#OH MY GOD ALICE YOU FUCKING GENIUS

[idiocracyisreal]

Holy shit.

Oliver spring was in fact in heartstopper. But through a song.

seven.

#what the fuck #wtf #osemanverse #alice oseman #heartstopper #nick and charlie #solitaire #taylor swift #radio silence #loveless #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #wtf is going on #I JUST REALISED #BECAUSE IN SOLITAIRE HE’S 🍂SEVEN🍂 #ALICE IS PAYING TRIBUTE TO HIM THROUGH A FUCKING SONG #OH MY GOD ALICE YOU FUCKING GENIUS #I LOVE YOU #LIKE THINK ABOUT IT #SHES INSANE ITS TOO PERFECT

[athenasparrow]

“you left your underwear back at my place.” Jily

Because this made me laugh when I read it

I hope this makes you laugh too @liiilyevans 😂

Rating: M

Send me a prompt

When Lily wakes up, it’s to a pounding headache and a bitter taste in her mouth that informs her – in a voice that sounds eerily like Petunia – that she shouldn’t have downed the five flaming vodka shots at the end of the night. But Marlene had already ordered them and it would’ve been such a waste.

Lily groans and reaches for her phone, determined to tell Marlene off for making her feel so damn horrible, but she's rather distracted by the message that blinks innocently at her on the screen.

Unknown: Hi : D You left your underwear at my place. Let me know when you're awake - I can drop them off.

Lily stares at the message...someone has obviously typed in the wrong number; it was hazy, but she remembers getting in the cab alone. And her underwear was still–

Oh no.

Lily frantically yanks up her dress, staring in horror at her very knickerless–

Lily: Who is this?

Had she shagged the cab driver? She couldn’t remember if he was cute or not. Oh god, what if she’d given in to the building super who had been hitting on her for months. He was like fifty! That would explain why he had her number. Shit, double shit. 

Lily: Is this Horace? 

Unknown: Wait, you're shagging Slughorn?

A wave of pure relief swept through Lily; she was not – thank god – shagging her super.

Lily: No! No more questions!

Who are you?

I’ve woken up with no knickers and am now checking the opening hours for my nearest chemist so I can go buy a fucking pregnancy test.

And get an STI screening!

I do not have time for games right now!

Tell me who you are and return my knickers at once!

Unknown:

Woah, hold on a sec

You don’t need a pregnancy test or an STI screening

At least not because of last night

Lily:

And how would you know that genius?

Unless you’re infertile and a virgin there’s a chance of both!

Again, who am I speaking with?????

Unknown: I am neither infertile nor a virgin

Lily: Then you don’t “know” shit, do you?

Unknown: But we did not have sex last night

Lily: Oh!

Unknown: And this is your neighbour, James

Lily: I don’t have a neighbour named James!

James: I beg to differ. Listen, can you answer your door?

Even with that warning, Lily still jumped when a sharp rap sounded in her apartment. She had quite a few things to say to this man! She didn’t have a neighbour named James; she would know, she’d been living in this apartment for three years. Alice and Frank lived down the hall – they were looking for a bigger place since the arrival of their little one – in number seven. Arabella – a lady who had more cats than square metres – lived in number six. Number five held a charming set of twins – Gideon and Fabian – who Lily was happy to flirt with every time they got mail at the same time. She was in number five and number four–

Oh no.

Lily doesn't have time to stop her hand as it reaches out in front of her and opens the door.

Fit bloke from number four.

He looks even more delicious and Lily is suddenly rather regretful he’d said they hadn’t shagged. But she’s distracted from that thought by the sudden assault of memories.

***

“Pads?” James calls, hearing the door slam shut. He barely glances up from his phone as he frowns at the latest next his mother’s sent him. 

He does jump up at the ensuing crash – and rather loud silence in place of his brother’s usual greeting – running to the hallway and greeted with a rather strange sight.

The beautiful redhead from number five is sprawled out on his floor and seems to be giving her shoe a rather harsh verbal lashing.

“What are you making me trip for, you stupid thing!”

“Are you sure it’s the shoe that made you trip and not the several glasses of whatever you’ve been drinking?” James interrupts with a laugh.

She spins around, obviously caught by surprise, before letting out a triumphant yell as she yanks one heel off, then the other, tossing them carelessly over her shoulder. James winces at the mark the first one leaves on his wall but decides it’s nothing when her second shoe narrowly misses the vase his mother had gifted him.

“I think you’re in the wrong apartment,” James says kindly. She looked quite plastered. “Would you like me to–”

“I’m not in the wrong apartment!” Lily interrupts confidently. “You’re fit-man!”

“I’m James actually?” James says, rather bewildered. “And if anyone is fit here, it’s you!”

The redhead looks rather delighted at his compliment. “That’s excellent that you think so! This will work rather nicely then!”

“What will work nic– Hey! What are you doing?” 

Jame thinks it’s a fair question since she’s hiked up her dress – he was not going to look – and was tugging her deep blue lacy knickers – no looking! – down her pale legs. 

“Well, how are we supposed to do it with them on?” The redhead says, shooting him a look that James thinks is supposed to mean duh when in reality, he’s quite far from understanding anything at the moment.

“It?” James asks, clearing his throat and happy she doesn't appear to notice he sounds like a frog.

“Don’t you know what sex is?” And now she’s giggling at him, bright and free and drunk.

“I know what sex is,” James feels the need to clarify. “But we can’t do it right now.” No matter how much I wish we could.

“Why not?” She demands, her eyes wide – and mesmerising – and horrified as she stares at him.

“Because you’re drunk,” James breaks to her gently, fighting back a laugh. “And I don’t even know your name.”

“Lily.” A pause. “I suppose it would be odd to have sex with me when you don’t know my name.”

James nods vigorously, glad she’s seeing some sense. Hopefully he can convince her to go back to her apartment so he doesn't have to keep telling his cock to stay the fuck down. 

“It’s a pity I’m drunk,” she tells him. “I was really hoping for an orgasm before bed, it really helps me sleep, you know?”

James chokes on the very air he was supposed to be breathing. He does know but he’s not going to tell her that. “I suppose you’ll have to sort that out yourself."

Lily heaves a long sigh like he’s announced Christmas has been cancelled. “Are you sure you can’t help me?” she pouts.

You’re sure James, he tells himself sternly. 

“I’m sure,” he confirms. “You’re drunk.” He says this out loud for his benefit as much as for hers.

“So you would help me if I wasn’t drunk?” 

I would bury my face between your legs and make you cum over and over again.

“Would love to,” James says instead. “If you still want to of course.”

“I’ll still want to,” Lily declares surely and James hopes so, but he won’t hold it against her if she doesn’t. “Oh no!”

“Oh no what?” 

“I’m going to be sick.”

Well shit. 

James scrambles to his feet, thankful the bathroom is in the hallway as he helps her stand and rushes her to the toilet. He holds her hair as she retches into the toilet and offers her a glass of water when she’s done. 

“Now I’ve ruined it” Lily sighs regretfully as she leans her cheek against the toilet seat.

“Ruined what?”

“My sexiness! This is decidedly un-sexy.”

He shouldn’t be flirting – she's drunk – but James can’t help but reassure her. “You could throw up in my toilet all day long and I’ll still think you're beautiful.”

“You would?”

“I would. But let’s talk about this tomorrow, okay? I think you could use some sleep.”

“You’re fit and nice. Do you think I could marry you someday?”

“How about we go on a sober date first,” James proposes, shoving aside the image of her in a white dress that his traitorous mind procures.

“If we must,” Lily hums, letting him pull her up. She grabs a pen off his console and – rather neatly, given how drunk she is – writes her number on his arm. “Now you can find me again!”

She looks so pleased with herself that James doesn’t remind her he only needs to walk three metres to her door. Instead, he grabs her shoes as he guides her out his door and down the hallway. When he sees her safely to bed – her eyes are already heavy – he slips out to leave her in peace. 

Damn. Her knickers.

He grins as he reaches into his pocket for his phone, typing in the numbers neatly scrawled on his arm.

James: Hi : D You left your underwear at my place…

#jily #jily fic #athenasparrow #thank you liiilyevans #athena was asked #athena's library #jple #lily evans #james potter

[maaaxx]

Heartstopper Season 2 Spoilers

Heartstopper season 2 was perfect, and Alice Oseman is a cinematic and literature genius but I would like to take a few moments to draw some attention to.....

This boy right here.

(look how sweet he is omg)

I can't get over Isaacs arch in heartstopper, especially in season 2.

Ace representation is so few and far between as it is, and good representation is even more scarce, but having that sort of representation at the forefront of a show? And having it accurately depicted, and not infantilized? Showing the complexities of it? Basically unheard of. But Holy Fuck did Alice Oseman deliver.

At the end of season 2 he is just finding out what aro/asexuality is and reading up on it. He knows it exists and he knows that it applies to him. And he faced some of the difficulties of being aro/ace with James and with the isolation and feeling like he's not interesting unless he has a romantic interest, these are all very real and not commonly talked about things that people have experienced.

And oh my god was it euphoric to see on screen.

Growing up and watching all your friends have crushes and get into relationships and fawn over people and never experiencing that same thing is so isolating. Even in accepting environments and in good friend groups (as seen on the show) it always feels like your an odd one out, and outsider, etc.

So the scene where Isaac goes "I think their might be something wrong with me.", that hits home to so many people who grew up not understanding why they were different.

I've talked about on here before why labels are so important to people, and this is a perfect example of it. You can learn to accept yourself and love yourself and be completely self confident but if there's something fundamentally different about you, there's always going to be a voice in the back of your head reminding you of that. Learning a label, or a word, that represents something that you might have already accepted as something that's a character flaw, there's no word to describe it, it's so relieving. It means there are people like you who have lived to create that label, it means your not alone with it, it means you have a community.

And having this shown on tv, especially at a time like now where people are trying to cover up anything that reminds people that LGBT people exist, is going to tell so many kids that there is nothing wrong with them, and they're not defected, and they're not broken.

And Isaacs whole arch (even thought it's not completed) handled this perfectly. Because there were moments that shows that Isaac is in some ways separate from the group. They love him, but he's different, they care about him, but he doesn't have a romantic interest, so his presence isn't as acknowledged.

And I think that in Season 3 (assuming theres going to be a season 3) we're going to get to see this expanded on. We might get to see Isaac coming out to the rest of the group, and learning how to cope with not having access to something that a lot of people say is what makes people human.

Heartstopper is such an amazing show and Alice Oseman is incredible. The cast is incredible. Everything about everything about that production is incredible.

(now for another picture of my son)

#This is a heartstopper blog now #ik heartstopper is kind of seen as a kiddy show to a lod of older gays but this show has been so healing to me #and shows like this that are very like #well known #and get a lot of views and stuff #9 cant remember the word for it rn #even though we are where we're out with the lgbt things #like i said there are a lot of people who still want to hide certain identities from kids #and asexuality is one of them #representation is so important no matter how far weve come #idk what im saying rn im so tired #anywho #i fucking love this show #isaac henderson #heartstopper s2 #heartstopper #heartstopper spoilers #max thinks shes relevant

[unohanabbygirl]

If we are talking vampire AUs for hotd/f&b then allow me to share my own headcanon. I always envision vampirism only being passed down through childbirth through a Valyrian mother. This is extremely spicy because it means that all of Rhaenyra’s children are vampires while Alicent’s are just normal blonde children. Women like Aemma and Jocelyn also need to marry Valyrian men elsewise the magic in the blood would be too weak to produce vampire children. While this lends Rhaenyra more legitimacy, lords who are strict followers of the Seven are more preferring of the targtowers. They want Targaryens and dragon riders, but without the vampirism. I just love this idea because it would mess so badly with Aemond’s sense of superiority. He would be so resentful of Alicent for not making him a true Targaryen, but also he would still be brainwashed into partially thinking vampires are a sin against the Seven and the gods want the Hightowers to cleanse the Valyrian blood of it. On the other hand, there’s no possible way that Rhaenyra’s boys aren’t confident in their own skin. No one would dare utter bastard rumors when they legit are snackin on people for three square meals a day. Vamp!Luke and Human!Aemond is something we need.

Vampirism only being passed down from a Valyrian mother is genius. It makes a lot of sense for a verity of reasons considering the instances of stillborn Targ children having various dragon like treats which leads us to believe there’s a connection between Valyrian magic and the growth of a child in the womb. It lowkey gives me twilight vibes in this scenario considering vampiric children (in this case halfbloods) needing to feed on their mothers to ensure survival along with them having the strength to break ribs! In order to survive carrying a Valyrian/vampire child the mother needs to be one herself. Hence the Targtower kids being normal everyday children with silver hair.

I also like the idea of women needing to marry other Targ men as to not weaken it as you said, but also so the magic within them isn’t too widespread. You know? Can’t have every house out here claiming that shit too, that’s when things get messy. However, houses who are dedicated to the fate think vampirism is much too evil. Something that will eventually bring about ruin and lead to a sort of armageddon if you will.

This fucks with Aemond bad! His dedication to the faith and belief that those who are true Valyrian’s/ closer to old Valyria carry this vampiric treat are constantly fighting against one another. On one hand he begins to see the truth in his Hightower side telling him he and his siblings are superior because they’re true dragon riders without all the demonic filth muddling their blood but on the other he cracks open one of those old Valyrian lore books and sees the ultimate celebration of Vampires. The celebrations and coming of age rituals those who’ve inherited Vampirism are gifted that he nor his siblings have ever been allowed to have by both his mother AND because it would be seen as disrespectful to the culture as a whole.

For this AU I imagine Luke taking Aemond’s eye actually being a situation that nearly killed him. Perhaps these vampires don’t only drink blood but eat flesh as well. Very ghoul like (Tokyo Ghoul anyone?)

Imagine, the twins throw the first punch after Aemond claims Vhagar and draw blood almost immediately which in turns sets the Velaryon boys off. The girls can hold back Jace but don’t have the man power to keep little Lucerys back from taking a chunk out of his uncle…boom no eye. The fact that Luke not only blinded him but ATE some of his flesh and blood too? Oh the obsession is 10x worse.

#asks

[thatiranianphantom]

Okay, my thoughts on the new description.

(some under a cut because, you know, it's me and I share many opinions that perhaps I shouldn't)

In the style of @raymondebidochonlifechoices's hilarious recap of RAS' interview, though perhaps a bit less hilarious.

The seventh season of Riverdale goes where no season of Riverdale has dared to go before—the 1950s!

Wonder why we've never been there before. Not because it's fucking stupid, but because it took till now for Ted Sullivan to have this absolute brainchild that will revolutionize the show.

Picking up where last season ended, Jughead Jones (Sprouse) finds himself trapped in the 1950s. He has no idea how he got there, nor how to get back to the present. 

The writers: We watch our own show, what are you talking about? We remembered that plot point, didn't we! Aren't you proud of us? Huh? Aren't you?

His friends are no help, as they are living seemingly authentic lives, similar to their classic Archie Comics counterparts, unaware that they’ve ever been anywhere but the 1950s. 

Oh rats, because typically, they are an absolute bastion of support and assistance.

Archie Andrews (Apa) is the classic all-American teen, coming of age, getting into trouble, and learning life-lessons

S1-25 year old teen - absolutely insufferable Archie is back, and this time, he's even more unaware! Hopefully with less grooming, especially from a show that is convinced it's making a profound social statement.

Betty Cooper (Reinhart) is the girl next door, starting to question everything about her perfect life—including her controlling mother Alice (Madchen Amick)

Somehow, some way, we are still circling the same plot about abusive parents. And you know how this refrain goes, people. Alice is horrendously abusive, she cries, we are supposed to forgive her. Looks like something ripped straight out of s1 but peep the absolutely no implication of anything BA related.

Veronica Lodge (Mendes) is a Hollywood starlet who moved to Riverdale under mysterious circumstances;

California and not New York???!!!! So exotic! Very wow! What an incredible stroke of genius, Roberto! They have not been shy about pumping the Varchie up, have they? It also usually only exists in addition to another ship....

Cheryl Blossom (Madelaine Petsch) is the Queen Bee with a withering wit and a secret longing

I mean, Cheryl's plot has functionally never changed, so I don't know who's shocked at this, except for maybe the writers thinking it's revolutionary to recycle Cheryl's S2 plot instead of her S1 plot. Note that Mads and Vanessa's Instagrams are and have always been a pantheon of spoilers and it does look like they're doing a lot of filming together.

Toni Topaz (Vanessa Morgan) is an activist fighting for the Black students of recently integrated Riverdale High

.....I can see my brain. I can literally see my brain, my eyes are rolling so hard. How do we make an already insufferable (my opinion, stressing that here) character even more insufferable and pretend we are making a profound social statment, something we are absolutely incapable of making? Toni is an activist for integration!

(real talk, I think we'll see very little of this plot, as we'll see very little plot for the secondary characters)

Kevin Keller (Casey Cott) is a “square” crooner wrestling with his sexual identity

Kill me now, my dear followers. And hey, spec here, I feel like Kevin may be dating Betty?

Reggie Mantle (Charles Melton) is a basketball star from farm country

The one thing I hope is true. God, I hope my dear himbo Reggie is back.

 Fangs Fogarty (Drew Ray Tanner) is a greaser who’s destined to be an Elvis-type star

Seriously, what ammunition does Drew have on the writers that he keeps getting brought back? My thought is they're going back to Kangs though, if we're going the OG way.

It isn’t until Jughead is visited by Tabitha Tate (Erinn Westbrook)—Riverdale’s Guardian Angel—that he learns the cosmic truth about their predicament.

Just....one facepalm is not enough. Five hundred facepalms are not enough. Tabitha, a character that is to put it generously not well loved and has been around for two seasons, is the Guardian Angel???

We know that they resolve Jughead remembering by the end of the premiere, per RAS, so I honestly wonder if Tabitha's role in S7 is very light. If Jughead forgets, her role is essentially moot and we have seen very little of her in BTS.

Anyway, my dear fellow sufferers, let's get through this together, one last time before we are finally set free.

#Riverdale #RD negativity

[coleoffduty]

You are a certified genius- actually- UR SO SO REAL FOR THE SONG CHOICES FOR ALICENT- THOSE 3 SONGS ARE SO PERFECT FOR HER-UR SO SO REAL FOR THAT- (also- Rhaenicent SEQUEL???? Are you telling me that there will be a sequel for them with like latest timeline with Alicent trying to sorta find herself??? IM??? SO???? *faints*)

Wait- one question, will Alicent think about releasing a song that actually is from her? like an original song that will not be altered by anyone, now that she's living for herself? or no??

Im now on the floor sobbing over it- thank you so much- Legacies altered my life and I am so inlove with how you characterize everyone!!!! and fitting the nepobaby rockstar celeb narrative with them is so fucking genius and so amazing and fits so perfectly I am actually in awe (Im too inlove with ur work im sorry abt this 😭💖)

Also when you said christian religious songs,,, the thing that popped up at the top of my head is Trisha Paytas' "I love you Jesus" 😭😭😭 IM SO SORRY FOR THIS BUT 😭😭 (Thinking of Rhaenyra trolling Alicent with that song now- actually-)

tyty, legacies alicent + voice claim mistki= agony has been sitting in my brain so i'm just happy to sort of send that out finally. as for the rhaenicent sequel, it is going to be about the current timeline but rhaenyra focused. the prequel is in alicent's perspective and so i felt it fitting for a grown rhaenyra to sort of have the narrative control after everything's that's happened between them. there's some moodboards on the whole hotd musicians series (in order too) that is on my pinterest if anyone is curious about that; link here!

also, i'm very glad and appreciative that people enjoy the legacies series/fic. i really only write what i want to see in the fandom so i'm happy other people can find that niche enjoyable as well. a mutual sent me a screenshot of a really endearing interaction on twitter about legacies and it genuinely made my night. but fyi, as much as you guys feel you might be too deep into it, just know i'm the ultimate legacies nerd with all the lore written in my notes app and physical timelines jotted down.

btw it's funny how you mention rhaenrya trolling alicent based on her religious music phase because she most definitely does when they begin their little beefing stage. alicent makes a passive aggressive comment about laenor's sexuality or the fact that the boys look a lot like harwin and rhaenyra is just like 'that's not very singing sweetheart of you' or 'didn't you sing about how the gods love all of their people? oh right, you didn't actually write your songs, my bad'. they've come a long way for sure.

#lucemond #rhaenicent #fic: legacies #offsasks

[kim-poce]

8. No God In Town: Bed Time

On Patreon (two weeks earlier release)

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The cubs stared at me for a second, looking up at the sky outside to (I supposed) be sure it was late, then they looked at each other. I wasn’t surprised when the flower cub was the one who translated those exchanges of glances to me.

“Why are you awake?” she asked, eyes wide and face full of worry. She wasn’t wearing her usual smile. This and the fact that her long wavy hair was tied up made her look really different from usual, more serious, almost angry. But that’s just me reading too much into a human cub. “It’s past your rest time, right?”

I can read worry, when it is strong enough. Yes, I did my best not to learn deeply about humans after I left my group, but I know this expression. I just know what the followers showed. I just know anger, sadness, fear and worry. Cubs shouldn’t feel worried.

“I was busy,” I said. It wasn’t a lie. “I made mattresses."

The flower cub was still worried, she opened her mouth but the cursing cub stopped her, resting a hand on her shoulder and whispering something too low for me to hear. It was only in moments like this that I remember that the cursing cub is the closest of an adult human between all the cubs. I don’t know how old she is, I'm not great at telling ages of… anything. But the flower cub was just tall enough to reach her shoulders.

“You made beds?” the cursing cub asked, washing the worry out of her face and jumping on one of the beds on the carpets, “Oh god! That’s so fucking comfortable!”

I flinched and forced myself to remember that ‘oh god’ is a common expression, not that the cursing cub is calling me god or something. I still tend to make everything about myself, even when it has been too long of a time since everything was about me.

The mint cub sat down on one bed next, and opened a big smile. It was an expression I rarely see, for a long time I didn’t even know humans could smile like that. It’s a good expression. The cub lay down and rolled over the mattress. “You are a genius in… whatever is the word for people who make beds.”

“Bed maker?” the flower cub tried.

“No, like a carpenter? bedender? Something like that,” he shrugged and kept rolling.

“I don't think that this is a word that exists,” the clapping cub said, while laying down on one bed, and taking a deep breath. “It exists now, I want this word to exist just to give it to Biggie. Biggie The Bedender!”

“Are you sure you are okay?” the flower cub asked, glancing to the sky outside once again. “Really okay?”

“I’m fine, I’m just awake,” I said. She shouldn’t worry about me. I didn’t want to be someone worthy of worrying about, I was also somewhat angry, a little afraid maybe? But angry nonetheless. Change the subject “I also brought blankets, the nights are getting colder.”

The flower cub raised her voice at that, “You went to town when I had-”

“Alice!” the cursing cub stopped her. “Thank you, Biggie, I’m not paying you for the blanket, though, nor the bed, or anything we didn't agree upon previously..”

“I’m not selling them. Did I look like I was selling them?” I asked, confused, and glad that the subject had changed.

“No, Fern is just like that,” the mint cub shrugged.

“For free, then? That’s the reason you are the fucking best!” she grinned, glancing sideways to the flower cub to say something with her eyes that I have no chance of understanding. “Don’t mind Alice too much, she is grumpy because of what happened today.”

“What happened today?”

All the cubs answered at the same time, “nothing,” “the usual,” “it’s over already anyway,” “who cares?” I decided not to ask again, it’s nothing new that the cubs are full of secrets, they never tell me anything about their lives, but again, I never tell them anything about mine. Fair enough.

“Were you waiting for us?” the flower cub asked, she didn’t seem to be willing to let go of the fact i was still awake. “because you didn’t need to.”

“I wasn’t,” I lied. If to them or to myself I don’t even know. “I was just busy and didn’t see the time, now I’m tired. I’ll go to sleep.”

I didn’t wait for them to say something before turning around and entering my room since the flower cub could bring up my resting time again. I could still hear them,  they were talking about how they will finally get to sleep comfortably. They giggled, making me smile, children didn’t- I mean back them children wouldn’t giggle or smile in front of me. Part of me wondered why the children were in my cabin, why not home where they would have beds from the beginning, why go up the mountain every night just to go down every morning?  I thought about it for a few seconds, and let go of the thought. I felt that I would find out the reason if I tried, and I decided I didn’t want to.

I woke up at the right time that morning, eight o’clock, the right time to open my eyes. Either the kids were still sleeping (improbably, for a species that does not work like a clock they do wake up about the same time every day), or they were being overly silent (also improbably. They are humans after all). I got up, put on my robe, rolled my dices, picked up the accessories and got out of the room.

“Good morning!” the flower cub said, she was smiling again. I was still thinking about the worried face, but it seemed that she wasn’t. She was sitting on one of the benches, wearing a worn out floral dress that maybe was once pink, but now was light beige. The cursing cub was tying her hair up, so for the first time I saw a pinkish scar against the pale skin of the cub’s shoulder. I almost wondered how she got it. Almost.

“Good morning,” I answered. “Where are the others?”

“Dani said he wants to hunt a bird for lunch,” the flower cub said. “And Diego went with him just because.”

I nodded.

“How do you tie your hair?” the cursing cub asked, she seemed to be struggling to braid a strand of the flower cub’s amber hair. “I mean, how do you see the part behind your head?”

“I have many, many years of practice.”

“That’s… yeah, that’s fair enough,” the cub shrugged. “I suck at it, but someone insists on asking me from all people to do that, when Diego exists.”

“Come on, it isn’t that hard.”

I ignored the talk. “Are you not going to the city today?”

“We decided to stay away from there for a few days, if you don’t mind, if you do mind we can just camp somewhere else.”

“I don’t mind,” I said too fast, before I even decided if I minded or not. “But won’t your family mind?”

The cub giggled at that, for some reason I, as usual, didn’t know.

“Oh, don’t mind about our—” the cursing cub paused to grin “—family, they won’t mind us staying away from home for a couple days. Or a couple years for that matter.”

I nodded. Humans tend to exaggerate things, I’m used to it.

“Biggie, can you help Fern to-”

“I don’t need help!” the cursing cub said, pulling a strand of hair.

“Ouch!”

“Sorry, sorry, but I still don’t need help.”

“I’m sure you don’t,” I said. “I’ll go help the other cubs.”

I left the cabin and smiled. Why I smiled? Maybe it was just a pretty day outside, a pretty day I’ll spend with the cubs. It was a good day.

—

@extemporary-username, @the-magpiesystem, @nexfox-art, @kathea, @wolfeyedwitch, @blu-jay-2779, @rose-pinkie, @latenightcupsofcoffee

#no god in town #original fiction #original writing #fantasy writing #fantasy #my writing

[lemonsbakery]

Hey uhm what are your ocs

cracking my knuckles.

CR OCS :333

Strawberry cat cookie/CC (blunt little girl with a terrible memory. needs therapy so badly)

Chocolate cat cookie/010 (mentally ill in so many ways . in a me way but I'm not like so scary)

Vanilla cat cookie (I HATE HER EVIL CAT GHOST LADY)

Cherry cat cookie (the mom of the cat triplets. People keep victimizing her even though she was also apart of the problem)

'Flour' cookie (cocaine. Father of the cat triplets. I hate him)

Dog treat cookie (SILLY SKATER LESBIAN GIRL underaged smoker and also has a crush on strawberry cat cookie in the future but cc is really fucking stupid and cant pick up on dog treat cookies obvious pickup lines)

Linzer cookie (dead military ghost lady, also known as silly lesbian emo girl)

Banana candy cookie (therapist and scientist, also known as lesbian scene girl)

Banana split cookie (eldest child of banana candy and linzer, really liked lofi, died at like um 11 or something)

Berry jam cookie (youngest child of banana candy and linzer, really liked vocaloid, died at like 9 years old)

Spritz cookie (SILLY SO SILLY SO SO SO SO SO SILLY AND COOL AND people keep watering magic down to innocent and sweet magic so much more, candy is silly but not stupid. shes a little stupid but not fucking DUMB) (also she/magic/candy pronouns for spritz thankies)

PISS COOKIE. (joke oc)

Flan cookie (HAUGHTY LOCKSMITH WHO has a little kid issue and also is sort of a roguefort fangirl but he will never admit it to anybody else)

Girl scout cookie (bothers haughty locksmith and keeps getting stuck in unconventional places, for example, inside of traffic cone and a vending machine. Also she knows Everyones home address.)

Pink grass cookie (BASED ON THOSE LIKE. UM. THOSE EGGS THAT HAD THE FLAVORED GRASS IN IT. Shes so mentally ill and um she kind of has some Serious issues with. everything oh god save her shes so fucked the religious trauma is insane)

Moose tracks cookie (47 year old single train conductor that's rivals with two other train stations but also thinks its all fun and games and loves her rivals and also will call you sweetheart, honey, and dearheart)

Microplastic cookie (wip. I am not elaborating.)

OTHER OCS :33

Mio Mirai (Girlboss v-tuber who will manipulate you and act cute while doing it)

Junichi Mirai (Brother of girlboss v-tuber. Makes really good eggs. My friends keep calling him a whore)

Grace Happyfield (Genius fucking 12 year old with cat ears and is also being raised by two maniacs that love her so much and she loves them both too. One is her mom and the other is this girl owned by my friend who taught her how to properly kill men and get away with it by being a cutie pie xx Oh and her moms a lesbian)

Alice Happyfield (GRACIES MOM!! She had her daughter kill her husband and experimented on his body. Sold the leftovers)

Harmony (I dont have a last name for her. shes 12 and had a crush on her friend who was a girl but uhoh her friend who was agirl got assassinated for being openly pansexual!!! uhoh!! shes also friends with Gracie heheohoho)

Egret Flowers (Roblox oc, really silly child that has underlying attachment and self image issues. Also she doesn't have a face)

Lilith (TMC oc, basically shes like Gabriel but instead she targets men specifically by gaining their trust and crushing them)

Alexander Weeks (FNAF oc, he's so transgender and really wants his mom dead . Btw keep in mind that he's a fnaf oc and a minor that's transgender in the 1980s)

Alex (same guy as above but make him an edgy robot that really likes cats)

Zombie cat (Read the name)

Sorrel (Epithet erased oc!! Her epithet is creativity, she basically turns fiction into reality at the expense of her own or others energy. She has no idea how to properly work it shes like 11 OH AND SHE HAS A MOTHER FIGURE THAT ALSO HAS AN EPITHET THATS MUSHROOM THEMED and and also sorrel likes baking)

Cloth (An alien that crash landed on earth. He is completely convinced that he's a human)

Ecole (An alien that crash landed on earth with cloth. She is cloths sister. shes is a famous dancer, and is on every magazine from her home planet. She wants to smack some sense into her brother)

Sew (ANOTHER ALIEN that crash landed on earth. She doesn't think she's a human or an alien, he is just himself. They also really like surfing and skating)

Doll (An old porcelain doll that was abandoned in a garden. It now tends to the plants itself since nobody else will)

MY PErSONA!! (I'm counting this as an oc because my persona has lore

theres more, but ill spare you LMSFAO

#lems ocs #save

[justyourcaffinedrivenwriterat3am]

Prompt: You can identify any lethal poison by taste.

It wasn’t meant to end this way. 

            They were kids, they were in school for the magically gifted for Christs sake, it wasn’t meant to end this way. It was the middle of an assignment, a staged dinner party, in which they had to escape the room using their powers. A brain test, to see how far they could stretch their powers. So when dinner was served, and drinks handed out, no one hesitated to drink. Until, of course, Paige dropped to the floor.

            “What the fuck is happening?” Beth screams, Lyra really just wanted everyone to shut up, they were running out of time, and no matter how much they screamed to be let out and taken to the med bay there was no one around in this block of the school. They were standard and alone, and about to die. 

            “She’s still breathing,” Lyra says, Alex is pacing in the corner of the room, addressing each and every screw in the wooden panels, as if they could just simply break out. 

            “What the fuck.” Beth says again, she had her hands in her hair and her eyes were growing a bright white, if they weren’t careful the room would catch on fire, and then they would really be fucked. 

            “Will you shut up?” Alice snaps, “it’s not going to kill her, we’re students. This is just a test.” Beth’s eyes widen. 

            “Oh that’s right, trust the nerd to trust the school, don’t you get it? We’re dead, she’s fucking dead. You fucking moron.” Beth makes gestures wit her hands against her own head, Alice draws no emotion in her face, simply flips off Beth and moves to the glass cabinet. “Real mature!” Beth screeches.

            “ENOUGH!” Alex roars, and the room freezes, Lyra still had her hand on Paige’s wrist counting her breathes and pulse. “You leave my sister alone, you keep making sure she’s alive, and Alice, I don’t think this is apart of the room, so if you could please stop acting like a sno—”

            “Oh god, she’s been poisoned.” Lyra half whispers, from her position on the floor she can see everyone freeze, Alice’s face pales and she looks to Alex and back. 

            “You’re not serious?”   

            “I can smell it.” Lyra mutters, “I can smell it on her breath.” She has to press a hand to her nose and close her eyes for a second, she can’t identify what kind of poison, but if she kept inhaling it she was bound to pass out. 

            “Okay up, up move, you’re not allowed over there anymore.” Alex has her by her arms, pulling her towards the other area of the room. She felt lightheaded. “Can you tell what it is?” She manages to shake her head and then kind of collapses onto the wooden shelf behind her. “Okay, alright.” 

            “Antidote. There has to be an antidote.” Alice was muttering, her eyes begin to glow gold as she scans the selves. “There, look.” She reaches up for a book. “An alphabetised list of poisons.” She only has to open it up to the front page before she has the whole thing memorised. 

            “So you’re telling me that this genius school, decided to willingly poison their students?” Beth says as if she can’t quite believe it. And then she laughs as if it all made sense.

            “Not the time,” Alex says, “what is it?” He asks Alice, she’s biting into her lip, and the lights around them are fading in and out, as if there is fatly wiring in the walls. 

            “I don’t, I can’t, she has the symptoms of like ten of these,” she runs a hand through her hair. “But they all have different antidotes, if I mess this up, she could die.” Lyra presses her head into her hands. This was not happening. 

            “Do we even know where the antidotes are?” Beth says, “for all we know if could be in the walls.” Alex piques at that then. 

            “Well,” Beth scrunches up her face. 

            “Not actually,” She says in disbelief. Alex begins to tap along the walls. Beth huffs and then follows suit and Alice drops to the floor to study Paige. 

            “We’re running out of time,” Lyra mutters, the lights fade in and out again. She studies them.

            “I can’t lesson the list,” Alice says, “maybe it will just be the one antidote, and we don’t have to figure it out?” The lights flash again, and Lyra gets up. The light switch was old and bronze and with a little struggle she’s able to pull it off the wall. 

            “Found them.” She says. There are ten little vials on a silver platter hidden in the wall, each named on burnt parchment. She closes her eyes before beginning to pull off her cardigan. 

            “Them?” Alice says sadly. They weren’t going to be able to figure this out. Alex rushes over to her pulling the plate out and handing them to Alice, Beth stands over the three of them on the floor book in hand trying to catch something Alice didn’t, as if that was possible. Lyra feels like a ghost. 

            “It’s not those two,” Alice says handing vials back to Alex. “But I can’t, there’s no way to tell.” She gestures at the rest of the plate, and of course there wasn’t, because without Lyra being in the room, there wouldn’t be any hope. She takes off her jumper. 

            They were all meant to use their powers after all. 

            “Beth do you have a hair tie?” 

            “What, oh, uh here.” Beth offers her wrist, still reading over the book. Lyra pulls her hair up and off her face, shakes out her hands, takes a deep breath. 

            “Look, fever stages, only five of theses have those.” Beth says. 

            “Yes but she isn’t feverish,” Alice says, Beth crouches down with the book. 

            “But she’s sweating.”

            “She’s in five layers and you’re radiating more heat then the sun, its her magic trying to cancel you out, not the poison.” Alice says. “You’re a pyro, you’re always hot.” Alice says touching Beth’s cheek quickly. The difficult part was figuring out where Paige had been sitting. There were five glasses. If she got it wrong they would try and stop her. 

            “Her breathing is dropping dangerously low,” Alex says, “Alice do something.” Lyra picks up the glass she was sure was Paige’s. Three, two, one

            She shots the rest of it. 

            “Cyanide.” She breathes out instantly, Alex’s head shoots up, her body drops. 

            “Pass me the green glass, BETH! Pass me the GREEN GLASS! We have minutes, hurry.” Her world is blurring, she feels dizzy, someone catches her. “Come on, come on come on.” Alice corks the rest of the antidote, she can barely see, she can’t really hear. “She’s alive!” 

            Her world goes black. 

#cyanide #prompt #writing #creative writing #lighting writing #prompt list #posion #love made me crazy

[bireggiemantle]

rank the rvd musicals!

1. next to normal. I think this musical fit the best thematically, and lili/madchen have some of the best voices out of the remaining cast (low bar). I think they did a pretty respectful job with the musical as well, which was something I was afraid of going into it. I like the plot of episode itself a lot too, and I think its characterization of alice is really interesting.

2. carrie! oh my god hello!!! talk about a fun episode! literally cheryl greatest hits playlist but it's just every single scene she's in this episode. she's so annoying and so mean and so so funny. the death scene was fun, but it definitely made me a little sad too. midge didn't deserve that :(

3. heathers. I have very mixed feelings on heathers as a musical, but I think it was a fun choice for the episode. also beginning the episode with the whole "are you really that miserable" scene girl hello comedic genius. I wish toni sweet pea and peaches n cream went through w that threesome though, cheryl hallucination be damned. I know in my heart that peaches n cream n sweet pea just fucked by themselves on that stage after toni left tho.

4. hedwig and the angry inch. this one was fun, but it's not my favorite. bonus points for the infamous archie gay kiss two: electric kevinaloo. and bonus bonus points for reggie's face in the background of that scene lmaooo.

#i also love that the heathers episode is so drama heavy like god the girls are fighting #and i love episodes where betty just full on accuses people of shit even if she doesnt have proof #and like yeah This Time she was right but shes usually not. and that rly adds to it to me #asks #im not a huge fan of musical episodes so none of these r personal favs of mine but i think they all have their merits

[write-orflight]

Like Real People do. Chapter 2

*Gif not mine*

Chapter 1

Rating: M, eventually will be smut.

Words: 2.1k

Warnings: Death, talk about death, Mentions of past sexual assault and kidnapping

Request: OPEN/CLOSED

A.N This is a little angsty chapter. lots of major plot details as well as mentions of assault. If that is Triggering to you i recommend skipping the first half. Also expect an update every week instead of this soon only posting this because I got inspired and finished early. much love, Cia

        Chapter 2:About that night 

“Hey dad, mom.” You said, sitting down on the cool grass, you began to pick at the blades like you did as a child as you spoke. “I know I haven’t visited in a while. In my defense, I was in school across the country, but it's not like I haven't been thinking of you guys.” You leaned back the cool marble chilling your back as well. You could practically hear your mother’s voice in your ear. 

“Ladies don’t slouch, Y/N” She’d always say, your dad would always come to your defense, “Sit however you want, Angel.” He’d say. You smiled, sadly. You missed your parents in different ways but you still missed them regardless. 

“Umm, so I suppose I should tell you guys what’s new with me.” You say. “I finished my masters, 2 actually and I uh… finished academy. I’m a profiler now at Quantico.” you winced slightly, you knew your mom would hate it, she hated when your dad was one. You couldn’t count the amount of times you hid in your room watching TV to drown out what they thought was hushed arguments. Your mom didn’t like that he wasn’t home a lot, sure but the main argument was always that she thought it was dangerous, and that he was recklessly putting their lives at risk. 

If there’s one thing your mother always was, it was right. 

“I know you guys probably wouldn’t have wanted this for me. I know mom wanted me to be a dancer despite my inability to dance.” you laughed, looking back fondly at the times you would just, for lack of a better word, flail around your childhood dance classes. “And I know dad never wanted me to know about that side of his job. But I did, and now I’m doing it and I’m happy because it’s the one place I finally feel like I fit.” You sigh. “And I’m good at it. So I feel like you guys would be proud.” You began to rattle off the details of your most recent case quietly to your dad. And how Spencer took a risk that had thankfully paid off but was terrifying in the meantime. 

“Spencer is…” You paused, trying to think of the right words to describe Dr. Spencer Reid. “... A guy. Wait, not a guy, like that. He’s a coworker, who’s a guy.” you say, fumbling and probably flushing if you could see your face. Why were you blushing? No one was here, no one alive at least. You’d known Spencer for a little over a month now and the more you spoke, the more your crush on him developed.  “He’s incredibly smart, like genius-level smart, and he’s nice. Dad, you would’ve liked him.” you felt tears coming up, as they typically did this day of the year. You stood up, placing the flowers you had purchased the day before. “I actually managed to find some good blue hydrangeas this year for you, mom.” You smiled, remembering the amount your mother would complain about how other people took care of their flowers in the neighborhood you grew up in specifically your neighbor’s blue hydrangea bush. You often found her in a rage that they were ‘practically butchering her favorite flower’  You laid the flowers down regarding your parents grave one more time. 

Alice and Noah Y/L/N

Beloved Parents and Agents. 

You stopped for hot chocolate on your way home, it always cheered you up in these winter months. Not that anything could cheer you up today but it couldn’t hurt. You made your way back to your apartment, picking up your textbook and making notes. When the words began to swim you laid down for a nap. 

You hadn’t had the dream for a while but it was never really gone. The putrid smell of the basement you were kept in, the drip of the leaky ceiling, the small sealed shut window that was your only indication that days have passed. His hands, filthy dirty hands. Always covered in soot, fingernails always dirty. He’d always come in at night, the light from the hallway being the only amount of light you’d get. Every night, he’d grab your face roughly, making you meet him in his dead eyes, and ask

“Are you going to be good for me tonight, Beloved.” 

You fought him the first couple of nights, but after a while you just let him take it. His hands always rough, pinning you, the knife pressing deep making shallow cuts in your side, the ringing of the phone 

The ringing of the phone…? 

You wake up startled, your phone is ringing. You look at the caller ID, it was Garcia. 

“Hey Garcie.” You say, sleepily, calling her by the nickname you gave her a month into knowing her. “Is there a case?” You ask. 

“Nope, sugarplum. I’m calling to ask if you wanted to come out and have a girls night. I was thinking maybe calling Prentiss and JJ, we go get drinks, have fun…” she trailed off. 

“I don’t think so, Garcia, I might just sit and watch tv tonight.” You say, being in large crowds, especially today, didn’t sound fun.  

“I know what today is, Y/N” she says, quietly. “So even if you don’t want to go out that’s fine, I’ll bring food, wine, and we can totally just sit and watch tv. But you shouldn’t be alone.” 

She was right, you knew you shouldn’t be alone. You sigh. “Only if you bring thai food and we can watch Doctor Who.” 

“Deal!” she says excitedly before hanging up. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

You and Garcia proceeded to spend most of the day watching Doctor who and laughing around Thai food. You’re halfway through the 10’s second season when Garcia gets a call. 

“What’s up, buttercup?” She says. You can’t make out the other person on the line. “I am sitting with Y/N in her apartment and we’re watching Doctor Who, can you believe she stopped watching after Nine?” 

“I got busy!” You said around your mouth full of food. 

“Hold on, I’ll ask.” Penelope says. “It’s Spencer, he wants to know if it’s ok he comes to watch with us. I’ll tell him no…” She trails off. 

“No, it's fine.” You say, nodding. “Tell him he can come.” 

“Spence, she said it’s fine. But I’d hurry up before she inhales all the Thai food.” 

“Fuck you!” you exclaim, laughing. 

You get up and head to your bathroom. You looked like you had been crying for sure. So you put some concealer under your eyes and blush on your cheeks. You look at yourself again and decide why not finish? And put eyeliner and lipgloss on. You change pajamas as well opting for shorts and a tank in case you get warm. 

You come back and Garcia is full on smirking at you. 

“What?” you ask? 

“Nothing…” She said, smirk now turned to a full grin. 

You pour more wine into your glass, feeling Garcia’s gaze still on you. You look over and you were right. She was looking at you, still smiling. 

“Alright out with it, Garcie.” 

“You like him.” She says. 

“Pardon?” You question hoping that if you act like you didn’t know what she was talking about she’d let it go. Obviously that was not the case. 

“Spencer.” She says, nonchalantly. “You like him.”

You pick up your glass. Now seemed like the best time to drink. “No, I don’t” 

Garcia scoffed. “I may not be a profiler, but I’m not an idiot.” She laughed. “I tell you Spencer’s coming over suddenly you have on full makeup.” 

“I just didn’t want to look like I was crying.” You pointed out.

“Uh-huh, and the changing into the super sexy pajama set was also so you didn’t look like you were crying?” 

You roll your eyes, continuing to eat. “It’s not sexy, it’s pajamas.” you say around your food. 

“If you say so, I think it’s cute though.” Penelope says. “You know, he asked me if you were dating anyone the other day.” 

“Really?” You said, a little too excitedly. 

“No!” She laughs. “But nice acting skills, you almost had me fooled that you didn’t like him.” 

You sit back in your seat pouting. “That’s not a nice trick to play.” 

“Oh, shut up. You’re only upset you've been had.” As if he knew you were talking about him, a knock came to the door. You both turned to look at the door neither moving to get it. “Are you going to get the door or do you want to change again.” She jokes. 

“Shut up.” you mumble before opening the door. Spencer regards you with a tiny smile clutching his messenger bag. “Hey, Spencer.” You smiled moving to the side, letting him in. Garcia greets him too, patting the seat next to her in the middle of the couch. He sits his bag down before joining her. You return to your seat at the end immediately pulling your legs under you turning your attention to the TV. You feel eyes on you so you turn only to lock eyes with Spencer. He flushes immediately before awkwardly clearing his throat and turning toward the screen. Weird… you think. 

The three of you watch a couple more episodes, at some point the Thai food is put away and replaced with popcorn. You’re laughing so much you almost forget what today is. 

Almost. 

Eventually, Garcia stands. “Well lovelies, I have an early day tomorrow. So I’m going to head out.” 

Spencer moves to stand too. “Guess I’ll head out too.” 

“No!” Garcia all but shouts. “Don’t stop on my account. You guys seem like you’re having fun.” She says. If you weren’t glaring at her before it was full on daggers now she was obviously trying to set you up. 

“If I’m not putting you out, Y/N.” 

“Never Spencer, I like hanging out with you.” You add. God, I sound lame. You think. But you instantly lose that thought when a bright smile crosses his lips. You can’t help but look and smile back. A throat being cleared brings you both back. 

“I’m going to go.” Garcia says, smiling at you both. She hoped you guys figured it out you could be good for each other. “I’ll see you at work.” 

“Bye Garcie! Thanks for today.” You call out to her, watching to make sure she got to her car safe. You turn back to Spencer. “Next Episode?” You ask, he nods furiously. 

You’re about halfway through the second episode you’ve watched with just Spencer and you can’t help but be hyper aware of your body right now. Spencer was still so close, seated in the middle of your couch instead of the end where Garcia had been. You took in his relaxed frame, the furrow that was normally in his brow was almost entirely gone, his sharp jaw finally slack. You find yourself looking at his mouth for a while, he had such a pretty mouth, soft pink lips that you couldn’t help but wonder what they felt like, what they tasted like-- 

That thought was dashed short when you saw his eyes back on you. You flush looking into his eyes. 

“You didn’t come to work today.” He says. 

“I did not.” 

“Hotch said it was a personal day.”

“It was.” You sighed. You knew someone would eventually ask about it, you worked with profilers, you're sure most of them deduced why you took a personal day even if they didn’t know the whole truth.   

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks. He’s offering you an out, you decide not to take it.         

“It’s been 11 years since my parents died today.” You say. “You’d think it’d get easier by now but it really really doesn’t.” You sigh. 

Suddenly you felt arms around you. Spencer was hugging you tightly and that was enough to break the dam you thought you had closed before. You began clutching on to him sobbing giant messy cries into his shoulder. He rubs your back in smooth circles whispering it’s ok until he notices you calm. He still didn’t release his hold in you so now you were laying in his arms, head resting on his shoulder. ”You didn’t have to do this.” you say “I know you’re a germaphobe.” 

“Yea to strangers, Y/N.” He points out. “Not to you, you’re my friend. I’m always going to try to protect you.” He says, smoothing your hair from your face. The action itself was so fond it hurt you. And while the friend comment stung a little you couldn’t bring yourself to care because right now even if it was just for the night you were in Spencer Reid’s arms. And you felt safe. 

“Can we finish Doctor Who now?” You inquire, not moving from your spot, practically burying yourself into Spencer’s shoulder.  

“Of course.” He says pressing play. You stay like that, pressed tightly together until David Tennant’s voice and Spencer body warmth lure you into slumber. 

 Taglist:    @haylaansmi​     @yoruebeautiful​ @kianagilder-blog​ @l0ve-0f-my-life​ @bihoeofmanyfandoms

#spencer x reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer x you #spencer reid x you #criminal minds #bau x reader #spencer x reader smut #spencer reid x reader smut

[ourimpavidheroine]

You always post your writing soundtracks. Mind sharing your top ten albums with us?

I actually laughed when I read this because I’m thinking of the Anon who complained that all of my music was OLD. I mean. I’m old! What did you expect?

Never mind me, I’m easily amused. Thank you for using the word album so I would not feel like Lady Danbury with my lethal cane.

Yes, sure I can do that! I don’t know that these are my forever and ever amen top ten, but they are the ones that are coming to mind right now. So.

Under a cut, it’s long. 

In no particular order.

Brutal Youth - Elvis Costello

My ex-husband was in love with Elvis Costello and who could blame him? The man is a genius lyricist. This is not one of his more commercially popular albums but I love every single track. (I also lined up at Ticketmaster in Oakland, CA when the man was touring in order to get tickets for my ex. I got there at midnight and spent the night, meeting a group of drag queens who were getting tickets to see Barbara Streisand. God, that was a fun night, we ate donuts one of them went on a donut run for and sang showtunes for hours. One of my favorite memories.) This verse, from Clown Strike, is one that has resonated with me since I first heard it.

Tell me what you want of me Or are you terrified of failure? You put on a superstitious face Behind all this paraphernalia We're not living in a masquerade Where you only have three wishes It isn't easy to see In a lifetime of mistaken kisses

Unrepentant Geraldines - Tori Amos

I remember the first time I heard a Tori Amos song. It was the summer directly after I’d graduated from college, I was driving my ex-husband’s car and Silent All These Years came on the radio and I was just fucking gobsmacked. I bought Little Earthquakes that day and haven’t looked back. I have all her albums. I am a big, big fan.

Unrepentant Geraldines, though. God. It came out the year before my wife died and it got me through her death. The song Weatherman is about a man losing his wife, and how he sees her in the nature surrounding him. 

And. 

No, sorry, I can’t write more about this, not right now. But I sing it to her sometimes. 

He is not a weatherman But his bride lies with the land And she will whisper to him I'll be dressing up in snow Cloaked in echo it's almost As if only Nature knows How to paint his wife to life With every season's tone "One more look from her eyes One more look can you paint her back to life"

Ray of Light - Madonna

This album got me through my divorce from my ex-husband. I’d go out every single day during my lunch hour, this on my walkman, and walk and walk and walk until I got myself in enough control to go back and finish my work day. It’s a great album and I still listen to it a lot. It empowers me. And then my daughter was born and Ray of Light has always been her song to me, even though that wasn’t the song on the album that Madonna herself wrote for her daughter.

Faster than the speeding light she's flying Trying to remember where it all began She's got herself a little piece of heaven Waiting for the time when Earth shall be as one And I feel like I just got home And I feel And I feel like I just got home And I feel

Seven and the Ragged Tiger - Duran Duran

This one was a difficult choice. For one thing, I really love their album Big Thing, which almost nobody’s heard about but one I love deeply. This one though...I think it’s the memories, including going to see them at the Oakland Coliseum with my cousin during their tour for this album and finding out they were partially filming the video for The Reflex that night. I like to think of us as being one of those girls in the audience. (Although I wasn’t screaming. I am a Capricorn. Have some dignity.) Duran Duran were responsible for my first fanfic and I’ve had a love for them since my Dad bought me their first album for my 13th birthday. I am nothing if not loyal. I have all of their early albums, all of their 12″ singles, too, including Secret Oktober, which I have always loved with a passion.

Also, Roger Taylor can still get it.

Freefall on a windy morning shore nothing but a fading track of footsteps Could prove that you never been there Spoken on a cotton cloud like the sound of gunshot taken by the wind And lost in distant thunder racing on a shining plain And tomorrow you'll be content to watch as the lightning plays along the wires and you'll wonder

Touch - Eurythmics

Another band I still love and listen to on the regular. Annie Lennox could sing me the telephone book and I’d be thrilled. Seeing her at age 14 in the Sweet Dreams video for the first time in my Grandmother’s living room quite literally woke something in me that led to moving across the world for a woman years later. (GOD.) I have all of their albums and choosing a favorite is difficult but this one won by a narrow margin, if only for the song Regrets, which is one of the songs that describes me until I became a mother, really. Like I RESONATED with that song. Still does in certain ways, if I am being truthful to myself.

I've got a delicate mind I've got a dangerous nature And my fist collides With your furniture I've got a delicate mind I've got a dangerous nature And my fist collides With your furniture I'm an electric wire And I'm stuck inside your head

Combat Rock - The Clash

Ah, teenage Impavid first understanding that music can also be political. Listen, I didn’t know much about what was going on outside of my own miniscule sphere - I was young and the internet didn’t exist yet. We got what news we got from our local paper and TV stations and they weren’t really reporting on what was happening in the world, not in 1982, let me fucking assure you. I got this album because my Dad was a part time DJ at a radio station that played mostly country music and the general manager of the station would just toss the rest of the non-country albums they’d get as promotions. My Dad would bring them home to me to listen to. You can imagine thirteen year old me listening to this album that opened with “This is a public service announcement - with guitars!” going WHAT THE FUCK? Let me just say there were a lot of trips to the library to read various newspapers after that.

Not to mention Rock the Casbah. What was a muezzin? I had no idea. I spent half a year reading books about Islam, about the Middle East and Northern Africa, which led to a curiosity about other religions beyond the Roman Catholicism in which I’d been raised, about other cultures as well. This album and The Color Purple by Alice Walker were the two things in my teen years that woke me the fuck up.

Now the king told the boogie men You have to let that raga drop The oil down the desert way Has been shakin' to the top The sheik he drove his Cadillac He went a' cruisin' down the ville The muezzin was a' standing On the radiator grille

Synchronicity - The Police

This fucking album. This fucking album. This album reached deep down into me and pulled out my soul and kicked it around for awhile. Every single song on this album hit me like a brick wall. Still does. Most likely always will.

Listen, you either like King of Pain or you live it. There’s no in between.

There's a little black spot on the sun today It's the same old thing as yesterday There's a black hat caught in a high tree top There's a flag pole rag and the wind won't stop I have stood here before inside the pouring rain With the world turning circles running 'round my brain. I guess I'm always hoping that you'll end this reign, But it's my destiny to be the king of pain...

Sign O’ The Times - Prince 

The soundtrack to my University days. Jesus, it starts out with “In France a skinny man died of a big disease with a little name,” and it just keeps going. Pain, sex, wonder, glory, politics, love. It’s all there. I wore the vinyl out on this one. Amazing, amazing album. In fact, I still play it so often my kids practically know it by heart, and they don’t even like Prince!

To this day I think If I Was Your Girlfriend is the sexiest song ever written.

I will tell you this much: Sayuri’s main writing soundtrack song is Starfish and Coffee off the album, the same song I used to sing my kids as a lullaby. This should tell you a lot about her.

Cynthia wore the prettiest dress With different color socks Sometimes I wondered if the mates where in her lunchbox Me and Lucy opened it when Cynthia wasn't around Lucy cried, I almost died, U know what we found? Starfish and coffee Maple syrup and jam Butterscotch clouds, a tangerine And a side order of ham If U set your mind free, honey Maybe you'd understand Starfish and coffee Maple syrup and jam

Nina Simone Sings The Blues - Nina Simone

This was one of my Daddy’s albums. He loved it and so did I. As a child I just loved the sound of her voice - something in it both soothed me and pulled at me, made me want to run and just keep running. She still makes me feel like that. If you don’t know Nina Simone I urge you to change that, right now. There’s nobody at all like her. She’s irreplaceable. All of her material is good, not just her blues songs. Not to mention, she was an absolute brilliant genius at the piano, never mind the strength she had as a Black woman in a time when doors were shut in her face on a daily basis. Seriously. Read about her.

When I became a woman, of course, her songs took on a much deeper meaning for me, one that I could relate to. Isn’t that the hallmark of a good album, though? One that stays with you and changes with you? I think so.

If you’ve never heard her cover of I Put A Spell On You then do yourself a favor and go right now and listen. You’re welcome.

Oh and Buck from this album? Nuo to Wing, right there.

Also one of the sexiest songs ever written, this one. Especially how she sings it. The Hot Frenchman (have I ever told you about The Hot Frenchman? no? OH BOY THERE’S A STORY) told me he thought it was about drugs and I was like, honey, this tells me a whole lot about you, more than you probably wanted it to.

I want a little sugar In my bowl I want a little sweetness Down in my soul I could stand some lovin' Oh so bad I feel so funny and I feel so sad I want a little steam On my clothes Maybe I can fix things up So they'll go Whatsa matter Daddy Come on, save my soul I need some sugar in my bowl I ain't foolin' I want some sugar in my bowl

I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got - Sinéad O’Connor

This is a beautiful album, full of pain and joy, her hallmark. She sings every single word with everything in her; she’s far too intense for many, many people (and while she’s been open with her mental health struggles I’ve often wondered if she isn’t somewhere on the spectrum as well) but never for me. Her raw honesty has always appealed to me. She’s political, she’s a lover, a mother, a survivor of horrific abuse, someone who keeps reinventing herself as a way to find her way through pain. I always feel, when I am listening to her music, that I am bearing witness. I’m not afraid of pain; I’ve survived it as well. This album, one of her oldest, is still my favorite.

The line “You used to hold my hand when the plane took off” is the most evocative lyric I have ever heard with regards to the ending of love. It’s a punch to the heart - she felt it and she shared it with us, her fragile heart in her palms. Oh, Sinéad.

This is the last day of our acquaintance I will meet you later in somebody's office I'll talk but you won't listen to me I know what your answer will be I know you don't love me anymore You used to hold my hand when the plane took off Two years ago there just seemed so much more And I don't know what happened to our love

#personal #favorite albums #long post #Anonymous

[megalony]

Heartbeat- Part 7

Here is the latest part of my dad! Ben Hardy series which I hope you are all enjoying, any feedback is always lovely.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogermeddow @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh

Series taglist: @ispewglitter​

Series masterlist

Summary: Ben and (Y/n) haven’t been together long when they find out their pregnant. But (Y/n) fears she’ll lose the baby after suffering miscarriages before with her ex, Gwilym who is making things complicated.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You know we don't have to go today, don't you?" Ben pulled a light cream shirt over his head before his eyes focused back on (Y/n) who was stood in front of the mirror. He didn't want her to think that they had to go out to dinner with his parents today, they could always say no.

"No, we're going, she's just a bit restless today." (Y/n) locked eyes with Ben through the mirror as she tied her hair up to keep it out of her eyes but she could see he didn't look convinced. She wanted to go out today, Ben's parents hadn't seen him in a while because he'd been busy it wouldn't be fair to cancel on them now. The baby was just being restless and (Y/n) didn't feel amazing but she wasn't expecting to feel perfect right now. Her back ached, she had a headache and her stomach was tense from their girl wriggling around all night but she would be fine to go out for a few hours.

"You sure? You didn't sleep last night and you don't look that well." Ben walked over to where (Y/n) was standing and looped his arms around her waist. He was smiling but his eyes were full of concern, she looked rather pale and tired, he didn't want (Y/n) to think that they had to go out if she didn't feel up to it.

"Thanks. But I'm okay, I just need a drink and something to eat plus your mum has been waiting ages to see you again so we're going."

"Alright, your the boss." Ben wasn't going to argue it because he knew this wasn't something that he was going to win. He leaned his head at an angle so he could press his lips to her neck causing (Y/n) to smile tiredly. She wanted to go out and she was hungry, staying home wouldn't be very fun and she wasn't sick so there was no point blowing off dinner today. "Someone's happy today." He murmured quietly against her neck before he pressed his hand a bit firmer against the base of (Y/n)'s stomach when he felt a few kicks to his palm.

"She's been happy all night." (Y/n) leaned her head against Ben's for a few moments before she patted his hand and motioned for them to start moving. They had to get going soon if they didn't want to be late for dinner.

(Y/n) rubbed her hand over her stomach a few times when they headed downstairs to get ready. It was such an amazing feeling to finally be able to feel a baby moving and kicking after never getting this far before but now it was like fate was making it up to (Y/n) for all the chances she had missed out on this feeling. Their girl hadn't stopped moving and kicking all night, it was a surreal feeling that (Y/n) knew she would never get used to.

"Alright, if you're sure then let's go before mum calls asking where we are." Ben checked his phone before he stuffed it into his pocket, he knew what his mother was like. If they were two minutes late she would start to get annoyed and panicked and would ring asking if they were on their way or not or if they had forgotten. She was a very punctual person.

"You know she'll end up calling anyway to make sure we're still coming."

The moment they got in the car, (Y/n) tried to keep her back straight to stop it from seizing up and to try and see if sitting straight made her feel a bit more at ease. She pulled down her sleeves over her hands to stop her from biting her nails that had gotten rather short lately and leaned her head against the window for a while. (Y/n) had never really been a fan of long drives and she knew it would take just over half an hour to get to the restaurant to meet Ben's parents. Being in the car for too long gave (Y/n) a headache and made her feel uneasy but they had only been in the car for ten minutes now and she already felt uneasy.

Closing her eyes, (Y/n) tried to listen to the music playing on the radio but it didn't do very much to make her feel any better. She smoothed her hand over her stomach for a few moments before switching and rubbing at her eyes, she didn't know what to do or how to make herself feel any better. She didn't want to turn up to dinner looking like she was ill and sleep deprived.

"Baby, you okay?" Ben turned his head to the right to look over at (Y/n) when he kept catching her shifting around out the corner of his eye like she couldn't get comfy or felt uneasy.

Ben's eyes flickered between the road and (Y/n) for a few seconds but he almost jumped out of his seat when he caught her suddenly jerk forward like she'd been asleep and was shocked awake. His hands tightened on the steering wheel when (Y/n) braced one hand on the door and her other hand pressed to her stomach.

"Stop the car."

"What- why? What's wrong?!" Ben looked back at the road to stop himself from swerving to the side but he couldn't concentrate on the road ahead for more than two seconds before his head turned back in (Y/n)'s direction. He didn't know what was wrong, she seemed uncomfy in her seat and then the next moment she jumped forward like she'd heard a gunshot. He would pull over if she wanted but he had to know what was happening.

"Pull over! It hurts, it r-really hurts." (Y/n) tipped her head down until her chin tucked into her chest like she was trying to pull in on herself and see if it would make her feel any better but she knew it wouldn't.

(Y/n) tried to take deep breaths but it was hard to control her breaths when her stomach suddenly felt like it was twisting itself into knots that she couldn't untangle. She felt the car come to an abrupt stop but (Y/n) couldn't open her eyes or turn her head to look over at Ben, she felt like if she just stayed tucked up like this then the pain might go away and she might somehow feel better.

"(Y/n), what's wrong? Please talk to me I don't know what the fuck to do." Ben tangled one hand in his hair that he pulled on until it felt like a chunk of hair was going to come loose between his fingers. He moved his other hand to rest on (Y/n)'s back but he didn't know how to comfort her or what he was supposed to do when she wasn't talking to him. It didn't take a genius to guess that the problem was her stomach and that frightened the life out of him but her not talking made Ben feel worse.

It felt like forever had passed before (Y/n) slowly tried to straighten up instead of leaning over like she was about to fall into the foot-well but a sudden groan left her lips and Ben could see tears falling from her eyes.

"No... oh no! I- I think my w-water broke!" (Y/n) kept her right hand pressed to her stomach like she was willing the baby to stay right there but her other hand lashed out and smashed into the dashboard before she bowed her head and let out a choked cry. They had roughly seven weeks or more left until they would be at full term and (Y/n) had been praying non-stop that they could get to thirty seven weeks because that meant they wouldn't be at risk of any premature labour or problems that came with it. If they got to thirty seven weeks it would mean that their girl would be healthy and have a good fighting chance of nothing or very little being wrong with her.

"Hey, hey don't do that." Ben kept his left hand on (Y/n)'s back but he reached over with his other hand and quickly grabbed her hand so she wouldn't try and punch the dashboard again. He knew she was in pain but inflicting more pain onto herself wasn't going to make her feel any better or make this easier.

(Y/n) didn't respond but she let Ben pull her back until she was sitting properly in the seat and not hunched over. She pressed her head back into the headrest but all she wanted to do was lash out and kick around and hit something because this wasn't fair. God had something against (Y/n) wanting a baby and he had made it so, so hard for her to get this far and now this was going to be it. (Y/n) didn't mind being punished, she had clearly done something wrong to warrant all her failures at being a mother but now their baby was being punished too.

"We're going to the hospital and I'll call mum on the way and tell her what's happening but remember what the midwife said, this could happen but you're not in labour yet. They might be able to hold off labour for a few days yet."

Ben hurried to get his phone out his pocket and he put it on his leg as he started the car up again. He rang his mum and put it on speaker as he turned around and started to head in the other direction to go to the hospital.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Okay, how are we doing in here?"

(Y/n) and Ben both turned their heads to look towards the door when their usual midwife, Alice, walked through the door with a calming smile that wasn't helping (Y/n) very much. Nor was the question she asked which she had to already know the answer for by now. This was not a situation that they wanted to be in and therefore they weren't going to be very happy about it.

"Not good, they've given me steroids b-but you said I'm not in labour." (Y/n) rubbed quickly at her eyes to try and stop herself from crying because her headache was far worse from the tears she had already shed. She didn't want to sit and cry like this but she didn't know what else to do.

They had been here for an hour now and after being assessed Alice said that they weren't in labour yet. But a nurse had put (Y/n) on a drip and on steroids and the steroids implied that they thought she was going to be in labour very soon because they were preparing for when the baby was born.

(Y/n) saw the look Ben was giving her and the way he was biting his lip to try and stop himself from frowning or even crying but she couldn't help it. She felt like they were tiptoeing around her and pretending everything was fine when it wasn't.

"(Y/n), at the moment you're not in labour but we have to take everything into account and the steroids are a precaution." Alice walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed but she could see her words weren't helping and she wished there was something else that she could say which would make them feel better. They had all expected something like this to happen, they had talked it over and right now the best thing to do was to take every precaution and prepare for when (Y/n) did go into labour because it was evidently going to be soon.

"How long do we have to wait then?" (Y/n) bit down on her lower lip until she could taste blood in her mouth but it didn't stop her lips from curving down at the corners or stop her eyes from beginning to well up with tears. (Y/n) knew the outcome of this, she lost a lot of amniotic fluid and that was going to unsettle the baby and if she had more contractions she was eventually going to go into labour. There was no chance of her being able to stay in hospital for a few days or even a week before labour started. It was going to start soon and (Y/n) would rather not play the waiting game when it was never going to last.

"I don't know, honey. Hours, a day, two days, it isn't up to us and we can't give you a time scale. With your previous miscarriages, it was clear that you wouldn't get to full term, having miscarriages makes the odds higher that you'll go into very premature labour. Nothing has to be wrong for that to happen it was expected and I am sorry about that. With you losing your amniotic fluid we've put you on steroids to try and speed up the development of the baby's lungs so she'll be more prepared when she's born."

It was like an unspoken rule that (Y/n) was never going to get to full term or even to thirty seven weeks. Her track history meant that getting this far was a miracle and miscarrying more than once normally led to very premature delivery before thirty four weeks.

(Y/n) had achieved getting to thirty three weeks already and getting this far meant their girl would be a bit more developed and healthier than if she was born a few weeks earlier.

There wasn't very much that (Y/n) could say in response to that so she opted for staying quiet and looking at her hands which were locked together with Ben's very tightly. It felt like she had done something wrong or that she had failed when she knew she wasn't expected to get much further than this point in the pregnancy. Alice had given her a few extra scans and checkups and prescriptions to try and prepare for something like this happening but it still made (Y/n) feel like she failed. She wanted to exceed their expectations, she wanted to make it to thirty seven weeks and give their daughter a better chance, but she couldn't.

"Do you want me to talk you both through what happens when you go into labour?"

Ben looked at (Y/n) for a moment before nodding when she stayed quiet, he could tell she was being silent because if she spoke she would only want to snap and make a rude remark and it wasn't Alice's fault they were here. (Y/n) knew they had to be talked through it very soon because she wasn't going to be pregnant for much longer.

"Okay, well for now you'll be monitored every hour or so to make sure you're still in a stable condition. If your contractions come back and you go into labour you'll be given an injection to make sure her lungs will be prepared for when she's born. If anything happens or she's distressed you might have to have a C-section, but you might sail through. Or, if she becomes distressed anytime before labour a C-section might be an option for her best interests. When she's born she'll be in the ICU, we will check her lungs and her heart for any problems but chances are she will just need a few weeks in an incubator. Does that sound okay?"

(Y/n)'s eyes were tired and bleak and she looked away before she dared nod her head in response. It had to sound okay, that was the plan of action, nothing could be done or changed to it because it was procedure. No matter how many times (Y/n) complained or said she didn't want to go into labour or have a C-section, no one could change that because this was how things were going to plan out.

She just hoped things would work in their favour and make sure their baby girl would be okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I know you don't believe me, but she's gonna be okay." Ben smoothed his thumb over the back of (Y/n)'s hand as he hunched over slightly in his seat to be more level with (Y/n). He knew she wasn't going to truly believe his words even if they managed to calm her down a little, but that was okay. He wanted to try and calm (Y/n) down because the worry was pooling in her eyes and it made Ben's heart drop to his stomach.

"She'd be better if I could hang on a few more weeks, maybe a few more days at least." (Y/n) looked down at Ben's hand and slowly traced the pad of her finger over his knuckles where the skin was dry and slightly cracked in places. She couldn't look him in the eyes as she spoke because she knew he wouldn't agree with what she was saying which made sense to her.

(Y/n) didn't care if their girl might be fine when she was born, (Y/n) cared that if she could only hold off labour for another few weeks then their girl would be perfect. She would be fine and healthy and in no danger like she was now.

"She might have been better in a few weeks but that doesn't mean she won't be alright now. You got her this far when you kept saying you wouldn't get past twenty four weeks."

"I wanted the doctors to find something."

"What do you mean, baby?" Ben leaned his head a bit closer to (Y/n) and moved his free hand to tilt her chin up so she was looking at him. She was laid on her side on the bed with her knees curled up to her stomach like she wanted to go to sleep but was too riled up to dare think about sleep.

"I think if... if I knew what was wrong with me, it might be easier to accept that I shouldn't be a mother. Other women know, they get told that their tubes are blocked or their cervix is too small or they just can't support a baby to full term. Wouldn't knowing something like that be easier than being told your fine but can't do it anyway?"

Ben looked away for a moment, rubbing at his jaw as he felt the tears starting to fall down his features.

(Y/n) wanted to be told something was wrong with her because that would be easier to cope with. Other women got told why they couldn't have a baby or why they kept miscarrying and even though it would be hard knowing something was wrong with her, (Y/n) knew it would be easier. She felt like she was running a marathon. She was a runner in the race and everyone kept telling her she was fine but she couldn't keep up with everyone else and kept falling. There was no reason why she couldn't carry a baby but her body just didn't seem to want to do it no matter what her heart and mind said.

"I think that would be easier, baby, it would probably put your mind at ease. But does it matter now if there may be something wrong or not? We're having a baby girl soon and even if you can't get to full term, you've made it so that she will be okay if she's born now. Once she's here, will it matter if there was ever something wrong?"

It may be easier to know for certain that something might be wrong but Ben knew that once they had their baby, it wouldn't matter. (Y/n) wouldn't need or have the urge to find out if something was wrong because she would have the baby she'd always yearned for. Knowing what was wrong wouldn't make any difference to (Y/n) because she wouldn't need to know.

If she never had a baby then knowing would be the one thing (Y/n) wanted in life. She would want to know what was holding her back from being a mother and stealing that chance away from her. But whatever the reason, it hadn't held her back anymore.

"It might matter to her because I haven't looked after her-"

"No, no it won't. Why would she be upset when she'll know you love her and look after her with everything you have?"

(Y/n) managed a small smile when she felt Ben reaching over to gently graze his free hand over her stomach like he was reassuring her that it would be okay and the baby was never going to care about this chat. Moving her hand, (Y/n) brought Ben's and closer until she could press their hands to her chest, tucked under her chin like she wanted to keep them safe.

Silence fell around them for a few minutes, nothing else needed to be said for the time being and the silence was nice. They had been here for six hours now and had been going in periods of a lot of talking and then dipping into silence.

The silence felt nice, it felt calming and comforting because there was no one rushing around, no one shouting orders or trying to calm everyone down and say what was going on. It gave them both time to just sit and think and there was nothing they had to say right now. (Y/n) could have almost fallen asleep with the silence if it weren't for the hundreds of thoughts running around in her head.

(Y/n) could almost feel her eyes starting to close, but they opened rather suddenly and locked with Ben when a noise hit her ears. She watched Ben straighten up in his seat but the look in his eyes showed he didn't know what the noise was or what it meant either.

Moving her arm, (Y/n) pushed herself up so she was leaning up on her hand rather than laying on her side but her head turned to look at the door when Alice and another midwife suddenly hurried into the room.

"What's wrong?"

"Alright, (Y/n) can you lay back down on your left side please?"

(Y/n) could hear the heartbeat monitor picking up and she could feel her heart hammering in her chest because something clearly wasn't right. She slowly laid back down on her side again when Alice rested a hand on her shoulder to urge her to do so. Her eyes locked with Ben who seemed perplexed, unsure whether to stay sat where he was or to get up and do something or move out the way but he seemed frozen to the spot.

"It can't be labour, I- I'm not having contractions." (Y/n) moved her hand to her stomach like she was reassuring herself she wasn't in any pain. She wasn't on painkillers or any meds other than steroids and an IV drip so if (Y/n) had contractions she would know about it. And she felt fine, nothing felt wrong or off she felt better than she did earlier today.

"No, you're not in labour, the baby seems to be distressed, her heartbeat is getting too low most likely from the lack of fluid. We're going to have to do an emergency C-section."

"Ben..."

"Hey, it's okay I promise. She's coming now and she's gonna be fine and looked after, it's okay." Ben's voice was soothing and when he leaned over to kiss her temple he moved his hand to hold hers again but they were both shaking.

(Y/n) snapped her eyes closed and tilted her head down to stop a groan or a whimper from leaving her lips. This was the kind of luck (Y/n) just knew she was bound to get. She wasn't in labour, she was fine herself but now their baby girl was getting distressed and it was (Y/n)'s fault. Her body was pushing for labour and now she was making the baby unsettled and in danger.

If they tried to give the baby something to calm her down or pick up her heartbeat they could overwhelm her and if they didn't give her anything and just waited her heartbeat could stop and they could lose her.

She had to be born now.

#ben hardy #ben x reader #ben hardy imagine #imagine #BoRhap #gwilym lee #dad! ben #heartbeat

[shinymooncolor]

Hi 💖💖

@lumosinlove is amazing. Sweater Weather is amazing. This chat and this blog and Olli and me love you all and we’re proud allies and everyone deserves to be happy and be themselves.

Here’s a little, short chat for you all. @frombeauxbatons helped me with a lot of ideas for this one 😍

I know this might not be totally realistic but. Heck, it’s fiction. 💜🖤🤍

Tried something new. So - the last part is a live interview during broadcast. All comments and thoughts and criticism welcome 😇 if you like it, I’ve got another chat for that...

So, sweater weather chat #13

Finn has a vision. And no one understands him. Sergei yells. Dumo and Sunny are pranksters. Kuny wants more lions. Olli is a good boy. The girls are proud of their boys. So much glitter.

—

Saturday 9.22 pm

Prongstar: sooo. Finn just got kicked out from the Arena by Alice. Hahahahah poor baby. He’s almost crying.

Siriusly: what happened?

DumoDad: apparently Finn’s vision was not welcomed by Alice and her team. 😂

CarbO’Hara: THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEY ARE DOING. I AM AN ARTIST AND THEY ARE SILENCING MY GENIUS

CarbO’hara: she’s mean. I was just giving some constructive criticism. 😣

Newt-leo: I’ve decorated a room with you. I have to side with Alice on this one.

Ollibear: you made one of the interns cry Finn. 🥺

CarO’Hara: HOW HARD IS IT. Certain colours match. Some don’t. It’s just stupid. I could’ve decorated that arena and the locker room way better.

Nadotheman: You’re not decorating my stall. Alice promised we could each decorate our own. Don’t you try and go pridezilla on us now.

Logantremblayzzz: leave us out. Finn is a nightmare when it comes to aestethics… you’d think he was a goalie…

Blizzard: HEY

Newt-leo: HEY

Sunnysideup: ohhh someone is on the couch tonight 😜😜😜😜

Sergei_81: I decorate my stall. Stay away.

RussianGod: I want more lions. I only got little lion. 😳

Siriusly: I get most lions. I’m captain.

Timmyforrealz: OLLI HAS 8 LIONS?!?!?!?

Ollibear: don’t you dare touch them. I will make you regret it

Nadotheman: how come you get 8???? She said there was only a certain amount

Siriusly: because no one can not crumble when Olli turns on the puppy eyes. Also everyone in the front office loves him. He never causes trouble, rarely fights and he’s just a good boy.

Ollibear: you know I’m older than you right?

DumoDad: you’re still a good boy, Olli!

Ollibear: this is weird. But I’ll take the praise.

—

Sunday 8.22 am

Blizzard: SERGEI IS YELLING AT KUNY IN THE LOCKER ROOM!!!!!

Prongstar: be right there

Siriusly: I don’t understand russian. But it sounds bad @sunnysideup

Talkiewalkie: why is his hair blue?

Blizzard: all I gathered was something something prank something something castrate something something blue

TalkieWalkie: ohhhh. Apparently someone put blue dye in Sergei’s shampoo… Oh this is fucking golden. Who came up with that 😍

Ollibear: why is he yelling at Kuny about it?

Sunnysideup: he thinks Kuny did it, Kuny claims he was framed… OH that was something about mothers. Ouch

Timmyforrealz: russian is so much cooler when cursing people 😉

Nadotheman: the blue suits him though. Makes him look younger

Newt-leo: you’d think Kuny would try to hide behind someone bigger?

Blizzard: No it’s a lot funnier this way. Poor Logan to be caught in the middle of it though 🙈

CarbO’Hara: I like how our resident gigantic enforcer is using Logan as a human shield.

Ollibear: you’re not going to rescue him? Not very chivalrous

Newt-leo: he can handle himself. Also it’s funny to see Kuny trying to hide behind him…

Blizzard: Who did come up with it? @prongstar?

Prongstar: shit I don’t have the balls to prank Sergei… Have you seen his uppercuts?

DumoDad: @sunnysideup?

Sunnysideup: 😇😇😇😇 hehehehe hehehehe ask dumo....

Nadotheman: should I rescue kuny? He’s my ride today after all. Dolores is at the car doctor. And we’re raising a cat together

LeWilliam: maybe someone distract Sergei… I’m scared…

DumoDad: Olli can do it. He loves Olli.

Ollibear: cowards. And of course he loves me. I’m the only sane one on this team.

——

Sunday 9.53 am

NatALLY: OH MY GOD!!! LOOK AT ALL THESE RAINBOWS

GingerLily: I love it! It’s adorable. Also, have you seen Finn, Logan and Leo’s jerseys?

Anyaismyname: that is cute.

Celeste: Anya… Is Sergei’s hair blue?

Linnea: yes it is. Because my idiot husband thought it was funny. And apparently he framed some of the younger boys…….

Celeste: why do I have a feeling Pascal is part of this?

Linnea: because we can’t leave them alone for 5 minutes?

Anyaismyname: they asked me to help. I helped. ;)

NatALLY: I love that! Hahaha

Linnea: what does the color on olli’s stick mean? 😌

NatALLY: hmm black, grey, white and purple. ITS ACE!!! So brave!!! 💜🖤🤍

Celeste: I love how they’re all wearing some sort of flag or colors. Proud of our boys!

GingerLily: so brave - James even bought Harry a little rainbow onesie. 🏳️‍🌈😍

Anyaismyname: we did good my lovelies 💖

NatALLY: I can’t all the glitter. Ohhh kase is not gonna be happy if that gets in his hair

GingerLily: I’m not going to tell him that James’ put glitter in his hat then.

NatALLY: please don’t 😂😂 Hahahaha

——

Sunday 10.00 am

“We’re live from Hogwarts where the Gryffindor lions are hosting a charity family skate event for lgbt+ mental health organizations. Remember to tweet, text or dm us with your questions during the broadcast and I’ll do my best to get replies from the players.”

“Joining me for a quick interview is fan favorite Thomas Walker”

“Walker, you’re wearing a rainbow jersey and is that glitter?”

“Ha yeah man! Proud ally here!!! And yeah somehow O’Hara and Nado got their hands on a box of body glitter and lemme tell ya, the locker room sparkles”

“That sounds fun. Is that the case for Ivanov’s hair too? Or is that a statement we’ve missed?”

“Ask him. Snitches get stitches eh?”

“Thanks Walker and as he’s skating away, we have Jackson Nadeau joining us. Also sporting the custom lions rainbow jersey and glitter, a lot of glitter”

“What’s wrong with glitter? I’m casual enough with myself to wear glitter”

“I’m sure you are - how’re you both feeling with this event?”

“Supporting our captain and close friends and anyone else who’ve been told they don’t belong. Lions are for all!”

“You feel strongly about this, Jackson, I didn’t mean any harm. Have there been reactions yet?”

“It’s hockey, what do you think? Lots of dicks out there but also a lot of guys who just wants to play and doesn’t care. You guys are making a fuss. Not us”

“I can ensure that the quibbler has no qualms with your captain or anything. We’re proud allies as well - which is why we’re covering this”

“Yeah thanks for that!”

“Seems like you’re having fun out there - is everyone participating today?

“ yeah uhm, I think, i mean, Kane is on IR with his elbow but he’s skating today. Not playing I think. Front office got us some cool stuff. I know I’m rocking this rainbow look. Some guys chose to wear other stuff which is cool too... kuny got glitter in his eye and is wearing a weird hat”

“I’m think you jealous”

“Haha! hello there Evgeni! How’re you enjoying today?”

“I’m have fun. Is good to. Uhm”

“Support?”

“Yeah support”

“Haha he wouldn’t survive a day without me”

“Well I’ve been following your Instagram recently - how’s your cat?”

“Princess is best cat”

“She’s good! Wanted to bring her but she’s at home with the sitter”

.... to be continued....

#lumosinlove #lumosinlove ocs #sweaterweather #sweaterweatherchats #sweater weather #sweaterweatheroc’s #sweaterweatherchatsnr13

[winterbuckytho]

When Is It Over

After being missing for 48 hours, Tony Stark comes into the restaurant and is escorted to the table James Rhodey was waiting for him at. Rhodey, always a patient and understanding man wanted to give Tony an absolute earful for disappearing like that. He and Happy had been just about to raise alarms when he got the text "I'm a genius and you know that but I had major breakthrough and can't talk to anyone else. You will never guess who's bed I woke up in."

Rhodey guessed wrong 17 times then finally gave up by texting back. "Uuuugh, I hate it when you’re right! Just tell me!!"

"One Sargent James Buchanan Barnes, the Manchurian Candidate himself. TMI, but we have no boundaries, he's an awesome lay btw. I'll send you info for a meetup and brunch. I need so much coffee."

And so not long after the two sat in a little known upscale place seated at a privately reserved table on a terrace over looking the sea, Rhodey asking how in the flying fuck Tony had ended up at a dick appointment in Wakanda.

"It all started a while ago but what happened last night started the night before last. I kept having this nightmare where Barnes is bearing down on Pepper and my reactor is busted and I'm trapped in my suit, pinned to the floor like a butterfly to a card by one of those creepy bug collectors. Pepper is right there but I can never convince him to not hurt her. Sometimes it's you or Steve and I guess because I watched footage of him before he started remembering stuff... God, the way he gunned after Steve, like a pretty Ultron. And I fought him myself in trigger mode, Christ, his eyes were colder than dry ice and emptier than Bruce's apartment right now... I had it again and sitting up after with a glass of warm milk thought about that exposure therapy thing, what is it called?"

"Systemic Desensitization?"

"Right, anyway, so I called King T'challa and it turned out Barnes was awake. So i asked to see him, explain what I want to try and do because I already have 15 flavors of PTSD, I didn't need a special designer one and reassured nothing like vengeance was even remotely on my mind. I just needed to see him outside the context I had him in before in Siberia so he agreed to have me."

"Whoa, that's a stupid idea. So what happened?"

"Well, he has a convalescent suite in the mines, most secure place on the planet I bet. From himself and from others. I went straight there and was on his doorstep at 2 the next morning. He was still willing to see me and the Princess seems to have figured out how to end his following through with the programming, so he opened the door and..."

--

"Stark, I understand I never even knew you and I fucked up half your lif-" Bucky Barnes began.

“I don't wanna talk about that Barnes..." Tony replied.

"Then what do you want?" Buck asked shaking his head a little at a loss as to why Stark would need to see him this bad. A cold fright made his belly feel full of squirming eels as he wondered what in God's name he had done now. 'Th-they say I'm alright now but before... I hardly remember being brought to Wakanda, everything after my arm was fried off... is just a smudge of awareness. Did I hurt him bad that day, he looks okay but what did I do..?'

"I... fuck, okay, this is one of those times where I am doing a crazy rich person thing, you know. I keep having these dreams... "I remember them all." you said. That's what you said and ever since I feel like I need to face you in a.... I don't know... unfiltered way? I need to know you're not going to... hurt me or Pepper or Steve or Rh-" 

Bucky stood in the doorway his blood chilled to slush in his veins. What did Tony want him to do? Act out some death wish? 'Absolutely fucking not. I will eat a gun before I endanger anyone else. I can't, I literally can't let it happen, even by the most unpredictable accident...' "Tony, what is it you mean for me to do? I'm not gonna fight you, I-i can't, I-"

"Shit, Sarge..."Tony says and aggressively goes in for a kiss. A hard confused long and breathless kiss.

--

"Oh my God, you did not!" Rhodey exclaimed his incredulity impossible to contain.

"You going keep talking or are you going eat your lunch and let me finish?" Stark says a little miffed even if he wouldn't say that word unironically.

"I thought you were in like, regular killer robots trouble, but this takes the cake, please do go on. I want every sordid detail. I can't tell if I'm more horrified at your taste in guys or frustrated with you for not telling me about what you were going to do."

--

'Oh god my heart is racing faster than that time it almost got its promised dose of metal shards before I could get the other reactor in. I might throw up. But uh yeah, I'll admit it. I'm definitely getting hard. Is this it? Is this what I need to make myself understand he's not a killing machine anymore? For an engineering genius I'm so fuckin' stupid... O-oh ah, is- is he... holding me?' Tony's mind went from one thought to the next so rapidly it almost made him dizzy. But as Barnes wrapped an arm gently about his waist and pulled him closer over the threshold and into his suite, his initial fright at his own actions became quieter and slowed till he was thinking nothing and only letting the electricity of it flow as neurons and synapses and receptors did their work. He could feel Barnes' lips tremble slightly against his as they kissed, cold metal under his palm as it slid up over the smooth curves up to the other man's shoulder, his need now becoming clearer by the second.

Bucky didn't understand what was happening and in ordinary circumstances would like to know and love someone before getting closer this way. It felt wrong at first and he was so hypervigilant he was half convinced his body was acting on its own to attack Tony until the man moaned deeply in to the kiss, the sound of it long and greatly pleased. Barnes pulled away a moment looking at Stark. "What is this? I... I’m afraid I don't understand..."

"You and me both, pal. Oh no, Steve is rubbing off on me.... But yes... I'm figuring something out. Can we go to your room?"

"I- uhm sure it's... uhm... on the left. End of the hall."

"Come on, I can make it fast."

"I... had no idea you..."

"Again. You and me both, pal. Turned out my heterosexual philandering was me performing gender conformity and trying to hide from anything real about myself. I think I swing both ways. Or multiple ways at once." Tony said leading to the bedroom. He took off his jacket and tossed it over the back of a chair by a small table in the room and sat on the edge of the bed. 

Buck sat next to him and said "Ah. Well, you're not alone in that. If I had a nickel for all the girls I had hanging on my arm while hiding the truth..."

"Wow. I mean... The length Steve was going for you... I didn't realize it was a two way street."

"Yeah, I'm fuckin' stupid for that boy. All those years... and then the first one I see his face again, the curse was lifted. Kinda like a fairytale." Barnes laughed.

Tony laughed too. A genuine happy sound he had been too anxious to properly make the last few months. Hearing Bucky say it like that, he knew they both loved the same things in their favorite star spangled dumbass. Another layer of fear melted and he grasped Bucky's metal hand. "Is this going to hurt what you got going for him? I can stop, find some other way to work through how I'm feeling about everything..."

"No, its okay. I...think I understand what you need."

"Oh yeah?"

"We were never properly introduced and until you know who a man is, he will always be a stranger."

'I'll be damned... that's kinda exactly what this is. I need to know him. I need to know him inside out like how I know Steve. It took almost dying together a few times for us to become friends. This is the express route for me and Barnes.' Stark sniffed and nodded then said abruptly, "But first I... I’m sorry. I'm sorry things went down how they did for you, I'm sorry for reacting that way when I found out our... connection. I- well I was going to say I'm sorry I blew your arm off but I'll say it when I'm sure I won't be lying. I had seen you kill a dozen people that day and I'm still scared shitless of you."

The room was quiet a moment as Bucky carefully gathered so he wouldn't burst in to tears before he could say it. "I'm sorry as well. I never got to apologize to any of their families before. So thank you too."

"Hey." Stark said quietly. He was beginning to truly feel something about Bucky other then that fever pitch fear. The time Barnes had come within a second of shooting Tony straight in the god-damned face came back to him but he didn't see that man in this moment. "I want to believe you so, come on. Make love to me and show me who you really are."

--

"Oo, you was being all smooth with it, okay, alright, Mr Stark, turn the swag on..." Said Rhodey.

"One of these days, Alice, right to the moon." Replied Tony.

"Ha ha, okay, I'll stop. One of these days...”

--

Barnes nodded and turned further to Tony reaching a hand out. He used the side of his index finger to take Stark's chin and tug lightly guiding him towards himself and beginning to kiss him in soft slow motions. "Do you want me to take charge a bit? Because I don't think I want you to make it fast."

"Hah~ I uh... don't mind, bottom, top as long as you're comfortable."

"How bout we work it both ways. I mean sure I'm big and can probably punch out that whole wall down in less than 3 minutes but I have a... softer side too."

"Being little spoon is nice..." Stark replied with a small smile pulling his tie vest and shirt off. He was endeared further to see Bucky blushing in the low warm light.

Bucky pressed him back on the bed and rolled half on top of him. His was so effortlessly strong his weight could barely be felt as he held himself from simply pinning Tony to the bed under him. Heat began to flush his body as the gentle kisses they traded became more passionate and hungry. A thrum of pleasure pulses outward from his pelvis and Bucky groaned in the ecstasy of it thinking 'Guess it's like riding a bicycle... it's all coming back to me now, huh?...uhn~' while his hips rocked forward pressing down against Tony.

It was a small gesture but so erotically charged, Stark's breath caught in his chest a second then he mirrored it with his hand sliding downwards to explore the stiffening shaft pressed against his thigh. He squeezed and stroked it marveling it a little for it's size and immediately wondering how much of Bucky's size was from the serum. He suspected from the way Barnes handled himself though that it was all Buck. He pulled the waist band of Bucky's pajama bottoms out and down exposing him. Tony's hand wrapped around it and he watched as Bucky's eyelids lowered and he breathed quietly "Oh God hahn..." pecs heaving as he gasped. Stark bit into his lower lip surprised how a sight like that could turn him on and quiet still more of his fear of the man. It humanized Barnes instantly like nothing else he could have made in the Avengers tower r & d labs.

Bucky's erection throbbed, Tony's hand feeling cool on it's hot skin as he took in the sensation just made it even more captivating but he paused a moment before raising himself to stand and pulled his pants off. As he did Tony took off the remainder of his clothes as well and soon they reconvened on the bed together. Tony waited for Buck to lie down then took a position that would serve well for oral. He was surprised to be further guided gently to straddle Barnes' face. They each used oral to the pleasure of the other and it was not long before the room was full of moans and sighs.

Barnes could never explain it but serving someone willingly in this scenario nearly made his mind melt with the extreme arousal building inside him. He moans softly his tongue massaging and circling sensitive skin, probing flicking at the entrance. He can't help how he is drawn in to the movement both soothed and excited by it, all the while feeling heat and soft textures and slick saliva slowly slathered up and down his length paired with a delicious friction he couldn't withstand in stoicism. His hips jerk and thrust up and his arms wrap around Stark's thighs pulling him down against his now wildly thrashing tongue.

"O-ohn hah! Mmm~!" Tony's breathes come fast and eratic as he tries to not be distracted from the task at hand. Which was enjoying Barnes' response to his sucking and licking of the man's cock. He is becoming increasingly intensely aroused to the point of loosing much of his control leaving him trembling and squirming as he struggles to keep his tongue moving. Finally unable to do much else he accepts Bucky's entire length in to his mouth allowing him to thrust himself in and out while Stark groans in deep pleasure at the many sensations.

Bucky came to a point where it wasn't enough and he needed to see his lovers face as well as become the more active party. He slowed his licking and paused one hand grasping Tony's arm and pulling him up to head of the bed French kissing him and enjoying the feel of their tongues sliding about one another. After a few moments they worked into missionary position. Bucky licked his fingers, massaged and stretching Stark making the man whimper and gasp pressing his head back into the pillows. Then he began to penetrate working his tip in slowly, setting urgency aside for a bit to be sure they were both on the same page.

Tony, experiencing great pleasure eagerly thrust his hips up as his calves rested on Barnes' broad strong shoulders. "I-it's okay, I'm experienced, you can go harder, go faster. Oh god~!" Even as he did it he was having a strong sense of sorrow derived from the way Bucky handled his body, with such a care, terrified of himself of hurting anyone. He knew this was because of who he was as a person and not just special treatment. Hydra had commited a deep sin against humanity by making such a man kill against his own will and every minute with the former Sargent made Stark's heart break for him, drowning the animal fear right out with the deep kindness that had stayed true in Barnes’ heart all these years.

Buck nodded now breathing heavily and started to thrust deep and hard at an almost relentless pace, grunting in a low tone his eyes scanning Tony's face drinking the pleasure he caused, this somehow just as pleasing as the direct stimulation of the sex itself. But still he maintained responsibility for both of their well being and carefully examined himself to be sure he could warn if he lost control of himself somehow. His ardor rose and swelled around him and to this he was perfectly happy to lose himself in the moment, his breaths harsh and fast as his powerful thighs and hips worked to thrust and his hands rose to lace his finger with those of both of Tony's hands holding them pressed to the pillow beside Stark's head on either side, Bucky's mouth exploring licking kissing Tony's throat and chest.

"That's it , oh don't stop, don't stop huhn!! Ah aaah hah~!" Tony groaned as he chased his orgasm. 

"Yeah? Ohn~ come on, come with me, come on baby..." Bucky told him between gasps and moans speaking softly into his ear.

It was one of the best climaxes he had ever had and he supposed it had something to do with how emotional the sex had been paired with Barnes commanding him to do it. 'I didn't even feel submissive till he took the reigns, and that's kinda how I like it.' Tony thought. Panting he said "You really must have given those girls a run for their money. And Steve?"

Bucky paused and smiled. It was honestly one of the most beautiful smiles Tony had ever seen. "Actually, I'd bet my left arm he's still a virgin. He's always so focused, no one ever wonders. They think a man like that would have been taken such a thing the first time it presented itself but our history together says otherwise. His birthday wasn't always July 4th, you know?"

"Meaning he didn't always appear to be the reserved type, a no kiss and tell sort of guy. Oh my God, that explains so much. Does he think it's too dirty or something?"

"Nah. He just wants the moment to be right. And it never can be with the world at stake every other day. He says to me, 'We can move to the country or the sea shore and no one will bat a lash. The ring can be made of the perfect materials for your hand and we can just settle down, when the fight is over’. He doesn't know... living is always going to be a fight. There's always a fight. It doesn't end until your heart stops. So he'll always be waiting for the right time and I'll always be waiting for him." His gaze was a bit melancholic, a bit proud and a lot yearning. His crystalline cerulean eyes swam with tears a moment before he closed them and leaned in to kiss Tony. 

Tony wrapped his arms around Bucky and now he felt more real than ever, there was no monster here. Just a man who was having the most rotten luck in history. And he still fought for more each day. 'Men like them really are cut from different cloth. I always thought my dad was just being a righteous asshole when he said that but no...'

--

"And I'm cured! Turns out the right guy can heal you with magic peen." Strk said sarcastically.

"Pft, really?"

"Well, of that one thing. My mind is still fucked pretty hard from everything else though. But I'm glad it's finally laid to rest. Dad would have wanted it that way. Mom would forgive him, why shouldn't I?”

"Jesus, did you just mature before my very eyes?" Rhodey said with a smile reaching out to put a hand on Tony's shoulder with a squeeze.

"Yep. Let's hope I don't have to fuck everyone who has wronged me to finally put my suit away." Tony sassed back patting the hand of his best friend.

He hoped that day would come though. That Steve and Nat and Bruce and Vision and Wanda and Sam and Clint could set down their suits and anger issues and come home so they could all be worth the wait together.

#winteriron #for no real reason at all #ns.fw #Bucky X Tony

[yamithediaperdork]

The Baby of Hearts (Kingdom hearts)

If you had told Sora, the wielder of the key blade, that he would go from fighting to save the world and stopping the heartless to being reduced to a helpless big baby, there's a good chance he would of told you to get off the drugs. However that was exactly what had happened to the brown haired boy, and while he had only been in his new role for a week, he was quickly losing himself in it. Gone was his weapon and his big boy clothes, and these days he was more swinging a rattle around, with a little heart emblem on the top to make sure everyone knew just WHO his new mommy was, not that it would of taken much to figure out. the thick bulky diapers mommy insisted that he wear at all times (And that he made use of as matter of course since he was forbidden to ever use a potty again) were hidden under whatever darling outfit she picked for him each morning, but they were always a mixture of red and black in color, and always had hearts all over them. because after all, Sora's new mommy was the queen of hearts.

He'd been visiting the Alice in wonderland setting, and been shocked to find that the queens guards had handled the heartless with relative ease. Since he wasn't really needed he'd been ready to take off, thanking her for her time when she had insisted on him at least having tea with her, to reward him for coming to their aid even if it wasn't needed. Having heard about her temperament, and knowing that it was just rude to turn down the offer anyways, Sora had accepted and joined her on the terrace, nibbling on cucumber sandwich's and sipping the strong tea. "Your just the CUTEST little thing, aren't you?" The queen gushed, smiling and chuckling."So tiny and helpless and yet going from world to world, saving everyone. but who looks after YOU?" she asked, and Sora squirmed and blushed as she took a hanky to his face, wiping away some crumbs. Not for the first time he wished Donald and Goofy had come with him, but they had wanted to steer clear of the queen, having heard horror stories. "I um..I manage. and I have good friends who help me out." Sora squeaked out, but stayed still as she finished. "oh, it's always good to have have friends sweetie, but Wouldn't it be better to have a mommy?" she asked. 'Red flag! Giant RED flag!' Sora thought as he shook a little and reached for his tea cup. "Uh..I er..Maybe. i don't know. Listen I have to get going though, the world isn't going save itself." He said and gulped down the last of his tea as the queen smiled warmly at him. "Thank you for the tea, and keep up the good..good.." Suddenly Sora had felt sleepy, his limbs heavy and the world started to spin a little. "Oh, is something wrong Little Sora?" The queen asked, her voice sounding amused. "I..I uh..I.." Sora tried to think, but his eyelids just felt so big and heavy. "I think my little man needs a nap. just close your eyes and go nighty night little sora. and let mommy look after you." She said. Sora barely had time to think 'Mommy?' before the world faded into darkness.

he couldn't be sure how long he had slept for, only that it had been morning when he'd shown up and now it was in the afternoon. His head hurt a little and as he tried to bring the world into focus Sora sat up, able to make out..bars in front of him and wondered if he was in a prison of some sort. Closing his eyes and going to rub them, he noticed that there was something on his hands, and opening his eyes back up he noticed that A) his hands were encased in thick baby mittens, with a red and black theme going on with little black hearts in the red ares and little red hearts in the black. B) he was in a nursery, not a jail cell and of course C) he was sitting in a crib. He went to go and make a dry comment when he noticed for the first time there was something in his mouth, so only a muffled jumble of nonsense was heard out loud. He could feel a rubber nipple in his mouth now and it didn't take a genius to know he likely had a pacifier in his mouth and as he pushed it out and looked down, he could confirm that was indeed what had been in his mouth. he could also confirm that he was wearing a red and black diaper shirt, in much the same style his mittens were in and a pair of baby booties. and judging from the bulk around his crotch.. Blushing crimson, and dully noting his paci- 'not paci! Pacifier ! don't go baby brain!' he reached down with the gloved hand and rubbed the front of the bulk, and confirmed from the series of crinkles and the feel he was back in diapers. 'Ok..so..you've been drugged and dressed like a baby..your in a nursery that most little boys would kill for, and you don't have your weapon and you're in the middle of a palace run by a queen who's not exactly well known for taking rejection well.' Sora thought 'Plus side is it's pretty clear she doesn't wanna hurt you, quite the opposite..so..you've been in more dangerous situations..though not more fucked up.' deciding his best course of action was to size up the room and take inventory of what he had at hand, he looked around. the room had a plush red carpet on the floor and the walls were a cream white, with paintings of playing cards playing and being sill on the walls. the crib he was in was King sized had had a light black sheet on it, while the bars were metal and the wood at the head and foot were red. there was a white blanket and a white pillow in the crib with him (and he noted to some slight embarrassment there were drool stains on the pillow) as well as a stuffie of the white rabbit that he assumed was in the crib to keep him company. By the stuffie was a made for his size baby rattle, with a black handle and red bulb, and a little black heart on the top of it. there was a queen sized changing table in the room once again cream white and he noted just how stacked it was with red and black diapers, and there was a silver pail next to the changing table which was labeled in red text 'Sora's diaper pail'. "oh good..she expects me to use these things.." he mumbled. shaking his head he finished his scan of the room, noting a large red and black toy chest (Clearly the queen was going for a theme) which was opened at the moment and showed off a large amount of plush toys. Rolling onto his knees and trying to ignore the crinkling and rustling of his diapers, Sora struggled to get up to his feet from the thickness of the diapers throwing his weight off, and the softness of the mattress making getting his footing hard. He was forced to make use of the crib bars to get up, though with his mittens it wasn't as easy as it looked, and swayed a little before bracing himself on the railing. It came up to his chest and Sora had no illusion that he'd be able to scale it, he was trapped in his for lack of a better term, baby jail till somebody came to let him out. he didn't see a dresser or any form of a baby monitor anywhere, there there was what looked like a closet..but he doubted he would of been left all alone with no way to check on him. "Hello? Is..anyone there?" he called out, trying to keep the slight panic over the weirdness of this all out of his voice. "Your royal highness? anyone?" he waited a few seconds, semi bouncing from the softness of the mattress while he waited, and wasn't disappointed as the door opened and in came the queen. "There's mommy's big baby! Did you have a good nap little guy?" she coo'ed, walking over and tickling his chin. despite the oddness of it all Sora couldn't help but break into giggles at the tickle, before catching himself. "I uh..your Highness I-" he started but got cut off. "oh, you don't need to be so formal with me sweetie, It's just mommy or mom or mama..whatever you prefer." she coo'ed and then reached over the bar and checked sora's diaper! "H-hey! what are you doing! I'm no-" he started to fuss and whine. "Hmm, just a little wet. you'll be god for a while longer." she said, ignoring his protests. "A diaper wetting..baby..Wait what? I'm wet?!" he asked, and looked down. How had he not even noticed that, and more to the point, when had he wet himself!?! He was NOT a bed wetter! "Of course you are silly. you've been asleep for awhile. the sleepy time meds mommy put in your tea wouldn't of hit you so hard but you were a little greedy boy and chugged them all down." She laughed, and grabbed him under the arms. with shocking ease she picked him up out of the crib and sat him on her hip, one strong arm supporting his weight and the other brushing his hair. "I..Your Highness, you need t stop this. I'm not a baby. I'm a big boy and I have big boy things I need to do." Sora said, trying to be reasonable. "Sora  sweetie, i told you, call me mommy or mom or Mama. and the only thing you need to worry about is being a good little baby for mommy. I've already contacted your widdle friends and told them how you begged to be my widdle guy, and Rikku has agreed to take over for you. so see? everything is going to be A OK." She coo'ed. "but..but.." Sora whined and despite himself, he felt tears coming up to his eyes. since when had he been such a CRY BABY!? "I don't wanna be a baby! I wanna be a hero!" he protested. "i know you THINK that's what you want, but Mommy knows better. now I'm going to give you some leeway since this is all scary and new for you, but I'm only going to let you fuss and pout so much. You should feel honored that out of all the silly so called big boy all over the worlds, I've chosen you to be my little royal baby." she said and kissed his cheek.  "That means you'll never have to worry about fighting again, or dating, or even using the bathroom. just being a cute widdle baby and filling your diapers with presents for mommy for the rest of your life." If her words where meant to be comforting, they had the opposite effect on Sora, who broke down bawling. The queen just smiled and pulled him in for a hug, patting his back. "shhh there there, let it alll out." As if on command, a loud bubbly fart and worse escaped out of Sora's back side, making his diapers droop. "heh, not what i meant, but keep making mommy presents~"

One week later and Sora had sadly gotten used to much of his new life. He'd tired to escape a few times but the spanking and corner time that had followed just hadn't of been worth the effort, when the furthest he had made it in all three attempts was measured in steps. when he behaved and was good he got big kid food though it was cut up and still fed to him by mommy,and got to drink yummy juice or nice milk from a sippy cup. When he was bad he was spoon fed gross baby food and bottle fed icky formula. with it made clear his treatment was dependent on how he behaved, Sora tried his best to be a good little boy, at least till he could figure out a way to escape. So when Mommy suggested that she'd like him to make her a pretty picture, he tried his hardest to draw one even with the baby mitten making holding the over sized crayons she gave him hard. he personally thought the ensuring scribble he'd ended up making look like crap, but the queen had it framed and hung in the throne room for everyone to see, and woe to anyone who tried to mock it. Speaking of the throne room, he had his own little throne of sorts so he could sit by the queen, no one was sure where the king was and Sora got the feeling no one really wanted to ask questions about it. His throne of course was really just a fancy gold plated highchair, and he had lots of coloring books  to keep him company while mommy was busy with work. One part of all of this that had semi shocked Sora, but he was glad for, was queen mommy refused to let ANYONE else change her widdle prince. it didn't matter how toxic his diapers were, or how long it would take, she insisted that she was the only one allowed to wipe the royal baby butt. It was the same logic that went into her being the only one who gave her little one a bath as well.

3 month's into his new baby life and Sora stopped even bothering to try and hold his tinkies or boomies in as he'd taken to calling them. he'd just let loose and give mommy a silly grin and wait for her to notice. He'd also become a total cuddle bug, and could spend hour's just sitting on mommies lap, snuggling into her and sucking on his paci, and was actually spending less and less time in his throne during the day. it had bugged him at first, cuz mommy went though a lotta trouble to get it for him but she assured him it was very much ok if he'd rather sit in her lap. Mommy had told him when getting him dressed that morning in his extra thick diapies and leaving him JUST in them, that some special people were coming by today JUST t see him. She mighta said their names but Sora had been too busy playing with Mr. Rabbit to play attention, holding him about his head and babbling around his paci as mommy changing his morning stinky. Sitting in mommy's lap and hugging Mr.rabbit, Sora grinned as it was Rikku and Donald and Goofy who came in, the last two going drop jaw at the site of his babied status, while Rikku had a huge grin on his face. "S-Sora? Gosh..I guess he really DID wanna be a baby!" Goofy said, rubbing the back of his head. "I guess we can call off the rescue attempt." Donald added. Sora furrowed his brow at that. Rescue attempt? why would he of needed  rescuing from mommy? she was the bestest mommy in like, all the worlds! "Your highness..Little prince." Rikku said, bowing."Sorry to of course and disturbed you, but my friends were starting to doubt this is what widdle Sora always wanted..and I thought it was best to nip this in the bud." "Oh, i don't mind. and I'm sure Sora's happy to see you all again anyways." the queen said, though she gave Donald and Goofy glares. Sora for his part took out his paci and after getting a head nodd from mommy, slid off her lap and toddled over to his friends. "Donald! Goofy! it's wike, been ferevers!" he cooed and gurgled, giving each of them a big hug. "And ou too Rikku! Fanks fer taking over fer me, I totally wove being mommies widdle baby wayy more then a dumb stinky hero." Sora giggled then paused as Rikku smirked. "o-h! not that yer dumb n stinky..i just meant-" he started to add on. "It's ok little guy. why don't you just put your paci back in and go back to mommy. left the big boy stuff to us, you just focus on being a good baby." well, to sora that made all sorts of sense, and so sucking on his paci, he toddled back to mommy, and letting his friends and his old life walk away forever.

The end.