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laenordeservedbetter · 1 year

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For Sam x reader.

Ghostface is back and had followed the Carpenters, the twins, and Amber's older sister, Reader, to New York. No one trusting her because of the fact that her little sister was Ghostface, Reader is in disbelief, and Sam breaks up with her on the spot. Fast forward to the end, where Ghostface is dead, everyone's being treated by paramedics, Reader is seen walking away from the scene alone. Kirby asks where she is, Sam then sees her walking away, holding her broken arm to her body, and runs after her and apologies for not trusting and believing her. (Reader saying it's too late for sam to apologize. She then walks away from her friends, from Sam.)

You're Somebody Else

Words: 1.4k

Pairing: Samantha Carpenter x Fem!Freeman!Reader

Synopsis: You were told that the biggest betrayal comes from the people you care about the most, but never did you expect it to hurt so much.

Warnings: scream vi spoilers, violence, spitting, cussing, angst, no happy ending. lmk if I missed any.

A/N: I wrote this at a coffee shop. I'm still here rn, so we'll see how many fics I can post before I go home. (This will probably be the only one)

not my gif. || masterlist || previous work

You stood before Amber’s Ghostface outfit, reaching out to touch the fabric before you remembered where you were -- who you’re with. The glares given to you by the rest of the group burned at the back of your skull. You can practically sense their judgments. Since the first Ghostface attack in New York, they pointed their fingers at you. You understood, given what you've all been through. Can't be too careful. You didn’t care that you saw the contempt on your own girlfriend’s face. You stayed by her side, understanding where she was coming from.

Being related to a previous Ghostface was something you and Sam had in common. When you are linked to a person with that track record, it sticks with you even if you are different from them. Trust becomes hard to give. And out of everyone, you figured your girlfriend is the one who understood the most about what it’s like. However, it looks like the sentiment isn’t shared.

She approaches you, getting the courage to ask, “Can we talk?”

You can tell what’s about to happen before Sam can utter what she wants to say to you.

Nothing good ever comes out of conversations like these.

“I’m sorry.” Sam stares, her gaze cold, nothing like the Sam you fell in love with. With each deafening step she takes away from you, your heart shatters just a little bit more. You are wounded by the way she’s looking at you. Any wound or injury you might sustain in the next few minutes will not compare to the poison laced in the invisible knife held against your throat by the woman you love. “I can’t take any more chances. I can’t trust you. We’re done.”

You scoff, glancing towards the group in hopes that they would back up your claim. “Sam, you know me. I would never hurt you or Tara or. . . Anika.”

Mindy flinches at the mention of her girlfriend’s name. Her stare hardens. “You have no right to say her name. We know you did it. You killed her.”

“Mindy…” Your voice breaks as your throat feels like it’s closing up. You can’t do anything to convince them, letting the stream of tears flow from your eyes. No one came to your rescue to prove your innocence. None of them trusted you. You felt pathetic, humiliated, embarrassed. Your eyes settle on Sam again. “Really? After everything we’ve been through together, you-”

Sam glowers. “It’s over, Y/n. Please, stay away from us.”

“Fuck you.” You turn your back, the hurt in your tone clear as day. “I don’t know you at all.”

“Maybe we didn’t know each other as well as we thought.”

It was one thing for you to walk away and another knowing that Sam would not be going after you.

“It was easy luring you away from the group. Guess we really can’t choose our family, huh?” Ghostface makes a tsk sound, the voice changer turned off.

He takes a step forward, but you stay positioned adjacent to the wall. That voice…

“Ethan?”

Ethan removes his mask, holding the voice changer to his lips, “Didn’t expect that?”

Of course it was him. Little by little, the pieces fall into place. The apartment attack -- that was probably Ethan. He wasn’t with the group. Not even the skeptic Mindy questioned his whereabouts. Your tears haven’t dried yet and you were as sure as hell they weren’t going to stop now. You bring your hands together in a slow clap. “Oh, wow, that’s… Fucking brilliant, actually.” Clutching your stomach, you let out what sounded like a painful cackle. “This is the part where I die.” You say. It wasn’t a question, but a statement.

“Oh no, no, no. See, that’s where you’re wrong.” Ethan smirks, gripping your left arm, applying pressure to where you had been previously injured a couple nights prior. “You are our scapegoat. I must give credit to Mindy for the idea. You have the perfect motive to be Ghostface! It was just gonna be Sam, but… The press would go crazier if it was a Bonnie & Clyde situation. Not that I care about that sorta stuff. It just works.”

You collect the saliva from your mouth, spitting in his eye. “Jokes on you ‘cause we’re not together anymore.”

“But they wouldn’t know that because by the time you get ‘caught’, all of your friends will be dead and you would look like the asshole trying to save yourself if you attempt to say the truth.”

Ethan places his free hand on your shoulder, pulling your arm with more force than necessary to guarantee that it would break. You stand there, biting your lip in order to hide the pain. If I screamed, it wouldn’t make a difference anyway, you said to yourself bitterly. There’s not a single person who’d give me the benefit of the doubt. In fact, they’d make me suffer worse, believing that Ethan did the right thing. Who knows what creative scenarios he came up with already.

The paramedics found you slumped down beside a row of chairs after Sam and the rest of the group defeated the three Ghostfaces. They wondered why you weren’t with the others, but with a quick word from Kirby, they left you alone, guiding you outside to treat your broken arm. One of the paramedics - Theo (that’s what you heard Kirby call him) asked if you wanted a ride to the hospital. You declined, insisting that you could get there yourself without anyone’s help.

You spare Sam a glance, observing her interact with Mindy, Chad, and Tara. Core Four. Good for them. Although you were glad that they are are still extant, you can’t stop the rancor that you feel as you stare at the four. You want nothing more than for this day to be over, move to someplace else, maybe change your name. Anywhere is better than here. It’s become clear to you how unwanted you are in New York. A change of scenery might do you good.

Kirby (the only person who hasn’t treated you like scum) situates herself in front of Sam, “Hey, where’s Y/n?”

Sam only notices your absence when Kirby pointed it out. “Shit. I…” She scans the area in search of your familiar eyes, guilt eating at her knowing that she accused you of being a killer. Because of that, you got hurt. She’d never forgive herself for it. “I'll be right back.”

The blonde detective nods in understanding. “I’ll stay with Tara.”

“Thank you.”

You were on your way to the hospital when a hand grasps your injured arm. Recoiling from the touch, you look back to curse the one responsible for hurting your limb only to meet Sam’s pleading gaze. “What do you want, Samantha?”

“Y/n, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for being careless, for not trusting or believing you. If I had, you wouldn’t have gotten hurt.” Sam touches your good shoulder this time, expressing her genuine apology.

But no matter how many ‘I’m sorry’s’ she will direct at you, it won’t take away what’s been done. “It’s too late, Sam.”

“What? No. We can try again.” She pleads desperately.

You couldn’t bite back the words the words that are on the tip of your tongue, feeling the last ounce of self control fray away. “Try again? Do you hear how ridiculous that sounds? You broke up with me because you didn’t trust me. You didn’t even try to understand my side!” The news reporters turned their heads at your outburst. They point their cameras to you, but you don’t make an effort to cut off your ebullition short. “All of you pointed your hands at me because what? I’m the sister of a killer?! If we’re basing our suspicions of all the Ghostface’s relatives, you should’ve been on the top of the list. The only thing I asked was for you to stand by me and you failed. So, no, we can’t try again. We’ll only end up worse than where we left off.” You finish, walking away from everything (not for the first time). “I’ll get my things out of your apartment tonight. After that, you won’t have to see me again.”

Sam stays still while you leave, clutching your arm in the process. That limb will heal, but the words that Sam has spoken won’t. There will remain a constant reminder of how you were betrayed by those you would give everything for.

So much for trust.

#samantha carpenter #sam carpenter x reader #sam carpenter #scream 6 #scream #mindy meeks martin #anika kayoko #ethan landry

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starabram97 · 1 year

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----- I know this is an extremely late post but the reason for that was being afraid of what I perceived as an implicit threat to hurt me further if I ever spoke out. I've been told by the friends(?) of people who are associated with those who either treated this as a joke or expressed their disliking for me based on the allegations that they genuinely do not want to engage in any further drama about this, so after a lot of support to speak out trusting that everyone's interested in burying the hatchet, I'll be giving my piece. AGAIN, this is not to resurrect old, dead drama, but to amend misunderstandings. I want to make it VERY CLEAR that I do not want this to be taken as an excuse to attack anybody. Everyone makes mistakes, I did, they did, we all did in one form or another. I don't want people on either side to be harassed from what I'm revealing. Of course, I want to make another clear apology to anybody that has either been hurt or distressed by me for any reason. I do not want to hurt anybody, that was never my intention and I'm deeply sorry for it. ----- Now to start, I want to make it extremely clear that I am not a supporter of any racism, pedophilia, anti-semitism or any other hateful, predatory or otherwise stupid attitudes or opinions. Many of those who have investigated me on a personal level or have known me for years can attest to this. However, I cannot blame anybody for misunderstanding my silence on the matter regardless of reason. So that context of what I have to say is clear, I will try to split it into three parts that will help disprove allegations. == twitter.com/mega_strimp/status/1468592642585997317 == Previous public responses to this situation:

Understand that a lot of the images shown and things said in the main allegation post are taken out of context. I do not believe it was made by the poster to intentionally frame me wrongly, but I hope the following helps understand what's my and my friend's perspectives on this. ==================== 1. Strimp's Characters Art This was an artwork that he endorsed himself as part of some @#$%posting we would do. I have no idea why he's decided to lie about this, but whatever. Regarding his age, I only recently-ish was told he was 19 by him in an unrelated Kirby server. Prior to this, I had no idea how old he was and it did not help that he'd engage with these kinds of jokes in the past. (I want to note that Strimp said he just turned 19 on January of 2022, his Twitter states his birthday's on August 13 and the artwork was made on March of 2020, which implies he was 18 and not a minor, but I digress.)

==================== 2. The Fairy Queen Drawing This artwork is one of poor taste. However, I remember it showing developed breasts and I think pubes as well. Regardless, I am told by a friend that it's real and we all agree that the art style presented was an extremely poor choice (one I will never replicate for obvious reasons), however I want to note that this artwork was apparently made in response to a request... there is reason to believe it might have been requested to cause trouble as troll accounts have been seen posting a sketched-version with red headphones, but I no longer have evidence of that. edit (12-16-2022): User DeafeningGardenerPanda has suggested that I strikethrough the above comment to clarify that I'm not trying to shift blame onto trolls for past artwork. More clarification on this can be found on this Twitter post: twitter.com/StarAbram97/status/1601847651082727424 ==================== 3. "Raiding" of TG Server This is something that I do not understand why he calls a raid. This is a situation that was amended long before his post regarding two users egging on Strimp for having previously insulted the programmer , Wynaut, of the fangame " Project Ice Cream" - This situation was de-escalated and taken care of while alongside those who were banned and Light MetaS - we all agreed that tossing "brutal fighting-words" (memes) and egging on him "under his own roof" was grounds for a fair banning - Strimp was with us throughout this entire situation.

I do want to note that I have cought Wynaut starting arguments out of thin air with Strimp in public, which flies at the face of trying to operate in isolation on our project. Wynaut is no longer with us, so I cannot gather their reasoning for this. I cant agree with whatever Strimp wants to call the back-and-fourth, but I understand after investigating the timeline of events alongside Strimp's own friends that there was pointless drama fueling friction. Because Strimp (we believe) assumed that I knew this was going on, he likely thought I was involved in trying to start pointless fights. For more context regarding the events shortly prior to the allegation posts and Wynaut, the below images should detail it.

==================== 4. Edgy Political jokes regarding Kirby Characters To be honest, I fully take responsibility for the "Ultra Hyness", Meta-Knights Adeleine and Haltmann Conquerers memes - these are artworks made to laugh to between friends due to how ridiculous they are - specially as two of them are doing roman salutes. While I do nowadays better understand the sensitivity one can feel towards these types of jokes, I hope it makes sense that making fun of these things is to put them down and mock them, not to promote the context of their joke. I want to note that Strimp and his friends who promoted the allegations post share this type of edgy humor in one form or another, so I don't know why it was brought up in this light. I do want to re-state that if for whatever reason these jokes or types of @#$%posts have offended or hurt you somehow, that I am sorry. I truly mean it when I say that all I hoped was to make people laugh.

==================== 5. Regarding who I am as a person and Final Allegations. I want to note here that the following statements are not mine's but of people that have known me for a very long time. Although some may want to argue there's a bias involved, please take note of their honesty towards me and the mistakes I've done.

Both these statements come from friends/contributors of TG and Strimp, some of which y'all might recognize. In the past, I naively expected anyone genuinely interested in figuring out the truth of a situation to consider these kinds of opinions, but I'm only recently coming with the realization that I need make a statement of my own, as the silence has not contributed at all.

===== IMPOSTORS, ALTS AND TROLL ACCOUNTS ===== === https://twitter.com/MasterUja/status/1590906956843483136 === Below I will explain my experience with harassment campaigns that go back years and how they've affected this situation. Like many others, if you were unaware of this prior, you might come to realize that in this situation it is possible that both me and Strimp are victims and that this whole string of events is all a misunderstanding. Why did I argue that my accusers were/are playing foul? The history between me and harassment accounts go all the way back almost 5-6 years. As stated in one of the statements about me above, it was born from a splintering between people who wanted to use free speech to be rambunctious and those who wanted it as a cherry on top for a space meant for artists to make music videos and games. There are multiple people that can attest to having been invited to the split-off space years ago, they've described to me that this was a space where they would set up literal "fuck star" chatrooms and do nothing but plot raids against me, try to dig dirt non-stop and generally circle-jerk about how awful I am for calling them out as undesirables to the space. (Again, this is what I've been told - I personally avoided this space and had no interest in meddling in their free-will hence my general ignorance of it) PLEASE DO NOT hold the following stuff against those who perpetuated it. I do not want drama, but I want to let the world know what my whole perspective is and why there was friction between me and Team Gamble, friction that lead to the allegations post. For years, I've been begging the admin (Diamond) of the space to please ask that the particular members members involved with trolling tone it down and to not harass my friends. Over time of being told I was being a crazy conspiracy theorist for even thinking that, or be given a fake "safe space" to spill my guts with the admin, eventually limited to only asking those who were mutual friends that did not agree with the trolling but did want to keep in good terms with the splintered group, I've been sent this as a response when openly trying to rationalize if it's all a figment of my imagination or not.

I want to note that the questionable users have told me that this is a thing of the past and that they do not engage in this behavior anymore. However, I want to show this because it is critical to understanding what perspective I hold regarding why all of this has happened. The following Screenshots are public and were published by a twitter account that goes by "@TeamgambleT". In these screenshots, you can see the admin and users that previously thought of slandering me as fun, calling me slurs and other things closely interact with the inner circle of Team Gamble.

Below are examples of troll accounts that reacted to the fallout at DreamCrafter. Note the Date (if it matters)

AGAIN, I do not want to point fingers, but make it clear what shaped my perspective regarding this whole situation - What you make of it should be based on whatever all these things mean to you as an outside observer.

As of the time of writing this, this Twitter block list is exclusively made up of impostor, troll accounts and a few people who would spend time to spread allegations on me. When said accounts are looked through, they often interact closely with Team Gamble. Impostor accounts have a history of sexual misconduct with others, often minors and have a history of posting a lot of racially charged gay sex videos and other types of content making a mockery of skin color or sexual deviation. They've also been used across Discord to do similar activities. These accounts also have a history of harassing TNHGameRemixes for being black, which seems fueled by past friction between him and Strimp when I was being consoled and being helped in putting together evidence of troll account behavior.

Above are examples of impostor accounts interacting with people and even a popular gimmick account in a mock conversation. This account's best known for it's awesome "THE SKELETON APPEARS" meme. People might have noticed that the account is also used to refer to me by name to target me, and only did so once it knew of my new account which contrasts with the prior interactions of "owning" me for fake NFTs. I personally do not mind this, but it's worth noting the same people that participate in a lot of the content above are related to the few gimmick accounts. A reason for my silence has been the fear of the implicit threat to use said gimmick accounts to target me in retaliation for any drama that might arise from explaining my side publicly. It would certainly explain why an account of over 25k followers would target one with less than 50. However, again, this is just an explanation of my perspective and the silence I've held onto. The folks behind this content should be allowed to thrive making content that is fun and meme-tastic. Although i would prefer not being targeted like this, I would lie if I said I do not enjoy the account's content and memey edge. ....

Lastly, I want to make it clear, once again, that my intention is to explain my side for once and let people see what things look like from me and my friend's perspective - to understand my personal reasons to having stayed silent and why I feel like I'm taking an incredible risk to post this online. I've made it clear to many people throughout the whole time, going back over a year in private phone calls and even people who would allow me to vent about this that all I wish is peace with others. That I do not blame anybody for having issue with my past jokes and sense of humor. I live with the shame of thinking I might have hurt somebody, and am reminded every. single. day. But even through it all, I still reach out hope that these things can be amended and that everyone involved could agree to bury the hatchet and move forward our own ways. I've been silent, isolated and trying to only do things in my own space - not bothering anybody, not interacting with the greater fandom, dealing with the unavoidable anxiety and stress that I can only imagine would make anybody weaker-willed think of suicide as a viable escape. People have been hurt from this, including those the people involved with trolling and fake allegations called their close friends. There are victims of this that churn my heart every time I think about them and the guilt they expressed for all this. The following images are posted not with permission, but I hope that those who saw this person as a very close friend can understand the amount of harm they're causing others by enabling all this pointless, overblown allegation nonesense.

I thank anybody from the depths of my heart for reading through this. I genuinely feel like in retaliation I might be targeted with a force beyond my imagination, so please understand how I feel to post this and why I was silent. As a last note, This was a public apology I made on my last Twitter account. It was made under the supervision of Strimp and some friends of his that helped get in touch. Sadly the conversation was not perfect on his part, but I hope it expresses how badly I wish that this can all be put behind and for all this harassment to stop - but also express how deeply sorry I am for anybody I would have hurt in the past.

Thank you for your time.

================= Update 2.21.2023 added image and expansion regarding pufferfish inside-jokes, references to being "famished" relating to impostor and troll accounts.

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shevee-the-word-wielder · 10 months

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Creature of Soul Matter: The Emotion in Heart

Chapter 3: Mysterious Artifact

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I apologize for any awkward spacing, it's normally good but Tumblr has some weird spacing in of itself.

Creature of Soul Matter: The Emotion in Heart AO3

"So, where do you want to start?" Elfilin asks me, resting on my horn.

"Hmm…" I start thinking to myself. "I guess I might know where one of them is… kinda."

"Who is it? And how?"

"If I remember correctly… he was sealed away in a crystal of barriers and vanished… he's the one I couldn't save…"

"What was his name?" Meta Knight asks.

"Galacta Knight."

Meta Knight stares at me with surprised eyes. "The Galacta Knight? The Galacta Knight that was the greatest warrior in the universe? The one that could destroy planets? The Galacta Knight from the ancient texts?"

I squint at him. "He was depicted… as all that?" I think about him, "He was an amazing fighter, yes, often refused to use jabbing." I chuckle at the memory of him failing to break barrier after barrier. "And he only half destroyed one planet… and he didn't even mean to, they just attacked us and he was defending them…" my smile fades.

"Well, there are legends on how to summon him." Meta Knight explains.

When he notices the weird looks he explains, "I wanted to try to summon him and fight 'The Strongest Warrior' some time ago, so I spent some time studying the foretold methods."

Dedede rolls his eyes, face palms and shakes his head.

Kirby sneaks up on him, "Was it all about sword duals with you?" He teases.

"Old you was quite the doozy!" Dedede pipes in.

Meta Knight sighs, dropping his hands down. "Can we please move along and just get to finding Galacta Knight?" He begs.

Bandee chuckles, "Come on guys, let's stop bullying Metaaa"

Meta Knight snaps his wings out and flies up. He turns to look down on everyone, "From what I have studied, there are power spots located in some ancient structures and locations that can be used to bring him back... Keep in mind, this is what I've seen most of, it may be false!"

"Got it!" Kirby yells, a Warpstar flying up behind him.

"Oh, you all have Warpstars?" I softly ask, basically to myself.

They all hope onto it. Their speed of getting on, even with their different ways of holding on, shows how many times they've done this before.

Elfilin decides to continue to hang onto my head. "I can make portals to a few places that I remember, but I want to know what it's like for you." He explains.

"If you say so." I tell him, "I won't stop you."

Kirby flies his Warpstar up and I follow. Meta Knight thinks for a second before pointing his sword in a direction.

Kirby has his star zip off. I would be struggling to keep up if I didn't have my vortices. I fly through one after the other, keeping my eyes on Kirby.

We fly through space for a while, then Kirby picks up speed, he joyously laughs in the process.

Watching them all like this, I just can't help but to smile.

Something catches my eye, a dark floating structure with basically nothing around. We've been flying for a while and I wasn't expecting a break in the constant space that isn't a planet or star. I portal in front of Kirby and get him to stop.

I point to the ominous structure. "This feels important." I tell them.

Kirby looks at Dedede and Dedede nods.

As we approach the structure, the pieces floating around it become more obvious and the purple crystals lacing it's walls are more prominent.

As we enter its first arch, gravity seems to work again, everyone hops off the Warpstar and Elfilin flies down to them. I drape down my wings as to not scrape the ceiling.

Everyone with a weapon draws it. Kirby wanders to some nearby debris and uncovers a piece of a spear. He swallows it and gets a spear and headband.

"Oh, I got one of those as well." I say, summoning my own.

Meta Knight looks me up and down, "That's not a spear." He says, "That's a halberd."

"O-... Oh okay…?" I say, surprised by the sudden correction.

We all silently start walking down the halls, Elfilin following not far behind.

There's pieces of spears and arrows scattered everywhere. "This place seems like it was once riddled with traps." Meta Knight observes.

"Well thank you mister obvious!" Dedede retorts.

Everyone stops and looks at him.

"Err, uh… sorry, I'm really stressed right now. This place is rubbing me the wrong way." He apologies, clearly a bit embarrassed.

"D- don't worry sire, I'm spooked by this place as well!" Bandee reassures him.

Dedede pats him on the head a few times while we start to go again.

We travel a few more halls. Weapons, debris and set off traps everywhere; I've spotted multiple skeletons and somewhat shutter at the sight of each, many creatures of different species have died in here.

I look back down on everyone to make sure we're all still here, then I look back up, but not in time to react to a low hanging arch. I ram headfirst into it and step back, holding my head and yelling in pain.

I suddenly trip, a pile of debris is behind me, and I fall into a mass of broken weapons and building.

I groan as Elfilin rushes over, closely followed by Kirby. Bandee and Dedede soon come over and Meta Knight follows.

"Are you okay!?" Elfilin panicky questions.

I pull out a spearhead that rested like a thorn from my shoulder. "Kinda." I wince as I pull piece of wood out of my wing.

I look back up to where I hit my head, I can see strange markings in it. I let my eyes drift down to the hall that follows.

"That's not… right…" I mutter, the hall has debris but no weapons or evidence of set off traps.

I look back up at the markings, it's written in Halgraw text. I rise up to take a better look at it.

"You can read that?" Elfilin asks.

I put my hand on it and look back down at the group, "I can, mostly, it's Halgraw text." I try to explain.

I look back to the words and read them, "they seem to be instructions on the different traps…" I continue to read.

"Is that why so many have gone off?" Dedede figures out, "because none were able to read these instructions?"

He's probably right… what could they be wanting to guard that they would make so many traps and so that only Halgraws can make it through? "That could be right." I answer.

I look back down onto the ground behind me and see the markings and shapes for a trap trigger point.

I look into the next hall and see the line of scratches. I pick up a rock and toss it onto the marks. Immediately fireballs shoot out from either wall.

I walk up and look into the holes. Orbs with little shapes at the center rest in each. Sparking some sort of memory in me.

Kirby walks up as well.

"Oh hey! I recognize these!"

Meta Knight flies up and looks as well.

"Ah yes, these are Energy Spheres if I recall correctly, they were used in the Lor Starcutter."

I recognize part of that… "A Lor?" I question.

"A Lor?" Meta Knight repeats, "no, the Lor Starcutter."

"A Lor is a type of ship used for intergalactic travel… it can open portals and travel at light breaking speed."

"Sure sounds like the Lor Starcutter." Dedede says, now next to me. "Are they also legended to be sentient?"

"Uhhh, no?" I say, confused. "I've never heard of a sentient one…"

Meta Knight suddenly backs up, "Let us not stray too far from our goal, whatever that might be."

'I guess you're right, ' Dedede says, stretching. "Let's get going."

"I should try something first." I say. "Now that we know traps are active past this point, I want to see if I can open a vortex."

Everyone turns to me as I attempt to open a portal to no avail. "That's what I thought…" I sigh. "Magic from us doesn't work here."

Now I'm glad I summoned my spear earlier.

We slowly make our way through the increasingly darkening halls, preemptively setting off trap after trap. We eventually need to light a few arrows, that are shot at us, on fire, using another one of the traps to do so.

I see a light coming from the next turn, a cool purple glow flowing from it. "Oh finally." I sigh.

We set off the last trap and rush down. I turn and walk into a room riddled with stone carvings and crystals.

At the center, on a pedestal, rests an Energy Sphere that at the center appeared to have the yellow color drained. It's also the thing that the glow comes from.

I approach cautiously, looking for any more potential traps.

"I did not expect this to turn into a relic expedition." I remark, "But here we are…" I snatch the orb and hold it to my chest, where it grows to fit my hand… for some reason... I expect something terrific and life altering to happen, but instead the roof slowly starts to open up, exposing the stars again.

Everyone slowly walks up to me, looking up and admiring the view of the nearby galaxy.

I look back down at the sphere and it's light seems to have all concentrated in a cone shape, acting like an arrow and pointing up.

"I… I think we need to go that way…" I say pointing in the same direction.

"Maybe… but that's for another time. We still need to go find that hotspot. We've spent enough time here already." Meta Knight responds. "If you give me the orb, I have a place we can put it."

I semi-reluctantly put the sphere on the ground where it shrinks and Meta Knight grabs it and puts it in his cape.

He must see my confused face, "Dimensional Cape." He elaborates.

It barely helps, but at least I now know that it's special and can be good storage.

Kirby's Warpstar comes in through the roof and the four all hop on it again, Elfilin grabs back onto my head.

We all take off and start going back in the direction we were going prior.

While warping through space I ask Elfilin, "Hey, you've been quiet for the past while, are you okay?"

"Hm? Oh ya, I'm okay. It's just, that place creeped me out…"

"If you say so..."

#fecto elfilis #elfilis #elfilin #kirby fanfic #cosm #creature of soul matter #galacta knight #kirby au #kirby #bandana waddle dee #bandee #king dedede #meta knight

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beann-e · 3 years

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Haikyu characters reacting to their s/o screaming back at them

Nekoma Characters reacting to their s/o Screaming back at them

Read Part One Here

kenma

-it would not take much -_-

- Kenma doesn’t even notice he’s yelling at you or much less using his raised voice when talking to you

-he’s so used to screaming at kuroo through his mic that when he’s finally pissed off and bubbling ; it just happens after you try to ask him what he wants for dinner at the wrong time

-post time skip

“ go left “ The sound of the controller clicking swirled through the room as your boyfriends eyes followed the screen at every turn his character took “ kuroo I said go left “

“ uh which one ? “

kenmas face went into a straight line as kuroos body stiffened knowing he hadn’t been listening in the first place “ no wait which way I meant —which way “

“kuroo I said go left “

“ oh “

“ yeah — go left “ the strain in your boyfriends voice was evident

it showing off the sliver of annoyance he was trying to hold back knowing that you were somewhere in the same house

he hated for you to see him anything other than calm

Anytime he showed any bit of annoyance with you or even showed he was about to give you attitude you quickly shut it down. It was obvious to him who was the dominant one in the relationship and he had no problem with it

Honestly he was scared of what you would think when you finally saw him fly off the handle. Of course you’d seen him have an attitude he was a gamer that was normalized to have one after a lost game but, it wasn’t often he showed you that side because kenma doesn’t do losing

so what would happen if he finally got ticked off so badly due to something that was ‘just a game’ to you would you be scared?

he couldn’t help but think that you would run for the hills and then screw him over in the breakup and tell everyone he still wears tidy whities and forgets to go pee during gameplays unless you remind him by asking had he peed all day

“ hey du— “

“ don’t talk until you kill the leftover guys so we can win“

“ ken you don’t think I can multitask “ kuroos laugh fell into the room over kenmas headphones “ I used to do it everyday i was the captain of the vb team, I keep you in line “

“ sure sure — but are you watching your corners “

“ I keep everyone healthy , and i’m hot , plus I’m about to win this gam— I died “

the silence in the moment spoke volumes before kenma could

his hand grabbing the controller harshly as he refused to blink seeing the word loser flash in bright letters on his screen

Body growing hot and sweaty while he tried to hold in his anger and process what just happened so he could determine the next best course of action

Knowing , He just knew

The amount of trouble he’d get in if you walked in to hear him screaming at kuroo shouting words you hated when he used

He was trying to hold it all in

really he was

he just needed some quiet first just some silence to figure out how to calm himself down his brain going over serveral images of kuroo dead at the bottom of stairs maybe even him getting hit too hard with one of kenmas sets when they played 4 on 4matches

Anger only growing when he heard a voice pour in that he couldn’t figure out who it belonged to much less cared

“ hey ke— “

“ Do you ever fucking listen “ his voice was hard and threatening “ do you ever just shut the fuck up and “

he threw his headphones to his keyboard “ and listen — no you don’t— you go quiet and now here i am upset because you simply don’t listen — answer the questions i’m asking you— you fucking sea creature“

his body only growing hotter as his neck got red eyes darting for a person to scream at and take his anger out on

“ answer me “ he screamed pain eteched in his voice as he finally turned to find you

a look crossing over his face before he blinked looking to the floor then up at you in confusion before turning back to his screen that glowed in the dark room anger hitting him all over again when he saw kuroos wide open mouth and their dead avatars laying on the ground

“ Why the fuck — how the —- I always fucking lose when that asshole —that miscalculated creation— whenever he plays with me it’s so serious to me — i make money off of it i make — i get deals and i — I can’t — can’t lose them they’ll think i’m not good enough— i“

he slammed his fist into the wall speaking low

“ I hate fucking losing “

he turned to you “ it’s not nice y/n — I tried to fucking do your shitty routine of calming myself down first but it just “

he moved closer to you with anger pouring from his body

your eyes wide in a look of fear when he grabbed your face pointing to his screen “ look — “

he screamed in your face when you didn’t tear your eyes away from his “ BABE I SAID LOOK“

your eyes never leaving his as he just grew angrier at your incompetence

“ so your not fucking listening to me either “ his voice grew questioning “ are your ears dirty just like kuroos ? huh ? are y’all apart of some shitty cult for mute wannabes “

his hand gripped tighter on your cheeks “ i’m so stupid your just as fucking dumb as that asshole — fucking — I bet you wanna date him huh — “

his mind ran wild as he thought of the two of you together insecurity blooming

“ you want a loser like him over me right ? you have to like kuroo — look at him you want to date kuroo right “

he laughed “ fucking slu— “

“ finish it and we’ll be playing our own game of kenma getting his ass beat until he finally gives up and cries “

your eyebrows quirked up as you held eye contact with him “ trust me you’ll lose “

you looked at the male in front of you in disgust

“ get your shitty cheeto dusted gamer hands off of me “

his hands loosened their hold on you

“ all the way off you dirty imbecile “

you scoffed as he dropped his hand in a rush of fear

“ I bet your dirty ass didn’t even wash them after I made you pee earlier — yeah made — you wanted to get back to that sweaty chair that badly ? “

his cheeks grew hot as he blinked himself out of his trance only to see what he’d gotten himself into

“ who do you think you are talking to like that “

your stare making him shake even more in fear

You always scared him when you were upset wether you were taller or not your annoyance alone at an action he’d done scared him enough

Your words stood tall and poured in on him making him feel like he was suffocating but, he knew he needed to hear this. You only did this when his anger was out of control like he knew it could be. He stayed on his games all day and all night which was the only way to provide your shared income

at least until he could get his company up and running he had yet to sign contracts because he said he needed to read them first and reading took too much work

this was how he paid your bills. It stressed him out knowing that any day someone on the internet could call him a loser and that same day your steady flow of money may trickle in slower than usual

So when he lost a game any game even something as simple as Mario or even kirby it pissed him off because he couldn’t help but shoulder all the responsibility of taking care of you and himself. He didn’t want to be the reason you lost that stability and all of this catered into his rage. A rage only you could catch and calm down with your sheer words.

“ who do you think you are “ your voice came out low and calm as you spoke down on him “ answer me “

“n-no on — no one babe “

“ don’t babe me “ your hand pressed on his chest “ you don’t deserve that not after you talked to me that way “

“ I -i’m sorry “

“ for what “

“ f-for talking to you like that and “ his voice came out soft as he spoke

“ I cannot hear you “

“ fuck i’m sorry for talking to you that way —and for using force —force and grabbing you like that “

“and i’m just expected to forgive you? you know I hate this — you know this and yet you keep doing it? why ? why do you keep shouldering this and then lashing out “

“ p-please “

“ mm — i’m not seeing it ken— I mean you treat me like one of your other asshole friends and then on top of it you grabbed my face this time— you’ve never gone that far “

“ y-yes I know — I know “

“ so you can see my problem with just accepting your apology right “

“ y-yes ma’am “

“ oh — “ you laughed as you spoke “ now we’re using nice names huh “

“ i—I thought it’d work“ he pouted

“ I wanna forgive you ken “ you looked at him as his head dropped in embarrassment cheeks going red

“ I really do babe but “

“ I swear I won’t do it again y/n “

you thought for a moment staring at the boy in front of you who was pissing his pants in fear

“ y-y/n I swear I didn’t know it was you I was angry and I —I thought kuroo was talkin— “

“ but you realized it was me? “

he paused

“ you even looked from me and back to your screen so you knew correct “

“ yes “

“ and yet you still yelled at me and grabbed my face “

“ really i’m sorry— I wasn’t there all the way “

you took a deep breath before looking to his computer eyes made up in a squint and then trailing back to the boy in front of you

“ ok ken “ his eyes glowed in happiness

“ you— your forgiving me “ he laughed almost mocking you knowing he’d never been let go this quickly you usually took away his gaming system until he’d learned to calm down

he even started ‘doing’ yoga, if you count playing the youtube videos on the tv while he played on his apple watch that you’d forgotten to take, just to fool you into giving his game back “ this easily“

your eyes moved pointedly to his as he fell back into submission

“ i’m sorry I just meant you arent more upset “

“ well i’m deciding that since it was the first time you ever went to that extent of yelling at me I’m gonna let you off the hook “

you smiled “ also I thought you already got enough punishment “

“ h-huh “

you let your head move up to face his computer screen in a slight nod his eyes lighting up before his face fell in sadness

He never meant to fall submissive let alone show who was the dominant one in the relationship to anyone outside of you especially not with kuroo on the other line

“ I don’t think kuroo minds much babe it’s ok “ you said happily changing the whole way you carried yourself earlier and the way you spoke your body easing after beating into kenma

“ no trust me he doe— “

“ goddamn “

your eyes fell onto his friends open mouthed smile

“ and you just let ‘em do you like that “

kenmas eyebrows came together in sadness

“ damn ken —“

your eyes went hard on kuroo

“ and do you think your any better ? because from what i’ve heard churro it seems to me like you couldnt even keep your own team on a leash much less that lev kid so ? “

“ god “ kuroo coughed shifting in his seat whispering softly to himself “ so hot “

he shook his head before speaking again a little bit louder “ uh no— no I completely understand y/n —god i just know your fun “ he laughed

“ kenma keep listening to your s/o don’t mind me “

he moved to log off speaking under his breath “ so fucking scary —swear i’m bringing ‘em in to scare my vb kiddos— shit “

you shook your head in confusion “ uh wha—”

“ he had a — he had a crush on you and yeah I”

“ oh well “ you moved to throw your arms around him in happiness his body stumbling back at the action as he cautiously wrapped his hands around your back

“ n-not in trouble “

“ not in trouble “

“ still love me “

“ still love you “

“ then can I pla- “

“ no “

“ nevermind I didn’t want —want to play anyways “

“ that’s good “

“ yeah “ he drawed out as you grabbed his hand pulling him to the living room “ but babe the monitors still on just one matc— “

your grip tightned on his hand “ movie ken “

“ got it movie — movie “

he spoke low following you wrapping his arms around you as he kissed your cheek “ movie first — game later “

lev

-I don’t think he would ever ever ever scream at you but he would totally say something hurtful and not even realize it because kuroo and kenma said it to him

-so he’s literally just using what he was taught but In the wrong way

- not a time skip

“ lev can you help me “ you shouted to the taller male as you made your way across the court his hands cupping around his mouth as he stared down on you from the other side “ yeah “ he smiled “ totally “

you copied him a smile itching to spread across your face “ just because I yell doesnt mean you yell “

“ well as bossy as you are you should know I’m going to “

your face dropped before it fell back into a happy smile mind racing with thoughts of maybe hes just making a joke he knows you hate when people say that about you

“ hey uh lev ? “

“ yeah babe “ he said running over to you

“ let’s not say that ok cause it kinda — it really hurt my feelings “ his eyebrows furrowed as he looked down on you his voice vibrating along the gym before he smiled again “ babe I like the design you added to your face I didn’t notice but other people said you looked good with it and yeah —honestly they were right “

“ huh — design? “

“ yeah it’s red it’s right by your eyebrow “

your hands moved quickly to cover the pimple from his view eyes darting across the gym hoping no one else heard and was trying to take a look at it

“ it’s fine it’s fine maybe if you put on some makeup you can hide it right ? i mean if you don’t like the design like I do i mean that’s what you usually use it for right ? “

your eyebrows went up face holding nothing but sadness as you spoke “ do you— lev baby do you really think i’m bossy “

he jumped up and down on the balls of his feet in excitement as he kept going “ yeah — I do everything you tell me to and I like it i’m like a puppy and your the master “

you could feel your body heat up at his words his smile spreading wider as he turned to his awestruck teammates

“ babe it’s ok id follow you to the end of the earth because I don’t understand your just stringing me along”

your hands dropped the balls you held onto from picking them up off the floor. head cocking to the side as you studied him trying to see what sparked this new way of thinking

“ oh god “

“ he’s so fucking —so so fucking clueles- “

“ stupid just outright stupid is what he is “ you said as his eyebrows creased face struggling to find the right way to react to the burning hot anger he felt radiating off of you in waves “ lev baby who told you this “

you walked a bit closer to him head leaned back to see him clearly “ who made you think this way “

“ uh what “ he shook his head face coming up in a pout “ babe I — “ he played with his fingers as he looked off to the side hand moving to run across his neck “ for some reason I feel like i’m in trouble —I did—did I do something wrong baby ?“

“ this is not cool lev not helpful, not sweet and nice it’s hurtful “

“ no what ? wait i’m “ he took his hand out to grab your arm his face made up in pure confusion “ no i’m —i’m complimenting you “

“ you— your complimenting me? “

“ yeah “ he smiled struggling to hold it up as his eyes darted across your face

“ lev baby “ you faked a smile as your eyes hardened “ think about your words —what have you just said “

“ well I said that your my master and i’m like a puppy“ he smiled as he thought back “ only because I love you and would do anything you tell me and because i’m hyper and sometimes you have to explain stuff to me in simple form because I can’t pay attention when anyone else talks but you “

he kept going “ then I said that I do anything you tell me to and I would “ he smiled harder voice sure of himself“ because I like following you and making you happy “

he scratched his neck face flashing a deep red “ then — then I said that you cover up your bossine— ok i’m sorry “

his face made up into a pout as he slumped “ really I didn’t know I thought it was nice I heard the team saying it in the back rooms and I though— “

“ FUCKING IDIOT “

“ LEV WHAT THE FUCK “

“ HOLY SHIT LEGS ARE YOU SERIOUS “

levs face dropped as he turned to kenma “ legs seriously ? “

kenma shrugging as he continued to play his hand held game “ eh well everyone else was saying something and you annoy me so — I present legs “

he sighed as he turned back only to see your eyes holding nothing but garbage fires In them as you stared at the group of guys huddled together

“ speak “ everyone whimpered as you stared them down “ explain to me why my boyfriend is telling me I need makeup to cover my pimple ”

kuroos uncomfortable laugh left him quickly as he looked away from the both of you rocking back and forth in his shows “ well um y/n “ he coughed “ you see we were — we’re guys y/n we were making jokes and you see lev doesn’t understand “

“ well I do so explain “

he jumped “ we thought— “

“ not quick enough you sweaty catboy“

“ god ok he came to us wanting to know how to compliment you he said he didn’t want to say anything dumb and —so that made us realize we can really make him do anything cause he’s so clueless—thought if we could get lev to say some dumb shit—trust me we didn’t go that far “ he said pointing to lev who was picking up the balls you’d dropped on the floor chasing after one that rolled away

“ then you’d break up with him and I guess at least one of us would have a chance — well except kenma he says he has princess peach as his wife —wait who the fu—I actually don’t know who that is ken is that an online girlfriend “

he furrowed his brows actually puzzled by his earlier words “ I don’t know why it seemed so normal to me at the time “

he shook his head “ but lev is so fucking stupid that he said everything fucking wrong — we literally just told him what we personally like about you —gave him some corny pickup lines but he said everything wrong like even the phrase about your makeup we were saying how you don’t wear any or when you do it’s not obvious because your natural beauty just radiates through it— then the next thing we talked about is how strong and just how you take directive I guess — and we — we thought it was hot “

“ then where did he get the stuff he said from “ your voice went high now you were confused he couldn’t have made that stuff up

“ y/n he’s just fucking stupid where do you think “ he rolled his eyes “ he made it up because he didn’t understand “

levs eyes widened as he had stopped paying attention to the situation taking place hours ago “ uh I cannot confirm or deny that statement but I will say you are very very beautiful my love “

your heart warmed as the team groaned your body moving into his as you kissed him softly “ did I do something wrong ? “

“ no lev your ok “

“ ok I never want you to feel bad or like y’know how kenma feels I always feel like he’s so angry “ your boyfriend shivered as he locked eyes with kenma who was ready to pounce on him claws showed as he gripped his game harshly “ see —- so angry “

“ not angry lev just “ you looked at him seriously “ babe you have to pay attention to what you say you may say something really really wrong to me one day and then — “

“ and then you’ll tell me what I did wrong while we cuddle and drink hot chocolate“

you smiled squeezing him harder “ no — then i’ll break your kneecaps so you’ll never be able to play volley again and i’ll dye your hair black in your sleep so people will think you look like a tall dirty mop “

he shook before he led you out of the door the team watching as you left leaving all of them to curse silently about their failed plan “ he’s the stupidest guy on the team and he — he got that “

“ bet he doesn’t even know what he’s doing when he’s tapping it “

kuroo laughed “ yeah right like he even gets that far — they probably gotta explain how to continue a kiss without him focusing and staring straight into their eyes — he’s probably learning how to ‘multitask’ right now as we speak—lucky idiot “

the doors to the gym slammed open roughly a few minutes later as you held levs hand tightly behind the door “ HEY ASSHOLES “

everyone tuned to you in fear for themselves and the tall male behind you who you dragged like a mom in a store his eyes stuck on the lollipop that stuck out from his mouth “ guys y/n found me a lollipop—she stuffed it in my mouth when I told her the joke you guys told me to “

“ w-what joke “

“ the one where I called the sex line and said that I requested them because I heard good reviews “

the teams heads all dropped knowing they’d never said anything of the sort or even along the line he’d messed up their original words yet again and put not only himself but them in danger

“ if you guys ever try to taint my boyfriend with your dumb fucking words again I swear I will end you all —kenma i’ll buy every copy of the new game that you want that’s coming out — literally blow all my money so you can’t ever play the stupid game until im ready to allow you to “ his mouth going up in an o as he still had his attention on his game hands only tightening a bit at the threat his body moving behind kuroo for safety

“ kuroos chemistry lab will become a garbage chute for my lunch trays “ kuroos body slumping as he draped himself over kenma only to get pushed off and fall on the floor in pain your mouth moving to tell everyone else on the team what would happen if they didn’t respect your boyfriend and treat him like the nice , caring guy he was

Until finally you flashed a smile and walked off leaving the team in disarray as they couldn’t figure out if you just grew that much hotter or if they were having heat flash from the pissed off emotions they felt when lev turned around and winked at them while he ran his hand down your shoulder to land at your lower back as he followed you out

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deafeninggardenerpanda · 3 years

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Diamond Town became Chocolate Town. Though the huge wealth that the diamonds produced was gone, Chocolate Town was more crowded than ever before. The chocolate produced in the mine became a river and flowed into the Town of Wind, giving off a sweet scent that spread throughout the area. When news quickly spread of the all-you-can-eat, super luxury chocolate located there, tourists started to rush in.

Mr Fugo’s crimes being exposed, him being judged and receiving a heavy punishment—

None of it happened.

Thanks to the sweet scent of the chocolate, the hearts of the inhabitants of the Town of Wind have become calm. Soon, even when they went through hard times, they never sighed. Even when something was unpleasant, the finest chocolate made them laugh. Mr. Fugo's wrongdoings were tiny compared to that happiness. For Mr. Fugo, who loved to stand out, it might have been even worse than being dealt a heavy punishment.

He left the town as if not even there, forgotten by everyone.

"This time, I'll win at all—!" The one who came in and shouted was President Dedede piloting the Great King DDD XXIII. Kirby with the Warp Star, on the other hand, was calm and composed.

"It’ll be the same no matter how many times we do this! I'm winning today, too!"

And, another plane rushed in and cut between the two. It was a black airplane with purple streaks. The latest model aircraft with a sleek design, the "Halberd."

"Kirby, your time is over," Meta Knight murmured from the cockpit. "From now on, I'm the hero of the skies!"

The three planes swapped rankings rapidly in the unfolding climax of the race. Waddle Dee and Daroach looked up at the sky from the goal point in the field. The race course started from that field, went around town three times, and then returned. The planes passed over the two’s heads with a roar and once again flew off into the distance.

"Finally, it's the last lap. Kirby seems to have the advantage for now ... " Waddle Dee said.

"But? What?" Daroach asked. Waddle Dee replied with a serious expression.

"Since Lord Meta Knight joined the races, the two haven't had it easy like before. President Dedede has started pushing himself, doing special training with his rivals, and Kirby has been extending his record of consecutive wins for now, but what happens today ... maybe that record will stop!"

"Heh, is Meta Knight really that fast?"

"Extremely fast. However, he’s also a little ... um ... " Waddle Dee stumbled over his words, having difficulty forcing them out. "Um ... well, uh ... Does he know what safety is? ... I can't say ... "

"I see." Daroach shrugged. "He’s the same way when driving a car."

Soon, the three planes returned. The competition was fierce. If Kirby pulled ahead, President Dedede would follow, and of course, Meta Knight wouldn’t be left behind either.

"They’re almost head-to-head!" Waddle Dee shouted. "Oh, President Dedede came out in front! He did it! As expected from the president! The president’s first victory ...!? "

President Dedede's first victory was just around the corner. The improvements to the Great King DDD XXIII have shown their full potential. Of course, President Dedede trained after work and polished up his maneuvering skills as well. The results of that were about to be demonstrated.

Great King DDD XXIII pushed even further ahead. Kirby accelerated desperately, but he could no longer catch up. The goal was just around the corner! President Dedede shouted as he felt himself nearing the goal.

"I won—! Finally, I won against Kirby ...! "

... However.

The Halberd rushed in with incredible speed.

"Wahh! Stop it, Meta Knight! Too close! Uwaaagh!" President Dedede screamed hurriedly.

But it was no use. The Halberd couldn't stand its excessive acceleration and finally lost control. It violently collided with the Great King DDD XXIII and the Warp Star consecutively in the sky! The three planes fell collectively into the open field.

"I. Can’t. BELIEVE IT—!" President Dedede summoned all of his rage.

No wonder. He missed his first victory because of Meta Knight's reckless maneuvering. He escaped with a parachute just before crashing, so he wasn’t injured, but his anger at Meta Knight still did not subside. Meta Knight kept his cool as he apologized.

"I'm sorry, President Dedede. I messed up because I'm a beginner. I need to improve my maneuvering skills a little more."

"Even though you’re a beginner, that speed you put out—! You irresponsible, dangerous little—!"

"That's right! If Meta Knight didn't get in the way, I’d have been the one in first!" It was rare for Kirby to be so angry.

"Alright, calm down you lot. Let’s leave it at that," Daroach called out to the three glaring at each other.

"I’ll stay angry at this—!"

"Really? In that case, I guess these guys are all for me." Daroach took something out of a paper bag. It was a chocolate cake. "They’re a new creation of mine; a self-confident work that combines large strawberries and chocolate. But, I guess none of you want cake today. Maybe next time ... "

"Ack, wait, wait!" President Dedede quickly raised his voice. "Eat, I'll eat! What a delicious smell!"

"Me too! I’ll eat too~!" Kirby was about to drool at any moment. Meta Knight also leaned forward involuntarily. He cleared his throat.

"I'm not particularly interested, but you put a lot of effort into making them for us. It would be rude if I didn’t have some," he said.

"Come on, then. What are you waiting for? There’s good coffee, too."

Daroach handed everyone a cake. As soon as they had a bite, their faces shone. Meta Knight’s expression was unknown since he was wearing a mask, but it was as if he radiated happiness from his entire body.

"Delicious! It's the best, Daroach!" President Dedede smiled extraordinarily after having some, completely forgetting his anger. He opened his mouth and stuffed it with cake, smearing it everywhere in the process. Kirby and Waddle Dee looked at each other and laughed.

"So tasty!"

"Uh-huh!"

"I’ve had chocolate in a different town before, but it wasn’t anywhere near as delicious as this!"

"Aw ... you really think that?" Daroach mumbled happily. "After all, the cakes I make are the best ... " But Kirby shouted out loud, drowning out Daroach’s mumbles.

"It’s because everyone is eating together, I'm sure! Food is always more delicious when you have it with friends!" Daroach started laughing when he heard that.

"Haha, so that’s the reason. I’m defeated ... Oh, but I agree with that, too!"

The scent of chocolate and the sound of everyone’s laughter spread all throughout the field.

< Previous | Table of Contents

#kirby #king dedede #meta knight #waddle dee #daroach #Kirby: Search for the Dreamy Gears!#kirby light novel #translations

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blackhakumen · 3 years

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Mini Fanfic #791: Wrath of the Certified Moms (Super Smash Bros Ultimate)

4:23 p.m. at Smash Mansion's Dining Hall......

It was quiet and Intense afternoon at the Mansion of Smash as everyone hides away and watch an unfazed Kazuya have himself a conversation with the Certified Moms Squads, who are not very happy with him at the point.

Peach: Mr. Kazuya. (Crosses Her Arms in a Not Pleased Yet Professional Like Manner) I take it that you are wondering why we wanted to talk to you at this very moment, yes?

Kazuya: No. I don't actually. But since we're here.....(Slams Two of his Feet On the Table One By One) Let's talk.

Samus: What the hell are you doing?

Kazuya: (Raised an Eyebrow at the Bounty Hunter Glaring at Him) Pardon?

Daisy: (Glares at Kazuya as Well) You heard the lady, buster. Why the hell do you have your crumby feet on the table!?

Kazuya: What? Am I not supposed to do that here or something?

Rosalina: (Simply Nodded) That is right. It's very rude and thoughtless.

Isabella: Not to mention unsanitary.

Tifa: This might be our first time meeting one another.....(Glares at Kazuya Harsh) But I know for a fact that you weren't raised on a damn farm.

Samus: Exactly. So if you know what's good for you going forward....(Starts Gritting her Teeth) We suggest you take your feet off the fucking table. Right now.

Kazuya: (Starts at the Glaring for a Brief Second Before Scoffing a Bit in Defeat as He Reluctantly Did What He Was Told) There. Happy?

Samus: (Glare Pierce Harder at the Man) Very.

Peach: ('Sigh') Now with that out of the way, Mr. Kazuya, after you fought Ganondorf and threw him off a cliff, is it true that you tried to do the same to Pit and Kirby afterwards?

Kazuya: What? You mean the Angel Boy and Pink Puffball? ('Heh') Yeah. I did. What of it?

Palutena: (Immediately Gets Up and Angrily Slams her Hands on the Table) ('SLAM') WHAT OF IT!? YOU ALMOST KILLED MY BABY, YOU MURDEROUS PIECE OF-

Bayonetta: (Immediately Got Up and Place Her Hands on Palutena's Shoulders to Calm her Down) Paulie dear, please. Calm yourself.

Tifa: (Gently Place her Hand on Top of Palutena's) Bayo's right. Don't let him get to you like this.

Palutena: How can you all expect me to be calm in a time like that!? (Tears Starts Falling Down on her Face) Have you forgotten what that bastard done to Pit!?

Peach: (Turns Around to Palutena with a Worried yet Understanding Frown on her Face) We understand how you feel completely, dear. Which is all the more reasons why you should let me do all the talking. You do trust us, right?

Palutena: Of course I do. ('Sniff') You girls are my family...('Sniff') I just....I just can't help not being upset, you know?

Bayonetta: (Gently Pulls Palutena into a Loving Hug) I know, my sweet, beautiful goddess. I know. But we all need to pull ourselves together and get Peach handle this. For our babies sake.

Palutena begins to looks up and see Pit, Kirby, and the Phantom Thieves hiding behind the living room's wall, witnessing everything going down in the dining hall.

Palutena: (Sighs While Finally Calming Herself Down) Right. I do need to pull myself together. (Turns to Pit While Quietly Saying 'I Love You' to Him With a Sad Smile Before Sitting Back Down)

Pit: (Smiles Softly) I love you too, mom

Kazuya: (Suddenly Starts to Chuckle Evilly For Almost Everyone in the Mansion to Hear)

Peach: (Raised an Eye Brow at Kazuya in a Very Unamused Manner) Something's funny to you, Kazuya?

Kazuya: Yes, actually. Here I thought participating in this kind of tournament would be somewhat interesting. I'd never imagined how pathetically soft amd weak minded all of you really are. But I suppose be too shouldn't be surprised by the outcome, since you have an embarrassment of a tyrant king and an annoying puffball as one of your competitors.

Ganondorf: (Growling Angry at Kazuya from the Distance With the Other League of Villains Members)

Kazuya: And worthless angel boy of yours was easily the weakest of them all that it's laughable at best.

Pit starts to frown sadly by Kazuya's words until Ren place a hand onto his shoulder while giving him a reassuring look that feels him to not to believe a single word he says. This, in it if itself, actually helps calm the angel down immensely.

Kazuya: Hell, he's better off being dead if any-

'CRASH'

Without a second thought, Peach angrily punched down the table I front of her, the ladies, and Kazuya so hard that it crumbles to the ground, easily breaking it into small, tiny pieces, much everyone's surprise and shock.

Bowser: Holy........

Samus: ........Shit........

Ryuji: (From the Living Room) EXCLAMATION MARK!!!!

Kazuya: (Starts Smirking at the Angered Princess While Being Unfazed by the Sudden Event) What's this now? Did I do finally struck a nerve, your highness?

Peach: (Immediately Grabs Kazuya By the Collar While Giving the Most Darkest, Piercing Glare Imaginable, Even For Her) Listen here, you insufferable, arrogant creep! I don't what made you the way you are right now, and frankly, I don't give a single damn about it at this point! All you need to know that if you're planning on continuing to set foot in this mansion, you don't EVER insult my babies and harm my family ever again! YOU HEAR ME!?

Daisy: (Immediately Got Up to Calm Peach Down) Woah there, cuz. Take it easy for us, okay?

Samus: (Got Up and Calm Peach Down as Well) Daisy's right, Peach. He's not worth the trouble at this point......

Peach looks back and forth the girls and Kazuya for a few seconds before finally calming herself down.

Peach: ('Sighs in Defeat') Okay......(Finally Let's Go of Kazuya) I suppose I should apologize for what happened just now. It wasn't lady like of me.

Daisy: (Chuckles Lightly) Are you kidding me? That was most badass thing I've ever seen yet! (Happily Hugs Peach) And it was all caused by my favorite cuz~

Peach: (Giggles Softly) I'm your only cousin, Daisy.

Samus: Yeah I'm gonna have to agree with Daisy this on. (Smirks a bit Playfully at Peach) I did not expect you to be this hardcore. I'm proud. Though, I think we might need to replace that table in a little bit.

Peach: (Giggles Softly Some More) I know. Thanks, you guys.

Kazuya: (Watches the Trio While Fixing his Collar and Shirt) ('Tch') Knew I should've ignored them if I had the chance.......

Peach: Kazuya Mishima!

Kazuya: (Turns Back to Peach) Yeah? What?

Peach: (Crosses her Arms While Glaring Darkly at Kazuya Again) Remember this well: If I EVER hear you pulled this stunt again, I will NOT hesitate to kick you out of this mansion and ban you from ever taking part of this tournament! Do you understand me!?

Kazuya was able to say something to the princess until his eyes suddenly begins to widened, as he comes to the realization that Peach's glare is starting to remind him of a woman from past. Who happens to be his deceased mother, Kazumi Mishima. It wasn't too long until he suddenly begins to get down on his knees and bow himself down to the princess in a traditional like manner, much everyone complete surprise.

Kazuya: I apologise for my foolish actions. It will never happen again.....

Peach: (Couldn't Believe What She's Seeing in Front of Her) Oh my.......I-I Mean! (Starts Clearing Her Throat Before Turning Away From the Fallen Man) As long as you got message, we'll hold you to it. Let's go, ladies. (Begins to Walks Away with Other Ladies Following Her)

Palutena gives one last harsh glare at Kazuya before walking away with the others. Leaving him to his lonesome self altogether. (While Still Being in a Bowing like Position).

Meanwhile.....

Bowser: (Eyes Widened After Witnessing Everything That Went Down Just Now) Well.........That happened?

Hades: (Starts Snicking) I know, right? Who would've thought the Devil Boy got whipped so easily?

Sephiroth: (Carrying Pichu in his Arms) I'm more surprise on how strong the princess has gotten. Mario's a lucky man.

Bowser: ('Tch') (Crosses his Arms While Looking Away) Yeah. Lucky jackass, bastard.....

Ganondorf: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Ridley: (Turns to Ganondorf) What gotten you in a good mood?

Ganondorf: Seeing this warm grovelling on the floor! (Crosses his Arms While Smirking Evilly and Triumphantly) Knew he wasn't shit from the beginning.

Ridley: But didn't he still beat you and threw you off a cliff?

Ganondorf: (Slowly Turns to Ridley with a Deadpinned Glare) Do you want me throw you off a cliff instead, Ridley?

Ridley: ('Sigh') No.......

Bowser: (Looking at Kazuya Shaking Slightly in the Ground From a Distance) Uhh....Guys? I think the new guy's crying over here. Saying about missing his mom or whatever.....

Hades: Ah yeah. Forgot to mention this sooner, but his mom died when he was little. Just found that one out when I was reading his inner thoughts earlier. So.....oops.

Sephiroth: The loss of a loving mother is never an easy feeling. He has my pity.

Pichu: (Nodded in Agreement) Pika. Pi.

Ganondorf: ('Scoffs') He can cry about her all he wants. (Starts Walking Away) He'll no sympathy from me.

Elsewhere in the Fitness Gym.......

Ike: (Paused his Training Session For a Moment) Hm?......... (Shrugs Before Resuming his Workout)

@keyenuta

@princekirijo

@caleb13frede

@cyber-wildcat

@26shann

@ma-lemons

@albion-93

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uhhlucid · 2 years

Text

Pt. 3

pairing: tanaka x oc

synopsis: Ayano Shimizu is the perfect student, the perfect daughter, and everyone looks up to her. Her only problem is Tanaka keeps playing with her heart.

word count: 1.4k

warnings: heartbreak lol i luv crushing hearts

type: fanfic

a/n: one of my old stories so might be some mistakes loool but enjoy^^

The others got off at the stop closest to Ayano's house, but Ayano and Tanaka remained on the train. "I'm glad you agreed to go with me," Ayano told Tanaka as she grabbed his hand. "Why wouldn't I go with you? Arcades are super fun."

Tanaka took Ayano's hand into his as they exited the train. They stopped at a convenience store right outside the train station before heading to the arcade.

Tanaka insisted they get slushies since they were cheap at this particular store. Ayano had no room to argue since he was paying for hers as well.

Since it was Sunday, the arcade was pretty crowded. Tanaka kept Ayano close to him as he maneuvered through the crowd to purchase a game card.

"Hey Tanaka let's do that first." Tanaka turned to look at what Ayano was so excited about and it was a mario kart game.

"Totally, how many credits should I put on the card?" "Maybe 80, but c'mon before someone gets to the game first." Ayano grabbed Tanaka's arm and dragged him over to the game.

She excitedly swiped the card for the game and sat down. Tanaka sat beside her and swiped the card next. After selecting their cars, the game began.

Tanaka was surprised at how good Ayano was at the game. He hadn't taken the game seriously, but now he had to. He watched in horror as Ayano sped past him and reached the finish line first.

"Wow Tanaka. Who would've thought I'm better than you at mario kart." "I demand a rematch. There's no way you beat me." Ayano shrugged but agreed and swiped the card again.

This time, Tanaka paid more attention to the game and even managed to drive Ayano off the road. Passing the finish line, he got out of the chair, "See I am better at mario kart. Who's the loser now?"

"Tanaka your scaring the kids." Tanaka turned around to see two kids waiting behind him to get onto the game. He apologized and followed Ayano to a booth.

"Wanna do basketball next? I'll totally beat you in that too." Ayano gave him a mischievous smile, "You think your going to win? Alright let's play." Ayano followed Tanaka to the back of the arcade where the basketball game was.

Swiping the card, Tanaka selected the two player option. Ayano and Tanaka both attempted to throw the balls in the moving basket. In the end, both of them ended up with zero points.

"Told ya you wouldn't beat me." "You didn't even score so it doesn't count," Tanaka replied heading towards the skeet ball machine. "But you didn't score either." Tanaka swipes the card and is determined to beat Ayano.

Successfully, he managed to throw the ball into the highest scoring hole earning him nearly twice as many tickets as the racing game. "Hey no fair you totally cheated." "Looks like someone's just a sore loser," Tanaka teased.

"Am not, you can't use your volleyball skills in an arcade game." He sticks his tongue out in a teasing way, "I'm just the best wing spiker in the history of wing spikers."

"Hey wanna see if we have enough tickets for a toy?" Ayano asked tugging Tanaka's arm towards the little gift store. He let Ayano lead him to the store where an enthusiastic worker smiled widely at them.

"How about we get water guns?" Tanaka asked pointing to the matching blue and red water guns hanging up on the wall behind the counter. Ayano shrugged, "If we can't afford it, how about matching kirby plushies?"

Tanaka walked up to the woman at the register. Her blonde ponytail swung as she spoke, "What can I help you with today?"

"I wanna know how much those guns cost." Her ponytail swung aggressively as she turned around. "About 5,000 tickets." Tanaka sighed, "And what about the two kirby plushies?"

"Together they're about 3,000." "C'mon Tanaka we only have like 4'000 tickets. Plus, we can buy water guns for like five dollars at the convenience store."

"Fine, I'll take the two kirby plushies." The cashier rang him up as he spent the remaining tickets on various candy. An elated Ayano happily took her prize from the cashier.

Tanaka couldn't be annoyed when Ayano was happy. He thanked the cashier and took her hand in his. They half skipped half walked back to the train station.

"Thank you for all the fun I had today, Tanaka." Tanaka swiped his student id after Ayano, "I had a lot of fun too. Your still coming to my game tomorrow, right?"

Ayano shrugs, "Guess we'll have to wait and see." They both entered the train and took the nearest seats. Ayano hoped her mother wasn't too upset that she was coming back so late.

The train ride lasted fifteen minutes and Tanaka made sure to walk Ayano right up to her doorstep. "The bus leaves at 4 if your coming."

Tanaka planted a quick kiss on the top of Ayano's forehead. Ayano struggled to speak as her face slowly became the same shade as a ripe tomato, "Goodnight Tanaka."

"And don't forget to bring your friends," Tanaka called waving as he headed for his own house. The male tried to hide his very obvious blush as he walked home.

He was surprised Ayano was even going to his game. His phone lit up signaling he got a text. Wonder who it could be, he thought to himself.

⊱ ──────ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ────── ⊰

Monday July 28th

Ayano payed close attention to the clock, waiting for it to strike three thirty. "Ayano at least try to hide the fact your excited." Ayano glanced up from her notebook to see Saori looking back at her.

"Sorry, just can't wait. Plus summer break is literally next week." Saori turned around fully in her chair, "We should totally go to this new roller rink in Tokyo the day after exams. I heard a lot of second years are going."

"So it'll be like a hangout? Could we invite Okazaki and Kimura then?" Saori shrugs, "If they want to come." "Miss. Saito please face the front."

Saori sighed then turned back around in her chair. Ayano checked the clock again. Thirty seconds until school was over for the day. She closed her notebook and slowly slid her pencils back into her pencil case.

"Alright class, remember exams are Friday and Saturday." Ayano quickly gathered her things and raced towards the gym. Saori ran after her, not bothering to say goodbye to Kimura and Okazaki first.

"Ayano, you know I'm not fit for all this running." "Shh Saori. They'll hear you." Saori followed Ayano inside the gym where a few of the third years were already gathered.

"Hey Ayano! Nice to see you could make it. Who's this?" "This is my best friend, Saori Saito. And Saori, this is the captain Daichi Sawamura."

Daichi extended his hand towards Saori. While they chatted, Ayano glanced around the gym. She didn't remember the other third years names since Tanaka never really introduced them to her.

"Well Tanaka isn't here yet. The bus leaves in about ten minutes though so your welcome to get on." "We should find your brother since he wanted to tag along." "He's probably at the baseball field. I'll go get him."

Ayano nods and sits in the bleachers. She was hoping she would be able to ask Tanaka on another date considering the last one went so well. Did this count as a date? She wasn't sure, but she hoped it did.

A tall blonde followed by a shorter boy with freckles were the next to come in the gym. They introduced themselves as Yamaguchi and Tsukishima before leaving for the bus.

Nishinoya, Tanaka, and Kazuo were right behind them followed by an annoyed Saori. "Ayano I found my old jersey so you could wear it to the game today."

Ayano took the jersey and wore it right over her shirt. She gave the others a twirl before sitting back down. "Has anyone seen Kageyama and Hinata?" Daichi asked the others. "I saw them on the bus on the way over here," Nishinoya replied.

Daichi nodded and grabbed his bag, "Coach said he would be on the bus." The other two third years followed Daichi and the five of you trailed after them. Ayano assumed Kiyoko and Yachi were already on the bus.

Ayano sat in the back with Saori since Saori didn't want to sit next to Kazuo. "How long is this game going to be exactly?" Ayano shrugged, "Probably a few hours. I looked up the place and they have this shopping plaza down the street."

"I don't want to watch musty boys run around for hours ya know." "Who knows maybe you'll find someone." Saori waved Ayano off, "Doubt it since I already found people I'm interested in."

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incorrectsmashbrosquotes · 3 years

Text

Byleth teaches the Smash Kids

*Female Byleth walks into a classroom where all the Smash Bros kids are causing a ruckus*

Byleth: Everyone, settle down! It’s time for class! Now children, find your seats!

Joker, pointing to his butt: Got my seat.

Pit, pointing to his butt: Got mine.

Leaf, pointing to hers: Here’s mine.

Dark Pit: Bet you don’t have trouble finding yours.

Byleth: Go to your desks!

*All the kids sit down at a desk*

Byleth: Now children, this is a serious class, and I expect you all to follow the rules at all times. Let me also warn you that I will tolerate no foolishness. Are we clear?

Ness: No, we’re opaque.

*Ness snaps his fingers, and suddenly all the kids are see-through*

Ness: Now we’re clear.

Byleth: Ugh! Let us begin.

Lucas: Wait! Don’t you want to see our homework first?

Byleth: How can you have homework? This is the first day of school.

Meggy: Extra credit.

*An angelic halo magically appears over all the kid’s heads*

Byleth: Let me see it.

Red: You can’t. Our dog ate it.

Byleth: Don’t lie!

Pit: We’re not lying. See?

*Bowser Jr. is in the corner, on all fours, chewing on several pieces of paper. Byleth then begins playing tug-of-war with Bowser Jr. over the papers*

Byleth: Bad dog! Give me that! Give! Give it now!

*Bowser Jr. then releases the papers, causing Byleth to trip and land on her rear end. Bowser Jr. then returns to his desk*

Byleth: I’m warning you! Don’t make me use corporal punishment!

Joker: You mean him?

*Joker gestures to Captain Falcon, who is wearing a U.S Army Corporal’s uniform with a nametag reading ‘Punishment’. Byleth laughs nervously before regaining her composure*

Byleth: Let us begin with our lessons. We’ll start with math. Ness, can you count to one hundred?

Ness: One, two, skip a few, ninety nine, one hundred!

Byleth: No. Give me all the numbers.

Ness: Hey, there’s only so much room on each of these Tumblr posts.

Byleth: Let’s move on. Young Link, can you multiply?

*Young Link suddenly summons all the various Links from across the Zeldaverse*

All the Links: How’s this?

Byleth: Not that sort of multi-! Let’s leave math, shall we? We’ll move on to science. Nana, what can you tell me about the great scientists of the 18th century?

Nana: They’re all dead.

Byleth: No, no, no!

Nana: Alright, they’re all living.

Byleth: NO, NO, NO!

Mega Man: Well, now we’re getting into philosophy.

Byleth: We’re not getting into…! We’ll move on to grammar. Dark Pit, what is the meaning of the word 'procrastination’?

Dark Pit, leaning back into his chair with his feet on his desk: I’ll tell you tomorrow.

Byleth: You children are making this very difficult!

Lucas: Well, learning isn’t easy.

Byleth: We’ll move on to sentence structure. First: verbs. Joker, can you conjugate?

Joker: Well, yes, but I already have a girlfriend.

Byleth: No, no, no! It’s easy. I’ll conjugate with you.

Joker: Goodnight, everybody!

Byleth: You don’t understand. let me go to the board and show you.

Joker, turning to the other kids: Don’t look.

*Byleth goes to the chalkboard to explain conjugation to the class. Each time she has her back turned, the kids mess around with each other. Only when Byleth looks directly at her class are they seated and paying attention. Eventually, she gets fed up with this*

Byleth: I know what you’re doing. I have eyes in the back of my head.

Popo: Really? So do we.

*All the kids turn around revealing that they, quite literally, have a pair of eyes in the back of their heads. All except Ness, who has twenty eyes in the back of his head. Byleth looks confused for a moment before addressing the class again*

Byleth: It’s time for a pop quiz.

*Leaf places a blindfold around Red’s eyes. She then places two different cans of sodapop on Red’s desk*

Byleth: What are you doing?!

Leaf: Pop quiz.

*Red quickly gulps down the two cans of soda*

Red: I like the first one better.

*Red then lets out a massive belch, making all the kids break out in laughter. Byleth has finally lost her temper*

Byleth: STOP THAT! STOP THAT!! Sit at your desks this instant!

*As all the kids sit down, Byleth pulls a marker out of the front of her shirt*

Joker: Ooh, what else you got in there?

Byleth: WHY YOU LITTLE..!!!

*Byleth uses the marker to write a big fat ’F’ on Joker’s forehead*

Byleth: YOU GET AN ’F’!

Meggy: Hey! You can’t do that to him!

*Byleth goes up to Meggy and writes an ’F’ on her forehead*

Byleth: 'F’!

*Meggy starts to cry at her failing grade while the other students laugh at her misfortune. Their laughter doesn’t last long, though, as Byleth writes an ’F’ on each of their foreheads, one by one, until there is only one left: Kirby*

Byleth: 'F’!

*After being given the same failing grade as all his peers, and well as the forehead mark to go with it, Kirby’s face grows incredibly angry*

Pit: Oh, now you’ve gone and hurt his feelings.

Mega Man: I’d apologize if I were you.

Byleth: I will not! You’re all horrid, naughty children!

*Kirby’s temper tantrum grows worse and worse as he approaches Byleth with a look of utter fury. Byleth actually looks afraid as Kirby finally stands in front of her*

SpongeBob narrorator: One dissolve cut later.

*Robin enters Byleth’s classroom, finding it empty*

Robin: Hey Byleth. How was your first day teaching at Smash?

Kirby, using his copy ability to mimic Byleth’s hair: Poyo!

Robin: Well, that’s good. Hope the kids didn’t give you too much trouble. See you tomorrow.

*As soon as Robin leaves, Kirby discards his copy ability as all the kids jump out of convenient hiding places*

Joker: Alright, everyone! Time for recess!

*All the kids yell and cheer in excitement while running outside to play*

*Meanwhile, inside Kirby’s endless void of a stomach*

Byleth: I hate teaching.

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creepingsharia · 4 years

Text

92% of New Muslim Candidates Won’t Express Support for Constitution

3 out of 36 (92%) Muslim American candidates who appeared to be seeking public office for the first time

92% of New Muslim Candidates Won’t Express Support for Constitution; One MN Republican Makes it Bipartisan

By Stephen M. Kirby

It is not appropriate to label all, or even the majority of those, who question Islam and Muslims as Islamophobes. ~ (CAIR Report 2013, Legislating Fear: Islamophobia and its Impact in the United States, p. ix)

In January 2020, I wrote about the results of a survey I had done in which I presented four questions to eighty Muslim public officials across the United States; each question asked the Muslim public official to choose between following the U.S. Constitution/our man-made laws or Islamic Doctrine. An eye-opening 93% of these Muslim public officials would not express support for the U.S. Constitution or our man-made laws. Of the six who did express this support, only two allowed me to mention their name.[1]

I also submitted these same four questions to seven prominent Muslim Americans who have been publicly aspiring to reform Islam; I sent four similar questions, based on Canadian law, to six prominent Muslim Canadians who had also been publicly aspiring to reform Islam. Of these thirteen aspiring reformers, only two Muslim Americans and one Muslim Canadian responded saying they supported man-made laws over the commands of Allah and the teachings of Muhammad.[2]

I then decided to submit the same four questions to 36 Muslim American candidates who appeared to be seeking public office for the first time.[3]

We shall first look at the four questions I used and then examine the variety of responses I received from those Muslims seeking public office. I then list the Muslim candidates, by State, who did not respond. This is followed by my concluding remarks.

The Questions

On February 10, 2020, I sent the following e-mail to a group of 36 Muslims who were running, or had been running, for public office at various levels of government across the United States; on February 17th I sent it again to the Muslims who had not initially responded:[4]

I have written extensively about Islam (six books and numerous articles and brochures) and think it important that non-Muslims gain a better understanding of Islam.

If you are elected to public office you will take an oath of office that includes swearing, or affirming, to support the United States Constitution. With that in mind, I am interested in your response, as a candidate who follows the religion of Islam, to the following questions:

No. 1: Will you go on record now and state that our 1st Amendment right to freedom of speech gives the right to anyone in the United States to criticize or disagree with your prophet Muhammad, and will you also go on record now and state that you support and defend anyone’s right to criticize or disagree with your prophet Muhammad, and that you condemn anyone who threatens death or physical harm to another person who is exercising that right?

No. 2: Our 1st Amendment guarantees freedom of religion in the United States. As part of that freedom, anyone in the United States has the right to join or leave any religion, or have no religion at all. Will you go on record now and state that you support and defend the idea that in the United States a Muslim has not only the freedom to leave Islam, but to do so without fear of physical harm, and will you also go on record now and state that you condemn anyone who threatens physical harm to a Muslim who is exercising that freedom?

No. 3: According to the words of Allah found in Koran 5:38 and the teachings of your prophet Muhammad, amputation of a hand is an acceptable punishment for theft. But our U.S. Constitution, which consists of man-made laws, has the 8th Amendment that prohibits cruel and unusual punishment such as this. Do you agree with Allah and your prophet Muhammad that amputation of a hand is an acceptable punishment for theft in the United States, or do you believe that our man-made laws prohibiting such punishments are true laws and are to be followed instead of this 7th Century command of Allah and teaching of Muhammad?

No. 4: According to the words of Allah found in Koran 4:3, Muslim men are allowed, but not required, to be married to up to four wives. Being married to more than one wife in the United States is illegal according to our man-made bigamy laws. Do you agree with Allah that it is legal for a Muslim man in the United States to be married to more than one woman, or do you believe that our man-made laws prohibiting bigamy are true laws and are to be followed instead of this 7th Century command of Allah?

I look forward to your responses.

Support for the U.S. Constitution

Only three Muslim candidates clearly stated that they would support the U.S. Constitution/our man-made laws over Islamic Doctrine; they each gave me permission to use their name:

Deedra Abboudd (D), Maricopa County Board of Supervisors, Arizona

Iman-Utopia Layjou Bah (I), U.S. House of Representatives (AZ-2)

Rashid Malik (D), U.S. House of Representatives (GA-7)

Other Replies

I received various replies from five other Muslim candidates:

Leila Shukri Adan (D), U.S. House of Representatives (MN-5): On February 17th Adan responded to my second e-mail:

Thank you so much for your email and for the reminder. I am confirming receipt and will get back to you soon!

I have not heard back from Adan.

Muhammad Arif (D), United States Senate, Arizona: Arif responded the same day to the February 10th e-mail. He asked if we could meet for coffee or lunch to discuss the questions. I explained that I lived too far away for that. We exchanged several additional e-mails, and on February 11th he wrote:

Since you do not live in Arizona and I’m busy in my campaign because I have limited time … can I email you these answer [sic] next week … I apologize for delay [sic] because the questions I have to read carefully and answer in details [sic]

I replied that would be fine. The “next week” came and went, and on February 22nd I sent him an e-mail asking when I could expect his responses. I have not heard back from Arif.

Zainab Baloch (D), Mayor of Raleigh, North Carolina: Baloch lost the 2019 general election to become the Mayor of Raleigh. However, her subsequent social postings appeared to indicate that she was in politics for the long haul; she had written: “This isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon.” On February 17th she responded to my second e-mail:

I didn’t miss it [my first e-mail]. If I have time to respond to your harassing questions, I will. Have a great week!

I have not heard back from Baloch.

Ameena Matthews (D), U.S. House of Representatives (IL-1): On February 24th, in reply to my second e-mail, I received the following from Dr. La’Shawn Littrice, Matthews’ Campaign Manager:

Hi, Steve. How are you? I will forward this to Dr. Matthews and get it back to you by Wednesday [February 26th] of this week.

On February 28th I sent Littrice an e-mail asking her for an update. I have not heard back from Littrice.

Reem Subei (D), Ohio State Senate: In response to each of the two e-mails I sent Subei, I received the following form response:

Thank you for contacting Reem for Ohio. This campaign is about bringing justice and equality to all. Please click the link below to provide us with your preferred volunteering activity. Let’s build a system that works for everyone, because we all win when we all win.

The link takes one to a form for volunteers to complete. I have received no other response from Subei.

No Reply

These Muslim candidates did not reply:

California

Kaisar Ahmed (Nonpartisan) – San Bernardino County Board of Supervisors

Shahid Buttar (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (CA-12)

Fatima Shahnaz Iqbal-Zubair (D) – California State Assembly

Cenk Uygur (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (CA-25)

Colorado

Iman Jodeh (D) – Colorado State House of Representatives

Delaware

Madinah Wilson-Anton (D) – Delaware State House of Delegates

Georgia

Nabilah Islam (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (GA-7)

Illinois

Junaid “J” Afeef (D) – Kane County State’s Attorney

Rush Darwish (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (IL-3)

Mohammed Faheem (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (IL-8)

Sarah Gad (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (IL-1)

Inam Hussain (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (IL-8)

Moon Khan (D) – Circuit Court Clerk, DuPage County

Azam Nizamuddin (D) – Circuit Judge, Circuit Court of DuPage County

Abdelnasser Rashid (D) – Cook County Board of Review

Maryland

Saafir Rabb (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (MD-7)

Massachusetts

Ihssane Leckey (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (MA-4)

Nichole Mossalam (D) – Massachusetts State House of Representatives

Michigan

Solomon Rajput (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (MI-12)

Minnesota

Dalia Al-Aqidi (R) – U.S. House of Representatives (MN-5)

Omar Fateh (D) – Minnesota State Senate

New Jersey

Alp Basaran (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (NJ-9)

New York

Tahanie Aboushi (D) – Manhattan District Attorney

Shaniyat Chowdhury (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (NY-5)

Mary Jobaida (D) – New York State Assembly

Badrun Nahar Khan (D) – U.S. House of Representatives (NY-14)

Zohran Kwame Mamdani (D) – New York State Assembly

Ohio

Mohamud Jama (D) – Ohio State House of Representatives

Conclusion

These 36 Muslim Americans seeking public office would have to, if successful, take an oath of office that includes swearing (or affirming) to support the U.S. Constitution. In theory then, one would think such Muslim Americans would be quite willing even now to express their support for that Constitution and our man-made laws. The fact that 92% of them would not take this opportunity to express that support is troubling.

Troubling, but not surprising. As we saw earlier, 93% of current Muslim public officials and 77% of aspiring Muslim reformers also declined to make such a choice. This, in spite of the fact that anyone holding a public office in the United States is required to take an oath to support the U.S. Constitution and our man-made laws, and we regularly hear from aspiring Muslim reformers that Islamic Doctrine needs to be modernized and made more compatible with Western laws. But when faced with specific choices, instead of glittering generalities, 91% of all the Muslims listed in these three categories would not express support for Western laws over Islamic Doctrine.

One might wonder if it is fair to ask Muslims to make such a choice. It certainly is because of the irreconcilable conflict between major tenets of Islamic Doctrine and Western Laws, especially the U.S. Constitution.[5]

Here is an additional consideration. In its 2020 ‘Muslim Vote Campaign’ the Council on American Islamic Relations (CAIR) has included a questionnaire asking non-Muslim candidates and government officials whether or not they support specific “Muslim needs.” CAIR explained:

CAIR’s 2020 questionnaire is an update to its 2016 questionnaire and provides sample questions for Muslims to ask local city council, mayoral, state legislative, gubernatorial, and congressional candidates running for office and government officials.

Candidate responses to CAIR’s election questionnaire will assist American Muslims in evaluating each candidate’s leadership criteria and their ability to unite and engage the community on policies and programs that meet Muslim needs.

The questions and the issues included in the questionnaire emphasize the American Muslim community’s concerns, as well as those of its civil rights, immigrant rights and worker rights allies.[6]

Here is a sampling of the issues about which the American Muslim community is concerned:[7]

1. Do you plan to address the rise in Islamophobia and hateful rhetoric towards Muslims in the United States?

2. Do you support the right of Muslim inmates to make religious accommodation requests for religious headwear, like hijabs, kufis, and other head coverings?

3. Do you support the right of Muslim inmates to make religious accommodation requests for copies of the Quran and other religious texts, prayer mats, prayer beads, and other religious items?

4. Do you support the right of Muslim inmates to make religious accommodation requests for modified meal schedules while fasting during Ramadan?

5. Do you support the right of Muslim inmates to make religious accommodation requests for daily congregational prayers and Friday religious services?

6. Do you support public school systems with significant Muslim populations in your congressional district and/or state closing for the Muslim holidays of Eid al-Fitr and Eid al-Adha, when many students or faculty would otherwise be absent?

The focus of CAIR’s questions is on the need for non-Muslims to accommodate certain Islamic religious teachings. Since CAIR has turned the focus on certain Islamic religious teachings, it is only appropriate that the focus should now be turned on all Islamic religious teachings, especially those that are irreconcilably in conflict with the U.S. Constitution and our man-made laws. Muslims running for and holding public office need to be asked about these conflicts and expected to publicly, categorically choose between the U.S. Constitution/our man-made laws and those contradictory teachings of their religion.

We need to pay heed to these words of Winston Churchill from 1940:

This is no time for ease and comfort. It is the time to dare and endure.

Dr. Stephen M. Kirby is the author of six books about Islam. His latest book is Islamic Doctrine versus the U.S. Constitution: The Dilemma for Muslim Public Officials.

[1] Stephen M. Kirby, “93% of Muslim Public Officials Would Not Express Support for the Constitution They Swore to Uphold,” Jihad Watch, January 7, 2020, https://www.jihadwatch.org/2020/01/93-of-muslim-public-officials-would-not-express-support-for-the-constitution-they-swore-to-uphold.

[2] Stephen M. Kirby, “The Adventures of Asking Muslim Reformers to Categorically Choose between Western Laws and Islam,” Jihad Watch, January 16, 2020, https://www.jihadwatch.org/2020/01/the-adventures-of-asking-muslim-reformers-to-categorically-choose-between-western-laws-and-islam.

[3] I would like to thank Deplorable Kel for a majority of these names: https://deplorablekel.com/category/u-s-elections/2020-election/.

[4] These questions were taken from Chapter 10 of my latest book, Islamic Doctrine Versus the U.S. Constitution: The Dilemma for Muslim Public Officials (Washington DC: Center for Security Policy Press, 2019); https://www.centerforsecuritypolicy.org/2019/12/03/csp-press-releases-primer-on-islamic-doctrine-versus-the-u-s-constitution/.

[5] For details about this irreconcilable conflict see Islamic Doctrine Versus the U.S. Constitution: The Dilemma for Muslim Public Officials. For ways in which Islamic Doctrine allows Muslims to appear to take an oath to support the U.S. Constitution and our man-made laws, see Chapter 1, “Taking the Oath of Office.”

[6] “CAIR Launches 2020 ‘Muslims Vote’ Campaign with Release of Candidate Questionnaire, Calendar of Election Dates,” CAIR, January 21, 2020, https://www.cair.com/press_releases/cair-launches-2020-muslims-vote-campaign-with-release-of-candidate-questionnaire-calendar-of-election-dates/.

[7] “Sample Questions for Candidates and Public Officials,” CAIR, 2020, https://d3n8a8pro7vhmx.cloudfront.net/cairhq/pages/1125/attachments/original/1579621884/2020_Sample_Questions.pdf?1579621884.

#Legal #Islam #Sharia #Muslim #Jihad #News #Politics #Immigration #Elections #Congress #Religion #Media

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appleaxolotl · 4 years

Text

Meta Knight x Reader- Thunderstorms and Apple Pies

“Poyo!” “I don’t know Kirby, Dedede is always up to no good,” Tiff responded. “Well I don’t know, maybe he really has changed,” Tuff said. You heard the group of kids chatting at your table. Tiff, Tuff, and Kirby were holding up in your house currently. You had heard furious knocking on the door shortly after the rumble of thunder sounded overhead, followed by a summer downpour on your roof. When you opened the door you found the three of them soaked to the bone. After you ushered them in, they told you they had come from the nearby Whispy Woods but got held up in the sudden rain. The bag of apples they brought with them confirmed this. “(Y/n)! Poyo!” Kirby interjected. The group looked over at you. “You all know how I feel about Dedede,” you spoke, slicing the apple on your chopping board with a bit more force than was necessary. “Anyone who’s mean to Kirby is no friend of mine.” You chopped another apple, cutting out the core from the center. “Honestly I don’t understand how anyone could stand working for him. How does dad do it?” Tiff huffed. “Maybe it’s so he can try to keep the kingdom from going completely off the rails,” you suggest, tossing an apple core out the window, into the rain. “Isn’t that what Meta Knight does?” Tuff asked. You paused your chopping a moment, hearing the mention of Meta Knight.

“Well yeah, but he’s got his whole deal about bringing back the Star Warriors. We know he’s not loyal to Dedede,” Tiff said. “Poyo!” You glanced towards the table to see Kirby staring in your direction. You smiled. “No, it’s not ready yet, Kirby,” you chuckled. Kirby jumped down from his seat and walked over towards you, watching you place the apple slices into a bowl. His eyes looked longingly at them. “Kirby you have to be patient!” Tiff called. “It’s alright, Tiff,” you smiled. You bend down to be closer to Kirby’s level. “You wanna help me out so it’s ready faster?” Kirby’s eyes lit up, and with a happy “Poyo!” he started helping you make the apple dessert you were preparing. Tuff came to help a little later. You could tell Tiff was still thinking over what Dedede was planning next. By the time the dessert was done, the rain still hadn’t let up. When you were pulling the apple pie out of the oven, much to the delight of Kirby and Tuff, you heard a knock at the door. “Oh, who could that be? It’s been raining too long for someone to have gotten caught in the downpour,” you mumble, placing the pie down and taking your oven mitts off as you go to open the door. As the door opens you see a small knight standing out in the rain. Meta Knight’s cloak is wrapped tightly around him as he looks up at you. You feel a blush creep onto your face as he makes eye contact, and you quickly glance away. “Uh, hi Meta Knight, what, uh, what brings you here,” you stumble. God you can’t keep your composure around him. “Sir Ebrum sent me to find Tiff and Tuff.” “Ah, I see,” you nod quickly. For a moment you both just stand there. Your blush starts to creep back, until… BOOM! Another loud clap of thunder sounds. It rumbles deep in your chest. You make eye contact with Meta Knight’s mask. His metal mask. Wait. “Meta Knight, did you walk all the way here with a METAL mask on your face!?” You suddenly shout. Meta Knight stiffens, looking down. “Get inside, you dork!” You grab his hand and pull him inside, shutting the door with the other hand. After you close the door you stand still a moment, listening to the downpour on your roof. The rain hasn’t let up since it started. And a louder crash of thunder makes you jump. You feel a squeeze in your hand, and you look over to see you are still holding Meta Knight’s hand tightly. You quickly let go and glance away. “Sorry about that,” you quickly apologize. “It is alright,” he says. You can’t even make eye contact with him, your face is heated and your hands start to feel sweaty. You rub them on the apron you’re wearing to try to dry them off. When you glance up you see that Meta’s eyes are a pink color, rather than their normal yellow. You try to remember what that means, until you suddenly hear a yell from the kitchen. “Kirby no it’s still too hot to eat!” “Poyo!” “Kirby, no!” “Shit,” you curse, distracted from Meta Knight now as you run to the kitchen. A bit of commotion later and things have settled down. The children are still watching you as you start to cut the pie. Meta Knight walks in from the hall, drawing the attention of the kids. “Oh hey Meta Knight, want some pie?” Tuff asks. “Poyo!” You continue cutting the pie into eighths, not turning around to look at Meta Knight. You felt you had embarrassed yourself enough for one day. “What kind?” You heard him ask. “Apple!” “Sure,” he answered. You hadn’t expected him to want any. You grabbed another plate from your cabinet and started dishing out. Kirby, of course, was done with his before you had even served everyone. He held up his plate to you again. “No Kirby, no seconds until everyone gets some,” you smiled at him. “Poyo,” Kirby looked at you with the biggest puppy eyes you had ever seen. You leaned down and kissed his pink head. “Even with those puppy eyes, you still have to wait your turn.” You heard a chuckle and looked over to see Meta Knight watching you. His eyes were still a pink color. You felt heat rise to your cheeks as you turned back around to focus on serving. After all the kids had eaten, they went to another room while you started washing dishes. There always ended up being lots to wash from cooking alone, let alone having unexpected guests over. As you were washing, you felt someone behind you, and turned around to see Meta Knight. You stood still for a moment, unsure what to do. “Need some help?” He finally asked. “Oh! Right, yes, that would be nice,” you smiled. He grabbed a dish towel and stood beside you, drying off dishes as you handed them to him. For a little while there was comfortable silence. “Hey, sir Meta Knight,” you started. He hummed. “You haven’t touched your pie. It’s the only plate that hasn’t been touched. Are you not a fan of pie?” “No, I like pie,” he responded. “Oh, did it taste bad? You can tell me if it tasted bad. Baking recipes tend to be finicky, especially when you don’t blind bake the crust before adding-” “I’m sure the pie tastes wonderful,” he cut your rambling off. “Oh,” you blush at the compliment. “Thank you. But if that’s not the reason, what is?” He hesitates a moment before answering. “I don’t like eating in front of other people.” “Oh, cause of the mask?” He nods. “Oh, sorry, if I had known I probably just could have given you a tupperware and you could just save it for later. If you want to, that is. Or I could leave the room and you could have it then, or-” Meta Knight set the dish towel down and went to grab the plate he had left untouched. You went silent as he grabbed a bite and, lifting his mask up slightly, ate it. You turned your attention back to the dishes in the sink, feeling like you were staring. “You don’t have to look away, my mask is still covering my face.” “I know, I just,” you glanced back over to him, “I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” “You’ve been a very gracious host, (Y/n),” he took another bite. “And I trust you. You’ve proven yourself worthy of trust.” You blushed again, turning back towards the sink. “Thank you, Meta Knight.” A silence fell as Meta Knight ate his slice of pie. When he finished, he set the dirty plate in the sink and went back to your side to help with the dishes. “(Y/n)?” “Yeah Meta Knight?” “I do have one question for you.” “Go on?” “Why did you call me a dork earlier?” Your face heated up once again as you remembered you did, in fact, call Meta Knight a dork for wearing his metal helmet in the rain. “A metal helmet in a thunderstorm seemed like a bad idea,” you mumbled. “Yes, but why did you go to dork? Why not stupid?” “Because you’re not stupid, you’re,” You trailed off. “A dork?” You handed him the last dish as you turned to face him. Your own face was as red as the apples you had put in the pie. His eyes were a green color as he looked at you. That meant he was thinking, right? “I, uh, I guess in some ways you are kinda, well,” you trailed off. Meta Knight’s eyes lingered on you. “Listen, you look intimidating when people first meet you, like, you put on this whole air of being above it all, but, you’re actually really nice?” You met his eyes, which were shifting back to a pink color. “Like, you pretend to be working for Dedede but you never actually help him achieve his goal. And the way you treat Kirby is really sweet, like you’re kinda, I don’t know like a father to him? It’s cute- I mean,” you ramble on. Meta Knight’s eyes shift to a purple color. You definitely don’t remember what that means. “I guess, you’re just really sweet? I don’t know, I’m rambling, sorry.” “Don’t apologize, I appreciate you sharing with me,” he grabs your hand gently. Your face goes even more red, and you hear him chuckle. “Thank you, Meta Knight. You’re very kind.” You both stand there a moment. His hand is still in yours, but neither of you makes a move to remove it. The chorus of your clock interrupts your thoughts, and you glance at the time. “It’s getting late, the kids should probably be getting back home, huh?” You say. Meta Knight nods, and starts moving towards the door. His hand still doesn’t let go. So you move with him. “Hey, it’s getting late! You kids should probably be heading home!” You shout into the other room. Shortly after you hear footsteps running down the hall. Kirby and Tuff are the first ones into view, and Kirby sees you are still holding Meta Knight’s hand. “Poyo!” “Yeah we are holding hands, Kirby,” you smile at him. You glance over to see Meta Knight’s eyes are still a purple color. It’s hard to see but you swear you see a faint red color under his mask. Kirby holds up his hand to you. “Okay, you can hold my hand too,” you laugh. Tiff comes out to see you holding Kirby and Meta Knight’s hands. She doesn’t bat an eye at you holding Kirby’s hand, but she gives Meta Knight a long look. The red you think you see behind Meta Knight’s mask gets a little deeper, and you laugh. Before you leave, you make sure Meta Knight’s mask is covered by a layer of insulation, so as to hopefully prevent any lightning strikes hitting you all. And then you’re off. You drop Kirby off first, as his house was closest. Then the rest of you head for the castle. Meta Knight still hadn’t let go of your hand. You didn’t complain about it. With a quick drop off of Tiff and Tuff, you and Meta Knight were left alone together again. Out in the hall, looking out on the courtyard of the castle. Now that you were inside, Meta Knight had his mask uncovered, but it was still storming outside. “(Y/n), I do not want to force you, but perhaps it would be better if you stayed the night here?” “Like in the castle or with you specifically?” Meta Knight seemed flustered by that. “Uh, whichever you prefer,” he mumbled. It was uncharacteristic of him. When you looked at him his eyes green again. He was thinking about something. “Meta Knight, can I, uh, ask you something?” He snapped back to attention. “Of course, (Y/n), anything.” “Are you, uh” your cheeks flushed up again, “romantically interested in anyone?” His eyes flashed purple when you glanced up for a moment. “Yes,” he responded simply. “Could you, uh, tell me if…” You trailed off, your courage fading. Oh god what were you thinking? “Do you know what my eye colors mean, (Y/n)?” He asked. You look up, surprised. “Not- not all of them,” you give your honest reply. “Do you know what purple means?” “No I don’t.” “Give me your hand again,” he said. “Oh, uh, okay,” you held out your hand. He took it. “Purple means love, my dear,” he said, his eyes a brilliant purple color as he looked at you. And that’s when your legs gave out. Meta Knight, of course, being the smooth gentleman he is, caught you. “Oh my god, don’t scare me like that,” he laughed. “Well you’re one to talk! Do you know how much that anticipation was killing me? You dork,” you breathed. He laughs again, and you feel the rumble against you as he holds you against him. “Just so we’re clear, you do like me, right?” He asks, already knowing the answer. “Yes, yes, of course I like you!” You giggle, giving his helmet a kiss. “Just making sure, so I can feel alright doing this,” and with that he tilted his mask up just enough to give you a quick peck on the lips. Your face grew the reddest it could, and you covered it with your hands and you quietly screamed. “Oh my god warn me next time!” He chuckled. “You’re very cute, (Y/n).” “You’re one to talk. Let’s head back to your room so we can stop worrying about the rain for now.” And you did.

#Meta knight #meta knight x reader #kirby right back at ya #kirby #the meta knight crush continues #my writing #first time I've shared my writing here #but I have a lot of experience writing x readers on wattpad #which is where I posted this first

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galacticnova3 · 3 years

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sorry but what do you mean by good faith headcanoning? /gen (i agree w/ you and you don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, i’m just curious)

Oh I’m fine answering stuff like this! Helps me get my points across easier if people actually know what I’m talking about after all. Apologies in advance this got very long because I’m tired and can’t write short explanations when tired.

In a nutshell, it means not making some incredibly complicated headcanon that “explains” how x thing that clearly applies doesn’t actually apply. I just call it good faith headcanoning because it’s headcanon that doesn’t stem from much, if any canon basis, but that also isn’t used to excuse or push harmful or super unrealistic interpretations. An example of a good faith headcanon would be that Meta Knight is blind and his mask is what lets him see. There’s nothing that suggests or supports this in canon, and considering he still flies off even without his mask, it can be assumed it’s not actually required for vision. But saying that you headcanon he’s blind ultimately doesn’t do any harm, and just as importantly, doesn’t deny important established information.

As an example of a bad faith headcanon… Ok, this is gonna be silly, but I’m kinda brain’t right now. Say someone decided they don’t like the fact that Kirby loves strawberry shortcake for whatever reason, and said that they headcanon that Kirby LOATHES strawberry shortcake. In response to people pointing out that Kirby’s love of strawberry shortcake played a major roll in Squeak Squad, and has been depicted in other situations as well, they decide to say they headcanon that Kirby actually DOESN’T like it, but had to eat it for a challenge. Or they headcanon he was being “influenced” by something to make him want to eat the shortcake, as well as in every other instances of it being eaten.

The problem is that while this sort of thing technically DOES work as an explanation, it’s not a “fair” or reasonable one. No matter how much people point out that it contradicts something that’s been established, the person can always just point to their complicated workaround and say that “you can’t police my headcanons that’s mean!” In essence it’s basically the same issue teachers/professors have with you doing an opinion or argument-centric paper on something that can’t be disagreed with or argued against; at that point you’re not addressing the information, you’re just dodging the issue.

Yes, it’s true that people are allowed to headcanon what they want and that policing it(when it isn’t harmful/disgusting) is a shitty thing to do. I agree with that entirely. I’m also not against a bit of tip-toeing around in the vague parts of canon, and in fact that’s probably how the majority of my headcanons came about. However, in my opinion, there’s a point where it becomes a bit too much, where it’s really clear it’s all just an excuse to ignore important and well-established information about a character. Ignoring canon is fine until ignoring it fundamentally changes aspects of everything connected to it, in a way that no longer resembles the actual media.

The simple solution is to just call it an AU and then go from there, instead of making excuses for why X is like Z, when in the series X is shown to be like Y. In that case, so long as the impacts of changing that aspect are shown, and again, it’s not just an excuse to make abhorrent content, there’s no problem.

In reference to how this came about, the “bad faith” headcanons I was talking about would be the ones that basically say “Marx wasn’t actually a bad guy”, “Marx wasn’t being selfish”, “What Marx did wasn’t manipulative”, etc. as a means to justify Marx not experiencing consequences. Doing that essentially removes the basic core aspects of Marx’s character. Milky Way Wishes’ entire plot revolves around the simple fact that Marx is manipulative and a liar. He basically admits it himself when he says he got the sun and the moon to fight, got Kirby to summon Nova, and then brags about that whole thing going according to plan.

While it’s not out of the question to give him a motivation besides wanting to rule, like I did with Magolor in my headcanon, that motivation shouldn’t/can’t be used to undermine or otherwise excuse his actions. It doesn’t matter if he wanted to take over in order to improve Popstar or whatever(which he didn’t, because he gets excited about being able to cause all the mischief he wants, by the way). At the end of the day, he still probably caused major problems when the sun and moon started fighting, lied to and later attempted to kill Kirby(indirectly through exposure, then directly by fighting him), and ultimately got Nova destroyed. If the headcanon solely exists to say “but it’s ok and doesn’t matter anymore”, whether to woobify him into just a naughty widdle clown boy or (eugh) ship him with Someone, I can’t see a plausible way that it is in good faith and not just a tailored excuse to deny his wrongdoings in canon.

Now, this might seem like there’s an unfair line, because obviously not every unrealistic headcanon is in bad faith, but imo it can be figured out pretty simply. Generally, it can safely be assumed to be bad faith if multiple of the following things apply, within reason:

-It’s ignoring core information that, when changed, changes something completely in ways beyond just what’s being changed (ex. If you say Marx was actually possessed and that’s why he did MWW rather than being power hungry, there’s going to be more affected than just everyone going “oh it’s not his fault, ok” and then doing nothing)

-It’s changing so much information to make sense that, in justifying the one headcanon, many other things no longer line up or make sense, but go unaddressed (ex. Saying Meta Knight wasn’t bad in Revenge of Meta Knight because he wanted to take over Dreamland because there was actually some kind of great evil that he needed control to destroy, and that saying it’s because he wanted to end the lazy lifestyle was just a coverup to not cause mass panic)

-The headcanon attempts to justify an act that can’t be honestly justified or made ok in the canon circumstances (ex. Saying Sectonia actually wanted to rule Floralia and take over Popstar for good reasons that Kirby couldn’t see, like trying to unite them into a safer whole, or trying to justify Hyness’ mistreatment of Zan Partizanne by saying she’s actually the bad one)

-It is used in a manner that basically attempts to “victimize” the creator or “villainize” people who disagree if discrepancies in their headcanon are pointed out (ex. The creator “headcanons” Dedede is actually totally evil in order to write characters hating him, and acts like they’re being bullied when people correctly point out the positive relationships Dedede has with the main cast, as well as his role in aiding the side of good in games like Return to Dreamland, Triple Deluxe, and Star Allies.

-It is otherwise an unsupported, implausible headcanon being used to excuse gross and/or malicious content (ex. Headcanon excuses for shipping gross pairings, like MetaSusie or p*do/*nc*st ships)

While these criteria technically mean my shortcake example doesn’t count, I think there’s also always going to be a bit of case by case judgement with this sort of thing. Another important note, a bad faith headcanon isn’t necessarily bad conceptually; in most cases the issues can be solved by just making it an au with the appropriate changes, as that removes the issue of “how much canon can a headcanon ignore before it’s basically just an au?” As an example, “Au where Marx wasn’t a bad guy” is very different from “Marx wasn’t a bad guy”, while still allowing the same concept to be explored.

#asks #rambling #long post #hope this is readable #im out of it

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friendship-ended-with-pokespe · 4 years

Text

Kirby: The Great Bandits, Squeak Squad Appears! Chapter 10

“......Eh?” Examining the rail, Kirby noticed a sound of screaming and turned around. What met his eyes was the mine cart following right behind him at a ferocious speed! “......EEEEEEH!?” Kirby was horrified and made a run for it.

Rock faces are approaching tightly on both sides of the rail, where he cannot even jump to the side. He has no choice but to run forward. Kirby desperately rolls his ball and runs away. The mine cart continues to accelerate rapidly. It’s a frantic chase between Kirby balancing on a ball and the runaway mine cart! Waddle Dee learned out of the mine car and shouted. “Run, run, Kirby!” “I am running! Don’t come closer” “We can’t stop!” “I’ll gonna get hit!” “You can’t!” “Then don’t come any closeeeeeeeer!!!!!!”

Kirby is running at full throttle, but the mine cart continues to accelerate. It approached Kirby with an incredible force. The mine cart could touch Kirby’s back now. Even Kirby won’t make it in one piece if he is knocked away by the mine cart at a ferocious speed. “A-A-Ahhhh!!!!!!!!” The moment Kirby shrieked: The ground at his feet disappeared. “......Eh?” Kirby’s body floated in midair for a moment. “Huh......ah......wahhhh!” The mine cart broke on the way and came to a cliff. Kirby jumped out without realizing it. Kirby is head over heels. Of course, the mine cart was also thrown out in the air. As luck would have it, the cliff wasn’t very tall. Kirby’s body bounced three, four times and rolled on the ground. However, the mine cart which had had weight received more severe damage. It was dashed to the ground and smashed to atoms. Everyone on board was thrown out. “Wah-” “Owwwie!!!” A scream is heard. Kirby got up in haste and rushed over to everyone. “Are you alright!?” “Ow......that was gosh-awful!” King Dedede rose up while rubbing his back. After making sure that no one is injured, Kirby yelled. “What about the egg!?” “The egg isn’t here. It’s alright, since Lord Meta has it.” Answered Waddle Dee. King Dedede raised his eyes. “That douche, is he trying to run off with the egg!? So that’s why he made me board the mine cart and drove me away!” “N-No, that’s because Your Majesty got on the cart on your own......” “Be quiet, Waddle Dee! Are you talking back to me!?” “N-No, sire......” It was when Waddle Dee tried to explain himself while cringing. Something interrupted once again. Rocks began falling in pieces from above Kirby and the others. Some of them are quite large. It would leave more than a slight wound if it hits them. “What......? Is the ceiling starting to collapse......?” While brushing off the rocks with his hammer, King Dedede became stern and looked up at the ceiling. However, the ceiling is too tall to be seen. Up there is covered in darkness. Kirby was the one to notice something unusual. “L......Look at that!” Kirby jumped up and pointed at the wall of rock. Some strange sculpture adorned the wall. Large eyeballs with thick lips. In addition, it has ornaments on its forehead and ears. It had no body, only some enormous hands sticking out from the wall of rock. “Hmm......? Isn’t that just a sculpture?” “No! That eye just moved right now. That thing is alive!” Together with Kirby’s shout, the sculpture started moving and surfaced from the wall. It is a bizarre stone statue, with only its massive face and hands floating in the air. Its stone eyeballs glared and looked down at Kirby and his friends. The next moment, its huge hand swung down! “Look out!” Kirby and his friends quickly jumped out of the way. Waddle Dee rolled and bumped into a wall. Kirby looked up at the statue and yelled. “It’s the statue of a warlock that the mommy bird talked about. It was......Wham......Bam......what was it?” “My name is Wham Bam Gaia the Warlock......” A deep, deep voice came from beneath the ground. “Accept your punishment for disturbing my sleep......you invaders......!”

The stone statue lifted its hand a second time. It swings it down with a tremendous force. The ground shakes from the impact. “......You son of a duck......!” Shouted King Dedede in anger, and raised his hammer. It however is no match for Wham Bam Gaia’s power. Sent flying by its stone hand, the hammer broke. “Your Majesty!” Screamed Waddle Dee, and rushed over to King Dedede. Wham Bam Gaia’s eyes perceived Waddle Dee. Having realized that, Kirby yelled. “Stop it!” Kirby forgot himself and waved both his hands. Then, with a pop, a long narrow balloon appeared. The balloon puffed up and turned into the shape of a flower. “......Huh? Flower......?” Kirby was bewildered. A flower made of a balloon can’t possibly be a weapon. Wham Bam Gaia looked at Kirby and smirked. “I’ll have......plenty of time to deal with you later......this runt......for now......!” The stone hand swooped down on Waddle Dee. Sink or swim, Kirby threw the flower-shaped balloon at it. The balloon made a large explosion the moment it hit Wham Bam Gaia. “......Ah!?” It was an incredible impact. Kirby himself was also surprised and turned over. Wham Bam Gaia was stiffened for an instant. It’s solid hands cracked. Kirby gasped. He finally realized the power that ‘Circus’ ability has. “This sure is amazing!” Kirby was encouraged and shook his hands once more. He has the hang of it this time. He unleashes his balloon art skills. What came out was a puppy-shaped balloon. “Take that!” It was when Kirby tried to hurl the balloon at it. “What craftiness! You invader!” Wham Bam Gaia opened its stone hands faster than Kirby’s movement. Its enormous hand is about to smash Kirby!!! “Kirby!” Yelled Waddle Dee. At that moment, with a click, the stone hand stopped moving. The stone hand is covered in ice. “Uuh!?” Wham Bam Gaia’s face stiffened. Hopping down before Kirby’s eyes were- Meta Knight and Daroach. Daroach has a long cane in his hand. Twirling that cane and holding it under his arms, Daroach blurted out. “Even Doc’s invention has its use sometimes!” “Daroach! What was that right now......!?” “It was an ice laser. Not too shabby, right?” What froze the stone hand was an ice laser beam that gushed out from the tip of his cane. Kirby’s eyes sparkled. “Thanks, Daroach!” “Don’t let your guard down, Kirby.” Daroach stood ready with his cane once again. Handed the egg he was holding to Waddle Dee, Meta Knight had his sword at the ready. “Protect it well, Waddle Dee.” “Yesir!” Grabbing the large egg, Waddle Dee tried to carry the egg while staggering. Storo rushed up to him, took the egg, and took cover quickly alongside the walls. Spinni yelled. “Boss! No need to worry about the egg!” “We’ll protect it well!” “......Good.” With their weapon in hand, Daroach and Meta Knight both faced the stone statue. King Dedede, who had his hammer broken, got up at last and joined them. “My hammer, how dare you......! He won’t get away with this!” “King, don’t overdo yourself if you have no weapon. Stay back.” Said Meta Knight, but the king shook his head. “Shut up! Don’t make light of me, King Dedede! I have no need for weapons!” Kirby, Meta Knight, King Dedede, and Daroach. Before the four burning with the will to fight, the stone statue erupted in anger. “What insolence!” It squeezed its stone hand together with a bellowing. The ice that covered his hand broke. It opened its hand right away and swung it down on their head. The four nimbly jumped aside and dodged the attack. “That doesn’t work on me!” King Dedede kicked the ground and threw himself upon the stone hand. Meta Knight shouted. “King Dedede! Didn’t I say not to overdo yourself!?” The king tried to deliver a flying kick at the stone hand, but was caught in midair. The stone hand squeezes the king hard. With his face bright red, the king opened his mouth wide and bit into the stone hand. “Uoohhh!?” Groaned Wham Bam Gaia, but its fingers grabbing the king didn’t loosen up. The king will be crushed at this rate. Kirby tried to throw his balloon at it, but gave up on the idea. If the balloon explodes, even the king will get caught up on it. Daroach had his cane at the ready. Kirby shouts. “You can’t! You’ll end up freezing even Dedede if you use your ice laser!” “I won’t goof it up like that, you know.” Daroach shot his ice laser. Not at its hand, but its eyes. “Ergh!?” Wham Bam Gaia shut its eyes right away and loosened its hands. King Dedede fell to the ground. “Nuu......ughh......oohh......!” Wham Bam Gaia is in pain, covering his eyes with his hands. “We aren’t invaders. My apologies for disturbing you. I ask that you cool it down.” Said Meta Knight. “Silence!” Hollered Wham Bam Gaia, and raised his stone hand a second time. Kirby shouts. “You’re in for more beating if you don’t stop attacking!” “SILEEEEENCE!!!” The stone hand swings down indiscriminately. The stone walls crumbled, and stones of various sizes started to rain down. “Oh, come on! Well, let’s go!” This is the finishing blow~!” Kirby jumped up and threw the balloon without delay. With an explosion, its stone fingers shattered.

“Uhh......ugh......” As one would expect, even a stone statue would lose all its power. Meta Knight raised his sword high and shouted. “The temple will collapse if we keep fighting any further!” The stone statue sank into silence and stopped moving. It fell backwards and merged into the wall of stone. As Kirby and his friends watched, the statue reverted back into a sculpture adorning the stone wall. The serenity returned. “......That’s a relief.” It was when Kirby sighed in relief and murmured. “Kirby! Waddle Dee! Are you all right!?” A voice resonated clearly. Kirby looked over his head. The bright blue bird, Active Blade is taking a nosedive with her beak faced downwards. “Mommy bird!” Kirby and Waddle Dee shouted in one voice. “What was that ruckus just now!? Did you guys happen to wake Wham Bam Gaia......!?” “It’s okay! It’s over now!” “It’s over......?” “Uh-huh!” Kirby pointed to the sculpture adorning the stone wall. Active Blade gasped. “Kirby......are you telling me that you won against Wham Bam Gaia......?” “I did! Thanks for coming! We’ll be able to come out to the surface with this!” Kirby leaped and jumped on Active Blade’s back. “All of you too, hurry!” As Kirby beckoned, Meta Knight, Waddle Dee, and even every one of the Squeaks ran up to him. Active Blade’s expression changed. “Aren’t you people the gang of thieves!? Kirby, why are you with these goons......!?” “We can talk later! At any rate, let's get the heck out of here. I’ve had enough of the underground!” “......Sure thing.” Active Blade nodded, boarded everyone on her back, and beat her wings.

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Table of contents

#kirby novels #kirby of the stars #light novel #translation #kirby #waddle dee #king dedede #meta knight #squeak squad #daroach

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kalypsichor · 4 years

Text

five’s a crowd [ beatles x reader ] part five

chapter summary: It’s time for some apologies (aPAULogies!). You and Paul have a chat about student debt, Parliament, and showers. John tries to convince everyone that he won’t break the telly (again), Ringo tries to convince everyone that he’s NOT an old man, and you just wish George would drop that goddamn towel.

warnings: george is almost naked but not naked enough (sigh)

masterlist and parts one | two | three | four

these chapters are just getting longer, huh. also, queen makes a more... definitive appearance.

Paul’s chosen the corner booth. It’s the spot that you all usually cram into, obnoxious and loud and always on the verge of being kicked out. Sitting there all by himself with nothing but a cup of coffee, he looks very small and lonely and you feel a pang of guilt.

He glances up when you sit down next to him. “Back for round two?” Paul says, and despite this he still scoots over to give you more room.

“No.” Sighing, you resist your fight-or-flight instinct. You’ve always hated confrontation. “I just wanted to apologize. I probably overreacted today and I shouldn’t have, um… ”

“Ripped me a new one?”

You laugh. “Yeah. Sorry about that. I’ve just been so stressed about midterms and all that--which isn’t an excuse for being an asshole, I know. It’s been such a long day, with Ringo having to go to the hospital and John almost killing us in your car and George, uh… actually, George hasn’t done anything. But… forgive me?” You try your best puppy eyes, although that’s more of Paul’s forte.

He pretends to think about it, but he’s already got that smile on his face. It’s soft and accentuates the roundness of his cheeks and you can see what John fell in love with.

“Of course I do. I could never stay angry at you for too long.” You let out a sigh that you didn’t know you were holding. “And I’m sorry, as well. I hope some of your papers were salvageable? I’ll pay for your textbooks, really--”

“With the thousands of pounds of student debt you’ve got? No way.” You nudge Paul teasingly. “No, it wasn’t that bad. Besides, if I don’t have most of that stuff memorized by now I’ll be fucked for midterms.”

“It’s the damn Tories, I tell you!” A businessman at the table over shoots him a dirty look and you have to muffle your snort behind your hands. “Anyway, we’re not here to talk politics. How’s George?” At the last bit, Paul leans in, raising his eyebrows conspiratorially.

Just great, still want to snog him senseless. Nothing new. “Why don’t you ask George yourself, you live with him. He’s still pretty pissed about having to take cold showers in the morning.”

“Please, no more. I’ve gotten yelled at about it enough already.” He throws his hands up in mock surrender and you’re reminded uncannily of John. They really are two sides of the same coin… “Morning’s the only time I can shower, anyway. It’s not fun waking up early, you know, but I do have to get the studio time. I’ve got, like, a million art pieces to turn in next week. It’s killing me.”

Though he says this with a rueful grin, you can see there’s bags under his eyes. With all the drama going on, you hadn’t stopped to think about what Paul must be going through. You internally scold yourself not to be so wrapped in your own concerns next time.

“I didn’t realize.”

“Yeah, well. The woes of an art major. But when I asked about George, I wasn’t talking about our little row.”

You ignore that. “Showering every day is bad for your skin, y’know.”

“First off, that’s my phrase. Secondly, you’re changing the subject.”

“You’re the one changing the subject!” Don’t blush don’t blush don’t blush. “Look, can’t you try and compromise with him? Like, taking turns or something. You can have the first shower every other day and ditto for George!” You smack the table excitedly. “Damn, I’m a genius.”

Paul laughs and downs the rest of his coffee. “Alright, alright. I’ll talk to him about it.” Standing, he stretches and tosses the cup into the trash. “You think the flat is safe enough to go back?”

You mirror his actions, donning your fleece jacket. “Probably. I’ll protect you, though, don’t worry.”

“My hero!” He swoons and loops his arm through yours as you step out of the cafe. The rest of the walk back, he doesn’t mention George again and you think he’s forgotten all about it. That is, until you reach the apartment. Paul unlocks the door and gestures for you to go first. When you brush by him, he leans down to your ear and says it so casually you don’t even register the meaning at first.

“I’ll get the truth out of you one of these days, y’know.”

Paul winks and though he doesn’t say exactly what the ‘truth’ is, you think you have a pretty good idea what he’s talking about.

***

The next day, you’re sat at the kitchen table over a bowl of cereal and some salvaged papers, not unlike yesterday morning. John is once again swiping through his phone. Ringo’s there, too, having scrutinized the entire kitchen floor this time before sitting down.

“TikTok is a load of shit,” John announces, throwing his cell down.

“Yet that doesn’t stop you from being on it for hours on end.”

“It’s addicting! All that… hitting the woah and- and grenade stuff.”

“You mean renegade.”

You both shoot a surprised look at Ringo, who pouts. “What? I can be hip too.”

“Okay, the fact that you said ‘hip’ kinda contradicts that.”

Ringo sticks his tongue out at you and you snicker. John clears his throat, steering the conversation back to him. Attention whore.

“Aaaanyway. As I was saying. Our phones are all the government’s rubbish way of brainwashing us. And that’s why I propose… drum roll, please.”

Ringo obliges. You note that he keeps a rather good tempo.

“Game Night Part Two!”

He’s met with silence.

“Uh, let me think about it-- no.”

“What? Why not!”

You tap your finger to your chin. “Did you already forget getting piss-drunk and missing your American Lit quiz the next day? Or spilling Fanta all over my /nice/ white tee? Or doing that?” John’s gaze follows your gesture to the tv in the living room with a great crack down the middle.

“And you’re a sore loser,” Ringo adds. John frowns and throws a cornflake at him.

“George was definitely cheating-”

“Abupbupbup! I’m not done.” You point at his sour expression. “Don’t you remember the noise complaint we got from our neighbor?”

John actually pauses at this. “You mean Paul’s classmate? The one that does graphic design? Not that you’d know it from the way he dresses like a fashion major.”

“His name is Freddie.” Ringo supplies helpfully. Ringo was always good at names.

“Yeah, he actually knocked on our door and everything. That was embarrassing, John.”

A scoff makes its way through John’s pursed lips. “He’s got no right telling us to keep the noise down when his bloody flat houses an entire fucking band. I can hear them going at it until two am sometimes and I don’t call the police on them.”

“They’re quite good.” As if to accentuate his point, Ringo taps a familiar rhythm with his spoon. Must be from one of their latest songs.

John inhales and you can tell that this’ll turn into a scuffle if you don’t steer the conversation away soon.

“Anyway! We don’t want another repeat of last month’s shenanigans. I’d like to be able to keep watching Netflix on a functioning telly, thank you very much. You’re outnumbered, Johnny.”

“Well, actually.”

You both swivel to look at Ringo: you in horror and John with glee. The oldest boy is usually the tie breaker, the swing-state if you want to be American about it. If he throws his weight behind John, it’ll be over.

“I think it would be a good idea. For morale, you know. We’ve been at each other’s throats all of yesterday, and havin’ another Game Night might get everyone on good terms again.” Damn you, Ringo, you think, damn you and your altruism. John, in every sense of the saying, looks exactly like the cat that’s got the canary. He swings to you with the stupidly smug look on his face.

“The match goes to Lennon! Take that,” he gloats, and you fight the urge to strangle him across the table.

“When you fail Professor Ono’s midterms because you’re too hungover to tell Walt Whitman from Langston Hughes, don’t go crawling to me,” you hiss.

John makes to retort but he’s cut short by the sound of footsteps running down the hall. Your brain barely has time to conjure up the weird feeling of deja vu before George skids into the kitchen.

He’s wearing nothing but a towel. Again. But this time, he’s smiling, and the brilliance of it cuts through your sleep-addled brain and curls up somewhere below your rib cage.

“I just took a shower!”

“Good for you, mate,” John snarks, staring ruefully at the phone in the center of the table--did he change his phone case or something? It looks different, somehow. You can see his fingers twitching toward it.

George ignores him. “I just took a warm shower. A real shower with warm water.”

Yes, you can see that from the bit of steam still rising from his shoulders and his hair, which is now curling slightly in the colder temperature. There’s a droplet of water making its way from George’s very naked chest down to his very fit stomach--how he has abs, you have no idea, since the boy inhales food like Kirby--and you look away sharply before your gaze can wander any further.

“A warm water shower,” he repeats.

Ringo nods. “Ah, yes. The poison. The poison for Kuzco. The poison chosen specifically to kill Kuzco.” He pauses, looking you in the eye rather seriously, and you say the next bit together.

“Kuzco’s poison.”

The two of you double over, giggling like schoolgirls. George, however, looks confused.

“What are they on about?”

“Some American film.” John finally gives in and snatches up the phone laying on the table. Something flashes across his face. You know that look, and nothing good ever follows it. “Smile, Georgie.”

There’s the click of a photo being taken.

“Hey! What was that for?”

“Nothing.” John pushes his chair from the table and stands up rather abruptly. The look on his face is growing into something… wicked. “Nothing at all. I will be in Paul and I’s room. Doing nothing.” He surveys you all once more with that good-for-nothing grin, cradles the phone to his chest, and then sprints down the hall past an even more confused George. The door closes and locks with a decisive click.

The three of you look at each other questioningly. Ringo grunts something unintelligible and shovels more cornflakes into his mouth. George shrugs and turns to head back to the bathroom.

He’s already halfway down the hall before he freezes.

“Wait a minute. Was that my phone?”

#beatles fanfic #george harrison x reader #ringo starr x reader #paul mccartney x reader #john lennon x reader #the beatles x reader #mclennon #five's a crowd #kalwrites #crack

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thiswasinevitableid · 4 years

Text

Chemistry (Sternclay)

The last of the meet ugly requests. NSFW, because why not end with a bang?

# 33 you’re a nobody actor who comes in for a chemistry read for the part of my love interest but we end up arguing instead of reading [maybe I like that about you and demand for you to be hired or maybe I’m annoyed that you spoke to me like that so I say that I don’t want to work with you and they hire you anyway]

Stern is starting to feel self-conscious.

He’s been drooled over in every tabloid from here to Tokyo, gets fanmail by the boatload, and once did a photo shoot for Out that nearly broke their website.

But they’ve been doing chemistry reads for three days now and no one is clicking. True, up until now his action roles have never had a serious love interest. But is he so bad at flirting that he can’t even act appealing to someone?

He’s not the only frustrated one; Ned, the director, has chewed his nails down to stubs, Kirby has tweaked the test dialogue twice to try and help, and Mama, the producer, currently has her head down on the table.

“Alright Chicane, who’s next?” She groans as she sits up.

“Barclay Jones.”

Stern remembers his audition tape; for an actor with zero screen experience, he’s quite compelling on camera. Easy on the eyes, too.

Boyd ushers the other man in. He’s even taller in person, which Stern isn’t expecting. Having to look up during this scene will be novel.

“Lovely to make your acquaintance, dear boy.” Ned stands, shaking Barclay’s hand.

“Uh, same to you. Mr. Chicane. It’s a huge honor to even get here.” The baritone is soft, nerves obvious.

“Now now Barclay, flattery will only get you somewhere.” Ned winks, turns to the table, “this is Kirby, our head writer, and Madeline Cobb, one of the top producers at Amnesty Studios. And of course, you know Joseph Stern.”

Barclay looks at him and his brown eyes go wide, “Holy shit. Uh, sorry, yeah, I mean, everyone does. I had no idea I’d be reading with you. I’m a huge fan. Uh, everyone probably says that don’t they?” He shakes Stern’s hand. Lord almighty, even his hands are big and strong. Stern wants to wrap himself up in that voice too.

“A lot do, yes. But it’s always nice to meet a fan, and a fellow actor at that.”

Kirby gets Barclay his pages, allows him a few minutes to read over them as Ned briefs him on the scene.

“Now, your character and Agent X, that’s Joseph, have been working together to solve a string of mysterious disappearances in the southwest. The electricity between you two has been growing, and we’re only a scene away from you finally confessing your feelings for each other. I want to feel the tension in the air.”

They take their positions, Stern waiting for Ned’s cue to begin.

“You almost got us killed out there!”

“Whose idea was it to try breaking into the compound without an escape route?” Rather than moving towards him like the script indicates, Barclay leans back against the provided couch, arms crossed, forcing Stern to stammer as he tries to keep the momentum of the blocking going.

“If we’re playing that game, who got the car totaled in the first place?”

“I did because I was saving your ass, Lucky.” Barclay straightens up, but holds his ground.

“I never asked you too.”

“Excuse me for not wanting to lose my partner.”

Goddamnit, why isn’t he moving, it’s throwing Stern off.

“Uh, um..oh please, like you don’t see me as expendable too.”

A perfectly timed shift in facial expression, “I don’t.”

“I find that doubtful--is there a reason you’re not following the blocking?”

“Huh? Oh, uh,” Barclay tightens his hold on the script, turning to Ned, “I was reading through it, and it kinda feels like my character wants Agent X to come to him. Like, he knows Agent X kinda keeps things close to his chest, at least if your version is staying close to the books, so he wants to make him be the one to admit their shared feelings first. I thought, uh, kinda keeping me in one place and making him move would add to that balance.”

“It’s throwing the whole scene-”

“Into a new light!” Ned exclaims, “yes, I liked how that looked a great deal.”

“What? Ned, Agent X isn’t the kind to be, be, jerked around.”

“Not by most characters, but, like, think about it; when you’re really into someone but are trying to deny it, you’re often super-fucking open to them messing with you.”

“No offense, Barclay, but one of us has far more experience developing characters for the screen than the other.”

Fuck, that was uncalled for, even accounting for how exhausted and touchy he is. He should apologize.

“Look, pretty boy, just because I don’t have a handsome face and a fucking porn-star body doesn’t mean I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Do you think I’m coasting on my looks?”

Barclay holds up his hands, “you said it, not me.”

“Do I sense someone upset that all the hunky mountain parts passed him by because he can’t read his fucking blocking?”

“Gentlemen, please, that’s enough.” Ned waves Boyd over, “thank you so much for your time, Mr. Jones. We’ll be in touch in a few weeks.”

Barclay’s shoulders sag and he thanks them for the opportunity. Stern just thanks his lucky stars he’ll never have to see him again.

--------------------------

“You did what?!”

“I offered Barclay the part, and he accepted.”

“Lord almighty Ned, what did I do to get on your bad side?”

“Joseph” the director sets a hand on his shoulder, “I know how much this project means to you. So trust me when I say that, argument included, you and he had the best read out of all the other people we tried. If we want this movie to do well, we need him.”

“Fine. I’ll work with him. But I won’t like it.”

-----------------------------------------------------

He still doesn’t like it. But even he has to admit Barclay portrays Agent A exactly as he should be. He takes direction well, is popular with the crew, and looks aggravatingly perfect in his black suit that matches Stern’s own. If he doesn’t end up a star after this comes out, Stern will eat his right arm.

They have a lot in common, which Stern could enjoy more if they weren't constantly getting into arguments. He can’t remember what ninety percent of them are about, just that it feels necessary to have them.

They’ve been arguing a lot today, because they’re shooting the first kiss scene and it’s been fifteen takes with no success. Part of that is both of them want perfection in their craft. But the larger issue is…

“Joseph, kindly try to look like you actually want to be kissing him.” Ned massages his temples

“We all know why that’s difficult.” Stern mutters.

“We’re actors, pretty boy, our job is to pretend.” Barclay snaps back.

“And Barclay, please make it look as if you’ve already made the decision to kiss rather than punch your partner, rather than as though you’re still torn.”

After two more failed takes, Ned calls them done for the day. Stern is pacing in his apartment near the studio when his co-star knocks on the door.

“We need to work on that scene.”

“Work is over for the day, and I just got off a phone interview with Empire. So, no, no we don't.”

“Joseph” Barclay steps into the living room, shutting the door, “look, I know things are weird between us, but you can afford to not nail every aspect of this performance. I can’t.”

“Don’t be so sure; fame is tenuous even for the best of us.”

“Think of yourself pretty highly, pretty boy?”

“No! And stop taking everything I say as being about me. I...I don’t even think I’m that good. Not compared to some people out there. I can’t even get a fucking kiss right.” He cards his fingers through his hair.

“Neither can I. And I’ve had less practice. Uh, on camera, that is. I’m just so fucking nervous this’ll go wrong and I’ll blow my once chance at being in movies. So for both our sakes can we just fucking try to get this right?”

Stern holds his finger up, “One hour. Then I’m taking a bath and going to bed.”

Barclay sighs, the one he always makes when Stern reacts in a way other than what he hoped for, “Okay.”

They hit the midway point twice, working through some hiccups in tone, Barclay taking his suggestions and Stern following Barclays lead several times. Then they come to the kiss.

“Damn it” Stern pulls away, “that didn’t feel right either.”

“No shit.” Barclay steps out of his embrace, “it’s because you kiss like you’re scared of something.”

“My kissing is not the problem here.”

“What, you think it’s mine?”

“It’s like kissing tap water; flat and boring.”

“Take that back.” Barclay growls.

“Make me.”

Another growl, so feral Stern’s neck prickles, and then Barclay grabs him, kissing him like he’s trying to smother him, large hands cupping his face and tongue shoving between his lips. Not to be outdone, Stern grips the back of his neck with one hand and his auburn hair with the other, as if he could force them closer than they are.

“That brave enough for you, big guy?” He bites Barclay’s ear and gets a snarl in his own in return.

“Dunno, pretty boy, am I still boring you?” Barclay slams their lips together as Stern tries pulling him closer. What he manages to do instead is send himself backwards over the edge of the couch and onto the waiting cushions.

“Shit, Joseph, are you okayAhnngmph” He’s on his feet before Barclay finishes the question, lunging into another kiss, the pair shoving and spinning, and groping their way down the hall to the bedroom.

Barclay moans exactly the way he hoped when he bites his bare chest, shirt hitting the nearby chair along with Stern’s. Stern smirks up at him, savoring the sight of him panting and licking his lips, trails frantic kisses down his chest and belly, only stopping when his knees hit the floor. Barclay whimpers for the first time when he bites his hip, undoing his jeans as he sucks a hickey into it. He slips one hand into Barclay’s pants, drags it along his cock once, teasingly, before standing again.

“I’m sure you can manage the rest, big guy.” He strips off his pants and underwear, is down to his undershirt and socks when Barclay chuckles and grabs him from behind.

“Of course you wear fucking sock garters.” His beard tickles his neck, making him squirm in the hold.

“I, I hate it when they fall down.”

“I don’t mind a little falling.” He shoves Stern forward onto the bed, climbing on behind him and running his fingers up his ass.

“Fuck you look good like this, pretty boy.”

Barclay’s voice has never sounded like this; not a few moments ago, not on camera, not in Stern’s wildest fantasies. Stern is nothing if not versatile in bed, and right now he knows exactly what he wants.

“C-condoms, bedside drawer, please.” He wiggles his ass in anticipation at the sounds of sliding wood and crinkling foil.

Barclay pushes his legs apart, “trust me, you’re gonna need ‘em wider.”

“Someone confident about his siIIze! Fuck, oh my lord.” Stern buries his face in the nearest pillow.

“Like I said” Barclay snaps one of the garters, Stern yelping in response, “need you spread wide for me. Now what do you need, babe?” He snaps the other, slowly thrusting as he does.

“Need, need you to fuck me, Barclay please, need it so bad.”

“Want it hard, or something else?”

“As hard as you can.” He whines, rolling his hips in hopes of speeding things up.

“Okay.”

“FUCK! Fuckfuckfuckfuckingfuck.”

“You wanted hard, babe, so you’re getting it fucking hard.” Barclay growls as he rams into him, bed hitting the wall with enough force to chip to the paint. Stings ripple up his legs as the garters are snapped, his cock aches for attention, and he’s drooling onto the pillow.

In other words, he’s in heaven.

Barclay digs his nails into Stern’s hips, “fuck, shit, like to say I’m gonna fuck you like this all night, babe, but I’m close already. Comes with fucking the nicest hole in town.”

“Don’t, not yet, please, fuck-” tears of pleasure well up, his brain and body awash with ecstasy at Barclay’s words, “feels so good, want to come.”

Barclay pats his head, “don’t worry pretty boy, you will. Now be good and take me while I cum.”

“Yes, yesyes, BarclayAHhnn, fuck, fuck.” He whacks his hand into the bed as Barclay’s hips jerk violently, “please.”

A drawn-out grown as Barclay thrusts all the way in and stays there, fingers clenching and unclenching in Stern’s skin. Then one hand slides down, rubbing his cock as Barclay’s lips find his shoulders.

“That’s it, so good, so good for me Joseph, fuck, love feeling you all wet and hard ‘cause of me, most flattering thing in the whole goddamn world. Mmmmm” he purrs, nuzzles Stern’s throat even as the smaller man desperately ruts into his palm, “fuck you’re amazing.”

Stern cums with a weak cry, collapsing onto the bed, muscles no longer interested in supporting him. A comforting weight leaves the bed, water runs in the bathroom, and Stern fights the urge to call Barclay back.

It turns out he doesn’t have to.

“You with me, Joseph?” Barclay rolls him over, running a washcloth over his sweaty forehead and neck.

“Yes. I, um, I, what, are we, gah it’s so hard to get my words out after sex like that.”

“Flattering.” Barclay smiles gently, kissing his cheek, “I guess, uh, what, what did that all mean to you? Were we just blowing off steam?”

“I...I don’t think so. Or it doesn’t feel like it was only that. What do you want from me, Barclay?”

“To be your friend. Or more, if you’d let me. Gotta say, I think part of the reason we kept fucking up that scene is that we do like each other lie that, but got off to such a bad start we don’t wanna admit it.”

“That about sums it up. I’ve wanted to tell you I’m sorry for awhile now but, well, pride has always been my chief sin.”

“Not lust?” Barclay bumps their noses together.

“If what we did was sinful, I’ll sin any day of the week.”

“Hate to say it, but my reason was kinda similar. I, uh, I’m always the one to apologize in life, I’m always trying to make things okay even when I’m still hurt and I just couldn’t do it this time. I didn’t want you thinking I was a pushover.”

“Mission accomplished. Lord, what duo we are.” Stern laughs.

“Yeah. Do, uh, do you think we could try being a different kind of duo?”

“I would certainly like to try.” Stern kisses him tenderly, and the feeling of Barclay’s lips on his is so perfect, the way they fit in each other’s arms so snug that he wonders how he could have missed it for so many weeks.

They talk in bed for hours, until Stern;s stomach rumbles and Barclay insists on making dinner. They fall asleep in bed, kissing lazily and lovingly until Barclay’s head flops into Stern’s chest.

And in the morning, they nail their scene on the first take.

#agent stern/barclay #sternclay #meet ugly #movie star au #trans stern

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deafeninggardenerpanda · 3 years

Text

The first to react was Kine.

“Hey~! Water! It’s the sound of water!”

“Where’s the sound coming from?!”

Kirby and co. surveyed the area.

“The tree’s roots!” Kine shouted. “The water's coming out of the tree’s roots!”

From the roots of the Dreamstalk, in the lake, clean water gushed out. Not only the water, but the Dreamstalk itself was changing. The trunk and leaves were dull colors, but, in the blink of an eye, it became a bright green.

“Look!” Kirby yelled. “The Dreamstalk’s all better now!”

“Because Pirka’s heart has been cleared,” Coo said, “the spell’s effects have disappeared. Which means…”

Coo got cut off by a sudden voice.

“Huh? Where am I? Why am I here?...”

It was King Dedede.

Looking as if he had just woken up from sleep, he looked around. Meta Knight was also returning to normal.

“What happened? Why is water flowing out of the roots of-”

Meta Knight looked at the group one by one, and, in the end, stopped on Pirka. He seemed to have pieced together what had happened. He sighed, and picked up his treasured sword Galaxia again.

“It seems that King Dedede and I, possibly, were being controlled. Sorry.”

“What? I don’t remember anything about being controlled!!” King Dedede insisted.

“Don’t you remember?” Rick asked. “You sent me flying with your hammer!!”

“Wait, what?”

King Dedede shifted his focus. His sharp gaze caught Pirka.

“You did this, didn’t you!?!”

“Wait, Dedede!"

Kirby stood in front of the great king and spread his arms out to block him.

“It’s over already! Pirka’s our friend now!”

“What do you mean she’s our friend now!? What an insult to someone as great as myself!!”

“I told you it’s over!!”

“Out of my way, Kirby!!”

King Dedede, looking absolutely furious, swung his hammer. Kirby nimbly dodged.

“Hey, that’s it,” he said, “let’s play tag!”

“Whaat?!”

“King Dedede’s it! Everyone, run!”

Kirby started running. Rick, Gooey, and Pirka ran in different directions.

“Heyyy! This isn’t a game of taaag! I’m getting really mad right now!!”

King Dedede, absolutely furious, chased after Pirka. Pirka was fast, but she was no match for the king, who was making a serious effort. In the blink of an eye, he caught her.

“Get ready, you pesky pixie!”

He was about to squeeze her, but Kirby tackled him.

“That’s enough! Pirka’s it next!”

“Yeah, I know!”

“RUN AWAAAY!” Pirka screamed.

Kirby started running. Even King Dedede got caught up in the fun and ran.

“Why am I…?” he said. “I shouldn’t be playing stupid games like tag. I’m really mad right now, so-”

As he said that, when Pirka started drawing near, the great king picked up in speed.

“Who would get caught by a loser like you!? Not me!!”

“Waaaait!”

As Pirka chased after the king and Rick, before they knew it, a loud laugh filled the air. Before everyone ran around, the lake had been filling up with more and more water.

“Clean water~!” Kine said. “Listen, Coo, do you think this water’s fine to swim in?”

“Perhaps,” Coo said, “with the shadow cast over Pirka’s heart gone, the Dreamstalk has regained its original power. This water should be pure and unpolluted.”

“Is this the same water that Kirby sucked up~? Are Kirby’s stomach and the Dreamstalk connected? Umm… umm…?”

No matter much he thought about it, it was impossible to understand. Kirby’s stomach was full of mysteries. So, Kine stopped thinking about it and jumped into the lake. As he swiftly swam around, he called out:

“Feels great~! This lakewater is super clean!”

“It appears the situation has been resolved,” Meta Knight said, “I was far from able to help. I was holding everyone back…”

“No,” Coo said, “if you two hadn’t fallen under her control, we would’ve caught Pirka much sooner. If that had happened, Pirka wouldn’t have been able to have a change of heart. In the end, we were very lucky to have struggled.”

“...though I’m hesitant to admit it, that is correct.”

Meta Knight nodded his head, then raised his voice:

“Come, let’s return to land soon.”

Kirby and the others, who heard this, stopped playing tag and gathered.

“Pirka, let’s go together!” Kirby said to Pirka.

“Huh? No, I...”

Pirka shook her head.

“Don’t worry,” Rick said, “of course we’re not gonna spill all the details to everyone. We’ll just tell them that we worked together with you to solve the problem up here.”

“Thanks, but I’m going to return to the village I came from, not Dream Land.”

Pirka looked at everyone.

“I haven’t gone back since I was exiled, but I still want to see everyone there. I must apologize to the children I had controlled. I don’t know if I could ever accept forgiveness, but… this time, I will try to become their friend.”

Pirka’s eyes were brightly sparkling.

“Is that so?”

Kirby nodded his head.

“Well then, farewell, Pirka! But, since we’re your friends, remember to come visit us here in Dream Land sometimes!”

“Thanks. I am truly grateful, Kirby.”

Pirka tightly held Kirby’s hand.

“Goodbye, everyone!”

“Goodbye, Pirka. See you later!”

Pirka spread her transparent wings and took off over the lake.

“Now then,” Meta Knight said, “let us return to the small boat.”

“Okie dokie!”

“Back to the painfully cramped boat again, huh?” King Dedede said as they walked to the small boat. “Great… hmm?”

Noticing Gooey unsteadily walking beside him, Dedede groaned.

“Why are you coming with us? Gooey!”

“Huhhhh?”

Gooey looked at the king in surprise.

“Because I wanna go home.”

“Didn’t you fly your way here?! You can go back by yourself!”

“Nah. I’m tired after all that fighting.”

“There’s no room for you!”

“There is~!”

“If I say there isn’t, then there isn’t!”

...somehow or other, all seven of them boarded the small boat, getting jam-packed in.

The small boat landed on the shore of the Rainbow Islands. Everyone who had been eagerly waiting for the return of Kirby and the others gathered at once. Captain Vul and the Meta-Knights greet Meta Knight, the first to get down, with cheers of joy.

“Lord Meta Knight! You’re safe!”

“Indeed. The operation was a success,” Meta Knight plainly informed. The Rainbow Islands’ inhabitants, surrounding the small boat, resounded.

“Just as one would expect from Lord Meta Knight!” Captain Vul shouted excitedly. “With Lord Meta Knight’s power, the Rainbow Islands were saved! Everyone should be grateful!”

“No, Captain Vul. It wasn’t my power.”

Meta Knight didn’t seem to want to be thanked, but Captain Vul didn’t understand.

“Oh! Someone as heroic as Lord Meta Knight would never show off his own accomplishments! What modesty! Everyone should follow his example!”

“Aye!”

The Meta-Knights were in high spirits.

“I knew I could count on Lord Meta Knight!”

“I’m so sorry I couldn’t accompany you!”

“I wish I could’ve seen Lord Meta Knight’s efforts!”

“Please let us hear the whole story later!”

“...”

Meta Knight became more silent than usual. After King Dedede got down from the small boat, all the Waddle Dees simultaneously sprung up in celebration.

“Hurraaaay, hurraaay!”

“Hurray for His Majesty!”

Just like Meta Knight, the king had been under Pirka’s control. However, he held no shame about it.

“Of course,” he said, proudly puffing up his chest with pride, “prepare for a barbeque on the beach! Grill the meat and vegetables! Don’t forget the marshmallows! Set up my parasol and beach chair!”

“Yes, Great King!”

Bandana Waddle Dee handed the king his life preserver and sunglasses. The king was in the mood for a vacation.

“Let’s get this party started! A beach party, Dedede-style!” the great king shouted in high spirits, when, suddenly, the area became dark, and then raindrops started falling.

“Wow, rain!” the islanders shouted with joy.

“Hurray! It’s been forever since we’ve gotten rain here!”

Their faces lit up, as they merrily frolicked around in the rain. Kirby, Rick, Kine, Coo, and Gooey got down from the small boat. Pick dashed up to Rick and embraced him.

“Welcome home, Rick! You really did it! It’s raining again!”

“Thanks to your lucky charm!”

Mine, seeming happy, cuddled up to Kine.

“Kine, did you get hurt?”

“I’m A-OK! I did my best for you~!”

“I know. I knew that if anyone could make it rain again, it’d be you!”

Pick and Mine, along with a large number of islanders, crowded around the group.

“Thanks, Kirby,” Pick said, “you saved the Rainbow Islands.”

“Gooey saved your island. We just helped him!” Kirby said. As he did, the islanders started clapping loudly.

“Thanks, Gooey!” they shouted.

Gooey, who was not very good at being all sunny and radiant, waved his tongue shyly. The rain steadily evolved into a downpour, dampening the dry ground. The once dried-up lakes and rivers filled up with water again. The fish jumped in with great energy. Of course, the only one on the joyous island who had become sulky at this sight was King Dedede.

“Ughhhhhhh…”

His plans of vacation had been ruined.

“Who had to make it rain!?” he yelled with a bitter-sounding voice.

“Um… you did, Your Majesty…”

“Wait, you’re right! Ughhhhhhh… I HATE THE RAAAAAAAIN!!”

The violent sound of rain drowned out the king’s laments.

The rain continued for the whole day, moistening the dried-up Rainbow Islands.

The next morning…

As the rain stopped, the morning sun shone down on the Rainbow Islands. Kirby and Bandana Waddle Dee, who had woken up early, walked to the sandy beach.

“I knew you could do it, Kirby,” Bandana Waddle Dee yelled, “the withered flowers are all better now!”

“We all worked together to get the job done!”

“I wish I could’ve gone with you too…”

“You could’ve gone with us if Meta Knight’s small boat was just a bit bigger.”

Kirby and Bandana Waddle Dee agilely jumped over a puddle of water.

“Tell me about what kind of adventure it was! What was above the clouds?”

At Bandana Dee’s question, Kirby sweetly smiled.

“It’s a secret!” he said.

“Huh? Why?”

“No matter what!”

“Oh, tell me, Kirby!”

“Nuh-uh!”

It was a secret that he couldn’t even tell a close friend like Bandana Dee. Bandana Dee seemed disappointed, but then, suddenly, he noticed something and yelled:

“Kirby, look! The Rainbow Bridge!”

From island to island, pretty Rainbow Bridges connected. Due to the lack of rain, the bridges had begun to fade away into nothing. Thanks to the rain returning after so long, the seven bright colors sparkled.

“Woah…”

“How nice!”

As the light of the morning sun intensified, the Rainbow Bridges’ colors grew prettier and prettier. As they basked in the refreshing breeze, the two would forever admire the Rainbow Bridges.

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