#I WAS THERE I WAS WITNESSING THIS

[shibusawaz]

"i was written by dostoevsky" "i was written by austen" where are my girls who were written by camus. who here is searching for a reunion with something they can't quite define, but seems like the only desirable good. who here, for lack of a better name, calls it peace (jean tarrou is literally me irl)

#babe wake up its time to think about camus again #(wilted shriveled voice) yes honey #THE PLAGUE MAKES ME FEEL EMOTIONS I CANT QUITE DESCRIBE. I WAS IN FUCKING ORAN #WHILE READING THIS #I WAS THERE I WAS WITNESSING THIS #albert camus #im screaming crying throwing up

[kholran]

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president...and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

#i have a witness to prove it happened

[forestofsprites]

i think that sometimes the best thing that you can do is remind yourself that there are beaches. lakes, rivers, and ponds. there are forests. little woods and meadows. there are canyons. gullies and mountain cliffs. there are rainy days. dry spells and scorching blue skies. that the world turns. changes as much as it repeats. that feeling slow today won't stop tomorrow's high tide. won't make july's blackberries any less ripe

#i do think there's a comfort in knowing the world won't stop for me #that me feeling off kilter doesn't mean spring will come any slower #i suppose. when life feels out of our hands. out of control #the planet keeps doing its thing #and we will be there to meet it #to engage w it. to witness it. to make changes where and when we can #too much change lately!!!!!! too much life out of my hands!!! #thoughts

[renaissanceousia]

one of the most intimate scenes i've ever read i'm so serious

#rereading pjo #literally screaming crying and throwing up #likeeeee the soulmatism of it all #pls pls pls give me season 5 so i can witness this with my own eyes #percabeth #percy jackson #annabeth chase #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo series #pjo #pjo spoilers #pjo fandom

[mobius-m-mobius]

#the Nowhere Man who waits and the God of Stories who watches

#mobius #loki #lokius #mcuedit #lokiedit #marveledit #loki spoilers #owen wilson #tom hiddleston #owenwilsonedit #marvel #dianagifs #😩😭 #what... in the most tragic of romances did i just witness #gotta rewatch tomorrow but cannot BELIEVE how okay i am with everything atm??? #their story clearly isn't done their burden is obviously going on without each other and they exist fundamentally connected #they've lost everything but being able to see mobius every step of the way is enough for loki to make the sacrifice #and mobius left for his timeline with no other purpose than to make sure loki could do just that #now they're lost without each other?? the only thing mobius can do is exist for a moment in loki's creation i'm UNWELL #god this is the star crossed angst that's gonna keep me going for the rest of my LIFE they're my everything #loki s2 spoilers

[ocdhuacheng]

So laios and fallin have been ostracized by society since they were children, Marcille has lifelong grief from constantly outliving her loved ones that leads her to dark magics, kabru’s village was destroyed by monsters, senshi and mithrun both have horror movie level backstories, izutsumi was sold as a freak show attraction, and then there’s chilchuck, who is a normal ass divorced middle aged man. And somehow he’s the most shady and secretive out of all of them

Edit can y’all please let me live I didn’t make this post bc I think chilchuck doesn’t have his own trauma or doesn’t experience racism or that being a union boss is a walk in the park or whatever I made it because him lying that he cheated on his wife to get the others to stop asking about his family was funny as fuck. Come on.

#edit: GUYS THIS IS A JOKE POST STOP TAKING IT SERIOUSLYYYYYYYYY #WHY DO YALL GOTTA BE 'well actually☝🤓' #LIKE I KNOW ALLAT ALREADY.. I SIMPLIFIED IT FOR COMEDIC VALUE LET ME LIVEEEEEE #anyway. #divorced father of three and he acts like hes about to be put into witness protection #literally obsessed with him #.txt #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #<- just to be safe for anime onlies

[foldingfittedsheets]

In one misfortunate year I ended up getting into several car accidents. It cemented my general fear and anxiety in cars, because in each case I was either in the car but not driving or driving safely when suddenly something hit me.

One was my ex driving in an unfamiliar city and cutting someone off on accident that resulted in a sideswipe. Another was getting rear ended when I came to a required stop.

The last was when I had a green arrow at an intersection. I turned and was smashed into by someone running a red light, T-boning my little car.

Dazed and in shock I tottered out of the car to behold a crusty older man eating a donut step out of the offending vehicle. A fire truck arrived to block us off from traffic since my car could no longer move under its own power.

“Were you on your way home from work?” The firemen asked me.

I shook my head, struggling to focus on them, “No,” I said vaguely, “I was on my way home from volunteering at the animal shelter.”

In an instant they were closing ranks around me, glaring at the ambivalent donut man who would dare to hit a tiny frail angel who volunteered at the animal shelter. They asked if I needed to get anything out of my car. I did.

“It’s… uh. It’s a little weird though.”

They gestured for me to proceed. I grabbed a bag with snacks and books and filled it with things I couldn’t just leave in my car. Last out I pulled my cutlass.

“Is that a sword?!”

It was. They were instantly like giant puppy dogs, excited and delighted but trying to mind their manners. The bravest said, “Can we…?” I held out the sword. They whooped with delight, unsheathing and marveling at it.

“Why do you have that in your car?”

“I honestly don’t remember, it’s just a fun thing to have at a party now.”

“Is your wrist okay?”

My shock was wearing off and I realized I was cradling my wrist to my chest. “Oh.” I rummaged into my bag and pulled out a wrist brace.

“Wh….why do you already have that?” I was starting to confuse the firemen. I volunteered with cats, had a sword offhand, and kept a wrist brace in my car bag.

“Sometimes I try to hold books in a way that sprains my wrist? So I have this in my car just in case.”

They stared at me. Maybe, like my wife, they assumed it was for masturbation induced injuries. They handed my sword back as the tow truck arrived and thanked me for letting them play with it. They gave donut man one last glare and drove their big truck away.

#ramblies #ffs foibles #story #writing #I ended up not having a witness and there was no cameras so my insurance didn’t back me #I’m willing to bet any of those nice firemen would’ve lied for me if I’d thought to ask

[cholvoq]

“Oh Al, such a gentleman.”

I really like to draw him if you couldn’t tell—

#hazbin #hazbin art #hazbin hotel #hazbin redesign #alastor #hazbin alastor #the thirst i witnessed on tiktok is beyond anything i’ve seen #was it bait? yes. yes it was.

[hansoeii]

Do you think of me?

#I am not ready to witness these two longing for each other in season 2 it's gonna ruin me #stede writing love letters to ed while on his way to win him back #and ed stealing the wedding toppers and imagining marrying stede during quiet and vulnerable hours #yeah I'm very much not ready #these two are my favorite thing in the world #our flag means death #our flag means death fanart #our flag means death 2 #gay pirates #ofmd #ofmd 2 #stede bonnet #edward teach #ofmd fanart #ofmd 2 fanart #david jenkins #rhys darby #taika waititi #my art #fanart

[mylordshesacactus]

So my family has a Gay Pirate Plate.

Stay with me.

We do not know how the hell the Gay Pirate Plate was first acquired. This being a point of contention is actually pretty plot-relevant; the saga of the Gay Pirate Plate began with my grandmother and her sister, who, for some ungodly reason, both BADLY wanted the Gay Pirate Plate and believed it to be rightfully theirs.

I should back up, firstly, to establish: The Gay Pirate Plate is the cheapest, tackiest, ugliest plate in existence.

It is in no way a collector’s item. It is physically impossible for it to complement anyone’s decor, because the colors in it are garish. It’s just a ceramic plate with a gay pirate painted on it, and the painting is, this cannot be emphasized enough, extremely bad.

(How do we know the pirate is gay if he’s just posing on a plate? Listen. Fully 100% to stereotype, but he is. He is gay. There’s an energy. That pirate is a flaming homosexual. That pirate has sex with men and does it frequently. That pirate is fucking gay, all right, he just is.)

Anyway. The point is that this is an extremely cheap and ugly plate with a poorly-executed painting of pirate on it who is like a nine on the Kinsey scale.

My grandmother and her sister fought a blood feud over this plate for their entire lives. It would be on the wall in my grandma’s house, and then her sister would visit, and then it would be gone. She’d visit her sister and the plate would be on the wall and her sister would pretend it had always been there. She would steal it back, hang it up, and, when her sister visited, pretend it had always been there. This continued for DECADES.

When the sister died, the Gay Pirate Plate lived triumphantly in my grandmother’s house. And then my grandmother died. And my aunt, who had lived with her and been her carer throughout her life, rightfully inherited their house.

We visit my aunt after the funeral and stay with her for a week or two.

Me, my sister, and our dad. Her brother.

The three of us look at each other. We don’t say anything. We studiously avoid making eye contact with the Gay Pirate Plate mounted proud and ugly on the wall. We notice one another studiously avoiding looking at it. We notice one another noticing. We say nothing. We come to a silent consensus. We pack up to leave. We get in the van. Our aunt comes out to say goodbye. I loudly announce I need to use the restroom before we leave. She obviously stays outside to continue talking to my dad.

I take down the Gay Pirate Plate, stuff it under my oversized sweatshirt, go outside, and get in the van. She happily waves goodbye as we drive off.

Two days later my dad gets a phone call that opens with hysterical laughter and “You FUCKING ASSHOLE did you seriously STEAL THE PLATE--”

Anyway. The gay pirate plate lives in my dad’s house currently.

But he’s trying to get me and my sister out to visit him. And plate mounts are cheap.

#gay pirate plate #GOD i wish I had a picture #y'all are not prepared for the gay pirate plate #anyway we don't think my dad should have to miss out on our hijinks #we think he would much prefer to be alive to witness the nonsense #than for us to morbidly wait until he dies to begin the third generation of Gay Pirate Plate

[khickuwa]

Starlight. Who do you see? Who do you smile for?

I hope it's me.

#art #artist #fanart #illustration #illust #digital art #sketch #comic #alien stage round 6 #alien stage ivan #alien stage till #alien stage #i wonder if this is ooc.... #i can't believe ya'll are here to witness a new chika phase #ivantill

[marisatomay]

there should be an oscar category called “movie my dad completed without falling asleep on the couch” and it’s more prestigious and contentious than best picture

#he would protest if he saw this and say he was ‘resting his eyes’ but i digress #here are the movies my dad watched for the first time this year and didn’t fall alseep: #top gun: maverick sunset boulevard there will be blood witness for the prosecution glass onion edge of tomorrow #i suspect avatar will be on the list but we’re not seeing that until the 18th #we watch a lot of movies so the sample size can be considered significant #but at the end of the day dads just really love top gun and tom cruise idk what to tell you

[starsandwriting]

OHHH SOFT STATIC AND WHIRRING OF RUNNING TAPE HOW I MISSED YOU

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #magp 10 #ACTUALLY STARTED PUNCHING THE WALL #im so glad i listen to tmagp im the balcony with the curtains drawn #at least my roommates dont witness how unhinged i get #the people down on the road however #myar #my entire inner monologue as soon as i heard that click was #TAPE RECORDER TAPE RECORDER TAPE RECORDER TAPE RECORDER

[here-there-everyfuckenwhere]

Cillian Murphy talking about Oppenheimer: yeah it’s a good movie :)

Ryan Gosling talking about Barbie: After working on this movie for so long I can only perceive the world in shades of pink… when I look at my reflection in the mirror, Ken is waving back at me…. he has Ken-sumed me, mind, body and soul….

#ray rants and junk #barbie (2023) #I love this for him btw #Ryan Gosling as Ken might be one of the most intense forms of method acting I have ever witnessed #barbie #Ryan gosling #barbenheimer #Oppenheimer

[tatertotcosmonaut]

Tumblr:

#one piece #monkey d luffy #idk why there’s a Luffy tab but hooray I guess lol #everyone should witness him

[chubs-deuce]

Alastor may dislike new age tech but that doesn't mean he doesn't have his sources lol

#hazbin hotel #alastor #velvette #hazbin hotel velvette #hazbin hotel alastor #digital fanart #digital art #fanart #art #my art #I just like the idea of Velvette keeping him in the loop with online drama and new age lingo #you can hardly manipulate people effectively if you can't fucking understand half of their slang after all #Velvette likes that he can keep up with her wit and is just as much of a judgy gossip as she is - Alastor finds her brash attitude amusing #he also has sources she doesn't so it's always nice to exchange information every once in a while over some tea/coffee #plus it's funny to hang out with your roommie's main source of hateboners bc he's actually pretty chill