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#I hope you end up liking some of these!!!
sunsburns · 1 day
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good luck, babe!
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pairing: tashi duncan x fem!reader x patrick zweig x art donaldson
summary: patrick zwieg invites tashi duncan and art donaldson to join him at your engagement party. you think they came to celebrate you and your new chapter and put the past behind you, rebuilding lost friendships, but tashi hopes to stop you from marrying a man you never wanted.
—or: the trio crashes your engagement party
word count: 10k+ (i have a serious problem)
contains: SMUT 18+, smut with a lot of plot, post-challengers movie, fluff & comfort, angst, tashi’s pov but lowkey get's mixed up around the end, foursome, oral (fem receiving), oral (m receiving), p in v, unprotected sed (wrap it before yall tap it), homewrecking, cheating but also not cheating but also a worse third thing, three-way make out, four-way make out, dom!tashi, patrick being nasty, art being a loser, no use of y/n, situationship that lasts 13 years.
author’s note: this fic is based on this request with inspo from the greatest song on earth: good luck, babe! it was supposed to be a quick smut blurb but at this point, you all know i can’t write smut without some kind of angsty plot. everyone is super messy and there is some of the dirtiest smut i’ve written so far (it’s only going to get worse from here). this one is a roller coaster.
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It didn't make sense to any of them, how you could've possibly ended up with him. 
Tashi remembered him from Stanford vividly. He came from a white-collared family, with daddy's money that bought him everything he could've ever asked for, yet he still wanted more. He played golf and polo and even dabbled with tennis but never had enough guts or skill to take it seriously. But his dad funded most of the programs and events at the school, so everyone had known him, his charm, his family, and his inability to stick to one thing even outside of sports. He clung onto a new girl every other week, a new girl wrapped around his finger only to be ultimately tossed aside like the rest of them.
"What a dick," Tashi remembered you saying once, stabbing your fork into your salad while glaring daggers at him from across the cafeteria as he bragged loudly to his fan club about how he beat you in a game of tennis. 
Which he didn't. 
You let him win. 
His parents had been paying you to coach him, paid you extra every time you let him win a set or two against you, even if it was off the record. God knows you needed the money.
"I think I'm gonna quit." You said, turning back to glance at Tashi.
"About damn time," she snickered, shaking her head. "I told you you're wasting your time with him when you could be doing something better. Like training with me."
You had rolled your eyes and poked her arm with your fork, "If I'm still trailing after him this time next week, shoot me in the head and put me out of my misery."
Almost thirteen years later, you're walking around with his ring on your finger at your engagement party. A party where your fiancé announced your upcoming retirement after a tennis career run that Tashi would’ve killed for: a six-time US Open winner; two-time gold medalist at the Olympics; and brand deals that would ensure you and the next four generations of your family lived happily under your trust fund.
Clearly, you weren't marrying him for his money.
It made Tashi anxious, because, in some way, she could see that the marriage you will have with your fiancé is far too similar to how Tashi's would have been if she and Patrick stayed together. 
Okay, maybe that was a reach.
Or maybe it's how it would've been if neither of you had gone up to Art and Patrick's hotel room that night. Or maybe it would've been Tashi's ring on your finger instead.
She couldn't shake the bitter taste in her mouth as she watched you laugh with him, your eyes lighting up in the way they always did when you were truly happy. It used to be her who made you smile like that. She remembered the late-night practices, the shared victories, and the quiet moments shared in the comfort of her dorm room. She remembered the promises you both made and dreams of dominating the tennis world together.
But she shouldn't dwell on the past, she shouldn't think about what-ifs. At least that's what Art tells her with a hand on her shoulder. Tashi glances at his hand, noting the wedding band that rests on his finger. The squeeze he gives is meant to be reassuring, but instead, it feels suffocating.
"I'll never know how he bagged her," Patrick tuts from her other side, a drink already in his hand. He holds it close to his mouth, biting the rim of the glass before taking a swig, his eyes never leaving you. His gaze is shameless, tracing the way your dress hugs your curves, how your hair shines under the chandelier lights, and the way your lips move as you speak.
"Lucky, lucky man..." Patrick shakes his head, a bitter edge to his voice.
A waiter passes by, offering hors d'oeuvres, and Patrick takes enough for the three of them for himself, setting his empty glass on the platter. As he stuffs an appetizer in his mouth, he begins to walk away, his eyes fixed on you.
"Where do you think you're going?" Art asks, his hand slipping from Tashi's shoulder.
Patrick spins around, mouth full, and shrugs. "To congratulate the future bride."
Art and Tashi stand there, watching, almost dumbfounded when they see Patrick sneak up behind you, wrapping his arms around your middle and lifting you into the air. You shriek, champagne spilling from your glass, but once you see who it is, a wide smile breaks across your face.
"Patrick!" Tashi can hear you from across the hall. Patrick lifts you again, hoisting you into the air. You wrap your arms around his shoulders as he spins you around, your laughter ringing out—a sweet melody that draws the attention of everyone nearby. "You made it!"
Tashi feels a pang of surprise. 
You and Patrick had been in closer contact than she imagined. It stings, a reminder of the distance that had grown between you after her injury, much like the distance that had grown between Art and Patrick. She never knew you had turned to Patrick for comfort. Though it made sense—Patrick was the one you invited, not her, not Art. Patrick was the one who had to ask if he could bring two guests instead of the traditional plus-one. 
But surely, you must have known that if you invited Patrick, Tashi and Art would come too, right? 
Right? 
The question churns a pit of dread in her stomach as Art starts to lead her closer to you out of courtesy.
Patrick's arms are wrapped tightly around your torso, his hand resting too low to be innocent, but you seem happy nonetheless. Happier in Patrick's arms than in the arms of your future husband. You embrace him close, the ring on your finger glimmering under the chandelier lights as you hold onto the back of his neck, your laughter finally subsiding as the spinning stops.
As Tashi and Art approach, the reality of the situation hits her harder. She's watching from the outside, a spectator to your happiness, feeling the sting of what could have been. She forces a smile; your engagement to the worst person in the world can't possibly be the thing that makes her break. Not after everything she's built since she started coaching.
Art tries to catch your eye, offering a polite smile once you let go of Patrick. "Hey."
"Hi," you say breathlessly, a bright smile across your face while Patrick swings his arm over your shoulder. You seem happy, almost relieved that Tashi and Art were here as if you doubted their attendance. "Wow, it's been so long. You guys look great."
"Thanks," Tashi finally says, the words weighing on her tongue like lead.
"You look beautiful," Art tells you, and it's rushed as if he's been trying to keep it to himself but couldn't help it once he was close enough to you.
Before you can get a word out, another arm wraps around your waist, discreetly pushing Patrick away from you to slide into your side. Patrick lets out an annoyed groan, stepping aside as your fiancé squeezes you tightly and says, "She does, doesn't she? Hey, killer."
You turn to him, about to say something, maybe greet him back, maybe introduce him to everyone. But he doesn't let you, he's leaning closer until his lips lock with yours. It takes you by surprise—you flinch at first before finally letting him kiss you properly, his hand cupping the back of your neck, pushing you as close to him as humanly possible.
Art lets out a low, awkward sigh while watching it happen before him, and Patrick rolls his eyes, stepping back in search of a waiter for another drink.
He holds onto you like you're a prize he's won. Almost as if he's been competing with everyone in the world to finally hold you and show you off. As if that's all you had to offer.
You blink, clearly embarrassed, as you clear your throat to disperse the awkward tension in the air. "These are some, uh," you stumble over your words before nodding towards Art, Tashi, and Patrick, "some old friends from college. I'm sure you remember—"
He's interrupting you again, reaching out with the hand that's not on you to shake Tashi's hand. He holds it tightly, his thumb pressing against her wedding ring. "Tashi Duncan, how could I ever forget? Still beautiful as ever."
She has to force herself to smile, for your sake. "Good to see you too—"
"You know," your fiancé starts, cutting her off, "I still remember the time you told me to suck a bag of dicks 'cause I took up your court time. Best day of my life."
"Yeah," Patrick laughs. He's found another glass of champagne to sip on, and it's by his lips when he says, "who doesn't love getting cussed out by Tashi."
You wince. "Patrick—"
"No, no. He's right. It's one out of a million. I took it as a compliement," your fiancé says, glancing at Tashi again, his eyes darting up and down, lingering on her wedding ring once more before she finally pulls her hand out of his grasp. He spots the arm Tashi has been clinging to. "Art Donaldson, I'm a big fan."
Art stiffens as if taken by surprise. "Really?"
Your fiancé is nodding, and when Art glances your way for a split second, he tugs you closer. "You're incredible. Watching you play, it's like, woah! He's killin' it out there. Too bad you've retired though, would've loved to see you play longer."
There's a faint redness to Art's face when he nods. "Oh, thank you."
"I've always wondered if I'd turn out the way you did if I stuck to tennis." Then he laughs, nudging your side. "If only this one put me to work like Tashi did to you, maybe we would've competed in the US Open a few times."
You snort and shake your head, the idea of watching the two of them even standing on the court together amusing you. "You couldn't beat Art if you tried."
Your fiancé shrugs. "Maybe Patrick."
"Stop kidding yourself. You can't even beat your nephew and he's twelve."
He hums, turning so that he'll face you. He holds your waist with both hands, caressing you gently. "You sure know your way into a man's heart, baby," he says lowly before kissing you again. It's rough and messy, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth. You shriek and press your hands against his chest. He doesn't let go immediately, peeking a glance towards the trio while kissing you.
Tashi feels a knot of disgust tightening in her stomach. The audacity of him to touch you like that in front of them, as if he’s marking his territory, sets her blood boiling just a little bit. God, did no one teach this guy any kind of etiquette?
She catches Art's expression out of the corner of her eye—his jaw is clenched as he turns to look away. Patrick's lips curl in a sneer, the glass in his hand trembling slightly. He fights the urge to throw it.
Your fiancé reaches down and gropes your ass over your silky white dress before finally separating from you.
You stand there, looking flushed and embarrassed, letting him whisper something in your ear before he walks off, joining a group of men who whistle and catcall at him as he nears them. Each jeer and hoot feels like a slap to the face.
"Uh, sorry," you apologize, unable to meet their eyes as you blindly wipe at your chin to fix your lipstick. "That was... I don't know what's gotten into him. He's not usually like this. He's, uh... he's great."
Patrick scoffs, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Yeah, real great."
Tashi can’t help but frown, her heart aching as she watches you fumble. "You can't possibly want to marry him," she wants to say, but the words get stuck in her throat. She can't bear to hear the answer, especially if it's the one she fears.
Art steps forward, his face a careful mask of neutrality. "If you’re happy," he says, but there's an edge to his tone, a challenge. The unspoken words hang heavily in the air: "Are you?"
You nod quickly, too quickly, as if trying to convince yourself as much as them. "Sure, sure. I mean, what’s not to be happy about? His family loves me. I'm retiring this year, and gonna spend more time with my family. Hopefully more time with some old friends?"
"Old friends?" Tashi repeats, the words tasting bitter on her tongue. The casual way you say it, as if years of distance and silence can be bridged with a few meetings, stings more than she cares to admit.
"Yeah, before I get busy with the baby."
"Baby?" Patrick's voice is sharp, almost disbelieving. "You’re pregnant?"
"What? No!" You quickly sputter, shaking your head. Then you pause, a thought crossing your mind and you lighten up a little bit, a hopeful smile gracing your face, "But I do want kids one day. I want three."
"Does he want kids?"
"We've talked about it, but he shuts it down all the time."
"You poor thing." Patrick puffs out, pinching your arm before reaching for your hand and leading you toward the bar. "Let's bring this conversation outside, ladies. I need a smoke. And you all need a drink stronger than his champagne."
The idea of fresh air and a strong drink is appealing. After grabbing a bottle of finely aged wine, the four of you make your way to the garden outside the grand hall. The shift from the stuffy indoor atmosphere to the cool night air is a relief. 
The moonlight casts a silvery glow over the meticulously maintained garden, illuminating the path with a soft, ethereal light. You glow in your pretty white dress, the fabric shimmering as you take a seat on a patch of grass near the rose bushes. The scent of roses mingles with the crisp night air, creating a tranquil yet poignant backdrop. You glance up at the three of them who stand there, watching you.
Tashi raises a brow as you take a long swig of the wine. She didn't remember you to be much of a drinker. 
"It's not that big of a deal," you say, passing her the bottle when she finally sits next to you. 
It's as if her movement had woken the two guys and then Art takes a seat on your other side while Patrick lies down on the grass a few feet away to light a cigarette. 
You pout, "If he doesn't want kids, then we won't have kids."
"But you want kids," Tashi reminds you, but it's more of a question as if she's wondering if that's truly what you want. Don't get her wrong, Tashi loves being a mother, she would kill anyone for Lily, but you wanting kids barely before confirming your retirement threw her off a little bit.
"Of course I do." You hiccup, reaching for the bottle again. "I'm not getting any younger. It's just... he'll come around."
"And if he doesn't?" Art asks, his voice gentle but probing.
"Can we not talk about that right now? I just want to get shitfaced and party."
"Now we're talkin'!" Patrick interjects, his grin wide as he takes a drag from his cigarette. The embers glow briefly in the dark.
"Come on, everybody gather." Patrick flicks his cigarette off to the rocky pathway and snags the bottle from Art's hands. He raises it, nodding at you with that same smirk he's had for years. Snarky, cocky, and yet endearing. "To celebrate new beginnings. Even if your future husband's a dick and can't make you cum nearly half as hard as I can. Good luck, babe."
The rest of you all make a noise of annoyance, rolling your eyes. "Seriously?"
"Shut the fuck up, Patrick," Art scoffs, though there's a faint smile tugging at his lips as you let a giggle slip out past your fake annoyance.
Patrick's smile only widens at the sound of his friends' protests. It reminds him of the good old years when his biggest worry was which shorts he'd wear to his next game. "Cheers!"
As the bottle is passed around, Tashi can't help but feel a pang of nostalgia mixed with bitterness. The comradery of the past clashes painfully with the reality of the present. Is this how things are going to be like now? Is this night a call for a truce, waving the white flag so that all of you could be friends again, now as adults, making plans for brunch and getting the kids together for birthday parties?
You take another sip from the bottle, your gaze drifting towards the moonlit sky. "To new beginnings," you repeat softly, though the hope in your voice is tinged with uncertainty.
Tashi leans back, her eyes lingering on you, a mix of longing and regret pooling in her heart. Art sits quietly beside her, lost in his thoughts, while Patrick’s laughter rings out, masking deeper sentiments beneath his forced cheerfulness. The chatter and music from the hall spill into the garden, the warm lights casting a golden glow over the scene. Patrick talks animatedly about the seasons he thinks he has left in him, and to Tashi's annoyance, you encourage him.
She shakes her head at the way Patrick's eyes light up, glancing at her with a knowing look. Despite her irritation, she can't deny the comfort of slipping back into their old dynamic.
Suddenly, Art hums thoughtfully. He has been mostly quiet, listening to the conversation with occasional quiet laughs. Now, as he puts down the empty bottle of wine, he looks at you, his eyes more alive than they have been in a long time. "I had a burger for the first time in years," he announces, a smile spreading across his face as if he is proud of it.
You gasp, perking up as you reach over to hold his hands. "How was it?"
"Amazing," Art says fondly, "like heaven inside a bun."
"You should've seen him," Tashi smirks, shoulder to shoulder with Patrick, playfully kicking Art. "He was drooling just looking at the menu."
He rolls his eyes, "I wasn't drooling." When you fall silent, he looks at you again, frowning. "You haven't had one in a while, have you?"
You shake your head, "No, I think the last time I had one was when we graduated."
Patrick scoffs, "Bullshit."
You laugh, "It's true! I've been very strict with my diet. And now that I've retired... I don't know..." You shrug, suddenly getting shy as Art starts tracing stars against the back of your hand. "There are so many options, I wouldn't know where to start."
"It doesn't have to be anything fancy," Tashi says.
"Pretty sure I saw an old diner on the way here," Patrick suggests. He stands, stretching and groaning before bending over to take Tashi's hand and help her up.
You sputter, watching them all start to stand before you. "Shut up, we're not driving, you're drunk."
"But sober enough to see how badly you want this," Patrick teases, waving a finger near your face and smirking. "You're drooling."
"No, I'm not!"
"Sure you are," Art joins in, pulling you up to your feet. He swipes a thumb at your chin, "Look right there, by your lip."
"Oh," Tashi grins, "I see it."
"Shut up, Tash, no you don't." The words fall from your lips before you can stop them. The old nickname fits too smoothly as if it hasn't been years since you've called her that. Tashi smiles, feeling like a teenager again, messing around with you. She starts to walk off, Art and Patrick following her while you stand there, dumbfounded and a little breathless from their teasing.
"Where are you going?"
"To get a burger?" Tashi shrugs, and she smirks at you, a mischievous smile that makes you wonder if any of you have ever grown up at all. "You coming or what?"
You try to be reasonable, "I can't just leave."
"We'll bring you back before anyone notices," Patrick bargains, jogging back to your side and taking your arm to lead you to the exit. "Lighten up, when was the last time you had some fun?"
You don't even look back.
You find yourself laughing, nodding as the four of you make your way out of the garden. The moonlight guides your steps, casting long shadows on the path.
The walk is a blur of laughter and shared stories, the kind of carefree joy that you haven't felt in years. Before long, you arrive at the diner. The neon lights buzz softly, casting a nostalgic glow over the parking lot. You can smell the greasy, comforting aroma of burgers and fries even before you step inside.
The few people in the diner stare, watching as what seems to be a runaway bride and three wedding guests stumble and giggle over each other, lips a little purple from the wine you've all had and ordering burgers to go.
Once you have your food, you all find yourselves sitting on the curb of the diner's parking lot, the warm night air wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Patrick hands out the burgers, his eyes twinkling with a mischievous light as he makes a show of presenting yours to you. "First bite in... how many years?"
"Too many," You take the burger with a chuckle, unwrapping it and taking a bite. "Oh my God," you mumble around your mouthful, "this is amazing."
Tashi watches you, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Told you."
Art takes a bite of his own burger, nodding in agreement. "There's nothing like it."
You shake your head, going in for more, "This is the greatest thing I've put in my mouth."
Patrick, already halfway through his, lets out a loud laugh, "Yeah, I bet."
The parking lot felt like a little bubble of the past, untouched by the years that had separated you. It was strange how easy it was to fall back into the rhythm of your old friendships, how natural it felt to banter and laugh as if no time had passed at all.
Tashi rolls her eyes, though you don't even seem phased by Patrick's joke. "I can't even get mad," you say, swallowing, "I feel like I'm eighteen again."
"Tell me about it," Art agrees. Then he pauses for a beat, chewing on her burger a little slower before turning to you. "You know, this reminds me of that time... when, you know."
"Oh," You snort and nod, scrunching up your face at the memory. "Yeah. It kinda does."
"What?" Patrick looks between the two of you, raising his brow in interest. "What time?"
"It was a long time ago," you tell him.
"Like back in Stanford," Art explains, and then he points between Tashi and Patrick with his burger, "when you two were still a thing."
Tashi sits up straight now, her full attention on you and Art. "Oh, really?"
"It was that time Patrick came for a surprise visit in the middle of our girls' night," you say, nodding your head at her, hoping she'd catch up with the memory. "And you kicked me out of your dorm so you and Patrick could... you know."
Tashi nods. "Have some alone time." She finishes for you.
She remembers that night well: you were both nestled in the haven of her dorm room, the soft glow of the television casting gentle shadows on the walls as the movie played on. You were curled up under her covers, your bodies intertwined, legs tangled together in a comforting knot. The world outside ceased to exist in those moments, leaving just the two of you in your little cocoon of comfort.
Tashi can still feel the sensation of your fingers running through her hair, the tender, rhythmic motion soothing her in a way nothing else could. The warmth of your touch lingered on her scalp, your fingers traced lazy patterns, and she remembered the way her body instinctively relaxed into yours.
But then came the knock on the door, and she felt her heart jump at her throat as she swung her legs out from under the covers and padded softly to the door.
When she opened the door, there stood Patrick, his presence almost surreal. He was holding a bouquet of carefully picked-out flowers, their vibrant colours contrasting sharply with the dim light of the hallway. His smirk was both nervous and charming
"You kicked her out?" Patrick gasps, and Tashi gives him a blank stare. He's acting as if he wasn't even there, as if he didn't stand by her desk while watching her scramble to clean up the mess the two of you made in her dorm and shove you out the door before locking it.
Patrick shrugs, that stupid smirk painted on his lips again before he finishes his burger. "Would've let you stay if it were up to me," he tells you, "The more, the merrier."
"No way," you poke your tongue at the inside of your cheek. "She wanted you all for herself."
"Please, I would've been too distracted with you to even give him my time of day," Tashi admits. "I did you a favor, Patrick. Saved you from blue balls."
He holds a hand to his heart. "I'm so honored."
"But anyway," you start, "while I was walking back to my dorm I bumped into Art, who got stood up on a date."
Patrick blinks, turning to Art. "You got stood up?"
"Was it that girl from marketing?" Tashi asks.
Art's cheeks start to turn red, the flush growing from his neck and up to his ears at the attention. "Yeah, she, uh, she bailed on me last minute."
"I remember you telling me the date went well," Patrick says. "That you guys went out late, bought takeout... you made out in your car," Then, to fuck with him, he adds, "You came in your pants 'cause she kissed your neck. Remember?"
"And that did happen," Art confesses begrudgingly, glaring at Patrick while Tashi laughs. "It’s just... it wasn't with her..."
"It... it was me," you admit.
Tashi wishes she could say she's surprised, but it's nearly impossible because anyone who knew you back in college knew very well about the big crush you harboured for a certain blonde. She knew the way you swooned after him, even if you never tried to admit it because it was too embarrassing.
"Wait, so," Tashi starts, poking at your side and drawing a nervous giggle from you. It makes her smile. "Is Art that guy you told me about, with the puppy eyes and pretty smile?"
"Okay," you puff out, blushing, "I did not say puppy eyes."
"You think I have puppy eyes?" Art asks you, his gaze softening.
When you take a few seconds too long to answer, Patrick claps his hands together and swings his arm over yours and Art's shoulders, pulling the two of you closer to him. "Aw," he teasingly coos at the two of you getting all flustered, "you think he has puppy eyes."
"It was so long ago," you say, running your hands over the soft fabric of your dress. "I don't even remember."
"I'm so sure you don't," Patrick hums, a knowing look in his eyes before he presses a sloppy kiss against your cheek.
You groan, shoving your hand in his face to push him off before you stumble to stand on your feet again, wiping your cheek from his spit. "You're disgusting," you huff, but there's no real bite in your words because there's a faint smile threatening to appear at the corners of your lips. 
You stand there for a beat or two, brushing off your dress and feeling the weight of the night settling in. You stare down at the three of them sitting on the curb, the neon lights of the diner buzzing behind you. You can see the hall where your engagement party is from where you stand; you almost don't want to go back.
"Okay," you tuck your lower lip between your teeth as you hesitate, "this... this has been fun."
"Don't leave yet," Tashi says while Art's smile drops, his face falling in disappointment.
"Yeah," Patrick rushes to stand, reaching for you, "the party was just getting started."
"I really have to get back," you step away. "If anyone finds out I left, I'll hear about it for days. This has been great. Like, seriously, I don't think I've ever laughed this hard since before..." You trail off, your tongue getting tied as you glance at Tashi, then at her knee, covered by the length of her dark purple dress. You clear your throat. "Well, uh, I better go. But thank you again, for the beer and the burgers and the memories. I hope you guys can make it to the wedding."
You start to walk away before they can say anything. Like, on purpose, as if you know that if they tried to make you stay and ditch your party, you would. You would cave to their defences.
The sound of your heels is deafening. Tashi watches you go, she watches how you wrap your arms around yourself, and it all feels too similar to how she watched you go all those years ago and never chased after you. 
"Don’t marry him," Tashi stands from the curb. She's shaky on her feet, taking long strides to walk past Patrick and hoping to catch up to you. She sees you freeze in your steps, barely out of the parking lot. You turn to look at her quickly, face falling in shock at her demand.
"What?" Your voice is quiet, hoping that your ears are betraying you.
Tashi slows down once she is close enough, the distance between you is almost nothing but the gap feels like miles. The red and blue lights from the neon sign blend into a deep purple against your skin, casting an ethereal glow that makes this moment feel suspended in time. She watches your face, sees the way your brows knit together, the flicker of anger and confusion in your eyes.
Her heart is pounding, the blood rushing in her ears almost drowning out her voice. But she forces herself to speak, her voice low and urgent. "Don’t marry him," she says again, each word feeling like it's being ripped from her chest. Her resolve, which had held firm all these years, finally crumbles.
Getting Patrick back into her life had been one of the most complicated, tangled pains she had ever undertaken. The late-night calls, the awkward meetings, the painstakingly slow rebuilding of trust between herself and Art. 
None of it had been easy.
Yet, even with Patrick back, there had always been something missing—a void that only you could fill.
She looks into your eyes, her gaze unwavering, despite the tears welling up. "Please," she pleads, her voice breaking. "Please, don't marry him." The words hang heavy in the air, a desperate plea that carries years of longing and regret. She knows that having you back won't make up for the lost time, and won't magically fix all the mistakes and missed opportunities. But she can at least try, can at least fight for the chance to make things right.
"Tashi, you can't possibly be asking me to—"
"It’s not worth it," she tells you anyway, her voice trembling with the weight of unspoken truths. She knows it’s a risk, a gamble she's taking by laying her heart bare, but she can’t hold back any longer. The years of resentment, of silent longing, bubble to the surface, fueled by the sight of you with someone else's ring on your finger. It's a bitter pill to swallow, the realization that she resented you not for leaving, but for never coming back. 
Why didn't you come back?
Tashi's words hang heavy in the air, a desperate plea born from years of unspoken desires and regrets. "Both of you want different things anyway. You don't love him," she continues, her voice raw with emotion, "it's not gonna last. One day you're gonna wake up in the middle of the night and realize I'm right. You'd hate to admit it, but I will be right. I am right. He doesn't deserve you. He's no good for you."
You scoff, "And you are?"
"You said it yourself," she presses on, her voice barely above a whisper, "You've never laughed the way you do with us. And you kept in touch with Patrick, so that's gotta mean something." It's a feeble attempt to grasp at straws. "Marrying him will just be another excuse, another stupid reason. I thought you were better than that."
Then she remembers that night before you left for London, back in 2012. It's like a distant memory now, a flicker of what could have been. The air was thick with anticipation, the tension palpable as you stood on the precipice of something new. She remembers the way your eyes met hers after your exchange with Art at the hotel bar, a brief greeting with an old friend, both of you at the peaks of your careers. It is a silent exchange of longing and regret. For a moment, it felt like time stood still, like the world was holding its breath, waiting to see what would happen next.
She remembers the smell of your perfume, the bitterness of the drink you were having and how she could taste it when she kissed you; tongue running over your teeth, nails clawing at skin, hair tangled between fingers, hot breaths and unkept promises and false apologies and a night of regret.
And then the morning came, and with it, you had to leave. And she never stopped you.
"Tashi… I can't just throw this all away for you. For any of you. You were the one who told me to leave."
"I know."
"Because you know everything, right? Because you know he's not good for me, you know it all."
"I know you."
"No, you don’t," you say, your voice tinged with hurt. "Not anymore.”
Tashi huffs, shaking her head before she reaches out, cupping your cheeks gently in her hands. Her lips hover over yours for a moment, a silent plea hanging in the air between you. She waits, her heart pounding in her chest, for you to make a move—to kiss her, to push her away, anything.
You gaze into her eyes, tears glistening in the dim light, before finally closing the distance between you. The kiss is tender, and bittersweet, a culmination of years of unspoken longing and regret. It's a brief moment of solace amid chaos.
Your hands dig into the nape of her neck, where the short ends of her dyed hair tickle the skin of your wrist. The heat of your engagement ring nearly burns her, the edge of the diamond scraping against her skin.
When you pull away, breathless, Tashi fears this will be the last time she will see you. 
"Tashi, this doesn’t change anything," you say, your voice trembling.
"It changes everything," she whispers, her fingers tracing the line of your jaw. "You know it does."
But you step back, breaking the contact, the distance between you growing with each passing moment. "I have to go," you murmur, the weight of the decision heavy on your shoulders. "I need to think."
As you walk away, Tashi watches you go, her heart heavy with uncertainty. She clings to the memory of that fleeting moment, a glimmer of hope in the darkness. 
Back in the hotel room, an uneasy silence settles among the trio. Tashi steps out of the shower, her mind a whirlpool of conflicting emotions. The press of your lips still lingers on her own, a persistent buzz that crawls under her skin. 
As she rubs lotion into her arms, she takes her time, methodically moving over each inch of her skin as if she could somehow rub away the confusion and yearning. She finishes her skincare routine, staring at herself in the mirror, almost meeting the eyes of the eighteen-year-old girl who had her whole life ahead of her. It's a constant chant in her head not to dwell in the past. 
She has to focus—she needs to find a way to pull Patrick Zweig out of the top 200 ranks and get him qualified for the US Open by the time the next season starts.
Speaking of the devil, when Tashi steps out of the bathroom, she finds Patrick lounging on the loveseat by the open window. Naturally, his shirt has found itself a home on the floor, and a cigarette dangles from his lips.
He perks up when she walks out, sitting up to greet her, "Don't beat yourself up."
Tashi rolls her eyes and climbs into the bed, letting herself sink into the soft comforter. "Shut the fuck up, Patrick. And put that shit out."
"I'm just saying," he shrugs, taking one last drag before flicking the cigarette out the window, grinning when he hears Tashi scoff. "She's a stubborn little shit," he says as the hotel door clicks open and Art walks in. Patrick hums, "Probably only marrying him to piss us off anyway. Been trying to talk her out of it for months. Never listens."
"She might listen to Tashi," Art says, turning to his wife with a hint of optimism in his voice. "Lily's asleep, by the way."
"Right, because my word is stronger than both of yours," Tashi retorts, pulling the blanket over her legs.
Art and Patrick glance at each other before nodding, "Yes."
"Well, yeah."
They all sit in silence for a while, each lost in their own little bubble. The hotel room is quiet except for the faint hum of the air conditioner and the occasional rustle of the bedspread. 
Art joins Tashi on the bed, absently flipping through the channels on the television, the remote clicking softly in his hand. Beside him, Tashi pretends to read a book, her eyes scanning the same sentence over and over again without really absorbing the words. Meanwhile, Patrick rummages through the mini fridge, the sound of bottles clinking and wrappers crinkling breaking the stillness.
A quiet knock on the door makes the three of them freeze, their heads snapping up in unison. They exchange hesitant glances, each wondering if they imagined it. Then three raps against the wood sound again, more insistent this time. Patrick scrambles to the door, Art and Tashi close behind him, their curiosity piqued and their hearts pounding.
Patrick swings the door open, and there you are, a sight for sore eyes. You're still in the same dress, though one of the straps has fallen off your shoulder, and your makeup is smudged around your eyes. You hold your phone close, dropping it from your ear.
"I tried calling," you say, turning your phone so they can see Patrick's contact, a simple 'pat' with a cute tennis ball emoji next to his nickname. "You never answered."
"My phone died." He shrugs.
You let your hand fall to your front, where your fingers pull on each other nervously. Tashi can't help but notice the lack of a ring on your finger all of a sudden. She raises her brows at you, a knowing look flashing across her face before she tells you, "Something's changed."
You roll your eyes and step into the room, sliding between Art and Patrick easily. "A lot has changed." You walk until you reach the middle of the room. 
It's a big hotel room, not nearly as big as the ones Art and Tashi are used to staying in, but big and luxurious nonetheless. You fit in perfectly with your white gown and styled hair, a vision of elegance even in your dishevelled state.
You turn, facing the three of them again. "I hope whatever offer you guys were hinting at earlier still stands... I don't exactly have anywhere else to stay, unless I want to hear my mother telling me how she was right the entire night."
Tashi smirks. "You know I'm about to tell you the same thing too, right?" She closes the space between the two of you, tucking a fallen strand of hair behind your ear. Her nails brush against your jaw in a feather-light touch until her fingers pause below your lips.
"Yeah, I know."
You don't seem too upset about it. Instead, you're grinning, letting Tashi push her thumb between your lips. The gesture is intimate, charged with unspoken emotion. You're standing face-to-face when she says, "I told you so."
She leads you to sit on the bed, and you let her, nearly tripping over your heels before you land on the soft duvets. Tashi leans down, her nose brushing against yours, and you swallow your heart racing.
"You were right," you murmur. It's hard to maintain eye contact when your skin is buzzing with heat and when there's so much going on in the depths of her eyes that it dizzies you. "I hate it, though."
Her nose is cold against yours, a sharp contrast to the warmth of her breath. You let your eyes fall shut as she slowly traces patterns under your chin, pressing her thumb harder into your mouth before pulling it out. She catches the side of your face with it, making a mess with your spit.
She smiles, "I know you do."
Instinctively, and embarrassingly, there's a shiver rolling down your spine.
Tashi releases a small chuckle, and then, after a final moment, her lips fill in the small gap between you both. You sink into it immediately, heart rejoicing as her lips, warm and smooth, explore your own.
It's a little fumbly, nervous and making you tremble under her hands. Tashi loves every second of it. Her fingers grip your face tighter, mouth pressing to yours with more hunger as you wind your fingers into her hair and sigh. Between gasped breaths and soft sounds of enjoyment, she slips her tongue along your lower lip, and so you open your mouth a little wider.
Tashi ends up straddling you, making out like you're both teenagers again, putting on a show for Art and Patrick. The exhilarating butterflies twirling in your stomach match the memories, too. 
You moan softly as she pulls away from your mouth, her attention shifting to your neck. As you watch Patrick and Art make their way to sit next to you on the bed, the bed dipping, you tilt your head to the side and open up your throat to Tashi. You whimper as you feel her lips drag over your exposed skin. She nibbles and sucks until she finds the sensitive part that makes you cry out.
"Fuck," you whimper. You tug on her air-dried curls, coaxing her back up to your lips so you can enjoy the feeling of her mouth on yours. Tashi sighs, and you can feel her smiling into it while beckoning Art and Patrick to join in.
Their lips are on you in a split second, with Art pressing soft, ticklish kisses against your collarbone, and Patrick sliding his tongue from your shoulder to the back of your ear. He's moaning at the taste of you, sucking a bruise under your jaw while digging his hand into the back of your hair. 
He slowly starts to bring his sloppy kisses to your mouth, lips brushing against Tashi's and your own before she draws back. You whine, pouting as you watch her take a few steps away before making herself comfortable in the cushioned seats by a small dining table. You can't pout for too long, because now Patrick is kissing you, tugging softly at your hair until your back arches.
His tongue presses against yours, pressing as far back as he can reach, swallowing your every moan and whimper. You bring your hand up to scratch at his beard, then run your nails over his scalp. This is when Art starts to get a little bolder by running his hands up and down your thighs, pulling and pulling the long skirt of your dress until he reaches the end of it and he can touch your skin and take off your heels, tossing them aside somewhere.
Patrick traps your lower lip between his teeth, watching it bounce back into its place as he leans back just the slightest bit. You break apart with a whimper. Your half-lidded eyes meet his, then flick down to the trail of spit strung between your glistening lips. He stares at you, cheeks a little red as he smirks, "I've missed this. Missed you."
You smile, breathless as Art's hand makes its way up higher and higher and closer to your heat, his mouth is relentless with its attack at your neck. He grinds his crotch against the side of your leg and you cradle the back of his head with your other hand.
"You saw me last week, Patrick."
"Last week?" Art pulls away. His lips are parted, eyes a little dazed but focused enough to stare between you and Patrick in confusion. Tashi smirks from where she sits and shifts in her place.
"We're not all perfect, Art." You groan, rolling your eyes as Patrick laughs, reaching over you to start pulling down Art's pants who shifts in his place to let him. Once they're off, he looks at you, and it's embarrassing how fast you tangle together, melding together into a pathetic heap on the bed for Tashi and Patrick to see. 
Your lips move in tandem, his soft, pouty lips slitting against yours with ease as you lead his hands to your chest and shove them under your dress.
Art squeezes and fondles your breasts over your bra, his hips jerking against your leg again, almost desperate as his boner presses against the fabric of your dress as it has fallen down again.
Tashi startles you as she settles behind, one knee on the bed while her other long leg steadies her on the carpeted floor below. You let her tilt you backward, parting you from Art and she draws you into an upside-down kiss. The salacious kiss leaves your legs parting for the two men beside you. 
Patrick makes quick work of taking that damn dress off of you and you sputter out a pathetic moan when Art's soft hands tease your hardening nipples once Patrick gets half of it off.
Your dress eventually falls into a heap on the floor in front of the bed, you’d matched with it a white paired set underneath. 
"No fucking way," You peek one eye open slightly to see Patrick scowling while Art runs his hands everywhere he can reach, across your stomach, your thighs, under your boobs, down your back. 
Patrick tilts his head and groans, "I can't believe you wore this shit for him."
Your hand cups Tashi's jaw to deepen the kiss as you both ignore Patrick, only Art snorting out a laugh as he tugs his shirt over his head. 
Patrick slots himself between your open legs, stopping just a breath short of your aching cunt to nip teasingly at your soft inner thigh before dragging his mouth up to your neck again. He revels in the moans he's able to draw from you as he finally comes to caress your face. 
You pull away from Tashi and gasp in a breath. "Kiss me, Pat," You bite your lip, feeling your heart race as he eyes you up so openly. 
"Beg me," He counters with a quirked brow, challenging you. 
Your nose crinkles, "I'm not doing that."
"I'm not kissing you, then."
"Shut up and kiss her, Patrick," Tashi groans, attached to Art. She holds his face the same way she did with you, pulling him closer and letting the man crawl to her. But she's glaring at Patrick with venom behind it you know she can’t mean when she's trembling under Art's gentle touch as he slips off her silky nightgown.
"Come here," You beckon Patrick closer with a fiendish look in your half-lidded eyes.
"Yes, ma'am." Patrick nods, dazed as he obliges. "Anything you want, beautiful," His voice slightly slurs as the space between you diminishes once again. "I'll do anything for you," His husky voice drapes around your name like velvet as it's whispered against your plush lips.
Your hands easily find themselves tangled in Patrick's curly hair and tug him to your lips with aching want. You dive in immediately, lips meshing against and, eventually, catching against his chapped lips. 
A moan escapes from your throat and he uses it as an opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. From there, it's another flurry of saliva, tongue and entirely too much white-hot pressure building below. 
When you break for a breath, a string of saliva stretches between each of your red, puffy lips. Patrick groans at the sight and pulls you in for a slower, raw kiss that leaves you slick and trembling for more. When you pull apart again, Patrick plants a sweet kiss on Art's mouth before focusing back solely on you, his hand slowly approaching your white thong.
When he starts to rub, you moan into his mouth and start trailing your hand to his crotch, palming his dick. Patrick reciprocates easily and tugs at your lower lip with an impish look in his eyes. 
Lips attack your neck again, pulling you higher up on the bed. You hear pants and clothes being shed from every angle around you before you're surrounded again, hands everywhere.
While Art pulls Patrick into a kiss, Tashi cups your face again and draws you into a gentle one as you settle between her legs, your back to her chest. You rest your head on Tashi's shoulder as you heave out another breath, her hands travelling from your navel to tracing shapes on your clit, over your wet panties, spreading your legs apart with her own. 
"Please, Tash," you whimper as her fingers curl around the edge of the fabric and tug so it strains against your leaking cunt perfectly. She then decides to skim a whisper of her touch against your pulsing ache. 
You gape as Patrick wraps his hand around Art's dick, stoking it, and he lets out the prettiest little whine. Patrick slowly works his way down Art's body, running his tongue between each curve of his muscles, collecting the sweat that's been building on his skin before wrapping his mouth around him, taking all of it in one insatiable bob of his head.
Tashi's nails tickle lightly up your stomach, then in the valley between your breasts and then back down again. It has you spiralling, arching your back as she presses a kiss at your neck.
"You're being so good," she coos into your ear. Your name is only a breath out of her mouth, and she's edging your clit with a gentle roughness that could only come from a woman of her calibre. Tashi pulls your panties aside and flicks and flits about your dripping cunt like she already knows how to make you come undone.
It makes you tremble. You'd sworn up and down earlier about how Tashi didn't know you anymore, and here she is, proving to you that she still does, that she knows every curve and divot of your body, that she still knows what makes you whimper and twitch.
Your hand quickly reaches behind you, between the heat of your back and her body and finds her clit and you try to emulate how she's making you weak. Each quiet gasp you earn from her has you moaning back tenfold under her saccharine trance and she quickly starts pumping two fingers into you.
One particular flick of Tashi's thumb on your clit coupled with her lips gliding against and sucking your own in a wanton kiss sends you over the edge. You moan and cum, back arching as you relentlessly force Tashi's hand against your cunt, searching for more delicious friction. 
She takes you all, and lets you ride it all out on her fingers while swallowing every moan you let out in a lewd, wet kiss. Art and Patrick moan appreciatively at the two of you, then focus back on each other.
Before you're able to come down from your high, Art's shoving his come down Patrick's greedy throat. He swallows it all, pulling off Art's red-tipped cock with a vulgar pop that creates a trail of saliva in its wake. 
Patrick smiles down at you and leans closer, and you think he's about to kiss you but then he swerves and kisses Tashi instead, who removes her hand from your cunt and slowly works it up his thigh until she cups his balls and gives them a gentle squeeze. He moans into her mouth, winking at you amid his impromptu make-out session you were tempted to join.
You shimmy back and turn on your stomach, positioning yourself between Tashi's long tanned legs. "Can I eat you out?" You ask while kissing up her leg, and you want to hear how much she needs you. You bite at your bottom lip as you nuzzle into her juicy cunt. "Tashi?" You look up at her from where your face is pressed against her. Her sweet smell makes you sigh as you tease your tongue with her hip bone. "Please, Tash, let me taste you." 
"Yeah, go for it," Comes her breathless plea.
You finally pull her lips apart, revelling in how she squirms against your hold on her hips. 
You're on your knees, trapped arching between Tashi's long legs when you hear Art clear his throat. You give one long lick up Tashi's twitching cunt before turning around with her slick dribbling down onto your chin to where Art has sidled up behind you.
Art crawls closer to you, "Can I touch you, beautiful?" He tilts your chin up as he awaits your answer. 
When you nod, he easily descends upon your lips, placing a sure hand behind your head as he deepens the kiss into something absolutely filthy. As soon as you break apart, he kisses your shoulder, then down your spine.
Tashi guides you back to her. You allow her nails to tangle in your locks as she forces your head back down against her arching hips.
"Shit," Patrick huffs, rough hands reaching for the globes of your ass while Art's smoother ones trail up your spread, inner thighs. Tashi tugs at his dick a little harder, which has him panting against her lips.
Tashi gasps as you flick at her clit then quickly move to tease her entrance with the tip of your tongue. You flatten your tongue, dragging it across her length and repeat the motion until she whines for you to stop. 
You slurp the combination of drool and slick as you pull away with a pussy-drunk smile. She meets it with a panting, dazed one and removes her hand from your hair to push her own out of her eyes while Patrick sucks at her neck.
"Ah!" You startle forward into Tashi's tits as Art finally breeches your entrance with his index finger. 
"Eat our girl out, Art," Tashi motions for Art to lie down under your spread form to get a better angle. You can't deny that the new nickname drives you a little crazy. "Show her she's ours."
Art's soft hands draw another moan out of you as they assuredly grip your hips to keep you in place while he unleashes teasing licks against your pussy.
Tashi draws you back to her. You'd know that look anywhere—she's ready to cum.
"I want you," Her breath hitches around your name while your tongue steals the rest of her coherent words until she's a withering mess under your touch. 
Her pornstar-worthy moans ring out across the room like a beautiful symphony. Tashi's wanton noises coupled with the wet whines you're unleashing against her folds until the two of you create the lewdest duet this hotel's ever heard. 
She arches against the bedframe as she tells you her near release, tugging at your hair as she draws closer and closer to the edge.
Panting, she draws you against her lips for a sloppy, uncoordinated kiss. 
"Fuck, Tashi," You groan against her plump lips, feeling your own impending orgasm drawing near. "You're so fucking hot, I-"
She cuts off your rambling with another wet kiss. Her tongue flicks out to tease yours before sucking it into her mouth with a lewd slurp. Your hand works alongside hers to leave her shaking and whimpering against your lips as she comes undone by your hand. You smack her cunt lightly, eating the groan she feeds into your open mouth as she rides it out.
Tashi eats your moans as they echo against your messy tangling of lips and tongues.
Art's fingers start to pick up a pace as Patrick, feeling left out, starts thrusting his throbbing cock in the middle of your sapphic kiss with Tashi. You eye the two with half-lidded eyes as you share Patrick's cock with her. After only a few moments in your mouth, Patrick pulls out and releases across Tashi's and your expectant tongues.
"So fucking good to me," Patrick pants as he splatters the last of his come across your faces with a shaky groan. "Best fucking orgasm ever, swear it," He says as he encases his lips around yours, swapping his cum between your mouths before moving to Tashi to do the same.
Art moves out from under you, offering your knees relief as he lays you back against Tashi's stomach to fuck into you.
It's a slow and cruel pace, only made crueller by how Patrick and Tashi touch you like they already know where you want to be touched. Each brunette takes a side, Patrick sucking your tit into his mouth while Tashi's mouth draws you in for a kiss. Her nails tickle at your other erect nipples until you're arching off of her and into Art's thrusts, making him whimper.
"Just like that," Art whines your name. "You're so fucking tight."
It's when Patrick and Tashi move their attention down to your clit that you know you're fucked. Patrick spreads your folds with two fingers, watching as intensely as Art does as his cock disappears in and out of your hole.
"He could've never made you feel like this, right?" Tashi rasps. "He has no strategy, no real game. Just a fucking waste of space. Could never make you feel this good, this loved."
You don't need her to say his name, you know what she means. You're panting, shaking your head against her shoulder. "Never."
"Told ya," Patrick laughs into your skin. "Make her cum, Art. C'mon, man." 
"Fuck- please," You whimper, nodding. "I need to come, baby-" Without warning, you arch off of Tashi. Neither she nor Patrick stops their jerks against your clit as you gasp, eyes rolling back in your head with the thrum of a second wave creeping up on you with a steady building heat. Waves of pleasure roll over you as the tantalizing sensations become too much. You come loudly, arching pathetically off the bed as you desperately reach for Art, to hold him.
You're wriggling in Tashi and Patrick's arms as Art pulls out and releases across your expanding and retracting stomach as you pant out the remnants of your orgasm. 
"Shit," He moans, and his voice sends waves of aftershock across your body while his steady hands draw you against his naked chest for a toe-curling kiss.
You'd never been happier to have invited Patrick Zweig to your engagement party.
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nereidprinc3ss · 2 days
Text
do you believe me now? | 6
in which spencer reid and inexperienced!fem reader are finally honest with each other. complete with tears and more than a few make-up kisses.
series masterlist
this series is 18+ warnings/tags: angst but mostly fluff, i think this qualifies as hurt/comfort, HHEHHEHHEH, lots of kissing, so cheesy, you jokingly imply he's a slut, i need him expeditiously a/n: thank you guys for being patient with me!! ilysm!! i edited this until i hated it but i hope it's satisfactory for YOU guys..... as always please please let me know what you think!! and i already started the next part hehehe
The car ride is the worst of your life. 
Neither of you speak. 
And you find yourself wishing, pleading to god that one of you will say something to fix this—but each minute ticks by and the streets get familiar and a quiet song ends and you realize you were silly to ever think a twenty minute car ride would change anything. 
Spencer was the luckiest you’d ever been and your relationship is floating away like a balloon you forgot to hold on to—nothing more than a red dot lost to the vast blue. 
Maybe for him it’s easier. You’re pretty sure it is, as you risk one or two glances at his unreadable profile that turn into lingering, obsessive looks because you’re panicking and realizing you’ll maybe never see him this close again. It’s funny and terrible how quickly you’re remembering what it was like to see him at the coffee shop for the first time—how he was nothing but a beautiful stranger, completely unknown to you and worlds away. Now you’ve had him, sort of, and you’re turning into the girl who could never have him all over again. 
When he turns onto your street reality begins to sink in. Your heart is a short fuse inside your chest as he pulls into a spot and parks the car. The rumble of the engine cuts. The headlights stay on. 
For a moment, everything is quiet. You wish you could insert your own reality into the silence—one where you’re simply enjoying each other’s company and there’s no sense of impending doom to take your breath away. 
“Do you want to talk?” Spencer asks, looking pointedly ahead where the lights shine off the back of some other person’s car. A wayward moth dips and swirls into the high beams. You watch Spencer track it with his eyes. 
“I’m not sure what to say,” you admit quietly. The weight of everything you’d like to say sits in your stomach like lead, too heavy to divulge. It’s only been a few weeks of having to carry the truth around with you and your muscles are already fatiguing. The idea of carrying it around indefinitely makes your eyes sting. You’re already exhausted. 
Maybe a stronger person would find that last bit of energy to make a final push, to save the relationship just before it falls apart. 
But you never claimed to be strong.
Deep down, you must’ve known you weren’t ready for a real relationship. You can’t handle all of this pretending to be okay with things that hurt. Even if that's the grown-up thing to do.
“I tried. I really did, I’m sorry—I’m—”
Before you can get the words out your throat tightens around them and you bury your face in your hands. 
The sound of his seatbelt unlocking and whirring back surprises you—but you’re even more surprised when he undoes yours. Still, you move your arm so it can snap back into place and then he’s pulling you into him. 
“It’s okay,” he murmurs, one hand on the back of your head as you lean over the small gap between the seats, unable to stop yourself from shedding more tears. “It’s not your fault. I’m sorry.”
He’s sorry. 
For not loving you?
If it’s not your fault he doesn’t love you back—then whose fault is it? Who’ll take the fall?
But still, he’s holding you so carefully, like you’re made of porcelain. Something to be protected. Or at the very least, something to be mourned even after it’s in pieces. 
As you lean against him, lulled by the slow in and out of his breath, the inverse of yours, and the way he slips his thumb over the back of your hair in silence for a few minutes—you wonder what’s missing. Why he’s not satisfied. 
“I don’t understand you.”
The words come out flat, muffled by his coat, garbled with leftover tears. 
“What was that?” Spencer asks gently, still playing with your hair. You sniffle, adjusting your head so your cheek is to his shoulder and your lips are no longer smushed. 
“I just… I want you to explain it to me.”
“Explain what?”
You sit up just enough to meet his eyes. The movement seems to take him by surprise, but he keeps his hands on you—one slipping to your cheek and the other still loyal to your back. He brushes his fingers over the delicate skin beneath your eye and you cover them with your own in an effort to get him to stop treating you so kindly. But even now, when you’re mad at him for being so gentle in the way that he hurts you, you can’t help but seek the familiar callus on the side of his trigger finger. It’s an odd thing to anticipate missing, but you’ll miss all of him. You can’t imagine holding a hand without that familiar anomaly—a cairn to show you where he’s been and who you’re holding. 
He curls his warm hand around yours and you hold your joined fist out for him in emphasis, speaking louder than either of you were prepared for. 
“This! You! I understand that we don’t feel the same way about each other and maybe I can’t change that. But then you do this and I don’t understand why. I don’t understand why this isn’t enough for you, because it’s enough for me, and I just—I don’t know what else I can give you. I don’t know what else there is. I don’t understand why I’m not... enough.” The tears are back and flowing freely, but you forge breathlessly ahead, because you’ve finally found a way to be honest and you’re not going to stop now. Spencer is frowning, lips parted and clearly confused or shocked or something, but you continue your confessional before he has the chance to interrupt. “I want to be enough, but you didn’t even give me the chance, and I don’t think it’s fair that we’re breaking up when you didn’t let me try. Maybe if you just told me, if you explained what’s missing I could fix it and you could love me back, and—please. I just want to try. Please, Spencer.”
A car engine revs somewhere far away, echoing down the street. It reverberates for several seconds, unimpeded by any other noise. Any word, any breath. 
His voice is thin when he responds a moment later, still studying your face with a kind of scrutiny that is so indecipherable you don’t know how you expect him to respond. 
“Love you back?”
You blink. 
Your stomach drops. 
For all that you’d revealed, for all that you’d willingly humiliated yourself with your pathetic supplication—you’d meant to keep that four letter word to yourself. 
What a way to make an exit from your relationship. 
Spencer is still looking at you, keeping you pinned to your seat, and as much as you wish it wasn’t the case he’s not going to let you off the hook this time. He’s going to demand an answer, and you have a 0% chance of bursting into mist before you have to provide an explanation, so you have no choice but to say something. 
What, exactly, you’re going to say—you don’t know. 
“I didn’t…”
“You didn’t mean it.”
The response comes so quickly, sharp as a slap, that you jump back slightly, a deep frown twisting your brow. Spencer makes no effort to keep his hand in yours as you slip from his grasp. 
“That’s not what I was—”
“Just say what you mean.” Silence. “Tell me.”
It’s like he’s got an ice pick to your chest. It’s like he wants you to humiliate yourself even further, to punish you for your messy indiscretions. 
“Spencer…”
It’s a warning. You’re giving him a chance to stop this before he hurts you sadistically. Before he becomes unrecognizable. 
He swallows. 
“Please.” And then, a second later, when you’re still trying to process the quiet pain in his voice and suddenly faced with the unexpected question of who is hurting who, “please, just… tell me if you meant it.”
For the first time tonight, you notice how exhausted he looks. Slightly gaunt, even paler than usual. Shadows pool deeper in the hollows of his face. His eyes look glossy, dark crescents below awaiting to catch tears you realize you’ve never seen fall. The tonal shift has you so disoriented, so out of your body like you’re seeing yourself in his own injuries—the truth becomes the only humane answer. Even if it hurts you.
“Yes. I meant it. You know I mean it.”
“I don’t know that,” he says on a shaky exhale. “How would I know that?”
And he’s got the ice pick back at your sternum. It’s tipped in poison. The mallet trembles in the air. So does your voice. 
“You told me you didn’t feel the same. You said it was new for me and different and I was going to make things complicated and you treated me like I was a stupid kid, and—and it doesn’t even matter. This was dumb. I’m sorry I said anything, I don’t… I don’t know what I’m doing. I just.. I can’t do this.”
You’re about to open the door, every muscle tense as you wonder what the hell is wrong with you. What reduced you to the weepy, pathetic girl, begging a boy to love her despite knowing it doesn’t work like that—the same girl you’ve looked down your nose at in every film and TV show and in every high school and college hallway since you learned what self-superiority meant. Before you knew exactly what it felt like to be her. 
“Wait.”
He says your name.  
And of course you pause. 
You want a reason to stay. If you had more self-respect, you wouldn’t. But you know you’ll give him as many chances to give you an excuse as he’s willing to take. You knew that before your fingers met the metal of the door handle. 
“Just—hold on a second. Can you look at me?” 
You sniffle and wipe your eyes with the heel of your palm before turning around to face him once more. You wonder if anyone will ever have the kind of power he has over you ever again. 
The despair leaves only wisps of itself on his face—mostly he looks like he’s thinking hard about something. It’s jarring. 
“You’re talking about our phone call on Sunday, right?”
You nod petulantly with a quick teary eye-roll because obviously that’s what you’re talking about. 
Something lights in his own dark eyes as he inhales, parts his lips as if to speak, and stops himself again. Like he’s got news that he’s not sure how to break. 
“The things I said, on that call… I wasn’t talking… about you.”
Your insides feel like tangled yarn as you stare at him uncomprehendingly. 
“I mean, I was. I was talking about us. But not in the way you think, it was—” he stops, rubbing his eyes and taking a frazzled breath. “I know what it’s like to be the one who cares more. I have to assume that I’m the one who cares more because when I don’t, I ruin things. And with you, I felt like—the stakes were so high, and I thought it’d be safer for me to not say anything until I knew you felt the same. But I know that’s not fair to you so I tried to tell you over the phone that if you didn’t feel the same way it was okay. And now I’m—I’m realizing the way I phrased it was incredibly unclear and misleading, and somehow I fucked it up in a completely new way. But I wasn’t referring to you. I just didn’t want you to feel stuck with someone who can’t give you casual when you have so much ahead of you. I had no idea you felt that way about me. And I am so, so sorry that I hurt you. I never meant for that to happen.”
You blink. 
And for some reason, begin sobbing. 
Spencer freezes for a moment, then tells you to stay there and you barely have the capacity to wonder what he means as you hear his own door opening then slamming shut again. A moment later he’s on the passenger side, opening your door and leaning in. 
“Hey,” he whispers, gently pulling your hands from your face and making you turn your head to look at him. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. But that’s good news, right? Why all the tears, lovely? What’s wrong? Please talk to me.”
You take a shuddering breath. 
“This is all my fault, I ruined everything because I was too scared to tell you before and now—and now—”
Stroking your cheeks to wipe away the tears is a futile effort because they just keep coming, but Spencer does it anyway, and he speaks so kindly, so evenly it somehow hurts deeper. 
You were terrible to him. And he had been prepared to accept that. He thought you didn’t love him, and he was still willing to be the subject of all your cryptic frostiness and inexplicable cruelty. 
“It is not your fault. You didn’t ruin anything. I’m still right here. We’re okay.”
“But we’re breaking up, and—and I was so mean to you. That’s not okay, Spencer.”
You finally look at him. He’s close, eyes warm and wide as he looks directly into your own teary gaze, shaking his head earnestly. 
“You were confused, honey. So was I. It was just a misunderstanding. But… I know I was unkind to you. I cannot express how sorry I am for that, and the last thing I want is for us to break up, but if you think that’s what’s best, I’ll… I’ll understand.”
His voice is dangerously thin by the end, strained with impending tears of his own. But he’s eternally kind—backlit by the streetlamps and beautiful like an angel.  Whatever you want, he’ll give you. Even if it’s this. 
“I don’t want that. I don’t.” You sigh, closing your eyes briefly against the world as you realize the impending breakup had been a delusion all along. That you were going to let your insecurities and some sick pride end the relationship for you. All that despair had been for nothing. Or—maybe not nothing. You realize he still hasn’t said it back. But you won’t be a coward. It’s not worth losing him. You open your eyes.  “I just—I want us to be on the same page. And if you don’t love me yet or if you don’t wanna say it, or if you can’t, I get it—it’s okay, but if you don’t could you maybe just tell me? So that I’ll know—”
Before you can process it Spencer is leaning in, head angled to accommodate you, pressing his lips to yours so softly your breath catches and your stomach flips. Maybe softer than he ever has before, and it’s like taking a deep breath after holding it through a dark tunnel. You exhale a tentatively soft sigh against him, releasing air you don't have along with the fraught tension in most of your body. All too quickly he’s pulling away, hands still cupping your cheeks and thumbs stroking over your skin. When he speaks it’s not quite a whisper, but secret-soft. 
“How could I not be so in love with you?” 
Suddenly you can feel the world turning underneath you. Or maybe you’re just dizzy from lack of oxygen. Either way it feels good. A drop of warmth makes a splash in your stomach and slowly spreads through every vein and capillary until you’re sure you’re glowing gold. 
“Really?”
“Of course really. I’m—” he takes a breath of his own, and you realize how difficult this must be after what happened the last time he professed his love for a girl. Your chest aches for him. His voice is low and solicitous, but it wavers slightly. “I should have told you sooner. I wanted to, but I was worried—I was worried the way I felt for you was… too much. I am so in love with you it scares me. I still don’t know what to say or how to act around you. When I’m gone, sometimes I imagine quitting my job, just so I can come home and see you sooner. When I have a gun in my hands, I start thinking about all the things I would do to keep you safe, or—or just because you asked me to. And if what you wanted was for me to leave you alone, I would have done that. If you wanted me to drop everything and everyone to be with you I would have done that. And I know you’d never ask those things of me. But any of them, I’d do in a heartbeat. Which is… it’s a little scary, huh?”
The final sentence is a nervous self-effacing chuckle, which you can match in sound only—one breathy attempt at a laugh from your slackened jaw. 
When that’s the only response you can manage, he clears his throat. 
“Too honest?”
You shake your head as if in a fog. 
“No. Not too honest. But I’m just… I’m trying not to cry again.”
He smooths over your hair fondly. His own eyes are shiny and full of wonder as he studies you for a short while, like you're doing something much more awe-inspiring than sniffling in the passenger seat of his car. Then one hand is dropped to your shoulder and the other braced against your seat back. Finally, he pulls back to a more reasonable distance with a shaky sigh. It’s a sound of relief. You want to hug him, and all the past hims who have ever been hurt by anyone. 
“You, um—you need to rehydrate. Do you have anything that will rebalance your electrolytes? If you don’t I can go to the store—”
“You don’t need to do that,” you assure him with a small, watery laugh, loosely grabbing the wrist that brushes your shoulder. 
“But you need to take care of yourself. And I know you haven’t been drinking enough water because you never do.”
There’s a lingering overwrought shakiness to his voice, but it’s still the most relaxed he’s sounded since he came home, and you realize that the worst is behind you. The storm that you’d been so sure you couldn’t weather is somehow clearing up. 
“I can’t believe we almost just broke up.”
He hangs his head, dropping it to the curve of your neck and groaning. 
“Don’t say that. Let’s not think about that right now. Just—” when he raises his head again, and shakes it slightly to get his hair out of his eyes, they’ve cleared, like he’s on a mission to change the subject. “Let’s go upstairs. Will you let me take care of you?”
You give him an exaggerated nod, still sniffing, and the smile that grows on his face is like seeing the sun rise above the ocean. You love his smile. You love him. 
Spencer kisses you on the cheek. 
“Okay. Let me lock the car and then we can go up.”
As soon as you get into your apartment and turn on the light Spencer goes to the kitchen. It’s a small unit, but antique and nice enough, though you prefer Spencer’s. There’s still some tension as you observe him filling a glass with water, kicking your boots off by the door—but not necessarily the bad kind. You’re not sure exactly what it is. 
“Where are you going?” He asks as you pass the kitchen area to turn on a standing lamp in the opposite corner of the room. 
“I don’t like the big light.” A warm glow emanates through stained glass as you flick it on. 
“I know that. I just didn’t realize it was a higher priority than your wellbeing.” His tone is sardonic but he’s already switching off the overhead lighting for you. You give him a wry smirk as you finally approach and take the proffered glass from his waiting hand. 
“Ambience over everything, baby.”
His brows pinch at the cavalier sentiment—you never call him baby, so you're sure he knows it’s a joke—and he shakes his head with a humorous little huff of air through his nose, watching as you drink deeply. Your hand is shaking. Spencer notices and covers it with both of his, taking the half empty glass with one and grabbing your hand with the other. 
“Adrenaline,” he murmurs, kissing your knuckles. “It’ll go away soon. Did you get enough?”
You nod, smiling small but genuinely. Emotionally exhausted or not, you’re happy. 
Spencer strays, not far, to set the glass on the counter. Then he turns to face you, bracing his palms on the ledge and just watching you for a moment with the kind of smile that makes you nervous in the best way.
He beckons you to him with nothing more than a quick tilt of his head, and you shuffle across the floor in your socks til you’re toe to toe. Without your shoes on, he feels much taller. Still he just watches you for a moment—not that you mind. Your view isn’t half-bad. The faint warm glow from the lamp casts shadows over his face, highlighting all the perfect angles, deep brown eyes framed by dark lashes, and lips that still make you feel like a girl with a crush when you look at him. His hair is getting long. You’re unreasonably glad you still get to look at him like this. 
“Hi,” you whisper—something about the intimate dark of the room feels like a place for secrets. 
“Hi, pretty.” Spencer tucks hair behind your ear, eyes soft wherever they focus on your face like if he even looks at you too sharply you might break. “Have I told you how much I missed you while I was gone?”
He knows he hasn’t.
“Even when I was being a heinous bitch?”
Spencer laughs and it makes you smile too. The way his smile changes the landscape of his whole face will never feel any less like observing a natural phenomenon. It’s unfair how beautiful he is, and how you’re keeping him all to yourself in the dark on the fourth floor of an apartment building in DC. 
“Even then. Not sure that’s the wording I would have used.”
“I missed you too,” you admit softly. 
He maps your face with wandering eyes like he’s done a hundred times. Vaguely you wonder if he sees the same kind of beauty in you that you see in him. If he sees landmarks in your flaws and stars beyond the observable universe in your eyes. 
Spencer sweeps your hair over your shoulder, fingertips grazing your neck. 
“Can I kiss you?” He murmurs. 
Butterflies fill your stomach and you nod shyly, unsure of what would come out if you tried to speak.
His free hand settles on your lower back and brings you into him until you’re chest to chest. With his other on your jaw, he bows his head, and you angle yours up, allowing your eyes to flutter shut. 
Spencer kisses you so gently it aches in your chest, still cupping your face and stroking your cheek. You can’t help wrapping your arms around his middle—before he’s pulling away far too soon. 
And he’s laughing. 
“What were you drinking?”
You frown, flustered and trying to remember a time before his lips were on yours.
“Water.”
“Before that, baby. At the bar.”
You think back even further, head muddled even more by the endearment so that it takes you a moment to recall. 
“A Shirley Temple. Derek brought it to me. Why? Is that bad?”
“No,” he says, still smiling as his lips brush yours. “You’re perfect. You taste like candy. It’s cute.”
Oh. You feel warm as he presses another kiss to your lips—and this time you insist on him staying awhile. He’s happy to oblige. 
Spencer kisses you soft and careful at first, and then deeper, but still so slow, until you can’t help the way you’re bunching the fabric of his shirt between your fingers and rising on your toes to try and get impossibly closer. He kisses you the way you’ve been needing him to since he left, long and unhurried and sweet—and takes everything you give him, siphoning away all your leftover turmoil and angst until you’re weightless. You’re deprived of oxygen, you’re dizzy, and you don’t care at all. 
“I love you,” you breathe against him before he captures your lips again with a hum that flips your stomach, his hand rubbing over your hip. 
“Say it again,” he mutters against your mouth a second later, brushing hair away from your face. 
It comes out a little mumbled this time between kisses, but it comes out all the same. 
“Love you.”
He sighs into you—relief that mirrors your own. 
“I love you.”
It seems like the kind of thing that will never stop sounding perfect from his lips. 
A final deep kiss shortens into a series of smaller ones, and then he’s pulling away slowly, brushing the corner of your mouth affectionately. 
Both of you require a few deep breaths—a moment to let your sparkling eyes wildly chart each familiar curve and convex and shade and shadow of the other’s face—before either of you can speak. Spencer breaks the silence first. 
“I’m sorry.”
You frown, stirred from your brainless bliss by his unexpected apology. 
“For what?”
The fiery glow in his eyes dampens slightly. 
“For what I said at the bar.”
Oh.
That.
It feels like a lifetime away—memories seen through someone else’s eyes. Words like blows from a less familiar mouth. 
You look away. For a while, you’d forgotten about that. Ideally he wouldn’t have reminded you. 
At least he doesn’t make you look at him. He just strokes your hair, watching you examine the tiled counter. His voice is soft and soothing, like he’s appealing to a scared rabbit. Or maybe something angrier and with more teeth. 
“You’re not immature, or badly behaved, or thoughtless. I was having an emotional reaction, I got defensive, and I lashed out. It was unfair and unkind of me to throw those things back in your face when I know how much trust it takes for you to be vulnerable with me. There’s nothing I can say or do that will adequately make up for that, but I want you to understand that I didn’t say any of it because it was the truth. I said it because I didn’t understand how you were feeling and I was hurt. I was insecure and I acted juvenile. I am so, so sorry, honey. You don’t have to forgive me, but you do need to know that none of it is true.”
Once you bite your lip long enough to be sure you won’t cry again, you speak. 
“It’s okay,” you insist with a cheerfulness as natural as hard plastic, something in your chest twinging. “I was mean too. Like you said, we were both confused.”
“It is not. I made you cry.”
Sometimes you forget that he’s not like other people. He’ll never accept anything less than the barest truth. So you look back up at him and speak with a level of honesty that you hope satisfies him. 
“I forgive you. You didn’t mean it. And I have insurance because Derek said he and Emily would kick your ass if you’re mean to me again.”
You hear the sad humor in his voice. His hand runs up and down your back. 
“If I’m ever mean to you again, I personally invite you to kick my ass. And then let Derek and Emily have their turn.” He thumbs at your cheek, studying you in silence for a moment. “I can’t tell you how much I wish I could take it back.”
You stand up a little straighter. Spencer tracks you with his eyes, noting the way you smile slightly. 
“You’ll find a way to make it up to me.”
“I’ll do anything for you,” he admits, barely a whisper and the truth of it so heavy you can feel it too. 
But for tonight you can’t contend with more weight. 
“You know what you could do right now?”
The mischief in your tone is obvious, and he hesitates, like he’s not sure he wants to let you move on from this so quickly. But eventually he plays along, pressing his thumb into the dip of your back and speaks lowly, just as you’d hoped he would. 
“What’s that?”
You smile slyly. 
“You could kiss me again.”
“Hm… I don’t know, three times in one night? Sounds a little excessive.”
“Do you want to be forgiven or not?” You huff. He smiles lazily, already dipping his head to press his lips to yours. 
“I thought I was already forgiven.”
“Apologies can be retracted.”
“Ah.” His next words are mumbled as his lips ghost yours. “Well we wouldn’t want that.”
Spencer puts you out of your misery, not bothering to warm you up to it before he’s kissing you with a deep need. It’s still languid, and not hungry, exactly—it’s more like an aching, mind-numbing thirst. It’s all-consuming, overwhelming to have all of his burning focus pinpointed on you like this. Both hands come to cup your face and you wonder if he wants you in ways that he doesn’t entirely understand, just as you want him. You wonder if anything could possibly sate this desire to possess him completely and for him to possess you, to trade corporeal forms—or if it’s just something you’ll have to live with like a metaphysical itch you can’t scratch. As he forces you to tip your head back for him, using his height to his advantage, breathing deeply against you and attempting to push himself impossibly closer, you begin to think he understands exactly how you feel. 
As soon as you’d sensed he wanted it, your lips had parted for him. He knows he could have any part of you. He knows how eager you are to give yourself to him. You’ve done everything to prove it, and yet you’ve never needed him quite like you do ask he pushes off the counter and slowly backs you against the wall, protecting your head with a hand as the paintings rattle ever so slightly. You gasp into his mouth and he kisses you greedier still, but his hands don’t stray from your cheeks. 
Not until, that is, you hook your right leg around his left, and he catches it, fingers wrapping under the bend of your knee. 
Never in your life have you regretted picking jeans rather than a skirt more than you do right now. 
But to your disappointment, Spencer slows down to a halt—pulling his lips from yours like they’d been stuck by molasses until he’s far enough away to study you wildly, panting just as you are. His hair hangs over his smoldering eyes. He’s disheveled. It’s sexy. 
“What?” You whisper, voice surprisingly hoarse.
He looses a dry, abashed laugh. The flush he’s sporting is incredibly charming. 
“I’m supposed to be playing nice with you.”
Spencer says it like it’s a mild hindrance. Something frissons in your core. You smile a little wider as you continue to catch your breath, which seems to please him. 
“Playing nice?”
“Being gentle. I’m not supposed to push my favorite things against walls when they’re delicate.”
Your face heats at the way he speaks of you—if it weren’t Spencer, if you didn’t know he really doesn’t think of you as an object, you’d be pissed. But instead all you can think about is how good it feels when he calls you his. 
“According to who?”
His eyes dart between yours and then down to your lips several times before he averts them to the wall beside you with an intensity that could burn holes through the plaster. Is that how he looks at you?
“According to me. I think… god, you're going to hate me for this. But I think I need you to kick me out.”
You drop your leg at the same time as you do your heart. 
“What?”
“I know,” he says, over-apologetically, “I know, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let that escalate. But we can’t… do anything tonight.” Before you can protest, he rushes to explain himself. “It’s just that it’s been a long day. It’s been a long week, actually, and I doubt either of us have slept very much, and I think you’re really drained, and probably not thinking super clearly. I don’t think you’re in the best place for decision making.”
You look pointedly down to where he still has you pressed to the wall. 
“I think I’m in a great place.”
At that he steps back, but lets his hands find yours and pulls you away from the wall—just not quite as close as before. His nose bumps against yours as he speaks low and sweet. 
“I understand that you want me to stay right now. But it’s not a good idea to associate fighting with physical pleasure. That can set some really dangerous patterns.”
“We’re not fighting,” you plead, matching his tone as you look up at him with big eyes. His fingers lace with yours. 
“You’re right. Maybe fighting was the wrong word. But we had some pretty intense conversations today, didn’t we?”
Reluctantly you nod. 
“Right,” he agrees. “Same premise. We need to be able to have those conversations without getting distracted.”
In a last ditch attempt to get him to change his mind, you give him your best approximation of the imploring, wide-eyed gaze he sometimes uses on you. Something not entirely smile and not entirely smirk twists the corners of his mouth. When he ducks down to kiss you quickly, you reciprocate, but you lack the enthusiasm of earlier. 
“Hey.” 
“Hm,” you respond, dejectedly. 
“Don’t get all grumpy because I don’t put out.”
That puts a disgruntled little smile on your face as he probably knew it would. 
“I guess you just gave it up easy to all those other women.”
He grabs your chin and gives you a final peck. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never been with other women.”
“Mhm,” you grumble good-naturedly, pushing away from him and going to the door to undo the deadbolt. “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”
“Wow. I really must have overstayed my welcome if that’s the goodbye I get.”
You turn back around, brows raised. 
“Oh, I was prepared to be very welcoming. This is your doing.”
“Uh-huh. Come here.”
Happily you skitter back across the few feet of wooden flooring and wrap your arms tightly around him one more time, pressing your cheek to his chest. He’s ready, winding his arms over yours and rubbing your back. It’s eerily similar, you realize as he presses his face into the concave of your shoulder, to when he’d left on that most recent case. 
But at the same time—everything’s different. 
And you won’t make the same mistake twice. 
“Hey,” you smile, resting your head on his shoulder. Spencer pulls back to look at you, a similar grin on his face. 
“Hey what?”
“I remembered what I was gonna say.”
The grin widens. He knows exactly what you’re talking about. 
“Tell me.”
“I was going to tell you that I love you. And—I hope you’re not one of those people who’s uncomfortable being told that often. Because if that’s the case I’m really going to annoy you.”
“I’m not that kind of person,” he assures. “Tell me as often as you can.”
“But you should say it back. It’s more polite that way.”
“I love you,” he murmurs, in a voice more serious than your teasing tones had been but still soft and sweet around the edges. “You know, people talk about love as if it’s completely irrational and illogical. But with you… I think the world actually makes more sense than it used to. I understand things I never did before. You’ve taught me a lot.”
It’s like a lightshow in your stomach. You wonder if he has any idea the effect his casual musings have on you.
“You already knew everything.”
“Not everything,” Spencer whispers. “Not about the things that matter.”
And you’re fresh out of teases. All you can do is look up at him with big eyes again, in awe of the fact that you get to keep him after all. 
“Will you text me when you get home?” You request, voice reverent in the wake of an admission you could never hope to top. 
“I will. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
You nod, because it doesn’t even matter if you had other plans tomorrow. They’re as good as cancelled. 
Spencer kisses your cheek, and you get the sense that things are still being left unfinished. There’s an unresolved tension that you can’t shake, even after all the apologies and kisses and sweet words. Still, he made a point with his talk about not mixing argument with pleasure, and you’d like to respect those wishes because you respect him—even if every atom of your being shakes with desire to keep him locked in your bedroom, hidden away from the world together, for as long as you can possibly manage. 
Eventually, you loosen your hold, and you let him go. He lingers at the door, hands in his pockets, just watching you and mirroring your small smile as you hold onto the counter with an iron grip to keep yourself in check. After he finally peels his gaze away from yours and silently closes the door behind him, you stand there, staring at the wood for at least a minute.
Once you manage to shake yourself from your revery with a deep breath, you grab your glass from earlier and stand in front of the sink, watching it fill with a white jet of water. It’d be a shame to admit it to him, but maybe Spencer is right. Maybe you do need time to emotionally digest today. After all—that was technically your first argument. It seems to have left you sort of wound up. Not in a bad way, per se—maybe you just need to take a shower, let the hot water roll over your shoulders and wash away the frenetic energy that clings to you. 
Still, something tells you that you won’t be getting much sleep tonight, even if you do take the world’s longest shower. You’re simply too high-strung. You wonder if having Spencer here would fix that or make it worse. But ultimately, he’d made the call that it was a bad idea for him to stay, and you’re generally inclined to trust his judgement. 
The thought makes you laugh into your cup as you drink. Even after the debacle that was the past week, you trust him to know what he’s doing. Maybe you need to rethink that, at least temporarily, until he’s had a chance to redeem himself. 
Just then, your front door is opening with absolutely zero warning and slamming shut again before you can finish whipping around. Your heart threatens to choke you and you almost drop your glass, clutching your chest. 
“Jesus, you—”
But the words die in your throat as Spencer storms toward you, shrugging his coat off with a white-hot chill in his eyes. It’s enough to freeze you in place, heart drumming against the confines of your ribs. 
“You really need to start locking that door,” he breathes, tossing his jacket on the counter before grabbing your face and crashing his lips into yours, palms pressed to your jaw and fingers pushing into your hair. You stand there, hands hovering in air before you gain the wherewithal to blindly set the glass down behind you. Your heart is pounding as you immediately submit to the kiss, whining softly against his lips and cautiously seeking stability in the fabric of his shirt. Spencer pulls away only briefly, allowing you to gasp for much-needed air. His brown eyes are like molten gold on you, pupils blown wide and wild as he scans your face, taking heavy breaths of his own. “Anyone could just walk in.”
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starreo · 2 days
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pro hero! katsuki bakugo drabble .
being icky has never been hotter. includes insecurity on katsuki's side, fem! reader p in v in the last paragraph lol, and adult themes, so mdni!!
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when he's just started dating you, katsuki feels so scared of holding your hand. he feels that if the sweat is icky to him, then it'll be icky to you. and for all katsuki is, he will never want you, out of everyone to think he's 'icky'.
so he shoves them in his deep pockets, trying to wipe off the sweat, hoping, maybe by the end of the date, he might be able to. but it doesn't help. the silk pockets make it worse and his hands are sweatier than before. so he just decides to grab you by your waist as he leads you back to your door.
that night katsuki goes home, happy about your present, but nervous about your future. what if he holds your hand on the next date? and what if you hate how wet it feels. what if he can just never touch you?
however, all of the silly questions in his silly head crumble, when you pout and complain about how the winter dries up your hands so much. and as he's about to make some comment, to mask up his insecurity, you grab his hands in yours. sheepishly murmuring about how he's so lucky to have a natural moisturizer, which keeps his hands so soft all the goddamn while!
and his breath hitches, and his heart beats louder.
ever since then, katsuki makes sure to hold your hand no matter what the two of you are doing. and each time he reaches out to grab it, he smiles, at his past self, who was worrying so much.
because now he doesn't just get to hold your hand out on dates to help you cross the road. he holds your hand on the table, when the two of you are eating at a fancy restaurant. he holds your hand in front of your family, grinning as your parents tease him about not being able to keep his hands off of you.
he holds your hand against the pillows, when his cock is buried deep inside your snug walls. intertwining his fingers with yours as he thrusts in and out of you, slow, but deep. his other hand caressing your bottom lip, as his finger hooks the corner of your gasping mouth, drool slipping out of it. katsuki chuckles as his fingers make contact with the sticky substance, who knew being icky could be this hot?
i come back and this is the first thing i write???? ALSO lolll all the confidence that i had at first about writing longer stuff flew away like a seagull with a bag of cheetos. idk why but recently I've been so obsessed with mha again.....ugh.
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© starreo 2024. do not copy, translate or repost .
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monstersflashlight · 2 days
Note
I loved Gym Slut so much omg, the open ended ness is amazing but drives me crazy, it’s my Roman Empire omg.
Orcs >>
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As per VERY POPULAR request, here it is the third part of the Gym Slut series. Hope is everything y’all wanted, I got all the anon requests together to make it easier for all of us to find it.
part 1 || part 2
Make it fit
Orc x fem!human || dirty talk, size kink, humiliation, exhibitionism, knotting, cum play
You had a cold and couldn’t go to the gym for a few days, which sucked but it also was great because now your pussy wasn’t sore anymore, and you hoped to have some freaky sex with your gym-crush again. But you are in no luck. There’s too many people at the gym today. Your favorite spot is taken, the new dudes are all over and the strong ladies are looking at you like you are less. You aren’t having fun at all.
Even the sight of your favorite orc is not making your inside twist and turn today. You hate when there’s so many people, you come extra early just to be able to be alone there. Well, mostly alone. You wanted to be alone with him.
Your gym-bro orc looks at you when you pass by, a tentative smile on his lips. You try to smile back, but you are sure it looks like a grimace. You try to work out for a few more minutes, but when a big dude approaches you and tries to flirt you can’t hide your annoyance. But the dude doesn’t catch up, fucking stupid. You are about to tell him to fuck off when a big shadow appears behind you.
“Fuck off,” the orc says. He growls at the end and making the human dude go away as fast as possible, he even trips on his way and you chuckle at him. “Do you want to work out with me? They won’t bother you then.” There’s a spark of danger in his voice, and something you don’t want to identify, but sounds a lot like jealousy. But that can’t be, you fucked twice, it’s not like he likes you or something. You don’t want to think about it, too scared to get hopeful over a couple fucks at the gym.
“Yeah, sure. That’d be great,” you muster. You follow him to the leg press. He’s lifting an insane amount of weight, probably trice the amount you lift, and that makes you hot and bothered. Your body reacts instantly, your nipples standing to attention and your panties (yes, today you did wear panties) start to get wet. He realized as soon as he looks at you, a cruel and twisted smile playing on his lips.
You two move from one machine to the next. He adjusts the weights perfectly for you, you don’t even know how he knows it. He gets the perfect weight in every single machine, which means he’s been observing you as much as you’ve been observing him. That fills you with some sort of anticipation. Once again, shutting down the sparks of hope inside your chest. Sex is sex, doesn’t have to mean anything else. It doesn’t mean anything else for him. But for you… You aren’t ready to think about it.
When you get to do sit-ups, a weird dude a few meters away keeps staring at you, making you uncomfortable. You hug yourself to hide your pointy nipples. Your orc realizes that too, leaning into your space and pinching them, making you moan loudly and cover your mouth with a slap, embarrassed about your reaction. You look frantically around, the dude smirks at you, adjusting himself. You blush hard, frowning at the orc who just smiles back at you. He’s such a little shit.
He does it again, and again. Every change he gets he pinches your nipples and makes you shudder, tiny groans escaping. And at some point when you are leaning down to grab the weights he gropes your ass, parting your ass cheeks shamelessly, massaging the globes with abandon. Next rep, he slaps your ass hard. The slap sounds so loud that everyone close by turns around and looks at you two. They look scandalized, as you blush furiously, and your pussy quivers. He smirks at you, embarrassment and humiliation filling you. You are sure there’s a dark spot in your crotch area because of how wet you are at that point.
“You are the worst gym companion I’ve ever had,” you complain. But you don’t get away from him, watching him lift and staring as his round ass. That’s a great ass.
He turns to look at you, and with a nonchalant voice he says: “Don’t lie to me, slut. I can smell your arousal, I know you are soaked right now. Your nipples are so hard I can see them clearly. Everyone can. And you like that, don’t you? You like to be stared at, to be seen as the little slut you are for me.” The intensity in the last part has you panting. He’s right, you are so turned on with everything that has happened that you want to get out of there, you need him to fill you again. You need his dick. ASAP.
You stare as he approaches you. “Can we get out of here?” You murmur, embarrassed to be the one asking him this time. He crowds your space, his body hiding you from everyone’s view completely.
“Are you that needy? Are you so turned on that you have to come soon? Maybe I want to make you cum right here, for everyone to see. You’d like that, right?” You moan at his words, embarrassed beyond belief, looking around trying to see if someone is paying attention. Doesn’t look like it, but the idea that they might be someone listening is enough to make you shiver.
He presses against your body, so close that not even a needle could fit between your bodies. His hands find your boobs, and he gropes you right there. You moan again, and he covers your mouth with his big hand, his other hand going to your crotch, palming your soaking pussy through your clothes and making you groan loudly.
You are sure he can feel how wet you are, and your suspicions meet when he says: “You are dripping, being groped and slapped in public made you this wet? Maybe you are even more of a whore than I thought.” You groan again, his finger pressing over your clit, the sound muffled by his hand. “Let’s go.” He takes his hands out and grabbing you by the waist when he feels you missing a step, your knees weak.
He drags you to the locker rooms and tells you to grab your stuff and meet him outside. You agree, grabbing everything as fast as you can and walking outside with your thighs as close as you can, trying to get some friction in your needy cunt. When you see him already waiting for you outside, you bite your lip, expectantly. He grabs your face between his big hands and leans down to kiss you senseless. Your hands go around his neck and he picks you up effortlessly, walking somewhere with you wrapped around him. His dick feels giant under you. You make out like teenagers until he presses you against a metal surface.
“Get in.” He tells you, and you obey, too needy to play games with him.
As soon as both of you are inside his car, he grabs you and sits you over his lap, tearing your leggings to get access to your pussy. He pushes your shirt down, exposing your tits to his hungry eyes. Your messy clothes are all over the place, and the car is not precisely the best place, but you are so hot for him that you wouldn’t even care if there was someone watching from another car. The windows of the car foggy since he started touching you. You bet people outside could see the car moving, there was no way people wouldn’t know that you two were fucking inside.
He fingers you messily, your pussy soaked to the point that his fingers make a filthy sound in every thrust. He’s kissing your tits, making all kinds of grunts and groans, elevating your arousal by a thousand. You grab his hair and pull, making him growl and bite down on your nipple, making some more juices drip around his fingers.
He finger fucks you like that, not even touching your clit but getting you so hot you start to plead him to fuck you, soon, fast, hard. He complies, his hard dick pushing inside of you in one thrust, stretching you so wide you cry out. He smirks at your reaction, grabbing your hips and moving you up and down.
“You practiced. You didn’t take my cock this easy last time.” You blush, trying to hide your face on his neck, but he pulls your head back by your hair, the sparks of pain making you moan. “You did, didn’t you?” You nod, your mouth open and some drool escaping, the pleasure so intense that your brain is shutting down.
He keeps fucking you, calling you dirty names and flicking your clit every once in a while, but he doesn’t let you come. Every time you are close, he slows down. That realization made you hotter. Tears are running down your face as he fucks you brutally, when you feel something big resting against your pussy, right outside your entrance and trying to breach inside.
“What’s that?” You choke out, alarmed.
He smirks at you and answers: “My knot.” You throw your head back and groan. You didn’t know orcs had knots, you didn’t know if you could take a knot. He was so far inside, you were so stretched already, there was no way something that big could fit.
“That’s not going to fit.” You told him, your voice sounded strained, his hands still moving you up and down his shaft, your boobies bouncing.
“I’ll make it fit. And you’ll take it, like a good little slut.” He punctuates each word with a punishing thrust. You groan as he moves your hips to create friction between your bodies, pushing you down on his knot, trying to get it inside. You cry out when your body gives in to the invasion, a bit of his knot entering you. “You love this, don’t you, little slut? You love being so full you can’t even talk. You can’t even move. You are just a toy for me to fuck, a pretty human fleshlight for my monster cock.” He keeps talking, telling you all the filthy things that cross your mind as your brain starts to flutter, your pussy contracting around his knot. Too big. Too full.
He thrust the rest of the knot inside of you as he growls, the first splash of his cum hitting your cervix and making you cum right along with him. He moves your hips in circles, grinding your clit against his pubic bone as he keeps coming, and coming, and coming. And you do too, the sensation of being fucked so fully making your mind go blank and your soul leaves your body with a series of orgasms that leave you breathless. You can’t even groan or moan anymore, your mouth parted in a silent scream as you keep coming and he keeps filling you to the brim.
You don’t know how long you two remain like that, but when you came back to your senses, he asks you softly: “Are you okay?” His question meet you with a sudden realization.
“You like me.” You blurt out, completely surprised. He protected you today, he was possessive of you. He scared away all the creepy dudes, and even when he humiliated you, making you groan and moan in front of people, groping you publicly, he was the only allowed to touch today.
“No. I do not.” He tries to argue, but the blush that creeps up his face is telling. You smile at him, big and smug.
“Yes, yes you do. You blushed. You are all mean and big and dominating, but you like me.” You repeat, making him all flustered. He hides his face in your neck and bites lightly, his tusks caressing your skin in the best way.
After a few seconds, he looks up, meeting your eyes with a sudden vulnerability. “Yes, okay? I do like you. I like that you are a constant in my messy life. And I like to see your hot body and bright smile every morning when I get here. And, most of all, I love how you take my knot like a good little slut for me.” At that last remark, you are the one blushing, your pussy twitching and his dick shooting more cum into you as a response.
“I like you, too.” You whisper, almost too low, but he catches it either way.
“I know.” His dick twitches inside of you, his knot still inside of you. “Maybe… Maybe next time we can see each other outside gym clothes.”
“You’ve already seen me naked,” you joke. You try not to move too much, the pressure inside your pussy still making you want to grind against him.
“Not that. I mean like… like a date.” He whispers, blushing bright green again, making you giggle.
“You want a date with me?” You say as you feel his knot slip out and a gush of cum goes with it, making a complete mess off his pants. Your pussy looking decadent against his soft green dick, completely covered in cum. “Ugh, gross.”
He ignores your remark as he touches your pussy again, taking some of the leaking cum and pushing it back again, smirking at your whorish groan. “Don’t get me wrong, I also want to fuck you brainless again and fill you until you are overflowing.” He pushes more cum inside your quivering pussy. “Maybe slap your pussy to see how much it takes for you to come just like that.” He does just that, slaps your pussy making a wet sound resonate inside the car. You blush. “Mmmmm, so many possibilities.” He takes his hand, coated by his cum and your juices and takes it to your face. “Lick.” He orders. You do just that, moaning against his fingers. “But maybe I can do that in a bed, after a nice dinner?” He continues to talk like you aren’t deep throating his fingers like the slut you are. He sounds hopeful.
You take his hand away, licking the last remains as you tell him: “Yeah. I’d like that.”
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shaisuki · 1 day
Text
𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗦𝗘 𝗘𝗡𝗗𝗦
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ft. bully! gojo satoru and geto suguru
content warnings college au, heavy bullying, gaslighting, noncon, dubcon, implied sexual assault, allusions to depression/suicide, alcohol consumption, drinking, implied drugging, fatphobia, overdosing, naoya zen'in is an asshole, humiliation, threats, minor oc character. dead dove do not eat.
notes this might come as disappointing since some of you wanting revenge what this two idiots had done to reader. their are some matters that i think is too complicated and impossible so i came with this way as the breaking point where reader starts to retaliate/plan her revenge. will get to it later and to that anon, who asked for the revenge, i will get once i start to finish this one up. please read the warnings, i don't want someone bitching in the comments telling me that the contents above is uncool. it truly is not cool. that's why it have warnings. it is on a fictional context. do read the warnings before continuing. also do let me know of what you think of this chapter.
read part one, here. two here.
synopsis you let them take and take what they can from you. you were a nobody after all but everybody have their breaking point.
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the world is a blur to you. colors of red and blue dances in your vision while voices whispers to you. what's happening? you can't move. it's like your body were made of lead. you can't understand what they were saying. multiple faces stares at you, are you dead? is this what you see when people surround you while they lower your casket. is it? you hope it was, cause you didn't plan on living anymore. there's nothing worth moving forward and the world around you turns black.
there's a beep and then silence. you hear before you see and when you opened your eyes, all you can see is a bright light above you. it took you minutes to adjust your vision and realize where you are. you're in a hospital. laying on a bed and you started to get irritated at your oxygen mask. you tug at it. getting frustrated why it keeps coming back at you before someone put their hand on it. completely removing it and there you breath. your sight darted to the hand who helped you until your sight travels to his arms and then to his face. a brief recognition flashes through you.
“nanami?” you call his name unsure but you know it was definitely him. it was hard to mistake him for someone. there's his blonde hair, neatly parted. his pristine beige sweater paired a dark colored trouser, not a crinkle in sight and his signature silver watch in his wrist. you met him once at the literature club and decided you were going to be there too not until it changed due to some circumstances. his lips parted but before he can speak, a cheery voice interrupted him.
“she's awake!?” said haibara, you also knew him since he and nanami were always together. seeing your confused state, his voice died down. “what happened?” you asked them and they exchanged looks before haibara answers you.
“we found you passed out in the lawn. thought you were drunk but you weren't breathing.” haibara's voice was soft while he slowly breaks down the reason why you ended up here.
a doctor comes inside to your room before haibara can finish. you took note of her pristine white coat with her surname embroidered on it. clicking her pen and whipping out her clipboard she pulled out of nowhere. you were distracted by it. the doctor's eyes is on you now and you began to frown.
the doctor coughs clearing her throat before speaking. “hello, ms. (y/n). i'm glad you're awake now.” noticing your confused expression she pauses began answering the question. “to answer your question you were unconscious for two days and is brought for possible assault. we need your con—”
“no!”
“ms. it would help for you t—”
“you heard me!? i said no!” you scream at the doctor and your tears appeared in your eyes. you didn't realize you were screaming. nanami and haibara stand there in silence but the looks on their face said otherwise. concern painted in their faces and the doctor bows before leaving. looking at the men inside in your room to call her if you need anything.
cause if they would test you, they would find the remains of their sperm inside you and then report? who will believe you? it would be buried like the case of another girls like you who were too afraid nor fight their abusers. you don't find the point of that. they would twist the words out of you. it was easy to believe than you.
you curled up in bed and did the next thing you can. cry. now, you're in here and the events before this plays in your head in repeat.
“f-fuck”
satoru curses out while suguru bites your ear. your body like jello as they spilled their load for the nth that day. both of them lowered your body after fucking your brains out. warm up, they say. you shiver as you feel their cum running down your thighs. feeling disgusted as it began to stick after being exposed to the air. you grab the wipes but suguru stopped you, grabbing it from your hands and cleaning you up. fixing your skirt in the meantime.
“worth every penny.” suguru mutters. staring at the new clothes they bought for you. a baby blue corseted puff-sleeved, square neck top matched with a black skirt that rests on your mid thigh is what they forced you to wear. it feels tight. intentionally buying it one size smaller than you usually wore and it more feel you like a stuffed sausage rather a comfortable piece of clothing. you can't say no to what they wanted. you're a bit of grateful that they allowed you to wear your white sneakers rather than those kitten heels that would put your feet in blisters.
satoru's fingers brushes through the expanse of your exposed flesh. playing with the small bow in your top. sighing, “suguru, can we have more with (y/n)-chan?” his best friend chuckles at him. “idiot, we're already running late, after that we can.” satoru pouts. “tch, party pooper.” he ignores gojo and moves his attention to you.
“smile, this is your first real party. you're going to enjoy this.” suguru lifts your chin up with his finger and you obediently nodded. “ditch and you know what will happen.” he warns.
it was a bad idea. the moment you stood in the front door. the party was already in motion. you can hear the people inside shouting profanities and booming music mixed with already drunk frat members and student bodies. this was never really your crowd and when you were shoved inside with gojo and geto you were done and you already felt like crying. you look at the duo in front of you. they were already engaged in conversation with the other people here.
“gojo, you son of a bitch. you fucking came.” a guy hollered in the side and you see more of his features as he gets nearer. a snarl in his face with multiple piercings in his ear. a hair dyed blonde with green accents.
“ah, zen’in. wouldn't missed this just i could wipe that smirk off your face.” gojo mocks him and before the guy whom gojo called zen’in darts his sight to you. he raises a brow. “you two in fat bitches now?” pointing at you with hand cupping a plastic cup. gojo scoffs. “none of your business, zen'in.” glaring at him but he can't see that gojo's looking at him with dark glasses in the way. “then you two wouldn't mind me using her.” he suggested and suguru gaze darkens at him. “fuck off, naoya.” almost growling at naoya and the latter raises his hand in mock defeat before finding shit he could entertain himself with.
suguru scowls after naoya left, he looks at you like you just turned his mood sour. “you're an embarrassment.” he says and you bit your lip. keeping the tears at bay and you don't really want to embarrass yourself more at this party. “hey, hey suguru.” gojo taps his shoulder. “let loose, don't naoya get to you.” satoru glances at you. his blue eyes peering in his glasses. “you're right.” his stare cold at you. “find a seat, (y/n). you're embarrassing us now with you around.” you nod and you find yourself in a vacant corner. near to those already wasted or just plain chilling in the couch in front of you.
what did you expect? that were all sex talk or when they're in good mood. all those praise and compliments are just enough to feel you good about yourself for a bit and then they'll come destroying it. you stare at the view through the window. the night's particularly beautiful and peaceful except the place you're in and you're already missing the comfort of your bed.
you take a sip from your cup. a girl gave it you earlier saying that it's a special concoction that's only made at this parties. unsure you took it. not wanting to show ungratefulness to someone whose only been polite to you and she seems nice. you cringe slightly at the taste and the burning of the liquid as it flows down your throat. coughing you bring down the cup, not used to drinking.
your first time being a party, your eyes wander how your peers lost their selves in the influence of alcohol. some where dancing and mingling. talking like they were friends and you caught of others taking their business upstairs. you were kind of jealous how everyone are the life of the party and you sit here in your misery. you continue to observe everyone and you caught gojo. it's impossible to miss his tall stature and his white hair standing in the crowd. a petite woman is linked to him. her thin arms are wrapped around his neck and it was clear what they were doing. there they stood in the crowd. kissing.
“satoru.” gojo was taking a swig of his drink when a girl approached him. calling his name like they were lovers but it was more like an ex-fling. never had a relationship with her. she was only a temporary fun. “ah, sar—ah, sayuri.” he almost curses at himself. sayuri playfully pouts at him and there it is, the batting of eyelashes. “that's mean, satoru. you already forgot me.” her lips puckers before placing a hand in his chest. if this was a another party of gojo and he really liked this girl. he would have taken her upstairs. he caught you in the corner. you were like a child in awe at the people in this house. gojo almost chuckles at your cute antics but suppressed it and then a cruel idea pops in his mind. “missed me?” he asks sayuri and there was no answer needed as he crashes his lips to sayuri. his sight never leaving yours and when you caught him. he watch as your eyes widens, you lower your head in embarrassment before chugging that drink in your cup in one swig. he smirks in the kiss as he watches you wiped your tears away. he always liked making you cry.
you should have ditched this stupid party, even it means getting punished by those again. you were hurt. they always like to torture you. listen as they tell you how worthless and unlovable you are while they keep girls who are clearly not you by their side. those girls were perfectly fit for them to be seen in public and you were there for them to humiliate you. with your head lowered, you stifled a sob. wiping your tears with your hands shaking. they kept flowing and you kept messily wiping them and with that you slowly made your way outside. discreetly making your way through the door and you almost laugh. you were a nobody. you're not made for pretty things and this goddamn outfit you wore only added to your misery. you never felt beautiful and it looks ugly on you. wrapped a sausage with a different and it will still look the same.
no one noticed you leaving except for suguru's watchful gaze.
suguru finds his friend making out with a girl he definitely doesn't remember. suguru slaps his back and satoru broke the kiss. wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and ignores the girl he was just making out seconds ago. suguru points the door where you left earlier. you're really looking for trouble and with that they left following you.
sayuri was stunned being shoved aside again. she was angry. how the fuck did you get those two's attention especially gojo's? she's beautiful. she's thin. academically excelling and you, a fat nobody bitch easily made those two fall for you. she knows they were just playing at you and sayuri could take it but being shoved again by satoru isn't what she expected tonight. she's going to be satoru's bride. it was decided from the start and satoru knows it. their fathers friends since their college days had made a decision to marry their son and daughter before they were even born and she did everything she can just to have satoru's attention but why can't she even get to look at her without her trying. it's your fault. it's your fucking fault! you deserve to die. you're fucking stupid for accepting that drink like you're a fucking saint and now, maybe you'll rethink your choices of making those your own and satoru will only have his eyes for her and only her.
weird. why are your hands sweating? it's cold. freezing cold. you know this temperature at night is normal but why are you freezing cold. hah, your vision's starting to get funny too. where there always stars in the sky? ahh, i want to go home. i wonder if akira's still awake. i didn't told her that i was going away tonight. my eyes hurt. you were crying. this was your thoughts as you walked away.
it was to easy to catch you with their long strides. satoru grabs your flabby arm angrily. “we told you, you don't leave without us. do you really want to get punished, (y/n)-chan?” his voice snarky as he digs his nails in your arms. it hurts. it really must really hurt but you're suddenly numb to feel anything. you just stare at him in confusion and then you hear voices. they were calling them to get back.
gojo scowls at them. your knees buckled and you sat in the ground. geto tsked. “we're going back to you later.” he says and they left you there and there were loud cheers. you lay there in the ground. numb and your vision fades away.
you blinked as you stare in the nothingness. that's what you last remembered. they left you there and you hoped you died. you can't take another bullshit of what they put you through. the tears continuously flows from your eyes and your blanket is wet with tears. haibara puts a comforting hand in your shoulder and you bursted crying again. this was the real kindness you felt since the accident. they didn't blame you. they only stayed and made sure you were resting enough. stranger they maybe or an acquaintance. you would never forget this kindness from them.
days. nights. you stayed in the hospital until you were cleared. you made nothing of what happened to you. putting it in the records as an allergic reaction in which the hospital agreed. just like that even when you're in the brink of death of what happened to you. if you took the procedure for assault. they would be guilty but it was days old now and bruises are left in your skin as nothing but reminders of the humiliation of what they did to you.
for now, you're going to cry. cry until there's nothing left to cry for.
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satorusugurugurl · 3 days
Note
Can i please request an experienced reader taking the virginity of gojo, geto, nanami, and sukuna (modern au) please? I really love your writing and all the brainrot it gives me ☺️ happy feel good friday ! ❤️
Cherry Popper!
Summary: You pop the cherries of some of the hottest men from JJK!
Characters: Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, Nanami Kento, Ryomen Sukuna (Modern AU)
Word count: 9,020
Warnings: smut, language, fingering, p in v, protected/unprotected sex, horny thoughts
A/N: Nonnie, I hope you have an amazing day. This prompt had me squirming! *feral barking*
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Gojo Satoru:
Dating the Gojo Satoru was like a dream come true. Not only was the man hot, and he spoiled you rotten, and he loved you endlessly. Not a day went by that you doubted his love for you. But you did notice something was wrong with him when things started to get a little more intimate in the bedroom. 
One night, you were watching Netflix when he leaned over to kiss you, and you reciprocated. That kiss turned into another kiss before it was a full-blown make-out session that ended with you on top of him, straddling his hips; his erection was rubbing against your clothed pussy perfectly. Both your palms lay flat against his chest as you tilted your head back, rolling your hips back and forth, your clit rubbing over the seam in your pants perfectly. 
You were getting lost in the pleasure; the feeling of his cock twitching and becoming fully erect had you eager for more. He looked so fucked, lips slightly parted, cheeks flushed a deep shade of red, and those beautiful eyes slowly widened as you placed both his hands on your breasts. His long fingers twitched, eager to squeeze and massage the super-soft flesh of your chest. Instead of giving in to his carnal desires, he sits up, leaving his hands on your breasts as he takes a deep breath.
“Toru?” Your boyfriend’s eyes roll back at the sultry tone of your voice. “What’s wrong?”
His eyes glance around the room, avoiding yours entirely. “Uhm, Before we go any further, you should know something.” His tongue darts out, sliding over his kiss-swollen lips, wetting them. 
Oh, he was serious. You goofball of a boyfriend was being serious. All horny thoughts went to the back of your mind as you focused all of your attention on him. 
“What’s wrong, baby?” 
The different scenarios he might want to discuss with you flow through your head. Did he have an STD? Was he not ready to take it to the next step? Or did he not see you sexually appealing? The scenarios of what could happen in the next couple of minutes were endless.
“Uhm, well, I've noticed things in our relationship have progressed.” His hands gently squeeze your breasts to emphasize his point. “like how you’re straddling my hips and grinding against my cock. But before we take it further, you have the right to know.”
“Ah~” he gives your tits another squeeze, “know what?” 
“I-I’m uhm—” he uses your breasts like a stress ball, giving them a final squeeze before he lets out a harsh breath. “I’m a virgin.” 
A 404 error message displays in your mind; you blink, look away, and look back at Gojo before repeating the process. As if doing so will restart your brain. Because there is no way I’m a virgin just left his mouth.
“You’re a virgin?” 
“God, why does it sound worse when coming out of your mouth?”
“You're a virgin?”
“Repeating it isn’t going to change the fact that, yes, I am a virgin.” 
His cock is as soft as a marshmallow against you. You realize this might not be the best conversation while you’re on top of him. So, despite his sounds of protest, you crawl off his lap and sit on your knees across from him. 
There was a lot you wanted to talk with him about before you took the next step. “Okay, were you uncomfortable with how things were moving? Is that why—” you nod your head towards his crotch, “you aren’t hard anymore?” Anyone looking in on your conversation would’ve thought you just told Satoru you had run over his puppy.
“No, I’m not uncomfortable, I swear! I just— got in my head, and I realized that I hadn’t told you about still owning my V-card.” He lets out a nervous chuckle. “I just didn’t want things to get hot and heavy  for me to cum too soon and leave you feeling unsatisfied?” 
Not once in the history of your relationship with him had Gojo left you unsatisfied, so there were no worries. You did have to worry about the feral need in your chest. Knowing that he was a virgin and you were the experienced one had you not even concerned about your pleasure. Your boyfriend’s bottom lips stuck out in a pout as he looked you over. Satoru contemplates if he should’ve told you this or not. Why do people make such a big deal over their virginity anyway?
With a far-out look in his eyes, Gojo doesn't even see you coming. One second, you're sitting across from him; the next, he's being shoved back, and his shorts are tugged down. His soft cock twitched as you wrapped your hands around him and gave him a couple of strokes. 
“Fuuck, baby, what are you? Nngh!” his eyes widened, tears pricking his eyes as you took him into your mouth with a happy hum. “Oooh—ooh—haah~!” his fingers interlace through your hair, gently tugging at it. “Well fuck~ if I knew tellin’ y-yo-oooh fuck~!” Satoru clenched his teeth as you bobbed up and down, “Tellin’ you I was a virgin would get you to suck my dick~ would have told you sooner~!”
You hummed, pulling off of his erect cock, licking at the spit coating your lips. “I'm doing it to get you nice and hard~ because I’m going to fuck your brains out~” The declaration had Satoru twitching in your hand.
He was more than to have to fuck him, and he’s suddenly wishing it was your pussy wrapped around him rather than your mouth. But the nerves got the better of him, and he's ninety-nine percent sure that if you were to try jumping on top of him, he'd go soft again. Out of the two of you, you knew what you were doing, so it was better to let you do your thing.
And your thing was fucking torture.
You were sucking the life out of his cock, but every time he thought he would cum down your throat, you would pull away, edging him. It was fun at first, being almost at the edge of blissful pleasure to have it yanked away. But now that this has happened nearly five different times, it wasn't as fun anymore.
Satoru’s eyes flooded with tears as he fisted his hands into the sheets with a groan. “C- can't take it anymore!” Your throat was so warm and wet, but he wanted more; he needed you in the purest, rawest way he could. “Baby, fuck please I’m so hard it fucking hurts!” He wasn't lying about that; his cock was throbbing hard, tip leaking pre-cum. 
“Yeah~ you ready for me to pop that cherry?” Satoru laughs, eyebrows furrowing as he nods. 
“Say it however you want; I don’t care. Just please fuck me.” 
Watching you sit back and strip down had his cock twitching even harder. His eyes rake over your skin, taking in how pretty your tits are, how slick it is coating your inner thighs. You look tameless as you straddle his hips, your wet cunt inches from his dick. Kneeling above him, your fingers gently maneuver the head of his cock against your wet and tight entrance.
Just as you line yourself up, Satoru grabs your hips with both of his hands, his breath shaking as he exhales. Wait, it wasn’t just his fingers; his whole body was shaking. Did he want to do this?
“Toru?” Pulling your gaze from where your bodies are nearly connected, you look into his eyes, finding a man not overwhelmed by nerves but by pure horny intent. “Oooh.”
His cheeks are flushed, his eyes dark as he breathes heavily. You may have looked tameless to him, but to you, the man is fucking feral. It has you feeling things, so many things. Things that have you smirking as you grab him by the back of the head, yanking him towards your mouth in a heated kiss of tongue and moans. Satoru gently bucks his hips as he feels your pussy throb over the head of his cock. 
“M’ gonna fuck you, Toru~ ready?”
“S-So fuck—ah!” He rocks back as you start sliding your pussy down his cock. “Haah! Oh god.” His cerulean eyes dart towards his cock, where you both are connected. “O-Oh my god, oh my god, I’m inside you,” 
“Yeah~? Does it feel good~?” 
“Fuck! Fuuuck, fuck, fuck.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” You giggle as you grip his broad shoulders, lowering yourself entirely down on his cock until he’s balls deep inside of you. “Mhmm~ congratulations, you’re no longer a virgin. You feel so good inside of me~.”
His dick twitches against your tight walls as Satoru gently grips your hips. “It’s bad enough that I’m close to blowing my load from you just lowering yourself down. B-But when you talk like that, I feel like I could cum untouched. S-So maybe save that for when I’m not freshly devirginized.” His pleas are heard, and you decide not to say anything remotely close to that. Instead, you pull yourself up before slamming back down on his cock. “HAAH! Oh fuck!”
You set a slow pace of bouncing up and down his shaft while gripping his shoulders for support. Satoru watches your perfect body bouncing and rocking against him. His hand trail lower, groping the fat of your ass, squeezing it firmly as you continue to fuck him. You look so pretty, your head tilted back and your bottom lip between your teeth as you lose yourself in the pleasure. 
Seeing you so into it made him so close to the edge that he knew he would not last long. “Fuck~ fuck~ you’re so wet, so tight.” He groans out, dropping his forehead to rest on your shoulder. “I’m not gonna last long, sweetheart, fuck sorry.” Hearing that only had your hips moving faster and harder, causing him to grip your ass to ground himself. “Baby, please, please, I’ll cum too soon.” One hand remains on his shoulder while the other grips a handful of soft white hair, yanking his head back so you can look into his eyes.
“You might not last long, but the great thing about this is that we can do it as much as we want to build up your stamina~.” 
Your words seem to unlock something in your boyfriend as his eyes widen as you roll your hips. You fully believed hearing the promise of more sex would be enough to send him over the edge. But it doesn’t. Instead, it makes him snarl as squeezes your ass before thrusting up, fucking into you with full force. Fucking the air out of your lungs, leaving you breathless and stunned as he uses one hand to trail down to your clit, his thumb rubbing the bundle of nerves back and forth. The sudden change, the flip of dynamics, had you falling forward, your face buried in his neck. 
“Oh fuck~ fuck~ holy shit.” You cry out, trying to match his frantic movements but failing. Was he a virgin?! How? How was that possible when he was fucking into you like a porn star?!
“Ooh~ god fuck, fuck!” Your sweet, not-so-innocent boyfriend cries out. “Fuck~ fuck are you g-gonna cum?” He’s suddenly perked up, a new wave of confidence washing over him as your walls clamp down. “Oh fuck, you are!” He grunts out, thumb rubbing faster over your clit. “Fuuuck fuck, please cum~! Cum baby~ cum~!”
You can’t even warn him. His cock is bullying your g-spot while his thumb abuses your clit. You were expecting him to be under your thumb, not vice versa! His eyes widen as you arch your back, eyes ruling into your skull as your walls squeeze his cock so hard it has him whimpering. You cum, screaming his name, squirting all over his lower stomach, pulling him over the edge with you. His cock throbs hard as spurts of cum fill you. He keeps cumming until your orgasm finally comes to an end.
“A-Are you sure you’re a virgin?” You ask between gasps while Satoru peppers hot open-mouth kisses down your neck. 
“Mm, was.” He corrects before shoving you down so he’s on top of you. “I was a virgin.” 
His cock is still hard, your combined cum seeping out around him. “H-heh, uhm Toru—“ you gasp as he pulls out of you before slamming back in. “Nngh!” You cry out, eyes full of tears this time, as the roles have been reversed.
“What was it you said?” And deep, sharp thrust. “Right~ ‘You might not last long, but the great thing about this is that we can do it as much as we want to build up your stamina~?” Your hazy gaze watched Satoru smirking like a madman, a lustful fire burning in his breathtaking eyes. “I’m ready for round two.
And it was that moment you were ready to meet your maker because Gojo Satoru was about to fuck you to the brink of death.
Geto Suguru:
You loved your boyfriend. God, you loved him so much. Not only was he fucking hot, but he was also a complete and total sweetheart. Even though he had gone through so much shit in his high school career, he never once faltered as a good person. He could have gone down a darker path after everything with the star plasma vessel, but he hadn’t. 
Sure, he had gone through a rough time. He didn't sleep well, he lost a bunch of weight, and things just seemed hopeless. But he came to his senses when he saved Nanako and Mimiko from the terrible village they were stuck in. He had every opportunity to take revenge on the monsters that had hurt them. But instead, he called you and Gojo before acting in rage.
The three of you had saved those girls, and they were now under the protection of the high school. Since that fateful night, Suguru started taking better care of himself. He talked things over with you and Gojo, letting you know how much he had been suffering. With both of your help, he started paving his path to a better future—one where he would talk to you and let you know what was going on in his mind. A future was full of love and light.
It was funny to think that it was three years ago, and now you both were living together, on missions as full-fledged Jujutsu Sorcerer. Reminiscing over the past like that made the time fly by. You were looking through old photos on your cell phone when the door to your apartment opened. Geto walked in still in his gym clothes, his hair tied up in a tight bun. He was coated in sweat as he slipped his shoes off and headed into the bedroom.
“Hi Sugu, how was your workout?”
“Good.” He presses a chaste kiss to your cheek. “I’m happy to be home. I missed you.” His chaste kiss turns into another, followed by another, until his lips press firmly against your mouth.
You hum happily, kissing him back, arms snaking around his neck as you pull him down on top of you. He lays on top of you, his hips pressing against yours, as you lick his bottom lip. He allows you to slide your tongue into his mouth, his hands gently grabbing your waist, and you deepen the kiss, tasting the remains of his pre-workout on his tongue. 
Maybe the reminiscing of the past or the traces of strawberry flavor that lingers in his mouth makes you want to get in a workout yourself. You’d been with Geto for over two years, and between finishing school and adjusting to your lives as full-time sorcerers, you hadn’t gotten more intimate than hand stuff and oral sex. Tonight was the perfect night for you guys to take it further. 
You rocked your hips up, pleased to feel his throbbing erection against your thigh. He grunts, breaking the kiss, a string of saliva connecting your lips. His eyes narrow as you rock up against him again, drawing a moan from his throat. 
“Mm, someone’s needy.”
“Mhmm~ thinking about you and how hot you are makes me all horny.” 
“Ooh? Well, let me help with that.” He goes to slide his hand into your pajama pants, but you grip his wrist, preventing him from slipping under. “Want me to eat you out instead? I could use a treat after my workout.”
“No, I want you to fuck me.” 
Your request had your boyfriend blinking in shock for a moment. “Fuck you?” He repeated that as if you were speaking a foreign language; he was incapable of understanding. 
“Yes~ we’ve been together for a while; I want to take it to the next phase.” You tug your tank top off, tossing it to the floor. “Come on, I want you.”
 
Suguru stares at you for the longest time, eyes taking in your bare form before he nods. The tent in his pants has excitement rushing through you. You’d had sex before you and Geto got together. You and Nanami were eighteen and in a hotel after a stressful mission. So you both decided to have sex—several times in one night and a few times after that. But you were better friends than lovers. 
Of course, you and Suguru were both experienced. So this was bound to be the best sex of your life. You couldn’t wait to feel him buried inside of you.
Getting on all fours, you arched your back as deep as you could, your ass in the air. Looking over your shoulder, you watched as your boyfriend rolled a condom over his cock with shaking hands. Aw, the poor guy was so excited he was shaking! 
Suguru was shaking because he was about to have sex for the first time in his life. He never brought it up because who cared about virginity? It wasn’t that big of a deal for guys, well, for him at least. Having that mindset didn’t change the fact that he was nervous. 
He did not want to cum the second he slid inside of you; he couldn't cum before getting you off. There was no doubt he could do that. He'd done it plenty of times before. Making you cum was one of his favorite things to do! On his tongue, fingers, his thigh, getting you off got him off. But cumming inside of you before even having a chance to fuck you, that had him doubting himself. 
“Sugu~ you okay, babe?” 
Suguru blinked, looking at your delicious body. The curves of your ass, your wet pussy eagerly waiting for him to slide inside of you. You were so beautiful, but seeing you like this, so bare and needy, god, it had his body moving on its own. 
“I’m good; I’ll be even better once I’m inside you.” Without cumming first thing. “I’m going to uhm—uh—”
You giggle cocking a brow. “Fuck me?” 
“Yeah, that.” You giggle again, but as he pushes the tip of his cock past the tight ring of muscles, your giggle turns into a soft moan. Suguru bites down on his bottom lip with a growl. You’re so tight and fuck; it was like you were sucking him into your heat. The feeling of you wrapped around him had him gripping your ass for dear life. “Fuck~ fuuuck~ ah~”
“Ah fuck~” you groan as he stops, “Suguru~ baby, no need to stop. I can take you, I promise.” 
“S-Sto—” he groans, “please.”
“Huh? Please, what baby?” 
“Sto—ahhh!” He rests his head against your shoulder blade. “Haaah.” Several hot breaths spread over your skin as he sinks deeper. 
Shit, he was really into it. Slowly sliding into you, savoring every second. “God, you’re being so hot~ savoring it, are you?” Suddenly, a hand wraps around your neck before clamping down over your mouth. 
“Please, Princess, I am begging you to stop talking.” Your eyebrows knit together as you turn to look at him, only to be met with his flushed fucked out face. “E-Everytime you talk to me, you clench down on me, and I-I’m trying extremely hard not to cum and ruin our first time.” Your eyes widen as he exhales softly. “Well, my first time.”
 
“Eh?!” Your muffled scream had your boyfriend growling, his head falling forward.
“Fuck, please, baby!” He drops his hand from your mouth, gripping the sheets instead. “Please, please.”
“You’re a virgin? I thought you had done it.” 
“Who the hell would I have had sex with?”
You blush, feeling a bit silly for your assumption. “W-Well, his name rhymes with Hoe-Joe.” The room is nearly silent, aside from Suguru’s groans. 
“No, hell no, what the fuck, babe?” 
“You both are close! I just thought maybe—ya’ know, lonely mission?” He’s so quiet it has you giggling. “Thought he would show you his infinite void.” 
More laughter escaped you, only to be cut off by Suguru thrusting inside of you. “If you’re going to keep talkin’, at least scream my name.” You cried out, gripping the sheets, crying out softly, as he set a messy pace.
It doesn’t have much rhythm, but it doesn’t matter because he makes up for it with all of his cock. It’s thick and long enough to hit all the right spots. Suguru grips a handful of your hair, tugging your head back as his other hand gropes your ass, thrusting in and out of you at a pace that has you crying big fat tears. 
“S-Sugu!” You cry out as Suguru watches the way your ass ripples with each thrust. And it has his hips moving faster and harder, going as deep as he can. “Y-You liar!” 
“Why the fuck are you calling me a liar.” There’s almost a smug grin on his face as you blubber mindlessly against the sheets. Your walls are twitching, and your legs are trembling as he fucks you closer to your orgasm.
“N-no way! Ah ah!! No way y-you’re a virgin!” He slams into your cervix, making you scream in pained pleasure. “Fuck!” 
“Oh, I am, and this virgin’s going to make you cum so hard you cry more.” 
His once hesitant, messy thrusts find a brutal pace that had you screaming. Screaming his name as he slams over and over into your g-spot. You turn to stare into his eyes, only to have him hit his lips against yours in a kiss of horny need. You cry out, trying to match his momento but failing miserably. It was hard to kiss your boyfriend, who was rearranging your guts.
“Gah~ ah ah! C-cumming Sugu~!!” Suguru seizes up as you cum; your walls contract around his hard cock. Milking him towards his orgasm.
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Gah!” His body stills behind you and you can feel his cock throbbing hard inside of you. The condom is filling with his cum, only stopping once you collapse onto the mattress, gasping for air.
For a moment, he was proud he was better off than you. Only to realize just how fucked up and pussydrunk he was when he moved. Suguru feels completely drained. You had milked him for everything he was worth. He slowly pulls out of you, pinching the tip of the condom to prevent his cum from slipping out as he pulls it off. 
He wants to get up to grab a rag to wipe you, but he just wrapped his arms around you instead, pulling me close to him as he lays you both down against the pillows. He was gently running his index finger down the bridge of your nose before pushing hair out of your face. Your eyes weakly open before closing once more. 
“You OK there, princess?” 
“I just got fucked within an inch of my life by my boyfriend, who just happened to be a virgin.”
“Yeah, sorry if I wasn't that good.”
“Shut the fuck up.” Suguru stares at you for the longest moment. “That was the best I’ve ever had in my life. You may have been a virgin, but do not ever do anything differently. Fuck me like that every time, and I’ll be the one to propose to you in the future.”
A sudden burst of confidence spread through Suguru’s chest. “Yeah? You’re gonna propose to me?” All you manage to do is nod. “It was that good, huh?” You nod again, snuggling your face into his chest. “Yeah, it was a pretty fucking perfect first time for me, too.” he presses his lips gently against your forehead, holding as tight as he can as he both doze off.
Nanami Kento:
When you and Nanami first started dating, he was pretty forward with the fact that he had never been with anyone else. Meaning you were the first woman he had ever taken out on a date, kissed, and fooled around with. Despite Nanami’s inexperience in dating, he was the best thing to ever happen to you. So once things started to get a little more heated in the bedroom, you decided you wanted to make his first time as special as he had made you feel and your relationship.
This is how Nanami found himself sitting on the beach in Okinawa under an umbrella, shading him from the blazing sun. You were lying beside him, watching as he looked at the ocean waves. He seemed so content, a book resting in his hand as the ocean breeze blew through his hair. 
Seeing him so relaxed and happy, the way that he made you feel on a daily basis. 
Nanami glanced down at you, catching you staring at him; he didn’t mind; he smiled at you before gently stroking your hair back. “I needed this vacation. Thank you for setting it up.” He laid down on the beach towel next to you, his hand stroking strands of hair back against your head. 
“You deserve a break as much as anyone else.” You gently ran your hand down his toned stomach, catching how he sharply inhaled and his muscles tensed. “Kento, I was thinking about our relationship.” 
“Oh, what about it?”
“I was thinking I am ready to take it to the next step if you are.”
“By next step, I assume you mean us having sex?” Nanami watches as you eagerly nod your head. “Are you comfortable with taking that next step?” 
Your fingers trace shapes over his abs, gently easing him into a more relaxed state. “I’m more than ready to be with you. The real question is if you’re ready.” Your boyfriend’s muscles twitch underneath your touch, and you can hear the soft groan that leaves his lips as your fingers dip lower, brushing over the happy trail that leads into his swim trunks. 
“I must admit, I have been wanting to take it to the next step.” His large, warm hand gently grips your wrist, pulling you away from the hardening bulge in his swimsuit. “And as eager as I am to get underway with it, I would much rather not lose my virginity on a beach in front of other beachgoers if I’m completely honest.”
You wanted to laugh at his assumption you were going to pull his cock out and have sex with him right there. “Then let’s go back to the room. It should be all set up for our special night.” Nanami knew that you weren’t a virgin. You had other partners in the past, ones that treated you not so great in the long run. But he is their loss because you were the most amazing woman in this entire world.
“Special?” 
“My first time wasn’t special. It was rushed and unplanned. You deserve a special first-time Kento.”
Kento is honored that you thought so highly of him. That is the sole reason he’s able to sit up and start packing your belongings. “Well, what do you say we return to our hotel room then? We could have some fun, and then I’ll order our room service.” His smile is so contagious and warm and sweet. That smile is the whole reason you planned the special trip. 
“I love the sound of that.”
Upon arrival to your hotel room, Nia unlocks the door with the key card and steps inside. There’s a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice on the nightstand beside the bed, along with two glasses. You shuffle past him, heading to the bathroom with your duffel bag over your shoulder.
 
“I just need a couple of minutes to freshen up. Would you mind pouring the champagne?” 
“I would be honored.” He hooked his arm around your waist, pulling you in for a gentle kiss. “Don’t keep me waiting for long. I’m typically a patient man, but you made me feel a little mischievous this evening.”
By the time you run to the bathroom, none of me opens the bottle of champagne and pours both glasses. He hears the door open. He turns around, both glasses in hand, and he nearly drops them as he looks over. You’re wearing red lingerie. The Lacey fabric is see-through, revealing your nipples that are already hard, and he can tell from this angle that you aren’t wearing any underwear. 
His throat is suddenly dry, and he puts the glasses on the nightstand to prevent him from making a mess. Seeing you in such a state had his cock throbbing in his pants, threatening to cum at any minute. If that happened, champagne isn’t the only mess he’d have to worry about cleaning up.
“You’re breathtaking,” he whispers into the space between you as you walk forward. “What did I do to deserve such a beauty as you.”
“I ask myself the same question almost every day I’m with you.”
His eyes linger on yours for the longest of moments before he closes the distance between you. His hands gently grab your hips, using your back towards the bed. Nanami is so gentle, conveying every ounce of love he has for you in the simple caresses of his fingers against your skin. You were beginning to wonder if this would be as special for you as it was for him. Because despite all of the experience, you feel like you’re a virgin along with him.
“I want to feel you.” He presses and gently kisses up your arms. “Every part of you, allow me to drown myself in your warmth, my love.” 
You have no complaints, arching your back, your hands moving down to pull at the drawstring of his swim trunks. His lips move slowly over your collarbone, tongue licking at it, tracing the shape of it against your skin. Kento’s lips gently caress over your heated skin, and your hands push his swimsuit down past his ass, allowing you to freely grip his cock in your hands.
“You’re already so hard, Ken.” Whispering breathlessly against his ear. “You must be as excited as me.” 
While he continues to trace kisses over your skin, you gently take one of his hands and place it between your legs. His fingers waste no time. They push the flimsy fabric of the lingerie, pulling it underneath your breasts before his fingers up and down over your slit, rubbing your slick all over your pussy. 
Nanami grunts as you give his cock, a gentle squeeze as his fingers tease your clit. “You weren’t kidding, you are excited.” His index finger traces gentle hearts over your hardened bud as you had them to him on the beach. “You’re so warm,” he dips his fingers down lower, pushing his middle finger inside of you. “And tight, I promise I’m going to make you feel so good. But before I give you my cock allow me to stretch you out just a bit.” he gently plunges his middle finger in and out of you before adding his ring finger, hooking his fingers up into that spongy spot deep inside of you.
His fingers nearly make it impossible for you to pleasure him as he pleasures you. Your boyfriend doesn’t mind; he only cares about making you feel good and rewarding you for booking a trip for his sake. Your walls clench around his fingers, and he speeds it up at the feeling. Your pussy was telling him that you were close without you having to speak. But just as he hooks his finger into your g-spot to get you to squirt, you grab his wrist. 
“N-No wanna cum with you inside me.”
“Alright, I can do that.”
Nanami quickly kicks his swim trunks off before positioning himself between your legs. He truly takes a moment to take you in as a whole. The way your eyes are slightly narrowed. How your beautiful lips parted somewhat with your soft gasps. You, indeed, are the most beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life, and you were going to be the first woman he had sex with. If things continued to go as well as they were, you might be the only one he ever has sex with.
“Ken?” The softness of your voice draws him back to the current reality. “Are you alright?” 
“Never been better.” He gently fluffs your pillow before taking your legs, allowing you to wrap them around his hips. “I love you; thank you for making this night so special.” 
“I love you too~”
Kento gently kisses you as he pushes the head of his cock inside your pussy. The feeling of your wet, warm walls pulling him in makes him shiver. Your mouth always felt good, and he had always imagined sex to feel like that, but he couldn’t have been more off. Sliding inside of your tight heat is like entering heaven. It feels as though his senses are heightened. You feel so soft and warm, your scent is intoxicating, and everything about you is perfect beyond words.
So many different sensations hit him at once. The only thing that seemed relatively clear for him to do was to fuck you. So he pulled himself out before pushing himself inside balls deep. As soon as he bottomed out, he was pulling back out again, slamming back into you, causing you to arch your back off the mattress, your eyes wide, mouth gaping as a man who had, two minutes prior, begun as hard as he could.
“You feel so good~ fuck, you feel so fucking good.” Nanami typically wasn’t one curse, but the sensation of you wrapped around his cock had him losing his self-control.  “You’re pussy is so wet. How are you so wet?”
“Y-You ha-ah!” Another sharp snap of his hips takes the breath out of your lungs. “Ah fuck! You have that effect on me. I’m always wet around you, Ken!” 
“That’s good to know~” his lips smash against yours, “so you’re telling me whenever I need to fuck you, you’ll be ready?” Something about the dirty words had you clamping down on his thick length. “Oh, my love likes that idea, doesn’t she?” 
“Y-Yes~!”
“You want me to use you~?”
“Yes, Kento!” 
“Want me to fill you with my cock whenever I want~?”
“Ah, fuck~!! Fuuuck yes, Keeen!”
Your boyfriend kisses you again, tongue slipping inside of your mouth as he gently grabs your hands holding them as he fucks into you. You squeeze them as your tongue gently wraps around his as he swallows your moans. This wasn’t just sex for Kento. This was more profound and had more meaning than two people using each other for pleasure. This was love.
His thrust slowed as he slowly thrust in and out of you. His kisses were gentler as his hands squeezed yours as tight as he could. The change was nice; it had your desperate cries of pleasure turning into soft mewls of satisfaction. He followed close behind you, gently moaning into you as he released one of your hands to grab your hip gently.
“I don’t just want to use you whenever I see fit.” He whispers, breaking away from your kiss-swollen lips. “I want to love you like this. For all time.” 
The pure adoration in his words almost has you in tears. “K-Kento~ oh god—love you.” He grins, pressing soft kisses against you before his hips pick up their pace. “Oooh fuck, babe.”
“I-I’m sorry—believe I’ve reached my limit.” He groans against your mouth. “Fuck I’m so close, where do you want it?” His hand on his hip slides between your body, finding your slit with ease. 
“Inside~ please cum inside of me.”
His fingers rub that bundle of nerves in circles just as you liked it. As he pulls you closer and closer to the edge, you kiss him hungrily, your eyes staring into his as your mouth falls open in an ‘O’ shape. The face Nanami knew you made when you would cum. His ministrations increase in speed as he coaxes your orgasm to the surface. You scream, head thrown back as your walls contract around him, squeezing his cock through the spasms of your orgasm.
Watching you come undone all because of him fucking you, it feds into his pleasure. Nanami groans, dropping his beam to the crook of your neck, where he begins thrusting his hip as hard as he can, working you through your orgasm just as he slams into you. His head tilts back, veins protruding in his neck as he growls an animalistic grunt that has you shaking.
“Fuck, take it, love, oooh god fuck!” He feels your walls greedily sucking him dry. “Y-That’s it~ oooh, that’s a good girl for me~!” 
Once you both come down, his hips gently press kisses over every inch of skin he can reach. He pulls back to beam down at you only once, satisfied with your airy giggles. Your sweet soft hand cups his cheek, stroking it gently with his thumb as he slowly somehow manages to pull out of your pussy.
“That was amazing.” He whispered, gently lying down beside you. “You made it a most memorable experience.”
Memorable for him? He was joking. You stared at him in orgasmic bliss as he grabbed the champagne glasses, offering one to you.
“To a fun night and many more experiences like this.” Oh yeah, no, you were screwed as you watched him down the whole glass before crawling between your legs and nipping at your thighs as you shivered. “Relax, darling, I got you.”
Ryomen Sukuna:
You were minding your own business when your roommate walked into your room without knocking. You sighed, throwing your head back as you sat up, ready to start yelling, only to find him flushed and glaring at your bed. With a tilt of your head, you put your phone down, and Sukuna stepped further inside.
“Who's got your panties in a wad?”
“You’ve had sex, right?”
“I beg your pardon?!” 
“You’ve fucked. Like you’re not a virgin?”
Your cheeks burn as you chuck a pillow at his face, which does not affect him as he patiently waits for you to respond. “Why are you barging in on here asking questions about my sex life?!” He says nothing, not even attempting to explain what his reasoning for the impromptu sessions of twenty questions is for. “Oh my god, Kuna. Can you please tell me why?” His eyes roll at the attitude in your tone.
“Some of the guys at the shop were talking about sex and said it’s weird to still be a virgin at nineteen. I’m twenty-one.” 
“Yeah, so am I.”
“And I’ve never had sex.” 
His words don’t seem to compute in your brain as you blankly stare at him before laughing. “Good one, Kuna. You almost had me there for a second. You’ve never had sex, fucking hilarious.” He gets on your bed, sitting in front of you.
“I haven’t.”
“So you’re telling me the Ryomen Sukuna is a virgin?” He nods his head. “How is that even possible?! You're super confident and hot.”
He’s about to snap at you when he takes a moment to process your words. You, his very sexy roommate, thought he was hot. Your confession has him moving in closer, a sinister smirk on his face. 
“I can assure you it is very much true.” a dramatic sigh has you rolling your eyes. “If only there were someone as hot as me who would be willing to sleep with me.” His eyes moved from the ceiling towards you, lingering on your face, waiting to see if you were picking up on what he was putting down. 
“Are you asking me to take your virginity?” 
“Are you willing to help?”
An alternate version of yourself might have said no. But you would get bragging rights. You would be the one to take the virginity of Sukuna himself.  You cross your legs as you pat the spot in front of you. 
“If we do this, there are some ground rules. One, this is a no-strings-attached situation. So when I bring home guys from the bar, you won’t get pissed off.” 
Sukuna threw his head back with a laugh. “You honestly think I give a shit about the men you bring home?”
“Ah ah ah!” You have a finger in front of his face telling him to shut up. “I’m not done with our ground rules! And yes, once I’m done with you, you’ll be very jealous if I bring anyone else home. Rule number two. If you bring any lady friends home, I won’t get jealous of them.” Suddenly, Sukuna had no retort to that. “And rule number three is that we don’t make this awkward after we’re done.” 
“Right, no jealousy from you, me, and no awkwardness.” He held his hand out to you, and you gladly shook it. “Alright, so how do we do this?” 
“Kiss me.” 
For the first time since this conversation began, Sukuna suddenly realized that he had never kissed anyone. And when people typically had sex, kissing was involved. This meant not only was he going to fuck his roommate and best friend, but he was also going to have to kiss you. He wasn’t sure what he was more nervous about. Fucking you or kissing you.
You can see the wheels turning in his head from the look on his face. He was getting lost inside his brain and thinking too hard. Without hesitation, you pushed him back against the bed. Sukuna grunted as you crawled on top of him, straddling his hips. His cock was already throbbing in his boxers, your soft ass pressed against his erection, causing him to let out a deep growl.
“Stop fucking thinking.” You cupped his face in both hands and pressed your lips against his. His lips are surprisingly soft, and unsurprisingly stiff. “Relax, just go with the flow.” 
That was easy for you to say you had done this before. After taking a quick moment to clear his head, Sukuna grabbed the back of your head and brought you closer to his face. Deepening the kiss, his lips matched yours. Both of you feel fireworks go off at the same time; for a virgin, he knew how to kiss. It started slow and gentle. But the more he kissed you, the more desperate it became. He doesn’t even need to flick his tongue over your bottom lip to ask for permission because you’re the one shoving your tongue in his mouth.
He tastes so good; it’s almost like a sake with a hint of mint. His taste has you moaning as you roll your hips back up against his hard cock. He’s gripping your hips as you kiss him with every ounce of your being. Kissing Sukuna was so fucking hot.
Sukuna growls into your mouth, his hands wander further down, groping at the fat of your ass, massaging it, urging you to continue rocking up and down over his erection. This felt one million times better than his hand. All of his fantasies could not have prepared him for the friction he felt. He swears to God he’s already leaking pre-cum into his boxers because of how good you look. 
You break the kiss, pulling away a string of saliva and connecting your mouths. His hands remain on your ass as he watches you reach down, lifting your T-shirt up and over your head. Sukuna had seen you in your bra and bathing suit before. This time, this was different. Because you didn’t just leave your bra on, your bra followed your T-shirt onto the ground, revealing your perfect tits to him. 
“W-Whoa.” Sukuna’s hands leave the fat of your ass more intrigued by the softness of your breasts. He grows them in both hands, gently groping and massaging them, feeling their softness under his palms. “They’re so soft.” 
“Fuuck Kuna~” The mewls of pleasure that leave your mouth have his cock twitching in his boxers. He heard you moan when you would bring home partners from the bar or when it was late at night, and you were getting yourself off. Sukuna always thought you sounded pretty. But moaning on top of him was an experience he never imagined would happen. “Your hands feel so good.” 
He loses all self-control when you reach your hands down, pulling the drawstring of his basketball shorts. The man who had just been so nervous and unsure what to do with you flips you. You’re pinned on your back; Your heart feels like it’s about to explode as he tugs his basketball shorts down, tucking them underneath his heavy, full balls. 
His cock is a fucking monster. It’s thick, long, and bigger than any of the dildos you own. Looking at its red throbbing tip that’s leaking a fair amount of pre-cum, you lick your lips. For you know that his cock is going to hit all of the right spots at the same time. That was if he was able to fuck you without cumming the second he thrusts inside.
“Holy fuck, big dick, McGee. Fucking Christ, where have you been hiding that thing?” so Ana doesn’t know whether to laugh or be embarrassed, so he does the only other thing he can think of; and he rips your shorts and panties off. “Kuna, fuck, those were new!” 
“I’ll buy you another pair, fuck I’ll buy you ten pairs. I just can’t fucking wait anymore.” Sukuna forces your legs open and stares down at your wet, glistening pussy. “Fuck looks like she ‘s excited.”
Do you want to tell him to shut up and not stare? Yes, but it’s hard to do that when he shoves his fingers slowly inside of your wet, pulsing cunt. He works you open, relishing in the feeling of your wet, slick coating his fingers. It was so warm and sticky he could only imagine what it would feel like to have his dick inside there rather than his fingers. It was the motivation he needed to push forward and fuck you like no one had before.
You scream when he curls his fingers up like he had done before. He bites his lip as he curls them upward and finds your g-spot almost instantly. He’s putting the amount of pressure on his thumb as it circles your clit. There was no fucking way this man had never been with a woman before. Because if he hadn’t, he was a fucking sex god incarnate.
“Fuck! Fuck Kuna! Stop! I-I’m gonna squirt! A-And I don’t want you to f-freak!” 
Your roommate laughs; he fucking laughs as he stares down at you with a starved look in his eyes as if he hadn’t eaten in years. “Do it, squirt on me. I’m not like these other fucking men. I want you to squirt all over me because that means I’m doing a good job, right?” His words alone send you fucking over the edge. You scream at the top of your lungs, and you’re sure your neighbors hate you. But you didn’t care; all you cared about was the fact that this man, who is a virgin, was making you squirt so hard you see God himself.
Sukuna’s eyes widen as he witnesses a stream of clear liquid come out of you, coating his hand and his wrist, and it’s so hot. You were panting, chest rising and falling as you came down from the high of your orgasm. In between those breaths, you grab his cock and lead it directly towards your entrance.  Sukuna is shocked at your blunt nonverbal request for him to fuck you, but he’s more than happy to oblige. 
He slowly slides the tip of his cock into it, and he buckles. “Oh fuck. You felt good around my fingers, but damn, it feels like my dick died and went to heaven. Holy shit.” Sukuna, pay close attention to your facial reactions. He knows he has a big dick, so of course, you were going to need time to adjust to a size.
“Y-You can move.” You whine out as he adjusts, putting you into a mating press of all positions for his first time. “Oh my fuckin’ —Ah!” You yelp in pleasure as he pulls out just to start a brutal pace of fucking you with no remorse.
“Fuck, this cunt is so tight~ feels so good~” Sukuna presses his lips against yours, stealing your breath away. “You like that, don’t you? Like being my little cocksleeve? Mhmm fuck you feel so fucking good.” 
“Ah~! Ah! Fuuuuck!!” 
“Hah!” He growled, pressing his forehead against yours, crimson eyes staring into your soul. “That right, this virgin is fucking you so good you can’t even form coherent thoughts, can you?” 
“Kuuuuna~!” You sob as he slams in and out of you as fast and as deep as he can. Just like you had thought, his cock does hit all the right spots. He doesn’t even need to come up with a pace because he just makes up with all the cock he’s packing.
“Oh yeah, baby~ say my name~”
“K-Kuuuna!“
“That’s it~ nnngh, fuck that’s it baby. Say. My. Name~!” The head of his cock slams perfectly against your cervix. Making you cry out,
“Sukunaaa-ah-Ah!” 
Your best friend thrusts in and out of you until he’s losing control over himself and his momentum. He can’t lose control yet. He wants you to finish with him. So he kisses you just like when you first asked him to. It’s deep, and it’s hard, and it makes your toes curl. He feels so good. He tastes good. Everything is perfect in every sense of the word.
“Fuuuuck babe~ fuuuuck yes you are such a good girl, taking my cock like a good girl.” He grunts, kissing you again, his hips bucking, balls slapping the curve of your ass as he slams into you so hard the bed frame starts creaking. “You’re getting so tight around me. Are you gonna cum~? Going to cum all over my fat cock?” 
“Y-yea! G-Gonna cum! Gonna cum Kuuuna!”
Your roommate bites at your bottom lip but gently pulls it back between his teeth, letting it go before he presses his lips against it. His thrusts are messy, and he’s losing all self-control. In an instant, his thumb finds your clit circling gently around it. 
“Cum then, my pretty girl~”
You do as he commands; your legs tremble as he presses you further into the mattress, your knees brought up to your chest as he fucks you through your orgasm. You’re screaming, squirting a mess all over your bed as he fuck you through it. The intensity of clamping down and tumbling over the edge has Sukuna’s hips stilling before he begins, thrusting like a madman in and out of your tight, wet heat as he spills his come inside of you. 
You’re crying by the time his hips slow down, his body collapsing on top of you, releasing you from the position he has you in. He’s panting roughly against your neck as he growls, pulling you to lie on top of him as he plops back on the mattress while your body shakes and trembles with the aftershocks of your orgasm. Sukuna grunts as he feels his come beginning to leak out around his cock, pulling on his lower abdomen before dripping down onto the bed
“Holy shit,” he sighs, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I see why people go crazy over sex.” 
“Yeah, it feels really good, doesn’t it?” You tremble with exhaustion. “God, are you sure you were a virgin? Because I don’t think anybody has fucked me that hard before.” 
“Well, I’m honored,” he grins, pushing strands of your hair back as you turn to rest your chin on his chest. Your beautiful eyes narrow as the post-orgasmic bliss washes over you like a warm blanket. In that moment, he really takes you in as a whole. Your beauty, the selflessness that you showed tonight by allowing him to sleep with you, he’s so entranced that he leans in and kisses you gently. “Say, did we make a rule about not catching feelings for each other?”
You’re too stunned to speak; his words have tased you. “Huh?” Your cheeks are flushed as your roommate scratches the back of his head as his other gently moves up and down your back.
“I know we said we wouldn’t get jealous of any partners we bring home, but if we avoid that altogether, let me take you out properly.” 
“Well, I think that’s a great idea. Because there’s no way in hell I’m letting any of these skanky bitches get a hold of that mega dick.” You kiss him back, giggling against his lips. 
“It’s all yours for the taking, babe. No need to worry about skanky bitches here.” He kisses you again, laying back against the sheets. Who knew going to his best friend for help would lead to the best thing ever happening to him?
Forever Tag List:
@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks
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ੈ✩‧ I don’t like his intentions (smau) ੈ✩‧
pairing : charles leclerc x hamilton! fem reader
summary : the hamilton sibling starting soemthing with her brother’s future teammate
a/n : This is series ! anyways enjoy ! also feel free to drop in a request or a qestion ! TAGLIST IS OPEN !!
·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・ ・゚·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・・゚·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚
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liked by lewishamilton, charlesleclerc, liliyhye and 118,327 others
otherhamilton What a end to 2024!!🎆
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user 1 SHE IS MANIFESTING FERRARI PODIUM!!
user 2 Lewis to Ferrari is my only hope in f1
user 3 even she is excited for Lewis Ferrari era!
↳ liked by otherhamilton
lewishamilton can’t wait for 2025!
↳ liked by otherhamilton
charlesleclerc 🤍🪽 ↳ liked by otherhamilton
user 4 Y/N shall provide lewis x charles crumb !
lilihye the girl is shining! ↳ liked by otherhamilton
user 5 isn’t lewis black -
user 6 tf bro- user 5 just curious man 🙌🏻 user 6 then you should know that anything is possible in biology , even giving birth to an idiot like you !
user 7 BAHAHAH- @user6 THAT WAS EPIC !
user 6 no one says anything to @otherhamilton
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liked by lewishamilton, charlesleclerc, georgerussell and 124,327 others
otherhamilton just some British winter 🇬🇧
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lewishamilton I told you not to post that image
otherhamilton aww big brother 🩵
user 1 ROSCOEEE
user 2 WOOF WOOF
user 3 WOOF WOOF
user 4 are we barking for roscoe or lewis-
user 5 we only bark for y/n!
lilyhye So pretty !!🤩
 ↳ liked by otherhamilton 
francisca.cgnomes we need to catch up babes! 🙌🏻
otherhamilton date and time babes 👀
user 6 it’s like lewis has a famous sister
user 7 Marry me 💍
charlesleclerc pretty 🩵
↳ liked by otherhamilton
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liked by lewishamilton, charlesleclerc, and 134,854 others
otherhamilton thank you so much for inviting me @ balenciaga !
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user 1 MY HEART DIED -
user 2 THE ULTIMATE GENES OF HAMILTON PARENTS -
kellypiquet it was great spending time with you !
otherhamilton it was lovely chatting the night away !
kellypiquet thank you for letting me know who broke my heels 💪🏻
maxverstappen1 I thought we had a pact @otherhamilton
otherhamilton hoes before bros 💪🏻🫶🏻
charlesleclerc 🔥❤️
user 4 CHARLES !?
user 5 SIR LECLERC !?
user 6 CHARLES 👀👀
user 7 🫴 lord perceval
user 8 damn Ferrai smitten by mercedes
f1wags do we smell something here ?
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ms-demeanor · 3 days
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if we're like, showing graphs and stuff, this is the type that i think a lot of people on tumblr are thinking of when they think about the economy.
Only one third of people with family incomes below $50k spent less than their income each month. I would guess that a lot of people on tumblr who get aggro about this topic (and the vast majority of people on r/povertyfinance, who discuss this sort of thing a lot) fall into this earning category.
Real wage increases only matter if you got a raise (one third of workers got a raise last year, which means that 2/3rds didn't - included in the economic wellbeing report linked above). Whether or not rent is outpacing wages only matters if you're not going to be rent burdened (more than a third of renter households are cost burdened in every state and 12 million rental households spend more than half their income on rent). Employment rates lose a lot of meaning when you're working multiple jobs to make ends meet (the percentage of multiply employed workers was falling in the US from 1996 to the 2010s, when it plateaued, then it started rising slightly then collapsed in 2020 and has been rising steeply since then and it's too soon to tell if it's going to go back to the plateau or keep going up).
Four in ten adults in the US is carrying some level of medical debt (even people who are insured) and 60% of people with medical debt have cut back on food, clothes or household items; about 50% of people with medical debt have used up all their savings.
Tumblr is the broke people website and yeah, people who are working two jobs to afford $900 for one room and utilities in a three bedroom apartment are not going to feel great about the economy even if real wages are raising and inflation-adjusted rents are actually pretty stable. "The Rent is too Damn High" has been a meme for 14 years so, like, yeah. Even if it's pretty stable when adjusted for inflation it is stable and HIGH.
It's hard to feel good about the economy when you're spending the last few days of the pay period hoping nothing unexpected hits your account, and it's VERY frustrating to be told that the economy's doing well when you've had to start selling blood to buy groceries.
Sure, unemployment is low, that's neat. It's good that inflation has stabilized (it genuinely has; prices are not likely to fall back to pre-inflation rates and eventually you'll likely be paid enough to reach equilibrium, but a lot of people aren't there yet).
But, like, it costs eight thousand dollars a year out of pocket to keep my spouse alive. I'd guess that we've paid off about a third of the 40-ish thousands of dollars he's racked up since his heart attack. His medical debt is why I don't have a retirement plan beyond "I guess I'll die?" So talking about how good the economy is kind of feels like being chained in the bottom of a pit that is slowly filling with water while people on the surface talk about the fact that the rain is tapering off. Neat! That's good! But I can't really see it from where I'm standing.
Inflation really is getting better. My state just enacted a $20 minimum wage for fast food workers. The Biden administration has worked hard to reduce many kinds of healthcare costs. A lot of people have had significant portions of their student debt cancelled.
But a lot of people are still having trouble affording groceries and it doesn't seem helpful to say "your perception of the economy is decoupled from the reality of the economy" on the "can I get a few dollars for food today?" website.
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confusionmeisss · 3 days
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can you watch my boyfriend, please? - c. sturniolo
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🫧 chris sturniolo x fem!reader
🫧 the “can you babysit my boyfriend” tiktok couples trend with chris!!
🫧 this is just fluff. there is the use of “y/n” apologies. some swears. that’s about it.
🫧 548 words.
🫧 hi lovelies!! thank u for wanting to read!!!! :) i’ve been seeing tons of videos of this trend & i was inspired. i thought it would fit chris soo well! i hope u enjoy reading bc this was very fun to write!! <3
Chris was sitting at the kitchen table, sipping idly on a capri sun and scrolling away on his phone. He was blissfully unaware of his surroundings, he didn’t even hear the sound of your footsteps approaching.
Chris looks up when he hears your voice.
“Hey guys, can you watch my boyfriend for me, please? I’ll be back quick, I promise, I just need to go and grab something.
Chris watches you say, smiling at your phone camera, propping it up against the vase of tulips. He looks up at you confused, but you just place a kiss in his hair and smile once more at the camera before leaving the kitchen.
“Uhm,” Chris mumbles out, looking confusedly at the camera.
His confusion only lasts a moment though before he starts speaking. “So I was up late last night, and I stumbled upon this video about analog horror and liminal spaces and the backrooms and such. And then I found this one guys youtube channel and I’ve been binging his videos since like three am. Dude, the backrooms are fucking freaky. I just know they would make Nick paranoid as fuck, so I definitely have to show them to him,” he says with a laugh.
He reaches for his capri sun. “Oh! I’ve been on such a capri sun kick for the past like week. Pepsi is still my number one though,” he says, making a heart with his hands.
“Hey, how do people make the heart with their fingers? Y/N can do it, and she’s tried teaching me, but I just can’t seem to get it!” Chris huffs out, attempting to make a heart with his fingers. He stares down at them trying to bend them into the shape he’s seen you do multiple times.
He lets out a huff, looking back up at the camera, and letting his hands fall onto the table. “See, I just can’t seem to get it!”
“Oh! Oh! We went out to eat yesterday for dinner, and,” Chris cuts himself off with a little giggle, “and we witnessed this guy scrape all the toppings off his pizza and then stack the pieces up on the tray. I’ve never in my twenty years seen someone do that!”
Chris looks up when hears you approaching.
You lean over his shoulder. “Hey, I’m back, thanks for watching him guys. I hope he wasn’t too much trouble.”
Chris looks up at you offended by this statement, but you just smile down at him, and place a hand in his hair, reaching with the other to end your recording.
comments
the way chris had to assure us that pepsi was still his number one beverage choice 😭
pls let us babysit him again, he was very well behaved. just talked our ears off, 10/10 very pleasant 😁
not chris wanting to show nick the backrooms knowing he’d be paranoid by them 😭
someone did what with their pizza????
capri suns are 🔥🔥🔥
him trying to do the finger heart is so 🥺💕
don’t worry chris, i too, cannot do the finger heart
his giggleeee 💞💞💞
how to be in a relationship like chris & y/n no borax no glue
they’re such cuties 🥰
the way she is with him 🥺 oh i want that badddd
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tawnysoup · 2 days
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I ADORE your art and how well you match the ISAT artstyle. I've been being alot of studies to try replicate the style and draw characters 3d but stylised. Are there any tutorials that have helped you, studies you do, or things you keep in mind whilst drawing to make the characters look so 3d?
Oooaaahh thank you!!! This is a really good question. I say that because I feel like I "2D cheat" ISAT art a lot. It's very comfy to draw bc my normal art is like that too, with angles that shouldn't be able to exist but look right bc it's 2D so your brain forgives it. Design of the art > accuracy of the anatomy, y'kno?
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The hair kind of gives it away in most cases. It's meant to be such a specific shape, it kind of stops looking like the character if it gets too 3D? But drawing it more 3D has huge utility too, especially for animation n stuff. It's just something I've noticed about the style! It's very designed for 2D. It's very "the shape of the lines" > "the shape of the 3D object"
It's helpful to remember that ISAT characters are all made up of really simple shapes. Like Siffrin's head is just a ball from nearly any angle but the side. Their body is a cylinder but one end is wider than the other. Odile's face is a ball but the bottom is long, like an oval. Isa's is a ball but his chin is square, it has soft corners. Even Bonnie's face is a ball you just add a cheek bump. Etc etc.
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^Notice how i can't simplify the hat down into a consistent 3D shape bc otherwise it just. kind of. doesn't look like Siffrin's hat LOL
If you have the simple 3D shapes down then the rest of it is all 2D cheating and focussing on details! Having character refs nearby at all times especially when ur tryna figure out how to draw the character is KEY so you can keep looking at it and comparing. Try to pay attention to the little quirks of the art style that differ from yours and try to mimic them. But don't be afraid to let your style infect it a bit if it helps you to create something more dynamic looking.
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It helps that i've been drawing for ages. I know 'practice' is the age old advice but here's my spin on it: just draw, keep drawing what u want no matter if it looks bad or if some professional artist tells you you're doing it wrong. So long as you keep drawing you are learning. Indulge and draw what you want so you get to keep all the motivation and keep going.
oh and PUSH YOUR POSES/EXPRESSIONS!!! By this I mean, draw it once, and then lower the opacity and draw it again on top but pushing everything a little bit further. If a pose feels stiff this tends to fix it.
uhmmm i rambled on for ages but i hoped it helped u Tea (or anyone else reading)! thank u for the excuse to draw a bunch of funny isat doodlies :D keep going you have GOT THIS!!! THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO MAKE OR ENJOY ART! YAY
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oddinary4bts · 2 days
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Chasing Cars | ch 3 (jjk)
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☆summary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?
☆pairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader
☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, this chapter contains mature content)
☆genre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff
☆warnings: a power outage, Jungkook being a menace as per always, getting stood up for Valentine's Day, falling on a patch of ice, alcohol, curses, peach, OC gets a little jealous, explicit content: teasing?, dom!Jungkook, big dick!Jungkook, sex toy (vibrator), male and female masturbation, praising, cum play (don't be stupid), fingering
☆word count: 13.2k
☆a/n: this is like one of my fav chapters in this whole series, and also the one inspired by jungkook's iconic live with the candle and the white dress shirt and oof :') hope you enjoy it!! Thank you to @moonleeai and @jessikahathaway for beta-ing, you guys are the best <3
☆series masterpost
☆add yourself to the taglist here!
☆☆☆☆☆
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
☆☆☆☆☆
Thursday, February 14th 
Sometimes, the universe aligns to create such a shitty day that you think your life is a joke. A cruel joke, and you’re just the sitcom character that people use to make themselves feel better.
Today has been one of those days. You woke up late, somehow not hearing your alarm, and got to your midterm so late you didn’t have time to finish. At least you were confident in the answers that you did write down, so you think there’s a chance you’ll still pass. 
Then, you forgot your student ID, and the lady at the cafeteria refused to let you eat even though she’s seen you almost every day of the semester so far. Nabi offered you some of her salad, but you felt bad and barely ate.
Then the rain started – freezing rain at that – and you had to run to the other building for your genetics class, ending with your hair half frozen and the knowledge that you’re going to get sick by tomorrow.
Genetics class in and of itself is fine. Your stomach gurgling all through the class isn’t, and you’ve noticed people looking at you where you’re sitting, every time your stomach thinks it’s a whale and it needs to sing to its fellow mates.
During break, someone offers you a protein bar, and you take it with cheeks burning, thanking them profusely. Though you hate the taste of protein bars, and you struggle to finish it without puking on the desk. You power through, and then the class resumes, and you try to focus. It’s hard, and when you receive a text from Hoseok, you stop pretending that you’re listening.
[2:47 pm] Hobi: have u seen the weather outside? [2:47 pm] You: yeah it’s trash. I think I’m still half frozen [2:49 pm] Hobi: don’t have power at my place anymore [2:50 pm] Hobi: and it looks dangerous to drive
You know exactly what’s coming. It shouldn’t even come as a surprise – you don’t know why you agreed to meet up on Valentine’s Day. Yet, you’ve been looking forward to it all day, perhaps because it’s been so shit even hanging out with Hoseok on this day of celebration of love seemed better.
[2:50 pm] Hobi: any chance I can get a raincheck?
You want to bash your head on the desk, and of course, the professor chooses this exact moment to call you out for being on your phone. You flush a deep red, mumbling an apology as you put your phone face down on the desk. Everyone’s looking at you, and from where you’re sitting at the back of the class you can see that half the people aren’t even taking notes. You think they’re full of shit for glaring at you, but you can’t help the way you turn crimson, and Nabi stifles a laugh next to you.
“Shut up,” you whisper through gritted teeth, elbowing her in the ribs. 
She shrugs innocently, and then her eyes slide back to the professor as he resumes the class. Not wanting to risk it, you focus too, and it seems the shame is what you need to finally concentrate because you find yourself typing away on the computer, describing the pictures in the PowerPoint slides so you can understand them later.
The lights go out five minutes before the end of the class. The projector shuts down in time, a clear indication that the college has run out of power too – something that rarely ever happens unless it’s the end of the world outside.
There’s a series of gasps, and the professor looks so jaded at the front of the class that you wouldn’t be surprised if he’s made of the actual precious stone. He looks towards the door, where you can see that the light has also gone out in the hallway.
Without even a glance at the class, he slams his laptop shut, heaving out a sigh.
“Class dismissed for today, we don’t have enough time left to wait for the power to come back on.” 
It doesn’t even take half a second before everyone is starting to put their stuff away, the class suddenly overcome with a cacophony of sounds, and Nabi turns to you.
“Who were you texting during class?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.
“Shut up.” You put your laptop in your bag, chugging the rest of your water bottle before you stuff it next to the laptop. “Hobi cancelled on me.”
Of course the whole friend group now knows about you two. You have Hoseok to blame for that, and his incredibly good idea to have sex at a party last week, where Yoongi walked in on the two of you. You’ve never seen Yoongi look more uncomfortable before in your life and, to your surprise, he’s been teased about the situation a lot more than you or Hoseok. It’s still a relief because you were afraid the friend group would go to shit if people knew, but now it seems it’s only solidified it even more.
“Bruh,” Nabi lets out. “Why?”
You motion to the dead neon lights over your heads. “The weather. He doesn’t have power anymore.”
“Shit.” You finish packing your stuff and you’re walking out of the class when she continues, “That’s wild though, didn’t think the freezing rain would hit that bad.”
A girl in front of you turns as if summoned. “They’re saying it’s going to be the worst storm of the century.” She points her phone towards you and Nabi, screen first. “Look, tons of trees have already fallen.”
Your eyes widen, because indeed she’s showing a picture from a group chat, of a tree having fallen on someone’s poor car. You wince in time with Nabi.
“RIP to whoever’s car that is,” you answer.
The girl nods, a wistful expression taking over her features. “That would be my boyfriend’s.”
You don’t talk more after that, and she jogs to join her friends closer to the stairs. You take that as an opportunity to finally reply to Hoseok, grabbing your phone out of the pocket of your coat.
[3:59 pm] You: power even went out in college so yeah, np!
Hoseok is quicker to reply than you’ve expected, saying that he’d like to meet up some time this weekend if you can. You don’t promise him anything, though you don’t really have plans as of right now.
You’ve just got a feeling that, if the storm is going to be the storm of the century, you won’t be hanging out for at least a few days. And the moment you step outside, you realize that it might even take more than a few days.
Trees have fallen everywhere. The sidewalk is entirely iced, and just by the time you’ve made it to the bus stop in front of the building, you’ve seen a car accident, both cars unable to stop at a stop sign. You figure taking the bus would be dangerous right now, and you settle on aiming for the pedestrian trail that leads to a park near your apartment, while Nabi parts to head towards the dorm, where apparently the power is still on. She tells you to let her know if you have power at home, and then you turn to head towards home, fishing your phone out of your pocket.
At least it’s not raining heavily as you walk. It’s the only positive thing in your day, and you hold onto your phone, sending a text to Taehyung to inform him of the situation.
You’re two minutes from home when you slip on a slab of ice, and you fall in a puddle of mud that stains your pale pants. You don’t even know how there can be mud when everything else is frozen, but of course, you had to fall in it. You assess yourself for a second, making sure nothing hurts too bad and then you mutter, “Of fucking course.”
You don’t even feel like getting up. If it wasn’t for the fact that the mud in which you’re sitting is freezing, you think you’d sit there until you died. You feel drained, and the weight of the day finally hits you head-on, bringing tears to your eyes.
Or maybe it’s just the embarrassment of walking home with your favourite pair of pants ruined. You don’t even know anymore; too much has happened in just a few hours for your brain to accept to be working anymore. You angrily blink the tears away, knowing you’ll break down the second you step inside your own home.
You can only hope that Jungkook is not going to be there. You hold onto that hope as you get to the building, and when you see the lights are out, the tears win against you. You carefully walk up the stairs – even they are covered in a thick sheet of ice – and surprisingly, you make it to the top unscathed.
You try to unlock the door with shaky fingers, struggling to find the hole through the blurriness of your tears, and you almost consider breaking the door down when it suddenly swings open in front of you.
“Peach?”
You’re aware that you’ve got fat tears rolling down your cheeks. You’re aware that you probably look a mess – you are a mess – but all you can do is stare at Jungkook.
“Is something wrong?” he asks, voice laced with concern as he steps aside to let you in.
You put your bag down, shrugging as he shuts the door behind him carefully, eyeing you as if you’re a specimen of a rare animal that’s going to run if he startles it. You refuse to meet his gaze, refuse to speak lest you embarrass yourself with crying even more. All you do is angrily wipe your cheeks with the back of your hand.
“Hey,” he says, and he puts a hand on your shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
You motion around. “What’s wrong?” You scoff, and out of spite, you force down the wave of tears that is threatening to meet the ones you’ve just dried on your cheeks. “Everything is fucking wrong.”
You glance at Jungkook, and he’s just watching, eyes widened. He seems startled by your outburst, and you think you see him gulp.
“Do you…” he trails off, glancing at the door. You only then realize that he’s clad in his winter coat, and he was probably on his way out when you arrived. “Do you want to talk about it?”
You shake your head no, hating yourself for the way your bottom lip trembles. 
His hand is still on your shoulder, and it slowly slides to your arm. “Did you hurt yourself?” he asks.
He’s only then realized that you’re half-covered in mud.
“I fell on a patch of ice,” you answer.
He makes you turn, assessing the damage. “If you soak your pants in water, I can get the stain out.”
“There’s no power.”
He turns you back around, offering you a small smile as he cocks an eyebrow arrogantly. “Astute.”
You want to punch him so bad, but what you do is laugh, which makes you think you’ve gone crazy.
“Water still runs, though,” he points out. “I’ll take care of it when the power comes back on. Doesn’t even need to be warm. You can save what’s left of the hot water for a shower if you want?”
He says it like a question, and you shrug your shoulders. A new tear rolls on your cheek, and to your surprise, Jungkook dries it with his thumb. He then points to your shoes.
“Take these off. You’re going to take a shower before the neighbours steal the water.”
“I don’t…” you trail off, as he’s just staring at you as if what you were going to say was going to be the stupidest shit he’s ever heard. As much as you want to hate him right now, the way his hand feels on your arm is making the anxiety lessen, until you realize that it’s going to be okay.
You can head to Ria and Nabi’s dorm right after a quick shower.
“M’kay,” you finally accept. “But you can go, you don’t have to stay.”
He shrugs, and when he lets go of your arm, you almost want to grab his hand and put it back there. “I was just going to charge my phone in my car. It can wait.”
You hold his gaze, feeling swallowed by his big doe eyes. It finishes drying the tears on your waterline, and you take a deep steadying breath. “M’kay,” you repeat.
At that he smirks, nodding his head once. He kicks off his shoes as you carefully take yours off, and then he makes grabby hands at you.
“What?” you ask.
“Your coat,” he answers. “I’ll put it in the closet for you.”
You slightly frown. “Why?”
“Because I’m trying to be nice?” When you remain silent, he chuckles. “You think I’m just going to let my best friend’s sister cry when she gets home?”
The words hurt, even though they’re just a statement of what you are to him. “You’re so random.”
He looks somehow offended. “Just give me your coat, peach.” He’s stern, and you have half a thought to mimic him, but you resist. When you hand him the coat, he offers you a grin. “See, that wasn’t so hard.”
Once again you surprise yourself by laughing, and the grin on his lips softens in a way that makes you warm inside.
“You’re annoying,” you whine.
He shrugs as he opens the closet. “Just go take a quick shower. Make sure to soak the pants too.”
“Yes, mom.”
He chokes on a snort. “Oof, no, don’t call me mom.”
You stifle a laugh, but a smile tugs at the corner of your lips. He faces you again, and you startle as he pinches your cheek. You push him off, as all he does is offer you a wide grin that makes dimples appear on his cheeks.
You’ve never really seen those dimples before, not while he’s smiling. You have to force yourself to look away, and as entrancing as they are, you manage to have your gaze drop to a random spot on the floor. “Alright then, I’ll grab my stuff. You can charge your phone while I’m in the shower.”
“All good, I’m at 65%,” he says. “I just checked online, and the power outage will likely last through the night so… figured I didn’t have anything better to do.”
You purse your lips. “Oh.”
There’s an awkward silence before he motions to the bathroom. “Aren’t you going?”
Your cheeks burn, and you nod once before heading towards your room as he snorts behind you, evidently laughing at you. You ignore him, quickly grabbing a change of clothes and bringing them to the bathroom. Jungkook’s moved to the couch, and to your surprise you see him with a book in hand.
“You read?”
The question is out before you realize, and Jungkook’s head snaps in your direction.
“It’s for a class.”
You nod once. “Right.” You then scrape your throat, glance at the bathroom and then settle your eyes on him again. “I’ll be right back.”
He smiles at you, and it’s the last thing you see before you walk into the bathroom, softly shutting the door behind you. Luckily enough, it’s still light enough outside for you to be able to shower without being in the dark, and as Jungkook advertised, there’s still hot water.
You take the fastest shower of your life, not wanting to risk running out of hot water, and then you put your dirty pants in the sink, soaking them in cold water. You put your clean clothes on – nothing impressive, just a pair of black sweatpants with a white t-shirt. You take one look at yourself in the mirror – you look like you’ve gone through hell, but at least you’re refreshed. 
With a steadying breath, you walk out of the bathroom, and your eyes immediately find Jungkook where he’s still sitting on the couch, looking like he hasn’t moved an inch. He glances at you before resuming his attention on his book. You feel awkward, yet you still walk in his direction because, frankly, what else is there for you to do when there’s no power?
“What’s the book about?” you enquire.
He raises it for you to see as you sit next to him. He moves too fast, and all you can see is something about trickle-down economy before the book is back in his lap.
“Looks boring.”
He laughs. “It is. Plus, trickle-down economics is bullshit.”
You nod wisely, even though your knowledge in the economy and business field is little to zero. All you know is that trickle-down economics is what rich people use to defend their actions, which immediately makes it so you don’t trust it one bit.
Eat the rich and all that.
“Right,” you let out.
Jungkook throws you a glance. “Feeling better?”
You don’t know how to answer. Because, yes, you feel somehow better now that you are clean and warmed from the shower, but you’re still very aware that the power is out, you’ve likely failed a midterm, and your date was cancelled.
“Sort of,” you answer, shrugging your shoulders. “Today was just a shitshow.” 
He says nothing, but his big eyes on you entice you to open up to him, making you feel more at ease than you’ve ever been around him.
Maybe because you just need someone to vent to after all.
“Like… I woke up late this morning,” you tell him. “Arrived so late to my midterm that I couldn’t finish. Then realized that I forgot my wallet here and couldn’t eat lunch. Got stood up for a date tonight, and now no power here? This day has been the worst.”
You sit back on the couch after you’ve finished your tirade, and Jungkook just looks at you curiously. You don’t register you’ve called hanging out with Hoseok a date until Jungkook says, “You had a Valentine’s Day date?”
You shut your eyes, pinch the bridge of your nose and exhale loudly. “Sort of. Not really a date.”
“How can it not really be a date?”
You entirely miss the teasing in his voice, mostly because you’re appalled at yourself for the slipping. “It’s just… my friend with benefits, so not a date.”
“Damn, peach,” he says, and he bursts out laughing. You crack an eye open, your heart feeling like it’s been stabbed as Jungkook grins at you. “Didn’t think you were one to have a friend with benefits.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “Why?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugs, and his gaze slides away from you as his brows furrow slightly. “You’re Tae’s sister, and the way he talks about you I just… I don’t know.”
Annoyance creeps into you as you cock an eyebrow. “You shouldn’t listen to what Taehyung says about me. He still thinks I’m twelve.”
Jungkook snorts, and to your surprise, it makes you smile, right as he glances at you. 
“Are you not?”
“Yah!” You punch him in the shoulder, and he laughs as he massages the spot. “I’ll have you know I’m an adult.”
His features turn somber, and he plays with his piercing for a time before he answers. “I’m starting to realize it, trust me.”
In the somberness of his eyes, a spark ignites, and you feel as if electricity is running on every inch of your body. You wish it would run into the building instead, bringing the power back on but unfortunately, you’re the only victim, and all you can do is hold his gaze.
The moment stretches until you grow uncomfortable, and your eyes slide to the Switch under the TV, as if it’ll find solace there.
“Anyway,” you say, scraping your throat. “Apparently there’s still power at the dorms so I think I’ll head over there.”
“You’ll abandon me?” he says, faking offence. “Right when I offered to take care of your pants? The nerves on you.”
You roll your eyes as the awkwardness fades to be replaced by the annoyance Jungkook usually brings out of you. “You’re a big boy, you don’t need me.”
“You sure you want to walk all the way there though? What if you fall again?”
You push him as he smiles wickedly, satisfied that he’s annoyed you. “I hate you.”
“You know what you hate even more than me?”
Your brow creases in confusion. “What?”
He shrugs his shoulders, a smirk growing on his lips. “You’ll have to stay for me to answer.”
You sigh deeply, folding your arms on your chest. You gauge him, watch as his smirk only widens while you ponder staying here. And you don’t even know why you’re considering it in the first place. There’s just something about being able to talk to Jungkook like this, about being comfortable next to him that makes you want to stay.
“Name a single reason why I should stay,” you finally say.
His smirk turns victorious. “I’ll cook something for you.”
“The power is out,” you feel the need to remind him. 
He throws you a no-bullshit look. “Really, peach, you need to find a bit of creativity in your life.”
“What?”
“The stove doesn’t run on electricity, it runs on gas.”
You look up at the ceiling. “How was I supposed to know that, I barely ever cook.”
“I cook!” he bursts, waving the book around. You didn’t realize he was still holding it, and you laugh as the pages flutter around.  “And you usually steal my food, so just let me make something for you tonight.”
You purse your lips, meeting his gaze as he looks at you, faking annoyance. “What do you want to cook?”
“I have chicken that I need to cook tonight if I don’t want it to go bad,” he says. “I can make noodles with it.”
It takes you all but two seconds before you realize that there’s no way you’re going to leave when Jungkook is suggesting to cook for you. “Alright.”
“Yeah?” You nod, and Jungkook beams. “You won’t regret it.”
You laugh, slightly shaking your head as he puts the book away and gets up. He offers you his hand, the one with the tattoos on the back of it, and you furrow your brows. “What?”
“Go get changed,” he says, hand still extended between you. “I’ll give you a Valentine’s Day date, but you’re going to have to play the part too.”
Something stops in your chest – your heart, most likely – and you’re hit with the thought that this is a bad idea. That whatever Jungkook means by that is going to be the mistake of the century, yet you still find yourself accepting his extended hand.
He pulls you to your feet, and he doesn’t let go of your hand for a moment, big doe eyes widening slightly as he looks at you.
“You…” you trail off, scraping your throat as you look away from his eyes.
It’s all you can do not to get lost in his gaze. 
“I?” he presses, voice low.
“You should dress up too,” you mumble, cheeks burning. “So I’m not alone.”
He lets go of your hand, and your fingers twitch as it falls to your side. When his index finds your chin, you think your blood stops in your veins. He makes you tilt your head back, enough so that you’re forced to meet his gaze.
“I will.” His voice is grave, and you don’t miss the way his eyes dart to your lips once as they part. “I’m going to make this worth it. You deserve it after such a shit day, don’t you?”
You gulp. “Yeah?”
He pats your cheek. “Yeah, you do.”
And then he’s walking away. You’re left standing there, heart racing in your chest, feeling so warm you think you’re about to catch fire. You watch him disappear into his room, and it’s only when he’s out of sight that you manage to move, making your way to your own room.
You shut the door behind you, resting against it as you take deep breaths to calm down. You’re not sure if it’s doing you any good, because this is Jungkook. Jungkook, with his tattoo sleeve and piercings, your older brother’s best friend. Your roommate, the man that’s been playing with you for weeks, for months, like you’re just some playdough. You think he’s doing it on purpose. He has to – he’s trying to make your life miserable because you’re Taehyung’s sister. You don’t see what else it could be. Because why the fuck would Jungkook act like this with you?
You’re not stupid enough to believe it isn’t your fault. Because you were there the night of The Incident, and you reckon things have changed with Jungkook since that night. 
You take a deep, steadying breath before pushing up from the door. No matter what it is that is making Jungkook act like this, you’re still curious to see what he’s preparing for you. Spending time with him like this, with no power and nothing else to do than talk…
Maybe it’s going to help you understand what’s happening in that thick skull of his. So you search for something to wear, something warm since the heating is also down. You settle on brown dress pants that you know make your ass look amazing, and you pair them with a pale beige wool turtleneck. You tuck the shirt in your pants, putting a belt on to make sure it stays in place, and then you take a good look at yourself in your standing mirror. Satisfied with your outfit, you make to move out of your room, but you stop with your hand halfway to the knob.
You can hear Jungkook humming in his room, a soft melody that’s making you think he’s taking a long time in there. Is he actually dressing up? It makes something terribly warm and soft settle in your chest, and you turn back around, grab your makeup pouch and head to your desk.
If this is a date, or whatever it is that Jungkook considers dates to be, you want to look good for it. So you put a little bit of makeup on, trusting your instinct to make it look great even though the light of your small mirror doesn’t turn on since there’s still no power. You hear Jungkook get out of his room before you’re done, and you hope he doesn’t decide to come here.
You doubt he would, but you somehow feel awkward as you’re getting ready. Because he’s your older brother’s best friend, because he’s a college fuckboy, because he’s been making you feel too many things lately – most of them you repress as if your life depends on it. And you think, your life does depend on it. Because nothing can happen between you and Jungkook; you wouldn’t do that to Taehyung. And mostly, you wouldn’t do that to Jungkook, because you know Taehyung would hate him if something did happen.
You sigh. It comes out shakily, a clear indication that you’re growing anxious, and you almost want to laugh at yourself. You want to tell yourself to get a grip, to just play along for things are bound to go back to normality when the power comes back. 
You only stop feeling anxious when Taehyung texts you, your phone lighting up where you’ve put it down on your desk.
[5:02 pm] bröther👽: jk texted me the same thing! Glad u won’t be alone tonight [5:02 pm] You: he’s gonna cook dinner [5:03 pm] bröther👽: lmao, jk doesn’t cook for girls, feel lucky
With that you realize that, indeed, you should feel lucky. Because Jungkook can be a friend, if not anything else. It’s reassuring, and you finish getting ready feeling lighter than you’ve felt all day, as if the hell that today was is all forgotten. 
You spray some perfume on the inside of your wrists, dabbing it on your neck before you finally declare yourself ready to head out of your room. You hope Jungkook won’t make fun of you – he’d be the kind of guy to make fun of you for this, you just know it – and you make your way to the kitchen, where you can hear him busying himself.
He’s brought his portable speaker out of his room. The one that also has a projector in it, and it shines northern lights on the walls and on the ceiling of the kitchen, giving it a cozy atmosphere. No music is playing as of right now, yet Jungkook is still humming, voice low yet melodious.
You rarely hear him sing, but anytime you do, you feel like your ears are blessed by an angel.
He reappears from where he was hidden in the fridge, and his mouth falls open as he catches sight of you. 
He’s wearing a white dress shirt. You think it’s made of linen – it doesn’t look particularly fancy. Yet the way he’s rolled it on his forearms is weirdly attractive, even though he’s only wearing grey sweatpants with it. It’s a look, a look you think only he can pull off. He’s taken the time to style his hair back, and he’s put on earrings you’ve only seen him wear a couple of times during parties.
He eyes you up and down, his doe eyes crinkling in appreciation. “You look good, peach.”
The compliment makes you blush, and you offer him a small smile. He echoes it right away, and he holds up a bottle of rosé that you bought two months ago and forgot all about since then.
“Wine?” you let out as you stop in front of him. You feel awkward because, obviously, it’s wine, but you still hold his gaze as he nods.
“It’s yours but…” He shrugs, glancing at the label. “I figured it’d work well with the chicken.”
You nod once. “Sure, we can drink it.”
It makes him happy. You can see it in the way he beams, and then he puts it down on the counter with the rest of the ingredients. When he moves, you catch a whiff of his cologne, and you feel your cheeks burn again. You glance outside – the rain has stopped, but grey clouds are still looming in the sky as the world slowly darkens. You wonder if they’ll go away some time tonight – without the light pollution, you reckon you’d be able to stargaze.
You end up helping Jungkook with the cooking, chopping some vegetables as he takes care of the meat. You’re not particularly hungry, so you take your time, talking about everything and nothing. Jungkook is good at this, you realize. He’s good at changing your mind, at making sure it doesn’t wander back to your midterm and to the rest of your shitty day. He makes you laugh, cracking stupid jokes whenever you do something, smirking at you when you roll your eyes.
Being with him like this also makes you understand why he’s Taehyung’s friend. He feels more natural this way, less fuckboy-ish, and it’s a side of him you’ve never really seen before.
You sit at the kitchen table, sharing a glass of the rosé wine while the food simmers on the stove. Jungkook’s put on an indie music playlist before you started cooking – something you teased him about. Who knew Jeon Jungkook likes indie music?
“How was Tae before college?” Jungkook asks all of a sudden when there’s a lull in the conversation. “He barely talks about high school.”
You know the exact reason why, and her name is Youna. Taehyung’s ex, his high school sweetheart. The one that moved to the other side of the country without ever once looking back.
“He was an idiot,” you answer, and Jungkook laughs. “No, seriously. He dated the same girl all through high school. Was convinced he was going to marry her.”
“That sounds on brand with Tae,” Jungkook says, nodding his head wisely. “He said that about every girl he’s dated in college, but most of them don’t last more than a few weeks.”
You wince. “Remember Hailey from last semester?”
She lasted about three weeks, but she spent most of those at the apartment. It was the only three weeks where Jungkook and you had talked more than just small talk – or his usual teasing. Mostly because you kept complaining about her, and Jungkook kept saying you were cute when you were mad.
Come to think of it, it still was teasing.
“Fuck, her voice,” Jungkook lets out, shaking his head. “I’m sure she was faking having such a high voice. I don’t know how Taehyung could deal with that.”
It’s your turn to laugh, and Jungkook smiles as he watches you. “I swear to God, I was about to kick Tae out of the apartment,” you say. “I’m glad she didn’t last.”
“Agreed.”
There’s another silence as the song switches on Jungkook’s speaker. You take a sip of wine, appreciating the taste, and Jungkook gets up to check the food on the stove. He comes back a moment later, sitting back next to you.
You think he’s closer. He feels closer, and the smell of his cologne fills your nose again. 
“You put on some cologne,” you state, and it startles you somehow. You weren’t expecting to say that and, clearly, Jungkook wasn’t expecting it either.
“Yeah.” He looks down at himself as if the cologne is visible on him. “Do you like it?”
You gulp. “Yeah, you smell good.”
He smirks, nodding his head. “You too, peach. I love the vanilla scent.”
You don’t know what to do with the compliment. You mutter a thank you before taking a large sip of wine, and Jungkook chuckles before following your lead.
“Do you think Tae and that girl in France will last?” you ask. “He still hasn’t told me who she is.”
Indeed, he’s remained evasive whenever you’ve asked. You stalked the people that are with him on the semester abroad, and you think two of the girls could be your brother’s type, but it’s hard to tell.
“Oh,” Jungkook lets out. He grabs his phone, resting his forearms on the table as he opens it. He goes on Instagram, and as it loads, he glances at you. “He’s told me. Let me show you.”
“What!” you exclaim. “How come he told you and not me?”
Jungkook chuckles. “No idea. But here.”
He shows you the girl’s profile, and you take his phone as you scroll through the pictures. To your surprise, she’s not one of the two girls you stalked. She looks shy, barely showing her face in her pictures, most of them being of nature anyway. Come to think of it, you do get a romantic vibe from her feed, and you reckon that would work well with Taehyung. 
You’re about to give Jungkook his phone back when it vibrates in your hand, a notification appearing at the top. 
[6:05 pm] Shelly 💦🍒: are u gonna be here soon?
It’s not your fault that you read it, and your gaze widens as you look up from the device. Jungkook hasn’t noticed, and he smiles at you, seemingly expectant.
“So?” he asks.
“You had a date tonight?”
His mouth falls open. He looks guilty, eyes widening and taking a sheepish expression. He remains silent, and you can almost see the cogs turning in his head as he thinks of what to answer.
You don’t know how to feel. You feel bad for the girl – Shelly – who’s clearly waiting for Jungkook somewhere. You feel bad that he chose to stay with you because you were upset, but mostly you feel strange that he’s doing all of this for you when there’s someone waiting for him. 
The emojis next to her name are enough of an explanation of what she is to Jungkook. Still, you feel increasingly uncomfortable, even more so as he says nothing.
“What the fuck, JK?”
“She’s no one,” he says when you get up. “Trust me, I’ve only hung out with her a couple of times.”
You laugh, and it’s somehow void of joy. “Why would I care?”
He looks at the glasses of wine, and then at the food on the stove. “I don’t know… because we’re…” He motions between you, and then at said glasses of wine and food. “I just forgot to tell her I wasn’t going to come over.”
It’s enough of a reminder that Jungkook, for all his current kindness, is a renowned college fuckboy. It reminds you of all the times you’ve heard him fuck – was Shelly one of the girls? You feel disgusted, and you walk out of the kitchen, not wanting to look at Jungkook right now.
“Peach,” he says as he follows you out in the darkness of the living room.
The living room is also strangely cold, and you shiver as you turn towards him. “What?”
“I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “But why are you even reacting like this?”
You scoff. “I don’t know, Jungkook, you tell me.”
You can’t see his expression. But when he takes a step closer to you, you feel the heat of his body radiating in the space between you.
“Are you jealous?” he asks, and you hear the smirk in his voice.
“No,” you say, and you scoff again. “I’m weirded out.”
“Because I was going to fuck someone tonight?” It’s his turn to scoff when you remain silent. “Weren’t you going to fuck that dude? Hoseok?”
You don’t know how he remembers Hoseok’s name, but he’s got a point. You wet your lips, tongue poking your cheek next. “Right.”
“Come on, peach, just come back in the kitchen,” he says. He grabs your hand, and your breath gets caught in your throat as he escorts you back to the chair where you were sitting. You begrudgingly follow, and when you’re seated he towers over you.
You tilt your head back. “What?”
He flicks your nose, and you dodge a second too late. “You’re cute when you’re jealous.”
“Fuck off,” you grumble. “I wasn’t jealous I was just weirded out.”
He smiles at you wickedly. “Of course, peach. Of course.”
He sounds so cocky you want to hate him, but all you can do is glare at the table. He pushes your wine glass towards you as he sits back next to you and you wordlessly take it to chug it.
“Now that that’s done,” he says once you’ve put it back on the table, “what do you think of Tae’s girl?”
You had all but forgotten why you were holding Jungkook’s phone in the first place. You recall her Instagram to the forefront of your mind, pursing your lips. 
“She looks chill,” you answer.
Jungkook pouts. “Just that?”
You shrug. “What else am I supposed to say?”
“Well,” Jungkook starts. “For one I can’t believe she’s Tae’s type. She looks nothing like the girls he dated here. Like just think about Hailey?”
You just nod, because in truth you fully agree with him. 
“Her Instagram is a vibe though,” Jungkook continues. “Tae is big on vibes so… maybe it works?”
You nod once more, tilting your head to the side as you really think about it. Because frankly you’d like for Taehyung to find someone that lasts. As much as you know he’s been having fun in college, you know his happiness usually lies in a healthy relationship like the one he had with his ex. 
“Hopefully it does,” you finally say. “Tae deserves it.”
Jungkook looks at you, somber expression on his features as he plays with his piercing. It makes your heart cease in your chest, and you busy yourself with refilling the wine glasses as he remains silent.
“He does,” Jungkook eventually replies. “He actually really does.”
He sounds so serious you throw him a questioning glance. “Yeah?”
He blinks once, as if stepping out of a daze before flashing his infuriating smirk at you again. “Definitely.”
There’s an awkward silence, and you watch as he takes a sip of wine before getting up to check on the food. He deems it ready, and makes two bowls, one for you and one for him. He sets yours in front of you, a proud smile on his lips.
“Smells good,” you compliment him as he sits.
He winks at you. “Wait till you taste.”
You have to resist the urge to roll your eyes, and you take a tentative bite, holding his gaze as he expectantly waits.
“Shit,” you let out, and you fan your mouth with your hand. “Why is it so spicy?”
“Don’t tell me you’re like your brother and can’t stand spicy food,” he complains as you take a long sip of wine.
You put your wine glass back down, wincing as it clinks against the bowl. It fortunately doesn’t break, and you push it away from the dish as you chuckle. “What’s wrong with not liking spicy food?”
He pouts. “You guys are so weak.”
You fake-glare at him. “This shit is so spicy it would wake the dead.”
He snorts, stifling his laugh until you meet his gaze and you burst out laughing at the same time. You think it’s the first time you’ve ever heard him guffaw like this. His laugh is contagious, pretty, and you’re convinced it can have healing effects.
You’re convinced it has healing effects. Indeed, in that instant, you finally really forget about the day, the heaviness it left behind dwindling into nothingness. It’s replaced with happiness, and chatter with Jungkook becomes easier, more natural. 
You realize he smiles a lot. You make him laugh a lot too, and whenever he does you feel your heart flutter in your chest. You don’t like the feeling, know it’s a mistake, but with the wine, all you can do is try to make him laugh some more, and smile whenever he does.
You’re on your first beer after finishing the wine – and the overly spicy food, which Jungkook congratulated you profusely for finishing. You’ve talked about every subject that’s come to your mind so far, none feeling taboo with Jungkook. He eventually tells you about Shelly – she is indeed one of the girls you’ve heard him sleep with – and you laugh as he admits he’s really happy he didn’t have to see her tonight.
You can’t help but snort. “Jeon Jungkook, saying no to sex? I’ve heard everything.”
“Bruh.” He laughs, shaking his head. “Is your opinion of me so low you think sex is the most important thing to me?”
His eyes are gleaming with mischief in the light of his speaker, which will apparently run out of battery soon. You both don’t care, and you’ve lit a candle in case it does die. Its sweet fragrance has been chasing the smell of the food away, and it’s been giving the kitchen a homey vibe, even as it’s growing chilly.
“Is it not?” you tease.
He rolls his eyes, shaking his head at you. “Not at all.”
You throw him a no-bullshit look that makes him frown cutely. 
“How long can you go without having sex?” you ask him, holding in a laugh.
He narrows his doe eyes at you. “At least a few weeks.”
“A few weeks? That’s nothing!”
“Yah,” he bursts, and he laughs as you snort. “Peach, just because I have casual sex doesn’t mean I can’t stop if I want to.”
“Then stop,” you challenge him.
He cocks an eyebrow. “Give me one reason why I should.”
“To prove a point?”
His eyes narrow further, but if you’ve understood one thing about Jeon Jungkook, it’s that he doesn’t step down from a challenge. No, as competitive as he is, you’re pretty sure he’ll do it.
“Peach,” he purrs, and it has something warm form in the pit of your stomach. “Is it really about me proving a point, or is it about you being jealous?”
You choke on the sip of beer you were taking, which only makes him laugh. You think it’s a little condescending, but you know he doesn’t mean it in a bad way. You still punch him in the shoulder for it, unable to resist.
“Why would I be jealous?” you ask. “Hobi fucks me good.”
Jungkook shuts his eyes and his nose scrunches. He shakes his head once before looking at you again. “I didn’t want to know that.”
You smile as if you’ve never done anything wrong in your whole life. “Your loss.”
He laughs at that, gaze dropping to the table. Silence grows between you, but it’s comfortable, not like what silence with Hoseok feels like. With Hoseok you feel the need to speak whenever there’s a lull in the conversation but, right now, you’re content with just sitting back in your chair, sipping on your beer.
To your surprise, Jungkook starts singing over the song, gaze lost in his own glass of beer. His voice settles deep inside of you, resonating in your soul, and you just look at him, awe clouding your mind.
You’re not sure he’s realized he’s singing. Because when he meets your gaze, he lets out a small laugh. “Why are you looking at me like this?”
“You have a beautiful voice,” you whisper.
It’s hard to tell in the dim light, but you’re pretty sure his cheeks have turned pink. “Nah.”
“No, I’m serious,” you insist. “I often hear you hum and… you sing really well.”
His nose scrunches up again. “Stop it.”
“Just take the compliment,” you say, laughing as he plays with his piercing.
You reckon it might be the first time in your life you’ve ever seen Jeon Jungkook shy. Because he clearly is, and he looks away from you, running his hand through his hair. It undoes the hairstyle, and a strand falls on his forehead.
You’ve never felt such a visceral need to brush your hand through someone’s hair before. You manage to resist, busying yourself with holding your beer instead.
“M’kay,” he lets out. “Thanks, peach.”
His voice is soft. Softer than the fur of a puppy, and it makes the warm thing in you grow. You gulp, wetting your lips. You don’t miss the way his eyes glance at your mouth, and he looks conflicted for half a second before he smirks again.
“We should have hung out like this before,” he declares.
“Yeah?” is all you can answer.
You feel yourself leaning in. You haven’t even realized how close you’re sitting to him until you’re leaning in. He does too. He leans forward, tilting his head to the side slightly. He looks surprised, even more so when one of your hands finds the back of his neck, pulling him closer until you’ve erased the distance between you.
You both didn’t close your eyes. And you both look startled from your lips touching, so much so that you let go of him, straightening away from him. He, on the other hand, hasn’t moved, and his gaze goes fully serious before he grabs your arm gently, pulling you closer to him again.
This time, when your mouths meet, you shut your eyes, sighing softly as he kisses you. His piercings press into your lower lip, and as his mouth moves against you, you feel the warm thing inside of you grow so big it bursts. It bursts the same way fireworks do – in an explosion of colours that leaves you waiting for more.
He doesn’t disappoint. He tilts his head to the side, deepening the kiss. His hand on your arm moves up until it rests on your shoulder before he decides better and moves it to the side of your neck. His thumb swipes at your jaw, gently, and it’s his turn to sigh in the kiss.
When his tongue darts out of his mouth, you meet it with your own. For a reason unknown, you expect it to make you both grow horny, but the kiss remains soft, slow like you have all of eternity stretched out in front of you.
Even though it’s languid, even though it’s soft, you grow dizzy, head spinning as you taste the beer in Jungkook’s mouth. As his hand moves to the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. You rest one hand on his chest, right above his heart, and you feel the organ racing under your fingers. It makes you grab a handful of fabric as if that will anchor you in the present.
As if that will make you forget that you’re kissing your brother’s best friend. 
It does, though you reckon it might be the way Jungkook shifts in his chair, moving so that you can straddle him. And he pulls you in, softly, tugging on your arm until you let go of the shirt and drape it over his shoulder. You sit on him, legs on each side of him, your toes barely even touching the floor. Still, your mouths move in unison, his lips petal soft against yours. 
Your other arm circles his neck too, until you’re holding him against you. His large hands land on your waist, gently, and his thumbs stroke you, barely even grazing you over the thick fabric of your wool turtleneck.
You don’t know how long you kiss. It just seems like you both don’t want to stop, like you both know the moment you stop will be a wake-up call, one you’d rather avoid while you get stuck in this bubble of eternity with him. The fireworks keep on shining bright, warm summer sun blooming in your heart as if this, this was always meant to be.
Oxygen is futile when you’re kissing Jeon Jungkook. Not needed, as if he breathes air into your lungs. You think he does, and you sigh once more as your hands get lost in the hair on the back of his head.
The next swipe of his tongue is sharper, carries more intent, and you both startle, finally parting from each other. Though you remain a hairsbreadth away, longing for his lips the moment your mouths aren’t connected anymore.
Immobile, you breathe in shakily, and you hear him do it too. He’s still stroking you, gently, and he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you in. You rest your head on his shoulder, breathing in the clean laundry smell of his shirt, along with the scent of his cologne as you turn your face towards his neck.
The moment stretches some more, as you listen to the music. His grip around you loosens as you press a soft kiss on the mole you’ve discovered on his neck. He pushes you back, gently, until your back is against the table. Your gazes meet then, and you wonder if his eyes always shine like this. Do they always hold the light of the universe in them, or did you set fire to his gaze?
He gulps and his mouth falls open. His pupils fill with something you can’t quite put your finger on, yet it has clouds taking over the summer sun in your heart until the beating organ goes cold.
“Now you’ve had a fake Valentine’s Day kiss,” he murmurs, and the fireworks burst into a void that tastes like ash as you interpret his gaze.
He’s regretting this. It takes over all of his features, turning his big doe eyes into hearths of remorse. It finishes dousing the sun in your heart until the star goes to sleep, and all that’s left is the echoes of what once was.
“Fake?” is all you manage to let out.
He shuts his eyes, eyelids fluttering close softly. He looks like an angel repenting as he rests his forehead against yours, forcing your own eyes shut from the proximity.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he reminds you, reality sinking into his words. 
You nod against him before pulling away. You try to get up, but his hands on your waist hold you in place.
“Let me go,” you whisper. 
He does so, albeit reluctantly, arms falling to his sides in a defeated manner. You try to not let yourself think about it too much, try to forget what just happened as you stand up, moving away from him.
Without his body heat you shiver, and you hate yourself for the next words you say.
“We should share a room tonight. It’s going to be cold.”
His eyes shoot open as he turns his head towards you, surprise replacing the reality. As if he thought he ruined everything, and you think maybe he did. Maybe he did ruin everything, but you don’t even want to be thinking about it right now. You just want to go to sleep, to let the night pass.
Maybe the insanity will go with it.
“Are you sure?” he asks.
You shrug your shoulders. “You know, Taehyung doesn’t have to know everything.”
Jungkook slowly gets up, facing you. You gulp as he pushes a strand of hair behind your ear, hand going to your chin again. He leans in, forcing you to tilt your head back until his lips find yours again.
It lasts a fraction of a second, yet it leaves you scrambling for breath as he takes a step back. He nods as you meet his gaze, an eyebrow cocked in question.
“We can sleep in your room,” he says. “It’s smaller, it’s going to be easier to keep it warm.”
Right as he finishes his sentence the battery of his speaker dies, and silence surrounds you as the northern lights go to sleep. The light flickers in time with the flame of the candle, and you glance at it.
“Sounds good,” you agree, and you wet your lips as you look at him again. His big doe eyes still shine even with just the candlelight, and you wish the world was different. Wish that he wasn’t Tae’s friend, that you could just grab him and have him kiss you stupid again. But he’s right. You shouldn’t be doing this.
Sharing a bed is only practical. Only because it’s cold, and you have to survive the night. A voice at the very back of your mind tells you that you could head over to the dorms, but you don’t want to.
You want to remain here, in this instant outside of the linear timeline of your life.
“Maybe you should get your bed covers?” you suggest. “So we don’t get cold.”
He smiles, so far from his usual smirk and grin that you feel a pang in your chest. “Yeah. Yes, that’s a good idea.”
All of five minutes later, he meets you in your room. You’ve changed into your previous outfit, and he’s swiped his dress shirt for an oversized white Nike t-shirt. He’s holding his bed cover to his chest, just a white bundle that he offers you as if he’s trying to make peace with you. You motion to your bed, and he nods before walking over to it.
You shut the door behind him, turning to look at him as he debates for a few seconds where to sleep in your bed. He starts by putting his bed cover over yours and then chooses to sit at the foot of the bed, on the side that’s against the wall.
He then turns to meet your gaze, his profile cast in the flickering light of the candle from the kitchen and the few others you’ve lit while waiting for him.
“I think this is the first time I’ve been in this room since Jimin moved out,” he tells you, and his lips stretch into that same soft smile.
You glance around, pursing your lips. “Hope it doesn’t disappoint.”
“It doesn’t,” he reassures you as he imitates your action, observing your room. “It feels like you.”
Not knowing what’s that supposed to mean, you cock an eyebrow. “Does it?”
“Yeah.”
He doesn’t explain further, and you shrug it off as you move closer to your bed to sit on the edge. The moment you’re in his vicinity your heart picks up in your chest. It’s hard to believe that Jeon Jungkook is in your bed right now, and you have to remind yourself that it’s purely because it currently is freezing in your apartment. 
“Should we…” you trail off, motioning at the bed.
He chuckles, a sweet sound that forces you to gaze at him, eyes widening as your heartbeat picks up even more. “You want me in your bed so bad, do you?”
You short-circuit, flushing fully red as you struggle to find something witty to reply with. Falling short on words, you end up shrugging your shoulders as you move under the covers, hoping he won’t tease you further. 
You highly doubt you’d survive him teasing you more.
To your relief, Jungkook ends up chuckling again, but he remains silent as he slides in next to you, keeping a safe distance between the two of you. You lie on your back, while he turns to face you, and you feel the weight of his gaze on your profile.
It makes you turn to look at him, and he offers you the same kind smile.
“Shouldn’t we blow the candles out?” he asks, and his gaze darts to where you’ve left the candles on your desk and night table. “Just to make sure we don’t burn the building down.”
“You want to go to sleep right away?”
You hate yourself for saying that. Indeed, a smirk grows on his lips and he jumps on the occasion to say, “You want to do something else?”
Something grows hot inside of you, and it’s not that same summer sun he ignited in you earlier. You wet your lips, burning from the inside out as you remind him, “We shouldn’t.”
He chuckles again. “Didn’t you say he doesn’t need to know?”
You meet his gaze, find the mischief behind his big doe eyes and roll yours. “You’re annoying.”
Right on cue you shiver. It takes you by surprise, because you feel your insides burning, yet the temperature in your room is low, winning against the warmth.
“Are you cold?” he asks, no traces of mischief left in his eyes. Only concern can be found in his pupils, and you want to hate him for it.
“A little,” you admit. “The covers are just cold.”
They actually are, as your bodies have yet to warm them. To your surprise, Jungkook sidles closer to you. 
“I can hold you, if you want. I’m always too hot.”
You burn a thousand shades of red as you wet your lips. “You don’t have to.”
“Come on, peach, I won’t let you freeze while I’m right here.”
Yet he doesn’t do anything, waits until you’ve nodded your head to slide even closer, and he loosely wraps his arm around your waist. His warm breath fans the side of your face, and you do your best to ignore it.
“Better?” he asks, voice low as he whispers in your ear.
You shut your eyes as electricity courses through your whole body. “Yeah.”
“Good.”
Your brain zeroes in on the weight of his arm on you, and when his fingers start tracing random figures on your waist, you let out a small yelp.
“That tickles,” you tell him.
He does it again, and you try to push him away. Only, Jungkook is far stronger than you, and all you manage to do is end up with your back against him as he holds you firmly to him.
“Stop,” you beg, a little breathlessly.
“It’s warming you up, is it not?”
You roll your eyes, though you reckon it is. You don’t feel nearly as cold anymore, and you can feel the heat growing in you again. As an attempt to get away from him, you shuffle, and it earns you a breathless chuckle from him.
Just to make sure you didn’t imagine the whole thing, you move your hips again. Something twitches in his sweatpants and your mouth falls open.
“You’re…”
“Consequences of the position,” he’s quick to say. “Don’t worry about it.”
You don’t know how you possibly can not worry about it. It’s all your brain can focus on as you shift again, and this time he hisses.
“Maybe you should not do that.” His voice is low, husky, and it sends shivers all over your body. 
You bite your lips. “Why?”
He pulls you back in, flush against his chest. His lips ghost on the side of your neck, and you think you’ve been struck with lightning. “Because we can’t do anything about it.”
“Right.”
He rests his head on the pillow behind you again, sighing deeply. His hand holds you against him, forcing you to feel every inch of his hard body pressing into you.
Of his hard dick too, where it pushes into your ass.
“Maybe we should go to sleep,” you say, eyes fluttering shut.
He nods. “We should.”
“I need to blow out the candles.”
His arm loosens around you before he fully lets you go. You prop yourself on an elbow, leaning towards the night table. You blow out the candle you’ve left there, and before you can move you feel Jungkook’s palm resting on your hip.
“Shit, peach,” he whispers.
You look behind yourself. Your position is explicit, as if you’re angling yourself to fuck yourself on him better. It makes you move your hips, and you see the moment something snaps inside of him.
“Why don’t you lie down next to me before we blow the rest of the candles out?”
There’s something stern, authoritative in his voice, and you immediately obey him. 
“On your back,” he adds.
You exhale shakily as you turn, not daring to disobey. His hand lands flat on your stomach, and he starts drawing circles around your navel. You inhale sharply as he nudges your cheek with his nose.
“You look stressed.”
“What are you doing?”
You hear the smirk in his voice when he says, “Helping you fall asleep?”
“Jungkook…”
“Peach.”
You fall silent as he keeps tracing circles. He sighs next to you, almost longingly and he rests his forehead against your temple. His lips are so close you think you feel their softness on your cheek.
“You’re driving me crazy,” he whispers. His fingers still on you, under your navel. Some inch or so over the band of your sweatpants and he pushes your shirt up before resuming his actions directly on your skin.
“We really shouldn’t…” you trail off.
“Are you going to be able to sleep?” he asks.
It’s rhetorical – he knows just as well as you that you won’t. “No.”
“It could help you sleep.”
You don’t want to know what the ‘it’ refers to. “Yeah?”
He wets his lips, or maybe he plays with his piercing. But from the proximity, you feel his tongue and you think you’re going to die right then and there.
“Doesn’t it help you sleep when you touch yourself?”
You’re soaking your panties. You’re burning up, caught on fire by every strike of lightning that Jungkook’s words ignite in you.
“Does it help you?” you counter-back, remembering when you heard him watching porn two weeks ago.
“It does. Always sleep soundly after.”
You slowly nod, gulping as his lips close on your jaw, and he sucks gently. 
He’s danger in human form. And he knows what he’s doing, he knows how to weave words to cause your undoing. You think he’s already started weeks ago, the night of the Incident. 
Taehyung is miles away from your thoughts when you say, “You want to touch me?”
He smirks against you, licks at the spot he just sucked on. “Why don’t you show me how you touch yourself?”
He moves his hand away from your stomach, and you moan softly when he parts your thighs open, resting his palm on the one closest to him as he presses it against his hard dick.
“Shit, Jungkook.”
“I know.”
You hate him. You hate him so much you slide your hand between your legs, pressing a circle on your clit.
“Good girl.”
You moan again, yet you stop your ministrations on yourself. “I want to watch you touch yourself too.”
He grunts, grinds his dick in the side of your thigh once more. “You want to see me come?”
“Want you to finger me with your cum.”
You’ve gone insane. You think there’s an asylum out there for you, yet Jungkook only chuckles manly against your jaw. “Peach, I won’t touch you tonight.” You whine, and he sucks on your jaw again. “You can do it yourself.”
He’s mad. So are you, and you untie the knot of your sweatpants so you can slide your hand in. You moan softly as you find your clit, and you dip two fingers inside of yourself before moving back to the bundle of nerves.
“Jerk yourself off,” you tell him. You try to sound commanding, dominant, but your voice is whiny. It earns you a smirk from him as he turns on his back. He takes off his pants and underwear, clearly not as shy as you. You can’t see his dick when you look down as he’s still under the covers, and you gulp as you imagine it.
Feeling bold, you push the covers off, needing to see him. And the sight doesn’t disappoint. His dick is large. Not excessively long, but the girth makes you understand why he’s got girls screaming whenever he fucks them. His tip is glistening with precum, and he runs his thumb on the slit before spreading the precum on his shaft. Large veins run along the length, from base to top, and you’re struck thinking he’s got the prettiest cock you’ve seen in your life.
“Like what you see?” he teases as he strokes his dick once, slowly but with a firm grip.
“Do you want to see me too?”
You really are bold. Far bolder than you’ve ever been with anyone before. Maybe because all of tonight Jungkook has put you at ease, and you think there’s nothing embarrassing about finally living out your fantasy. Especially not when he’s so pliable to it, willing to follow you into the land of insanity.
Scratch that – he’s the one leading to madness.
“It’s only fair if I see you too, no?” he teases with a smirk on his lips as he looks at you with his dark, intense gaze.
“Yeah.”
It’s all you say before you shimmy out of your pants. You don’t miss the way his eyes go to your hip, where you have a large dragon tattoo. He curses under his breath. “Didn’t know you were tatted.”
“Got it last semester,” you answer with a shaky voice.
He smirks up at you. “Hot.”
You gulp, unable to hold his gaze for longer than a few seconds. Shier than him, you keep the panties on. To your surprise, he sits up, runs his hand on the inside of your thigh before he lies down on the other side so he has a view of between your legs. His feet are next to your head, and you angle yourself away from them so that they aren’t in your face anymore.
“Touch yourself, peach.”
You nod, and you draw circles on your clit through the fabric of your underwear. It’s a plain black thong, yet you feel immensely sexy when Jungkook’s doe eyes narrow dangerously as he watches you touching yourself, stroking his dick lazily.
You watch how he touches himself, heart beating out of your chest. You’re on fire, a wildfire raging through you, and you moan softly as you press harder into you.
“Why don’t you touch yourself under your panties, mmh?” he asks, gaze sliding up to meet yours before he goes back between your legs. “Won’t it feel better?”
You can’t resist him. You push your panties to the side, holding them with one hand as you go back to your clit. Your thighs instinctively want to close together, but he holds them open.
“Put your fingers in.”
You do. You push two digits in, arching them as you rub at the sweet spot inside of you. He watches, licking his lips as he increases the pace on his dick. You moan right as he grunts, the sound making shivers course up and down your spine.
“Why don’t you use your vibrator instead?”
You entirely stop moving, digits deep inside of you. “Huh?”
“I’ve heard you use a vibrator,” he explains. “I want to see you bury it in your tight little pussy.”
Your walls clench around your fingers at his crude words, and it doesn’t take any more for you to roll towards your night table so you can grab said vibrator. When you’re settled back in your previous position, you click it on, and the soft buzzing fills your room.
“Wait,” Jungkook says, stopping you before you’ve pushed your panties aside again. “Take this off.”
He pinches the fabric on your hip, over the tattoo, and all you can do is nod once before you do. He licks his lips, looking at you appreciatively through half-lidded eyes. He looks between your legs, where you just know he can see your juices glistening. Before he says anything else, you put the vibrator on your clit, legs twitching as harsh pleasure courses through you.
To your surprise, he moans, a low sound that has your pussy clench hard. Of course he sees, and he’s quick to say, “Put it in, peach.”
You obey, and you let out a breathy sound as you immediately rub your clit with your other hand. The next few minutes are a world of bliss, of pleasure and of Jungkook’s praises and grunts, entwined with your moans. You think your room is burning hot, or maybe it’s just his eyes on you. His balls are tight as he jerks off harder, faster, eyes never once moving away from the spot between your legs, where your vibrator makes squelching sounds as you push it in and out of you.
“You’re doing so well,” Jungkook tells you after you’ve moaned loudly. 
You’re nearing your high, but for some reason, you haven’t been able to hit it yet. His words bring you closer, yet it remains just barely out of touch.
“So fucking well,” he adds, breathlessly, and you notice he’s gripping his dick harder, moving so fast you barely can see his hand, except when it slows on his head with a flick of his wrist. He moans, grunts loudly. “You’re so hot, I’m going to come.”
“Fuck,” you curse as you watch him push his shirt up, and you catch sight of his defined muscles. They contract as he jerks himself off, and you think you’re drooling.
Maybe because you’re so close to hitting an orgasm that you can’t do anything other than drool.
He glances at your face once. You meet his gaze, blood boiling as you see his eyebrows almost touching over his eyes, his mouth slightly agape as he breathes loudly. His eyelids flutter close as his eyebrows bunch up over his eyes even more, and then he moans out something that sounds like your name.
Not ‘peach’. Your full name. It makes your eyes water as you observe him, as you watch how he looks in pain. And then he curses, and your eyes fall to his dick to see white spurts of cum coming out, covering the tattoos on the back of his hand as he keeps moving, never once faltering.
Your walls clench tightly around your vibrator. You think you’re about to come, but the orgasm doesn’t want to hit, evading you frustratingly. Your motions grow inconsistent, the push and the pull of the vibrator clearly not enough for you.
As Jungkook comes down from his high, he surveys you once more, features blissed out from coming. He watches you struggle as his hand stops at the base of his dick.
“Look at the mess I made because of you,” he says, and you moan. He tilts his head to the side, pulls at his piercing, and then stops you. Puts his hand over yours between your legs as the vibrator rests deep inside of you. “Do you need help?”
You feel some of his cum as it spills from his hand to yours. You keep rubbing on your clit, meeting his gaze as he awaits your answer. “Yes.”
He smirks, and you let him grab your vibrator. He pulls it out of you, watches your juice on it with a hungry look on his features before he hands it to you again. “Put this on your clit.”
You obey, and you sigh in pleasure as he covers two of his fingers with his cum, even picking some up where it fell on his abdomen, decorating his defined abs. You know exactly what he’s going to do before he does, and it makes you curse.
He meets your gaze. “Are you on the pill?”
“IUD.”
He smirks. “Good girl.”
And then he pushes his cum-covered fingers inside of you, arching them to expertly play with your g-spot. You cry out, throwing your head back in pleasure. He fucks you with his digits for a while, and you press your vibrator hard on your clit, as if it’s going to make you come faster.
All it does is make you close your thighs on his wrist. He pulls his fingers out, forces you to spread your legs wide open again, and then circles your entrance with one finger.
“It’s so hot, to watch my cum dripping out of you.”
His digits are in again before you can reply, and he fucks you so well, you crash right into your orgasm, walls spasming around his fingers. You moan, loudly so, and tears prick at your eyes as the waves of your orgasm drown everything in you, making you shake with pleasure.
You ride the high for a long time. Longer than you’ve ever had before, and Jungkook whispers filthy praises to you all through it, until you cringe with oversensitivity and turn off the vibrator. You put it down next to you, and Jungkook pushes in and out twice more before he pulls his fingers out of you.
You remain silent for a while, both of you regaining your breath. Once you stop feeling like you’re seconds away from passing out, you prop yourself on your elbows, watching him. He’s still looking between your legs, and you instinctively close them.
His eyes shoot to your face, and he smirks. “You have no idea how hot you are with my cum dripping out of you, peach.”
You bite your lip, so hard you think you taste blood. “Shit.”
“I know.”
“What did we do?”
He shrugs, sucking on his piercing. “We made sure we’ll sleep well, that’s all.”
You sigh, nodding once before you lie back down on the bed. “Shit,” you repeat.
This time he laughs. It’s a soft sound, something that makes your heart squeeze in your chest. For some reason, it reminds you of the kiss in the kitchen, and butterflies flutter in your stomach.
Even more so as he says, “Let me go get something to clean you up with.”
He pulls his boxers up and then gets up. You miss the way he winces as his feet hit the cold floor, and he’s back with a washcloth before you’ve had time to realize he was gone.
“I’m sorry, there was no hot water left.”
“Oh,” you let out.
He chuckles as he sits next to you. “Do you want to do it or…?”
You nod, and you grab the washcloth out of his hands before cleaning yourself up. It really is cold, and you wince, one eye shutting as you make sure you’re clean before handing it back to him.
“What do you want me to do with this?” he asks, a teasing tone in his voice.
“I don’t know?” 
He laughs, still grabbing it before throwing it in your hamper. “Did you want to pee before going to bed?”
You nod again. “I should.”
“Are you okay to get there?”
You roll your eyes, finally finding some of your usual defiance. “You didn’t fuck me, Jungkook, I can still use my legs.”
“Right,” he lets out before chuckling. “I’ll wait for you here then.”
The trip to the bathroom is the worst you’ve ever experienced, with how cold it is in the rest of the apartment. You’re pleased that your room is warm when you come back, and your heart squeezes in your chest as you see Jungkook lying on his side, looking at you as you enter and shut the door behind you.
He smiles warmly at you. “Better?”
“Why is it so cold?” you complain, which makes him laugh that cute, giggly laugh of his. You immediately look away from him, not wanting him to see the blush on your cheeks.
You blow the rest of the candles out, and in the dark, you make your way to your bed. You slide under the covers, sighing at how warm they are now.
“I’m glad you stayed,” Jungkook says as you settle next to him.
You gulp. “What?”
“You said you were going to go to the dorms,” he reminds you, even though that was an eternity ago. “I’m glad you didn’t.”
“Oh,” you let out. You’re happy it’s dark because your cheeks burn so much you imagine you’ve turned purple. “I’m glad I stayed too.”
He sighs, and you feel the mattress move as he shifts. “Do you want to cuddle?” he asks. “For warmth.”
You snort, and even though you’re in the dark, you nod. 
“Sure.”
A few seconds later, you’re the small spoon again, and he holds you close to him. He sighs once more, and it ends with a yawn that has you laugh softly.
“Tired?” you tease him.
“Yeah.” He chuckles, nuzzling his face in your hair. “I’m going to sleep like a rock.”
So are you. Even if you shouldn’t, even if you and Jungkook probably committed a big mistake tonight, you still know you’re going to sleep soundly.
Especially as his breathing evens out behind you, interrupted by soft snores here and there. It forms a melody that lulls you to the land of dreams, to a land where you can forget that he’s Taehyung’s best friend, and where you can imagine that he’s yours after all. It’s idyllic, unreal, yet your sleeping form clings to it like it’s a lifeline in a storm.
You just know that reality is bound to hit again soon.
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☆☆☆☆☆
Oooooof yep. They really did that hehehe. What did you guys think? Did you like it? Let me know!!
All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.
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unknought · 3 days
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In 2007 the US Department of Housing and Urban Development started reporting homelessness rates:
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As you can see in this chart (from Statista) there was a fairly steady decrease in the number of homeless people from then until 2016. It flattened out for a couple years in 2017 and 2018, and then rose in 2019 and 2020. No data was collected in 2021 (due to COVID) and the increase from 2020 to 2022 was negligible, so one might hope based on the data from this chart that the upward trend was flipping around, and that by now by now it might be on its way back down, but this does not appear to be the case.
For 2023 the Department of Housing and Urban Development reported a homelessness count of 653,104. This is a dramatic increase which blows previous annual changes out of the water. It's a 12.1% increase relative to 2022, an 18.7% increase relative to the low in 2016, and the highest absolute number of homeless people since data started being collected in 2007.
So this is one way, at least, in which standard economic metrics being up has not translated to people doing well.
An objection one can make here is that even this new high is only about 0.2% of the national population, and while things may have gotten worse for the people in the very worst of economic straits, this doesn't say much about what things are like for the rest of us.
I agree with this up to a point. (Probably not the implied argument about what we should care about but let's not get into that for now.) It's probably true that homelessness rates don't shed a lot of light on how the median American is doing. But I think they are relevant to the well-being of a lot more than 0.2% of the population.
Even though only a small proportion of Americans are homeless at any given time, there a lot more for whom the threat of homelessness looms very large in their financial considerations, not irrationally. More people who are homeless probably means more people who can just barely make rent as long as they skip a few meals, more people who stay with an abuser because they wouldn't have anywhere else to stay, more people who can't quit their job to find a better one because they couldn't afford to miss a month's rent, more people who can't move out of a mold-infested apartment, more people who are just struggling with anxiety about whether they're going to be able to make rent every month. It also almost certainly means more people couch-surfing and more people who were homeless for part of the year that happened not to include late January, neither of which would be counted in the official statistics.
How much of an impact does this end up meaning, on how many people? I'm pretty unsure, but here's a suggestive statistic from the Federal Reserve:
> Challenges paying rent increased in 2023. The median monthly rent payment was $1,100 in 2023, up 10 percent from 2022. In addition, 19 percent of renters reported being behind on their rent at some point in the past year, up 2 percentage points from 2022.
It seems at least very plausible to me that claims about how great the US economy is doing merit a substantial asterisk.
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u once brought up coyotes and i’ve been hooked ever since 😭😭
so how about a cute sexy coyote who’s been seducing the big bad alpha wolf for so long it got so frustrating that he lets it out on her for days (poor baby can’t walk anymore, can she) idk he eventually wifes her up 😂 a cute lovely ending
love uuu and thanks in advance !
Coyotes really aren't all that different from wolves, they move in packs, they hunt similar prey, and the mating seasons are at the same time of year. So really was it that big of a deal that you were hunting on werewolf territory? No right? you were basically cousins. well, that's what you thought at least, and you were wrong.
The alpha of the pack had caught you sniffing around. you had been warned many many times that wolves didn't tolerate completion on their hunting grounds and killed silly coyotes who got too close hunting for rabbits. now here you were darting through the forest as fast as you could with snapping jaws right on your tail. He's already chased you out of the werewolf territory it's not fair why is he still chasing you? no fair no fair no fair.
he catches you, knocking you to the ground and rolling with you through the grass, he lands on top of you his chest to your back. his big hands pinning your wrists. his knees pinning down your legs so you can't kick him. you struggle, but he's so much stronger than you that the act is basically pointless. You buck your hips back trying to knock him off, he lets out a muffled grunt, then a snarl as your ass pushes back against his crotch.
For some reason, this stirred something inside of you, this isn't so different from the play wrestling male Coyotes did as courting. a warmth spreads in your belly. you were still scared, especially with his sharp teeth hovering over your neck ready to rip your throat out. but there was something else string in you. you had been pinned, face down ass up by a strong powerful male with his groin pressing against you, and your heat was starting to hit because of it. you hated how good this felt.
"I'll let you off with a warning if you don't come back," he growled, his voice as deep and low, you wanted to tell him yes you'd be good, please spare your life, but what came out instead was a low moan as you pushed back against him not trying to escape this time. his nostril flared.
"did you go into heat?" he no longer sounds angry but more, surprised.
"I'll never come back if you just fuck me, let me cum," you pant. he growls again, but you can feel him grind against you, matching the roll of your hips.
"Brat. did you come here just so some wolf might pin you down and ruin your cute cunt? what are those coyote boys aren't big enough for you?" he snarls, you can feel his hardening cock against your behind he was bigger than any coyote you'd fucked before. you'd never been so horny before in your life, it's not even going to fit inside of you this big werewolf cock is going to split you right in half and you couldn't be happier.
"say it, say that this is what you wanted all along," he demands, teasing your pussy with the thick dip of his cock. you try to buck back and take his dick inside of you, he grabs the back of your head and shoves your face down in the grass forcing you to say in place. "Say it," he repeats.
"I just want your cock in me, it's all i want please please pl-" Your begging is cut off as his tick cock pushes inside of you. he's so big you feel like you can't breathe. the pain is delicious. you definitely won't be walking after this, you hope he and the rest of his pack take advantage of it.
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WING IT
A/N: we are slowly getting more content, lets just hope something drops soon!
WORD COUNT: 3k
SUMMARY: It's your first day working in Selma's Home, you're nervous enough already, but when an emergency calls your boss away and you're left alone, the situation is topped when famous CEO Harry Styles casually strolls in.
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It doesn’t matter that this job is just an in-between. Something that earns you money until your dream position opens. A first day is always stressful, especially when you have no idea what to do.
You were applying to dozens of jobs at once, just shooting everywhere you could, hoping to get an answer back before your rent was due. Selma’s Home was the first one to invite you for an interview and somehow, miraculously you even got the job despite the fact that you have no experience in retail. You suspect that desperation was a big factor in your hiring, because Selma lost 2 of her employees at once when the young couple that was working for her moved across the country. 
Now here you are, walking into the store, nervously fidgeting with your fingers as you head down the aisles where you see Selma behind the cash register already getting ready to open.
“Hi!” you greet her, her head snapping up at your weak voice. Selma is such a fierce, kind of intimidating woman, but you can see how it helped her to open this store and make it one of the most successful home decor stores in the city, offering tasteful stylish pieces along with practical utility items for one’s home. 
“Oh, hi! Welcome to your first day, you ready?” She even cracks a smile, but somehow it just makes you gulp hard.
“Yeah, readier than ever!” you manage to squeeze out a nervous chuckle, hoping she doesn’t sense your jitters.
“Alright, then let’s get started.”
With an hour until opening Selma is eager to squeeze in as much information into it as possible. She walks you through the store, talking about the most important items, but also handing you a handbook about everything that’s currently selling in the store.
“Use your downtime to roam around and you’ll learn them by the end of the week without the handbook,” she says, eyes running over the shelves as she is talking, already moving to the storage room in the back. 
She talks about the system, how to unload the new arrivals every two weeks and then you move on to the cash register, aka your biggest fear. It’s quite the stress factor to deal with money, making sure everything is neat and correct, you can only hope you won’t mess it all up.
Then the store opens and you follow around Selma to learn the ropes. What’s different here is that whenever a customer comes in you offer them help right away and if needed, you assist them throughout their whole time shopping. There are quite some designer products selling and you’ll need to know everything about them to be able to sell them to the customers just like Selma does.
She is so good at it. No matter who comes in, she so effortlessly talks them into leaving with not only what they came for, but some more as well. She is enchanting, nice, open and warm and you just keep taking notes mentally, though you don’t feel confident enough to be as charming as she can be the moment the bell rings above the door. 
When lunch rolls around you allow yourself to feel relieved for a second that you survived half the day already. Selma sends you to the back to have your lunch and you just sit in silence, staring ahead of you, mustering up all your energy for the rest of the workday. You’ve just finished your sandwich when Selma barges into the breakroom.
“Y/N, there’s a bit of an emergency.”
You jump to your feet, scenarios already running through your mind. Is there a fire? Did the storefront just collapse? Someone stole those hella expensive Japanese tablecloths? 
“What happened?”
“My daughter, she is ugh! Such a menace, she got into trouble at school, so I have to go there. I need you to cover for a bit, just an hour tops, I swear!” 
She is already grabbing her purse, pushing her sunglasses to the top of her head, car keys in hand while you just stand there dumbfounded. Is she actually gonna leave you alone in the store on your first day?
“Selma, I-I don’t…”
“You do, Honey. Just an hour. This is a dead time anyway, if anyone comes in, just try your best to help them and ring them up at the end. Easy, I know you can do it!”
She is storming out and you follow her like a lost puppy.
“B-But what if I mess something up?” you ask, panic setting in. 
“As long as you don’t set the store on fire, you’ll be fine. I trust you, Y/N!”
And with that, she is already gone, the bell rings above the door as you stand there like a statue. 
You watch the storefront in pure panic, your stomach dropping every time it seems like someone is approaching the shop, but no one comes in. 
Until the bell rings above the door. 
For a split second you hope it’s Selma, but looking up you see a tall, broad figure and your heart threatens to burst right out of your anxiety filled chest, at first because hello! It’s a customer! But then as he steps further into the shop and takes off his sunglasses, realization settles in. 
This is not just a regular customer, this is Harry Fucking Styles, CEO of Pleasing Productions, the studio that’s given the world the absolute best romantic movies in the past decades and the man is famously known for being a ladies favorite, but appearing as a total mystery in the media. 
You’ve read about him a lot before, it’s hard not to bump into his name online, thanks to his looks he is always somehow in talk for either having dinner with a model, appearing on the red carpet looking like a fucking snack, or, your personaly favorite, declining giving an answer to a question regarding his private life. 
And now he is standing there, looking around the store. 
It takes a couple of moments for you to push out of this frozen state and finally step forward.
“Hello!”
Wow. Did your voice actually sound like that?
Clearing your throat you keep moving towards him.
“Hi, can I help you with anything?”
You try to rake your mind to remember everything you’ve seen and heard from Selma to use now, but the moment he looks up, your mind goes blank. He is just as beautiful as he looks in pictures or maybe even more. Unlike on those red carpet photos where he is always dressed in designer suits, now he is wearing a pair of simple pants and a gray long sleeve, his hair is a bit tousled and it appears he is growing his beard out, a bit shaggy, but he makes it look very… hot. That’s all you can say looking at him.
“Oh, hey!” He is sporting a polite smile as he looks up, about to keep talking, but he stops for a moment upon looking at you and he stops.
Everything stops. 
It’s as if he is taking you in, you can feel your cheeks heating up, the nervous fidgeting starts again, but you hide your hands behind your back so he doesn’t notice. 
“I’m looking for some kitchen stuff,” he then says, hiding his hands in his pockets. 
“Great!” you breathe out. “We do have… those.”
You flinch internally, but ignore just how awkward you are in his presence. 
You ask him about what he needs specifically as the two of you start walking down the isles and for a moment you think of grabbing the handbook, but that would look awful, so you make a decision on the spot.
You’re gonna just wing it. 
What could go wrong? You’ll just pretend like you’re Selma, confident and know everything about the items, you’re gonna say whatever comes to your mind and just… wing it. 
All while ignoring how attractive this man is up close. And intimidating. And charming. And…
“I think I want to check out the coffee stuff first,” he suggests and nodding you walk him over to the kitchen items.
“Do you have a coffee machine and you’re looking for some accessories, or…”
“I just got one of those old fashioned moka coffee pots,” he says with a boyish smile. “But I want to get that to the next level, if you know what I mean.” You do not.
“Of course,” you smile, eyes scanning over the shelves. 
Your grandmother has one of those old moka coffee makers, but you have absolutely no idea what else could be used for those, so you just start grabbing things and making up what they are used for. 
One after the other, you just keep showing him stuff with no idea what you’re talking about, but the longer you’re talking the more confident you’re growing, especially when he just keeps nodding and humming along to anything you say. 
“So… which one are you more interested in?” you ask at the end of your little speech. You look at him and find him already looking at you with a tiny smile curling up the corners of his mouth. 
“What can you tell me about those?” he asks, ignoring your question and just moving to another shelf. 
He keeps asking about items and you just make up everything as you go. Of course, you know some of the stuff, but you were never really a true chef in the kitchen, so there are way too many items you don’t know that much, but somehow, you’ve gathered enough confidence that even you believe what you say. 
Slowly, Harry fills his basket as you move through the store and every time you look at him you catch him already looking at you with the same smile you can’t quite decipher. 
“What about those?” he points up at a set of plates on the top shelf.
“Oh, those are so pretty! Let me show you them!” you enthuse and run to grab the ladder from the back. 
It’s not the steadiest tool for sure, but you ignore the wobble you feel when you start climbing it.
“Are you sure it’s–”
“It’s fine, don’t worry,” you chuckle, reaching the top step, but your knees are definitely shaking. You focus on grabbing the plates and getting off as fast as possible, but right when you take them off the shelf you already feel yourself losing balance. 
But Harry is quick to come to your rescue. One of his hands grabs the ladder to steady it and the other… the other one grabs the back of your thigh to help you hold yourself up. Until then you were shaking because of the ladder, but now it’s definitely because of his firm hold on you, the warmth of his touch and the thoughts that unrelease when you realize just how perfectly his fingers are digging into your flesh. 
“You good?” he asks in a deep, husky voice. 
“Yeah.” Your voice is barely more than just a whisper as you hold onto the plates as if they could hold you up. 
You start moving down on the ladder, but Harry’s hand doesn’t leave your body, it works up on your hips and waist, grabbing onto your elbow as you finally step onto the ground and even then, he is still touching you, his eyes locked on yours as you’re still holding those damn plates. The image of dropping them and pushing up against him flashes through your mind and your knees wobble again when you catch his gaze flickering down to your lips for a second. 
“The plates,” you blurt out then. He looks down and a smile stretches across his face.
“They really are pretty.”
“Right?” you let out a breathy laugh. 
“Now that you risked your life for them, I guess it’s only fair if I actually buy them.”
Fuck, your heart is about to jump right out of your chest, how is he so smooth?
You gather a few more things and then move to the cash register to ring everything up. 
“How long have you been working here?” he asks, patiently waiting for you to finish. 
“Um… Do you want the truth?” you ask, with a cheeky smile.
“Yeah.”
“This is my first day,” you admit, just as you finish the scanning and when you look at the amount it all added up to, you almost choke on your own saliva. “Um, your total is 1630.”
For a moment you think he’ll question how it’s so much, but without hesitation he whips out his card and taps it on the terminal.
“First day, huh?”
“You wouldn’t have guessed?”
“Oh, I kind of did,” he chuckles and he starts to help you with putting everything away in bags. “You really should learn what the items are used for.”
Normally you’d be embarrassed that he noticed how much you just made up, but the smile he is gifting you with vanishes all negative feelings and you can actually find it funny. 
“I will.”
“Thank you for your assistance,” he smirks, grabbing the bags from the counter. “And if I happen to leave a review about the excellent service, what name should I drop?” 
“I’m Y/N,” you say with a sheepish smile. He then sticks his hand out and you take it.
“Harry. It was really nice meeting you.”
“You too.”
With a final wave he turns around, slides his sunglasses back to the bridge of his nose and then walks out of the store. You stand there completely overwhelmed by the experience and you have no idea how much time passes by before Selma barges through the door.
“Hi Darling! How did everything go?” she beams, walking up to the counter where you’re still standing. 
“Great!”
“Did anyone come in?” 
“Yeah. Harry Styles was just here.” Selma freezes for a moment before looking up at you.
“Harry Styles? As in…”
“Yeah. That Harry Styles.”
“How did it go? Did he buy anything?”
“He spent 1600 dollars on kitchen stuff.”
“Y/N, that’s great!” Selma claps her hands. “Was he satisfied? Could you help him?”
“I think I could,” you say with a knowing smile. “He seemed… satisfied, yeah.”
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The first day jitters are luckily gone by the next day, especially because Selma looked at you with so much pride after you told her about your encounter with Harry that you feel like you can’t do anything wrong. 
Before lunch Selma asks you to rearrange some stuff in the storage and you’re a bit relieved you don’t have to take any customers for now.
But because of that, you’re not out when one specific person walks into the shop. Again. 
Harry enters the store confidently, a smile already on his lips as he looks in the direction of the cash register, but it fades when he only sees Selma, but no sight of you. Selma, on the other hand, becomes ecstatic when she sees and recognizes him.
“Welcome! How may I help you?” she chirps, walking towards Harry, who is still looking around, eyes searching for you. 
“Hey, is the… Is the woman who worked yesterday here? Y/N?” Selma stops, surprised.
“Y/N? Uh, yes, but she is busy now, I’m sure I can help you–”
“I want her,” he states.
“She is still training, I’m sure I can–”
“Look,” Harry sighs. “What’s your name?”
“I’m Selma, the owner,” she states proudly.
“Selma, I’m more than happy to buy everything in this store if it means I get to talk to her. How does that sound?”
Selma stares back at him, finally understanding the situation. Her stance changes instantly.
“Let me go get her for you.”
You’re going over your list in the back when Selma appears, her spotless appearance feels odd in the storage room’s setting. 
“Oh, hey! I just finished with–”
“I need you outside.”
“What? Why?” Panic washes over you, because you can’t read her face and what could she possibly need you for outside on your second day?
“Just come. Now!” She turns around and heads out, not even checking if you’re following her. Of course you do.
“Selma, what did I–” you start mumbling behind her, but just when you step out and spot Harry at the cash register.
His face lights up the moment he sees you and those damn butterflies start raging in your stomach. 
“Harry, you’re here. Again,” you state the obvious. 
“I am,” he chuckles and you see Selma walk away from the corner of your eyes. 
“How, um–What can I… help you with?” you ask, clearing your throat. Why is he here? Could it be… because of you? Yesterday you definitely spent an awful lot of time daydreaming of the way he was touching you on that ladder and you’d be lying if you said you felt disappointed he just walked out, knowing you might never see him again. 
Well, so much for that.
“I forgot to get something yesterday.” 
“Oh,” is all you can say, the disappointment snaking back into your gut. He is not here because of you, how could you even think about that?
Harry’s smile widens as he watches your face drop and then he finally continues.
“Your number.”
Your eyes widen and you must look quite funny, because Harry chuckles at the sight of your expression. 
“Was this too straight forward?”
“No!” you snap right away, maybe a bit too eagerly. “Not at all.”
“Great, then…”
He pulls his phone out of his pocket and hands it over, you type your number in quickly and hand it over. He taps on the screen and a second later your phone starts buzzing in your back pocket.
“Just checking you didn’t give me a pizzeria’s number,” he jokes, making you laugh. “And… now that I’m conveniently here, maybe you can show me some more stuff.”
“What do you need?” you ask as the two of you head down one of the aisles. 
“Hmm, how long is your shift?”
“Um, another four hours,” you scoff.
“Then I guess I’m interested in everything. Whatever takes four hours to look at so I can take you out once you’re done.”
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!
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d4yl1ghts · 1 day
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Hi could I request an Anthony c wife reader fic where they are in a heated argument and Anthony accidentally says he regret marrying reader so she ends up giving him the silent treatment and just ignoring him so he can grovel for her forgiveness
regrets
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(mean?) anthony bridgerton x wife, fem!reader
summary: anthony realises the importance of words
warnings: argument
-
As you trudged down the antique staircase, you couldn’t help but ponder the lack of the presence of your husband recently. He was always locked away in his office and whenever you confronted him, he would always reply with: “I still have more work, Y/N.” After he said that, he would kick you out of his office. You were really missing Anthony currently and you longed for his touch, despite never really enjoying physical touch, you longed for his touch.
And so that is what led you to now, storming into his office, without even knocking. Anthony huffed quietly as he looked up to see you. He held his head in his hands as he stared back down at his pile of paperwork. “What?”, he asked blatantly as he eyed the paper. “Is that all you have to say to me?”, you asked bemusedly. “Yes. You stormed into my office whilst I am working.”, he justified. “Do you only care for your work and business?”, you asked with an upset expression.
“No, it is just so overwhelming sometimes. It is a requirement that I see to all of it as the Viscount.”, he responded as he shuffled in his chair. “Is it not a duty to spend some of your time in the presence of your wife?”, you asked as you focused on the elegant wooden desk, avoiding his intense eyes that often gave away his emotions. “I suppose so. I almost regret marrying.”, he confessed. You simply stared at him. Did he really regret marrying you? Why did he go through all of the effort of making your wedding perfect for you if he didn’t want to get married?
Silently, you forced your feet to carry you back into your bedroom which was fortunately not shared with Anthony. In the past, you would spend your sleepless nights in his room and he would go into yours if he burned for your passion. You slammed the door shut and locked it: to be certain that he would not enter your chambers. You needed to be alone.
It was safe to say that it was yet another sleepless night but he was not there to ease you through it. Amidst the sunlight of the rising sun, you hastily got ready for the day; you requested for your hair to be more simply styled today and your robes less detailed and delicate. Truth be told, you only asked your maids to do your hair gracefully for Anthony, you hated the process and you decided that you would not care about what he’d have to say about your robes: he didn’t need to acknowledge his wife anymore.
You sat at the table in silence whilst you ate breakfast with him opposite you, none of you making eye contact.
You sat on the sofa as you read in silence which felt unusual with out your updates to Anthony and his queries on where you had gotten up to.
You sat in the picturesque garden in silence.
It was not until dinner that Anthony broke the silence. “Y/N.”, he began as you pushed your food away from you like Anthony had you. “I do not know where to begin.”, he continued as he gazed across at you. “When I spoke such words, I did not realise they would be so harmful and impactful.”
You glanced up for a split second and saw the sparkle of sincerity in his eyes before going back to playing with your food. “I know that you will not ever truly forgive me for those unkind words but I hope you will at least know this: I did not mean it like that. In fact, I almost meant the opposite: I feel as though because I am the Viscount I am unable to take care of my wife and spend the needed time with her.”, he stated in one breath. “I almost feel pitiful for my wife: no one should be neglected simply because they are my wife. I just do not know how a woman could love me for I was not made to be a tender husband or a loving father. I was made to be the Viscount. Those are my duties. And so I thought to myself: you deserve so much better and so why should I bother when I cannot give what you require?”, he pleaded with a new sense of vulnerability in his eyes. You knew how hard it was for him to open up and for him to admit to this, you were proud of him.
“Anthony, you are the perfect husband (when you want to be).”, you mentioned teasingly. He let out a teary smile. “And I know that in the future you will be the most loving father to our children. You even admitting to feeling like such proves it.”, you responded as you slowly made your way over to his side of the table.
Once you had reached him, you carefully caressed his jawline as he gazed up at you whilst tears gently rolled down his cheeks. He placed his arms around your neck and pulled you down so he was able to passionately kiss you, conveying his love for you. As he pulled away, he cautiously grabbed your hand and guided you into his room. For the first time in weeks, you slept through the whole night.
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bueckersstrap · 1 day
Text
THROW AWAY
paige b. x reader
master list + playlist here !
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warnings : language, cheating, drinking, sexual content
wc : 2.7k
a/n : this was kinda bad i cant lie 🫥. um also yes i did rewrite iowa v uconn making uconn win😊😊 lmao but anywayyyy chapter oneeee, and were already making plot progress in the slightest!!! i rly hope u enjoy, love u mwahhh - celeste 💘
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I. it ain’t really cheating if she don’t see
other then her not much had happened between the two of you, but you realized a couple months after you couldn’t hold a grudge against azzi. so you swallowed your pride, caught her after a class and apologized for any things you might have said about her or any negotiable feelings that go both ways.
in the end you two became civil again but there was a part of you that could never just shake the feeling you had when you first found out. the way your head pounded, your cheeks flushed pink, the way your palms sweat, or the way your nails dug into the pools of your hands. it was all too much to recover from so instead of letting all these feelings haul you, you ignored them.
for paige, nothing had happened. you were still close friends with some of the girls on their team, such as kamorea and caroline, and hoped that whatever happened between you and paige wouldn’t affect that. you occasionally showed up to their games to cheer on your friends, usually being invited to go celebrate their wins but you never took the opportunity because you knew you’d end up back in the loop with paige.
tonight was different, though.
it was march madness, final four. over the course of the month, you watched almost all of their games courtside, thanks to kk and her family. tonight was iowa versus uconn. there was a lot of discourse on the media about paige and caitlin that you tried to ignore, but you were always reminded of paige somehow.
it was the last four seconds of the game and while trying to set up a screen for kate martin it was called an offensive foul. it had been a tight game, but uconn was still up by one.
paige took two free throws she made the first but hit the backboard on the second. sitting courtside, you saw everything. you especially saw how paige silently kicked herself in that moment for missing. it fuelled something in you and you realized that you could read paige even when she was barely showing any emotion. feelings of disgust and resentment blocked you mind until you heard the red blow his whistle. it was a held ball on iowa.
in a flash of events, aaliyah edward’s bounced the ball of caitlin’s back which she couldn’t manage to keep in. the game was bagged for uconn and with point eight seconds left the game was in uconns favor.
aaliyah threw the ball in the air and the whole team swarmed around eachother, jumping in excitement at their new achievement.
-
after all the celebration had calmed down and everybody was done with their interviews you had caught some of the girls after and congratulated them on their win. you were having a fine time talking to the players that radiated happiness when a laugh you knew all too well cut through the fun lingering in the air. you bit your lip, near drawing blood in stress when you whipped your head to see paige.
the beads of sweat, face read, braids still tight and fixed as ever. you imagine your face must’ve contorted with disgust as you turned back to kk because the look on her face said it all. it said, “clearly you can’t handle being around paige.” you knew it because she said it all the time.
you and kk became friends when she joined the uconn team and soon after got very close. your friendship was something that you held close to your heart because she knew you so well.
“girl, you should totally come to celebrate with us!” kk beamed, “oh- uh. i think i have some work to catch up on, plus my girlfriends still at home,” you tried to seem like you weren’t lying but she obviously saw right through you.
“then do it tomorrow!”
“i’ll be hungover and what about my girlfeind?”
“just bring her! we want to see her again, she’s so sweet” and as kk said this you couldn’t sworn you heard a most minuscule scoff coming from the blond on your right. but before you could stress about that, caroline chimed in, “please y/n! you never come out anymore” earning “yeahs” from the other girls, obviously excluding paige, who now was looking down at her nails.
“okay, okayyy! i’ll come out tonight. send me the details, ill catch yall later,” as soon as the words left your mouth, you regretted it immediately but you didn’t want to back down on your word so you hustled to get ready back at your apartment.
-
KK : ru okay????
also were going to the bar off main street for around likeeee idk 9:30??
you’ve been there before, yk ?? 8:34 PM
you : girl bye i’m stressing!!
also thank you ! 8:40 PM
KK : stop don’t stress
don’t even think about that
ur gonna have a good night
don’t let white girl over there ruin that for u!!!! 8:43 PM
y/n reacted with a ‘❤️’
-
“hi baby,” you placed a peck on your shorter girlfriends cheek, “hi, i missed you!” kate smiled back, “how was the game?”
you explained how amazing it was and how epic aaliyahs last play against caitlin was. then you hesitantly started, “so, kk invited us to go out to party with them, at the bar not to far from here,”
your girlfriends face turned from one of excitement to a neutral, tight lipped expression. in retrospect, you should’ve expected the reaction you got in return or the news because at the start of your relationship, (which was technically because she comforted you during the whole paige problem) she made it clear how she disliked paige and those who associated with ‘such a person’. at first you were upset that she would refer to the girl you were once in love with. but then you soon realized that you had no right to feel this way because that’s just who paige was without all the sugarcoating.
“if-if you don’t want to come- that’s- um- that’s fine.”
“no, no. i’d- i’d… love to.”
she was so clearly forcing her excitement but if you pretending not to notice made her come, you’d do that.
you had gotten ready, you wore blue high waisted jeans and a black tube top. kate wore jeans a sweater that you thought was a little casual but you wouldn’t dare say that to her.
you admitted that you looked extremely good tonight but you didn’t want to look like you looked good for a reason even though you did. your girlfriend might’ve picked up on that because when she saw your outfit, she seemed to have tensed up in an uncomfortable manor.
as horrible of a person you might be, you almost felt embarrassed showing up with her. not because you didn’t love her, because you knew paige knew she was better than her. you always explained to paige how you admired her height and muscularity, qualities that kate lacked. you were 5’5 and your girlfriend was 5’0, a height difference that you in fact did not desire but hey, you can’t win them all!
-
“hey girl!” kk practically screamed, pulling you and kate into a group hug. “hi kk!” you glanced, kate just smiled back.
kk motioned for you two to come and see the girls. you walked over with a bright smile on your face, “hey y/n, hello kate!” caroline was the first to speak, other girls stuck in awkward stage of whether to say hi to kate and you or stay loyal to their teammate.
you smiled at azzi, who was sitting with nika. “i’m gonna go talk to them, babe. you okay?” your girlfriend nodded at you, sitting at the table while you walked over to azzi and nika.
introducing your girlfriend to everybody was fun but everything died down and the group started to do their own thing. you could tell how kate desperately tried to settle in but you could tell she was uncomfortable in the setting. it was hard to see the love of your life ? suffer like that but, it wasn’t her night. and plus, you on the other hand was having the time of your life, still trying to be mindful of kate.
it was long after you and kate arrived and she was being a drag the whole night. you loved her with most of your whole heart but she was just so out of place when you were with the team.
“shots, shots, shots!” you heard paige yell, you had already been drinking too much to make rational decisions so you decided that you would clear the beef with paige just for tonight.
“line em’ up, paigey!” you yelled over the music and erupted a smirk that played on her lips. you realized that smirk was one of pride because when you looked over you saw your girlfriend scoff and roll her eyes. paige lined 6 shot glasses up and poured pink whitney and vodka into them.
the sight of six shot glasses made you nervous, so you tried to seek comfort and glanced at your girlfriend who was now sitting annoyed on the stools beside you.
“m’nervous katieee!”
“then don’t do it? like fuck.” she sneered back at you in clear irritation.
you looked behind you again and yelled at your girlfriend, “dude why are you being sooo fuckinggg negativeee?” you slurred your sentence out before carefully grabbing a shot glass and tipping it back, repeating the action three times more before you tapped out.
“jesus girl, you know how to put ‘em down!” aubrey laughed, patting your back as you absentmindedly smiled in delight.
the other girls that surrounded you and paige, looked a little shocked. you couldn’t piece together why but it was just then that you realized your girlfriend had walked away from the table. you had no energy to try and find your girlfriend so you shrugged it off and everybody resumed their conversations, including you and paige’s.
“i gotta go to the bathroom, p. come with?” you smiled at the taller girl who nodded and took your hand.
as you opened the door to see the quite fancy bathroom you lead her into the biggest stall.
“i fuckin’- fuckin’ hate youu paige” you slightly sniffled, the cold compress of your back to the metal stall-wall was enough to sober you up in the slightest.
“i know you do, shh, it’s okay.” she soothed as she cupped your face in your larger hands and leaned down to connect your lips. you kissed back and the guilt in your stomach bubbled up to your throat. you ignored it, feeling to good in the moment to stop.
“paige- stop. i have,” you sighed out, completely out of breath, “-a girlfriend, i can’t- we can’t do this. i can’t cheat on her.”
“it ain’t cheating if she don’t see.”
instead of rebutting you kissed her again, her hands snaked onto your waist and her hand slowly inched its way to unzip your jeans.
“more paige, please,”
“i know baby, i know.”
her seemingly magical hand always did it for you, the orgasms she gave you just with her hand were beyond amazing. it was something your girlfriend couldn’t do. she was too small, too inexperienced, which wouldn’t have bothered you if it was paige, but it wasn’t. it was kate. and kate wasn’t enough.
you shook off your jeans off your waist and dropped to her knees. she licked a big stripe as she flattened her tongue against your already soaking pussy. your hands flew to her head, “does kate fuck you with her tongue?” paige sneered from under you, all you could do was moan out in response, “does she?”
“no! fuck- no, paige. nobody does it like you!”
just as she pulled your underwear down and sloppily kissed your clit, there was a knock at the stall door. you were so glad there wasn’t a gap between the door and the floor because whoever it was would’ve seen the horrific events that happened on the other side.
you immediately sobered up as you heard her voice, kate’s voice. “hello? paige?” she called out, “uh, yeah?” paige replied, still on her knees, about to dive into you again if you didn’t push her head away in retaliation.
“aubrey said she saw you come in here, i’m guessing you know where y/n is. i- i feel bad for running off.”
“fuck.” you whispered, only for yourself to hear. tears welled up in your eyes as you re adjusted your jeans and top, the guilt you swallowed down earlier pleading and threatening to come back up. the mix of culpability and alcohol was a blend you didn’t recommend.
“i think she took a walk. i didn’t see her, sorry.”
“oh- okay. sorry.” she sighed and walked out
paige bit her lip and stared you in your eyes, you were beyond upset and her out the way, rushing out the stall.
“wait- y/n- stop!” paige called out your name, trying to grab your arm. you shook her grip off, not looking back once.
you made sure to look both ways before leaving the washroom as you didn’t want to run into kate.
walking back to the table in a hurry, you asked, “have you guys seen kate? i need to talk to her.”
“she might’ve went outside, she was just looking for you,” kk looked at you suspiciously as she explained.
“i’ll explain later.” you mouthed to her, rushing off to find kate. it fortunately, didn’t take long as she sat by the car in the dark parking lot. “hey, there you are.” you tried to empathize with her as best as you could, “hey.”
“where’d you go? i’m- i’m sorry for not coming to find you.”
“y/n, be honest. if i never comforted you about paige, would you even have been interested in me other then just venting about the relationship to me?”
“i- of course i would. why would you doubt me, katie?”
“don’t- don’t call me that. and how couldn’t i doubt you? i avoid going out with the team for this reason specifically. you always gravitate towards paige. always have. even when you ‘hated her’.” she quoted the multiple times when you would say you hated paige but would do anything to be in her proximity when you would be out. you knew she was right.
“i’m sorry kate. i really am.”
“your apologies are getting too repetitive for them to mean anything. do me a favour, after i drive you home, i’m going to leave. i don’t want you to call or text, just let me breathe. i’ll be back when im back, okay?”
“kate- no, don’t- don’t do this. we can sort it-“ before you could finish she shook her head, her lips pursed into a line and cooked her keys to unlock the car.
she signalled you to get into the car and you complied. the rest of the drive was complete awkward silence. once you arrived at your apartment, she walked you into your room and faked a smile before leaving and locking the door, “take care of yourself tonight, y/n.” you frowned at her words and the dimly lit apartment fed your pool of sadness that flooded from your eyes.
you couldn’t just blame paige. yes she was enticing you practically the whole night but you didn’t have to give in. you didn’t have to make that snarky comment towards your girlfriend. you didn’t have to admit your sex life wasn’t as good with kate as it was paige. you could, however, blame it on paige for the years that she made you believe that it was normal to live like this. normal to ignore eachother for months on end just to have sex and talk for a fraction of the time you would end up cutting contact with her.
paige wasn’t what mattered right now, it was kate. you might have just ruined your healthiest relationship yet with a girl that cheated, lied, and was altogether toxic.
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