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#always with you b <3 no matter what happens from now on
tipannies · 11 months
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BAEKHYUN EXO, LET ME IN (2023)
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harmoonix · 4 months
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Chill astro notes
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🔶 People need to stop blaming one specific sign when they get cheated/hurt/etc.. in love, let's use Sag Venus for this example, a lot of people blame Sagittarius Venus for being "cheaters" but truly that doesn't mean anything, because first you need to do a synastry chart instead of reading your partners chart. Synastry chart is at least 85% on the fault why some things don't work in a relationship astrologically talking.... Not the signs from their actual birth charts
🔶 - I personally love the dynamic of Venus in the 3rd/5th/7th/11th houses, because it shows how much love they hold for their freinds and how to share it together, for some of natives this aspect can also mean that you can have friends to lovers kind of thing or your lover can be your best friend
🔶 - I have a friend with Mars in the 6th house and he literally can't stay still. He always needs to do something, i guess the natives are full of energy and don't want to take a break..
🔶 - Capricorn Placements can end up to be workaholic, it's good to work if that gives you satisfaction, but most times a break is really needed because you're human after all
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🔶 - I honestly believe that Saturn with Pisces Degrees 12°, 24° have it hard when it comes to sleeping time, they can either have problems with sleep either with not sleeping enough
🔶 - The time when you'll have your Saturn return, which happens at least 2 times in a human life, it happens to be your most challenging/transformative years of your life because it will be the year where you'll need a lot of patience to go over the test of Saturn
🔶 - I always think about how life must have been in the 1960's cus' Uranus was in Leo at that time (precisely in 1962), it must have been something totally taken out of control
🔶 - Neptune aspecting Juno asteroid (3) can end up to dream about their soulmate or future spouse, if you don't dream then probably you'll receive some signs from the universe that you'll met someone
🔶 - Moon in the 6th/8th/10th/12th house > In case no one told you, I hope you have it good and without any stress or bad thought, you'll win all your battles
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🔶 - People with Lilith - Sun aspects could have been judged a lot in the past, but you need to stay like yourself no matter what because you don't have to change based on others opinion.
🔶 - On the other hand. Lilith harshly aspecting Moon don't give a single f about others opinion, you can say whatever they want and they would not care at all. Because they live for themselves
🔶 - Taurus Sun/Moon/Rising are actually very posesive, some of them can be more than Scorpios. But one thing about them is that they know how to hide it good enough so people don't observe that
🔶 - Aquarians claim to not get jealous easy, but you can see it on their face when they're jealous or possesive, or CLINGY they have it easier with their face expressions
🔶 - Nobody loves nature more than Earth suns, earth is their own heaven and special place, now you'll probably say "well they have the earth element!" It's actually because their love and humanitarian side to love the earth this much, makes them into this
🔶 - Aquarius Placements especially Sun/Moon/Rising they are not weird as people say, the thing is nowadays... it's popular to be like some celebrities so people forgot to be their true selves, Aquarius is the sign of difference, don't let people tell you otherwise
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🔶 - If your 6th house ruler is badly aspected you can have complications with your health. For example if your 6H house ruler is Saturn or Pluto you can get sick easier than others
🔶 - I want to believe that Pluto - Moon aspects can learn a lot of things from their mother. To learn for her mistakes so they won't do the same thing again and again, which is a very good thing because less families will have generational curses to break, I mean... go girl break that curse
🔶 - Natives with South Node - Jupiter aspects may want to know more about their past. Because Jupiter wants to expand this curiosity about their past lives
🔶 - I feel like 4th house natives really really really like to give hugs to comfort others, and its truly something very sweet because nowadays the world turned into a dark stage and people forgot what kindness means
🔶 - All people get hurt when they're betrayed but for natives with the Sun or Moon in the 11th house may take it too deep and they cannot accept that they were betrayed.
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🔶 - Pisces Sun/Moon/Rising/Venus love/like to watch a lot dramas with love, or is just me who saw that? I know so many people with those placements who like to watch love dramas
🔶 - 9th house is so less talked about and honestly is a very underrated house because is the house of luck and blessings.. yet people don't talk enough about it
🔶 - Neptune in the 8H/9H houses can get obsessed with crystals, and tarot too..they mostly adore witch things just like Neptune in those houses act like a little witch
🔶 - If you have placements/planets at 1° in your birth chart, you can change things on your own, because is the power of the magician tarot card who gives this energy
🔶 - Sag Placements love to hang out quite often, they're always for "let's go in this place" mostly because they're very curious souls who want to gain experience and memories
🔶 - If you have Vertex - Juno (3) in good aspects probably you're fated to met a good person who can change your life into better, it's actually sweet
🔶 - Gemini Rising/Gemini Sun/Gemini in the 5th house can get praised for their hands/ these natives are having really good looking hands and people appreciate that
🔶 - It's something I still study about but does it happen for Sun in Capricorn natives to have things like birth marks on their skin? Because Capricorn can rule over skin too and most people with Cap Sun that I know have marks on their skin (like a birth mark)
Check this out:
It shows what body parts all these signs rule over
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🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°🔶°
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With all the love and light, yours truly ❤️🔶❤️
Harmoonix ❤️
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physalian · 4 months
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Pacing your Story (Or, How to Avoid the "Suddenly...!")
Arguably *the* most important lesson all writers need to learn, even for those who don’t give a damn about themes and motifs and a moral soap box: How your story is paced, whether it’s a comic book, a children’s chapter book, a doorstopper, a mini series, a movie, or a full-length season of TV (old school style), pacing is everything.
Pacing determines how long the story *feels* regardless of how long it actually is. It can make a 2 hour movie feel like 90 mins or double the time you’re trapped in your seat.
There’s very little I can say about pacing that hasn’t been said before, but I’m here to condense all that’s out there into a less intimidating mouthful to chew.
So: What is pacing?
Pacing is how a story flows, how quickly or slowly the creator moves through and between scenes, how long they spend on setting, narration, conversation, arguments, internal monologues, fight scenes, journey scenes. It’s also how smoothly tone transitions throughout the story. A fantasy adventure jumping around sporadically between meandering boredom, high-octane combat, humor, grief, and romance is exhausting to read, no matter how much effort you put into your characters.
Anyone who says the following is wrong:
Good pacing is always fast/bad pacing is always slow
Pacing means you are 100% consistent throughout the entire story
It doesn’t matter as much so long as you have a compelling story/characters/lore/etc
Now let me explain why in conveniently numbered points:
1. Pacing is not about consistency, it’s about giving the right amount of time to the right pieces of your story
This is not intuitive and it takes a long time to learn. So let’s look at some examples:
Lord of the Rings: The movies trimmed a *lot* from the books that just weren’t adaptable to screen, namely all the tedious details and quite a bit of the worldbuilding that wasn’t critical to the journey of the Fellowship. That said, with some exceptions, the battles are as long as they need to be, along with every monologue, every battle speech. When Helm’s Deep is raging on, we cut away to Merry and Pippin with the Ents to let ourselves breathe, then dive right back in just before it gets boring.
The Hobbit Trilogy: The exact opposite from LotR, stretching one kids book into 3 massive films, stuffing it full of filler, meandering side quests, pointless exposition, drawing out battles and conflicts to silly extremes, then rushing through the actual desolation of Smaug for… some reason.
Die Hard (cause it’s the Holidays y’all!): The actiony-est of action movies with lots of fisticuffs and guns and explosions still leaves time for our hero to breathe, lick his wounds, and build a relationship with the cop on the ground. We constantly cut between the hero and the villains, all sharing the same radio frequency, constantly antsy about what they know and when they’ll find out the rest, and when they’ll discover the hero’s kryptonite.
2. Make every scene you write do at least two things at once
This is also tricky. Making every scene pull double duty should be left to after you’ve written the first draft, otherwise you’ll never write that first draft. Pulling double duty means that if you’re giving exposition, the scene should also reveal something about the character saying it. If you absolutely must write the boring trip from A to B, give some foreshadowing, some thoughtful insight from one of your characters, a little anecdote along the way.
Develop at least two of the following:
The plot
The backstory
The romance/friendships
The lore
The exposition
The setting
The goals of the cast
Doing this extremely well means your readers won’t have any idea you’re doing it until they go back and read it again. If you have two characters sitting and talking exposition at a table, and then those same two characters doing some important task with filler dialogue to break up the narrative… try combining those two scenes and see what happens.
**This is going to be incredibly difficult if you struggle with making your stories longer. I do not. I constantly need to compress my stories. **
3. Not every scene needs to be crucial to the plot, but every scene must say something
I distinguish plot from story like a square vs a rectangle. Plot is just a piece of the tale you want to tell, and some scenes exist just to be funny, or romantic, or mysterious, plot be damned.
What if you’re writing a character study with very little plot? How do you make sure your story isn’t too slow if 60% of the narrative is introspection?
Avoid repeating information the audience already has, unless a reminder is crucial to understanding the scene
This isn’t 1860 anymore. Every detail must serve a purpose. Keep character and setting descriptions down to absolute need-to-know and spread it out like icing on a cake – enough to coat, but not give you a mouthful of whipped sugar and zero cake.
Avoid describing generic daily routines, unless the existence of said routine is out of ordinary for the character, or will be rudely interrupted by chaos. No one cares about them brushing their teeth and doing their hair.
Make sure your characters move, but not too much. E.g. two characters sitting and talking – do humans just stare at each other with their arms lifeless and bodies utterly motionless during conversation? No? Then neither should your characters. Make them gesture, wave, frown, laugh, cross their legs, their arms, shift around to get comfortable, pound the table, roll their eyes, point, shrug, touch their face, their hair, wring their hands, pick at their nails, yawn, stretch, pout, sneer, smirk, click their tongue, clear their throat, sniff/sniffle, tap their fingers/drum, bounce their feet, doodle, fiddle with buttons or jewelry, scratch an itch, touch their weapons/gadgets/phones, check the time, get up and sit back down, move from chair to table top – the list goes on. Bonus points if these are tics that serve to develop your character, like a nervous fiddler, or if one moves a lot and the other doesn’t – what does that say about the both of them? This is where “show don’t tell” really comes into play.
4. Your entire work should not be paced exactly the same
Just like a paragraph should not be filled with sentences of all the same length and syntax. Some beats deserve more or less time than others. Unfortunately, this is unique to every single story and there is no one size fits all.
General guidelines are as follows:
Action scenes should have short paragraphs and lots of movement. Cut all setting details and descriptors, internal monologues, and the like, unless they service the scene.
Journey/travel scenes must pull double or even triple duty. There’s a reason very few movies are marketed as “single take” and those that are don’t waste time on stuff that doesn’t matter. See 1917.
Romantic scenes are entirely up to you. Make it a thousand words, make it ten thousand, but you must advance either the romantic tension, actual movement of the characters, conversation, or intimacy of the relationship.
Don’t let your conversations run wild. If they start to veer off course, stop, boil it down to its essentials, and cut the rest.
When transitioning between slow to faster pacing and back again, it’s also not one size fits all. Maybe it being jarring is the point – it’s as sudden for the characters as it is for the reader. With that said, try to keep the “suddenly”s to a minimum.
5. Pacing and tone go hand in hand
This means that, generally speaking, the tone of your scene changes with the speed of the narrative. As stated above, a jarring tonal shift usually brings with it a jarring pacing shift.
A character might get in a car crash while speeding away from an abusive relationship. A character who thinks they’re safe from a pursuer might be rudely and terrifyingly proven wrong. An exhausting chase might finally relent when sanctuary is found. A quiet dinner might quickly turn romantic with a look, or confession. Someone casually cleaning up might discover evidence of a lie, a theft, an intruder and begin to panic.
--
Whatever the case may be, a narrative that is all action all the time suffers from lack of meaningful character moments. A narrative that meanders through the character drama often forgets there is a plot they’re supposed to be following.
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So.. I'm confused about something. If your beliefs in radical feminism say that trans people aren't valid in their feelings of being trans, what's stopping you from making bisexual people not part of the LGB? B stands for bisexual. What if their sexuality is just a phase? What if they are *actually* just heterosexual? For that matter what's stopping you from excluding YOURSELF from the community? At some point, you can't exclude any more people from a space that wasn't supposed to be gatekept to begin with! -Vero of CFC
You people always use that word “valid”. It’s absolutely meaningless post modern nonsense. Trans people feel that despite having a male or female body, their feelings about it change reality. I’m not telling trans people how they feel. Because you’re right, I can’t know that. What I’m telling them is that their feelings don’t change their bio sex. I’m telling them their feelings don’t supersede the rights and dignity of women. That’s not at all the same thing as being same sex attracted.
If I tell you that I am attracted to both men and women you can believe me or not. It doesn’t change my sexuality. You can’t know how I personally experience sexual attraction. But if I tell you I’m an Olympic Figure Skater, that’s something external and material. That’s something that either is or isn’t. And it doesn’t matter how true I want it to be.
This isn’t about people being invalid or valid. It isn’t about telling others I know better than them how they feel. It’s me telling them that their feelings don’t change material reality.
And we don’t get to sidestep reality because language is limited and imprecise. We create words to express ideas and categorize things so we don’t have to start every conversation from the ground up. Think of the quote “a rose by any other name”. The word ‘rose’ is made up but the flower it refers to exists in the material world. And you and everyone on earth could declare a rose a tulip but as long as people needed to specify they’d find a way to invent the word rose again. It’s why every 3 years your movement declares old terms verboten. MtF and FtM got used until people got mad it didn’t erase the reality of bio sex and people just used those terms in place of “male and female”. Then the same thing happened with AFAB and AMAB. Now we’re onto TME and no one knows what anyone is talking about because at the end of the day, people are male or female and no amount of “validation” or the right words erases that reality.
I am bisexual because I am attracted to both men and women. Lesbians are women exclusively attracted to women. Gay men are men exclusively attracted to men. Straight people are exclusively attracted to the opposite sex. The LGB community formed because the thing we had in common- same sex attraction- is punished in most societies. It absolutely was designed to gatekeep. It was a civil rights movement- not a secret club house. The LGB have no more moral responsibility to admit opposite sex attracted people than black activists have to include white or Asian people.
“Queer” has nothing to do with it. Demi flux genderoo aroallo fox kin have nothing to do with it. A group of men that believe their internal state of mind makes them literally a woman has nothing to do with it. You people overran a movement for same sex attracted people, convinced everyone to call our community a slur, and demand that we center heterosexual teens too immature for a relationship thinking that makes them the same as a Gay man.
I’m tired of arguing with 19 year olds that read too much mlm fanfiction that having short hair and wearing hoodies from the boys section doesn’t mean they’re gay men. I’m tired of arguing with those same girls that the 45 year old man with pigtails and a pink pinafore sucking his thumb and holding a dolly on social media isn’t a brave woman defying The Man. He’s just a pervert.
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urrockstar-xe · 3 months
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you are everything - j.m x fem!reader
posted jan 27th, 2024 3:15pm
anon asked: Hey, could u write this prompt: “I’m going to ask you something and you have to answer me honestly” for jj Maybank and Y/n fem reader. Maybe make it like an emotional scene like they are best friends and they got into a fight about her doing something dangerous idk, but it makes her realize jj loves her and then she asks the prompt like later that night.
sososo sorry for the wait love, i hope u enjoy.
use of Y/n, John B plays cupid/the mediator, swearing, not proofread.
masterlist
wordcount: 1.4k
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Things had always been rocky in terms of the ”what are we?” factor for you and JJ, it was fun in the beginning and as the hunt for the gold took over the Pogues’ lives it turned into something with more substance behind it. 
Your heart nearly left your chest every time JJ pulled one of his stunts, every time he would sit there and flirt with Kie, and every single time that he decided to sleep over at yours, claiming he was too tired to go all the way home or just to the chateau. 
Of course, you let him stay every time, why wouldn’t you? 
This last time things were different. You were in the hot seat, you had to prove just how much that stupid phrase meant to you.
Pogues 4 Life and Ride or Dies had grown to mean the same things.
The cards were laid out on the table and they spelled your name.
JJ insisted on you not going he had fought John B over it.
“If she goes in there alone she’s screwed, man!” JJ was angry, John B knew how much you mattered to him and agreed to it anyway “What if it was Sarah, huh?” 
“Don’t bring her into this, man” John B gave JJ a warning look as JJ scoffed and shook his head, his gaze shifted to the floor, almost ashamed of the words he was about to say aloud. 
“Anything, I mean anything happens to her, John B, and I will never speak to you again.” 
Yet he still spoke them, and with how much the two boys had conquered together they both knew every word as the truth, John B knew how risky it was to send you in to steal that artifact, although small you could be killed if found with it.
But John B needed it, and you offered.
“If I had told her no, she would’ve fought me, you know that.” John B said, a softer tone in his voice as he watched his best friend nod in response to his words. “I know she would have” 
Despite the protests from Pope, who had just been against the idea altogether, and JJ you still went in, walking through the dark museum while getting flashbacks to when JB and JJ convinced you to come investigate the abandoned house by the chateau in 8th grade.
You were all chased out by a scary man with a gun, it wasn’t loaded but 14-year-old you didn’t know that,  JJ and John B were cheering and hollering with all of their adrenaline on your way back while you focused on not having a panic attack.
You had felt all those feelings from when you were 14 all rushing back now,
But you did it, and when you made it out to the Twinkie and you were met with happy smiles and excited cheers you weren’t fighting off a panic attack, and you weren’t 14, and JJ was pissed.
~
JJ was fuming, 
You were confused because what does it matter?
It was barely a week ago that JJ had nearly killed himself while wrecking his motorbike but when you decide to sacrifice something it's bad?
“I have just as much on the line as you do JJ! What the hell is the difference?” Your tone had come off more tired than angry, a slight contrast to JJ’s 
“No, you don’t! See when I do shit like that it's okay because I’m not important but you! You are everything, Y/n, why would you even risk something so stupid like that?” JJ’s voice sounded exasperated.
An uncomfortable silence settled between the two of you as you thought about JJ’s words, you opened your mouth to respond but before you could he shook his head and left, left his backpack on the couch, and walked to the door. shook his head, and left. 
JJ just left the chateau, leaving you standing there alone to really think over whatever the hell just happened between you two.
“You okay?” the sound of John B’s voice snapped you out of the trance JJ left you in, turning to look at him as he stood at the entrance of the backdoor. 
“Yea- Yeah, I’m fine, yeah.” shrugging shoulders and repetitive words didn’t quite convince either of you as you sighed. “He’s being so weird about this, John B,” you said, giving up on the everything is fine, facade as you put your face in your hands. 
“He’s just protective over you, should’ve seen how bitchy he got with me when I let you go in there.” John B, sat on the old couch, watching you with sympathetic eyes.
John B knew why JJ was being like this because of course he does, he just wasn’t planning to share with the class. 
“JJ is never like this with the rest of the pogues, not even you! Why does he single me out?” Your gaze fell on JB as he looked up at you with a small smile and a shrug. “I honestly couldn’t tell you what it is but, I’ve only ever gone that hard for Sarah” His words sunk in as he stood up and went down the hall to his bedroom, leaving you with the aftermath of uncovering more questions.
You sat where John B had previously, repeating his words in your head, what’s that even supposed to mean? Is he trying to play the sneaky and ominous- Oh my god, he’s trying to play Cupid.
But it’s not like JJ’s in love with you or something, he just couldn’t be.
But
If he had been in love with you that may explain many things, especially his behavior, and oh my god, again.
“JB, I’m leaving!” You called out, standing up and grabbing both your own and JJ’s backpacks as you rushed out the door not wasting time on waiting for John B to say bye. 
JJ had taken off on his motorbike which made you seriously regret having your dad help him fix it right about now as you had to go on foot but at least you knew where he’d be. 
~
It had been a thirty-minute walk but finally, that old bike came into view just before the familiar blond did, he fixed his hat, picking it up and shaking his hair for a second before putting it back on. He didn’t notice until you sat beside him, JJ turned to look at you before looking back at the water. 
A few moments passed like this, silence settling between you as you both stared at the water, arms touching and breathing becoming synced up. “You’re just not super replaceable” JJ broke the silence first, nudging your arm ever so softly. “Yeah, but neither are you” you nudged him back, looking at him only to be met with him already looking at you. 
You sighed, eyes flickering over his face as his gaze fell to what you could swear were your lips. “I’m going to ask you something and you have to answer me honestly” Your voice was soft and quiet as you spoke, watching as JJ merely nodded in response. 
“Are you in love with me?” JJ’s whole body tensed at the question, he panicked, looking out to the water while thinking of an answer that wouldn’t take away every last bit of dignity he had left-
“Because I love you, JJ” You knew he was looking for an out and your genuine confession gave him one. He looked back at you as soon as the words settled in, “I just, I can’t-” JJ sighed, words stopping in his throat, eyes pleading with you to just understand, and of course you did.
Why would it suddenly be so easy for him to say out loud when he never hears it? 
“I know, J, just yes or-” “Yes, I am” he nodded so eagerly you couldn’t help but laugh.
“Good,” you nodded.
You leaned into his hand when it found your cheek, gently guiding your face to his own before finally kissing you. Soft and slow and full of unsaid words, you felt it still even when he pulled back and sucked in a harsh breath. “I love you” JJ whispered, as if he was scared of it because he was.
But as you pulled him back for another kiss, he couldn’t help but think maybe he wouldn’t be anymore.
But that wouldn’t stop your JJ from fighting anyone who allowed you to get in harm's way, including you.
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goldenroutledge · 10 months
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intimidated
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pairing: jj maybank x kook!reader
word count: 5.3k
summary: you’re there for jj when it matters most. (inspired by this post)
warning(s): sprinkles of angst, but fluffy in the end.
a/n: the song i had in mind while writing this was intimidated by kaytranada & h.e.r <3
jj maybank masterlist
© goldenroutledge || do not plagiarize, repost, or translate my work in any way
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JJ Maybank didn’t need handouts. As he told it, his independence was his most valuable asset. It’s what made him a pogue through and through. “Is freedom anything else than the right to live as we wish?”— An Epictetus quote JJ scribbled down, bored as ever in his freshman English class. His life motto condensed into twelve simple words, whether his newfound ‘freedom’ was out of his control or not. Either way, he played the cards he was dealt.
His friends— no, scratch that— his family, were his escape to comfort. A soft, pillowy landing from the nose dive that was his life. A foreign concept to him until he met John B, then Pope, then Kiara, then you. A refuge of safety, ironically enough, given the many times you all had looked death in the face.
Even though the pogues had already started wearing matching friendship bracelets that Kiara made by the time you came along, it was a smooth transition when you were welcomed into the group with open arms. By some more than others at first, given your kook status. But just as they’d embraced Kie, your initiation into the group was no different.
While it took time for JJ in particular to come around, his reservations were understandable. At first, you gave him his space and he gave you yours. Always letting him set the tone and lead the way.
As time went on, JJ soon decided he wouldn’t mind having you around him all the time, there was no going back. JJ loved to the point of no return, and it was incomparable to anything— or how anyone else could ever make you feel.
At times, he felt like that was all he had to offer. Nothing but fierce loyalty and protection over the ones he loves most. But you. To JJ, you were the fine line between hideaway and heaven itself. Even if he thought he may not end up there, he was sure that it would be you he’d meet at heaven’s gates.
Amongst any conflict or tension within the group, you always provided a safe haven for him to retreat to, though he had difficulty admitting it. In a way you had a solution for everything. Keeping tensions low and spirits high in the process. You were the original peacemaker of the group, before his precious gun came along.
Right now, it was almost all he could think about while he sat there, beer in hand, listening to John B and Sarah argue in the distance. How he wishes you were here, to ease his nerves and settle the anxiety simmering in his chest.
JJ hated this. He hated that nobody seemed to get along anymore. With all that was going on with the others, he wouldn’t even think to mention his problems. The looming eviction notice on his house, one of few things he had left on this island. While everyone’s lives continued to progress, JJ’s was at a standstill. No job, no parents, and now his friend group was falling apart at the seams. And with everyone else occupied these days, he was alone.
JJ, selfless as usual, would hate to bother you, no matter how badly he wanted to. He knew you’d have some inspirational shit to say to him. Though he’d poked fun at it sometimes, he’d never needed anything more right now.
The sound of footsteps came before JJ saw them, watching Sarah storm off and away from John B as he stood there, tense and silent.
JJ could be hot headed at times, that was no secret. He could understand his friends' quarrels to an extent. But he couldn’t look past the fact that you all were supposed to be sticking together, especially right now. When he said that nothing good could happen once you all returned to Kildare, he knew he was right. Call it a gut feeling.
-
Naturally, Sarah told you everything. Confidant, mom-friend, advisor— all titles bestowed upon you by your close group of friends over the years. You’d always tried to be as neutral as possible in times of conflict. Though in matters of the heart it was nearly impossible.
Days after her fight with John B, she found herself laying on your bed, venting all of her bottled up frustrations about him and the state of their relationship.
“I’m a mess, Y/n. I feel like such a mess.”
You looked at her sympathetically, knowing there wasn’t much you could do. Just listen, just be there in her time of need.
“So, I took my bag from the Chateau and I left. Kie’s parents told me I couldn’t stay, then I went to JJ’s and he wasn’t home. He’s working at Guffy’s again last I heard.”
You briefly glanced up at the mention of JJ’s name— and it didn’t go unnoticed by Sarah. Instead of divulging about it, she continued her rant.
“Then I was just wandering around, because it’s not like I had anything better to do. And who sees me drinking at Tiki Bar? Topper.”
“Topper?”
“Topper.”
You internally cringed at the mention of the Thornton boy. He was always nice when you saw him, nothing bad nor good to say about him. But you knew deep down he was Sarah’s achilles heel. He reminded her of everything she once had, the person she once was. Lately, you couldn’t help but crave some normalcy too.
“So.. what happened?”
She sighs heavily, dropping her hand across her eyes. “We went to Mase.”
“Alone?”
“We went with some people from KDC. The old crew, Kelce, Phoebe…”
“Is that it?”
“We made out.”
Sarah squeezed her eyes shut in fear of your reaction, knowing it’d probably show on your face before anything.
“Oh.” You swallowed back any judgment you might’ve had, compartmentalizing your love for John B and choosing to hear Sarah out. “And how do you feel about it?”
“Awful. I mean Topper has been so good to me lately with everything going on, he’s always there to pick up the pieces and I just feel bad. It was a mistake.”
“It can’t happen again, y’know. Not if you want to work it out with John B.”
“I do, I wanna work it out with him.” She urged. “And then the next morning we had breakfast. Kie came into the restaurant and saw us together and I think she got the wrong message. She said she’s staying out of it but I can tell what she’s thinking.” Sarah takes a deep inhale, and a deep exhale to follow. “What do I do, Y/n?”
It still baffles you at times that you’ve become the voice of reason. You hope Sarah doesn’t notice that you feel uneasy about the whole thing. “Just… be honest. Don’t let John B find out from anyone other than you. He’s gonna be upset but he has a right to be.”
The blonde sits up, crawls over to you and envelopes you into her arms. “Don’t know what I’d do without you.”
-
Sun reflected brightly off the boats docked at the marina, the two smoothie cups in your hand sweating from the sweltering heat. Your family's boat was kept here at Guffy’s; particularly when your parents weren’t in town to cruise around the island and daydrink with their kook friends.
At least you had an alibi, just in case you happened to run into JJ. The two medium strawberry banana smoothies you carried might need some explanation, though.
Ever since you all had made it back to the island, JJ had been hard to track down. He was rarely in one place for too long. So where else better to catch him than at work?
“Y/n? How are you doing today?” Billy questions from a distance away, putting on his friendliest smile for the daughter of his best clients.
“Can’t complain. Happy to be back.”
“And it’s good to have you back. Everything alright with the boat?”
“Oh yeah, everything’s fine, I just realized I left behind my favorite sunglasses.” You explained, hoping your excuse sounded authentic enough.
“Alright. You take care, now.”
“Actually… I was wondering is JJ around?”
“Maybank? He was here a few days ago.”
“Hm, I could’ve sworn he was working today.”
Billy sighs, eyebrows furrowing. “Listen, Ms. Y/l/n, I know you want to advocate for your boyfriend and all but JJ can’t work here.”
Confusion spread through your features this time as you genuinely had no idea what the man was getting at. You chose to not correct him when he’d mistaken you for JJ’s girlfriend.
“Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good kid. I know he wants the job back but Guffy put a pin in it. I’m sorry. Really not much I can do.”
You forced a polite smile on your face as the dots connected, remembering the melting smoothie you held in your left hand while your half-finished one remained in your right. The two of you exchanged brief goodbyes before you quickly left the marina.
If JJ really hadn’t been working at Guffy’s again, where the hell was he? His act of disappearing was unmatched, but so was your skill of guessing.
If a game of hide-n-seek is what he wanted, a game of hide-n-seek is what he will get.
-
Grass brushed against your ankles as you approached JJ’s home, your steps careful as you looked around for him.
Going to JJ’s home was forbidden. When Luke was around, that is. He was a phantom— an ugly, dark presence looming over the quaint home that would otherwise feel serene. The chirping birds in the trees couldn’t tell the difference.
You haven't been here many times. The times you had been here weren’t anything you nor JJ wanted to remember. The feeling of uncertainty creeped into your mind from your past visits. You never knew what to expect.
To your left, there was a beautiful, never-ending view of the water past the grass of the Maybank’s yard. You hadn’t noticed that before. This spot had probably seen some beautiful sunsets. In a moment of imagination, you almost pictured sitting there with JJ on the plush green, hand in hand, watching the warm hues of the sky melt into a dark night.
The caution tape wrapping around the wood of the house caught your interest as you made your way onto the porch, also noticing the eviction letter left on the door, moving closer for a better look.
“Y/n?”
JJ called out, appearing from around the corner of his home, startling you out of concentration as you re-read the notice again and again.
As if you didn’t come over to finally see him in the first place. Though you couldn’t speak— for once unsure of what to say. ‘Sorry you’re getting evicted?’, it just didn’t sound right. Then again it might’ve been better than standing frozen and staring at him, silently, like you were doing.
“What are you doing here?”
“I- um…. I brought you a smoothie.”
You held out the cup, approaching him and handing it to him. He stood there dumbfounded, eyebrows furrowed. His lips eventually pursed into a smile as a way to say thank you. This wasn’t the relaxed JJ you were accustomed to; nonetheless he was still the JJ you loved.
“Why are you here?”
“I told you. The smoothie.”
“You came all the way out here from your mansion on Figure 8 to bring me a smoothie?”
“What?” You scoffed, his tone dictating where the conversation was headed. Most likely nowhere.
“Go back to reading by your pool or something. You shouldn’t be here.”
“I haven’t heard from you in days, JJ. I’m just checking up on you.”
“So what? You touring around the Cut now? Delivering smoothies to lost pogues? Is Heyward’s your next stop?”
He resumed tinkering with his bike, and from the looks of it he was working rather aggressively— desperate to distract himself from the conversation at hand.
“I miss my best friend. Am I not allowed to miss you anymore? I mean it’s not like we were stranded on an island together… not knowing whether we would live or die!”
“Well, we’re not exactly a big happy family right now. You should know that.”
“Yeah. John B and Sarah are on some kind of break. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see you, that doesn’t have anything to do with us. I thought we were past the whole picking sides thing.”
“I’ve been busy.” JJ shrugs.
“Busy working? At the job you lied about having?”
His eyes snapped to yours immediately. Your heart clenched as soon as the words left your mouth, you didn’t mean to go too far. But at least you had his attention.
“What, are you stalking me now? Or did you hire a P.I. to figure that out?”
“Hilarious, JJ. I was at the marina earlier to grab something off my boat. Actually hoping I would run into you but, whatever.”
“Yeah. Whatever.”
A few moments of awkward silence lingered between the two of you, as you kicked a pebble around with your foot.
“I know you don’t owe me anything… but you could’ve just told me.”
He paused his movements, thinking about how he was going to respond.
“Tell you what? That I prefer mixed berry over strawberry banana?” He jested, smiling to himself.
“I’m not talking about the smoothie, idiot.”
His eyes drifted over to his home, knowing exactly what you were thinking, just afraid to acknowledge it.
“My problems aren’t your problems, Y/n.”
“And I know that. I just wanna help you, however you’ll let me.”
“Well, you can help me by not helping me. I’ll figure it out. Always do.”
“All I’m saying is you don’t have to figure it out alone. I’m here.”
At that, he dropped his tools, running tense hands through his hair. “But you aren’t here! You don’t have to live like this and you should be glad that you don’t!”
He raised his voice at you, frustrated. JJ was never good at putting his feelings into words, especially when it came to actually expressing them.
He didn’t know how he could tell you about everything. The worst day he’s ever had, the lowest he’s ever been. He couldn’t see a way in which he could tell you all of it and carry on the same. You were always a constant in his life. He needed it to stay that way, by any means necessary.
“That doesn’t make sense, JJ. What’s the point of having anything nice if I can’t share it with the people I love?”
The both of you were taken aback at what your explanation implied. In actuality, it took all of your power not to say those three words to him outright. But you couldn’t, not like this.
“You don’t have to pretend to care that much. I’m sure you can find another community service project to focus on.”
“Community service?” You chuckled emptily, baffled at his ridiculousness, though deep down you knew this was how he dealt with things. He simply didn’t know anything other than defensiveness. “That’s what you think this is?”
JJ closed his eyes in exasperation, wishing this conversation away. He could hear it in your voice, your feelings were hurt. Maybe not as bad as when your 8th grade crush asked someone else to the Valentine’s dance— but even a little was too much.
“If you’re gonna reduce our decade of friendship to me doing charity work, I guess there’s no changing your mind. I’m just wasting my breath.”
The words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to apologize instantly, but now he wasn’t sure if his apologies were something you’d wanna hear at the moment. He wasn’t sure if you’d believe him.
For all the disingenuous apologies he’d accepted over the years, he’d hate to put you on the receiving end of one. Even if his heart truly was in the right place, JJ couldn’t muster up the courage to show it.
“You don’t have to antagonize me. Because everything you’re blaming me for, it isn’t my fault. Just like this isn’t your fault either.” You gestured to the eviction notice at his door.
“Yeah.” He mumbled. “You’re right.”
“Say what you want about me, but I just wanna know that you’re okay. And if it’s an apology you’re looking for, you’re not gonna get it. I’ll never apologize for that.”
He nodded, unsure of what else to say. All he could do was try to understand.
Realizing he had no further comments, you turned your back to leave.
“Will I see you at the Chateau tomorrow?” You asked over your shoulder, hope remaining in your voice despite the uneasiness that remained between you two.
“Don’t count on it.”
“Alright, well… bye.”
JJ waves, before muttering a monotone ‘thanks for the smoothie’ as he watches you go.
-
Since returning to the island, it was an unspoken thing that you all were to meet up at the Chateau at some point. And with all the new developments in your lives lately, these meetings were much needed.
Pope handed you a beer as he came into John B’s living room, opening one of his own as he sat down beside you.
John B and Sarah seemed to be laying low, but it was clear they were back together or had come to some sort of resolution.
Kiara was going on about how much shit her parents had been giving her lately. They’d been hovering— watching over their daughter’s every move from the moment she set foot on the island again.
Pope told the group about how Cleo had won over Heywar in record time, much faster than John B or JJ. Pope’s parents simply wanted the best for him, and knew that the danger and mischief his friends came with couldn’t be productive.
“We’ve been best friends for what…? 13 years?” John B recalls. “And your dad can hardly stand the sight of me but Cleo won him over in a few minutes? How?”
“Are you surprised?”
“Not at all.” John B holds his hands up in surrender to Cleo, Pope smirking beside her as he witnesses the interaction. “Just confused.”
“I have many superpowers, John.”
“Apparently! Winning over Heyward is like, unheard of in this group. At least for JJ and me.” John B explains, sipping his beer.
“Speaking of, where’s he at?”
At the shift in conversation, you can feel several pairs of eyes fall upon you. All you can do is act as normal as possible, tipping off any of your friends always ends badly in the case of keeping a secret. Until the cat’s out of the bag, your friends will make it their personal mission to reveal whatever it is you’re hiding.
You raised your eyebrows, pretending to only catch onto their stares moments later. “Why’re you looking at me?”
“No reason. It’s not like you guys are secretly together or anything.” Pope mutters under his breath, catching a glare from you at his false claim.
“We’re not. I wouldn’t know where he is.”
John B hisses, pretending to shiver. “Is it a little chilly in here? Or is that just Y/n’s cold shoulder?”
You roll your eyes, further proving his point until Sarah chimes in, pondering if she should speak up about what she knows.
“I actually stopped by JJ’s the other day. He.. wasn’t home.”
“Oh yeah, didn’t he go fishing? Probably not back yet.” John B remembers.
“I don’t think he’ll be going home anytime soon.”
At this your eyes meet Sarah’s hazel ones, full of hesitation. You shoot her a look of ‘whatever you’re about to say, don’t’, and you hope she is wise enough to pick up on it.
“Why is that?” Kiara questions, confused.
“He got evicted.” Sarah blurts, regret spreading through her expression as she sees you react; you don’t react. And that slightly terrifies her.
“Really?” Pope asks in disbelief, though not too surprised. More so disappointed that his best friend had to endure this, silently at that.
“Yeah. When was the last time anyone’s heard from him?”
The group silently recollects for a few moments, Kie pulls out her phone to review her latest texts with the man in question.
Instead, you’re wondering how the hell Sarah even knew about this to begin with. How long could she know about this and just stay silent? Forget not telling the group, how long could she keep this from you? How could she not help her friend who was clearly in need of support?
“How long have you known?”
Sarah appears confused, wondering where your line of questioning is coming from.
“I- uh. After John B and I fought I went there, remember Y/n? I was hoping I could stay but he wasn’t home. That’s when I saw the eviction notice.”
“And you waited, I don’t know, a week to bring that up?”
“Y/n, it’s not like I intentionally kept this from you, okay? We know how protective you are over JJ.”
Her words strike a cord within you, already on edge regarding JJ Maybank because of your argument with him the day prior. It was still a sore subject, even more so made by having no one to confide in about it.
“It’s not about that, Sarah. You didn’t even have to tell anyone at all but you didn’t think to maybe find out if he’s okay? At the very least?”
“I was a bit homeless at the time, Y/n, sorry about that.”
“Oh, right. You were too busy hooking up with Topper to care about the well-being of our best friend? Good to know the bare minimum is impossible for you.”
Sarah scoffs, John B shakes his head in exasperation. Kiara stays silent mostly, being no stranger to your and Sarah’s sister-like fights. She couldn’t even disagree with you, though with her parents keeping her on lockdown it was hard to do anything about it. She wasn’t in a place to have an opinion.
Pope and Cleo shared looks, communicating wordlessly as they had grown to do. Being away at Heyward’s kept them out of the loop quite a bit.
“JJ will figure it out, Y/n. Relax.” John B reassured. Though he was defending his girlfriend, now that they were in a ‘good place’ again, you felt anything but reassured at his carelessness around the subject. You’d think of all of you, John B would understand the most.
“Relax? Why should I relax if JJ is in trouble? If anything, you’re too relaxed!”
“I’m sorry you feel that way but you don’t have to take it out on Sarah, this isn’t even her fault! Not all of us want to fight your battles.”
“If you had any sense left you’d realize this isn’t about me. This is about our friend, who I thought we all cared about. At least enough to share this kind of news. We’re talking about his well-being here, I mean he’s losing the house he grew up in and nobody seems to care about that?”
“If he wanted us to know, he’d tell us.”
“Like he’s ever going to do that! You know better than anyway that he won’t!”
“It’s not my problem.”
“Mhm. It’s a shame JJ’s busy solving all of yours.”
“Y/n, please. Can we just have a chill night?”
“Aren’t you supposed to be his ‘best friend since the third grade?’ Because you don’t fucking act like it.” You huffed, standing up to get rid of your beer can. At this point you were rambling to yourself, more than okay with the group hearing what you really thought about them and their carelessness for the situation.
“Indeed. Which is why I don’t need to force him to tell me shit, okay?”
“Why are you such an asshole, John B?”
“Y/n, I just found my dad. So, excuse me if JJ’s living situation isn’t at the forefront of my mind.”
“I never said it had to be, but you’re acting like you don’t even care!”
“I do care! We all do!” John B shouts. “And maybe if you’d let up on him he’d actually come to you about this stuff!”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m saying, maybe JJ would give you the love you so desperately crave if you weren’t fucking suffocating him.”
“John B!” Kiara warns.
Sarah held her face in her hands, knowing John B had crossed the line. Maybe he had one too many beers in his system. Either way, hell was about to break loose. And when it came to JJ, hell hath no fury like you did.
Your head felt like it was about to explode. How could your friends seem to be so comfortable with this? The same friends that claimed to leave no pogue behind, to never turn their back on one of their own.
If that was true, then what was this? From the looks of it, nobody even pretended to give a damn.
“You’re fucking terrible, John B. This isn’t even about me at all! You just can’t stop deflecting from what a shitty friend you are. I mean, JJ would die for literally every last one of you guys. And he almost did! On multiple occasions! But instead you’re gonna neglect the one person who's seen you through all your bullshit and as soon as it’s over you’re gonna pretend like nothing happened? Like the Earth is back on its axis? The world doesn’t fucking revolve around you, John B. That’s just not- that’s not something you do to someone you love.”
There wasn’t a need to announce your departure, as it was so quiet inside that you could hear your own breathing.
As hard as it was to fight with John B like that, you couldn’t deny the weight that had been lifted off your chest. Your spirit was lighter. It was therapeutic, really. So therapeutic you felt peaceful enough to go home and take the longest nap ever recorded, maybe in John B’s own hammock just to prove a point.
Entranced in your own thoughts, you didn’t even register JJ resting in the hammock himself, hands intertwined behind his head. Not asleep, but wondering what your next words will be. The walls of the Chateau were thin enough, echoes of your voices amplified by the open windows.
He wasn’t sure if you simply didn’t notice his presence or if you were flat out ignoring him, walking past like he was invisible. Testing the waters, he called out from behind you.
“I never really thanked you for the smoothie.”
You froze in your tracks, face heating up and muscles tensing at the thought of the argument he probably just heard and decided not to barge in on.
“It’s alright. Wasn’t looking for praise.”
JJ met you halfway, taking note of your tired eyes and your feet dragging against the grass.
“So, what? You’re picking fights for me now?”
“You heard?”
“I think Ward Cameron heard. All the way from Guadalupe.”
“Stop it.” You warned, cracking a smile for a split second. JJ was good at that. Making you smile no matter the circumstances. “I stand up against injustice. That’s all.”
“Then are you still mad at me?”
“About what?”
“Yesterday. The whole… note on door situation.”
“Could never be mad at you, JJ. Especially not about that.”
He softly smiles, one that you return. It’s been a long time since you’d shared a small moment like this. Too long.
He gestures for you to come closer and slide into his arms as he’d held them out for you, just like you belong there.
“I am sorry, though.” JJ mumbles the words softly, almost into the crook of your neck as if he was speaking to you and you only. “I know you’re just trying to stick around for me.”
“Yeah. Just trying to be wherever you are.”
“You don’t have to fight for me, y’know.” I’m already here. Though you may not have caught on instantly, nothing he’s ever said has made as much sense.
“Sorry, J. Sometimes I just feel like we don’t deserve you. Like I don’t deserve you.” You admitted sheepishly.
JJ scoffs, and you’re not sure why. He’s often sarcastic, but it’s hard to tell what he’s really thinking in these situations.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Y/n?”
Your eyes meet his, hesitation behind them.
“You’re the one who doesn’t deserve me? Is that a joke?”
You looked at him as if it were obvious, like the line had already been drawn in the sand. This fact had already been decided; there was no going back, not now, and not ever.
“I know I’m not the smartest person, okay, but you’re making no sense.”
“Come again?” You asked, equally as confused as he was. It was incredulous for anyone to believe JJ of all people wasn’t worth it— as if he wasn’t worth someone who would go to the ends of the Earth for him, someone who would defend him six ways to Sunday. There was no one in your life more deserving of such a thing.
“Listen, Y/n...”
“No! You listen. Nobody should treat you like that. Especially our friends! As if their problems are bigger than yours or something. It’s just fucked up for any one of them to act like they don’t care because I know deep down, they do. They care just like I do but they just suck at showing it. Mostly John B. He sucks the most. And I’m not exempt either, I mean I should’ve checked on you sooner-”
“Shoulda, woulda, coulda.” JJ interrupted, placing his hands on your shoulders. “Y/n, it’s okay. I don’t need anything.”
“I know that. I just want to love you. Because I really do. I really love you, JJ. Like bad. So bad that it’s probably sad at this point but I really don’t care anymore! Not about what John B has to say, not about anything, because I’ll never regret it. I’ll never wish that I didn’t love you.”
That stupid weight again, feeling as if it’s taking off like a rocketship and leaving your conscience for good. It makes you want to scream the words from the rooftops. Over and over and over again.
Confessing feels good, but kissing JJ feels damn euphoric. His lips are on yours before you can even register what’s happening, too busy being self-aware to realize the way his eyes turned glossy, or the way he’s gently got one hand on your waist and one hand caressing your cheek.
“He’s got it all wrong. I love you, too.” JJ confesses after pulling away from you, briefly taking his eyes off yours to glance at the Chateau. His head shakes as he says it, that starry glint in his eyes so undeniably present. “So bad.”
He earns a giggle out of you as he mocked your words to him just a few moments ago. But now, things were changing. He couldn’t stand before you and pretend he didn’t feel the way he did. Not anymore, not ever again.
Not after you’d shown your love for him so confidently to everybody, time and time again. JJ Maybank wasn’t sure about many things in life, but you weren’t one of them. This was surely the best decision he’d made in years.
“Come over.” You whine between kisses, breaking him out of his trance. If you let him, he’d kiss you forever, and it still wouldn’t be enough.
JJ raises his eyebrows, smirking.
“For dinner. We’re having sloppy joes.”
JJ, unresisting temptation, leans in again and moans against your lips dramatically. “What about dessert?”
You give his hair a tug and kiss the smirk off his face, whispering to him a secret.
“And maybe dessert.”
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taglist: @ilovejjmaybank @missevi @nxsmss @cameronsrafe @msgorillagripcoochie @bibliophilewednesday @tovvaa @rudybarnes @annab-nana @reawritesthings @moniamaybank @outerbankspreferences @laneylaneylaney @jjpouggues @pogueslandia @mildkleptomaniac @whcclxr @mrs-cameron @it-was-never-meant-to-be-boys @alanniys @amourology @luversgirl + jj maybank taglist: @destourtereaux
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𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ The Advice Column Issue No.1 ; How to deal with fake friends while balancing school life 🎀🧁
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Hii Dolls!!!⭐️ This is officially the first issue of my Brand new segment The Advice Column!!!! and i chose the topic fake friends bc as someone who’s had an alarming amount of fake friends in the past i can definitely give endless advice in this topic and its a collab with the @honeytonedhottie !! bc i thought she could also give so really good advice!!🎀⭐️
Are you struggling with keeping up in your studies? worried if your friends are talking behind ur back? Stressed? Feeling like school and socials are just to much??? DONT WORRY!! Dolly n Honey are gonna save the day!! 🎀⭐️
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Section 1 ; Honey!!🍯
how to balance ur school and social life (in bullet points) !! 🎀🧁
- make a list of priorities and stick to it like its a handbook
- practice saying no to events and saying no to excessive studying, the key is to find an equilibrium
- combine social and academic events
- make sure to use ur time wisely and do whats important first, so that then u can have loads of time for ur social life!
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Section 2 ; Dolly! 🎀
No.1 ; Stand up for yourself!! ⭐️
if ur so called “friend” is constantly make smart remarks about you,scrutinizing you for the smallest thing,being passive aggressive or really just trying to hurt your feelings always stand up for yourself and never let insult like that because that shows that you have no self respect and then they’re gonna just keep doing it set clear boundaries and don’t be a doormat never let this person/people walk all over you , if you didn’t appreciate something they said don’t take shit from them address and make sure it never happens again
No.2 ; spotting a secretly fake friend⭐️!
now there’s obviously “friends” that you can spot from a mile away that they’re definitely toxic but theres also a certain type of friend that could be the sweetest to ur face but secretly talk shit behind ur back and its honestly not that hard to spot one of these “friends” so here are some characteristics of ‘the secretly fake friend’
- never sticks up for you
- constantly lying
- at time can be very passive aggressive
- will tell you that someone was talking about you and not defend you at all
- will make you feel like a bad friend even if they’re wrong in the situation
- if you’ve ever confronted them on their behavior and they say they’re sorry but then repeats the same actions
- lets their other friends talk shit about you
- HUGE VICTIM COMPLEX!
these kinds of fake friends are tricky bc you really can’t spot them at first and then it can be harder to cut them off which brings me to my next point
No.3 CUT THEM OFF !!⭐️
listen i know its hard to let go of these people at first im mean I’ve had to do it multiple times but i swear it gets sooo much easier to not have these people in ur life its way better to have no friends than a bunch of friends thats secretly hate you don’t stay caught up on toxic people like this its a waste of ur own peace and well being , block them,stop following them,stop talking to them have NOTHING to do with these people/person
No.5 ; Ur not special !!
now this title is a bit alarming but what i mean by that is if you have a friend that’s constantly talks down about people for no reason whether it be their friends or someone they know and im not talking about the standard gossip talk bc tbh everyone gossips but im talking about like drags them through the mud calls them mean names and purposefully spreads rumors about other people they’ll do it to do you as well ur not special i doesn’t matter what this person is telling you they’ll talk about any and everyone it doesn’t matter people like this do not care
No.4 ; Being Un-phased !! ⭐️
now after you cut them off either gonna
A. make it seem like they’re innocent and have been nothing but nice to you and try and make you feel bad
B. Act like theirs beef when in reality theres not they just want a reason to start a problem
C. to the standard mean girl remarks side eyes,whispers,random pointing and slightly laughing, or even in some cases talk loudly about you but indirectly
now in any of these situations never let it bother you show no reaction these kinds of people feed off ur fear of them shows no reaction when it comes to things like this and you can also do it back side eye them back,give them weird looks back now im definitely not saying be just like them but play their game don’t let disrespect like this slide and i know how hard it can be especially since these are people ir support be close with but i promise making friends that actually care about you is WORLDS BETTER!!! you’ll have such a peace of mind and being able to make friend that actually care about you is such a freeing feeling!!!!
Reminders!!! 🎀🍯
- they’re opinions don’t matter
- these people are no above you in any way shape or form
- stress is normal don’t let it get to you !!
- you deserve much better friends
- it normal to feel sad after cutting them off
- this person/these people don’t deserve you!!!
- you got thiss!!!
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just-aake · 8 months
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Boundless Devotion - Part II
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Pairing: princess!Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader
Summary: MedievalAU. Natasha is the eldest princess of the Romanov Kingdom. As the time of her coronation approaches, she is suddenly forced to make a decision – either find herself a partner or her parents will choose one for her.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15
Warnings: slight angst, violence, abuse
Words: 2582
The carriage leaves the castle gates, carrying the two noblewomen inside.
“I don’t understand why I can’t be outside with the other knights,” Kate pouts as she looks out the window at the guards riding their horses beside the carriage.
Her dog mirrors her position, resting its head sadly against the opening of the window.
Flipping to the next page of the book Queen Melina gave you earlier today after your meeting with her, you respond without looking up at her.
“Because, Kate, even though you chose to become a knight, at the moment, you are still the daughter of a noble family."
You finally glance up at her with a pointed look as you continue your explanation.
"That means you still need to have some form of protection until then.”
Kate groans in disappointment as she slumps back on the seat across from you, crossing her arms as she sulks. 
After numerous pleas and persistent requests to her mother about her desire to join the Royal Guard, she finally gained permission to begin her training, though under a lot of conditions and restrictions. 
Quickly bored with her sulking, Kate glances at the book in your lap curiously before asking.
“Chronicles of the Red Room? Why are you reading about that?”
With a nonchalant shrug, you reply casually, “I just wanted to learn more about my family’s involvement in the war.”
The book in question recounts personal stories from the previous war between the Romanov Kingdom and the Stark Kingdom.
More precisely, it focuses on a place known as the Red Room, which was apparently under the control of your family's house during the war.
According to your findings so far, this place was mainly used for interrogating captured enemies, and it appears that during the war, the Dreykov House gained considerable recognition for its effectiveness in infiltrating enemy ranks and securing strategic advantages for the kingdom through the Red Room.
The queen graciously provided you with some books on the subject when you inquired about it.
Kate hums in casual interest before commenting curiously.
“Wasn’t your old governess also a general during the war? What was her name again…?”
Kate snaps her fingers when she remembers. 
“Madam B!” 
Your hand pauses mid-flip at the name, but Kate doesn’t notice your sudden discomfort as she continues.
"She's always been by your side since you were young, but I haven't seen her around for a while now. Where did she disappear to anyway?"
You compose yourself quickly when Kate looks at you, giving her a faint smile before replying, “I believe she moved to the countryside.”
Kate nods in acknowledgment, accepting your words.
As you're about to return your focus to the book, Kate's next words cause you to tense once again.
“It's odd that she decided to leave you now. You'd think she'd want to stay close, considering what happened."
Kate looks at you cautiously, knowing how sensitive the subject of the incident is for you. 
You sigh internally at her words.
Despite her cheerful and carefree demeanor, you sometimes forget how observant Kate can be about certain matters.
“Madam B has been a part of my family's employment for many years. It was just simply time for her to get what she deserved,” you explain vaguely.
Noticing Kate nervously biting her lips—a telltale sign of her uncertainty—you anticipate there's something else she wants to say.
Eventually, she gives in with a sad expression.
“That wasn’t the only thing that changed.”
Letting out a deep sigh, you're already aware of what she's referring to.
“I already told you, Kate,” you reassure her gently. “Just because we don’t spend all of our time together anymore doesn’t mean Natasha and I are not still friends.”
Shrugging your shoulders, you return your attention to your book, commenting, "We just…each have our own responsibilities now.”
Kate sighs sadly, slumping back into her seat, “I know, but it just doesn't feel the same. We miss having you with us like before, especially Natasha.”
Choosing not to reply, you pretend to concentrate on your book, ignoring the tightness in your chest at her words.
The truth is — you miss Natasha too.
~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~
The carriage stops at the entrance of your family’s manor.
Your gatekeeper, Pietro Maximoff, waves at you as you enter. When he opens the carriage door for you, you see your lady-in-waiting, Wanda Maximoff, rushing down the front steps. 
“Welcome back, Lady Y/n.” 
The twins stand side by side when they greet you.
You give them a warm smile and nod at them graciously.
As orphans from the remnants of the war, Wanda and Pietro were brought into your family’s house by some of the staff members.
Due to their young age when they joined your household, the three of you practically grew up together.
As a result, you genuinely see them more like siblings than anything else, and they reciprocate the same sentiment.
However, in the presence of those outside the manor, they still try to maintain a respectful attitude toward you.
“Thank you,” you say before gesturing to the back of the carriage. “Pietro, can you help bring in the box?”
He nods at your request, moving to reach for the item.
When you’re about to go up the stairs, Wanda places a gentle hand on your arm, stopping your movement.
Her face holds a tense smile as she speaks.
“Your father has come home early from his meeting,” she states in a casual tone. Though, her eyes dart behind you with a meaningful glance.
The news causes you to freeze, your eyes slightly widening. Swiftly, you turn around and intercept Kate's path, stopping her in her tracks.
She tilts her head at you curiously in confusion. 
You offer her a reassuring smile, dispelling all the tense emotions that had crossed your face just moments ago.
“I think I’m just going to rest early today, Kate. It's probably best if you head home," you suggest.
Kate begins to examine you carefully, her expression turning worried.
“Are you okay? Do you feel sick?”
You shake your head, turning her around and lightly directing her back to the carriage before responding.
“I’m fine, just a little tired from reading during the ride.”
Kate casts a skeptical glance your way as she ushers Lucky back into the carriage.
“Okay…,” she says, her voice trailing off. She bites her lip again with uncertainty, remembering something. Then with a deep breath, she speaks again.
“Yelena and I plan to have a picnic at the usual spot by the lake tomorrow,” Kate hesitates briefly before continuing. “Natasha will be there too. I could come in the morning, and we can go together if you’d like?” she proposes with a hopeful tone.
You give her an apologetic look and shake your head, denying her offer.
“I can't, Kate. I have a meeting with Lady Maria tomorrow.” 
Kate acknowledges your response with a disappointed nod, retreating back into the carriage with a sad goodbye.
You wave as the carriage disappears through the gates. Once you're certain she's out of sight, you hurry up the front stairs and make your way into your family’s manor. 
Wanda and Pietro fall in step beside you. Together, the three of you move swiftly along the hallways, taking a less direct route to your room within the manor.
“Where is he now?” you ask, turning slightly to Wanda.
“He was in his study before you arrived,” she replies.
You glance at the box in Pietro’s hand, which contains other books that the queen gave you today. These books concern subjects that you don't want your father to know you are researching.
“Can you keep that in your quarters for now?” 
“Of course,” Pietro replies, nodding without hesitation.
You turn the corner toward the staircase that leads to your floor. 
“What do you think you are doing?”
The booming voice from above causes you to freeze, and you look up to see your father, Lord Dreykov, standing at the top of the staircase. His gaze is fixed on the three of you, examining you critically before shifting his eyes to the person behind you.
He points at Pietro, ordering, “You, take that box to my study.”
Pietro doesn’t move at the command. Instead, he turns his attention to look at you for direction. 
Dreykov watches the interaction with narrow eyes, and a flicker of irritation crosses his face. He descends the steps slowly, clasping his hands behind his back. 
You hold your breath nervously when he stops in front of you, your eyes watching him cautiously.
The sound of a sharp, echoing slap rings out in the room, and your head snaps to the side from the impact of the hit.
As you instinctively bring your hand to your cheek in shock, you cry out in pain when he harshly grabs your wrist and pushes you forcefully to your knees. 
You hear some movement from behind you. Glancing back, Wanda and Pietro both have shocked and concerned looks as they step towards you.
“Don’t move,” Dreykov commands threateningly.
Your father twists your wrist in a painful direction, causing you to cry out in pain again.
In response, Wanda and Pietro come to an abrupt stop, freezing in their tracks.
Dreykov chuckles darkly at them.
“So, the two of you can follow orders after all.” 
He observes your two obviously loyal attendants, seeing a mix of restrained anger and concern etched across their faces. Annoyance tinges his expression as he clicks his tongue in irritation.
“It seems that in my absence from the manor, some of the staff have forgotten who’s the one in control here.”
He turns to Pietro threateningly, his hand still holding your wrist in a deathly grip.
“Am I going to have to repeat myself?”
Pietro clenches his teeth in anger, his gaze shifting between you and your father’s vice-like grip on your wrist. With a reluctant bow, he hurries away toward the study with the box in tow. 
When Pietro disappears around the corner, your father finally lets go of your wrist.
You swiftly pull your hand back, cradling it protectively against your chest. 
Immediately, you sense Wanda’s presence behind you. Her hands grasp your arms, pulling you up and drawing you closer to her, creating a safe distance from your father. 
Dreykov sneers at you, turning to leave.
“Don’t ever disrespect me like that again, daughter,” he warns, his tone threatening.
~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~
“The nerve of that man!” Wanda fumes as she holds your injured wrist in her lap.
You could see the purplish discoloration on your skin, indicating that a bruise was already forming.
“He’s absent for most of your life. Now, suddenly, he decides to stay and terrorize you and everyone else in the manor!”
Though her words are angry, Wanda is gentle as she applies the medical salves on your wrist. 
She's also not wrong about your father. Throughout your childhood, he was rarely at home, always away on trips and meetings to other kingdoms.
Honestly, any memories of moments when he was actually at the manor are hazy to you. 
For some reason, he has chosen to stay in the kingdom for a full year now. His return happened shortly after the incident that unfolded on Natasha's birthday.
However, it's hard to believe that his presence is solely driven by concern for you.
Wanda continues, “Not to mention those creepy guards of his that hide in the shadows.”
You wince when she begins to wrap the bandages around a tender area.
“Which is why you should lower your voice, Wanda,” you warn her.
A familiar knocking pattern sounds at the door before Wanda can respond. 
Knowing who it is, she calls out, “Come in!”
Pietro slips inside quickly, his gaze immediately focused on your wrist in concern.
“How is she?”
You respond before Wanda can continue her rant.
“I’m fine. Both of you calm down.”
Wanda huffs at you, crossing her arms, before noticing Pietro’s slightly disheveled hair and asking, “What took you so long anyway?” 
Pietro's expression shifts into his usual mischievous grin as he pulls out the bundle of books from behind his back.
You recognize them as the ones the queen had given to you from the box.
“I ran to the library and switched these out with some of your geography books,” he explains proudly. 
“Pietro!” you chastise before reprimanding him with a sigh. “Thank you, but please don’t do something that risky again. Who knows what my father would do if he caught you.”
Noticing Wanda and Pietro communicating silently to each other with their eyes, you ask them knowingly.
“What is it?”
Wanda's gaze turns sad and uncertain as she speaks, “We can’t really help you much given our position, but maybe if you tell Princess Natasha…” 
Wanda gives you a knowing look before confidently stating, "She wouldn’t let this happen to you."
Sighing tiredly at the repeated reminder of the princess’ absence from your life, you adjust your sleeve to conceal the bandages as you explain.
“Her coronation is in a couple of months. I’m not going to burden Natasha with problems of a single noble family when she’s going to have to worry about an entire kingdom soon.”
The twins give you sympathetic looks, already aware of the real reasons for your reluctance to involve the princess.
With a sigh, you remind yourself of the decision that you made after that incident last year.
It was the best option.
The further you stay away from Natasha, the safer she will be.
~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~
The following afternoon, accompanied by Wanda, you go to meet Lady Maria Hill at her manor.
The purpose of the meeting was to see the compatibility between the two of you.
In other words, it was sort of like a first date.
The Hill family is renowned for their significant contributions to the kingdom's military. A majority of their family members hold distinctions as decorated soldiers or knights in the kingdom.
In fact, her cousin is the Captain of the Royal Guard at the castle. 
Even now, Maria wears her commander uniform while she sits across from you. Her posture remains perfect and attentive as she places her cup down on the table before addressing you.
“To be honest, Lady Y/n, I was surprised that you still wanted to meet with me today, given the recent news.”
Confused, you glance at Wanda in question, wondering if she knew what Maria was referring to. She shakes her head and shrugs her shoulders in response.
With a polite smile, you return your attention to Maria.
“I’m afraid we haven’t heard any news,” you tell her. 
“Well, it’s more like a rumor, just something Steve heard amongst the castle workers,” Maria comments casually before leaning forward slightly as if whispering a secret.
“Apparently, Princess Natasha disclosed last night that she’s in a secret relationship.”
You ignore the new uncomfortable feeling in your chest at the fact that there was something concerning Natasha that you weren’t aware of.
You manage to conceal the surprise and discomfort on your face as your hands cradle the cup in front of you, its warmth offering you little comfort.
“Oh? And did she mention who it is?” you ask, curious to learn more.
“That’s what makes this meeting so strange,” Maria pauses before nodding at you.
“She said that she was in a relationship with you, Lady Y/n.”
~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15
Series Masterlist : Boundless Devotion
a/n: Thank you for reading! Hopefully the tags work, just let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for this series.
Taglist: @lightwhoranoutoflight, @taliiiaasteria
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pigeonpeach · 3 months
Text
Love potion yandere <3
Cw: dub con, suggestive themes, drugging, yandere themes,
Prompt: You recently received a potion from a strange old lady you helped out. You helped her pick out a cute bunny plushie for her daughter and even helped pay for it. As reward she gave you that potion and payed you back. Telling you it will show wether or not someone loves you. If they don’t, then they will act as if nothing happened. But if they do then it will strengthen their love to the point they cannot resist showing affection to you. You were in fact: quite perplexed who to use this on. So you saved it for later.
Well later came.
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Jean
You were preparing tea for your boss Jean when you got curious. She’d bene eyeing you for some time now so you wanted some answers. The potion came up again as you contemplated it. There was no way you could but… ohh… could anyone blame you. Yearning for someone is truly frightening. You yearn for her touch, to sit on her lap, to be her wife.. oh you just want to know.. maybe just a drop. Just a little? Half a drop maybe?
You caved. Who could blame you. You were horrible with signs and you needed to know. You didn’t put much. A single drop. Nothing more. You watched her lift it before the guilt overtook you.
“Wait! I just realized I didn’t use the right tea bags! I’m so sorry.” You said. She put the cup down looking at you concerned.
“Its no problem. I can drink this one. I’m not that picky.” She chuckled. You however still sweated.
“B-but I really insist I must get it right before you have it!”
“Is it poisonous?” She asked confused and skeptical.
“Of course not. I just.. this cup was… i- i um… its a really experimental tea I bought and I don’t know if you would like it.” You said nervously. You looked like a vein would burst at any second from your stress.
“Please relax, you look way too stressed over this. I’ll have a sip and tell you my thoughts.” She took a sip before you could interject. She put the cup down as she swallowed it. A smile graced her lips. “This is great actually. It has such a lovely taste.”
You felt relieved.
“Do tell me the flavor, this is excellent stuff I’d like to buy some myself.” She said.
“O-oh I’ll go check!” You said nervously.
With that you left as you clutched your heart. It seemed she was fine. Did… that mean it didn’t work? Or did she not love you? Oh well. What matters is that she’s fine and you got your closure without risking your job. You decided to try and come up with some exotic and outrageous flavor to tell her as you killed time in the library.
Meanwhile for Jean she felt herself growing restless. Her hands tingling as she slammed her fist on the table. “Where is she! Where is she!” She felt so fustrated. Her heart raced. Her mind blanked as it was filled with thoughts of you. She needed you this instant. She sat up from her desk as she vowed to find you herself.
Coming into the Library she found you dusting the shelves.
“O-oh Jean I’m sorry I got carried a-woat?!” You gasped as she suddenly lifted you into her arms and carried you off. “M-m-m”
“Don’t speak. I just… want to hold you right now.” She said, her voice as so stern, it was nothing like the woman you were talking to a hour ago. Her face on your neck taking a deep sniff making you surprised. “You’re so soft.. were you always this compliant? You didn’t even resist when I picked you up, you just went along with it.” She chuckled, her laugh holding a slight sinister feeling to it.
“G-grand master?” You squeaked. She seemed elated.
“Just call me Jean.” She said carrying you off to her office. You couldn’t help but wonder if even one drop was too much. But at least you got your answers… for her sake you hope its not permanent
Diluc
Maybe you were in over your head. You made muffins for the household and offered him one, you made sure it was his favorite, blueberry cinnamon. He thanked you and ate the whole thing. He even ate most of the muffins. They were gone before midday. But you knew it wouldn’t harm anyone who ate it. You had been hassled by Adelinde for the recipe when Milly came rushing to you.
“Ma-master Diluc requests your presence immediately.” Milly said urgently. You were a bit puzzled by her reaction. But you obliged heading to his office. You barely got the door open before you were suddenly pulled into a tight embrace.
“You… what did you do to me?” He growled. You tried to squirm as you panicked slightly.
“H-huh? W-whats going on? I- oh!” You were suddenly lifted as you pinned you to the wall.
“Those muffins… you.. you were already so tempting and now I can’t get you out of my mind. So what was it? A aphrodisiac?”
“I-it shouldnt be having those effects. I only did one drop… i just… wanted to see if you felt the same way.” You fessed up quickly. You were very conflicted, on one hand this was very scary, but also kind of hot. Being pinned against the wall, your crush pinning you and desperately pressing himself into you. Oh it was a battle between your sense and your heart.
“I knew it. You could’ve just asked you know? You have no excuse now.” His voice was so growly. Your body tingled as he spoke directly into your ear. “You’re going to take responsibility here. You are going to mine. I’ll make sure of that.”
Dehya
You had the biggest crush on Dehya. You hired her for a expedition you went on with your students but you ended up head over heel in love with her. Now that it was over you tried to find any excuse to spend time with or hang out with her. You wondered if sometimes she got annoyed or hated you because you worked for the Akademiya. But with that potion however you figured you would have a clear shot of figuring it out. Of course she wasnt a test dummy. You tested it on a lab rat who became quite cuddly with you. The rat survived with no damage done mentally or physically. So while you two were staying at inn together you slipped a drop in her cup.
“DEHYA!” You gasped as she just lifted you into the air, as if she were offering you to the sky, the. Lowering you to her chest. Then repeating that. You realized she was using you as s weight.
“Heh, you’re so light! It barely feels like I’m moving a muscle.” She smiles as you froze, not wanting to fall.
“Dehya please put me down this is so embarrassing!” You were quite worried about falling. You already had such a fragile back, you couldn’t worsen it even more.
“Why? You’re so cute like this. Heh, my little researcher is just so light.. makes me wonder how the wind never blew you away.” She teased. You weren’t even that skinny. She was just that strong. “I could keep you, just sling you over my shoulder and take you with me. Carry you around like a purse… a pretty purse. One I could fu-“
“DEHYA! Please put me down! Also are you drunk?” You were quite puzzled. None of your experiments yielded this. The mouse had simply become cuddly, your cat also became clingy for the day. Perhaps it was just the type of love. The mouse and your cat loved you as a caretaker so their love strengthened to make them more dependent on you than they were, her love must’ve been more than you thought.
“Heh.. I slipped out my flask for some firewater mixture I got. Wanted to see if you would have a sip or two.” That was concerning. You didn’t know she could be so devious. It was kind of exciting though… you had always wanted to try firewater.. getting drunk with her seemed like a great way to bond an- “stop thinking so much.” Dehya seemed angry as she swung you around once more.
“Please put me down! Dehya you’ll break something and that will be me!”
“Relax, I wouldn’t break something pretty like you.” She said, slinging you over her shoulder and tossing you onto the bed. You two had separate beds but you figured you wouldn’t be sleeping alone tonight. “So pretty, so pliable and soft. My little researcher..” she purred. You were struggling to maintain your composure or mentally write notes. Her body ontop of you. “Mine.. all~~~ mine. I won’t let anyone else take you. If they try I’ll cut their fucking hand off.”
“Dehya that’s a crime!” You were alarmed. You couldn’t let her do such things. “Let’s just get some rest. You clearly need it!” You attempted to roll away but she blocked you.
“Mm i’d get away with it.. there’s plenty of spaces to hide a body in sumeru.” She purred as if that wasn’t the most sinister words you’ve heard from her.
“Dehya! No! No murder no using me like a purse, and no-“
“Are you trying to leave me.” She growled.
“Dehya i can’t even get up right now.” You sighed.
“Good. I’m going to use you… like a pillow. We can do more fun stuff when I’m sober. Besides… I wanna do it under the stars. And also so anyone nearby can hear you calling my name~” she giggled. You weren’t actually too Against that. That actually sounded kind of hot to you.
“Please just lay down so you can sleep!” An Idea popped into your mind. “I’ll give you a kiss if you get ready for bed and promise not murder anyone!”
“Just one? Nonono I want more than just kisses her.”she said smugly. “What’s stopping me from taking some right now? You clearly don’t mind.” You sighed.
“I’ll… go on that starry night date of yours if you just comply here.”
“You mean the one where I’ll f*ck you?”
“Yes.”
“Deal.”
Neuvillette
Truth be told the potion wasn’t for him. You had a crush on someone else and when they asked for some water you dropped that in there.
You didn’t know it was for the Iudex of Fonatine. Not until you were dragged into his office and he curled himself around you in his more.. dragon like form. His tail was massive spanning what must be several feet, you couldn’t measure it though considering the way he curled himself, tail included, around you.
“Mine… mine..” he growled as you stood still and shaking. You liked the Iudex sure but you knew he was way out of your league. Apparently he wasn’t.
“S-sir… i- i have work…” you weren’t sure how to get out of this. His grip was tight. His bigger body wrapped around you as he sniffed you. You couldn’t get a inch away.
“Mine.” His growl was more deeper.
“Sir! I-i can’t.. ngh..” you gasped as he held you so tight you had difficulty breathing.
“Say it.” His voice was more stern than you had ever heard. The kind of tone he’d have when dealing with a unruly court.
“S-say what?” Your voice trembled. You wondered if he could kill you with this grip.
“Say that you’re mine.” His voice reverberated throughout your body, making your hairs stand on end. His grip only getting tighter as you became more alarmed.
“I-I’m yours… I’m yours!” You pleaded. To your relief he lessened his grip letting you breathe. However he started instead to.. bite you. You jolted feeling his bite at your neck, it was more like a nibble but it was still a alarming sensation. “S-sir! We’re in your office..” you wished you never used that potion at all. Maybe instead thrown it away. You might not get out of this in one piece.
“I don’t care.. I want you…” His tongue lapped at your sweat as if he was… bathing you? Do dragons clean themselves like cats? Maybe not but it was a jarring sensation. “You’re mine.. I’m not going to let anyone else have you.” He growled as his hands on your uniform pulled it open.
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Hii!! Can I request something based of a scene from season 3 of obx? So basically JJ and reader have been dating for a while and reader finally tells him that she loves him and he replies with ‘thanks’ because he doesn’t know how to act with being loved and reader feels hurt and leaves him alone. They ignore each other for a couple days but both feel bad and it ends with JJ telling reader that he loves her too ?? Hope this make sense 🥹
Request: Hii! Could I request a jj x fem reader with prompts 6 "don't push me away" and 8 "you can't love me". Basically a lot of angst that leads to fluff with jj not feeling like he deserves you.
I think these requests got sent when season 3 came out...I'm so sorry anons
my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time
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Late night cuddles were part of your and JJ’s night routine. It didn’t matter if you were outside in the hammock, the pull-out or in Big John’s old bedroom, he needed those cuddles to fall asleep. 
 Fingers entwined in his tousled hair, you playfully twirled a few strands around your fingers as his head rested on your chest. ‘’How do you fall asleep when I’m not here?’’ you mused softly, curiosity tinging your voice.
JJ's eyelids gently fluttered closed, his face painted with contentment as your touch traced soothing patterns. ‘’I smoke,’’ he explained, a sigh of relaxation accompanying his words as if the mere thought of your touch had already begun to lull him into a serene state. ‘’It takes me out like a light.’’ 
It wasn’t true. Nights at the chateau were fine. Your scent lingered in the sheets and on the pillow — and on the shirt you always used to sleep in. On nights where JJ had to go home — home with his father —, these nights were not so great. JJ would lay in his bed and, depending if his father had too much to drink or not, he would get a few hours of sleep or wipe the blood from wherever his fist had landed.
A comfortable silence fell in the room, joined by the occasional singing of crickets outside the window. You found them annoying at first, but you were used to it by now. It was part of the ‘sleeping over at the chateau’ experience. 
Along with the blinding morning sun. 
‘’We should go to the beach tomorrow, catch some waves.’’
JJ hummed. ‘’My board is still at my dad’s though…’’ 
‘’We could pick it up after he goes to work? He works on Wednesdays, right?’’ 
‘’Yeah,’’ he replied, snuggling deeper into your chest as sleep began to claim him. ‘’Let’s do that.’’ 
‘’JJ?’’ He hummed again. ‘’I love you.’’
You felt him stiffen on your chest as the three words left your lips, and for a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath.
‘’Eh...thanks.’’
When JJ fell into a deep sleep, you gently slipped from under him and searched for your pants and shoes. You felt bad for leaving in the middle of the night, but you couldn't wake by his side after he hurt your feelings so deeply. You weren't mad at him for not saying ‘I love you’ back. You understood if he wasn’t ready to say it back, everyone had their own pace, but his response had left a bittersweet taste in your mouth.
It was no news for anyone that JJ was an idiot and he had the tendency of blurting out something dumb when his brain goes into panic, which was probably what happened when you said the three big words. That’s why he always plays clown when things get emotional. 
Guilt filled his guts when he woke up alone in the morning. 
Truth was, JJ didn’t know how to act with being loved. No one ever told him they loved him before. No one ever made him feel like he was worthy of being loved. So he didn’t know how to react to someone telling him they love him…even when the person was the most important in his life. 
A few days later, you were walking down a street when you saw John B. and JJ coming out of the gas station. His blond hair was pushed back under a snapback, just the way you loved. He laughed at something John B. said, then his eyes crossed yours across the street. JJ completely froze. 
Your feet walked before you made the decision and you crossed the street. John B. saw you coming and eclipsed himself, going inside the store to pay for the gas, leaving you and JJ to talk. The latter tried to offer to go instead, but John B. didn’t let him. 
‘’What’s up?’’ 
‘’Really, JJ? We haven’t spoken to each other in five days, that’s all you have to say?’’ 
He looked toward the store and shrugged. 
‘’We have to talk about the other night,’’ you said, bringing up exactly what he didn’t want to talk about.
The words hung in the air for a few seconds until JJ said something. 
‘’I have no idea what you’re talking about. Like you said, it’s been five days since we saw each other.’’ 
You should have known he would play fool, but it won’t get him out of this conversation.
‘’JJ,’’ you said sternly. ‘’I know you hate talking about feelings, but we have—’’ 
‘’You can’t love me,’’ he interrupted, his voice laced with self-doubt, and his eyes filled with disbelief. ‘’I’m just some loser. I don’t deserve you or your love.’’ 
His words hurt like a knife to your heart. 
‘’Don’t say that.’’ You shook your head, reaching for him, but he stepped back. ‘’You’re not a loser, JJ. Whoever said that clearly doesn’t know you. I know you, the real you, and I love you.’’ 
‘’I don’t want you to love me.’’ 
It was at this moment John B. chose to return, forcing your and JJ’s conversation to end. You wanted to glare at the brunet, but your back was to him. Couldn’t he have stayed longer inside the store? 
‘’John B. is back. I’m gonna go.’’ JJ nodded at the twinkie, impatient to get in and drive off. 
You grabbed his arm with pleading eyes. ‘’Don't push me away.’’
‘’We really gotta go.’’ 
‘’JJ!’’
After that encounter, you decided to not go to the chateau for a while. It was more his home than yours, so you didn’t want to be in his space. If he didn’t want to talk to you, fine. No, it wasn’t fine, but what else was there to do? 
Sarah and Kiara were sad to not have you around for cookouts and boat days. They invited you for Pope’s birthday ‘party’, but you saw JJ smiling and having fun in John B.’s backyard and went back home.  
It wasn’t until the annual end of summer bonfire that you saw him again. He was talking with Kiara and Pope, probably telling them some dumb story by the way Kiara was shaking her head in disbelief. Now that you weren’t there, she was the one who had to deal with him. 
A little later into the night, you went to get a refill and bumped into JJ at the kegger. He kindly offered to fill your cup, then asked to talk to you. You followed him down the beach where the waves were crashing on the rocks, the music and voices from the party-ers fading into white noise. 
‘’I want to say I’m sorry. For pushing you away and for being a jerk to you.’’ He kicked his foot in the sand, a fidgeting habit when he’s nervous. ‘’No one ever told me they loved me before and I just— I flipped. You know how I be.’’
You hummed. No one knows him like you do. 
‘’I wasn’t mad because you didn’t say it back.’’
‘’No?’’ JJ raised his eyes to you. 
You shook your head. ‘’I could never be mad at you for that.’’ 
‘’Then why did you leave?’’  
‘’No one says ‘thanks’ after you tell them you love them!’’ 
‘’What was I supposed to say?’’
Truthfully, you didn’t know. 
A more serious expression settled on JJ’s face as he reached for your hand. ‘’I can see how that didn't land right. I’m sorry,’’ he said again. ‘’I'm a fucking idiot for not saying it back.’’
OBX taglist: @moralina @eudximoniakr @toylewestinnyc @rottenstyx  @sweeterheartxamerica  @jordierama @viridwityy @izzy-laufeyson @kenzi-woycehoski @lilaconner @Katsukis1Wife  @hawkegfs @mommyruuetrue  @acornacreacure @snownjune @nmedina8611 @slvtherinseeker  @slvtherinseeker @poppet05 @1stevelacyfan @illf4iry @withbeautyandrage  @maybankslover @sunflowerziva @laylasbunbunny @Honey-marvel15 @leoluvsur-pappy @slytherhoes @kcskye123 @outerbanksacc  @pedrosprincess  @mikaelsonsstuff  @skyesthebomb  @a1mzcruml3y @iluurmom  @popeheywardssecretgf  @madelynie  @loverofdrewstarkey  @radiant-whore  @outsider-at-hogwarts @luci1fer @bbycowboi @rafecameronsbadussy @urbfsbitchlol @nomorespahgetti @bloodyhw @Veescorneroftheworld  @papayaboyluvr @slytherinambitious @darylscvmdumpster @tommysaxes @johannelis2302nely @lynbubble  @straberryshortcake143 @beth-gallagher22 @doestalker @rubyliquor @theflcwer @angelxxrose @sierraluvzz @cruzgrecia @evelestrange @sunnysunny133696  @under-seasoned-pasta @hoeforsirius
All and more taglist:  @kenqki  @hawkegfs  @gillybear17   @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @laylasbunbunny @gemofthenight @beautyb1ade   @mellabella101 @vxnity713  @bisexualgirlsblog @queenofslytherin889 @thatbxtchesblog @softb-tterfly @ethanlandrycanbreakmyheart  @xyzstar  @graceberman3   @mikeyspinkcup @jackierose902109 @daisydark @laurasdrey @mischieftom @fanatic4niall @peterholland04 @idkwhattonamethisblogs  @lexasaurs634  @notasadgirlipromise @zoeynicolas @thejuleshypothesis @multi-fandom-bi-bitch @lexasaurs634  @notasadgirlipromise @thejuleshypothesis  @katherinejess  @rafesgirlstuff  @lafleshlumpeater @iamluminosity
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desb3ar · 17 days
Text
You’re Not Helping
Summary: Being funny at the wrong time.
Pairing: Miguel O’Hara and Co. x Spidervariant!Reader
A/N: PLATONIC READER!! You’re pretty much the life of the party <3. This is gonna be stupidly goofy because im in that mood LMFAO. This is veeeeeery low effort because it was a simple idea
——————
There had always been a dangerous flaw that seems to be unchecked. A problematic talent that will always leave your fellow colleagues in harms way with the commotion you’d cause with the insufferable antics you presented on the table. The thing that always happens during any mission, especially when things are quiet and dull. It was your way of keeping the energy and spirits high. What am I trying to say?
You are funny as FUCK.
You always had your way of making quips, like any other spider-being could, but something about your comedy always left people with hurting abs from the constant barrage of funny jokes you’d gunned them down with. It was a relentless attack, friendly fire if you will, because it always ended up with someone laughing too loud and compromising their position. As self-sabotaging as that may be, you wouldn’t do what you did if you couldn’t handle what came next.
Often times, you’ve received heavy critiques from the society’s leader, Miguel O’Hara, for putting people in danger because of your lack of professionalism. Jessica Drew would back him up, sometimes. However, she had never been happier when you joined, your jokes being a highlight of her day. You remembered when Jess and you were supposed to be doing a stakeout, scoping out for an anomaly. You had the villain’s file on hand and started to make the most ab shredding roasts that had Jess shed a tear.
“Lookin’ like a whole bottle of what the fuck.” You’d say.
Jess cuts you a lot of slack because of your high skill in the spider-arts. She takes great pleasure in being paired with you on missions because she always knew it was gonna be a successful and absolutely hilarious one.
You loved working with Jess too, because you yourself are a fan of her sense of humor. You hoped you’d be able to work with her more and more because of the amazing chemistry you two had.
Another person you love to hang out with was Peter B. You and him had busted each other’s guts before when you ate lunch together. Spoke about silly stories that had your food run cold from how engaged you two were. Which was absolutely crazy since Peter chows down given the chance.
Today is different. You were on a mission with Miguel. Before you both went to the dimension where the anomaly was located, he made it abundantly clear he didn’t want the jokes and quips today.
“This is a serious matter and I don’t want you to twist it around to be some joke.” He lectured.
You gave him a thumbs up and complied. However, like the snake you are, fingers had been crossed.
The two of you were in the middle of searching for the anomaly, staking out to be sure that nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Miguel had told Lyla to scan the area, in which she did. She wouldn’t come back till it was done, which was odd for her. It never takes her long to do scans with how technically advanced she is.
So now, you and Miguel are practically playing hide and seek to dig up anything about where the anomaly could be. This dimension was a strange one, it was filled with tunnels… Very echoey… Not good. You two were spilt up to cover more ground, but no luck.
“Damn.” You whined, arms crossed as you kicked a rock. “Where the fffu-. Bro oughta be a D1 camouflager. Where’s Lyla?”
“Dunno’. It doesn’t take Lyla this long to make a scan.” He grumbled with slight annoyance. “Gotta run another test…”
The two of you continued to look endlessly for the villain, but as expected, yet again, no luck. This was frustrating Miguel, everything he planned didn’t fall into line like it was supposed to and he hated that.
It was then that the two of you decided to regroup. Reunited, you took five and leaned against the wall.
“I’m getting the suspicion that the signal is messing with Lyla’s functions… How though…” Miguel muttered to himself trying to figure the dilemma out.
Then, in the silence, you blew a raspberry. The noise bounced off the walls.
This earned you a peeved look from Miguel.
“What?” You asked innocently, holding back a grin.
Miguel somehow managed to roll his eyes despite his mask being up, and turned away from you.
Your comedic side began to surface… This mission is just too stale.
“… Hey.” You spoke up, grabbing his attention with him slightly turning his head to you. “… Knock, knock.”
“Don’t.”
“C’mon… Knock knock…” You pressed. Miguel sighed.
“…. Who’s there.”
“To.”
“… To who.“
“No,” You snickered, “to whom.”
Miguel had the most disappointed head shake known to man when you were trying not to laugh. You gain composure, only by the slightest.
“Okay that was wack- Uh- Oo Oo- What do you-”
“No no- No more.” He said in a hushed yet loud tone.
“What do you call a spider with 10 eyes?” You asked blatantly.
“What-” He said annoyed.
“A spi-i-i-i-i-i-der.”
Okay, that was good.
Miguel sighed heavily… He sounds like he’s smiling, but you didn’t wanna believe it. “Alright alright.”
“One more one more.” You said quickly as you thought up another one. “What… Do you call two Mexicans that play basketball?”
Oh BROTHER.
“… WhAt…” Miguel had to look away.
“Juan on Juan.”
Miguel had to take a deeeeep breath with that one.
“… Okay.” There was a hint of laughter. “You done?”
“How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it!” You couldn’t help but laugh. Miguel snickered slightly…
“I… Stop stop we-“ He takes another deep breath, not wanting to laugh. “We need to focus and figure out-“
“Aye aye- I asked how much a roof cost… He said it was on the house-”
“(Y/N). Shut UP.” Miguel was trying to be serious but you were weakening his ability to keep composure, so he demanded with a slight laugh. “We can’t- We gotta mission and you’re-”
“Why was Mrs. Clause unsatisfied with Santa Clause? Because he only comes once a year.”
Miguel nearly lost it, he quietly shouted. “YOU’RE NOT HELPING.”
“ONE MORE… PROMISE….”
“Fine go go go.”
“How do you get a Mexican uncle’s attention?”
Miguel has a feeling he knows where this is going… “How?”
“Tapatio on the shoulder.”
Got him.
He nearly yelled before he covered his mouth. He gave you a playful punch on the arm and it caused the both of you to laugh together.
Hearing him laugh was something you’ve never thought you needed. He had the most goofy laugh you heard, he even snorted, which caused an echo in the tunnels.
“I can’t take you no where.” Miguel said as he was trying to calm down.
It was then Lyla FINALLY comes back with a scan. However, she was holding her oversized phone. She had recorded the whole exchange. You and Miguel looked at her with shocked faces.
“Saving that for memories.” Lyla said as she did just that.
“Lyla? Where have you been? What took you so long?” Miguel said with a clear smile on his face because he hasn’t winded down yet.
“It didn’t take me long to do the scan, I was just wanting to see if they could get you to crack.”
“… LYLA-“
“You got a cute snort too, like a lil piglet-“
“LY-“
“Also the guy is headed this way.” Lyla explained, pointing down the tunnel, causing the both of you to get yourselves together so you can take the anomaly down.
———————
an extension of the goofy head cannons? yes.
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myabsurddreamjournal · 6 months
Text
Fate (Part 3)
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Soldier boy x Fem! reader
Summary: Reader is a scientist who is forced to work at lab that they keep soldier boy frozen, she talks and cries to him when she is alone, thinking he can't hear her but he hears everything.
her head was on something comfortable and warm, gentle fingers were brushing her hair. Her mother used to this after certain days, when her mind became so loud, all she could think about were the bad thoughts, the things she saw on the news, the things she heard from radio while sitting on the school bus, that dead body of a fox in the road, crushed by a car.
They haunted her. All her life, Even as a child she knew something was wrong with her, because unlike her, none of her friends were in constant fear and sadness. No matter what she did, Laughing or crying, big part of her was always thinking that she wasnt meant to be in this world.
that this world was wrong.
Fingers were on her cheek now, caressing it softly. She chased it with her head,
-"You sure resembe a kitty"
what?
this wasnt her mothers voice.
She opened her eyes in shock, A very familiar face with green eyes was looking down on her.
-"S-soldier boy!?"
-"I was afraid that you hit your head too hard back there"
Suddenly she was aware of sharp ache on the side of her head. But there was something else, her head, it was in his lap! heartbeat starting to speed up, she tried to stand up but his hand on her shoulder prevented it.
"Don't." he said sternly. "You need to lay down for a while"
"O-Okay.."
"H-how? " i mean w-what happened? where am i?"
"in a plane, we are going back to U.S."
she looked at him confusedly.
"You passed out back there, i carried you." he added.
upon hearing this, she looked at the surroundings, giant boxes and packets were everywhere. No seats were in sight. "must be a cargo plane" she thought. But why did she passed out?
she tried to recall past few hours, the sirens, and gunshots, the tall guy telling her to wake him up,
the last thing she remember was throwing that damn ashtray, then..
Him saying her name.
how could he know that?, it was impossible
"it could only happen if he was.." told a voice inside her.
suddenly, a horrible feeling started to form in her gut.
-"h-how do you know my name" she asked with a trembling voice, Praying that answer wouldnt be the one she expected.
-"i heard everyhting you told me."
For a few seconds, she was silent, the weight of what she just heard making her dizzy.
She tried to fight the feeling, not wanting to be so weak in front of him.
But when his hands started to stroke her hair again, her eyes became glassy, she closed them, tears falling on her cheeks,
she couldnt believe it, didn't want to believe it, all this time he was there, hearing her while she was crying and telling everything about her life to him, apologizing to him.
Admiring to him.
Taking his blood. Poking him with needles.
he was aware of everything they did.
She was sobbing now, trying to be quiet, she covered her face with hands but soldier boy pulled them away moments later,
-"Why are you crying doll?" he asked,
-"B-because i-i always found solace at the thought, that you were not in pain anymore, that you were asleep so you couldn't feel it." I never wanted to do the things they told me, the thin-
she couldnt finish because he lifted her chin with his finger, making her look at his eyes directly.
she gasped at what she saw, his green eyes,
they were burning, burning with rage.
she could almost see the flames in them, like in her dreams. The dreams she had since she was a child.
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he leaned towards her and slowly took her arm in his hand, looking at the burn mark there.
-"they will pay for what they did." He said,
-"To you and me."
Notes: I hope you guys liked it! your comments are really important to me, also, do you guys also hate the world? Always feel free to talk to me :)
taglist: @deans-spinster-witch @mfnqueen1 @ponypickle @butchers-girl @verypostcrown
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jjtheresidentbaby · 29 days
Note
Hi! Congrats on 1000 followers!
Could you do a cg! Rafe Cameron x little! Reader with the prompts "shh, go back to sleep. you need it." and "shh shh, no, it's alright. you're fine, shh."
Btw, I love your blog and I’m so happy you’re doing obx fics now!
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ you’re fine ⋆゚⊹ ➢ event masterlist
» rafe cameron x reader
» a/n: hope you don’t mind me taking some creative liberties and making this pouge!reader turned kook!reader
» warnings: set sometime in season 3, talk of canon events, pouge!reader turned kook!reader, pet names, nightmares, angst, crying, hurt/comfort I’m still not sure I like this
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Rafe jolts when you wake up with a choked off scream that quickly turns to a sob, he moves from his place in a chair in the corner of the room to the side of your bed in seconds, already reaching to rub your back.
“Shh, shh, no, it's alright. you're fine, shh.” He soothes and pulls you up into his lap when you reach out for him.
“It’s okay baby, you’re alright.” It’s so gentle coming out of his mouth you’d swear it wasn’t Rafe if it wasn’t for the moonlight coming in through the window lighting up his distraught expression scrunched on his face.
It’s been months of this. Of waking up in nightmares that leave you shaking and grasping for Rafe to be at your side, of Rafe doing absolutely everything he can to comfort you, of you trying to adjust to living in Tannyhill with Rafe rather than back on the Cut near Jj’s house where you grew up. You and Jj don’t talk anymore, none of the pogues give you so much as a sparing glance, they’re all too aware of what side you chose when you didn’t flee off that cargo ship with them- you stayed with Rafe.
“I- I was back there-.” Rafe tightens his arms around you with a low shh that you listen to easily, leaning into his touch and letting him start to rock the both of you in place.
“You’re not there, you’re here with me. We’re safe and back in obx, we never have to be there again.” It’s not the fear that was steadily coursing through your veins on that boat that bothers you, really it isn’t, it’s the look of absolute betrayal that spread over all your old friends’ faces.
It’s something you can’t shake and while you know you made the right decision- you, Rafe, and Barry melted the cross down, you’re all rich, Ward isn’t around to bother you, you’re living a better lifestyle than you’ve ever dreamed- it’s still stomach churning to think about the pogues. You don’t even know where they are right now or what they’ve been up to, once they found out you helped melt the cross that was it, you had hope that maybe they’d see where you were coming from but that crossed the line. A line you truly didn’t think existed.
You grew up on the Cut with them, hell you had problems with Kiara when John B introduced her because she had a house on Figure Eight, you never thought you’d end up on this side of island for anything more than a job or a party, you thought you’d be with them no matter what, that nothing that happened would break the bond between you and the other pogues and now-. If you think about this too much you’ll get a headache.
“Shh, go back to sleep. you need it." The feeling of Rafe’s chin hooking atop your head brings you back to where you are.
“I’m sorry.” After that day on the boat where you had clung to Rafe the second you two were alone, crying and scared, slipped so far into your headspace you couldn’t think about that fact that you were hugging around Rafe Cameron- it feels like all you’ve done is apologize to him. The guilt of absolutely everything you do eats at you, no matter what choice you make it ends up hurting someone, you end up being the problem.
“You don’t need to apologize, you didn’t do anything wrong.” Rafe replies with zero hesitation as he always done. He’s never questioned your loyalty to him or said you need to get over what happened with the pogues, in some weird way you think understands it, he doesn’t have anyone but you and Barry left. And even then- Barry betrayed him once, you can still feel the tension between them at times because of it.
“You’re always taking care of me and I’m still a mess.” It took all of two seconds for Rafe to jump into caregiver mode on that boat when he realized that you were regressed, you don’t think he’s ever gotten out of it. Months later and nothing has changed, he’s taken on the role as your caregiver without a single question or judgement made, as if he already knows everything he needs to know to watch you.
“Shush baby, it’s not your fault those pogues put you through so much.”
Logically you know Rafe’s version of events are skewed and probably will be no matter what you say- but it still hurts a little to think he blames them in full. It was your own fault, you went along with every plan they came up with from that first day John B said you guys should go out looking for the royal merchant after that storm, and even if you eventually felt out of your depth and like things were getting too hectic and you wanted to tell them to stop- to go back to how you all were before- it’s still on you.
“They’re never going to forgive me.” You whisper and truly don’t mean to, that was supposed to stay in your head.
“They’ve put you through hell, you aren’t the one that needs to be forgiven, you made the right decision. The smart one.” You nod at Rafe’s serious but soft tone and curl farther into his chest.
“Yeah, I’m glad I have you.” Everything else aside- you’d do anything to keep Rafe around, he’s there for you in a way none of the pogues ever have been and you can’t ignore that.
“You’ll always have me baby.” He presses a kiss to the side of your forehead and lays you both back against the bed, shifting slightly so you can lay over his chest and he can pull a blanket over both of you.
“Try and sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up.” You hum to Rafe, letting your eyes slip shut in contentment. He will be here when you wake up, you know that, you’d never doubt that, and it makes some of that guilt slip off your shoulders.
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reputationmunson · 1 year
Note
Hii I was wondering if you could write a Steve Harrington x Henderson!reader where she’s like 2 or 3 years younger than him and she’s in love with him and he knows about it but he pushes her away because of the age gap but when they’re in the upside down she gets hurt and he freaks out and they have an argument and he realizes his feelings for her. Sorry if it’s confusing :) she/her pronouns please
I am so sorry this took me so long! I’m already a perfectionist and then i’m even worse when it comes to requests because i’m scared of disappointing people that request things. I hope you enjoy and thank you for the request and being patient!
Bloodshed, Crimson Clover | s.h x fem!reader
content: angsty, mentions of unrequited feelings, reader is 20 and steve is 22, blood/injuries, the upside down, mentions of death, happy ending!, henderson!reader(i made reader adopted so that way there’s no indication that she has to resemble dustin) 
Word count: 2.3k
What is it that causes such an incessant need for someone’s validation? Especially when that person has never even given you an inkling of recognition. 
Is it low self-esteem? Is it to fill a void? Or is it because your “adorable”, “genius” younger brother overshadowed you for the majority of your life? 
If you would get a B+ on a test, Dustin would come home and say he got the highest grade in his class. When you got your driver's license, Dustin had just invented one of his gadgets. Those were just two examples out of many instances. 
You know it was never intentional or malicious. You considered him to be your best friend and your mom always talks about how excited you were about having a baby brother. You were adopted as a baby, but biology never mattered much to you. Your mom was your mom and your brother was your brother. No ands, ifs, or buts about it. 
Your issue with approval didn’t start until your freshman year of high school. When you met him. 
Steve Harrington, to be specific. 
It’s cliche, right? The quiet girl who’s a bit of a loner having a huge, almost embarrassing, crush on the popular guy who practically runs the school. 
Much like the rest of the girls, you fell victim to the fascination of Steve. 
As expected, he never paid much attention to you. There was a time period during sophomore year that he would occasionally copy off your tests in science class. He tried to be subtle about it, but that only made it more obvious. It never bothered you, though. It made you feel special, however silly that sounds. 
Then, the unthinkable happened. your little brother, who was still in middle school at the time, befriended Steve. 
To say it was mind boggling would be an understatement. 
Here you were, spending your first two years of high school trying to get his attention, and out of the blue Steve drives Dustin to a school dance. Ever since then, he became a glorified babysitter and mentor to Dustin. Even now, after all these years since Dustin has grown up, their relationship remained the same. 
“I’m always gonna look out for you, buddy” you once overheard Steve say to your brother, making your heart swell. 
You thought for sure this was going to be your chance to get closer to Steve, maybe you’d be lucky enough for him to fall for you the way you fell for him. A silly school girl crush had turned into a pining, unrequited mess. You felt like a fool the way you would try and put yourself out there, only for him to drift further and further from you. 
“Hey, Steve, wanna watch a movie after you drop Dustin off at the arcade?” you’d ask and he’d reply “Sorry, I can’t. Gotta do laundry tonight” or some other half-assed excuse and pity smile to try and let you down easily. 
The way you acted was cumbersome. Laughing at his jokes too loudly when they weren’t even really that funny, putting on your best outfit when you knew he was coming over, and baking him cookies as a ‘thank you’ for taking care of Dustin. You weren’t subtle about your crush, making it even worse that the feelings weren’t reciprocated. 
At first, you chalked it up to being a sophomore while he was a senior, then being a junior once he graduated. After that, you blamed nothing but yourself. Were you not pretty enough? Not funny enough? Not good enough? Too upfront with how you felt? Too desperate?
The same questions run around your mind almost every night before you fall asleep, hoping that one day maybe it’ll hit him that he wants you just as much or maybe you’ll wake up one day and be over him, which is the more likely option. 
At least it was, until tonight. 
_
“Jesus christ, y/n, you could’ve gotten yourself killed!” Steve reprimands for what feels like the thousandth time. His arm supports your waist as your arm is wrapped around his shoulders as you walk into his house.
“So you’ve said” you grunt, barely audible due to the fact you feel like you won’t make it if you use up all your energy to speak. 
_
A gate had opened to the upside down, which you only learned about two years ago. You all thought the gate was closed for good, but alternate dimensions seem to be a bit unpredictable. 
You refused to let Dustin go with you and Steve agreed. Both of you had one thing in common; you’d do anything to protect him. It was only you and Steve that had gone and it wasn’t exactly how you pictured having alone time with him. 
After what felt like hours of going in circles, you strayed from him in an attempt to find your way out and then planned to go back to him then lead the way back home. Steve ran after you, but ended up losing you. 
All of the sudden, the weirdest looking creature you’d ever seen came out of nowhere, scratching and biting at you. You fought hard, finally grabbing hold of your weapon and killing whatever the hell was trying to kill you. 
You laid there for what felt like an eternity, covered in blood with blurry vision and the feeling of slipping away from your body. 
“Oh my god, y/n!” you had heard him shout and he sounded like he was a million miles away. “Nonono, what happened?” he kneeled on the ground, hands flew to try your wounds to try and stop the bleeding
“I tripped” you attempted to joke, hissing in pain when you let out a small chuckle. He didn’t laugh, though. Didn’t even crack a smile. He just looked at you with wide, concerned eyes. “I’m gonna help you stand, okay?”
“I-I c-can’t” you began to sob. “It hurts so bad, Steve”
“I know, I know, but we gotta get you out of here. I’m gonna clean you up and make you feel better, but you gotta stand up” He tries to help you up, but you can’t do it. “Just leave me. You need to get out of here. Please don’t make me move, please” you beg. 
“I can’t lose you, y/n. We can’t lose you. Think about Dustin and your mom and your friends a-and me” you swear it sounds like he’s choking on a sob. What does he mean he can’t lose you? You barely mutter out an ‘okay’ and muster up all of your energy to move. 
Somehow, you escape the hellhole and you don’t remember how you make it back to his house, but you do. You’re battered and bruised, but you're safe with Steve’s arm around you, nonetheless. You’re gonna have to find a way to send the weirdest thank you note to that demonic creature. 
_
Steve runs around the bathroom frantically, gathering every possible first-aid item as you sit on the sink counter. 
“We gotta get you cleaned up first, alright?’’ you give a small nod and he turns the shower on before rushing out of the bathroom, going as quickly as he can so you aren’t left alone too long. 
“Here take these pain pills” he says when he returns, handing you the pills and water. “And I’m gonna put this stool in the shower so you can sit down, okay? Oh, and here are some clean clothes and towels” he’s talking so fast, still in a panic. “M’gonna be fine, Steve. Don’t freak out”
“Can you, um, get undressed by yourself?” he asks, avoiding eye contact. “mhmm” you respond and he helps you down from the counter. “I’m gonna be right outside that door. Let me know when you’re dressed” 
Steve shuts the door behind him and sits on the floor right outside, just like he said he’d do. 
The hot water bites at your wounds, blood and dirt flow down the drain and you can’t stop the tears that start to burst. You almost died tonight, but Steve saved you. He’s still saving you. 
His words echo throughout your mind. “I can’t lose you’’ he had said. Did you hallucinate or something? Did he actually say that? 
On the other side of the door, Steve sits with his head in his hands and trying to quiet his sobs. He’s seen and experienced things unimaginable, but the image of you lying on the ground almost lifeless makes him sick. He thought you were already dead. The feeling of his heart dropping to his stomach hasn’t gone away. 
Steve has never thought of a world without you in it and now that he has, regrets swirl in his head. 
He remembers you in high school. The introverted girl with an obvious crush on him that he never thought twice about because let's be honest, he was no stranger to girls being attracted to him. At the time, Steve only thought of you as the girl two years younger than him who would get flustered everytime he sat next to her in science class.
 As time went on, he knew your feelings never went away, but it took him almost losing you to realize how he feels about you. A world without you in it would be a world not worth being a part of. 
Steve hears the shower turn off and your groan as you get dressed. He quickly wipes his tears and tries to compose himself. 
“Steve” you mutter, voice meek. “Are you dressed?” he asks. “yeah. Can you help me now, please?” he’s never opened a door faster in his life.
Despite the look of defeat on your face, you still look beautiful. Especially in his clothes. 
“Can you sit on the counter?” he asks and you hoist yourself up with a grunt. “I’m gonna lift up your shirt then clean the wounds with rubbing alcohol. Might sting a little” he informs you. 
When the alcohol hits your wounds, you grab Steve’s shoulder and squeeze. “sorry” you mutter. “s’fine. I know this hurts. I don’t mind” he assures you. “If you wanna talk as a distraction, that’s fine. It’s helped me in the past” he suggests. 
“What did you mean when you said you couldn’t lose me?” you ask, getting straight to the point.
“I don’t think i said that” he lies. “you did” you counter. “I said everyone else couldn’t lose you” he responds. He’s too scared to tell you how he really feels, even after all this. “Are you really going to argue with a dying person?” “You aren’t dying. You’re fine”
“Then why were you crying?” you argue. “I wasn’t. I’m tired” he lies again. “You’re impossible” you scoff. “I’m impossible? You’re the idiot who ran away and almost got killed!” he exclaims. “I was trying to find a way home!” you defend yourself and he rolls his eyes. 
He stops cleaning your wounds to look at you. “And how did that go? You do understand that you almost died, don’t you? It was so fucking stupid”
“Then why didn’t you just leave me like I asked you to?’
“Dustin would never forgive me” he states. “Is that all?” he hesitates for a second
“Yes” 
“Tell me the truth” you demand. “That is the truth,” he insists. “I don’t believe you”
“Fuck, y/n! What do you want me to say? That if I lost you I would never fucking recover? That if I had to go the rest of my life without hearing the way you laugh, I’d never smile again? Or do you wanna know that the thought of you being gone would kill me and I would never forgive myself. Ever” 
“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it or ‘cause you know that’s just wanna hear” you look down at your lap and a tear falls down your cheek. “I’m not and I hate that this is what it took for me to realize that I lo-” he stops himself and you look up at him with wide eyes. “Do you really feel that way?” you whisper and he nods, huffing out a sigh. 
“Can you kiss me?”
“I will once I put the bandages on. I promise” he swears “They can wait. I’ve been waiting for five years”
He rests his hand on your cheek and you try to lean in, but whimper in pain when you move. “Sit still, baby. Let me take care you”
Steve Harrington just called you ‘baby’. If you found out you died and went to heaven, you wouldn’t be surprised. 
Steve leans in slowly, pressing kisses to the corners of your lips before fully placing his lips on yours. You sigh into the kiss, feeling the weight of a thousand pounds being lifted off of you. His lips are as soft as you imagined they would be and his hand that cradles your face makes you feel safer than you’ve ever been. 
“I love you” he whispers against your lips “I love you, too. I always have” 
“Way to one up me” he teases. “You better get used to it ‘cause you loooovvvee me” 
“Yeah, I do, so you don’t have to write sad love poems in your diary anymore”
“You read those?!” you gasp and he laughs. “Dustin told me about them. They sounded like shakespeare, you should write a damn book or something”
“Shut up and kiss me again”
He kisses you again and again, only stopping to finish tending to your wounds. When you start to cry over the scars you’re gonna have, he promises that he’s going to kiss and adore them for the rest of your lives. You don’t doubt him for a second
Tonight was equally the worst and best night of your life, but you’d do it all over again for him in a heartbeat.
_
thank you for reading!
_
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itzkirav · 11 months
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PETER B PARKER
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Peter B Parker x fem reader
Prompt: you and Peter are married and have mayday together :3 just hcs
You and Peter would be married for 6 years and finally decide to have a child together. Peter would be a little scared however he really wanted to be with you, And he loved you so much.
Once you were pregnant he would always do stuff for you no matter what, even if you weren't showing yet. And you were capable of doing stuff on your own.
He would take a break from being Spiderman and take care of you and your unborn baby.
Once you start to really show, he was getting nervous. What if he was a bad father? What if something happens to him as Spider-Man and you end up as a single mother? You assured him that none of those were gonna happen.
Then you have Mayday. He loves Mayday so much. He always has her in his arms. You don't even get a chance to carry her. Eventually, you do. Probably for a couple of minutes.
He's always going into her nursery room to check up on her. Especially when she cries at night. Always feeding her etc. You don't even do anything because he always taking care of her and holding her.
Lots of photos of her. His favorites are when you and Mayday are in the photo together. He can not stop taking pictures.
Would protect the both of you no matter what.
Eventually, Mayday becomes a daddy's girl... it's hard to say it but it's true:’(
He goes behind your back and takes her to work. Even though you told him not to.
*incoming call from wife❤️*
“Uh oh”
“I think we’re in trouble, well I am” he says softly to Mayday while she’s in the Baby carrier.
*he picks up*
“Hey honey what’s wrong?”
“Peter” you say annoyed
“I know you have Mayday with you”
“Whaatt? No, I don't have her. What are you talking about?”
“Don’t lie to me Peter” you start to pinch you nose bridge”
“Uh oh, your mother is real mad when she calls me by my first name” he says away from the phone to Mayday. While the baby was babbling to her father.
“Okay fine I do have Mayday. She’s safe and sound don’t worry honey I won’t let anything happen to her”
“The last time you said that you lost her” you said annoyed again
“Okay well that was one time okay. It’s won’t happen again”
You sighed “Fine, but keep her safe if something happens to her, your sleeping on the couch tonight” You ended the call
“Well Mayday you heard the women” He looks down and sees Mayday is gone. “Well I’m for sure sleeping on the couch tonight”….
You were pissed when you found out. And he did sleep on the couch.
You were taking care of Mayday from now on and wouldn’t even let Peter hold her. Basically torching the man. He Begged so much but you would ignore him. He started to follow your orders for now on.You knew how much he loves her but it’s his punishment…
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neon-vocalist · 8 months
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things i used to do that hurt my headmates: a non-all-inclusive list, vecause i think it is important to acknowledge when we as hosts do things wrong, but also that mistakes are a part of learning you’re plural and everyone makes them.
1. joke that i didn’t want them there / give them a poor reception. my immediate reaction to “hi, i’m here” used to be “no the fuck you’re not.” they’d say “hi!” and i’d say “no.” especially if they were fictives. they’d give me their name, and i’d go “ohhhh, nooooo, i refuse to believe it,” and it was funny to me and to my friends, but it ended up severely impacting the way they felt around me.
2. see them for their jobs. for a long time, my headmates were more like co workers. i would say things to them that kind of just boiled them down to what they did, from “why are you here? we don’t need protecting” to “i don’t get why so-and-so split, they don’t do anything for me.” now i make an effort to see them for who they are, not what they do for me.
3. lock up our persecutors. i know many systems who’ve done this and many systems who say they will if they need to. i have been in spaces where people advertise “alter jail” and things like that, or give tips on how to create one. while our version of isolating our persecutor was putting him in a tupperware container and not a jail cell, it’s still imprisonment and i don’t think i need to explain why this one is harmful.
4. shit talk them behind their backs. i guess i still kind of do this. i panic and i take the side of whoever’s gossiping about them, and i usually end up saying things about them i would never actually believe. i need to get better at standing up for them.
5. give everyone info on them and their dirty laundry. i used to use my headmates as conversation points. “oh we split someone new btw, they’re x and y and do z,” or “oh, did i tell you about the drama with a and b?” when really the drama is none of my or my friend’s business, and they end up feeling betrayed that i’d tell someone about them like that.
6. act like i was The Valid One. i acted like i got to make the decisions, like everyone revolves around me, and that it was truly MY system— i would order them around, make them do shit i didn’t want to do, and hold myself higher than them. it was me and my alters, and i always got priority.
7. force them to speak. i would make them introduce themselves to everyone we talked to and put introductions in our journal and private server. it didn’t matter if they didn’t want to be known, to me it was essential that all our friends had all the information. even at the expense of my headmates’ comfort.
i don’t do this stuff anymore, and i know it’s fucked up. there’s also things i’ve seen other hosts do that are harmful, and i do my best to call them on it (gently, of course). but i think it’s important to acknowledge that we fuck up and we’ve moved on instead of pretending it never happened and we were always perfect.
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