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kaleidoscope77 · 3 years

Text

Amazing (NaLu One-shot)

Summary: Natsu and Lucy's monthly routine is interrupted by a seemingly harmless question.

Rated: T

Words: 1998

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"Lucy?" Natsu scanned the room for his blonde teammate, a little hint of worry on his face.

Mira had told him about how she came into the guildhall incredibly grumpy that morning, and she's been cooped up in her apartment for the rest of the day.

The girls advised him to give her space for a bit, and while Happy decided to heed their warnings and lay low, Natsu knew good and well what was going on.

"I'm in the kitchen!" The sound of Lucy's voice was enough to prove that his suspicions were correct, she sounded so out of it right now.

Natsu poked his head into the kitchen, and gave a sad smile at the sight of Lucy hunched over on the counter. "You okay?"

"Do I look okay?" Lucy grumbled, "Where have you been?"

"We just got back from a job yesterday," Natsu rolled his eyes, "I was sleepin'."

"...Well, I need you. Now."

"Hm… It's early."

"I know it's early. Just be glad it's not while we were on the job. Now c'mon," Lucy held her arms up, Natsu quickly getting the hint and scooping her up to carry her.

"Bed or couch?"

"Bed, please."

Just as she requested, Natsu brought her to the comfort of her bed and gave her a moment to get situated amongst the pillows before he joined her in laying down.

The two wrestled with the comforter for a bit before ultimately deciding to go without it, and as patience began to run thin, Lucy pulled Natsu closer by his scarf, bringing his body flush against hers.

"You know what to do," She mumbled, earning a quiet growl in response.

"Yeah, I know," Natsu didn't like being rushed, but he knew she had good reason to be impatient. He wrapped his arms around her abdomen and warmed up his hands, Lucy immediately sighing in pure bliss from the feeling.

"Ah, yes…" She snuggled back into him, leaving no space between their bodies, "I've been waiting… all day for this."

Natsu frowned, had he known she was in pain, he would've came over sooner. "Sorry."

"Don't be. Like you said, it came early this month. Hit me like a ton of bricks, though."

"Then you should get something to warm your belly up when I'm not around…"

"I actually do have a heating pad," Lucy turned around to face him, making sure his hands didn't lose their place over the source of her pain, "But your hands are so much better."

Natsu couldn't deny that he really liked hearing her prefer his magic over something else, but a part of him still felt bad. He didn't mind doing this every month, it was the only time Lucy allowed him to not only be in her bed, but to also be this close to her while doing so.

It's nice to feel like she depends on him, and to be able to do something for her that no one else can. And their alone time during these days are always nice, sometimes she'll fall asleep in his arms, and other times they'll pass the time by just talking about any and everything.

But, he still hated that she had to be in pain for them to get this… close.

"Thanks for always doing this for me, Natsu," Lucy smiled. He couldn't help but smile back at her.

"'S not like I got something better to do."

"Mhm," She wrapped her arms around his middle, now each of them holding the other tightly, "You're the best. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Me too."

"Really?"

"Yeah…"

"Aw, that's sweet," Lucy laid her head against Natsu's chest, closed her eyes and took in the peaceful moment. It was amazing to think about how she'd been in so much agony this morning, only for him to show up and relieve so much of the pain in seconds. She considers herself quite fortunate to be close with a fire mage like this. "...Do you think you could do this for me forever?"

"Of course," Natsu couldn't see how that could even be a question. He'll always be here for her when she needs him.

"You sure? Forever is a long time…"

"Yeah, it's not like it's hard to lay here with my hand on your stomach."

Lucy let out a quiet giggle, "That's not just it, though. Like, would you do it even in the distant future? When we're older?"

"...I don't see why not."

"Okay, and even when we go off and get married?"

"Uh, obviously… C'mon, I thought you were smarter than this, Luce."

"What? Don't start with that," She rolled her eyes, "Do you actually think our future spouses would be okay with us cuddling once month?"

Natsu stared at her, and when she didn't get a response, Lucy pulled away from his embrace to look into his eyes. He seemed genuinely confused, like there was something he was silently trying to wrap his head around.

"...Lucy."

"Yeah? You're thinking pretty hard there-"

"Why wouldn't it be okay for us to cuddle once a month?"

"Oh, c'mon. You know why," Lucy's face began to flush. It was obvious that these moments were pretty intimate, she'd only been ignoring it because her cramps are too ruthless for her to be worrying about that sort of thing.

But for him to be so confused, it was like he hadn't even noticed how close they are, and how close they've been since he started being her personal heating pad not too long after they met. Lucy assumed being able to lay with him like this was great progress in the direction she wished to go with him, but perhaps it's not reciprocated.

"Actually, nevermind. Just forget I asked-"

"Wait, I don't get why you think I'll stop doing this for you when we're married…"

"When we're-" Lucy shook her head, choosing to ignore his choice of words and the way they sounded, "Look, my future husband may not like you in my bed, holding me like this."

"...Yes I would, though? And you just asked me to do this for you forever, why would that change when you're my wife?"

It took a full minute for Lucy to process what he just said, and then another minute for her to replay it over and over in her head to make sure he really just said that.

Her face was bright red, burning nearly as hot as his hands on her stomach. "N-Natsu…" She willed herself not to stutter, but it was impossible with the way he looked at her.

"Yeah?"

"I didn't mean we'd be married to each other..!"

"What? Why?" Natsu's face broke out into a pout, and it was just the cutest thing.

Now, Lucy's heart felt like it'd just explode. "Oh my gosh! You seriously- I- I don't even-" She was at a lost, she'd been harboring these feelings for so long, just for him to blatantly admit something like that. "You… you'd wanna marry me?"

"Uh, duh?" This whole conversation had Natsu so confused, "We're basically already married anyway."

"W-what!? No we are not..!"

"We're not..?"

"No!"

"Oh…" Now the sadness on his face doubled, causing Lucy's heart to get tight.

"But…" She took in a deep breath. If he could say it so casually, she need to be upfront with him too, "I mean… I'm not opposed to being l-like… that with you…"

"Oh, so you're cool with it?"

"...Yeah, I'm c-cool with it."

"Cool. Now let's get married so you won't have to ask stupid questions like that!"

"Huh!?" Lucy squeaked when he began to sit up, stopping him before he could start carrying her, "Wait, lay back down!"

"Oh, right," He almost forgot about her current predicament, laying right back down and warming up his hands to offer her comfort. "We'll do it once you're done."

"Oh my gosh…" Lucy still wasn't convinced that this was real life right now, and that he was actually serious about this, "...We can't just go off and get married, Natsu."

"Huh? Says who?" Now he seemed to assume there was something coming in between them, the angry look on his face nearly making Lucy laugh.

"We aren't even dating yet…"

"...So?"

"So, we can't just get married when you haven't even… asked me on a date yet…" Lucy played with the loose ends of her hair, now refusing to look him in his eyes. It was easier to say these things knowing that he wants something like this, but it's still incredibly embarrassing.

"Oh."

"Y-yeah…"

The room fell back into silence, and Lucy let out an awkward cough when she realized he wasn't going to say anything more on the subject. "Uh, Natsu?"

"Hm?"

"...We can't get married before we start dating…"

"Yeah, I heard ya."

"...So, ask me on a date, silly!"

"Oh," Natsu had just assumed that was a rejection, he didn't know he could just ask like that, "Okay, uh, wanna go on a date?"

"I do!" As Lucy engulfed him in a big hug, Natsu's own heart began to flutter. She could be pretty confusing at times, but he was glad to have her right here.

"We can get married now, right?"

"Ugh," Lucy tightened the hug so she could hide her flushed face, "I don't know if you're doing this on purpose…"

He wasn't, but if it got her to react like this, he'd be sure to keep it up. "You're so weird."

"Me? You literally just assumed we'd get married! Imagine if I didn't feel the same…"

Natsu growled, he did not like imagining that. Besides, it was pretty obvious to him at this point, it's not like Lucy just let's anyone cuddle with her.

"And to answer your question- we can't get married now, that commitment takes time to think about."

"Eh? But I've had plenty of time…"

"...You've been thinking about it for that long?" Lucy's eyes sparkled, but she quickly brought herself back to reality, "I mean, no. That's something we'd need to discuss together in due time."

Still, Natsu couldn't understand why she'd want to wait so long, but if all she wants is time, he was willing to be patient. "Alright."

"Mhm. Leave it to you to wanna get married before we've even…"

"Hm? 'Before we've even' what?"

"...N-no, nevermind."

"C'mon, Lucy, I wanna know what else I gotta do."

"We, uh, we haven't had our first kiss…"

At the same time, they leaned back to gouge the other's expression, their eyes darting to each other's lips.

Lucy stifled an awkward laugh as she saw the look on Natsu's face, "Oh my gosh, are you blushing?"

He huffed, she was acting like her face isn't bright red right now. Before Lucy could convince herself that she shouldn't have said that, Natsu cupped her cheek and inched closer, her face heating up with each second.

Lucy knew he'd go for it as soon as she said that, and she fought the urge to cowar away when his lips came down to meet hers.

The kiss was quick and clumsy, but it had Natsu grinning against her lips and puffing out his chest in pride.

Lucy let herself giggle once they separated, she was overcome with giddiness and excitement. In her head, things would've been more romantic than an awkward confession in her bed while she's battling period cramps, but that doesn't matter right now.

"Can we kiss again?" Natsu mumbled, already leaning towards her lips.

Lucy answered by closing in the space between them, crashing her lips onto his and deepening the kiss.

Her hands ran along his body, feeling him up and down and enjoying every second before they had to separate for air.

"...Amazing," Lucy mumbled, though it wasn't like she had anything to base the kiss on.

Natsu was in the same boat, and he was actually more concerned about kissing her some more. "Yeah… Amazing."

#ft nalu #fairy tail #lucy heartifilla #nalu #nalu fairytail #natsu dragneel #nalu fluff #fanfic #oneshot #nalu fanfic #natsu x lucy

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starshipsofstarlord · 3 years

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I Miss Him

Pairings | Liam Dunbar x reader. Past Brett Talbot x reader.

Summary | previously, you had dated Brett, a while before you and Liam began to kick it together. But now he’s dead, and you can’t help but mourn for your ex boyfriend, he was not only that to you, but also a good friend.

Warnings | mentions of death, mourning, loss, angst

Requested ✖️

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

The hunters were out of control, acting out of fear, taking innocent lives, all because they thought that it would ensure their safety. To their mortal dismay however, they did not acknowledge that there was something more intricate at play, twisting their wills, and bending them to its deadly whim.

But they didn’t know the first thing about supernatural species, in fact, you were a lot like them. You loved, and endured loss, the pain of such a thievery almost breaking your heart.

Liam felt guilty, from where he sat in class, watching you. He could sense you wanted to rip Gabe’s throat out for his loyalty to Monroe. He too had that desire, but upon Scott’s orders, and against his impulsive wishes, he remained silent, and tried to blend in.

But he was well aware, since that night, all eyes were on him, piercing him with their scared and revolted judgement. They had seen a truth that they had not been prepared for, and the idea of creatures that stalked and preyed under the moonlight, walking around in human skin, terrified all of them.

It was her fault that Lorrie and Brett were killed, she was going to pay. Your claws gouged the underneath of your desk, lightly picking away the wood with ease.

To say you were infuriated was understatement. Every possible emotion burdened you, and it made you feel utterly heart broke. Brett Talbot had been your first love, and whilst the two of you had eventually broken up, things ended pm good terms.

The image of his body, covered by Lori’s surrendered one haunted you. If you hadn’t tried to keep up with the chase, and not ended the new hunters, you’d mistake yourself for suffering from symptoms to poisoning too.

“He’s a monster.” The words met your ears, and that voice belonged to the murderer that you knew to be Gabe. “Dunbar is going to be next, we just need to expose him first.”

Your eyes rapidly fluttered around the room, inspecting every corner with your hyperactive sight. Liam was their new target, and it brought a burning wrench within your gut, one of which you tried to control.

For now, it was all talk. But that said, the humans would eventually take action to strike, and you’d be damned if you lost another loved one; especially Liam.

The lacrosse players exited the coach, carrying their tactical bags, as you absentmindedly trailed behind them, smiling up at Brett as he stood tall among the herd. Breathing in the fresh air, you reeled your mind blank for a moment, until you heard disruptive chatter, that sounded like it was going south.

Once you returned to your conscious senses, you saw your boyfriend talking down to a shorter boy, who wore an unimpressed expression. It was Liam Dunbar, the by that had moved to this school after his anger problems had gotten out of hand - literally.

Holding your head high, you walked over to the small group of players that had gathered,and were demeaning the blonde. Calling out Brett’s name he slowly turned towards you, his brow firmly raised. He hardly moved your intent for interrupting his latent and distressed discussion, and so you grabbed his elbow, pulling him away.

Before walking away with your long legged partner, you sent Liam a calm smile, only to end up dragging the werewolf towards the back of the bus, leaving Liam’s new friends in a state of relief. A cocky smile forged onto his face, as he trapped you against the weight carrying vehicle, leaning down so that his tender and luscious lips were fanning air upon your own.

“Did someone get all hot and bothered seeing me put Dunbar in his place?” He snickered, and whilst you usually adored his humour, now was not the time nor place for it predominant presence. At his usual self and words, you contained an infatuated grin, up keeping your stern expression towards him.

“You are here to play lacrosse, not tick off Liam.” You reminded him, swatting his face away as he tried to apologetically peck you. “No Brett, you can sense it too. The change practically reeks off him,he’s one of us.”

“It’s all fun and games.” He tried to reason, but you weren’t having it. And so you crossed your arms over the other upon your chest, harmlessly glaring up at him.

“When you’re n that position, it isn’t. It’s something you need experienced, you were born a wolf, a lot of us weren’t. And let me tell you, when the first first begins to make you into something else, it didn’t easy. So cut Liam some slack, would you? For me?”

A light scoff exited Brett’s mouth, but eventually, with the aid of your prone flowering, he gave in, tipping his head back, and groaning. “You bring out the best in me, and as much as i love t, at times it can be a pain in the ass.”

“Well,” you began, warmly squinting your eyes at the boy. “I’m your pain in the ass. And I’d say you have quite a nice ass.” You smirked.

“You always know what to say to pull me back.” He moved closer and this time you allowed him to close the space between you. In fact, you relished in it, falling deeper for the Devenford Prep student, with every word that the pair of you exchanged.

A deep breath caused you to falter your staring into nothingness. As you looked to the side, you noticed Liam knelt beside you, clasping your face. And that was when you realised that class must have been over, for the room was entirely empty.

“Hey, you good gorgeous?” Liam asked, cradling your jaw as though it would break under your touch. He was admittedly worried, you didn’t have the best record for controlling the inner animal. During class,he thought he may have needed to stop you from killing Gabe.

To everyone’s luck, that wasn’t necessary, and everyone was still alive... or, at least, almost everyone was. It would merely be a matter of time until Gerard got the war that he wanted, it clearly had already began.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You mumbled, feeling comfort in the warmth of his hand. It was one of the few things that could bring you any kind of calm and steadiness in these dire times.

“How’d you stop yourself?” He also had troubles with control, the conflict of his inner nature and his inwards anger had never been friends. Slowly, you licked your lips, as you scrambled for the answer, unaware that it had been right in front of you all this time.

“Brett, he’s- or at least, the memory of him - is my anchor.” You tried to explain, a furrow on your face as the mere mention of the boy, and the thought of him alongside his dear sister set you into ample mourning. Instead of saying anything more, Liam pulled your head down to curl against his shoulder, him sharing your pan and loss.

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kitsutaes · 4 years

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pluto protector

pairing: taehyung x reader

genre: fluff, coming of age-ish, bffs2lovers!, astrophysicist!reader, & artist!taehyung

word count: 2.6k

rating: pg-13 i guess

warnings: none

a/n: this is inspired by rex orange county’s song pluto projector, a song i love so so much. also this fic is split up into small parts & it focuses more on tae’s and reader’s small but important moments together !! i hope you like it even though it isn’t too heavily edited. p.s. thank you teresa / @sketchguk for looking this over !! you da best !!

summary: you and taehyung have been in the same galaxy, orbiting one another for as long as you could remember. but as time passes, gravity pulls you in closer and closer, ready for the two of you to collide.

Kim Taehyung was your protector. Just at the age of nine, Kim Taehyung held your hand as the two of you ran around the playground, feet hitting the wood chips that spewed around. His disheveled chocolate brown hair bounced around as he ran, eyes bright as he turned around to look at you. He had a goofy smile plastered on his face, exuberant as any nine year old at the park with his best friend should be.

“___! Let’s go on the swirly slide!” Taehyung yells, pointing at the bright red slide ahead. The playground near your neighborhood was huge since it was already part of an already massive park. While the park had its own variety of plants and wildlife, the playground consisted of slides, swings, monkey bars, and corkscrew climbers that allowed you to climb up and slide down like you were going down a fireman’s pole; only round and round instead of sliding straight down.

“Okay, but only if we go on the monkey bars next Tae!” You respond, swinging your arm that held his hand. Your eyes matched his, bright and bubbly. Taehyung nodded as the two of you climbed the blue steps that led to the big red swirly slide.

“You first or me?” Taehyung asks, letting go of you hand to grasp the yellow metal bars on the sides of the red slide. You roll your eyes, seeing his mischievous grin, basically telling you he was he was ready to go first.

“You.”

Sticking out your tongue at him, Taehyung takes off, gravity pulling him down until his sneakers hit the ground. He turns around, motioning for you to slide down.

“C’mon ___!” Taehyung calls from below. His arms are crossed as he waits for you to come down. You nod, your own hands gripping the metal bars Taehyung previously held onto as you’re seated on the bright red plastic. Letting go, you slide down, feeling parts of your hair stick up to the underside of the slide.

Taehyung’s eyes widen as he knows what’s coming next. You’re up and off of the slide, ready to chase him and zap him with your finger charged with static.

“___! Come and get me!” Taehyung giggles running off to the opposite side of the playground to avoid getting shocked. You’re right behind him, but you trip on your own foot, falling onto the wood chips.

Instead of a smile, you’ve got a pout on your face. Eyes turning red, brimming with tears, ready to cry. Taehyung’s looking back at you with a worried expression, heels turning around as he’s running back towards you.

“Tae!” You cry as his arms are helping you up, feet standing upright once again. His hands are gripping onto yours, leading you back to where your parents were.

“It’s okay ___, I’ve got you.”

At the age of twelve, Kim Taehyung was still your protector. Although you ended up with different teachers and classes, the two of you didn’t drift apart like most friends did as they entered middle school. Most kids ended up finding new friends, groups, cliques–forgetting and leaving the friendships they made when they were just a few years younger. But, you and Taehyung weren’t like most kids. The two of you stayed together in gravity’s grasp, never leaving the solar system you shared.

Just like always, after school, Taehyung came over to do homework with you since you shared the same subjects. His green backpack would be plopped onto your carpeted floor right beside yours, colored pencils and papers almost spilling out of them.

“You had to read The Monkey’s Paw too?” You ask turning around in your seat, nose scrunching at the thought of the story Mrs. Tang read to your class today that gave you the chills. It was a story written by W.W. Jacobs that just had to be a part of your English class’s “Poetry and Short Stories” unit and you couldn’t wait for it to be over.

Taehyung was seated on your bed while you were seated at your desk. Taehyung looks up from his math homework, nodding at you.

“Yeah, I kinda liked it.” He says, giving you a small shrug as you shudder.

“It was creepy!”

Taehyung laughs at your expression, your face showing that you were totally repulsed that he slightly enjoyed the supernatural short story that was required to be read in every 7th grade class.

“Just a little bit,” he responds as he looks down at his homework, “I bet you’re enjoying science right now though.”

Taehyung was 100% correct, you were loving science this week. This week’s unit was about space and that was something you held close to your heart. There was just something about the universe, galaxies, protostars, and planets that intrigued you to no limit. You wanted to be like Neil deGrasse Tyson and Carl Sagan, exploring the vast universe full of the unknown. Just last year it was announced that Pluto would no longer be considered a planet and just that, broke your heart to pieces; Taehyung was there to witness it. Your love for the little planet was undying, feeling as if it deserved much more appreciation just like Neptune and Jupiter. In your eyes, Pluto was something special.

“Yes, oh my gosh! We get to make a presentation of a planet of our choice, and I’m still picking Pluto. I don’t care what Mr. Peterson says.” You scoff, a determined look gracing your face as you turn back around in your seat.

In that very moment, in Taehyung’s eyes, you were something special.

Graduation had finally fallen upon you. After days of graduation practice, you were finally here; sitting in the risers, that was placed on the fifty-yard line of the football field, clothed in your graduation gown that possessed one of your school’s colors. The night had overtaken the sunny skies, leaving you and your fellow classmates and friends underneath the shining stars as well as the bright stadium lights your school used for all sorts of events.

Your parents were in the stands, most likely with Taehyung’s family, along with other parents and family members of graduating high school seniors with their phones and cameras taking pictures to capture this once in a lifetime moment.

You didn’t graduate a valedictorian or salutatorian, but at least you made it until the end. It may pain some to hear it but grades aren’t everything. Despite getting kids into higher level colleges, grades don’t and can’t define a person, you learned that the hard way. High school’s about learning about yourself and the people you surround yourself with. Are they real friends? Do they talk about you behind your back? To you, it’s about exploration, finding the people who fit you well and help you shine brighter like the stars, and hopefully avoiding space debris that just get in the way.

Taehyung’s seated a few rows above you with only a few people separating the two of you, meaning you’re still able to make faces at each other, winking and scrunching your noses while the ceremony proceeds.

He looks great, handsome even. Dark locks trimmed just for this special event, since his mom made him. His bright eyes are shining even brighter with the reflection of the stadium lights as you peer up to look at him.

Seeing him like this, you realize how grown up he looks. Despite only being eighteen, the Kim Taehyung sitting a few seats away from you definitely does not look like the Kim Taehyung you met in 3rd grade. That Taehyung you met years ago is still somewhat the same as the Taehyung now, but just older, more mature–not mature, but more. It makes you realize how time flies, because it literally just seemed like yesterday where Taehyung first moved in a couple houses down from yours. Your neighborhood was full of elderly people, so when you found out a kid your age had just moved into town, you were ecstatic. Ecstatic to the point where you bugged your mother to take you to meet your new neighbors.

You smile to yourself as you look away, eyes reaching the stars that you were always fond of.

This was a moment you hoped you would remember forever.

“I felt like gouging my eyes out.”

Taehyung’s eyes roll at your complaint. You just came out of your physics class with Mr. Garcia’s lecture picking at your brains during the entire hour and a half. You and Jungkook (the only person you knew in that class) walked out looking as if your souls had left your body; even though that was exactly what happened. The two of you part ways with a tired wave as he had another class to attend.

Taehyung had been waiting for you since his class finished a few minutes before yours. He was nose deep into a book when you find him sitting on a bench just outside your building. His bright blue hair made him easy to spot anywhere. He made you dye his hair before the semester started, insisting on trying a brand new look.

Before the two of you graduated high school, you’d done college applications. You’d gotten into one of your dream colleges, opening the acceptance letter in front of Taehyung and your parents. Taehyung on the other hand, didn’t tell you what college he got into until after the graduation ceremony. It led to you punching his arm while exuding tears of happiness. Now, at the age of 21, you’re spending your time attending classes, studying for exams, while downing cups of coffee during breaks with your best friend.

“Seriously ___, your fault for wanting to be an astrophysics major.” Taehyung scoffs, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as the two of you head off to one of the coffee shops you and Taehyung frequent the most. Fortunately it was close, just a couple blocks away.

Smacking his arm away, you frown. “You say that every single time.”

“I’m just stating facts.” Taehyung shrugs, wrapping an arm around you again, and this time you don’t fight it.

Your own arm wraps around his waist, gripping onto a part of his coat. Taehyung, even though you didn’t want to admit it to anyone else but yourself, made you feel safe. Whenever he’d scoop you up into his arms for a hug, or just had his arm around you as you two walked down the street, it made you feel loved. Knowing that someone cares in this world full of fortunate and unfortunate events, is one of the greatest feelings in this world.

“I wish I was still in astrology 101 or 102, learning about the stars, black holes, and the Milky Way,” You say, grinning cheekily at the man beside you. “—not the chocolate.”

“I literally wasn’t even going to say that.”

“Liar.” You snort, nudging his side with your elbow. The two of you have reached your destination, ready for caffeine that you’re desperate for. Taehyung’s arm has left your shoulder, a certain warmth departing with him, as he opens the door for you like the gentleman he’s always been.

“What do you want?” He asks as you both reach the cashier and glass display case showing an ever so wonderful variety of pastries to eat with an already amazing cup of coffee.

Peering through the glass you see some newly added goods, alongside the usual but you already have your order in mind.

“I’ll have a macchiato and some madeleines please,” You say to the woman manning the cashier with a soft smile, while taking out your wallet from the small pocket of your backpack. Taehyung’s hand stops you, handing his own credit card to the lady who grins cheekily at the two of you. She was around maybe thirty years old.

“Tae—”

“And I’ll have a hot chocolate please.” Taehyung’s lips are pursed, nodding his head as she repeats your order.

“You guys are a really cute couple by the way,” She smiles, handing Taehyung back his card along with the receipt while you’re left standing there staring at him with wide eyes as he thanks her for the compliment.

At the age of 24, you’d think you would have plenty of things figured out. You don’t.

But at this age, you’ve learned that things really aren’t constant in the world, and that everything’s prone to change. Although somehow, there’s one thing in your life that hasn’t really changed.

“Tae, where are we going?” You whine, head leaning on the car window. Taehyung had just picked you up from work, a long day of work, and all you wanted to do was go home.

You and Taehyung had been dating for awhile now, after he admitted his long time feelings for you when he took you to his studio and painted you your favorite planet in the Milky Way. His feelings for you were returned, having loved him ever since you were kids as well. Now, he spends most of his time at your apartment as if you two shared it; not like he didn’t do that before already.

“___, you’ve asked me that 5 times already and I told you that it’s a secret.” He says, turning his head towards you for a moment before looking back on the road. You don’t see it, but he’s sporting a small smile on his face. Taehyung’s been waiting to show you this secret of his for quite some time.

Your head isn’t leaning on the window anymore as you recognize where you’re headed to. “Wait, we’re going to your studio?” The road to Taehyung’s art studio is one that isn’t too familiar but isn’t unknown as well.

After a few more minutes of driving and parallel parking (which actually doesn’t take Taehyung long to do it) you’re already standing in his studio, gazing at his works of art.

“Tae, these are incredible.”

While you’re gaping at his paintings, Taehyung’s laughing at your reaction to his creations. This is the first time in a long time you’ve visited his studio, and the first time in a long time that he’s shared his pieces with you. While you’re studying about outer space and the secrets of the universe, Taehyung’s in his studio painting his heart out whenever he wasn’t busy.

Whenever he was in the mood to paint, he’d enter this zone, totally blocking out anything and everything, letting his passion for the arts take over. Sometimes when he’d pick you up to have a cup of coffee or when he’d come over to have dinner at your apartment, he’d have paint marks all over his hands and occasionally his face.

Like you with your science idols, Taehyung admired plenty of incredible artists who worked with various mediums like, Claude Monet, Keith Haring, and especially Vincent Van Gogh. Taehyung had this affinity for Van Gogh’s artworks that even he couldn’t fully explain why he loved them so much.

“Wait until you see this,” Taehyung says, reaching towards one of the canvases he had stacked and leaning on the side of his wall.

You’re so immersed into some of his other paintings you don’t realize he’s right beside you, ready to reveal one of his latest pieces. Taehyung loved to experiment with different mediums, always trying to find his niche. You noticed even though he painted a variety of things, he loved to paint scenery. You could feel yourself getting absorbed into his creations full of lush greens and calming sunsets, fluffy clouds, and sometimes quite the opposite.

“___,” Taehyung nudges you, poking your cheek to get your attention and it definitely works. You’re turning your head, eyes catching a painting of Pluto that looks exactly like the real deal, as if you’re seeing the planet with your own eyes.

“I love you ___. As much as you love this little planet and as many light years it would take to reach other universes out there.”

#bangtanhq #bangtanscenery #thekimlinenet #vantaenet #btsbookclub #btswriterscollective #kim taehyung #taehyung x reader #kim taehyung x reader #taehyung fluff #bts fluff #bts fic #bts scenarios #bts

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irwingiggling · 4 years

Text

westbrook | pt. 7

gang!ashton; gang!5sos

[pt. 1] [pt. 2] [pt. 3] [pt. 4] [pt. 5] [pt. 6]

[Image credit: @not-grey-enough]

A/N: Heyy guys so I’m back. My last year of university was so crazy and stressful until suddenly it wasn’t because all my classes were moved online and a bunch of assignments/finals became optional or cancelled completely. Just found out today my graduation is officially cancelled. It feels like there was so much build up and anticipation for the final year but now it’s become literally the most anticlimactic experience of my life lmao.. Anyways, now I’m at home, with a bunch of free time on my hands, which means I can continue this story! I hope you guys enjoy, and please feel free to leave me any comments or if you literally wanna talk about anything, just send me a message! :)

Summary: In which Ashton is one of the leaders of the Westbrook Dragons, a gang who often feuds with the Vipers for control of the streets. After hearing of her estranged father’s death, Marina comes to Westbrook to fix up his house and sell it. Coming from a privileged neighborhood, the last thing Marina expects is to move in next door to a gang’s hideout.

Word Count: 2,400+

Rating: PG-13

Marina locked the front door of the house behind her and made her way down the steps towards Ashton, who was leaning against the front of an old red chevy truck.

After the whole break-in fiasco, they had taken a couple weeks to heal both mentally and physically. The boys had helped Marina repaint the exterior of the house, which had been graffitied pretty badly by Parson's goon before he broke in that night. She felt closer to the whole gang, not just Ashton. Now the house was finished again - for good this time - and Marina and Ashton had re-listed the house with another realtor - one without any gang associations.

Ashton spent most nights at the house since he'd essentially moved in after the break-in, but sometimes business would cause him to stay back at his apartment, where he'd work late into the night, and Marina wouldn’t see him until the next day. It was on one of those days that Ashton had called Marina and asked her out on a date, after he was done with work. They'd been boyfriend and girlfriend for a while now, but while they spent a fair bit of time together, they didn't get the chance to go on actual dates very often.

"Wow, I didn't know you owned anything other than a motorcycle," Marina observed dryly, eyebrows raising as she walked up to Ashton.

Ashton laughed, patting the hood. "Nah, I work on this one in my spare time. She gives me trouble sometimes, but we work through it."

Marina chuckled at his response as she walked over to the passenger door. She was about to grab the handle but Ashton beat her to it, opening the door and gesturing for her to step inside with a little bow.

"Why thank you, sir," she replied, teasingly blowing him a kiss.

As she settled into the passenger seat, her gaze floated over the interior. Sure, the leather was cracked and the wooden dashboard had a variety of chips and gouges, but it had character. Marina found herself appreciating it, a lot more now than if she had seen it a couple months ago.

Ashton noticed her watchful eye, and quickly spoke up. "I know it's not your Range Rover, but-

"It's perfect," she smiled, leaning forwards to run her fingers over the dashboard.

He gave her a small nod and smiled, turning the keys and causing the engine to roar to life.

She looked over at the door, thinking that the air running through her hair would be perfect right about now, but instead she stared perplexedly at the wood panelling. Absent were the normal switches for the windows.

"It's this one," Ashton said, reaching across her lap to touch the spinning handle. In this close proximity, she noticed that his usual smell of leather and cigarettes had gained a new underlying hint of sandalwood and another undeterminable scent. The fact that he'd put on a little bit of cologne for their date made the outer corners of her lips tweak up into a smile.

"What?" Ashton asked, once he'd resumed his normal position, watching her out of the corner of his eye.

"Nothing," she smiled, shaking her head. "I just think you're adorable."

He giggled - full-out giggled - and readjusted his grip on the steering wheel. "Now that's not something I get often."

They both laughed, and then sat in comfortable silence for a little while.

"Can I turn on the music?" Marina asked, as they turned down a quiet country road.

"Sure. But I have to warn you, the radio only picks up one station and it's all country, all the time."

Marina laughed and turned the volume dial up. The sound of a twangy guitar and southern accent immediately filled the cabin. She looked over to Ashton again and smiled, putting her arm out the window and moving it along to the beat, wind whipping through her fingertips.

---

They drove until Marina had no idea where they were. Eventually Ashton pulled off the gravel road, the truck chugging along merrily until he cut the engine and it sputtered to a stop in a field of tall grass. Marina looked around at the tall stalks growing wild, swinging freely in the wind. They had to be the only ones around for miles.

"Ashton where are we?" she asked in slight confusion. He hadn't told her what the plan was for their date, but she assumed it would be at a restaurant in town somewhere.

"Our date," he replied with a smile, pocketing the keys and jumping out of the truck.

Marina chuckled lightly, and opened the door, stepping out of the passenger side. She followed Ashton to the back of the truck, and watched as he pulled the tailgate down to reveal an array of blankets and pillows, with a picnic basket in the middle.

"Voila," he gestured to the setup, leaning casually against the side of the truck.

Marina couldn't help the smile on her face. "Aww this is cute," she cooed, "You've really outdone yourself, Ash."

He looked over at her and smiled, taking her hand to help her up into the back of the truck.

"It's beautiful out here," Marina said as she looked around. The sun was just beginning to set, casting a faint orangey-purple hue over everything it touched.

"I know right. I come here to think sometimes, and I think it's so peaceful. I wanted to show it to you."

"Well thank you for sharing it, I really appreciate it."

"I know there's some stuff you don't know about me yet, I know I can be guarded, but I want you to know that I'm really trying to let you in."

The conversation flowed easily between the two of them, even the pauses were comfortable. After one particularly longer silence, Ashton spoke up in a slightly different tone.

"Sometimes I can't.... sleep," he confessed quietly, staring off into the distance, eyes closing slightly in reflex as the setting sun poured out towards them.

Marina looked up at him, raising her head off his chest. "Why not?" she asked gently, lacing their fingers together.

He leaned down to rest his cheek on the top of her head, and was silent for a little while. She rubbed gentle circles into the scarred skin on the palm of his hand.

"I've just been thinking a lot… especially recently."

"What about?" she asked.

He let out a small sigh, a puff of air that reverberated off her ear.

"You don't have to tell me, if you don't want."

His other arm snaked around from its casual position resting against the side of the truck, to pull her closer to him. He was silent for a little while longer. "About you," he said softly. "About… us." She was still, kept silent, waiting to see if he would elaborate. She could hear the smile in his voice but it was tinged with something else.

She felt him shake his head. "I'm not a good person, Mar."

"Yes, you-"

"I sell people coke. I get people addicted to it and ruin their lives. I'm like, shittiest person of the year. I profit off other people's misery, just to give them an escape from reality for a couple hours - do you know how much that eats me up inside all the time? But this is the only thing I have, the only thing I'm any good at. And I can't just stop, the boys rely on me running all of this. What would they do? They need the money for their families just like I need it for mine. And the thought that…" he trailed off, looking away into the fields.

After a few moments of silence, he spoke up again. "It's different now. I always knew I'd be able to take care of myself, but I forgot about the fact that maybe one day I'd want to share my life with someone else. Someone who deserved better. And now I'm thinking maybe I made the wrong choice, but at the same time I can't abandon the Dragons, they're my brothers."

"Have you talked to them about this?"

"No," he shook his head. "There's never really time, when we're all together. And I don't wanna… they look to me for advice, how can I just bail on them? And what would I even do?" he sighed. "This is all I know."

"You're good at a lot of things, Ash. You're an incredible businessman, and leader. That can transfer into a lot of different areas, if you ever need it to."

"You think?" he asked. She reach a hand up to brush softly against his cheek. She'd never seen this side of him, so vulnerable, almost insecure.

"Fuck, I'm sorry," he said after a moment, clearing his throat and shifting position, covering himself back up again.

"No, hey don't be sorry," she said, turning over to look him in the eyes, trying to convey the sincerity of her words. "It's important to talk about this kind of stuff. I really appreciate you opening up to me."

He gave her a soft smile and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm so glad I have you," he said, snuggling further against her.

"Me too," she whispered softly.

"I love you," she said, looking out into the field of glowing, golden grass. She looked up at him. He was watching her, blinking through weary, tear-filled eyes, a glimmer of hope shimmering beneath the surface.

"I love you too," he said softly, breathing deeply into her hair and closing his eyes. "So fucking much."

"And you're not a bad person, Ash. You're a good person who fell into bad circumstances. You have such a good heart, deep down in there," she said, poking his chest gently. "I know hiding it is the only way to survive in this town. But I've seen it, I know it exists."

---

Ashton slept over that night, and in the morning Marina awoke to the other side of the bed empty. Confused, she sat up, and saw a note on the bedside table.

I woke up early and you looked so adorable I didn't wanna wake you. I'm just next door with the guys, come over when you're awake :) - Ash

Marina looked out the window, watching the guys chatting away and working on their motorcycles in the driveway. She didn't want to be too quick to rush down there, they looked like they were having a great time just chatting, listening to some classic rock music, and tinkering away on their cars and motorcycles. Marina smiled. The Dragons truly were like a brotherhood. A couple minutes later, a black suv pulled up, parking across the driveway. Marina supposed someone was coming to pick up a delivery. The boys must have assumed that too, as the three of them continued on, with Calum putting down his wrench and casually making his way towards the vehicle. Suddenly, four people in police uniforms and bulletproof vests jumped out. Calum took a couple steps backwards, surprised. He yelled something to the guys, who immediately dropped what they're doing.

Marina couldn't hear exactly what was going on, but two of the officers advanced quickly down the driveway, the other two standing guard near the vehicle in case reinforcements were needed. Marina's heart thudded in her throat. What was going on?!

The police officer yelled something again, and Ashton moved to place both hands behind his head, demonstrating that he wasn't armed and wouldn't put up a fight. Marina saw the reflection of stainless steel from one of the officer's pockets and each of the two officers grabbed one of Ashton's hands, pulling them down behind his back and clamping the cuffs on.

Marina flew outside to the porch, hands grasping the newly stained wood banister, the same one that Ashton had placed his bouquet of flowers near what now felt like a lifetime ago. It took everything in her not to run down the stairs and demand to know what was going on, try to pull Ashton away from the officers, but she knew she couldn't. As far as everyone else in town knew, she had nothing to do with the Westbrook Dragons.

From her new vantage point she could see and hear the unfolding events even better. One voice stuck out on the driveway, the loud and booming one of the police officer who was leading Ashton away.

"Ashton Irwin, you are under arrest for assault causing bodily harm. You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to contact a lawyer. Anything you say may be used against you in the court of law."

No no no no. All that was running through Marina's mind in that moment was sheer panic and shock. She tried to call out to him but her voice got stuck in her throat and instead she made a funny, wheezing sound, as if she'd just been punched in the stomach.

One of the officers opened the door to the police car, and the other two led Ashton over. At this moment Ashton scanned his surroundings, turning back towards the house. His eyes locked with hers, dark with defeat but also an underlying defiance. He communicated wordlessly with her, trying to give her a reassuring look that everything would be alright. But he only had seconds before the officer pushed his head down into the car, and slammed the door shut. Then she could only see his silhouette and the black bars across the window. The remaining officers climbed into the suv, gravel crunching underneath the vehicle's tires as it left the driveway, turning onto the main road.

Marina waited until it was safe and the car was just a speck in the distance, then she ran down the stairs to the three boys remaining in the driveway, her rapid footfalls quickly closing the space between them.

"Is he gonna be ok? What's going on?" she asked, tears already streaming down her face.

Both Luke and Michael put their arms around her instantly. She buried her face in the sleeve of Luke's leather jacket.

"Looks like Parsons snitched," Calum said, crossing his arms, face stony.

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aliceslantern · 4 years

Text

Retribution, a Kingdom Hearts fanfic, chapter 2

Newly a person again, Ienzo is weighed down by guilt and his humanity. He's prepared to do whatever it takes to atone... only to find unexpected solace in a familiar face. With more insight into the bonds between people than ever before, Ienzo reaches for a dangerous element from the past to help Kairi and Riku in their search for Sora. What is his life if it means saving another, brighter light?

Chapter summary: Ienzo believes his powers may be the key to finding Sora's heart.

Read it on FF.net/on AO3

---

What made a heart?

Ienzo's head was aching again. It’d been years, truly, since he’d been a scholar of it, as he’d told Sora. Seeing the annals of their old research--and all the implications therein--wasn’t helping. Truly, after all that had happened, they understood almost nothing--but they understood more than the guardians, which was why they were useful.

He had a heart, now.

The rush of trying to find a body for Roxas had left him with little time to consider the impacts of being Ienzo. The tides of emotion, as much as he tried to keep them at bay, were always threatening him. He didn’t have time to drown, to fall apart--nor did he want to. Being here was humiliating enough.

The neophytes had all wanted hearts, humanity, in the Organization days. But Zexion hadn’t, not for a heartbeat (ha ha). A Nobody’s mind, for him, had been largely stabilizing--he had the wherewithal to realize that now. It tamped down on the ever-present anxiety, reduced the ache of old traumas. Let him think clearly, cleanly.

Let him commit atrocities.

Was this who he really was, below it all? True, without a heart one was unfettered by inhibitions, societal expectations. Secondly, he’d been completely focused on the morally good since he woke. The committee. Sora. Stopping Xehanort, the one who pushed him onto this path.

Ienzo looked to his left, to the sealed door that led down to their labs. Nobody had the gall to go down there since. Almost as if possessed, he stood slowly, walked over to the keypad, and laid his hand on it. Considering his radical change in size, it didn’t read the palmprint, so instead he was forced to manually type in the numbers--something he did almost with muscle memory.

Why was he doing this? What answers would he find? Perhaps some paper reports which could be of use?

(At least, this was what he told himself.)

Ienzo took a deep breath. Took two. He held out his hand and called for the lexicon.

None of the others here, save Demyx, had access to their weapons. One had to be very closely bonded with that essence of the self for it to remain. Considering he’d had it twelve years, it was only suitable he had it still. This object, on its own, was purely neutral. But unlike Demyx’s sitar, it had changed shape, color; no longer that deep sage green but a sort of lavender, the Nobody insignia replaced with a heart. His psyche was more than a little literal, which was disappointing.

But Ienzo’s magic was limited. Gone were the days of intense, gorgeous spellwork, complex illusions. He was stuck with the same arsenal as any Joe or Jane on the street, reduced from a powerful mage to someone who was exhausted by second-tier spells.

Down here, he may need to defend himself.

He turned on his gummiphone’s flashlight, set it in his pocket. The white light was cold. Power still ran down here, though more so in an emergency capacity. He walked down, and down, and down that ramp, dreading the walk up, because to his newly-weakened form, it was bound to be exhausting.

What was he looking to find?

There was no darkness here anymore. The basement was just a basement, and the only smell that existed was must and likely mold. He realized he was breathing hard. A thin film of memory played over his consciousness; talking with their victims, as a child, manipulating them into revealing information which would promptly be used to break them. It took little to make or break a heart.

Worse, he remembered such manipulations giving him a sort of pleasure. Not much had come easily to him as a child, and he was praised endlessly for this work, a praise which bolstered his anxiety.

Was it really Xehanort that made him this? He tried to think. There had been a time when he, as a young man, insisted on spending time with Ienzo, playing endless games of chess (which Ienzo had hated, and still did). In between this, he did recall Xehanort asking him to speak to Ansem regarding the construction of this very lab. As his son, Ienzo held an enormous influence over the king. Ask him for the world, and he’ll give it to you on a string , Xehanort had said, his voice like gravel. This is for the greater good.

He scoffed aloud. All it did was wreak a legacy of suffering all the World over. How many worlds had fallen? How many people had simply died? He didn’t even know.

Ienzo took another breath and faced the lab. The containment cells were all the same as he remembered, some of them having gouge marks in the floor from their victims’ transformations. Stuffing of mattresses everywhere, mirrors shattered.

He was not here to gawk. He was here to gather data. He forced himself to walk past all these rooms towards the offices.

The place was a wreck, papers scattered and torn everywhere. He knelt and began sweeping them together. He should’ve brought a bag; there was no way he could read it all quickly enough for it to enter the lexicon.

Behind him he heard something like a whisper. Ienzo turned and saw the Heartless, its gold eyes bulging. He groaned. Heartless were much fewer than they used to be, but that didn’t mean they were gone. Darkness, after all, still existed. Slowly, he stood. “Alright,” he muttered. “Let’s see what I can still do.”

Fira and Thundara seemed to do nothing to the Novashadow’s defenses; all it did was make the creature angry. It hissed and scrambled towards him. What a stupid room to cast a spell in; Ienzo would have to pass it to get through the only exit. So much for being a master tactician. Even an idiot wouldn’t make this mistake. He tried to launch a Stopra spell at it, but all it did was slow it down. Is my magic really this terrible, or is this thing just bizarrely strong? He had no clue. He tried to force his way past it, but its claw scratched his left arm, grabbing it. The grip felt more human than what Heartless were capable of, and Ienzo’s adrenaline-addled mind made the connection.

Not all of their victims had burrowed into the realm of darkness. This one had been watching--waiting, for this precise moment to seek revenge. He tried to pull his arm free, but all this did was slice into it further, a heavy edge of pain making everything dull. He chanced another spell, pulling hard within himself for a third-tier. The Firaga made it possible to free his body, and he ran, blood loss making him woozy; using such a powerful spell only worsened it. He had maybe one or two spells left before he risked knocking himself unconscious, and he had to use one to heal his wounds.

Ienzo was weaker than Zexion in more than one way. Zexion had never been physically strong, but he’d at the very least been in shape, able to comfortably run for long periods of time. Ienzo was an academic who was sedentary most of the time. His lungs seemed to burn as he tried to make his way up the ramp. Adrenaline could only help so much. The Heartless scrambled after him. He could see the door. A bit more. If you don’t do this you will die.

(Would that be such a bad thing?)

He made it at last, sealing the door shut behind him and hearing the Heartless beat and wail against the metal, which had been made to contain darkness (this had happened before, during those days). He dropped to his knees. It hurt to breathe, his vision swarming with dots.

Ienzo realized he was still bleeding. He’d healed his arm, but the Heartless had gotten more than his arm; it had punctured his side, and only now did he feel the pain. The wound didn’t look infected with darkness, but that didn’t matter. He pressed his hand against the wound in a vain attempt to staunch the bleeding. That had been more than careless; it was reckless. If he didn’t get help soon he’d likely bleed out.

Which would mean confessing this stupidity. He groaned. He reached for his gummiphone. The dizziness was only worsening. Without dark corridors, it would take someone at least fifteen minutes to walk to him, time he might not have.

How fragile people really are, he thought woozily. He tried to slip off his lab coat for better padding, but this meant he had to let go of the pressure on his side, and the sight of his own blood caused him to quite literally swoon. He held the cloth against the wound and lay down. He dialed Even and heard the line ringing emptily into space.

Pick up, bastard. But the line kept ringing. So much for promising to protect me. Who could Even be calling at this hour? Did he want to know?

Ienzo was losing time, and he suspected, consciousness. What a righteously stupid way to die, he thought.

---

Something wet and cold was dumped onto his side. He flinched, treading awareness. Even had finally come. But the voice Ienzo heard wasn’t his.

“Ienzo? Can you hear me?”

A jolt of adrenaline and memory forced his eyes open, and his hand snapped up to his throat.

Riku was crouching over him, an empty potion bottle in one hand. The boy’s brows were furrowed in concern.

“When did you get here?” he said dazedly.

“Not more than a few minutes ago--the time differences. I didn’t realize it would be the middle of the night. But none of that matters. What happened to you?”

Ienzo tried to sit up, but Riku forced him down.

“Let the potion finish working. Drink this.” He was handed another. “You really bled a lot.”

He did so. “I suppose I should thank you.” Humiliation broke through his haze.

“Did someone attack you? What were you doing down here, by yourself, at night?”

He scowled despite himself. It was galling to be told off by someone younger than him. “In a manner of speaking.”

He nodded. “Heartless.”

“Isn’t it always.” The potion tasted oily, slimy, but it was making things clearer. “My magic… was not sufficient. I’m quite a lot weaker than the person you faced those months ago.”

Riku was clearly not expecting him to bring that up; his eyebrows shot up.

“I know we agreed to start over… forgive me.”

“It’s okay.” Wound closed, Riku eased him into a sitting position. Ienzo noted with irritation that his own clothes were soaked in blood. “Well, you’re lucky I got here when I did.”

“...This looks like a scene from a tawdry horror novel,” he agreed, wrinkling his nose. He sighed. “Thank you. Truly.” He wished he felt grateful, but mostly Ienzo felt annoyed.

“Least I can do. You’re all working so hard to find Sora--which is more than what I can do right now.”

““Least I can…”” Ienzo repeated. “More like this is the least I can do, after all that. I wish I had good news for you. I’ve been trying almost everything--” Perhaps it was his own vertigo, perhaps it was the thought of Castle Oblivion, but Ienzo thought he felt the beginnings of an idea.

An idea which might help them find Sora. An insane, potentially lethal idea.

“Riku.” He swallowed. “Perhaps your appearance was more than a little fortuitous.”

“Well, we can talk about it in the morning. You’re still weak. You should get to bed.”

“First there’s the matter of--all this.” He gestured to the blood. “I’d have a lot of explaining to do if I merely left it.”

“...You’re pretty level-headed, all things considering.”

Ienzo shrugged. “Must be. I’m sorry this is how you found me. Not very flattering, is it?”

He chuckled. “I guess not.” Riku helped him to his feet. Ienzo nearly fainted again, and while he stayed standing, his eyes must have rolled, because Riku continued, “I should take you.”

“I’ll be fine.” His knees were shaking.

“You lost a lot of blood. Cure and a potion can’t completely fix that.”

“I’m sure you’re tired from travelling--”

“Think I can stay awake long enough to get you home.” He used a water spell to mop up the mess; they both watched the blood vanish into nothing. “Come on.”

Ienzo hated to admit it, but he was grateful for Riku’s presence; he was rather faint, a combination of exhaustion and blood loss making him feel a bit giddy.

“You’ll have to tell me where it is. I can’t remember.”

“Made all the harder by all the collapsed passes. No matter. I could find my way there in my sleep--I practically have.” He shook his head. “I’m sure Kairi will be grateful to see you, regardless of how late it is.”

“...How is she?”

Ienzo tried to think. “Physically well. Mentally exhausted. This is all taking a bit of a toll on her--not that I can blame her. I’m not sure which is worse--to lose all that time sleeping, or to be repeatedly woken to find out it’s been in vain.”

“...It’s early yet. It took Sora a year to recover his memories--it might take a little more than a month to find him.” His tone had darkened. “He’ll come back when he’s meant to. We just have to call out to him.”

“I do not… know him very well, but it pains me, to have him go through all that and then not be able to enjoy the hard-won peace.”

Riku sighed. “You’re telling me,” he said, with a shake of his head. “I used to hate my home… now I want nothing more than to go back to it with the two of them. I think I’ve had enough adventure for one lifetime.”

His droll tone made Ienzo smile. “Quite.”

“We’ve got time, relatively speaking,” Riku said. “You, me. Sora and Kairi. We’ve got the rest of our lives. What’s a little more waiting?”

“I suppose that is wise.”

They made it at last. Ienzo told Riku where he could find Kairi, where a spare room could be found for his own rest. He bathed again, to get off the vestiges of the blood and potion, and forced down a pint of juice, despite its bristling sweetness. He set aside his clothing for disposal in the morning. The only good thing about this injury was that it allowed him to sleep deeply, and without dreams, and he woke up disoriented a little before noon.

Ienzo could not remember the last time he’d slept eight consecutive hours--maybe he never had. He still felt dizzy, but a bit better. He really should spend the day resting and recuperating, but that spark of an idea was starting to burn brighter. He was not even sure it was possible , but if it was, it might solve all their problems. He had to go to the libraries and see what he could find.

He dumped his soiled clothing into the trash incinerator.

“Zo! Sleeping in, I see. Feels good, right?”

Ienzo flinched. He tried to remind himself to be pleasant. His handful of sleep helped. “Last night was a late one,” he admitted vaguely.

Demyx smiled. “You guys all work way too hard. Not good for you.”

Ienzo tried to smother the flicker of irritation. “Well, I’m afraid our leisure time must take a backseat to our work.”

He shook his head. “Hey, listen, I work hard now too. Just ask the boss.”

He raised an eyebrow.

“I really do!” Demyx said. “But, it’s like, you have to take care of yourself. Or else--” He blew a raspberry and waved his hand. “Sora… wouldn’t want you to run yourself into the ground.”

Several thoughts flitted through Ienzo’s mind, but all he could think to say was, “Why is it you care?” Even in this new phase of their lives, Ienzo hadn’t exactly been warm.

He dropped his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, we’re roomies, right?”

““Roomies.”” He shook his head.

“And… I don’t know, do we have to be ride or die for me to care whether or not you… die?” He flinched at his own language. “I’m a person now. Empathy, blah blah.”

Ienzo realized too slowly that Demyx was likely reeling from this new life just as he was. “That’s sweet of you,” he said.

He frowned. “Hey, I’m trying to be nice.”

“I’m being perfectly genuine.” It felt odd. “I know I’ve been…” He trailed off.

“All over the place?” Demyx offered. “I think this is the longest I’ve seen you standing still since I’ve lived here. Always running around with books.”

Ienzo was surprised he’d noticed--but why? “I see your reconnaissance skills haven’t atrophied away.”

He shrugged. “You’re all pretty interesting to watch.” A pause. Then, “I was going to go grab lunch. Want to come with?”

Ienzo wasn’t completely sure why, but he said, “Sure.”

The light, when they got outside, hurt his eyes for a moment. The early summer day was warm, warmer than the drafty castle, and he found himself almost sweating. Flowers, more unkempt than they used to be, filled the plaza with color. Ienzo felt tempted to crouch and pick one, just to remind himself it was real.

“How old are you?” Demyx asked suddenly.

“...Why is it you ask?”

He shrugged. “I realized I didn’t know.”

“Nineteen. No--” He tried to think. “What day is it?”

Demyx told him.

“Twenty.”

His eyes widened. “You had a birthday and you didn’t tell me?”

“ I barely knew. Besides. It’s a nonissue.” Odd to realize it. How fitting, to begin this new decade of his life as his old self. To finally be rid of that horrid “-teen” and truly be an adult. He laughed a little.

“...What’s so funny?”

“I’ve been pretending to be a grown up for so long. Now I really am one.”

“What does it feel like?”

“...What indeed.” He shook his head. “I’ll tell you when I know. What about you?”

“Huh?”

“How old are you?” They couldn’t be far apart, Ienzo knew.

“Twenty-two. I think.”

He canted his head. “Don’t you know?”

“Well, I, uh.” He laughed awkwardly and knotted his hands. “How do I put this-- I kind of don’t remember anything.”

Ienzo stopped in his tracks.

“So what are you feeling like? Cause I found this bomb noodle place--”

“Demyx.”

He turned. His face was red.

“I figured…” Ienzo blinked. “Much like Lea uses his old name indiscriminately… but… you don’t remember your old name, do you?”

Slowly, he shook his head. “Even tried to track it down in the Organization’s old files. No dice. It’s all--” He drew a finger across his throat. “Redacted.”

Suddenly Demyx’s previous hesitation to become human made a whole lot more sense. To be a Nobody meant one was strong-willed… a strong will was typically born of pain and hardship. He must not have wanted to risk remembering. “Oh… why didn’t you say something?”

He gave Ienzo a look. “I’m pretty sure this is the longest conversation you and I have had since we’ve been here.”

He had a point. Ienzo turned back to the road. “I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

“...I’m afraid I was judging your choices rather harshly. But in context… it was quite sensible of you.”

His tone darkened, and he looked away. “That’s me,” he said softly. “Sensible Demyx. I mean…” He exhaled. “Why do you think I didn’t go home?”

“I figured your world might still be sleeping.”

“For all I know, it might be.” He bit his lip. “I’ve had worse digs, you know? New place… but familiar faces… Got to get my shit together sometime.”

“...Indeed.” He considered taking the plunge. “Are you happy here?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Loaded question.”

Deja vu, Ienzo thought.

“I…” He looked skyward. “I like my job, I like getting to talk to people, I like not having to hide. To have time for my music. Waking up not dreading every day? I guess that’s happiness. ...I guess. What about you?”

“...You’re right. That is a loaded question.”

Demyx smiled. “Thought you’d be happy, though. You and your dads all in one place.”

He flinched.

“What? Did I say something?”

“I’m afraid our… relationships are rather… complicated, at the moment.”

This wasn’t enough to satisfy him. “Like… how?”

Ienzo found himself wanting to tell him, if so to at least say the words aloud and make them real. At the same time… should he open this one small vein in himself… what else might come out?

“Too personal?” Demyx prompted.

“Of a sort, but…” It took a lot of work. “They… they betrayed me.”

“...How?”

“Ansem the Wise is my adoptive father.”

“...I know that. Guy barely shuts up about you. Thinks the sun shines out your ass.”

“Even, Dilan, Aeleus. Braig too, I suppose, but he’s not here. They… took Ansem, their friend, their king … and forced him into the realm of darkness for the sake of continuing the experiments.” His hands were trembling.

“And then they lied to you about it,” Demyx said slowly, with revelation. “... “They told me you’d gone mad.””

“You have a… rather good memory for dialogue.”

He shrugged. “I’m sorry.”

“You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“I’m still sorry. And now you gotta live with the guys, work with them. Yikes. Big yikes.”

“Perhaps once this Sora business is settled, I will hash things out with them.”

“Tear ‘em new ones. I’ll help.”

This was meant to make him laugh, and it did, chasing away the lump in his throat.

“...You have a nice laugh. I don’t think I’ve ever heard it.”

Ienzo felt the blood rush to his face. “You needn’t flatter me.”

“I meant it.” He winked. “Now, really, what do you want to eat? I’m starving.”

---

Ienzo was still dizzy. The sensible thing to do would be to go to Even, admit his blunder and that he’d needed to be rescued, and have himself examined. Instead, he tried to sit often and ply himself with fluids. Irritating, to constantly have to duck out to relieve himself, but better than the alternative.

He found Riku later that day. Riku, of all people, would understand where he was coming from, was the least likely to say he was losing his mind. He messaged him and found him sitting in one of the castle gardens, with Kairi.

Much like the rest of the castle, the gardens too were in disrepair, overgrown or dying, but for the first time Ienzo noticed differences. Things had been pruned, bags of weeds sat waiting for disposal. Was it Kairi who was doing this, in her spare time? He didn’t know who else would care.

“There you are,” Kairi said. “Come sit outside. It’s nice.” Odd to see them out of their adventuring clothes, in clothes normal teenagers might wear; Ienzo realized he, too, probably looked strange without the frame of his black or white jackets.

In another life we might have really been friends, he thought. “It is, isn’t it?” he said, neutrally. He joined them at the small wrought iron table. They were drinking iced tea; Kairi offered him some.

“Happy birthday, by the way,” Kairi said.

Ienzo huffed. “I suppose Demyx told you.”

Riku laughed a little. “He… certainly is a character. Thought so ever since I spoke to him in the Keyblade Graveyard.”

He shook his head. “An unanticipated addition to our plan, but ended up being a necessary one. Who would’ve thought.”

“He’s been pretty nice to me,” Kairi said, swishing the liquid around in her glass. “I think he’s lonely.”

“I’m afraid I haven’t been an inviting host.” Ienzo sighed.

“A lot on your mind,” Riku said.

“Putting it lightly. Though… I believe I may have stumbled upon something that may be of use.”

The shift in their energies was instant and complete; Kairi’s expression became sharper.

“You recall… in the Organization days, we all had an elemental attribute. Riku, I’m afraid you know this all too well.” He realized his hands were shaking, and he rested them in his lap, out of sight. “I could create complex, sensorily intense illusions. I created these illusions from the memories of my adversaries… as well as my own.”

They were both silent, their attention rapt. It was hard to look at them.

“I was curious to see if… I could somehow regain and use this power to help trace Sora’s heart. Naminé’s power functioned similarly. It’s nothing I’ve ever done… but it’s something I’d be willing to try. With my knowledge of the heart, I feel like… it’s at the very least worth a shot.”

“But you don’t have that power any more, do you?” Riku asked. “I don’t want you to give up your humanity again just for Sora.”

“I’m sure he’d say the same,” Kairi added.

“Oh, I don’t intend to.” Though would that be the worst thing? To let go of this pain but still be of use, still be able to atone? “I was hoping to see if I could… find it independently. Train it, so to speak. I’m not sure it’s possible… but I would very much like to try.”

“If you think it’s a good idea, then I trust you,” Kairi said. Her wide blue eyes telegraphed hope.

How had he earned that trust? Ienzo tried to keep his expression neutral, all-knowing. “That’s all well and good--seeing as I’d likely have to see your memories. Riku can attest to this--it’s not a pleasant sensation.” He touched his chest. “You two are so closely linked. If I can trace the chains of your memory, maybe I can find his--which would give us some insight as to what’s going on with him.”

“I have nothing to hide,” she said fervently. “I’m in.”

Riku seemed a bit skeptical. “Is it possible?”

“To be honest--I’m not sure. I truly hope so.”

“Well, don’t do anything crazy. Sora did--which is how we ended up here.”

“It’s thanks to him I’m alive,” Kairi said to him. “I’ll do anything to get him back.”

Riku nodded once. “I will too. Ienzo. What do you need from us?”

“I only need you not to mention it to Even or Ansem, at least at the moment. Our relationships are… complicated. The last thing I need is for them to get tied back up in investigating darkness or nothing again. I will do this on my own.”

“Famous last words,” Riku said, with a shake of his head. “Alright. But be careful.”

“I warn you, this may take some time. It might not even be physiologically possible for me. And should I find that power, it will likely take a good deal of time for me to get it strong enough to function as I need it to. Meanwhile… let’s keep going as we were.”

Kairi nodded. “I can do that.”

“You could try asking Merlin or Master Yen Sid about it,” Riku suggested. “They know a lot about magic.”

Different kinds of magic than Ienzo would use. “A good idea. I’ll keep it in mind.”

He turned his new idea over and over again in his mind, as they put Kairi back into her sleep, as they tried to delve into matters of her heart…

“Even?”

“What?” Even’s voice was flat, the same way it always was when he was focusing hard on something.

“Our Nobody abilities. Are they completely, irrevocably gone?”

This got his attention. He locked eyes with Ienzo, smoothing hair out of his face. “I should hope so,” he said. “Why is it you ask?”

“Mere curiosity, I suppose.”

He shot Ienzo a look. “Naturally the use of dark corridors is the first thing to go. We know that retaining weapons is something of a crapshoot as well, being extensions of a person’s will. Magic, too, takes a sharp nosedive, but can be strengthened again. As for our “elemental” attributes…” He sighed. “They are the most concentrated essence of the self, a power mainlined directly from the will. A power so strong it can only exist in the absence of a heart--otherwise, everyone would have it, wouldn’t they?” A shrug. “The power favors entropy, which a Nobody’s body accepts with ease--but should a human try to use that power, they risk melting their own cells and organs, spending their lifeforce itself to keep it going.”

“But that’s merely theory,” Ienzo said.

“All we do is theorize--and often we’re right.” He put a hand on his hip. “This isn’t something that can be humanely tested.”

“That’s never stopped us before,” Ienzo muttered.

“Well I certainly hope now to cause no harm,” Even spat. “Boy, I know you must feel different, missing pieces of yourself. But there’s no need for you to seek such things. What would it accomplish?” He turned and softened a little; the strangeness of compassion on his face brought back a punch of memory from the past. Even, comforting him during one of his many anxiety attacks. Even, talking him through the nightmares. “You don’t truly need such power. Fewer Heartless than ever before, and the town’s defense system will care for the rest. You are safe.”

Ienzo considered the irony of that statement, the still-aching remains of the wound on his side. “Don’t you feel quite a lot weaker?”

Even looked away from him, towards the empty warehouse space beyond the computer. “I feel no need to lose my heart a third time,” he said. “I’ve wasted enough time dallying about, committing crimes against humanity. To atone, I need to be human--that much is clear.” A sigh. “Negative emotion is not weakness, Ienzo. It is natural. Useful.”

“Natural.” He shook his head. “It does not feel that way.”

Even locked eyes with him. For a moment, it seemed almost like the other man would touch him. “Does humanity feel… very alien, to you?”

Anxiety washed over him, coolly. He tried to think of something clever to say.

“...Well, I’m afraid that was a fruitless endeavor.” Ansem’s footsteps seemed deafening. “Merlin couldn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. His words--we’re the experts.”

“How frustrating,” Ienzo said.

“Research is frustration,” Ansem said simply. “Until you find that spark.”

Even had turned back to the computer, flicking through a few different documents. The blankness of his expression seemed rather composed. The tension in the room had increased palpably, as it always did when they were together. Ienzo suddenly felt very envious of Kairi, in her quiet dreamland. He walked over to her, pretended to fiddle with her IV, the blanket draped over her. It was reassuring to have an ally, even an unconscious one.

I will do everything I can, he thought towards her. Even if it kills me.

What was his life, to save a brighter light?

#retribution #ienzo #riku #demyx #kairi #even (kingdom hearts)#ansem the wise

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hyunsracha · 5 years

Text

home — seo changbin

word count: 2.8k

summary: you hated everything about your school. even the stupid galas your best friend forced you to go to.

You hated your school.

You hated the long, winding hallways that led to dull, lifeless classrooms. You hated the grey courtyard, meant to give students a place to be free, but only made you feel more trapped.

More importantly, you hated the people. The teachers, people who didn’t care and only wanted you to pass so you could get out of their face.

And the students. Greedy, monstrous little demons who hold each other’s secrets like playing cards, ready to whip them out and ruin each other’s lives at any given moment.

You could only stand two people at your school, and one of them graduated last year. His name was Bang Chan, and he took you under your wing when you were a freshman, guiding you through the halls in a way that kept the hardwood floors from eating you alive.

And you did the same to Lee Felix the next year. He was a new freshman, and his shaking doe eyes made your heart cry. So you took him under your wing, showing him where to go and where not to go.

Chan made you tough, teaching you to stand up for yourself against the assholes on campus.

Felix made you soft, teaching you compassion and empathy for those other than yourself.

They meant everything to you, and you couldn’t really be bothered to deal with anyone else.

But now Chan was gone, and you were a senior, and Felix was a junior.

You always thought that your grim perspective would tear Felix apart, but two years later, he still glows like the sun.

Even when the two of you are sitting in the basement of the school, a cigarette between your lips as you doodle on your math homework.

“Y/N….are you even listening to me?” Felix whined, his brown eyes somehow still sparking under the shitty yellow lamp lighting.

“No, you know that.” You pulled the cigarette from your lips’ hold, exhaling smoke and raising your eyebrow at your friend.

“I was talking about the gala. They’re doing a super cheesy theme this year: Paris. Fun, right?”

You gagged, “Of course they would do something like that. Sounds awful.”

“But Y/N!,” Felix pouted, “We have to go! We go every year. And it’s my last year with you…”

“D-Don’t give me those eyes...Felix! Fine.” You sighed. Damn Felix and his stupidly pretty eyes.

You checked the time on your phone, a soft curse leaving your lips as you put out your cigarette. You were going to be late, and art was the only class you cared about.

You loved your art class. Your teacher didn’t really care what you drew, exclaiming that, “art is everything! Even your breath is art!” And you liked drawing; it was quite soothing. Plus, the teacher loved you and said that you works were “inspired,” so the ego boost is much appreciated.

You were feeling tired today, so your drawing was simple. Just made of pencil, you drew a bedroom scene. Of course, the bedroom was much nicer than your actual one at your house, and you would much rather be in your art’s room. You sketched a bed, big and warm. You sketched a nightstand, paintings on the walls, a dresser, etc.

Your teacher stood by your side, draping a comforting arm over your shoulders, “Missing home?”

Home. A funny little word. This bedroom you drew wasn’t home, and neither was your bedroom where you lived. You didn’t really have a home.

“Yeah. Just tired today.”

—

Felix was part of Anime Club. He had Anime Club every Tuesday and Thursday, so you spent Tuesday and Thursday afternoons sitting in the back of the classroom the Anime Club kids used, getting a quick power nap. Then you two would walk home together, the sounds of your shoes clacking against the hardwood floors making you even more tired.

“What are you gonna wear to the gala?” Felix asked, the faraway look in his eyes signaling his excitement.

“I dunno...clothes, I guess.”

“Nice clothes, Y/N.”

“Fine. Nice clothes, I guess.”

Felix lived three streets away from you, which you thought was weird because you had never seen him before he was a freshman. Those last three streets were your least favorite to walk through, because they brought you closer and closer to the place you didn’t want to be.

There was nothing wrong with your house. On the outside at least. It was quite pretty; it even had flowers in the front yard. But there was nothing growing on the inside.

The air inside your house was suffocating. Your throat felt clogged as you took your shoes off.

“Y/N.”

“Mom.”

“How was school?”

“Fine. How was work?”

“Fine.”

And you were in your room.

Your mom was never the same after your dad left.

You remember that day like it was yesterday.

You were seven years old. Your mom was out at work, so it was just you and your dad. He had spent the whole day coming in and out of the house, but you didn’t know why. You had been in your room, playing with your toys, so all you heard was the door. Around 3:00, he came into your room and scooped you up into his arms. His tears were wet in your hair.

“Daddy? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” You had asked. He sat down on your bed, setting you on his lap.

“Y/N, you know I love you very much, right?”

You had giggled, “Yes, Daddy! Of course I know that!”

He kissed your forehead before setting you back on the ground, “I’m going out for a bit, okay?”

“Okay!”

And you never saw him again.

When your mom came home at 5:00 to a house without her husband, she had asked you where he went.

When you replied with, “Out,” she broke.

She spent days in her room after that, refusing any of the little snacks you brought her.

When she did finally come out, something had changed. She was much more reserved, and the light had drained from her eyes, almost like she was just a walking corpse.

When you were old enough, she explained to you why she was so sad all the time.

You never had crushes on boys after that.

Her job was hardly enough to keep you two afloat, so you sold a lot of things. Your house was almost bare, only having a couch and a tv on the floor. Your room was like that too, the only furniture being your bed and dresser. When you turned 16, you got a part-time job, and almost all of that money went to paying bills.

You flopped down on your bed, immediately curling under the blankets. You never really bothered with doing your homework. You’d just do it the next day and get an A on it. It was always like that with you.

—

Time passed quickly. Too quickly. Two weeks had already passed and it was time for the gala. You were dressed in the nicest outfit you owned. Felix had come home with you and raided your closet, claiming that you needed his fashion expertise.

“Why don’t you have any nice clothes?”

“Felix I have no money.”

“Well neither-”

“You live in a mansion, shut up.”

But you cleaned up nicely, at least that’s what Felix said. You also had to promise him that you wouldn’t smoke at all that night. He gave you those stupid eyes again, so you agreed.

You thought the gala was even more boring every year. You only went as a freshman because Chan said you needed to have the full experience of New Haven Preparatory School. You didn’t know that meant having to watch all your peers grinding on each other, alcohol and God knows what else in their systems. One thing you didn’t know about prep schools before attending one: the kids were much more rebellious. Something about being so confined made them act out even more. You heard 3 different couples hooking up in the same bathroom when you just wanted to pee.

This year might’ve been the most boring. The way overdone theme made you want to gouge your eyes out. There was a cardboard Eiffel Tower and the lights were hung up to look like stars. If you squinted, it was kind of pretty.

Felix was having a good time though. While you leaned back against the wall, sipping on a punch you were 99% sure was spiked, Felix was living it up on the dance floor. Sometimes you forgot that Felix was a dancer, as he never really talked about it much. But when you saw him dance, you remembered all of the recitals you’ve gone to for him.

You become 100% sure that the punch is spiked when Felix holds out a hand, beckoning you to the dance floor, and you accept. You don’t know if you can dance, but you’re assuming you can’t based on the amused look on your best friend’s face. You two clumsily move to the beat of Top 50 pop songs, giggling whenever one of you trips. You were tipsy, and Felix was just a clumsy guy.

The gym hushes when the doors open, revealing someone you could care less about.

Seo Changbin.

Seo Changbin was practically made of money. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Changbin could literally get away with murder. You assumed that was why everyone liked him so much.

After a moment of gaping silence, the party continued. There was more chatter, mostly from people with huge crushes on the senior.

“God, he’s so hot. Do I look good enough for him to talk to me?”

You just laughed listening to their conversations. Felix must’ve heard them, too, as he rolled his eyes.

You didn’t care about Changbin. He had never been mean to you, but he was never nice to you either. So you just didn’t care.

You cared so little that you merely shrugged when he tapped on your shoulder, taking your hand in his and dragging you away from your best friend.

You cared so little that you couldn’t be bothered to push him away when he pulled you into the janitor’s closet and suddenly had you pressed against a wall. You didn’t push him away when his lips connected with yours, with a fire you weren’t aware his possessed. In fact, you cared so little that you kissed him back, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him even closer.

You weren’t sure how long you were in that closet, or where your shoes were, or how many hickeys were on your neck, but you didn’t really care. You just went and found Felix, telling him that you were tired and wanted to go back to your house. And Felix walked you back, the knowing smirk never leaving his face, even after he dropped you off.

—

Seo Changbin was a complicated guy, especially when it came to matters of the heart.

People called him a player, and from most angles, he looked like one. But he swore he wasn’t.

But he never really talked about his feelings.

“Dude, you’re a fuckboy. Just deal with it.” His best friend Minho had said when Changbin tried to explain himself. His other friend, Seungmin, nodded from his spot in the corner, where he was reading a manga.

Seungmin was a junior, and sometimes Changbin thought about knocking his teeth out. But Seungmin could pay to get new teeth in a day, so what was the point?

He has tried to knock Minho’s teeth out once. He doesn’t really remember what they were fighting about, but he punched Minho in the mouth and got a beating in return. They’ve agreed to never fight again.

But Changbin swears he isn’t a fuckboy.

Seo Changbin, although rough on the outside, was soft on the inside. All he wanted was someone to fall in love with. Someone to hold at night and someone to make breakfast with and someone to kiss and hug and just…someone to love.

Seo Changbin was a strong believer in fate and soulmates, and believed that you would know who your soulmate was the moment your lips touched theirs.

So he spent his whole high school career trying to find his soulmate. So he’s kissed almost everyone at school. That’s actually how he met Minho...and Seungmin.

It took him four years to find his soulmate. He couldn’t understand the energy that passed through him the moment his lips touched yours. It was like someone had lit a match inside his body and set all his organs on fire in the best way possible. When you left, it was like all of the warmth in the world had been taken away from him, and he was left in the cold.

You were Changbin’s soulmate. He was sure of it.

Now all he had to do was make you his.

—

School had gotten weirder after the gala. Everyone looked at you, which is something they never did.

“Felix,” you whined, back in the basement, “why was everyone staring at me?”

“Oh, I don’t know Y/N, maybe it’s because you hooked up with Seo Changbin in the janitor’s closet.”

“We didn’t hook up! We just kissed for a little. I have self-control, asshole.”

You heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Your eyes widened as you put out your cigarette, making sure your foot was covering it as the person showed themselves.

“Seo Changbin, fancy seeing you here.” Felix sent a knowing glance your way, not even trying to make his wink secretive.

“I...I just wanted to give this to Y/N.” Changbin pulled out a single rose from behind his back, shoving it into your hand with a shy smile.

“You...you didn’t fall in love with me because of a kiss, did you?” You laughed awkwardly, setting the rose down next to you.

“I did, actually.”

Oh Jesus, you thought.

“Oh Jesus.” you said.

That wasn’t the last you saw of Seo Changbin that day. He walked you to your art class, then he walked you home, with Felix trailing behind. He wasn’t the worst person to talk to, and you actually found yourself laughing at a few of his jokes.

Changbin couldn’t even describe the joy he felt when he heard your laugh.

And this continued for the next few weeks, as the end of winter transitioned into spring. You could predict Changbin’s lines at this point, and it was pretty amusing.

“The flowers are so pretty today.” Felix mused.

“Like Y/N.” You and Changbin said in sync, sending each other sly grins afterwards. You hadn’t really noticed that his hand was holding yours. It happened a lot, and you didn’t mind it. You didn’t care.

You cared so little that you let him kiss your cheek as he left to go to his house.

You cared so little that you blushed when he said, “See you tomorrow, my darling Y/N.”

You cared so little that you walked home in a daze, hardly able to hear Felix’s teasing laugh.

“Mom.” You had said once you entered the house. Your mother jumped, not used to the lightness of your tone.

“Y/N.”

“I love you.”

A smile broke out on her face, the first one you had seen from her in years, “I love you too, my baby.”

And she hugged you, and she cried, and you cried. Your house felt a little bit more like a home, and you thought you should thank Changbin. He was always bright, bringing a new perspective of optimism into your life.

The next day, you decided you would thank him.

You took his hand in yours on your walk home, startling him enough to make him stutter. You watched him as he spoke, and you told him that he looked nice that day. By the time you got to his house, he was a blushing mess.

“B-Bye, Y/N.” He turned around to go to his house, but you stopped him. You wrapped your arms around his torso from behind, trying to pour every ounce of adoration you held for him into this hug. His eyes watered as he placed his hands over yours, immediately understanding what you wanted to tell him. He knew you well enough to not say anything, only turning around and pressing a kiss to your forehead before going home.

Home wasn’t a building. Home wasn’t a person either. To you, home was a feeling. A feeling of comfort and safety. That feeling started following you everywhere, leaving you feeling at home in your own skin.

You still hated your school. The hallways and the classrooms and the courtyard and the teachers and the students. But you still felt at home there, as your home was anywhere you went.

#changbin #seo changbin #stray kids #skz #changbin scenarios #seo changbin scenarios #stray kids scenarios #skz scenarios #changbin imagines #seo changbin imagines #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #changbin x reader #seo changbin x reader #stray kids x reader #skz x reader

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pjbehindthesun · 5 years

Text

chapter 27: carrots, rusty bikes, and troublesome ghosts

Saturday, November 10th, 1990

“What does the coleslaw come with?”

“I’m sorry?” I look up from the order pad I’m scribbling on, not having quite registered the guy’s question the first time.

“The coleslaw, what does it come with?”

“Oh, uhm, it’s a side, so you can get it with any entree you want, really…”

“So can I just order coleslaw?”

“Well, I don’t think we sell it separately, I think it comes on the side of whatever you order.”

“Okay, how much for just a side of coleslaw then?”

This is it. I’ve died. I’ve died and gone to hell where my punishment for being a horrible human being is to be stuck in a permanently looping, restaurant-themed version of “Who’s on First.” Welcome back to work, Cora. With tremendous effort, I try again in my most patient customer-service voice.

“I don’t think I can get you just a side of coleslaw. Can I get you something else? Maybe something that comes with coleslaw?”

“I really don’t want anything else. I just want coleslaw.”

“Okay… but sir, it’s really the smallest possible portion, it’s just a little metal cup with three bites’ worth of salad.” I hold up my hands and make a circle shape with my fingers about the size of a half dollar coin, trying to impress upon this nitwit the concept of a fucking side of coleslaw.

“Fine,” he sighs, and it takes every ounce of my restraint not to stab one of my own eyes out with my pencil, “can I get it on the side of some fries?”

Fries. Are. Also. A. Side. Someone please kill me. You know what? Fuck it. Fine. I surrender and jot down “kill me now” on my notepad next to a sketch of a little dagger dripping blood.

“Wait, what’s actually in the coleslaw?”

As tempted as I am to do my best Charlton Heston Soylent Green impersonation to run this asshole out of my restaurant, I draw a deep breath and begin a faithful recitation of the ingredients in the most common side dish in America. “Cabbage, carrots, mayo…”

“Oh, I don’t like carrots.”

“So… you don’t want the coleslaw?”

“No, I do, I just don’t want the carrots.”

“Okay, but… it’s just that… we buy the coleslaw as a mix, sir. The carrots are just part of it.”

“If it’s such a small scoop, then it shouldn’t be that hard to take them out, right?”

My anger flashes, but then a different voice, more nasal than this guy’s but much more pleasing, floods my brain.

“You wear your feelings right… here.”

The memory is so immediate, I can even feel the weight of Stone’s hand perched on my shoulder, and for a split second I even glance to my left to see if I can spot his fingers there.

Of course they’re not there. God, I’m such a fucking idiot. I haven’t seen or heard from Stone since he literally ran out of my apartment. Not even a phone call, and it’s been four days. There’s only one logical conclusion to draw. I crossed a line when I kissed him, and he couldn’t get away from me fast enough. He must have spent that whole day at my place because Lucy asked him to. And probably because he felt sorry for me, too. That’s all. Nothing more.

But I had to go and kiss him, uninvited, like a jerk. And that’s not even the first time! When I think back to that night we spent at his place, back to that moment in the tree, when I was so sure I understood his feelings: who kissed who? Me. I started it. I was the one who attacked him, not the other way around. He was the one trying to slow everything down.

“Oh yeah, that’s why you came over here and threw yourself at me last night, the overwhelming happiness of it all.”

Again Stone’s old words resound in my ears, only this time they aren’t the tender ones from my bed the other day but the harsh, mocking ones after we woke up together in his. It couldn’t be plainer that I’ve been misreading his feelings all along. Maybe he really did suffer some temporary insanity that night, and he thought he had feelings for me, but it was only because he got carried away, and now that he sees what a fucking trainwreck I am, he regrets all of it.

Or maybe he changed his mind. Maybe he actually did want me, maybe his affection did come from a genuine place after all, but who can blame him for losing interest in someone who’s stupid enough to be cheated on for an entire year? I’m like the textbook definition of damaged goods, so it’s only natural that his feelings have changed.

“I’m pretty sure there’s nothing you can do to make me not want you.”

Damn these stupid hallucinations. My pulse quickens as my body remembers his touch under the hemlock tree in perfect detail. I believe he did really want me, for a while. But we’re not there anymore. We’re here. Wherever here is. So much has happened since that night. And I obviously figured out how to drive him away after all. He doesn’t feel the same way anymore. I can’t blame him for that. The shittiest part is that I feel like I owe him an apology, an explanation, a promise that I’ll stop throwing myself at him, except that even calling him to tell him that much feels like overstepping a boundary. He doesn’t want to talk to me. Message received loud and clear. I can take a hint. I just hope I haven’t ruined our friendship entirely. I don’t think I could take losing Stone on top of everything else.

“Miss? Hello, earth to Carrots over here?”

On the bright side, my misery over my situation with Stone is enough to shake off the murderous rage I was just feeling toward Coleslaw Guy. I can always spit in the guy’s salad, anyway. Maybe there’s a slight chance I’m still contagious. Always a silver lining somewhere.

“Of course, sir. I’ll be back with your order soon.”

Turning my back to his table, I make eye contact with Emily over at the bar, who has evidently been watching the entire exchange with Coleslaw Guy for her evening entertainment.

“Welcome back, Cora, we saved the best tables for you.”

“I’m ever so grateful! How will I ever, ever repay you?” I fawn, laying my accent on thicker. “Oh, I know. You win the grand prize, you get to help me pick the carrots out of that guy’s coleslaw with tweezers.”

“What??”

“He asked me to uncarrot his coleslaw. You can’t make this shit up.”

“And you actually agreed to do it?”

“I’m broke, Em, I’ll humiliate myself a real whole lot for a decent tip.”

“Well don’t look now, ‘cause your favorite riff raff are descending. Worst tippers I’ve ever seen, but at least they’re cute about it.”

She nods over my shoulder, and I turn around to figure out what she means. My stomach lurches when I spot a familiar group of idiots gathered on the sidewalk, waving enthusiastically through the window like a bunch of well-wishers on a dock seeing off a cruise ship. Jeff’s grinning cross-eyed, Lucy’s practicing her Queen of England wave, and Chris and Matt blow sloppy kisses from behind them. But that’s nothing compared to Mike, who pulls up his shirt to press his nipple against the glass in a display of wanton desire, causing the customers closest to the window to scoot their chairs back several inches in alarm.

“Oh god, no…” Emily shields her eyes, blushing scarlet to the roots of her hair and bustling out of sight, which is almost enough to sidetrack me from noticing that Stone’s the only one who’s not clowning around. And now he’s the only one I can see. Standing off to the side, one arm cradling a 12-pack of beer and the other hand shoved deep in the pocket of his brown coat, looking anywhere but at our friends or through the window at me. Looking annoyed, more than anything else. Looking like he’d like to be anywhere but here. Whoever’s idea it was to drop by and assault the window of my cafe, it certainly wasn’t his. What happened to all the oxygen in this place? Why can’t I breathe?

Stone disappears out of sight down the sidewalk, and the rest of the guys, having gotten the reaction they wanted, follow after him. Lucy waves at them before ducking inside, much to the apprehension of the customers who were closest to Mike’s nipple.

“I swear I’ve never seen those people before in my life,” she reassures them with a sunny smile as she makes her way over to me.

“To what did I owe that eye-gouging spectacle?”

“They were just glad to see you back at work, I think they miss monopolizing your section.” Lucy parks on a barstool and pockets the stolen cookie wrapped in a napkin that I’ve just handed her with as much stealth as a thief in broad daylight can manage.

“Not enough to stop by for dinner though, huh?”

“Nah, they’re gonna go practice. They’ve got that show in a few days, and I think they’ve done fuck-all so far to prepare for it.”

“Ah, right, I forgot all about that.”

Liar. Their show at the Off Ramp on Tuesday has been on my mind all week. I’ve been trying to decide whether I should go or not. I’m not even going to bother asking Lucy, because I know what she’ll say if I tell her I’m considering skipping it.

“But I think they were gonna swing by for dinner later,” she goes on. “How late are you working?”

Oh, sure they will. And then Stone will skip off to that root canal he’s been looking forward to. I start reorganizing coffee mugs to give myself something more productive to do.

“Oh, uh, my shift’s almost done.”

“Great! Then you can come by the gallery when you get off?”

“I should really catch up on schoolwork, Luce, I have a paper to present on Monday, and…” somehow reorganizing the mugs has become a game to see how high I can stack them before they fall, and now Lucy and I are both staring at my handiwork.

“At least pretend to humor the idea before you shoot it down, will you?”

“I’m not shooting anything down,” there’s been more than enough shooting down happening in my life lately for my tastes, “I just have a lot to do.”

My friend lets out a long-suffering sigh. “I don’t suppose this is another one of those ‘avoiding Stone’ attempts you’re always so successful at?”

“What? No.”

“Hey, you don’t get to act surprised. I’m on solid ground here! You’ve got priors!”

The mug on the top of my impressive tower slips off, and Lucy makes a remarkable save while I stabilize the rest of my construction.

“I should probably put these back,” I mutter, hoping for a change of subject as I return the mugs to their proper arrangement.

“I knew it, you’re avoiding him. What did he do now?” she frowns. “Did he do something stupid that day he came over?”

Him? No. He did nothing wrong. Me, on the other hand… stupid slut who throws herself at anyone who shows her the slightest hint of affection…

“What? Of course not. He was great.”

“Uh huh. So then you’re avoiding him because…?”

“I’m not avoiding him!”

“Come on, Cora, cut the shit, yes you are.”

“It’s not like he’s called me either, you know. It’s just been kinda quiet for a few days, don’t make a big thing about it.”

“Wait, he hasn’t called you either?” she wrinkles her whole face in confusion. Me too, friend! That’s what I’ve been saying! I’m not avoiding him! He’s avoiding me! I’m just following his lead and trying not to make him any more uncomfortable around me than he already is! Oh no, what if she thinks she needs to meddle and try to push us closer together? Is that why she called him to come over and help me pack in the first place? No, no, I need to nip this suspicion in the bud before she makes everything worse.

“No, but it’s not a big deal, really. Maybe I can stop by practice for a couple of minutes. We’ll see how I feel when I get done here, I’m pretty tired.”

“Yes!” She fist-pumps in triumph. “Admit it, woman, you need socialization. This hermit thing is not a good look for you. Now that I’m on a roll, what about movie night tomorrow?”

“Lucyyyy,” I whine, slumping my shoulders for maximum pathos.

“None of the guys, just us. Pleeeeaase?” Her wheedling drowns out my whining until I cave, not wanting to make a scene.

“Ugh. Fine. One movie, I pick.”

Lucy jumps off her barstool, bouncing excitedly on her heels. “Two movies, and I get the final say.“

“What the –”

“She who wields the Blockbuster card controls the choices!”

“Tyrant! Okay, fine, at whose apartment am I serving this sentence?”

“You always have better snacks at your place,” she shrugs, breaking off a piece of the contraband cookie in her coat pocket and glancing sideways before stuffing it in her mouth, looking about as sneaky as a chipmunk storing up for winter.

“Fair point. Hey, that’s actually not a bad idea, you can pick up Jeff’s pan while you’re there.”

“Whmphch pn??” she garbles through her massive mouthful of cookie.

“Oh, uh, Eddie borrowed one. He brought over some food the other day.”

“When was that?”

“Wednesday, I think?”

“I didn’t hear about that!”

“It didn’t exactly warrant an announcement in the papers. He knew I was sick, he brought dinner over, we ate it, he left.” I shrug.

“That’s really sweet of him. What did you guys talk about?” She frowns before demolishing the rest of her treat. Why is she so interested in Eddie coming over to hang out? It’s not a big deal.

“We didn’t.”

“What do you mean, ‘we didn’t’?”

“I mean, it’s Eddie, he’s sorta the silent type.”

“Hmph,” she mutters, tossing the crumpled up napkin at my head and forming an exaggerated pout. “You don’t tell me anything anymore, you know that? I’ll see you in a little bit!”

As I watch her leave, I feel a twinge of remorse for keeping her at arm’s length lately. It’s not like I don’t want to spend time with my best friend, but it’s in her nature to want to talk about absolutely everything in excruciating detail, and what’s there to say? I was dumb enough to get strung along by Alex for an entire year, I’ve completely screwed up my entire friendship with Stone, and I don’t even understand what’s so newsworthy about a silent dinner with my neighbor.

Suddenly, tweezing carrots out of coleslaw sounds like a more manageable task than understanding my own social life.

***

“FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK FUCK!”

Mike’s outburst drowns out the dissonant sound of everyone cutting their own playing short. I share a quick glance with Chris, who looks amused more than anything as he takes the interruption to justify a beer break. Jeff’s scowling at his bass, and Matt’s got the patient expression of a saint as he rests his sticks on his snare to watch the guitarist jumping up and down.

“Mike… mellow, man, it’s fine.”

“Yeah, totally fine that our lead guitarist can’t count to seven,” I roll my eyes.

“Shut the fuck up, Stone, it’s your fault, it’s your stupid time signature. 99% of the world couldn’t figure this thing the fuck out.”

“Yeah, too bad you’re not in that other 4%, huh?”

Mike opens his mouth to retort, but he almost looks closer to tears than actual coherence, so it’s probably not a terrible thing that Matt speaks up before I do.

“Alright, it’s no big deal, let’s just try it again…”

“Yeah,” I offer in a slightly less snide tone, “let’s just go through the chord chart one more time…”

But at some muttered jumble of words out of the side of Mike’s mouth that sound distinctly like “shove it up your ass,” I decide to let Matt field this remedial music lesson and grab a drink with Chris.

As practices go, this is about as un-stressful as it ever gets, provided Cready can wrap his head around this particular song in the next couple days. I’m pretty attached to it, so I hope we can pull it off live, but in his defense, we have practiced precisely zero times so far, and it’s probably the weirdest thing I’ve ever asked him to play.

“He’ll get it,” Chris muses, watching Matt and Jeff take Mike through the pattern for the nth time.

“And if not, big fucking deal, it’s gonna be fun no matter what.”

“Should be,” he turns to me with his face split in a wide grin. “Are the girls gonna show up?”

“To the show, or here?” I concentrate my attention on the label of my beer can as though it’s the most fascinating design I’ve ever seen. Anything to avoid this conversation.

He shrugs. “Either. Both.”

“Beats me.” I really wish I knew, but hassling Cora about the show, or even stopping by Cyclops to try and get her attention, feels all wrong lately. She doesn’t need me breathing down her neck right now… Jesus, no harm in thinking about other scenarios that involve breathing down her neck, though, right?

“Huh. What gives? You guys still not done being idiots yet?”

“They’re always idiots,” Mike yells over his shoulder as he fucks up the riff yet again.

“Idiots who can count to seven,” I snarl, before lowering my voice so only Chris can hear. “Anyway, she’s kinda laying low lately, so I’d be surprised if she shows up, either here or Tuesday.”

“Laying low? How come?”

Oh, fuck, I keep forgetting that not everybody knows. Should I tell him? It’s really not my story to tell, and she’s so private about everything, she might murder me if she knew I told anyone.

“She still sick?” Chris presses.

“Nah,” Jeff corrects, “fuckin’ Alex had a girl on the side for like the last year, she just found out about it the other day. Walked in on them, I think.”

So much for giving Cora her privacy, although I guess that was too much to hope for with this crowd. At least I didn’t have to be the one blabbing about it, though. Thanks, Ames. Maybe if I just sit here and pound this beer, the conversation will move on soon?

“Shit…” Chris mumbles, looking slowly between Jeff and me.

“Yeah. I mean good riddance, always hated the guy and I’m fuckin’ glad he’s not my neighbor anymore, but I think Cora’s still in pretty bad shape.”

“But that means she’s single now, right?” Mike calls.

“Hey, look who finally learned math,” I kick myself for chiming back in, but Mike’s just such an easy target.

“So if she’s single, what are you waiting around for?” he goes on, and just like that, all eyes are back on me. Shit, I should have kept my mouth shut. “The two of you need to figure your thing out and just fuck already, the puppy eyes routine is getting old.”

“‘Just fuck already,’” I repeat bitterly, “Jeeesus. Does Dear Abby know about you?”

“He’s got a point,” Jeff piles on, while Chris’s eyes continue to bounce back and forth like he’s watching a ping pong tournament. “You guys just need to work it out.”

“Look, she just broke up with the guy! You think I want to be her rebound?”

If I’m being I’m honest, I don’t give a fuck what we call it. I’ll gladly be her rebound. I can handle it. I can work with that. I think even being her rebound sounds a whole lot healthier than where we’ve been, or what she’s had to deal with from Alex. And I definitely don’t need Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber here to give me relationship advice or tell me what I want. But that’s the whole fucking point, it’s not just about what I want, I’m trying to give her the space she needs. She gets that, right? Why doesn’t anybody else?

“Kinda stupid to worry about being her rebound if you’re already together, dude.”

“We are not together!”

“You’re not not together, though,” Mike butts in.

“Oh, excellent, the relationship guru speaks again. How about this, if I wanna be used for a bunch of meaningless sex with a girl who won’t even give me her phone number, you’ll be the first one I run to for advice.”

“You say that like it’s bad,” Mike shrugs.

“Alright Dr. Ruth, can you count to seven yet or what?”

To my relief, everyone seems willing to drop the topic and get back to playing, at least for a little while. But I’m the one who botches a chord when Lucy jogs down the stairs and takes a seat on the beat-up couch, because I’m too busy keeping an eye out on the stairwell for Cora to concentrate properly on playing. But soon, we’ve practiced as much as any of us feel we need to for today, and we’re packing up to leave, and Cora still hasn’t shown up. Not that I had any good reason to expect her to be here. It’s not like I specifically asked her to come. I’m starting to feel pretty shitty about that. It was lazy of me to assume that she’d show up just because Lucy planned to. I probably should have called her and asked her. I should definitely tell her I want her to be at our show. Maybe I’ve taken this “giving her space” thing a little too far. It’s been almost a week since we’ve seen or talked to each other, and we didn’t exactly part on the most crystal clear of terms. I’ve spent most of the intervening time replaying that kiss, thinking about what I should have done differently, what I should have told her instead of just leaving…

But she understands, right? We’ve been honest with each other. I feel secure about that much, at least. She knows how I feel about her. There’s no point in beating a dead horse. It was definitely the right decision not to let things get out of hand so soon after her breakup. And whatever these assholes say, it’s definitely still too soon. I’d feel like a total jerk just dropping by her work, or her place, and pushing her into anything she’s not ready for. When she’s ready to talk about it again, I’ll be here.

“Stone? You gonna take up residence down there or what?” Lucy calls.

Jesus, when did everyone leave? I grab my bag and follow them up the stairs and out onto the street. Mike and Chris have already disappeared, and Jeff’s kneeling down on the ground, occupied in an argument with his ancient bike lock, which is remaining stubbornly locked despite his best caveman efforts to jerk it open. Lucy’s standing a few paces away from him, and I spot my opportunity.

“So, uh, Cora had work, I take it?” I ask under my breath, walking backwards a few steps in the hope she’ll follow.

Lucy’s too focused on inexplicably picking crumbs out of her jacket pocket to look at me right away, but she gets the hint and trails after me so we can keep our voices down and be drowned out by Jeff’s grumbling. “Think so. I mean, her shift’s probably already done, but she wanted to catch up on school stuff.” Her gaze bounces up, having cleared the offending debris. “Have you talked to her lately?”

“You did tell me to leave her alone, as I recall.”

“I told you no such thing. I told you to keep it in your pants –”

“– check –”

“– not completely disappear. And ew, Stone, I don’t literally want an update about your pants parts.”

“I haven’t disappeared, I just wanted to give her a little space.”

Her face rearranges into that same menacing squint from the stairwell. “Not calling her for a week’s kind of extreme, don’t you think?”

Shit… maybe I did take this too far. “Did she tell you that?”

But before Lucy can respond, Jeff straightens up in the background and finally frees his bike.

“Got it! It’s that hunk of rust in the bike rack, it’s been there for like two years and it’s fucking impossible to work around.”

He kicks at a long-abandoned object barely recognizable as a bicycle, covered in grime and rust, leaning pathetically against the frame of the rack. I wave goodbye to the two of them as they head in the direction of their building, my attention now caught up in the rusty bike. I give it a good shake, and apart from needing essentially every part replaced, the frame itself seems to be intact. About the right size, too. It’s perfect. I try to pull it free myself, but the bike lock restraining it is still in decent enough shape to put up a fight. This is going to take more imagination.

***

Sunday, November 11th, 1990

“A Swayze double feature and you didn’t even get Road House? What kind of bullshit is that?”

Cora rummages through the video store bag on her kitchen counter, pouting at the movies I chose.

“Call me crazy, I’m just not in a throat-rippy-outty mood.”

“First time for everything,” she smirks, tearing into an enormous bag of red licorice, “but at least you got the right junk food.”

“Come on, not even you can argue with Dirty Dancing. And I couldn’t get any of you fuckers to see Ghost with me in theaters, so here’s your payback.”

“Christ. I’m gonna need something stronger than these to get through all this romance shit,” she chuckles around a Twizzler. “It’s official… we need brownies.”

“Only if you make them. You know I can’t bake to save my life.”

“What’s the old saying? Give a woman a brownie, feed her for a day…” she says, her back to me as she starts pulling baking supplies out of an upper cabinet.

“And at least she’ll have one glorious brownie and no food poisoning from trying to attempt the recipe herself?”

“You underestimate my teaching abilities. Just make your own batch and do as I say.” She gives a banged-up metal baking pan a blind toss over her shoulder, and I just barely manage to catch it. “Here, you make your batch in that one so you can take it back to Jeff’s when you go.”

I know that if I try to pry more information out of her about Eddie coming over for dinner, she’s just going to clam up, so as much as I’m dying to know what happened, I keep the questions to myself. What did they talk about for an entire evening? Since when do the two of them just hang out by themselves? Have I missed something between them, or is this a new development? Does Eddie know about her whole… situation with Stone? Wait a minute, I’m jumping the gun, does any of it even matter? Maybe they’re just two lonely, recently dumped people keeping each other company and it’s completely harmless, like she says. Yeah, right, sure, what could possibly go wrong with that?

“Speaking of Jeff, I feel like a shitty friend,” she goes on, pulling cocoa and sugar and who knows what other kind of baking potions out of the cabinet, “how’s stuff going there?”

Whoops. I guess I can’t complain about Cora not telling me anything lately, can I? I haven’t exactly opened up to her about my latest worries.

“It’s fine…” I stall, pretending to read the index card she’s just pulled out of nowhere with the brownie recipe on it, like it’s going to do me any good at all.

“‘Fine?’ No way. Shot first, then spill.”

She plunks a plastic bottle of tequila down in front of me and slides a shot glass over. I guess I earned that.

“Euggghh,” I fight my gag reflex after downing the garbage tequila, “are you sure that’s not nail polish remover? Anyway, everything’s really fine, there’s nothing wrong, it’s just…”

“Say fine again and you take another shot.”

“Alright! I swear, it’s not bad, he just…”

“Lucyyy? What did he do? Do I need to kill him?”

“No! God, no, he just asked me to move in with him.”

She clutches her heart and staggers backward. “Oh, the horror! What did you say to such a depraved request?”

“I told him I needed to think about it.”

“How long ago was this?”

“Uhm… last week? Same day as the whole… thing… here.” I wave my hand around the apartment, still not sure if we’re at the point in her mourning process where I can mention Alex by name or if I should keep pretending he never existed. So far she hasn’t brought him up, so I’ve been taking cues from her.

“And you haven’t talked about it since then? Jesus, you’re an ice queen. Poor guy.”

“Oh, it’s even weirder than that, he seems to think we talked about it once before, but I can’t even remember. I’m the world’s worst girlfriend.”

“Here, see this list of dry stuff? Measure, then mix.” She hands me a whisk and a big bowl, and I try to imitate what she’s doing with her own batch but I can’t help getting flour everywhere and have to pause for another shot just to get my bearings. Cora follows suit. “You’re definitely not the world’s worst girlfriend, I think that title belongs… elsewhere. But he probably deserves an answer soon, don’t you think?”

“I just…”

“SUGAR!”

“What?” Her shout makes me spill even more of the white substance I’m doing a sloppy job of measuring.

“One and a quarter cups sugar, Lucy, you’re pouring out salt!”

“Oh, for the love of…”

Cora bursts out laughing and produces a funnel with which to pour my mountain of salt back into the canister. “You were saying?”

“I don’t know, things are just really good right now, and I don’t see any reason to change them. I really like having my own place.”

My chest feels instantly lighter, having expressed the worry to the one person who probably won’t judge me for feeling it. It’s got nothing to do with Jeff. Jeff’s amazing. So amazing that I’m constantly wondering when something’s going to go terribly wrong and screw up our entire relationship, because I have no previous evidence to suggest that relationships ever last this long without something getting screwed up. Cora thinks for a long moment before handing me the jar of actual sugar.

“Sure, that makes perfect sense. I kind of envy you, honestly, having your own apartment and being able to keep just that little bit of distance. I never really figured that out. If that’s what you need, that doesn’t make you the world’s worst girlfriend.”

“Not talking to him about it kinda does, though.”

“Maybe a little. What’s his plan, though? Does he want you to move into his place or does he want to move downstairs?”

“We haven’t talked about it, I have no clue.”

“Hey, watch what you’re doing, you’re getting eggshell in the batter… and what about Eddie?”

Eddie again, huh? Even apart from the very salient point she’s just raised about my situation, it’s weird that she thought of him before I did. She’s definitely got him on the brain…

“Ugh, shit, I have no idea. I can’t ask him to move out, that would be cruel. He doesn’t know anyone else here yet! And I bet he can’t afford a place of his own.”

“I didn’t say it was a reason not to, I was just wondering if you’d thought about it. And yeah, I don’t know how anyone our age manages not to have a roommate. You corporate fat-cat types with your fancy job things and your big bloated paychecks and your bejeweled monocles, you sicken me. I’m gonna have to start selling plasma soon if I don’t figure out a better way to afford this place by myself.”

“Maybe I should just move in with you, that would solve things.”

“Somewhat undercuts your argument about liking having the apartment all to yourself, though.”

“Ooh, logic, that definitely earns a shot. Maybe a double.”

We go several more rounds debating my boyfriend dilemma, and even though we don’t come up with an answer, it feels good to talk to her about it. I probably shouldn’t have waited so long, but it felt selfish to bring it up with everything going on in her life. If it bothers her, though, she isn’t letting on. Soon the brownies are in the oven and Dirty Dancing is on the TV, and for a while neither of us have to think about guy troubles, at least, any guy troubles unrelated to Patrick Swayze’s hips.

“Fuck me, I always forget about that ‘I carried a watermelon’ thing,” Cora sputters as she gets up to check on the brownies. “Most relatable scene ever filmed.”

I cackle, spilling a little wine into my lap as I twist to shout after her, “how do they look?”

“Uh, you want the good news or the bad news first?”

“Shit…”

“I mean the good news is, they look like they’re going to taste okay, no thanks to you. But I think I forgot to tell you to butter the pan first…” she holds the pan in question upside down and shakes it, freeing only a couple crumbs, and dissolving in a fit of snort laughter.

“Don’t blame me, I was just following orders!”

Cora returns with a second bottle of wine and her pan of brownies, which release from the pan much more obediently than the solid brick I baked, and we make short work of both the brownies and the wine. We’re just getting to the big finale dance scene when there’s an abrupt knock on the door that makes both of our drunk asses jump.

“DID YOU MAKE BROWNIES??”

Since it’s my dumbass boyfriend’s voice bellowing at the door, I’m the one who gets up to answer it, and sure enough, there’s Jeff, flanked by Eddie and Mike, with Stone hanging a ways back pretending to be interested in something down the hallway. They all look drunker than we do, which must have taken some effort.

“They DID!” Mike shouts, elbowing past me and making a beeline for Cora’s kitchen. Before either she or I can say anything, he’s attacking the solid mass of brownie in my pan with a fork, undeterred by the aesthetics. Cora’s watching him with a mix of amusement and horror, and I turn back to Jeff for answers.

“Are you guys drunk?”

“Who’sh drunk?” Mike retorts, confirming the answer.

“We, uh, stopped by Cyclops for a few rounds after practice –” Jeff explains.

“– and whose idea was that?” I ask as quietly as I can, watching Stone fidget in the background and Eddie looking like he’s trying to summon an interdimensional portal in the floor beneath his shoes, as usual.

“– but then we remembered you guys would be here doing your movie night thing, and the food’s free here, which is a vast improvement over Cyclops, so…”

I look back at Cora, who’s already getting up from the couch with a grin on her face, resigned to feeding the inebriated invaders. But then her face blanches as if she’s seen a ghost, and I realize she’s only just now noticed Stone. She hurries into the kitchen and sticks her face in the fridge.

“No Matt? Chris?” she calls.

“No, Matt ditched us after practice for a date, and Chris said he’d be by later, he wanted to make a detour on the way,” Eddie says, slinking past me with a mumbled apology, followed by Stone.

“What part of girls’ night did you not understand?” I round on Jeff, but he’s looking so sheepish that it’s impossible to stay mad at him for long. I settle for a bite of his lip before I let him into the apartment.

***

“Sorry we crashed your movie night,” an unmistakable low rumble says behind me as I’m pulling a six pack out of the fridge.

“Are you kidding? Did you see her selections? I should be thanking you for the distraction.” I straighten up and see Eddie standing in my kitchen, shoulders hunched but barely containing a tight-lipped smile.

“How bad can it be?”

But the sound of Mike and Jeff singing along with Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes answers his question, and he gives a somber nod.

“As long as they don’t attempt the lift, we should be okay. Here, if you have lingering guilt about ruining our evening, your punishment is that you get to take your pan home and clean it, it’s a disaster.”

He takes the baking pan from me, inspecting the caked-on brownie mess left behind after Cready ravaged the edible contents. “Thanks, sorry, I didn’t mean to leave it here.”

Rather than responding, I watch him studying the pan for a moment. I wish I could figure out what to make of this guy. He’s always around at the worst possible moments. It’s a punchline at this point – if I have a horrible day, or if I’m doing my best to be left alone, I know to keep my eyes peeled for Eddie, because I’m bound to run into him. The weird thing is that I don’t even mind it as much anymore. Maybe it’s because he doesn’t expect anything of me, or maybe it’s that we have a weird amount of things in common and I don’t ever feel as though I have to explain myself to him, I don’t know. I’m just… I’m just really glad I met him when I did, and I have no idea how to tell him that without making him uncomfortable, especially since I’m starting to choke up, which is a completely horrifying development.

“Hey, Eddie, I –”

But before I can say anything else, my front door bursts open again, and this time it’s Chris, wearing a wicked smile and carrying large boxes under either arm.

“I come bearing gifts!”

Eddie and I trade winces and then head into the other room to figure out what kind of havoc he’s brought with him. The larger of the two boxes is a 24-pack of shitty beer, which is pretty much par for the course. It’s the label on the other box that I can’t quite… oh my god, he wouldn’t…

“Safety first, Smokey,” he sing-songs as he pushes a value-sized box of condoms against my chest, shoving harder and harder until I finally put my hands on it or risk being knocked over. “Welcome to the dating pool, you’re gonna hate it.”

“Already do,” I cringe, doing my best to ignore the wolf-whistles and applause from the couch behind me. “I’ll just… put these… somewhere…”

“Somewhere you can reach ‘em! Don’t listen to the Pope, you’re gonna need ‘em, it’s a jungle out there!” Chris calls after me as I chuck them into the darkness of my bedroom and close the door, hoping like hell that they’ll land somewhere inconspicuous and I won’t have to relive this mortification ever again. He’s wrong, I’m not gonna need them, they’ll expire before I ever crack open the box, it’s not like there’s a line of dudes beating down my door… I mean, apart from these idiots… and not for reasons that would require prophylactics… oh god, stop thinking about Stone… ugh, I hate my life…

The movie’s already starting by the time I re-join everyone in the living room. Chris is sprawled on the armchair, Mike’s co-opted all of the pillows from my window seat to make himself a nest on the floor, Eddie’s sitting primly in a dining room chair he dragged a few inches away from the table, Lucy’s sitting on Jeff’s lap on one end of the couch, and the only remaining seat, naturally, because that’s how this night is going, is between the two of them and Stone, who’s seated at the other end. He’s got one arm stretched out along the back of the couch and his eyes on the screen, and I’m debating whether I should risk sitting down next to him or find some excuse to avoid it, like washing dishes or lighting myself on fire, when his gaze flickers up to me. In a movement that’s almost a flinch, he folds at the elbow and starts fidgeting with his own ponytail, not entirely removing his arm from behind the only available seat, but at least freeing up a little space, so I take that as a sign that it’s okay for me to sit down. I can feel his obnoxious, beautiful, searching eyes on me as I do, and I do my best to shrink into the cushion, take up as little space as I can, breathe more quietly than normal, anything to avoid the reality that this is the closest together we’ve been since I kissed him. I fold my knees up underneath my chin, hoping he can’t tell that my heart’s racing. Why can’t I just be normal around him now?

“You got enough space?” he whispers. I nod, unwilling to look over at him even though I know he’s still staring at me. I wish he wouldn’t. I wish he didn’t look so at home on my sofa. I wish he wasn’t so cute in a baseball cap. I wish he didn’t smell so good. I wish I could stop cataloging his every distracting fidget with the label of his beer bottle or a piece of lint on the couch. For the first and probably last time ever, I wish I could just pay excruciatingly close attention to Ghost.

That last wish turns out to be a mistake when the main characters start fornicating over a pottery wheel to one of the most romantic songs of all time barely ten minutes into the film. Just fucking kill me, this scene goes on forever! Why won’t Stone move his fucking arm from behind the couch?! As if on cue, he leans over and gives a nervous chuckle in my ear.

“They’re really establishing the hell out of this sex scene, huh?”

I can’t bring myself to look at him again, so I just nod, hoping it’s too dark for him to see how red my face is.

“Wait, wait, their hands are clean now! When did they take the time to wash off all that clay?” Jeff shouts, as if he’s disagreeing with a ref’s call at a basketball game. “YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG, PATRICK!”

“Jesus, Demi Moore’s sculpting phallic pottery half naked, and you’re paying attention to their handwashing habits?” Stone cranes his neck to gawk at Jeff behind me. “You’re a lucky girl, Lucy.” I lean forward to dodge Jeff’s swipe, which hits its target with a satisfying smack.

Fortunately, the rest of the movie is significantly less embarrassing, and although I’d never admit it to Lucy, it’s not completely terrible. Nearly everyone else has fallen asleep by the time it’s over, with Stone and me seemingly the only ones who manage to stay awake despite the somniferous effect of all the booze and sugar. I don’t know what his excuse is, but I’m still feeling completely wired just from sitting next to him. God, this is why I was single all throughout high school, I can’t just be normal around a guy I have feelings for, I have to make everything awkward for myself. That, and I imbue every little interaction with too much meaning, I mean, he’s probably just watching the movie, there’s no way he’s sitting here analyzing my every movement out of the corner of his eye, the way I’ve been doing to him. At this age, I should know better than to let my expectations run away with me, right? I’m so stupid. This is what we are now, we’re just friends, I need to get that through my head.

And speaking of unrealistic expectations, when the whole group eventually wakes up and heads for the door, I find myself idiotically hoping Stone will circle back after saying goodnight just to say something privately to me, and of course it doesn’t happen. He leaves with everyone else, because what would he even have to say to me? It’s all in my head, anyway.

#behind the sun #chapter 27 #pearl jam #fanfiction #fanfic #eddie vedder #stone gossard #mike mccready #matt cameron #jeff ament #chris cornell

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aweebwrites · 5 years

Text

The Monastery Massacre- Ending.

Neuro never felt such raw fear before but those red eyes… And they weren't even looking at him. He had to warn Ash. He had to. His mouth opened after a few tries but then the eyes locked on him instead and he forgot how to breathe.

“You got really pale all of a sudden.” Ash says before it hit him and he also went pale. “... There's a ghost behind me, isn't there?” He whispered and Neuro managed to nod, watching Ash swallow.

“The five apprentices are behind you so that means…” Ash says, physically stopping himself from turning around.

A low chuckle caught Ash's ear and every single fiber of his being screamed at him to run- so he did, with a scream. Neuro certainly wasn't about to be left behind with the ghost- no, the demon and ran with him- but where would they run to? They were still trapped! They both came to a halt before the cliff, the blizzard now a light snowfall, making the spikes far down at the bottom of the cliff visible as well as Tox's body.

“Shit! Shit! What do we do now?!” Ash yelled, panicked.

There was all out laughter now as heavy footsteps crushed the snow, getting closer and closer to them. Neuro thought quickly, seeing the dark figure of the older brother walking towards them slowly, menacingly. He gasped.

“The salt! You have it, right?!” Neuro asked Ash who pulled it out of his pocket.

“But it won't work! It'll only melt the snow! It'll dissolve!” Ash yelled, panicking now.

'If you can't use the salt to save yourselves, what will you do?’ A deep voice asked, coming from the dark figure still approaching them, taking its time as if this was all a fun game for them they wanted to savor. 'Tick tock, tick tock.' He says, proving that it was.

“We can't jump or we'll end up with more holes than swiss cheese if we don't break several bones from the fall, we can't use the salt because it'll melt the ice and we certainly can't just stand here.” Neuro says, looking around to see if anything could give them a way out but he knew. “I'm afraid we're all out of options Ash.” He was terrified to say.

“Shit!” Ash hissed, the dark four armed figure of the older brother just a few steps away now, sharp teeth on display as he grinned widely. “This was all my fault! If I wasn't such an asshole, we wouldn't be in this mess! The others would be dead!” He yelled, stepping back a little, gasping once piece of the cliff broke off, sending rocks down into the chasm waiting below.

“Yes, this is all definitely you fault!” Neuro yelled, terrified and Ash glared at him.

They both screamed once a clawed hand rose up at them but the blow never came. Neuro was the first to peak and gasped at the figure before them, holding back the dark hand with a staff.

'This must stop brother! You have already corrupted the hearts of my students and taken may lives. I will not allow you to take any more!’ He yelled, pushing the dark figure back and they skidded to a stop not too far away.

“The younger brother…” Neuro says with wide eyes as he stood defensively before them, wearing a rice hat and white robes.

Ash opened his eyes then, looking on in awe.

“Couldn't he have come a little sooner?!” He hissed and Neuro glared at him.

'Brother. I see you've finally crawled out of hiding after all these years.’ The older brother asked, standing straight. 'What changed your mind? You were fine letting all the others die.’ He smirked, taking a defensive stance.

'I won't be able to hold my brother back for long. The moment you both have the opportunity, run. Never look back and never come back.’ The younger brother told them, glancing over his shoulder and they both nodded, wide eyed.

'Let us make this quick!’ The older brother yelled, charging and the younger brother blocked the swipe of his claws.

He pushed him back before swinging his staff at his head but the older blocked the attack with the back of his upper hand and punched at him with the lower. The younger quickly spun out if the way but his brother made use of his extra limbs and smacked him aside.

'You've gotten weak brother. All these years hiding from the one you killed will do that…’ The older says, walking over to his brother as he got to his feet.

'You sealed your own faith the moment you went after the weapons.’ Was the younger response before charging at his brother, jabbing his staff into his stomach and flipping him over with it- right into a patch of sunlight.

'Aargg! No!’ The older yelled as the shadows around him faded away, revealing his true appearance.

His eyes were still red but he only possessed two arms now and looked far younger than the younger brother- but then another patch of sunlight came through on the younger brother, making him young too, his rice hat gone, revealing very light blond hair and no beard.

'You will pay for that!’ The older yelled then tackled his younger brother.

“Neuro!” Ash gasped, nudging him and he turned around, eyes widening as the sunlight made the chasm disappear along with the snow, the gates reappearing still half opened like they left it when they first came.

They both looked at each other- before they bolted out through the gates, leaving the ghosts to fight.

“Come on! Come on!” Ash yelled, running ahead, wanting his legs to somehow move even faster.

“Tell me you still have your car keys on you.” Neuro says, right behind him, the fear of being caught by those ghosts overtaking his fear of heights.

“Of course!” Ash says, taking them out and holding them in his hands as they continued to rush down the worn old stone steps. “But we have to make it all the way out to the sea of sand first.” He reminded and Neuro nodded.

After a few minutes that felt more like hours, they could finally see the bottom of the mountain just up ahead.

“We're gonna make it! We're gonna get the hell out of-” Ash was cut off by him being suddenly slammed into the side of the mountain and Neuro gasped as the older brother appeared, hand wrapped tight around Ash's neck.

“Ash!” Neuro yelled, the way off this rock literally ahead of them.

“Go!” Ash choked out, throwing the keys through the older brother, on the ground.

Said entity turned to Neuro with a hiss and he looked at Ash who was turning purple before closing his eyes and grabbing the keys, skidding down the last few steps on purpose to avoid the demon's reach. He ran through the broken arch before, not looking back, not when the younger brother warned them not to.

“I'm sorry Ash!” He yelled as he ran through the woodland below, along the almost completely grown over path way and kept running, even when his legs ached and his lungs burned.

He only stumbled to a stop once he came up to Ash's jeep at the edge of the desert, panting as sweat and tears ran down his face. Chamille, Griffin, Shade, Tox, Skylor… Ash… All gone. All dead. In one night. Would anyone even believe him once he told them? Would they go three to investigate and end up in the same situation they were in? He fumbled with the keys before opening the driver's side and getting in, slamming the door shut behind him, taking another moment to catch his breath. How was he supposed to tell their families that they… He punched the steering wheel once- then repeatedly before breaking down, sobbing. All of his friends were dead and he couldn't do anything to stop it. He wiped the tears from his face before starting up the car. He had to go. Had to tell them. It was the least he could do.

He pulled out onto the lonely road, heading towards Ninjago City, feeling numb all over, as if the cold from the blizzard hadn't really left him. As if it sunk permanently into his skin. He sighed. At least he made it. He was alive. Permanently mentally scarred but alive.

________________

‘You've failed brother.’ Wu says to Garmadon as he returned to the Monastery, dragging the body of one Ash with one hand, his head in the other.

'Have I, Wu?’ Garmadon asked, dropping the body then tossing his head, looking across at his brother whom was shackled against the wall next to the monastery itself, the five ninja standing on guard.

______

Neuro's phone rang then and he pulled it out from his pocket, holding it next to the steering wheel.

_____

'Their friend, Neuro has escaped your clutches. He will live on.’ Wu says with a glare and Garmadon chuckled.

'You are right about one thing brother: he has escaped my grasp.’ Garmadon says, walking over to his brother and forcing him to look up at him. 'But my grasp wasn't the one he should be worried about to begin with!’ He says then laughed evily as Wu looked confused then horrified.

'No. He had moved on!’ Wu protested and Garmadon only laughed harder.

_____

Neuro glanced at his phone for a second then at the road- only to see someone standing in the road then.

“Shit!” He yelled then swerved out of the way, into the sand and someway, somehow, the car ended up flipping through the air three times, landing on its head.

______

‘That is what you think. My son is the only one of us who can leave this place freely. And do you know what he has been doing all this time?’ Garmadon asked his brother who kept looking paler and paler.

_____

Footsteps approached as Neuro pulled himself out of the wreckage, surprisingly alive, save for some deep gouges in his skin due to the glass and being tossed around by the initial crash.

“Are you alright? Should I call an ambulance?” The person asked as Neuro coughed from the smoke from the now burning car and the dust from impact.

“The- the car's on fire. We should leave before it-” Neuro cut himself off once he looked up at the stranger.

Terror was the first thing he felt, seeing the very familiarly styled hair and face- No. It can't be. They were younger and their hair was blond. It isn't the older brother. He looked ashen once he realised what this meant.

______

‘No. He doesn't know where the weapons are!’ Wu yelled at his smug brother.

'So you think. There are only so many places you would hide them and they react to the green ninja, remember brother?’ Garmadon says with a smirk. 'It only makes them easier for him to find.’

_____

“My name is Lloyd Garmadon. You must have met up with my father to have such a terrified expression.” He says with a smile, shifting his bag that was barely covering something golden.

_____

'What are you planning brother? The weapons are too powerful for him to handle!’ Wu yelled and Garmadon turned away.

'You and I both know the green ninja is destined to become the Ultimate Spinjitzu Master, able to wield the very same golden power that comes from the weapons and our father. So your pathetic excuses for your failure holds no ground.’ He says, bored now.

_____

‘No. No way. No!’ Was all Neuro could think. He escaped. He was free. He was supposed to live on to tell what happened there. He crawled backwards in the sand as Lloyd walked forward.

“My father isn't usually this sloppy. Neither are the ninja. They must have let you escape, knowing I would find you.” He continued as Neuro's heart pounded against his chest. “How thoughtful of them.” He says, pulling out a golden staff.

_____

'What are you planning to do with the weapons? They will have no use to you as a spirit.’ Wu protested.

'They won't. But that is why I will use the staff to bring back myself and my ninja alive.’ Garmadon says, turning around to face his brother again, grin wide. 'Then Ninjago will be ours!’ He yelled then laughed.

_____

“No. Please don't.” Neuro whispered as Lloyd looked over the staff.

“Don't worry. It won't hurt forever.” Lloyd says with a smirk then rose the staff as Neuro screamed.

______

'You cannot leave this place. Nor them! Not even the power of the weapons would grant you that!’ Wu yelled, not wanting to believe his brother and his turned students could escape into the world of the living with no-one to stop them.

'Not without replacements that hold a strong bond amongst each other.’ Garmadon says devilishly and Wu gasped, all hopes lost.

‘The seven friends.’ He whispered.

“Father. I'm back.” Garmadon smiled upon seeing his son with the mega weapon in one hand and the body of one Neuro in the next, a hole through his chest.

‘Son.’ Garmadon says then hugged him in greeting. ‘It is as beautiful as I imagined.’ He says, looking at the staff.

“The effects are wearing off.” Lloyd says, looking at his see through feet. “Let's hurry and do this.” He says and the ninja disappeared momentarily, reappearing with the confused spirits of their victims.

Garmadon only pulled the spirit of one Ash out of his body, who was still trying to cling to life, even though his body was long dead. Lloyd did the same for Neuro who looked as confused as the rest.

'No!’ Wu yelled, pulling at the chains but he was ignored.

“Hear me Mega Weapon!” Lloyd yelled at it glowed from where he held it up. “I wish for my father, my friends and myself to return to life permanently! We offer these seven to take our places here so we can be set free!” He yelled and the Mega Weapon shook, absorbing his green energy as it glowed brighter.

Garmadon laughed, feeling as the power of the mega weapon worked. His four arms returned as his skin blackened once more.

'Our greatest fear father…’ Wu whispered, watching as the Weapon brought them back all alive.

As Oni.

Kai looked down at his dark clawed hand before summoning fire, chuckling as his tail flicked back and forth.

“I can get used to this!” Jay says, lightning arcing along his skin as his eyes glowed blue.e

“Who knew dark skin would be a good look on me.” Nya says, looking herself over in a large sphere of water she conjured.

“We get to keep our powers. Sick.” Cole says before creating sharp spikes of rock through the courtyard.

“I agree.” Zane says, looking at the frost covering his hand with nothing but bad intentions.

“If you were willing to change Uncle, you could have been like us right now.” Lloyd says, walking over to his uncle, his eyes glowing gold as he held the mega weapon still, handing it over to his father once he came to stand next to him.

'I would never-!'

“He has made his choice son, and he will live with it. Or should I say remain dead with it.” Garmadon says then chuckled.

‘What… Did you do to us?’ They all turned to Tox who was looking at her glowing green hands.

“You're all the new ghosts of the Monastery now.” Kai says with a smirk, red orange eyes on them.

“On the plus side, you get cool powers.” Jay says, prodding at his horns.

“On the down side, you get to remain here until who knows when.” Cole says and Shade gasped.

“We've wasted enough time here. Let's go. Ninjago won't conquer itself.” Garmadon told them and they all fell in line.

‘Father wouldn't want this brother!’ Wu yelled after him.

“What father wants doesn't matter anymore.” Garmadon says over his shoulder. “Torch it Kai.” He instructed, leading his small army away.

“With pleasure.” Kai says with a smirk, bring fire to both hands, his tail following suit.

'No!' Neuro yelled but Kai used his hands like flamethrowers and set the old monastery afire.

“So long!” He called after them before leaving to catch up with the others.

The seven of them tried to leave- but they couldn't leave the mountain at all and helplessly watched as the old Monastery burnt to nothing but ash.

'What do we do now?' Ash asked Neuro as they all floated before the ashes if the monastery.

'There is nothing to do.' They all looked to the younger brother who was still chained to the wall. 'Faith has decided to forgo the final battle. Evil has won.' He says, defeated.

'Guys…' Chamille says, and they all looked towards the smoke in the distance- right where Ninjago City was.

____________________

(Wassaaap??? So! This ending came out of literally nowhere. I didn't have a set plan for it to begin with but I still liked how this came out. I mean, the weapons were just a filler and literally none of this was planned. I'm just really surprised at myself for thinking this up on spot. Anyway. Lloyd gathered all the weapons and went to the golden peak by himself and forged the mega weapon. It also took him a while to figure out how to use it. It doesn't drain him as much as it does Garmadon since- he's the EM of energy but he can't use it more than three times in one day. His wish to be alive wore off because even the spiritual side of things have laws as mentioned. He had a limited time to find a replacement and do the wish or else he would permanently become a ghost. In the end, evil won and all seven of them rule Ninjago. ~Fin~)

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bonebreakjack · 5 years

Text

The Princely Beast and the Dark Dragon

Ai hates Takeru,, but also he really really can't hate Takeru...

Warnings for non consensual kissing, Ai being an evil jealous little shit, and references to the episode Dreaming Roboppy

First he took his allies. Then he took his friends. Finally he took his cards, the only ones he gave him. Everything single part of him. Everything that extends from him, it all belongs to Ai. Because in the end they were one in the same. And if they were truly the same being, then everything they had belonged to one another.

Ai breathed a shaky sigh as he held Yusaku in his arms. His partners avatar severely injured from their final battle. He traced his fingers over the gouges, the missing leg, the slices in his skin exposing pink data underneath. In a way, it was pretty to look at. But reality was sobering and he wasn’t sure what this much damage would do to Yusaku’s mind. Soulburner and Yusaku breathing hard, both of them glaring hard at the A.I. Duo who looked on with victory in their faces. Ai reached out and grabbed Yusaku who fully collapsed due to his injuries, and taking him into his arms. The other Origin tried to plead for Ai to stop, it was sad really, it reminded him of Flame. Takeru kept trying to appeal to their good nature, it was almost princely like…

Soul burner reached out trying to get up but Roboppi pushed him down none to gently with their foot. Helping him along to his own unconsciousness by kicking him in the head and forcibly logging him out.

“Hey Big Bro…. Is he going to be okay?”Ai looked over to see Roboppi coming into the room, concern written all over their cherubic face. They must have came back from guard duty. They had a special room in the remains of Vrains holding the consciousness of their former friends. “I hope he will be. I’m just assessing the damage right now,” Ai didn’t reveal much more than that, he noticed that Roboppi has been more aggressive lately. Even their eyes have changed with a strange eerie ring of red surrounding the iris. He really needs to check their coding soon, he can’t have them lashing out on him or Yusaku, especially not with him this injured. “Ca-Can I hold him?”Ai turned in surprise as the meek request, Roboppi’s hands held out closing and opening them hesitantly. “No-” Roboppi’s eyes glowed dangerously that aggressiveness coming to the surface in near nanoseconds ready to rip Yusaku right out of his arms. Like hell he would let that happen! Little brother or not, Roboppi will learn some damn patience and respect here. They can’t throw a tantrum every time Ai tells them no. “Not right now.” Ai’s voice broke for no argument turning the former maid bot meek again from fear and shame. Good. For the immediate obedience he can offer something though. “You can however, hold his hand and help me check him over. It will be faster with the both of us.” The little bot nearly jumped with joy, the red near disapatting as they shuffled over not wanting to wake Yusaku. Their features turned incredibly soft and Ai reasoned that maybe he should have Roboppi help care for Yusaku after all. It seems they still have complete affection for him, enough to calm whatever beast now lies with in that seems to turn them into a monster when in battle. Their mood swings are incredibly concerning. “He’s so hurt, how are we going to fix it?”

Isn't that the question of the year? This damage is pretty bad, even with Ai’s help its going to be a while to fix and they have to take in consideration Yusaku’s human body. If they don’t care for it he will wither away in the real world. Sighing, Ai thought what a troublesome partner he has. “We’re going to have to split up duties, Yusaku is a stubborn bastard, so he will live. I’ll watch over him in this world and you go to the real one, take care of him there until I fix him.”Ai threaded his fingers through Yusaku’s virtual hair humming content now that he thought of what he was going to do. Yusaku was in a state of mind that really any suggestions can slip through that thick head. “And what the hell do you mean by fixing him, Ai?” A rough voice spoke up startling both of them. Ai’s head snapped up and he was met with the furious face of Soulburner, who looked for disgusted and furious as he looked him in the eye. He looked worn still, but much better than last time and well Yusaku currently. Great, Prince Charming has returned. “Exactly as it sounds, Mr. Prince~ ” The confusion that immediately took over nearly had Ai bust out laughing almost as if it was bitter and acidic, like stomach acid. Ai almost hated this man, the one who easily broke through Yusak’s defenses and walls as if they weren’t there at all. A beast that turned into a prince sweeping his partner off his feet. Ai tried but Yusaku was such an ice king, and while he did acknowledge Ai, it was only when he died and finally left. It made Ai want to rip out his throat . But in the end he truly couldn’t hate this man, and that was the worst part of it all. He was so earnest, so honest, about his well… everything! No wonder Yusaku fell for him.

Flame had loved and cherished him too, enough that he was willing to die for humanity simply because of Takeru. And Takeru loved him back with everything he had, he loved Yusaku too, if not more so. Ai kind of hated him for not being hateable, seriously! He’s got nothing but petty jealousy to work with here. It’s one of the reasons he wasn’t captured with the rest. He now realized that was a mistake though. Soulburner didn’t take kindly of everyone being well taken away. Which, fair. But really he could have least knock where was his manners?! Ah, wait, he’s talking he should really focus on what he’s saying now. “-Can’t believe you did this to everyone! To Yusaku! Ai, I know your grieving, we can fix this, grieve together. Don’t do this to everyone! I-I may not be the smartest guy around when it comes to people's feelings, but you can rely on me too….” There was pain in his voice, a helplessness, “I can’t say the pain we share is the same, but I can help… if you let me,” No, seriously, what shonen manga did this guy pop out from? He is literally too good to be true. Ai really hates the fact he can’t hate him. “ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!”

“I am.” Soulburner looked a bit embarrassed by that but still had the fierce look on his face that says, ‘I’ll kick your ass for you own good’ all over it. Maybe if Ai checked the archive of manga he could find a character that looked like Soulburner and thus finally find the origin of- Wait, he’s getting distracted. Ai cuddled into Yusaku one last time before handing him to Roboppi. “Take him to the room we have for him and then check on his body. I’ll handle this,”

Giving a cutesy salute Roboppi happily took their master and bounded off. Ignoring Soulburner’s indigent squawks as he was ignored. Striding up to the smaller man, he raised an amused brow once Soulburner realized he wasn’t stopping at all. This wasn’t how he usually did things but to be fair, it wasn’t a usual situation. With everyone else, they hadn’t been competition for Yusaku’s affection, hadn’t been the focus of jealousy since he had no fear of them taking his partner away. It also didn’t help that he could see another use for Soulburner without using him as a hostage. Tilting his head cutely with a bright smile, he almost wanted to laugh again at the smaller’s wary look. Ai knew how humans acted, how they can react, out of all the Ignis he was the best at that. Lightning may have known how to scare them, to rip them apart, but Ai knew what made them tick ...and let them be their own failing. Bringing up his hands, Soulburner flinched as his face was cradled and then pulled slightly forward. Just enough for Ai to lean down and they were touching noses. “I meant fix him, of course. You saw the state of him correct? Yusaku is a mess-” “A mess you made last time I checked,” Came the quick snap. Oh, cute he was growling, Ai wonders if he will bite if he calls him Puppy? For another time. “Yes, I did, for his own good. You know how he gets after all, willing to destroy himself for his mission. That’s why I had to stop him~ Otherwise he’d get killed, and I rather have him alive.”Ai hummed, as his fingers glowed a bit working their magic. Heh, magic fingers. “I’m not an idiot. You had a different thing in mind when you said you wanted to fix him”Soulburner grabbed his hands to chuck them off, only to realize they won’t budge at all. For all his strength, Ai was far stronger. In this world he makes the rules, they are just visiting in it. “True, I really just wanted Yusaku to stop fighting me, maybe even erase his memories of everyone that way he won’t be depressed when I end humanity.”Ai hummed as he tightened his grip almost bringing down his hands enough to make it look like he was choking the fiery duelist. Forcing his head back, Ai look into his eyes and relished the bit of fear and defiance in it. “I’ll make an exception for you, and some of the others, Yusaku does need friends after all. Heaven knows I worked hard while was with him trying to stop him from being such a basement hermit” “Wait, what?!” “Oh, yeah, he practically was chained to his basement, it’s a good thing he had Roboppi, otherwise with how long he stayed in that chair he’d have cobwebs all over him-” Ai was cut off by a smack of frustration to his shoulder. “No! I meant-What do you mean but ‘make an exception?!’ ”

Ah! Now Ai understood, and he let a devilish smile crossed his face. “You see, the thing is, I’m incredibly jealous of you , Takeru. You have the number one thing I really want, my partners unconditional love. All for you, you greedy bastard. For the longest while I wanted you gone!” Ai sighed dramatically and felt Soulburner flush as he realized how close their faces were. “You’ve gotten to be all his firsts too, his first date, his first kiss, his first time-” “Stop, please , just stop!” Cute, even in this form Soulburner was shy about intimate acts in public, or maybe it was just Ai? Eh, whatever. “Though not his first love, Ryoken has long had that seat.”

Both their faces clinched in displeasure at the other rival for Yusaku’s affections. If Ai had been smarter, he could be sharing Yusaku right now if he had teamed up with Takeru from the get go. A common enemy/rival always brought people together.

”However, I got to know you and in the end I couldn’t even hate you, your truly are an un-hateable guy. It’s very annoying by the way, the only way I could truly destroy you is through petty jealousy”Clicking his tongue he shook his head, as if blaming Soulburner for being a good person. “That would have let a sour taste in my mouth, You make him so happy. How could I kill someone like that? So, I decided, You get to stay with Yusaku... But it will be on my terms ” “Wait! Ai no- ” Soulburner let out a squeak as Ai crashed his lips down, using the momentary shock to get into Soulburners head to knock him out. In the end, he really was too easy to get to. A scream was muffled by Ai’s lips until Soulburner went limp, unconscious in Ai’s arms. “Don’t worry you and Yusaku are going to love your new life, once I rebuild Vrains, everything before hand will be just a terrible dream. You won’t even need your physical forms after I’m done.”

He bridal carried the man away already thinking of the modifications he needed to do to turn the Knightly prince into an obedient one. “Guess this is two bodies we’re going to need to temporarily look after. Good night~ ” “Sweet Prince”

#firestormshipping #takeru homura #yusaku fujiki #ai vrains #ai (vrains)#roboppy (vrains)#roboppy vrains #roboppy #Roboppi #bonebreakjackwrite

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theabsolutegorillaznerd · 5 years

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Monster AU fic!

I decided to write an origin fic for how 2D became a zombie. Also, I forgot to mention the date of the zombie apocalypse is essentially a year before D-Day for the Monster AU, so this could possibly count as a D-Day fic? Nevertheless, Enjoy!

Story’s under the cut!

August 15, 1996.

Stuart sighed, his breathing now in time with the popcorn machine behind him. What a night, to be behind the concession stand of the old movie theatre. Not to say it didn’t get decent customer traffic, a few movies were actually playing right now. Not that he was one who wanted to see them, they were mostly either kiddie flicks or ones he already saw.

Stuart darted his eyes to the left, then to the right. It was dead silent, no one there, save for the ticket collectors out front.

In light of this, Stu slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette and a blue lighter. Hiding his hands under the table so his boss or coworkers wouldn’t see, he lit his cig and popped it in his mouth as deep as he could so it’d be harder to see.

Suddenly, there was a collective scream from one of the theatres that made Stuart jolt up a bit. Leaning over, he checked what movie was playing there. Dawn of the Dead, one of the ‘Summer Replays’ the theatre often did. He leaned back in his chair and smiled. He’s prolly seen that movie at least 10 times, he was glad other people were enjoying it too.

“Hey Stu!” one of the ticket collectors, Dave, up front shouted. “You better not be smoking up there!”

Quickly, Stuart hid his cigarette under the desk as his friend turned around. “Who, me? Never! Not at all!”

Dave gave Stu the evil eye, then went back to his work. Stu gave a silent sigh of relief and popped the cigarette back in his mouth, taking a long drag as he did.

A few minutes more passed, then there was a loud knocking on the front door.

“It’s a pull-to-open door, sir!” Stu’s other coworker, Tom, yelled. But the person obviously didn’t listen. The knocking grew louder, more people seemed to be at the door. A cracking sound was then heard.

“Hey Stu, did you see someone lock the doors?” Tom asked. Stuart shrugged his shoulders.

“Not that I’ve seen!” he called back. “Try opening it!”

Tom collector walked up to the door and reached for the handle. Suddenly, the glass window on the door broke, with a puke colored hand reaching out. Stu and his coworkers screamed in horror. Dave and Tom ran to Stu and ducked behind the concessions.

“You’ve seen your fair share of zombie movies Stu, what do we do?” Dave cried.

Stuart tried to make the words, but they never came. He was so mortified, he almost swallowed his cigarette. Instead, it just fell out of his mouth and onto the floor.

Eyes darting, he tried to find a way to escape. Eventually, his eyes landed on the ceiling. Perfect.

With cat-like agility, Stuart jumped up on the concession counter. Standing on his tip-toes, he punched through the ceiling panels and pulled himself up, his friends yelling and shouting for him. They weren’t yelling any longer soon enough though.

Stuart panicked, watching his coworkers below being taken apart by the zombie hoard. He was lucky he wasn’t one of them.

Looking at the pathways in front of him, he knew he must plan his next moves carefully. One wrong misstep and he’d be dead.

Making sure to distribute his weight, Stuart slowly set one hand on a panel and his left leg on another. Slowly, he shuffled across the ceiling, unable to be detected. He almost cried of happiness. He may just be able to get home and prepare himself for another onslaught, if/when it would ever come.

As he set his right arm down on another panel, the panel fell off into the hoard. Stu winced, sharply pulling back his arm and scooting away from the panel. Unfortunately, he put too much weight on his other arm, and he fell through the ceiling, right into the middle of the hoard.

Stuart cried for help as the zombies ate him, despite knowing it would probably do close to nothing. As he closed his eyes for the final time, he gave a silent goodbye to everyone he knew. Then finally, darkness.

_______________________________________________________________________

Stu fluttered his eyes open. What happened to him? Looking around him, wherever he was was in ruins. Nothing but charred stone and zombie bits, with a red-brown sky above him.

Wait! Zombie bits?!

Stuart did his best but struggled to get up. His eyes getting back in focus, he checked his body. He too, was now a zombie. His arms were mostly nothing but bone, save for his hands and parts of his arms. His ribs were quite literally visible, his pants were torn up, showing his leg bones, there was a huge chunk of flesh drooping from his left cheek, and feeling the sides of his head, his left ear was also gone. All that seemed to be left of him was now a bleeding mess.

But surprisingly, despite the missing parts, he didn’t feel like a zombie. His brain still felt like it was there, and he didn’t feel as though he wanted other brains for himself. Maybe his brain still being there allowed him to freely think? Or maybe it was all the zombie movies he had seen back when he was human. Or maybe zombies were a lot more free-thinking than the movies made them out to be? No, Stuart had seen what the zombies did at the theatre where he died.

Reaching over to find his old work vest, now with the name tag torn off, he put it on in an effort to cover his ribs. He also mussied his hair up on his left side to cover up his missing ear. Even if there were hardly any humanoid survivors left, he still wanted to look presentable to, well, someone.

Managing to actually stand now, Stu wandered through the rubble, hoping to find a hint of where he was. Looking behind a huge block of stone, he found a small pile of ashes that smelled faintly of... cigarette smoke?

Horrified, Stuart quickly connected the dots. He was currently at the movie theatre, where he was eaten by the zombies! As he was being eaten, the still-lit cigarette must’ve caught the whole theatre on fire, burning and killing all the zombies, except for him for some reason, leaving nothing but the now-actually-dead zombies, the burnt remains of the theatre, and Stuart.

Stuart yelled in pain, now realizing what this really meant. Now, Tom, Dave, his family, everyone he knew and loved, was gone. He could feel the tears rising in his eyes. Or, more like, eye. Stuart soon realized his left eye was also gouged out, resulting in another contribution to why he was bleeding so much.

Extremely saddened, Stuart lifted his head up, and walked out of what once was the theatre, off to roam the world, hoping to find something to do or someone to talk to.

#gorillaz #stupot #stupot gorillaz #2d gorillaz #Gorillaz fic #gorillaz d-day #zombies #slight gore tw #spoiler- the ending is shit #I mean in how I wrote it that is

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moonprincess92 · 6 years

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A family can be 2 traumatised soldiers and their 30 kids (8)

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Read on AO3

Part 8

If there was one thing her life was lacking, it was friends.

Jyn didn’t kid herself that she was exactly friend material though, and perhaps that was mostly the reason why. She just wasn’t hardwired for that kind of relationship. After spending so long supressing any kind of emotional attachment, getting herself to relax and open up to even one person had been trying enough, but it hit her one evening when the kids were all in bed and Cassian was in a meeting that she… literally had no one else. She didn’t have anyone to turn to, to ask about or to check in with. She had a professional relationship with the princess, but she definitely wouldn’t go so far as to call her a friend. Leia certainly had too many of her own issues to deal with at the moment anyway. She had Aden and Tavisha, but they were still kids to her and probably always would be. They understood a lot, they had a lot to offer, but there were just some things that you couldn’t talk to your kids about.

In the end, Jyn ended up comm-ing the only person she could think of.

“Hey, Shara?”

“Jyn?” the pilot answered in a state of utter confusion. “Is everything ok? Is this something to do with Poe–?”

“No, no,” Jyn quickly assured, rubbing at the pressure that was building behind her forehead. This was a horrible idea. “I was just – I don’t know whether it’s too late – but um, I need someone to talk to. Did you want to buy some illegal whiskey and get hammered with me somewhere?”

There was some rustling down Shara’s end, a dull thud like she’d hit Kes out of her way or something. “It’s never too late for that,” she answered at once. “Where can I find you?”

The whiskey was bought from a particularly well-known source within the Intelligence-circles. While the agents themselves were the face of the operation, Jyn was almost fairly certain that it was actually one particular spotty-faced kid in human resources who was the one doing the actual smuggling. Either way, High Council had no idea and monthly bar nights continued even though the entire rebellion was two steps from death these days. Jyn met Shara in her classroom on the main frigate, figuring that no one would suspect anything illegal to be happening there. They slumped down onto the cushions that Jyn had managed to steal from the haul of an intercepted Imperial shuttle to decorate the room with and passed the bottle between them.

“I can’t even remember the last time I got drunk,” Shara almost choked on the whiskey. “Gotta be before Poe was born.”

“Sorry if–”

“Kriff, don’t be sorry!” Shara added, shoving her shoulder sluggishly. “I’ve never felt so alive!”

Jyn felt the giant knot of tension in her chest loosen slightly. “Thanks,” she said. “I… I realised that I basically have no friends. I have Cassian, but we’re apparently getting through this by carrying on like normal. There’s not even a lot left that we could say to each other because he gets it. But sometimes I think there’s still some stuff I want to get out and I don’t…”

“You literally change my son every time he soils himself, I am fuckin’ HERE FOR YOU,” Shara declared.

“Actually, Cassian mostly handles that job. I only do it when all else fails.”

“STILL.”

“You really are a lightweight, huh?”

“This stuff is kriffin’ strooooong,” Shara glanced down at the bottle in her hands before shrugging and gulping down some more. “So talk to me, Jyn. How’re you goin’?”

“Honestly, not good, Shara.”

The other woman hiccupped slightly before saying, “I joined the rebellion after Scarif. I only ever heard about it from the rumours.”

“The rumours are mostly true.”

Shara took another shot. “Shiiiiit.”

“Although I didn’t get revenge on the man who killed my mother by gouging out his eyes, everyone always gets that part wrong,” Jyn pointed out, hastily. “Cassian stopped me before I could get that far.”

Shara looked like she might have been recovering slightly when she had to go and add that point on the end. She shook her head before handing the bottle over. “I always… sometimes I wondered,” she admitted as Jyn drank. “How you and Cassian had gone from blowing shit up to looking after kids.”

“There’s a lot of rumours about that too,” Jyn pointed out. “Unfortunately, the truth is I broke some guy’s arm and Mothma got pissed off.”

Shara nodded, lips twitching. “But I think I get it now… well maybe, I don’t know if I could ever really get it... but after everything you’ve been through, I can understand wanting to do less. Looking after those kids isn’t any easier, but at least you’re not getting shot at every other day, right?”

“I don’t know about that,” Jyn could recall several target practices where her kids’ shots had gone only slightly awry. “but… yeah.”

“I can’t imagine what you’re dealing with.”

Jyn closed her eyes, letting the alcohol swirl her brain. If she let it, she could so easily spiral out of control right now. She could let the panic sink in, let it crush her until she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, could only scream and scream and scream, and maybe it’s what she felt like doing, but as always she didn’t have the time. The kids needed someone to assure them that the galaxy wasn’t ending, that it was all going to be ok, and she knew Cassian was on the verge of snapping as much as she was. If she lost it, he might too and they would be of no use to anyone in the Medbay… but as much as that was all true, it also meant that they hadn’t really dealt with it at all.

Her chest constricted as she fought to keep the waves crashing over her.

“Yeah, I apparently need a moment,” Jyn admitted. “I’ve done enough talking, I’ve done enough keeping it together… I just need to break down for a bit. It’s going to be ugly, Shara.”

“We all need a chance to be ugly, girl,” Shara told her.

“I’m serious–”

“And I’mmmmm drunk,” Shara added. “but serious too, yes. Jyn do whatever the hell you need to do. I’ll be here.”

And she was.

Jyn almost didn’t catch the symptoms.

“EMERGENCY DRILL,” she suddenly barked, hitting the app on her datapad. The siren blared, loud and deafening, and instead of the usual immediate flurry of movement, it only elicited a few stirrings and a lot of pained groans. Jyn smirked a little at her classroom full of sluggish teenagers, the lot of them having been moaning and complaining all day so far and now at last she seemed to have figured out exactly what was up with them all.

She cut the siren off. She wasn’t that cruel.

“All right, losers,” she said, cheerfully. “If that had been the Empire invading you’d all be dead, so do yourselves a favour and confess now: who provided the booze?”

The class froze. Rivi was slumped back in her chair with a spare pair of flight googles over her eyes and hadn’t moved for over an hour while she was fairly certain that Geron had slept through the entire drill, but she noticed a lot of panicked looks being exchanged across the classroom. They ultimately all came back to the same person however, and Jyn paced slowly until she was right in front of her chair.

“Lahrin?” she asked. “Care to explain?”

“It wasn’t MY idea,” she deflected at once.

Jyn was almost 1000% certain it had been. As much as she loved Lahrin, the girl had been manipulating situations to her advantage ever since she had arrived as a sweet, innocent-looking 15-year-old two years ago. “Look, I don’t care that apparently, a bunch of you all went and got black-out drunk last night,” Jyn sighed, glaring around at her roomful of what were clearly hungover teenagers. “what I do care about is still being able to protect yourselves. The Empire won’t give you a pass just because you drank too much.”

“Easy for you to say,” Lahrin pointed out. “You were totally hungover in class last week.”

Jyn pinched the bridge of her nose. Hungover hadn’t even been the start of her issues that day. Shara had eventually dragged her back to her room around 0500, passed out, her knuckles skinned and her throat burning. She hadn’t been in much of a state to do anything the few hours later when she needed to be awake…

“Don’t get snarky with me,” Jyn warned. “if you’ll remember, I still came to class. I still did my job.”

Lahrin at least looked a little chastised. Jyn sighed.

“Look, I know things haven’t been easy,” she told them all. “Wait – can someone wake up Geron for this?” She waited as Dan kicked Geron awake and Vance was forced to take away Rivi’s goggles to make her look up. “Guys – being honest, I’m not handling the news of the second Death Star well. But I’m still here and I’m still getting through it. You can drink yourselves stupid if you want, but you all have to keep going, ok? If I have to, you guys have to as well. And with that being said,” Jyn grimaced at what she was about to ask next. “tell me the gossip. Who passed out, who hooked up…?”

Thankfully, she got some laughs out of that. “I wouldn’t kiss any of these losers!” Lahrin practically choked.

“Way too close for that, eh?” Kris teased, poking her on the arm.

Rivi just snapped her goggles back on.

“Don’t worry, we were safe,” Vance felt the need to hastily add.

“Ok, I’ve heard enough,” Jyn held up a hand.

These days, she held Cassian a bit too tight. She kissed slightly too hard and pushed him around far too much, and he didn’t even mind. He never stopped her, never complained, but she didn’t want this to be their only way of connecting anymore. Every time she thought that enough time was passing that they could start to figure things out again, something else would happen and they would backslide once more. This time, it was hearing the rumours that a group of Bothan spies had come up with a plan to get more intel on the new Death Star, and it reeked too much of Scarif that she ended up fucking Cassian within an inch of his life on their refresher floor.

“I’m sorry…” she said in a hoarse whisper, once they had finally crawled into bed. He lay on his back in a kind of stupor. By this point, Jyn usually had a few hours before the usual tension and dread started settling in again, but she looked down at him and realised that it was already there, or maybe still there, stabbing at her heart and not letting her go. This wasn’t fixing things. Jyn reached out, curling an arm over his chest and curling herself into his side as much as she could, a leg hitching up over his hip.

“I’m a mess,” she whispered.

“My mess,” Cassian corrected. “Besides, me too.”

She clicked her tongue at the sentiment. “We should be talking, not fucking.”

Cassian made a non-committal sound. “We can do both.”

She attempted a laugh, but it got stuck in her throat somewhere and came out as a kind of gurgle. “Cassian…” she whispered, head firmly tucked under his so that there was no way she could accidentally meet his eyes. “It’s all just happening again. The Bothan’s are going on a suicide mission, the entire damn Death Star, we keep on trying, we keep on fighting and fighting but nothing ever makes a fucking difference.”

“I know.”

“You’re supposed to reassure me, that’s how comforting works.”

“I don’t know how to do it when I feel the same as you,” Cassian pointed out. His arms squeezed around her tighter, his hand sliding down to hold onto her thigh like an anchor. “About 99% of my time, I feel like I want to punch something and the only reason I don’t is the kids.”

They fall quiet for a few long moments at that. It was comforting to know that she wasn’t alone, that she wasn’t the only one feeling like she was, but then again it was jarring to realise that she didn’t have someone to talk actual sense into her. Shara let her cry and Leia let her work, but she needed someone to let her deal and she could practically feel Cassian starting to come to the same conclusions that she was.

“Shit,” he muttered. “We both really need to see someone, don’t we?”’

“You mean a professional someone,” It wasn’t a question. She sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

Unfortunately, the rebellion was severely lacking in well, basically everything. It couldn’t even provide basic nutritional food, let alone a functioning therapy system, but luckily they all apparently made do with the informal help of the medics. Jyn quite famously didn’t get along with any of them (probably from the amount of times she’d defied their ‘no visitors except for direct family’ rule) but she would make an exception if it could in anyway help stable her peace of mind. She at least owed it to the kids to try.

“In the morning,” she murmured, kissing his neck. “One of us will skip class and go ask about who to talk to. If it’s the batty old lady who tried to curse me for trying to visit Ann when she was sick, then I’ll just take my chances.”

Thankfully, he let out a bark of laughter.

“Tell me a random kid story?” Jyn asked then, keen for any kind of distraction. “How were they today, did they behave?”

Cassian chuckled. “Quite a few of them got married, actually.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

He pressed his lips to her hair. “I think they were kind of inspired by our wedding, but Arlo was the ringleader. I caught him trying to dress up in my jacket and when I asked what he was doing, he said he was getting ready for his wedding. He’d roped everyone into it apparently, set out all the chairs, made an aisle, got Danny to be the officiator and Bree and Charlee as the flower girls.”

“Who was he marrying?”

“Oh, multiple people,” Cassian chuckled. “First, he married Haley. Then he married Lyle. He was going to marry Fliss next, but Pero got possessive and I worried for a moment we would have a duel over her.”

“We might have to have a talk to him about that.”

“Thankfully, I managed to calm them all down,” Cassian agreed. “Honestly, it was hilarious watching. Arlo insisted on kissing all of them, too.”

“Isn’t he still six?”

“He was really into the authenticity of the thing.”

“It’s weird to think Arlo was once that little kid I had to take to the toilet every damn time he needed to poo.”

Cassian nodded against her head, but she felt the tension seeping back in just from the way she was wrapped around him. His muscles clenched and she rubbed her hands over his back, shoulders, in an attempt to keep it at bay, at least just for a little longer. No matter how much they distracted themselves for, their issues always came sneaking back in eventually.

“Don’t think about it,” she murmured.

“I’m trying,” he whispered back. Then after clearing his throat, he spoke a little louder. “What did the teens get up to today?”

“Well, apparently they’ve all taken up partying recently, so honestly trying to get them to do anything in class is a nightmare…”

Medic Dhanya Hightower didn’t look like much. She was small, long hair always braided down her back and a smile perpetually on her face no matter what was happening within the Rebellion. She must have seen countless injuries, wounds too terrible to even describe, yet she was always willing to listen. She was always willing to make time, and that’s how after some asking around, Jyn found herself in Medbay storage, leaning against the shelves and talking while Dhanya ticked varying stock off her datapad.

“Jyn, babe,” Dhanya said without even looking up. “it’s not your fault.”

“I know… but my brain still thinks it is.”

“I guess that’s what we all do,” Dhanya nodded in understanding. The woman always understood, somehow. “Do you speak much to Captain Andor about all this?”

“A little… but we realised that while talking to each other was good, we were both too far into this to be able to help each other,” Jyn wished she could get away with only speaking to Cassian, but here she was. “I wouldn’t be here if it was helping.”

“You know that he’s come and spoken to me too, right?”

“We both decided it was for the best.”

“I’m glad you did,” Dhanya smiled at her warmly. “A lot of people come and talk to me, but even more don’t. I’ve known of Captain Andor ever since I first joined the rebellion ten standard years ago, and this is the first damn time I’ve ever been able to actually help him.”

“Yeah, he’s not exactly forthcoming.”

“But he is with you.”

“He married me,” Jyn shrugged. “He has to be.”

Dhanya laughed. “Jyn, can I ask you a question?”

She hesitated at first. It was a natural instinct to immediately protect herself from anything trying to force its way inside, but the last thing Dhanya would do is force. Jyn had sought out the informal therapist of her own free will, had spoken to her about things she hadn’t properly spoken of in years, she knew this was safe and confidential and ok… but it was hard to let go of natural instincts.

“Sure,” she shrugged.

“What’s your biggest fear?”

So many things could come to mind. There were the obvious things, things that Dhanya was probably expecting – that this new Death Star would kill them all, that she would die, that her father would be disappointed in her, that Cassian would die – but honestly, the first thing that came into her head was none of these things.

“I’m afraid that if I break down any more than I already have, then I won’t be able to do my job properly,” she admitted. “I’m afraid that I’ll hurt my kids.”

Her kids, her kids, her kids.

“Wow,” Dhanya rested her datapad on a shelf for a moment. “You… really love them, huh?”

“I would die for them,” Jyn said, trying to keep the ferociousness out of her voice.

“I didn’t realise.”

“No one really does,” she said. “I don’t think anyone ever actually did this job properly until Cassian and I came along.”

“What’s the most ridiculous thing a kid’s done?” Dhanya asked enthusiastically then.

Kriffing hell, where to start. “Erm,” Jyn shrugged. “a kid tried to strangle me once?”

Dhanya’s eyes went wide.

“Don’t worry,” Jyn added. “he’s gotten better over the years. Reno’s only mostly an asshole now.”

“I’m honestly in awe of you, sometimes.”

“Thank you,” Jyn said. “and honestly… thank you. For talking to me. And for listening.”

“Of course.”

“JYN! JYN!” Vance practically crashed into her as they were all leaving the mess hall. His hands grabbed at her arms, nearly shoving her to the ground thanks to the 16-year-old’s weight. Jyn staggered as she exclaimed,

“What the hell–?”

“DID YOU HEAR? YOU HAVEN’T HEARD – HAN’S BACK! THEY FOUND HAN!”

That changed everything.

Jyn had no choice but to be dragged behind Vance as the kid sprinted for the hangar. Specifically the West Hangar, which was where all outside ships usually docked and went through screening before being allowed in. Jyn knew that Leia had been out on yet another mission to try and recover him, but how Vance had figured out that she was successful this time was beyond her. He tugged on her hand, pulling her through the crowds that were slowly gathering, the rebels who wanted to see the esteemed captain return home, and Jyn called out,

“Wait, wait! How the hell do you know he’s back?”

Vance skidded to a halt at the edge of the crowd, neck craning over all the heads. “I might’ve gotten Jessa to hack ship communications,” he admitted a little sheepishly.

She wasn’t even surprised. “Wait – Jessa can hack?” she decided to focus on.

“Oh, yeah – she’s fucking good at it, too! Can slice her way into anything.”

“I’m going to be having words with that girl…” Jyn muttered. A good data analyst she would make one day, but only if she used her powers for good. Jyn had to wonder why she hadn’t thought of teaching the skill until now. Luckily, they didn’t get sent out of the hangar. They had to hastily pretend to be unloading a recent shipment to avoid the crowd getting moved along, but they were still there by the time the unmistakable Millennium Falcon was eventually docking.

Han Solo looked like shit, put bluntly, but he didn’t keel over when Vance hurtled up out of nowhere and flung his arms around his middle, so he at least had that going for him. Leia didn’t let go of his hand, her tired face suddenly with a lot more life to it. While Han gingerly patted Vance on the head, Jyn hastily apologised for being unable to keep her kid under control.

“It’s fine,” Leia told her. “Thank you.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“You let the kids go to Salahar,” Leia reminded her. “Their intel allowed us to find him. Without you, he would still be lost… so thank you.”

Jyn shrugged it off, but it hit her a little to see Vance so ecstatic upon seeing his hero back safe and sound. She didn’t hug Han herself, but accepted him clapping a hand onto her shoulder in acknowledgement. His presence, it seemed, had also brought a sense of urgency since Leia parted ways with, “There will be a briefing soon. Main council chamber. You and Andor need to come.”

“You know we can’t fight anymore–”

“Just come,” Leia insisted. “You’ll want to hear this.”

“Is this another battle?!” Carina was yelling in a panic.

“I’LL FIGHT ‘EM!” Reno punched the wall in his enthusiasm.

“Are we gonna have to evacuate again?” Ava clung to her waist, fearfully.

“EVERYONE, CALM DOWN!” Cassian’s booming voice was apparently the only thing that could get the entire youth class back under control. Their classroom really wasn’t big enough to comfortably accommodate them all anymore, but they had squeezed them all in for this, which was probably the only plus to this mess. It meant that the kids were all together, hearing the news at the same time; they sat huddled together, small ones on bigger kids’ laps, and it was at least comforting to know that they had all come a long way from that first classroom she had ever walked into. But the news of the scattered rebel fleets all being called in from across the galaxy, of a major council meeting that for some reason Jyn and Cassian were having to attend, it was scaring them all.

Jyn didn’t blame them.

She sat next to Cassian on the one table that they had in the room, Poe held safely in her lap. He was being unusually clingy, refusing to be put down and holding onto her pants or shirt for dear life if he was. Cassian spoke to the kids in that calm, yet still commanding way of his, which helped at least a little in putting everyone at ease.

“Look,” he explained. “we honestly don’t know what this meeting is going to be about. Just know we’ll only be gone for one morning and will be back in the afternoon. One of the other usual training officers will watch you guys, it’s nothing to worry about.”

“But this isn’t a normal meeting, is it?” the ever perceptive Trina called out. That caused several others to pipe up and Jade to sign frantically at them.

Truth was no, it wasn’t a normal meeting. But if her sessions with Dhanya had taught her anything, it was that they needed to carry on as normal as possible, no matter how crazy it might seem. Honestly, if the kids weren’t prepared for what was about to happen then Jyn certainly wasn’t, and the only thing keeping her heart from slamming out of her chest was Cassian’s hand occasionally reaching out and brushing against her side. But they could do this.

They had to.

She caught some anxious looks but the next morning they still left for the council meeting, making their way through the giant frigate only for it to eventually be confirmed that every Bothan who had gone after information about the new Death Star had died. After everything else they’d been through it was barely a blow at this point, but Jyn still felt her eyes close at it regardless. Cassian pressed his forehead subtly into her hair for a moment. This was it. It was all happening. They were attacking, and it was happening again, and someone actually had the audacity to ask whether Jyn and Cassian were going to be on the strike team sent down to Endor.

“We couldn’t,” Cassian insisted. “We can’t, you know that.”

But there were a lot of eye rolls at that. She heard someone mutter under their breath, “Who let the babysitters in?” Someone called down from the top of the tiered seating, “Why were they even allowed in here?” and Jyn was half ready to leap up there before Cassian could even get a hand on her shoulder.

Mothma hushed the chatter at once, but turned to Jyn and Cassian while General Akbar explained the logistics of the attack in the background. “While others might not think the same, I do not expect either of you to fight,” she told them without preamble. “You were asked here as it was thought you deserved to know what was happening.”

They’d been on this side of the pressure before. Jyn knew that look in Cassian’s eye. They were incapable of not helping whenever someone asked for it, but this was way bigger than anything else.

This was no Hoth evacuation, this was a carefully planned attack.

“We understand,” Jyn answered. “We can’t join the troops, but we thank you all the same.”

“You should do it.”

Goddamn kriffing hell –

She and Cassian both whirled around. She almost thought she might have a heart attack at seeing several of their kids lurking at the entrance to the hall, Rivi being the one to defiantly step forward and call out. At once, the other teens hissed frantically at Rivi to come back while several council members gave exasperated groans and looks that clearly said, can’t you keep these children under control?

Honestly, sometimes Jyn didn’t think it was at all possible.

“I am so sorry – ALL OF YOU!” she leapt at her feet at once. “OUTSIDE, NOW.”

She ended up practically frog-marching the kids down to a nearby control room to yell at them in peace, Cassian rounding them up at the back with an equally furious look. It took a couple moments for her to realise it was the same room that she had retreated to after hearing about the second Death Star for the first time. Cassian stood at her side once they had all filed sheepishly in, arms folded across his chest and glaring in that way he knew would make the kids cower.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE ALL DOING?” she stormed.

“Look what you did, Rivi, Jyn’s mad!” Geron hissed.

“YOU BET YOUR FUCKING ARSES I’M MAD,” Jyn said.

“Look, we just wanted to know what’s going on!” Rivi insisted. It was their group of eldest teens who had apparently snuck out – Jessa, Lahrin, Geron, Neera, Vance and Rivi – though Jyn had no doubt they would also be reporting back to everyone else. “Honest! You guys wouldn’t tell us, so what else were we supposed to do? Jessa tried slicing into the mainframe, but all the briefing notes were encrypted, so–”

“Bitch, way to throw me under the shuttlebus–” Jessa shoved Rivi hastily.

“I’M JUST SAYING,” Rivi threw up her hands. “We only wanted to know. We hate not knowing.”

Jyn rubbed her eyes. Shit, she had underestimated their kids in the worst way. Nothing was going to stop them from finding out. They were nearly adults, and they only wanted to know what was happening. She exchanged a look with Cassian and knew he was thinking the same thing.

“Look,” Cassian began. “you’re all in major trouble for sneaking out of class, let’s get that clear first. But…”

He gestured vaguely to a clear space in the middle of the control room, and they all sat down together. It felt like a moment to be sitting down for, at least. Jessa and Lahrin leaned against each other, Neera tucked underneath Jessa’s arm like a child still. Vance leaned back against a store cupboard, Geron resting against him with his legs over Rivi’s lap, despite all their frustration still at their ringleader. Ready to listen, because really that’s all they had wanted.

A chance to listen.

“How much of the meeting did you hear?” she asked.

“A bit,” Neera admitted.

“You all know already about the new Death Star,” Cassian explained. “We finally got intel. Where it’s located, its status, everything. It’s currently over a moon called Endor, so far non-operational and being overseen by Emperor Palpatine himself. A lot of people died to get that information.”

“Like you guys nearly died the first time,” Rivi said without hesitation.

Something stabbed her.

“Yes,” Cassian closed his eyes a moment. “The council is organising an attack on the Death Star. There are going to be two teams, fighter’s striking from space and another being sent to Endor to take out the shield that’s protecting the thing.”

“Yeah, yeah, we got that part. C’mon, guys! Don’t worry about us, you need to do it!” Rivi said, amidst more ‘yeah!’s and nods from the others. “The fucking EMPEROR is on that thing, if you guys manage to blow him up you could end the entire war!”

“It’s not that simple–”

“We don’t want you to hold back because of us,” Neera piped up.

“Yeah, we can take care of ourselves–”

“Hell, we could even help–”

“STOP, all of you,” Jyn snapped. They all fell silent. “You’re not helping, and we’re not going! Don’t even argue!”

“But don’t you want to?” Rivi, naturally, just ploughed on without a care. “You have a chance to end this, and we all know how much it would mean to you–”

“Rivi,” Jyn cut in. She stared around the confused faces of the teenagers and said in a slightly more gentle voice, “Look… yes, it would mean a lot. But the thing is, we have shit in our lives that mean more now. You, Rivi. And the rest of you insane kids,” she added, gesturing to the others. “You mean more to us than…” She trailed off helplessly, glancing over at Cassian.

“Anything,” he finished.

It was tempting. The knowledge that the Emperor was there, that there really was a good chance to get justice for her father and to seize a life she hadn’t realised how much she wanted until now… it was almost enough that the kids were giving them permission to go.

But they were children, and they were the adults, damn it. They had to make the hard decisions.

“I don’t get it,” Rivi threw up her hands.

“We don’t expect you to, Rivi.”

Just because the council was planning the end of a war didn’t mean that everything came to a screeching halt. It was Ava’s 11th birthday, which meant naturally they had to have a party for her. It at least seemed to lift some of the tension as they decked out the training gym in decorations and they all attempted to learn the traditional (and somehow hugely complicated) birthday folk dance that Ava apparently wouldn’t accept unless it was done perfectly. After some intense searching on the holonet, Jyn had managed at least to get the feet right and Ava shrieked with glee as they span around together.

“How the hell are you getting this?” Cassian didn’t exactly do out of breath, but she noted the exertion on his face at least as he pulled up alongside her. The man had no rhythm at all much to Ava’s severe disappointment and Jyn’s utter amusement. Hell, at least it gave her something to be amused about. She paused in the dance, letting Ava move on to a different partner and watching her grab onto Magda, swinging around with her instead.

“I pick things up quickly.”

He glanced at her as they took a break from dancing. The kids span and laughed underneath the coloured lights, and Jyn wished she could freeze it all. “Ava’s 11…” he said after a moment, shaking his head. “It can’t be real. She’s supposed to be a little eight-year-old who can’t go to bed without a goodnight hug.”

“To be fair, she still needs the hug.”

“True,” Cassian pointed out. “but she’s not allowed to get older.”

“I don’t know… I kind of want her to,” Jyn realised. She noticed Cassian’s questioning look and she carried on, “Just… this is a war. Malia will never be older than 18. I try not to imagine the kids getting older, because I know it will hurt more if they died… which I know probably isn’t very healthy of me to be thinking,” she added.

“I understand, though.”

She smiled as she watched Ava lean in and kiss Magda’s cheek, ever the cuddly, sweet one. “Thank the Force someone does. So when they do get older like this… it’s kind of a nice surprise.”

She wanted that life for them. She wanted them to have a life wholly different to hers, where it was actually a miracle if she reached her next birthday. She wanted these kids to actually grow up, get older. She wanted to see them hit the awkward puberty years, she wanted to see them slowly turn into adults, she wanted to still be there for them when they comm-ed her at 0200 asking how to wash sheets.

They wouldn’t get that chance unless they won this war.

Jyn sighed, reaching out and casually curling her fingers around Cassian’s.

“I’ve got to fight.”

He gripped her hand tight.

“I know.”

The rebellion moved in a hurry.

It seemed that no matter which way you turned, there was a shuttle heading in that direction. For as many squadrons that were coming in, there were enough also going out to distract the Empire from the fact that they were planning something in the first place. As non-combatants, Jyn got the message that the youth class was being shipped out to the nearest Alliance-friendly planet first thing in the morning, something none of the kids were all too happy about. Considering that up until this point they’d always managed to be in the thick of the action like during the Hoth evacuation, she wasn’t surprised that they weren’t taking too kindly to getting sent away.

“C’mon, we could help!” Azha was yelling, even as she was being carried sideways around the middle by Cassian like a smashball. She flailed her legs as she was hauled up the loading ramp. “I could kick some serious Imperial ass!”

“I know, you’ve only been complaining about it the last 24 hours,” Jyn rubbed her head, warily.

Cassian dumped the girl unceremoniously onto the shuttle, even as she continued to protest. The hangar was full of noise, the hustle and bustle of loading and unloading, people saying goodbye and officers trying to keep a semblance of order by frantically trying to keep track of how many were boarding. Jyn had been attempting to herd the kids onto their shuttle for the last half an hour, even with Ava clinging around her waist the entire time and refusing to let go. “Honestly,” she muttered under her breath. “You’re not making this easy.”

“I wanna stay!”

“You’re not staying, now get on the damn shuttle.”

“NO.”

“CASSIAN.”

Cassian thankfully strode over and scooped Ava up in one movement. By the time he made it back to the shuttle, both Azha and Reno had managed to jump out the doors and escape once again.

Kriffing hell.

“LOOK, look, come here guys,” Jyn hadn’t wanted to do a big goodbye. It felt too final, too much like she wasn’t coming back, but apparently nothing else was going to settle them. She sat down on the loading ramp (much to the exasperation of the officer overseeing their evacuation) and gestured for everyone to gather round her. Bree crawled into her lap while everyone thankfully listened to her this time. Cassian stayed standing, she noticed. He’d been on edge ever since they’d gotten the official evacuation notice, and the folded arms across his chest told her that he hadn’t lightened up at all since then.

“Look, I need you guys all to listen right now,” Jyn called out to the class. “This thing that is happening, it’s important. It could change everything, or it could change nothing, we honestly don’t know how it’s going to go, but we need you to listen. Get on the shuttle. Stay with Cassian. I’ll see you all again when it is safe.”

“You’re not gonna die though, are you?” Haley asked, her face crinkled in concern.

Jyn smiled through what was honestly a lie. “I’ll have Aden and Tavisha with me. I promise I won’t.”

Still, Jyn made sure to hug every single kid that then grudgingly walked onto that shuttle. She reminded Reno to keep his fists to himself and Warrin to keep squeezing his stress ball if he needed to. She had to deal with Bree crying as she handed her over to Cassian and held it together when she clapped a hand onto Talek’s shoulder, accepting his small nod as a warning to please be careful. She tried to avoid watching Carina, Caylen and Ann as their parents came over to say goodbye, much like all the other kids who had parents who hadn’t already left yet to take part in the attack.

“Honestly!” the officer overseeing them spluttered when even Aden and Tavisha came over to say goodbye. “How many more kids are coming on this flight? Because my manifest already says that we’re six seats short, there’s no way we can fit more on–”

“There’s another shuttle evacuating the medical and support staff,” Jyn just rolled her eyes. “Some of the older guys can just go on that one.”

While Jessa, Lahrin, Geron, Neera, Vance and Rivi got diverted to another shuttle (“Jessa, you are in charge, don’t let those hooligans out of your sight!”) Jyn finally got a chance to pull Cassian to the side. Fingers sliding in against his, she let out a breath as they stood together, blocking out anything that wasn’t the other’s breath.

“I still don’t like you going without me,” Cassian said, quietly.

“We both know one of us has to stay with the kids.”

“I know,” he sighed. “I’ll look after them.”

“You better. At this point they’re likely to stage a mutiny.”

He at least chuckled slightly. Jyn tilted her head up and his lips quickly met hers, melting together for a long a moment as they dared. She wished there was more time, time to slide her hands up his spine and for him to tangle his fingers into her hair, but the officer with the datapad was coughing pointedly behind them and she pulled back hastily to hug him.

“Destroy that thing, ok?” Cassian whispered, mouth pressed against her ear. “Destroy it and come home.”

“I will.”

She watched the shuttle take off with Aden and Tavisha’s arms around her.

Jyn slammed an elbow into a Stormtrooper’s chest plate, regretting it immediately at the pain that flared. Still, she carried on, slamming her boot into the joint of his thigh and he crumpled to the forest ground. She ran, trying to activate the comm in her ear at the same time. She’d been hearing Leia calling her the last fifteen minutes or ago, but had rather had her hands full. Tavisha was with another group, but Aden skidded to a halt when he realised that Jyn was pausing.

“Go on!” she yelled. They needed all the help they could get.

Aden simply pointed his blaster at her. Something gripped her throat for half a second, before she realised that the shot had gone somewhere over her shoulder and taken out a Stormtrooper who had been moments from blasting her brains out from behind her.

“Nah, I’ll stay here,” Aden called, cheerfully.

Jyn rolled her eyes before finally calling Leia back.

“Sergeant Erso!” Leia could barely be heard over the shots fired, Ewoks screaming in fury and the occasional explosion. “The bunker doors have been deadlocked and R2 is compromised, we need help.”

“I can call–”

“I’ve tried,” Leia cut in. “All the signals back to the fleet are going haywire, there’s just too much traffic–”

“I’ll get through,” Jyn insisted. “You concentrate on not dying.”

“Oh, Han has that covered.”

“I’ll bet,” Jyn muttered, before pulling the comm out of her ear and attempting to manually patch it through to any of their base ships up with the main rebel fleet. She just had to hope that she got lucky and for one moment she thought she had – but then she heard a bunch of voices all yelling over each other in amongst a lot of shaky static. She almost tried a different frequency…

Except.

“Shit, shit, someone’s trying to contact the ship!”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“BACK UP CAN’T COME TO THE COMM RIGHT NOW.”

Why did that sound a hell of a lot like –

Oh.

Fuck no.

“Like you’re all going to be,” Jyn suddenly snarled down the comm. “Unless you all tell me where the hell you are right now.”

Silence down the comm. Aden stared at her weirdly, before slamming the butt of his blaster into a ‘trooper’s helmet.

“Oh fuck,” the unmistakable voice of Lahrin said.

“OH FUCK SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT,” Jyn yelled. “What the HELL are you all doing? Why aren’t you with Cassian – WHERE ARE YOU – you’re all being black-carded!”

“Shit, we really are in trouble now,” Neera’s trembling voice put out there.

“NEERA – HOW MANY OF YOU –?”

“There’s only the six of us!” Lahrin insisted.

“FOR THE RECORD,” there was a loud scraping noise before Rivi’s voice thundered in, like she’d just knocked something over in her haste to explain herself. “THIS WASN’T MY IDEA.”

“Yeah, you just encouraged it.”

“Vance, I’m breaking up with you.”

Jyn didn’t have the goddamn time for this. Her kids were apparently up there somewhere, not safe on a planet systems away, but right in the thick of the battle. They could be fucking shot out of the sky, what the HELL were they thinking –

“Look, we will handle how much trouble you are all in later!” Jyn barked. Much to her inconvenience, she noticed an AT-AT making its way closer to where she was, and even Aden couldn’t hold that off. They sprinted together through the underbrush as Jyn carried on, “I need to speak to whoever is in charge of whatever shuttle you’ve all apparently stolen!”

“We didn’t steal it!”

“We just – hitched a ride?”

“But anyway,” Geron called out, clearly a bit further away since his voice was more tinny than the others. “That’s gonna be a bit of a problem since our only pilot kind of just fell unconscious.”

Cassian was going to get an earful about this later.

“What the hell happened?”

“We only wanted to help,” Lahrin insisted. “So we fudged the numbers of the flight manifest so that we’d get put on a different shuttle and convince the pilot to come back.”

“And that worked?”

“When we stole his blaster, yeah.”

“You are all dead meat. Continue.”

“Well, we got back but we got hit,” Lahrin said. “The shuttle isn’t too compromised, but the pilot hit his head.”

“Wait, then who the hell is flying?”

“Vance.”

Honestly, these kids were going to be the death of her. They were naturally only doing what they had been taught, which was to always do the right thing and a part of her couldn’t help but even be a little impressed. Of course Vance could figure out how to fly an unknown shuttle with only an indecipherable instruction manual and his own limited knowledge learned on his own time. Of course Lahrin managed to fudge a ship manifest. Next, Jessa would be using her slicing skills to –

“Ok,” Jyn shook her head. “Ok, ok, ok. Hold on one moment, let me just–” She had to shoot her way across a clearing, Aden covering her back. She kicked at a Stormtrooper that was attempting to shake off the Ewok on its back and quickly dove into the brush on the other side. “I’m back,” she said down the shaky comm line once more. “Now listen to me, you little shits. I need Jessa, I’m assuming she got roped into this too?”

“I’m here,” the seventeen-year-old’s voice was quivering and she wasn’t surprised. This was the same girl who had broken down in her arms when Malia had died.

“Good,” Jyn said. “Jessa, we have to open the doors to the control centre that the shield is operated from, but they’ve been deadbolted. I need you to slice in remotely, I know you know how to do that–”

“Using this shuttle’s equipment?!” Jessa said in a panic. “Jyn, I can’t–”

“YES, YOU CAN, because this entire damn plan is counting on it!” Jyn said. “JESSA, listen to me, I know you’re scared. I know you probably only got dragged along on this hare-brained scheme because you’re the oldest and you felt like you had to protect the others, but you are strong. You are brave, and you can do this.”

For a long moment, she heard nothing but static that occasionally cut back into the frequency. She could hear the insisting beeping that told her that Leia was no doubt waiting on another line, but she already knew what she wanted. She had to believe that Jessa could do this. Her skills had already surpassed what Jyn had been capable of herself when she was younger –

“Ok, I’m gonna try,” Jessa said.

She did. And the second that Leia stopped trying to get through, Jyn knew that her kids had done it.

#rebelcaptain #rebelcaptain fanfic #rogue one fanfic #dailyrebelcaptain #ro fanfic #ro #kid fic #a family can be #YALL THOUGHT I FORGOT ABOUT THIS FIC DIDN'T YA #BUT IT'S HERE #and i don't expect anyone to still be into it #but i'm finishing it anyway #if u DO happen to read it and like it pls reblog me <3 #my fanfiction

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marvelsquicksilver · 6 years

Text

The Most Wonderful Time of The Year

Request: @laura-gzz Steve Rogers x Reader going for a christmas shopping day

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Word count: 1658

this is very fluffy and I’ll admit I don’t do christmas shopping so I found it a lil hard, but regardless enjoy!

“You ready?” Steve asked as he leaned over the couch to press a kiss to my forehead.

“I don’t want to stop being a burrito,” I whined as I tugged the blanket I was clutching tightly around my chest. I was watching love actually for what was probably the 500th time and yet in my eyes it was still the greatest Christmas movie of all time.

He let out a light laugh, “you know that if we don’t go now, we won’t go ever.” That was true, the two of us were so bad at organising our Christmas schedules. We needed to do it on a day we were both free—which was almost never.

“Okay fine.” I let out a loud, overdramatic sigh as I pushed myself off the couch and out of the comfort of my blanket. “I wish we could just stay at home and cuddle all day.” I pouted as I grabbed my coat from the rack.

“And miss out on the best day of the year?” He smirked as he pulled me into his side. He knew I hated how crowded the mall got around Christmas.

“Oh yeah,” I rolled my eyes. “I love getting in screaming matches with old women, long queues and endless buzzing in my ears because of the hoards of people.” The only thing I enjoyed about the day was spending time with him.

“Why are you such a Grinch this year.” He frowned—usually I was more of a Cindy.

“I honestly have no clue.” It was true—I just didn’t know where all my Christmas spirit had disappeared to.

“C’mon,” he rubbed my shoulder “I promise we can cuddle when we get back.”

I suddenly perked up, that was definitely an incentive. “Amazing, and then you can watch love actually with me.”

“Absolutely not.” He was so extremely tired of my tendency to over-watch my favourite films.

“It was worth a shot.” I laughed, knowing I would rope him into watching it anyway.

“What do I buy a super spy, with a metal arm for Christmas?” I held up a butcher’s knife in front of Steve’s face. He rolled his eyes and took the knife from me. It was my third Christmas with Steve and every year I pretended not to know what to get his best friend, but deep down I knew exactly what I was buying for him.

“(Y/N),” he rolled his eyes—he looked staunch, but I knew deep down he found it funny.

“What?” I raised an eyebrow, “for all I know his secret passion is carvery.”

“He is definitely NOT into carving meats.” Steve laughed—there it was, he definitely found it funny.

“I don’t know Steven, I’ve seen him carve plenty of meat in my time.” It was a joke, but it was 500% true.

“You know he’s sensitive about that stuff.” Steve was right, Bucky did feel bad—but Bucky also tried to gouge flesh out of my arm during the civil war.

“Fine,” I picked up a cinnamon scented candle, “he’s getting a candle.” I knew that once we’d breezed through most of the list I’d go to the journal aisle to pick up a new one for him. It was our unspoken tradition and I knew he filled them up—the guy had a lot of thoughts. After that was done, I’d get a leather bound one with blank pages for Steve, so he could sketch and on my solo run I’d pick up a whole bunch of new art supplies for him—as well as my favourite cologne of his.

“One day,” Steve muttered to himself, as I pondered my mental list. “One day you’ll get along.” He was under the pretence that because he and I ended up making amends after whatever had happened, that Bucky and I could too. It was wishful thinking, however I really wasn’t sure that the love, hate relationship between Bucky and I would ever end—the banter was just too much fun.

“Hey, we need to stop by at the kitchen goods aisle.” I quickly changed the subject. “I have to buy Tony an espresso machine cause I broke his.”

“You don’t drink coffee?” Steve frowned.

“I know,” I nodded, “I threw it at someone.” It’d been a lovely time—I didn’t take random invasions of my tower lightly.

“Wow,” he shook his head. “How are we so opposite?” Steve would never throw a coffee machine at someone.

“I don’t know but you know what they s—oh my god.” I paused as we walked past the menswear isle. “Steve.” I shook his arm so he’d turn to look at what I was seeing.

“What?” He raised an eyebrow in question.

“I must buy you that sweater.” My mouth was a literal ‘O’ as I stared down the Christmas sweater in front of me.

“What sweater, where? Oh—“ He finally noticed the one I’d been eyeing. “No way, no thank you.”

“Excuse me,” I rushed towards it— there was no way I wasn’t buying him that damn ugly sweater. It was green—the ugly Christmas green, with white stitching and right in the centre was a reindeer with a 3D nose. “But you have no say in this matter.” He was going to look absolutely hilarious in it and there was nothing I loved more than my boyfriend looking funny.

“I don’t know why I try,” he spoke to himself as I rummaged through the rack for an extra, extra large. “Aha!” I cheered as I pulled one from the back, “try it on.”

His face was blank, but he took the sweater from me regardless. As he pulled it over his head my heart began to feel so full—he really loved me. Anyone who was willing to wear a sweater that ugly for someone else had to be full of love.

“What’s wrong?” he asked when he finally got it on—probably because he’d noticed how I was staring at him with wide and loving eyes.

“I love you,” I couldn’t stop staring at him, “I really bloody love you.”

“Does the sweater make me look that good?” A small smirk played on his lips—I could’ve jumped on him right then. Even with the most hideous item of clothing on, he looked an absolute 11 out of 10.

“Shut up.” I tried to mask how loving I was feeling with humor, but I wasn’t sure I could get the stupid smile off my face.

He pulled the sweater off and placed it in the trolley. “Let’s go buy the coffee machine.” He slung his arm around my shoulder and I honestly felt at home.

“Okay,” we loaded the last of our things into the back of the car. “There’s just one more thing I need to pick up.” He slammed the boot closed. “You stay here, I’ll be two seconds.”

“What?” I frowned, “why didn’t you just get it whilst we were in there?”

“Because. ” He paused for a second, “I don’t know actually, I think I just forgot.” He scratched his head in confusion, clearly wondering what to say next.

It was a poor excuse, but I decided I’d let it slip. “Alright,” I waved my hand, “go on.”

“Be back in 5!” he shouted back at me as he jogged back in.

“I knew I’d get you to watch this with me.” I grinned as I nestled myself into Steve’s side—I always won when it came to movies.

“I only do it because I love you.” He yawned before wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

“Oh look at you,” I poked his cheek, “trying the old yawn trick on me—It’s okay Captain, I already like you.”

A sly smirk spread across his face, “do you want a hot chocolate?”

“I would love one, but I really, really don’t want you to get up right now.” I slung my arm over his stomach and nestled further against him—allowing for the ugly sweater I’d picked to scratch against my skin.

“Hey,” he looked down at me and just stared for a second. “Will you marry me?”

“What?” My mouth suddenly ran dry—surely he was not asking me that.

He slowly pushed me aside, getting up off the couch and onto the floor—of course he was getting down on one knee.

My heart was beating at a pace I didn’t think was even possible, my palms felt like they were sweating litres.

He fished for something in his back pocket and within seconds pulled out a ring. “The box felt uncomfortable in my pocket—“ he laughed lightly. “But seriously (Y/N), I’d been waiting for the right time and when you looked at me today and told me you loved me, I knew it had to be today. So will you?”

“What a stupid question!” I cried out, “of course I bloody will.” I bounced off the couch and basically pummelled him as I fell on top of him—peppering him with a barrage of kisses.

“I love you.” He placed a chaste kiss to my lips.

“Yeah?” I grinned down at him, my hair falling all over his face.

“Yes.” He nodded.

“Well I think it’s quite obvious how I feel.” I sat up, my thighs straddling him as I combed my hands through his hair and admired the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with. “I’ll even allow you to make Bucky your best man.”

He laughed, the sides of his eyes crinkling as his face lit up. “Promise me you’ll try harder with him?”

I frowned, but nodded. “Only because I’ll have to see his ugly mug for the rest of my life, not because I love you or anything.”

“No,” Steve shook his head, his stupidly beautiful smile still plastered on his face. “Definitely not because you love me.”

#Steve Rogers #Steve Rogers x Reader #Captain America #captain america x reader #captain america oneshot #captain america fanfiction #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers oneshot #Bucky Barnes

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unstoppableforcce · 4 years

Text

what do we do now that it’s over ( 4 )

alt title: soft. like so soft

stormpilot/ Finnpoe !

for my recent Mandalorian content, here’s a brief interlude and possible last part to this fic, I can maybe promise an epilogue, we’ll see. anyways, here are my boys !

previous part | my Ao3

It stormed that night.

It had already started drizzling by the time Rey made it back, just in time for a silent dinner full of one-word responses to Kes as he inquired about their day trip. Rey managed out slightly longer answers, she seemed better than she was when they left her, but for the most part, she stayed just as quiet as they did.

By the time the lightning and whipping winds came with the storm, they were all settled in by the fire in the living room. Or at least, Kes, Rey, and Finn were, mindlessly playing cards while Poe did the best he could to turn the house and field down for the storm.

Kes offered to do it himself, but Poe volunteered before the suggestion even made it out of his lips. It was pouring, they could hear the rain as it pelted the windows and the wind as it shook the moderately unsuited house. Kes explained this was a particularly intense storm, that they didn’t get many of them.

Throwing down another card to end his hand in the game, Finn got to his feet and began to search out the windows for any sign of Poe. The eagerness at which he jumped for a role to separate himself from the group, it felt like he had felt since the second they got there, not like the realized Poe who sat by the stream and admitted he was suffering.

And now he was out fighting a storm or was trying to. Finn didn’t imagine he had been very successful.

Another burst of water hit against the side of the house with a splatter, but Finn only moved closer to the window, scanning the immediate radius of the front porch covered by the lights, but Poe was nowhere to be found. He wasn’t worried. Or maybe he was. He knew Poe could handle whatever it was, he just didn’t like the idea of it.

“Alright, I’m thinking of turning in for the night.” Kes stood onto his shaking legs with some help from Rey, grabbed one of the blankets from the couch and began back towards the bedroom by the kitchen. “That kid.” He cursed under his breath as he came up behind Finn, staring out into the darkness just as he was.

Finn watched him shake his head, waiting for something else, but there was nothing else. Kes just turned off towards his bedroom and carefully shut the door behind him.

“I think I’m going to head to bed too,” Rey smiled, still wrapped in her blanket. “You going to wait up?”

He nodded with a bite of his lip.

“He’s just trying to manage.” She filled in, walking up beside him and grabbing for his hand. “I imagine it’s pretty quiet for him now, without the fighting, he’s adjusting.”

Finn nodded along, giving her hand another squeeze. “I wish he’d ask for help.”

“I don’t know if he ever has needed to.” She shrugged, “He’s figured it all out on his own up until now.”

Her voice had a level of serenity to it that he didn’t know how to describe, but he felt the warmth she radiated spreading up his arm from where she held his hand. He almost wished he had stayed at the Force Tree, clearly she had picked something up from it that he had missed. But then again, he would never have let Poe walk back alone to stew by himself. They may have come back in silence, but there was a different silence to being alone with someone else.

“He’ll come around.” She gave a final squeeze to his hand and pulled away, heading up the stairs, blanket trailing behind her the whole way.

Whatever she had, he wanted some of it, that was for sure. He just didn’t know how to get it.

The only idea he had revolved around Poe, as many of his ideas did, even his bad ones. He walked back to the kitchen table and threw his jacket over his shoulders, tightening it up around his chest and heading back to the door.

The last few times he had tried this, Poe had turned him away and ignored his hand for help. Finn wasn’t going down without a fight this time. He wouldn’t leave him out there alone.

He took one deep breath in and stormed out into the blustering rain and wind. He scoffed out as soon as it hit his skin, the jacket made virtually no difference when it came down this hard. But he weathered it, he pulled the jacket tighter around him and stalked out through the mud, each step getting heavier and heavier as it weighed his boots down.

The beasts had retreated inside their small enclosures for protection from the storm, and even as the light from the porch radiated less and less the farther he got, there was always a strike of bright lightening to keep enough illuminated for him to keep moving forward.

Yet Poe was nowhere to be seen.

He kept down the path through the field, searching the best he could as the rain blurred his vision. The next crack of lightning seemed to come down even closer, and he jumped at the sound of it, but it was the light he needed to spot Poe at the end of the path. Back where they had turned onto the property, back near the road.

He was barely visible, bent over on the ground by the rock marking the start of the property which his surnames, but Finn knew it had to be him. As fast as his legs could carry him, he jogged out, trudging through large puddles when he had to, dragging all the mud in the world with him.

It didn’t matter, once he got closer and saw Poe wasn’t doing much moving, just sat next to the rock, he moved as fast as he could.

“Poe!” He shouted as he cut through the corner of the field. His voice was mauled by the storm, he didn’t know why he bothered. The lightning struck down with thunder five times the volume of the previous strikes. He tried again but it was useless. He just had to get there.

He knelt by his side, pushing the poncho from his face and for a brief second, he didn’t even seem conscious. Not until he gave his shoulders a shake and woke him up from whatever trance he had been in.

“Poe!” He shouted again, right in his face so he couldn’t be drowned out by the raging storm.

The water droplets danced along his lashes as he blinked, just shaded enough by the poncho to keep the rain from drenching his face, but his curls were wet, clinging to his skin.

“What are you doing out here!” Poe shouted back as soon as he realized where he was, and that Finn was out there with him. “You shouldn’t be out here.”

“What are you doing out here?” Finn fought, trying to look him over but Poe pushed his hands away gently.

“I was checking the flooding.”

Given that the small gouge in the dirt between them in the field had been a literal river Finn needed to jump over, he could pretty confidently say that the flooding was bad. But that didn’t explain why he had just been sat there, unmoving, as the storm fell over him.

“I was.” Poe defended before Finn even got the chance to argue. He reached up, dragging mud across his face as he rubbed his brow and pushed his sopping curls back from his eyes.

Finn couldn’t help but laugh, his hair was getting too long. So was his beard, though he imagined at the moment, the overgrown stubble was keeping him somewhat warmer than Finn’s recently shaved face was keeping him.

“We should head back inside.” Finn offered his hand.

Poe stared at it, his hand raised slightly as if he was going to grab it but it fell back down as his gaze did the same.

“Poe!” Finn shouted again over the storm but got no response.

When he crouched back down, he could see the tears. The rain couldn’t hide them, they were distinctly pooling in his eyes and streaming from the side. There was a sob caught in his body, he clenched his lips, refusing to let it out. Finn dropped both of his hands out to his knees and just held them there gently, not knowing what else he could do.

“I’m sorry.” The words broke free with the sob into his lap, his whole body shuddered with it, he couldn’t even manage to look back at Finn. “I’m- I’m so sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?” Finn pressed, holding tight to his knees and not moving away as Poe’s weak hands tried to shoo him off. He dipped his head, trying to search his face but Poe just pulled away.

He pulled his head all the way away and ripped the poncho hood the rest of the way off, reaching to tug on his nose and sniffle at the same time.

Finn only wanted to move closer.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” Finn fought but Poe fought harder, standing up and getting himself completely out of his grip.

“I can’t be what you want me to be!” He finally broke, rubbing his palms over his eyes and turning away, only stumble into a puddle. He tripped into it, falling into it with a splash just as another crack of lightning hit.

He tried to get himself up on his own, but Finn was by his side in a matter of seconds, not afraid to kneel in the water and pull him up. Poe tried to fight it, but he kept his grip until Poe was back onto his feet.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Finn shouted back, grabbing him by the shoulders and refusing to let him turn away, to wiggle from his grasp. “Who do you think I want you to be?”

Poe scoffed, the water on his lips shooting out towards Finn as he held him close. He tried to look away, but Finn fought to stay a constant in his line of sight. He wanted to understand. He wanted to help.

“I don’t have any of it figured out!” Poe shouted back, hitting his hands away firmly then wiping over his face futilely like he could stop the downpour from drenching him by the second, it was like trying to fight upstream of a river. “None of it. Any of it.”

“What does that matter to me!”

“I’m not that dashing resistance pilot anymore. I’m not a general. I’m not anything.” Poe cursed out, stamping into the ground with nowhere else to direct his anger.

Finn froze as he heard him, he let him pull away and fume, he just listened.

“I can barely manage around here, and my dad needed me here and I wasn’t here. The fields are flooded and the Belkan is wet and freezing- And I- I – The fence fell down and I can’t- I just-” Poe flooded out, constantly pulling back on his hair.

“Poe-”

“I can’t do any of it. I’m not a pilot anymore. I’m not resistance, I’m not a farmer. I’m nothing.”

“That’s not true-”

He scoffed, finally turning back to him and shaking his head. “Don’t lie to me-”

“I wouldn’t ever do that.” Finn fought, equally as angry now as he shouted back his way. “Not to you.”

Poe couldn’t manage out a response, he just stuttered into the rain as Finn stepped up, a crack of lightening sounding off behind him.

“I don’t care what title you go by. I don’t care if you’re resistance or republic, if you’re a general or a farmer or none of the above, none of that matters.” Finn screamed now to be heard over the downpour. “None of that is you.”

“I’m not-”

“You don’t have to be anything but yourself.” Finn sighed, stepping one final step to grab him again. “You think I’m not terrified that it’s over? That I’m not anything? You think I haven’t considered the fact that I have nothing.”

Poe couldn’t speak, he couldn’t move, he let Finn keep him steady and shout at him, he was desperate for every word, blinking through the rain to ensure he never lost sight of him.

“I don’t have a family home. I don’t have a name, a people, nothing! All I have are you and Rey. And if you don’t think that terrifies me, then you’ve got no idea. Because I’m just as scared as you are.”

The two of them stood just taking heavy breaths and holding a stare as the rain began to fall silent around them. They couldn’t tell whether or not it was actually dying down or neither of them cared enough to notice it anymore. Their focus remained solely on each other.

“You have to let me in. I need you to not just run off on me. I need you and you can’t just shut me out. Because I have nothing besides you.” Finn held tight on his shoulders, squeezing with each word. “You need to be you because I need you.”

In realizing just how loud he had gotten, how tight he held him, how close he had pulled him, Finn stepped back, releasing his grip and wiping the water off his face. The rain really was dying down, just a light sprinkle falling around them now.

But Poe remained frozen, in shock, in amazement, in a hundred emotions all culminating in his chest at once. He didn’t know what to do.

His heart did though.

He recovered the step Finn had taken away and grabbed him by the front of the jacket he had given him, pulling him back in close and bringing his head up to his, pressing his lips against his without a second more of hesitation. He was done waiting, and with everything that had just been said, he wasn’t afraid of it anymore.

Finn reacted just as easily, grabbing for his face and keeping him held in tight as he kissed back. It wasn’t soft, it was furious, everything the two had just shouted at each other playing out on their lips as they kissed, too desperate for the warmth to pull away.

Their faces drenched, they didn’t know if they had stood there for minutes or hours before Poe eventually pulled back to catch his breath.

“I’ve never needed anyone, I- If I-” Poe muttered against his lips, refusing to open his eyes, afraid that if he did it would all melt away. “Everyone I’ve ever needed, my mom… Leia… Snap…”

“I’m not going anywhere. Poe.” He spoke slowly, dipping his head in for one soft final kiss. “Except maybe inside because it’s cold and-”

Poe didn’t let him get that far, he pulled him right back in.

Maybe he did need help, maybe he did need someone to share the load. Maybe he needed him.

He was starting to realize, as he pressed his lips against Finn’s, that maybe he was okay with that.

#stormpilot #finnpoe #finn x poe #poe dameron #poe dameron imagine #A Long Trip Home

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