#and your feelings are real too but them being hurt by something not done explicitly TO you is NOT a justification for uh. jack shit

[thatlittledandere]

Ao3 antis are so fucking funny honestly "this 30-year-old (a crime in and of itself) wrote an imaginary story where imaginary bad things happen to my imaginary blorbo but when I told them to die a violent death I got flagged for harassment??" Honey I know being 16 does fucky things to your brain but do you hear yourself

#venlapost #'what do you MEAN threatening a real person is unacceptable but this story with a rape scene isn't' #honey do you remember looney toones those fuckers literally exploded and the writers are still walking free #and the incest fic on ao3 is read by a couple thousand people at best it's not going to have a big cultural impact #i KNOW deku feels more real to you because you are familiar with his character and the author is a screenname but #the author is real and deku isn't #and your feelings are real too but them being hurt by something not done explicitly TO you is NOT a justification for uh. jack shit

[its-time-to-write]

i think we could do it if we tried

So I misread a prompt, and didn’t realize until halfway through the fic. This was the result and it ended up being weirdly personal? If you hate it or think it’s unrealistic, I know, it’s just wishful thinking, ok?😭

i think we could do it if we tried

You’re sure Jamie’s expression will be burned into your mind forever. After all, you’re the one who put it there. 

“I don’t know why I’m crying,” you say, tears streaming down your face, “I’m the one who’s breaking up with you.”

Jamie just laughs wetly. “Not your fault, though, is it?”

That just makes you cry harder. 

You and Jamie had been friends for a long time, and he’d been in love with you forever. You didn’t return the feeling until you turned eighteen. It was on your birthday, actually. He had insisted on wearing a birthday hat all day, despite that fact that he was at training and you were at home, so you didn’t see each other until the end of the day. Something about seeing the sparkly cone on his head did something to your heart, and there it was; you loved him. 

You suppose the love was always there, lying dormant, but now it had arisen. It took you a week to muster up the courage to tell him, but you did and now it felt like the world made sense. 

Now, a month later, you’re breaking up with him. 

Jamie had been playing football for a while now, and he was really, really good. You were beginning your studies as an undergrad and had your life mapped out until grad school. He was moving away soon and you were leaving tomorrow, but that wasn’t the reason you were breaking up. 

It’s because your parents didn’t approve. 

“I can’t make them understand,” you tell Jamie, willing yourself not to cry. “And… I know I’m eighteen, but they’re paying for university. They said they’d pay all the way through grad school, and I can’t afford it on my own.”

Jamie nods and wipes his eyes with the back of his hand. 

“God, it’s fuckin’ shitty, ain’t it?” he says. “Me ‘n you, finally figuring it out too late.”

You can only nod and sniff. Your parents told you that Jamie was a good friend, but nothing more. 

“You’re only projecting feelings onto him because you know he likes you,” your mum had said. “And besides, he plays football. Can’t support a family on that, can you?”

Any protests you made fell on deaf ears. Your parents never explicitly said they’d pull their financial support, but it was hinted. It hung in the air, poisoning the atmosphere in the house. Your mother’s displeasure saturated the building, affecting everyone inside. 

So here you are, standing in the dim light of Jamie’s mum’s porch, breaking up with him at 10pm. 

He knew it was coming, too. 

“Y’know I’d never want you to put your life on hold for me, yeah?” he’d said two days earlier. 

You just nodded.

“I’ve been thinking about quitting football,” he continued, “Get a real job, stay closer.”

You had protested vehemently. He loved football, and he was good, like really good, and how could you ask him to give it up?

So yeah, it wasn’t a total blindside. 

Still hurt, though. 

You stood there, a long time, without speaking. You were memorizing each other’s faces and the way it felt being together for the last time. 

There’s a light on in Georgie’s room, and you wonder if she’ll still love you despite the fact you broke her baby’s heart. 

Jamie finally breaks the silence. “You should go,” he says, “before your parents figure out you’re gone.”

You don’t trust yourself to speak, so you just reach out and squeeze his hand. He pulls you in for a hug, the tightest one you’ve ever received, and you never want to let go. But you do. 

You fight the urge to say I’ll wait for you. I’ll find you when I’m done with school. We’ll make it work. But you don’t want to give him false hope. You don’t want to hurt him more than you already have. 

So instead, you whisper “I love you, Jamie Tartt,” and force yourself to walk away. 

— 

That was six years ago. You pushed yourself through school, got out with your BA in three and a half years, and scraped through your MA in two. There were times it felt a little like hell, but you persevered. 

You’re pretty sure the worst moment was during your third year, when your roommate, a football aficionado, started talking about Man City’s hotshot new player.  

“Oh my god, he’s like, so fucking sexy. The things he does on the pitch… he’s like, revolutionized the game.”

“Hm,” you say noncommittally, lost in a textbook. 

“Yeah, heard he’s a bit of a prick though. Grew up in Manchester, and he’s about our age. D’you reckon you knew him?”

“What?” you say, finally lifting your eyes from the page. “I didn’t grow up in Manchester, just lived there when I was a teenager.”

Your roommate shrugs. “Did you know a ‘Jamie Tartt?’ Dating Keeley Jones?”

And there it was. The worst moment of your whole university career. 

You turn back to your book in order to hide your face. “Doesn’t sound familiar,” you say, and your roommate doesn’t push it. She’s too busy telling you how Jamie and Keeley are the hottest, most perfect couple she’s ever seen. 

You’re past that now. It still feels like a stabbing pain every time you hear his name or see his face on a screen, but for the most part, you’ve shut down that part of your brain. 

You might have shut it down a little too successfully. 

In the last six years, you’ve been in exactly two relationships. Both short-lived, both leaving you with a sense of apathy. 

But, your parents approved of both of them. Didn’t matter that they were shallow, self-absorbed dickheads; “He’s cute and has a good job!” your mum had said, oblivious to the fact that she was replaying the exact same pitch to you from before. 

You had felt a rush of relief when the news hit that Jamie and Keeley had broken up. You hated hearing about all his escapades, and how much he hurt her. It made your heart ache, knowing he was burying himself in his prickish attitude the same way you were burying yourself in yours. 

Well, maybe that’s too harsh. You aren’t a prick per se, you’re just… cold. Emotionless. You felt very little this days, because every time you felt the tiniest bit of anything, everything threatened to overwhelm you. 

After school, you just… kept moving. No sense in going home, you loved your family but they made you feel like you were drowning. And you couldn’t make yourself go back to Manchester. 

Georgie called you from time to time, checking up on you. Turns out she didn’t hate you. She was actually rather worried. She never, ever mentioned Jamie. 

“You can’t just stop living life, love,” she had said one time. “That’s all it is: love and loss. You just keep moving forward.”

You took her advice literally, securing a good job that allowed you to work remotely. You moved to the east side of London, West Ham, but were never at your flat longer than a week. After all, you were hot and had a good job. Why not travel? You had no strings keeping you anywhere. 

Now you’re back in West Ham for two weeks, getting ready to go to Barcelona. A friend has a timeshare that she can’t make it to, so you volunteered to go. After all, it’s better to be apathetic in Barcelona than it is in West Ham, right?

Whatever the case, you’re here for much longer than you’d like to be, but you’re going to make the best of it. You have a friend from uni who lives near you, so you’re going out tonight. She wants to go to some upscale restaurant a couple minutes from your flat with a few other girls, and you decide that you’d rather not be alone tonight.

You don’t mention that it’s your birthday. You stopped celebrating them at nineteen.

Your hair and makeup are done, you’ve put together an appropriate fancy-dinner outfit, and you’d say you’re looking classy. You grab your bag and head out the door.

It’s only a ten-minute walk, and there are all kinds of people out. You wonder why, then remember it’s Saturday. That explains it. 

There’s an especially rowdy bunch of guys up ahead, seemingly corralled by a middle-aged man with a mustache. As you draw closer, you hear his accent. American, specifically mid-Western. You breeze by them, catching snatches of their conversations and a mix of accents.

Your ear tunes into someone saying, “…not what really happened,” with an accent that reminds you so much of Jamie’s, you find yourself rooted to your spot in the sidewalk, turning around to confirm that it is not, in fact, him.

You make eye contact with the middle-aged mustached man, who smiles at you and shrugs. “Footballers. What a rowdy bunch,” he says, “Wonder where their coach’s at?”

You surmise by his jocular tone that he’s their coach.

You give him a small smile and he comes over to you. Your feet still won’t move, because you haven’t confirmed that the voice was not Jamie. Or maybe because this man is a gaffer, and you want him to say something, anything about possibly knowing Jamie Tartt.

“I’m Ted,” he says, sticking out his hand.

You shake it and give him your name. At this point, his team have noticed that their coach is talking to someone new, and they descend like a flock of curious children.

There’s a chorus of hellos and one hola, but it’s all a little lost because all you can hear is one soft, “hey.”

“Hi,” you breathe. 

One look into Jamie Tartt’s blue eyes and you’re a goner, even after six years.

Ted looks from you to Jamie. “Oh, do y’all know each other? Jamie, why didn’t you say something?”

“Dunno,” Jamie says, keeping his eyes on you.

Ted, great man that he is, assesses the situation with alarming perception.

“Alright boys, why don’t we let Jamie catch up with his lady-friend, and we’ll just text him where we end up, sound good?” 

It does not sound good to them, because they can tell something interesting is about to happen, but Ted and another bearded American herd them away and down the street, leaving you and Jamie alone on the sidewalk.

“How you been?” he asks, looking awkward as you feel.

“I’ve been…” what word is there to describe how you’ve been? You settle for a shrug.

He nods and huffs out a single chuckle. “Yeah, that about sums it up, don’t it?”

“What about you?” you ask, reaching out to lightly tap his arm. “Heard you were some hotshot footballer.”

Jamie imitates your shrug. “Heard you were some hotshot something or the other.”

You crack a small smile at that. “Georgie tell you?”

“Yeah,” Jamie says, “Felt the need to keep me updated. Don’t fuckin’ know why though.”

That hurts a little bit. This is a mistake, you think. You begin to realize, perhaps for the first time, that your pining after him was pointless. And one-sided.

That is, until Jamie says so softly you almost miss it, “Happy birthday, by the way.”

There it is. 

You open your mouth to say, I love you, but what comes out instead is, “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” Jamie asks in surprise.

“I’m just… sorry. For everything. For walking away. I don’t know, I feel like I should have fought it or something… I think about you all the time. I wish that I would’ve done something different, I guess. I know I can’t change it, but…” you shrug helplessly. 

Jamie just looks at you, head tilted. 

You huff out an awkward laugh. “Anyway. I should probably go. Meeting a bunch of girls for drinks and dinner.”

“You hate that shit,” Jamie says, and it comes out the exact same way he would have said it six years ago. Like he’s comfortable with you, like he knows every single tick in your brain.

“I do,” you agree ruefully. “Just couldn’t get out of it, I guess. Didn’t have a good excuse.”

“Go out with me,” Jamie suggests, impulsively. But then, he was never one for forethought. 

Your mouth opens to decline, then shuts.

“You’re done with school, yeah?” Jamie continues, “Mum said you haven’t been home in ages. Said she knows more about you than your parents. What if… what if we gave it another go? We’re fuckin’ adults, ain’t we? Let’s just fucking try.”

He’s looking at you, so full of anxious hope that it makes you want to cry. You can feel a few tears fighting their way forward.

“Jamie,” you say, “Jamie I don’t know. I mean- I hurt you. I knew what I was doing would hurt you and I did it anyway. I could hurt you again.”

Jamie replies, “Weren’t your fault though, was it?” and you’re taken back so vividly to that front porch.

You look at him, really look at him for the first time in six years. He’s older, you realize, and you think that he must think something similar about you. He’s calmer, almost- gentler? Still the same Jamie though, with the blonde highlights and the slit in his eyebrow. Outrageous sense of fashion, one that is no longer dulled by the ominous presence of his father. He’s more sure of himself, you think, and you realize you’re more sure too.

There isn’t anything hanging over your head threatening to take your livelihood away.

It’s poetic, really. You, him, in the dim streetlight. Deciding to begin again exactly six years after it ended.

“Jamie,” you say again, because you love the way his name feels on your lips, “I didn’t ever stop loving you. I don’t ever want to stop loving you.”

He’s taken a step closer, and there’s mere centimeters between you. 

“Y’know I’d never want you to put your life on hold for me, right?” you whisper, “Been thinking about stopping traveling. Maybe settle down closer, focus on my job more.”

Jamie smiles. “Go out with me,” he says. “Skip your dinner. You’d have a shit time, anyway.”

You smile back and reach out for his hand. It still fits perfectly in yours. Maybe even better.

“I would love to.”

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x you #jamie tartt #ted lasso

[prince-liest]

Don't mind me getting on my soapbox for a moment... a lot of this musing is admittedly for the sake of my own processing of this topic, re: aroaceness. Read at your own peril! <3

I'm generally a very "ship and let ship" kind of person, but I think I would definitely append a little caveat of, like, "As long as you're not being actively invalidating and detrimental to others" to that. Which is a delightfully vague statement that can be interpreted practically any way, I know, hahaha.

In the case of this particular post I've just been thinking about how, like... seeing an aroace character like Alastor get written into dozens upon dozens of PWPs (including ones that don't even touch on the subject of his aceness at all) is really not something that I personally find to be hurtful or offensive. It's just smut for the sake of smut, of a character people want to see awful, sexy things done to (or doing). Valid! I vibe with you! More people should just write the PWPs they want to see in the world!

But on the other hand, I've several times seen this very particular type of art (usually it's a comic, but admittedly I haven't been reading very many Hazbin Hotel fics so maybe it's there, too) where Alastor is slotted into the "methinks the lady doth protest too much" trope. As in, he's expressing strong feelings about a character (usually Vox or Lucifer, sometimes Angel Dust) to someone, probably Rosie, and the person he's confiding to is some variant of, "Oh, silly Alastor, you're obviously in love!" And then he denies it, says that the very idea disgusts him, and the character titters to themselves about how he's so naive in the matters of romance or whatever.

And it's, like.

The "strong feelings" in question are almost always frustration/annoyance/disgust, and him being like, "Nnnno, I just hate his person" is treated like a silly and naive misunderstanding of his own feelings because obviously he's in love. Please imagine that Alastor was a female character who was established to be a lesbian. Now examine how that suddenly makes this scene feel.

(Also, Rosie being the go-to for this is a little frustrating when she's the one who, in canon, explicitly says that she wouldn't make that assumption of him.)

There's such a chasm of difference between how I see people wanting to ship Alastor for reasons of "I just want to!" vs folks who engage with him being aroace in ways that are infantilizing and invalidating. There are so many people out there - not just aro/ace people, but anyone who's not exclusively into the standard type of person they should be into at the time society deems they should be into them, which is most queer people and even many cishet folks - that have been told that exact kind of thing in real life. It reads like something out of a compulsory heterosexuality guidebook, and it actively makes it harder to leave the closet or even realize that you're in one at all.

So I guess it just feels frustrating to see it get made into a punchline, especially by folks who are shipping queer ships. I genuinely can't wait until fandom society advances to the point of consistently treating aro/acespec folks as queer instead of Queer Lite (TM), because let me tell you, ime the comphet experience and the amato/allonormativity experience are in fact nigh-identical except for how they're treated within online communities. There's a reason the pan -> gay -> ace pipeline is a thing.

But, hey! We're already doing way better than we were in 2012!

#personal #aro #ace #aroace #long post #sexuality #please don't come to this post talking about “but gray ace/demi” because I truly don't want to write the requisite 8 paragraph response #just trust me that I know and I don't think it contradicts the specific point I'm making #this is a personal musing on my personal blog because I'm too lazy to separate personal and fandom blogs unu #hazbin hotel #alastor

[multifandomfanficss]

It’s About Time

Ed Nygma/The Riddler x Reader

Prompt: Ed offers to help you with time management when you tell him you’re stressed at work. Your conversation is interrupted by an attack on the GCPD by the Maniax.

Warnings: Mentions of murder, cannibalism, r*pists, abuse, and general graphic violence. Gotham typical violence. Mental health struggles. Sensory issues and meltdowns common with autism. Panic. Near death experiences. Claustrophobia. References to being buried alive. Nightmares.

A/N: I’m rewatching Gotham and I didn’t realize the missed potential for hurt/comfort the first time I watched this show 7 years ago. My work load has been really heavy lately, but this show broke me out of my writers block and I made time for the writing bug. This takes place in the middle of Ed’s Riddler arc. He hasn’t fully become the Riddler yet, but he has already made his first kill. The reader has qualities of an autistic person, but is not explicitly said to be autistic. I accidentally code a lot of my characters to be autistic because I am, but this was more intentional to reflect Ed’s autistic coding. Feel free to read into it or not! You don’t have to be autistic to read and hopefully enjoy this! Crossposted on my AO3 adriansglasses.

“I’ve been so stressed lately.” You sigh. “It’s like I can’t get anything done that I actually need to get done.” You stand in the hallway of the precinct talking to your friend Ed. You were stressing about this case and Jim Gordon was making you go through hundreds of old files for him. You were never part of the real action, but the horrifying crime scene photos and evidence you had to pull through everyday was taking a toll on you. Gordon’s time crunches never helped either. You understood that lives were often on the line, but that didn’t make it any easier.

“What can some people never get enough of and others say is too much? What has the ability to fly when having fun or is stuck completely frozen when you need it to move?” He smiles. You stare at him blankly. You had not been getting enough sleep. You loved hearing his riddles, but you were never the best at giving him the answers. It was so hard for your mind to keep track of it all. “Do you give up?” He asks.

“My brain just isn’t braining right now.” You laugh. “What’s the answer?”

“Time.” He beams, happy with himself. “You should try to implement a better time management plan. You look tired all the time. It’s like you’re not even sleeping.”

“Thanks, Ed.” You give a dry laugh.

“You know what I mean.” You nod in an agreement with him. “You might be the only person who usually knows what I mean.” He says, fiddling with his fingers and the buttons on his coat.

He was right. Nobody quite seemed to get him, but nobody quite seemed to get you either. You had always felt this odd draw to him that you could never quite explain. Truthfully you think you have feelings for him, but you always bury them. He saw you as a friend and he really needed a friend. Besides he had been pinning over Kristen since before you even got to the precinct. You had mixed feelings towards her. On one hand you felt bad for her. She was always getting mixed up with shitty boyfriends who treated her poorly, but on the other hand she had a mean streak. You never liked how she treated Ed. It was like he wasn’t a person with feelings to her and that made you so angry.

“You’re right. I haven’t been sleeping.” You tell him.

“Why is that?” He asks.

“We live in Gotham. With the terrifying shit we see everyday, I don’t know how anyone sleeps.”

“Are you having nightmares again?” He asks, his face painted with concern.

“It’s fine. It’s just work stress. It’s just this case. I’m fine.” You smile. It wasn’t a real smile. Your smiles always came so naturally around Ed that he knew something was off. He was about to press when you heard gunshots coming from down the hall. Your body immediately froze like a dear in headlights in the middle of the hallway.

You’ve had violent people in the precinct before and it always made you nervous, but this was different. The Maniax were on the loose and you knew they were too unhinged to care about survivors or bargains. With Jerome Valeska at the helm, along side cannibals, rapists, and murderers you were terrified. They’d escaped from Arkham days ago and already managed to murder dozens of people. This was far too close to the action for you, as you heard Jerome’s laugh bellowing down the hall from the bullpen; a laugh you remembered from one of your early cases at the precinct. You had felt bad for him and tried to help him when his mother died. You will never forget the laugh he let out when Jim realized he wasn’t as innocent as you’d thought. It ran a chill through your spine.

Everything started moving too fast when you realized you were being pulled down the hall quickly. Once you realized you were holding hands, you tightly grasped Ed’s hand, not wanting to be separated from him. He brings you further down the hall into the ME’s lab.

“W-where are we going?” You stutter. It’s like your mouth can’t keep up with your racing mind.

“Do you trust me?” He looks at you trying to stay calm.

“Ed, what are you doing?” You’re panicking. He can tell. It’s not hard to tell, as your hands fidget and your breathing is heavy. You’re trying to stay calm.

“(Y/N), I need you to trust me.” He places his hands on your shoulders in an effort to ground you with the pressure. You close your eyes and nod, hesitantly. You do trust him.

Ed runs to the cold lockers and opens one, checking to see if it’s empty. He finds a dead body inside. You cringe. Seeing bodies is rare for you and you’re still getting used to it.

“Oh dear… okay… second times the charm…” He mumbles to himself trying to find an empty locker. “Bingo!” He smiles, finding an empty one. The wheels start to turn in your head.

“No! I’m not getting in there!” Your panic increases. Ed shushes you.

“This is our best chance. I promise I’ll let you out as soon as I can.”

“We won’t be together?” Your eyes start to burn. You try to keep back tears. You’re shaking.

“We won’t both fit in the same one. I’m gonna go in the one above you-“

“No no please I- I don’t wanna be by myself! Please don’t leave me!” You cut him off and beg him. Ed awkwardly rubs his thumbs across your shoulders where he places his hands again, still trying to ground you. It’s awkward, but it’s still somewhat calming.

“I’m not leaving you. I would never leave you. I’ll be right next to you the whole time. I promise. I need you to trust me.” You’re not sure if it’s because it’s life or death, or if it’s because it’s Ed, but you reluctantly let him help your shaking body into the mortuary cabinet. When it comes time to let go of his hand and close the cabinet, you don’t want to. Despite quickly running out of time, he knows he needs to be patient. He knows how hard this is for you. He’s always known you’re a bit claustrophobic. He had no idea one of your worst fears was being buried alive. Being stuck in a cold locker wasn’t too far from either of those things. He can hear footsteps far down the hall. The Maniax were never subtle. He kisses the hand he’s holding quickly before closing your locker and climbing into his own. You were surprised by the kiss, but you couldn’t think about that right now and what it could have meant. Your mind couldn’t keep up. He had to leave his own locker unlocked, unable to properly close it from the inside, but he locked yours to make it look more convincing.

When Ed heard you cry, he began to whisper, hoping he could be loud enough for you to hear, but quiet enough for the Maniax to not notice. “It’s okay, (Y/N). I’m still here.” It was enough to quiet your sobs. Tears silently streamed down your cheeks. Ed’s voice had a certain gentleness to it when he spoke to you. He was being especially gentle now. You had seen him angry, upset, anxious, energetic, but his calm voice was reserved for you. Even in this moment when he was admittedly not very calm, he was trying his best to mask his own fears to keep you safe.

You always reserved parts of yourself for each other; parts of yourselves that the other person enabled you to be. You were never as bold as you wanted to be, but when people were rude to Ed you stuck up for him. He brought out a more confident version of you. For Ed, he knew you struggled with staying calm when you were stressed, upset, anxious or scared, even when you were happy. All of your emotions were so big and you rarely knew how to contain them. He tried to stay calm because he knew you saw him as a calming person in your life. He liked being your hero when everyone else only saw him as a weak, odd, nuisance. He also liked that he could read you and that you were honest with him. He trusted you and it helped keep the voice in his head at bay. He didn’t have to question himself with you. He didn’t have to take advice from the voice in his head.

You tried to keep your meltdown as quiet as possible when you heard footsteps approach. They were heavy, not ones you recognized. You knew it had to be one of the Maniax, probably the cannibal. You tried to make your breath as quiet as possible. After what you assume was a poor sweep of the room, the man leaves.

After what seems like hours of being trapped in a corpse you finally hear sirens and then chatter. You hear Ed climb out of the locker above you. He opens your locker and you let out an audible sob.

“I think they’ve gone.” He says, pulling out the drawer to let your body get some much needed air. You start gasping and sobbing, shaking on the drawer of the mortuary cabinet. Your body jolts up. You just want to get away from the locker.

“You’re okay! You’re okay!” Ed catches your body, as your start to fall from the drawer to the floor. You sit on the floor and cling to him, sobbing. At first awkward, he runs his hand along your back, trying to sooth you with the repetitive motion.

“I felt like I was dead- like- like I was gonna get buried alive-“ You gasp for air, sobbing between your words. Ed shushes you.

“We’re okay. They’re gone.” He promises.

You hear fast approaching footsteps. Your brain is moving too fast to decide if the footsteps are familiar or not. You just bury yourself further into Ed’s chest.

“Detective Gordon is here.” He informs you and you relax only slightly.

“Nygma, are they okay?” Jim asks.

“No mortal wounds, they’re just a bit shaken up.” He lets him know.

“You two should probably still get checked out. I need to finish scanning the building for everyone else. So far we’ve got 9 cops dead in the bullpen and… and the commissioner is dead.” He says. It’s almost like you hear Jim, but you don’t. Your mind can’t keep up with anything that’s happening.

After a while you find yourself sitting, waiting for Lee to check you out. Ed had been pulled away for a few minutes to do his job. He didn’t want to leave you, but you assured him you were fine. You didn’t feel fine, but you knew they needed him. As long as you could see him on the other side of the bullpen, you were reluctant, but okay with him stepping away. He left his jacket draped around your shoulders. It helped to be surround by his smell and warmth.

When it was time to go home, Ed guided you to his car. You hadn’t spoken much, but at least you’d finally stopped crying. The car ride was quiet. The only thing that filled the air was Ed’s occasional hum with the radio. Neither of you quite knew what to say. It was a bit ironic considering usually nobody could ever get you two to shut up. You didn’t speak up until he turned onto your street.

“I don’t want to go home.” You said quietly, feeling the panic rise again at the thought of being alone at home again.

“That’s understandable. Would you like to stay at my place?” He asks. You nod, silently. He flicks his turn signal and starts the drive to his place.

“Welcome to Château Nygma.” He smiles, turning on the light. You still have his jacket wrapped around your shoulders. Despite the terror you’ve been through today, his smile is refreshing. You don’t question how he can stay so seemingly sane in times like these, but you’re just glad somebody is. You need that. Maybe you should have questioned it, but you didn’t. He has a nice apartment. It’s not too big. Why would it be for a man who lived by himself? It’s just the right size with cool windows and a comfortable setup.

“Do you want something to eat? I’m a good cook.” He smiles. You don’t know how he can continue to smile, but you’re glad. It starts to make you feel safer. It’s nice to be in a locked apartment with just you and Ed. It’s nice to be in a quiet, secluded place, but not feel alone. It’s far better than sitting on your bed, scared of any serial killers that could be hiding underneath the frame and jumping at any people you hear in the stairwell of your apartment, with an open case file sitting next to you, worried the killers you’re reading about could be onto you any second. Today was a very close call. Too close.

“If you’re not sure, that’s okay too.” He continues, noticing you’re deep in thought.

“Oh…uh yeah… I’m not sure what I want… It’s like my body needs things, but I’m just a little bit too overwhelmed to figure it out.” You look down, shyly.

“Do you want to just sit? I can put on some music?” He questions referencing the record player with his hands.

“That sounds okay. I think I can do that.” You nod. He puts on some quiet music, not too loud to overstimulate you and you make your way to the couch. He brings you a glass of water.

“I can imagine it might be hard for you to have an appetite given your increased levels of adrenaline today, but you should at least drink this.” You take the water from him and begin to sip it. You didn’t realize how nice cold water could feel. You drink it quickly, before setting the glass down.

“Thank you.”

Ed sits down and you gravitate towards him.

“How do you do it?” You ask.

“How do I do what?” He looks for clarification.

“Your job. There’s so much death everywhere.”

“I don’t know. I just sort of do. Honestly I think it’s fascinating…” He pauses, looking away from you. “Sorry. That probably sounds weird.”

“It does, but that’s okay. I like the fact that you’re different and you’re honest. It’s comforting. You’re a better man than all of those crooked cops walking around beating up women and mobsters alike.”

“You think so?” He asks.

“Yeah, I do.” You smile. This time it’s a real smile. Ed smiles too. It’s nice to know after everything he’s done for you to make you comfortable, you can say something to make him feel better.

“I’m sorry all of this has been so awful for you.” He says.

“I know we’re doing good and it’s important to do good in a world of so much bad, but sometimes I just wish nobody had to do it. I can’t even fathom what would make somebody what kill another person. Maybe out of necessity, but it scares me that people actually enjoy it.”

“Yeah.” Ed shifts uncomfortably. You think he must agree with you and that’s why he’s unconformable. You don’t know that he killed Officer Doherty for abusing Kristen just over a month ago.

The two of you talk for quite some time until you end up falling asleep next to him on the couch. He doesn’t mind when you fall into his lap. He lets you sleep, smiling down at you. He didn’t dare move. He didn’t want to wake you. He was afraid of breathing too deeply and shifting too much underneath you. He eventually falls asleep sitting up with you still in his lap.

Everything is peaceful until you shoot up screaming, in a cold sweat. You’ve had another nightmare. This time is different. You’re disoriented. You don’t know where you are. You feel hands touching you.

“(Y/N), it’s me! It’s Ed! You had another nightmare.” You look at his face to see him distraught, unsure of what to do. Your tossing and turning had woken him up. He was awake only seconds before you.

Your eyes begin to well with tears. “I just want it to stop. When will all of this stop?” You cry.

“When will what stop?” He asks.

“Everything! I just want to stop feeling like this. I want to stop being afraid. I should be used to the job by now.”

“Maybe you just need more time to get used to it! I know we talked about time management earlier. I can help you with your schedule.” He offers.

“I don’t want to manage my time. I just want it to freeze. I just wish time would freeze so I could just breathe and catch up!”

Ed looks at you defeated. He doesn’t know what to say. He likes riddles because riddles always have answers. He doesn’t know what to do when there’s a problem with no solution.

“I’m sorry.” He settles with saying. “Would a hug help?” He’s just grasping at anything he’s seen people do when trying to comfort other people with problems and no solutions.

“Yes.” You say quietly, burying your head in his chest. Despite being the one to offer the hug, he’s a little awkward at first. He eventually settles in.

“Is this helping?” He asks.

“Yes.” You tell him. Of course, Ed being who he is, even now he’s still looking for a solution. He doesn’t realize he may be the solution, or at least someone to help make the problem smaller. “You always help.” You add.

“I’m sure most of our coworkers would disagree.” He laughs.

“I never thanked you for earlier today.” You say quietly.

“It was nothing.” He smiles.

“No, Ed. Keeping me safe in a life or death situation isn’t nothing.”

“I’m sure anyone would have done it.” He argues.

“No, they wouldn’t have.” You tell him.

“I’ll always protect you.” He pulls you closer, shifting awkwardly underneath you. “You know… my apartment is always open if you want to sleep with me- I- I mean sleep with me in attendance- I- I mean sleep with each other- I- I mean near each other- you know! In case you have nightmares!”

“I might just have to take you up on that. This is the first night I’ve felt okay enough to be able to maybe go back to sleep afterwards.” You smile, trying not to laugh. You don’t want him to think you’re making fun of him. Truthfully you think he’s sweet and funny.

“You should go back to sleep and since I didn’t get to make you dinner I’ll be making you the best breakfast of your life tomorrow.” He beams.

“You better.” You snuggle into him. Ed is too awkward to suggest you go lay in his bed tonight and you’re too tired to care. You spend the rest of the night on the couch together. You can save the bed for tomorrow night. You know when you wake up in the morning you’ll be coming back. It was the most sleep you’ve gotten in weeks.

Ed wakes up before you and sneaks off the couch to start breakfast. He truthfully was a very good cook. His own sensory issues with food made him very particular about how it’s prepared. You wake up to the smell of something good in the oven. Ed is nowhere to be seen, but you hear him in the bathroom. He’s talking. You knew he often talked to himself, but he sounded like he was talking to someone else. Maybe he was on the phone. You were sure you were hearing one half of a conversation.

“I told you we could trust them. They like me for me. They think I’m a good man.”

#edward nygma #ed nygma #gotham edward nygma #gotham Ed Nygma #the riddler #dc riddler #the riddler dc #cms Ed Nygma #cms riddler #edward nygma x reader #ed nygma x reader #Gotham ed nygma x reader #Gotham edward Nygma x reader #riddler x reader #the riddler x reader #Gotham riddler x reader #gotham riddler #gotham oneshot #gotham fanfiction #gotham imagine #gotham fanfic #gotham #cory michael smith #cory Michael smith Ed Nygma #cory Michael smith Gotham #cory Michael smith riddler

[mdhwrites]

Honestly It's quite disrespectful and insulting, how Dana cared more about her beef with Disney than making a good show for the fans who supported her, some even financially. I've had it with her extreme fans raging to people when she's criticized for her obvious lack of care on S3 (the story in general), spamming and blaming on Disney and the shortening. Now that's revealed it wasn't Disney's fault for "ruining S3" since there was no S3 to begin with, that just puts more salt on the wound.

And lying about having plans for S3, what was that about? Stirring more hate on Disney? I find that pitiful and pathetic. If fans are gonna get mad at her from this revelation they have the right to do so. Toh should've stayed in the drafts or be written as a freelanche comic

Edit: I do think this person is too harsh on Dana as a person. I'm curious even what they mean by financial support from her fans (her charity livestreams? Unless she does those more often for personal gain but those people would likely donate anyways as just fans of the show) but as I go into below, I do agree that her unprofessionalism is a real problem and that with the fandom she somewhat helped rile up, it makes it frustrating to learn that a lot of this was on vapor. Not lies, but just... Not nearly as much solid foundation as we were led to believe. There is a lot to be said about how Dana, from my understanding, has been one of the most available leads on a show... Period? At bare minimum, for modern cartoons. Like others will talk but Dana was extremely candid. In fact, it feels like she probably learned some lessons from it because the blaming Disney stuff actually went DOWN as the show progressed. Like at least now it's "I wish I could have done more things," rather than, I dunno, just straight up trying to say they're why episodes you're not proud/ of aren't as well regarded didn't turn out.

Which she did.

With S1A.

Before SEASON TWO was out.

Like... You just shit talked literally half of the content that is out for your show and threw your publisher under the process. Why do I think that might not have been received well?

And when I was biggest in the fandom, around the time the news of the shortening happened, you heard a LOT of different explanations from Dana, like it was one executive who made the call or how TOH wasn't a 'part of Disney's brand' or the like. When the Florida stuff came out with Disney, she pretty explicitly called Disney out for it (which is fine and I approve) but then went on to insinuate that it was hard for her to believe that the show had been cancelled for any reason besides representation, a move I DON'T approve of and makes ZERO sense with how they got to do so much more gay shit in S2B and even add new elements like confirming Masha was they/them or confirming Luz being Bi on screen in Thanks to Them. It's not a great look for a director, especially during the times these statements were coming out.

Being unprofessional admittedly doesn't make her a bad person but like... Yeah, I get upset thinking about the contradictions here too. That even in the same post Hoot that she has to admit that the shortening pushed them creatively and they had no real plans, she's still talking like she had plans. Like there was something to be missed when... No. Not for the STORY. Just your bucket of ideas for a perpetual series.

It leans into the idea that saying you were going to do X means you would have done it perfectly. That Dana doesn't understand that the only perfect work is the one never done. She's fine with being remembered for what wasn't there if it means being remembered better. As a creator myself who struggles with putting things to the page... I don't know. It hurts to some extent.

Which just a small update: I've been having real trouble focusing the past couple days. My head is not on well right now. It's why these are being a bit more emotional and late night rather than my normal posts in the morning because that's just how I've felt like doing it. Hope you're all taking care of yourselves and see you next tale.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#the owl house criticism #toh critical #toh #the owl house

[teaveetamer]

Cap: *writes a blatantly sexist, racist, homophobic fic that is immensely popular and influential in the fandom and that many people have explicitly said made them feel uncomfortable when reading it*

Raxis: he's completely innocent everyone who says he ever did anything wrong are just hysterical liars with victim complexes

Moonlitboar: *says that they wanted Lambert to be more morally ambiguous and said they thought Sitri was happy in untagged posts that literally maybe a dozen people max ever saw*

Raxis: THEY DESERVED TO GET CANCELED THEY FUCKED AROUND AMD FOUND OUT THEY’RE AN ASSHOLE but i never did anything to them but i know who did but i won't tell anyone who that is BUT I'M COMPLETELY UNINVOLVED i just know exactly who is involved in this TOTALLY JUSTIFIED C A N C E L A T I O N (and totally not harassment because harassment is bad but cancelation to the point of harassment is fine)

LITERALLY what was the game plan here. His own logic makes it sound like he's actually completely down with Cap getting "canceled" AND he sounds like a blatant liar. Why couldn't he just shut his mouth for once

From the very beginning, no one on Tumblr has done anything that would break his personal definition of "normal" fandom participation. We're "harassing" Cap for talking about his fic and meta posts, but if you bring up Raxy's aggressive disregard for the block button, and how he disregards people directly asking him to leave them alone, he will be the FIRST to say "you put it on the internet so you have no right to be upset about me criticizing your dumbass takes".

He will stomp his feet and throw a tantrum if you say anything even remotely critical of Cap's fic's actual racist, sexist, and homophobic undertones, but Moonlit had one milquetoast opinion about Sitri and Lambert and they "deserve" a brutal cancellation. By his logic Cap should have been cancelled about a thousand times over by now; I'm giving him one cancellation for every use of "girls" to refer to grown women.

He will consistently justify his mistreatment of people with "but someone bullied Cap first" even if the person he's literally harassing has had nothing to do with Cap ever, but if you bring up what he demonstrably did to Moonlitboar it's "how dare you, you shouldn't 'mistreat' me for this thing I demonstrably did and even if I did do it then it wasn't my fault because they deserved it :/"

The truth of the matter is that Raxy doesn't give a shit. His "rules" for engagement are literally just "I should be allowed to react however I want whenever my feelings are hurt, and you should only be allowed to react in a way that doesn't hurt my feelings." Except this man is quite possibly the most fragile human being I have ever encountered and everything hurts his feelings. He genuinely thinks saying "I think Sitri lived a good life" is equivalent in hurtfulness to "I think it's okay to make genocide 'jokes' on your posts". Because the Sitri thing hurt his poor feelings, but well if someone tells me it's funny to remind me that my family died in the holocaust it's not his feelings getting hurt, so who gives a shit, just don't make him look too bad and he doesn't care. I wish I were kidding but that was LITERALLY his primary concern in that situation.

Not "hey talking about how genocide is cool is fucked up" or "hey maybe stop telling the woman who just told you that her family was impacted by the Holocaust that genocide is really funny and something to joke about"

Nope, it's "shut up you're making us look bad, and look now you woke Nilsh up! Don't you know I worked so hard to harass him into leaving social media!"

Like be for fucking real dude, you aren't slick. I can sum up everything you need to know about this guy's attitude in two images:

His logic looks like a mess of spaghetti because it is. Because he works backward from a conclusion ("I should be allowed to do whatever I want and no one should be allowed to do anything I don't like") and he inserts justifications as he goes, with no regard for whether or not it actually makes sense. He went from "Moonlit deserved it because they had bad takes" to "Moonlit was actually harassing me" to "I didn't actually do it anyway" to "I know exactly who did it but I won't say but it wasn't that bad" to now, apparently, "there's a conspiracy against me". He just relies on no one looking closely enough at him to notice the clear pattern. If someone does suss it out he tries to harass them into shutting up about him or he tries to delete evidence of his past logic and behavior (all the better if the person he's harassing deletes everything too, because then he can just make shit up).

The thing that really gets me is like, just how clearly unable to function he is without someone he absolutely hates to bounce off of. Does he even make original posts, or does he just constantly whine about other people's opinions? Every post I've ever seen from him about 3H, even the ones that aren't reblogs or don't have screenshots included, are like 99% "someone had an opinion I didn't agree with! Allow me to debunk it!" posts. The other 1% are recycled talking points from other people's metas, which he writes like he's got a 5,000 word paper due tomorrow that he hasn't even started and he's trying to see how much "slightly reword the wikipedia entry" he can get away with.

And not even speaking just about Raxy, but this is what pisses me off so bad about certain people in fandom. They feel empowered to harass and bully the genuinely awesome, creative people who actually make things. Those people leave, and then they have the audacity to sit there and whine about how the fandom is dead, no one is making anything, everyone left for greener pastures. They suck the life out of vibrant communities and leave nothing but a hollowed out husk. It happened with a ton of fan artists and authors in 3H, including some I'm friends with, who just had to get the fuck out because of the damage it was causing their mental health. And before he says it, no. Saying "Cap's (a white man) fic has some kinda racist and uncomfy undertones I wish he'd take some criticism to heart and correct that" is not the same thing as stalking someone and sending death threats because they have a different opinion about your favorite character. Holy fuck.

Like hey wanna know why no one wants to talk about 3H anymore? Because of this shit. Because saying "I think Lambert doing Morally Complex things is Morally Complex and therefore interesting" is the kind of opinion that can get you harassed into leaving the fandom entirely.

[fancifulpurposelesslovely]

hello!! I have newly joined the summer sons fandom and if you are in the mood to do some character extrapolation, I’m so curious to know how/if you see Sam and Andrew’s ~dynamic~ progressing post-canon? I read your exchange about the canonical power dynamics between them with another user and I found both of your viewpoints fascinating and insightful so like if it would be fun for you I’d love to hear more! Do you think they ever explicitly acknowledge it between each other? Who do you think brings it up if so? I feel like Andrew would have some complicated shame-adjacent feelings to work through based on what he internalized from Eddie as “appropriate masculinity” if anyone like made him explicitly acknowledge how much he gets out of and enjoys casual submission, but I can’t get a handle on how Sam would think about it? I also feel like Andrew would rather die than bring it up at least in terms of where he is at with his communication skills immediately post-canon. Idk! If it would be interesting for you to think it talk about I would love to hear your thoughts!!

Pretty much one of my favorite topics in general, anon! Just wanted to wait until I had time to sit down at a real keyboard for this.

So I've definitely tried to think about how their relationship and any dynamic might evolve post-canon, and I've got a very quick post on the subject:

And this is largely still my main opinion. I think they're very intelligent and wild and very specifically sheltered in a way that Riley had to break out of for his own sanity a lot earlier than Sam or Andrew did. So Riley would either buy a couple of books online or get some from a library or something, leave them in a bag on Andrew's bed with a note, and hope they never had to speak about Andrew's relationship with Riley's cousin ever again. He might also beg Ethan to jump in and be another source of information on the gays and the intricacies of kink stuff. Not because Ethan is necessarily an expert or involved himself, I think he would just find it interesting and wouldn't have the personal squick about Sam.

(For the record, I think Riley would grab The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy and Paradigms of Power and Negotiating Your Power Dynamic Relationship by Raven Kaldera to start. Or at least, those authors are where I tend to start.)

I do think the almost breaking each other and the general fucking up will be an important part of it all because these boys are not naturally drawn to lengthy verbal communication about their wants, desires, and issues. A lot of it would be done by feel, by vibe, by following body language. Assumptions, wrestling that starts playful and gets to be more, setting up mutual unspoken expectations for each other, then getting pissed/hurt when the other person didn't live up to them 100% of the time because they didn't really know they were supposed to. Sam being slightly too critical of Andrew on a day where Sam is tired and overwhelmed and Andrew is a little fragile, not realizing Andrew would hold onto that for days because Sam "didn't think his opinion mattered that much." (no no that's not personal experience talking, ofc not). Andrew getting in the habit of grabbing Sam refills or new drinks or being the runner for different party chores, then one night just not having the energy or not feeling appreciated and just refusing to do it. Sam and Andrew both not understanding why Sam got so annoyed about it and why their relationship cools down for a couple of days. Little shit like this that's fairly visible from the outside if either of them has a tendency to bitch about it or if you share a living room with them on a regular basis.

I think they do eventually talk about it (this might not be in character for canon and I may have just decided because I want them to, but I'm sticking with it.) I think Andrew would probably read a couple of chapters of the books Riley gave him, panic about it, ignore them for weeks, try again, repeat cycle. I agree that he would have a lot of hang-ups around masculinity and being "like that", but I also think he'd recognize himself and recognize parts of his relationship with Eddie. He'd eventually see that what he and Eddie had been together had been really unhealthy, and maybe it could have been something better and stronger and real, if either of them had ever figured out how to talk about it.

Eventually though, stuff would resonate enough that he'd feel the need to talk to Sam, or he'd be weird about stuff for weeks and Sam would tell him to spill or get over it. So Andrew would bring the books over and try to talk about what Riley had pointed out or what parts of the books were speaking to him, and they'd alternate Andrew being stubborn and recalcitrant and blushy/interested, and Sam would probably laugh it off at first but when that clearly hurt Andrew's feelings, he'd try to hear him out. Sam would chase the blushes and the interest, but he'd probably have complicated feelings about being explicitly asked to lead Andrew in this way. On the one hand I think it would feel like another responsibility that he's being asked to shoulder, but on the other I think he could come to recognize that this is the kind of relationship he wants and that he's wanted to build before without having the words for it. And I think he would recognize what it does for Andrew and what Andrew' submission could mean for him (Sam). Picking up one responsibility in exchange for being able to put down others. Feeling cared for and appreciated even as he cares for Andrew.

I think after talking about it they'd still fuck up sometimes. I think they'd still feel weird about drawn out explicit negotiations and there would be a lot of joking and a little arguing and maybe substances to get through some of those vulnerable conversations. It would take time and patience.

One of my fics gives a pretty explicit example of how I think kink/power would play into their relationship later (be warned, it's entirely a piss kink fic, we blame mark.) Another fic plays a little bit more with the abstract and the subtle undertones.

Did this answer the question? I went all over the place with it. Thanks for giving me reasons to think about it again!!!

#summer sons #writing #andrew blur #sam halse #power dynamics #kink discussion #character exploration #asks #anon

[lesbianrobin]

I know it was a while ago and that tumblr ate your post about it, but why do you think cal uses his real name?

hii sorry it took me a minute to reply ANYWAY.

cal spent five years hiding on bracca without really knowing how many jedi survived or if any did at all. as far as he knew, he could have been the literal only one left in the entire galaxy. he knew that revealing himself meant near certain death. but when prauf fell, he used the force, because above all cal is the kind of person who is incapable of watching something when he could be Doing something. he cares about people and he's never gonna actively choose his own wellbeing over helping others, especially the ones he loves. so he saves prauf at his own risk.

then trilla shows up asking about the jedi. as he has for the past five years, cal stays quiet, and his friend is killed because of it. of course there probably wasn't much of anything cal could have done in that moment, but all the same he learned the lesson that keeping his head down can only go so far, and that he'd rather go down fighting than sit back and watch injustice.

as soon as he meets cere and realizes that he's not alone, he joins her cause almost immediately with few reservations. he and cere explicitly Say that they're done hiding at the start of fallen order, and as survivor shows, while cere has reconsidered things a few years on, cal has stuck steadfast to that philosophy. i think that cal introduces himself with his real name and doesn't try hiding that he's a jedi because, for essentially all of his adolescence, he was alone. he couldn't be honest with anybody about who he was. he didn't know if there were any jedi left. by making himself the empire's most wanted and making no effort to hide his identity or the fact that he's a jedi, cal is doing what he can to let others know that they aren't alone, that people are still fighting, that all is not lost. they don't need to give up and accept their fate. i think cal has decided that the relative safety that comes with laying low or trying to stay incognito just isn't worth the risk that somebody in need may not know that he can help them, or the emotional pain that comes with hiding himself.

on a more personal and subconscious level, i also think that cal needs to be recognized as Cal Kestis Jedi Terrorist because he isn't sure who he is outside of that identity. this is a guy who spent his childhood years as a soldier, his adolescence as a nameless scrapper, and the remainder of his life as a terrorist on the run. all of these distinct phases drilled a need for efficiency into him, because indulgence and slacking off mean death. he clearly has interests in things like machinery and gardening, but he has no real personal goals or desires. he needs to take down the empire. that's all. in survivor, he's driven to compromising his own morals and dipping into the dark side because of bode's betrayal, and i don't think that's even like. because of the betrayal necessarily. so much as the fact that cal has built his whole life around rebellion against the empire, and seeing a fellow jedi who chose to cooperate with the empire breaks something in him. he has this rigid good vs evil dichotomy set up in his head, and everything with dagan and bode and cere in survivor is making him question the path he's chosen in his own life. i think cal was convinced that he's just been Doing What He Must As A Jedi and seeing people take these other paths makes him angry because he feels like. everybody is abandoning him. why is he fighting in the name of the jedi if the jedi keep on letting him down? if the jedi are imperfect? if everyone who hunts him, hurts him, and kills the ones he love used to call themselves jedi, too?

idk sorry i'm going so off topic i just think that cal being a kid during order 66 is So interesting and it places him in such a fascinating relationship with Being A Jedi and like his perspective on the world. i could go on and on about him forever i think dnckdchdn sorry. also this is all my own opinion yknow obviously everyone's interpretations differ <3

TL;DR i think cal made the choice that he would stop hiding at age like seventeen or whatever and never looked back because he's got a fucked up little head from years of psychological trauma and he regrets not stepping up before trilla killed prauf.

#asks #jedi survivor #jedi fallen order #cal kestis #star wars

[just-a-tiny-goldfish]

You guys know something else that drives me crazy 👀 when they’re a couple but also not a couple….

Like get this you cuddle then you kiss them, maybe u guys get it one few times 👀 but neither one ever talks about it afterwards cause they don’t want to be the one to cement it or!!! Or! One of them wants it to happen but doesn’t know how the other feels so they choose to stay silent instead. Ugh and don’t get me started on practically living with each other but one of them still has their separate place they paying for even though they don’t even live there half the month🙄.

I KNOW THOUGH todoroki fully believes y’all are soon to be married like- imagine y’all never explicitly say you two are a thing- you are NO cheater but is not cheating when your not together-even if you wouldn’t mind being with Shouto-Like it even! BUT He’s a busy guy. Sure he buys you all sorts of expensive goodies but he’s rich? Isn’t that what people with money do? So why should you think you’re special. Sure you guys have gone and hidden from a few crowds just to get a quickie in after a mission but you know…adrenaline and shit! You’ve probs seen denki and minoru sneak off with a few girls after missions too so what’s the difference??? The difference is they probs wouldn’t get mad if one of their hook ups messed around with someone else. Imagine- you show up at one of your fancy hang outs at one of the newest restaurants (cause once again-he’s rich, all rich people just causally choose candle lit dinners as hang outs right?) sporting some fresh bruises on your neck from an imprompt make out session (cause who doesn’t want you) and why would you hide them? There’s no secrets between besties-Shouto looks absolutely floored, dumbfounded. Please this man is head empty, not processing what he’s seeing. And just abruptly stands up. Your like ??? Bro we just got here what happened? But damn he’s starting to look less confused and more pissed off and now you’re like 🙂…🙃…☹️? Until both of you are quite a bit away from the restaurant and prying eyes does he finally turn to you and Fuck he looks angry. ☹️☹️☹️. “ you cheated on me” ….what? Please, I feel so bad for everyone in this situation. You’re confused and hurt and upset cause wtf you had no idea Shouto even thought of you as anything other then a close friend and Shouto is obviously going through a breakdown and you just barely got him home before he started naming off every single instance he’s ever done something romantic with you-and yeah… okay now that he is making a list it’s pretty obvious-but look you genuinely didn’t know and even though his hurt is very real he can also tell you are being very much honest. It’s definitely going to take a while before you two are back to norm- oh no wait he’s at you’re apartment door the next day, those gourmet chocolates you live so much along with flowers and he’s definitely going to make sure you know this is him coming to you as more then a friend.

Bakugou- ohhhh bakugou. He’s definitely the childhood friends to lovers. Why? Cause I said so. You guys definitely had a little “she’s my girlfriend-no one can touch her” moment in elementary. Him picking you up little dandelions but only the poofy ones so you could pretend to make little explosions with him 🥺. You definitely didn’t go to the same middle school. Only cause he was a little shot and you for sure would have called him out on his behavior-nah, you guys would meet up after at parks and shit where he wound being you sodas and snacks and definitely still little dandelions. You guys get separated during his UA years, each of you go off to do your own thing and grow as your own person. Meet again at some point-a little before he’s super well known as a pro hero, maybe it’s all cute and shit at some park just after catching some low level villain. He sees you in the middle of some trees and wildflowers and he’s like damn they are familiar then he realizes the only flower u got out of the whole bunch is just a bunch of fluffy dandelion heads and he’s like !!!!!. Maybe at some point after y’all have reconnected and shit (and obvi you guys are close! You’ve known each other since you were kids!) it’s not weird for you guys to be comfortable with each other, hugging and cooking together(him cooking mostly💀), maybe the occasion kiss on the forehead or cheek-your apartment is part of a collapse after a villain attack and you’re all worried about having to find a new place-he’s like? “Are you fucking with me? Just move in already” (Aw how sweet! You’re friend let you move in with him while you search!💐) obviously this only brings you guys closer together and bakugou has the train of thought that-yeah, you guys are going steady. Right? Who cares if he’s the main one initiating the cheek, hand, forehead kisses-you’re just shy right? Everything is going great. At least he thought until “I found a new place!” “A new place for what?” Confused as fuck “ a new apartment!” You’re all giddy and he’s like huh? Did you not like his home or something? Is it the decor? But you practically run that department in the house? He’s basically let you run the WHOLE house? So what’s the issue, maybe you just want a bigger home? But if that’s the case? Why an apartment that’s a downgrade from the fucking 5 star house he’s got right here? “Why would we get a new apartment?” “Not we-just me?” Now you’re confused, why would he think that? While Bakugou is now currently rethinking every interaction he’s had with you in the past week-did he say something? Did he do something? Overstep? He doesn’t think so-he’s been respectful, patient, he’s HELD BACK doing certain things just to let you give him the go ahead even if you make uf difficult-especially with the way you’ve taken to wearing his shirts and boxers straight out of a shower- so what’s the issue? Eventually he just bites “what did I do?” And he’s so 🥺 cause he’s been trying. And you’re like “🙂????”

Izuku is def the one where he probs overheard about your commitment issues so his brillliant plan is to just never bring up the relationship even though both of you are clearly dating. He will gladly do all the pinning-pleaseeee ugh. Him coming over to your apartment almost everyday (gotta bring takeout with him too-less of a chance of being told to go home💀) and eventually you just expect him to be there and when he’s not you’ll text him like ‘ when you coming home’ and he melts cause you’re telling him to come home☹️🫶🏽 little sappy bitch. The first time you guys fall asleep in the same bed and waking up tangled together and him apologizing over and over cause shoot did he overstep??? But your like “ I love cuddles 🙄 chill dumbass” and that’s basically his green light to just become a teddy bear every time he stays over( which is a lot) -maybe one day y’all are out together shopping for groceries (Jesus just move in together guys🙄) and some of his friends show up and are like omg I didn’t know you had a girlfriend!!! And he’s sees you just stiffen and even though he doesn’t want to deny it he’ll gladly say “actually, we’re just friends!” Just to give you peace of mind but even after he can tell your uncomfortable with the whole encounter. Maybe you stay up late watching a movie, he offers to keep you company and you shoo him off “you got work tomorrow, you’re going to be tired” so he leaves for bed, tries to stay awake but even after he hears the movie end you don’t come. He wakes up and your side is still empty, you slept on the couch. He can’t shake the feeling it was on purpose. A week goes by and you guys finally got back to you’re regularly scheduled denial and pinning. Izuku had and interview with some fancy blog and he obviously invited you along and everything is peaches an cream and then the relationship question is asked and he can’t help but glance in your direction and your white as a ghost as the people there suddenly become aware of your presence-though you’ve been there the whole time. And he panics because it’s clear everyone here has come to the same conclusion on who you are. “it’s compli- no! I’m not in a relationship” but it doesn’t matter what he says cause you’re already out of that set. He has to wait another 3 hours before he’s allowed to go chase you down, cause the whole thing is live. And when he does he’s like “oh?” Cause your just outside the building waiting for him but you’re clearly not okay. So he’s all worried and trying to explain he didn’t think they were going to get all personal with him cause he really didn’t want a repeat of last time and you’re just like “are we not dating” (how the tables have flipped) just genuinely curious. And he’s like the 🙂? Cause if he could have said y’all were dating from the start? he would-shit, he would yell it from the roof top baby girl😤 he’s version of keeping it on the down low was basically living with you-get ready for an overbearing bf.

#i project cause i also have commitment issues #only they can commit to me-I can not be tamed #i think of some awfully romantic shit for the walking sparkler for someone who doesn’t even like him that much #i feel like shouto would forgive easy if it was an honest mistake on both ends #izuku x reader #shouto x reader #bakugou x reader

[anneapocalypse]

I like your post about gray morality in video games! On the other hand I wanted to add that the gray decision-making you're talking about can have its own pitfalls (distinct from the pitfalls of centrist/apolitical "both sides are bad" apathy). I'm thinking of gritty action heroes who are presented as morally gray because they're pragmatic enough to torture and kill in the name of Truth, Justice, and the 'Murican Way, or just in the name of a macho revenge fantasy. To be clear, this isn't an indictment of gray morality, which I love when done well. Hell, the stories I'm complaining about tend not to be THAT gray in practice, as the bad guys are often SO exaggeratedly bad that there's not a real question of whether the hero is willing to Do What It Takes in the end. My point is more just that that's what people often mean when they condemn "gray morality."

Hi! Sorry this has been sitting my ask box for a while, I got busy and didn't want to just dash off a response.

(We're talking about this post, for those who haven't seen it. RIP my notifications.)

Anyway I'll just say here for the record that yeah, gray morality in fiction can be done poorly! While the line for "done poorly" is going to be different for everyone, I can certainly think of examples I've disliked.

(This got long, sorry in advance. 😩 Also, spoilers for Fallout 3 and all the Dragon Age games, if anyone cares!)

My go-to example of one I think is a real stinker is the Fallout 3 DLC "The Pitt" where the critical decision is... whether to free a bunch of people from being enslaved in horrible conditions! But! in order to free them, you have to kidnap a baby from... the enslaver. Because something something the baby's genetics are the key to curing the illness that afflict the slaves from their horrible working conditions... you don't actually have to hurt the baby, though, she'll be fine. She'll just be taken away from her parents. Who are, again, slavers. I promise I'm not making it sound any stupider than it sounds in the game itself. :P Like the whole concept of putting an infant in your video game inventory and making a break for it is just a little too wacky for me to take seriously, but it feels like you're meant to take it seriously, and apart from trying to inject some ambiguity into the decision, I'm not sure why the whole baby plot would even be there. Honestly, Fallout 3 isn't a game about moral ambiguity. (I think both New Vegas and even Fallout 4 do that kind of thing better.) Most of its major decisions boil down to "Do you want to do the Good Person Thing or the Evil Bastard thing?" That's the game. No one is trying to inject moral ambiguity into blowing up Megaton. It's just a thing you can do if you want to roleplay an Evil Character. I love Fallout 3, I'm just saying, that's what it is. And I think "The Pitt" would have been both more thematically appropriate and less stupid if it had just skipped the whole baby plot and been like "Hey! Do you want to be the Good Person who frees the slaves, or the Evil Bastard who allies with the slaver?" It's morally simple, but the thing is the baby didn't actually make that story or the decision any more interesting to me, so it might as well not have been there at all.

But Fallout 3 isn't the kind of thing I was thinking of when I made that post. I was thinking a lot more about things like the decisions in the Dragon Age games, which don't usually fall neatly into The Good Option and The Evil Option, and are more likely to ask the player to make their own judgments. And a common criticism I see of those games is that they're "centrist" and try to "both sides" in-universe issues because the game doesn't explicitly tell you which choice is The Good One, or it doesn't explicitly reward one choice and punish the other, and that's... not really an interpretation that I generally agree with? But that's a much more involved discussion, honestly. At some point, I'd like to write a post about how I feel Inquisition presents the mage rebellion, because it's such a big topic and big game (and by "I'd like to" I mean... I already have a draft started, whoops). That's just more than I have time to get into today!

But I will say this: I find the plot decisions where you're given an obvious "best option" to be the least interesting choices in the Dragon Age games. The Redcliffe decision in Origins is the most obvious one to me, where I think the option to save Connor from possession should at least have been much harder to find, because in the lore, the fact that mages even can be saved from possession and not just killed is widely unknown because it goes against the templar party line, and the fact that Ferelden's First Enchanter is just like, "Oh yeah, sure, we can totally do that, pack up the lyrium boys" just doesn't really mesh with everything else we're told about the Circles and conventional wisdom on magic. Plus, the fact that there's no consequences for leaving Redcliffe for days with Connor possessed just... makes the decision too easy, for me, because in-universe it feels like it shouldn't be that easy. There's also the werewolf decision, wherein the Lady of the Forest just tells you straight out that Zathrian can break the curse with his own death, presenting you with a "best option" that it feels both stupid and sort of comically evil to disregard (like, from a purely pragmatic standpoint why would you fight the entire pack of werewolves or an entire clan of elves when you can just make Zathrian solve the problem here and now).

The ending decision of DA2 is an example that I feel has a really stark moral contrast to it (which I've discussed before), and one that I think does place certain constraints on role-playing, but in that case I think it's appropriate to the themes of the game, so I don't mind it.

But my favorite plot decisions in Dragon Age are things like the Landsmeet, the Winter Palace, and even the Orzammar quest line. Not just because I love fantasy politics, but because you have to work with what you're given in a way that feels realistic to the setting and the story. No matter how much of a hero you are, you can't waltz into Orzammar or Denerim or Halamshiral and brute-force a perfect solution. Unless you're a dwarf yourself, you're an outsider who doesn't know anything about dwarven politics and no one is particularly forthcoming about the situation because everyone has an agenda! and yet you have to solve this conflict in order to get aid against the Blight. You have to make a decision based on very little information and almost none of it concrete. At the Landsmeet, you may want justice, but it's your word against Loghain's with no proof of what really happened at Ostagar, and if you want to win you need provable charges, you need to show the nobles that you support their interests and not just your own, and no matter which butt you put on the throne, you're faced with the very real possibility of another succession crisis a few decades on so congratulations, you've just kicked the can down the road.

And oh, the Winter Palace, my beloved. You cannot make Briala the Empress, no matter how much you might want to! You cannot abolish the monarchy. You cannot force Orlais to relinquish the Dales and re-establish the Elven state. Your options are: keep the empress whose reign overall has been sympathetic to elves and commoners and relatively diplomatic toward her neighbors, but who also may have just done a good old fashioned massacre to crush a rebellion and maintain her power; let her be killed and put the militant expansionist on the throne; get Briala and Celene back together (maybe with the hope that Briala will continue to influence her); help Briala do a blackmail which surely will work out totally fine and not backfire in anyway; or force them all to shut up and play ball for now, basically just kicking the can down the road. None of these options are perfect by any means! There are interesting and believable in-character reasons you might choose to role-play any of them. And every one has the possibility of unforeseen consequences later on, positive or negative.

I made the original post, in part, in response to condemnations of the kind of decisions I enjoy in these games. And at the end of the day, it's okay not to like those decisions, to prefer more unambiguous choices or more room to indulge in the fantasy of fixing everything. But that's not always the kind of story a game is trying to tell, and I think that's fine, and personally I enjoy the complicated decisions more. And I feel like sometimes those complicated or ambiguous choices are read as if they're either presenting all options as morally equivalent when they're not, or that they're "punishing" the player for a choice if it has any kind of negative outcome, and I don't think that's the case! I think it's fine and good in fiction to explore the ways in which trying to change things for the better can be difficult and how a choice with some negative consequences may still be the best one available, and so on and so forth.

Anyway, I hope I didn't get too far afield here, and thanks if you read this far!

#gray morality #this is so long i'm sorry #anne apocalypse making you sorry you asked since 2011 #blunders of thedas #fallout 3 critical #prewar parkstrolling #ask anne #who cancelled roger rabbit

[dhaaruni]

Dhaaruni, I hope it's ok if I vent for a moment in your askbox but it just keeps angering me and like, given the various circumstances of my life, the thing that gets me about young women and girls these days wanting to be wives so their husband pays for everything and they magically hold zero cares in the world is like.... Have you ever even Been There? [1]

No extra money of your own because it's in a joint account so it's for Everyone or No One? Cleaning the house, doing the laundry, cooking meals, etc.--something you will be expected to do as the Unemployed Person! Even if "hubby" never says so explicitly I guarantee you he's been raised to anticipate some woman always being there to fulfill his needs and keep house--can only fill up so much of your time. For example, I can sweep and mop up half of a house and wash up a load of laundry in 2 hours. Wow! How efficient. Except gee, what to do next? The other half? Bake a loaf of bread or a batch of cookies? (I do enjoy baking and cooking but it's still work!) Another odd load of laundry? Oh wait. There's so many things to watch on streaming services! Books to read! Maybe I'll finish up my painting!! Except when do you feel justified to take time like that when a full time job is from 8 to 5, and you can get so much done is so little time? [2] [Wow, finally tumblr is cooperating with me! Last one!] Oh but wait! Childcare. Childcare is a whole new ballpark. Have fun communicating with a wee screeching thing for anything from hunger and thirst, to outside playtime, oh no the favorite blanket is missing, and so on. It's not frustrating or maddening at all! Bonus points if you find yourself hit in the head by any object the baby/toddler can throw at you, and no amount of, "No, we don't throw. That's not nice. That hurts." will stop it! You just have to take it and hope that someday it'll finally click before you're the one screaming and throwing things in the backyard. And that's one little piece of childcare! You have to factor in meal planning for picky tastes but also ensure a balanced diet lest you constipate or give them diarrhea to kingdom come! Blowouts and diapers so sodden with urine they explode just by removing clothes! Tantrums and when they realize they can't throw something at you, they will scream right in your ear! Etc.! (I know it's Controversial ig but David Lynch nailed it with Eraserhead. Parenthood is that messy and messed up, This Be the Verse, etc.) Like this is well and truly what makes me wonder about girls and women wanting this. It gets old. I'm not saying a job as a cashier or barista is gonna fulfill my life or wouldn't be as mind-numbingly soul crushing. But it would actually pay bills! It would be more than the paltry change I'm granted as a full time nanny right now! Yes, I work 10.5-12 hours a day and I'm way below the poverty line! But ig I ought to be happy bc childcare isn't real work somehow? Or that it's solely my money? Except I can't afford much of anything without risking overdraft hmm. Which ig is why minimum wage looks better where I'm at! Terrible, right? Because even that tiny sum is an improvement for me. Like I'm part of a long, long line of unemployed, unmarried, childless women being made into cheap and convenient childcare! So the return to tradwife bimbo whatever bullshit makes me livid constantly. I cried so many times reading The Feminine Mystique bc while Betty Friedan didn't write it with someone like me in mind--I got my degree! I've never wanted kids! Sure I never planned out future education or found employment in my field, but this wasn't my choice!--, I can relate all too well! And all these girls and women wanting to go back?? Please please please READ The Feminine Mystique! I don't know a single woman that would take my place much less choose to be a stay at home mom even if money wasn't an issue! Because shockingly if women are human beings, our lives don't end at motherhood and homemaking! Crazy concept, right?

You're completely right, and I think you'll appreciate this post from @mini-wrants with @sprinkledsalt's addition.

#anonymous #answered #feminism

[menalez]

i'm sorry if this is going to be long but i'm honestly a bit at my wits ends here. nearly a week ago, i was hit with the strongest realization in my life that i am prob a homosexual who's severely traumatized by everything that's happened to me and hence why it took me a very long time to come to terms with it. i held onto other labels like my life depended on it and although i used the lesbian label before, it was a couple of years ago and it was only for like a month or so before i doubted myself, freaked out, and went with another label. i thought, okay, that's it, i am done with that mess and can just move on with my life. idk what happened recently, but it was a combination of coming across a post by a straight woman who thought she was bi/les before realizing that being online destroyed her brain and made her think she wasn't attracted to men when she clearly was, and how she realized it finally because she noticed only being sexually aroused easily by men's bodies (like when they are topless at the beach or smth), plus a documentary i saw about gay conversion therapy that featured a gay man talking about how he was desperate to be normal and chased after marriage with a woman "with a vengeance" (a thought process i am very familiar with).... there's other things but i don't want this to get too long or triggering for other ppl so i'll stop here. but just like that, it hit me like a heavy truck that i was only into women this entire time and just hated myself so much. didn't helped that many people in my life, including perfect strangers, telling me that they think i'm actually gay. but then i see posts on yr blog about "so called lesbians coming out later in life are actually just bisexual" and now i'm like.... idk what to believe anymore. i wish i can talk about this with other lesbians about this and just let them all determine what i truly am, because the last thing i want to do is come out and then a man comes into my future and ~change everything~ lmao sounds so stupid when i wrote it like that but yeah. i don't want to hurt lesbians with this, but i also don't have to feel like living a lie anymore or keep trying to "heal: myself because anytime i try to do so, even if it's something as simple as looking at pictures or drawings of a p*nis, i feel so disgusted i want to throw up. i know for a fact that there has never been a moment in my life where i felt that real sexual desire over men or male bodies or anything like that, but all of that gets muddied when other factors have been thrown in due to my life events, if that makes sense. like i'm sorry if this sounds horrible but there is a part of me that hopes i am not a homosexual. i love gay men and lesbians just like anyone else, but i just don't want this to be true. i feel like my life has already been hard for other reasons, and putting this on top of everything else will be too much for me to handle and i'll just end up killing myself over it in the end. i want to live and be happy, but i'm just so conflicted over this topic.

just to clarify, i have never argued that the age in which a lesbian comes out means shes actually bisexual or not. i was complaining explicitly about how many bisexual women will use the label lesbian upon realising their same sex attraction later in life, will talk about having been into men etc but will say theyre lesbians *now*. i take issue with these women because i believe there are genuine lesbians who came out later in life being overshadowed by this phenomenon of bi women leaving their ex-husbands and then claiming to be lesbians bc they decided after 2 decades of dating men that they only want to date women (which is fine, but exclusively wanting to date women and exclusively being into women are overlapping yet different things). i think it harms actually "late bloomer lesbians" bc a lot, that ive seen, using that term are indeed bisexual not lesbians.

that said, i can understand your mindset and where you're coming from. but take it from me, rejecting your sexuality and wishing it away and trying to ignore it and trying to change it etc will simply not work. you may ultimately be wrong, sure, and for that reason i encourage you to take your time thinking over your life and analysing your feelings towards men if necessary, and only when you're sure of it declare what your sexuality is. sure, you may end up wrong somehow regardless, there's no guarantee that despite our certainty that we are the sexuality we believe ourselves to be. but if you push yourself into the closet and deny yourself and reject yourself bc of the off-chance that maybe just maybe you're actually bisexual with such a strong preference for women (despite having no history of being into men nor hints of that attraction to them) isn't going to help you either.

your fear does make sense. i went through similar when i was coming to terms with my sexuality and i absolutely did not want to be a lesbian. the thought of it literally put me into such a terrible state of panic, i would've much preferred to just be bi so that i could potentially have a socially acceptable life in my country. but no wishing and rejecting ourselves will change our sexuality, it'll simply make us more traumatised and unhappy. you seem fairly confident in your feelings to me, don't reject yourself with unlikely What Ifs.. as many other bi women said on this topic, there usually ARE signs of OSA throughout their lives, they just explain it away. if u have never & continue not to feel anything sexual towards male bodies, if u have never had a crush on a man including male celebs, etc then i think ur far more likely than not a lesbian. ignoring that will not change ur sexuality, but its up to u how u move forward with that. i can at least tell u that from my experience, accepting myself for who i am has changed my life positively and gave me a will to live that i was lacking in my life prior. its difficult to face discrimination and lesbophobia, but its even more difficult to still face some of that AND on top of it be rejecting urself and hating urself

[detectivenyx]

About your response to my question about Byakuya, I've noticed that in the fanganronpa community, there is this expectation of a "Tsumugi". More specifically, a character who is secretly the mastermind amongst the group of participants. V3 was the first game to have something explicitly like this. Mukuro exists but she died too early to do anything; Hajime and Izuru are separate personalities and Izuru wasn't part of the killing game. The MM would most likely live to around the end of killing game and then probably die. It going to become formulaic even if the motive is unique and well-written. I appreciate that SDRA2 so far did something unique with having the MM be revealed in the prologue while having VOID (a group of traitors working for the mastermind). I know that a killing game like this by nature has to have SOME mastermind but I believe there is some missing potential with incorporating the mastermind into your story rather than another Junko, another Tsumugi, or even another Mikado (SDRA2) (or even another "The Protag is the mastermind" shocking). Of course, there is nothing wrong with including these formulas for the mastermind as long as it fits the story the best.

(cont)

Mastermind AU Shuichi is overrated. It makes sense but for some reason, it feels like too much of an obvious choice. Also, I'm not an angst/hurt/betrayal fan so making someone like Tsumugi (a character who doesn't have any close relationships with the cast) works fine for me. Tsumugi may seem like an obvious choice too but at least it would be more comedic than edgelord MM Shuichi. After reading the ongoing fanfiction, I find the idea of Tsumugi being revealed as the mastermind early and having the rest of the cast deal with her very interesting and entertaining. Mastermind Tsumugi in general is really interesting and I wish they delve deeper into her in canon. I like it when fanfics show not only how crazy Tsumugi is but how human she is with deep flaws, incompetence, and insecurities, unlike Canon Junko. (See I'd Trade My Life For Yours).

okay, before responding, i am pretty sick and tired of people just willy-nilly spraying spoilers about good fangans/fanfics because it means i have no real investment in reading them. i'm tagging the spoilers and posting a heads up after this in case someone doesn't have them tagged (this exact attitude from SDRA2 fans put me off ever bothering to play it - in all honesty if SDRA2 fans ever got into the MCU it'd be dead in the water within a few weeks). if i had nothing to say, i wouldn't even respond to this ask. im not mad if it's the canon, since i expect that if people are following me they have played the whole game (or are smart enough to have the canon games tagged), but i am mad when it's fan content.

i think the fangan community is a little more justified in adding 'tsumugi' in - even back in the pre-v3 days, masterminds among the cast were pretty common for fan content, and are more of a construct of a DR game like the murder cases, rather than cramming a character to fit an archetype. there isn't a lot you can do with the mastermind; someone does have to be behind everything.

there really isn't a lot you can do - DR1 already did the 'basically outside force is the one behind the game' with junko, did the 'mastermind forgot who they were' with izuru (and it fucking sucked because we only got introduced to izuru like 45 minutes before he was revealed as the mastermind), did the 'mastermind fucking sucks' with kazuo, and 'mastermind is a participant' with tsumugi. every mastermind trope was already done except for revealing them instantly, which was done in SDRA2 (and mikado is still a killing game participant that, for some reason, everyone just lets live), and revealing them halfway through, which you then have to justify why they were revealed halfway through, probably the least satisfying time to reveal the mastermind (i don't care if it's subversive, it makes your mastermind look incompetent, and of everyone, your mastermind is really not who you want to be incompetent)

even if you argue 'kill the mastermind early', technically they did that with mukuro - she wasn't the 'true' mastermind, but she was definitely one of them, and convincing enough for kyouko to believe she was the true mastermind. killing them halfway through the game also presents its own issues - they need to be replaced, but it also means both masterminds are a lot weaker since they only get about half the amount of time that a 'boring' mastermind would get to push forth their version of the game. trying to reinvent the mastermind with writing gimmicks, subverting the trope for the sake of subverting the trope, will just result in the mastermind being fucking garbage.

junko wasn't a great mastermind because her tropes were never done before, junko was a great mastermind because she did the tropes in a fucking terrifying way. 'looks human but isn't' is a terrifying trope, and to see junko be little more than flesh and blood in body, but thoroughly inhuman in her soul and mind, was absolutely thrilling in my opinion. and kind of relatable in the way it was executed - being the ultimate analyst, things became predictable to her, and thus she sought more and more extreme ways to feel anything, with the only other emotion she could really feel being despair, and launching herself into that because at least it wasn't boredom.

tsumugi's terror comes from the fact she is scarily human, but not quite; and i think diving into her psyche and humanizing her more would actually wind up ruining her. we already know what she is. she's a fanatic - nothing but danganronpa matters to her, and she echoes real fans who take their love too far. as for her getting revealed early on? she just straight up wouldn't survive. maki would've killed her by chapter 3 at the latest because of those flaws - tsumugi would've needed obscene amounts of plot armour to survive. her flaws and insecurities don't matter once she doesn't need to pretend to be like everyone else.

#SDRA2 SPOILERS #i'd trade my life for yours spoilers #dr spoilers #sdr2 spoilers #dr3 spoilers #ndrv3 spoilers #- nyx (they/she)

[pinkseas]

naur but everytime i word vomit into ur inbox i literally cant remember 70% of it than the core details and the ones you answered the next day so it's kinna funny i wish tumblr lets me save my anon asks than eating it up cus i ain't drafting it like ANYWAY TO UR BESTIE THAT MENTIONED US >> I LOVE GOING INSANE WITH ALY PINKSEAS TOO ur friends are so real!!!!!!! youre insane are you single IS SUCH A FUNNY ASS LINE I WISH I WAS HIT BY IT AND I'D SAY YEA WHAT ABOUT IT

"twitter scares me so bad" as you should it's a shithole for genshin altogether with discourse and mischaracterization and you'd literally cannot stop seeing any of them once you get genshin in ur algorithm and yknow what i realized my only Best fandom experience came from tumblr with undertale Despite its discourses bc its got effective filters and the people are genuinely Good so now i'm thinking of yeeting outta twt and spectating my way here like last time (i am already doing it)

"if i read soulmates it has to be done Right [...] they can’t depend on one another they cant need one another they have to Want. they have to Choose" LIKE NO YEAH THIS IS SO TRUE SO REAL THIS IS WHAT BUGS ME ON SOULMATE AUS when it's almost not by choice and they have to work on accepting it like they're forced into needing it's like,.. a very complicated method here in changing their minds toward the other person Because of the cursed bestowed on them- the point of Choice is so fucking important to me especially when it comes to xiao specifically bc in my rendition of his he's unfamiliar with such things for a long time,.. and even in canon he's a lil troubled about deciding things for himself in the presence of higher beings until he's allowed to IT JUST HURTS HE LOST HIS FREE WILL AND THEN UR SOUL BOUND LIKE WHAT (AND FR specific soulmate tropes where the two ARE given the choice for it are. acceptable 2 me)

"lumine handling intensity well and being much better at identifying her emotions suits her SO well imo" yeah like yea!!EVERYTHING ABT THIS and i think it follows up all the traveler's sass in-game bc she's so fuckin hilarious for delivering lines super well despite having Less lines cus aside paimon taking over the talking she does have her moments and i lov her for it I DO WISH THEY HAVE HER TALK MORE EVEN WITH THE USUAL TEXT CHOOSING i just want her sick ass lines conversing

FKSDFHJSKDFJ ENDEARING IS SUCH A GODLIKE WORD TO ME I WILL KEEP USING IT FOR XIAO EVER its the way you can use it like. subtlely. a lil hidden a lil not Much about his cuteness without explicitly calling him cute its Big Word for the small boy!!!!

your thoughts on qpr makes me feel so much better abt thinking this way bout r/s like YEAH its all abt communication and open with boundaries and there really is something stifling about established r/s BUT IT'S COMPLETELY FINE FOR THOSE WHO PREFER THAT ANYHOW!!

AND YES SO MUCH ON LUMINE AND XIAO'S SHOW OF ATTRACTION TO EACH OTHER i wudnt even call it attraction i think anything that indicates a romantic tension between them is something i'm not gonna entertain like 'craving' or 'desire' (this word in particular is used very specific) and stuff like that, and it's a big fact that lumine's attachment feels like its the same to everyone Except aether,... even after she discovers his abyss persona she still begs for them to go back home too. it's unbeatable even to xiao, or at least, xiao has a different treatment to kindness for being so Similar to her (breaks down) "i feel like seeing each other constantly would be a detriment i think it’d make them both feel really weird." like RIGHT????? IT JUST FEELS OFF THIS WAY and it's not a good portrayal of xiao's desperation not wanting to lose someone else anymore. but even then, idt he shows that notion much or at all than his self-sacrifice tendencies, which is an entirely different topic. this thing about xiao's attachments and morals is a complicated thing to tackle altogether...;;,,

"no bc i characterize lumine as LOVING nature so bad" and u are absolute fucking RIGHT to think that, and for me she just likes exploring in general and is a bit of a reckless daredevil so long she has her glider and its the only condition. its stupid it's silly BUT IT MAKES SENSE shes just a constant headache to xiao in looking after her testing through the terrain but /pos

"i am So Grateful to you for sharing your thoughts i am so giddy over us being on such similar wavelengths" AND ME TO YOU TOO IT'S BEEN SO GOOD TO JUST SPILL EVERYTHING I HAVE IN MIND and get comfortable even on stuff im shy to reveal on unpublished asks cus ur reactions even if not agreeing there's still some reassurance anyway and i dont mind that or feel rejected at all when 98% others is what we just. have connected brains on KDJFHSDKJFH AND JEEZ I RLLY DO CAN'T HELP MYSELF WHEN THE BRAINWORMS INVADE WHEN I REPLY UR RESPONSES TOO it takes over my fingers like a parasite i gratefully let em

and ouuouh ur interpretation of the two's development starting in inazuma is so sweet and it makes sense bc of how dangerous the region is bc in my silly lil bran it made sense to have it After the chasm since it's the quests centering his arc AND I STILL CANT BELIEVE HE HAS HIS OWN ARCHON INTERLUDE,.. this made me loving all the peeps of the chasm gang too and i wish they did Something after the quest ended like UEUEUE TRAUMA SHARING SESSION FOR PPL WHO ONLY MET FOR 3 DAYS LETS GO

so like i start from sumeru bc of the points bc of this and bc i love slow development So Much im practically immune to slowburn did u know. all those fics do Not affect me even if i reach its 30th chapter of them being reluctant to opening up. ""zhongli encouraging him to take more time to himself, lumine taking him on little trips guiding him out more and more and more often" is THE CONCEPT EVER YOU HAVE ZHONGLI INVOLVED idk if you dig this but parental zhongli has me on the floor so id like to think he's another important figure in xiao's life aside lumine too he's just that warm hand on his back encouraging Out of his comfort zone and obligations and lumine's the hand that pulls him Along to see the new things of the world. like zhongli is such a dad,.... doing dad things a grandpa to liyue but i also cant help but have him having an attachment to xiao knowing they share a life even as a master-subordinate r/s (cus in my interpretation zhongli never felt that way than thinking he just wants xiao to Live, too,.. sobbing crying shitting)

"taking baby steps in leaving that part of his life, never quite letting go but letting the ties that hold him to liyue loosen, never forgetting his contract and his duty but understanding that there’s no longer an obligation to fulfill it, that he does it out of his own wish instead. i just. idk. idk !!!!!! at the core of it i think im obsessed with them learning how to live again and doing it together" i got no words. i ran out of brain fuel but my body is convulsing folding in on itself liek MY LIEGE YOU ARE!!!!! U R SO,........ LIKE OSBFGKJFGHDKJGH YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this is THE XIAOLUMI AND METHINKS,....... THE XIAO ARC IN ENTIRETY AS WELL CUS I BELIEVE IN HIS INDEPENDENCY (with a little help and support from ppl who cares bout him) i just akjdhaskejjksfhsdfkjhdsjfhkjdsbvadhvbjhkv

using a read more thingy just for the sake of anyone on mobile

NOT REMEMBERING ASKS IS SO REAL i forget what i say so often even when i Can go back and check how the fuck am i supposed to know what ive said when i Can't

MY BESTIE THAT MENTIONED US >>> SO REAL i think its been more than a few at this point actually which is very funny to me. shan if ur reading this i am holding u so close to me in my little arms. youre insane are you single is the best line ever especially when you are Dating The Person Who Says It my response every time is "no but i could be😏" i find myself far too funny its awful

we are Shaking Hands in terms of being on tumblr experiencing the undertale fandom that's so real of us undertale was the reason i got a tumblr in the first place all those years ago... you should ABSOLUTELY spectate here i literally never see anything i don't want to see i live in my perfect little echo chamber it's so <333

"even in canon he's a lil troubled about deciding things for himself in the presence of higher beings until he's allowed to" GODDD YEAH YEAH YEAH YEA H YEAH YEAHY HEA YEAH !!!!!!!!!!!!! do NOT force this boy into situations he does that enough by himself thank you very much

"even after she discovers his abyss persona she still begs for them to go back home" no bc its just. On Another Level Genuinely. they've been traveling together with no one but each other with god knows how long especially depending on personal headcanons, they're used to going through entire worlds and moving on theyre used to not getting super attached !!! its a little different in teyvat i think because theyve lost most of their power and they're trapped and alone for the foreseeable future but. that still doesnt change the past and their habits yknow ?? its something i try REALLY hard not to think about actually because (with the exception of a very specific au which i am currently writing for) unless they're just. trapped on teyvat Forever i CANNOT imagine lumine staying there once she has the ability to leave and i CANNOT imagine xiao ever leaving. it makes me So Sad genuinely i simply refuse to acknowledge its existence

"xiao's attachments and morals is a complicated thing to tackle altogether" SO REAL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM SO GLAD U THINK IM RIGHT ABT THE NATURE LOVING it just feels right tbh and "shes just a constant headache to xiao in looking after her testing through the terrain but /pos" also so real <33333333 lumine and her silly little glider. god. i love them both so bad

i do like to think of the chasm as post-inazuma but thats because in my head w/ their development inazuma is like. The Next Step almost, where they're close enough in liyue but the fact that they continue to be close even once lumine has left really hits. and then they've been a bit closer and become familiar with one another in quite a few ways by the time the chasm happens and then i get super self indulgent with the chasm because i am so silly like that <3333 in terms of slowburn and the way you've described their growing closeness it does make SO much sense to swap it tbh i love the thought of the chasm being like the start of things and the way that'd bring them closer before inazuma and. mfgnmhfnmf god. GOD.

"i wish they did Something after the quest ended" no bc in my little brain they get together once every month or two just to have a meal together and talk and keep up with each other they are Friends Now

"parental zhongli has me on the floor so id like to think he's another important figure in xiao's life aside lumine too he's just that warm hand on his back encouraging Out of his comfort zone and obligations and lumine's the hand that pulls him Along to see the new things of the world" this is the most perfect accurate thing i have read in my entire life for starters i LOVE parental zhongli like. idk not FULL parental not too much but def him being a more parental figure in xiao's life especially compared to other interpretations of their dynamic i just. god. it is So Important to me that zhongli cares for him and looks after him just in those little ways. the warm encouraging hand on his back vs the hand pulling him along is PERFECT thats such a fucking amazing way of putting it i love everything abotu that the image is so clear in my head

o(-(

^^^ me dead on the floor thinking about zhongli and lumine being such important figures in xiao's life... i like to think that a Lot of the characters in liyue are important to him in different, small little ways i just don't know their characters well enough to fully describe how but like. idk baizhu qiqi yanfei ganyu yknow ?? i know next to nothing about yanfei but i might have to try and write her for this honestly we'll see how it goes but i REALLY want there to be at least one character other than the few i have now who he ends up talking to even if its just smth rly simple... if nothing else the chasm crew is getting an honorable mention on god

idk i just. xiao has done so much for liyue for so long i really love to think of those very few who know him trying to do little supporting things for him, too it's so important to me

okay and now !!!

i am also gonna answer the Other Ask but without publishing it naturally it will simply live comfy cozy in my inbox <333

THAT ONE SHIP "it mischaracterizes Both characters in the pair altogether for the sake of romance" you're so real for this idk i dont MIND seeing it but it has never felt in character to me and i feel like this describes exactly why ?? idk maybe its just the xiaolumi brainworms eating away at me but like. i Get It

what you said about like. your personal hcs for him in regards to that trauma and how he processes it that is SO fucking valid, i def understand getting anxious about certain self-indulgent hcs im the same way both with the sillier ones and heavier ones but i can promise you that if nothing else i will Never judge you for even the most self indulgent ridiculous shit EVER. like the way you described it all is so valid and so easy to picture and a really good way to interpret/believe he'd deal with everything but even if you were to have the most ooc headcanon or anything ever just for fun just for the sake of it i simply would never judge having fun is the Most Important with these things im so srs

we have diff interpretations of how he'd deal with things like the yaksha's deaths and zhongli dying but i think a lot of the points we both have are still pretty similar, ESPECIALLY with him not knowing how to handle it and ESPECIALLY especially with the shock factor. the way i write him or would write his reaction to that would definitely be him just sort of Shutting Down emotionally because its too much and too overwhelming and so he kicks into like. i cant call it work mode its not really a job. but he fully focuses on fighting and finding out who couldve killed rex lapis and like. he turns his attention to things that are familiar and easier to deal with and he buries himself in them the way one would bury themselves in their work to ignore emotions yknow? and then there'd be the shock factor of "oh he Is alive" and then there's this massive pit of grief with nowhere to go because logically, reasonably, rex lapis is alive, there's nothing left to grieve. he shouldn't still be upset <- man who refuses to let himself process and feel his emotions when the emotions dont stop existing just bc he ignores them

that being said that's definitely a Pattern With Me Specifically like in the barbara fic ive been working its built off of canon but i take it SO far just bc i can :sob: and i enjoy it way too much to want to Not do that yknow? girls who struggle to process and Actually Feel their emotions writing characters strugglign to process and Actually Feel their emotions so that she can process and feel them vicariously through them <3 or something along those lines idk at this point its less that and more "wow this is really fun to write and its smth im familiar with so its easier to write as well"

my cat meowed and i stepped away for like 2 seconds to pet her and immediately lost every train of thought ive ever had in my life hopefully i wasnt gonna say anything else LMAO but no yeah self indulgent hcs and ways of interpreting characters >>>>>>>

i keep reading and rereading the way you described xiao's response to grief i am OBSESSED its so easy to imagine its so easy to see like oh my god. ohhhh my god. based as hell it suits him so well

i cannot think of anythign else to say back to the trenches i go <- finding scenes where i started in the middle or left out the endings and filling those parts in now that i dont know what else to write. its been really nice actually ive gotten a lot done just with that LMAO

#parasocial bestie tag

[tuiyla]

That is exactly my point, all the wrong people are going to participate and it is going to be a distasteful, disrespectful mess. I didn't mean Matthew, he hadn't even crossed mind, I don't know the first thing about him as a person, I said Naya's ex-husband. He had hurt Naya terribly during their marriage and he has been trying to whitewash himself ever since he'd become a single father to her child, he'd taken every opportunity to talk about her but mostly about himself. I'm not going to explicitly say what he'd done but I think you know what I'm talking about. There's no coming back from something like that and so it doesn't sit well with me to have him talk about her after everything he'd put her through. But since you brought up Matthew, I don't imagine a writer would go against Ryan Murphy or anybody important in that production if he wishes to get future work in Hollywood. I think you are right about Heather, maybe she won't be in it after all. What I meant was she'd definitely go in with all the good intentions, I would never accuse her of not meaning well, it's just not going to be a production that actually wishes well for these people is my point. Kevin and Jenna clamp up at the first hint of any real drama and I don't blame them, I think that's the way to go, so I really don't know that they're going to participate in something that's all about messy drama. There are people who could profit off of the glee drama and that is why this series shouldn't be happening in the first place. It doesn't sound like the creators have good intentions, they're not trying to make any sort of a tribute, they're trying to stir the pot, they're trying to bring out all the negativity, there are zero good intentions behind this. Celebrity drama docuseries sell well and all they do is hurt the people hurt by the events even more while filling out the pockets of the creators who don't care about these people. Perhaps I am being too blunt but that's only because I care, and I am just a person on tumblr, I am not saying any of this in a Hollywood production that many many will see, I am not trying to profit off of these unpleasant and tragic events. It is a bad idea all around and Cory and Naya and their friends and families deserve better, like you said yourself, this is going to be a soap and this time it will not originate in and stay in fandom gossip spaces. It is entirely unnecessary that a series like this is created.

Yes sorry the reading comprehension thing was my bad, you said ex-husband so I should have known you meant Ryan. Look, I don't know enough about Ryan Dorsey to judge nor do I want to. You're entitled to your opinion but imo calling him attention hungry is disrespectful when his kid's mother died and he honours her memory regularly. Whatever went down with their marriage is none of our business. If I had to say, I'm sure Naya herself would also only care about the fact that he's taking care of their son.

Again, you're free to think what you think, but it doesn't sit well with me to be hung up on what he does and does not do. You don't know him or the family. Who are you to judge, honestly? Who are any of us to. He grieved an ex-wife and the mother of his little boy and it's kinda gross to judge how he did that as far as the public could tell. They don't owe us anything and it feels insensitive to sit with our phones in hand and say that he's talked too much about himself or whatnot. I'm not gonna tell you what to do but like... maybe don't do that.

Without a paragraph break it got kind of hard to follow your message, ngl, but I agree that I don't think there are any good intentions behind the docuseries whatsoever. And we also agree that all the very real people affected by the real tragedies surrounding the show deserve better than to be exploited for some cash and buzz. So with that respect in mind all I can say is that we'll have to see how it turns out. And don't go around judging people we'll never know. Just because we read Naya's book it doesn't give us permission to judge people in her life and invalidate their grief.

#oh boy #i just really don't vibe with all that you're throwing at someone you don't know anon #do you really think this is the way to honour her #anon #nonglee asks #glee cast #glee docuseries

[xxspringmelodyxx]

FAQ:

Are requests open?

As of right now, requests are closed but I am hoping that once I get everything back to normal, I will open them again. If you want to request something and are over the age of 18, please still send it in if you’d like! I just won’t get to it until I am ready to start taking them. You can also just talk to me through them if you’d like. I love hearing from you all <33333

What are your restrictions for writing?

I don’t have many restrictions actually, so feel free to ask! Don’t be discouraged, my dear! I write sfw/nsfw, AU’s, angst, and fluff stories and am happy to do so, though if there are any requests that make me uncomfortable or I decide not to write about them, I will either reply privately or just delete the request :) However, that being said, I do only write for female readers x male characters because it's the only thing I’m good at. It’s in my comfort zone and the last thing I would want to do is attempt something I am not qualified for, only for it to hurt/disrespect someone else.

How to Request?

Please send your requests in through my ask section. This will be easier for me to see rather than requesting through my comments section. Please be as detailed as you want so I can make sure the story is to your expectations. Again, I will only do requests from people who are above 18 <3

How to be added to/removed from a Tag List?

To be added, you have to be above the age of 18 (Sorry for repeating myself on this, I just want to make it clear that I will only interact with adults, not minors) You can be added to a tag list by sending an ask! Just let me know what taglist(s) you would like to be added to and I’ll get that done ASAP! I’ll then respond to those requests to let you know when you have been added. Please also let me know what @username you would like for me to use so I can make sure to use the correct one. If you want to change the account associated with the taglist(s), just let me know and I’ll update the tag list so you can get notifications on any account you want :) Please also explicitly state if you would like to be added to the tag list. The same goes for if you’d like to be removed from taglists!

Who am I? (Not really an FAQ, but just thought I’d add this for anybody who cares, Lmao)

I am currently a college student and planning to work in the medical field. I will be very busy with all my classes and hopefully a new job in the hospital…this means that once school starts, I might be a little slower in writing, but I will still write. I also promise not to delete this account this time, haha. Writing helps keep me inspired and creative, which is something I never want to lose, especially with how life is sometimes. Once this starts, I just kindly ask to be patient with me as it might take me a while to get writing. 

What are you currently writing about?

Right now, I am writing for Genshin Impact and Honkai Star Rail. However, I quickly change through these things and the list begins to increase. I am wanting to actually try writing for Manhwa as well because I have so many creative ideas for them, such as “How to get my husband on my side” or “Gaman Shinaide, Hades-sama”. I might wait on that though…but who knows. With all that being said, please request anything. I love to write for anything…except for real life people. I only write for fictional characters. Again, if it’s something I am not comfortable writing, I’ll just delete it or politely let the requester know <3

What fandoms have you written for?

I have written for Genshin, HSR, Spyxfamily, Black Clover, Fairy Tail, MK11, Diabolik Lovers, Black Butler, Marvel, BNHA, Howl's Moving Castle, Harry Potter, etc. If none of these are to your interest, please still ask me and I will do research if I don’t know the fandom. That’s how I used to do all my writing when I was younger for characters I didn’t know about. It was actually fun too! I also have watched many different anime/games that I just haven’t written about. <3

Any other rules?

I do write nsfw so please, if you are under the age of 18, DO NOT read those. I put those warnings in the stories and any other story that might have some suggestive/adult content, so please respect my boundaries. If you read my sfw, that’s alright, but please don’t interact with me nor my nsfw stories if you are underage. Nothing against you, I just feel uncomfortable interacting with people younger than 18. Please also be kind to one another. I believe that no matter what, we should all respect each other!

If you still have questions after this, please let me know and I will get back to you ASAP! Love you!!

#faq #rules