#I’m getting an A+ in humaning

[foldingfittedsheets]

I feel the need to share since my lube post is going around that my life is just like that since I worked at the sex shop. Sex Ed is a very standard topic. People just immediately pick up a vibe from me and even in situations where someone doesn’t know I used to sling dildos for a living they’ll just start confiding sex stuff to me.

Not in a creeper way. But like this weight had been lifted and they can finally talk freely about sexual topics. The energy I put off is just so blasé and accepting that people tell me about their sex lives, usually very quickly after meeting me. They usually then have a moment of panic or regret and apologize but I always reassure them that I used to work in a shop and that I see nothing odd about talking about it.

My go-to line is, “I’m a creature devoid of judgement.” They always laugh. Then the questions get more specific or people start asking for brand recommendations. It’s always been funny to me.

My beloved has always been a little confused by it. “People don’t just start talking to me about sex! I know you don’t bring it up. It just always seems to go there when people talk to you.”

“It’s just my energy.”

The first time I was meeting their mom she was coming to stay with us. We picked her up from the airport and brought her home. My beloved went upstairs to use the bathroom. When they came back down their mom was asking me questions about vibrators and their jaw hit the floor.

In our room later they said, “She doesn’t even talk to me about that stuff! She’s so embarrassed about sex topics, I cannot believe she was asking you about that!”

“What can I say,” I shrugged, “I’m a creature devoid of judgement.”

#ramblies #ffs foibles #funny #story #writing #they also note the amount of times I’m approached by strangers for random stuff #most recently was a woman looking for a hair model for beauty school #afterward my beloved was just like what is your life that people randomly come up to you #I’m getting an A+ in humaning

[elodieunderglass]

changes and trends in horror-genre films are linked to the anxieties of the culture in its time and place. Vampires are the manifestation of grappling with sexuality; aliens, of foreign influence. Horror from the Cold War is about apathy and annihilation; classic Japanese horror is characterised by “nature’s revenge”; psychological horror plays with anxieties that absorbed its audience, like pregnancy/abortion, mental illness, femininity. Some horror presses on the bruise of being trapped in a situation with upsetting tasks to complete, especially ones that compromise you as a person - reflecting the horrors and anxieties of capitalism etc etc etc. Cosmic horror is slightly out of fashion because our culture is more comfortable with, even wistful for, “the unknown.” Monster horror now has to be aware of itself, as a contingent of people now live in the freedom and comfort of saying “I would willingly, gladly, even preferentially fuck that monster.” But I don’t know much about films or genres: that ground has been covered by cleverer people.

I don’t actually like horror or movies. What interests me at the moment is how horror of the 2020s has an element of perception and paying attention.

Multiple movies in one year discussed monsters that killed you if you perceived them. There are monsters you can’t look at; monsters that kill you instantly if you get their attention. Monsters where you have to be silent, look down, hold still: pray that they pass over you. M Zombies have changed from a hand-waved virus that covers extras in splashy gore, to insidious spores. A disaster film is called Don’t Look Up, a horror film is called Nope. Even trashy nun horror sets up strange premises of keeping your eyes fixed on something as the devil GETS you.

No idea if this is anything. (I haven’t seen any of these things because, unfortunately, I hate them.) Someone who understands better than me could say something clever here, and I hope they do.

But the thing I’m thinking about is what this will look like to the future, as the Victorian sex vampires and Cold War anxieties look to us. I think they’ll have a little sympathy, but they probably won’t. You poor little prey animals, the kids will say, you were awfully afraid of facing up to things, weren’t you?

#this is the sort of observation I make here that people #go off and write their thesis about #so while I’m not expecting to be the first or cleverest person to say this #if you do use it as a springboard #tell me if you get a good grade ok? #I’ll be tremendously proud of you #like if you take a shitpost and use it to craft deep attentive thought on something important #I just think that’s probably the most noble use of a human brain #it makes me want to take off my hat and slam it to the ground in inexpressible emotion #it’s a cowboy hat btw #and I say something like GOLDURN IT THAT KID SURE HAS DELIVERED. #ok so don’t deny me this #especially if you correct me after a long research journey #GOLDURN IT THE KID IS RIGHT!

[twinstxrs]

idk if this is accurate but i’ve felt like in previous seasons riz & gorgug have been one of the inter-bad kids dynamics we’ve seen the least of & this season has been so great in that aspect. gorgug having helped make some of riz’s magic gear. riz helping gorgug with his studies. the shared birthday party. gorgug’s gift to riz being something he himself made to protect riz. riz’s gift to gorgug being something he illegally grabbed to protect gorgug. gorgug who utilizes rage to put his body on the line for his friends & riz who will take deep levels of mental stress for his friends. even though it was within the context of a joke, riz calling gorgug an “absolute sweetie.” like yea they might not be in a band together or both part of a presidential campaign team or owlbears teammates, but they’d go to war for each other, because they’re best friends.

#riz gukgak #gorgug thistlespring #fantasy high #dimension 20 #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #these kids are all so self-sacrificing but i do think riz gorgug are the most clear (& juxtaposed) self-sacrificers #riz will mentally tear himself to pieces and get lost in cases and take on ungodly levels of stress for those he loves #gorgug will use himself as a human shield. he will take hit after hit if it means his friends are okay. #and they’d both do the other thing too. riz would let himself get hit for gorgug. gorgug would pull all nighters & take stress for riz. #even if mechanically they can’t or it wouldn’t make sense. they would if they could. #also #the starstruck barry mechanic of being a guard is so gorgug. it’s soooo gorgug like that’s literally him #anyways love this tall green guy & this short green guy so much #especially because gorgug is tall & considered intimidating but protective in a deeply kind way #while riz is short & underestimated but protective in a deeply vicious way (affectionate) #i hope this makes sense but i think riz is primarily ‘i would kill for you’ & gorgug is primarily ‘i would die for you’ maybe #this does not mean gorgug would not kill for riz or riz would not die for gorgug. they both would. #but those are the primary ways their love manifests due to the nature of their strengths/personalities. To Me #idk this is all just me saying stuff when i should be sleeping 😭 #sorry if i missed a riz gorgug moment in the main post btw i’m tired

[fmayyy]

Some more human Al’s

Not a deer yet but definitely a party animal 🤙

#alastor #human alastor #alastor fanart #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanart #my art #still not really happy with the way I draw him but idk I’m getting there! #my style is just funamentally sooooooo different from the style of the series #that translating it is sooooo hard wahhhhh #but I will work on it some more and eventually land on something I’m happy with #he just doesn’t look deranged enough yet but WERE GETTING THERE #1k

[lizaisdrawing]

Collection of sketches, that I will possibly render later.

#welcome home #wally darling #clownillustrations #welcome home puppet show #my art #fanart #digital art #puppeteer wally #human wally darling #sketch #anatomy practice #but with welcome home #because ofc #there’s a few I want to render #also I’m practicing drawing the others #I will showcase them slowly but surely #poor howdy #I’ll get to you I promise #Wallace is not a Spanish dancer #I just wanted to draw him like that :3 #human julie joyful #human sally starlet #human frank frankly #human Eddie dear #human barnaby beagle

[communistkenobi]

students in the social sciences can’t explain it either lol. “people in this country see no merit in studying any subject that cannot go on a resume” that’s because they go to school to get a job! I wonder what larger structural factors contribute to this widespread relationship people have to higher education. maybe this guy can use his big beautiful humanities degree to explain it to us

#‘this country’ I’m assuming this person is American also which is doubly laughable #I wonder why people going into tens of thousands of dollars into debt want to focus on shit that will get them a job. impossible to know #also profoundly arrogant & self serving. I’m sure this is a humanities person because they all believe art is inherently revolutionary #and artists are the most oppressed special and uniquely capable labourers on the planet

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 218

“Moom, there’s yellow-eyed creeps fighting ninjas outside the window again!” 

Danny sighed, taking a deep breath- in for ten, out for eight- as he set the pot he was cleaning back in the sink. Dan- currently six- came running in from the living room of the apartment, where he was watching TV. Or he should have been if not for the bullshit outside. 

He sighed again, picking up baby Ellie- currently closer to two- out of her highchair (even if she could just float out) and let his oldest drag him to the window. Sure enough, another fight was happening, with no vigilante in sight stopping it. Look, he knew most people didn’t live here, but it was still rude. 

“Jordan, remember how I told you how violence isn’t always the answer?” Danny asked sweetly, Dan’s expression shifting to a wicked grin as he opened the window. “Feel free to practice tossing some fireballs while I clean up your sister, yeah?” 

Ah, the sweet sound of surprised cursing and startled ecto-signatures. Maybe they’d be polite enough to take their spar elsewhere. 

#DCxDP #DPxDC #Danny: I’m going to be a better parent than my parents & not get distracted by work #He has a couple of the clones’ cores too #Does it count as mpreg? #Danny has a garden shop/bookstore at ground level #He’s gotten better at cooking but he doesn’t trust them not to come alive so he sticks to drinks #Halfas are like phoenixes when they have to retreat to their core #They come out as babies thanks to having to rebuild their human flesh body from scratch #Why yes they’re in Gotham- he’s lived in several different cities over the last few decades #Doesn’t look a day over thirty somehow (it’s the ectoplasm) #Space Core Danny #Sun Core Dan #Moon Core Ellie #Why yes he named his clone-sons after stars #Shadow Core Orion #Bed Sheet Ghost #Earth Core Rigel #Monster Ghost #Light Core Algor #Tiny Ghost #Sun Core Draco #Yes Danny is an adult with a pair of small children & 4 more on the way what of it #dad danny #Mom Danny #He is both #prompts

[pandoraslxna]

Neteyam x female human reader x So‘lek

⋆｡° ✮ Look at this omg!!! 😩

⋆｡° ✮ Warnings: threesome (mmf), spitroating, p in v, oral, hints of anal, size kink, praise, reader is basically their human sex toy but she’s into it (and so am i)

⋆｡° ✮ this is for my lovely @neteyamsyawntu and was definitely inspired by our conversation from yesterday 😌🩵

Forming an alliance between clans is a difficult task, but Neteyam has his ways of convincing different na’vi of importance to join the omatikaya. Everyone has a soft spot for something, it’s just about finding out what it is. And by the way the leader of the resistance had been ogling you the first time you met, Neteyam knew just what that soft spot was for him.

"You said you have more humans like her in your clan?" So‘leks voice is calm and steady as he eyes the warrior in front of him. Neteyams grins.

"Many. Like I said, I promise they can be trusted."

So‘leks gaze wanders down to where his hands are squeezing the delicate curves of your hips, so fragile under his touch. You’re warm and soft, and he uses his firm grip to pull you back against his deep thrusts. He enjoys the little noises you make around Neteyams cock, whenever his own brushes against your cervix with ease. Such a small little thing, he thinks.

Tilting his head, he admires the view of your back as it arches further, the faster he pounds you from behind. Despite the suffocating tightness of your sweet little cunt, there comes no sign of distress from you, only sounds of pleasure mixed with the clicking of the dog tags around his neck.

"She’s so tight", he chuckles lowly, his thumbs drawing soothing circles on your hips, "but she takes it so good."

"Hmh", Neteyam purrs proudly, brushing a gentle hand through your hair to keep them out of your face. "I trained her well. She’s always so eager to serve me, am I right? Such a good girl for me."

You make a gagging noise just as the tip of Neteyams cock hits the back of your throat, and then clench around So‘leks. They both appreciate the way you moan around his length in agreement, with low grunts and groans from deep within their chests.

"If all humans in your clan are like her, I’ll gladly join", the warrior smiles down at the little human almost fondly.

You whine and squirm between the two na‘vi, thick strings of saliva dripping from your mouth around Neteyams cock when he draws away. You moan louder as you finally catch a gasp of air, but it’s quickly muffled when he pushes his length all the way back inside your mouth. They continue to fuck you between their two lean bodies, pushing you back and forth, gentle but firm.

"Not all", Neteyam admits with a chuckle, "but if she likes you, I promise to share her again. That is, if you accept my offer and fight with us?"

It’s a question that hangs heavy in the air, and So‘lek is almost too distracted by the pulsing of your sweet pussy as you come around his throbbing length to find the words to respond to the other man. Your moans turn more high pitched as they both fuck you through it, and it amazes him how little effort it takes to get you trembling. He really could get used to this…

"So, are you in?" Neteyam asks, just as he tightens the grip on your hair and pushes your pretty, swollen lips further down his cock. He holds you there for a long moment, So‘lek watching your throat constrict around him as you swallow what he assumes is Neteyams cum, before he finally pulls you off again so you could catch a breath of much needed air.

It’s a tempting offer that only gets more appetizing when the na‘vi in front of you crouches down and seems to be whispering something in your tiny, round ear, before placing a tender kiss to your forehead. A flustered blush spreads over your cheeks as you suddenly shuffle into a different position, your back arching even more and your cheek resting on the cold hard floor now.

"Maybe that will help make up your mind, brother", Neteyam grins a knowing grin as you reach behind yourself and spread your ass for So‘lek to see, the small puckered hole clenching around nothing. The warrior swallows thickly at the sight.

He‘s still inside you, holding onto your hips and keeping himself buried to the hilt. What finally snaps him out of his admiration, is your whiny voice calling out for him.

"S-So‘lek", you whimper, pleading with those big round eyes staring back at him over your shoulder. Pleading for more, something, anything.

So‘leks gaze then meets Neteyams, who nods at him with a cocky smirk,

"Join us. I promise, you will benefit of this alliance."

#can you believe I wrote this in 20 minutes #I’m just so h word for them both #had to get this out before kinkmas #Neteyam #atwow #so‘lek #avatar #avatar the way of water #avatar 2 #atwow neteyam #neteyam smut #neteyam sully #neteyam x female reader #neteyam x female reader smut #neteyam x you #avatar neteyam #neteyam sully smut #neteyam sully x reader #neteyam x human reader #neteyam x reader smut #so‘lek x reader #so‘lek x female reader #so‘lek x female reader smut #avatar frontiers of pandora

[marisatomay]

“I can’t believe Tom Cruise of all people would stand up for his agent, a Muslim Libyan-American woman, who was being publicly blacklisted for her support of Palestine and calling out the ongoing genocide, including making a rare in-person appearance to CAA headquarters in LA to express his support for her. What a strange person who can ever guess what opinions he will have.”

Look. I’ve studied Tom Cruise a lot. One could even call me a Cruisologist. (Not to be confused with. Well.) And, it’s actually really easy to predict Tom Cruise’s opinion on something. The tricky part is whether it will be made public in a timely manner or not and, if it’s made public at all, will it be a lede buried in favor of pushing a narrative sold on background by a studio exec he pissed off because he didn’t roll over and take their bullshit.

#can’t wait for someone to yell at me for this post so let’s get some things over with: #I know more than you. I don’t care. #but for the record: this post isn’t ‘tom cruise: perfect human who’s never done anything wrong’ #it’s ‘tom cruise: complicated person who has lived his entire adult life under an intense microscope and as a result is incredibly private #and tends to not share anything good or bad which has allowed tabloids to fill gaps as they please for clicks.’ #I wouldn’t say he’s a Good Person. I’m just saying he’s a Person.

[hamburgernotsohelpful]

From The brink of suicide to Getting help, We Stan a Mental Health King

#fionna campbell #adventure time #fionna and cake #adventure #cake the cat #finn the human #my heart #fionna and cake spoilers #fionna mertens #fionna the human #adventure time fionna #simon petrikov #I’m glad he’s getting help #minerva campbell #adveture time #adventure time fiona and cake spoilers #mental health matters #these cartoons are great #hbo max

[agentarc]

captain rex with a dixie cup background i guess!!!!!!

#star wars #the clone wars #sw tcw #clone trooper #captain rex #sw rex #tcw rex #i’ve been drawing humans for likeeeee a whole month #i’m getting there #jackart #agentarcadia

[raplinenthusiasts]

Outro: TEAR

© namuspromised

#I’m rapline enthusiast first and human second #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #bts #btsgif #dailybts #dailybangtan #userbangtan #cyphernet #usersky #annietrack #userdimple #userpat #tuserandi #uservans #useremmeline #*mine #teared paper would probably worked better but i love this shattered glass effect #i'm only midly satisfied with this but here we go #i have to finally let out my new thoughts about this performance! #in every rapline performance rapline always sticks together #I KNOW because i giffed so most of their performances and it's so easy to find moments with at least two of them #BUT TEAR? #i always complained i can't get them in one frame properly and it's like on purpose?! #AND I THOUGHT WELL IT'S LIKE THE LYRICS #im so stupid! #they rap about the tear and going different paths and everything that comes with this song #OF COURSE THEY ARE APART IN THE PERFORMANCE #they come togather only at the same end when hobi finishes

[crowleave]

ok so the thing is, the kiss really was the best way crowley knew to convey his feelings to aziraphale because nina and maggie were right, they do talk but they never say what they mean.

but that doesn’t mean they don’t understand each other, at least to a certain extent.

and crowley knows aziraphale

he knows that he loves books and plays and the stories made by humanity. he watches his angel learn magic the human way and finds out he learned french the human way and knows better than anyone how much he loves human food. he throws a ball to get nina and maggie together because that’s what the humans in jane austen novels would do.

crowley knows that aziraphale romanticizes humanity, loves the drama and the stories and every little thing that makes humans human.

and what could be more human than a desperate kiss asking someone to stay

#good omens #and don’t get me started on crowley #crowley loves humanity too but it’s more than that #crowley loves the universe #crowley loves humans but he also loves the earth and the animals and the nebulas #he’s the first one to point out the goats were blameless too in the job situation #he loves every part of the creation that he helped build #and that’s why he questions it every time god wants to destroy all of their beautiful creations #because why make this beautiful world just to destroy it #in conclusion: aziraphale loves the world and crowley loves the universe and they both love each and i’m always in pain #i definitely went off on a tangent there but i just love them so much

[berlingotesque]

Watched Hazbin Hotel. The brainrot is real, guys.

#I’m so sorry for my non-Hazbin Hotel enjoyers #but i needed to get it out #so here’s a doodle dump ! #the show is pretty mid but the designs grggmm #hazbin hotel #huskerdust #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel alastor #staticradio #radiostatic #one sided radiostatic #or is it…? #did some human designs by the way because I love theeeem #the last drawing is a collab with @//charlinecarter #she did the lines and flat colors and I did the shading hihi

[lazylittledragon]

discussion: would gale accept only getting a few decades with his partner because he’s a squishy human OR would he go the lich route a la barry bluejeans

#ramble #bg3 #gale dekarios #today i realised that gale would only get 40-60 years with cyra and she’d have centuries without him and i got sad #i’m v curious what everyone else thinks??? #bc on one hand he was very willing to just explode but that was probably a guilt thing? #but also i feel like. he wants to do more stuff #maybe i’m just not over barold j. bluejeans turning himself into the essence of his magic to be with his elf wife forever idk #if i had a nickel for every time i became deranged over a human wizard with a rabid elf wife with red hair #i’d have 2 nickels which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice

[little-pondhead]

I forgot about this.

The whole reasoning behind the Supervillain Danny AU sketches was that his villain persona was the complete opposite of his normal, sane self and hero persona. Danny plays into the Fenton name really hard, and ramps up the “mad scientist” bit, taking inspiration from both his normal civilian life and his parents, thus using just his last name as a villain.

And then I wanted to add what Sam and Tucker might look like if they joined in on his shenanigans. To keep with the “opposite of their normal life” bit, let’s throw in some ghostly artifacts that help the two keep up with Fenton’s madness.

Sam would get an angel’s halo that helps her form ghostly wings, and she’d play into the good-two shoes angelic look, and then she opens her mouth and verbally assaults you. She pins her bangs back and wears clothes that better fit a celestial aesthetic and uses all the etiquette training her parents taught her. Manson looks like some sort of regal angel and people expect her to be the nicest out of all of them. She’s not. Manson is the sneakiest and most bloodthirsty one, and heroes regularly wonder if she has actually committed murder or not.

Tucker takes inspiration from his time as a pharaoh. He has a metal postiche that enhances his physical ability. (Maybe it gives him dreadlocks too, but I like to think Tucker is just wearing a whole ass wig.) He wears a strange mix of street wear and his pharaoh outfit, and throws his tech-obsessed self out the window. Fenton is the nerdy one here, so now Foley is the muscle. Foley plays up meathead American bully stereotype hard. He delights in throwing hands, and hunts down supers just for the sake of a fun spar. (For him not for the supers.) Foley’s favorite people to fight so far is Killer Croc and Superman. Heroes are concerned about what would happen if Foley fought for real, but then they saw what he did to the Joker “as a joke” and decided not to ask any more questions.

Basically, the trio looked at their civilian lives and picked out what they considered “villainous traits” from the people around them that they then played into as villains themselves. If that makes sense. Sam hates how her parents want a perfect child, so she makes herself look like one. She speaks in backhanded comments and has a snooty attitude, which she learned from other rich people. Tucker is constantly confronted by bullies everyday, and all the rogues that come to Amity are always fighting, so that’s what he decides to mimic. Yeah, he now gets to be the big and strong protector of the group, but all his experience with fighting have been bad ones, and that reflects in his style. And finally, Danny. Why does he take after his parents and play into the family name? Because the Fentons are one of the biggest obstacles and source of anxiety in his life. Danny associates mad scientists to pain and other bad things, so even if all he’s being helpful in a really annoying way as a villain, his parents and the threat of the GIW still influence how he presents himself. Because to Danny, those two things are far more scary than a kid with a pirate ship or a man wearing a bat fursuit.

#pondhead blurbs #danny phantom #dp x dc #danny fenton #sam manson #tucker foley #supervillain danny au #mad scientist danny #god does any of this make sense??? #it’s literally just a sketch #and now I’m coming up with intricate backstory on why they look like that as villains #it just makes the most sense to me #phantom is the ghost hero #Danny is the halfa civilian #Fenton is the human villain #Manson and Foley get powers because Sam and Tucker don’t #i know someone is writing a bit for this but I couldn’t help myself #dear author of that fic #i forget what it’s called #please don’t see this and feel pressured to add my stupid headcanon into your fic #it’s kind of an au of an au I guess #idk I’m gonna go eat breakfast #dpxdc