#also i know you sent this a thousand years ago im sorry!!

[astrangerlately]

Hi idk if you take requests but IF you do could I please ask for more Julien Baker? Maybe Relative Fiction Hardline or Repeat? I hope that’s okay to ask I love your blog and I love Julien & her lyrics!!! ❤️❤️

thank you for your lovely message and of course it's okto ask!!

i don't 'officially' take requests because i'm a disaster when it comes to replying/doing anything in a timely manner, so i just avoid making firm commitments at all lol. as well sometimes i just can't get an idea to work bc im still learning photoshop and id feel really bad if id promised someone a specific lyric edit. so i prefer to not make any promises so no one is disappointed

but tbh you (and everyone!) are welcome to send requests and ill try my best to do something! honestly itd actually be kinda helpful because sometimes i find myself listening to like...the same song over and over again for weeks and so my brain just forgets that other artists exist. like youre so right i love julien baker too but id just never noticed i wasnt making edits of her.

tldr: youre so right and im a hater for not having made julien edits before. i have them all lined up in my queue (didn't want to spam them all at once lol) so hopefully they fit the bill <3

#anon #answered #also i know you sent this a thousand years ago im sorry!! #hopefully your grandkids will enjoy the edits at least

[its-a-ittle-bit-cold]

Piece by Piece

1.8k

Mitchell!reader x dad!Maverick

series masterlist

my masterlist

a/n: I know, I know. Im starting a new series even though i haven’t finished by hunger games one, my clone wars one or my marauders one. I also have marvel series i started on ao3 that i haven’t updated in literally years.. and don’t even get me started on ted lasso.

I guess inspiration just strikes when it strikes.

anyway, here’s the fic

summary: Arrival to North Island means visiting the nearby Navy Bar, the Hard Deck, which is run by your dear friend Penny Benjamin. Of course, you’re not the only visitor that night.

warnings: verbal abuse, drinking, character death, trauma, unedited

It’s strange, how in just a few hours, your whole life can totally and completely change. In just a few minutes, the strangest things can happen - the worst and the best.

In the span of five minutes, you solidified your top spot in the top gun academy. 

In the span of two, you ruined your relationship with your mom.

In the span of one minute and thirty seconds, Your best friend died because of a choice you made.

And within five minutes of that incident, you weren’t too far behind. 

In one minute, sifting through a box your stepfather sent you, you find a picture you’ve never seen before: Your mother, wearing a smile you’ve never seen on her face before, wrapped in the arms of a handsome navy pilot, all teeth and jawbone and eyebrows. 

And with thirty seconds of your arrival at the Hard Deck, that very same pilot comes waltzing in. 

Penny pauses her conversation with you, about how you’ve been, what you’ve been up to, how sorry she is for you, and strikes up a very similar conversation with him.

They have history, you can tell. 

Penny taps the counter over the barstool next to you - one of the only ones available in the crowded bar.

It only takes his polite smile to cement it in your head that this is him. 

This is your father. 

You don’t let anything show through, though. You stir up your shirley temple and smile, introducing yourself as majesty. 

“Ah. I’m in the Navy, too, you know. I’ve never met a Majesty before, though.” 

“Well, sir, this is a Navy bar… and I was on leave up until just recently. It doesn’t surprise me that you haven’t heard of me, since I was stationed in the Peninsula before , and everything there is pretty hush, hush.”

“Maverick,” he says, smiling again, but genuinely. He holds out his hand and you shake it. “Pleasure to meet you, Majesty.”

“likewise, sir. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I finally see someone I know.” 

You bounce off, holding your drink tightly, acting as if your whole life hasn’t just been shaken up by a chance encounter at one of the many Navy bars in North Island. 

Approaching the group of other lieutenants, you steal a glance back at him grinning at Penny with the same stupid lovestruck expression that you saw in the photo.

Yep. That’s him. 

Maverick watches Majesty’s retreating form before she disappears in a group of rowdy pilots, wondering where he’s heard that name before. Majesty. 

He vaguely remembers some news from the peninsula about a year ago, but as the lieutenant had said, the news from there is very limited and very filtered. Something about a pilot whose call sign was Duchess…

“Uh oh.” Penny’s deadpan voice interrupts his thoughts. “You’re thinking. That’s never good.”

She slides him his beer and he laughs softly at her joke. 

“You know that pilot- Majesty - well?”

Penny glances over to where she disappeared into the group of pilots. She’s laughing along with the group while playing pool. They watched her take a shot.

The first thing he thinks is, she sucks.

“Yeah.. She’s a nice girl.” Penny starts deftly making a drink with the confidence of someone who’s done it a thousand times. “She watched Amelia for me when we were going through a divorce. Truly a lifesaver for both of us.” Penny meets his eyes. “She’s had a hard life, that one, and she’s not really ever had a reprieve from it, either. It’s good to see her laughing again.”

He sighs, knowing there’s a lot of pilots who joined up to get away from difficult families. 

He’s so caught up in his thoughts that he doesn’t recognize Bradley Bradshaw himself walking in until he walks up to Majesty and plants a kiss on her cheek,

He raises a hand.

“Penny, check, please?”

You’re having a surprisingly fun time at the Hard deck. You haven’t been clubbing since before you were deployed, and certainly not to a bar.

Who would you go with?

but the pilots you’ve met - and the old friends you’re seeing again are nothing but kind. (at least, to you. It’s been five minutes and Rooster and Hangman are already going at it) 

Phoenix introduces you to the pilots you don’t know, but there aren’t many. You swim in the same circles as most of them.

You line up a pool shot and slide the stick quickly, aiming the white ball at a general cluster of colored balls, and missing all of them completely.

“Now that,” a cocky voice begins over your left shoulder, “That was an astoundingly awful shot, your highness.”

You turn to face Hangman, who’s significantly taller than you, but you still stare right into his eyes. 

“I’ve never played before,” you defend. “And it’s Majesty.”

“Sure it is, darlin’. Lemme show you how to shoot pool.”

You cross your arms.

“Are you going to mansplain eight ball to her, Bagman?” Natasha- Phoenix - juts in. 

“Yeah, are you?” You ask, voice intentionally provocative, meant to make him splutter. Frustratingly, he doesn’t, only coolly lines up a shot - making it perfectly. 

“No, I’m offering to explain how to play properly, so it’s more fun for the both of us.”

You can hear the smirk in his voice. 

Before you can respond with another teasing comment, the music shuts off, making way for a loud, unhappy groan from almost everybody in the bar.

You hear the familiar intro to Rooster’s favorite song, (It’s the only one he learned how to play) and hand the stick off to Bob, whose wide eyes widen even further.

“That’s my cue to leave,” You announce to the group. “I can’t listen to this song for the fifty-thousandth time.”

You blow a kiss to Phoenix and wave to the rest of the pilots, hugging Fanboy, a close friend of yours, and bid adieu to Penny, slipping her a twenty.

“Thanks Penny. See you later, yeah?”

Penny winks at you and waves. You lean into the door and press out into the cool night air, the sound of the ocean suddenly the only sound you can hear - besides Rooster’s muffled voice and piano playing. 

You walk around the bar, getting ready to head back to base. The last thing you expect is to meet eyes with Maverick, who looks like he’s seen a ghost.

“Sir? Are you okay?”

Your voice startles him out of his daze. He shakes his head slightly. 

“Yeah. I’m good.”

His eyes drift to Rooster again through the window, a peculiar expression passing over his face.

“…Well, I’m headed back to base. Have a good night, sir.”

You turn around, hands in your pockets, beginning the short walk back to the barracks.

“Wait. Do you mind if I join you?”

You shake your head ‘no’ and stop to wait for him to catch up with you. How strange is this, the man you just realized was tour father walking with you back to the barracks. 

You walk down the beach in silence, watching the waves crash on shore. There’s not much to say. 

“Are you here for the mission?” he asks eventually, finally, one of you breaking the silence. 

“I.. actually don’t know, sir. They didn’t tell us anything but the fact that we had to be in class tomorrow.”

You meet his eyes, briefly analyzing his face before turning your gaze back to your boots in the sand. There are some features, you suppose, that are similar in your faces. little things, but if he’s your father, you definitely take after your mother. 

“So.. yes. Then you must be a damn good pilot. Penny seems to think so.”

You laugh.

“Penny has what I like to call ‘Mom goggles.’  She thinks everything I do is the greatest thing ever.” 

It’s his turn to laugh.

“‘Mom goggles’? I’ve never heard of that.”

“Well, you’re not married. Give it time and you’ll figure it out.”

Maverick puts his hands up.

“Hang on. How’d you know I’m not married?”

You gesture to his hand. 

“No ring on your finger. And by the way you were shamelessly flirting with Penny literally all night.”

“I was not!”

You shake your head, laughing to yourself. 

This could’ve been us.

you clear your throat, looking out over the sea. The sun has fully set, now, and you’re getting close to base. You yawn, covering your mouth. 

You turn up the path to the base, in a comfortable silence when the your phone rings. You fumble through your pants, unzipping the pocket where you’ve stashed you phone. It reads one word, one you’ve been dreading. 

Mom.

 You cast Maverick an apologetic glance and then take the phone  call. 

“Hey, mom. What’s wrong?” You can hear the resigned sigh in your voice. Captain Mitchell has stopped walking, waiting for you. You shoo him away, not wanting to inconvenience him more.

Your mother’s voice is unintelligible. Staticky and blurred. 

“My baby!” she finally says in words you can understand. “Where are you? I came home and looked in your room and you were gone!”

You rub your eyes. 

“Mom. You’re drunk. Where’s Kevin?”

Usually, by this point, Kevin, your stepdad would step in. 

Maybe, you think, somewhat bitterly, he’s come to his senses and left the crazy lady. 

“Out,” is all she says. “You’re not still running around with the Navy, are you?”

She’s says the word Navy like it’s a slur. 

“Mom-“

“Because this is just a phase, (y/n). You’ll get over it and realize that I was right all along. You don’t belong on the battlefield, you belong in school.”

“Mom, as a matter of fact, i love my job and i’m not planning on leaving it anytime soon.”

This is a conversation you’ve had many a time. Almost every time she’s drunk she calls you up to criticize your life choices. 

“Then you’re a failure.”

“Gosh, I really wonder why I left.”

That’s when you hang up, abruptly cutting off your mother mid sentence. 

You make it all the way to the barracks before you angrily start punching things. The nice thing about living on base again is the free gym available to you, so you change into a ratty old shirt and shorts and go down to the officer’s gym, where punching bags are already hanging. 

You do a quick job of wrapping your hands, then begin the assault on a bag, sending it swinging with a punch.

You keep going and going and going until your knuckles feel like they’re bleeding or broken or at least bruised, and all the stress and anger with your mother has burned off. 

You hit the shower after the gym, then collapse into bed.

Your phone is lit up with four call notifications and twenty six text messages from your mom, which you promptly ignore, silence your phone and fall asleep.

“Duchess, fly away!”

“Get out of there!”

“It’s okay.”

“Majesty!”

Your eyes snap open, your back and arms are covered in sweat. You hold your breath in and let it out, trying to calm your heartbeat. 

You glance at the clock. 

Jesus Christ, it’s only three in the morning. 

This mission can’t come soon enough.

—

btw i know nothing about north island or the navy

#top gun maverick #top gun imagine #mitchell! reader #pilot!reader #Dagger squad #natasha trace xreader #the hard deck #rooster x reader #new series #top gun maverick imagine #pete maverick mitchell #maverick x reader

[oddogoblino]

runs in here

HI HELLO

i know i said a while ago id draw your sona !!!!!!!

sooo

im sorry it took so long !!!!! but i had fun drawing your sona :D

i hope you like it !!! ( also i hope i didn't forget any details !! im sorry if i did )

OOOOOOOOOHHHH MMYYYYYY STTAAAAARRRSSSSSSS ITS ME IT SME EIT THAT S ME OH MY GOSHNESS THATS THATS ME ANDNYOU- YOU SENT. AME- ME?!?! AND I LOOVK SO SO NICE AND SO SO LOVELY!?!?! YOU DREW ME AS SUCH A SPECIALIST LIL FELLA!?!! UWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA 😭♥️💕💖💕💕💖♥️💖♥️💕💕💖♥️💕💕💖♥️💕♥️💖💖♥️💕💖💕♥️💖💕♥️💕♥️💖💕💖♥️💕💖♥️♥️💖💕💕💕💕♥️♥️💕💕♥️💕♥️

HEARTS FOREVER! HEARTS FOR A HUNDRED THOUSAND GOBLINO YEARS!!!

No apologizing for however amounts of time you take and need, you're in no obligation to make me anything and I appreciate the fact you drew my lil silly self at all so precious to me and beloved QuQ tysm

#oddito answerito #beloved skrunklebunkle #UWAAAAHH IT MEEEE E EMEMEDHSNAJXCKSJAJXJCJAMA #skoaaaAaaAaaaa

[toomuchracket]

i dont know if it sent or not so im sending it again. i met him like 2 years ago online we talked literally all day everyday for a majority of it. everything was going great he knew everything about me i knew everything about him. we used to group listen to music on spotify and build the same lego sets together as “dates” from thousands of miles away i showed him waterparks (big mistake) he was calling me love and his perfect girl but said he didnt want a long distance girlfriend(????) yet he was still flirting with me nonstop. telling me he loved me all while trying to sext with me (i was always eating when he would lol) he slowly started calling me lad instead of love and said we were just “good friends” a few days before thanksgiving last year i had told him i was having a panic attack and he blocked me. out of nowhere. he up and blocked me. i didnt really know what to think at the time but i wouldnt let myself cry and because he was so far away we were friends on discord and in a server with some mutual friends and he ended up reaching out to me on there a few months ago asking me if i regret it, how i was doing etc. and he asked me to fly out to cardiff from florida. i told him i couldnt afford it said he would pay for my flight and tickets to see parx (should of done it) all he wanted was one thing in return. (bet you cant guess what) so i blocked him and let myself be upset this time and it wasnt even like. i was upset about the situation but he fucked up a majority of waterparks songs for me.

noooooooooo i'm so sorry, babe. i know you liked him at some point, but i think you made the right decisions by not flying to see him and also by blocking him again. and it's truly horrible that he ruined the band for you, but try to remember that despite that being a common point of interest, you had it first - lorde once said something about her own album like "he'll never hear these songs the way you do. cherish the world you built with them". idk if you'll take any comfort from that, but yeah. you're too good for him! sending love <3

#mads answers asks #chatty bits

[atherix]

YOU- I'm very sorry for not screaming in your ask box a lot lately, life's been a thing... BUT IM HERE NOW, AND OHMYGOD seems like ohmygrian would also work given recent events ATHERIX IM SCREAMING AND SHAKING YOU WHAT JUST HAPPENED

Ok ok ok, so lore lots of lore where to begin

Let's start off with one of the big ones. WATCHERS?? I am very calmly and politely asking you what the hell is happening with Scott and Jimmy. What. is. happening. Listener lore?? Other equally interesting plot points?? Only time will tell I suppose... I don't like how much power you hold over us atherix 😑 you like the tourment a little too much 😑 but seriously I love it so much you evil writer

Don't you just love it when your mate is brutaly murdered infront of you, then ages later (is it hundereds of years? thousands? i cant remember. lets just say time. Time has passed), you find 2 new mates! Who you love very deeply! Who you would do anything for! Only to learn one of them is constantly tap dancing at deaths door, and the other has now become a God after friggin dying in front of you 🙂 You cradled his dead body in your arms. You uselessly checked for breath even while knowing there was none left. You begged him to come back, to not leave you like she did begged him to LIVE. couldn't save them couldn't save them couldn't save And then he does. he comes back. And he's a watcher now! So you know. There's that. Then he tries to single handedly fight off two harbingers of death while injured, and while using his godly powers for the first time! <3 like an idiot <3 Everything's going great :D

Then scar. Scar. I think him and I need to have a little chat about the whole distracting the warden thing. Brave! Stupid! Suicidal! Luv I don't care if you think you're gonna die at any moment, please have some self preservation <33 if not for your sake, at least for your son?? And your mates?? (On the other hand it was very sweet. Still stupid, but sweet) But wow is he going through it too... nothing like a track record of your loved ones consistently dying for you :) it's something he's definitely not traumatised over :)) it's all completely fine :))) someone get this man some cuddles and emotional support STAT

By the way Tubbo must be having a great time right now 😃

All of their mental and physical health needs some serious help rn

Atherix. ATHERIX. 30 thousand years?? The magic residue?? The unsolved mysteries?? What does scar know... what's going on... what pieces of the puzzle are we missing... or have we completed the puzzle and it's just upside-down? Either way it's pain :D

Also the worldbuilding detail?? The descriptions of the city?? The wardens?? The enchanting?? This all makes me very happy <33

Im sure I've forgotten a LOT about these last 2 chapters, but this is all I got for now... your writing has a grip on me ohmygod

So yeah I'm normal about this. Thank you for consuming my waking hours <33

-🍂

(This is also from chapter 8/9 not the latest chapter <3)

No worry! Real life is Like That sometimes <3 I hope everything's okay! Highkey if it hadn't been a Serious Moment Grian would have said "you're welcome" when Tubbo said "thank god" LMAO A LOT HAPPENED-

So much lore mmm

YEP. WATCHERS. WE'VE FINALLY MADE IT FOLKS, WE'RE HERE, THE WATCHERS ARE HERE. Haha well we've answered Jimmy, haven't gotten into Scott yet but that will come up in the future <3 I on the other hand LOVE the amount of power I hold over y'all :) This is delightful <3 <3 <3

Mmmm Mumbo was born almost 500 years ago so it's been probably a little more than 4.5 centuries <3 But yes. Mmmm history sure does rhyme. "One of them is constantly tap dancing at death's door" I'M SORRY I AM SENT HJKSJKJKFSHJ but yes! Yes! Mmm Mumbo watching yet another mate of his get killed and he has absolutely no power to stop it :) Only this time the mate WAKES UP and now he has to trust the mate who just died and came back to know what he's doing so Mumbo can go help their mate to not die, too! Yay! Oh the trauma haha Mumbo will have nightmares about this day for the rest of his long life :) Also my dear 🍂Autumn 🍂 Anon how in the world did you make this even angstier than it already is <3 (Fun fact I plan to write a tumblr exclusive/aside of that moment from Mumbo's pov <3) Hahaha yeah god or not might not want to fight off the "monster god" who has ended the world who knows how many times <3 But at least they're there to stop him from facing down the Warden like he tried to face down Blondie <3

Oh yes, Scar is certainly going to be getting Talked With by a few different people in the coming days :) Once they've recovered more haha. "Hey Scar what the fuck" <3 But yes! If he's gonna die he's gonna make it matter </3 Try and give them a chance to get away <3 Mind you Grian's little trick didn't actually work, the Warden just fuckin. Mm. But the fire is a surprise tool for the future ;) God yeah :) Scar is so. Mmm trauma. He doesn't want anyone else to die for or because of him </3 He'll get cuddles and emotional support but he might also need a li'l therapy <3

Tubbo is having a GREAT time haha "I said I was FASCINATED by the Warden, I didn't say I wanted to MEET one!!"

Oh yes. Absolutely. They need all the help they can get.

:) Haha chapter ten answers these <3

I love worldbuilding and I really wanted to flesh the Ancient City out so <3 I'm glad you enjoy this~! <3 hjhgjfdj <3

Haha you've summed it up pretty well methinks <3 Thank you much <33 hhghjjhgdj <3

Thank you for reading~! <3

#ask #Midnight Series #🍂autumn🍂 anon #Long Post #<3

[star-ocean-peahen]

Ok this is definitely asking for a LOT of information, but I was wondering if I could please get a bullet point rundown of Legacy of a Millennia? I've been thinking about the trio you keep talking about but can't stay into your long posts long enough to actually get anything out of them ykdlgdyldd (all I really know is that Link fell into the fae realm and had her original name taken from her + was a servant for a while before escaping the realm) (also that Shei is straight up not having a good time for reasons I don't know)

😂😂 yeah sure! Sorry my long textposts don't work for you. I hope this is.......somewhat better. There's a TLDR at the bottom with just the three main characters if that works better.

One thousand years ago Link (5 years old) is kidnapped and enslaved by the faerie, made to serve in the house of the Fae Lord.

This traumatizes her heavily and leaves her with many scars, physical and mental (+ a pair of antlers and snake fangs) also her name stolen (dw she picks a new one)

In the same time period, the tyrannical queen has an affair with a winemaker and bears a bastard son

This is Shei

He grows up with his dad until he reaches thirteen, when he starts showing signs of the goddess' bloodline and his mother imprisons him in the deepest dungeon

When he's seventeen a rebel group stages a coup and kills all known members of the royal line, leaving Shei as the last of Hylia's bloodline

When his mother dies, he gets this thing called the Goddess Blood-Essence

The GBE is basically what marks whatever royal child as the Princess Zelda for this iteration of adventure, so it carries little bits of the most influential princesses of the past (that doesn't give special powers or voices or anything, its just fun)

As the royal line is deposed, Ganon stirs from his seal underneath the castle and the Goddess Blood-Essence reacts by sealing it and its host into a stasis crystal

Fast forward a thousand years and Link has escaped faerie at the age of twelve. She finds a landing pad (helping a nice old grandma) for the next five years.

When she's seventeen she goes to the castle guarding some goods from the village, but gets arrested for resisting the new dynasty's attempts to seize the goods

In the dungeon Impa (who is leading a resistance against the tyrannical monarchy) finds her, realizes her dormant potential, and helps her escape

As the two run from the guards, they delve deeper into the dungeons

Eventually they run into Shei's stasis crystal, undisturbed for a thousand years

Link accidentally opens it, Ganon escapes, Shei falls motionless to the floor, the guards are approaching-

so she just scoops him up bridal style and vamooses through a secret passage Impa shows her (Impa can shapeshift into a mourning dove btw)

Link and Shei set out to help Impa liason with the other races of Hyrule in order to strengthen her resistance by dealing with their Ganon-caused problems and yes i KNOW ganon is underdeveloped i promise im working on it

ANyway not too long after this they run into a Stalfos general that Ganon sent after them who they convince to turn traitor with ✨the Power of Friendship✨ (also known as I Want It To Happen But I Haven't Figured Out Why Yet)

This Stalfos decides to reject the side of evil and try to become her own person, and in doing so, takes the name Stella (geddit cuz stal.....stella.....also shes the stars and shei's the moon and link's the sun okay ill shut up now)

It's a running joke that Shei constantly gets into some sort of trouble that Link has to save him from. Falling off cliffs, cornered by monsters, anything like that. Basically a joke on the hero saving the princess except it goes deeper than that.

Originally, it was my plan to have Shei die at the midpoint of the story. He would split the GBE into pieces that Link and Stella would run around gathering (dungeon formula).

Stella would take on the mantle of carrying the GBE, and when it was fully assembled (before the final fight) she would transform into a Hylian with flesh and skin and hair and organs and all that.

However, it has come to my attention that Shei's death hinders the emotional narrative rather than continue it, so it is with a heavy heart that I must scrap it. Further, more suitable events for the second half of the story are on the drawing board.

Dungeon premise for the first half: Hunting down the various races to liasion with them and gain their trust to help in Impa's resistance. Added bonus of hunting down Ganon's infection and keeping him from leeching strength from them.

Dungeon premise for the second half: Hunting down the various (five) pieces of the Goddess Blood-Essence, each of which has fallen into different hands.

Er, that's the best bullet-pointed backstory I could come up with? If you have any questions I'll do my best to be succinct.

TL;DR

Link lived in faerie from age 5-12 during which a thousand years passed. Now, in her late teens, she's trying to find herself and her place in this unfamiliar world. Along the way she returns to the fae who abused her and whoops his ass in a metaphorical boss fight meant to represent her determination of her identity.

Shei is a bastard son of the royal family, who ended up as the last living descendant of Hylia when everyone in the royal line was killed during a revolution. He was sealed away (holding back Ganon) for a thousand years before being awakened by Link. It's a constant that he gets into all the trouble and Link always rescues him.

Stella used to be a Stal general in Ganon's army before being redeemed by the Power of Friendship (otherwise known as I Don't Know How Yet) and recruited into the group. At the game's midpoint, Shei passes the mantle and powers of Hylia's line to her, and when she acquires it in its fullness (after a series of main story quests, near the end of the game), she is given a human body. She is the one that assists you in the final fight.

#Legacy of a Millennia #loam #sorry this took so long! #mystie!! fren!!

[papirouge]

I sent you message a few days ago about traditional women and dating and I think it didn't send because of my shitty computer u.u I guess I'll write something similar.

Anyways, if I was a grifter or e-beggar I'd also cater to right wingers because they tend to have more money than leftists. I remember this black woman who posted on twitter about how she got kicked out of her house for supporting Trump, alongside a photo of herself wearing a MAGA hat partially obscuring her face. She asked for donations to help her desperate situation, and right wingers literally gave her thousands of dollars thinking she was one of them. Later, it was revealed she was lying and wasn't a trumper or kicked out of her house, and she simply dissapeared with all of their money. Don't know what happened after, if she ever got caught or what, she might still be enjoying all that conservative money for all I know.

Cant say I understand this mentality; I could never betray my own race or sex or culture just for some conservative money, I just have too much dignity and respect for that

I actually have a friend that hangs with conservatives and right wingers, and she has told me that trad men and the like tell her that they tend to find the women in their circles boring. Which makes sense if you think about it, as these women usually limit themselves to "femenine" hobbies and skills, thus meaning that these "masculine" trad men end up finding little in common with them that they can bond over and have fun with. There's also the fact that some of these tradwomen convince themselves they have to dumb themselves down to attract any of these "manly" men, so these men end up dealing with women that can't keep up with them intellectually and dont offer them a mental challenge, thus boring them to death.

Another point is that many of these tradfems are too "man pleasing", and while these ladies brag about hating hookup culture and having standards and hating sex positivity, they end up coming as too "easy" to many of these men. Because while this woman respects and strokes your ego as a man, she might as well be doing it to any other man that gives her a crumb of attention, meaning that there's no respect or admiration to be won from her, you're not special to her and there's no "chase" or "challenge". It has been pointed out before that many of these men don't date any of these tradwomen, usually prefering other type of ladies.

The fact that some of these women can't find a man in these traditional spaces is weird as hell considering there's more redpilled or tradmen than women. There's something sketchy going on, like you'd have to be completely repulsive in basically every way to not be able to find someone, even if its bottom of the barrel tradmen. It's just suspicious.

And lately, it makes sense that some white tradmen end up dating asian and black women even if they're white supremacists or whatever. They might talk about how superior the white race is, but ultimately they're straight men so obviously they're going to be attracted to women of other races too. And many of these women, while raised in traditional societies, still have standards for their men and expect them to fullful the male role and be providers and protectors aka they're not impressed by any man.

My original message was better written and mcuh more coherent, but im ok as long as this one sends....

SORRY ANON FOR BEING SO LATE REPLYING THAT YOU ASK LOST 😭😭

It's here

I think shoe0nhead is a good cautionary tale of how far being a pickme will lead you to. Homegirl has been wasting years of her "young & breedable" years with a master scrote who never married her, left her for another (ironically older) woman, and now is being clowned by rightoid scrotes (who are a good chunk of her audience) for being old and degrading herself for the man who didn't marry her 🥴

She didn't even celebrate her turning 30 💀 I guess she's getting highly defensive of not being able to milk her youthfulness for her pandering grift anymore 👀

She just got financé by her new boyfriend who's a Christian so I hope he'll eventually marry her but it's interesting how despite doing the most for all those years she never managed to tie the knot earlier..

#answered

[writing-on-the-wahl]

Okay, this one’s been done already by other blogs and I understand that not every writer wants to do the same prompt as another so if you’re not comfortable with this then absolutely stay in your comfy zone. I just think it’s fun to see different interpretations

But basically, Civilian is unknowingly dating Villain (as in, Civilian doesn’t know that villain is a criminal), and Villain is introduced to Civilian’s brother, Hero. Hero is terrified that Villain is going to hurt Civilian the entire time, but Villain just keeps on showing lots of sweet affection to Civilian (Hero and Villain recognize each other but Civilian is clueless of both their “jobs”). It’s up to you whether or not Villain actually loves Civilian or is just taunting/threatening Hero :)

Wow that was long my bad

Sorry this took me like twelve years to get to... @glowing-alpaca it won’t let me tag you... idk why🤷🏽‍♀️

Ok yes I’ve seen a few of these, so I took the general principle and made it Civilian’s POV eehehehe

hope you enjoy:)

*special thanks to @im-a-wonderling and @watercolorfreckles for the beta reads and all your amazing help on this one!!*

———————————————

Civilian shifted from foot to foot, rubbing her left wrist as she tried to focus on the conversation swirling around her. Her limbs felt lead-heavy and numb, deadweights that she wasn’t sure what to do with.

She clasped her hands together in front of her, then let them hang by her sides. Then clasped them in front of her again.

Her breathing felt loud in her ears, and a few of the patrons glanced in her direction. Could they hear her breathing?

Her eyes darted to the entrance for the hundredth time. Her brother was late. Hero had promised to be here early—he knew how she felt about crowds. And since he was the one who insisted her first art show be public, he’d reassured her he’d stay by her side the whole time.

The show had started over an hour ago.

“Well, Civilian?”

Her eyes snapped away from the door and back to the circle of patrons around her. Her stomach sloshed cold. They were all looking at her, their stares burning holes.

“Sorry? What was that?” Her stomach continued to twist and writhe. Now they all knew she’d been distracted.

Did they think she was ignoring them? Had she been rude?

She’d only glanced at the door for a moment…

An older man shook his head as his companion repeated her question about her choice to use different mediums to portray the same image.

She answered the best she could, gesturing to the wall beside her, which was filled with a dozen paintings and drawings of the cityscape—some created with ink, other with oil, acrylic, watercolor, or charcoal—she’d used them all.

She rubbed her wrist again as she tried to explain how she’d used the different mediums.

A few in the circle nodded their heads, but her heart was pounding and doubt nagged at her as she spoke. Was she talking too much? Not enough? Was what she was saying stupid?

She stumbled over her words, unease crawling beneath her skin.

She looked down, unable to complete her thought.

“I think it’s a marvelous technique.”

Hero looked up sharply as the deep voice continued, covering the awkward pause she’d created.

“...to get to look at a wall full of paintings, all capturing the same image but each conveying a different mood or emotion.”

Her rescuer was sharply dressed: his dark hair carefully styled, his suit perfectly tailored, and his gold watch designer. Combined with his confident posture, his appearance practically screamed “lawyer,” same as her brother. But while Hero was a public defense attorney, crusading against a flawed system, the man in front of her was probably what Hero would call a ‘leech,’ a rich defense lawyer catering to the criminal elite.

And while Civilian sympathized with Hero’s cause, she also had enough experience as a starving artist to appreciate the luxury of not having to worry about how much money she had to spend at the grocery store.

Plus, he’d been so kind to save her; how bad could he be?

Her rescuer was still speaking, his smooth words and confident tone confirming his profession.

“... the kind of art that needs to be seen and studied to be appreciated.”

At his hint, the crowd began to drift towards the gallery walls.

Her rescuer met her gaze through the crowd, and she offered him a small smile of gratitude as the people around her shifted away.

She turned towards the wall of cityscape paintings, breathing a sigh of relief before stopping to analyze one of the city in the rain. She eyed the brushstrokes, mentally smoothing a line here, adding a shadow there. She shook her head and turned away. Now was not the time.

But her rather abrupt turn sent her careening into a wall-like something that wasn’t a wall, but a certain tall lawyer in a thousand-dollar Armani suit. She jerked back, horrified at her lack of grace, but tripped on her blasted heels. Hands at her waist stopped her fall, long fingers tightening around her as she regained her balance. When she was finally steady, his hands slid away.

“Thanks.” Civilian forced herself to look up into the face of the man who had now rescued her twice, rather than looking around like she wanted to to check who else had noticed her embarrassing almost-fall.

He was smiling warmly, and for the first time all night, her heart wasn’t pounding at the thought of speaking with a stranger.

“I’m sorry for running into you.” She felt breathless, but it must have been from her almost-fall.

He waved her off. “I shouldn’t have been standing so close. I just wanted to compliment the way you’ve captured my favorite view of the city.” He gestured to the painting she’d just been critiquing.

“I painted it at the top of the—“

“Capitol building, yes I go there often.”

“Because you work there often?” Civilian flushed as she spoke across him, but her heart steadied as he didn’t seem to mind. His smile widened, and he leaned closer.

“What gave me away?” His voice was deep, and he looked at her as though they were sharing a secret.

Her cheeks grew warmer, and she looked away, heart racing for an entirely different reason.

“My brother is a lawyer, so I usually can just tell. He was supposed to be here actually…” a frown came to her face as she remembered her brother’s promise.

She shook herself out of her reverie. Her rescuer was looking at her warmly.

“I’m sorry! You rescued me back there, and I don’t even know your name…” She looked at him expectantly, and he offered a bright smile that made her stomach flutter.

“I’m Villain. Pleased to meet you.” His voice was practically a purr, sending tingles across her skin as he took her hand, gently raising it to his lips. She looked down as her cheeks heated at the old fashioned gesture.

“I’m Civilian,” she said as he released her hand, returning his bright smile with a shy one of her own. “Although you probably already knew that since my name is on the program...”

He nodded. “I have to say, I’m quite impressed by your—”

“Civilian!”

A blur in a tan suit darted around Villain and grabbed her arm, pulling her back.

“Hero, what?—” Her brother was a mess. His suit was wrinkled, tie coming undone, hair mussed.

He continued to pull her back, eyes on Villain. “Civilian I need to talk to you—it’s urgent!”

She glanced back at Villain as Hero tugged her away.

“Sorry!” She mouthed.

He just shook his head, an amused smile on his face, before mouthing something that looked suspiciously like, “I’ll see you later.”

Her heart warmed, and she was still grinning when Hero pulled her around the corner and flipped her around to face him.

“What are you—”

“Do you have any idea who that is?” Hero’s fingers gripped her shoulders. “What he is?”

“He said his name was Villain? And so what that he’s a lawyer, Hero. I don’t get why you are freaking out!”

Hero’s hands shook her shoulders. “He’s not just a lawyer, he—”

Civilian wrenched free and shoved Hero’s chest. “He what? Actually helped me? When YOU failed to show up like you promised.” Her last words slid into a growl.

Hero had the decency to look ashamed for a brief moment before his face hardened. He lifted a hand, gesturing with one arm back towards where they’d left Villain. “His people are the reason that I’m late!”

Anger sparked in her chest, and she rolled her eyes. “Sure,” she scoffed, “blame some random lawyer for your broken promise. That’s a pitiful excuse, Hero, even for you.”

She shoved past him, heading back into the gallery.

“Wait, Sis!” He grabbed her arm. She shook him off and stalked away.

But when she returned to the main room, Villain was gone.

#artist civilian #smooth villain #protective hero #villain x civilian #hero x villain #heroes and villains #my writing #snippet #write #writeblr #hero #villain

[ephemerlskies]

constant craving 04 (final) | jjk

⇢ pairing: jungkook x reader

⇢ genre: “drabble” series, best friends to lovers au, slight angst, FLUFF, bestfriend!au, unrequited love, smarter idiots but still idiots all the same

⇢ word count: 6.8k

⇢ warnings: explicit language, mentions of alcohol, excessive drinking (drink responsibly), pining, jungkook is an overdramatic baby, a surplus of feelings (i am disgusted with myself), one (1) fire hazard

⇢ summary: with the Friendiversary approaching quickly, both you and Jungkook have an array of trials to navigate through. and, as Seokjin gets caught in the crossfires, you must finally make a decision that will define how the rest of your life will unfold. 

♪ playlist: constant craving - k.d. lang, bad religion - frank ocean, misunderstood - lucky daye, neu roses - daniel caesar ♪

╰ series index: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 (final)

a/n: wow.... so bitches really call this a drabble series then write a 6 thousand word finale... its me im bitches... anywho, i really love the way this played out!! jungkook had to hit the bottom to start rising to the top and it shows. also, the ending is like....... hehe well ill just let you all see for yourselves. enjoy my lovely readers! this wrapped up such a heartfelt series that is so dear to my heart. thank you all for the support for this! and i might whip up a few drabbles simply because i think this relationship is really cute hehe ok... happy reading! <3

part four: i love you too

Carrying that music box in his pocket felt like a well-deserved and all too grim reminder of what went down a few days ago. Sitting drunk yet again, though one would best describe Jungkook’s posture as more of a sloven pile of flesh and bones withering away on a bar stool, he searched for the wallet which was in one of his four pockets.

He reached for the wrong one. Instead of the faux leather skimming his skin, it was a solid wood corner pricking the pad of his index finger. It stung more than it should have. Perhaps he'd gotten a splinter, or the top layer of his skin was simply too raw from all the wear and tear of your fight. Jungkook wasn’t one to jump at such negligible shocks, but it sank him back into that night. It wasn't the wooden corner at all.

You loved him. You still love him.

That's what you said. That's what nearly put him on the floor instead of in his chair, and what had been preying on his mind as if he were no different than a helpless animal drowning his regrets in whiskey. And he knew he should have said it back. 

Jungkook theorized ways to defy the cruel restraints of time, and if the universe would be so kind as to allow him to travel back to that day in middle school when he happened upon a scared, flush-faced student running so fast and panicked that they bumped into each other, just to be the one who said 'I love you' first. Or those genies and shooting stars and blessed fountains that supposedly granted wishes; he would pay no hesitation to plead with whatever deity would listen and permit his most prioritized desire. 

The retrospective bargaining remained a ghost haunting just about every waking moment of his life. Though, he had not been quite sure if said ghost was some cosmic sent presence or simply his own guilt. If regret took on physical ramifications, then Jungkook would have been convinced that was why he felt as if his legs wouldn't have been able to carry him even if he tried.

If I could just go back to that night with the knowledge I know now, I would have hauled my ass to your house instead of that club and told you that my choice was made for me the moment I met you. Every other person I ended up with these past twelve years was simply a buffer for loving you. I had to prepare myself, because loving you was something entirely too tremendous for a boy still grappling with his own faulty speech pattern to assume.

I wish you knew that. I wish I didn’t stand there like an idiot and let you leave, thinking me some hero for finally letting this new guy Seokjin take the place I had always imagined being in. I wish I had just said that I love you.

I love you.

I love you, ___.

Jungkook’s vision resembled that of a smudged lens. However, there were no fingerprints on his eyes. The world had turned blurry and colorless, the latter he knew was not due to the sixth order of whiskey he let soak into his heart’s open wound. 

A life of color was one of the many things that left when you did.

He didn’t know it then, but Jungkook was being fervently dramatic since it had not been more than seventy-two hours the last time he spoke to you. Thought to him, it was akin to being just short of death and taking another breath would have been an expense he wasn’t sufficiently funded to pay. 

Whatever happened in the interim of him paying his tab and walking out onto the sidewalk must have landed somewhere in the blacked out stretches of his inebriated memory, since he was now staring at your contact gleaming on his phone bearing the semblance of one guardian angel.

It was so ingrained into his routine. Opening the app with the phone icon, clicking the ‘recent’ tab, and finding your name no further than three contacts down the list because he called you as if he had important things to tell you, though normally it was just to hear your voice or to tell you about what he had for lunch. And it nestled into his muscle memory as natural as it was for him to breathe or blink. Even when alcohol debilitated his driving, walking, and thinking, his body was drawn to seek a haven such as yourself. And he nearly pressed ‘call’.

Before the comfort of your voice could ring through to his phone, reality descended upon that reflex. Right now, you were probably with Seokjin, attending some pretentious art gallery for one of his colleagues.

It was just Jungkook and the night sky and the moon that he hoped you were gazing at too; it would be the only connection to you as of now. The moon, a parcel for the most longing gazes.

There are stories where the two protagonists get it right. This was not that story. That reality stung more than the residual burn of whiskey clinging along his throat.

Both you and Jungkook made every wrong decision possible. From the moment you subjected yourself to exploiting the veneer of being a ‘good friend’ to disguise any true feelings that might have taken light, to the moment Jungkook was presented with all the excruciatingly obvious signs that you were in love with him, but was simply too inept to notice, to the both of you neglecting any urge threatening the bounds of platonic. Any path that would have steered to a destination where you two would get that happy ending was conveniently untaken.

And you had a long journey riddled with heartbreak after heartbreak to prove it.

He traded his phone with that wooden music box, scuffing the soles of his shoe as he walked back home, hoping he’d be able to give the gift to you on your Friendiversary.

-----

Your pain was still raw. In this way, you had not considered, or rather avoided the idea of tending to such delicate wounds. The days leading up to the infamous anniversary had been spent hoping you would organically heal enough to allow the presence of Jungkook while denying another reopening in your wound.

You had been juggling a not so thrilling number of conflicts the three days preceding that self-acclaimed national holiday.

One, Seokjin and his bottomless supply of invitations that you felt too obligated to refuse. He had such a life packed with plans which is more than you could have said for Jungkook. He, most likely, busied himself with promoting ranks in some obscenely violent video game. Two, a mutual friend of yours had told you Seokjin was fixing to make your relationship official this coming Friday, and you didn’t want to admit the lackluster reaction upon hearing the news was equivalent to receiving a C on a test. It wasn't the worst grade to receive, but you knew there would always be something better than adequacy. Not satisfying enough nor disappointing enough to be dealt with without bending a few expectations. And three, all you really wanted, the only agent of excitability (both good and bad) that diluted the festering numbness in your heart just a tad more, was thinking about seeing Jungkook on your Friendiversary.

But with that excitement, was its equally worrying constituent: whether or not you would be able see Jungkook that day without cracking under pressure.

Things weren’t exactly attuned between the two of you. Your emotional stature had never been more unsynchronized and offkey with Jungkook’s, so, forcing a celebratory movie or dinner would be no different than adding cornstarch to the already thick tension.

“___? Are you listening?” Everything Seokjin had just been droning on about filtered in and out without a single word being absorbed, and you could have pretended this wasn't the case but  stress had apprehended caring enough to lie.

“Sorry… No, I wasn't. I’m just stressed is all.” Since that was only a half lie, self-admonition had not yet taken permanent residency whenever you would look at Seokjin’s eyes offering nothing but genuine tact.

“Oh, sorry to hear! Are you okay? Anything you wanna talk about?” That, and the soft press of his hand over yours had swallowed you into a perpetual, guilty cycle of comparing two incomparable people.

Seokjin was always like this. Serving a gentle smile and honest ears as a vessel of calmness during whatever calamity you were grappling. It was safe knowing if you fell, you’d have a comfortable cushion to soften the impact. He was mindful with his words and had the intelligence to articulate them with impressive eloquence. You were more likely to see pigs fly than to see him stutter. He had a diverse group of friends and walked a steady path to a financially secure life. And you started to wonder what else one would need in a partner? Any sensible person would do much more than you had to snag someone like Seokjin, as handsome as he was kind and respectful. He seemed to have everything Jungkook lacked, including mutual feelings for you.

It would have been entirely too easy to pick him, as if there was a ‘Seokjin’ button and a ‘Jungkook’ button and you could press Seokjin’s on a whim. If choosing him would have meant miraculous nullification of all your very real and very unremitting feelings for that idiot you called your best friend, then you would have done it in a heartbeat.

There wasn't a 'Seokjin' button or a 'Jungkook' button, nor was there a button that would wondrously redistribute your feelings towards Seokjin.

And then there was Jungkook. Always in the back of your mind when he wasn't tenanting the focus of it.

He was never predictable in the ways that mattered. It was just as difficult figuring out his next move as figuring out whether this trait was exciting or exhausting.

Though, this had not been to say you didn’t know him well; in fact, all his habits and preferences and pet peeves could be bound into a book, written by you, and it would be so accurate anyone who read it would think it was an autobiography. He knew you to the same caliber. Where Seokjin would ask what was wrong, Jungkook wouldn’t need to. He already learned your behavior to know to say something along the lines of ‘tell me what’s wrong when you're ready, we can watch your favorite movie or swing by that Chinese place with those great fried dumplings in the meantime’. And on more favorable occasions, he'd say nothing and simply wrap you in his arms and let his shirt become a delta for your tears.

To anyone else, that might sound entirely too frank and perhaps a bit dismissive to be comforting, but to you it was the exact cure for each affliction. To never need explanations that would validate your feelings because Jungkook saw to that right when he took notice; to never manufacture fake smiles through failed attempts at cheering you up since, of course, he knew exactly what to do to vegetate joy in your heart and earn a smile from years and years —and years— of practice. It had almost driven you mad, thinking about how he knew from a shift in your brow what you were feeling and yet, somehow, never realized how deeply in love you were.

All the while, the moment you were convinced you had been versed fluently in his every move, he would pawn another blindsight that would leave you breathless and amazed all the same. Jungkook always had concealed tricks up his sleeve, and life was anything but repetitive with him. You would more often than not find yourself struggling to relearn language and existing itself just to keep up with him. How exactly he managed to wield such diametric facets of being was an enigma beyond the reasoning of this universe.To feel like home, somewhere you belonged outside of your own body, and a daring voyage into a completely new world all at once must have meant he was some sort of Godsend. Only angels could have sculpted a soul so magnetizing, you assumed.

Seokjin was an umbrella, shielding you on some arcane journey under an unforgiving rainfall. Your shoes kept dry and your hair intact.

And if he was the umbrella, then Jungkook was the rain. Falling everywhere and all at once, so that you couldn't help but let yourself be saturated in his entire, vibrant being. And who’s to say letting such a water fall against your skin was a bad thing? Sometimes rain is cleaning, gentle even. They bear fruits as beautiful as rainbows that guide you to an unnamed treasure.

Your treasure, however, had a name.

Jungkook calling.

"___? Hello? You in there?" Seokjin waved his hand in front of your face mostly in a jesting manner, but part of him felt like your eyes were blinded by something held in your heart. If he hadn’t pulled you back into reality, you might have been lost forever.

“I'm just…” Your attention had abandoned this conversation the second his name gave light to your screen. “Sorry, um…”

“It's okay, you can take the call. I’ll be in the kitchen making us some coffee.”

If you were to thank him profusely, it would have been far too obvious how much you missed seeing his name among your notifications, and most likely expose how often you spent thinking of Jungkook while you were supposed to be enthralled with Seokjin. So, you just nodded and answered the phone.

Nodding and answering, as though that didn't feel like taking a breath of clean air after hours of swimming through muddied waters.

“Hello? ___?”

“Jungkook.” It took you longer than usual to form a response and what was assembled had been a half-baked utterance just to let him know you were on the other side of the phone, hearing his voice and feeling a surge of energy course through your veins like he was some delicious narcotic filling life into you after only a week without him.

“___.” Jungkook was in his own debt of words as well. The exchange halted for a few seconds, a jaded breathing cutting the cracked static.

“Look-”

“Hey so-”

Any hope that you had finally caught up to the same page as Jungkook was lost. Now, it seemed you two were reading entirely different books.

“You go.” You said after another dreadful pause. He was the one who called, so he should be the one carrying the burden of navigating through this deafening tension.

“Well, I- uh… I… Well, you see I was just, um, wondering…” Jungkook’s heart must have shut off. That would explain why even the most rudimentary of words felt closer to a foreign language. Or, why he was making conscious efforts to counteract the threat of his nearly dormant lisp.

His brain was drained dry of any blood, his inner mechanisms were shutting down. Even without the alcoholic filter catching words and common sense in its web, Jungkook felt himself fall into an overactive state of dumbfoundedness. Sobriety only a cataract for his emotional override. 

“Our friendiversary?”

“I’m sorry, I did not understand literally anything you just said.”

“Me neither.”

The charming and familiar laugh that spilled through the speaker reminded you that Jungkook was in fact a real person. Not some figmented embodiment of every lost and unrequited and tortuous feeling you had been suppressing for twelve years. Jungkook was real, his laugh and everything else you loved about him were all so incredibly real. And more importantly, the pure joy you felt was real; a permanent serialization of his. Your smiles and his smiles had always surfaced in tandem.

Now, you both were laughing. Neither were warranted by his messy attempt at forming a coherent sentence. The weight of discomfort shedding from your shoulders had been partnered with a slew of relieved chuckles.

“Anyway, um. I- I still wanna see you on our Friendiversary. Or, at least give you your gift.” Admitting that was terrifying but the thought of breaking the consecutive streak of eleven years simply because he was too much of a coward to admit he wanted to see you dizzied him. However, the thought of spending your friendiversary alone terrified him beyond comprehension. So, he thought not about that as a possibility; he carved an opening to his heart in hope you wouldn’t send sharp thorns of rejection into it.

“Yeah, I, uh. I still wanna see you too. I mean, it is a national holiday. We gotta have holiday spirit, right?” You were forcing playful banter, it felt like lemon juice scouring cuts on your tongue, but you were so desperate to make things between you two feel normal.

“You’re right! So, um… You can come over tomorrow night. I’ll set up a surprise or whatever.” He seemed to have fallen back into stride with pre-confession Jungkook. Trying to keep up with him now would just exhaust you of all your means, so you chose to save the rest for tomorrow night. Even if that meant watching him walk away to some unforeseeable finish line; his back, the last part of him you’d see until you could finally collect your broken pieces and start walking as well.

“Sounds good! I’ll, um, see you then.”

“See you, ___.”

You had no idea, and how could you, that Jungkook was now wiping small clusters of wetness from the bed of his eyelids. Why he thought you, the one person that remained a constant in his life, would say no to him over one fight (of many) made for quite the spill of tears. But if you did know, you would have told him you felt like crying too.

"Hey! How did everything go?" You were so immersed in your virtual conversation with Jungkook you nearly forgot the person you were presently with. The train of guilt wouldn't stop for your pathetic attempts at disembarking.

"Oh! Thanks for the coffee." You sipped, and it had just been a stall to blink away the tears that were straying beyond your will of concealment. "It went good. We're still celebrating our Friendiversary."

"Friendiversary?" Seokjin's light chuckle veiled his tense concern.

"Yeah... Uh, it's just this thing we do to celebrate our friendship. The day we met."

"Oh... that's..." His eyes were scaling the rim of his mug.

"That's what, Seokjin?" You were stern, knowing well enough it was born of far more than platonic defensiveness. And you had no right to be the one prosecuting him since you clearly had more to hide than meets the eye.

"I mean, it's just interesting how dedicated you are to an anniversary with a friend." Seokjin wielded that soft-spoken voice which made it difficult to be anything but patient with him. And from the tone of it, he seemed to have no ill intentions with that statement, though it had not been an entirely innocent observation. To you, however, it felt like he might as well have set you on fire.

"Interesting? What is that supposed to even mean? I mean, we've been friends for twelve years. I- I don't know why people are always so judgmental." Your arms crossed over your chest, hoping he would take notice how much his comment slighted you. If asked, you would have insisted you would have been this worked up over any of your friends. Though you knew well enough this was untrue, and it made you feel even worse acting as though Seokjin was the one at fault here.

"I'm sorry. I'm not judging you, really. I just... I just have never heard of two friends doing something like that so religiously."

You sighed out all your anger, knowing the way you snapped at him was merely misdirected frustration. "No, I'm sorry. I know it's kinda weird."

"Look, I get it. You guys are close. But, ___, you talk about him so much that half, no, over half of your stories include him. We've been dating for, what, barely a week now, and I know more about this Jungkook guy than I know about you, and I haven't even met him."

Lips parted, ready to dispatch another slew of defenses to refute all the things he said. It was more disappointing than it was shocking to find nothing but a long sigh emerging. Because he was right. Jungkook has been interwoven so thoroughly in your last twelve years that if you only told the stories without him in it, then it would be the least accurate and nondescript retelling of your life. Fragments of an unfinished novel. It would miss the most crucial pieces, entire chapters, of your story.

You would have been presenting a shell of you, hollow and one dimensional. All the inner parts of you, the lungs and veins and tissue that gave you life and made you whole belonged solely with Jungkook.

That's why you sat there, blank faced, foolishly waiting for the words that wouldn't come to your aid because you had no place to contend with him.

"Seokjin... I'm with you..." It's all that would come up your throat, and it felt like acid. You were sure it burned his ears when he heard them more than it had your throat.

It hadn’t even been partially true. Physically you were with him, but in your head you were sitting on your couch with Jungkook, consuming a concerning amount of junk food while chatting through a movie used more as background noise than entertainment.

"Okay. Does that mean you don't have feelings for him?"

"Well..."

"Can you confidently say you could replace all the time you spend with him with time you would spend with me?" Seokjin must have noticed your returning tears because he loosened his verbal grip from your throat. To you, it sounded like he was pacifying you for some horrible sin, to anyone else it sounded as though he was simply trying to dredge up feelings that would disrupt the chance of a relationship between you and him. "___, I like you. I really do, but in all honesty, I'm looking for something serious. I think we would be great together, but only if you don't have any feelings left for him."

"Seokjin..." You regretted looking at him.

Sweetness was strewn in his eyes and gentle smile. Seokjin was softer than cotton, which made the real threat, the rough sandpaper wearing away skin and bones, you. It made it all the more painful to know you had been keeping everything you felt for Jungkook hidden from Seokjin. Though, if one would have presented an objective point of view, your feelings were far from secretive. And the most brutal honesty was that you knew feelings for Seokjin were never in your attainability. Not the way they always had been for Jungkook.

He was the wrong person who crossed paths with you at the right moment. A mere convenience. And you knew he deserved much more than what you had to offer.

"And maybe I'm being an idiot, but I like you too much to give you some ultimatum which would put you in such an unfair position. So, I'll let you think this over." His compassion felt more like a sharp blow to your chest. “No pressure.”

If he hadn’t smiled like he did, then you would have broken up with him right then and there. It was not possible to rip away such tender hope away from a smile so sweet.

"I'm sorry." You meant the remorse behind those words and it still hadn’t amounted to a proper consolation. "I'm sorry. I guess... I guess I'll go... Seokjin?”

“Yes?” He replied quickly, and you knew only a pace that rapid was one brought on by a sliver of faith that you might have made your decision right then.

“You’re a really great person. You deserve the world.”

Unfortunately, you couldn’t give him what he wanted. And as bitter and unkind as that might have felt at the moment, it was the only bit of truth and relent you could have offered him.

-----

In your bed, sleep became somewhat of an abstract desire. You knew your rest was deprived from you when the digital clock on your bedside told you it was six hours past the time you'd normally fall asleep. It was because you really did have a choice to make now.

To choose Seokjin, and know you'd collapse in the safety of his reciprocated affection, though haunted by how you would never feel the fullest extent of content. And you would live with that until resentment and distance wedged irreversible damage in your relationship.

Or, to choose Jungkook, which would catapult you into a depth so dark and tenuous that you would have no idea whether you'd meet gentle snow or hard, deadly concrete when you landed. And maybe you'd never land at all; maybe you would be caught in a state of falling down and down forever, until your beating heart eventually stilled.

Which one was worth it? Which were you willing to risk? These were the questions that kept you awake.

The hours leading to your undisclosed celebration events with Jungkook ceased being actual points of your existence and merely obstructions that you had to plow through in order to arrive at some conclusive moment. Something that might give you an answer to all your questions. Something that might have released you from devotedly checking your phone for a Jungkook patented text or call.

You were turning into a half-being. Someone who could only inhale a full breath, laugh an intentional laugh, and sleep a soundless sleep when their other half was there.

If you thought being in love with Jungkook for your entire friendship was pathetic, then you couldn’t fathom what you had become now.

Standing in front of his door, the same one you lugged him to that night he was too drunk to balance on his feet, when you willingly carried all the weight he couldn’t, when your lips became acquainted and comfortable with his within half a beat, you felt as if this chunk of wood was mocking you. A partition barricading you from Jungkook. Your Jungkook. The man you always felt you were on the outskirts of, with only a window to peer into his unreadable mind. And that was enough for you ―until now.

Now you were going to knock on that door with your hand, make him open it for you, and walk into his home. You would be the one to step foot inside of the very structure that only solicited closed doors and immovable walls and fogged windows. And you would leave behind your timidity, every feeling and urge that left you with disappointing compromises for the sake of maintaining this friendship.

You would be selfish, and he would finally feel a mere glimpse of what you have always felt for the best and worst of your life.

Even when he opened the door, arming a smile that actively disarmed you, this home of his was yours to conquer. This was your time to act for you alone, despite how many smiles he sent your way. You had not any weapons or shields or an infantry for a clutch. You just had your heart and all the love it carried. 

“Hey! ___, you look… You look great.” There was no real incentive for him to censor how he truly thought you looked. Immeasurably beautiful. It was simply his own nerves impeding on the feelings that were too intense to express without it being followed by an entire soliloquy of I love you’s.

“Thanks... You too...” You could almost feel the words brimming in your and Jungkook’s mouth, carrying such raw emotions and longing intentions.

"I'm really glad that- Jungkook..." Walking into his house punctuated what you were about to say.

His living room was strewn with enough candles to steal the last of your words and to consider his house a fire hazard. That didn't negate this lovely sea of lights to be anything but romantic and thoughtful. A bit cluttered, and not at all perfect, but it must have taken Jungkook hours to set up every wax column. The thoughtfulness of this gesture would have astonished you had it not been for the consistency of Jungkook snatching your breath and words away whenever he tried. It was antithetical, the way you expected his surprises. Yet, always surprised all the same.

Unpredictable, completely surrounding you just like the rain.

"I had to turn off my fire detector but... Worth it." Jungkook considered the number of mishaps that could have dampened any chance of this being romantic.

A candle could tip over and set his entire place ablaze, the wax could leak onto his carpet and tabletops, damaging his furniture and savings for replacements, you and he could have suffocated from all the fumes steaming from the wick. But if that look on your face didn't feel like the only bit of revival to keep his heart's steady beating, if your eyes didn’t look as though it was the only set of eyes that shed beauty into this world then he wouldn't have used up exactly three lighters to pull this stunt. But it did, and he felt warmth and color return to every inch of his body.

He would have used hundreds of lighters to ignite thousands of candles if that meant an ounce of happiness from you. He wanted to say that, but he knew the candles said it for him.

The spectacle almost made you forget why you were here in the first place. It almost made you forget the resolve you managed to gather before entering. And then he said your name.

"___."

The letters flowing from his lips as if they could only be pronounced by his tongue. It sounded so good. So good, that if anyone else were to say it then it wouldn't have been your name at all. It would have sounded wrong, sullied. And it wasn't supplied by neat articulation, this new belonging of your name in his mouth. The need for him to sculpt your name into this world was more than that. "I will never forgive myself if I don't get this out while I still can."

"Jungkook, what is all this?" You didn't know why you felt a collection of tears brimming along your eyes, but you didn't care to figure it out. Perhaps you felt an influx of feelings, an abundance too heavy for your body to seal within the confines of your emotional seams, so they overflowed in the form of tears. This certainly had not been the first time you cried over Jungkook, but you had never cried over him like this.

"___, I love you!" Jungkook said loudly. It was just you and him who could hear, but it felt as though he wanted the entire world to know.

"What? I- You- What?" Your lack of verbal poise was indicative of your love for him once again taking the reins of your mind and heart. Words were a luxury you couldn't afford as of now. You just had to feel everything you were feeling until the rainstorm settled. The hope that he would spare you some remnants of fluency was far along, and you weren't too sure if what Jungkook was about to say would be gentle enough to leave you with any words at all.

"I love you. I don't know why I didn't know it sooner. Or maybe, I- Maybe I did know?" Jungkook sighed at his own ineloquence. "I'm stupid! That's it. That's my only excuse. I'm so stupid. The way I felt about you, the way I still feel about you, is something I thought all best friends had. I thought everyone felt like the moments they weren't spending with their best friends just felt like filler moments. Like, every day I spent without you was just a span of time I had to wait out until I see you again. Like every damn moment of my life is spent waiting for you. And if I don't end up with you then... then I'll never stop waiting."

"Jungkook, I-" He prevailed in surprising you, taking words and breath and thoughts all at once.

"And, I'm that stupid! I really thought all best friends had those moments when they stare at you, and- and-" Now, you weren't the only one with wet eyes and cheeks. "And I just feel like looking at you and being with you just makes me better. It makes me a better person, or something, and it makes me feel like... Like I'll never get hurt again. And even if I do get hurt, I know it's you I want to be there. I know that whenever something bad happens to you, or when you feel like crying or when you're happy or angry or anything that I want to be the one who gets to be by your side. When I look at you, all I want is to love you. To love all your pain away."

"You really mean that?"

"Yes! God, I love you." You didn't notice how it happened, but Jungkook's arms became a shield around you. Inside his arms you were indestructible. Your hands pressed against his cheeks, memorizing the plush, smooth skin. The world could hurl all the fire and ice it had, but it wouldn’t matter. "___, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out. I'm sorry that in that period, I hurt you. Please, forgive me. I love you, and I want to be with you."

"Of course, I forgive you. I... I can't believe this." Hearing everything you always wanted from him was drastically different when it was actually unfolding. It was a million times more than any hope or dream you used as a salve for your longing. It was everything.

"Maybe it took so long because I was afraid. Because the idea of loving you was something I wasn't ready for. Even though I did love you, God, who was I to take on something as fragile and crucial as loving you. I know I probably would have messed it up. And, fuck, maybe I'm messing it up right now. But I just needed it to be perfect. I needed loving you to be perfect because I don't want to give you anything less than that."

"You were always enough for me, Jungkook. More than enough. You were and are everything to me" His arms that pressed you further into him expressed how happy that made him. 

"But I'm not perfect yet. I might mess up... A lot. No, I'll definitely mess up. I don't know if I can offer you perfect yet. But I do know that through everything I have never stopped loving you and I will never stop loving you."

"Jungkook... I don't know what to say." Your thumb grazed a falling tear from his face. Jungkook had not cried often in front of you; and you could tally up the amount of times he had on your fingers alone. But when he did, it was still as beautiful as when he was smiling or laughing or even scowling.

"You could say you love me back." You did. You loved him, his smile that was currently on a mission to melt your heart, his arms that carried both the good and bad parts of you, his wit that you always relished in. All the reasons to love him were an endless flowing river. If you were lucky enough, you would catch a glimpse of each beautiful current and be able to give name to the gravity that pulled you into him.

"I love you too, you idiot." The last word caught in your throat because your lips were being kissed instead.

His lips. Warm and exciting, allotting your being with an infinite devotion of his. And it was more than you could have ever hoped for.

It felt like fire. Like a grove of candles encapsulating the origin of heat. You and Jungkook, holding each other so close, you could have become one. Hot and all-consuming of anything in its path. If one stood too close, they would suffer scorching embers that stray from the orange pyres. Seokjin, Irene, and any other unassuming casualty that had the misfortune of stepping between the two of you, harboring the burn scars to remind them of what fumed from their interference.

Every element concocting between you and him was that of a bright flame, cremating pure metals and wet woods and thick forests alike.

You were in his home. His arms and lips and hands told you it was your home as well. All that time spent wondering why you could never slip inside before was never because he didn't want to let you in. And the thing is, you never thought to knock until now. You sat outside in a silenced hope that he would voluntarily open that door for you. But unknown to you, Jungkook seemed to be waiting as well. Waiting in a large room with empty spaces where you belonged and where he kept reserved for your residence alone.

He waited even when he wasn't quite sure of who he was waiting for, or if you would ever actually spill your warmth into his home. He waited until his fingers turned to ice and his eyes fell to exhaustion, for you to walk inside.

"So, you're like my boyfriend now?" Your voice brushed against his smiling lips.

"Yeah, your boyfriend, or whatever."

"You know this means you have to top next year's friendiversary. And I mean, all these candles? That's gonna be tough." It could have counted as sensory overload, the feeling of his palms flush against your back, the tip of his nose grazing yours, the bright array of candles illuminating the room. But you were so, incredibly cold without him that this felt like solace to you.

"When have I ever disappointed you?" Jungkook regretted what came out of his mouth too late to stop himself from saying it.

"Oh, I couldn't count the amount of times on my fingers alone! What about that time you forgot our chains for the tires on our trip to the mountains? We almost died." His eye roll only encouraged you to continue. Maybe, if you were lucky, he'd equip that cute pout whenever he wanted his way. "Or what about when you swore you brought water, but three miles in on our hike you had that look on your face. You know I reminded you to get water and you swore you did. Or what about-"

"Okay! I get it! I fuck up, jeez." He scrunched his nose, his eyes waning into crescents courtesy of that grin of his. You counted the number of wrinkles along the bridge of his nose as you always did, though you had acquired an expertise in the geography of his face. Each line and angle and ridge were now and eternally yours to restudy and marvel. "Hey, uh, almost forgot."

He reached into his front left pocket. "I, um, kept carrying it around thinking I'd see you somewhere. Kinda dumb right?"

"Not dumb." You opened the tiny box, wound the handle until the spring felt tight and you could see the throngs prick the textured wheel, and it was one of those moments where you didn't see a gift in your hand. You simply saw his thought and sentiment manifested as a box of wood that sung a tune.

All the things Jungkook wanted to give you, the sun and the moon and the entire universe were not his to give. So for now, he settled for this music box and there would be a day when he would collect each celestial being and place them right into your hands. Maybe then, he would feel less of a debt for possessing such a love like yours.

"This is... I love it. Thank you, Jungkook." You smiled, but it was motivated in the hopes he would smile back. You thought he deserved that much, at least. And he did.

"Sooooo... Can I tell Seokjin that you're actually in love with me and that he sucks ba-"

"Um, absolutely not!" As always, his crudeness and slight inability to remain mature for too long only wedged you deeper in love.

So, terribly in love. Your state of constant craving for Jeon Jungkook had been left barren. That desolate, solitary province was no longer yours to take residence in.

You had a home now. And you had no need to crave Jungkook anymore. He was right here, holding you.

“I love you.” 

“I love you too.”

a/n: okay, cry with me.... these two.... such hopeless saps for each other i'm here for it. final destination is simp city... also (spoiler) it is completely canon that irene and seokjin bond over their mutual heartbreaks and get to smitten hehehe. anyway, my loves i hope you enjoyed this finale as much as i enjoyed writing it!!! it was a short but heartfelt journey with these two and i will miss their idiocy sm. thank u for your endless support i love u all!!! <3

#bangtanarmynet #ficswithluv #btsgoldnet #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts angst #bts fluff #bts writing #jungkook x reader #jungkook fanfic #jungkook bestfriend!au #jungkook angst #bts series #jungkook bestfriendstolovers!au #jungkook series #constant craving #rubycoast

[cindersnightmare]

slow dancing in the dark (kaider au)

part ten

summary: cinder is the palace mechanic and kai is the prince of the eastern commonwealth. even though they could never be together, they start a secret relationship.

(sorry this took 20 million years to write sdjmgfnsjdfk)

***

the following week after the emperor’s death, the palace was chaos. a funeral had passed, preparations for the upcoming coronation and ball were being worked on at every moment, and the search for a cure was in more demand than ever. no one wanted to see another beloved leader die to the horrible disease. 

the city was a mix of grief, worry, and excitement. as much as the commonwealth loved kai, they worried he wouldn’t be a good leader at such a  young age, and they didn’t want to see him crack under the pressure. they were hoping the ball would be a break from the darkness. they wanted a night of fun to forget all of the tragedy that their country had been through. 

kai was a nervous wreck, of course, and was terrified of the upcoming events. all he wanted to do was lay in bed for days and block out any responsibilities. unfortunately, that was a luxury he couldn’t have. he was going to be emperor in the next few days, whether he was ready or not, and nothing could change that. 

while everyone was planning the coronation and ball, kai was coming up with a secret plan. he had to make sure cinder would be able to come to the palace without getting caught by her retched family, and that would require some help. so he ended up telling torin he wanted to bring his “friend” to the ball for his healing and comfort. although his advisor was weary of letting an employee be the special guest, he allowed it once he saw kai’s puppy eyes. 

he had his stylist get cinder’s outfit and store it in his bedroom. he hoped she would like it, but he knew she would pick cargo pants over a dress any day. cinder was going to have to tell adri that she was needed at the palace late so she could stay and get ready. everything was coming together, and kai really hoped it would work. it was the one thing he was looking forward to. if everything went well, then they had a chance to really being together, and he wanted that more than anything. 

***

after another day of dreadful meetings, kai was drained. all he could think about was how he was somehow on the same level as these older, powerful leaders, and he would be discussing serious topics and problems with them continuously now. it was weird thinking about how just years go, he was a curious kid, trying to listen and sit it on his dad’s meetings with the same people. 

it was getting late, and he didn’t want to feel sad anymore, so he threw on a hoodie and snuck out of the palace. even though he got a stern yelling from torin last time he did this, he didn’t really care, he needed to see cinder. 

as excited as he was, he was still filled with dread at seeing the phoenix tower apartments. he hated cinder living there. the image of her sad bedroom and the stories of adri’s abuse haunted him, and his patience was the only thing keeping him from taking her away from all of it. 

kai sent a comm to cinder before walking into the lobby, not wanting to freak her out this time. he also didn’t want to risk waking the step monster. 

hey, i’m outside your building. can you sneak down here?

a few moments went by before his portscreen chimed with a response.

you’re clinically insane...i’m coming down.

her message made him laugh as he waited by the front doors. he saw cinder in the lobby, wearing his hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. kai smiled at the sight. she opened the door and waved him inside, ushering for him to move quickly. he walked towards her and glanced around, seeing the office man sleeping at the front desk again.

“are you crazy?” cinder whispered. grabbing his hand and leading him to the back staircase. 

“according to your comm, yes.” he laughed, not even questioning where she was taking him as they stepped down into a dark room. she flicked on a small  light and the metal of tools and work tables dimly gleamed back at them. “is this your secret hideout?” 

cinder shrugged, “you could say that.” after she spoke, they faced each other, their smiles softening. it had been a while since they saw each other in person. the past week had been a mess, and they had both been missing each other like crazy, hoping for an opportunity to communicate without using their portscreens. “what brings you here at two in the morning?”

kai thought of where he was an hour ago, alone in his bed, feeling something missing. his heart ached and he wanted to bring it home. “i just needed you, that’s all.” he spoke with a gentle smile. 

she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into an embrace. a sigh of content left his lips, and while he felt lighter already, nothing could stop the weight of grief and uncertainty sitting on his chest. “you’ve got me, kai. always.” cinder whispered. 

his fingers wove themselves into her hair, holding her close. he started to think of the ball, of dancing with her in front of everyone, all eyes on them. an idea popped in his head and he began to grin. “cinder?”

“hm?”

“do you know how to dance?” 

cinder’s face fell, looking scared and embarrassed in an instant. “oh my stars, i don’t know how to dance.” her eyes were wide with panic as she spoke.

kai laughed and put one hand on her waist, the other grabbing hers and holding it. “it’s okay, i’ll teach you.” he almost laughed at her expression, but he refrained, instead focusing on getting her in the correct position. “you don’t have to be nervous.” he teased.

“i’m worried i’ll crush your foot with my metal one.” she frowned, looking at the floor. 

kai let out a little laugh. “you won’t. now come on, dance with me.” 

he started to guide her, stepping back and forth, taking it slow. it was proving difficult to dance in a crowded, dim basement but they were making it work. she stumbled a little and he helped her get back into it. she still seemed nervous, like she was sure she wasn’t good enough. but as they kept going, she eased into it, starting to memorize the steps and follow kai smoothly. 

“see? it’s not so bad.” kai whispered as he brought her body closer to his. 

“because you’re doing most of the work.” she giggled, resting her head on his chest, listening to the soothing sound of his heartbeat. she wondered how many times kai had to dress up, pick a dancing partner, and waltz across the palace floor all night. probably hundreds, and he would do it a thousand times more in his reign. she hoped everything would work out and he wouldn’t have to pick another partner ever again. 

he rested his head on hers, trying to get as close as possible without messing up their progress. he knew they wouldn’t be able to dance like this at the ball, it would be far too inappropriate, so he took advantage of the moment. as he held her, his heart rushed with warmth, replacing the dark emotions that burdened him all week. “cinder?” 

“yeah?” she picked her head up and looked at him. her beautiful brown eyes met his, that small yet alluring smile appearing, and he swore he saw heaven.

his breath caught in his throat, the words resting on the tip of his tongue. every time he looked at her, he knew, but he didn’t say it. before everything started changing, he was afraid that he would lose her, that saying what he felt would make it all too difficult. but now they had this great scheme to stay together forever, to eventually walk down the aisle, to rule a country together. he allowed himself to be truthful and certain now. 

“i love you.” 

the words filled the silent air as cinder’s eyes widened. he wondered if she ever heard that sentence before. the dancing stopped and she froze, looking shocked. kai hoped he didn’t scare her, knowing he had done enough of that with his marriage and ball proposals. 

slowly, she seemed to come back to earth, and that smile reappeared. “i love you, too.” 

her voice captured him and he brought her back to him, kissing her passionately. it was like their bond had intensified, like a string that couldn’t break, something that would be with them for the rest of their lives. 

once they separated and let air slip between them, cinder laughed. “what?” kai asked. 

she shook her head, “we’re crazy. absolutely insane.” 

he nodded, “yeah, you’re right, but we’re gonna make it work.” 

***

get it...? they slow danced in the dark!!! :)))) 

next part is going to be the ball!

taglist: @strawberry-seraph @duskietapp @winterrhayle @stylampa @wwwwyamd @whyiask @i-swear-im-google @phobidawg @plain-jane-mclain @princesspri222 @marialovesdean @maradovan @moon-swoon @nodrianbcyes @janisarkisian @cyborg-martyr-wolf-monarch @cinderswrench @cindersassasin @cerenoya @idkchatie @half-heaven @dawniebb @scxundress @queen-of-self-love @quietintrovertt @invisiblebobs @lavenderbloo @healing-winston-pratt @hearing-in-color @horton-hears-a-who @cosmicnovaflare @a-salting-the-world @angstycatthatlikestea @poptart-boy @grad-school-fool @gatorademachinegun @girlfriendisthemoon @honey-harper-official @coralsclato @bookishfangirl14 @bakergirl13 @addies-invisible-life @f-r-o-p @disco-funk-and-soul09 @lani-sleeps @daydreaming-optimist @the-sunflowerstar @mistydacat @salt-warrior @love-and-anarchy-au

(let me know if u want to be added or taken off <3

#kaider #kaider au #kaider fanfic #kaider fanfiction #kai #emperor kai #prince kai #kaito #cinder x kai #cinder #linh cinder #selene blackburn #tlc #tlc fanfic #tlc au #marissa meyer #slow dancing in the dark #slow dancing in the dark au #the lunar chronicles #the lunar chronicles fanfic #the lunar chronicles au #cindersnightmare #usermaven

[machinegunbun]

🤘-

What about reader is the manager/assistant and fucks up some bug career opportunity for them?

Mistakes can allways happen but that was something really big

Maybe even gets fired for it?

Fucked It +

TW?: Mostly angst but theres some very slight smut with readers S/O

A/N: Not to age the writing but Im writing this as colson tweets that he’s gonna play at the halftime show in the next few years. S/O= Significant Other. I wanted to keep it kinda gender neutral cause bi people exist i dunno. 

Word count:1.8k A little longer than a blurb, but just as dialogue-y

This year had been stressful, to say the least. There was the release of tickets to my downfall, and along with that the cover scandal, the bloody valentine music video, downfalls high, the snl episode. It was like every second of your day was filled with something, you rarely got the chance to spend time with your S/O.

That’s right, you had an S/O. Being Colson’s manager wasn’t your entire existence, although you’d seemed to have forgotten that recently. Their name is Devin, and they are not very happy with you.

They’d broken down in tears your first full night home, telling you how under appreciated they had felt while you were away. Devin had a life of their own too, though, and considering the pandemic at hand had chosen to go stay with their family to avoid the covid hot spot that was LA. You understood, and as much as you hated to admit it you barely even realized they were gone. You didn’t know what that meant, but you knew whatever it meant wasn’t anything good for your relationship, but, you loved them and you wanted to recreate that spark.

You wanted to put work into them, and you, and most importantly your relationship. You’d gotten through the emotions, but as for the spark there was only so much you could do thousands of miles away. So, you decided to put in the work and devise a plan. Your plan started about an hour and a half ago, beginning with a shower and ending with your favorite lipstick.

You love Devin and you want nothing more than to wrap them up in a soft blanket and kiss them on the forehead and take them on picnics, but you also wanted them to look at you and touch themselves. You could do one of those things in your current situation, and you felt both would help to replenish your spark.

You looked good too, dressed in your lingerie with your hair all done. You felt so unbelievably sexy just looking at yourself in the mirror, you wished they were here to witness it.

You stood in the doorway of your bedroom, your LED lights set to red, your phone set to start recording in 

3…

2…

1…

You tried your best to pose sexily in the small frame, arching your back and playing with your hair, slowly slinking down the wall. You were sure when you sent this Devin would be calling you within seconds. You checked the video, editing it to the length you liked and saving it to your camera roll.

Butterflies began fluttering in your stomach as you looked at your message app. You had seen Devin in so long, what if the spark had really gone? What if they didn’t want you anymore? Or what if they just didn’t want you right now, what if this wasn’t the right thing to do?

You took a deep breath, looking yourself in the mirror and quickly clicking through your messages, sending it before you could think too much and clicking your phone off. You moved from the bathroom, moving to your bed, staring at your phone and waiting patiently for a response.

After thirty minutes you gave up, too nervous to check if they’d seen it. You were cool.

Well, you were cool now that you had cried and and picked yourself apart piece by piece, ending up on the couch in a heap of blankets eating a family bag of your favorite chips to yourself. Family guy played on the TV, the episode only really meant to drain out the noise of your thoughts, and momentarily the bling of your phone. You would’ve missed it entirely if it weren’t for the flickering of your flashlight that you’d enabled to make sure you didn’t.

You rushed from your comfy blanket fort, spilling your chips on the way, your hand wrapping tightly around your phone. You turned it around, seeing that the notification that had popped up was only from Dylan, the guy that got Colson a place at the halftime show. 

Work, great, the thing that started this all. Was this the universe telling you it was over? You read on.

It simply said “Call me.”

Your eyebrow raised, considering waiting until tomorrow. You opened your messages, seeing that you had accidentally sent him the video of you in your lingerie. Fuck, thats why Devin hadn’t responded.

You opened his contact, calling him quickly, each ring feeling like needles being inserted into your brain.

“So I hope you understand why we wouldn’t want to be associated with that unprofessionalism.” He said, you’d zoned out through his lecture

“I understand, I do, but I hope you’d be willing to reconsider as this was a mistake on my part and not Colson’s. And seeing as this isn’t public I hope we can just brush this all under the rug and forget it ever-”

“I hear you, but I don’t think that will be possible. Mistake or not it was unprofessional on so many different levels

“But, sir-” You tried, your fingers thumbing over the buttons of the remote to mute the tv.

“It’s over, I’m afraid.” He responded, a beeping noise signalling the call had ended

Oh, nicer, you thought sarcastically, it wasn’t the universe after all, it was the manager.

Tossing your phone on the couch beside you, you retreated to your blanket fort, unmuting the TV.

Colson and the boys had been looking forward to performing at the halftime show since you’d met them. They’d been so excited when you told them you’d got them a spot. Although it was the last thing you wanted to do right now, you knew you had to break the news to Colson. 

You stared at your phone, willing yourself to reach over and call him, eventually drifting off into an unsatisfying sleep.

“Oh good, you’re here! Okay, so I was thinking for the halftime show-” Colson began, but you cut him off before he could continue

“Oh, yeah, about that.” You say, rubbing your head in hopes it would soothe the dull ache that had begun to rear its ugly head. You opened your eyes in time to watch the excitement drop from Colson’s face.

“I…” You began, not sure how to start “I fucked it.” You began to laugh, taking a moment to acknowledge how ridiculous the situation had really been.

“What do you mean?” He asks, knitting his eyebrows together in confusion.

“Devin and I are going through a bit of a rough patch with them being away and all, so I decided to try and,” You made a vague shimmy movement with your shoulders “spark things up a bit. You know the silhouette challenge on tik tok? I did that, but I got nervous when I sent the video and I was on the couch for like hours crying too scared to see if they even looked at it, next thing I know I’m getting texted by Dylan asking me to call him.” You paused, partly for dramatic effect and partly to let yourself laugh. You buried your face in your hands, Colson watching in amusement, eager for the end of your clearly hilarious story.

“I accidentally sent him my nudes. It was so fucking embarassing, oh my god!” You finish, looking up from your hands to realize no one else seemed amused.

“What’s that got to do with the halftime show?” Rook questioned.

“Oh, right.” You’d completely lost track in the midst of your rambling “He said it was completely unprofessional and he wasn’t interested in working with us.”

Colson remained silent for a moment, looking over to the other boys before responding “He isn’t interested in working with you.” Your eyebrows furrowed at this, looking between the boys..

“What’s that mean?” 

“This is the gig of our lifetime. I’ve- We’ve wanted to play the halftime show since… forever. This was our one chance and because of you we got booted out. And you were laughing about it.”

“I’m sorry, it was a genuine accident, I thought you’d find it funny. Some corporate guy saw my tits ‘cause my relationship is failing, if I don’t laugh I cry.”

 “You’re the one who sent him the nudes. This is your fuck up.”

“Yeah, okay. But I work for you, so by association he won’t work with us.”

“Then you aren’t a part of ‘us’ anymore.”

“Colson, seriously? It was a fucking accident. You’re being ridiculous.”

“Watch your tone, I think you’re forgetting you work for me. I’m a nice guy, but this isn’t my shit to deal with.”

“I’m sorry.” You repeated, your voice lowering. It was easy to forget Colson was your boss, he never treated you like an employee. There was more respect between the two of you than any boss/employee relationship you’d ever seen before. You’d never even seen him mad before today. You were genuinely lucky to have had this experience, to think that it was about to come to an end broke your heart.

“Is sorry going to get us this gig back?” The question was rhetorical, but you shook your head “Then I’m sorry, I can’t let this pass me up because of something you did.” Colson says, staring you down. You stood like a statue in your place, unsure whether or not you should leave. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife.

You took it upon yourself to make the decision to turn and leave, driving to the nearest gas station, where you sat in your car, crying in the parking lot.

Everything was fine and in the matter of a week it had all gone to shit. How did this happen?

You were in a happy relationship, and now they were living with their parents for who knows why and telling you they felt neglected. Your career was going amazing and you’d ruined it completely with one mistext.

You started your car back up, settling on the hope that maybe Colson and Dylan would come to their senses, and come Monday morning you would still have a job.

#mgk #mgk angst #mgk fanfic #mgk x reader #machinegunkelly #machinegunkelly angst #machinegunkelly fanfic #machinegunkelly x reader #Colson baker #colson baker fanfic #colson baker x reader #colson baker angst

[autism-asks]

Hi, im sorry if this has been answered before, I couldn’t find it anywhere on your page though, but how do I go about getting an official dx?

I just did a full psych evaluation a couple weeks ago but they didn’t diagnose me for bs reasons, so I want to seek a second opinion. This evaluation was recommended to me by vocational rehab, so I was kind of streamlined into it and didn’t do any legwork.

What do I have to do to go about getting a second opinion? I’m a young adult and living in Florida.

Also what are your best tips for going about this once I get an appointment with someone? I’ve been trying for this dx for years so I really need to work very hard to convince them and need all the advice I can get

Oh, I just sent in about how to get a pro dx in Florida, I also should note that I don’t have a general practitioner so I can’t ask for a referral through one of those. I have a psychiatrist but she doesn’t believe that im autistic Bc I tend to mask around doctors

So I’m from Texas & state laws about healthcare can be very different but I’ll try to give as accurate an answer as I can.

First, and this sucks to say, a lot of people might not be willing to do another evaluation. I know some people might (and I have friends who have gotten second evaluations) but I didn’t personally get one. I even went through a process of being referred to a specialist by my college but as soon as she found out I had already been assessed, she backed out. So first make sure whoever you want to go to is even willing to do a second evaluation.

After that, getting another evaluation kinda all boils down to two big things:

1) Your insurance plan

2) Specialists near you (and this also kinda has to do with insurance but I’ll get to that)

Basically, a lot of what you can do depends on your insurance plan. For example, some plans don’t require a referral. In that case, you could just find a person and go to them. How you pay also depends on your insurance. If you have the money and are not required to get a referral, you could just go to a person and pay them out of pocket to assess you again. This can cost a couple thousand dollars (or more) if I remember correctly. Some plans don’t require a referral but depending on who you go to the insurance company might help pay. This depends on the person you go to and what insurance plans they accept/if your insurance is considered out of network, whether your insurance will pay for an out of network person, whether the person will do a sliding scale charge, and probably some other things.

If your plan requires a referral (which it most likely does since I think that’s the most common thing) then your options may be more limited. So the person in charge of referring you might get your input. Which means you need to research who you would want to go to—will cover that in a bit. That research should include (again unless you have the money for out of pocket covering the whole cost) whether whoever you want will take your insurance. Also, sometimes if you have a general practitioner they can refer you instead of a psychiatrist. So if you can’t convince your psychiatrist to take you seriously, you could try a general practitioner. I know that’s how a friend got his ADHD diagnosis.

With your psychiatrist you could perhaps try explaining that you mask really well around doctors and you feel like this applies to the relationship between the two of you. And then push for a referral despite their opinion. You don’t need a doctor’s permission to get a second opinion. If you need a referral and your current doctor isn’t giving you one, find someone who respects you enough to trust your opinion of your own brain and neurotype.

After all that I highly suggest calling your insurance company (your insurance card should have a number you can call) and finding out from them whether or not they’ll cover an assessment and what your part of the payment will be. Some companies/plans will not cover adult evaluations. And I’m also not sure if they covered it in the past, whether or not they’ll cover a second evaluation.

Now onto advice about who you should go to. I highly recommend doing a LOT of research (again if the person referring you gives you input which they should in my opinion) on who to go to. Not everyone will evaluate adults. And not everyone who says they’ll evaluate adults are actually willing to give you a diagnosis despite saying they evaluate adults. I am a good example of that. The person I went to said she would evaluate adults, then after we paid like $2000+ on an evaluation she gave a whole list of terrible reasons why she wouldn’t diagnose me which included that if I were still in grade school she would have diagnosed me but since I’m an adult she didn’t think it was necessary (despite me being there of my own volition explicitly to get a diagnosis).

I’m not trying to scare you I’m just trying to stress research. And finding the right person can be hard. If you’re able to (or you have someone who you trust who is able to) I suggest asking whoever you might see what their stance on diagnosing adults is. And maybe some other questions (like how they account for gender and race and other things like that in the diagnostic process). Don’t be afraid to interview them before going through the evaluation process. They’re being paid a lot of money and you don’t want to be taken advantage of.

I know finding a good specialist can be hard & you might not be able to find the perfect person. These are just suggestions.

Once you finally have an appointment, there are some tips we can give to help but other than being really picky (if you can) about who you go to they may or may not be helpful.

Some suggestions we and others have made include answering questions in the evaluation based not necessarily how you feel in that moment, but based on your best recollection of how you are in general or even at your worst. For example if they ask if you feel comfortable in large groups, don’t answer how you might answer if you’re in a good mood. Answer how you generally feel or how you’d feel on a bad brain day. Or if they try to figure out if you’re good at reading facial cues, don’t answer based on how good you are at reading cues of those closest to you (cuz due to practice and repetition, you might be good at that), answer based on meeting strangers or acquaintances.

Basically, do your best to answer how you would if you weren’t masking. Those are just some examples of how to get around ingrained masking. That’s probably the biggest piece of advice I can give you as someone who has tried and failed to get a professional to diagnose me as a young adult.

I really hope this helps and if you want more advice or I didn’t get to a part of your question you really cared about, please feel free to follow up and we’ll do our best to answer!

-Mads

#second opinion #doctor mention #evaluation #us specific #mod mads #anonymous

[amelialincoln]

Electric Love

im sorry to those who were expecting an amelink fic. i guess what else would you expect (im sorry). but i also really enjoy reading Marecal fics from Red Queen and tbh I've been loving amelink this season but the last two episodes have left me feeling a bit disappointed with the lack of cutesy, romantic shit that i live for and i’ve just been feeling unmotivated. so i hope some of you can enjoy this fic. i know it isn’t a huge fandom but it’s a wholesome one so maybe i can find some marecal shippers in the greys anatomy fandom :)

Mare’s eyes shone with amusement as Rafe tumbled back into the mud. They both were panting and the sky swirled above them, tainted with purple and green.

“That was pathetic.” She grinned.

“Hey, cut me some slack, I’ve been training with Ella for the last six months and, as powerful as she is, she’s no combat fighter.” Despite being exhausted, he wiped the blood from his chin and green lighting sparked at his fingertips. “Let’s put the physical fighting to rest and level out the playing field a bit.” Mare’s expression darkened and she tried to hide her reaction. The training she’d done ever since she and Cal had started their training camp in Norta had been minimal. Cal had tried to pass off all royal responsibilities after the war but the palace had too much of a perfect training arena to pass up. They’d kept saying they would build their own centre in the Westlakes region so Mare could be closer to home, but the amount of newblood prodigies they’d discovered since they’d started the camp was too impressive to leave behind. And despite everything, she’d rarely used her abilities lately. A couple weeks back she’d gotten out of control. She wasn’t sure where it had come from but she’d never experienced anything like it. Ever since she could sense something different. Something that was causing an imbalance inside of her. She’d mentioned none of it to Cal, simply asking if she could work on combat instead of ability training. He’d showed some confusion but didn’t press it, assuming she was wanting to brush up on fighting skills. “Come on, Mare,” Rafe joked, “are you scared?”

“No.” She found herself yearning for the feeling of electricity coursing through her veins. She was surprised by how easily she summoned it after three weeks of suppression. She felt herself wondering if she’d created the whole situation in her head. Rafe shot a web of green energy at her to bring her back to reality.

“You’re distracted,” he observed.

“Never,” she replied. A bolt of lighting hit the ground beside him, causing him to jump. Rafe grinned and the hill lit up with green.

Mare was full of exhilaration, summoning lighting from the thundering sky above in ways that she’d forgotten she was capable of. If she were fighting Ella they probably would’ve torn the mountain apart by now but Rafe easily absorbed the purple bolts into the webs of his own and they reflected back up into the sky. Mare dodged the ones he sent her way, letting them sizzle into the grass behind her. Rain began to pour down on them and the purple bolts of lighting were coming down quickly and sporadically.

“Mare, cut it out with the rain,” Rafe yelled over the thundering noise. Mare looked up into the sky nervously, she hadn’t asked for the rain. She noticed a swirling pattern of lighting that was churning in the clouds, one she hadn’t called upon.

“I didn’t--” she started before she was knocked to the ground, a green light washed over her and she was left tingling. Rafe rushed over to her.

“I thought you were paying attention, sorry.”

“I probably deserved that,” she muttered, wiping mud off her cheeks.

“Call it off, let's head inside.” Mare nodded, wishing the clouds to disperse and the lighting to suppress. The storm only got more intense, she could feel the hair stand up on the back of her neck, Rafe seemed to notice it too. “Mare, call it off!” Lightning stuck too close to the pair, leaving the ground sizzling with purple, hot flames. Mare was suddenly happy for the rain. “What are you doing?” He yelled. Mare felt a wave of nausea roll over her. The hair on the back of her neck stood up again. “Mare!” She could hear the fear in his voice. He cupped her face in his hands. “Focus!” Mare felt her entire body shake as the rain stopped and static electricity was sucked out of the air. She fell back in exhaustion, her body trembling in sweat. “Jesus.” Rafe glanced around at the damage that their fight had caused.

“We should head back,” Mare grimaced. 

They had a silent journey home. Usually they would run but Mare seemed so exhausted that Rafe hadn’t mentioned it. The trek seemed about a million hours long but finally they said their goodbyes as they neared the entrance of the kingdom.

“Tell Ella and Tyton that I say hi,” she mentioned softly.

“I will,” he promised, studying his friend with concern.

“Thanks for demonstrating at camp today, I know it meant a lot to the kids.”  

“No worries,” he shrugged. “You should come and train with us though. It’s easy to get out of practice when there’s no other electricons to drill with.” He was worried he’d overstepped but was relieved when Mare nodded in response.

“Hey, you look like you got a good workout. I could see the storm you created from here.” Cal embraced her tightly as she let herself into their room. “You okay?” He asked as she winced.

“Yeah, just sore,” she muttered, trying to ignore his confusion as she pushed passed him.

“What’s wrong?” He pressed, sensing her anger.

“I’m just out of practice.” She stepped into their bathroom, turning on the shower.

“I’ve noticed.” He ignored the glare she shot him as he sat on the toilet seat while she undressed and stepped under the stream of water, covered in mud. “You haven’t really been training.” Mare sighed, watching the mud swirl off her in pools of grey. She stepped out of the shower once the water turned clear and was surprised to find Cal still waiting with a towel. “Mare,” he breathed, tracing his hand along her ribcage. She was covered in jagged burns. “What happened?”

“They don’t hurt.” She shrugged, which was a lie.

“Did Rafe hit you?”

“It was an accident, I wasn’t paying attention,” she grimaced as he wrapped her in the towel. Cal didn’t know Mare to be the type of person to not pay attention while fighting. If anything she was more aware of her surroundings than anyone he knew.

“I’ll tell Sara to come up.” He walked out of the room before she could protest, as he knew she would.

They were sitting on the bed when Sara arrived. Mare was draped in one of Cal’s t-shirts that seemed to be drowning her. She couldn’t manage to put on any restrictive clothing without grimacing in pain. Cal had thrown the shirt at her after watching her sort through her clothes for too long, which she’d pulled on happily.

“Cal,” Sara greeted the obviously concerned brunette as she followed him into the living room. He and Mare had built the apartment over the training centre, not wanting to live in the palace considering that sleeping there caused them both to have nightmares every time they tried to close their eyes. She eyed Mare, knowing immediately that something was off. She’d barely seen the young woman over the last couple of weeks and had been trying not to worry after hearing whisperings around the palace that she’d been barely eating. Despite the couple no longer living in the palace, they both usually had no problem requesting food from the kitchen. Apparently Mare was an awful cook, to which Sara wasn’t surprised. Mare lifted her shirt to reveal the blisters that were beginning to form in swirling patterns on her skin. Cal seemed to flinch. Sara was surprised by his reaction to seeing his girlfriend in pain, no doubt after experiencing it many times before. Mare sighed as Sara’s hands began to soothe her skin. The tingling of the burns began to diminish and the soreness in her lower back had also begun to suppress. She glanced up to see that Sara had paused, her palms hovered in place.

“Mare, have you noticed any changes lately?” She questioned softly. Mare glanced at Cal who was eyeing her as he bit the skin on his fingertips.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. Sara ignored him, waiting for Mare to respond. Mare nodded slowly.

“I’ve felt out of control,” she replied so softly that Cal could hardly hear it. “I noticed it a couple of weeks ago so I stopped for a bit. Today when I was training with Rafe...it got bad.” Sara nodded, although what Mare had told her was not what she’d been expecting.

“Sara--” Cal started, his voice filled with worry.

“She’s pregnant,” she interrupted him. “Three weeks.” The room’s temperature climbed to what seemed like a thousand degrees and the lights above flickered. Sara couldn’t help but suppress an amused smile at their reactions. Mare burst into tears and the healer immediately removed her hands from the trembling girl’s stomach.

“Thank you, Sara,” Cal shifted awkwardly on his feet as she practically fled from the room. He took Mare into his arms rocking her slightly back and forth, it was rare that she cried and he hadn’t seen her bawl like this in what seemed like years. “Hey, Mare, it’s okay,” he tried.

“Cal, you don’t understand.” She wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to sit up. “What happened today scared me. I thought I was going to kill him.”

“What do you mean?” Cal asked, his voice was sympathetic as he rubbed her back in an attempt to comfort her, stealing occasional, curious looks at her stomach.

“It started a couple weeks ago,” she explained as he raised his eyebrows. “I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want to worry you. I was demonstrating for some of the newbloods and suddenly I felt everything pause, as if the lightning had slipped out of my grasp. It struck more powerfully than I’ve seen it, about ten meters away. The kids were impressed because they thought I was controlling it but I wasn’t. After that I decided to take a break. I was scared that it would happen again and hurt someone. Today was...bad.”

“You think someone else is controlling it when you slip?” He asked. “Or controlling you?” 

“I don’t know,” she shuddered.

“You think it might be the baby?” He added tentatively.

“I doubt a fetus could…” She trailed off. “I mean, I have no idea,” she finally confessed.

“Can we talk about this? Can you tell me how you’re feeling?” Mare bit her lip uncomfortably. 

“I should’ve noticed sooner. I’ve been nauseous and been feeling more tired than usual. My cycle has always been irregular since I lost it in the war,” she admitted. “We’ve just been so busy.”

“When I’ve brought up having kids in the past you’ve never seemed enthusiastic.”

“I don’t think I’d be a good mom,” she confessed. “We also both get our fair share of PTSD episodes.” Cal grimaced at that. “I just have never felt ready to bring a child into this world. That’s why I’ve always been so careful about taking those pills Farley gave me. I don’t know what happened.”

“That makes sense,” he assured her before adding, “we’d have a pretty cool kid,” 

“Yeah, we would,” Mare breathed, placing a tentative hand on her stomach. “Gisa’s gonna freak.” 

“Your Mom would want us to move to the Westlakes immediately,” he joked. Mare smiled at the thought but Cal could sense the worry in her eyes. “Hey, if you don’t want to have it, I’ll support you.” To his surprise Mare shook her head.

“I love you, Cal. I know how much you want this and I see how good you are with the children at camp. Even though it’s not great timing and it might just be the hormones, I don’t want to make a choice that I’ll regret.”

“So we’re having a baby?” Cal asked, trying to conceal his excitement.

“I guess so?” Mare wiped another tear with Cal’s massive t-shirt sleeve. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without training for nine months.”

“You think it all has something to do with the baby?”  

“Three weeks works out pretty well with when I first noticed the change.” She nodded. “Our baby seems like she’s going to be a bit like her mom.”

“Her?” Cal asked, grinning ear to ear.

“I have a hunch,” Mare shrugged, laughing as Cal gently pushed her back against the mattress and covered her face in kisses.

“Nah he’ll be burning your insides in no time. The lightning thing was just a fluke.”

“Does that actually happen?” Mare froze.

“God no,” he laughed. “Though Maven and I found out about our abilities pretty young. Our parents pressed the testing on us pretty early. They wanted to start our training as soon as possible. I don’t think the palace staff appreciated unpredictable five year old fire wielders.”

“Oh god,” Mare shook her head at the thought as Call pulled the duvet over her. “Cal it’s nine.” 

“You said you’ve been feeling tired,” he said firmly.

“Tomorrow is Sunday, there’s no camp anyways.” 

“Perfect, you can sleep in too. My baby is tired.” Mare rolled her eyes at that, knowing she’d have a long nine months ahead of her.

“Fine, but you have to come to bed as well,” she bargained.

“I told Julian--”

“Nope, I’m actually carrying your child which makes me more important than Julian.” She smiled as she watched frustration pass over Cal’s face.

“Fine,” he finally sighed, swifty removing his shirt in one swift motion and wrapping his arms around her. Mare yawned, allowing herself to finally relax into their bed. “If you think you’re fighting combat you’re insane.” Cal’s voice pulled her out of sleep.

“If you think I’m going to sit on my ass all day you’re insane,” she shrugged, rolling over. Cal sighed as he heard Mare’s breathing begin to deepen.

“I know.”

#marecal #redqueen #red queen #marecalfanfic #marecal fanfic #broken throne #war storm #glass sword #marebarrow #mare barrow #tiberias calore #diana farley #victoria aveyard #red queen fanfiction

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression, Ep 41 - 'Antique' displayed in showcase. Its true identity is..

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru with this week's episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome again. Ok, should we get straight on with it?

J: Yeh, shall we?

T: Yeah.

J: Just get started quickly.

K: Ok, Ojikyun... (*see last episode*)

T: Yeh, Ojikyun.

J: I'll try my hardest.

T: Ojikyun Joe.

J: Ok, well, this is today's news. 'Antique displayed in showcase, its real identity is..?'　A photo posted to Twitter of a shop's showcase is getting reactions like, 'I had to look twice!', and 'I was fooled!'. The person who posted the photo was walking the streets, when suddenly they saw a shop with a showcase containing numerous pots. But when this person had a closer look, they were amazed. They read the explanation card and discovered the pots were actually Baumkuchen! The pots, made in various sizes, resemble the real finish and shape of an actual flower vase. The shop, named Villon, is a patisserie located in Sakura Shinmachi in Tokyo, and was established in 1965. These Baumkuchen made in the shape of pottery go by the name of 'Grand Villion', and the shop owner says they were born out of an idea to express the beauty of pottery though cakes. The shop also sells many other products, but people who have seen the photos online have been mistaking the cakes for real pots one after another.

So I think if you have a search online, you'll be able to find the images, but it really is Baumkuchen which looks exactly like a pot.

T: Absolutely.

K: Yeh, for sure.

J: What do you think about this?

K: Its incredible.

T: It is, yeh.

J: Yeh, it is.

T: It is amazing.

J: Yeah. I wonder if they sell a lot of these?

K: Can you buy these online?

J: I wonder if you can?

K: Just by looking, it seems like you order it in store.

J: These look like they are probably difficult to deliver.

K: Right.

J: I feel like it would break during delivery.

T: Yeah. But peope are buying these and taking them home as souvenirs.

J: Yeh, using Baumkuchen to make a pot...

T: Won't it become really well-known?

J: Yeah, it will. Its like making curry into the shape of poo as a kid...What? Didn't you do that?

T: Haha

T, K: No

J: Didn't you ever make curry into the shape of poo and offer it to your friends in elementary school?

K: Haha, no.

J: Its only me?? I bet some people did *points to camera*

T: They didn't, I'm sure they didn't, haha. No-one's gonna fall for you with that.

K: Haha

J: Im not Ojikyun material?

T: Not at all.

K: I thought everyone did that.

T: Hahaha

J: Isn't it a good trick? Making poo with curry? This is the same, just making a pot with Baumkuchen.

K: ??? *1

J: Is that a bit rude of me? Don't you make piled up poo with curry?

T: No! Haha.

K: How do you even make that with curry??

J: Its like, if the curry is left for a while, it congeals a bit, right?

K: The roux.

J: Yeah, kinda like the roux. I did it with that when i was a kid.

T: You did it with that? haha

J: I got into trouble with my parents for it.

K: Well, yeh.

T: Yeah, you would..playing with food.

J: ???*2

K: So thats why you're like this now.

J: No no no, ???*3. But anyway, its like an extension of that, what Villon is doing.

K: Its amazing. The cake at the bottom looks exactly like a real pot.

T: Yeah.

J: Yeh, they have uploaded the pics, but at a glance the Grand Villlon seems to cost close to twenty thousand yen.

T: Yeh, twenty thousand.

K: The big one, right?

J: Yeah, the big one.

T: Oh, the medium sized one costs ¥14,500.

J: Yeh, the big one is about ¥20,000. It would make someone very happy if you gave it as a gift.

T: Well, I wanna try it once.

J: Yeh, me too. Though it probably just tastes like regular Baumkuchen.

T: Of course, yeh.

J: So like, curry in the shape of poo tastes like curry, haha.

T: Hahaha

K: It reminds me of that thing, poo flavoured curry or curry flavoured poo?

J: The ultimate decision, right?

T: Oh, I remember that.

K: Which would you choose?

T: Probably curry flavoured..

K: Poo flavoured is impossible.

J: But the poo flavored one is still just curry.

K: Its ok to eat?

J: Yeah. 

K: So if its curry flavored poo, and you eat it will it have an  ???*4 influence?

J:..Yeh. It might be something sent from above. But anyhow, it tastes like curry.

K: So, its poo that doesn't harm your body?

J: No, well, the taste. The taste is curry...What are we talking about?? haha.

T: Right? haha

J, K: hahaha.

K: So for this, its like, is it a real pot?

T: Haha

K: Like, a pot that looks like Baumkuchen, or a Baumkuchen that looks like a pot?

J: I feel like this convo is getting off track.

K: That was your fault.

T: You went off on a tangent all of a sudden, haha.

J: Was it my fault? Im so sorry.

K: Should we buy one of these Baumkuchen?

J: Yeah, lets buy one.

K: Haha

T: Lets buy one.

K: We could eat it together.

J: Yeh, we could each put ¥5000 towards it or something.

T: Well, something like that.

K: Yeah.

T: It looks like this store is well established, I bet its delicious.

J: Its great though, established in 1965. The shop is older than me. Its been there for 55 years.

T: Thats amazing.

J: Definitively, lets try it as the TFoE team.

T: Should we ask Kami?

J: Ok. Kami?

Kami: Yes?

J: Oh, he's there, thats good.

T: Yeh, thats good. I thought he might be asleep.

Kami: Did you guys eat Baumkuchen as kids?

J: Well, honestly I was quite poor as a kid. We had a business in our house, but we suddenly went bankrupt and became poor very quickly. My Dad had a car, and he had about a million yen in debts with it, or fines.

T: When was this?

J: Oh, when I was in elementary school, so about forty years ago. So we didn't really eat fancy sweets like Baumkuchen...not that I can remember anyway.

T: Hm, as a small kid..

Kami: Um, I spent a lot of time in Nishinari in Osaka..Baumkuchen in not common there. (*Nishinari is know as a bit of a slum*)

K: Haha.

T: Im sure you can eat it there.

Kami: No, there didn't used to be any there.

T, K, J: Hahaha

J: So, you were in Nishinari, Kami?

Kami: For quite a long time actually.

J: Oh, really?

Kami: In Nishinari they really work hard making ocotopuses with sausages.

T: Haha

J: Haha. Octopuses with sausages?

T: You can buy that in the supermarket.

J: But its the same kind of idea right? Like making pots with Baumkuchen.

Kami: Also using carrots to make flowers.

J,T: Ahh, yeh, I see.

J: Kami, as soon as you enter, the conversion suddenly gets really common.

T: Yeah

Kami: It is the same idea.

K, T, J: Haha

J: Kami, you are pretty interesting.

T: Have you seen those things that are like deep fried Baumkuchen on skewers?

K: Oh yeh, I have.

T: Have you tried them?

J: I've seen deep fried ice cream, or fruit and stuff on a skewer, but not Baumkuchen.

T: Oh, there is that too.

K: Yeah, there is.

J: Ehh.

T: They definitely did this in Nishinari, right Kami?

K: Yeh, they did.

Kami: No, they didn't.

T: Haha

K: He's sure about that.

J: Yeh, he's certain.

T: He doesn't want to lose on this one.

J: But Kami, do you want to eat these pots made from Baumkuchen?

Kami: Well, yeh, to look at them, they look delicious.

J, T, K: Haha.

T: By the way Kami, how old were you when you first tried Baumkuchen?

Kami: I don't really want to tell you that.

J: Haha, its that much of a secret?

K: Maybe he doesn't remember?

J: Yeah, maybe.

Kami: But first, I want to try one of thier basic Baumkuchen.

J: Ah, more basic than this?

T:???6*

J: Ok, I got it. They do sell regular Baumkuchen too, so we'll get one of those for Kami, and we'll get one of the pot Baumkuchen for us.

T: Yeh, I'll eat that. 

Kami: You still have to share it though.

J, K: Hahaha

J: So you do want to eat it?

Kami: Yeah, I do.

J: You do? You should have been honest from the start. Well, I learned something today...that there is no Baumkuchen in Nishinari.

T: No, there is, there is. Will he get mad at me? There definitely is.

J: There definitely is? Well, we got to learn a bit about Kami's history.

T: You can kinda tell he probably lives in the west.

K: Well, he has a Kansai accent.

J: Yeh, he definitely has a Kansai accent. But now we know specifically about Nishinari.

T: I get the feeling he was just lurking there, as opposed to living.

K: He does seem kinda low class.

T: Yeh, he does.

J: Like, the kinda guy you want to avoid if at all possible, haha.

K: Ok, so, is that it?

J: So, we'll have to go and buy this sometime. Within the year?

T: Lets go asap.

K: Well, if they have to be reserved, we'll make a reservation.

J: Oh, yeah. Well, Kami wants to try a piece too.

K: Will Kami come down to join us then?

Kami: I do want to eat it.

J: No, well, what should we do? How can we give you it, Kami?

T: Right?

J: Kami?

Kami: Yes?

J: Yes?

K: hahaha

J: He doesn't know how to answer that, haha. Clearly, haha. He obviously doesn't know what to say! You're in the sky, right, Kami?

Kami: Thats right.

J: Yeh, so how can we get the cake to you?

Kami: Yeh, Im not sure, how could we? haha

J, K, T: Hahaha

J: He is totally stuck with this unexpected question.

T: What should we do then?

K: How about we look forward to what happens at that time?

J: Certainly!

K: Haha. Ok, well, Lets finish here for this week. Please subscribe. Thank you very much.

*1,2,3,4,5,6 Couldn't make out, usually due to too much background laughing.

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #tfoe #kaoru #薫 #baumkuchen

[chaeryybomb]

“8 hours and counting...” || l.dh

anon: “Can you do a best friends to lovers with nct haechan?”

a/n: here you go! thank you so much for requesting and I might’ve went a bit overboard with this,,,

pairing: lee haechan/lee donghyuck x gender neautral reader

genre: best friend to lovers!au, college!au, fluff, slight angst, haechan lowkey being a jerk, slow burnish?

featuring: mark lee, huang renjun, lee jeno, na jaemin and choi jongho

word count: 2.3k (oops)

summary: haechan misunderstood the situation thinking you had found a boyfriend and allows jealousy to take over and it is up to you, to slap— well, more like kiss him back into reality.

Haechan stared at the red iPhone in front of him. Well, more like he was glaring at the device. The reason was because he sent a text to his dear best friend, L/N Y/N, asking to meet up at the cafe because he was bored and he wanted to spend time with you.

He sent that text a few hours ago. 8 hours ago to be more precise, his brain taunted.

Sighing, he stood and paced around the room as endless scenarios ran through his head. Usually you would’ve answered his text within seconds after he sent it, the latest you ever took was 20 minutes! And that was because you were in a replacement class! Haechan knew your schedule like the back of his hand, of course he knew when you were free to text. And this was one of the moments, so where the hell was you?

Maybe you had a replacement class you forgot to mention. Haechan scratched their side of his head as he tried to remember if you had any classes cancelled in the past week. You didn’t. What if you were kidnapped?! His eyes widened at the thought. Oh no, should he make a police report? But you have to be missing for 24 hours before you’re “officially” a missing person and it’s only been 8 hours and 47 minutes... (Technically 8 hours felt like 8 years in Haechan’s book.)

Before he could think of even worse situations, Haechan’s phone rang out loud and the boy quickly dived to answer it. He groaned in disappointment once he read the contact name. It wasn’t you, just stupid Mark Lee. He swiped the accept button and raised the phone to his ear. “What?!” He asked annoyed.

“Woah, someone woke up on the wrong side of bed today,” Mark said on the other line.

“Hahaha, very funny Minhyung. What do you want?” Haechan replied with a sarcastic laugh.

“Jesus, I was going to ask if you want to go to the arcade today. Renjun said he’s going to beat your high score at Super Mario,” Mark explained.

At mention Renjun, Haechan could hear his voice yelling, “Be there or be square!” in the background.

Haechan swiped out of the call app and into his texts, his message was still on delivered. At least it was better than being left on read, right? But there was also a 80% chance of you being missing.

“Hello? Dude, you there?” Mark’s voice drew Haechan out his thoughts. Haechan shook his head, maybe the arcade would be a good distraction.

“Yeah, I’m in.”

The arcade was not a good distraction.

“Bro, are you okay?” Mark asked as he slung his arm over the younger one. “Renjun beat you in Super Mario. I repeat, you—“ he jabbed his finger at Haechan’s shoulder “—lost to Renjun!”

Renjun, who was sitting across from Mark, kicked his shin under the table. The older hissed in pain as he grabbed his leg. Mark glared at the boy in front of him, who’s now indulging himself in a conversation with Jeno, pretending like he didn’t stab Mark on the shin with the back of his heel.

Haechan mindlessly stirred his soda with the plastic straw, the whole time his mind was occupied with you, you and you. He made a mental note to blame you the next time he sees you. It’s stupid Y/N’s fault that he lost to Renjun in Super Mario! Ugh, now he has to play the damn game again just to get back his rightful place at the top of the leaderboard.

He looked at his phone the nth time since he entered the arcade. His lockscreen was empty from any notifications. No new messages or any missed calls. His wallpaper was a picture of him and you, who was on his back. It was a candid picture (courtesy of Jaemin) and the two of you were caught in the middle of laughing. He loves the picture, but right now it’s becoming a reminder that you have yet to reply to his message. It’s officially been 12 hours since his text. 12 hours and still nothing.

Suddenly, his ears perked up at the sound of someone’s laughter. Not just anyone, he knew whose laugh was that. It was yours. There’s no doubt that it was your laugh, he’s heard it his entire life. (And it’s also his favorite sound but he’d rather die than admit that.) Haechan sat up straighter and craned his neck, his eyes scanning the area for a certain person.

And there you were, standing in all your glory. His eyes lit up once he found you, but they immediately darkened in the next second. You weren't alone, beside you was another boy. A boy that he did not recognize. He saw you open your mouth to say something which resulted in the boy to ruffle your hair and sling his arm around your neck. The two walk past their table from the mini cafeteria and into the arcade. You didn’t even notice him.

Haechan’s fist tightened around the head of the chair as he watched you and the boy laugh together. Who the fuck was he and why the fuck was he with you? Mark seemed to notice where Haechan was staring and spoke up.

“Oh hey, isn’t that Y/N? HEY Y—MMPH!” Haechan swiftly moved to slap his hand over Mark’s mouth. He waited till you and the mystery boy disappeared into the aisle of arcade machines and finally slumped back into his seat.

“What the fuck was that for?!” Mark demanded and glared at the boy beside him.

Haechan rolled his eyes at the older and slumped back deeper into his seat, a pout on his lips. Mark paid no mind to him and just ruled it as one of his moments. While the other boys were laughing at Jeno choking on a french fry, a thousand thoughts were running through Haechan’s mind. The main one was who was the guy with you?

You couldn’t possibly have a boyfriend, right? No, you wouldn’t. You would’ve told him. That’s what best friends do, right? But that’s what he’s always going to be to you.

The best friend. He hates it.

Something’s wrong with Haechan. You’re sure of it. You stared at your phone in your hand as you reread his reply over and over again.

Haechan [8:33am]: hey you wanna go to the cafe for breakfast??

Haechan [8:35am]: hello???

Haechan [8:35am]: y/nnnnn

Haechan [8:36am]: don’t ignore meee :((

You [9:42pm]: omg im so so sorry

You [9:42pm]: im sorry hyuck i was at a family reunion :(((

You [9:43pm]: we can go to the cafe tomorrow if you’re still up for it!

Haechan [9:45pm]: i have plans tomorrow. maybe next time.

You [9:46pm]: alright..

First of all, Haechan would’ve popped off at you for replying to his texts so late and for ignoring him the whole day unintentionally. And secondly, he would’ve sent multiple texts at once, all caps and fighting emojis. Not just “i have plans tomorrow. maybe next time.”

“Who are you and what did you do to my best friend,” you mumbled to yourself. You sighed to yourself and placed your phone back on your desk. Maybe he’s really mad at you for ignoring him the whole day. In your defense, you were showing your cousin around town! You hadn’t checked your phone the entire day.

‘I should probably get him coffee as an apology tomorrow,’ you thought to yourself as you got ready for bed. Yeah, coffee sounds like a good plan.

You were wrong. It was not a good plan. It all started the next morning when you sent a good morning text to Haechan. He didn’t reply to you. You found it weird but you brushed it off. Maybe he was rushing off to school. He had a habit of waking up late anyways.

But the moment you saw him at campus, he immediately took off without giving you a chance to call out for him. Even weirder. Every corner you turn, there he is laughing with someone else but the moment you take your eyes off him for a second, he’s gone. You furrowed your eyebrows as you watched Haechan trying to subtly walk away from you. He can’t really be that mad at you, right?

It has been 4 days since you last saw Haechan and it basically confirmed your suspicions. He was avoiding you. But the question was why?

You tried to remember if you did anything to piss him off the past week but your brain gave you nothing. You tried asking his friends but they shrugged as they didn’t know the reason as well. You finally decide that you had enough of it and go to confront him.

So that’s how you ended up in front of Haechan’s apartment door. You rang the doorbell and waited, rocking back and forth on your heels. You heard shuffling coming from behind the door and it opened to reveal a just-woken-up-from-a-nap Haechan.

You smiled at him once he opened the door but Haechan’s eyes widened and he slammed the door shut. You blinked. What just happened? Regaining from the shock of his actions, you wasted no time and bent down to get the spare key under the welcome mat.

You quickly opened the door to his apartment and stepped in, ready to give Haechan a piece of your mind for his stupid antics. Haechan shrieked when he saw you came in.

You glared at him and jut her finger at him accusingly. “You’ve been avoiding me,” you said.

Haechan gulped and played it off. “No, I have not,” he said through gritted teeth and walked past you to the kitchen.

“Yes, yes you have! I texted you and you didn’t even reply back for days, Haechan,” you said, following him into the kitchen.

“Taste of your own medicine, then,” he mumbled under his breath. But it was loud enough for you to pick it up.

You raised a brow and scoffed. “Is this because I didn’t answer your texts the other day?”

Haechan turned his head to the side, not wanting to make eye contact. His lack of response told you that it was a yes.

“Haechan, you can’t be serious. I told you I was at a family reunion!”

You stared at him with your doe eyes widened. “Boyfriend? I don’t have a boyfriend, what are you talking about?”

“Are you sure you weren’t out with your boyfriend,” he blurted out. Haechan slapped his hand over his mouth, that wasn’t supposed to be said out loud.

“I saw you with another guy at the arcade that day,” he blurted out once again. He winced once those words left his mouth. Dang it Haechan, couldn’t he keep his mouth shut just this once?

You blinked for a few seconds before realization finally settled in. You couldn’t help but laugh at his accusation, causing Haechan to glare at you. “You mean Jongho? He’s my cousin,” you told him after you stopped laughing.

Oh.

Your cousin. The word echoed in his head. The "boyfriend" was just your cousin.

“Besides,” you added, leaning against the counter, “why would you care if I got a boyfriend anyway? What, do you like me or something?”

Haechan visibly stiffened at the last sentence. Oh boy, he hopes you didn’t notice him freeze. But of course you noticed it, you noticed every detail of him.

“Wait, do you actually like me?” You asked. You were internally panicking. Holy shit, does he like you? It’s too good to be true, right?

“Yeah,” he said quietly after a few seconds of silence. He was looking down at his feet. “Is that a bad thing?” He whispered, finally lifting his head up to meet your gaze.

‘Of course it isn't, because I like you too,’ you wanted to tell him. You had liked him the moment he introduced himself as your neighbour when they were 6 years old. But the way he flirts around other girls always gave you the thought that he didn’t feel the same.

You stayed silent too long for Haechan’s liking. ‘Oh no, they’re going to reject me,’ he thought. Before you could even open his mouth, he quickly added on, “It’s okay if you don’t like me though! I totally get it.”

“Haechan—“

“No, no it’s okay, Y/N. I understand. You don’t like me, I mean of course you wouldn’t. You probably see me as a brother and nothing more. So let’s just forget this ever happened and—“

He was too busy rambling to notice that you were advancing towards him. You got on your tiptoes and gave him a peck on his lips. Haechan immediately shut up, and froze on the spot. It was merely a peck but it was more than enough to make him stop working. His cheeks were now red at the sudden contact. You had an amused smile in your lips.

“D-Does this mean you like me too?” He stuttered out.

Instead of saying anything, you nodded and wrapped your hands around his neck, bringing him down for another kiss, this time it was longer. Haechan smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around your waist.

When you pulled away, you whispered, “I like you too, idiot.”

[bonus]

“Wait, so Jongho is that cousin who could break apples with his hand? While singing?!” Haechan repeated what you told him. You were now sitting on his lap, your back against his chest, his arms around you.

“Uh huh, he even broke a watermelon with his finger once,” you added. “And he’s like an older brother to me, so if you ever break my heart...”

Haechan visibly shuddered at the thought of Jongho breaking his neck. He hugged you tighter and buried his head into your neck, causing you to let out a laugh.

thank you for reading and requests are open!

#requested #kpop #lee haechan #lee donghyuck #nct #nct dream #nct 127 #nct dream imagines #nct imagines #nct 127 imagines #haechan imagines #nct haechan #nct dream haechan #haechan #haechan scenarios #haechan x reader #haechan fluff #haechan smut #lee donghyuck imagines #donghyuck #kpop imagines

[florencesmachine]

tell me what's going on

Why tumblr user donottearmedown/luciequeenofelfame/luciehvrondaie is an embarrassment: a Masterpost

Hi if you’re here it’s because you’ve heard that tumblr user donottearmedown is an embarrassment and you’d like to know all the details! Let me break it down. It all started with this post by @minacarstairs (Tessa (yes @minacarstairs’s name is Tessa sorry if that makes this post confusing)), in which donottearmedown originally reached out to Tessa by sending her something along the lines of “Do you ship heronstairs/herongraystairs?” And Tessa replied with something along the lines of “Yeah lmao herongraystairs rights!”

(I wanna note that Tessa was being very polite, and continues to be very polite to people who disagree with her opinions on heronstairs/herongraystairs. She even began her original conversation with dont tear me down by saying it’s a matter of personal interpretation :) it’s donottearmedown who made the conversation mean-spirited)

(Also Tessa pls correct next if I’m wrong on any of this thnx)

And then sometime later, the conversation above ensues in which donottearmedown, seemingly perfectly reasonable at first, disagrees with the ship and offers a link to look at. (She throws this link around any chance she gets. She really fucking loves this link.) I got involved because in her answer, Tessa replies back with a link from a post I made from my own blog starting back in 2018, and then continued to add to it until my account got terminated (long story). You can read through both posts and check out all the replies! But basically we realized during this interaction that donottearmedown wasn’t looking to have a friendly conversation and was, in fact, batshit crazy. They were saying some absolute brain dead shit like that people shipping heronstairs is the same as people shipping Alec x Clary. Here’s the screenshot:

donottearmedown came back the next day to reply on several of Tessa and mine’s post which she wasn’t even tagged in, such as this one, and this one that had absolutely nothing to do with her because I make that same post every year. Here’s a screenshot from my old account last year via Instagram:

(there are more posts she replied to but I can’t be bothered to look for them, I’m sure you can find them on their blog if you can spare the braincells)

Racism by donottearmedown:

So, Tessa received this anon which tipped us off to some of the other tomfoolery on donottearmedown’s blog. We decided to look for ourselves and lo and behold, here’s the post of donottearmedown accusing Cassandra Clare of having a “Chinese kink” for writing Jessa:

Which, first of all, makes no sense because there’s like 2 Chinese characters in TSC total. If anything CC has a straight white boy kink lmao. But by saying this she was basically implying that the ONLY way Tessa (book!Tessa), or anybody who loves Jem, can love him is if they have a “Chinese kink”. Which donottearmedown can’t seem to be able to understand is an incredibly racist thing to say and think.

They also reblogged this BLM link and proceeded to tag it with absolute nonsense like “#smoke weed #lose weight #wessa”. I don’t know if her intentions were to mock the BLM movement but I still found this to be so incredibly disrespectful and tone deaf.

I also feel like I should mention this ask sent to Tessa in which donottearmedown implies she ~could be~ Asian, but it’s “none of her business anyways” (as if being Asian would absolve anyone of being racist akjsksjsj), but based on the fact that she has a track record of lying and pretending to be a person she’s not (as you will soon see :)) I call bullshit lmao:

I think that was the last of our interactions until today? Tessa and I were distracted because we have, you know, real lives.

But anyway, that brings us to today.

donottearmedown started replying to posts from mine and Tessa’s blogs which she wasn’t tagged in, again, and made several days ago. This one literally wasn’t even about her, it was about someone else that had engaged with one of Tessa’s posts. I made that post over a week ago and had already forgotten about it, but clearly donottearmedown never stops thinking about us 😳

NOW I WOULD LIKE TO POINT OUT THIS POST SPECIFICALLY.

Why? Because donottearmedown and luciequeenofelfame (now luciehervndaie) interacted on this post, as 2 seperate entities. luciequeenofelfame had also interacted with Tessa and I’s original posts at the beginning of June (you can check the replies on the posts!) coming to donottearmedown’s defense, and praising her for her opinions and other shit like that.

Here’s the screenshot. As you can see here, luciehervndaie reblogs from donottearmedown and adds on to their opinion:

Now here’s the kicker: donottearmedown and luciehervndaie are the same person.

As in, this bitch literally made up a second blog so that she can pretend to be someone else agreeing with her own opinions and cheering herself on.

Here’s the proof:

I made this post calling out donottearmedown on their racism. I didn’t bother tagging her in the original post because I knew she was stalking my blog and would see it eventually anyway. 😌 And they took the bait, as you can see.

AND THEN I got the notification that luciequeenofelfame had replied to my post. Here’s the reply:

Now here’s where donottearmedown/luciequeenofelfame made an oopsie! 😳

Notice where luciequeenofelfame says “1. I didn’t delete it lmao”. She’s responding to my tags on this post where I’m calling out donottearmedown on her racist post, and my tags read:

“#the fact you went and deleted this post because you KNEW you were about to get slammed #comedy”

(context: @wilhelminacarstairs looked on donottearmedown’s blog recently looking for the post I screenshotted in the link above, and he couldn’t find it so I assumed she deleted it so that I wouldn’t call her out on it. Although she claims she didn’t delete it, so! Maybe it’s still up! Feel free to look for it and let me know lmao)

Now, in the tags I am obviously talking to donottearmedown, correct? So then why is luciequeenofelfame replying that she didn’t delete anything? 🤔 AND JUST AS IM ABOUT TO REPLY-

Wow, looks like I can’t reblog the post. Why? Because luciequeenofelfame has deleted it, and then IMMEDITALY changed her url to luciehvrondaie, hoping it would cover her tracks. Little does she know, tumblr notifications are forever:

As you can see, donottearmedown/luciequeenofelfame/luciehervndaie realized they made an oopsie, so she deleted her first response and posted it again from the blog she actually MEANT to post it from. Damn if only she knew that @minacarstairs @wilhelminacarstairs and I keep screenshots of e v e r y t h i n g :/ Then she might have gotten away with it! 😩

But yeah lmao here are the posts I made about it immeditaly afterwards calling her out on it because I thought it was funny: X X X X

She defends herself on some of them saying shit like “wow so I’m just making up blogs for support wessa? The majority of the fandom supports Wessa so I’m all of those blogs according to you? I’m thousands of people?!” Or just trying to change the topic back to heronstairs and ignoring the allegations altogether. Like, no luv we’re not saying you’re every single Wessa blog ever. We’re just saying you’re these 2, and we’re right lmao. If you look through both their blogs they also post about the same fandoms, and more damning, make a lot of the same spelling errors. Seriously their speech pattern is exactly the same. Feel free to look through them if you want, and if they don’t start mass-deleting post trying to cover their tracks.

BONUS:

I don’t know how true this is, but according to @fair-but-wilde-child on this ask, donottearmedown is ALSO the infamous twitter stan that complained to CC about TLH having too many gay characters.

EXTRA BONUS:

luciequeenofelfame/luciehvrondaie (donottearmedown’s second account 😌) is the account responsible for that wessa vs jessa comparison chart that went around a while ago LMAOOOOOOOO embarrassing

tl;dr: donottearmedown/luciequeenofelfame/luciehvrondaie is a biphobic racist who’s opinions are so bad she has to make a second account to agree with herself

🥺 tragic

Also I wanna say for the record, as @minacarstairs ans @wilhelminacarstairs will testify, I guessed a while ago these accounts were the same person when I noticed their speech patterns were eerily similar, and how luciequeenofelfame always seemed to reply to donottearmedown’s posts IMMEDITATELY after they were posted. 

So the lesson for today? Cinthia is always right. 😤

#WHEW this took a while but here u go #feel free to scroll back through my blog and see the posts #also ive tagged almost everything from these interactions with her url #donottearmedown #replies #bidrewtanaka #long post