#I would never write shit like that now

[zukosdualdao]

i'm literally insane about the last agni kai and the lightning scene(s). i swear i've rewatched it 10+ times since my last rewatch of the show (which was my first watch in years) and like. azula sees katara come into view from behind. zuko doesn't. he follows azula's gaze and sees katara and is immediately horrified. he doesn't even think or hesitate because he doesn't have time and for once he doesn't have to look back at azula to figure out what she's doing because he knows what she's doing and he won't let it happen. time dwindling into slow motion as a haunting score plays? and zuko literally yelling out "no!" because that lightning absolutely cannot hit katara. as soon as he sees it there's no chance of that ever happening. and then katara watching in horror as the lightning flashes against features in what is probably one of the most hauntingly beautiful animated moments of the show? zuko hitting the ground still convulsing with lightning and katara crying out "zuko!" and immediately trying to run to him before azula attacks again? and the next scene we cut back to with them, zuko is groaning weakly and trying to lift himself up, and we see katara literally gasp in surprise as she realizes he's still alive (i'm sobbing because i do quite literally think she thought he was dead) and immediately tries to run to him again, nevermind that she knows azula is still there, and the hand katara uses for healing is already doused in water as she reaches for him. but then azula starts attacking again. and zuko, despite literally being in so much pain that he can't stand and can barely even move at all without whimpering, still tries to reach for the spot where he can see azula attacking katara. katara is forced to hide from azula's attacks. and as azula is mocking "zuzu, you don't look so good" down to zuko, the perspective shot is such that you can SEE that katara is also looking at where he lies prone in the distance, surrounded by flame (probably wondering how much time they have before it really is too late) before looking back up at azula and realizing she needs to defeat her as quickly and handily as possible so katara can get to zuko. obviously katara would have done this anyway (the whole reason they were THERE was to halt the continued cycle of the imperialist regime of the fire nation), but the scene is specifically framed as katara trying to figure out how to stop azula so the obstacle to her getting to zuko is no longer in the way. katara's defeat of azula was epic and deserves its own post. but then after making sure azula is securely chained, she runs to zuko, looks at him with such immense sadness and horror and fear as she hears him in so much pain, tenderly turns him over so she can get a good look at the wound. and she cups his head? briefly but so gently? so that he won't hit it as she turns him over? and when she tries to heal him you can tell she is so genuinely unsure if it will even work, and so relieved that she starts crying tears of joy when she sees it has (at least enough to keep him alive and somewhat lessen his pain.) they thank each other (and you can tell it's still really hard for zuko to talk and his eyes are barely open but he thanks her anyways i'm.) and she thanks him back and!!! when he starts to try to sit up she makes a little surprised face and then immediately helps him to do so (and puts a tender hand to his chest while she does!!!) and obviously that last shot of them standing together is also one of emotional support, but katara's hand on his back is also partly because i still think (and certainly katara still thinks) trying to walk/stand on his own would be a bad idea, so it's definitely not happening.

#y'all. let me tell you right now. there was a way to write and animate this scene that didn't play on a dozen romantically coded tropes #and this. uh. wasn't that! #zutara #i know this is basically just reciting what happened ( i almost included the actual way katara defeats azula but that wasn't the point of t #is particular post and also would have made it even longer.) #but #there is nothing about this sequence of events that does not make me feel like i am on drugs. #also you Know zuko immediately after this was like: alright well i guess i've got shit to do! then promptly falls unconscious again. tbh #the joke is on him if he thinks katara is letting him out of sight for a While #atla #zuko #katara #this isn't even particularly analytical i'm just gushing #i'm not joking i will never be over it. #the last agni kai #sozin's comet

[oceanwithouthermoon]

ive come to realise that i dont actually hate kubokai, i just hate the way people write them

#sorry i read like two cute in character kubokai fics and im enjoying it now #theyre cute and im a closeted shun kinnie so. obviously i will ship him with my crush from the show. #i just really really REALLY hate the super cliche seme uke dynamic people usually give them #those people have NEVER watched the show.. my boy shun is NOT like that #its sooo stereotypical and they obviously give shun the role of 'the girl' in the relationship which is. um. ew #'shun is so fragile and innocent and uwu and he needs big strong aren around at all times to coddle him' #'and aren has a soft spot for shun and shun only and only shun can stop him from being totally murderous and dumb' #do yall know that one scene from the kissing booth #where elle is like 'NOAH! LOOK AT ME! THIS ISNT YOU! LOOK AT ME' when hes about to beat the shit outta his brother #thats how kubokai gets written usually #'aren pwease nevew fight again🥺pwease? fow me?' #me reading anything kaido says in most fics: HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT #sorry #people can write whatever they want its just. so ooc. #canon them is soooo bromance core #im sorry idk why im posting negative shit again when i like JUST said i wasnt going to do this anymore LMAO #not a callout post about anyone on here obvi- actually reading more recent fics from people on here is whats gotten me more into them #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #kuboyasu aren #kaido shun #kubokai #meows post

[cluescorner]

I gave myself a writing challenge and I am fascinated by it

So basically I put the robins in a randomizer to give them a new order/role (because I just...kinda wanted to see what would happen + I like role-reversal AUs) and got results that are giving me a fucking brain blast.

Stephanie, the first sidekick who defines the role

Tim, the sidekick who dies and comes back wrong

Dick, the sidekick who saves Batman from himself

Damian, the sidekick who was never supposed to be a sidekick but would go on to prove everyone wrong

Jason, the youngest sidekick who is still the Kid Wonder

...So this is fucking wild. I've got some ideas and several of these fit perfectly (Dick's role is pretty similar to his one in canon), but some of these are fucking INCREDIBLE to explore (Steph being the first Robin is something I never even considered but tbh I kinda love it).

I probably won't write a fic or anything because tbh I don't like publishing my writing that much, but I might expand this into a full AU and post about it. I might randomize other stuff too (ie, stuff that I cannot change vs stuff that I cannot keep the same) but this fucking rules as a starting point.

#uhhh what am I calling this?? #randomizedrobinsau #stephanie brown #oh my god I am so excited to figure out how tf to write this. #because she's my favorite of these characters and having HER be the first sidekick + the one who has a mentor/older sister relationship #with the others?? kickass. though I'll probably keep her and Tim's relationship as 'dating-then-exes' because I think it's funny #and then SHE can be the Robin who Tim got fixated on + figured out her identity?? holy fuck and then the angst of Tim later dying #Tim Drake #tbh I kinda wish he'd gotten a different position because 'sidekick who dies' Tim has kinda been done a lot with the standard #reverse robin aus. But it'll still be fun to write. Definitely going the Joker Junior route with this because Batman Beyond kicks ass #Dick Grayson #He'll honestly probably be the easiest. Like...his role has not changed much outside of being younger/not the one who defines this #But I still think it'll be good to see how well I know Dick beyond his eldest brother thing (which is my best way of relating to him) #Damian al ghul #damian wayne #oh this is gonna kick ass #Bruce does not want his son to be a sidekick but Damian just kinda forces his way into that role #and everybody doubts him because of his history with the league but he later proves himself more than capable #to the point that he can set out mostly on his own and still thrive #Jason Todd #Jason being the baby of the family is also something I have never thought about but holy shit it could kick ass #I really hope that I don't roll 'Jason must die' or 'Robin 5 must die' on the randomizer. I just kinda want Jason to live this time #But unfortunately I double-screwed him because he's on the 'must happen' wheel twice now. I did not think these prompts through #TBH I am so happy that none of them rolled their OG roles. because that would have been so fucking boring

[imperiuswrecked]

So I just found out that Jason Aaron (aka the worst Namor writer in the long 80+ years history of the character) is writing Namor.

I'm doing fine (lying).

#namor #WHY ME. #WHY MUST THAT TRASH WRITER BE INFLICTED UPON ME #its an understatement to say that he's the worst writer bc if there was something worse to call him then thats what i would be saying #like in 80 + years namor's had some bad writing but never a writer like aaron who purposefully shits all over the character #lmao #lmao. #he didnt even know the MOST basic lore #he cant even open wiki for 5 seconds #he couldnt write a complicated character to save his life #spent years watching him tear down namor in stupid fucking avengers #but now he gets CREATIVE CONTROL OVER NAMOR AND ATLANTIS #marvel hates namor and this is proof #I've seen creators state online how they tried to get a pitch in for years #ive seen them say they would love to write namor #writers who actually KNOW the character #but nooooooo #we get #jason. fucking. aaron. #first marvel doesnt even give namor any spotlight after he was massively popular in BPWF and now they are putting him in the hands of a hac #I will be complaining #loudly #for a long time about this #jason aaron hate train

[introspectivememories]

if you're writing a charles fic, it must have some aspect of boyking. he must lean a little on the childgod side. he has to be revered a little bit, adored even. if people aren't talking about him like they wouldn't wash his feet and adorn it with perfume like mary magdalene washed and adorned jesus' feet, you're doing it wrong.

#LOOK AT HIM #nearly every image of charles has some aspect of religious imagery to it #that one image of the spanish gp 2021 where he has his hands in front of him and he's looking up at the sky.... madonna in prayer #fuckin look at the entire country of italy. do i even have to say anything? #look at the way ferrari loves him. the way they hold him. press kisses onto his helmet. comfort him. reassure him. #look at vanzini naming him 'il predestinato' all the way back in 2012!! maranello's sun/son!!!! #everyone's always like 'oh stockholm syndrome! stockholm syndrome!' babe he's never leaving them. #he's choosing this!!! he loves this!!!! he's in this scuderia ferrari shit for life like the rest of us!!!! #but he returns it all!!! #look at him saying 'if ferrari is a cage then i would like to be kept in that cage my whole life'!!! #'why stay with ferrari?' / "i have always been a tifosi. i have always loved her. that is reason enough.' #even the most recent contract renewal where he said and i quote: #now my own dream remains. a dream that writes itself in red. tifosi the dream continues. #and like red?? like blood? like the blood that dripped down jesus' temples when they place the crown of thorns on his head? #red like the suit? like the car? like the boyking they have made you out to be? the childgod you have become? #when he won in monza i think it was too late for us. i think it rewrote something in us. i think he ascended that day. #the closest the narrative has come to consuming him. when he wins again in monza (and he will win in monza again) it will change us again #i have to stop before it gets me too. who said all that? i need to go lay down. #charles leclerc #cl16 #scuderia ferrari #f1 #introspective.txt #and obviously you can write you fics however the hell you want. this is just how i like mine.

[iknowwhereyousnoozeatnight]

if ur still doing requests pls rem if not das all g

she’s chrysanthemum-coded to me <3

close-ups ig

#ask #death note #rem #very messy i apologize #was extra messy here because i was playing with a new brush and by that i mean a default brush that i've never touched before #i actually quite like it very fun i typically like brushes that are 100% or close to 100% opaque but this was fun i like how it layered #i think i'm gonna finalize my idea and perhaps render something fully for once because i feel up to it if flowers are involved #but i promise nothing #drew these left to right btw. there were also like 2 more but they were small and i gave up on them so wjatever #i like the last one the best i think i needed a bit to figure out how i wanted the petals to lay and i like that one the best #the silhouette feels good i like the shape the back i did start trying smth asymmetrical but rem is very symmetrical and i find the symmetr #paired with the wings feels very regal and powerful and almost cape-like as a silhouette which i am a fan of #if i did finish something i might add misa in which case i need to think of what flower she most resembles roses are too easy i need smth #else but i will decide that later bc i am writing this very late at night and now i'm gonna queue it up for tomorrow bc i am going somewher #so goodbye goodnight good day idk what time it is for you. so #WAIT I SHOULD DO RYUK TOO WAIT WAIT soon. soon. he will be a bug yes yessss wait wait if he's a bug i want misa to be butterfly themed #like maybe a beetle of some kind? no no no wasp? ant? i'll think abt it #light would prob be some sort of poisonous plant? idk if u have thoughts idk tell me i'm getting into this bc i'm deprived of springtime at #and it is making me silly :3 teehee anyway i will Think about this and get back to it soon enough #gooddbye bye bye sayonara you weeaboo shits idk. bye

[hella1975]

ive just rediscovered an old wip of mine and im having so much fun right now. like i havent opened the document since early 2020 and genuinely forgot it existed yet there's 90k words and so much lore and elements of basic concepts that made it to my present writing in far cooler and more complex ways and the writing isn't great but there's potential to it and idk. it's been a while since i wrote something privately and while i hugely prefer the way i do it now where i actually have a community with it and dont hole myself away and act like it's a huge shame thing, there's still something hugely reasuring about knowing this is something ive always done and that actually i was always drawn to it and had potential and that's something to remember for when my writing block gets bad or i convince myself Everything Ive Ever Done Is Awful

#like this story is one where if i tackled it with my writing abilities now it would genuinely be really good #that's how sound the basic premise is. and i have SO many wips like that with tens of thousands of words to them #and i was doing this for ZERO reward ZERO attention i wouldnt tell a SOUL not even my family #i truly just have always loved and NEEDED to write. that is such a cool thing to be able to say #anyway yeah this wip lowkey fucks. like there's lots of aspects to it that are cringe and telling of the fact i was writing it at age 16 #but the fact i came up with something so fleshed out at SIXTEEN??? insane #and this isnt even one of my big older wips. i have three that immediately come to mind that were sooo much bigger than this #like on the shorter end being 100k words and larger end easily being near 300k words #and they were JUST FOR ME like i didnt even know what ao3 WAS and i never spoke to anyone about my writing #and they WERENT FANDOM BASED. i was just casually coming up with super original detailed and COMEPLLING worlds #and characters and plots with complex twists and tropes and i was just doing it for shits #that's so fucking cool. did you ever think you'd see the day i gave past hella a pat on the back bc i didn't

[computerboyboobs]

umm. cringe little fic concept in comic form below the cut

#my pictures #i can post anything i want....!!!! #anyways id be writing this right now if i actually. knew how to write well #and also like yes i know realistically theyd be beating the everloving shit out of eachother at a moments notice and would never do this . #leave me alone i like smacking them together like barbies

[raiiny-bay]

they've come a long way

#i've been meaning to remake the original monster boyz post for sooo long #when i first made that edit they were essentially just dhes & kel in costume #like. i honestly didn't want to write any lore for the mbz for a long time #but the lore practically wrote itself #they sort of just naturally evolved into who they are now #& now that i have lore for them i have so many edits & story stuff i want to do with them that i literally cannot keep up #i have a literal list of shit i wanna make & do w them & i just do not have the time to do any of it!! #it's gonna take me all of next year to get through this list!! #they're like. genuinely my favorite lil guys #i'm glad i joined simblr bc i never would have made them otherwise #i never had any interest in apocalypse stories or even horror for that matter #i mean. i like horror movies but as far as writing goes i was always more of a slice of life kinda person #y'all have opened my eyes to the horrors #(in a good way) #n e way. i do plan on making a few lore/story related posts at some point #i have NOT forgotten about the boys' origin stories. i just don't have tiiiiime #rainyrambles

[synonymroll648]

sokeefitz au where keefe is a magician, fitz is his assistant (who also learned how to sword swallow just to occasionally upstage keefe at his show's because he's petty but doesn't know how to pull a quarter from someone's ear), and sophie is marella's newest friend that's getting dragged to one of keefe's magic shows and holy wow ok marella was not kidding about the magician and his assistant being hot. cue keefe pulling roses out of his sleeve for sophie midshow because he knows a cutie when he sees one (after getting a subtle okay from fitz, who is his boyfriend but most people only know about the childhood friends part). and fitz getting to know her after the curtains close and asking her if she wants to hang out sometime. and keefe crashing that meetup when it happens halfway through because he can't help himself and knows fitz won't mind.

and them becoming friends that hang out a lot outside of shows, and sophie being keefe's most reliable regular. that DEFINITELY aren't flirting, marella, c'mon, fitz leaving out scarves for her to steal at their apartment she now frequents more than her own and learning her favorite treats to bake for her and keefe constantly throwing his arm around her and complimenting her w/ ten million winks is strictly platonic in this context

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc fic idea #sokeefitz #sophie foster #keefe sencen #fitz vacker #it has been too long since i have posted about these fuckers considering that the brainrot never stops #also. it would be REALLY funny if sophie was a scientist. that can debunk some of keefe's harder tricks just by paying attention #actually. if anyone writes this. make her specialize in physics. so she knows a bunch of crazy shit from her classes that makes keefe go :O #additionally. for extra self indulgence on my part. keefe being genderfluid and occasionally performing a trick where he's super masc on #stage and then he's obscured for like .2 seconds and then WHABAM he is now a she and very femme would be fantastic #cis keefe works but also. transfem keefe owns my heart. transmasc keefe is great too because i can go 'just like me fr' #but also. keefe gives more transfem vibes in canon. from what i remember from canon #i could probably dream up more scenes for this au but. i just thought it would be cute #and wanted to share

[waitineedaname]

thought I should collect my vague fma/mp100 thoughts here to make it easier to have them all in one place !

basic plot/character stuff

ed and al are both talented young psychics who got their powers when they were pretty young. ed got his powers around the time their dad (a CRAZY powerful psychic) left, and al got his shortly after their mom died :(

they thought they could use their powers to bring their mom back as a spirit, but it went. very bad. instead, an evil spirit took advantage of them and started fucking Eating Their Life Forces. al freaked out and astral projected out of panic, but his entire body was consumed so now he's. stuck like that. ed managed to exorcise the spirit, but not until after his arm and leg are devoured too

their motivation is to get rid of evil spirits that take advantage of people and hurt them like this, which is what takes them to roy mustang's door

roy mustang is a fake psychic pretending to have pyrokinesis (he just has a flamethrower behind his desk) because I think that's funny. he's running an exorcism business like spirits and such, except he has a larger crew -- mostly his friends he can call up to do odd jobs for him, like fixing the leaky pipes that make noises that make people think their house is haunted or whatever. he's also the only exorcism business that's willing to hire a teenager, so that's how the elrics end up working for him

in addition to mustang's crew of non-psychics, he also has hughes, who is tragically a ghost. there is definitely some tragic back story here that I'm still working on hashing out, but they've kind of come to terms about it now. he still haunts his family, who know he's there, and he agrees to help out mustang with Actual Spirit Issues when the elrics are unavailable

the elrics' quest to deal with manipulative evil spirits leads them to encounter the sins, who are all very powerful evil spirits. one of the first ones they deal with is greed, who they mostly exorcise, but he manages to just barely survive, dimple style. he's looking for ways to bring himself back up to full power

enter: ling yao, recently awakened psychic who is also looking for ways to become more powerful. he keeps over-exerting his psychic powers and exhausting himself, which is how the elrics come across him mostly unconscious. he's very excited to meet another esper, but he makes the mistake of asking why al doesn't possess ed, since he knows that can enhance someone's psychic powers. the elrics are both Very Sensitive about that kind of topic and tell him to fuck Right Off

bad idea, because then he goes and finds a spirit of his own. both he and greed approach their mutually beneficial consensual possession situation for self-serving reasons. both of them look at each other and think "yeah I can definitely manipulate this guy into making me more powerful" [fast forward a couple months to when they've become Extremely attached to each other] oopsies

lan fan is a telepath. ling did not know this, so he tried to act soooo normal about being possessed around her. that didn't work for long, jackass! she got so fucking angry with him when she heard a literal devil on his shoulder, and even though ling stopped her from destroying greed, that evil spirit is on THIN ICE.

scar's family was killed in a psychic terrorist incident (think kimblee if he was part of claw). he's one of those really late bloomer espers -- it wasn't until this traumatic event that his psychic powers awoke, and he hates them because of the link to the event. now he's on his vengeance based quest, going after psychics that abuse their powers

things I'm still working out the details for

mustang was involved in some high profile fuck-up. kind of like separation arc reigen except uhhh people Died. hughes was likely one of those people. no one has enough proof to outright prove he did it, but he is definitely linked to the event, especially because he was a pretty public psychic figure at the time. in reality, it was the fault of the sins, but it's harder to find evidence when it was evil spirits doing it

olivier + the rest of briggs are an anti-psychic terrorism government agency (kinda like joseph) and initially scar is one of their targets, but they end up recruiting him bc they have a common goal

eventually scar starts working at spirits and such (olivier's assignment so he can keep an eye on mustang) but he fucking hates it. oh my god I cannot emphasize how much he hates it. imagine reigen serizawa and mob at spirits and such except none of them can stand each other. that's mustang, scar, and ed having to work together.

mei is also a psychic! she kind of latches onto both scar and alphonse (separately) because she needs some help killing someone. they have very different reactions to this.

the someone she's trying to kill is father, a super powerful psychic who's been orchestrating much of the psychic terrorism, as well as directing the sins. he's like if toichiro had a specialty for spirit wrangling like matsuo

miscellaneous au details

ed and al's auras (and al's spirit form) are mostly gold, ed's leaning more coppery and al's more of a green-gold. ed's kind of has the look of fire crackling around him. ling's aura is a blend of red and purple and has a kind of watercolor/bruise look. it's more vibrant and has more purple when greed is possessing him. mei's is mostly pink with some red.

mob psycho spirits range from completely abstract to mostly humanoid and frequently have multiple forms in between. hughes looks mostly humanoid most of the time, but can go simplified and silly when gushing about his family. al has a more powerful form that looks like the full suit of armor but he doesn't like using it very often, so most of the time he's a long blob that's just kind of armor shaped (like when the armor is simplified for silly moments). greed at full power looked like the ultimate shield, after being weakened he looks more like a dimple-like blob that resembles the face in ling's mindscape. when possessing ling and both of them are using their powers, ling gets lines on his face like on the ultimate shield (like dimple's cheek spots!)

other spirits: pride looks how you'd expect. horrible shadow spirit. envy bodysnatches a lot. wrath has been possessing a politician for Literal Decades. it's no good. I'm not sure about the other sins

people's feelings on possession range from the elrics (Fuck No), to hughes and mustang (if necessary to get a job done), to greedling (they like it like this actually)

the rockbells aren't psychics but they live kinda adjacent to the psychic world bc theyre family friends with the elrics + hohenheim, so they know more than most about psychic powers

#this ended up SO LONG. WHOOPSIE. #fma #fma mob psycho au #this is now my masterpost for this au #if more details get worked out then I'll edit it #but I thought it would be easier to have a post with all of it than having it scattered across dms and posts #speaking of dms tho. for me creating aus is a very collaborative process #so I would LOVE to hear input and ideas and stuff to mold this into the best it can be #especially since I have my favoritism and my blindspots #which means I've thought a lot about the elrics and greedling and scar #but less about like. the mustang gang #I've tried multiple times to write stuff for this and it's never quite come out like I want #bc I hold my aus to too high of a standard I think #I'm like ''my writing must be COHESIVE and tell a STORY that MAKES SENSE'' #which then keeps me from writing things just for shits and giggles when it's for a big au like this #alas. I need to work on that.

[cookinguptales]

I will say, though, people used to be way meaner about fic online when I was a kid. Readers can still be shitty, don't get me wrong, but it was the wild fucking west when I was young and new to fandom.

Sporking communities (communities dedicated to going through fic line-by-line to make fun of it to an audience), homophobic death threats, "constructive criticism" that was really just designed to hurt young writers' feelings... Like this was all considered not just acceptable but fun and fairly normalized. You were considered "butthurt" if this stuff really affected you.

But damn, it was so mean. Like so unnecessarily mean. People were practically hunting fan writers for sport just because they wrote fic/meta/roleplays/etc. that they didn't enjoy. I cannot overemphasize that making fun of writers was considered a viable fandom path at a certain point. Some people got very big followings for sporkings, takedowns, particularly creative flames, etc.

What I'm telling you is that making fun of others' writing was considered a kind of fanwork in and of itself.

Like... I remember writing something online when I was about fourteen and -- I don't even remember what it was, being honest with you. It probably wasn't very good, given my age. But I do remember that someone just replied to it with a link for a website "how to write" and nothing else, and it hurt my feelings so badly that I didn't even want to keep going. That was considered concrit back then, even though it was really just a thinly veiled insult. Pretty sure whoever wrote that comment thought it was hilarious, and others would have agreed with them. I definitely would've been mocked if I'd complained.

And... that was just what you had to put up with if you posted your writing publicly. Some of those old warnings like "flames will be used to make s'mores!" come off as kind of cringe these days, but it really was a coping mechanism that you had to develop if you wanted to get through it at all. It was saying "your words won't hurt me, so don't bother."

Like... I like to believe that I'm a pretty good writer these days, and I can guarantee that not one of those assholes who made fun of me or mocked my work or talked shit about my ideas actually helped to make me what I am today. It was the people who encouraged me to play with a lot of different ideas and forms of writing who really helped me grow. Nothing worked better than just writing and writing and writing without fear that I would be punished for doing so.

So even if you're a garbage person who likes to hurt people because it makes you feel big and strong and important, think about all this pragmatically. Be totally fucking selfish for a minute. Think about all of the good writing you will never, ever get to read if you destroy the writer's self-esteem when they're still learning. Think about all the people who will never grow. All the beautiful flowers that are being nipped in the bud every day by assholes like you.

And even if someone never gets good, even if they just splash around in stupid ideas and awful prose and incoherent characterization... so fucking what? No one owes you beauty. Sometimes the beauty is just in having fun with what you're doing, and sometimes that's enough.

I am actually extremely relieved that fandom isn't quite as cruel as it was when I was a kid, but I won't pretend that things are perfect now. People still have this weird entitlement to them, like other people in fandom only exist to create things that they enjoy. Like other people only have worth, only matter, if their presence gives you exactly what you want when you want it.

You don't have to like everything that other people make! You don't even have to like them. But come on, now. Let people have fun. And don't act like other people's fun is only valid if it's of use to you.

#vent post #also jesus CHRIST was fandom homophobic back then #you could only post slash on certain sites and even there you'd often get hate mail #I never got sporked to my knowledge thank god #that would have DEVASTATED me as a teenager #but boy were people shitty to me on a now-defunct (thank god) anon meme a little later #like literally it devolved from people who didn't like my writing to people gossiping about me being CSA'd #because '00s fandom was fuckin brutal #and I do not miss it #see also: why I abandoned my old username many years ago lmao #anyway I actually blocked someone only a few years ago for sharing links to sporking communities in the comments of my tumblr posts #after I specifically said I wouldn't name any because I thought they were shitty #don't let the door hit you on the way out asshole #so I guess some people are still into that shit

[gentlethorns]

lol i got decisions back from all four of my grad school apps and none of them were acceptances. i got waitlisted by one and outright denied by the other three. fuck man

#she bork #idk i have mixed feelings bc on one hand after moving once already this year i'm not super keen on moving again like four months from now #and across state lines to boot. i've never REALLY moved like w furniture and i have exponentially more shit to move now than i did as a #freshly graduated teenager and it turned out to be so much more stressful and work intensive than i anticipated. trying to move in one #weekend fucking sucked. on the other hand i do still want to go to grad school and i would never forgive myself if i let one (very small) #failed round of apps derail my plan to get my masters. idk it just sucks bc now it's like on hold bc i clearly need to beef up and #strengthen my portfolio but i hardly ever write anymore bc like who the fuck has the time. so i actually have to get disciplined w writing #more as well as sending out submissions so i can get more publications under my belt. so it's not like i'll automatically just reapply to #more schools next year bc i'm not wasting hundreds of dollars on apps when clearly i need to do some work on my #portfolio. idk it just sucks bc now idk what to do not only if i don't get in but even if i do bc again moving sucks and unless i majorly #downsize before moving again it's gonna be terrible. idk i feel like shit man

[variousqueerthings]

*sighs in post mildly broke containment again* there's nothing wrong with reading willow as a lesbian, this is a piece of fiction, and the post I made took on a jokey tone for a reason and is ultimately more about underlying bi-erasure on tv than anything else kaybye ✌

#im watching btvs #jeepers creepers but btvs is bringing out the *taking it all very seriously in a very morally high-and-mighty kind of way* crowd #and i dont mean about shit that matters such as discussing racism or misogyny in fandom #just about whether you agree or dislike someone's read of a situation - move on my friend if you dont agree #i mean i could go on a rant about HOW the show portrayed willow-the-now-lesbian #(and while im at it why i hc buffy-the-apparent-heterosexual as bi too but nobody has disputed that part oddly enough) #but that would be an effort im truly not interested in expending on this day and possibly never and has been written before #im mostly just live-blogging and moving on #if im writing anything fanfic-wise it'll be about kendra and that'll be my full fandom contribution #ok but the ONE thing i'll mention is the fight willow has with tara which is one of the rare Ls for tara #where she basically admits that she's afraid this is a phase because willow has loved men/been with oz #and that's just an interesting fight from a meta perspective because the idea that bi women have to *choose a side* #and are consistently questioned and doubted by their lesbian partners #is a core element of biphobia within a gay relationship that many people can attest to #hell it's a big part of bisexual rep that is conscious of itself that at some point there's a plotline where the person is questioned #about their true loyalties and asked to take a side #btvs ofc is NOT conscious of this underlying tension and in fact i would argue is agreeing with tara that this is what needs to happen #for several other reasons as well #but literally people have WRITTEN about this im not saying anything bold and controversial here AND it doesnt take away #from lesbian willow reads to acknowledge the flawed approach of the show to her sexuality like come on #willow rosenberg

[mermaidsirennikita]

One reason why I think Mila Finelli's mafia books do work for me better than most other (Italian--I did really love Kresley's series) mafia romance novels I've read is that the characters do feel DISTINCT and so do the relationship dynamics.

In a lot of these somewhat darker, more erotic reads, you do get the sense that any of the characters could be switched out for one another. The heroes are always the same types of alphas, the heroines are always the same types of a) virgins or b) defiant rebels who may also still be virgins, and what really sets the books apart are a few bananas scenes here and there, and some distinct sex scenes.

And while I definitely think there are distinct sexual dynamics and kinks at play with each couple (Fausto/Frankie are obviously daddy kink-central, Enzo and Gia are.... generalized freaks with some heavier BDSM by way of CNC vibes, Giulio and Alessio also have some D/s vibes but with a more competitive edge and are very into each other's violence, and Giacomo/Emma are obviously a breeding kink/softer touch vibe) they're also just super different people.

I guess the closest couples would be Fausto and Frankie and Enzo and Gia, but even then... Fausto is a dick, but he's more rational, more doting (see: daddy), and though Frankie is absolutely defiant and strong, I actually think that though she and Fausto have more of a traditional partnership in terms of gender than Enzo and Gia (which also could be because Frankie wants a billion kids and yes she has her MBA but she's very much a wife and mom first, whereas Gia is more about her career, which keeps them from being too similar). Enzo and Gia are more into the defined D/s shit sexually, but you get the sense that she has more control in the relationship and that, at the end of the day, he is very much... her bitch. Enzo and Gia have a very similar age gap to Fausto and Frankie, but Fausto and Frankie have more of a care-focused DD/lg relationship, whereas Enzo and Gia thrive on the friction of her giving as good as she gets.

And Alessio and Giulio, aside from the obvious of being the only queer relationship in the series, are very much coded as D/s as well... But not as inflexibly as the previous two couples. Aside from them switching it up in the bedroom a little, there's also a lot of space for Alessio to take care of Giulio. Like, Giulio kinda doesn't know shit about what he's doing lol, whereas Alessio is hypercompetent (which also makes sense, as Fausto for sure spoiled Giulio and Alessio has been in essentially a different class his entire life). So while Giulio is more sexually dominant, Alessio is really the stronger, steadier, and more threatening partner otherwise. And again, they both really get off on watching each other do what they do best, which is: crime.

I do think Giacomo and Emma have the softest relationship in the series--but it's not so much because she's this kind of babe in the woods virgin (and I will say, I did love that Frankie and Gia were NOT lol) but because Giacomo is just a much more tender guy. Like, yes, Fausto and Enzo both also had loved ones, but I think that because they'd both been running their shit longer than Giacomo had before he met Emma, they had these very set roles. Fausto and Enzo come off as more brutal, and honestly more crazy (like, Enzo is THE CRAZIEST for sure, but Fausto is a fucking nutball). Giacomo seems like a dude who's good at killing people and doing mafia stuff, but it's really like? His day job. It's not his life and it doesn't feel like his culture, even, which makes sense because he was on the fringes of the types of levels Fausto and Enzo have always been in, because his father and brother kept him separate from it. Even Giulio is more connected to that space than Giacomo, because he was groomed to take over for years.

I think it would be very easy to rely on these great sex scenes and wacky plots she writes, but the thing that does make it clear that Mila has the chops (.... and it also makes it clear that she's very experienced, lol, and someone who has had to write series with very individualized characters for professional editors in the past........) is that the characters are very DIFFERENT. Like, Frankie and Gia may both have their partners' balls in their pockets, but you see Frankie do a wheedling kind of little girl pouting thing to get her way with Fausto because she knows he looooves it, whereas Gia is like LISTEN UP ASSHOLE with Enzo (and it makes the relationship the best because nobody else can do that with him, Enzo and Gia are the greatest, thanks for coming to my Ted Talk). Giacomo is willing to let Emma go in a way that Fausto, Enzo, and honestly I would say Giulio too after working out some things, really aren't okay with. He's probably the best guy out of the series, on a moral level, while also being a scary murder man.

(Except for maybe Alessio? Because Alessio is also a scary murder man, but he literally just does it for the cash or to protect Giulio. It's PURE BUSINESS.)

I find the distinctiveness of the characters really cool, especially when I reread the books, and that is probably why I've had a hard time finding a series that really clicks for me in the same way within the sort of Italian mafia genre.

(That, and: so much of the other books center on Italian-American mafia stuff and that shit DOES NOT HAVE THE SAUCE the way Mila's Italy-set books do. Like, be real here, the Italian-American mafia has not been raking in this kind of cash for DECADES.)

#romance novel blogging #anyway my musings on the mafia fuckbooks continue #i really do need to read annika martin's books #bc she's another author i have been pleased by with other books #and similarly to mila did a hard left into mafia novels #but yes #i do think that giacomo being sort of fringe-level with the mobster CEO shenanigans did deprive us of some of the funniest shit in the book #which would be like #enzo and fausto sending each other severed heads and getting on the phone like #'is that-' 'the severed head of your employee? yeah. :)' #or giulio bopping over to be like 'LISTEN UP THE ONLY COKE DEALER IN SPAIN IS ME NOW!!!!' #like i do remember her saying she hadn't originally been planning to write a book for emma #which seemed wild to me at the time #but you can tell this story was conceived of separately from the others #bc there's a pretty clear pipeline from fausto and frankie -> the villain enzo getting a book w gia -> #tying up the arc with fausto's son falling for the guy enzo paid to kill fausto lmao #(the comedy of this series will never top enzo fully forgetting he put a hit on giulio bc of all the bomb sex he was having on his yacht) #anyway that doesn't make mafia virgin a lesser book in any way it just reads as the most oN ITS OWN

[rat-presenting]

Cis people with deadnames are either some of the chillest, coolest people you know or the guy from your old job who did coke with the teenagers on staff to align their chakras and says with a straight face nobody is worthy of his inner thoughts so he never shares them.

#I could write. a book on the shit that guy pulled before management fired him #I’m paraphrasing but you get it. #no hate if that’s your thing but I draw the line at making your coworkers listen to your weird religion just because you’re the director #it got to a point that we would start him on something just to gawk and make fun of him later in the staff rooms #like. “Jesus was a Buddha and also a dream warrior and all the ancient Egyptian gods were real and came to me in my dreams” #“now thrust to align your coochie energies” #I will never try thai chi or whatever that was again #textpost