#and u have no fucking words because fuck yeah u do

[murdrdocs]

threesome; she/her pronouns used: cuckold vibes; idea from @cybersunnie (lov u sunnie) MDNI 18+ w/ PATRICK ZWEIG AND ART DONALDSON

you'd thought patrick was being egotistical at first. you thought he was being condescending, demeaning, even. which he was. but he had reason to be.

his words, spoken through a smirk when the end of his cigarette wasn't occupying his mouth, had seemed designed to piss you off.

"you think you can take it?" he'd asked you. and you rolled your eyes, huffed, and looked over at art, assuming he would be quick to defend you. art had his eyes flickering between you and patrick, his own lips pulled into an amused smirk. like he knew patrick was right.

you defended yourself at the time, claiming that patrick was just being cocky and a dick and he didn't know what he was talking about. but he certainly did.

because here you are with your legs spread to allow patrick between them, struggling to take all of him.

patrick has his hands holding your thighs, rubbing his thumbs into your skin in a soothing manner. art's beside you, kissing over your shoulders and neck, trying to help you relax.

"jus' let him in," art tells you, his head jerking toward where patrick has been steadily sliding his cock into you for the past couple of minutes. you have been letting patrick in, subconsciously at that. you can feel the way your cunt is greedily sucking in his length over and over again. yet you still aren't used to the feeling.

you're still whining in the back of your throat, your eyes switching between watching art and watching the ceiling. for just a second, you look down at patrick, but you have to look right away in fear that you'll cum too soon.

you can't give him that satisfaction.

but the sight of him is so arousing. his hair, freshly cut, hanging over his face just right. droplets of sweat covering his forehead and sliding down his nose. his lips parted, almost as if he's stunned, his jaw dropped as he steadily slides in and out of you.

you know he would have that usual smirk if he weren’t mesmerized by the look of you taking him.

“how’s she holding up?” he asks art, his words raspier than you’ve ever heard them before.

art looks at you, raising his eyebrows. “she’s good,” he tells patrick. then, “yeah?” he speaks only to you that time, waiting for your confirmation as his eyes continuously hold your gaze. you nod, your lips parting as you try to verbally confirm that yeah, you do feel good. embarrassingly, a moan slips out instead.

art grins, pressing his lips to yours.

“she’s taking it like a fuckin’ champ.” patrick speaks to no one in particular since you and art are both preoccupied with each other. maybe he’s speaking to himself.

either way, you can hear the smirk in his words this time. you didn’t need to even look at him to know that it’s there.

as soon as art is away from your lips, he doesn't waste anytime helping you out.

"you're doing so good for us," when his lips are under your ear. "we told you it would be hard, right?" when he licks under your jaw. "but look at you," when he slides his hand down your abdomen. "making it look easy," when he presses two fingers onto your clit.

it's just what you needed, the addition desired for you to actually make it look easy. you relax, finally losing yourself in the heavy fullness of patrick fucking you.

and you probably won't ever admit it to him, not unless he fucks the admission out of you, but patrick knows what he's doing. all of the stories he pushed onto you and art, the ones you pretended to be disgusted over, held truth to them. when he talked in gross detail about how the women he slept with reacted to him, how they were screaming and begging for more, you thought he was exaggerating. but now you know he wasn’t.

because you’ve turned into those women. you're demanding patrick for more, and then begging instead when art coos at you to fix your attitude. you're hooking your legs over patrick’s waist, digging into his lower back to try and get him to give you more. you're graciously accepting what patrick does give you, linking one hand into his hair when he gets close enough and then doing the same with art.

you balance attention from both, alternating between tilting your head to the side to allow art to kiss you and facing forward to do the same with patrick. and when you're done, when you've taken one orgasm from patrick without complaint and begged him for another, you see the look on his face. the one that tells you he's waiting for you—expecting you to tell him what he already knows.

you don't say anything, instead letting the obvious soreness in your body and visible exhaustion speak for itself.

#artsworld! #patricksworld! #patrick zweig x reader #art donaldson x reader #art donaldson x you #patrick zweig x you #celeste writes challengers

[moonstruckme]

Hii how are u? i'm feeling kinda anxious today so can i request a poly!marauders or just remus where they/he comfort r because she's scared about the future please?

this is like a personal request because i'm in my 20s and i know i should find a job and i want to but i'm terrified bc i don't like to interact with new people😭 and every single night when i reflect on my future i just get so scared and anxious and i hate i was born like this because my younger sisters are more outgoing than me and they have no problems but i just feel kind of pathethic yk🫠 SORRY FOR VENTING IN UR BOX IT'S JUST BC I LOVE YOUR WRITING BUT FEEL FREE TO IGNORE THISIF YOU DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE🙏😖

Hi lovely, don't be sorry! I'm sorry you're so anxious. Wishing you the best and thanks for requesting <3

cw: anxiety

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 483 words

Remus lets his hand lay heavy on your head, thumb stroking your temple while hot tears carve paths across your face to dampen your pillow. He’s better than you would be, brown eyes watching you patiently from the pillow next to yours. He knows you need to cry it out.

“I hate seeing you so wound up over this,” he murmurs once you’ve calmed. His thumb is still moving steadily over your skin. “You’re making it ten times worse in your head, lovely girl.” 

You make a hum of dissent, and despite your exhaustion another tear dribbles onto the bridge of your nose. “There’s no way around it,” you say, whispering to avoid a squeak in your voice. “I can’t just never talk to people.” 

“But you don’t have to do it all at once.” There’s a slight indent in Remus’ forehead, but aside from that his face is gentle and kind. He believes in you. “We can take baby steps, work up to the scary stuff.” 

“I can’t.” You sound pathetic to your own ears, but Remus only tsks.

“Yeah you can, dove. You can talk to people, and meet new ones, I know you can.” He shifts his head slightly on the pillow, waiting until you look at him. “You met me.” 

Your lips give a tug. That was easy. James had practically forced the two of you together. “You’re nice, though,” you say, “and quiet. You were never hard to talk to.” 

Remus gives you a fond look. “There are other nice and quiet people out there.” 

“Not like you.” 

He rolls on top of you, groaning in a shoddy attempt to cover his amusement. “Perhaps not,” he allows, and when you sigh he imitates it sympathetically, dropping his chin to your chest. “Still, some might come close. Not everyone is rude and loud.” 

“I’ve seen no evidence to the contrary.” You pick up a piece of hair from over his ear, curling it around your finger. “Look at Sirius.” 

“If Sirius represents humanity, then we’re all fucked.” He turns his head to kiss the inside of your wrist. You’re trying to distract from the original topic, and Remus knows it. “You make a good point, dove. If you can handle Sirius, talking to anyone else will be a breeze.” 

You look away, sulky. Remus chuckles. He reaches up to scratch lightly at your scalp. “Let me help you with the small things,” he bargains, voice downy-soft and soothing, “and when you’re ready for the bigger stuff, I’ll be there with a hug for after. Okay?” 

Your sigh is hefty enough to ruffle the ends of his hair. “You can’t just come with me and hold my hand?” you ask, only partly teasing. 

Remus’ smile shows he can tell. “Afraid not, sweetheart, but don’t worry. You’re braver than you think. I know you can do just fine on your own.”

#remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x fem!reader #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x self insert #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fic #remus lupin hurt/comfort #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin scenario #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin oneshot #marauders #marauders fanfiction #marauders fandom #the marauders #hp marauders #marauders era #marauders x reader #tw anxiety

[jenosjarofjam]

Now, you're stuck with me forever

Alpha jeno x Omega fem!reader

-Rivals/enemies to lovers

Requested ✔️ @no-romance-for-me-please

Word count: 2k+word.

Warning: smut,abo stuff, a lot I mean a lot of slick, squirting, knotting, cussing, biting/marking, mention of scent, nicknames(princess, good girl, etc...)

An note! This is like my first one shot and abo so hopefully this is not too bad🤞.(I took some prompts idea from Tumblr.)I didn't really dive deep into the rival/enemies part.

Playlist: collide-Justine Skye, Best lover-BiBi

You took the same class with Jeno, both of you were the top 10 students in the whole uni. You vividly remember the first year you met Jeno, Jeno always sat next to you, taunting you when he got higher grades. On the other hand, you studied extra hard because of it, surprisingly Jeno still got a higher grade than you. This went on for months, until the professor decided to pair both of you up for a huge project, now you have no choice but work with him. You guys started texting each other, deadline of the project was approaching, you agreed on letting Jeno into your place to help on the project, another led to another, now he crashes into your place whenever he wants

9:34 a.m

Jeno: Can I come over I’m bored……

Y/n : Since when did you started asking?

Jeno:I’m just trying to be nice rn, I’ll bring you food.

Y/n:awwwwwwwwww are you showing affection to me rn?

Jeno: I want to wrap my hands around your throat, and choke you until the life in your eyes die down.

Y/n: kinky ;)

Jeno: stfu, u freak

Jeno was sitting on the couch, finalising the project while you ate your food. The presence of him was distracting you , you seem to be confused about the reason… but hey no one’s complaining when there’s free food.

You noticed the sun peeking through the curtains, sun ray hitting Jeno’s face, highlighting his features. He’s skin glowed under the sun, his eyes shimmered hazel, his nose- “Hey! Are you even listening to me?Hello? Earth to Y/n?” A voice abrupted your thoughts, you realised you have been unconsciously starring at him, your face blushed in embarrassment about being caught. “Were you starring at me?” He cocked his eyebrow in disbelief, “no- no way why would I be starring at you! You’re.. ugly.” Well that was a lie….. “You’re avoiding eye contac with me? Why’s that?” He grins in enjoyment watching you suffer. “No. NO why would I do that.” “Maybe because you’re into me?” He said poking fun at you. “ wha-what no no no…” “well, you’re looking at me like you want to murder me but also like…you want me.” He smirked, seeing your widened eyes. "*cough* umm I'm gonna go uhh get some water." You said, as you quickly walked to the kitchen. You let out a sigh, feeling like you lost your breathe just the moment before. You felt... feverish, oddly... horny.

You went back talking with Jeno, it still doesn't help the fact that you're thinking about getting pounded by a particular person. The uncomfortable stickiness between your thighs was borderline painful, you tried to ease the pain by crossing your legs...it didn't work. You spaced out looking into Jeno's eyes. "Hey... You should take a rest, you seem tired today," "Yeah..um yeah sorry I'll uh go to my room and get some rest, call me when you need anything." You responded, feeling the awkward tension in the room rise up. Little did you know, your scent was flaring up like crazy, the mix of raspberry jam and cherry blossom was putting off Jeno, the sweet smell of slick was oozing out of your panties, making it awfully hard for Jeno to keep his instincts and not to fuck you senselessly. You scurried off to your room, feeling overwhelmed to the brim. You started researching about random heats, trying to find the reason the sudden neediness. You came across an article about spontaneous heats.

Spontaneous heats-Though rare, there is a phenomenon called Spontaneous Heat, which is when an Omega goes into heat outside of their cycle. The rare cases where it happens include meeting one's perfect match (at which point both heat and rut begin almost immediately)

No way Lee Jeno was destined to be your mate, but you can’t deny he is dreadfully hot, but you definitely didn’t stand a chance to be with him.

All these mix signals are just throwing you over the edge.In spite of that, all you should be worrying right now is about the fact that you’re craving the feeling of Jeno’s dick sliding in and out of you.

You had to find a way to relief the pain, ignoring the fact Jeno is probably outside your room playing video games, you slipped your hand under your panties, stimulating your clit. You bite down on your pillow, trying to muffle your moans.

Jeno was standing outside your room, the scent of a sweet aroma slipping through the door crack is driving him insane. The sound of muffled moans , made it obvious you were touching yourself. The thought of marking you, letting everyone know you’re his. The desire to breed you, filling up your pussy with his cum. How pretty you’ll look when he fucks you until you’re senseless . He feels his body burning, blood rushing to his cock, he couldn’t get you off his mind the entire day, he was just craving to fuck you all day long . Jeno couldn’t hold it anymore, he knew damn way he wanted you, all the pretending was driving him mad.

As you were approaching your high, you closed your eyes and focused on the climax. Yougot so lost in the pleasure, you didn’t even notice that someone was standing in front of your doorway.

"Always so needy for me, having fun without me huh?" You quickly cover yourself, your face burned up in embarrassment, you stared at Jeno and his very prominent erection, the size of his bulge was huge , the sheer thought of it already makes you mouth water, you wondered how it’ll feel in your hand,or even in your tight pussy. “What you looking at?” Jeno interrupts your line of thoughts, but it doesn’t make it better. He's low raspy voice sends chills down your spine. He slowly walks to your bed, kneeling down and staring into your doe-eyes, you quickly turned your head away from his stare, he quickly leans closer, closer to the point you feel his breathe against yours " I asked you y/n, what are you looking at?”. Jeno realises how stupid this is, and pulls away, before you pull him by the collar, his lips crashes into yours, the hunger you both crave for each other is finally getting satisfied, his hands naturally went around your waist as he pulls you closer, goosebumps swarming every part of your body. He pulls away "do you want me to stop?” he asked, trying to reassure you wanted this. You hurriedly answered, longing for more “just the opposite, please” He pushes you on to the bed, now you’re under him.

“Submit yourself,” he demanded, “jeno-” “What did you call me?” he abruptly shouted, making you jolt from the unexpected behaviour. “I’m sorry, al-alpha.” he slowly pulled down your flimsy shorts along with your pink panties, the cold hands made you squirm away from his touch. He quickly put his hands on your hips and pull you in, “Let me take care of you, let me make you feel good, let me make you mine,” he whispers into your ears before he forcefully lifts your head up, now you’re staring at him. He’s eyes filled with lust, the dark orbs felt like they were burning holes in yours. He takes off his shirt, his toned abs, arms bulging with veins, looks just like a wet dream in sight. He spreads your legs further apart, slotting his head between your legs. He started licking your hole, not letting a single drop of slick going to waste, before adding two fingers into your leaking hole, slick dripping to his chin, his nose bumping onto your clit adding the extra sensation, making you moan like crazy. “Fuck, you taste so sweet, taste like mine,”he mumbled, the sound of slurping echoes in your ear, your hand naturally find its way down to his head, you grip firmly on his hair, tugging it slightly letting him know your getting close to your climax. The high he brought you was like shockswaves crashing into you, you arch your back gripping harder onto his hair, you let a breathy gasp as you came all over his face.

“I’m not done with you, yet." His eyes darkened as you reached your hands towards him, freeing his cock out of his confinement, it spring out hitting his abdomen. It was huge, far from the ones you've taken before. He slowly lift your legs up, pushing the tip in you, the stretch was painfully good, you unconsciously clenched around him making him groan, your slick coating his dick making it easier for him to fit. He gave you time to adjust to his length then he slowly thrusted into you. “Fuck- take it like a good omega that you are.” The new feeling of adrenaline came rushing in, your eyes rolled back when he hit the spot that made you see stars. He lets out a low breathy grunt , your creamy velvety walls sucking him in deeper, the tight fit making you feel every inch of him, every single veins dragging in and out of your pussy. He started thrusting in a merciless rhythm, he grabbed your jaw and kissed you roughly, his tongue swirled against yours, the passionate kiss turned into a messy make-out session. His warm lips taking over you, pussy gushing over his dick. "Alpha, I'm close-" you choked out "please, fill me up please.", you feel like time slowed, each thrust felt so sensitive, so good, you feel your vision blurring, the knot in your stomach snapped, you let a long lewd moan as you cum on Jeno's dick. Jeno kept thrusting, ignoring your whines. "Hmm, too much?? Too much for my omega? You were begging for it, you were begging me to fill you up right?? Good girl's keep their promises baby." The sensitivity was too much, you feel your eyes tearing up, you kept clenching on his girth, forming a creamy white ring around the base of his cock.

Jeno used his strength and flip you around, his big hands holding onto your hips, “ass up princess.” You obeyed, feeling a sharp slap on your butt, he swify pushes back in with a one quick thrust. "Plea-se knot- in me al-pha, please, wanna be full of your pups." You pleaded, the thought of being by each other's side everyday, carrying his child, was the best fucking dream ever. "Fuck- You want me to knock you up- huh? Such a slut, such a slut for me. Fuck I'm cumming." He grunted. Jeno grabbed your hair pulling it aside, exposing your bare neck and collarbones, Jeno put his nose on your neck, inhaling your sweet aroma. "Can I mark you- princess, wanna make you mine-" He asked, waiting to get a permission to forever mark you his. "Mark me please, alpha mark me!" Jeno licked the side of your neck, and bit down on it, he licked the blood that was oozing out of the mark. You screamed in pain, but the idea of being his was enough for you to bare the pain. Jeno kept thrusting in you, you feel like your were about to pass out, a new feeling rushed in, not like your typical orgasm. Your now breathy moans echoed the room along with the slapping sound of the skin, you screamed in pleasure as you squirted all over his abs. "S-shit , that was so hot, I'm so close princess." He growled, liquid dripping down your thighs. His thrusts became more sloppy, the raspy low grunts was starting to become smoky moans. You feel his dick twitched in you. He held you closer, gripping onto you harder. With a final push, his knot inflamed, hot white cum covering your walls, you whimpered from the knot's pain. The feeling was way too addictive that you can barely feel the pain now. Jeno lays on you for a few seconds, you can feel his warm breathe against your neck. It took a few seconds for him to recover from his orgasm, he finally broke the silence

"How are you feeling?" He asked genuinely, "Tired and confused...I thought you never liked me..." "Idiot, why would I not like you." "No shit Sherlock, you acted like you hated my guts." You argued

"Well now you're stuck with me forever."

#jeno smut #jeno x reader #nct hard thoughts #lee jeno #jenosjarofjamfics #nct dream smut #nct smut #lee jeno smut #jeno simps

[mediumgayitalian]

fic rec friday 16

hi!! welcome to fic rec friday. every week, i pick five fics i have bookmarked and rec them with a little review. check them out!

best friend, baby by @ghosttotheparty*

“You— You make me feel so… good,” he finishes lamely, his head void of any words that could describe it, because how can Will describe the peace he finds in Nico’s presence, or the way he feels like he can finally breathe whenever Nico looks into his eyes? “You’re my favourite person,” he breathes. “My best friend.”

hooooooo boy the intimacy tag was NOT joking. i was gagged. yall tell me all the time how high u value will angst and like....this one DEVASTATED me for him??? like do yall ever think about how the first dialogue we hear from will in nico's perspective is self-loathing. yall ever think about how nico has always known him hating himself. well this author did. "i know you hate yourself but just because you hate yourself doesnt mean everyone else does too" hey what if we FOUGHT. also im going back in to all my FRFs to star my FAVE FAVE FAVE fics bc this is one of them LET ME TELL YOU.

2. just a dumb game by @ghosttotheparty

Nico di Angelo is not a party person. But Will Solace is going to be there. So.

they are SO FUCKING GAY and SO FUCKING IN LOVE and SO FUCKING STUPID. god i love them so fucking bad like they are inherently down bad obsessed with each other and this is how they should be. this is the way of the world.

3. even in the silver light by @ghosttotheparty

Nico is back. Will is still smitten.

first of all. latino and nb will. thank you. second of all. i am (obviously) obsessed with this author bc they KILLLLLL w burning intimacy. like you have no idea they write them like there is a twice burning fire only alive within them it's CRAZZZYYY. i also fckn LOVE that this is like. okay so the author says its plotless and it is kind of 45k of plotless, yes, but idk theres something to be said of love as a plot?? of learning and loving each other as a storyline.

4. splash by @ghosttotheparty

Annabeth is reading her favourite book. Someone walks directly into her.

yeah okay i think this is another one author week. sue me. this fic made me GRIN okay. it was so fucking cute and sweet and soft and autistic annabeth my beloved!! my love and light!! they are so in love in every universe fr and i fckn LOVE them dude i am OBSESSED. when this author writes people together it's as if you can hear them click.

5. isnt she lovely by @ghosttotheparty

Their eyes always meet in the halls. Her eyes are grey and shiny, and they make Percy think of stormy skies and marble sculptures. (She could be a marble sculpture, in the entrance of a museum, surrounded by scholars and artists and mesmerised passersby. Fucking beautiful in a way that only art ever is.) - - - Percy has had a crush on Annabeth since eighth grade. (He doesn’t know she likes him too.)

percy hitting the ground when annabeth kisses him 😭😭 HES SO REAL. i just recced this fic on instagram and i am here reccing it again bc it is EXCELLENT. i rly rly love to see pjotv percabeth in fic like i DO. theyre so fucking cute. and i LOVE how this author writes autistic annabeth!! it is so important to me!!! and this one is so CUTE like percy had such a huge crush on him.....like not just he liked her he had a CRUSH on her. god. i am melting.

thank you for joining me this friday!! happy reading!!

#i dont have an excuse for how late this is im sorry i fell asleep at Seven Fucking PM Last Night #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo #heroes of olympus #pjo hoo toa #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percy jackson/annabeth chase #percy/annabeth #annabeth/percy #percabeth #pjotv #nico di angelo #will solace #nico di angelo/will solace #nico/will #will/nico #solangelo #will solace angst #latino will solace #non binary will solace #autistic annabeth chase #fic rec #fic rec friday #FRF #longpost

[tryingtofindava]

i saw the tyler fic u did where instead of him being impale, it was his gf! do you think u could do that but with aiden’s gf and the ceiling? 🫶

── SHE HIT THE FLOOR! NEXT THING YOU KNOW!

{[AIDEN CLARK X FEM! READER]}

A/N: is the title lyrics from Low by Flo Rida? Yes. Do I think I’m hilarious for this? Also yes.

: ̗̀➛Back to Source

Covering Ashlyn’s ears with your own shaking hands as she trembles from the crazily loud bangs coming from Taylor’s shotgun.

Watching as she shoots the ever loving fuck out of the creepy massive centipede. “… Yeah, uh- Tay, it stopped moving.” Aiden nodded with an uncomfortably big smile, though his semi assuring words fell upon deaf ears.

Giving her a thumbs up as he’s crouched right beside you while you help Ash, having a hand on your shoulder and giving you light squeezes to comfort you or himself, you couldn’t tell.

Taylor upon taking notice that creature is in fact dead…. Hopefully… She lowers the gun as Logan comes up behind her, grabbing her shaking hand soothingly. “We need to hurry in case it recovers.” He spoke reassuringly to the panting Taylor.

Watching the others rummage around the small office while you stood watch at the doorway, was a stressful experience having to keep watch to make sure no phantoms got in and keeping watch over Tyler (who was getting patched up by Ben).

.And no one could find the keys… “Where are they?!” Taylor seethed, slamming shut another keyless drawer.

“Coach must’ve moved them again!” The brunette complained while starting to sigh through another drawer. “Does he move them often?” Ashlyn asked doing her own searching.

“Yeah, because idiots like Jay and Conner keep messing with them!” She scoffed. You would’ve giggled at Taylor being so frustrated for what seems like the first time ever if it wasn’t for your current situation.

You were leaning against Aiden who was fiddling with his army knife, flicking the blade out and flicking it back. “I feel a minor sense of Deja-vu.” He murmured in your ear while smiling to himself. It never failed to amaze you how your boyfriend could always smile no matter what was going on around him. “We have 3 minutes left,..” Logan called out.

Ashlyn perked up at a certain sound her super hearing picked up on, she looked over at you and Aiden. “Guys, there’s a straggler.” Carrot-top warned. Aiden sniggers, nudging you “Yeah, I can hear it running.”

And with that he stabbed the smiling demon monster right in the face, making you cringe at the disgusting squelch sound it made pulling the knife out of the phantoms face. “Got it!” Aiden hummed enthusiastically, skipping over to Ash to show her the black substance it left on his knife.

She of course rolled her eyes, ignoring the blondes antics, her eyes falling back to you. “Is there anymore, Y/n?” She quipped in curiosity.

You peaked out the door, looking left and then right. “Uhhh… nope, we’re good.” You answered, looking over your shoulder at her.

The walls and ground shook, “Huh…?” You mutter to yourself in confusion. “EVERYONE GET UNDER SOMETHING!” You heard someone yell, you were too busy keeping yourself balanced to register anything else in the moment.

POP

The last thing you saw was Aiden reaching out to you, before the ceiling collapsed. “Y/N!” He shrieked, racing towards you. That’s when it all went black.

“C’mon! Get her under the table!” Taylor helped Aiden carry you to the table, everyone crawling under it. Logan, Ben and Taylor hiding under the desk on the other side of the room.

Aiden cradled your body in his arms, rocking back and fourth with he was staring at your face in horror. Blood was leaking from your forehead, and it was also trickling from your nose.

Aiden was on the verge of tears as she wiped the blood from your nose, that’s when he noticed your eyes were wide open and an unsettling grin stretched across your face.

In the real world Aiden shoots up from his sleeping spot, looking around the room until his eyes fell on your shaking form. “Y/N!” He yelled out again. Which caught the attention from the adults in the room over, including your parents/parental figure.

Before he could even get to you, the adults were already around you. Trying to assist your violently thrashing form. You coughed and wheezed, “I’m okay! I’m fine!” You assured the adults, while also trying to calm your heart and and breathing. “-M okay, really…!”

Aiden pounced on you, hugging you tightly, muttering incoherent words while pressing small pecks to your hair and forehead. You leaned into his touch, tears welling up in your own eyes just like his own.

“Don’t scare me like that again.” It was the first time you’ve ever heard him sound so serious…

#school bus graveyard x reader #sbg x reader #aiden clark x reader #aiden clark x fem reader #school bus graveyard x fem reader #tyler hernandez x reader #ashlyn banner x reader #logan fields x reader #ben clark x reader #taylor hernandez x reader

[gingerbreadmonsters]

organ music + writing about vampires is a classic for a reason

#it just....... look its just great #honestly i would say go for the whole cliche and really lean into it #just put 'toccata and fugue in d minor' into youtube and let it happen #or something funky like organ covers of the castlevania ost #organ music just fucking slaps is what im saying #yeah i get it. its a church-y instrument and a lot of organ music is strongly associated w christian hymns and festivals and stuff #but i promise you there is more to organ music than just that #also like..... even if u are not christian. u can listen to that shit just for fun yk #because 1. you do not have to listen to a version w words (and also sometimes the words are in latin so u can't understand it anyway) #2. you can think the sound of the music is cool without necessarily agreeing to anything else that comes with it #3. dude have you HEARD how epic this instrument sounds. u r missing out on some awesome stuff #anyone can listen to whatever music they like. its not sacrilegious to hear a religious song if u are not part of that religion its fine

[soldier-poet-king]

'have you ever had a normal series of thoughts in your life?'

no. today a friend made a lighthearted remark in jest to lift my spirits and objectively i KNEW that and told them i appreciated it but also then went off on a long tangent about my inability to trust said jest at face value because im incapable of not taking everything both extremely literally and seriously, while also prying apart every single possible angle or connotation of the simplest sentences just in case i miss some significant moral or factual implication.

my kid brother had to ask everyone in the family pre-written survey questions as part of his homework last night which turned into a whole affair because i physically cannot answer with a simple agree/disagree/i dont know to each statement because they don't take into account xyz facts or they don't give enough information about the situation and various implications would change my answer drastically.

in other news, every single survey, diagnostic question, medical intake form, etc. is Literal Hell to me because the questions are not clear and specific enough for me to factor in every possibility and give a truthful answer and i can't just give the answer they want or that im 'supposed' to give because that wouldn't be the true answer! it would be lying! and there's no option to give a full 'well technically......' explanation of my answers!

#the duality of fran #i am no longer asking if i am neurodivergent #APPARENTLY THIS ISNT NORMAL #which like. until i was in my early 20s\ #deadass just thought everyone thought like this #HOW CAN YOU BE BLASE ABOUT THE LACK OF CONTEXT IN DIAGNOSTIC QUESTIONS #u know the post about autism screening and the one about do you have difficulty wearing socks #i personally do not have sock issues. but the overthinking and literal interpretations of said questions #YEAH ME TOO #also u can see why. from a religious perspective. i have ocd and am hyper scrupulous #and why confession is literally just the obsessive mechanism for what if over explanations #and i am physically incapable of seeing it as a method of grace #it is a MENTAL TRAP THAT CAUSES ANXIETY BECAUSE I MIGHT LIE AND I HAVE TO EXPLAIN LITERALLY AND THOROUGHLY #who the fuck can just take things at face value #i mean what i say. i mean everything SO intently all the time. that's WHY i have to explain thoroughly #what if someone took my words at face value without an explanation and therefore misinterpreted them #ABSOLUTELY CANNOT BE ALLOWED TO HAPPEN

[iceeericeee]

I wonder how many tags i can add on to this

#there must be SOME kind of a limit otherwise posts would get suuuuuuper duper long like is it just 30? #idk but i'm going to find out by simply maxxing out the character limit for each tag and finding out the limit of tags for each post lololo #this is gonna be great. i just have to remember to type without ever using the comma. it shouldn't be too hard right? fuck i almost typed #the comma i'm already bad at this smh my head. also if your still here i commend you. you have a better attention span than i do. #i'm already starting to get bored holy shit this is not happening. i gotta power through this. FOR SCIENCEEEEEEEEEE. or somethinggggggggggg #but fr idk what else to say. maybe just saying that i don't know what to say will be good enough? but does that even count? #I don't even know anymore. ffffffffuck. this is gonna be a while huh? also holy shit if you're still here omg u deserve like. a prize or #something because u definitely didn't have to stay and read all of this bull shit. lololol i typed out bs but decided to just spell the who #thing out just to make it go by faster. i'm so lazy. this is only the nineth tag HOW will i make it to 30. i am sobbing the adhd is adhding #very hard rn. are you still here? bruh this is insane. i have somehow managed to keep ur attention this long and it's just me spouting #absolute balderdash. wait do you know what balderdash even means? i don't care if you do already i'm gonna tell you anyway. balderdash is #basically just another word for nonsense. boom. you learned something new today. balderdash equals nonsense equals this damn post. #why did i decide to do this in the first place. it was a dumb idea. i don't know if i can even keep going. this is only the *counts tags* #it's the 14th tag. we've got a long way to go boys. men. soldiers. comrads. friends. besties peeps. marshmallows. #where was i going with this? oh yeah. trying to max out the limit for tags. dang i almost typed a comma there. i haven't done that since #i think the third or fourth tag. dang that feels like such a long time ago. not for you guys probably. it feels longer because i have to li #type it all out and stuff. so it's definitely gonna feel longer for me. are you still here? good lord don't you have better things to #be doing than reading all of this? we're already on tag number 18. it feels like i should be on the thirtyeth by now. or however it's spell #'toast' you might be wondering 'why are you typing out the names of the numbers instead of say '9' or '5'?' well you see. young one. #this is a strategy i'm using to make each tag slightly longer. even if i don't know how to spell it. it'll make it just a little bit longer #anyway. i got off topic. not that there was ever a topic to begin with. unless it's about making this as long as i can. #which i am apparently good at doing. i guess. are you STILL here? do you seriously have nothing to do? i guess i'm flattered you stayed thi #whole time. instead of reading something else you stayed here. with me. listening to me talk. on the twenty-third tag. oh yeah its tag 23 #except now it's tag twenty-four. how crazy is that. this little talk is almost over. only 6 tags away if memory serves right. this's strang #i kind of don't want this to end. but i know it should. after all there is a limit. but all things must come to and end at some point i gue #i'm running out of things to say. it's probably a good thing it's almost over. hahahahah............... but i don't want to go. i don't wan #to leave this post. i've worked so hard on it. and for what. just for it to end. are you still here? yes? good. i'd hate to end this alone. #thank you for indulging me and my craziness. the end is only 2 tags away now. you can go ahead and leave. i'll be okay on my own. really... #...you're still here? i- i don't know what to say. i suppose a toast is in order. perhaps. for this journey. this stupid dumb post i though #would be fun. i'll make it short. it's the last tag after all. this was fun. but i will never do it again. so long as a i live. i'll miss y

[asummersday]

when will my writing motivation return from the war 😭

#please i just wanna post the next chapter #or at the very least start a oneshot or do literally anything #ive been more tired than usual and i dont like that #im ALWAYS so so tired #sometimes YEAH its because im up til 3 or even 4 #but ive also slept 9 hours. 12 hours. and yet ill STILL feel so tired #im too tired to do the things i want to do #and then i feel like ive just wasted my whole day :((( #how many times these past few weeks have i said im gonna get this chapter done huh? and it is NOT done #i love creating and writing but it takes so much energy sometimes :((( and i just dont have it :((( #i feel bad/down -> writing would help me feel better -> too tired/unmotivated to write -> doesnt write -> keeps feeling bad #rinse and repeat lmao #sometimes being nice to urself and waiting for the motivation doesnt work #sometimes u gotta sit at ur desk with a massive mug of coffee and say ''i will WRITE if its the last thing i fucking do'' #screw quality its time to write WORDS #anyway. im making myself coffee rn. i will get through this dammit #summer post

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

rude as hell of my goofy ass brain for depriving me of dopamine surges because i didn't attain arbitrary card goals today

#text #personal #writing #nano #nano2023 #wf #like yeah okay two cards was a Lot for a Family Holiday (derogatory) #BUT COME ON WE WROTE THREE AND A FUCKING HALF THOUSAND WORDS ABOUT IT AND WE HAD FUN!!!!!! #but no no we didnt finish a card so no dopamine rush for u #gee thanks goofy ass brain appreciate it 🙄 #anyway im no longer sure if i can finish this book by the end of tomorrow lmao #MAYBE but like. itll be a Push (i have 3.5 cards remaining and i have not yet broken more than 2 in a day) #but i do think the last two will be Shorties #i think im ALMOST done with this one #i think the next one MAYBE can be shorty #and i dont have to go to work about it #would LOVE to be done before Saturday because saturday is birds morning #would love to come home and crash and sleep through all sunday #im close im having fun im so so sleepy

[youngestdaughtersyndrome]

sitting in bed eating cheese absolutely stewing

#so im doing the dishes and heard a knock on the door right. and bc both my parents r downstairs i answer it #and guess fucking what? its the guy i literally switched out of french to avoid because he kept asking me super invasive questions #so im like What the fuck do u want. and he starts this whole pity story about how he was soooo worried when i kept disappearing from school #and how id sometimes come back with bruises and never explained anything to him so he had 'no choice' but to FIND MY ADDRESS and check in #his words btw. this boy told me to my FACE that me having a private life FORCED him to stalk me to my fucking home #and i just saw RED. good thing is that when i get mad i get icy and brutal so i spent five minutes telling this thick skulled idiot that #he has no right to know anything abt me that i didnt tell him and you know what he does???? #this audacious motherfucker says Lets not do this on the porch. and then tries to push his way into my fucking house. thats a hard no for me #so i told him exactly what was gonna happen: he was either going to get off my property and stay away from me or i would call the cops #and remove him by force. id like to say that i literally said he had ten seconds to leave or id start throwing punches #and he goes .... Cant we just talk abt this 🥺??? so i break his nose. and i was within my legal rights to do so bc he was trespassing soooo #yeah anyways i just cannot fucking BELIEVE the entitlement and audacity of some ppl. like its my fucking life i dont have to tell u shit !!! #what the fuck!!! why do they always think im playong hard to get like ffs leave me ALONE #so that was my night 😙✌️ i hope he dies ! #hollyws

[cherrysnax]

oi actually one last thing and then u can whack me with sticks… whenever I don’t know what to draw, I usually just doodle random faces but more often than not they look like my girlfriend :’D

#in fact Chevys influenced my style a lot idk how to explain it #when we first started dating admittedly I drew them sooooo much #and like even before they would always watch me draw I see to do like private streams for them and Blake #less private streams more just something in the bg while we all talked for days straight #:’) #but yeah when I first started dating chevy I was so happy I legit forgot how to draw #but the few things I could draw were us together because we were long distance at the time #I don’t draw them as much because I’m busy putting like. our brain baby on the page #we’re being these fucks to life together. but idk. maybe it’s the way one character laughs or smiles #or the way another’s brows furrow when they get angry #how another character crosses their arms sassily it’s all just shadows of chevy #and me ofc because I’m self centered #but yeah helps that chevy really brings these characters to life with the movements and acting they do #god if u could just see them #oh my god I was typing so fast my phone went into driving mode wtf #but yeah wow im. gay. so much of this is subconscious yk. I have trouble saying these things out loud #not out of a lack of wanting to im just. not good with words. i #I just hope it shows yknow #ur yeah wow okay that was a lot idk why I’m crying

[lunarhoneybunny]

sighs. okay tmi posting sorry guys

#lunar bunny chatter #my horniness has been fluctuating the last day or so and it's definitely because of my period. this morning was crazy #i went to some DMs to listen to an audio message i got and i just died again and thought about some stuff which led me back onto tumblr #and i just went to look at some text posts and now that i look back. dude i have such an atrocious daddy/mommy kink it's actually funny #i mean. i really like the idea of being an appealing figure and my criteria for who i call daddy is so specific. there's just two people #that fall into that category but i don't like the other person as much as the other one. hi sorry for being gay i need this off of my chest #also hanging out with some friends and im so bad at comebacks and all that. how the fuck am i gonna top without stuttering and fumbling #and forgetting words.... that's my biggest worry. it doesn't help that i get super chatty when nervous but maybe i can work it in my favor #i wanna try out the title stuff just to test the waters before going absolutely ham. maybe as a cute joke i'll go “oh sure w/e u say daddy” #“lol haha” but it just seems real fun. i think it's hot too but. yeah it's a lot to unpack ahaha. #i still have a lot of guilt for talking dirty and being more brave when talking but that's just because i always felt like i didn't have... #the right to explore that especially when a lot of people i knew back then thought of me as “pure and innocent girl” and like. yeah fuck no #this was a really meandering ramble but my point: “daddy hot mommy hot i wanna explore that and im also nervous about stuff” #i do genuinely enjoy when i get in the mood though especially with someone i trust and like. click with? i hope that isn't too much to say #but it feels very natural and i don't have to force or hide anything. i just need a bit more confidence ahaha #that's all the rambling i got in me im gonna listen to some classic music from latin artists because im silly and mildly sentimental rn.

[southislandwren]

fuck i just proofread my friend's research so she could submit it to a journal and i forgot how much i love proofreading :((

#memus do u remember we used to proofread the squad's essays for funsies. i miss that. didnt realize i would miss that #also the research fucked i actually understood what was happening. so many research articles im like #you wrote all this down but you didnt actually say any real words. i still have no clue what you actually did #so very cool to hear about what my friend is doing and actually understand it #although i guess im biased because shes dairy manufacturing so like. of course i knew what the words she was saying meant #also i love writing papers i will say i kind of miss humanities classes #school post #everyone says im really good at essays and im like YEAH i go feral for a well written summary or analysis or argument #also my mom is an english college professor. i didnt have a choice. i was always going to be good at writing and reading #also i think its funny ive got two mutuals i have nicknames for and its memus (blushingjuliet) and memer (memerataphor) #sorry if you two have been getting confused heehee. symptom of being friends with me

[springcatalyst]

*banging on your door* I'D LIKE TO HEAR ABOUT JULIAN, LILIANA, UND BROOKE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.

What are their final thoughts in the dark silence of night before they sleep? How do they sleep?

How do they choose their clothes when purchasing and dressing?

What is a fear that they cannot pull themselves away from? They need it, and they hate it.

OMG HELLO HI HELLOOOOOOOO i am taking ur coat like a victorian gentleman and inviting u inside.  These are so specific and dramatic i love

AHEM

-

Sleep, rather, the moments right before it, is when a person is at their truest.  You can’t really hide from it.  So those final thoughts are typically a lens into the basal forms that make up a character.

Liliana is a character that’s very true, very genuine, so her sleeping mind doesn’t show much that you wouldn’t expect, because there’s not a lot that she hides, at least not from herself.  She’s obsessive: stuck (though ‘stuck’ implies that she’s here by some force other than her own) in this quest that she’s been trailing for years, getting closer but not in any way that’s tangible.  She goes to sleep with ‘what next’ floating around in her skull, and dreams of a goal reached.  And she sleeps like the dead, but only because she puts it off for as long as she can.  Not that she avoids sleep itself, though, rather she stays up and works until she can’t stay upright anymore.  She is laser-focused, set on her task.  It can benefit her, in certain conditions, but mostly it leaves her running on so little sleep she has trouble functioning. Her being a satyr means her sleep schedule doesn’t quite align with a ‘typical’ one anyway, but she definitely fucks it more and also that’s not set in stone atm.

Julian, on the other hand, is a liar and he hides just about everything about himself, including from himself.  Julian and Liliana are similar in a lot of ways but this is not one of them.  So his unconscious truth doesn’t always align with what he appears to be.  It’s careful.  It’s somatic: a sort of ‘is the door locked is the knife within reach is the cane by the bed,’ but it’s also theoretical: more a ‘who here do I trust (in the most basic sense of the word) or who do I watch out for.’  He absolutely is the impulsive asshole he looks like, but the little bit of careful caution that remains beneath plays a role in his continued safety (relatively speaking).  Julian is also a pretty light sleeper, growing up with five siblings (lmao) there’s a good amount of noise in the mornings or if something is wrong at night, so he’s just kind of grown accustomed to waking up, even if it’s that barely-awake state, to evaluate the noise.  And he rises with the sun- mostly old habit, but it’s also convenient for guaranteeing some time unobserved, for safety or just for some quiet.

Brooke is different in that the thing that follows her into sleep isn’t as much a thought as it is a feeling.  Brooke spends a lot of time busy, not necessarily with the intent of keeping her mind securely in the present, but that’s the effect it has, no matter.  So when she isn’t doing something- following or fighting or helping or hurting -she gets that little moment of quiet calm and it’s occupied by guilt.  The weight of it kind of lingers above her, the knowledge of what she was a part of, the remembrance of what she’s constantly trying to undo.  Brooke lives in the shadow of a debt to repay, and it catches up to her when she has a moment of still.  She is an uneasy sleeper, heavy to the ongoings of the waking world, but she rarely sleeps straight through the night, nevertheless.  She doesn’t dream, just wakes with the feeling that she did, even as it evades her. 

-

I feel like this is already so long and that’s just the first thing but like, you gave me the opportunity so I’m taking it <3.  Choice of fashion is a little less dramatic but I’m sure I’ll find a way to make it anyway.  Clothing basically serves three functions: utility, expression, and comfort.  For the sake of character designs I usually focus on the first two unless it’s particularly relevant, which it isn’t for these three so much. 

Brooke is mostly utility.  She has casualwear, of course, but honestly I haven’t really designed much of it and usually just draw her in her armor.  Which is pretty obviously utile, but it’s also familiar.  She keeps this leather armor, embossed around the edges (that I’ll actually design and make mean something eventually but... not yet apparently) and either similar or just the same to the kind she wore with her family, their guild.  Familiar isn’t always a good thing, but it’s all she knows.  If I’m being real she’s still being developed, especially storyline specifics, so not a lot is decided.  I’ve thought about switching around the colors, the blue I typically give her can be a changed version, removed from its ties to before, which was maybe a gold or a purple, something more implicative of importance.  Or of having her rid herself of the armor completely, so caught up in breaking her bonds that she makes herself vulnerable... but I’m a little too attached to how the armor looks... basically, she’s just balancing the safety of utility with the unrest of something recognizably hunter. 

Liliana is mostly expression.  She doesn’t need anything particular from her clothes, so chooses what makes her feel good.  Nothing too extravagant, because she is still wrecking shit and needs to not be hindered by what she’s wearing, but she dresses to look good and be scary, when the need arises.  She wears dresses and skirts despite the fact that, as a satyr, she really doesn’t... need to?  Because satyrs, post-cataclysm, live closely tied with humans in particular, though fauns as well, depending on locale, and as such have absorbed some social elements of theirs- like clothing and gender norms.  She abides by those norms, gender in particular (to a certain degree), not because she has to but because she wants to- because, you know, trans.  She carries a good amount of things with her on average- swords and knives and lockpicks and money and various other whathaveyous -but rarely carries them all at once, taking them on or off her person whenever she thinks she may or may not need them, but her belt remains on no matter, because that’s what she needs to have any of them at all.  Her compass, too, stays on her at all times, but that’s more sentimentality than use. 

Julian is a bit of both, but with him, a lot of the expression melts over into utility.  The puffy shirts, while inherently pirate out-of-universe, are conveniently the opposite of form-fitting.  They make him look bigger than he is like a cat puffing out, but also hide, you know, trans.  Typically they’re white or otherwise lightly colored, because it’s cheap and function-over-form, but later era when he’s particularly full of himself he trends towards darker colors and black.  Black, as a dye, is expensive to make, so wearing it is a way of making it clear that he is either important or dangerous or both- he strives to command respect or fear and it doesn’t always matter which.  Julian, like Liliana, also carries some stuff with him, but the difference is that he has less, and so almost always has all of them.  The exception is his sword, which is bulky enough to always have that unless he for sure needs it, he’ll leave it in favor of a knife (or two, counting the one in his cane).  And because his right hand is typically occupied by his cane, his things are all strapped to his left, another reason he doesn’t always carry the sword- it gets in the way.  Finally, depending where storyline-wise he is, he wears a couple little gold earrings- mark of a pirate.  Been considering having it be a status thing, too: one for crewmate, two for first mate, three for captain, or something similar. 

-

Fear is a really interesting one.  I dig where you’re going with it, and I’m sure I’m about to exhibit some mental illness, but like, fear is possibly one of the most important things in a character, because it’s what’s really behind at least 90% of a characters’ motivations, isn’t it?

Gotta start with Julian for this one.  He is afraid of a thousand entwined things in a way he will never admit and might not even be aware of.  The way he is perceived is so important to him that he lives with the constant threat of what he’s built for himself being taken away.  He’s so... I can’t call him exactly fake, because it’s not all false... he’s so constructed.  Everything he is, is exaggerated.  He is angry, and impulsive, and fast and rude and detached, but the way those things are presented is curated to be viewed in the way that he wants it to be.  And because of that, because everything he is is built on a not-quite-lie not-quite-truth, he runs the risk of having it all crash down around him.  That’s what follows him: the fear of being seen past it all, because he thinks that with that, he’ll end up right back where he was before.  Not to be too insane but in my silly little character.doc that I have for fun there’s this segment that’s pretty much what I just said:

He is afraid of no longer being taken seriously

He is afraid of losing the image he has created

He is afraid of trust being broken and secrets getting out

He is afraid of being patronized or the subject of pity

He would have you believe he is afraid of nothing

Liliana, now that I’m thinking about it, is actually pretty similar to him.  I didn’t even do this one on purpose oops.  Her difference, though, is that what she is isn’t fake.  She has this legacy, this name, that she reigns- people know of her, she commands that same respect or fear that Julian has to try so hard to.  Part of that, though, is taken from her.  She has her... I don’t want to call it a birthright, because that sounds entitled, but she has her birthright, then it’s stolen from her, and she rebuilds it even as she is on a hunt to reclaim it.  And so her fear stems from the possibility of failure.  If she never reaches her goal, if she truly loses what should never have been taken in the first place, then it’s all been for nothing, not only her work, but her father’s.  And the longer she goes without reaching that finish line, the more she is afraid of ‘what if it’s too late’ and ‘maybe it’s already over.’  Because her failure is also his, what she’d lose is also his, and that’s worse than if she just failed herself, because she feels the need to honor what he built, what he left, and what he was, in his absence.

Brooke is afraid of exactly what you’d expect.  A thousand what you’ve done’s follow her.  She terrified of never making it right, of the possibility of her wrongs being something that she never can make right.  She made a vow and she intends with all her being to keep it, but there is no endgoal, there is no ‘finished.’  It’s constant, and as such the constant threat of failure, of breaking that promise, whether by action or inaction, stays with her.  She lives with it for so long that it begins to leech into her, more than it already was, so it becomes what drives her.  But also... it’s what’s always driven her.  For a long time, she’s driven more by what’s behind her than what’s before her, and all that does is make her steep in this guilt and fear, fighting for a repentance that she doesn’t even know if she deserves. 

-

Okay I’m done being insane now, I hope my fucked up little guys provide enrichment to your enclosure but either way you’ve given me the GIFT of LETTING ME BE ANNOYING so THANK U AGAIN BESTIE. KISSING U KISSING U KISSING U KISSING U K

#ask #ocs #YEAHHHH INSANE ABOUT CHARACTERS YEAH BAYBEYY NORMAL ABOUT OCS #ur literally so real for this. i owe u my life #it took a while cause i had work and even now it is currently 1:31 am and the sunday of finals week but it's FINE #because im having FUN #god. it's so much. i always feel like i write a whole ass essay but like........ you let me do that. so i did that #liliana and julian got that. character foil parallel arc #liliana got that. revenge quest #liliana got that my name is inigo montoya you killed my father prepare to die #brooke got that. she got that all that #eheheh. fucked up little guys. i literally LOVE talking about them you don't understand #mentally well if anyone asks #dont mind the. casual drop that i have a useless word doc that i made just because i felt like it. it is 19 pages long AKJFSHLJKAFJKJD #a bunch of random worldbuilding shit too. the world shapes the characters and the characters shape the world i build around them. its good #dont worry about it. i have a normal amount of worldbuilding in my brain. not at all way too much #this is why i can't work on my FUCKING homework. head full of fantasy environment instead #anyhway. heres this.... yeehaw :)

[bibiana112]

It's like 3:00 we got home before midnight but were already tired and sleeby and I swear I act so tipsy when all I had was regular ass tea just because of what the mix of tired and overstimulated does to my brain

#u think I'm exaggerating but the reason I'm only unwinding now despite getting home relatively early #is cause me and my roomie just sat on the floor talking shit and stuff for hours #and in the middle of that #at some point #I was cry laughing for absolutely no reason after being so unable to string words together that I just repeat dour synonyms #it made it sound like I was having an existential crisis but I'm just tired but my mouth keeps trying to say things 😭 #roomie was like oh but I wish I could talk more I'm running out of energy and all I can communicate is via laugh #and I'm like I wish I could just shut up actually #I wish I wasn't the kind of person you know is doing bad because they're not swinging a thousand thoughts at u or in their head too much #Wish I had the sense to stop prattling if I can't communicate well but if I like the person and am enjoying their company I just. continue #oh no I'm having self recognition through the blorbo at this hour cause I just realized I headcanoned that about Aoi too oh nO #that makes sense fuck I never realized I did that until now #honestly it was embarrassing and roomie was like pfft what? no it's not I'm just awkward and indeed an jour later they cry laughed too #it's not like we were telling good jokes or anything like our brains were just melting so yeah how do I plan on finishing this #I liked the food kind of want to go there again for the gyoza ngl but not at night again there's too many people drinking and no sweets #we finished the meals and wanted dessert but everything had just closed :( #we got all dressed up and shit and not a single picture came out alright lmao #oh also I missed the two people that came with! they're so fun and we hadn't seen each other since y'know rona started #so it was really nice to catch up with them hopefully I'll be classmates w the two again if my transfer fcking goes through alright #Void fala aí