#also idk something something being even more artistic something something

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi,

I am very much not american so I must admit that my first impulse when seeing all the rap/racism discourse was something like "do I really need to consume more american culture, it's fucking everywhere already". Idk but to me it feels like american/english-speaking culture absolutely dominates a lot of the world, sometimes at the cost of out own cultures and languages, if something is in English it is "good", if it is in own own languages it is "bad". Musicians often start singing in English and more american-like after a while to get bigger. We value American culture and music, they mock our accents (and languages sometimes) and best case scenario see us as funny and silly.

Then I started thinking. Do you think that americans kind of see rap kind of like foreign music still? Like low-brow unexotic foreign music.

I don't know this is a really fresh thought and I'm not sure if I am explaining it very well.

hey first off I just want to say -

you are entirely correct in your reaction that people outside of America/the English-speaking world do not need more American culture thrust upon them! this discussion is extremely centered on Americans, the reception and reaction to rap within America, and excuses that white American use to avoid interacting meaningfully with Black culture, art, and ideas. while anti-Blackness as an issue obviously extends far outside of America, this particular conversation is deeply tied to American culture. I appreciate you pointing that out!

I also think you're point about rap, and by extension other Black artforms, being Othered in American pop culture. certainly in terms of language, African American Vernacular English (AAVE), which is utilized by many rappers, is still heavily disputed in its validity as a "real" language, with many dismissing it as a bastardized version of "proper" English and associating it heavily with those who are lower-class and uneducated. in a similar way to many international artists having to work in English to gain wider recognition and validation, many Black Americans are proficient in "code switching," the practice of switching between AAVE that they likely grew up speaking and an English dialect that is considered more "professional."

similarly, I think your use of the term "low-brow" is very apt. Black music has always been met with distrust and disdain by white audiences. there's a reason that so many people feel the need to bring up sex, drugs, and violence when they talk about rap; to many white cultural gatekeepers that was all rap was. (and, like, we should very much talk about why that is in and of itself a bad thing, when white crime is so often glorified in pop culture. why is the Godfather a classic masterpiece but Black men making art about their own experiences with racism, violence, poverty, and survival don't deserve serious consideration?) and that didn't start with rap! in the early 20th century jazz, also a Black creation, was seen as dangerous for promoting promiscuity among nice white teens. no matter what Black people make, white cultural gatekeepers will find a way to start a moral panic about it.

the reverse also happens as well, with Black people being treated as foreigners even in music genres that they helped pioneer. Black Americans were hugely formative in the early days of country, but are met with hostility in the contemporary country scene. Lil Nas X's Old Town Road was one of the biggest songs of the year it was released and undeniably country but was largely snubbed by country music community, and Beyoncé's new country album, Cowboy Carter, is a direct response to her hostile reception at the Country Music Awards in 2016.

the point being, yes, I don't think it's off-base to say that, to many Americans, rap and Black music and art generally are like... very optional and avoidable parts of pop culture in the way that more white-dominated genres are not, similarly to a lot of international and especially non-English art.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Let it Be Close-watch

Paul, sweety, it's beautiful, but it's killing the vibe.

Ringo looks like a very old, very tired lab rat whose been put through the maze a few too many times

Somehow the air-brown mostly eaten apple is very appropriate.

She looks far too sweet here to ever let John down. Yoko has very kind eyes.

I love how it makes it seem like Paul and John are calling Maxwell “the corny one” but really we know from Get Back that they're talking about a particular arrangement they were trying out for Don't Let me Down.

I swear he's saying “John” there, not “Joan” and also he said “came down upon His head” so… Oh! And Max died in the end in this version? “Sure that Max was dead” Okay. So Paul kills John and then himself. Murder suicide story. Yeah, Paul, you're doing great mentally, we can all tell.

I love how George getting electrocuted was important enough to make the cut for both films. Poor baby. “If this boy dies you're gonna cop it” from the guy who was just singing about a serial killer.

They're so silly

Yoko does not agree with me

Paul: stealing your man, sweetheart. John: oh no I'm being stolen teehee!

They're so silly

Oh wait, were those bitchy looks at George??? Because there he is. Idk could easily be him or Yoko.

this poor autistic baby trying to use words (not his language) to explain music (his language)

“Good MoOornin! Wooah!” I think I just … You know how Mike said people were booing Paul in the theater watching this? Yeah it's because they were pissed he didn't step out of the screen and onto their necks.

Oh Michael put himself in his own movie too? Huh, cool.

They are always in my heart

The way Paul says “get on the mic” to John??? I would've thrown something, that was so fucking bossy! Just his tone and his face and his angry pointing fingers. So mean. And John just goes “okaaay”. Oof.

Ringo covering his eyes like a little kid watching a scary movie during the orange sweater fight. Same, babe.

Sounds like the original lyric John's going for is something long “All I want is you. Nothing else is gonna do.” But that obviously didn't fit with the tune. I wonder if there was a particular conversation with Paul being controlling that made the “everything has got to be the way you want it to” line click in.

Oh my gosh! So George is showing I Me Mine to Ringo and Paul and he says the “I don't give a fuck it can go in musical” line before he even plays it. Not after John's making fun of him like he does in Get Back. Nagra reels experts: which one is correct??

George: it's a heavy waltz. Ringo:*claps hands angrily and punches the air to a ¾ beat. I love him, he's like the core of “Beatle humor” to me.

Woah there! Okay this is the John/Yoko pda Peter Jackson cut, I see. I wonder if there's a lot more footage of them swapping spit that might make the “oh John was just so in love” theory more reasonable.

It's extremely impressive that George just wrote this whole thing last night. You know? John and Paul have brought in all fragments from what I can tell. He's the only one to come in with a basically finished product.

LMAO and we're just going to Apple now. No reason. Nothing happened. Nothing to see. Moving on.

Ringo is so so cute pretending to hide from the cameras. Really he should've been the cute one.

Is it just me or does Paul drop the sillies and get sad when he sings “always be mine” at John? It's his regular voice, too, for a minute, if I'm not mistaken.

Silly cuties. But John's grin and little sexy tongue action happens the second time Paul sings always be mine, so…

What friendly artistic collaboration looks like when it's not psychosexual

Paul: have you played the dubs? George: yeah. Terrible. Paul: Great! Ringo: terrible. John: laughs Paul: (sarcastic) oh, so dreadful. …. John: where's my guitar? Paul: (still sarcastic) well we're just the greatest band ever. Idk I just like this dialogue. It's very them, you know?

This is adorable.

But I also love how they're already communicating with eyebrows, you know? They just bonded so fast and I find that beautiful.

And then Heather ups their game from taking turns going “chchchchch” into the mic to meowing into the mic. She looks at Paul like “okay your turn” and he sets her down lol he's thinking ‘if I meow into the mic right now after John already had a sex dream last night about me, he might actually cream his pants and we can't have that on camera’

Lol Billy just magically appeared!

Paul you're literally so annoying. You started the goofing off and now you're like “alright lads, that's enough.” Mkay.

He is unbelievably sexy and talented though so you know he does have those little things going for him. Someone write me a Paul/Billy fic please!!

Kinda crazy how they all four just slide straight from “Kansas City” to “Miss Ann” to “Lawdy Miss Claudy”. Makes me think of something they might've done in Hamburg.

I'm sorry but Paul finishes “please don't excite me baby. I'm down in misery.” And John's immediate answer is, “well you can get it if you want it, and if you want it you can get it!” And Paul ends up singing “I want it I want it I want it I want it”. Nice. Very subtle, boys. And that's before John gets kinky.

I love how Heather just forces a hug from George and then immediately runs away. What a cutie.

But really. How did anyone watching this get the idea that John hated Paul? Just confirmation bias I guess?

All the cut off conversations kill me but especially the one where John's working though Paul's anxieties. They're just in the middle of it and then cut. “two of us Sunday driving…”

Someone should do a study of whistling in their songs. I feel like it's another one of their tip offs that “hey this one is about us” Anyway I love John's whistling here. He's so good at it. I can just imagine him as some farm boy picking apples, you know?

Imagine booing this poor stay puppy though, like. What? I mean, what if Johann Weiner was wrong and John wasn't crying at the sight of him and Paul playing triumphant together on the rooftop, but at Paul playing his little heart out about their doomed love. Idk it's probably both. Let's be real, John was bawling through the whole thing.

What is George laughing at? Picture quality is garbage because evil corporations don't let you take screenshots of their content, but he looks like that one kid in your elementary school class that just dumped Cheetos all over his crushes desk and thinks he's a criminal mastermind.

Also I do appreciate all the attention given in the chosen shots to the musicianship. I bet they liked that at least if they had the heart to like anything about the movie at the time.

I'm sorry but I love how in sync Mo and Paul are. With this ducking and later the shimmying. I know it's wrong to ship Ringo’s wife with one of the Beatles she didn't sleep with, but… idk I really want her to have bedded all four at one point, you know? She deserves it, being an og.

Okay but yeah I'd be having a public meltdown if I fumbled that too holy fucking shit

Ringo feeling himself as he should

George just looks like he smells nice. Unlike the others. You know?

John has such a beautiful smile. If somebody looked at me like that I'd put him up on a giant screen behind me on my world tour after he'd been dead for forty years too.

That pleeeaaaheeeaaase though. Looking at Paul. How did he survive I'll never know.

The cut from screaming Paul to grouchy nap lady is extremely painful.

John was so cool in this concert. Like the epitome of cool.

Kevin, my love, thank you for your service

I love Yoko leaning so far and craning her neck. She's like a mom at a school talent show. Like “I only came to see my baby.” Type vibe. Which is exactly what she's doing, unlike Mo, and honestly I find both of them extremely valid

You know in movies where the romantic leads are never looking at each other at the same time?

I think I watched George and John switching back on their amps like fifty times because I just love it so much. And from this angle, you can see John's saying something to Paul about it. He looks serious and he's shaking his head. I wonder what he's saying.

Mal Evans I love you forever for this. Look at his hand on the rail, just blocking them off completely, so protective.

Them turning to each other at the end always gets me. It's automatic, like second nature, and it's the last time ever. They deserved better.

Oh Darling duet in the credits are you fucking kidding me??? Was that in the original? “Believe me, when I tell you.” “Oh I do.” That's the second time that they gave away in this footage that they know they're talking to each other in their music.

Alright, that's it, I guess. And then MLH is haunted by this experience for forty years until he makes Two of Us to purge the demons.

#paul mccartney #the beatles #john lennon #mclennon #ringo starr #george harrison #let it be

[matan4il]

Hey!! Idk if you are watching Eurovision or if you are but still are a bit behind but when you end/see the final results, were you expecting Israel to end up where it ended up or?

Hi Nonnie!

I absolutely watched, gotta cheer for Eden, after all she had been through! It wasn't easy, we had a rocket attack by Hamas at Israel during the show, while people who have never had to run into a bomb shelter for their lives booed in the venue at Israel getting as little as 3 points here or there, from a random jury.

I think Croatia deserved to win, I didn't expect us to, and TBH, with the financial crisis Israel is currently going through due to the war, I might not want us to, because it costs a lot to host.

But Israel making it to second place in the public's vote? Wow. WOW. What a statement. The judges in the juries have to put their names to their vote, and with the hatred that some protesters have spilled at anything Israel related, to the point of people personally threatened, I'm not that surprised that we didn't get more during that part of the show. But where people aren't being personally threatened? All these countries showed that Israel isn't as much of a pariah as some violent protesters would like you to believe, and that sane people understand what Israel is going through.

Israel also beat in the public vote every one of the awful "artists" that had no qualms about being disgusting to a 20 years old girl, who is representing her people, as if she's guilty of what they think about her government. Considering that it could have easily been them, targeted because of something their government was doing, the complete lack of empathy and basic human decency, or even just understanding for a fellow performer was beyond vile. So yeah, I'm glad Eden got more points than Switzerland, Ireland, Portugal, Greece and the UK. These, together with the Dutch singer (who got himself disqualified) were the worst offenders, constantly harassing and humiliating Eden and others in the Israeli delegation. MUCH LOVE to the people in those countries that were better than their representatives, and to those in every country that voted for Eden, showing compassion and an actual endorsement of humaneness.

Did I expect it? I had hopes the public would be kinder than expected, but yeah, I didn't think we'd get a second place among viewers. And enough points from juries to get to 5th place overall, too? It was incredible, and it felt like a win. I'm very proud of all those voters, of the jury judges who dared to put "Israel" next to their names, and of the Israeli team (they said that all that hate just made them want to be even more professional about the whole thing).

Am Yisrael chai! We're alive, kicking, and in our way, even winning!

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

#israel #antisemitism #israeli #israel news #israel under attack #israel under fire #anti terrorism #antisemitic #antisemites #jews #jew #judaism #jumblr #frumblr #jewish #terrorism #hamas #ask #anon ask #eurovision

[jademight]

Kinda wanna take up poetry / prose-y writing

#;ooc tag #I wrote a piece for my voice project that I performed today and. I forgot how much I love writing about myself and my emotions actually #like I love writing roleplaying but when I get to go FULL prose-y and flowery I just. gah. #I really adore the piece I wrote lmfao if anyone wants to see it just lmk I love being vain #like roleplaying can be mentally taxing but writing in other contexts is just. [vague gestures] Ya kno? #also idk something something being even more artistic something something

[pixelatedraindrops]

Mm I think I'm slightly into makoyuma/yumako.

But I like them platonically. I just love them together in general.

As brothers or friends idc they are the duo ever.

They make me happy 💜

#pixel txt. #rain code #rain code spoilers #yuma kokohead #makoto kagutsuchi #makoyuma #yumako #they are really cute okay?? #the silliest sillies of all time #im too ace for romance shipping #I enjoy their dynamic potential even more than the NDA #like nah thats his found family to me I like them that way <3 #but makoto? idk I feel like these two could be...something lmao #plus both of them being my whumpees since they are essentially the same delicate little rain soaked napkin I have my bias ;w; #I see them more as 'selfcare' then 'selfcest' #either way I love them and need more of them in my life #they're both comfort characters to me <3 #ALSO PLEASE SUPPORT THE ARTIST OF THE GIF IT IS NOT MINE

[toytulini]

the challenge of i should commission art of my ocs. would love to commission like, siiyr or bokrae, maybe krachyn or jula. siiyr or bokrae would make the most sense, maybe krachyn. i think theyre the ones with the most detailed notes on their anatomy

but also

oh god i cannot subject another artist to the anatomical war crimes i committed in making these ocs

#toy txt post #ig id be best off commissioning someone w a lot experience w like. centaurs. let alone commisioning them actually doing anything #interesting. the good bad news is ai cant do it either. fucking i cant even do it. why did i make these bitches. i gave bokrae a gf #but shes not. she cant even. her lips dont really do a kiss shape shes all teeth #siiyr has too many fucking elbows and a weird skull situation #bokraes skull continues to break my brain. i think it does break physics in universe. birdie did weird shit w that eye #its constantly trying to explode #the art ideas i have for bokrae and siiyr have plagued me for years even now in my depression funk of no new ideas #i cant bring myself to subject other artists to them????? #i should specify Bokrae's teeth more tho probably. i used to jokingly explain it away as she has all the teeth/they change #and. they do. canonically birdie has to replace all of her bones over time especially her skull. but also #that was me being lazyyyyyyyyyyyy #idk i know you dont necessarily need like a super detailed ref sheet to commission things but like. if i was commissioning my own ocs id #want that probably? #maybe i will try to draw the girls today. probably not doing anything interesting #bc i have not drawn for One Billion Years and im out of practice with Normal Human Anatomy let alone #these fucking Monsters #also maybe one day ill figure out Jared #pigeon head on a deaths head moth body with gemstone eyes is something i can see in my head but when i try to draw it it doesnt look right #so. need to work on that? the main thing about jared is that he needs to Scuttle #and id like to incorporate a pigeon #hm #hmmmmmmm

[hwanswerland]

at the rate this is going I'm seriously debating not even going to the tour

#fio.txt #there's not even europe dates yet obviously but im so done #just the tour? i would have side eyed #but the tour AND A COMEBACK THE MONTH BEFORE #nah #i feel like im turning into a lil hater here and i dont even want that but the concept pics for the cb feel so...uninspired #idk golden hour sounds pretty epic but the pics are pretty bland and boring to me #do something cool and artistic for gods sake take some time to actually get behind a concept then give them time TO PROMOTE AND THEN REST!!! #!!!!!!!!!!!! #and then and THEN you may have them tour again #literally 2026 usa tour would have been more than enough theyve been on tour every single year the past three (four with 2025 ig) and that #is not fucking sustainable #im gonna be really honest here #this ongoing situation with them is a big part of why i was highly kpop critical before i got into it #bc all i had heard was that the idols are pretty much just obects to be marketed and worked to burnout to get the most money possible #out of them #being kind of dehumanised and instead turned into content to be consumed #like they as persons and whatever artistic vision and passions and dreams they might have are secondary to capitalist greed #and that makes me so so sad and also frustrated and i want to rage and throw a few bricks through kq ents windows

[mumblesplash]

getting better at drawing when you’re not trying for realism is kinda funny bc it’s like wow now my art looks even MORE like the exact midpoint between old-school disney and late 2010s anime. i didn’t think it was possible and yet i’ve done it again. inspiring

#and soon? even More. #there’s also the additional layer of not being able to explain what about my art is better than it used to be #like idk what to tell u it’s just better now. all my old stuff is crap compared to this. leaps and bounds #source: dude trust me #tbh i think my artistic abilities probably seem much more consistent from an outside pov #bc i never want to draw anything i can’t draw #like if i TRIED to draw that cuteguy stoplight drawing a few months ago it would have looked terrible #but i wouldn’t have tried bc i wouldn’t have wanted to bc i couldn’t you see #that’s the thing about art it never feels any easier #if you start out frustrated by your skill falling short of your vision guess what #your vision will continue to improve as you gain skill and that frustration never goes away #but it also never feels any harder #my first experience with drawing was being pleasantly surprised to find my skill slightly exceeded my aspirations #(i was 3 and my aspirations were draw a duck) #and you know what. to this day the pleasant surprise remains #what i’m saying is dream small stay in your comfort zone and do not strive for great things #cannot recommend complacency enough #this isn’t sports you don’t get gains through effort you get gains and then the effort happens on accident #don’t listen to me i probably don’t know what i’m talking about #but i AM having more fun drawing than you so maybe i’m onto something #impossible to say #i’m certainly not smart enough to figure that out i’m an idiot have you seen the kind of advice i give #mumbling

[jrueships]

tbh tho i think my art is fugly af LMFAO

#not in a '>w< eeeek! i wish i could drawww 🥺 i can only cobble such measle crap with my lowly peasant paws.. *unveils mona lisa*' #sense but like a my style makes me want to hurl whenever i look at it bcs it's a constant reminder that it can only be what i can make it be #and bcs it looks bad to me then that means i cant make things look good if u get my sense like #idk man 😭!! im just sick of being scribbly!! and not clean! i wanna ink my art! have crisp lines! dark lines!! #not have to put stupid darkening filters on everything bcs i cant color or shade so my art is just stuck with the blinding white background #well the frustration is more how i CAN color and shade.. i CAN ink my lines with a darker one #lets not excuse my laziness now cmon ted omg dumbass bitch #it's just that doing so makes me . crazy #my attention span like. crumbles when i try to add color or ink over lines bcs thats Such a commitment to me #i HATE leaving things unfinished when it seems so monumental #like unfinished sketches or prompts? fine. those are sketches. little prompts. even if u post it it's shit #but starting big things is a COMMITMENT.. with CONSEQUENCES ! ! i just want to avoid them ig #it's like im stuck between art being a fun lil past time and being a perfectionist actually so no. no it is not #but also i NEED to draw i NEED to write SOMETHING! SOMETHING!! then i realize the weight of things and purposefully hinder myself #then later hate myself for hindering even tho it felt so good and right in the beginning ORGHH or WHATEVER #idk one of my friends told me my style reminded them of the new tmnt movie (which has been praised yeah #for like beautiful ugliness tho) and like. i KNOW it's a compliment... but. why did it make me Feel 😭 like i wanted to rip my art 2 shreds #once i lined my art and my friend (an artist i admire) said smthin like 'omg finally! ted lined art! gorgeous!' #& i KNOW. I KNOW IT'S A COMPLIMENT. BUT WHY AM I THINKING LIKE. SO VIOLENT. NOT ABT THEM. BUT MY SHIT NOW #like UGHHH i just HATE feeling trapped and helpless when actually theres help available but im just DUM!! JUST LINE UR ART TED #art is like playing sport is like making good grades is like working well is like being a good friend is like being a good person #literally. just be GOOD. #it's all a performance to me ARGHARGH! I HATE THE JOKER! I HATE BEING CRINGE@! RAGGHH I HATE THIS SHIT #<- mfs when no basketball #mfw i cannot avoid enlightenment via the meaningless distractions i codepently craveRAGGHG!!!!!!1!

[the-judicial-assistants-notebook]

y'know, I've been seeing a lot more posts talking about how fanfic, specifically, puts characters into boxes and takes away the nuance of them, and while I think that's an important discussion to have, I also find it quite perplexing? Like, these posts seem to come from people who don't even, or maybe very rarely, consume fics in the first place, and I say that because, if you do consume fics semi-regularly, you kind of learn? how to gage what the stories and characterisation are going to be like based on the tags and summary? Sometimes, you do have to step into the fic to figure it out, but it hardly takes very long to realise if it gels with you or not. Idk, it's not anything serious or important, but it does give me... "girl, what were you doing at the devil's sacrament" vibes, you know?

#this gets posted here because my main has mutuals (whom i still love v much) who are part of the girls suspiciously at the sacrament #fanfiction #ao3 #i feel like the post doesnt properly address what i mean. i understand that these posts arent talking about fics exactly but rather how #mischaracterisation in fics permeates into how characters are portrayed in the fandom at large but even then it's a bit. like i dont think #you can put that all on the fics/writers (and these posts usually do) alone?? like yes the mischaracterisation is more prominent in fics #by virtue of their medium but if it's resonating with artists and other creators then that's clearly indicative of a general #cognisance issue in the fandom??? and like. maybe it's because tumblr is the only socmed site i use but i dont find it difficult to curate #my fandom experience. people generally know how to use tags and while the sudden influx of x reader stuff for every single character isnt #something im fond of either they're generally good at tagging their stuff. it's annoying but you can blacklist that. you can. #also fic isnt like art where you look at it and you've seen it. you have to engage with a fic to understand so then it /really/ feels like #girl what were you doing at the devil's sacrament to me. idk this post isnt complaining about fandom mischaracterisation in general #i complain about that all the time but more so the inclination to put it on fics & their writers. because if you know how to move through #fic spaces and read the summaries and tags #you can generally find works that are really really good. could you argue they're rare? sure. but saying all fics propogate #mischaracterisation is just... a lie? #this got so long. im not even really bothered or annoyed by it im just confused #these are also often the people who espouse rhetoric about being unafraid to post cringe and embracing your weirdness #and it's like. okay do you want people to post unabashedly or do you want them to shut up. #anyway. back to our regularly scheduled programme now

[keirametzbrassknuckles]

I do think it's funny though that writing isn't really thought of as something that has "sketches" or "warmups". You're either writing a completely fleshed out original story or you're failing at being a writer.

#i have so many thoughts about this actually but its 1am and i need to be up at 7 and ive had a few beers and i am not able to adress them #atm #something something the push for fic to be recognized as a legitimate form of the craft #when even at its most in depth and diligent its basically a sketch #and sometimes its just original fiction with a crutch #which is almost worse #tracing and borrowing gesture is how visual artists learn to model the figures they want #copying and living into those same gestures is how writers learn to write #and idk why that isnt acknowledged or respected #visual arts students have for years suffered through being made to copy ~The Canon~ #and like...isn't that what fic is? just sub blorbo from my shows for Girl With A Pearl Earring #but also i think looking at fic as anything more than either a copy or a practice is a disservice in both directions: #to the fic and to you as the author #idk...

[cathymee]

man why is mskm not biting as i thought it would be....

#like it's too early for the ✨emotional✨ stuff we don't even know these people #first scene of the main leads and the romantic undertone's already being forced with the theme song like :')) there's nothing..romantic- #about what happened..... #girlie almost got killed by the thief 😭😭 i think it would do better just being a comedic action scene #i feel like this show would rely more on their artists & the 'nostalgia' factor bc this *was* based on an old movie #which i wish wouldn't be the case...the main leads give off the klay and fidel dynamic already like they're expecting us to feel some sort- #of connection between them already #sorry this sounds so judgey shsgsjsgs idk there's something off about the pilot episode for me already #the scene w/her mother also didn't do it for me like. what was that 💀 #i don't think i'm articulating my points well but i jus 😭😭 what is going onnn #i'm still gonna watch the whole thing tho shdgjs see if i could hold onto this #rambles

[arklay]

have a diana comm in progress again 🥰

#leah.txt #the way i am so so like. frugal? i just cannot spend money it makes me so nervous and panicky (i'm normal i swear) but diana has really #made me go hi i'm allowed to have a lil treat with the money i got from crimas... i deserve this... #that being said i really really do want to learn to draw because i have so many ideas but i also just feel like it would be such a good #like outlet for me if i just like knew basics already idk how to explain it but writing i need A Lot of like just idk so much mental energy #and i have anxiety around wording and things like that and if i'm saying too much cause i know my word counts might be a lot for some #people even though i don't mind them but idk i don't know but with drawing like i feel i would just like feel more free there of like ofc #my fatigue would still kick my ass but like i could do sketches or doodles or something at least that i could go back to?? but alas leah #has lots of joint pain in their hands and lacks depth perception and coordination so mmmm #anyways diana comm on the way and i'm v excited cause i love this artist's art style sooo much and i'm curious how diana will look hehe #conversion rates killed me though so it will be a while until i can get another but other artist who is now good moot of mine that i want #to comm her comms aren't open at the moment so one day she will have to deal with me and my horrible explanations ajfjdjdsk

[sanchoyo]

ik i said i wanted to do at least 2-3 personal solo zines this year aside from the one i already put out but im having such a hard time deciding on a topic?? 'random art zine' or 'sketchbook zine' feel too random kadhfkj. and the only thing ive been MEGA into lately have been my own ocs but making a zine with them would feel weird..also very niche lmao

#also i really dont like the idea of putting my silly oc stuff behind paywalls if im being real ajsdkf theyre goobers free to the world #if i didnt need money i wouldnt even consider any of the zines being paid zines #id just make em all free forever bc i rly do just enjoy sharing stuff like that #but alas...the horrors (being poor + severely mentally ill so i need money sometimes for things) agh... #everytime i sell stuff or make some money with comms something happens like i need to buy pet stuff (food or litter or my dogs expensive #flea pills but they NEED those bc ticks and fleas here in the summer are actually SO bad he needs the vet grade tablets to handle them) #so basically my debt isnt necessary getting too much worse which is good! but its also not..improving bc i keep havin to buy necessities #im not buying anything crazy or nyhting just absolute must haves yk..and yet #oh well at least ppl buying the clothes means ill free up a lort of space if nothing else like even if theres no actual..profit HSDKF #theres two boxes worth of clothes haha...it makes me happy to think ppl will wear them tho since im not anymore #ive been very unhappy w my own clothes augh :( i want to be happy wearing things but idk. idk. nothing i have is sparking enough joy lately #ive bene living in pjs...going to public places in pjs... #very out of character for me but god lol my brain lately #i got some more books at the libraby today when i was picking my nephew up tho :) so that made me happy #theyre all art related !! so mostly pictures + artists talking abt their techniques #all landscape related bc i wanna do more complex painted bgs this year and dip my toes into traditional art a lot more. my sister is #actually a great painter so maybe ill ask her for pointers. but then again thats kinda embarrassing so maybe not #sanchoyorambles #BASICALLY YES MORE ZINES ARE MTH I WANT TO DO BUT IDEAS. NOT WORKING RN

[poptartmochi]

breeze wiki coming out of left field and flipping the table on the gioiaverse 🤪🍻

#sriracha.txt #long post #finally installed the breezewiki extension so it yeeted my ass outta the fandom wiki #and over to the breeze one.. idk if the fandom wiki notes the different spots the prima guide contradicts the devs/artists/game itself but #something about reading about the contradictions on the breeze wiki made me go. hm. yeah. maybe i Will change my mind on this previously #load-bearing aspect of her lore... i think the era of devil-arm-from-birth nero has come to an end :] #it's kinda funny bc y'all remember when i was in SUCH distress over this last time and almost scrapped gioia entirely bc of it... how times #change a man <3 #Anyhow I think i'm more receptive to it this time because her character for the overarching fortuna arc evolved past Paranoid Mother #from very early on she ran a restaurant and that has always been part of her character but. idk Gioia the Restaurant Owner and Gioia the #Mother have always been two kind of separate entities for me until recently #to bring them back together i think it's crucial that gioia is able to be the former without being haunted by the latter.. if she's busy #working what is nero doing? who's looking after him? if he's being watched.. how does he Not run into any incident over the course of 19 #years in which somebody sees the devil arm? even if you live super cautiously i don't think is something that could realistically be #achieved. and it's easier if it's not something on the table at all. #so this is argument numero uno but argument numero DOS is soooo. rips the hair out. i only realized it as i was talking to my sister about #it but. considering gioia's fear and paranoia with the order partially stems from them branding her without informing her abt anything with #the intent purpose of putting her through a ritual that she Also Knew Nothing About until she was exposed to the consequences of directly #(thus becoming a firsthand witness to the secrecy and deceits of sanctus) and bearing that brand + all of its weight and implication #Forever.... i think it is almost more flavorful for nero to suddenly and unexpectedly gain the devil arm in the field.. gioia has a #Instantaneous Washing Machine experience bc on one hand there is the paralyzing fear that the order has done to your son what they forgot t #do to you and now he will be eaten away at from the inside out before dying some fucked up and evil death. and maybe you'll have to kill hi #yourself! agony! on the other hand (haha) you must remember his father was literally capable of becoming a full on demon so. maybe this is #just your son's way of expressing that same ability. crisis averted.. maybe? #i like to imagine it's a constant pingpong in her brain as she fillets fish lol </3 BUT it makes the end of 4 more potent in my head #because it's like... you thought your worst fear was the worst possible outcome for your son + something that always followed you whilst #raising him. something that grows heavier once he walks into the life you abandoned. BUT THEN..... the reality of what almost happened is #infinitely worse.. forget about your son being lost to the Blood Plague he was almost lost to the fucking eschatron lol! as were you....... #yikes! #i think she makes dante and co. a very nice pizza for their part in Avoiding That 😝

[ravensking]

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#i have been going through the worst artists block for the past year or so #like everything i try to make just fails #and its killing me i feel so out of touch with myself #i thought it would get better when i started working part time idk #it feels worse almost #im so uninspired #and i wish seeing other peoples stuff inspired me more but honestly most of the time it makes me feel even more hopeless #i want to be as good as them i just have to keep fucking practicing #im going to michaels tomorrow if that doesnt get me riled up to make something actually cool then idk what the fuck will #its like one out of every 10 looks i do that im even halfway happy with. and i dont even have the willpower to try often as i should #perfectionism ruins my artistic instincts i need to do a psychedelic STAT #also like this isnt actually that big of a prob my life is truly beautiful and i love being alive fr #i just miss the feeling of creating a look I loved several times a week. like have i literally peaked.... #anyways if u read all of this WHO are u i think thats so amazing i feel like im shouting into a void when i do this #tala talks