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tar-maitime · 16 days

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like my mirror years ago pt. 3

Rating: T Characters: Maedhros | Maitimo, Fingon | Findekano, Finwe, Feanor Additional: Years of the Trees, time travel, AU, fix-it WC: 1k

Read the previous installment here Apologies for the delayed update; life hit like a semitruck there for a bit.

“Maitimë? Who is this?”

Maedhros freezes in her tracks, causing Findekano to nearly stumble into her back. The plan had been for Maitimë to get them into her father’s house in Tirion, so they could explain the situation to Fëanaro and discuss their ideas for exposing Melkor. Good ideas, all of them - Maedhros would believe in them if her memories didn’t firmly contradict any of them coming true.

The plan had not involved running across...

“Haru Finwë!” Maitimë says, a little too brightly. “This is...a friend I have recently become acquainted with, and I had something here that I wished to show her. I did not know you were visiting today.”

Maedhros has a sneaking suspicion that she should bow, or do something similar. It’s been so long since she was at the court in Tirion, and even then, the rules for her and her siblings and cousins were of course different from those for strangers. She can’t remember any of the formalities properly now. All she can think of is the awful silence before the messengers finally said what she’d already begun to guess, that her grandfather was dead - the awful blankness in her father before rage had taken over - the way that her aunt Findis had put herself between Indis and anyone from Fëanaro’s family, all through the hastily arranged funeral - the broken grief-sounds that Indis had tried and failed to suppress...

Her grandfather’s death had shaped every moment of her life thereafter, and yet Maedhros had never really gotten the chance to mourn him, every moment being consumed with something that needed to be done, people who needed to be held together or managed.

And now he’s alive, right in front of her, and doesn’t know her.

Her cloak and hood, she’s fairly sure, are covering the armor and her shorn hair, but the manifold scars on her face are still plainly visible, and she can feel Finwë’s concern as his gaze tracks over her, trying to figure out what happened to her, what’s wrong with her.

She wants to wrap herself up in one of his hugs and cry, but that would be startling and abnormal even if he recognized her, let alone with her being presented as a stranger.

“My king,” she murmurs, with a dip of her head, acutely aware of the roughness of her ruined voice.

Anyone who had lived in Beleriand for any length of time would have noted the things about her that don’t belong, would have disregarded politeness in favor of a healthy suspicion and investigated. Perhaps once, before the Great Journey, Finwë would have done the same. But the Finwë who is king in Valinor sees only his beloved granddaughter’s odd but harmless friend - everything here is harmless - so he merely nods and smiles benevolently and goes his way. “I shan’t keep you.”

She will keep him, though, if she can, Maedhros thinks with a sudden ache. She will keep him and her father and her cousins and brothers and Findekano, everyone she loves - keep them alive, keep them from becoming what she has had to become. She no longer cares if it is impossible. They have to try anyway.

“Come on,” she says, once Finwë has gone. “We need to find Atar.”

* * *

“Nelyafinwë! What has happened to you?”

That’s all it takes for Maedhros to feel her knees go out from under her, because. Fëanaro was looking at her when he said it. He looked at her and called her Nelyafinwë; he knows who she is.

“Atar,” she says, and that’s all she manages before she has to sit down on a mercifully uncluttered stool and Fëanaro abandons what he was tinkering with and crosses to her in three quick strides.

The actual Maitimë is beside her in another moment. “Atar, how did you know?” she asks quietly. “Even I couldn’t guess; I had to be told.”

Fëanaro looks downright offended. “She is my child. Obviously I would know who she is. Now,” he turns back to Maedhros, “Nelyafinwë - other-Nelyafinwë, I suppose - can you tell me what happened that did all this to you?”

He reaches to hold her hands, seeming disturbed when he only encounters one, but she grips his hand tightly in the one she has. Another person she’s lost, here in front of her again, alive and real.

“You’re not going to ask how I got here?” she says.

Fëanaro half-shrugs. “That is less urgent, probably, and I already have a theory or two. Travel back in time or from an alternate Singing seem the most likely. Right now I want to know what I need to do about whatever hurt you.”

She’d almost forgotten about when he was like this, when he genuinely cared for them and wasn’t lost to the grip of mania and paranoia. He’s so close already, at this point in the timeline, to falling into that, but perhaps that will change, too, if they can stop Morgoth.

“It was Melkor, Atar,” she says quietly. “A lot of things, but mostly Melkor. We have an idea of how to keep it from happening, and that’s why we came to see you. We’re going to need your help...and you’re probably not going to like the kind of help we need.”

#silmarillion #maedhros #fingon #finwe #feanor #good parent feanor #russingon #maedhros x fingon #for anyone curious feanor has not yet noticed maedhros' married-eyes #in fairness he's a little distracted by all the Everything #au of roots #eden timeline

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amethysttribble · 20 days

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I am not immune to a good ‘Feanor Needs Therapy’ joke myself, but when I stop to think about it, I’m compelled to believe that, actually, Feanor was in therapy from the moment he could talk and it made him worse

#the elves canonically have (something like) therapy #it’s called the Gardens of Lorien asjdkfkd Este and Irmo are right there #and let’s be honest everyone was talking over Feanor’s head all the time about how ‘that poor boy must be so messed up’#‘he should go to the Gardens’#and his mother’s corpse is there but no one much thinks about that #they just want to Fix Him #he probably was taken to elf therapy continuously throughout his childhood #you know those kids whose parents are therapists or their parents are a little /too into/ therapy as a concept or cure all #that’s Feanor #and because he was thinking about All That constantly and analyzing it and let’s be real being stared at with massive curiosity all the tim #it made him Worse #(disclaimer that Therpay is Good but by god some people talk about it like a magic pill you can take and… it’s not lol)#feanor #tolkien #the silmarillion #Tribble post

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superloves4 · 10 months

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While I slog through a fic I actually really want to tell (the joys of writing!) I decided to talk about that Feanor as Melkor's son AU I mentioned in my tags

So far I have three possibilities, from least realized to most:

Feanor as Melkor and Mairon bio baby, so far I don't really have much for this one, the Valar find baby Feanor after Melkor's imprisonment (haven't decided why Mairon wouldn't have escaped with the baby) and give him to Finwe to raise (I hadn't realized it doesn't makes sense for Miriel to die in this one until now, so either she doesn't and it's full throwing away canon or in this one she doesn't exist and Finwe just didn't want to tell Feanor who his real parents were, it's both sad and funny)

Baby Feanor kidnap adopted by Melkor, the timeline is bothering me here, maybe Feanor is born before Melkor's imprisonment? Or he leaves imprisonment way before the original? I mostly wanted this to be funny about Melkor and Mairon getting so attached and wanting so bad to be good parents to feral child Feanor that they actually get redeemed (although dark!Feanor x Nerdanel is very intriguing)

And the one I (unfortunately) have the most on (as of right now) is Feanor as Melkor... and Miriel's son, I jokingly thought about this one but alas it got bigger than I expected, so: Melkor decides to go mess with the elves only to find Miriel collecting bugs (they're silk worms, weird bug girl Miriel for the win!) and he gets actually quite impressed with her desire to not settle with the world and wanting to make it prettier with fabrics, they fall in love (or as much in love Melkor can be, so far he is more like canon evil Melkor than the softer one of the other two ideas) but when she finds out who he is, she runs away and falls for Finwe instead.

Finwe is then totally cool with raising Miriel's child because he loves her so much but Miriel keeps feeling she's awful for her previous love for Melkor, combined with the power required to sustain a half-ainur child, and ends up dying.

Finwe of course, absolutely adores little Feanor despite not being his bio dad, and thus names him Finwion (later Curufinwe), but raising a half-ainur child is not easy, especially when you can't actually ask anyone for help without revealing the truth, so Finwe just has to deal with eldritch child Feanor, alone.

(like, one time there's a teacher Feanor hates because he heard the teacher say that Feanor killed Miriel, so Feanor gives the teacher a bracelet he doesn't even understand how he made cursed, the teacher then complains to Finwe, who is just trying to understand how to explain to his son that he can't do that, also he fires the teacher)

Then it's basically the same as canon up until Melkor return, because instead of trying to create discord he arrives and realizes Feanor's his son and tries to pull a Darth Vader and convince Feanor to join him.

Feanor is, of course, against the idea but Melkor is convinced that if he reveals Feanor's true parentage in the upcoming festival then the uproar and hate will cause Feanor to be more willing.

Only, right before he can make his announcement Feanor shows up wearing the silmarils (Melkor decides to rename him Lightbringer but I haven't figured out what that is in Quenya) and instead of going along with Melkor, Feanor

Bows. to. MANWE!!!!!

And does a whole speech about Melkor trying to deceive him by claiming he isn't Finwe's son (Feanor already realized the truth, he's just rejecting it) and doing a whole spectacle of proof

The Finwe family isn't stupid and to Feanor's surprise, the first person to join his show is INDIS!!! Joined then (in order) by Nolo, Nerdanel, and Maglor (if it was political it would be Maedhros but it's a performance remember)

Manwe isn't stupid and understands what they are doing so when Melkor tries to say that it's all Finwe's lie he just tells Melkor that it was clear that Feanor was Finwe's son

Melkor storms out (he still plans to destroy the trees but his objective is Feanor instead of just the silmarils) and the Finweans leave too

Feanor has a cathartic talk and cry with his dad while the rest of the family discuss what this means for them all, Feanor is now more open to his half-family and his relation to the other Valas is totally different, and how that could end up having happier ending to the story.

And that's how much I have of this one, it compels me but it's the only one that I have no idea of how to add Melkor x Mairon and the original idea was about THEM as parents whereas this one is about the original Finweans in a different situation so I'm conflicted

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lordgrimwing · 8 months

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Illness #02

Finwë does not beat his son.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Fëanor babbled, stumbling after his father, his wrists pinched tightly in Finwë’s grip.

They drew near the barn.

“Please,” He begged now, tears streaming down his face. “I didn’t mean to.”

Without a word, Finwë pulled him through the open doors. His stride didn’t slow when the boy’s shoulder hit the heavy wood of the door, and he cried out again.

Fingolfin looked up from where he was cleaning one of the stalls, the horses all turned out to pasture. Finwë’s second son held his pitchfork in a white-knuckled grip and quickly turned back to his chore, ducking into the back of the stall so he wouldn’t be seen, but he couldn’t escape from the older boy’s cries.

Fëanor’s entire body shook as his back was forced against one of the support pillars in the middle of the isle holding up the hay loft. He bit his tongue and tasted blood.

“I won’t say those things again,” He promised weakly as his father pulled his arms around the worn wood of the pillar and tied his wrists together with a leather cord.

Still without a word, Finwë forced him down to his knees, pressing on his shoulders until, with a sob, he crumpled like a dry leaf.

“Please don’t leave me here.”

He glowered down at the weeping boy and spoke for the first time since grabbing and dragging him out of the house. “You’ll stay here and think until you’re ready to be a part of this family and apologize to your mother.��

Fëanor’s face tightened at that, and he bared his teeth and screamed, “She’s not my mom! You killed my mom!”

Finwë’s fingers flexed, but he didn’t lash out. Instead, he crouched in front of his son and said, with all the calmness he could muster, “Míriel took her own life,” pain flashed across his face. He forced it down. “Indis raised you and cared for you as her own. She’s suffered your poor behavior for years and is undeserving of your scorn. I’ve let this go on long enough because she loves you like any of your siblings, but you will not speak to her like that again. If you insist on acting like a wild animal and lashing out at kindness, then you can stay here like an animal.”

He stood, looming over the cowering boy. They stayed like that for a moment, and then he turned and stormed away.

Fingolfin stayed in the stall for a minute more as Fëanor’s tears faded into silence. Then he crept out into the aisle behind his brother and fled through the doors on the far side, trying to shake the tightness clinging to his skin and making his throat hurt.

#cw: psychological/emotional abuse of child #feanor and fingolfin don't have a great time in this one #the silmarillion #feanor #finwe #fingolfin #finwe is not as good a parent as he thinks #old gods au #grimwing writes

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adoseoftrees · 1 year

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Findis as an extremely inconsiderate emo child: I will make my father regret his wish of having more children

The most difficult baby elf Valinor had ever suffered

Being depressed about her family issues and decided to make her problem everyone’s (well, to be specific, Finwe’s) problem

Pranked Feanor (can be bribed to stop)

Pranked Finwe (cannot be bribed to stop)

Sold Noldor royal family drama to Vanyar cousins for fresh yogurt and free goat rides (half of the things she told others were convincing made-up stories)

Smuggled wild animals and livestocks into family house (ended up keeping a donkey she really loved and a few chickens to make omelette for her mom)

Disappear for days then reappeared like nothing happened (she knew all the hiding spots in Tirion and learned a few handy Songs)

Refused to react to her name and made a new name for herself every couple days

Ignored Finwe like he did not exist (purposely walked into him and went “oops mom I think I hit a piece of slightly solidified air)

Ran away to Taniquetil and camped there

Ran away to Alqualondë and camped there

Ran away to Lorien and camped there

Took many naps in Lorien attempting to leave her body behind (and failed)

She did think it would be nice. If she could leave her body behind she would not go to Mandos. She would fly up high into the sky, disappear into the snow-covered mountains and never return.

It is just funny, to grow up knowing you are THE reason that your father remarried and doomed his previous wife into eternal death

(That was her way of interpreting the matter. Finwe wanted a child. She was the child Finwe remarried to get. Nobody asked her of her opinions.)

She thought it was extremely messed up that Finwe married Indis for more children instead of like, love. And was willing to condemn his previous wife to a fate like that, just for his selfish wish to have more offsprings. Like, her father would not marry her mother if her mother did not have a working womb. What did that imply about their relationship?

She was a girl. People told her she would grow up to be beautiful like her mother, get married, have many children, and be happy till the world was remade.

She did not believe them.

#tolkien #silm #the silmarillion #silmarillion #silm headcanon #silmarillion headcanon #findis #my dumb made up ooc headcanon #seriously I don’t think Finwe was good at raising children #actually he was so bad at it #but Indis loved him and he loved Indis and they thought they could make it work #Feanor and Findis got to suffer the consequences #Findis might grow up believing she must defend her mother because Finwe always hesitated choosing between his wife and his son #that surely would mess a child up #i see a lot of fic that findis was the responsible one to fix others’ problems #I think she was the problem #just like feanor #but she was a good older sister because she tasked herself to play the role of a responsible parent figure to replace Finwe #and a good aunt #she just had a lot of opinions about her father #and tried very hard to manipulate a divorce

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thesummerestsolstice · 3 months

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So I think one thing that really drives Feanor is his grief– he looses Miriel, and he very clearly never recovers from that. There's the pain of loosing a parent and the added layer of Miriel's death being, on some level, a choice to leave Feanor. You can't tell me he didn't internalize the idea that he wasn't good enough for his mother to stay ay least a little. And I can't help but imagine that most of Valinor really wasn't helpful. There was probably a lot of vague sympathy with no real understanding of the situation, people who in theory thought Feanor had the right to grieve but reacted pretty badly to any actual displays of grief, and some people who insisted that Miriel chose to stay dead, Finwe and Indis were happily married, and therefore, Feanor shouldn't feel sad about it anymore. Even for those with more understanding of grief, it's still a really complicated situation. But you know who would understand Feanor?

Elrond. And the reason is Elros and Arwen– Elrond knows what it's like when someone you love dearly chooses to leave you, essentially forever, not because they don't care about you or because you weren't good enough, but because they have to make the best choice for themselves. And how you can respect that choice, and be glad that they did what they needed to, but still grieve them and the relationship you had with them. He understands those complicated feelings and how to process them in a healthy and non-destructive way.

And I'm losing my mind over this because Feanor is the one who starts the kinslayings and the cycle of violence between elves, and Elrond is the end result of all that violence; born to two refugees and raised largely by Feanor's sons. But despite all that, he's good and kind and able to focus on healing instead of pain. He ends the violence and makes a sanctuary where everyone is welcome. And he's able to do what Feanor never could, and not be consumed by his pain. And that means so much.

#silmarillion #silm meta #silm headcanons #elrond #elrond peredhel #feanor #elros #arwen undomiel #miriel #screaming crying etc #Had this realization and it destroyed me just a little #I will never not lose my mind over Elrond and all the ways he's amazing #tw grief #tw death

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doodle-pops · 2 months

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Better Than The Stars

Caranthir x reader

Request: Hi Mina! Can I request a one shot where Maedhros or Caranthir are married after being reincarnated and they're struggling with people opinions about their children (hair color, their patrents past, Fëanor...) meanwhile their wives don't care even more because they're noble and know about their society (plus Nerdandel Is supporting). However lots of fluff and family actitude 🩷 thank you!!!! - @foreverandadaydarling

A/N: A pleasure to create this piece on your behalf dear. Enjoy!

Warnings: female reader, angst, comfort/happiness, reborn!Caranthir, arguments, Caranthir wanting to separate

Words: 2k

Synopsis: There were days when even the great son of Feanor required reassurance that your choice to be a family was genuine and not out of guilt.

Pulling the blanket over your shoulders, you stood in the doorway, watching your husband tediously slave away, attempting to garden. A chore that once came easily during his youthful and glorious years of peace was now foreign and laborious. You would have been fine with assisting him, but quick he was to assure you that you shouldn’t be the only one labouring around the household. Your response? A simple smile and a pat on his shoulders before leaving him to his own devices.

It was now spring, and Arien’s rays were barely peeking through the clouds to relieve the winter coldness. What little crop you two managed to save during the previous seasons was now getting the opportunity to grow. Winter was harsh for you two since you no longer lived in the comfort of your parent’s homes or the lavish life you once did in Thargelion. Returning to Valinor, branded as outcasts or the darkened ones, most of your family turned blind eyes to many of the returned—as did the former servants of his house. Most were quick to beg for forgiveness and repent their rebellion towards the Valar and were easily forgiven; however, their compromise was to never serve under their house again.

You, along with a few of their spouses, openly chose to remain at their sides after their rebirth, believing that if they were given a second chance at life, then there was still good left in them. Unfortunately, your choice of dwelling with him left a stain on his heart when he realised the life you would have to live with him—giving up the lavish treatment you once had.

“Ease up on the hoe—the handle already has a crack, arimelda.” Halting his swing mid-air, he turned to gaze at you with soft eyes, but behind them, you saw the distant look of regret.

Yes, he regretted you being dragged along with him in a swirl of chaos and destruction. He promised you the world when you both wedded and instead, he brought death, pain, and heartbreak. Though you knew the true reason behind his actions, hence the force being placed on the handle with each swing the tool made with the earth.

His children.

Your two daughters became the newest victims of the backlash the House of Feanor faced. A brief excursion into Tirion’s market yesterday left them scurrying back home with tears streaming down their ruddy cheeks, a precious trademark that made them all the more magnificent in their father’s eyes. Keeping the incident a secret from him all day yesterday to maintain peace was broken this morning upon mindless eavesdropping as his girls hush-hushed the harsh words. His first instinct was to fly into Tirion and have his daughters pinpoint the individuals before giving them a good old-fashioned taste of his mind, the classic Moryo style.

Had it not been for his daughters' pleas alongside yours, the House of Feanor would have left another mark on their reputation.

Sharply exhaling and relaxing the flare of his nostrils, he gave a pained smile. “Ah, sorry, I didn’t notice. I’ll fix it when I’m finished.” And yet, his smile didn’t reach his eyes as it once did.

“No need, just go easy on it.”

Offering him a genuine smile, one that reached your eyes, he dropped the hoe.

He still couldn’t understand, to this day, how you could be happy amidst the life he had you living. You deserved the riches he bestowed upon you in Thargelion. Whatever you wished for, he would have been able to grant—be it the largest diamond, a platter of fruits, or the finest material for your clothes. Not this broken life of struggling to bring in a good harvest or being cursed at when you went into town for produce and meat. Even the relationships with a few of his brothers felt strained, the harsh, cold, blank stares you would give them whenever they visited.

You still hated them for persuading him to retrieve the Silmaril, even though you knew he had no choice. You just wished it had come at a later date so more time could have been spent. At least his mother did her best to reach out and act as a guidance counsellor when she could. Her words were harsh at times, despite the honesty behind them and bias towards her sons, giving recognition to her wisdom. But not once had she persuaded any of her daughters-in-law to leave her sons. That was the sole decision she left you ladies to make; your choices were your consequences.

Frowning, deep in thought, he parted his lips to argue. “Why—”

“Don’t, because I will give you the same answer as I always do. I just want to be with you. I’m happy with you,” you reminded with a single huff.

Returning a breathy laughter, wanting nothing more than to scream and yell at the now nonchalant and lackadaisical you were treating the crisis, he curled his fists into his trousers. “Really? Is that the life you genuinely want with me when we have children? If it were you and I, then I would be less inclined to leave, but we have a family who have now become victims! And for what?! Looking like me and coming from this accursed family! This is not the life I want for them and you!”

“Then you would prefer us packing up and departing after expressing your gratefulness upon your rebirth that we stayed?!” you snapped, lowering your tone to prevent your girls from picking up that their parents were arguing.

“Yes! Yes, I would have preferred that instead of having to listen to the vile comments targeted at my children and you!” He shook his head and turned to gaze at the dirt ground. Standing in the troughs he had dug, he felt insignificant for the first time in his life. He felt lost as if his purpose had been stolen from him.

Maybe if I covered myself with dirt and grew, I might be able to start over again? I’d be able to regain a purpose in life.

“Do you genuinely believe I would leave you so easily? Have I not walked through fire and gotten burned to prove my loyalty? Is that not what this family is all about? Do you honestly want to chase us away because of naysayers? I’ve said it time and time again, I don’t care about other’s opinions of us. What happened to the Morifinwë who didn’t care about other’s opinions?”

“He died long ago and has no intentions of returning now that he has children!” He allowed himself to stand there in the dirt and lifted his head to gaze at the overcast above. “You could return to your family, taking our daughters with you, and atone for your actions. You all would not have to struggle or be hated—everyone would adore you all, a life of luxuries and opportunities. You were never hated, always loved, so why do you still stay when the situation shows no sign of bettering?”

If the Arien was out, I’d be able to sprout properly. But even she would not wish to cast her rays upon a person like me—they were too beautiful to be wasted.

Tugging the blanket tighter around your body as a brisk cold wind blew through the garden, you shivered. Listening to the branches quake and shiver from the intensity of the violent wind, you could observe and ponder how long your actions had troubled his mind. He didn’t drop his head from the sky; he kept it facing upwards and left his hands curled into fists at his sides, controlling his temper. Opening his mouth to respond, he quickly snapped it shut, unable to provide an appropriate counter.

It was something he had done less and less since his rebirth. It was the most eerie change in his persona. Gone was the easily angered Caranthir, replaced by a mellowed and soft-spoken person. Still, he’d grind his teeth or grumble under his breath at the hate, but always bit his tongue because he knew it was the truth and there was no point in fighting it. Yet, there was anger behind your decision to remain at his side. You could have left him, never to be heard of again, and lived in a peaceful paradise.

“Because we would not have been at peace if you were not around. To hear our children ask for their father, why wasn’t he coming around or if he didn’t love them anymore are questions I would like to avoid. I want our girls to grow up knowing and seeing you in a different light compared to how others perceive you.” Your voice was soft and considerate, and his tensive posture was relaxed when it reached his ears. “I want them to know that their father was kind and loving, and someone who made an effort.”

Relaxing his fingers from their tight grip, he wiggled them around to alleviate the ache. Lowering his head to your level, he turned to confront you. His forest green eyes pierced into yours, seeking warmth and honesty behind your words. And you allowed him to—there was nothing to conceal. He deserved to witness the truth for himself.

“I want peace and I also want happiness Caranthir. Do you remember our vows, happiness and sows, for better or worse, through the good times and bad? I chose you from the start and I will continue to choose you until the end of time—we will stand with you until the end of time.” Walking out the doorway, you stepped barefoot onto the dirt. Grimacing because of the coldness of the earth seeping through your pores, you continued to walk until you stood before him.

Extending your hand, you tenderly grasped his freckled one and raised it until it met your lips. Returning a smile to him, of which he was unaware, you kissed the back of his hand before reaching your other hand to encircle his waist. Despite the stern and unyielding expression on his face, your actions were the exception that broke the ice, causing him to blush slightly. This was one occasion when he could not deny being captivated by your gesture.

Raising your head to meet his gaze, you captured the longing, desperate reassurance in his stare.

“Sometimes I wonder who is the more stubborn of the two of us.”

“I have never been happier Moryo; you make me the happiest person in the world.” Saying this, you took his hand encased by yours and rubbed it against your cheek before repeating the gesture upon his ruddy cheeks. “Your daughters love and want you in their lives; don’t push us away.”

“Even in this state of living when I can no longer provide the best?”

“You always give us your best.” At the whisper of your words, a warm wind blew through the gardens and wrapped its cool arms around you both, pushing you into one another. Within that moment, two extra pairs of footsteps were heard rushing out the backdoor. Lo and behold, the sight of two miniature versions of both of you came scampering out of the house to rush for a group hug. Never one for missing out on family hugs whenever they saw you both embracing.

The moment they ran out of the house giggling was the moment a flutter of warmth flowed into his heart as he gazed at his two loving children clinging to you both. Their short arms struggling to encircle your bodies as they squeezed your waists tightly added appreciation to the warmth. Arien’s rays took the most opportune moment to shine her light upon you both, encasing you in a swirl of golden light. A light finally shone upon you both, maybe a sign of acceptance or prosperity, or both.

Laughing at the action, Caranthir could not help but gaze lovingly at them, giving their heads small pats and then at you—finally, he was seeing the honesty and beauty behind your words in your eyes. Choosing him wasn’t out of sympathy or shame, it was all love and contentment.

“Then I will continue to give you all my best meldanya…for staying at my side.”

“You are all that I need.” Pulling him closer, you rubbed his nose against yours and gently pecked his lips before grinning at his blushing face.

“Can I have a kiss too atya?”

“Me too, I want a kiss please!”

With a smile emanating from the depths of his heart, Caranthir gazed at his girls tip-toeing with their lips puckered for their kisses and chuckled. Some things truly never change.

Top of Form

“Alright, line up for your kisses!”

Masterlist

Taglist: @lilmelily @ranhanabi777 @rain-on-my-umbrella @mysticmoomin @asianbutnotjapanese @sakurayaxd @batsyforyou @involuntaryspasms @ladyenchanted @hermaeuswhora @aconstructofamind @stormchaser819 @addaigio @lamemaster

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thecoolblackwaves · 4 months

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Family Of Nerds: Feanorian Modern AU

(I’m sorry this is somewhat Americanized I just don’t have enough knowledge about anywhere else to make those allusions) (Also please reblog with your own headcanons or other thoughts!)

Feanor

Philologist; studies language history

Often assists at various museums, colleges, archeological sites, etc

Has published several books and given many lectures

Creates his own languages like Tengwar for fun, also is a hobby blacksmith

Teaches his children many archaic languages no one else speaks and takes his family on "educational" vacations

Also attends every convention known to man, even ones that have seemingly nothing to do with his own interests, dressed to the nines and spends his time there signing books and debating other people

Loves his wife just as madly as the day he met her and is ecstatic he married his high school sweetheart

Idolizes his father. Would have done great following his political career if he hadn't "ruined" his public image by becoming a teen parent, ultimately feels he's made the right decisions for his life though and is happy with his work

Rivalry with Fingolfin over who can host the best dinner party (and you best believe he wears smart-ass punny aprons while cooking a six course meal for his guests)

Nerdanel

Professional sculptor and multimedia artist

Teaches classes at an arts college

Is known to eat the fruit out of the bowls her students are sketching when no one is looking

Cannot cook to save her life

Enthusiastically attends every possible event in her family’s calendar no matter the weather or lack of skill at a toddler dance recital

Dresses in a fabulously bohemian eccentric artist way; stole the show when she attended the Grammys with Makalaure and has been featured in several fashion magazines

Carries all sorts of art supplies and seemingly random tools in her purse at all times, including a chisel, googly eyes, edible glitter, a bajillion hair ties, DW40, and peanut M&Ms

Has a calm, wise disposition that belies her truly chaotic nature

Often looked to for advice from her students and children and will only pull your leg when she thinks you’re being stupid

Does give genuinely good advice though, mostly because she is uncanny in her ability to read people and observe subtle hints

Maitimo

Studied communications, currently working as his father’s apprentice but hopes to find a position as a public relations specialist

Uses his intimidating stature and loud, deep voice to his advantage as needed

Was born while his parents were teenagers and still living with their families, he remembers watching cartoons with Grandpa Finwe and being babysat by his uncles

Also attended his mother’s graduation from art school as a small child and clapped until his little hands hurt

Is painfully aware of how all his younger brothers look up to him - literally - and sometimes struggles with the pressures of setting a good example, though he does much better than he realizes

Drinks his coffee from a mug that reads “don’t make this ginger snap” (Nerdanel has a matching one)

The gayest gay to ever gay, informs everyone of this via cheesy tee shirts gifted from his brothers and cousins

Drives a minivan, claims he chose it because it was the only car that would fit his legs and not because he can haul his brothers around in it

Frequently complains about missing the technology of his childhood but resents being called a millennial

Makalaure

Grammy award winning artist and composer

Created the score for a recent movie that bloomed his popularity and brought him to the limelight

Has a Youtube channel with several music videos he definitely didn’t blackmail his family into filming with him

Also performed on Broadway once and will not let you forget it

Used to skip school to busk in the train station and once caught his math teacher also skipping school

Extremely popular with interviewers, camera crew, and other industry specialists for his kindness and crazy stories about his family

Donates large amounts of his royalties to children’s hospitals and other charities

Used to hog the bathroom in the mornings to put on makeup and style his hair

Practices Beyonce dance routines in the mirror, has convinced Curufin to do them with him before

Spent a semester studying in Sydney, Australia and fainted after encountering a large spider in his dorm room

Tyelkormo

Forest ranger at a National Park

Works at outdoor summer camps every year, all the children love him and his giant fluffy dog

Also volunteers at animal shelters and the wildlife rehabilitation center at the National Park

Creatine for breakfast, lunch, and dinner; drinks so much milk Nerdanel used to tell him it was why his hair was white

Wakes up at 5 in the morning to exercise (disgusting)

Got a long bow for Christmas one year (the note said Santa but he knows it was his mom) and practices in the backyard by shooting at Amrod’s pumpkins

Metalhead, particularly likes viking metal and Nordic black metal

Made Huan his own battle vest complete with dog-themed patches such as “Bad to the Bone” and “No Leashes No Masters”

Tells the most terrible jokes you’ve ever heard then laughs like a seagull vomiting up a stolen bag of Doritos

Extremely loyal to his family, sometimes to a fault

Carnistar

Professional business accountant

Also does taxes as a side hustle because “it’s so easy”

Is obsessed with Oreos but will not admit it because of his brother's teasing about "Moryo's Oreos"

Obligatory family goth and not ashamed of it

Started mending his hand-me-down clothes as a necessity and got into sewing, now makes fantastic garments for his family and friends to wear

Halloween is the only valid holiday, he spends the entire year making his costume (it’s usually a vampire or some fandom character)

Stays up until 3am gaming on a PC he and Feanor built together one summer, favorite game is currently Balder’s Gate

Had to take speech therapy as a child and later some anger management classes.... because he got too good at expressing himself

Curufin

Silversmith and jewelry maker

Specializes in accessories for ballet dancers and other performers

Ballet dancer since he was young, never succeeded with a professional career but still practices daily and chose his specialty to remain part of the scene

Holds a serious grudge against certain critics that failed his entry to ballet academy (will not sell his products to them or their schools)

Always looking for new business opportunities, not always in the most honest of ways

Struggles with self esteem issues

Has several cats and claims they betray him when they snuggle with Huan but secretly finds it adorable

Frequently collaborates with Caranthir to make elaborate costumes just for the fun of it

Made a tiara for his favorite cat, Princess Paws

Would sleep until four in the afternoon if you let him (or if Princess Paws didn’t wake him up screaming for food)

Amrod

Gardening Club President at his school

Started a trade and barter farmers market after school to reduce waste and share the bounty of his and fellow club member’s gardens

Frequently tries to convince his parents to turn their property into a “self sufficient homestead”, leaves pamphlets and pictures of adorable baby animals lying around the house

Enlisted the help of his twin and Maitimo to build a chicken coop, forgot to ask Feanor’s permission first

Demands payment in the form of fresh caught fish or deer jerky for the use of his gourds in Tyelko’s target practice

Has definitely switched places with Amros to escape trouble or science tests

Often neglects his homework for pursuits he feels are more important, will only do it without complaint when Carnistar tells him to

Had eyes for the cool-looking red glow on the stove as a child and was banned from the kitchen for most of his adolescence

Is generally a persistent and stubborn person (wonder where he got it from)

Amros

Amateur photographer with an instagram following nearing one million

Account consists of 95% nature photography and 5% “The Adventures of Huan and Princess Paws” as he follows them around the back yard

Takes all of Makalaure’s headshots and creates his album covers, also photographs Curufin’s jewelry to upload to his retail website

“Borrows” Carnistar’s prized PC to upload and edit his photos

Conspired with Amrod to convince their elementary school classmates they were secretly Fred and George Weasley disguised as Muggles, ultimately failed because someone thought their accents “just sounded like they were copying Peppa Pig”

Still pulls out his British accent on occasion when someone needs cheering up

Inherited Nerdanel’s keen observation skills, mostly uses them to blackmail his brothers into doing his chores

But also gives the most amazing presents because he knows exactly what everyone truly wants

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annoyinglandmagazine · 1 year

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‘Stop fidgeting Nelyafinwe, you’re not a child’ Feanor chided over the clatter of the forge as he hammered a plate of metal. Maitimo flushed and tried to still his anxious hands to little avail. Feanor sighed and put his hammer down, gesturing for his apprentices to leave them be. They scampered off and he resumed his work.

‘Nelyo if you don’t want to be here you can go somewhere else. You’re really not as terrible as you think you are but it’s alright if you’d prefer to focus on your diplomacy studies. I’m under no delusions that this is going to be your craft.’ He said this an exasperated tone of voice, having already made clear that he believed all his sons could excel in smithing if they applied themselves but not wanting to rehash the old argument. There was no reason for Nelyafinwe to disrupt his work if he was just going to stand there being awkward. No one had told him he had to be here.

Maitimo went quiet for a moment and then he spoke quietly ‘It’s not that Atya.’ Atya. It had been quiet some time since he’d been called that by Caranthir, let alone his eldest. ‘Is something wrong Maitimo?’ he tried to keep his tone light and didn’t raise his eyes from his workbench to avoid scaring his son off. Maitimo was behaving so oddly and he was growing concerned.

He spoke quickly as if afraid he’d lose the nerve ‘I- I’m not going to be able to give you any grandchildren.’ Feanor turned to him quickly to look at him trying to see if there was any visible ailment speaking frantically in worry for his child’s well-being ‘You’re not injured are you? Are you unwell? You should have told me immediately, I can take you to a healer-’ ‘No, no it’s nothing like that I’m perfectly healthy,’ Maitimo cut him off quickly still looking ill at ease. Feanor relaxed slightly at this, but remained wary, analysing his son carefully.

‘Well what do you mean then Nelyo?’ Maitimo took a deep breath steeling himself before he spoke, ‘I don’t like nís. Well, I like nís fine, I enjoy their company but I don’t like them the way I’m meant to. I couldn’t imagine liking one in a courting or marrying way and definitely not, well’ he was blushing furiously now at the implied topic of conversation and stuttering over his words, refusing to make eye contact. ‘I- I prefer nér. If it were an option I think I would marry an nér.’ He looked up slowly with a terrified look on his face as if expecting some form of anger or disgust.

‘Oh Maitimo,’ Feanor breathed stepping forward to wrap his arms around his son. Maitimo exhaled in relief, leaning down to rest his head on his father’s shoulder. ‘You’ve gotten far too tall. I used to be able to hold you in one hand.’ Feanor whispered into his ear. ‘I was so scared to disappoint you,’ Nelyo said, voice shaky, ‘I just wanted to be a good son and make you happy.’

‘Maitimo, my darling child. All you ever had to do to make me happy was come home at the end of the day. You are all the most incredible children I could have asked for and nothing about any of you could ever change that.’ Nelyo started sobbing then and Feanor held him, rocking him back and forth and stroking his hair. The next day he told Nerdanel that he was petitioning the Valar to make same sex marriage a thing.

#Silmarillion #tolkien #maedhros and Feanor #Feanor is a good parent #Maedhros #feanor #feanorians #coming out

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amethysttribble · 1 year

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I have a thought rolling around in my head about how fandom has a very rigid, very bland, very one-dimensional idea of what a ‘good’ parent looks like, and how this vision is entirely fantasy and wish-fulfillment

#like they come off as soooo ‘I wanted my parents to be supportive in everything I did and never get mad ever no matter what’#and like… that’s not a person doing right by their child that’s an fantasy to make you feel like everything about you is good #you’re imagining robots that pat you on the head and call you good all the time #those aren’t PEOPLE #parents are people #which- and I’m sorry people don’t know this- but you would know if you had a positive healthy relationship with any kind of parental figure #and it gets me cause I think I write feanor as a very positive kind of father #but Ive gotten SO MANY comments going ‘oh I don’t like bad dad fenaor but your stuff-‘ and I’m just like ???#I don’t write him as a bad dad! I write him as a person! a personality! and not some validation dispensing machine #and even the ‘good’ ‘great’ parents mess their kids up in some ways it’s literally impossible to not have a few hang ups from your parents #it’s about TRYING and TALKING and LOVE tho #not being perfectly accepting of everything no matter what #anyway that’s just what I had to say #new fandom challenge- write interesting parents #Tribble post

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welcomingdisaster · 3 months

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here are some random headcanons about what third-gen finweans were like as children

maedhros: know-it-all, tendency to correct adults. not extremely popular but had a solid friend group. would imitate feanor's dry sarcastic manner but with none of the bite behind it.

maglor: people pleaser. extrovert but actually fairly shy and socially anxious as a child/teen, something he eventually grew out of. combination of liking/wanting attention and being self conscious about it. very easily obsessed with books/plays/poems. always has some kinda media thing he's talking about.

celegorm: popular, extroverted, bit of a bully. easily blends into any social setting. definitely entitled/bratty about getting his way. refined manners from a young age. very good at doing something he should get in trouble for and not getting in trouble. a consequence would be good for him and he is Not getting one.

caranthir: very prone to get into fights, few friends, also a bit of a know-it-all. blunt. the opposite of celegorm; invariably would get in trouble for his bad behavior. kid who can't get away with anything.

fingon: easygoing, effortlessly popular, huge group of friends. kinda messy/inattentive at times. happy to get involved with anything you're up to. loud-ass laugh; bad at figuring out how loudly he's talking in general. happy to hype up whatever his friends are doing. definite daddy's boy. builds up so much good will from parents/teachers that when he gets in trouble people assume he had good reason to.

turgon: willful, introverted but popular nonetheless. the kid who is so set in his beliefs/ideas that other kids immediately assume he knows what he's talking about; leader from a very young age. kid who spends the whole recess making up the rules to his game.

aredhel: actually fairly quiet/understated but stubborn as fuck. temper activated rarely, but kinda a nuclear force when it is.

finrod: extroverted but also deep down a little bit anxious and eager to please. wants to get a good grade in social interactions. perfectionist; has a hard time letting go of mistakes. very very eager to help people. please let him carry that.

orodreth: wants to be exactly like finrod but doesn't have the same obsessive perfectionism and tends to fall short. quiet but very friendly. easily lets others (read: finrod) do things for him.

#lena speaks #these are based basically just on vibes sorry #i don't have strong headcanons for the others so i'm not including them

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scatteredlight1 · 4 months

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Getting along with others:

House of Feanor

Maedhros - Gets along with everyone. He might not like them, but he gets along with them regardless. It’s to set a good example for his brothers, since neither of his parents are stellar role models in this case.

Maglor - Doesn’t get along with anyone. Always has some problem or the other with them, their hair, their clothes, their voice, doesn’t matter. He’s always picking on them, but he’s not too rude about it.

Celegorm - Gets along with anyone who doesn’t annoy him. The list keeps decreasing as the days pass but he’s cheerful enough and forgetful enough that he won’t start an argument in the middle of a family function, probably.

Caranthir - No one tries to get along with him. He’s brash and rude and would prefer to not be anywhere near anyone who is going to irritate him (and everyone irritates him).

Curufin - Gets along, reluctantly, with all of five people - his wife, Celebrimbor, Feanor, Nerdanel and surprisingly enough, Finrod. He doesn’t particularly like the last one, but he doesn’t send Finrod as many scathing retorts as he sends any of his own brothers, so everyone assumes they’re friends.

Amrod - He gets along with people until they call him Amras, at which point he leaves. He has no problems with being distant from the rest of his family and would rather spend time alone than be called the wrong name.

Amras - Gets along with everyone. He has no problems with anything and is willing to do everything so everyone is happy to spend time with him.

Feanor - Depends on his mood. Sometimes he’s in a good mood and will get along with everyone, including Fingolfin, which shocked his half brother into silence. At other times, he’s disagreeable enough to drive even Maedhros away, and that’s a hard task to accomplish.

Nerdanel - She’s polite to everyone, but in a blunt, straight forward way. She doesn’t insult anyone, but she doesn’t compliment anyone either. No one knows who she gets along with best, but some assume it’s Feanor. What she doesn’t put up with is people who either insult her family or who don’t even bother listening to her opinion.

#silmarillion #silm #lotr #sons of feanor #feanor #nerdanel #silm headcanons #silm fandom #tolkien #headcanons

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lendmyboyfriendahand · 2 months

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Trans Celegorm

Celegorm was born female. Strong-daughter hasty-riser, whose hair looks just like her grandmother.

Celegorm at ten knowing she is different somehow from the other girls. It’s not just the privileges of rank, or her discomfort with the expectations of a princess of the Noldor. Something about the role in society that Celegorm is supposed to take up just sits wrong, as much as she tries to ignore it.

Celegorm’s period starts at 12 and she hates it, hates her body, hates knowing she’ll never grow as tall and as broad as her father or Maedhros. Her body is built for giving new life, so Celegorm learns how to take life instead. She asks to join Orome’s hunt and is told she’s too young. She does everything she can to practice the skills anyway.

Celegorm is accepted to join the hunt at 15, when she manages to sneak up on Tilion. Running with the maiar who view her as weak because she’s an incarnate who didn’t build her muscles from the atoms up to be the best at snapping a deer’s neck, not because she’s a girl. Celegorm not knowing why this feels better, but at least she can fight and track when her head gets too full of circling thoughts. Celegorm can sneak up on anything, and learns quickly enough how to avoid leaving a blood trail of her own whether it’s from a scrape on her arm or from her cunt.

Celegorm trying to feel good in her body, and succeeding in the moments when she’s clothed, or when she’s not being judged. But now her tits have grown and she hates them, hates how they get in the way of her bow unless she binds them down, how when she goes home Maedhros says it’s improper to wrestle with her (and maybe he’s just stuffy and formal now, but also Celegorm is a very hands on fighter.) Celegorm hates how everyone expects her to wear clothes that are wrong, tailored to emphasize the chest not the shoulders, flowing and getting in the way. Sure, everyone has to wear robes at court, but then Father can come home and just wear an apron and trousers in the forge while Celegorm can’t.

Celegorm at 17 realizing she wants to be a man.

Celegorm at 17 thinking no one will take her seriously, she’s not even of age, and has always been weird anyway. Everyone will say it’s just about not fitting in to normal society.

Celegorm realizing that even her parents don’t truly understand her – no, him. Not in this at least. Sure, Feanor bakes according to his mother’s recipe, and Nerdanel wrestles huge blocks of marble into place. But Feanor is a man and Nerdanel is a woman.

Celegorm figuring screw it, they can’t stop him.

Celegorm is skilled with a knife by now. If he cuts the lumps off his chest, no one will be able to tell he’s a girl from a distance. And if someone is close enough to see between his legs, they’re close enough for Celegorm to punch.

Celegorm will run away to the forest for a couple years and come back outside Alqualonde. Just another elf who had to take a break from cities to live in nature, it’s not that rare. Another wild man of the hills.

Nerdanel first realizes that Celegorm is trans when she opens her daughter’s room to find Celegorm about to conduct amateur surgery. Celegorm has put thought and preparation into this; he has a sharp knife and boiling water to clean it, and a pile of boiled rags (the remains of his bedsheet), and a chair set up in front of the mirror. The chair is draped in another sheet, and there’s a towel on the floor. Celegorm has a thoughtful look and is drawing on his breasts with charcoal, trying to plan the cuts. He needs to save some of the skin, can’t ruin his own hide, and he needs to avoid arteries though he’s never butchered anything with an elven shape…

Nerdanel panics and yells. After establishing that it’s not a suicide attempt (“If I wanted to die, I’d just go provoke a bear, Mom, it would be far less hassle!”), she’s still rather concerned. And Nerdanel knows that if she takes Celegorm’s knife, Celegorm will just find or make another. So even though this topic really out to be considered for longer in her opinion, Nerdanel doesn’t say that.

“Would you please get dressed and we can find a practiced surgeon in the city? You deserve the best care possible in changing your body.” Nerdanel compares it to how Celegorm had a personal trainer when building muscle as a child, to make sure he didn’t sprain anything. And does Celegorm really want to risk severing an artery, or cutting a tendon?

Celegorm agrees. Gender reassignment surgery isn’t actually a common thing in Tirion – most people who transition go for a years-long hormonal thing, or let the Valar build them a whole new body and move their spirit into it. But Celegorm knows this body, and he isn’t going to wait.

Specifically, by the time they go home they’ve talked to four different surgeons and found one with availability in the next week, assuming no one gets in an archery accident in the meantime.

Celegorm goes in. He gets his tits cut off. He sees no reason to get a cock – he’s already learned how to piss without getting it on his boots.

Celegorm eventually tries sex. He laughs at everyone who says you need a cock to be dominant. All you need is to be able to pin your partner to the bed and use them as a dildo.

Canon still happens. Celegorm still kidnaps Luthien and threatens her in an attempt to marry her. He’s not super invested in having kids, and if Luthien wants them he’s sure Melian can do some magic to make sure the babies share his blood.

(Amras is also a transman. With experience, Nerdanel and Feanor notice early enough to get him puberty blockers.)

#my fic #my writing #silmarillion #silm #celegorm #hasty riser #trans Tolkien

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thesummerestsolstice · 2 months

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Unwritten Fics game

I was tagged by @runawaymun to talk about all my as-of-yet unwritten fic ideas! I have many, many of them. Here are a few. Feel free to send me asks about any of them, or to tell me which ones you'd most like to read in the tags!

Earendil-drinks-the-Silmail-AU: see Tumblr post here. Elwing gives Earendil the Silmaril's light to try and heal him from an illness, and both he (and later E&E) now have the light of the Silmaril within them. This causes problems for the Oath of Feanor. Can't decide whether to make it serious and heartbreaking or extremely silly.

Immortal Elros AU: definitely need to post about this one. In which Elros sees the mortals who will become the people of Numenor, loves them, and decides the best way to help them is to be immortal, to protect their descendants and maintain their legacy long after they're gone. He becomes Numenor's beloved guardian, caring for it's people for centuries. This all goes pretty well until Tar-Mairon shows up on the island.

Faustian Bargain AU: when both Gil-Galad and Celebrimbor are captured during Eregion's fall, Elrond makes a dangerous deal with Sauron to get them back. In exchange for their release, Elrond offers to become Sauron's captive, and to help him in his efforts to reach the Void and free Morgoth. Elrond, of course, has other plans. So do the now-free (and incredibly worried) Gil Galad and Celebrimbor.

Unexpected Problems: see Tumblr posts here and here. All about the issues Elrond runs into in Valinor– from people debating about whether or not he counts as an Ainur to Noldor being scandalized that he only wears a couple pounds of jewelry. Also his repeated attempts to stop Galadriel and Bilbo from completely destroying Valinorian society.

The Love of a Parent: Elrond's parents continue to look out for him, whether from beyond the circles of the world or from the stars above. Probably largely outsider POV. A chance for more eldritchry.

On Estel: In which Earendil goes into the void, searching for Maeglin's lost spirit. Slight AU in the sense that it's very Maeglin sympathetic, and has him having a good familial relationship with Turgon, Idril, and Earendil.

Ten Little Soldier Boys: my take on who Finrod's faithful ten were, why they were so loyal, and the moments they each decided they would give anything to keep Finrod safe. OC heavy but very dear to my heart.

Misfits, Outcasts, and other Characters of Ill-Repute: a series of oneshots about the various people who end up in Rivendell and how they got there. Includes canon characters (Glorfindel, Erestor, Lindir, etc.) and some OCs (including an old Feanorian diehard and one of Thingol's bodyguards, and, of course, Garthaglir the Library Orc)

No pressure, but I'm going to second Runawaymun's tagging of @jaz-the-bard (I don't think they've done the game yet but I might've missed it on their blog)

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