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#I’m not gonna say who it was unless they want me to
doomsday-dj · 2 days
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Yo. Bestie. Do you have any Rizzles author recommendations for me??
You have cruelly seduced me into this teeny-tiny-weeny fandom and now I have galloped my way through (almost) all of your brilliant body of work I am cast adrift and quickly finding out that "sort by kudos" simply does not bring up the goods here...
Help a gay out?
Oh fuck yeah, bestie. Yes. Do I ever!! I am about to WEAR OUT the link function. But before the recommendations: aw shucks and thank you and all that. Your comments this week have been a highlight. I'm sorry to have dragged you into this but hopefully this post makes up for it! I've been dabbling in some other fandoms lately, ones with a LOT of fics, and there's a lot of great writers out there, but I have to say that especially relative to how many fics there are, there's an outrageous amount of good writers who have written Rizzles.
Okay! So disclaimer that I’ve had a really ungodly amount of coffee today so if this is a little on the “un” side of hinged then I apologize. I am definitely gonna be REAL effusive. I was silly and shy about leaving comments and kudos when I first got on AO3 and now I make up for those crimes by being unabashedly keen.
I have gone and sorted by kudos (and, sidenote, discovered that I'm in the top 30????) and before I get to the under-appreciated bangers, I will say that plenty of my faves feature in the first two pages of sort by kudos (though their most kudosed work is almost never my fave one). Here I’m thinking of coolbyrne, @julieverne, DanteBeatrice77. All of these authors are awesome.
Also, amongst the highly kudosed works, Attachment by @performativezippers is a classic for in the fandom for good reason (and their Bachelor AU is a romp) and law of the lever by sharkfights is one of my favourites all time.
As for the other stuff, what do you WANT out of your fic, bestie?
You want the feelings? You want the beautifully written feelings? @ladyriot has got feelings FOR DAYS. If you want some one shots that will take you apart and put you back together, you’ve come to the right place. Good feelings, angsty feelings, all the feelings you need. My favourite is Let Our Hands Tell the Story but I recommend all of them. Mostly it's one shots but the one complete multi-chapter fic, Transference, is CRIMINALLY UNDERRATED. Less than 200 kudos?! Fuck all the way off. I don’t know if it’s because it’s an AU or if it’s because of the doctor/patient element but unless that’s a trigger, I promise you it it’s handled very artfully and also it’s fucking fiction and no patient’s rights were violated in the making of this fic. Oh and put your ink on my skin 'til it comes off on me is both devastating and stupid hot.
Haven’t had enough feelings?? Take your insufficiently battered heart over to @sideadde’s work. I especially like Who Needs Two Kidneys When Another Heart Can Be Had? and Immersion Therapy.
You want a big meaty casefic you can sink your teeth into?? Domini_porter’s CMYK is so goddamn good. The smutty chapters in this one are just...chef's kiss. Among my favourites all time. I am also entirely obsessed with their Victorian AU, which deserves more attention. Also if you want some crack-your-chest-open-and-pull-out-your-guts angst go alllll the way back to their first fics on AO3.
OH. @kurtsvonneslut too. I think and you cooled my mind that burned with longing is probably my favourite post-finale type fic, bit of an AU with some major canon changes. They also have an excellent picking-up-from-the-Jane-and-Maura-season-2/3-break-up casefic, A Crime of Passion, and they wrote a devastating exploration of PTSD that just...oooof.
God, I could really just keep going and going. And this is just on AO3!!! I feel like I could do a whole part two of this that's just flagging all the best stuff that's back on ff.net. I might have to because this is already really long. But I'm stopping for now. Thanks for the BEST ASK.
*dramatic stage whisper* psssst do you want smut? I feel like I could also do a whole post on smut alone. Maybe later.
Note: I’ve tagged authors if their tumblr name is the same as their ao3 name, because I assume they’re okay with being found. If any of you would like to be untagged from the post just DM me and I’ll do that lickety split.
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thehornyfemme · 1 year
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Session last night with a mutual
Last night I had a session with a mutual, they’re currently asleep, and I made the mistake of being mouthy and telling them that I had nipple and clit clamps. Oo when I tell you I cried I was sobbing.
They made me cockwarm my toy until they got home and then when they did I had to slowly thrust it into me. And when I say slowly I mean millimetre by millimetre. Then I was mouthy and o both regret and am so glad I did.
They made me take the toy out when I’m already sensitive and slap my hole 20 times. When I got ten I had to put the clamps on which by fuck hurt especially the one on my clit when I slapped it.
After 20 slaps I was allowed to fuck myself with the toy but I have tug the clamp chain each time the toy thrusted in. And each time I came I was allowed to go faster.
Let me just say they broke me very quickly and got me a putty mess very quickly after the clamps.
After I came they stayed and helped me to think what I needed to do in aftercare but let’s just say my nipples are still rock hard and sensitive and hurt.
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Genuinely don’t mean this as any sort of callout post but it’s interesting to me how there’s been a trend in newer (?) whump blogs putting really long disclaimers in their bios and pinned posts, saying that they don’t condone violence, that they aren’t responsible for other people’s actions, that they know it’s bad and it’s just fiction.
It’s honestly making me wonder how much purity culture has seeped into the fabric of even the Whump community, that people feel the need to explicitly state what I would have accepted as an easily presumed given. When did we get to a point where we have to preface any conversation by stating that we don’t condone irl violence, lest someone accuse us of immorality?
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aiizaph · 4 months
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I am about to make 2024 my villain arc if alloromantics don’t shut the fuck up right now.
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sashimiyas · 1 year
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#tw discourse#i’m gonna say an unpopular opinion once and then be on my way again#sometimes i see something on here that makes me upset and then i think#‘i really need to be on here less.’ but then i realize… i rarely use the app as it is#but writers love to say ‘we don’t get paid to write. we are not machines.’ all valid points#bc entitlement is frustrating. bc this is meant to be a community of natural engagement and interaction#i want to specify Natural#bc i see those same writers bash their followers for not like rbing or commenting#as if they are getting paid to follow the author! and that isn’t fair either#writers ask for grace when they are going through writers block or a difficult episode in their life#and our followers cannot ask for the same? sometimes we do not feel like reading. and let’s admit it. not every post will be a banger#and that should be fine too. no one should be guilted to interact with anyone#and i think my whole discomfort with using this site lately is how every interaction is being policed#like do we not assume good intentions anymore? can we not assume that someone is rbing without tags but will put something in later#when they do get a chance to read it? or that they are liking because they want to read it but just dont have the time yet?#anyways. i’ll probably come back to delete this#but man. anyone who follows me. i want you to know that i will do my best to never try and make you feel bad for choosing how to interact#with this blog. outside of not responding to my inbox bc that’s just been difficult for me lately.#please have a comfortable experience and go about this stupid little hellhole in peace#don’t feel coerced to interact with me unless you want to. don’t apologize to me for not having reached out to me in a while#it’s okay. please have your fun in any way you want#i say this bc before being a writer i am a reader
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starlooove · 6 months
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The reason recent canon batfam sucks is because they have plotlines that could be fun but utilize fanon interpretation btw. “They can’t even write tim” the tim you like DOESNT exist and has NEVER existed. He started existing and it fucked up so many pre existing INTERESTING dynamics and potential situations that it got boring as fuck. Same with literally everyone else
#characters like Damian getting the same storyline over and over is racism#but fanon Is a lot more racist than canon and I’ll say it with my chest#at least canon gave Damian friends and growth at least once#y’all are still hemming and hawing over that fucking dinosaur tim doesn’t even care about anymore#whenever anything interesting or complicated happens it’s ooc and ‘don’t writers know we want happy family dynamics 😕’#that anxiety thing Bruce did to Jason#sucks and all but far far more interesting than ANYTHING fanon has EVER come up with#canon is cool ideas done poorly and fanon is poor ideas done worse#and don’t get me wrong some fanon stuff is fun#like SUPER fun#but the idea that ‘fanon is better bc dc can’t write 🥺’#I’m never gonna defend DC writers as a whole but YALL CANT EITHER#copy pasting found family templates onto characters admitting you haven’t and never will read a comic and turning around to shit on shit#you have NEVER read#some of y’all still think dick wanted tim in Arkham or that Jason never killed unless necessary#like fuck y’all are so irritating#if fanon wasn’t so racist and even worse BORING that poll wouldn’t be so egregious like fuck#like the racism is everywhere but batfandom has deluded itself into believing it’s unique when it’s kooky but quiet dad Bruce immortal#Alfred silly big bro dick who has quiiiite the temper gaurd dog Jason who made some mistakes but regrets everything coffee addict tim who’s#only flaw is insecurity and not caring for himself enough quiet dragon lady cass who can be sassy waffle loving sillay Steph murderous#borderline evil Damian who’s life’s goal is to destroy tim and nervous new Duke.#and don’t forget Barbara Is computer girlboss#like it’s just so. bland. maybe DC doesn’t listen to you bc ur fucking stupid s
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iguessitsjustme · 2 years
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I mean, Prapai had to coerce Sky each time he wanted to get him alone.
First: “You know what to give me so I can get you out of here safe*”
Second: “Rain doesn’t know about us right?”
And he’s supposedly charming? My guy if you have to blackmail someone into sleeping with you/spending time with you, you’re categorically not charming.
*Safe as I’m not disappeared by big crime boss man. But not safe because he was literally raped so this term is subjective
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do u ever speak too soon & immediately regret it.
#yes this is about the trade that just happened three minutes ago#clown shoes of prophecy in the tumblr tags#no i am not Doing Well#I THOUGHT I WAS GODDAMN SAFE FROM THE BRUINS#to be deleted but i am literally resisting the urge to screech like a feral animal in the gym right now i am being soooooo normal#WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME PERSONALLY SPECIFICALLY I’M GOING TO CRY INTO A HOLE I CAN’T DO THIS NARRATIVE IT’S ONLY DYLAN LEFT YOU TOOK HIM#i have to pretend to be normal :) i have to take an exam :) and function as a human being :) instead of crouching like a bug on the floor#and then i will come home and open up the notes app i made two (?) years ago that says ‘if tyler bertuzzi ever gets traded it’s-’#& everyone will be suffering with me. sorry not sorry for the influx of sad bertuzzi posts that are coming like i have Such a relationship#with him as a player &i know he’s the worst but also it really sucks to watch every guy you thought was the core of ur team get traded away#purely narratively speaking in all bemoaning etc etc etc except for the part where we don’t have a gritty net front presence now &#who’s gonna be larks & lucas’ winger & i just cried about tyler in a fight the other day because mickey said ‘i’m sure he wants to protect#those hands but sometimes you can’t you gotta do it for the boys’ & i think mickey said ‘they’ as in the team wants him to not hurt his hand#again but he has to fight & if that isn’t also v much a part of the old gods detroit it was always tyler champion of blood & guts & giving#& regardless of hockey (EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT IT WAS FOR DRAFT PICKS I HATE DRAFT PICKS WHAT ARE U GONNA DO WITH THOSE like at least if#it’s for a guy i could maybe learn to love him but you never remember who you traded to get those draft picks unless it’s narratively r#relevant later but right now it feels like it’s for nothing & i don’t want to learn to love some new guy in five years i miss tyler already)#anyway. ik full well this won’t cause me to actually finish tyler borzoituzzi bc i haven’t even properly started it but i can dream of spite
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arthur-r · 2 years
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i ran out of storage while drawing this so i had to add the white parts in markup and call the rest of it good but this is “self portrait with future beard and pending scar” and i drew it after surgery this morning
#the outfit is stuff i have in real life and so is the scar except it’s not a scar yet it’s a wound#that’s what my mom keeps on telling me when i say wow this is such a cool scar#which is what i say to not terrify myself about how i might always have this scar#anyway if i had still been in ibispaint for the end of this i would’ve added some bright light behind me#because that’s what i was planning on but then i ran out of storage#anyway hi i did the surgery this morning and it went good the IV hurt and the anesthesia was scary but everything else was good#anyway i was gonna fix the shape when i was still in ibispaint but i would need 250 megabytes of storage and i don’t have it :(#so markup is all i have now shdhdf i can’t erase i can only draw on top#which is mostly how i draw anyway but still#anyway the surgery to make my face look regular again all the way would cost money and not insurance at all#so unless it heals really good on it’s own i might look like this forever#so i started thinking about forever and i reassured myself by adding a beard to the picture. and so. that’s why i drew this shdhdf#anyway i missed my dynamic brush and this was my first time using it in a lot of months and i had missed it shdhdf#idk if this is like. good. to people who aren’t on anesthesia. i will have to find out in the morning#but i wanted to break to you guys that it might never go away. but i did that by drawing instead of a picture#because i get nervous on the internet and especially today#and anyway i hope i still like this in the morning but mostly the point before is i have a scar there now#cause that’s what i had to get to not have a tumor there now. and so it’s better and it’s okay but also makes me nervous#but i’m gonna grow up and it will still be okay and this is scary but the worst dangerous part is over#and this is just maybe what i look like right now and maybe it will heal. but i will just have to find out#me. my post. mine.#my art#delete later
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rosicheeks · 2 years
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😑
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genderqueer-karma · 1 year
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a before prosecution/identity headcanon! (under the cut)
i personally hc that manfred is transmasc, and that his wife is transfem.
that being said, i think they met in college in the 70s, but both of them were still presenting as their assigned genders at birth. i’d say that manfred was about 21 when the two of them met and his wife was about 19/20.
they came out to each other a few months after they started dating (which was at least a year after they met) and about a year later they socially transitioned.
the infinitely more important part, however, is that they were both a part of their university’s symphony orchestra. specifically in the first violin section.
why is this important? well, because i think his wife is around two years younger than him, meaning that when she got to be the concert master/first chair in their section, he was … a bit peeved.
he was the best in the section before she showed up, and he wouldn’t give up his spot so easily, especially to someone younger than him.
this sparked a healthy rivalry/competition between the two of them, which naturally culminated in them falling in love. mush, mush, and more mushy mush. the end <3
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binx0r · 7 months
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Legit question: would it be weird to tell someone
“It makes me happy to know you exist”
Bc like… that’s a sentiment I feel a lot esp when I don’t have the ability to interact as much as I’d like to with people but I see them living their lives and it gives me deeply good feelings
Like regardless of whether we cross paths I know you well enough to appreciate you’re part of the universe and that fact brings me joy
Like is that inappropriate in any way?
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oksfranta · 1 year
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myrcenegirl · 1 year
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Okay but like is it normal… to get fired and finish working for the day and act like nothing happened I’m the crazy one right that’s normal right…..?
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gimmethatagustd · 3 months
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morals on sundays | myg
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You're still in love with your ex-boyfriend. Yoongi offers some help to get over him.
○ Pairing: BFF!Yoongi x f!Reader
○ Rating: Explicit/18+
○ Genre: Friends with benefits, angst, smut, fluff
○ 6 / 100 Drabble Challenge (FWB)
○ Word Count: 2,177
○ Warnings: MC's boyfriend cheated on her, post-breakup blues, questionable decision making, fingering so good you'll try to run away from it, pussy eating, too much tongue sucking probably, Yoongi is a boob guy, they have matching Spongebob and Patrick coffee mugs so why aren't they married?? Idiots
○ Notes: Shout out to @sailoryooons for also writing about a daegu boy eating pussy tonight 😌 And, as usual, I wrote this with scrambled eggs for brains and didn't proofread it, so if you see any errors, no you didn't
○ Post Date: January 22, 2024
○ Masterlist | Send me ur thots
○ What was Jai listening to? Imported - Jessie Reyez ft. 6LACK
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Lately, you’ve felt like disappearing – not into a crowded city street in another country or down an unlit dirt road into the unknown, but into the warm folds of Yoongi’s hoodie. You’re already halfway there, with your fingers interlaced with his, shoved into the large front pocket, and your face tucked into his shoulder. 
“Fuck, I hate taking the bus,” he curses, his words turning into a cloud that disappears into the cold air. 
“How much time do we have?” 
Yoongi turns his head, and his lips briefly touch the cold curve of your ear. 
“You’re mumbling. What’d you say?”
“How much time until it comes?” You squint up at him, cheek still pressed against his shoulder. It’s too warm here to want to move. 
“Can’t check the app on my phone unless you give me my hands.” 
“No.” 
Yoongi chuckles and jostles your head by bobbing his shoulders. 
“I thought our date would cheer you up.” His complaint is playful, eyes sparkling in the streetlights when he returns his gaze to the empty road. You should have gotten a taxi. 
“I’m gonna die alone. Doesn’t matter how much late-night pizza I eat or how many stupid action movies I watch,” you grumble into Yoongi’s shoulder. 
“Even when the action movie lead has a super hot sex scene that’s poorly timed and irrelevant to the plot?” 
“Nope.”
“Even when the coolest guy on the entire planet was the one who took you?” Yoongi smiles cheekily, his gaze back on you. He wiggles his shoulders again, hard enough to bounce your head. 
Annoyed, you straighten up, hands still shoved in his pockets. The movie wasn’t that bad. The pizza was actually great. You’re just depressed. 
“I didn’t think it would take this long…” You whisper into the little space between your body and Yoongi’s. He knows you aren’t talking about the bus. 
Yoongi squeezes your hands inside his hoodie. The rest of you might be freezing in the winter night air, but at least Yoongi keeps your hands warm. He keeps your heart warm, too, with his sincere gaze when he looks at you. 
“You were too good for him.” 
Yoongi’s right. He’s always right. 
You’re sufficiently frozen by the time the bus finally arrives. Yoongi pays for you both because he’s trying to make life easy. No bumps in the road, no unnecessary stress. He lets you sit in a window seat so you can stare out at the blurry night scenery and have your sad main character moment for as long as it takes to get to your apartment. 
Once you arrive, he follows you inside and heads straight to the kitchen while you slump down the hall to your bedroom. The cold seeps so deeply into your bones that the sweatpants and sweater you change into barely help increase your body temperature. 
Maybe it’s because the sweatpants and sweater are your ex-boyfriend’s, and the universe wants to keep your body as cold as his heart was. 
In the kitchen, Yoongi uses a wooden spoon to stir hot chocolate in a small pot, your favorite kind that comes in a block of chocolate that melts with milk. It’s likely been years since Yoongi has made you hot chocolate. Cozy winter nights indoors were once commonplace, the two of you alternating between apartments to make each other snacks and treat cuddles like currency. The appearance of your ex put an end to the comfort you shared with Yoongi. It put an end to most things that brought you comfort. 
As you expect, Yoongi has two mugs out on the counter. You reach for yours, twisting it in your hands as you wait for him to finish. 
“Remember when Spongebob tried to become best friends with Squidward instead of Patrick?” Yoongi asks, turning off the stove. He uses a ladle to pour hot chocolate into his pink mug, then pours some into your yellow one. 
“Yes.” 
“He was Squidward. I’m just mad I didn’t get to blow up his house–” Yoongi laughs and nearly spills his drink when you smack him in the arm, “–with bubbles! With bubbles. I’m not homicidal.” 
Rolling your eyes, you set down your mug next to Yoongi’s, both drinks too hot to drink quickly. 
“Thank you,” you mumble, hooking your finger into his hoodie pocket and tugging lightly, the action absentminded. You keep your eyes cast downward because you don’t want him to see your tears if they run. “I’m sorry I’ve been in such a shitty mood. I know it’s been a while, but, it just… I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about him, and everything fucking hurts…” 
Yoongi slips his fingers under your sleeve and circles your wrist, pulling your hand away from his pocket so he can lace your fingers together. They’re so much warmer now, defrosted by the heat blasting through your apartment and Yoongi’s hot chocolate. 
“Maybe you could start by not wearing his clothes?” Yoongi offers quietly. “Can’t imagine it’s easy to get over someone when you keep them on your body like that.” 
You sniffle and nod. Again, Yoongi is always right. 
“Easier said than done…” you mumble, giving him a weak smile when you finally meet his eyes. There’s something there in his expression, something that seems different. 
You don’t move away when Yoongi steps closer, even when he has you backed against the counter, even when you feel like you’re going to swallow your heart. 
“I could take them off for you,” Yoongi says softly. He lets go of your sleeve to pinch the hem of your sweater, tugging it lightly. “If you can’t do it, I can.” 
“Yeah?” You feel out of breath, maybe because you suck in your stomach when Yoongi’s fingers brush against it. 
“Yeah,” he echoes, fingers sliding along your ribs as he pushes your sweater up. “So you can get over him.” 
It’s a terrible idea, but your stomach flutters when he looks at you with sleepy eyes weighed down by the late hour and lust. He bites his bottom lip, and you feel your resolve slip as easily as Yoongi’s fingers do beneath your clothes. 
“I want to.” The declaration is desperate, and for a moment, you can’t do anything but stare into Yoongi’s eyes with an all-consuming sadness that eats at your insides, gnawing on bones and biting holes into your lungs. “God, Yoongi, I want to.” 
Yoongi touches his forehead to yours, making you close your eyes because he’s too close and you’re too much of a coward. 
“I’m sorry,” Yoongi whispers. His voice is as gentle as his hands on your bare waist, his thumbs caressing your sensitive skin. 
You raise your arms for Yoongi to pull off your sweater. He’s confident when he squeezes your tits, doesn’t even seem caught off guard when he realizes you’re not wearing anything under the sweater. He brushes his thumbs over your nipples as he leans in to kiss you, his tongue tasting sweet from the hot chocolate when he flicks it against yours. 
“Yoongi,” you call out with an airy sigh that harmonizes nicely with the sound of him sucking open-mouthed kisses down your neck. 
“Hmm?” Yoongi hums against the base of your throat, the vibration sending a tingling sensation straight to your clit. He keeps one hand on the counter beside your waist, caging you in, while his other hand cups your pussy over your sweatpants. 
“Oh,” you gasp, your hands immediately finding Yoongi’s firm shoulders when he starts rubbing your clit, occasionally dipping his fingers lower to press against your entrance, soaking the fabric. 
“These are his, too, right?” 
“Y-yes,” you moan as Yoongi pulls down your sweatpants, taking your underwear with them. 
You can’t say you never thought about how attractive Yoongi is; it’s hard to ignore. It’s just that Yoongi is your best friend. If anything were to happen between the two of you, you don’t know if you’d be able to survive losing him, too. You love him. 
But you also love your ex. 
It’s hard to think about that, though, with two of Yoongi’s fingers pumping in and out of your pussy. They’re long, reaching deeper than your own can when you finger yourself, always late at night when you’re lonely. It never feels good after. The clarity always seems to hit too quickly, like being dunked in a pool of ice water. 
Three months. That’s how long it’s been since another person touched you, since you found out your ex-boyfriend had been cheating on you. You didn’t realize how much you missed it until you’ve got your head thrown back and your thighs quivering as Yoongi fucks you with his fingers. You nearly climb up the counter, both wanting him to touch you more and trying to get away because it’s too good. 
Your ex never searched for the spot that would make your legs shake, but Yoongi does. He curls his fingers against your front wall and keeps up his rhythm, moving with your body when you can’t control where it goes. 
“Fuck, right there.” You’re burning up, veins turned to lava that’s rushing toward your core as Yoongi fucks you closer and closer to your orgasm until you’re on the verge of tears because you haven’t been touched in so long and you’re so lonely and you weren’t good enough. You weren’t enough. 
“Wanna make you cum,” Yoongi groans, deep and gravelly, between licking a stripe up your tits and sucking your nipples. 
“Please,” you moan, “Please, I’m so close.” 
Your arousal gushes around his fingers, slicking them up and making your pussy squelch when Yoongi flutters them inside you. He keeps his thumb pressed against your clit, almost too hard. It stops you from bucking your hips, but you can barely stand as it is. 
Yoongi’s lips are back on yours, red from sucking your nipples until it hurt. He whispers against your lips and opens his mouth to let you suck on his tongue with a pathetic whimper. 
“Not yet, though.” 
“Wha– Yoongi, no–” It’s embarrassing how loudly you cry out when Yoongi slips his fingers out of your pussy. You feel the fire in your core simmer until you’re left with a painfully throbbing clit and your juices smeared on your inner thighs. 
“Shhh, you know I always take care of you.” Yoongi shuts you up with a bite to your bottom lip. He leans down slightly to squeeze the backs of your thighs and hoist you up onto the counter. “Lean back.” 
The cold marble counter sends shivers across your body, but it can’t keep up with the heat of Yoongi’s mouth on your pussy. He kisses your lips so gently that you think you might actually cry before he pushes your thighs back, opening you up. 
“Oh fuck,” you moan as Yoongi goes straight for your clit, sucking on it as he swirls his tongue around it. You dig your hands into his hair and tug the strands hard enough to make him moan into your pussy. “Use your, use–” 
Yoongi laps at your clit in quick, consistent bursts that fall in line with the tempo he’s fucking you to with two fingers again. His free hand presses against your lower abdomen, keeping your body taunt so you don’t buck into his face or curl inward. It’s bad enough that you can’t stop your legs from shaking when one rests on his shoulder and the other drapes over the crook of his arm. 
It’s messy and loud, Yoongi licking and sucking your pussy like he really is trying to empty your mind of everything but the way the tip of his hot, wet tongue feels swirling your clit and the stretch of his fingers when he slips a third inside you and focuses on massaging the sensitive part of your walls. It’s working. He completely consumes your senses, down to how gorgeous he looks staring at you from between your thighs. 
Your Yoongi, fingerfucking you and sucking your clit like you’re his favorite meal. 
You try not to bang your head against the counter when you finally cum, instead focusing the overwhelming energy into pulling Yoongi’s hair to keep his face in your pussy.
He continues fucking you with his fingers through your orgasm, to the point that you can’t lie still any longer. 
“Yoongi, oh my god, Yoongi, it’s too much,” you whimper and gasp, thighs closing around his head until he finally eases his fingers out of you. 
Strings of your arousal connect his lips with your pussy until he swipes his tongue along his bottom lip, cutting them off. His bangs are pushed off his forehead and his hair sticks up from you pulling on it, but his eyes sparkle and his cheeks are just as rosy as his pink, slicked-up lips. 
“Shit,” Yoongi murmurs, leaning over you on the counter to kiss you. He shoves his tongue in your mouth and lets you suck your juices from it. 
You think you taste better on Yoongi’s tongue than on your ex’s. 
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Disclaimer: All my writing is fictional and for entertainment purposes only. None of these characters are meant to actually represent the real people mentioned in the stories. 
All rights reserved © @gimmethatagustd​ - Do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my writing. Do not use my writing for any AI purposes whatsoever. Do not use my fics for anything aside from reading and commenting on them. My fics will only be posted on this Tumblr and on AO3 (gimmethatagustd & daddytaehyungie). Request an AO3 account here. 
@jooniesxbby @seokteoksworld @taegeum @dprmoon @chimmisbae
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pucksandpower · 2 months
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Blackmail Material
Charles Leclerc x Reader
Summary: you love your boyfriend more than life itself but who can blame you for keeping a folder of all the blackmail material he has given you over the years … just in case
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You hear a bloodcurdling scream from the other room. “Y/N! Come quick!” Charles yells.
You rush over to find him standing on top of the couch, a look of sheer terror on his face. “What’s wrong?” You ask.
He points a shaky finger at the floor. “Sp-spider!”
You look down to see a tiny little spider no bigger than a blueberry crawling across the hardwood. You have to stop yourself from laughing at the sight of your brave Formula 1 driver boyfriend absolutely losing it over this tiny critter.
“Really? That’s what all the fuss is about?” You don’t bother to keep the amusement out of your voice.
“Don’t laugh!” He says indignantly. “It’s a monster! Kill it, please!”
You kneel down and take a closer look at the offending arachnid. “Aww, it’s just a little jumping spider,” you say. “It’s actually kind of cute.”
Charles makes a strangled sound of disbelief. “Cute? It’s a beast from the depths of hell! I want it gone!”
You roll your eyes affectionately. “You race cars at over 300 kilometers per hour, but you’re scared of a little spider barely bigger than a piece of lint?”
“Yes! Spiders are my worst fear. Now stop teasing me and get rid of it!” He gives you his best pleading look from his perch on top of the couch.
“Alright, alright,” you acquiesce, grabbing an empty glass from the coffee table. You gently trap the spider under it and slide a piece of cardstock underneath, trapping the spider safely.
“Is it dead? Please tell me you killed it,” Charles asks hopefully.
“Of course not, I’m just going to let it go outside. Spiders are good, they eat other bugs.”
Charles visibly shudders. “Well get it out of here! I don’t want to see it ever again.”
You carry the spider carefully to the sliding door and release it on the balcony. When you come back inside, Charles is still standing on the couch looking suspiciously around at the floor.
“The horrible beast has been banished, you can come down now,” you say.
He hesitantly steps back down onto the floor. “Are you sure it’s gone? You didn’t just give it free reign to run wild in the apartment?”
You try and fail to hold back a laugh. “Yes, I’m sure. Your life is no longer in peril.”
He narrows his eyes at you. “This isn’t funny! Spiders are evil creatures with too many legs and eyes. They should not exist.”
You go over and wrap your arms around him comfortingly, though you’re still struggling not to giggle. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh. But you have to admit, it’s kind of silly that someone who races cars at death-defying speeds could be so terrified of a tiny spider.”
He huffs indignantly. “It’s a completely rational fear. They’re all legs and eyes and they move so fast and erratically and some of them can be venomous. Absolutely horrifying.”
You smile indulgently and kiss his cheek. “Okay, I get it. I promise I’ll protect you if any more evil spiders invade our home.”
“Thank you,” he says, finally relaxing into your arms now that the threat has passed.
But you just can’t resist teasing him a little more. “It was just so small!”
He pulls back and gives you an unamused look. “You’re not going to let this go anytime soon, are you?”
You grin impishly. “Letting my big macho boyfriend stand on the couch and scream because of a teeny tiny spider? Yeah, probably not gonna let you live this one down for a while.”
Charles groans. “This is so unfair. The guys will never let me hear the end of it if they find out.”
You pat his shoulder sympathetically. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell anyone that Charles Leclerc is terrified of itsy bitsy spiders.”
And if you happened to save evidence of his freak out just in case? Well … it’s not technically telling anyone unless you share the video.
***
You can’t help but grin as Charles paces back and forth in your New York hotel room, running his hands through his hair in distress.
“Chill out babe, I’m sure the airline will find your luggage soon,” you try to soothe him.
Charles whips around, eyes wide. “Chill out? How can I chill out when my La Mer is missing? Do you have any idea how long it took me to perfect my skincare routine?”
You stifle a laugh at his dramatics. “I mean, it’s just skincare products. Not the end of the world.”
“Just skincare products?” Charles looks at you in horror. “That’s like saying a Ferrari is just a car! La Mer is the cream of the crop, the holy grail of skin care! My face needs it to survive!”
You can’t hold back your grin anymore. “Wow, didn’t realize I was dating such a high maintenance diva,” you tease.
Charles huffs, crossing his arms. “I am not high maintenance, I just have discerning taste and an appreciation for quality.”
“Uh huh, sure,” you say. “Is that why you made us stop at three different Whole Foods on the way here from the airport until you found your favorite protein shake?”
“That is completely different,” Charles protests. “My skin is very sensitive, I can’t just use any old drugstore products.”
You laugh and pull Charles onto the couch next to you. “You’re cute when you pout.”
He tries to keep a straight face but ends up cracking a smile. “I can’t help it, I’m freaking out! Do you know how dry airplanes are? My skin is going to be a flaky desert by tomorrow.”
You run a hand through his hair. “Aww poor baby. However will you cope without your six hundred dollar moisturizer?”
Charles narrows his eyes at you. “You joke, but this is serious stuff. Do you want a boyfriend with wrinkles and acne?”
“I mean, a few wrinkles never hurt anyone,” you say, kissing his cheek.
He gasps dramatically. “Don’t even joke about that! I’ll be twenty seven soon, wrinkle prevention needs to start now.”
You shake your head in amusement. “Most twenty seven year olds aren’t this worried about wrinkles. But I guess Formula 1 drivers really are high maintenance.”
“With good reason! We can’t have crows feet interfering with our vision,” Charles says matter-of-factly.
You give him a look. “You’re just making things up now.”
Charles holds your hands, looking deeply into your eyes. “Mon amour, you must understand. Athletes age in dog years. We need anti-aging products just to keep up.”
You burst out laughing, shoving him playfully. “You’re so full of it!”
Charles grins cheekily. “But you love me anyway.”
You lean in and give him a soft kiss. “Yeah I do. Even if you are a high maintenance diva.”
Charles puts a hand to his chest in mock offense. “I thought girlfriends were supposed to be supportive! My skincare is obviously very important to me.”
You snuggle up next to him, running a hand through his hair. “You’re right, I’m sorry. Tell me all about this super special moisturizer.”
His eyes light up. “Well first of all it contains like crushed up diamonds or something. And they freeze each jar before shipping it to keep the ingredients ultra fresh.”
You make a mental note to Google this later, since it sounds completely absurd that diamonds would be an effective skincare ingredient. Though with Charles, you can never be too sure.
“Uh huh, diamonds. That’s totally normal,” you say, playing along.
“Exactly! And the founder makes sure each jar charges under the energy of a full moon before it’s sold. It’s really an intricate artisanal process.” Charles sighs longingly.
You smile and kiss his pouting lips. “You’re cute. I promise your skin will survive one night without magic moon diamonds.”
Charles snuggles against your shoulder. “I know, I know. Skincare is just part of my routine, it makes me feel relaxed and put together. And smelling like citrus blossoms is an added bonus.”
You kiss the top of his head. “I get that. Hopefully the airline finds your stuff soon. But in the meantime, want me to see if anyone sells La Mer nearby?”
Charles perks up. “Ooh yes, let’s check! I saw they have a Dior down the block too.”
You laugh and take his hand. “Of course they do. Come on, let’s go spoil you with new overpriced skincare products until yours turn up.”
***
You walk into the kitchen and see your boyfriend standing at the counter, a pile of uncooked spaghetti next to him. He takes a portion in his hand … which he proceeds to snap in half before dropping it into the pot of boiling water on the stove.
“Charles! What are you doing?” You exclaim in shock.
He turns to you, confused. “What do you mean? I’m just making sure the pasta will fit better in the pot.”
“But you can’t break spaghetti before cooking it!” You say incredulously. “That’s like a cardinal sin in Italy!”
Charles laughs. “Oh come on, it’s not that big of a deal. The pasta will cook just fine this way.”
You shake your head in disbelief. “I can’t believe Il Predestinato is out here breaking pasta. Do you have any idea how offensive Italians would find this?”
“I’m sure they will survive the absolute tragedy of some broken spaghetti,” he jokes.
You nod to your phone. “It’s a good thing I’m recording this for posterity then. The whole country needs to know about this travesty.”
Charles’ eyes go wide. “What? No, don’t record me!” He reaches for your phone but you spin away, giggling.
“The people of Italy deserve to know the truth about their hero!” You declare dramatically.
“Mon ange, please give me the phone,” he pleads, trying to grab your arm. You dance out of reach.
“Truth and justice will prevail!” You continue recording as Charles chases you around the kitchen island.
“Come on, delete it! This could start an international incident if it gets out!”
You pause to catch your breath, phone held high. “An international inchident? Wow, look at you being all dramatic now. I thought it wasn’t a big deal?”
Charles runs a hand through his hair in exasperation. “I didn’t think you’d actually record it as blackmail material! Please, mon amour, I’m begging you, delete the video.”
You pretend to think about it. “Hmm I don’t know … this seems like prime viral video content. Scuderia Ferrari Driver Destroys Pasta, Enrages Italy. Can you imagine the views it would get?”
“Y/N!” Charles lunges forward and tackles you onto the living room couch. You shriek with laughter as he tries to pry the phone from your grip.
“Noooo my video!” You yell dramatically.
Charles pins your arms above your head with one hand and reaches for the phone with the other. “Give it to me!”
You squirm underneath him. “Never!”
He leans down until his face is just inches from yours. “What’s it going to take for you to delete that video, huh?” His voice is low and gravelly.
You catch your breath, hyper aware of his body pressing against yours. “I don’t know, what are you offering?” You ask cheekily.
Charles brushes his nose against yours. “What if I made you your favorite dinner tomorrow night?”
You tilt your chin up in defiance. “That’s all I get for deleting potential internet gold? I don’t think so.”
He moves even closer, his lips just barely grazing your cheek. “Okay, what if I take you out for a nice date too? Dinner and a show at the opera, your choice.” His breath is warm against your skin.
You close your eyes for a second, affected by his closeness but not ready to give in yet. “Tempting, but I think this video is worth even more than that.”
Charles makes a small noise of frustration before capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. You melt into it for a blissful moment before pulling back slightly.
“Well that’s certainly a start,” you murmur, your heart racing.
Charles lets go of your hands to cradle your face tenderly. “Mon cœur, please delete the video. I’m begging you. I’ll do anything.”
You search his eyes intently. “Anything?”
“Anything,” he confirms fervently before kissing you again, deeper this time.
You wrap your arms around his neck and give yourself over to the kiss. After several heated moments, you gently break away.
“Okay fine, I’ll delete the video on one condition.”
Charles looks at you warily. “Name it.”
“You have to let me drive your Ferrari.”
Charles groans and drops his head against your shoulder. “You’re killing me, you know that?”
You laugh and pat his head consolingly. “Those are my terms.”
He lifts his head to grin ruefully at you. “You drive a hard bargain. But for the sake of Italian nonnas everywhere, I accept your deal.”
You lift up your phone and pretend to wipe away a tear. “The souls of broken spaghetti can finally rest easy.”
Charles just shakes his head before leaning down to silence you with another deep kiss. As you lose yourself in the feeling of his body against yours, you quietly move the video into an encrypted folder. After all, you never know when it might come in handy.
***
You raise an eyebrow as you watch Charles carefully pour Red Bull into his Ferrari water bottle. “Do you buy those in bulk?” You ask with a laugh.
Charles gasps in exaggerated outrage. “Buy from the enemy? Never!” He screws the cap on tightly and gives you a sly grin. “Max and I have an arrangement.”
“An arrangement?” You echo in surprise. This is news to you.
Charles nods, looking pleased with himself. “Yes, a secret trade deal. I provide him cappuccinos from the Ferrari cafe and Max supplies me with as much Red Bull as I need.”
You burst out laughing. “Are you serious? You and Max smuggle each other contraband caffeinated drinks?”
“Shh, not so loud!” Charles glances around furtively, but the motorhome is empty except for the two of you. “It must remain a secret.”
Still chuckling, you lower your voice conspiratorially. “So the great Charles Leclerc betrays his team for energy drinks. The Tifosi would riot if they knew!”
Charles winces dramatically. “Do not say such things! It is not betrayal, merely … creative problem solving.” He takes a long swig of Red Bull and grins. “The taste of the enemy is sweet.”
“I can’t believe you drink that stuff. And I can’t believe Max is your supplier!” You shake your head in amusement. “Does anyone else know about this arrangement of yours?”
“Only Lando. We needed a neutral third party to broker the deal and make the exchanges.” Charles leans in with a playful smile. “So do not be getting any ideas about exposing our scheme, yes?”
You mimic zipping your lips. “My lips are sealed … as long as you share some of that!”
Charles pretends to think about it for a second before breaking into a grin and handing you the bottle. The carbonated liquid fizzes pleasantly on your tongue, the familiar flavor mingling with the surrealness of drinking Red Bull from a Ferrari bottle. You take one more sip then hand it back to Charles.
“Just don’t let Fred or Christian find out,” you warn teasingly. “Pretty sure this counts as treason.”
Charles just laughs. “They turn a blind eye. The team knows I perform best when properly caffeinated.” He caps the bottle and adds, “But no more for you, ma belle. I only have a limited supply!”
You pout dramatically. “Fine, keep your precious Red Bull. I guess I’ll just have to tell everyone what’s really in your water bottle!”
The can of Red Bull that Charles rushes to give you tastes even sweeter than usual.
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