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panxramic · 14 days

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Missa cubito ohmygod today’s stream was SOOO.

Firstly, I haven’t talked about this but the fact that q!Missa has finally accepted the family home as his home too makes me want to snob. The fact that he calls it HIS home too, after spending so long distancing himself and saying that he doesn’t deserve to live with them? It makes my heart spin. And yes he still has his movements of self doubt but he knows now that this is his home and this is where he will always return to no matter what.

And I adore the little things that Missa notices. Last stream he got so giddy over the barrel in the house with his name on it and got so happy that he was included with the rest of the family even if he didn’t have anything in it. And then once again today gasping and getting happy at seeing the barrel again as if it was the first time all over. Missa loves being loved and he adores the little things the family does to show it. And how does he return the favor? With drawings he can leave behind dedicated to each one of them. Because he loves his family and he will find a way to physically show it even if he can’t be awake when they are.

And ohhh today with the cakes. He struggled so much and he lost so much energy trying to make the birthday cake for Tallulah but he would not give up until he got it done for both of them because his kids deserve it. And can I also point out I don’t think he realized it was also Chayanne’s birthday but he still made him a cake because he wanted to give something to his son and not make him feel left out. And when he was making the drawing for Tallulah he would not stop and he would not let ANYTHING distract him because his daughter deserves the world and she deserves the perfect painting.

Then come the raccoons. He goes and helps them clean because maybe he can earn money for the family and help out more around the house -> something Missa has always struggled with. He always wants to provide for the family the way they have him so he goes along with these raccoons. Then it all goes to shit when Bad logs on and he finds out it was his home they were cleaning. He finds the dead bodies and he gets scared because… who is this man he’s been calling his friend? Why does he have a grave of bodies underneath his home?

Missa runs. He tries to run away from q!Bad but he always finds him. And then it gets revealed that Missa was working with the raccoons and Bad backs away from Missa because how could he betray him. And Missa does try to explain it, he doesn’t know what is going on. He’s lost and confused and no one is answering his questions. q!Bad threatens and leaves q!Missa with the racoons just for the racoons to stab Missa in the back and rob him too.

This is when he asks himself, who can he trust? q!Bad isn’t who he thought he was, and the racoons betrayed him. He has considered q!Bad a friend for a long time because he’s always on when Missa is on and is always there to help (though if you ask me I would argue the opposite). He tried finding a way to justify Bad’s behavior, even the stuff chat brings up until he can’t. So, he goes back home and prepares a letter to Phil.

Because he realizes after everything in his life, after continuously trusting and relying on the wrong people, he concludes he can only trust q!Phil.

Missa never really leaves letters. His thing has always been paintings and small gifts. But for the first time (in what might be a long time) he leaves Phil a letter. Now that he’s accepted this is his home, he sees it’s also a place people can use to hurt him, in this case q!Bad.

Notice how when q!Bad came back and said he was gonna prank q!Phil and left, q!Missa immediately ran in to check on the kids? His priority and his fear will always be losing his family. He has spent so much of his life pushing himself a way from them, he doesn’t want to lose them when they’re so so close.

But as always… Missa runs. He runs away and sleeps somewhere else for tonight.

In his defense, I will say that this time it’s different. He’s running to protect his family. Is it the best option? I don’t think so. Missa always has struggled with feeling like he isn’t enough. And in this case, his families lives could be in danger so he runs away, because it’s his fault and he isn’t enough to protect them.

I will say. Things have changed. Because this time around he warned Phil. These two have had SOOO many instances of miscommunication and not talking to one another and we finally have a moment in which Phil is hearing directly from Missa. Not some other character, not his kids, Missa.

And the last thing Missa said when he went to bed. He wasn’t sleeping on a bed, because the only bed he will ever sleep on is the one in his home. LIKE FUCK. Yes he ran, yes he left to protect his family. But that’s his home. That’s where he will ALWAYS return to for comfort and safety. It isn’t a forever. It’s just for now.

For the first time, Missa is certain he will always have a home to return to.

#sorry if this makes no sense #I love Missa cubito so much #I just had to spit this out #qsmp #marv rants #death family #qsmp missa #qsmp philza #deathduo

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onesidedradiostatic · 1 month

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btw one funny thing about my weird watch order for hazbin is my impression of alastor. so I've mentioned in posts before that the first hazbin episode I watched was episode 4 out of curiosity due to twitter discourse. I had NOT watched the pilot at this point. only thing I'd seen of alastor prior was a twitter moot posting alastor's last verse in stayed gone and only that. so imagine my surprise when I found out that this guy, with the ominous last verse in stayed gone complete with a demon transformation, and the clearly sinister cameo in husk's flashback in episode 4, WAS ONE OF THE PROTAGONISTS?????????????

#osrs.txt #like I had to metaphorically spit out my drink #I was so convinced he was just one of the villains #like. antagonist villains #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #alastor hazbin #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel

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solarpunkani · 11 months

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Psst, hey.

Hey you.

Come closer.

Listen to what I'm about to say good and well, alright?

#out of queue #ani rambles #anti ai #anti ai art #solarpunk #solarpunk aesthetic #does this have the official backing of the other 2 event hosts? no i just made this meme on a whim #but also if you try submitting AI art and we find out? or worse if I can flat-out TELL its AI? I'm blocking your ass #one of the best artists I've ever had the pleasure of knowing won't touch the Solarpunk community with a 10 foot pole because of all the #goddamn AI art infiltrating this space. constantly. like even when I'm trying to be on the lookout for it I somehow reblog it anyways #even when I block the tags too!!!! this is a PROBLEM #you want more artists taking part in this community spreading the vision visualizing the future?#STOP REBLOGGING AI BULLSHIT AND CHASING THEM AWAY THEN #how are artists supposed to feel accepted and appreciated and loved by this community when every other piece under the tag is some fuckin #midjourney bs made my scrubbing the internet and spitting out a mishmash of other artists' works and ideas?#i have said it before I will say it again #i would rather see a messy pen scribble on the back of a coffee stained napkin with stickfigures than see some smooth smudgy AI BS again #this applies to AI writing too if I catch an INKLING that your short story even STARTED with some bs chatgpt ramblings you're blocked

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cpunkhobie · 11 months

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This is straight up a non-issue, me complaining abt someone else complaining abt right-wingers calling something "woke," but imma go-off minorly abt this

I haven't seen the movie but after seeing Many Asian-American people talking about how it's clearly a metaphor for Asian immigrant families and finding your way in the world as an immigrant, the complete neglect of that to flatten it into a "heterosexual love story" really pisses me off as an mixed asian person. The right-wing isn't just pissed off at queer people, and I say this as a queer person, but every defiance from the hetero-binary white norm. Asians in general and ESPECIALLY Asian Americans are often left out and barred from discussions of racial and cultural oppression. And the fact that our discrimination at the hand of right-wingers is straight up being ignored by people in such a casual and small way really just stings.

A huge part of Asian American discrimination is "a thousand papercuts" and this just feels like another one. Yes, a movie that's a metaphor for being an Asian immigrant, and now that I think abt it being a mixed race couple in the US is "woke." Mixed race couples and the unique discrimination and micro-aggressions they face is still something that is largely ignored in liberal talking circles, at least the ones I'm in, and still something HUGELY looked down upon by the right wing. Intersectionality is such a scary concept for someone people, including people on the left, and this just feels like a perfect example of that.

Again, haven't seen the movie. My understanding of its themes is purely based on what I've heard from other people, but as a wasian, mixed-race queer person from an immigrant family, you do not get to use one part of my identity to devalue another. It doesn't work like that. Include Asian people in the discussion, and include mixed race relationships and people, and immigrants in the discussion. Don't just ignore us cause our issues are hard for you to understand.

#jonah with a megaphone #at the end of the day this rlly just feels like a spit in the face to intersectionality . idfk man it's like 1am #mixed kid rage #I might go more in depth abt this once I like. actually watch the movie but I don't see that happening anytime soon so take this with a #grain of salt.#im chill btw im not gonna let this get to me too bad needa go to bed anyways #ik I said id delete Twitter but the conceptart queue ran out so I had to redownload it

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starry-bi-sky · 20 days

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I am absolutely loving your Danyal Al Ghul au. While I have a soft spot for the whole plotline of Danny becoming his canon personality almost right after breaking away from the LOA all because of Jazz, I'm just as much for your take in which he goes through the same character development as Damian.

Now I'm curious. You already tackled his relationship with Dani, will you eventually take a stab at when he, Sam, and Tucker meet Gregor? Given that it's one of my hated episodes as I couldn't stand Sam's infuriatingly hypocritical attitude to Danny's suspicions of him, I'd kill to see your spin on it.

Aw, thank you! Danyal Al Ghul aus are what got me into DPDC first, so I have a major soft spot for them. That being said, uh, its exactly that soft spot that causes me to have Many Opinions about the trope you just mentioned. Like the trope is all fine and dandy, i don't blindly hate it, my main issue with it is that most aus i've seen treat his backstory as an ex-assassin more like a pretty cosmetic accessory rather than something that actually should have had an impact on him. Especially if he remembers being in the league.

Like i cannot stress enough the fact that being in an ecofascist assassin cult (regardless of his standing in it) should've left him, in some way or another, screwed up morally and psychologically because that's just how development works. Nature vs. Nurture is like a game of tug-o-war that never ends, where they are constantly fighting against each other and one side usually has the upper hand or greater influence. Children model the behaviors of the adults around them (ex: bobo the clown doll experiment), and what impacts them in childhood can stick with them permanently.

Like how my psychology professor put it: a baby's brain is like wet cement; if you slap your hand on it, it leaves an imprint, and the cement dries that way. The same rings true for small children.

I could go on, but I frankly have so many thoughts on that alone that I would end up completely derailing from the second half of your ask, and I don't want to be more critical than I already have. Especially since you just mentioned you have a soft spot for the trope.

[Okay, hold onto your hats because this is long. Naturally lmao.]

Gregor! Man, I'll admit I last watched the show back in middle school on a dodgy illegal website (it had surprisingly good audio and visual graphics, and full episodes. But really annoying porn ads.) but I only made it to like season 1 before my hyperfixation faded and I lost interest. So I never actually saw the Gregor episode.

But... it is relatively easy to find free websites that stream Danny Phantom :), so finding the episode took me like. Thirty seconds. Plus the Tv.Tropes recap page because my damn earbuds just died and im out in public as of rn.

I'm not sure if I'll write something for the gregor episode like I did with Dani, since Dani's a bit of a special case in that she's a clone and tends to be a reoccurring presence in DPDC, and I thought the new dynamic with Danyal would be interesting.

Plus, I'm not a big amethyst ocean shipper for the pure reason of I'm just not all that interested in it; its kinda bland to me. I'll admit I've entertained the thought in this au due to the whole balcony scene i wrote, but I would've entertained the thought anyways if it was Tucker in that position instead. Big multishipper, me.

But, if I had to make it official? Danyal is not interested romantically in Sam when the Gregor episode happens, regardless of his relationship with Valerie. Who, speaking of I'm trying to think about how that would go, and I'm torn between including him almost-dating Valerie or not.

Because on one hand it helps point out Sam's hypocrisy (and i love her but i am always happy to point out her flaws and address them in au) in this episode in terms of Danny spying on them, but on the other hand I'll want to include a lot of set up in order to make Gray Ghost work in this au and wow will that take a while.

Especially with the Flirting with Disaster episode because it happens due to Technus' meddling, and Danny is, well, the son of the Batman? A trained assassin? An ex-assassin nonetheless, but still an assassin? A prodigy child in this au? He might not have needed to use most of his skills in the last few years, but like... there's just a bunch of 'what if' and 'well technically...' and 'would he? he could, but would he?' things that is getting in the way of my thought process and making my head spin.

Mmm. Okay. Flirting with Disaster occurs relatively the same as canon with a few exceptions; like Danyal noticing the strange coincidences, and he might take the idea into proper consideration because Sam has a point it is strange, especially out of nowhere.

However,,, he really enjoys Valerie's company, and he does really like her. He's been adjusting to civilian life for the last four years and while he's made a lot of progress, he's still. an ex-assassin child living like a wolf amongst sheep. This is normal, typical teenager stuff, and usually his friends like to encourage him doing normal teenager stuff.

So he's stubbornly holding out on the thought that this is normal, that ghost stuff isn't interfering here. He's a little hurt that his friends are discouraging this, he's not bothered by the fact that Valerie is a ghost hunter and he a ghost -- his mother is an assassin, and his father is Batman, and they still had a relationship. (Granted, he's not gonna tell them that)

If anything, being diametrically opposed to each other but still being in love is part of the family! Granted, usually both parties are aware of said opposition to each other, but he'll make a special exception this time around.

(And man now that i'm thinking about gray ghost, im now thinking about various like. scenes i could write between the two of them. maybe in a reblog.)

Anyways uhhh things relatively go the same as canon. Yeah. I think Sam still has a crush on Danny and still spies out of jealousy with Tucker.

Now, the Gregor episode! With that out of the way; the TVTropes recap for this episode isn't the best because it doesn't go into detail about the entire episode like it does with Flirting With Disaster and Shades of Gray.

(which i looked at earlier because I made a section of this post talking briefly about what changes I'd make to the Shades of Gray episode to help set up Gray Ghost, but ended up deleting because it was kinda irrelevant for the matter at hand.)

So I'm taking in bits of the episode clips at a time, I'll try not to get too nitpicky about how each scene goes because then it's gonna take me a longer time to write this.

But! First thing's first; since Danny is not romantically interested in Sam, he is also not jealous of Gregor. He is however, a bit eyebrow-raisey at him in their first introduction, but that's because Gregor is coming off as obnoxious.

Danny thinks he's kinda annoying, and it doesn't take a genius to see that Gregor is trying to impress Sam. But since they've only known him for five minutes he takes the good faith assumption and assumes that Gregor is genuinely trying to show interest in Sam's interests too because he likes her, so he keeps mum. The fake hungarian accent is weird, but it's overall harmless, so he doesn't point it out.

He does do the spying thing when he starts suspecting that Gregor might be working for the GIW. The episode only has this happen twice, but for the au this happens a handful of more times over the course of the week, with Danyal's suspicion steadily rising more and more each time.

Hah, when he brings up wanting to spy on Sam and Gregor because of this reason, Tucker still does his "woah! you wanna spy on Sam?" thing.

Danny immediately turns to him, completely unimpressed, and crosses his arms. "Tucker," he says, deadpan, "you and Sam spied on me and Valerie."

He uses a combination of his ghost powers and his regular stealth ability to spy on them. He's hiding in a tree when they're skipping rocks, close enough that he can use his powers to hear them talk but far enough away that he has a good view of their surroundings.

He's invisible in the cinema, but doesn't accidentally get in front of the projector. He checks the inside of the room for the GIW, and then waits outside the actual room itself, keeping an eye on the area and occasionally flying in to watch the movie out of boredom. It reminds him of being back on a recon mission with the League, but it doesn't end with him orchestrating someone's death.

Then when they're at the mall he stays in human form, blending in with the crowd. He runs into the GIW there, but realizes that they're not there because of Gregor; they're just shopping. They didn't show up at either of the last two locations, and he follows them to make sure they're not also trying to blend in. But they're literally just there for shopping.

Danny is rather pleased with this turnout; so far Gregor isn't a spy, he's just annoying. The next day at lunch he asks Sam how her date with Gregor went, and that's how she figures out he spied on them, because well, she didn't tell him that.

"Have you been spying on me?"

Danny messes with his food a little bit, and Tucker is sinking into his seat with embarrassment. He frowns, "Only last night. Those incompetent government dodos--"

His lip curls up; he gets all 'Shakespeare-y' (as Sam and Tucker put it) when he's insulting someone, "--kept appearing whenever Gregor did. I followed you and him last night to make sure he wasn't a spy."

A roundabout way of saying, "I was worried".

Sam is, as canon, furious. Danny understands why, he knows generally speaking that people don't like being spied on. But he's confused on just how angry she is, and is a little irritated by it.

"Why would you do that!" She exclaims, "That's way out of line, Danny."

"How? You spied on me when I was going on dates with Valerie." He narrows his eyes, and points his fork at her, "I'm not blind, I noticed."

"That's different, we told you why we were suspicious. And we don't have ghost powers like you do."

"I don't need ghost powers to sneak around, Sam, you've seen this firsthand. And I just told you why I followed you, I thought he was working with the guys in white--"

"So you think someone can only be interested in me if they're after you?" (this is a paraphrased quote, folks ;D)

"No! If that was the case I would have voiced my concern the moment I thought it. I don't get why you're so angry, you spied too."

Iiits.... a mess. Sam storms off with Gregor, Tucker tags along because okay, yeah, maybe Gregor isn't with the GIW, or maybe last night was a fluke. Either way he ends up tagging along. Danny overhears that conversation between the GIW and Mr. Lancer, and maybe he's right, maybe he's wrong; but something is up.

I've gotten to that scene in the locker room where Gregor tells Danny that he knows he doesn't like him, and I've paused at Danny's reply to say this: Danyal doesn't even bother trying to deny it.

"I know you do not like me."

"You're right; I don't."

"Ah, let me finish. I know you do not like me because you want to protect your friend, Sam, and I respect that."

"...That's correct."

"Good! Because I am going to ask her out."

"I had a feeling you'd say that," he stands up, claps his hand tight on Gregor's shoulder, and leans close to him with a threatening smile, "so you understand me when i say; if you break my best friend's heart, you're as good as dead, right?"

"Ah,, yes. I am so glad we got that cleared out of the way, and now I hope after we can.. how you Americans put it, hang out?"

In the episode he hugs Danny and gives him a la bise (which is that french greeting where you kiss someone on the cheek two or more times) after they end their conversation. But here, when he goes to do that to Danyal, Danny leans away, points an accusatory finger at him, and says; "Absolutely not; we are not close."

The next scene after that is like, end of day. Sam, Tucker, and Gregor walking away. Sam looks over her shoulder to glare at Danny, then gets forlorn. Tucker looks back and just looks forlorn.

(When did I start narrating each scene?? Eh, I'm writing this in brief spurts of time throughout the day. Don't fix what's not broke)

After that there's this whole scene with the two GIW agents that have been chasing Phantom all episode. They're there because they have Tucker's PDA that Skulker took, and it's got the information of their purple backed gorilla assignment on it. They've been going around seeing who Tucker associates with in hopes of catching Phantom.

Uhh ahaha and that is where this gets a little interesting imo, and also allows me to mention that im retconning Danyal's (already) redesigned ghost form. Which I've wanted to retcon even before this moment bc it was just too busy. I'll get to that in a moment.

The GIW suspect Gregor for being the Phantom because of his white hair and green eyes, which is all fine and dandy until you remember: Danyal (and by extension Phantom) has that very noticeable, rather identifiable facial scar that goes across the middle of his fucking face. The GIW could easily suspect that Phantom hides his scar with makeup if he's in disguise, but if they meet a kid with a seemingly identical facial scar and similar disposition? Hoo boy.

Solution? I've got two: Gregor is canonically a kid from Michigan who faked everything to impress Sam. Considering he knows she's gothic and knows that she's ultra-recyclo vegetarian? He probably watched her from afar or got information on her somehow. His hair is dyed, his eyes might just naturally be green, but if he notices that she's got a crush on either Danyal or Phantom? A little sfx makeup could help him recreate a similar looking scar.

My second solution that's gonna happen anyways bc its that suit redesign; Danyal does hide his face as Phantom. Ghosts are emotional creatures and its a popular headcanon that their interests, ambitions, etc, influence the way they look as a ghost, not just their death. A big reoccurring theme of my au is that Danyal did not leave the League unscathed, and that being an assassin is an important part of his identity.

So i'm discarding the hazmat suit look entirely and leaning into the 'assassin' thing. But the general (stylized) feel is like, white ribbon/cloth vambraces that he has used as a garrote at some point, a hood, a gaiter scarf-type thing. I'm keeping the cape. I did a doodle a few days back that's not the official redesign, but a redesign for Phantom. I may reblog this post with that attached because it's got the general feel down. There's very little white involved, but the inside of his cape flares out and looks like the night sky.

Now, the hood and gaiter scarf gets rid of most of the problem, but Danny's hood doesn't stay on all the time, so the GIW have likely seen the upper half of the scar. :] Gregor's own drawn-on scar doesn't have to be 1:1, but it looks close enough, right? A small scar cutting through the edge of his brow and ends right below the corner of his eye. A 'cool, badass' one opposed to Danny's 'garish' scar.

But! Back to the episode scene. Canon Danny gets written off as being 'too prepubescent' to be Phantom, and honestly it'd be hilarious if Danyal was written off for the same reason (he's calling them idiots in his head if they do). But instead -- leaning into the GIW's incompetence here -- he gets written off as being too mature or too talkative. Or something equally as absurd.

Sam breaks up with Gregor for canon reasons, but when Gregor does his "i really like you, but, come on-!" and gestures to tucker, he adds on "and that scary friend of yours too, seriously!"

Things go relatively the same as canon after that. Danny does end up apologizing for spying, however. Sam does it first. Sorrows, prayers, all that.

Things usually end up changed or different when I actually write it down, so I'd likely add more or adjust different scenes according to the flow of the oneshot. This is just like, a general vibe of how things would go, and where some of the more obvious changes would be if I did write this oneshot.

Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for the ask :]

#dp x dc #dpxdc #dpxdc crossover #danyal al ghul au #danyal al ghul #i dont even mind the trope that danny becomes like his canon self i just want *some* kind of impact on him. but as it stands most aus i've #seen lowkey treat his assassin background as an accessory. like dyeing your hair or piercing your ears. that being said its also a silly #au where they're brothers and are related to each other and thus doesn't have to be that deep at all! im just bored of seeing the same thin #all the time. especially considering danny is usually depicted as the paler/whiter passing twin and being the 'kinder. more compassionate'#one between the two of them. give me danny who suffered crises of morality! danny whose morally darker than a cloud #morally orange and blue danny who sooner understands 'dont litter' than 'dont murder'. arrogant danny! he dotes on the people he loves but #is an utter bitch to everyone else and thus has to learn to be kinder. danny discovering himself outside being an assassin #his brother remembers a kind and compassionate older brother because thats how danny interacted with him. But danny had no qualms turning #around and slicing the tendons of one of the other assassins because of smth they did that displeased him.#he can still be like his canon self but shouldn't there be something that stays behind? Lingering like a blast shadow?#danny who carries weapons on him always even though he knows he doesn't need it but it makes him feel safer.#danny who spits out the oddest. most foreboding shit sometimes and his friends just stare at him and go 'bro what the fuck??'#idk if i can share the website where i found the episodes bc of risk of copyright. but just search up #'where can i watch danny phantom for free' and look for a reddit post with that question. the comments give website options.#i keep thinking about gray ghost now. valerie finds herself becoming a member of the 'danny fenton protection squad' with sam and tucker #danny takes a page from his beloved mother's book and calls his partners 'beloved' and equally sappy pet names.#he also throws the BIGGEST shitstorm of the century when he finds out about what Axion Labs did to the dogs. hoo boy.

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peachiseas · 8 days

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Ya know, as someone who has been in this fandom for nearly 2-3 years, I have seen so many people jump at other people for being critical of OL when there are very obvious fuck ups that the game devs should have taken time to correct instead of letting it stay and fester.

For example:

Terry's step 4 design in general and how grossly sexualized it is when he's a trans man

The inclusion of white supremacy through one of the LI's parents

Cliff never having a set enthicity and therefore letting people decide what race Cove should be so they dont have to worry about confronting their feelings on dating a mixed man

I can go on and on about this, but you can enjoy a game and criticize aspects of it that wasn’t handled well. You should, at the very least, be neutral on when people criticize those aspects because each criticism is an improvement that the devs can take forward to their next games

#candy girl.txt #had to just spit this out cause the amount of people who have just been sayin you cant dislike aspects of a game has been growing and uhm #i love ol a Lot but there are some Very fucked up things in game that never get handled #or well handled well if at all

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moonspirit · 4 days

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You are loved, by all standard definitions of the word.

You are cared for, by the people around you. They tell you you're great, they tell you they're glad you exist, they tell you you're valuable and priceless and the world is a better place because you're here. They tell you that you do things in a way others cannot, they tell you how amazing you are.

You have had an ordinary childhood. Things didn't go too wrong; you had friends, though few, but you made good memories. You grew, you played, you laughed, you cried. An ordinary childhood, like every other kid your age. Some things did hurt you, some people did leave you, but all of that was so long ago and the memories are blurry now; surely, they don't hurt you anymore.

The people around you, they love you.

And yet - you hate yourself.

Everything about yourself is awful, like a monster but not even a normal monster; a crippled, twisted, ugly monster incapable of even functioning the way it should. Everything is a task, until you cry and claw your way through it to an extent where you can see nothing but faults in it - about how you've messed it up and how much you suck. You see those stares, and in some cases, no stares, and you wonder if you're really so bad. You spend nights curled up in bed, hugging your knees, wondering why you are the way you are, why you can't just square your shoulders, hold your head proud, and live. But the shame has been so strong since that very normal childhood, that not even your friends' compliments and reassurances are any source of comfort.

You know what you're good at, but you can never bask in the pride. You know what your strengths are, but you feel too weak to show them. You know you are valuable, just a bit, but you can't see an inch of it, and you want to withdraw and crawl into your shell until your soul turns invisible.

You are subpar, too incapable, not good enough, never good enough, the world will be a better place without you, your friends will be happier without you, and there they are, waving their hands at you and calling you over with big smiles and genuine love, but they can't love you, they don't love you, why would they? There's not one good reason they should love you - or so you can't help but believe.

You are not worthless, you know this, but there's a void in your heart that won't let you believe.

Where does this ugliness in your soul come from? Why won't it leave you alone?

Why the fuck won't it leave you alone?

Perhaps this is how Armin felt before he was brought back to life by the people who loved him.

#because after he was revived everything just got worse tenfold.#i had to spit this out #not too sure if it makes sense but have it anyway #armin arlert #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #snk #aot #arminarlert

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bleaksqueak · 2 months

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While i work I've been listening to an LP of the Telltale Walking Dead Games (the ones with clementine, I do not care about the others lmao). Ages ago when I played these I was well aware/amused that part of season 2 takes place in Parker's Crossroads/Parker's Run because I grew up right next to it and the detail stood out to me. But I never caught the line of "We'll head to parker's run. It's just up the road from here" until just right now. So I had a sort of "wait, where the fuck are they supposed to be right now?" (search)

ARE YOU SHITTING ME LMAO So by process of elimination, since it's the only city with anything even remotely resembling a large home supply store, that would mean they're in my literal hometown. My tiny hometown in the middle of nowhere that's never in anything that barely anyone knows of. How in the fuck lmao

#shut up pu #random stuff #I guess Howe's would be our Co-Op #I moved away forever ago but my brain often still returns to that tiny town. the biggest city in henderson county. lmaoo #Did they just randomly pick a place on the map for the location... parker's crossroads/run surprised me but it's at least more of a thing #i'm upset with myself for never picking up on that before #sorry telltale but we never had a comic book store you have to go all the way over to the next county for that #also your geography's wrong it's east tennessee that has mountains #west tennessee is all hills #i'm being nitpicky but it's out of amusement #of all the places to end up in a zamboni apocalypse #my poor girl clem lucky she made it out at all #lmao I strongly dislike this series all BUT these games with clementine #and I love her so much #goes to show what a good likable character can do #anyway I'm upset that you don't get to go raid the dairyqueen in season 2 #maybe this is an odd thing to post about but I literally come from a #“the nearest starbucks is 40 minutes away” level of tiny nowhere town #and playing this game when it first came out only to realize this detail about a decade later made me spit my drink out

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todayisafridaynight · 2 years

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he’s just a businessman all about business

#rgg #ryu ga gotoku #ryu ga gotoku 3 #yakuza 3 #yoshitaka mine #goro majima #daigo dojima #minedai #snap sketches #my favorite trope is just characters with completed shadowed faces when theyre being scary #idk why it just k.o.'s me everytime #and then Obligatory Beach Mine because the spit take i had when i found out about it

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goemon-fan · 5 months

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Part 4 Episode 17: Lupin's Day Off

#to be honest i really dont like part 4 #it had a great intro and solid first episode but then it just...flopped #goemon's horribly out of character #what do you mean he doesn't say sorry??#what do you mean he's not friends with lupin and jigen outside of work??#part 4 goemon is a spit in the face to what he's supposed to stand for #lupin iii #lupin the third #lupin the 3rd #goemon ishikawa xiii #goemon #arsene lupin iii #jigen daisuke #daisuke jigen

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kittenninja14 · 17 days

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Not entirely sure i like how this came out but i did have lots fun drawing/coloring her!!

Anyways some Skylor from Knox's Wobbly Hearts bc despite her back-stabbing behavior towards my traumatized boy, I love her for some reason loll.

Plus her hairrrrrrr!!! Knox dudeeeee... her hair is gorgeousssss!!! I had soo much fun coloring her hair lol.

Anywaysss yall should check out @ninja-knox-ur-sox-off's brilliant Wobbly Hearts AU... its an absolute masterpieceeeee

https://kittenninja14.tumblr.com/post/731916269075480576/hey-yall-i-just-found-this-incredible-video-and

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tanjir0se · 9 months

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What if…I came back, but I came back Wrong…and we were both boys? 😩🥵🙈🙈🔥🔥🔥🔥

Lil recolor of my Everybody Lives AU Kyo…welcome to the chat Demon!Kyo !!

As a demon, traits you had in life are amplified and intensified

In life Kyojuro was passionate and intense. As a demon, his passion has become rage, his intensity an animalistic single-mindedness. Leads him to be incredibly protective of Giyuu. The hatred/rage is turned onto himself, as he hates what he’s become and wants so so badly to find a way back.

His good-natured attitude becomes a tactlessness. Leads him to joke or chuckle at inappropriate times, say things without thinking, and openly flirt with Giyuu while they’re forced to work together

Something within him from life has become obsession…with Giyuu. He’s fascinated by all the little human things Giyuu does like communicate with just his eyes, the way he pulls his hair back, even the way he breathes. He can’t stop thinking about him. All his other new traits make sense but he can’t figure out where the obsession is coming from until he realizes

Oh shit I’m in love with Giyuu

In this AU Kyo was turned into a demon posthumously. So as much as Giyuu agrees that they should fight to find a way to turn him back, a thought occurs: if they succeed in undoing Kyojuro’s new demonic transformation, will that undo his resurrection too?

Can Giyuu stand to lose him twice?

#GOOD MORNING STUPID NATION!!!!! ITS FUCKIN WEDNESDAYYYYYYY #demon!rengoku #kny #rengiyuu #guys this au has been PLAGUING ME #I had to put it on paper or id explode #luckily for my lazy ass I just drew my mans last week so this was easy to spit out #my daily mantra and affirmation is if demon bad. WHY👏🏻SEXY👏🏻???

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clowningaroundmars · 4 months

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still suffering from bad motorcity brainrot so my brain conjured up a funny ass scenario where the gang finally learns more about texas' family.

well, more than just "texas has a real big family"

based off of chris p's confirmation that texas was going to have cerebral parents who are the exact opposite of him

Chuck shuffles in on socked feet to the pile of Burners casually lounging in their main living room area and chatting.

Mike is of course the first one to interrupt the conversation and greet him, noticing all the screens his best friend had pulled up. Then, when a semi-preoccupied Chuck didnt immediately answer back, Mike sat up and leaned his elbows on his knees.

"Hey, Chuckles. I said good morning!"

Chuck looked up suddenly, as if just realizing where he was.

"O-OH yeah hey guys, morning ahaha..." Chuck ran a nervous hand through his hair, revealing a furrowed brow that Mike immediately noticed.

"What's with all the screens so early in the day? You're usually halfway through breakfast before pulling one of those up," Mike chided jokingly.

"Uh so, like, late last night--"

"Morning. you mean early in the morning," Mike grinned, and then exclaimed when Chuck reached for a pillow to toss at his face.

"Last night..." Chuck continued, "I noticed something going on with the east gate. It's weird, the battery we found should have been full enough to last us 'til the end of the year but uh... yeah it's totally drained now, guys." By now, Chuck was taking a seat next to Mike and letting his friend lean into his space to study the screens. "And I was lookin' at the new motion sensors we installed recently and it seems like it drained fast right after someone... or something moved near it a couple nights ago."

"Yeah but if someone's trying to siphon off battery power from the gates, that could be a real big problem in the future," Dutch put in.

Julie waggled her head, considering Chuck's words. "Could be a lot of things, honestly. That fusion battery wasn't really meant to last long anyways, it was only a temporary fix at the time."

Texas kicked his legs in the air from where he laid on a beanbag at everyone's feet. "Wait, the eastern gate? Isn't that gate the one that was havin' problems that one time Kane busted in like about a year ago?" He crunched on some mystery substance in a plastic container.

Most likely something from Jacob's kitchen.

Mike laughed. "The very same, buddy."

"Tch'aaww that gate's lame. It keeps breakin' all the time! I wouldn't be surprised if it's just old and basically turning into total junk."

Julie turned to Mike and Dutch. "Y'know, he might be right--"

"Duh, Texas is always right!"

"...That gate really does have some history. It was the first offically maintained entrance into Motorcity years ago when Deluxe was first being built. I'm pretty sure Kane abandoned it on purpose after our crazy battle with those Ultra Golems."

Mike shook his head. "So he most likely cut the power from that gate then, huh. Makes sense why the battery's almost dead! That's a lot of heavy lifting for only one battery."

Chuck stopped typing on his screens for a second. "Why didn't we just scavenge for a newer battery after you beat that big robot Kane sent in? We secured that gate after, didnt we?"

Dutch and Julie smirked at each other.

"Someone might've gotten a bit distracted by an opportunity that ended up bein' a little too good to be true," Dutch elbowed Mike.

Mike guffawed and immediately tried to downplay the mistake. "Aw man, I mean yeah-- that, aaannd also we got that distress call from Doc Hudson not long after, too... so I mean--"

"Mmnn yeah, gotcha." Chuck deadpanned, returning back to triple-checking his maps and motion sensor logs.

"Anyways," Texas cuts in, "that gate's old an' dusty. It totally needs an overhaul, Texas-style. Hoo-WAH!!" He kicks his legs in the air in a flurry and uses the hand not holding his container to do a quick karate chop.

Everyone looks at him.

"Texas," Dutch starts patiently, "we're not construction workers, man. That's up to the Motorcity council to decide when the whole thing gets fixed now. I'm pretty sure they'd know about the power being cut off by now."

"Yeah, they should since I just pinged one of the council members about it too," Chuck piped up.

Texas shakes his head like a father explaining something to a child who isn't understanding what he's saying at all. "Yeah duh I know, guys, I'm not dumb!"

Dutch bites back a mean retort. Julie smirks again behind a carefully placed hand.

"I could just go to my mom and tell her everything! Then she can just send her construction worker dudes to tear down the thing and like, I dunno, hook it up to our own power supply or whatever. No effort on our part!" He flexes an arm casually.

A pause.

Mike was the first to speak up. "Wait, what? Your mom?"

"Uh, yeah, you guys didnt know my mom's head of the council?"

Dutch does a double take. "Head of the council?!"

"Yeah, Stretch. Head of the Motorcity council! She's been leadin' it since I was like a tiny Texas baby. She just keeps gettin' re-elected, heh. Makes sense since she's cleaned up and expanded a lot of stuff, I guess."

"...And she gave birth to you?!"

Texas, as usual, lets the insult sail right over his head. "I know right? Both my parents are totally lame and boring. Not like Texas, hwa-CHAA!! They don't know anything about martial arts movies, sweet Muay Thai kicks or Texasifyin' stuff! They just wear boring suits and go to like a million meetings! My dad's not like in city council or whatever but he's a uh... a... what's-it-called. An archic-tech. He doesn't even build the stupid buildings and junk, he just designs 'em."

Mike elbowed Dutch back, hissing "dude!" under his breath. Chuck snorted.

Everyone stares for a couple of seconds, Dutch rubbing his chin in disbelief.

"Wait, your dad's an architect?" Chuck asks incredulously.

Texas shrugs and stuffs his mouth with the mystery food. "Yeah? I thought I told you guys all about this!"

Mike leans forward and asks Texas directly, "does your dad only design buildings? Or does he help your mom with the city planning too?"

Texas munches for a few seconds before answering. "Mnnyeah, he's like... he plans and draws pretty much everything in Motorcity, like where the hotels and shops and stuff can go. He designed the whole downtown area I think. Obviously they're not done fixin' up the place, but the public bathhouse was his idea, so."

"He's an urban planner, Texas! Wow, not just an architect either, he does both!" Julie admires out loud.

Dutch leans back on the couch dramatically and sighs. "The bathhouse, oh damn."

Everyone took a quick second to reminisce about their trip to the bathhouse with fond smiles. It was a gorgeous Greek-inspired building as tall and beautiful as it was comforting, a recent addition to the bustle of downtown Motorcity. It had sleek marble walls, cozy alcoves for private meetups, grand staircases seemingly everywhere and polished golden accents gleaming in every corner.

The building was split into two sections with a giant-- and equally beautiful-- indoor garden separating the halves, and a courtyard with a net in the middle stationed out back for friendly games of volleyball or tennis. The bath itself sat like a reigning king in the front, right past the fancy lobby and locker rooms. In the back half, the indoor pool stayed open for swimming only in the summer. During the cold winter months the pool was frozen and turned into a makeshift ice skating rink.

Both pool and bath were massive and alive day after day with Motorcitizens relaxing after a hard day's work, meeting up with friends, or just taking the kids out to a fun day of swimming.

It was everyone's favorite spot to relax and hang out during chilly days thanks to the saunas as well.

Motorcity's gang members have officially sectioned the bathhouse and the immediate area off as a neutral zone, strictly banning violence and disputes from there. That decision was introduced by Julie and quickly adopted after everyone figured it'd be hard to tell which member was from which gang when they were all naked.

Knowing that Texas' father-- of all people-- was the man most likely responsible for that slice of heaven in an otherwise grimy and dark city was... well, it was weird.

"So," Chuck said, scratching his head, "your dad designs things and your mom orders the funds around. For, like, the whole city."

"Yyyup." Texas answers.

"Sooo... what does the rest of your family do?"

Texas takes a minute to think. "My grandma owns a shop downtown. All my sisters are out studying with people, doin' apprenticeships n' stuff. They mostly like to build and program stuff, one of them's over at the Cablers' right now. Oh yeah, my oldest sister is in a band! She's the lead guitarist and everything! She's badass, like Texas."

Dutch nods slowly, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Uh huh. Mhm. This idiot's family is super smart and accomplished. Now I've seen everything."

Mike huffs out a laugh. "Wow, Tex. That's uhm... yeah, that's great! Think we can shoot your parents a quick message and maybe pass along some ideas?"

"I've got tons of ideas for a more efficient electrical wiring system!! With better security in place too! And a failsafe just in case!" Chuck blurts out. He then realizes his excitement and leans back self-consciously. "AHA-- ahem, that is if they're uh, if they're, y'know-- if it's not too much to impose on them, of course!"

Mike smiles warmly at Chuck and turns back to Texas. "No, I think they'd probably love the help, right Tex?"

Texas guffaws, spewing a few crumbs everywhere. "Tchyyyeaah!! Texas' parents are always so dang busy all the time like... ugh. Yeah, Skinny over here would probably be their favorite guy for a while just for takin' on some o' the work."

Chuck grins and opens up a new screen with some schematics, and gets right to work.

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theloveinc · 1 year

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bakugo + the stages of breakup guilt (haha, get it?)

(warning: angst with happy end, gender neutral except a veil is mentioned)

No one makes Bakugo feel worse about the breakup than his parents do. Not your friends, ignoring all his texts and calls (other than the ones about the bag of underwear, socks, and your special moisturizer you requested be dropped off with someone), not Kiri or even Izuku when they look at him with pity in their eyes and offer to take him out for drinks. And not the dude who plants his ass against his crotch at the club and then calls security on him for taking a swing at his eye (he only gets away with it because the dodge was successful).

No. His parents do. His mother dropping the phone call as soon as the news is broken, his father calling back just to breathe long sighs into the receiver, listening to Bakugo’s long excuse as to why it all happened, then from somewhere in the back, “how could you!”

His initial reaction is anger, of course. It always is with them; they have no control over his life so therefore they shouldn’t care what he does, or who he’s in contact with.

But then the reality sinks in. Two, three weeks later, after days of ignoring them alongside everyone else, trying to forget the memory of how he promised them he’d never hurt you or let you go, surviving off of only the rotting vegetables in his fridge and with the distraction of working coverage (his chart records reporting an all time record of capture later that year)… he realizes they’re right to be upset.

They’re right for the ways they berate him the few times he calls, picking away at what little sanity he has left without you, his father’s withered voice when he asks “have you eaten? Are you warm enough at night?” and his mother’s flaming remarks, “don’t act like this isn’t your fault.”

They’re right for way they practically ignore him when he visits home—once, to celebrate his birthday—and he finds his father has given up crochet and lace embroidery and his mother has cleared out the guest room and taken down every picture of you… and him; the only ones remaining those from primary school and before, smiling like the little shit he always was and still is (least, that’s what mom says when she notices him staring).

Then it’s months later and the reminders begin. When Koda posts pictures of you at the grand opening of his animal sanctuary agency. When he finds one last box of stuff with your name on it, and his favorite mug is on top. When his grandparents ask about the wedding and everything just starts over again. For him, emotionally (his hair only just started growing back after he started tearing it out before shaving it entirely), and his parents, too, with their melancholy looks and bitter words. He knows when people are lying, and it couldn’t be any more obvious when they reply for him, saying they’ll all just have to wait for next time.

It never really gets better, his loneliness, the ache…

But truly, no one makes Bakugo feel worse about the breakup than his parents do. Not even you, when you finally return for that last box and cry when you see that he left an engagement ring inside. And though he would’ve fought for you anyway, you (practically) have them to thank when he gets you back.

(Mitsuki cries on your shoulder the next time you see her. Masaru shows you the handmade veil.)

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scatterbrainedart · 10 months

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🎵 As the shrike to your sharp and glorious thorn 🎶

It makes sense if you squint ok trust me

#do u see my vision #literally just ignore the rest of the song and the fact that shrikes impale other creatures on the torns alright #just this line #Nimona is the shrike inpaling herself on Gloreth's thorn #does it make a lotta sense? No! But the concept will not leave my mind so I had to just spit it out SOMEWHERE #so just take it #BLEHH #Nimona #nimona film #gloreth

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siriusblack-the-third · 1 year

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The Black Family: Indian?

Inspired by this meta by @narcissa-black-supermacy

Dani made some really good points about how the Black family could be MENA, and while reading it I couldn't help but notice the similarities between the culture there and the culture in India, specifically Maharashtra.

So many of the points Dani made are so reminiscent of the casteism in India that i absolutely had to make a separate meta instead of rambling in the tags over there.

A few of the points that i want to gloss over are taken directly from Dani's meta so. Let's get to it!

The first point I want to tackle is how large the Black family is, compared to other Pureblood families.

Yes I know what you're going to say; "but Amrut the Weasley family is also really big". I'm quite aware. The books state quite a lot that the Weasleys are weird for having such a large family. Well, the Blacks have a lot of people in their House, too (before the first world war, that is).

Walburga had 3 siblings, and so did Orion. Orion's father Arcturus had two siblings, and Walburga's father was the eldest out of four. Druella and Cygnus Black had three daughters. Arcturus' father was also one of four.

Indian familes are notorious for being large and complicated. I myself am the eldest of seven siblings, my father has four siblings of his own and my mother is one of three. My mother's father is the youngest of five, my father's father was the middle child of three.

The second thing that struck me was the similarities between the Black Family's brand of blood purism and the inherent casteism that prevails in the Kshatriya Maratha families of my Maharashtrian town.

Listen, listen. I don't give a fuck about the bullshit that the government feeds us about casteism being abolished. It might be "abolished" in theory but where I live, Maratha families are notorious for being hard-core when it comes to casteism and classism.

Caste intermarriage is considered "social suicide", especially if you're a person from an upper caste marrying someone from the lower caste. Sound familiar? A Pureblood marrying a Muggleborn sounds the same, doesn't it? The disowning of Andromeda and blasting her off the family tapestry is very similar to what happens here; disinheritance is very common for people who marry a "lower caste" person.

Casteism has been around for centuries, the same way the Blacks were blood purists for centuries. And keep in mind that the Black family were not your regular pureblood supremacists. Their views have been around for generations, passed down from parent to child. Unlike regular Pureblood "I'm-better-than-you" bullshit, the Black Family's brand of blood purism is so similar to casteism in India that I'm embarrassed it took me so long to realise.

The cousin intermarriage! That is such a huge point!

In many parts of India, marriage between cousins is pretty common. Orion and Walburga are second cousins, if I'm not mistaken.

If we look at it genetically, the people of Ancient India knew that chances of deformation and/or mutation of a child born to first cousins was almost the same as that of a child born to non-related people i.e an extremely low chance. Thus, cousins marrying each other wasn't and isn't considered weird or strange.

You may argue that the Gaunts were also inbred. Yes well, the Blacks were intelligent enough to know how far of a relation must be there between two people. And the Gaunts probably married their own siblings for them to be so inbred.

Now, as Dani said, 12GP being at the heart of Muggle London is pretty interesting.

As she mentioned about the Blacks, they're raging bigots, but they still live in a very muggle neighbourhood in a very muggle region of London.

Exactly like it makes sense with sectarianism as Dani explained it, it also makes sense with respect to casteism. Upper caste (Brahmin, Kshatriya) will mingle with intermediate castes and lower castes. They will talk, they will laugh, they will build friendships and make acquaintances. The different castes mingle a lot. But marriage? No. The Black family is essentially the same.

Like Dani puts it: we can work with muggleborns and blood-traitors.... They are allowed to exist.... remind them who is the boss, but do not engage. We will not marry them, we will not let them into our house.

This is literally what caste discrimination looks like. It's not based on fear or hatred like western bigotry. (I will not elaborate more on this bc the politics are wayy too complicated.)

The fifth point is niche, but it's there: Bellatrix wanting to kill Andromeda, Ted and Nymphadora Tonks because Andromeda "sullied her pure blood by associating with mudbloods"

Let me say this once and for all: honour killings are extremely common in India.

Families hire other people, or they themselves go out to perform honour killings. Many of the honour killing cases that I've heard/read about have been about the daughter/son marrying a person from a lower caste and running away, but being tracked down and murdered by their own family for "dirtying their blood" and "sullying the family name" (yes those are the actual words).

Andromeda's disinheritance was not surprising to me; i have seen people thrown into jail for marrying lower/higher. Obviously, the reason cited in court is not the marriage, no— the person is framed for crimes they did not commit.

Bellatrix wanting to murder her own sister— and actually murdering Dora— sounds so identical to the news I've heard over the years.

The Black Family could be Maharashtrian, is all I'm saying. Just because their slogan is French doesn't mean they're from France. India has several regions where France is spoken just as much as the local language. Like Dani said, kill the idea that French is spoken only in France.

This is all for now. I might come back later with more observations if I feel like it, but yeah. Feel free to flood my ask box with whatever questions you want.

Tag list:

@narcissa-black-supermacy @the-chaosbringer @in-flvx @padfootastic @gracelesslady23 @mycupofrum @mrunmione @thewinchestergirl1208 @fiendishfyre @ad1thi @prongsfoot-wolfstar @siriuslystarbucks @xxmysticrosexx @ghostie-0 @pan-diasaster @h-m-i-a-n @constant-diablerie @strwbi-laces @shanti-ashant-hai @roalinda @fooochka

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