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supimjustwriting · 3 years

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You Ruined Me

Features: Riddle Rosehearts, Leona Kingscholar, and Malleus Draconia

Author’s Note: I believe I had a bit too much fun with this. Honestly the idea I wrote for Malleus can become its own fic.

Riddle Rosehearts (Trey Clover) Genre: Comedy Warnings: Bullying, product placement

“My teeth are fine. I don’t need your help.”

It was supposed to be just another day at the Heartslabyul dorm, yet quiet whispers seemed to surround the couple.

“I heard that Riddle’s (S/O) doesn’t brush their teeth.” “Is that why they always have a closed lipped smile in photos?” “Ever since Trey mentioned it. I can’t help but notice how yellow their teeth are.”

Each word dug thorns into (Y/N) before they finally had to excuse themselves.“

Trey allow me to talk to you for a moment,” pulling the vice dorm leader aside. They mirrored their lover’s rosy cheeks while steam poured from their ears. “What have you done?”

“It’s just a passing comment. I’m sure things should blow over soon. Trends like this come and go all the time,” the clover haired male held his hands up in defense, a sheepish grin painting his lips.

“A trend? You call this a trend! I can’t even simply speak or eat without somebody. No. EVERYBODY, staring at my teeth!”

Before things could escalate further. A certain redhead entered the room, his eyes filled with worry and confusion like a child walking in on their parents arguing.

You and Trey reflexively apologize to each other, eyes glued to the ground. With the both of you explaining, each explaining their respective side. A new rule was born. At least [décor] reminders of the rule now made home to this rule flooded dorm.

The next morning a sign made their home upon the kitchen wall, followed by a picture of a smiling tooth. It was quite reminiscent of a children’s dentist office. The sign read” ALL STUDENTS ARE ENCOURAGED TO BRUSH THEIR TEETH AFTER EATING. THIS INCLUDES AFTER DRINKING TEA AS WELL AS OTHER FOOD ITEMS KNOWN TO STAIN TEETH.

Needless to say this was just another rule to be forgotten. At least they stopped talking about you and now call out each other.

[ Little did everyone know this was simply all planned by Trey to promote the new toothpaste he was working on.. It was a success. ]

Leona Kingscholar (Ruggie Bucchi) Genre: Drama/Angst Warnings: Stealing, invasion of privacy

“Anything else would’ve been fine but out of everything you had to pawn that?!”

You tore your room apart. Throat closing with each area of failure. Just where was your necklace? Taking a few deep breaths, you try to recall who could’ve visited your room. Crossing your arms over your chest, you create a mental list.

Jack stopped by to ask if you wanted to join him on his morning run, to which you grumbled softly. Still half asleep.

A while later Leona came, scooping you from your desk before holding you protectively against his chest. His body relaxing from the familiar warmth and scent your body gave. Though before you could fall asleep yourself. Ruggie popped in asking if he could have any spare notebooks laying around. Lazily gesturing to your desk, you close your eyes.

Ruggie.

“Where is it?” “I know you were half asleep but you agreed to letting me take those notebooks. You ain’t getting them back.” “Not those. You can take as many as you want but where is my necklace?”

The hyena’s face dropped as he chuckled nervously.

“Oh! That little ol’ thing? Out of your whole collection I thought you’d miss that one the least. So, I pawned it for some madol. Since it was yours to begin with, I’ll give you a cut of the profits. How does 75:25 sound to you? Sellers fees and all that,” he chirped, turning on his charming business mode.

Each word that left his lips caused your blood to boil ever hotter.

“So, you’re telling me. That you sold my only connection to home because it looked plain?”

Oh fu- He should’ve put sentimental value on the table as well. No wonder the pendant looked familiar to him. Hindsight truly is troublesome, isn’t it? With his ears pressed against his skull, a sheepish grin painted his lips.

“I could always buy it back?” “You will buy it back.”

Like a lion stalking their prey, you slowly made your way to the hyena only to be interrupted by a familiar groan.

“Oi, what’s with all the noise? Don’t you know that some people are trying to rest here?” A yawn erupted from Leona’s lips as he scratched the back of his head. “(Y/N)? From the look in your eyes. What did Ruggle do?” Nothing could hide the amused smirk forming upon his face.

After explaining the situation to Leona. You got your necklace back even quicker than promised. Needless to say a certain hyena was banned from your room indefinitely. Unless you decided otherwise. It’s your room. Leona won’t tell you what to do but he’ll throw in a suggestion here and there. Of course. Due to the talk Ruggie had with your boyfriend. He doesn’t even consider looking at your stuff the wrong way.

Malleus Draconia (Lilia Vanrouge) Genre: Horror, Angst Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, yandere themes

“Lilia, please don’t. We can talk this out! Can’t we? I don’t wanna be a fae. Please convince Malleus otherwise. I want to stay human. I want to stay me!”

You stared at the joyous fae before you. His maniacal smile never left his lips as he slowly approached your trembling form.

“Oh sweetheart. I would hate to be the bearer of bad news but this was your dearest’s idea. It broke his heart, you know?” Lilia’s voice dropped to an accusatory tone as he clicked his tongue at you. “I told him that loving a human comes with a heavy price. You can only truly give your heart to someone once. I will have you know. The other times will never be as pure as the first.”

Despite your sniffles and cowering form. He continued as if scolding a child.

“Humans have such short lives and so we talked it out. We agreed to tweak some things. Till death do us part is too tragic of a way to end a story, don’t you think? So, we decided to focus on the forever in the happily forever after. Romantic, isn’t it?”

Lilia closed the distance between the two of you. Before revealing a small vial with a pink sparkling liquid dancing within. Gingerly he held the glass to your lips, teasing you with your fate.

“And all it will take is just one gulp,” each word that followed, he tipped the glass ever so slightly.

Malleus watched the scene unfold before him an unreadable expression painting his face.

“Lilia,” his voice shook the room, filling the empty space with an indescribable pressure.

You were saved! Surely your upper classmen had to be joking, right? This was simply just one of his pranks going too far and Malleus is here to stop the teasing. Yes! That has to be it. Yet why does the draconic fae stare at you with such fascination?

“I thought we agreed that I would give it to them.”

In a fit of laughter, Lilia let your trembling form free. His eyes glowing a deep magenta as delight slowly filled him. The sight of the young couple warming his cold heart.

“Look Malleus, they’re shaking with excitement! I guess we got too carried away there,” the short haired male let out a sigh. “If only we were a bit quicker, right (Y/N)? Then we could have surprised your darling dearest.”

A soft smile crossed Malleus’ lips. “(Y/N), you didn’t have to do that. Though I am touched by the thought,” your boyfriend walked over to you before kneeling before your doll-like stature. “Let this day become a commemoration for the future years to come. I truly do love you from the bottom of my heart (Y/N). Now please, tilt your head back for me love.”

What was once a comforting embrace, now resembled a cage. His cold skin against your own reminded you of a corpse. Yet there was a soft burn coming from beneath. Love? That’s a fool’s wishful thinking.

You felt your scalp being tugged softly, snapping you from your thoughts. Gingerly long slender fingers caressed your cheek as if to remind you everything will be alright. With the bitter liquid sliding down your throat. All you could do was curse the pair from the bottom of your heart. How dare they ruin you like this?

#Twisted Wonderland #Twisted Wonderland x Reader #Riddle Rosehearts #Leona Kingscholar #Malleus Draconia #Trey Clover #Ruggie Bucchi #Lilia Vanrouge #Twisted Wonderland Yandere

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chibiwritesstuff · 3 years

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heyya yaaaa~! I just finished reading all of your works and lemme tell you, it’s all so nicely written! keep on going and don’t forget to take breaks when you need it, hm? alright, me stating facts about you and your writing talent aside— may I request lilia, floyd, ruggie and silver? Angst with a happy ending please? You can make it angst due to a misunderstanding or sumn. but oh well of course! that’s only if you don’t mind. Take your time dear, it’s not good to force yourself alright? bye~!

I see you saw the note that even I can’t find anymore that Lilia always gets a free pass on my 3 character limit XD. Thank you so much! I have long ways to be a decent writer but I’m glad you found my works nice. The one with Lilia is actually based on my own experience at work and I was told that’s an anxiety attack so uh... Also, I do kinda have to force myself or I’ll just keep focusing on work and not have time for myself which is writing.

(I swear all characters are treated equally and totally no favoritism... oh who am I kidding? Hail Lilia)

Warning(s): Mentions of an anxiety attack on Lilia’s part.

Now, let’s enter this twisted wonderland~

At first, he thought you just need something for Jade which he doesn’t mind. Everybody needs help once in a while.

But lately you two have pretty much stopped seeing each other.

Anytime he asks the trouble trio, they always respond that you’re with Jade.

Excuse me, if you wanted to break up with him just tell it straight to his face?!

He’s honestly hurt though. He thought you two are hitting it off really well.

Once he confronts you about it, you’re in the kitchen of Monstro Lounge.

“Wait, what are you doing?” He looked so confused and enamored of your look with an apron on.

“Ruggie, I love you and everything but I’m in the middle of a shift right now.” You immediately replied as you see Azul tapping his wristwatch.

“You work here?!” He jerked back in surprise. “I thought you are having a tryst with Jade!”

Cue to you and Azul spit taking (away from the food, of course, you ain't unsanitary) while Floyd burst out laughing and Jade chuckling.

Yeah, turns out you’re the current cook in the lounge to save up some money to buy him a gift for your anniversary.

Psh, he knows that. He’s just testing you… yeah.

Feel free to tease him about it since he used to do it to you anyway.

Okay, surely you just need Vil for a question or two, right?

You keep making excuses to get out of his hair lately and he doesn’t like it at all.

Yet whenever Rook calls for you because Vil asked for it, you’re suddenly available.

His mood swings are worse than a pregnant woman’s so you better explain quickly.

“Floyd! I finally found you.” You greeted him three weeks after you two last have an actual conversation.

“Can’t talk right now, I’m busy. Why don’t you go back to Vil?” He snapped at you as he began walking away.

You merely blinked at his reaction and shrugged. “Okay, you gave me the go signal so don’t you go blaming me for it.”

“That wasn’t permission! Get back here and pay attention to me!” He pouted and shook you violently. “Why do you always pay attention to Vil? I thought I’m your boyfriend?!”

“Well, my sense of fashion is wack so I thought I’d ask an expert.” You struggled to respond as you tried to hand over a box which made him stop shaking you. “Vil hooked me up to get these for you after being ordered around to do things… Happy anniversary… oh god I feel sick…”

“Eh?” He opened the box to reveal the Tenebres brand of shoes that he’s been wanting. “Shrimpy, thank you!!!”

Yeah, have fun trying to hold that nausea in because this eel ain't ready to let go just yet.

As much as Lilia is a great person to hang out with, he can be quite neglectful on certain things because of having too much fun.

You don’t show it that much but you do get anxiety attacks when you get surprised. While not severe it’s still quite a scary moment.

It doesn’t help that you’re carrying something very valuable and very fragile to Vil when he decided to pop out of nowhere upside down.

“What you got there, (y/n)?” He casually asked.

“Ah!”

A loud crash echoed in the hallway and your face pales up as Vil’s delivery is now on the floor, shattered. Just the sight of it is enough to send your thought spiraling as you can vividly picture Vil yelling at you for being careless and useless you can be. You are aware that your brain is exaggerating things but as your anxiety attack gets more prominent, the harder it is for you to breathe and rationalize which only made you panic. Your ears started ringing that you failed to hear Lilia calling out your name multiple times. You must have blacked out for when you regained your sense of focus and hearing, you can see a concerned Lilia hovering above you.

“Oh seven, my apologies little one.” He replaced the wet cloth on your forehead before continuing. “I should have known or at least notice you have anxiety attacks.”

When you’re feeling better, Lilia personally talked to Vil about the situation and offered to replace the said item.

Much to your surprise, Vil got mad at Lilia for causing your anxiety attack and even used his unique magic on the fae’s apron and favorite ladle.

Yep, the old man is currently banned from cooking. (Diasomnia sent Pomefiore their thanks that day.)

Nonetheless, Lilia is now careful about his random appearances and is now more attentive.

The downside is that he permanently has his dad mode on.

This man trusts you a lot.

He knows you won't force him to do things he doesn’t like and respected the fact that his main priority is to service Malleus. The same goes that you trust him that you love him and he won't force you to do things you don’t like.

So, when he saw you spend way more time with Deuce than him especially during his sword practice, he wasn’t pleased.

He’s rather blunt about it too that he just stops you in the hallway around other students.

“Why are you hanging out with Deuce too much?”

“He’s my friend, Silver. Of course, I’ll hang out with him when you’re busy.” You cocked your head sideways out of confusion.

He frowned, still not like the ache he feels in his chest. “Doesn’t mean you have to do it every time.”

“Hey, I don’t stop you from being with Mr. Draconia every time but I get restrictions? What happened to being fair to each other?”

“It's my duty to be around Lord Malleus, you on the other hand waste your time on someone else’s company.” He defended and straightened his posture unconsciously to assert authority. “If you have free time then watch me practice or something.”

“I did that before and I ended up falling asleep on the hard ground so you told me to do something else instead, remember?” You can't help but be hurt by the contradictions he spouting out right now especially since you two have garnered the attention of almost all the students nearby. “Can you take some time to cool down first before we talk about this again? I don’t want any misunderstandings to happen between us.”

“So you can go back to Deuce’s side already?” Anger slowly seeping into his visage but immediately disappeared with your hurt expression.

“Do you trust me so little…” You whispered not intending for him to hear. “You know what, fine. I’ll go to Deuce until you finally get your head straight.”

Let me tell you now, he feels everything just came crashing down. He never intended for it to cause a big rift between the two of you but at the looks of it, you two needed space.

The entire day this man will try to talk to you again but by some unknown force in the universe, there's always something preventing him to do so.

He’s so lost he can't even take a nap even in the comfort of the forest animals.

Deuce smacked him to his sense quite literally. Like, our delinquent boy just punched the living daylights out of this guy.

Deuce has to explain that you two are pretty much siblings when it comes to closeness and you’re always talking about him all the time.

Be prepared to be serenaded tonight, Silver ain't letting you leave him on a bad note.

Well, more like that’s what Lilia taught him to do since he was young.

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helpidkwhattoput · 2 years

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OOC Incorrect Quotes time let's go

Under the cut because this is long and i had way too much fun

Jing: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Silver: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.

Jing: You know, not every problem can be solved with a sword.

Silver: That's why I carry two swords.

Jing: Silver...

Silver: Oh no, 'Silver' in b-flat.

Silver: You're disappointed.

Jing: What is your biggest weakness?

Silver: I can be uncooperative.

Jing: Okay, can you give me an example?

Silver: No.

Jing: So that’s my plan.

Silver: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean.

Jing: No, go ahead, I want to hear it.

Silver: It fucking sucks.

Jing: That’s not constructive criticism.

Viola: Is something burning?

Lilia: Just my love for you.

Viola: Lilia, the toaster is on fire.

Jing: Violence isn't the answer.

Silver: You’re right.

Jing: *sighs in relief*

Silver: Violence is the question.

Jing: What?

Silver, bolting away: And the answer is yes.

Jing, running after him: NO-

Jing: What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Silver: Wow, you could start with a 'good morning'.

Jing: Good morning. What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Jing, struggling to keep upright in her 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don’t really think heels are for me

Silver, pointing at her and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

Jing: Silver and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's-

Silver: Sentences.

Jing: Don't interrupt me.

(My villain arc when-)

Jing: Must be hard not being able to laugh

Silver: I do have a sense of humor you know

Jing: I’ve never heard you laugh before

Silver: I’ve never heard you say anything funny

Silver: Jing, stop! This isn't you, you've gone mad with power!

Jing: Well of course I have.

Jing: Have you ever tried going mad without power?

Jing: It's boring.

Jing: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor.

Silver: I'm sorry is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it.

Jing: Here's some advice

Silver: I didn't ask for any

Jing: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me

Jing: Fuck.

Silver: We've got to work on your cursing.

Jing: Why? I'm pretty good at cursing already.

Jing: Three words. Say them and I'm yours.

Silver: Three words.

Jing:

(and this's why Viola banned him from the kitchen when they're around)

Jing: Am I in trouble?

Silver: Take a guess.

Jing: No?

Silver: Take another guess.

Viola, talking to Lilia on the phone: Did you preheat the oven like I told you to?

Lilia: You bet!

Viola: At what temperature?

Lilia: 535.

Viola: That's the clock.

Lilia:

Viola:

Lilia: 536.

Viola: So what’s for dinner?

Lilia, staring at the food he just burned: Regret.

Jing: I made tea.

Silver: I don’t want tea.

Jing: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.

Silver: Then why are you telling me?

Jing: It is a conversation starter.

Silver: That’s a lousy conversation starter.

Jing: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

(Aka Vilia before Lilia got used to amount of kids Viola adopts)

Jing: How many kids do you have?

Viola: Biologically, emotionally, or legally?

Viola: You love me, right, Lilia?

Lilia: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.

Lilia, pointing: May I sit there?

Viola: That's my lap

Lilia: That doesn't answer my question, Viola.

Jing, pointing: May I sit there?

Silver: That's my lap

Jing: That doesn't answer my question, Silver.

(Decided to do this because of that one Lilia overblot art)

Lilia: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside

Viola:

Viola: Lilia, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Lilia: *Sips coffee from bowl*

(First meeting gone wrong maybe?)

Viola: Lilia, stop! This isn't you, you've gone mad with power!

Lilia: Well of course I have.

Lilia: Have you ever tried going mad without power?

Lilia: It's boring.

Viola: *Accidentally hits Lilia in the face*

Viola: *Trying to decide between saying 'I’m fucking sorry' and 'Are you okay'*

Viola: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

Lilia: What’s wrong with you?!

(Lilia back when he wants violence as a soldier)

Lilia: You saved me. I owe you my life.

Viola: No thanks. I’ve seen it and I’m not very impressed.

Viola: Violence isn't the answer.

Lilia: You’re right.

Viola: *sighs in relief*

Lilia: Violence is the question.

Viola: What?

Lilia, bolting away: And the answer is yes.

Viola, running after him: NO-

Viola, tending to Lilia's wounds: How would you rate your pain?

Lilia: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

Viola: This is such a bad idea.

Lilia: Then why are you coming along?

Viola: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

(When they look like they died)

Viola: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives

Lilia: I wake up at 4:30 AM

Viola:

Viola: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives

(Enemies to lovers au maybe)

Viola: What’s up guys? I’m back.

Lilia: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die.

Viola: Death is a social construct.

Lilia: So are we flirting right now?

Viola: I AM LITERALLY STABBING YOU

Lilia: That doesn’t answer my question

Viola: I’m going to take you out

Lilia: great, it’s a date!

Viola: I meant that as a threat.

Lilia: See you at five!

Lilia: *Gets down on one knee*

Viola: Oh my god, it’s finally happening.

Lilia: *Falls over*

Viola: The poison is kicking in.

Viola: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds.

Lilia: FORTY FIVE SECONDS?!?

Viola: No! Four to five seconds!

Lilia: Too late!!!

Lilia: Lol heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this lmfao

Viola: What did you do now?

Lilia: A MISTAKE

Viola: Lilia and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's-

Lilia: Sentences.

Viola: Don't interrupt me.

(I think I saw Lilia as this before but this is too perfect)

Viola: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.

Lilia, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

Jing: *Stubs her toe* FUCK!

Silver: Mind your language!

Jing: What else am I supposed to say, “Woe is I”???

Silver:

Jing: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimes.

Lilia: Am I in trouble?

Viola: Take a guess.

Lilia: No?

Viola: Take another guess.

Viola: Don’t worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve.

Lilia: I think you mean cards.

Viola, pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

Viola, in a meeting: My policy is if you see something, say something.

Lilia: I saw a squirrel in a tree today!

Viola, with the tone of someone who is used to Lilia: Outstanding.

Viola: This is what I’m talking about people

Lilia: I turned out perfectly fine!

Viola: Lilia, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast

Lilia: I DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN!!!

(Add on by me)

Viola: Honey did you forget that I can levitate things with my Magic

Lilia:

Viola:

Viola: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE

Lilia: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially

Viola, desperately, as Lilia bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE

Lilia: Oh! B positive.

Viola: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE

Lilia:

Viola: Lilia was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.

Lilia: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.

Viola: Lilia, you ate a chair.

Viola: Where are you going?

Lilia: To get ice cream or commit a felony, I’ll decide on the way there

Viola: This is a mistake

Lilia, enthusiastically: A mistake we're going to laugh about one day!

Viola: But not today

Lilia, still enthusiastic: Oh, no. Today's going to be a mess

Viola: Hey Lilia can I get a sip of your water?

Lilia: It's not water.

Viola: Vodka, I like your style!

Lilia: It's vinegar.

Viola: Wh-Wha-

Lilia: It's vinegar, COWARD.

Viola: Lilia...

Lilia: Oh no, 'Lilia' in b-flat.

Lilia: You're disappointed.

#incorrect quotes shenanigans #tw death mention #tw blood #tw stab mention #tw poisoning mention

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thisislizheather · 3 years

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March Magic 2021

Above Photo: Cherry Blossoms are in bloom at the University of Washington right now - Photo By Kai Wang

Am I alone in thinking that was the longest March of all time? It truly felt like it would never end. Usually I love my birthday month, but with everything still the way it’s been for the past year, there really didn’t feel like much of a reason to celebrate. Also, Nathan got COVID. It was awful and scary and I was worried about how he’d be, but all is well and he just got his vaccine this past weekend, which is incredible. So a real roller coaster type of month, but thank god it’s over.

Here’s everything that went down last month.

I recapped how my winter list of things to do went.

Forever an optimist, I made a list of spring things that I’d like to do. One of my favourite things to do is get a pedicure on the first day of a season. I don’t get them very often at all, so it’s a nice way to usher in some new weather.

I finished watching Superstore, which is such a great show. I would’ve never watched it on my own, so this is why you have to listen to your best friend’s recommendations sometimes. They know more than you. Also, it was weird as hell to hear the Smashing Pumpkins song Today in one episode. Just seemed like a strange pairing, them and this show. Or any show, really. But I mean they did lend a song to that Apple ad, so I guess the old days of Billy Corgan complaining about everything are over.

I read and reviewed Joan Rivers’ book Enter Talking.

I made my way back to Lilia with Irene to devour their seasonal leek focaccia & green salted butter, which is always heaven on a plate. (Me and focaccia have had a pretty strong love affair going on for some time now. I plan on making it at home soon, but I can’t decide on the flavouring I’ll want to add to it. There are too many possibilities.) We also shared two pastas: the corzetti with pine nuts, marjoram & parmigiano reggiano as well as the sheep’s milk cheese agnolotti with saffron, dried tomato & honey. Always a good meal here. Might benefit from some new pastas, though.

Above Photo: My sweet baby girl, leek focaccia & her green salted butter

Above Photo: Stunning Irene & pasta

Above Photo: I’m very excited for bread

I got my first Moderna shot! I usually have tons of anxiety around needles, but somehow it wasn’t a problem this time (maybe because I had the kindest nurse on the planet). It sounds so simple, but she told me to look away, to take a deep breath and while I was taking that breath she put the needle in and THAT WAS IT. So grateful for that advice. Must remember that for life now. I have my next shot on April 8th! (I did get COVID arm, but it went away in 24 hours so it really wasn’t a big deal.) Also, I’ll definitely ask a medical professional, but if it’s allowed then I’m definitely getting my card laminated for free.

There’s this great, cute new store called Gift Box on Broadway in Astoria. It’s very similar to Lockwood, only better. Lots of cards, gifts, beauty products, candles, that kind of thing.

It’s green garlic season and we must all celebrate! I’ve also decided that I might devote my life to compound butters. Making them, eating them, giving them away as gifts potentially. Maybe this is what’s been missing.

Google image search the vagar faroe islands and let’s go.

I can’t stop putting this Esti vegan feta on everything, it tastes exactly like regular feta only slightly less salty.

Everything from the brand Umbra is gorgeous.

These are officially (and my niece Layla can attest to it) the greatest socks on the planet. Not too tight, not too short or high, and soft as a cloud.

Best kale caesar dressing I’ve had in months. And I love the idea of using breadcrumbs instead of croutons to liven things up a bit.

I made this roasted winter citrus and wow was it hot fruit. It should be a crime to make something look this good, but taste average as hell.

I started using the app Google Keep to organize all of my lists and tasks and I love it. It’s so much better than using Notes.

HOW have I never even HEARD of Shake Shack’s Innovation Kitchen?! AND HOW HAVE I NEVER BEEN. It’s moved to the top of my current Must Visit list.

I may or may not have fallen down a rabbit hole of incredible Melissa Clark recipes. Love this woman.

If you live in Englewood, New Jersey, how do you not just LIVE at this bakery? My god. Every item. In my mouth. Now.

And listen, I’m no scientist, but this seems like huge news…?

If you find yourself anxious or unsettled, this video of lasagna being made from scratch is the most soothing thing I’ve come across in months.

Target sells candles?! I’m the last person on earth who learned this. $4 for an actually great mini candle is wild.

Tried a slice of the red velvet cake from Milk Bar and it was unexpectedly good. I don’t usually care about red velvet (because it’s a scam?), but honestly their cakes always find a way to taste amazing.

I made this cajun linguine and it was so lackluster, I hate when a pasta recipe doesn’t work out. It’s so upsetting. Also, cajun seasoning can blow me.

They’re opening a Sonic in Manhattan, which I’ve never been to before, is it worth going?

I know Eataly is for tourists, but once in awhile I like to stop in to peruse. I tried one of their prepackaged foods (the eggplant parmesan) and it was a hard pass. Just no flavouring at all. The only thing that saved the day were their individual little Italian chocolates. Always amazing. I do want to eventually try their dried pasta Afeltra since I’ve heard such good things about it.

I don’t know about you, but I’m definitely not ready to watch documentaries about the pandemic yet. I don’t know if I’ll ever want to. I mean… we’re still IN IT, for christ’s sake. HBO needs to just sit down.

Tell me that you know the song Sea of Love.

You had me at “cheese-oozing focaccia.”

Great piece on diet culture by Julia Turshen.

When I was in Seattle in April a few years ago, I wandered onto the University of Washington’s campus and was blown away by their gorgeous cherry blossoms. They have a livestream of them right now, if you’d like to take a look.

With plastic bags officially banned now, I desperately need a basket bag to take when I go to the farmer’s market. So f-ing lovely. Everyone will think I’m Belle or some shit.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a fresh Jamaican patty in my life, so I’m definitely going here the next time I’m in Mississauga.

I love this chickpea salad, especially after adding basil.

Some of these are actually really great tips.

How on earth have I never heard of the restaurants Dell’anima or Anfora?! They’re both under the Joe Campanale umbrella (of L’Artusi fame)! I’m so excited to go. Just look at those menus.

Speaking of, I can’t go for too long without eating the wagyu steak tartare at L’Artusi. It’s a problem. (It also makes me want to buy a really great finishing olive oil, so I’m looking into that. I’m thinking either Monini or Frantoia.)

Above Photo: Wagyu steak tartare at L’Artusi

One thing I’ve started to do that you should too: buy good butter. I stopped buying margarine many years ago and thought I was a better person for buying regular grocery store butter. But sweetie, you can do more. The butter (specifically European butter) in specialty shops or some bakeries or markets is EONS better than the run-of-the-mill basic grocery butter. And it enhances literally everything that you use it in. Right now, the butter in my fridge is beurre de baratte butter and it’s ridiculously good. Obviously I’m not going to use this butter when I’m baking because I’m not a millionaire, but when I’m making something savory for dinner? Or a compound butter? Or on top of asparagus? On some bread as a snack? It’s unreal.

Speaking of food advice: don’t buy your parmesan at the grocery store either. I’ve never had amazing parmesan from there. It’s always the same, even the expensive stuff. Get your ass to a cheese shop. Enough already, you’re an adult.

I tried a CBD chocolate and just as I thought: it’s a scam. Just like red velvet. It did nothing for nobody.

I bought this tea tree toner on a whim from The Body Shop and I might keep buying it for the rest of time. I use it on my face right when I get out of a hot shower and it’s kept my face feeling incredible lately.

A new coffee shop opened up in my neighbourhood called Coffee Avenue and I can’t recommend it enough. The macadamia milk hot chocolate blew my face off.

I finally ate at Bar Primi in the city and it was spectacular. We had the ricotta crostino with hazelnuts & truffle honey (which is almost like a dessert, it’s so good), the linguine with 4 cloves of garlic & breadcrumbs as well as the penne ragu alla bolognese with ricotta which was the very best. Can’t wait to go again. Loved the atmosphere of the place, too.

The seasonal candle is out at Trader Joe’s and it’s grapefruit, which smells perfect. I’ve finally stopped hoarding their candles and have started burning them. Only took me a year of lockdown to realize I should try to enjoy my life.

Lemon Kit-Kats exist and all is right with the world. Delicious.

I don’t go very often, but I’ll always love The Dutch. Perfect cornbread. Perfect tartare. You can’t go wrong.

Above Photo: Housemade scallion-chipotle cornbread with whipped butter

Above Photo: Wagyu steak tartare, capers, bearnaise aioli

*Note: if it seems like I eat a lot of steak tartare - I do. Good observation. It’s incredible.

Controversial opinion but the Dove chocolate peanut butter eggs are one millions times better than Reese’s peanut butter cups. I couldn’t believe it either.

This leads me to another declaration: Easter candy might be better than Halloween candy. Hear me out. Halloween candy is almost chaotic when you think of the candy options, it’s overwhelming and more often than not, disappointing. Easter candy, however, is usually always new and fresh each season. They’ve got to work harder to get you to notice Easter candy, so infact you’re getting a more well thought out product, which usually tastes better. Anyway, can you tell I’m depressed…?

I went to the new Ulta location in NYC in Herald Square and it’s great, it seems bigger than the UWS one and it’s way more convenient to visit. Must remember. Oh! But speaking of Ulta, remember how last year they had such great birthday gifts? They really dropped the ball this year. They’re trying to give a $5 Mario Badescu facial spray as the March gift?! Are you fucking serious?! That’s the worst. Literally the worst gift of all the months. Fighting every urge in my body to write them a strongly-worded letter about this. Just insanity. I didn’t even go claim it. Keep your damn gift, no spray can calm me down from this.

New love: macadamia milk in my iced coffee in the morning. Just heavenly.

I rewatched Wall-E and what a great movie. For all ages. Too perfect.

Love the song Team by Lorde.

I watched the Woody Allen & Mia Farrow documentary on HBO and it’s obviously a must watch. So many things I didn’t know about that story were shown, this man needs to be stopped.

If you ever get a new phone and you want to transfer over all of your WhatsApp messages to your new phone (and you’ve never backed them up), you can pay $40 and use this site to do it.

The new Super Mario World in Japan looks incredible.

Do not judge me, but I ordered (and returned) a SKIMS bralette. I was swayed by a few photos of women wearing it and wanted to see for myself what it felt like. Verdict: crap. Sure, the material is soft but only because it’s so poorly made and unsupportive. An immediate return. The beautiful colours of the bras are what sells the product, in my opinion. It’s so hard to find well made, beautiful browns and neutrals in undergarments.

Speaking of what’s her name, I also ordered this KKW mini lip liner set that I’m unfortunately in love with. I use it as a lip liner and filler, and each fucking one is gorgeous. I’m going to do a post to show you. You’ll see what I mean.

I came across this wonderful stationary store in Chelsea, City Papery. I could spend hours roaming the aisles in there. Made a mental note to go back to get some really beautiful envelopes (why on earth am I still buying the basic-ass white envelopes at CVS??), such a great store.

I’m proofreading a book right now about the idea of living with intention and I’ll post a link to it as soon as it’s released later this year. It’s honestly one of the best self help things I’ve read in a long time.

I’ve had a Pinterest account forever and I recently organized a lot of the recipes into seasonal categories, which has inspired me to make so many new meals this season. Check it. Also, I haven’t tried these yet, but these spring recipes (below) sound delicious.

Blueberry Ricotta Cake with Lavender Glaze

Banana Carrot Cake Cupcakes with Coconut Cream Cheese Frosting

Lemon Almond Pudding Cake

Asparagus Quiche with Hash Brown Crust

Apricot Shortbread Bars

Buttermilk Lavender Scones

Carrot Cake Bread with Nutella Cream Cheese Frosting

Lemon Olive Oil Cake with Lavender Mascarpone

I’ve mentioned my filmmaker friend Dusty before (his film Violation was at Sundance this year), well his movie is a Critic’s Pick in the The New York Times this month, which is amazing and so well deserved. Truly could not happen to a better person.

I have eaten approximately five pounds of asparagus since spring began and I can’t see myself stopping anytime soon. It’s so fucking good. One grievance: that huge, fat asparagus. Why’s it so big like that?? Unnatural as hell. Give me that thin, beautiful asparagus that’s increasingly so hard to find any day. And to anyone who’s like, “Don’t you hate how it makes your pee smell?” - why you gotta go smell your pee? Be normal, weirdo.

I did Nathan’s podcast and we talked about how it’s been so beneficial to get some intentional offline time each Sunday.

Here were the best tweets of the month.

Some things that I’m looking forward to this month: I’m trying so hard to find a way to stream the last three episodes of Stanley Tucci’s Searching For Italy which has been impossible to find, will definitely go check out Little Island, excited to maybe go to the Kusama exhibit, I’d really like to make the Carbone garlic bread, I want to locate and try milk bread, my brother Robbie told me to mix balsamic vinegar & mayo and put it on a burger so I’ll try that soon, I bought some dried Rao’s pasta so I can’t wait to make it, I’m so excited that movie theatres are opening on the 2nd here (I’ll be fully vaccinated very soon so this is great), and I’m adding a resolution: I’d like to do one new thing on the first of every month (examples: buy stock in something, eat ramen, etc.).

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in February over here.

#best of NYC #NYC #NYC 2021 #this is liz heather #Liz Heather #march 2021 #things to do in NYC 2021 #Kusama exhibit #Stanley Tucci #Positive Anger #monthly post March 2021 #monthly post #best tweets #how to spend spring

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