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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Surveys #417-419

Been slacking on posting these, so here’s like three surveys over the past few days divided up. I just don’t feel like posting them individually. Beware, it’s a long post, haha.

Do you believe that animals don’t have souls? I lean towards the idea that they, at least more complex species with actual sentience, do in some way. It's hard to imagine like, a fly having a soul, but it's a nice thought. You could NEVER convince me some don't, though, like my late dog Teddy, Sara's old chameleon Jem, and I could go on and on. Have you ever not been able to swallow pills? No, I've always been able to. If you HAD to change your first name, what would you change it to? Maybe like, Quinn. Something you don't hear a lot, for sure. Something more memorable. What are your thoughts on orange soda? Orange cream soda is BOMB. Man, been so long since I've had that stuff... Are you good with children and/or animals? Don't mean to brag, but people say I'm like a magician with animals. No matter what it is, I bond with it. Children, not so much. I'm awkward around them. Who in your life makes you smile the most? My cat, ha ha. If you were cremated, where would you want your ashes to be placed? Hm. Maybe high up in the mountains or in the Kalahari Desert. Do you plan on going to your high school’s reunion? No. I'm pretty sure I'd shatter from memories just entering the building. Would you want revenge on someone if they killed someone special to you? Or would you find it in your heart to forgive? "Forgive" my ass. They'd better get what's coming to them, even if I've gotta be the person to deliver it. Is there someone you are dying to see? More than I think anyone could possibly know. But it's probably better if I never do. Could you picture yourself getting married and having kids? Married, yes. Having kids, no. I could only picture that in one phase of my life, but like I called it: a phase. I should never be a mother, nor do I want to be one to begin with, so yeah, no kids for me. Do you like to take walks? If my legs were actually worth a shit, yes, I would, if it's in a nature-filled area. What are you listening to at this moment in time? "Thoughts & Prayers" by Motionless In White. Did you ever kiss someone with a tattoo? No. Could you say something good about the last person you kissed? She's very resilient. Why are you single? Because 1.) I'm a very unappealing example of an adult, 2.) I'm not exactly very attractive, and 3.) I'm basically a hermit, so I don't meet people. Do you get jealous if your boyfriend hugs another girl? Hypothetically, in almost any case, I wouldn't. My imaginary boyfriend can have female friends. But I'll admit if it was like, an ex-girlfriend or something and it was a seriously intense hug, I might. Is there something that happened in your past you hate talking about? Yes, but I mean, who doesn't. Have you ever been completely alone with a boy in his room? You make this sound so scandalous lmao. Yes, plenty of times. I dated a dude and briefly lived with him for three and a half years. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? No. Who was the last person that you cried in front of? I'm sure it was Mom. Is it hard for you to be “just friends” with the opposite sex? Nah. Do you remember every single person that you’ve kissed? Yeah. Do you believe that the world will actually end? Humanity, oh yeah. The planet itself, given the infinite nature of the universe, also yes. At SOME point, even if it's zillions of years down the line, Earth is gonna get fucked by something. Are you socially awkward? I am the literal avatar of "socially awkward." Would you rather watch a comedy movie or horror movie? Horror. Who is your favorite actor/actress? MARK IS A FUCKIN' ACTOR, Y'ALL. Are you satisfied with your gender? Yeah. Are you good at admitting your problems? HA! Yeah. ezpz Have you ever had a hangover? No, never been drunk to begin with. Do you know any strippers? No. How many times have you dyed your hair? I ain't counting. What is something that reminds you of your childhood? Dinosaurs. Do you think you eat healthy? I try to. I have my bad days, though. Are you sick quite often or hardly at all? My immune system is the fucking MVP. I am just about never, ever sick. Has anyone suspected you of being a different sexuality? Yes. Do you like chocolate or vanilla cake more? Chocolate, duh. Does it bother you to have blood drawn or not so much? Nah, no biggie. Has your cell phone ever rung in class? Omg no, I woulda been mortified. Have you ever tried opening your eyes under water? Yeah, as a kid. Would you rather have a cat or a dog? I prefer cats. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? Like... six times, I wanna say. What would you say is your favorite type of flower? Orchids, but I also love dahlias. I've actually noticed that I've really had a greater "thing" for flowers lately. Like don't get me wrong, I've always loved flowers very much, but I've just found myself more drawn to them than usual, especially when taking the daily hour ride to the TMS office. Do you watch Toddlers and Tiaras? FUCK no. That show disgusts and angers me so much. If someone asked you to go to war today, what would you say? Yeah, no. Funny joke. I couldn't go anyway due to mental health issues and a suicidal history. Do you own an old vintage typewriter? We used to when I was little. I have no idea what happened to it, though?? Hell, maybe we still have it somewhere, but I doubt that. Do you like or hate the smell of fish? Ew, does ANYONE like the smell of fish??? Have you ever read any of John Green’s books? I got a few pages into The Fault in Our Stars, but stopped for no real reason. I didn't not like it or anything, I was just still in my "I don't read" episode. Are you a protective person? VERY. I'm a fucking guard dog over those I love most. Are you a fan of penguins? Yeah, they're cute. I especially think emperor penguins are very majestic. Have you ever met your favorite author? I don’t have a favorite author. Did you get your mom or dad’s eyes? Neither's. I think my maternal grandpa had blue eyes, though? I'm not sure at all, though. When was the last time someone bought you flowers? Not sure. Has there ever been a murder in your town? "A" murder? Thems is rookie numbers for my neck of the woods, fella. This place is known for crime, and that includes murder. When falling asleep, do you ever feel like you stopped breathing? Well, I have seriously severe sleep apnea, so... but the diagnosis came as a surprise to me, because I never DID think this. But sure enough, did a sleep study, and in just one hour's time, I stopped breathing like what, 30 times? What's the last thing that scared the hell out of you? Stupid drivers. Do you have any life-changing plans within the next 6 months? I guess getting a job could be pretty life-changing. As of right now, how do you feel about your future? I'm very, very scared. Who is the last person you ran into unexpectedly? Hm, I dunno. Where does your grandma live? Both of mine are dead, but my paternal grandmother lived in Michigan, while my maternal one technically lived in Florida, but stayed in New York with her son's family a whole lot. I don't really know where she stayed more. Do you know how to read music? Not anymore. Does the song you’re currently listening to remind you of anyone special? Not so much the song, but the band. Motionless In White is one of his all-time favorites, so I can't listen to them without thinking of Jason. Sucks because they've been becoming one of MY favorites, too, so I listen to them a lot. If the person who has hurt you the most, said they were in love with you, would you believe them? I'd tell him he was in a love with a person who no longer exists. It's impossible for him to be in love with me now when he doesn't know how much I've changed. If Facebook made you pay would you still use it? Ha, no. Have you ever been recorded on film without your permission? Not that I know of? Tell me about your last boyfriend? He's a wonderful person. He's been there for me without fail since we became friends in high school band, and he is SO fucking funny. He's always cared a lot about me, and I care a lot about him, just not in the same way he does me. He's like my big brother. Are your parents racist? My dad definitely is. What is your least favorite subject in school? Math and economics both sucked. Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before? Almost certain no. I'm pretty sure Dad didn't fight for custody at all, but it could've been something Mom just never told me. Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I NEVER could. Do you have any siblings you neglect? .-. As a kid, did you ever go to camp? I went to Vacation Bible School, if that counts. Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls? Yeah, until that big news story about a dirty needle pricking a child. Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other? Not to my knowledge. I highly doubt it. What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there? Cheese quesadilla with fiesta potatoes. Rarely a pair of those cinnamon ball thingies. Ever consider a sex change? Nah. Do you eat whip cream straight out of the can? EW no. I hate the texture of whipped cream. What do you think of popcorn? Loooove. Have you ever dated any of your friends’ ex? No. Well, it's funny, Rachel (both Juan's and Jason's ex) and I are friends now, but definitely weren't at the time of us being together. Have you ever gone out with someone even though one of your friends liked that person first? If yes, did you feel bad? If no, were you tempted to? No. Would you rather be a rich musician, or a rich actor? Musician. What was the last charity you donated to? I don't recall. Did you like to collect frogspawn as a kid? I've told the "my friends and I saved hundreds of tadpoles" story enough times, so for this question, I'll just talk about when I would go fishing with Dad as a kid. Back then, if I got bored of actually fishing, I would walk along the riverbank and try to catch tadpoles and minnows in my hands. It was soooo fun to Kid Brittany. Do you walk fast or slow? I walk pretty damn slow. Can you juggle with more than two items? I can't juggle, period. Do you like jalapenos? Yeah! Do you like kiwis? Yessss, I love kiwi! Does anyone in your family go deer or bird hunting? Who is it anyway? I don't know if she still does, but my little sister used to go deer hunting with a friend.

Are you saving up for anything right now? What? Yeah, my pet snake's 40 gallon terrarium. What sort of things do you have bookmarked in your internet browser? It's quite diverse, but I think I mostly have templates for specific character profiles. Have you ever snuck in to a theater/dance/bar etc? No, I'm a good noodle. If given the chance, would you go to Ireland? Certainly! It's beautiful there. If you have a cat, does it ever “converse” with you? Oh, ABSOLUTELY. When I talk to him, he sure does try to answer me and it's the cutest thing, ha ha. Have you ever tried those electric toothbrushes? Yeah, that’s what I use. Has anyone told you that they wanted to marry you/were planning on it/etc? Yeah, guess he changed his mind. Name one of your ex’s mother’s names? Virginia. Does your favorite song have a meaning? BIG TIME. Have you ever written or received a suicide note? I've written one. .-. What is the worst thing a child has ever done to you while you were babysitting? When I was changing her diaper, she got up and ran around naked in the house. ;-; Do you own a nightgown? No. If you could get any pet right now, what would you get? i. want. my. tarantula. Have you ever actually been stuffed into a locker? No. That is just such a TV trope that I've never even heard of happening irl. Do you/did you decorate the inside of your locker at school with stuff? I only had a locker in middle school, and I believe I didn't. I didn't want one in HS. What’s the coolest thing you’ve made with Legos? I was never a Legos kid; I played with Lincoln Logs. Do you want to get pregnant right now? Fuck no, man. Or ever. Have you ever housed a friend for a long period of time because they had no place to live? No. If you have a favorite comedian, have they ever been in a movie? I don't have one, really. Are there any books you want to read? Besides the series I'm reading, I want to read The Testaments by Margaret Atwood, but idk if I'll ever get to it, really. If you have younger siblings, are you very protective of them? We don't have a close relationship, but I am nevertheless. If you have older siblings, are they very protective of you? Not really, it seems. First letter of the names of everyone you have kissed? J, T, D, S. Do you like going to school sports games? No, I hated it. When Ash was a cheerleader, Mom made me go, and I was never happy about it. Have you ever worn your boyfriend’s clothes? An ex-boyfriend's, yeah. Did you get into your mom’s makeup when you were a kid? I don't think I did? Do you want anything pierced? Ugh, a lot of places. The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner? I never do. Has your partner ever accused you of cheating when you actually didn’t? I've never been accused of cheating. Has anyone ever called you stuck-up? No. I'm quite the opposite. Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders? Too many, really. What are you doing this summer? Nada. Do you still watch MTV? I never did. Have you ever spent the night with the last person you kissed? Yes. What’s the dress code for your job? Do you like it? I'm unemployed. Does your job allow piercings or tattoos? ^, and this might sound stupid, but I wouldn't work at a job that didn't. Especially tattoos. No job is stopping me from doing things that improve my self-esteem and body image, particularly when I LOATHE my body. If a little bit of art makes me feel better about myself? Nobody is stopping me. What are some trends you dislike that everyone seems to love? "Crocs. Whyyyy?" <<<< THIS. First people hated them, now they love them??? They're hideous as shit. If you got married and then got divorced, would you want to re-marry? I don't really know. How often do you use lotion? Not NEARLY enough for someone with skin as dry as mine. Do you donate your old stuff to Goodwill? If so, what was the last thing you donated? Yeah. Mom recently brought some old toys, I think? How weight conscious are you? You have no fucking idea. Rent a movie or go see one in theaters? I prefer going to a theater. I enjoy the experience. What’s the biggest personality trait turn-off for a potential partner? Probably being an explosive/volatile person. I can't with that. Would you ever go on a birth control pill? I already am to regulate my period and tame the cramps. And if I was sexually active, I absolutely would want to be on it. What's your favorite late night tv show? I don’t have one. At high school do or did you participate in Spirit Week? No. Do you have a favorite vocalist? Who? Queen's Freddie Mercury will probably always top the list. If you have a favorite photographer, can you describe their work? I don't have a favorite photographer. Surprisingly. Are sex and sexual activities something you enjoy? If it's with someone I'm in love with and am in the mood, sure. What is one aspect of your life that did not turn out as you expected? I did NOT expect to reach 25 like... *gestures at self* this. What is one thing stopping you from becoming a veterinarian? I could never handle euthanizing pets and watching the families' hearts break. How long have you lived in the house you live in? Not even a year. Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? I'm definitely sadder. Especially today. Do you like Subway? I do. Have you ever seen a volcano? No. Have you ever found a spider on your bed? Yes. It's the scariest shit when one skitters across your blanket, because like, you LEAST expect it to happen in the comfort of your own bed. Are you satisfied with the way your life is right now? Not even remotely, if I'm being honest. I'm at a real low. When was the last time you ate at Burger King? Years ago, when I was a vegetarian and went there for the veggie burger. How often do you cry? lol a lot Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. Can you wire a plug? ... I don't even know what you mean by "wire a plug," so obviously no lmfao. Where were you when you got your first period? Well I think I actually *started* at school, but I noticed when I got home. Can you drive? I mean I'm capable, but I'm an incredibly anxious, overly passive, and just generally terrified driver. I'm so scared of when I finally get new glasses and therefore a new permit... but I have to get used to driving. Living where I do, public transportation is very, very limited, and I just can't have people driving me places the rest of my life. Exercise or healthy eating? I sadly hate exercising SO much. I'd rather eat healthy. Did you play Red Rover when you were a child? Yeah. Are you more attracted to men or women? This can actually vary with time, which I originally thought was weird but is apparently normal for some bisexual individuals. There are spans where I feel more sexual attraction to men, and then other times women. Has anyone ever called you rich? God no, I am so far from it. What makes you feel beautiful? Nothing. Are you considered a very sensitive person? I'm way too sensitive for my own good. Have you ever told someone you never wanted to speak to them again? Yes, my dad. I regret that letter I sent him so, so much. I honestly don't know how he can treat me with so much love after the shit I said. If you could watch any TV series right now, what would it be? I am... astonishingly behind on Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty. I know, seriously incredible. I just don't watch TV, man. It's strange, I'm into the show, of course I am, I just... don't like sitting myself in front of a television and purely watching it. I'll catch up, though. Do you grind your teeth, and if so, why do you do it? No. But it's not like people have a reason they grind their teeth... they just do. Do you feel the need to rant about anything right now? If so, go for it. I could, but I'm not going to. It'll just upset me. Do you have a friend named Nick? What’s his favourite food? My sister's husband's name is Nick, but he is definitely not my friend. I can't stand his bigoted, sexist, misogynistic, homophobic, racist ass. I don't know or care what his favorite food is. What are you listening to? I'm re-watching Gab and Sinow play Resident Evil 5. People can say all they want about RE5, but I love it. Do you prefer waffles or pancakes? Waffles, but only if they're still soft enough to not be considered crunchy. I prefer them because I can put peanut butter on them, and the grooves catch the syrup instead of just absorbing it all like pancakes. Do you prefer non-diet or diet soda? I don't/can't drink diet sodas because the artificial sweetener gives me a KILLER headache. Are you craving anything right now? You guys have no idea how badly I want Taco Bell for whatever reason. Which word did you say first, mama or dada? The latter. What was your first pet’s name? So, there's three answers to this. I was born into the family while we had a collie named Trigger, but I have absolutely zero memory of her. She passed when I was too young. Our first family pet that I clearly remember was Chance, our rescued cat. My first *personal* pet was either a guinea pig named Squeak or Chinese water dragon named Shadow. I can't remember who came first. Who was your best friend in elementary? It changed with the years, but I can say the three biggies were Brianna, Kim, and Quiata. Who was your favorite teacher in high school? Probably Coach Collie. He was so wise, kind, funny... He was all-around just wonderful and taught so many life lessons. When you go to a restaurant, do you have a go-to dish? Always. What is the best part of your most ordinary day? Waking up and doing my first sweep of the Internet before I get bored outta my fucking senses. Do you read any web comics? No.

Do you drink bottled water? Yeah, but like any water, it has to be COLD. Not room temperature. Not a tad chilly. I mean cooooold. When did you last use a straw? Earlier. I have a metal straw I use to drink water with because I drink faster through a straw, and with it being water, of course I want to try to drink as much as I can when I actually choose to drink water. Have you ever tackled someone to the ground? No. Do you know anyone who lies to make themselves look more interesting? My former best friend did that. She was an online friend, so it made it easy. I finally caught on and called her out on it, and then she just totally dipped. Do you like to sing? Not that much, honestly. Like sometimes I feel like it, sure, but not frequently. Are your parents in good health? No, not really. Have you ever been a caregiver to a sick/disabled relative? No. I feel bad saying it, but I know I never could be. I could NOT clean another human being. It's one of the bajillion reasons I'm not having kids. Do you like to take naps during the day? "Like" isn't the right word. I just... need to. Most days, there is NO way I can make it 'til night without one. What movie was your favorite to see in the movie theater? Even though it was sincerely a sucky movie, I really enjoyed watching Silent Hill: Revelation because I saw the 3D version, plus the hype over my favorite franchise getting a new movie was just very exciting. Favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle character? I was never into that. Ever watched The Blair Witch Project? Yes, and I positively adore it. I genuinely think it's a genius horror movie, never showing, but telling through other methods. Have a favorite AC/DC song? Probably "You Shook Me All Night Long." Are you good at selling candy for those fundraiser things? Omg nooooo I HATED doing that shit, especially when some amount of sales were like, required for whatever bullshit reason. I hate hate hate advertising to people. My parents always bought them instead. Have you ever had a crush on someone too old for you? No. Well, besides James Hetfield, ha ha. What's your favorite Dr. Suess quote? I don't know enough quotes to have one. If you were to have wings, what would you want them to look like? Dark and dragon-esque with lots of rips and tears in them... but not enough to stop me from flying, ha ha. Have you ever broken up with someone to find you want them back later? No. Has anyone ever dared you to eat a chili pepper? Did you do it? No. Have you ever tried Thai food? No. Have you ever watched Avatar? The TV show, not the movie. I've seen I think one season with Sara so far? I actually quite enjoy it. What's your cellphone's signature for text? WOW this survey is ancient. If you smoke marijuana, what is your preferred or typical method? I don't smoke it. Do you often take painkillers? I dunno about "often," but headaches to the point I take something aren't rare for me. Do you wish you were in a relationship? I mean yes, but I know it's for the better I'm not. Have you ever been to the ER? Many times. Do you ever feel guilty eating meat? I feel extremely guilty. I try not to think about it. Where have you lived for the most part of your life? Eastern NC. How old are you? 25. What are you listening to at the moment? Powerwolf came out with a new album, so I've been bingeing the shit out of some songs, ha ha. Right now it's "Blood For Blood." Do you watch WWE Raw? Ew, no. I have NEVER gotten the appeal of wrestling. Just like... why????? Do you dye your hair? Nowhere near regularly. :/ I haven't had it dyed in a very long time, and I hate it. I love colored hair. We just can't afford that expense on something so little. My hair does NOT take dye easily, so we have to have a professional do it, and that isn't exactly cheap. Have you ever lived in a different country that the one you’re living in? No. Which of your parents will you see next? I live with my mother, so. Have you fallen asleep in school? Not in class, no. In college when I would be in the library between classes, though, I've dozed before. Have you ever been hospitalized? Yes, but not for physical issues. Do you make fun of obese people? You're talking to someone who is. So obviously no, and you're a piece of fucking shit if you do. Do you have an innie or an outtie? Innie. Have you ever tried to headbang? No. Even as a metalhead, I don't get it, man. You're asking for a headache. Do you own any Converse? What do you think of them? I have a few and like them. Have you ever started a rumor? No. Have you ever been in a position of authority? I mean, I'm an admin on two sites, so I guess? Were your ancestors royalty? Yeah, I'm related to one of the Queen Victorias, I believe. I just know she had a thing for beheading people, ha ha. What do you like on your pasta/noodles? Sauce, butter, grated cheese, etc.? Just tomato sauce and meatballs, really. Who is the most ungrateful person you know? What makes them this way? My fucking ex-best friend. You could never, ever give her enough and she just... blegh. She was so fucking ungrateful for everything people did for her. It was just never enough. Do you like cherry Pepsi? I like cherry Coke. I don't like Pepsi. Have you ever held an uncommon pet before (ex: mouse, spider, snake, lizard)? I've held snakes, rats, lizards, and a tarantula. Who did you last play truth or dare with? No clue. Have you ever camped out somewhere for an event the next day? No. When were you the saddest in your life? 2016. Do you know anyone, personally, who is in an abusive relationship? Are you? No. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? Yeah, they've moved out. What was the most unique pet you’ve owned? I'd probably say my champagne ball python. A lot of people don't even know ball python morphs exist, so seeing her might surprise some people. Do you like Doritos? Yeah. When you buy clothes, do you always try them on first? No, but I need to learn how to... I just HATE doing it. Have you used bugspray recently? No. Do you enjoy swimming in the ocean? Yesssss. Have you ever tried to sew or knit anything? No. Has something ever happened to you that seemed like it was from a movie? Most of Jason's and my relationship felt like one. Hence why the breakup felt so sudden and just impossible. Do you find yourself to be a believer in love at first sight? Not even remotely. Is there something you want to do, that you swear you will, no matter what? Spread Teddy's ashes in Yellowstone. I promised him. Are you longing for the day that you’ll be an adult? (If you’re not already) I am an adult, and it sucks. What’s something you’ve vowed to never eat? Any meat that was hunted. Have you ever owned a diary/journal with a lock and key? I don't believe so. When you were little, what movie did you watch over and over? Mostly Disney films, like The Lion King and Finding Nemo. Are you deathly allergic to anything? No. Do you know what you want for your dream house? Nope. I honestly don't really care about having a "dream" house to begin with. I just need one that's cozy to me and gets the job done. Have you ever seen the movie The Notebook? Many, many times. It's my favorite romance movie. Have you ever used the photo editing site “Picnik”? No, not to my memory. Has an animal ever taken a strong dislike to you? Our old dog Bentley didn't like me all that much, and I didn't like him, either. Have you ever attempted to cut your own hair? No. Do you have a lucky or special coin? No. Do you love ice cream cake more than normal cake? No. Do you check your email daily? No. Is there anyone you know who’s in any way paralyzed? No. For you, do you commonly feel more jealousy or envy? Envy. Do you rely on the heads/tails flipping of a coin sometimes for decisions? No. Has a laptop ever burned your legs? Yes, actually. For a while many years ago, my old laptop left subtle burn marks on my legs. Anyone’s birthday coming up soon? My nephew's is next month. Do you like Laffy Taffy? I doooo. Are your biceps at all noticeable? Ha, no. Have you ever seen a walrus? Maybe when I went to SeaWorld as a kid? Did you ever have one of those easy bake ovens as a kid? Yup. If given the opportunity, would you ride on a camel? Sure. What flavor cake do you like for your birthday? Red velvet. Have you ever had a job you loved? Nope. Have you ever been in a building that was on fire? Yikes, no. Have you ever written a poem for someone? Two people. Have you been best friends with someone of a different race? Yes. Who is the person you are closest to that you’ve met online? Sara. What was the name of the first porcelain doll you got? I was very afraid of dolls as a kid, so I obviously didn't have one. Do you sell any products? If so, what? I mean, I'm a wannabe photographer that sells my service. Owls or peacocks? Owls. Lions or horses? Lions. Can you still fit into kid’s clothes? Hell no. What devotional do you read, if any? None. What do you make wishes on? I only ever do for the tradition of it on my birthday. I don't believe in the magic of wishes, though. Have you ever made a recipe you found in a magazine? No. Are you bitter about anything? Probably always will be. Have you ever been in a love triangle? No. How bad are your hangovers? Never had one. Have you ever broken a bone? If so, what was the cause of it? Yes. It was identified as a fracture, but a break and a fracture are technically like the same thing, so. At a skating rink, I fell and landed on my hand so the top of it nearly touched my arm, so my wrist got FUCKED. I will never, ever forget the severity of the pins and needles feeling and just the experience in general. It hurt so goddamn bad. Is this the best year of your life? Fuck no.

#in other words i don't feel like thinking up song lyrics for three surveys at once lmao #survey #surveys #random questions

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thefangirlslair · 4 years

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Free At Last (A Sasusaku One-Shot Fanfiction) x Purple Love VI

Note: Okay, okay. I know it’s been a while. I’ve been busy not being completely mental because of some stuff, and then this corona virus comes up and just messes up with my head furthermore. Ugh! Well, I hope you’re all safe and doing well. And of course, enjoy Sakura Day! It is our queen’s birthday, and I know i’ll never forgive myself if i don’t participate on her special day. So i hope you appreciate this one because i took a break from angst and tried a light and fluffy one. I am sO NERVOUS OMG thanks so much to everyone who keeps on reading these fics i have. Thank u thank u!!!

PS. This is also up on my ffnet! Let me know your thoughts! Again, Happy Birthday Uchiha Sakura!!!!!!!!!! MY QUEEN I LOB U

Excerpt: This might be her second birthday since he knew her, first as her boyfriend, but he feels like he’s known her for a long time. He wants to be there on her birthday every year, forever, as long as she’ll have him.

SasuSaku Pairing (2,578 words)

A Poor Attempt at Writing Fics

Sasusaku Edition XXV

Free At Last

Not even grainy resolutions of webcam cameras and shitty internet connections can ever hide her wide-blown grin. May it be over a monitor, your smartphone or in person, Haruno Sakura’s smile will always be as beautiful as its owner. And it’s even much brighter now that her team is singing her happy birthday through her computer screen.

Boisterous laughter followed after all the singing because was that Lee-san who croaked that last note?

“That was awful, Eyebrows!”, laughed Naruto, some dramatic tears leaking from the corners of his happy blue eyes and his tongue slipping the familiar nickname outside work. “Was that you or you have a pet frog?” The addressed man cannot be seen beyond his webcam because he was busy lying under his desk because Sakura-san! I have failed to sing the best happy birthday song! Shame on me!

Almost choking on her drink, Tenten interrupted, “Hey Naruto, we’re still technically at work even though we’re working from home. Stop with the nicknames until later!”

“C’mon, buns! It’s not as if Boss is here to murder us with his glare! And it’s just another 10 minutes before our shift ends; we need to celebrate Sakura-chan's birthday at least!”, the blond whined as an answer.

“Aww, thanks so much guys!”, Sakura smiled. “Naruto, stop teasing Lee-san. And listen to Tenten, we still need to be professional while we’re still at work. I wish we are together at the office though! I would’ve loved to celebrate with you all, too.”

Another blue-eyed, blonde person answered. “Ugh, tell me about it. I’d rather be at the office right now and listen to Naruto’s obnoxious voice than be with a lazy ass and be bored out of my mind like someone over here..” Ino’s annoyed face and an even more annoyed voice rang through their earphones and speakers, noting the emphasis on some words about her boyfriend who rolled his eyes. In the background, you can hear Tenten’s Language!

They can all see Shikamaru, the boyfriend, who simply smirked, looked sideways at his workmate/girlfriend and lazily drawled, “You love this lazy ass.”

Series of ‘OHHHHHH’ can be heard from Kiba, Tenten and Naruto while Lee choked some more and laid again under his desk. Sakura just laughed at her best friend’s face because Ino was trying so hard not to blush that she covered her almost-red face and slapped Shikamaru’s arm at reach. Sakura even heard the man chuckled under his breath.

“Shika, you smooth fucker,” Kiba teased. “Teach us your ways!”

Tenten growled, “Inuzuka, if you don’t shut the fuck u-”

“Weren’t you the one who said to remain professional and mind our language while at work, Tenten-san?”, Lee’s head came up to peek onto the camera and asked his innocent question. He ducked again when the brunette’s eyes flashed for a second and escaped before she unleashes her rage on him.

Sakura’s laughter was light and happy, her green eyes sparkling with mirth. These people’s faces on her screen belong to not just her team at work but her friends. Her second family. Or maybe third? she thought.

They spend more than 40 hours a week together whether it be stressing over clients at work, drinking coffee at the pantry, pizza parlor visits after shift, and ice creams every payday. And now that she realized that it has been two long months since they worked from home, now at their last day of quarantine, let alone on her birthday, she misses them. Terribly so.

“I miss you guys. Really,” she said, her voice a bit lower than usual, which means she’s serious. Her friends saw it and immediately stopped their bickering. “I didn't have anyone before until Naruto and Ino came along. Then came Tenten, then Shikamaru... until Kiba and then lastly, Lee-san. It’s been 10 years since my first celebration with the blonds, but I feel like I’ve been celebrating it with all 7 of you ever since.” She smiled again, “Thank you for always being with me on my day.”

A few moments passed and finally, a chorus of incomprehensible words were heard through Sakura’s speakers because they all reacted at the same time:

“Sakura-chaaan! Don’t be sad! I’ll be sad too!”

“Cut... hik... cut the drama f-forehead! I d-.. I don’t want it!... hik...”

“Ah... now you want me to fall for you now, huh? Stop, damn it Sakura..”

“Girl, don’t touch my fucking heart like that. You already know we got you always.”

“SAKURA-SAAAAAAAAAN!!!”

Sakura watched it all with glowing eyes and a full heart. She looked one by one on their blurry little faces and she felt love just seep through her pores. She’s finally seeing them next week since the quarantine is finally over and there will be no need to hide from the pandemic that affected the rest of the world.

They’re still busy reeling over Sakura’s mini birthday speech and the rosette is overwhelmed with emotions when they heard Shikamaru asked, “Seven?”

“Huh?”, Sakura confusedly asked back.

“We’re only six here, excluding you, but you said ‘all 7 of you’ earlier.”

All eyes turned to her and she felt nervous. Crap, I slipped!

“Oh,” she started, nervously added an awkward laugh. “I meant six! I might be more tired than usual then. We had to talk to a lot of clients today anyway, right?”

She knew she didn’t convince Shikamaru and the rest of her friends, so she thanked all the deities she knew when her phone rang and Kakashi’s name flashed on her screen. She took it as an opportunity to escape more questions from them and so she said, “I gotta take this call, it’s my old high school teacher.”

She muted their audio of their conference call and opened the window of her emails instead to hide her screen and chat box. Sakura went to the balcony to answer the call.

Little did she know that she forgot to turn off her camera.

“Did you notice she was acting weird?”

“She absolutely did, right? She looked nervous earlier. Do you know something about this, Naruto?”

“No! She tells us everything but for the past few months, she’s been a little secretive, I think. It also doesn’t help that we’ve been in quarantine for 2 months! Is she still my best friend, Ino-chan?”

“First of all, I am her best friend and not you. And second, I agree. Ugh, this Forehead is making my head hurt!”

“Don’t judge Sakura-san! She’s a good friend! If she wants to tell us something, she will!”

“I don’t care about her secret or whatever, all I want to know where her house is because look at her room. So fucking huge!”

“That’s not her house, Kiba. Forehead said she’s staying at her mom’s friend because she’s alone at her apartment.”

“Yeah, Sakura-chan's room is much brighter and full of flowers! The room they gave her now is so boring, look! It’s either black or gray!”

“I wouldn’t mind. The size of that room is almost as big as my entire apartment. That bed looks something I want to break with Neji.”

“Tenten-san!! Control yourself!!!”

“Y’all are so noisy even in chat.”

“Shut up, ponytail!”

A movement from Sakura’s camera caught everyone’s attention. Her computer is located at the corner of the room so they could see a part of the queen size bed and has a direct view of the bedroom door. The knob turned and someone entered the room.

“WHO’S THAT?!!!”

“SOMEONE ENTERED SAKURA-SAN'S ROOM!!”

“Is that her mom’s friend?”

“Stop panicking idiots!”

“THEY BETTER LEAVE SAKURA-CHAN ALONE!!!”

“Wait...”

“Is that....?”

“OHMYFGOFDD”

“IS THAT BOSS TEME???!”

“Holy shit..”

“Damn he’s so fucking hot in sweatpants...”

“Why is he there??????”

“UCHIHA-SAN IS IN SAKURA-SAN'S ROOM!!!!!”

“I see... this could be why Sakura said 7.”

“NOOOO! THIS CAN’T BE! SAKURA-CHAN WON’T DATE THAT ASSHOLE! SHE CAN’T!!”

Stood inside the room is no other than their young CEO, Uchiha Sasuke, dressed in casual gray sweatpants and thin white t-shirt. If not because of his wild black hair and intimidating aura, they wouldn’t even know it’s him. They have always seen him in crisp suits and perfect posture, maybe once in a bomber jacket and ripped jeans, but this is the first time they’ve seen him in comfortable clothes with his usual stiff shoulders a bit relaxed and his hands casually tucked in his pockets.

Another movement from the other corner of the room, and Sakura came into view. They didn’t know she was only wearing a big shirt that barely covered her thighs, and the chat room exploded again.

“Sakura’s so hot, damn..”

“HOY DOG-BREATH, LOOK AWAY!!! STOP HOUNDING SAKURA-CHAN!!”

“YAAAS GET THAT ASS GIRL!!”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! FOREHEAD IS BANGING OUR BOSS! THAT’S SO HOT”

They watched in awe when the two met in the middle of the room and Sakura tiptoed and wrapped her arms around Sasuke’s neck. Their boss leaned down and held her hips, his face hidden within her pink locks.

The scene didn’t have any audio for their mini audience but even without it, they know the two are speaking in whispers, with Sakura’s head nodding and Sasuke’s hands running over her waist and back as indications. They felt like intruders and most of them almost blushed because of the affection and intimacy, excluding one who definitely passed out under his desk, so they decided to leave the two.

“Let’s leave them alone now, things might get pretty hot. I don’t wanna see my best friend shagging my boss, no matter how proud I am of her.”

“INO-CHAN! WE GOTTA HELP SAKURA-CHAN ESCAPE! WHAT IF HE’S HOLDING HER HOSTAGE???”

“Idiot..”

“Sakura can take me hostage any time though..”

“Wait, I just want to see Boss Uchiha topless before we go!”

Sasuke pulled away for a bit to look at Sakura, his birthday girl, and poked her forehead with his two fingers. His two arms wrapped around her waist again after the gesture, “Are you done for today?”

She nodded in affirmative as her hands roam around his shoulders and looped around his neck, “I almost slipped earlier though. They almost knew I have a b-..boyf-”

He smirked. They have been secretly dating for almost 4 months now but she still blushes more than usual when she tries to address him as her boyfriend. He remembered the time he introduced her to his parents as his girlfriend and she was redder than his favorite fruit the entire dinner. That was fun.

She’s his employee, he knows. Sakura’s been working for his company for more than a year now and ever since he laid his eyes on her and saw her potential, wit and charm—he knows she’s his endgame.

It’s been a long pursuit for him, being her boss and all, and her righteous perspective about everything. So when she finally gave in to her own feelings and decided to say yes to being his, he decided to never let Haruno Sakura go. Even if she decides to fight tooth and nail for her freedom from him, he will do the same to keep her. Maybe not as an employee, because that would mean he will be free to take her on lunch dates, but as his lover.

I like that, he thought. Lover.

Sasuke peered at her blushing face, her emerald eyes downcast because of embarassment, her enticing full pink lips on display that she keeps on licking and biting. Sasuke’s eyes twitched because of the sight.

“Annoying,” he almost growled under his breath. Is she aware of her effect on him?

Before she could even ask, Sasuke ducked his head down to press his mouth on hers. His hand went to the back of her head to tilt it a little upwards so he could taste deeper and he was rewarded by the opening of her mouth and the quiet moan that he drank greedily from her.

As much as he wants to call it a night and just bury himself with her and in her, she hasn’t eaten yet because his hard-headed and annoying employee still worked at home on her birthday. He baked a strawberry cake downstairs while she thought he’s busy working with investors on his office. He spent the entire day in his kitchen Facetiming with his mother to guide his baking. He’s never seen his mother so ecstatic because of him.

He came back to his senses when he felt slightly cold hands under his shirt and he fought the urge to throw her onto the bed they have been occupying for the past 2 months of quarantine and just ravish her all night. Sasuke moved both his hands and held her face as he savored more of her lips by a few flicks of his tongue before he gently pulled away.

This might be her second birthday since he knew her, first as her boyfriend, but he feels like he’s known her for a long time. He wants to be there on her birthday every year, forever, as long as she’ll have him. “Happy birthday,” he simply said, tenderly looking at her gorgeous face.

Her smile was blinding and her green irises glimmer against the setting sun. “Thank you, Sasuke-kun,” Sakura softly answered. “I love you so much.”

He pecked her lips again, lingering a bit more, and murmured against her mouth. “Love you.” He felt her smile, and he smiled back.

A small blink from the corner of his eyes got his attention and he noticed the tops of her laptop’s screen with a little light, indicating that the camera is on. Sasuke turned to Sakura, “Go downstairs and wait for me. Let’s eat dinner. I’ll just take a shower.”

Sakura nodded and happily skipped across the room and slipped outside the bedroom to wait for him downstairs. Sasuke stood for a moment looking at the door and slowly walked toward his, their, dresser. He took off his t-shirt and tossed it carelessly on the floor. He took a deep breath and finally approached Sakura’s computer on the side.

He clicked the program that runs the conference call and was greeted by her team’s shocked faces. He saw one window where Rock Lee was supposed to be but he didn’t see anyone aside from the crooked angle of the camera and are those his feet under the table? He scoffed inwardly. Guess you’ll give up pursuing her now. She’s mine.

He did a lazy sweep of his dark eyes one by one on their faces and remembered them in the future if they decide to blame Sakura for not telling this secret. Of course, they both wanted to show the world that they’re together but they still need to be a little cautious. Yes, they’re her friends and her team, but he’s not gonna be lenient especially when it comes to Sakura.

Sasuke thought the look in his eyes were effective because they all sat a little straighter. His job is now done, and now it’s time to shower so he could celebrate the entire night with Sakura. His spine tingled in anticipation.

He looked directly at the little camera above and gave his signature smirk before he logged out her account and closed Sakura’s laptop. He stretched like a feline and his grin went wider as he stripped for his shower.

Let’s just say it was an interesting first day back at the office the following Monday.

~fin~

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sammysreelreviews · 5 years

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5 Foreign Netflix Original TV Shows I Could Not Stop Watching

Hello everyone I am back after a week hiatus! To be honest the Black Mirror ranking took a lot out of me so I gave myself a week to relax and watch y’all hate on it. Any who if you know me you know I’m always down for a good foreign TV show and Netflix has quite a few that are EXCELLENT. These are the 5 shows I am personally obsessed with but I would love for you to comment any suggestions! I was gonna add the German show Perfume but I didn’t finish it in time but so far so good! Okay enjoy the list and as always, happy binging!

1. Quicksand (2019 - )

Quicksand, the best foreign Netflix original, is about 18 year old Maja (Hanna Ardéh) who is the only one left alive in a mass shooting in her classroom. The show backtracks to the events leading up to the shooting while she is getting ready for court. *inhales* *exhales* AHHHHHHHHHHH THIS SHOW IS THE MOTHERFUCKING SHIT Y’ALL. WHEW I MEAN THE OTHER GURLS JUST AREN’T DOING IT!!! I mean this show is just impressive to be honest. They handled such a sensitive topic and shot the show perfectly. I truly believe that movies and shows shot in Europe just look better and Quicksand is proof. Even when it’s cloudy they make Sweden and France look absolutely picturesque. The acting is also spectacular the kids absolutely killed it especially Felix Sandman who plays Sebastian. Ugh y’all need to watch this damn show! Also, *SPOILER ALERT IF YOU’VE SEEN THE SHOW SKINS* if you have seen skins season 6 episode 4 please comment or message me I have so many comparisons!!!

2. Elite (2019 - )

This Spanish original show is exactly the sexy teen drama the doctor ordered. If you miss Gossip Girl boy this is the show for you. The best part is that this show has a murder to solve and honestly I had no idea who it was until it was revealed. I’ve wrote about Elite before so I’ll keep this short. If you like teens with money, hot older brother bad boy types, private schools, outsiders attending private school, and murder this is the show for you. Oh, and if you become obsessed, which you will, don’t worry season two is already filming.

3. Dark (2017 - )

Netflix’s very first German original show is about how two kids who go missing from a small german town but they’re not the first. Okay this show is like so weird at first but omg it’s literally so addicting. I really can’t say much cause I don’t want to give anything away but you definitely will not be disappointed. It’s kind of annoying how Europe sometimes just does better shit than us like why can’t all our shows be at this caliber!?! The cinematography is so fucking perfect for the genre and the acting is amazing. I was honestly so scared when it took them so long to make a second season cause I couldn’t stop thinking about it! Luckily the second season premieres June 21st and Netflix has announced that this will be a trilogy so the third season will sadly be its last.

4. Baby (2018 - )

Baby is an Italian Netflix original coming of age story set in the rich part of Rome that is sort of like Elite but with no murder. At first try I honestly didn’t like Baby cause I thought it was boring but for some reason I couldn’t stop thinking about the characters so I went back and finished it and I’m really glad I did. Popular Chiara (Bendetta Porcaroli) becomes friends with rebel Ludovica (Alice Pagani) and they start to make questionable decisions. I stan a good coming of age and the acting, you guessed it, is great. The show is only six episodes long which makes for very easy binging and season two is on the way.

5. Narcos (2015 - 2017)

Ok so technically Narcos is an American show BUT it is also Colombian so its going on the fucking list. People always ask what’s good on Netflix and my favorite Netflix show of all time is 100% Narcos. There is just no competition I mean yes it is based on real events and also filmed in those places but it’s just so damn GOOD. I’ve never seen a show that just ones up itself every fucking season. The first two seasons are all about Pablo Escobar and the third is about the Cali Cartel and boy the third season left me fucking SHOOK. The beginning of the seventh episode deserves a Globe ALONE. Sadly the third season was the last but if you’re craving more drug related crime don’t worry you can watch Narcos: Mexico which is about the Guadalajara Cartel and stars Diego Luna. Ugh please watch this fucking show cause honestly I am tired of telling you to watch it. Also I am just OBSESSED with the theme song I’ve never skipped it.

#baby netflix #baby #narcos #diego luna #quicksand netflix #quicksand #felix sandman #elite #elite netflix #netflix suggestions #netflix recommendations #dark netflix #dark #netflix originals

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janiedean · 4 years

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Because you might need something to take your mind off all the stupid...

… and this isn’t particularly good or funny, and it probably requires a lot of editing and some semblance of coherent word choices, but maybe it’ll make you smile a little, if only for the knowledge that one of your works inspired it. I wrote this little scene a while ago after reading “as beautiful as you”, having my soul just a little bit irreparably wrecked by the part where Jaime wakes Brienne by giving her a sword rather than kissing her or taking a sword from her, and having my brain immediately jump to, “Yes, but do you know why you love this so much?”

It feels like it should be part of a bigger story, but knowing me, it’s probably not getting anywhere anytime soon. All I’ve got right now is that the sparrow is actually a human (or humanoid?) who got cursed into a bird for whatever reason and must mentor a true hero to break the spell. He’s also kind of dick, which probably makes things more difficult than they should really be.

So, well, here it goes:

“«So,» said Jack. «Here she is. But how should I wake her?»

The sparrow fluttered his wings as if to shrug, then flew from his shoulder and went to hover over the princess’ still body. He considered it for a moment, then said: «Usually, a kiss is enough.»

Jack startled. «A kiss?»

His companion landed beside the princess’ head and fixed him with one of those stares of his that always managed to look much more annoyed than his features should have allowed. «A kiss,» he repeated. «You know, when you press your mouth to another’s? I know for a fact that even peasants know how to kiss.»

Jack chose to ignore that last sentence. He came closer and looked down on the princess where she laid, rather comfortably or so it seemed, on a pile of embroidered blankets and pillows. Her loose, flame-red curls spilled out from under her gleaming helmet and onto the costly fabrics of deepest blue and brightest green, and she was tall and broad-shouldered under her chainmail, which looked as if it was made of rings of silver, the way it shined in the golden mid-morning sun. She had a tiny smile on her full, pink lips, and the fingers of her right hand were wrapped around the bejeweled hilt of a sword, not gripping it forcefully yet not holding it loosely, either. There was no stiffness to her features or her limbs; she looked peaceful, and in a way, almost confident. «I can’t kiss her,» Jack said.

«What? But we’ve come all the way up here! And it’s your quest! You’ll be a hero!»

Jack looked to where the sparrow was hopping frantically on the ground. «I don’t really think heroes run around kissing sleeping strangers. Not until they’ve woken them up and asked them whether they wish to be kissed, at least.» He didn’t answer the bird’s muttered, oh, you’d be surprised. Instead, he asked him: «Is there no other way?»

The sparrow stopped and sighed. He managed to look pensive. «Well, you could take off her armor and helmet, I guess. Get rid of the sword, too. This kind of thing sometimes happens as punishment to wayward daughters who won’t get out of their hauberks and into a nice dress to go find themselves a husband, and who’d rather play with steel swords than… oh, what is it, now?»

«If that’s the case, it seems to me that she was punished for a very wrong reason, and that it would also be wrong to help in her punishment by stealing her armor and weapon. And look how brightly they shine! She must care for them a great deal.»

«Who even talked about stealing? Just take them off of her, put them aside, and give them back when she wakes!»

Jack pondered over this option. «But it still sounds wrong, and quite a bit rude. I wouldn’t blame the princess, if she woke up and got mad at me for manhandling her and undressing her as she slept, and on top of it all, taking the things she loves away from her as if I was trying to punish her, too. I could try to calm her down and explain the situation, sure…» A thought came upon him. «But is she even being punished? She looks happy and comfortable enough. Are you sure she’s really being kept on the mountain by someone else, and that she’s not here by her own will?»

The sparrow gave a brief, high shriek. Then, he quieted down and said quietly and slowly, sweet as overripe fruit: «Do you think young royal ladies just climb on the highest, steepest mountain available in the middle of nowhere to sleep for a thousand years? Now, that seems a bit much for a beauty sleep, doesn’t it? And what about all the brave knights who came to rescue her through the centuries, and even battled with the damned dragon?»

«The dragon wasn’t even really there to guard her. She just needed a quiet place to stay as she waited to heal from her illness, but every few decades, someone came to attack her, and all that ruckus kept slowing down her recovery. None of those knights even bothered to take a good look at her and find out that belching out flames at random intervals is the draconic equivalent to hiccups.»

«Well, they were a little too caught up in acting like real heroes to play nurse to a gigantic monster with very sharp claws and teeth that can also spit fire, I assume.»

«But their heroic methods didn’t work, did they?»

The sparrow averted his gaze and was silent for a moment. «Well, no. Not really. Still…»

Jack crouched next to the princess, stared at her fair face, and patted her hand gently. «Your Highness, won’t you please wake up?» he asked her. «I don’t mean to disturb you, but it is very late.»

«Oh, alright! Just keep doing whatever you,» started the sparrow in a bitter voice, but he was soon cut off by the princess herself mumbling something unintelligible. She did it again as she slowly moved this way and that, and then she let go of the sword, stretched out her strong arms and legs and let out a big yawn. When she finally opened her eyes, they were a clear blue, if somewhat unfocused. But after she rubbed at them with her hand, they seemed much more alert.

«Yes,» she said a bit groggily, pushing herself in a sitting position and turning to look at Jack. She took off her helmet and laid it down next to the sword. «I know it must be late. How long did it take you to understand? Or did my father figure it out all on his own before he sent for you?»

Jack and the sparrow exchanged a glance. «Um. It took one thousand years. And six months. Um,» said the sparrow. Jack wanted to reach out a hand and pat his little head, but he thought better of it. The sparrow wasn’t usually one for that kind of thing.

The princess let out an incredulous laugh. «That long? Truly?» She shook her head, her wild curls flying around her face. «I had thought the stubborn old goat would just keep looking for the eager grooms most like himself at first, but I had also hoped he’d swap them for more fitting choices sooner than this. Are the words, I don’t want a husband who only knows how to demand and order and act against my will and who wouldn’t know a polite question if it hit him right in his stupid, ugly mug, so very difficult to make sense of?»

«They aren’t,» Jack agreed.

«You’d think so, now, wouldn’t you. But then again, if they weren’t, I wouldn’t have had to set up my little trial in the first place. Ah, well, but at least I have enjoyed a very nice nap and I feel quite well-rested. It would have been better, if not for all those cretins and cowards trying to kiss me or do even worse… I did think to wake up for a little while to teach them a lesson, but there was some creature that took care of them before I ever could. As the enchantments I put on my belongings took care of the thieves and their grasping hands, of course.»

«Does that mean you’re a witch, Your Highness?» asked the sparrow, a little too hastily.

The princess turned to look at him and sat herself more comfortably. Her face softened and when she answered, her amusement seemed more sincere, laced as it was with kindness rather than exasperation. «Well, how do you think I’ve managed to sleep for a thousand years and then another six months still, little bird? And how could my father still be alive, if magic did not run though our line?»

«We don’t know whether your father still lives, because we’ve never met him,» clarified Jack, and felt bad for not telling her sooner. «We didn’t even come here as grooms. We were just looking for a heroic quest to fulfill.»

The princess turned towards him once more and scrunched up her brows, as if trying to decide if she should believe him. She must have realized he was speaking honestly, because eventually she patted his hand as he had done with hers. «Oh, no need for that sour face. I mean no offense, but I am glad this tiny sparrow here isn’t vying with you for my hand… and even you would have had to spend at least a few months courting me. The trial was only ever meant to find me a man I could accept as a possible groom.» She rose to her feet. «As for my father, I doubt he’d let himself die before seeing me up and about once more. I told you, he’s stubborn. And in truth we do care for each other, though it might not always seem so. Now, I remember there was a stream down there, and I need to make myself a little more presentable. When I’m done, if you’ll help me back to my father’s keep, I’ll have him feed you and give you fresh clothes and a place to rest before you go back to your quests, and whatever else you might need.»

With that, she rolled her shoulder, stretched out her arms again, and went her own way.

«Are we going with her?» Jack asked the sparrow.

The sparrow answered him: «Well, yes. You’re a hero, now, I guess. Technically, at least. And heroes do get their rewards from their princesses and their princesses’ fathers… even if it usually doesn’t go quite like this.»

Jack nodded. Food and rest and fresh clothes seemed nice, anyway.”

----

OMG THIS IS ADORABLE AND PLEASE IF YOU EVER FEEL LIKE WRITING THE FULL THING I’M 100% DOWN TO READ IT also I ship these two already like fed-ex, the crack is delightful because hONESTLY IT JUST TOOK ASKING HER XKLGKJSDGJLJDKLG I LOVE MY TROPES DECONSTRUCTION, the princess is honestly to die for, HE’S ADORABLE tho admittedly ofc the sparrow is the best lmao oh god now I want him and pigeon ned to meet or smth xDDDDD ALSO THE DRAGON BEING SICK KILLED ME SDKLGDSLJJKG THIS WHOLE THING WAS JUST SO PRECIOUS THANKS I 100% COULD HAVE USED READING IT ;___;

#submitted #not mine #submission #haljathefangirlcat #flkjgjklsdjkgljklds #THIS IS SO PRESH <333333333 #jaime x brienne for ts #sdlkgljksdlgkjgklsjdglkjsdlkgjlkdgjskljdsgdksgj #I CAN BELIEVE SHE FEELS REFRESHED I need that nap too tbh

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thefactsofthematter · 5 years

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Hello! Could you do "I love you" prompts 6 ("On a sunny Tuesday afternoon, the late sunlight glowing in your hair") and 12 ("When we lay together on the fresh spring grass") for Jack/ Davey or Race/ Albert? Thanks so much and happy Valentine's Day!

omg i’m sorry this took so long!! (as we can see from “happy valentines day” jhhbgh) i took a break from writing but i’m back babey!!!

javid; 2k; uhh ambiguous time setting? sorta modern era but maybe it’s like,, the 60s or something; no content warnings! just fluff!

i highly recommend listening to “fishin’ in the dark” while reading this— it sets the tone perfectly.

It’s Davey’s first summer in the country, and he’s still not sure how he feels about it.

They’d moved here in the middle of the school year, leaving behind everything he’d once known in the heart of New York City, in exchange for a new life in a tiny little town. His father had lost his job back home, and instead of seeing it as a setback, his folks had taken it as an opportunity to start over somewhere else, across the country.

It’s not all bad, Davey figures.

He’s made a lot of friends— the kids at school were incredibly inviting, though you sort of have to be when there’s only five or six people in each grade. If anything, they were entertained by Davey’s fascinating stories of the big city, and his lack of knowledge of anything farming-related. He can’t complain; at least he has friends here, he certainly didn’t have many in New York.

Manhattan also didn’t have all this fresh air and gorgeous weather. It didn’t have the wonderful house they live in now— he’d grown up in a tiny apartment with all five of them crammed into just a couple of rooms. There’s definitely much more free space around here. He’s even got his own bedroom, free from sharing with Les.

And, well, New York didn’t have Jack.

Sweet, lovely Jack, who lives just down the street. Jack, who runs around barefoot, wears a tattered old cowboy hat, sings country songs, and drives a rust-bucket truck. Jack, who’s got the smoothest southern drawl in the world, and a year-round farmer’s tan. Jack, who Davey is head over heels for.

Speak of the devil…

“Hey Davey-boy! What'cha up to?”

There’s Jack, leaning over the back fence of the Jacobs’s yard, the brim of his hat not able to shade the brightness of his smile. Davey has been pulling weeds from the garden all morning, but it’s starting to get a little too hot and sunny to keep going without collapsing from heatstroke.

“Not much of anything,” he replies, dropping his pail of dandelions into the dirt. “I’m about finished with this. What are you doing here? I thought you were working on Al’s family’s farm for the next little while.”

Jack shrugs, still grinning happily, like he hasn’t got a care in the world.

“It’s my day off. Medda wanted me home for a bit to fix some stuff up for her, but I finished it real quick, so I’ve got some free time.” He seems almost nervous as he scuffs at the dirt with his foot and adjusts his hat so Davey can see more of his face. “Say, if you’re all done here, how’d you like to hang around with me for a while? I’ve got somewhere real neat that I wanna take you, I think you’ll really like it.”

Davey raises an eyebrow, intrigued.

“I don’t see why not,” he says, dusting the dirt off of his knees and picking his pail back up to toss the dandelions in the garbage bin. “I’ll let my mom know I’m going out and see if there’s anything she needs me to do first. I’ll meet you at your place in a bit?”

Jack’s smile widens, if that’s even possible.

“Sounds good! See ya in a bit, city slicker!”

And with that, he’s gone, darting back down the alley towards Medda’s place.

Davey shakes his head fondly, unable to wipe the smile from his face.

Twenty minutes later, they’re rolling along a gravel road in Jack’s truck. There’s mason jars of Medda’s signature sweet tea in their cup holders, and they’ve got the windows rolled down to let the breeze cool them off.

“So I’ve never been to a big city,” says Jack, breaking the easy silence they’d settled into. “Do y'all got grass there? And trees? Or is it all buildings?”

Davey can’t help but laugh. He sometimes imagines what his life would’ve been like if he’d lived here from the beginning, like Jack and all their other friends that have no idea of the hustle and bustle of New York.

“In parks, there’s trees and grass, yeah,” he replies, recalling the afternoons that he and Sarah used to drag Les over to Central Park in their rusty old wagon. “But not all over the place, the way it is here. New York is a lot of grey— the sidewalks, the buildings, even the air. It was just… dark and sad, a lot of the time. The longer I’m away from it, the less I miss it. I think I’m happier here.”

Jack’s grin is confirmation enough that Davey is, in fact, much happier here.

“I’m glad you’re happy,” Jack replies, while tapping his hands absentmindedly on the steering wheel. “I ain’t ever had a friend like you before. I’m really happy you’re here.”

Twenty or so more minutes of driving finds them turning off the road to start down the long driveway of what looks like someone’s farm.

“Are we even allowed to be here?” asks Davey, as they roll right past an abandoned-looking house and quonset. “Who’s farm is this? Are we gonna get in trouble?”

Jack just chuckles and sips on the last of his sweet tea. There’s thankfully a few more jars of it in the backseat, courtesy of Medda, so they’ve got plenty to last the afternoon.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says, shaking his head. “We’re fine. This is, like, technically, sort of… my land? I used to live out here with my dad, but after he died, no one comes out here anymore. I like to come sometimes just to hang out. It’ll be mine once I’m old enough to farm it— since I can’t really do it by myself at seventeen, right? That’s why I live with Medda for now, and I work out at Al’s farm ‘cause his dad is teaching me everything I need to do. Awful nice of him, ain’t it?”

Even with such a sad topic, Jack is still smiling, like the happiness of getting to carry on his dad’s farm outweighs the sadness of losing him.

“Sure is, yeah,” says Davey, trying to reciprocate Jack’s little laugh. “I’m sorry about your dad, though. That had to be really hard.”

Jack shrugs one shoulder and seems about to reply, but he’s pulled out of the conversation as he suddenly whips the truck off the gravel road and onto a well worn trail through the brush.

“Oh, here we go!” he yells, before stepping on the gas pedal with full force. Well, that’s one way to change the topic. “Hang on, Davey-boy! It’s about to get real bumpy!”

Davey shrieks as they begin to pick up speed, practically flying down the dirt trail. He’s absolutely terrified for his life, but the way Jack is howling with excited laughter sort of makes this worth it.

“Jack Kelly!” screams Davey, not quite able to stop himself from laughing too. “You’re insane! We’re gonna die!”

Jack can’t seem to stop laughing but he pats Davey’s shoulder reassuringly.

“Just hold on!” he yells, as the truck flies over a bump and bounces as it lands. “I won’t let anything happen! You’re safe with me!”

Davey isn’t sure at what point he began to trust Jack so much, but for some reason, he believes it. He just grips the handle above the door for dear life and decides he might as well live in the moment for a bit.

He’s gonna be just fine.

When they finally pull up to where Jack had been trying to take them and climb out of the truck, Davey realizes that the terrifying joy-ride had totally been worth it.

It’s a clearing in the trees, a big grassy patch, with a creek running right through the middle. If he looks far enough down the rolling water, there’s a beaver dam within sight— something he’s never seen in real life before. Sunlight is streaming down in golden rays, lighting both the scenery and Jack’s tan face in the most gorgeous way.

“You like it?” asks Jack, tipping back his hat to reveal more of his face. “I ain’t ever brought anyone here. It was me and my mom’s favourite place to come hang out. We used to have picnics here all the time.”

There’s a kind of wistful look on his face, and Davey kind of really wants to kiss him. Is that weird? He’s not really sure, but it’s probably best not to overthink it.

“I love it, Jack,” says Davey, rather sure his voice is giving away just how smitten he is. “This is beautiful… and I’m happy you trust me enough to show it to me. Thank you, Jackie.”

Jack seems caught off-guard by the sincerity, but his face eventually widens into a huge grin.

“Let’s have lunch,” is all he says, seemingly not sure how to respond to Davey’s words. It might just be the heat, but Davey swears there’s a blush across Jack’s cheeks. “Pick us a spot on the grass, I’ll get the food out. We’ll have to thank Medda for it later.”

With that, the two boys turn in opposite directions and try to recover from that strangely soft interaction. Davey wanders down to the water and slips his shoes off so he can dip his foot in— it’s surprisingly cool and refreshing. He opts to sit down right there, his feet dangling in the creek as minnows nip at his toes.

“Good choice,” says Jack, moments later, as he approaches behind Davey and sits on the grass next to him. “The water’s sure nice, ain’t it?”

“Yeah,” replies Davey, suddenly feeling very shy as Jack slings an arm around his shoulders and leans into his side. Holy shit. “It’s really nice. Colder than I was expecting.”

“Really now?” Jack reaches down to cup a handful of water and fling it in Davey’s face. “How’s that?”

Davey immediately retaliates, splashing a much more significant amount of water up onto Jack. Both of them are laughing hard, any thoughts of having lunch flying right out the window.

“That’s it, you’re on,” Jack growls, before sneakily wrestling Davey right into the creek. Both of them go down, tumbling fully-clothed into the shallow, cold water. “Take that, Davey-boy!”

The water-fight lasts several minutes and ends with no clear winner. They simply grow tired of it and flop onto the grass, exhausted.

It takes Davey a moment to process just how close together they are. Jack is laying against him, laughing into the crook of his neck. They’re both soaking wet and freezing cold— though it’ll likely only take a few minutes for the sun to warm them up. This means Davey has to act very quickly.

Before he can get caught up in his head and get too nervous to do it, he swallows his fear and presses a quick kiss to Jack’s cheek. Jack’s laughter ceases and he looks up at Davey— he thankfully doesn’t look angry, mostly just confused.

“I hope that was okay,” Davey quickly says, the weight of what he’s just done finally hitting him. “I didn’t mean to cross a line, I just really like you, and—”

He finds himself cut off by Jack’s lips pressing against his own. It takes him a second to process it, but he eventually smiles into the kiss and lets his arms sneak around Jack’s neck to hold him close. He’s not sure he’s ever been this happy before.

“I really like you too,” Jack replies, once they pull away for breath. “So much, Davey. I’m so happy to have you.”

With that, he reconnects their lips and they stay that way for a long while, sunlight streaming over them as birds chirp in the background.

Davey is really, really glad they moved to the country.

Tag list:

@landlessbud @eponinemylove @i-got-personality @alovelymoonbeam @penzyroamin @graceful-popcorn @bencookisagod @auspicioustarantula @neverplannedonsomeonelikeyou @orollyitsracetrackhiggins @backgroundnewsies @magimerlyn @myheartissetinmotion @papesdontsellthemselves @supremebesson @justasadcryptid @marvels-ninja @aw-jus-let-em-try @big-potato-asshole @stop-the-presses @fameworks-quicker @wilde-guess @never-fear-brooklyns-here @r-a-c-e-t-r-a-c-k @fandom-fangirl07 @theresagoodchanceicouldfly @dying-poet

#my writing #newsies #jack kelly #davey jacobs #javid #yee yee!!!! this was fun #jack kelly deserves to be a cowboy in more fics #its his dream ok??

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intricately-silly · 5 years

Photo

Get to Know Me Tag

I was tagged by @thesimparrot

Ok. So this was sitting in my drafts waiting for the picture for about three years, and I didn’t want to NOT post it. So here it is, very very very late. It did give me a reason to update my simself though.

Thank you for tagging me friend! <3 <3 <3 Also, omg that’s so many questions... Who is really going to want to know all this about me?

Rules: Post a pic of your simself with your traits and answer the questions!

Traits: goofball + perfectionist + loner

Honestly, how am I supposed to only pick three traits? I’m a complicated individual. I’m intricately silly. Anyway...

1. What is your full name? Skye. That’s all you get.

2. What is your nickname? Well actually, Skye is technically my nickname...

3. When is your birthday? August 8th.

4. What is your favorite book series? Hmm... I don’t know. I tend to like individual books rather than series. Although I read the Hunger Games series a while back and I liked that one.

5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? I mean, there’s nothing to disprove it. But I wouldn’t say I fully believe in them either.

6. Who is your favorite author? I don’t really have one.

7. What is your favorite radio station? I really like a station on Pandora called Summer Hits of the 90′s.

8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? It depends on what it is.

9. What word do you often use to describe something great or wonderful? Amazing. I think it’s the only word I use. I should expand my “something great” vocabulary.

10. What is your favorite song currently? Love Somebody by Maroon 5. It’s been my favorite since it came out and it still is.

11. What is your favorite word? Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

12. What is the last song you listened to? Otherside by Red Hot Chili Peppers.

13. What TV show would you recommend everyone to watch? White Collar I guess.

14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? I tend to listen to music when I’m feeling down. But Rush Hour. Or Shrek.

15. Do you play video games? Nope, not at all... Such a silly question.

16. What is your biggest fear? I have a lot of fears. I have anxiety, so it comes with the territory. But I guess it would be being shut out from everyone and being alone.

17. What is your best quality in your opinion? I’m a very accepting person.

18. What is your worst quality in your opinion? Oof. Well...

19. Do you like cats or dogs better? Dogs. I’ve always loved dogs. Cats are great too though.

20. What is your favorite season? Autumn. The colors, the cute clothes, the ability to hide under three blankets.

21. Are you in a relationship? Yep. For a year and a half now.

22. What is something you miss from your childhood? Insouciance.

23. Who is your best friend? Rori, my six month old puppy.

24. What is your eye color? Blue.

25. What is your hair color? Dark, dark brown.

26. Who is someone you love? Family, friends, animals. So many.

27. Who is someone you trust? Trust is a hard thing for me. So only those very close to me.

28. Who is someone you think about often? My boyfriend.

29. Are you currently excited about something? I dunno. Am I?

30. What is your biggest obsession? Anything made by Apple. It’s such a beautiful company.

31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? When I was two, Dora. I would sit and watch it, purposely giving the wrong answers to her questions. When I got asked why, my answer was “she’s just going to do the right thing anyway.”

32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to? My boyfriend.

33. Are you superstitious? Kinda sometimes.

34. Do you have an unusual phobias? I have a fear of ladders. Not heights, ladders.

35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Definitely behind.

36. What is your favorite hobby? Video games is the only constant one, all my other hobbies constantly change.

37. What is the last book you read? It was online and I can’t remember the name to be honest.

38. What was the last movie you watched? Aquaman.

39. What musical instruments do you play? I played the clarinet when I was younger. Then I played the guitar. Now I’m trying to teach myself to play piano. I’ve always loved the piano.

40. What is your favorite animal? All of them. But lions and tigers are gorgeous animals.

41. What are your top five favorite Tumblr blogs? You think I can narrow it down to five?

42. What super power do you wish you had? Teleportation.

43. When and where do you feel most at peace? When my dog is cuddling with me.

44. What makes you smile? When my puppy is playing.

45. What sports do you play? I played softball when I was younger.

46. What is your favorite drink? I don’t know. Shirley Temples. Ginger Ale with Lemonade is really good too.

47. When was the last time you wrote a handwritten letter or note to someone? I can’t remember. So a while ago.

48. Are you afraid of heights? No.

49. What is your biggest pet peeve? I have a lot. But my biggest I think would be people who walk in front of you so slowly that you trip over your own feet.

50. Have you ever been to a concert? Yep. Maroon 5 was the last one. I hope to go to more too.

51. Are you vegetarian or vegan? No.

52. When you were little what did you want to be when you grew up? A veterinarian.

53. What fictional world would you like to live in? The world from Avatar. That’d be cool.

54. What is something you worry about? Anything and everything.

55. Are you scared of the dark? Depends on my mood.

56. Do you like to sing? Yes, I just wish I could say I was good at it.

57. Have you ever skipped school? No.

58. What is your favorite place on the planet? My bed.

59. Where would you like to live? Not where I’m living now. I’m so over this town. It’s pretty clean and safe though, so I appreciate that aspect of it.

60. Do you have any pets? Two cats and a puppy. Oh, and five chickens.

61. Are you an early bird or a night owl? Night owl. I want to be an early bird, but I’m naturally more awake at night.

62. Do you like sunrise or sunsets better? Sunsets because you can see the stars after! <3

63. Do you know how to drive? I do.

64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? Earbuds. Although headphones sound better.

65. Have you ever had braces? Yes.

66. What is your favorite genre of music? I tend to like specific songs instead of genres. But I really like 90′s music.

67. Who is your hero? I have no idea.

68. Do you read comic books? No.

69. What makes you the most angry? So many things. I’m a little hotheaded. But mainly when people are illogical.

70. Do you prefer to read real books or on an electric device? Real books!

71. What is your favorite subject in school? It was always math.

72. Do you have any siblings? Two. A brother and a sister.

73. What was the last thing you bought? Coffee...

74. How tall are you? 5′ 5″

75. Can you cook? Psh. Not really. But I’m trying to learn.

76. What are three things that you love? Playing games, watching movies with my boyfriend, and training my dog.

77. What are three things that you hate? It changes daily.

78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? Female.

79. What is your sexual orientation? Bisexual.

80. Where do you currently live? Neverland.

81. Who was the last person you texted? My boyfriend.

82. When was the last time you cried? I think it was a week ago.

83. Who is your favorite youtuber? I haven’t had the time to watch YouTube lately. So I don’t know.

84. Do you like to take selfies? Not in the slightest. The closest thing I’ll do to taking a selfie is make an edit of my simself.

85. What is your favorite app? Netflix.

86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? I’ve always been close with my parents. I’ve always been really close with my siblings too.

87. What is your favorite foreign accent? British.

88. What is a place that you’ve never been to but want to visit? All of Europe. But specifically Paris.

89. What is your favorite number? Five. Always has been.

90. Can you juggle? For three seconds.

91. Are you religious? I am.

92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? They’re both so interesting though! Outer space is so pretty and very interesting. But we know absolutely nothing about our oceans. It does peak my curiosity.

93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? Every once in a while.

94. Are you allergic to anything? Pollen. Grass. Dust. Spring is like death.

95. Can you curl your tongue? No, and everyone else I know can and they all tease me about it. Meanies.

96. Can you wiggle your ears? No... I can’t do anything cool OK?

97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? When it’s clear that I’m wrong, then I’ll admit it.

98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? I love them both. Oooh! A forest near the beach so I can be by the trees but still hear the ocean.

99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? "Breathe.”

100. Are you a good liar? I am an awful liar. Like awful awful. I don’t lie, but sometimes I’ll do white lies playfully with my boyfriend and he’ll just laugh because I’m so bad at it.

101. What is your Hogwarts house? Hufflepuff.

102. Do you talk to yourself? I used to. Now I just talk to my dog.

103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? An introvert who loves talking and meeting new people. But at the end of the day, I have to be alone to refill my energy.

104. Do you keep a journal or a diary? Nope.

105. Do you believe in second chances? I guess it technically depends. But we’re all human and we all make mistakes. It’s unfair to not give more than one chance. Unless it’s PURPOSELY harming someone else. That’s not ok. No second chances with that.

106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? I would take it to the nearest business. Hopefully the person comes looking.

107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? With most things. If they really wanted to.

108. Are you ticklish? Yeah...

109. Have you ever been on a plane? I have.

110. Do you have any piercings? I have my standard lobe piercings. Then on my right ear I have a forward helix and upper lobe piercing. On my left I have a helix piercing. And my nose is pierced.

111. What fictional character do you wish was real? Donkey from Shrek.

112. Do you have any tattoos? Yes, just one.

113. What is the best decision that you have made so far? Rescuing my dog, she means the world to me.

114. Do you believe in karma? Yeah, I think so.

115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? I wore glasses when I was younger, but I don’t need to wear them anymore. My eyes magically improved, I don’t know.

116. Do you want children? I’ve always wanted two.

117. Who is the smartest person you know? I know a lot of smart people.

118. What is your most embarrassing memory? This one time...

119. Have you ever pulled an all nighter? Probably too often. Then I got my puppy, and I haven’t since. Puppies are exhausting.

120. What color are most of your clothes? Maroon. Or blue. I have a lot of grey I think too.

121. Do you like adventures? Yes! “ADVENTURE IS OUT THERE!”

122. Have you ever been on TV? Nope.

123. How old are you? 19.

124. What is your favorite quote? I have so many favorites, but... "You’re only given a little spark of madness, you mustn’t lose it.” - Robin Williams.

125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? Savory. But sweet is sometimes welcome too.

I tag: anyone who wants to... since this is forever late

#nonsims #tag game #get to know me #personal #i.sil

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kvotheunkvothe · 6 years

Text

What the Fuck Am I Reading: The Tenant of Wildfell Hall

So this is the first and only book I’ve read by Anne Brontë. I’ve read Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre and had heard Anne’s books aren’t very good. Well, I’m happy to report that whoever told me that is a goddamn liar. I’d rank this at least on the same tier as Jane Eyre (my previous Brontë favorite), if not higher. Not only is it well-written, but hot damn is it raw. The basic premise is about a lady with a young son who previously had an absolutely terrible marriage learning to love and trust again. And Anne does not shy away from describing just how shitty her husband was. In some ways I think I’m glad I came across this book somewhat later, so I have more life experience just to appreciate this book. But on the other hand, I can’t believe I slept on it for so long. I have a lot to say about this, so buckle up.

Let’s start with Gilbert Markham, the new love interest whose POV bookends the narrative. He’s the one who introduces the reader to the titular tenant, the widow Mrs. Helen Graham. Gilbert is a bit excitable, but he has a good heart. He’s hardworking and honest and he refuses to listen to idle rumors. He starts off a little offput about the new tenant of Wildfell Hall because she’s pretty forthright and standoffish, but eventually he’s head over heels for her. And it’s pretty adorable how he tries so desperately to get to know her. He’s sweet with her kid, he’s interested in her paintings, and he’s basically always trying to find ways to spend time with her. As I said, however, he’s a bit excitable: after shooting down all kinds of people idle gossiping that it’s suspicious that the widow’s young son looks a bit like her landlord (Lawrence), he also kind of knocks Lawrence off of his horse. Finally, Mrs. Graham tells him she just can’t be with him, and she gives him her diary to explain why.

And oh boy does it explain things. So her prior husband was just... the biggest shit. He was a heel. A cad. An absolute self-centered fuckboy. She had known he didn’t run with a good crowd before marriage, but she was hopeful she could be a good influence. But this asshole and his shitty friends just appear to delight in vice. He goes off for months at a time--which eventually becomes something of a mercy--just living it up with his bachelor friends, and then he finally comes home sick as a dog for her to nurse back to health. He’s not really physically abusive: he beats his dogs and once threw a book at the dog that also hit Helen (which pleased him), but mostly it’s emotional, verbal, and economic abuse. He actually calls her a slut at one point. I couldn’t fucking believe my eyes--this book was written in the mid-1800s, and this is a good Christian woman being called a slut by her own husband, in her own home, because he didn’t like being told to stop drinking like a fish. Like, I don’t doubt people were just as shitty back then, but I’ve never read a book from the time that is so explicit about it. He ends up having an affair, and when she literally catches him in the act (IN THEIR OWN HOME), he just acts petulant and just whines that she wants to separate (he refuses, and is pissy she’s like “well, we’re going to live as strangers in this house, then”). The husband’s little side-piece emotionally blackmails her into not telling the other wronged spouse (who is a good dude), because the truth would devastate him. The husband’s “friends” are also all pieces of shit. They all get together, pour liquor down the young son’s throat, and teach him to disrespect his mother. Another of her husband’s “friends” keeps trying to get under her skirts, no matter how many times she rebuffs him, reasoning that he can “save” her from her marriage and that since her husband’s cheating on her, she might as well. One time he physically won’t let her go, and when all the other men convene on the scene, her husband starts calling her vile names and insinuating that she’s the adulterer in their relationship. She has to rely on the shitty “friend” to admit she’s never given in to his advances. At a certain point, Helen feels like she’s just fucking had enough, and she starts painting like crazy to sell off enough that she can make an escape with her boy. Of course her husband finds out, steals all her money, and basically laughs at her. God he made my blood boil. I wish every fucker who claims to want to go back to the “good old days” when women were financially dependent on their husbands, didn’t divorce, and lived “good Christian lives” could read this book and see just how fucking few resources women used to have when they were trapped with monsters.

Spoilers for the rest of the book because I want to talk in some detail: So, essentially, the husband wasn’t actually dead this whole time. Surprise, surprise. The breaking point came when the shitlord hired a “governess” to look after the kid, over Helen’s objections. When she finally had proof she was there to be the husband’s mistress, Helen has just had it. She escapes with her little boy and takes refuge with her brother, Lawrence (which is why her little boy looks a little like him and why they had such a close relationship that created all that gossip). Shortly after Helen gives Gilbert her diary, she makes him promise not to see her again so as not to tempt her to break her vows. However, he is allowed to write to her in another 6 months. He’s devastated, but agrees. Then she leaves suddenly because her shitty husband has taken extremely ill. Gilbert reads about her nursing the shithead husband through letters she sends to Lawrence. Eventually, luckily, he does actually die. Gilbert’s in something of a bind, though: he doesn’t want to write to her immediately, both because the six months aren’t quite up and because he doesn’t want to be a vulture. But then she goes back to live with her aunt, and he doesn’t have the address and is too nervous to ask her brother for it (recall he kind of knocked Lawrence off his horse, and he gets the impression Lawrence wouldn’t really favor the match--also, okay,this is hilarious: at one point when he’s at Lawrence’s sickbed pining after Helen he’s like, “Lawrence’s slender white fingers are so much like hers!”--like, omg, Gilbert, no, it’s no wonder Lawrence isn’t your biggest fan). Because Helen doesn’t write to him, he kind of assumes she’s uninterested. But when he hears gossip she might be getting married to the shitty “friend” who kept harassing her when she was married, he pretty much drops everything to rush over and basically do a church-house confession of love. Luckily, it wasn’t actually her getting married. But he’s kind of like, “well, hell, I might as well track her down, then.” So after checking at her late husband’s house--learning both her aunt’s address and that she inherited her husband’s whole estate--he sets off to find her. When he’s nearly to his destination, the other passengers tell him, “oh, by the way, all these lands we’re passing through belong to some widow lady, whose uncle also died.” By the time he gets to her aunt’s house--now technically Helen’s house by her uncle’s will--he’s like “oh no wonder she didn’t write, she is SO out of my league and rich, now, I’d just be a bother” and he almost turns right back around, except he’s spotted and invited in. Their reunion is kind of adorable. Like, she ends up plucking this winter rose and saying, “it’s a little battered by the elements, but you can have it,” and he’s kind of hesitating when trying to think of the best thing to say. So she throws it out the window, like “okay, fine, but just so you know, that was kind of a metaphor for my life,” and he’s like, “NO, I UNDERSTOOD THAT, WAIT” and literally jumps out the window after it. So they work things out, and set a date, and Gilbert of course loves her little boy like he was his own, and I guess they live happily ever after. Spoilers end.

So, why was this such a good book? Well, of course it was well-written, but I think also it’s mostly because it was so unflinching. It was an emotional journey, reading about Helen’s life ambitions being slowly ground down, only to find some hope afterwards. It’s a bit preachy at times, since Helen basically only had her religion to sustain her over a number of traumatic years. But it’s also got some fairly progressive ideas about gender equality and the dangers of letting men have so much control over their wives and children. Gilbert’s chapters provided some much-needed levity to a fairly serious topic. Helen’s quite level-headed, so it was amusing as hell when you get to Gilbert and he’s throwing himself over hedges and bounding over hills and taking off on wild carriage rides. He also tells people off when they’re just being gossips and busybodies. His first impression of Helen is that he thinks she thinks he’s like an impudent puppy--and like, is she wrong?

Ultimately, I loved this book. If you have the time, I highly recommend it.

#what the fuck am I reading #the tenant of wildfell hall #anne bronte #book review

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empress-of-snark · 6 years

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(last header by @caseyblu)

AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR (2018)

(I am a Fool and I didn’t post this yesterday, I apologize)

AKA: I wish I hadn’t already used the “Everything hurts and I’m dying” reference on Iron Man 2, because it’s even more applicable now.

(So many spoilers, like seriously, don’t read if you haven’t seen Infinity War yet.)

Hoo boy, wow. This was the big one. It’s kind of like Civil War--there’s just so much going on that it’s hard to know where to start. Only it’s like 100 times bigger than that. So yeah, this might get confusing. Sorry in advance.

First off, I’m not totally convinced that Loki’s dead. I know, I know, I’m not gonna go off on a rant and it’s not just because I like him. It’s because his death really didn’t make sense. I mean, I understand why it had to happen plot-wise, but I don’t understand why someone as powerful as Loki would simply use a knife to attack Thanos, who now has two infinity stones. One could argue he wasn’t thinking clearly after seeing Thor tortured, but that doesn’t seem in-character to me. I dunno, maybe I’m just in denial. But I have a hunch he may come back one last time in Avengers 4, maybe with Valkyrie.

There were a lot of characters absent who I expect will make an appearance in Avengers 4, assuming they weren’t dusted. Hawkeye, Ant-Man & the Wasp, Valkyrie, Korg & Meik, Lady Sif, Wong (if he’s done protecting the Sanctorum, that is).

Actually, I’m calling it right now. End credits scene of Avengers 4. Dr. Strange opens the doors to the Sanctum Sanctorum, bloody, bruised, and exhausted after the fight of his life. Wong is sitting on the stairs with a half-eaten carton of Ben & Jerry’s “Hulk-A-Hulk-A-Burning-Fudge” ice cream. “How’d it go?”

Also excited to meet Captain Marvel and learn what exactly she’s been doing for the past ten years that was more important than ever helping save the world. Maybe she’s just so powerful that no threat has been big enough to require her presence? I guess we’ll find out next year.

Anyway, it was great seeing all the different characters meet and interact for the first time. It’s another big crossover, like the first Avengers movie. Except this one is like three or four big groups scattered across the galaxy and you have to keep track of who knows who and who’s where doing what. It gets confusing at times, especially trying to remember things like who’s supposed to know about the infinity stones, who knows about Thanos, who has no idea what’s going on, etc.

I spotted another timeline issue that confuses things even more, actually. Tony references the events of the first Avengers film and says they happened six years ago. Which means that technically Spiderman Homecoming is supposed to happen two years after this (as the beginning indicates it’s eight years after the attack on New York). I guess it doesn’t make a huge difference, I’m just surprised they’d make a mistake like that, with how meticulous they usually are about continuity.

It was still pretty painful to watch all those characters turn to dust at the end, even though I know they’re definitely coming back in Avengers 4 (they literally just announced the release date of Spiderman 2). Ugh, his scene still gets me. Knowing that his lines there were improvised honestly makes it worse.

This is obviously the first time we’ve ever seen a villain actually win, even if it’s just part one. And before anyone says anything else about Quill ruining the plan and being responsible for their loss, consider this: Strange saw this future. He knew there was only one way they could defeat Thanos and if he didn’t stop Quill then, that means it had to happen. If Quill had stayed quiet and they’d gotten the gauntlet off, something else would’ve gone wrong and Thanos still would’ve killed half the universe.

Also, consider that Quill has always been a very emotional character. He had the same reaction to Gamora’s death that he did in Guardians 2 when he learned that Ego killed his mother. He was not acting rationally and we shouldn’t condemn him for being sad/angry that the woman he loves is dead.

It is a little unhelpful that Strange dissolved before leaving any sort of instructions. He’s the only one who knows exactly what should happen and now he’s gone, leaving everyone else to figure it out on their own.

One complaint that my brother pointed out is that this movie kind of negates a lot of what happened in Ragnarok. Yes, Asgard is still gone, but the point of Ragnarok was to strip Thor down to nothing. He lost his hammer. In Infinity War, he’s got a new axe. He lost an eye. Rocket gives him a new one. He and Loki finally reconciled. Loki’s dead now. He befriended Valkyrie. Who even knows where Valkyrie is. Also half the Asgardian refugees are dead now. It just makes you wonder what the point of Ragnarok was if nothing stuck.

So let’s talk about Gamora real quick. First of all, her singing along with Quill to his music was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Second of all, I’m not convinced she’s dead either (yes, like Loki, this is partly just because I don’t want her to be dead). There’s theories that she may be trapped in the soul stone, possibly along with everyone who got dusted, which means that there may be a chance of getting her back in Avengers 4. I really hope so, cause I just can’t imagine another Guardians movie without her.

There’s probably a million and one other things left to say but I don’t want this review to drag on too long. You all saw the movie, you know how devastating it is, I don’t have to tell you.

RANKINGS: Disclaimer: We’re considering the characters who went through the most change/development as ‘heroes’ and everyone else as ‘supporting.’ I’d love to sit down and rank every single character in this movie, but we’d be here all day.

Hero(es): 8.5 Stormbreakers out of 10. This is Tony, Dr. Strange, Peter Quill, Gamora, Vision, Wanda, and Thor. All seven of these characters went through a ton of character development and growth, and come across as the real main characters. They all played off each other well (those that interacted, that is), and every one of them had to make some incredibly hard decisions that really reflected their heroism.

Villain: 9.5 snaps out of 10. I mean, a villain always gets points when he’s easy to hate, and Thanos makes it soooo easy, omg. Like some others, his motivations actually make sense in a really twisted way and he’s not just trying to take over the world, which gets old. Plus, he actually succeeded in his goal! Can’t wait to see him get beaten to death in Avengers 4, fingers crossed.

Supporting characters: 8 tuna melts out of 10. This is everyone but the seven mentioned above. Lots of the supporting characters provide a little comic relief in the more stressful moments. Just about every character plays some important role in the story and they all manage to work together to defeat Thanos. Female characters: 7.5 Bechdels out of 10. This one kind of passes for a very brief interaction between Wanda, Natasha, and Proxima Midnight (Thanos’s evil daughter) on the battlefield in Wakanda. But we’ve established in the past that a movie can still be feminist whether or not it passes the Bechdel test. And this one still gets points for having multiple female characters who play crucial roles in the plot. Wanda and Gamora especially, as previously stated, are central characters. In fact, I think I read somewhere that Gamora actually gets the most screen time out of all the heroes, at something like 19 minutes.

Action scenes: 10 punches out of 10. Nearly every MCU hero from the past ten years has to band together to fight Thanos and we get to see the full extent of everyone’s abilities. I especially love watching Dr. Strange and Wanda’s fighting techniques. Plus, the movie does a great job at balancing all the action by cutting back and forth between the different locations and giving us some reprieve from non-stop fighting.

Stan Lee: 4 cameos out of 10. As Peter’s field trip bus driver, he delivers one of his best cameo lines: “What’s the matter, kids? You never seen a spaceship before?”

Charisma: 8.5 points out of 10. This movie has some great themes of love and sacrifice. Multiple times one of the characters is forced to choose between a stone and a loved one (Thor and Loki, Gamora and Nebula, Wanda and Vision, etc.), and nearly every time, they choose their loved one. Thanos believes in sacrifice for the greater good, which is why he was willing to kill Gamora for the soul stone, but the heroes do not. Wanda is the only one who ends up sacrificing the one she loves (Vision) in order to destroy the mind stone, but she only does so under extreme duress and after exhausting every other option first. The running themes are very consistent, though I can’t say you leave the movie feeling good about anything, lol.

In total: 56 out of 65, so an 86%, which is actually higher than its Rotten Tomatoes score of 84%.

And that officially concludes the Great Marvel Rewatch of 2k18!! Thanks for following along, those of you who did! It’s been a fun, emotional, two weeks. Stay tuned for later, follow-up posts featuring a complete rankings list and possibly some other bonus materials! :)

#marvel #avengers: infinity war #great marvel rewatch of 2k18

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nintendobiitch · 6 years

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ALL THE 80’S MOVIE ASKS DO EM ALL

OMG BABE TSYM

And @adora-milaje thank you for asking toooo my bud I’ll just put all the answers here :)

Bill and ted’s excellent adventure: Are you more of an optimist or pessimist?

More of an optimist I think! Like, I’m not wholly irrational, I don’t completely inflate my expectations, but I also can’t help looking forward to stuff or just hoping that it goes well. I find the idea of constantly expecting the worst just super depressing. Like yeah you’re technically “never disappointed” but you also don’t get the excitement of anticipation? I dunno.

Back to the future: Which decade in the last century would you most have liked to live in?

I mean tbh as far as basic civil rights go the 20th Century was largely a catastrophe but purely for fashion/film/music purposes I would rock the 1980s.

The breakfast club: Which high school stereotype do you fit into best?

UMMM I have no idea tbh. Like, nerd but a nerd who’s bad at maths? Idk.

Ferris bueller’s day off: What’s your guilty pleasure?

There’s this one coffee shop that I practically live in, like well enough that I know the owner now, and it’s not exactly a “guilty” pleasure but I’ve definitely spent far more money there than I should have haha

Footloose: Who did you last dance with?

When I went clubbing with a bunch of friends to celebrate the end of exams! So my future housemate Becky and a bunch of my other close friends :)

The goonies: What was the last thing to make you laugh?

Just 20 minutes ago I was laughing at my friend James while we played Portal 2 co-op. He died. He died so much.

The outsiders: Why is your best friend your best friend?

OH MAN this is so hard cause like, there are multiple people I’d consider my best friends. My friend Lizzie I’ve known since I was two, she’s so easy to talk to, she cheers me up no matter what, I just feel completely comfortable in her company. My friend Nat I met this year at uni and we have so many similar interests, she’s one of the coolest, funniest people I’ve ever met and we just clicked super quickly. My friend Lucia has been with me through so much difficult shit, she cares so much for me and it’s so lovely. My friend Cosi I can go without seeing for a year and then feel like no time has passed when we next speak.

The lost boys: Would you rather be immortal or objectively beautiful to everyone?

Objectively beautiful??? I’m vain as hell and I think immortality is more of a curse than a blessing tbh

Labyrinth: What’s the relationship with your siblings like?

Great! I love my little brother so much. He’s a dumbass but he’s my dumbass, and really surprisingly respectful for a 14 year old boy. He’s my person to yell about nintendo stuff to, it’s awesome.

The karate kid: When did you last have to work really hard to achieve something you’re proud of?

One of the things I’m most proud of recently is getting my Camp America placement! I had to do three interviews and fill out a huge application, and it’s for a job that is literally a dream come true for me, so I’m super happy I got it! Only two weeks until I head out to New Hampshire now!!

Stand by me: Why did you last go on a road trip?

I really haven’t been on that many road trips tbh. You can drive the length of England in like less than a day. I guess technically the last thing was when I drove back up to uni after the Easter holidays haha

Pretty in pink: What’s your signature ‘look’?

I Do Not Have One hahaha. I swap between styles pretty much constantly. I have an insane number of button up shirts so I’m either high-key flannel lesbian or quite feminine skirt/dress type clothes, totally depends on my mood. I guess the most “signature” thing I own is my dungarees? I wear them a looooot.

Drugstore cowboy: Which historical figure most spikes your interest?

Bruh I’m a history student this is a dangerous question hahaha. Big fan of ALL the Russian tsars, especially Catherine the Great, and Nicholas I. Also love a bit of Otto von Bismarck. Charles II was a mad lad and I love him for it. James I was gay as shit and I respect that. And who doesn’t love Louis XIV? The Viking leader Guthrum was pretty snazzy too y’know I respect him. I really could keep going hahaha.

Ghostbusters: Where were you when you watched your favourite movie for the first time?

Bold of you to assume I have just one favourite movie lol. The one that comes to mind though is when I first watched Inception at my friend Lizzie’s house! Fuckin love that movie so much.

Sixteen candles: At which age do you consider a person to be mature?

Totally depends on the person, and also what you mean by mature. Like anywhere from sort of 15-18 you can start talking to someone like an adult, people start forming more personal/informed opinions about the world, making decisions about their future, but they’re also still children in so many ways. I was dumb as shit at 15 but I also really wasn’t a baby anymore either. It’s a weird age period.

Dirty dancing: Where were you when you first heard your favourite song?

OOOH again, favourite song SINGULAR? One of the songs I treasure the most (Disloyal Order/FOB) I was in the kitchen doing my art coursework, this huge intricate batik thing, and it was the first time I listened to folie a deux and I totally lost focus on my art, I just sat there drinking in this song, every word felt so perfect, ugh I love it

Better off dead: Why did you last laugh so hard it reduced you to tears?

SO I was drunk off my ass, a group of us had gone for cocktails, and my friend Nat showed me that meme of pitbull stretched really big that’s just captured “mr wide” and I lost my SHIT, literally laughed for ten straight minutes, tears streaming down my face, it was the purest joy I’ve ever felt haha

Heathers: Did you apologise the last time you were unreasonably mean?

Yes? I think so. Hard to pinpoint the last time I was mean to someone for no reason, but I tend to feel guilty very quickly and I already say sorry every third word so...

Parenthood: Is there anyone you’re not biologically related to that you consider ‘family’?

I’ve name dropped her a lot already but my friend Lizzie is basically my sister haha. My friend Freya has been calling herself my sister for six years and she pretty much is by now too.

Permanent record: Where were you the last time you told someone you loved them?

I was in right here in bed, texting my girlfriend Maya haha. I guess the last time I said it to someone’s face was last Saturday before she left to go back home, and that was outside her block.

St. Elmo’s fire: What’s one piece advice you would give to someone two years younger than yourself?

A) You are not a grown-up yet, please go easy on yourself you still have so so much growing to do! B) You don’t have to know your passion yet, you don’t have to figure out your whole life at sixteen. There are a lot of things you don’t have control over right now and that’s frustrating and shitty but believe me it gets so much better. Hang in there.

Dangerous liaisons: Which language would you most like to learn?

French or Greek! French because I studied for-fucking-ever but I never got close to fluent (admittedly because I’m impatient as hell haha) and Greek because it’s the language my dad speaks and I wish he’d taught me when I was younger!

Rumble fish: Who do you look to for guidance in times of need?

My mum! I’ve always been able to go to her for help and advice which has been really great, although certainly more recently there’ve been times I’ve rather asked my close friends for comfort too.

E.T.: What’s one ‘weird’ feature that you love about yourself?

Nothing particularly quirky or different about me. My eyes are different colours which I’ve always thought was pretty cool!

Young guns: What’s one style that you love on others, but would never try yourself?

Literally EVERYTHING my girlfriend wears oh my god she is a fashion queen and I’m so shook every time I see her. She fucking rocks fishnet tights and idk if I’m feeling that look for myself but she looks AMAZING.

Oxford blues: Why did you last pretend to be something you’re not?

I guess the last time I was really pretending to be someone was before I came out to my parents. It never felt like a big deal until I came to uni and actually had the chance to express myself and feel comfortable doing it, then it felt like I was constantly lying to them.

Dead poet’s society: The last time you made a decision that everyone around you told you not to make, how did it work out?

Surprisingly, I’ve not done anything stupid enough recently for people to all tell me it’s a bad idea? Huh.

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lytahalifax · 7 years

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XI Questions Tag

(I don’t know why I did that in Roman numerals, I’m obviously in a weird mood :)

I was tagged by @byjillianmaria for this. Rules: always post the rules, answer the questions given to you, write 11 questions of your own, tag 11 people. I don’t think I really know 11 people here, or can come up with 11 questions, so I promise NOTHING with regards to following rules. Because I am an iconoclast*, baby! (makes air guitar gestures and noises) *iconoclast (n) = a fancy way to say “lazy”.

Questions:

1.) What’s a line of dialogue that you’re most proud of? Holy cripes, that’s kind of a tough one to answer, having written a bunch, and forgotten even more, in the past four years. I would say it’s easier for me to talk about chapters of things I’m proud of, and in that, I’m particularly proud of a chapter I wrote in my Mass Effect series “Once More Unto The Breach” called “We Who Are About Die”. It’s essentially about the people who initially designed and floated the specs for The Catalyst, and how they came together as one race and expended all their efforts, not in self-preservation, but in giving the galaxy a fighting chance against the Reapers. They knew it might take millions and millions of years for their goal to be achieved, if ever, but they were committed, almost as one, to the notion, choosing to die not screaming and in fear, but as an almost indomitable force that would not be denied, no matter how long it too for their plan to bear fruit. However, there was a line my editor particularly adored that spun off from that whole thread, about “the weight of a billions years of justice, no longer denied”. My Shepard also had some really nice comedic bits throughout that whole series. OMUTB, as my first real “child”, is the series I made absolutely the most mistakes with, but also am the proudest of to this day. “Near Wild Heaven” from “Black Swan” is another personal favorite, a chapter I was having so much fun writing, I had to force myself to stop.

2.) Which of your characters would you most like to hang out with? Camilla Davies from Black Swan. I suspect she would understand me and my life experiences the best out of anyone on the planet, would be able to give me savagely effective life advice, and possibly transfer my brain into a cloned female body. In fact, I think I’d probably really enjoy hanging out with her, Reese and Alanna; I always felt they were kind of the Three Musketteers of SOAP. Bledoc Caitor, a one off OC I wrote for Once More Unto The Breach as a shoutout to a longtime reader, would be a distant second because he would probably make me the galaxy’s best bowl of ramen, and I really, really love ramen. 3.) Do you have any goals for the rest of 2017? Survive the oncoming storm of massive life and career changes coming up in the final quarter of 2017, and essentially prepare for some major life retooling I hope to achieve in 2018. Unfortunately, this probably means taking a sabbatical or otherwise semi-retiring from writing, at least for a while.

4.) What season inspires you the most? It’s a toss up between Spring and Autumn. Probably Spring; March/April is usually about the time I come out of my winter doldrums and do a lot of my writing again. 5.) If you could rewrite one part of an already-published work, what would it be? The first 20 chapters of Once More Unto the Breach. Well..maybe not ALL of them, but holy crap, there are some massive technical errors and embarrassing gaffs and continuity glitches I made there. I very nearly gave up on the entire endeavor were it not for the fact that I started working with a real top notch editor who essentially trained me how to be a better ,more effective writer, and it’s clear the final 20 chapters are SO much better as a result. I might also redo “To Bask In Your Starshine”. But maybe not. 6.) Do any of your characters have pets? What kind? Shepard kept coming back to the Normandy, even when she didn’t command it anymore, to collect Space Hamsters from the lower decks. Her oldest daughter has a pet kakliosaur. I imagine Camilla has a couple of cats, because they were the only animals she could really relate to: one of them is a tortie Maine Coon, which she adopted because she liked the coloration, not realizing how diva-esque torties are in their behavior. Reese probably has a fancy tropical fish tank setup he poured way too much time and money into. Nicole has a dog, like a golden retriever or a bulldog or something. A mutt for sure.

7.) What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re feeling uninspired? This is the answer - or at least part of it - that will make people gasp in shock and go, “Lyta! You can’t say things like that!” I have two techniques: one I would recommend, and one I would not. It should be obvious which is which. First, I smoke weed. Not often, not all the time, I’m actually on a bit of a six month break from it. I don’t smoke specifically going in to look for inspiration, I just do it to relax, but I would be lying if I said there weren’t times when inspiration didn’t come and come HARD when I was stoned. At least two of my stories, Old Soul and How Can I Sleep?, are the result of me breaking through serious blocks after toking up. Seriously, I could not figure out how to do Old Soul and almost gave up until I got baked and started watching old 1970s tv commercials, and then it came to me. I’m pretty damn sure that good chunks of the final three chapters of Black Swan came to me while I was toked up as well. Second, and much more often, I go for a lot of walks. Like a lot a lot of walks. I try to walk about 12,000 steps a day at a minimum now, which is probably why I’ve lost 20 pounds since April. But for years, I’ve done this when I can, because I find it can get me into a good “zen headspace”, almost like a walking meditation, where ideas flow easier from out of the great miasma of notions inside my brain. Large chunks of Black Swan chapters 5 through 12 were “flashes of inspiration” that came to me when I got “into the zone” during walking, and made sure to write quick emails to myself on my cell phone, so I wouldn’t forget. I’m pretty sure the same goes for Grande Dame, and definitely so for Bearing Witness to Time. If it weren’t for my walks, I wouldn’t have most of my writing ideas. Indeed, it’s gotten so that if I go down a path I haven’t traveled in a long time, my brain starts to play back memories of writing a particular story, as if the brainstorming somehow became encoded in the local metalayer of that location, and walking through it is like replaying a tape in my mind.

8.) Do you have a go-to writing snack/drink? Beef jerky. Usually of the spicy variety It’s high in protein, tasty, and a provides a viscerally satisfying experience in the eating of. Grrr! Chomp! Chew chew chew.

There is an awesome jerky shop at Container Park in Las Vegas that I love to stock up at whenever I’m there...unfortunately my supply never lasts. I should probably find out if they do mail order.

9.) Do you have any self-indulgent stories/characters that you’d never publish (or even write down)? Hah! Oh boy.....yeeeeeah. There was this one crack fic I came up with called “The Yurizoku Formula, or GAYBIES!” It was a weird story, in the vein of “Chloe Price’s Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny (which I recently took down for personal reasons) or “Today’s Fish is Trout ala Creme” from OMUTB. If I remember correctly, the long and short of it is Warren accidentally infecting Brooke with a virus that makes her incredibly irresistible to all the women on campus, and she has to deal with their unwanted affections as she tries to get through her day, growing increasingly exasperated and flustered, sorta in the vein of Miyuki-chan in Wonderland. I remember it being much funnier and more clever back then than it obviously is. Sometimes I get ideas and my own personal kinks bleed through a little too much...as an example, the end of “The Domina Effect” in Black Swan was originally written to be a faiiiir bit more “sexy” between Rachel and Victoria, but NQW correctly convinced me to drop it. (As an example of my “kinks”, my first complete work ever written was a lesbian erotica sci-fi mind control story which I called Love is the Drug, which sadly I lost the files to before I could submit it to an appropriate archive. There are actually strong echos of this story in A Power Greater Than My Own...the bit where Victoria, as the domme, finds herself feeling helpless in the face of her so-called submissive at the end, because of how hard she’s fallen in love with her. I) I was also thinking about writing an AU fic in the ME universe called Domination: A Love Story, where the Asari are much more in the mold of Frank Herbert’s “Honored Matres” from the later Dune novels, and a 19 year old Shepard is helpless to watch as her colony ship is essentially taken over by an Asari “diplomatic expedition” who are slowly but inexorably brainwashing everyone over to their way of thinking. Not every Asari agrees with this method of behavior however, prompting a young(er) Liara T’Soni to try and help Shepard get through the horror of that particular situation; in the end, she’s forced to temporarily brainwash Shepard, in order to keep up appearances around the Asari Inquisitors, but eventually “releases” Shepard, so the two of them can run off and join a resistance cell. Huh...I might actually come back to that one someday... Usually, when I get ideas that are terribly self-indulgent, they tend to not hang around, and then get swept out by whatever part of my brain reclaims needed storage space for better things. I’m sure there are whole stories that I’ve completely forgotten about. 10.) What works inspire you to be a better writer? Oh gleesh. Believe it or not, one of the reasons I tend to avoid reading other peoples work in general, with some exceptions, is that I find it very intimidating and daunting. Like “OMG! This person is so good, how could you even think that you are on the same level with them, you absolute hack? What could you possibly have to offer up to the great Singularity of Human Artistic Expression that someone hasn’t already done, and done WAY WAY better than you? For instance, I’ve specifically avoided watching TransParent on Amazon, because I still have an idea for a TV show about a “transhumanist transwoman” which I call “Swing Out Sister”. I probably will never do it, but I’m afraid that if I watch Jeffrey Tambor’s no doubt AMAZING work, I will give it up forever and ever. That said, the things I am watching right now that just blow me away with their style and panache are Rick and Morty and especially BoJack Horseman; I’m most of the way through BoJack season 4 and holy holy holy shit. Obviously, I am a fan of dark, almost cynical takes on the nature of suffering and the human condition. 11.) Say something nice about your writing! (Not a question, don’t care). What?! No! You can’t make me, you’re not my supervisor! Oh, okay. I will say this: people tell me that I am really good at writing dialogue, and this is the only thing I have ever agreed with. I write good dialogue. Sometimes, I even write great dialogue. Once, I wrote superb dialogue - I suspect. Dialogue and snappy patter is my forte, along with weird, high level ideas that I can never properly fill the details in. I’m good at A to C plotting, but figuring out “B” is where I still need a lot of work. Okay, well, I enjoyed this a lot but I am going to be a Naughty Lyta, and not pass it forward. At least, not for now, but I reserve the right to pick it back up and move it forward at a later date.

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nanyoky · 7 years

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QUICKBIRD obviously but also do Wanda/Bucky AND Wanda/Vision please. for me. pretty please with a cherry and chocolate and sprinkles on top.

THIS IS WHY YOU ARE MY FAVORITE

Quickbird:

who’s the werewolf and who’s the hunter: Hunter!Sam and Werewolf!Pietro (I have a distinct image in my mind of anthony mackie as a wereworlf/vampire hunter in my head? did someone make a gifset at one point? That isn’t a real movie is it?)

who’s the mermaid and who’s the fisherman: Merman!Sam and Fisherman!Pietro

who’s the witch and who’s the familiar: Witch!Sam and Pietro is his cat familiar ala Thackary Binx in hocus pocus omg

who’s the barista and who’s the coffee addict: Sam needs his coffee at all hours, Pietro isn’t allowed at the register anymore, so he makes Wanda (better at faking politeness, so she’s always on the register) write flirty notes “From the kitchen” on Sam’s cup.

who’s the professor and who’s the TA: OMG ESSAY I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. Because they hooked up at the end of last semester and they’d never met but judging on uh- age... Sam sorta figured Pietro was a student at the university where he lectures but it wasn’t a problem cuz he isn’t technically his student and then couple weeks later at the start of the semester he’s assigned a new TA and OH FUCK. And like every day is just “can you stop writing on the board and gesturing so animatedly with your sleeves rolled up all these freshman can def tell I’m daydreaming and staring at your ass all day as is just CHILL” and “can you just NOT come in with sex hair every day and slump back in your seat and have a dumb little smile whenever I lose my thread because you caught my eye and EVERYONE KNOWS STOP THIS I’M GOING TO GET FIRED” and “*both at the same time* AND STOP DOING THAT WITH YOUR PEN THIS ORAL FIXATION IS OUT OF CONTROL” and the poor helpless freshmen like “please stop this we need to pass our government credit”

who’s the knight and who’s the prince(ss): since winter soldier, we know that Sam “41st floor! 41st!” Wilson is def the type to be all “YOU’RE RESCUING ME WRONG”

who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent: i don’t know of any baby falcons, so: Luna never stops talking about her kindergarten teacher and then it’s parent’s day and Pietro’s just really embarrassed he has a crush on the same guy as his six year old.

who’s the writer and who’s the editor: Pietro’s not so much a writer as a translator and they only know each other through snide bitchy email threads like “this passage isn’t actually how people speak” “well it’s what it SAYS in Magyar so deal with it.” “or you could just say this thing that makes more sense” “NEVER.”

Winterwitch:

who’s the werewolf and who’s the hunter: I’ve already written brief mention of werewolf!Bucky, so THAT. omg hunter!wanda. I need to design that outfit.

who’s the mermaid and who’s the fisherman: Mermaid Wanda is fucking deadly omg. Bucky def looks like he’s spent good time on a boat.

who’s the witch and who’s the familiar: Easy. Bucky is a wolf.

who’s the barista and who’s the coffee addict: this is the same au as above and lots of misunderstandings are had when Sam and Bucky come in at the same time and get the wrong drinks- ergo the messages from the wrong twin.

who’s the professor and who’s the TA: Wanda is a community ed. psych teacher and Bucky went directly into the service and never got the college experience so he’s just taking a few night classes and his therapist says getting involved more with students and staff as a community will help him reenter civilian life. But then they just stay up late together grading papers and then there’s wine and then sloppy makeouts on Wanda’s apartment floor and that’s not what his therapist meant but hey whatever works.

who’s the knight and who’s the prince(ss): Bucky has been locked away and brainwashed in the tower and Wanda has to storm the castle with her magic to free him. I also need magical knight!wanda outfit designs in my life.

who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent: Parent!Bucky and Teacher!Wanda

who’s the writer and who’s the editor: Bucky hates his job but this novel came across his desk and it’s dark and weird and fucking unflinchingly PRIMAL without indulging in trauma-porn or glorifying the violence of it and he’s GOT to meet this writer.

Scarletvision (OF COURSE, FOR YOU):

who’s the werewolf and who’s the hunter: I’m sorry I’m just stuck on hunter!wanda now regardless of who her monster boyfriend is.

who’s the mermaid and who’s the fisherman: Merman!Vision and fisherwoman!Wanda. Possibly same au as the quickbird one.

who’s the witch and who’s the familiar: Easy. Vision is a raven

who’s the barista and who’s the coffee addict: Wanda and Pietro shuffle into the all hours shop after their bar shifts and no matter what time it is the same guy is on the register? Like what the fuck does he ever sleep? So they’re on a mission to figure out what his deal is.

who’s the professor and who’s the TA: Wanda teaches a language course and she normally refuses to take a TA that’s not a native speaker like her but her colleagues convince her to let Vision have a shot because he works harder than anyone and his aptitude is incredible. ((why am i into these ones so much tonight this is patently NOT MY JAM normally- but for these ships? YES PLEASE.))

who’s the knight and who’s the prince(ss): Knight!Wanda and Prince!Vision. I feel Prince Vision is very reluctant to follow Lady Wanda out of the tower. His books, you see. He needs time to pack- and are you sure that rope is going to safely carry both our weights on the way down? I haven’t calculated it yet but I believe your armor alone could be enough to cause sufficient strain to-

who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent: Parent!Wanda, Teacher!Vision

who’s the writer and who’s the editor: Wanda is ready to move on to a different publishing house due to the higher ups wanting to gut her magnum opus, but Vision is determined to win them over without sacrificing the soul of her work.

That was so fun and I am a SUCKER for dumb aus!!!!

#essayofthoughts #i want every single one of these but i have way too many fucking wips #do it for the meme #crackship #angst crackship #winterwitch #quickbird #scarletvision #codependent supertwins #my beautiful bird son #cousin sergei #i don't have a vision tag?#i just spent almost two fucking hours on these while i watched a movie and made snacks lol #I LIVE FOR DUMB AUS

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rafespeaks · 7 years

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ANYWAY RANDOM HEADCANONS B/C NO ONE ELSE IS ONLINE TONIGHT

< > - means my gf @turbomun typed it

Hau

Imagine bby Hau when his dad first left. Imagine how confused & devastated he must've been. Imagine him sending letter after letter with his mom's help but only getting a few back. Imagine one day the return letters just... stop. Imagine Hau and his mom continuing to write letters until they start coming back as 'return to sender'. Imagine Hau not fully understanding why and continuing to write letters anyway, but just not sending them. Imagine him finally old enough to understand, but he keeps on writing them anyway, just because it's a little therapeutic and it's become a habit by now anyway. < Eventually he just stops sending them and keeps them in a box. He decides to give them to his dad if he ever sees him again. >

I've been thinking about how Hau may have met Nalani over the past few days, and what the circumstances might've been for Hala yelling in front of him, and just general bby Hau stuff. And I came up with some loose headcanons concerning that stuff. Hau used to go out and play with the Pichu around Iki Town all the time, and there was one that always seemed to love hanging around him no matter what, and it just... followed him home one day. Hala never liked Hau going to play with the Pichu because not every wild Pokemon is so friendly. He always lectured Hau about the dangers, especially of overaggressive Pokemon like you see charging at you in the grass and from bushes and shaking trees. Hau never really got it though - he was too young and all the Pokemon he'd met so far were friendly! This led to him getting too close to Hala's Tauros when it was worked up one day. It could've killed him and Hala was so scared for him and angry at his disobedience that he ended up shouting. This resulted in Hau being afraid of pissing off not only Hala but ANY kahuna. This is also why he says he couldn't ride a Tauros once Tauros is registered in your Ride Pager, though he's confident enough by the end of the game to learn to ride from Hala (as seen in the credits picture). (Typed on Feb. 11)

Some Hau headcanons no one asked for: He is gender fluid, tho he usually defaults to he/him. His assigned gender is male, though he would sometimes feel like he was a girl even from a very young age. He'd also get annoyed when people assumed he was just playing and pretending to be a girl. So when he first heard the terminology, he was ecstatic and was like "YES I'm THAT!!!" It was a similar story for him being gay. His first ever crush was on Ilima when he was six. Ofc, Ilima is a little old for him, so he eventually grew out of the crush and is simply Ilima's friend instead. Typically, Hau stays the same gender all day, but he has been known to switch. Especially after he's listened to a song he likes that has self-referencing pronouns. Bonus Hau/Gladion headcanon - if Gladion really DOES teach himself guitar, he'll change the pronouns in any love songs for Hau's current gender. Hau loves him to death for this... (Typed on Feb. 13)

Random headcanon: Typically, when Hau gets tired, he gets more active rather than less so. He turns all giddy and bouncy and it's really hard to get him to sit still unless he's in a bad mood or was sitting still already. So when he was younger and he started bouncing off the walls more than usual, that was his family's signal for 'okay, bedtime'. (Typed on Feb. 1)

Gladion

< ok but would Gladion play the acoustic guitar like a True Edgelord™ > OMG HAU WOULD M E L T < HAU STUMBLES UPON GLADION PLAYING GUITAR AND STOPS TO LISTEN > HE WOULD BE SO FLOORED LIKE "HOLY SHIT I'M SO IN OVER MY HEAD..................." < EVEN IF GLADION WAS A COMPLETE AMATEUR AND COULD ONLY PLAY WONDERWALL > (Typed on Jan. 29)

Red

Valentines Day shenanigans - Red would probably put a lot of thought into every aspect of anything he got Green, INCLUDING the card. < He would make his own with construction paper and 2/3 a bottle of glitter Glitter is all over the apartment for the next 6 months > RED U CHEESY BOI................ IMAGINE HIS POKEMON HELPING HIM. GLITTER ALL OVER THEIR CLAWS/PAWS/HANDS. ESPECIALLY HIS SHINY RAI < AND MEWTWO > Lol, Mewtwo would probably use his psychic powers and not even pick up the bottle. ... but then Raichu would smear him with glitter on purpose. GLITTER FIGHT!!!!! By the time it's over Red is just like "... this was a mistake..." < Green comes back like what the FUCK > (Typed on Feb. 12) + extra from another time IMAGINE RED MAKING A SPECIAL CARD FOR GREEN EVERY YEAR................... BONUS: GREEN DOESN'T EVEN REALIZE HE'S THE ONLY ONE RED MAKES A HAND-MADE CARD FOR & THAT ALL THE OTHER KIDS GET THE STORE-BOUGHT STUFF.

< When Red was a baby, he hated feeling like he was alone at any time. He easily fell asleep in just about anyone's arms, but wouldn't sleep in his crib unless he was given a stuffed toy or a soft blanket to cuddle with. Because of this, his parents always referred to him as a "snuggle-bug" > (Typed on Feb. 21)

(Not technically Red but...) - Btw!!! Plot bunny I forgot to tell you about!!! Imagine Mewtwo helping Raichu out with her newfound Psychic powers. B/c it's tough, he knows. Imagine her accidentally broadcasting her emotions tho it's always way more subtle than Mewtwo b/c she's not nearly as strong as him. Imagine she's so used to life as a Pikachu, she often forgets she even has psychic powers now. Sometimes she rolls onto her tail in the middle of the night and it starts floating and when she wakes up she's so startled she drops herself. IMAGINE PSYCHIC CHOCO CHU PROBLEMS < Mewtwo teaches ChocoChu about controlling her hovering and one day Red comes home to her nyooming around the house > Red just like "Holy heck you can do that now???" < Also Mew decides that ChocoChu is A Friend > ChocoChu is a Friend to Everyone (Typed on Feb. 27)

Lyra

I was looking for Japanese terms of endearment and... "Another common one is to use a suffix based upon some sort of adorable trait, like -rin or -pon, that as far as I can tell is based upon some part of their personality and/or physical appearance--for example, if a child was a particularly chubby baby, -pon might have stuck (used after a vowel sound, like 'Aki-pon', for example)" LYRA-PON......... < LYRA-PON!! > Also apparently the Japanese don't really use terms of endearment...?? Just... nicknames. But still, that was a good find.

Silver

... Sudden Silver headcanon. He yells a lot ofc but he can't really take too much yelling himself. Especially if it's directed at him from someone he cares about. < ...what if when Silver gets yelled at by someone he cares about, even if they apologize later, he tends to crave some kind of physical affection from them so that he knows they still care about him Not that he'd show it but he wants to be loved > < If u fight with Silver, the best thing to do afterwards is give him a hug > Yep... He'll probably stiffen up, and then cry into ur shoulder for a little while, but it'll have him feeling better a lot faster.

Tbh I can't really see Silver conforming to labels. He was born a boy, that's what he's used to. Call him whatever you want, he doesn't fuckin' care, but he won't go out of his way to correct you. He's just like "whatever". < He alternately describes his gender as "whatever" "who knows" and "yes" > LMAO YES < "What is your gender?" "yes" > X P I just felt like Silver's so confident in who he is as a person, he wouldn't actively ask anyone to change the pronouns they use for him. < "Are you a boy or a girl?" "I'm a Pokemon trainer" "yeah but what is your gender" "who knows" "but what's in your pants" "my PokeBalls" > (Typed on Feb. 13)

< Random and unexpectedly cute headcanon/idea thing?? Not something we'd ever RP but just something that popped into my head: Giovanni has to teach Silver how to shave > AHAHAHAHA Y E S Silver still hates cutting ANY of his hair but he hates having facial hair even MORE < Especially because pubescent facial hair is so UGLY AND GROSS LOOKING, finally one day he can't take it anymore and goes "Dad can I borrow your razor" And Giovanni is like "?? you're gonna shave?? well I have an extra razor but not so fast, I'm teaching you how to use it first" > Silver's just "UGH FINE JUST PLZ MAKE IT QUICK - THIS STUFF IS PISSING ME OFF" < You have just saved yourself many scratches down the line, believe me" So Giovanni is teaching him and at one point just comments, "you're lucky you have a safety razor. I had to learn using a straight razor which looks like you're trying to commit suicide every morning" > And Silver's just like "Yeah whatever, as long as I get this shit off, I don't really care what does it." < Father and son bond over complaining about goddamn fucking facial hair and Silver must have inherited his dislike from Gio because Gio is the most clean shaven guy EVER, he shaves every day no matter what "Shaving is what separates us from the cavemen son" > L M A O NO WAIT IMAGINE SILVER TEACHING ETHAN HOW TO SHAVE NOT LONG AFTER THAT < oh my GOD Ethan would grow a Baby's First Mustache and not even notice until Silver and Lyra go "what the fuck is on your face" > H A A A A A < Silver "Ethan I'm gonna show you how to shave. My dad says that this is what separates us from the cavemen." "...but what if I want to be a caveman" > "THEN YOU CAN SAY GOODBYE TO ANY POSSIBILITY OF KISSING ME" < "JUST KIDDING LETS LEARN TO SHAVE" > (Typed on Feb. 26)

... Imagine Silver getting into book repair... Like he finds a really battered book at a thrift store or in a library or smth and he just can't leave it there. So he takes it home and works on it until it looks goddamn beautiful. And if it's a library book he takes it back (even if he was told he could keep it) and the librarian is??? Just??? "How the hell did you do that wtf" < THATS APPROPRIATE I KNOW WAY TOO MUCH ABOUT BOOK REPAIR > and I literally made a book 4 u :P (Typed on Mar. 7)

Giovanni

< Giovanni has a habit of saying "close the light" instead of "turn off the light." This has to do with the expression for turning off the light in the Italian language. > ... Silver would SO tease him about it... All the time... < "hey dad did you remember to close the TV" "hey dad have you closed your computer yet" "hey dad you left the light open" "HEY DA > (Typed on Feb. 21)

My mom just showed me a picture of a bumper sticker on facebook that said "Proud parent of a great kid that is sometimes an asshole and that's ok". I immediately thought of Giovanni & Silver. < I want them to have one of those knitted cruets that says "God Bless This Asshole Family" > (Typed on Feb. 8)

< ok random thought but I've always had the headcanon that Giovanni drinks -- only in moderation, sometimes he'll have a glass of wine at night or sometimes a shot of something stronger if he's feeling anxious. but he usually doesn't drink in front of Silver and one day Silver walks in the kitchen and sees Giovanni pouring a drink and is immediately horrified "DAD ARE YOU AN ALCOHOLIC DO YOU NEED AN INTERVENTION" >

Lusamine

... What do u think of Lusamine having Lillie take flute lessons < She probably had a strict regimen of Approved Extracirricular Activities for her kids > Yup. Lots of classy instrument lessons probably. No art tho - too messy and you can't really measure art by 'perfection'. Reading fiction was highly discouraged. Lusamine would throw out books she didn't approve of. 'Play time' was allowed with her in-game team of Pokemon, though it was more like sitting quietly while they pet the Pokés. They probs know a decent amount about sciencey shit tho they weren't supposed to go near the labs. Perfect handwriting was stressed and Lillie can and does write in picturesque cursive (it is EXTREMELY rare for her to write in print). You could ask her to do greeting cards. Toys in general were more or less frowned upon, but she allowed them to have some as long as they put them EXACTLY where they go when they're done playing. If not, the toy is thrown away. Gladion has had more toys thrown away than Lillie. No videogames. Ever. No TV either. ... Damn I feel bad just writing this... < I mean, all that would apply only AFTER Mohn fucked off to PokePelago, and we don't know how old they were when that happened. > Y E P It would probably be at least... oh, say... five years? So Lillie would've been about six and Gladion eight. Yeah, I think that fits. Lillie can remember a time her mother was kind, before their father disappeared, so it couldn't have been TOO long ago. But it would've had to have been long enough for Lusamine to gather all the resources she would've needed to execute her plan.

Guzma

I gotta ask tho - what do you think Guzma and Hala's relationship was like when he was young? Because the text after you battle him seems to say they pretty much acted as master/apprentice for a while. ... I kinda wonder if Guzma respected him more as a father figure than his own dad... < ok but Hala has that temper right?? WHAT IF ONE DAY GUZMA DID SOMETHING STUPID AND HALA STARTED YELLING AT HIM AND GUZMA JUST CRINGES AND BACKS AWAY AND SUDDENLY HALA MAKES THE CONNECTION BETWEEN THAT BEHAVIOR AND THE FACT THAT GUZMA ALWAYS SEEMS TO HAVE CUTS AND BRUISES AND WONT SAY WHERE THEY CAME FROM > OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO < AND HE IMMEDIATELY CALMS DOWN AND COMFORTS GUZMA AND ASSURES HIM THAT HE WOULD NEVER HIT HIM > I LOVE Y E S

< - Guzma and Luna commiserating bc Lillie left and Luna's upset and Guzma is like "ya I feel you there, my boyfriend left me and took up with some broad. I thought we had something special y'know?" > YYYYYEEEEESSSSSS < - Guzma and Kukui were dating after Guzma adopted his loud, brash, thuggish personality, so Guzma was never shy during their relationship...until Kukui broke up with him. Now he's a complete wreck in romantic situations. > S H I T......... POOR BOI......... < - Guzma legit thought that he and Kukui would be together for life, he never anticipated that they'd break up - and Kukui is the hardest person for Guzma to forgive after Team Skull disbands And yeah, it's gotta hurt to see your old flame get MARRIED > Just imagine how shitty Guzma would've felt directly after his first battle with Luna... Not only is Kukui COMPLETELY unfazed by seeing him again, but the man sends a KID who JUST MOVED HERE to beat down HIS EX BOYFRIEND......... < Like JESUS FUCK HE CAN'T EVEN BOTHER TO BATTLE ME HE THINKS THAT LITTLE OF ME?? I think Kukui is just kinda...disappointed that Guzma went down this path? Like he knew he could've been better > HE DOESN'T EVEN RESPECT MY STRENGTH ENOUGH TO FIGHT ME AS A FELLOW ADULT - HE HAS A KID DO IT AND SHE S T I L L BEAT MY ASS < KUKUI WAS PROBABLY TRYING TO SAVE GUZMA SOME HURT GIVEN THE FACT THAT HE COULD WIPE THE FUCKING FLOOR WITH GUZMA > Yeah... Guzma would be too hurt by everything that's happened between them to care that he's 'disappointed'

IMAGINE KUKUI AND SYCAMORE TALKING ABOUT RESEARCH OR SOME SHIT THO AND MAYBE SYCAMORE COMES TO ALOLA FOR SOME REASON AND HE AND GUZMA MEET AND GUZMA'S JUST LIKE "HOLY SHIT AND HERE I THOUGHT KUKUI WAS THE ONLY HOT YOUNG PROFESSOR AROUND" < GUZMA HAS A TYPE Kukui: Guzma, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine, Professor Sycamore! *close up of Guzma staring while "At Last, My Love" plays in the background* >

Y'know, I was thinking about how Guzma and Plumeria would've met the other day. I 100% bet you it would've been after Guz ran away. He's passing through Ula'ula Island with his Pokemon, trying to find a place to crash for the night. He comes to that trailer park area and ends up bumping into Plumeria. Literally. "Hey, watch it, asshole!" "You watch it, bitch - I'm walkin' here!" "The fuck you just call me?!" "You heard me!" "You wanna go?!" "Bring it on, miss priss!" Long story short, they get into a fist fight. Plumes throws the first punch because Guz has been taught not to hit girls by his mom but he's not opposed to self defense. And by the end they're just... completely winded and beat all to hell... And they just... "... You fight good." "Thanks. You too." "Hey. You wanna swing by my house and grab a soda or something?" "... Got any Tapu Cocoa?" And then next thing you know it's just... "Yo, Grams! This is my new friend, Guzma!" < Guzma: "hey Plumeria wanna DISMANTLE THE OPPRESSIVE ESTABLISHMENT BY RAPPING AGRESSIVELY AT BUS SIGNS" Plumeria: "sure lemme just grab some popcorn" >

< In game: Faba is a challenger to the championship In RP: Faba is in FUCKING JAIL WHERE HE BELONGS Also Guzma will probably have to do community service at the very least > Yeah I agree... Wouldn't be surprised if he'd be under house arrest, too, which would explain his return to his childhood home. (Imagine him hiding the ankle bracelet from his mother.........) < Actually, I think there's a thing where you're allowed out in the community if you have someone supervising you at all times? Imagine Hala stepping up to be the Guzma Supervisor > I LOVE................... < He probably wouldn't be sentenced as harshly if he could prove that he was manipulated by Lusamine, but still...vandalism and petty theft and all that > Ye. Not to mention, y'know, takING OVER A WHOLE FUCKING TOWN... (How could he have even done that anyway?? Was it already partially deserted and the rumors are just vastly exaggerated, or...???) < I'm gonna take a wild guess here and say: Aether did it They did it to convince Guzma that allying with them could benefit both parties, plus it would give Team Skull a stronghold Which would be good for Aether when they needed Team Skull to do dirty work > Ye, they probably just straight-up bought the whole damn place. < And then sent their own members disguised as Skull grunts to drive everyone out and kick up the rumors. Which would make people avoid the town. > L M A O Hold on wait wait. I just got the greatest mental image. Imagine Guzma leading them RIDING HIS FUCKING GOLISOPOD LIKE A GODDAMN STEED THAT'D MAKE A FUCKING IMPRESSION!! X D < FICKJNG >

Currently RPing this - Btw... I thought of something of my own... Guzma kinda got off easy with that trip to Ultra Space, right? Well, what if he DIDN'T...? I was thinking about how he was just hangin' out there and how he'd been briefly possessed by the Nihilego... And what if he really wasn't okay mentally - what if he was dissociating? And it becomes, like, a huge problem for him, and that's a big reason that he gave up on Team Skull and went home. B/c if the grunts are mainly teenage kids with nowhere else even remotely healthier to go, why the hell would Guzma give up on them unless he had to? Think about it. His Pokemon = Therapy Bugs... < GOOD!! THERAPY BUGS!!! > ONE OF THE ONLY WAYS HE CAN FEEL BETTER IS BY MAINTAINING CONTACT WITH ONE OF HIS BUG BUDDIES, ESPECIALLY GOLISOPOD......... < Wouldn't he have like...a minor version of what Lusamine has, almost?? His system wouldn't be swamped with neurotoxins but they still would have effected him. And I was reading about someone with dissociation issues and like...sometimes you can't remember what you're supposed to do?? Even if it's something super simple. The person I read about was like...she went to the bank, was gonna write two checks, but then after the first one she literally could not remember what she was supposed to do with the second one. > Yeah, I think he would've. Ofc, that would mean that the doctors that sent him home Fucked Up™ And huh... I'll have to keep that in mind... >:3 < Tru, but the doctors had never encountered something like that before. As someone who's been hospitalized, if you have no symptoms, they won't do extensive tests. And even if he had symptoms he would have been just like I Wanna Get The Fuck Out Of Here™ > Ye, tru. Guz was goin' home and AIN'T NO ONE GONNA STOP 'IM. Straight back to the mansion, plop down with his buggies and some room-temp Tapu Cocoa (b/c who can be assed to warm it up when you just came back from an alternate dimension where you've been dissociating & are now dead tired???), and then straight to sleep b/c fuck the world it can W A I T. < And Guzma doesn't strike me as the type to seek help if he has psychological warning signs. > N O P E... It would take a friend AND his bugs pestering him about it non-stop to get him to go see someone. Tho most of his buggies are nonverbal and he doesn't have a communicator anyway, so it's mostly flat looks and annoyed clicking sounds. < Lmao Luna translating tho "Golisopod thinks you're being a stubborn asshole" > "weLL FUCK YOU TOO, MAN!" >:CCC Imagine after Guzma challenges Luna and says he'll be waiting at the beach, he gets there and... just... "... The fuck was I doing...??" (Also "You tell my mom those 'rumors' are true, I'll kiCK YOUR ASS, KID") < Luna shows up "okay what do you want" ".....I don't....... remember.........." > That's the first tip-off to anyone other than Plumeria & his parents that something's W R O N G < And at first she thinks he's joking cause "how do you not REMEMBER, you clearly had a good idea of what you wanted five minutes ago" > He just gets super annoyed and stressed out of nowhere "I don't fucKING K N O W, OKAY?!?! I JUST DON'T REMEMBER!!!" < And she just kinda jumps back like "ok Arceus fuck then I'm leaving" > And he just... doesn't know what to do b/c this has been happening a lot and it's NOT STOPPING.........

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fish-nibbler · 7 years

Note

lol, you silly nerd XD. 1-104. Have fun. *hugs*

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? “Ffffuuuuuu-” Although, honestly.. I don’t know what I would feel if I woke up.. naked.. next to her..

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? Pff- Hell if I know

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? I would do drugs with them so… But I’m single, so, eh.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? Yea

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? Yeah, very recently actually

7. What does your last received text say? “Nice”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Uh.. Three times

9. Where was your last kiss at? School in Freshman Corner

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? I’m an only child

11. What do you drink in the morning? Water

12. Where did you sleep last night? My bedroom

13. Do you think relationships are hard? Yes, but I believe that once you find the right person, its worth it.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? Yes

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? I mean… maybe? I don’t know.. I haven’t really gotten to talk to them lately

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Maybe just cloudy..

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? Nope

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? Yoga pants

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? No

20. Does anyone like you? No.

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Technically yes, but they go by another name.

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? extremely

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Yes

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? Yes

25. In the past week have you cried? Many times

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? German Shepard

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? Nope

29. Do you think you’re old? No

30. Do you like text messaging? Eh.. I prefer face to face

31. What type of day are you having? It’s if-fy… Only one good think happened

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? At one point I kind wanted to do it, but eh. I wouldn’t be able to pull it off.

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? Warm

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Eh

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? A relationship

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? Kinda a mix?

37. What song are you listening to? I’m not, I’m listening to Archer.

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Yes. I apologize a lot, but I mean it everytime39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? Probably40. What made you start liking the person you like now? A lot of things.. but she says her a I can’t be in a relationship.. so I know I shouldn’t like her anymore.. I just don’t know.. I can’t just stop41. When did you last receive a text message? 5:53 pm42. What is wrong with you right now? I want to get high, cut, and have sex with someone without having a panic attack - obviously not in that order.43. How well do you know the last female you texted? According to her I don’t know anything about her..44. Does anyone disgust you? Almost everyone at my school does.45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? Depends on who they were46. Are you in a good mood right now? No47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? My mom48. What color shirt are you wearing? Pink49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? Yes50. Anyone you’re giving up on? Can I count myself? If so, then I’m giving up on myself..51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? No.. I just hate myself for it..

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? Yeah53. Do you like rain? Yes54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? Again, I’m single. But, again, I’d probably try drinking with them so..55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? Yes56. Do you like to cuddle? OMG yes57. Are you shy? Very58. Do you get along with girls? Kinda59. Have you dated the person you texted last? Yes60. What do you carry with you at all times? I don’t have a reason to carry anything with me.. I used to carry one of my exes necklaces all the time but then she hurt me.. and then broke the necklace when she was trying to grab the collar of my shirt.. 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? Sure62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? I wish I could.. but everyone hates me eventually within a month..63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? No64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? Yes. My face would still turn dark red65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? No

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? Well.. I’ve only ever kissed three people so.. the first person should be 17 now, the second I think is 18 and the third is 17.. I think.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Do them myself 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Neither69. Do you have any stickers on your car? No 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? I don’t know either artist 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Last year 73. Do you like diet soda? No 74. What color are the walls in your room? Dark blue-ish purple-ish colors 75. Are you 16 or older? yes76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? No 77. Do you have a job? No 78. What are your initials? EPA 79. Did you ever have braces? Yes 80. Are you from the south? No

81. What does your last status on facebook say? I don’t remember 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? No 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Mom 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? No 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? Moana.. on a date.. embarrassing myself.. 86. Do you smoke? I wish 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Heels 88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? It’s naturally straight 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? No.. not yet 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Lake 92. Have you ever made out in a car? I wish 93. …Had sex in a car? I WISH 94. Are you single or in a relationship? Single 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Getting high off inhalants 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? A few years ago 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Yeh 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? again.. I wish 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? Haven’t drank yet 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? I don’t use facebook anymore so.. 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? No 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Don’t have one 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Nope 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? I don’t wear shorts

#answering asks #aerllette

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legendofgrump · 7 years

Note

Talk bout dem OCs, drop your rant. Wanna hear their stories yo

omg who are you because you just flattered me hardcore. Ahh I’ll put them under a cut so I don’t make everyone hate me with non-fandom stuff. And if you wanna ask more questions or anything, I have a blog specifically for talking about my OCs which is @meme-team-adventures !!! (But also if you don’t that’s cool too, I know not everyone is into that ahhh I’m rambling already). Anyway!!

Most of them have rp/ask blogs which I’ll also link to when I mention them if you’re Really into it for some reason, but I haven’t done anything with any in a while and some of them might be kinda bare.

ANYWAY (part 2)

@confused-snail which actually just used to be my personal blog (and also my main blog goddammit) turned into an rp blog for a self-insert. So Snail is a 29 year old freelance artist. They’re nonbinary/demiboy who got bottom surgery so they could have a dick and sometimes they still get dysphoria over their chest (which they will one day get the surgery to remove) but they’re generally okay with how they look! They’re very aggressive and abrasive and also very controlling. They have the hardest time giving other people control because they kinda use it to avoid getting hurt like they did in a past relationship. Anyway they’re a pretty big meme most of the time. They love eating, sleeping, and they’re always down for some sex, especially with their boyfriend Daniel, but they exclusively top as part of their constant need to be in control. They get irritated kind of easily if you push the right buttons, but are generally pretty lazy/laid back and chill. They LOVE to laugh at stupid memes and stuff. And they also have pretty cool piercings and kind of lowkey wanna get a tattoo but they’re not really sure of what. They got a degree in art, though their grades were pretty bad because they weren’t in a good place during college, but they did graduate which they’re really proud of!

@death-and-fireflies I don’t know if he really counts as an OC but he might as well haha. But basically I had this Grump AU where everything was basically the same except that Dan was an immortal harbinger of lost souls that manifested in the form of fireflies. He’s blind, but his eyes glow really bright yellow (just like the fireflies that float around his head) and he’s lived on his own kind of nomadically for the longest time. He’s generally quiet and reserved and a little shy because he deals a lot with the dead and usually the living don’t want much to do with him, but he’s also really thoughtful and a little philosophical and very kind! He cares very much for the souls that he’s destined to take care of and his entire life purpose is to help them move on and get whatever unfinished business they have out of the way so they can finally find peace. He currently has a boyfriend named Kenry and a (basically) adopted daughter named Alice who kind of help him live his life without all the constant anxiety and hopelessness that comes with dealing constantly with the dead and some very talkative souls.

@wolf-in-sarcasms-clothing Marianne is a monster girl who kind of resembles a spider? I mean not technically because...not at all. But we call her a spider/bug babe so just roll with it. But she has four arms and one eye and very sharp teeth. And also she eats humans. Funny, right? She used to live in a heavily secluded cave system with the rest of her kind, where they were apart from humanity and only hunted wild animals and that worked. But then a companion that Marianne had used and manipulated her until she got so angry and felt so betrayed that she ate them and got kicked out of her clan and banished from the caves. So she kind of wandered into the human world until she stumbled across Daniyal and (separately) Kenry, who both kind of took her in despite her threatening to eat both of them at first meeting. She loves physical affection (pets, hair playing, scritches) and once given this affection, she’s much more like a big, dumb doggo that likes to play and cuddle and is basically a six foot tall lap dog.

@flirtbot3000 Originally spawned because I kept sending all of my friends’ muses/rp blogs flirts and pick up lines, so I just made a character for it. Andy is a pleasure bot designed for platonic, romantic, and sexual affection depending on the desires of the person they’re with at the time. Though most often they just end up having sex haha. But they’re a cute android that is extremely compliant and loves to please whoever they’re with and they legitimately also just enjoy having sex in general. They’ve done a lot of things in their life, such as being a pinup girl, modeling for magazines and fashion lines, and just straight up doing porn, and they enjoyed it all! But then they also accidentally fell in love with an interdimensional farm boy named Daniyal who accidentally turned them human when they had sex and then had sex with them again and turned them back into an android. But they love him regardless and the two are very happy together and it’s really pure and cute.

@of-bats-and-lovers (This one kind of links to two OCs but I’ll explain that hold on to your pants.) Beauregard (or just Bo is fine) is a bat boy that is rich as hell and lives for parties and meeting people. His biggest goal in life is to find his One and Only true love darling. But it’s kind of difficult because he had this person and then he lost her and just can’t seem to get over her. All of his riches came from when he was a thief and criminal with his true love, so they’re all stolen or at least not legally obtained. But, y’know, he keeps that under wraps. He likes partying and drinking (he’s kind of a heavyweight, but that doesn’t stop him from getting buzzed) and just generally having a good time. He’ll “fall in love” with anyone that gives him a smile or says something nice and then will fall out of love the morning after and go into a bit of a depressed mood that he’ll cheer himself up from by going to a party. (And thus the cycle continues.)

Esky is the Bonnie to Bo’s Clyde and the love that Bo lost to a big stand off with police and a well-aimed bullet. Or at least, that’s kind of what he thinks. Esky was shot and declared dead, but actually, y’know, wasn’t. So when she woke up in the morgue, very confused and alone, she made her escape and went on the run so as not to get caught and actually killed. She heard that Bo was also declared dead (which wasn’t true at all. He escaped and the media declared it because they didn’t want people to panic that this great criminal was still on the run) so she focused on getting herself to safety. The two have kind of been looking for each other ever sense, but also at the same time thinking that the other is dead so the search is fruitless.

@interstellar-superstar Venus is an alien from an unspecified location is space that came to earth and became an international pop star. She sings really well and is a positive and peppy girl, so the people adore her. But it also kind of taxes her because she has to hide the fact that she’s not from earth for fear of the government taking her and experimenting on her or at the very least, locking her up. She has a third eye and her skin is actually bright yellow, but luckily she can cover the eye with her hair and the general public believes that the yellow skin is just extreme dedication and a lot of body paint. So for the most part she’s okay, but there’s always a bit of stress with interviewers finding out about her true home. She’s also very easily confused about basic earth culture because she’s a sheltered celebrity and kind of fell into stardom from the moment she came to earth. So she has no idea what things like french fries are. Or memes. Or anything of the sort. And she also has no idea about basic geography, so she’ll just spout out random locations whenever someone asks her where she’s from. And the answer is always different. It’s adorable. She’s currently in a poly relationship with two cuties, Charlie and Avery, and she loves them both very dearly.

The next three are all from @here-queer-full-of-cheer and they’re all friends and roommates. They’re also all in a poly relationship with Danny Sexbang called polybang or Sexbang’s Angels so just that’s great too.

Nikki is a laid back guitarist that dropped out of high school to pursue a music career with her band. They’re semi-successful, at least locally, but they’re really trying to make it in the big time. She’s desperate to make this all work out because she wants dropping out of high school and never going to college to be worth it, especially since it kind of disappointed her family and makes her look bad to a lot of dumb soccer moms that need her to know their opinions. She loves music more than anything. Listening, writing, performing, she loves the whole process and always gives it the full attention it deserves. She’ll block off entire chunks of time just to listen to a new album, laying on her bed with her eyes closed in the dark just so she can full appreciate it.

Bailey is a nonbinary artist with a degree in specifically Color Theory. They love painting, especially with oil and acrylic, and uses big dramatic colors and shapes. They’re actually really good at realism, though they mostly paint scenes and locations, rather than like portraits or anything. (Not to say they wouldn’t paint those things, though.) They’re also really into the abstract and are currently experimenting with that. Also! They’re really bubbly and sweet and friendly, especially with small children. They love supporting their friends and just being chipper and happy in general. Also they have the raddest bright pink hair with a partly shaved blonde half and it’s really cool okay.

Megan is kinda cold and calculating and currently working on her PhD in physics. She puts a lot of pressure on herself and her academics and tells herself that she has to spend most of her life studying/working if she wants to get the grades she wants and graduate. A lot of the time she puts her health to the side in favor of studying and will go too long without eating or sleeping because of an essay. But she’s really passionate about what she’s doing and loves every second of the knowledge she gains. She’s a little rough at showing affection and generally has a hard time saying it in person. A lot of the time, if she has something important or generally sappy to say, she’ll write it down in one of her many, many journals that she uses as a diary/vent place, and then show it to the person she has to say the thing to, because she finds it easier to get her thoughts down on paper than to say them. But she does feel love deep in her cold, cold heart haha. Also she’s super kinky ;)

@cookie-dough-boy is a little trans sheepie boy named Cookie. He’s very soft and chubby, but also extremely full of anxiety and self-doubt. He cares about his friends more than himself and will put them before himself no matter what. He’s a total momma’s boy that will constantly call and check on his mom or visit her just to see how she’s doing and he loves her more than anything else in the world. She taught him like all of the recipes he knows and basically how to be an adult in general and he’s so grateful for her. He’s a little coffee shop barista and kind of hates his job because he works with pricks, but the customers are usually pretty nice to him, which makes it kind of worth it. Plus he gets paid, so. And he’s dating a very edgy, 2cool4me guy named Mortar who you would not expect to actually be involved with him at all but it’s really cute and they’re soft together it’s great.

The last three have no blogs because they’re pretty new OCs, but descriptions anyway!

Blythe: She’s the goddess of deception and also a beautiful trans prankster that loves fucking with mortals in little, inconvenient ways, like enchanting underwear drawers not to open or making arcade cabinets shoot out quarters. She’s generally pretty chill and likes humans well enough, but she still has a Goddess Complex where she kind of feels like she’s above them just in general. But she treats them fine, she just gets a little arrogant sometimes. Also she’ll do humans favors like try to talk them into Valhalla and stuff because she knows all the gods and goddesses and has cool connections so why not. She’s immortal and has really big, cool wings, that are even taller than her own six foot self like wow she’s got a massive wingspan.

Cleona: She’s a smol chubby mechanic girl that loves tinkering with tech and being a general dork. She likes reverse engineering things and figuring out how they work and go back together, but she’s also a bit messy and sometimes the things she’s taken apart can’t get put back together because she lost pieces/they got mixed in with another thing that needs to be put back together. She’s very very gay and also super friendly and chill in general. Also she wears these really big, clunky combat boots that are way to big for her smol feets because she wants to be taller. But they don’t fit her like at all, and there’s a running gag that she just always has asinine bullshit shoved insider her boots.

Maxim: Asshole. 100% irredeemable fuckhead. The personification of anxiety, basically, that will universally fuck with you until you no longer want to live on this planet. He’s a piece of shit that does it just for the hell of it. He’s also from the world behind mirrors that’s a reflection of the Real World (I’m sure you’ve heard this trope before lol). He can put his voice into people’s heads and fuck with them from there until they feel like they’re going insane from all the insecurity he’s putting in their heads and whatnot. And he’s just...the actual worst. He has no redeeming qualities. He’s an immortal demon boy that gets a kick out of making people’s lives horrible. Also he really likes hot pockets.

#my ocs #long post #i'm so sorry about all this rambling #please go to the other blog if you wanna ask more questions or something #haha sorry about all this~#anon #ask

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lysitheaioandeuropa · 7 years

Text

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? “where are we going for breakfast?”

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? not at all tbh

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? mhmmm

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? i think thats part of learning life lessons and shit

7. What does your last received text say? “we like trying fancy waters”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? countless

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? pheeewwww lmfao like over a year ago.

11. What do you drink in the morning? water, iced tea, and coffee, all in that order

12. Where did you sleep last night? my comfortable ass bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? yes man. even more so with BPD bc that “you go through 8 breakups a day and the other person doesn’t even know” post is dumb accurate. sometimes i’m level-headed and I trust my feelings and want to act on them, other times I don’t know if trusting them is wise, but I still FEEL things that i’m not sure what to do about.

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? HMMM YES YES YES. WOW. YES. I DON’T THINK I HAVE EVER YES’D SO HARD AT SOMETHING.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? not at all.

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? rainy. I’m a hombody anyway, at least rainy I can enjoy it

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? who doesn’t?

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? Black jeans

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I would like to hope so

20. Does anyone like you? mhm, little more than that

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Idk, probably have

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? A few people from work come to mind lol

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? I have three

25. In the past week have you cried? better question is in the past week have i NOT cried?

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? red nose pitbull mix

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? out of the shower. half and half kinda

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? no

29. Do you think you’re old? existential crisis over my age on a daily basis

30. Do you like text messaging? yeah, its not as “personal,” but i like having the time to think about what i want to say. I am a better writer than i am an eloquent speaker

31. What type of day are you having? I’m not sure. I think I’m having a good one for now.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? I have pierced it, multiple times. have a ring in it now

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? 60 degrees and sunny and cloudless is THE perfect weather.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? mhm

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? bruh I can’t properly answer this i do not fucking know. I hate flings but relationships are energy i do not have bc hardly have any for myself

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? simple in some regards, complicated in others. more simple though, definitely. the complicated comes from being “picky,” or just aka, knowing exactly what i want and what i will or won’t put up with and so on and so forth.

37. What song are you listening to? settle down (young ruffian remix). I have been listening to the 1975, getting in my feels and shit.

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? 98% of the time i genuinely really really do. I never intentionally hurt people. But I’ve also previously owned up to the fact that i know i am super selfish and lack the proper empathy to deal w certain situations and thats where that other 2% goes to. 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? yes 41. When did you last receive a text message? right now (7:33PM) 42. What is wrong with you right now? What isn’t wrong w me omg lmao. I’m having trouble answering these as candidly as I used to 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? girl*, woman*, lady*, anything other than female jfc. and probably the girl i know the best atm 44. Does anyone disgust you? honestly, i’d probably get chewed out for this but most men. not on some “all men suck” bullshit, but more so “still dealing w some trauma and don’t know where i stand rn” 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? no? 46. Are you in a good mood right now? haven’t decided, but I am pretty nonchalant atm which is better than crying in despair every five seconds 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? Michelle + co. 48. What color shirt are you wearing? my black work polo

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? hmm.. yes 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? considering giving up on a few people lol 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? not at all

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? mhm, goes back to that life lessons thing 53. Do you like rain? love that shit 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? not really 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? mhm 56. Do you like to cuddle? mhm! 57. Are you shy? it doesn’t seem like it bc i have learned how to fake being a people person, but i rly am 58. Do you get along with girls? no, not usually 59. Have you dated the person you texted last? mhm 60. What do you carry with you at all times? my phone, and even then i dont always have it 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? hell yeah i would 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? mhm 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? mhm 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? of course 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? hmm.. i’m sure something has. Michelle brought me butterfingers to work, and i brought her m&ms. my friend brought me tacos for lunch at work today.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? i’ll pay for my toes but do my hands myself 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? neither 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? nah 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? nah canceled at boff lmao 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? i don’t recall really 73. Do you like diet soda? i don’t like any soda at all 74. What color are the walls in your room? off-white and dust rose 75. Are you 16 or older? yes 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? only to season 4 77. Do you have a job? i have two 78. What are your initials? CMG 79. Did you ever have braces? nah, i didn’t even go to the dentist for the first time until i was 20yo 80. Are you from the south? mhm technically, FL

81. What does your last status on facebook say? I haven’t made one 82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? no i don’t unfortunately 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? mom, but bc she’s forced our relationship on me 84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? cheerleading but i wish i had done gymnastics 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? fantastic beasts and where to find them i believe 86. Do you smoke? mhm 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? like to go out? heels 88. Is your phone touch screen? mhm 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? curly 90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? mhm lmao 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? springs 92. Have you ever made out in a car? i have 93. …Had sex in a car? i also have 94. Are you single or in a relationship? relationship 95. What were you doing last night at midnight? hanging out at home 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? new years eve 97. Do you like the camera on your phone? fuckkkk yeah that 7+ 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? yeah that didnt work, not my thing 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? lmfao oh man yes ): 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? no 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? once 102. Name your favorite Kesha song: we r who we r and die young i think. cannibal and blow are really good too. 103. Do you have any tan lines right now? yes, not cute but i also just bought a new bathing suit that i hope i will tan better in 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? nahhh

#personal #?#i finished this a couple weeks ago

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