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#I had an interesting discussion a couple of years ago
avamills · 2 years
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lmao kinda funny story about how i’m connected to someone on cobra kai in the tags lol. tw r@cism tho
#something that plagues my mind constantly is how a couple years ago i was kind of seeing this guy#who i didn’t really like like that he was alright y’know but i wasn’t attracted to him#so we were in this situationship i guess and he didn’t know i was biracial bc of my last name right even though i felt like it came up more#than once like me saying real mexican food is actually like etc etc and stuff like that#but anyway so he finds out via my friend who is the one who introduced us#when he was saying things about immigration and stuff okay keep in mind this was a couple years ago when that was THE biggest discussion#and my friend who i love dearly was like interesting you’re saying this when the girl you’ve been relentlessly persuing the last few months#is mexican and second gen#and he was APPALLED because he apparently didn’t know#and so she tells me about this and i’m like oh that sucks but i don’t know how to like confront people so i was just weird every time i saw#him and finally he was hanging out with just our mutual friend and by this time he had stopped his insane advances pretty abruptly#and i had assumed it was because my reaction to finding out what he said made me explicitly turn him down rather than play into it#because okay i’ll admit i’ll play into it with men because i like to see what they think of me y’know lol#but it turns out he stopped because he found out i’m mexican when actually i’m half mexican but anyway#so they were hanging out and he says it sucks about your friend being an illegal because she was cute AND smart#like yeah she introduced us bc at the time we were both history majors#and she tells me this and i was like WHAT#like first of all what a racist pos and second of all he KNOWS i’m second gen we both told him that now why would you call me ~an illegal~#i’ve never even been out of the country!! i’ve only even left my state once!!!!#it was weird and we both cut him off after that and he went back to georgia and the reason i’m telling this story is because he was an extra#on our little karate show my friend showed me the post he posted about being on the show as an extra and i haven’t seen him but apparently#he’s there at least on the first season lol#he’s always been an extra on things like that’s his job lol he was in far far from home also#or whatever the first tom holland spider-man movie was i don’t remember but he was on that one#idk funny story i just remembered because someone told me if you’re light skinned that just means you’re white#which i can not even BEGIN to explain how wrong that is
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disneyprincemuke · 2 months
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the overachiever * fem!driver
she's just a little competitive, that's all
pairings: logan sargeant x fem!driver, sebastian vettel x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, liam lawson x fem!driver
notes: YAUUUR i'm back with em femdriver updates dawg
(series masterlist) | (📂 the rookie season)
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oscar leans to the side as he avoids the ball hurled at him at seemingly an alarming rate — could have possibly taken his head off if he hadn’t moved fast enough — then turns back to the pair on the other side of the court. “oi!”
“loser!” she pumps her fist in the air and hops over to her teammate on her side of the court, hand lifted for a high-5. “do better.”
oscar rests a hand on his hip, chest heaving as he whirls around to where the ball had bounced to. “this was supposed to be a chill game. what is your problem?”
liam laughs, clutching his stomach as he threw his head back. he catches the girl’s hand and nods. “sore losers, aren’t they?”
“isn’t this your first time playing padel?” logan scowls. “how are you already so good at it?”
she shrugs as she puts her racket between her legs, readjusting her ponytail. “you know i can’t stand when i’m bad at things. of course, i prepared myself for today.”
when oscar had invited them out for a game of padel, he had expected it to be a first out of many short games. what nobody had expected, though, is for the girl — who claimed to know nothing of the sport just a week ago — to be absolutely dominating them on the court.
there is a reason they hadn’t invited the rest of their friends or anyone else from the grid. they just wanted to slowly take their time to learn the ropes of the game so that when the season goes underway, they don’t embarrass themselves when they get invited to games by other drivers.
but of course, the overachiever did her research and is already excelling to a certain extent. it’s just something they’d had to endure over the years: her in-explainable need to be good at everything immediately. if she’s not good at it from the get-go, she loses interest quickly.
“how? how could you have possibly prepared yourself for a game of padel? you didn’t even have a racket until 3 days ago,” logan scolds, throwing his arms in the air as the frustration slowly gets to him. there’s just something about her beating him in absolutely everything that’s sort of absurd. “i was literally with you when we went to get your stupid racket!”
“there’s this thing called youtube?” she hums with an eyebrow raised with the roll of her eyes. “and i asked fernando for some tips. so i’m kind of… like… a pro.”
“doesn’t make you a pro,” oscar scowls with a frown as he shakes his head. “makes you a bit of a nerd, though.”
“well i am graduating with a degree in information technology in a couple of months. so, perhaps, i could be a nerd,” she hums, with a giddy grin, “at least if the whole racing thing doesn’t work out… i have a way out. unlike you dropouts!”
“a woman in stem!” liam cheers. “if you graduate first class, i’ll buy you a car. what’s your current grades?”
she presses her lips together, nodding as she tries to formulate a plan for her education. “if i study harder for my final exam in a week, i could make that happen. i’m a pretty solid b grade student.”
“i meant a toy car, you freak,” liam frowns, scowling at her. “you think i’m getting paid loads as a reserve driver?”
“i overheard the team discussing you the other afternoon. who knows? we very well may be teammates next year.”
“i sure hope not,” logan butts in with a snort. “that wouldn’t do anyone any good — two idiots in the same team.”
she tilts her head, blinking innocently at him. “what do you mean? williams seems to be doing great with that kind of lineup this year.”
logan clenches his jaw, puckering his lips as he looks at her. “okay.”
“enough fighting,” oscar rolls his eyes. “ready to lose again, logan?”
the american sighs. “yeah, i guess.”
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“god, don’t you know what a demonstration means?” max clutches his stomach, hunching over as the pain shoots through his torso. he watches the ball slowly bounce on the ground, right after hitting him in the stomach.
beside her, penelope giggles as she approaches max in concern. “are you okay, maxie?”
max shakes his head, glancing at the young child before dropping to his knees as he groans. “no, p. she bullied me!”
“she’s so strong!” penelope cheers, hopping over to the older girl with a screechy giggle. “but you should say sorry, maybe!”
“you’re right,” she grins, patting penelope on the head. “i’m sorry, max.” she leans down to max’s ear out of penelope’s hearing range. “that you got outplayed by a girl.”
max lifts his head to glare at her. they were just teaching penelope how to play football, the older girl describing earlier how to score effectively after she expressed interest in the sport. when she was asked to demonstrate the move, max didn’t expect her to kick the ball so hard.
“i knew that was coming. you’re so harsh!”
he was expecting a semi-strong kick to his stomach — something that he could catch and bear before they continued their small game of football. but no, she kicked the ball as hard as she could and almost incapacitated him.
though, perhaps incapacitated is too strong of a word. but he still does feel it in his gut, stumbling back in confusion when the ball came into contact with him.
can he really blame her, though? he sort of gets it: the need to be good at everything to please people. maybe it’s the eldest sibling trait.
“i was in varsity when i was in primary school,” she presses her lips together with a small smile. she holds her arms out to the younger girl and gestures towards her parent’s house. “i could get blythe to make us orange juice, p. do you want some?”
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she sighs and drops her hands. “you can do better than that.”
logan drops his stance, his hands resting by the side of his body. “what do you mean? i don’t want to hit you so hard.”
“why? it’s not our first time sparring,” she scowls, wiping the side of her face on the sleeve of her shirt. she lifts her hands again, inside a pair of boxing gloves, and protects her face. “come on. hit me like you mean it.”
“i’m not going to hit you,” logan mutters. “we’re just warming up until benny and noah get here, right? that’s what you said.”
“yeah, but,” she darts a hand out, barely missing logan’s face when he leans back to avoid her punch, “i want a real challenge before they get here. come on, logan.”
but logan doesn’t fight back. instead, he takes several steps back when she tries to approach him, both arms darting out in an attempt to rile him up into a real spar.
“stop trying. i’m not doing this with you,” logan sighs, touching gloves with her everytime she tries to reach forward for him. “i know you were in martial arts growing up too, but i wasn’t. i’m just here because you asked me to be here.”
she grins. “exactly. so, fight back. don’t be a coward.”
“you’re not going to rile me up into a fight. i’m not you.”
“it works sometimes.” she dips down slightly and throws a punch into his stomach, prompting a huff as it hits him. “hit me back.”
“no way. stop asking me to do that.”
“coward.”
“okay.”
she touches his thigh with her feet, the taller boy stumbling slightly. “you’re just gonna let me do that to you? do something.”
“you’re not gonna get anything out of him.” a familiar voice makes both of you turn your head towards the door, benny walking in with a small smile and a gym bag over his shoulder. “very patient, this guy.”
“you clearly did not live in the same house as him for years,” she laughs, running over with her arms opens to get a hug. “will you spar with me until noah gets here? logan is so boring — he never hits me back.”
“hey!”
“sure! but you can’t cry when you lose.”
“maybe.”
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sebastian tilts his head and furrows his eyebrows. “are you sure go-karting is what you wanna do over summer break? don’t you have other things to do?”
“we’ve done everything she wants to do,” oscar says begrudgingly as he puts his helmet on. “she cried this morning saying she misses racing.”
logan also looks tiredly at sebastian, shaking his head as he takes his helmet out of his bag. “i woke up to her sleeping on the couch hugging her helmet, by the way.”
the girl scoffs, punching logan’s arm as he unveils a secret he was sworn to never say to anybody else just this afternoon. “no, i was not!”
“ah, don’t be so shy about it,” sebastian smiles. “i also felt like that in my rookie year. all i could think of was being out on the track.”
“i guess i could study for my exams.” she exchanges glances with the 3 men around her before shrugging. “oh, well. time to race and beat your asses.”
“oh? you think you could be a 4-time world champion?” sebastian raises his eyebrows. “i’d like to see you try.”
“you clearly haven’t met me,” she hums, stopping in her track to turn around and face sebastian. she holds a hand out between them. “hi, i’m the most competitive girl you’ll ever meet. and i will beat you at go-karting today.”
while that doesn’t actually happen that evening, sebastian laughed as he climbed out of his go-kart at the end of their 10-minute race. she swears to him that someday she will be good enough to beat him in equal machinery (a go-kart).
which oscar begs to argue that she’s simply overdramatising the situation. but she just knows it’ll happen eventually.
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Y'all regularly send in questions wanting to know how to report concerns you've observed at zoos you've visited. I've been able to point people at the USDA (regulatory) option, but with regard to accrediting groups I haven't had a good answer. I spent the last six months or so really digging into why there hasn't been a good answer. What I've found is that the majority of zoological accrediting groups in the United States don't provide any way for the public to report issues they've observed at accredited facilities, and none of said organizations have a mechanism for truly supporting / protecting staff who might choose to report issues at their own facilities. Which is. not great.
I wrote a whole Substack post about it a few days ago, arguing that in order to remain credible institutions accrediting groups must facilitate public reporting, anonymous reporting, and commit to enforcing penalties for any retaliation against staff who choose to utilize the option. I'm linking it below for anyone who is interested in all the details. CW at the beginning for animal abuse mentions - I started the piece by discussing a truly egregious welfare situation that occurred last year at a Miami facility, which might have been prevented or at least caught earlier if the two groups that accredit the facility had had a reporting mechanism in place.
What I want to talk about here, though, is specifically why accrediting orgs need to not only have an anonymous reporting option for staff, but why they must ban retaliation and penalize any facility that does it anyway. Whenever something terrible happens at a zoo or sanctuary, people always ask "why didn't the staff say something?" And the answer is, basically, because taking that risk can get you not just fired, but blacklisted from the field. People literally end up having to choose between their careers and making noise about issues that aren't being resolved, and that's absolutely not freaking okay. But I want to explain for you the extent of the issue.
If you're not industry, something you might be surprised to learn is that most zoo staff don't have any special reporting options above and beyond what the public does. Most zookeepers and other low-level staff never interact with people from accrediting groups except during an actual inspection - so if there's a problem, it's not like they know someone they can back-channel a concern to if they don't feel safe reporting it publicly. And for the most part, reporting things your facility is doing to an accrediting group will always be considered inappropriate and probably get a keeper in trouble (even if it's a really valid issue).
The zoological industry runs on a strongly hierarchical system. Staff are expected to “stay within their lanes” and work within the established bureaucracy to resolve issues. Deviating from this, if staff feel like management are suppressing issues or something needs to be addressed urgently, is very heavily frowned upon. Basically, going around management to bring something to an accrediting group (or USDA, or the media) is seen as indicating that your facility has failed to address a problem, or that the individual making the report feels they know more than their superiors. At most places, no matter how extreme an issue may become, there's never a point at which it would be acceptable for a staff member to reveal a facility’s internal issues to their accrediting body. 
The thing is, attempting to resolve issues through the proper internal channels at a facility doesn't always work! It can result in an issue being covered up (especially if the company is kinda shady) or suppressed rather than addressed. If staff decide to push the issue, it can really backfire and jeopardize their job, because it's expected that if management says something is fine, staff need to acquiesce and go along with it.
There have been a couple high-profile examples of this in the last decade: the incident I mention in my Substack where new management at the Miami Seaquarium decided to starve dolphins to coerce them into participating in guest programs, and an issue at the Austin Zoo five-ish years ago where the director was perpetuating serious welfare issues and ignoring staff feedback. In both cases, there's always the questions of where the accrediting group was. We don't know anything about what happened with the Seaquarium (it's been over six months since the USDA report documenting the diet cuts was released and AMMPA and American Humane haven't said a thing), but I remember hearing that ZAA had no idea what was happening at Austin because nobody had reached out to them about it.
This is why I'm arguing that all zoological accrediting groups need to make visible reporting options and make sure staff feel safe enough to use them! If you've got a facility perpetuating or not dealing with major issues, it's pretty probable that they're going to be unhappy if their staff reports those issues to any oversight body. That's not a situation where it's currently safe to speak up right now - and four out of five zoological accrediting groups in the US don't have standards prohibiting retaliation against staff for bringing up issues like that! (Surprisingly, it's not AZA. It's the sanctuary accrediting group, GFAS). Without any option for internal reporting, issues may not get addressed - which hurts animal welfare - or people risk losing their job, possibly their entire career in the field (which is a huge part of people's identities!), and their financial stability to advocate for their animals.
Currently, the two accrediting groups that do have reporting options (AZA and GFAS) stay they'll attempt to keep reports anonymous, but acknowledge it may not be possible to do so. (Which tracks, because zoo jobs are highly specialized and only a few people may be exposed to an issue). However, only GFAS prohibits facilities from retaliating against people who make reports. On top of that, there's absolutely no transparency about what happens next: GFAS, ZAA, AMMPA and AH have no information about how the process transpires and if someone making a report will get any information back about what happened. AZA straight up says that all accreditation stuff is proprietary (read: confidential) so you just have to trust that they dealt with it appropriately. Just yeet your report into the void and hope the groups doing oversight handle it correctly when there's no accountability? That's... not a great look for animal welfare concerns.
I hope the industry chooses to fix this problem. I hope it chooses to invest in transparency and increased credibility. I don't know what I expect, but I'd like to see these accrediting groups do the right thing.
My full write-up on how accrediting groups in the US handle reporting and concerns (or don't) is linked below.
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pandoraslxna · 10 months
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Sweet like Cherry – Chapter 2
Miles Quaritch x female human reader
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Words: 6.5k
Summary: Miles has a secret admirer and apparently, she has a thing for photography.
Warnings: explicit smut, voyeurism, exhibitionism, bullying, teasing, sexual tension, virginity, fingering, masturbation, dirty talk, dom/sub dynamics, nudes, corruption kink, slight praise and degradation / humiliation, daddy issues, age difference, authority kink, alcohol consumption, edging
Notes: I wrote this during the worst writers block ever, so I feel like there’s still so much left unsaid in this chapter, ugh. Whatever. I still hope you guys enjoy it! Also, please don’t get confused but I’ve decided to switch the pov between Miles and Cherry every other chapter so the story can be seen through the eyes of both of them.
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The first time you could remember being called a nerd it had been as an insult. Of course.
The term exactly used was ‘stupid nerd’ after you had refused to give the answers to a biology test to the rest of the class in highschool. You could handle being called names, it wasn't that much of a big deal. In fact, you were a nerd. There was no way around it. No matter how many times you insisted you had been to any party’s on the weekends instead of studying all night long or that you had made out with that definitely-not-imaginary-boyfriend after school, you were and you would always be a massive nerd.
Nothing to be ashamed of, honestly. It’s what had gotten you this job, after all.
Driven to succeed starting from a young age, you had excelled academically, earning top grades and winning numerous awards. You‘ve always been particularly interested in science and botanic, and even pursued a degree at a prestigious university.
After graduation, you set your sights on this rare opportunity to work at a highly coveted research lab, one that only a handful of people in the world had ever been invited to join. Over the years, you worked tirelessly, taking on increasingly complex projects and earning the respect of colleagues and superiors.
Spending long hours studying, researching and practicing your skills was the reason why you ended up being one of the candidates that were considered for this job. And when the time came to apply, you submitted a flawless application that showcased your brilliance and dedication.
Yes, you were a nerd. But in the end, you had beat out hundreds of other highly qualified applicants for the chance to be send to Pandora, working for the RDA‘s botanical scientific team.
So, it wasn't like you didn't like the word. The only issue was, that it brought back some unpleasant memories you thought that a twenty-five year old adult should have already been over.
But the first time someone on Pandora had called you a nerd, you didn't come back to that memory. No, your mind was entirely too focused on taking in the sight and presence in front of you to even have time to go back to that place, back to the time in school when people thought intelligence was a reason to bully.
The main cafeteria was as cramped as usual, soldiers as well as scientists taking in their meals in the spacious hall. It was well-lit and ventilated, with long tables and benches filling the room that almost reminded you of the cafeteria at your old university back on earth.
The food options are diverse, thankfully. Ranging from traditional earth cuisine to exotic dishes from Pandora. The atmosphere was bustling, with conversations and debates taking place between colleagues, while others sat in silence, lost in thought. Despite their differences, everyone seemed to be united in their shared mission on Pandora, which was something you realized right after your arrival on this planet a couple of months ago. It made you feel like you finally belonged somewhere.
Poking around in what looked like pasta, but was actually some green-yellowish-vegetable, you absently listened to your coworkers wild discussion about a topic that seemed pretty much endless to you.
Maggie‘s latest success of exchanging phone numbers with Phil from floor 3.G. A computer engineer and now basically the talk of the town. The town being you and a couple of female coworkers your age that often shared lunch together, but otherwise barely interacted if it wasn’t work related.
Apparently, it was a rather big deal for Maggie to finally get into Phil’s pants, because, and I quote, "it’s been forever" and "I almost feel like I will revert into a virgin back again if I don’t get laid anytime soon" followed by cheerful laughter and agreement of the whole group.
It was weird, you thought, how people act as though not getting laid is the worst thing that could possibly happen to a person. You, honest to god, could not care less whether or not you will have sex in the next century, much less the next couple of years.
Deciding that you’ve heard enough nonsense for the day, you packed up your lunch and excused yourself with a polite smile.
Lost in thought, your feet tapped on the floor as you waited for the elevator doors to open, so you could travel up to the main lab and continue your work in peace.
Sure, the other scientists were nice and under other circumstances you would maybe even consider them as more than just coworkers, you think to yourself. But you weren’t here to make friends.
The doors then slide open with a ding, cutting off your train of thoughts before your eyes fall on the wall of blue muscles and green cargo pants that were about to exit the elevator, stopping yourself just in time before you ran into them.
These must be the recombinant soldiers all of bridgehead city was talking about lately, you thought. They looked like Na‘vi, almost identical like the ones you’ve studied in books and seen on photos, when the head of security advised you and the others on your very first day on Pandora. You knew Na‘vi were inhumanly tall, but these guys were god damn trees! You had to crane your neck all the way up to even look at their faces.
Your eyes fell on the soldier standing more in the front than the others, spine straight and chest puffed out like a leader. His skins was a midnight blue, with faint, bioluminescence dots all over his body, barely visible in the bright daylight. His eyes immediately landed on you as well, bright like stars and boring through your very soul, like you were an insect that landed on his windshield.
You were so lost in your admiration of the foreign view in front of you, that your feet decided to grow roots underneath your soles, instead of showing proper etiquette and stepping aside.
"Move it, nerd", the recom suddenly said, his voice low and thick and more like a deep, annoyed grumble than anything else. The soldiers behind him begin to chuckle as you quickly scrambled to the side so they could finally pass. Even though he was quite tall, he seemed to move lithe and with grace. Silent, even with heavy combat boots and packed full of military gear. His tail gently swaying behind his back and ears laying flat against his head, he reminded you of a cat.
A big, blue cat.
"At least these damn science pukes never change", you heard the same blue soldier say to his companions before the elevator doors closed right in front of your face, leaving you alone with the reflection of your dumbstruck expression in the silvery reflection.
Colonel Miles Quaritch was the one you’ve crossed paths with on this day. The one who’d called you a nerd, followed by the extremely creative term 'science puke'. Of course you had heard about him, heard his stories, told by soldiers and scientists like he was some kind of myth or legend. And maybe he was.
Until this day, you still don’t know what exactly it was, that made him so incredibly fascinating to you. At first you thought, that maybe you were just mesmerized by the first Na‘vi-like humanoid you had seen in person. They were pretty, no doubt. Exotic. But then again, you weren’t really interested in any of the other recoms.
It was just him.
Cold logic told you that the most sensible thing to do right now was forget about him.
Miles Quaritch was a man of authority. He wasn’t just a guy, like Phil from floor 3.G was just a guy. Not just any man on this moon, not just any man in his mid twenties that you should consider more appropriate and fitting for a woman like you.
So maybe it was the fact that he was older. Old enough that if you would dare to say it out loud, the thought that you think of him as attractive, people would throw concerning looks at you and maybe even scrunch their noses in disgust. Old enough, it would send your mother into a coma.
There had to be some rule against woman finding men around their fathers age hot. Men whose authority made them ten times more attractive. Men that were exotic and alien and blue and tall and— There had to be some law that– that could protect you from the dangerous man that Quaritch was. There had to be something in the books about dealing with this.
This being the pounding in your chest whenever you thought about the Miles Quaritch being the one to pop your cherry. A thought that had never crossed your mind before, not in all of your twenty five years of living, and not with any other man you’ve met before.
Since that day, you kept seeing him and his squad almost daily. Usually, it was just the two of you walking past each other in the hallway, him entering the cafeteria just as you left or watching him get on a samson helicopter from the giant floor-to-ceiling window of the upper laboratory. He definitely was a busy man, never lowering his gaze enough to acknowledge you or literally any other human.
You might laugh if you weren’t feeling so…conflicted, right now. Honestly, how the fuck are you supposed to keep going about your business as usual after this? Making you feel the way he does and then having the nerve, the audacity, to pretend like he hadn’t just thrown your whole world for a loop?
And that’s the painful realization that finally hit you on this tuesday night, after a hot bath with a side of one or two glasses of wine. Okay, maybe three.
To him, you were just one of the many unimportant nerds on this stupid moon, blending into the background like you were part of the interior design.
The third— no, actually it was the fourth glass of wine that you emptied with a final, big gulp. It had a sharp flavor that made you grimace when you were still at your first glass and burned your nasal passages in a similar way to horseradish. But now it was bearable. It’s not like you had any other choice than to drink this overly expensive pandorian wine, made from grapes that were sown and reaped on the soil that was soon to be the new home of mankind. Definitely not worth the price of thirty bucks for a bottle, though.
Turning around in your bed, you sat the glass down on your nightstand. Glancing around, your eyes fell upon the polaroid camera, your camera, perched on the chair by the small wooden desk. Memories come flooding back as you looked at it, reminding you of home and the countless moments captured by the instant camera.
You could almost hear the sound of the shutter and the whirring of the film as it developed. A sense of nostalgia washes over you as you remember the familiar faces and places immortalized by it. For a brief moment, you feel as though you had transported back to your childhood home, surrounded by the warmth and comfort of your family. It was a gift, the old thing. Meant to capture photos of the new world, friends and moments with a loved one. Someone your family, and maybe deep down even yourself, were hoping you would finally find here.
With a sigh, you shook your head as if that would shake off those thoughts. But the harm’s already been done and your interest has already been piqued.
The only guy in this city, on this damn moon, that you were maybe just a teeny-tiny bit interested in, would most definitely never notice that you even exist. You were certain that even if he magically decided to do so, he wouldn’t even find you attractive, let alone interesting enough that you would truly capture his attention for more than two minutes. Your confidence was further undermined by your tendency to overthink and second-guess yourself, making you feel even more inadequate.
If only there was a way for him to acknowledge your existence, to know that there was someone who’s interested in him, without the further embarrassment and humiliation of him knowing who exactly you are and having to stand in front of this giant blue man, and possibly his whole squad too, and confess whatever feelings you harbored for him. Feelings you couldn’t really put a name on just yet.
May it be through the fifth glass of wine and the fact that drinking always lead you to things that never turned out good -the main reason why you thought you had quit drinking at all- or call it faith, but somehow your gaze lands on the little polaroid camera once again. God, it must’ve really been the fucking alcohol screwing with your brain, because there was no way you, of all people, was actually thinking about this.
A man like Colonel Miles Quaritch must’ve been hard to impress. He wasn’t a man of many words, so anonymous love letters wouldn’t do. But he was still a man after all, and if there was one thing you’ve learned in these past couple of weeks (thank you, Maggie), then it was the fact that men were obsessed with the female body and seeing them pop up on their screens at 3am.
But that would require you getting your hands on either his phone number, which you doubted even exists, or his work email, that was probably supervised by someone. A man like Quaritch that was so important to the whole of Bridgehead city really wasn’t an easy target when it came to anonymous messages, let alone nudes that were meant for his eyes only. Which left you with one choice only.
It had to be the old fashioned way.
Being reckless surely didn’t get you into this career path. Actually, it was the complete opposite.
Usually, you were rather cautious and thoughtful in your actions and decisions. You take the time to weigh the risks and benefits of a situation before making a choice, prioritize safety and responsibility over immediate gratification.
Planning ahead and taking steps to mitigate potential risks, rather than rushing headlong into a situation without considering the consequences was more like you.
While you may have not always been the most spontaneous or adventurous type of person, your friends- okay scratch that, your coworkers respected you for your level-headedness and reliability, your sense of conscientiousness and a desire to act in a responsible and considered way.
You didn’t spend half your life being teased as prudent, too careful and deliberate, just to now act like a brainless, horny teenager. Yet here you where, at exactly four-thirty in the morning, sliding a set of carefully chosen polaroids under the gap of Quaritch‘s door.
By now, you knew his daily routines, knew his busy schedule by heart. When he was gone to workout with the rest his squad, knew when he was at the cafeteria and when he was away for a mission. Still, you couldn’t help but glance both ways, making sure the hallway was empty, before you slid them under his door and made a run for it like a school girl placing chocolate on her crush’s desk on Valentine’s Day.
You blamed it on the adrenaline pumping through your veins that day, and also the days after that, but you found yourself laying in bed with a hand buried between your thighs quite more often than usual. Not that you would actually call yourself a voyeur, but there was just something about knowing Quaritch had now officially seen you naked that did something to you.
Miles Quaritch didn't– wouldn't ever touch you, you knew that, was well aware of that even if it pained you. But then again, nobody ever said you couldn't take a deep, shaky breath, slip a hand beneath the waistband of your pyjama pants, and shut your eyes as you touched yourself, imagining it was him touching you, instead. There was no harm in that, really. And you even came to the conclusion that you would be perfectly fine to continue living like that.
In those rare moments you’ve been seeing him during lunch break or the split seconds of passing each other in the hallway, you didn’t note a significant change in his mannerisms. Not towards you or literally anyone else. However, the tension in his shoulders seemed to have loosened up the past couple of days. Not by much, but enough for someone like you to notice. Which could mean two things. One, he still hadn’t figured out that the woman on these anonymous, but very explicit, polaroid photos was you. And two, he didn’t mind receiving them.
This theory was surprisingly proven right just a couple of weeks later.
Unfortunately, in this moment, you weren't as excited about those news as you thought you would be. If anything, you felt like a child getting caught with a hand stuck in the cookie jar, while balancing on a chair that only stood on one leg to reach the top of the fridge.
"Well, well. Look what we have here. If that ain’t my sweet little cherry…"
With trembling fingers, you entered the pass code to your room, the door unlocking with a familiar click to reveal a dimly lit bedroom.
You absently cursed yourself for not making the bed before you had left, too busy rushing out and get to the Colonels room for your daily delivery, hoping he wasn’t back from his mission yet. Luck definitely wasn’t on your side today.
After a long moment of standing motionless in the doorway, you suddenly felt a large palm on your lower back, gentle, yet firmly pushing you further into the room. Your shoulders begin to tense up at the thought of who was standing right behind you, crouching to even fit through the door.
The floor under his heavy combat boots creaked as the Colonel followed you, otherwise silent as a cat. You dared to glance over your shoulder just once, looking back to find him scanning your room like he was entering dangerous territory. His golden eyes almost seemed to glow in the dark, and it send goosebumps prickling over your skin when they landed on you.
Your room wasn’t particularly big, so it only took three or four steps for you to reach the center of it, coming to an halt right in front of your bed before you slowly turned around to face him. You clenched and unclenched your hands into fists at your sides, feeling your fingernails dig into sweaty palms.
Your heart was still racing as Quaritch eyed you up and down. With a sinking feeling in your chest, you mentally prepared yourself for the consequences that awaited you, expecting that you would inevitably face a scolding for your actions.
Your lips parted to speak, yet his voice was quicker to slice through the thick tension in the air.
"Show me", was all he said, arms crossing over his board chest, like a teacher expecting to hear a step by step explanation on how you came up with the answer to a question that was way out of your brand of knowledge.
"W-What?"
The Colonel tsks, but he doesn’t sound all too angry. If anything, he sounds amused. Like this was a game to him, and it made you feel so much smaller next to him than you already were. "How you do it", he chuckled lowly, "Show me how you took these photos, cherry."
His words left you speechless. You could physically feel how your cheeks flushed with embarrassment, and words failed to find their way past the knot in your throat. In all honesty, you expected thing to take a different turn here.
The prompting raise of his eyebrows was all that it took for you to plop down onto the edge of your bed.
There was this strange, pulsing sensation in your underwear, hot and insistent— almost an ache, as you stared up at Quaritch with wide eyes.
"Where do you usually put the camera?", he asks ever so nonchalantly, looking around briefly before his eyes bore into yours again and you force yourself to swallow around the lump in your throat.
"There", you point to a chair next to the table in front of your bed. "It has an automatic shutter. Goes off every couple of minutes so I don’t… h-have to get up every time."
The Colonel nods attentively, and then he moves to where you point, one long stride before he sits down right there on the chair. It’s comically small underneath him, his thick thighs spread wide as he leans back and the seat creaks underneath his weight.
"Go on", he urges, his hand gesturing in the air before it comes to rest at this thigh. "Take off your clothes."
A minute passes, and this is too strange for you to be comfortable with. He couldn’t except you to strip down right here, right in front of him. Not with him just sitting there, watching.
You glanced down at yourself with a frown, subconsciously biting your bottom lip in thought.
You never used to think much about how you looked to others. It’s not that you didn’t care about your own body. You cared about hygiene, about a well-groomed appearance. But you had little to no concept of your own attractiveness.
Seeing that you hadn’t moved to obey his command, the Colonel shook his head with another tsk.
"C‘mere", he then said with a sigh, reaching out with his free hand and then grabbed your wrist as soon as you got up from your position, jerking you closer. You swallowed nervously, stumbling and lifting your other hand, bracing yourself against his chest. You blushed the moment you realized the sudden closeness and dropped your hand, trying to step away, but a firm hand on the backside of your thigh wouldn't let you.
"Humor me, cherry", he said, his hands running up and down your thighs, big enough to almost close entirely around them. "I didn’t recall you as being so shy when I’ve got all these photos from you. That was you, right?"
His hands moved up higher, his palms gliding over the soft swell of your ass, reaching for the zipper of your pencil skirt. All hair on your body stood up straight at the sound of your zipper being pulled down.
"Yes, sir", you breathed softly. The Colonel hooks his thumbs underneath the waistband of your skirt, slowly pulling the black fabric down and over your legs. He hums softly as his eyes catch sight of your lace panties, his thumb gently running over the fabric. For a second, your breath hitches and you think he would pull them down next, but then his hands move further up, apparently saving this part for the grand finale. Although they’re big and you expect his fingers to work rather clumsily with the extremely small buttons of your blouse, he opens them swiftly and with dexterity.
The slide down of your sleeves over your shoulders and arms is slow, almost sensually. You shiver once the cold air of the room hits your bare skin. You don’t even know when and how he had opened the clasp of your bra, and it’s only when he makes you lift your arms a little to get it off, that you realize you’re almost completely bare before him now.
The urge to cover your chest overcomes you suddenly, but his hands move faster, snatching your wrists to keep them at your sides. With a warning squeeze, he lets go of them then, in order to let them roam over your body, to admire what was hidden from his sight. Unblemished skin, perky nipples, the rapid rise and fall of your chest synced to your breathing, each one precious, finite. Quaritch’s hand is warm when it runs up your stomach to cup a breast, giving an experimental squeeze that makes you bite down on the inside of your cheek, hard, to stifle a whimper. You should feel shame, you think, as you arch against the warmth of his palm. His thumb brushes over a nipple and your breathing stutters, a mischievous grin spreading over his lips at that.
"This your first time, ain’t it?"
You swallow hard at the question, heart skittering in your chest, as you try to decide whether to put your focus on the feeling of his hand sliding down your waist or figuring out the answer to his questions.
With his other hand, the Colonel traces the outline of your tattoo, his gaze so intense and focused on the fine, red lines, that your breathing soon turns into shallow pants of air. You felt hot. Too hot, as you slowly become aware of the situation you were in.
His hand slides further down your side, along your hips, down to the backside of your thighs, squeezing the soft flesh. This time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper from escaping. Immediately, your hand comes up to cover your mouth. Quaritch smiles at that, wickedly amused. "You're not very good at hiding it. So twitchy and scared. Bit off a bit more than you could chew, hm?"
There came no response from you, besides the shakily exhale of a breath you didn’t realize you were even holding and the red flush of your face.
Quaritch chuckles softly and you feel your heart pounding in your chest, feel it pulsating between your legs.
"Are you into that kind of stuff? Did it get you wet?", he asks with the tilt of his head, "Got all hot and bothered giving me these polaroids?"
The sight of his half lidded eyes staring at you sends a thrill crackling down your spine, wild and breathless. Heat pools in your stomach in a way that you’ve never let yourself get so close to before, the very height of arousal. So different from all the times you had touched yourself.
"Let’s see…", Quaritch murmurs with a sharp grin, not even waiting for an answer as he adverts his gaze further down. And then, you feel his hands on your waist again, pulling at the soft fabric of your lace panties– down, down, down, until they pool at your ankles.
You can’t bring yourself to look at him, don’t want to see his face as he stares right at your most private parts. Too embarrassed, you just glance down on yourself, too.
"Oh, it did! Look at that", the Colonel exclaimed with a chuckle, and your eyes follow his, to where a wet patch had formed on your underwear. "You really are something, aren’t you? Got myself a little exhibitionist, huh?"
Words were still caught up in your throat, so all you could manage to do in place of a verbal response, was look back at him with a flustered face. He clearly meant to tease you, maybe even humiliate you, so why did his words turn you on so much? Your thighs almost automatically pressed together in desperate need for friction.
Quaritch’s hands are large and rough, fingers long and thick. Perfect and so incredibly warm against the skin of your lower abdomen as he slides a single digit between your thighs. His knuckle brushes against your clit, forcing a breathy moan through your lips as he drags his finger back and forth between your folds. His other hand goes tight around your hip, fingertips digging into your inked flesh in an effort to keep you right there, sensing how your knees begin to buckle just from a simple touch like this.
"You’re dripping", he coos, pulling his finger back up for you to see. "Look, that cute little pussy‘s getting wet so easily."
Nervously biting the inside of your cheek, you lock your eyes on his digits, glistening in arousal, and the sight makes more wetness pool between your thighs.
"Now show me", Quaritch all but orders, "Show me how you made these photos. I want to see you touch yourself for me, cherry."
The given nickname he used on you made you blush. The first time you head him use it, earlier, you thought you might have misheard. But now you finally realize that he had really called you that. Cherry. Clearly an innuendo to your tattoo.
Nodding, you step back until your heels touch the edge of your bed and then settle to sit right there. It felt strange, being watched like that. Quaritch leaned back in his chair, making himself comfortable for the show that he was hoping you would soon put on for him.
With a shaking breath, you leaned back until you laid flat against the soft mattress. Angling your legs up, you can’t bring yourself to spread them right away. Instead, you close your eyes and imagine yourself alone in your room. It’s easier to get yourself in the mood without the thought of his eyes on your naked form, watching so intensely.
In your head, you try to remember what to do. It wasn’t like you haven’t already done this before, like you didn’t know how.
There was no denying that you liked to touch yourself, late at night when you were quite sure everyone was fast asleep. You‘ve always spent your days with your mind full to the brim with various theories, studies and seemingly endless responsibilities, so much so that you often found it difficult to empty your mind for sleep. Sometimes you would recite the na’vi names of plants to yourself in your head ("Panopyra, Pamtseowll, puríhsa..."), over and over, like counting sheep, trying to memorize their names. But some other times you simply preferred another method of relaxation.
So, it wasn’t like you didn’t know what to do. It was just, that this was the first time someone was there to watch you doing it, and it felt like your brain was close to a short circuit.
Swallowing down the nervousness as best as you could, you let your hands run down your curves, feeling the soft swell of your breasts, over your stomach and down between your legs.
As you part them, ever so slowly, you hear Quaritch groan in approval. Still, you try to ignore it, focusing on the warmth of your skin instead, feeling your own arousal as you glide two finger through your folds.
Instantly, there’s this sensation, hot and burning and you allow it to rise within your core — allow it, and welcome it.
The slick, wet feeling gives you a gratifying sense of accomplishment, fueling you to circle over your clit, gentle at first, but slowly adding more pressure over time. Your other hand clasps over your mouth, barely able to stifle a moan as the other finger that had been teasing your entrance slowly slips inside.
"Don’t you dare cover your mouth." The Colonels voice makes you clench, which causes you to inhale sharply. "I want to hear you."
It takes every ounce of confidence you had left in yourself, to finally pry your eyes open and look at him from your current position, while you slowly lowered the hand from your face.
Quaritch was still sitting there, on his seat across the bed, unmoving. His irises had turned into slits, reminding you of a cat when it’s hunting a mouse. A metaphor that couldn’t have been more fitting.
With his thighs spread and his hands lazily resting on top of them, you actually found it quite surprising that he wasn’t… touching himself, too. Deep down, you were probably hoping he would do so. Were even a tad disappointed that he didn’t.
You could clearly see the bulge under his tactical cargo pants, could only imagine the way his cock must throb underneath the restriction of the fabric, and your mouth begins to water as your minds eye provides you with vivid images of him in all his glory. You wondered what he might look like. Did the color match the rest of skin? Did he had stripes and freckles?
Breathlessly, you feel your head dip back further, as you recognize the heat slowly building, radiating from your core. Gyrating your hips, the feeling of wetness and pleasure builds within yourself, enough to make your hip buck up against your own hands.
"Wanna know what I’ve been wondering?", Quaritch asks and it takes you a second in the haze of your mind, to proceed what he had just said.
You nod, once.
"I‘ve been wondering what you were thinking about while taking all these dirty pictures for me."
You’ve never thought hearing someone’s voice would turn you on this much, but here you were, dipping your middle and ring fingers past your tight entrance, gently but firmly making their presence feel inside. They’re surrounded by that slick, growing warm feeling as you press them in further, just barely curling them up. It’s tight, too tight, you’re afraid you‘ll hurt yourself if you add another.
You hear him chuckle, low and deep, as you exhale shakily. Then his eyes travel lower, pointing to the space between your thighs, were two of your digits were now buried deep, "What were you thinking while you stuffed those pretty fingers into your cute little cunt, huh?"
It takes a few tries, the tension slips for a moment or two, but soon, you find the right angle to allow your slippery fingers to caress the spot you‘ve been seeking.
"You. I was…", you swallow thickly, "thinking about you."
"Bit more specific, cherry."
More pleasure begins to wash over you, not unlike waves washing ashore, as you build up the tension your body craves you to chase. His words clearly meant to tease, sent your heart a flutter, legs flexing and bending, hips pressing into the mattress, back arching as your head once again dips back and the ministrations of your fingers find a sensual rhythm.
You curl them up, dragging them along your soft, spongy walls and you moan, gasping and panting, "I was imagining what you would do with my photos. If– If you’d like them. Was thinking about you… jerking off to them, t-too."
"S‘that so?", the Colonel snickers. You hear the sound of fabric, rough hands running up and down muscular thighs, a chair creaking again, as if he repositioned himself. "Well, you’d be more than happy to hear that I did have a good time with these photos then."
Your toes curl tightly as you approach what might just be the state of bliss you‘ve been seeking. The verge of Nirvana, quite literally, at your fingertips. Inhaling sharply, you feel that pleasure intensify and spread throughout your entire body. Your toes curl tighter, though you’re only vaguely aware of it for a moment.
"F-Fuck", you gasp, fingers speeding up their pace, faint squelching sounds reaching your ears and distantly, you feel your own slick run down the curve of your ass, soaking the sheets below.
"Language", Quaritch hisses and your hips rise as if trying to chase the source of his voice.
"S-Sorry, sir", you all but moan, "It’s just- I‘m close, so close!"
"Yeah? You’re gonna make yourself come?"
You can only nod your head at that, face flushed and teeth biting into your lower lip to prevent yourself from moaning entirely too loud, embarrassing you further than you already were. God, you were a mess. You didn’t know if it was truly as humiliating as it felt, to be bought to the edge within minutes, just from touching yourself in his presence.
The sound of your whines and moans start to increase in volume the more pressure you put on your clit, moving a finger over that little bundle of pleasure in fast, tight circles.
You’re so close. So, so close. Almost there, just a little more. More. More. More. Right there—
But then the sound of a voice, a voice of sheer authority curses through your entire being, haltering your movements and slowing them down as if he had a firm grip on your wrist with his words alone.
"Didn’t recall giving you permission, though. Try again."
With a sound somewhere between a frustrated groan and a high pitched whine, you begin to chant pleas like they are prayers, "May I cum? May I please cum, sir? Please, please, please!"
You curve your finger a little more and pick up the pace again, thrusting them faster with every word, every plea, until tears begin to prick and the corner of your eyes and your back arches off the bed, twisting and trembling from holding it in. It was all heat and pleasure. All those sensations, thoughts and emotions. Everything so close, but you just couldn’t reach it. Not yet. You felt like a puppet on a string, waiting for him to pull the right thread and help you to your release.
You’re right on the edge, right there. Hell, you‘d been on edge for the last couple of months. The moment Miles Quaritch had entered your life, you had been on edge, and today might just be the day everything goes to hell.
"Good girl", Quaritch purrs, the sound coming from deep within his chest, so full of satisfaction as he finally granted you the permission to, "Go ahead then. Come for me, cherry."
The gasp hadn’t even fully left your throat and you were a little more than just a trembling, incoherent mess by the time you came, clamping down around your fingers and pushing them in as deep as they could physically reach.
The squelching sounds your orgasm coaxed out from between your thighs filled your own ears, growing louder by the second. It was only overturned by the sound of blood rushing to your head from holding your breath until the first wave of electricity shocked through every fibre of your being.
Then, the blissful sensations of sexual gratification engulfed you. You felt the pulse of your throbbing clit right underneath your fingertips, velvety-like walls tightening around your digits in pulsating waves, intensifying the sensation that dared to consume you whole.  
For a timeless moment, there was nothing but pure, unadulterated bliss, with stars dancing behind your eyelids and a sound close to the static white noise of an old tv in your ears, before all your sensibilities gradually returned to you like a balloon gently floating back down to earth. Your whole body was buzzing in the afterglow of your orgasm, so intense it surprised you that this was all done by yourself. The internal buzzing seemed to be loud enough for you to overhear the distant sound of a door, your door, closing shut.
You didn’t even notice how tightly you had squeezed your eyes shut, until you slowly opened them again.
As your shaky, thrilled body slowly rises and you prop yourself up on your elbows, it finally clicks within your mind that you’re alone. You blink a few times, glancing at the empty seat in front of your bed.
He’s gone.
He had left, the man that was just there, the man that had been staring at you, watching you this entire time, like you were a sample in a laboratory for him to analyse, an experiment that he wasn’t sure turned out quite right. But his eyes, his eyes that were looking at you so intensely, had been… there had been something. There was something in them, a spark that you surely didn’t just imagined. Sometimes you couldn’t quite put a name on just yet.
Miles Quaritch may be an asshole, but he didn’t just play with you for the fun of it, watched you come undone in your room, on your bed, your safe space, with your legs spread wide like you would do that for just anyone and then leave.
But he did.
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Hey! Can you write a long one shot where Lo'ak/Neteyam is in a serious relationship with a human girl ( they are around 20 years old), and she hears Neytiri talking to Jake , saying that your relationship is impossible, bc you can't procreate. Then the reader sits alone crying bc she really wanted that to happen. Lo'ak/Neteyam finds her and comforts her. Then eywa sees how much they love each other and blesses their union with a pregnancy where the reader survives it? It would be more like a spiritual conception, it doesn't need to be anything sexual if you don't feel comfortable writing it. Mo'at or Ronal would be the ones to tell the news, since they are tsahik. Idk, I just wondered how this pregnancy/baby would be like. I even pictured Lo'ak/Neteyam laying their heads on the reader's stomach caressing and kissing it, calling the baby 'our little miracle'
Spiritualis Conceptio
Tags: AgedUp!Neteyam x Human!Reader, Oneshot, Avatar 2, Fem!Reader, Pregnancy, Like Spiritual??, Also Bonus Uncle Lo’ak
Warnings: Major Avatar 2 Spoiler
Years pass, and you and Neteyam have been living together peacefully with the Metkayina clan. It has always been a dream of yours to have a family, but as a human on Pandora, you know that's not physically possible when your lover is from another species.
I'm gonna be real with you, I had zero clue how to write this. I seriously needed a couple days to mull over how this would work. Would reader pull a Bella Swan? Who knows! This is lowkey a load of bullshit! Also please keep in mind that although I'm writing this, I am a minor and chose to write this non-sexually and went with the spiritual route. I think this falls under more cute domestic scenarios overall anyway so, WHO DOESN’T WANNA SEE DAD NETEYAM???
* ˚ ✦ 1767 Words • Read below the cut
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╭┈─────── ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-╰┈➤ ❝ [02/01/23] ❞ 
You wrung your fingers together as you meandered along the beaches of the Awa'atlu village, contemplating mundane matters. One in particular that piqued your interest was something you had been thinking about for a considerable amount of time; a family.
You and Neteyam had been together for several years; you were both adults who had been dwelling with the Metkayina clan for the last decade or so. You'd left the Omaticaya clan with him, hoping to remain near to him wherever he traveled. You believed it was remarkable that he survived after being shot all those years ago, and since then, Neteyam has promised never to leave you.
And since then, you’ve felt like you wanted to further your relationship with him. To have a family with him. It warmed your heart to think of the way he would be with his children. Would he be like his own father, protective and caring? Strict yet present? Or would he let loose, and be carefree with them? These were the questions you ached to know the answers to.
It's not as though Neteyam was oblivious to your desires. In all honesty, he was thrilled that you wanted a family, but you two had never seriously discussed the crux of it beyond the concept itself. Perhaps it was wishful thinking on your behalf, but you sincerely hoped it would be achievable someday.
After a short while, you became bored and weary from strolling over the sand for so long. You decided to return to your humble home, which, despite its small size, contained many fond memories for you. Your ears perked up at the sound of a woman's voice before you could whisk the portiere aside.
Neytiri.
Neteyam had been waiting for you to return from your beach promenade, but when the curtain to your front door was swept away, he was greeted by the sight of Neytiri and his father instead, who had arrived moments before you. He welcomed them, intrigued as to why they were searching for him and bearing poignant expressions.
You hid beside the doorway and eavesdropped. You knew you shouldn't listen in on other people's conversations, but when your partner's mother was arguing with him inside your home, whom can criticize you for wishing to hear?
You subsequently regretted that decision because you wished you hadn't. Neytiri didn't take her time stating what she intended to say; she spoke it bluntly and firmly, as one would expect from someone of her character. She was always this way.
“Your relationship with the human girl is impossible.”
You felt your heartbeat quicken. What?
It seemed as though Neteyam had the same reaction as you (albeit unaware of your presence), as he immediately shot up from his seat.
“Now is when you choose to tell me that? You had years to disapprove of Y/N! What changed?” he was not happy.
Jake sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “We overheard you both, talking about wanting a family.”
Neytiri interjected. “It will not happen. It cannot, you are not even of the same species! She belongs with her own people!”
Why were they so adamant about this?
“She is a human girl! You cannot procreate, yet you talk of wanting a family?”
“And? Look at Kiri! She had a human mother!”
Jake placed a rough hand on his son’s shoulder. “Kiri was conceived from Grace’s avatar, Neteyam. No one has ever seen or heard of a human being giving birth to a Na’vi child, let alone be pregnant with one.”
He brushed his father’s hand off of him. “It doesn’t matter.”
You were devastated. You were aware that Neteyam's family had reservations about you, but were they always this antagonistic to your relationship? You opted not to enter your home, tears welling up in your eyes. You dashed away, but before you could truly escape, Neteyam pulled the curtain aside to leave. He spotted your sprinting figure as he grumbled over the discussion he had just seconds before.
He groaned as he raised his palm to his forehead. “Shit.”
Neteyam broke into a run to chase after you.
...
You hid behind some rocks, huddling into your body so that you could cry without anybody finding you. Well, almost. Neteyam emerged from behind one of the boulders you were situated in front of, and sat down carefully so as not to scare you off.
His eyebrows were knitted together in concern. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
You wiped your puffy eyes and sniffled. “I heard Neytiri telling you we can’t be together.”
Neteyam embraced you and stroked your hair.
You began to weep again as you sank into his touch. “I really wanted to have a family with you, but I don’t think that’s possible...”
Neteyam felt a wave of guilt surge through him. Perhaps you wouldn't have been crying if you'd fell in love with a human male instead. Nonetheless, he delicately nuzzled you, trying to soothe your pains.
“It’s okay. I don’t care what my mother says.”
When you glanced up at him, he planted a tender kiss against your lips to quell your sobs. You lamented the absence of them when Neteyam stood up and extended his hand for you to take.
You accepted it tentatively, finally putting an end to your sobs. “Where are we going?”
He gave you a soft smile. “You’ll see.”
...
Thank goodness Tsireya also taught you breathing exercises.
When Neteyam said he’d take you somewhere, you didn’t expect it to be the goddamn spirit tree.
You were underwater, squeezing Neteyam's hand as he approached the foliage. He had informed you beforehand that Eywa might hear his prayers, which is why you were here.
You maintained your grip on his hand in trepidation. Neteyam drew his braid over his shoulder, and nodded once more before attaching his queue to the tree.
You could tell he was begging Eywa to bless you both with a child. You sensed tingles across your skin as you felt the energy of the tree move through your lover, wondering whether your family's future was not completely lost after all.
Once Neteyam finished his prayer, he disconnected his queue and helped you swim back up to the surface.
...
You felt ill.
Seriously, terribly ill. You assumed you ate something unpleasant because you became queasy out of nowhere; what was wrong with you?
Neteyam voiced his concerns about the state of your health, and said that he would leave for a moment and bring back the village Tsahìk.
Ronal stepped inside your marui, and raised an eyebrow at your figure. Why did Jake Sully’s son bring her to you? “She is a human, what could I possibly do to aid her?”
Neteyam grumbled, then admitted to what he had done the few days prior. “We visited the spirit tree, and I prayed to Eywa for a baby. Now Y/N is suddenly sick, and I don’t know why!”
Ronal was taken aback for a time. She gazed at Neteyam, puzzled, then swiftly kneeled by your side. She placed her tools near your head, and you began to groan in agony, sweating from the aching in your body.
Ronal shot a glare towards Neteyam. “You, make sure nobody steps foot into this marui!”
Neteyam was a little slow in processing Ronal's order, but he promptly walked towards the entrance to maintain a watchful eye as she toiled. She spoke in Na'vi, and pressed her palm against your abdomen to interpret Eywa's will.
...
“This human girl, she is pregnant.”
You propped yourself up on your elbows, utterly astonished. Ronal had helped to relieve the cramps in your body, but that was overshadowed by the shock you and Neteyam were experiencing at the revelation of your pregnancy.
“I don’t know how this child came to be, but it is clear Eywa’s will has been told.”
You couldn’t help but intercede. “But, Jake said no human has ever been pregnant with a Na’vi child! How is this possible?”
Ronal sighed. “We do not know if this is a Na’vi child yet, but this is clearly some form of spiritual conception. We will simply have to wait and see how the pregnancy goes.”
...
This was not a normal human baby.
The more time passed, the more visible your bump became. Ronal had only alerted Neteyam's family about the pregnancy in case something went wrong with the baby. However, it was becoming increasingly impossible to conceal your body's visible baby bump. Neytiri was surprised at first because she couldn't believe you two had truly conceived a child.
The baby was developing well. To be honest, it was a little too fast for your liking, but it was fine. Aside from the occasional cramps and nausea, your health was excellent, and you were coping well with the pregnancy.
Neteyam was over the moon about your pregnancy. There were numerous occasions when he would lie with you, singing songs to your baby and wondered if they could hear him.
You hoped it couldn’t, because no offense, but his voice was awful. Neytiri’s singing genes did not pass down to Neteyam.
Your favorite moment of those instances though, aside from your lover's atrocious vocals, is when he would kiss and caress your belly while referring to your child as “our little miracle.”
On occasion, you two would dispute over the baby's gender or how much more Na'vi or human it would appear to be. You were certain that your daughter would seem more human, but Neteyam insisted that your son would undoubtedly look like a Na'vi. Furthermore, it was him who prayed for this! He essentially did all of the work!
You would argue that he’s not the pregnant one, and that you’re definitely having a daughter. No questions asked.
Bonus!
You had a son.
Everyone in the tribe was shocked when Ronal announced the pregnancy to them. A child who is both human and Na'vi? It was incomprehensible!
You were absolutely livid as you stood there, Neteyam snickering in the background. Eywa was truly a mischievous deity who relished in playing games.
Neteyam nudged your shoulder in silent laughter. “I told you we’d have a boy!”
You smacked his arm. “Oh, shut up! You weren’t even right about him looking more Na’vi!”
You two quietly bickered as Lo’ak held the infant. “Haha, I’m your uncle now! Look at us, we both have demon blood!”
He began to speak in a singsong voice, “demon baabbyy!”
The baby started wailing.
Someone seriously needed to take that child away from Lo’ak before he dropped it in the sand.
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“Where would be the fun in telling you the whole story?” the villain asked. They leaned forward in their chair, handcuffs rattling. “C’mon, you’re clever. Surprise me.”
“I know you’ve murdered a supervillain. An incredibly powerful non-human being. Someone, well, something I’ve been chasing after for years.” The hero crossed their arms in front of their chest. Was it really that easy? An entire threat being reduced to nothing because of the villain? “People might start calling you a hero.”
“A hero? Would that make me your what? Partner?”
“Well, right now you’re under investigation for murder. Even if it’s a supervillain, it’s still a crime.” The hero couldn’t wrap their head around why the villain would kill an ally that easily. It wasn’t like the villain was a particularly active one. More or less, they were like a puppet master, controlling other people from behind the scenes. That was dangerous enough in itself but the villain being active, being a threat instead of controlling the threads was even more worrying.
“You are the one who questioned the supervillain’s humanity just now. They’re something, not someone,” the villain pointed out.
That was foul. Using the hero’s words against them wasn’t new but both of them were fully aware of the contradiction here — was it wrong to kill a bad person? And was it right to get convicted for that?
“Is that a confession?”
The villain cocked their head, smirking even.
“You tell me. Is that enough to lock me up?”
“The evidence speaks for itself.”
“You’re drawing conclusions based on assumptions,” the villain argued. “And after all, they were a friend of mine. Why on earth should I kill someone who’s my friend?”
Indeed, the motive was the only inexplicable part in all of this.
“We have found samples of your DNA at the crime scene.”
“The victim and I used to meet there quite often to discuss work. You can ask my employees, I have a perfect record of my whereabouts for the last few months.” They looked the hero up and down, as if this was a date instead of an interrogation. They smiled when the hero’s eyes met theirs.
“You have bruises on your arms,” the hero pointed out. “The…victim was struggling before they died. There was quite the fight.”
Suddenly, the villain didn’t look as amused as before.
“You have bruises on your arms as well,” they said.
The hero blushed.
Unfortunately, a week ago the hero had actually attempted to take down the supervillain. They’d been beaten to a horrific degree and only thanks to modern medicine, they were walking and breathing.
Two days ago, some of the supervillain’s henchmen had “visited” the hero to make sure they’d gotten the message. They were still limping, refusing to go back to their medic again.
“My bruises are from practice. You can ask my martial arts teacher, I was with him yesterday.” They eyed the hero’s bruises, so the hero pushed down their sleeves.
The hero sighed.
“I’m sure all your ‘employees’ and your ‘martial arts teacher’ are in on this?” The hero closed their eyes, letting their hand go over their face a couple of times. “I know it was you. But…why? I’m a good detective. I will get more evidence. And I will most certainly figure out why you did it.”
The villain stared at them, their interest focused on the index finger the hero was holding up. They looked up at the hero eventually.
“Don’t break your pretty little head thinking too much about it, hm?”
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tojiluv · 3 months
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EYES DON’T LIE — choso kamo [chapter one]
﹟ description: IN WHICH a girl unwittingly becomes involved with a handsome stranger in a club, oblivious to his true identity of being in a famous boyband…OR IN WHICH you and Choso must conceal your secret meetings from your friends and his bandmates, especially from his younger brother and your best friend, Yuji.
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warnings: none at the moment | words: 1,289
note: choso kamo x fem reader. available on wattpad —babyatsumu
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"Is your brother finally back?"
With a radiant grin, Yuji vigorously nods, and his excitement is palpable from the gleam in his eyes. The news of his elder brother's return after almost two years apart has filled him with joy.
"He's been back for nearly two weeks, but he was staying at the hotel with the band to iron out some scheduling issues. He came home last night!" He exclaims, enthusiasm bubbling over.
Having completed your last class of the day, you step out of the door, and Yuji rushes towards you to share the exhilarating news. As you both make your way away from the building, you and Yuji decide to meet up with Megumi and Nobara at a cafe on campus to catch up on some homework.
You respond with a hum, reciprocating the grin on your friend's face. "That's wonderful news! What are your plans now that he's back?" Yuji leisurely walks beside you, arms casually behind his head, deep in thought about the possibilities. "Well, I don't know yet, but I think one of his bandmates is hosting a party this week to celebrate the success of the tour."
Hallow Domain – the boy band with a total of five members, Choso included. Yuji always mentions the band, but you never took the time to look them up, only catching a few songs that your best friend would insist you listen to. Their music suited your taste, appreciating any genre with a good beat and meaningful lyrics.
Yuji is their number one fan, especially with his older brother being an integral part of the group.
"A party, huh? Where's it going to be hosted?" you inquire, placing your bag on the table at the café before settling into your seat. Megumi and Nobara are already seated, papers scattered around them as they work, until the mention of 'party' catches their attention, one expressing interest and the other sighing.
"A party? Why wasn't I informed?" Nobara squeals, her papers losing priority.
Yuji chuckles awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck. "Well, it's a celebration for my brother's band."
"Your brother is back?" Megumi asks before sighing, "That means Gojo is back, damn."
"What's wrong with Gojo?" you inquire.
Megumi shakes his head, "Everything. But mainly, he used to babysit me most of the time when my dad wasn't home, even though I was old enough to take care of myself. He always bothered me."
Yuji chuckles, "Well, Gojo is hosting the party at his house since it's the biggest."
Nobara narrows her eyes, clasping her hands under her chin as she scrutinizes their youngest friend. "Are we invited?"
"Well, I don't think—"
"You better get us an invite. No. Matter. What," she seethes out slowly, glaring as Yuji flinches before nodding quickly. You chuckle at the scene as you proceed to work on your project that is due soon, while the rest of the group engages in a lively discussion (mainly Yuji and Nobara) about the upcoming party until your name is mentioned.
"Maybe you'll finally get to meet Choso in person rather than hearing a bunch of nonsense stories from Yuji," Nobara states, grinning at you.
"Hey, they are really good stories!"
"Keep thinking that."
"Why you—"
It's true, though; you've never met Yuji's older brother since you became friends two years ago. Nobara and Megumi have already met Choso and the rest of the band due to their connections and having known Yuji since high school. You've met some of the bandmates, such as Satoru Gojo and Suguru Geto, as they had breaks in the middle of the tour for a couple of days. Still, every time you had the chance to meet Choso, something always came up that prevented the encounter.
Yuji has shown you pictures of the man, but they were pretty old, and apparently, Choso hated having his picture taken most of the time. Yet, the stories your best friend has shared have made you appreciate how Choso always prioritizes Yuji, especially being the only blood family he has left besides their deadbeat mother.
You shrug, "I doubt I could go, I have some homework to catch up on."
Nobara whines, "What? No, you have to go! It will be a lot of fun, and you'll regret not coming, come on!"
"You know she's right, homework is more important," Megumi comments lowly, his eyes focusing on his paper as Nobara glares at the Sea Urchin.
"Stay out of this, you're making it worse!"
He shrugged, not really caring for his remark, "I was just stating the facts."
Sighing, you know that Nobara won't let this go until you say yes, and you don't feel the energy to go, especially since you already went partying almost two weeks ago at a club with her and Maki. But the girl keeps begging, and you know she won't stop anytime soon, as you can see Megumi plugging his ears from the whining.
"Fine! I'll go, but please stop the begging," you exclaim, annoyance evident on your face from the pressure.
Nobara grins, sitting back down in her seat in victory with no complaints as the dark-haired male shakes his head at your response for losing your main focus.
"You will thank me later for this! Plus, you'll meet Choso, he's quite the looker, you know." She winks while Yuji scrunches up his face in disgust.
"That's my brother, don't say that stuff," he whines, covering his ears.
Nobara rolls her eyes, waving their friend's tantrum away. "What? That your brother is hot? It's just an observation."
"Yeah, a disgusting one at that! None of you can think like that about my brother, that's just weird and would be going behind my back," Yuji claims, shivering at the thought of one of his friends hooking up with his half-brother.
Chuckling, you place your hand over his in comfort, "Don't worry, Yuji. She's just making jokes, right Nobara?" The ginger rolls her eyes, "About him being attractive? Nope."
You glare, urging her to just resolve the issue.
"Yeah, yeah. That won't happen, relax, Pinky." Nobara sighs, looking at her pedicure without care. Yuji's eye twitches, "I told you to stop calling me Pinky!"
"Well, your hair is pink if you haven't noticed,"
"That's not what I mean!"
You and Megumi sigh, already annoyed with the constant arguing that happens at least once every day. Standing up from your seats and grabbing your bags, you both choose to ignore the bickering friends and decide to head out to focus better.
"They never will stop, will they?" You question, linking arms with the taller boy who shakes his head. "It's funny if you think there's a chance they ever will."
"Hey, don't leave us here!"
As you and Megumi walk away from the cafe, leaving behind the chaos of your friends' arguments, you can't help but laugh at the familiarity of their interactions. Despite the constant bickering, it's clear that your group shares a strong bond.
Megumi holds a ghost of a smile, glancing at you. "They're a handful, but I wouldn't trade them for anything."
You chuckle, "True. It's never a dull moment with them around."
As you stroll across the campus, the conversation shifts to the upcoming party. Megumi, always the reserved one, seems less enthusiastic about the idea of attending a celebration. However, you can't deny a slight sense of curiosity about meeting Yuji's older brother, Choso, in person.
"So, any tips on surviving a party hosted by Gojo?" you ask, raising an eyebrow.
Megumi sighs, "Prepare for chaos. Gojo knows how to throw a wild party. Just go with the flow and try not to get involved with any of the members."
Noted, you think.
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⇽ meet the characters | chapter two ⇾
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© 𝐭𝐨𝐣𝐢𝐥𝐮𝐯 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒
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so-boredtoday · 10 months
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The Scent
Miguel O’Hara x Fem!Reader
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Summary: You've been transferred back to the general work zone without explanation after spending a couple of months working with Miguel. You decide to confront him about it but reason for your transfer is not what you expected.
Word count: 4K
Rated: M / NSFW
Tags/warnings: Mating cycles/In Heat, Biting, Scent kink, Knoting, Fluff, Smut, Oral sex, She/Her pronouns, Breeding talk, No beta reader we die as a cowards, Vaginal sex, Pet name, this is not good don’t let the tags fool you, Spanish.
Author notes: So here it’s the first one… I loved Miguel so much and the Oscar Isaac voice is a turn on to me so here we goo!
✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵
The following week marked the two-year anniversary of your arrival to the Spider Society. Jessica had invited you to join after you helped her deal with an anomaly in your universe. At the beginning you had individual tasks of little importance until your first team mission arrived. You had been assigned to Miguel's group for the first time, he didn't seem to care about anyone in his group, after a couple of missions you were able to start adapting to his rhythm, avoiding getting in his way and tying up loose ends when he needed it.
He liked working with you: You were efficient, something he liked very much and you were not intrusive which he liked even more, you did your solo missions on time and covered him perfectly in battle. You also brought him lunch without interrupting him and made his coffee just the way he liked without having to tell you how.
You did the reports better than anyone else and always had the answers he needed. Plus you are very good at talking to people, could see how you were genuinely interested in what others had to say. You were able to talk to him... which was not an easy task, at first you talked about casual things like Lyla's updates or Hobbie's disasters but soon you started talking about more important things such as the multiverse or even his family.
He had moved your desk into his office a couple of months ago, with the excuse that it would make the work more efficient. But the real reason was that he could see you from there even when you didn't realize it.
Jess started teasing him about how much he liked you but he would always deny it and end up grumpy. He didn't like you...he just thought it was nice how you smiled when something went right or how your hair fell a little messy over your face...well maybe he liked how you smelled… like black cherry and vanilla it was a pleasant smell that he began to get used to. Sometimes his office smelled like you when he arrived in the mornings which made him smile as he started with the day's activities, however right now your sweet smell had started to become a problem.
A couple of weeks ago something started to change in him. He could smell you even before you came into the quarters and being there next to you had become a living hell, your essence was affecting him in unexpected ways.
With you in his office every time you moved a burst of vanilla flooded the room, like when you stretched to straighten up or when you untied your hair it was totally intoxicating.
He felt the need to hold you in his arms and kiss you, just imagining it made his cock twitch inside his suit and it was getting annoying. He knew his rut was close but there were too many things to do in the GQ so he decided - for his own sake and especially yours - to return your desk to its original place.
It had been a couple of weeks of you working in your old space wondering what had happened. In addition to sending you as far away as he could, Miguel had been completely ignoring you and put you to Peter B's mission group. Something was wrong and you needed to find out.
You walked to his office to discuss but Lyla informed you that he was sick so he had taken a couple of days at home. Concerned, you decided to go to his house with a bowl of hot soup with the intention of helping him to get better, but above all to get some answers.
Lyla would help you to remotely open the door for you, the house was beautiful, with an exquisite Scandinavian style but with more earthy tones and small decorative accents of Mexican craftsmanship. Everything seemed to be in its place and there was no trace of dust anywhere. You left the soup on the open kitchen counter to check if he was okay but heard a noise in what seemed like the master bedroom, you approached and heard his voice through the door.
"Mieerda... I can even smell her in here" A knocking noise alarmed you a little and you opened the door cautiously. A book flew next to your head; the room was a mess with pillows torn, sheets disheveled and many items lying on the floor.
"Miguel, are you okay?" you asked as you walked in, his eyes looked confused to see you there "I came to drop off some soup for you...Lyla said you were sick and I was worried tha..."
"Get out of here." he said bluntly as he sat on the edge of the bed to turn his back on you, you walked to where he was “Que te vayas carajo”.
"No" you replied "You've been ignoring me all this time... you even took me back to the main work room... what's wrong Miguel? Did I do something to upset you? If so I didn't mean to, I apologize if..." He made a grunt interrupting you
"You didn't do anything wrong... It's my business go away please" He said with clenched teeth. You ignored his words and moved closer to face him. He looked feverish and he was sweating.
"Miguel you don't look good at all" You said ignoring his words putting your hand on his face.
When you reached his chest, Miguel gave a soft growl in response. His muscles were tense beneath your touch, and you could feel his heartbeat pounding against your hand. Despite this, he still wasn't saying anything.
"You have a fever Miguel, you need some medicine" You told him as you sat down next to him. He started to stand up to walk away "Let me take care of you Miguel" You told him by taking his hand. Miguel's eyes got a little darker, there was something in the air that felt heavy "Please".
As you spoke, Miguel let out another low groan from deep within himself. For some reason, hearing those words coming from you made him feel more at ease than before. He looked up at you, his eyes full of emotion. "I’m sorry," he said quietly. "But you can’t help me”
"I can't do it if you don't tell me what's wrong, trust me Miguel... I just want to help you" I said looking at him with genuine concern.
Miguel hesitated for a moment, but then nodded slowly. Taking a deep breath, he finally opened up about his situation. "I've been feeling these… urges lately they have become so intense that they won’t let me work." he admitted, looking away slightly.
“Urges?” You said confused. “What kind of urges?”
Miguel took a deep breath, hesitating for a few moments before speaking again. "Sexual urges… It comes with powers. I have them from time to time…" he paused before continuing “I had always been able to control them but… They get worse when you're around... your scent… It makes them worse” he confessed in a quiet voice.
"Oh..." You blushed at his confession. "I didn't know sorry… I was so worried… I thought I had offended you in some way " You replied "Or that I had inadvertently jeopardized a mission and I made you angry without realizing it" you continued relieved "I’m sorry Miguel” You told him sincerely “…But don't worry you just need a little help and you'll be fine"
Miguel's face softened as he heard your words. His eyes were still wary though, like he was waiting for something else. "Y-you are going to help me?" he asked softly, sounding hopeful.
"In any way I can" You said to him as you approached him again "Tell me how I can help you Miguel..."
Miguel looked at you with surprise, unsure if he should trust you or not. After a moment of hesitation, he spoke quietly "Pero Cariño… I don’t want to hurt you"
"What could be so bad that would hurt me Miguel?" You asked looking at him tenderly
Miguel nodded slowly, looking relieved. He seemed hesitant but determined too. As you leaned closer, he whispered "I want to bite you..."
"Then do it..." You told him as you moved even closer… Vainilla y cereza negra he thought as he closed his eyes, your scent flooded the room and then without a hesitation you kissed him.
As soon as you kissed him, Miguel let out an animalistic growl in response. You could feel his sharp teeth pressing against your lips, before he started to kiss back passionately. Soon enough, his hands moved up from your waist to grip onto your neck tightly, pulling you closer to him.
“Miguel…” you say with a sight
Miguel responded by deepening the kiss, his tongue exploring every inch of yours. His hand slid down your body until it reached between your legs, gently caressing your inner thighs. With each passing second, his desire grew stronger, making him more desperate to possess you completely.
Miguel's hand moved up to remove your jeans. Each movement was accompanied by a soft moan from you, heightening the intensity of the moment. "I want you," he whispered huskily, his breath hot on your skin “I have wanted you for months”
"Take me then" You said looking him in the eyes.
Miguel smiled devilishly before leaning in closer to capture your lips once again. His hands roamed freely across your body as he explored every inch of it, leaving trails of fire wherever they touched. You moaned softly as he pressed harder against you, letting out a growl of desire.
You heard the sound of the fabric of your panties tearing “Miguel… oh my god… they were brand new” You told him in a tone of mock indignation as he carelessly removed your button-down shirt and unclasp your bra to throw it away.
With a wicked grin, Miguel pulled away slightly to admire your exposed curves. Taking in each detail with his eyes, he then leaned forward to claim your mouth once more. As he kissed you deeply, he ground his hips against yours, sending waves of pleasure through your body. "Yes… I’m going to prepare you Cariñito”
You blushed when you heard the pet name again. His hands moved slowly across your body, exploring every inch of you with his fingertips. When he finally stopped on your pussy and then on your clit, he began to massage gently, sending shivers through your spine. "Are you already wet for me Preciosa?" he asked huskily.
As Miguel's fingers moved down faster and faster, your breathing grew heavier and deeper. His lips traveled lower, leaving trails of fire wherever they went. When he finally reached your most sensitive spot "I've wanted to taste you ever since I first smelled you...so sweet." The sensation was overwhelming, he started to lick your entrance and you closed your eyes while he made circular movements over your clit. It was overwhelming you tried to close your legs but he stopped them to continue devouring you, at some point your hands were on his head grabbing his hair as you began to tremble and a feeling of pleasure formed in your lower stomach it didn't last long before you were left trembling from the intensity of your orgasm.
You looked at Miguel, panting heavily. With a satisfied smirk on his face, he pulled you close and kissed you deeply, savoring the taste of your passion. “Are you ready to take me now Cariño?" he asked.
The interior of your thighs was all wet and your chest was rising and falling rapidly as you gasped for breath “Miguel…” You said almost inaudibly “Please… I need you…”
His eyes darkened as he heard your plea, and he knew exactly what you needed. Without another word, he take you and lay you face down on the bed and lift your hips positioned himself behind you. Taking hold of your hips, he pushed himself inside you in one swift motion. "Ohhh...yes..."
Your face sank into the mattress, silencing a little the scream of pleasure when you felt him deep inside you "My God... Miguel" You moan
As he continued thrusting deeply within you, Miguel let out a low growl that was part pleasure and part dominance. With each powerful movement, he reached deeper and deeper until he couldn't contain the need any longer. "So pretty like this… and just for me… you want me to fuck you harder right Cariño" he said between breaths.
Tears of pleasure streamed from your eyes and as you felt it deep inside, the angle made each thrust touch that soft spot "Yes..." You said in a whisper.
He responded by increasing his pace, pushing himself harder against you with every stroke. His breathing became ragged and his grip tightened around your waist, pulling you closer to him. "Yes… just like that preciosa, cum for me” he murmured softly.
"I’m close…" You moaned, my hands gripped the sheet as you felt him moving inside of you, his hands tightened on your hips as your walls began to contract in their length and your legs trembled trying to hold up.
With each wave of pleasure that washed through you, Miguel grunted in satisfaction and increased his speed. As your orgasm subsided, he slowed down slightly but kept moving inside of you gently, savoring the feeling of being close to you. "That's right, babe, feel it," His knot was forming inside you
As Miguel continued thrusting slowly and steadily, you felt his body trembling from within. With each movement, he seemed to be getting closer and closer to release. His knot was big inside and you could hear the soft sounds of skin slapping together echoing throughout the room, creating an intense rhythm between the two of you. "Take it… take it all of it”
His breathing was heavy and his grip on your hips tightened leaving a red mark. Suddenly, without warning, he let out a loud moan and released himself inside of you, filling you up completely.
As you lay there feeling satisfied by the sensation of being filled up by Miguel's seed. Miguel wrapped his arms around you tightly, pulling you close to him as he nuzzled against your neck softly. “I need to bite you honey”
You shivered when he put his mouth in the back of your neck and began to give small wet kisses.
As Miguel kissed your neck, you shivered in anticipation, enjoying the warmth of his breath and the gentle touch of his lips. You closed your eyes, letting yourself get lost in the moment, until suddenly, you heard a low growl coming from behind you.
Miguel slowly turned you around, you looked at him revealing that his fangs were now fully extended. His gaze was intense, and his breathing was heavy as he stared at you hungrily. "Don't move," he said in a low voice, before moving closer towards you. A feeling of dread settled in your chest and you closed my eyes in anticipation "Is it going to hurt?" You asked.
Miguel chuckled darkly, but there was no trace of humor or kindness in it. Instead, there was only an animalistic hunger mixed with lustful desire. Without warning, he grabbed hold of your waist firmly and pulled you close, pressing his body against yours. His hot breath brushed against your ear as he whispered. "Yes, it will hurt... but I promise it won't be too bad just stay still”
You let out a sigh with your eyes closed feeling his hot breath on your neck and suddenly a sensation of sharp pain flooded you as he began to bite you.
As Miguel bit harder, you let out a sharp gasp from the pain. You couldn't believe how strong he was, yet also gentle enough not to cause any more harm than necessary. Despite this, the sensation of being bitten made you feel like prey instead of a human.
Miguel's hand went down until it reached your pussy and to make circular movements on your clit. The sensation of pleasure that started to build up inside of you quickly overwhelmed your senses. Your breathing was heavier and faster as you began to moan softly in response to Miguel's hands. Soon, you were lost in a world of pure bliss, unable to think or control yourself completely.
"Vamos cariño, cum for me," Miguel said with difficulty with his fangs still in your skin. As you came closer to orgasm again, Miguel increased the intensity of his movements until finally, you reached your climax once more.
For a moment you forgot that his teeth were still on your neck until he let go. His teeth marks left behind a trail of red lines across your skin, but it didn't hurt anymore thanks to the numbing effect of his venom.
You were breathing heavily as he caressed you tenderly, helped you into his arms and then put his chin on your head. You closed your eyes for a moment as your breathing returned to normal "Are you okay?" He asked you softly
"Yes, I'm perfectly fine" You told him as you smiled, you turned to look at him, his hair was messy and his lips were a little swollen. "How are you Miguel?... I was able to help you?" You said whispering in his ear, he let out a small laugh. No one had ever seen him so relaxed, he looked you in the eyes and started to bring his face closer to yours.
His lips brushed yours for a few seconds and then he kissed you again softly, he took your face gently with his right hand and caressed your cheek. He pulled away from your face slowly to move down to your neck, he gave a couple of kisses on the bite mark and you closed your eyes at the contact "So beautiful… and just for me." He sat on the edge of the bed and carefully helped you onto his lap.
Miguel looked up at you with intense desire in his eyes as you lay on top of him. You both stared deeply into each other's eyes before he leaned forward and kissed you passionately. After several minutes of rough kissing, he pulled away slightly and whispered in your ear, “Ride me Cariño”
Having control after what happened before seemed a bit surreal. You kissed him again as you guided his length to place it in your folds, he let out a grunt as you began to push him inside you "Oh Miguel… you feel so good" You said to him.
Miguel let out a low moan as you rode him, feeling completely enveloped by pleasure. As you continued moving up and down, he reached around and grabbed onto your hips tightly, pulling you closer to him. As he continued thrusting upward, " Who owns this beautiful cunt??"
“It belongs to you Miguel…” You said in a needy moan your walls began to contract as you found the right angle, your eyebrows drew together and you let out a moan. “Only to you…” Miguel responded with a growl as he increased the intensity of his thrusts, pushing himself harder and deeper helping you. You gasped in pleasure as his movements grew more powerful, sending waves of sensation through your entire body when your climax came.
Miguel's breathing became ragged as he approached his climax, gripping you tighter as he plunged deeply inside of you. His eyes closed shut tight, groaning loudly as wave after wave of pleasure coursed through his veins. His knot feels big inside you, he trusted in you a couple of times and he cums again.
You felt his hot cum inside and looked at him as he kept his eyes closed. He looked handsome with his sweaty forehead and breathing erratically, he was still inside you without moving, you could feel his seed sliding down your thighs. That’s when a thought hit you "Miguel..." You said in panic "I'm not on birth control."
Miguel opened his eyes at the sound of your voice and looked back up at you with no worries in his face. "I know," he said softly, his expression turning serious. "In fact, I was hoping for that…” You looked at at him in confusion as he moved carefully to get out of you.
Miguel smiled reassuringly at you before leaning down to kiss you gently. "Don't worry about it," he murmured against your lips. "I'm not going to lie, I was thinking about it when I knot you."
You opened your eyes in surprise. "What are you talking about Miguel..."
Miguel chuckled lightly at your surprise. He kissed you again to stop your words, he moved closer so that his body pressed against yours. His hands began exploring your curves while his tongue explored every inch of your mouth. When he finally pulled away, he looked deeply into your eyes and spoke quietly. "Well, let's just say I like the idea of it," he whispered kindly. You shivered slightly from his words, feeling both scared and excited.
He continued kissing you and caressing your skin until you relaxed, it was then he carefully placed you on the bed so that you would rest. He stood up and walked to the bathroom leaving you alone on the bed for a moment reflecting on his words. After a few minutes he came out of the bathroom with a damp towel and helped you clean your thighs, he noticed how nervous you seemed. "Is everything okay?" he asked softly, kneeling beside you on the bed.
You avoided his gaze for a moment "Miguel... I don't think you're serious, are you?..." You said nervously "About the pregnancy"
Miguel looked at you thoughtfully before speaking again. "I don't want to scare you off, but... yes, I was serious about it." His voice was gentle yet confident.
You looked at him surprised, the idea of having a son with Miguel seemed crazy… you weren't even together... But that didn't stop you from fantasizing about what it would be like, the idea flitted through your mind as he caressed your legs lovingly and the more you thought about it the more it started to make sense. You guys were the best team in GQ and you spent all your time together even when you didn't have any missions. He cared about you as much as you cared about him, he knew you more than anyone and above all he understood you...
Before the rut situation and his sudden estrangement, you began to suspect that he liked you as much as you liked him. Hobbie annoys you with it all the time, Gwen encouraged you to be more flirtatious... Even Jessica hinted at how much he liked you sometimes but you were sure about Miguel’s feelings. He had never crossed the friendship line before this, that made you doubt ."Miguel…” You said with sadness in your voice “Do you really like me in that way or is this all just about your rut?" You asked
Miguel smiled gently at your question, his eyes softening with affection. "Is not about that…” He answered “I care about you… I always have," he said quietly. He said reassuringly. "I care about you deeply, more than anything else in this world. You're important to me” He paused for a moment before continuing. "I've been caring about you since the first day we met. I feel bad when you're not with me... you don't know how hard it was not being able to have you around"
Before he could continue, you kissed him with a tenderness that the two had not shared before. Miguel's face lit up with joy as he felt you kissing him like that. His heart was pounding faster now, but he managed to keep himself calm. He leaned forward slightly and brushed his lips against yours tenderly. "I love you Cariño" he whispered softly.
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cfiesler · 1 year
Video
I recently made a couple of videos about an interesting group project in my Online Fandom class a few years ago, so I thought I would share here, too!  
TL;DR A group of students who knew nothing about fanfiction before this class really wanted to study sports fandom, so they did a study about sports RPF. Their research question was: What factors contribute to which athletes are most commonly written about?  In case you don’t want to watch the video, answer below the cut...
(1) They compared metadata from AO3 to sports stats - winning teams, individual performance, etc. - as well as net worth of players. What they found was... none of those things seemed to matter. (But one of the other students in the class said, “Well did you measure hotness?”)
(2) In the second half of the class I distributed a survey here (some of you might have taken it, this was in 2018!) based on questions that the student groups composed. They had a multiple choice question about which factors people cared about when writing and reading sports RPF and the two most popular answers were “physical attractiveness” and “personality.” But they also analyzed open answers, and the two other common themes were friendships or rivalries with other players, and the writer/reader feeling a personal connection to that player.
This ended up being one of my favorite projects in the class because it sparked a really interesting discussions about methods and measurement and knowing the right questions to ask and how to ask them!
Also! I mentioned a scrape of AO3 data in the video. FYI this was only metadata, and it was also de-identified - basically just numerical data (date posted, word counts, hits, number of comments, etc.) and tags like fandom and characters. No story names, authors, etc. If you’re interested in thinking through research ethics for using fandom data, I co-authored a paper about that!
(Also I just realized that despite filming these videos two weeks apart I am wearing the same shirt, haha!)
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arminreindl · 4 months
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Varanosuchus: First Fossil Croc of 2024
We are two weeks into the year and we already had a bunch of big croc papers, so today I'll cover the first of the two new genera named so far. Varanosuchus sakonnakhonensis (Monitor lizard crocodile from Sakon Nakhon) is a small atoposaurid neosuchian from the Early Cretaceous of Thailand, a country that has seen a virtual boom in croc papers this past year between the description of Alligator munensis and Antecrocodylus.
Varanosuchus was a small animal, maybe a meter in length if a little longer with a notably short and deep skull and long slender limbs revealing it to have been at least somewhat terrestrial. We actually have a decent amount of material of this guy. The holotype consists of a 3 dimensionally preserved skull as well as assorted postcranial remains (vertebrae, ribs, osteoderms and limbs), there is a second skull of whats likely to be a differently aged individual also showing a 3D skull and well the third ones just a skull table but 2/3 is still great.
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Now this guy was an atoposaurid, which is a group of crocodylomorphs that lived from the Jurassic to the end of the Cretaceous, their last members existing on the island of Hateg some 66 million years ago. Atopsaurids were generally small animals with short snouts and longish legs. Some examples of atoposaurids include Knoetschkesuchus from Germany, Aprosuchus from Romania and Alligatorellus from France and Germany, all three pictured below, art by @knuppitalism-with-ue
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Now the matter of ecology for atoposaurids in general and Varanosuchus in particular is not clear. Altirostral skulls such as that of Varanosuchus are generally associated with terrestrial crocodylomorphs as best examplified by notosuchians. Their teeth and size both obviously speak against being shoreline ambush predators like modern crocs and their legs are straight and slender, suggesting they had an erect posture and not the more sprawling one seen in semi-aquatic forms. Though they could have still had some aquatic affinities. The authors for instance argue that the osteoderms, having plenty of pits, are more like those of an animal that spends time in the water and would thus use them in thermoregulation. So maybe they did enter water from time to time, somewhat like some modern lizards, tho I think its fairly certain that they spend a decent amount of time on land. The artwork below is the reconstruction from the paper itself.
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Another matter discussed in the paper is phylogeny, more precisely the relationship of Neosuchians and how Eusuchia is defined. On the first front, its worth noting that the paper recovered both atoposaurids and paralligatorids as monophyletic groups and had them be each others closest relatives, a notion that has been recovered before. More interesting perhaps is the fact that the next closest relatives to these two were hylaeochampsids and Bernissartia, which are typically recovered closer to modern crocs. Which in fact form a separate branch that is the sister group to all the afforementioned clades and taxa. And then you got goniopholids, dyrosaurs and pholidosaurs which are all more basal than the paralligatorid+atoposaurid+crocodilian group, which is back to the ordinary really. The second thing is the definition of Eusuchia. So for the longest time Eusuchia has been defined to include those Neosuchians that have choanae that are fully enclosed by the pterygoid bones (I know I know a bunch of anatomy stuff bear with me). So if the choanae was surrounded by the pterygoid, its an Eusuchian, if not, its more basal. Well, atoposaurids don't have that....BUT VARANOSUCHUS DOES. This, coupled with hylaeochampsids also having this feature and being recovered closer to atoposaurids than to Crocodilians basically suggests that the feature is not diagnostic for Eusuchia and instead appeared multiple times independently.
Moving away from anatomy and phylogeny and all that stuff, I think its very cool that croc research in Thailand has kinda picked up this last year. And fittingly enough some people have even worked on a short documentary covering the known diversity of pseudosuchians from Thailand, giving an overview over the named forms from the Jurassic to today, from titans like Chalawan to even these newest dwarf forms. While the narration is obviously in Thai, there are English subs and I highly recommend looking into it (even if I disagree with their depiction of Varanosuchus as arboreal, its perhaps overshooting the goal a little bit).
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Finally here's the paper itself (tho paywalled) New Cretaceous neosuchians (Crocodylomorpha) from Thailand bridge the evolutionary history of atoposaurids and paralligatorids | Zoological Journal of the Linnean Society | Oxford Academic (oup.com) and the wikipedia page I've been working on Varanosuchus - Wikipedia
I'll try to write up a post on the other new genus, Garzapelta, later this weekend so stay tuned for that.
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sluttywonwoo · 5 months
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instead of you [part thirty-three] || l.mh
pairing: [best friend’s brother] lee minho x college!reader ft. han jisung
summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either. 
warnings: swearing, angst, discussions of plane disasters, mentions of sex (mdni ; 18+)
word count: 3k
a/n: revamped my tom holland series from my main blog ( @wazzupmrstark ) to try and motivate myself to finish it!!
additional a/n: disclaimer that this chapter and the following chapters take place on oahu and kauai, hawai'i. i wrote this a year ago (originally posted on sept. 22, 2022) and included mentions of the negative impact and sentiment tourism in hawai'i procures, but it was before the fires in maui. i included hawai'i in their vacation in the first place because i'm part hawaiian and wanted to bring attention to our people's attitude toward tourists while also writing about the parts of the islands that i grew up loving. and i thought i should clarify that before posting, as i feel the context is important to precede what would be an otherwise distasteful choice if i had written this now. please keep hawai'i in your thoughts, mahalo plenty <3
series masterlist | early access to the next chapter on ko-fi
Predictably, you cried yourself to sleep. You debated over whether or not to tell Minho. He’d probably find out when he woke up in the morning but would he be mad if he didn’t hear it from you? If Jisung was right, he didn’t care about you at all, so why would you grant him the courtesy of a head’s up? You didn’t want to believe Jisung, rather, you wanted to believe that he had only said those things in the heat of the moment but at the end of the day, he knew Minho far better than you did. Whether or not he was telling the truth to try and save you or lying to hurt you was up to you to decipher.
You wound up texting Minho, ‘Jisung knows,’ without any other context and calling it a night. 
The next morning, you woke up to a message from Jisung telling you not to bother getting ready for the day and that he’d be going on without you. It was mostly a relief not to have to put on an act after everything that happened the night before but it also stung.
You weren’t very optimistic about repairing your relationship with Jisung, but any lingering hope vanished when he wouldn’t even look at you in passing in the hallway. 
You spent the entire day in bed, trying to distract yourself with anything you could think of to pass the time. You scrolled through social media until your timelines stopped refreshing with new content. There wasn’t anything interesting enough on TV to pull you out of spiraling so you didn’t even bother trying to find something to hold your attention. 
At one point you remembered the book you were reading but as soon as you opened it you were greeted by all of Jisung’s little annotations he had left for you. He still had your book and you wondered if he would ever finish it now that you’d ruined everything. 
You thought about texting him, just to check in or try and talk about things but you didn’t want to bother him. A couple of times, you almost texted him just out of instinct. You would go to send him a tweet that you thought he’d find funny and then remember.
Minho came by your room that night after dinner when everyone was back from the day’s activities. He knocked twice, letting himself in before you’d even finished telling him he could enter. 
“Care to explain what happened?” he asked, hands on his hips.
You shrugged noncommittally. “Jisung found out.”
“How? Did you tell him?”
“And ruin my own relationship with my best friend? Yeah, definitely.”
Minho rolled his eyes. “I didn’t come here to argue. I just want to know what happened.”
“Then don’t accuse me of shit.”
“I didn’t mean- I’m sorry. That’s not what I was trying to do.”
You sighed and signaled for him to sit down if he wanted to. He did, perching himself on the edge of the bed cautiously. 
“He knows because he noticed me sneaking out and finally decided to follow me.”
The color drained from Minho’s face. “So he heard-”
You nodded. “I don’t know how much, but enough.”
“Fuck.”
“Fuck is right.”
“He wouldn’t say a word to me today,” Minho said. 
“He wouldn’t even look at me.”
“I guess we knew this would happen eventually.”
“Yeah.”
“We fucked up.”
“Yeah.”
“You were right.”
“What do you mean?” you asked, furrowing your eyebrows.
“We really do deserve each other.”
Oh. What Jisung had said earlier rang through your ears again. 
“I guess I was.”
Just then, the door to the bedroom opened and Jisung walked in, scoffing as he passed his brother. 
“I should have known,” he muttered to himself. 
“Ji, look-” Minho tried, only to be immediately cut off by his younger brother. 
“Don’t. Please just fucking don’t.”
“But-”
“God, you never listen to a word I say, do you? Either of you?”
You wanted to protest that you did listen to him but you thought better of it. It wouldn’t help your case at all. Instead, you sat there silently like a child being scolded. 
“I don’t want to hear you explain yourself,” Jisung continued. “I don’t care why you fucked my best friend. I think the act in itself doesn’t need an explanation.” Minho opened his mouth to respond but Jisung cut him off again. “I don’t want to hear an apology either. I already know you don’t mean it. In fact, I think we’re done here so if you wouldn’t mind getting the fuck out of my room...”
Minho looked like he wanted to argue but likely knew it wouldn’t do any good so he simply hung his head and let himself out, bidding you a quiet goodnight as he left. You didn’t respond. You didn’t even acknowledge him. How could you?
“Don’t forget to pack your things for the flight tomorrow. It’s a long one.”
You sat there, stunned. You hadn’t expected Jisung to speak to you at all, let alone say something amicable. 
“O-ok thanks,” you responded shakily.
“I’m sleeping in here tonight,” he added. 
“Oh-” you scrambled up, preparing to leave but Jisung stopped you. 
“No, I meant with you. It’d look weird if I slept on the couch again.”
Of course. Keeping up appearances.
“Is it even worth it to do this anymore?” you asked. “I mean, it’s falling apart at the seams.”
“It’ll be fine,” Jisung argued. “It’s just a few more weeks.”
“Do you really want to keep pretending to be in love with someone you hate?”
He froze, still bent over his suitcase. Then he straightened up and turned to face you. 
“I don’t hate you.”
“You don’t?”
“No, I don’t think I could ever hate you. I’ve been trying, trust me.”
You weren’t sure how to take that. You weren’t sure how you were supposed to take it. You tried not to let his words stoke the embers of hope you were still clinging on to but it was already proving difficult. 
“Maybe with time,” you suggested. 
He shrugged. “Ready for bed?”
-
You managed to get some sleep, despite everything. It took a while for your heart to calm down as you lay there beside your (ex?) best friend who was already snoring softly. He had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. You weren’t sure how he was able to drift off so easily in spite of your whole friendship falling apart but perhaps the stress was only one-sided. 
You were the one being eaten alive by anxiety and guilt. All he had to do was mourn the loss of everything you destroyed. 
The hours of sleep you did get passed quickly without dreams which was unusual for you. Before you knew it, Jisung’s alarm was going off and both of you were groaning as you dragged yourself out of bed. 
You finished packing the rest of your things in relative silence. Neither of you had much to say aside from when you passed each other’s things back and forth from your suitcases. 
The sun had yet to come up when the rest of the Hans gathered in the kitchen with their luggage. Since the flight was over twelve hours long Jisung’s parents had booked the earliest possible departure which just so happened to be before the sunrise. 
The boys slept during the ride to the airport but you weren’t able to. You were squished between Jisung and Minho in the very back of the van, feeling like a pin in a grenade. They ignored each other, of course, both seemingly dead to the world. 
Minho woke up before Jisung. He glanced over at you and offered an expression of sympathy. You just shrugged in response. 
Sitting in the car like that caused your knees to brush up against each other every so often, each time you rounded a corner or went over a speed bump. Every time it happened you fought the urge to meet his eyes. The touch, be it fleeting, made your chest tighten over and over again until you were half-convinced you were going into cardiac arrest. Eventually, Minho gave up trying to give you space and just let his knee rest against yours. Funnily enough, it helped you relax.
“Sorry,” he muttered.
“It’s fine.”
He was so hard to read these days. Not that he was ever easy to read. You couldn’t tell whether or not he liked having his knee there. You weren’t sure why you were getting so caught up on it in the first place.
You longed to hold his hand. You longed to hold Jisung’s hand. But all you could do was sit there in between the two and wait until you finally arrived at the airport. 
Thankfully, Minho was sat with his parents for the flight, which meant you were squeezed in between Jisung and Felix. You gave Jisung the window seat, knowing you wouldn’t get any sleep yourself. He looked like he wanted to argue when you offered it to him but ultimately surrendered when he saw the look in your eyes. You compromised for switching halfway through since the flight was so long but even that seemed to be pushing it for him. 
It was funny how Jisung was still looking out for you after everything you had done. It was as if it was instinctual to him, to put you before himself. The realization almost made you tear up. Had you cared that much for him too? Or was it all one-sided? Either way, you were positive you didn’t deserve him.
-
Dom had chosen Hawai’i as his destination. A controversial choice, given the state of tourism at the moment, but it wasn’t like you had much say in the matter. Jisung had confided in you earlier in the trip that he had tried to talk his father out of it but that he couldn’t be swayed. 
“We might as well try to make the most of it,” you argued. “It’s like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, right?”
He shrugged. “I guess.”
The flight from Bali to Hawai’i was over twelve hours long which meant that you had roughly six hours to figure out how to entertain yourself before it was time to trade places. You could try to sleep but that meant leaning on Jisung and you were almost positive the last thing he wanted was for you to touch him right now. 
You didn’t feel like paying for the in-flight wi-fi so you had to get creative with how to keep yourself busy. You scrolled through your camera roll for a while but it just made you sad. The pictures from the trip were one thing, but then there were all of the ones of you and Jisung back at school. The further back you went, the happier you seemed. There was no way that was actually true, it was just putting more distance between what had happened in the present from the way things were in the past. That, and you had a tendency to romanticize the past. 
“Did you know flight attendants are trained to take oxygen masks from passengers?”
Felix’s voice from beside you pulled you from your spiral of self-pity almost immediately. You turned to look at him and cocked your head in confusion. 
“What?”
“Like, you know that whole spiel they give you about safety before the plane takes off? And they’re like ‘during the flight, oxygen masks might drop from overhead’?”
“No, I know all of that. Why would they take the masks from passengers? Do they not have their own?”
“They do, but they might need to move around the cabin when that happens in case of an emergency or something, and if that were to be the case, they’re trained to take masks from passengers to oxygenate themselves. They’ll give it back, but in order to do their jobs they might have to borrow one without asking.”
“What if the passenger passes out?”
“Then they’ll be able to help them! Because they’re fully oxygenated.”
You made a face. “I’m glad you’ve got the aisle seat, then.”
Felix shrugged, grinning. “It sounds fucked up, but it’s just logistical. Wanna know something actually fucked up? These seat belts are practically useless.”
“What?” you weren’t sure if you really wanted to know where he was going with this but your morbid curiosity got the better of you once again. “What do you mean?”
“Well, they help with turbulence and stuff but in the event of a crash, these aren’t going to do shit for us. They’re just here to keep us strapped to the seat so they can identify the corpses by looking at the flight log.”
You sat there in stunned silence as the information Felix had just told you sunk in. 
“That is... so dark,” you said finally. 
“Yeah, but isn’t it interesting?”
“I guess, but why did you have to tell me all of this while we’re in the air?”
“Because it’s relevant!”
You sighed and glanced back at Jisung who was asleep and slumped against the window. “Ready to switch?”
It was just a joke but Felix scoffed nonetheless. 
“I’m offended,” he whispered. 
“And I’m traumatized.”
“My bad.”
Somehow, Felix kept you occupied until it was time to switch with Jisung. You lost track of time talking to him about everything and nothing. Out of all of the Han brothers, Felix was the one you knew the least. 
You learned a lot about him in the six and a half hours you sat next to each other. You learned that he, like Jisung, had a passion for photography. He liked anime but manga adaptations always disappointed. He wanted to be a dancer when he was little, just like his big brother. 
When it was Felix’s turn to inquire about you, you were sort of at a loss for words. You had to tread carefully around how much to actually reveal about yourself. When to lie, when to stretch the truth. You were exhausted. It was exhausting. But Jisung had made it clear that this was still important to him despite you not seeing the point anymore. So you played along for his sake. It was the least you could do since you ruined everything else. 
You talked mostly about school, what you were studying, what you wanted to do with your degree... all the small talk that usually took place when you first met a person, not after you’d been traveling with them for over a month. But Felix didn’t know a lot about you interests wise so he listened intently and asked a lot of questions. 
When it was finally time to actually switch, you were half-relieved, half-bummed. Talking with Felix was fun but you hated lying to him. 
Jisung lifted up the armrest between you and him to let you slide over while he stood awkwardly in the aisle. 
“Do you want to use my hoodie as a blanket, baby?” he asked.
“Sure, thanks.”
He laid it over your shoulders after you got settled against the window, kissing you on the head and telling you goodnight. 
You shut your eyes and tried to relax but sleep wouldn’t come. You knew it wouldn’t. You took deep breaths in an attempt to slow your heart rate, lowkey considering holding your breath until you passed out. 
Next to you, Jisung was flipping through the in-flight movies. You could hear him tapping on the touchscreen, huffing in frustration when he couldn’t find anything he wanted to watch. 
“You okay, bro?” Felix asked his twin. 
You felt Jisung sort of shift, likely checking to see if you were asleep. He sighed. 
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Relationship troubles?” Felix guessed.
“Why do you ask?”
“You’ve been pissy for like, the past two days. I assumed it had something to do with your girlfriend.”
“She hasn’t been sleeping well,” he explained simply, lying through his teeth. Well, it wasn’t technically a lie because you weren’t sleeping well, but that had nothing to do with why Jisung was upset. “The exhaustion has been leading to a lot of fights.”
“Sorry, man.”
 “It’s okay. It happens. Not that you would know.”
Felix scoffed. “Ouch, I try to have a heart-to-heart with you and you go there?”
“This is a heart-to-heart to you?”
“You know what I mean. A real conversation.”
“Okay, but I’m right. You wouldn’t know.”
“Not all of us can have healthy relationships like you, Jisung,” he sighed.
“I know. I think I’m mom and dad’s only chance at grandchildren at this point.”
“Not if our brother has anything to say about it,” Felix said lowly. 
“What do you mean?” Jisung asked.
He sounded genuinely confused but you knew that internally he was panicking because you were too. You were still pretending to be asleep but you had stopped breathing, waiting to hear what he would say next. How much did Felix know? You and Minho weren’t great at sneaking around but you had at least tried to be a little careful. 
“You mean you haven’t noticed the way Minho looks at her?”
“Not really? But you spend more time with him. You know him better than I do.”
“Well, you should pay more attention. He makes it kind of obvious,” Minho muttered.
“Makes what kind of obvious, though?”
“That he wants her.”
“What?” 
“I can’t believe you haven’t caught on to him flirting with her.” 
“Well obviously he’s doing it behind my back so-”
“Sorry you had to find out this way,” Felix said, likely grimacing, “but at least she isn’t reciprocating, from what I’ve seen.”
“Yeah, at least there’s that,” Jisung murmured. 
You were able to exhale in relief, but only slightly. Felix didn’t know everything but he could tell Minho was interested which wasn’t a good sign. How long had he been picking up on that? 
Your best friend sighed angrily. “The one thing I thought Minho couldn’t take from me-” 
You bit the inside of your cheek, guilt consuming you all over again. 
“Don’t you think that’s a little dramatic?” Felix asked. “He hasn’t even made a move or anything, mate. I just think he thinks she’s cute.”
“With Minho, that’s enough.”
i'm sick so no tags :(( but i've got nothing else to do so here ya go, lmk what you think I always appreciate feedback!!
add yourself to the taglist here!
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✧ dedicated to that one anon that made me feel so happy about the siren kas au again!! also thank you mea for beta-reading this for me you are a lifesaver!! going to tag @xenon-demon and @chaoticlovingdreamer because i know you both were interested in this idea hope it's cool to tag you!! ✧
The first time it happens, it's not a big deal.
They were on their way to start a supply run, some small groceries, snacks and sweets, to try and keep the mood up.
He had already done his rounds, checked in on El (still exhausted) and Dustin (still sleeping with his head on his mom's lap; she's still wiping her tears away when Steve sees her) and the Byers (still huddled together, warm, loving). He felt a twinge in his chest at the absence of Lucas and Erica but he knows they're with their parents because they did a check-in literally ten minutes ago. They're safe.
Steve knows they're safe. He just wishes they felt safe.
A whole month of fear and caution but this time, instead of a couple of kids sharing glances across town, nodding and walking on, it's everyone in Hawkins, gawking up at the dark clouds without any idea of what's been happening under their noses for years.
He wishes they never had to find out.
"Hey," Robin says, grasping his hand as she steps out onto the doorstep next to him. "We got this, right?"
"Yeah," Steve grips her hand back, stroking his thumb over the ink doodles across her knuckles. Sometimes he thinks the only reason they'll make it is that he's got her by his side. "We got this."
She smiles a thin, watery smile, lifts up her mask and makes her way to the car. He inhales, covers his nose with the black bandana Dustin gave him and follows behind her, gripping at the cold, empty space in his palm.
The forest was always one of the worst parts of living in this house, but the darkness has turned it ashy and cold, like something out of a zombie movie. He wonders, as he stares through the trees, if Barb got to see the forest before she was pulled through.
That's when he hears the music.
An echo of a guitar strumming. It's faint, the sound warbling as the guitar gets tuned and re-tuned every few strums.
It's so quiet, he thinks, so why does it sound so close?
"Steve?" Robin calls out, her eyes as wide and beautiful and terrified as ever under her goggles. She stands next to his car, one hand tapping the hood nervously. "You ready?"
Steve blinks and shakes his head, the echo of the guitar fading away as he twirls his keys around his finger. "Ready."
Probably just someone playing around on the radio or something, he reasons as he starts the engine.
No big deal.
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Two days later and everyone is in the living room.
Everyone meaning literally everyone, even fucking Mrs Wheeler, all to discuss shelter for the families who lost their houses in the earthquake.
Steve's house is already full of most of the Party (Dustin insisted they use the name for the entire Upside-Down-Expert-Team), otherwise he'd offer it as a place for people to stay in until they can get something more permanent.
That's all this place is good for anyways. Just a rest stop.
"I appreciate that, Mom." Nancy taps her finger on the dining table, eyes squinting and lips squeezed into a very fake smile. Steve winces and starts to make his way to the sun room, gripping the blankets in his arms tightly as she continues. "But some of these people need -"
It's pretty easy to tune the discussion out, focusing on laying out the blankets and making as much of the space as comfortable as possible. The big windows let so much sunlight in, it's perfect for anyone who wants to soak up in the warmth. The only problem is the view.
He pointedly doesn't look at the pool, hands on his hips as he surveys the room, and that's when he starts to hear the guitar again. The strumming starts up quietly and washes over him, re-tuning itself every time he starts to rearrange the blankets again. A few minutes of tuning and it starts to play a song this time.
Steve tilts his head, staring out at the pool. Someone must have switched on the lights when it started getting dark.
When did it get so dark? He should go back and check on everyone, make sure they're comfortable. Is there enough space? Maybe he should redo the blankets?
The song soaks the back of his neck.
The blankets are perfect. He and Robin just can share.
It's so familiar, he thinks, as the water ripples with the wind. Something he's heard, but not listened to.
There shouldn't be any water in the pool. Why is there -
The song is slow, coiling behind his ear and gently drifting down his shoulders, making him shiver. He thinks he should know the music, humming along to it as the guitar starts to get louder. It feels nice, a comforting chill down his back that eases the tension of his wounds.
His wounds. Robin. Robin, his bat bites still hurt, why does it hurt so much, what's -
Oh, he thinks as the music plays even louder in his ear, in his mind, that's not the radio.
"Steve!"
Robin is crying, hands crushing his jaw, her face blocking the view of the empty pool. The music is gone.
"Steve, please!"
"Rob?" he croaks, swallowing the dryness of his tongue. His head feels flooded with a fuzziness, blood rushing through his veins like it was moving too slowly before. He blinks when he realizes they're outside now, standing between the pool and the house. It's still daylight. "What -?"
She pulls him into a hug, and he struggles, but manages to wrap his own arms around her, if kinda slowly. "You just - you weren't saying anything and started walking to the pool and I couldn't stop you -"
"Steve," Nancy says somewhere to his left. He barely manages to lift his head to look at her, blue eyes sharp and a Walkman held tightly in her hand. "What did you see?"
The fuzziness is fading away but his brain is still moving through a fog to connect words together. "I heard music."
Robin's face is in front of his again, eyes wide and beautiful and terrified. Oh, Robbie. "Vecna uses music now?"
"Not Vecna." Steve wrinkles his nose. "It...wasn't Vecna."
"How do you know that?" Nancy squints at him and he rests his forehead against Robin's, his bones melting into stone, too heavy to hold up. He hears the creak of the Walkman, Nancy gripping it tighter. "Steve, how do you know it's not Vecna?"
"Music w's nice." His eyes are closing. "Felt nice."
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After that, the plan was never leave Steve alone.
It made bathroom breaks awkward but Argyle was so chill about it that Steve didn't even mind after the first two trips.
El couldn't find anything Upside-Downy on him, and there was the entire town with Upside-Downy shit happening everywhere, so there wasn't really much more to the plan than him having a bodyguard.
They made a chart for their shifts. God, he loves these shitheads.
"Here, man," Argyle says quietly, handing over three slices of pizza with a wink. Steve thanks him with a real, if exhausted, smile. Sleep hasn't been easy for the past week. "Fresh outta the oven."
"You're a godsend, dude," Steve groans, blowing air on the pizza slice. Mike grumbles under his breath about "hair-bias", whatever the fuck that means. Erica just rolls her eyes and shoves at his head.
The Sinclairs are visiting today, the parents persuaded by Lucas and Erica's whining (and a little bit of Steve's charm) so they can spend more time at "home base" with the others.
They're sat in the living room, eating lunch as rays of sunlight shine on the food like some kind of holy blessing, with the rest of the Party.
The rest of the survivors would be more accurate.
He tries not thinking about it, tries to appreciate the warm cheese and loud laughter. There's too much to not think about. How Max isn't here, how she deserves more, how he wants to see her okay and alive and happy.
Eddie isn't here either, and he doesn't think about how much he deserved better too.
"Steve thought it was cool! Right, Steve?"
He wishes Eddie could have made it, that Dustin didn't have to lose him like that.
Hell, they could have been friends. Maybe buried the hatchet so they could make fun of Dustin together, catch each other's eye whenever the tone makes an appearance and just laugh whenever he wasn't looking.
"I said, right, Steve?"
Maybe they could have hung out. Steve would come over to his trailer - or maybe Eddie would come over for a swim - and he'd make fun of Eddie's taste in bands - or maybe he'd listen to him play his guitar, never looking away from those ringed fingers as they created wonderful, wonderful music.
"Dude?"
Oh shit, the music is back. That's probably not good, is it?
But it's so sweet. So calming and cool, like a balm against his torn skin, washing over the dark feelings that built up in his ribcage.
"Steve!"
The song ripples through his veins and he sighs at the feeling. The pool doesn't have water anymore, he thinks. He emptied it so long ago. The music is sad, and his heart clenches at the sound.
The lake has water, he thinks. And the song turns light, sweet, calling him, curling around him, pulling him towards -
"Sorry about this, dude."
"Fuck!" Steve gasps when he hits the ground, groaning as his back ache returns at full force. "What the fuck, man?"
To his credit, Argyle looks genuinely sorry and helps him back onto his feet, holding Steve up with a tight arm around his waist and a tighter grip on his wrist. His shoulder aches at being thrown over Argyle's neck but walking is a lot easier when someone else is carrying half the weight.
He feels so heavy now.
"What - happened?" Steve croaks as they hobble back to the house. When did he leave it?
"You just got up and you weren't -" Dustin swallows, his voice croaky like he'd been yelling. "It's like you weren't even there."
"God, you can't keep doing this, Steve," Robin smacks his shoulder with a tight smile, tears still unshed in her eyes. His chest aches at them. "How many times are you gonna walk out on me?"
"Sorry Robbie," he says and accepts her very tight ow, ow, ow hug with a sad laugh. "I don't know what's going on."
"Was it the music again?" Will asks quietly.
Steve looks at him, leaning his head against Robin's. When did he get so tall? When did they all grow up already? "Yeah," Steve replies, just as quiet. He swallows when Robin lets out a sob into his shoulder. "It was the same song."
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By the time his brain is fully functional ("Debatable," Mike sneers, crying out when El smacks him up the head), everyone's already discussing the new plan.
"We'll need to make notes, figure out the pattern, see if there're any triggers for Steve." Nancy said and he tries not to let it get to him, the fact that he needs babysitting now, that he can't do anything without being watched. "If the music makes people feel...good, it could still be a whole new tactic. Maybe Vecna wants our guard down, maybe he's countering our favourite songs, maybe it's a distraction. We have to be ready."
Steve still wants to grumble that it could never be Vecna, that's insulting, but he's too tired to argue about anything anymore.
They've even rearranged who sleeps where so that the Sinclairs can sleep over. They take one of the guest rooms while Mrs Henderson and Dustin join Steve in his own room. He almost loses his mind cackling when the both of them eye his wallpaper with the same mix of disgust and fascination. When Mrs Henderson sees the curtains, she almost gags and it's the loudest he's laughed in a long time.
"You're gonna be okay," Dustin tells him right before they fall asleep. Steve looks up at him from the floor where he lays, couch pillows doing more for his back than training against monsters ever did. "You'll be fine."
"'Course I will, dude," Steve smiles at him as Mrs Henderson leaves the room to talk to Hopper one last time. Tews is curled up on the bed, purrs loud, almost melodic, and lulling Steve's thoughts into a calm. "If the giant flesh monster couldn't get us, no way some wrinkly old naked guy will."
Dustin laughs outrageously at that and Steve wants to coo, wants to cry, wants to grip Dustin tightly in his arms and hide him away from the world, hide them all away in this empty house and make it full, make it safe for them, for Max, for Robin.
He doesn't.
He eventually falls asleep to the sound of Dustin muttering under his breath. And when Steve sleeps, he dreams.
It's so cold around him, so dark and empty. The sky thunders red and the cries of so many monsters echo around him. But there, through the cold and the shadows and the monsters, there's the song, calling to him.
I'm here, he thinks as he trudges his way through the inky mass of thick liquid, not water, not blood, but enough of both to make his steps heavy. I'm coming.
The song curls up on his skin, on his bat bites, soft and sweet and cold, like that time Robin spilled ice cream all over the -
"Steve!"
Robin. Where's - where's Robin?
Shh, it's okay. She's fine. Everyone's fine. Keep going.
Oh, he thinks. Of course. Everyone's okay, he knows they are, right?
Steve pauses his next step.
Right?
The song is even lonelier now and he shakes off the questions clouding his mind. It croons to him, so happy as he makes it through the ink to the shore. It sounds so sweet, that's it, keep going, come on.
He's crawling at this point, body heavy with the weight, until the song lifts him up onto his knees and he looks up to see -
"Snap out of it!"
Steve gasps at the sting on his cheek, blinking when light hits his eyes fiercely, shapes and sounds moving around him from a distance. There's a buzzing coiling behind his ears.
"Steve?"
Dustin's terrified face finally comes into focus behind his mother, who is standing right in front of Steve with her arm stretched across the space between them. Steve blinks, "Hold on, did you just slap me?"
"I'm so sorry, Steve," Mrs Henderson says and just like Argyle, she seems to really mean it. Does she? Her outstretched hand rests on his forehead as the other grips his upper arm. His back aches. His torso burns. Where did the song go? "We were so scared, you weren't saying anything -"
"I didn't hurt you, did I?" Would never, of course not, just needed to keep going.
They both deny it vehemently. "Of course not! You were just - staring. Out the window. At -"
"At the pool," Steve hisses, biting his lip.
"Yeah," Dustin breathes out, his eyes watering as he reaches out to grab Steve's wrist. "But you're - you're back now. We just - just need to slap you out of it. What's another concussion, right?"
Steve laughs because Dustin's voice is so choked up that if he doesn't laugh, he'll cry. He ruffles the curls of his hair with a smile. A sinking feeling claws at him from the inside of his stomach. Can't he listen to the song one more time?
"Steve?"
"Yeah, I'm here, I'm -" Steve swallows as the blood in his veins prickles. Won't you hear me one more time? "I - I don't want to listen. I won't."
"Can you still hear it?!"
Please? It would make us so happy, Steve.
"I - no, no, I -"
"Steve?! Guys! Code red, code red, please!"
Please, Steve. Please?
"Okay," he says, eyes drooping as the melody curls up around his waist, brushing against the inside of his skin, pooling around his chest, thrumming in time with his heart beat. It feels so sweet, so good, thank you, come here, come here. "Okay."
"El, do something, please!"
The song turns harsh, gnawing on his bones, piercing through his skull, pushing him to the ground as someone is interrupting, no interruptions, leave us alone, alone, alone. The pain builds up crawling and clawing up  to his chest to his shoulders to his head, his head, it hurts, it hurts so much, please stop, just stop. "Fuck, fuck -"
"Steve?" Dustin whimpers and he aches, he aches, he aches.
He screams.
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When he wakes up, it's to dawn creeping through the windows and rope around his body.
Red sunlight, just like in Mike's Superman comic books, covered by dark clouds.
A red sun to the blue moon. Right side up to the upside down. You to me.
"Whe -" Steve croaks, his eyes creaking open. Fuck, they're so crusty, that's gross. "Where?"
"Steve!"
Robin's face in front of his, beautiful and terrified. He squints up at her, glancing over to find Dustin and Lucas staring at him with wide eyes, Hopper behind them. They watch him and they nod. Others are coming in, Mrs Byers and Jonathan and Nancy -
Steve hisses as something claws through him for the fourth time that night, pain, pain, go away, go away -
"Shit, shit, shit, everyone get in position, -"
"Will, get over here, he's gonna -"
Come here, come on, please? Won't you come back?
"Where are you?" Steve murmurs as the pain turns into the music, gliding over him, like a wave coming to shore, pulling him back to the water, back to us.
"He's talking to the siren! Somebody get -"
Come here, come back, come to me. 
"Can't find you," he says, slurring his words as the song combs through his hair, like fingers scratching against his scalp. "Where're you?"
"That's it, Steve, keep talking, we got you -"
Want you here, with us, want us together, don't you?
"Yeah, yes, together," he sighs, the melody trilling in his chest, happy, sweet, soft, perfect, it'll be perfect, together, all together, just before someone reaches for his hand
He hisses and the song pulls away roughly, leaving him floating in the void, he cries out for it to come back, but he betrayed them, shouldn't have done that, Stevie, you tried to trick us -
"Shit!" Steve drops back to the bed with lead in his bones. El is still holding his hand. He was so close, the connection just barely at his fingertips.
Dustin swears as the others start to argue. The frustration is building up in the room, everyone too tense to think about answers, you sly dog, that was clever, but we don't like traitors -
"Wait, no," Steve gasps as something claws in his wounds, amused, you tried to trick me? Fine, no more playing around. "Fuck, wait -"
And the song crashes into the shore, pulls him down under where everything is sweet and cold, right back where you belong.
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It's so warm out here, between the trees.
The skin on his back was blistering, biting at his flesh, before the song had gently cooled it down. He shivers at the chill, smiling when the song pulls him forward, looping around him with a sweet hum. It feels so nice, to hear the song without any distractions.
Without any interruptions.
Keep going.
Steve sighs when the song runs through his hair, laughing when it musses it all up. His hand twitches, he wants to fix it up until it's perfect again.
Keep going.
There are noises behind him, the sound of running and metal-on-flesh. It's all so slow, even slower than him. He doesn't know what's behind him, just the dark and gentle song pulling at his veins.
Keep going.
He makes it to the water, to the lake. There is no moonlight, but the song guides his steps, keeps him light. How sweet, he thinks, how sweet of you.
He makes it until his waist is plunged in the frigid water and then the song stops. He looks around but can't see anything in the shadows. There are sounds of humans yelling, of monstrous shrieks behind him, but where is the song?
"Hey."
He looks up and sees crimson eyes, half-lidded, and a smile staring down at him. Massive black wings blow gusts of wind at him. He shivers, and gives a smile in return.
His song.
The wings slow down until big, red eyes are level with his own, curls of black falling with gravity to brush against his cheek. The song hums in his chest, satisfied, delighted and sweet.
"Miss me, big boy?"
250 notes · View notes
mrsjellymunson · 4 months
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S.A.N.T.A. BABY
[A.KA. Stupid And Nasty Tinsel-Related Activities]
A Festive 5+1 Eddie Munson Fic
Summary: 5+1. Five times reader embarrasses herself in front of Eddie, and one time she doesn’t.
Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader
WC: ~10.5k (oops)
CW: 🔞 18+ MDNI!, SMUT, NSFW. Strangers to sort-of-enemies to lovers. Drinking, smoking, Eddie and reader call each other nicknames, loads of embarrassing situations, swearing, suggestive language, implied birth control, description of and discussion about a sex toy, flagrant and unnecessary use of the number 69, reader has a tattoo but it’s not essential to the story so you can ignore it if you want, bondage fantasy involving fairy lights, lap riding/dry humping, Eddie has tattoos and intimate piercings, fingering, unprotected p-in-v (always wrap it irl!), aftercare, fluff, the Upside Down hasn’t happened. I imagine reader & Eddie to be mid-late 20s and it might be the 90s, but hopefully I left it ambiguous enough that you can choose. I tried to keep reader’s appearance neutral, though I’m still new at this and I may have missed things - let me know if you spot anything (likewise typos or missed tags, etc). The elf outfit in the pic is for costume illustration only and does not indicate reader’s ethnicity or appearance.
A/N: Written for @bettyfrommars’ & @allthingsjoeq’s festive prompt party (thank you, guys!); I decided to smoosh five prompts 6, 8, 12, 14 & 15 together to create… whateverthehellthismutantthingis 😆 It’s my first 5+1, and my first festive fic, please let me know how I did! 🎄 I’ve taken artistic license with the format - if I’ve understood it, it’s way too long for a standard 5+1, and I don’t think they usually have 4+k of unnecessary smut at the end (‘What do you mean, Kittie? Smut is always necessary!’). I couldn’t bring myself to cut it because I’m a deviant and to paraphrase the song, it’s my fic and I’ll add what I want to 😂 Enjoy! 🥂🍷🎁
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Christmas was never your favourite time of year. You suppose that your early Christmasses were probably happy, but once your parents split and family politics came into play, the season just became less enjoyable all round. These days your mom and stepdad tended to use the extended break to visit your brother in California, and this year will be the third in a row that you’ve been left to your own devices. Not that you couldn’t go with them, but you just felt a little out of place and in the way, him with his scrapbook-perfect family and kids, you with your alternative interests and a dress sense that your stepdad once described as, “Far too much black for a family dinner. We’re not the Addams Family, you know”.
This year, though, you were optimistic. It’s your first year away at college in Indianapolis, and your roommate, Robin, who you get on outrageously well with, has invited you to spend the holidays not too far away in her home town, Hawkins.
Plus, Robin has taken it upon herself to, in her words, ‘“Christmas Carol the shit out of you”, after you’d told her about your disdain for the holiday season and that Santa stood for ‘Stupid And Nasty Tinsel-related Activities’. She’d declared that this year you’d have the “Best. Christmas. EVERRR!”, and she’s making good on it, despite the promise being made months ago when you were both soaked in tequila at the end of orientation week.
It’s going fairly well so far. You’ve met a couple of Robin’s friends, a nice girl called Nancy and Robin’s ex Vickie, and together you’ve had a shopping trip, a lunch out and a girls’ night in. You’re optimistic that the rest of her friends will be just as friendly and welcoming. Next on the ‘Best Christmas Ever’ agenda? Seeing a local band at a local bar…
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“Honestly, they’re, like, really, really good!”
“Really, Robs? This band that your friends started in high school are so good that they’re still playing dive bars in their home town?”
The bar is dingy and grubby, but it’s packed, Robin insisting it’s because the band is great, but you suspect it has more to do with the cheap beer prices.
You’re not averse to live entertainment, you just prefer places with a bit more space. More ambience, less… sweat? Ambiguous stickiness??
Half a beer in, you make the excuse that you need some air, not admitting you’re actually hoping to find someone to bum a cigarette off outside, feeling your most recent attempt at quitting is already on seriously shaky ground.
There’s already a couple of guys around the side of the building when you exit the front door, one in a torn flannel and another, his back to you, in a heavier-looking jacket.
You recognise Flannel as the bartender, a lanky, but not unattractive, somewhat worried-looking guy with a grungy haircut and ripped Clash t-shirt, who’s just finishing his cigarette and flicking it to the floor. As he leaves to go back inside he offers a cheery half-salute to his smoking partner and a, “See you inside, dude.” You assume the other guy must be a regular, and from the subtle glimpses you get as he flicks his ash, he’s about halfway through his cigarette.
Whilst he’s not looking you sneakily take in the view (your excuse being that you are a tourist here, after all). He’s tall, dressed all in black, with broad shoulders draped in worn-in black leather, long dark curls falling about them. You can’t determine the exact colour in the poor lighting of the bar’s neon sign, but they look shiny and well cared for, rather than lank and grimy like so many of your college buddies seem to think is the fashionable way to do it these days (ugh).
Trailing your eyes down his back, you see the hem of his jacket half-obscures a black leather belt that’s just visible sitting on his slim hips. It’s studded with silver rivets and adorned with a variety of draping silver chains that jingle at the slightest movement.
Well-fitting, dark black jeans cover his legs, and a scruffy pair of heavy black combat boots complete the look. They're unlaced at the top and casually flare out, his jeans crumpling, effortlessly stylishly, in the tops.
The belt chains catch your attention again as he shifts from one foot to the other, making them swing, drawing your eyes to the seat of his jeans and showcasing a cute, tight, rounded pair of butto-oh! He’s turning around! Shit, shit, okay, be cool, and definitely don’t look like you were just checking out his ass…
He looks at you with surprise, he obviously hadn’t heard you come out. He’s taken slightly aback, but manages to greet you with a quick, “Hey.”
You reply, eloquently, “Hey.”
Smooth.
Leather Jacket gets out his lighter.
“You, uh, smokin’?”
“I was kinda hoping to bum one, actually. I’m supposed to be quitting, but you know how it is when you get around bars and booze.”
You shrug a little, suddenly feeling sheepish, and more than a little selfish when you realise your presumption.
“Oh yeah, I sure do. Think I’ve tried quitting about, what, five times now?”
He chuckles a little, shaking a stick out of the packet he retrieves from inside his jacket, offering it to you.
“You need a light?”
“Oh, uh, yeah, thanks.”
He leans in to spark his lighter, and you’re briefly engulfed by the scent of him. Old leather, hints of a musky, spicy cologne, whiskey, clean sweat, and, of course, cigarette smoke. It feels like a warm hug, but something else too, something more primal, enticing.
You notice his hands as he holds his lighter close to your face. They’re big, strong-looking and veined, his fingers adorned with chunky silver rings that glint and twinkle in the faint neon glow.
It all catches you off guard. You pull back quickly once your cigarette is lit, not ready to explore that kind of sensation right now.
He’s turned sideways to you again, leaning his back against the side wall of the bar. He smirks in your direction, a dimple popping in the cheek nearest to you, and you feel a little heat rise up your neck.
His gaze flows over your form, taking you in from top to bottom. Is he checking you out?
“I, uh, I like your boots.” He nods down towards your feet, flicking a little ash from his cigarette off to the side furthest from you.
You automatically glance down, like some kind of idiot who didn’t dress themselves less than an hour ago.
Sheesh, way to make an impression on the locals…
“Oh, thanks!”
You smile, genuinely pleased. You’re wearing your favourite pair, laced and buckled black leather New Rocks with a chunky, steel-coloured metal heel. You know the style doesn’t have universal appeal, which is of course part of the reason you love them, but it’s nice to have your taste appreciated by someone as cu- erm, as friendly as he is.
“I haven’t seen you around here before. You new in town or sumthin’?”
“Yeah, kinda passing through, I guess. I’m just here for the holidays, hookin’ up with a friend.”
He nods in acknowledgment, curls bouncing softly around his face.
You continue, “Apparently I’ve been promised the ‘best Christmas ever’, and they think they’re going to achieve that by bringing me to this divey bar to see some schoolfriend in a lame-ass metal cover band. I mean, god, no offence, but this town is hardly Seattle. I can’t imagine they’re gonna be Nirvana-quality, right?”
The guy snorts through his nose and then genuinely laughs. “Yeah, they probably are shit. Towns like this are full of wannabe rockstars straight outta high school, y’know?” You don’t notice how his lips purse as he suppresses a grin, as he continues, “Singers are the worst, always such assholes. Second only to guitarists, of course.”
You answer with an enthusiastic, “I know, right?!”, thinking back to the musicians you’ve dated since high school and how they were all convinced they were destined to be the next Eddie Van Halen or Steven Tyler. Thinking of a couple of guys in particular as you take a drag of your cigarette, as you exhale you mutter, “Christ, guitarists really are the pits.”
He snorts, smiling again, then drops his finished cigarette to the ground, crushing it out with the sole of his heavy boot. “At least with all their equipment and shit it makes them easy to spot.”
You gift him a smile and a small nod. “Yeah, I guess it does.”
“I’m heading back inside. Maybe I’ll see you later?” He quirks an eyebrow at his last comment.
“Yeah, maybe.” As he moves to open the door you add, ”Hey, thanks for the smoke!”
He turns back to you, his distractingly broad grin now fully on display, half-shouting back as he moves through the doorway into the bustling interior, “No problem, all you have to do is ask. I’ll see you later, Boots!”
You finish your smoke and get inside just in time to get to your seat, a tall stool opposite Robin around a high table, your back to the stage, as the band start up.
There’s a few complicated beats from the drums as the guy behind them warms up, and the bass and rhythm guitars thrum a few notes, garnering whistles and cheers from the crowd.
You wait for the cliché of the singer coming up to the mic and introducing the band, but what you actually hear is a low, self-assured, somewhat recognisable voice, that’s both commanding and sultry, that drawls, “You know who we are.”
Suddenly there’s a burst of impressive guitar work and drums, and the crowd erupts as the room is saturated with the opening chords to Black Sabbath’s ‘War Pigs’.
You’re impressed, and intrigued. This isn’t the ‘dodgy 80’s covers schoolkid band’ you were expecting. These guys sound… accomplished.
You turn on your stool, and notice a subtly familiar form at the mic. Less bulky as he’s no longer wearing the leather jacket, a ripped band tee now showing off his pale arms and clavicles, and black ink that you can’t make out adorning solid biceps and veined forearms. Guitar in hand, confident, brash, cute. Chains dangling from a studded belt, silver rings glinting, hair flying as he flicks his head, commanding the stage, readying himself to sing the first lines…
Oh shit…
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The band’s cover of ‘War Pigs’ is faster than the original, and they give it their own twist, making it heavier and grittier. After the (irritatingly brilliant) guitar solo Leather Jacket Band Guy even throws in a few lines from Deck The Halls, the audience going wild, and joining in enthusiastically when the ‘Oh Lord yeah’ is replaced with a ‘Fa-la-la’.
The rest of their set is a mix of covers and originals, all in a similar, heavy style, and as they finish to a rapturous throng you realise, flustered, that you couldn’t tear your eyes from the stage the whole time. Robin totally notices. You even let her get in a cheery, “Told ya so!”, as you reluctantly admit they weren’t completely terrible.
You spot the frontman (singer and guitarist, cue internal facepalm) jump down off the low stage, and you feel a little uneasy as you see him start heading in your direction.
You’re at peak embarrassment and can’t bear the thought of having to face him after what you said outside. You hadn’t even heard them play and you dissed the fuck out of them, him specifically. What makes it worse is that they were actually really good. The last thing you need is to have that thrown back in your face, in front of Robin, by their cocky lead guy.
Suddenly you want Spontaneous Human Combustion to be a real thing, turn you to ash so your only presence would be scuffed up on those heavy, unlaced combat boots, going unnoticed and carried out on everyone’s soles into the chilly night. But science and physics are apparently not willing to defy themselves for you this evening. Bastards.
Quickly, you get off your stool, mumbling something about needing the bathroom, and head off in a random direction, in your haste to escape not even asking where it is.
You chance a glance over one shoulder. Oh god, he’s heading straight for you…
As you stumble about in the crowd, you notice a free seat next to a guy at the bar. You hardly register that his coiffed hair and polo shirt don’t quite fit the vibe of the place, so desperate are you to build an alternative narrative that doesn’t involve the guy whose band you just dissed coming to talk to you. You’d said you were visiting a friend, he’s not to know it wasn’t a boyfriend, right? If he sees you with someone he’ll back off and leave you alone, right?? Surely he wouldn’t confront you with a potential Defending Your Honour™️ fight on the table. Right???
So, that’s the plan.
A really good, foolproof one? Um, no. But Band Guy is moving through the crowd, and you’ve gotta do something, fast.
You reach the bar.
“Hey, could you do me a favour real quick? A creepy guy’s been hitting on me, and I need to give him the message that I’m not interested. If I buy you a drink, will you act like you’re my boyfriend for, like, the next 30 seconds?”
He turns to you, and you notice his features. Golden skin, chiselled jaw, stunning hazel eyes, hair to rival the hottest supermodels’, a scattering of moles that look like constellations. Goddamn, he’s pretty. What is it with this bar? Is everyone inside it cute? Why have you never been to Hawkins before??
You give him a pleading look, and tentatively hold out one hand towards where his is resting on his thigh, hoping he’ll take it.
“Well, for a sweet thing like you, how could I say no to that tempting double offer?”
He smiles then, full and beaming, and you almost slip off your stool. A warm palm comes to cup over yours, and you manage to blurt out an order to the barman, saying, “Two of whatever he’s having.”
Just then, Band Guy reaches you. You do your best to swoon at Polo Shirt as your drinks get delivered, lifting yours and clinking it against his with a, “Hey, sweetheart, thanks for bringing me here”.
“Oh, I didn’t realise you were here with someone tonight.”
“Yeah, this is the friend I was telling you about. We’re spending the holidays together. Isn’t that right, sweets?”
Band Guy purses his lips, you hope in consternation, but it’s whatever, you just want him to leave you alone to stew in your mortification.
He backs up half a step, saying, “Well, I guess I’ll leave you to it then.”
Success!
Just as you think your devious plan has worked, Band Guy turns to Polo Shirt, slaps his open palm against his shoulder a couple of times, and saunters off, with a, “Nice to see you, Steve-o. Just checkin’ you're wanting a lift back in the van with the guys, like usual?”
Oh. Oh god. They know each other?!
He turns away, smirking back briefly in your direction to fling a casual, “I’ll see you around, Boots”, before continuing his path to the other end of the bar. You see him greet Flannel with a high five followed by a bro handshake, the latter making exaggerated air guitar movements and clearly congratulating him on a great performance.
If cringing caused bodily trauma you’d be in the ER by now, most likely on life support. What are the chances of embarrassing yourself all to hell in front of a cute guy you’ve only just met, twice in one night?
Also, wait, you totally didn’t just admit that you find him cute. Nope. No siree. Nah. Niet. Definitely not.
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Stupid Robin convinced you to take this stupid job in the stupid mall and now you’re stuck here smiling this stupid smile at all the stupid local kids in this stupid elf costume.
Stupid striped tights, stupid short skirt, stupid tight green tunic, stupid fluffy collar.
And yeah, okay, stupid self-induced hangover from stupid drinks last night thanks to stupid Robin’s stupid friends. Actually, they were all really nice, especially ‘Steve-o’ and the barman, Jonathon, neither of whom mentioned your embarrassing faux pas with Band Guy, which makes them total heroes in your book. Plus, Band Guy mercifully gave you a wide berth for the rest of the night by doing Band Stuff™️, so that was a win too.
At least the dress code for this gig stated ‘black footwear’, so you could wear your own boots. You’d never admit it out loud, but you think the combination of the red and white striped tights with your chunky, alternative boots actually looks kinda cute. It’s just as well, because you’d packed light (you and Robin joking that so long as you had your ”Pills and panties” you were good to go), and hadn’t brought any alternatives.
You’ve been at this for a couple of days already, beaming artificially at the kids as you try to corral them into some semblance of an organised line, and handing out stickers and treat bags for the ones who’ve seen Santa, putting your best singsong voice on as you ask for what feels like the millionth time, “So, what did you ask Santa for?”, and, “Have you been good this year?”
Your face has begun to ache with the effort of all the smiling, although the cheery mall Santa (a big, friendly guy called John? Jack?) takes up most of the slack, with a voice deep and gravelly enough to control even the worst-behaved little shits. You hope his day job uses it, it would be a shame for a voice like that to go to waste. He should probably be in sports, or acting, or law enforcement or something.
You can’t deny the money is coming in handy though. It’s reliably supporting your holiday booze habit, and you’ve even treated yourself to a couple of Christmas treats, some silver skull jewellery from a surprisingly well-stocked accessory shop, and something more, um, personal from the ‘specialist interest’ shop you’d found hidden away at the back of the mall’s upper level. The nice lady who worked there, Karen, even kindly offered to drop off your purchase at your staff locker later today.
You’re on the later shift, so Santa’s already here, and as you make your way out to the grotto area (which is essentially just a few old stage props surrounded by a few giant polystyrene candy canes; you surmise this might be one of the first years they’ve done this) you’re greeted by a predictable, “Ho ho ho!”. But today it’s a different voice than usual. Still deep, still booming, but not the one you’re used to.
As you round the glittery candy cane on the corner, the deep baritone gives way to a much higher, cheekier pitch.
“Ho, ho- hoooooly shiiit, I’d recognise those boots anywhere!”
Oh no… It can’t be…
“Heeey, Boots! I didn’t know you’d be one of my little helpers today!”
Even behind the fake beard you can see the smugness spread across his face.
You stop in your tracks, hands coming up to your face in a vain attempt to shield your embarrassed self from the impending, and, you’ll admit, completely justified, teasing.
Realising you can’t hide from it, you huff out a breath and amble over to him. He looks way too comfortable sitting on that ornate throne, like he’s used to such a position, somehow…
As you move closer you see that even beneath the tacky acrylic costuming, he still looks cute (damn him). He’s foregone the white wig and opted to display his own locks, chestnut curls cascading over his shoulders, and the white faux fur of his hat and beard create a subtle frame around his eyes. You observe their colour properly for the first time, and even in the harsh fluorescent lights of the mall they look like swirling pools of liquid cacao, and you don’t think you’ve ever seen anything quite like them before. They’re fixed on you as you walk to him.
You plonk down on a fabric-covered hay bale next to the throne. There’s no line of kids waiting as yet, and you’re relieved you can get this next part done without too much of an audience. Deep breath, pull off the bandaid, or whatever that stupid phrase is.
“Listen, about last night. I’m really sorry. I not only stole your smokes but also dissed your band before I’d even heard you, and that wasn’t cool. And that thing with Steve at the bar? God, you must think I’m such a loser. And, I know you probably couldn’t give two pebbly shits about what I think right now, but you guys are actually really good.”
He turns to you, looking down his nose and through his lashes at you.
“Hey, don’t sweat it, sweets. I did kinda bait you into that first part. And at the bar? That was… creative. I actually thought it was pretty funny.” Smirking, nodding and turning his face to the front again, he continues, “And for the record, we do play other places, not just this so-not-Seattle town.”
You risk a glance at him. The Santa suit is obviously too big for him, the collar wide enough to show off his pale throat for a moment before he turns back to you and the comically-fluffy beard obscures it again. You can see the outline of his taut, muscular thighs under the loose faux velvet of his pants, and his boots (those boots) are worn just like they were last night, unlaced at the top, casually stylish, the red fabric pooling around the calf and ankle. And to finish it off, there’s what appears to be a large throw cushion stuffed down his front.
It turns out he’s covering for (Jim!) Hopper, who’s apparently the local police chief (nailed it) and has been called out to check on some weird occurrences at an old research facility on the other side of town.
Band Guy Santa continues, sarcastically, “Pfft. Providing the town of Hawkins with security and safety instead of performing the frankly, essential, public service of dicking about in a Santa suit. Inconsiderate, right?”
“Yeah, totally”, you giggle.
“The organisers heard from Hop that I was somewhat… theatrical, so they asked me to fill in.”
You remember how theatrical he looked whilst on stage, and you feel your throat heat up, hoping he won’t notice you subtly pulling at your collar with a finger, or see the perspiration appearing on your décolletage.
“So, you may wreak your revenge now, sweetheart. I’m not exactly in a position to defend my sartorial choices right now, am I?”, he says as he gestures to himself, sweeping a palm up and down his garb. “Gimme your worst.”
You’d feel pretty bad if you laid into him now, not only considering your own current garb but especially with what you’d said last night outside the bar. However, he is giving you an opportunity to even the score for his manipulation, and it would be a shame not to take it. You decide upon a combination of cheekiness and diplomacy. (And not flirty. Definitely not flirty.)
“I dunno, that beard covers most of your face, which obviously does you some favours. But don’t do yourself down, you look… good in red.”
He swallows as you stand to move away from him, and you hardly realise that you’ve rendered him speechless, as you joke, poking at the obvious cushion by his middle,
“Although, I’m totally not buying this padding, you know,”
Suddenly a party of schoolchildren appears from nowhere, and before they get between you and you get too far away to hear, he stammers out, “Uh, I’m Eddie, by the way.”
You half-yell your own name back, adding with a smile,
“It’s nice to meet you. Have fun today, Santa.”
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It’s late afternoon and Santa Eddie is on his regulation break. You’re doing your best to herd the over-sugared, post-school crowd into some kind of order, when Mrs Santa (a lovely lady called Claudia) calls your name and says you can go on your break now too, if you want, and to please tell Santa that he needs to get back here and start doling out Christmas wishes.
You jump at the chance for even just a few minutes away from the diminutive hoards (though you could listen to Erica, one kid you do like, diss commercialism and the ethics of lying to kids en masse all afternoon), and make your way to the locker room.
Eddie’s still there, sitting on the central bench, beard pulled down under his chin, and he appears to be holding a package in his hands, though from the look on his face you don’t think it was one he was expecting. As you move closer and peer into the box, you spy the contents, and a bright red, glittery shape becomes visible.
Oh god, no. No-no-noooo…
It’s the order you placed from the shop at the back of the mall, but Karen’s obviously dropped it off next to the wrong locker - Eddie’s is number 69 and yours is 96.
It’s a dildo (of course it is). A Christmas-themed, flexible, long, thick, glittery, red dildo, with a gold lamé ribbon tied artfully around the base.
Eddie’s face is a picture of surprise as he turns to look up at you, eyes and mouth wide and eyebrows practically disappearing into his hairline. He’s holding the packaging, your name visible on the wrapping, nixing any hope you’d had of feigning innocence and pretending you knew nothing about it.
“Uh, I think this is yours. I’m so sorry. I-it was left by my locker and I opened it assuming it was for me, and then I saw your name on it, but by then it was too late…”
He sees you slump down into the bench a few feet away from him, face in your hands. You don’t know him well, but you decide to let him get whatever he wants to say out of his system rather than potentially make everything worse by trying to get him to shut the hell up.
His tone is mocking, but not exactly mean, as he continues,
“It’s a pretty one, really. Y’know, festive. I admire your choice of aesthetics and commitment to the season.
But you know, Boots, if you wanted to feel special inside this Christmas, all you had to do was ask.
Wait, do you also have an Easter-themed one? Is it a rabbit?”
He’s turned to face you now, far too pleased with himself for that final quip. Arrogant bastard.
The tears come in a wave, and you fold in on yourself, trying to hide your face even more. The heat in your cheeks feels about the same temperature as the colour of that fucking dildo.
“Hey, hey. I was only kidding.” He scootches closer to you on the bench. ”Look, there’s nothing wrong with it. Everyone deserves pleasure, it’s healthy. And I get it, Boots, it can be hard for girls to find a guy who actually knows what the fuck they’re doing. And, maybe you don’t even want or need a guy, you just want some special time by yourself, right?”
There’s a short pause, like he could be considering his next choice of words.
“And anyway, I actually think it’s kinda hot…”
This surprises you. You’ve never met any guy who didn’t take the presence of your toy collection as a personal insult.
You risk a glance in his direction, hoping your wet and stinging eyes don’t look as red as they feel. “You really think so?”
“Oh yeah”, he responds, crossing his legs as subtly as he can, shielding his lap. “The one you chose? It’s… sophisticated. The glitter gives it a real nice touch. And,” he drops his voice a little, continuing in an almost-whisper, “I’d love to see what you do with it.” He clears his throat and looks away, finding a convenient patch of plain wall to focus his gaze upon.
Confused, upset, and unable to fathom exactly what’s going on (is this just banter? Or is he flirting? Wait, does he like you??) you grab the box from him and move to stuff it in your locker. Trying to hide the crack in your voice, you call over your shoulder, “Claudia says your break’s over and to get your jolly ass back out there, pronto.”
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Oh shit… shitshitSHIT…
Stupid collar, stupid faux fur, stupid cheap zips! Goddammit!
You’re at your locker - the one that should’ve secretly contained your special Xmas gift to yourself - trying to get out of your stupid elf costume, but the zip won’t budge. The top of it is enmeshed amongst the stupid faux fur of your collar, and your frustrated, unsighted and fumbling ministrations appear to be making it worse.
You need help. An empathic soul to come to your aid and diligently untangle you from this costuming hell. But there’s only one other person here, and, even though your last encounter ended better than it could have, he’s still the last person you want to see right now.
Why tonight? Of all nights? How could this happen on the one night where the literal only person left in the entire fucking building is him??
You can only assume you’re on the real Santa’s shit list. Were you really that naughty this year?
Your brain rewards you with a brief, but telling, synopsis of your year so far: smoking blunts behind the library with Robin during study breaks, skinny dipping in a freezing lake on a dare, all that tequila, that brief foray in the back of a Camaro with that guy (Bobby? Billy?). Okay, you were no saint, but this? Come on…
Dejectedly, you drop your chin to your chest and let out a frustrated huff.
Looking miserable, and literally dragging your heels, you shuffle back out to the grotto, steeling yourself for whatever mocking banter Eddie will subject you to this time.
He’s leisurely rearranging the grotto area, and fiddling with the fairy lights behind.
“Hey, Boots. What’re you still doing here?”
Still not looking up, and flicking your eyes everywhere but in his direction, you mumble,
“I, uh, I need your help.”
“What is it? C’mon, you can tell me. We’re quite intimately acquainted now, wouldn’t you say?“
You can hear the smirk in his voice and you want to slap it right off his face. Your response comes out in a rush.
“MyzipisstuckandIcan’tgetoutofthisfuckingcostume, okay?”
“Well, honestly, if you want me to undress you, all you have to do is ask…”
There’s annoyance in your voice as you spit out, “For fuck’s sake Eddie, are you gonna help me or not?”
“Of course, Boots, I’m just messin’ with ya.” His voice drops to an almost-rumble as he instructs, “Turn around for me, yeah?”
His voice is commanding, yet soft and velvety. Parts of your brain turn to marshmallow, and you consider that you’d do almost anything he asked, if he asked you like that.
You do as he requests, your back facing him. You tilt your head down slightly, allowing him better access to the top of the zip, inadvertently also exposing the back of your neck.
He exhales (is it a bit shaky?), and you feel the heat of his breath on your nape, the sensation raising goosebumps along your spine and worrying your legs a little. It’s all you can do to not drop to your knees right there and then. You let out a tiny gasp and try to cover it with a deep swallow.
Eddie works gently on the collar of your garment, fiddling with the fur and disentangling what he can. As he works you continue to feel his breath on your neck, and you wonder if he has any idea what it’s doing to you.
Seemingly satisfied he won’t make it any worse than it already is, Eddie grasps the tag with his fingertips and places the palm of his other hand on your shoulder blade, the heat of it radiating through you so intensely that you have to scrunch your eyes closed and try to ground yourself.
With a quiet, “You ready?”, Eddie begins to slowly lower the zip.
It dislodges under his delicate touch, and although the zip is now completely free-moving he continues to pull it downwards ever so slowly. You feel another frisson of excitement, and even though you could at this stage probably quite easily take over and get out of the garment yourself, you don’t move away.
As the opening reaches your shoulder blades, you feel something else. It’s featherlight, barely there, but you think you can feel the knuckle of one of Eddie’s bent fingers brushing the skin of your back as he pulls the zipper slowly downwards.
Part of you thinks you should be freaked, after all an almost-complete stranger is touching you without your consent, but somehow it doesn’t feel weird. It feels… nice. Safe. Right.
The lower the zip goes the more of Eddie’s breath you feel on your back, and as the sides separate the edges of the colourful tattoo on your shoulder blade become visible.
Eddie's breath stutters at the sight, and as his knuckle passes over your bra strap and connects again with your lower spine you abruptly shake yourself out of your reverie.
Clutching the front of your tunic to your body, you move quickly away from him, stumbling back towards the locker room and mumbling, “I’ll take it from here. Thanks Eddie, you’re a lifesaver.”
Plonking yourself down on the bench in front of your open locker, you take a few deep breaths, trying to centre yourself before you get changed and wondering how on earth you’re going to be able to face him again tomorrow, the (yes, you’ll admit it now) hottest Santa you’ve ever seen...
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Back in your own clothes (black, wide-gauge fishnets, an old tee from a punk band that no longer exists, and a flared black skirt - much better) you’re about to scurry out with your head down when you hear muffled grunts and groans from the main floor. What on earth is going on out there?
You amble back out to the grotto area, trying to appear nonchalant and like this is your usual route out of the building.
You see Eddie’s combat boots sticking out from behind a pile of fake snowballs. They seem to be twitching.
You move closer until you can see his entire form. He’s lying on his back, immobile, completely tangled in fairy lights. You can’t help but start to giggle, not least because for the first time since meeting him it’s he who’s the one in a compromising position.
He’s struggling, likely making it worse, and he starts as he sees you, barking out, “Oh god, Boots, you scared me! Well, laugh it up, fuzzball, I guess it’s your turn to rag on me now.”
“What on earth happened? Are you hurt?”
“I said I’d help rearrange these lights, so I was up that ladder, moving them around, when the rung gave way. The lights were the only thing I could grab for when I span, fell, and, well, here we are!”
He gives you a broad but sarcastic grin, realising the absurdity of his predicament, trying to spread out his palms in a jazz hands kind of illustration but only managing to do it with one, the other trapped at his belt line by a string of dazzling pink lights.
“Um, you need a hand?”
“Uh, yes please.”
You take a moment to appraise the situation. You see the broken ladder, the tangled piles of lights, scuffed-up fake grass and unruly piles of snowballs.
As for Eddie, he seems unharmed, if a little bruised in the ego (and, perhaps, the elbows). He’s still wearing the Santa suit. Well, most of it. He still has on the hat for some reason, and the trousers, but he’s discarded the beard and jacket, presumably for reasons of temperature regulation or ease of movement, and his ‘belly’ cushion is nowhere to be seen.
And his top half? Well, his top half is now adorned only in a tight, white tank top.
You swallow as you take in his torso. He looked good on stage that night at the bar, but you never really got to see him this close up. Or this well lit.
His skin is almost as pale as the fake snow that litters the area, but there’s a creaminess to it that just makes him look, well, edible is the only word you can think of. Apart from ’lickable’. Yep, that would work too…
He’s solid, well defined, but he’s not stocky. You imagine that years of carrying amps and band equipment around has toned his muscles rather than bulked them.
And the tattoos… Oh. God.
You’ve always had a thing for people with alternative tastes, but this guy takes the cake. Swirling black ink in a variety of designs and styles covers his pecs and biceps, with smaller but no less elaborate designs adorning his forearms.
You notice a subtle glint under the colourful strings of lights that enwrap him, and spot that one of his nipples is pierced, the ring of metal just barely visible through the taut fabric.
Your eyes drift to his hands (those same hands that entranced you that first night), and although there’s no rings tonight (you guess ‘Badass Santa’ wasn’t the version on the mall’s wish list) his hands are no less attractive, still strong-looking and veiny, and you spot a number of small finger tats that you hadn’t been aware of before.
His position and the fact that he’s still struggling mean his abs are tensed, with his forearms are in front of him, making them, and his shoulders, really pop.
Jeezus.
Your thighs clench and you feel a heat bloom in your core.
He notices you staring, and for a moment seems to revel in it, but eventually breaks you out of your trance, asking, “You gonna help me get out of this, or what?”
“Yeah. Yeah, of course, um, lemme just…”
You decide to start at his feet, reasoning that’s where the tangles are the least bad, and at least if his feet are free he’ll be able to sit up.
That decision has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you’d like to see him sitting, bound, tied up for you, naked…
Shit. Fuck. Concentrate…
Eventually you free him from the majority of his confines, your fingertips and the backs of your hands brushing his skin and the fabric of his clothes occasionally. As he’s able to sit up, his hair tickles you as you work, his scent invades you all over again, and the two of you share glances and timid little chuckles as you move around him, both aware that you’re closer than you’ve been before.
Eventually he’s completely freed, and as he stands and steps out of the final loop of lights he flops exhaustedly backwards into his golden throne, eyeing the pile of entangled lights and running a hand over his face, mumbling, “Shit, there’s no hope for them tonight. I’ll deal with it all in the morning.”
You stand to the side of the throne, wanting to check he’s ok, and in a bold move that you weren’t expecting he lifts one arm and takes the tips of your first two fingers in his, gently raising your hand in a silent instruction to come closer.
Mirroring your earlier comment, he says, “Thanks, Boots. You’re a real lifesaver”, adding, with a hand against his forehead, “I would’ve been here all night, could’ve starved to death. They'd've found my mummified remains in the morning.”
You find yourself stepping towards him, and with your free hand try to give his pec a playful slap, murmuring, “You’re so dramatic. No, wait, theatrical!”
The slap fails though, as he rapidly brings his other hand up to the back of yours, trapping your palm against his chest. You can feel the heat of his skin, the slight sheen of sweat just noticeable as your fingertips breach the low neckline of his top, the heavy thud of his heartbeat.
You don’t realise how close you’ve become, and you gasp as your knees touch the side of his. He gently grabs the hand that’s on his chest and pulls it to his side, and to stop yourself from toppling forwards you have to step around him, ending up standing astride his legs.
Your eyes lock, and something changes. For a long moment neither of you move, and you feel your breathing rate speed up.
Not breaking eye contact, Eddie slowly moves your arm up to his shoulder, and you find yourself climbing onto the throne with him, straddling his thighs.
He breaks out that low, rumbling voice again, as he murmurs,
“That’s it, Boots, come sit on Santa’s lap.”
As you lower down onto him, you feel the heat of his thighs through your thin tights, and then the contrast of the chill of your metal-coated heels against the backs of yours.
You also feel something bloom in the pit of your stomach. And further down. A warmth, heat, need.
Eddie moves one hand to hold the back of your waist, pulling you gently, moving you further up his lap towards him.
You feel the unmistakable bulge of his arousal between your thighs, and as he moves you closer you gasp as you feel it nudge your mound.
You look at each other for another long moment, aware that this is very new territory. His eyes flick between your eyes and your lips, as he asks, quietly, “Is- is this okay?”
It’s all too much and simultaneously not enough. You definitely weren’t expecting any of this, but at the same time you find yourself desperately nodding, needing more of him, of Eddie.
You answer by slowly rolling your hips lightly against him, your lips parting slightly.
The few layers of fabric between you aren’t enough to dull the sensation of his cock pushing against your centre, and you feel it gradually pressing between your folds, your growing slick making the movements easier.
Suddenly, his bulge nudges your sensitive bud.
You gasp again at the sensation, making Eddie exhale a long low, warm breath over your torso, before he speaks again.
“Boots, can I kiss you?”
You take a breath, considering how this could all go. You could walk away now (albeit with shaky legs and damp thighs) and leave any possible awkwardness or complicated entanglement in favour of a simple, uncomplicated holiday with your friend.
But then you look into his eyes again, as his hips gently buck and nudge you once more, and your decision is made.
Breathing out, you reply,
“Fuck yeah, Santa.”
Wearing a soft, sly smile, he gently brings one hand to the back of your head, bringing you to him as he moves forwards, chocolate eyes roaming your face, scanning your eyes and lips.
Noses bumping and lips millimetres apart, he pauses for a moment before closing the gap, pressing his soft, plush lips to yours. They feel divine, soft and velvety, and this close you can smell everything him now, with the subtle addition of something faintly minty.
You kiss him back, and then you both press forward harder, parting your lips at the same moment, the tips of your tongues touching and dancing before sliding past each other and deepening the kiss, your teeth bumping gently and hot breaths mingling.
It’s wet, hot and needy, your hands grasping his shoulders, and his arms pulling you closer to him.
The rolling of your hips gradually becomes stronger and more forceful, and he bucks harder up into you. You need more. Breaking the kiss for air, you take a couple of lungfuls, toying with the drawstring on his red pants before asking, bold and more than a little cheeky,
“How are you feeling? Still entangled? Do you need a hand getting out of these, too?”
“Yeah, fuck, I’m feeling very… entrapped, kinda claustrophobic. Might be in shock from such a traumatic experience. I might need to loosen my clothing a bit, y’know, for medical reasons.”
You give him a smirk, and untie the cords. Raising up on your knees slightly, you slide your thumbs hands into the waistband of those and his fitted, black boxers (fuck, is there anything about this guy that isn’t sexy?). He quickly takes the hint, lifting his hips off of the throne and allowing you to move his garments down to his thighs.
As you work his member gets caught on the elastic of his boxers, and as it releases from the fabric it springs back onto his abdomen with an audible slap. You can’t help but look, and you’re not disappointed. It’s pleasantly, but not overly, big, thick and veiny, curved slightly and with a large flared head. The tip is shiny and pinky-red, and as you stare it twitches away from his body and a tiny bead of precum leaks from the tip. You’re surprised, but also delighted, to spot a shining pair of steel balls decorating a frenum piercing, and that there’s a few pretty dot and line work tattoos near the base.
It’s beautiful. You want to tell him so, but he grabs you and pulls you in for another deep, passionate kiss, his length trapped between your bodies, hot and pulsing.
You melt into the kiss, tongues slipping and sliding, lips rubbing, noses smooshed against each other and enjoying it for as long as you can both do without air.
Needing another deep inhale, and also wanting to get your hands on his delightful cock, you sit up again, slipping one hand between you and grasping at his length. Eddie hisses, then moans,
“Oh, Boots, you’re gonna fucking kill me.”
You enjoy the feeling of him in your hand for a few moments, relishing the heat and hardness, before you position the palm of your hand behind his cock and push your centre towards him again, trapping his length between your hand and belly.
More thrusts of his hips moves him between you, your slightly adjusted position now pressing him firmly between your clothed folds, his cock dragging the fabric across your clit. You can’t help but let out a high whine, and you feel his cock twitch again.
“Too much fabric. Wanna feel you.”
His voice is gruff, desperate, wanting.
You lean back a little, resting one hand on the arm of the throne, keeping your other hand wrapped around his cock. You’re not sure you ever want to let it go.
His hands move from your ass to your thighs, running over them and squeezing. When he reaches the part exposed by your lifted skirt he growls, feeling the skin of your hips and belly through the mesh of your tights.
Suddenly, his chin dips and he gives you an almost evil grin. His eyes remain connected with yours as the tip of his tongue peeks out of the corner of his mouth as he pushes some of his fingertips through the holes, grabs tightly and pulls.
You freeze as the sound of snapping fabric echoes around the grotto, cool air now gracing your belly and inner thighs. You gasp, not only at his actions but because you packed light and don’t have any other tights with you. But as Eddie’s thumbs trace up to the crease of your thighs, dangerously close to your heated core, all thoughts of packing and capsule wardrobes are erased. You want, no, need him to touch you.
With a smirk, you say, “Please touch me, Santa. I promise I’ve been such a good girl this year.”
His jaw goes slack and he looks at you in awe. You notice how black his eyes have become, the beautiful chocolate hues all but obscured.
He flicks his gaze to your core, black satin panties with lace edging fully on display. He runs one thumb pad up your very centre, feeling the smooth, silky fabric, your heat, the dampness that’s already apparent.
“Christ, baby, is this all for me?”
“All for you, Santa. I’m pretty sure you’ve been a bad boy this year, but you deserve a treat anyway.”
His eyes flick to yours again briefly, his lips curling into a lascivious smirk, before returning to the beautiful display between your legs. He hooks his thumb around one lace edge and, much more gently than he handled your tights, moves the soaked satin to one side.
With a tenderness and reverence that you’ve never experienced before, Eddie parts your folds with his thumb and runs it delicately from your wet lips all the way up to your clit. His eyes are fixed there, jaw slack, and you genuinely think he might drool.
As he connects with your sensitive bud you keen above him, eyes closing and head rolling back.
“That’s the spot, huh?”
You come back to look at him, and manage to breathe out, with a lilting giggle, “Fuck, yes.”
He moves his thumb in a small circle, and your mouth falls open in an O, your brows furrowing slightly.
“You want me to keep going, Boots? All you have to do is ask…”
You’re lost, gone, away in space, and you don’t have the capacity to chide him for his cheek. All you can manage is a breathy, “Please Eddie, please keep going.”
His thumb speeds up slightly and he gradually and gently increases the pressure, and you can feel the coil in your belly tightening already. Fuck, he’s good at this.
Your hand remains clamped around his dick, squeezing it occasionally, his hips rutting up into your fist at a leisurely pace as he watches you fall apart on his lap.
He moves his other hand from where it’s been resting on your hip, and, widening his thighs slightly to create space beneath you, brings the tips of his index and middle fingers to your hole. You’re sopping wet and swollen, lips almost sucking him in just from the slightest touch.
He looks to your face again as he asks, “Is this okay?”
You manage a rapid, shallow head nod and a, “M-hm”, and he slowly plunges two fingers into you, scissoring them and generating a low groan from you, which in turn causes a harsher snap from his hips.
“Jeezus, Boots, you make the most delicious sounds, wish I could record them, listen to them on a loop. Fucking hell.”
“Maybe you can, you’re a musician after a-all…”
That’s the last thing you can say for a while, the combination of Eddie’s smirk, his talented fingers pumping in and out of you, his glorious thumb movements, the feel of his cock in your hand and his hips bucking beneath you all conspire to bring you to your peak.
You grip the arm of the throne hard, nails denting the pile on the velvety fabric. Your eyes close and your vision goes black before becoming a thousand tiny fairy lights, a firework igniting in your core and spreading throughout your body in the most delicious waves as you spasm around Eddie’s fingers.
You don’t notice you’ve been groaning until your senses return, and you feel a slight roughness in your throat. Eddie continues his movements, though slower, and helps you ride out your aftershocks as you pant on his lap.
Only when you start to twitch in discomfort does he remove his thumb from your clit. He slowly pulls his fingers from inside you, and to your surprise brings them up to his lips, pushing them fully inside his mouth and sucking greedily, closing his eyes and humming at your taste. Popping them out with a wet smack, he says,
“My god, Boots. You taste better than sugar cookies and cotton candy combined.”
Your arms feel suddenly weak, and you flop forwards, forehead on Eddie’s collarbone. You feel his warm, broad palm on your back, rubbing gently, soothing you.
“Y’okay there, sweetheart?”
You manage a little squeak, and mumble a tiny, “Mmph, yeaaah…”, as he chuckles lightly.
After a few moments you sit up a little, gazing into Eddie’s blown chocolate eyes through an endorphin haze, and you notice your cheeks are tense, in what must be, given Eddie’s somewhat lovesick expression, a goofy smile.
You realise you’re still holding on to his dick, and give it an experimental squeeze, to test whether your muscles are responding to signals from your brain (yeah, that’s definitely the only reason…). Eddie’s hips buck up, and you sneak a look down to see more precum leaking from the tip. You gather some with your thumb, circling it gently over his slit.
Eddie inhales with a hiss. His strong arm around your back goes to pull you in for another kiss, as his other hand reaches up to the hat atop his head, pulling it off and discarding it amongst the tangled fairy lights.
You move towards him for a deep kiss, releasing the grip on his member and running your hands around his (surprisingly muscular and delicious) neck and into the hair at the base of his skull, tangling your fingers into the curls and tugging gently, earning you another moan.
Shifting your hips along his thighs, you press your soaking folds against Eddie’s turgid cock, and the combination of sensations causes Eddie to break the kiss and emit a loud, low groan. His arms tighten around your torso and he moves his warm mouth down your jaw and neck with wet kisses, then lightly bites the top of your shoulder.
You sigh, knowing what you want.
“You ever fuck an elf, Santa?”
Eddies still mouthing at your collarbone as he mutters into your warm skin,
“Goddammit, you’re incredible.”
You move backwards slightly and Eddie takes the opportunity to reach behind him, grabbing the back of his tank top and dragging it off, dropping it carelessly to the side of the throne to join the lights and his hat.
Fuck, his chest is glorious too.
Bringing a little of your lower lip between your teeth, you run your palms down his solid torso. You want the opportunity to play with that nipple ring and examine each and every one of his tattoos, but right now there are more pressing desires on your mind.
He lets out a shaky breath as you brush his abs with your fingertips, shift your position and line up his swollen head with your eagerly awaiting hole.
“You sure about this, Boots?”
You look up at him, at his blown dark eyes and pink, kiss-bitten, shiny lips, and quirk an eyebrow as you run your fingers into his hair and murmur, “Oh yeah, Eddie. I want you to make me feel… special inside.”
He gasps as you angle your hips and sink down, pushing the head of his cock inside of you, gradually taking his thick length.
He kisses your lips once more, humming, as you acclimatise to his girth, then grins lasciviously as he thrusts his hips upwards, filling you completely. You’re close enough that the moans you let out mingle together and your breaths become shared, eyes locked and mouths agape.
You roll your hips, sliding Eddie’s length in and out of you at a gentle pace. You can feel every ridge and vein as he enters and pulls out, and you’re sure you can feel his frenum piercing dragging against your walls.
You can tell he’s holding back, consciously stilling his own hips and allowing you to set the pace. But this doesn’t last long.
Voice gravelly and ragged with lust, Eddie mumbles,
“Shit, baby, I gotta move. I wanna fuck you so bad, Boots. You gonna let me fuck you?”
Mouth close to his ear, you breathe out a small, “Please”.
It’s all he needs.
Grabbing your ass and squeezing hard but not harshly, Eddie pulls you down onto him as he thrusts up from below. His pace is ruthless as he lifts and drops you, matching his rhythm as he grunts and mumbles incoherent curses. You can’t make out much, but you do hear,
“Fuck, baby, you feel so divine, taking me so well, Jeezus Christ.”
Fuck, he feels amazing.
You remember his cock tattoos, and imagine how they might look, shiny and covered with your slick, disappearing in and out of your glossy lips.
This image, combined with a particularly hard snap of Eddie’s hips causing him to angle slightly differently and start to nudge that special place inside of you, causes you to let out a loud gasp, and your mouth drops open as you try to form a sentence.
“Oh fuck Eddie, I’m- I’m…”
“You gonna cum all over Santa, pretty girl?”
He continues thrusting at that delicious angle and you feel your legs start to tremble.
“Fuck! Y-yes, ye-ess!”
Heat building in your core, you just about hear Eddie mumbling,
“Shit, you’re squeezin’ me so tight, I’m not gonna last much longer. Where do you want…?”
Before he can even finish you’re blurting out,
“Inside me Eddie, please.”
You bounce on Eddie’s lap as his thrusts become deeper, faster, and then harsher and less rhythmic. You grind down onto his pelvis, your clit rubbing against his pubic bone and his thick, dark pubic hair, as his cock continues to bully your most sensitive spot.
Suddenly your muscles tense, thighs clamping around him, your forehead pressing hard into his, as his hips slam up into you. You let out a low whine as you peak again, vision blackening, all your muscles tensing as your walls clench around him.
Eddie follows almost immediately, thrusting harshly upwards and pulling your hips down onto him, and you feel rushes of warmth as he groans and empties himself inside your fluttering cunt.
There’s quiet for a moment, and all you can hear is your panting breaths and the sound of your own heartbeat in your ears.
You sit in silence for a few minutes, foreheads feasting against each other, heartbeats slowing and breathing becoming more regular.
Breathlessly, and without full clarity, you sit up slightly and mumble “Fuck, Eddie, that was…”
Eddie chews a little on the inside of his lower lip, and with the widest, sexiest smile you’ve ever seen, replies softly,
“Merry Christmas, Boots.”
After a few moments spent pecking kisses on various parts of your face, making you giggle, Eddie eventually helps you to lift off his slowly softening cock. He leans over to retrieve his discarded tank top and uses it to help clean the mess you both made between your legs.
You unpeel yourselves from the golden throne, feeling sure the heels of your boots have left marks in your ass, and he aids your passage back to the locker room on wobbly legs, helping you wash and making sure you’re ok.
As you gather your things he changes into his street clothes. They’re not dissimilar to last night, though he’s foregone the chain belt and has chosen a somewhat more fully intact shirt, and he watches you as he slings on his leather jacket.
Almost ready, you look down forlornly at your gaping tights, the hole barely covered by the hem of your skirt. Eddie chuckles, and tries to lighten your hosiery-related mood.
“Perhaps I could buy you a new pair? Maybe at lunch tomorrow we could go visit your favourite shop, and you could pick out something nice?”
The image of Santa and one of his elves nonchalantly browsing the displays in a sex shop amuses you greatly, and you tell him so, but he insists he would totally do it, if you wanted to.
There’s a pause as you retrieve your coat and go to put it on, and as you do he adds,
“Well, I’d call it a Christmas gift, but… I’d actually prefer to get you something a little nicer. If you’re around. And you’d let me, of course.”
You’re surprised by Eddie’s unexpected tenderness, and the implication that he might want to continue… whateverthisis. You don’t want to presume anything, but there’s certainly a little tingle in your belly at the thought.
You reply, sardonically, “Sure, I guess. So long as it’s not red and glittery, I think I've had enough things like that to last me for a little while.”
You both snort-laugh at this.
As you start to walk together to the staff exit at the back of the mall, Eddie offers to take your bag so you can fasten your coat and put on your hat and gloves.
Trying to sound casual, he asks, “Sooo, how’re you gettin’ back to Robin’s?”
“I was gonna take the bus, like usual.”
Eddie looks at you sideways, slightly bashful.
“Could I, maybe, give you a ride? We can stop at Benny’s on the way, if you’re hungry. It's a diner”, he clarifies, remembering that you’re not from around here.
Your tummy flips, and not just from the thought of a milkshake and fries.
“Yeah, sure, I’d like that.”
Eddie smiles that wide smile again, and you see his cheeks turn a little pink. It’s odd, him being all shy and self-conscious after what you two have just done, but somehow it’s also incredibly endearing.
As he walks you through the parking lot, still carrying your bag and toying with a stray piece of tinsel that he found in his pocket, he says,
“Y’know, I’d still really like to see what you do with that Christmas dildo.”
Thinking back to how he looked all tangled up, you smirk back at him as you think of how you’d quite like a redo of him tied up for you.
As you reach his van, you lean against the passenger door and coyly look at him.
“Well, maybe I could show you. Could we, maybe, do something after work tomorrow?”
With the sweetest dimpled smile you think you’ve ever seen, Eddie cocks his head to one side and lifts a hand to run the tip of one forefinger along your jawline, as he replies in that low rumble,
“Oh, Boots, you should know by now. All you have to do is ask.”
🎄You may not yet be completely sold on the whole idea of The Holidays™️, but you’ll have to admit to Robin that this might well be the start of your Best. Christmas. Ever.🎄
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Thanks so much for reading! ILY 🥰
Please support your content creators by not only liking but also commenting and reblogging - it’s so important. If you liked this there’s a good chance others will too, and comments and reblogs are the only way posts get seen. Consider it a Christmas gift to your writers and followers 😍🎅🏼 Thank you, and Happy Holidays, however you celebrate!
Resources: Proof that Deck The Halls can be sung to the tune of War Pigs (and vice versa), plus the ‘Fa la la’ 😊🎄
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Text
Slow
Summary: A night out celebrating Miller Contracting finishing their first big contract on time with the next one around the corner, leaves you going home with Joel and Frank, spending a night with both men you would have never dreamed of.
Pairing: Joel Miller x fem. reader x Frank Castle
Wordcount: 3,864
Rating: E
Warnings: somewhat established relationships, unspecified age gap, alcohol, smut (oral m receiving, unprotected sex) mmf threesome, everyone is bi here, feelings, a little derogatory language, public fingering, no outbreak AU
A/N: this is something I did not know I needed 26 hours ago. Also only a little edited. This is just for fun. I also fucking hate writing threesomes so if you find mistakes, please don't tell me lol
follow @toomanystoriessolittletime-fics and turn on notifications to get notified when I post a new fic
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„So, come around here often?“ You tried not to roll your eyes, leaning with your side against the bar counter of the shady, yet cozy dive bar your boss had all invited you to to celebrate finishing the first big project on time and landing two new ones. 
You hadn’t worked that long for Miller Contracting Ltd. You hadn’t been living in Austin long in the first place. A shitty break up and a boss who did not know how to keep his hands to himself let you pack your few belongings and visit your best friend almost a year ago. It had been a five day road trip, but it had changed your life. 
Now you had your own apartment, a new car and a new job as…. The girl for well, everything that had to do with numbers at Miller Contracting. 
Your boss did not make a big secret out of his dislike for paperwork in your interview.
Which led you standing in one of your favourite summer dresses, waiting for the guy behind the bar to notice you so you could order the last round for the table. 
You tilted your head to the side, finding Tommy looking at you, his eyebrows wiggling playfully, a silly grin on his lips. Tommy Miller was the younger of the Miller brothers and definitely had a drink (or three) too much already.
„Not sure if your wife likes you flirting with other woman, Miller,“ you grinned and he chuckled. 
„Not flirting. Don’t need to. I have the hottest wife at home. Here to help you,“ he said. 
You smiled, loving how in love he was with his wife, their first baby on the way. 
The bar man finally approached and Tommy ordered another round, water for you, and began to talk to the man about the latest football match. Something you very much were not interested in. 
Taking this as your cue to go you turned away, walking slowly back to the table. It was already getting late, and most of the workers had already left for home. Only Frank and Joel, your boss, were left.
They seemed to be in a deep discussion, leaving you to admire them both as you walked back over to the table. 
Frank had joined the crew not too long ago. Moving from outer state, looking for a job he had shown up at the working site, ready to be put to work. He had politely asked to talk to whoever is in charge after he knocked at the trailer that had been set up at the construction site for you. 
If you appeared… flustered he did not comment on it, talking to Joel who had been in the trailer with you to… talk about the pay checks for the coming week. 
At least that’s what he told everyone the day before the checks were due. 
Yes you did talk about the checks for the first ten minutes. The remaining time, however much he had left, was spend with you bend over your desk and he railing you from behind until you were both more than satisfied. 
You hadn’t been looking for someone. Much less your boss. Not that you thought a man like Joel Miller could be interested in you. 
He was… the manliest man you had ever met, older than you by a couple years. A hardworking Single Dad of a adorable twelve year old named Sarah. 
He was tall, broad, the slightest of silver shining through this dark hair and beard.
Funny enough the first time you slept together was after you both were a little tipsy in just this bar, waking up in his bed with a pleasant soreness you had never felt before, leaving for an awkward breakfast at which you both decided that you had to try this again sober. 
Deciding pretty quickly that you both wanted to continue seeing each other, no strings attached after. 
You, because you were figuring out a way to let you believe a man like Joel Miller could be interested in you (and your body) and Joel because he didn’t know how to let someone in and let them see the real him. The man who was scared to fall in love, to let someone in. 
Even though he already was very much in love with you. 
Not that you would know. 
You smiled at Frank as he looked up, sitting down next to Joel. Not too close, not too far. Even though part of you wanted to lean against his side and play with his hand that was resting on the bench next to you. 
„Whatcha talking about?“ You asked. They both looked at each other, before looking back at you.
„Hockey,“ both said in union and you nodded slowly, suspicious. 
„Doesn’t sound like a lie at all,“ you nodded and they both laughed. You looked at Joel, finding him hiding a smile as he looked at you for a moment before he looked back at Frank. 
Frank brought the bottle of his beer to his lips, taking the last sip, before he leaned back against the bench, watching both you and Joel with a amused smile.
You could admit that Frank was fucking hot. 
There was something dark about him, that made him even more attractive. And yeah when he was at the construction site and was working shirtless you always found a reason to spend a little bit more time outside. 
Something even Joel had noticed, hissing against your ear as he fucked you hard, asking if you wanted Frank instead of him. 
You only realised after that Joel had been jealous, finding him working shirtless only a couple days after, winking at you as he found your eyes.
Tommy stumbled against the table with the drinks. 
„My very beautiful wife is waiting outside for me. Be good. Don’t do something I wouldn’t do,“ he grinned and waved before he turned around and walked towards the door. You shook your head, laughing to yourself. 
„It’s adorable how much he loves his wife,“ you said, grabbing the glass of water and pushing the bottles of beer to Frank and Joel. 
„Never seen him like that ever before,“ Joel admitted.
„It’s a fucking miracle to find your person in this fucked up world,“ Frank said and you nodded. 
„Cheers to that,“ Joel said, raising his bottle, clinking it with his. You raised your glass too, cheering towards Frank, almost jumping in your seat as you felt Joel’s hand come up to rest on your thigh. You turned your head towards him and he clinked his bottle against your glass, giving you a small smirk, before drinking. 
You gulped before taking a sip of water. 
You had switched to water after your second beer, having drive here from home. Sarah was staying with a friend so Joel had invited you to stay the night and you were looking forward to tipsy Joel having his way with you. 
„So how long have you two been fucking?“ You head Frank ask and you chocked on your water, turning your head towards the man sitting across from you. 
He had his arms crossed, long at both you and Joel with an amused smiled. 
Frowning you looked at him, trying to come up with a lie you could tell him when Joel opened his mouth. 
„Better part of a year,“ he said and your mouth parted, shocked.
You two never had the discussion about telling anyone when you both still weren’t sure what this was or could become. Not that anyone ever had noticed until now.
Joel looked at you with a warm smile. He squeezed your thigh and you found yourself smiling back, warmth washing over at his admission. He did not even think about lying and it felt so fucking good to have a man not wanting to hide you like a dirty little secret. 
Even though you had been sneaking around for a year, but this was different. 
„Lucky bastard,“ Frank said and your eyes snapped from Joel to him. 
He laughed at your expression. 
„Don’t look at me like that. You’re fucking beautiful,“ he said, his eyes fixed on you. 
„She is,“ Joel said and you felt hot all of the sudden. His fingers pushed your dress up, his hand slipping between your legs and you bit your lip, your eyes still on Frank. 
„I’ve seen you watching me, girl,“ he said and you parted your lips, your chest rising as your breathing got faster. Joel’s hand kept wandering up your thigh, your legs parting for him unconsciously. 
„I haven’t…“ you began to lie, but Joel clicked his tongue. 
„Don’t lie to him, darlin’,“ he hummed, his hand between your legs pulling you closer towards him and you gasped. 
„Yeah, don’t lie to me darlin’,“ Frank repeated with a small smirk. 
„What… What is happening?“ You asked, lust clouding your mind, your panties wet as Joel fingers finally found their way to them. 
He hummed, his head bending down, his forehead resting against the side of your head. 
„Frank here had an idea to celebrate the good work you do,“ he said. 
„The work I do?“ You asked. 
„You’re the brain, we the muscle baby,“ Joel said and you gasped as his fingers pushed underneath your panties. 
„You… you did not talk about hockey while I went to get drinks,“ you said.
„No,“ Joel said.
„Joel…“ you whispered. 
„Tonight is about making you feel good. However you want,“ Frank said and you looked at him as Joel slowly pushed one of his fingers inside of you. 
You moaned quietly, your eyes slipping closed. 
„You want Frank and me to fuck you, baby?“ Joel hummed against your ear. Your eyes opened, looking at Frank who was looking at you with a raised eyebrow, waiting for your answer. 
You looked at Joel, his fingers slowly fucking into you. 
You wanted to ask him, where this idea came from. If he was certain. If he was really suggesting what you thought he was. As if he could read your mind he leaned close against your ear, whispering a quiet it’s okay. 
Flooded with confidence you turned your head, pressing your lips against his. 
„I’m taking you both home,“ you said, watching both men smirk. 
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You were drunk on the power you felt as two of the hottest men you had ever laid eyes on sat on Joel’s bed, looking up at you. 
You had driven to Joel’s place with him in the car with you, Frank following behind. 
On the way Joel assured you that you were in charge to which you told him you didn’t want to be. You wanted them to fucking wreck you.
So he made you repeat the rules. 
Green for keep going. 
Yellow for slow down. 
Red for stop. 
You had never used anything than green with him before, and you did not plan on doing differently today. You trusted Frank. And you trusted Joel to keep you safe, no matter what. 
He told you to strip down for them as soon as you entered the bedroom, which left you here, slowly pushing your dress from your shoulders, swinging your hips with a shy smile as you let the fabric fall to the floor, leaving you in nothing but white laced lingerie you had worn for Joel. 
He had told you he loved you in white a while ago.
„Slower,“ Joel said, his hand palming his cock, still hidden inside his jeans. Your eyes moved from him to Frank you had his bottom lip between his teeth and one hand inside his pants. 
„Think about all the times you watched Frank work in the heat outside. Give him a little show, sweetheart,“ Joel hummed and you shuddered.
You turned away from them, taking a deep breath. You let your hands wander up an down your sides, your fingers playing with the straps of your bra, looking over you shoulder at both of them. 
Slowly up pushed the straps down before you unclasped your bra in the front, turning around, your hands covering your tits.
You found Frank’s eyes as you let your bra slip from your arms, revealing your bare tits to him for the first time. He hummed, his eyes burning as they raked over every inch of naked skin revealed to him. 
You hadn’t noticed Joel taking his cock out, his hand wrapped around his cock, slowly pumping it. 
„Go on,“ Frank nodded, a smile playing on the corner of his lips. 
„I think it would be only be fair if you get rid of some clothes to, Gentlemen,“ you said. 
„That so?“ Joel asked and you nodded. 
He looked at you, amusement in his eyes. 
„You heard the lady, Castle. Show her those abs,“ he said and you couldn’t stop your giggle at seeing Frank roll his eyes. 
Both of them took their shirts off at the same time and you couldn’t help yourself as you walked over, bringing one of your hands up to each of their broad chests. 
You sighed when you felt Joel’s hand hook into your panties, pulling them down your legs as Frank leaned in, kissing your tits.
„How about you get down on those pretty knees and suck Frank’s cock,“ Joel said and you looked down to his cock, biting your lip. He got up from the bed, his fingers tilting your chin up, his lips finding yours in a sloppy kiss.
„Show him how good your mouth is,“ he whispered and you nodded, looking back at Frank who had pulled down his pants in the meantime, his cock hard and leaking against his tummy. 
Slowly you lowered to your knees between his legs. His hand came to cup your cheek as you looked up at him, his thump pushing inside your mouth. You closed your lips around it, flicking your tongue over it. 
He smirked. 
„Imagined those lips around my cock so many times,“ he said, pulling his thumb out. 
„Yeah?“ You asked, your hand carefully wrapping around his cock. 
He hissed, his jaw clenching while he nodded. 
„Let me know if I live up to your Imagination,“ you said, your lips kissing the tip of his cock, humming as you licked your lips, tasting his precum. 
„Fuck me,“ he groaned and you grinned as you parted your lips to suck on the tip of his cock. 
Hallowing your cheeks you slowly took him deeper, humming at his taste. He was a bit thicker than Joel, maybe an inch or so smaller. Relaxing your jaw you took him deeper, bobbing your head slowly as you sucked him off. Your hands resting on his thighs, digging into his skin. 
The noises he made were downright sinful, your pussy clenching around nothing. 
His hand came to rest on the back of your head, his fingers pulling your hair a little. 
„You can fuck her mouth. She loves it,“ Joel said from behind you and you moaned. 
„That so?“ Frank asked and you blinked your eyes, nodding with his cock in your mouth, humming around it. 
You felt Joel’s hand on the back of your neck and you looked up finding him hovering over you. 
„Come on, show him how much of a little cock slut you are,“ he said and you moaned, taking Frank’s cock deeper until your nose hit his pubic hair. 
You looked up at him, keeping him down your throat and he cursed before he began to fuck your mouth. Slowly at first, then getting rougher, the wet slurping of him fucking your mouth filling the room. 
„Fuck. You are good at that,“ he moaned, pulling out of your mouth. You smiled up at him, licking your lips. He got up to stand, pulling you up with him, kissing you hard. You moaned against his lips as you felt Joel on your back, kissing up your shoulder. 
Feeling four hands on you was a strange sensation. Someone was holding your tits in his hands, while other hands squeezed your ass. Frank’s tongue slipped into your mouth and you let yourself relax against Joel’s strong chest. 
„You can fuck her. But don’t cum inside of her,“ Joel hummed against your skin, kissing up your neck. 
You loved when he got a little possessive.
Frank parted from your lips, one of his hands holding your face as he looked at you, dark eyes fixed on yours. Joel’s hand slipped between your legs, his fingers playing with your clit. 
„Want me to fuck you?“ Frank asked. You nodded, pecking his lips. You turned your head to the side, Joel’s lips finding yours before you watched him kiss Frank, your pussy clenched at watching them kiss.
„Get on the bed. On your back. Wanna look at you when I make you cum,“ Frank rasped and you nodded. He took a step back and you got on the bed, flooded with confidence you spread your legs, laughing when he crawled over to you, kissing your lips. You felt the bed dip on your side and then there was Joel. 
His warm body against your side. 
Frank’s hands were on your thighs, pushing them apart as he kissed down your body. His lips closing around your nipple. 
„So fucking perfect. You’re a lucky bastard Miller,“ he said, flicking his tongue over your nipple. 
Instead of answering Joel leaned in and kissed you, humming against your lips. He deepened the kiss, his hand squeezing one of your tits. 
You felt Frank line up between your folds, the head of his cock slipping through your slick.
„She’s fucking soaked,“ he groaned and you sucked Joel’s lip between your lips as he parted from you. 
Frank rolled you to your side, so you were laying with him against your chest, one of his arms pulling you against him, and Joel behind you. You felt Joel’s hand on your stomach, his lips against your shoulder. 
Frank wrapped your leg above his, his cock between your legs.
„Want me to fuck you now?“ Frank asked, kissing you softly. 
„Please,“ you whimpered and he chuckled. 
„I got you,“ he cooed, parting your legs a little wider to make space for him, slowly sinking into your heat. 
You felt every inch of him, letting your head slowly fall back against Joel’s.
„Shit you’re so fucking wet. So warm,“ Frank groaned, slowly fucking into you. 
You moaned, closing your eyes. You felt Joel’s hand play with your tits and you reached behind, wanting to touch him. Opening your eyes you looked down and behind, finding Frank’s hand wrapped around Joel’s cock, slowly pumping his length all while he fucked you. 
„Fuck you’re both so hot,“ you whimpered and they chuckled. 
„You’re fucking breathtaking, baby,“ Joel hummed behind you and you whimpered. 
Frank began to fuck you harder, his thrusts hitting that spot inside of you, that made your whole body shake. 
„Oh, she’s close,“ Joel hummed and you felt his hand sneak between your legs, finding your clit, beginning to circle it. Frank’s hand was now on your hip, moving you against him. 
„Make her cum, Castle,“ Joel snarled. You reached your arm back, your fingers pushing into Joel’s hair, your fingernails scratching over his scalp. He kissed the side of your head, pinched your nipple and with the way Frank was fucking into you it was only seconds before you exploded, your orgasm making you cry out loudly.
„Fuck… Fuck,“ you heard Frank curse before he pulled out of you. Looking down you saw him jerking himself off before ropes of cum hit your stomach. You where still shaking from your orgasm when you felt Joel line himself up behind you and thrust into your still fluttering pussy. 
Your eyes closed, whimpering as Joel fucked into you hard and fast. 
„Always so fucking good for me,“ he groaned behind you and you moaned. Lips were on yours and you opened your eyes to find Frank kissing you. His hand now replacing Joel’s on your clit. 
„You gonna cum for him again?“ Frank rasped. 
„I can’t….“ You whimpered. 
„You can. Cum for me. Cum for me and I’ll fill this little pussy up. Just the way you like it, baby….“ Joel moaned behind you. 
„Fuck,“ you moaned.
Within minutes (or seconds or hours you weren’t sure anymore) you were coming again, clenching Joel’s cock so hard he chocked on a groan, fucking into you a couple more times until he twitched inside of you and filled you with his cum. 
„Oh fuck,“ you felt his forehead rest against the back of your head. 
„Oh fuck indeed,“ Frank said and you looked at him. 
You were a sweaty tangled mess of limbs and you could not remember the last time you felt so… satisfied. 
Still trying to fill your lungs with air you hissed when Joel slowly pulled out of you, feeling his cum dripping out of you. 
Humming, your eyes closed you snuggled into Joel’s chest, his arms around you and Frank hugging you both. 
You opened your eyes when you felt Frank move, giving you a shit eating grin as he slipped down the mattress, his face coming between your legs. You shuddered when you felt his tongue licking your pussy, cleaning you softly, humming like it was the most delicious meal. 
He pressed a kiss on your hip when he was finished, coming up to pull you close, leaning over your head to kiss Joel and then you. 
„That was….“ You began, trying to find words. 
„Should have done that sooner,“ Joel said and you chuckled. 
„Didn’t know that was an option,“ Frank said and you agreed. 
„Whatever my girl wants, she gets,“ Joel said, kissing your shoulder. 
You must have dozed of at some point, waking up cuddled against Joel’s chest, sheets covering your body. 
He was watching you. Joel had cleaned you up when Frank had said goodbye, not without telling him that it was time to get his head our of his ass and make things official with you. 
„Where’s Frank?“ You asked sleepily. 
„Left an hour ago. Told me to let you sleep,“ he whispered. 
You pouted. 
„Feel like I should have thanked him,“ you said and Joel chuckled. 
„You’ll see him next week. Bring him a fruit basked,“ he kissed your forehead. And you playfully slapped his chest. 
„Didn’t know you liked men too,“ you smiled. 
„What can I say? I’m full of surprises,“ he teased.
„Yes, yes you are,“ you sighed, kissing his chest. 
„Everything okay between us?“ You asked, half asleep. 
„Better than okay,“ he whispered just before you drifted back to sleep. 
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A week later you were sitting at your desk in the trailer when the door opened and Joel walked in. He locked the door behind him and you grinned as he walked over. 
„Wanna have dinner with me tonight?“ He asked, as he walked over to you. 
„Like a date?“
„Like a date,“ he nodded, his hands coming to rest on your desk as he leaned towards you. 
„I’d like that,“ you whispered. 
„Great,“ he hummed, leaning down to kiss you softly. 
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celestial-depths · 3 months
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Poor Things and Born Sexy Yesterday
(spoilers for Poor Things)
I stumbled on a discussion on whether Bella Baxter from the movie Poor Things (2023) is a representation of the Born Sexy Yesterday trope coined by video essayist Pop Culture Detective, who defines it as a mostly fantasy and sci-fi adjacent trope of a regular human man falling in love with a beautiful, otherworldly woman who, through some plot quirk or another, has no knowledge of social norms and no sexual or romantic past. Even though he is brutally average, he is able to win her love simply because he is the first (human) man she connects with and thus everything that's basic about him is impressive to her. Some examples of the trope given by Pop Culture Detective in his video essay are Leeloo from Fifth Element (the physically grown yet mentally child-like alien creature who falls in love with a taxi driver in a wifebeater) and Madison from Splash (a clothes-aversive mermaid who thinks that Tom Hanks is the most enchanting man in the world). I love Pop Culture Detective's work, and the Born Sexy Yesterday video essay was a cultural reset in my personal history. I saw the video when it premiered six years ago, but it has never fully left my mind, so of course I immediately thought of it when I saw Poor Things a couple of weeks ago. The movie certainly touches on the same themes that the Born Sexy Yesterday is made of. However, I think that the movie is an intentional subversion and a satire of the trope rather than a sincere execution of it.
The main character of the movie Bella Baxter starts out as a grotesquely literal version of the trope, as she is literally a newborn in the shape of a conventionally attractive woman who is being actively shielded from the influence of the outside world. She has the brain of a baby salvaged from the fresh corpse of a deceased pregnant woman, planted inside the skull of the reanimated body of the aforementioned woman as an experiment done by the unorthodox doctor Godwin Baxter. He keeps her locked inside his house and controls every aspect of her life, so when he invites the young doctor Max McCandles to join his research, McCandles is served what is essentially the perfect Born Sexy Yesterday experience: an exclusive access to a beautiful and naive young woman who is in a prime position of being groomed into whatever her keepers wish her to become.
Or so they would think.
A sincere Born Sexy Yesterday would be fully fascinated by this power dynamic and probably leave her here to be romanced by McCandles for the rest of the film. The audience would be expected to assume McCandles's perspective and indulge in the fantasy of falling in love with the untainted woman who has neither the life experience nor the critical thinking skills needed to question him.
But, fortunately, the movie doesn't remain here. After the first act, the movie switches its point of view from McCandles to Bella and starts putting her experiences to the forefront. She starts developing interests that absolutely do not align with the wants and needs of the men around her, and she begins to learn things that clash with the essence of the Born Sexy Yesterday trope. Soon, she has grown into a headstrong, independent, sexually experienced, intellectually curious woman who had zero interest in entertaining the whims of men and who intends to live fully for herself and herself alone: an absolute antithesis of the clueless and subservient blank slate the trope would require her to be. My reading of the film is that it's an intentional satire and an autopsy of the BSY trope and the gender politics that gave birth to it. It criticizes the men who entertain fantasies like it by making them look like absolute losers, urging us to ponder on what the hell is wrong with these creeps who see nothing wrong with drooling over a woman who is mentally a toddler instead of their intellectual equal.
The movie also reads as a critique of how women are socialized into a patriarchy. Godwin treats Bella just like a possession of his. Her body and her life are completely under his control from the moment she is "born" (another act in which neither Bella nor the woman she was born from had any say in), which isn't dissimilar to how a lot of fathers view their daughters. He wishes to keep her under constant supervision until the end of her life, until she protests and gets him to change his mind. When he asks McCandles to marry her, the two men treat the proposed marriage as a contract between the two of them rather than as a contract between McCandles and Bella herself. Again, this isn't too different to what marriage between men and women has meant throughout history.
McCandles is romantically interested in Bella even though he is fully aware of the fact that she is mentally a child. He seems to be looking forward to starting a sexual relationship with her after they are wed, as if the seal of marriage would make the intellectual disparity between them any less iffy. This bears resemblance to the way men in the real world prey on young girls with little to no sexual experience and whose brains are not fully developed because they're easier to control than grown women. I don't think that McCandles's hypocrisy is lost on the film. He agrees to marry Bella almost in the same breath as expressing his desire to keep her safe from other men, as if his desire to bed a person who is intellectually at the level of a five-year-old was any better than theirs.
When Bella chooses to leave Godwin's house to explore the world, the two men immediately replace her with a new experiment, showing that they were never truly interested in her as a person. They wanted the eternal baby, the thing that they can cage and control, and not the person who can think and learn and disagree with them. This exemplifies how disposable women are when they no longer serve their limited purpose in a patriarchy, and how replaceable people are when they are primarily viewed as bodies to be used. (Sidenote: I do think that Godwin and McCandles eventually learn to appreciate Bella for the person she is and that they both grow to be better people by the end of the film, but I still attest that these two are total creeps at least by this point of the movie.)
And then there's the supreme loser of the movie: the sleazy lawyer Wedderburn, who slithers into Bella's life and convinces her to run away with him. He is the darkest example of the kind of person who is drawn to inexperienced women like the ones represented in BSY movies - a predator who finds pleasure in the prospect of getting to corrupt and consume an innocent. He intends to take advantage of Bella and abandon her once he's gotten his fill only to find himself choking on his prey, who turns out not to be the malleable, naive creature he thought her to be.
This is the point where I think the movie goes from simply critiquing the BSY trope and everything it represents to successfully subverting it. The characters who embody the BSY trope don't really evolve. The movies they appear in are not really interested in their inner worlds and individual experiences beyond whatever serves the interests of the male protagonists. These characters are projections of male fantasies, so there really isn't a way for them to exist without centering men. This is not the case with Bella, who quickly grows into her own woman who is only tangentially interested in the men around her.
The bright side of Bella's condition is that she isn't just unaware of the ways of the world, but that she's also unaffected by the years of patriarchal conditioning that most normal women are burdened with. She literally has no shame, no internalized misogyny, no history of crushing blows to her sense of self-worth, and no looming knowledge of societal norms society. She has skipped the part in life where she is constantly bombarded with demands to make herself smaller and more palatable, to hate herself, to think of her body and the way it finds pleasure as something disgusting and abnormal, to treat other women as competition, and to think of herself as so much less important than men that she must pursue their validation beyond all else. Because of this blessed defect, she is free in a very rare way.
Wedderburn absolutely cannot handle that. When Bella first gets to know him, he paints a flattering picture of himself as a proud social deviant who gleefully eschews the rules of polite society. However, when faced with the actually deviant Bella, who flatly refuses to obey and center him, Wedderburn is revealed to be a phony. He is not a genuine libertine. He does not want to live in a truly free world with a free spirit like Bella, because he is a pathetic, insecure little man who only likes women in scenarios where the power balance is stacked against them. In my opinion, this is a direct shot fired at the BSY trope and its average enjoyers: if your ideal woman is someone who is many steps behind you in terms of mental capacity and experience, you are quite pitiful and would not stand a chance in an equal playing field.
It's hilarious how Wedderburn loses his mind when Bella starts exhibiting the kind of behavior he himself has proudly displayed earlier in the film: having multiple sexual partners, keeping sex and feelings separate, not falling in love with him or treating him like he's special, dropping him once she's had enough of him, and generally living life in an unconventional way. Again, the movie is pointing out the hypocrisy in men who fetishize inexperienced women while bragging about their own sexual conquests.
The part in the movie where Bella becomes a sex worker delivers the final blow to whatever is left of the BSY trope in her story, because the trope relies on sexual exclusivity and the fetishization of virginity. By having many partners and gaining lots of sexual experience out of her own free will, Bella stops fitting the ideal of the untouched woman who can be deflowered and exclusively possessed by the male protagonist. Also, through the conversations between Bella and the other sex workers, the movie finds another way to address the politics behind certain men's sexual fantasies of women - such as pointing out that some men enjoy sex with women more the less the women themselves enjoy it. It's a stray observation that the movie doesn't get deep into, but it has its place in the tapestry of the general theme of what desire reveals about people.
Finally, there's Alfie, who gives Bella (and us) an idea of the kind of life Bella's "mother" lived - as well as the kind of life Bella herself might be living had she grown up the normal way. It seems hellish. She'd be living under the tyranny of her awful husband, under a constant threat of violence, under absolute bodily control. Alfie wants to impregnate her against her will and to mutilate her genitals to deprive her of pleasure, and there's nothing that she could do about it because he is her husband and thus legally allowed to lord over her. She sees a terrifying glimpse of the role even privileged women like her have in this world: objects who exist solely for the pleasure of the men who own them. I would venture to say that the same description lies in the underbelly of the BSY trope.
I am happy that the movie doesn't take its sweet time to revel in the horror of this part of the story like so many other movies that address the oppression of women do. Instead, Bella stays with Alfie just enough time to say a hard and a well-informed no to his bullshit before getting on her merry way.
I think Poor Things is such a great example of taking a trope and exploring its implications in a way that goes beyond just pointing it out or parodying it by simply repeating it.
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jakekiszkasmommy · 6 months
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The Professor Part 1 📖
Warnings: 18+, this chapter is the lead up, drinking, kissing, a little nipple play, a TEENSY bit of dirty talking, future chapters will be FILTHY
Author's note: I have been wanting to write this before NYC. I am trying out something new and sort of combining Jake and Oliver into one character for this (Jake but with Oliver's accent???). Inspiration from Grey's Anatomy/PLL I guess 🤷‍♀️ you get the drift. This one, is for Jayda and Emily! I hope you all enjoy this new SERIES!
Part 1
............
You find yourself tucked away in the far corner a bar, observing people coming in while you swirl your drink with the tiny straw. The night was just starting, only a few small groups littering the tables.
It's dim, lit only by a few stage lights and the neons up by the bar. A man with medium brown hair takes the stage. Approaching the stool, he slightly pulls the material on his thigh a little higher before sitting, allowing his thigh to have more room. He is dressed in a cream colored suit with a mostly unbuttoned undershirt. An interesting outfit choice to play music in if you had to choose. He picks up the acoustic on the stand next to him and plucks a few strings before starting to play.
You perk up and sit a little taller with interest. Surely he can't see you all the way back here anyways. You couldn't quite place his age: the hair on his face making him seem older.
Leaning forward on your table, you prop your chin in your hand. The way he plays is beautiful. As you sip your drink, you stop dead in your tracks, your lips are wrapped around the straw as you catch his eyes staring right at you. Surely that couldn't be, he is just looking towards that portion of the room. But only one couple occupies a table there. Too wrapped up in their own world to have his attention. A smirk plays on his lips as he starts to sing. A low raspiness that you couldn't quite place rolls from him. The song picks up speed and he starts singing louder, more confidently.
Your slightly oversized, cropped sweater slips down one shoulder as you motion to your waitress for another drink. You pull out your phone, wondering if your friends were on their way yet. You were always the first to arrive to claim the booth in the corner. You were starting your last year of graduate school and classes started in 2 days. Tonight was the night to celebrate!
.....
Your friends roll through the door and find their way to you, all ordering a round of drinks to catch up with you. The later hour has attracted quite the crowd by now. More tables filling up. The man on stage ditches his acoustic for a cherry red electric but you haven't noticed yet.
You are wrapped up in a conversation, reminiscing on your favorite memories from the last few years. A louder chord rings through the bar and you snap your head up to the stage. It's almost if he knew you weren't paying attention. He does it again, this time looking your direction. Seeing him work a pedal on the floor with his black boot has you melting.
Your friend group has decdided to migrate to the bar. He watches as you weave through the crowd of people. You all find a spot at the bar and order another round of drinks as you listen to the music and continue on with celebrating.
.....
You all are a few rounds of shots deep when the man on stage finishes and thanks the crowd before another band takes his place. The friend next to you turns to have another discussion with another one of the guys in your group. You turn to your right only to see the handsome man that was on stage moments ago planted next to you, waiting for the bartender. You nearly do a double take looking at his side profile, subglasses perched on his nose even though he was indoors.
Feeling a little flustered, you turn back to your drink that is nothing more than a little bit of amber liquid diluted by melted ice. The musician waves to the bartender and you finally get to hear his sultry voice as he orders himself a beer and one of whatever you were having.
Your eyes deceive you, going wide as you try to find the words, "Oh no, you don't have to do that."
The bartender slides both of the drinks your way and he picks his up before turning on his heel to head in the oppisite direction. "Of course I do. You seemed to be my biggest fan tonight," he says and with that, you are left staring at the glass in front of you.
Fuck it. You pick up the glass and mention to your friends that you were going to go talk to someone. You squeeze through people until you emerge on the other side and find him tucked along a dark wall in the back, foot propped up against the wall.
He watches you through the dark lenses. Eyes raking over your legs in your tight jeans. They stop at your waist, drinking in the exposed skin. You take a few more steps towards him. He reaches out his hand to introduce himself, "I'm Jacob." A slight accent playing on his lips as he smiles.
You grab his hand firmly, "Y/n," you reply sweetly. "Thank you for the drink. You had a great set." You blush unsure of what you were even going to say to him.
You move to lean against the wall next to him. He removes his sunglasses and tucks them into his jacket pocket before turning towards you as he takes a drink. "Thank you, I've been playing since I was a kid."
He looks to be about the same age as you, maybe a year or two older. "I actually play a little myself too. Nothing like you! Can only play a few songs," you trail off.
.....
A majority of the night is spent tucked away in the corner with him. Talking, inching closer to one another. More drinks are shared and you are starting to feel the affects of the alcohol. You press the front of your body against Jacob and grab the back of his neck to bring his ear to your mouth so he can hear you over the loud music.
You mention having to get back to your friends but invite him to come with you. He grabs your hand and nods. Using the grip on your hand to pull you closer to him. "Y/n, I'm not going to lie to you," he says leaning into your ear now, "I am very attracted to you." You smile up at him and he reaches down and kisses you once, "Let's go find your friends." The kiss takes you by surprise but you welcome it.
You want the kiss to continue, hell you want to do more than just kiss him. "Come back home with me," you say. His hand rests in the small of your back, just above the waistband of your jeans.
He pulls you closer to him and he whispers in your ear, "Are you sure that's what you want? Are you asking me to fuck you?"
His forwardness makes you gasp. Not even a moment after you nod your head, he is pulling you towards the exit. You fish your phone out of your back pocket to text the group chat that you were leaving and you open an app to choose a ride home.
Not realizing how hot you were, you take a deep breath when the crisp outside air hits your face. Jacob pulls you around the corner of the building, hidden from the breeze as you wait. He wraps his arms around you from behind and pulls your back to his chest.
"You sure you want to do this, love?" He whispers in your ear. You stretch your neck, exposing more of it and your shoulder to him.
"Please, Jacob, I need it," you whine. His mouth has a mind of it's own as he leans down and trails small kisses up to your ear. The feeling of his lips on you sends a small moan slipping past your lips.
A grumble leaves his chest, "Needy thing, aren't you? Would probably let me take you right here in this alley," his voice is so low. "But I want to take my time with you tonight. Want to explore every inch of your beautiful body."
.....
You could both hardly keep your hands to yourselves during the ride home. After the car drops you both off outside of your house, you lead him up the concrete steps.
"Sorry, I didn't clean much. Wasn't expecting any visitors tonight," you say over your shoulder as you unlock the door and step inside. You own a small home in an artsy part of town. Your living room is littered with cozy pillows and blankets.
You pad down the hall on the wooden floor to your bedroom. He follows, taking in all the pieces that make it you. When he enters your room, he immediately notices your large collection of records.
"Quite the music lover, eh?" He chuckles, flipping through a stack.
"Well I did say that I don't play much. Doesn't mean I don't still have a love for it." You plop yourself down on your bed and he walks towards you slowly.
He shrugs off his jacket and you reach out to unbutton his shirt. His hands circle your wrists. "Easy now, love," there is that little accent coming through, "I want to go slow."
"Can- can I kiss you?" You ask, staring up at him.
He responds by tilting your chin up to him and he closes the distance. This kiss is much different than the one in the bar. There is fire behind it. "You taste like whiskey, love, my favorite." His tongue darts out and brushes your lips. You part them, welcoming him into your mouth. Giving him anything he wants. His lips move along your jaw to your ear, where he bites the lobe with his teeth. You squirm below him. "Oh, you liked that didn't you?"
"Ja- Jacob, please," you huff out, panting below him.
He grabs the hem of your sweater and you nod, allowing him to remove your top. What he didn't expect was for your chest to be bare underneath. You move up the bed, laying your head in your fluffy pillows. He unbuttons his shirt and tosses it to the floor. Moving to take his necklaces off, you blurt out, "No! Leave those....please." a blush creeps up as you feel embarrassed. You can see his already hard cock twitch in his pants.
Moving his way up your body, he plants kisses along your sides. "What's this?" He says as he licks a stripe at the sword tattoo between your breasts. A groan leaves your chest at the sight.
"Old tattoo, I'll tell you later." You pant as you pull him back in for another assult of kisses. Done with the small talk, you just want him, in any way you can. You rub your hands over his toned back. His necklaces dangling beween you as he breaks the kiss and uses one hand to massage your breasts. Rolling your nipples between his fingers. He watches your face, the way you scrunch your eyebrows together in pleasure.
"One thing, love, I like to play rough. Do you think you can handle that?" He looms over you, smirking.
Your eyes open and you prop yourself on your elbows. "Jacob, if you don't hurry up, I'll kick you out and finish this myself, you've been driving me crazy all night" you say in a sassy tone.
"Fine, if you want to play, I'll play. But just so you know, I wanted to go slow." He pauses, "maybe next time." He shoots a wink your way before sucking a nipple into his mouth. His tongue rolling it over and over.
Next time?? You didn't even care. This man had barely touched you and you were on edge. You'd give him anything he wanted.
............
Part 2
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