#after years of resentment and hurt

[monoukotori]

I think the fandom greatly overestimates the amount of fraternal love Saga and Kanon had for each other before everything went to shit.

Lets forget that Saga literally left Kanon to die in Cape Sounion and never bothered to check if he was really dead

#is saga kanon's most important person? idk maybe #is kanon saga's most important person? no way #Aioros was clearly the favorite #their meeting in the hades arc was them finally reconciliating #after years of resentment and hurt #they love each other #but their relationship was fractured waaay before the series began #saint seiya #sts #gemini kanon #gemini saga #Also saga would be kanon's most important people #only because he had no friends or other support system before Athena adopted him like a stray dog

[kvetchinglyneurotic]

watched muppet treasure island to emotionally recover from the black sails finale but instead it also made me sad about muppet treasure island somehow

#black sails #muppet treasure island #something about mti silver's “pirates are family” thing and not wanting to hurt jim bc he likes him #after black sails silver ended the war to save madi (and flint if you believe the savannah story) but she justifiably resents him for it #picturing tim curry john silver standing across from muppet flint going “i will stand here for a day. a month. a year” #however the idea that both flint and silver were casually hooking up with ben gunn in the background of season 4 is very funny #kvetch oc

[thebirdandhersong]

i personally think there was no need to make remarks about age

#i dont need to feel any more ashamed about this when i shouldn't feel ashamed about this in the first place #because three years is not a HUGE difference. it IS an age gap but it isn't a GIGANTIC red flag-waving age gap. #but i guess for a guy it is if the girl is older #but anyway man it was comment after comment line after line and i felt like i was standing in front of a firing squad #not gonna lie my whole chest literally hurts when i think about it too deeply! #i have literally never been told before that i'm not an option because i'm too old #i also personally (and this is a bit bitter of me to say so maybe) i resent the fact that he did take the time to tell me that he was not #personally attracted to me. and then add at the end of the conversation that if i were younger he'd consider it #like. you literally told me you don't like me that way and aren't attracted to me that way #so the only reason you'd consider me as an option really is the fact that you know I'M interested in you ???? #anyway makes me want to throw up:) #the waiting room chapter

[clerichs-xi]

tender as a bruise, sharper than a razor wrap her tentacles around me like she'll never let me go

klaus' backstory arc just ended heho and it was revealed he used to be the lover of the goddess of storms and pirates... she had basically kidnapped him and imprisoned him into murder and piracy for 20 years and needless to say it greatly damaged him on every level <3 its okay he's been able to be normal for once since the start of the campaign thanks to the party aka his new found family

get urself a surrogate middle-aged father who can speedrun a forbidden romance in one minute and then immediately go to confront the darkest version/a corrupted version of himself, as well as his toxic lover as she tortures him -w-)b

details and just the lines hehe

#clerichs.png #my artwork #original character #original art #original illustration #digital art #digital painting #digital illustration #dnd character #oc #oc illustration #im so unnormal about him. #he got hurt soo badly in isolation... thats where all the scars in his ref came from </3 #this portrait is of the one scar his goddess did not give him.... </3 #tfw ur jealous sea goddess lover pits you against other pirates and sea monsters to fight for ur life and test ur devotion #and she promised to love you wholly only for u to realize she doesn't understand or know what love is #and only wanted it bc everyone else who had love seemed so happy and she wanted that too #so after she destroyed everything you loved (literally your entire world) she merely treats u as a possession for 20 years #and you don't know how to ask for love because you don't know how to love either so you resent her and everything and everyone #leading rage to build up within you and you willfully slaughtering so many things because you cant handle your emotions and pain #and after deflating and sinking into apathy a rogue priest manages to break ur exterior and touch you deeply enough to let you love again #and because of him you're able to begin breaking free of everything and you lose everything again but this time #this time you wake up in a crate of fish to outstretched hands and people who love you as family even after learning who you are/were #filling you with strength and willpower even as your goddess lover comes back swearing she loved you and loves you still #and she tortures you and threatens to take everything away again if you don't come back to her but because of your love for everyone #and their love for you youre able to hold fast long enough for them to break you out #his goddess made a copy of him by warping the body and soul of a naive young man in an attempt to replace him and fill the hole in her hear #he had to literally kill the darkest version of himself that hurt everyone and he laid him to rest... catharsis if ive ever seen it #as i said. im so normal about him <3 the guy i project onto the most ever #klaus lierstark

[dayurno]

No but for real do you think Jean blamed Kevin for leaving him at the Nest?

(being held at gunpoint) ok ok ok ok ill answer officer please

i dont think jean necessarily blames kevin for anything thats happened in the nest, but he's still just a person after all. in such a harsh environment and suddenly alone after hanging so much of his sanity on kevin and their friendship, of course jean resents him for leaving; he doesn't have the time nor the space to process the feeling of loss in any other meaningful way.

but! i think after he is no longer in such peril and can think clearly, jean learns to be angry at the world again. the realization that the anger towards the nest riko beat out of him was actually Rightful and Just like the sword of an angel will also bring the logical explanation that kevin was in no more control than he himself was, and that ultimately it was not his fault. i believe the pain of abandonment for jean comes from a much deeper place though, and that will be something that creates a rift between them even if jean doesn't blame kevin anymore; kevin, because he is too afraid of jean hating him to actually allow them to interact again, and jean, because kevin's avoidance of him makes him angry when he was prepared to absolve kevin of guilt in the first place

#this is such an obvious answer to me i think but like. Obviously in the haze of violence and adrenaline of the nest jean could only resent #he wasnt actually thinking on it in any other way than this person i love has left me and i am once again alone with a monster #and he is not to be blamed for this at all. id also be really angry #i just dont think this anger at kevin would last is all #because objectively its not kevins fault. and jean knows its not kevins fault. and wanting it to be wont make it so #cue the worlds worst breakdown seen to man #also i think kevin really would be soooo terrified of seeing jean again post canon #because hes so scared of jean hating him. and it might seem to other people that #hes scared of jeans anger because he thinks jean could hurt him. but its very pointedly not that #hes scared of jeans anger because he hates to see jean upset and he dreads to be the reason behind it #of course. the man who newly discovered that he is allowed to be angry at his conditions doesnt know that #but oh well you know theyll get through it. if it takes them years #theyre grown men after all #asks #kevjean #+1 dollar in the jean moreau as luo binghe jar but its the same thing as #how svsss binghe felt after the endless abyss when he saw sqq again kiking with other people #just this sense of explosive resentful jealousy

[dutybcrne]

Sometimes Diluc does wonder if the Delusion left a lasting impact on him, outside the never-fading scars on his arm. That if every time his temper flares or he deals a particularly cruel blow upon his opponent, it’s due to the Delusion’s lingering influence, that it may have altered him to be a crueler person as a result of his near half a decade-long dependence on it.

#hc; diluc #//Sometimes; he even goes as far as to wonder if the Delusion in fact only ENHANCED what was already there #//He’d damn near slain Kae out of anger as it was; anger he’d NEVER once thrown at Anyone before; much less HIM #//Who’s to say he didn’t already have that darkness within him; even considering the circumstances of that moment #//And him continuously—deliberately CHOOSING—using the Delusion only CEMENTED it deep into his self and soul #//He’s had plenty of his share of nightmares where he longs for the Delusion; regretting having Shattered it after its final use #//It was for the best; yes; but now he’ll forever be Haunted by the lack of it; like an addict in withdrawal #//There were times he DID try and cast it away during his years in Snezhnaya; but inevitably put it back on after harrowing nightmares #//He wishes he’d tried harder to get rid of it then; before it left such a lasting impression on him #//Even now; his body is still SO used to & wanting of it; he gets so RESTLESS #//Wanting to reach for and mess with it; only to find it gone and Remember why #//Or the marks it had branded him with start aching and acting up so bad; as though he were Burning from its fire #//Feeling utterly Exhilarated in the face of destruction his flames bring; in dreams or in reality then be Horrified at how much he’d done #//bc he SHOULDNT be proud of that; SHOULDNT delight in such cruel feelings and sights #//Especially when it comes to dealing w Fatui in Mond—the sick delight he feels in fighting/destroying them genuinely scares him at times #//He’s less inclined to feel it when dealing with the Abyss creatures—they aren’t HUMAN after all; but it still sets him at unease at times #//Sometimes particularly scathing remarks toward Kae during their bouts have even him balking #//Not quite rushing to take it back; esp not when Kae hits back harder or brushes it off w his irritating little posturing #//But still enough to make him mull it over afterwards & wonder just how much more resentment he holds for him #//And if he should watch out and make sure it doesn’t get so bad he tries to hurt him again #//He would NEVER willingly want to draw his sword on him ever again; not if he could help it #//no matter what’s become of their bond and how irreparable it must surely be; after all’s said and done #//But if the Delusion had truly sunk its cruel influence so deep into himself…who’s to say how well he can keep up this oath? #//Or smth idk lol

[a-lonely-dunedain]

6 for sweet Tossdir

6: Who will they take advice from, no matter what it is? Who won’t they take advice from, no matter what it is?

Tossdir respects Corunir a great deal, they both have that whole "Fierce Loyalty To The Point Of Self Destruction" thing in common, so just the fact that they're both of the same wavelength and Corunir is older and more experienced than him, Toss puts a lot of stock in anything he has to say. I think this is also true to a similar extent with him and Lothrandir. and Bregadir too of course, one of the few people who has an easy time talking him out of doing Reckless Things™

as for who he would NEVER take advice from... well, Duindil feels like almost too obvious of a choice, but it's true. He's still resents the things Duindil said about Meneldir after he came back. I know Duindil wasn't the only one saying such things, but Tossdir dislikes him specifically because he used to be one of Meneldir's best friends, and seeing him throw that friendship away like it was nothing and then having the audacity to call Meneldir faithless only solidified him as a total hypocrite in Tossdir's mind. So he would never listen to any advice from that guy, no matter how reasonable. he is nothing if not stubborn.

#now Tossdir doesn't see it this way but I get that Duindil probably has more complicated feelings about Meneldir than 'old friend BAD now' #I don't like to think of him as a one-note antagonist #his harsh words about Meneldir probably stemmed from a feeling of betrayal at the fact that Meneldir never gave him an explanation #and never told him why he left. I'd imagine that‚ after having years for it to fester‚ that hurt only grew into resentment #so I get WHY Duindil was so insufferable. but Tossdir does not #not fully and not yet‚ at least #also sorry for the late reply my D&D game started RIGHT after I got this ask lol #lotro oc #Tossdir #ask games #ty friend!

[gch1995]

Hi! Been thinking about Luke and Vader. How do you think Luke went from wanting to die to believing there was good in Vader? What caused that change/acceptance?

I have a lot of sympathy for Anakin/Darth Vader, and I don’t think it’s fair to place blame on just him for becoming such a deeply dysfunctional and horrifying human disaster as an adult, considering how deeply compromised his agency was his entire life under a series of abusive, hypocritical, and oppressive authority figures within a dystopian galaxy’s fucked up institutions. However, that doesn’t mean Luke wouldn’t have still had absolutely every right to hate his father for hurting him, his friends, and the many other people throughout the galaxy either.

Yet, ultimately Luke didn’t hate his father, even after Darth Vader reached out to him through the force by torturing his son’s friends, stalking him, abducting him, terrorizing him, threatening him, and cutting off his hand to try to coerce him to join the dark side in Empire Strikes Back.

Why?

I think the most obvious reason is that, with a little space and time to recover from the trauma that his father put him through in his efforts to find him and recruit him to the dark side, Luke ultimately sensed the good within Anakin beneath the darkness after he revealed that he was doing all this because Luke was his son, his family, who wanted freedom from Sidious and someone better to bond with than that sadistic asshole his current master was.

Also, in spite of how awful and dangerous it was for Anakin to terrorize Luke, cut off his hand, and threaten him like that on Bespin to try to recruit him to the dark side, he intentionally goes out of his way to avoid outright killing his son by going easy on him battle, giving him chances to escape, and trying to recruit him to the dark side to bond with his son and gain freedom, rather than bringing him to the Emperor.

Yes, he’s being awful, cowardly, and selfish in his methods, but Anakin is also trying to more easily avoid the possibility of one of them getting killed by Palpatine or one another by going after his son to try to recruit him to the dark side to overthrow the Emperor because he knows his master will do worse to Luke and/or himself if he finds out the truth about his son still being alive and a Jedi.

In Empire Strikes Back, Anakin also tells Luke “Don’t make me destroy you” when his son skitters away from him in terror. Though he went about looking for Luke pretty obsessively to try to recruit him for the dark side, once his son actually refuses to be swayed to the dark side by his father on Bespin after being abducted, terrorized, and amputated by him, Anakin notably doesn’t keep hunting down Luke to try to recruit him to the dark side or personally kill him for refusing after he runs away in terror in the movie. He’s upset about it, sure, but he really never wanted for Luke to be killed or hurt long term either.

Then, you also have to examine the fact that Luke didn’t really ever view Owen and Beru Lars as his parents. Though they loved Luke, and he loved them, Owen and Beru still never encouraged Luke to view them as his parents either. They were Aunt Beru and Uncle Owen to Luke, but never mom and dad to him. Luke really wanted someone to be able to identify as his parents. Anakin, flawed as he was, was the first person in Luke’s life to identify themselves as one his parents he had been missing his whole life, which is also why he was particularly desperate to bond with his father and inspire him to turn back to the light side.

If you guys want to chime in, you can!

@abla-soso

@fanfic-lover-girl

@fanfictasia

@komikbookgeek

@yoghurtconsumer

#fanfic-lover-girl #star wars asks #when and why did Luke go from fearing his father to believing in his goodness deep down? #I think it was a couple months to a year after Vader encountered him in empire strikes back. #because Luke realized that for as horrifying as Vader had been he still went out of his way to avoid killing him because he was his son #also for as much as luke loved beru and owen lars for raising him well he never identified with them as mom and dad #and for as much as Owen and beru loved Luke they never raised him as their son. they raised him as their nephew. #i love the horrifying and beautifully tragic father/son relationship between Luke and Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader #even if they sadly did only get like a few days together to really know each other and most of that time they were enemies #Anakin may have been far more dangerous and terrifying to luke than aunt beru and uncle Owen but he still identified himself as Luke’s DAD #I like to imagine Anakin and obi wan spent a lot of time apologizing and talking to Luke and Leia to try to bond and tell them their story #I really think that Luke would feel a lot of conflicting emotions after hearing his dad’s story #on the one hand I think he would feel a lot of sympathy for his biological parents #and feel some resentment towards the way the old Jedi order forbid attachments and operated like an extremist military cult #it’s why I loved it when Luke dragged the old Jedi Order for being hypocritical and self-righteous dicks who helped create Darth Vader #even if unintentionally #but Luke is also a good person at heart too so I know he would be horrified to learn that his father committed mass murder and hurt his mom #even though I hate the sequels and don’t like to consider them canon I loved the scene where Luke dragged the old Jedi Order to Rey #I do think it would take him some time to process how terrible his predecessors from the Jedi Order had become and forgive his father though #do I think he would be able to forgive Anakin even after learning his whole story? absolutely because he has a forgiving heart #and he’d also learn that his father was also a lifelong victim with compromised agency who ultimately regretted doing those horrible things #but it would take him a bit of time and space #return of the jedi #luke skywalker #anakin skywalker #darth vader #ot star wars #pt star wars #empire strikes back

[kinnoth]

Ok but think about how fucking horrible Loki would have turned if Thor had managed to become king. Like, even when they were only princes together, there was basically nothing Loki couldn't get away with: bullying the patriciate, being a flagrant wizard, spending extravagant amounts of money on absolute tat. And then, he was only the third most powerful man in the empire. With Odin gone, and only Thor who could possibly curb him? Dear fucking god.

Bc when has thor ever showed an interest in curbing anything loki has ever wanted or done

#thor has to get married at some point but i really dont envy the poor woman he eventually shackles to the position of queen #like just openly blantantly he doesnt love her as much as he does loki; he doesnt listen to her as much as he does loki #the fights they would have had about thor disregarding her opinions and priorities in favour of Loki's #and loki just ......the bitterest and most resentful version of himself #hatred for the woman who is in the spot that he -- by all rights and practicality -- occupies #to be fair i think Loki would have stuck around a couple of years after Thor became king and then fuckin bailed to vanaheim #he's too proud to stick around watching himsef and Thor getting further and further from one another #it would hurt too much to watch thor getting swallowed alive by the layers & layers of responsibility til he couldn't recognise him anymore #until thor couldn't recognise himself anymore or see Loki for who he was #anyway fun thoughts #internal thor tag #the woman who agrees to marry thor? definitely not sif. #sif is way too aware of the psychosexual codependent fucking trash mess that is thor and loki's relationship #she grew up around it and was in the middle of it throughout most of her young adulthood #she has too much self respect to subject herself to a lifetime of that #she's already long gone and far away by the time the subject of thor's marriage comes up #if she's married it's been to a nice man who loves her more than she loves him #if she isn't its bc she's not sure if she really wants to be married #she's having a pretty good time being a free agent now that her brother baldr has grown up and inherited their father's house

[angelastrology]

.

#im shocked beyond words that my ex messaged me today #ik its mercury retrograde and everything but of all people i didn't think she'd reach out after i stopped replying a year and a half ago #we weren't on bad terms or anything and we continued casually keeping in contact platonically after the break up #but when i entered a new relationship i just thought it was best to keep a distance #we did have a very intense relationship and a terrible break up in the span of 3 years #like if you look up the definition of a toxic karmic relationship our picture should show up #and in the long text she messaged me now she basically apologizes for having hurt me #which she already had done back then but this was a more detailed apology somehow #im not sure how to feel about this but it sure is overwhelming #i met her when i was 16 and we heavily shaped each other's formative years #trauma bonded too #its just a lot #but i do think fondly of her and i no longer resent her for anything #i just genuinely hope she finds happiness and love in whatever form it might be #i think that's what i will tell her #she also said that i was probably the closest to unconditional love she will ever experience.. which im not sure how to feel about either #i'm happy that she thinks positively of me and i know i gave everything i had to offer in that relationship #but i genuinely want her to feel happy and loved again

[mayclair]

the whole max and mike’s lives being foils of each other’s is so insane to me bc its like. for mike max is a representation of everything that could have happened to him if his mom left his dad earlier on (and what can still happen when you look at the way things are between them) and for max mike is a representation of everything that she could have had growing up if her mom hadn’t decided to leave her dad as fast as she did

#there is no way they don’t resent each other for it just a little bit. no fucking way sorry #mike knows max grew up with a shittier home life but still wishes his mom had the guts to do the same her mom did and left his dad bc #at the end of the day there is a little bit of bitterness towards both his parents for not making their relationship work out specifically #towards his dad bc his mom is actually involved in his life and did try to pretend that everything was normal when it wasnt which directly #ties into his desperate attempts to make his relationship with el seem normal to both of them when its not bc theyve both never been normal #they dont even know what normal really IS which also ties in to his very deep fear that the two of them will end up like his parents and so #meday he’ll become his dad and he doesn’t know which one is more terrifying so instead he blocks it all out in True Mike Wheeler FashionTM #and just keeps wishing that his mom left his dad because maybe if there was a distance between them when he was growing up maybe things wou #ldve been different maybe he wouldnt be this much like his dad #max on the other hand LOVES her dad they had one of those relationships where he wasn’t neglectful but wasn’t a great parent either but she #still loves him for trying and while her mom did try she gave up after a while while her dad didn’t. that was the real dealbreaker for max #and while after all this time she keeps saying im going to run away to cali and im going to live with my dad. but its not just the need to #see someone who cared for her the most during her early years its also the childish hope that her mom will notice that shes missing anf #come looking for her and that maybe when her parents finally meet again they can reconcile and get back together bc that is really all shes #ever wanted in her life since she was a kid and she feels bad for it bc she knows that her mom and dad’s relationship was never supposed to #last but she still wishes and wishes which is why that little bit of bitterness against mike will never fall away no matter how irrational #it is bc its like. his parents dont love each other but are still together for their kids. why couldnt my parents do the same? was i not en #ough reason for them? and this ties into her breaking up with lucas over and over again bc shes seen her parents and how they never fought #for each other and shes afraid that somewhere along the line her relationship with lucas will turn out the exact same and hell leave her so #its better to just leave now before it gets serious then later when it will hurt too much but lucas keeps coming back for her which makes #her realize that maybe it doesnt have to be like that maybe they wont be like her parents #anyway this is incoherent as fuck but shane mandej voice IVE CONNECTED THE DOTS #mike wheeler #max mayfield #stranger things

[homosociallyyours]

Watched the final part of the VPR Reunion and wanna state my grossly unpopular opinion right out loud in the village square: I *do* feel bad for Raquel and I *don't* think Tommy Flip-flop has gotten nearly enough of the blame in this whole scenario.

And i kinda feel like in 10 years if anyone is bothering to look back on this, there will probably be a lot of "it was a different time, you can't blame anyone for being harsh on her" talk. I reject that shit right now.

#vpr #bravo posting #to be clear: I'm not talking about the reactions of the rest of the cast/friend group #they're allowed their anger and resentment and feelings #what i AM talking about is the response from bravo fans/fandom #i don't have it in me to breakdown posts based on who they're focusing on #but i feel like people have leaned hard into raquel bc she's easy to make fun of-- there's less parasociality #and so i think there's more uncomplicated hatred for her #but watching the reunion I've been struck again and again by how deeply under tom's control she is #and seeing her break down covering the timeline was a lie at the end-- after watching tom HARP on them only having fucked once #it felt so clear to me that he drilled into her that SHE was the one who would be hurt by admitting this #when the reality is that he was covering for himself #her having sex with him once was enough to make her a pariah #but for him-- there's a path back of you can paint your cheating as a single mistake that was the result of relationship struggles #but when you've fucked someone repeatedly while still sleeping with your gf of 9 years? yeah no. #this man is extremely manipulative and clearly preys on women he can coerce and control #and raquel was (is) weak. unstable. and in the middle of having her life change dramatically

[phoenixcatch7]

Hero of Hyrule... Chosen by The Sword That Seals the Darkness. You have shown unflinching bravery and skill in the face of darkness and adversity. And have proven yourself worthy of the Blessings of The Goddess Hylia. Whether skyward bound, adrift in time, or steeped in the glowing embers of twilight, the sacred blade is forever bound to the soul of the hero.

The more things change, eh?

#The difference between the relationship between the first Zelda and Link and the last so far always makes me sad #They went from the closest of friends (omg they were roommates) never seen apart #To distant and resentful people forced together by prophecy (the princess has escaped again) never seen apart #And it really hurts because even now Link still gives his loyalty with his whole heart #After tens of thousands of years #Something especially saddening is that Zelda is always the bloodline of Hylia while Link is the reincarnation #And those two things are not the same #legend of zelda #loz #breath of the wild #skyward sword #zelda #loz ss #botw #tloz

[soft-bugs]

!

#also update from one of my previous posts: #ive cut off a friend because i dont like how they treat me and our other friends and i have a lot of mixed emotions about it #like i dont hate them but i cant help but feel slight resentment after dealing with this for so long #i wish them nothing but the best but i just cant take it anymore im tired of being afraid to do or say literally anything #ive tried all that i can do and given all i can give to try to help them but nothings ever good enough i didnt ask to be a therapist #and im like devastated that its come to this it never used to be like this or at least ot was never this bad #it hurts so fucking much having to lose your friend of like 11-ish years for several reasons that have all just been building up #more and more over the course of like 3-6+ months #vent #bugs agere journal

[yngai]

ada was injected with umbrella's t-virus suppressant (AT1521) by john clemens (his dose, no less) prior to the arklay & raccoon city outbreak & thus escaped the city without much possibility of infection from the city's contaminated drinking water, & has since always kept up to date on any vaccinations against most major progenitor strains, & it makes it really ironic that her adoptive yet biological daughter carries a dormant chrysalid virus within her & that ada had to work through mei-li's lab-related trauma in order to ensure she adheres to a bi-weekly vaccine regiment to slowly kill off the c-virus before it eventually mutates her

#* file // : OOC — ( 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐀𝐃𝐄 . ) #there's a scene in shoplifters (2018) i need to gif specifically because of how it relates to ada trying to teach mei-li how to be loved #because in her two years of life prior to ada entering the quad tower she was shown very little #& i don't think she necessarily blames carla for it given the circumstances of mei-li's birth #though there is some bitter resentment not just for tatchi but leaving ada with another mess to clean up #(wish you were here carla - so you could clean up your mess) #a hurt child that has to be shown love that ada is (at first) unable to express genuinely #the unconditional love a child has for their mother does nothing for ada it kind of makes it worse #and she can't reciprocate it during those crucial first few years #it's only after the separation that she fully realizes she's come to care for mei-li as her own #* file // : 004 — ( 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍 . )

[telekinetic-issue]

You know what? I forgive you. You were insecure, immature, and petty. Did you know you ruined performing for me? Something that could have been a lifelong hobby is now tainted with the memory of how you treated me.

I forgive you anyway.

You ruined so many friendships in one fell swoop—hell, it took me a year and a half to rekindle one of them, and I know the rest are beyond reach.

I forgive you for that, too.

Did you actually know what you were doing? Were you aware of how long your actions would stick with me? Part of me thinks you were. Well, a lot of me, actually. And it burns hot and raw to see you succeeding and rubbing shoulders with professionals, knowing that you probably stabbed a lot of other backs to get there, too.

Still, I forgive you.

I don’t expect an apology, ever. My hurt feelings and, let’s be real, pride, think you’re too vengeful to do so, because it would just be so delicious to deny me that closure, wouldn’t it?

Whatever. I was always the bigger person despite how much I wanted to absolutely throttle you until you understood how hurtful you were. I never even told our director, you know that? I could have, but I didn’t.

So, even if you don’t deserve it, you’re forgiven.

#tele talks #irl bs I have held on to for too long #fat chance she’ll see this or care but I’ve been hurt and angry for too long #so I forgive you now finally after five years of resentment