#although hes like that normally anyways…

[heartsforvenus]

imagine dating johnny...

✿ you'd definitely be someone he picked up in hopes of turning you into dinner if you catch my drift

✿ but i think you'd intrigue him so much that he just couldn't kill you

✿ he probably wouldn't bring you around his family

✿ probably lowkey stalks you before and after you start dating

✿ he definitely just takes you out to bars and calls that a date

✿ don't think he'd do anything really romantic like taking you out to dinner

✿ if he did, he'd probably make you pay

✿ he would give you gifts that he stole from his victims, like jewellery and clothes

✿ extremely possessive, duh

✿ any man that looks in your direction will be found dead in his own home

✿ once the two of you became more serious, he'd introduce you to his family

✿ carefully, of course, he didn't want to scare you away

✿ you'd probably meet cook first, as he's the most relatively normal one

✿ you'd meet him when you went to visit johnny at work at the gas station

✿ johnny would get more comfortable and invite you around to his house and the family house

✿ he knew if you got too freaked out and wanted to leave him, he'd always have the upper hand, no matter how hard it would be to kill you it was family first

✿ if you reacted well to meeting his family, let's just say you'd better plan to stick around forever

✿ i imagine bubba would love you the most out of all of the sawyers, if you're kind to him he'd melt like an ice cream

✿ hitchhiker and sissy would probably like you, too, although you found them a little eccentric

✿ cook would like you if you helped around the house

✿ now, nancy would probably be conflicted about you. she wouldn't like that you distract her johnny from his work and his family, but she wouldn't do anything against you because she could tell how happy you made johnny

✿ just don't stay alone with her too long

✿ johnny would bring you to his shack, but you'd have to clean up after him

✿ how on earth does he live with all of those beer bottles on the floor???

✿ i'm sure you'd have to tell him that you love him first as he isn't one to share his feelings

✿ and he probably wouldn't even say it back that first time

✿ he's not the type of guy for marriage, and he doesn't have the money for it anyway

✿ if you really wanted it, he'd steal you a ring and just call you his wife

✿ overall, he's toxic, but he does love you. he's just a product of his environment, and if he'd grown up with any other family he'd be the best boyfriend ever

#Johnny Sawyer #texas chainsaw game #tcm game #Johnny tcm #Johnny slaughter #Johnny Sawyer x reader #Johnny slaughter x reader #x reader #horror #Texas chainsaw massacre #tcm #fanfic #fanfiction #horror fanfic #heartsforvenus #gn!reader

[pocket-lad]

Grief

A short story about death and the feeling of helplessness that comes along with it, but from the POV of a borrower.

~

“Tea?” Geoff offered, knowing the answer already.

“I’m okay, thanks,” Rowan said for the thousandth time since she met him. She settled down on the mantle in her usual spot and swung her legs over the edge. She then pulled her needles and thread out of her bag and continued on the blanket she’d been knitting for the past week or so. The passage of time didn’t really take up much space in the borrower’s mind. Each day was the same. Each day she hoped for one more day. That was until she met Geoff.

Geoff was old. Rowan wasn’t sure how old exactly, but his hair was very gray, bordering on white, and deep set wrinkles lined his face. He moved slowly and his hands shook and his voice croaked every time he spoke. She hoped she would get to be that old.

Rowan always took care of herself, but Geoff’s knowledge of her existence combined with his patience and kindness made taking care of herself a lot easier. He offered her food, water, tea - always with the tea. Whatever she needed, he insisted that it was no problem to retrieve it. And it wasn’t like she’d make a dent in anything.

But Rowan saw the way he struggled to get out of his chair. She saw the pained, scrunched up look in his face whenever he had to reach for something. She was capable of retrieving her own food, and she didn’t want to make him go through that just for her. And now, she didn’t even have to sneak around!

The two often enjoyed each other's company in silence - Geoff in his chair and Rowan on the mantle. He would watch TV or read the paper or do his crossword puzzles. She would knit or write or organize or simply just sit and watch. Geoff didn’t seem to mind.

There wasn’t much to talk about, anyway. Neither of them went anywhere or did anything new. Geoff could tell her about bingo, he guessed, but she was probably far from interested. Rowan could tell him about the mouse she killed, she guessed, but he was probably far from interested. And so, they sat in silence most of the time. Except when he offered her tea and she declined.

Although, maybe she would try tea today. It was the same old, same old, day in and day out. Rowan liked the stability of a routine, but sometimes the routine got a little boring. Maybe tea was a good way to break it.

She took a break from staring at the pink fabric in her hands to ask. The question was on the tip of her tongue when she realized Geoff looked different than normal. He was sweating pretty hard and his eyes were unfocused. She learned that older people acted or looked weird from time to time and often fell asleep without notice (that had been scary the first time), but this was different. Bad different.

“Geoff?” she tried.

He didn’t seem to hear her. He clutched at his chest as his breathing became strained.

“Geoff?!” she tried again, much more urgently.

He still didn’t respond.

Rowan abandoned her project and whipped out her hook. It was a flimsy paper clip attached to a piece of thread, but it did the job. She lodged it into the mantle and leapt over the edge. It was more of a controlled free fall than a climb, but she had to get to him to see if he was okay.

She sprinted over to the base of his chair, keeping an eye on his slippered feet, especially since he wasn’t at full attention. In less than a minute, she was on the thick, plush arm of the chair, looking up at his face. His eyes were closed and his arms were now limp, meaning he was no longer conscious.

Rowan kicked an arm. It didn’t budge. She shoved at it as hard as she could, and still it didn’t budge. She called his name repeatedly, and nothing happened.

Something was really, really wrong, and Rowan had absolutely no idea what to do.

Looking around for anything, her eyes fell on the phone sitting innocently in its receiver. She could call someone! She could call someone and they could get help!

Rowan thoughtlessly and recklessly leaped across the large gap between the chair and the side table. She landed with a loud ‘oof’ and slid on the newspaper, but kept herself going. She didn’t slow down as she approached the phone, and she threw her whole body at it, tackling it off the receiver.

A loud monotone note rang out from its speaker. What now? Who to call?

Rowan glanced back at Geoff, still motionless in his seat. She had to move fast. Think !

911! That was the Bean emergency number! She’d heard it enough through the TV and probably from Geoff or one of the people he had over once every blue moon. It didn’t matter.

Rowan shoved on the buttons and hit send. It rang once before someone picked up.

“ 911, what’s your emergency ?”

Rowan was tongue tied. This was a real, live Bean on the phone. She couldn’t talk to another Bean! It had taken her forever to work up the courage to talk to Geoff! But one more look back at the man told her she had to, or he might be in some real trouble.

For Geoff.

“ Hello ?”

“Hello, yes, hi. Um…My…my…Geoff. He’s not…he’s not…he looked really bad and then he passed out and I think he needs help!”

“ Is he breathing ?”

“I can’t tell.”

“ What is your address ?”

“I…I don’t know!” Rowan was frustrated with herself for knowing so little. An address seemed irrelevant, since she actively did not want people to know where she lived. And she was unable to provide any useful information about Geoff’s condition because she couldn’t get that close to him while on the phone. It would take too long.

After a grueling, frantic conversation, the operator assured Rowan that help was on the way.

Rowan let the other person hang up. She paced around on the table, biting her nails and keeping her eyes trained on Geoff. He still hadn’t moved, and she really couldn’t tell if he was breathing.

Minutes passed, and Rowan found herself stroking his hand. The skin was wrinkly, tough, and covered in age spots. She never touched a Bean before. Geoff never touched her and she never touched him, and she liked to keep it that way. But touching his hand, holding his finger - it kept her grounded in reality. It kept her thoughts from drifting too far off into worry-land in the torturous minutes it took the medical Beans to arrive.

And then they did, and Rowan couldn’t stay in the vicinity any longer. The sound of sirens caught her attention, so she placed a quick kiss on Geoff’s hand and rappelled down her hook to hide underneath the lower shelf of the table.

A bunch of men burst in through the thick front door. The ground quaked with each of their booming footsteps. They all said fast, loud words she didn’t really understand, there was a lot of commotion, and then the door slammed again and the house went silent.

Rowan let out a long breath. Anxiety still coursed through her body, and she realized the worst part still wasn’t over. The worst part would be waiting.

She had no idea what was wrong with him or how serious it was, and she had no way to find out either. She would just have to wait.

And wait, she did. For days. Each day, Rowan perched herself on the mantle and stared at the full cup of tea sitting on the table. It still had the tea bag in it, but it was long since cold. She told herself that the medical Beans were just busy, or they were working really hard, or Geoff just needed to rest in the hospital for a while so they could quadruple check that he was alright. Each day Rowan told herself a new thing.

Her unfinished blanket sat with the needles in it by her bed for a long time. Every time she went to pick the project up, her hands simply wouldn't move.

Rowan meticulously kept track of the days. It was a struggle to remember at first, but she needed to know how long he’d been gone. Why? She wasn’t sure. It wasn’t like she knew what a reasonable amount of time was, and even if she did, she couldn’t do anything about it. She couldn’t even open the front door. Rowan felt unbelievably helpless. Undeniably small.

If only he warned her! If only she moved a little faster! If only, if only, if only, if only.

A week later, Rowan laid on her bed, staring at the ceiling. She barely ate anything since the incident, and her stomach growled at her miserably, but she just couldn’t find the strength.

Until the unmistakable sound of an opening door echoed in her ears.

Throwing caution to the wind, Rowan sprinted to the mantle. She burst through the small crack in the wall and pushed all the way to the edge, ready to see Geoff with her own eyes.

It wasn’t the sheer drop off the cliff to the floor below that caused her to falter. It was the unknown Bean that was in Geoff’s house. Without Geoff.

Rowan’s arms pinwheeled as she backed up and hid behind a picture frame. She shouldn’t have been so quick, so careless. That Bean could have spotted her! But she wouldn’t go back to the walls just yet. She had to know what this Bean was doing. She gave herself ten seconds to calm her beating heart, and then she’d peek back around to see what was going on.

The person looked incredibly familiar, that was for certain, but Rowan couldn’t place why. She didn’t even know any other Beans. It was a young woman, maybe in her early thirties. She had close cut, mousy brown hair and a sharp jawline. She wore a beige sweater and nice pants. This told Rowan nothing.

The woman had a distant look on her face. She stood in the middle of the living room doing absolutely nothing, which was odd. Beans were always doing something . And then the woman started to sob.

Uh oh.

Rowan didn’t know what to do. Was she supposed to do anything? Was this lady even supposed to be in Geoff’s house? And then it dawned on her. This was Daisy. And if Daisy was crying, that meant…

Rowan’s heart sank, but before she could even process it, the Bean’s eyes landed directly on her.

Rowan froze.

The shock in Daisy’s eyes was unmistakable. It was the same shock Geoff had in his eyes when he first found her. And just as with Geoff, the shock faded almost instantly and gave way to something else. For Geoff, it had been amusement. For Daisy, it was embarrassment. She sniffled and wiped at her eyes, clearly self-conscious about crying in front of someone else, but she didn’t make a move toward the mantle.

Rowan swallowed thickly as the silence stretched between them. Daisy’s mouth hung open, unsure what to say. There was a tiny person on the mantle. In her dad’s house. And they were staring right back at her.

“Are you…,” her voice cracked. She cleared her throat and tried again. “Are you the mystery caller?”

Rowan nodded with wide eyes. Then, realizing there was no way Daisy could see that, she squeaked out, “Yes.”

Daisy shook her head in disbelief. This had been a really shitty day, and now it was weird, too. She looked down at the phone knocked off its receiver. There would have been no one to put it back after her dad was rushed off to the hospital.

Slowly, Daisy approached the small person. “It’s alright. You can come out.”

But instead of coming out, Rowan backed further behind the picture.

“No! Thank you, I…If you hadn’t called, he would have…” Daisy had to stop talking or she’d start crying again. She squeezed her eyes shut to keep her emotions at bay. She took two deep breaths. “Thank you…I’m Daisy, what’s-”

“I know,” Rowan interrupted from behind the frame. Her back pressed into it so hard she thought she’d send it over the edge. She wanted Daisy to finish her first sentence. If Rowan hadn’t called, then Geoff would have what ? She slowly turned back around and jumped when Daisy was a couple feet closer than before. Not quite within grabbing distance, but she would be soon.

“Hey, hey, hey, hey. Calm down. It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you. How did you…How did you know my dad?”

Rowan studied Daisy’s face. Her soft brown eyes begged for Rowan’s trust. They were sad. They were looking for comfort. The same way Geoff’s did so long ago. She took a shaky breath and revealed more of herself.

“I live here,” she said quietly.

Daisy seemed taken aback by this. She honestly didn’t know what she expected. “Oh. Oh, um, okay.” She blinked a couple times as if that would help clear things up.

“Is he okay?” Rowan asked shyly. That was honestly all that mattered. If the Bean was really out to get her, she’d deal with it later.

Daisy squeezed her eyes shut again. “No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “No, he’s…he’s gone. He passed away.”

#tw: death #g/t #gt #giant/tiny #size difference #short little story I've been thinking about

[taeiris]

new semester new saga of ari class doodles

#i keep having visions of troy being a jackass in s5 #bc of hellfire and will being back #i want to pull my hair out #maybe he’ll d word giggles #would be a good segway for mean angsty mike tho #although hes like that normally anyways… #GET HIM FOR ME WHEELER! #three waterfalls #local village gate #byler #byler fanart #stranger things #will byers #mike wheeler #stranger things fanart #will byers fanart #fanart #mike wheeler fanart #stranger things 5 #irisart!!!

[lotus-pear]

i think you guys are onto smth..

i unironically got invested in this HELP

#WHERES THE FIC AT IF SOMEONE WRITES THIS I WILL PAY THEM A HUNDRED DOLLARS😭😭 #kunikida serving the country while dazai's serving cunt😔 #dazai was born to malewife but forced to manipulate and i think that's the greatest tragedy of bsd #anyway some facts i would like to share abt this au thay i came up w while drawing!! #takes place in 1939 (start of wwii) and there was a mandatory draft that required one male over eighteen from each house to serve #both of them are still twenty two and had been engaged for abt two years before getting married that year #newlyweds! unfortunately kuni had to go fight and they were seperated :( #before the war kunikida was a math teacher at the local high school and dazai obviously managed the household and didn't work #he's hopeless at cooking and meal prep even w recipie books so they either get those prepackaged meals or kuni makes dinner when he gets ba #so like when he's making lunch for kunikida he normally just packs a basic sandwich w raw fruit #kunikida always appreciates the effort even tho hes probably sick of having the same thing everyday but he won't complain abt it #when kunikida joined the army he was relieved that the mess hall had better food than dazai #he was the only one in his platoon that never complained abt the food so his fellow soldiers assumed it was bc he came from a tough bg #when in reality he was just used to being poisoned on a daily basis from his dumbass husbands cooking and was hardly fazed from army ration #they write to each other although its more dazai sending and kuni receiving bc hes off fighting and doesnt have time to write back #dazai talks abt life on the homefront and how he has to grow a victory garden (everything is DYING HE CANT EVEN RAISE TOMATOES) #and kuni writes abt his fellow soldiers and how the war is going and when he thinks he'll be home and how he misses sleeping in a bed #ANYWAY yea thought i'd share sry for infodumping in the tags again #this post is for like the four ppl that care abt this specific flavor of knkdz so hopefully this gets four notes at least #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #kunikida doppo #doppo kunikida #kunikidazai #knkdz #lotus draws #bro sry for posting at two in the morning i couldnt sleep until i got this out of my head they have infested my brain

[skrunksthatwunk]

ugh nauseating the way eiji looks at ash when he's pouting about their little lover's quarrel

some serious faggotry happening in the new york public library

#eiji's like hey... babe please stop killing people. i don't think you're that kind of person and ash is like yeah i AM etc etc and then when #they make up as if they Weren't Arguing About Murder. can't stay mad at you type shit but it's about ash's whole killing out of guilt over #shorter thing... oghhh somebody's doubling downnnn somebody's getting bloodier because they're scared of losing people oooohhhh #and eiji's like psh he's so cute when he's pouting though //>w<// #they're silly. something's wrong with them both #eiji's a normal boy my ass he is NOT he's a freak he's like dan cain to me #although i would not say ash is particularly herbert-esque (herbert west-esque? hm. whatever) #anyway #banana fish #asheiji

[heavenb3nt]

Anyways. Academy era designs

#koschei has curlier hair normally but this is drawn in an era where he’s NAWT taking care of himself so his hair hasn’t been washed in like #a week #I draw him with his hands bruised up from rapping the back of his hands in beat with the drums btw #and the eye bags because he CANT sleep with that racket in his head #also. theta has a lot of freckles and moles and koschei sometimes gets a pen and connects them like a connect the dots #just trust me alright trust me so hard #theta has a body that we’d call afab but theta’s always been more comfortable with male centric terms so everyone just perceives him as a m #although I so she/he theta. theta she/he truth #but pronouns ≠ gender so it’s okay #anyways anyways #thoschei #doctor who academy era #koschei oakdown #theta sigma #doctor who #the deca #(well. two of them) #aura’s posts #our art #idk how long the academy has people for like what age they graduate but they’re meant to be the timelord equivalent of like 18ish here #heaven’s art<3 #no one talk abt my Gallifreyen. just don’t even

[splickedylit]

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Kongo Unsui/Hiruma Youichi/Anezaki Mamori, One-Sided Kongo Agon/Hiruma Youichi, Kongo Agon & Kongo Unsui Characters: Kongo Unsui, Hiruma Youichi, Anezaki Mamori, Kongo Agon, Lots of cameo Enma Fires and Saikyou Wizards throughout, …………………………and Musashi Additional Tags: Post-Canon, Bisexual Awakenings, Emotional Repression, Polyamory, Canon-Typical Quarterback (And Manager) Mindgames, these people can't be normal about shit to save their lives, Dysfunctional Family, Agon and Unsui's Convoluted Brother Emotions, And also. parent situation., College is for figuring out you're not straight OR emotionally okay: the fic, …..Unsui deserves to date two people Agon struck out with simultaneously: the fic, It's not exactly hurt/comfort but, Hurt/Validation, isn't a tag

Summary:

“What,” says Unsui, and is keenly, painfully aware that whatever stoic expression his face might have locked itself into in his shock, his cheeks are damningly warm. One part of his mind demands, do something, his plan is working, you’re losing! The other part says, your first kiss was a cackling bastard of a man, because he thought it would make you more likely to lose to him at football. -- Kongo Unsui gets kissed by a man. He's proud to say his performance as a quarterback doesn't suffer at all, in the…extensive aftermath. Hiruma Youichi makes a move, and then does what he does best, which is scramble like a motherfucker and improvise an offense from scratch. Anezaki Mamori analyzes the situation, and politely intervenes. Kongo Agon has a goddamn crisis.

#Eyeshield 21 #es21 #Kongo Unsui #Hiruma Youichi #Kongo Agon #Anezaki Mamori #although she and Agon haven't made much appearance yet. Many things to come >:Ic #Splickedydrabbles #or is the tag #Splickedywrit #I genuinely don't remember #anyway here is repressed monk-themed football boy finding out he has feelings actually. and those feelings include #y'know like. bisexuality. repressed parental baggage. Football Anger. want to be loved. brotherly drama. normal stuff. #the thing about splickedy is they will look at a dude with massive emotional repression and go 'is anybody gonna crack him open like an egg #and not wait for a response

[crossbackpoke-check]

Substance, Shadow, and Spirit [remixed, abridged] by Tao Yuanming

#liv in the replies #patrice bergeron #boston bruins #brad marchand #do you ever think about how brad marchand said that when bergy retired he would retire or are you capable of normal thought i'm not at all #please say a gratitude for both my sanity& y'all that this poem (which has been saved in my camera roll with the vague idea of using it for #??? ​long) & not one of the poems i had saved for carey for a really long time & remixed & everything with another poem until i found a poem #that absolutely murdered me in cold blood but there is an alternate universe where i did& then had to explain my unhinged thoughts to you. #anyway how are we feeling about bergy retirement. pspspspsp sara & luna are y'all doing okay like. the doc title for this one was #patrice the hockey player means a lot to me but patrice the person means so much more #which is why the end line of the other poem was so *%"@^)! (you love / what you are) because patrice does. like he is a whole ass good huma #& now since no one asked i need to tell you all the details about everything also y'all please clap i made an edit with NO baby pictures #although i did find one & save it & minimal genres of photo i always use in edits because they're my taste & aesthetic but anyway. #when i saved the first photo and marked it as one i wanted i accidentally wrote “how will he know they love him” which is not the line but #makes me feel feral about patrice & the rest of them all had hurtful names too but also. the third picture is literally a CELLY like brad #just scored a goal & he is clinging to bergy for dear life with that shit i saved that as “oh the agony on his face for unendurable” #& yes it is one of my cliches to have a draft day picture but in my defense the lifelong bond that patrice has/d with boston deserved to be #there even if i put in the love story & YES that picture is from the 2011 playoff right below it shared joy & pain & i couldn't tell you #when the brad marchy photo for together forever is except for the fact that i saw it & just the gut punch of oh my god the way he looks at #things men will praise you for is the stanley cup. duh. but i love the contrast of “some deed” being the stanley cup but then #bergy's choice to do noble deeds (ends up still earning praise &that's my note to his efforts outside of hockey we love a supportive captai #should also mention the first two i came up with & had the photos i knew i wanted for were the first and last one alskaldk but i KNEW i #wanted chara somewhere in the paragraph about leaving & then while i was looking found the one of bergy playing tuukka on accident & yes #i do have to make goalie jokes every time. no reprieve . no dice/no deal/no goal goalies have no rest/reprieve etc etc the one that killed #me though was looking for a patrice award pic & i wanted basically the one that i got for “how will you know any will praise you” & instead #also got the picture of patrice winning the some community hero award for charity work that he does & i love him mama & of COURSE that puck #is from bergy's 1000 game who do you think I am (if you guessed sleepy and emotional about patrice you'd be right) and ALSO please be ready #for all the patrice posts/bruins posts that have been sitting in my drafts to be released on this occasion of patrice retirement #I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT TUUKKA ALSO RETIRED THAT’S WHY HE WAS ON WISE OR SIMPLE NO REPRIEVE AND THAT LATE OR SOON WAS ALWAYS GOING TO BE #CHARA BECAUSE CHARA LEFT FIRST TO GO TO THE CAPS AND THEN LEFT IN RETIRMENT HE LEFT SOON BUT NOT FOR REAL THEN LATER LEFT FOR REAL (RETIRED)

[lieutenantselnia]

2 things that have absolutely nothing to do with each other, but are kinda related to this blog, and that have been on my mind recently:

I'd love to make some kind of small custom merch some day, either of just my f/os or actually my self ships. Like stickers or a pin, maybe even a small keychain. Even if it was just for myself (bc idk if anyone else would even be interested in it, especially when it's including not just the canon character but my s/i as well), but I think it would be cute <3

What if I made a Davy x Selena x Maccus crack ship? For no particular reason other than silliness

#just very random thoughts #I want more merch of my darlings anyway so I'll probably just have to make it myself #regarding number 2 idk maybe I just feel bad for having Maccus kinda be a third wheel in their relationship #in my normal story he's kind of their wingman and later on has sort of a family friend/uncle role #but I could imagine that even then he still had a bit of an unrequited crush on Davy #and part of the reason why he didn't like Selena for a while was because he was jealous lol #so although I think in their more serious story Selena and especially Davy are both very monogamous - the shark man deserves love too🦈😭 #ngl the more I think about it the more I actually think the idea would be cute help #f/o: 🐙 #davy jones #self ship #self shipping community #selnia talks

[iridescentoracle]

credit to @jenesaispourquoi for finding the template and saying she wanted it with ML characters, and to her and @nyquildriver for contributing suggestions when i got stuck

#miraculous ladybug #specifically nyquil suggested alix & kim and jenesaispourquoi suggested rose #and they were both so correct on all counts #also the note regarding chat noir is absolutely crucial. like he'll be confused first but what's he actually going to do #*not* follow ladybug's plan? #also yes he's the only one transformed on purpose because that's when he would say that #everyone else would say their line in completely normal life #(although ofc in gabriel & marinette's cases it would immediately precede leaving to transform) #anyway i can't stop thinking about gabriel saying ''cancel my meeting nathalie i have to go kick a baby'' now

[batz]

realizing its almost been 6 months since top surgery:)

#frank.txt #despite all the complications i had w healing im rlly happy w how my chest looks:) #ALTHOUGH. ONE BIG COMPLAINT #i used to use my bras as an extra pocket for my phone or lighter or whatever. but now i dont wear bras and therefore have no extra pocket #:( u win some u lose some :( #anyway all shirts look awesome on me now AND i can wear t shirts w funny text or image ans ppl wont feel awkward reading it:) #also the scars r fading rlly well! they almost blend in w my skin completely! (keyword almost. theyr still visible atp) #the way the scars r shaped is interesting bc theyre like a U shape. but bc of that when i inevitably build my pectoral muscles #the scars should blend into the shadow caused by thr muscle. i also dont have a Completrly flat chest bc im fat:0 #tbh my surgeon did rlly well . i have a lot of problems with him bc hes kind of a dick but from like. idk an artistic standpoint hes good #but the doctor standpoint hes Uhm. well i lost a nipple and had severe infection due to denied antibiotics and lack of aftercare #BUT. the lost nipple isnt visible and it looks normal now somehow AND. i didn't die from the infection so. I mean #i just had to spend christmas with a fever of 103 LMAO #HONESTLY THO i would do it again EVEN if i knew i would go thru hell bc this surgery fuckn saved my life holy shit #i didnt realize just how much i dissociated from my own body bc of dysphoria. now i feel more in touch with it and happy!:) #also now i can Eventually get that chest tattoo i wanted for like 7 years lmao #erm yippee:)

[aquilamage]

I don’t have anywhere to go with it but I’m very compelled by the idea of Vi lying about her age to the explorer’s association

#in a universe where eetl's line about not allowing children is more of an actual Thing #normally I tend to think of her as being 17 but for this she's like sixteen and a half. maybe like three quarters. because its funnier #(and I always think about her looking young for her age but that's extra true in this case. because it's exaggerated with her pretending to #be older) #she uses fake id stuff she got from someone in the underground tavern #also have thoughts on that getting 'revealed' #although one of them is an au where muse is around and the very first time she has a moment alone with vi she's like anyway how drastically #are you lying about your age. deadpan. because they're similar enough that she can just Tell #I suppose leif might also suspect her at some point but it wouldn't be as immediate #(this is more of a separate post thought but sometimes I have feelings about the comparison drawn between them) #(I don't personally vibe with the idea of leif and or kabbu being (like) vi's parent but I do think leif has moments where he looks at vi #and is like. sees in her someone that could be a version of his and muse's kid. and emotional) #but anyway back to the other relevant thought. which is that Vi doesn't bring up the age thing until they get to her birthday #(which. the one on her id may or may not match her real one idk) #and leif or kabbu remarks on her being nineteen oh wow can't believe it. and she's like *awkward inhale* /yeah/..... #an aquila original #bug fables #vi bug fables

[lanshappycorner]

Sometimes I look outside my scope of mutuals and I'm like.....I'm glad I'm not them (whole essay in the tags)

#im going to ramble about a very touchy subject here but it pertains to 🐉♠️ which i am very open about shipping #apparently its Problematic or whatever 😭😭???? according to Some People #you know ive been thinking abt this for a while now but people really like spouting rhetoric abt how this or that is problematic without- #-really considering the specifics of why things are bad. things being bad are not the same as things possibly being uncomfortable #like people have an aversion to adult/minor ships or incest ships because these are real and tangible things that happen and are disgusting #i do feel like people have freedom over what they want to consume/create in fiction although those topics are an ick to me and i avoid it #but also you have to understand people dont like it primarily because of the realistic aspect of it and how it connects to reality #not a one to one but because reality already has these preexisting issues we naturally have an aversion to it #you cannot apply the same logic to like a dragon man x human ship because a dragon man is not going to scoop you from the sky #the ramifications of shipping an immortal and human are nonexistant and do not pertain to reality and cannot be judged on the same scale💀 #well beside from the logic 🐉 is old in body but his mind develops in the way a fae would. and he is described to be young in fae #so up until now i assumed the normal assumption was to say that he is around ~18 in fae yrs by how he interacts with others in his yr #🐉 is like old in the way where hes lived for a long time and understands the passage of time #but hes processed it through the lens of a young person hence why he can come off as immature despite how old he physically is💀 #like are we playing the same game?? if he was a well adjusted fully developed adult with a complete understanding of the world and stuff #like idk trein. none of the events in ch 7 would be happening. its kind of like a huge part of his character that despite his physical age #he IS still learning as he IS still young #i could go into a analysis of his character but thats for another time </33 #anyways i see people . primarily young people. telling their mutuals you can or cant ship this and that #and im like its okay to not like ships if you personally find it uncomfortable but to police ur friends...for ships that arent even 'bad' #its insane to me...how do u live like this? #people really need to start thinking about the nuances and why things are the way they are in regards to fiction #instead of buying into that weird pr*ship/ant*ship thing 😭 ive always hated it its so dumb. my university professors wouldve hated it #theres no nuance like...none. personally i also think its why people have low reading comprehension these days too tbh #life is about looking at various viewpoints and coming up with your own opinion #not 'picking a side'💀 learn to form your own opinions. talk to people around you about it. do not constrict your opinions to black/white #its an extremely dangerous mindset to have even outside of literature and it makes you very susceptible to dangerous ideas/propaganda #anyways what im getting at is learn to have educated discussions with others and come up with your own opinions instead of picking a side #btw there is no right/wrong side in literary discussions. there is no good/bad side either. whatever you come up w someone will disagree #thats why its important to just believe what YOU believe in (and not parrot others💀). and also be open to change

[dykedivorce]

if any other bitch in konoha had been gay apart from sasuke none of this would have happened to my son naruto.

#pussy from the turbotron edgelord 3000 and his whole life went up in flame. NOT worth it #no but fr it's insane how he bamboozled every fan into thinking he was so interesting and cool and badass when . #at the point im at in shippuden hes by far the least interesting of the main characters. one track mind (vengeance) and no depth beyond that #like the other characters rn : sakura coming in to her own ; finding her path and her strength + sharing a connection so deep with naruto #over their common loss that they both just Know although they absolutely cant talk about it #yamato: the only survivor of orochimaru's monstrous experiments on children; kakashi's stand in thats so different from kakashi #it makes you wonder what it would have been like with him as their teacher from the start; #a mystery thats clearly trying his best but whose mission truly is A Lot #SAI: A BRAINWASHED SPY A PAWN FOR A SECRET ORGANISATION WHO CLINGS TO HIS HUMANITY NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES HES BEEN PUNISHED FOR IT #WHO FELL IN LOVE WITH NARUTO FOR MAKING HIM REALIZE HOW DEEP THINGS COULD BE FELT AND HOW DEEP RELATIONSHIPS COULD RUN #WHO HAS BEEN DRAWING A BOOK FOR HIS DEAD BROTHER FOR YEARS EVEN IF HE'S FORGOTTEN WHAT HIS BROTHER LOOKS LIKE #WHO DECIDED TO SPARE SASUKE BECAUSE HE'S LOVED. WHO JUST WANTS TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE A HUMAN LIFE. #MOST AUTISTIC CODED CHARACTER OF ALL TIMES HAS NEVER SUCCESSFULLY MASKED A DAY IN HIS LIFE. #sasuke: sasuke #anyway. im not touching on naruto because i could be here for days #BUT while sasuke on his own so far is very whatever. the narusasu dynamic is truly one for the ages #bc i just saw the ep where sasuke manages to see kyuubi inside naruto and wooshes him away and it's very like. #oh so hes literally seeing naruto's demons and banishing them even as hes telling naruto they dont matter to each other anymore. #oh ok cool cool cool cool this feels normal and not something to obsess over #jesus christ why am i typing all this. who here cares #naruto thoughts

[sailforvalinor]

.

#I just realized that I have not provided an update about the Boy recently #we’ve been talking pretty consistently since the date(?) and that’s been good? #he’s made no romantic overtures or anything which I suppose could be because he’s waiting until I’m not in another country #which is perfectly fine with me #I just don’t know if I like him or not or if he’s just easy to talk to or if I’m trying to delude myself into thinking I like him because I #want a boyfriend or if I’m being really really silly and just need to stop freaking out! #like I prayed about this boy and then he asked me out like I feel like that makes it pretty obvious I should at least see where this goes #but I’m scared 😅 #also did I mention that we became friends as kids because of professor Layton? no joke #I was playing unwound future and he came up and introduced himself and asked what I was playing and we played right up to the end of it #together—and then when I saw him again I didn’t figure he’d remember (I was nine and he was eight) but he ended up going ‘hey you remember #that game we played together as kids? professor Layton? did you hear it’s getting a sequel?’ #like not only did he remember that but he remembered the game BY NAME and even remembered one specific puzzle we were stuck on for ages #(it’s that one elevator puzzle near the end if any of you were curious) #anyway he’s trying to convince me to play hollow knight and I will attempt to oblige (although this is not my normal style of game lol)

[wonder-worker]

It is difficult to argue that [Edward IV] was wrong in what he did. His advancement of [Richard of Gloucester] can be criticized only by those who believe that the only good nobleman is an impotent nobleman. Medieval kings did not think in these terms. Gloucester’s power was valuable because it ensured royal control of a significant and troublesome part of the country. Nor can Edward be blamed for not foreseeing the ends to which Gloucester might put his power. The duke had been a loyal upholder of the house of York, a central figure in Edward’s polity*; there was no obvious reason why he should not occupy the same role under Edward V. In this respect, precedent was on Edward’s side. Previous minorities had seen squabbles over the distribution of power, but no young king had ever been deposed. Even royal uncles traditionally drew a line at that, something which explains why Gloucester’s actions seemed so shocking to contemporaries and, perhaps, the reason why he got away with it so easily in the short term.

In the immediate sense, Gloucester must take final responsibility for what happened in 1483. However one explains the motives behind his actions, things happened because he chose that they should: there is nothing in the previous reign which compelled him to act as he did.

-Rosemary Horrox, "Richard III: A Study of Service"

*Richard was also, yk, Edward's own brother who had been entirely loyal to him during his life. The problem wasn’t that Edward trusted Richard (why wouldn't he?), the problem is that Richard broke that trust in a horrible and unprecedented way to usurp a 12-year-old. Please understand the difference.

#wars of the roses #edward iv #richard iii #edward v #my post #The arguments of Ross and Pollard (et al) are so profoundly unserious and ahistorical #casting an unforeseeable turn of events as a predictable ('structural') one as David Horspool rightly puts it #Ross specifically is entirely dependent on his own horrible view of Elizabeth Woodville and her family as the basis of his analysis #but anyway. as Horrox points out later in the book: #''although earlier events [during Edward's reign] cannot be said to have caused the crisis they did have some bearing in how it developed' #namely Edward's legacy of forfeitures in the 1460s; manipulation of property descents; and fluctuating royal favour. #the most prominent and politically important of all of these were the manipulation of the Mowbray and Howard family fortunes #This is often used to enhance the unserious and ahistorical arguments of historians like Ross and Pollard that Edward doomed his son #But as Horrox points out: Edward's reign did not exist in a vacuum and needs to be analyzed by actual historical context. #from a broader perspective his actions were not especially transgressive as far as English kings were concerned #NO MONARCH (Edward III; Henry VII; etc) died with every single one of their nobles 100% content and supportive #they weren't living in Disney movies and there's no point holding Edward IV to fairytale standards that did not exist. #More importantly Horrox points out that Edward's actions (eg: the Mowbray and Howard cases) need to be put into actual perspective #They were not perceived as problems and did not cause problems during his own reign. #They did not cause problems after he died before Edward V arrived in London. #They only became problems after Richard decided to seize power and deliberately exploited them as bribes for political support #Had Richard decided to support his nephew or work with the Woodvilles - Edward's actions (@ the Mowbrays and Howards) would be irrelevant #(It's also worth pointing out that we don't know WHEN Richard decided to usurp. It if it was a more gradual desire then his depowering #of the Woodvilles by exploiting Mowbray & Howard discontent would not have not affected *Edward V's* ascension or prospects) #ie: the problem isn't that discontent existed with a few specific nobles (that was normal) the problem was how Richard took advantage of it #In theory this sort of thing would have been a potential threat for ANY heir to the throne whether they were a minor or an adult #In itself it's not really unique to Edward and it's silly when historians criticize him and him alone for it. It was more or less standard. #(if anything the fact that he was able to do them so successfully is an indication of his authority) #We come back to Horspool's point: 'Without one overriding factor' - Richard's initiative and actions - 'none of this could have happened.' #which is where this analysis of Horrox's comes in :)