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maniculum · 8 months

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Medieval Scorpions Effortpost

So yesterday I reblogged this post featuring an 11th-century depiction of the Apocalypse Locusts from Revelations, noting the following incongruity as another medieval scorpion issue:

The artist, as you can see, has interpreted "tails like scorpions" as meaning "glue cheerful-looking snakes to their butts".

Anyway, it occurred to me that the medieval scorpion thing might not be as widely known as I think it is, and that Tumblr would probably enjoy knowing about it if it isn't known already. So, finding myself unable to focus on the research I'm supposed to be doing, I decided to write about this instead. I'll just go ahead and put a cut here.

As we can see in the image above, at least one artist out there thought a "scorpion" was a type of snake. Which makes it difficult to draw "tails like scorpions", because a snake's tail is not that distinctive or menacing (maybe rattlesnakes, but they don't have those outside the Americas). So they interpreted "tails like scorpions" as "the tail looks like a whole snake complete with head".

Let me tell you. This is not a problem unique to this illustration.

See, people throughout medieval Europe were aware of scorpions. As just alluded to, they are mentioned in the Bible, and if the people producing manuscripts in medieval Europe knew one thing, it was Stuff In Bible. They're also in the Zodiac, which medieval Europe had inherited through classical sources. However, let's take a look at this map:

That's Wikipedia's map of the native range of the Scorpiones order, i.e., all scorpion species. You may notice something -- the range just stops at a certain northern latitude. Pretty much all of northern Europe is scorpion-free. If you lived in the north half of Europe, odds were good you had never seen a scorpion in your life. But if you were literate or educated at all, or you knew they were a thing, because you'd almost certainly run across them being mentioned in texts from farther south. And those texts wouldn't bother to explain what a scorpion was, of course -- everyone knows scorpions, right? When was the last time you stopped to explain What Is Spiders?

So medieval writers and artists in northern Europe were kind of stuck. There was all this scorpion imagery and metaphor in the texts they liked to work from, but they didn't really know what a scorpion was. Writers could kind of work around it (there's a lot of "oh, it's a venomous creature, moving on"), but sometimes they felt the need to break it down better. For this, of course, they'd have to refer to a bestiary -- but due to Bestiary Telephone and the persistent need of bestiary authors to turn animals into allegories, one of the only visual details you got on scorpions was that they... had a beautiful face, which they used to distract people in order to sting them.

And look. I'm not here to yuck anyone's yum, but I would say that a scorpion's face has significant aesthetic appeal only for a fairly small segment of the population. I'm sure you could get an entomologist to rhapsodize about it a bit, but your average person on the street will not be entranced by the face of a scorpion. So this did not help the medieval Europeans in figuring out how to depict scorpions. There was also some semantic confusion -- see, in some languages (such as Old and Middle English), "worm" could be a general term for very small animals of any kind. But it also could mean "serpent".* So there were some, like our artist at the top of the post, who were pretty sure a scorpion was a snake. This was probably helped along by the fact that "venomous" was one of the only things everyone knew about them, and hey, snakes are venomous. Also, Pliny the Elder had floated the idea that there were scorpions in Africa that could fly, and at least one author (13th-century monk Bartholomaeus Anglicus) therefore suggested that they had feathers. I don't see that last one coming up much, I just share it because it's funny to me.

*English eventually resolved this by borrowing the Latin vermin for very small animals, using the specialized spelling wyrm for big impressive mythical-type serpents, and sticking with the more specific snake for normal serpents.

Some authors, like the anonymous author of the Ancrene Wisse, therefore suggested that a scorpion was a snake with a woman's face and a stinging tail. (Everyone seemed to be on the same page with regards to the fact that the sting was in the tail, which is in fact probably the most recognizable aspect of scorpions, so good job there.) However, while authors could avoid this problem, visual artists could not. And if you were illustrating a bestiary or a calendar, including a scorpion was not optional. So they had to take a shot at what this thing looked like.

And so, after this way-too-long explanation, the thing you're probably here for: inaccurate medieval drawings of scorpions. (There are of course accurate medieval drawings of scorpions, from artists who lived in the southern part of Europe and/or visited places where scorpions lived; I'm just not showing you those.) And if you find yourself wondering, "how sure are you that that's meant to be a scorpion?" -- all of these are either from bestiaries or from calendars that include zodiac illustrations.

11th-century England, MS Arundel 60. (Be honest, without the rest of this post, if I had asked you to guess what animal this was supposed to be, would you have ever guessed “scorpion”?)

12th-century Germany, "Psalter of Henry the Lion". (Looks a bit undercooked. Kind of fetal.)

12th-century France, Peter Lombard's Sententiae. (Very colorful, itsy bitsy claws, what is happening with that tail?)

12th-century England, "The Shaftesbury Psalter". (So a scorpion is some sort of wyvern with a face like a duck, correct?)

13th-century France, Thomas de Cantimpré's Liber de natura rerum. (I’d give them credit for the silhouette not being that far off, but there’s a certain bestiary style where all the animals kind of look like that. Also note how few of these have claws.)

13th-century England, "The Bodley Bestiary". (Mischievous flying squirrel impales local man’s hand, local man fails to notice.)

13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (A scorpion is definitely either a mouse or a fish. Either way it has six legs.)

13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Wait, no, it’s a baby theropod, and it has two legs. (Yes, this is the same manuscript, that’s not an error, this artist did four scorpions and no two are the same.))

13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Actually it’s a lizard with tiny ears and it has four legs.)

13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Now that we’re at the big fancy illustration, I think I’ve got it — it’s like that last one, but two legs, longer ears, and a less goofy face. Also I’ve decided it’s not pink anymore, I think that was the main problem.)

13th-century England, MS Kk.4.25. (A scorpion is a flat crocodile with a bear’s head.)

13th-century England, "The Huth Psalter". (Wyvern but baby! Does not seem to be enjoying biting its own tail.)

13th-century England, MS Royal 1 D X. (This triangular-headed gentlecreature gets the award for “closest guess at correct limb configuration”. If two of those were claws, I might actually believe this artist had seen a scorpion before, or at least a picture of one.)

13th-century England, "The Westminster Psalter". (A scorpion is the offspring of a wyvern and a fawn.)

13th-century England, "The Rutland Psalter". (Too many legs! Pull back! Pull back!)

13th or 14th-century France, Bestiaire d'amour rimé. (This is very similar to the fawn-wyvern, but putting it in an actual Scene makes it even more obvious that you’re just guessing.)

14th-century Netherlands, Jacob van Maerlant's Der Naturen Bloeme. (More top-down six-legged guys that look too furry to be arthropods.)

14th-century Germany, MS Additional 22413. (That is clearly a turtle.)

14th-century France, Matfres Eymengau de Beziers's Breviari d'amor. (Who came up with that head shape and what was their deal?)

15th-century England, "Bestiary of Ann Walsh". (Screw it, a scorpion is a big lizard that glares at you for trying to make me draw things I don’t know about.)

I've spent way too much time on this now. End of post, thank you to anyone who got all the way down here.

#medieval #medieval creatures #medieval art #scorpions #medieval scorpions #manuscript #medieval manuscripts #illuminated manuscript

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astonmartinii · 4 months

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if you need me, let me know, gonna be around [mamma mia part seven] | formula one social media au

drivers: sebastian vettel, fernando alonso & fernando alonso

flo has finally given y/n the experience of motherhood, but she’ll never forget about her overgrown kids

MAMMA MIA MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, sebastianvettel and 1,934,033 others

tagged: jensonbutton

yourusername: venturing out from christmas hibernation and adding to the already overflowing collection of teddies. oh, and getting pics like that of jens while he's out "having a job"

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user1: i am a simple woman, i see dilf jenson, i lose all sense of reality

user2: gnawing at the bars of my enclosure

jensonbutton: oh wow who is that handsome specimen on the last slide?

sebastianvettel: the man who carelessly abandoned his family !!!

fernandoalo_oficial: a man who couldn't handle that i was the best driver in the family

jensonbutton: what ???

sebastianvettel: i'm sorry... is that the ghost of the man we once knew

jensonbutton: i'm not dead

fernandoalo_oficial: to me you are

yourusername: okay guys ... the bit is up !! we do miss you jense but we're happy you're happy :)

sebastianvettel: sure.... well at least you won't try and worm your way into the crochet club

fernandoalo_oficial: as long as you still come to some of my races :)

user3: glad to see parenthood has not changed these fools

charles_leclerc: why do my selfies never make the instagram :(

yourusername: charlie, if i posted every time you sent me a picture of you crying that's all my instagram would be

charles_leclerc: but ........ i thought i was your favourite

yourusername: you know i don't have a favourite

charles_leclerc: sure if that's what you want to tell yourself

maxverstappen1: we all know you say that to not hurt charlie's feelings because i'm your favourite

fernandoalo_oficial: you people are so dramatic

maxverstappen1: says you old man, i can scroll up you know

sebastianvettel: well you're all second to flo

charles_leclerc: she's disqualified from this competition, she's your actual child you have to say she's your favourite

jensonbutton: it's more who annoys us the least

user4: 2024 and nothing has changed here

sebastianvettel

liked by yourusername, fernandoalo_oficial and 1,045,388 others

sebastianvettel: love being miles away, missing my baby and getting a running commentary of how my "grid kids" are terrorising y/n

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user7: seb is on a mission to pick up every dad hobby ever. first beekeeping and now sailing

user8: don't forget the gardening and the crochet

user9: he's collecting the infinity stones of dilfism

yourusername: a full eight hours of sleep looks so good on you

sebastianvettel: so i don't look good all the time 🤨

yourusername: of course you do handsome. me and flo miss you :((

sebastianvettel: don't say that i miss you all so much

fernandoalo_oficial: maybe that's your sign to come home?

jensonbutton: yeah i think you should listen to the universe seb, you like all that crystal and salt of the earth stuff

yourusername: sebbbbbbbbb :(((((

sebastianvettel: STOP

user10: they are so precious to me

yourusername: no but seriously if i have to teach another grid kid how to iron i might lose my mind

charles_leclerc: ummmmm stop blasting me on main?

yourusername: learn to iron then

sebastianvettel: you still don't know how to iron? i thought i taught you in 2019?

charles_leclerc: clearly not well enough !! and y/n please name and shame the others so i'm not alone

yourusername: @landonorris @logansargeant sorry

landonorris: WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU Y/N? I CALLED YOU IN CONFIDENCE

logansargeant: i don't have any excuse, thank you for the lesson y/n :)

jensonbutton: at least one of our kids is well mannered

charles_leclerc: i am well mannered, sorry i love my grid mum and her kid. i do semi-know how to iron but needed an excuse to see flo :(

user11: free my girl from these incompetent men

mickschumacher

liked by sebastianvettel, fernandoao_oficial and 921,743 others

tagged: yourusername

mickschumacher: thanks nurse y/n and nurse flo for helping me - sorry about your mug

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user12: the plaster :((((((((

jensonbutton: IT WAS YOU WHO BROKE MY I <3 NASCAR DILFS MUG

mickschumacher: sorry !

jensonbutton: nuh uh mister @sebastianvettel sort your kid out

sebastianvettel: mick said he was sorry jenson, leave him be

jensonbutton: but when lando put the rubbish in the wrong recycling he had to go litter picking with you I WANT A NEW MUG

yourusername: you guys know they aren't actually your kids, you can't put them in time out

yourusername: you can barely put your own child in time out

fernandoalo_oficial: she's too cute i don't want to make her cry

landonorris: but it's fine to make me cry?

fernandoalo_oficial: yes. in fact, it's quite fun

landonorris: Y/N!!!!

yourusername: okay, babies let's all put the phones down for this evening.

user13: nooooo y/n please i could watch these idiots argue all day

yourusername: the main thing is that your finger is all okay and that you got a cute plaster out of it

mickschumacher: i very much love my lil cat finger

yourusername: so does flo, i think you might be stuck doing puppet shows for the forseeable future

mickschumacher: anything for miss flo

user14: mamma mia family dynamics you are everything to me

fernandoalo_oficial: why did mick get a kitty plaster and i got told to do it myself :(

yourusername: because you're a grown man and you injured yourself by tripping with darts in your hands

fernandoalo_oficial: mick is a grown man - HE CAN VOTE just because he needs seb's help with the paperwork does not change that

mickschumacher: you said yourself they are confusing !!

sebastianvettel: ignore him mick

fernandoalo_oficial: booooooooo

user15: i know these men provide the best entertainment for flo even if she doesn't understand a word they're saying

yourusername: she finds them very entertaining which then starts a competition to who can make her laugh the most

yourusername

liked by sebastianvettel, fernandoalo_oficial and 1,447,734

tagged: alexalbon, lilymunhe

yourusername: sometimes even my most competent grid kid needs some help, happy anniversary alex and lily x

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user16: UGH this is so cute

alexalbon: grid mum or emotional support retail assistant?

lilymunhe: so how much of the heartfelt gift was really you

alexalbon: 90% !!! i swear

yourusername: it was all alex he just needed the support (idk he said that jewellery shops are stressful)

alexalbon: they are !! i don't know how big fingers are :(

lilymunhe: thank you y/n wouldn't want the 27 year old man to get lost at the mall

yourusername: no worries, i somehow gained at least 15 extra children along with flo, i just go with it. he's less hassle than charles and max

charles_leclerc: rude.

maxverstappen1: gasp!

user17: i love how much y/n has really embraced the grid mum life

user18: i don't think she had much choice 😭

user19: the way she's like "oh i'll help you all with anything you need" and takes flo on all of these side missions and the guys just leave them to die 😭

user20: they're such dad's who don't want the cat but end up attached but don't want to show it

jensonbutton: wait which one of us claim alex? is it me? why was i not invited?

alexalbon: ur my williams dad :) and i think this trip needed a woman's touch (and flo's touch obvs)

jensonbutton: rude i give great gifts

fernandoalo_oficial: considering he's one of the least feral and has lily, i want to claim alex

sebastianvettel: i have too many kids you guys can have alex

alexalbon: sebastian! did our gardening afternoons mean nothing ?

lilymunhe: we'll take it nando

sebastianvettel: did you or did you not just make it a competition with george to see who could plant potatoes the fastest and then make a mess of my vegetable garden

georgerussell63: GUILTY

yourusername: soz but you all have to claim all of them, my rules now

user21: y/n and flo going to rule that house with an iron fist

fernandoalo_oficial

liked by yourusername, jensonbutton and 1,309,244 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

fernandoalo_oficial: glad to be back on the podium, but even more proud to call you my grid kid. we all love you, especially flo :)

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user24: THEY HAVE MATCHING MIFFY PLUSHIES

user25: miffy is dutch so that might be why max got them matching ones :)

yourusername: and flo is surgically attached to her miffy (she has named her maxi, even if she can barely say it)

maxverstappen1: you are one of my heroes and it was a pleasure to share the podium with you. there's no one else in the world i'd love to dedicate my podium to than lil mia x

fernandoalo_oficial: you've got me crying again

maxverstappen1: get it all out old man

fernandoalo_oficial: already back to the old man 🤨 i guess i'll take the nice messages while i can

user26: nando getting all mushy is so cute i can't believe this is where we are

charles_leclerc: let it be known that if i had a car fast enough i would also dedicate a win to flo, but for now she'll have to settle for a song

fernandoalo_oficial: is silvia going to kill you? because seb and y/n might kill me if they get your ass over this

charles_leclerc: but it's true, no?

fernandoalo_oficial: you will not trick me into slandering my old team charlie

maxverstappen1: LOL YOU SNOOZE YOU LOSE

charles_leclerc: YOU KNEW THAT WAS MY IDEA THIEF

sebastianvettel: charles why am i getting a call from silvia?

maxverstappen1: LOL

charles_leclerc: brb just going to lourdes

jensonbutton: lol way to get outshined by your kid

fernandoalo_oficial: at least i was in the position to be outshined by my kid

jensonbutton: ERGH you know you can't bring that up

fernandoalo_oficial: you said that you couldn't wait to get away from us

jensonbutton: oop.

yourusername: my wonderful boys!

maxverstappen1: :D

fernandoalo_oficial: i love you both :)

maxverstappen1: awww thanks nando

fernandoalo_oficial: i meant y/n and flo but sure love you too buddy

yourusername

liked by fernandoalo_oficial, jensonbutton and 1,610,449 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

yourusername: maxy, this means more than you could know, flo very much enjoyed watching 'blu' go fast :)

view all comments

user27: is this family going to make me cry? maybe.

user28: side note, how many animal onesies does flo have they're so cute

user29: she's like a lil teddy bear

maxverstappen1: glad to have officially won the title of flo's favourite brother

charles_leclerc: NOT SO FAST MISTER

maxverstappen1: maybe if you were faster you would've dedicated a win to flo :P

charles_leclerc: LOW BLOW

danielricciardo: don't even get me started on the daniel ricciardo erasure

maxverstappen1: shush daniel let the problem children talk

charles_leclerc: yeah daniel, problem children only

sebastianvettel: should we intervene?

yourusername: no, i'm intrigued as to where this is going to go

jensonbutton: i for one love watching these dummies fight

fernandoalo_oficial: let me get my popcorn

maxverstappen1: are we just entertainment to you?

jensonbutton: yes!

charles_leclerc: the minute flo can talk ASK HER WHO IS HER FAVOURITE

sebastianvettel: sure?

user30: they can never ask that question, one of them might never recover

maxverstappen1: for real though, i love you guys and i love flo. i'll send nando home with the trophy as well :)

yourusername: awwww thank you maxy :) @sebastianvettel @fernandoalo_oficial @jensonbutton new shelf needed please

jensonbutton: i'll leave this one to "the woodwork king"

sebastianvettel: am i the only one who does anything in this house?

fernandoalo_oficial: you can't be called the woodwork king and not do the work

yourusername: you don't even let them help seb

sebastianvettel: UGH.

jensonbutton

liked by sebastianvettel, fernandoalo_oficial and 912,774 others

tagged: yourusername, danielricciardo

jensonbutton: day 4,000+ of losing our actual girlfriend to our overgrown kids

view all comments

user31: PICTURE OF DANNY WITH FLO ALERT ALERT

yourusername: not my fault you guys picked up so many stray cats while in the sport

jensonbutton: i only claim lando and alex, the rest are the others' faults

yourusername: i know you love it really

jensonbutton: not when the little tornadoes hit our house, eat all of our food and steal my baby

danielricciardo: whoops

jensonbutton: and terrorise my pets DANIEL

danielricciardo: they terrorise each other jenson, maybe they aren't as well trained as you thought

yourusername: oh god...

jensonbutton: HOW DARE YOU !!!! BECKETT, SALMON AND CREAM CHEESE ARE VERY WELL TRAINED AND WELL BEHAVED

user32: old men are going crazy we love to see it

sebastianvettel: are we a bed and breakfast?

yourusername: i fear so. you need to run back from whatever ocean you are in we are low on staff now jenson is back racing. flo might be cute but she's a liability in the kitchen

fernandoalo_oficial: maybe we should just kick them out

yourusername: noooo :( not my babies

fernandoalo_oficial: can we at least charge them?

maxverstappen1: you people are the most stingy millionaires i have ever met

charles_leclerc: i pay you in piano sorry

yourusername: don't listen to them boys, flo and i love having you over

user33: so like is there any way we could open the mamma mia bed and breakfast to the public

fernandoalo_oficial: why do the grid kids see our family more than us?

yourusername: come home more often then :(

fernandoalo_oficial: i'm working on it the plane is delayed :(

jensonbutton: personally i would just run home but that's just me

sebastianvettel: i would simply just walk on water

fernandoalo_oficial: shut up. see you later

yourusername: yay !!!!

fin.

note: writer's block has really been beating my ass so there's always mamma mia to get it flowing again. i'm still working on requests, hopefully they'll come along a little faster now! also - i started an instagram for my small business i am opening it's @badlydrawnf1cats, feel free to follow x

edit: mamma mia will return

taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora @faithm120601 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @luv4kani @eugene-emt-roe @magical-spit @ironmaiden1313 @jaydaaasworld @whoreks @rainerax @nonsensical-nonsence @laneyspaulding19 @chelseyyouraverageluigi @lxclerc @gemofthenight @woweewoowa @tagteamedbitch@imagandom@mypage-myfandoms@mehrmonga@asparklysoul @unstableplant @motorsp0rt@multilovebot@lili-flower03 @its-elias-world @jolixtreesunn@nothingfuninthislife@rileynicol3@kodzuvk@mochimommy2002@fluffyspaceprincess@roseseraj@black-swan-blog27@nyrasslut@justdreamersdream@asfaraslifegets@why4anne@ineffableperson@leilanixx@lunyyx @pupbistro @gaypoetsblog@rafaaoli@champomiel@sadsierra2 @rainerax @lokietro @thecubanator2 @nzygftoji @rockyhayzkid @nmw-am @slytherheign @erikasurfer @turn-around-look-at-what-you-see @greigreyhiyyih @duck-duck-goose-18 @dark-night-sky-99 @ironcowboycopnickel @sizzlingghostoperatorbagel @2bormaybenot @42ndbrokencompass @whotfisvale @lichterfee @sticksdoesart @glitterf1 @turn-around-look-at-what-you-see @lighttsoutlewis @tagteamedbitch @glow-ish @sadg3 @kagatinkita @litoriaxu

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #mamma mia au #sebastian vettel instagram au #sebastian vettel x you #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel imagine #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso instagram au #fernando alonso x reader #fernando alonso imagine #fernando alonso #jenson button instagram au #jenson button x reader #jenson button imagine #f1 social media au

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help-itrappedmyself · 2 months

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Dead on Main Part 5

Masterpost

“We have to stop for snacks!”

“We are not stopping for snacks.”

They started this conversation two whole minutes ago.

“We have to stop for snacks! It is a quintessential part of the road trip experience. This is our first road trip. Do you really want to deprive your family of the full experience?”

Apparently, the Waynes have never been on a full road trip, usually flying places instead, so Dick is insisting we make this a whole experience. Danny is willing to bet car games will be played at some point.

“It’s a long drive, we’re not stopping unless necessary.”

Danny wonders how long the discussion can last as it reaches the four minute mark.

“ But-”

Tim taps Dick on the shoulder to shut him up. “I have to go to the bathroom.” He deadpans at Bruce.

Bruce looks at him in the rearview mirror, looks back at the road, looks back at Tim. Bruce sighs.

“Everybody is going to the bathroom. We can get some snacks, and then we are not stopping for at least four hours.”

Dick cheers, and Danny chuckles at Tim’s smirk. They’ve only been on the road for forty-five minutes, by all rights no one should have to go to the bathroom yet, but Danny was enjoying the family banter in the car.

The first forty-two minutes of the drive was mostly just everyone settling in, Dick in the front as navigator, though it didn’t seem like Bruce needed directions. Danny had asked and he’d never been to Illinois before, but they’re probably still in familiar territory, he might need a map later. Danny is in the back seat, sitting behind Bruce, Tim is sitting behind Dick. Dick and Tim both brought backpacks with them for the drive, Tim has at least two tablets in his. Danny knows they put a bunch of stuff in the trunk as well, overnight bags and other assorted items, he thinks he saw a pillow. Danny knows somebody went to pack something for him/Jason when they get there, but doesn’t know who. He doesn’t have any entertainment, because he doesn’t have anything except Jason’s phone on him.

They pull into a gas station, Bruce is determined to get the most out of this stop. Bruce pumps the gas as Danny, Dick, and Tim head inside. They do all go to the bathroom, and Bruce comes in to use the restroom as they raid the snack aisles. Tim has three canned coffees in his hands.

“You know if you drink all of those we’ll have to stop again.” Danny points out. “ Plus it’s late, can you not sleep in cars?”

“Can’t sleep at all usually. We’ll see, but I have some stuff to work on anyway.” Tim points to the drink displays. “Anything you’d like?”

Danny knows that they don’t mind paying for him, at this point it has been debated multiple times, and he knows he won’t make the whole trip without any snacks. He grabs a Monster and a Gatorade for the road. They meet Dick in the chip aisle. It looks like he’s already grabbed one of every candy, and he’s well on the way to one of every chip.

“Hey, what do you like Danny?” Danny stares at all the food precariously balanced in his arms.

“If you’re sharing, I think we’re good.”

Dick and Tim laugh.

“We will be sharing most of this. I got all of our favorites, but everyone has something that they’re not willing to share as well. Why don’t you pick out something that’s just for you.”

Tim has grabbed sour gummy worms and is making his way to the checkout counter where Bruce is waiting with a very resigned look on his face. Danny grabs a bag of beef jerky and walks with Dick to the checkout. The look on Bruce’s face when Dick walks up with his arms full is hilarious and Danny actually snorts at Bruce’s ‘I can’t control these children’ apologetic look he gives the cashier as Dick dumps his haul onto the counter.

They pile back into their seats, the seat between Tim and Danny now stuffed with all the snacks. There is not one empty cup holder left in the car. They spend the next short stretch getting resettled, opening up their first snacks and drinks. Tim Pulls out a tablet, but doesn’t start working on anything, too busy texting someone. Danny considers pulling out his phone, remembers it’s not his, and then decides not to. He wouldn’t know the password anyway, maybe he can ask if his brother’s know what it would be.

They’d just about hit the first hour mark on their 12-hour trip when Dick turns around in his chair to face the backseat. Danny sees him slip his phone away.

“Hey, Danny, why don’t you tell us about yourself?” Tim has put his phone down.

“Well, I’m still in highschool. Should graduate soon, hopefully.” Danny starts tapping his fingers on his thighs. He hopes he can graduate. “You know I have a sister in college. I have another sister, she’s a traveler, she doesn’t do school.”

“Do you like school?” Dick prompts.

“It’s okay.” He shrugs. “I’m not great at it. I like learning, but it’s not a great school and there’s only so much learning you can do from inside a locker.”

“You fit in a locker?” Tim asks.

Danny looks at himself, quickly realizing that they have no idea what he looks like as he sees Jason’s bulky frame. He chuckles, rubbing the back of his head with a hand.

“Ha, yeah. I’m more…. Tim to Damian size? I think I’m around your height.” He said in Tims direction. “Maybe an inch or two shorter, but I have no muscle mass, so It’s a bit of a squeeze but I fit well enough. Never get stuck. Tucker got stuck once.”

Dick frowns. “Do a lot of people end up in lockers at your school?”

“Sure. Me, Tucker, Mikey… Maybe Wes if he ever really pisses someone off. But he’s more likely to annoy me than Dash, and I’m not going to shove him in a locker.”

Tim nods sagely, like he understands high school. Dick is frowning like he doesn’t.

“Dash a sports guy?” Tim asks.

Danny nods. “Football quarterback and basketball.”

“Geek or nerd?”

“Personally, nerd probably.” Danny thinks about it. “But there’s not much opportunity to explore engineering and space in high school, so I’m mostly average. Tucker is a big geek, he’s great with computers. Does most of the coding for my more technological fixes when I’m working on my parent’s stuff.”

“You work with your parents a lot?” Dick’s phone chimes, but he ignores it.

“Not with them so much as on their stuff. They create it, they come up with a lot of cool stuff. I reverse-engineered a lot of it once it’s done.”

“You said a lot of it was weapons?” Tim’s phone dings. “Damian says not to ignore his text.”

“Oh!” Dick grabs for his phone.

“Some. They built other stuff as well, but they specialize in weapons and defenses against ghosts.”

Dick immediately turns back to look at him. “Ghosts?”

Danny could hear the doubt in his voice. He sighs. “Yeah, they’re ecto-biologists. Amity has a big ghost problem, that’s why we live there, they wanted to study them.” Danny has a slight shiver, but suppresses it. “They develop a lot of technology using ectoplasm-” Danny shudders for real this time. His squeezes his eyes closed, feeling a deep roiling in his gut that is vaguely nauseating, and a fire in his brain that is making his blood feel like it's burning. This is strange. His brain goes on overdrive, thinking about his parents, the blob ghosts he has had to free from their basement, the threats they make, them shooting at him. Danny recognises the churning in his body as ectoplasm riling up a core. His core.

But he’s not in his body, he shouldn’t have… Jason has died too. Danny opens his eyes and they’re glowing.

#dcxdp #dpxdc #dead on main #soulmate au #fanfiction #my writing #road trip! shenanigans #bruce is suffering #the interrogation begins

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cybertronic69 · 8 months

Text

- a little touch?

warnings: loser!ellie , bff!ellie , top!ellie , bottom!reader , fingering (r!receiving) , choking (r!receiving) , degradation (r!receiving)

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"and THAT'S what i told her." you finish your hot piece of gossip. "wow... the world is spinning." you mumble as you rest on your head on ellie's shoulder. she blushes a little and gently strokes your hair with her fingers.

"it's, okay..." she smiles softly. "i got you. take it easy." she takes a sip of her whiskey and tries to not make a face at it. she doesn't like whiskey. in fact, she hates whiskey. but when you invited her to a nice little pub in jackson, she thought that maybe that was her chance to make herself look cool to you. so here she is. drinking rat poison. "i think you've had enough for the night, no?"

"no..." you shake your head. "i can take it..." your voice is slightly breathy and oh. you really shouldn't say these things around her. not that she is going to do anything about it, cause she's a pussy, but it gives her a hard time. like, come on, have some empathy.

ellie tries to ignore the rumble in her heart when you look up at her with big curious eyes. "is it good?" you mumble when your hands slowly wrap around her cup.

she shrugs trying to act nonchalant. "i like it." she doesn't. her eyes are glued on your lips when you take a sip of her drink. indirect kiss. she wants to slap herself in the face. stop being weird. act cool.

"argh..." you stick your tongue out with a frown and she chuckles. "this shit is ass." you add.

ellie grabs her cup again and takes one more sip. indirect kiss. indirect kiss. indirect kiss. she sighs and shifts on her seat. she's pathetic.

you take a look around and notice that the cozy pub is almost empty now. the little screws in your brain start to work hard. you need to have her before someone else snatches her from you. ellie, being the dumb fuck she is, never notices when girls try to flirt with her. and that includes you too. like, ok... you might not be the most direct person ever but jesus christ the girl is oblivious.

so you shoot your shot. again. "looking pretty cute tonight, els..." you whisper with a little grin.

she looks at you like a deer in headlights. "o-oh... do you think so?" she swallows hard and chuckles awkwardly. "are you that drunk already?" neeever gonna get it.

"you look pretty even when i'm sober." you reply and ellie looks a tomato now. ok, maybe we need a different approach.

"hey... remember when you told me about the holes in the space... with the... snakes...?" you whisper. she always did stuff like that. you actually like it when she elliexplains things to you. it's cute. she's cute.

ellie's heart flutters in her chest just from hearing your voice. "snakes?" she frowns. "oh!" her expressions changes to a amused one and she chuckles. "you're thinking of wormholes... the holes in like... the space-time itself."

"really?" now you're the one frowning. you could swear it was the fucking snakes. maybe if you spent more time actually listening to her than just staring stupidly at her pretty little face.... "well... worms... snakes... they both don't have legs... or arms... so..." you shrug.

"i think wormholes are much cooler than snakes, personally." she gently smiles, finding you funny.

"snakes are definitely cooler." you blurt out and she laughs. "like... at least they're solid. everything in the universe is like dust, gas and blah, blah, blah..."

"not everything is gas or dust..." her eyes are sparkling when she looks at you. "what about black holes?"

"are they solid?" you raise an eyebrow.

"no... but... you can definitely see and hear things that have been affected by one." she stares up at the ceiling, like she's lost in thought. "plus they're infinitely dense, so that's pretty solid right?"

"no, it's not." you hug her arm and rub your face on her shoulder, making ellie's breath hitch for a moment and messing up her train of thought. "you are solid."

"y-yeah..." her voice cracks. "i am."

"i don't think i could hug a black hole, but i can hug you." you grin like you just made the smartest point ever.

ellie nods and stays silent. she's nervous. you make her nervous. even tho you two have been friends for a looong time, she always makes a fool of herself when you're around. trembling hands, stuttered words, flushed cheeks.

"you smell so good..." you brush your nose against her neck and ellie is really about to pass out. she clears her throat and adjusts her glasses that are slipping off her nose.

"you drank a lot, don't you wanna go to the bathroom?" she says trying to change to a topic that doesn't involve your lips being so close to her skin.

"mmh... yeah, i think..." you slowly get up from your seat and your little brain screws get to work again. your direct you gaze at her and smile. "come with me. girl code." girl code my ass.

ellie, not thinking much of it, just nods and follows you. she really is a dumb fuck... but you hope that by the end of the night you will be the one who's dumb.

you two get to the bathroom and you stop in front of the mirror to check yourself out. ellie also stops to check you out. she's very subtle about it tho. at least that's what she thinks.

"you're not going?" you point at one of the cabins and ellie shakes her head. "ok, just wait for me then."

as you sit on the closed toilet lid, your brain is working at the speed of light trying to figure it out what to do. this is the perfect opportunity. "els?" you whisper in a quiet voice.

"yes? are you okay?" her voice sounds gentle and caring. god, you need to have her.

"i think i need your help, can you come inside?" you unlock the door of the cabin.

"um... yeah... sure..." her filthiest dreams usually started like this. she's scared. and horny. "what is it?" she mumbles, now standing inside the cabin.

you get up and frown looking down at your clothes. "there's something making me itchy... i think it's like a tag or something... can you take it off for me?" get this woman an oscar.

ellie feels her voice dying out in her throat, so she simply nods.

"thanks, els." you lock the door and hear her gulp. "just in case someone tries to walk in..." you add with a grin plastered on you face.

"makes sense..." ellie mumbles and her eyes double in size when you start to take your shirt off. she is having a hard time looking you in the eyes. i mean, she always does, but this time there's a reason right in front of her. two reasons, if you want to be specific.

"cute bra, right?" you whisper with an amused look on your eyes.

she sighs with a flushed expression. "yes..." when you touch her shoulders and gently make her sit down on the toilet, she has to hold in a gasp. "w-what?"

you smile again. "just so you can see better. you know... the tag that we're trying to find in my clothes." your turn around and slightly fold the fabric on the waistline of your pants. "do you see anything?"

yes, she does. she sees your fucking white lace panties and this is so not fair to her. she looks up at you with that cute expression that she makes when she's too embarrassed. slightly furrowed brows, puppy eyes and flushed cheeks. she looks miserable and it's turning you on a little too much.

"what?" you try to look serious but the way your lips are curling up in a smile gives you away.

"why are you doing this to me?" ellie mumbles and her voice is so broken, so needy...

"because..." you get closer to her, making her nose brush against your ribs. "you make me so horny..."

ellie looks like someone who was hit by a car. her heart is beating so fast that she thinks she's going on cardiac arrest. "you're drunk..." she babbles breathlessly.

"doesn't chance the fact my panties are soaked right now..." you sit on her lap and she whines.

ellie was going to die. her boxers felt too tight, her lungs didn't seem to be doing their job correctly and her blood pressure was on the ground. "this is... this is not...."

"don't you want me too, els?" you bury your face on her neck and your hot breath against her skin is making her hyperventilate.

ellie closes hers for a moment and takes a deep breath... she tries to keep her cool and whispers. "we can't do that, you know it. you're drunk." her veiny hands hesitantly touch your bare back. "just relax... try to ignore... t-this feeling..."

"but it's such a good feeling..." your hips slowly start to move on their own, trying to get some relief.

ellie starts to panic a bit now "shhhhhhhh... just... ignore it..." she whispers again. her hands reach your hips, holding you tightly now, not letting you move around.

you let out a soft whimper at this. her hands feel so good against your skin... you need more.

"just...." ellie sighs. she brings you closer again and looks into your eyes... she feels your hips moving faster. she grabs you harder and tries to hold you down. "calm d... down..." she mumbles. "be good... for now..."

"touch me more... please..." you mumble against her neck.

ellie is trying to hold her breath now. her cheeks are a deep red, her jaw clenched and a few drops of sweat are now visible on her forehead. she can feel your hips moving against hers. "stop... don't make me do it..."

"do it..." your voice is shaky and full of need.

"i shouldn't... i c-can't..." she tries to calm down but it's not working. in a moment of impulse she starts kissing the side of your neck.

"nngh... love you, els...." you babble already feeling drunk in her.

"i... i love you too... i love you so much... that's why i... can't..." ellie's sentence is cut off by her leaning forward and nibbling your neck. she grips your hips tightly, not letting you move around.

"give me a k-kiss... a real one... " you touch your forehead on hers.

ellie's eyes go wide and her breathing becomes even more shallow as she hears you say that. "we're drunk... you're... not thinking clear..." she whispers, trying to find excuses so you change your mind.

"need you..." you whisper back.

her grip is tight around you. "i... i don't think this is a good idea."

you gently brush your lips against her jaw, almost not touching it. ellie lets this continue for a moment and tries to keep her cool. she feels your lips and your hand cupping her face. she bites her lower lip and tries to stay still. her body reacts to you and she's trying her hardest to stay calm and not lose it now.

but when you peck her lips, ellie loses her cool. she grabs your shoulders and pulls you towards her body, slamming her lips on yours. her hands are touching you everywhere as you're having the sloppiest and most desperate kiss of your life.

"can i p-please.... touch your..." she cups your pussy and you moan. you roll your hips against her hand and she moans.

"there's no need to ask... do it..." you whisper and she nods.

"i'll do.... it." she turns you around on her lap, making your back press against her chest. "whatever... i want..." she mumbles in between hot kisses on your neck, her hand cupping your pussy again.

you moan softly as your back arch against her body. "yes... like this" your head falls back on her shoulder and she wraps one hand around your neck. you gasp. what the fuck. that's what she meant by 'whatever she wants?' filthy. not like you're the best person to judge considering the fact that you were basically smashing your boobs on her poor shocked face not too long ago.

ellie was in heaven. this barely started and it already was better than any fantasy, any wet dream she could possibly have. your hips squirmed on her lap everytime she toyed with your puffy clit through the fabric of your panties and you gasped when she squeezed your neck a little harder and... and... and...

her boxers were soaked. she couldn't believe this. she must be dreaming... that's it. it's too good to be true. but then you grind your ass down on her pussy. she feels it right on her clit and she groans.

"s-stop acting like a slut...." she bites down on your shoulder. "teasing me like that... all the time..." she slides two fingers inside your pussy and you mewl. "gonna give you... what you want... you fucking whore." she babbles against your neck.

see, ellie's mouth wouldn't be nowhere as dirty if she wasn't so pussy drunk. she was a loser, after all. but she had all this accumulated frustration inside her that she needed to let it out. and maybe you are a whore, so who cares? no hard feelings.

"gonna fuck... this pussy... nngh... so good...." she quickens the pace of her fingers, hitting the gummy spot inside your pussy and you sob.

"i-it's too g-good, ellie..." you babble, your hips trembling hard.

"y-yeah? you like it when... when..." she's full on dry humping you now, her hips hitting your ass cheeks making a delicious pressure on her clit. "ah fuck..."

when your walls squeeze hard around her fingers, she also has to close her eyes hard. because what the fuck? is she really about to cum? no... you need to cum first.

her thumb finds your clit and massages it as her fingers keep railing your poor pussy. her free hand grips on your squirming hips, to keep you in place.

"e-ellie.... nngh..." you can't even see anything at this point. your vision is blurry with tears and your lip is in between your teeth.

"shh... you're gonna cum for me, ok? please cum for me..." she whispers against your neck, sounding a little too desperate herself.

you nod eagerly, almost drooling at this point, and your orgasm hits you hard. when you let out a loud strangled moan, ellie's hand shuts your mouth and she buries her face on your back, trying not to make any loud sounds herself.

when she takes her hand off your soaked panties, she has to hold a noise in. you made a fucking mess all over her fingers and she needs to taste it.

"can you... can you give me another one?" she kisses your shoulder. "please, give me another one... need to taste your pretty pussy... come on..."

you simply nod at this, your ability to speak long gone. ellie lifts you up and presses your back against the wall of the cabin. "gonna make it good, i promise..." she whispers as she kisses down your torso and gets on her knees.

you look down at her and the view almost kills you. a very messy ellie, with flushed cheeks, trembling lips, and her glasses still on her pretty face. yours hands caress her hair and she blinks hard.

"you're pretty..." you mumble.

ellie looks very embarrassed at the compliment almost as if she wasn't calling you names 5 minutes ago. "thank you..." she puts one of yours legs on her shoulder. "you're... the prettiest." she kisses your pussy and you shiver.

she takes her time now, being gentle and giving your thighs soft kisses and bites, teasing you until she finally gives your slit a long lick. you groan at this and tighten your grip on her hair. she also groans at this.

as things get more foggy and intense, your noises get louder. "shh... gotta be quiet." ellie mumbles, even tho she's also moaning. from eating you out. insane.

"els... if you k-keep going..." you shut your eyes hard as your legs tremble.

"...you're gonna cum? if i keep going...? her voice is shaky as she seems even more hungry now. she's eating your pussy like she's starved, your juices all over her face.

you roll your hips into her face, pulling her closer by her hair. you're pretty much using her at this point and she couldn't be happier. best day ever. or maybe not, cause soon after that you two hear loud slams on the bathroom door.

"ah, fuck, fuck, fuck..." ellie eyes are wide as she slowly gets up, her legs wobbly. she wipes her face with her shirt and licks her lips.

"the pub is CLOSING. this is not a motel." the loud voice from the other room announces and you can't help but giggle.

"dont laugh!" ellie says, exasperated. "they all will know what we've done when we leave... what if-"

you pull her into a gentle kiss and she melts. when you pull back her face is even more red than before, somehow. "h-hey... i was talking..." ellie mumbles, a slight pout on her lips.

"talk to me when we get to your room... i'm not done with you yet." you put your shirt on and leave the bathroom.

ellie stays there for a little, trying to catch her breath, hoping the redness on her cheeks would stop. it didn't.

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#talking to my psychiatrist about my obsession with ellie wearing glasses 💯#she's a cutie #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x y/n #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams x you #tlou 2 ellie #tlou 2 #tlou #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x female reader

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operator-report · 3 months

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In middle school, I read a short story for English class called Flowers for Algernon. Maybe you’ve read it, too. In the story, a disabled man named Charlie is given a medicine that cures his disability. Over the course of the story, he comes to realize that his “cure” is temporary and that he will “regress” into being disabled again. The story makes it clear that this is a tragedy. As a disabled teenager when I first read it, the story affected me deeply.

I’d like to talk about David and Noelle.

Content warnings for discussion of suicide, self-harm, ableism and eating disorders below the cut. Spoilers for Worm through arc 27.

When I was first reading arc 18, one of the things that stuck out to me is how much time the story spends on Eidolon. For me, it was the first time I paid much attention to him - prior to that, Eidolon was just an extremely powerful background character to me. But in arc 18, we learn that (1) Eidolon is losing his powers and (2) he believes that fighting Echidna will allow him to tap into some sort of reservoir to bring them back.

We find this out, of course, through Tattletale exposing him, which is always an extremely embarrassing event for Tattletale’s target. It makes it extremely clear that what Eidolon is doing is pathetic. He is going to kill a teenage girl so he can feel something.

Which would be messed up enough, right? We don’t need to make this even worse, right? Wrong. Because Wildblow has spent the last several thousand words building up the Case 53s as X-Men style metaphors for oppressed groups, and one of the forms of oppression that Wildblow generally writes well is ableism. I think you can consider most, if not all of the Case 53s as disabled in some way. I think the link is extremely clear with Noelle.

Noelle doesn’t get her powers from traditional Cauldron human experimentation - at least, not directly. Instead, she and Krouse are facing what is, to them, a no-win scenario. They’re quarantined with limited access to medical care. Breaching this quarantine would permanently render them criminals. If Noelle survives her surgery, which is a pretty big if, she’ll become disabled, in a way that both Krouse and Noelle agree is ugly and undesirable. She won’t be able to do “boyfriend-girlfriend stuff” because she won’t be “any good to look at, after.”

Krouse and Noelle are terrified of death, yes, but they’re also terrified of disability. They are desperate for control over Noelle’s body, control that, as of that moment, only the state has. (Remember the quarantine?) Krouse pressures Noelle into drinking the vial. Noelle is cured.

Noelle’s cure does not last. In attempting to assert control, her body becomes uncontrollable. Her body is her trauma and her eating disorder made literal. She still needs care.

Worm would be bad if this is why her life sucks. But Worm does something better, instead. Noelle goes through hell, not just due to the sheer difficulty of having her power, but because of the way her teammates and Coil treat her. They talk about Noelle like she’s already dead. They’re ashamed of bringing her the food she needs. When Krouse “includes” Noelle in a discussion in arc 12, it’s mostly perfunctory. They do not believe Noelle is human any longer. They lock her away.

Noelle doesn’t want to be put in a cage. Noelle doesn’t want to be dehumanized. In interlude 18, when we get insight into Noelle’s thoughts, we learn that what Noelle is angry about is the fact that Krouse locked her in a concrete bunker and placated her. When she tells people not to look at her, there’s a coda to that sentence that she doesn’t get to verbalize: don’t look at me like that.

This is the person who Eidolon is going to kill.

Via the Simurgh, this is a person Eidolon has unknowingly created.

A few thousand words of Worm go by. It’s Gold Morning. Eidolon is fighting Scion. Now, at the end of the book, we finally get substantial insight into David, the man behind the mask.

David takes a Cauldron vial to cure his disability. David sees this as the only way out, after an unsuccessful application to join the military, and then, an unsuccessful suicide attempt. David is bearing an immense amount of shame and internalized ableism. David is worried that father’s friends are watching him. (Don’t look at me.) David cleaves the world into two kinds of people: those who can have jobs, who are liked and respected because they are useful; and people like him, who are useless.

It’s a terrible way to think. Without that worldview, how could a person not take the vial? David wants to be used, because David wants to be useful. He never gets the independence he craves – not when he’s in that level of debt to Cauldron – but he gets to be useful, and that’s one of the best things you can be.

Like Noelle’s, like Charlie’s in Flowers, David’s cure doesn’t work. His abilities are wearing off. He is essentially told, when Doctor Mother administers his booster shots, that his medicine is too expensive.

Cauldron creates Noelle. David, as Cauldron’s soldier, has a role to play in her creation. David knows exactly what he is doing to Noelle. It happened to him. Worm fandom talks a lot about David being a father. He’s a father in more ways than one. (David’s father is always watching him.) (Don’t look at me.)

Cauldron never cures David’s ableism. In his world, you can be useful, or you can die. David asks Noelle if she wants to win. Noelle tells him no. You can have a job, or you can kill yourself. When David tries to kill Noelle to help himself, isn’t that a mercy?

Of course it isn’t. It goes without saying that all of this is extremely fucked up. When it comes to disability, “cure” is a complicated concept. I’m not going to get into all the ways it can be treated; this post is already a thousand words long. But I do think that Worm, through Noelle and David and the concept of the Cauldron vial, provides an extremely vivid picture of the problems with cure.

Under ableist logic, when you have a disability, a cure is something you’re expected to want. Without it, the story goes, you can’t be useful. You can’t do boyfriend-girlfriend stuff. The expectation is social, like the act of staring. Your desire for it should drive how you organize your life – it is control, like a quarantine. David is crushed by that expectation. He throws his lot in with Cauldron, the cure-makers. The expectation is passed along to Noelle, and even though David can recognize that inheritance, he cannot imagine any other way to respond to it other than attempted murder.

At the beginning of this post, I mentioned that Flowers for Algernon is a tragedy. The reason that story has stuck with me so long is that I keep going back and forth as to why. Is it a tragedy because Charlie goes back to being disabled? There’s a good chance that’s what the author intended. I don’t know. It would be a pretty shitty story if that were the case. Is it a tragedy because people only treat Charlie well when he’s “cured,” and when that stops, he’ll go back to abuse? Seems plausible. I don’t think there’s one right answer. Regardless, when you’re disabled, there’s an immense pressure to seek out a cure, and a cognizable loss when it is withheld. The fact that Worm captures that social pressure and social loss so well is extremely compelling for me, and I’m going to be thinking about these characters for a long time.

#worm #parahumans #wormblr #eidolon #noelle meinhardt #any errors or omissions in this post are due to me reading interlude 27 like 3 hours ago #shoutout to tumblr user artbyblastweave for writing excellent eidolon meta that inspired this one #i would also give a shoutout to my friend who convinced me to read worm but i already shout at her enough. enjoy. thanks for the worms

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lullabesstie · 2 months

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Found this comment on Reddit. Couldn’t explain it better than this.

“It’s clear from Mist and Fury that the original ships were: Feysand, Nessian, Elucien, and Mor/Azriel. Like it’s so obvious the way she wrote Mor and Azriel; Mor even seems vaguely interested/torn about Az. Looking at interviews, SJM even talks about Elucien as a couple (eg where would they like to travel together, etc).

Flash forward to ACOWAR. For whatever reason (lack of chemistry with Az, wanting more diversity) SJM has Mor say that she prefers women. This time the Az-pining-for-Mor is more desperate/feels like a zero chance of being requited. SJM also introduces Az as a potential love interest for Elain because she loves throwing a wrench. Just because Elucien are mates doesn’t mean they’ll have it easy; SJM’s whole thing is angst. She had to throw in a love triangle to make it uncertain. This is the first couple where mate status is confirmed upon meeting.

But there’s a problem now. If Az and Mor are no longer endgame, who will they end up with? is it not suspicious that the two new characters introduced in SF (Gwyn and Emerie) just HAPPEN to be potentially be good partners for Az and Mor? Like it’s not a coincidence that Emerie looks at Mor and blushes, remarking how pretty she is. It’s not a coincidence that Az and Gwyn have so many interactions in the text. It’s not a coincidence that a “random side character” shows up in a bonus chapter.

When SJM created Gwyn and Emerie, it wasn’t just to give Nesta friends. These characters clearly didn’t exist when she wrote MAF. SJM wanted new characters that would solve her retcon of ending Az/Mor. She wanted to solve the Mor/Az retcon so bad that she created a NEW RETCON of Az going to Sangravah. Like why bother to add that detail if it’s not important.

Also: poor Lucien. His endgame heroine was supposed to be Nesta until SJM realized they would be terrible together and that Nessian had better chemistry. So she gives Elucien the mating bond. Like is she really going to fuck Lucien over TWICE? She loves him as a character and has put him through the wringer. Yes, I agree that SJM can change her mind and maybe is open to mate rejection, but Lucien has already switched love interests from Nesta to Elain! Who else is he going to switch to, considering that Jurian and Vassa are “at each other’s throats?”

Finally, please think about the number of books left. Ignoring novellas (which are probably gonna be fluffy ones like ACOFAS where nothing happens), there are two main books left. Two couples.

Option A:

• ⁠Gwynriel (Valkyrie growth, Illyrian rebellion, exploring Ramiel, Gwyn’s autumn heritage and maybe lightsinger?? powers)

• ⁠Elucien (Helion secret baby, defeating Koschei, freeing Vassa, fixing spring court)

Option B

• ⁠Elriel (mate rejection storyline, potentially some stuff above)

• ⁠?????

Literally WHO is the second book in this equation? Lucien and Vassa?? We barely know Vassa and there’s barely any connection to Night Court. And Lucien’s book is going to be depressing as fuck dealing with mate rejection; does anyone want to read two heavy books of rejection? Jurian and Vassa: again, we barely know them! At least with Tower of Dawn, Chaol had been a main character for a long time with POV. SJM will not do a full-length Emerie/Mor book as much as I would love for one. She’s very cognizant of criticism re: Mor bi rep in the past; she doesn’t want to open a can of worms and be accused of writing bad sapphic rep. If anything, I can see a fluffy Emerie/Mor novella with little angst (or them getting together in the background of other books).

So from a meta structural level, I don’t understand who the second couple will be if Elriel is endgame. Lucien/Vassa is the most plausible answer, but 1) we barely know Vassa, 2) she’s human and Lucien is immortal. So are we going to toss her into the Cauldron to make her immortal? Serious question, and 3) I don’t want TWO books about mate rejection, it’s depressing as hell. I can see one but not two.

But with Gwynriel and Elucien, you have enormous fan and audience interest in ALL FOUR CHARACTERS. They’re directly tied to Night Court and SJM so far has no intention of staying away from the core group.”

#acotar #elucien #gwynriel #sarah j maas #lucien vanserra #azriel #elain archeron #gwyneth berdara

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captain-mj · 1 month

Note

Bro you cannot just drop prep/jock soap and goth ghost and dip. We need you to give us your brain worms so we can analyze it like a science project

When you have time of course

I will put my worms in a petri dish for you

Soap was an artist! He liked sketching and painting and the act of making art. But he didn't like art essays. The explaining over and over again each detail. Breaking down everything until it felt like a bunch of paint strokes instead of art.

But part of an art degree is a ton of art essays. So Soap went to the museum to write what he needed. He preferred museums to finding art online. A big part of art for him was texture. His preference would've been to touch the art, to feel the paint underneath his fingers. But the assignment specified art from the Baroque period and therefore they had to be older and no museum was going to allow his grubby hands to touch the art.

Soap glanced down one of halls to see if there was anything interesting there when he faltered.

Oh lord.

The man was big. His shoulders. His height. The thighs he had that looked like tree trunks. It was all covered in tight black fabric and silver chains. A work of bloody art himself.

Soap had to hold himself back from wolf whistling.

Once he was done objectifying admiring the man's body, he looked higher up. There was a mask covering the bottom of his face, the only thing visible being his eyes which had heavy eyeliner on them. He could still see the locs of bleached blond hair that surrounded him like a halo.

Soap wanted to paint him.

"You gonna stare all day?" Someone snarked at him and he jumped, glancing at a slightly smaller blond man. He looked at him like he was gross and for a brief moment, he worried he might be about to be hate crimed. The man looked a lot the other one actually now that he was looking closer. Dressed the same way too.

"Aye, what's your fucking problem with it?"

The man's face scrunched. "Ew." He walked away, leaving Soap rather confused but now a bit determined to talk to mystery man.

Pretending to be looking through the paintings, he got closer to him.

Dark brown eyes quickly glanced over at him before glancing back at the paintings.

"Hey. My name is Soap."

"Ghost."

Ooh, he's from Manchester and sticks with his aesthetic. Nice. He'd prefer a not British person, but as far as British people go, he could do worse than Manchester. He glanced at the painting Simon had been admiring.

The Raising of Lazarus by Rembrandt.

"It's a lovely painting." Soap put on his normal charm, acting suave and polite.

"Aye." Ghost gruffed and went quiet again, staring in simple contemplation. His arms were crossed, making already large arms flex.

Soap started to take notes for his assignment. Although he was definitely hoping to score well in more than one ways, he did need to take notes for his assignment.

Ghost glanced over at what he was writing quizzically and Soap answered the unasked question. "I'm doing a project."

"Fun." He huffed and looked back at the painting.

Soap looked down at his chest and licked his hips. "Yeah, it's a good one." He kept writing stuff. "You a college student?"

"Yeah."

"What do you study?"

"Forensics. I'm assuming you're art?"

"Chemistry with a minor in art!" Right as Soap went to mention how funny it was that they didn't share any classes, Ghost interrupted him.

"Wait. Johnny? Johnny MacTavish? We share several classes."

Soap brightened. "Do you dress like this all the time?" There was zero chance he did or Soap would already know his name, address and dick size.

"We have morning classes together. I don't dress up for morning classes." Ghost said decisively. He stretched and shook his head.

How did he manage to not notice the shoulders though at least? The man was huge. He was also several inches taller than Soap and therefore the majority of the class. Maybe if he sat in the back and left later than everyone?

Soap nodded. "Understandable. You look nice."

"Nice huh?" Ghost smiled at him. He could tell cause his eyes scrunched slightly.

"Yeah. Nice." Soap said softly, his chest doing something weird.

They stared at the painting a while before Ghost pulled away to start exploring the rest of the exhibit.

Soap finished up the notes he needed to write his paper and then started to walk with him. He tried to find his opening during all of this.

Ghost stopped at a very specific painting.

ARTEMESIA GENTILESCHI, JUDITH SLAYING HOLOFERNES, C. 1612–1613

The art was... stunning. The red, faded from time and wear, was still beautiful against the white of the blankets.

The women held him down and there was a movement to it that Soap wanted in his own work. His fingers trembled with the want to touch it. To feel the texture of the paint under his fingers. Ridges and bumps and smooth layers of the different strokes.

Ghost hummed. "I don't really get art. It's pretty but some people look at it and it... gives them something. An epiphany."

Soap hummed. "I find touching it helps."

Ghost looked at him, raking his eyes over him. "I see. Do you want to head out then?"

Soap frowned. "Why?"

"You're a piece of art and I'm looking for an epiphany."

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #simon ghost riley #johnny soap mactavish #call of duty modern warfare ii #cod mw2 #ghostsoap #cod #soapghost #ghoap #btw the mystery guy is Tommy #He's not homophobic #just thinks that liking his brother is gross

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thetriumphantpanda · 5 months

Text

Delicate - Chapter Two: Maroon

3.7k / pairing: joel miller x f!reader

Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

summary: despite some last minute reservations about meeting Joel, you throw yourself into the date, but it doesn't go according to plan.

A/N: Ahhhhh oh my God - @hellishjoel and I are so excited to bring you the second chapter of Delicate! We're having the best time with this little pairing already and we hope they manage to worm their way into your hearts just like they have with us! We're taking turns in posting the chapters of this - so please make sure you're following both of us to keep up to date!

warnings: mentions of being a single parents, rom-com vibes, foul language, a bestie who is nothing but trouble, Joel being terrible at dating in general, a lil smattering of angst, mentions of food & alcohol consumption.

There’s a flow of peace that settles across you when the door to Noah’s room clicks shut. You love him, he’s the best thing that ever happened to you, and he keeps you afloat every day, but these moments, when he’s finally asleep and you can stop thinking for a minute, are the moments you crave each day.

You settle down on the couch, mug of tea in hand, with the TV playing quietly, just for background noise more than anything, as you pick up your phone for the first time that evening. There’s a few emails, mainly about shopping sales and holidays that you think you should book but never do - those are quickly deleted to stop any temptation of spending money on something that isn’t essential. There are a few messages from your mom, just confirming that she’ll pick Noah up from school tomorrow, what she’s planned for them to do and what she’ll feed him. You shoot a message off in reply that it all sounds good and that he’s excited for some quality time with his grandparents, because it’s true, and then you set your phone down on the coffee table and try to ignore it for a while.

You finish your tea and queue up a few episodes of a show you’ve been meaning to catch up on - something mindless that people at work always seem to talk about. So mindless that it actually sends you to sleep. You wake with a jolt a few hours later. The house is still quiet, which means Noah hasn’t decided he’s still got too much energy and needs to burn it off by jumping on the bed or pulling some of his toys out. You sigh, checking the time to see it’s almost midnight.

You gather your stuff, put the mug in the sink to deal with in the morning before trudging up to bed. There’s a moment at the top of the stairs, where you think it would be so easy to flop down on the bed and forgo the rest of your responsibilities, but you’ve got your mother’s voice in the back of your mind, something about wrinkles and pores and how bad it is to sleep in your makeup, so you turn left into the bathroom, cover your skin in serums and creams and then finally, just after midnight, you fall into bed.

Knowing it’s bad to look at your phone this late at night, once you’ve set your alarm, you click open the godforsaken Hinge app that Dixie had insisted on setting you up on. So far, after six months, you’d been on a fair few first dates, three second dates and had a God awful one night stand, but nothing had been sticking, no-one seemed to be exactly what you were looking for. You’d promised her that you’d try though, so as had become a nightly ritual for you, you set about giving away your daily likes, not really paying a huge amount of attention until he pops up for you. Joel. 45. From his first profile picture, the exact kind of man you’d been searching for. Rugged, handsome,

Of the few photos he had on his profile, he was often donning a flannel or a simple short-sleeved shirt that curved around his biceps and broad shoulders. He always wore the same tilted smile, with dazzling eyes and dark hair with licks of silver. He was a handsome lumberjack of sorts.

He looked to be an outdoorsman, at least two of Joel’s pictures were of him hiking a trail accompanied by a young girl, surrounded by greenery and tall rocks with the sunshine peeking through the branches. His face was glowing and tan from the light, his handsomeness so natural. Beautiful, even.

Joel’s “Typical Sunday” consisted of a black coffee in the morning, followed by making burgers on the grill for him and his family before settling down to watch a Dallas Cowboys football game. That was a typical Sunday for a man, but it showed how he liked to unwind and that he was a family man.

First, the mention of a family, plus that beautiful young woman in almost all of Joel’s pictures - a daughter, perhaps? Older than your own boy by quite a few years. He must have been on the younger side of having children if any of these assumptions were even correct. But there was something about knowing he also had a baby to be thinking of felt familiar, comforting, as they would always come first.

And it turns out that talking to him is pretty easy too. He’s charming, a slight insomniac like you, and from what you can tell from the slight back and forth you managed to have before you go to sleep, able to flirt a little with you too. It’s why when he asks to take you out you say yes without hesitation, it could be fun, he could be the one, who knows?

Mornings are always chaos. Half-eaten bowls of cereal on the table, a mug of coffee made with the best of intentions but sat to go cold, a rush of getting Noah dressed and in the car with everything he needed for school and then the annoyance of getting stuck in traffic on the way to drop him off, all coalesce to make you stressed as you help Noah out of the backseat.

“Remember granny is picking you up this afternoon okay?” You ask, bending down to kiss his cheek as he fiddles with the straps of his backpack.

“I know, mom.” He groans, using the back of his hand to wipe the kiss off his cheek.

You smile, ruffle his hair a bit, because no matter how much he might protest, he will always be your baby, “Behave for her, okay?” You warn lightly with a smile, “She’ll bring you back home tomorrow.”

Noah spots some of his friends across the playground and steps around you to make his way into school. You turn, hold your hand up in a wave and shout at him to have a good day. Noah turns, walking backwards to look at you, waving right back.

“Have a good day, mom!”

Underneath the way he’s growing up, he’s still the sweet little boy you knew you could raise on your own. You sit back in your car, picking your phone up to make sure you’ve got enough time to go to the store and stock up on some groceries, when you notice a notification from Hinge. It’s Joel.

Just checking you’re still okay for tonight?

For some reason, you sit and stare at it for a few minutes, fingers itching to type something, to confirm, but there’s that usual seed of doubt that appears after all this time that makes you want to tell him something’s come up, you’ll have to reschedule. After months and months of trying to find someone, to failed first date after failed first date, you wonder if it really is worth it, no matter how good of a match Joel Miller seems on paper. Is he really going to be worth getting dressed up for? You sigh, type out your usual message of I’m sorry, I think I might have to reschedule, when the screen is filled with the face of your best friend, trying to call you.

“Hello?”

“Hello sexy mama!” Dixie’s voice immediately soothes you, “How are you this fine morning?”

“I’m okay,” You speak softly, plugging the phone into the car so you can speak to her as you drive, “Just dropped Noah off at school.”

“How is my favourite man?” She asks.

“Yeah, he’s good, he’s staying with my mom tonight so I think he’s just pleased to be away from me for a while.”

“It’s like the universe read my mind!” Dixie exclaims on the other end of the phone, “Do you want to go out and get wine drunk tonight?”

You stutter for a second, because you could, you could cancel with Joel, go out and drink cheap wine and dance with your friend, but before you can say anything, Dixie picks up on your hesitation.

“OH MY GOD!” She all but screeches, “Do you have a hot date tonight?!”

You grumble a little, because how is she always so attuned to you like this?

“Yeah, although I don’t know if I’m gonna go.”

“Why not?”

You sigh again, “I don’t know if it’s worth it anymore?” You offer.

“Girl, get outta here with that attitude!” She chastises, “Is he hot?”

You grumble a little again, but you can’t deny it, Joel is hot, “Yes.”

“Well then,” You can hear her clap her hands in the background, clearly having you on speaker so she can go about her business, “If he’s hot, then there’s no harm in it, forget me and my wine, go out, drink wine with your hot mystery stranger and get fucked, girl!”

“Dixie!” You screech, “I’m not fucking him.”

“Whatever you say, girl!” She shouts down the phone, “If you cancel, I’m kicking your ass, okay?” You sigh, once again, something you’re getting more and more used to these days, “Have fun and be safe!”

And then all you can hear is the dial tone from where she’s hung up on you. You think about it all the way around the grocery store, she wouldn’t know if you did cancel, would she? But you’ve known her long enough to know she’d sniff a lie out of you in seconds. So, when you settle down at your desk, you pull out your phone and send Joel a reply to confirm the plans you made last night, and then spend the rest of the work day trying not to work yourself up about the whole thing.

You don’t think that the anxiety of waiting for a date to show up will ever get easier. Stood just inside the doorway of the restaurant Joel had chosen, you’re chewing at the skin around your thumbnail. Did you dress right? Do you look okay? When he turns up will he look like his pictures or not? Will he lean in for a kiss on the cheek? Do you give him a hug? You’d like to think of yourself as a seasoned pro at this now, but those first few awkward moments always made you anxious - there was no second chance at first impressions.

You needn’t have worried about Joel though. When the door opens and he stands in front of you, he is exactly the man you’d studied on that app. Taller than you, broad and big. Scruff, peppered with gray across his face, though it’s neatly kept, just like this hair, although more unruly, it’s still peppered with grays and it suits him. He’s wearing dark jeans, and a flannel that you think must be saved for best. You step closer, open your arms. Joel leans down, and does indeed press a kiss to your cheek, one of his wide palms pressed lightly on your lower back as he hugs you back a little.

“Nice to meet you, Joel.” You smile when he pulls away.

“You too, ma’am.” He smiles back at you, and you can tell he’s nervous.

“What have I told you about that?” You tease as you step towards the hostess, Joel giving her his name, you hope the slight teasing will put him at ease, you remember just what it was like when you started dating for the first time, and as much as you want to have a good time, you want to make sure Joel is having a good time too.

She picks up two menus, leads the two of you to a table at the edge of the restaurant. Joel pulls your chair out for you, pushing it gently under you as you sit down. The light is low, and there’s a thrum of chatter across the whole restaurant as you open the menu, glancing your eyes over the choices.

“Do you want to share a bottle of wine?” You ask, finger skimming the list of wines available.

Joel nods, “Sure thing, darlin’.”

You smile, looking down at the menu, deciding you much prefer darling to ma’am, especially in that sweet southern drawl of his. When the waitress returns, you both order food and a bottle of wine, which is quickly brought to the table, uncorked, with the dark red liquid poured into two glasses. The waitress leaves the bottle on the table as you raise your glass, Joel following suit, clinking them together before you take a sip.

You’re watching as he does the same, a smaller sip than you, and then watch as his nose crinkles and he coughs a little. It makes you laugh, putting your glass down to cover your mouth a little.

“Dunno why I said yes,” He shakes his head, “Fuckin’ hate wine.”

You can’t help but properly laugh now, hoping that it puts him a little at ease. You reach over the table, lay your hand on his wrist just a touch, “What would you prefer to drink?”

You don’t miss the way he subtly drags his wrist back from your touch, covering it by scratching at the skin on the side of his hand, but you don’t let it bother you. You’re a touchy person, it’s what makes you feel at ease mostly, but that doesn’t mean it works for Joel, so you fold your hands back in your lap.

“Usually beer,” He mumbles, flagging down the waitress as she walks past to ask for just that, “Or whiskey.”

“I don’t mind a beer,” You offer, trying to make light conversation, “But whiskey makes my throat burn.”

He doesn’t offer much of a reply apart from a short hum from his mouth, his attention moving from you to the room around you, letting the table fall into silence. You look down at your lap, trying to think of things to say whilst you wait for your food.

“So, Sarah, right?” You ask after his daughter, it’s something the two of you have in common at least, “You must be super proud of her, medical school is incredible.”

“Yeah,” He says simply, “She’s a very smart girl.”

You expect him to ask after Noah, ask him a little about what he’s like, maybe what his favourite subjects are at school or whether he’s in any sports clubs or anything, but he doesn’t offer anything else to you, doesn’t ask any questions.

There’s a lull in the conversation, saved by the waitress dropping your meals in front of you, fresh tomato pasta with chicken for you and steak and mashed potatoes with asparagus for Joel. You swirl your fork through the pasta, scooping some into your mouth as Joel cuts into his steak. Your eyes are trained on him, watching how he eats - it’s one of your big tests, table manners, and to be fair to him, he passes with flying colours - sure he eats a bit fast, but it’s nothing off-putting, and he seems to be able to use a knife and fork properly and chew with his mouth closed, which is a far cry from the last person you’d been out with.

“You look really good tonight,” You offer, setting your fork down for a moment, “The flannel is very Texas.”

You think in the dim light you can see him flush a little, and you’ve not said anything that isn’t true, he does look good. Fucking great actually. Joel finishes swallowing, takes a swig of his beer.

“Thank you,” He tips his head towards you, “You look nice too,” He brings his hand up to his face to motion, “Rosy cheeks.”

You try not to let your disappointment show, it is a compliment after all, so you put all your focus back down into your meal, the two of you finishing your food in a rather awkward silence - you willing Joel to ask you something, to start a conversation, anything really. You watch as Joel pushes the asparagus around his plate after eating two of the spears, finishing off his steak and potatoes but leaving the rest of the greens.

When the waitress comes back to clear your plates, she asks if you’d like the dessert menu. You look to Joel, who tips his head in a way to say it’s up to you, but this has quite possibly been the most excruciating few hours of your life, so you drain your glass of wine, tip the last of the bottle into the glass and sit to wait for the bill.

“Listen,” Joel starts, dragging your attention from the bottom of your glass to him, a look of slight regret on his face, “I ain’t too good at all this,” He tries to explain, “It’s been a long time and I’m a little rusty.”

You kind of want to wring his ass for it a little, but underneath his apparent disinterest, you can still see the nerves of the guy who first walked through the door, and you get it, you think you’d been similar when you first started dating again, but you don’t think you’d completely lost the ability to think of a single question.

Joel insists on paying the bill and you don’t fight him for the privilege of splitting it - you think it might upset some of that southern chivalry he has and for someone else they’ll love that. It’s a silent affair as you both stand up, gather your things.

“How are you getting home?” Joel asks, holding the front door open for you.

“I can just grab a cab,” You smile, “How about you?”

He points to a truck, “Only had one so I can drive home,” He explains, “Do you mind if I wait with you for your cab?” He asks, “I’d feel better knowing you get in one safe.”

“Of course,” You smile, “The hostess called one for me, so it shouldn’t be long.”

There’s another lull in conversation, thankfully your cab arrives quickly, saving the silence from falling into awkwardness again. Joel beats you to the door, opening it for you.

“I would say it’s been nice meeting you,” He speaks, “But I feel like I made this real difficult, and I’m sorry for that.”

Going to step into the cab, you stop, leaning down to put your bag in the back seat, pausing a little before you turn back around to him, meeting his eyes. They’re striking, dark brown and beautiful, and trying to tell you just how much he knows he’s messed up. It makes your heart sink because you feel that sadness too, knowing he had so much promise, that he understood you in a way you thought other people didn’t, without even needing to talk to you, he’s a single parent, he gets it, like other people don’t. It frustrates you, makes your breath catch in your throat and your eyes glass over.

You bring a comforting hand to his shoulder, “It’s okay,” You add a smile at the end, “It takes some time to get used to this all again, I was the same,” You look down at your shoes, “It’ll get easier each time you do it, I promise.”

His head dips, regret flashed across his face, like he wishes he could go back and do it all over but better this time.

“M’sorry, again,” His tone is low, morose even, then he dips, presses a soft kiss to your cheek, “Get home safe.”

You flop down on your bed, hand running over your face, wondering at what point it had gone wrong. He’d had so much potential, had seemed like he could be so right for you, so what went wrong?

No sooner have you sent the ‘home safe’ message to Dixie, do you feel the soft vibrating of your phone. You answer, put the phone on loudspeaker and set it by your head.

“So, how did it go?”

You groan, “He had so much potential Dix,” You let out a pained noise, “I don’t know where it went wrong?!”

“Oh honey,” She coos down the phone, aware more than anyone how much you wanted to be done with dating and finally have someone you could spend time with, “What happened?”

“I don’t even know!” You exclaim, “Like, I could tell he was nervous, and this was his first date in years, but it was like he’d never spoken to a woman in his life, it was so hard!”

You can hear her sucking on her teeth on the other end of the phone, “Are you being too hard on him?” She asks, “You always say the cocky men are no good because they’re rehearsed, maybe he just needs time to warm up?”

“Dixie, I’d need a flamethrower to warm him up!”

That gets a giggle out of her, “Mama, listen to me,” She goes into serious mode now, “Not everyone is as seasoned as you at this, and if this was his first date in years and he comes face to face with you? Of course he’s going to be nervous, you can’t write him off just for that honey.”

That’s when your truth really hits out, “But what if I spend all that time warming him up and it’s a waste of time? He could turn out to be no good for me and then I’ve wasted so much time instead of trying to find the right person.”

“Honey, respectfully, you’re forty, not at the end of your life, I promise that maybe spending some time trying to unravel someone a little instead of writing them off immediately might actually be worth it.”

“I don’t know, Dix…” You trail off.

“Just sleep on it, okay?” She offers, “See how you feel when you wake up before you send him the ‘thanks but no thanks’ message.”

“Okay, I promise.”

The two of your say goodbye to each other, you stay led on the bed for a while before you push yourself up, plug your phone into the charger, noticing the notification from Hinge when your screen lights up. You can see it’s Joel’s name that sits on the front screen. You sigh, sitting on the edge of the bed, weighing up whether to read it or not. Deciding that if you do read it, you’re likely to make a decision against what Dixie told you, so you leave the notification sitting there, get yourself ready for bed and then will yourself to sleep without going over every second of the date wondering what you could have done differently.

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lizzaneia-elizalde · 2 months

Note

how would the yanderes react when darling asks "would you love me if i was a worm" 😁

Yandere men and their darling asking "would you love me if I was a worm"

By the way, if you don't specify which set of yanderes, i'll do the latest! So, for this, it's set 2!

YAN! DELINQUENT

"A worm? Uh..."

Liam would be flabbergasted.

He would genuinely think about it. He doesn't have pets before. But, you're not a pet. You're his lover, so does that count as beast--

Then he watches your face distort from cheeky to worried, to sad because he's not answering at all.

But please, don't take his silence the wrong way. He's genuinely trying to give a logical answer to your question!

He's thinking of what soil to use, the cage... Wait, does caging you benefit? Or would it be healthier for a worm to be on grass?

His head is going overload trying to think of what to answer that you actually felt bad for it, until he just groans in his palms and say...

"Of course, I will. Worm or not."

YAN! BULLY

"Yeah no."

Straightforward answer, and it just pissed you off that he didn't even think about it.

And oh boy does he like the fact that you're pissed at him for saying that. He'll tease you about it, saying "boohoo, i'll just throw you away and find another person. Because honestly, how can I fuck you when you're a worm?"

Now, that genuinely hurt you, because it implied that he only loves you for your body. And now, you're ignoring him. Sure, you have no other friends to turn to, but what's there to miss from him when he says those stuff.

Uno freezes, because now he sees you're actually hurt. At first, he'll laugh at you for being such a sensitive person, not until you ignoring him became too painful and he had to lower is high ass pride and kneel in front of you, saying that you as a worm wouldn't matter because he still loves you.

YAN! NSFW ASMRTIST

"Is this a request for a new audio?"

Rose was slightly aware of the trend, but he didn't expect you to say it to him. So maybe you were suggesting a new audio plot?

But no, you're actually asking if he would love you if you were a worm.

He chuckles, a bit awkward. He's a bit too old for these trends.

"I don't understand the trend. But um... Yes, I will still love you. I'll take care of you greatly, and make sure you live your best life with me."

YAN! ISEKAI'ED ADVENTURER

"My lady? A worm?"

Aeron stops what he's doing (probably marquessate work) and looks up at you. "Are you going to get cursed or something?"

If he somehow knew the trend beforehand, he'll be surprised that you knew that. Are you also from this world, perhaps?

But then, he'll stop himself and chuckles. "Yes, I will. Also, I know that you will overcome whatever curse will be afflicted on you."

It seems that he misunderstood everything. But you don't mind.

YAN! PLAYER

"Yes. And I'll also be a worm. And we'll have a worm wedding, then a worm family..."

Oh gods, please make him stop.

After you asked that question, he'll giddily answer like he's been thinking about the question a lot. You looked at him funnily as he listed down his wormy fantasy when you both become worms like it's the inevitable. Sometimes, it's scaring you, really.

"--then, i'll bring you the most precious food out there, wait, what kind of worm? Ooh, earthworms? But no..."

Why did you even ask that?

YAN! PARASITE

"Aren't we worms already?"

You shoot Acheron a mean look and he laughs. "I mean, we're technically parasites, hopping from one body to another. So yes, we are worms, and I still and will love you. Yes?"

Well, that's true... But did he really have to be logical? Where's the whimsy and fun?

As you pout there, he chuckles and kisses your forehead.

Well, at least he will love you no matter what.

YAN! EMPEROR

"... No."

You were shocked. Surely, SURELY, the man who committed war crimes just to find you would love you as a worm?

When you asked him why, he would just scoff and say:

"I am a man of high status. I will not be loving a worm."

You frowned, and he could clearly tell that you were about to turn around and walk away when he suddenly pulled you close.

"I will be finding the best wizards and sorcerers out there, even warlocks and witches, just to turn you back to your form."

Okay, maybe Callisto can be sweet too.

YAN! COLLEGE STUDENT

"No questions, yes."

Alpheus gave you a straight answer as he put hot glue on the plank on his hand before gently placing it on the board. "I'll even make you a small house just for you to live on."

He's unbelievably sweet when he said that, like it was the most obvious thing ever. Even when he's making his architectural model, he's still so attentive towards you.

In reality, he doesn't understand this trend at all. Why become a worm in the first place? It's not even logical. But eh. You wanted to ask, so fine.

YAN! DEEP SEA CREATURE

"What is a worm?"

Ah, you forgot that this man is essentially homebound and cannot get out. So, no worms. So you thought of an alternative, a starfish!

He deeply thought of the answer to give you, until... "Hmm, yes, I will. But, that means, I can dissect you into multiples so I can have more of you."

Okay, okay... Jeez.

YAN! HUNTER

"Wait, a worm? Yes, but..."

He's not sure how to say this without saying anything incriminating. "I have to remake the whole pool aquarium into a biodiverse ecosystem!" Well, at least he's still thinking of you.

"NO! WAIT! IF I GIVE YOU THAT BIG OF AN ENCLOSURE, I'LL LOSE YOUR WORM FORM!" You blinked, not expecting such a passionate revelation of an answer. He bit his nail, actually thinking deep. You just rolled your eyes and chuckled.

YAN! KING

"If you become a worm, then I'll be a worm too."

Soma frowns. What kind of question is this?

"I'll make sure that you won't get away from me and crawl back to the Emperor." He seethed, eyes burning with jealousy.

Did you ask that to spite him? Are you going to escape by being a worm? Foolish enough to even say your plan too. He grabs your hand, kissing you roughly.

"I will kill every single worm I see until I reach to you."

YAN! GOD

"Do you wish to be one?"

Liviticus stopped watching the screen and looked to you. He's thinking too deep now. "Are you unhappy in your new form? I can fix that."

But before you could deny, Livticus turned you into a worm, making you shriek in horror as he picked you up. He smiles softly, thinking you like it. "You'll turn back into a human tomorrow, so don't worry."

STILL TOMORROW?

Man... You shouldn't have asked...

YAN! PROSECUTOR

"I will not be able to love you romantically as a worm."

He sadly says as he holds your hand. He seems genuinely distraught of the fact that he can't. You asked him why not. "It's because we are species apart, and it will be unfair to you if I confine you to me always when your place is in the soil, thriving, eating, growing... I simply cannot."

He pecks you on the forehead, gently brushing the back of your hand. "But, I will still long for you, forever."

#lizzaneiaelizalde #yandere writing #tw yandere #yandere imagines #yandere male #yandere boyfriend #male yandere x reader #yandere x darling #yandere x you #yandere fic

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petite-phthora · 1 year

Text

Do you think it was a date?

[DP x DC fic]

[Love at first... murder? - part 5]

<< Prev | Next >>

Part 1

Ao3

---

In-chat nicknames:

Daniel = Danny

Sharpshooter = Jazz

TooFine= Tucker

Chaos = Sam

TheCoolerDaniel = Danielle/Dani/Ellie

---

Private chat nicknames:

Bill = Danny

Pants = Jazz

---

As soon as Danny enters his apartment, face bright red, he takes his head into his hands and lets out a silent scream.

He could have said anything, and he panicked and went with Toodealoo Kangaroo???

At this rate, he’ll never get a partner.

As Danny stands there in misery, his phone starts buzzing with messages. Curious, he checks his phone to see what going on.

Uh oh.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Chaos: Guys check this out

Chaos: *link*

Chaos: The Joker escaped from Arkham again, but no one’s heard anything of him since, nor have they been able to find him

TooFine: @Daniel 👀

TooFine: ok the @ had been a joke but the fact that he has read it and not replied is concerning

Sharpshooter: @Daniel, what did you do?

Sharpshooter: @Daniel

Sharpshooter: I can see that you’re reading this, don’t ignore me.

TooFine: ohhhh someones in troubleee 👀

Sharpshooter: Tucker.

TooFine: 🤐

---

Danny takes a deep breath.

Well, it’s now or never. Let’s hope Jazz is feeling merciful.

---

Private chat

Bill: ok so you know how you said you would still love me if I was a worm?

Pants: I have no clue how this ties into the previous conversation, but yes. Why?

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: would you also still love me if I

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: accidentally

Bill: vibe checked someone that tried to uh

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: kidnap and or kill me??

Bill: 🥺🥺🙏

Pants: Danny, did you accidentally kill the Joker?

Bill: yes or no Jazz??!? 😩🥺

Pants: Yes, Danny. I would still love you if you, hypothetically, accidentally killed the Joker.

Bill: this is why you’re my favorite sister 🥹🥰😘

Bill: don’t tell Ellie 😳🫣

Pants: Danny, what happened?

---

Danny lets out a sigh of relief before proceeding to tell Jazz what happened.

---

Pants: Oh Danny.

Bill: are you mad at me?

Pants: I’m not mad at you, I just want you to stay safe.

Pants: While I don’t condone murder, I understand that it was self-defense and an accident. I‘m just glad that you’re alright.

Bill: 🥰💞😘

---

With a small smile on his face, Danny goes back to the groupchat.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Daniel: you know

Daniel: if I had a nickel for every time I’ve had to fight off an insane clown that attacked me 🤡

Daniel: I’d have two nickels

Daniel: which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice, right? 🤔

Chaos: Damnit Danny, we leave you alone in a new city for a week and you already manage to get into a fight with one of Gotham City’s most infamous rogues

TooFine: actually its been 6 days 10 hours and 17 minutes

TooFine: so not even a full week yet

Chaos: Did you at least get a good few punches in?

Chaos: Danny?

TooFine: @Daniel ???

TooFine: if i had a nickel for every time danny said something concerning and then didnt provide context id be richer than vlad

Daniel: anyway, for completely unrelated reasons, @TooFine I need you to wipe some cams for me 😃

TooFine: danny im not wiping the cams again so no one will have proof of you tripping backward and falling ass-first into a trashcan

Chaos: Speaking of, Tucker do you still have that footage and can you send it to me?

TooFine: already done

Daniel: noo it’s nothing like that this time 😫

Daniel: pleaseeee 🥺🙏🙏

Daniel: I’ll get you an autograph from Tim Drake-Wayne?

TooFine: deal.

Daniel: 🥳🎉

Daniel: ok so the footage from somewhere around 3 am last night

Daniel: around some place named park row??

Daniel: I think it’s called?? 🤔

Daniel: though I’m pretty sure I’ve also heard some people refer to it as crime alley

Daniel: not sure why tho 🤷

TooTine: aye aye captain o7

Chaos: Danny, in an alley getting attacked by the fucking Joker: I wonder why this place is called crime alley

Daniel: stop bullying me 😠

Chaos: No

TooFine: hey danny r u sure thats right? i checked the cams n stuff but theres no available footage from the area n time u described

TooFine: its like someones already wiped it all

Daniel: oh!

Daniel: that’s so sweet of him 😊

Chaos: Wait who is this ‘him’?

TooFine: the joker????

Daniel: oh no not the Joker

Daniel: just some cute guy I met last night

Daniel: he witnessed me killing the Joker 🫣

Daniel: and didn’t call the cops on me afterward 🥰💞

TooFine: def green flag

Chaos: Oh hell yeah, he’s a keeper

Chaos: Wait you killed the Joker?! I thought you just fought him off!

Daniel: it was an accident!! 😭😭

Daniel: he crept up on me and tried to grab me 😓

Daniel: so I got startled and because all I saw was a clown

Daniel: I just kinda punched his face in with my ghost strength… 😰

TooFine: f

Chaos: f

Sharpshooter: Have you gotten rid of the body yet? Did you leave behind DNA at the crime scene? Will I need to start saving up bail money or getting ready to enact the Fenton Break Out plan?

Chaos: Jazz asking the important questions here

Daniel: well, considering the footage was wiped

Daniel: and also the fact that no one’s found him yet

Daniel: I think it’s safe to assume it’s all taken care of

Daniel: that’s honestly really sweet of him though 🥰😊

TooFine: oohhhhh ur mystery boo??

Daniel: yeah, this random guy saw me vibe-checking the Joker

Daniel: and let me go home without any trouble

Daniel: pretty sure he’s the one who wiped the cams 🤔

Daniel: and then today he showed up at my apartment with flowers 🥺

Daniel: they were sweat peas!!!! 🥰🤩

Chaos: Was that to thank you for the murder orrrr?

Sharpshooter: Oh those are your favorite, was that on purpose?

Daniel: well I didn’t tell him

Daniel: so I’m not sure if he knew or if it was a coincidence 🤷

Daniel: but yeah then he took me out to this restaurant called Pete’s for dinner

Daniel: they had some amazing cannoli

Daniel: you should try it sometime if you get the chance

Daniel: and then after dinner he took me to the observatory!!!!!!! 🤩🥰

Sharpshooter: Gotham observatory?

Sharpshooter: Isn’t that the one with the special telescope, I think you mentioned it before

Daniel: yeah, the crystal-powered telescope!! 😍💞✨🤩❤️

Daniel: and at the end, he brought me home

Daniel: and he asked for my number!!!

TooFine: nice dude!

Chaos: The guy really went all-out and planned your dream date hu? So, what’s this mystery hunk’s name?

Daniel: oh I’m not sure, I didn’t ask 🙃🤭

Sharpshooter: Danny…

Daniel: yes?

Sharpshooter: Did you go on a date with a complete stranger who witnessed you commit a murder?

Chaos: How do you not even know his name?

Daniel: two words Jazz: Johnny 13

Daniel: and he’s not a stranger!! 😠

Sharpshooter: But you don’t know his name?

Chaos: We just can’t leave him alone, can we? Less than a week on his own and he already murdered one of Gotham’s most infamous rogues and then completely forgets the concept of Stranger Danger

Daniel: I mean he probably just found it when he tried to do some research on me or something

Daniel: probably got it from the school’s system now that I think of it 🤔

TooFine: dude who the hell is this guy??

Chaos: Who the fuck did you go on a date with?

Daniel: do you really think it was a date? 🥺😳

Daniel: I wasn’t sure

Daniel: cause he mainly took me out for dinner to thank me for the night before

Daniel: but then again

Daniel: he did get me flowers and ask for my number after he brought me back to my apartment 🤔

Daniel: like I wasn’t sure if I was reading the signals right…..

Daniel: but do you think that was a date? 🫣

Sharpshooter: Danny, for the love of the Ancients.

Sharpshooter: Who was it?

Daniel: oh, it was Red Hood 🥰

TooFine: damn dannys got that vigilante rizz

Sharpshooter: Red Hood? The crime lord?!

TooFine: former, actually

Daniel: what he said ^^

Chaos: Danny, you really have a type huh? Vigilantes with a Red theme. Who’s next? Red Robin?

Daniel: stop bullying me

TooFine: never

Chaos: Never

Daniel: on a different note, who changed my name in the chat again?

Sharpshooter: Ellie did.

Chaos: Ellie

TooFine: @TheCoolerDaniel

TheCoolerDaniel: 😎

TheCoolerDaniel: wait i just read back, danny’s dating a crime lord?? :0 👀

---

Taglist (for now, I’ll probably stop if I cant keep up):

@i-always-say-yea @uraniumwizard

#i had more planned for this chapter #but this already started to become too long #so the batfam reactions will hae to be in the next chap #sorry #anyway #dp x dc #dp x dc fic #dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc crossover #dead on main #dead on main ship #Danny in an alley getting attacked by the fucking Joker: I wonder why this place called crime alley #team phantom has questions #but then again weirder shit has happened #danny killing the joker and going on a date with red hood is barely in the top 10 of weird/fucked up shit he's done #he seems fine and happy so theyre not too worried #might be planning a shovel talk in a private chat tho #sam: alright ill get the creep stick #sam: jazz--#jazz: already getting the ecto-skeleton ready as we speak #oh for those who are curious #jazz and danny's private chat nicknames are references to invis-o-bill and jazzie-pants the nicknames #question: would anyone mind me adding some plot? it'll still be mainly crack of course #but i got a thought of how i could add in a lil plot #tho i won't do it if people prefer it like this #so let me know what y'all think

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homicidal-slvt · 1 year

Text

Your First Valentine's Day Together

MDNI

Creepypasta Head-Canons

GN/Reader

Warnings: None

Jeff The Killer

Forgot it was valentine's day and last minute grabbed something from the gas station. Thinks most Valentine's stuff is over priced and cheesy anyway.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Y/N." "Is this... A bag of chips..?"

Jane The Killer

Absolutely loves spoiling you and doing cute things for you, so there's a day dedicated to that??? Sign her the fuck up! She arranges to take you to a cute cat cafe and insists on paying for everything, seeing you smile is worth every penny.

"Jane you really didn't have to do all this!" "I just love making you smile."

Nina The Killer

Best. Day. Ever. She will be so excited to surprise you with a bunch of clothes she ordered online that's your style! Doesn't want to get any stereotypical things for you for Valentine's, only stuff she knows you'll enjoy.

"Ahhh! Y/N look at this cute shirt I bought you! I can't wait to see you wear it!~" "Another one???"

Toby Rogers

Is bouncing off the walls excited for Valentine's Day. Is VERY cheesy about it and probably absolutely buries you in every cute stuffed animal he could find. Will curl up and watch cheesy romance movies with you all day while munching on the chocolates he got for you.

"Y/N! Y/N!" "OH MY GOD TOBY IS THAT A GIANT GIRAFFE PLUSHIE?!?"

Clockwork

Teases you if you want to celebrate Valentine's Day, calling it cheesy and too lovey dovey. However secretly she loves it, but she's not going to tell you that- at least not yet. So, you're in charge of planning your date together.

"Oh really? You go for that cheesy crap?" "Come onnn! It will be fun! Please!"

Eyeless Jack

Jack doesn't get many chances to act like just a person anymore, so when Valentine's Day rolls around he wants to take the chance to just act like a normal couple would. He plans a quiet dinner just you two in his room, enjoying feeling human again. Just for today- you are just two people in love.

"Do you like the candles, Y/N?" "I love them. It's perfect."

Laughing Jack

This clown has no earthly idea what he's doing. He just straight up throws you a "Valentine's Party" like it's a birthday. It's sweet though. He's trying his best- even though he invited everyone so you two don't really get any time alone.

"Surprise Y/N!!!" "AH! Is that heart shaped confetti?!?"

Ben Drowned

Simply plans a gaming date for the two of you with lots of gummy worms. This really is just a normal day with him but he claims it's special because he won't hog all the gummies this time.

"C'mon! It'll be fun! Why go out when we can just stay right here?" "Fine... Move over."

Hobo Heart

Tries to plan something special for you two but has no idea what to do. He just wants you to love it! Finally settling on just a nice quiet coffee/tea date with just you and him. Cuddled up in the library reading books.

"Romance or Fantasy, Y/N?" "Why not both?"

Slenderman

Doesn't fully understand the concept of the holiday but isn't going to pass up a chance at treating you. He plans a lovely romantic evening in the underworld with dinner and wine. The man is a complete gentleman.

"Is this alright, Y/N?" "It's wonderful."

Zalgo

You want to spend Valentine's Day? With him? He finds the idea amusing at first but finally gives in, taking you out on the town in the underworld. Showing you off and buying you fancy clothes.

"Everything simply looks stunning on you!~" "Oh hush..."

Nathan The Nobody

He hasn't the faintest clue how to celebrate Valentine's Day with you but he knows he wants too. He simply comes to you and asks what you'd like to do.

"Want to just watch movies together?" "I'd like that very much, Y/N...."

The Puppeteer

Brushes off Valentine's Day. What's the point in something like that? You already have the perfect gift, getting to spend time with him! What more could you want???

"Pup, please!!! I just want to do something fun with you!" "This IS fun!"

Judge Angels

Takes the holiday very seriously, almost too serious! She insists she must make it absolutely perfect for you because you deserve it. Expect a fancy date and lots of dancing lessons, she loves dancing with you.

"Take my hand, Y/N." "You really went all out, didn't you?"

Bloody Painter

He makes you both some tea and you two spend a whole day in his studio. Laughing and cracking jokes while he paints a portrait of you, even offering to give you painting lessons. You just enjoy a lovely date full of giggles and messy paint.

"Aw, Y/N. You got paint on your nose." "Oops-"

Nurse Ann

She doesn't really talk much so she expresses her love for you through lots of hugs and attention. Quality time means the world to her so you two end up in the kitchen cooking together, after all a meal always tastes better if it's made with love.

"....." "I love you too, Ann."

Kate The Chaser

She doesn't exactly celebrate the holiday. She kind of just awkwardly offers you whatever she found in the pantry and hangs out with you for the day. It takes a long time for her to open up.

"Thank you, Kate." "..... No problem."

Homicidal Liu

He loves you dearly and wants you to always know that. He plans a beautiful picnic date at night, that way you two can gaze at the stars and tell each other what you see. Expect a dance in the moonlight, the crickets serving as your symphony. It feels like it's just the two of you in the world.

"This is so beautiful, Liu." "Almost as beautiful as you."

{More Content}

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blitzxiiru · 1 year

Note

U talked about people giving u scar ideas (in my case even more scar ideas).

P.S.: I LOVED the picture of Leo you drew with electricity scars! They looked very cool! I like how you did, at least with that picture, made them glow, just to make them stand out a bit more; looked awesome. Also, Leo looked hella feral in that picture, and I am ALWAYS here for feral Leo, lol.

And I just saw some clips and amvs (one of those clips being from TMNT clips tumblr) where Shredder almost crushed Leo to death and also threw him very far, hitting a car. I would link it, but tumblr hates me, and doesn't let me (at least currently) link stuff anymore in asks (maybe the Tumblr Gods will let me do so again someday...).

And then later on, in a different scene, he started trying to crush Leo's throat with his clawed hands (man, Shredder, haven't you already done enough damage to Leo's throat and/or windpipe, like sheesh, man!).

Also, since someone mentioned April (you drew her so pretty! And I liked the scars you gave her), Casey defin. would have SOME scars too. Like, for sure some head ones, pretty sure that dude got some and/or a lot of head injuries in that show and/or just scars from being such a brawler.

Also, Raph and Karai are brain worm/brain worms scars buddies! I say that, but that is sad as hell, poor Raph and Karai. I could see them bonding over it though. And Leo and Mikey just worrying about them when they talk about it (Donnie would too, but like, Leo is very much an overprotective sibling and would worry about and/or dote on his siblings/family/close friends, and Mikey worries about his big bros a lot, and knows when they are upset) sometimes.

we fr giving these boys more scars as if they don’t have enough of it already HHAHAHHAHA

thank you!!! i had a hell of a time time drawing that piece btw, it was super fun to draw feral leo. he really deserves to let off some steam.

i think i remember that scene, there was actually a recreation of it during that halloween episode in season 5 if i recall correctly?? poor boy got his arms crushed twice, by the SAME damn person..

shdgsjbdjsbd thank you again <33 april and casey was great to draw too, dude you have no idea how much i needed to touch up on drawing actual people since being hooked on tmnt bc i went literal weeks drawing turtles instead of humans LMAO thank god for muscle memory or else i would’ve forgotten completely. and, yes, absolutely! casey would def have some head injuries, and more centring around his arms and hands too. he’s buddies with mikey, since they both get head injuries so frequently.

karai and raph would tease each other about their brainworm scars lmao, they’d compare which one is nastier and neither would back down until the others have to mediate the two idiots into a draw. this happens everytime they meet btw

hope you enjoy my little doodles about these senarios :)

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eruhamster · 3 months

Text

james somerton apparently left a suicide note on some social media of his and hasnt been heard from and twitter has been trending about it all day because the conversation seems caught between 'oh well we hope he didnt commit suicide but no one is at fault for that' and 'hbomb is a woke devil and killed this guy. i only care because i hate hbomb' and like

it's legitimately so fascinating how hard it is for people to see any sort of middle-ground. that a guy making huge amounts of money, over $30k/mo on patreon, to create hours-long, snarky videos exposing people for their actions, who clearly knows these videos are done in a way that they incite a harassment campaign every time... and who continued to bring somerton up on twitter ... might be at least partially culpable if it turns out somerton did commit suicide.

obviously somerton needed to be deplatformed, obviously his plagiarism needed to be exposed, but hbomb's videos like the plagiarism video essentially function as the new Content Cop and go out of their way to incite harassment and hatred of the person for their actions, rather than only bringing the actions to light. these videos of his are so long because they hammer home "look how bad a person this person is! don't you hate him? look at each and every shitty thing he did! isn't he so shitty?!" - the plagiarism video specifically being long because it did that on top of going "and look at this even SHITTIER guy!" multiple times until you reached the final 'most shitty guy' of james somerton.

and it even struck me back then how malicious that video was when i couldn't make it past the internet historian part, because he began that section by saying how he personally doesn't like the guy, and then went on to compare entire paragraphs of text that were nothing alike, and 'expose' this guy for what really amounts to a minor citation issue that was dealt with privately and reuploaded without an issue - he was exposing a guy for 'plagiarism' that was already handled and removed, because he didn't like him. and then went on to go and push on to expose an entirely different guy as 'even shittier!!!' - you can't so recklessly be making malicious videos like that and not be criticized for being the cause of a mental health crisis.

it is very fascinating to me that no one really wants to think about what everyone on the internet hating you can do to a person. but maybe that'd mean people would have to think about their role in somerton's death (if he did die, that is), and that's not a can of worms a lot of people are interested in unpacking.

it's really reminiscent to me of celebrity journalism of the 2000s. stuff like TMZ, tabloids, paparazzi are all understood today as having caused many mental health crises in their time. the digital version of it, youtube 'journalists' and the following commentary youtubers and twitter dogpiles can just as easily cause that same issue. this should not be controversial to say. it's common sense.

#james somerton #hbomberguy

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merakiui · 9 months

Note

VNSJSCJSKKGKSKWKF PUNK JADE????? as a jade stan i am CLAWING my walls istg

so we have himbo jock virgin floyd,, WE HAVE TO ELABORATE ON PUNK JADE CUZ THE THOUGHT OF HIM JUST MAKES MY WORLD SHAKE

seriously still kicking my legs at that tag omg the thought of punk jade fkkfjsjjc like those stereotypical wattpad bad boys but somehow he's a little more charming and... tolerable (to an extent), i guess...

he leans on lockers, probably rides a motorcycle his rich ass mafia father gifted him, and is definitely brooding and mysterious, but oh my god is it so attractive... you don't mind and it's as if you were put into a spell; especially after you realize you're tangled up in the sheets of his bed, your mind hazy and memories hardly legible <3 you realize he's just as bad as his brother but then again, he's soooo much better in bed, you don't mind in the slightest anymore !!! <33333

fjsjjfjdkrjv i'm just spilling my brain worms now jade has affected me once again

— (a new-ish follower named star hehe <3)

orz punk Jade is so fine omg,,,,,, he has so many piercings, a few very intricate tattoos here and there, and in my heart he kills it on the electric guitar. <3 he rizzes you up with just a few chords and you know his fingers do more than skillfully play chords. Omg omg and he has a split tongue!!!!!!! He always wears his hair in messy styles, uses hair gel to keep it spiky when he wants it to be, and maybe he smokes on occasion; perhaps even coerces you into smoking. >:) getting high with him is an experience omg,,,,,,, maybe you hotboxed with him in Floyd's van once and the two of you kissed a few times and you learned that he's so good at kissing???? So much better than Floyd, and you have to wonder how he's leagues better when Floyd's so social, loved (and feared) by all, popular enough to be with anyone he wants. Jade's just so alluring in a way that his twin isn't. Whereas Floyd's all broad shoulders and bulk and muscle, Jade's all lean muscle and willowy and agile.

You don't trust him to take you for an innocent ride on his motorcycle, so Jade suggests using Floyd's van for stuff. Floyd doesn't really care because he's so busy with sports; his van is already messy enough (he draws the line at cum stains, though. At least, cum stains that don't belong to Floyd himself lol). It's a little unfair that Jade's really good at sex because you want to experience all of this technique with Floyd (who has yet to make you cum with his dick, mind you). Jade just knows what tips you over the edge. He wrings orgasms out of you like he's trying to prove something, and maybe he is. You never really paid much mind to him because he was the "quiet twin," the one who, despite his notable fashion and style, didn't really draw your eye.

Jade just loves showing up in your life when you're trying to avoid him and his bad influence. He teases you about that all the time, playfully calls you good girl/boy/goody-goody when you insist you're only visiting his apartment to see Floyd. He has the stickiest, sleaziest smile on his face when he lets you in, speaking in that mocking drawl of his, "You know Floyd has practice at this time, right?" And god you want to punch him, kick him in his dick, tear his hair out. But you don't because you can't. Because he's addicting. Because he's good at fucking you and talking to you and being your friend and making sure you're safe and sound when you have a bad trip and asking if it feels good when he lays you down in Floyd's van and ruts into you like he has all the time in the world. You hate him, but then you don't because he's so much better than Floyd. And of course you still like Floyd, but he doesn't hit in the way Jade does.

You wake up in his bed more times than you can count, twisted up in the sheets or, more recently, in his arms, and Jade has such a fun time teasing you for it. But then he's so tender in the mornings, so soft and gentle, caressing your cheek or pressing kisses over the marks he left the night prior. The two of you are way more than friends, but neither of you say anything to make it official and so you're stuck in a situationship that feels so comfortable and enjoyable.

Omg and when he plays the guitar for you....... orz Jade is the worst thing to ever happen to you (or so you adamantly claim), but he's also the best because if it weren't for him you'd never form such a genuine connection with him. <3 also, he opened your third eye. You shouldn't settle for bad, sloppy sex with his brother when he can fuck you six ways from Sunday and leave you satisfied each time. He takes immense pride in this, too. Annoying, but you love him. You really, truly, honestly do.

#twisted chit chat #n/sfw #star anon #hi hiiii star!!! welcome to my blog <3 <3 #aaaa thank you for sending punk jade ramblings #i am not normal about him in the slightest >_<

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