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#Zen Masters
dawnthequeen · 2 months
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BROKEN PROMISES
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title: broken promises
character: steven hyde x reader
warnings: profanity probably I didn't rlly pay attention, mentions of marijuana usage, talking down abt women smh.., jealousy, miscommunication, ZEN MASTERS MENTION
summary: after hyde's fight with your date and his almost admission, nothing had happened between you two. next thing you knew, it was veterans day and someone else had their eye on hyde.
disclaimer: i do not support danny masterson in any way, shape, or form. i just have an attachment to hyde </3 (this is exactly what I said last time I just wanna make sure yall know...)
word count: 2,094
part one
Nothing had happened between you and Hyde since that fight. Your relationship had reached a stalemate.
That didn’t stop you from questioning it.
Your dates had slowly dwindled down, though it wasn’t that you didn’t have options, guys old and new still asked you out, but you couldn’t bring yourself to go out with them.
You wanted Hyde.
Too much to ignore.
Much to your dismay though, someone else had begun pursuing Hyde, someone that you never really could’ve expected. Jackie.
After her and Kelso broke up again because of him hooking up with Eric’s sister Laurie, Hyde had given her lessons on “Zen”. The two’s friendship started to bloom, and Jackie quickly caught feelings.
You couldn’t blame her, and the more you thought about it, they made sense. Despite that, you didn’t like the idea of it. It wasn’t fair, and you knew that, but you just couldn’t help the bitter feelings in your chest when you watched the two.
It was Veterans day, which meant it was time for Red Foreman’s annual party. He was pretty passionate about the day, being a Veteran himself.
Everyone was down in the basement. You were sitting in the chair opposite of Hyde’s, watching as Jackie talked to him while he sat on the washer. “So Steven, isn’t Veteran’s day romantic?”
“Oh yeah, government pawns, and missing limbs. That’s amore.”
“I know, I know!” Jackie placed a hand over her heart. “It’s a day for people in love to have fun together!”
“Man, all this talk of fun makes me wanna have fun… Hey! Let’s throw stuff at other stuff!” Kelso gasped.
Eric perked up, getting off the couch. “Man, that's perfect! I got stuff!!”
“I’m in!”
The two boys went upstairs and you couldn’t fight back your snicker.
Jackie turned back to Hyde. “So, Steven, you wanna go to Mr Foreman’s barbeque with me?”
Before he could answer her, you decided you could not sit and watch this, so, you went upstairs to go throw stuff with Kelso and Eric.
..
You wore a simple (F/C) dress, with your classic jacket. You looked around the front yard, there were a multitude of people that Red and Kitty knew, and a few different people that your friend’s knew, but it was mostly the usual crowd. You knew that Donna’s Dad was having a party, but you liked the Foreman’s house. You’d still stop by though.
You noticed Jackie with a guy you didn’t recognize, and you decided to walk over.
“Everybody, this is Chip, Chip, this is everybody.” Jackie motioned around to the people in the area, that being you, Fez, Kelso, and Hyde.
“Hey everybody.” Chip nodded at you guys.
“Yo.” You nodded, glancing over at Hyde. He looked.. Grumpier than usual. You felt your insides twist, and a brief sense of dread.
Chip told Jackie he’d grab her a drink, then went off. You watched as Jackie walked over to Hyde and you sighed a little, walking over to Kelso and Fez.
Kelso had his arms crossed over his chest as he huffed. “Man, this isn’t fair! Why does some random dude get to bring Jackie to the party?!”
Fez grumbled. “She could do soooo much better.”
You let out a breath. “Right? But it’s just to make Hyde jealous, so chill.”
“That’s not cool though, man!” Kelso whined. “I thought Hyde liked you!! So what’s goin on?!”
“I did too.” You sighed, watching Jackie and Hyde’s exchange.
..
After a little bit you saw Jackie get up, leaving Hyde and Chip alone to talk. You weren’t sure how it went down, but when you passed by, you heard Chip speak.
“She’s a bitch.”
You paused, turning around. Using your context clues, you figured he was talking about Jackie, which pissed you off. You were almost ready to give him a piece of your mind when Hyde said, “Oh no..” And he hit him.
You squeaked, jumping back from the two. “Holy shit!”
Jackie ran over. “What happened?”
“Somethin– Bitch– He–” Hyde looked between Jackie and the very knocked out Chip.
Jackie looked between them before gasping. “He– He called me a bitch and you hit him!”
“...No.” Hyde stared at her, very obviously lying.
“I am the bitch! And you love me!” Jackie looked like she had actual stars in her eyes and you could feel your heart crack. Did he love her?
You needed to get out of there. Maybe a date, maybe something, anything–
“L/N!” Kelso huffed, nudging you.
You blinked. “Huh?”
You looked around, realizing it was night time and you were outside somewhere?
“Get your head in the game, man!”
You remembered now. After talking to Kitty, Hyde came outside and asked Jackie out. Kelso and Fez were upset, and you.. Were hurt. Somehow, some way, the two boys had managed to convince you to spy on Jackie and Hyde’s date. Did you have a momentary lapse of judgment? Probably. But there was no backing out now.
The three of you snuck through the trees, eventually arriving right behind Jackie’s car, where Jackie and Hyde were sitting at the front of it. Their backs were to you, and you couldn’t hear them.
“What are they saying?” Fez tilted his head.
“Don’t worry, I can read lips.” Kelso stared at the back of their heads. “Jackie’s saying.. Wow I really love this date, Hyde!” He put on a high pitched voice for Jackie. “And Hyde’s sayin.. Yeah, totally man, I agree.”
Fez gasped. “Really? They’re having that much fun?”
You put a hand over your mouth, trying to conceal your laughter so as to not get caught. “Kelso, I don’t think that’s what they’re saying–”
When you looked back up though, Jackie and Hyde were leaning in..
You felt your heart drop.
You could’ve thrown up on the spot as you quickly stood up.
“L/N!” Kelso whisper-shouted at you, but you couldn’t sit there. You’d seen all you needed to see.
What you didn’t see though was how when Hyde and Jackie parted from their kiss, neither of them were into it. They gave it a shot, but it didn’t work. In his head, Hyde knew why. He had you in the back of his mind. He had been trying to ignore it for months, playing it cool like he always did, but that wasn’t working. He didn’t like you any less than he did before.
As it turns out, it might’ve been too late.
..
You were going on a date. For the first time in months, you were thinking about a guy that wasn’t Hyde.. Or, well, trying to.
Loyal to your old routine, you were heading to the Foreman’s house to wait for your ride. Your outfit wasn’t much different than your usual ones, but you did look a little done up.
“Hey, L/N.” Donna nodded at you, a lazy smile on her face. Everyone looked pretty high.
They were passing around the blunt, Hyde being the last one who had it. “Wanna hit?” He raised a brow.
You shook your head. “Wish I could, but I’m only gonna be here for a sec. I have a date.” You hummed.
“Really?!” Jackie gasped, looking over. “You haven’t been out in months!”
“Yeah, thought you were giving up the whole meaningless date thing?” Eric tilted his head, looking over at you.
You shrugged, shoving your hands in your jacket pockets. “I was, but, I don’t know. Guess there’s not really a point.” You side eyed Hyde in a way that you thought was sneaky, but unbeknownst to you, he saw it.
Your glare made him sit up a little straighter. He’d seen you when you were mad, but it had never been directed toward him before. What’d he do to piss you off– And more importantly, what did that have to do with you going on a date again?
Kelso looked at you. “Oh heey– By the way, are you good, man? Yesterday after we were watching Jackie and Hyde you ran off and we didn’t see you after!!”
“I told him that you probably had to go to the bathroom.” Fez nodded, sinking into his chair.
You immediately went pale. “Ahah– Yeah, uhm. My bad. I didn’t feel well. But, wowie, jeez, look at the time I gotta go– Bye!!” You quickly called out, going right back out the way you came.
Hyde put his hand over his mouth, mumbling. “Shit..”
It made sense now. You saw him and Jackie, and based on what Kelso said, didn’t stick around long enough to hear how it ended.
What didn’t make sense was why you would care. Why would it matter if he kissed Jackie?
Unless…
Shit.
..
You had been gone for about two and a half hours. Everyone dispersed, and Hyde couldn’t help but be reminded about the night you spent together months prior. This time though, he planned on changing things.
He paced around outside, hoping that the guy you were out with would drop you off the same place he picked you up.
Lucky for him, he was right. A nicer car pulled up, and you got out, exchanging a few words with whoever was in the driver’s seat.
You were happy with the date. It wasn’t anything extravagant, and you didn’t really like the guy, but he was nice, and it was fun. You were planning on just walking home before you heard your name being called. And not your last name, which is what everyone called you. It was your first name. It sounded foreign from that voice.
You had turned around, tilting your head before your face dropped. You didn’t want to talk to Hyde. In the back of your head you knew you didn’t have any place being mad at him, but you were hurt.
You blew out a breath. You just had to act like you didn’t care. Easy. “What’s up?” You shoved your hands in your pockets, looking at him.
“Can we talk?” He walked up the driveway, standing in front of you.
You winced, talking being the exact opposite of what you wanted to do with Hyde. “I don’t know, I need to head home–”
“L/N.” He stepped a little closer. “I just wanna explain what happened between me and Jackie.”
You froze. Of course he knew.. After what Kelso said earlier, there was no way he didn’t know.
You blew out a breath. If you couldn’t play it off, you needed to try to fix things. “Listen, Hyde, you don’t need to explain yourself. It’s fine, you like Jackie, she likes you, and it’s cool.”
“L/N–” He ran a hand through his curls, taking off his shades.
You didn’t see him without his sunglasses very often, and it always caught you off guard when he’d take them off.
“I don’t like Jackie.”
You blinked, tilting your head. “What? But I saw you guys kiss on your date–”
“You didn’t stick around long enough. If you would’ve stayed, you would’ve seen that the kiss didn’t mean anything. There– there wasn’t anything there. No sparks, no feelings, it was just.. A kiss.”
You listened before furrowing your brows. “Okay, um, that’s, okay.. Why are you telling me this, Hyde?”
“Because I like you.”
You felt a heat creep up your neck all the way to your cheeks. “What?”
“I like you. I– I don’t know when it happened, but I know that a few months ago when you spent the night I realized it. And, it’s not a big deal, but it sorta seemed like you might.. I don’t know. If you don’t like me, it’s cool, but it was starting to feel like you do.”
You stared at him. He liked you. But what about your promise? What about the possibility of ruining your friendship? A messy breakup could start bad things in your friendship. But…
Could you ever forgive yourself if you didn’t at least give it a chance?
You looked down, your cheeks growing redder by the second. “I uh.. I like you too.”
Before you knew it you felt hands on your cheeks, tilting your head up. “Could I..”
You nodded, the motion being so small it was almost unnoticeable.
He closed the space between you. The kiss was gentle, sweet, a result of years of denied pining. Then, it turned deeper, more passionate, the tension between you finally bubbling over the edge.
It was everything you wanted, the perfect kiss for a perfect moment.
Maybe some promises were meant to be broken.
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tag list: @cantbecreative
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kissandships · 1 year
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amorhedera6 · 1 year
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maroon by taylor swift is just so burkhyde i’m sorry
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buddhismnow · 1 year
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The Grandmotherly Kindness of the Zen Masters, Diana St Ruth
The Grandmotherly Kindness of the Zen Masters, by Diana St Ruth http://wp.me/pFy3u-1x4
To our western ears, Zen can often sound austere, unkind, even brutal and cruel. We hear about the rejections at the monastery gate, the hardships, humiliations and rough treatment its adherents are sometimes subjected to, and maybe we’re inclined to think it’s all a bit much for grown up people. However, when things are taken out of context—historically, spiritually, and culturally—they can so…
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starmocha · 1 month
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Zayne: actually 🤓
Rafayel: breathe in, breathe out 😌
Xavier: just let it out, sweetie
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terracemuse · 1 year
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kaizenin21stcentury · 5 months
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Famous quote by Master Oogway from the movie Kung Fu Panda ☯️
Zen Buddhism at its finest 🪷
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“The Bohemian garden, is free motion machine embroidered using layers of hand dyed silk. :: Michelle Mischkulnig textile artist”
[h/t Leila L'Abate]
* * * *
"Zen is very simple. Dishwashing time, just wash dishes; sitting time, just sit; driving time, just drive; talking time, just talk. That's all. Not special. But that is very difficult. That is absolutes thinking. When you're doing something, just do it. No opposites. It's easy to talk about "When you're doing something, just do it," but action is very difficult. But don't hold. Thinking is OK. Checking is OK. Only holding is a problem. Don't hold. Feeling coming, going, OK. Don't hold. If your mind is not holding anything, it is clear like space. Clear like space means that sometimes clouds come, sometimes rain or lightning or airplane comes ... but the air is never broken. This space is never broken."
~ Zen Master Seung Sahn
[alive on all channels]
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ariannadi · 3 months
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They actually made Adaman a street dancer I am YELLING
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hersurvival · 13 days
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Normal Paranoia: What if someone can read my thoughts?
My Paranoia: What if my boyfriend hacked my tumblr?
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junkcubus · 1 year
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wisdom-and-such · 8 months
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Poem from the Recorded sayings of Chan master Joshu (Zhàozhōu Cōngshěn) 8th Century, Tang China.
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roach-works · 2 years
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hey roach, do you have any advice on starting new hobbies when you tend to get frustrated and give up easily? how do you fight with the part of your brain going "this looks like shit, it's pointless, you'll never be even decent at it, if anyone sees they'll laugh or ridicule you" - even when i'm doing things in private, for fun, with no one to judge me?
name the part of your brain that tells you that something dumb like Brent Screamblo and when it says 'why are you working so hard to make something that looks so bad? idiot.' you say 'fuck you, brent, you mean little bitch' and keep going out of spite.
cognitive behavior therapy doesn't necessarily fix all your problems-- ive seen some accounts that say it doesn't fix hardly anything-- but in my experience it's important to recognize and name when a part of you so anxious not to fail that you’re starting to talk yourself out of even trying. sometimes what keeps you going isn't going to be genuine joy or self-confidence or hope. it's just going to be spite and stubbornness. and that's okay!
a lot of the time you just don't have the option of liking yourself, or anything you're doing, or anything you make. i've struggled with depression, anxiety, and massively disabling ADHD all my life, i know how it goes. but i've found that a spiteful determination not to surrender to the world without a damn good fight is a very functional motivator when the self-love jar is scraped clean.
it sucks to be bad at things. it sucks to work hard and produce amateur crap. it's embarrassing and frustrating and makes you feel like shit. anyone saying 'it's okay to fail!' is skipping over the very crucial central issue that actually it isn't okay, it feels very bad to fail! especially if you have limited time and energy, it's agonizing to spend what little you have on a venture that doesn't yield good results!
but at least you can say you went down swinging. like, so you failed, so you sucked, so you lost this particular round. you made three inches of the most dogshit scarf in the world. it blows. you're mad. i get mad! but you can still say, 'next time i might last longer, brent' and limp off to have a good sulk and plan your next venture.
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bobbinalong · 2 years
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never really appreciated the fact that max is just as displaced in time as bart is. when he tries to teach bart how to be a normal 20th century boy, how to fit into a time he doesn't belong in, he's teaching from experience.
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terracemuse · 2 years
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