Tumgik
#and a part of me is like suck it up you’ve been dealing with this for a year it’s not actually a big deal
indigos-stardust · 3 days
Text
New Four swords fic- Chapter 1
*I'd appreciate if u read it on a03 because that's where my tag/summary is but if you cant for whatever reason, I have it below this cut* thanks for any boost and comment <3
Roaming packs of monsters, ugh.  Usually, monsters tend to be attracted or even magically appear from places with plenty of darker energy. It could be some cursed and abandoned temple or some pit where someone died horribly. Maybe, there’d just be one huge monster claiming an area and its magical stink would attract a bunch of underlings.
Monsters aren’t exactly pack animals like wolves. They just follow whichever one’s the biggest and act purely based on greed and violence. They’re happy to follow orders as long as they get their cut. Which is usually the promise of fresh flesh. 
The scouts said the monsters were following paths. On a schedule. Almost like they’re planning and guarding. That…isn’t right. Something is definitely up. 
The worst part of it is that a lot of the paths they’re taking seem to be cutting off a random average sized fishing village to the south. Lutelin Village. Yeah, Green can see why they had been specifically called to handle this one.
Whatever they’re going to eventually face, it’ll probably seem like even an experienced knight’s worst nightmare. But they can handle it. After all, they’d handled far more with far less. This time they even have armor! The odds are far more in favor since their… “adventure.” Green can’t help but fidget with his fingers anyways.
He’s probably just out of practice, sure they had helped fight against the general excess of monsters but that was just dealing with monsters sprawled out everywhere. Not a real proper fight with layers to get to the final baddie. His gut flares with a hidden anxiety. 
It’ll be alright though, the others are literally following his back, and as much as it sucks that those villagers are probably having a hard time with travelling due to the monsters- This will be good for them! Well, Green and his uh, other selves, anyways. Besides, why would you possibly want “rest and relaxation” when you can just crush the ugly mug of some monster?
Okay, maybe he is spending too much time with Blue.
Either way they definitely have better odds! They’ll just find each band (two or three?) and take them down, easy peasy. 
Every step is going to take him closer after all, might as well keep his shoulders straight and his eyes on the horizon.  
Soft grass and weeds dance in the foothills, with a chilly autumn air as their partner. As much as the others are way too gripey in the early morning, Green knows getting them up early is definitely the right call! The soft crispness of the morning air energizes him with every breath! Practically music, in his humble opinion. 
Behind him, he can hear another kind of music. A playful punch to the shoulder, a content sigh, and a little laugh. Conversation that starts and pauses, only to start again. In and out, natural and welcoming. They have his back. 
They finally stop at the top of a particularly large hill; this is the spot the scouters said they’d seen the monsters the most. If Green looks to the West, he can see the beginning treeline of a dark and confusing magic-filled Lost Woods. He shudders. From what Vio described about the woods, it definitely doesn’t seem like the ideal spot for a stroll. Compared to their “adventure” and all they’ve experienced, the next few days will be easyyyy. 
They’ve barely settled into their spot when Vio, ever the watchful one, already spots a band of monsters practically marching together. A very large band of very angry looking monsters. Nearly time to fight. A cliffside looms in the distance, with the monsters in between them and it. 
“I’d say, I think we’re dealing with about eight or so stalfoes, two spear moblins, oh you’ve got to be kidding me at least two dozen,” Green squints, “uh, tiny plant things?”
Strange little hobbling plant monsters, with sharp teeth and leaves coming from a single bud supported by two stumpy legs, covered the ground near the other monsters. 
“Tiny plant things?’”
=====
For a place full of nothing but rolling hills, Vio sure is having quite a bit of difficulty finding enough room to fight. It’s ridiculous honestly, he and Green were supposed to take care of the stalfoes by directly fighting against them. Meanwhile, Blue and Red were meant dealing with those pesky small monsters that keep trying to bite their ankles! Or jump into their faces. It’s a bit hard to fight several monsters just taller than you while dealing with a bunch of faces full of teeth trying to lunge at you, afterall.
Not to mention, once they finally get in semi-decent positions the moblins thrust their giant axes right in the middle and scatter everyone all over again! He can hear the annoying squish and splatter of Blue’s hammer smashing into another one. 
Red’s fire rod is great at helping to keep the moblins away, but while you would think it’d be great for its intended purpose of burning those DAMN little plants monsters- All it really does is make all the grass around them catch on fire, not harming the stalfoes, and force them to bolt to a patch of rocks while they’re being chased. Of course, the little abominations climb up the stalfoes to stay safe from the fire. Fighting on the bumpy ground only makes things worse in their favor. He really wishes the darn things would be the ones stumbling and struggling for balance instead of themselves.  
Wait… This is a far rockier area- He can feel the rattling bones hit his shield once more as he grunts to shove it off. They all need to be knocked down. With the bit of distance he looks around, and there . A pile of rocks, leading up to a cliff. The cliff is extremely uneven at the top, but there is just enough clear space for a person at the top! 
Perhaps, possibly, it had been a bit of a.. Risky endeavor. The second there’s the smallest opening, he yells out, “Watch out for a minute!” and bolts to the cliff side. Ignoring Blue’s very p*ssed off , “h-HEY! Where the Hell are you going?!!” and Green’s surprise as he keeps on running. Every thump of his feet pushing off the earth ringing in his ears. Or maybe that’s just his heartbeat.
Just as he’s starting to climb up he can hear the rattling of a stalfoe and feel the bruising pain of those small monsters trying to reach his flesh under the armor. I just need to keep going , he thinks as he finishes pushing himself up and begins scrambling  for a new foothold as he simultaneously tries to shake off the miniature snapping beasts. Good thing his ears are protected by the chainmail underneath his cap. 
The crash and shattering of bones with a string of swears behind him urge him to go even further up. When the battle’s over, Blue is probably going to get him next. He hadn’t sounded particularly pleased about Vio, “DITCHING THEM WITHOUT WARNING LIKE A B****H*SS,” or whatever. Despite his current height bringing him farther from the battle ground, he can practically hear Green shout, “ LANGUAGE!!” in the middle of battle.
Finally, just as he nears the top he manages to shake the last of those damn pests off his leg and let his heaving lungs rest, if only for a second. Right, this needs to be quick. Forcing himself up, still struggling to breathe from the chaotic climb, Vio readies his bow. 
While the experience of fighting various types of monsters, for hours on their own, certainly gave them a lot of skill in adapting to the situation he has to admit—the items they gained, namely his fairy blessed bag of endless arrows, are also a huge plus. Sure, they aren’t as strong as a well crafted bow, but they are endless . In fact, he’d figured out that if he shoots two at once, even if that took a while to master, it’d do the same amount of damage!
He smirks to himself, aiming straight at a stalfoes that is creeping behind Green. With a snap, the stalfoe falls to the ground. The chaos of the battle field, swarming the others with monsters, moving from place to place… it’s familiar; it is a refreshing challenge. Others might’ve balked at the daunting task, but Vio is looking forward to it. It’s time to show off.
With the constant barrage of arrows knocking out stalfoes, allowing Red and Blue more room to work with and giving Green a much needed relief , the numbers begin to thin. He’s even able to start getting hits on the charging moblins, stunning them just long enough for a quick burn or slash on them. There are only a few straggling plant monsters as well. 
It’s wrapping up. Vio observes as the Moblin he shot finally falls to the ground. It is time to regroup. Or it would’ve been. 
He doesn’t know what he feels first. He can’t even think to process it. The tension of every single muscle spasming. Millions of needles endlessly searing into his flesh. From the inside and outside. Little pieces of him, like miniature marbles bursting outward. The shock of the constant repeated force fracturing and fracturing. The burning in his chest, he can’t breathe. 
It’s so, so much, it’s too much. Without a single thought, other than the sensation of indescribable pain, he falls silently down the cliff. Even as his body crashes down onto the unforgiving rocks it still spasms. Red screams before Blue and Green even see what happened.
—--------------------------------
I can’t! No, no, no, no, no, no!!!! Red can’t panic right now, but by Hylia does he want to scream and selfishly look away-
It was horrible, and he saw every second of it. He had stepped back for just a moment, to chug a magic energizing potion. They still had more monsters to fight, after all, and his magic stores were nearly drained from using the rod so much. But then he saw a spark to his right, all the way up where Vio had gone. A sparkling, bright white yellow light, blasting into Vio’s back. Now, he watches.  
Vio looks like he’s choking, like every single bit of him was choking and dying . His piercing scream is silently cut off, and then he falls . He falls and falls until his back hits the rocks and he goes stumbling down, blood splattering against the rocks. Red doesn’t want to know where it’s all coming from. And then Vio is there, sprawled on the ground, a horrible finale. He’s still screaming. 
No, no Vio isn’t the one who’s screaming. He can see his bloody face against the dirt. Red is. 
Blue grabs his arm, nearly shaking him as he tells him to LOOK before he runs off to Vio. Red’s shaking, then he follows Green’s startled eyes they lead back to the top of the cliff. He can only stare as a hulking Darknut trudges behind a row of stubby moblin archers, and even more stalfoes that have already begun jumping off to attack them. Oh, and a bunch of tektites. Because, well, why not at this point?
 Red usually tries to stay optimistic, because you can’t get anything done if you always have a bad attitude all the time for no reason but- Honestly? He’s pretty sure he hates EVERYTHING right now. It’s, it’s alright though- They, they’ve got him- Well, well they all would if Vio was down. But, it isn’t the time to focus on that, they have to keep them away from Vio and defeat them! 
Just because he’s terrified that Vio could be dying this very second, doesn’t mean he can just start crying when they need him! He will go on, and he will be hopeful! Because Green and Blue need him, and they trust him to at least support them! Red refuses to let them down. Even if he really wants to go cry in a hole right now. 
Green screams at Blue, “ DON’T MOVE HIM! We need to get them away from him, Red get here and create a blast! Cut them off!”
Red’s already sprinting. Blue’s hammer smashes into another stunned skull from Green’s boomerang. They’re working to get the monsters away from Vio. The second he arrives the entire earth THUDS as the colossal Darknut finally joins the battle. It’s beady eyes, under its helmet land on Red. 
“HEYYYY!!!, come here you, uh, you ugly face!!!” The monster trudges forward, away from Vio and towards him. The Colossal Axe glistens, ready to slice into him in seconds. 
“Yeahh!” Red waves his fire rod, sparkling in the burning sunlight, like a shiny fish in front of a starved beast. “Come here!!!”
The axe whizzes through the air with the speed of a bolt of lightning, ready to spear him into two. Red barely dodges. Before the monstrosity can take an even more petrifying swing, Green’s magical boomerang connects. The powerful thing freezes the beast for a valuable 5 seconds. 
Within those 5 seconds a few things happen. A small series of whistles rings throughout the battle field within seconds, a code that only they know.  During their quest, they had learned that just yelling out to each other with their own plans always ended up poorly. Maybe, they were all just too stubborn in their own plans, but it definitely wasn’t helped by the fact they could barely hear each other at times. Sensitive Hylian ears or not, in the midst of battles words become drowned out easily. 
Green’s message, a mix of quick patterns, order: B-G- Core Threats & Close Combat- R- Long Distance Quick. Blue and Green would take care of the strongest enemies and the ones that required close combat. Red would take care of the archers,as fast as possible so he could provide them aid. He could run and prepare ahead just on instinct before he even processed it. It was a mercy, afterall… Every second in a battle is precious, especially with someone left in total vulnerability. 
Red breathes in, the blins are readying their bows.  Then exhales, a small yet vicious blast of fire spirals forward causing at least two of them to shriek as they desperately try to put themselves out. His shield is already out by the time the other three’s arrows have hit his shield. As much as Red would prefer to shoot more and scorch them while going in and out, that just wasn’t an option. The best way to stop them from shooting far out into the others, was to get in the way before they could do that. 
Red forces his way through with his shield to break their line and immediately his sword lunges straight into the throat of one of those wretched things. He has to take care of the other monsters, but Red let’s himself smile a moment at the sign of the bubbling blood. Good . He hoped that was the one that shot Vio. 
He has to dodge back quickly in the next moment though, despite the moblins having nothing but bows and arrows, that didn’t make them useless in the slightest. While the armor would definitely protect him from slashes it certainly wouldn’t protect him from their nasty claws aiming at his throat and eyes. 
He hacks away at another one that leapt out in front of him before he even got the chance to orient himself. Keep it steady, keep the pace and breathe. Red tries to slash at one of the monster’s belly, but he’s off balance by one of the burnt ones slashing at his leg! I really need to do better!! Red mentally slapped himself, how’d that one even get there? He seriously needed to keep track of everything or else he’d be hit in his blind spot again. Next time may not be so lucky. His free foot crushes the bastard's neck as he blocks more scrabbling claws away with his shield. 
Red is skewering the one that he had shoved off when he sees the two remaining unburnt monsters dashing toward him with arrows in their hands. What the hell? Oh, the arrows were sparkling yellow with the same crackling sound as a bomb about to burst. It was familiar. Vio . 
All three are charging and from the looks of it they’re trying to trap him with two heading up to his sides and the first one straight in front of him. Red charges right back at the right one bashing into it’s skull with his sword and spinning around, sword first, to face the others. It’s BURNING-  
His sword clumsily sliced into an arm, but the arrows- Those arrows, the moment of contact of it against his own sword make his arm convulse in pain as he yells out. Red’s sword is on the ground. The monster, reeling from its own pain, slashes back at him. Thankfully his armor prevents it from truly getting him. It’ll definitely bruise though. The pain threatens to bring him down, but gasping for air with teary eyes he forces his wobbly legs up anyways. Like the lightning wizzrobe- This doesn’t make sense- Oh great fairies please-
Red knows the dangers of magical exhaustion, he’d lived through it several times on their quest. Vio’s words echoed in his mind, “ Take care to not overdo it! Potions may provide a great boost and aid in recovery, but your body still needs time. You’re exhausted… Green was right about how dangerous it is, besides-” and then Vio softly grinned, “ If you’re too tired who’s going to keep us going? We need your laughter, alright?”
He can already feel the aching soreness creeping on the edge of his fingers. He grabs the rod anyways, and this time there’s a blast. Red doesn’t know quite how it’s happening, but the strange arrows seem to make the flames stronger. They topple onto the Earth and the last half-dead burnt straggler has finished crawling its way to him. Red’s sword in his uninjured hand stabs into the beast’s guts with a wet sound. It dies slowly, scraping at his feet desperate to fight until it's inevitable death. Then, just like the others it rapidly deteriorates into a puddle of steaming filth on the ground. 
21 notes · View notes
lesbiansanemi · 6 months
Text
Me: maybe 8 days off will fix me, maybe going back to work won’t be so bad. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s alright
Also me: *is at work for less than two hours and already Wants to Die* Ah. Great.
#this morning already frustrated me#because so much shit was done wrong or wasn’t done at all while I was gone#because I basically manage the department even though that’s NOT MY JOB#so ofc I come back and everything is on fire and everyone is one omg you HAVE to fix this we just couldn’t do it/figure it out 🥺#when it’s something that’s so simple they just didn’t wanna do it well or right#but also#the stupid fucking gm was like ‘hey I need to talk to you. it’s about your disability accommodation’#and I. a fool. got really excited like omg!! are they finally going to approve it!!!#no. no. he basically told me to get fucked and it wasn’t going to happen#he said I could WEAR A FAN????? AROUND MY NECK???? and use that for white noise but that was it????#what???? the FUCK?????#number one I cannot express how much worse a fucking FAN going in my ears all day long would just make my sensory overload 10 times worse#but also how is that not MORE of a distraction and ‘unprofessional’ than just letting me wear my fucking headphones#I feel like crying. I just want to not leave work with a developing migraine every day because of sensory reasons#and a part of me is like suck it up you’ve been dealing with this for a year it’s not actually a big deal#at least you CAN work and it’s not so bad that you can’t that’s a privilege#and like… yeah…. but I literally feel so drained and miserable every single day#and this stupid job makes me want to kms#but I can’t quit cuz the pay is too good#and it’s just so frustrating because they’re like ‘we’re such a good and diverse company we treat our employees so well’#and the general public thinks it’s a GREAT company#so I just constantly here about how great and awesome and inclusive they are#but they won’t even let me have the accommodation of wearing fucking headphones#something every other job has let me do….#and it makes me so mad on behalf of every other person who probably got told no over disability accommodations for even more important and I#intensive things#and I just. yeah. I kinda wanna cry#but as always I cannot cry because I’m so emotionally stunted that all I can ACTUALLY feel are pissed off and frustrated#anyways. I need to break something#kaz rambles
4 notes · View notes
jinkiezzsstuff · 2 months
Note
Hello! Can I plz request Alastor x Doe! Reader where he meets Charlie's best friend who's the reader and becomes possessive over her, maybe his instincts tell him to mark the reader as his mate. The reader is a white doe. :)
Yessss i love this idea teehee i maybe got carried away and also i unintentionally made this sort gender neutral and a teeny tiny speck of smut, i hope that’s okay if not it’s at the very end so it’s skipable, hopefully i did your idea justice and hope you enjoy!! thank you so much for this xx
At first sight
PART TWO PART THREE
Word count: 3.5K
Warnings: SMUT 18+, doe reader only describes white ears tail and pink nose rest is ambiguous, possibly corny ahh dialogue, love at first sight kinda trope, angel/hellborn reader, slightly OOC Al y’know smut love, reader cooks, biting & briefly blood, penetrative sex, reader makes deal with al to give themselves to him, swearing, NOT PROOFREAD I think that’s it lmk if i missed anything!!
Tumblr media
Charlie ran manically around the hotel, fixing various things and studying the entire building under a microscope to ensure it looked its best. Zipping her way to the lobby, she caught the gaze of Angel Dust, who was in the middle of sucking down a frozen popsicle.
“Be nice today! Look your best, oh oh! No porn on the TV!” Charlie shouted rushed and frazzled as she came up beside Angel to fluff out the couch cushions. Husk watched silently ears zeroed in on the conversation unwillingly, focusing mainly on Angel. “Geez toots, what’s got your feathers in a bunch?”
Angel smiled amused by Charlies odd demeanour. “My best friend since, like, forever is coming here today! To see the hotel!” Charlie exclaimed lurching forward to grip Angels shoulders. Smirking at her Angel continued to suck on the popsicle. “So what, is this broad special or something?”
Charlie leaned back pulling her hands down her face, an exasperated groan crawling out from her throat. “Yes! Her mother was friends with my mom when they first came to hell, her mom ended up falling for a hell spawn and we born around the same time,” Charlie explained ringing her hands while pacing.
“She’s my best friend we grew up together, i’m worried she won’t like what i’m doing here.” Charlie finally confessed with a sigh, her body deflating as she herself came to terms with the fact she was afraid. Vaggie lingering in the background finally approached Charlie sticking her hand out to message her arm comfortingly. “I’m sure it’ll be fine toots! Plus she’s a born sinner! Ain’t no way anything here’s gonna be shocking her.”
Despite her worry she could admit Angel Dust was right, AND you’re her best friend there’s no way you’d be unnecessarily cruel to her dreams, you were always supportive and imaginative along with her. Smiling down at Angel, Charlie then plopped down beside him, resting her hooves after hours of hecticily running around. “You’re right Angel, thank you.” Angel hummed out an arrogant ‘you’re welcome’ while Vaggie circled the couch leaning over the back of it.
“So how long has it been since you’ve seen them?” Vaggie asked poking Charlie’s cheek. Looking away she counted on her fingers before turning to look at Vaggie. “Four years, they stayed with me while I tried getting over the absence of my mom; they live in wrath though and eventually went back.” Clapping her hands Charlie stood from the couch her brief moment of hoof rest over, the three sinners watching as she muttered to herself about everyone being on their best behaviour while walking off, clearly the talk only did a little to hush her nerves.
~
Standing outside the hotel doors your ears twitched at the sounds coming from beyond it, it’s clear as day that Charlie was instructing people to behave, be nice, and- not show you porn? Suddenly the door opened startling you slightly but that quickly wore off when you were greeted by the joyous face of your best friend Charlie. Tugging you into a bear hug, Charlie squealed about how excited she was, you naturally fell into her giving her a warm tight hug right back.
“I am so glad you’re here! I’m so happy to see you!” Charlie exclaimed pulling back and examining you. You hadnt seemed to change much to Charlie, the white tail you had wagged behind you happily, your equally platinum ears relaxed occasionally twitching at the sounds around you, your pink deer like nose that was perfectly contrasted with your skin colour.
It was clear you were half an angel, and Charlie lemented, when you two were younger, that she was jealous you had a more animalisitc appearance in comparison to her, but you reminded her that it didn’t matter because she was still as gorgeous as ever. “I’m so glad to be here! I was starting to think you’d never end up inviting me.” You laugh warmly.
Charlie beckoned you inside linking your arms together, the two of you walked inside. Vaggie was punctuated and ready to great you as you came further into the room. “Hi, I’m Vaggie-“ Vaggie was cut off promptly by Charlie who excitedly pulled her into a bear hug, cheek to cheek. “My girlfriend!” Charlie finished with a shout.
Your ivory tail flicked behind you happily as you grinned. “Holy shit! You’ve got a girlfriend? Damn we really need to catch up! Its so nice to meet you Vaggie.” You smile shaking her hand as she stuck it out, Vaggie only nodded smiling seemingly quite reserved.
After some rushed introduction of those around the room including Husk, Angel, Nifty, and Sir Pentious, Charlie took you to your room to settle in. Closing the door behind the two of you Charlie watched as you laid your suit cases down by the bed, unzipping them and pulling out your clothing. “Sooo,” Charlie trailed hands tucked behind her back as she wandered around the vacant room.
“You remember Alastor right? The radio demon?” Charlie questioned, sounding suspicious. Looking up from your folded laundry you quirked a brow fearing where this might be heading. “Yes… i do.” You say slowly, fixing your posture waiting for her to turn to you, but she seemed rather interested in the wallpaper. “Well… y’know… this hotel takes a lot…. and when i first started…” Charlie trailed off gazing out the open window, stepping towards her you carefully placed a hand on her shoulder.
Looking at you she knew there was no sense in keeping such a prominent part of the reason this hotel was possible secret. “Alastors here, he helped since the start. He hasn’t asked for anything in return and he’s already fought for us!” Charlie spat the words out so fast you barely had time to comprehend. You and her were raised around each other meaning you had the same interactions with many of the princes’, sins, and hellborn, but human overlords were always were more…. well they weren’t used to power and immortality so they often over did it, Alastor was no different from what you were aware of.
“Are you sure having him is a good idea? Does your dad know?” Charlie nodded confirming her dad did know. “Yeah he doesn’t know who Al is, and to be fair none of us did! I promise he’s not that bad. Give him a chance?” You hummed looking away as she looked to you, you didn’t want to upset her by the discomfort that would be evident in your eyes. You didn’t enjoy brawls and fights, and you fear the demon would initiate that.
“Well i suppose i could trust him if you do, but i am skeptical; you’re always seeing the light in demons, even when it’s not there.” You laughed out recalling some things of the past that ended poorly because of a Charlie’s trust in certain sinners. And though at times foolish it was still an admirable trait and you aspired to be as kind hearted as she could be. “Where’s the guy anyways?” You asked after a short moment of pondering.
Charlie shrugged looking as if she was trying to recount the day. “Well he did say he had a meeting with Rosie,” She muttered quietly, although you didn’t know who Rosie was, you didn’t bother questioning it instead you pat Charlie on the shoulder, telling her that you’d like to get some rest, and you’d worry about Alastor later.
And so you spent a bit of time unpacking your things and settling down, you always preferred to be more in touch with the animalistic parts of yourself so your belongings held a lot of earthy aesthetics to them. Sitting on your bed, stripped of the hotels sheets and remade with your own, you opened your laptop and began typing.
You had forgotten about Alastor for the most part but you remember Charlie brining it up as he began his tyranny after his death. Charlie had always been pretty involved with her people, mainly focusing her energy on human sinner so you weren’t surprised that she knew of him, you were however surprised she was so willing to let him in when he massacred her people.
After a few minutes of light research about the demon, you established with how long he was gone perhaps he would be willing to change however you’d keep up your guards just to be sure.
~
Humming to himself Alastor got ready for the day, though he rarely slept he did occasionally get into evening outfits if he was staying in. He fixed his hair, ensuring not a hair was out of place and with a finally dust of his sleeves, he materialized his microphone and trotted his way out of his room.
A new scent hit him the minute he got to the staircase, the reaction was instantaneous, his ears perked, his tail stiffened thank the hellions no one was around to witness his discomfort, because it was evident. Fixing his posture, and his smile, he pretended nothing was up and continued his way downstairs. He greeted Husk as usual, and like usual Husk only grunted at the demon.
Making his way into the kitchen Alastor was stunted in place by the sight in front of him. There you stood deer tail wagging, singing along to music as you mixed a bowl of who knows what together. Alastor observed you quietly as ever, and definitely not checking you out because that would be rude- however your tail was very much distracting.
Clearing his throat the static spitting out behind his voice, you jumped slightly at the sound of him, looking over your shoulder to where he stood at the kitchen entry. The two of you simply stared at each other for a moment, the song in the background seemingly quieter than before, as if the two of you were in your own little zone.
Alastor couldn’t describe the gravitational pull he had toward you, he would’ve been a fool to deny your beauty, but he’d never had issue admitting when a demon or person was beautiful, it didn’t matter to him, so he couldn’t grasp why you seemed to have an immediate effect on him.
You too felt similarly gawking at the sight of him, i mean you’d never seen pictures of him, only art or depictions, which really didn’t do him any good. You were honestly a little embarrassed, you thought he was incredibly handsome, contrary to your beliefs prior to this moment, and you felt a little silly to suddenly feel like going back on your apprehension about him simply because of how attractive he was.
Deciding to finally break the intense yearning gaze the two of you held, Alastor perked up stepping close to you swinging his hand out to shake. “Alastor darling, pleasure to meet you, quite the pleasure.” Going unnoticed by you, Alastor’s voice involuntarily dropped lower, making it come out more sultry than he’d ever done during an introduction. Of course Alastor was aware it wasn’t his normal voice and wondered why the hell he decided to modify his tone to come out as seductive as it did; was it just by nature?
“I’m YN, Charlie’s best friend. I don’t know if you knew i was staying but i am, surprise! Heh,” You say a little nervously sticking out your hand but quickly retracting it, as it was covered in dough. “I’m making bread and breakfast, do you like french toast?” You finish finally gaining the courage to meet his gaze properly.
His eyes were lidded, and he looked down at you only with his eyes keeping his head forward, which made you feel some type of way. He had such a big presence, height aside, that would make anybody on the receiving end of his heated gaze, shrink. “I suppose i wouldn’t mind a little bite to eat, tell me little doe, how do you make such a meal?”
Of course Alastor knew what french toast was, but he’d much prefer to play stupid so he could listen to you speak, and have you look up at him so deliciously. “Well, i’m making some homemade no yeast bread, and then i’m gonna do the egg and frying, normally i mix some cinnamon and honey in, but i might not since i don’t know what you guys like. A lot of people put syrup, but i can’t stand it; too sticky.” You explained mixing all of your ingredients, turning to him you smiled.
“Would you mind greasing the pan for me, please?” Alastor nearly purred at you with how you requested his help he would’ve bent himself backwards if it meant you’d ask him like that again. The way these emotions hit him in the gut; the undeniable feeling of desire he was trying to fight against was incredibly intense and oddly, he liked it. “Of course my dear, whatever you wish, i shall see to.” With the snap of his fingers his hair had been pulled back, suit jacket gone, leaving him in only his white button up, and a pink apron.
Shamessly your eyes roamed his figure watching as he began to grease the pan with his hand. His eyes still lidded and smile relaxed. You enjoyed how he stood tall and relaxed, and it was only now when you caught a peek of his red tail that you realized; “You’re a deer?”
Alastor paused momentarily, eyes lazily difting toward you. He didn’t mind that you saw his tail, and he was a little surprised you lacked to notice he was a deer. “What did you think i was sweetheart?” Alastor exclaimed his entertainment persona peeking through as he did. You peeled your eyes away feeling a little bad for staring at him, instead you focused on placing the bread into the bow greased pan before responding. “Maybe a fox, but to be honest i didn’t think too much about it.”
Alastor hummed in agreement, watching as you placed the bread in to the oven. There weren’t many does Alastor has seen, many bucks but does were more of a rarity. The two of you made breakfast, bantering about things here and there and getting to know one another.
“What’s earth like?” You asked watching him prepare dough for beignets which he insisted you tried as it was a lousiana breakfast staple- but also because he wanted to have you to himself just a bit longer, and show off his cooking skills. “What do you mean dear?” Alastor questioned brows furrowed slightly, but his inquiry came soft with no judgement. “I’m not human, moms an angel, dad was one of the few hell borns that kinda just popped up, we don’t know where he went to though, anyways i’ve never seen the earth.”
Now that, was news to him. He suspected you were something special based off the tugging feeling he had toward you, but being a literal angel wasn’t something he would’ve bet on, but should’ve guessed on. Without a worry in his mind, Alastor happily told you about his home in new orleans, what it was like being a radio host, how in got into voodoo, how he new some cajun french, as well as his mother.
Leaning on the counter head rested on his hand, looking at you dreamily while the beignets fried. “My mother was an angel, she was my biggest supporter at the time, the reason i kept pushing. I have the upmost respect for mothers like mine.” You, as equally lost in the dream like bliss Alastors presence brought you, smiled at his story’s ogling at the man who spoke so highly of his mom. “That’s the sweetest Alastor, I wish i could’ve met the woman who made you into such a gentlemen.” You flirt subtly gently patting his arm.
Alastor hummed a lovesick smile on his face his tail wagging happily behind him as the two of you continued to yap. Tails syncing with the way they swayed unnoticed by you two as you lost yourselves in eachother, also going unnoticed was Charlie giddy as could be, in the background jumping up and down. Slipping away to Vaggie, Charlie gripped her like she was her life line. “YN and Alastor are totally going to get together! Ahh!” Charlie squealed shaking a limp Vaggie back and forth.
~
“Mhm Alastor please please please,” You chant wrapped tightly around the demons waist, as he pressed you up against your dresser. After a full day of being alongside Alastor the tension snapped between you two, although it took a few things to get there. First Angel hitting on you right after breakfast, it made Alastor seethe the symbols and static materializing as he watched Angel hit on you. It made Alastor realize such a sweet doe like you must be marked, can’t have other buck or demon filth thinking they can just put there hands on you.
The second thing that egged him on was when the two of you went for a stroll together, and while in a store witnessed a demon repeatedly harass you while you simply tried to pick out a dress! Alastor apologized for the blood shed, but he professed he needed to obliterate that demon to protect you and that would be the only time he would ever put you in a position to see such things. Which made your heart flutter, you felt the desire to have him protect you, it’s not like you couldn’t do it yourself but it made you weak in the knees to have a demon like Alastor jumped to protect you.
Thrusting into you needily, Alastor growled like a mad man his hand climbing up your body to grab your cheeks gently fixing your gaze up to him. “You’re mine,” Static laced his tone as he hissed out at you, pushing his body flush to yours. Moaning like a whiny porn star, you nodded in your head in a daze. “My mate,” He muttered again breathing deeply as he clenched his teeth.
Reaching your hands up to grab his antlers that sprout, you couldn’t help the way your body shook and the way you lewdly moaned. You felt so electrified and couldn’t contain the pleasure Alastor was making you feel. “Please Al, I love it so good,” You whined against his lips, his smile closed and strained as his lips brushed against yours, your breath tickling him as you whined.
Smashing your lips together Alastor picked up the pace feeling like a wild animal. He wanted you, forever, he wanted you to be his one and only, his only doe. Making himself hornier with the thought of having you all to himself his static crackled loudly as he thought up something mischievous. Pulling back from your heated kiss, you whined begging him to kiss you, touch you and fuck you, smiling at you in your disheveled state, a green huge suddenly engulfed the room.
The two of you lit up like neon as symbolize shined in the background. “Give yourself to me little doe, be my mate for entirety and the world is yours, anything you or your friends want i will give you. I can’t let such a thing like you go, i need you.” Alastor statically said, it sounded quite ominous but you were too horny to pick up on that, you could only pay attention to the need you had between your legs and in your heart. Alastor wanted you to be his forever, linked to you for eternity. Perhaps it was the fact that you were both deer that you two had this simultaneous connection, but regardless you couldn’t care you just wanted him back as much as he wanted you.
Thrusting yourself upward into him, you gripped his hand, while clenching down on him at the same time. “Yes, always i’m yours only; it’s a deal.” You moaned. Growling demonically Alastors green disputes like electricity, escaping this room and flowing through the hotel like wave. Feeling his heart bloom Alastors ears clipped back as he jackhammered into you, the dresser slamming against the wall while you squealed a little giggle bubbling out from how needy he became. That giddiness left as a violent hot mass washed over you, screaming out a moan you clutched Alastor, singing out his name through moans of appreciation as he coaxed you with praises through your orgasm.
It shook your body, and soon after Alastor came to a halt inside you, biting down hard on your neck. You moaned his name, not even feeling pain as he sunk his teeth into you down to the gum. After a few moments of licking up your blood he pulled away gazing into your fucked out eyes. As you were about to tell Alastor that you needed to figure out why you were both so suddenly connected, Charlie bolted in.
“YOU MADE A DEA- FUCK IM SORRY!” Within the span of two seconds Charlie had two separate panic attacks, one because she saw the green deal making light shoot through the hotel while you were alone with Al, and the second right after she closed to door from seeing the two of you intertwined at the hips.
3K notes · View notes
thebibliosphere · 2 months
Note
Ma'am/Sir/Other
So much of your blog is "Yaya another thing in my body broke (kill me)"
I'm not judging at all, cause I'm also dealing with that somewhat but,
In the most polite manner possible;
How the fuck do you manage to function without killing everyone around you in a bodily pain induced rage.
Body hurts too much.
But in all seriousness, therapy and a whole lot of radical acceptance.
I don't approve or like what’s happening to me, but realistically, there is no way to avoid it, so I either have to accept it and make changes to my life or reject it and increase my suffering.
It might take me a while to process this change and there might be a few screaming breakdowns in the interim (”it's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair!”) but after a long time of doing this type of therapy, I’ve gotten good at holding my own hand and holding myself through the despair.
It’s a bit like being my own gentle parent. Like “hey bud, I know this sucks and you’re feeling a lot of big emotions right now. And I’m not asking you to stop feeling them, but I do need you to eat and drink before you get sick, okay? Okay, you’ve had some water, do you want to try for a shower? No? Okay, let’s go back to bed for a bit. We’ll try later... Cry it out if you need to. I’ve got you.”
Probably sounds bonkers to some people but it's the only reason I’m still alive.
My support network is wonderful and they do so much to keep me going, but it wasn't until I allowed myself to feel my emotions and self soothe through them that things got better.
I can’t change what has been done to me. I can’t change the dynamic nature of my disabilities or the fact that parts of my body will continue to break down. But I can accept myself and say, this is the way things are: react accordingly for our continued survival.
Radical acceptance isn’t about approval or giving up. It's a stress tolerance skill that lets you look at some of the worst parts of your life and go “fuck this sucks. Okay, how do I make this suck less?” and then following through on it.
It's a skill that takes a long time to build. But it's well worth investing in.
3K notes · View notes
slowbison · 10 months
Note
Could you write reader Fucking Miguel and leaving him full of cum and desperate while having a cage on getting so desperate and needy and then making him go to meetings and patrols
And could it be villain reader
a/n: your mind is yummyyyy, never thought of villain reader. well i kinda did, but ur's activated a deep part of my brain that was like yeahh this one. anyway, hope ya like :]
Bottom! Miguel O'Hara x Villain! Male Reader
words: 2.6k
warnings: humiliation, anal sex, butt plug, chastity device (cock cage), smut
“We really should go out on a date sometime, hm?” You said, rolling your hips with a particularly sharp thrust into the trembling man. The man was bent over a desk, claws gripping the desk and kept spewing out broken cries as you fucked him.
“Please let me cum, I-I can’t take it anymore.. please!” He begged, wailing as you continued to rock in him.
Your eyes darkened and grabbed the back of his head, rubbing his head into the desk. “I warned you Spidey not to be late or I’ll blow up everyone in that damned bank,” You leaned down, snarling in his ear and picked up the pace, fucking him harder into the desk.
Miguel arched his back and a silent cry escaped his mouth, clenching around your cock harder. He could feel his eyes roll to the back of his head as you continued your relentless pace, digging your hand into his head and hips. You groaned at the feeling of his tight ass, sucking you in deeper. “Haha, it’s a good thing that Nueva’s number one whore will do anything to protect them, right darling?”
Shame and arousal coursed within Miguel as you reminded the man how he got to this predicament.
It had been another night of patrolling Nueva York, he was alone this time around which meant his pace of dealing with criminals slowed. During one of his fights, he forgot the arrangement made between you and him on meeting at a specific location. He only realized after the fight, hearing a loud explosion in the distance that you were upset at his delayed arrival. Making his way as fast as he could, he found you standing at the top of a bank, detonator in hand. Spider-Man knew that only the left side of the bank that had no civilian’s was blown and he revealed himself, carefully walking closer to you and the tied up woman at his feet.
“Oh! Spider-Man, so good of you to finally join us,” You sneered at him, stepping over the hostage under your foot.
“V/n, let the girl go. It’s me that you want, not her.”
You huffed at the man and picked up the woman off the floor by her hair, shoving the detonator in her face. She cried harder and screamed every time the button was slightly pressed up against her cheek, desperately staring at the hero. “Unfortunately, I’m not interested in pets that refuse orders” You spoke plainly, moving your hand to the woman’s face, gripping it in your palm. “Maybe I should take this one and train it properly, hm? She’d make a fine slut don’t you think?” You purred, wiping the woman’s tears away with your thumb as she cried harder.
Miguel was about to take another step before you angrily jabbed the detonator in his direction.
“One more fucking step and everyone blows up right now, stay back.” You hissed, the woman began to tremble more and pleaded to be let go. “Look what you’ve done Spidey! The poor lamb is so scared”
“You can do anything you want with me, just let her go V/n.”
“Anything?” You mused.
“Heh, fine then. Catch,” You laughed, shoving the detonator in the woman's mouth and throwing her off the building. Miguel jumped to save her, wrapping his arms around her and landed on the floor. Taking the device out of her mouth, quickly disarming it before looking back up, only to find you had disappeared.
Gritting his teeth, Miguel went to chase after you, leaving the woman and the police force to handle the rest of the situation. He caught up to you, jumping from rooftops and hovering cars before slipping through an alleyway.
Still hot on your tail, Miguel clawed on the walls of the alley, but felt a strong tug on his foot that slammed him into an old abandoned office, a dark snicker coming from above him. Miguel felt his anger rising and began trading blows with you. Punching you square on the face while you kicked at his side, watching as he tumbled into a corner. He growled, claws protruding as he pounced at you once more, blocking his claws with your knife.
The fight continued for some time, both of men bleeding from cuts and bruised from the battle. You had the hero’s chest pinned against the desk and arms clasped in your grip, rutting against his ass, groaning at the feeling. Miguel returning your grinding with his own, stifled a low whine behind his clenched teeth hoping to stop any noises from escaping. You laughed at his attempt to stop himself from giving you the pleasure that he enjoyed your toying.
“Why hide that you’re enjoying this slut? If you give me your ass, I could do much more than just this, darling” You cooed, giving him a particular strong thrust, a small whine slipping past his lips.
“Or should I disable it for you?”
Miguel craned his neck to look at you and tensed, before the pixels covering his ass dissipated, revealing that he had nothing on underneath. You grinned, slithering your hand from his arms to grab a handful of his cheeks. “Not even wearing anything decent underneath, you really love to give easy access to anyone that promises to fuck you” You said, kneading the mound in your hands then slapping it, repeating the action a few more times. Each slap eliciting a small groan or moan that got progressively louder as you hit harder.
“Don’t mind if I do then, doll.”
Was all Miguel remembered as for the next few minutes you began your assault on him. Eating and pounding his ass into the hard desks while he tried, but failed to maintain some dignity as if he wasn’t just some shameless whore moaning and begging for one of the city's notorious villains. Leading to the current situation where he’s been begging to cum after you’ve denied his requests multiple times, citing that he should just be a good whore and take what he gets.
Your breath hitched as you mercilessly pounded into him, soon to reach your own pleasure. Miguel let out a wanton cry as his vision turned white, body trembling, trying to contain his desire to cum all over the desk. The sight of how the man squirms underneath you spurs you on, balls tighten as you fucked into him as roughly as you could.
Miguel begging slurred as he barely managed any coherent word. Leading to the quivering man’s orgasm wrenched from him with a drawled moan, spilling all over the desk with some dripping to the floor. Realizing that he failed to adhere to your command, he clenched around your shaft in hopes for your forgiveness.
You grit your teeth at the action and thrusted harder, slamming into the man continuously then stilled as your cum coated his walls. Letting out a deep groan as emptied inside, determined to fill him full. Miguel pitifully whined at the feeling, even more so when you left. You returned with a plug in your hand and eased it into him, hearing him softly groan at the intrusion.
Miguel began to catch his breath, loosening his grip on the desk now that he no longer needed to hold on for life at the force of your thrusts.
“Oh don’t relax just yet doll, we’re not done here” You grinned, flipping him on his back. Miguel didn’t put up a fight as you manhandled him, only getting curious when he felt cold metal encase his flaccid cock.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Miguel hissed at the cold feeling, lifting his body off the desk to get a better look.
“I’ve decided to extend our little session together Spidey, extending your punishment” You muttered, adjusting the chastity device around his cock, a pleased hum as it fit perfectly. The man grabbed your other hand that held the key and met his gaze.
“I have no use for a pet that doesn’t listen to orders, much less one that disobeys” You stated, grabbing the man’s face. His mask hid his expression, but you could feel his conviction from your words. Releasing your hand from his grasp and over his caged dick, aligning the key at the top with the lock. “So then, will you accept your punishment and wait for orders or do I have to use extreme measures?” You spoke lowly, bored eyes staring into the hero.
Miguel bit his lip in thought, “If I wear that, don’t terrorize the city for the week, promise that.”
“Trying to set demands with me? You really need to know your place” You tutted, giving him a sly smile before continuing, “Fine, since you’re the best free slut in this city.” You chuckled darkly and slipped the key into the lock, pocketing the key.
“Clean yourself up, your little spider friends should be arriving soon. Be good until then, pet.” You warned, escaping through a door, leaving the man to make himself presentable before he could be caught. Just as he was about finished, the wall busted open as the Scarlet Spider and Spider Woman arrived.
“That was a perfect dramatic entrance, now where’s the V/n.  I’ll trap him with my amazing biceps, maybe get some work in with my quads, while you back me up.” Ben rasped, flexing his arms and scanned around the room.
“He got away,” Miguel snapped, turning to leave, a slight limp noticeable as he walked.
“You alright there? Seems like he had you good if you're walking like that” Jess asked, watching as the man tensed and straightened his back. “You can ride with me if you want.”
“No thanks, I’m fine. Let’s just get back to HQ and finish up the meeting for today” Miguel said, jumping out of the wall. He groaned as he could feel the plug nested so deeply inside and grit his teeth to stop himself from moaning.
Ben huffed, upset that there wasn’t going to be any action and followed behind, Jess riding along besides him.
Once at headquarters, Miguel could barely think straight as he desperately tried not to think about how full he felt with your cum still warm. He bit the inside of his cheek, not wanting to let out a needy whine in front of everyone. Worse when he felt his dick twitching at the thought yet was confined in its cage. It served to remind him of how he was under your mercy and only you could decide to give him relief. Miguel pinched the bridge of his nose, helplessly trying to will his boner away while a gentle hand was placed on his shoulder.
“You alright Miguel? If it’s about V/n, we’re sure to catch him next time buddy.” Peter softly spoke, Mayday tilting her head at the anguished expression on his face. Not wanting to draw more attention to himself, he calmly stated to the father, “I’m fine Peter, I’ll handle it on my own.”
Peter wanted to say more, but Miguel stood and walked to the front of the office to give an overview of the current state of the multiverse. He had hoped it would distract him from any thoughts surrounding V/n and how he wanted nothing more than to track down the man, kneeling at his feet.
The sentiment continued as he returned back to the city on patrol, hoping to find the villain as he could feel his cock stirred in its cage. He wasn’t alone this time and was joined by the Spectacular Spider-Man much to his chagrin. They had heard a man’s terrified screams that led them to a group of thugs giving him a beat down.
Miguel and the young Peter Parker had assumed that it would be a relatively simple job as they were just average thugs. But as the fight continued with only two down and three more to go, they realized they were much tougher than anticipated. Still, nothing they can’t handle. Then they heard a deep, menacingly laugh coming from above, one that Miguel knew all too well.
“V/n!” Miguel and Peter yelled. Watching the man smile and bowed to greet his audience.
“Pleasure to be of service, though I’m only interested in one of you spiders yelling my name.” You purred, eyes locking onto Miguel’s, even if you couldn’t see his eyes.
“Boss! Don’t worry about these guys, I’ll take care of them” Peter said as he threw one of the henchmen into the wall. “You chase after him! I’ll take care of the guy who's hurt too.”
Miguel nodded and crawled up to the roof, chasing after the man once more. A mixture of anger that his heroic side wanted to capture you and put you in prison where you belong, but an overwhelming desire to continue where they left off.
He watched as you turned the corner and slipped into an opened window. Carefully coming up to the small entrance, he squeezed in and stood inside the apartment. There was rustling coming from a door down the hall and silently crept towards the noise. Peering into the door was V/n lighting a candle with a match and flicking the dead stick into a corner, a pleasant aroma filling the air.
“It’s good that it’s just you here, I’d hate for us to be rudely interrupted” You said, turning the lamp on the dresser on before sitting on the chair across from the bed. Miguel disabled his location and sent a quick message to young Peter not to worry about him. He was about to walk into the room when you shook your head, tutting your lips at him.
“Crawl,” You demanded.
Miguel was apprehensive about doing such a degrading act, but with his cock starting to beg for the man’s attention, the pain and arousal of being trapped in a cage swept over him. You pat your thigh as he slowly get's down on his hands and knees, crawling to you. He felt so humiliated even if there was no one around, making him clench around the plug.
Once he was nestled between your legs, you murmured a gentle “Good boy” and softly petted his head, as if he was your loving pet, a dog begging for attention. Clasping your hand at the back of his head, you shoved his face into your dick bulging in your pants. Miguel felt part of his anger reignite, wanting to curse you out in Spanish, but his body betrayed him and a low whine emerged from his throat.
Pixels dissipated from his mask, allowing only his mouth available and began to mouth at your cock, hoping to please you. It only fueled his embarrassment and shame as he kept letting out needy moans, acting like some cheap whore for a man who should be put behind bars.
You chuckled at his pathetic state and watched as the man who denied that he enjoys being treated as such, didn’t even realize he began to hump your leg. Moving his head away, you unbuckle your belt and pull your cock free from his restraints, something the man longed for as well.
“C’mon then” you paused, watching Miguel look up at you. Behind the mask covering his eyes, you could feel his lustful gaze through it and grinned, licking your lips.
“Get back to work, whore.”
You were going to have fun breaking him.
a/n: not all that sure if anyone would be exactly interested, but part of V/n was inspired by the Joker. but like fanfiction joker, if that makes sense which prolly doesn’t. the types where he’s like crazy but like doing just enough to keep the villain title going so Batman keeps going for him. well at least from the ones I’ve read, heheh.
up next: reader request! leon s kennedy x top male reader. leon and reader, top of the academy students and fierce rivals. must learn to work together to rescue ashley from the insane cult. god bless her soul if she's got to deal with those angry horny dogs.
3K notes · View notes
saerins · 10 months
Text
𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒐
Tumblr media
+ itoshi sae x f!reader | wc 2.1k | content: fluff, slight angst, hurt/comfort, mentions of jealousy/insecurities
notes: of course when i’m back i write for sae … who else is possible of holding me hostage like this ? :’)
summary: he’s stupid and stubborn and bad at being a boyfriend. you make him want to be better though. always.
Tumblr media
itoshi sae has a bad habit.
he’s not used to relationships, or the notion of having to care for someone in a certain romantic way that tests his own boundaries. this much is apparent in the way he’s only ever had one relationship before you and it was over before he started, because he’d chosen career over his ex.
and no, the situation right now with you isn’t like that. even so, it’s tough; when you feel down for no particular reason and sae doesn’t know how to handle it. and sometimes he’s tired too and you catch him at the wrong timing and you both end up sulking the entire night.
you won’t lie—you have a bad habit too. you can’t really bring yourself to express exactly how you feel. it’s difficult to open up just like that, especially when you aren’t used to it. but sae’s especially confused with how to handle these situations, like right now.
right now; when you’re sobbing in front of him and he’s feeling frustrated. when you can’t really handle the heat well—he’s a world-renowned soccer player, one of the world eleven. and next to him, no one even knows you. not when you have a non-disclosure agreement and have to keep everything super private.
it’s funny how you thought it’d be simple. then again, you didn’t factor in all the external disturbances. it tests your patience whenever sae makes the headlines when he’s out for a simple lunch with friends and makes it to the front page with a dating rumor with a top model. it’s tough for you to hold it in when you see people shipping him with someone you can only wish to be.
insecurity just hits you sometimes.
“is it really that hard to just assure me, sae?”
that includes now, when you’ve just had a shitty day and he’s so so tired from all the events he’s had to go to now, having to parade around with that top model, all to promote a brand’s upcoming fragrance line. emotions run high, neither of you have the capacity to deal with this right now.
“look, i’m so fucking tired, can we just deal with this in the morning?”
some pessimistic part of you is telling you he’ll just brush it off in the morning—all the jealousy, the frustration. you don’t even think you can last staying mad at him for that long.
“what’s the problem with talking about it now?”
“i don’t want to talk about it now, could you just let it go for the night?”
both of your voices get higher and higher, just a hair’s breadth away from actual shouting. that’s when sae reels himself in, averting his gaze.
and there goes sae’s bad habit; grabbing his keys and walking out of your shared apartment, no umbrella even though it’s raining outside and he’ll get soaked just trying to walk to the car.
you can’t find it in yourself to tell him to stay safe because you’re all out of energy tonight. everything has been sucked dry into your anxiety, and you’re spent. now what can you even do besides curl up on the couch, wondering if you’re too much?
when your phone lights up, you catch the wallpaper—a picture of sae looking off camera while he presses a kiss on your head.
it just makes you feel worse.
Tumblr media
he’s tired. his efforts are spent. on soccer, not you. but still. it’s exhausting. couldn’t you have just waited for a few more fucking hours?
he’s tired. so fucking tired.
“hey.”
it’s a lame greeting, but that’s all he can manage right now. shidou’s in his doorway, a cock in his brow and a very annoyed look on his face.
“oi, i got a girl here—”
“don’t care, i’ll just crash on the couch,” sae cuts him off, trudging through the door and settling himself on the leather black couch, the familiarity sinking in. he used to live here with shidou before he got together with you after all.
shidou mumbles something like suit yourself before he leaves his old roommate be, mulling over the remains of his relationship with you.
sae opens his phone, the picture of you at the beach that he snapped glaring at him in this dim light. he swallows the lump in his throat—he doesn’t know how to feel. part of him knows that you feel like shit each time he does this; you’ve made it known over at least three different occasions now. but his head’s throbbing way too much and his muscles are way too sore and all he really wanted was just to come home to you, to the peacefulness he always loves.
is he really the asshole here?
a notification pops up on his phone an hour later. sae’s first train of thought is to wonder if it’s you. but it’s nothing important. it’s just oliver going over the next training’s details. the same old thing. but then sae looks up at the date and he curses inwardly.
it’s your second year anniversary. two years since you’d dated this fickle, troublesome guy.
sae’s head ducks between his palms, elbows resting on his thighs, as he considers the weight of his words.
this morning he woke up without even so much as a greeting for you; all he knew was he’d be late for practice if he didn’t leave in exactly five minutes. he’d rushed out the door and only responded to your morning greeting with a grunt. sae didn’t spare you any time for the rest of the day either, when you’d attempted to ask him out for dinner. he left you on read before ultimately tossing his phone to the side. when he came back home you’d given him a kiss and he barely reacted, too tired to give you anything even when you showed him the big dinner spread you’d cooked.
now he’s here—in an apartment at the other end of the city that’s no longer his while he left you alone in your shared apartment, leaving the argument unresolved and letting you stew in your own thoughts.
sae lets the time fly right by, staring at the ceiling while he contemplates everything. but the answer is plain and simple to him: you.
he’s tired and he’s hopelessly invested in soccer and he shouldn’t have time for anything else in his life but he wants you. he doesn’t know nearly half the right things to do in whatever situations, but the thought that he could really possibly lose you this time is enough to overwhelm him—sae grabs his car keys and leaves just as shidou and his girl leaves the room.
“oi, made up already?” he shouts after him through his front door.
sae rolls his eyes and ignores him; all he needed was some time to himself anyway. he’s glad shidou wasn’t there to poison his head with anything (or more like, he wasn’t there to convince him to drink his guts off).
Tumblr media
ten minutes later he’s in his car and speeding back to the apartment, back to you. because no, it’s not too hard for him to assure you—it’s what he should have done. just because he’s used to being the center of dating rumours doesn’t mean you are. just because he knows it’s nothing doesn’t mean you don’t get insecure because of them.
after all, he remembers what he told you that night he asked you to be his. that he’ll make sure you’re happy. being happy all the time isn’t realistic, but at the very least, sae should’ve known better than to keep leaving you alone with your thoughts.
he speeds through the familiar city roads, however fast he’s going just doesn’t seem fast enough. but he still makes it safely back to your shared apartment within twenty minutes, and hopefully still fast enough to make sure you’re not completely disappointed in him.
it’s still raining and the living room lights are still on and he can faintly make out where you’re pacing the room through the blinds. sae feels like a creep staring at you from his car, but his heart’s pounding loudly in his ears and he can’t help but think he’s seen that sleek black car parked next to his somewhere before.
keys out the ignition, rain pattering lightly on his head, he gets out only to meet who he knows has been there for you since day one.
“done running already?” the hostility of your best friend irks him, but he can’t say he didn’t earn it. “that’s faster than i thought.”
“reo.”
your visitor rakes his hand through his purple hair, sighing and rolling his eyes. thanks to sae’s busy schedule, he hasn’t really had time to hang out with any of your friends, and probably hence their usual animosity towards him. though, well, nagi seems to be more indifferent than anything.
“if you’re here to break up with her, don’t worry, i’ll take care of her,” reo tells him, an air of indifference surrounding him. three guesses who you go to whenever you feel upset about your relationship.
sae clenches his fists, reminding himself that reo’s your best friend and punching him would do more harm than good. “i won’t,” is all sae says before he pushes past him, already done with whatever this conversation is.
reo scoffs, “for a guy who loves her, you do a shit job of showing it.”
and although sae shuts the lobby doors right after, reo’s words stay ingrained in his head. it’s not like sae doesn’t know it, but fuck if he knows what to do about it. but when he opens the front door and is greeted by the sight of your red puffy eyes, he forgets everything. forgets the frustration and the anger and the stupid excuses in his head—they’re all secondary when it comes to you anyway.
his feet take him straight to you, pulling you against his chest and holding you tight.
“i’m sorry,” he says, and that’s the easiest it’s ever come out.
from your lack of response, sae finds himself hoping for the best, hoping that he didn’t just lose you because of his stupid impulses. but then he feels your arms wrap around his waist and he hears himself breathing a sigh of relief.
“you’re an ass, you know that?” you sniffle, and it’s kind of hard to breathe when he’s pressing against you that much but you’re more relieved than anything that you don’t really care.
sae chuckles, weakly, the tension leaving his shoulders. “i know.” he can feel you pouting without even having to look at you.
“i should really leave you,” you whine, though your actions betray your words, holding him even tighter.
“then why do you put up with me?” it’s a funny thing, how he can be afraid to lose you yet he can tell that you’re not someone who gives up so easily.
that’s exactly why he has to prove that you didn’t choose the wrong person to be with.
“i guess i’m just stupid too.”
you’re not. sae’s going to make sure no one else thinks you’re stupid for staying with him. it’s enough having your best friend think that, but that’s fine, sae’ll prove him wrong soon enough. it sucks that he’s only good for soccer, but at the rate you’re going? you’ll teach him how to be a good boyfriend. he’s two years in and learning slowly but he’ll get there.
you’re the only one who can get him there.
“no,” sae says, all of a sudden, and you pull away, confused.
“no what?”
“what you asked earlier… it isn’t too hard. i’ll work on it.”
oh, must be right before he left, when you’d asked if it was hard for him to just assure you sometimes. to be honest, you didn’t think he’d even listened. but sae is sae and he’s stubborn and stupid and a little bit of an ass, but he still listens to everything you say.
you try not to break out into a smile—you don’t want to show him how whipped you really are. “i’ll hold you to your word, then.”
sae smiles, ruffling the top of your head before slowly pulling you in again. “so… don’t leave me, okay?”
it sinks in what he’s saying. you didn’t think you’d ever hear sae say those kinds of words. but it’s unfair, really, because how can you say no when he’s like this?
“you already know i won’t.”
and somehow, you’re right. sae knows you won’t. doesn’t mean he’ll get caught lacking though.
“good then.”
because he plans on keeping you forever.
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
heavenlybey · 9 months
Text
a/n hi y’all this is my first time writing so pls keep that in mind.. also if you have some tips or feedback i would appreciate it!!
Remind you
⚠️Smut
Connie was getting sick of your nasty attitude. you’ve been ignoring his texts and calls for a while now and it was getting on his nerves. But posting that quote that said: “if he ain’t treat you right, his opp might” followed with a picture of you cuddled up with another dude? And not just any dude..Jean??? “She’s got me fucked up” connie mumbled to himself while putting his shoes on. He was done with your attitude and he was going to fix things tonight!
You on the other hand, didn’t have a care in the world. You had just gotten out of your relaxing bath, ready to end the night with a glass of wine and watching your fav show. That was until you heard three hard knocks on your door. “who the hell?” you thought to yourself as you went to go open the door and were met with a very angry Connie. As soon as you saw him you rolled your eyes and tried to close the door. Not wanting to deal with his shit and just go finish the rest of your wine. But Connie was faster and put this foot between the door, he fully opened the door and let himself inside. “Get the fuck out of my house, Connie” you angrily said to him. “Jean huh?” “Get out of my house!” Connie found it amusing how YOU were the one that’s angry while he should’ve been the one who was angry.
“no, we’re gonna talk about this. You’ve been ignoring me for weeks and now you’re posting pics with another man, you think imma let this shit slide ma?”
“You never make time for me anymore and, i can’t do this shit anymore. I’m don-“
Oh you got him fucked up. His lips coming down to yours in a hungry kiss. Tongue swiping across your parted lips. Pressing his erection against you. A moan wanting to escape from the feeling of his growing erection against yours. Trying to push him away, he kept a firm grip around your neck. “i’m serious, i’m done witcho bitchass” you said which resulted into you being thrown onto your bed. Connie dragging you back, ripping your black silky robe off. You’re fully naked laying before him, sending a hard slap on your ass, a gasp fell from your lips.
“I don’t care what you say, we’re not done mama”
He flips you onto your back without any type of warning, forcing your knees up against your shoulders. You are completely spread out for him, running his eyes over your wet pussy. When he looks back up to you, you know because of the look on his face, your shit is about the be fucked up.
Connie is mad as hell, he doesn’t bother with any sweet touches. Going straight between your legs to suck on your clit. You let out a gasp saying “ohh god!” His tongue meeting your entrance to thrust inside of you. He leans up to make eye contact with you while he spit right on your pussy. You both watch the spit slowly rolling downwards, towards your entrance. His long tongue came down to glide from your entrance to your clit then sucking on your bud. “F-Fuck-“ is all you could say, feeling him chuckle while he was sucking up your arousal. Filling his mouth full of your wetness. “You think Jean can make you feel this good mami?” You were already feeling the tight knot in your stomach, you knew your orgasm was only a few licks away and so did Connie. Your lips fell open once again to moan, but before you could get anything out, he shoved his fingers in your mouth.
“Suck. Get them nice and wet for me, ma.” You took his deep into your throat, sucking and swirling like you would his dick. The pleased look on his face pissed you off. You decided, without much thinking about the consequences to open your big mouth and say something stupid.
“This is how i sucked off Jean yesterday.” You said with a smug look. The smug look on your face was wiped away immediately when Connie flips you onto your stomach, your face hitting the bed first before he spreads your legs wide open with his hands at your ankles. “Talking about another dude while i’m in between your legs, are you crazy or sum??” Your back arched deep, just the way you knew he liked it. His big hand gripping yours to keep you from running. A deep moan leaves both of you as he brutally enters your pussy. His dick settling inside you while he splits you apart and makes room for himself without giving you a chance to adjust. It’s hard to breathe with his dick so deep inside you, the only thing you can do is whine and moan. His thrust deepened as you were trying your best to push him away. The tapping of your hands on his pelvic area making him look down to where you both connected. “What? You can’t handle it ma? Where is that big mouth of yours now huh?
“Please Connie..it’s too much..i-i can’t.” you cried out. Connie scoffed. “i really don’t fucking care ma. Take this fucking dick. Imma remind you who you’re talking to. Gonna make sure never you forget again.” he said while grabbing the back of your neck to pushing your face into the mattress while he is fucking you. You were a moaning mess. Connie was giving you the deepest strokes, constantly hitting your g-spot without any stopping. You felt the tight knot in you stomach starting to form again as your pussy started to get tighter around Connie’s dick. “Don’t even think about cumming. You gon hold that shit mami.”
2K notes · View notes
en-dazedafterdark · 9 months
Text
meddle about (with me)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
READ PART 1 HERE
PAIRINGS: ex! heeseung x reader x fwb! sunghoon (but this is very very heavily sunghoon focused, heeseung is barely in it lol)
GENRE: smut, porn with plot, angst, attempted fluff
SYNOPSIS: sleeping with your ex is complicated enough without having to deal with your growing feelings for your friends with benefits
WARNINGS: protected sex (for once) but also unprotected sex (stay safe!), oral (m receiving), shower sex, mentions of alcohol and drinking, this switches povs so many times you may get whiplash but i also wanted to get in sunghoon’s head for this one, i still don’t know how to do warnings
WORD COUNT: 11.9k
A/N: likes, reblogs and any interactions are appreciated <3 i’m not super happy with how this turned out cause i overthought it a lot but let me know if you guys like it!
Tumblr media
Sunghoon wasn’t usually the type to be so self destructive. He liked to keep things in perspective, to know when it was time to move on and to know when to take a step back. He always prided himself on being the kind of person that was in control, that could push his feelings aside when he needed to. He always thought he was better than this.
So how the fuck did he end up in this position?
He hadn't meant for it to happen. He knew he should have backed off the moment he had woken up next to you for the first time, knew that it had been a bad idea from the start. You were already dealing with enough and he knew it wasn't right, knew that he shouldn't do this to you.
But then he woke up and your lips were still on his mind. You were still there in his arms, your hair tickling his skin and the scent of your perfume in his nose. You were still so close that he could feel your heart beating next to his, could hear your breath when you let out a small sigh. It made him so fucking happy that he thought he might lose his mind.
He was an idiot. He knew that. He had known this was wrong, known that this would never end well. You were his best friends ex and he had no right to get involved with you. Bro code and all that bullshit.
“You're a fucking idiot Hoon," Sunghoon whispered. He leaned back on his palms, his eyes trained on you as he looked down at your face. Your hair was still messy, your eyes still puffy as you slept. Your lips were parted and your skin was flushed.
He let out a groan, knowing that this had been a terrible idea.
You stirred slightly, making him suck in a deep breath. You moved your head, letting out a small whimper and he bit his lip to keep himself from groaning.
You were so beautiful that it made him ache. 
“Heard you’ve been spending a lot of time with Y/N lately.” Heeseung had said that night at the bar, right before you had sauntered in with your friends as if you were summoned by their words. Heeseung had taken a long drink, his eyes burning into him.
He had laughed, trying to play it off as he could feel Heeseung glaring at him. He knew he couldn't tell him exactly how much time you spent together - or worse, what you did when you did spend time together. 
“Yeah, she and I are friends. Why do you care so much about her anyways? You broke up with her.”
Heeseung shrugged. "Doesn't mean I don't worry about her."
Sunghoon had looked at Heeseung then, his brow furrowing as he tried to understand what was going through his head. He wasn't sure what to make of it, wasn't sure why Heeseung had said it.
"Just be careful with her," Heeseung said, putting his beer down. "She's going through a lot."
Sunghoon had scoffed, shaking his head. "You're telling me that?"
Heeseung's jaw had ticked, but he said nothing more. Sunghoon wasn't stupid. He knew Heeseung well enough to know when something was wrong, knew that there was something in his best friend's mind that he didn't understand.
“Why did you break up with her if you care about her so much? You treated her like shit Heeseung. You left her without so much as a word. What the fuck did she ever do to you?"
"You don't understand-"
"No," Sunghoon interrupted. "I don't."
Heeseung's face had gone dark. "We're done talking about this."
That was when Sunghoon noticed you. You had been with your friends, all of you laughing loudly and sharing drinks with other people. You were so pretty that Sunghoon couldn't take his eyes off you. You wore a skirt, your long legs on full display as you laughed.
Heeseung had looked at him and Sunghoon had seen the jealousy on his face. He had wanted to laugh, knowing how fucked up the situation was.
"She looks good," Sunghoon said, still staring at you. "Doesn't she?"
Heeseung had cleared his throat. "I'm gonna head home."
"So early? Come on, stay."
Heeseung shook his head. "I'm tired."
"You sure you're not just running away from Y/N?"
Heeseung had glared at him. "I'm not running from anything. I'll see you tomorrow."
He had gotten up and left, leaving Sunghoon alone in the bar. Sunghoon took another gulp of his drink, not noticing the way you had disappeared from the bar before Heeseung had left. 
He didn’t know if he regretted following Heeseung out of the bar or not. He had just wanted to talk to him, to understand what the fuck was going on. 
He really was not expecting to see Heeseung with you, to see him kissing you or to hear your quiet moans.
Sunghoon was jealous. It was a strange feeling for him and he wasn't sure he liked it. He had never wanted anyone the way he wanted Heeseung and when he saw him kissing you he knew he had to have you too. So when Heeseung had offered to share you with him - of course he said yes.
He wasn't stupid enough to think this was going to end well. He knew you still had feelings for Heeseung, knew that you still cared for him. He couldn't even begin to imagine how you felt after Heeseung had left you and how fucked up everything had gotten between the three of you.
But fuck, did you feel good.
Sunghoon leaned forward, watching you stir again. You let out a groan, moving your head. He reached out, pushing your hair out of your face. You opened your eyes slowly, blinking up at him as if you didn't know where you were.
"Hi," Sunghoon whispered.
You whimpered, closing your eyes. You took a deep breath before your eyes opened again. You blinked at him, your eyes softening.
"How are you?" he asked.
"Sleepy," you whispered.
Sunghoon smiled. "It's still early."
You turned your head, looking over at the clock. It was only a few minutes after six in the morning. You rolled back onto your back, staring up at him. Sunghoon ran his fingers down your arm, staring at you.
"How do you feel?" he whispered.
You let out a sigh. "Tired. A bit sore."
"Good or bad sore?"
You bit your lip. "Good."
Sunghoon nodded, his lips curling into a smile. "You were really loud last night."
You blushed, covering your face with your hands. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be," he said. "I like it."
"Stop," you whispered.
"I can't help it," he said. "You just sound so good."
"Stop," you whined in embarrassment.
He laughed, pushing your hands away from your face. "It's the truth."
You whined, hiding your face with a pillow. You turned on your side, hiding yourself from him. You were still blushing and Sunghoon was trying his hardest not to smile as he stared at you.
"Do you want me to get you something to eat?" he asked. "I can make you some food if you want. Or do you want me to run you a bath? You can soak for a while and then I'll make you something to eat."
"I don't want to move," you murmured into the pillow.
"Okay," Sunghoon said. "I'll get you some water. Maybe a few Advil for your headache too."
“How did you know I have a headache?”
He leaned down, kissing the back of your neck. He placed another kiss on your shoulder as you shivered.
"Just a guess." moo omg im sorry idk what this was
You pushed your hands into the pillow, trying to get yourself under control. You could feel his lips on your skin, feel the way his fingers were dragging along your spine as he kissed you. He reached the nape of your neck, placing a kiss on your skin.
"What are you doing?" you whispered, pushing back against him.
Sunghoon nipped your earlobe, letting out a quiet groan. "I want to take care of you."
You swallowed hard, closing your eyes. You didn't know what to do, didn't know what to say as he kissed the nape of your neck. You were still exhausted and still in a little bit of pain from last night, but fuck if it didn't make you wet.
"I'm so tired," you said.
"Then I'll stop," he said, placing a kiss on your skin. "I don't want you to think I'm trying to force you into something you don't want."
"You're not."
"I'm not?" He pushed back, letting you roll onto your back. You stared up at him, your eyes wide as he looked down at you.
"I mean..." you licked your lips. "I didn't say I didn't want you."
"But you're tired?"
You nodded. "I feel like I can't keep my eyes open."
“Then let me do everything," he said, leaning down and kissing your forehead. He grabbed your hands, placing a kiss on each palm before he placed them over your head. "I'll take care of you."
You stared up at him, letting him kiss your skin as he did so. You closed your eyes, trying to keep yourself from pushing your hips up as you felt yourself getting wet.
"You're so pretty," he said. "It makes me crazy."
"Hoon-"
"Just let me touch you," he whispered, trailing his lips down your skin.
You bit your lip, nodding. "Okay."
Sunghoon let out a low groan, placing another kiss on the skin of your neck before he placed another on the base of your throat. He continued to trail his lips along your skin, making you squirm as he moved down your chest. You kept your hands where he had put them, moaning quietly when he placed a kiss on your nipples.
"Hoon-"
He smirked, kissing your breasts as he nipped your skin. You groaned, arching your back as he wrapped his mouth around one of your nipples, his fingers circling around the other.
You moaned again, unable to stop yourself as he licked your nipples and squeezed your breasts. You gasped, your hands gripping the sheets tightly as Sunghoon continued to kiss your skin.
You whined, gasping out when he began to kiss your stomach. He kissed you slowly, leaving you panting. He placed his hands on your hips, holding them tightly as he kissed down your bellybutton. You whimpered, watching him as he kissed your hipbones.
"You're so pretty," he murmured. "You're so fucking beautiful."
You bit your lip, letting out a small groan. You covered your face, feeling embarrassed from his compliments.
Sunghoon smirked, leaning back up. You opened your eyes, looking up at him as he grabbed your wrists.
"I want to see your face."
You looked up at him obediently, letting him place kisses on your wrists and your palms. You stared up at him, letting him pull your arms from your face. He placed a kiss on your forehead and then another on your eyelids.
He leaned down, kissing you softly, his lips molding to yours. You kissed him back, moaning quietly as he licked your lips. You parted them, letting his tongue lick yours and you reached up, wrapping your arms around his neck. He moved his hips, grinding his crotch against you as you kissed him. You gasped into his mouth, opening your eyes.
He stared down at you, his eyes dark. "I can stop if you want."
"Don't you dare."
Sunghoon grinned, leaning down and kissing you again. You moaned into his mouth, pushing your hips up against his. You were still sore, but you didn't care.
You let Sunghoon pull your arms over your head, holding you in place as he kissed you. He rolled his hips again, moaning quietly as you kissed him. You could feel his cock, hard in his boxers as he moved on top of you.
"Please-" you whispered, unable to hold back any longer. "I need you."
He groaned, trailing kisses down your neck as he grinded against you. "You'll get me. I'm not going anywhere."
You shook your head, rolling your hips. You wanted more, wanted all of him as you kissed him again. You felt him place his hand between your legs and you spread them, whining as he pressed against your pussy.
You had been wet since you woke up, but he was making it worse. He rubbed his finger against your pussy, letting out a groan. He kissed your neck again, his hips rolling against you as you pushed against him.
You were already so sensitive from last night, but it didn't matter. You were so turned on that you couldn't stand it anymore. You wanted to come, wanted to come so badly that you would probably be able to pass out.
Sunghoon pressed his finger against your clit and you gasped, crying out quietly. You spread your legs wider, wrapping them around his waist as he kept you pinned down.
You rolled your hips, wanting more as you panted. Sunghoon was moving his fingers over you slowly, making you moan out as you moved your hips. You were already so worked up and you felt like you could come any second.
He rubbed a bit harder, making you whine. You were so close, so close that you couldn't stand it anymore. You opened your eyes, looking at him as he stared down at you.
"Stop teasing me," you moaned, clamping down on his fingers with your thighs. "Fuck me, please."
He bit his lip, staring down at you. He let go of your arms, pulling his boxers off. You watched him as he grabbed a condom out of your bedside table. He placed it over his cock, leaning down and kissing you. You opened your mouth, letting him kiss you as he moved against you again. You pushed your hips up, feeling him press against your entrance. You reached up, running your fingers through his hair as he pressed into you.
He groaned, pushing into you slowly. You wrapped your legs around him, gasping as he filled you up. He felt bigger than last night, stretching you out and you were already so worked up that you felt like you could come with a single thrust.
You moaned, feeling him spread you wide. He pulled back, thrusting into you again and you squeezed your eyes shut, gasping. You arched your back, wrapping your arms around him. He kissed your neck, moving slowly and you whimpered as he picked up speed.
He groaned, grinding against you and you opened your eyes, looking up at him. He was staring at you, watching you as he moved. You were so worked up that you couldn't keep your eyes open, your breath hitching in your throat. He squeezed your ass, pushing into you harder and you cried out, digging your nails into his skin.
"You're so good," he murmured, kissing you again. "So tight and so fucking beautiful."
"Oh god-"
Sunghoon let out a moan, burying his face in your neck as you moved your hips up to meet him. He moved his hands up your body, gripping your waist tightly as he thrust into you.
You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him close to you. You rolled your hips along with his, feeling him spread you wider as he moved his hips. You could hear his breath on your neck, feel the way his hair was tickling your face as he groaned.
He felt so good, moving slowly as you moved with him. He grabbed your thigh, moving it to his shoulder. You were completely spread for him now and he leaned down, placing a kiss on your thigh as you moaned.
"So fucking gorgeous," he murmured against your skin.
You clenched around him, feeling him press against your G-spot as he thrust into you. He moved so slowly, his fingers digging into your skin. You felt so close, so close to coming and he knew it too. He kept pressing against that spot, making your thighs shake.
He kissed you, swallowing your moans. You moved your hands down his back, digging your nails into his back as you approached your high. You were so close that you didn't want to move, didn't want to do anything but keep him inside of you.
Sunghoon leaned down, kissing your shoulder as he kept thrusting into you. He was moaning softly into your ear, groaning as you clenched around him. He picked up the pace, moving faster and you cried out, squeezing your eyes shut as he fucked you.
"Come on," he murmured in your ear. "Come for me."
"Hoon-" you whined, biting your lip. You felt the tears spring into your eyes, felt your chest start to tighten. "I'm going to come."
"Good girl," he whispered in your ear. "Do it. I want you to come all over my cock."
"Oh my god," you whispered, covering your face with your hands. His words were enough to push you over the edge. You opened your mouth, crying out as you came all over his cock. You felt him move faster, fucking you through your orgasm.
He groaned, thrusting into you a few more times before he stilled inside of you. You let out a quiet whimper, letting him take your arms off his back and move you into his arms. He held you close, kissing your face and neck as you came down from your high. You wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in his neck as he placed a kiss on your head.
You slowly untangled your legs from around him, whining as you felt his cock slide out of you. Sunghoon pressed a kiss on your cheek, letting go of your waist and you slowly opened your eyes, looking up at him.
He was smiling down at you and you could feel your face start to burn.
"What?" you whispered.
"Nothing," he said.
You frowned at him, watching as he pulled the condom off and threw it into the waste bin. You sat up slowly, feeling your body ache as you did so. You bit your lip, watching him as he grabbed some tissues to clean himself off.
You leaned back on your elbows, watching him. You wanted to say something, wanted to ask him why he had been smiling, but you couldn't find the words.
You didn't know what you were feeling right now.
You felt good, of course. You had just had sex with someone and it had been amazing. But there was still this tight feeling in your chest that you didn't understand.
A feeling of guilt, maybe.
You had told yourself that you would be okay with this, that this was all just no strings attached. But as you stared at Sunghoon, as you looked at his smile as he leaned down and kissed you, you knew you were wrong.
The lines between no strings attached and real strings attached were blurrier than you thought.
"I think you should leave."
Sunghoon looked up, his smile slipping off his face. "What?"
"I think you should go," you said. You pulled the blanket up higher, looking away from him.
"What?" Sunghoon repeated.
"I'm tired," you said. "I just want to sleep now."
Sunghoon watched you for a moment, before he let out a sigh. "Okay."
He pulled on some clothes, staring at you as you lay in bed. He grabbed his keys, his wallet, and his phone before he left, closing the door behind him. You let out a shaky breath, rolling over onto your back.
This was for the better. Waking up together, showering together, eating together… that wasn’t what you both had signed up for. What you wanted wasn’t a relationship. What you wanted was a distraction.
That was it.
Tumblr media
It became easy to pretend that what had happened between the three of you never happened. It was like Heeseung had never come back into your life at all. 
For days afterwards you had waited for a text, a call, anything to come from Heeseung but nothing ever came. There was no explanation, no apology, nothing.
You should have been angry. You should have been furious. Instead, you felt sad. You didn't know why you were sad, but you felt so empty. You were trying to go about your day to day business, trying to convince yourself that everything was fine when you knew it wasn't.
Sunghoon avoided the topic as well. You were both trying to pretend that nothing had happened, but you knew that Sunghoon was lying when he said it was okay. He wasn't okay, and neither were you.
It was obvious to you that Sunghoon’s feelings had started to change. 
What was just casual sex became more as he asked you to hang out with him more. He always had something to do with you, whether it was just hanging out in his room or going to the store for some ice cream. He was always touching you, whether it be a hand on the back or a kiss on the cheek.
He even started to sleep over more. You had both agreed to sleep with each other whenever you wanted to, and at first you thought that was what it was, but you soon found out that Sunghoon started to spend the night more often than not.
He would text you good morning and good night. He would ask you if he could see you the next day and you would tell him that you couldn't because you were busy. You knew he knew you were lying.
You were scared. You knew that sooner or later you were going to have to address the fact that he was starting to have feelings for you, and you knew you couldn't handle it. You didn't want to hurt him or yourself, so you kept it bottled up.
So you dealt with it by pushing him away. 
“What are you doing this weekend?"
"Nothing."
"Wanna come to my place? We can watch a movie or something?"
"I can't."
It was always the same answers. You knew that Sunghoon didn't believe that you were busy when in reality, you were just too scared to see him. He seemed hurt, but he never said anything about it. You were thankful for that, but at the same time you hated yourself for pushing him away.
It didn’t really help that your first instinct whenever you were drunk or lonely (or both at the same time, more often than not) was to text Sunghoon.
And Sunghoon was there for you every time.
He came running whenever you called, eager to hold you and kiss you and please you in any way that he could. You hated yourself for being so desperate for attention that you would go to him over and over again, and he always accepted you.
It wasn't enough for you.
You needed to forget about Heeseung. Sunghoon was the next best thing.
The only problem with this was that Sunghoon was also a distraction for you. Every time you were alone, you could feel your thoughts drift to him. It made it hard for you to concentrate on anything else when you knew he was around.
It had gotten so bad that you couldn't go a day without seeing Sunghoon, and it was driving you insane.
You thought you were over it. You thought that you once you were able to forget about Heeseung and his smile and his perfect hair and his perfect lips and his perfect hands and his perfect body and-
You took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of your nose as you leaned against the wall. You had been home for two hours now and you couldn't stand being there any longer. You were too anxious.
So you did what you always did: called Sunghoon.
He picked up right away. "Hey. What's up?"
"I want to come over."
"Right now?"
"Yeah."
"Okay," he said, sounding confused. "Give me ten minutes and I'll come get you."
"Thanks."
You hung up the phone, leaning against the wall again. You ran your hands down your face, closing your eyes. You took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down before you went to your room and changed.
You got out your keys, holding onto them as you waited for Sunghoon to pick you up. He knocked on the door ten minutes later. You opened it, stepping outside and he gave you a smile.
"I'll drive," he said.
You didn't argue. You got into his car, letting him pull away from the curb.
"What's the rush?" he asked. "You were really urgent over the phone."
You hesitated. "I just didn't want to stay home any longer."
He didn't say anything else. He just looked at you, his eyes scanning your face as you watched the road.
"Are you okay?" he asked quietly.
You swallowed, nodding your head. "Yeah. Just tired."
He seemed to accept this, and you both fell silent. The ride back to his apartment was the same as usual. He reached over and put his hand on your knee, rubbing his thumb over the skin as he drove. He didn't say anything when you placed your hand on his and squeezed, letting out a quiet sigh as you did so.
You felt better, but at the same time you felt guilty.
You shouldn't be here with Sunghoon. You shouldn't be with him because you knew you were going to break his heart.
But you couldn't stay at home, and you had nowhere else to go.
He parked his car in the driveway, getting out and opening your door. He held his hand out for you, and you placed your hand in his. He walked you up to his apartment, unlocking the door and opening it for you.
Sunghoon closed it behind you, looking down at you. "You want anything to eat or drink?"
You shook your head. "No, I'm good."
Sunghoon nodded. He turned to you, opening his arms in invitation and you moved as if on autopilot. You wrapped your arms around him, closing your eyes and just breathing him in.
You stayed like that for a while, just holding each other as you stood in the doorway. You could hear the sound of the television in the background, but it wasn't too loud. It was quiet, and Sunghoon's arms were so warm.
He was always so warm.
You pulled away after a while, smiling up at him.
"Come on," he said, grabbing your hand. "I'll put on a movie."
You sat down on the couch as Sunghoon sat down beside you. He handed you the remote as he opened a beer, putting his feet up on the table. You picked something to watch, watching him as he sipped his beer.
He caught you looking at him and he smiled, raising an eyebrow. "What?"
"Nothing," you said, shaking your head. "I was just thinking."
"Thinking about what?"
You opened your mouth to answer, but nothing came out. What were you supposed to say? That you were thinking about him and how he was always so sweet and kind and patient with you? You felt like that was crossing a line.
"I was just thinking that I like this," you said, gesturing to the TV. "I like hanging out with you."
"Me too," Sunghoon said, looking at you. “We haven’t really done this very often lately."
You felt guilt rise up in your chest. You couldn't remember the last time you had come over here.
"I've just been really busy," you said, avoiding his gaze. 
“But not too busy for sex huh?” he said, shaking his head. He reached down, pulling up your leg so he could rub his hands up and down your thigh.
You winced. You knew he wasn't mad, but he did sound hurt. You reached forward and took his hand, moving it so he was holding your hand. You linked your fingers with his, squeezing it.
"I'm sorry," you whispered, looking up at him. "I'm being selfish."
Sunghoon shook his head, squeezing your hand back. "It's fine."
"I'm sorry," you repeated, squeezing his hand again.
He let out a sigh, dropping his head down so it was resting on yours. "What are you sorry about?"
"I don't know," you said, watching your fingers intertwined with his. "I'm sorry about all the times that I'm rude to you."
"You're not rude," he said, and he lifted his head up, leaning forward and kissing your forehead. He pulled away, pressing a kiss to your nose and then your cheek before he kissed your lips.
You kissed him back, letting go of his hand as you moved closer to him. He wrapped an arm around you, kissing you deeper. He licked into your mouth, sighing against your lips as you put your hand on his chest, feeling the thump of his heart against your palm.
He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as you slid your hand up to cup the side of his neck.
"I should stop doing this," you whispered, opening your eyes.
He opened his eyes as well, tilting his head so he was looking at you.
"Doing what?"
You opened your mouth, before closing it. "Kissing you."
"Why?"
"Because it's not fair to you."
"It doesn't feel fair that you only want to kiss me when you're drunk or lonely or upset," he said.
You couldn't say anything. He was right. You leaned forward, resting your face in the crook of his neck. You felt Sunghoon's arms wrap around you, pulling you onto his lap.
“But you always come back to me," he whispered, rubbing your back. "That means something, doesn't it?"
"No strings attached," you said quietly.
"Is that all it was?" he asked. "Nothing more than you just using me to forget about him?"
You lifted your head up, looking at him. "I- I-"
You didn't know what you were going to say. You couldn't tell him that he was right and you had only used him as a way to get over Heeseung because you knew he wouldn't want to hear that.
He seemed to understand that, anyway.
"Look, it's fine," he said. He dropped his hand down your back, squeezing your ass. "You can use me however you need."
You swallowed, trying to calm down your breathing. He was still holding you tightly, but his expression had softened. You bit your lip, leaning forward and kissing his neck.
Sunghoon let out a groan, and he ran his hands up your back. He cupped your face, kissing you and you moved your hips, grinding down on his lap. He groaned again, opening his mouth as your tongues slid against each other.
You pulled away from him, sitting back. You moved so your knees were on either side of his thighs, pushing him back so he was lying down.
He put his hands on your hips, watching as you slid off the couch. You stepped towards him on your knees, undoing his belt as he looked up at you. You pushed his jeans down to his ankles before you stopped, kneeling down and pulling them off his feet. He watched you the entire time, lifting his legs up and kicking his jeans away as you did so.
You stared up at him, your eyes roaming down his body. You placed your hand on his thigh, squeezing the flesh between your fingers as you licked your lips. You could see the outline of his dick in his underwear, and it was already so hard.
You slid your hand up, moving closer to him as you stared into his eyes. You looked down, watching as you rubbed him over his underwear. His dick twitched, and Sunghoon let out a breath.
"Can I blow you?"
"Fuck," Sunghoon groaned, throwing his head back as he tangled his hand in your hair. "Yeah. You don’t have to ask me that.”
You smiled, sliding your hand down his underwear. You pulled out his dick, looking up at him again. You licked your lips, before you leaned forward, licking the tip of his dick. You sucked the tip into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it.
You heard him groan, and you slid him deeper into your mouth. He wasn't huge, but he wasn't small either. You ran your tongue along the underside as you slowly moved your head, letting your saliva drip down his dick. You could feel the veins against your tongue as you slid him out, opening your mouth wide so you could suck him in.
You bobbed your head on his dick, moving your head faster as you started to feel it throb in your mouth. You moaned around him, letting your saliva drip onto his balls. You looked up at him through your lashes and he bit back a loud groan at the sight. He put his hands back in your hair, tugging it back gently.
"You're so good," he breathed out, thrusting his hips upwards. You choked around him but you didn’t back down. You took him deeper, letting him fuck into your mouth.
He moaned as he looked down at you, letting his eyes rake over your body. "You look so fucking pretty like that."
You moaned in response, squeezing his thighs. He let out another loud groan as his dick twitched in your mouth.
You moved your head faster, looking up at him as you sucked his dick. He groaned, moving his hands to your shoulders.
"Fuck," he grunted, thrusting into your mouth again. "I'm gonna cum," he warned, and you moaned to let him know it was okay.
You moved faster, hollowing your cheeks as you sucked his dick. You could hear the obscene sounds of his dick in your mouth and you moved your hands down to his balls, massaging them. You could feel them tighten, and then you heard Sunghoon moan once more as he thrust one last time into your mouth.
You didn't have time to move away before he shot his cum down your throat, and you almost choked in surprise. You swallowed quickly, trying not to gag as he continued to shoot into your mouth.
"Fuck," he groaned, rubbing your shoulder. "Sorry."
You pulled away from his dick, opening your mouth to show him. He looked down at you, watching as you swallowed again before he looked up at you with hooded eyes.
"Good girl," he breathed out, pushing his fingers through your hair.
You smiled up at him, reaching up to wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. He looked at your hand before he reached forward, pulling you up. He sat you on his lap, wrapping his arms around you.
"You were so good," he whispered, and he placed his hand on your face, rubbing his thumb over your cheek. He leaned forward, kissing you and you kissed him back.
You sighed, wrapping your arms around his neck. You pressed yourself closer to him, closing your eyes and enjoying the feeling of his warm lips on yours.
He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours as he smiled at you. "How about that movie?"
"Yeah," you nodded, sitting back. You watched him as he got up, reaching for the remote on the table. He pressed play on the movie, turning back to you and sitting down beside you again.
He wrapped his arm around you, pulling you close as he turned his attention to the movie that was still playing on the screen. He pressed his lips to your temple and you closed your eyes, letting out a small sigh.
You let yourself relax against him, enjoying his warmth as you pressed a kiss to his shoulder. Sunghoon looked down at you, raising his eyebrows as he looked back up at the TV.
You fell asleep before the movie was even halfway over.
Tumblr media
“Hey, are you busy this afternoon?"
You looked up at Sunghoon, raising an eyebrow.
"For what?" you asked.
He grinned at you, shaking his head. "For anything."
"I have to go grocery shopping later," you said, pursing your lips. "But that's it."
He nodded, still smiling at you.
You gave him a curious look, tilting your head to the side.
"What is it?" you asked.
"Can we go somewhere?" he asked.
"Like where?"
"Like a date," he said, his grin growing. "A proper date. A real one."
You blinked at him, trying to make sense of what he was saying.
"Like a real date?" you asked. "Like...a first date?"
Sunghoon laughed. "Yes. Like a first date."
You didn't know how to answer. You stared at him for a while before you looked down. You could feel your heart start to race and you were sure that he could see it beating under your shirt.
"What do you say?" Sunghoon asked, squeezing your knee. "Is that a yes?"
"Yes," you said immediately.
He grinned at you, rubbing your knee again. "Let's go to lunch and then we'll do something. How does that sound?"
"Okay," you breathed out, still trying to get used to the idea of having a real date with him.
Sunghoon grinned again, leaning forward and kissing your cheek.
"Perfect."
You got ready before he picked you up, and you found yourself actually being excited about this date. You wanted to let your worries go for the day and just spend time with him.
You were excited. You wanted to go on a date with Sunghoon, you really did. But your mood shifted as soon as you saw the text that appeared on your phone, minutes before Sunghoon was supposed to pick you up. 
Heeseung: I need to talk to you.
Heeseung: can we meet?
You barely hesitated before you replied. 
You: where?
Tumblr media
You felt nauseous as you stood outside the café. You tried to look for him, but there were a lot of people there. You could see the tables inside, but you couldn't see Heeseung.
You didn't want to do this. You were going to walk away.
You felt your phone buzz in your hand, and you looked down at it. You had a message.
 Heeseung: I'm at the table outside.
You looked around, finally finding him. He was sitting at a table outside, looking through the menu as he waited.
You could feel yourself get nervous as you made your way over, and you didn't know what to do. You didn't know what you were going to say.
You took a deep breath as you sat down across from him, placing your phone down on the table.
He looked up from the menu, meeting your eyes as he smiled softly. "Hey."
"Hi."
You fidgeted, staring at the table.
"I wanted to apologize," he said, breaking the silence. "For what I did to you. For everything I put you through. You deserved better than that."
You said nothing.
"I just wanted to apologize and tell you that you don't have to worry about me anymore," he said. "I'm not going to come near you or bother you again."
You felt yourself calm down a bit, and you looked up at him.
"You’re really an asshole, Lee Heeseung."
He laughed, shaking his head. "I know."
You stared at each other for a while, not saying anything. You couldn't figure out why you were there, but you didn't want to leave.
"Why are you doing this?" you asked, sighing.
He shrugged. "I just...I just feel like I need to say it."
You stayed silent, pursing your lips.
“And truthfully… I don’t think I can face Sunghoon again if I don’t say this.”
You frowned at that. Why couldn't he face Sunghoon again?
"What do you mean?"
He stared at you, before looking down at his lap. He shook his head.
“Hoon would kill me if I ever hurt you again. And he'd be right to. So I'm just trying to make sure that I don't."
"Hurt me again? Or be killed by Sunghoon?
"Both I guess," he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.
You stared at him for a moment before you started laughing.
"What?"
You shook your head, still laughing.
"Hoon wouldn't kill you. He’s too soft."
"You think?" Heeseung said, and you could see the hint of a smile on his lips. "I think he would."
"How come?”
He shrugged. "Because he loves you."
You stared at him for a moment, not knowing how to respond.
"Why are you telling me this?"
He looked down at the table, running his fingers over the edge of it.
"I want you to know the truth. I want you to know how I feel," he said. "And I want you to know that I don't want you to come back."
"Excuse me?" you said, and your voice was much harsher than you intended it to be.
"I mean," Heeseung said quickly. "I want you to move on and I don't want to drag you down."
"That's rich, coming from you," you muttered, looking away from him. "Especially since you're the reason I feel so depressed and sad."
He winced.
"But thanks for that,” you snapped. "I really needed to hear that."
You crossed your arms, pursing your lips.
"Look, I'm not trying to be a jerk-"
"Then stop talking."
You were really mad now. You felt tears starting to form in your eyes.
"You're not going to make this better for anyone by saying this," you said, clenching your fists. "It's too late for you to make it right. So why don't you just keep your mouth shut."
He said nothing, and you took a deep breath. You were surprised to realise that your heart didn’t hurt as much you thought it would. You were still upset, but the pain was gone.
"Just leave me alone," you muttered, picking your bag up. You stood up, trying to calm yourself down as you made your way out of the café.
You had almost forgotten about your date when you got home and the sight of a distraught Sunghoon outside your door took you by surprise.
"Where were you?" he asked immediately, pulling you into a hug. He pulled you against him tightly, and you wrapped your arms around him, closing your eyes as he squeezed you. “I’ve been worried sick.”
You felt the guilt sink over you. You hadn't even thought about your date. You hadn't even considered how Sunghoon would feel. You had been so caught up in seeing Heeseung that you had completely forgotten.
"I'm sorry," you whispered, clutching his shirt tightly.
"I was so worried," he said, pulling away from the hug. "You didn't even text me back and I called you so many times. Where were you?”
"I'm sorry," you repeated, and you could feel the tears forming in your eyes. "I just...I had to see him."
He stared at you, frowning. "Him?"
You nodded, letting out a shaky breath.
"Don't get mad," you said quickly. "Just don't. I had to see him, and that's it. I'm sorry."
His face hardened, and you saw his jaw clench.
"Who? Heeseung?"
You bit your lip, nodding your head again.
"I needed to see him," you said again, looking down. "He told me some things and I wanted to hear them from him. I don't know if he meant to or not, but he said-"
"Don't tell me," Sunghoon snapped, cutting you off. "I don't want to know. It doesn't matter."
"Hoon-"
"I don't want to know what he had to say," Sunghoon said, his voice louder. “It doesn’t matter anyways. No matter what shitty thing he says or does, you always go back to him. He keeps doing this to you, and you keep letting him."
He pushed past you and you reached out for him, but he moved out of your reach. You could see him running a hand through his hair, his fists clenched by his sides.
"I don't even know why I'm surprised," he said, shaking his head. "He's going to keep coming back. He's going to keep using you-"
"No-"
"-and I'm just going to sit back and watch it happen again," he snapped, and he turned around to look at you.
"That's not true!"
"Is it?" he shouted, taking a step towards you. "It is! All I am is a distraction for you!"
"Sunghoon-"
"I'm sorry for doing this," he said, cutting you off. "I'm sorry for putting up with it all."
You didn't know what he was talking about. You didn't understand where this was all coming from.
"I'm sorry," he repeated. "But this isn't working for me anymore."
"What isn't?"
"This," he said, gesturing between the two of you. "Us."
You were so confused right now. You really didn’t want to believe what was happening. 
"What are you saying?"
"I don't want to be your distraction anymore," he said. "I'm sorry. I just can't be around you right now."
You felt your heart drop and you took a step towards him.
"Hoon-"
"I'm sorry," he said again.
He turned away from you, walking down the hall. He walked quickly, his back straight as you tried to keep up with him.
"Hoon wait-"
He ignored you, walking faster. You kept pace with him, trying to keep up as he made his way down the stairs. He didn't look back, didn't say anything to you as he walked down the sidewalk.
You stood in the doorway, watching as he walked away from you. You wanted to run after him, to pull him back and demand to know why.
But you knew that you weren't going to.
He didn't look back. He didn't even slow down as he walked away, leaving you alone.
You could feel the tears start to run down your face. 
You didn't even realise how much you cared about him until you couldn't see him anymore.
Tumblr media
Sunghoon was a wreck.
He felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and thrown on the floor, stomped on, and then tossed into the garbage.
It was his own fault really. He had known this was going to happen. He had known from the moment he agreed to let himself fall for you. He was a fool.
“That’s it, I’m tired of you moping around the house."
Sunghoon looked up at Jay, blinking.
"What?"
"You heard me," Jay said, shaking his head. "You need to get up and go get laid or something.”
"I'm not interested," Sunghoon mumbled, lying back down on his bed. He rolled over, pulling the pillow over his head. He closed his eyes, trying to ignore Jay.
"I don't believe that," Jay said, leaning over to smack the back of Sunghoon's head. "You've been moping around the house for two weeks. It's time to get over her."
"Get out of my room," Sunghoon groaned, clutching the pillow tightly. "I'm sleeping."
"You haven't been sleeping."
Sunghoon glared up at Jay, shoving the pillow away and sitting up.
"What do you want?" he snapped.
Jay leaned back in his chair, giving Sunghoon a grin. "I want you to go out with me tonight."
Sunghoon glared at him, rubbing his temples. "Why?"
"Because we haven't hung out in a while," Jay said, shrugging his shoulders. "We can get drinks or something."
Sunghoon looked away from Jay, shaking his head. He didn't want to go out and have fun. He didn't want to hang out with people. He didn't want to do anything.
"Look, you need to get out of the house," Jay said, sighing. "You're only going to make yourself worse. You need to move on."
"Move on?" Sunghoon said, and he let out a humourless laugh. "I haven't even seen her in a while."
"But you're still thinking about her," Jay said, his voice softer. "And I think you need to move on."
Sunghoon couldn't find the words to reply.
"Come on, it'll be fun," Jay said, clapping his hands. "We'll go out and get drinks, and maybe we can even pick up some girls."
Sunghoon felt his chest start to tighten.
"It'll be fun."
Sunghoon took a deep breath, letting his body fall back down on his bed. He turned to the side, closing his eyes as he sighed.
He heard Jay sigh.
"Okay," Jay said, getting up from his chair. "If you don't want to come-"
"Okay, okay, I'll go."
Jay grinned, leaning over to pat Sunghoon on the head.
"Good. I'll see you tonight then."
He left Sunghoon's room and Sunghoon groaned into his pillow.
It was going to be a long night.
"So what do you want to do?"
Sunghoon took another sip from his nth drink (he had already lost count), shaking his head. He looked around the bar, before looking back at Jay. "I don't know. This is a waste of time."
"It's not a waste of time," Jay said. "It's fun to go out and see people."
"I guess," Sunghoon said, sipping from his drink again.
"That girl in the back keeps looking at you," Jay said, nodding towards the corner of the room.
Sunghoon turned around, seeing the girl Jay was talking about. She was smiling at him, and Sunghoon gave her a nod. He looked away, sipping his drink again.
"Well?" Jay said. "Go over there and get her."
Sunghoon glanced at her again, before turning back to Jay.
"You're an asshole."
Jay laughed.
Sunghoon finished his drink, getting up. He ignored Jay as he left the table, walking towards the bar to get another drink.
He took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves. It was already bad enough that he had to be here. He didn't need Jay trying to push him into things.
"Hey."
Sunghoon turned around, seeing the girl from before. She had a drink in her hand and she was smiling at him. Shit. 
"Uh-"
"I'm so sorry if I'm being forward," she said, leaning forward and resting her hand on his chest. "But you looked like you were ready to leave and I just thought-"
"No, it's fine," he said quickly, shaking his head. He stepped towards her, letting her place her hand on his shoulder. "I was actually just leaving."
"Oh, well, do you want to get out of here then?"
She bit her lip, giving him a suggestive look.
"Um-"
"Or we could stay if you want?" she asked, and she pressed her hand on his chest.
Perhaps he was drunker than he had realised, or perhaps it was the way her fingers brushed over his skin, but Sunghoon couldn't find the strength to say no.
He looked at her again, nodding his head slowly. "Yeah. Okay."
"Yeah?" she asked, giving him a grin. "You're cute."
She grabbed his hand, dragging him through the crowd. She pushed past people, heading towards the door and Sunghoon tried not to get annoyed with her. She pulled him outside, stopping as she turned to him.
"Do you want to come to my place?" she asked, reaching out and grabbing his wrist.
"I don't think-"
She laughed. "Oh, I'm not offering to make you breakfast in the morning," she said, and she ran her hand down his arm, squeezing his hand. "You want to fuck, right?"
Sunghoon didn't say anything.
"Right?" she repeated.
"Yeah," he breathed out. "That's...that's what I'm here for."
"Okay, so let's go," she said, squeezing his hand. She started pulling him down the street, and Sunghoon let her.
He was in a daze. He couldn't stop thinking about you. He couldn't stop thinking about your laugh and your smile and how much he missed hearing your voice. He couldn't stop thinking about how much he missed your warmth.
He looked down at the girl in front of him, wondering how he had ended up here. She was nice, sure, but he knew this wasn't what he wanted.
He just wanted you.
"Wait."
She turned around, looking at him as she raised an eyebrow.
"What?"
He stared at her, and he was silent for a moment. He bit his lip, before he sighed.
"You're nice," he said, shaking his head. "But I don't want to do this."
She frowned at him, shaking her head. "You said-"
"I know," he said. "I know what I said."
He didn't give her an explanation. He didn't even look back at her as he walked away, leaving her standing in the street. He shoved his hands in his pockets, walking quickly as he tried to block out the sound of her yelling at him.
He felt like an idiot.
He was in the middle of an argument with himself when he arrived home. He didn't have the strength to get changed before he collapsed onto the couch, closing his eyes and hoping that he would fall asleep soon.
"What are you doing here?"
Sunghoon opened his eyes, turning his head.
You were standing over him, frowning at him. He sat up, trying not to look as shocked as he felt.
"What?" he asked.
"What are you doing here?" you asked, gesturing to the living room. His eyes started to come back into focus and slowly he realized he wasn't home. In his drunken daze he had come back to your apartment instead.
"Shit," he whispered, running his hands through his hair. "Fuck. I'm sorry."
You didn't say anything, just stood there with your arms crossed and you frowned at him.
He got up from the couch, trying to pull himself together as he grabbed his jacket from the floor. He couldn't remember even taking it off.
"I'm sorry," he repeated.
“Are you drunk?” you asked, shaking your head.
He didn't say anything. He looked down, putting on his jacket and trying to push past you. He needed to get out of here before you made him say something that he would regret.
"Are you drunk?" you repeated.
He looked at you, sighing as he turned back around to face you.
"I am," he said, raising his hand to rub his forehead. He was suddenly so tired. "I was out with Jay and I just...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come here."
You were silent for a moment before you looked away.
“Stay here for the night."
Sunghoon didn't know how to respond. He stood there, staring at you for what seemed like an eternity. He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears.
"Stay," you said again. "I'll get you a blanket and pillow."
"You don't have to," he said. "I can just go home-"
"Stay," a pause before you whispered. “Please.”
Sunghoon sighed, running a hand through his hair. He couldn't bring himself to say no to you, no matter how much he wanted to.
He was too tired to argue anyway.
He dropped down on the couch, listening to you move around in your bedroom. He heard you walking back, before you came back with the blanket and pillow in your arms. You dropped them on the couch, reaching for him.
"Sit down," you said.
He did as you asked, and he let you push him back against the cushions. He let you cover him with the blanket, tucking it in around him.
You sat on the edge of the couch, leaning forward to place your hand on his cheek.
"Are you okay?" you asked softly.
He sighed, looking up at you.
"Are you okay?" he repeated.
You were silent for a moment before you let out a sigh. "No. I'm not."
He didn't ask why. He just looked down, staring at your hand against his cheek. He was tempted to place his hand on yours. He wanted to grab it and squeeze it and feel the warmth of your skin.
He didn't though.
"I’m sorry I couldn’t be Heeseung.”
It was only when he heard himself say that he realised he had even been thinking it.
He winced, and he closed his eyes tightly. He turned his head away from you, trying not to cry.
"Hoon-"
He shook his head, covering his face with his hands as he tried to breathe. He felt your fingers against his skin, and he held your hand. He turned his head, placing your hand against his cheek as he looked at you.
“I don’t want you to be Heeseung," you said softly.
Sunghoon blinked at you, swallowing the lump in his throat as he watched your eyes.
"What?"
"I don't want you to be Heeseung," you repeated. “I wanted you. Sunghoon. My Hoon.”
"Why?" he whispered. "You chose him-"
"I didn't."
Sunghoon didn't say anything.
"I didn't," you said again, squeezing his hand. "He just showed up and I was so confused and I couldn't think straight. And I know I messed up so many times but I didn’t know how to deal with it all. I didn't know what to do, so I-"
You broke off, taking a deep breath before you looked up at him again.
"I'm so sorry. I know I messed up but I couldn't-"
Sunghoon cupped your cheek with his hand, stroking your cheekbone with his thumb. You pressed your face into his hand, letting out a shaky sigh.
"I missed you so much."
You nodded, closing your eyes as you let out another breath.
"I missed you too."
You leaned forward, wrapping your arms around him. He pulled you onto his lap, holding you tightly as you pressed your face into his chest. You pressed your cheek against him, wrapping your arms around him and squeezing him tightly. He slid one arm around your waist, placing his hand on your back as he squeezed you tighter.
He closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of your body against his. You were here in his arms again and he wasn't going to let you go.
"Don't leave me," he whispered, burying his face in your hair.
"I won't," you whispered back.
He took a deep breath, squeezing you again as he held you close.
"Never again."
Tumblr media
Sunghoon woke up with a head splitting headache.
He opened his eyes slowly, before letting out a groan. He closed them again, turning his face away from the sunlight streaming through the window. He covered his face with his arm, letting out a loud groan.
"Shit," he groaned again.
"Drink this."
Sunghoon lowered his arm, looking over to see you sitting on the edge of the couch, holding a glass of water and pills. He blinked at you, rubbing his eyes as he took the water and pills from you. He took a deep breath, letting out a sigh as he sat up slowly.
You sat next to him, grabbing his hand as he reached for the water. He downed it quickly, dropping his hand as you took the glass back from him.
"Thanks," he groaned, running a hand through his hair. He turned to you, squinting at you as you gave him a soft smile.
"Good morning," you said. "How do you feel?"
Sunghoon groaned again, rubbing his temples. "My head hurts."
"That's what happens when you drink a lot," you said, shaking your head. You reached for him, and he leaned his head against your shoulder. You ran your fingers through his hair, and he let out another groan.
"What time is it?"
"A little after ten," you said, and he could hear the smile in your voice.
"I have to get home and shower," he muttered, closing his eyes. "And change."
“You can shower here. And I still have some of your clothes.”
He looked up at you in confusion. “Did I leave my clothes here?”
You averted his eyes, suddenly very interested on the rug infront of the couch. “I uh... might have taken a few of your hoodies. And shirts. And a sweater and some shorts."
Sunghoon laughed, shaking his head. "Of course you did."
He reached forward, pulling you down onto the couch. You squealed in surprise as he wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly as he pressed his face into your neck.
"I missed you," he murmured, placing a kiss against your skin.
You laughed softly, placing your hands on his chest. You pushed him back, meeting his eyes as you gave him a smile.
"I missed you too."
Sunghoon squeezed you again, leaning forward to press a kiss to your lips. You kissed back, humming as you closed your eyes.
He pulled away from the kiss, leaning his forehead against yours. 
“I would kiss you more but I really want to freshen up first. Do you want to join me in the shower?” he asked, giving you a suggestive look.
You laughed, shoving his shoulder playfully. "Sure. Let's get you freshened up."
Sunghoon laughed, letting you sit up. He let you grab his hand, leading him out of the living room and down the hall to your bathroom.
Sunghoon smiled at you as he watched you turn on the water in the shower, waiting for it to warm up. You grabbed the hem of your shirt, pulling it up over your head and tossing it into the laundry basket. He couldn't take his eyes off you as you reached behind you, undoing your bra. He watched as you pulled it off, tossing it into the laundry basket as well. You reached for your pants, slowly pushing them down your legs as you gave him a sly smile.
“What are you looking at?
He swallowed, shaking his head as he looked away. "Nothing.”
You giggled, turning back to the shower as you undid your pants, pushing them down and stepping out of them. You looked back at him as you slid off your panties, smiling at him as you reached up and undid your hair. You ran your fingers through it, letting out a sigh as you shook it out.
"Hoon."
"Yeah?"
"You’re still dressed. And you’re staring at me again."
"Right."
Sunghoon was starting to think that his brain-to-mouth filter wasn't functioning correctly today.
He pulled off his shirt, dropping it onto the floor before he slid off his pants and underwear. You watched him with a smirk on your lips and Sunghoon felt himself growing hard. He stepped into the shower, pulling you to him and kissing you as you laughed.
He could feel the water dripping down his back as you pushed him against the shower wall. He wrapped an arm around your waist, squeezing your ass with his other hand. You let out a giggle against his lips, pulling away to press your lips against his neck.
"Fuck, I missed you," Sunghoon groaned.
"I missed you too," you said softly.
"Show me," Sunghoon said, running his hands up your back. He grabbed your face with both hands, pulling you back for another kiss. You kissed him back, moaning softly against his lips as you pressed yourself against him.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, letting him grab your ass again and lift you up. You gasped against his lips, wrapping your legs around him. He pressed you against the wall, pushing himself against you as he squeezed your ass again.
"Hoon," you moaned, sliding your hands down his shoulders and to his chest. You broke the kiss, looking at him with a smile on your lips.
"What?"
“I love you."
Sunghoon stopped, and you panicked. 
"Hoon-"
"Say that again," Sunghoon whispered, brushing a wet lock of hair away from your face.
You stared at him for a moment, biting your lip as you felt your heart start to race.
You took a deep breath, and you felt a smile spread across your lips. "I love you."
Sunghoon let out a breath, before he kissed you again. He pressed his lips against yours, kissing you deeply as you sighed against him. You held onto him tightly as he squeezed you again, grinding against you. He was so hard and you could feel the head of his dick pressing against your folds.
"Hoon," you moaned again, pulling away from him. You reached down, grabbing his dick and stroking him slowly. You could feel your pussy starting to grow wet, and you squeezed him again, moaning softly.
"Fuck," he groaned, resting his forehead against yours. He looked into your eyes, his own clouded with lust as he smiled at you. "You're gonna make me cum if you keep that up."
You bit your lip, continuing to stroke him as you gave him a coy look. You kissed him, sliding your hand down his chest. "Maybe that's the point."
"Oh? Is that so?" Sunghoon grinned, moving forward and kissing you again. "So you don’t want me to fuck you?”
You let out a moan as his dick pressed against your clit. "I want you to fuck me."
Sunghoon let out a deep groan, squeezing your ass with both hands as he kissed you again.
"Fuck, I love you," he moaned against your lips. He pulled away from you, reaching for your neck as he sucked a hickey on your skin. "I love you."
He lowered you to your feet, turning you around. He grabbed your waist, and you let out a gasp as you felt his dick press against you. He pushed your hair out of the way, kissing your back as he slid his hand down your front, reaching for your clit.
He rubbed it slowly, making you moan as he slid his other arm around you, holding you close to him. He pressed his lips against the back of your shoulder, and you arched your back as you let out a moan.
"Fuck," you moaned, trying to push back against him. He let out a laugh, continuing to rub your clit as he grinded against your ass.
You squeezed your eyes shut, letting out another loud moan. You felt him press his lips against your skin, and you could feel his smirk as he kept teasing you.
You could feel the head of his dick slide between your folds, and you moaned again as he rubbed against your clit.
He ran his hands up your front, squeezing your breasts before he moved them down again. He grabbed your waist, squeezing them tightly as he pushed you forward a bit. You placed your hands against the wall, leaning forward and bracing yourself as you felt him rub the head of his dick against your clit.
"Hoon," you moaned, closing your eyes as you felt his dick rub against you again. "Please."
He rubbed his dick between your folds, smearing your wetness around as he rubbed against your clit. You were getting impatient now, and you moved your hips a bit, trying to get him to move forward.
He let out a low growl, before he pressed the head of his dick into you.
"Ah," you gasped, letting your head fall forward.
You felt him start to move slowly, pushing himself into you inch by inch as you moaned his name. You clutched the wall tightly, letting out a loud moan as he continued to push himself into you. You felt him move your hair away from your shoulder, pressing a kiss to your neck.
"You're so tight," he whispered into your ear, before biting down gently on your skin.
You moaned again, leaning against him as he grabbed your waist. He pulled out, sliding back into you again and you gasped.
He slid out again, this time grabbing your ass and squeezing it tightly as he pressed himself into you again. He continued to thrust into you, and you moaned his name as you he out a low sigh. He grabbed your hair again, pulling it back as he started to move faster, fucking into you with a roughness you didn't expect.
"You feel so good," Sunghoon moaned. “Pussy made just for me."
You couldn't even respond. You were completely lost in the feeling of his dick sliding into you. You were so wet and you could feel your own slick on your thighs.
You moved your hips back, meeting his thrusts as he moved faster.
"That's it baby," Sunghoon whispered. "You feel so good around me."
You could feel your orgasm starting to build, and you let out another loud moan.
"So good," Sunghoon groaned, and he slid one hand down your front, rubbing your clit slowly.
"Hoon!" you cried out, moving your hips against his hand as he kept moving his hips. You could feel your pussy starting to clench around him and you moaned his name again.
"Fuck, you're close," he groaned, rubbing your clit faster. "I can feel you clenching around me."
"I'm so close," you cried out, leaning forward as he pulled you back by your hair. You braced yourself on the wall, closing your eyes as you felt yourself growing close. You felt him pull out of you suddenly, and you turned your head back to look at him.
"Hoon, what-"
He grabbed your hair, pushing you against the shower wall again. He slid back into you, pressing himself into you as you let out a moan.
He fucked into you hard, and you tried to look at him over your shoulder. He pressed his lips against your shoulder, moaning as he pushed himself deep inside of you. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as he fucked you.
"I love you," he said, his voice low and his breath hot on your neck. "I love you so much."
You bit your lip, moaning his name as he thrust into you again.
"That's it," Sunghoon groaned. "Call my name like that again."
You moaned his name again, arching your back as he continued to thrust into you. You were so close to coming now, and you felt your orgasm start to take over.
"I'm going to cum," you moaned, reaching back to grab onto his hand. "I'm going to-"
You felt him thrust into you again, and you felt your orgasm hit you. You moaned loudly, letting your head fall forward as he let out a loud groan.
"Fuck, you're squeezing my dick," Sunghoon growled. "You're so good at sucking me in."
You clenched around him, feeling him pull you back as he thrust into you again.
"Fuck!" he cried out, and you felt him twitch inside of you. You felt his cum shoot into you, and you clenched around him again, squeezing him tightly.
He let go of you, sliding out of you as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder. You turned around to face him, placing your hand on his cheek. You looked up at him with a smile on your lips.
He gave you a tired grin, leaning forward to press his forehead against yours.
"Can never get tired of that," he muttered, giving you a wink.
"Shut up."
He laughed, and you shook your head. You pushed him backwards, grabbing the showerhead as you grabbed his arm and pushed him under the stream of water.
"Hey!" he shouted, trying to push you away as he laughed.
You laughed, turning the showerhead off before you pulled him back to you, kissing him as you slid your arms around him.
"So, I was thinking that we could go out to dinner tonight and then we could go see a movie," he said. “You still owe me a date."
You grinned, kissing his cheek. "Yeah? That sounds nice."
"Yeah?" he said, pulling you back into the spray of the shower. You let him push you under the water, letting out a laugh as he ran his hands up your back.
"I'd love that."
2K notes · View notes
pinkmirth · 9 months
Note
nfl reiner braun tears his alc and requests the best surgeon to work on it. he gets, youuuu, sweet smelling pink doctor coat wearing you and he can’t even take you serious when you’re going over his chart or requesting to feel the muscle with those pink gloves on. you even look younger than him and he’s telling you: “darlin’, listen… im a big deal around here and i need someone to help fix me not give me a boner.” or something like that and you almost don’t have the heart to tell him that you’re the best that there’s ever been at this hospital.
RECOVERY, reiner braun !
Tumblr media
୨୧ — pairing: footballer!reiner braun x fem!reader
୨୧ — synopsis: this doctor’s got a hardheaded patient! it’ll take some effort to convince him of your effectiveness . . .
୨୧ — contains: ( 1.4k words of . . . ) modern au, slight nsfw (more like suggestive!), footballer!reiner, surgeon!reader, fem!reader (black coded), reiner has an ACL tear, reiner’s touch-deprived/sexually frustrated, rei’s kindaaa conceited (just a little bit!), palming, minors shoo!
୨୧ — mira’s note: ramona, my love! i adore all your reiner concepts, they’re always sooo perfect 🎀 thank youuu for sharing your rei-rei thoughts with me :) now here’s a lil drabble for my gorgeous man! (not really proofread thoroughly, i apologize for any typos or mistakes!)
Tumblr media
isopropyl.
it’s all that reiner can smell. he’s a healthy man, he hardly belongs here— in this chilled surgeon office with the most pale, unflattering lighting. the parchment-like exam table paper rustles beneath him with every stretch and maneuver he makes, and his weight is enough to pry a creak out of the treatment table every now and again.
a recurring clack of footsteps and the whine of the door lets reiner know that you, the ‘sexy doctor lady from earlier’ has returned from reading his screenings. he wasn’t able to catch your name amidst the splitting pain from his acl tear, so that’ll make do in the meantime.
you set down your clipboard and turn to face him. your dear patient appears a bit mussed from the big game that took place earlier— his golden hair’s all fluffy and wild, that red football uniform of his is streaked with the green of the field, and his left cheekbone got a little scratch somehow. you’ll make sure to dab that with rubbing alcohol later.
“your vitals are well above average.” you commend. his reply’s a mere grunt. he can’t bring himself to take you seriously. just fucking look at you; pink latex gloves pulled over manicured hands, welcoming eyes all doe and shiny, with a sweet glossed smile that he won’t forget for days to come. he hates having to meet such a beauty under these grim circumstances– after all, you’re the kind of woman he’d take out on a date.
“lucky for you, mister braun, your injury isn’t a complete tear . . . so your recovery time shouldn’t be too long. it’ll last about six months, give or take.”
he isn’t listening.
reiner isn’t even sure of when he began to space out; your lips are just so plush, so alluring. his surname sounds sweeter than it should when falling from your mouth. before long, you clear your throat. it’s enough to snap him out of it. “i’d appreciate your undivided attention, sir. we’re currently going over your healing plan— ”
“lemme ask you, sugar,” he interjects with a low rasp. reiner braun’s well known around these parts, and you can only assume that being such a big deal has gotten to his head. what he says next throws you off, “when’s the real doctor comin’ in, hm?” it’s hard to remain professional, but you do. no furrowed brows, no scrunched up face— nothing but a tight, forced smile.
you suck in a breath through your nose, maintaining composure. “what makes you think it isn’t me, mister braun?” he can hear the tinge of vexation in your voice. clearly, this footballer has struck a chord or two.
“you’ve got pink gloves on, barbie.” he snarks out a laugh, just a bit mean. he’s much too handsome for such a condescending tone.
you bring a gloved hand flat to his chest, pushing reiner back into the examination table. his breath catches in his throat when you knead your fingers into his thigh, right where the tear resides beneath firm muscle. you’re assertive, and goddamn, does he love it.
“i’m your doctor.” you assure, voice firm. he groans out at the calculated pressure; it feels good. makes the throb of pain fade, just a bit.
“you’ll have to put some faith in me, hm?” your tone is warm, words soft and patient in a way he doesn’t deserve. reiner can’t lie, it was crass of him to have undermined you that way.
“my apologies, doc.” he addresses you in the rightest way he can. it’s his tiny little way of making amends.
“so, how long— fuck, how long did ‘ya study for?” reiner tries for small talk, voice low and shaken. you’d like to believe that whatever left his lips just now wasn’t a moan. no, it was more like . . . a groan of pain, perhaps?
“about six years. graduated early,” no wonder you look just about his age, if not younger. all his previous doctors were just as old as his parents.
“smart and pretty, huh?” he graces you with a feeble grin, a white gleam of teeth surrounded by neatly trimmed stubble. it’s safe to say that he’s your hottest patient up to date.
you continue on with prodding into the thick meat of his left thigh, and those throaty whines of his make you feel a way you simply shouldn’t.
it’s been a while since reiner’s been touched this way. he knows it’s just a regular inspection for his stupid injury, but he can’t recall the last time a woman’s splayed their hands on his body. he’s always busy with football this, training that. there’s never any time remaining for hook-ups, talkless of a relationship. that being said, it isn’t long before he begins to grow excited.
“m— mister braun,” you call out, voice airy, “you seem a little, um . . . worked up.”
“huh?” his eyes flit up to meet yours. you lock onto his honey-brown pools of desperation.
nothing else is uttered. you wordlessly direct your gaze towards his crotch, and give him a knowing look. reiner finally catches on— he fucking knew he felt his bottoms getting tight. hesitantly, the blonde lifts his head to peer down at his pants. surely enough, a boner’s prodding at the centering cloth of his football shorts.
“goddamn,” he drops his head back onto the examination table, bashfully throwing his forearm over his eyes. humiliation eats at the proud man, reducing him to a jumble of hormones.
you can hardly bring yourself to contain your chuckle, which makes his reddened cheeks burn further. it seems that his bodily reaction to your skilled hands has given him a sense of humility at best, and embarrassment at worst.
“i’ve never been appointed to a lady before . . .” is his hushed excuse. he’s still got his eyes shielded with his arm— he can’t even fucking bear to look at you. it’ll only spur him on further.
‘i turn you on?’ is what you’re just longing to question him. you know that you do— he’s been looking at your lips with bated breath since he got here. not to mention the peeks he’d taken at your ass whenever you turned around to read his chart or grab a cotton ball.
it’s quite bold of you— more like dangerous— to bring your ministrations upwards, closer to the ache under his pants. you’d tell yourself to stay on task, but professionalism has long been thrown out the window.
your gloved hands trail mischievously, placed directly atop reiner’s hard-on. warmth radiates from your palm, and you squeeze. his eyes blink shut, hips gently bucking upwards. his tear burns from beneath his skin, but he doesn’t fucking care. he bets he could cum from your hands alone.
reiner eventually manages to pull his arm away from blocking his viewpoint, chest heaving with every passing second. if you were to use your stethoscope on him, his heartbeat would be nothing short of erratic.
“trust me, mister braun,” is your reassuring whisper, “you’re in good hands.”
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
transmascissues · 6 months
Text
some thoughts about top surgery recovery, as of 3 days post-op:
when they say using your chest muscles sucks afterward, i never realized exactly how much was going to be be limited. coughing, sneezing, hiccuping, laughing — all of it is terrifying right now. even talking for too long starts to put that kind of stress on my chest, and my voice isn’t as strong as it usually is. it takes me forever to fully empty my bladder when i’m on the toilet because i’m totally relying on gravity to do all the work (and shitting was effectively impossible without a stool softener even though i haven’t taken the pain meds they said i would need them for)…and don’t even get me started on figuring out how to wipe (hint: back to front while sitting, using my dominant hand to push my non-dominant hand far back enough). using the computer is also harder — i was planning on playing lots of baldur’s gate after, but for the first couple days i could only really go for a few minutes before using my arms that way got too tiring. having a mastectomy pillow has been an absolute godsend when i’m using my phone because i can prop my arms up on it and not really have to use any muscles at all to hold them up.
the biggest piece of not being able to use my chest muscles right now, which i’m writing separately because it’s been such a huge thing for me, is that i cannot sit up or back by myself at fucking all. like, if i sit on the couch and lean back a bit to sit against the cushion, it hurts to pull myself back up to fully straight — and if i’m leaning back any more than that, i just can’t do it at all and i’m stuck there unless my boyfriend puts their hands behind me and pushes my dead weight back up. i totally get why some people sleep in a recliner now because i’m completely at the mercy of having someone there to help move me around once i’m at any sort of angle. sitting back is mostly the same as far as what i can do, and arguably hurts worse to attempt at all, but my ability to do it seems to be coming back faster than my ability to sit up. if you’ve never had your mobility limited to that extent before, prepare yourself: the first time you’re stuck somewhere and the person who normally helps you doesn’t answer immediately can be really fucking scary (i learned that the hard way).
the anesthesiologist warned me that i might have a sore throat after surgery from being intubated, but i was not prepared for what “sore throat” ended up meaning for me. you know that feeling of swallowing something that’s too big and you can still feel it in your throat even after it’s down? it’s like that times 20, and further down in my throat. the worst pain i’ve felt in the last three days wasn’t from the surgery itself, it was from trying to swallow pancakes when my throat was at it’s worst. today is the first day it’s even started to fade, and even now, it hurts just to swallow my own spit. i don’t know about you, but that’s not what comes to mind when someone tells me “you might have a sore throat”.
on that note, the incisions themselves have really been the least painful part in general, probably because the nerves there aren’t reconnected yet. the vast majority of my pain and discomfort at this point has been from the drains and bandages — the drain sites getting sore or just randomly starting to sting, waking up feeling suffocated by the ace bandages, etc. it’s not because anything is wrong with them — the drains weren’t placed wrong and the bandages aren’t too tight, they’re just a huge pain in the ass to deal with 24/7. i can’t express how much i’m looking forward to getting the drains out and being able to take binder breaks because it’ll make things so much more comfortable.
my incisions are connected in the middle because my chest tissue was all really close together, and the part where the incisions connect is really the only part where i’ve felt any pain so far. i suspect it’s because the swelling on either side is making that part of the incision push together and press against itself, and then the binder pushes on it even more. it’s not a severe pain at all, but i do sometimes lift the center of the bandage off my chest for a second to give that spot a bit of a break.
i’ve already started getting some of the weird sensations associated with nerves reconnecting, and it definitely is wild. so far, it’s been mostly tingly feelings, sometimes like chills and sometimes more like a limb falling asleep. (weird observation: taking a shit makes my ribs tingle? i’ve got no good explanation for that one.) i’ve gotten a zap on one side and some buzzing feelings too. it’s pretty mild right now, probably because it’s so early on.
i’ve also gotten what i would describe as phantom boob feelings, especially on the first night. specifically, when i close my eyes, sometimes i’ll feel like someone is touching or jiggling the boobs i don’t have anymore. definitely not a super pleasant experience, but i think being out of it from the anesthesia still really helped me not be too upset by the worst of it. i’ve gotten a couple little phantom nipple touches too, but those were just split second blips of sensation that were far less bothersome in comparison.
i never realized that the classic post-op hunch is caused more by the binder than by the body itself, but we had to take all of my bandages off the night after my surgery to send pictures of something to my surgeon, and i was shocked by how much straighter i could sit with everything off. i was definitely still hunched, but it was more like a natural slouch and less like i looked like i was using an invisible walker. with the binder on, it’s super uncomfortable for me to try to stand straight at all because it feels like the ace bandage doesn’t come with my body and just drags everything down, and i’m always holding my mastectomy pillow or my hands to my chest while i walk around to stop it from feeling like gravity is going make the bandage tear my chest open.
every so often, when things are getting especially painful or uncomfortable or just generally difficult, i do start to wonder if i made the right choice. not because i regret getting rid of those things — not by a long shot — but because it’s a fucking hard process to go through. this is probably the hardest thing for me to admit, but the rational part of my mind knows it’s natural to feel that way once in a while. all of this is temporary and the relief from dysphoria will be permanent, but right now? this is my entire world and it doesn’t feel particularly temporary and i do have moments of “why do i have to go through all this when other people get to just have the right body from the start? why couldn’t i just live with what i had? why can’t i just be living my normal life right now?” no matter how sure you are of your choice, no matter how proud you are of being trans, this shit is hard and it’s okay to feel that.
i’m going to put the pictures of my chest one day post-op under the cut, because i think it’s pretty rare to see pictures from that soon after the surgery. they’re not gorey at all — the actual incisions are totally covered by steri strips and everything around them is clean — but still, if you don’t want to see relatively fresh surgery results, don’t look under the cut.
for all the discomfort and pain and limitations and other weirdness of recovery, every time i look at these pictures it reminds me of exactly why i’m doing all of this, and i’m so glad i kept fighting for this for so long. some people might never understand why someone would choose to go through this whole process, but i know it’ll be worth it in the end.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
here’s my chest one day post-op! i think it looks super good and my surgeon said it looks like it’s healing perfectly (as much as it can be healing at one day). for reference, my chest was a DDD/F before surgery. i know this isn’t how my chest will look in the end, but i’m already thrilled with how things are turning out! i’ve truly never been more confident in my choice of surgeon — like, come on! look at that! she did so good!
874 notes · View notes
misslovasstuff · 7 months
Text
Prompt: “Wanna go on an adventure?”
You say whilst wearing a sexy dress that’d leave any man drooling.
paired with: Sanji, Zoro and Ace.
warning: contains nsfw, minors are asked not to interact.
author’s note: the opening line for Ace is the smoothest thing I’ve ever written till now. If you guys want me to continue any of this, let me know.
Sanji:
“Goodness, - he eyes you up and down. - oh my oh my oh my…!”
The cook’s mouth drops as he covers it with his hand in complete disbelief.
“You’re such a merciless woman! - Sanji approaches slowly, caressing your arm with the back of his hand just to feel you and understand that what’s happening right now is certainly not a dream. - Don’t you know what you do to me when you wear clothes like these~
He grabs your bra strap on your shoulder and pulls it, hitting your skin, all whilst never shifting his gaze away from your eyes which were too shy to look back. A small moan escapes your mouth as you look at your man in a new light, since he’s never done this before.
“Sanji… - you call him breathily, as there is a passion in his eyes you recognised very well. - you’re being so…ahh…”
His hand caresses your back and stops low. You can’t tell what he’s doing until your dress begins to losen up.
He reveals the bow tie he had just removed, putting it in between your faces as he whispers: “you’ve wrapped yourself like a present for me, my lady. “
His left hand pulls you by the waist while the other brushes off some strands of hair out of your face, thus making your eyes meet: you realise how beautifully intense his gaze on you, as if he was looking at a dream come true.
His charms were too much to handle, making you gulp hard as you glance at his lips, so much so that Sanji might have heard it. His instincts are insane, he knows what you’re feeling and why every single time.
“I did put this on for you.” - Sanji averts his eyes for a moment, staring at your body with a smirk after your reply. The dress was revealing but still managed to leave space for imagination to fill. And, anybody who knows men, especially the ones like Sanji, know that this is all they want to get that fire going.
He grabs your chin gently and kisses your cheek. You surely know because of Sanji about those kisses where the impact of his lips is like a signature on your skin and you just feel it as if he was kissing your soul, you absorb it with every fiber of your being.
“Right, you wanted to go on an adventure? - he smirks before kissing your face again and again in such an agonising small pace, letting you wanting more, so much more.. - You might take me on one, under one condition.”
You raise an eyebrow and grin:
“Oh really, you’re putting conditions now, huh?” - you say, playing with his hair as your arms rest on his shoulders. - What is it that my prince wants?”
“Well, adventures are dangerous so, - Sanji begins to kiss you on the lips soflty, as he speaks in between, - might have to keep you very close to me. - his lips move down your neck, fingers brushing off skin before he kisses and sucks there. Slight moans are already being heard from you. - not to mention all the excitement…
You’re completely pulled in by him. Not only physically, but your entire being deviates towards his body, like a moth to a burning flame.
“I’ll take… responsibility for it all…” - your breath begins to shorten as you drown your face in the nape of his neck, taking in his fragrance like it was a life-saving drug.
“You’re gonna take care of me, huh? Alright then, the most important thing is, - suddenly he goes down in one knee, grabbing your leg and placing your foot to rest on his thigh while he caresses the inner part of yours. - you gotta let me undress you bit by bit, on my own, throughly.”
You smirk, raising your dress just a bit higher to reveal more to his bare eye. That’s see how long it’s gonna take until this dress finds itself on the floor.
“Deal. All yours.”
Zoro:
“Oh, look at that. Someone’s been feeding her imagination lately.” - Zoro is sat on a chair, looking like he had just finished a glass of booze.
“Only mine?” - you close the door behind you, staying firm in front of him.
Zoro’s eyes adventure in your body before he spins his index finger as to signal you to turn around 360 degrees for him.
So you do.
If only there was a way do describe the way his eyes stared you down, as if he was consuming you only with his gaze. After taking a last sip out of his glass, he puts it away, licking his lips.
“Come here.” - he demands by patting his lap for you to sit.
You compose yourself on his thigh, the rest of your legs resting on his other whilst your long and tender arms wrap themselves around his neck.
Zoro scans your face with a smirk that hides so many nasty thoughts which only occurred when he was with you like this.
“Tell me about that adventure you were talking about.” - he claims with a low and deep voice, brushing your chin with his thumb.
Perhaps it was the booze or perhaps it was you who had gotten the swordsman a bit tipsy.
Zoro pushes your hair away from your shoulders, planting gentle but rooted kisses there.
“Tell you or show you? - you reply back, running your fingers through his hair and then brushing off the back of his neck.
“I’m a visual learner.”
With the cue, you caress his lower lip, leaning in and then facing away, teasing him.
A smirk from you doesn’t go unnoticed by your man, which he mirrors and shakes his head to.
“You know, it doesn’t make sense for you to play hard to get after coming to me dressed like this.” - he claims, biting his lip as his eyes glance at your body.
Zoro raises an eyebrow, at your next remark.
“Sorry, i keep getting distracted.”
You like the expression on his face. There’s frustration but love, eagerness but also resistance. Normally you wouldn’t continue teasing him like this but you know he likes it.
“Don’t worry, I’ll keep you focused for some time.”
It’s not long till he grabs your cheeks with one hand while the other caresses your thigh and pushes you closer so your lips meet passionately. His tongue dominates yours and he kisses like he was sucking the soul out of your body. The taste of alcohol on his mouth, his heavy breathing and those subtle but harsh touches were making you go insane.
His hand travels down to your upper part of the dress, lowering it with one pull thus revealing your bare chest. He gazes upon it before grabbing it with a hand, squeezing those boobs together before devouring them in his mouth.
Seeing you dressed like this, although not admitting it, must have turned him on like crazy. Your moans only add to his excitement as you push your head back, breathily calling his name.
“Zoro…- you clench your hand to his shirt, keeping yourself balanced.
“Ima bout to take you to the best adventure you’ve had in your life.”
This said, his hands take a strong grip on your waist, grabbing it good before picking you up and making you sit on the table, parting your legs and looking intensely at your eyes.
Zoro pulls you in by grabbing your legs, touching his forehead with yours as he whispers:
“Damnit, you’re so sexy right now I’m barely holding myself together.”
Ace:
“Dressed like that, the only adventure you’ll take me is inside you.”
You get all flustered as he scans you from head to toe, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed.
“Not to mention, now I feel underdressed.” - he claims chuckling, as he pushes his body forward to approach you. Ace looks down on you, seeing your body from a perspective he didn’t imagine before. The way your dressed fit with your curves and just the fact that you looked so hot in it made his body go all ‘code red’ whilst standing in close proximity, but not putting any hands on you yet.
“Well, it won’t matter anyways, - you reply, making the first move by caressing his chest. - you’ll get it off me faster than I put it on.”
“I see you came with clear expectations. - he replies, touching the hand you were caressing his chest with and lending a kiss to the palm. - what can I do for you, beautiful? You want an adventure?”
Your expression softens, as small romantic gestures that he did always left you in awe. But you’re no fool because it is known very welll by both of you what happens soon after and how that softness turns into grabbing the bed sheets.
“Kiss me, please.” - your voice sounds desperate which makes Ace grin.
“So needy today ~
His lips are inviting yours in a way that’s never happened before. He presses them delicately at first only to go absolutely feral after. Feels so perfect that even his head movements are in sync with yours, like dancing a fierce tango. He’s too eager, too hungry and too demanding. You’d swear you felt his tongue going down your throat as his hands are placed so well at your lower back, sliding down slowly.
“Ace… - you moan after finally catching your breath. Meanwhile, this man can’t stand without doing something that drives you crazy and you loved him for that.
He manages to get his hands under your dress, squeezing your ass like it was the only thing he wanted to hold on in this life. Ace comes back with more passionate kisses and touches second after second, making you unable to think, thus you just surrender to him completely.
“Dressed all pretty for me, - he says, pushing you a bit backwards, pinning you against the nearest wall. - you deserve a good reward, don’t ya?”
As your back hits the wall, Ace wastes no time in grabbing your legs and pushing them up to his waist. The dress no matter how sexy, still prevented him from feasting his eyes at you. A smirk appears on your eyes whilst biting your lip as you hang onto him shoulders.
He starts unzipping the front of your dress, turned on even more by looking at your expression filled of burning lust, showing unconsciously how much you wanted him.
“Let’s do some adventuring, shall we?”
1K notes · View notes
4wkjun · 5 months
Text
merry christmas, i guess | sjy
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: jake sim × reader
requested? yes! there you go, anon <3 i fucked up and lost the request, i’m so sorry ㅠㅠ
genre: smut
warnings: blowjob inside of a car, swearing, throat fucking (?), minors dni.
♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡
you envy people who had snow during christmas. living in australia was great – not that you knew anything different than that –, but it was so hot.
it was almost two in the morning when you and jake decided to leave the christmas party your friends decided to throw. the windows were down as the cool breeze hit your face and you pulled the hem of your dress a little up, feeling your thighs sticking together because of the thin layer of sweat on your skin.
“you hot?” jake smirked, his hand on your thigh.
“yeah, i hate the summer.”
jake hummed, caressing your soft skin. he hated himself for being turned on just by the sight of your bare thighs and the soft feeling of your skin against his palm. you barely had time alone, your mom over the two of you everytime jake visited you at your place. he missed feeling your skin against his, but could’t bring himself to say that to you. you’ve been together for only three months, he didn’t want to sound like a perv.
“a penny for your thoughts?” you said, caressing his hand on your thigh. jake took a deep breath and squeezed your thigh, shaking his head.
“maybe i should keep them to myself” he answered, smiling softly at you for only a second before turning his eyes back on the road.
“your dick begs do differ” you said, noticing his bulge starting to show through his jeans. jake groaned, his hand back on the wheel. “i’m sorry we haven’t fuck in two weeks” you said, your hand hovering his crotch.
jake almost threw the car across the road as you squeezed his hardening cock, gasping. he looked at you with wide eyes, his cheeks bright red.
“you don’t have to do this, y/n. it’s ok, you have a lot to deal right now and- fuck” he whimpered as your palm started to rub him through the jeans, ridiculously slowly. “don’t do this or i’ll shove the car in the middle of a tree!” jake said, desperate.
you laughed, leaning in to whisper in his ear: “stop the car.”
jake obeyed, pulling over on the freeway. there was no other cars, just yours, so jake didn’t even bother to look for a hidden spot.
“y/n...” he started, his hands urgent to get rid of the seat belt.
“shh, let me give you a christmas gift” you smiled, getting rid of yours too. your hands unbuttoned his pants, jake panting in anticipation.
“you’re so pretty” jake said, his hand pulling your hair behind your ear. you smiled before tapping his leg so he would help you, getting up to bring his jeans down. you pulled both his jeans and his underwear down at once, jake hissing while you released his half-hard cock.
jake threw his head back when your hand closed around his shaft, pumping him slowly and spreading his precum. he held his breath when you put your head down to spit over his tip, making your hands slide easily.
“god, i missed your touch” he said under a breath, his eyes focusing on your face. his cheeks were getting redder, his eyes completely dark, filled with lust. he leaned in to kiss your soft lips, moaning against your mouth everytime your hand circled his sensitive tip. “are you gonna ride me?” he asked – his voice shaking – when he broke the kiss to moan, his eyes closed.
“no, baby. this is your gift, remember?” you said softly before lowering your head towards his hard cock. jake whined when he felt your breath against his cock, holding his breath when you licked his tip.
“don’t mess with me, baby” he groaned, his hand instinctively on your head. you hummed, your lips circling his tip with eager.
jake moaned loudly when you bobbed your head down his shaft, your hand still pumping the part your mouth couldn’t reach. he slowly applied a little pressure on the back of your head, trying to get you to suck on more of him. you took a deep breath before going down, afraid you would gag around him.
“uh, that’s it baby” jake moaned, holding your hair so he could see your face going down on him. “you take me so well” he said before whining when you sucked your cheeks in, your eyes closed. you slowly bobbed your head again, trying to put more of him inside your mouth.
jake's hips bucked forward without his consent, his body working on his own. you gagged as his tip brushed against the back of your throat, tears automatically filling the corner of your eyes. jake let out a loud moan and his hands grabbed a fistful of your hair, not wanting you to back out.
“baby, please” he whined.
you tried taking a deep breath through your nose before letting his tip hit your throat again, wanting jake to feel good. you couldn’t help but make another gagging sound around his cock and jake hissed, his hazed eyes never leaving your face.
“you don’t have to do this” he managed to moan, his breathing completely irregular. you lifted your head, letting off of his cock with a loud pop. tears ran down your cheeks and your hand didn’t stop pumping him.
“i thought you’d like to fuck my mouth” you said with a hoarse voice, wiping your tears with the back of your other hand. jake’s cock twitched in your hand by the thought of fucking your mouth.
“i would love to” he moaned. “but you don’t have to-”
“stop saying that, i want you to cum inside of my mouth. would ya?” you said, pumping him faster. he whimpered, nodding non-stop. you smiled, taking a deep breath again before attaching your lips to his cock.
you could tell jake was trying to go easy on you, thrusting softly against your mouth, his tip barely touching the back of your throat. he knew he was your first boyfriend, your first everything. no one else has ever fucked your mouth before, he didn’t want this to be traumatic in anyway. however, when you hollowed your cheeks again and put your own head forward, he groaned before thrusting hard against you.
you couldn’t stop the gagging sounds from leaving your mouth as jake thrusted against you, the tip of your nose touching his pelvis. tears streamed freely down your face as jake chased his own high on your lips, desperate to cum.
“fuck, y/n” he whined. you could feel his thighs flexing underneath your hands – you needed any kind of support –, knowing he wouldn’t last long. “look at you, a gagging mess around my cock” he said, pushing your head down on him. you gagged loudly again and he moaned just as loud.
you could feel your arousal dripping down your thighs, desperate to make him cum – and maybe ask him to return the favor. your right hand reached his balls and he whined, bucking harder against your mouth. you moaned, vibrating his cock with your voice.
“i’mma cum, i’mma cum” he whined, fucking your throat non-stop in erratic thrusts, his hips bucking on their own again. when jake released his seed inside of your mouth, you tried your best to swallow while still sucking his sensitive cock, only stopping when he whined and tried to get you out of his cock.
you smiled, cleaning your mouth with the back of your hand, not knowing if jake would want to kiss you right now. obviously he wanted to, pulling you in to attach his lips on yours, his tongue capturing his own taste on yours. jake wanted to return the favor, eat you out until you passed out of pleasure.
“let me do this for you, baby?” he asked before leaning in to kiss your neck. you whined, embarrassed.
“you have to drop me off, it’s half past two...” jake laughed, his hand sliding through your dress to squeeze your ass. he smiled when he noticed you weren’t wearing underwear.
“don’t worry, i’ll make sure you come” he said, chuckling at his own joke. “go to the backseat, baby. i’ll make you feel good. merry christmas, i guess.”
576 notes · View notes
cozymaples · 5 months
Text
good vibrations! (mike schmidt x reader)
contains: use of vibrator, afab!reader, praises, body image issues briefly mentioned for reader but it's literally like a two second thing and nothing specific!!
Tumblr media
mike has your head on his shoulder, lulled back and staring at yourself in the mirror in front of you. your eyes are hazy, and your arm is reached behind you, wrapping around his neck to hold him against the side of your face. he watches, too, jaw slack at the sight in front of him. you're both sat at the edge of your bed, your legs spread, sitting in front of mike. you lean back into his chest, and his arm wraps around your middle, holding you snugly against him. your lips are parted, panting as you feel the vibrator he's holding against your clit.
"lean into the feeling, baby." he encourages. "let your brain shut off."
it's hard for you to be this vulnerable, especially when you're staring at what makes you so insecure in the first place. it was hard for you to be fully in the moment with mike whenever the two of you were intimate. having body image issues was unfortunately the price mike had to pay when he decided to start dating you. not that he minded, of course. what he minded was that you minded.
he'd noticed here and there that you'd turn your head to the side when you finished, trying to coax you to look back at him while his cock rammed inside of you, but to no avail. you'd had futile conversations about it, resulting with you shutting him down completely. "i don't know," you'd murmur to him, avoiding eye contact. whenever he asked, you'd start pacing around the house, trying to find a chore to keep busy with. “it’s not a big deal, mike.” your tone was less than pleasant, and he’d reached his hands up defensively. his patience had been wearing thin, a plethora of other things on his mind besides this.
why wouldn’t you let him fuck you the way you deserved?
so now you’re here, spread open for him, his own legs wrapping around your calves to keep you that way. every muscle in your body is wound tightly, and the vibrator he has pressed against your clit isn’t helping. “tell me why, or i won’t let you cum.” he says, watching you both in the mirror. normally you’d fight him on it, but he’s been edging you for close to twenty minutes now, and you’re desperate for an orgasm.
“jus’wanna be pretty for you,” you slur through moans. his expression changes, just slightly, but you’ve caught it. “pretty for me?” he repeats, and you nod. the arm he’s holding around your waist tugs you in closer, moving his lips to the shell of your ear. “you’re the prettiest.” he says, pressing kisses just below your ear. your head is still lulled back, jaw slack as you stare at your reflection. he finally switches the vibrator to a higher setting, and your knees buckle.
“how could you ever think you weren’t pretty?” he asks, but you can’t respond. you’re panting softly, fingers tugging at his hair for more stabilization. his head is buried in the crook of your neck, sucking kisses into the flesh. “always think you’re the prettiest. know it, even.” he says, and you see stars.
“mike-“ you warn, knowing you’re orgasm is approaching. “i know, i know.” he soothes, “want you to. want you to so badly. look at yourself.” he instructs, and you do. you can’t believe it at first, but you actually look..beautiful. your stray hairs are sticking to your face, held in place by the thin layer of sweat you’ve produced. your body has been working overtime to harbor your pleasure, making sure you don’t lose it. your cheeks are rosy, flushed with need and vulnerability. your lips are cherried, and eyes hazy with lust, your lids half open and hooded-and you finally realize; this is what he’s been trying to show you all along.
“prettiest i’ve ever seen,” he says, and it sends you over the edge. your lips are parted, gasping through your orgasm as moans spill tirelessly from your mouth. you’re tugging at his hair, and clenching around nothing. he holds you steady through your high, anchoring you.
you try to catch your breath, and he presses kisses to your neck, over and over. as the moment passes, he grows more serious. “how could you ever think that?” he asks, softly. you shrug, finally turning to look at him, not just at his reflection. “just didn’t see myself the way you do,” you reply. he laughs softly, pressing his lips to yours as he cups your face.
“guess we won’t have that problem anymore,” he says, and you nod.
“never.”
479 notes · View notes
deaddovedecadence · 6 months
Text
Title: Puppies
Warning(s): manipulation, yandere shit, yelling
Summery: after a fight with bruce, duke brings you a gift (but not is all that is seems to be)
Bruce is a dick when he’s angry, but he never yells and that’s the worst part. He takes, takes everything that you are and makes you feel so small, and sometimes you think that this is what Jason run, because if he had to deal with this when he was young then why wouldn’t he.
You’ve curled up in your bathroom, the room door that locks, and you’ve rested yourself against it, not thinking about how you’re breaking another rules because there are so many rules and you always seem to fuck up even on the days that you're trying to be good. There is not good enough for them, there is nothing you can do to get your freedom because they are all faster, stronger, smarter then you are. They've done a millions times and you've never been held hostage and been told that it's for love.
this is nopt love, this is possession and you do not want possession. Does freedom even exist for you, made something that you didn't used to be by them, because of them.
"Hey," there's a voice from outside the door, pulling you away from the spiral that you've sunken into. You don't respond to the voice even though you know that it's just Duke, Duke the only person not to raise his hands againt you, never cruel, always patient, always kind. It was with him that you meant to go on a outing with but now, you don't want to leave this bathroom, because at least it is safe in the bathroom.
There's a soft rapping sound and Duke sighs, "I heard that Bruce lost his mind, huh? That probably really sucked." He's making an understatement and you both know it but Duke is gentle anyways, (a predator) coaxing you out of your hiding spot. "Tell me what happened and I'll give you a surprise." he says, and Duke's surprises are always good so you start.
"I didn't know that bruce didn't know about our outing," you whisper, "i was waiting on the front step and he saw and he lost it. Duke, am I really nothing without you?" There's a hissed out sigh from Duke, "You know that Bruce gets anxious about us, right? Specially you an Jase cause you're new and Jase is fresh home. He didn't mean to." You know that and yet, it's not enough right now. "I told you what happened," you snap, "so give me my surprise now."
Your (not a) brother laughs, "only if you unlock the door and come out.” You unlock the door, slowly opening it. It’s duke and he’s holding something, well two something’s actually. He’s holding what look like twin Rottie puppies and they’re so cute. “I thought you’d like to have someone besides me and Jase. You take one of them and coo and it. “Whats their name?” You mumble, holding the puppy tight across your chest. “I thought it might be funny to name them Shadow and sunshine. I’d take shadow, she’s a girl, and you could have sunshine, he’s a boy .” You croon and Sunshine with his black fur and bright blue eyes. “They’re perfect. thank you duke.”
Duke smiles, “and because they are puppies, we get to go to training together so more outings.” You grin at him, crooning at the say that sunshine yawns. “Can he sleep here?” You murmur, and Duke nods.
“Thank you Duke,”
“Welcome Sunshine.”
-
Bruce is getting some work done with his son storms into his office, eyes glowing in way that they only do when he’s angry. “What’s wrong?” he says, and Duke hisses, that sound more animal then anything a normal human could make.
“You really had to fuck up all my progress with them? I got sunshine to the point of not wanting to escape and you nearly ruined all that because you’re scared.” Bruce stands, staring at duke. “I did not know,” he snaps, “I did not know and I didn’t mean to.”
His son laughs, the sound cold. “I know that but that doesn’t mean you ruin all my fuckin progress with Sushine cause you a paranoid motherfucker.” Some of Duke’s gotham is slipping into his accent as he speaks, never yelling but obvious furious. There’s a knock on the door, and Dick slips in, looking at the two of them before sighing, “just go spar it out and you’ll feel better.” Duke slips out of the room, tiling his head in a way that means follow so bruce follows.
Author’s note: Duke is such a scary yandere to me bc this man really be bending you in ways that you can’t even notice. Yes the dog was a plot to get you to stay with them and not run. Duke genuinely does not care what he has to do to protect his family and I think that he’s so real for that /j
735 notes · View notes
evera-era · 8 months
Text
heal me.
there’s a new medic in town, and ellie williams is about to find out who she is.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
ellie williams x fem!reader, pt 2 here
warnings: fluff, mention of cuts/wounds, medical setting, suggestive themes. wc 1.3k
a/n: first time writing an ellie fic! if this does well i might post a second + third part <3
Ellie hated anything to do with doctors. She could take care of herself perfectly fine, she swears. But Dina witnessed her earning a nasty gash during a patrol, and wouldn’t shut up about it unless she got it checked out.
Word was that there was a new medic in town. Ellie’s pretty sure she’s seen you around Jackson. Walking around in those dumb white clothes, tending to everyone who needed you.
You’ve seen her too. Sneaking glances anytime you could. I mean, Ellie was pretty, and it was no big deal, right?
That is, until a flash of auburn hair ducks into the med clinic, and you nearly jump out of your skin.
Ellie clears her throat. “Uh… you guys are pretty much done for the night, right?”
She’s hoping you would say yes so she could just go back home and rest. Watch a movie, maybe. Have everyone fuck off and leave her alone.
You nod, clicking your pen, when you notice her clutching her side. “But I’ve got time for one more.”
You were on call, anyway, so your shift was never really over.
Fuck, she thinks. Ellie has always had trouble asking for help. She could take care of herself just fine. It didn’t help that you were so nice — nauseatingly so — but she figures that’s why you’re the town medic and she’s not.
“Follow me,” You add, motioning her over to the first room on the left. Even though meds were hard to come by, bandages were plentiful, and you weren’t gonna pass up the opportunity to tend to your crush.
Totally innocent crush.
“So, what was it?” You ask, eyes scanning over the girl as she takes a place on the edge of the hospital bed.
“Some fuckers we ran into, lone group. Nothing too serious... think they were looking to steal shit.” Ellie mutters. “But one took a swing at me and I fell on something sharp. My friend’s been bugging me to come here, get it checked out.”
Your conversation pauses as you take her vitals. Everything is in a normal range.
“The group…” You break the silence, looking down. “Are they a concern?”
“They’re gone, if that’s what you’re asking.”
You felt a light blush rise on your cheeks. Ellie was so strong, and brave. It showed, even in the way she just talks about her patrols.
You flit your eyes back up, trying to refocus. “So can I see? The wound?”
“Oh. Right.” Ellie’s fingers dip down to grab the hem of her shirt, and pull up. For a moment, you only see her toned stomach. You try not to get distracted.
Then you see the bandage under her ribcage.
Your fingers are gentle when they graze over the gauze. It’s a barrier, but Ellie swears it’s like you’re touching her directly. You move to peel it off of her.
Ellie absentmindedly sucks her breath in through her teeth. You whisper a small apology.
“It’s not… bad right?” She says after a moment. “I mean, I’ve had worse.”
She made a mental note to get onto Dina. This whole thing made her look like a fucking pussy.
“I’m sure you have,” You smile meekly, examining the cut. “No… not bad.”
After washing off your hands, you pull up a chair in front of Ellie. She watches you carefully as you sigh.
“Won’t need stitches, and no signs of infection.” You add. “But I can at least disinfect it and send you off with some new dressing.”
“I mean, it’s fine, I can—“
“No, let me.” You say quickly, cutting off her retort. “You’re already here, right?”
Ellie opens her mouth, then closes it. You had a point. She merely nods instead.
You reach down for the bucket of clean water. When you come back up, you notice Ellie has removed her shirt completely. The only thing clinging to her upper body is a flimsy sports bra.
“Oh,” You all but whisper accidentally.
“Hm?”
“Nothing.”
The rag becomes stained as you wipe the area. A few swishes, and the water in the bucket has turned a cloudy mahogany.
“So… your friend,” You add. “Was it Dina?”
Ellie raises her eyebrows slightly. “Uh, yeah. Yeah.”
“She must really care about you.” You say quietly. It takes Ellie a moment to realize what you’re implying. She’s quick to answer.
“Oh, yeah. Not like that anymore, though. It’s… just friends now.”
You take that as confirmation that their relationship ended. And even though in a way you were happy to find out Ellie is now single, it would be rude not to apologize.
“Oh.” You mumble. “Sorry.”
She looks down. “It’s cool.”
You disinfect the wound with some alcohol before applying new dressing with gentle fingertips. You smile up at the brunette.
“Good as new.”
She feels herself smiling back. She wants to kick herself; she didn’t even wanna be here in the first place. But now it doesn’t feel like a mistake after all.
“Thanks,” She says. Her gaze has softened.
You grab something out of the cabinet. Ellie realizes it’s fresh bandages when you outstretch your hand to her.
“So, just… use these. Every couple hours, change it out, till it scabs over. If you ever need more you know where to get it.”
Ellie knows this. But she realizes that she likes hearing you talk, so she thinks of something else to ask.
“Uh, and how do I know what to look for? If I have an infection?”
“Oh,” You say. “Here, lay back. I’ll show you.”
Something about the way you’re hovering over Ellie has her stomach fluttering. You were so tentative. Why hadn’t she tried to talk to you sooner?
“Gotta check it everytime you change your dressing. If it smells weird, or feels hot…”
Your fingers trace over her body yet again. Her eyes are stuck on you, the way your hair falls into your face. The way your lips move to explain everything. Not to mention how soft your skin felt on hers.
She thought the whole “hot nurse” trope was something that only happened in movies. It was pretty clear now that she was wrong.
“Got it?”
“What?”
Shit. She wasn’t listening.
“Do you get it now?” You repeat, looking down at Ellie.
She blinks before propping herself up with her elbows. “Uh… yeah. Think so.”
You smile again, leaning back so you’re no longer positioned over her. You take your place against the counter.
Ellie didn’t hear a word. But she’ll make the effort now to be extra gentle with herself, because of you. If that’s worth anything.
Silence fills the room once again as Ellie pulls her shirt back over her head. You sneak in one last glimpse before she’s fully clothed.
“If something changes you can always come back and see me.” You add with a breathy laugh. “I’m in here, like, all the time.”
“Oh yeah?” She asks, looking up at you. “I’ll have to stop by again sometime, then.”
Your heart skips a beat. Is she trying to flirt with you? No, it’s probably nothing.
You clear your throat. “Hopefully not under these circumstances.”
“Right,” She says. Her eyes widen as she realized she’s extended her stay. “I’ll, um… I’ll go. Get out of your hair.”
Ellie’s never used that expression before. She nearly facepalms. So stupid.
But then you laugh a little, and it’s such a beautiful sound when it hits her ears.
“I don’t mind.” You add bashfully. “But… you need to rest and get better. Go back to kicking ass, all that stuff.”
Ellie feels her face wanting to turn red again. You were so sappy, and shameless with it. She wasn’t used to this kind of attention, really. She didn’t think people like you even existed at all anymore.
She merely hums, unable to find the right words to say. If she sticks around any longer, she might actually develop feelings for you as if she hasn’t already. So she opts to bid you goodbye.
“Well… see you around.”
You nod, watching her head for the door. You hold the clipboard to your chest in an effort to soften your heartbeat.
“Night, Ellie.”
— part two
862 notes · View notes
taestefully-in-luv · 2 years
Text
Rule #5 | JJK (2/2)
Tumblr media
Summary: You strike up a fwb deal with your childhood friend Jungkook after kissing him one night after a dare. But you have rules…5 of them to be exact and it seems Jungkook doesn’t want to follow any of them.
Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader
Genre: fwb au, friends to lovers, fluff, maybe a little angst (barely), SMUT
Word Count: 22k (twc:42k)
Warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, bit of jealous!jk, jk is a little dry with oc, mentions of discomfort & vulnerability, lots of discussion over ‘control’, open communication :], Taehyung is a meddler. Okay…smut warnings: so much kissing (cute & sloppy), lots of teasing, teasing use of the word ‘slut’, technically switch!oc and switch!jk, finger sucking, dirty talk and comm in general, lingerie (tearing of it too), jk is demanding but so soft, use of restraints and blindfold, boners, vaginal fingering, oral (fem rec), overstimulation, edging, multiple orgasms, multiple orgasm denials, cum eating, clit slapping, cream pie (?), protected sex, rougher with multiple positions. But still so soft. Oc describes feeling of vulnerability during sex. (positive)
© tastefully-in-luv
Part One
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It’s over an hour into this double date and you aren’t having a horrible time. Not an amazing time…but not a horrible time. You can see Ara is clearly into the guy across from her, he is handsome and seems to be pretty funny. Even you’ve laughed quite a bit at his playful banter with Ara.
Now, the guy across from you is not as outgoing as Ara’s date. He’s almost intimidatingly handsome, sharp eyes that come across off as judgmental. But you realized the judgmental one is you because as soon as he talks he is soft spoken and kind. He’s just a bit shy.
Chul, Ara’s date is sharing a few stories about a disastrous holiday work party last year. You and Ara both cracking up when Ren, your date, chimes in. “I just hope this year isn’t as bad.” 
“Well, maybe it won’t be if these two wonderful ladies accompany us.” He winks at Ara who just rolls her eyes, but you can see the blush on her cheeks.
“It’s summer.” She points out, “You’re already trying to plan for something so many months in advance?”
“Is it bad to be that hopeful?” Chul eyes Ara innocently and you can’t help but snort but you quickly cover your mouth.
“Sorry, sorry.” You conceal a smile, “I didn’t mean to make that sound.”
“It’s okay.” Ren chuckles quietly, “Chul really is that hopeful.” Then he leans over the table a little, eyes on you. “He’s been talking about Ara nonstop since they started chatting.”
“Oh.” You glance at Ara who is giggling to something else Chul said, “It seems like they’re hitting it off then.”
“Yeah.” Ren takes a look at the other two as well before whispering, “Should we give them some space?” 
You turn your head back to Ren with wide eyes and then decide maybe he’s right so you nod. He smiles as he stands up and gestures towards the bar instead of the table you four are currently occupying, “We can grab another drink.”
You stand as well and you both make it to the bar top and take a seat at the stools, “I don’t think they even noticed that we left.” You laugh.
“Highly doubt it.” Ren shakes his head gently, “He was nervous to come by himself, honestly. So he asked me to come too.” Then his eyes expand, “But I mean, after seeing your photo it’s not like he had to force me.”
You giggle at this, “It’s okay. I get it.” 
He relaxes, “If I’m being honest with you…I’m kind of going through a break up.”
“Ah really?” You tilt your head, “Rough breakup?”
“Yes and no.” He sighs out, smile tugging at his lips. “It was clean and mutual but for some reason that’s what’s making it feel so rough.” He laughs. “Sorry, probably not the topic of conversation you are wanting to have.”
“Can I be honest too?” You show him a crooked smile and he nods. “I wasn’t necessarily thrilled about going on a double date. Like, in general.” You decide to clarify, “Nothing against you, of course. I’m also helping out a friend.” And he nods in understanding since he’s doing the same thing. “But it feels strange for some reason. Being here.”
“Strange?” He lifts his brows in concern, “Did I do something?”
You’re quick to wave your hands around, shaking your head. “No. No.”
“Then?”
“Fine, I’ll tell you but you cannot tell anyone.” You chuckle to yourself, “Well, not Ara, anyway.”
Ren eyes you curiously, “Are you seeing someone else?” He guesses almost correctly.
“Yes and no.” You repeat his answer from earlier. “It’s complicated but not complicated.” You shrug now, “I have a friends with benefits?” 
“That’s a question?” He grins at you. “But wow, good luck with that.”
“Good luck?” You ask, amused.
“Yeah.” He nods. “I mean, unless your relationship is strictly the benefits and hardly friends then I guess it could work.”
You blink at him before your cheeks heat up and you frown, “He’s one of my best friends actually. Not to mention my friend since we were kids. Super close.”
“Then I will emphasize my ‘good luck’ because you’ll need it.” He chuckles. “Be prepared for chaos.”
“Actually that’s highly unlikely.” You say confidently. “We have rules in place. So things don’t get chaotic. Everything is under control.”
“Rules?” He raises a single brow, “Which are?”
“Well,” You look up, trying to recall the rules. “First one is that we can’t tell anyone and the sec—”
“—Didn’t you just break the first rule?” He snorts, “No offense, but I don’t feel confident in your other rules now. You’re probably breaking those too.”
“Wow,” You look at him, surprised. “How dare you call me out? I thought you were shier than this?”
“Well, considering we’ve been honest about why we’re here, I feel more comfortable” He smiles at you.
“So comfortable that you can tease me like that?” You laugh, “But you’re the first person I’ve told!”
“Regardless of your other rules,” Ren softens, “Going out on a date feels strange? Are you not overthinking yet? You know, the ‘why’?” 
“Why would I?” You ask and Ren studies you for a moment. He doesn’t know you like that but why do you look so genuine, like you really don’t understand.
“How would you feel if he was out right now? With someone else?”
“Like on a date?”
“Yeah.”
“He wouldn’t.” You shrug, “He—”
“—Maybe that’s why you aren’t overthinking it.” He realizes, “Because you feel like you don’t have to worry about him getting busy with someone else. And this double date doesn’t have meaning for you so what’s to overthink, huh?” He chews on his bottom lip, “But does he know you’re here? How would he feel?”
“He…” You pause, trying to really think about it. Well, he wouldn’t mind. Just a week ago you were both going to hook up with other people. He doesn’t get jealous. He doesn’t care. “He wouldn’t care.” You finally say, “He would probably brush it off.” 
“Because he knows the context or because he doesn’t care if you see someone else?” Ren questions you, small grin. “Because those are two different things. And if he finds out, do you think he will assume the context? That you’re just here for you friend. Or will he assume you’re wanting to see other people?” 
“Why do I feel like I’m speaking to a therapist?” You joke.
Ren laughs, apology in his eyes. “Sorry, sorry. It’s easier to focus on someone else’s problems instead of my own.” 
“Oh, right. Your clean but rough break up.” 
“Exactly. Together two years but going on different paths.”
“Ah,” You nod in understanding. “Aka, you’re still in love but the logical decision is to part ways.”
“Exactly.” Ren looks shy again. “What’s the saying? Right person wrong time?” 
“I guess they say that for a reason.”
“I feel like we should probably order a drink now.” Ren chuckles, “And don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”
~
It’s a little after 9 when the double date comes to an end. Ara is definitely giving you the look. She’s totally going to spend more time with Chul so you give her a hug and wave bye to the two men. Ren was super nice the entire evening. You two continued to talk at the bar but it’s clear there isn’t anything there between you both. You’re relieved he wasn’t interested either.
Once in your car you try to decide what to do—go home or call Jungkook. You’re honestly proud but upset with yourself, for yesterday. You loved teasing him but his offer to finger you quickly in his closet also sounded tempting and nothing feels better than Jungkook making you come. 
You won’t lie…you feel a little needy and getting touched by Jungkook sounds like the perfect Saturday night. Plus, you kind of wore what you’re wearing for a purpose. You perhaps planned ahead—you’re wanting to see Jungkook. Pulling out your phone from your bag, you find Jungkook’s name and press ‘call’. It’s ringing and ringing and you think he won’t answer. Maybe he’s busy? Then Ren’s words from earlier make you stomach do its usual twisting. No, he wouldn’t be out with someone else.
“Hello?” He finally answers. He’s quiet and his voice came out in a mumble. Maybe he was asleep..
“Hey.” You respond, “Were you sleeping?”
“No.” He says simply. “What’s up?” Still mumbling.
“Well,” You press the phone harder to your ear, his voice is too quiet. “Are you busy?”
“Nah.” 
“Okay…” You say slowly, “Want to hang out?”
He silent on the other end, soft breaths barely even heard. “Hello?” You check to see if he’s still there. “Jungkook?”
“What?” He asks with a bite to his voice. “What’s up?”
“No, I was just seeing if you wanted to hang out, jeez, never mind then.” You respond equally annoyed.
“No, wait.” He sighs out, “Sorry, I was just—sure, you can come here if you want.” He tells you.
“If I want?” You frown to yourself, “I’ll only go if it’s what you want.”
“You’re so annoying, y/n.” He kind of laughs to himself but it’s distant. “Yeah, I want you to come over.” 
“Hmm,” You try to tease him, it sounds like he’s in a bad mood. Maybe he had a long day. “I don’t know.” You hum. “Should I?”
“Yeah,” He tells you dryly.
You try to brush it off, “Okay, well, I’m actually nearby so I’ll be there in like ten.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.” You take a breath, “See you soon.”
“Just let yourself in.” He says before hanging up.
Well, okay. You’re wondering if he had to go into work today and it was long and stressful…hopefully seeing you could make him feel a little better. He can get moody sometimes so it’s not like you aren’t used to it. But it always sucks when he’s dry with you.
Before you know it, you’re entering his apartment. It’s dark inside, all of the lights turned off in the living room as well as the kitchen. Once you’ve slipped your shoes off you start walking towards the back, a soft glow coming from the long hallway where his bedroom is located. You get closer to his bedroom, his door only cracked open, where the only light in his apartment is spilling through.
You gently push it open and see Jungkook laying on his bed, propped up on the pillows while he scrolls through his phone. His eyes lift from his phones screen and checks you out shamelessly but he keeps his face neutral.
“Nice dress. New?” He asks before his eyes go back to his phone.
“Oh.” You look down at your outfit.  A black dress that falls right above your knees, it hugs your body in all the right ways with a revealing neckline. “Yeah, I was shopping around before I came over yesterday.” You tell him.
“Right.” He answers, eyes on his phone. “Cool.”
“Yeah.” You say the word slowly, eyeing him as you continue to stand by the doorway. “Are you okay?”
Jungkook sighs before clicking his phone off and throwing his legs over the edge of the bed to sit up, “I’m great.” He says with a straight face.  “What about you?”
“I’m good.” You walk closer to the bed, hesitantly looking at the spot next to him before taking a seat. “You seem annoyed.” 
Jungkook chuckles dryly, “What, that’s crazy.” 
“Jungkook—”
“—But enough about me,” He turns his head towards you and smiles. “How was your date?”
Your eyebrows climb up your forehead in surprise, “Huh?” You blink at him. “How…how did you know about that?”
“Taehyung.” He keeps his eyes on you. “He mentioned it last night after you left.”
“Taehyung?” You look more confused.
“Ara told him, I guess.” He shrugs, “Anyway, how was it?”
“It—”
“—You look really nice. Bet the dude was all over you, huh?” His expression is completely unreadable but you’re trying to understand his annoyance. You can read into it that much.
“He wasn’t.” You furrow your brows, “It really—I’m sorry…” You shake your head just slightly. “Are you mad about this?” 
“Do I look happy?” He narrows his eyes. “You didn’t even tell me.”
“It wasn’t…I didn’t think it would matter?” You mumble, “I didn’t think it was something you’d mind?”
Jungkook’s eyes somehow narrow more, a look of disbelief on his face. “Seriously?”
“Yeah, seriously.” You answer, your own annoyance starting to build. “Why should—”
“You know what,” Jungkook releases a long puff of air, his eyes leaving yours to stare down at his lap. “I mean, you’re right. Why should I mind? It’s always been clear I have no control over you and what you do, who you see—”
“Oh my god,” You huff out, eyes rolling. “You realize controlling someone like that is bad, right?”
His eyes widen before he’s snapping his head to face you, “No, no. I know.” He rushes to say, “Not what I meant.”
“Then what do you mean?” 
“That,” He stares at you, his eyes are now doe like and innocent and you see some guilt swirling in them. “I don’t know.” He admits. 
“You don’t like that you didn’t know I was on a date with someone?” You ask him directly.
“Yeah, no, I did not like it.” He tells you honestly. “Not just that I didn’t know. I don’t like that you went out with someone in general.” 
“Oh.” You nod your head a little, trying to understand. He doesn’t look away from you, his eyes boring into yours and you stare back just as intently. 
You didn’t think he would care. Especially because this double date wasn’t like…it was literally meaningless and for Ara. But he doesn’t know that. You continue to look at him before softening, “Why?”
“I don’t know.” He tells you. “I’ve been sleeping with you for like 4 months now. Kind of hate the idea of sharing at this point.” He scoffs to himself before glancing down again, his voice gone quieter. “You make me feel like I don’t have any control over anything.” 
You frown a little at his words, “Jungkook…” Your hand goes to his thigh. “Last week you didn’t care though? If we—”
“—I knew damn well we weren’t actually going to hook up with anyone else.” He cuts in, looking dejected.
“Oh.”
“I might not be cut out for this kind of arrangement.” He tells you, eyes still on his lap. “I thought I was but finding out you were out with someone else made me feel like…” He looks back up, contemplating his words. “Like you’re just playing with me.” 
You push your head back, confusion on your features. “I’m not.” You say quickly. “God, I would never—”
“—I know.” He cuts you off, “But I’m so into what we do but you aren’t satisfied with me?” He looks hurt as he asks that. “You feel the need to—” “—No.” You squeeze his thigh. “It wasn’t a real date or anything. It was just for Ara…the guy and I both made it clear we weren’t interested in one another. Seriously, Jungkook.” You gaze at him, trying to get your words across. “I’m telling the truth.”
“Not a real…date?” He questions you, “Then why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t think to say anything because it was barely on my mind!” You lean into him, “Seriously, Jungkook. I don’t want you to feel like I’m not enjoying this.” You squeeze his thigh again. “I am. More than anything else right now.”
He raises a brow at you, his expression looking less serious. “Yeah?” 
“Yes.” You nod. “So…” You start nibbling on your lips, feeling anxious now. “Don’t say something like you aren’t cut out for this…we’re having fun, right? You’re enjoying it too, right?”
He looks wary to answer for a moment. 
“Jungkook?”
“Yeah.” He blurts, “I am but I think this whole day I had a different mindset and it kind of fucked with me.” Jungkook admits, “I really don’t want to share what we’re doing with anyone else. Is that unfair? Plus, it’s safer that way…” He glances to the side, “But I just feel like I have no reigns over you.” 
You stare at him before your lips curve into a subtle smirk, “Is this because you want to make me feel I only belong to you, Jungkook?” 
He look taken aback, head already shaking. “I told you, I’m not saying I want to—”
“Do you want to make yours tonight then?” You ask, your voice calm, which only makes him more nervous.
“What are you talking about?” He whispers, brows pinched together.
“You feel like you have no sense of control when you’re with me, right?” 
“Okay…” He says slowly.
“Then I’ll give you the control.” Your hand leaves his thigh. “Tonight.”
He leans in a little, eyes boring into yours before he softens, “That’s what you mean…” He pauses. “No.”
“No?”
“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“There’s always going to be a little discomfort when it comes to vulnerability.” You tell him. “But it’s not like I haven’t fantasized about it. You’re the only one who comes to mind too, when I think about something like that.” You look off to the side, feeling a little embarrassed for admitting that. You aren’t sure you’re a fan of giving up the control to someone else but when you fantasize when you’re alone, the thought of Jungkook makes your body set itself on fire.  
Jungkook is quiet as he stares at you, his eyes studying your face with such intensity. “You want to let me have my way with you?” He asks in a whisper. “You want me to be in charge of your pleasure?” 
“Believe it or not, but you’ve been in charge of my pleasure for a while.” Your eyes go back to him.
“How so?” He looks down at your lips before going back to your eyes. 
“Since you’re the reason for it.” You give a small shrug, “No one else has been a reason for so long.” 
“Ah, right.” He smiles, “Around 4 months, huh?”
“Something like that.” You admit and his brows pull together before you speak again. “Don’t overthink that.”
“You want to be mine tonight?” He asks, genuinely. “Because if you give me that permission…god, are you really letting me have that kind of power, y/n?” 
“I’m giving you tonight.” You say. “To do whatever you want with me. I’ll be good for you. Just like how you want.” You have a teasing glint in your eye. Like you’re mocking him but you’re also so serious.
His fingers go to your jaw, “You’re always good for me, baby. Believe it or not.” Jungkook smirks and your stomach twists. Again. But the way your stomach is turning isn’t totally uneasy. It’s flopping and making you feel something so strange as it shakes up. You want to think it’s nerves but instead it feels like excitement. 
“What exactly do you want to do?” You lean into his touch.
“I want to see you like I’ve never seen you.” He leans in more, his lips ghosting yours. “I want to see you completely lost, completely gone, completely fallen apart. Completely mine.” 
“Why do you want me like that so badly?” You whisper against his lips, your eyes beginning to shut. 
“Because I’m the only one who will know that side of you, right?”
“You think no guy has ever had me—”
“—No.” He stops you from finishing that, his lips pressing against yours. He’s kissing you slow before pulling back, lips still brushing yours. “Because you only want me to have you, don’t you?”
You exhale a deep breath, your hands going to his neck, fingers gripping his hair as you push your lips against his. Kissing him while  breathy moans get shared between you both. You feel needy as you slip your tongue into his mouth, your fingers lost in his hair and an undeniable ache between your legs.
Jungkook’s hands are all over your waist and hips and finally one hands slips behind your neck as well as he deepens the kiss more passionately. He groans into your mouth when he feels how your hand slides down and you cup him over his sweats. He pulls away from you, breathless and you can’t help but look disappointed.
“You really want this?” he asks, eyes on you. “My way?”
“Yes.” You breathe out, “Fuck, yes. I want this, Jungkook—I want you, I want you so badly.”
“Tell me a word you’ll remember.”
“What?”
“A word. Safe word.”
“A safe…” You mumble, “Uh,”
“It’s just so I know if it’s too much, baby. I won’t do anything to hurt you.” His expression loses some of its lewdness as he stares at you. “I’d never do anything to make you uncomfortable, y/n. I just want you to feel good. But if it’s too much, I want you to tell me.”
“Then I’ll just tell you.” You say, “Who says I’ll remember a word if you’re making me fall apart for you, Jungkook.” 
“You’re talking like you know I will.” He smirks, lewd expression returning. 
“I know you will.” You bite your lips before speaking so slow, the teasing only continuing. “Do you want to fuck me like I’m your slut?”
Jungkook’s eyes widen at your words. Oh. You’re teasing him. Maybe even mocking but it’s working for him. He sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, taking his time to breathe. Fuck, you’re something else. “Would you let me?” a sly grin grows on his face. “Hm? Would you let me treat you,” His hand goes to your thighs where the dress rides up, his fingers inch closer to your core. You still, breath hitched as his fingers find the band of your underwear and he dips inside. “Like you’re mine?” Two fingers rub at your clit and he smirks at the wetness that’s pooled. “Someone who is dirty for me? Nasty?” He asks slowly with his deep voice before he’s pulling his hand away and putting his two fingers to your lips.
You glance down at his fingers before your big eyes go to his dark one. “You’re the one who wants me to fuck you like a slut yet you can’t suck on my fingers?” He teases you, softly nudging your lips apart. “I thought you said you’d be good for me, baby.”
You keep quiet, eyes still on him as you let his fingers push through your mouth. Your taste spreads instantly, your tongue recognizing your flavor. You finally lick at his fingers before sucking on them. 
“Do you taste good?” He asks you, “You look a little shy like this, y/n.” Jungkook pulls his fingers back, the wet digits outlining yours lips. “You’d rather taste my cum, huh?”
The corner of your lips lift before you answer, “I hope you’d let me.”
“Let you?” He quirks a brow, “There isn’t anything I wouldn’t let you do.”
“Okay.” Your hands go to his chest, before you lean forward and give him a simple kiss. “Then there is nothing I won’t let you do to me too.” You whisper against his lips, “In fact, I am hoping you do everything to me, Jungkook.” 
“If I’m lucky you’ll say something like that to me again.” He sighs out when your hand goes back to the bulge in his sweats. “And again.” He closes his eyes now. “And again.” You rub his erection over the clothing, the feeling of it hard beneath your palm. “All,” His breaths become more bated, “The fucking time.” 
“If I’m lucky,” You plant another kiss to his parted lips. “Then you’ll make me want to say it to you over and over.”
Jungkook releases a long breath before opening his eyes again, his fingers wrapping around your wrist, guiding your hand away from his body. “What are you wearing under this outfit of yours?”
“Something you’ll like.” You admit almost sheepishly, “It might have been a part of my shopping yesterday.”
“That I’ll like?” His eyes scan your figure, “Yet you wore it on your date?”
“Didn’t wear it for him.” You nudge your nose against his, “Not saying I’m wearing it for y—”
“—No, no…” Jungkook’s hands go to your waist, “I want you to tell me the truth. Did you wear it for me?”
“I’m just saying I know you’ll like it.” You lean away from him a little, eyes looking playful. 
“I’ll play along, babe.” Jungkook’s fingers go to your thighs again, his fingers riding up your dress even more, fingers working up your thigh when his expression shifts when he notices something. “But with how this night is going to go, I want you to know that you’ll be admitting every little thing you do that is to please me.” 
“You sound confi—”
“—I want you to take off your clothes. Leave on whatever it is you think I’ll like so much. And then lean back on the bed for me.” Jungkook’s hands leave your body and he’s standing from the bed. “I’ll be back.”
Your eyes follow him as he goes into his closet and you’re quickly standing as well. You go to unzip your dress, shrugging it off your shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. Leaving you in nothing but the lingerie you bought.
You look down at your body, fingers tugging on different parts of the lingerie because suddenly you’re feeling more nervous. Not bad nervous. Thrilled nervous. Your skin feels like it’s on fire, an undeniable warmth surrounding you but god, it feels exciting. You make your way onto Jungkook’s bed, propping yourself up as you lean back on his pillows. One leg down while the other is up, bent at the knee. Then you slide it back down. Then up again. Okay, maybe you are nervous, nervous.
Your eyes trail down your body again, making sure all the lace material is sticking to you in the right ways when you notice the closet light turning off and Jungkook is making his way out. His eyes are on his hands as he inspects the box he’s holding. He comes to the foot of the bed, “Okay,” He starts, “Took me a second to find what I was look—” He lifts his head to lock eyes with you but he’s lost the words he was wanting to say. Lips slightly parted as his eyes widen at the sight. “Oh, fuck.” He swallows.
You stare at him, breaths getting stuck in your throat. “Is that good or bad?” Your hands go to hug yourself a little. He stares back before rolling his head back and he chuckles.
“In what world would that be a bad thing?” He laughs out, his voice sounding deep. “You were right though.” He takes a breath before looking at you again. “I do like what you’re wearing. A lot.” 
A small smile begins spreading on your lips before your hands go to your sides, “Oh.”
“I change my mind. Come here, to me. Stand up my pretty girl.” He orders you softly, your body tingling. “I need to see you properly.”
“Jungkook…” You glance to the side, “That feels—”
“—It feels like what I want.” He cuts you off, his eyes darkening. “So be good for me and come here.”
Well, this is what you asked for. You take a deep breath before lifting yourself from his mattress and you try to feel confident even though his eyes are glued to you…it feels like he’s sinking his teeth into every inch of skin your body offers. 
“You know, when you look shy like this it only makes me want to have more fun with you, you know that, right?” He smirks, eyes going to your eyes finally. 
“I’m not shy.” You mumble, “I’m just…” 
“I know.” He softens, he drops the box he’s been holding to his bed before his hand reaches out for you. “Now come here.”
You stand from the bed, legs slowly taking you closer to him. He keeps his hand extended for you and you finally reach for it and he guides you closer and closer. “Let me just look at you.” He says, eyes leaving yours.
Jungkook sees the black straps that cling to your shoulders, raking them lower to see how this lacey black bra is completely see through. He bites down onto his bottom lip, seeing how your nipples poke through the material. His eyes go lower, a brow raising for a moment when he sees the black garter belt wrapped around your waist, above your black and completely see through panties. 
“Hm.” His fingers reach to touch the garter belt, he traces one of the suspenders down to where it connects with the lace garter around your thigh. “I knew I felt this when I touched you earlier.” He hums, referring to the garter. “It’s why I asked what you were wearing.”
“I figured.” You say quietly. Breaths bated.
“You look so beautiful.” He tells you just as quiet, “But I need you to turn around for me.”
You feel the heat rush to your cheeks, your own teeth nibbling your lips and Jungkook suddenly looks amused.
“Embarrassed?” He muses, “Here.” He reaches for your hand and lifts it above your head. “Spin for me, baby.”
You exhale a deep breath…you know he’s going to like this. But you feel fucking exposed like this. “Okay.”
You turn slowly, feeling his eyes on your backside. His hand leaves yours before both his hands come to your shoulders and he’s leaning forward, lips pressing against your shoulder. “I thought so.” He whispers. “A thong, huh?” Jungkook chuckles darkly, “Your ass looks amazing.”
“Yeah?” You whisper, cheeks still on fire. 
“Mhm.” He says, his hands brushing down your back before he’s cupping your ass in his hands. “You know how badly I want to fuck you?”
“Then fuck me.”
“No.” Jungkook steps away from you, hands going to your shoulders again when he turns you around to face him. “Not yet.”
“Not yet?” You gaze at him, “Don’t tell me something like you want to take your time with me?” You tease. Jungkook lightly scoffs, his hands dropping and fingers curving around your waist.
“That wasn’t going to be my answer but it also works.” He whispers, his eyes are filling with something you don’t totally recognize. “But,” One of his hands leave your waist, fingers trailing up your body before he’s got his fingers brushing one of your cheeks. “My original answer is that I have to ruin you first. Get you so desperate that you’re begging and crying for my cock.” He tells you slowly, fingers still stroking your cheek. “Get you saying and doing anything I want.”
You lick your drying lips, heart rate speeding up in your chest. “You think you’re capable of that?” You aren’t even challenging him. You’re genuinely asking.
“It’s for me.” His fingers stop stroking your cheek, instead he cups your jaw before leaning in and placing a long kiss to your lips. You close your eyes, staying closed even when he pulls away from you. “I think you’d be surprised what you might do for me.” 
Eyes opening as you stare into him. Your breaths aren’t as even as you’d like, his words always make your body react even when your brain tells you to calm down. But he might be right. You are also questioning it…what all would you do if it’s with Jungkook?
“Now you can lay on the bed.” He tells you, backing away from your body when he glances down at the mattress where he placed the box he got from the closet. “Once you’re laying down, put your hands together above your head.”
Your hearts stops. “W-What? Why?” 
“Because it’s what I want?” He looks at you, “And you trust me, right?”
You sigh out, “Okay, yeah.”
“Then lay down. Put your hands together. And put them above your head.” He grabs the small box from the bed, opening the top and you see exactly what you figured. “Also, have your legs spread a little.”
You can’t help but swallow hard, your knee lifting to the mattress as you make your way to the head of the bed, laying down against his pillows. You look down at your hands, hesitantly connect your wrists before slowly raising them above your head. You see how your chest rises and falls heavily, your breaths coming out almost harshly—the anticipation is killing you. 
Jungkook sets the box down, his fingers inside, moving some things around before he’s pulling out a couple of things. You gulp, knowing this was his plan…your hunch was correct. He’s got some silky material rolled up before he unravels it, smile on his face, looking satisfied. He sets it down before pulling out something else silky. You aren’t dumb. You can recognize a proper blindfold anywhere.
“Don’t worry,” Jungkook lifts his eyes to you, “We won’t jump into this quite yet. Got to get you comfortable first with the idea…but this…” He grabs the other silky material from the bed, unraveling it further. “We can start here.”
You take a deep breath before nodding your head. Jungkook smiles at you before he closes the box and sets it down onto the floor. He grabs the two items he took from the box and walks to your side of the bed. “Okay,” He sets the blindfold down onto nightstand. “It’s very convenient my head board is like this, huh?” 
“I’m starting to think you bought it like this for this reason now.” You tease him, your hands resting against his steal railing head board. 
“Nah,” He shrugs cutely, “I like the style. But like I said, very convenient.” He leans over you, grabbing your wrists gently. “Also, I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t imagined you like this when I bought it.” 
You laugh, “You bought it like two years ago.” 
“And?” He chuckles, bringing the silk restraints to your wrists, wrapping the material somewhat tightly around them. “If you think I only started imagining what it would be like to fuck you since a few months ago then you are gravely mistaken.” He ties the ribbon tighter, then he is lifting your hands a little higher, “Tying you to the bed now.” He says, making a knot around the steal rail.
“You…thought of me—”
“—What can I say?” He pulls your wrists away from the rail, making sure the restraints are secure. “I’m a man with taste.” 
Your breaths become a little heavier, a flame burning at your skin. “Oh.” Then you crack a smile when he leans back and gazes at you. “You must be horny if you admitted that.”
“Well, I am fucking horny. Look at you.” He chuckles, his hand going to his sweats, trying to adjust them. “But you should know I admit anything I want whenever I want.”
“Question for you,” You roll your lips together, “You aren’t going to wear all of that right?” You nod towards him, “I would prefer if you lost some clothes.”
Jungkook’s lips curve up, “Would you? Hm,” He lifts his shirt off his body, “I can give you a little bit of a view, I guess.”
“Pants too?” You ask him innocently, making him exhale a long breath.
“Keeping my briefs on.” He narrows his eyes, “It’s only fair. You’d be wearing more than me at that point.”
“That’s fine with me.” You bite your lip, “At least I can see your thighs like that.”
“Oh?” He chuckles, “Yeah, you’ve gotten off on them a few times, huh?”
“Yeah.” Your eyes drop to his lower half when he starts dragging his sweatpants off. “You’re so fucking hot.”
Jungkook pauses, mouth falling open in slight surprised. “You think so?” He asks before slowly finishing taking off the pants, kicking them away.
“Of course.” You nod, “You’ve always been cute.”
“Nah, you said hot just now. Not cute.”
“You’re both.”
“Hm, okay.”
“Um,” You pull at the restraints for a moment, “I have an itch.”
Jungkook raises his brows before laughing, “Tell me where.”
“Left cheek.” You whine, “Hurry.”
He leans down a little, fingers going to your cheek before you whine again, “My left.”
“Oh.” He laughs, “Okay.” He’s scratching your other cheek and you sigh in relief. “Is it fucked up that even seeing how you feel good from just that made me want to fuck you more?”
You snort, “Jungkook, what the hell?”
“I mean, because of the noise you made.” He explains, “Can you see how hard I am already?” He looks down at his crotch, your eyes following. You definitely see a bulge. “It’s too bad you’re not allowed to touch me for some time.” 
“You know, as much as I love talking to you…you do have me here, in these kinds of clothes…with my hands tied together to your bed…and you haven’t done anything to me yet?” 
“Maybe I’m giving you time to get comfortable with it.” He smiles at you. “Nothing matters to me more than your comfort. But if that’s you saying you’re ready for this night to begin…then I am happy to oblige.”
“Then oblige.” You take a deep breath. “I don’t want you to hold back.”
Jungkook laughs a little, his hand going to your thigh, fingers sliding down until he’s wrapping them around your ankle. “Didn’t I tell you to spread your legs?” He asks, tugging your leg closer to him. “We’re barely getting started and you don’t even know how to listen…thought you were going to be good for me?” His fingers unwrap from your ankle before they travel up your thigh again. 
“I am…” You sigh out, his fingers playing with the garter. “Not sure I’d let anyone else do this to me…ever.”
“What happens when you like it?” He asks lowly, fingers now barely skidding across your hips. 
You slowly close your eyes at the feeling, “I would just have to keep coming back to you.” You say. Jungkook pauses his ministrations, his eyes shooting towards your face when he looks at you with a certain hopelessness that you completely miss.
“And I’d probably never turn you away.” He whispers, fingers going back to touching you. 
You lift your lids to eye him, “Probably?”
He smirks, “Oh, should I tell you that I definitely wouldn’t turn you away?”
“It’s preferred.” You say before your body tenses. “Oh.”
Jungkook’s fingers have made their way to your breasts, the thin material does little to stop the feeling he’s causing. The tip of his finger circles around your covered nipple…Jungkook stares down at you, your chest rising at his touch, back arching and head falling more into the pillows behind you.
“Prettiest girl.” He tells you, his own breaths picking up. You think this is one of those times he is saying it without him trying to sound teasing. Maybe he was right. With the way he’s staring down at you, maybe he does mean it. And that just makes your body feel even more on fire.
“Jungkook…” The breathless way you say his name makes him shut his eyes and sigh out. 
“I know.” Is all he says before he maneuvers his way onto the bed with you, his knees between your spread thighs as he leans down, arms on either side of you. “y/n.” 
Jungkook’s face is just inches from yours…you wish you could wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in so you can kiss him but…you fucking can’t. His eyes dart up where he sees you slightly pulling at the restraints on instinct. “Already?” His lips turn up. “Oh, this is going to be fun.” 
“Jung—”
His lips connect with yours, soft against your mouth but still so firm in the way that makes your toes curl. He moves his lips against you slowly, his breaths and taste feel hypnotizing, as if your inability to touch him has made you focus only on his lips. You felt tense at first but the moment he sighs into your mouth, you feel the way you melt. Body turning to goo on his mattress. 
Jungkook pulls away for a moment, eyes studying your face with such a lascivious expression. His hand comes to your jaw and he angles it up towards him, eyes growing heavy. “You need to breathe.” He tells you nice and slow.
You blink at him, not realizing you had even been holding your breath. You breathe out a heavy puff of air, your own eyes half lidded and furrowed brows. “I wish I could touch you.” 
“I know.” He licks his lips, “I love your touch.” His fingers grip your jaw a little tighter, turning your face to the side. He leans in, mouth at your ear. “I get so fucking weak when you touch me.” 
Jungkook lowers his head more, lips going right below your ear before he kisses it. Then a little lower, more kisses. Your eyes flutter shut at the softness of his lips, breaths still heavy. But your brows really pinch together when he starts sucking on your skin, teeth nipping and you release a moan in response. One hand on your jaw and the other behind your neck as he continues kissing and sucking. You squirm beneath him, toes curling in and out and your wrists softly pulling the restraints again. 
The hand on your jaw lowers until you feel him massaging one of your breasts, thumb brushing against your nipple and you start to close your thighs around him from how good you feel, the ache between your legs only growing stronger.
“No.” Jungkook lifts his face, eyes going to yours. “I don’t think so.” His fingers travel to your inner thigh. So fucking close but not close enough. “Spread them again.” He softly demands, fingers pushing your thigh away from him. 
“Jungkook.” You look up at him, the way he’s hovering over you makes you feel so helpless.
“Yes baby?” He leans down, nudging his nose with yours. “Be a little more patient,” He whispers, “Because the more impatient you act…the more I will make you wait.” 
Your breaths are erratic now, your expression shifting into something more desperate than before. “It’s not my fault.” You whimper and he swears the way you sounded makes him want to forget all of this and just fuck you, fast and rough. 
“I know it’s not your fault.” He shuts his eyes, body lowering itself closer to you. “It’s mine.” He says it so proudly, lips colliding with yours, the action rougher than before. You react quickly, kissing him back harder. His hand is at your jaw again, tight and possessive. He barely pulls away, lust completely taken over as he traces your bottom lip with his tongue. God, the action feels so lewd. 
You’re struggling beneath him, body on fire from his touch, his kiss, his expression, his smell, his taste. You feel completely out of your element, helpless as you let him do whatever he wants, taking his fucking time and making you lose your mind.
Jungkook smirks at you, planting one more kiss to your lips before he starts kissing down your chest. Your heaving chest, with a lace bra that does nothing to cover your tits. His hands are busy, lifting the bra above your breasts, his kisses landing everywhere, tongue flicking your sensitive nipple. You arch your back more, breathy moans beginning to slip out. 
He doesn’t stop there, he continues kissing down your stomach, in all the places the garter belt doesn’t cover. Hands gripping your hips tightly, stopping you from moving them so much. You look down at him and bite down onto your bottom lip, hard. His hair is messy, falling into his dark eyes that concentrate on your body. 
You watch him, breathless, anticipating for his lips to find your wet cunt so you can finally feel some sort of relief but much to your dismay…he completely skips over your center. His fingers continue to dig into your hips as he lowers himself more, biting at your thighs as you whine for him.
“Jungkook…fuck, please.” You struggle to hide your desperation now. “Please, Jungkook. I need you. I don’t know if I can handle this pace anymore…please…” 
Jungkook does stop…a smile forming on his lips as he lifts his head to look up at you. “Did you finally just beg? Properly? For the first time?”
You continue to bite your lips, hips still trying to move but he’s firm in holding you down. 
“You did.” He tells you, clearly satisfied. “Okay, babe. I think it’s time I give you what you want.”
Thank fucking goodness because you are honestly feeling pathetic at this point. And you hate that it makes your lower belly swirl in desire because Jungkook looks so fucking pleased with it.
His fingers go to your inner thighs, his eyes glued to your pussy, the see through panties showing him everything. “Spread your legs further apart.” He orders and you listen. Jungkook’s fingers get closer, trailing slowly towards the most sensitive part your thighs have to offer. 
He takes one finger and barely brushes it over your underwear. Your hips buck up, a soft cry leaving your lips. “Fuck, Jungkook.” You moan. 
He bites his lip, eyes concentrated on you. His fingers pull your underwear to the side, exposing your wet heat that immediately makes him gulp. “Fucking hell, y/n.” He struggles to breathe evenly, “I can’t believe I was worried today. Look at what I do to you.” His cheeks are blazing. “I’m the only one who can do this to you, aren’t I? With you spread like this, your pussy is on display for me.” He keeps the underwear pushed to the side as his other hand come towards you, a single finger touches you. You tense, once again feeling so helpless. 
Jungkook gently strokes your pussy with his one finger, getting it soaked in your juices. You feel like this one motion alone could have you trembling. He uses two fingers now, the digits exploring everything between your folds. You’re unable to keep quiet, being touched by him feels like heaven. You shut your eyes, hips circling.
Jungkook keeps playing with you, his fingers finally lowering until he’s toying with your entrance. You squeeze your eyes, teeth digging into your bottom lip, waiting so fucking patiently to feel him enter you. And he does, both of his fingers push inside and you let out a long, drawn out moan. He momentarily looks away from your heat, eyes going to your face when he sees how fucked out you look.
“Do you know how much I love your pussy?” He asks you, the tone of his voice makes you clench around his fingers. “So fucking much. Love eating it, making you come on my tongue.” 
Your wrists pull at the restraints again, the urge to just push his head down with your hands and pull his hair as he eats you out is strong. But of course you cannot. He smiles when he sees you open your eyes to gaze down at him. His fingers begin sliding in and out of you, your walls tight around them before he’s curling them…you finally feel more of a relief. 
“I know exactly what you like, hm?” 
“Yes.” You sigh, content that you’re finally being touched like this.
He keeps moving his fingers expertly before his face comes closer to your core, he breathes you in and licks his lips. “I want to cover your pretty pussy in my cum…” He breathes out roughly, “I bet you’d love that, huh?” His fingers move faster.
“Yeah, I would…” You admit, biting your lip to conceal a smirk. “I would love to have your cum anywhere on me.”
“Yeah?” He looks up at you, nose so close to brushing against your clit. “Hmm…” 
“Jungkook…” Your eyes roll around, pleasure building but you want more. You’re about to tell him but he’s not dumb, he knows exactly what you want. And he gives it to you. His tongue is suddenly dipping between your folds, pressed against the place that is throbbing, aching, screaming in desperation. 
You don’t mean to cry out, the feeling so overwhelming after all his teasing. He licks your clit with calculated strokes, pressed against you, so warm and wet and god, the way his tongue starts moving around, swirling and flicking…you swear you could finally come. 
His fingers don’t stop as he groans into you, the sound only turning you on even more. You’re going crazy, squirming and struggling to stay still as the pleasure builds and builds. You feel so good though, surprised how being restrained has made this experience much more exhilarating. 
“Fuck, that’s good…Jungkook, yes…” You whine, “Mm…” Your hips rise and his free hand forces them back down to the mattress, his tongue absolutely about to bring you over the edge. “I’m so close…” You watch him, brows pulled together with sweat at your hairline. “You’re going to make me come.” 
He keeps working his fingers inside you, feeling the way you pulse around them. He wraps his lips around your clit, sucking on it as you cry out loudly. Yeah, you’re coming. You move your head around, unable to control how strong it is…wrists knocking against the steal rail, body finally going tense as Jungkook’s name falls from your mouth over and over.
The high has infiltrated every part of your body. The feeling so good, coming all over Jungkook’s tongue. You’re panting, thighs squishing his cheeks as you ride it out, the fall of your orgasm happening so slowly but god, it feels incredible. His fingers leave your core and you almost miss them.
Jungkook looks up at you, the lewdness in his eyes only grows more and more before he’s letting go of your clit and flicking his tongue over it again and again. Your soft cries turn into full on whimpers when you get hit with a different feeling…
“W-What are you…” You continue to pant, “Fuck, what are you d-doing?” You look down at him, face twisting at the new feeling. “Fuck…w-wait, Jungkook…” Your head falls back, deeper into the pillow as your eyes roll around.
It’s almost painful, the way he’s still eating you out. You’ve never dabbled in overstimulation before, not even to yourself. But you’re choosing to trust him even though you think you cannot handle it. 
“Fuck.” You almost scream out the word, body set on fire until suddenly…the warmth isn’t blazing, instead it feels good. “Jungkook…” You say his name in a content defeat. Pleasure taking over anything that was once uncomfortable. He moans into your pussy, clearly satisfied that you’re being good for him…just like you said you would be. 
You had no idea what to expect but coming again just a minute after your last orgasm wasn’t something you thought would happen. This time though, it’s more intense…the buildup was quick but fucking powerful and you aren’t sure you’ve ever came this hard before. Moans and words that make no sense leave your mouth. 
You grind your hips against Jungkook’s face and he lets you ride it out exactly the way you want, he hums, praising you for being so good. When your orgasm finally comes down, you finally relax your body and manage your breath control. It’s hard because you feel so weak now. 
Jungkook rises from your body, a small smile on his shining lips. “You’re so perfect.” He rasps out, “I’ve been wanting to do that for you for ages.” 
“Jungkook…” You say his name so softly, your voice almost shaky and he feels his heart swell in pride. Your head sunk into the pillows behind you, your hands limp above you, eyes closed as you still try to even out your breathing.
“Hm?” He rises from between your legs and crawls over you until his face is over yours, “What is it, my pretty girl?” And then he leans in slowly, pecking your lips a few times. You don’t kiss back but you do start to smile between his kisses. 
“Are…” You finally start to open your eyes so you can look up at him, his gaze already on you. “Are you going to untie me now?” You ask, fingers twitching above you.
“Why would I do that?” He leans in again, lips finding yours for a firmer kiss before he pulls back, “One more thing before I do.” 
“Which…is?” You blink at him, “You aren’t done?”
“Done?” He pushes his head back slightly, a sign of disbelief on his features. “I am not done with you, y/n.” Jungkook’s eyes are so soft on you, a small smile on his lips before he lowers his head into the crook of your neck. “…Will I ever be done with you?” and then there’s a barely there kiss being placed right below your ear. You aren’t sure if it’s the action or his words just now that is making your insides feel all jumbled.
“I want to touch you…” You mumble, cheeks feeling warmer than usual. 
“I know.”
No, he doesn’t know. You know he’s thinking about how you probably want to touch him in the way that has his head being thrown back, curses leaving his mouth as you make him feel good. But that isn’t even what you meant. You almost hate what you did mean. 
“Want to touch you so bad, Jungkook.” You murmur quietly, eyes closing again.
“I know you do.”
He still doesn’t know, you think. A slight frustration building but you can only settle for defeat. You want to touch him, yes. But in the way that has him staring into your eyes with his usual look of tenderness and understanding. You want to touch him, yes. But in the way that it’s just your fingers stroking his cheek as you praise him, words letting him how well he treats you and how good he makes you feel. That’s how you want to touch him.
Jungkook lifts his head, eyes on yours again. “But I told you, your touch makes me weak, y/n. And I can’t give into you yet…I’m still making you mine…” He pauses, tongue poking out to lick his lips, almost anxiously before he continues with a hushed tone, “You’ve already made me yours, it’s my turn…” 
It’s quiet between you both for a moment. He’s staring into your eyes and you aren’t sure what you’re feeling. You want to feel anxious because this feels too much. But the urge to reach out and touch his cheek is still here and you don’t know what to do with that.
“You still trust me, right?” He smiles again now, “And are you feeling comfortable again? We can continue?”
You blink in slight surprise, he’s changed the subject. But right, this is about sex. “I do trust you…and yeah, I’m feeling better.”
Quick kiss to your lips before he’s lifting himself away from you, his feet landing on the floor. You turn your head to the side to see him standing in front of the night stand, he’s chewing on his lips, clearly thinking. “Okay…” He breathes out.
“Oh…” You realize he’s staring at the blindfold. The thought of not being able to move your hands but also not be able to see…is a little interesting. And also a little scary. But it’s Jungkook.
He reaches for the blindfold, fingers grasping the silk material before he glances at you, “I know you might be tense at first,” He speaks calmly, “But it’s just me. Remember, my goal is to make you feel good. Trust me…and I promise, I will give you everything from your fantasies.”
“I do trust you.” You assure him, “I just hope…” Your voice gets quieter, “That I am also something out of your fantasies.”
Jungkook’s lips part but he doesn’t speak. He keeps his eyes on you and you can tell he’s wanting to say something but no words leave him. It makes you feel dizzy. Did you say something wrong? 
“I just mean—”
“—This doesn’t compare to anything my dumb imagination could come up with.” He says quickly before clearing his throat. “Believe me.”
Your body relaxes instantly at his words. “Okay.”
Jungkook’s lips curve and then he’s getting closer to you, the blindfold being fiddled between his fingers, “Going to cover your eyes now. Answer me this…do you want me to tell you everything I want to do before I do it? Or do you want the element of surprise but I walk you through it? Might do things you don’t expect…but I will not hurt you…” He assures softly, “I will check in with you and never hesitate to tell me if you don’t like something. Okay?” 
“Yeah.” You nod, “Element of surprise.” Your stomach tightens at the sight of the blindfold, his fingers playing with the material and suddenly there’s a welcomed sensation beginning to electrify your body again. 
Jungkook smirks down at you before he’s placing the blindfold closer to you, your eyes focused on him before your sight goes dark and his fingers are at the back of your head, tying it. Your eyelashes flutter against the silk, the new darkness suddenly feels strange to you. “I’m still here, baby.” Jungkook whispers, his fingers now at your cheek. “Try to relax.” 
Once again, you haven’t realized you were holding in a breath, stomach still tensed but his voice and touch is all the comfort you need. You try to relax your muscles as you release a long breath. “Will you kiss me?” You ask him, your eyes darting around but it’s just the darkness that has you.
“Yes.” He responds, his fingers leaving your cheek. You feel strange again. The absence of his touch has you moving your head around, as if looking for him. But still, the silk over your eyes takes that away from you. One moment. Two moments. Three moments. Still nothing. 
“Jung—”
And then you feel his warm breath over your lips…he’s close, obviously. But he still isn’t touching you. The feeling makes you feel almost antsy, it’s still strange but your lower belly is starting to swirl like lava. You swallow hard, lips parted as you try to breathe even once again.
Suddenly, Jungkook’s finger, you’ll assume thumb, comes to your bottom lip, pulling it down. He’s still softly breathing over your mouth as his thumb softly tugs at your lip…and now you can feel how your breaths pick up because his pacing is driving you mad. 
They say that depriving one of your senses can heighten your other senses but you’re learning quickly that anticipation is another sense. And it is a highly sensitive one. His breath is warm on your lips and suddenly you can feel the tip of his tongue sliding over your bottom lip, it’s wet and soft and you feel your heart start to race.
Jungkook’s tongue is barely touching you though, the way he glides his tongue, tracing your bottom lips feels so featherlike. Then you are silently gasping when his teeth nip at you before he’s sucking your lip…your stomach tenses again. Lava still swirling and the feeling between your legs is a subtle but taunting tingle. 
You release a breathy moan, unable to stop yourself. But it gets swallowed, his thumb quickly dropping from your mouth and his lips land on yours as he groans, his hands cupping your jaw now. You feel completely enveloped in his touch. Back arching as you push your chest up into his. His lips are perfectly slotted between yours. But he’s he is quick to pull away. 
And then you feel nothing but coldness again. His hands leave you, his lips leave you, his breath that brought you comfort…leaves you. You’re left breathing heavily, surrounded in darkness with no way to even reach out for him. “Jungkook?” You call out.
“Still here, baby.” He tells you but his voice sounds more distant. “Wait for me for a minute.” And then you can hear his feet quietly shuffling away and suddenly you feel strange again. You feel stuck, lost, helpless. But instead of fear you feel that new sense, the anticipation. And it feels scary in the way that feels exhilarating.
Your body does feel a sense of comfort, your skin rubbing against his sheets and it’s like your skin knows these are Jungkook’s sheets…your head leaned against his pillows and it’s the same feeling. You know it’s his pillows.  The smell of the room, it’s him. It’s all him. He’s everywhere despite the fact he is not near you. Your breasts are still exposed, nipples perked at the AC blowing into the room, small goosebumps beginning to infect your skin. 
You slide your feet towards you, knees bending as you wait. Your panties are covering your heat again since Jungkook’s fingers are no longer pushing them to the side and you feel the stickiness of your previous and current arousal on the material. You wait. And wait. Focusing on listening for Jungkook’s footsteps. You miss him.
You think you hear that box from earlier being opened again, the same sound of his fingers scrambling through it. It doesn’t last long…the sound. Quiet footsteps again. You’re wondering if he’s being this quiet on purpose, yes, you know he wants to make you as comfortable as possible but he also wants to make it fun too. You kind of appreciate it, if you’re honest. Comfort is nice but the way he’s making you feel from all the mystery is also making you ache in the best way. It’s quiet for some time and you think he’s left the room. Waiting and waiting…sounds in the distance. More waiting.
Suddenly, you can feel the bed dip near your feet. Your head turns in the direction, lips parted as you try to breathe again. You know it’s him, obviously. But being left in the dark creates this doubt that eats you from the inside.
“It’s me.” He whispers, his warm hand landing on your ankle. You can feel the bed dip more, his body going between your legs again. His hands on either side of your ankles, his fingers wrapped loosely around them. “You don’t know but,” His fingers unwrap themselves from your left ankle, fingers sliding up your leg. “You look so beautiful like this.” Suddenly, he’s urging you to lift that same leg, he bends it back until he’s lifting it over his shoulder. 
“You like it that much?” You bite your lip, concealing a smile.
“Can you admit it now?” His fingers drag over your leg until you feel them tugging at the garter on your thigh. “You wore this for me, right? You wanted to please me?” He asks you, voice husky.
“Did I?” You breathe out, “I don’t—”
He pulls the garter back before snapping it against your thigh, a slight sting. “Tell me.”
You gasp quietly at the action, breaths picking up more before you decide to be honest. “Fine. I did. I knew you might like it and I wanted you to think I looked nice.”
“Good.” He says, fingers messing with the garter, you can feel how he unclips the suspender. “I’ve enjoyed how you look with all of this on. You look more than nice. You look…” He pauses, fingers beginning to drag the garter down your thigh as he slides it up, getting if off you at your ankle that rests on his shoulder. “You look obscenely indecent.” He says slowly, smirk in his voice.
You laugh a little, the sound is airy. “Indecent?”
“Yes.” He murmurs, “I don’t want anyone else to ever see you like this.” And then he’s lowering your leg and giving attention to the other one. He repeats the actions…lifting it over his shoulder, unclipping the garter and sliding it off of you. The leg lowers back as well. 
He’s still in between your legs, but you feel how he moves closer. Suddenly, his hands are around your waist, your body tensing at the way he lightly grips you. You feel how he falls forward, his head burying in your stomach before you can feel soft kisses over your skin.
“Pretty,” He says, fingers playing with the garter belt, “But it has to go.” He lifts himself before sliding it down, over your hips. You lift your ass some to help, his hands pulling down the material quickly. “These too.” He says, snapping the band of your underwear against your skin. 
You can’t help but moan, feeling breathless. “You want me naked, huh?” 
“Yeah.” He says, urging you to lift your hips again so he can drag the panties off of you. “It’s a view I love even more.” 
The air is chilly against all your exposed skin. You want to close your legs together but Jungkook’s body between them does cause a nice warmth but you aren’t sure if it’s from his actual body heat or because it’s Jungkook…you know, between your fucking legs. You feel his fingers at your breasts, your chest rising and falling quickly when he barely drags a finger over your nipple.
“I will buy you more lingerie.” He tells you in a whisper. “So don’t be mad.”
“What—”
His hands pull your bra towards him, stretching the material before you hear it rip. He is tearing the flimsy, lace bra in half. 
“Jungkook!” Your eyelashes flutter against the silk quickly, “Why did you—”
“—Your hands are tied up.” He lets the bra fall before he’s dragging it from under you. “This was the easiest way to get it off.” You can hear how his voice sounds so fucking proud. 
“You’re right.” You pout. “You are buying me more.” 
“Without a doubt, babe.” He chuckles, “But whatever I buy you is only for me.”
You release a long sigh, “Baby…babe…you really don’t follow rule number 3, do you?” 
“Nope.” He says cutely, “Just like your other rules, it’s stupid.”
“Jungkook—”
“—And that’s me being easy with you, I have to hold myself back from calling you a million other things.” 
“Oh,” your lips lift a little, “Like what?” 
“No, no, no.” He sings, “Don’t want to break your rules too crazily.” His hand comes to cup your jaw, “You’re feeling more comfortable, right?” He asks, voice not teasing anymore. “Because I want to ruin you, the prettiest girl in the world, god, I want to ruin you.”
Your breath hitches, your eyes focused on the darkness the silk offers, wrists straining against the steal rail above you. “Do what you want with me, Jungkook.” You finally say, voice close to shaking. “Anything you want, anything…”
Jungkook is quiet, his hand leaves your jaw and you start tensing again. He’s still hovering over you but he isn’t speaking, he isn’t touching you, he isn’t giving you anything to work with. One moment. Two moments. Three moments. 
Finally, you can feel the back of his fingers at your elbow, his touch lightly cascading down your inner arm. It tickles but there is no sense to laugh, it tickles in the way that makes your heart start racing, tickles in the way that feels like this tingle is traveling across your entire body. His fingers continue to dance down, falling down your side now, passing the edge of your breast, passing your waist, your hips. 
“You like being touched by me?” He asks, lowly.
“Y-Yeah.” You gulp, “It feels good.” 
Jungkook lowers his head, lips ghosting over your lips before he speaks again. “What else do you do to please me?” 
“What?”
“I said,” His other hand suddenly comes to your breast, fingers pinching your nipple before he softly rolls the nub, leaving you gasping. “What else do you do to please me?” 
“I don’t know.” You respond slowly, your eyes finally closing, a pitch black darkness. “Maybe everything.”
“You’re admitting something like that?” He chuckles over your mouth, lips brushing against yours with each word he speaks. “Did you answer like that because you know it would also please me?” 
“I answered like that because it’s the truth.” You whisper, “I like making you feel good too.”
Jungkook’s slow to move his lips over yours for a kiss. He loves kissing you, he loves your lips, he loves how you sound when you get into it, he loves passing moans between your mouths, he loves tasting you. You kiss him back just as slow. Mouths moving together languidly as he barely slips his tongue into your mouth, nice and smooth and lazy. 
His hand tightens around your jaw before his fingers go to your lips, keeping them spread, forcing your mouth to fall open when he sucks on your tongue more messily. God, the feeling is so lewd but you can only imagine how hot this looks.
You moan out loud, playing with his tongue just as expertly, the feeling feels like velvet. He lets go of your face, his lips slotting over yours again and then he’s really kissing you, faster, rougher, messier. He’s moaning into your mouth and you eat them right up. You aren’t sure how long you two have been kissing for but it’s long enough to have the ache between your legs start to feel mind numbingly painful. 
Your hips are stirring, your wrists are pulling at the restraints and your vision is nonexistent. Jungkook pulls away, breathing heavy over your mouth, a quiet whine leaving his lips. “I can’t wait to fuck you.” Is all he says, leaving you more breathless than before.
And then there is coldness again. He’s leaving you. And he takes all the heat with him. “Jungkook?” You call for him, still trying to catch your breath. “Jungkook?” You bob your head around but of course you cannot see. You squeeze your thighs together and you are met with your arousal, the stickiness coating your skin. 
Suddenly, there is something dripping onto your lower stomach. Some kind of liquid? It’s warm…really warm. The new feeling shocks you, something new and unexpected. You can feel this liquid dribbling over your skin, sliding down your sides, a heat following it. 
“I heat up some oil,” Jungkook’s voice is suddenly heard. “It’s going to be really warm but it should feel good…to relax you.”
Your mouth has fallen open, slow, deep pants following. It does feel good. Suddenly, more oil is dripping, you feel the wet warmth fall to your breasts, down your sternum. It rolls over your skin, probably dripping to the sheets but you don’t think Jungkook cares. 
You can feel each droplet of oil on your skin. It’s hypersensitive. It’s like you can imagine the thick liquid rolling down your sides, tickling you, a path of fire in its wake.  “Is it too warm?” He asks “Or is it good?”
You’re still breathing heavily, “It feels so good.” You squirm a little, the oil tickling your skin. 
“Good.” He says before you feel his hands on you, fingers spreading the oil into your hips. It feels even warmer, like it’s spreading into the wildest of fires. “I wasn’t sure if it cooled down enough. But I tested it, I thought you might like it this warm.”
“I do.” You sigh in content now that his hands are finally on you again, “It feels amazing.”
His hands explore more, he’s spreading the oil down to the tops of your thighs, fingers digging into your skin, the heat following. Then his hands are on your chest, the oil coating your breasts, he’s massaging your nipples, a drawn out moan leaving your lips. 
Suddenly, His hands leave you and Jungkook is in between your legs again and your ears perk up. A sound you weren’t expecting gets your attention…a sound that is slick, fast and unholy. Is he…? You’re still breathing roughly when you can hear the consistent sound in front of you and Jungkook is moaning himself. 
You know exactly what he’s doing. And you fucking hate that you cannot see him.
“Jungkook…” You whine, “Take this blindfold off…I need to see you.”
“Too bad, y/n.” He groans out, the slick sound is obscene. You know he has his oiled fingers wrapped around his cock and he’s stroking himself above you. “Just to clarify,” He moans again, “You are on birth control still, right?”
“Are you going to—”
“—Not going to come in you.” He says, struggling to keep his voice clear. “But you are, right?”
“Yes.” You feel so helpless and upset you cannot touch him or see him. “Are we—”
“—No.” The sound suddenly stops. “I’m not fucking you yet. But,” He lowers himself a little closer to you, the subtle feeling of his hard length brushing against your inner thigh just barely. “I am going to enjoy this view as much as possible.” He says before your body finally sets itself on fire. The head of his cock rests at the tops of your folds, suddenly, his length is moving side to side, spreading your folds apart and he’s rubbing against your clit. You both moan in unison.  
“Oh fuck,” He cries out softly, “I make you this wet?” 
You only whimper in response, his cock sliding vertically now, just moving against your folds. He’s whining above you, moving his hips to barely brush against your wet, dripping cunt, rubbing against every nerve in your clit, the feeling making you go crazy. You move your legs, wrapping them around Jungkook’s waist, trying your hardest to push your heels into him so he will lower himself even more but he’s stronger than you.
“No, baby.” He pants out, “This is for me. Not you.” Suddenly, he stops moving and you’re left feeling insane, wanting nothing more than to continue the feeling that was starting to build. His cock leaves your heat and you hear him breathing erratically above you. Then, the head of his cock drops to your clit, the feeling is heavy. The action repeats. He’s slapping his cock down onto your clit, repeatedly dropping it making you gasp as he moans. 
He starts rubbing against it more roughly now, quick and heavy. You’re squirming in your spot. Jungkook is still panting, his fingers wrapped around himself so tightly as he stares down at you. Your mouth has fallen open, your entire expression is wonton and dreamy. He wishes he could see your eyes now, he wants to see your entire face, he wants to see you and how good he makes you feel. He’s stroking himself as he rubs your clit repeatedly, his fingers moving faster and faster and he’s squeezing his eyes shut for only a moment, listening to your moans with all his focus. He’s so close. He’s going to come. He is going to come because of this view that is just for him. He is going to come because you did this for him. And he just wants to respect that.
“Ah, Jungkook…” You moan out his name, fuck, you must be close too. “Rub it faster, I’ll come…” You let him know, erratic breaths filling the room. 
Jungkook opens his eyes again, gazing down at your pussy. “No, baby.” He strokes faster, slightly lifting his cock from your folds. “This is for me, not you.” He groans, gripping the head of his dick and rubbing it quickly. He starts moaning continuously, the sound is whiney and salacious. He finally slows his movements as he loudly groans, pushing his cock back down to your folds again and warm cum starts spilling from his throbbing member. 
You’re met with such a hot, wet feeling. His cum coats and soaks the top of your pussy, the seed dribbling down your folds. Jungkook is still moaning above you, wet sounds as he still slowly strokes his dick. His eyes focused on the way his cum covers your cunt in white. The sight alone could make him come again. 
“Jungkook…” You cry out, “Holy fuck,” Your hips stir like crazy, swiveling in dire need. “I was so close too…”
“Don’t worry, you’ll be coming soon.” He sighs out, his hand finally coming to a stop. Eyes still on your pussy that is coated in his cum. “And I will finally give you something you want.” He tells you, out of breath. 
“What?” You ask but then suddenly you feel his fingers at the back of your head, untying the blindfold and it drops from your eyes. You shy away from the sudden brightness the room offers, not yet totally adjusted to the light. 
“I wouldn’t take this from you…” He whispers, lowering himself to kiss you. Lips barely giving you a proper kiss since he’s still breathing so erratically. You blink at nothing until he raises his head to look down at you. He’s got a layer of sweat coating his skin, beads gathered at his hairline and they slide down the sides of his face. 
“You look so fucking sexy.” You breathe out, eyes on his eyes. 
“You.” He whispers, lowering his face to your chest to kiss over your breasts. He goes lower and lower, lips pecking your hips, your pelvis. You watch as his dark eyes stare up at you before he’s licking his cum off the top of your cunt. He looks forever lost in you. And then your body goes rigid the moment he’s wrapping his lips around your bundle of nerves and his tongue is lazily moving. The right amount of pressure though. Pleasure instantly returning as he eats your pussy.
“Fuck,” You relax, eyes filling with more lust he’s ever seen. His tongue moves faster, harder against you and you’re squeezing your thighs on either side of his face, hips moving in rhythm. You’re moaning again, louder this time and he’s groaning so heavenly. The pleasure is building fast, it’s climbing and ready to jump off the highest of cliffs. You can’t wait to feel the sensation of free falling as you come all over his tongue. “Close, close, close.” You pant.
And then he fucking pulls away. You almost want to scream, the pleasure comes to an abrupt stop. You’re left with desperate movements and moans and he does nothing but smile at you. “Look at you, y/n.” He wipes his mouth, “Look at what I’m doing to you, my baby.” 
“Holy fuck, Jungkook…” Your wrists are pulling so hard at the silk tied around them, your brows pulled together in painful frustration.
“Your eyes are watering.” He tells you proudly. “Going to cry for me?” He taunts you, “Going to cry because I ripped away the thing you wanted most?” 
“Jungkook, Jungkook…” You feel dizzy. 
“I’m going to fuck you now.” He says, voice deeper than before. “Going to fuck you really hard. Going to fuck you so hard that you do cry.”
You blink back the sting in your eyes, “Jungkook…”
“Could you imagine that?” He continues to taunt you, expression growing darker. “Miss little control freak crying because I own the pleasure she wants to feel so badly? You’d look a little pathetic, wouldn’t you?” He asks before speaking slowly, “And so fucking sexy.” 
You stare up at him, brows still furrowed as his words process in your mind and you feel your pussy throb. Why are you enjoying this so much? Why are you ready to give yourself up for him? Why? Fucking why are you losing yourself to his words alone?
Jungkook’s lips curve into a dark smile, he reaches over you, fingers at your wrists as he quickly undoes the knots he created when this night first began. You’re free. Your wrists are free. And you don’t waste any time in pulling him down, crashing your lips to his, moaning into his mouth with zero shame. He’s never heard you like this. So fucking needy. So fucking loud.
He pulls away, dark eyes piercing into yours. “Turn over and raise your ass for me.” 
You gulp, entire body weak yet it listens to Jungkook’s demand, shaky limbs turning until your knees land on the mattress. Ass raised for him. His hands go to the sides of your hips, rubbing your skin so soothingly. He gets on his knees himself, positioning himself behind you. 
“Ah, fuck.” He rubs his hardening cock against your cheeks. “You’re all mine…” He says, hands rubbing the swell of your ass now, massaging your skin. “Are you enjoying this?”
“Y-Yes.” You moan, cheek pushing against the pillow. “You can…you can spank me, if you want.” You close your eyes in satisfaction at the way he’s massaging your cheeks, cock rubbing against you.
“Yeah?” He sounds pleased. “Good to know.” He squeezes your ass in his hands. “I have the condom here, hold on…” He reaches down to the mattress and you hear the packet rip and you imagine he’s rolling the condom on. “You’re still feeling okay?” He asks, one hand going to your ass, fingers exploring before you feel the tips of his fingers between your thighs, brushing over your folds, spreading them. 
“Yes…” You sigh in content, “I really need you.”
“Yeah?” He asks you, his other hand wrapping around his hard length. “You miss my cock inside you, huh?” “Fuck, I do…” His fingers rub against your clit for a moment before he’s pulling his hand away. “I need it so badly, Jungkook…I need you so badly.”
“Careful, baby.” He releases a long breath, position his member at your entrance, the tip poking against you teasingly. “Almost sounds like you’re getting desperate for me.”
“I am, Jungkook.” You moan, squeezing your eyes shut when he starts pushing himself forward. “God, I am…you’re making me go crazy.” You admit, breathing heavily as you feel the head of his cock get sucked into your pussy, walls hugging him.
“Oh, y/n…” He tries to breathe, “Fuck, you feel…” He pushes forward more, also using his hands to guide you backwards, pushing yourself onto his cock. “Amazing.”
Your legs are weak, shaky, your pussy stretching as he inserts himself more into you, inch by inch he is disappearing. It burns, his size splitting you apart but it feels so good. He’s thrusting forward softly, sighing heavily as he gives you time to adjust.
“How are you feeling? Hm? My pretty girl?” His hands rub your hips soothingly again, his body so tense as he controls his desire to fuck you. 
“Good.” You swallow hard, “Fuck, Jungkook, please, please, please…” You push your ass back more, “Fuck me.” You plead, your body moving on its own. You start moving your hips, needing more friction but Jungkook grips your hips tightly, stopping you from moving. 
Then one hand leaves your hip and you’re gasping, tightening around his cock the moment you feel his palm slapping against your ass. “I’m fucking you.” He groans. “Not the other way around.” 
Your legs shake more. Your walls gripping his length with insane arousal. “Jungkook…” You cry out, “Please.”
“I know, baby.” He rubs the spot he just slapped. “I’m going to make you feel,” He starts pulling out of you, cock brushing against your walls with tender movements. “So fucking good.” He pushes forward again, pelvis meeting your ass, making it jiggle. “So good.” He slides out again slowly before slapping his hips into you more roughly. 
You moan, body jolted forward when he starts repeating that same motion. He’s slow to pull out but he’s quick to thrust into you. Hitting you deeper and deeper each time. Your elbows are barely holding you up, your arms slide up, head completely buried in the pillow. Jungkook rocks into you, fucking you in rhythm now. His moans mix with the sound of his skin slapping your skin. 
“God, I love having you like this.” He almost growls, voice so deep, rumbling in his throat. “Fucking you like this, yeah,” His breaths are heavy, rough, almost a cry for help. “You look so fucking gorgeous…” He thrusts faster, “Your ass…” He squeezes it before slapping it again making you cry out. “Fuck.” He yells out aggressively, “My baby.”
Your stomach tenses, your knees wobble, your throat feels rawer from how loudly you’re moaning for him. The angle he has himself in is making you feel like you could come around his cock alone. He’s hitting the spot inside that you that has an orgasm threatening to erupt. “Jungkook…” You whine, eyes still slammed shut. “Fuck,”
Jungkook hands going under you, at your lower stomach before he’s urging you to lift yourself, “Come on, baby.” He groans, “Come on…”
“Can’t,” You whimper, “So fucking tired.” 
“Baby, come on…” He keeps fucking you, cock sliding into you roughly, no pain, just pleasure. 
You try your best, weak arms lifting your upper body and he helps you, his arms wrapped around your waist, lifting you towards him, back meeting his chest. Your head rolls back, landing above his shoulder, neck completely exposed as you breathe heavily, moaning with furrowed brows. 
“Jungkook.” You quietly cry out his name, barely even a whisper. He keeps rocking into you from behind, sweat dripping from his hairline. His lips connect to the side of your neck, sucking into your skin and you moan more. “I—”
Suddenly, his fingers find your clit, wet and messy as he rubs it with his usual skill that makes you feel even weaker. Brows pinched together so strongly, pleasure skyrocketing. “Come like this first,” He says in your ear, lips kissing down your neck again. “Come for me, fuck, want to feel you squeezing my cock.” Your hands go behind you, feeling the back of his head, fingers threading through his damp hair. 
He’s still fucking you so deeply, fingers bringing you somewhere so dangerous. Jungkook starts fucking even faster when he feels how you get tighter, your drawn out moans almost sounding like you’re on the verge of ecstasy. You’re saying words neither of you understand, eyes opening to glance down at his tatted hand at your pussy, fingers lost between your folds.
Your orgasm is around the corner, building up so nicely, your teeth digging into your bottom lip, shameless cries leaving your mouth as he pushes onto your clit harder. And that’s it. Your mouth falls open, heavy pants escaping as you start coming. You come and come, squeezing his cock and he groans loudly at the feeling. 
“Fuck, yes.” He moans for you, “You’re amazing, baby…keep coming for me.” He keeps fucking into you, your body so tense as you continue to come around him. You’re unable to make another sound. Lips parted, breaths erratic. Vision blurry. Your body goes limper, growing so weak as Jungkook holds you up. 
“Jungkook.” You moan his name, “Fuck…” You drag the word through your teeth, your grip on his hair loosening. He slows down his thrusts, kisses on your neck and shoulder. Jungkook eases you back to the mattress, his chest still sticking to your back as he keeps fucking you, slower, deeper. You’re dizzy again. His cock is making you dizzy. 
“Let’s turn you around again,” He kisses the back of your shoulder before rising from your body, cock momentarily leaving your hole as he tries to flip you over carefully. You’re tired. Fucked out. Eyes so heavy but lust still lingers. He’s at a loss of words because he’s never seen you look this incredible. “Are you losing yourself to me, y/n?” He whispers before sliding his member back into you, making your eyes open wider, your hands going to his chest, fingernails digging into his skin. 
“You’re…” You struggle to speak, “Not done with me, are you?”
“No.” He leans down, kisses your parted lips. He grabs your leg and lifts it to his shoulder, his cock sliding deeper than before. You gasp, eyes stinging again. “You’re going to cry for me.” And then he’s moving into you, faster, deeper, rolling his hips as he struggles himself. He’s so close, closer than close. He’s going to come. But he needs you to come again first. 
“Fuck, Jungkook…you’re—” His fingers are back on your clit and you slam your eyes shut.
“No,” He leans forward, rocking into you with enough force. “Look at me.”
You struggle to pry your eyes open, tears filling them because you think you’re going to explode. Your body is on fire, flames surrounding you both. He gazes into your teary eyes, an excited but endeared glint can be seen before he’s kissing you. Lips devouring yours as he fingers work so expertly and you’re whimpering into his mouth, a few tears sliding down your cheeks as you come again.
Jungkook pulls away, his own eyes heavy, “Good girl.” He moans, his hips slapping into you before he’s groaning loudly. “I’m coming.” He cries out, hips stilling. You feel dead but you still manage to wrap your arms around his back, fingers stroking his skin as he comes. 
His face is barely distanced from yours, his hot, heavy breaths fall to your lips. His entire expression so focused until he’s kissing you, smiling as he does so. His body losing all energy as well before he’s struggling to hold himself up. You both wince the moment he begins to slip his softening member out from you, a soft whine leaving you both. Another peck to your lips before he rolls over your body, fingers on himself as he discards the used condom.
“Wow,” You murmur tiredly, eyes closed as you remain dizzy from everything. 
“I’m going to grab some water, we need some.” Jungkook says, still uneven breaths. “Just relax, don’t get up.” 
Well, you were not even planning on it. You don’t think your body is even capable of moving. Your limbs have retired, giving up and leaving you useless. You hum noncommittally, too tired to even drape your arm over your eyes to save you from the light. 
Jungkook isn’t gone long, you feel the bed dip near your side as Jungkook sits next to you. You crack open an eye and you see a tall glass of water in one hand. “Drink slowly.” He nudges the cold glass against your cheek and you groan. “Come on.”
Tired, you try to sit up a little, still dizzy. In multiple ways. “Okay,” You reach for the glass but he still holds on to it too, helping you sip the water. Almost instantly, your body and head start to ease from the dizziness. Damn, you really did need some. 
“How are you feeling?” Jungkook’s hand brushes against the top of your leg. “Are you feeling okay?”
“Yeah.” You glance at him before taking another sip. “I’m really tired though.” You chuckle at your own admission, “You really did a number on me.”
Jungkook grins a little at this, a brow lifting. “Did I?”
“Mhm.” You sink back down, head in the pillows.
“And how did it feel? Did you enjoy yourself?” He asks you, fingers still stroking your leg. “I didn’t cross any lines, did I?”
“No,” You weakly shake your head, “You made me feel really good…I enjoyed it. Enjoyed you.” You mumble quietly, eyes closing again. “I do feel kind of gross though…but god, I am so tired.” 
“Don’t worry, I came prepared.” He chuckles, hand leaving your leg to wave around a wet towel, despite the fact you aren’t looking at him. “We can shower when we wake up,” Then he looks down at the sheets. “But we should still change the sheets regardless.” 
“Good idea.” You whisper, “Help me up then.”
He smiles down at you, his hands going to your body to help you rise from the bed. He’s so gentle with you, his warm hands feel like your safe zone. You laugh because it almost tickles how weak you are, Jungkook keeps his hands on you. He passes you the towel as he starts cleaning up around the bed, replacing the sheets and all. You clean yourself up.
After everything is replaced and you’re both not totally gross…he hands you some boxers and one of his t shirts, you easily slide back into his bed, body relaxing against the fresh sheets. And then you get the shock of your life—Jungkook’s hands reach for you, his arm sliding beneath you before he’s pulling you into him. A content sigh leaving his mouth.
You blink at nothing, the dark room in sight but you’re still trying to process the cuddling. You two never cuddle in bed. Never. After sex, you’ve always just felt good enough to be near one another. But you ease into his body very naturally…his scent and touch enough to make you close your eyes again. If you’re honest, this kind of affection after the night you two have had, feels good. Feels right.
~
You wake up with the featherlike feeling of Jungkook’s fingertips outlining the curve of your figure, soft strokes on your hip. Your shirt is has ridden up, his hand coming from behind you as he touches you so innocently. You’re facing away from him, his body forming your own as he snuggles into you from behind. 
“Hi.” You speak groggily, turning in his embrace to face him. “You’re already awake?”
“Yeah.” He hums, eyes finding yours. “For a little while now.” 
“Oh.” You swallow, “Sorry…you should have waken me.”
“When do I ever wake you?” He smiles lazily, “I was just relaxing so it’s okay. But I am getting hungry…should we make breakfast?”
“Br—oh, yes.” You return his smile, “What should we make?”
“Lots of stuff. To…you know, replenish the rest of our energy.” He winks at you and you feel an undeniable heat creep up the back of your neck, spreading to your cheeks. “Come on.” 
It took more than one ‘come on’ for Jungkook to actually get you to get out of bed, but finally, you decided to get up and wash up before heading to the kitchen. Jungkook is already at the stove, eggs in a pan as he sings some tune. You step towards him, making it to his side and as soon as he feels you, he glances your way. 
“Can you make me a glass of water?” He asks you, eyes going down to the eggs.
“Sure.” You nod, about to turn away from him before you feel his hand on your lower back, you look at him and he’s leaning in, lips finding yours for a kiss.
“Thanks.” He mumbles against your mouth, “Should be done soon.” And then he turns back towards the stove, a satisfied yet soft smile on his face. You stare at his side profile for a moment, warmth enveloping you as you watch him. As always, he’s making your body react in ways that you don’t feel like finding an explanation for. Parts of your body that don’t require to be physically touched to feel good. Places like your heart but that sounds lame so you’ll push that thought away.
You shake your head a little, forcing your feet to move away from him. 
After a little while, you and Jungkook are sitting at his table with plates of food in front of you. He’s already digging in, mouth full and content hums as he enjoys it. You laugh a little, taking a few bites of your own breakfast. It feels nice. Just sitting together, eating, enjoying the company. The peace.
“So,” Jungkook lifts his big eyes towards you, a loud swallowing sound as he downs his food. “Can I ask you something?” He takes another bite of his eggs, chewing, waiting for your answer. 
You raise your brows a little, head nodding. “Sure.” “Your rules,” He says, still chewing. “Um,” He finally swallows. “Can you give me an actual explanation for why they exist? You know,” He lightly gestures between you both with tender eyes, “Between us.”
You gaze at him, sighing in defeat because it’s not like you can’t talk to him…him of all people. So, you slightly nod, shoulders shrugging. “Expectations. Disappointments.” You say simply, as if the two words go into a deep explanation. 
Jungkook narrows his eyes, frown on his face. “What about them?” 
“So there isn’t expectations.” You mumble, “You can’t expect anything from me…me for you. And no one can get disappointed.”
“I don’t really get it.” He admits, carefully.
“Example,” You exhale a deep breath. “Rule number 3. A rule you always break, by the way!” You playfully roll your eyes, small smile on your face before your lips drop. “Say I get used to it. I would start expecting it, wouldn’t I? Then I would start overthinking if you suddenly just stopped.” You shrug again, “I don’t know, that philosophy works for all the rules I think.”
“Oh.” He subtly nods, eyes going down to his food before he’s eating again. He’s quiet as he eats, chewing as he thinks. 
“Anyway—”
“—You think we would end up disappointing one another somehow?” He swallows his food, eyes going back to you. “Isn’t that a really negative way to think about it?”
“Negative or realistic?” You chuckle bitterly, “That’s life, Jungkook.”
“That’s not life, actually.” He furrows his brows, clearly concentrating his attention on you. His gaze makes you feel smaller. But then he brushes it off, small smile before he’s going back to breakfast. “Sound like you already have expectations, y/n.” 
“I don’t—”
“—It’s not a bad thing,” He assures you softly. “And for the record, you wouldn’t disappoint me. Not when it comes to the rules.” Jungkook tells you, “It’s funny…sometimes you lack confidence,” Then he smirks. “Yet you still know how to act so cocky.” He lifts a thumb to the corner of your mouth, “You’re cute. But let’s work on that.”
He watches you, lips curved into the cutest smile as you give him the middle finger. His insides are melting, turning into gooey liquid and he’s wondering, truly wondering, if this is something he can actually do. His smile only grows and his heart only beats faster when you stick your tongue out and go back to your food. 
Yeah, he isn’t so sure he’s cut out for this. Because this just might not be enough. But he doesn’t want your ‘expectations’ and ‘disappointments’ to make sense. Because he is the one most understanding how they make absolute perfect fucking sense.
~~~
“I am crazy proud of you, dude.” Taehyung is still hugging you tight to his body, “You’re going to do amazing!” He still does not let go. He rocks you back and forth and his arms are wrapped so tightly. “Proud, proud, proud!” He chants.
“Okay, okay.” You laugh into his chest, patting his back. “I get it. Thank you, thank you.”
“I’m proud of you too, y/n. I’d also give you a hug but Taehyung might start barking and growling at me or whatever.” Yoongi tells you with a gummy smile. “Still, accepting your promotion is a huge deal.”
“Of course it is a huge deal.” Namjoon takes a seat at the table that the server just brought you all too, “Hence why we are celebrating.”
“Sorry that only we could make it, y/n.” Jimin pouts, taking a seat next to Namjoon. “Jin and Hoseok feel terrible about not being able to come.”
“Ah, it’s not a big deal.” You keep patting Taehyung’s back. “Okay, let go of me already, dude.” You tell him but he doesn’t let go of you fully, just placing you at arm’s length.
“See? I was being hard on you because I needed you to open your eyes! Now look how excited you are about this promotion!”
“Yeah, yeah.” You roll your eyes, “Right.”
“You don’t believe me?” He cocks a brow at you, “You know what they say about me. I have a method for everything, y/n.”
“Totally, totally.”
“For real though…” Taehyung gets more serious, “You’re going to love this new position…you were made to shine like this.” He smiles now, finally dropping his hands. “What did Jungkook say when you told him?”
“He’s proud too.” You smile, “He should be here any minute…Ara too.”
“Oh.” Taehyung smirks to himself, “Ara, Ara. The love of my life.”
“Stop.” You glare at him, “You just like that she hates you.”
“Hates me?” He pretends to look shocked, “She’s totally in—”
“—Finish that sentence and I’ll consider murder. Super planned out, never get caught kind of murder.” Ara cuts in, heavy sigh leaving her mouth as she walks between you both. 
“That’s so flattering,” Taehyung puts a hand over his heart, “You’d plan something that meticulous for me? You’d spend that much time on me?”
“Something is seriously so wrong with you.” Ara shakes her head.
“Yet is does it for you, doesn’t it?” He grins at her.
“Anyway,” Ara turns to you, giving you a quick but tight hug. “Congrats on the promotion!”
“Thanks, thanks.” You tell her, gesturing towards the table so you can all sit with everyone else. “I was so nervous when I was going to accept it! Ah, but when my boss came to check on another project…I kind of just blurted out that I would take it.” 
“Seems like your subconscious made the decision.” Ara laughs, taking a seat next to you.
“I guess so.” You giggle, “He says I can give the main presentation tomorrow to one of our teams as like a test run. So I was preparing all day!”
“You’re going to kill it!” Taehyung takes a seat next to Ara, “And—”
“—Why me?” She groans, “Sit on the other side of y/n.”
“Uh,” Taehyung gives Ara a pointed look. “Jungkook is going to want to celebrate right next to our promoted princess.”
“Oh yeah.” Ara blinks, head nodding. “So true.” 
“Jungkook would survive not sitting next to me guys.” You deadpan.
“I don’t know,” She shrugs. “Even yesterday when we met for drinks…Jungkook didn’t want be anywhere if you weren’t right there.”
“T-That’s not true.” You defend, cheeks heating up.
“It is true.” Taehyung says nonchalantly, he and Ara share a look, “Childhood friends are close like that.” He nods, “I’m actually going crazy because I’m not right next to y/n either.” Taehyung offers a very straight face and Ara returns it.
“I can imagine.” She nods.
“You guys are annoying.” You laugh, “But speaking of Jungkook…” You pull your phone out, “He’s taking forever. Oh he called. Let me send him another—”
“—Well, maybe I would have been here earlier if you would have told me where this table was located! Or you know, answered my calls.” Jungkook suddenly has his hand on the back of your chair, “I’ve been searching for you guys everywhere.”
“Hey man.” Yoongi nods up at Jungkook.
“My bad…” Jimin looks at his own phone, “Didn’t feel my phone.”
“You’re here.” You turn your head to look at him, bright smile. He immediately looks down at you and he returns your smile. 
“Hi.” He says, eyes only on you now. “Congratulations.” He grins, hand going to your shoulder as he squeezes it gently. “I’m really happy for you.” 
“Thank you.” You answer, hand patting the seat next to you. “I’m a little nervous.”
Jungkook sits next to you, his fingers itching to give you comfort but he is trying to respect rule number 2. “That’s normal. But you’ll be great.” He assures you with just words instead. You gaze at him, eyes clearly still holding some doubts but you take a long, deep breath before leaning into him, head resting on his shoulder.
“If you think so maybe I will be.” You tell him, trying to gain some confidence.
“You will be.” He tells you quietly, a little surprised you’re leaning against him so openly but what really shocks him is when your fingers find his on his lap, you grip them softly before you lean away from him again, your attention on Ara when she says something. But your hand remains on his.
Jungkook tries to breathe normally. It isn’t a big deal. But these sudden nerves remind him of the first time he ever kissed you when he was 14 years old. All nerves and no chill. He clears his throat, his hand giving yours a gentle squeeze as he tries to join in on the conversation Namjoon and Yoongi are having. But then, you pull your hand away to reach for a water the server just brought as you continue chatting with Ara 
He hates that he feels disappointed. 
Oh. Wait. No…he gulps, throat drier than before.
He stares at nothing for a moment, trying to rid that thought with the shake of his head. “Jin and Hoseok couldn’t come or?” He asks Namjoon.
“Jin is on a business trip until Monday and Hoseok is sick.” Yoongi answers for him. “Hoseok wanted to come anyway but he sounded horrible on the phone.”
“Eh, probably for the best then.” Jungkook chuckles. He glances around the table, watching how Namjoon and Yoongi continue to talk, Jimin and Taehyung chatting about going out this weekend and Ara telling you about some guy. 
He stares at your side profile as you speak, your hands moving around animatedly, words falling from your mouth…something about how this guy is funny and cute…and then he’s noticing an uneasiness. What guy? Expectation and disappointment lingering as he tries to listen more carefully.
“You guys really seem to get along,” You continue, “A perfect match!” 
Oh. Jungkook relaxes. You’re talking about the guy for Ara. Disappointment averted. Expectation rising. He continues to gaze at you, a lazy smile starts growing on his lips as he watches and listens to you. You’re so cute. Pretty. Bea—everything. He wishes you’d believe him more when he says that to you. He rests his chin in his hand as he keeps staring.
“You’re so pretty today.” He suddenly blurts. You whip your head towards him, blinking repeatedly before you snort.
“Oh.” You laugh awkwardly, “I look the same as usual.” 
Ara and Taehyung look at you both as well. “So you’re pretty every day.” Ara sings out.
“Well, according to Jungkook.” Taehyung whispers towards Ara and she swats his arm and he pretends he’s wounded, chuckling to himself. “But anyway, Ara…” He pouts at her. “Who is this guy you are even seeing?”
“Someone who really likes me.” She grins at him, proud glint in her eyes. But Taehyung squints at her.
“But you like me.” 
“Nope.” She raises her nose in the air, “Not a chance.”
“So,” You eye Jungkook over, “You think I’m pretty today?” You ask him, voice directed only towards him as everyone chats. He doesn’t doubt the blush on his cheeks.
“You know this already.” He tells you, “But I still like telling you.” 
It’s like his words are the match that lights a fire to your skin. You try to conceal an undoubtedly shy smile. Hating that like usual, he gives you such reactions. “Then thank you.” You mumble, still trying not to smile. You lean into him again, hand landing on his thigh. “Sometimes I can tell you aren’t teasing.” You say playfully, fingers squeezing his muscular thigh before bringing your hand back to your own lap. 
Jungkook feels the absence of your touch again. And again, he’s disappointed. And then your words on expectations ring louder than ever. He finally gets it. Because he wants to expect this—your touch, words, anything. He wants that and he’s disappointed otherwise. He hates that you were the one with the worries but all along he’s the one understanding them.
“You’re affectionate today.” He mumbles quietly, eyes locked on yours. You raise your brows a bit, trying to think about it when you smile, looking a little embarrassed.
“Sorry, sorry…I didn’t—”
“—It’s okay. It’s kind of a relief I’m not the only one who broke a rule today.” He says, eyes looking a little more distant as he stares at you. “But…” He looks down for a moment, brows furrowed. “I think I broke a whole new rule. Well, I’m admitting it but it’s probably been broken.”
You study him, confusion falling onto your features, “What do you—”
Suddenly, his eyes rise again and he looks more determined. “Can we talk? Outside?”
You blink a few times, mouth fallen open. “Now?” You look around, “But—”
“—Please.” He says the word softly. 
“Okay.” You sense how serious he is about talking so you agree. You excuse yourself from everyone else with Jungkook following. You both head outside of the restaurant, finding a quiet and empty spot on the side of the building. Jungkook leans against the wall, his eyes so focused on your face.
“So?” You sway into the wall as well, “Is everything okay?”
“I don’t know.” He takes a breath, “Maybe?”
“What’s going on?” You take a one step towards him and his hands want to reach out for you but he controls them.
“I broke all of the rules.” He tells you simply. His eyes serious, with the slight furrow of his brows. “Every single one.” 
“What?” You ask, looking genuinely confused. He can’t help but crack a smile, a weird relief flowing through his veins…because you’re just you.
“I had a hunch I was breaking it but I I’ve confirmed it.” He smiles at you. “Rule number one, I broke it a while back. I told my mom.” He grins now while you gape at him.
“What?!”
“Not a big deal,” He shrugs, “She liked the whole idea.”
“Jung—”
“—I guess I broke the second rule a few times. Rule number three, I clearly just didn’t believe in that one. Rule number four, first of all, fuck that rule.” He keeps smiling at you.
“You break it!” You scold him.
“Thank god that I do.” He shrugs again, devious smile on his face but then he softens considerably. “And rule number five,” He takes a deep breath. “I broke that one too. I’m breaking it now. It might even be the first rule that I broke.” 
You process all his words very slowly. Starting from the beginning…but your brain is catching up. You don’t even separate your lips. They stay glued to one another as you look at Jungkook with pure confusion. 
“I know you don’t really get it.” He says softly, lips spreading into a barely there smile. “Since you’re such a stickler for the rules.” 
“Are…” You finally try to speak, head shaking a little. “Are you saying you …?”
“That I have feelings for you?” He looks up at the night sky, “Yeah, breaking rule number five would mean that, wouldn’t it?”
“Jungkook…” You say his name slowly. 
“I know. I get it.” He looks back at you, nothing but a content expression. “But for obvious reasons we should stop this fun little arrangement because I was right…” He chuckles, “I am not cut out for it.”
“Then—”
“—And please don’t hate me. I want to stay and celebrate but I also want to give you some space to think and process and what not.”
“Process?” You blink at him.
“I don’t really know. Maybe it’s me…is it okay if I go home for now? I promise,” He looks at you sincerely, “This won’t change our friendship, y/n. But can I have just a couple days to work through it by myself?” 
You really don’t know how to respond. Your throat feels dry. You only nod at him. 
And just like always, he makes you entire body react. Including your fucking heart.
~
You’re sure everyone could tell you were acting strange during your celebratory dinner. It doesn’t take a genius to understand that after Jungkook left you got into a down mood…no one knows why, of course. You still tried to have fun with your friends despite the giant hole that’s broken your chest apart. 
You told everyone that Jungkook had a sudden work thing he had to take care of and they bought it—well, you think so anyway. Doesn’t matter. It’s now almost 11pm and you’re trying to focus on tomorrow’s presentation but Jungkook is the only thing you’re really thinking about. You keep opening and closing your laptop, thinking maybe you’ll get something done but you keep glancing at your phone. You need to talk about this.
Finally, you reach for your phone, fingers poking at the screen harshly as you try to make the phone call you are trying so desperately for. Ringing. It’s ringing. Still ringing. Words risen from your throat, so close to spilling shamelessly from your mouth. You take a deep breath…you need an answer.
“Hello?” Finally.
“I lied earlier.” You blurt quickly, needing to get things off your chest now.
“Hm,” Ara hums out softly, “Let me guess?” 
“You won’t—”
“—Just get into why Jungkook left earlier. Wasn’t for work, so…?”
“Oh.” You grip your phone a little tighter, pushing it against your ear. “You knew I lied about that?”
“I didn’t think you were so freaking sad just because he had to leave for a work thing.” Ara chuckles softly, “You’re more easy going than that.” 
“I wasn’t that sad.” You keep your voice even.
“You took two bites of your food, y/n.” Ara says with the kind of tone that you know she rolled her eyes. “What happened?”
“God, okay.” You sigh out, “Remember how you thought…or you know…you know how I’m hooking up with someone?”
“I do know that, yes.” She responds calmly. “You’ve been seeing someone for a little while now.”
“Well,” You take another deep breath. “I’ve been sleeping with Jungkook. Since the night of the dare…when Taehyung made—”
“Yeah, I know the night.” She laughs into the phone, “We knew it was going to turn out like this.”
“Yeah, so—wait, what?” 
“What?”
“What do you mean?” You ask her slowly, “Knew what?”
Ara is quiet for a moment before you hear her release a long breath, “It’s not like we didn’t know.” She says.
“Who the hell is ‘we’?” You furrow your brows, phone pressing closer to your ear. “Ara?”
“Hmm,” Her voice is light and airy, “Well, you know what they say about Taehyung.” 
Your brows only pull together closer…what does that mean? You try to think about it because what do they say about—oh. Your mouth falls open as realization hits you. “That he has a method for everything.” You say, putting it together now. 
“Mhm.” Ara laughs faintly, “So I’m probably not the one you want to be talking to. You thought cupid was a little angel baby. But he’s actually a tall, hot devil. Anyway, I’ll leave you to it.” 
“Wait—”
But she hangs up as you hear her laughing on the other side. Wait, wait, wait. You want more time to think and process what she just said but your fingers are moving faster than your brain.
“Hey,” Taehyung answers on the second ring. “What’s up—”
“—Are you home? I’m coming over.” You rush to speak, legs already moving as you find your bag and keys. “I’m leaving now.”
And not even 20 minutes later you’re standing outside of Taehyung’s front door, foot tapping against the ground as you not so patiently wait for him to let you in. You feel like you have waited an eternity but the reality is probably around 15 seconds. But finally his door swings open and Taehyung is here.
“Hello…” You narrow your eyes at him, speaking slowly. “Cupid.”
Taehyung’s eyes go wide before his lips settle into an annoying ass smile, smug and knowing. “Oh?” He crosses his arms over his chest before continuing, “I’ve been found out?”
You squint even harder at him, lips set into a firm line before you push past him, making your way inside his place. “Please explain to me whatever the hell Ara said about you.” You walk inside, getting comfortable on his loveseat. But then you tilt your head, “Why does Ara know? You told her?”
Taehyung closes the door before following you inside, “Uh, I praise Ara all the time for her incredible intuition. Her and I would make the smartest fucking kids.”
“You know what…whatever. Just explain to me what she means when she says you have a method for everything.”
“Well, where to start?” He asks, voice all cocky before he sits next to you.
“Uh, the beginning. So the day I got dumped. The night you dared—”
“—You think that’s the beginning?” Taehyung cuts in, laughter threatening to erupt. “Oh wow, no.” He shakes his head, “I’ve been playing the long game.”
“What?” You look at him incredulously, “What does that even mean?”
“It means you guys are dumb and I’m the best friend ever.” He says lightheartedly.
“You are the last person I would think would play cupid, Taehyung. You don’t even like romantic love!” you shout at him.
“But you guys do!” He shouts back. “Um, news flash, you guys are my best friends and I wanted to help out.” He shrugs now, “It all started back when Jungkook was 14.”
“Huh?” You blink at him, mouth open. Not totally getting it.
“Oh, poor Jungkook had the hugest crush on you, y/n.” Taehyung shakes his head, eyes down at his hands, looking solemn. “It was genuinely tragic because you didn’t even register he was of the opposite sex.”
“For real?” You deadpan.
“For real.” He nods, still solemn before he lifts his head and smirks. “But I had a genius plan.”
“The fucking first kiss.” You tell him.
“Yup, so genius.” Taehyung looks proud, “He still hadn’t had his first kiss because only lips he was thinking about was…” He pretends to gag, “…yours…” 
“Shut up.” You roll your eyes, “But continue.”
“Anyway, I told him we should just ask you!” He gestures towards you, “It’s not like it was a big deal to you anyway. He was like guy number 4 for you.”
Your cheeks grow warm, “Well...”
“So yeah. Genius plan. But I didn’t know you were going to stick your tongue in his mouth and I didn’t know he was going to bite you.” Taehyung cackles, shrugging his shoulders. “Classic, classic.”
“Oh god…” You feel yourself grow embarrassed.
“Anyway, you vowed you’d never do that again and poor Jungkook was so traumatized from your reaction but well,” Taehyung shrugs again. “At least he got over you for a little while.”
“Taehyung—”
“That’s when I helped Jungkook.” Taehyung leans back onto his sofa, “I helped you the night I made you guys make out.” 
“What are you talking about?” You ask him slowly, body tense but you try to mirror his body as you lay back into the couch cushion as well.
“I was helping both of you actually.” He chews his lips for a moment, “God, I would have done so earlier but you kept wasting your time with guys you didn’t even like. Jihoon, for example.” 
“Oh.” You nod subtly, piecing it together.
“It was pretty obvious you two started hooking up after I dared you guys to make out.”
“How was it obvious exactly?” You eye him suspiciously. 
“First, goodness gracious, the sexual tension was…” He brings his pinched fingers to his lips and gives them a kiss. “And also, I have both of your locations. You were always at his and he was at yours…especially at 2 in the morning…technology wasn’t on your side.” He says with a straight face.
“Damn…it never is.” You say with an equally straight face. 
“So…you guys are…” He motions his hands around.
“Yeah, we were hooking up, Taehyung.”
“Were?”
“I had five simple rules.”
Taehyung looks at you, almost comically ashamed. “Should have guessed.”
“Rule number one, no one can know.” You begin listing them, “Rule number two, no pda. Rule number three, no pet names. Rule number four, not often, just three times a week.”
Taehyung looks at you with obvious disapproval before he silently mouths, ‘lame as fuck’. But you continue, “And rule number five…no feelings.” 
“Okay…” He says slowly.
“He broke all of the rules. All of them. He told me.”
“…Okay.” He says slowly again, as if waiting for the point. “Is that supposed to be bad?”
You stare at him before snorting, “Uh, it’s weird! We’re best friends and now he apparently…it’s weird, right?”
“Uh, you guys are already fucking. Not sure it could get—”
“—I’m serious!”
“I’m serious too!” Taehyung starts laughing. “Y/n…be honest. You broke all the rules too at some point, right?”
“Well,”
“And if I helped you out doesn’t it just mean I’ve known about your feelings before you? Stupid, stupid.” He keeps laughing. “y/n, you broke that fifth rule before you even created it.”
“What?” You look at Taehyung, disbelief on your features. “I did not…well,” You suddenly glance to the side, teeth nibbling into your bottom lip. “Well, I don’t…I don’t know.”
“You do.” Taehyung shrugs. “You know exactly when you realized your feelings for him. Right?”
“No?” You blink at Taehyung, restless eyes now darting all around his living room. “Do I?” You question yourself quietly. “Oh…” You begin to chew on your lips again. “If I had to guess—”
“—You made those rules because like usual…you put restrictions on yourself.” Taehyung cuts in, his voice much softer now. Not much of his usual playfulness. “But the rules don’t matter, y/n. Jungkook was honest with you. Why don’t you try being honest with yourself as well?”
“Are you…” You look at Taehyung, choosing to be careful with your words when you decide you don’t want to be careful with them. “I have feelings for Jungkook too and I should tell him.”
“Well, yeah.” Taehyung chuckles, “He would probably like that.” 
“I…” Your body goes limp against the cushion. “Honestly, you’re right but wow, I felt like this would be a bigger revelation.” You mumble more to yourself. “Why doesn’t it feel like I just realized something so insane?”
“Because you realized it years ago.” Taehyung answers you carefully. “You aren’t dumb, y/n. You know exactly when your feelings shifted…I saw it happen but after that it was lame guy after lame guy.”
You stare at the floor, teeth still digging into your lips. “Yeah, maybe.”
“You already know how he feels so isn’t it easy to just…tell him too?”
“Not really.” You sigh out, “I don’t have the confidence to tell him anything to make it all make sense.”
“It’s Jungkook…” Taehyung conceals a smile. “He gets you, no matter how much your ass doesn’t make sense."
~~~
You almost cannot believe it. You killed that presentation. Your boss sat at the end of the table, eyeing you with pride as you spoke so smoothly, going over the presentation like you knew the ins and outs with such expertise. Probably because that’s true. You were awesome, it’s true. You spoke clearly, smoothly and did the right things to keep everyone engaged.
“I knew this was going to be the perfect fit, y/n.” Mr. Kim tells you, big grin on his face. “You were a natural in there and you really know how to lead the team. I got a few new projects I want you to work on…I know you’ll do incredible.” And then he’s giving you a pat on the shoulder before heading to his own office.
You take a seat at your desk, legs shaking in obvious excitement. You can’t contain it. All the praises and the high you feel from presenting in front of a room of a dozen people is so fresh and contagious. Your entire body is tingling and you feel such a sense of motivation. The confidence is continuing to sky rocket and the only place you want to put this energy is into Jungkook. 
It's Friday and you aren’t sure if he has plans or not but you have decided to go straight to his apartment right after work. Taehyung was right…you know exactly when your feelings shifted and you know exactly how to word everything. The high you feel has suddenly given you the confidence you need…you’re going to wing it. But somehow you know it will all makes sense.
It’s after 5pm and you’re sitting outside of Jungkook’s apartment door. You aren’t letting yourself in because somehow that feels wrong at this time. But after checking his location you can see he’s still not home from work. It’s after 6pm now. He’s still not home. You check his location again and you see he’s at the store…probably grocery shopping. 
Almost 6:30pm when you start to feel anxious again. Too much time is passing and you’re growing further apart from all that confidence and motivation that was running through your veins earlier. You sit here, leg shaking in nerves now. Finally, you hear the distant ding of the elevator down the hall and you just know it’s him. You take a deep breath before standing up from the ground and leaning against his door. He comes towards his door, hands carrying several bags of groceries while he looks at you with big, doe eyes.
“y/n?” He says your name and you feel your muscles tighten. “Why…” He glances around, “Have you just been waiting here?”
“Yes.” You blurt, “I was waiting for you.”
He gazes at you with curious eyes before he lightly snorts, “Why did you wait out here? You should have waited inside.” He smiles now. “But uh, can you actually open the door. My hands are…” He lifts the bags with a sheepish expression and you immediately nod and turn to unlock the door.
“Umm, how was…” Your fingers are pressing against the key pad, “um, your day? How was your day?” You finally get the door open, holding it so Jungkook can slip through.
“It was okay.” He walks past you, his scent hitting your nose. He takes the bags into the kitchen and you follow him. He sets the bags onto the counter before facing you, his attention nowhere on the groceries. “How was yours?”
“Good.” You nod, “I did the presentation and it went so well and now I really need to talk to you.” You step closer towards him and he takes a step back, hands going to the counter as he leans against it.
“Oh, I knew it would go well.” He smiles, eyes sliding to the side. “You just needed a little—”
“—Not here to talk about the presentation.” You cut him off, taking another step. “I—”
“—Well,” His fingers grip the edge of the counter a little, “What exactly—”
“—Rule number one.” Another step, eyes boring into his. “I broke it when I went on that double date.”
Jungkook blinks at you, looking caught off guard. “Huh?”
“Told my date about you. Me and you.” You lift a second finger, “Rule number two, I broke that rule numerous times, didn’t I? First time was when we went to the movies with Jimin and when he wasn’t looking I kissed you. It was in public so I broke the rule. And last night…” You sigh, small smile on your lips. “Broke it again without realizing.”
“What—”
“—Rule number three, I broke that rule the night we were celebrating Jimin’s new found singleness.”
“Or you know, mourning his new found sadness.” Jungkook cracks a smile.
“Oh, right.” You nod, “Sorry I guess Taehyung wore off on me.”
“It happens.” He chuckles, “But—”
“—Rule number four. I broke that rule every single time you wanted me to. You’re right, that rule is the stupidest one.” You smile wider now. “Three times a week? What was I thinking?” You begin to make fun of yourself. “No wonder I didn’t really try very hard to keep you from breaking that one.”
Jungkook eyes you carefully, smile on his lips but it looks unsure.
“And rule number five.” You pause, taking a moment to take a deep breath as your eyes fill with sincerity. “I broke that rule a long time ago.” You admit to him and he scrunches his brows together, almost looks like he’s doubting you.
“Yeah.” You continue, “I broke it the day I graduated from University. The same day I tried to drunk kiss you.” You look at him with a serious expression now and he raises his brows in slight shock and realization. “I was devastated about my mom…but you made me feel like I could move past that sadness because you made me feel so much better.” You frown a little, “That night alone I realized if the only person in this entire world who cheers me on is you…then I could probably be happy about it.”
“y/n…”
“These rules were stupid excuses, Jungkook.” You take another step now. Your eyes going to Jungkook’s hands that grip the counter. “I’m sorry…” You watch as his hands fall from the counter and to his sides. “I was never a stickler for them…god, I am just as bad as you are.”
Jungkook stares at you with big eyes, his fingers twitching because he wants to reach for you. 
“Also,” You bite your lip, trying to stop a chuckle from leaving your mouth. “I have another confession.”
“What’s that?” Jungkook’s expression looks soft as his fingers finally go to your waist. Your body losing all of its tension as soon as he touches you. 
“You were also my first kiss.” Your entire face feels hot. “I lied about my other kisses…everyone else was always talking about it so…”
“Wow,” Jungkook’s fingers hold onto your waist tighter as his lips spread into a knowing grin. “That explains so much.” He teases you, “I mean…the sudden tongue in my mouth…”
“Hey!” You pout at him, “It wasn’t—”
“—Hey.” He cuts you off, fingers spreading over your blouse before his hands find your lower back and he’s pulling you closer to him. “If it makes you feel better, you’ve really improved.”
You frown theatrically at him before he starts really laughing now, one of his hands leaving your back to come to your face. “Really improved. Best in the world now.” He whispers, playful glint in his eye.
“You’re just saying that.” You roll your eyes, your own hands finding his chest. You splay your fingers across his shirt. “So,” You bite onto your bottom lip.
“So.” He strokes his thumb over your cheek. “I have feelings for you. You have feelings for me.” 
“Yeah.” You breathe out, eyes trailing across his face. “What does it mean?” You ask him slowly, carefully. Fingers right over his beating heart. His cheeks turn rosy as he gazes at you, a blush turning him into a pink dream.
“It means we have new rules.” He smiles, teeth poking out adorably. “Five to be exact. And we actually will follow these.”
You quirk a brow at him, “Which are?”
“One…we tell everyone. Everyone has to know you’re mine now. Officially.” He smirks at you, his hand guiding your face closer to his before he plants a kiss to your lips. “Two…I’m going to hold your hands, hug you, kiss you…all the time. Everywhere” Another kiss.
“Jungkook.” You laugh into his mouth before he pulls away again.
“Rule number three…all the fucking pet names. You’re my baby and I’m going to call you that all the time.” Another kiss. “Rule number fucking four.” His hand tightens over your jaw a little, “We are fucking all the time. Like, all the time.”
You laugh, eyes staying on his before he kisses your lips again.
“And rule number five…” He leans back a little, soft eyes gazing at you and you can feel your body react like usual. Heart going crazy. “You should probably go ahead and tell me you’re in love with me now. Have feelings.” He looks at you so lovingly before leaning in again, lips slow to find yours for a long kiss. You sigh into his mouth, heart thumping wildly. “And,” He barely pulls his lips off yours. “You can never break that rule. Because for once, I think we finally found some rules I could follow.”
You pull away from him, just a few fingers lingering on his chest. “You think you can finally listen to me?” You ask him, cocky tone in your voice. “We should put it to the test.”
The corn of Jungkook’s lip start to turn, crooked smile forming on his face. “Yeah? Go ahead and test it, baby. Tell me to do something. You know I would do anything you wanted me to.”
“You would, wouldn’t you?” You can’t help but smirk, front teeth digging into your bottom lip. “Okay,” You slide your fingers down his chest, eyes following as you start messing with the zipper on his pants. “You’ll really do anything I want?” Your eyes rise back to his.
His mouth falls open as he exhales a long breath, eyes already filling with desire. “Anything.”
“Hm,” You lick your lips, eyes glancing around. “Then put away your groceries.” You tell him with the nod of your head, “I can see there’s ice cream. Don’t let it melt.” And then you drop your hand from his body and turn to walk away from him.
Jungkook blinks at where you once stood. His mouth shuts and he conceals the smile that wants to spread so badly, “Fucking tease.” He huffs out, slightly shaking his head.
“I know,” You call out, stopping at the entry of the hallway, a hand on the wall. “But if you want more demands from me, you can meet me in the bedroom when you’re done.” You wink, disappearing into the hall.
“Cocky.” He talks to himself, rolling his eyes and turning his body towards the counter to start putting away the groceries. He chuckles, an endeared smile on his face, “But just like the new rules, I’d follow her to the ends of the Earth.” 
4K notes · View notes