#LOL one of my abusers would say this shit about her shitty boyfriends and it always always made me angry

[audhd-nightwing]

more of punk!steve bc i adore him

steve first runs into the Party at the arcade (where he works part time because he wants to make his own money as a ‘fuck you’ to his parents and cuz it’s a chill job) and he becomes their favorite worker and they become his favorite customers. one day steve takes a smoke break in the parking lot and sees some kids bullying the Party and his older brother instincts kick in.

he walks up behind the party like “well well what do we have here?” and the Party is like “steve!! :D” and steve in his leather jacket and ripped jeans and combat boots glares down the bullies and they scamper off. from then on steve tells the kids to go to him if someone is bothering them and it becomes town-wide knowledge not to mess with byers wheeler henderson & sinclair. he basically becomes their personal Scary Dog.

the parents end up wanting to meet this young man who kept bullies away from their kids (and they’ve heard all sorts of rumors about him and he dresses like That so they’re suspicious) and steve’s like “yeah sounds great!” and immediately charms all of them because he’s a sweetheart and does genuinely care about and want to protect their kids. from then on he’s the go-to babysitter / ride to school / campaign host. steve pretends to be annoyed but he loves it and treats them all like they’re his younger siblings (especially lucas and dustin)

joyce and steve bond especially and they have coffee dates every sunday and just talk (joyce tries to get steve to come to her when he needs help or just someone to listen). at first everyone who sees them is super confused because what is paranoid mother Joyce Byers doing with the high school bad boy Steve Harrington?? but after a couple months it just becomes commonplace and people will even stop by to say hi

i also think jonathan and steve would end up being best friends in like freshman year and steve would get jancy together in s1 (steve and nancy don’t date). he’s never a third wheel though they have a great “this is my boyfriend and our best friend steve” type relationship. (plus jonathan never takes the creepy pics and the whole fight never happens so they’re all chill).

steve and robin are fellow outcasts so they’re chill. then steve beats up some guys who harassed her and they become actual friends and steve lets robin come over whenever her parents are being shitty. steve lowkey converts her into a punk and they basically do illegal shit and have a bunch of fun.

btw steve is a fully realized biromantic demisexual (or just queer whatv lol) and he has an extremely accurate gaydar which is partially why stobin become friends. anyways i’m mentioning this becauseee

steve meets will byers and Immediately Knows and pretty much comes out to him and tells him it’s okay and he becomes wills Gay Mentor (imo jonathan can either be straight or queer and just not really informed abt gay shit so steve would be the mentor in his place bc they’re basically brothers anyway (joyce absolutely tries to adopt steve multiple times)).

steve meets max at the arcade before any of the Party befriend her and she immediately becomes another of his favorite customers (the ranking is dustin, will & lucas & max, mike). she thinks he’s super cool and basically projects onto him as an older brother figure and he’s happy to play the part. he notices the way billy treats max and threatens him that if he ever treats her like that again he will kill him and hopper will help him hide the body. things are pretty peaceful for max after that. additionally neil hargrove gets arrested for domestic and child abuse and billy takes his car and leaves without a word. max’s mom still drinks so steve kinda unofficially adopts her, she has her own room in his house and ends up staying there most days. he ends up actually adopting her later but they’re still more of an older brother & younger sister dynamic than father & daughter

steve doesn’t interact with eddie until s4 but they know of each other and are on neutral terms until the byers move to cali and eddie starts DMing for dustin lucas mike erica and max (who steve managed to convince to play). they’re wary of each other at first but eddie realizes steve is actually a huge softie and steve realizes eddie is just a cute dork who reads LOTR and plays D&D.

steve isn’t on any sports teams or anything but he works out on his own, goes for jogs every morning with jonathan and nancy especially after the demogorgon and demodog shit. basically he’s fit and good at fighting (due to more experience with it) and nancy taught him how to shoot so he can do that too. most of his scars are from demo-creatures instead of fistfights, though he has a few of those too (not from jonathan or billy tho).

#punk steve harrington #punk steve au #stranger things #steve harrington #the party stranger things #jonathan byers #nancy wheeler #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #will byers #mike wheeler #jancy #robin buckley #platonic stobin #the couple and their mutual bsf troupe #i love it sm #joyce byers #max mayfield #steve and max #they are siblings your honor! #eddie munson

[bad-science]

yo wait ur sister was arrested?? On your birthday??

🤪🤪 lol yUP. She’s… yeah. “A mess” doesn’t even begin to cover it. There’s a massive amount of detail spanning years that I can’t even put in a single post but I have no issue putting her on blast here LMAO. A bit of a vent I guess, Warning for mention of suicide, abuse, and sort of domestic violence

I’ll put it under a cut sjdhsj but the TLDR is she fought with her shitty bf and threw an empty soda can at him, threatened to kill herself and all the cops, and now has a charge for domestic violence.

Happy birthday to me!!!!! My life is a divine comedy and I am not laughing <3

The summary is that she’s a shit tier person who’s dating another shit tier person and they abuse each other until she threatens to kill herself, which she has done for basically the last 10 years if anybody tells her no about anything at all and if she doesn’t get her way. It’s always just a threat and she uses it to get attention and manipulate everyone around her - and I would NOT say this lightly. She is legitimately a sick and horrible person who has mistreated and abused me and my mother to the point of our own mental health reaching a very seriously bad state. I do believe she has some sort of mental illness which could be influencing her actions but my god she refuses to get any help and nothing we do or offer her is ever good enough. When she was a teenager a psychiatrist diagnosed her as a narcissist?? But nothing ever came of that and she never got treatment. (Auto-disclaimer that people with NPD are not automatically abusers, but my sister absolutely is one lol). She is also a compulsive liar and has made up outlandish lies since she was a literal toddler (another thing the psych pinpointed immediately, but again nothing was ever done about it since she outright refuses treatment unless she can abuse or sell prescription drugs.) Back then it wasn’t as big of an issue. But now I see it as a red flag.

Today at 6am I woke up to a call from my mom and learned that my sister had finally been arrested for “domestic violence”. According to her, and this may not be the full story, her boyfriend accused her of cheating (again) (she is a cheater but to my knowledge has not cheated on Him specifically). They fought. She threw an empty soda can at him?? And then he called the police who apparently drug her out and arrested her. They said she was resisting arrest, she says she wasn’t. Acab per usual but my sister is the type to actually fight the cops when she’s in this mental state.

She did in fact threaten to “come back and slit (the cops’) throats”, they asked if she knows that threatening an officer is a felony, and she said “well then I threaten you with everything EXCEPT that,” which is a normal thing to say… and then they put her in a straight jacket bc she was acting out and threatening everyone. Lol.

My mom went to bail her out, $1,300 later my sister was screaming bloody murder in the car, yelling FUCK YOU in my mom’s face over and over, and got even more angry when my mom would not drive her to her bf’s house “to kill him”. Somehow she has decided that all of this was our mother’s fault? Bc she cannot ever be wrong ever and flips out when she doesn’t get her way. She is 24 years old.

They came home, I heard her scream outside, she came in screaming the same typical fuck you’s and all at my mom, I was honestly trying not to laugh bc I’m so desensitized to it by now and everything she says is ridiculous. Then she stormed out and started walking barefoot down the road claiming to be going to her bf’s house. Refused to get in my dad’s car when he found her. Then she stopped at the lake, texted a picture to her bf, told him essentially “it’s ok, you’re setting me free.” The picture was of his shoes by the lake; her intention being that she thought it was perfectly horrible to leave his stuff in the place where she “planned” to kill herself. Specifically to manipulate him and scare him. Bc guess what! She didn’t do anything. She just wanted him to think of having to go to the place where she “died” to retrieve his shoes and feel like everything is all his fault. Again… she didn’t do anything and it was all a threat to guilt trip him.

Bf called the cops AGAIN not even 12 hours into her bail djdgjd but this time the cops did nothing. She is now as okay as she can be I guess, and… we’ll just have to weather the aftermath storm bc she takes a long ass time to stop treating all of us like shit. NEEDLESS TO SAY, if they don’t fuckin break up after this they’re both lost causes and they can drive each other crazy for all I care.

We are all exhausted and stressed and I put up my own birthday decorations… but I do have a lemon cake. So that’s nice.

#queries #suicide #suicide mention #domestic violence #abuse #pls pls pls tell me if I need to tag this in any other way #anyways. yeah #I’m goin thru it but we stay sillayayyy #happy birthday I am shakily eating cake #ALSO I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH MY SISTER IS NOT NEARLY AS BIG AND BADASS AS SHE THINKS SHE IS LOL #she would literally never be able to kill a person or physically fight anyone enough to do so #so she’s all talk and Crazy Bitch Disease and nothing else

[jennrypan]

Sorry for not making it clear but what i meant is that this show didn't develop their female character properly by the writing. Your point sometime female character doesn't need to be revelant to the plot i agree sometime yes but there's also sometime where the female character need to shine

millie we never got any episode center around her character and her personality also character being moxxie wife. Millie she's voiced by a black woman

stella not only that she's inconsistent but her potrayal as abuser is really problematic. I believe they have no intention to make her character interesting. Also just because stella and stolas don't love each other doesn't mean stolas cheating is justified. Woman in the relationship always get the blame when their male partner cheated

verosika her design wasn't too bad and let me tell you this marinette VA voice this character. Verosika it's shpwn us that blitzo is a shitty boyfriend toward verosika so why not shown us that how their relationship was and validated her anger toward blitzo

Loona i will be honest she's not a great character at all Kat elliot from wendell and wild is her but with more better writing and character arc

Octavia poor kid have to deal with unhealthy marriage between stolas and stella. I get it stolas trying he's best but it's the bare minimum beside stolas really need to control he's hornyness around octavia she doesn't need to see that. Octavia she's actually can be a great character but the show doesn't put enough screentime for her

Oh no you phrased it well!! My point wasn't exactly to your statement, I was just saying it lol--

(Also ye I know Millies voiced by a black woman and Marinettes VA is Verosika! I love it so much--)

And you do make great points but the way I see it, I like the way Millie is, she's chaotic and always willing to give a helping hand, she's a secondary character, and with Stella, I like that she's a bitch and she's snooty, should Stolas have cheated? No, he could've gone about it differently but they're demons, demons don't exactly have morals so they do fucked up shit so of courses he gonna swing to the far left and make everything worse, they are a terrible couple and they should've never had this dispute in front of their younger daughter

Verosika has every right to hate Blitzo and I LOVE THAT, clearly she loved him (she has his name tattooed on her like) and he clearly fucked up!! I really like the fact that she genuinely seemed to love him, but then he screwed it up by being himself. I would love to see a flashback to them dating though, I wanna see what he did and see her reaction (I really like character expressions so I wanna see her like. Angry/sad??) Also..I wanna see more Verosika in general

And with Loona she's kinda okay for me?? Cuz I don't really dig too deep in what she says, cuz I'm very..okay with this Show 😭 Like I know she's not everyone's favorite but I like her tbh, (I like all the characters cuz they're all literally pieces of shit, like all of them cept for Octavia obvi) she's just there for me

Also OCTAVIA DESERVES TO BE IN A BETTER ENVIRONMENT!! Stolas is trying but he's still fucking it up!! Him publicly fighting Stella and being stuck on Blitzo in front of his daughter isn't great! He does clearly love her but still, its not healthy for kids to see how much their parents hate each other, also! I wanna see Stella's relationship with her daughter, I wanna see how they speak to each other, how Stella feels about her?? Like we can speculate and I've seen fanart that either make Stella a terrible mother or she tries to be good for Octavia (personally love that one better cuz it gives Stella nauce and heart. Like she's a bitch but she does love her daughter above all else)

Like. These characters could be expended on more but I'm more so interested in Stella and Octavias whole thing?? I LOVE Millie sm but those situations interest me more-

#j.p speaks #helluva boss #i still havent watched the last episode haha-- #and i wont cuz im lazy 💔 #im so luke warm on character analyse for them?? #i think im expecting so little into this show character wise it doesnt surprise me if its lacking 😭 #not to say its a bad show #i still like it but lmao

[cryonme]

—𝐈𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐫𝐦𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐬 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧

—Dallas Winston x fem!Curtis!reader

—summary: you and Dallas have an unspoken bond, and your boyfriend fucking sucks. also, your brothers love you a lot.

—word count: 1.8k

—tw: abusive relationship, swearing, blood

— a/n: can you tell I was in a toxic, abusive relationships with how many of these fics I write???? lol anywayyyyy. just watched the outsiders and fell back in love with the gang and hadddd to write this. enjoy, lovers! xo, miz

═════════════════

“(Y/N), open the goddamn door!” You didn’t even do anything, you did nothing wrong. You did nothing wrong yet here you were, bloody and shaking, not able to breathe properly while your brother tried to kick your door down.

It was fucked up.

“Calm down, Dar.”

“Don’t you tell me to calm down!”

All of this. All of this because your no good piece of shit boyfriend decided to beat the shit out of you in front of the wrong person.

Dallas fucking Winston. Of all people.

Dal had invited you to come to Buck’s, just for a couple of beers and maybe a round of pool, and, of course, you’d agreed. You two had always liked each other probably more than you should, but neither of you dared to make it too obvious, afraid of what the rest of the gang, and your boyfriend, would have to say about it. So you hung out a lot in secret, it’s not like the two of you were having sex or anything, you would just talk and drink, play some pool and fuck with some people at Buck’s, pulling pranks and whatnot. Sometimes you two would stay up after everyone had gone home, soft music playing from Dally’s record player, smoking cigarettes and talking about everything under the sun, but you were careful not to let your fear of your boyfriend slip past your lips, knowing that Dal would get angry, and tell your brothers and the rest of the gang, and they would absolutely kill him. You hated him, of course, but a small part of you felt like you couldn’t leave him, a weird sadness filled your chest at the thought.

You and Dallas were fucking around, you had taken a couple shots and were jabbing at each other with poolsticks when he walked in.

“Dal, we need to go to your room.” You said, your tone suddenly turning serious at the sight of the tall blond sauntering through the doors.

“What?! But-”

“Dallas, please.”

No one ever called him that, especially you. And with his full name coming out of your mouth and the panicked look in your eye, he knew you weren’t playing around.

“Yeah, alright. Come on.”

You nodded your head in a silent thank you and laced Dally’s fingers through yours, bringing your opposite hand up to grip onto his bicep, and the brunet boy sure didn’t miss the tight hold you had while your nails subtly dug into his flesh,

It was just as the two of you were headed upstairs when you were suddenly pulled back from Dally basically receiving whiplash from the severity of the tug.

“Well if it isn’t Dallas Winston and my girlfriend.” Your boyfriend sneered, bringing his clammy hand up to cling onto the back of your neck, squeezing so hard that you let out an involuntary whimper that made Dallas’ heart drop to his shoes.

Now, there weren't many people who were lucky enough to be loved by Dallas Winston, yet for some reason you were one of them. You got to see a side of him that not even Johnny Cade got to see. He was funny, soft, sweet, attentive, nothing like most people made him out to be.

But, Lord help the sorry motherfucker who decided to mess with you.

“Please…” You whimpered. Maybe it was a plea to your boyfriend, to let you go and show you mercy, just for tonight, or maybe it was a plea to Dally, begging him to help you and save you from the boy who was supposed to love you.

“Let her go, man.” Dallas drawled, one hand outstretched towards you and him in a gesture that you didn’t one any trouble, trying to stay calm for your sake.

“Why should I?” Your boyfriend laughed, tightening his grip. “So you can take her upstairs to that shitty room of yours and fuck her like the whore she is?”

“Now you’ve done it, punk.”

You wish you could remember exactly what happened from that point, but to be completely honest the whole thing was a fucking blur. You know that a couple of your boyfriend’s friends held Dally back once he lunged, and you knew your boyfriend had gotten you pretty good, and the moment you didn’t feel a pair of hands on you, you made a run for it, not looking back and not stopping until you basically crashed through your front door, unknowingly leaving a small trail of blood.

Soda and Darry had been on the couch when you arrived and both sprang up from their sitting positions when you ran through the living room and straight into your room, slamming the door and turning the lock.

“Shut the fuck up, Darrel!” You screeched, banging a fist against your door in retaliation.

“Not until you tell me what’s going on!”

“None of your goddamn business!”

“None of my goddamn business?!” His voice boomed. “You must be out of-”

You couldn’t take it, not a second more, so you flung the door open revealing your damaged state to your two elder brothers. Darry’s fist was raised, ready to pound on the door once more, and Soda’s arm was outstretched in an effort to stop him, and they both completely froze when they saw you. Apparently you were in worse shape than you originally thought.

“What happened?” Darrel asked, his voice soft but still firm, a slight frown hung on his face.

All you could do was shake your head. They’d kill him, all of them. Or at least try to. And you couldn’t risk any one of them getting hurt just because you can’t take a couple punches.

“What the fuck happened?” He demanded once more.

All you could do was shake your head as more tears gathered in your irises.

“Dar, she’s upset. Give her a second.” Soda soothed and Darry nodded, not ripping his eyes away from you. If you looked hard enough you could see they were filled with concern. Someone had hurt his baby sister, and he’d be damned if they were getting away with it.

“I’ll patch her up, alright? Go take a breather.” Soda gently coaxed the eldest away from your doorway and he obliged, turning his head and stomping away, leaving behind a bang as the front door slammed, causing you to jump.

Sodapop gave you a gentle smile and nodded towards the direction of the bathroom, urging you to follow him and you did. You decided to sit in the same spot he and the boys would always sit when you’d lend a hand in cleaning them up after fights or rumbles, so you hoisted yourself up on the counter.

Your brother was silent as he worked, and you tried your hardest not to make eye contact anytime you could feel his eyes linger on you, hoping you’d look up so he could say something.

“All done.”

You nodded and thanked him, sliding down from the counter so you could make your way into the living room to join Ponyboy and watch a couple cartoons before Darry got back and you’d have to have the conversation.

“(Y/n).” Sodapop’s voice stopped you before you could really leave the bathroom.

You halted your footsteps and turned, meeting your brother's misty blue eyes with your own.

“You know I uh, Pony and I have known for a while.”

You froze, your jaw falling slack and white hot nerves electrified your body.

“And I-” Soda choked on his words, clearing his throat before he continued. “I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you. I- I didn’t realize how bad it was, me and Pony only saw you guys yellin’ at the drive in. He grabbed your wrist and you hit him and, and I got up so fast to come and say somethin’ but Pony stopped me, he said this was somethin’ you had to do on your own. That, that you’d only get mad if we tried to get in the middle, we didn’t- we didn’t know (Y/n/n), I swear. I’m so-”

You cut him off with a hug, probably one of the tightest hugs you’d given any of your brothers since your mom and dad died, and Soda let out a breath of relief, hugging you back just as hard. Neither of you said anything, but really, you didn’t have to. You both knew what the hug meant, and there was no need to ruin it with talk.

You pulled away and both gave each other watery smiles. Soda laughed and lightly roughed up your hair and you swatted his hand away, a playful smile on your face.

Your nice moment with your brother was unfortunately interrupted by the front door nearly swinging off its hinges, revealing a very angry Darrel and concerned Dally.

“(Y/n), oh my god.”

“Your fucking BOYFRIEND?!”

Sodapop groaned and stepped in front of you, knowing how fragile you still were from the day’s events, and Ponybody scrambled up from the floor, tearing his eyes away from his cartoons to run to your aid, not really sure what was happening, but knowing it was his job to always protect his big sister.

“Now’s not the time, Dar, and you know that.”

The eldest Curtis opened his mouth to argue but stopped when he saw you. Cowering behind Soda with shaky hands, one gripped tightly in Pony’s, eyes wide with fear panic, and tears. His shoulders dropped and he sighed. “I’m sorry, (Y/n/n). Come on out.” You only shook your head and tightened your grip on Pony’s hand, making Darrel’s heart fall.

Dallas cleared his throat and stepped forward. His heart raced with his actions, not knowing how your older brother would react to you responding to Dallas over him, but you were scared, and he couldn’t just do nothing.

“(Y/n), sweetheart.” He said softly, approaching you beside Soda, and you immediately fell into him, tightening your hands around the material of his leather jacket and letting out every tear you’d been holding in the last couple of hours.

“I’m so scared of him, Dal.”

Dallas subtly swayed the two of you back and forth, one arm curled around your waist and the other cradling the back of your neck, his chin resting on the crown of your head.

“I know, doll.”

“Thought he was gonna kill me.”

Dally cursed and tightened his hold on you, turning his head to face the most confused trio of brother’s he’d ever seen.

Never had any of them seen him speak this softly, or even touch someone for this long without the intent of sex, and they were completely stunned.

“I’ll kill him.” Dally promised, his voice lowered an octave with intent and anger.

“No! I don’t want you to get hurt, Dally, please.” You begged through tears, almost like a child.

“Alright then.” Dally soothed, holding you closer. “Dally ain’t goin’ nowhere. Gonna stay right here, yeah?”

You nodded and Dally continued to look at the three brothers, and the brunet boy holding you in his arms didn’t even have to flick an eyelid in signal for them to be out the door, chests huffed and fists clenched, to defend their sister’s honor.

═════════════════

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#the outsiders fanfiction #the outsiders x reader #the outsiders imagine #the outsiders #dallas winston #darry curtis #ponyboy curtis #sodapop curtis #curtis reader #Johnny cade #steve randle #two bit mathews #dallas winston x reader #dallas winston imagine #dally x reader #dallas winston fanfiction

[xaibaugrove]

Everyone in the Krew is Problematic

I was inspired to go on this rant by someone who recently brought up a question in a server I’m in, asking why so many people in the fandom seem to hate Mako and Makorra and why. This wouldn’t be the first time I defend Mako and it most likely won’t be the last, but it might be the first time I tear him and everyone else in the Krew down in the process, only to bring them back up. Hear me out though.

I think I’ve totally accepted that a lot of people in this fandom will always hate Mako and that I will have to perpetually defend him, I understand that this is the relationship I’ve chosen with this world. But what I still will never understand are the reasons why people hate/dislike him because compared to how much they love other characters in the Krew who honestly aren’t that much better than him (in some cases, even worse!), it doesn’t make any sense.

Let me also preface this by saying, I love these characters with all my heart and soul, probably more than I should love fictional characters, but this is the life I live and with that being said, I am going to tear them apart just to prove a point. Okay, here we go.

MAKO

Most of his detractors list the usual criticisms, which are valid when isolated. He cheated on Asami, he lied to Korra, he was a terrible boyfriend and essentially he treated the women he claimed to love or care about horribly. Gee, it’s almost like the man was a teenager with no experience in having long-lasting, healthy relationships and was raised in the streets by gangmembers while doing anything to survive and provide for his younger sibling after seeing his parents killed right in front of him and suddenly being orphaned…

I think Mako has been torn down enough, so I won’t get too deep into the tearing down part for him. It really does baffle me how someone can claim to be woke and not comprehend how someone coming from poverty could possibly be a product of their environment. Like, does everyone think that poor people automatically have hearts of gold and turn out like Little Orphan Annie? Why are people surprised that when someone has a shitty life, they might do shitty things?

Also, sooo many people love Zuko, who actively tried to cause harm to Aang, Katara and Sokka numerous times, and sympathize with his troubled past. But like, sure Zuko had an abusive father and his mother peaced out of his life for whatever reasons but at least he had his uncle. Mako had his parents for maybe 8 years before they were murdered in front of him and then had...no one for the next 10 years? Except for Bolin, sure, but no other parental figure in his life. Dude literally had to become him and his brother’s own parent and joined a gang to survive, and after all that, the worst he does is acts as a bad boyfriend toward Korra and Asami and he is instantly thrown to the wolves. Something doesn’t add up. It’s just...I don’t get it.

Yes, the way he treated people was bad, but people can grow? That’s a thing humans can do. And he was a teenager, my god. No, we cannot allow our past to be an excuse for how we treat others, but we have to be aware that there is a growth process to being human. And being human in and of itself, isn’t pretty. You think Mako is problematic? Don’t get me started on your fave.

KORRA

Ok, I love this woman to death but she is ridiculously problematic. She pursued someone in a relationship and essentially forced Mako to cheat on Asami by kissing him against his will, that’s already pretty awful and shows a lack of empathy on her part, also kissing people without their consent is no bueno. But also I just have to say it for the people who might not know this. One of the fundamental reasons why Makorra didn’t work was because KORRA WAS ABUSIVE. Okay? It wasn’t just that Mako was inadequate at relationships and didn’t know how to people, it wasn’t that she was secretly confused and wanting Asami the entire time (biphobia at it’s best) one of the main problems in the pairing was that Korra was crazy abusive towards Mako. Seriously, why don’t I see this more often in those discussions??

If we need examples, I have dozens. Honestly, it’s really easy to see how terrible Korra was to Mako, I’d actually argue that she treated him worse than he treated her. I mean, they were both terrible to one another, but in Korra’s case she went through the motions of being completely infatuated with your first teenage crush, getting with said crush, then crashing and burning once you realize that you have no idea how to treat a romantic partner so after the butterflies wear off you subject them to all the wonderful aspects of your anger issues. Not only did she scream at Mako during every argument they had, she also threatened him with bodily harm if she got really angry. Remember how their relationship crashed and burned in Book 2? Here are the things that Korra did during that time. Let me reiterate, this was not okay.

Mako is visibly shaken by this!

This woman burst into her boyfriend’s place of work and violently kicked his desk out from in front of him with all his coworkers present. That is not normal behavior. That is a red flag. And after she came back, had amnesia or whatever and forgot they broke up after that scene, let’s not forget that Mako was legitimately Afraid to break up with her again. Korra made her partner frightened that they might suffer bodily harm if they upset her. Again, and I can’t stress this enough, this is not okay!

The little scene in Book 3 when Korra is lifting Mako like 100 feet off the ground with airbending while he’s screaming in fear just to make Asami laugh is cute, right? I’ll admit, I loved that little moment too, it’s one of the only instances of Korrasami development that we got, but also, there were sooo many things wrong with that scene lol. Not only does Korra terrify Mako for literally no reason, it’s also sort of just her continuing to exercise some degree of power over him for her own amusement. Almost like a subtle reminder to him saying, “I am stronger than you in every way and I can break your femur like a twig if I wanted to… but I won’t, so look how much fun we’re having!”

Now of course, there are reasons why Korra acts like this. She was isolated for almost her entire life and never learned how to treat people and be around people. The Avatar is human because they must live amongst the people they protect and that helps them develop empathy and cherish life. The White Lotus deprived her of that fundamental aspect of her duty as the Avatar and it showed throughout the beginning of the series. Clearly, she was young, didn’t see how her actions could negatively affect others and hurt the feelings of not just her partner but also friends and family (she was really awful towards a lot of people in her life!). But as the series went on, we see her having less outbursts and learning to control her temper more.

One can only assume that she does not have the same behavior with Asami because for one, I don’t think Asami would play that shit, she seems like she would electrocute a bitch in a heartbeat and not hesitate if needed, but also Korra is not the same shitty partner she used to be as a teenager. Again, kids do stupid things. Adults do stupid things. And we learn and we grow. Korra will probably make some more mistakes in her relationship with Asami. I don't think anyone can have one bad relationship and suddenly learn all the lessons they can from it and have a perfect one the next go around. I can totally picture Korra losing her temper and raising her voice at Asami if she gets frustrated and forgets who she’s dealing with. Managing anger issues is hard, I know this from experience, and it doesn’t magically get easier. Of course, if Korra does pop off, Asami would definitely put her in her place because she’s a bad bitch who doesn’t take anyone’s shit, next character.

ASAMI

You know her, you love her, you fantasize about her and you probably have her on your list of fictional characters you would totally bang if you had the chance (I know I do), yes, even your best girl is problematic. It’s interesting to me that a lot of people sympathize with Asami and very few openly criticize her (so few that I’ve never seen anyone say a bad thing about her). What’s there to criticize though? The poor girl was cheated on by Mako, had her feelings disregarded by Korra, who claimed to be her friend but pursued her then-boyfriend behind her back and then made up for it by simping for her for the rest of her life? Also her mom was murdered when she was just 6 years old, her father threatened to kill her once and physically abused her, then died right after they started repairing their relationship, essentially making her an orphan at the ripe age of 22. Suffice it to say, Asami has been through it.

So, how could she be problematic, you ask? Why, of course, through the classic Bryke technique of romance progression in storylines called Kissing People Without Their Consent

To be honest, I did gloss over this with Korra, simply because there were sooo many other issues with that woman and I just couldn’t go through every single one in as much detail but that doesn’t negate how serious this whole sneak attack kissing thing is. Sure, Asami is very emotional and lonely and sort of desperate too, (it's a little sad, really) but Mako is clearly uncomfortable and completely caught off guard by the kiss. This is also the second time this happens to him in the series! There are a couple factors that might contribute to why Asami does this and acts this way, maybe Korra’s general awfulness rubbed off on her (don’t make a dirty joke) but this is still wrong.

AND that’s...pretty much it. Kissing people without their permission is a big no no, though. Not wanting to gloss over that, but Asami really is a good person who just did a not-so-great thing. Getting burned by Mako twice probably made her a little less inclined to be as forward with anyone though, and it looks like she now takes her time and is patient in her relationship with Korra. It even seems like Asami is the only person Korra is afraid to upset, as Korra does seem more gentle and calm when around her. And who knows? Maybe Asami living a life where a majority of the time she got whatever she wanted when she wanted it might have also influenced her to be more assertive or even imposing within her relationships.

If anything, those three fools getting into relationships with each other just showed how not ready they were to be in relationships in the first place and also how not okay they were.

BOLIN

Originally I titled this as “Everyone in the Krew is problematic (except Bolin)” but then I remembered that Bolin totally kissed a woman without her consent so I deleted the shit out of that!

This asshole looks genuinely pleased with himself after essentially assaulting Ginger. Not a good look.

Sure, Bolin is baby. He will always be baby to me. But that does not erase the fact that he also actively supported a fascist dictator. Not only was the kissing without consent thing bad, but there’s also that. No matter how many times people around him warned him about the fact that he was on the wrong side of things, that he was helping someone who was putting people into concentration camps...Bolin wanted to believe the best of Kuvira. He ignored obvious signs that the woman was a dictator committing human rights violations like crazy and you know, there’s gotta be a reason for that too.

Maybe Bolin wanted to feel like he was doing something good for once. When you think about it, with his role as the comic relief in the Krew, and sort of constantly being infantilized by his older brother, I wouldn’t be surprised if the man developed some insecurity in his ability to do anything good or useful for anyone without screwing it up in some way. In Kuvira’s army, it seemed like he was actually taken seriously, he felt like he was doing something that mattered. Korra had being the Avatar, Asami had her business and mindblowing philanthropy (honestly, her ability to be as charitable as she is profitable is insane) and Mako had his police work (ACAB, tho). Bolin had...the role of being a joke. A superficial actor. A former pro-bending meathead.

Bolin lived his entire life following after his brother that once they were adults and Mako finally decided to live his own life for once, it left Bolin completely lost. And lost young men are perfect recruits for fascists.

So, in conclusion, my whole reasoning behind destroying the integrity of my favorite characters is to prove a huge point. All of these characters are problematic. They have flaws, some bigger than others (looking at you, Korra. Just...wow), but ultimately, even if your fave is problematic... that’s okay. A lot of people, mostly younger people it seems, are really obsessed with being right about everything that they do and stan. And that’s a wonderful thing, so much change has come about by the younger generations calling out people who do fucked up shit, don’t want or try to improve, and get away with it. But it’s also caused a lot of people to be unforgiving and completely unwilling to acknowledge when people do improve and try to be better.

Personally, I love my problematic Krew because having issues that you’re constantly working on internally is human. It’s human to make mistakes, it’s human to grow from those mistakes. And it’s inspiring to me, who is wholly imperfect, to see myself reflected in fictional characters who aren’t perpetuating unrealistic ideals of human nature, characters who are messy, crazy and ultimately human.

As one of my favorite manga artists and queen of impeccable character creation Rumiko Takahashi once said:

“I think that perfect people are not very interesting.”

And I will always wholeheartedly agree.

#long post #rant #tlok #the legend of korra #korra #asami sato #mako #bolin #avatar: the legend of korra #back on my random bullshit i guess

[muhgie]

tw sexual assault

I get so much anxiety about if other people think that i’m too weird. I overanalyze my social interactions so much and its odd because i rarely used to get social anxiety. Generalized anxiety was more of a constant, like i was pretty much always in fight or flight mode. Nowadays i’ll go over something i’ve said and pick out all of the ways that i could have communicated better, wondering how the other person interpreted me, worrying that i was misinterpreted or that they were secretly judging me. I have a hard time trusting people and that makes me closed off to others….which is fine i guess because unless i want a relationship with someone, then i don’t necessarily care about what they think of me. So its like whyyy am i getting anxious about being misinterpreted?

I know that I tend to assume that people are acting in bad faith a lot. I put defenses up before knowing what a person’s intentions are because its easier to protect myself that way. If I’m always on guard, then the risk of being tricked or manipulated is lower, right? And it makes me feel like I’m victimizing myself by acting like i know that everyone is out to get me. But it’s very hard because i’ve had people take advantage of my trust. I wish that i could just say “fuck them” and move on but the wounds are just so deep. There is so much that I still haven’t processed yet, so i don’t even know how to heal. My therapist told me to write unsent letters to people that have hurt me. I wrote a couple and they helped. But when I went in to write one of them in particular, I had so much ready to go but once i got there i could barely think of anything to write down. All i could do is sit there and cry. I could barely even describe what happened to my therapist. I still haven’t really. I’ve only ever told Marc and my best friend about it and it wasn’t very detailed because, again, haven’t even touched the surface of that stuff myself. The pain is so heavy, but its like I’m unable to process any of it. I think about it every fucking day :( its like i never even left it. I just want to belt it out so bad. “I loved you i loved you and you didnt even care. You laughed at me when i told you and you kept me around for your own gain.” and here i am, feeling a crushing amount of guilt for hurting them. it follows me everywhere. worrying myself sick that i looked like the bad guy for putting my mental health first. i could have handled it better. i know. but i needed to help myself. I ask myself “Did I do the right thing?” and i say yes but quietly, and my voice trembles as say it

It gets so bad sometimes. I dread socializing with most people nowadays because i can’t see how they would accept me. And I want to screammmmm because I know that I’m worthy of love and acceptance!!!! I have so many people in my life that genuinely care about me!!!! Like!!!! Not everyone is going to hurt me!!! I don’t matter to most people and thats good!!! And yet I still place myself at second-best for everyone. Its so frustrating. l deserve to be my most authentic self god dammit

I think about how shitty Hayley was to me when we were friends and sometimes i legit sit there and say, “well maybe I misinterpreted what happened and she wasn’t actually being shitty. maybe i incorrectly thought that what she did to me was abusive.” THAT BITCH PUNCHED ME UNTIL I GOT BRUISES!!! SHE PULLED MY SHIRT UP IN FRONT OF PEOPLE WHEN I WASNT EXPECTING IT!!!! THAT SHIT ISNT OKAY. Hayley made me to fucking uncomfortable soooo often, she really had no regard for how others felt around her. At least not for me lol. And yeah she was traumatized too or whatever but fuck you bro you mentally tortured me throughout our entire “friendship.” And then she tries to crawl back into my life in the saddest ways possible. Following me around at the gym. Calling my mom to try and contact me. Getting her ex boyfriend who worked with me to try and get me to message her. Sorry i don’t exist to make you feel better about yourself. fuck herrr

i really need to be nicer to myself. i’ve felt empowered to speak my truth to my mom about my stepdad’s abuse, and if i can do that i know that i can get through whatever im going through right now. i craved my moms validation and i spoke my truth about my abuse and got it. The difference is that i don’t want validation from these other people, I’m just…really angry at them. A “How dare you take advantage of me?” type of a thing. God am I just going through the same cycle of denial, anger, then whatever comes after? I know that I have to allow myself to feel my emotions or whatever, but anger is the most difficult one for me to feel…. Why cant it be easier lol

#txt #writing this was very therapeutic…i feel kind of better

[chrispaulcolfer]

thoughts on hummelberry? i hate them and i feel that kurt was never more ruined as a character than when he was with her.

It's funny you should ask, dear non. I just got into a heated rant with my spouse about hummelberry today. Mostly my spouse listening to me rant, because of the recent scene I reblogged? Yes, the one in season 4 where Kurt puts Rachel in her place by popping her inflated ego.

Let's preface this by saying that hummelberry does have good moments - Rachel coming to Kurt's defense to get their football boyfriends to stand up to Karofsky in season 2, the speech she gives in Swan Song, and then the one she gives in season 5's "A Katy or a Gaga". There are times where she steps up to the plate and is a good friend to him for a change. And of course they're cute when they break onto the Wicked stage in season 2, the Christmas elf outfits in season 5, the excitement over being in Vogue and then going to that showcase with Santana in season 4. There is potential! But they missed the mark by making Rachel awful when it comes to Kurt. "Best Gay" for example? Shut up and go sit down.

I loathe this friendship. I hate it so damn much. The writers could've made it into a great friendship if they put time and energy into character development instead of needing Kurt to seem relevant in season 3 by attaching him to Rachel's side the entire time out of NO WHERE. Oh wow, two people into Broadway? They totes need to be bff's now for that reason alone haha. Give me a break.

Let's see - in season 2 when Kurt tells them all he's leaving for Dalton, Rachel's more concerned about him being competition then the actual problem of why he's leaving. Then she goes for Blaine after knowing Kurt's feelings about him, but lol who cares because she may get a boyfriend who will keep up with her vocally. Kurt needs some humble pie, because she gets what she wants in the end always, haha.

In season 3, she laughs at him after he chooses her to be his Juliet because him playing anyone masculine is hilarious. Also in season 3 she runs against him for student president, then ruins his winning by cheating - he said he was going to cheat himself, why would she add onto that and make it even more obvious? Oh right, guilty conscious. After Kurt gets his NYADA letter, she makes it about herself by ruining his excitement. When Kurt is against her marrying Finn so young, she tells him that he's just jealous (remember at the time gay couples marrying in Ohio wasn't an option - so yes, he's totally jealous that he can't just marry someone for the hell of it). Then the bullshit of him not getting into NYADA after giving a kick ass performance but she does after harassing Carmen for WEEKS. How the fuck would Kurt consider that fair?! Oh, right, he's always the bigger person who is just happy she gets to go live her dream. Duh. OH and remember when Rachel mentions wanting to see Kurt in a bridesmaid dress???? 😌 get fucked.

Then we hit season 4, and her ditching Kurt for two fake friends who become her echo chamber. These new friends badmouth Kurt and she can only timidly disagree with them but then gets hyped on them hyping her up - and then they ditch her at midnight madness, KARMA OR WHAT?! Speaking of, she went out on a limb and told Kurt that he only got into NYADA because Carmen knew he was friends with her. Not his talent. Not his moving performance on the spot. No, he's clearly not in her league and he should be honored to be bff's with her because that comes with perks, lol. Then when he beats her fair and square, it's a damn narcissistic pity party all over again (oh woe am I, I didn't win, I'm just not gonna be an actress and perform anymore because I suck. Pity me). Not to mention that she asked Brody to move in WITHOUT consulting Kurt at all, which lead to unwanted flashing that Kurt did NOT consent to. (Also how is it that Kurt gets a tiny promotion only because he pulled Rachel into it? Why couldn't he have done that for himself? Why does his success lead back to her this season? Fuck you glee.)

Season 5, she manipulates and gaslights the situation regarding her and Santana's feud by calling Kurt a traitor, "replacing her best gay" with Elliott, and basically stating THEY (Kurt AND Santana) kicked her out when she made that decision on her own. She then ignores Kurt telling her NOT to go to LA and does it anyway because she's so bored of Broadway now apparently. Then Chris' episode of only showing up to Kurt's Peter Pan gig because he called her out on being a shitty friend. If Kurt hadn't done that, she wouldn't have been there (Santana might not have been either, lbr). ALSO THE FUCKING BASH EPISODE?! Again, she only feels bad because Kurt almost DIES and then it's "bff's forever".

Season 6, I didn't pay much attention to. But I do know that while Santana was going off on him with that "rant", Rachel just stood there making faces. Faces that suggested that she agreed with a few of the awful things Santana was saying. And then she got upset when Kurt offered Jane & Mason advice that was actual good TEACHER advice to do better which boy Jane and Mason took to heart and bettered their performance. I do know that Kurt got shit on a lot in this season as well, even Mercedes had to come back to kiss poor whittle Rachel's ass and downplay Kurt's contribution. Like what the fuck is that about. Plot wise season 6 is trash anyway, so, no shock in reality.

I have a theory that has decided majority of those who enjoy hummelberry only want to be in a threesome between Colfer and Lea and that's it. Because they're both pretty people (Rachel in season 4? Hell yes, please more of that to look at, thanks). The fundamentals of this friendship is messed up, and I consider it toxic and emotionally/mentally abusive. There's no growth between them. It's just Kurt being the better and bigger person, while Rachel continues being self-involved until Kurt snaps then it's suddenly 'oh I can't lose him quick gaslight maneuver'. Even when there's consequences, she makes up for it by the end of an episode, but then is back to her usual ways by the next one and onward.

#anti hummelberry #anti rachel berry #answered #long post

[jonathanssweatercollection]

stranger things opinions !!

(tagged by the lovely @pusheen1802 thank u for taggin me !!!)

my beautiful cinnamon roll too good for this world fave: JONATHAN BABY BOY BYERS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE I WOULD KILL A MAN FOR YOU

my trash-shit fave: to a certain extent, hopper. s1 hopper is a fave but he’s also a himbo but still fun and interesting. s2 hopper is a dick at times and didn’t deserve to be forgiven so quickly for lying to everybody and restricting el so much. s3 hopper was literally abusive, killed russians indiscriminately, threatened children, abused his power as a cop and had a shitty mario moustache.

my I love to hate them fave: tommy, carol and nicole (even if she makes stupid pouty faces when mocking people). and kinda brenner

my I hate to love them fave: no one??? either they’re a dick or i love them there isn’t an in-between

my I wouldn’t piss on them if they were on fire non-fave: billy; i need not say more. axel from kali’s gang bc ya know he used a lot of ableist and derogatory language and almost killed a child (or at least threatened to). and obviously brenner for obvious reasons

my I didn’t care about them either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about them now I can’t stand them non-fave: dustin; i still love him but he’s been turned into such basic and boring meme fodder. i miss when he was a well-rounded character who’s pov i could understand like in s1 (maybe s2 if i’m not counting the bullshit wannabe “love triangle” with max and lucas) but he really is just a “big fun” kinda archetype for comic relief

my I could take them or leave them kinda non-fave: erica murray. they’ve turned into tropes gone wrong (“sassy black girl”/“precociously mean sibling” and “creator’s pet”/“shipper with an agenda” which are just 1. unrealistic and 2. incredibly creepy)

my I will go down with this ship and I won’t put my hands up and surrender, there will be no white flag above my door. I’m in love and always will be fave ship: stoncy and jancy. obviously

my they’re cute together and I dig them but I’m not all that terribly invested kinda fave ship: uhh idk maybe jopper ?? i’d be more invested if hopper wasn’t such a dick so much of the time (especially to joyce and the children) like pre-mid-s2 hopper was prime beefcake boyfriend material but then he just. stopped being like that (other than at the very end of s2 lol)

my I didn’t care about this ship either way at first but the fandom makes such a big deal about it now I can’t stand it non-fave ship: byeler. this is going to make more mutuals block me lmao. fandom has just kinda warped mike and will into these cookie-cutter fanon characters that fujoshi can froth over, while baby-fying will (even though he canonically hates that) and vilifying mike and making him seem stupid and repressed (like hello steve is right there /j) also there’s the whole hating el and infantilising her AS WELL as will bc she gets in the way of the ship. i still really like byeler!!! but fandom goes out of its way to make me dislike it lol

#stranger things #mine #abuse #mentions of it i guess

[thatblondeperson]

So I learnt from that Tim Drake Guy's tumblr that Steph is a bully and abusive with Tim is that true. I ask since I know you seem to agree with a lot of the thoughts expressed on that blog. Can you help me find some examples of Tim/Steph comics. I was going to get YJ but the same tumblr blog says it's bad

So I want to preface with some very solid advice I've learned from being in fandom. It's really hard to learn anything from any blog because so much of it is opinion based, that the line between headcanon and canon gets far too muddied too often, and there's also always going to be biases that come from very personal spaces. It's important to take everything that every blog says ESPECIALLY in the DC fandom, with a very large grain of salt because half the fandom really doesn't actually seem to source their information with anything other than out of context panels, shitposts, or their own perfect ideals of what they want to gleam from the pages of each comic. It's all interpretive, and I'm sure that sounds a little bit petty, but I'm adding myself in here too because I have my own opinions separate from others, despite my firm ideology in staying as close to canon as I possibly can.

As far as that blog, I actually strayed away from them because I no longer agreed with a lot of what was being said. It got to the point where it was getting very unnecessarily negative all the time, and I want no part in this ship war that drives practically every bit of drama in the Tim fandom. I think that there is a lot of merit to some of the opinions on that blog, and they're clearly an expert on Tim in many ways. I knew them personally, so I can attest to that. But I think they also read only what they WANT to read on every page, and I think that makes for a lot of gaps where misinformation can leak in. That got filled with a lot of straight up wrong assessments of Stephanie Brown, and unfortunately that blog was already prime traffic for antis to spew unnecessary hate, so once the blog itself got on board, I tapped out.

No, Stephanie is not an abuser or a bully. I think tumblr throws around the word abuse far too casually. At most, Steph teases Tim, but never to a malicious or purposefully hurtful extent. She pokes at him, just like you would with a best friend. He barely even protests. A simple "Steph..." every now and again, but he even teases her back often and jokes with her. She's not an abuser, in fact, she herself is a victim of severe abuse in her childhood. Her flirting at the beginning of her and Tim's relationship is a bit intense, but she's 15, and doesn't know how to catch his attention. Her boyfriend was clearly way older than her and did not treat her well, her father abused her mother, and she was sexually harassed by her father's friends. She's never seen a healthy relationship to know how to act. Once they get together, she mellows out and is actually very compassionate and kind with Tim, and especially supportive.

A lot of haters throw around all this terrible stuff she did.

They say she stole Robin from Tim. He stepped away from the mantle, and she thought she caught him cheating, and Bruce opened up the opportunity for her.

They highlight a time when she almost blew Tim up. Bruce told her to do something drastic to force Tim to be a better Robin. Should she have thought it through? Yes. But she was young, and still desperate to prove herself.

Steph is a loose canon throughout a lot of her appearances. She doesn't always think before she acts, and that is one of her major flaws. She gets into trouble often, and that causes a lot of tension between her and Tim, often from him becoming overprotective of her.

Steph starts out fairly cynical in the beginning and softens up over time. After the explosion stunt with Tim, she does get her act together and she goes through a fantastic character arc where she really improves upon herself. She becomes a beacon of hope, but she really already was one. She's always been a source of light for Tim. She's a constant tether for him throughout their relationship, and she constantly bringing him back to reality. I think their dynamic is really great, and it does hurt me a lot how often she gets dragged through the mud now. It's tumblr, what can you do?

It's also interesting to me how often Steph is called out for being the unhealthy one, and they never talk about how Tim was the shitty boyfriend way more often:

Kept his identity from her but didn't respect keeping hers private

Kissed her when he was dating someone else at the time (he's actually kinda known for subtle two-timing, but this is hardly brought up by fans)

Essentially stalked her for a while

Often told her she needed to stop being Spoiler (overprotective nature yes...but still)

Interesting how the relationship is only toxic because of Steph. Hell she even gets shit for getting upset that Greta straight up tried to kill her in Young Justice, because they think it was selfish of her that she was desperate to learn Robin's identity. Yeah sorry...murder vs wanting to know your crushes name? Which is worse?

I'm also not going to sit here and demand that everyone love Steph. It's ok that people don't like her, I could give 2 shits, but if they're gonna spew hate, I'd prefer it be rooted in truth. Some of what I see written about her is just so so wrong...there's a trend in anti culture to even write her as Tim's rapist which YIKES. That's so beyond a healthy amount of dislike for a character.

Anyway, comic recs!!!

Detective Comics 647-648. (First appearance of Steph/Spoiler with classic "love at first brick" moment.)

Robin 57-65 (First date issue which is the cutest thing ever. Robin does a little flip at the end because he's so happy. And the chronology of Steph being pregnant which Tim was supportive of the whole time. Super sweet)

Robin 100-104 (Steph gets sick and Tim brings her soup. Lots of cute domestic moments, and you get more into Steph's past)

Robin 111 (more about Steph's past with Tim being super supportive, also the infamous piano issue which is a personal favorite of mine)

Robin 116 (very cute moments after Tim forgets his bday and everyone, Steph included, surprises him)

Robin 119 (supportive bf Tim, strikes again)

Robin 120 (Steph being an amazing supportive gf)

Batgirl 8 (Steph's run, where she and Tim collide again for the first time in a long time. Awkwardness and tension ensues, Tim tries to make a move)

Red Robin 10 (more crossover, very fun. More awkwardness and tension)

Convergence Batgirl (Not the best run, but a nice bit of closure for the pre flashpoint universe. Very sweet and wholesome.)

There's way more that I could list but I'm awful with issue numbers tbh. I know the stories, but I don't have the catalogue memorized. Better people than me have probably made a masterlist of TimSteph comics lol

I don't think you should let any blog turn you away from any particular series. I think if you wanna try out the new YJ, go for it!! I'm very cynical to anything published post 2011, but YJ is the only thing I've consistently read that's NEW, in years. I find it fun. Is it the best? No, not by miles, and it gets stuck with a lot of nonsensical filler often. But it's still a very cute and fun run.

I hope this ask gave you a lot of good info! I also recommend the very long post that should be just below this that goes into a lot of fandom misconceptions about Stephanie brown with more picture examples to highlight everything. Thanks for the ask, anon! I hope you have a lovely time reading these comics and hopefully many more!!

🖤💜❤😊😊😊❤💜🖤

#TimSteph #stephanie brown #tim drake #robin iii #robin iv #spoiler #batgirl #red robin #dc comics #batfamilly #batfam #personal #ask tbp

[heartate-aa]

good morning! raphael trying to blame me for this situation not being private is a reach and super shitty and they are clearly not sorry for literally ANYTHING with the way they worded their doc. they are literally unapologetic and it SHOWS. it’s so obvious that they’re not fucking sorry at all. this is literally just about trying to save their fucking ass and make me look bad lmao. lying and being like “well i never tried to silence her, i offered to talk to her and she refused, the door is still open” like that’s such a weak way to be like oh well im not silencing her as if you didn’t tell me to “shut up” and “shut the fuck up” or “let’s not do this” as if that gives me any room to speak. you constantly blamed me for “deciding when/where conversations ended” and constantly made me feel like i was being fucking punished FOR EVERYTHING THAT I DID. me not wanting to talk about something because i was getting very upset and then frustrated is a valid reason to not wanting to talk, but YOU would push me and guilt trip me by saying “oh, so when i want to talk, fuck my feelings, but you get to decide when we do/don’t talk” like. i understand how this might be hypocritical because i used to force you to patch things up with me immediately (which i admitted to in my first imgur) but i learned and stopped. i don’t think, at least from my perspective and im sorry if i’m wrong, that i continued this behavior. i really don’t think i kept trying to force you to talk. if arguments got strong on, i feel that it’s because you  brought them up. i literally did anything to avoid fighting with you at all costs but literally everything i did would just piss you off and i just can’t fucking win lol. 

it’s so unfair to fucking use caps from someone vent twitter where, by the way, a lot of the shit i tweet out of anger/being sad are???????????????? twisted out of context and it’s so fucked up because 85% of the time im having a god damn meltdown and im spiraling????? you’re so fucked up for this, especially you ki you’re literally like. the most two-faced snake i have EVER met like dude. you’re so fucked. up. how do you fucking sit there with a good and clean conscience without guilt for constantly capping people’s vents and sharing them around or talking about them to other people like? you’re so gross for this hello??? you’re a fucking adult and you shit on people for 2014 tumblr behavior but you literally capping people’s shit like this is so. 2014 tumblr. grow up. grow. up. you literally act so fucking nice behind ppl’s backs and pull shit like this and i feel so fucking stupid for defending you to raphael so hard when they shat on you about savage/extreme raiding and yes i have caps for this because i’m sure they didn’t show you everything lmao. you are literally. so childish dude. like dude??? it’s so fucking disgusting of you to pretend to be my friend and just like, sit in my vent account to what, just watch me??????? like no one ever made u fucking follow me on my private twitters and like it’s so gross that u’d take my shit out of context and and run with them and twist them and then not even fucking ask me like i get? you having avpd but that’s literally no excuse for how u acted or what ur doing rn like lmao man you’ve hated me for so long and it fucking shows and it’s so rich considering you admitted to other people that you thought raphael was treating me like shit and that you had your own issues with them. it’s so. rich. lmao i feel so dumb ever defending you when you like ?? just literally have done everything time and time again to do shit like this. like i don’t think im in the wrong for fucking ????????? venting about my relationship or wanting to seek out advice for it and you literally lying saying that i TRIED to make raphael look bad to you when i literally TRIED SO HARD TO DO THE OPPOSITE and that’s why i didn’t give you caps bc i didn’t want it to blow harsher than it TRULY was but yeah no i have caps and they’re yours. don’t worry. and like. you’re so fucking sick in the head to put this on me saying “this isn’t a new realization” AS IF ??????????? I WASN’T SITTING IN DENIAL OVER HOW RAPHAEL TREATED ME BECAUSE I KEPT GETTING GUILT TRIPPED AND MANIPULATED AND I GENUINELY. WAS SO IN LOVE WITH THEM LIKE YOU HAVE NO IDEA. HOW MUCH SHITTY BEHAVIOR I TURNED MY EYES AWAY FROM AND ALLOWED TO SLIDE BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS NORMAL, I THOUGHT WE COULD WORK THROUGH ANYTHING. I DESPERATELY WANTED THINGS TO WORK BECAUSE I LOVED THEM AND I DIDNT WANT TO GIVE UP AND WALK AWAY BECAUSE IM STUPID AND SOFT AND I WANTED. THINGS TO WORK. WITH MY BOYFRIEND LOL. i was in denial. for so. long. even with so many fucking people trying to tell me “this behavior is shitty, it’s abusive” i didnt fucking listen and i stayed there so fuck you with this victim blaming bullshit and saying “this isn’t a new realization for her and her eyes aren’t just suddenly open” like. lol. that’s so???????????????? victim blamey you’re fucking sick for it. 

anyway that’s all i wanted to say for now. i’m gonna respond properly to everything and it might take me a few weeks bc i have to go through so much shit so. if anyone else has questions in the mean time feel free. but my spoons are sparse.

#ooc. #tbd. #abuse cw - #ask to tag

[reversewerewolf]

i started this in like october and was gonna do EVERY CHARACTER but since it’s been sitting in my drafts for five months, it’s time to accept that’ll never happen and just post what i’ve got lol

by popular demand singular suggestion and because i’m procrastinating: rating hades characters. spoilers below.

ZAGREUS: the all-time best boy. his ratio of snarky to respectful is ideal. i love a man with that level of determination and skill. he loves animals, based on loving his dog and trying to pet wildlife (to his detriment). he hates his job and can’t take instruction to save his life, which means he’s relatable. his jokes are groan-inducing, occasionally painfully so. who doesn’t love a man with heterochromia? smarmy face that you hate to love. he doesn’t know what birds are and he decided to escape from an inescapable place with absolutely no plan whatsoever so i’m tentatively categorizing him as a himbo. 10/10.

HADES: first impression: i would kill you with my bare hands if i could. i became more sympathetic as i got to know his motivations and his tragedy, and i do love that he’s his wife’s doormat. one time i got hit the moment the timer started in erebus and he barely managed to sputter “immediate failure!” through laughter, and couldn’t taunt me at the end because he was cracking up. he’s hot because he’s like 20 feet tall and beefy, but i can’t forgive the child abuse and the all around shit personality. 3/10, at least he’s starting to try.

NYX: the perfect mom. she could definitely lift a chariot off of her children when they get run over, or just in general (but why else would she?). she supports her children even in dangerous endeavors that risk drawing the ire of her shitty kind-of husband. gorgeous, elegant, and soft spoken, but might kill you if you fuck up too bad. i hesitate to say “MILF” but i know a lot of you are thinking it, so it’s worth addressing. the goth in me is going apeshit over her aesthetic, but i keep laughing at the skulls on her chest piece that look like they’re vomiting and distraught about it. 10/10. please adopt me.

CHARON: i love characters with masked/obscured faces, and he’s creepy as fuck to boot, so it was instant approval from me. the hurgling is both unsettling and mysterious. love the sun hat. is he vaping? is his soul slowly escaping out of his mouth?? obviously loaded, which would be a plus if he planned on sharing any of it, but he’ll beat your ass if you ask. 9/10, a point for each finger he uses to hold his paddle. seriously, go look closer.

CHAOS: not much for conversation, which i understand and respect. love the unsettling voice work. i love how you think “yeah, they basically look like everyone else” at first glance, but if you look lower than their chest you become filled with cosmic dread. i’m not allowed to have too much of an opinion because i rarely accept their boons after tartarus, but i do think they’re dope as fuck. 7/10, love the amalgamation of faces that comprise 75% of their body as a design choice, but it also makes me real nauseous.

MEGAERA: “mark me down as scared and horny!” ...say 100% of the posts i’ve seen about her. (we get it. you’re into BDSM.) still, i won’t try to deny that she’s cool as hell. the high ponytail, the bright lipstick, the spike earrings and studded pauldrons... high fashion. she will gossip about you to her bff, who is a floating head, which makes me think she’s fun off the job as long as you’re not zagreus. i thought she was excessively cold at first, but she kind of just hates her job, her family, and her dumbass ex-boyfriend, so i started to feel for her. i’m depressed, too, girl. 8/10, please be nicer to me.

ALECTO: completely unhinged. wants to hurt you, but not in a way that’s fun for you. she scares me and makes me uncomfortable. 3/10, and 2 of the points are for the alarmingly suggestive line she prompted from zagreus the last time i fought her.

TISIPHONE: also scary, but at least she doesn’t spout on about how she wants to see your pretty blood. if i had to torture murderers for eternity i’d probably be like her, too, to be fair. i actually love how ghastly she is in comparison to her sisters. i think she and charon should be best friends because they both have scary faces and make weird groaning noises. would benefit from therapy. 7/10, how can i get that much volume in my hair?

THANATOS: heartbroken emo dude. his edginess is off the fucking charts. when i was a teenager, i would’ve lost my goddamn mind over this guy. the god of death, but it’s just his job - he takes it seriously but isn’t creepily passionate about it, which is quite the refreshing change from other depictions of gods of death. the eyeballs on his weapons are dope as fuck, but the skull on his belt looks like that tom the cat meme. i’m gay so you know i’m all about the pining and he’s got pining in spades. got some abandonment issues, don’t you, bud? it’s okay. it’s all gonna be okay. 9/10, want to give him juice and tell him zag will come around.

HYPNOS: i love him. i genuinely love him. he’s an obnoxious shit starter, he’s snarky, he’s lazy, he’s completely unhelpful, but he’s goddamn hilarious about it and i’m weak for brats with shitty personalities. i wish my hair was that fluffy. why does your sleep mask have eyes on it? you’re not fooling anybody. i choose to believe that his quilt-cape is a weighted blanket and that when you enter the house and hypnos is nowhere to be found, it’s because the blanket fell off and he floated off somewhere in his sleep. 10/10, would invite him to a party just to see which of my friends throws the first punch.

#you can tell i started it forever ago bc it would’ve still been ~relevant~ in october #hades blogging #hades game

[shemetan]

rapper hc part 1

hi guys!!! so i’ve had this idea in my head forever and just didn’t have anyone to share it with but i told hedy about it yesterday and she scammed me into creating tumblr acc and sharing it here lol but when i went to write it down i  realized that i have a lot more to share so it’s gonna be just the 1st part for now, which was the only thing i had in my mind originally but now i’m working on expanding it.

i have a lot of ideas from the songs and this is no exception. this time the inspiration was NF - an amazing rapper and song writer. his songs uncover so much trauma and the things he raps and sings about are so real for a lot of us that you can’t help relating to them. NF’s real name is Nathan which also played part in this idea. lyrics of the songs are what the hc is based on so please listen to the songs i mention and pay attention to the lyrics.

ok i don’t wanna waste more of your time bc the hc is big as it is so without further ado let’s dive into it. p.s. it’s the first time i do a thing like that so im sorry in advance for any inconsistencies or the general drama:)))

TW!! (everything is just mentioned, nothing too graphic) physical abuse, verbal/emotional abuse, alcohol, drinking, drug addiction, overdose, death from overdose, kidnapping, torture (beating, skin burning, cuts – all of it not descriptive), violence, breaking one’s own bones, putting bastards to prison. also NF’s lyrics got a lot of triggers and cover very serious issues so if you decide to listen to some more of his music be careful with that. some of the things mentioned in the songs i’ve used here: depression, grave digging, guns, blood (in a non-violent way).

neil’s story: he grew up in an abusive family. his father was drinking a lot and abused him physically and verbally saying that he was nothing and nobody and would not amount to anything in his life. he despised neil’s love for music and laughed at him. he also hit him more when he noticed anything related to neil’s passion (neil humming some melody or listening to music in his headphones or trying to create smth). his mother tried to protect him but she couldn’t do much bc of her drug addiction. she overdosed during his last year in hs and surprisingly left him some money. when Nathan found out about that he was enraged and beat the shit out of neil so he would give him that money. to run away from his father neil goes to university to study his passion – music. he’s always had some kind of knack for creating music and rapping and now he could explore it more and not be afraid of nathan. he tries to overcome his trauma and even makes some friends (the foxes).

during the freshman year andrew and neil spend a lot of time together. they find the reflections of their hurt in each other and they find understanding. they share some of their past and their traumas; their view of the world and their dreams. andrew feels like he is falling because he’s never met anyone like neil. slowly there are soft touches and furtive glances but neither is ready yet to cross that line.

neil seemingly gets better even though there are a lot of hard moments on the way. however at the end of his freshman year nathan finds him and he and his cronies kidnap and beat neil up for Mary’s money keeping him in the basement for several days. this money is all neil’s got to survive and build his life so he doesn’t say anything and thinks of the ways to run. im not good with making up torture techniques and nathan is not so imaginative here but they still leave neil with scars on his face, his torso and hands (mostly burns from cigarettes, iron, cuts from glass bottles). by the end of the third day neil is physically and morally exhausted so he gives up and transfers all the money to them (he’s got a little of it left on his other acc) and they drunk on their win leave him in the basement. he breaks his fingers to get out of the handcuffs and gets out through the small basement window and runs outside. not long after that he collapses from all the exhaustion and blood loss and someone notices him. they call the cops and the ambulance. after that nathan and his cronies are put into prison and neil is left with almost no money. he leaves the state and a year later with a lot of effort, practicing and self-advertising he successfully signs with a music label under the name N/A.

andrew’s story: tilda didn’t give him up but was a shitty mother (obv) with drug addiction. andrew and aaron’s parents were divorced and their father didn’t live with them but tried to be there when he could. andrew started creating music as an outlet bc tilda’s boyfriends were physically abusing him and he tried to protect aaron from that. he and aaron were close bc they only had each other but andrew still didn’t share his trauma with aaron trying to protect him from that hell. of course he was only a child and couldn’t always take aaron’s place in beating but most of it lay on him. while at hs they became a band with the help of nicky and performed with their songs were they could and tried to self-advertise and wymack (he’s the head of the music dep at uni and also one of the profs) noticed them and offered them partial scholarships. they had some money left after tilda’s overdose (they lived for some time with their father after her death) so they went to get actual education on music production (at this point I don’t care how plausible it sounds, just don’t think too much about it ok lol)

the story:

ok so nathaniel once went to uni with the foxes (is there such a major as music production and singing or smth?) but at the end of his freshman year he disappeared. he was not very sociable so no one really cared where’d he go except for the foxes with whom he became somewhat friends. 1-2 years later he pops up as a new young and very talented rapper named N/A and he’s got burn scars all over his face and hands which he doesn’t hide so very intriguing right??? nobody knows much about him and that his name stands for Neil Abram so they take it literally as ‘no data available’ or smth (hedy also proposed “not applicable”!). foxes are like WTF we know that guy!! and wymack is also like isn’t that nathaniel??

Andrew’s become a huge fan of neil’s music. only renee knows that andrew’s been listening to neil’s songs non stop bc he can relate so hard to them and they just hit him right where it hurts. at the end of their last year they have like a huge final concert or smth and wymack organizes it to be held in one of the palmetto clubs. at the same time neil is coming back to Palmetto bc he is nostalgic of the time he spent in the uni with the foxes and he wants to escape his real life for a moment. he wants to visit the city and reminisce and he believes that none of the foxes really remembers him bc he was a nobody. I know the plot is getting ridiculous but bear with me

so it’s the evening of the gig and the students perform their music (songs, instrumentals, as solos/duets/bands etc). andrew majorly produces rap songs at this point and he performs in duet with renee with their song (NF’s “Can you hold me”). everyone is like shit it was so good but then andrew performs his solo song (NF’s “How could you leave us”). aaron is standing there and is a fucking mess bc he never knew andrew was that affected by their past and their mother’s death bc he never showed it and didn’t ever want to talk about his issues. (be warned this is a heart-wrenching song and it fits fucking perfectly). after that andrew almost runs outside for a smoke, trying to light a cigarette with his shaking fingers and thats when he sees a strange all covered up figure in a black hoodie entering the club but also cautiously looking over their shoulder like they don’t want to be caught. andrew ever the protective one follows him but loses in the crowd of the low lit club. 10 mins later there is quiet and the figure goes on stage – obv its neil. “Intro III” starts playing.

andrew is in awe and he’s never heard this song before so it must be new. he also never saw neil perform live so he cant really move bc the performance is so powerful and magnetic. *neils sitting on one of the disconnected amplifiers in the dark and the music starts building up. At 2:00 of the song after the words “I mean, what are you, outta your mind? 'Cause both of us will be, come on, let's go outside!” he pulls off his hood, his movements are fierce and aggressive and he’s almost screaming in the mic. at words “You had me scared for a second, I thought we were diggin' my grave” theres his fathers smile, vicious, crazy and cruel – thats how he remembered it spending 3 days in that basement. (fyi in the song NF’s talking to his fear and they go back and forth).* 

andrew is mesmerized, the foxes are in shock, the whole crowd does not understand who that is but they watch with open mouths. the song ends and the crowd goes wild. that’s when neil starts talking.

“hello palmetto. this is a great concert you got and some of you guys are fucking talented. my name is neil and I used to go to PSU a long time ago so you prolly don’t know me but professor wymack out there let me come here on this stage and sing a couple of my songs for you. one of them is my old song, and another is new but they both tell my story and I hope you like’em”. 

people cheer and applaud and after a moment another song starts playing. its the one andrew knows (it’s Paralyzed). the atmosphere gets way calmer but everyone is just as hypnotized. during the chorus neil is standing under the dim lights, head turned up facing the ceiling, eyes closed, his scars are illuminated. he looks almost peaceful but there’s pain and apathy showing on his face and in his posture. the song ends and neil leaves the stage. andrew cant make his legs move but he has to meet neil (he just realized that neil’s shared his name with them and it wasn’t “nathaniel” and andrew’s got so many questions).

he forces himself to move and almost runs backstage. neil is already leaving but andrew stops him by grabbing him by his arm. they stand there looking at each other, andrew panting, his body shaking a little, neil wide-eyed.

“Andrew…” he whispers obviously surprised by seeing Andrew here.

“Nath- Neil.” suddenly Andrew cant ask a single question. he’s got so many that it feels like a waste of time to ask them one by one. Neil looks down at where Andrew is still grabbing his arm and Andrew lets go off him like its burnt him. “You are here” he lets out on the exhale like he still can’t believe it.

Neil averts his eyes and puts the hood of his sweater on his head so that the shadows obscure half of his face. “Yeah” he replies and after a few seconds follows with hesitant “How are you?” It is a stupid question, Andrew thinks but he answers nonetheless with simple fine. Neil holds his head low, and Andrew can’t help but wonder if Neil doesn’t wanna look him in the eyes after his disappearance so many years ago or if he simply doesn’t want to see Andrew’s face. Both options hurt him but he doesn’t have the heart to ask.

the end of part 1. come yell at me on twt or here hihi

#aftg #aftg headcanon #NF #akathemusicgod #rapper!neil #rapper!andrew #hcs #rapper au #rapper hc #andreil

[elviravampira]

Tw/Cw for parental abuse, self harm, parasites

.

.

.

I started cutting myself when I was thirteen, on my shoulders, and then my upper arm, and then my thighs. My mom saw healing cuts on my thighs one day when I was, if I had to guess, 16. She took me aside, pointed at my legs, and told me if I didn't cut that shit out she'd tell my dad. That threat rocked me to my core, and I just started cutting higher up. I didn't know what my dad would do or would have done if he did find out about my SH. But ma didn't find any more, and so, the question remains.

But...why? Why??? Why didn't she help me??? She never helped me. She was supposed to because she's my mom but she didn't, she made it worse and fucking slammed the metaphorical door in my face.

I had tried so many times to talk about my emotions to my parents. Hey, I feel incredibly angry all the time and daydreams of violence make me feel calm. Hey, I'm really sad all the time and I don't know why but I am also losing interest in everything and can't focus, is that normal? Hey mom and dad, I feel like I'm being watched all the time. I feel like that's voices in my head do nothing but tell me what a Stupid Piece of Shit I am.

Everything was met with "this is normal parts of growing up! 😊 Everyone feels like that!" Now I understand that my parents are most likely mentally ill as well, and since I know that both of them think therapy is for "weak" people, they're undiagnosed. Remember, it's only a real illness if you are bleeding. Remember, don't forget.

Obviously that's horseshit. It did not help me and made it worse. I'm just too much of a wimp I guess. I began disaccociating when I was 14 and told no one because...I mean? When had they listened to me before? Even with physical illnesses I got fucking shit for. As I'm typing this, I'm remembering being like 9. I had pinworms. I used to play in the dirt a lot, I guess, so that's where they came from. I had them for a while before I realized what they were, and had to work up the nerve to tell my mom I thought I might have a parasite. She didn't look up from her book when she asked "are you fucking kidding me?"

I don't remember all that I said of course, about yeah I'm sure, I saw them in the toilet, but I felt she was angry at me, and didn't bring it up again. She didn't take me to the doctor. She didn't ever ask me about it. The worms went away on their own.

Haha, man. That brought up a bunch of memories of physical injuries I was yelled at over or not believed for.

My mom is the chief rug sweeper in the family. "I like to keep the peace", she says, as she lets my dad's Nmother verbally harass her and her children. This is a trait I learned from her, and it has hindered me incredibly. I'm doing my best to unlearn this and hold people accountable, including myself.

The fundamental betrayal of both of my parents against me, their daughter, is bad, and in some ways the turning away of my mother is worse than the eggshells my father forced me to walk on.

But that's a different post with different tags, and something that will be painful to write.

I'm glad I started this blog. Getting these memories out of my head, placing them here where I and they are safe. A lot of my childhood is now coming back into my memory since I'm out of that environment for good, and my head is uncomfortably crowded and it's loud. My boyfriend is amazing and incredibly supportive and understanding; however, he isn't my dumping ground for my baggage. He doesn't mind listening and comforting me, but it's unreasonable to talk about this with him whenever it's bothering me--which, now, is a lot. I told him and only him about this blog, and he thinks it's a great idea. I love him so much. Maybe I'll make a post one day just gushing about him instead of dragging my parents.

I wonder how I'll feel about this blog after they're gone. Maybe I'll feel guilty and bad and gaslight myself. But...it fucking happened. They did this and it was abuse. I won't say they're shitty people, because I can't. Ugh. Why is this shit so complicated, lol.

When I started this blog I thought I'd go with a linear timeline of my childhood, but I see now that that's impossible for me to do. So many of my memories are jumbled and missing pieces. But that's okay. It's okay.

Fuck.

--Elvira Vampira

#Abuse #parentalabuse #mental health #vent #tw abuse #cw abuse #twabuse #cwabuse #parental abuse #tw self harm #cw self harm #cw parasites #tw parasites #narcissism #rug sweeping #this is not okay

[eyeslikefoxglove]

Episode 21 - The PTSD is strong with this one & we need more braincells

Hello hello! Welcome to the commentary. How’s everyone? I’m frozen solid because it’s mid-June in Spain and yet we had 11°C yesterday. Fucking awesome!

I AM NOT WEARING MASCARA SO I CAN CRY ALL I WANT. I DONT KNOW IF THATS GOOD OR BAD THO.

Can I just take a second to appreciate how much this big strong powerful men emote? I mean, I know this isn’t western media where the tough guy can’t show emotions, and I don’t know that eastern media has the same hangups about men emoting but just... it’s so refreshing.

Huaisang bb you’re so sweet.

Oh, oh the PTSD is strong with this one.

Also, bless both JC and NHS, they absolutely noticed WWX flinch and, in their own ways, went and steamrolled over it so WWX wouldn’t feel scrutinised.

WE INTERRUPT THIS BROADCAST TO INFORM YALL THAT I GOT A KITTEN ON MY LAP. (She’s kneading my boob, which, ow, but...)

*BICHEN GRIIIIIIIP*

How do y’all think the guards go deliver bad news to WRH? Like do they paper-rock-scissor it? Draw straws?

NMJ did you have to?

And once again I wonder what would’ve happened if JFM had let sect leader Yao kick it.

Ughvhfnevus it’s this clown. Same as with Su She, if you see a bunch of screaming it’s just me not wanting to listen to Jin ZiXun.

The Nies: let’s throw a banquet to honour WWX’s return

Every asshole there: *gossips about WWX while in the room with him*

Once again I wish I could transmigrate (and speak mandarin lol) and just start delivering tongue lashings.

Listen, I have no idea how to play Guqin, but I did play the guitar for years and even from here I can see how much YiBo’s hands don’t match the melody. Nothing against him but why does this always happen? I know they got classes, so was the music not written by that time or something? Because one thing is not hitting the correct notes, another is plucking slow notes when the tempo is much faster.

JC: Since yours and LWJ’s unhappy separation...

My dumbass: do you mean breakup? *eyebrow waggle*

You will pry my “JC knows his brother is pinning after LWJ, he probably doesn’t want to know anything else” hc out of my cold dead hands thankyouverymuch.

WWX: *spouts a bunch of misdirection to avoid giving JC a straight answer*

JC: Bull-fucking-shit.

Should I count how many times WWX PTSDs all over the place or would you like me to leave your hearts intact? That’s two so far.

Ok ok, I feel that, if someone with a bit less trauma and a bit of insight (NHS maybe?) had seen the bit where ChenQing fucking hurts Shijie thing would’ve gone differently. I mean, yes, LWJ keeps warning WWX that this shit is gonna fuck him up, but as I said in my previous commentary LWJ also has the communication skills of a hermit crab so that wouldn’t work, and JC would be too wound up and WWX too busy trying to conceal his lack of golden core for that conversation to go anywhere. But if someone who WWX knows is a good egg (I’m not gonna say trusts bc paranoia) had sat him down and told him “your new instrument that you use for your new form of cultivation just hurt the person you love most please be careful when you use it.” I think it would’ve worked wonders towards his health overall.

I know Shijie says it’s like Zidian, but she’s not working with the fact that this thing is made for and by the Dark Side of the Force and I’m sorry but I can’t help but see ChenQing as a bit of a horrocrux almost. Or like, if you like me think the Burial Mounds is an Entity, something that’s a bit more sentient that it lets on.

Speaking of reputations and NHS being a good egg, I have oh-so-many ideas (I won’t say plot bunnies because I can’t write for shit) in which NHS for Reasons (time-travel? Letter from the future? His massive brain?) realises just how much damage WWX is doing to his public image. And he might be a sheltered dandy, but he saw what being the son of a sex worker did to Meng Yao despite how hard he worked (I’m assuming he doesn’t know about the whole betrayal business). This is way fucking worse, like hell is he going to let one of his best friends paint a target on his back. So he pulls back his sleeves, engages his slytherin brain and proceeds to lay down a plan to throughly destroy WWX’s reputation as a powerful genius.

I’m guessing LWJ and JC protest, and maybe WWX, and NHS just hits them with “do you want him respected or alive?” And they shut tf up. He glues himself to WWX, and brings up as many instances in which their behaviour can be compared as he can (we got drunk and punished at cloud recesses, we slept in class, we skipped to go fishing, I don’t carry my sword either). And, because assholes be assholes, people like Sect Leader Yao or Clown Cousin are quick to start spouting their own derogatory bullshit and thus WWX the untamed powerful prodigy dies a fiery death. Now he’s just a mouthy kid with a quick mind that “does tricks instead of battle” (I’ll never get bored of using that Thor quote). I also like to think that people who personally know WWX and are not pieces of shit go give NHS a tongue lashing for messing with what they thought was his friend, NHS takes that as a test of good eggness and bring them into the plan. Soon the whole Cloud Recesses class is swearing up, down, left, right and centre that all the shit WWX has ever successfully pulled is just an insane amount of luck and quick thinking.

I don’t know how would they work him into the battlefield (disguise? Mask?) to unleash his demonic cultivation but that’s Plot and I don’t do that.

Also, because I’m a terrible human being I want to say that people assume LWJ is on “pretty but useless” WWX like white on rice because *insert derogatory comment about being good in bed and sexual favours*. Because y’all know the assholes here are Like That. And WWX is horrified because holy fucking shit he’s gonna drag LWJ’s reputation down, he can’t have people thinking HGJ is ok with having him as a concubine pretty much. But before he can act LWJ politely all but confirms that yeah, he’s tapping that, y’all wish you were but he doesn’t share and none of y’all are good enough for his Wei Ying anyway. CUE FAKE/PRETEND RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE I AM INDEED TRASH FOR THAT TROPE.

Muahahahaha y’all thought I was gonna devolve into my personal hcs and not include my fave trope? Shouldn’t y’all know me better by now?

(Btw I like this bit ^ so I might polish it a little and post it separately as well, just a warning if you find yourself reading an eerily similar post by me)

WuJi is playing and LWJ is pining so much. Also, if LWJ did not just realise that, just like Yu the Great, WWX had no other option but tame resentful energy I’ll eat my blanket.

I refuse to believe Jiang Yanli didn’t become the unofficial war camp therapist/sounding board/only sane person/everyone’s mum/I just need a hug and a corner to cry in peace. There are not enough fics about Shijie being her gentle BAMF self while in the camp and it’s a pity. My crops are dying y’all!

Also, I will fight anyone who scoffs at Shijie being the epitome of the “gentle woman who cooks and waits for the men to come back from war”. Look at her mum, do you think it is easy for a kid (she was a kid in the flashback when WWX ran away) to see that day in and day out, to have that as a “role model” and decide that she was not going to be like her mum? That she didn’t like what she saw in her so she was going to be kind and gentle? And do you think it is easy for a person barely in their twenties to deal with years of verbal and psychological abuse for again, being gentle and kind, and not grow a hard shell of bitterness to protect themselves? And to keep being gentle and kind while at war, with your parents dead and your siblings unraveling before your very eyes? Shijie is so fucking strong and I love her.

Hey look, the White Walkers!

“Resentful energy is just energy” ok, valid. But my dude, you’ve got black ghost smoke coming out of you and can hear people screaming in your head. I’m not saying it is evil, like someone’s uptight set in his ways arrogant uncle; but it sure as shit ain’t healthy.

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH (that’s a Clown Cousin scream btw)

Ok ok, just one little thing: IF SOMEONE ELSE CALLS WWX WEI YING AS A SHOW OF DISRESPECT IMMA SCALP THEM.

...are those crows eating that man alive? Yikes on bikes.

(Assume my comment about YiBo’s Guqin playing also goes for Xiao Zhan and his flute. I can’t play the flute but the tempo doesn’t match his fingers)

I’m just gonna say it, I think 3zun (well, 2zun as of now) suspect shit went down badly for WWX, that’s two questions by both of them in a very soft conciliatory tone. They are genuinely interested/worried about the topic, and don’t seem to come off as chiding or judgemental. I mean WWX is a weirdo irreverent kid and they’re sect leaders, they outrank him so much it’s ridiculous. I’m also counting the fact that both their baby brothers like him towards them being so kind. But I also think WWX just triggers all their big brother instincts the second he walks in.

Oh there’s a thought, Shijie, Wen Qing, NMJ and LXC take a look at everyone’s shitty parents and just decide to adopt everyone.

What happened at Yiling was a traumatised teenager (is WWX even 20?) PTSDing all over the place with the Dark Side of the Force whispering in his ear and an all powerful trinket at his disposal. Not saying I approve of all the torture and murder but he clearly isn’t revelling in them.

That is some outstanding bit of big-brothering on LXC’s side and I love it. Also, my dumbass just realised LWJ probably wasn’t quoting WWX when he was being punished (what is white what is black?) I think he was quoting his big brother. Which is magnitudes deep too, but in a different direction and I might love that scene even more.

Ok fuck it, I’m gonna tangent. So I had a terrible boyfriend when I was 15-18. He alienated me from my friends, sunk my self-esteem to the molten core of the earth, tried to convince me my parents were abusive and encouraged (aka threatened manipulated and cajoled) the slow tanking of my high school marks. I have A Problem when I see media where someone latches onto their significant other and everything they are shifts towards that person. Now, love, true genuine love, is powerful, and I believe it can be the catalyst for shifting your world-view for the better. I don’t have a problem with that. I don’t have a problem with people sticking with their romantic partner if it is clear their previous “family” is so much shit. I don’t have a problem with LWJ coming out of his shell and defying corrupt precepts because his love for WWX made them see they were wrong, or getting sassy and unrepentant during his punishment (I have a problem with the punishment bc that’s abuse but...). But I do side-eye WangXian being the only thing in their orbit. People need people, and WangXian have other good people around them. So I kind of love that yes, WWX showed him the system was corrupt, but it is the words of his brother he is sticking by to the defy said system.

Let’s go back to our scheduled slew of held pinning glances shall we?

LXC after That awkward run-in: WangJi I wasn’t gone that long, what the fuck did you two oblivious pining idiots do?

(LXC has “bitching” tea sessions with Shijie and you can’t convince me otherwise)

LWJ: *is being dramatic and not knocking on WWX’s door*

Me: oh my god you fucking idiot

Shijie: *walks in*

Me: oh thank god someone with a braincell.

Ah yes, there we go triggering WWX’s paranoia again. Why would he get a break.

OH MY GOD YOU PAIR OF FUCKING IDIOTS. THATS IT, FUCK THIS SHIT IM OUT.

@ LWJ: bitch wtf was that? I know you’re shit at talking but have you thought about writing it down? Letters anyone? It worked for mr. Darcy.

(Yes LWJ is mr darcy and now I want an au where LWJ writes WWX letters and just pours everything in them, WWX finds them, any everything is sunshine and rainbows)

While this bullshit fight/misunderstanding is all on LWJ’s shoulders, I’m also going to scream at WWX. Because yes, he is in PTSD hell, but he trusted LWJ before, and yet he can’t get past his perceived notion of LWJ’s character (and his own inadequacies) to trust him again and ask for help. Plus, you know, he thinks he doesn’t deserve he’ll bc *waves hand at WWX’s trauma conga line*

These episodes can’t be good for my BP.

Thanks for reading!

#the untamed #cql #mdzs live action #mdzs #foxglove watches cql #foxglove watches the untamed #lan wangji #wei wuxian #wangxian #jiang yanli #jiang cheng #yunmeng trio #yunmeng siblings #commentary

[brownskngirl]

rambling.

Everyday I wake up and are beyond thankful and blessed to wake next to the one person that i love the most. He helps me build myself and life together. We have a beautiful puppy named Mamba. Definitely trying for a baby as well. I don't know sometimes I do have these feelings as though ill never been good enough for anyone. Sure; yeah, my photos get likes and there are plenty of people that I could hangout with and/or call friends, I just truly know that no one is going to have your back like you do. for the first seven years of my life and even after, I belonged to everyone. my dad just tossed me around homes with his friends and or co-workers as well as different family members. I got to experience the wonderful life of neglect, child abuse, and sexual molestation. My dad left me, my biological dad left me, my mother left, I wasn't able to meet my biological father until I was about 20-21. Our relationship at that is rocky. the parents that raised me disowned me due to them being extremely controlling. Everyone leaves. Or they choose to spend there time entertaining other people. Like I don't know my aunt and uncle that raised me always were so about one another. My uncle would like barely even look at anyone else, she sure as hell didn't. their bond and built family wasn't perfect by all means but they did it together and I guess that's all I've really wanted and searched for in life. Well in the male wise. I'm not sure why I let myself be abused to the point where I couldn't breathe. I let a man dictate how I felt about myself to the point I starved myself almost two years straight, had my weight weekly checked , psychiatric appointments weekly, did coke for the first time, drank every day, every chance I got. It was kind of bad for a good three years but whatever. Sometimes my boyfriend entertains females. for what reason I'm not sure. like why slide up on her story with no face but her body and alcohol? why want her to send her address when she's drinking? I wasn't invited so its not like we both were going to go. I try so hard every time to just trust. trust. trust. trust. believe every word he says about us forever and us together. I'm not that public of a person but I let it be known who I'm dating and that I'm in a relationship. yet he don't, wow he allows it on Facebook, meanwhile talking about other girls squirting on him. lmao. every argument we have had I've done nothing but my absolute best to be and do better for myself, him, and our future. I just want him to have everything he ever wanted and hoped and dreamt of. If I could give him all the money cars and love in this world I would. he deserves it, he deserves the world and more. I wanna be by his side being his number one fan and girl and supporter through it all. I wanna show him that I'm not ever going to give up on him, no matter how hard times get, how low life seems, and even through the daily life adventures. this is my person. and when we have deep talks i really believe him to the point where I am crying because he understands me and hears me and I love that. but then the next day the smallest tiniest thing will set him off and I'm stupid. I'm really hurt still about all of the stuff he told me when he left me at the casino. he gone flex on me with a hotter bitch, I ain't shit, I'm a dumb bitch. Like whaaaaaa. I love you with every ounce in my entire soul and would drop absolutely anyone and anything for you. as I have and will forever to continue to do. but when is enough, enough?? when am i enough for him to be like nah I got a girl lol. or be like not unless my girl sliding. love the support though, keep sharing. its not its send the address no cap. hahahahhaa. I'm embarrassed to have them on my snap. like yeah I show him off cause like haaa I have him but then I look fucking stupid cause they over there being the first to watch my story and probably just be laughing at me. I LOOK FUCKING STUPID. then again its whatever. I try to understand that when we got together it was right after he got out. and he missed all his outside life from

being sent away. :/// its just how can I be more of a woman that he's proud to be with, wants to be with. someone whos like nah my bitch is badder. lmao instead I'm just over here hoping he even likes me today. I just need to I don't know yet figure out how I can continue to grow as a woman and wife. I wish we didn't lose our baby though. I often think about it. I was farther than I thought, and I wish that right now I was talking to my baby and watching him/her grow in my belly. because its parents would love that baby more than anything on planet earth. I pray we get pregnant though, but when we are ready. I love my man so fucking much and I really know how much he tries to do good in this world and how far he has come as a person. he really is so amazing, so smart, handsome and beyond giving. even to people who definitely don't deserve it. I don't know how I was so blessed and lucky to have him with me. I really am, I love his family too, so much. I hope he never leaves me. id do anything for him and he knows that. I just also pray and hope that I am enough as a person for him to remain loyal faithful well only entertaining all that to me and only me. he is my other half, forever.

my family always taught me that crying wasn't okay. therefore I never really cried growing up. I mean yeah when I got hurt and such but even when I almost broke my nose I didn't cry. It just wasn't something I was allowed to do. everything I felt, every feeling, every moments, etc. I was alone. I really went through life alone. Part of it was my fault yeah I could have opened more up to my aunt a little more and did more with her, but she wasn't that person for me.

Real question is why? why do people willingly choose to hurt others. What am I doing wring in life to have all these people want to leave me and then actually leave. but its more than that people like to see me hurt. for what? maybe I'm too sensitive now and need to back to being an anger bitch. but I fight everyday to be a better person. a happier person. there's just times like I know I'm going to fuck up and I just don't like disappointing people and that is all I seem to be good at. my legal dad is just neglectful and wants to throw my biological father in my mothers face. as if I was at an age to say whether or not who could raise me. At the end they all did a shitty job. It's just crazy how everyone can have an opinion on the way I need to be living my life. I'm always too much this or too much that. I have an angry face and i know that, I know that i always look like that i am angry or that i am upset about something but reality is that im not, i dont really get mad easily. it takes a lot. I just overthink about everything. Like one thing will happen then ill instantly think about the time that it happened before or if it had even happened before, yeah know. i dont know anymore im just rambling and complaining about nothing. i guess typing all of this out feels better than talking to my asshole of a dog or too busy boyfriend.

#venting again

[drunklander]

Drunj!Der Yells About Outlander

Thoughts on Ep. 506

STAY AT HOOOOOOOME!!!!!

Ok, now that that’s out of the way... I kind of liked this episode. Which surprised me. Because usually I find myself neutral at best. But, considering how much I’ve hated disliked the last few seasons, I guess that feeling mostly neutral means this season has been better? The bar is low, y’all.

Could 1000% still use more Claire though. And more Jamie and Claire. And yes I know I’m saying that in the recap for an episode where the two of them bang.

I said what I said.

The title card’s powder blocker thingy looks like a plague doctor mask. We should bring those back. I found a box that had a bunch of them in it in the closet at my office once. That was weird. Also, stay the fuck at home and 6′ away from people if you have to go out on a supply run or take a walk.

Ooo, a flashback! I miss Scotland.

“Whom do I address, sir?” “I am Samuel Torrington,” said the guy who is most def *not* Samuel Torrington.

I know I shouldn’t laugh because of what’s about to happen, but looool at the girl for stepping in the literal one spot of mud.

Well that was dumb. Why the fuck would you run in between your dad and the guy he’s clearly gonna shoot?

I mean, it’s super sad, I guess. But also hella dumb.

Ah, a lavender pillow. Yes, I know it’s from the book. But between this and the BJR stuff, it’s like, do they know other smells exist?

But yeah, guess I shouldn’t talk since I have lavender hand soap, lavender lotion, lavender tea and a lavender candle.

It’s the best smell.

Ok, I get why Murcasta can’t be endgame. That was a good decision. But including Innes BeCaUsE tHe BoOk is dumb af. They got to the right decision to break up Murcasta, but for the wrong fucking reason.

Like, seriously though, can we please take a moment to appreciate how dumb this is? Like, book!Innes is from Ardsmuir. He’s been part of the squad. He’s basically one of Jamie’s most trusted friends. And he marries Jocasta. Show!Innes is literally some dude we’ve never heard of until last week because the fucking writers were like oh, Jocasta has to marry someone named Duncan Innes. Guess we should make that happen, out of the blue, for no other reason. Lazy idiots...

Jocasta has better handwriting than I do and I can fucking see what I’m doing.

Also lol at her straight up ignoring Roger saying that Jemmy won’t take her money.

Cut to Jemmy crying about the fact that he is now a participant in chattel slavery. I feel you, Jem.

Oh, it’s a cold? Ok fine, but also the whole chattel slavery thing.

ADSOOOOO! Such a good lil floofer! Look how nice he is, bringing them that excellent bug! WHO’S A GOOD KITTY? YOUUU ARE!

I really like Claire’s necklace. Also Claire’s neck. Also Claire’s collarbones. Also Claire. Can we have more Claire please? And less manpain in general?

D’awww, Lord John Grey the awkward gay. GIVE HIM AN APPROPRIATE BOYFRIEND ALREADY, YOU COWARDS.

Tryon is such a fucking douche. So is Quincy Arbuckle.

Well, it might not prevent tumultuous and riotous assembly, but not hanging out in groups larger than 10 sounds like a greAT FUCKING IDEA RIGHT NOW.

STAY AT HOOOOOOOOOOOOME. (If you are able to, and if you have to go to work, WASH YOUR HAAAAAAAAAAAANDS.)

Fergus, Marsali and Bree standing around this room being disappointed with Roger is A Mood™.

Team Give Fergus and Marsali More to Do

Oh, you’ve never been comfortable in your big fancy mansion? Poor you. *plays the world’s smallest violin*

News spreads slowly in/from the backcountry except, apparently, Claire’s medical advice.

Claire Fraser said reproductive rights!!! *ups monthly donation to Planned Parenthood*

The casting for Wylie is fucking perfect. Like kudos to the casting folks again.

I cared more about the Regulator shit in the show than the book because Murtz, but all the “Oh it’s happening! JK, it’s not! JK, it is!” that they took from the book is making me care less about it. Just happen already or fuck off.

Yes, I know it’s gonna happen next week.

Roger shoveling shit makes me happy. Because it’s gross and I do not like Roger.

“You keep shoveling your shit.” -- The Fandom Bree

Wylie should be a caricature with how fucking terrible he is, but let’s be real. We've all run into a guy like that.

Oh, Claire’s rings.

I did some mental gymnastics years ago to try to wrap my brain around why Claire would still wear an emotionally abusive piece of shit’s Fred’s ring. And the fact that the books and the show are like nope, she just likes Fred, drives me up a fucking wall every time.

“He must have been quite the man to inspire such devotion after all these years.” “Nah, he was an asshole. A complete and utter piece of shit. And instead of going with that and all the complexities it brings, we continue to gaslight the audience that he was a Good Dude. Instead of using the ring as a symbol of something more than fucking Fred, we just keep on pretending he didn’t suck.”

I hate everyone involved with refusing to acknowledge how shitty Fred was.

There is literally only one smuggler in the Carolinas.

DO NOT GO WITH THE CREEPY MAN TO A SECOND LOCATION. CLAIRE, THIS IS BEING A WOMAN 101. NEVER GO WITH A CREEP TO A SECOND LOCATION.

“I get a biblical plague.” You get what you deserve, Rog.

Jamie, chill with the extra testosterone. Just punch the bro or something.

Also don’t fucking blame the victim, asshole.

Literalol at Bree showing the women her like stick and sheet fan thing and then cut to all the people with just little squares, barely doing anything.

“Don’t stop! Keep your fires going!” *everyone stops and just stares at the bugs*

Gonna go ahead and take this time to remind folks that’s it’s fucking gross to get married on a plantation. Don’t do that thing.

I know a guy who is like proud of the fact that he’s an asshole. He talks about it like it’s one of his defining traits. This scene with Wylie being like “buddy, I love my shitty reputation” reminds he of that guy. I cannot fucking stand that guy.

*ignores Claire’s feelings about Fred’s dumb ring and headcanons in my own reasons instead because I cannot even with this nonsense anymore*

Ah, the Lindsays like Roger now. I still do not like Roger.

I fucking love this whole Murcasta scene. Can we get one of these for Jamie and Claire? I miss them having big sweeping scenes that have time to breathe and unfold and all the good shit like Murcasta gets here.

The show keeps trying to deny it, but scenes like this are where it’s strongest. But it refuses to accept that this is its lane and keeps trying to go elsewhere.

I miss Jamie and Claire.

I miss the MacKenzies.

I wanna give Jocasta a hug. She’s still trash for enslaving people, though.

Maria Doyle Kennedy is a goddamn treasure. Seriously, her casting was the best choice the show made in years.

That and saving Murtz, of course.

So fucking glad they cut the creepy-ass foot thing.

Jamie, you’re drunk, but read the fucking room. Claire’s right. Just because she says shit from the future all the time doesn’t negate the fact that she’s right about you right now. Also, seriously? You’re taking *this* opportunity to call her out?

Buddy deserved that slap.

Look, I’m always down for the Frasers to fuck. More Fraser fucking, I say. But this is just another instance like their fight at Lallybroch where the fight itself is never actually resolved like it should be. They just fuck about it and magically everything is ok again. Le sigh.

Murcasta gets a big long scene with time to breathe and talk through everything and it’s riveting af. But Jamie and Claire never get that anymore and it pisses me off tbh.

Stop shoehorning in book lines! She can’t see shit through all the skirts and stuff!

I miss the Lallybroch ring. What did they ever end up doing with it? It’s floating around somewhere.

Bonnet is so evil to 11 about fucking everything that it makes him boring. We get it. You’re a bad guy. Do you also have a tiny dick or something that you’re overcompensating for?

Can we please wrap this Bonnet shit up this season? I swear if they drag it out as long as they do in the books I’m gonna be rull annoyed.

Ok so now the war is actually gonna for real happen and I’m like legit out of fucks to give about it because Murtz aside, they’ve done the “it’s coming, jk!” fake out too many times...

Can they try to hang Murtz instead? Because I swear spending half a season with emo!Roger is cruel and unusual punishment.

#* #outlander starz #outlander 5x06 #drunj!der yells about outlander