’s my job.” She started and Tom kept quiet, he wanted her to continue.
“Tom, you used to be so attentive.” She said as she reached over and took his hand in her own. “You always used to be here, know when I needed help without having to ask. I don’t mind doing all of those things for you, I really don’t but when you don’t get a thanks it feels a little like you’re being used.” She continued and his heart shattered, he would never intentionally use her, he loved her, loved his family.
“That brings me onto the kids, Tom they need so much attention. They want me to split myself in two half of the time and I can’t, it’s impossible. They both need so much from me and given Ava teething I don’t even get a full night’s sleep. I am constantly trying to run off energy that I just don’t have. It wasn’t so bad when Noah was a baby, we took shifts, you helped. Recently though Tom, it’s been me that gets up and tends to her, me that sacrifices sleep.”
“I know that might sound selfish but when you have a partner, a husband who’s supposed to help with all that it gets tiresome. I found myself getting so angry with you, I wanted to be you, I wanted to bury my head in paperwork and think of nothing else. There were days when I honestly wanted nothing to do with you, I didn’t want to be around you because everything little thing you did angered me.”
“I’ve been so tired, my mind is never where it should be. I’m always doing stupid things because I’m so tired. I never feel like I get anything back from you. I’m too tired to have an evening to myself when they have gone to sleep, I just want to sleep myself. I’m always running around after them, something you barely do anymore, sure you play with them but when was the last time you had to deal with one of Noah’s meltdowns?”
“I get that you have a lot on, I get that two projects keep you busy and if we didn’t have kids it wouldn’t affect me as much but we do and it does. I need you to be there for me Tom, I can’t keep doing this alone, I can’t.” She ended her rant and Tom felt awful, he was so angry with himself, she didn’t even sound angry anymore. She sounded like she’d accepted it and she was just tired with the situation, somehow he wishes she was screaming at him right now.
“I’m sorry princess. There are no words, no excuses for what I’ve done. I’m sorry I made you feel like that, it was never my intention. You mean the world to me, you and the kids. Things are gonna change, I promise.” Tom said, he knew now that actions spoke louder than words, it wasn’t what she wanted him to say it was what she wanted him to do.
“On top of all of that Tom, I can’t remember the last time we did anything as a couple. Most of the time I’m asleep when you get to bed, I can’t remember the last time we touched each other, it’s just draining. It all adds up.”
“I know darling. I promise things are gonna change. Why don’t you pick a film and I’ll be back in a minute?” He said and she nodded as she flicked the TV on and got herself comfortable in bed. She couldn’t remember the last time she had a day in bed. Tom returned almost ten minutes later and she wondered where he had gotten to.
“Where did you end up?” She asked as he made his way into the bedroom, two bottles of water in hand.
“Well, I grabbed these, I made sure Ava was still okay and the baby monitor is working properly and I had to send a couple of emails.” He admitted and her heart dropped, after everything she’d just said? He took in her expression as he placed the water down and jumped into bed with her. “Not like that darling, I’ve passed one of my projects onto Harrison and Harry, they’re gonna finish it up.” He said and she relaxed. “I promised things will change and they will.”
**
“Daddy!” Noah shouted as he ran to his father, who was there at the school gate to pick him up, Y/N right there next to him. It had been a while since they both picked him up. Ava was a little more settled today which made things a little easier.
“How was school?” Tom asked enthusiastically and then almost cried when he realised how long it had been since he asked that question.
“Amazing!” Noah gushed as he looked at his mother. “Mummy, you look so pretty.” He spoke and she laughed.
“She always looks pretty.” Tom defended her and Noah nodded.
“Yeah, but she looks extra pretty today.” Noah said. It had been a while since she was able to put effort into her appearance and she felt better for doing it. Even if it was only a nicely picked out outfit and tamed hair. “Can we go for ice cream?”
“You my boy have an obsession.” Tom laughed as he poked his son playfully. “But yeah, I think that’ll be a good idea.” Tom said as he looked to his wife who nodded in response. She didn’t miss the looks of jealousy thrown her way when they saw her with Tom.
“So what did you do this afternoon?” Noah asked his parents as he was being strapped into the back of the car.
“We watched a film.” Tom stated, it was an absolute lie, they’d gotten half an hour into the film before Tom had his head between his wife’s legs. It had been a while since they’d done anything like that and when they both realised that fact. When they both realised how long it had truly been since they’d done anything, they spent most of the afternoon catching up with each other’s bodies. In between tending to their baby of course, they both felt energized after their endeavors between the sheets.
“Was it good?”
“Absolutely amazing.” Y/N answered as Tom slipped into the driver’s seat, she took his hand in hers as she held it in her lap.
“Can we watch another film when we get home?” Noah asked excitedly.
“Sure, how about we go and spend the afternoon doing something fun and then we can go out for tea, go home and watch a film?” Tom suggested and Noah fist bumped the air.
“Yes! Does this mean you two aren’t going to be boring now?” Noah asked and Y/N and Tom found themselves laughing.
“Yes, this means we aren’t going to be boring anymore.”
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engie-ivy · 3 years
Text
Remus is the uptight, swotty Prefect who's always getting the popular and beloved troublemakers Black and Potter in detention. Remus doesn't care what people say of him, and he absolutely doesn't care about Black's blinding smile.
A Book By Its Cover
Remus pulls his jumper closer around himself against the draught in the large, empty halls. The corridor is dimly lit and he hears nothing but the sound of his own footsteps. Everything is quiet. Too quite.
A loud clang suddenly sounds from behind one of the tapestries. Remus almost smiles to himself. Bingo. In a swift motion, he pulls away the tapestry.
Startled, Black whirls around. He’s surrounded by what appear to be paint cans and rope. His shock only last a moment, though.
“Lupin!” He exclaims, a beaming smile appearing on his face. “What a pleasant surprise!”
Remus crosses his arms over his chest. He makes an effort to keep a firm expression on his face, to show he’s not affected by Black’s notorious, blinding smile, like everyone else is. “Only pleasant if you like detention. And as for a surprise, I am a Prefect. I am supposed to be here making my rounds. So what are you doing here?”
“Preparing a prank,” Black says simply.
Remus doesn’t know whether he should be insulted Black doesn’t seem to take his authority very seriously, or glad that he doesn’t insult his intelligence by coming up with an excuse.
“Right,” Remus says, before taking out his notebook and pen. “Out of bed after curfew and engaging in illegal activity,” he scribbles down. “And where’s Potter?”
“Aw, am I not enough for you, Lupin?” Black pouts.
“I figured you could use some company in detention,” Remus replies smoothly.
Black clicks his tongue. “So thoughtful.”
“If you’re here setting up some prank, then it’s a given Potter is setting up that prank somewhere else in the school as well. So, where is he?”
Black shakes his head. “For you’re own good, Lupin, you don’t wanna put James in detention right now. People won’t be too pleased with you if the school’s football star misses the upcoming match against Slytherin thanks to you.”
“So thoughtful,” Remus repeats Black’s words, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “But please, don’t concern yourself over me. I’ve never cared what others think of me, and I don’t plan on starting now. And you basically just admitted Potter is currently doing something that would warrant me giving him detention, so you might as well tell me where he is.”
Black sighs. “This is why people call you uptight.”
Remus’ expression hardens. “If people care so much, they should be mad at Potter for risking the football match in the first place by playing some stupid prank.”
Black gasps dramatically and clutches his chest. “Stupid? Our pranks are not stupid! They’re works of art! Jumping out of a cake on miss McGonagall’s birthday? Hilarious! Making a zip line to go from one floor to the other? Brilliant! Filling the gym with stray cats, many of whom were eventually adopted? Genius! People love our pranks. They make people laugh and bring some excitement in their lives. Much needed excitement, because let’s face it, school is boring. Sitting there, listening to old people tell you things you already know.”
“For you maybe,” Remus mutters.
Black scoffs. “Don’t pretend you’re not one of the smartest people in our class, Lupin.”
Remus just glares harder at Black, to show that no, he doesn’t care that Sirius Black, whom people are always falling over themselves for to get even a bit of his attention, has apparently noticed Remus’ academic achievements. No, he doesn’t care at all.
“Even the teachers love our pranks,” Black continues. “They put some life into this place!”
“We’ll see what miss McGonagall has to say about it when I report you tomorrow,” Remus says calmly. “I’ll go finish my rounds, and when I get back, you better have cleaned up this mess.”
As he turns around to leave, Black suddenly grabs his wrist. “Join us!”
“Wha...” Remus turns back, and his traitorous stomach flutters at how close Black is suddenly standing.
“Join us for one prank,” Black says.
Remus blinks at him. “Why in earth would I do that?”
“Because it’s fun! And honestly, Lupin, to me you always look like you can use a bit of fun.”
That catches Remus off guard. It’s true. Between struggling to get top marks, doing everything he can for extra credit, making sure he has a spotless record, excelling at his Prefect duties, and worrying about his sick mother, lately he often feels like just throwing his hands in the air and say ‘screw it all!’, and just do something crazy, something dumb or irresponsible. But he definitely never wanted for Black to notice that.
“Come on, Lupin,” Black says, as Remus stays silent. “Be part of the fun for once, instead of putting a damper on it.”
“Your childish pranks aren’t my idea of fun,” Remus bites back, feeling himself getting defensive.
Black just grins. “You won’t know that unless you join us for just one prank!”
“Why would you even want me to join you?” Many people would be lining up to be a part of one of Black and Potter’s infamous pranks. It’s beyond Remus why Black would ask that one stuffy guy who puts them in detention almost every week.
“Because I like you,” Black shrugs. “I like how hard you work for everything and how you don’t care what anyone thinks of you. And I think you secretly have a talent for it,” he adds with a wink, that absolutely does not make Remus’ knees go weak. “I bet you have a wicked side to you underneath all that swotty stuff.”
“But I’m a Prefect!” Remus argues. “I’m supposed to discipline rule-breakers, not break them myself!”
Black rolls his eyes. “You shouldn’t take that job so serious.”
This rubs Remus the wrong way. “Not everyone can afford to treat everything in life as a joke,” he says coolly.
Black folds his arms over his chest and stares. “A fancy title and a badge and suddenly you’re better than us?”
“It’s nothing like that!”
Black huffs. “Then why is that bogus job so important to you?”
“Because some of us can’t afford to have even one note on their record if they ever want to get anywhere in life!” Remus snaps. “Because some of us need perfect scores and every bit of extra credit they can get if they want universities not to immediately bin their applications! Because some of us don’t have a last name they can flaunt, a daddy who can make a phone call, a mommy who can throw some money around, and suddenly you’re top of the list! Because some of us can’t just look at their rich parents and rely on them to always give them everything they want!”
The change in Black is instant. He takes a step back, and instead of his usual easy smile and bright eyes sparkling with mischief, his face becomes an ice-cold mask. “Fuck you, Lupin,” he hisses. “You don’t know a thing about me.”
He pushes past Remus as he storms off, leaving him behind feeling very confused. Maybe he shouldn’t have said that. Yes, the system is unfair and Black is privileged, but Remus supposes that isn’t really Black’s fault. He knows Black isn’t actually a bad person. His heart is in the right place, and he’s usually kind, only ever mean to people who, quite frankly, deserve it.
Remus just wishes Black would stop with those bloody pranks.
Remus just wishes Black would continue with those bloody pranks.
Or do anything really that makes him seem more like his old self. Remus never thought he’d miss that loud, barking laugh, that infuriating smirk, those lame puns so much.
Ever since everyone returned from Christmas break, Black has completely withdrawn. He hardly talks to anyone, he just sits silently, his eyes staring off in the distance and his expression blank. Potter is always by his side, softly talking to him or just throwing him worried glances.
Since then, it has been the talk of the school, and even in the papers and on the news: Sirius Black has been removed from his parents’ custody. It was a messy affair, the police has even been involved. Black’s father was arrested on grounds of child abuse. Apparently, Orion Black, the noble and well-respected patriarch of the prestigious Black family, has a habit of beating his son. It must’ve been going on for a while, but over the break it escalated. People just can’t get over how Sirius Black’s life wasn’t as perfect as it always seemed to be.
Remus feels bad for Black, and especially feels like an idiot, having said the things he said. He knows he owes Black an apology. It has been a couple of weeks since the break ended, and the apology is beginning to be long overdue. Though he also knows that Black has probably not been waiting for an apology from the uptight twat that always gets him detention.
Maybe it’s more to ease his own consciousness that he hesitantly approaches the table where Black is sitting. Potter glares at him the moment he sees him, and half gets out of his seat, probably to tell him to piss off, and rightfully so. However, after a quick glance at Black’s face, who’s looking up at Remus, he sits back down, as if he sees something on his friend’s face that makes him chance his mind.
“Bla- Sirius,” Remus says, realising a tad late that Sirius might nor want to be reminded of his family name right now. “I’m sorry,” he blurts out. “I said some shitty things to you, and I shouldn’t have. You were right, I didn’t know anything about you.”
“It’s okay,” Sirius says softly. “You had good reason to be angry, it’s a rather fucked up system. And you didn’t know. Didn’t know that I would’ve gladly given up all that privilege to just have parents who... who love me...”
Sirius’ voice falters and he trails off. Potter is staring at him wide-eyed, and also Remus is surprised. He knows Sirius hasn’t talked about it to anyone, and he feels almost guilty he’s saying it to him of all people. He’s also surprised at the overwhelming urge he has to pull Sirius into a hug, hold him and tell him they never deserved him anyway. He has to leave before he does anything stupid.
“I should go,” Remus says quickly. “If there’s ever anything I can do...”
As he turns around to leave, Black suddenly grabs his wrist. “Join us!”
Remus turns back to look at him.
“Join us for one prank.”
“Why would you want me to join you?” Remus asks, much like the first time.
“Because I like you,” Sirius replies, much like the first time, only where he had then sounded nonchalant and slightly amused, he now sounds pleading and vulnerable.
“Yeah,” Remus says hoarsely, because his Prefect duties suddenly don’t seem so important compared to helping Sirius come back to his old self. “Yeah, I’ll join you for one prank.”
And then the most amazing thing happens: for the first time in weeks, Sirius Black smiles. It’s only a small smile, but the room already seems a bit brighter. In a moment of vivid clarity, Remus knows that there’s nothing he wouldn’t do to make that boy smile.
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netherworldpost · 2 years
Note
I just wanted to say I love how much fun you’re having with your blog and self expression. I’m going through a quarter life crisis at the moment and the people around me in my real life keep acting the second I got passed 25 my life was basically over, I’m passed my prime, and all my passions are basically dead except if I want to take up train watching or quarter collecting. I’ve even been told “it’s 1 to 25, then 26 to the grave.” Seeing you being so much older then me yet still having so much fun with weird creativity gives me so much hope for the future, that my own aspirations and projects didn’t die on the vine the second I aged passed 25. Keep on being you and thank you so much with sharing with the rest of us.
At 25, I was about halfway through grad school -- maybe a bit further, but we'll go with "still in grad school" because it helps frame everything.
The following is an incomplete, not exaggerated list of things bad and good that have happened in the intervening years. I admit it pains me to not exaggerate but in the interest of being helpful, it feels necessary:
I do reserve the right to put things out of order because otherwise I'll spend 10 hours assembling a timeline and Fang will throttle me.
I want you know, and I mean this with the entirety of my soul, if you only read this and not the list: life is long.
People talking about life ending after a certain age are trying to sell you something (a product or service or a worldview or some combination).
Or they are just fucking boring people who gave up before their number was punched. I'm not sure which is more frustrating, though I've discovered I do not have the emotional range to help, so I wish them well and move on as I have not given up.
People who say things like "your body begins falling apart at a certain age" have valid points (I can't eat like I did at 25, my legs aren't what they used to be) -- AND not BUT -- there are methods and equipment and exercises that can mitigate.
I can't eat the fried monstrosities at diners like I did at 25 but hell I enjoy the taste of food more, I've broadened my palette. I enjoy a million more foods than I used to.
Sitting at a chair for 12 hours at a time hurts my back now, so I saved up coins to get a better chair and learned stretches.
etc.
This is under a "keep reading" because even for an atty post it is... long. TW: alcohol, food
Moved across the country. Got a lot of tattoos. Solo trip to Salem, MA during a hurricane, staying at a haunted bed and breakfast, taking cemetery photos in said hurricane. Tattoo on said trip.
Meeting a client at a... we'll go with a bar. Wrong train station. See tattoo parlor. "I have a good idea for a story to tell client why I'm running late!"
Producer on 3 plays. These plays were of the barroom variety so they weren't exactly Broadway level but they were intensely enjoyable.
I've drawn approximately ten billion ghosts and monsters and robots. Started a design firm. Sold said design firm to the folks I was employing to go consulting. Stopped consulting because oh wow I was not having a good time.
Went to New York City on a whim to catch a client's attention but ended up helping him break up with his girlfriend of [I was very intoxicated because the deal was falling apart so I didn't catch the years] so he could move to China. Inadvertently spent a very long, weird, rambling night with someone who I couldn't understand because we had conflicting accents.
Professional ups (made a lot of money, made others a LOT of money). Professional downs (spent a LOT of money). Commissioned paintings of witches and ghosts and portraits on cardboard and wood and digitally and paper. Just straight up bought a lot of art.
"Babe are we sure we are straight?" self to self talk
"Babe are we sure we're a guy?" self to self talk
Hair (obviously) now fabulous. Realized the exquisite comfort of a really good, deep tissue back massage by a trained professional (life alteringly good). Took a date to Paris. Took a date to Jamaica. Took a date to a lot of places. Took myself to a lot of places. Dinner alone, movies alone, several hour walks alone.
So many jobs. To be fair I was a freelancer, so that comes with the territory.
Hired people. Fired people. Built departments from 0 people to 3+ and growing upwards as I left (ah consulting).
Took a pinup class (hair, makeup, wardrobe). Assisted launching an indie lingerie design company. Helped them grow.
Helped a lot of businesses grow.
Heartbreak. Love. Lots of both. Learning to say "no" and mean it. Learning to say "yes" and enjoy what is offered.
Fell in love with: people, reading about mushrooms, learning how Christmas tree farms work despite having no ability/desire to make a Christmas tree farm, the mechanics of folklore, the post office.
Incredibly incomplete foods I have tried (most I love): strawberries, blueberries, pumpkin pie, apple pie, cherries, pizza, salsa, chicken tikka masala, rye bread, pickles, banana bread, healthy cereal, tater tots, deviled eggs, mayonnaise, sea urchin, onion rings. Onion rings? I can't remember, that may have been early 20s. So much scotch. Just ridiculous amounts. Worth noting, very enjoyable.
Made a lot of art. So much art. Learned to write stories I wanted to see. Wrote so many stories. Launched my dream project. Closed my dream project. Came up with a new dream project.
So many shows (tv, cartoons, in person, sometimes me watching, sometimes me participating, sometimes me funding).
Experimented with photography and drawing and painting and calligraphy and sewing and woodworking and sculpture.
The list goes on because I go on.
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shyvioletcat · 3 years
Note
➼ we have never gotten along, but i’d rather bicker with you than be on this boring date right now
➼ i’m at a bar when i see someone making you uncomfortable so i swoop in as your partner…only to find out that the person you’re with is your actual partner and they broke up with you because they thought you were cheating–my bad?
➼ a friend asked me what i thought my life would look like in ten years and i realized that i pictured me and you, holding hands, with kids
➼ i keep drawing you in my sketchbook because i’ve always found you to be beautiful and i’m longing to tell you how i feel, but one day you find it and you have questions
➼ when a great one night stand turns into an awkward meeting with my new boss the following day
For Rowaelin or Feysand... dealers choice?
This was actually a super hard choice. I had a lot of ideas... I may come back to that sketching for Feysand later... I ALMOST picked that family one for Rowaelin too haha.
~~~~~
Rowan watched the bubbles rise in his beer, one after the other. He had agreed to come to the bar to watch the soccer game with his mates but when the game got washed out due to the intense lightning storm he had got bored. The conversation had turned to relationships, and in his current single state he was a little bit bitter about their happiness and potential prospects. He had none, he was busy with work and that didn’t give him much time to look for a girlfriend. Fenrys had downloaded a dating app onto his phone but Rowan had been too proud to open it despite the notification bubble in the corner. Even if he was a bit rusty, he didn’t need the internet to help him find a date, he had enough skill to do it himself.
Maybe.
With a sigh he looked around the bar for his own potential prospect. Rowan had done a near full circle when his eyes landed on Fenrys and his wide grin.
“So that app--”
Rowan didn’t give him a chance to say anything else before he was up and moving. He was halfway to the bar when he realised he had a full glass at his table. Maybe he could order some fries to soak up the booze while they waited for the soccer match to start up again. That was his plan as he made his way to the bar, but then he heard an incredulous, “Excuse me!” and that had him stopping in his tracks.
Turning, Rowan saw a stunning woman seated in a booth, her peculiarly turquoise coloured eyes glaring at a man seated across from her. The man reached out and the woman recoiled but he seemed insistent. Rowan had seen enough. He changed direction heading for the booth, sliding in next to the woman and casually putting an arm around her shoulder.
“Sorry I’m late, babe,” Rowan pressed a kiss to her hair then he addressed the brown-haired man. “I’m Rowan.”
“Aelin,” the man almost sneered. “Who is this?”
Rowan filed that little bit of information away for later.
“This is not what it looks like, Chaol,” the woman -- Aelin-- said stiltedly.
“I knew it,” Chaol said, shaking his head. “I knew you were cheating on me.”
“I--what? You thought I was cheating on you?” Aelin asked.
“I’m out of here,” the man was angry now, throwing down a few bills down on the table from his pocket. “We’re done, this is me officially breaking up with you. Have a nice night.”
The woman watched her… well Rowan wasn’t exactly sure. It seemed like that man may have been her boyfriend, and he may have read the whole situation wrong. He had assumed from the situation that man had been making unwanted advances but from the look of things he may have just interrupted a lovers tiff. When the other man was out the door Aelin pushed away from Rowan, his arm falling off her shoulder.
“What the hell was that?” she demanded.
“Uh…” Rowan rubbed the back of his neck. “I thought he was making you uncomfortable so I thought I would step in and help.” She glared at him. “So, um--my bad?”
“Is your name even Rowan?” Aelin asked him.
“It is.”
She was thoughtful for a few moments, lips pursing while she considered gods knew what. She could be thinking about taking a swing at him and it looked like it would hurt. “Well, Rowan. Seeming as you ruined my date night with my prick of an ex-boyfriend, why don’t you buy me some dinner?”
Aelin smiled at him now, relaxed and looking him over with an appreciative perusal. Rowan smiled right back, maybe he didn’t need a dating app to get a date--maybe he just needed his own stupidity.
“It would be my pleasure.”
~~~~~
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ygreczed-3 · 3 years
Note
I adore your comics but in the most recent drawings Connor looks super skinny and like too young like it makes me uncomfy 😬
As you may know already, this definitely isn't what I'm trying to convey ! I've always and will always go for a 25-30 years old Connor in my comics/stories in general.
You don't seem to be trying to be mean or to accuse me of drawing purposely an under aged Connor, so I'll try to explain why I'm drawing Connor this way. In any case, know that I'm not trying to be condescending with my explanation, and if my current art style bothers you too much, you're free to stop following me, even block me if it makes you feel safer.
I'm not here to make people uncomfortable, and I'm not here to judge what can or what cannot make you feel bad. I'm sorry my drawings made you feel that way though 😕
BUT
I've been working hard on my art style lately, and I try to tend toward something more cartoony, the kind of design you can see in a show on Netflix or something like that. I studied professionals' designs, especially from Kim Shiyoon, Randy Bishop, the art style of the Paperman, some of Disney's designs (Treasure Planet ilu), etc... I worked on simplifying my shapes, my lines, I worked on the way I draw dynamic poses, gestures. How to make Hank look like the big bear he is, how to make Connor look quick, flexible and mischievous.
The result of all my practice is that, well, my shapes and lines are simplified.
It would be the same if I was working on, let's say, a chibi art style. Chibis look like kids... but are they ? Nope, that's their style.
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The example I took is showing what changed on their faces as the style evolves, but the body follows the same logic : I'd say Connor maybe look a bit more "feminine" with the simplified artstyle (because of the exaggeration in the gesture, too).
Anyway, that's what I wanted to say : the artstyle changed. Well, you're not forced to like it, after all ! Knowing myself, I'll change it when I'll be bored of it.
But I won't change it because it makes you uncomfortable. As I said earlier, you're free to unfollow, block me or the tags I use. I won't take it personally ! Now if a design seems under-aged to you, I'd try to see if : - the character is behaving like he's under-aged - the character is infantilized by other characters
Connor in my story is an adult behaving like an adult and treated like an adult, for instance 😉 So I don't feel like I should feel guilty for drawing him the way I do. But please be careful with this kind of message because I think it can ruin one's mood at least (this is the kind of thing you really don't like to be accused of), and life at worse (haters taking this excuse to harass the artist, for example). There are really disturbing artworks picturing obviously under-aged characters doing nasty things everywhere on the internet, pointing out artists because of their artstyles sounds a bit unfair and quiet counterproductive.
So that's my conclusion : it's my artstyle and I'm not changing it !
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dawl-and-dapple · 3 years
Text
rating: general word count: 1443
Essek and Jester being sweet, based on the non-sexual intimacy prompt 'escorting the other to a doctor/ therapist appointment' given by @mllekurtz
***
Can you drive me to the dentist next week pretty please?
It’s been almost a year since Essek had first been asked to give one of his friends a lift. The requests had slowed somewhat since Caleb finally got himself his own car two months ago, but he is not yet necessarily free from this particular duty. Now he receives a text asking to be driven out of town most often when Caleb is occupied with work, sick, or inebriated.
These texts used to make him wince. After some time they made him smile. These days, they tend to catch him a little off-guard.
Is Caleb not available? he responds.
No, Jester texts back, he’s got an appointment too. Are you gonna be busy?
No, I will be available. I’ll drive you.
Thank you!! I’ll meet you outside the school like usual!! Love you so much!!!!
Essek puts away his phone. He remembers where Jester’s dentist is from the last time she had him drive there. There’s a nice café two blocks away where he could wait out her appointment, reading and enjoying a cup of tea, before driving her home again. He puts his mind to picking out which book to bring.
Five days later, when Essek arrives in the small car park across from the art college, he’s twenty minutes early. He occupies himself by methodically checking his emails, texts, then social media.
Caleb has sent him a photo of Frumpkin playing with his television’s cables. Essek asks if he’s forgotten about his therapy appointment. Caleb responds with a photo taken through a windscreen of a city road, blocked with traffic as far as the eye can see, and a text reading, I wish I had.
Someone knocks on Essek’s window.
“Hey!” Jester’s nose presses up against the glass. “You got here early,” she says, muffled. “You should have let me know.”
“I am not going to encourage you to leave class early, Jester.” He opens the passenger door.
“Boo.” Jester flops into the seat and begins buckling herself in as Essek starts the engine. “We could have hung out a little! We’ve all been so busy since the summer and I miss you, you know. I wanna know how you’ve been! Do you wanna talk about work? Probably not. How about, um, how’s the new flat? I heard Caduceus helped you settle in.”
“I have been well,” Essek says as he pulls out of the car park. “You remember that miniature flower bed you helped me build on my windowsill? I have been growing a little basil plant there.”
“Oh! Have you used the leaves to make anything?”
Essek winces. Of the scant few recipes he could reliably prepare, most are from his home. He’d failed to find a Xhorhasian supermarket in the area after moving and had taken it as a strong sign to try working with what he’d been given. But his lack of experience cooking anything at all made adapting that much harder.
“The cooking part...I am working on that. I will be asking for Caduceus’ guidance again.”
“I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it,” Jester says airily while digging through the small collection of audiobooks and music discs in the door compartment. “How long have you had these? Caleb’s car doesn't even have a CD player. Oh, I bet Caleb could help!” She grins at his reflection in the internal mirror. “He can make some very tasty Zemnian meals, you know.”
“I do know. I believe I’ve eaten one or two prepared by him at a dinner party with the others.”
“You should ask him to teach you the recipes.”
“I might. What did you get up to today? Painting? Sculpting?”
Jester smirks. She answers him, goes on to talk about her current project (a ten-foot-tall collage of hundreds of vintage pinup photographs, though Essek cannot parse the meaning of it). Essek gets the distinct impression that she’s barely holding herself back from needling him more.
As they reach the edge of the city, the traffic slows. A heavy sense of doom overcomes Essek, while Jester flips through the radio channels.
Someone behind Essek honks. He grits his teeth.
“Oh, the traffic here is pretty bad, huh.”
Essek flexes his hands around the steering wheel. “Yes, it seems so.”
Jester turns the radio off. “Do you have to be anywhere after this?”
“No,” he replies. The car comes to a dead halt. “I do not.”
Jester bounces in her seat as if she might be able to peer over the roofs of the dozens of gridlocked cars ahead of them. “Oh man,” she says. “I’d get there faster if I walked.” She goes quiet. After a heartbeat she smiles and turns towards Essek. “Hey Essek? Do you have any sexy audiobooks?”
“What?”
“Like, do you have a CD in here of someone reading a porn book out loud.”
“No, why would I have–?”
“That’s okay, I can plug my phone into the dashboard.”
“Please, Jester.”
“Okay!” She laughs, tucking her phone back into her jacket pocket. “What CDs do you have? All the titles are in Undercommon...”
“Most are audio documentaries. There are two about special relativity, one about magnetism, and one on the life of a particular astrophysicist. There’s also a rock album in there somewhere; my brother gave it to me as a joke.”
Jester snorts.
“I am very boring, aren't I?”
“No!” Jester suddenly grabs his shoulder and shoves him around in his seat, which would have worried him were they moving at any velocity at all. “You’re not! Essek, you’re very fun and interesting.”
Essek smiles as he’s shaken from side to side, keeping his eyes on the traffic jam ahead. “I am very fun and interesting,” he repeats.
She finally stops shoving at his shoulder. “I should get you some new fun CDs for your car. I don’t even know where to buy CDs these days, but I'll get you some.”
“Can you promise there will be no more than one pornographic item in this collection?” he asks, raising his brow at Jester in the mirror.
“Oh, sure.”
“Then, as they say, go wild.”
“Neat. Hey! I know we’ve all been super busy lately but I bet we can do, like, a dinner party or something. Just one evening. Yasha got back into town this week and Veth says Luc has been spending most weekends at his friends’ houses so she can come over. Maybe a Saturday night?” She’s pulled out her phone already. “We can just hang out in my and Fjord’s flat for a while. Or yours!”
“I do not think I have enough space for nine.”
“But would you be free?”
He thinks. “Next weekend, yes.”
Jester pumps her fist in the air. “Awesome! I’ll text the others.”
The traffic moves ever so slightly. Essek watches the cars ahead of him like a cat watching a bird.
“Beau might be the busiest but I bet she’ll want to come. Oh, Caleb can cook something with Caduceus! One of those meals you liked.”
“Uh, maybe.”
“Maybe you can show him a recipe you know too. Try that sometime.”
“Hm.” The car in front finally budges. Essek inches forward.
“I bet he’d love that, Essek.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I know you don't think you’re a good cook, but I remember that rice meal you made when I came over last spring and it was good!”
Now they’re driving again, if at no more than five mph. Essek grips the wheel.
“Make that meal, put on a good movie, wear something cute — that black top with the long sleeves I think — and it’ll be smooth sailing. Trust me, Fjord was no match for the tried and true Lavorre Technique.”
“Hm.”
“And then maybe you can finally talk to him about your big fat crush on Cay-leb.”
The car directly ahead halts. Essek swears and steps on the brake. He stares at Jester. “Pardon?”
She just grins at him.
“I was not listening. Sorry.”
“Oh that’s okay,” she croons, “But guess what…”
Essek is familiar with this tone. It doesn't scare him as much as it used to; he’s developed somewhat of a pavlovian response to her mischief in spite of his initial displeasure. As her grin widens, Essek feels a mirrored anticipatory smile spread across his face.
“You’re stuck in here with me,” she sings, waving her index fingers side-to-side with each word, “and we’re stuck in here together, and I wanna know the truth. So…” She leans forward. “Don’t you like him?”
Essek, face hot, but still smiling, reaches for the radio fast enough to fumble the air conditioning.
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meruz · 3 years
Text
i was gonna draw tonight but i dropped my tablet pen and the barrel of the pen broke off and flew somewhere underneath (??) my bed (?) and now i cant find it so I’m just gonna answer asks before bed instead. just some art asks and more mentions of infinity train LOL
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What program and brushes do you use when making your art?
@ravki hi! part of this is in my FAQ but i’ll say it again anyways LOL: I use photoshop CC and have used photoshop for pretty much....my whole art career. I’ve dabbled in clip and paint tool sai in the past but photoshop is my true wife, we eloped away from her awful father adobe many years ago and are very happy together. 
as for brushes... I should prob put this info in my FAQ too lol,... my default brush set is actually free to download here! Tho I will say I also use steve ahn’s storyboarding brush sometimes and lately i’ve been using shiyoon kim’s brushes A TON. Shiyoon’s cost a couple bucks but they’re super worth it imo
How do you choose colors?
This is kind of a difficult one to describe from scratch but hmm.... I’ll put it this way. Generally when I go into coloring or painting something I already have some colors in mind. Like for a certain piece I know I want a bright green, or a magenta, or a dark blue in certain areas. A lot of the time I know a mood I want. So I’ll start with that core color tone and build around it. I’ll use an example from a recent piece
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So you can see here that the first color I accessed was that bright cyan. So I start with that bright cyan and then bring in its “friends” in the form of analogous colors (shown below on the far left)
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greens greys etc. THEN I know I want the characters to stand out against all the blue so I start laying down warm contrasting colors for them (middle group). the mat under them is orange, skin tones are warm, ryans flannel is red etc. then to get them to work together I work more cool colors into the shadows and slightly warmer (not too warm because its a cool img overall so in this case, greener LOL) colors into highlights. 
hope that makes sense? for me choosing colors is a lot about story and composition. If you know what you want to say, the mood you want to create, where you want to go, the path to get there becomes a lot clearer imo.
Have you ever considered making an art book?
I have! But I don’t think I currently have enough...original illustrations for one LOL? Not that an art book has to be all original work but if I were putting fanart in an art book...at that point I’d just make a fanzine. I’m making more original work lately though so maybe this year....? Who knows. For now, I do have a sketchbook up on gumroad. Hoping to do one of those next year too.
Any tips for keeping background drawings from getting super stiff, especially since things like interiors have a lot of straight lines?
This is a really interesting ask. Really great question that I don’t think gets asked enough - forgive me if I get a bit art school here but I drew up some examples.
First I think we have to investigate the assumption that straight lines make things stiff. That seems true on an instinctual level and certainly proves to be true very often But I don’t think its actually the straight lines themselves but the sort of arrangements and compositions they tend to dictate. Take this for instance.
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pretty big difference, right? there’s a couple things that make a composition feel stiff and one of the most significant is lines that are perpendicular and parallel to the frame. it feels locked in and solid, like bricks. but the moment you shift these angles even a little the composition instantly becomes more dynamic because our innate senses of weight, gravity, and directionality can sense movement.
But it’s not just diagonals let’s take this one step further
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when lines meet and terminate together those tangents can flatten and lock space so the best way to solve this is with overlap and complete intersection, forms continuing past or behind each other feel more layered and less like a flat mosaic... again, even in the simplest line drawings. So how do we apply this to a background?
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ok I drew this really fast so its potentially not the best example but I think the idea is there. This space isn’t even particularly deep, it’s basically a room, a doorway, and a hallway behind it, and we’re not seeing that much of any of those things LOL. but when you draw an environmental object like a doorway in a way that lines up with the perpendicular and parallel lines of the canvas you’re automatically flattening it and making it look rigid.
and when you create tangents with objects and characters you flatten the space around them and make it difficult to tell what is actually in front or behind or if they’re on the same plane.
GOD I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE. Anyways. avoid those things and you’ll instantly have less stiff bgs no matter what kind of bg you’re depicting.
I wanna mention however that this isn’t to say a stiff bg with flat space doesn’t have its purposes.
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sometimes you want to create parallels and tangents. it can make characters feel closed in, trapped, regimented, part of a routine, etc. it’s also great for making a composition look ornamental (especially combined with symmetry).
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directors like wes anderson can even use these compositional elements to make images feel uncanny or harrowing! its very versatile. I think the important thing is to just be aware of when you are making something rigid and when that’s the last thing you want to do. conscious choices.
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Can you speak Tagalog?
@lemuelzero101​ I can! BUT NOT VERY WELL LOL ;;; both my parents are from Visayas! but they met and had me in the states lol so I’m pretty American born and raised. We go back to visit family on occasion but not regularly. My tagalog is mostly absorbed from listening to relatives at parties lol and my parents speak bisaya at home so I’m marginally better at that. Sorry to any filipinos out there hoping I’d be better educated, I’m like a little baby...
I do love meeting and talking to other filipinos online though, I grew up in an area that was relatively diverse but the asian population was small and the filipino population basically non-existent. I was like one of maybe 2 filipino kids in my highschool of 2000.
Apart from infinity train what shows are you watching now? Have you seen jujitsu kaisen?
Man this is gonna sound so boring but I haven’t watched a lot of tv lately.  It’s not really part of my daily routine. Let’s see... I was sort of watching Amphibia, Craig of the Creek, and the new Digimon Adventure 2020 but I keep falling off watching those for one reason or another. Also there’s a lot of episodes, it doesn’t feel like something I can just binge and be done with.
The last thing I binged was Succession. I want that show and Euphoria back so bad, when I’m done forcing all my friends to watch Infinity Train im cancelling my HBO subscription until Succession and Euphoria return so they know exactly what I’m on their list for LOL. 
I have not watched jujitsu kaisen but I’ve kept up with some of the sakuga news (I keep up with anime industry news and production info like x5 the amt i keep up with actual anime) for it and their compositing/editing looks dope. I’ve read the manga actually LOL or at least part of the beginning. I wasn’t super keen on the whole finger eating thing. Also to be honest I kinda feel like its the new Bleach and I never particularly cared about Bleach. Characters look nice enough tho. I wholeheartedly support jjk fans.
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Thank you! Thank you @keznodzieja​! <3
And thank you anons who don’t watch infinity train LOL...it’s always nice to hear when people enjoy my fanart despite not knowing the source material because it lifts a little bit of the “oh god am I being annoying???” fear off my chest. But also I think you should watch infinity train because it’s really good I have no reservations recommending it.
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slytherweasley · 3 years
Text
Try something new (Hermione Granger x reader)
Warnings: Smut and swearing
Summary- Hermione misses Y/n after she goes away for the summer and her feelings towards her become stronger but different.
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You and Hermione weren’t able to see each other over the summer because you went on holidays to France. The whole time you were there you couldn’t help but wish you were with your girlfriend. You bought Hermione so many French books and little gifts.
On the Hogwarts express you walk through looking for the trio and you finally find them. Hermione gets up and gives you a hug “Y/n!” “I missed you so much.” She lets go of the hug and cups your face with her hands kissing you. Harry looks away blushing “Tell me all about France! I bet it was so beautiful.” You sit beside her and tell her all about it. “I got something for everyone” you give Ron and Harry a small Eiffel Tower.
You show her some photos “Here’s me in front of the Eiffel Tower” she places her hand on your upper thigh without a second thought. It sent jolts through your body, she was just leaning over but it made you tingly. “You look gorgeous” “Uh yeah, thanks” it was hard to concentrate when she always seemed to be touching you.
Small things she would do would turn you on so much sometimes you had to handle it yourself when you got the chance to be alone. It seemed like you both always wanted to be touching each other in some way. Even Harry and Ron noticed “Since you got back Hermione hasn’t been able to have a conversation without your name coming up.” “Oh give me a break, I haven’t seen Y/n all summer” “Summer was ages ago” “You don’t understand, you don’t have a girlfriend.” Hermione kisses your cheek.
In Defense Against the Dark Arts class you sit beside Hermione “Find a partner to work on this assignment, this is a big assignment” Snape announces. You quickly turn your head to Hermione putting your hand on her thigh out of habit. “Do you want to work together?” “Umm yeah” she looks down and then back at you “Sorry” you take your hand off her thigh “It’s okay, I kind of want class to be over” she mumbles. “What? That’s not like you. What’s wrong?” “Today hasn’t been good I just want a kiss from my girlfriend.” You look at Snape who’s back is turned you peck Hermione’s lips “I’ll give you a proper kiss after class.”
You take Hermione to a quiet hallway away from people. She pushes you against the wall and kisses you. Your hand travels from her back to underneath her skirt squeezing her bum. She stops kissing you “Merlin Y/n!” “You want me to stop?” “N-no just be careful” “Do you like it when I touch you in that way?” “Y-yes, I want to try something” “Go ahead.” Hermione has always been quite scared of anything more than making out, she doesn’t like making out in her underwear. You’ve always told her it was alright and when she’s ready, so now she wants to try something you welcome it.
She unbuttons your shirt far enough to see your bra “Oh wow” her face goes red and looks away “It’s okay Mione do what you want” she grabs them giving it a squeeze. You move your hand up and down her underwear, before you could do anything the bell rings for the next class. She buttons up your shirt and you take your hand out from under her skirt. “That was scary” she says “Do you regret it?” “Not really but that can’t happen again.” Hermione couldn’t get the feeling of you feeling her up out of her head even though it was over her underwear she was so turned on.
You and Hermione talked to some friends before dinner then you did a bit of studying in the library while Hermione hung out in your dorm. You got some studying done so you left and came back a bit early. You open the door to Hermione naked from the waist down, her legs spread out on her bed and rubbing her clit. “Oh shit, I’m sorry Mione I didn’t know- I didn’t mean to- I mean-” you shut the door and turn around, millions of thoughts running through your head. Should you leave or go in there and help or just forget everything and you saw her almost naked for the first time.
The door swings open and Hermione grabs you by the arm pulling you in. “I thought you were reading or something” You explain sitting down on her bed opposite her “Please don’t tell anyone” “Bubs, you’re my girlfriend. I’m not telling anyone, why would I?” “It’s embarrassing. I don’t do it a lot” “When did you start?” “This year, I’ve been so horny lately, I’ve read lots of books on it.” You laugh “Of course you did” “Do you do it?” “All the time. Mione you’ve been making me horny without realising it.” “I’m sorry” “Don’t be, you aren’t ready” “I want to be ready for you but I don’t want to go all the way, just slow steps” “It’s okay, princess. We can be as slow as you want.”
“I am throbbing really bad, do you mind if I finish?” Hermione asks “Go ahead finish yourself off.” “In front or you?” “I can leave if you want” “No! I mean- I want you to stay” “Okay I’ll stay.” She lifts up her skirt exposing her bare cunt “I knew you’d have a pretty pussy” she blushes. “This feels weird” she says “Do you want me to help? I’ll use my fingers” “Yes please.” You kiss the inside of her thighs she moans. “Holy shit Hermione” she blushes “Sorry” “No please, I want to hear you.”
You use your fingers to rub her clit at a slow pace, Hermione moans. “You’re so desperate, aren’t you princess?” “Please faster, I’m sensitive!” She yells. “Tell me how good it feels first” “Ahh so good” she tries to move your hand to rub her faster. “You want to rub your clit, princess?” “Yes!” You take your fingers off her clit. She rubs herself faster moaning, you kiss her neck and jaw. “Oh shit” she moans “Did you finish?” “Yeah, holy shit that was so good” “That was the hottest thing I’ve experienced.”
You get Hermione some pyjamas to change into, you get into your pyjamas to get rid of the wet feeling between your legs “Wow Y/n, your underwear is soaked” “I told you your moans are hot” “Do you want to go relieve yourself?” “No I’ll just deal with it, they will probably be back soon.” Hermione turns back around to continue getting changed.
Things were different after that, Hermione became much more confident. In the last class of the day Hermione decided she was in the mood to tease you. She slides her hand up your skirt “Hermione what are you doing?” “I’m so bored of Snapes talking.” She moves a finger up and down your slit over your underwear instantly making you wet. She presses a finger on your clit over your underwear “I’m going to moan if you keep going” “No, you have to keep quiet.” You did what she said and put your hand over your mouth.
You take Hermione’s hand and go straight to your shared dorm. You get on her bed and kiss her. She leaves hickeys on your neck and collar bones. You start to grind your hips on hers trying to relieve yourself of the throbbing. You take your lips off hers “I’m sorry Princess I can’t do this I’m so wet” “It’s okay, I can help you if you want” “I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”
You start to take off your clothes and Hermione watches, neither of you have ever seen each other naked. She watches carefully as you unclip your bra and pull down your underwear. Hermione lets out a small quiet moan you smile “What d’you think?” “You’re perfect” she smiles.
You lay on your bed and she tries to distract herself with a book as you finger yourself. Your moans came louder “Oh fuck, so good Mione” you moan, Hermione shifts on her bed uncomfortably and watches you. Your moans become louder, you screw your eyes shut and imagine Hermione and you can’t stop moaning her name.
Hermione gets up and starts to get undressed, you feel her get on the bed beside you then you feel her small fingers rubbing your clit as you pound your fingers into yourself. You open your eyes and see her sitting in the edge of the bed naked.
“Oh fuck” you moan and grab one of her tits massaging her nipple “You going to cum?” She asks “Y-yeah!” You feel yourself pulse around your fingers as you finish. “Thanks Mione” you kiss her lips “I’m so ready Y/n” “Are you sure?” “One hundred percent sure.”
She climbs on top of you and kisses you, you feel her hot wet cunt on your lower stomach. She kisses down your stomach and kisses your clit, she puts two fingers inside of you slowly. “Mione I just came” “I know I want to see you do it again” “Ah shit, use your tongue on my clit” you moan “How?” “You can flick it or suck it whatever you want, it will feel amazing.” She ficks it with her tongue then licks a stripe up your pussy continuing to finger you. “That tastes really good” Hermione says then starts to suck on your clit. You finish in a matter of minutes of her sucking on your clit.
“It’s your turn, I’ll give you the best orgasm ever” you flip her over and she starts laughing “I’m so nervous that I’m laughing so much.” You smile and kiss her cheek “We can wait until you’re ready, I promise I’ll take care of you.” “Just do it, I’m ready” you kiss her cheek “I want to make sure you’re comfortable” “I’m comfortable just nervous.”
You kiss down her stomach sucking hickeys as you go down you kiss the inside of her thighs, you notice she’s stopped laughing as much and she’s relaxing. “You ready?” You ask her “Yes” you open up her legs wider and lick up her cunt she lets out a loud moan “Does that feel good?” “Please keep going” you smile and go down on her again. She grabs a hold of your hair and pulls on it a bit. “So good Y/n” she moans.
You move your fingers faster inside her until her legs start to shake. She can barely form a sentence but I hear her try to talk “You close?” You ask looking up at her and she nods her head and finishes around your fingers. You let her calm down from her high comforting her with a kiss on the cheek and your arms wrapped around her. “Thank you” she finally says “How do you feel now that we had sex together?” “I wouldn’t want it with anyone else. You’re so good at getting me wet and your body is quite attractive.” Her face goes bright red “Well I’m not surprised at how pretty your body is” you flick her nipple.
We take a shower together then fall asleep cuddled up in bed. The next morning Hermione has vanished from the bed. You get up and get dressed going down to breakfast. It’s a Friday morning she probably got up early to study. You were correct she was studying but not magic.
She hurries into the great hall making sure she’s not late. She kisses your lips and grabs some food “Early morning studying?” Harry asks “Yes! Love, I have so much to tell you” “Tell me then.” “Apparently having sex at least twice a week relieves tension” Ron and Harry look in other directions “Do you need to be talking about this now?” “Yes! Our sex shouldn’t be different to anyone else who talks about it.” Ron blushes “It’s true” “So I read this book about different ways” she starts whispering different positions and how to do them.
“Maybe we should start on some of those tonight?” “Perfect” she smiles.
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naalbinder · 3 years
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phoebe bridgers // elliott smith parallels
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4BEfu6YZ7XbdHFZBXthIpN?si=6bf8fc460eba4d33
E - Riot Coming - “Sat down in jail with this friend of mine/Who'd never close both his eyes/But one was shut all the time/To cover the thing he was scared of”
E - Stupidity Tries “To sail across the sea of trash”
E - Going nowhere - “The old records are sitting on the floor/The ones I can’t put on anymore”
E - Clementine - “Anything to pass the time/And keep that song out of your mind”
P - Smoke Signals - “One of your eyes is always half-shut/Something happened when you were a kid” - “burning trash out on the beach” - “You said that song'll creep you out until you're dead”
E - Miss Misery - (music videos on the same street)
E - Easy way out - “While I watch you making mistakes/I wish you luck I really do” “I heard you found another audience to bore”
E - Looking Over My Shoulder - “Another sick rock ‘n’ roller acting like a dick”
E - Placeholder - “I'm the person you'll never need/The biggest loser on sixteenth street” - “Just like my favourite song/Some pretty words that didn't last that long”
P - Motion Sickness - “I'll be glad that I made it out/And sorry that it all went down like it did” “You said when you met me, you were bored” - “Hey, why do you sing with an English accent?/I guess it's too late to change it now”
E - Some Song - “Help me kill my time cause I'll never be fine”
P - Funeral - “Jesus Christ i'm so blue all the time/And that's just how i feel/Always have and i always will ”
E - Bled White - “Happy and sad come in quick succession/I’m never going to become what you became”
P - Demi Moore - “I got a good feeling/It doesn't happen very often”
E - St Ides Heaven - “With an open container from 7/11”
E - A Fond Farewell - “A fond farewell to a friend”
P - Scott Street - “With an open heart, open container” - “Anyway, don’t be a stranger / don’t be a stranger”
E - Last Call - “And I think I’m all done, you can switch me off safely/While i’m lying here for sleep to overtake me”
E - Roman Candle - “I’m a roman candle/My head is full of flames ”
P - Killer - “But when I’m sick and tired/And when my mind is barely there/When a machine keeps me alive/And I’m losing all my hair/I hope you kiss my rotten head/And pull the plug” - “Tame the fire in you”
E - Georgia Georgia
P - Georgia - “Georgia, Georgia, I love your son”
E - Twilight - “That you are already somebody’s baby”
E - See you later - “Made out of a night train”
E - King’s Crossing - “Instruments shine on a silver tray”
P - Chelsea - “You are somebody’s baby” - “For a chemical imbalance/You sure know how to ride a train” - “With a needle on a tray”
E - Christian Brothers - “No bad dream fucker's gonna boss me around/Christian brothers gonna take him down”
P - Would you rather - “Quarantined in a bad dream/He's half the man and you're twice as tall”
E - Son of Sam - “Son of Sam, son of a doctors love a nurses touch/Acting under orders from above”
P - You Missed My Heart - “A feeling of relief came over my soul/I couldn't take it any longer, and I lost control”
E - Bye - (instrumental)
E - New Monkey (Instrumental)
P - DVD Menu - (instrumental)
E - Coming up roses - “And you're coming up roses everywhere you go/Red roses follow”
E - Rose Parade - “Said, Won't you follow me down to the Rose Parade?”
P - Garden Song “They're gluing roses on a flatbed/You should see it, I mean thousands”
E - Condor Ave - “I don’t know what to do with your clothes or your letters”
E - Baby Britain - “Fights problems with bigger problems/Sees the ocean fall and rise/Counts the waves that somehow didn’t hit her/Water pouring from her eyes/Alcoholic and very bitter”
E - Say Yes - “I'm in love with the world/Through the eyes of a girl/Who's still around the morning after”
E - Seen How Things Are Hard - “You just didn't care/You were off getting drunk instead”
E - The Biggest Lie - "Oh, I just told the biggest lie/ I just told the biggest lie/The biggest lie"
P - Kyoto - “And you wrote me a letter/But I don't have to read it” - “I wanted to see the world/Then I flew over the ocean/And I changed my mind” - “I wanted to see the world/Through your eyes until it happened/Then I changed my mind” - “I'm gonna kill you/If you don't beat me to it” - "Guess I lied/I'm a liar/Who lies/'Cause I'm a liar"
E - Memory Lane - “Your little house on memory lane ”
E - Angel in the Snow - “Angel in the snow/all crushed out on the way you are”
E - Last Call - “And I wanted her to tell me that she would never wake me”
E - New Monkey - “For the millions of fans ignoring the bands”
E - Waltz #2 - “I'm never gonna know you now/But I'm gonna love you anyhow”
E - Amity - “I'm a neon sign and I stay open all the time”
P - Punisher - “The house where you lived with Snow White” - “But never not sweet to the trust funds and punishers” - “What if I told you/I feel like I know you?/But we never met” - “The drugstores are open all night/The only real reason I moved to the east side”
E - Some Song - “Yeah it's halloween tonight and every night”
E - Pitseleh - “I got a joke I've been dying to tell you/A silent kid is looking down the barrel/To make the noise that I kept so quiet”
P - Halloween - “Baby, it's Halloween” - “I hate living by the hospital/The sirens go all night/I used to joke that if they woke you up/Somebody better be dying”
E - Shooting Star - “So bad, so far/You made me sad/Shooting star/You're distant and cold/And a sight to behold/Everybody just sighs”
E - Satellite - “When they call it a lover's moon, the satellite/'Cause it acts just like lovers do, the satellite/A burned-out world you know/Staying up all night/The satellite”
E - Everything Reminds Me of Her - “Why are you staring into outer space, crying?/Just because you came across it and lost it”
P - Chinese Satellite - “Took a tour to see the stars/But they weren't out tonight/So I wished hard on a Chinese satellite” - “Sometimes, when I can't sleep/It's just a matter of time before I'm hearing things” b- “Instead, I look at the sky and I feel nothing/You know I hate to be alone/I want to be wrong”
E - Coast to Coast - “Still you're keeping me around/'Til I finally drag us both down (Gonna drag us both down)”
E - Little one - “The moonlight tonight/Seems to belong to me” - “One more/Little one, I love you”
E - Coming up Roses - “The moon is a sickle cell/It'll kill you in time” “While the moon does its division/You're buried below”
E - Everything Means Nothing to Me - “At attention, looking backward in a pool of water/Wishes with a blue songbird on his shoulder/Who keeps singing over everything”
E - Pretty Mary K (Other Version) - “oh Mary K, I can see your face/down there in the waves, painted and erased/but I know it's just a reflection of the moon”
P - Moon song - (52) “You asked to walk me home/But I had to carry you” - (53) “And if I could give you the moon/I would give you the moon” - (54) “You are sick and you're married/And you might be dying” - (55/56) “And you pushed me in/And now my feet can't touch the bottom of you” “But you're holding me like water in your hands/When you saw the dead little bird”
E - New Disaster - “Everybody is the same in this long no-win game/Where every new blood/Gets time to become resigned” - “Until everyone knows that your smile is just a ghost/The ghost of your smile was seen on a body in the park”
P - Savior Complex - “Baby, you're a vampire/You want blood and I promised” - “All the bad dreams that you hide/Show me yours, I'll show you mine”
E - Oh well, Ok - “If you get a feeling next time you see me/Do me a favor and let me know/Cause it's hard to tell, it's hard to say 'oh well, Ok'”
E - Last Call - “You're a tongueless talker/You don't care what you say”
E - Angel in the Snow - “Only a cold still life/ that fell down here to lay beside you”
P - ICU - (58) “But I feel something when I see you now/I feel something when I see you” - (59) “I hate your mom/I hate it when she opens her mouth/It's amazing to me/How much you can say/When you don't know what you're talking about” - “laying down on the lawn” “if you’re a work of art/I’m standing too close/I can see the brush strokes”
E - Happiness / The Gondola Man - “What I used to be/Will pass away and then you'll see/That all I want now/Is happiness for you and me”
E - Whatever (Folk Song in C) - “Whatever you're doing now would probably suit me fine/If you're all done, like you said you'd be/What are you doing hanging out with me?”
E - Big Ballad of Nothing - “You can do what you want to whenever you want to/You can do what you want to there's no one to stop you”
P - Graceland too - “Said she knows she lived through it to get to this moment” - “Whatever she wants (Whatever you want)”
E - Bottle up and Explode “Bottle up and go/I can make it outside”
E - A Distorted Reality is Now a Necessity to be Free - “God knows why my country don't give a fuck” - “Shine on me baby, because it's raining in my heart”
E - Alphabet Town - “Alphabet City is haunted”
P - I Know The End - “There's no place like my room” - “To some America First rap country song” “Driving out into the sun/Let the ultraviolet cover me up”- “I'll find a new place to be from/A haunted house with a picket fence”
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