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#I feel like I can’t stop thinking about her
luveline · 1 day
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hi jade! ☺️☺️ ur one of my favorite writers gosh you feed my heart everyday
im currently going through my usual body-wrecking periods 🥲 ur fics are helping
could you write something for bombshell! x spencer where maybe deeper into their relationship she is open with him about her period and he comes over to take care of her when her body is aching or she feels nauseous. im thinking some hair playing or some tummy rubbing.
i hope your weekend is lovely 🫶
thank you ❤️❤️❤️ fem, 1k
Can I come over? Are you home 
You summon your first smile of the day, reading Spencer’s text. 
Don’t know, you text back, can you handle me? 
Usually not, but that hasn’t stopped me so far. I’ll bring dinner? 
What kind of dinner my love  
Maybe Indian? What do you want? I want tandoori chicken 
Indian food is awesome if that’s what you want, I’m just messing with you 
You can hear his voice in his next text, I know that. So I can come?
You can always come over but I have to warn you, I’m irritable 
What’s wrong??? 
Spencer texts again before you can answer, I’ll come now and we can order delivery, I’ll be right there 
You decide to call him before he can make the wrong conclusions. He answers so quickly you laugh down the line. “Spencer, hi, there’s nothing that wrong.” 
“What does that mean?” 
“You don’t have to rush over.” 
“Well, what’s wrong? Did I do something?” 
“Why do you always think that, babe? No, you didn’t do anything. You’re actively making me feel better just talking to me.” 
Spencer pauses briefly. “Really?” 
“Really. I’m on my period, it’s kicking my ass,” you mumble, dropping your face into the soft top of your couch. “It would make me feel so much better if you were here. I want a hug.” 
“I’m coming. I haven’t brushed up on my hug skills for a while–”
“You hugged me yesterday before I went home?” 
“How would you rate that? On a scale of one to ten?” 
“Ten, definitely.” You sigh and stretch out your legs. “No, just, my stomach is hurting and I feel sort of sick from the cramps. I’m a bit… depressed, maybe, so you don’t have to come over if you don’t want to. I might not be good company.” 
“You’re always good company, you loon.” 
“You what?” 
“Sorry, I’m trying to be playful.” 
“I know that, you loon,” you say, grinning. “Okay, you better be putting your shoes on. My patience is running out.” 
“I’m by the door!” he says, giggles woven through each word. You can picture his smile, his unbuttoned coat. “You feel sick, should I still get dinner?” 
“Yes, please. Tandoori chicken for me too, and–”
“I know what you want.” 
“Okay, I’m gonna go shower before you get here and see me all disgusting–”
“Don’t you dare.” 
“Spencer!” you laugh. 
“I’ll run you a bath when I get there. Can you sit down until then?” 
“I can’t believe how you’re speaking to me. You used to blush when I said hi.” 
“Because you never just say hi. And it’s not like anyone else saying hi, it’s you.” 
Spencer lets that kindness sit with you and says goodbye, promising he’ll be there soon with dinner. You hold your sore stomach and wait, flicking through tv channels, craving something warm to eat and a warmer chest to lay your head. Spencer’s hugs are without doubt a ten out of ten experience, he’s weirdly good at them for someone who maybe hasn’t had as many as he deserves. His hands are active as the rest of him stills, rubbing over your shoulders or your chest with care, his hair soft and ticklish on your cheek or his lips right next to your ear. 
You’re dozing when he lets himself in. The rustle of a plastic bag awakens your dormant appetite, and you force yourself to meet him in the hallway. 
He drops the bag like it isn’t forty dollars worth of food and beams at you. “Hi,” he says, fawning at your sloppy pyjamas. “These are cute, they’re way too big for you.” 
You manage to hug him first, your arms around him and face screwed up in his chest. “Hi. My stomach hurts so bad, I missed you.” 
“How bad?” he says, dropping his volume. “Have you ever considered you might have endometriosis?” 
“Spencer, I love you, can you hug me for now and tell me about it later?” 
“Sorry,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. “Where does it hurt, everywhere?” 
“It’s in my back.” 
Spencer drops his hand lower. “Oh, here?” He rubs your back, and he leans away enough to see you eye to eye. “Let’s have dinner, then at least you’ll have a full stomach.” 
“I don’t know if I can manage it, but I’m starving.” 
“You don’t have to eat everything.” He visibly looks you over, one feature at a time. His eyes get stuck on yours, your lashes, and his lovely mouth tips down. “Were you sleeping?” 
“Got bored waiting for you. I’m not tired,” you promise. 
“It’s okay.” He grasps your back and rubs at it with good pressure, the shard of a cramp held back by his touch. “You okay?” 
You lift your chin, turn your head just a touch to one side, asking and not asking. He smiles in that not so secret pleasure as he gives you a quick peck. It’s quick and chaste and everything you need, better when he encourages your face into his neck to give you a last good rub on the back. “Do you wanna sit down? I’ll make you a plate and we can eat on the couch.” He dots a kiss against the highest point of your cheek. “I got you motrin. And tylenol, too.” 
“I don’t need any painkillers, you’re gonna rub my back.”
Spencer smiles into your cheek. “Mm, I’ll relax your uterus. Rhythmic touches.” 
“That’s one way to say it, sweetheart.” 
“How would you say it?” he asks, cupping the back of your neck tenderly. 
You deflect, not wanting to make fun of him. “I love you.”
He pulls away, grinning, failing to talk. He's smiling so hard. When he goes in for a third round of hugs, you aren’t surprised. 
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dazednmatthews · 23 hours
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don’t ever tell me to go away (from you) ~number neighbor!matt x reader part fifteen
i’m so sorry that this is like days late omfg. i haven’t forgot abt my promises to finish this or the last chris work i want to post!! ive just been so fucking busy it’s insane. i love u guys let’s get back to it fr (this is not the last part of number neighbor y’all)
“dumb. this is so dumb.” y/n says under her breath, restlessly pacing in front of matt’s door.
she’s been losing her mind out here for about twenty minutes, walking to her car then back to the front door and then all over again. she knows she looks fucking insane, but she can’t help it. the anxiety was tearing her stomach to shreds.
she hadn’t put much thought into it, really. after her conversation with daria, she was immediately met with a wave of determination. she showered, put on a presentable outfit and even brushed out her curls, which was a lot better than she’d done for herself the last seven days.
she hadn’t stopped to think about it until she was halfway here. she had matt’s address because of the one time she had a matching minions poster delivered (he hated it) and it had just lived in his contact file ever since. she knew that she had to talk to matt in person. one, because she knew that she would a hundred percent pussy out over the phone, and two, she knew he deserved that. at least.
thinking about it now though, y/n is shaking in her fucking boots at the thought of matt slamming the door in her face. or calling her a psychopath (derogatory) for showing up at his house unannounced. the only reason she even knew he was home was the car parked in the driveway.
in hindsight, maybe this was a bad idea. maybe it was too soon, or worse, she was too late. the thought has her spinning around in place, ready to beeline it back to her car for the last time.
because nothing ever works the way she plans though, she’s frozen in place by someone calling her name.
“y/n?” nick is baffled by the sight of the girl who’s had his brother losing his ever loving mind in his driveway. he has the car keys in hand, looking as if he was going to go search for something.
y/n gives a smile that probably looks like she’s being electrocuted. “hey, nick.”
he’s standing there absolutely dumbfounded, mouth slightly ajar. she’s never even been to their house, or met him and chris in person. it was awkward, because what is she supposed to say? “hey nick! don’t mind me, i’m just here to beg for your brother to talk to me again! nice weather, right?”
it was something close to her worst nightmare.
there’s another voice. “nick! what the fuck did we say about leaving the door wide open?”
chris comes out the house while looking at his phone. when he bumps into nick’s back, he looks up with a scowl. when his eyes shift to what nick is looking at, his jaw drops dramatically. “holy shit.”
y/n shifts on her feet uncomfortably. she feels like she’s in a zoo, being watched and marveled at. it’s strange, talking to them so much on the phone with matt yet standing in front of them for the first time in the middle of a fucked up situation.
“hey, chris.” she does a weird hand wave that makes her want to punch herself in the face. “um, is matt home?”
they just nod, still unmoving. chris speaks first. “his room is up the stairs to the left.”
she basically runs away from the scene, thanking them. she can hear nick whisper-yell to chris behind her. “this is fucking crazy!”
she bounds up the stairs hurriedly, not stopping to look around. she can feel herself panicking slightly, but before she knows it, she’s already at matt’s door and already knocking.
she can hear a muffled, “fuck off.” and a groan, but she knocks again anyway.
there’s a couple moments before he opens the door that y/n tries to slow her heartbeat. it works. for maybe three seconds. cause then matt is flinging open the door, irritation on his face and tight tank top resting on his top half. then her heart is nearly hitting him with how hard it’s beating out of her chest.
the irritation in his face drops when he realizes that it’s in fact not his brothers coming to annoy him for the seventh time that day. but y/n can’t decide if the look he wears now is any better. it’s blank and indifferent. like her presence is no longer something he’s affected by. and man, does that fucking suck.
she forces herself to speak. “hi, matt.”
he scans her face. “y/n.”
she shifts uncomfortably again, only this time the feeling is much worse. “can we talk?”
“you can’t just show up like this,” he says, using the same words she’d spoken to him a week ago. it makes her stomach twist in guilt. “it’s not fair.”
her palms are sweaty and she feels like she might throw up. it doesn’t help that his hair is messy and fluffy, just how she likes it. or that he’s wearing a different color variation of those stupid pajama pants. not to mention, there’s that fucking chain. her being is torn in half from being so insanely attracted to him and feeling so absurdly guilty.
“i’m sorry.” she offers, pleading look across her features.
matt runs his tongue over his top teeth. “for showing up unannounced or for ghosting me completely?”
“both.” her voice is low, scared that he’s about to slam the door in her face.
he must accept that answer though, because he widens his door, stepping aside for her to come in.
she does, and instantly shes hit with about a million different memories while looking around his room. all the countless hours on the phone; laughing and arguing, flirting and fake-bashing each other— it caused an ache in her she didn’t know how to soothe. she wanted to try though.
when she turns around, matt is leaning against his bedroom door, arms crossed. he’s not saying anything, which is fair, but it does nothing to quell the worry clouding her.
“how-“ she stops, stuttering slightly. “how are you?”
matt raises an eyebrow. “fine.” his eyes are guarded. “if you count out the fact that the only girl i’ve been talking to for like forever suddenly disappeared without a trace for reasons she won’t tell me.”
she deserved that. “damn.”
her eyes widen after that because that is so not what she meant to say. she’s a shaky, disoriented mess and the fact that matt looks completely uninterested in what she has to say isn’t helping at all.
“is there a point to this or did you just come here to stare at me?”
“yes to both,” she admits, rubbing at her face. she takes a deep breath, choosing to just jump in. she thinks about daria’s words and she goes for it. “i’m a fucking idiot. i’m sorry.”
he doesn’t say anything, so she continues. “i didn’t mean it. what i said last week. when we were texting and when you came to my house. of course i care. of course this is something to me.”
matt still looks unbothered. it makes y/n want to stop talking, to run out of here and never look back. but she knows that she has to keep going. she has never once in her life backed down from a fight, and she wouldn’t start now.
“i was… scared.” she says begrudgingly. you have to be open with yourself. “everything was moving so fast. by the time i realized i liked you, i was so fucking obsessed i could barely even think about anything else. it freaked me out; made me feel like i had more to lose than you did.”
matt kisses his teeth. “i told you multiple times that i liked you. wanted to talk to you all the time. wanted to see you all the time.” he pushes off the door, coming to stand in front of her. “every ounce of free time i had was filled with you. do you think i spend hours on the phone with just anyone?”
y/n’s eyes are trained on the floor. “it didn’t matter because it all felt like a joke. saying shit like that was just how we were. it felt okay because it was never super serious. but as soon as i actually realized how i felt, i freaked and pushed you away. and then when you texted me that you wanted to be official it felt too good to be true. like you were lying. or it was another joke that we would laugh about. so i completely shut you out. and i’m so fucking sorry for that.”
matt scratches at his beard, which is so grown out it was making her dizzy. his eyes are soft but hesitant and all y/n wants is to kiss away the doubt she created.
“i meant what i said,” he lifts her head with his hand, making her look at him. “the or something.”
she knows exactly what he means. the blush that burns beneath her skin could light a fire. the second their eyes connected it felt like the world fell away. she wants to capture this feeling and tuck it away for any bad day after this. this feeling that matt gave her of iridescence. like she could shine in the darkest room. like she was something worth looking at. something worth really seeing.
the words are at the base of her throat, fighting to get out. she wants to tell him exactly how she feels but it’s still fucking stuck.
“just or something?” she baits, leaning into his touch when he moves his hand from her chin to her cheek. she kisses his palm and suddenly she feels like she’s right back on that park bench the first time they met. excited and giddy and nervous for the future.
matt’s lips turn up just the slightest bit. “if you think i’m gonna be the first one to say it after the hell you put me through,” he leans down and kisses the corner of her lips. “you’re even crazier than i thought.”
y/n has no choice but to laugh at that. it’s breathy and fleeting, because the heavy words are still on the tip of her tongue. she knows matt is half kidding, but he has a point.
she trails a hand up his chest, fingers toying with the chain she’s completely infatuated with. she hooks her index finger around it, tugging matt down to her level. she ghosts her lips over his. “unfortunately for the both of us, i’m in love with you, stupid.”
y/n finally wins the smile from him that she’d been fighting for. “unfortunately?”
she shrugs. “yeah. for you, because now you’re actually stuck with me. for me because you’re the most irritating person i’ve ever met.”
matt looks at her, eyes sparkling. there’s no joking annoyance or fake flat look. his eyes are lit up like the fourth of july, telling her exactly how much he’s ready to be stuck with her. he doesn’t even roll his eyes.
“i think i’ll manage.” he says, bumping his nose against hers, silently begging for a kiss. “i love you too, stupid.”
there’s about a half a second that y/n takes to just look at him, take him in. the man she loves and that loves her. then she basically jumps on him.
matt laughs into her lips and it sounds like heaven to her ears. he picks her up, wrapping her legs around his waist, kissing her like he’d missed her all his life.
it’s teeth and tongues and longing all being tied into each other. it’s doubt and fear and time wasted all falling away. it’s exactly where they need to be.
matt pulls away, and y/n opens her eyes, annoyed. “i wasn’t done.” she’s pouting, childishly.
matt smirks, moving to sit at the foot of his bed, still attached to his dream girl. “i know i’m irresistible but hold on a second.”
“i hate you.”
“no actually, you love me. said it yourself.” he winks obnoxiously, giving her a peck. his face stills momentarily, giving y/n a look that puts her on edge. “i just want you to know that i would never hurt you. i understand why you did what you did, i really do. but i need you to promise me that the next you feel like that or any kind of way, that you’ll talk to me. cause i can’t do that again.”
for a moment, y/n can see just how much it actually hurt him. how her apathy and avoidance had wriggled into his chest and made him the slightest bit insecure. he’d never tell her, but she knew.
so she grabs matt’s jaw, cupping it between her hands. her fingers scratch at his beard slightly and he preens at the touch. “i promise. i won’t shut you out again. i’m sorry i ever did.” the kiss she leaves on his lips is so soft, so gentle, she thinks she finally found the way to soothe and squash the ache. “i think you’re my favorite person.”
he smiles at her. it feels like no love she’s ever known. “you’re my favorite too.”
they spend the rest of the night there, wrapped in each other tightly. hands wandering and clothes falling. lips leaving white-hot kisses and sinfully sweet noises leaving them breathlessly.
and when matt’s lips leave a toe-curling trail of kisses all the way down to right between her legs, y/n thanks the fucking universe that she was bored that random day four months ago.
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everywhere, everything | jm x female reader [au]
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Summary: In recent months, the bar your family has owned for generations has changed. Now it can't keep a bouncer beyond one shift, attracts the 'wrong' crowd, and is an albatross around you and your cousin's neck. Your cousin's latest hire, Joel Miller, seems like he might just survive the shift and as time passes, you can't help but want to know him more. AKA the Bouncer!Joel fic Word Count: 8.2k Warnings: 18+ MDNI, mentions of canon typical violence, RoadHouseBouncer!Joel AU, no outbreak, no specified age but reader has a cousin and inferred (not detailed) family deaths in the past, flirting, smut (p in v, and fingering), Joel Miller is his chaotic self, mentions of death of a child (canon), many scenes set in a bar and mentions of alcohol or drinking, your standard lolabee flangst and introspection, reader mentions music, singing and playing guitar. Notes: So much love for this fic goes to @trulybetty for encouraging my ideas and @rhoorl. Watching the new Road House movie at the same time as starting TLOU games created this concept in my head I couldn't let go of. Fic title from the Noah Kahan song of the same name.
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It’s starting to weigh on you.
You see it in your cousin more though; the weariness in her eyes as the local gangs come in and inevitably cause trouble. Both of you know where it comes from, the reasons behind it, why it’s so much worse for your roadhouse than anywhere else in the town.
Most days, you want to leave and sell up. Sometimes a fight is too much, it isn’t worth the cost, there’s too high a loss, too tiresome a battle. Everything your cousin possesses is tied up in the bar though. It’s not that simple for her and you won’t walk away from your family. You can’t.
The two of you cannot be the ones who let decades of your family’s legacy just wash away to nothing.
That was why your cousin had started with the bouncers in the first place. The two of you can only afford one, but it’s a small building, a small town.
“This one will be different,” your cousin says with a firm nod and smile that doesn’t quite meet her eyes. “I just know he will. He’s new in town, he starts tonight and he - when you meet him, you’ll see what I mean.”
You don’t say that she said the same thing about the last bouncer - what was his name? Dave, or Frankie, or something like that. You’ve stopped learning their names now - it’s pointless when they never last longer than a few days.
The bar is still quiet; tinny music coming through the speakers as you finish unloading the clean glasses from the dishwasher.
“Are you playin’ tonight?” she asks.
“Might do. If the crowd let me,” you say, smiling at your cousin gently. It’s a joke now; the bar hasn’t been safe enough in months for that.
It used to be your favourite thing about this place; the music, the ability to perform songs and transport yourself to what could have been, what could be. It might not be Nashville, or the Sofi stadium, but it’s the closest you think you’ll ever get to feeling like a real musician. And now you don’t even have that.
“Good, they will. It’s going to be a good one tonight, you’ll see.”
The new bouncer is called Joel but your cousin calls him by his surname: Miller.
He’s quiet, not like the other one. Instead of stalking around and flexing, Miller sits in the corner of the bar, perched on a stool and staring into a cup of coffee as though it would answer all his queries about the universe.
You feel bad about the coffee; you should have warned him that it’s truly awful, pointed him in the direction of the small diner ten minutes away that serves some of the best coffee in the whole state. You think your own coffee isn’t too bad either; perfected and tweaked over years to figure out the perfect combination of beans and grind to bring the best out of your worn moka pot.
“Next time, I’d go for water,” you say lightly as you approach his side of the bar. It’s still quiet for this time of the evening but the trouble doesn’t usually start until after ten anyway.
“Oh, yeah?”
“I’m not sure we can even legally call this coffee. I think there’s more caffeine in the Kahlua.”
“You have Kahlua?” Miller asks.
“It’s a very old bottle, I really wouldn’t risk it.” You try and remember the last time someone ordered a drink with it here but it’s hazy. The Bar doesn’t exactly attract people for its cocktail list anymore.
“Pity.”
“I can get you a water if you’d prefer. Or something else?”
“It’s fine.” You notice Miller has pushed the cup slightly away from him though. He eyes it with mild disgust and you feel suddenly even more worried for him. If he can’t handle the coffee, he surely won’t be able to handle the patrons.
“You’re Joe, right?”
“Joel,” he corrects instantly.
“Joel, right. Sorry.”
“Are there that many of us passin’ through, that you don’t learn the names properly now? Is that why your boss calling me Miller?” He doesn’t know who you are, that’s clear. He doesn’t know it’s your family’s legacy here too and you’re not just a bartender. This place matters to you.
“It’s only your first shift.”
Joel sighs and meets your gaze. His eyes are deep brown and you take in the slight salt and pepper to his stubble, the surprisingly comfortable looking plaid flannel he’s wearing. At the same time, you notice the stoniness in his posture, the wariness in his eyes.
He isn’t spoiling for a fight because he lives for them, not like the other bouncers your cousin has hired.
You’ve already realised that Joel Miller fights in an entirely differently way to his predecessors. You can tell his biggest battles aren’t the ones in a bar like this. Without projecting too much, you think they’re probably inside his mind. No one has haunted eyes like that without a story. You’re a bartender, you can just tell.
“What have you have been told about this gig? Do you know what you’re getting into?”
“I know this place has some troubles,” he says carefully.
“I’ll say.”
You remember when things were different in the town, in the bar. It wasn’t like this back then. It used to be for families. Your aunt once joked that your dad’s cooking could bring the entire town together. It’s been a long time since the place was known for a family meal though.
You grew up with laughter and joy inside these walls. Now, it feels like it must have happened somewhere else entirely. This bar is still where you ran in after being asked on your first date ever, where you opened your SAT results, studied while the bar was closed, had every family significant gathering or event you can remember.
This isn’t just a job for you.
“How long have you been here? No offence, but you don’t seem the type -”
“It’s my family’s bar. Your boss you mentioned, she’s my cousin. The two of us run it these days, well I mean, I only help out. It’s her bar now more than mine but it’s been our family’s place for generations. We’re what’s left.” All that’s left.
“I didn’t know. I wasn’t - I didn’t mean anything by that.”
“Of course, Miller.” His words weren’t meant with offence but he had still managed to pick at your vulnerability that you don’t truly belong and cut at your soul.
Your family never thought you’d keep up with the bar, your cousin was the clear front runner to inherit it and you supported that. You wanted to leave your hometown, that had never been a secret and your childhood bedroom had been covered in posters and postcards for exciting and different places.
Once, you dreamt of Nashville, of music venues and guitar calloused hands playing idle melodies as a tour bus drove you to your next city across a starlit sky.
Life had different plans for you thought.
“This town didn’t used to be like this,” you add, “We’ve had a lot of bad luck and - the whole town is suffering. You wouldn’t have recognised this place if you passed through even just a few years ago.”
”I’m -“
The door to the bar crashes open before Joel can finish his sentence. You notice the first of the regular troublemakers walking in and warily look around the bar. You can tell by their posture, the look on their face exactly what type of night it’s going to be.
“Looks like your work will be getting started soon, Miller. I’d drink up.”
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He might just survive his first shift. That’s annoying - you have five bucks counting on him either walking out or be stretchered out like any of the bouncers by the end of the night.
You try and pay attention to your surroundings. It’s sensible in your line of work. For so many people that line between a good night and becoming the worst version of themselves is wafer thin and you’re often the first line of defence, you’re the one who has to say when someone’s not being served anymore.
Your cousin is in the back office, trying to sort out the multitude of paperwork that comes with owning a bar or business that nobody ever thinks about.
He’s calm, polite even for the most part.
He doesn’t escalate the situation, not like some of the bouncers who have spent a shift here recently. Mostly he sits and observes. His calmness is almost disconcerting and contrasts sharply with the danger in his posture, the readiness to move he’s concealing.
There hasn’t been too much trouble so far tonight; a mild fight which was easily taken outside but you can feel the tension in the air.
“Can I get ‘nother whiskey?” Robert slurs. He’s a regular to the bar now and has a particular penchant for not being able to handle his alcohol, being very resentful at being cut off, and worse of all never has enough money to cover his bill or damages.
“I think you’re done for tonight,” you say lightly.
“Nah, I say when I’m done.”
“Not according to the liquor licence,” you snark back.
“Look, just pour me -”
“You’re done.”
“You’re such a fucking bitch.” Robert slams his fist down on the bar.
“I think it’s time to go,” Joel says politely, suddenly standing next to Robert in the bar. You’re not sure if he’ll last as a bouncer here but you’ll give him points for stealthiness. You hadn’t even heard him approaching.
“I think -“ Robert starts before pulling a sloppy punch. Joel easily dodges it, raising his eyebrow incredulously at Robert.
“C’mon, now, it’s time to go.”
He places a hand on Robert’s shoulder and guides him out. You’re struck that he didn’t escalate the situation - that was the last bouncer’s mistake. What he hadn’t counted on was what Robert is a mean drunk and often gets a second wind of energy.
Joel walks back up to you at the bar. “The way people talk about this place. That wasn’t so -“
“That, Miller, that was nothing.”
You watch as another troublemaker, Owen, walks in, all biker vest and swagger. It’s never a good night when he’s here. Usually his presence signals a full moon style night of fights, shouting and misery. He hasn’t been in for weeks to your joy; you’d heard a rumour he was in jail. Not any more though.
“Miller you see now the trouble’s really going to start. That wasn’t even your warmup.”
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Sunlight streams through the window as you finish wiping over the table. It’s your favourite time of day in the bar. Your cousin is catching up on admin, sleep and supplier deliveries, the bar is empty and it’s just you, the stereo and sunlight.
You can’t help but lose yourself in the music just for a moment. You love this song, the beat, the lyrics, the way it ebbs and flows in all the right places. Music is magic.
You’re not in a rundown bar, not weighed down by obligation and memories and self-doubt. You’re not here, you’re somewhere else. In a city, in a crowd, on a stage or even just dancing around somewhere else. You’re lighter and freer and desperate for the song to continue just a little more as you spin around, humming along with the lyrics.
You hear the door open and turn around quickly. You heard about the diner getting robbed a couple of weeks ago. You should have locked the door.
Miller’s there, some light discolouration to his jaw from the one punch he didn’t dodge, but otherwise intact.
“You seem surprised to see me,” he says.
“You’ve cost me five bucks,” you reply simply.
He raises an eyebrow, “Didn’t think I could hack it*?*”
“The odds are the odds.”
“Well, I’m sorry about your money.”
“Yep, that five bucks was my ticket out of this town,” you joke.
“Not sure that would even cover a bus ticket,” he replies dryly.
“Maybe the coffee for on the bus?”
“Maybe.”
“So, day two,” you say awkwardly, swinging your arms around you and then immediately wondering why on earth you did that. You busy yourself by turning down the speakers.
“Yep,” Miller says casually, sitting on a bar stool.
“Have - are you hungry?” you ask, suddenly conscious that it’s lunchtime and Joel not doubt has another difficult day ahead.
“I could eat.”
”It’s nothing fancy, because the kitchen’s not open, but it is homemade - well, it was. I froze it but it’s defrosted and it’s really good. Also, frozen food still retains its nutrients well, and in the case of cake, freezing it makes it even better.”
“I see.” Miller pauses, “It’s not cake, is it? I don’t think I can eat frozen cake before a shift. ”
“No,” you argue, “it’s Tuesday, that’s what we’d do on a Wednesday! Today it’s lasagne.”
Miller smiles then. It’s a good smile. Slightly crooked and his eyes crease a little, the way you always associate someone smiling when they mean it. His deep eyes are momentarily lighter, there’s a change in him.
You want to tease more smiles out of this man, want to identify each and every changed in his face or the way his hands tap against the old bar. You want to keep him like this, bask in the glow that you’ve bought that expression to his face.
“Lasagne sounds great,” he says after a moment.
“Sure, okay, Miller. Coming right up.”
“Call me Joel. Please.”
“Okay, Joel.”
You like how his name sounds against your teeth, the way he smiles once more when you say his name.
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It becomes a habit. Joel survives shift after shift and inevitably turns up to the bar early the following day when you’re there.
He’s lasted longer than fourteen bouncers now. He might just make it. He’s quiet, yes, but you’ve seen the violence in his movements when needed, the way he tries to be polite and then it’s over, then it’s a line. There’s something that compels and terrifies you about the violence he holds, its contradiction because he speaks to you so softly and how can a man be capable of both?
“You need a second bouncer,” he says one morning as you’re trying and failing to sort the back door out.
The employee room in the bar is a barely functioning space. Cliche after cliche with the cheap red IKEA futon, mismatching furniture and chairs and elderly microwave and kettle. The air conditioning has never worked in the room and now the back door is jammed too.
The place is falling apart.
“Can’t afford it,” you reply nonchalantly. “We’re doing our best.”
“I know. But then someone could try and watch at the door, stop some of these people coming in.”
“I know. But no one’s coming in because they’re there so we can’t afford a bouncer. It’s uh, a catch 22. Can’t even afford to replace the damn -” You shove your weight against the door to no avail.
“I can fix that,” Joel says softly as you kick the door one more time.
“The gangs? That’s ambitious.”
“The door.”
“Oh, it’s just the weather and it always gets stuck now. Replacing it would cost-”
“I can fix it. I uh, used to be a contractor.”
“A contractor?” Joel hasn’t talked about his past much before. You know he has a brother, he’s the oldest and that he’s from Texas. Joel carries that
“Did you have to say that with the air of a cowboy in an old movie?”
“I wasn’t aware I did,” he replies, cocking his eyebrow in a way.
“What sort of contractor were you?”
“Building, just the general type.”
“Oh, okay. So you could actually fix the door?”
“I said so, didn’t I?”
“How do you get from contractor to bouncer?”
“It’s a long story.”
“I’d expect so.”
Joel squirms awkwardly. You’ve watched him easily apprehend aggressive gang members shouting the vilest things to Joel and move them outside. You’ve seen him barely blink over ill drunks spilling their souls on his shoes. You’ve seen him so strong and resolute.
He looks at his watch which, for the first time, you notice is broken and then at the ground.
“It’s fine, Joel,” you say, “you don’t need to tell me anymore.”
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He keeps coming back, night after night and things start to change. It’s small, a fixed door and then a window catch replaced, the fact the gangs start coming around less. It’s change but the quiet type of change you only discover through previously entrenched routines.
You’ve spent time cataloguing his details, each scar or line, the way he takes his coffee (black, but a two to one ratio of sugar that makes you wince a little). Joel Miller has a sweet tooth.
You’re used to Joel now, you like talking to him in quiet moments in the bar, before or after shifts as he hangs around just a little longer. You tell him about the town, about how it was growing up, he lets it slip he’s from Texas, mentions a brother, Tommy, and you want to unpeel his secrets more and more.
You proudly place the slab of cake in front of him. Rain hammers against the windows and roof, creating great echoes as it sounds like the bar will come down around you. It’s unseasonal, the rain, an omen of quiet days. Today you don’t mind.
“What’s the occasion?” Joel asks, looking at the cake curiously.
“It’s a Wednesday.” You take a bite of your own slice, savouring the flavours, the delicate balance of sponge and icing. If you can say so, it’s a pretty great cake. You really have improved over recent months and while this was experimental, you’re happy with the result.
“Ah. Say no more.”
“Also, congrats, you’ve officially been here for eight and half weeks.”
“I pass probation then?” Joel looks around dubiously, clearly concerned your cousin or others will suddenly pop out in some surprise party or sense of occasion.
“Pretty much passed that by coming back on day two, but that’s my cousin’s domain. I just pour drinks.”
“And provide frozen food to the bouncers.”
“Only the ones who come back. Besides, it’s defrosted. I can take that cake back you know.”
“No, don’t you dare.” Joel takes a large forkful of the cake. “So why the cake though, sweetheart?”
“You, Joel Miller, are officially our longest standing bouncer.” You clap lightly in mock celebration as he cocks an eyebrow in response.
“What an honour,” he replies sardonically.
”You’re welcome.”
“Do I need to make a speech?”
“I think it was the speech that bought the previous record holder down.” Clint had lasted forty-five minutes after that speech. It was a bad night - a particularly nasty gang fight.
“Hubris,” Joel says lightly.
“Exactly.”
“Not bad for a contractor turned bouncer though.”
Joel laughs. “You going to tell me that story one day?” you ask, hoping your teasing expression hides how genuine your question is.
“Maybe,” he says. “You’ve not hit my records yet.”
“That a challenge?”
He shrugs and walks towards the door to ready the bar for opening.
You hand Joel the frozen peas wrapped in an old cloth. After the commotion, your cousin’s closed the bar early. It’s hard to recover the night from a scene like that and you’re pretty sure the broken table and glass amount to some sort of safety violation at the least.
“Thanks,” Joel says gruffly.
“You could have a concussion.”
“I'm fine.”
“You’re bleeding.”
Joel looks at his cracked knuckles and raises a finger to the cut on his head, lightly touching it and observing the blood that comes away on his hand. “’m fine.”
“You hit the bar.”
“Standard night on the job.”
“You hit it with your head.”
Joel shrugs, nonchalance and mischief at once.
“How’s the idiot?” Owen had come in with the intention of causing trouble; something about the rival gang, or his girlfriend, or something that would never justify his trail of destruction. Joel had maintained his usual rules; polite, carefully moving Owen outside the bar, even as he tried to fight back. You’re not sure how it went so wrong, how instead of getting Owen outside suddenly there were more of the gang, broken tables and chaos.
It’s been weeks since a night like that. It makes it feel brand new, the hurt starker somehow.
“He needs to go to hospital,” you say, wrapping your jacket around you after you lock the bar door, keys heavy in your hand.
“Oh.”
“He’ll be fine. His friends are taking him. You probably need the hospital too, I’ll drive you.”
“’m fine.”
“You’re not. Get in the damn car, Joel.”
“I’m -”
“The car, Joel. Don’t make me start calling you Miller again.”
Joel holds his hands up and shakes his head. “Fine, I’ll go.”
“Excellent,” you say with a sweet smile.
You drive in near silence but once you’re both in the hospital waiting room, he talks. He talks more than he ever usually does.
“I didn't need to come here,” he grumbles.
“Are you on the lam?”
“What?” He asks incredulously.
“You seem reluctant to be in a hospital that takes down personal information. It’s a reasonable question.”
He sighs, pinches between his eyebrows. “No, I’m not on the damn lam. I just - I just don’t like hospitals.”
“I don’t think a lot of people do. I guess it’s an occupational habit with your work.”
“I patch myself up usually. Last time I was in one of these places, it was … I was …”
“Joel, it’s okay, you don’t have to say anything.” You reach for his bloody hand and squeeze, unsure if the blood on it is from his own split knuckles or the fight. The violence of his body contrasts so much with the man you talk to, the friend you’ve made.
“When I told you it was a long story, how I went from a contractor to this … it’s, I don’t know.”
You shift so you can face Joel and try and model your best supportive expression. Joel and you talk about everything now, but he’s guarded and this is the first time he’s volunteered this story to you.
“We can talk about it later.”
“I had a daughter,” he says so quietly that you can barely hear him. “And then I had a chance, a second chance to - but it’s been a mess. I’ve been a mess. I’ve got a lot wrong.”
So much of Joel Miller makes sense to you know and you can understand the sadness that crosses his eyes sometimes, the reluctance to talk about his past.
“Haven’t we all?” You pause. “I’m really sorry about your daughter, Joel.“
“I don’t know how to make it right now though.”
“I think,” you say gently, “all you can do is try. For what it’s worth, you’re making a difference here, you’re making a difference with me.”
“Really?” He glances up at you, suddenly years younger and as you nod a slight smile light up his face briefly.
“Why don’t you tell me about her? If you want to.”
He smiles. “I do, but not tonight, but I will.”
“Joel Miller,” a doctor calls.
“C’mon, you’re up.” You squeeze Joel’s arm before standing up.
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The balance has shifted and something’s changed.
The bar changes gradually like the way spring teases itself for weeks. It’s all subtle shifts, blossoms of hope and shoots of a future you didn’t dare think of too much. The bar might survive, your cousin is smiling again.
And then there’s you and Joel. Joel, who still pops in to talk to you even on his days off. Joel, who you sit out with after the bar closes and drink beer and play guitar to the stars.
“You should play here,” he says, taking a sip of his beer, “you’re good.” “You’re better. I can’t play guitar like you.” “Nah. Just had more practice at best. Your voice is pretty, so pretty.” “Oh, I’m not so good at playing. I’m better at singing,” you say. “Four basic chords are about my limit on the guitar.” “Don’t do yourself down.” “Trust me, I’m not.” You pause. ”Joel, you could - you could play with me. If I ever played here. it’s probably stupid.” There’s something unreadable in his eyes, a soft smile on his lips. “No, I’d like that.”
You’re accustomed to his presence, his low but grounding voice, his calm demeanour throughout all chaos.
He’s told you more about his past now. About Sarah and how her loss tore him apart for years, and also about the foster daughter he took in, Ellie. He won’t tell you much about Ellie though, except they stopped talking around about the time he became a bouncer. He once asked you if you would do anything to save the life of someone you love and you said yes. He nodded and moved on. You think it’s connected, you’re not sure.
You’ve worked at a bar long enough to know when it’ll be a bad night. There’s an electricity in the air, a tension that is so tight anything could snap it. You look over at Joel to see if he’s picked up on the same energy.
He’s sitting on the stool, observing quietly, but you notice the slight furrow in his brows. He looks at you and his mouth twitches into the smallest of smiles, but there’s anxiety in his eyes.
“I heard that Owen’s gang declared war on the Rattlers,” you say in a low voice. You don’t like Owen, or his friends, but the Rattlers are worst. Owen’s gang is the typical cliched grouping of a small town that’s become lost. They drink too much, throw punches without thinking and cause trouble. They’re not evil though.
The Rattlers are.
“Didn’t hear the Rattlers came through here,” Joel says in a low voice. “I heard of their reputation at a previous gig.”
“Their uh, second in command, is that the term? Anyway, he’s had a thing with someone in town for years. On and off. Guess it’s on again.”
“They cause trouble when they’re here?”
You scoff. “This was starting to feel like -”
“It still is, it still will. Let me do my job,” Joel says firmly.
You want to trust him; you do trust him. It’s the Rattlers that worry you, the feeling in your gut that this hard sought over peace is threatened, the deep and terrifying fear that this bar can never change. Not now. Not even with Joel.
Joel smiles at you, the picture of reassurance. “Owen might not come in here. This is hardly a welcome environment for his group anymore.”
“Joel,” you say nervously, “I just … I have a feeling.”
Joel doesn’t laugh or dismiss you; he straightens up and nods.
You’re not sure how things fall apart so quickly. One moment the bar was quiet, then Owen was there and before Joel could get him to leave, the Rattlers were here too. Maybe it was planned, maybe it was what they all wanted.
“Evening, unfortunately I need to ask you all to leave tonight,” Joel says politely, standing from his barstool. “I’m afraid the business is at capacity and we have a private function on.”
“Well,” Owen begins.
“Leave.”
“Look, Miller, it’s not -”
“I’m not asking, Owen.” Joel’s voice is low, deadly, the tone he uses when polite words fall flat, when it’s time to not be nice. “That goes to all of you.”
Owen falters slightly at the sound of that, you wonder if he remembers how things went the last time Joel used that voice.
“Y’all got a function on?” one of the Rattlers asks you. He’s covered in tattoos and is wearing a leather vest with numerous patches with no other top underneath. You wonder if he based his outfit on the existing tropes, if he’s intentionally as cliched as possible or if it truly is just an unspoken truth now. His hair is slicked back into a ponytail that highlights his receding hairline and a puckered scar that runs from his brow to his nose.
“I’m afraid so, gentlemen. While we, uh appreciate the desire to visit, I’m afraid Mr Miller is correct.“”
“Really?”
“Uh huh. It doesn’t look so-”
“Please,” you say quietly.
For a moment you wonder if it will work, you’re on bated breath as the Rattler steps back and moves to say something to his gang. However, that’s the very moment Owen smashes a chair on his back and hell breaks loose.
“Oh, thank you so fucking much for that,” Joel says in an irritated voice, immediately pulled into action to try and get the situation outside, away from the patrons, from you.
You step backwards, hoping the protection of the bar will be enough.
People are running out of the bar as the chaos unfolds. It’s a flood of sound,
Someone pushes Owen onto the bar, pummelling him as you try and back away. “Please stop,” you say.
Then a flash and searing heat.
That’s when you hear Joel swear, you notice his eyes have darkened, his entire demeanour has changed.
Your vision is blurred by something and you can feel a sharp pain on your face along with something sticky and hot when you touch it.
You shut your eyes, willing the events away and allowing yourself to crouch under the bar and wait for the noises to stop.
It’s fine. It’s fine.
You’re fine.
“Hey, hey, hey, it’s okay,” a soothing voice says. “Ladies and gentlemen, I apologise but we do have to close early today.”
There’s a pause, noise around you and then something cool on your face. “I need to see the damage, okay? It’s me, it’s Joel, you’re going to be okay. I’ve got you.”
You open your eyes to see Joel crouched in front of you. He’s holding a damp cloth that is already soaked in red.
“You’ll need stitches, I’ll drive you.” Joel moves your head gently and nods. “Your eye looks okay; can you see normally?”
“Yeah. What happened?”
”Fucking - it was Owen, he grabbed a glass from the bar and instead of hitting the rattler - ”
“Got me.”
“Yeah. It’s deep but um ‘”
“I’ll live. I’m okay. Don’t need hospital.”
“Huh, you trying to prove a point here? How annoyin’ it is when someone who needs hospital won’t go?”
”It’s fine, Joel.”
“You’re hurt,” he says and he looks disappointed.
You feel a burst of shame, you should have defended yourself better.
“I’m going to call your cousin and tell her what happened and then I’m driving you to hospital. No arguments, okay?”
You try and smile weakly in acquiescence which seems to only make Joel frown more.
His hand lingers on your shoulder slightly as he hands you the seatbelt after bundling you into his truck. He moved quickly, closing the bar, making a hushed call in the corner to your cousin and then immediately guiding you out, a clean cloth placed in your hands to hold against your cut.
There’s a nodding dog ornament on the dash, something that doesn’t seem like Joel at all.
“Ellie,” he says quietly as he notices you looking at it. “Keep the pressure on that wound, okay?”
He turns out of the bar.
“Didn’t seem your sort of ornament,” you reply placidly.
“She called it Ernie, I - that kid.” Joel sighs heavily.
“You could call her,” you say, braver in the wake of your injury.
“I would. But she doesn’t want to hear from me, trust me.” He mumbles something else you can’t make out.
“You’re a good person, Joel. She -”
“I’m not.”
“You are,” you say, “trust me, I know bad men, but you aren’t one of them. Owen? The Rattlers?”
“The bar’s pretty damn low there.”
“You know the town I live in.”
Joel chuckles mirthlessly.
“I was going to play tonight,” you say quietly, “I thought it was time. That’ll teach me.”
“You could still play, maybe tomorrow though.”
“It would be harder with the blood right now.”
“Just a tad.”
“Thanks for driving me.”
“Of course.”
You wonder if he’s trying to return a favour, whether he’s the sort of person who just can’t feel indebted to someone else. Now you’ve bled on his car too, now you’re even?
He looked worried though. You think about the way he sounded too, the forced calmness when he checked on you.
You’re friends.
That’s normal, right?
“I’m sorry,” he says suddenly. “You shouldn’t have got hurt.”
“Joel, it’s … you can’t be everywhere at once. It’s not on you.”
“I should have -”
“Miller,” you say sharply, “it’s not on you. Not one bit. Do you think I can bar Owen for good now?”
Joel chuckles. “Yeah, I reckon so.
“Good, well that’s something, isn’t it? Almost makes it worth it. Do you think it will scar?”
“I don’t know, sweetheart.”
You pause. It’s vanity, you know, but the idea of this leaving a permanent scar on your face hurts worse than the injury itself.
“That’s not ideal. I-it’s stupid.” It feels so foolish to be worried about a scar when things could be so much worse, for your own vanity to say ‘well, now, you’ll never make it as a musician or star’ or to focus on your looks. It’s normal, it’s human, but it makes you feel guilty.
Joel looks at you carefully and he places a warm, solid hand on your hand that is not holding a compress to your face. “You’re so beautiful, you know that, right?” he says in a low voice. “This won’t change that. It couldn’t, okay?”
No-one calls you beautiful. There’s been half-hearted claims of your ‘hotness’ with exes, of your friends’ encouragement when you make a particular effort in your appearance, but nothing like this. Nothing that feels this sincere either.
He takes his hand away as the doctor joins you. You can feel the heat lingering like butterflies as the doctor attends to your wound.
Joel stays with you the whole time.
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You hear the guitar before you can see him. Soft, melodic chords that reach a crescendo as you walk closer to the small cabin style house he’s renting. You’re not sure if it’s a complete betrayal of the trust from when you dropped him off after his hospital trip weeks ago, but you need to see him outside of the bar.
“Hey,” he says in surprise when he sees you. He places the guitar carefully down before standing up to greet you.
“I’m sorry to just turn up, I hope it’s okay.” You awkwardly clasp your hands and wring them together. “I was passing through and I thought - I thought I’d say hi.”
This is a complete lie; you are not passing through at all.
You’re wearing your favourite outfit and you sprayed an extra two spritzes of your best perfume on this morning. In fact, you have made considerable effort when you think about all of this.
“No, it’s great. I’m happy you stopped by.”
“You’re good. The guitar, it was … really good. I’ve not heard you play that before.”
“Oh, it’s just something I’ve been working on.”
“It’s really good.”
“Nah, not really.”
You frown, hands on your hips and he raises his own hands in defence.
“Can I - do you want a drink?” Joel indicates inside the cabin and you nod enthusiastically.
“That would be great, thanks Joel.”
There are three cabins in the area that a local businessman rents out. Joel’s cabin is the closest to the woods, the one that’s slightly hidden away. Inside it looks like a typical rental; the slightly shabby furniture and neutral demeanour that feels void of any character, the aged kitchen stove and units, an abundance of wood furniture.
There are touches of Joel too though. There’s a vinyl player and box of records on the coffee table, a plaid blanket over the sofa and a couple of photos on the fireplace mantle. You think they might be Sarah, maybe Ellie, but you don’t want to pry.
This changes things. It’s not the bar, neither of you are at work, or hanging out outside after a shift. This feels more personal, more intimate. This is Joel Miller, the real Joel, the one you can’t hide your feelings for now.
You do have feelings for Joel.
It’s funny, when he started you wanted to keep him at a distance because you expected him to leave like everyone else, you thought the bar was beyond help. You wondered if you were beyond your dreams. He’s helping bring you back though.
It’s his calm demeanour, the wry expressions and dry humour, his plaid shirts and the way when he smiles, which is rare but you’ve seen it, his whole face softens and lightens up. It’s electric.
You think about him all the time; reading articles you try and remember to bring up at the bar, when you hear a song he’d like. Joel’s found his way into your life and you don’t want to let him go.
He’ll leave though. The bouncers inevitably do, most people in your life do. You just don’t want that with him. You want him to stay.
“Are you okay?” Joel asks.
“Why?”
“You have that serious thought face on.”
“I have a serious thought face?”
Joel scoffs. “So, what’s up?”
“I just - I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come here.”
Joel frowns then. “Why not?”
“I don’t know.”
“Okay, c’mon I said I’d get you a drink, right?” Joel indicates the sturdy wooden table and you sit obligingly. “So I’ve got a choice of tea, well It says it’s tea anyway. Uh, some whiskey, beer, water …. I’m out of coffee.”
“That should be illegal.”
“Shouldn’t it?”
“I might just leave now.”
“Wouldn’t blame ya.”
He’s close to you now and you feel emboldened by the fact you’re here, you’re with him and he’s not pushing you away or looking like he wants to leave. Maybe, just maybe this is a great idea.
“Now I think about it though, I’m not sure that I’m thirsty after all,” you say boldly.
“Oh no?” He leans in closer, hands hovering just over your waist. “Look, you don’t want -”
“I do. I do want.”
Joel swallows. “Really?” He’s looking at you as though you’re something mythical, something intangible he could lose at any second. There’s reverence in his eyes and it’s overwhelming and beautiful at once.
You nod. “I’m not the only one here who - I’m not though, right?” There’s a hint of nervousness in your voice now, a sense that perhaps this isn’t the great idea you thought it was just seconds ago. It’s like whiplash. This is why you should just focus on music instead.
“No,” Joel says softly, “you’re not.”
His hands, hands you’ve seen both acts of violence and hold your injured face so gently, skim your body. Joel’s hands, like him, are contradictions. He steps minutely closer, a little more into your space and oh so welcome.
He smells like soap and coffee, with the faint hints of autumn you noticed around the cabin and there’s something magic in this Joel Miller. Something in every sense of him, the way he touches you, the sound of his voice, the feel of his skin and sound of his voice that instantly draws you closer, that makes heat pool in your stomach.
He kisses you and you reach for his hands, entwines them together. He stops, concern mounting over his face. “You’re injured, I should have -”
“Doesn’t hurt,” you say softly, drawing him close again.
You’re a mess of hands and lips, a clash of sensations and finally, finally this is happening you think as h guides you further into the cabin. Towards his bedroom.
He guides you past the kitchenette, down the narrow corridor to his room.
You want to drink him in, absorb every detail of his body and commit it to memory.
There’s a ragged scar on his abdomen, a light scattering of stories across his body from other bars, other jobs, other Joels.
There are other details you want to remember though, especially the look in his eyes right now, heavy with desire.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says. You’ve heard the words before in similar settings but it’s been clear to you it’s the lust, it’s the ‘right’ thing to say. You know when isn’t meant, the lack sincerity signalling a paint by the numbers dalliance at best.
Joel’s voice is fervent though. Honest. He means this.
The majority of your clothes are soon discarded, both yours and his in a combined mess on the floor.
Your hands are running through his hair as he guides you onto the bed, as his fingers hover over the edge of your underwear.
He pauses, just for a moment. You wonder if it’s recognition of the line you’re both about to cross, if it’s to give you the space to confirm that yes, you still want him, to offer an out just in case.
You reach for his face, run your hand down his stubbly cheek. You’re trying to sum up your thoughts, to bring everything you want to say together into a neat sentence.
You smile and gently say, “I want you, want this. I thought you knew.”
“I didn’t, I didn’t think you’d want me. Been driving myself crazy thinkin’ about you lately.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Why don’t you show me what you thought about?” you ask.
He smiles as his fingers finally reach beneath your underwear, carefully pulling them down and then gently gliding his finger.
You’re wet, almost embarrassingly so, you think, for just making out.
“This all for me?” He asks with a devilishly teasing tone.
You don’t immediately answer, just smirk as he teases up to your clit and traces circles around it, smiling as you finally make a groan of contentment.
He slides a finger inside you, lazily moving it within you, finding that spot that makes you moan, adding another finger.
You feel close already, but he withdraws his fingers and then, looking at you, brings them to his mouth one at a time in a move that makes your cheeks heat up.
He moves to his bedside drawer, fumbling for a box of condoms you suppose. You’re still lost in catching your breath, in replaying the last few moments, in anticipating what’s about to happen.
He kisses you before positioning himself and you ready yourself for him.
You’re entwined, adjusting yourself for the feel of him, the weight of him. Hands interlocked with his as he finally moves, as he meets your kiss once again.
He adapts quickly, noticing micro=movements or sounds and changing his rhythm to draw every one of them out, to bring you to the edge once more.
You’re both a mess of rushed breaths, a chorus of names and gasps, ebbing and flowing to tease each other apart.
He’s everything and nothing like you expected. Hoped for even.
The feeling builds in your stomach, the rush of pleasure building almost unbearably.
Finally, finally you get your release. The ripples of pleasure ride through your body as the two of you lie together, boneless, catching your breath.
You usually feel a need to say something, to fill a silence, but it’s comfortable. You roll over, daringly placing an arm over Joel’s chest and leaning close. He pulls you towards you, kissing your brow lazily
You can feel his heartbeat, the warmth of his skin.
You feel like you could stay here forever.
Instead though, you’re practical. You excuse yourself to his bathroom to clean up.
You take in your reflection; the telltale signs of your exploits feel so visible to you as you freshen up.
He’s not in bed when you return. You pull your clothes on and head back into the main room of the cabin.
Joel’s wearing his jeans and not much else, humming as he concentrates on something by the stove.
“I promised tea, didn’t I?”
“We did get sidetracked.”
“Well, that was welcome,” Joel says. His voice is so much softer than you’ve heard it in the bar. There’s a vulnerability leaking through with each moment you stay here. It’s two sided, you can feel your own edges softening, a desire to open yourself even more to the man in front of you.
“I agree.”
The kettle boils and you watch Joel making the tea, try and not lose yourself in the broadness of his shoulders.
“So …” you break off, swinging your arms nervously and then wrapping them around yourself.
Joel hands you a steaming mug. “So,” he says. His voice is calm though, relaxed and somehow that helps.
“That wasn’t exactly ”
“Would you have been wearing a trench coat?”
“That a fantasy or something, Joel?”
He laughs. “Maybe, maybe it is.”
“Okay then. Logging that for another day.”
“Oh really?” Joel’s smile warms his entire face, it softens each feature and it’s something you never want to stop seeing.
It feels like you’ve known him so much longer. You feel comfortable in his house, you feel comfortable around him.
“So we’re opening back up at the weekend,” you say, “Got any plans for this time off?”
“Nope. You?”
You shake your head. “How about that?”
“Hmm, that’s not right. We should do something about that. Let me take you to dinner?”
“Dinner?“
“People still do that, right?”
“Yes, but - I’d love to.”
“Great. I’ll uh, defer to your recommendation, seeing as you know this area more.” It hits you then. Joel doesn’t have roots here and the bar, except for the Rattlers, has improved. What does this town, what do you have to offer?
“Are you going to leave?” you ask suddenly, the anxious thought you’ve tried to suppress bubbling to the surface.
“Leave?”
“When the bar’s open, when there’s no trouble.”
“There’s always some trouble.”
“Don’t. You know what I mean.”
Joel sighs and takes a sip of his drink. “Usually, I would.”
“But this isn’t usual?”
He points his hand at you and adds, “I don’t make a habit of this. I don’t …. Usually, yes I go in and out of places and I don’t stay long.”
Your heart sinks. “I understand,” you lie.
“I think, I think maybe there are some reasons to stick around here though?” It’s a question, not a confirmation. It strikes you then that maybe Joel feels just as exposed as you do.
“I think there could be,” you say.
“Good. I’m glad.“
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The bar looks like the Rattlers never came through here. Everything is neat, clean and in its place. There are no broken chairs or tables. It seems almost impossible for how short a time ago it was.
Joel helped, you realise, he helped your cousin bring this place back.
“Are you okay?” she asks, “I can cover the bar if you need -”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re sure.”
You pause and run your hand over the smooth, clean bar surface. You think of Joel, of the conversations over so many nights about music, about what makes you happy. “Can you still cover the bar for a bit?”
“Sure.” Your cousin pauses and hesitantly puts down the crate of soda bottles. “Is everything -”
“I want to play tonight.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, I’ve got to stop waiting right for the right moment, right? Just do it,” you say.
“And this has nothing to do with a certain bouncer?”
“No,” you say, thinking of the scar on your face, the battles you’ve won and will win in the future. “It’s for me.”
You can feel his eyes on you. It doesn’t make you feel nervous or under a spotlight though as you carefully sit on the stool.
It’s almost as though it’s just the two of you. Another night after work under the stars and messing around with a guitar. Or outside his cabin, thick flannel wrapped around you as you both play.
The bar feels safer somehow. It’s funny considering the recent Rattlers attack. Maybe that’s why - they came in and they tried to wreck the place, you were caught in that crossfire, but you survived. The bar survived. And the locals are back, the locals you wanted back. If you shut your eyes, it almost feels like before when your family ran the place.
It’s different though, because it’s your cousins. Because even though it might not be on paper, it’s yours too. Your legacy. You don’t want to fight it anymore. You don’t want to feel cynical about this town.
You look at Joel and smile and then you start playing.
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Everything Pedro tag-list: @harriedandharassed@pedrostories@hiroikegawa @pedrosaidsheispunk @pastelnap
201 notes · View notes
steddiecameraroll · 19 hours
Text
Pt 1
Steve tells Eddie about the bet
“Dude, you’re not going to believe this.” Steve leans against Eddie’s headboard and tries to exude nonchalance.
“Sup?” Eddie plucks his acoustic guitar trying to work on one of his new songs.
“At work yesterday, Rob and I were talking about random shit and you won’t believe it, but for some reason she thinks you have a small dick.”
“What?” Eddie stops moving his fingers to gawk at Steve.
“I know, man.” Steve puts his hands up with a shrug. “I tried to defend you because we’re friends, and that’s a part of the code. I’m not gonna let someone say that about you. But she was weirdly adamant, even bet me. Which, I mean, that’s crazy.”
“She bet you? Wait,” Eddie furrows his brows. “She bets I have a small dick?”
“Yeah, rough. I bet you don’t, though.” Steve takes a sip of his beer to stop from saying anything further.
“Of course I don’t. What does she think small is? Does she think I have a micro or something?” Eddie puts his guitar down and turns to face Steve completely.
“I don’t know.”
“Why would she say that? Does it look small in my pants?” Eddie looks down at his crotch and Steve tries to keep his eyes pointed upwards.
“Y’know I haven’t really looked.”
“Shit,” Eddie stands up and shakes his jeans out. “Does it look small?” He keeps his head down trying to gauge based off the bulge.
“Um, it’s kinda hard to see.”
“What?” Eddie angles his hips trying to let the overhead light shadow over his jeans. “Wait, it’s just cause they’re black jeans. Look.” He says before quickly unbuckling his pants and then shoving them down to his thighs exposing the blue plaid boxers underneath. “See?”
Steve swallows hard when he notices Eddie thrusts his hips forward a little to accentuate the tenting of fabric.
“Mhmm, yep,” Steve says tightly.
“What was the bet?” Eddie leaves his jeans around his thighs and crosses his arms.
“Oh, uh,” Steve shakes his head and averts his eyes. “I’d have to buy her like an entire feast of breakfast foods. Basically enough food to feed a village.”
“Would you get any?”
“Probably not,” Steve nods solemnly. “She’s kinda selfish like that.”
She’s not, at all, and Eddie would know that if he was thinking with anything other than the size of his dick. But Steve’s taking the chance.
“Well y’know what? Screw her. I don’t have a small dick.” He leans forward and grabs his crotch for emphasis.
“Yeah, screw her. I bet you don’t.”
“Yeah, fuck that!” Eddie hooks his thumbs into his waistband and pulls his boxers down exposing his semi hard dick to Steve’s hungry eyes. “See?” Eddie takes his dick comfortably into his hand and absentmindedly starts tugging on it. “That’s not small.”
“N-no, nope, not at all.” Steve can’t stop himself from biting his bottom lip.
“I bet you have a big dick too, Harrington. Buckley doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” Eddie’s eyes drop to Steve’s crotch while his hand begins stroking himself slowly.
“It’s not as big as yours, but yeah it’s above average. She’s so wrong. I wouldn’t even know what to do with that thing.” Oh yes he would.
“You wanna touch it?” Eddie lets his now fully erect dick go, and it bobs in the air tauntingly.
“Sure?” Steve shifts on the bed to his knees, sets his beer on the nightstand, and crawls over to the edge in front of Eddie.
“She’s gonna owe you so much fucking food, man.” Eddie grins and Steve sorta forgot what they were talking about. “Go ahead, feel the weight.”
Steve reaches for it, trying to act like this isn’t life changing for him, and when his fingers brush against the soft warm skin of Eddie’s shaft the man suddenly shudders under the touch. A soft huff escapes Eddie’s lips when Steve looks up, mouth open, fingers wrapping around Eddie’s dick. Steve sees something flicker behind Eddie’s eyes that looks a lot like lust.
“Oh fuck,” Eddie sighs before leaning forward, grabbing Steve’s face, and kissing him hard.
Steve melts into the kiss finding it’s everything he imagined.
“You’re gonna fucking tell Buckley, you know for a firsthand fact my dick isn’t small.” Eddie growls then pushes Steve back onto the mattress before crawling over his body and kissing him senseless.
“Yeah I am,” Steve smiles and shifts his hips to get his legs comfortably wrapped around Eddie, pulling him in closer.
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Eddie takes a pull off his cigarette before passing it to Steve.
“I still don’t understand why she thinks I have a small dick.”
Steve puts the filter to his lips and ducks away to hide a smile. “No idea.”
“How did that even come up?” Eddie stretches out next to Steve, still naked, with the sheet only covering his lower half.
“We were just talking,” Steve shrugs before passing the cigarette back.
He knows that’s probably not a good enough excuse, so when Eddie puts the cigarette to his mouth Steve leans over and starts kissing along Eddie’s pecs to distract him. Eddie hums and stretches more, dropping his fingers into Steve’s hair and scratching gently.
“But, what were you talking about?”
Steve stops his kissing to lean up on his elbow and look Eddie in the eye. “Ok, don’t get mad, buuuut…” Eddie raises his eyebrows. “She only bet because I made her.”
“What?”
“I kinda wanted to see your dick, and I figured you’d show it to me if I told you Robin thought it was small.” Eddie’s mouth falls open. “But! I did not expect this turn of events. I’m not complaining,” he rushes out hoping to reassure Eddie. “Actually, I’m really happy about this.”
“Why didn’t you just ask?” Eddie says with a grin.
“What, oh hey, Eddie. Can I see your dick? I kinda can’t stop thinking about it and want to know how accurately close my imagination is. Like that?”
“Yeah, that woulda worked.”
“Jesus,” Steve sighs then collapses onto his back next to Eddie with a smile.
He’s going to be so sore tomorrow but it’s totally worth it.
Robin definitely owes him waffles.
182 notes · View notes
wafflefries13 · 3 days
Text
The Consequence of Late Night Calls
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Summary: You've been friends with Katsuki for years, and you've always thought it's been just that - friends. But when you get a late-night call, it might just change things.
AN: Last repost! The original post got eaten by Tumblr. I'm still really proud of this one. I wrote it back when I was first starting to publish fanfic and I like how it turned out.
Warnings: College au, drinking, language
The call shocked you out of a deep but impromptu sleep. You jerked up from the noise, a page of lecture notes sticking to your check. It fluttered back to the desk covered in its own mess of loose leaf documents, used textbooks that cost more than a weekend trip to Disney World, and a laptop missing three of its letter keys. 
You dragged your tongue against your teeth, trying to get rid of the cotton feel coating the inside of your mouth. Rubbing stars into your tired eyes, you wondered when exactly you had fallen asleep. Was it somewhere near memorizing the latin terminology for court rhetoric or around reading the case file and trial records you were going to be tested over on Monday? Deciding wondering was basically pointless, considering you had pretty  much forgotten all of it anyway, you pawed blindly around for your phone. 
“Hello?” You answered, eyes still closed, although it probably came out and more of a mumbled groan than anything else.  
“(Y/NNNNNNNNN)!” 
You pulled the phone away from your ear, wincing at the sudden loud noise. Blinking bleerally, you looked down at your phone. You had taken the caller ID picture a year ago, at a sorority Halloween party you barely remembered aside from the copious amounts of alcohol consumed followed by an ill-advised scavenger hunt that ended with a call to the police and the dean’s car somehow ending up in the agriculture department’s greenhouse crowded with Jack-O-lanterns. It was a profile shot of Bakugou Katsuki, his mouth opened in a mid-yell scowl, as was his standard expression, and eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. One hand extended to try and block the camera, the other clutching a brown bottle. He was wearing a fantasy barbarian king costume, chest bare to show off the taut muscles he worked so hard for all of high school to get. When he’d shown up in it, or, rather, when Kirishima had dragged him along in his own dragonborn costume, you couldn’t believe he still had it. You remembered sitting in your basement in 9th grade, pricking your fingers with a sewing needle as you and the rest of your newly formed D&D group, Bakugou and Kirishima included, spent way too much time and effort into creating your costumes. 
Rubbing at the bridge of your nose in a vain attempt to chase away the headache you could already feel forming, you brought the phone back to your ear. You could hear the low thump of bass heavy music in the background. 
“Hi, Suki,” You said, trying not to sound condescending, but it came out like that anyway. 
“Hey!” He said sharply. The rest of his reply was slurred smooth. “I told you not to call me that.” 
You smirked. “It’s cute.” 
“It’s embarrassing! ‘M not cute.” 
“No, you’re calling me at-” You pulled the phone away again to check the time. “Katsuki, it’s like two in the morning, what the hell?” 
You heard someone shout something on the other side of the line that Katsuki mumbled a reply to. To you he said, “Was thinking about you.” 
You felt yourself blush despite yourself. “You were thinking about me?” 
There was a clunk and a bump. You could imagine him falling against a wall and sliding down to sit until the room stopped spinning. “Yeah. I don’t like it.” 
You ignored the jab in your heart. “Well, thanks.” 
“It keeps happening. I’ll just be, like, doing stuff, and then I just think, ‘What would (Y/N) think of that?’ ‘I wonder what (Y/N)’s doing right now.’ ‘(Y/N) would know what to do now. She’s so smart. And her hands look so soft. And her eyes are so pretty.’” He was quiet for a second. “It’s annoying. I can’t stop thinking about you. And it’s worse when you’re here.” There was a shuffling as you heard him try to stand up then give up again. “Why aren’t you here? I want you here.” 
You were wide awake now. You clenched and unclenched your hand, trying to process the information your obviously drunk friend had just confessed. Your stomach churned in a mix of anticipation, anxiety, and straight up butterflies. 
What the hell did all of that mean? Well, of course you knew what it meant, or you knew what it meant when spoken by a sober person of sound mind and body. But there was no way, you tried to rationalize, that The Bakugou Katsuki, the guy you’d known since freshman year of high school when he’d punched a guy who had flipped up your uniform skirt on the first day, the guy who had surprised just about everyone in home economics when he busted out a three tiered cake like it was no one’s business, the guy whos ego was big enough to have its own gravitational pull, was confessing his feelings to you in a drunk rant at two in the morning. 
“Katsuki,” You said in a soft voice. “I-” 
There was a retching sound from the other end of the line. Katsuki coughed, tried to say something, then threw up again. “Aw, fuck.” 
That headache was back with avengence now. You sighed, looking for your keys. “Katsuki, where are you?” 
“Uhh, on campus? At the Kappa Alpha Betta Whatever house. There’s a party. Why aren’t you here?” 
“You know I hate all the Greek life bs. Stay where you are, okay? I’m coming to get you. You’re completely wasted.” 
“‘M not. I can handle what I drink.” There was another pause before he wretched again. 
“Did you just throw up again?” 
“...No.” 
“Cool. I’ll be there in ten.” 
You didn’t wait for him to respond before hanging it. You didn’t think your heart could take it if he kept going on like he had been. Grabbing your keys and heading out of your crowded studio apartment, you hopped in your car to go save your drunk friend from making any other ill advised decisions that night. 
You realized that you were probably over thinking the whole phone call as you drove through deserted streets. You couldn’t help it, it was a bad habit you had formed as a kid that now  made you obsess over court documents and testimonies in class. But now, instead of helping, it was picking you apart. What did Katsuki’s tone imply when he was talking to you just now? Could you trust the tone of an inebriated person? What did he mean when he said he thought about you a lot? You’d known each other for years now, being involved in almost all the same activities. Wouldn’t it be natural to think about someone you spent so much time with? But you’d known Kirishima for just as long, not to mention the rest of the self-named “Baku-Squad.” You’d never gotten a late night drunk call from any of them. Heck, Katsuki had known Izuku way longer than he had known you, and you were pretty dang sure Katsuki had never called him going on and on about how he always thought about him. 
Stopping at a red light, you pressed your forehead into the soft faux-leather of your steering wheel, willing your thoughts to calm down and just come to a rational conclusion already. Expect, you know, a rational conclusion that wasn’t that the guy you had carried a torch for for almost as long as you had known him might actually have feelings for you back. 
You turned on to the street lined with sororities and fraternities across from the main campus. You had to slam on your breaks almost immediately to avoid running over a tipsy, giggling co-ed who was stumbling out into the road. She didn’t even look up at you. 
You didn’t know exactly which house Katsuki was stranded at, considering you could see at least three different parties all going on at first glance. His “Kappa Alpha Betta Whatever” wasn’t very helpful, either, considering all the Greek letters adorning the houses blended together in your mind at some point. And you really didn’t want to tramp through a bunch of different houses tonight. 
Thankfully, you were saved the trouble when you saw Kirishima’s 1969 Chevrolet Chevelle park half off the curb in front of one of the houses. You’d know that car anywhere. Kirishima had dragged your group to various scrap yards and auto-repair stores all summer after he got his license, the first of you all to do so, in an effort to fix up the worn down Chevelle that he’d bought for a hundred bucks and a turkey sandwich. 
You parked on the other side of the street then jogged across to the house that was practically vibrating with heavy music and Greek life energy. Stepping over a semi-conscious frat boy laying in the doorway, you scanned around the house for any sign of Katsuki’s pomeranian-puff-ball hair. 
You spotted Denki lounging on a couch, a lampshade on his head and a tangle of phone chargers clutched in his fist. His hand sparked every now and then as he used his quirk to recharge the collection of phones. 
You lifted up the edge of the lampshade. “Hey there, Pikachu.” 
“Heeeeeey~” He said, giving you a thumbs up. You could already tell he was too far gone, although you didn’t know if it was from drinking or the over use of his quirk. 
“(Y/N)!” You heard a voice call behind you. A body fell heavily against your back. Sero wrapped his arms around you in a backwards hug. “Where you been? We missed you!” 
“Studying. I’m boring, remember? I’m looking for Katsuki, you seen him around?” 
Sero snickered. “Bakugou, huh? He’s been looking for you for a long time, right, Denki?” 
“Heeeeeey~” 
You swallowed hard. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” 
Sero snickered again, flopping on the couch next to Denki. “Can’t tell. Part of the bro code. And he said he’d kill me.” 
“That does sound like Katsuki.” 
Sero covered his eyes with his arm, head leaning back. With a wide smile, he waved his hand in the vague direction to the back door. “I think he’s out by the pool or something.” 
You waved bye. “Thanks, I’ll go check it out. You guys take care of yourselves, okay?” 
“Look at ‘em go,” Sero said to Denki as you left. “You think they’ll have a spring wedding?” 
“Heeeeeey~” 
*~~~~* 
You managed to weave your way through the crowd of bodies clogging the house to finally spill out into the back yard. You had no idea how people were able to stay this energized this late into the night with this many other people around. You remembered once being stuck at another party, early on in your college days. When it became super clear you didn’t want to be there, overwhelmed by the noise, the crush of bodies, and the suffocation of social enterprise, Katsuki had dragged Kirishima over to you, planting him in front of you as your ‘extrovert shield.’  He’d stayed with you behind the boisterous redhead for the rest of the night. 
You wondered if Katsuki remembered doing that, if he remembered any of the small nice gestures he did for you over the years. And now, with his call, with what Sero said, with your over analyzing brain, you were dissecting every interaction you could remember. Was the time he opened a door for you a signal? Was the reason he would ask to study with you for chemistry, when he was way better in practically every subject than you, just so he could be close to you? Were the times he had given you his jacket when you were cold meant to be a more intimate moment? 
God, you were going to go crazy. 
Walking around the pool, you finally spotted the hot-headed blond. He was sitting slouched over on the end of one of the reclining pool chairs, forearms braced on his knees.  You almost called out to him, stopping cold when you saw the girl behind him. She had draped herself over his back, chin rested in the crook of his neck, one had massaging his shoulder, the other conspicuously sneaking under the hem of his shirt to rub circles on his abs. 
You clenched and unclenched your hands, worry gnawing at you as a headache at the back of your skull. Had something changed between the time he had called you and now? Had there been nothing there to change at all? Had you been misreading this situation the whole time? 
Katsuki looked up, his permanently affixed scowl even deeper. The second his jewel-red eyes met yours, you felt your heart skip a beat. He jumped to his feet so fast the girl behind him fell back against the chair. He tried marching over to you, which was made only slightly less intimidating by the drunk sway to his step. 
You didn’t remember him being so tall. You’d just seen him this afternoon. There was a flushed blush across his face, adding a surprising softness. Were his arms always that strong looking? Were his eyes that piercing? Was his jaw that strong? 
“You came,” He said, voice rough as whiskey soaking into gravel. 
You spread your hands. “Well, you said my name three times, so, here I am!” You laughed nervously, trying to ignore how his gaze pinned you down. 
He took another step towards you, hand reading up. “(Y/N), I-” 
His cheeks turned from pink to green. Lurching to the side, he vomited into the pool. You tried to help him back up, hunched over and trying to catch his breath. The crowd of people around you groaned in disgust before rolling in to sarcastic applause. Katsuki flipped them off. 
“Alright, Suki,” You said, rubbing his back. “Let’s get you back home.” 
He grumbled, leaning his full weight against you. You almost stumbled and fell with the sudden shift of balance. Katsuki slid his arm around your waist, hand firmly grasping your hip, as if he was the one trying to prevent you from a drunken stumble. His fingers felt like fire through your clothes. 
You decided to go around the house instead of trying to push your way through it. Soon you were making your way across the street. It took some maneuvering to unlock and open the passenger door. You practically dropped Katsuki in where his head fell back with a groan. You grabbed his seat belt and stretched across him to fasten it. It wasn’t until he started petting your hair that your realized your position of half-way laying across his lap. You jerked back, some of your hair getting caught in his fingers. He made a disappointed sound at the loss of it. 
You slid back into the driver's seat, trembling hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. You had to take a few steadying breaths before you were ready to start the car. Pulling out of the neighborhood, you glanced over at Katsuki. His eye brows were furrowed, eyes closed, mouth pulled in a small frown. 
God, he looked adorable. 
You hit the break harder than you meant to at the light. Adorable? Where the hell did that thought come from? He’d probably be furious if he knew you ever thought that. 
But…
You risked another look at him. When he let his face relax like this, you could see the slight chub that still clung to his cheeks. Another thing he would hate to know that you thought was how much you loved the softness that it leant him. It was cute. 
Almost without your realizing it, you lifted your hand. You were overcome with the sudden urge to poke his cheek. A car horn blared behind you when your finger was less than an inch from his face. You let out an undignified squeak, hands slamming back to the wheel. Katsuki grumbled and turned in the seat, head resting against the window. You could feel the blush burning up your face. 
A few minutes later, you pulled back to the apartment complex. You both lived in the same building, Katsuki directly below your own unit. And now you were overthinking his reason for not living on campus. 
When you opened the passenger door, Katsuki almost fell out. You jerked forward to catch him then dragged him out. He half woke up, as feeble on his legs as a newborn horse. 
You lugged him through the lobby. He was muttering under his breath, but most of the words you could make out were curses. Not unusual for him. You pressed the button for the elevator repeatedly. It just blinked back at you. You sighed in frustration. They had been doing maintenance on your building all week, but now might have been the absolute worst time to do the elevator. 
You shook Katsuki’s shoulder a little bit. His head jostled like a bobble-head. “Suki, I’m gonna need your help here for a minute.” 
His head lolled forward, forehead coming down to press to yours. In a quiet voice, he whispered, “I’d do anything for you.” 
You shoved him upright, face burning. “Then walk up the damn stairs yourself!” 
Despite that, you still ended up half-carrying him up four flights of stairs. You were uncomfortably sweaty when you reached the door to Katsuki’s apartment. The two of you had traded copies of your apartment keys when you had moved in. “In case something happens to your dumb ass and I need to come save you,” He had said. He would frequently stop by, usually when you were hours deep into an all-nighter. He’d bring his laptop and work on whatever 12 page essay way due on your bed while you poured over case reports. You’d sit in silence, just together, sharing the same space, content with nothing more than knowing the other was nearby. Or he’d bring you real food to make sure you weren’t just eating ramen all the time. In turn, you’d pull him out for game night with the squad, make sure he’d actually call his mother once in a while, and lend an ear to his semi-nightly rants on whoever he decided to hate that night. 
You fumbled with the keys, jamming the key in the lock then pushing it open with your shoulder that wasn’t currently occupied by a half-asleep, full-drunk boy who had at least 50 pounds and ten inches on you. 
There was always an expectation with the rooms of single college boys. Greasy pizza boxes, empty bottles of booze displayed like expensive decor, at least one poster of a half-naked girl somewhere, probably a basket of clothes that should have been washed weeks ago. And while you knew plenty of guys who fit that description, Katsuki defied expectation. His apartment was always immaculate. His shoes were lined neatly by the door, a calendar above his desk  color-coded with assignment due dates, bed made. Katsuki may give off the persona of a punk, but you knew he was a straight-laced nerd through and through.  
With the last of your strength, you lugged him across the room, dropping him on his bed. With a groan, you stretched your arms up until you heard a satisfying pop in your back. Hands on your hips, you watched as Katsuki moaned, burying his face in his pillow and pulling his feet up from the floor. You sat on the end of the bed, tugging his feet to you to unlace his shoes. You let them fall haphazardly to the floor, too tired to care about his level of neatness.  
You grabbed a bucket from his hall closet, putting it next to the head of his bed for when he inevitably woke up vomiting in the morning. Checking his bathroom, you put a couple of painkillers and a glass of water on the nightstand with a post-it note saying “Drink Me.” 
Brushing your hands off, you looked around and checked your work. Satisfied that he wouldn’t kill himself between now and when you would inevitably check on him in the morning, you decided it was finally time to head back upstairs and get some well deserved sleep. 
But… 
You turned back at the door. Katsuki was splayed like a starfish, gently snoring with his mouth wide open. You also noticed his blushing red fluffy cheeks. 
You tapped the door knob a few times before sighing in surrender to temptation and turnin back. You knelt down next to the bed. For a moment, you just watched him sleep. He looked so peaceful now. You reached out. Your index finger sunk into his cheek like it was a marshmallow. You couldn’t believe you had never done this before. God, he really was adorable. 
Your thoughts were abruptly cut off as Katsuki’s hand shot up and grabbed your wrist with an iron grip. With a shriek, you tried to scramble backwards. Katsuki lazily opened his eyes, not at all bothered by your struggles. With seemingly no effort on his part, he tugged you forward. Off balance, you fell into his chest. Katsuki wrapped his arms around you in a bear hug, slinging a leg over yours, trapping you on the bed. 
“Katsuki!” You hissed. You squirmed in his hold, not getting any extra room. He just hummed, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. You were pretty sure your face was hot enough to start a fire. “Katsuki, let me go!” 
“No,” He mumbled. His voice rumbled against your skin sending shivers through your whole body. 
“Katsuki!” 
“You can’t leave. If you leave, you won’t come back.” 
You stopped struggling. “What are you talking about?” 
He squeezed you tighter. “I’m loud. I get angry real easy. I fight a lot. And you…” He trailed off, his breath catching and rattling in his chest. “You’re so much better than me. You’re nice and smart and talented and pretty and caring and… and…” You could feel the hot tears landing on your skin. He was starting to shake. His grip had loosened enough for you to get out, but instead you brought your arms up and pulled him in closer. “If I let you go, you’ll see how much better you are than me. And you’ll leave. You’ll leave me because you’re better and you deserve so much better. But I’m a selfish bastard and I just want you for myself because I love you so damn much.” 
Your heart dropped into your stomach. You wiggled your hand up, threading your hand into his hair and tilting his head to look up at you. 
“I love you too,” You said softly. “And I’m not going anywhere.” 
Katsuki crushed you to his chest, letting out another loud sob. You could feel hot tears pressing against your eyes. You had no idea Katsuki felt this way about anything; about you, about himself, about your relationship. 
But one thing you knew for sure: You loved Bakugou Katsuki. 
~~~
The first thing Katsuki noticed when he woke up was the head ache. His head felt like he had a railroad spike jammed through his temples. God, what did he do last night? There was the party at Kappa Alpha Betta Whatever house. It’d been fine for a while, hanging out with the guys, playing beer pong, winning some extra cash from freshman in poker (where did he put that money anyway?). And then…
And then someone had said your name. He’d heard it across the room, an amazing feat in and of itself, but his ears were trained for any news of you. He’d jerked up right when he heard it, missing his shot at the beer pong table. He gladly took his drink and went prowling through the house. Who had said your name? Were you here? Were you coming?  
It might have been selfish, he knew how much you hated loud crowds, but damn it, he wanted you here. He remembered the last Greek life party you had been at. He’d lost you at some point between getting into an argument with that damn Deku and pulling Denki down from a keg stand. He’d finally found you huddled into some back corner, looking like a rabbit about to dart from a hungry fox (he wouldn’t mind being that fox, honestly, he could eat you right up.) You’d lost the color in your face, hands shaking as you clutched your red Solo cup almost hard enough for your nails to pierce the plastic. 
He snatched Kirishima by his collar as he carved a path through the room. He planted the extroverted red-head in front of you, creating an extrovert shield between himself and the love of his life you. He’d spent the rest of the night talking to you. Nothing special, he couldn’t even really remember what about. But he did remember the relaxed slope of your shoulders, the spark in your eyes, the smile that played on your lips at whatever lame joke he had just made. 
Back in the present (or last night, whatever), he was still stalking through the halls looking for whoever had mentioned you. He heard it again, the tail end of your name, coming from the living room. 
“-(/N) never had it so good.” There he was, lounging along the bottom stairs with a smug look on his face as he regaled the small crowd he had attracted. Katsuki recognized him as one of those legacy kids, the one who showed up to the first day of orientation in a sleek black Bugatti and took up three parking spaces, talked in almost every one of his classes when he even bothered to show up, and was, without a doubt at every party on or off campus. 
And now he was telling a story about you. What were you ever doing with an asshole like him? 
“You would never guess it from how she dresses, you know,” The guy continued, lazily waving his half-empty beer bottle. “But she is stacked.” 
Katsuki tensed up, his heart jumping into his throat. He pushed aside the crowd until he stood right in front of the bragger on the stairs. “What did you just say?” He asked through clenched teeth. “You're talking about (Y/N) (L/N), right?” 
He lazily swept his gaze up, grinning wide when he saw Katsuki. “Yeah, (Y/N)? You know, she comes across as a frigid bitch, but let me tell you, she’s an incredible lay.” Katsuki’s vision went red. The crowd started to subtly shuffle away, feeling the cold change in atmosphere. “Not much besides that, honestly. Thank god her tits and ass are amazing, cause her face sure wasn’t doing it for me. Super boring, too, heard she’s failing her classes. Oh, well. Hey, I could use a side-piece when I’m running my own firm, you know?” 
The asshole never saw it coming. In the span of a heart beat, Katsuki had grabbed his designer jacket and hoisted him off the stairs, pinning him to the wall so his feet kicked to try and reach the ground. 
“You listen to me, asshole,” Katsuki hissed. “You never talk about (Y/N) again. You never look at her, you never talk to your shit-stain friends about her, you sure as fuck never tell another lie about her, or so help me, you’ll get to find out what color your liver is.” 
Katsuki was half-way sure the jerk had pissed his pants. He dropped him in a heap, landing in the puddle of spilled beer on the floor. He brushed his hand off on his jeans, eager to get whatever germs the gossip had off him.  
He was almost out of ear shot when he heard the rich kid spit and say, “Fine. She’s probably crawling with it if you’re dicking her down.” 
The kid’s head made a dent in the wall as he richoched back from the impact of Katsuki’s punch. He would easily have a black eye and a broken nose, the chipped tooth would just be a  bonus. 
Katsuki’s head was fuzzy with rage, stalked through the house, bee-lining it to the nearest source of inebriation. How dare he? How fucking dare that absolute ass-wipe ever even think of saying such horrible things about you? He wasn’t even worth knowing your name, much less saying it. Not to mention the fact he must be blind to think you were anything less than stunning. Ever since he had known you, you had been nothing but kind and smart and caring and funny and…
“Baku-bro, you doing okay?” 
Katsuki didn’t realize how tight he was holding his fists until he relaxed. His nails had made half-moon indents in his palms, his knuckles brushed red from the punch. 
Kirishima had his mouth pulled down in that stupid puppy dog pout. “I’m fine,” Katsuki brushed him off. He grabbed a beer out of an iced cooler, twisting off the cap in a single motion and chugging half the bottle. 
“Well, that’s good, cause I don’t think Tim Flood is making it out of here without a few stitches.” 
“Good.” Katsuki finished the beer and chucked it into a recycle bin. He grabbed another and stalked out of the room. Everything felt too hot, too tight. His head was pounding. If you were here, you’d get a bag of ice and press it against his forehead. You’d probably call him an idiot for getting into another fight, that he needed to learn how to manage his temper better. He’d call you a dumbass but let you lead him away somewhere dark and quiet, away from all the other more insufferable dumbasses. You’d find some pain killers, get him some water, because that’s just the kind of caring person you were. Maybe you’d bring him upstairs, lead him to an unoccupied bedroom. The two of you would sit together on the bed, maybe just a little too close. You’d hand him the water, his hand would brush against yours. You’d look down, shy, blushing cutely. He’d lean forward, thread his hand through your incredibly soft hair, angle your face up to him. Your plush lips would part slightly and he’d lean forward and - 
“Are you sure you’re good?” Kirishima asked, abruptly cutting off Katsuki’s impromptu fantasy. “Cause you don’t look so good.” Katsuki bit his tongue. “Is it because of what that guy said about (Y/N)?” Katsuki whipped around, glaring daggers. Kirishima smiled and put his hands up in mock surrender. “Hey, bro, it’s okay! No one believed him, anyway.” 
Katsuki scoffed, taking a swig of the beer. “(Y/N)’s too good for him anyway.” 
“I bet you think (Y/N)’s too good for everyone here, right?” 
“The hell is that supposed to mean?” 
“It means you need to hurry up and tell (Y/N) you like her!” Sero shouted, jumping in out of nowhere. 
Katsuki dropped his bottle, Kirishima catching it just in time, and grabbed Sero by the front of his shirt and lifted him up. Sero just grinned his stupid, wide grin. 
“Come on, Katsuki,” Denki said, slinging an arm around Katsuki’s shoulders. “We all know you’ve had a thing for (Y/N) since high school. Why don’t you just put us all out of our misery and tell her already?!” 
Katsuki felt his face heat up. “I don’t- I haven’t - Fuck you!”  Katsuki couldn’t remember why he was friends with these three idiots as they all burst out into laughter.
 He snatched his bottle back and pushed through the crowd. He needed some air. He heard Sero yell after him, “You have to tell her eventually!” 
And… That was mostly it. Katsuki’s memories of last night sort of started to trail off after that. He knew that he drank, he drank a lot. At some point he ended up by the pool. And maybe he’d called someone? Oh, hell, he hoped he hadn’t called someone. 
His eyes snapped open at the soft groan. There you were, just inches away from his face, fast asleep and tucked in his arms. You were pressed close, breasts pushing against his chest, legs tangled with his, one hand clutching his shirt. Your lips were parted ever so slightly, breathing heavy and even. 
And you were so fucking close. 
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. His arms tightened around you and he tensed. How the hell did this happen? Did you actually come to the party last night? When, and why? What had called you down there-? 
Oh. Oh, the call! He had called you last night? Some time in his drunken haze he must have figured out to bypass the timed lock he had put on it specifically to avoid calling people with a too-honest tongue. But had you…?  Nervously, he looked down. He sighed in relief. You were both still dressed. At least that was one mistake he knew he hadn’t made. 
Alright, that was one problem. Now, on to the next one: How was he going to get out of here without waking you up? Craning his head around, he checked out the room. Wait, this was his room. He was in his apartment! A picture of last night started to form in his mind. He’d called you, blabbering God knows what, and then you’d been a good person (why were you such a good person?) and had come to get him, to make sure he was okay. And then what? He’d somehow seduced you into his bed? No, it was more likely you had stayed to make sure he didn’t choke on his own vomit, maybe sat on the bed because it was the middle of the night and you were exhausted, and then… This. 
Okay, okay, no, this was fine, he could fix this. He could slip out, let you keep sleeping. He’d make some breakfast in the kitchen and then you’d wake up, wander in rubbing the sleep from your eyes in that cute way you did when you pulled an all-nighter studying. He’d chastise you for lugging his drunk ass up here, for being out so late at night. You’d wave him off, compliment his cooking, tell him to take better care of himself, and then smile up at him with that blindingly beautiful smile and sparkling eyes. 
“Morning.” Katsuki yelped at your greeting. He stared, wide-eyed, down at you, as you look back up at him lazily with those sparkling eyes. “It’s kinda hard to breathe here.” He realized then just how tight he was holding you. He jerked backward, his shout of surprise cut off as he fell off the bed. He rubbed his sore hip, looking up when he heard your giggle. You were leaning over the bed, smiling shyly when he caught you staring. 
He gulped hard, feeling his face burning up. “Hi.” 
You tucked a loose threat of hair behind your ear. “Hi.” 
He should say something. He needed to say something. God, why wasn’t he saying something? 
“I-“ Katsuki stopped with an incomplete thought in his mouth. He suddenly felt uncomfortably hot, his stomach clenching and throat going dry. Your face dropped as you lunged forward, dragging a bucket in front of him (where did that even come from?). He surged forward, clenching the sides of the bucket in a white knuckled grip, and threw up. 
You slid off the bed and knelt next to him. You rubbed small circles in his back, whispering small comforts as he coughed up bile and alcohol and who knows what else. You reached over behind him and grabbed a glass of water from his nightstand. 
“Here,” You said. “Rinse and spit. Don’t swallow or gargle, it’ll just mess with your gag reflex.” Rubbing the spike of pain growing in his forehead, he did what you said. When he caught his breath, he accepted the pain killers you had and dry swallowed them. You really had prepared for everything, huh? 
Katsuki shoved the bucket away with his foot, leaning back against the bed. “Fuck…” 
You hummed in response and scooted to sit next to him. “So,” You said. 
“So,” He said back. 
“I don’t suppose you remember much from last night?” 
He clenched his jaw, mouth going dryer than it already was, if that was possible. He tried to laugh, but it sounded forced and strained, even to him. “Hey, we’re both still wearing pants, right?” You didn’t laugh back. 
“So that’s a no then?” The seriousness with which you said that made him pause. 
“I, uh, think I called you?” 
“MmHmm. You didn’t sound too great, so I came to pull you out.” 
“Huh. Thanks for that.” 
“Yup.” You paused for a second. “Do you remember… anything else you said?” 
Fuck. 
“Uhh, I owe you breakfast?” 
You looked away. “Is there anything you maybe told Sero that you wouldn’t want him to tell me?” 
Double fuck. 
“If this is about Halloween last year, Mina was the one who brought the Ouija board.” He smirked at you, waiting for you to laugh with him. Instead you didn’t even look up, staring a hole in the carpet with the intensity of your gaze. 
You let out a sigh through your nose, pushing off your knees to stand. “I’m gonna head out,” You said, rubbing the back of your head and still not looking at him. 
Katsuki jumped up, immediately regretting as his head began swimming. “(Y/N), wait-“ He cut himself off with another surge of nausea and lurched towards the bucket. 
“Katsuki,” You said, sounding frustrated. “Look, I…” You sighed, running a hand through your hair and turning back to him. “We’ve known each other for a long time now, right? And for all the time I’ve known you, you’ve been stubborn and pig-headed and aggressive and just, you know, you. But still, in all that time, despite everything, I still…” You pressed your lips, looking for the right words. “I’m happy when I’m around you, Katsuki. I feel at ease, I feel protected, I feel like I can be better at anything. And I’ve thought about this a lot, so much that it makes my head spin and my heart hurt, but through all the trouble I still think it’s worth it. Because at the end of the day it means I still get to be with you and sometimes I just feel like that’s enough, but now I…” Your lip was trembling, tears gathering at the corners of your eyes. Katsuki wanted nothing more than to take a big step forward and wrap you in the biggest, tightest hug of your life. Finally, you sighed in defeat. “But if you can’t say it, if the One and Only Katsuki Bakugou can’t say it, then how the hell can I?” 
Your voice broke on the last word. Katsuki was so stunned and suddenly pinned with guilt that he couldn’t move when you spun on your heels and rushed out of his apartment. 
Oh, fuck. 
~~~
“Idiot,” You murmured to yourself as you fled up the apartment stairs, furiously wiping at your eyes to get rid of the oncoming tears. “Idiot, idiot, idiot.” By the time you reached your apartment and slammed the door behind you, you weren’t sure if you were talking about Katsuki or yourself. 
You felt sick. Anxiety gnawed at your mind like a starving coyote. Had you really just confessed your feelings to Katsuki? Had you really just confessed your feelings to Katsuki like that? Would he ever speak to you again? Would things just become too awkward that you’d be edged out of your friend group? They had known Katsuki much longer than they had known you, after all. God, what if he was calling Kirishima right now and telling him about the disaster of a morning, after you had taken advantage of his blitz out state and slept in the same bed with him? 
Well, no. Kirishima was probably still knocked  out from his own night of heavy imbibing. Not to mention that even he, the most kind-hearted and patient person you knew, would have to draw a line at listening to Katsuki rant while dealing with a massive hangover. 
And no, Katsuki wouldn’t do that to you. Despite his rough deminor, his abrasive personality, and his profane tongue, Katsuki was actually a sweetheart deep down. Maybe really deep down, but still. He wouldn’t be so intentionally cruel, even if you told him that you shared all of his baby pictures of him playing in his All Might onesie online. 
So then why were you still huddled on a heap on the floor, back pressed against the front door, crying? Why was this pit of loneliness blooming in your chest?  
You yelped at the sudden banging on the door. Who could be here so early in the morning? You had paid rent this month, right? You sniffed, rubbing your eyes and smoothing out your clothes. You hoped your cheeks weren’t the blotchy red they got whenever you were upset. You took a deep breath to steady your voice for whoever was outside. 
Opening the door, you looked up at a wide-eyed Katsuki, panting hard with determination set on his face. You groaned internally. 
“Katsuki,” You began,” About what I said, I’m sorr-” 
Without waiting for you to finish, Katsuki surged forward. You tried to take a step backward, almost falling, but he caught you, a strong grip on your shoulders. Without waiting for you to get your bearings, Katsuki leaned in, smashing his lips against yours. 
It wasn’t a graceful kiss, all clashing teeth and urgency rather than romance. His eyes were screwed closed. He stayed pressed against you, not moving, grip so tight on your upper arms you thought there might be a mark later. 
Just as suddenly as he had come forward, he jerked back, but kept his hold on you. You both breathed heavily, eyes locked. Your mind whirled, a hundred voices shouting at the same time. For once, you decided to ignore them and let your body do what it wanted. 
You reached up, wrapping your arms around Katsuki’s neck and pulled him back in. This kiss was controlled, soft and sweet. His hands dropped from your shoulders to wrap around your waist. He pressed in harder, adding desperation in the kiss, as if he thought you would vanish any second. When you both pulled away this time, he leaned his forehead against yours, noses bumping into each other, sharing the same breath. 
His voice was rough. “Sorry,” He said. “I had to brush my teeth first.” 
170 notes · View notes
azsazz · 4 hours
Text
All's Well That Ends Well
Hockey!Azriel x Figure Skater!Reader
Summary: Anon Req: our figure skater bby would totally wear azzies jersey over her pretty sparkly dress if he wanted her to 🥺
Warnings: None.
Word Count: 1,044
Notes: Belongs to the Shut Out & Penance & Out of Order world
_________________________________________
Raucous clapping and cheering surround you.
Your chest heaves from exertion, but it’s a good feeling, one that goes all the way to your bones, one you know will linger for days. That’s okay, because you nailed your performance today. This competition is in the bag.
The smile you’d been forcing onto your face for the entirety of your routine turns into a real grin at the noise. You pull yourself from your ending stance, taking a quick skate around the rink one last time, waving to those in the stands. The energy in the arena is insane and you’re really feeling it, a splitting smile on your face that falters when you meet the familiar hazel gaze of Azriel.
He’s not supposed to be here.
The Velaris Bat’s have one of their most important games of the season tonight against the Springview Wolves, their rival team of almost four decades. You have no idea how the feud started and don’t care to know; something about a broken bone or a girlfriend being stolen, you have no idea and didn’t care to listen when Cassian tried explaining it to you one night at the local dive bar you’d run into a few of the players at. 
You’d turned right the fuck around when you saw them and pulled out your phone to text your friends to meet up with you somewhere else because you see enough of the hockey team whilst having to share one rink, but Azriel had caught you before you could dip outside and all but dragged you into the back alley for some precarious touching that you were not going to say no to.
You’ve been a little tense lately leading up to your competition. No one would have blamed you for what you did with the sexy hockey player.
Azriel looks proud. There’s a slight lift to the corner of his mouth, the most emotion he’ll show in public like this, even though he thrives off of the chaos of the arena when he plays. His hazel eyes sparkle as they track you, how you only have eyes for him as you skate closer, a frown on your face, no doubt wondering why the hell he’s here instead of warming up for his own game that’s set to start in a few minutes.
He couldn’t miss your performance, though. The one you’ve been raving about all semester. The one you were worried about all night a few nights ago when his head was buried between your legs. Not even that could keep you from thinking about your performance today, immediately after he’d drawn multiple orgasms from you, you went right back worrying.
Shifting on your skates, you fly toward the door. Ice sprays when you shift, stopping abruptly before passing through the door, ignoring your coach in favor of rushing over to where Azriel’s standing stock still.
“What are you doing here?” you exclaim, falling into his arms when he opens them. Your heart flutters at the feeling of his strong hands warm on your hips. He’s here, he’s really fucking here.
He’s dressed in his hockey gear, and it’s clear that instead of hitting the ice with his team he’s snuck to the finally finished rink to watch your routine. 
“Don’t worry about it, baby,” he whispers, and Azriel can’t help but pull you further into him. Can’t help but to dip down and capture you in a kiss so searing that it fully takes your breath away. It’s a little awkward, because of all of the padding he has on, but the both of you make it work. He adores the blush that stains your cheeks pink when you pull away, and it really is a shame he has his cup on right now, because his erection is pressing painfully against it. “Cass and Rhys are covering for me. I couldn’t miss this.”
“Really?” Tears fill your eyes. He’s proven himself to you, time after time, that he’s here for you, even though the both of you aren’t anything more than friends who like the feeling of each other’s fingers and tongues, hands, and intimate parts. “But your game, it’s important.” 
“I’ll make it before puck drop,” Azriel reassures, “If I leave, well, now actually. I just needed to see you. Wanted to give you this.” You hadn’t noticed the jersey hanging over his arm, but when Azriel holds it up, showing off the number eight and his last name to you. “I hate to cover up your dress because you look sexy as fuck,” he murmurs, drinking you in once again. The feeling of his hot gaze makes your knees weak. “But I’m a selfish man. I can’t have anyone else looking at you like this, baby. And I want to see my name on your back.”
Fuck, does he have a way with words.
“Okay,” you breathe, letting Azriel help you into the black and purple jersey. It drapes long over your body, the fabric swallowing you, but you don’t care because the look in Azriel’s eyes is pure fire. “How do I look?” You ask innocently, giving him a twirl and reveling in his agonized groan. 
“Tell me you’re mine tonight,” He asks gruffly, pulling you back into him by the fabric of the jersey. You move into him easily, wrapping your arms around his neck. Azriel’s breath is hot across your lips, and if you weren’t in the middle of a competition, you’d let him take you right now. “We’ll both have something to celebrate.” 
Your brows furrow in confusion and Azriel grins, tilting his head to the scoreboard behind you with your scores. You currently hold the top score for the competition, with only a few skaters left to go. Holy shit you’re in first place. 
You squeal, jumping up and down in his arms. Indeed, you’ll have something to celebrate tonight, when the Bat’s take home their win, and you with your own.
“Yes, Az. I’m yours,” you whisper, accepting his kiss. “Now, go beat the Wolves. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“You better be,” Azriel says with a wink and a teasing pinch to your ass. “I need my good luck charm there to help me win.”
_________________________________________
Hockey!AU Tag (will be tagged for any hockey fic, no matter paring):
@whyonearthisyourusernamethi-blog @going-through-shit @crazylokonugget @lilah-asteria @girl-who-writes-stuff @moosemahboi @sherayuki @lyinginameadow @acourtofatboydreams @blackthorngirl @shadowsingercassia @evergreenlark @hannzoaks @bloodicka @whyshouldihaveanam3 @elle4404 @cherry-cin @quinzzelx @blackthorngirl @i-am-infinite @feerique
221 notes · View notes
mopopshop · 2 days
Note
pls make a part 2 to wildflower it was so good omg 💕💕
The Love of My Life
Part 1 <- here
Hours had passed since Emily stormed out, and you'd managed to cry yourself into a restless nap on the couch. The soft light of dawn began creeping through the windows, casting a dim glow across the living room. The TV, still playing re-runs of the Golden Girls, became a blur in the background as you slowly woke up.
The sound of the front door unlocking roused you fully. You sat up groggily, wiping at your eyes and trying to make sense of your surroundings. Emily walked in quietly, her face a mixture of exhaustion and regret. She looked at you, eyes softening when she saw the tear-streaks on your cheeks.
"Hey," she began hesitantly, her voice barely above a whisper.
"Hey," you replied, your voice still thick from sleep and emotion.
Emily walked over to the couch and sat down beside you, leaving a small space between you. She took a deep breath, staring at her hands before speaking again. "I’m.. so sorry. I can’t even begin to explain how sorry I am, I was being so unfair to you and… you did nothing for me to act the way I did. I was being a dick, baby I’m so so sorry. “
You looked at her, the hurt from last night still fresh but mixed with a glimmer of hope. "I just., why did you act like that, Emily? It’s not like you to just... shut down and lash out like that”
She sighed, running a hand through her hair. "I don’t know. Seeing you with that girl... it just brought up a lot of insecurities. I felt like I was losing you, I don’t even know why but I did and instead of talking to you about it, I let it eat me up inside."
"Emily, I’m not even mad about the argument I’m just pissed that you didn’t think you could talk to me about it. Like? We-we tell each other everything and it hurts me that you didn’t even try to-“ you cut yourself off, tears springing to your eyes once again. You shove your face in your hands as an attempt to calm yourself so you can get through your sentence but it doesn’t seem to work, once the tears fall they don’t stop. 
Emily’s heart sinks at the sight of you crying, she immediately scoots off the couch and kneels down in front of you. She places her hands on your knees, rubbing gentle circles into them.
“I know, I know, and I’m so sorry for that. I should have come to you right away, told you how I was feeling. You’re right, we do tell each other everything, and I don’t know why I didn’t this time. I let my insecurities get the best of me, and that was wrong.”
You sniffle, trying to wipe the tears from your face “I just don’t understand, Emily. I’ve never given you a reason to doubt me. Why didn’t you trust me?” 
“It’s not about you, baby it’s about me. I’ve got these insecurities and fears, and sometimes they just...take over. But that’s not fair to you. I should’ve never made that your issue.”
You sniffle again, nodding “I want this to be done with honesty, I just need reassurance that we’re gonna communicate better in the future.”
“We will, we will, we’ll get better, I’ll get better especially. I’m so so sorry, my love” she reaches for your hands, kissing the knuckles from her position on the floor “Please forgive me baby, I fucked up. I love you so much”
You roll your eyes teasingly “I love you too, I guess I forgive you”
You both chuckle and stand up, you wrap your arms around her broad shoulders as hers curl around your waist. You stand there swaying in the living room before sharing a deep kiss. 
You pull apart, pressing your foreheads together and you speak up “I don’t know about you but i’m fucking exhausted” you giggle 
“Same” she chuckles back 
“Carry me?” you put on your best puppy dog eyes, fully expecting her to carry you to your room bridal style.
She smiles and that’s the only warning you get before she throws you over her shoulder, cackling to herself.
“Emily! This is not- what I meant!” you squeal, smacking her back.
She’s still laughing to herself as she drags you to your bedroom. 
—————————————————————————
smb said they wanted emily to beg on her knees for forgiveness and i literally couldn’t get that out of my mind 😓🙏🏾
hope you guys enjoyed!
200 notes · View notes
vivwritesfics · 2 days
Note
I can’t stop thinking about just the tip jake 😭😭 any chance we can get cockwarming with them? 👉👈
No bc this is so Jake and Bug
Warnings: smut! p in v! cockwarming (duh)
Jake And Bug
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She climbed onto his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Trouble," Jake said with his hands on her hip.
He looked at her, looked at the expression on her face. She wanted something, that much was clear. Jake squeezed her hips and dragged her closer. "What do you want?" He asked, but he couldn't hide the smile on his face.
He could feel her fingers, playing with the hair at the back of his head, sending a shiver down his spin. "Want you," she said and blinked up at him, all doe eyed and sweet.
And how could Jake deny her? He freed himself from his jeans and helped her out of her underwear. She made quick work of sinking down onto his cock, content sigh leaving her lips.
"You gonna ride me, bug?" Jake asked, gently moving her.
But then she shook her head and he stopped. "Just want you inside me," she said and leaned forward, resting her head against his chest.
Now Jake had girlfriends in the past. He was in his mid thirties, of course he had. But nothing like this. He'd never had a girl that just wanted to be near him like this. "Holy shit, Bug," he whispered, arms wrapping around her as he held her close.
He could hardly breathe as she snuggled against him. She looked so fucking sweet, laying there with her hand on his chest. So sweet, but his cock was nestled inside of her.
"Jake," she whispered as she touched his cheek, felt the stubble there.
He took her hand and kissed it. "Yeah, Bug?" He asked, adjusting himself in his seat. She involuntarily bounced at that, and Jake let out a groan. Fuck, if she kept up with that he was gonna have her bent over the back of the couch.
"D'you think we could go out on a proper date?"
Jake hadn't been expecting that, not in the slightest. But, now that her dad knew, why couldn't they go on a proper date? Why couldn't he take her out to a nice dinner, pay for her to get whatever she wanted while she sat there looking pretty?
"If you wanna go on a proper date, Bug, I'll take you on a proper date," he said and kissed the top of her head. "But, you don't have any other family remembers who are gonna want to kill me, do you?"
She hummed, coy smile on her lips. "No, just my dad," she said and lifted herself up to kiss him, hips rolling slightly. "Oh, and Rooster."
A groan left Jakes lips. "Baby, please don't say that name while you're ridin' me like this."
She said it again, a laugh leaving her lips.
But that laugh soon stopped when Jake thrust his own hips up, taking control of the situation.
But she had no complaints.
TGM Taglist (OPEN): @daggersquadphantom
@mp0625
Jake and Bug: @littlebear423
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https://twitter.com/ADULT1z/status/1771716362068488554?t=7VvsSwP2-YWROrjIg27kKg&s=19
Can you please write about Konig with his wife who lactating without getting pregnant, like because of her genes. Konig definitely goes feral about that. ❤️
He would have hit the jackpot with y/n 🤭💗
König x Lactating!Wife (fem)
MDNI🔞
Master List
>cw: fem/afab, lactation, masturbation
König has his arm wrapped around you as you both snuggle, watching your favorite movie. His hand slips past the collar of your shirt and into your bra, twirling his fingers around your nipple. He gently squeezes your nipple, as he always does, but this time, a small bubble of milk came up. Without realizing it, he rubs his finger over your nipple and feels the wet sensation.
His attention instantly went from the movie to your breasts. He squeezes your nipple once more, expressing more milk out. Annoyed, you push his hand away.
“Liebling, you’re lactating? Are you pregnant?” König reaches forward for the remote to pause the movie.
“No,” a giggle carries in your voice, “I just do that.”
“We’ve been married for three years, I’d know.”
“It’s only the week before my period, when I rarely let you touch them because they’re sore.”
König just looked at you with a face of confusion but also excitement. His eyes drop to the small wet patch that has appeared on your shirt. He bites his cheek as he thinks about all the amazing things he can do now.
“Can I see it without your shirt?”
“I’m not in the mood Kö.” You pout.
“No sex. You can keep watching your movie. Please?”
When you look at him, you can’t help but to smile at how pathic he is for your breasts. “You’re lucky you’re cute.” A playful tone carries in your voice as you pull your shirt off and unhook your bra.
König watches closely as your breasts fall from their place of captivity. You should be braless 24/7. If it were up to him, he would ban them from this house. He resumes your moves as he pinches your nipple again. He sees the milk rise to the surface and smiles.
“Don’t be rough.”
“I won’t.” König whispers as he pinches your other nipple to see the milk leak out, but it squirts out and farther, spraying the coffee table. “Wow…”
König looks up at your face to make sure you aren’t feeling any discomfort. He sees you look at him with a smirk before turning back to the movie. Moving back to the breast closer to him, he squeezes hard. Milk sprays out in different angles, causing König to let out a groaning sound. The fabric of his pajamas tightening as his cock becomes erect.
He leans in, tongue reaching out and tasting some of the milk dripping from your breast. The second the sweet, warm drop touched his tongue, he instantly became addicted. His massive body closed in around you as he grabbed your breast and squeezed milk into his mouth.
Laughing, you push him. “König, you’re blocking the TV.”
“Oh, sorry.” He chuckles.
Instead of leaning over you, he lies on your lap. Your breasts dangling above his face. What a lovely view. One of his hands reaches out to squeeze your breast again. White pearly beads roll down his face and soak his hair.
König leans up slightly and latches to your breast. He sucks hard a few times, allowing your sweet tasting milk to fill his mouth before he swallows and drinks more from you. His hand assisting by squeezing your breast so tightly it gets red.
“Gentle.” You whisper and run your fingers through his blonde hair.
“Mmm, don’t stop touching my hair.” The soft tone of your words and the way your fingers feel make him shiver.
He removes his hand from your breast. Instead, he begins to pull down his blue plaid pajama bottoms. Once his cock springs free he wraps his hand around, pulling back his foreskin. With slow strokes he begins to jerk off. His mouth getting so overflowed with milk that a bit spills from the side of his mouth, causing him to moan. The sensation of your warm milk filling his mouth as you pet his hair is orgasmic in itself. He feels like a naughty step-son with his big breasted step-mom.
“Can you spray me?” His voice shaky with pleasure.
A smirk on your lips as you lean back and grab your breast. You squeeze it and watch the milk spray over his face. When his greedy mouth comes up to latch again, you pull back. His eyes open, a look of confusion on his face.
“Will you be a good boy?”
His eyes light up as he realizes what you’re doing. “Ja, I’ll be the best boy for you.” Every word is uneven as he strokes his cock in a rapid motion. “Please.”
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moneymartin · 2 days
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nika hcs? anything tbh…… maybe things she’d do in a relationship! :)
gf!nika hcs ✧.*
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warnings: suggestive content and smut at the end under the divider :p
afab!r
a/n: anonie this is so kyoot thank u 🥸 kind of long?? i got carried away 😣
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my beautiful croatian baby where do i even start with you…
this girl is the definition of ALL THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES
defff loves having conversations. could talk to you for hours on end and never ever get tired of hearing you talk
long talks = a good relationship w her
you two 100% play basketball together
promises to go easy but goes absolutely batshit crazy on you when shes playing defense
will literally break your legs if she has to just so she can score when shes on offense
when you guys go to the gym you spot her sometimes and her shirt always rides up andddddd and
ok what i’m saying is you love her abs
they’re great.
LOVES being touchy
esp in public… has no shame whatsoever and isn’t ashamed of it
keeps her hands on yours, grabs your arms, or always holds your thigh when she has the chance
also really super possessive and protective over you. if she sees someone staring at you for more than a second she’ll start to make out w you in front of them so they scram
hugs you in front of them too with her head over your shoulder so she can stare them down while you’re incredibly oblivious to what or why shes doing it 😭
she marks you up in easy to see places so ppl know that you’re taken…
also gave you a bracelet or necklace with her initial on it and a heart charm or something like that😇
when you guys cuddle shes 100% big spoon no debate abt it
loves seeing you all tired she thinks its adorbs 😢
plays with your hair while you try to fall asleep or does it while you’re on the phone trying to sleep
but if she’s in a really bad mood she’ll switch and be lil spoon
makes you scratch her back so she can relax before she sleeps
and you gladly do it!!
love love lovess doing the little things for you
if you’re sick she will cook you up something good asfk for breakfast in bed
babies you the whole time too cause she can’t help herself ☹️
when she’s at an away game and you can’t make it she has this little notepad and writes love letters on them for every day she’s gone (iykwim)
i feel like she’d spoil you too !
mention one small thing and she’s already ordering it off of amazon
if you mention an artist she’s buying you tickets to their concert already 🙇‍♂️
new clothes like every week i swear
acts of service is her thang too
will do the dishes or the laundry whenever you need her to
she doesn’t even say no either like she’ll stop whatever she’s doing and will do what you ask
drives you all over the place even if its in a wholeee different state 🥲
when you can’t make dinner she’ll do it for you
i feel like she’s also very open to trying new things
maybe new foods with you or new date ideas when you get bored of the reused ones
i think she’d LOVE roller coasters
thats probably the one place you two would never get bored of
cooks you croatian food 🥹
in summer she takes you there too and you get to go to all the places she went to when she was a kid there 🙁
loves talking abt her home country. she’s so proud of it
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soft dom. NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
your pleasure is incredibly important to her
she doesn’t care about what she feels, she cares about what you feel
def uses a strap i can tell… she’d use it most of the time
LOVES overstimming you though its something she can do for hours but will stop when it seems like too much and you’re practically sobbing 😭😭😭
rough unless asked to be soft and gentle
service top is what i mean
10000% cusses in croatian 😩
like she’ll be face deep in between your legs and she’s mumbling curses under her breath and its SOOO HOT
when she tops too her face will be right next to your ear and every time she moves she’s grunting something in croatian
honestly i feel like she’d be a scratcher if you ever switched it up
marks and dots of blood ALLLLLL OVER YOUR BACK
you try to show them off afterwards so she knows how pathetic she ended up becoming 😇
MY GOD
I NEEDDDD HER
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hotpinkstars · 2 days
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HIIII I JUST READ YOUR BOOTHILL IDEA ABOUT PREGNANCY AND I AM WELL FED 😭 i love how angsty it is. oh boy i'm sure struggles a lot during his s/o's pregnancy. like...it has lots of cry and self-conflict because he may thinking that he isn't helping his s/o. there gonna be small arguments and misunderstandings. it's hard for the both of them and the baby. 🥹
ohhhh yes. yup. decided to take a real angsty route with this one. I added some mentions of his actual backstory here, bc my og one was written before his backstory was released lols
Boothill definitely cries during your whole entire pregnancy. He also has a lot of bad thoughts about himself during it, too. 
At first, he tries to hide it, and either subtly cry, or just simply wait until you’re no longer in the room or the house. He doesn’t want you to know that he’s not happy because of the state he’s in. 
He used to be human, he used to be flesh, and most importantly, he once had a daughter of his own, and that's what crushes him the most. He fears so much that he’s almost going to replace her, even though he knows deep down in his heart that it most definitely wouldn’t be able to happen. 
He also feels so bad about not being able to do normal human things for your during your pregnancy :(((( he knows how much you want to be able to be soft and intimate, to take baths and be able to have a cozy massage and just a cozy person around in general, and he’s the exact opposite of that. He doesn’t even think he deserves the husband title anymore.
He literally once asked you why you’re still with him and not someone else. You explained that you loved him and you wanted to be with him, and even then he never really expressed the way he felt about himself to you but you could sort of see it in his eyes. He didn’t like the way he was and the fact that he can’t be what he refers to as a “proper dad” to his kid. 
He knows it’s hard on you, too, and he also knows that you’re catching onto his harsh thoughts, and you’re catching on fast. It caused an argument a few times, on how you’re hurt that he’s not expressing his emotions, he doesn’t want to, it turns into a “do you not trust me or something?” conflict on your end, and a “I just don’t know what to say without hurting you” conflict on his end. Misunderstanding that likely won’t just dissipate. 
There was one argument that you both had when you were nearing pretty close to your due date, and he decided he was going to walk out midway through and not come back for about a week. For some reason, he chose a petty route, leaving you anxious and super betrayed, considering he refused to answer his phone, too.
The argument was over something that seemed incredibly stupid, if you both must say so yourselves. He was, once again, insecure, and he wouldn’t tell you why. That was what bothered you- did he not trust you enough? Did he seriously not want to be a part of this baby's life? Why else would he just walk out?
To say it made you super anxious, scared, and lonely was an understatement. You were left with the thought that you’d have to give birth alone, and go back to your original game plan that you already mentally set up. You thought he genuinely left you.
That was, until he walked back into the house on a random afternoon that next week. He ran up to you and apologized, allowing you to cry it out in his steel arms. He felt so horrible, and he vowed to you to never, ever do that again.
He tries to start letting you in on his troubles from that point on, but there still seems to him like there's a barrier blocking his words from coming out. Sometimes, he just blames it on his synesthesia beacon, which seems to work for now. 
He also lets you see him cry more often, but that stops when you give birth. He doesn’t need you to be more overwhelmed than you already will end up being.
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panqueen · 2 days
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Worries
Aaron Hotchner x FEM BAU Reader
Warning: Mentions of death, accidents, panicked Hotch.
Use of Y/n: Your name and L/n: Last name.
—————————————————————
Aaron Hotchner stands on a sidewalk across from a crime scene with his phone up to his ear mumbling to himself worriedly. Garcia sees his panic and walks over with a smile.
“You okay Boss?” she asks concerned.
“She’s not picking up” he grumbles panic setting in when he only gets Y/n’s answering machine.
“Who?” she asks confused.
“L/n she’s not picking up, dammit!” he sighs putting his phone in his pocket starting to pace.
“It’s alright Hotch I’ll try to reach her” she assures him with a smile and rushes to her computer to see what she can do.
Hotch continues to pace bringing his hands over his chin scratching at the stubble his usual nervous tick. The team stand further away watching him with confusion.
Hundreds of thoughts are rushing through Hotch’s mind. You could be hurt, the unsub could have got to you, you could be stuck in traffic for all he knows but it doesn’t matter because only panic fills his mind.
He looks over towards the entrance when he sees you walk through with an apoplectic smile. He immediately rushes over looking you over for any indication that you’re hurt.
“Where were you?” his voice strict.
“Sorry I’m late my car wouldn’t start so I had to take the metro” she apologizes.
“Something could have happened, I thought-we all thought something happened” he raises his voice slightly.
“I’m sorry it won’t happen again” she nods looking down embarrassed at the eyes watching them.
———
Later that day after the case was solved Y/n sits at her desk finishing her paperwork and more since Hotch gave her extra for what happened earlier, she says her goodbyes to the team as they leave.
It’s only Hotch and Y/n left in the building finishing up the paperwork. Once she’s done she takes it to his office knocking lightly not wanting to disturb him.
“I finished the paperwork, I’ll just leave it here” she places it on his desk turning around to leave.
As she’s about to walk out she throws caution to the wind and turns back around to him with an annoyed expression.
“How come when Spencer is late because he takes the metro you don’t care, and just brush it off but when I’m a few minutes late because my car didn’t start you give me extra paperwork and yell at me?” she asks growing frustrated.
He looks up with a frustrated frown and sighs leaning back in his chair rubbing his chin looking at her.
“Well-why?” she asks impatiently.
“I called you multiple times and you didn’t pick up so unless your phone is broken or dead there’s no excuse” his tone sharpens.
“Whatever- good night Hotch” she turns to leave.
“I was worried” he stops her in her place with three quiet words.
“I’m fine” she assures.
“But you could have been hurt or worse, Y/n with the work we do it’s crucial I know you’re safe” he stands up walking towards her.
“You don’t react like this with the others” she looks at him confused.
“The others are not you” he stands in front of her holding her elbows pulling her slowly towards him.
“Why am I different?” she quietly asks feeling her chest tighten in anticipation.
“Because you’re you- the only person who makes me feel as panicked and anxious as I do when I think of something happening to you” his tone softens as he looks down at her.
He leans down close to her face. She feels his breath on her cheek and leans closer into his touch.
“You are the most infuriating woman I’ve ever known, yet I can’t seem to stay away from you” he whispers against her lips.
She looks up into his eyes and presses their lips together. He groans into her mouth as she deepens the kiss not wanting to let him go.
It’s safe to say after that kiss Aaron Hotchner worried everyday for you and has made sure to always have contact whenever need be.
———
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snoopyearss · 3 days
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Hi ♡
I read some of your works and they were amazing! I just wanted to ask... Can I make a request? If yes, I had one thought in mind...
How would Nanami Kento react on his s/o who never experienced an orgasm while having sex? Always left unsatisfied with other men. Would he be such a gentleman and help her to experience the best bed experience of her life? ♡
Nanami making you come for the first time
Omg omg omgggg yes yes!! I love this idea
It started with the both of you feeling on each other subtly (if you can call it that), which led to him carrying you to his bedroom. He lies you on your back and starts kissing down from your jaw to your collarbone, whispering dirty ears in your ear. “I’ve been craving you,” he would moan in your ear.
You and him have been dating for quite a while now, enough time for you two to start getting comfortable with sex. Usually when it came to dating men, they were a disappointment in that field. The number of orgasms you had to fake is absolutely ridiculous. But you got so good at it that they didn’t notice. You figured it was just going to be one of those times. No big deal, you’d just pull out the rose toy after he falls asleep, you thought to yourself.
“You look so beautiful baby, I can’t wait to see what you look like when you come all over my cock.” He purred as he took off your top and skirt you were wearing. You chuckled at his comment, completely forgetting that he was right in front of you.
He stopped what he was doing to drown at you, “What was that?” Your eyes shut out of sheer embarrassment. “Did you just laugh?” You didn’t respond.
“Y/n.” He sternly said. It made the hairs on your body stand up and a wave of arousal ran through you. Slowly, you opened you eyes and was faced to face with a shirtless, muscular man.
“I-I..”
“What? Do you think I’m incapable of making you come?”
“N-no, I just..no one’s ever really made me..” You don’t know what came over you, but when it came to Nanami speaking so sternly, it turned you on. “No one’s ever made you come?” He sat down next to you after you shook your head no.
“Darling, I feel like this is something you should’ve told me.” He lightly scolded. “I know, ‘M sorry. It’s just embarrassing.” You mumbled. “That could never be embarrassing. That just means they weren’t catering to your needs.” You remained silent. He got up and got on his knees before you, spreading your legs a bit.
“What-“
“I’m going to show you what you were missing.”
Nanami spreads your legs and softly blows on your clit causing you to twitch. You clenched the sheets in anticipation.
“Let me know if you feel uncomfortable, and I’ll stop. Okay?” He reassured and you nodded in response.
He began to massage your folds, getting you more malleable to play with. It made you relax under his touch which is exactly what he wanted. He used his hand to massage you while he brought his lips to your clot and lightly sucked on it.
“Oh fuck..” you breathed out.
Nanami continued his same movements, then replacing his hand with his mouth all together. The way your breath hitched in your chest and the way you were fidgeting around, you knew something about this was different.
“O-oh my- Kento..fuckk,” you moaned now running your hands through his blonde hair. “Oh my god it feels s-so good.”
“Yeah, it feels good baby? You want me to add another finger?”
“Yes yes yes yes please,” you chanted. He inserted another finger, curling it inside and hitting that spot that it takes you minutes at a time to hit. You moaned louder this time, legs shaking on either side of his face.
Nanami looks up and watches your face contorts in pleasure as you get close you your orgasm. “Kento…im- im-“
“Let go for me pretty girl, make a mess all over my fingers. Let me taste you..there you go..that’s my girl.” He talks you through the whole wave, using his other arm to hold you down to prevent you from jolting around. The moans flowed out of your mouth like a stream of water. He continued to pump his fingers in you until you came down.
“Holy shit,” you breathed out covering your eyes.
“How was that?” He kissed up and down your thighs. You could only nod.
“Think I can make you come around my cock now?”
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cookie-crumblr · 3 days
Text
Chubby F! Housewife Reader X M!Yandere Streamer OC Jasper
Part 1?
(idk i might continue it?? should i? i know it’s more niche)
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MINORS DNI
CW: Chubby F!reader, reader has a vagina, reader referred to as she/her, cheating themes, reader in a dress, pet names for reader(darling, ) not smutty yet! slow burn possibly
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keep thinking about a chubby housewife reader to like a really shitty but rich man, and they move next door to Jasper………………. MMMMM
Anything in Red reader isn’t aware of
Your husband moved you both into a beautiful mansion in a gated community. It’s amazing, and everything you could ever need, he’s providing.
You fell in love with him a year and a half ago.
It’s not like he lied, but you wouldn’t have married him had you known what he was really like.
He drinks all day and complains all night, and when he fucks you, he finishes in a few seconds. And that’s when he does fuck you! He’s hardly ever even touching you let alone getting it in.
You are standing outside overseeing the movers as they take boxes and furniture into your brand new house. your skirt dances against your legs in the warm, gentle breeze.
Your husband swirls an amber liquid in a short crystal glass, watching you from the doorway. When you wave excitedly, he skulks back into the mansion.
Your heartstrings tug painfully.
He’s taken you far away from all of your loved ones, somewhere where you’re all alone and afraid… And he can’t even be there for you at least little bit? Before a stinging tear fully can form-
“Evenin’” You hear a lazy male voice from nearby, and spin toward your hedges. There’s a wrought gate between yours, and your neighbors’ yard directly… The old neighbors must’ve been their friend. A young looking guy stands on the other side of it, waving kindly to you. His posture is easy, one hand in his jean pocket, the other up in the air, his head tipped back exposing his pale neck. Long black hair frames his face, loaded with piercings. He looks out of place, but perfectly at home standing out.
You approach, figuring that your husband can lead the movers just fine on his own. You don’t notice your slight pout, but Jasper finds it adorable, he bites his lip, eyeing you up.
“Sorry I didn’t bake ya a pie, didn’t know the place would be sold so soon.” He laughs and lazily scratches the back of his head, his shirt pulls up revealing his hip bone.
“Why? ‘s it haunted? OooOo” You wave your fingers to mock something spooky.
He laughs at your cute demeanor, “Eh maybe, last owner did die,” he shrugs.
“Oh my, I’m sorry, I didn’t know….” You idly run your fingers over the cold, slightly bumpy textured gate.
“Nothing to be sorry for, didn’t know them” He shrugs.
“Oh phew! I thought— Anyway!” You shake your hands and head to reset the convo, “What’s up? why’d you call me over here?” You tilt your head and fold your hands in front of you.
“I was just greeting my pretty new neighbor, that’s all,” He grins.
“Oh stop! I’m married!” You shyly laugh and turn your head so that he can’t see you’re flustered.
“happily?” His grin grows as does his suspicion.
“Oh!” You think of an excuse to quickly leave, “I think the movers are calling me!” You rush off back to at least pretend to delegate again.
His brow raises curiously as he smiles after you, watching your curves sway as you walk away.
The stranger watches you for a few minutes longer, and you feel his eyes on you, but you don’t dare turn around and encourage him.
You are a good wife. Regardless of who you ended up marrying. You stomp, steadfast in your decision.
He chuckles before walking back to his home.
~
Inside you finish setting the table with the house workers, and arranging the flowers on all the marble pedestals around the dining room. Your husband is having some business partners over for dinner.
As the door rings you rush to answer the door, and an employee beats you to it, taking their coat and everything.
You aren’t really sure what you should be doing… And your chest tightens with nerves.
“What are you doing out here? You should be with me.” Edward grabs your elbow and drags you along. He’s being rather rough but you can’t help feel a little grateful to be lead. It doesn’t stop your eyes burning in embarrassment.
He sets you down in the seat next to his at the head, and your heart flutters with pride, emotional whiplash aside.
A few men enter the dining room one after the other, and then dinner is served. you’re dissociating for most of it, just nodding along to their dull conversation, until your husband’s hand clasps around your thigh. “Huh?”
“You’re excused now, darling,” he has a cold look in his eye that startles you.
“What?” What he said hurt your feelings, he doesn’t want you around now? did you do something wrong?
“Leave, let us grown ups talk now” He laughs with his business friends joining in.
You feel that far too familiar sting in your eyes, how could he!? that’s so embarrassing! You’re his wife.
Doing your best, you stand without making a scene and give them all your most polite and proper departing smile.
~
It’s cold on the patio. Your evening dress doesn’t cover very much and where it does, the fabric is cool. You’re quick to shiver, but you remain.
There’s a security camera above you and you feel watched, so you decide to go for a walk around the block instead of staying stationary. Maybe that will warm you up a little too.
You creep out the front gate, feeling like you’re a teen again, sneaking out when you aren’t supposed to… But this is your home! you aren’t disallowed from taking a walk!
“Hah!” You laugh to yourself, how silly of a feeling you just had.
As you round a corner adorned by an iron lamp post with glowing twin lanterns, you start dwelling more and more on your predicament. You already felt lonesome before, where Edward had made you feel special, and told you you’d never be alone again. Yet here you are, walking down the dim street, alone.
An engine coming towards you snaps you out of your thoughts, you turn to see a large van slowing down as it approaches you. Your heart thumps and your mind races before the driver side window rolls down revealing your neighbor’s laid back, and smirking face.
You let out a shaky sigh, “oh goodness you scared me for a second!” followed by a nervous laugh.
“You alright? Want a ride?” He asks.
“Oh no, don’t worry about me! I was just taking a stroll,” You let your words hang, wanting to accept but being a little too frightened or nervous to outright accept.
“C’mon, we can have some coffee or tea at my place, ‘sides, i’d feel terrible if i just left ya out here at this time, sure it’s gated but a tasty lookin’ treat like you’d get snatched up in a heartbeat.”
Your face feels hot but you nod and mangange to get out an “mhm!”
He watches you round the front of his van, and reaches his body over the center console to open the passenger door for you.
He offers his hand to help you up, when you take it, it’s cold! “What have you been up to? You feel like death! here!” You bring his hand up to your face and blow warm air over his knuckles.
Crimson fills his cheeks for the moment and is swift to clear back out before you can really admire it.
You pull back away a little embarrassed yourself, you aren’t sure why you did that to a stranger! “Oh! I don’t even know your name! I’m Y/N!” You stick your hand back out in offer to shake his.
He takes it, “Jasper,” a small smile tugs at his lips.
~
The drive isn’t long, but you realize how far from home you actually were, and wonder what he had been doing to find you.
You step out onto his driveway and anxiously look through the gate connecting your yards. It feels as though this is something you really shouldn’t be doing… But this Jasper guy could be a friend, and then you won’t be so lonely anymore!
Your home is still lit up inside, so you’re assuming they’re still talking in there.
Jasper’s space on the inside is dimly lit, but brightly coloured retro fantasy, all soft shapes with rounded sides. Mostly pinks and purples. Very vaporwave. The kitchen tiles, though the typical black and white checker board, warp and look like waves on the floor. Plants cover most all the surfaces.
He makes you your preferred tea, or coffee, he doesn’t make himself a cup of either. Instead he grabs a pale blue, and silver can from the fridge.
“Oh i see how it is,” You say with sarcasm.
“I figured you’d need to warm up,” A smile crosses his lips that has your body feeling hot.
You sip your drink nonchalantly.
“So what were you doing out there by yourself?”
“My husband— Nevermind, sorry. I shouldn’t talk bad about my husband behind his back…”
“Well I know something we could do if you don’t wanna go back yet…” his brow raises in a challenge.
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gh0stsp1d3r · 1 day
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new to your blog and i have to say every fic is just 🤌🏼 chefs kiss lmao
have a little request !
jj maybank x kook!reader where they’re in a secret relationship and he goes to midsummers with her 🫢
ahhh! welcome!! im so so glad you like my stuff (: <3 i love this request so much
ℳ𝒾𝒹𝓈𝓊𝓂𝓂ℯ𝓇𝓈
Masterlist
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Your mom swirled the glass in her hand as she laughed with a coworker. She had hosted a dinner party, for all her work friends, and you were hating everything about your life right now.
You internally groaned when one of her coworkers turned to you and began to talk.
“So, uh, y/n, who are you planning on going to midsummers with?” One of them said, flashing a smile at you from across the table.
“Uh, no one… right now.” You lied, giving them a small smile.
“Oh, well, isn’t that perfect? My son- actually doesn’t have a date yet, and me and your mom were just talking about how cute you two would be together! Maybe you’d wanna… meet him?”
Your face fell, but you just gave her a false smile, picking at your food with your fork as you gave her a small nod.
“Wonderful!” She exclaimed, making you bite back a remark and stand up.
“Where are you going?” Your mom asked with a furrowed brow.
“I’m gonna eat in my room. I’m not feeling good.” You told her, picking up the plate and practically running to your room.
You put the plate on your bed, shutting the door and grabbing your phone, immediately opening up JJs contact.
“How would you like to go to midsummers with me?” You asked him, watching the three dots pop up quickly.
“Thought you said that your mom wouldn’t like it.”
You thought about your response for a moment. “I don’t care, Pleaseeeeee?”
“You know damn well I wouldn’t say no to you”
You smiled at that, sighing in relief as you leaned back in your bed and held your phone.
“I know, see you tmr? We can go get you a suit or you can borrow one of my brothers.”
“Sure, and I’ll just borrow your brothers”
“I think I’m gonna go to sleep, goodnight jj.”
“goodnight” he told you, putting his phone down and looking up at the ceiling.
“Who the hells got you smiling like that?” John B asked from the doorway, abruptly stopping.
“Jesus Chr- can’t just sneak up on me like that, dude!” Jj jumped, hiding his phone away as he spoke. John B snickered, laughing as he walked away.
———-
The day of Midsummers, JJ stood at your door, rapping on the door with his headphones hung around his neck, hair disheveled and face surprisingly shaved clean.
He looked around the patio, picking up some decorations he saw, and smiling when he saw a little stone with your name written on it, something you did when you were younger.
“Oh, Jake, she’s just been-“ your mom opened the door, starting to talk before she looked up to see not Jake, but JJ.
Her eyebrows furrowed, and she was taken aback at the boy.
“Hello, ma’am.” He said, putting the stone down and looking at your mom. “Is she here?”
She looked him up and down, a slight disgusted look visible. “Sorry, I think you have the wron-“
“JJ!” You shouted, smiling as you stepped down the stairs. His eyes widened at the sight of you, he swears he could feel his heart beating out of its chest.
You smiled and hugged him, pushing your mom and wrapping your arms around him. He smiled, closing his eyes and hugging you back, leaving light kisses on your neck.
“You look…” he started when he pulled away. “Breathtaking.” He spoke, his words making you beam.
“What a romantic.” You teased him. “You look great! I told you it would look good on you, jayj!” You said, putting your hands on his suit jacket and fixing it.
“Thanks. You ready?” He asked you, you nodded and began to turn before your mom spoke up.
“Wait, you’re going to midsummers… with him?” Your mom interrupted the moment, making both of you look at her now.
You furrowed your eyebrows. “Yeah. Is that okay?”
“It’s… what about Jake?”
“I told Jake that he was a nice guy but I already have a boyfriend.” You shrugged.
She was stunned at this information, her beloved, sweet, daughter was dating a dirty pogue. At least that’s how she saw it.
“It was nice meeting you, Ms. L/n.” He called out as you both turned around, a smug smile on his face as he looked at you.
You sighed, shaking your head. “I’m fucking grounded after this. I know it.”
At the actual party, everyone seemed shocked to see you all glammed up, but with a pogue boy hanging on your arm the whole time.
The two of you seemed like opposites, your pink dress flowed around the floor, while he had a baseball cap on, looking like he threw the suit on two minutes before he came. He pretty much did.
“You okay, Jayj?” You asked him quietly when you both sat down.
“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”
You looked around, everyone judging him loudly and quietly. You frowned and turned back to him.
“Everyone’s looking. I can understand if-“
“Let them.” He shrugged it off. “I don’t give a fuck about any of their snobby ass opinions,” he said with a small smile, not so subtly flicking one of the couples off.
You let your worries dissolve with his words about the stares and the whispers, especially when you saw JJ looked at you like that. Like you hung the stars themselves, like you were the only girl in the world.
“Do you fancy a dance, milady?” JJ asked you suddenly in a posh accent, holding his hand out.
You gasped, holding your hand to your heart. “Why yes I do, good sir.” You played along, a smile playing on your lips as he kissed your hand and took yours in his.
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literaila · 1 day
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Hey, I don’t know what you make of love triangles but I’ve always wondered how Typical Family would look like if reader once had a “not so obvious” crush on Geto and the two almost looked like a couple except Geto only saw her as a friend and Satoru doesn’t actually start to “see” reader until he sees how broken up she is after Geto’s betrayal. Kind of looks like the thing between Sasuke/Sakura/Naruto (ahem Except Sakura takes the less toxic path). You don’t have to indulge in this nor does it have to be canon to your original story but I’m just curious 🌚
now i dont think satoru was ever jealous of suguru because 1. suguru is all-knowing and 2. suguru is a literal big brother to you and there is only platonic admiration there.
but. you know who satoru is jealous of? nanami kento.
okay, there’s really no arguing—the boy needs a haircut.
he also needs to stop letting you hang off of him, and taking you out to dinner (because you find his interest in food a bit bizarre, and funny), and making you laugh all of the goddamn time.
satoru may be the strongest, the prettiest—but he has the disadvantage of being older than you. it’s not often yaga sends the two of you somewhere together—or any of the first years with the seconds.
and it’s just not fair, okay?
the only reason you even train with satoru is because he’s the only person who can see your technique, the only one who has a fair fight.
in fact, the only reason satoru gets to hang out with you at all is because you like everyone else. your classmates like suguru and shoko—and tolerate satoru.
and maybe it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth when he sees you standing a little bit too close to nanami. maybe it makes him feel like his world could collapse—disappear—right in front of him.
he does not want to endure being subjected to your schoolgirl crush on a boy who can’t even be bothered to cut his hair. and what would you see in him anyway? are brown eyes preferable to his outer-worldly blue ones? is satoru’s hair just not yellow enough?
…is nanami your type?
all of this to say, it’s definitely not satoru’s fault that he just accidentally threw nanami across the courtyard.
it’s the boys fault, obviously, for daring you to wish him good luck, for saying something so funny before they began that his smug face is still so pleased from making you laugh.
it’s not satoru’s fault.
but he does realize his mistake when instead of aweing over him like he’d wanted—you rush to nanami.
satoru is standing there, a rare frown on his face, looking down at his hands like they’re going to give him some answers.
“are you taking your anger out on the first years, now?” suguru asks, dryly, looking over to where you’re checking nanami’s pupillary response.
“don’t know what you’re talking about,” satoru grumbles, feeling even more betrayed.
what does that kid offer than he can’t?
“you know you could just talk to her, right? you don’t need to beat nanami up to prove a point.”
“if he wasn’t so weak i wouldn’t have—“
and then you’re walking back to them, nanami’s arm slung over your back as you half carry him. his face is already puffing up. “where’s shoko?”
you give him a look with unbridled rage. satoru can already feel the scolding coming on.
“i think she had a meeting with yaga, or something,” satoru answers, giving you his best innocent look.
it does nothing.
suguru inspects nanami. “do you need help?”
“no,” you frown at the boy hanging on you and sigh. “i’m taking him to the infirmary. i don’t know where yu went, but if you see him will you tell him that we left?”
“sure.”
suguru nudges satoru. “uh, yeah. we’ll tell him.”
you nod sternly at them both. “thank you.”
and then you’re walking away, even closer to nanami than you were before.
satoru is already pouting. it doesn’t take much.
“you’re stupid, you know that?”
“he asked me to—!”
“he wanted to learn. not get a concussion for no reason.”
satoru waves a hand. “he wont even remember it tomorrow.”
suguru is smirking at him, looking like he knows something that satoru doesn’t. “because he has brain damage?”
“because shoko will heal him.”
suguru only shakes his head. “i’m going to find haibara. he probably got lost again.”
satoru nods but remains there, with his arms crossed.
seriously, nanami kento of all people?
*
meanwhile, you’re lugging kento up onto one of the tables in the infirmary, feeling like you should’ve forced gojo to carry him the whole way.
you would’ve—if the sight of him didn’t make you want to rip your hair out.
…for a multitude of reasons, of course.
“okay. you okay? how’s your head?”
“bruised.”
you snort, pushing his hair back so you can see the black eye that’s already developing. at least it won’t get the chance to turn purple, you think.
“i’m sorry. i don’t know why gojo did that.”
kento laughs, leaning again away from your hand. you wonder if it’s his possible concussion, or if what you said was really all that funny.
you’ve only gotten him to laugh like… three times.
“you can tell him that i’m not interested in stealing you away.”
“gojo?”
he nods.
“why would i tell him that?”
nanami’s eyes closed. he looks like he’s aged years in the last hour. “are you naturally ignorant, or are you trying to distract me?”
you cross your arms. “what do you mean?”
“whatever’s going on between you and that white haired freak, just leave me out of it.”
“going on? there’s nothing going on. gojo is just an idiot—“
“seems like it’s spreading.”
“are you sure you’re okay, ken? i think you’re going crazy.”
nanami sighs. you can practically see his eyes rolling under his eyelids. “where’s shoko?”
you look around, biting your lip. “i don’t know… i thought she’d be here by now. i’ll go check the classrooms.”
he nods.
“don’t fall asleep, okay? i mean it.”
“just hurry.”
and you turn around the door, more questions running through your head than when you walked in.
*
satoru is still standing there, contemplating his life choices (of which there have been few) when you’re running back across the courtyard.
but you slow as you near him, your eyes filled with intent.
and maybe he was waiting for this.
“you asshole,” you say, hitting him on the shoulder—which he allows because any moment of you touching him is one that satoru wants to savor. “what were you thinking?”
he stands there, completely still, for just a moment more. you’re here now. with him. who’s with nanami then?
still, he shrugs. “i just forgot how weak he was.”
“oh, you forgot? you forgot that it was training and kento isn’t some special grade curse you—“
“is he dead?”
“what? why would you say that?”
“if he was really a special grade curse he’d already be dead.”
“you’re so arrogant,” you grind out, shaking your head at him. “and reckless! kento probably has a concussion.”
“then why aren’t you looking after him?”
“i—what?”
“why are you here yelling at me,” satoru gestures to himself, a grin forming on his face. “instead of making sure that he’s okay?”
“i—“ your mouth opens. then closes. “i went to go look for shoko and i didn’t think that you…” you shake your head again, frowning.
satoru just smiles at you.
he likes you a bit flushed and angry anyway.
“stop smiling at me like that!”
“what? i’m not allowed to smile now?”
“no. after today you’re not allowed to do anything. you’re lucky i’m such a good person or else you’d be six feet under—“
“you expect me to believe that you would actually kill me?”
“if i didn’t have a moral obligation, yes.”
satoru laughs.
“shut up,” you say, hitting him again. “i’m angry enough that i could do it.”
he shakes his head, slinging his arm around your shoulder. he has to make up for all of the time that nanami got to cling to you—has to repossess this, or he might go insane.
“that’s not why i’m laughing.”
“get off of me.”
“you wouldn’t kill me,” satoru whispers, right in your ear, delighting in a shiver that you can’t hold back. “even if you could. you like me too much to do it.”
you push him off of you, scowling. “i do not like you—“ you insist, only slightly breathless. “you just beat up my friend for no reason.”
“friend?”
you scoff, crossing your arms and looking up at satoru like he’s a demon sent straight from hell—just to torment you.
have you ever looked at nanami like that?
no, satoru thinks, you haven’t.
“yes, friend,” you repeat, rolling your eyes, “i know you’re unfamiliar with the concept but really. why is everyone acting so weird today?”
satoru’s grin is almost blinding. there’s no one else you get so worked up over. no one else who you would pause just to yell at.
“c’mon,” he says, instead of answering. he pushes himself back onto you, pulling you close by your waist. “i’ll look for shoko with you. you can tell me about how much you like me on the way.”
“gojo satoru, i will still murder you—“
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