#5 things you should never say in a job interview | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tswhiisftteedr · 24 days

Note

Hiya!! I was wondering if I could ask for some nsfw fem reader x husk (hazbin hotel) where husk basically just eating reader out, face sitting etc.

Also keep up the good writing!! I love your writing from what I’ve seen and i hope you do well with your other requests too!!

Don’t worry, I’m right here with you. ☆ Oneshot

Soft Dom!Husk x Sub!Hotel Resident!Fem!Reader:

After spending quite sometimes getting to know each other, you and husk finally begin dating. Anyways, today Lucifer came to the hotel for the first time and that was a super, but it wasn’t the main event of yours and husk’s days. So after an altercation with Alastor, husk seek solace in you for comfort, which you give, and he decides to thank you in his own special way for it.

Warnings: Mature Content, Not Proofread, Drinking, that scene where alastor uses husk soul chain and threatens him, Unspecified Vices, Mutual Pinning, Cunnilingus, Fingering, Soft Husk, Sorta Bad Written Comfort.

Words: 10567

Note: There is smut, BUT, beside the intro which is just suggestive, the smut will be at the end, so If you don’t want smut and just fluff you can just not read it. It’s the same with my last Zestial work, it’s like 3/4 sfw and 1/5 smut. Btw Antonio Esfandiar aka "The Magician" is a professional poker player and former professional magician, known for his elaborate chip tricks. That’s the only reason I mentioned him if you were curious about that lol.

☆ more under the cut. ☆

Honestly, you had attempted to question how things had ended up like that—

“Ah, fuck, Husk, it's too much!” You cried out in overstimulation.

“Shh, it's okay, baby, I know you can handle it,” he reassured, softly stroking the underside of your right thigh to offer comfort.

— But truthfully, every train of thought you’d tried to start would derail quicker than the previous one. Without doubt, that man, Husk— he would be the end of you.

Yet, no need for worry as, I, your illustrious ‘historian,’ am here to recount the tale of how you found yourself in this predicament; as you're obviously too preoccupied getting your brains fucked out by Antonio Esfandiari over there to form any sort of recollection, or even a coherent thought for that matter.

Now, let’s backpedal four months ago, shall we?

You had been in the infernal realm for a little while, precisely half a year. You managed to secure a job and a place to stay, but ‘living’ down here was anything but easy.

To survive, you had to stretch your earnings, rationing food and water to make them last longer than they should, leaving you hungry more than once.

And when you were really desperate for cash—well, let's just say you had to resort to some unsavory means to get your hands on it.

Additionally, it had been a month since Princess Morningstar introduced her hotel to the public of the hell on 666 news. As expected, the masses of sinners inhabiting the pride ring ridiculed the princess and her redemption-themed endeavors.

Initially, the idea seemed far-fetched, as if redemption were truly an option — Why hadn't anybody else proposed it before?

That's what you and your friends had agreed upon when first watching the interview. But as time passed, you began to reconsider your friend group's shared consensus. Perhaps, just maybe, ‘redemption wasn't such a crazy concept after all.’

That's why you now found yourself standing in front of the princess's Hazbin Hotel, formerly known as Happy Hotel, nervous and with slightly sweaty palms.

Summoning all the courage you could muster, you knocked on the large, stained glass-filled windows, as ‘it was now or never’.

After waiting patiently for about five minutes, just as you were about to turn away—possibly never to return—as the building seemed vacant. The large doors swung open, revealing the princess herself standing before you.

"Um, is this the redemption hotel from the news?" you inquired, even though it was plain as day from the building's illuminated 'Hazbin Hotel' sign and the fact that the princess, the one who pitched the hotel on 666 news, was literally standing in front of you.

With the brightest and most joyful smile you'd seen down here, she opened her mouth to speak. "Oh mygod!Ohmygod!Ohmygod!Areyousomeonewho’sactuallyinterestedinthehotel???likeyougenuinelywanttotryandgiveredemptionashot???!!!Holyshit,thisisthehotel’sgreatestsinceSirPentioushasjoined!!!!" Princess Morningstar blurted out in a rush, as if she didn't deliver the information fast enough, you would leave.

As you tried to make sense of her rapid jumble of words—something about 'actually wanting to be redeemed' and someone named 'Sir Righteous' or was it 'Sir Delicious'?—you also noticed a crowd of individuals walking closer to the doors.

The group consisted of six people: A woman with an X over her eye, wielding an angelic weapon—'Delightful,' you sarcastically thought.

A grumpy tuxedo cat man with a red bow, his fur acting as some sort of substitute for his lack of shirt; he was also 'sort of handsome, y'know?'.

Then there was a snake man that screamed steampunk; he seemed sort of familiar, but you didn’t remember where you’d seen his slithery mug before.

There was also a tiny woman with one eye; she seemed full of energy and sorta stabby.

Then, second to last, we had—Unholy hell! It’s the porn actor Angel Dust! You remembered the princess mentioning him as a patron here, but you hadn’t expected to encounter him in the flesh and fur.

He seemed to notice the starstruck gaze in your eyes caused by his presence, so he shot you a wink. With a bit of internal fangirling along the way, you finally managed to get your heart rate to go back down.

You then shift your attention back to the rest of the crowd and notice the final person standing there, and HOLY SHIT, THE RADIO DEMON IS THERE—!

Your heart rate shoots back up, and you take a step back in fear, causing you to stumble over a pebble and fall on your ass. You curse yourself for being too engrossed in the sight of a celebrity to ignore the immense danger that is literally right there in front of you.

"Why, hello there, and who might you be, you wayward soul? It’s not often that we see sinners seeking out redemption." the Radio Demon inquired, accompanied by what you could only assume was his ‘iconic smile’.

You obviously didn’t know firsthand, as, for one, you hadn’t met the demon before, and for another, he was apparently in the sixth year and a half of his seven-year getaway when you manifested.

But you had heard the stories, and they were enough to make you absolutely petrified at the sight of that grin plastered on his face.

He seemed to rather enjoy your pitiful display, while you only grew more terrified.

“Oh no, are you okay? Didn’t hurt yourself, did you?” The princess asked, breaking you away from your scared state and extending her hand.

With a bit of hesitation, you took it. “Uh, no. No, I’m okay, it was just a little fall.” you told her.

“Oh, okay, I’m glad it was nothing. Anyways, welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, we are so glad to have you here!” She said as she began to lead you inside, and the others followed, each finding their place within the hotel;

The cat man heading to the bar, Angel Dust lounging on one of the couches, the little woman chasing bugs around, and both the radio demon and the spear-wielding woman following you and Charlie.

Once she had you comfortably seated on one of the lounge's couches, she began to introduce herself and everyone present. “Sooo, hi. I’m Charlie, the owner and founder of this hotel.”

“I think she already knows who you are, princess” the cat man interjected. “Oh, right,” she realized.

While all you could think upon hearing him speak was, 'Fuck. Even his voice is sexy.'

“Anywho, this is Alastor, our gracious facility manager.” Charlie said, pointing at the Radio Demon. “Your pleasure to meet.” he told you.

“And this is Vaggie, the co-founder and my girlfriend.” Charlie continued. Vaggie approached you, and you shook hands. “Nice to meet you.” she said. “Likewise.” you responded.

“Next up, we have Husk, our bartender, and Niffty, our cleaning staff.” she gestures towards the bar. “Nice to meet you.” Husk offers, while Niffty chimes in with a big, eccentric “Hello!”

“And lastly, we have our residents and your potential fellow guests if you decide to stay.” she adds with a slightly unsure chuckle. “Angel and Sir Pentious!”

“No offense, Charls, but the broad probably knew who I was, no need for an intro.” Angel quips teasingly before approaching you. “But anyways, it’s good to see a new face around here, so welcome, toots.” he says, extending his hand, which you shake. “Thanks for your hospitality.” you reply.

Feeling a little less on edge, you approach the final resident. “Sir Pentious, right? It’s nice to meet you.” you say, extending your hand. “Oh, no, darling, the pleasurrre izzz all mine.” he replies, shaking your hand. Just as you finish, you hear a small gasp from Charlie.

You turn to look at her, and she says apologetically, "I totally forgot to ask you for your name! I am so sorry for that." With a comforting smile, you tell her, "It’s no worries, really. I’m Y/N, Y/N L/N. Nice to meet you again, I guess."

“Nice to meet you again too, Y/N,” she says with a giggle. Then she adds, “Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask you, what brought you to the hotel? I mean, what led you our way?”

“I saw your interview on 666 news with Katie Killjoy a month ago.” you tell her.

“Oh, you did? Um, did you see alllll of it?” Charlie asks, momentarily shocked and a little nervous afterward, but you understood why.

“If you’re talking about the fist fight and the news anchor on fire, yes, I did. It’s probably the thing most people remember from that news segment.” you answer her, confirming her assumptions.

“Oh, right.” Charlie says, a little embarrassed.

“Well, if you saw that, then why are you here? Are you trying to mock us in person?” Vaggie asks you, getting slightly defensive as the interview was not the best display of the hotel.

“No, nothing like that.” you reassure at first. Then you continue, “Well, actually, at first when I saw it on the news, I definitely laughed at the idea of a redemption hotel. So did my friends. Actually, I think everyone did. I heard from one of my imp friends that even in the other rings, people were making fun of it.” You say, deflating Charlie further and further with each word.

"But," you begin once more, bringing back some sort of hope to her,

"The more I thought about it, the less crazy stupid it all seemed. I mean, at first, I was like, 'If it's such a good idea, why didn't anyone think of it before?'.

Then, with more reflection, I realized that even if someone had pitched something like it before, there wouldn't be a big trace of it anyways.

I mean, you saw how people reacted when you presented it; it was made fun of and forgotten by most.

Also, considering the fact that the powerhouses of our ring profit from the fact that there are people down here to exploit, even if someone had the same idea and people to back them up, it would definitely have been shut down and covered up.

Because if people get redeemed and get out of hell, the big fishes don’t make as much profit anymore." You explain, and this seemed to reason with Charlie and the others around.

“Honestly, I think the only reason you don’t have people directly targeting you and your hotel is because you’re the princess. I mean, sure, people can make fun of you, but actually attacking you, well, that’s a no-go territory,” you add on.

And everyone, even Charlie, who seemed to like staying in the delusion that ‘in every demon there is a rainbow,’ couldn’t help but agree. If she wasn’t the princess, there was sure to be some people coming by and hurting everyone here, ‘just because.’

“Anyways, when I made peace with the concept, I thought, why not me when it came to redemption. I mean, sure, I did some unsavory things to end up down here, but I wasn’t some serial killer or sex trafficker either,” you explain further.

“Plus, I have all eternity, well, unless an exorcist’s blade or some Carmine weapon-wielding freak comes my way—“ you slightly deviate but remember to get back on track,

“Anyways, the point is if I can do whatever for ‘basically forever,’ why not give redemption a shot. I mean, worst-case scenario, I just avoid doing bad stuff for nothing, but at least that simultaneously keeps me out of trouble, so it’s not ‘that bad,’ you know?” You finish your explanation and look back at Charlie to see the immense joy in her eyes caused by someone actually taking a full interest in being part of her project.

“Well, I am so glad you think that way, Y/N. And the fact that you decided to come here even though your entourage still thinks, well, that the hotel is a joke, was very brave of you.

Also, just letting you know, as you may not be aware since it was not mentioned during the interview you watched, but here at the Hazbin Hotel, we offer free rooms, food, electricity, and if you're feeling like it, from time to time alcohol, though moderation is more than encouraged.” she informed.

“Well, that’s great. I mean, I didn’t really think about the fact that you may have asked for cash for staying here, but as it is some sort of a ‘nonprofit,’ it does make sense that you don’t.” you tell her in a relieved manner.

“Of course, we want to help people here. It wouldn’t be fair for us to ask money from our guests. Anyways, why don’t I go over what would be your weekly schedule, hotel-wise, as a resident, and then I can show you to your room?” she asked.

“That would be wonderful.” you tell her.

It had been a couple of weeks since you joined the hotel, and you would say that things have been going ‘alright.’

I mean, Charlie’s ‘activities’ were more often silly than not, but they didn’t necessarily do any harm. The hardest part was staying away from your vices—‘that was the real kicker’.

Which brings us to why you were currently seated on a bar stool, gradually drowning yourself in alcohol as Husk poured drink after drink at your request.

"You know, if you keep pushing away your vices but then return here every time instead, you're just fostering a dependence on booze," Husk cautioned, sliding your fifth Midori Sour over to you. "And when you finally have to cut out drinking altogether, you'll likely revert to your old habits. You're turning this ‘rehabilitation thing’ into a sort of yo-yo diet, if you ask me.”

You stared at the drink after finishing your previous one.

— You had first tasted something like it when you went out for your first legal drink at 21, asking for something sweet with a bit of a kick alcohol-wise.

The bartender had recommended it to you, then as you drank it, he went on a rant about how it was "made with Midori melon liqueur, lemon juice, and simple syrup" and that "It's sweet, refreshing, and has a medium alcoholic content" — the “perfect drink for you”.

He was good-looking, like the current bartender in front of you, so you had let him talk—just like you let Husk talk.

Sure, having spent a considerable amount of time down here and living well beyond his twenties, you could acknowledge that Husk did have some wisdom to himself.

However, there were moments — particularly when he embarked on his tangents about how "you won’t find your answers at the bottom of a bottle,"— then, you simply wanted to shut him up.

Whether it was by pointing out that while he might be correct in his assessment, he failed to offer real advice on how to find those answers. Saying shit like "don’t do that, there are better ways to deal with your issues" yet always neglecting to explain what those "other ways" might be — frankly, it was all quite frustrating.

But each time it occurred, you chose to keep your mouth shut to avoid any conflict. After all, from what you had observed, you genuinely liked Husk as a person and didn’t want any tension between the two of you.

Nevertheless, despite your growing frustration with the men, your mind couldn’t help but entertain the other option that would allow you to ‘catch the cat’s tongue’; wondering how quickly he would stop talking if you pressed your lips to his.

Yet, ultimately, it remained a mere fantasy, something confined to the realm of imagination, one never to enter reality. —

“Thanks, Husk,” was all you said as you took the glass and downed your goddamn Midori Sour.

Several hours had passed since your fifth drink, and more than one other had entered your system by now. You and Husk were now discussing on a more personal level.

“It’s all so weird, you know. It’s not like my soul is trapped in a contract like yours or Angel’s,” Husk’s face slightly winced at the reminder that he, in fact, didn’t own his own soul. However, he stayed quiet and let you talk without interjecting, as he respected you and you were pouring your heart out. “Yet, I can’t help but feel like it is,” you told him. “I try to be better, I really do, but it’s so, so hard not to do the bad things I’m not supposed to do when they all feel so fun and right to me in the moment. I mean, I do regret them afterward, but I keep wanting to do them anyway.”

You take a sip of your drink, and Husk follows suit. “You know, you would think the moment I feel the most trapped is right after I’ve done what I wasn’t supposed to,” you muse, contemplating the complexities of your situation. “I had my fun, and as I suffer the consequences, I feel encaged. But it’s not. It’s actually right before I even do it. I feel it in my whole body—a feeling that this is the only way for me, that I can never let go of this high.

No matter how hard I push myself to get better, to be better, I’m not really leaving the cage. I’m just pacing around in circles, pretending that the loop isn’t there and I’m actually getting away.

I just want to run, but I’m afraid that if I actually try, I’ll probably just hit my head against the cage’s bars,” you confess, tears of anxiety welling in your eyes as you begin to sniffle.

With that, Husk grabs your hand and begins to rub soothing circles on it with his thumb, offering comfort in his touch as he speaks up. “Listen, I can’t say that everything will be alright. That's bullshit, and that saying has always been bullshit, but it’s even more full of holes down here,” he pauses to take another sip of his drink, collecting his thoughts. “And I personally know firsthand how it feels to be where you are right now. And I mean it, even without the whole Alastor thing, though it is a big part of it.”

Pausing once more, then taking a big breath, “You know, I used to be an overlord once,” he reveals, capturing your attention even further. “Yeah, and it was nice to have that power. But when you’re dealing with souls while also being a gambler, the stakes are pretty high. And losing a few hands can be more than a little dangerous. So when you’re down on your luck, you turn to anything to keep you afloat, even making deals yourself.”

Husk continued his story, delving into his past life before he was sent to the underworld. “But even before that shit show, I had another for me up there. Back when I was alive, I was a magician, a pretty big one at that. But at some point, I got into booze. It wasn’t a big issue at first, but it soon spiraled out of control after some other bad choices.

You see, a buddy of mine, another magician, had a gig at Caesars Palace. Being the good friend he was, he invited me along to party with him after his show. And party we did. It was one wild night—we drank, got plastered, enjoyed the company of some lovely ladies and fellas, and, most importantly, we played games.

That night marked my first taste of gambling, and it was exhilarating. I decided to play it safe and not bet too much, but it turned out Lady Luck was on my side. I won big, about two thousand dollars, while only betting twenty bucks.”

Husk paused, reflecting on those memories. “After that, I couldn’t help but come back the next day. Call it beginner's luck or whatever, but I was on a roll. In the span of two weeks, I had made enough money to last me two lifetimes.

But back then, it didn’t satisfy me, and it still didn’t when I first got down here either. Anyways, even after hitting such a big jackpot, I didn’t stop. I actually stopped magic altogether and fully transitioned to being a full-time gambler.

And for a while, it worked. But money wasn’t the only thing I got greedy with.

The amount of alcohol became too much for my body to take, and one day, I just dropped dead. A cardiac arrest was all it took to end me, while at the time it happened, I was convinced I was on top of the world.

Then I ended up down here. So, after spending quite some time just drowning myself in alcohol, only to make my alcoholism worse, I sort of got back on my feet. I became powerful and an overlord, but you already know how that went.

The both times I thought I was indestructible were also the both times when I was the reason behind why I got destroyed.”

You took hold of Husk's hand back, no longer content to simply let him hold yours.

“So now, every time I'm about to take a swig or play a game, while I may be confident in my skills, I can't shake the feeling that if I wanted to seek something else out, a different career path or way of life, I just couldn’t — that I've already burned those bridges for myself for all of eternity.

I feel trapped by my own actions and technically am too, but the worst part is that I don’t know if I’ll ever break free. But you, as you said, still have your soul. So maybe, even if it feels insurmountable right now, you can find the key to your cage and finally step out of it. And maybe, if you’re feeling generous, you can come by and try to find mine with me.”

Husk's way of speaking offered a different kind of comfort compared to Charlie's approach. Yet, it somehow brought you closure. It was honest and reliable, two things hard to find down here.

You gently squeeze his hand in a gesture of support before speaking up, "If I manage to find that key and finally step out of my cage, I promise you'll be the first person I’ll help find theirs, Husk." Your words are accompanied by a warm smile, which he reciprocates.

"Well, if you're the type to make empty promises, then I'm afraid to tell you but you're stuck with that one now, sweetheart. I'll hold you to it.” he teasingly responds, lightening the mood. "You wouldn't back out after giving a poor old soul like myself hope, now would you?"

"Never!" you assure him, the tears now long gone.

Following that evening, you and Husk grew closer, engaging in deeper conversations with each other than with the other residents.

It proved surprisingly effortless to open up to him once he shed his ‘old wise bartender’ persona. Despite the decades that separated you, both of you felt understood by the other.

Thus, when you began suggesting to Husk that you hang out together outside of the hotel, it didn't take much persuasion to get him on board. You believed it would be beneficial for him to step outside the confines of the hotel, considering it was in some part the physical manifestation entrapment.

Additionally, you planned to avoid places like casinos or bars to help both of you steer clear of your vices.

You envisioned a delightful day filled with laughter and happiness, far from anything that could potentially cause harm to either of you.

That's why you found yourselves in the fourth clothing store of the day. While you had picked up a few items from each previous store after some browsing, Husk had merely glanced around without finding anything to pique his interest.

As you perused the winter section, you stumbled upon the perfect ensemble: a charming white knitted skirt adorned with two small fluffy pompons, complemented by a matching top and a white bubble coat trimmed with fur.

Knowing you already had the perfect shoes to complete the look at home, you approached Husk with the outfit in hand.

"Soooo, what do you think of this one?" you inquired, prompting him to turn away from whatever had captured his attention to inspect your find.

"Hmm, well, it doesn't seem like it covers much. Are you sure you found it in the ‘winter section’? You'd probably freeze your ass off wearing that in the winter cold," he teased with a playful comment.

With an exaggerated sigh and a playful hip pop, you quip, "You just don’t understand, it's all about the 'aesthetic'," adding a fake tone of disdain that prompts both of you to burst into laughter at your absurdity.

Returning to a more serious tone, you inquire, "But really, aside from the fact that it's not exactly suitable for cold weather, what do you think of it?"

"Well, if we overlook the fact that you'd freeze solid walking outside in this, I have to admit the outfit is pretty nice. I think it would suit you," he replies earnestly before adding with a teasing voice, "and your aesthetic," eliciting more laughter from both of you.

You then notice something in his hands and ask, "Anywho, what do you have there?"

"Oh, it's nothing, just a little trinket that caught my eye. I probably won't buy it, though," he says, showing you the item—a watch with a roulette pattern on it. It was a bit pricey, but not overly extravagant. It looked cute and suited him well.

"It looks really nice. It would suit you very nicely," you tell him, and he smiles sheepishly in response.

"You think so? Thanks. Well, I'm going to put it back. You seem to be done with this store, so I shouldn't keep it in my hands. Wouldn't want to walk out of the store with it without paying," he says, trying to act nonchalant, but it's obvious he's a bit disappointed.

As you consider his situation, you realize that the hotel doesn't really pay Husk to work there, and all the money he used to make was based on gambling.

By staying away from it, he's basically broke now. With that realization, you make up your mind;

"Oh, wait. If you're not going to buy it, you won't mind if I do," you tell him, the gears turning in your head.

"Oh, yeah, no problem," he says as he passes the watch in its box to you.

You then proceed to the checkout and pay your dues. You ask for a separate bag for the watch, which earns you a slightly confused glance from Husk, but you don't mind. As you step out of the store, you suggest going out for ice cream to finish your outing, and he has no problem with it.

As you both enjoy your dessert, you pause to retrieve the bag containing the watch. "Here, this is for you," you tell him, offering the gift.

"Gosh, Y/N, I can't accept that. It's a very nice gift and all, but I can't just take it for nothing. I really appreciate it, really, but I don't deserve it," he rambles to you. Before he could delve further into why he possibly 'didn't deserve it,' you stop him.

"Listen, Husk, it's no problem. I have the money, so it's no big deal for me. Plus, you've become a dear friend of mine by now. Is it that bad for me to want my friends to have nice things?" you ask him.

"No, but I don't think such pricey things should be handed out to anybody just because 'you have the money,'" he states.

"But Husk, you're not just anybody, you're someone dear to me, someone I care about. When I saw the watch, I could only picture it on your wrist. I bought that watch for you and you only.

Also, before you mention returns, that store has a no-return policy.

And lastly, if you feel that bad about it, telling yourself you don’t deserve it, which is not true, you’re a wonderful man who deserves to have nice things— anyways, I interjected, my point is if you feel bad just take it as; this is a gift from me to you, for spending the day shopping around with me even though you weren’t interested in the stores we were going to,” you tell him kindly. As you see him still hesitating, you add one more thing, “Also, you can just not keep it and sell it if you really don’t want it that badly.” That breaks him away from the self-loathing he was internally building.

“Of course not, I’m not going to sell it. It’s a gift from you, a very nice gift at that, and I would never think of selling it,” he tells you, a bit protective of the gift now, which is what you wanted.

“So, looks like you’re keeping it after all.” you tell him, noticing a slight pout on his face as he realizes his words, but then he playfully rolls his eyes and now has a grin on his face. ‘Looks like he has finally accepted the gift.’

"Anyway, thanks for the watch. I’ll make sure to start wearing it as soon as we get to the hotel.” he tells you with that charming smile of his.

"I told you it was no problem." you reply, your face mirroring his.

"Also, if you're comfortable with buying me watches out of the blue, does that mean you would be into being my full-time sugar mommy—" he jokes, which you quickly shut down with a "Not even in your dreams." making both of you laugh once more.

Hangouts like this one continued, ranging from outings to different venues like theaters and restaurants to engaging in activities at the hotel.

For instance, Husk took it upon himself to teach you poker once you mentioned your lack of knowledge in the game.

It was a fun experience, filled with laughter. Turns out, you were quite good at it, although never as skilled as Husk, which occasionally led to moments of rage on your part. However, these instances always ended in laughter.

Currently, you were enjoying a drink with both Husk and Angel at the lounge’s bar;

“You’d think with all that money, he would be able to buy prescription glasses that looked like his current sunglasses,” you commented after Angel mentioned his boss, Valentino's poor eyesight.

“That's what I said! Like, if you're going to be a horrible piece of shit who literally built his empire off being one, you could at least get custom glasses so you could stop looking like an absolute moron when you read or count money. He quite literally spent half an hour counting three bills! How ridiculous is that?” Angel exclaimed, his voice fluctuating in pitch due to the alcohol.

In fact, all of you were a bit tipsy. Each of you displayed it differently—Angel was very excitable and giggly, you felt more sleepy, inclined to lie down, and Husk was more tactile, currently holding one of your hands while using the other to pet your head between sips of his drink.

That last part finally seemed to dawn on Angel, and he couldn’t help but point it out to both of you.

“So, did y’all fuck?” The effeminate fellow inquired.

“What?” You and Husk asked simultaneously, both of you pulling away from each other, visibly flustered.

“I mean, you’ve been getting cozy since we sat down, and I get that you two are ‘friends,’” Angel sarcastically emphasized the word 'friends' with air quotes, “but honestly, every time we get together and drink, you two are always holding each other. Sure, you're not openly cuddling and all, but I can’t remember the last time you weren’t holding hands when drinking. So, I think it’s reasonable for me to ask if you two are fucking” Angel explained his logic, leaving both you and Husk to face the current situation.

Despite Husk initiating the physical contact himself and you allowing it, as well as both of you holding hands, neither of you were aware of how intimate your actions appeared until Angel mentioned it.

It seems somewhat unbelievable, but it’s true.

Neither of you were consciously planning it; your bodies simply expressed your subconscious desire to be close to each other without either of you realizing it.

“Um, no, we didn’t,” you tell Angel, your voice quieter than before out of embarrassment.

“Yeah, we haven’t done anything like that,” Husk admits, matching your tone. Usually, even when talking to Angel, who was a dear friend to both of you, Husk would be more closed off about the sexual or romantic aspect of his afterlife. But the alcohol and the close proximity to you—his comfort person—seemed to have helped him be more open.

Taking a gulp of his drink and finishing it, Angel then speaks up once more. “Then do y’all wanna hook up?” he asks nonchalantly, to which both of you reply with a simultaneous “Angel!”

"Okay, okay, I'll stop," he says, accompanied by a laugh. The conversation is dropped, yet both you and Husk couldn't help but still glance at one another throughout the night, sometimes even making eye contact, which left both of you further flustered.

After Angel's comment, the next few days between you and Husk were awkward as both of you became more aware of each other's thoughts.

Neither of you outright rejected the idea of sexual attraction, and to be honest, you both had a feeling that the other felt similarly when it came to romance.

It was just awkward to actually express it, so for about a week or so, you avoided each other.

But soon the awkward tension began to dissipate. You were just more aware of each other's and your own actions, so if someone did something that crossed the lines of just being friendly, both of you would be aware of it being intentional.

For example, just like now as Husk is teaching you how to play pool;

There's nothing wrong or inappropriate about teaching your friend pool. Even when your friend corrects your form, it's still an innocent action to help you enjoy the game further as you learn the proper way to play.

However, Husk didn’t just show you how to score and watched what you did then correct your flawed form.

No, no, no, Mr. Husk over there didn’t even bother showing you beforehand how to score. He just directly positioned himself behind you, grabbed your hands, and guided you to grab the cue stick, all the while softly whispering in your ear as he directed your movements, explaining what he was doing and how it affects gameplay.

As to why Husk became so bold after a week of avoiding each other, you weren’t sure. And truth be told, he was just tired of burying his feelings deep down to avoid ruining your friendship, especially now that he knew you felt the same way he did.

That day, when you first opened up about your struggles, he felt a deep connection to you.

And when you bought him the watch, it struck a chord with him. Although he wasn’t usually one to focus on material possessions, the fact that you had spent so much on him so effortlessly meant a lot.

Especially when you insisted on him keeping it, expressing that you wanted him to have something nice.

In that moment, he felt deeply cared for, his heart racing as you assured him he deserved it and that he was dear to you.

So today, he decided to take matters into his own hands. If he had misinterpreted your signals and you rejected him, at least he would have tried, rather than spending eternity wondering ‘what if?’

"Then you do it like this," he says as he guides your hands through the motion, and you score. "You’re doing so good.” he murmurs softly near your ear. You'd like to think about the fact that praise wasn't necessary since he was literally guiding your movements, but all you could think about now is; how nice it feels to be so close to Husk. The warmth of his body against yours, how good his voice sounded so close to your ear—it's overwhelming.

Feeling like you might lose yourself if you don't act, you release the pool cue and turn to face him. Well, by facing him, I mean doing so while nearly touching faces due to how close you were to begin with. It stuns both of you for a moment, but you refuse to back down.

Leaning against the pool table for support, you muster the courage to address Husk. "Husk, um, you're really close right now..." you start, but instead of moving away, he questions, "Do you not like it?"

Feeling even more nervous, you realize lying won't work. You couldn't keep up a falsehood when it would be so obviously untruthful, and you didn't want him to get the wrong idea. "No, I like it," you admit.

"Is that all you like?" he probes further, his boldness surprising you. Before you can formulate a response, he adds, "Because I not only like being this close to you, but I also absolutely adore you." simultaneously softly caressing your cheek.

You're left breathless, muttering a quiet "fuck.." because what else could you say in this moment, besides confessing the to the man you've been attracted to since day one of meeting each other and felled in love with only a couple of months into knowing him.

But before Husk could misinterpret your use of a swear as you not being into him, you summoned all your courage and spoke out, "I also like you, Husk. Like, a lot. I found you hot since I first saw you, and soon after, I started falling for you, it’s an ‘in love-type’ of like you."

"Shit," he exclaimed, covering his mouth in disbelief. "I've also found you attractive since day one, and I think I've been in love with you since you gave me that watch," he continued, lifting the arm wearing it to showcase it. "More specifically, how you were acting towards me when you did it."

You paused for a moment, unsure of what to do next. "So, what do you want to do now?" you asked him.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. Right now, all I want is to be as close as possible to you, which is far from my usual way of behaving; I'm usually more planned and collected, but when I'm with you now, I feel like I've lost my compass. Yet instead of being anxious, I feel safe and comfortable. Isn't that weird?" he mused.

"I'm not sure if it is, but if it were, would it be weirder if I felt the same way?" you asked him, to which he chuckled.

"No, I don't think it would be weirder," he replied, his hand still resting on your cheek, which you leaned into it, almost resting your head's weight completely on it.

You gazed longingly at each other for about a minute or two until you broke the silence. "So, do you want to make out?" you asked, with ‘that’ slight goofiness in your voice that Husk had come to love.

"Fuck yeah!" Husk exclaimed, mirroring your tone of voice.

His hands transitioned from holding your face and the cue stick to one of them softly gripping your hair from the back of your head —pulling you in— while the other rested on the small of your back for support.

Then your lips finally connected:

As your lips met, you felt an explosion of passion and chemistry that you had never experienced before. Your heart raced, and your pulse pounded in your ears as your mouths danced.

You couldn't believe this was happening. Husk, the gruff and often apathetic demon you befriended, was kissing you with so much intensity and desire. It was as if all his pent-up emotions and feelings were released in that single moment.

His grip on your hair tightened slightly, pulling you even closer to him, and you could feel his heart beating just as fast as mine. You kissed hungrily like your (after)lives depended on it, your tongues entwining in a dance that made you shiver — especially the texture of your companion’s.

His tongue was in between one of a human and one of cat, it wasn’t unpleasant, quite the opposite actually. It did make you wonder how it would feel on other areas of your body. Also, something else to note was that he tasted like whiskey and smoke and honestly —you couldn't get enough.

Continuing on your movements, you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, wanting every inch of him. He groaned softly against your lips at that, breaking the kiss for a moment, and you could see the ‘need’ and ‘want’ in his eyes. They were filled with passion and affection, just like yours. He moved to kiss your jawline, trailing kisses down your neck, and you gasped softly, feeling his warm breath against your skin.

After a quick swipe at your collarbones, Husk's lips returned to yours, this time with even more fervor.

His kiss was deep and intense, as if he was trying to consume every part of you.

Your hands slid down his back, feeling his soft fur under your fingers. You could feel his muscles through it, and you loved the feeling. His hands shifted from the small of your back to my waist, pulling you closer to him, your bodies pressed tightly together.

The heat from your bodies mingled, creating an intoxicating warmth between you — a warmth you never wanted to ever quit.

As the intensity of the kiss lessened, your lips started to meet in smaller, delicate pecks. These little kisses were just as passionate as the previous ones, but they carried a different kind of emotion—endearment and love.

Each kiss was more intimate and loving than the last, sealing your connection in a way that words could never explain. Your hands still roamed each other, exploring, but with a gentleness to them.

Husk's hands moved from your waist to your sides, and you could feel his thumbs softly tracing circles on your waist. One of your hand still rested on his back, stroking softly, feeling every muscle, while the other was somewhat on his shoulder.

Finally, breaking the sweet pecks, you pulled away slightly, both panting and slightly out of breath. Your eyes locked, filled with a feelings so profound it was evident you had fallen hard for each other.

Husk gently grabbed the hand that was in his shoulder, pressing it to his lips with a soft kiss. His gaze met yours once again, and you could see the love and adoration shining in his eyes.

"You're so beautiful." Husk whispered, reaching out and gently cupping your face once more.

"Thanks, Husk. You're quite handsome yourself," you tell him with a smile. Then you add, "Anywho, does that mean we're dating now?"

"I'd like that, if you'll have me," he responds.

"There isn't anybody else I'd rather be with." you assure him.

After placing one last kiss on your lips, Husk says, "Same here."

It had been around two weeks since your mutual confession of feelings. Initially, you attempted to keep things low-key by staying in your separate rooms.

However, the amount of time spent together and the display of affection made it evident to everyone in the hotel that you were now a couple.

So, after just a week of attempting to maintain the facade, you both gave up and you moved into Husk's room.

Fast forward to today, the morning had been bustling with preparations for the arrival of Charlie's father, Lucifer, the King of Hell, after she received a call from him.

You pitched in with baking cookies and tidying up, alongside the other residents, to ensure the hotel looked presentable.

Unfortunately, given the hotel's initial state, it wasn't entirely surprising when the chandelier unexpectedly crashed from the ceiling.

What did caught you off guard was the sudden musical performance by the King of Hell, which Alastor swiftly joined, leading to an impromptu song battle between them. Though, the outcome remained undecided, as the duel was interrupted by Mimzy —apparently one of Alastor’s acquaintance— as she introduced herself.

Later down the road, after bothering your boyfriend at the bar, calling him ‘whiskers’, etc., Mimzy then engaged Angel, Pentious, and you in conversation about Alastor and her relationship with him.

But you found yourself more focused on your boyfriend slipping away than on her anecdotes. Consequently, instead of remaining there to listen to her babble, you decided to discreetly follow your boyfriend.

And now, you found yourself hiding around the corner, eavesdropping on the ongoing conversations;

"So once we have proof of redemption as possible, this whole hotel will be full of demons wanting to check out into heaven. We just need a little more time to prove it," you overhear Charlie say, but the voices grow distant, making it hard to catch the rest.

What you do clearly hear is a "Hey boss" from Husk, followed by a questioning hum from Alastor. Then Husk adds, "Can I have a word?"

"What is it?" Alastor responds.

"You and I both know Mimzy only shows up when she needs something, that bitch is trouble. And who knows what kind of demon she fucked with to come running into you this time." Husk points out.

"It's nothing I can't handle. Don't worry, Husker. Who in their right mind would cross me?" Alastor replies.

"I mean, you've been gone a while, and it's not like anybody knows why," Husk states.

"They don't need to know, and don't you worry your fuzzy head about it," Alastor dismisses.

"You may own my soul, but I ain’t your pet," Husk asserts.

Following a giggle, Alastor tells Husk, "But you are."

You're about to jump out to defend Husk, but after husk retorted with “Big talk for someone who is also on a leash.“, the atmosphere shifts, with lights flickering, leaving you petrified, especially after hearing a threatening "What did you say?"

You hear the sounds of chains and a thud, and you can only assume Alastor has dragged Husk to the floor.

"Nothing, I, um," your heart sinks at the panic in his voice, but it drops deeper once you hear Alastor's venomous words: "If you ever say that again, I will tear your soul apart and broadcast your screams for every other disrespectful wretch who dares to question me."

Husk lets out a very quiet "Understood," and Alastor replies, "Lovely," then some subdued show tunes music starts playing, then Alastor added a "Good talk, my good man. Always nice to catch up."

After the radio demon's steps fade into silence, you finally step out of your hiding spot and rush to a trembling Husk on the floor. The first thing you do is give him a tight hug and whisper softly, "It’s going to be okay, baby. I’m here with you, Husk."

In that moment, you feel a plethora of emotions—concern and worry for Husk, fear because of Alastor, and guilt due to the fact you had stayed hidden while Husk faced Alastor alone, which makes you feel really shitty. But before guilt can consume you, you focus on getting Husk to somewhere secured, like your shared room. Once he's in a safe place, you can apologize.

With your help, Husk manages to stand up, but he's still too shaken up to walk alone. You guide him to the room, and once inside, you help him onto the bed, both of you holding each other tightly.

You softly stroked the back of his head while placing gentle kisses on his forehead. As you do, you can hear him slightly sniffle, holding back tears. It's obvious he's scared, and it's completely understandable.

You kiss his closed eyelids, and finally, the dam broke. He buries his face into your chest, and by the sounds and the wet feeling of your top, you can tell he's crying. He usually handles Alastor’s antics well, but having his soul threatened like that was just too much for him. You squeeze him tighter, whispering sweet nothings and comforting words.

“You’re going to be okay. I know it was terrifying, what you had to face. It would be for anyone. But it’s going to be okay,” you assure him, stroking his fur. Then you speak out once more, “I am so, so sorry, my love. I should have faced him with you, but I was too much of a coward to do so, so I just stayed hidden.” you apologize, and for the first time since burying himself in your chest, Husk peeks his head out. His face looks puffy from the tears, but what stands out is the empathetic look in his eyes.

“It’s… it’s okay, Y/N. Alastor—that guy, he’s terrifying. I don’t blame you for not jumping in when he got all crazy like that.” he reassures, but you can't rid yourself of the remorse.

“But I should have! That's my duty as your partner, to stand by you! What if he had snapped, and… and,” you say, strong but full of guilt. As you reach the last part, you start to stutter as thoughts rush into your head, and quieter you say, “and he had acted out on those threats.”

As Husk listened to you apologize, he couldn't help but pull you closer, his heart aching for the pain you knew you felt. His fingers traced gently along your soft skin, trying to soothe the distress within you. "Y/N, it's alright... I understand why you didn't intervene," He whispered, trying to make you feel better. His gaze fell upon your damp eyes, and he felt a surge of protectiveness wash over him. "Alastor has a way of intimidating even the strongest of us, and you're no exception."

"I've been dealing with him for years, and it's taken a toll on me," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I didn’t expect you do anything in that moment, it would have potentially put you in harms way if you did. But know this, I appreciate that you came to comfort me when I needed it most." He could feel your heart pounding against his, and he held you tighter, hoping to ease your anxiety.

"I won’t get into that creepy smiling freak’s way, so he won’t do anything to me, I promise," Husk added, offering a small smile.

As you and him embraced, you felt your hearts beat in sync. Your love for each other was strong, and you knew that together, you could weather any storm.

"Mm, I guess you’re right, Husk," you said softly, your hand stroking his back in a comforting motion. "Despite my guilt, I know we’re both doing the best we can, and I'll always support you no matter what." Your words filled him with a sense of security, knowing that you were there for him through thick and thin.

"I'm glad we're in this together," he replied, his tone soft and grateful. "Even if I wasn't there for you when you needed me today, remember that I'll always have your back, no matter what Alastor throws your and our way." You tell him.

Slowly, you began to ease the tension between us by changing the subject. "Hey, do you remember that time we went to that haunted carnival in the outskirts of Hell for one of Charlie’s activity? And we got stuck on that horribly broken down Ferris wheel?" you chuckled, thinking back to the ridiculous adventure we embarked on. "We were both terrified, but we laughed our asses off, eventually.”

As he recalled the haunted carnival adventure, a soft smile formed on his face, and you couldn't help but join in his laughter. "Oh, that was a nightmare! The way we clung to each other while trying to escape that damned Ferris wheel, and we still ended up covered in cotton candy," he said, shaking his head in amusement. "I thought we'd never make it out alive."

"And don't forget about the ghostly fortune teller who told us we would be together forever," he added, giggling. "I mean, look at us now – ‘living’ proof that she was right!"

Your shared memories brought a warmth to your hearts, and tou continued to laugh about your past misadventures, pushing away the shadows of your current worries. Together, you found solace in the lightness of laughter and the strength of your bond. As you reminisced, he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, his heart overflowing with gratitude for this moment.

"You know, Y/N," he said, my voice warm and filled with love, "I wouldn't want to face any challenge with anyone else by my side.”

The warmth of his words washed over you, and he knew that he wanted to show you how much he appreciated your unwavering support. Leaning in, he whispered softly, "I'm glad you were here to comfort me. To show my appreciation, I want to give you something in return – a little treat for being there when I needed it most."

“Husk, baby, you know I didn’t do it for a reward.” You argue

“But I want to.” He tells you, with a look full of passion, his eyes drifted lower, taking in the sight of your delicate shorts, and he knew what he wanted to do next. And that made you weak, and you sorta blanked.

Gently, he untangled the fabric from your legs, revealing your soft, inviting skin. "Please, let me make you feel loved and appreciated too," he said, his voice low and full of desire.

As he next removed your underwear, he could feel your protests beginning to fade under the intensity of my gaze. With a determined smile, he leaned in close, pressing his lips to your skin. "I want to reward you, Y/N," he explained, his breath warm against your sensitive flesh. "Let me show you how much your support means to me."

Husk, typically recognized for his gruff exterior, revealed a tender side as he concentrated on satisfying you. His lips delicately trailed along the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, eliciting shivers down your spine.

Understanding the necessity of getting your mind off things if you wanted to get better —as dwelling only exacerbates the pain— he found solace in showering his beloved girlfriend with feelings of desire and appreciation. In his view, it was a mutually beneficial arrangement, serving to uplift both of your spirits, a win-win per say;

Gently, folding your legs and pushing on your thighs to stabilize you, Husk then parted your folds with his free hand, his eyes locked on the sight before him. He took a deep breath, inhaling your sweet scent, which only intensified his desire. With a purposeful hunger, he removed his hand and opted to substitute it with his tongue.

He leaned in and licked you, his tongue exploring every inch of your folds, the sensation was supreme, especially with that unusual tongue of his. As the wet muscle adventures further in your nether’s, its odd texture only becomes more pleasurable.

Especially when he would suck at your clit and let the tip of his tongue dance around it as he did. Every stroke, every caress; they spoke volumes of his appreciation for your unwavering support.

Your breath hitched as pleasure slowlybegin to build into something bigger. The intensity of Husk's actions were overwhelming, and you couldn't help but moan in response.

"Husk, I..." you murmured, uncertain if you should continue, your voice trembling with a mix of lust, love, and ‘the obvious fact that he was making you feel too good to speak normally’. But before you could protest or anything like that, he silenced you with another expert stroke of his tongue, his eyes meeting yours with determination and love.

As Husk continued to pleasure you, he knew his actions were doing more than just giving you physical gratification; they were conveying his appreciation for your presence in his life—and that sentiment was mutually understood. And he loved that he could do it that way and you would both comprehend it.

Bringing back his hand into the mix , his skilled fingers—carefully used not to scratch you— and tongue worked in harmony, driving you towards a climax that mirrored the depth of his feelings. Your moans grew louder, filling the room with the sound of your pleasure, and he couldn’t help but relish in ‘those lovely noises of yours’.

With a final flick of his tongue, Husk drew you to the edge, your body arching in response. "That's it, baby" he whispered, his voice low and seductive, yet still comforting. "Let go for me, let me see you shine."

In that moment, you surrendered to the sensations coursing through you, your body trembling and your last scream of pleasure echoing in the room. Husk watched as you reached your peak, his heart swelling with pride…

As you begin to come down from your high but not quite over it yet, Husk couldn't help but marvel at the beautiful state your real ease had caused. His heart continued to race as he regained steady breathing after momentarily being out of air while devouring you, he couldn’t help but want to experience it again. Softly, he lifted your legs and placed them on his shoulders, giving himself better access to your glistening hole and folds.

“Wait, husk I-“ you begin after realizing the change in position but you were promptly cut off as husk begin to lap at your essence directly from the source.

"You deserve this, my love," he whispered, his voice hoarse with lust. "I want to make you feel good, as much as you've made me feel supported."

With renewed vigor, Husk dove in once more, his tongue tracing familiar paths and exploring new ones. Your breath jiggered, and your back arched as he took you on another sensual journey that started in overstimulation. His grip on your thighs tightened, his fingers digging into your skin, taking full control—you couldn’t run even if you want to.

He aims directly at your weak spot, and way he was sucking at your clit was just driving you absolutely mad. You gripped at his head, still unsure if you wanted to pull him away or bring him closer. He was precise and targeting but there was some hungry sloppiness to his technique.

As your second climax approached, Husk could feel your body tense, and he knew that he was about to witness something truly beautiful once more. Your cries of pleasure grew louder, and just as promised, the way your body convulsed and your face contorted was marvellous, what was not expected but still welcome was the fact that you had squirted, causing your arousal to coat his face and chest.

His eyes widened in awe, and he couldn't help but smirk at the sight. "Damn, you're something else." he said, his voice filled with want but also a little teasing tone to it.

Even as you settled back onto the bed flat, Husk couldn't shake off the image of squirting. His eyes locked on your glistening skin, and he knew that he wanted to see it again. His hand travel to your face, thumb brushing lips sensually, a longing look in his eyes "One more, my love," he whispered, his voice filled with determination. "I want to taste you again and see that beauty of yours unfold once more."

With a hunger that rivalled the one he had when bringing you to your first two climaxes, Husk dove in for the third time, his tongue seeking out your sensitive spots.

He craved the taste of your essence, the sound of your cries, and the sight of your strong release. You soon begin to trembled beneath him, quicker than previously but it was understandable, two orgasm in a row was about to make extra sensitive.

“Ah, fuck, Husk, it's too much!” You cried out in overstimulation.

“Shh, it's okay, baby, I know you can handle it,” he reassured, softly stroking the underside of your right thigh to offer comfort before getting his strong grip back on it.

As Husk continued to stimulate you, drawing you closer to nirvana, you found yourself liberated from all worries. In that moment, there was nowhere else you'd rather be.

As your third orgasm of the night peaked, you let out a final cry, your body convulsing with overwhelming euphoria. Once more, you squirted, coating Husk's face with your essence. This time, however, he caught most of your fluid in his moth and swallowed them, and the drops that didn’t make, he licked them off of you, his eyes close for an instances as he savoured your liquid arousal, then his eyes locked back on you.

"Oh, Husk," you breathed, your voice ragged with pleasure and emotion. "That was incredible."

He wiped the remaining droplets from his face with a satisfied grin and licked at it to make sure he gotten everything, his eyes never leaving yours. "I'm glad you enjoyed it," he said, his voice filled with love and satisfaction.

As you lay there, breathless and spent, Husk pulled you into his arms, his heart beating in his chest. Regaining back some of your sense, this scenery confused you a bit:

“What about you?” You inquired as he had yet to get release himself.

“Honestly the emotions and the time I spent between those sexy thighs of yours got me to tired to want anything more than to cuddle you right now.” he admired with a tired smile, which made giggle.

Your bodies still entwined, Husk leaned in and pressed his lips gently against yours. The kiss was soft, filled with love and appreciation, and it left you both feeling even more connected than before. Right here and there, you knew that despite the challenges you faced further down the road, you were in this together.

Slowly, Husk wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer to his chest. The warmth of his embrace enveloped you, and you felt safe and loved in his arms. "Thank you, Y/N," he whispered, his breath warm against your skin. "The cuddling, reassuring words, and this; they really help me calm down and feel better. I know I can rely on you when you do these things, and I strongly hope you can on me."

You nestled your head against his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. "Of course I do, and don’t forget—I'll always be here for you, Husk," you promised, your voice filled with reassurance. "No matter what comes our way, I'll have your back, just like you do for me."

As the two cuddled and basking in the afterglow of your shared euphoria, you knew that your bond had grown stronger. Nothing could bother the two of you right now—except perhaps the fact that you would have to get up to bathe and change the sheets soon, but that was a problem for the ‘30 minutes to one hour future yous.’

Thanks anons for requesting!

©tswhiisfttedr. dn translate, or plagiarize.

Tip Me (Ko-Fi) & And support my art account @maviscarlettie

You can now commission me!

Likes & Reblogs help!!! (Request Are On Pause)

#tswhiisftteedr #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin husk #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel husk #husk x reader #husk hazbin hotel #husk smut #husk x you #husk x y/n

174 notes · View notes

boldlyvoid · 5 months

Text

Come Together

18+ Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader

Summary: Ever since the academy, Aaron and Y/N have been at each other's throats for a spot on the BAU. He got it, She didn't. Now they have to plan the Bureau's Holiday party together without killing each other.

Warnings: angst, fighting, mutual pining, enemies to lovers, Aaron had a crush on her while married. why he and haley broke up, miscarriage mentions, divorced Aaron, flirting, teasing, kissing, fingering, hate sex, p in v smut, rough sex, no condoms used

Word Count: 4.8k

Penelope is usually the one to plan holiday parties… but after last year's spiked punch— that ruined a lot of upper agents' sobriety, which wasn’t her fault at all, the director delegated to having two random people plan it together. He pulled names from a hat that just happened to be Aaron Hotchner and Y/N Y/L/N.

She was happy to do it, and he was fine with doing it… they just weren’t happy about doing it together. The two agents couldn’t stand each other and it goes all the way back to being in the same year at the academy.

They were tied for the top of the class, duking it out to be the chosen one for Agent Rossi’s new right-hand man. And of course, it went to a man. It didn’t matter to them that she was fantastic at what she did, or that her final score was 0.2% higher than his. He was a man so he got it.

She got a job in CARD which, she liked, it was still an opportunity to solve cases and bring kids home to their parents… she just had to work with the BAU more than she liked and take orders from them. And then Rossi left, Gideon stepped down and Aaron Hotchner was the fucking Head of the BAU.

She was taking orders from him. Him and his goon squad of pretty people he picked over her.

She would’ve pushed everything aside and dealt with him, she would’ve mended things if he accepted her into the team. But he never did. After 5 applications and being looked over for everything while he hired younger and younger, she finally gave up and started to hate his guts even more.

Now she’s in the elevator, pushing the button for floor 6 and shaking the thoughts of strangling him out of her head so she can deal with him for half an hour. He’s always so busy that she’s been waiting all week just to talk about this stupid fucking party, and the only time he has is at 8:30 pm on a Friday when she should be at home.

She walks right into the bullpen, up the stairs and knocks on his door. “come in?” He calls.

“Hey,” she says with a deep sigh. “Can we talk about the party?”

“Mhm,” he nods, waving her in. “Come sit, I already have some ideas.”

“Okay…” she sits down in front of him, ignoring all his plaques and accolades and staring down at her clipboard. “I called around and there are 3 places available that are big enough to hold us, on the 3rd Saturday of the month.”

“Awesome, I already called a friend of mine with a Christmas tree farm and acquired 3 trees— Douglas furs, all pretty and big, we’ll just need a ceiling over 12 feet to house them,” he explains.

“And who’s going to decorate them?” She asks.

He shrugs, “We’ve got a big budget, we can hire someone to do it.”

“Who did Penelope use?”

“Herself,” he smiles that devilishly condescending smile. “I’m sure if we ask she’d want to help out again. She loves Christmas.”

“Did you ever figure out who spiked the punch last year?” She asks, genuinely feeling sorry for Penelope.

Penny was the only one on the team that she actually liked.

He nods, “Dax Cooper up in counter-terrorism.”

“Yeah, he’s an asshole.”

“Worse than me?” He teases. “Seriously, when are you going to stop being mad at me?”

“When you admit you hate me!” She fights back. “I did nothing to you. You’re the one who conspired with Dave and got hired here and then you purposely lost all my applications and never let me know why you wouldn’t even interview me.”

“I didn’t lose them, I put them to the side,” he shrugs. “You weren’t ready to be on our team.”

“But the walking calculator and teen Mrs. USA are?” She laughs.

“Reid and JJ are wonderful assets,” he snaps, jaw tight and eyes full of fury. “This is why I don’t want you. You wouldn’t be a team player. Not until you get rid of the attitude and accept that this job is about more than numbers. Yes, they’re young, yes you beat me by a fraction of a percent, but that doesn’t mean you have what it takes to do what we do.”

“I look at cases full of missing, dead and raped kids all day, how is that any different?” She honestly can’t believe it.

“Because you look at a screen all day with facts and witness statements and I go out into the field and I talk to parents and I deal with the cops and I don’t start fights over petty bullshit,” he reminds her. “I have never called you names or signalled you out. All you do, every time we're on a scene together, is whisper and gossip and try to undermine me. You need to grow up.”

She just shakes her head, holding in a comment that could hurt him because… and she hates to say it, but he’s right. “Whatever. Should I call one of these places and book it tomorrow or what?”

“Do whatever you want, just give me the address so I can have the trees and decorations sent over,” he honestly doesn’t care. “I trust your judgement on a caterer, I’ll pick a band… what else would we need?”

“Invitations, which I can handle,” she assures as she stands up to walk to his door. “I’ll cc you on everything and include the director for oversight. I’ll call you if I have questions.”

“Y/N,” he calls out to her before she leaves. “I’m going to be looking for a new agent in a few months…”

“And?”

“If we can work this out by then… maybe things will be different when you apply this time?” He suggests, giving her innocent eyes and genuinely meaning it.

“Okay.”

—

“Did you see her last night?” Dave asks, walking right into Aaron's office with two coffees right at 8am.

He nods, “I did… you don’t have any connections to a band I can book for Christmas, do you?”

“The Jazz club might be able to lend us some members,” he suggests. “I’ll make a call… but I take it things went well?”

“As well as they could go, she’s still so mad at me for getting this position over her,” he shakes his head. “I don’t know how to make her realize she just wasn’t ready. Our working together would’ve been awful. It would’ve—

“Ruined your marriage that just ended?” Dave teases. “I know you liked her, I saw the way you two looked at each other and I saw the teasing and the way you talked about her. She was more than a friend to you… I couldn’t have her on the team like that. I couldn’t see you go through what I did with Caroline.”

“I hate thinking about how different things could’ve been if she was on the team though,” he shakes his head and stares off out the window. “We almost broke up back then, you know? We almost never had Jack…”

“You know it’s perfectly normal for marriages not to work out, it doesn’t mean you loved her any less, it just wasn’t meant to be forever,” Dave reminds him. “You’re still friends, there’s no ill will. You never cheated, she didn’t either. You just grew apart. It happens.”

“But now I’m single and I can pursue Y/N… but she hates me,” he sighs. “I don’t think she’ll ever stop hating me.”

“Nasty hate sex is fun,” Dave teases, making them both laugh. “I’m serious… you wouldn’t believe the women I’ve—

“I know, actually,” Aaron shakes his head. “Strauss can’t look at you the same anymore.”

“Hey… that wasn’t hate, it was just indifference,” he teases.

“Whatever,” Aaron can’t help but smirk. “Can you work on the band for me?”

“I will, I’ll get them to throw in some love songs too,” Dave teases on his way out.

This was going to be interesting.

—

Two weeks of planning and emails blow by in the blink of an eye.

He gets ready for the party early, having to be there to check things over and meet the band and shake hands with the higher-ups as they arrive. He has a nice suit on, a red tie for Christmas and dark green socks that no one will ever notice. But he wants to look nice.

For her.

He walks up to her where she’s hiding in the corner. Adorning the most stunning golden dress and holding her clipboard, making sure everything gets delivered and set up in time for the start time at 7. They still have 4 hours till then, but she’s an overachiever. And a worrier. She needed this to be perfect.

She looked perfect. Like the 2000 Holiday Barbie brought to life. He’s absolutely astounded by her beauty he just stares for a moment before he says anything.

“You know, you look very pretty today,” he compliments but she doesn’t take it that way.

She looks at him like he just insulted her mother. “What?”

“That dress, it looks nice on you,” he looks her up and down. Smiling like he has some tricks up his sleeve. “What? Can’t I think you look nice? Haven’t we spent enough time talking this last month to let me compliment you?”

“Don’t you have a wife?” She asks, disgusted he’d hit on her. “And a kid?”

“We got divorced back in April,” he shrugs. “And you say you want to be a profiler, yet you haven’t looked at my hands in months?”

She looks now, noticing that he doesn’t have a ring and the tan line that should be there is long gone, which means he’s telling the truth. “Oh… sorry.”

“It’s better this way,” he nods, giving her a sweet smile. “Is everything going to plan?”

She nods too, “Yeah. Just waiting on your band… please tell me they’re good?”

He laughs, “They’re great. Dave’s got this Jazz bar he basically owns with how much money he’s spent there so they owe him one… You’ll like them.”

“Jazz, at Christmas?” She can’t believe it. “Hotch—

“Aaron,” he corrects her. “Please, for the love of god, call me Aaron again.”

“Why?” She laughs, “We’re not close.”

“Oh, come on,” he teases. “You can’t tell me that before everything went down, we didn’t have something going on? We were friendly, I almost thought you had a crush on me?”

She looks at him with a brow raised, “You thought I had a crush on you?”

He nods, “And then you found out I was married.”

“So you’re saying if you weren’t married we could’ve hooked up at the academy?” She asks. “Sounds like you liked me too, regardless of the wife.”

“No—

“Be honest,” she begs, stepping into his space even more. “If things were different- if you didn’t have a wife and we fucked back then, would you have screwed me over for the job?”

“I didn’t screw you over, I simply already knew Dave,” he finally admits after 10 long years. “I knew he was about to leave, he knew Gideon didn’t want to be in charge. He wanted someone to run the whole unit who wouldn’t choke— not saying you’d choke, he just knew I was already hard on the inside, I wasn’t going to lose my mind with all the shit we see.”

“You could’ve put in a good word for me, Aaron, I would’ve been fine working under you. I would’ve loved even just an office job in the BAU, I want to work with more than just missing kids,” she begs. “I’ve done it for 10 years, now. You know that makes me strong. You have a kid of your own, you know it’s not easy to think about them missing, let alone deal with it.”

“I know… and I was serious, I have a new position opening up and I want to give this another try,” he admits. “I want you on the team.”

She shakes her head, “how can I be on the team when this—” she points between them. “This, whatever this is, is going on?”

“The sexual tension?” He teases and she swats his arm. “We’ll be fine.”

She shakes her head. “Just, give me some time to think about it?”

“I can do that…”

—

She watches him from afar most of the night. Talking only when they needed to, like in front of the director or on stage while introducing the band and thanking everyone for being there… she was having a very hard time being in the same room as him with all she knew now.

She was still mad at him.

Mad because she’s wasted so much of her life hating him when they could’ve been happy together… but at the same time she was sad for his ex-wife. She wondered how long the marriage was loveless. Did she know? Did she suspect? Who broke it off? Does he see his son? She knew he was a good man back then but, what kind of good man has a crush on someone else while married? Would he just do that to her if they got together?

She had so many questions in her mind and they wouldn’t shut up.

He approaches her again while she’s deep in thought, staring at the floor while she sips on a drink she doesn’t even like.

“Having fun?” He asks.

She shakes her head, “No.” she puts her drink down on the table just behind her and turns back to him as he begins to speak.

“Something not going according to pl—

“Why the fuck did you have to tell me you like me?” She snaps. “I was so okay with hating you for the rest of my life because I couldn’t be on the team I always wanted to join and then you tell me you like me? That if you didn’t have a wife you’d want to be with me back then?”

He steps more into her space so they can keep their voices down and between each other, “because you deserve to know.”

“No, I don’t think so,” she fights back. “You were never worried about me being too immature for the team, you were scared you’d end up cheating on your wife with me. I didn’t even know you had a wife until I developed feelings for you. You never wore your ring to class, we spent every day sitting together in class or at the library and you came back to my dorm a few times… you pursued me as much as I was pursuing you and then you made it my fault.”

“I know, and I’m sorry,” he bows his head, ashamed. “My wife and I weren’t in a good place, we were talking about getting separated… then she got pregnant.”

“I thought Jack was only—

“We lost a couple babies before him,” he admits. “I didn’t want to be like my dad. I didn’t want to knock her up and leave her so I stayed. I stayed but I wasn’t a good dad anyway. I was always at work, I missed important things with my son and she was the one to end it because she deserved someone who wanted to be home with her and my son deserved to grow up knowing his dad wasn’t always going to be there but loves him enough to be as present as possible when he is home. I couldn’t be that when I was with his mom. we’re so much better apart, I love having weekends alone with my son and doing things we like and not worrying about fighting with his mother in front of him. And she’s happier now with her new boyfriend and Jack's happy with the prospect of a stepdad who can step up in all the areas I lack.”

“That’s a really mature thing to do for him,” she manages to give him a small, press-lipped smile. “Still doesn’t make me feel better about what you did to me.”

“I’ve wanted to tell you the truth and that I’m sorry for so long, but when we’re together it’s always a fight. I can never get an honest minute with you, you always just come in guns blazing and my instinct is to tease you back,” he admits. “I am sorry. I wish things were different. I would like to start over if you’d allow me to.”

“I don’t want a job on your team,” she says, stepping in even closer. Close enough to kiss him. “I can’t work with you like this.”

“Why?” He smirks.

“Because Strauss hates you enough as is without you fucking your subordinate,” she whispers. “I’m not throwing myself under the bus… just to be under you.”

He lunges for a kiss, pressing his lips against hers as he cups her face. She backs up slightly in surprise, bumping into the table behind herself. Aaron’s instincts are sharp, he reaches behind her and steadies it so the drink doesn’t crash against the floor and draw more attention to them. She knows the few people in this corner are already looking at them, but she doesn’t care.

This is a kiss she’s waited a decade for.

Her hands go inside his suit jacket, she reaches around to grasp his back and pulls him flush against herself. They break the kiss just to breathe, going in for another and another until their tongues meet and they’re the odd couple making out in the corner of the party.

His hand slips from her cheek to her jaw, along the side of her neck and then she pulls away, “not here,” she reminds him they’re in public and he can’t touch her anywhere he wants to.

“Sorry,” he apologizes. “How long do we have to stay here?”

“I have to stay for shutdown tonight,” she sighs. “But…. Come with me.”

She pats his side and moves past him, leading him out of the little corner they’re in and towards the main room. He follows her up a staircase, past people they both know and respect and they catch a few eyes but, she puts on a fake pissed-off look and they think she’s leading him somewhere to yell at him… cause that’s what they do.

“Hey man, where are you going?” Derek asks as they pass him and Penelope sharing a plate of hors d’oeuvres.

He’s quick on his feet, “One of the vendors fucked up, we have to chat with their boss and discuss how they can make it up to us.”

“Oh, damn, well… have fun,” he teases. Letting them go on down the small corridor towards some offices.

She leads him to the only open office she has access to, flicks on the light, lets him in and locks the door behind them. He’s quick to crowd her space, press her up against the door and grip her chin to tilt her attention up toward his eyes once more. She’s back inside his suit jacket, he’s so toasty-warm in there she can only imagine what it’ll be like to be naked with him.

“What were you saying about fucking up and making up for it?” She teases him.

He smirks, “I will… but first we need to find a way to release all that pent-up frustration we have against each other.”

She tries her best not to laugh, just shaking her head with a smile as she lets out a little huff, “Ah yes, fuck me like you hate me so we can restart fresh.”

He cups her face with both hands, eyes darkening with lust, “you’ve been such a brat for so long.”

“And I’m sure you know the cure for that?” She teases, pulling him in closer. One of her legs slips out of the slit of her dress and she brings it up to wrap around his hip, he’s quick to drop one of the hands from her cheek to grip her thigh.

“I do,” he whispers, his voice so deep it makes her stomach drop with anticipation.

He kisses her abruptly, she grips his back pulling him as if they could possibly get any closer but they can’t. Not yet. He grinds against her as their tongues meet again, his hand on her leg goes a little higher until he’s gripping her ass. The hand on her cheek starts to slip again, caressing her chest, she lightly moans into his mouth at the feeling. He’s everywhere, boxing her in against the door, but she wants more. She wants him buried deep inside of her, pounding her against the table over there, letting her know just how much he’s wanted her this whole time.

He kisses the side of her mouth, her jaw and down her neck, letting her catch her breath just to knock it all out of her again when he starts to lightly suck on her skin. “Aaron, don’t you fucking dare,” she scolds him.

“I won’t,” he speaks against her, just lightly nipping and sucking at her skin on his way down to her cleavage.

She pulls her hands out from inside his jacket to roam his shoulders until one hand ends up at the nape of his neck to play with his hair. Her head is tossed back against the door, and he kisses every inch of available skin on her chest.

He reaches down and gets both of his hands under her ass, making her jump up so he can carry her. Still kissing her neck, he moves them over to the table and sets her down. She’s just the tiniest bit taller now, he kisses her cheek again, looking her in the eye once more as he spreads her legs and runs his fingers along her thighs, realizing now she has nylons on. His hands go further, towards her aching cunt, he grips her thighs while both thumbs play with the seam of her nylons.

“I’m gonna rip these,” he announces, finding the weakest part of the seam and tearing it open enough to fit his cock through, without completely ruining them. He moves her thong to the side and drags his index finger over her clit. “You’re fucking soaked…”

She tosses her head back, both hands gripping the table like her ice depends on it when two of his fingers plunge into her. “Oh, fuck,” she moans a little too loud.

Attaching his lips to her neck again, he sucks on her pulse point while fucking her on his fingers. It’s hard and quick, covering the palm of his hand with her slick as his thumb rubs her clit. She’s always known his hands would be good for this, if nothing else.

“Please, Aaron? Oh my god,” She starts to beg.

“Words, princess,” he teases against her neck, teeth grazing her skin, his breath hot, it sends a shiver down her spine.

“Wanna cum,” she whispers, breathy and so close. “On your cock.”

“Okay,” he pulls out, bringing his hand to his mouth and licking his palm up to his fingers. He sucks them into his mouth with a groan. His cock twitches between them, jumping with excitement.

She whines again while he undoes the zipper and tugs his cock out, “please?”

“Hold on,” he spreads the excess wetness over his cock, stroking himself twice while biting his tongue. It clearly felt so fucking good but she knew her tight cunt was going to be better.

He slips in slowly and her grip changes, letting go of the counter, she wraps her legs around him and grips his back with her fingernails dug into the skin. “Better?” He whispers into her ear.

She whimpers when he doesn’t move, feeling so full, “fuck me, please? Fuck me the way I deserve.”

He hums, kissing her cheek before looking into her eyes, all watery and blown out, her mascara started to run a bit. He tilts his head to the side, “how hard?”

“Hard,” she looks him dead in the face.

He slips out, pulls her off the table and turns her around so her chest is against the cold hardwood table-top and flips her dress skirt up and out of the way. He rips her nylons even more, all the way up the back so her ass is exposed. He takes her ass cheeks in his hands and spreads her apart, amazed at how her pussy clenched in anticipation.

“Please,” she whined, almost stomping her feet with desperation.

He slams into her without warning, making her gasp loud enough to be heard by anyone wandering the hallway outside.

He pulls out a bit and slams back into her again and again and again until the noises she’s making are complete nonsense. She whines and moans and leans against the table for dear life while pushing back against him. He slaps her ass a few times, making the sound reverberate around the room like an echo.

He needs more friction, so his thrusts get less powerful and more rhythmic, he uses her like a toy bouncing her on his cock like a rag doll. She felt like her main purpose in life was to be fucked by him like this, it felt so good, it felt incredibly right, and she loved every fucking second of it. All those years of fighting paid the fuck off.

He slams into her cervix over and over, the head of his cock kissing the puckered spot inside again and again. Her hungry cunt sucks him in so deep, never wanting him to leave, and he can tell she’s close just from the way she clamps around him like a vice. He reached around to her stomach and drags his hand down her mound to rub her clit with his middle finger. The rhythm barely matches, but she loves the way it feels. It’s unpredictable, it’s all under his control, she just sits there and takes it like the good girl he’s raised her to be.

“Cum on the cock you hate so much,” he insists, “I wanna feel it. I want you to cover my cock in your cum before I fill you up to the fucking brim.”

Too fucked out to really respond she reaches one hand behind her back so he’ll hold it. He intertwines their fingers and leans forward to kiss her shoulder as his hips snap against hers with force. She starts to shake, her legs barely able to keep her up as her orgasm hits her and rattles through her body. He feels the spasm from the inside, her cunt flutters as she releases all the built-up tension in her body She’s so fucking tight he’s barely able to register his own orgasm approaching when he topples over her on the table.

He fucks into her as deep as he can go and then stills. She can feel rope after rope of his cum pump into her, they can hear the dribbles on the floor between them as it overflows and drips out of her, along with her own.

He kisses her back, breathing hard against her. She’s just trapped there under him, legs quaking in her heels, “holy fuck?”

“Sorry,” he pulls back and out of her, “shit… we didn’t think this through.”

She sighs, holding her dress up so she doesn’t make a mess. “Are there any tissues in here?”

He looks around, “Yeah… but it’s just that brown paper towel roll like we have at work.”

“It’ll do,” she shrugs. Watching him walk over to the dispenser near the sink in the corner of the room, he takes a bit out and cleans himself up quickly, putting himself back in his boxers before her gets some more.

He leans her forward again, kneeling behind her, he cleans her up to the best of his ability and then he repositions her thong. He even wipes up the floor before tossing the paper out. “I can’t believe there was so much…”

She laughs, dropping her dress back down and fluffing it so it looks normal again. “10 years worth of—

“Okay,” he shakes his head with a smirk, stepping back into her space, he wraps her up and kisses her forehead, “you did so good.”

“Thank you,” she smiles sweetly, she feels so different. There’s so much affection in her chest as she looks up at him once more. “I’m glad we got that out of the way.”

“I’ll stay with you here while they’re cleaning up,” he assures. “And maybe later I can show you how sorry I am for keeping secrets all these years?”

“I’d really like that… but I’m still not working for you,” she teases.

“I guess I’ll just have to take on more CARD cases so you’re forced to see me,” he teases right back, smiling at her.

This is going to be fun.

General Taglist

@ncsls0515 @stevesmunsons @reidsbookclub @sweetyyhippyy @manuosorioh @mrs-dr-reid @k-k0129 @squishyturtle @katsukis1wife @buckleyhans @mrs-ssa-hotch @ssavanessa22

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch x you #hotch smut #hotch x reader #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine

266 notes · View notes

bitchesgetriches · 2 years

Photo

Getting a job:

How to Write a Resume so You Actually Have a Prayer of Getting Hired

How to Write a Cover Letter like You Actually Want the Job

Ask the Bitches: What the Hell Else Can I Do to Get a Job?

How to Frame Volunteering on Your Resume When You’ve Never Had a Job

How To Get Ready For a Job Interview: Prep Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

Common Job Interview Questions and How to Answer Them with the Confidence of a Mediocre White Dude

10 Questions You Should Never Be Asked in a Job Interview

What to Wear (and What Not to Wear) to a Job Interview

What to Do When You’re Asked About Your Salary Requirements in a Job Interview

How NOT to Determine Your Salary

How to Find Remote Work: On Getting the Elusive Work-From-Home Job

High School Students Have No Way of Knowing What Career to Choose. Why Do We Make Them Do It Anyway?

The Actually Helpful, Nuanced, Non-Bullshit Way to Choose a Future Career

Myers-Briggs Personalities and Income: What Your Type Says About Your Salary

I Just Applied for a Job. How (And When) Should I Follow Up?

Our Best Secrets for a Successful, Strategic, and SHORT Job Search

Season 2, Episode 11: “I Tripped and Fell into a Career I Don’t like. How Do I Reinvent Myself?”

Freelancing and side jobs:

Should Artists Ever Work for Free?

Stop Undervaluing Your Freelance Work, You Darling Fool

Romanticizing the Side Hustle: When 1 Job Isn’t Enough

The Ugly Truth About Unpaid Internships

Freelancer, Protect Thyself… With a Fair Contract

Ask the Bitches: My Boss Won’t Give Me a Contract and I’m Freaking Out

I Lost My Job and It Might Be the Best Worst Thing That’s Ever Happened to Me

Becoming a Millennial Entrepreneur (in the Midst of a Pandemic) with Katelyn Magnuson

11 Awful Mistakes I Made as a Self-Employed Freelancer, and How YOU Can Avoid Them

Workplace benefits:

Workplace Benefits and Other Cool Side Effects of Employment

Your School or Workplace Benefits Might Include Cool Free Stuff

Your Yearly Free Medical Care Checklist

Dafuq Is a Retirement Plan and Why Do You Need One?

How to Save for Retirement When You Make Less Than $30,000 a Year

Season 2, Episode 6: “Someone Offered to Mentor Me! How Do I Be a Non-Sucky Mentee?”

Navigating the workplace:

My Secret Weapon for Preparing for Awkward Boss Confrontations

Are You Working on the Next Fyre Festival?: Identifying a Toxic Workplace

Woke at Work: How to Inject Your Values into Your Boring, Lame-Ass Job

Can Looking Weird at Work Be Good for Your Career?

Why Is Short Hair Controversial? An Examination of Expensive, Annoying Beauty Standards

Season 1, Episode 1: “Should I Tell My Boss I’m Looking for Another Job?”

You WILL Regret Accepting Your Coworker’s Social Media Friend Request

Season 1, Episode 5: “I Don’t Love My Job, but It Pays Well. Should I Quit—or Tough It Out?”

Season 2, Episode 7: “How Do I Throw My Incompetent Coworkers under the Bus?”

Sexual Harassment: How to Identify and Fight It in the Workplace

Getting a raise:

Salary Range: Are You Asking for Enough?

A Millennial’s Guide to Growing Your Salary

The First Time I Asked for a Raise

You Need to Ask for a Fucking Raise

Should You Increase Your Salary or Decrease Your Spending?

Getting a promotion:

Santa Isn’t Coming and Neither Is Your Promotion: How To Get Promoted

How I Chessmastered Myself Into a Promotion at Work

Job Hopping vs. Career Loyalty by the Numbers

The Fascinating Results of Our Job Hopping vs. Career Loyalty Poll

I Hate My Job and I Don’t Know How To Leave It: A Confession

A New Job, a New Day, a New Life, and I’m Feeling Good

Season 1, Episode 9: “I’ve Given up on My Dream Career. Where Do I Go From Here?”

Working remotely

How to Successfully Work from Home Without Losing Your Goddamn Mind (Or Your Job)

How to Find Remote Work: On Getting the Elusive Work-From-Home Job

8 Genres of Productivity Music (Plus Our Secret Stash of Personal Favorites)

My 25 Secrets to Successfully Working from Home with ADHD

#resume #cover letter #job search #job hunt #getting a job #get a job #career advice #job search advice #job #freelancing

2K notes · View notes

inkskinned · 1 year

Text

everyone talks about the clothing store and honestly everyone is expected to wear stuff from that store and you're a little young and curious, and what's the harm of looking. it's in all the magazines and everyone knows okay some of the things are ugly but! like generally everyone thinks we should be wearing these clothes. they're elite. they're precious. they are a symbol of wealth and status.

you walk into the clothing store and see a very nice sweater and you've been wanting to stay warm so you pick up the sweater. it turns immediately into a horrible fizzing froth, rushing over your skin, faintly acidic. it's tacky, it leaves behind a residue. horrified and a little ashamed - did you do it wrong? - you reach out blindly and your hands find a shirt. that one dissolves too. you think of the phrase you break it, you bought it. how much money did you just accidentally spend on that shirt and that sweater, both things that you'll never be able to wear.

more confused than anything, you turn to the first person you see, but she's experiencing the same thing, her brows furrowed. "i've been here since i was 13," she says. "one of these days i'll actually get to try on something."

you were raised with horror movies, so you look for an escape instead of trying to stay. you go to the front desk and wait in the front line and when you finally get to the front, a very angry man is sitting there, scowling at you. "i think your store is broken," you say to him. "i can't pick up any of your clothes. they don't work."

it is as if you have said something vile. every person within earshot takes a step back from you. the man gives you a cool look. "these clothes are good for you," he says.

"no, i know that," you've read about them, "but i can't seem to actually hold them."

again, everyone seems to think you've said the wrong thing. some of them are holding shirts, so obviously some clothes work. those are the people you hear whispering first. lazy. someone murmurs. i managed fine, you hear. i just had to keep trying.

the man taps a sign next to him. in big bold print: not everyone can have this.

"okay, um. if you're not going to be helpful, i'm just going to... not buy this," you manage, feeling yourself flush with heat. why are you so embarrassed? their clothes are the thing that aren't working.

"i don't have time for people who don't dress themselves well," he says. "it's disgusting."

you don't know what else to say because actually you dress fine, you're pretty sure, you're just not in their clothes. you leave the store.

but your hands are still tacky from before. you find yourself weirdly sensitive about your clothes. maybe you should go back in, try again? there were people who were able to make the clothes stay present, you might have just been doing something weird.

plus there's the rest of the world. how people look at you in airports. how shame rushes over your cheeks during job interviews, worried you don't look "professional" enough. the people across you are all wearing those clothes, and you're not. in the doctor's office, the nurse's eyebrows skyrocket. are you sure you actually went into the store and tried on the clothes? you're staring at her - i'm here to see about my cough, not about my wardrobe.

but of course it fucking matters. when you google it, you find out that most people can only hold onto the clothes for about two years or so, and then they fizzle out too. that the clothes only "stick" for 5% of customers. it just means that any person in those clothes matters more. it's a scarcity. at first, you're horrified by the idea of something that almost never works. but you learn it soon enough: being in the 5% means you have taste, class, are exceptionally pretty.

you try to ask why exactly it's these clothes, but you usually are answered with an eye roll. you ask why the prices are so high. why nobody seems to care about the way their clothes leave that weird strange residue for years later. there's a sizing chart online you find, hoping it might explain your weird inability to lift anything. most of the news articles all read the same thing - this chart was made by someone cruel and definitely isn't accurate, but for some reason it is still used as our golden rule.

so you go again. you fall too. it's worth it to try. even kind of ironically. even kind of privately, shamefully. this time you go and manage to hold onto socks, but it means you sometimes get that strange residue on your floors. you get used to the tackiness after a while, but when you manage to hold onto pants, you discover the tackiness spreads. sure, it's irritating - this sense there's a barrier between everything you touch, even you and your friends - but it's worth it, because people notice you're in those pants. and you don't want to be one of the 95% who lose them after all this fucking work you put in, so you let the tack get all over everything until it dries down into a fine powder that coats your floor in a brick red flurry. when you walk, your footprints look bloody, so you just learn to step gently.

and since it worked for you once, like gambling - you will come back. you will teach others how to get into the store. you will tell your own children - oh, you just have to keep trying at the clothing store. you will let others treat you badly when you are not wearing the right things. you will spend all that money over and over and over again and you will feel ugly if you are not wearing their brand. you are simply treated better if you dress like this. you feel better if you dress like this, secretly winning over your friends who are between sizes. it doesn't matter how much time you spend at the store, missing birthday cakes and parties because you're trying to make a dress look nice before dissolving. what matters is that when it works, all that relief and joy and peace rushes in. when it works, people finally love you again.

the diet industry promises you - it'll all be okay, once you're thin.

#this whole thing is about the diet industry #i hope that's clear #it REALLY bothers me that people are okay with an industry only having a 5% ''success'' rate #like .....#imagine if cars only started 5% of the time #it's almost like.... dieting... doesn't actually help people with systematic inequality #and the multiple facets of why eating is a deeply personal experience....#and the system of shame and fatphobia is not going to fucking help anything......#can't wait for someone to be like ''.... but there's an epidemic....''#i'm about to be ur ending little man <3

1K notes · View notes

strayseraphine · 1 month

Text

choice | one shot

pairing: bang chan x fem!reader

summary: The opportunity to work in the same place as your childhood best friend is a great, right? Unfortunately, it turns out that it's hard to control the emotions that have been swirling in your hearts for years when you're at arm's length. fluff, a little bit of angst, jealousy, friends to lovers, cheesy fic with our silly cute channie

The kdrama mentioned is called Tomorrow and the fic mentions about episode 5, you have been warned. Here is the song from the episode that also appears in the fic.

TW: menfions of suicide, death, depression

5 204 words

the one shot is also avaliable on ao3

bang chan masterlist | general masterlist | stranger things masterlist

Holding the handle of your suitcase tightly, you felt like a child lost in a crowd. You were breathless, and instead of slowing down, your breathing sped up and became more and more erratic.

What on earth tempted you to leave your entire life so far and fly to the other end of the world?

Then, as if on a call, a reason appeared in front of your eyes.

Despite the cap and mask covering his face, you immediately recognized him. However, not wanting to draw attention to you, you came closer and in silence went to the car, where immediately after closing the door you felt strong arms tighten around you.

"I missed you so much!" he muttered, snuggling into your neck.

"I missed you too, Channie." you laughed as you reciprocated the hug, smelling his perfume, which he had been using since you can remember. You didn't know it was possible to miss a scent that much.

"I can't believe I'm going to work with my best friend!" he said.

"First of all, you're lucky the boys can't hear it, secondly we won't."

"What do you mean we won't?"

"I, unlike you, will be locked in the office."

"But we will be in the same building! We will be able to spend our breaks together, I can bring you coffee and snacks!" he said excitedly with a wide smile on his face and squeezed your hand. You didn't complain about the fact that he didn't let go of you until the car pulled up to your new temporary home.

Two months ago, Chan called you saying that at JYP they were looking for someone for a temporary translator position. Since you were fresh out of college in the process of looking for a job, he thought you should definitely apply. Thinking little, you submitted your application.

Three weeks later, you received an invitation to an online interview, which resulted in a successful outcome and a contract signed for six months.

The experience you were able to gain working for this company was extremely valuable, but you were ashamed to admit that your main motivation for coming here was Chris. As children, the two of you were inseparable, but when he left Australia to chase his dreams both of you stubbornly made sure that contact did not disappear. When he came home on vacation you spent most of your free time together feeling as if he had never left.

Somewhere between playing together in the sandbox, sneaking out of the house for the late-night walks you used to go for when he returned to Australia during his teenage years and skipping lectures at uni just so you could spend the day and then the night with him, a strong bond formed between you.

In it there was something else to be found.

Something you both tried to ignore and push away.

Something that you were killing in each other thinking it was one-sided.

Something that you tried to keep in an iron, indestructible cage deep in your hearts.

Something that shattered the bars every time you saw each other.

The weeks at work were passing awfully fast. Your new co-workers welcomed you very warmly, meetings with Chris became your daily routine, and you felt more and more comfortable here every day. Keeping the promise, you spent all your lunch breaks together, sometimes joined by other members of the group. You quickly became part of the meetings. You even accompanied them during dance rehearsals and studio recordings. Especially Chan. Sitting with him in the studio until the morning hours and greeting sunrises together became almost a habit.

Today, however, you had the day off, while Chris had a full day of rehearsal for the gala to be held in a week's time. A strange feeling of emptiness and longing accompanied you throughout the day. You weren't afraid to admit that you were already used to his daily presence. However, you were afraid to think what will happen when you have to go back to Australia.

In order to focus your thoughts on something else after lunch you turned into a couch potato and started watching kdrama. Completely losing all sense of reality, you fully gave yourself over to the stories of the characters, which moved you to tears. You were snapped out of your trance by a phone call.

"Hello?" you said in a broken voice, not even trying to hide that you were crying. Unfortunately, the other side of the phone remained quiet and quickly hung up. Not caring much you wanted to go back to watching, but moments later Chan barged into your apartment without even bothering to knock on the door.

"Chris? what are you doing here?" you asked surprised still sobbing.

"What happened?" He asked. The sight of your heartbroken voice on the phone made his heart freeze.

"What?"

"We finished training, so I figured you were probably still awake and in the mood for something to eat, I called and heard you crying. What happened?" he explained quickly with a worried expression on his face.

"Oh god… Nothing happened! It just- It was just so damn beautifull and sad!" you laughed through your tears.

"Were you watching drama again?" he just sighed feeling small relief.

"Of course I was!"

"You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"I am sorry!" you threw a pillow in his diercion.

"Okay, okay, what was it about?" he shook his head, sitting down next to you.

"She died in a car accident, and he was someone who had to deal with a lot of deaths of his loved ones, his whole life, everyone blamed him for it! and he did nothing wrong!" you felt like your throat was shrinking. "His father blamed him for his mother's death because she died while giving birth, then when his wife died, her father also blamed him and he was in such a dark place, he wanted to kill himself, he believed them, that it was his fault!" you were ranting about character history, and he was just looking at you with a smile on his lips.

Despite the fact that your eyes were swollen and red from crying, he found something somehow adorable. Something pure. Something that made him want to hide you in his arms and kiss the tears off your cheeks. However, he quickly had to chase these thoughts away. After all, he was incapable of falling in love, wasn't he?

"And they show love in such a beautiful way here! Maybe I don't agree with "you are my whole life attitude" but in other aspects? They compare human beings to a tree, you know? People are like trees, And what matters is who makes the flowers bloom on the tree, which means your life can change depending on who you meet. At that moment she proposes to him, saying she wants to be the one to make the flowers on his tree bloom."

"A beautiful metaphor." he replied.

"Right? Later they present the red thread theory, which says that they are connected to each other and will find each other in each incarnation, which gives such a strange sense of hope! But I still think love is more of a choice than a destiny, which seems much stronger, because if I heard from someone now that I'm their whole world and their life doesn't exist without me I don't know if I'd be scared."

"How is it that you're one of the most romantic people I know, and you're afraid of such great confessions of love?" he asked.

"Imagine being in a relationship with a very toxic person, and when you want to get away from them they start threatening to kill themselves because they can't live without you. People in moments of desperation are able to go as far as anything, and love, despite the fact that it is very beautiful, can make a person very stupid." you explained.

"You are right."

"I am lucky enough to have some people who genuinely want the flowers on my tree bloom." you smiled. "You are one of them, by the way." you leaned your head on his shoulder.

"Yeah, you also take very good care of my tree." he replied without thinking. "Not only mine." he added quickly with a grunt. He began thinking about how other people feel in your company. About how there is always brightness and warmth in the room along with you. About how in his life the dark void was decorated with shining stars creating a beautiful night sky thanks to you.

"Who do you think your red thread is connected to?" you asked suddenly after a moment of silence.

"Mine?" he asked puzzled. Certainly not with the person I would like to. He thought. "Mine has probably been broken."

"I don't think so, in the show they said it only breaks at the moment of suicide. You are still here Chan, your thread surely leads to someone wonderful, as you deserve." You patted him on the knee. "Oh! there was also a very beautiful song in this episode, wanna hear?"

"Sure." He replied quietly and watched you get up from the couch to your laptop. He watched your every move, hoping to spot at least the thinnest red thread between the two of you.

"Can you focus?" Lee Know asked rolling his eyes.

"Earth to kangaroo! Where are you Chan?" added Han waving his hand in front of his face.

"I am focused, I don't know what you mean." he replied trying to defend himself.

"We have been practicing the same routine for an hour, and you are messing up the steps as if you were dancing it for the first time. " Minho squinted his eyes.

"Come on, give him a break, he is in looove." laughed Hyunjin.

"I am not!"

"We can see that there is something between the two of you, we can see how you look at her, you can't fool us, you do not look at a friend like that."

"I am not in love with y/n!" he said loudly, but without conviction. Saying those words caused him pain. Somehow saying that he doesn't love you felt wrong.

"But you know…none of us said her name out loud." said Changbin more peacefully.

"But-" Chan sighed and resignedly hid his face in his hands. For years he had pushed his feelings aside, but now that you were so close and had become an integral part of his life it was too difficult.

"Why you never let me bring her brownies that I made?" Felix laughed.

"Why do you always smile like an idiot when she sends you a photo?" I.N added.

"Let's just go back to the practice." He cut off the subject, knowing that the guys were right. Nevertheless, he knew that the moment he admitted it, nothing would be the same again, and changes can be scary.

In every job, no matter how wonderful, there are hard times. Today, some of your co-workers decided to take out their bad mood and frustration over non-functioning equipment on the team you were on. Although you knew that their bad mood was caused by the work reorganization, some unpleasant comments and remarks were particularly memorable and ruined your mood.

Due to a system failure that prevented you from working, you were told to go home before lunch, so you were not surprised to hear the sound of the phone at the hour when you usually meet.

"Where are you?" asked Chan.

"There was a system malfunction and they let us go home."

"So you won't be joining us?"

"What? Why?" Felix's voice came from the background. "But I made brownies! I brought them for you!" he took Chan's phone closer.

"Give me the phone, Felix!"

There was a commotion on the other side of the phone. You could imagine Felix running away with the phone and the guys helping him keep the leader at bay.

"Hey y/n!"

"Hey Seungmin, what's up?"

"Bang Chan misses you!" you could hear the smile in his voice.

"Tell him I miss him too," you chuckled.

"Okay, that's enough!" judging by Seungmin's mumbling and laughing, you concluded that the phone had returned to its owner.

"Talk to you later, bye!" he hung up before you had time to answer anything.

Since you had more time today, you decided to use it for cleaning, which always helped you to calm down to some extent, losing yourself in it and in the music from the speaker, you didn't know when a few hours had passed. Satisfied with your clean surroundings, you sat down on the couch, but after a while you felt a wave of fatigue hit you. With nothing better to do, you covered yourself with a blanket and fell asleep.

Unfortunately, this time the nap did not help your mood, and the sound of a knock on the door that woke you up made you even more upset. Covered with a blanket, you moved slowly toward the door. Then, as if by magic, when you saw Chan in the doorway, all your anger vanished and was replaced by…relief?

With a mournful whimper, you let your emotions carry you and without asking, you hugged him, cuddling into his chest. Surprised at first, he made no move, but he quickly woke up and you felt him embrace you. The familiar scent of his perfume created a sense of security in your mind that made every negative feeling inside you want to find an escape. Your breathing became more and more shaky as you fought back the tears that came to your eyes.

"Hey, it's okay," he said, sensing your stress. "Let it out, I'm here." His large hand began to slide up and down your back, caressing you.

"You are here." you muttered while snuggling even more into his shirt. He had the feeling that his heart was now on fire, but it wasn't the heat causing unbearable pain. It was the fire that slowly burns in the fireplace on winter evenings warming the house. Home. That's how he felt in your company.

"Come, let's sit down and you'll tell me all about it." he suggested, however, you still did not want to leave his arms. Selfishly you tightened your embrace without moving from your spot. "We can cuddle on the couch, come on." he chuckled seeing your reaction. Sitting snuggled into each other, Chan connected to the speaker and played your playlist with calmer songs in the background. It took a moment before you started to open up and talk about what had overwhelmed you today.

"I am so sorry." he murmured into your hair.

"I feel better now." you replied quietly.

"For real?"

"You are here so…yes."

A silence fell between the two of you but it was not awkward. At this level of friendship, shared silence was not something new or strange for you. The silence was broken by the sounds of another song.

"Ah, I love this song," he said. "I can't stop listening to it since you showed it to me."

"Well, I'm glad you liked it."

Along with the melody and the singer, Chan's soft and calm voice also began to spread around the room. You closed your eyes relishing the blissful moment, thinking you had found something good in this awful day. If it weren't for the nasty mood, you wouldn't have found comfort and solace in his arms.

How wonderful it would be if you could do this without any excuse?

"Do you remember when we fell asleep together like that, and Hannah took a picture of us and sent it out to all our friends and family saying that we were together?" he asked when the song was over.

"Yes," you laughed slightly at the memory.

"God, I wanted to kill her then." he also laughed.

"Why?"

"Uh, I mean its us, right? Best friends, how could anyone think we are a couple?" he replied embarrassed. This answer turned out to be a strong punch, which you had to take with clenched teeth and pretend that everything was fine.

The thing you didn't know was that what he said was just an escape from the truth. That day when everyone was congratulating you and telling you that you were finally a couple, he was afraid like nothing else that you would discover the truth about his feelings and that deep down he really wanted it to be true. Unfortunately, he did not know that you were on the same page.

Best friends, how could anyone think we are a couple?

These words haunted you for the next few days. No matter how good your mood was, they always came back ruining it instantly. They also pushed you to accepting a date to which you were invited by an employee from the marketing department. You were very often matched for joint projects, you worked very well together, you found nothing of agreement right away, but you didn't see this being blinded by Chan and your feelings for him. But since in his opinion you were just friends and had no chance to get out of this sphere, it was time to move on.

"y/n do you have any plans for tomorrow?" I.N asked, passing you in the hallway.

"I don't have until four, why?"

"We have a day off and we wanted to go shopping with Felix, why don't you go for a walk with us?"

"Sure!" the idea was good, you took it as an opportunity to buy something nice for your date.

"Cool, in that case we'll be in touch!" Maknae smiled charmingly, reminding you how similar he is to his skzoo.

"Sounds like a plan." you smiled back and returned to your desk. The rest of the day passed very smoothly and quickly for you.

Before you knew it you were already on your way to go shopping. Yeongin and Felix carefully browsed each hanger however you absent-mindedly only glanced superficially at the clothes. Your date was getting closer and closer however the less time left the more anxious and uncertain you felt. The fact that the person you were to spend the evening with was not Chan made it all seem…wrong.

How else were you able to move on?

Was it fair what you were doing now?

How would you feel if someone went on a date with you just to forget about someone else?

On the other hand, after all, that wasn't your only motive. In truth, you liked Minjun. He was handsome, kind, funny, you had many common interests, you really wanted to get to know him better.

"Earth to y/n!" the voice of Felix brought you back to reality.

"What?" you shrugged.

"Say hello to Chan!" Yeongin exclaimed happily, pointing his phone's camera at you. "We decided to show him how much fun we are having while he has to work."

"You are cruel!" at the sound of his voice you felt like you were caught in a crime. Not knowing what to do you awkwardly waved towards the camera, and then grabbed the first better dress and hid in the fitting room feeling embarrassed. What the hell is wrong with you? you thought looking at your reflection in the mirror.

"Hey, are you okay?" Felix asked lightly knocking on the fitting room door.

"Uh-yes!" you replied quickly, "I'm just trying on a dress!"

"In that case we are waiting for you to show up in it!"

The dress turned out to lie perfectly on you. The guys' assurances that you look good in it finally convinced you to the purchase.

When you got home it was time for preparations. Preparations that stressed you out even more. You tried to drown out your thoughts with music, but it was especially hard when a large part of your playlist consisted of songs by a band whose leader is the person you are trying to forget. The other part of the playlist was the songs you associated with him anyway. When you heard the first notes of Summer Flower you felt that you were in a no-win situation. If for so many years, being thousands of miles away, you had not managed to forget him how were you supposed to do it now having him at your fingertips almost every day? With a sigh you looked at the couch thinking about the moment when he held you there in his arms harmonizing his voice with the song.

What if he were here now?

What if now instead of getting ready for a date you were preparing snacks for a movie night together?

If you could spend the whole afternoon and evening cuddled up with him, holding his hand or playing with his hair if he laid his head on your lap?

Apparently, fate could read your mind, because as you combed your hair through the sound of the music a knock at the door broke through. Then you were greeted by the sight of Chris with a bag of snacks.

"I thought since I missed shopping together, we could make up for it with a marathon instead." he said dodging you at the threshold and entering the apartment.

Not knowing what to say you stared at him. The silence on your part prompted him to stop. Still not guessing anything, he noticed the brush in your hand and the knot in your hair. "Come on, let me help you." You went to the bedroom where you sat in front of the mirror. He hummed under his breath combing your hair with a slight smile on his lips enjoying this little moment. Whenever he combed your hair you laughed that he was giving you the princess treatment. That wasn't the case this time, which made him feel a little strange. "What do you feel like? a movie? kdrama? anime?" he tried to strike up a conversation. The fact that you haven't spoken a word since he came in increased this feeling.

"Chris…" Hearing your quiet, nervous voice he looked around. A dress hanging on a hanger, waiting to be put on, cosmetics scattered next to the mirror, an open jewelry box. It didn't take him long to guess that watching together today wouldn't work out.

"Are you going out somewhere?" he asked.

"I'm going on a date…" You said while sticking your gaze to the floor.

"Oh." visibly surprised, he stopped combing your hair for a moment. "Who's the lucky guy?" he asked in a forced joking tone, not wanting to make the situation seem even stranger.

"Minjun from the marketing department." you wanted to avoid looking at him at all costs. You were afraid of what you might see if you lifted your gaze. You were afraid that you would see disappointment, or worse, happiness and satisfaction that you were going out with someone else. However, if you actually looked at him you would see Channie's charming smile turn into a heartbroken expression. He could feel the jealousy building up in him, which he had to nip in the bud already. He couldn't let you notice, so he finished combing your hair as quickly as possible and left, explaining that he didn't want to disturb your preparations. You didn't protest, but something inside you was asking, begging even to tell you not to go anywhere and to stay here with him.

"I can't believe you lost to the guy from the marketing department." said Minho sitting down on the couch next to him. As soon as he left your flat he wanted to hole up in the studio however, halfway through a message about a movie marathon appeared on the group chat.

"Actually, he didn't lose because there was no competition," said Han.

"Exactly, if you had told her how you felt earlier she would have definitely chosen you" added Changbin.

"Can we focus on the movie?" he asked exasperatedly.

"Sorry hyung but this is definitely more interesting than the movie". said Hyunjin.

"You should go there and break the date." suggested Seungmin.

"Make up some excuse and call that you two absolutely must meet now!" I.N followed his idea.

"Can you guys just shut up and focus on the movie?" he asked more annoyed. There was a silence all around, which made him feel even worse. "I'm sorry…" he sighed. "I know I screwed up, but it's too late."

"We just want you to be happy." said Felix handing him a brownie on a plate.

"Even if it did work out…she doesn't deserve to hide and keep everything a secret."

"Maybe she won't mind? Maybe you can find a solution? Whatever is going on between you two has been going on for years, look how far you've come."

"Let's just focus on the movie, please."

Despite the fact that the guys had let the subject go and now the room was filled with laughter and loud comments about what was happening on the screen Chris couldn't focus at all. His head was filled with scenarios of what you can do now, did you have fun, did you let him hold your hand? hug you? kiss you? Jealousy bubbled up inside him but what could he do?

Somewhere near the end of the movie, his phone started vibrating with notifications, which he decided to ignore. Seungmin, however, annoyed by the constant vibrating, grabbed his phone to mute it but your nickname caught his attention.

"Chan you won't believe who it is." he said with a smile and started typing something.

"Who?" asked the unmoved leader, the only person he wanted to see a message from now was having a great time on a date with someone else. He didn't get an answer for a long moment.

"y/n didn't go on the date." This sentence made all the energy come back to him and he immediately snatched the phone from his hand to see the news.

c97b: why are you sending me tiktoks while being on a date? (your nickname): I am not on the date c97b: what? (your nickname): he cancelled last minute, so…

He looked at the phone in disbelief.

"Do something!" a shout from Lee Know brought him back to reality.

"This is your chance!" applauded Changbin.

Before he had time to think anything through his fingers were already running across the keyboard.

c97b: put the dress on. (your nickname): what? c97b: wear the dress, I will be there in 10.

What the hell is he doing? What will he tell you? How will he behave?

Thoughts and insecurities ate him from the inside out, and his hand was shaking when he was knocking at the door. However, when you opened it suddenly all the bad thoughts disappeared. All that mattered was how beautiful you looked now, and the struggle with the need to take you in his arms and not let you out of them.

Greeting you with a boyishly charming smile, he said it would be a shame if all your preparations for the going out went to waste. It was enough to make your disappointment with Minjun disappear. Enough for him to completely disappear from your thoughts which were once again completely possessed by your best friend.

Enjoying the last rays of sunshine today you went to the park for ice cream. You took a blanket with you to sit on the grass near the pond.

The meeting was not much different from the others, you were talking about everything and nothing, walking along the winding paths, watching the dogs playing, laughing how wonderful it would be to have little Berry here with you now and how she would love it here. The ice cream was the perfect cool down and sweetness, but Chan's showing dimples and his silly jokes were much sweeter.

Moments before sunset, you spread out your blanket and sat in silence watching the sky slowly turning orange and the sun disappearing behind the horizon directing its last warm rays at you, which you accepted with a smile.

"Thank you Channie." you said looking away from the scenery. Now you were able to notice that instead of watching the sunset, he was looking at you.

"You have nothing to thank me for." He shrugged his shoulders.

"For being there." You smiled slightly.

"I always will be." he replied without thinking.

"That's what friends are for, right?" You couldn't help the note of sadness creeping into your voice.

"y/n…" suddenly his face paled.

"What's wrong?" you asked worriedly.

"I think- I-" he began to stammer.

"Chris, whats going on?" The darkest scenarios appeared in front of your eyes, and panic rose in you.

"I think I am in love with you." he whispered.

"Oh my god-" surprised you covered your mouth with your hand. The shock on your face scared him more than it would have if your reaction had been instant rejection.

"I know, I know! But- I beg you even if you don't feel the same, let's just forget about it, I just had to tell you, finally after all these years, I couldn't hold it in anymore, but I understand that I'm just a friend to you, I don't want to lose you just because of some stupid feelings, hmp-" suddenly his ranting was interrupted by your lips. Sweet, soft lips that he had dreamed of touching for years. He had just fulfilled a scenario that had always seemed unattainable. Without wasting a moment he cupped your face making you cling even closer to him. The happiness that filled you pressed a smile to your lips that interrupted the kiss.

"If your feelings are stupid that means mine are too, because I feel exactly the same as you, you fool." you said quietly.

"I am a fool, a fool for you." he replied and kissed you again.

When you broke away from each other, this time hugging, you finished watching the sunset, which now seemed much more beautiful.

"It's gonna be hard…" he said after a moment of silence.

"Love isn't easy" you said. "b"But it's definitely worth it."

"How are we going to deal with all this?"

"We will find a solution, we always do."

"You think so?"

"Channie…" you took his hand, brought it to your lips and gently kissed the top of it. "I don't want to suddenly become your whole world, you won't be mine either, we both have separate lives, but love is not about the other person suddenly becoming the only thing we see. Love is about understanding that we both have separate worlds but we also have the desire to merge them. Love is finding a common path together."

"You are walkig hope, you know this?"

"Love is not fate, it is a choice. And that's what makes it powerful." You added again kissing his hand.

"You are my choice." he replied kissing your forehead.

No matter how crazy the collision of these worlds will be, he believed that as long as you are together everything will work out.

139 notes · View notes

rocketturtle4 · 7 months

Text

Only Friends, Shipping Culture, Cross-Generational Differences, Themes and Endgame

Strap in, folks. This is a long one.

What finally pushed me to make this post was a very interesting discourse between @lurkingshan, @waitmyturtles, and @twig-tea here around the way this show has subverted norms to a lesser extent than first hoped and how the fans themselves, and the creator’s interactions with these fans, have impacted the creation and completion of the show, as well as the way themes built through the series may now feel less clear after the latest episode.

I wanted to offer my understanding and perspective because it differs somewhat, but it is also very much informed by this post and the larger Tumblr discourse around Only Friends and shipping culture that this show has sparked. I will note, for the record, that I have been much busier since about episode 5 of OF than I had been for the first episodes (or than I was for BMF), so I have missed a lot more of the fascinating discourse that this show has sparked than I would wish.

Let’s do this.

Shipping Culture

I had never heard of this before joining Tumblr this year (in May) despite watching 50 BLs before that, due to being completely disengaged from the actors as individuals prior to joining Tumblr, and while Tumblr has opened my eyes to how much fanservice is part of these people’s lives and jobs and the problems surrounding that phenomenon. I remain largely disengaged from the actors personally. I do not have Twitter, Tik Tok or Instagram, I rarely watch BTS and even my revelation that First is the most beautiful man ever to exist (and I say that as a person who is both aro and ace) has only got me to watch one First & Khao Armshare interview (The Eclipse one). I have also never purchased merch or event tickets so I am in fact, not a good fan in terms of profit making or engagement.

I do, however, love the shows an awful lot and may engage with BTS more once I have fewer things to watch…

All this to say is that my firsthand knowledge of such things is limited at best, but I am still here to say:

I think Only Friends is doing excellent things here, even if all the ‘couples’ end up together.

Is it burning them to the ground like so many hoped? No, but I have watched 47 Thai BLs at this stage and not many of them explored relationships beyond the pairs in any way, shape or form, and OF HAS DONE THAT.

Of our main six characters, NONE of them have only kissed their “other half.” They’ve literally all at least made out with one other person from the core six, and thus far Mew, Boston and Nick have ALSO kissed other people.

This is, in my humble opinion, A PRETTY BIG DEAL.

I am currently watching Not Me (for the first time, haven’t finished, no spoilers please), and I have been informed somewhat reliably that the original novel included a Gram/Black plotline that was cut/altered (to Gram/Eugene/Black love triangle), and I posit that was due in part because they couldn’t have Gun even KISSING Mond even if he was also kissing Off. Black and White would have been a great way to shift things even a little by having the branded pair be together while ALSO having half the brand with someone else at the SAME TIME. Can you imagine??

And yet as recently as 2021 that didn’t happen.

Sometimes change takes time and patience and I think OF is doing really good work, even if it doesn’t go as far as we might wish.

EVEN IF all our branded pairs end up together unsubverted (which is not what I am hoping for but EVEN IF), this show will have still begun paving the way for more varied storylines and pairings in shows

The Clash of Generational Lenses

Speaking of the end game, lets talk about a little thing called hope.

I had a very interesting discourse back around, hmmm episode 6, with @shouldiusemyname and @plantsarepeopletoo , about the sheer confusion I felt about Tumblr’s idea that every one of these characters should end up apart simply because they’d done bad things or something? (this is extremely generalized. I was missing a lot of nuance from both Tumblr and my own lens hence the unpacking then and now).

Now I went into this show fully prepared for this to end sadly and I largely viewed this expectation of sad as everyone ending up broken up and alone. I don’t normally watch sad by choice, but I was willing to try this one because Jojo’s stories are SO beautifully compelling that I knew it would be worth the journey. I have watched Love of Siam (not Jojo but sad) and Gay Okay Bangkok (complicated), two very different shows reflective of their times and their creators and from the beginning, Only Friends did not feel like those (although the links to Gay Okay Bangkok and the exploration of real queer relationships has been fascinating and I am very glad I watched that one before OF).

So why was there this, almost prescribed hopelessness, being projected onto these very young characters who were just in the process of finding themselves? Why were these young people’s flaws and choices so linked to the idea that they would end up alone?

Now @shouldiusemyname told me the following (in the context of a much wider discourse):

Ahhh I like this cos this is something I take very much for granted and I think it’s a generational gap thing. This is a reaction to the way we were brought up (again generalizing cos sometimes it’s necessary). There was no alternative to monogamy and being queer meant that you can’t have that for 2 reasons: 1. Law doesn’t allow 2. Socially unacceptable cos being gay was seen as what kind of sex you were having as opposed to relationships. If you don’t have the gay sex, you’re not gay. This is also the reason for being anti het norm. We couldn’t have that so we needed to find the alternative and have ALL of it.

We were both generalizing A LOT, but this idea was MIND BLOWING to me at the time.

(For the record I am born late 1990s, Shouldiusemyname is born early 1980s (and Plantsarepeopletoo is born late 80s so we have variety covered lol!))

Because while, (as @waitmyturtles for example has pointed out on multiple occasions) the imposition of purity culture and monogamy on queer culture (and in general) is wrong, the idea that no queer people are desiring commitment or monogamy is also wrong. (I am not here suggesting that even in an ideal world where queer people TRULY HAD equal rights they would magically all want monogamous long-term relationships because that’s just not true. In addition hets regularly oppose the het norm as well, long-term monogamous relationships are unwanted by many of them).

I come from a strong biological background (which unequivocally supports more than two sexes and more than two genders, do not come back here and make this about that, got it!) and am currently doing a PhD in Palaeontology so a lot of my relationship understanding is informed by a wider understanding of breeding, monogamy and nonmonogamy in reproduction across the animal and plant kingdoms just by exposure (and yes reproduction in the plant kingdom is very much included, some plants have both male and female parts, it’s fascinating!). And monogamy is present in a hugely wide range of species, it’s not soley something humans came up with just because of religious norms. Addtionally, there is the development of consistent monogamous and/or committed polygamous relationships (historically, most commonly men with multiple wives) across a huge number of cultures throughout history largely for the fostering of children. Most of this influence has been more irrelevant for the queer community because of their inability to produce children in monogamous pairs*, and children are a huge sticking point for the NEED for long-term stable relationships. So, without this sticking point (combined with the aforementioned factors around law and discrimination), relationships are viewed as less permanent. Thus, I had to unpack my own casual assumptions that relationships normally have a long-term goal. (*Generalizing hugely, obviously there are lots of variations that can produce biological children without assistance, but these points most strongly apply to same-sex relationships)

For example, I find the way this plays out in a show like What Did You Eat Yesterday particularly fascinating, and have realized since starting Season 2 that I had missed a lot of this subtext in the first season because, to me, the idea that the central couple would stay and grow old together was a given. PARTLY because of monogamous cultural lenses, but ALSO because they loved each other and wanted to be together, so why wouldn’t they assume they would stay and grow old together?

I also realized that I am further sheltered in this mindset by not just my age but by the acceptance of my wider family of non-marriage as a concept (or even just not having to have children) as normal and okay. My Grandfather (in his 80s) is one of 10 children and has multiple siblings (my great uncles/aunts) who 1 never married or 2 married but chose never to have children. While I am not going to pretend that my uncles/aunts were never judged for such things, that judgment was NEVER part of my upbringing and we visited my single and/or childless great-uncles just as often as those with children.

I seem to have gotten sidetracked…What is the wider point I am making here?

Ah yes

Only Friends is so interesting because it’s shot like it’s set in the 80s & 90s, before the turn of the millennia, with so much homage paid to the queer stories and reality that the youth of this time grew up with. But the generational change that the last two decades or so have brought is inarguably huge, and so these characters, all born after the turn of the century, are not truly from the world that, in some ways, it looks like they’ve been placed into. @wen-kexing-apologist did an extremely comprehensive post about gay cruising culture and Boston that was extremely relevant to his character and the story being told, but it also was a specific throwback to something that is different in the 2020s. Not because people like Boston don’t exist, but because the turn of the century brought with it so many things that make this exact thing more complicated.

And OF has been showing us why! Surveillance, SO MUCH surveillance, every character has been recorded or recorded other characters or shared recordings of other characters, sometimes all of the above, and this surveillance does have a deep impact on the relationships today’s young people engage in! Not just the queer community but all young people of today are under near constant scrutiny and surveillance, and the young people born in the last couple decades have grown up like this, queer or not.

One last thing to mention here is the specific, observable, phenomenon that has been going on in Thailand, it is clear when you look at media like Love of Siam (2008) and compare it to ITSAY (2020) (which I haven’t even seen yet gah but I still know this is a great example). The phenomenon of BL, for all its flaws, has wrought change in the psyche and culture of the people of Thailand, ESPECIALLY the young people, and this is absolutely informing our six main characters views on relationships because they would have gone through high school with this as a major part of their culture.

Themes and Endgame: I Think Hope is the Point

All this draws me back into how I think OF will end, because it’s been at the heart of the show throughout, and that is hopefully, Only Friends will end hopefully.

Jojo has (I believe) stated outright that his primary goal for this show was to represent his community in truth, the messy non-het non-monogamy of queer youths in their 20s has been playing out across our screens, but the thing that has been keeping my attention riveted on Only Friends is the heart of it all.

The journeys of growth and discovery on this show have been magnificent. @thegalwhorants has been pointing out the intentional parallels of language this show has been using to highlight some of that growth, and that is just one very interesting fraction of the way this show has used words, music (@plantsarepeopletoo), colours, styles and more to represent the transformation characters are going through as they grow into themselves before our eyes.

A few very brief examples:

Mew’s switch to wearing Ray’s wardrobe when he is trying not to care but cares so much about Top.

Ray’s changed wardrobe to match the style Sand picked out for him even as he tried to choose Mew and couldn’t, because he’s already moved on, even when he couldn’t accept it.

Nick’s whole makeover to catch Boston’s attention later even catching Dan’s attention and the way that in that scene with Boston outside in ep10, Nick had returned to his shorts and t-shirt because he finally felt seen the way he sees Boston.

One’s sense of self is often built in part, around their relationships (family, friends, sexual and romantic), ESPECIALLY in collectivist cultures, and so much of our 20s involves growing and learning who you are through these relationships. I have seen arguing about toxic friendship groups and how they all need to just let each other go, and maybe that is the best endgame, I don’t know. Sometimes, growing together can be so much stronger, and sometimes, growing apart is the only way to move forward.

But these last two eps in particular (but honestly every moment of this show) have left me with the feeling that hope is the point. Because things HAVE changed, the world is moving and the things possible in 2023 are often utterly unthinkable to the youth of the 1980s, 1990s and before. The world is growing, acceptance and love have always been there but, surveillance or no, it’s so much easier to find now.

To be queer is no longer to be isolated, not in the way it once was, it is not a sentence of aloneness. Nor a stamp of irrevocable pain. Are things good now? HECK NO, you look at any statistic: homelessness, mental health, suicide rate, poverty; Being queer makes your life harder.

No matter how hard you try things might get worse and while that’s true for all people, queerness compounds that and often makes the consequences of your choices harder through isolation.

But the isolation is less now and I think OF wants to show that

You may do many things and sometimes these things will hurt no matter how careful you are, Not caring isn’t the point, Not feeling isn’t the point, God every character on this show feels so MUCH

This episode had moments of complete heartbreak

Complete regret

And complete Joy

And there is much more still to come

So when I think about endgame, I think about hope, and the lessening of isolation for all, and this does not mean 3 perfectly happy couples in perfect monogamous relationships wrapped up with a neat little bow, It means six individuals who have learned and grown through friendship and love, this may mean healed relationships, it may not, this may mean healed friendships, it may not. (It may mean Top, Mew and Boeing in a throuple but maybe I’m the only one hoping for that lol). We’ve clearly got more drama and pain to come but I am confident now that things will end with hope.

I do not know how Jojo and co will show that, but I trust them, and I can’t wait to find out.

#ofts #only friends the series #only friends #onlyft #rturts is wondering #only friends meta #ofts meta #roc goes haywire over only friends

109 notes · View notes

waratah-moon · 2 years

Text

SMAU where y/n plays young Rhaenyra on HOTD and her Instagram interactions with the cast. This is literally just shameless self-indulgent fluff. masterlist, here’s another Matt Smith SMAU

January 2022

tagged theemilycarey

28,461 likes

yourinstagram Coming for the throne

↳ theemilycarey The girlies take Westeros

↳ yourinstagram Margaritas in hand

↳ theemilycarey We’ll make a day of it

username Alicent and Rhaenyra supremacy

username My lesbian senses are tingling

May 2022

deuxmoi via Instagram stories

June 2022

tagged gameofthrones, houseofthedragonHBO

Liked by emilia_clarke and 103,361 others

yourinstagram What’s a Targaryen without a dragon?

theemilycarey It’s about drive it’s about power 💥

emmaziadarcy We have the best childhood photos

↳ yourusername Very royal, amirite?

houseofthedragonHBO Fire and blood will reign 🩸

username August can’t come quick enough

July 2022

75,317 likes

enews More pics from the world premiere of #houseofthedragon online!

username Love a good old family reunion

username How are they all so attractive

username The faith of the seven is in that dress

username Y/n is giving Targaryen realness

Liked by theemilycarey, livkatecooke and 204,537 others

yourinstagram Touristy things and interviews

fabienfrankel Photo credit pls 📸

↳ yourusername Sorry fabienfrankel u a great job at taking the first photo. Really got the angles right.

username I love that the cast is friends outside of set

username MATT SMITH CONTENT

username This cast’s chemistry is insane

September 2022

tagged yourusername

Liked by fabienfrankel and 101,428 others

theemilycarey sneaky lil snap from behind the scenes of episode 3

yourusername besties forevsies

↳ theemilycarey ❤️❤️❤️

username my feed is just Emily and Y/n and I’m not upset

username yesssss bts content

32,461 likes

hotdfans Tonight we say goodbye to the incredible Y/n L/n and Emily Carey.

username I’m really going to miss them

username Rhaenyra’s chemistry with Daemon is off the charts

↳ username Y/n’s chemistry with Matt is off the charts

username They should have done a whole season with Y/n and Emily

tagged theemilycarey, fabienfrankel

Liked by paddy_considine and 780,672 others

yourinstagram I love you all so much

fabienfrankel You’ll be missed kiddo

↳ yourusername I’m still coming to dinner

↳ fabienfrankel Damn thought I got rid of you

↳ yourusername Never

theemilycarey Thnks fr th mmrs ❤️

emmaziadarcy Couldn’t have asked for anyone better

livkatecooke Can’t wait to see you take on the world yourusername

username Living for bts content

username If I just replay the first 5 episodes it means she hasn’t been recast, right?

#house of the dragon #milly alcock #matt smith #fabien frankel #house of the dragon fanfic #matt smith x reader #emily carey #smau #hotd social media au #matt smith smau #social media au #maggie writes #rhaenyra #rhaenyra targaryen

520 notes · View notes

hannyoontify · 11 months

Text

lessen your burden - choi seungcheol

member | seungcheol x gn!reader

genre | angst, js hurt no comfort, breakup!au (i apologize in advance)

word count | 1.2k

synopsis | seungcheol loved you more than anything, but when he learns that you no longer feel the same way, he's still a little reluctant to let you go.

warnings | cursing, seungcheol is extremely emotionally codependent/unstable, reader is a bit of a dick (i think), arguing, reader loses their shit

notes | to be completely honest, i can't tell who's the "bad guy" here bc this is loosely based on true events from yours truly 💀 tag yourself i'm [name]

''i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i'm such a shitty boyfriend and i'm sorry that i keep having these bad thoughts about us and-'

'seungcheol, what are you saying right now?' you asked, a hint of sleep still laced in your voice. it's only been 3 minutes since you woke up and your boyfriend was sitting in bed next to you with tears in his eyes as he apologized profusely for absolutely nothing. you wondered if this was his fourth or fifth time crying to you this week.

'i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i don't know what else to say, i feel like i should be apologizing right now, but i don't know. i'm sorry. i'm stressed and today just isn't a good day' he rambled on, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

'seungcheol, what the fuck are you talking about? it's only been 5 minutes since we woke up, what do you mean it's not a good day' you said. you would be lying if you said that you weren't slightly agitated by this whole situation because this wasn't what you wanted to hear first thing in the morning.

you noticed seungcheol flinch at your choice of words and you ran a hand against your tired face. 'sorry, i didn't mean to curse'

to say that you and seungcheol's relationship had been tense recently would be an understatement. with your upcoming performance test and potential promotion at work, you were stressed and under a lot of pressure to do well. seungcheol was also job hunting after he was let go from his previous company that was financially struggling. every day, he sat at his computer as he sent out resume after resume and only left your apartment to drink with his friends or for interviews which never ended well.

the two of you had been getting into more arguments as well. it first started out small; bickering when you found a miscellaneous sock on the floor when you got home that soon transitioned to screaming matches every other night. but now, you were both too tired for that as well. you knew, eventually, that you two would break up. it was inevitable.

it wasn't that seungcheol was a bad person or a bad partner, you were simply incompatible with him. that, and you also fell out of love with him at some point and grew tired of your relationship with him. it seemed like all you ever did was give, but you received almost nothing.

'can you please hold me?' seungcheol asked in a quiet voice. a small, exasperated sigh left your lips before you could register what you were doing. once you did, you tried to cover it up by rustling the duvet loudly and motioned for your upset boyfriend to come closer to you.

but seungcheol noticed. he always did. he noticed the way you slightly rolled your eyes whenever he came up to you on the verge of tears. he noticed that every night, you seemed to inch further and further away from him until you were on the edge of the bed, threatening to fall off the mattress. he always tried to brush it off, making up lame excuses for your distant behavior, but now, it was getting harder for him to think of excuses.

pressing his head against your chest, seungcheol listened to your soft heartbeat as you absentmindedly ran your fingers through his hair.

'cheol, we should break up' you quietly said. seungcheol pulled away from your embrace and looked straight ahead. he couldn't look at you. he wouldn't.

'why?' oh he knew why. seungcheol knew why but he still wanted to hear it coming from your mouth–

'i don't love you anymore'

–he takes it back. he takes it all back. he never wants to hear those words coming out of your mouth ever again, it felt like a punch to his gut. seungcheol suddenly couldn't breathe.

'[name], you don't- you don't mean that. please. i need you to comfort me right now, tell me that everything is going to be okay. you can't leave me, not when i'm at my lowest point like this'

you silently slid out of your bed and put on your bathrobe, facing your back towards him. 'i'm sorry, seungcheol. i don't know if i can do this anymore. i'm tired. doesn't my lack of effort make you feel unloved? like you deserve better?'

your boyfriend–almost ex–shook his head profusely. 'no, you're perfect for me. please don't leave me [name]'

'begging isn't gonna get you anywhere, choi seungcheol'

hearing his full name coming from your lips made seungcheol's blood run cold. you only called him by his full name when you were on the verge of lashing out at him and against his better judgement, he apologized again. 'i'm sorry, [name]. if you tell me what i did wrong, i'll fix it and-'

you whipped around. for the first time that day, seungcheol saw your eyes though now he wishes he never had. your usual shining eyes were void of any love and joy that used to be there. instead, they were dark and stormy. full of anger and scorn.

'when is the last time you've comforted me, seungcheol? you go on and on about how you need me and you need to be comforted by me. think about it. when's the last time, you've held me in your arms and told me those 5 words that you want to hear all the time?' once the floodgates had opened, there was no turning back.

seungcheol sat there, stunned as you continued to berate him. what you were saying wasn't wrong. he had been so focused on trying to make himself feel better, he never bothered asking you what was on your mind. he wondered how often your words 'it's going to be okay' were actually meant for you instead of him.

'when i wasn't chosen for the promotion last month, where were you? you were out, drinking with your friends until 2 in the fucking morning'

'i don't understand why you're so obsessed with the promotion, you're still young and you have plenty of time-'

'I DID IT FOR YOU, SEUNGCHEOL. I DID IT FOR US' in the end, you had exploded. 'EVERYONE'S ON MY ASS 24/7 ASKING ME WHEN I'M GONNA GET MARRIED. HOW CAN I GET MARRIED WHEN MY BOYFRIEND IS UNEMPLOYED AND MY PAYCHECK CAN BARELY SUPPORT US BOTH?!'

you took a deep breath, not realizing until now that you were crying. there were tears streaming down your cheeks, similar to seungcheol. taking a moment to collect yourself, you rubbed at your eyes, trying to stop your flowing tears.

'everyday, i get yelled at and scolded by my seniors. i'm currently doing the workload of two people, do you remember me telling you that?'

seungcheol felt a pang of guilt in his chest. he did remember and watching you breakdown like this left him in horror–

'and then i come home, to my apartment that i pay for. and the dishes are still in the sink. the laundry isn't folded. did you expect me to do all the housework as well?'

–was he really this much of a burden to you?–

'i'm tired of this, seungcheol. please. i'm tired of giving and not receiving anything in return' although you stopped crying, your eyes were glistening with tears as you looked at him desperately.

–if that's what you really wanted, he would give it to you–

'i'll be out of here by the end of this week'

–because he still loved you.

121 notes · View notes

dutchvanwinkle · 11 months

Text

Mr Van der Linde Pt. 10 - Dutch x Reader

This is it, angels! The last chapter of the Mr Van der Linde mini-fic. This has been an absolute joy to write, thank you for allowing me to indulge in my fantasy and for being the most wonderful group of enablers a writer could ever ask for. The response to this story has been much more than I expected, and I’ve had the best time sharing it with you. Thank you endlessly for your support and hype <3

It's on ao3, if you'd rather read there!

Summary: You deal with the consequences of your actions.

Word count: 9,037

Content warnings: smoking, drug use

‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗

You’d blocked Dutch’s number. It was the only thing left to do.

It was the first action you took upon getting on that train. You knew that if you heard his voice or read a single word from him, you’d cave.

The level of agony you felt was like nothing you’d ever experienced. Your heart was broken, so much so that you were surprised the thing was still able to beat. All of a sudden, two of the most important people in your life were strangers. The man you loved, and your best friend.

God, you missed them.

You missed John’s laugh down the phone, or the way his eyes grew heavy after he’d had one too many drinks. You missed the way he’d snuggle into you while hungover or come and see you just so you could sit in a comfortable silence together. He was about to become a father, and there you went piling more stress onto his already heavy load.

It didn’t bear thinking about how much you missed Dutch. It was too painful to even list the things you loved the most about him, that you knew you’d never get to experience again.

It was a miracle that your other friends were still speaking to you. The boys had been quiet, siding more so with John but not quite willing to cut you out completely. The girls still got in touch with you regularly, and you weren’t sure what you’d do with yourself if they didn’t.

Abigail updated you on her pregnancy over the next few weeks, and it was like a knife to the chest at the realisation that you wouldn’t even be able to meet her baby, at least not for a long time.

She and Karen had been distraught when you announced the news that you weren’t going to attend graduation, but you’d thought it through for long enough. Everyone would be there, family members included. You daren’t even think about how awkward the whole affair would be. Not going was the most sensible thing you could do, and being sensible was at the top of your current list of priorities.

You’d received a call a week after the party from the job you interviewed for and were offered a place. Without the ability to share the news with those you wanted to hear it most, it’d only made you more depressed.

It’d taken you a few days to type out the message to John. You started off by saying you were only going to try getting in touch with him this once since you couldn’t bring yourself to ask for his forgiveness; you knew it wasn’t something you deserved. Then, you’d explained how it happened. Sparing him the details, of course, you ran through the timeline of your and Dutch's relationship and gave him the full truth. It felt false and cliché when you started talking about how you hadn’t meant for it to happen, but it was true. To a point. You’d finished off by saying that you would always be there for him, should he ever decide he wanted to interact with you again. Then you clarified that you’d never expect him to and offered him one final apology.

He’d read it not long after, and you were already prepared for him not to reply, so it wasn’t too much of a bluster when it went unanswered. There was a small, naïve part of you that clung to the possibility that he could, though.

Graduation was one week away. You wanted it over with, even though you weren’t going, and had planned to take a social media break while everyone posted their smiling photos with relatives and friends.

Curled up in bed, hiding from the world under your duvet was your most recent pastime as of late, you huffed and shut the book you weren’t able to read. Ever since that day at the Van der Linde’s, you had an awful tension headache that wouldn’t shift no matter what you did. So instead, you shut your eyes, hoping you’d fall into a nap to pass the time.

After a few minutes, your phone began vibrating and with a tired grunt, you leaned over, becoming instantly more alert at the name that was on your screen.

John.

You held the phone in your hands like it would explode if you moved it too harshly, staring at the screen until the call rang out and the vibrating stopped.

It had to have been an accident. You didn’t want to deal with the awkward scenario of picking up, to be faced with a spluttering John explaining it was a mistake. Then your phone buzzed again, this time with a message.

Call me when you’re free.

It was the longest you’d gone without breathing, your body forgetting its most basic survival instinct and going into complete shock. He was finally ready to yell at you, to call you all the names under the sun and explain how badly he wished he’d never met you. You wanted to throw the whole phone away, but he deserved the chance to have a go at you if it’s what he wanted, and you took a deep breath before pressing the call button by his name.

Time had never moved as slowly as it had during the three rings that elapsed before they stopped, and then John spoke through the phone.

“Hey.”

Hearing his voice was enough to make you tear up, but you cleared your throat and willing yourself to remain steady. “Hi.”

John sighed, and you could only imagine how nauseating it was for him to have to interact with you. “Abigail said you’re not coming to graduation.”

“No, I’m not.”

He sighed again, finding his words. “That don’t seem fair.”

Your eyebrows pulled together, unable to make sense of where this conversation was going. “I don’t reckon I deserve fair,” you said, immediately hearing how self-pitying you sounded. “It’s fine, I don’t want to go anyway.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

“It doesn’t matter.” After a beat of silence, your emotions got the better of you. “John, I’m so sorry -”

“Don’t.” He was stern but softened his voice for his next sentence. “I know we need to talk, but not like this.”

Unsure what to say, you decided to allow John some room to speak further.

“Come to graduation. We’re all staying at the house the night before,” you knew that already, just because you didn’t respond in the group chat didn’t mean you weren’t reading the messages, “before we have to pack up and leave.”

The mere thought of being there with everyone, seeing them all with their families and then seeing Dutch too was enough to send your brain into overdrive. “I can’t.”

“It won’t be the same without you.”

You pressed your lips together, hoping to keep your composure just a little while longer. “John, I’m confused. Aren’t you mad at me? Don’t you hate me?”

“Yes. Mad at you, I mean. I don’t hate you though. Trust me, I tried to,” he sounded reluctant to admit to it. “I’ve had time to think. And I know I’ll regret it if I know I didn’t at least try to get you to come.”

“You know, I think I’d prefer it if you yelled at me.”

John laughed mirthlessly. “Part of me wants to, but... it won’t do no good.”

The silence hung between you, and despite all the things you wanted to say to him, you couldn’t find a single word.

“Look,” he began. “You still mean a lot to me. You worked hard on this degree and truthfully... I wouldn’t have got mine if it weren’t for you. I want you there with me.”

You choked, because you didn’t deserve him being so kind and he repeated your name for you to just nod, even though he obviously couldn’t see you. “Sorry,” you whispered, and while it was an apology for your lack of response, you used it as a chance to let out some of the apology hoard you had stored up.

“Just come, alright? You can leave early if you want. Besides, the others want to see you too.”

After a shaky breath, you decided it was worth a shot. Even if you went to the house the night before and didn’t attend the ceremony, it was worth a try. You said you’d try to rectify it if you could, and this could be the chance to take the first few steps towards that goal. “Alright. I’ll come.”

Some of the tension dissipated through the phone, and you waited for John’s response. “Okay. See you next week.”

Then he hung up.

After the call ended, your phone navigated to the most recently used app, and you were met with your recent search history, mainly along the lines of can a person run out of tears and is anyone close to inventing time travel yet.

Had that just happened? You checked the call logs to confirm that yes, it had. John had called you. He hadn’t yelled at you. He hadn’t so much as berated you. He said you meant a lot to him. He said he wanted to talk to you and see you at graduation.

Holy shit. Your apprehension about not going was immeasurable compared with your apprehension about actually going.

The entire train journey back to university had been spent with you fidgeting, your mind going a million miles an hour at the prospect of what you were about to face. Karen and Abigail were overjoyed you’d agreed to come, and you had a sneaky suspicion Abigail had played a part in convincing John to get in touch with you, even if she wouldn’t admit it.

Instead of taking a bus to your rented house like you usually would, you decided to take the walk to stretch your legs, get some fresh air, and prepare yourself for whatever greeted you when you got there.

But when you did, it still wasn’t enough time. Panic seeped into your veins and your breaths grew short, so you took a seat on the half-wall that acted as a border around your poor excuse for a front garden. No matter what, you couldn’t still your hands, and reluctantly pulled a cigarette out of the pack that resided in your pocket. You lit it, and once you were halfway done, you heard the front door open behind you.

You daren’t look around, not wanting to face whoever had caught you wallowing in your guilt.

But the door clicked shut, and footsteps down the front path preluded John taking a seat beside you.

“I thought you only smoked casually.”

“It helps,” you flicked the ash away, not meeting John’s face. “A little.”

“I see.”

You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth, keeping your gaze fixed on the floor with not a single clue on how to have this conversation.

“How long you plan on sitting out here?” John asked.

“Not sure,” you mumbled.

“You know you can’t stay here forever.”

After a short nod, you plucked up the courage to shift your gaze from the floor and to John. Your dismal state must’ve shown on your face, as he looked at you pitifully. “It's so fucked up,” you began, the tension needling under your skin. “I know it is, I’m so sorry. Sorrier than I know how to express.”

“I believe you.”

Why must he be so calm? Where was the John you knew, the one who’d pick a fight at the first opportunity – the one who’d slammed the door open when he’d caught you in the act? “Just yell at me or something, please. I can’t take it.”

“Don’t rightly think I can, you looking all forlorn as you are,” he hummed, drumming his fingertips on the wall.

Your face was already a permanent frown, but you felt it deepen. All you wanted to do was cry, even if that was the only thing you’d done over the past few weeks. It seemed a person couldn’t run out of tears, after all.

John edged closer, and you immediately shook your head. “No, don’t comfort me, I don’t deserve it.”

“You always do beat yourself up over stuff,” he scoffed gently.

“No, John. I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry.”

“You don’t gotta keep saying that.”

“I don’t know what else I can say.”

He let out a short breath, stretching his neck out. “I do have one question for you.”

Your nod in response was almost eager, willing to answer anything he asked.

“Would you take it back if you could?

“I –” you stopped to take a breath. “Yeah, of course.”

“Funny.”

“Why funny?”

“Dad said he wouldn’t. And he said that’s what he was the sorriest about, that he’d do it all again given the chance.”

You weren’t sure what to say, your heart clutching to hear such a thing but not wanting to show it on your face. You’d wondered how he’d taken the whole thing, the urge to ask Abigail had been strong but you knew you wouldn’t have been able to bear the answer either way. It didn't bear thinking about how much you missed him.

“I have another question.”

“Shoot.”

“More of a clarification.”

“Okay.”

“You really are in love with each other, aren’t you?”

You swallowed, shaking your head to look at your lap but you weren’t saying no, and John knew that. “It’s... I...” you sighed, having no more lies left in you. You met John’s concerned gaze.

“It's okay,” he reassured stiffly.

“No, it’s not okay. Nothing about it is okay. You mean the world to me,” you pressed your lips together to stop them from quivering as tears gathered in your eyes once more. “None of it matters now,” you added dejectedly.

John shifted beside you, finally taking his gaze away and instead planting it somewhere ahead of him. “I think it does.”

“What do you mean?” you asked quietly.

“He’s been... Well, he’s not been good. He’s sorry, to me, but mainly he’s... Heartbroken, I guess. He’s been so happy recently, we’ve all noticed it, and now he’s just... Not.”

It pained you to hear how hurt he was. Knowing you were the cause of his pain, denying him even a single word turned your stomach even more. “Oh, I’m... Sorry.”

John sighed. “I want him to be happy. And I want you to be happy. That’s what means the most to me.”

“I’m sure we’ll both be fine, eventually. Like I said, it’s not important how either of us feel. We did an awful fucking thing, and I guess we both deserve to feel like shit.”

“That’s just it,” John paused as you stubbed out your cig with your foot, “maybe being happy is what you deserve.”

You glanced at him, trepidation and anxiety set into his features. He looked so much older, somehow.

“I’m not saying I’ve forgiven you. Certainly ain’t forgiven him. I’m not saying I’m your biggest fan right now, either. But I just need a bit of time to get used to it. It ain’t worth losing you,” he said pointedly. “You know what my momma said to me, before she passed?” John seldom spoke of his mother, and your ears perked up at the privilege of being his audience. “She said one day, he was gonna love someone again. Said she knew it was hard to hear, hard to imagine him moving on, but that he wouldn’t be complete if he didn’t have someone to love. He loves love. Just the way he is. She also said it’d take him a good long while, and it did – I ain’t never seen him in a relationship since her. In her eyes, that meant that when he finally did move on, it would be with someone I could trust. She told me when the time came, to trust him. And to trust that the person he chose would be someone who cared for me, someone I could rely on.”

Your eyes were brimming by that point, but you didn’t want to do him the disservice of looking away while he was being so raw.

“She was right,” John shrugged.

“You really look at what I’ve done,” you said hoarsely, fighting away a sob, “as the action of someone who cares for you? John, if I cared about you I would never have even let the thought cross my mind.”

“Alright,” he nodded, a challenge, “what about everything else you’ve done in the last few years?”

You blinked at him.

“What about when you set me up with Abigail? What about when you convinced me to carry on at uni, even though I wanted to drop out? What about all the times you’ve looked after me when I was too drunk to see? What about all those deep chats we had late at night? What about when Abigail said she was keeping the baby, and you stayed up with me half the night until I finally slept?”

You didn’t have a response for him.

“I can’t forget all of that,” he said evenly, “even if right now I am mad at you. I know you, I know that you didn’t intend to hurt me with any of this.”

“When did you get so grown up?” your face scrunched, John’s words a soothing balm over your open wounds.

“Can’t expect my kid to turn out alright if I’m still acting like one.”

“Makes sense.”

“I’m not saying it won’t be weird, but... I can learn to deal with it.”

You looked at him with mild incredulity, hardly believing the words coming out of his mouth. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am.”

Again, your eyes filled up and you couldn’t stop the tears, holding your fingertips under your eyes to catch them.

John shuffled closer once again and hesitated, but then put his arm around your shoulders, and you didn’t have it in you to resist nestling into his embrace. “Goddamnit woman,” he scoffed, his voice lighter and more familiar, “will you quit crying already?”

“Can’t help it,” you sniffed.

John rested his head on top of yours and you squeezed your eyes shut, wondering what you did to deserve such a wonderful friend.

After a time, when your tears had dried and your breathing regulated, the two of you ventured inside and were greeted with the sight of your four other friends lazing around in the living room.

You looked at them sheepishly, but they smiled in response, seemingly relieved to see you and John on the way to being on good terms.

At first, it was uncomfortable. The situation was somewhat of an elephant in the room, but it didn’t seem like anyone was up for bringing up the topic. These were your final days altogether, the last remaining part of your lives that made you students. After this, while you’d remain friends, you’d never be living together all under the same roof again. You didn’t need another excuse to cry, so you didn’t spend any more time chasing that train of thought.

Eventually, the conversation flowed easier, and it was almost like you were existing in a time months ago, where you hadn’t made any terrible choices and your friends hadn’t found out about them.

“Still can’t believe we’re meeting your infamous da,” Abigail mocked Sean, who grinned back at her.

“Oh, he’s excited to meet the lot of you, too. I assured him you weren’t all a pompous bunch.”

“My dad’s coming too. Hey,” Javier pointed at you, “make sure you don’t fuck him.”

You glared at Javier, but at the snorts of laughter around the room you couldn’t help but break into a reluctantly amused smirk. “I have no intention of doing such a thing.”

“Did you have the intention to fuck Mr Van der Linde?”

“Can we not.”

Thankfully, even John was laughing, and while you thought the subject was still too tender to poke fun at, you agreed that this may be the easy way of getting it out in the open.

“Hey,” John said, “part of the deal with you fucking my dad is that we’re allowed to tease you for it.”

You shrunk into your seat. “I was not aware of that condition.”

“No? Would you like my permission to be revoked?”

You huffed, thoroughly left without a leg to stand on. “No. Fine.”

Denying John the right to hold this over you, likely for the rest of your life, wasn’t something you could do. If he had to pick on you and tease you, then you’d allow it, so long as it meant the two of you could remain friends.

The six of you settled into a familiar rhythm, laughing and joking until you were all too tired to continue.

When morning came around and you and the girls began getting ready together, your heart tugged at just how much you valued your sisterhood with them. Despite it all, they’d remained your friends, checked up on you, and attempted to provide a sense of normalcy in your life.

“Are you nervous?” Abigail spoke into the concentrated silence, all three of you working on your makeup.

You glanced in your propped-up mirror to see her reflection behind you, awaiting a response. “I assume you’re not talking about walking across the stage.”

She shook her head in the negative. Given the past few weeks, you’d had enough practice banishing thoughts of Dutch from your mind that you’d grown rather good at it. That had included today, where you’d disallowed yourself to picture the ways your reunion could play out.

“I suppose I am a little.”

“Surely you’re excited, though?” Karen added on, sounding rather excited herself.

“Why would I be?”

“Well,” she drawled, “you clearly love the man. Ain’t there a part of you eager to be all lovey-dovey with him again?”

You turned to frown at her face-on, instead of through the reflection in your mirror. “What? No - I’m not going to carry on seeing him.”

They observed you, puzzled, and Abigail decided on a response. “But I thought that was what you agreed on, with John?”

“He said he’d find a way to deal with it. He shouldn’t have to do that,” you turned back to your mirror and continued preening. “I’m not going to start things up with Dutch again,” you lamented.

They didn’t question it, but you could feel their confusion in the air. You couldn’t blame them. They decided not to probe the subject further.

Sure, John had said he’d deal with it. He’d said he wanted you both to be happy. But before all that, you vowed to yourself that you’d do anything to have a friendship with him, and would you really be true to your word if you actively extended his discomfort?

John’s blessing had been music to your ears at first. But being so forgiving was easier said than done – who's to say he wouldn’t grow to resent you, the damage to your friendship being irreparable? It wasn’t a risk you could take.

Thankfully, the ceremony was the first thing on the agenda that day. There were no awkward encounters to be had, and you got to walk across the stage without falling over and receive your degree in relative peace. Again, you’d actively pushed the prospect of seeing Dutch again out of your mind until you were forced to deal with it in real-time.

But once the ceremony was finished, it was time for everyone to socialise in the sunny courtyard while the graduates took photos with their family and friends, leaving nowhere left for you to hide. Unless...

Thanks to your newfound habit, you excused yourself once the six of you had taken a group picture, proof that you had in fact been there, and had at least waited a few minutes before running away.

There was a quiet alley round the side of the main building, the wall of which you leaned up against and brought your newly lit cigarette to your lips. It was nice to decompress, and with all that’d happened in the last twenty-four hours alone, it was nice to have some peace.

You took your time, eventually lighting a second cigarette and deciding this would not be a healthy habit to keep up.

“When did you start smoking?”

That cigarette was nearly choked into your mouth at the baritone of Dutch’s voice, one you hadn’t heard in a longer while than you cared to admit.

You had to face him at some point, you supposed. At least this wasn’t in front of a whole group of people.

Slowly, you turned, the man himself coming into view. His hands were casually in his pockets, and as always, his suit was immaculate, and hair perfectly styled. There was one noticeable difference though; he looked tired.

“Gives me an excuse to escape. Plus,” you shunted the cigarette up a bit, “I miss the taste.” You looked at his lips, the hundreds of drunken kisses the two of you had shared that always had an underlying hint of tobacco. Dutch brushed his fingertips over your hand, and you pulled away, refusing to meet his gaze.

“Please, I can’t.”

“Didn’t John speak to you?”

“Yes, but it doesn’t matter. He’s not okay with it, regardless of what he says.”

Dutch’s shoulders dropped, and he leaned on the wall opposite you. His gaze was fixed on you, and you eventually met it.

The two of you looked at each other for a short while, and it was like you could read his mind, and tell him what you were thinking and feeling without saying a single word.

You missed him, you were sorry, he missed you, he was sorry.

More than anything, you wanted to wrap your arms around him and never let go, kiss him until your lips ached, and make a home in the crook of his neck.

“You blocked my number.” It wasn’t a question.

“I had to,” you took a drag and rolled the cigarette between your fingers once you’d dropped your hand back by your side.

“Did you really? You couldn’t have at least said goodbye – after all we’ve been through?”

“Don’t make me feel bad,” your tone came out angered, and you swiftly reeled yourself in. “I couldn’t feel any worse about the whole thing if I tried. There was no other choice, not if I wanted a chance at earning back John’s friendship.”

“The way I hear it, the two of you are already getting on.”

“He’s being kind. Kinder than I deserve and we’re a long way off repairing our friendship.”

Dutch nodded, and it hurt to see the pain that’d made camp on his face.

“How are things with the two of you?”

“Long way off,” he echoed. “He didn’t speak to me for a while, but he’s starting to be civil. I’m surprised by him, truth be told.”

“Why?”

“He’s been real grown up about it all,” his lips twitched with an unmitigated fondness, “we talked it all out, and he actually listened to my side of it. That’s two of my boys out-manning me, now.”

“Is Arthur okay?” you asked at the mention of him.

“Yeah,” he said noncommittally, “not happy with me either, but can’t say I blame him. Especially not after the Molly business.”

“I did try telling him you weren’t to blame.”

“I know.” The look he gave you was grateful, and you couldn’t only imagine the grief he’d received from the two men.

It was surreal to see him standing there. You wondered if you’d even remember this conversation in a week's time, or whether it’d be some lucid recollection you wouldn’t be able to pick out words from.

“Did you hear back about that interview?”

You nodded. “They offered me a job.”

Despite his saddened expression, a glint of pride broke its way through. “Congrats. You’ll do well there, should you decide to take it.”

“Thanks.” It wasn’t quite the reaction you’d pictured in your mind before all this nasty business, instead, it’d be Dutch pulling you into a boisterous embrace and immediately coming up with a schedule to ensure the two of you saw each other regularly enough.

His pained eyes glanced down your form and made their way back up to your face. The crease between his brows was permanently etched there now, it seemed.

“I’m sorry they found out that way,” he said.

“Me too. I don’t blame you for it.”

“Please,” he took a hesitant step towards you. “Reconsider. Is it not worth us trying, at least? John’s okay with it -”

“He is not. He’s only saying that because he feels obliged.”

“That’s not true, he came to me to talk about it, said he wants us to be together -”

“Do you not hear how insane that sounds? Why would he want his father and b- friend to be in a relationship?”

“Sorry to interrupt,” John’s voice broke into your conversation as he strolled over to the pair of you, “but my ears were burning.”

You both just looked at him, simmering back into your own spaces – it wasn’t a conscious decision to edge closer to Dutch.

“You’re arguing,” he observed.

“I -” you sighed, itching your brow, and abandoned your unformed sentence in favour of another drag from your cigarette.

“This is meant to be a happy day,” Dutch said guiltily.

“No, I know. I think I should go –”

“No,” John put a hand on each of your shoulders, stopping you from walking away from the situation. “Look, I’ll be honest, I’m tired of him moping,” he gestured his head towards his father.

Dutch slipped the cigarette from between your fingers and brought it to his mouth for a long drag. It was like static where his skin had brushed against yours, and your eyes lingered on his lips as he took a drag. He went to hand it back to you, but you shook your head.

“Keep it.”

“And I’m tired of you being so hard on yourself,” he narrowed his eyes at you, before looking between you both once more. “You shouldn’t have done what you did. You shouldn’t have gone behind my back for so long.”

The pair of you glanced at each other, scolded but in agreement with him.

“But I understand why you did. For the pair of you to do this, to take it this far – it must be something genuine.”

More genuine than you cared to admit. Being without Dutch was like being without a limb.

“You deserve the chance to test it out in the open. Ideally,” he huffed in mild amusement, “not too open. I don’t wanna watch you canoodling. But still. You do have my blessing,” he squeezed your shoulder, “and I’m not just saying that. I’ve thought about it, and I mean it.”

There were no words, so you rested your hand over John’s that was still planted on his shoulder.

“Thank you, son,” Dutch said, his voice cracking despite his hardened demeanour.

“Now,” John lightened his tone and the mood, “from what I hear they’re about to open the bar. And I don’t know about either of you but I sure as hell need a drink.”

“I sure do,” you agreed quietly, and Dutch beckoned for the two of you to proceed, and you all made your way over to the bar.

After John’s talk, you began to settle into the idea of trying again with Dutch. You were still hesitant, but since Dutch had reminded you to unblock his number, he’d messaged you regularly and gently brought you around to the idea.

So, you’d started talking more frequently, general chitchat and while it wasn’t quite the same, you found yourself valuing his conversation much more than you had previously. Still, you were hesitant to visit him, but Dutch agreed to ease back into the relationship, and going long periods without seeing him wasn’t an alien concept to you considering that’d been the norm for over two years.

It was only a few more weeks until John messaged the group chat saying Abigail had gone into labour, and he’d sent you a private message saying it might be a good time for you to go to his house, considering nobody would be there and you could have some alone time together.

Dutch too had messaged you, and you allowed your chest to grow warm at the thought of them colluding to convince you to come round. He’d confirmed the house was empty save for him, Tilly spending half of her summer staying at Arthur and Charles’ place.

You decided to bite the bullet and agreed, getting the train that same day before you had a chance to chicken out. Unsurprisingly, Dutch stood firm in his decision to pick you up from the station.

The car journey to his house had been quiet, the two of you not knowing where you stood or how to approach the situation. Arriving at his house and seeing the big stone driveway was enough to make your heartbeat quicken, the memory of your last visit resurfacing.

Dutch had made you a hot drink, and the two of you were sat outside in the late evening summer sun, thankful for the chirping birds that filled the silence.

“If you’re uncomfortable, please tell me. I’ll take you home, and I won’t be offended,” he said gently.

“I’m not uncomfortable,” you settled him, “it’s just a little strange as all. Didn't think I'd ever be here again.”

After a long sigh, Dutch shifted in his seat, angling himself towards you as though he had a secret he wanted only you to hear. “I have a plan.”

You raised your eyebrows at him. “A plan for what?”

“Making you a little more comfortable.”

“Let’s hear it.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a blunt.

You couldn’t resist laughing, looking at him in shock. “You want to get high?”

“Why not?”

“Because,” you began, though no reason came to mind why you shouldn’t. “Because - is that a good idea?”

“Course. Might help us loosen up a little.” His charming smile made you feel all fuzzy – his under eyes were less dark than when you’d seen him last and he looked overall more like himself. He was dressed down in a t-shirt and jeans, and you were appreciative of the delightful view of those hairy forearms of his.

“I didn’t even know you got high.”

“Where do you think John gets it?”

“You sell drugs?” your face shifted from shocked to understanding, “no wonder you’re so rich.”

“I do not sell drugs.”

“No. Just to your son?”

“No, I don’t want him buying overpriced shit from some sketchy dealer. If he’s going to do drugs, he’s going to at least do good drugs. Besides, I don’t support the criminalisation of it.”

“Right,” you laughed, not wanting to spur him onto his well-worn soap box. “Well then,” you plucked it from his fingers to rest it between your teeth and reached into his pocket where you knew he kept his lighter, relishing in the tensing of his thighs, and flicked it on to light the end of the joint. “Let us not waste any time.”

You blew out the smoke and handed it to him, his face looking close to boyish with his grin in response. “I like your attitude.” Dutch took an inhale of his own, and either you really did have a thing for guys when they smoked or this was some strong stuff, because you began to feel all tingly.

Relaxing back on the bench, you took in the view of the garden and tipped your head back, allowing the sun to graze over your face. “I have missed being here.”

“I’ve missed having you here,” Dutch said, and you cracked an eye open at him, to see him observing you fondly. “I’m glad, in a way.”

“About what?”

“It happening the way it did.”

“Why?”

“We don’t have to hide it any longer,” he rested his arm on the bench behind you, “the sneaking around was growing tiresome.”

“I suppose,” you took the blunt from him and brought it to your lips. “Still, not sure I’ll ever recover from that look on John’s face.”

“Let’s not go back there right now. I’ve spent too much time in that space recently.”

You handed the joint back to him thoughtfully. “Has your mental health been okay?”

Dutch chuckled knowingly. “It has not. Thankfully, I’ve learnt to recognise the unhealthy thought patterns, and I was on a higher dose of medication for a while.”

“You’re not now?”

“No,” he shook his head, blowing out the smoke. “After John’s talk, after I could speak to you again – it all calmed down.”

“I see. I’m sorry you were suffering.”

“That’s alright,” he shrugged, passing the joint over to you. Dutch was going to say something else when your phone buzzed, and you pulled it from your pocket, expression brightening at what greeted you on the screen.

“Congratulations are in order,” you tilted the screen towards him, and he looked over your shoulder at the photo of a baby clutched in Abigail’s arms with John leaning over, a tired grin on his face.

Dutch’s face softened into excitement, and he took his reading glasses from his pocket to place them on his face and get a better look. “Oh my, look at that.”

Another photo came through, a close-up of the baby accompanied by a message from John sent to the group chat.

Jack’s here. Abigail had a tough delivery, but she was great, and we now officially have a healthy son. Can’t wait for you all to meet him.

Very to the point, and very on-brand for John. “Jack,” you crooned, “that’s lovely.”

Dutch patted his pocket, scoffing. “My phone’s in the kitchen, let me go text him.”

“You remember the weed, but not your phone while your grandson is being born?”

“Oh hush,” he muttered as he walked into the house.

He returned a few minutes later, while you’d messaged your congratulations along with the rest of your friends.

“How’s it feel to be a grandfather?”

“Good, oddly enough,” Dutch settled beside you, noticeably closer than he had been previously, but you didn’t mind. He took the joint from you and had a couple of drags.

“He’s gorgeous,” you smiled, and the two of you settled into a rhythm of smoking and chatting while the sun bathed you in its rays.

It was a lovely evening, and it wasn’t long before the joint was burnt out and you’d slowly slipped to be nestled into Dutch’s side, his head resting on yours and fingertips running over your palm. The two of you remained like that, fully relaxed and happy just to be near each other, the odd shift in position the only thing to break the peaceful silence.

The movement of Dutch’s fingers had transmuted to the brushing of his palm up your arm, and you tilted your head to look at him. His hands felt so good, so firm and warm, his rings leaving a cool trail in their wake.

He glanced down at you, face content, and you couldn’t help but admire how gorgeous he was.

“I’m hungry.”

“I can order -”

You cupped his jaw and attached your lips to his, not sure you could wait a single moment longer. The two of you still hadn’t shared a kiss since you’d arrived, and the weeks of longing to have his lips on yours had been agonising.

“Oh,” he said once you’d pulled away.

You laughed softly, edging closer despite already being pressed up against him. His eyes had already grown hungry too, and you realised you weren’t hungry at all. You were ravenous.

The two of you demanded the next kiss at the same time, one not nearly enough to make up for all those you’d missed out on. He gripped your waist, and you twisted your hand into the collar of his shirt, the two of you not willing to part with the taste of each other's mouths.

“Darlin’,” he breathed when you both finally surfaced for air, and you touched the tip of your nose to his. “You don’t know how much I’ve missed that.”

“Believe me,” you pecked the corner of his mouth, “I do.”

He ran a hand over your hair and tilted his head when your expression turned devious. “Do I even want to ask?”

You shook your head and stood, leaving him still leaning forward where your body was now absent. “I’d rather show.”

With that you walked into the house, Dutch’s rushed and uneven footsteps soon following behind.

“What are we doing?” he said, excited, as you led him towards the study.

Once there, you sat on his desk and parted your legs. “I believe we have some unfinished business.”

“Oh,” he smirked and stopped in his tracks, running a hand through his hair and visibly less rigid thanks to the herbs in his system.

His eyes were fixed on the spot between your thighs as he stalked towards you, reaching his hands out and gripping your thighs once he was close enough, pulling them even further apart and growling from his chest as he nestled his crotch between them. You bit down on your lip when you felt how hard he was, becoming acutely aware of how much wetter you were than usual, likely a mix of your heightened senses and the given circumstance.

“I do admire your thoroughness, miss,” he murmured into your ear, trailing his lips over your lobe and down your neck.

You sighed weakly into the air and let your eyes fall shut, thighs attempting to tighten around him, but his grip was like iron as he kept your thighs in place. Then his lips were gone, and you opened your eyes to see that he was too. You looked down to find him knelt between your legs. “Thirsty?” you teased, and he grinned up at you, black pupils taking up almost all of his iris’.

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” he pushed the material of the dress up your legs and nuzzled his nose into your mound. “I do love you in a summer dress,” he murmured, and you could feel the vibrations from his baritone.

Dutch chuckled at your feeble attempt of pushing your hips closer to him, not relenting with his grip.

“Don’t worry sweet girl, I don’t have it in me to tease you right now.”

There was no time to answer before his mouth was on you, pressing over the wet material of your underwear. Dutch licked up your slit, tangling his tongue with the fabric and you whined, placing your hands behind you on the cool wood of his desk.

“That’s it,” he said, taking your underwear between his teeth to move it to the side, “let me hear you.”

You glanced down at him, the infatuation plain on his face as he stared at your dripping pussy. “What happened to not teasing me?”

“This is not teasing. Do you want to see teasing?”

“Dutch,” you warned, and he could hear the seriousness filter through your playful tone.

“Not tonight,” he decided, and dived right into his favourite meal.

Dutch kissed and sucked your skin, the responsiveness of your pussy providing him with more hydration than he could manage to take in, but he appeared up for the challenge. Gentle flicks of his tongue over your clit turned into a deep drag of it over your inner walls and you gasped his name repeatedly as he thoroughly lavished you with his tongue.

Your ecstatic orgasm came around fast, and you were sure you didn’t breathe for a minute straight as he drank up all you could give him. His hands had you trapped in place so you were powerless to buck your hips and instead had to let it all go right there, and Dutch was panting when he removed his mouth from you.

“Du -”

He pulled you into a kiss by the back of your neck, using his other hand to undo his jeans and shuck them down far enough to pull out his cock and ease into your accommodating cunt.

“Good lord,” he groaned, unable to focus on kissing you as your walls tensed, begging for his cock to never leave the home it found itself nestled in. “I never,” he gripped your chin between his thumb and forefinger once he’d pulled himself together, “want to go so long without your pussy again.”

“Deal,” you kissed him, spotting the small window of opportunity while he was distracted to pull your legs from his grip and wrap them around his hips, coaxing him even further in and he let out a pained whimper.

His hands grabbed the swell of either side of your ass, experimentally offering a few slight thrusts, but the sensation was enough to drive you wild. His thick cock felt perfect, and you mused whether that was the extra limb you’d been missing all this time.

The small thrusts turned to longer, languid ones that had you whining, Dutch obsessive with the way he clung to your body and began fucking you stupid.

Nothing else mattered aside from the euphoric pleasure racing through your body, being drilled into and marked by Dutch in what you assumed was every way he could think of. Nips to your collarbones, fingertips digging into your flesh, pussy fucked so deeply the skin felt raw. You didn’t care. The two of you were together again, and as was always the case when you fell into each other’s arms, the world was right again.

“Shit,” Dutch grunted, blinking his eyes tightly as he watched himself disappear into you at a reckless pace, now not the time for tender loving. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pressing your nose against his neck and breathing in the sheen of sweat on his skin. He was being greedy, his brain chasing one thing, the only thing that mattered at that moment. “It’s like you were made for me,” he began to babble to himself, and you knew he was close, so you held your own approaching orgasm until he was ready, “you’re so perfect, s-so fucking -”

Even words began to fail him as your body overtook every one of his thoughts, and that was a sentiment you shared as he fucked you deep and you cried out Dutch, because what other words were there?

He came hard, leaking into you as he pressed his hips forward, the desk jolting with the motion and you allowed your release to finally come too. His hands searched for an anchor, landing on the small of your back as he held you to him until he was completely empty.

The air around the two of you hummed, your bodies becoming soft and pliant at the familiar comfort of having your arms wrapped around each other. Eventually, each of you inched away to get a good look at the other.

Dutch’s eyelids were heavy, lips still shining with the remnants of you, and his hair had fallen around his face. He took in the view of you too and relaxed into a content smile, leaning forward to press his lips to yours, a tender act considering how hard he’d just defiled you. Neither of you had anything to say that would surmount the feelings you were experiencing in that moment.

So, you remained silent, breathing in one another until you were finally ready to face him pulling out.

As he tidied himself up, you leaned back on his desk and glanced to the side of his desk, noticing a picture frame. You took it in your hands and laughed minimally at the subject of the photo. “I can’t believe you have a picture of me here but not John.”

Despite the situation, Dutch'd made sure you get a photo with you at your graduation, you not realising he’d intended for it to take pride of place on his (now tainted) desk.

“I look better in this photo,” he said matter-of-factly. His expression softened when you raised your brows in questioning. “Or, perhaps you just make me look good.”

You shook your head, for him to shrug himself of judgement and join you in admiring the photo after he’d planted a kiss on your forehead.

It was true; you did look good together.

You’d intended to only stay at Dutch’s for a few days but found yourself not wanting to leave his side. In the end, you’d gone home for a single night to grab more stuff and made your way back to him first thing the next morning.

The day finally came when Abigail and John returned, and you watched them from the window as they made their way up the driveway, a carrier in hand. Dutch’d been fretting about the nursery – which the blue spare room had been turned into, and you were glad you hadn’t needed to part with ‘your’ room even if you did stay in Dutch’s - and whether it had everything it needed, despite already buying far too much stuff. Little Jack was surely going to be spoilt.

While you were overjoyed to get to spend so much time with the baby, Abigail and John were also happy to have you and Dutch on hand to take over when they needed a break, you ended up returning home for a time after being there for a couple of weeks, the start date at your new job just around the corner.

Since you spent the majority of your time working from home, it didn’t matter whether you stayed at your house or Dutch’s. Not wanting to rush too much into your relationship, or crowd the new family under the roof, you and Dutch agreed to a few nights a week at his place, then you'd spend the rest of it at yours. That didn’t mean he wouldn’t attempt to convince you to stay one extra night every time you had to leave, though.

Being around John while staying with his father had been awkward at first. But soon, as with all change, it became the new normal. It was nice, really, having him and Abigail so close by. It hadn’t taken long for Jack to become your favourite member of the family.

It was a few months down the line, and the Van der Linde house was full. John had worked through his nerves, but having family on hand, he’d begun taking fatherhood in his stride. He’d been grateful for you too, and you couldn’t deny that you were secretly pleased about having the advantage of the chance to be Jack’s favourite Auntie, aside from Tilly of course.

You were all in the garden after Dutch’d done a small barbeque, you stood by the table bobbing little Jack in your arms. “I do love being an auntie,” you expressed to the group, infatuated with the baby’s gorgeous cheeks.

Abigail turned to you; her face pensive. “Wouldn’t you be his step-grandma?”

Not that you’d expected anything less, but even Abigail had taken to the now-popular hobby of teasing you. Somehow, even Dutch had gotten in on the action. He snickered, John’s laugh echoing from the kitchen (his selective hearing was truly a wonder) before he walked outside and gave Abigail a proud kiss on the head.

“Isn’t your momma just the funniest?” you said down to Jack, after taking an offended pause.

She grinned at you, and you couldn’t help but return the smile.

Eventually, you’d parted with your nephew (no, he was not your step-grandson no matter what anyone said) and began taking the plates into the kitchen, loading them up into the dishwasher.

Dutch seized the opportunity to pat your ass as you were bent down, and you scoffed at him. “Perv.”

He laughed easily, bringing in the cutlery and loading it in himself. After you’d turned on the washing machine, you both took to watching the small family through the window, sitting on a mat on the grass and marvelling at Jack who’d recently learnt how to roll over.

“Now that kid will be a genius,” hummed Dutch, and you tutted at him.

“Will you leave the poor boy alone before you start locking him up with the books?”

Dutch ran his hands around your waist, holding you comfortably from behind, his warm and inviting torso a perfect cushion for your back. “I’ve half a mind to lock you up.”

“Oh, I’m sorry – do I not allocate enough time to you?” you quipped, and he chuckled into your hair.

“Not nearly enough to satiate me.”

You tsked through your teeth, resting your hands on top of his.

“I’m serious,” he added, and you glanced round to catch his eye.

“Oh, come on, what now?”

“I’ve been thinking...”

“I’ve learnt to view that sentence as a warning.”

Dutch’s eyes crinkled with his amusement, and he placed a kiss on your temple. “All I’m saying is I would love to have you here permanently. I say it not as a demand, not for something to do right now, but something to let brew in that wonderful mind of yours.”

“And you say I’m the one always jumping to the next step,” you kissed him sweetly, and he tightened his hold around you as you looked back out the window.

“It’s a mere suggestion, darlin’. Something for you to ponder when you find yourself bored.”

All you could do was smirk, this irrevocably charming man always willing to prove his need to have, which you’d deduced was just another name for a more potent form of desire; a thing he seemed to have in bucket-loads for you. You rested your head back against him, revelling in the promise of comfort and belonging that kept you company whenever you found yourself in his arms.

“Whatever you say, Mr Van der Linde.”

a/n: hopefully none of you need the reminder but pls don't fuck your best friend's dad, author does not condone it. also I know Dutch would probably be an absolute nightmare on weed given his paranoia, but in this universe that’s not a thing because I don't want it to be :)

#dutch van der linde x reader #dutch van der linde x f!reader #dutch x reader #dutch van der linde #rdr2 fanfic #rdr2 #fanfiction #my stuff

89 notes · View notes

cmtcahrule · 8 months

Text

No Words. Part 1.

For those of you who can't or won't watch.

Yes, we were living in Cayman the last three years. We went back to LA for the summer. And everywhere for the summer.

Island life has been grand…it’s just time to wrap it up and get back to reality.

It’s Swiss Family Robinson here.

But you have the LA itch? Yes, I have the LA itch.

We can always find any way to justify anything. Mom needs to go back and you guys are going to be happy wherever you are.

Oprah’s been my idol my whole life.

Modeling is so interesting. You don’t have an opinion or a voice. As with TV, you can drive it.

I never enjoyed doing the red carpets. I leave that type of journalism up to you.

Did you ever think you should be the person on the other side….like the person walking the carpet? Honestly when I was in college, there was an acting job that came through the modeling agency, but I have never wanted to be an actor. I don’t understand this. Why are we sitting in trailers for 12 hours when we could be really productive? It didn’t make sense for me to be distracted (by acting).

I thought I was going to wait to open the bakery until after I did The Today Show for 10 years. Thank God I did not wait until I was 55 or 60 to do it. Because you cannot pull 4-5 all nighters per week when you are that age.

I can contribute my television career and success to 30% talent and 70% bribery. I would go in and bomb an audition and come back with Monster Cookies and then I would get a call back because of the cookies.

In my 20s, when I wasn’t raging, I would come back home and bake dozens of cookies.

I am passionate about JIF peanut butter. I am passionate about Helmann’s Mayonnaise. We are not fucking around with these products. We have integrity.

We have been in talks to open up in LA. Talks to open up at The Grove. The Palisades Village. Maybe we will do that when I have more bandwidth some day but right now I am tapped out.

You are managing all of these businesses from afar? I mean I am on an airplane every few weeks.

I told my agent to give me anything except anything related to pop culture. Everyone is voodoo dolling you right now. That is the dream of so many girls and people wanted you to do it and you said no. Give me a war instead. I will volunteer to go cover a human rights foundation before I will go on a red carpet.

Did you meet your ex husband Armie in the industry from doing industry interviews? He was not even working at the time. He wanted to be an actor but he was not doing the things to be an actor.

Regarding Tyler: He would never hang out with me because he was with his best friend Armie.

We met through our mutual friend Tyler. It was love at first sight. For sure.

Regarding their meeting: It was good for Armie because he had to work for something.

Ambition is important. I know you want to do something so do something. Either go back to college or go to acting class. I am not interested in someone who is complacent.

I think it was hard for him at the time because I had a boyfriend who was very successful and doing a lot which is the hottest thing to me because I love ambition.

It was a good motivator. So you motivated him to get his ass up and work….as Kim Kardashian would say?

Since he was with you when you were opening up BB, was he supportive and was he helpful? Because he was so young, he probably had even less of an idea on what to do. He wasn’t the business man behind the operation to say the least.

I’ve always been an independent person who does what I want. If I am with somebody, that is how things are going to go. I do whatever I want when I want however I want.

youtube

#Youtube

60 notes · View notes

jpitha · 1 year

Text

Just a Little Further 40 - epilogue

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39

The playback ends. A woman leans over her large metal desk and takes the device, putting it in a strong metal case. It closes with a satisfying click. The woman pressed a button on her desk and the lights in the room dimmed.

"From here on out, this interview is being recorded in a full sensorium. Audio, visual, tactile and spatial recordings are being made. State your legal name and confirm your consent."

"I, Gord Beaverbrook, consent to the recording."

"Are you known by any aliases?"

"None that haven't already passed the Statute of Limitations."

"Thank you Gord, Interview commences." She makes a note on a pad and looks up at Gord. "The recording you heard was a compiled diary from Empress Melody Mullen that started as she departed on FarReach and ended right before she linked over to Sol." The woman busied herself locking the case as she spoke. "Melody's diary coupled with some interviews from residents of the Reach give us a pretty complete view of Melody's time as Empress.

The woman takes out a complicated looking key and opens a drawer in the desk. She puts the case in a drawer, closes and locks it, then turns back to the man in the chair. "You're up to date now. You know what we know. You went out to see her right before the invasion. Anything you care to add?"

Gord leans back and runs his hands through his sandy blond hair. "You should have seen the place Meg, there were 13 million people on that Starbase. They all were happy, healthy, living their lives, loving their Empress."

"And yet, the AI coalition unilaterally decided to assassinate her and remove her from the Sol system by any means necessary. From what I understand, after the anti-nanite gas was deployed you additionally destroyed sixteen Calamity Class super Dreadnoughts." Meg raises an eyebrow.

Meghan Felasheer was the current head of Intelligence for the Outer Planet Alliance. Officially, the OPA is a loose federation of Orbitals, Starbases and scientific research stations and each handles their own day to day operation. But, since first Venus and then Melody started to expand, they have condensed into a much more coherent polity.

With that condensation comes agencies and authorities to help with the operation of said polity. Meghan is the output of this natural process. She does not like her job. Meghan would much rather garden or work in environmental processing or join the Fire Brigade or do anything other than what she's doing now. Still, needs must.

Gord sighs and looks at Meg. This interview was demanded by the OPA after the last of Melody's ships were destroyed and Reach of the Might of Vzzx was linked to Sol. Relations between the AIs and BIs are... strained right now. "Meg, do you know what happened when we recaptured Venus? When we retook Luna?"

"No Gord, tell me what happened when the AIs captured Venus and Luna?" She pointedly did not say 'recaptured.'

"The same thing that happened at every place we took back. They begged us for her return Meg. Begged us." Gord looks haunted. "We had to tell them all the Builders were dead and were never coming back. Meg, there were riots. We quelled the riots and-" Gord sighed. "-lots of innocent people died that didn't have to."

Meghan stares stonily at Gord. "My name is Meghan, Gord." She was on Luna when Melody came. She saw her Empress in person.

Melody's super dreadnoughts caught everyone completely by surprise. Her fleet linked in near Venus, and after a very nominal defense mounted by some tired orbital rear guard, they almost immediately surrendered. Venus was on the brink of starvation anyway, and the Emperor's inner circle saw in Melody a chance of survival. The Emperor suffered an "unfortunate accident" and Melody was contacted. The Emperor was cold and forgotten before Melody even landed in Regantown.

The King is dead, long live the King.

The Mercury Array went just as easily. She didn't even send the whole fleet. Two of her Calamity Class super dreadnoughts linked in near the main offices of the Array and they surrendered. Their first request? Fresh water. Venus hadn't delivered any in months and their recyclers were nearly spent. Everyone had spent the last 4 months there drinking metallic tasting water.

Empress Melody immediately rendered aid. A group of her Builders went down to the array and replaced their water recyclers and brought them gigaliters of water.

Melody spent a month around Venus, visiting all the Floating Cities, using her Voice on the administrators - never the populace - and explaining that they were there to help and give aid however they could. She brought over more Builders and they worked to shore up the cities and make sure all systems were working as they should.

She was loved. She did things their previous Emperor never did. She visited, she spoke with people, she listened.

Only once she was convinced the Floating Cities were in good hands did she set her sites on the domed cities of Luna.

Once again, the moment her fleet linked in, everyone surrendered. Anyone was better than the Venusians, and Melody was gaining a reputation as a just and caring ruler in Sol.

Just like before, she visited all the locations, made a speech, used her voice on the Administrators only and... fixed their problems. Meghan was in the crowd for a speech in the domed city Armstrong. Melody was... radiant. Beautiful, with golden wings and a golden crown, she stood there with her wife Ava and told everyone that things were going to change. Melody would take care of them. She would make sure they weren't forgotten. For people too used to only hearing about what was going on with K'lax and the Independent Starbases and Colony worlds, hearing Melody tell them she was there for them and would look after them? That was worth loyalty to their new Empress.

Earth... was another story.

Earth was very used to people coming to power, making grand proclamations about who was in charge of what and what would or would not change when Empress Melody was in charge. Earth fought back.

It was a bloodbath.

Earth, the Lagrange Orbitals and the stations in LEO formed an uneasy alliance and worked to repel the invaders. Forces that normally were against Venus pivoted immediately to Melody's forces. Being the cradle of Humanity, Earth had people and resources to spare, and they threw them at Melody's empire.

It was then, that everyone saw what Melody's forces would do when pressed. They would hammer an Orbital until it surrendered, then come aboard and Voice everyone - not just the administrators - explain what was happening, that they were in charge and would move on to the next. Empress Melody accepted no compromise, no power sharing, nothing. It would be Empress Melody, or destruction.

Some Orbitals capitulated when this was learned, and some... chose destruction.

With Low Earth Orbit and the Lagrange points captured, Melody gave the planetary forces another change to surrender before orbital bombardment would commence. The deadline passed, and her terrifying Calamity Class super Dreadnoughts Began their work.

The bombardment went on for only two days before Earth surrendered. Millions perished. This time, due to the size and population, Melody did not personally go down and use her Voice. 3 dreadnoughts were left in orbit as a reminder and she continued on. She had planned on coming back after the rest of Sol was captured.

Melody and her fleet and then linked near to Mars and opened a dialog with the OPA. Everyone was tired of war, frightened of Melody or both, and here she comes, fresh off of a successful devastating attack on Earth, the home of Humanity itself.

The OPA was prepared to offer her nominal control as well as recognition and taxes in exchange for safety and support. Everyone was getting ready to sign a treaty.

Then, the AIs came.

Over fifty Starjumpers and easily that many ancillary craft linked in over Mars and immediately starting attacking Melody's new super dreadnoughts. There was no radio contact, no demands of surrender.

If Melody had more ships, she would have won.

As it was, the AIs took terrible losses. Melody's Calamity Class super Dreadnoughts were deadly. They had the power to take on two Starjumpers at once and hold their own.

Centimeter by centimeter the AIs pushed Melody's forces back. The sky behind them littered with the burnt out hulks of Starjumpers and Calamity Class super Dreadnoughts.

It was then that the everyone learned that the AIs had personal wormhole generators. It was long rumored, but the AIs had swore up and down that even though their bodies were powered by the same kind of reactor as their ships that "a personal wormhole generator is a fantasy. Nobody can shrink them down that far."

It was a lie.

The AI troopers would link into Melody's ships and release their anti-nanite gas and link away, without firing a shot.

When people learned about the anti-nanite gas they were horrified.

It was assumed by the Venus, Luna, the OPA and others that the Nanites were sapient. Melody agreed with them and had said how she was treating her Nanites as if they were sapient almost from the beginning. The AIs seemingly didn't care.

The AI's learned about the Nanites from FarReach. Her air was filled with Builder nanomachines. Upon her return, AIs scientists were able to collect, reverse engineer, and develop a disassembly command for them. As they released their anti-nanite gas, the nanites would take themselves apart.

The Builders, who received their augmentations as a result of the Nanites died almost immediately after the gas was released.

As the Builders died, Melody's war of conquest died as well.

Melody fell back, first to Luna, then to Venus and finally back to Reach of the Might of Vzzx, each time inflicting terrible losses on the AIs, but all the while, she was being slowly taken apart by the anti-nanite gas. The AIs had the upper hand now, all they had to do was wait her out.

Six months to the day after she had launched her attack she was killed.

A group of AIs linked into the Reach from a Starjumper that was light-years out of sight, a surprise attack. They released their gas in key locations around the Reach and into the environmental systems.

After a day, they AIs came back with their Starjumper and strode in. The AIs confirmed that Empress Melody Mullen and her wife Ava Williams died in the bath, in her Palace, on Reach of the Might of Vzzx.

With the death of the Builders, and the anti-nanite gas ensuring no more would be created, the AIs had to decide what to do with Reach of the Might of Vzzx. Starjumpers were strapped to the outside, and it, along with the Heinlein and Besmara Shipyards, were linked back to the Sol system. Over AI objections, the OPA took the Reach for their own, and worked with the residents to shore up the Builder systems and install systems that would work without Builder control.

In the Sol system, the AIs were not seen as the rescuing liberators they thought they would be seen as. Everywhere they went, the AIs were asked why was the Empire being destroyed, why were they persecuting Melody, why were they trying to prevent the people from getting the help they need.

Gord looks at Meghan. "Meghan, you have to understand. Melody was too dangerous."

Meghan stared at Gord.

"She was nice, yes, and she took care of her people, yes and the Reach was frankly an amazing place, and we will even admit that she was helping people in Sol, but her power... it was too much."

Meghan stared at Gord.

"All that had to happen was for the next Empress not be as kind or loving as Melody, and you would have been under her heel, forever."

Meghan stared at Gord.

Gord's face screws into a snarl. "We were looking out for all of you! Melody's power was too much. Nobody should be able to give orders that can't be disobeyed. Humanity should not be under the rule of a single person! Did you see Earth? Earth said no and she glassed at least three cities! I know what it looks like." Gord sighed. "Meghan we-"

"Enough." Meghan holds up her hand. "Gord. Who is the leader of the AIs."

Gord looks confused. "We don't have one. We're not a nation."

"Under what banner did the AIs band together to destroy Melody's empire?"

"None. We came together as a group and decided to act."

"Who speaks for the AIs? If not you, then why did you accept our summons?"

Gord crosses his arms. "I am not in charge of the AIs. I'm old. Most AIs respect me and listen to me."

Meghan turns and looks out the window of her office out onto Hyacinth. She looks out at the people walking below, going to work, living their lives, trying to get on without their Empress. She turns back.

Meghan looks through Gord. Her eyes flick and she meets his gaze. "Gord, Do you know what this looks like to us? I mean, really? It looks like you forced us to trade one tyrant who cared about her people, who worked very hard to make sure everyone had what they needed and were taken care of for a different tyrant who only wanted to keep the status quo. You never once asked us if this was what we wanted. You didn't ask, because you were afraid of the answer." As she speaks, Gord looks away.

Meghan looked down at her pad, and flicked to another page. "Gord, do you know what's happening on K'lax?"

Gord looks back and blinks. "No, wha-"

Meghan slams her pad down on the desk. "There's a holy war going on at K'lax right now Gord. The Pro-Empress faction is fighting the Anti-Empress faction. Reports coming back to us are saying it's quite bloody. Both sides have requested human help. There are also reports that the Anti-Empress faction is receiving AI help."

"Gord throws up his hands. "Meghan, we did what we had to do. Even if you don't believe me, even if humanity never believes us, know that we think - no, we know that we are right. We are better off without the Builders, without the Nanites and without Empress Melody and her Voice."

Megan looked at Gord for much longer than was comfortable. Finally, she nodded to herself. She opened a desk drawer and took out a folio. Opening it carefully, she took a paper printout and handed it to Gord.

"What's this?"

"It's an edict. Note the signatories. OPA, High Mars, Luna, and the provisional Venusian government. Due to the 'unfortunate' actions taken by the AI faction against the Empress Melody and her Builders, the AI faction is hereby banned from the Sol system until further notice. Any current AI residents who wish to stay may remain behind, but all Colonial AIs will vacate."

Gord leaned back as if he was slapped. "What?" he whispered. "What about Earth?"

"Earth was not consulted. If they wish to coordinate action they will need to go through Luna. You are no longer welcome in Sol. You took it upon yourselves to remove someone you felt was a danger to you. This is the price you pay for your unilateral actions."

Meghan turned and faced the window. "You and all Colonial AIs within the system have twelve hours to vacate Sol. Any remaining Colonial AI ships will be fired upon by the nearest OPA ship." Turned back and faced Gord. "This interview has finished. The sensorium recording shall be encrypted and uploaded to all relevant parties and shall be seen as binding." She pressed a button on her desk and the lights in the room came up.

Gord stood. There was nothing else to do. "You'll be back. When you're over your snit, and realize we are right and you want to talk again, reach out. We'll be waiting." Without another word, he turned and walked out of the office. The door closed behind him with a soft click.

"Hail Empress Melody the First." A single tear fell from Meghan's cheek, and splashed onto her lap.

Meghan picked up her pad, and quickly sent out a message. From a location on the other side of Hyacinth, a beacon linked away.

Gord strode across the quad of the OPA Administrative offices towards the docking ring. He contacted his ship. "Hat" he said tersely. "We're being kicked out. You scan any friends who need a ride here?"

"Kicked out? I.. No Gord, it's just us."

"Good. Let's delta before they decide to make 12 hours 6."

Gord walked aboard his friend Medicine Hat. He climbed into the old familiar interior and cast his eye around. All around him were mementos of his travels and especially of Canada, where he originally from. Canada, like most countries on Earth is long gone, but he keeps her memory alive.

Gord looks down at a console. "Any AI ships in system? We need to let them know they gotta boogie before the OPA opens fire." He sent a digital copy of the edict to Hat who whistled low when he read it.

"Gord, they're kicking us out? We're being targeted by 3 separate ships. They are all flying OPA colors. Weapons aren't hot, but they're using active pings. They want us to know they see us."

Gord narrows his eyes. They aren't playing. "Colonial AIs are no longer welcome in Sol, yes."

"But... we saved them."

Gord sat in his command chair. It was overstuffed and soft and upholstered in flannel. "They don't see it that way, friend. We acted too late it looks like. Earth understood what was at stake, but the former Venusian territories just saw a nicer version of what they had already."

"I mean, I didn't expect a ticker-tape parade when we were done, but this? This feels too much. What about AI residents? I admit there weren't too many who stayed in Sol after Venus and everything, but there were some."

"They accounted for that. Any permanent AI residents are allowed to stay with full rights and privileges. They just want the 'interlopers' out." Gord sounded sad and bitter when he was explaining to Hat. "Let any of them that we still have numbers for know that heading to Earth is probably a smart idea right now. FarReach really scared us with her report. When I went out, I was concerned but, not really like, worried until she tried to use her Voice on me."

"You said it didn't work though."

"It didn't stick is what I said. It worked for about six hours. Long enough for her to convince me that everything was fine and for us to trade some maple for some tea and for me to leave. I came to my senses right after I linked home. By the time I gave my report, she had linked to Venus and begun. She must have realized it didn't work and that if she didn't go right then we were going to assassinate her."

"But, we weren't going to assassinate her Gord, right?"

Gord sits in the chair, and starts sending the edict to AI ships in system, letting them know it's time to go.

"Gord?"

Gord sighs and leans his head back, staring at the ceiling. "No, she was completely right Hat, that's the bitch of it. We would have had to assassinate her. This was the only way it was going to go down. Our only hope was that we would have to deal with a broken Reach of the Might of Vzzx, but we were too slow. Earth said no, and she started glassing cities. She wasn't going to take any other answer than "All Hail Empress Melody."

"Well what now then Gord? You're still legally a resident of Earth."

Gord sighed. "I am, but I can't say I'm too... excited about the thought of hanging around here right now. We'll obey the edict for now. Let's link to Meíhuā. We haven't been there in a while, I bet some folks will want some maple syrup."

Medicine Hat sighed. "You got it Gord."

****

Near Venus, a message beacon appeared, beamed a message and then destroyed itself. The report was decrypted and read under Regantown.

"Hyacinth reporting."

"And?"

"The edict has been delivered. Gord and the AIs are leaving Sol now."

"Do they suspect anything?"

"No, Helen. Melody's plan worked completely."

Helen Raaden wiped a tear from her eye. "She should have hid with us. She did not need to sacrifice herself."

"She needed it to work Helen. She knew that her body was going to be the only thing that satisfied the AI faction." Um'reli looked up from her chair in the Command Deck of the Lavinia. "the AIs have been given 12 hours to vacate."

Helen leaned back in her chair, exasperated. "I still don't see why it has to be me."

"It was Melody's last wish. She said you would be best able to lead after her."

"We can't be the only Builders left though, can we?"

"You know we are Helen. Omar died when our Dreadnought was caught in the firefight early on over High Mars and the others perished as the anti-nanite gas tore through them. Frankly, I'm surprised that the Reach survived at all." Um'reli sniffs and wipes a tear at the memory. She was onboard Raaden's ship when her ship was taken by surprise and destroyed by the AIs.

Grand Admiral Helen Raaden sighed. "I'm glad it did. If the AI faction had murdered the 13 million people on the Reach, especially all those different sapients who live nowhere else it would have been unforgivable. As it is, everyone in Sol is not a fan of the AIs right now."

Um'reli looked up at her. "What about Earth and the colony worlds?"

"We heard from Parvati and Meíhuā before things fell apart. They had officially recognized the rule of Empress Melody in Sol so long as she wasn't planning on visiting. I can only assume they'll recognize the rule of the next Empress. As for Earth...We'll take care of Earth this time. Did anyone ever hear from K'lax?"

Um'reli's ears flicked frustration. "I heard that there's some kind of civil war going on. The Pro Melody faction against the Anti Melody faction." She turned away. "It's rough right now. She got up from her chair and walked over to Helen. She put her small hand on her shoulder. "I wish Melody was here."

Helen reached up and squeezed her hand on her shoulder. "I know. Me too."

"This won't be as easy as it was the first time."

Helen shrugged. "It will and it won't. We don't have the firepower to back up the words, but most everyone in Sol liked Melody. They'll see us - me - as an extension of that rule. I think it'll work." Helen looked up to the navigation officer. "Take us down. Use the coordinates the Empress gave us."

"Aye, Grand Admiral."

The Vengeance of Lavinia II detached from underneath Regantown where it was hiding and sank into the thick, heavy atmosphere of Venus. As it went lower and lower, the huge Calamity Class super Dreadnought creaked and moaned in protest to the higher pressures. She was well built though, and the atmospheric control surfaces aided in control.

A few hours later they were above the location given to them by Melody before she and Ava linked back to the Reach for their final stand. Slowly the massive ship settled lower and lower until it touched the hot surface of Venus.

"Contact, Grand Admiral. We're down."

Helen nodded. "Thank you. We'll suit up and walk to the coordinates." Um'reli stood from her station and looked at Helen, who also stood to leave.

An Engineering officer looked up. "Please make haste Grand Admiral. We can only stay at this depth for a few hours before we start to take damage."

Helen and Um'reli suited up in special high pressure suits. The Venusians were familiar with going to the surface, and their designs were well tested and safe. Um'reli's suit had to be tweaked a bit for her K'laxi frame, but she was able to work with the printer team to get it fitted. They completed checks and cycled the airlock.

The surface of Venus is intense.

Dark, rocky and windy, it was difficult going even in their suits. After 10 minutes of hiking, they found the wreckage.

Helen and Um'reli looked over the pile of twisted metal towering over them that Melody's coordinates led to.

"This is a Gate?" Helen sounded exasperated over the radio link.

"Melody says it's the Sol Gate. It showed up in her Gate census, so she says it still has power."

"Ugh. Okay then." Helen looked around and saw what could charitably be called the remains of a doorway. "I guess... we'll go in and look."

As they walked in, the howling wind of the Venusian surface quieted. It was still incredibly hot, but at least they didn't have to lean into the wind now.

Um'reli reached out with her Nanites. The feelings she got were very faint but... "I think I can feel it Helen. Try reaching out."

Helen reached out as well and... there, over in the corner. "Yes, I feel it too Um'reli."

They walked over to the corner that they felt, and laying on it's side, with corners chipped but otherwise intact was a directory stone.

Helen looked over at Um'reli "What do I do?"

Um'reli flicked her years in worry, but that was hidden by her helmet. "Melody said to just touch it, and the Nanites will do the rest."

"Well, here goes nothing then." Helen reached out, and with an armored glove, touched the directory stone. There was no flash, no dramatic lighting, no noise, just...

Hi Helen! I'm so glad you made it!

Melody? Aren't you dead?

Yes, I am. But I am also the memory of her that was recorded by the Nanites and uploaded. As long as there is an Empress, I will never truly die. And now, neither will you...

Helen came to on the floor with Um'reli shaking her. "Helen! You gotta get up. I can't carry you myself. It's time to go!"

Helen put an arm up to stop Um'reli. "Ugh. Okay, I'm up, I'm up." She sat up. "How long was I out?

"30 seconds maybe? It wasn't long. You touched the stone and threw your head back and fell over. What happened?"

"I... I talked to Melody, or the memory of her, or something. She said that the Nanites record memories and pass them on to future Empresses."

"So that's it then? You're Empress?"

Helen stood. She - at the same time - felt like herself and also felt different than before.

Oh you're taking to this much easier than Melody did. Good work. She was right, you'll be a great Empress.

She turned to Um'reli. "Yes, I am Empress."

Um'reli bowed low. "Empress. Welcome back."

Helen looked down at Um'reli and for a moment, her perception was felt... down time across as She looked at her subject. This was right. This was how it was supposed to be. Empress Helen Raaden nodded.

L̵̠̖͗ḛ̵̥̟͇̣̟̪̐͌͛̇̐̿͛̀͐̍̈́̽͂̐̌͠͝ͅt̷̬̞͎̱̞̤̯͓͖̭̺͛̅́̓'̷̨̧̞̖̯̏̀̈́̈́s̷̡̢͕̥̦̤̯̜̫̱̰̱͉͚̆̈́́̓͋̈́͂̏͋̏́̃͒̀͘͠͝ ̸̰̲͈̥͚̥̼̤̱̃̒̀͜g̸̨̪͍̱͇̤̰̼͚̰̬͖̪̝̦͑̈́̂̀̾͋̅̎̄̊̍́̑̌̃͛͝o̴͈͓̱̪̬̞̊͊̑̂̚.̵̡̢̠͙̰̘̫̗̾̈́̐͒̀́͋̃̂̕̕͘͝

And that's it! Thanks so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing. This was a real challenge for me, it was my first time writing long form first person, my first time trying out a YA-ish style of story and my first Villain Perspective.

So yes, Word Of Author, Melody was not the Hero. She thought she was, and she surrounded herself with people that thought she was too. By only (deliberately) including her POV it was tough to tell.

Like at the end of HD, I'm going to take a week or two to rest, and compile this into a single doc and do some first pass editing. The writing really is the fun part, all that other stuff after is less so. Someone needs to hire me a team of editors to take care of that part! :D

I have a few ideas for the next one too. I liked how most of JALF took place only in one location, I might try and narrow focus down even further. Maybe in a single city or something, give it a real cyberpunk vibe. My universe is large enough that there can be all kinds of different settings available to play in.

Thanks again for reading!

#humans are deathworlders #humans are space orcs #humans go on adventure #humans are space oddities #sci fi writing #writing #humans and ai #humans and aliens #the k'laxiverse #jpitha #just a little further

140 notes · View notes

ageofbajabule · 10 months

Text

Roommates | Chapter 5

picture creds to samsfallingsky on ig.

Danny x F! Reader

Word Count: Roughly 5.3k

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Mentions of cheating, some Violence, Alcohol

If you haven’t read part 4

If you want to join my taglist fill this form out🫶🏻

Author’s Note: Hello everyone!! Chapter 5 is finally here! I’m so sorry for the delay! And I hope you all enjoy this, and Roommates is soon coming to an end…🥹🩵

Her POV

After shutting the door you sat on the couch crying to yourself after hearing Danny say that. You had thought he had changed, but you were proven wrong again. Would he ever change? Or would he constantly give you the hot and cold effect.

Who cares, you’re here to work. Not to make a relationship work, this should strictly be professional. But you couldn’t help but think at the idea of being with Danny. Sure he was an asshole, but deep down you knew the real Danny was in there somewhere buried and asking for help. But how would you get that Danny back?

Danny’s POV

Once you heard the door click shut you knew you were done for. She had heard what you said, but it wasn’t true… She wasn’t a quick fuck. She was more than that, but she wouldn’t believe a word out of you now.

“So, Texas is next up?” You asked Sam, “Yeah, Fort Worth. It’s like a 9 hour drive I think. So plenty of sleep on the bus.” He chuckled softly, walking Rose to the tour bus. “Yeah…” You sighed softly stepping onto the tour bus. You shuffled your way to your bunk bed, placing your shoes by the small table on the bus. You slid into your bunk, closing the curtain getting under the blankets letting sleep overcome you.

Her POV

You finished making sure everything was stored away, before heading onto your tour bus with some of the crew immediately going to bed.

The drive to the next state was a bit bumpy. Considering you’ve never really been on a tour bus before. But you also didn’t sleep much after hearing those words from Danny. After all if he truly thought you were a quick fuck, you could always talk to Gabe. Since he wouldn’t leave you alone last night, two can play at that game.

If there was one thing you could do, it was to piss Danny off. And what better than to piss him off with some guy you truly weren’t interested in.

The buses had rolled up to the hotel, you had gathered your things making way into the main lobby. Communicating with the receptionist on getting everyone’s room keys ready.

The guys had come stumbling into the hotel, groggy and sleepy. “Morning guys.” You smiled softly at them, as you gathered their room keys. “So we have two days off until the show. I know today you guys have free will to do whatever your heart desires. But I do know there is dinner tonight with the crew and everyone. Then tomorrow you guys have an interview in the morning, and a small photoshoot in the afternoon. Soundcheck will be the morning of the show as usual.”

The guys had all nodded. “Great work Y/N! I don't think we've ever had a more prepared worker.” Jake had chuckled lightly, smiling at you. “I’m just doing my job. And don’t want to mess anything up.” You laughed lightly, seeing Danny steal a glance at you. You looked away for a moment. “Uh, so here are your guy’s keys to your rooms. You are all on the same floor, it should be like that for this whole tour, and then I will be in a room at the end of the hall.” You passed each of them their room keys.

Once you got to Danny you handed it to him slowly then turned away. “I’m sure you guys want to freshen up and such before heading out for the day. There is a zoo that I figured everyone would probably like to check out then. So, once you’re all ready just text the group chat and we’ll meet up in the lobby.” You smiled softly, “Oh I hope this zoo has penguins!” Josh said excitedly. You giggled softly, smiling at him. “I’m sure they do, but for now I’m gonna go freshen up.” You parted ways from the guys.

As you walked away with your bag, you felt like a set of eyes were burning through you. And sure enough when you entered the elevator, as you turned around you caught Danny staring. You looked off to the side, pressing the button on the elevator to take you to your floor.

➳

It was around 3 in the afternoon. The guys had messaged the group chat that they were ready to head to the zoo. In which everyone met in the lobby. Josh is wearing a brown jumpsuit with his new society symbol. Along with Jake wearing his go to button up shirt, with very few buttons buttoned, and a pair of worn jeans. Sam wore a very mismatched outfit, and Danny opted to wear black jeans and a yellow muscle tee. You couldn’t help but look at him, he was still undeniably attractive even after what he said to you…

“Ready to go?” You smiled at them, they all nodded piling into the van. You opted in sitting between Jake and Josh, letting Danny and Sam sit next to each other. You striked a conversation with the twins immediately, talking about the upcoming outfits for this tour and the ideas they had in mind.

While Danny tried to have a conversation with Sam about something back home. Danny would try to steal glances at you, but you just ignored him as much as you could by engaging in conversation with the twins more.

Once you all had arrived you exited the car, and Gabe had come to the zoo from another van with the rest of the crew. “Hey Y/N!” He had walked up to you, “Hey Gabe…” You shot a smile at him, deciding to head up to the entrance you had all paid your admission to get into the zoo. “What are you most excited to see?” You smiled while keeping a conversation going with Gabe.

“Um, I think the giraffe’s.” He chuckled softly, walking close by your side. You knew this would definitely set Danny off.

The rest of the day in the zoo was spent pretty much with Gabe, however you noticed Danny had been lingering behind the two of you with Sam beside him. You had opted to use the restroom breaking off from the group saying you’d catch up with them later.

Once you used the restroom you had come out, to find Danny waiting outside. “Hi Danny.” You said in an annoyed tone. “Y/N let me ex-“ “No Danny. There is nothing to explain. I think you’ve pretty much made it clear last night that I’m just an easy fuck.” You yelled at him, but only loud enough between the two of you.

“But you’re not!” He threw his hands up. “Really? Cause it sure as hell seemed like it? Why would you say that if you truly don’t mean it?” You put your hands on your hips. “It’s not as easy as you might think.” He sighed, rubbing his temple. “Let me guess, is it ‘Bro Code’” You looked at him, and he looked back. “You can’t be serious Daniel.”

You laughed nervously shaking your head. “Wow, really living up to the fuck boy type aren’t ya?” You walked up to him, “In case you haven’t noticed, that’s not gonna fly with me. I know you’re better than that, Josie even said so.” You scoffed walking away, feeling him pull your wrist to pull you to him.

“I can show you I’m not like the rest of them…” He held your face close to his. “Danny…” You looked down, but he tilted your chin up to face him. “Give me a chance.” He had pleading eyes. “Danny… I can’t. You’ve already hurt me so much…” You felt the tears burning your eyes. “So you would rather run to Gabe…” He scoffed, pulling away from you.

“It’s not like that Danny.” You looked at him. “Then what’s it like? Cause to me it seems like you have some sort of interest in him.” He chuckled, “Gabe is just a friend. Nothing more. I don’t even find him-“ “Find him attractive or find him interesting? It’s because you want me…” Danny pulled you to him. “Please. Give me a chance.” You pushed him away slowly, “I think you need to work on yourself before trying to make something work between us…” You sniffled, feeling your tears fall.

You felt him let go of you. “I’m sorry…” You wiped your tears walking away from him, going to an exhibit of Wolves. You found Josh looking out at them, you made yourself not look like a crying mess before clearing your throat letting Josh know you were there.

“Oh, Hi Y/N.” He smiled softly, “Hi Josh…” You stood next to him. “I’m assuming you and Daniel finished talking”, he shifted his gaze towards you. “How did-“ “It’s honestly not hard to tell when your brother is in love with someone, and they love them back…” He chuckled softly. “What is it?” He smiled softly, “I’m all ears.”

You let out a small sigh, “It’s just. One minute he is this sweet amazing guy, and then he just becomes cold… Like as if I’m nothing to him, but just another girl in his eyes?” You sat on the bench, as Josh then sat next to you.

“I’m not excusing his actions… By any means. But, Daniel has… He’s been through the ringer, with his last relationship especially.” He scratched the back of his head. “Josie didn’t particularly fill me in, not that she needs to. But Daniel just…” You put your head down.

“You remember Jasmine?” Josh put a hand on your shoulder. You looked up at him, nodding slowly. “Heard of her…” You made a half smile.

“Well, the reason Danny is the way he is. Is all because of her. She filled all these thoughts of lies into his head. Trying to make him the villain… But in the end it was all her…” He spoke softly, “Did she…” “Did she cheat? Is that what you are asking?” He looked at you, you nodded. “Yes… And tried to say that it was because he didn’t give her enough attention… That all he cared about was the music and the boys… But Danny really did balance out his every day to day life. He gave her everything he could.” He sighed softly.

You looked at Josh, “So… Danny. Has been beating himself up ever since?” Josh nodded at you, you felt your heart drop. “Josh… I.” He shook his head, “There was no way you could’ve ever known… Danny doesn’t like to talk about her. And I understand why. But… He needs to move past it.” He sighed softly, you nodded. “If you wanna know more… Maybe you should talk to Danny. I think he’s scared of loving you. As you can tell, last time didn’t go so well.”

“Come on. We should get going, we have dinner reservations tonight. And should head back to freshen up.” He stood up offering a hand for you to get up.

You took it standing up, “Thank you, Josh…” You smiled at him as he smiled, pulling you in for a hug. “Of course.” You smiled softly, hugging him tightly before letting him go.

➳

Dinner was at a secluded yet expensive restaurant. The boys insisted on dining here to have a relaxing night, and to treat their crew to a well deserved dinner as they claimed. You had opted into wearing a sleek black dress with an open back. Fitting all of your curves, and opted to wear red strappy heels to pop out the outfit.

You had went in a separate van from the guys arriving with other crew mates filing into the building as you were guided to the table you would be dining at. You heard someone clear their throat and saw Danny’s head snap up to look at you, you caught a glimpse of his eyes blushing and looking away for a mere moment to try and avoid eye contact.

Then Josh chimed in, “Y/N you can sit next to me.” You smiled softly, mentally thanking him and sat down next to him which was a couple seats away from Danny. You adjusted yourself in your seat, looking down at Danny, catching him staring at you again. You shot your eyes back to look at Jake across from you. “So Jake, did you enjoy the zoo today?” You smiled softly engaging in small talk.

“Yeah, it was nice to see so many animals.” He chuckled softly, “Although I do feel quite bad for some of them… Some should just be left in their natural habitat. But I can understand why some are there, better taken care of?” He shook his head, “Sorry I’m rambling…” You shook your head, “It’s quite alright Jake.” You smiled softly.

Gabe had taken a seat next to Jake, which you looked up at him smiling softly. “Nice of you to join us, Gabe.” He nodded, smiling at everyone. “Wouldn’t miss it.” You heard a chair move on the floor, indicating someone was getting up. You looked up to find Danny standing up and walking away, “What’s his issue?” You heard Jake ask, and Josh looked over at Sam raising his hands. “He said he had an important phone call to take.” Sam shrugged, you knew Danny didn’t have an important phone call. He was just pissed to see you interacting with Gabe.

You leaned over to whisper in Josh’s ear. “I think it’s because of Gabe…” You pulled back to see Josh nod his head and motion for you to go. You sighed softly, standing up from your seat. “Going to use the ladies room.” You smiled softly, walking away from the table making way towards the hallway of the restrooms to find Danny standing at the end of the hallway.

He in fact did have a phone call. One hand in his hair pulling it nervously, his back was facing you. He hadn’t known you were there yet. “Josie… I fucked up. I don’t know what to do.” He sighed, “I mean. I didn’t do anything to entirely fuck it up, but I just keep fucking up. And I’m trying not to.” You heard him mumble some ‘okays’ and ‘yeah’ then he finally said his goodbyes and thanked his sister before getting off the phone.

You played it off that you had just made your way to the hallway. “Danny?” You called his name just above a whisper. He turned on his heels, “Look, I’m not entirely sure it's smart for us to have another conversation. Especially after how today went…” He looked down at you.

“Well we need to have a conversation. Maybe not here, but some time and some where…” You played with your hands. “Y/N…” “Danny. Please.” You looked up at him, pulling his hand into yours. “We can’t keep doing this…” He caressed your cheek. “I want you to be happy, and I’m scared I can’t do that for you.” He looked at you with hurt in his eyes.

“Danny… I-“ He pulled you closer to him, kissing your lips softly. You wrapped your small hands around his, kissing him back softly then pulled away. “Tomorrow. We will talk. I don’t want alcohol to have an influence in any of this conversation…” He rested his forehead against yours. You nodded slowly, “Tomorrow. Breakfast after your interview?” You giggled softly. He nodded, “Sounds like a plan darling.” He kissed your forehead softly, “We should probably head back.” He chuckled and walked away first, you gave it a little bit of time then made your way back sitting next to Josh again.

“So…?” Josh leaned over to your ear. “Tomorrow he and I will talk…” You whispered back, smiling softly. He smiled softly, “See. It’ll work out.” He chuckled softly.

For the rest of dinner you kept stealing glances with Danny, shooting a smile and blushing from the small acts. After a couple glasses of wine, everyone was ready to head back to the hotel. Josh suggested you rode back with them. You had sat in the back between Danny and Sam. Sam was busy talking on the phone with his girlfriend Natalie, while the twins had their own small talk. Danny played your hand that rested on your thigh.

Intertwining your fingers together, he rubbed his thumb across your hand. You looked down at your hand then back at him, smiling softly. Then Sam had finished his phone conversation which made Danny and you slip your hands away. Your heart ached, longing to be able to show your love for him… But you understood why.

➳

Next morning came. The day was filled with two interviews in the morning. Leaving some time for the guys, before their photoshoot in the afternoon.

You had done a check-up on them making sure they were awake. You had knocked on their doors earning very quick responses that they were in fact awake and ready for the day. Lastly you had come up to Danny’s room, when he answered he was just finishing getting ready. “Morning, beautiful.” He smiled softly, “Morning…” You couldn’t stop yourself from blushing. “Just checking that you are all ready to go. Van will be here in a few minutes to take you guys over to some radio station I believe it is. For your interview as a band, and then a short one with Jake.” You smiled softly.

“Don’t forget our breakfast together then…” He smiled softly, you nodded your head. “Trust me, I didn’t forget. Could hardly sleep last night because of the nerves.” You giggled softly. He pulled you in closely to kiss your lips softly. You kissed him back, then slowly pulled away. “Listen we can’t let anybody see us until this is all figured out…” You sighed softly with a little bit of hurt. You wanted to express how you felt to Danny in front of everyone. But you wanted to make sure you heard everything before biting the bullet.

“Yeah… I’m sorry.” He put his head down scratching the back of his neck. “It's okay, I just don't want to be a secret is all.” She rubbed his cheek with her hand. He nodded, “Well I should probably head out, before I get yelled at for being late.” He chuckled softly, you nodded. Just let me know when you’re back and we’ll go for our breakfast.” You smiled softly, walking back towards your room.

➳

The early morning of the guys' events went by rather quickly. Danny had sent you a text signaling he was waiting in the hotel lobby for you. You fixed your outfit, and adjusted your hair before heading out to meet him in the lobby. That’s when you bumped into Gabe. “Oh shit, sorry…” You looked up at him apologetically. “Oh it’s alright. Hey, um did you want to go out tonight?” You looked at him and gave a light smile. “I’m sorry Gabe… Not tonight. I think the guys had made plans and asked me to join them.” They hadn’t but you needed something to go with.

“Oh, alright. Well if plans don’t turn out, I’m here.” He chuckled lightly walking away. You nodded and made way to the lobby, walking up to Danny as he waved you down. “Sorry, I bumped into Gabe on the way down here…” You sighed softly. “Is he still trying to make moves on my girl?”

You blushed at ‘my girl’, “I’m sorry, my what now?” You giggled softly. Danny wrapped his arm around your waist pulling you close. “My girl…”

“Come on lover boy, I’m starving.” You swatted his arm playfully. He chuckled following behind you. Luckily there was a breakfast joint not too far from the hotel. It was within walking distance, you both decided to sit on the little balcony outside. It was only you two seated out there.

“This is a cute little place.” You smiled softly. “Not as cute as you.” He smirked, looking over at you. You scoffed playfully, “Good one…” You shook your head giggling softly as you blushed.

“Alright. So, what do you want to know?” He opened the menu, observing it and deciding on what he wanted to order. “I want to know about her…” You looked up at him with soft eyes. He met yours, his body tensed a little bit. “What is there to know…” He closed the menu, fidgeting with the edges. “Well Josh told me the basics… But said I should talk to you more about it. I know she hurt you… And filled your head with lies…” You put your hand across the table to grab his. He pulled his hand back slowly.

“Danny…” “Y/N… She is in the past for a fucking reason.” He said through gritted teeth. “Daniel, I’m just trying to figure out why you’ve been acting like you have been towards me.” You snapped at him. “I’ve been acting towards you?” He smirked, “Yeah, you’ve been acting like an asshole!”

“I have?” You watched as Danny sucked in a breath, his eyes looked tortured. Almost as if he was having a battle within himself. “It’s not that easy to explain.” He looks at you with hurt in his eyes. “Well I’m all ears. You said we were gonna talk. So let’s talk, let me in Danny…” You sighed softly, reaching for his hand again. He sighed deeply, holding your hand in his.

“Jasmine was… She was my everything. And then… she just broke my heart and tried to say it was my fault…” He had tears forming. “But all I ever did was give her everything I had to offer… But it just wasn’t enough.” He sighed, you rubbed his hand softly with your thumb. “Danny…” “And the worst part is, she slept with the proclaimed guy she told me not to worry about…” He sniffled as tears fell.

“Tried accusing me that I was sleeping around when I was on tour, I invited her to join us all the time. But she always turned it down saying she couldn’t because of work… Even though Jita takes some time off to join Jake for a few weeks or so. And anytime I planned a nice trip together she would make a fit, and shut it down immediately. So then I would just go with the guys or play my drums figuring out different sounds and techniques for new music. And she swore up and down all I cared about was myself, the music and the guys…” He let out a small cry. “I saw a future with her, and she just tore me down… And I guess I’ve just reflected on the words she left me with and acted on it…” He looked up at you with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks.

“Danny… I’m so sorry.” You put your other hand around his, kissing it softly. “You’re not a bad guy. You’re a great guy who got his heart broken by an ungrateful bitch.” You bit your tongue. “Sorry…” “No it’s okay… she was a bitch.” He chuckled softly, “I just. Was scared I was going to hurt you. I mean, I kind of already did with being a dick towards you… And I really am sorry for that.” He looked into your eyes. You smiled softly, looking into his eyes.

“Y/N, I just… What I’m saying is.” He blushed, putting his head down. “I want you in my life… And I know I’ve been an asshole to you for the past two months going on almost 3 months. I just want to start fresh, and treat you the way you deserve.” You felt a few tears threatening to spill, “Danny… All I ever wanted was an explanation and you… Did more than that.” You sighed contently, “Danny I’ve been crazy about you ever since we first met. As silly as that sounds.” You giggled softly, and he laughed softly. “Funny thing is, I was too. Josie even told me to make a move… I was just, I don’t know.”

You smiled at him, “Josh told me that you were scared to love again. I think that’s what was holding you back… And I completely understand, after going through a breakup like that… It’s hard to come back from.” You looked into his eyes lovingly, he nodded watching you.

“So, why don’t we start fresh? I’m sure the guys would be happy that we’re not at each other's throats.” You giggled softly, “Yeah I like the sound of that.” Danny chuckled, smiling softly. “But with one exception?” You looked at Danny with a questionable look, “What exception?”

“Be mine? And only mine. I want you to be my girl. And I want you and only you…” He held both of your hands. You looked into his eyes, nodding your head. “Yes… I- I will Danny…” He smiled leaning over the table kissing your lips softly, as you kissed him back.

“Oh thank god, I thought I was going to walk out of here a lonely man…” He chuckled softly, you shot a glare. “You’re on thin ice… So I'd watch it.” You giggled softly. “I think I’ve learned from my mistakes, I don’t want to lose you…” He smiled softly.

“Alright, let’s order. I’m starving and you still have a photoshoot to attend after this.” He nodded signaling the waiter over to place your orders. “But then I have you for the rest of the day right?” He smiled at you softly, “As long as your schedule stays clear after the photoshoot, then yes.” You smirked at him. “Oh I’ll make sure it stays clear.” He chuckled softly.

➳

Breakfast with Danny was wonderful, you got to know a lot more about him and his family. Along with him learning about yours. And how the two of you lived so close to one another but never crossed paths before.

Danny insisted on you joining the guys on their photoshoot, but you wanted to stay behind and catch up on some work for tomorrow’s busy day leading into Friday.

You decided to head down to the hotel’s bar. Sitting at a small booth, texting Danny to let him know where you were when the guys came back in case they wanted to join you.

A few hours had passed and you were only 2 tequila soda’s in. It was around 6pm and Danny had sent a text signaling he would be down soon. And the guys would join later. You smiled, sending a response back, before finishing up your work and putting it away in your bag waiting for him to arrive.

You had seen Gabe walking into the hotel’s bar. You caught eye contact with him, groaning quietly to yourself. Will this guy ever get the hint? You’re clearly not interested in him. He made his way over to you, “Hey Y/N!” He smiled softly, “Hi Gabe…” You gave a half smile. “Are you alone? Mind if I join?” He smiled, “Uh, Danny is actually meeting me here soon. And the others will be joining…” You took a sip of your drink.

“Well would they mind that I join?” He smiled softly, you thought to yourself. Danny would mind, in fact it would set Danny off you thought. “Uh, sure why not.” You smiled softly, regretting letting him join. You weren’t sure how Danny would react, and of course Gabe sat next to you, and quite close actually. “So, what have you been up to?” He asked taking a sip of his beer. “Oh just finishing up some work for tomorrow’s show and Friday’s show.” You nodded, “What about you?” You tried to keep the conversation simple or to a minimum until Danny arrived.

And of course, Danny was taking a little longer. “Talking to the crew about how insane the new set up is on this tour. I mean Nashville was just an insane evening, it turned out amazing.” He chuckled softly, and you nodded. You caught Danny coming in hot out of the corner of your eye. He raised an eyebrow at you motioning towards Gabe, you gave him a defeated look while shrugging.

“Danny! So glad you joined us.” Gabe smiled at him, Danny smiled back sitting across from you, “The others will be here in the next half hour. I thought you’d be the only one here Y/N…” He said a little annoyed. “Gabe decided to join, he saw I was alone and well…” You gave Danny an apologetic look. “Can’t leave a woman alone by herself in a bar these days anymore…” Gabe chuckled softly, you felt uneasy around him. And Danny could pick up the vibes.

Gabe continued to talk about the stage techniques and set up with Danny while you chewed on the inside of your cheek, waiting for the others to join. And finally the three Kiszka boys piled in. You tapped Gabe on the shoulder, “I’m gonna get a refill, you guys want the same?” Danny and Gabe nodded. “I’ll be back.” You smiled as Gabe let you slip out, and followed behind you.

“You know… You really are beautiful…” You could hear the sultry tone to his voice making you cringe. “Gabe… We’ve already had this conversation.” You went up to the bar placing an order for everyone. “Y/N, come on. Give me a chance… So what if we work together?” He chuckled softly, grabbing at your waist. “Gabe, I said I wasn’t interested.” You shoved his hands away. “And don’t touch me.” You looked at him with angry eyes.

“Woah, hey now… No need to get angry. I’m just-“ “You were just leaving.” Danny spoke up startling Gabe. “Hey man… It’s not-“ Danny grabbed him by the shirt. “It's not what it looks like? It sure did though man. How about you leave my girl alone. And get the fuck out of here…” Danny was beyond pissed, you could see the rage in his eyes.

“Your girl…” He scoffed looking over at you. “You’ll fuck the rockstar, but not me. Fucking easy skank…” He smirked, your eyes went wide. Then Danny’s fist met Gabe’s jaw, knocking him down. “Don’t you ever call her a skank!” Danny gripped his shirt, holding him to the ground. “Come on man, I’m sure she’s an easy lay.” He chuckled, and Danny clocked him again. As the guys rushed over to pull him off of Gabe.

“Danny! We can’t cause a fucking scene in here.” Josh snapped at him, as Sam picked Gabe up walking out of the bar, Jake was checking on you making sure you were alright. “You think I’m gonna let him talk about Y/N like that?” He was angry, and looked over at you with concerning eyes. “Are you okay baby?” He walked up to you, caressing your cheek. You nodded, “I’ll be alright… I just didn’t think that would happen.” You let out a shaky breath.

“Wait, baby?” Josh and Jake looked over at the two of you. “Are we missing something here?” Jake chuckled softly, waiting for a response.

“Well, uh…” Danny smirked, looking between all of you. Sam joined the group again, “Alright he’s being sent off. Got him fired for sexual harassment… What did I miss?” He looked around. “Daniel was getting ready to fill us in on something rather important.” Josh said with a smirk.

“Oh, well what is it Daniel?” Sam questioned him.

“Y/N and I are dating…” He smiled, pulling you close to him.

to be continued…

Taglist -

@laneygvf @lyndszee @fkfearandliveyourlegend @starcatcherry

#greta van fleet #gvf #greta van smut #gvf smut #danny gvf #danny wagner x reader #danny x reader #danny greta van fleet #danny wagner

99 notes · View notes

lexosaurus · 6 months

Text

Twelve Hours: Chapter 4

Part 4 of 5 of my fic for Ecto Implosion, the DP reverse mini-bang (artists go first, writers go second)

read on: [ao3]

[see all chapters]

Characters: Danny Fenton, Harriet Chin, GIW (mentioned a lot) Tags: Identity Reveal, Flashbacks, Runaway Danny Fenton, Angst Chapter WC: 3961 Summary: When the GIW revealed Danny to the world, the only thing he could do was run. Run and run and run until he escaped to Chicago, trying desperately to disappear. Too bad it didn’t work.

****

“Although many operatives work within the Ghost Investigation Ward, you’ve been especially outspoken about one in particular. The same man we saw in the interview, actually,” Harriet said, weaving the conversation into a new topic.

He’d been expecting this, of course. Though he never connected the dots so blatantly to the public before, he’d made quite enough digs online and underhanded comments to the press that now any search related to the GIW was sure to result in at least one speculative title theorizing about Phantom’s relationship with one operative.

“Operative O,” Danny stated. “We have a history. Operative K too, even if I don’t talk about him as much.”

“And who was he to you, exactly?”

That really was the question, wasn’t it?

As much as he wanted to dodge the question just as he had done so many times before, he knew he had to metaphorically plant his feet and head straight into the incoming media shitstorm with his head held high.

At least he knew Jazz was backstage. She’d flown out for this, leaving her husband and two kids to fend for themselves in the meantime. And while he should have felt guilty for asking her to do this, overwhelmingly, he only felt relief knowing he had someone here. Danny wasn’t alone; he had someone to hold him and ward away all the darkness that was fighting to grab him with its acid-drenched claws and poison every vein in his body. Darkness that would certainly make its appearance later tonight while he was laying in bed second guessing every life decision that had led him to agree to do this interview at all. And when nightfall would come and Danny would be scrambling to call the station, begging them to please don’t air this episode, I’ll pay you whatever you want, this was a mistake, please don’t air it, Jazz would rip his phone from his fingers—smash it against the wall if she had to—and reassure him that everything was going to be okay. He just had to be brave.

He inhaled. Held. Exhaled.

Okay. He was ready.

“Operatives O and K were partners, and the main two operatives assigned to my case. They both seemed similar to the other operatives at first. Clean-cut, sticklers for the rules, dedicated to their jobs. But as time wore on…you know.” He tried not to squirm in his chair, and he failed. “I thought I knew what would happen if they caught me. I was just so sure I would never get caught that I didn’t think about it. And while I knew deep down that what they were showing me in public was just pretense, I wasn’t prepared for how—how—there’s no other way to say it, but how sadistic they truly were.”

“Both of them?” she asked.

“Sure, but O most of all. When they would punish me in the facility, he was usually the one to do it. Or he would order someone else to do it.”

“Did Operative K punish you at all?”

“Sure, they all did, but none as much as O. It was almost like…” He recalled how his lawyer directed him to phrase the next part. Stick to what happened. Stick to what the courts already know. “I could hear him laughing sometimes when he would punish me. He’d make comments, and he’d be smiling.”

“Do you feel as though he took pleasure from seeing you in pain?”

Yes, Danny wanted to shout. But he couldn’t. Legally.

Harriet must have known he couldn’t say yes, though. She wasn’t stupid, and neither were the other writers or producers for this program.

Realization dawned on him all at once. They were offering a conclusion without Danny having to say it.

“I can’t say whether he enjoyed it or not,” Danny answered professionally. “I can only tell you what I experienced.”

Smartly, Harriet moved forward. “Do you think the experiences you’ve had with Operative O and K have impacted your relationships with people moving forward?”

“Of course,” Danny said as if it were obvious, because it was. “The abuse I received from them has affected every aspect of every relationship, no matter if it’s family, friends, potential love interests—everyone.”

“Is it hard for you to form new connections now, would you say?”

Forming them was hard, but maintaining them was even more so the impossible challenge that he and his therapist were still working through unpacking.

But who could blame him, really? Not with the very real paranoia that crept up his spine every time he picked up his phone to send a text. Even though Tucker reassured him over and over that the app they were using was encrypted, Danny, it’s okay to talk in here, how could they be sure?

Especially after what happened before?

****

03:00:00

Danny stumbled off the train. He’d spent so long hopping from station to station he’d all but forgotten where he’d been heading in the first place.

Which the answer to that was…nowhere in particular. He didn’t know where most homeless people slept in Chicago, and even so, he still hadn’t decided if it would be a good idea to join them. If just one person got too good of a look at him, he’d be dead.

And in the modern day, even the homeless had cell phones.

But this neighborhood looked safer. Or, at least, less populated. The houses and apartments were run down, and Danny was sure there were more than a few unsavory characters close by, but it was dark, quiet, and therefore, a good place to try to hide.

Or, at least, he hoped so. He’d never exactly tried to sleep anywhere other than in his or his friends’ houses before.

He glanced up at the sky. Though it was dark, when he put a bit of ectoplasm into his eyes, he could see the rolling clouds layering on top of each other.

Unlucky, of course. Since when did luck ever try to be on his side? His first day sleeping outside, and it was going to rain.

He tasted the air, and while the acrid humidity had increased into the evening, it still wasn’t strong enough for Danny to be worried. It would rain, but not yet. He still had time to find a shelter.

Or, whatever shelter he could scrounge up.

His eyes, still alight with ectoplasm, shifted back in front of him, landing on a telephone pole some feet away. Ever unmistakable on the wood was that damn green sticker with the bird so neon it almost glowed back at him.

“Can’t fucking escape them,” Danny growled, whipping around to walk in the other direction. If that street was going to show its hostility so openly, then fine, he’d just go away.

Just like he always did.

He turned a corner, walking by a brick house that would have been lovely if not for the set of caved-in steps leading up to the door, or the window that looked like it had been shattered by a brick. Danny wondered if anyone was squatting there. Maybe he could hide in there, just for now.

But…what if someone else had the idea first? And then that person called the GIW on him? He could check invisibly, but what if people in Chicago were just as adept at feeling when a ghost entered their room as people in Amity were? It was too risky. He couldn’t do something so bold as go inside an abandoned house.

If not there, though, then where else? Where could he go? Was he forever barred from ever getting shelter, getting safety? Was he only destined to continue searching and searching, coming close but never finding a place to be like some sort of twisted version of Sisyphus? And if so, would the Guys in White be constantly at his heel laughing at him as they watched him get so close only to fail, over and over again?

Was this a game to them?

No, yes, oh Ancients, maybe. Maybe Operative O was so cruel, so sick in the head that he would relish the opportunity to toy with Danny’s mental sanity like this.

Danny’s hands flew up to knot his hair, yanking if only to quiet the shallow breaths and dull the spots that were beginning to dance over his eyes.

He stumbled on. He needed help. He needed Sam and Tucker. God, he couldn’t do this on his own. He’d never been without a home before—he didn’t know what to do! He couldn’t, couldn’t, couldn’t do this.

No!

His whole body stiffened, and cold dread splashed down his spine as he realized one of his hands had unwoven itself from his hair to free his phone from his pocket.

No, no, no. He couldn’t. He had turned it off almost as soon as he’d left the border of Amity Park. Well, actually, he tried to smash it against the pavement but failed. He wasn’t strong enough to completely cut himself off from his loved ones. Not physically, but…the other thing.

Mentally.

He was weak.

Too weak.

His hand trembled as it slid the phone back in his pocket and clutched a cold, metal bar before him. If he turned his cell on, then he could risk everything. He didn’t know if the GIW had the clearance to track his cell, but he wasn’t about to chance it.

He exhaled. He was okay. He took his fears, anxieties, and every twisted creature taunting him from the corners of his mind and shoved them back into their infinitely deep cage.

He couldn’t afford to break down. Not right now.

Unfortunately, in his distraction, he hadn’t noticed the footsteps closing the distance to him till it was too late.

“What are you doing? Get off my fucking gate,” a voice snapped.

Ice froze his sneakers to the ground, and he was slow, too slow to react.

Gate? He looked down, then up, then around. He’d somehow moved to stand in front of a different apartment, this one not abandoned. Sure, the front steps had caved on the sides, and a broken chair sat out front, but the house itself probably had a resident. And this resident, he guessed, was right behind him.

But…he was still on the sidewalk. Okay, maybe his arms were over a front entrance gate, and maybe in his panic it looked like he was trying to look into the house, but he wasn’t trespassing anywhere.

Were they even talking to him?

“Yeah, you, kid! I know you hear me!” The voice was closer now. “The fuck, are you deaf?”

Now, Danny turned as if he was fighting against a pool of syrup. Sure enough, the disembodied voice belonged to someone, though Danny wasn’t sure who because there were multiple guys in front of him. They were all at least several years his senior, and the shortest of the trio probably had at least five inches on him.

Oh. Fuck.

Danny made eye contact with the man in the middle wearing a baggy, unzipped orange and black jacket over an equally baggy hoodie with the hood up over his buzzed hair. He stared down Danny as if he were Satan himself sent here to personally deliver his reckoning, and wouldn’t that just be the ultimate irony of the century?

“Hi,” Danny said meekly.

“What’s good?” the guy in the orange jacket said, eyeing Danny up and down. “The fuck are you doing in front of my place?”

Danny’s eyes darted between the apartment and the clearly hostile dude before him. “I—I wasn’t—” whatever modicum of confidence he’d ever possessed today was clearly so gone that Danny wasn’t sure it had ever existed.

“You casing my fucking house, bro?” the man asked, stepping forward.

Danny wasn’t typically one to feel physically threatened by a human. Hell no, not when he’d faced ghosts ten times more dangerous every week. But for some reason, as he surveyed the three guys who all very much looked a second away from swinging at him, he felt like a little kid standing before Dash and his cronies without any ghost powers to call on.

He couldn’t afford to risk using ghost powers in front of these guys, and the bigger man to the right—the one in the pale blue beanie—was looking at Danny like he was trying to figure out where he’d seen his face before. Maybe that was why he felt so spooked. Or perhaps it was the way Danny knew that these guys weren’t Dash, they were strangers to Danny, they were three guys who’d clearly grown up on the streets of Chicago.

And as much as he understood the hierarchy of ghosts, he sure as shit didn’t understand the human social hierarchy.

He was scared, he realized. He was fucking terrified. He’d been terrified all day and now facing his first night on the streets alone, he was scared even more.

He stepped back and raised his hands, but the trio only advanced further on him.

“Casing my motherfucking house,” the guy repeated, though not to Danny.

Danny had no idea what the guy was talking about. Casing? What?

“What block you from, kid?” the big guy on the right asked. “I swear I seen you before.”

“You haven’t,” Danny said weakly, his voice cracking. “I’ve never met you.”

The skinny guy to the left sneered. “You gonna meet us now, bro.”

Danny’s back hit the gate, and his heart stuttered. “I wasn’t doing anything, I swear. I was just trying—trying to—”

His breath stopped. Trying to...what, exactly? Find shelter? Keep his sanity together? Not get discovered and kidnapped by the government?

All three?

“Shut the fuck up,” the leader said. “You know how many times I’ve heard that talk? Bullshit, man. You gonna get it in. Casing my fucking house? You gonna get it in.”

“Slap his stupidass, bro. Kid’s all doped out anyway. Look at him! Can’t do shit,” the skinny guy said.

“Where your homies at?” the bigger guy asked.

Danny could barely understand what was happening anymore, and he couldn’t stop the anxiety from rising in his throat like bile, spitting out in a flurry of, “I don’t have any! I’m alone. I just want to leave.”

Then, time slowed desperately and painfully. Danny saw the hand coming, in theory, but denial was too powerful of a drug, and no, this wasn’t happening right now. Except it was.

The fist connected with his cheek in a sickening crack. Pain erupted in his bones, and Danny’s head jerked to the side, his body falling onto the gate. He bobbed, clutching the metal bars for stability as he blinked stars out of his vision.

Oh, Ancients, he was doomed. He was going to get jumped by these guys, and there was nothing he could do in self-defense because the only things he knew involved using his powers.

The man closed the distance, landing his next fist in Danny’s stomach. He doubled over, fighting for air that seemed to have little intention of returning to him.

“Fucking kid,” the guy towering over him taunted. “You don’t fucking go in my fucking house.”

“I wasn’t trying to,” Danny whispered.

He didn’t know if the man heard him, but Danny didn’t think it would matter. His friends were whooping behind him, and the rush exuding from his skin told a tale of how little he intended to halt his quest to ruin Danny’s body tonight.

Danny tried to dart to the side, but without his intangibility, the man’s fist caught his jaw, snapping his neck back and sending a cry of pain into the sky. Not that anyone was listening, of course. The spikes from the gate jabbed painfully into his back, and all Danny could think about was how he was cornered, alone, defenseless.

The man took a step back, but Danny knew that meant fuck all. He was just giving himself space to wind up and sock Danny again, or maybe knee him this time, all while his two friends laughed and jeered, and Danny was fucked, he was so fucked.

Panic rushed through him, and he turned to the three men with eyes glazed in what he could be sure pure, unfiltered fear.

He wanted to turn intangible so badly and run, but he couldn’t. If anyone saw, if anyone noticed—

There was no incoming blow.

Danny ripped through the veil of dread clouding his mind, and that’s when he saw it. The big guy pointing to him, and the other two frozen beside him.

“What the fuck is wrong with his eyes, bro?” the skinny guy asked. “Ah shit, don’t tell me he’s possessed.”

“That’s the kid!” the big guy shouted, ignoring his friend. “The Phantom kid! That’s him!”

The skinnier guy rounded on his friend with a, “Who the fuck?”

“No fucking way,” the leader stepped back, falling in line with his friends.

“I ain’t playing, bro, that’s him.”

Danny blinked, and the simmering green disappeared from the edges of his vision.

Three.

Two.

One.

FUCK!

He didn’t wait for them to debate his existence in front of them. Three seconds and his decision was set. Invisibility cloaked him, then intangibility, and then he was past the men, running down the street like his fucking life depended on it, which wasn’t far from the truth.

His sneakers pounded on the pavement, his heart pumping in his ears as a slew of curses overtook his brain.

That was it. He was finished. He was done.

He turned a corner and darted down the sidewalk, not caring who heard him or whatever the fuck else people could be thinking at the sounds of someone sprinting with no body to match. Those guys had figured him out—they’d figured him out!

He was so fucking stupid for thinking he could blend in with anyone. He was a halfa. A freak. He couldn’t do this he couldn’t be here he COULDN’T.

His cell phone rattled in his pocket, and he sidestepped down an alley, accidentally knocking a trash bin over as he made for the back. There was a dumpster there, of course, and he jammed himself into the brick wall beside it, making sure he wasn’t visible to the street before dropping his invisibility and swiping his phone from his pocket.

It was slow—too slow—to turn on. Please, turn on turn on turn on!

He could feel the fringes of reality slipping from his mental hold like threads on a frayed blanket, and he didn’t stop them from leaving. It didn’t matter anymore. Any second, white vans would be surrounding this whole neighborhood and one sweep of an ecto-scanner later and Danny would be fucked.

The phone finally finished loading, and Danny’s shaking fingers only failed at entering his password once before he was past the locked screen and jabbing open his messages.

He had several missed calls, but he couldn’t bother himself with those right now, swiping the notifications away. Not when there was so little time and he was breaking, quickly, so quickly.

The phone hardly rang before a worried voice crackled to life on the other line. “Danny?” Then, the voice turned into alarm. “Danny!”

“Tucker,” Danny gagged. Not on bile, but on tears.

Was he crying?

The other number picked up as well with a barely restrained, “Danny!”

“Sam,” he croaked, clutching his phone like the fucking lifeline that it was.

“Wait, Danny.” Tucker’s tone was suddenly serious. “Listen, you shouldn’t—”

Sam’s voice overtook Tucker’s. “What happened? Are you okay? Please, where are you?”

“No!” Tucker said. “Don’t tell us. Listen, Danny—”

Danny closed his eyes, letting Tucker’s voice turn into a calming drone because so tired of fighting himself and running and it had only been a day, he couldn’t do this, guys, he couldn’t do this alone.

“—and don’t be an asshole, Tuck,” Sam was saying when Danny had the know-how to tune back in.

He didn’t know how long he’d been spacing out. Hopefully, only a few seconds.

“Danny, please, are you safe?” Sam pleaded.

“I—” His voice cracked. “I don’t know.”

“What happened?” Sam asked, her voice rushed. “All we know is that they ambushed you at the school, and then you escaped. We’ve both been getting nonstop questioned by investigators and the police since, but we keep telling them we don’t know where you are. Please tell us you’re somewhere safe, Danny. Please.”

He couldn’t.

Oh, god. How do you tell someone goodbye?

The words slipped out of him. “I was seen.”

There was a pause. Then, Tucker. “By who?”

“Some guys. They jumped me. Didn’t know who I was, and then my eyes…” Danny pinched the bridge of his nose. God, he was so fucking tired.

“You were jumped?!” Sam cried out.

“Okay, wait, listen. If they jumped you, then it might not be so bad. They probably won’t report you.”

“Yeah, violent people don’t tend to like talking to the cops,” Sam said. “You should still be okay.”

Danny’s incoming sob turned into a laugh, because of course! How could he have been so stupid? No Chicago resident trusted law enforcement.

His life wasn’t doomed. He was going to be okay, at least for today. Tomorrow was a different story, but they wouldn’t tattle, he was going to be fine.

“You should still leave wherever you are, just in case,” Tucker said. “You can’t tell us where you’re going, though. I mean it, Danny. We’re getting questioned too much. The less we know, the better.”

“I know,” Danny muttered, wiping his cheeks.

“You need to hang up and turn off your phone. We have no idea if they’re tracking your number. We could be sending off a beacon to them right now for all we know.”

“Yeah, okay,” Danny said, though he was still reveling in his bliss to feel any urgency from Tucker’s voice. “I’ll leave here when I’m done calling you.”

“Please do,” Tucker said.

“Danny, please be safe,” Sam interjected. “You know we love you. All of us, your parents included.”

His stomach jolted, and suddenly he felt like crying all over again.

They said that? Really? His parents?

Was that all they said?

He had so many questions swirling in his head, but there was no time to ask. Tucker was giving his sign-off, and despite the sudden lightness lifting his spirit from the depths of hell, he still felt the sudden urgency to say something.

“Wait!” He cut their goodbyes off. “I—I—you guys. I need you to know…” He swallowed, his vision blurring once more. “Thanks for always being there. You know, as my friends. Seriously, I don’t think I could have survived this long without you.”

There was a second of pause. Then two.

“Jeez, Danny, you don’t have to be so morbid—”

Sam cut Tucker off. “You’ll always be my friend, Danny. Seriously, always. I’m here for you.”

“Ditto,” Tucker added quietly.

Danny pressed the end call button, not trusting himself to break down sobbing with his friends on the other line. Thankfully, his tears waited until his phone was off and back in his pocket before they began to fall. Wretched and uncontrollably, tears spilled on his cheeks, down his chin, and onto the rancid alleyway pavement below as sobs ripped his throat raw.

It wasn’t a goodbye forever, Danny tried to remind himself. They’d talk again. Soon. They’d talk again, and they’d tell him about Jazz, his parents, his parents.

Soon, this would be all over, and Danny would be back in Amity Park in his warm home playing video games and laughing with his best friends.

But if that wasn’t their final goodbye, why did it feel like one?

****

previous / next

[read more of my fics here]

#danny phantom #ectoimplosion2023 #my writing #phicc #dp fanfic #twelve hours #chapter four

27 notes · View notes