#are the only thing really motivating me

[uncanny-tranny]

Basically, my philosophy around disability fakers is: I would rather a thousand people fake a disability than have one disabled person suffer without care, aids, compassion, or any help.

#disability #disability advocacy #and there's a difference not many people seem to recognize between faking and realizing you don't have [x] problem... #...such as realizing you don't have [x] disorder because it is instead [y] disorder... #...or you haven't completely understood your care needs/your symptoms/what helps you... #...and some people see ANY change in your understanding of your disability as proof of maliciously faking... #...when i suppose in my personal experience people don't *maliciously* fake disability... #...i'm not saying it could never happen but that i don't think it's the *only* thing motivating people called fakers #i just think (like most everything) this is complex and nuanced because it's a *human* experience #like for me personally i /know/ i still have a lot to learn about my disabilities... #...like... i realized recently that my hands shouldn't be in AGONY when warm water is ran over them when it's SLIGHTLY cold inside or out... #...and i realized that i likely have a Noticable limb difference that needs checking out. does this sound like i'm faking... #...or that maybe i just didn't really explore my own needs and body because of a variety of factors? #i can assure you it is because i haven't really thought before about how i deserved to understand how to best help myself

[bixels]

While I do think anon was rude, I do think it's pretty shitty to set up all this stuff you were going to add the au and then just drop it. It's disappointing. Definitely unfollowing.

Bye.

#ask me #anon #once AGAIN. #I am not dropping anything #the au is not getting cancelled. more than likely i'm gonna take a break from it until i find motivation again #But I've been drawing the AU for half a fucking year #In that time I've only drawn 5 things that aren't mlp related #I'm getting tired and my last few posts didn't do as well as I'd hoped #And I'm not about to burn myself out on mlp au art even if I really do love making it #I'm still gonna make comics. I have a bunch of ideas. #Tulli and I still wanna do the limited run merch shop #Discord is still coming. Sunset is still coming. Sombra is still coming. I have so many ideas #But I need to do something else for my own sake. Did you know I was supposed to get the background 6 designs done by now #But I didn't because I'm TIRED #I've been keeping myself on a schedule to keep content pumping despite travel and school and family and I'm tired #what i'm getting isn't matching what i'm giving and that's nobody's fault. i'm not frustrated at anyone. a slump was bound to happen #drawing the au was fun until it become my Thing. Because when your Thing––your identity––starts to faulter #it can really make you freak out #And that's not healthy for the project or for myself. I need to find the fun again and I'm sure I will #I'm really appreciative of everyone's support in my inbox and replies it really does mean a lot especially given that about 2/3 of my #followers followed for mlp. But if you're gonna react to me saying “i'm gonna cool down on mlp art and draw my own stuff” with “i'm #disappointed in you." then Leave! I think it's good you're unfollowing #you are not obligated to stick by my side! But don't act like I'm doing you a disservice by turning my attention elsewhere #I didn't promise anyone anything and I definitely didn't say I'm breaking any promises.

[irradiatedrosegarden]

sometimes you just gotta lick the homies

#(and blatantly admit your dishonesty to them. yknow. normal friendship things) #friendship is a really strong word tho. at least for these guys #purposely gonna be vague about their relationship for now but i will say that they both consider killing the other on multiple occasions :) #and also they slow dance and kiss but that's unrelated #oh oh oh i should say for those who don't know - daisy (my courier) is a trans woman and uses she/her pronouns #she's got a bit of a beard here but that's bc the only sharp things in the sierra madre are knives #and lies #but those aren't great for shaving #:) #new vegas #dead money #fallout new vegas #fnv #dean domino #daisy correa #courier six #irradiated art #i loveeeeeeeee dead money so much i am kissing the entire dlc on the mouth #dead money <33333333 #forced cooperation between a group whose only motive to help the others (at least initially) is that if they don't they die <3333333 #a fuckn casino heist <333 !!!!! hello. insane dlc concept. insane execution (/pos). i love it to bits it makes me so sad and so so so hyped

[sarasade]

AU where Aaravos kept his promise to Claudia and then keeps the gang around for his later plans.

The thought of Aaravos doing something kind for completely self-serving reasons just tickles my mind. I love it when villains do stuff like that. (also poor Claudia was so miserable in the Lost Child -short. she deserves to get spoiled a little.)

#hc: Aaravos finding humans cute in the same way one finds a sad wet stray kitten cute #Aaravos being like: Damn I'll do one nice thing for these losers and they'll adore me forever after this #Terry is the only one with any common sense lmao #I think he'd tolerate Aaravos 'cause Claudia adores him but be really suspicious of his motives at the same time #sarasadeart #tdp claudia #tdp aaravos #aaravos #viren #tdp fan art #tdp terry

[aroanthy]

i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc

#what am i trying to say here? #idk! think about all of the pieces you have #dying is complicated in ohtori in countless different ways #and i find it boring to see so much ‘this character is dead and that’s it’ stuff #when death is used farrrrrrr more figuratively than some ppl give credit for #and i think the movie too does wonderful things with death #and what ‘dying’ really means #being disbelieved. being forgotten. being rejected. haunting despite this #much more interesting to think about wrt commentary on abusive relationships than it is #to think about what?? oh me when my brother died but plot twist he’s alive and can walk on this road all cool. like????? #akio doesn’t have the power to make himself revenant #he THINKS he does and he absolutely has power when he’s alive and he imbues that power with such meaning that it does live on after him #but ANTHY. anthy is the one struggling with herself and her feelings and the impact of trauma and abuse (that power!!) in aou #he’s dead? he died? she brought him back through her memories? or she’s left him (metaphorical death) and he’s haunting her?? #all such interesting interpretations #i haven’t mentioned touga bc i don’t have the energy today. if dead and just illusion of others memories then why active. why awful #like in aou akio is only Obviously scummy when he’s alive. his illusory self is based upon anthy’s love for him #if anime!touga is nothing more than nanami/whoever’s memories of him before he died……. why does he actively choose to suck again and again #like nanami wouldn’t do that. unless it was meant to be a subconscious thing like ooo he’s dead all along but that’s not what her arc is #it’s not ‘he’s been dead all along’ literally or figuratively. it’s ‘he’s unsafe and i don’t want him’ #sigh. once again i am asking people to think about nanami and touga’s dynamic through touga’s eyes #it’s so interesting to me how people forget to consider his motivations or feelings on ANYTHING #like sure his motivations and feelings are scummy but they’re interesting!!!!! they intrigue me!!!! #compel me even #anyway ignore how i said i didn’t have the energy for this and then typed it all out anyway #dais.txt

[diaruchann]

I think for most people it went:

Percy Jackson -> Greek Mythology -> Epic: The Musical

But somehow for me it was:

Epic: The Musical -> Percy Jackson -> Greek Mythology

#I've read the first book years ago but didn't have the motivation to continue #and now I have a new hyperfixation #and I mean a HYPERFIXATION #I can't stop thinking about pjo it's a problem #do you ever want to do something but you're too excited to do the said thing that by the time you actually get to do it #it is physically painful and you can't stop stimming and your heart beat goes crazy and you SHAKE WITH EXCITEMENT #that's me with reading pjo #I also recently listened ONLY epic the musical for 8 hours straight everyday for four days straight so #do you guys know that one 3.5 hour video about the whole greek mythology on youtube #that has been really useful #anyway real tags now #epic the troy saga #epic the cyclops saga #epic the ocean saga #epic the musical #epic the circe saga #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #peter johnson #rick riordan #pjo

[dare-to-dm]

I find it very hard to motivate myself to clean because I just don't care. If I lived all alone I'd live in filth. And I have yet to find a way to "trick" myself into it.

Like, if I tell myself "You need to clean the basement before you can play that video game you really like" my brain will just retort with "That bitch is lying, there's nothing stopping us from playing video games whenever we want" and nothing gets done.

The only method that I've discovered that works is a two pronged strategy. First) Invite someone I like to my house to hang out in the near future. Get a solid playdate planned. That'll get my ass in gear.

Then) Get drunk. Sober me is too wily to fall for tricks, but drunk me thinks it's a party if there's music playing and will not only do the bare minimum but will get creative.

This has given me a lot of empathy for those 50s housewives.

#to be clear I don't live in filth #but the only thing that really motivates me is consideration for other people #so I have to weaponize that #if I was a housewife I would definitely be an alcoholic too #Dare Original

[cuubism]

hello friends. despite my 9 million existing dreamling wips i'm feeling the need to branch out a bit for the sake of my mental variety. what pairing other than dreamling should i write a little something for? could be romantic or platonic

other way of phrasing i guess: any pairings you really want to see more fics for in the fandom?

#i actually do have one someone asked me for ages ago i've been meaning to get to so i'll try to do that too #bonus points if it still involves dream bc you know i love dream XD #probably wont do any romantic pairings /between/ the endless because well yeah #but open to exploring pretty much anything else... feel free to send whatever if you want. dont worry about if i'll like it #if i can't vibe with it or find it uncomfy i just won't write it no harm no foul #not me soliciting little prompts fully knowing that motivation is a fickle beast and who knows if i would get to writing them XD i want #to though! or like. idk. if anyone wants to share headcanons about their favorite pairings i am happy to receive them #the sandman #a couple that are bouncing around my head already: #rose meeting desire. this could be really interesting i think (they are of course her grandparent) #calliope and lucienne post-calliope's imprisonment: i think their dynamic could be interesting since they both have/had close relationships #with dream. but of course calliope's relationship with him fell apart. i think lucienne with whatever context of it she had would probably #be sympathetic to calliope's perspective but still staunchly On Dream's Side so the speak bc she is ultimately very loyal to him... could b #an interesting convo. #additionally - calliope and johanna. both suffered things recently. both had curious interactions with dream where they recently saw both #his vicious side AND a kinder more understanding side of him... [dream gave rachel a peaceful death at johanna's request etc] #but they've come out of their suffering really differently (granted it was different types of suffering. but) #wow here i am asking for people's ideas and then just coming up with my own XD #anyway #wait two others: i'm fascinated by the potential dynamic of lucienne and the corinthian they only had like one short scene together in the #show but can you imagine. spending eons being loyal to dream and then going opposite directions with that loyalty. being among dream's inne #circle so to speak except lucienne is her own entity while corinthian was /created/ by dream. they have the most fascinating venn diagram o #personality traits and narrative positions... #secondly. and this is kind of crack. but like. imagine johanna and corinthian in the same room XD 'hi i'm an exorcist and this is my pet #serial killer' 'yeah my lord gave me a vacation to go kill some demons' why doesn't he try to kill johanna? bc she tried to destroy him #first time they met and he can't help but respect it XD

[fleouriarts]

feeling bad about my art lately. will probably not post for a while. but i wanted to at least dump some stuff here before i retreat into my hidey hole

#hivemind tv #riley savage #graydon weaver #hmfcu #quadeca #jane remover #eden burke #my art #2023 #fanart #doodles #its like. augh. longtime fleouriarts followers are familiar with my eternal tango with posting art online #doing this since i was 11 has like rotted my brain and made me rely wayyyy too much on external validation to motivate myself #and every year or so it gets bad enough that i take a break. but the break usually only lasts a month before i miss the feeling #and come back and then the cycle repeats #its probably worse now bc this is a fandom where getting seen by the creators is not really that hard #so there have been times where im like 'well idk if i wanna draw this. but if i do maybe hivemind will rt it :-)' #NO!!! THATS NOT WHAT ART IS ABOUT!!!!! i cant keep letting myself get addicted to the numbers going up man i gotta get out of here #and i was reading a quad interview from around when idmthy got released. cus hes also brain poisoned like this. but he managed to get out #and now just kinda comes online to release music and then leave #i need to be like that. i need to take a break from art posting thats so long that i come back as a changed man odysseus style #idk. its been so long since i drew stuff that no one gets to see but me. all the art i keep to myself is just out of embarrassment #i need to relearn how to draw stuff just for the love of creation and not “maybe people online will like this one” #or “this new thing came out i need to prove my love of it by drawing it” #sometimes it leads to good art but more often than not it just makes me feel worse #whatever. if any of yall are in the hivemind jane or quadeca discord i MIGHT still post stuff there. but otherwise ill keep to myself and m #friends for a while i think #woooooo this is queued to post while im in orgo lab everyone wish me luck with my thin layer chromatography

[bonefall]

Voted for Bumble bc of course but also if you think Alex would not pspsps Bumble you are wrong. If they could communicate they would go to therapy together /s

If then could communicate they would go to therapy together

/GEN

Kyle/Green Lantern resurrects her but then he becomes convinced that she's not the same person she was before the incident, OR SOMETHING SOMETHING Black Lanterns aren't ACTUALLY bad they're just misunderstood Grim Reaper types, in either case Alex ends up breaking it off with Kyle because they've become very different people.

And then Bumble's there

And then they go to therapy or Alex adopts Bumble, and then uhhh Bumble's like one of the superpets. Like Krypto the Superdog. Free premise go forth and play with it if ur a DC fan

#bone babble #Again I don't actually know a lot about the DC universe besides what my friend tells me #But also from reading into the Black Lanterns having them be evil sound like a WHOLE wasted opportunity #Lanterns are supposed to be emotions yeah? so why the hell are we downplaying the emotion of GRIEF? #There's a whole lot you could do with that actually. Death doesn't deserve to just be a villain of the week #And hell. You could explore some WILD emotions here about Alex becoming so much more than Kyle's tragedy #Can I still mourn you when you aren't dead? #What does it mean for me that the worst thing that ever happened to me has become an opportunity for her? #And... does this make me selfish for not being happy for her? #For not trying to understand the person she has become? for only thinking of how this impacts myself #RE: THIS IS NOT A DIG AT DC FANS #BUT I want to share that like... a reason I've kinda had a hard time getting into comics is because like... really interesting premises-- #like that often get turned into Monster-of-the-Week struggles for the heroes to punch into submission #I've probably just seen really bad summaries or not found the editions that would appeal to me specifically #But it's kinda why the only DC hero I'm really interested in is Superman #Because a lot of his thing is that he's a good GUY #And that creates a lot of interesting moral questions #Like YES he's a good guy. YES he has no ulterior motive. But what if he DID?-- how can EVERYONE ELSE in the universe truly know that- #for sure? #And that's cool and I really like the snippets I've seen especially between him and batman #But anyway. so much fridging and misogyny in the world of comics has kinda turned me away from getting into it #because. VERY often. Misogyny can be... *tied* to a bit of a lack of imagination. Or empathy on behalf of a particular writer #RE: There is good stuff in DC PLEASE understand im not trying to be insulting

[godsfavoritescientist]

well hold on, if we define a character flaw as any limitation a character deals with, regardless of whether it's something Morally Wrong With Them or not, then Ford's paranoia counts as a character flaw since it does in fact negatively impact him and the people around him. Let me use better wording here: I will die on the hill that Ford's paranoia is not a moral failing.

#'i'll die on this hill' one second later: un-dies on that hill on a technicality #godsrambles #one way in which i probably differ from ford is that i could not care less about winning any arguments all i care about is being accurate #people are right about a lot of fords character flaws actually. the part they are wrong about is which ones are Moral Failings #and also people misinterpret his motivations and intentions behind things. but the flaws themselves? sure yeah people can identify those #unpopular opinion but i think ego is fine on its own too depending on how you define ego. case in point: papyrus. yknow the skeleton #it only becomes a problem when you're putting other people down. which i dont think ford is guiltless of but. the others do that too #idk sometimes when other people go 'omg... ego moment :/' im like 'a chance to hype eachother up! yay' i dont assume im being looked down o #unless thats specifically demonstrated to be happening #but the thing that kills me is that stan constantly puts other people down. but since he doesnt idk have an ego or talk weird its fine?? #i very much agree with dipper when he replied to mabel with 'ford doesnt make fun of me all the time like you guys do' #and like once again. to each their own #some people see that level of making fun of people/being made fun of as just friendly banter and thats fair enough #but i really appreciate that ford isn't like that

[wasyago]

hi sorry but do you plan on opening some commission slots any time soon? i really love your art and want to gib u som monye

:"D oh i appreciate it, thank you qwqq

i want to say "yeah I'll open them soon", but i've been wanting to say it for like, over a year now so im not sure when this soon is going to happen............... if i ever do open them there 100% will be a post about it, so you won't miss it

#yagotalk #i really just need to sit down and start doing things... but i get the motivation to do it only when i can't actually do anything. #and when i have the time and the energy im going 'oh wow let's draw some fanart instead' #what is wrong with me people can someone explain why this keeps happening

[my-name-is-bunnyfoxy]

POV: You want to join an art challenge for August regarding TMNT but the person hosting it is someone who wrote a Mikey gets adopted by the Rise turtles and you also fear that you doing it would come off as you supporting the creator meaning you support their fanfic that doesn't give any respect to 2012 and makes Mikey look like a damn crybaby and also for some reason calls him Casper and not to mention this person supports Unfamiliar Familiar

#Nah because I feel upset when I don't join an art challenge of sorts #Because I'm either lazy #Don't get in on time #I immediately give up #And other reasons #Or I feel like my drawing will suck because I can't do it #I've tried to do art month challenge thingy's like 2 times #One time in October in 2020 but didn't because I lost motivation and I was really late #And May of this year but immediately gave up afterwords because it felt like it be too much work #And now my new reason I probably won't do this art challenge #Is because the creator supports not only those god awful mikey gets adopted by rise fanfics #But also supports unfamiliar familiar #I feel like this person is rather less negative towards 2012 but I'm probably just being an optimistic idiot #Idk if I do this art challenge it will come off as me supporting things that I don't

[clarabow-mp3]

well that's just not true at all is it.

#sweeney todd #they're both tragic and complex characters imo #they do horrific things and sweeney is motivated by trauma and grief which eventually becomes pure vengeance and crosses the moral line #mrs lovett is motivated initially by love for sweeney but also by pure desperation #she needs to make a living!!! she can't catch enough cats and there's a surplus of meat around in the form of people her crush is murdering #it's horrible it's disgusting it's undeniably morally wrong and it's incredibly practical #it's genius in a way like. hide the evidence make some money and tie yourself forever to the man you love. #and adopt the first victim's little feral child ensuring you not only have someone to work in the shop but also someone who depends on you #who loves you and provides you with the care and affection you desperately want and aren't getting #but then it all crashes down and she realizes she has to kill the child who loves her #and then lucy is alive and her crimes are uncovered and she dies in her oven being forced to confront her sins and the fires of hell #i'm not saying she was justified i'm saying she was desperate #for money and food and shelter and all that but also for companionship and love #and that's really sad to me #anyway mrs lovett the original gaslight gatekeep girlboss

[crybaby-bkg]

I’m taking another creative writing class this semester but I’m so nervous bc writing hasn’t been coming as easily to me bc of this time of year + grief but I hope this class pulls me out of this rut 🥲

#like I still haven’t started on the security guard fic bc I’m just so. tired. #and I have little motivation #but I think it’s really bc of me anticipating this semester #and I feel like I can’t do anything until it starts #hopefully I’ll get back into the groove of things soon tho #but I’m excited for the class!!! #we have to write only one short story #and I already think I know what I want it to be about LOL #last time I took a creative writing class all of my writings were about death #so maybe I can change it this time around wkdjdkfjf #anyway the semester starts this week so wish me luck!! #—in store chit chat! 🍫

[anxiously-sidequesting]

To me personally malistaire is the funniest and most pathetic villain wizard101 has ever had AND I MEAN THAT SINCERELY!!! Between doomed children who have been manipulated, groomed, and isolated into becoming products of their environments, someone scorned who has been punished unfairly by having your biological heart torn out your chest and turning your children and all of reality against you to satiate their own ego, a nonhuman entity so powerful and so clueless they unintentionally threaten the lives of everyone around them, Malistaire FELL DOWN BRO. Like yeah you're bitchless now. You and me both. Get in line. Everyone in this room is bitchless. We are ALL living that ✨💅🏾💃🕺 Single Life™. You are a middle-aged man. Cope

#this post is lighthearted btw JELAJWODJTU i aint actually mad #but like...... malistaire as a villain is kinda mid though im sorry. IM SORRY ill take the L opinion if i have to #its one thing if he lost his wife to unfair systematic negligence or thru someone else's doings or smth but. no she just got sick bro 😐 #HWMSNFLEKSDIDOA EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE I WILL GIVW A BAD OPINION AND THIS IS ONE OF THEM. i cant be right ALL the time /j #like if i dont focus on malistaire's motives and just his ACTIONS he seems super metal #but then he does ALLLLL of that heinous shit because his wife died. like thats absolutely very sad but damn get a grip #(fandom starts breaking in my windows and drags me out into the street) IM SORRY IM SORRY LOOK ITS JUST NOT MY CUP OF TEA #ive never been invested in those Mr. Freeze types of villains where a person they love dies due to normal circumstances- #and they go fucking BERSERK. they LOSE IT. they go like “well okay fuck the entire world i guess nothing matters” and then kill people #LIKE IF IT'S DONE IN A CERTAIN WAY I CAN BE INVESTED but more often than not to me? its just kind of funny #like “okay damn there was only ONE person keeping you from being a national criminal? okay” #and you know what? thats a mood actually. thats a mood #without my cat i probanly would have become the president by now #for some reason its a little diff for me if its like a child you lost and idk why #like if malistaire lost a kid instead of his wife id probably be more inclined to feel bad and thats terribly fucked up JSLSJSJSJ #you know what its also bias because in some shape or form i relate to all the other villains. morganthe and duncan especially #whereas in malitsaire's case i have never been married. which i mean doesnt stop me from tryna be more synpathetic i guess but im just not #ONCE AGAIN FEEL VERY BAD FOR HIM AND SULVIA. like losing someone to sickness or any reason really is a serious thing #but in terms of a fictional setting with fictional characters where one of them decides to commit genocide over it? 🧍 like okay boo u do u #i will gladly give up my mantle for the “most reasonable opinions” guy in the fandom foe this one. i deserve it #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #text posts #malistaire drake