#its just a lot

[petite-gloom]

thinking a lot recently about the inevitability of my blog being a constant wall of text whenever i answer questions and it just kind of sucks because that’s not why i remade my blog. do u think it would be really silly to have a separate blog for questions? like i could turn asks off here and have a redirecting link. maybe it would make things a little more manageable

#its just a lot #like a lot a lot #and ultimately i just wanna collect pretty pictures and text to find again later #but i also want to be able to answer questions people have #and reply to the nice lil messages people send without always worrying im spamming and making my blog completely unbrowsable #u know #delete later

[sarcastictissy]

Opened twt, saw doomposting, closed twt.

#the amount of doomposting about qsmp is crazyyyyy #its just A LOT #so glad ive distanced myself from twt #qsmp #quackity smp #qsmp admins #qsmp discourse #qsmp negativity

[devotion-disorder]

gawrsh a hyuck im really goin thru it rn i feel like im constantly on the verge of tears WAOH

#text #and i cry like 3 times a year so this is bad #I FEEL SO STUPID AHHAAHHRHRUEUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #LIKE THIS COULDNVED BEEN SO EASILY PREVENTED RSUAUAUUVHHJHHHHHHHHHHHH #my stress level rn is like those watermelons with 100 elastic bands around it #my stomachs also been hurting for 2 days straight #and i have a project and a test and an essay and #anyways i think euthanasia should be legal #sorry guys i try not to be negative on here but i may dip for a bit #its just a lot

[agardenandlibrary]

Finished Barrayar phew

#cara reads the vorkosigan saga #barrayar #vorkosigan saga #lois mcmaster bujold #its just a lot

[cloverbxnny]

Being a creator online sometimes sucks because I feel so inadequate because of all the pretty girls online. Then I remember that 90% are using filters, but I try the same ones and still don't look as good. It's honestly a little hard to resist the urge to use them when I feel like the creative space is a competition, but I dont want to feed into it and make someone else take my place in feeling like they aren't pretty.

#rant post #beauty filters #aesthetic #cute #cute aesthetic #e girl #gamer girl #small streamer #its just a lot

[winnysatang-updates]

16-09-23 - IG Story Update : bbbytoeyyy

#satang kittiphop #winny thanawin #winnysatang #satangwinny #slowly working my way through everything so i dont repeat much #its just a lot

[girlwithfish]

ugh moving is soo much work

#have to unload the uhaul tmrw NOT HAPPY #my back is killing me too #at least its just moving stuff #i was getting soo overwhelmed w just like clutter and nog knowing where to put stuff when i was packing shit up #it took us 2 hrs to pack and move eberything #and now all my shits gonna get dusty ans gross sitting in the garage for however long #at least i have my clothes n cds #its just a lot #and i wanna clean out the room in my parents house cuz its just shit i left behijd when i was 17-18 #Not rly cleaned out just stuff i dont need or have use for anymore #So its like even more clutter #so that i can put my actual stuff in my room ig idk #SO MUCH!!!! #Im just gonna throw shit in bags and donate it or maybe try to #sell some books or clothes that might be worth smth but likely not #i have a lott of ya and childrens books i dont need or want anymore #🫡 Things overwhelm nme #me #its why moving js my worst nightmare lol

[isawken]

thing that keeps me up at night #44

neanderthals existed from about 130,000 to 40,000 years ago

homo sapiens have existed for 3000,000 years

that's 90k years of potential intermingling

that's almost an entire third of our existence, another species running parallel to us. but what were the differences? how different were their faces? their language? i was reading something that said they had less sophisticated language capabilities than us. when we interacted with them, what was it like? were our languages similar enough to get by? or as foreign as english and sumerian? the first evidence of the written word we have is from 3400 BCE. as we all know, that doesn't mean that's the first time we wrote anything down. it's just the first time we wrote something down on a tablet that survived for 5k years. the same is true for other arts. we have cave paintings as old as 45k years. that doesn't mean that's the first art ever. just the first that lasted so long.

did homo sapiens and neanderthals ever fall in love?

did they ever sit in a cave together, painting bulls and elk on the walls? did they tell each other stories? could they?

did a homo sapien and a human ever hold hands? did a homo sapien ever see a neanderthal from across the river and feel their heart thump in their chest? did a neanderthal ever caress the face of a homo sapien? did they ever look in each other's eyes and smile?

did love exist back then like it does now? when was the first time one human looked at another and thought,

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and only you."

we'll never know! and it fucking kills me.

we can trace language and history and biology so far back, hundreds of thousands and millions and billions of years. we know what beings 65 millions years ago looked like. we can guess when the fucking universe started.

but we can't know when the first human loved another.

i know this is saccharine and cheesy and corny but it really does keep me up at night. the indefinable aspects that make up the core human experience. how inherently unknowable they are. how inextricable they are. we can never know how our ancestors loved. but, at the end of the day, i also know that doesn't really matter, because we love how we love now, and that's more than enough.

still.

wouldn't it be nice to know where it came from?

#kenposting #i get really emotional about prehistory i'm sorry #the knowledge that humans have been humans for so long #that the core of our species is care and community and kindness #the tantalizing idea that that care and love extended even to another species so close to our own #its just a lot

[angelastrology]

.

#im shocked beyond words that my ex messaged me today #ik its mercury retrograde and everything but of all people i didn't think she'd reach out after i stopped replying a year and a half ago #we weren't on bad terms or anything and we continued casually keeping in contact platonically after the break up #but when i entered a new relationship i just thought it was best to keep a distance #we did have a very intense relationship and a terrible break up in the span of 3 years #like if you look up the definition of a toxic karmic relationship our picture should show up #and in the long text she messaged me now she basically apologizes for having hurt me #which she already had done back then but this was a more detailed apology somehow #im not sure how to feel about this but it sure is overwhelming #i met her when i was 16 and we heavily shaped each other's formative years #trauma bonded too #its just a lot #but i do think fondly of her and i no longer resent her for anything #i just genuinely hope she finds happiness and love in whatever form it might be #i think that's what i will tell her #she also said that i was probably the closest to unconditional love she will ever experience.. which im not sure how to feel about either #i'm happy that she thinks positively of me and i know i gave everything i had to offer in that relationship #but i genuinely want her to feel happy and loved again

[smurphyse]

Little girl is having an xray today because her favorite thing to do is make me worry🙃🥺

#shes 15 #has cushings #dementia and arthritis #its just a lot #I'm not having a great time #smurphs babies

[babygirlbdubs]

it is 4am. i still have 2 articles to read, and 2 others to do a refresher skim over. i also need to do the outline for the paper so i can just sit down and write it tomorrow. it is due in 11 hours.

#spooky.thoughts #I DIDNT EVEN WAIT UNTIL THE VERY LAST MINUTE THIS TIME I SWEAR #ITS JUST A LOT #i want to SLEEP

[smute]

also irgendwie is der wurm drin, ne? gestern wollte ich waffeln machen--same resippy, same ingredience, same process wie immer--and it was a disaster. hab mir das ganze waffeleisen ruiniert. gestern nachmittag wäsche ohne waschmittel gewaschen. heute versucht zu kochen und alles brennt mir an. broke a glass and TWO BOWLS. ich bräuchte eigentlich sowieso schon ein abo für geschirr aber drei sachen am selben tag? das is selbst für meine verhältnisse viel. zum einkaufen los und portemonnaie vergessen. zum glück gemerkt bevor ich im laden war. abfluss in der dusche verstopft (wofür hab ich bitte nen buzzcut). heute morgen bei der wäsche das falsche programm eingestellt und wieder 3 stunden umsonst gewartet. und später is mir beim aufhängen noch ne UNTERHOSE vom balkon gefallen 💀

#its just a lot #&

[idkimoutofideas]

Worldbuilding for my next dnd campaign and I might’ve gone a little overboard...

#m speaks #dnd #i was really trying to keep it basic #but the issue is I need seven distinct civilizations #each with their own way of doing things #so even keeping it basic is a lot #and I can't cut back on how many there are #i mean i do thing i want to use this place as a basis for a novel or smth one day #so none of the worldbuilding it wasted #its just a lot #who let me think this was a good idea

[notlongerfunny]

Tragedy as a genre really be like: it didn't change things, but it mattered and how am I supposed to do anything but love it

#exu: calamity #god that story fuck me over but it really gives the Let me hear it one more time #it feels idk #what do we owe tragic heroes but to listen #to learn what they cannot or to feel what they did #its just a lot

[heyitsphoenixx]

realizing that no matter how i cut my hair i’ll still have this face and i’ll look like a girl. local nb boy has to accept the fact he is presented with every day of his life in the mirror

#i know i need hormones ive known for years #im just really dreading it for some reason #im in a state w informed consent and theres a planned parenthood v close by #idk why i dread it sm but yeah #i keep thinking irrationally like i can avoid dysphoria somehow #bc i Have avoided it all my life until recently a few years ago #its just a lot

[xx-poetry-witch-xx]

I'm, fine... :)

#i dont know how to talk to you about my shit without you feeling like its your fault #and i dont know when to even bring it up when you havemt caught a break in three weeks #but you keep giving me that weird sad pitty look like you know im going through a lot #but i know for a fact you dont know shit #because you cant even tell when im having a severe panic attack #much less some mild anxiety #im fine though #its just a lot #all of the fucking time #and i dont know what to fucking do anymore #because eventually somethings going to happen and im not going to be fronting #and i dont fucking control what she says or does