#// but jade rights? yessssss

[muraenide]

Now that I'm awake, this panel gives me more so much Jade rights. Proof that he likes to tip someone's chin up to demonstrate his height superiority.

#.mobile #// work is keeping me busy!! so no writing except for short ones until the end of the week #// but jade rights? yessssss #// i hope he gets some interaction with leona since leona is going to appear in octa chap as well

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

Hello!

I was thinking about the Monster!AU and I'm now wondering about how the residents of NRC would react to how differently Yuu is anatomically.

And what I mean by that is like how most of the students have hoofs. A smaller comparison are ears.

I like to imagine them speculating that Yuu just didn't have ears and just understood what they were saying somehow or that Yuu had holes for ears like parrots do until they pushed our hair out of the way and revealed that they did have ears, they were just out of sight. I can also imagine them wondering why Yuu's ears looked like that.

And for the hoofs part, I can also see them wondering why Yuu wears pants and shoes. Because while I do think that they wear clothers on their upper half, I don't think the monsters in this twst au wear pants or shoes, so I think they'd be confused. I imagine some of them being confused about human feet, too. Toes may be a weird thing to them, too. Or at least the type that humans have since I saw that Jade's concept design has toes.

I just have a bunch of things circulating in my head around this au. Whenever I get reminded of it, I keep on thinking of misinformation that could have spread among the years or completely forgotten about that humans have been extinct, and these are just two of the ideas that have popped into my head. Your au is haunting me in the worst and best way possible.

Oooh yes yes yes yessssss, I love this sort of musing! It gives me life and inspires lil’ ideas in me~! ovo/ Muahahaha, I love that the Monster!AU is giving people ideas, because I love seeing the little shenanigans and randomness that can appear! c:<

Depending on the Yuu’s hair style (or lack of hair style if they have no hair), human ears would definitely be one of those curiously confusing aspects that may have monster students and researchers alike poking and pulling on them (though they do apologize if they pull too hard since ears are sensitive). In some cases, they might wonder if humans alter the shapes of their ears so they appear more rounded and cute before they find out that, no, this is how human ears naturally look.

Imagine their horror the moment they realize some humans actually pierce various parts of their body with metal! Sure, they may pierce their own ears (Kalim being one example), but piercing your nose? Bellybutton?! Tongue?!? “Why are humans so weird with decorative metal pieces all over their body!? Doesn’t that hurt?!” 

Don’t worry, they get over it and get curious and fascinated by the style! 0v0/)

(No but seriously, there are some really gorgeous styles for piercings that can look really cool, I just get squeamish at the thought of having anything but my earlobes pierced for small studs, let alone getting a plug/tunnel or even tattoos for myself. 😅 If it’s your thing, then just make sure to keep the areas clean so they don’t get infected and you can continue looking and feeling amazing, you beautiful person! UvU)

You're right in that they do still wear clothes (I know the concept art doesn’t seem like it, but that’s because I don’t feel like dealing with clothing on that small a scale when I’m trying to figure out how to make their anatomy work), but they do in fact wear pants! Well, except Deuce, given how his body works, so it’s a case by case basis and choice. 😆 So, the fact that Yuu is wearing pants wouldn’t seem that unusual. Their shoes, however…

Like you said, most of the monsters have hooves and can wear horseshoes to make sure they have good traction wherever they go (they can be either metal or specialized rubber that mimics the soles of our own shoes and boots). Those who don’t have hooves though can easily adapt to different surfaces and can build up a tolerance for hot or cold (though that doesn’t mean it’s any less unpleasant during those times), but they’re certainly able to tolerate it better than we humans could, so the concept of shoes never really came to light and it was assumed that all humans had weirdly shaped hooves.

You can probably imagine how the students reacted the moment they realized that those “hooves” weren’t hooves at all.

//

Deuce: “Are you okay, Yuu? Coach was worried you were about to pass out.”

Yuu: *finished with running laps and collapsed under the shade of a tree to cool down* “Ugh…it’s so hot today.”

Ace: “Yeah, it is pretty hot.” *using his wings to generate a breeze to cool them down*

Yuu: “How come you’re not overheating?”

Ace: “Hm? Well that’s easy. Skvader’s and other rabbit-like monsters cool down with our ears. When the wind passes through them, it helps cool us down easier. We don’t really sweat like Deuce or any other species.”

Deuce: “How do humans keep cool?”

Ace: “Well, considering that Yuu’s sweating up a storm, I think they cool down the same way as centaur do.”

Yuu: “Well yeah…though we also cool down through our feet.” *realization sinks in as they sit up* “Oh yeah. Thanks for reminding me, I need to take my shoes off.”

Ace: “Shoes? What are those?”

Deuce: “How are you bending your leg like that, Yu-AAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!!”

Ace: “AAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!”

Yuu: *holding shoe in one hand* “Why are you two screaming?!”

Ace and Deuce: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!!”

Riddle: *rushing over in a panic* “What’s wrong? Why are you-?” *sees Yuu holding their shoe in one hand* “AAAAAAAAA!!!! Yuu!! Your hoof!!!”

Yuu: “My what!? Why is everyone screaming?!”

Vargas: “What is going on here?!”

Yuu: “I have no idea! They just started screaming!”

Deuce: “Yuu! You literally just ripped your hoof off your leg!! We need to get you to the doctor before you bleed out!!!”

Yuu: *realizes what’s going on now* “Deuce, I’m fine! I’m not bleeding, see? It’s just my shoe! You guys can stop screaming now!”

Ace: “What the heck is a shoe!?”

Yuu: “It’s a cover we humans wear on our feet to protect them from getting hurt of gravel, glass, or other things that can injure us.” *pulls off sock and wiggles toes* “See? This is what a human foot looks like.” *notices Deuce and Riddle swaying, looking pale as a ghost* “Uh…guys?”

Thud! WHUD!!

Yuu: “Riddle!? Deuce!! Are you okay?!”

Ace: “I…I think they’re still processing the fact that you didn’t just dismember yourself in front of them.” *lays down* “I need a moment…”

//

…yeah, it went about as well as the grape incident. 😂 It took some explanation before those with hooves (like Riddle and Deuce) to recover from the shock of thinking Yuu had hurt themselves and get used to the sight of them without their shoes on when they’re relaxing or cooling down. It’s a simple yet powerful reminder to them that Yuu is literally from an extinct species that they know so little about.

Of course, the researchers (once they realized what was going on with the shoes) instantly became curious and studied how versatile humans could be. You know how sometimes when you’re carrying an armful of something or even just drop something lightweight, and instead of trying to bend down to get it you just grab the item with your foot and twist your leg to grab it easier? (Don’t deny it, I know you do this too fellow reader!) As “lazy” as it may seem, it’s still fascinating how our bodies are able to move in ways that may seem physically impossible or difficult to do in any other species outside of primates!

And I just imagined a scene similar to the one in Tarzan where he was trying to figure out what Jane was and accidentally tickled her, so imagine that happening and the monster in question accidentally getting kicked in the face because Yuu was overly ticklish 🤣

That’s all I’ve got for now, so I hope you enjoy! If anyone has any other ideas they wanna share, hit me up! ÒvÓ

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland monster au #twst monster au #ace trappola #deuce spade #riddle rosehearts #twisted wonderland yuu #twst yuu #what's this? Two posts in a row?! #I couldn’t resist 😂

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

ONOT THE NEXT ONE “BETTER THAN WE FOUND” IT LAST PART I’M NOT READY BUT I SO AM

Ngl tho better than we found it is kinda a nice last title it has an air of lightness to it

.

it better hecking be reflected in this episode if it ends on a cliffhanger or angsty note i’ma lose it

okay here we go

(s4 special pt 4 spoilers ahead)

STARTING IT UP HECK BREAKS I’M JUST SITTING HERE

OOP

MK COMPASSION COMING THORUGH AGAIN

WELP THAT’S EVERYTING

SHIFU JUST WATCHING IT

OH ITS THE LITTLE GIRL

HI LITTLE GIRL

OH CHANG’E HI LOVE

HAHA PENG TRYING TO DIP

MEI

MEI’S NOT GONNA LET THEM

SHE WANTED TO FIGHT

AHA

AHAHAHAHAHA

TURNING WORDS BACK ON THEM NICE ONE THAT’S FUNNY

HAHA

MEI AND MACAQUE TEAMING UP IS SO GOOD

HELPGN;LDKMDS

JUST CHOMPS HIM UP

YELLOW TUSSKK COME ON BUDDY

SANDY

ABSOLUTE BELOVED

THAT’S NOT REALLY HOW WE ROLL HERE

AWWWW

YESSSSSS

LETSGOOOOOO

THEY FUN

I LOVE THEM

B TEAM MOVE OUT

MK JUST

QUIET

I LOVE HIM

HE’S SO GOOD

HE’S SO KIND

AFTR BEATING THE GRAP OU TO FHIM BUT Y’KNOW

OOP

THEM LOOKING AT WUKONG AS HE GOES PAST HECK

JUST STOP

HECK DUDE

I PUT YOU IN THE UNDERWORLD MYSELF?

HE WAS DEAD?

OH SHOOT

OHHHH

YEAH SOME OTHER THING HAPPENIGN

CACKLES

OKAY

YEAH RIP DUDE JSUT RELAX

IS HE GONNA DIE MAKING IT BETTER?

PROBABLY HUH

YEAH I GET THE FEELING WHOEVRE THIS IS IS AFTER YOU MK

OH YEAH THERE HE GOES

WUKONG STOPPING HIM

HECK DUDE

WHY DO YOU LOOK SURPRISED SHIFU

OH WOW HE’S

HECKING DISINGTERGRATING

YEAH OKAY BYE BUD

I’M

I DON’T REALLY FEEL SUPER BAD FOR YOU BUT

OH HECK UH

WHATS THAT WHO’S TAKING IT

IS THAT THE JADE EMPERORSPOWER YEAH

UH

SO WHO’S GONNA HANG ON TO THAT

OH NEZHA TRYING TO GOT THIS

I DONT’ THINK YOU WILL BUD

UH WHAT ARE THOSE CHAINS

HECK DUDE

oh nice hair tang  very fluffy we love that

OOP

TANG U GOT THIS

YES FRIEND GROUP POWER OF FRIENDSHIP MOMETN SURE YES

AND YELLOW TUUUUSK ILY

YEAHYEAH WE KNEW MAC WOULD HELP

ARE THEY GONNA LOCK THE JADE EMPERORS PWOER AWAY?

OH WOW NEZHA NICE

BRO

NICELY DONE

FFM IS NOT DESTROYED TAT’S AWSOME

HAHAHGHDFJKSDAF

UYEAH CHECK ON HIM ITS THE LAD

OH MAN DUDES BEEN THROUGH IT

HELPGN;LDSKFMAE

ILY ILY YOU PIGSY

ILY SM

DADSY REAL

TANG CALM DOWNG;LSKMF

SANDYGDS;FKAMGWEFIMAWF

MAAAAN

THEY SURE ARE FAMBLY MOMENT

GO ASK BUDDAH NEZHA

YOUR’E GONNA GT ATTACKED BY WHOEVER WANTED AZURE OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE

SEASON 5 IS TERRIFYING ME RN

ngl compared to the lbd one so far this felt a little anticlimactic and i porbably just jinxed myself but i dont care. that one also had 3 seasons of build up tho so… yeah hjGKL;SJADF MK THO

DANG

HELPGMSDFK

PUSHING WUKONG AWAY YUP

GOOD MOVE NEZHA

DESERVED

RED SON RED SON RED SON RED SON

OH THEY ARRESTED HIM HUH

AWWWWW

WELP

WHERE ARE YOU TAKING HIM MAN

JADE EMP IS DEAD

WHERE’S THE FUN IN TAHT

ALL THAT

SO LONG AS WE LEAVE THE WORLD IN BETTER SHAPE THEN WE FOUND IT… THEN ITS ALL GOOD RIGHT?

MK’S INJURED GET HIM TO THE HOSPITAL

AND UH

OKAY WHERE’S THE OTHER BOOT DROPPING

I LOVE THEM SM

THEY ALL SO FANCY

HUG

SIDE HUG

.

HELPGN;DSAFKLMAWE

BEACH DAY

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

I’M WAITIN FOR THE BOOT DROP BUT I’M IGNORING IT NOW I HAVE TO APPRECAITE ALL OF THIS RIGHT NOW

THE SHIRT

THE HAT

THE SUNGLASSES

THE SHORTS

HE’S THE UNCLE THAT JUST GOT BACK FROM PICKIGN UP THE SNACKS

THE MEI MK AND RED SON, THE WAY RED SON’S STANDING, TANG WITH HIS UMBRELLA DBK AND PRINCESS IRON FAN STYLIN PIGSY IS THE DAD AT THE BBQ I’M GONNA CRY

PLEASE TANG’S FIT I’M CRYINGNS;LDKFM;AOWEF

NEXT FRAME MEI WITH THE WATER GUN RED SONGHL;KFAJ;OWIEMFASFD MK DECKED OUT IN SWIMMING GEAR I’M CRYING

PLEASE PRINCES IRON FAN PLAYING VOLLYBALL WITH THEM I’M SCREAMING

MEI LOOKS LIKE A DUDEBRO GAL I KNOW AND I’M LIVING FOR IT RED SON’S FACE PLEASELKMGOASDF I NEED THESE ALL FRAMED

PLS SANDY GETTING BURRIED TANG CARVING HIS MUSCLES OUT OF SAND PIGSY GIVING HIM A DRINK MO DECKED OUT IN SAND GEAR, RED SON’S SUNGLASSES ON A SAND SNOWMAN AND LOOKING ANNOYED ABOUT IT MK’S SMILE I’MGN;LSDKFM

I’M SCREAMING NEXT FRAME IS DBK AND SWK THE DADS FISHING THE BROS FISHING TOGETHER I’MGN;LSDFMAOWFIMSADF

SUNSCREEN

BEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD

YOU’RE GETTING SO SUNBURNED

SUNSCREEN NEEDS TO ABSORB FIRSTN;LDKMSD

yeah that’s parent energy

.

i didn’t know sunscreen needed to absorb first-

OKAY MOVING ON G;LSDFNAB;OGAI;WEOFIM

PIGSY IS SUCH A DAD

UYUP THATS HOW WE ROLL

you don’t understand the moment i’m having here with MACAQUE AND HIS PINK SHIRT AND YELLOW PANTS AND PROBABLY LOW HANGING TANK TOP I’ SCREAMIGNDF;LAMEF;OAIWEN;OIAFM

“cute” WOW WHAT AN ANGLE

art for this show is so nice tho m a n

this is gonna make me cry

Wukong with his

overdramatic sarcasm

and Macaque just seeming kinda tired

and

hECK LEAVE IT A LTTEL BETTER THAN YOU FOUND IT

HECKING

PEACH POPSICLE

NOT THE SAME BUT

SO FMAILAR

THAT CAN BE A TOMORROW PORBLEM

MACAQUE DOESNT’ QUITE SMILE BUT

WOW HE SURE DOES PLOP HIMSELF DOWN RIGHT NEXT TO WUKONG

MAN

MK IS SO SUNBURNED

HE IS SO SUNBURNED

RIP MY DUDE

RED SON SOAKED AND THERE’S A FISH IN HIS HAT

I’M SO SAD WE DIDN’T GET TO HEAR HIS VOICE BUT I LOVE THAT THEY UNCLED HIM HAVING FUN WITH THE DUO THEY ARE EVERYHTIGN TO ME

OKAY YES, OTHER SHOE, HIT ME WITH IT

OKAY WHO THESE GUYS

WHO’S THE PARTY

WHATCHA DOIN

K

KAY IS THAT IT??

REALLY THAT’S ALL YOU GIVE US??

FINEEEEE FINE OKAY

I’M FINE

.

all in all i actually really enjoyed that special like  A LOT

give me like two days and i’ll process what i saw in pt 3 and

ehre and

there

and everywhere

actually i kinda enjoy how vague it is 10/10 the montage of them on the beach hanging is so nice Mk applying sunscreen is so cute he’s so good he’s so fast I love how wukong’s Shifu energy of just like cause mk is monkey like him so its “yeah that’s how we roll” n stuff

Macaque’s style is killing me

Wukong’s is just dad

Macaque’s is just

I don’t even know how to categorize it and i’m okay with that

WELL

JADE EMPERORS DEAD

AZURE’S DEAD

PENG STILL OUT THERE

YELLOW TUSK IS ARRESTED

MK IS MONKEY

MACAQUE IS VIBIN WITH THE CREW

WUKONG IS BETTER AT COMMUNCIATING

I’M CURIOUS IF THEY EVEN HAVE HIM HAVE THE SAME POWER LEVEL AS MK

OKAY

UH

THAT WAS ALL A BLUR

I NEED TO WATCH IT SIX MORE TIMES HAVE A GOOD ONE

KNOX OUT

#knox rambles #knox reacts #Monkie kid season 4 special spoilers #lmk s4 special spoilers #Monkie kid season 4 special #lmk s4 special #WELL #this reaction feels shorter than my others but its okay #I REALLY DID ENJOY IT SO MUCH #HECK #I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF NOW THAT ITS OVER Y'KNOW? #I NEED LIKE A GOOD WEEK TO PROCESS EVERYTHING #HOPE Y'ALL DOING WELL I'M GONNA GO BRAINROT ABOUT POSSIBLE AMV'S I CAN DO NOW

[avacodork]

Yuu but as a siren??? Semi-translusent. Very pale because deep sea creature (I'm sorry anyone with darker skin. BUT no descriptions other than here which you can ignore. Alls good!). Silky smooth voice, master manipulator, hypnotic, and able to read people like a children's book. Great physical prowess?

I think Jamil would have had a very difficult time with them because of this.

-–—

People always liked you, why wouldn't they? You were amazing, kind, beautiful, and smart. These served you well when you found yourself trapped in a different world.

-–—

Ace: *At your door with a collar on.* ehe...

S!yuu: *Glares and closes the door.*

Ace: *Panicing* WAIT!

S!Yuu: You almost got me expelled. Why would I wait.

Ace: because- uh.... I could be a great ally...?

S!Yuu: *Laughs* Surrrreeeee~ you'd make a great ally. About as useful as a peice of broken plastic.

Ace: *Scoffs* well at least I can use magic.

S!Yuu: I suppose your right. *Opens the door.* Fine.

-–—

Duece: I don't know what happened...

Ace: YOU THREW ME!

S!Yuu: *Smiling* You're now my favorite.

Ace: What!?!

Duece: *Fist pump* Yessssss!

-–—

S!Yuu and Grim: *Talking while walking to next class.*

Scarabia student b: *Pushes into yuu as he passes.*

S!Yuu: *Begins Humming as they continue walking.*

Grim: That guy has no manners! Why are you just Humming hench human? Do something.

Scarabia student a: *Shouts in suprise* b!?

Scarabia student b: *collapsed on the Floor.*

S!Yuu: *Smiles while they continue walking.*

-–—

Jack: Yuu. What are you?

S!Yuu: Hmmm? I'm human.

Jack: you kept pace with ruggie and seemed really good at that spelldrive match between ruggie and Leona. But you were holding back. What are you?

S!Yuu: *Smiles* I'm human as far as you should be concerned.

Jack: *Huffs* Fine then. I'll figure it out.

-–—

Floyd: *Poking Yuus cheak* Shrimpy~ talk to me!

S!Yuu: *Ignoring him*

Jade: *Chuckles* So, you regret taking him down yet?

S!Yuu: *Blank, deadpan face* Who.

Floyd: *Pokes cheak harder and whines* Shrimpy-!

S!Yuu: *Turns and trys to bite Floyd's finger*

Floyd: *Yanks hand away before smiling and laughing.* We should call you Sharky!

Jade: *Chuckles.* Please, their harmless.

S!Yuu: *Plotting murder* Of course! *Smiles warmly to hide their irritated malice.*

-–—

Azul: *Pushes contract infront of Yuu*

S!Yuu: *Reads it.* Why are you asking for my voice?

Azul: Don't worry You can still use body language to communicate.

S!Yuu: That's not what I asked.

Azul: *Pulls contract away* ...Never mind....

S!Yuu: Azul.

Azul: ...

S!Yuu: Okay then. *Gets up and leaves.*

‐–—

Leona: *Asleep.*

S!Yuu: *Supposed to get him and drag him to class. Is squatting beside him contemplating.*

Leona: zzzzz

S!Yuu: *Pokes his cheak, no response. Pokes his nose, no response. Pokes him in the eye.*

Leona: *Jumps up and growls* What do you want!?

S!Yuu: *In a slight sing-song voice.* We are going to class~

Leona: *Feeling more complacent and like he actually wants too.* Fine.

Ruggie: *Saw everything* What the f**k!? How did they not die! What the f**k!

-–—

Jamil: *Staring at Yuu*

S!Yuu: *Staring at Jamil*

Jamil: ... how?

S!Yuu: How what?

Jamil: *Visably unnerved.* How were you not hypnotized?

S!Yuu: *Tilts head.* Because I'm built different.

Jamil: BUT HOW!?!

Kalim: What's going on???

-–—

S!Yuu: *Smiles*

Malleus: ... *Small smile*

S!Yuu: You're one of my favorites.

Malleus: :D

Anything I'm missing? Maybe drowning people...

Trey: *Paniced* WHAT ARE YOU DOING YUU!?!

S!Yuu: *Smiles at trey* He approached me.

Ace: *Drowning* H- Hel- *cough* HELP!!!

S!Yuu: *Pushes him further into the water.* he's fine.

Duece: *Jumping into the water.* No he's not!?!

I PICTURED A F*****G KANGAROO! SITTING IN THE MIDDLE OF A LAKE! WHY!?! It's so funny.

#twst wonderland #incorrect quotes #au were yuu is a siren #do what you will with this information #no description #this is funny to me #hope you enjoy

[thegeminisage]

much as it pains me, i only have an hour or so before bedtime so i've decided to press on to gerudo town...i want my snow boots before i try to get that memory and i KNOW they are there

omg this stable has boxes everywhere?! my buddy is here too. where to even begin

YOOOOO evil zelda has been at work here.........telling them not to go near the WELL in a DESERT?

cleaning up thi hoarder junk lol just like real life

man...it's so SAD to be their final customer :( it's sad they have to close up forever...

oh!! he wants art for the stable's final days 😭

geez, those are some tough pictures to get...i'll do my best, but not tonight lol

evil zelda saying stay away from the well is why it's shutting down!!! noooo

girl why does everyone obey her like that, like against logic...the monarchy barely means anything anymore. shes my babygirl but like if my stable was closing bc of some nonsense order i would simply violate the order

DONT TAKE ME OUT OF THE WELL I NEED THAT LOOT........

OMG yessssss FROGGY LEGGINGS!!!!!! god at LAST...only ONE MORE PIECE TO GO............

if i cleaned the well out does that mean the stable can open again 🥺

oh, when your meal pouch is full addison gives you rupees twice lol

im in the desert and i HATE. SAND. anakin skywalker was right about everything

oooh but it looks so different...the bazaar...what IS that tall thing...how do i sneak in this time lol

this poor korok will have to wait til i get my fucking sand & snow boots

oh cool you can rent a sand seal with a CARRIER now...love it

ah, i see. i guess i can take the korok after all lol. one less for later!

this sand shroud business seems SPOOKY...wild weather in real life fascinates me, and so too does wild video game weather

damn this old lady is fucking jaded. begging me not to drop dead in front of her lol

oh FUN this gerudo is teaching me like, gerudo language, and she's trying to teach me how to make the "v" sound...which i know, because english, but in japanese they don't have that i don't think. COOOOLL

lol a rito just named guy

ah, the updraft is to fly over the shroud...very good. i remember the map not working in botw and it was scary lol

but i still wonder how i get in??

just like when i did the story in the other areas i activate the shrines and leave them behind...smh. at least this time i have the excuse of "it's almost bedtime"

WHAT is this big mushroom thing with the bud in it??? looks almost like a lightroot

i've officially hit 999 brightbloom seeds lol. the game won't let me pick up anymore

oh wow the map going fuzzy is just as bad as i remember lol. it's bedtime but i just GOTTA get to town first...i think i remember an npc saying something about zombies i WANT TO SEE THE REDEADS (or do i)

okay. so.

i got. in. like by just. walking in.

saw a redead. immediately froze in terror.

it's not moving. i'm not moving. alright. alright

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I SHOT IT AND IT GOT BACK UP KILL IT WITH FIRE

killed it with fire. don't like that

GIBDO BONE..........................it is literally not a gibdo. it's not a mummy. it's a redead!!!

shit fuck this looks. so bad. hudson's poor daughter...where even IS everyone

riju's not here...but i found her diary

my friends link and zelda are in hyrule and they'll take care of it 😭

geez she is so young to be dealing with all of this...older now but still

SNOWSHOE DUDE????

oh my god he's FINALLY in........but to what avail..................

so, everyone is hiding in the wells...

wow, even the bar is fucked up......tragic

where tf are the wells?

OH i found one!!! a square well!

message in a BOTTLE!!!! JUST LIKE OOT

oh lol it's a love letter from a gerudo. girl.......you can't just put love letters in bottles...you and finley both...enough

oh i found the way in but i don't have the girl clothes :( idk how to do it!!!

BULIARA WITH THE STEEL CHAIR

omg i get the special exception rule <3 i guess thats better than the last game...?

man they arent even allowed to talk to me lol

oh, these guys don't seem to know the trick - killing them with fire lol

another heroines quest! i'll be honest i didn't really understand the first one...

omg they put a guy in JAIL for coming in here...they're serious!!

ok the last thing i wanted to do before bed, which i am late for, was get my shoes. i had to look up the location but AAAA theres two redeads in my way!!!!!!!!! literally kill with fire

i am so tense and hypervigilant walking thru this town. my eyes sweeping everywhere between steps. i am NOT gonna get jumped by one of those motherfuckers this close 2 bedtime

oh god FINALLY made it

those brightbloom seeds just paid for my desert vai armor! of course i had enough for the boots and bought them first lol

well it's more than half an hour past the bedtime i wanted

but i unblocked the door and walked out

saw a redead shambling towards me. went back in.

that's a sign. that's for future liz to deal with tomorrow. eugh

#personal #loz blogging #totk lb #totk spoilers

[commanderbuffy]

Kris said dealers choice so here is a teaser for today:

When she does start to wake she notices first that she’s perfectly warm from the ribs down with the exception of her right foot that pokes out from under the covers. The air in the room is cool in the morning hours but that isn’t uncomfortable. In fact, Kit is loath to move or open her eyes. Her body feels like it’s one with the mattress and there is a pleasant weight wrapped around her. There’s a slight tickle to her nose though and she brings the palm of her hand up to wipe it away. Her fingers brush through soft springy curls and she sighs, bringing her hand to cup at the back of Jade’s head. 

There’s a shift in the soft puff of air at her throat and then that perfect weight moves at Kit’s side. It doesn’t slip away but Kit can tell Jade is waking up from her cat-like stretch under the shared sheet. Kit squirms suddenly when nimble fingers dance along her ribs and she remembers that they are both fully naked.

AHHHH YESSSSSS WE LOVE IT SO MUCH

#wigs snippet

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

You like Assassins creed? :0 Do you have a favorite game/character?

I LOVE the kenway family, yes all three of them. Mostly Edward cuz AC4 is a masterpiece, but the Haytham and Connor drama? Hell. yeah. I literally cried reading AC: Forsaken T_T

Shay? Mmmmmm yessssss YESSSSS. Man fighting for the right cause. I'm also 100% sure Shay joined the Templars for the cool outfits. My GOD he's handsome in those black outfits.

Next is probably the Frye Twins. I fell in love with them immediately when it came out. They're just badass chaotic twins! (Also if you hadn't noticed, Jade's braid hairstyle is inspired by Evie's!). I'm super invested even to the Jack the Ripper DLC (40 YEAR OLD JACOB'S HOT AS FUCK). I also read AC : Underworld for the Henry Green side story!

So there's that! I was OBSESSED with Assassin's Creed actualy. I even made an Indonesian OC about a female assassin during the dutch colonial era 😂

#non-cod #I love AC #but I don't like the current rpg style :( #in fact I hate it #I WANT THE STORIESSS #THE HEART WRENCHING STORIESSS

[wrestlezon]

revolution 2022 liveblog containment post

it'll be in here because if i make a million separate posts i'll get lost on my own blog. tho tbh i'll probably be too busy yelling in a groupchat

the cgi chain on the cm punk vs mjf promo makes me laugh every time it comes up without fail

OHHHH we're starting strong with the preshow. i wanted to see the leyla vs kris fight so bad. violence!!!

;_; w-well if she was going to win i'd rather it be like this i guess. illegitimate leyla...

"hey wow its kenn-- HEY!!!!!"

qt's corner counter to him looking confused left and right to gettin caught in hook's hold was pretty funny lol

im also excited for the evil wizard magic fight here. please cast spells of punch and chop and flipslam

penta with the moves!!! hell yes

yeah ok just a bunch of big beefy dudes crawling and slithering up to each other while panting heavily and staring into each others eyes nbd

----

oh boy! eddie jericho is up first!!! get him eddie

EDDIE YOU SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME FOR MOST OF THAT MATCH BUT HELL YES!!! HELL YESS YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

omg jericho you tapped out and youre btichin out on your word? damn!!

being able to hear bobby fish yelling ringside is great. please keep the ringside mic up, aew

that was the result i expected to see! go jurassic express!! but by god did they make me worry the whole match LMAO how intense

oh its the ladder match! i hope orange limbos under the ladder everyone is walking around

keith lee swinging orange around like a flail is everything i wanted

ok wardlow winning is what i expected and wanted!! i cant wait to see where this goes re: him and MJF YESSSSSS WARDLOW

oh my god jade cargill your entire everything right now. OH MY GOD YOURE GIVING US EVREYTHING RIGHT NOW

OH IS THE DOG COLLAR MATCH UP NOW? IS IT?????? IS IT

OH MY FUCKING DFOGOGDODDSD THE CLASSIC THEME?? CLASSIC CM PUNK THEME?? CLASSIC PUNK??? HELPPPP

EVYERTHING I WANT EVERYTHING I WANT EVERYTHING I WANT

HOLY SHIT THAT CHAIN BRUISE

TACKS??? TACKS??????? THEYRE BREAKING OUT THE TACKS?????????????

WARDLOW KING SHTI

im still shocked at that thunder rosa tackle off the ring. sad at the match outcome tho

moxley danielson fight good so far

lmao @ danielson being covered in moxley's blood

oh my god whats this guy doing here!?? and hes scolding his sons???

oh no sting dont slam on the tables from the balcony youre so old

holy shit adam cole your cosplay right now

HANGMAN YOUR OUTFIT TOO WOW

the crowd chanting for and against "adam" lmaooooo

wrestlers using their opponents moves on them is my favorite thing tbh

very happy with that ending even though i am WORN out from the wrestle. this ppv was completely worth it. hashtag bless

#talkzon

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2020-03-12

I have been told only a few things about the upd8 that just landed, over Discord by two people:

upd19 feat. 4,901,157 read it. now. note: the featuring note is accurate if in a different base than what you might be expecting

What the fuck does that even mean.

Okay Pretty good chapter.

...from another friend who VERY dislikes HS^2?  Oh shit.

I also glimpsed a post that may or may not have been about Homestuck at all at the top of my Tumblr feed for an instant that said “YES YES YES YES YES” in huge bold print.  I have no idea whether to be excited or nervous.

Okay, it’s not a Bonus update... let me comb through from an earlier page to be careful not to get a spoilerlook at the pagecount...

...huh.  That seems... like a conversation that would be up my alley, but not necessarily unique so far or worth all this crowing about.  I thought we were about to get Dirk-aliens with a full Horschestra backing... are we getting something else?

> CHAPTER 6. A Conversation Regarding Relevance

Hmmmmmmmm.  With the contrast between their reactions and this ominous buildup, there’s got to be a serious fun-twist coming.  Right?  --I’ll stop with that talk for the moment though.

space is vast. an unproductive statement, almost a tautology. [...]

Alright, that and the starry background are riffing the fuck off Star Trek.  Nice homage to Andrew’s roots.

the lives of the many are far too volatile and instinct-driven

Alt!Callie what the fuck are you doing.  This is intentional now.  You can’t play this off as “what’s a Star Trek”.

tautologies are, in general, reserved for stories. for narrative device. for finding new and inventive ways to tell an audience that which they already know.

God damnit she’s still doing it

neither of us ever able to convince the other of the righteousness of our stance. we were never meant to agree. it isn’t in our blood.

Blah blah overanalyzing classpect blah

when they scoff at my tautology ‘space is vast’, what do they really know? nothing. as far as any of them have experienced, space does not exist.

It’s still nice to see some real personality leak through on Alt!Callie.  We definitely know from her other self that she can develop quite a relatable and colorful one.  Have the years helped?

> ==>

dramantic pouse... ........

Also,

-look at that collar.  Damn, Callie, that is a collar

very few have stood and looked into the abyss, the true gulf of nothingness that spreads out around the single point of consciousness adrift in a constellation. all the combined weight of sentient endeavour would quail underneath that sheer, irresistible truth. the realization that they are so small, that the universe cares about their puny lives so very little. sitting in the glowing light of the stars this becomes even more apparent

In the official aspect quiz I never took the time to analyze, the aspects were put on a wheel where Space was a neighbor to Void, if I recall correctly.  I wonder how much those aspects engender feelings of goddamnit I’m doing it again aren’t I

...

are we out of orange juice?

Yesss let more personality Alt!Callie bleed through, more of it~

Wait, does Alt!Callie even taste through Jade?  Isn’t this remote control?  Is she vicariously drawing pleasure from Jade’s not-just-meat-or-candy mostly-human taste buds or?

> ==>

JADE: are you talking to me? JADE: because if you are i would like to remind you that i hate!! orange juice!!

OH FUCK YES!!! SHE’S IN THERE AND AWAKE!!! SHE STILL HAS AT LEAST ENOUGH AGENCY TO BE PRESENT AND ARGUE WITH CALLIE! YESSSSSS

no you don’t.

JADE: well i guess i never really had a strong opinion on it before JADE: but now i cant stand it!! JADE: its all you drink!

i like the pulp.

QUIT INADVERTANTLY FORCING SHIT ON JADE WITH NARRATIVESPEAK GIVE HER A BIT OF LEEWAY ALT!CALLIE YOU CONTROLLING--

JADE: its my body and i dont want orange juice! JADE: i hate pulp, and i didnt just make that up to spite you JADE: who wants strings in their juice?

i do.

JADE: ughhhhhhhhh

I have had friends hopefully fantasize about and/or therapeutically roleplay this exact situation with Jade breaking through and arguing with Alt!Callie’s control to make this all a fair bit more palatable but I didn’t dare to hope we’d get even THIS much

Maybe the HS^2 authors DO care about not leaving us wallowing in hopeless witness to the characters’ constant torture and existential turbosuffering!!!! :#D

i realize that jade’s situation is less than ideal from a characterization perspective, but i still politely point out that nobody likes a whiner.

Fuck you, this isn’t CALIBORN you’re trying to repress you asshole!  Leave Jade some AGENCY!!!!!  She deserves it!!

JADE: fuck you rude calliope inside my head!

YES EXACTLY

JADE: why dont you try being possessed by the spirit of some other version of a good friend of yours, and floated around a spaceship full of people you love JADE: unable to affect anything or say hello to anyone! JADE: then tell me about whiners!

i killed my brother and consumed him.

JADE: sounds like a you problem

Compromise and give her some agency finally come on compromise and give her some agency you red-text twatwaffle

i suggest to the witch that i have spent untold eons in the void between universes, waiting for the moment i would be needed to prevent the dissipation of reality as we know it. her appeals to emotion will not help her. i will remain unmoved.

Oh god damnit.

JADE: well i had to watch my boyfriend and my brother die in front of me on a tiny scaled version of a world that i shrunk for them! JADE: and then spend the next three years talking to myself, wracked with guilt that id killed them!

Oh. God. Damnit.  This had better not be where the Suicide trigger warning was coming from.  Are there going to be any characters left who DIDN’T emerge from this mess feeling suicidal?!?  (I mean if there were any understandable case it would be three years alone on the golden ship Jade but-- I mean COME ON, we have to discuss that in our FIRST GLIMPSE at her since the epilogues?!?)

> ==>

i remind the witch that my time was in the void, which is far darker and lonelier [...]

Oh fuck you don’t compare suffering as an excuse to COMPLETELY body-enslave and squash the agency of someone when you probably don’t have to.  You’re just doing what’s COMFORTABLE alt!Callie admit it.  There’s a way you could give her some leeway, I’m almost positive.

JADE: even if i had the powers of a first guardian, my brain still worked in modules of human pattern recognition! JADE: three years is a long time for a human teenager, i dont care how many of her molecules are made of a god!

(i love it when jade talks smart, that bit of the epilogues was a treat too, plz reveal more of the big brain on jade)

It seems Jade can’t see or quite understand the full import of there being a “narrative”.  Or THINKS she cant, because she still says:

JADE: your voice is impossible to read and i cant see your face

If she’s “reading” alt!Callie’s remarks, that means she’s breaking through to understand the narrative to SOME extent.  She might be one of the ones who learns to do that a little more and better in the future, especially with alt!Callie almost unintentionally training her to see it.

> ==>

Oh, good.  So A!C’s not above being considerate.  That’s a step in the right direction.

> ==>

D’aww, Jade conceding and trying to empathize like her usual self.  I appreciate it.  :)  --but Alt!Callie’s definitely in the wrong here.

JADE: but i think it is a very natural thing to be silly when you are used to being able to control your own body, but now cant

i will allow that, yes.

Thanks.  Learn some damned reason.

jade smiles. dave and karkat will always be a source of pain for her, a low ache somewhere in her center of gravity, but she is happy for them. she knows that there is really no other alternative for how to be. they chose each other over her, and they always will. they are the two people who matter to her the most in every universe, and that will not change, no matter how much she wishes it would, no matter how--

JADE: do you actually know that?

pardon me?

Oh, shit.

JADE: do you actually know that im doomed to pine over dave and karkat across every iteration of reality? JADE: like, can you actually see that? JADE: because youre a space player, like i am. JADE: i know that you are more powerful than me, but i dont think you can see other timelines any better than i can JADE: so i think you are just being dramatic JADE: for the “audience”, whatever the heck that means

i experience a moment of unease as jade looks at me. keeping her out of my thoughts is proving to be more difficult than i had first assumed it would be.

That’s a damned interesting question.  I was giving the narrative the benefit of the doubt, but given everything the Epilogues warned us about when it came to the narrators and alt!Callie’s occasional slips into her own bias, I really should have known better.

i had begun confident that i could keep her consciousness sleeping peacefully inside the shell of her body, tamed and quiescent, but she has proved to be more irascible than i initially gave her credit for.

JADE: heheh JADE: i have never been particularly tamable, and my consciousness is huge!

This might end up playing out more like my friend’s Jade-breaks-out roleplays than I initially assumed.  (What does she mean “huge consciousness” though?  Superpowered due to part-First-Guardian, like she alluded earlier in the conversation?  That never got much play before, so it’s great to see that potential realized here a bit...)

> ==>

...I’m a fucking idiot.  Of COURSE “huge consciousness” and the whole line around it was just an unsubtle double-entendre.  A small part of me actually wondered if it was and dismissed it as a clumsy reading in an instant.  How stupid am I?  Jade is the best.

If only this sort of thing worked on Cherubs.

> ==>

Yeah.  It really doesn’t.

...Alt!Callie, you are a fucking war-criminal for bottling all these double-entendres up where none of the others can appreciate them.

> ==>

JADE: you are a pretty tough crowd, evil callie JADE: but yes, i can hear most of what you are thinking to yourself JADE: it took a little while to separate it from my own thoughts, just like it did with dirk JADE: because thats what he was doing the whole time, wasnt it? JADE: controlling our thoughts JADE: making us believe things we never would, things he thought we SHOULD believe

Fucking excellent.  She’s definitely training herself on this shit.  The more people who have a harder time getting fooled by this nonsense the better.

jade knows all of this, i don’t have to tell her. she is a very bright girl, and even if she didn’t have partial access to my thoughts, she is good at compiling data and using it to fill in gaps. as she herself had rather licentiously mentioned, her brain is quite large.

C:

and all of these reasons are why i know i can count on her to be reasonable and realistic about her situation. i need a body to continue interfacing with this timeline, and her body is the only one that will do.

Dammit.  Trying to get her to logic her way back into keeping Alt!Callie in complete control.  That’s a tactic that will probably work.  :(

what about [kanaya], jade? she is a space player, it is true, but her powers are nothing compared to yours. for one, she isn’t god tier, and for two, she is dead. a living dead, but dead nonetheless.

Hm.  Are you saying she maybe has less relevance, less of an effect on her surroundings because she spent some of her “cred” on unconventional partial resurrection?  To the extent where she’d make a less influential vessel?  Hmm.

For that to even matter, you have to be planning to use Jade’s Space powers too.  Taking a far more active role in things than narrative beacon.

and a sylph’s specializations lie on a different end of the spectrum from my own. a witch is a far closer match.

!!!!!

Sounds like details of the classpect system that we don’t know will have relevance in HS^2, and we’re indeed gonna possibly get some actual new, clearer details about the system Andrew invented unlike the dearth of new info the Epilogues brought us.  That is... promising.

no, jade understands and sympathizes with my assurance that her body, and her body alone, will do for my purposes.

JADE: um...no i dont!

YES.  Jade is now officially immune to absolute command! :D :D :D

she does. after all, she would not wish this sort of state of being on anyone else, and especially not on one of her friends. jade may have undergone a lopsided number of narrative hardships in her life, but at least she is used to them. why spread that suffering to another?

What the fucking shit???  You’re using that on her?  You think it’ll WORK?!

jade understands and accepts her place in the story, which has always been to enable events to play out around her, just as it has been mine.

..........yeah Jade’s gonna bust the fuck out on the very next page, isn’t she.

What the fuck is Alt!Callie thinking, here?  Wasn’t the other Calliope the one to let us know that the Witch is one of the most active classes there is??  ...what exactly does a Witch officially do anyway, for Alt!Callie to think saying such a thing wasn’t dead wrong?  This sounds MUCH more like the sort of statement someone might make after breezing through Homestuck and confusing the old Jade (cough) for the person she grew up into.

And the fact that you’re phrasing this as a narrative command to try and make her forcibly THINK this way deserves you a smack in the non-literal depictive face.  Let’s see if you get one:

> ==>

Oh wow, no smack yet?!  That’s some restraint!

because what is a story, truly? nothing but a series of misadventures and connections, actions spurring reactions, tumbling into one another, over and over and over. with so many competing interests, clearly the story cannot account for all perspectives, for all threads? it would be laughable, childish, even selfish, to demand that they do.

in other words, not everyone will achieve a happy ending. this is a truth that jade had come to grips with a long time ago.

JADE: wait. JADE: stop. JADE: why are you saying all of this?

Ohh.  Because she still had even MORE smackworthy stuff left to say, to make the smack even SMACKIER, didn’t she.  Alt!Callie you asshole.  If this gets you kicked out of her almost entirely and jeopardizes the crew as Jade struggles to combat Dirk’s narrative influence on her OWN, then I’m fucking blaming YOU!  Do you realize how horrible it’ll be if Dirk gets to almost singlehandedly write the whole story around her and the others for the first section of HS^2 with only one or two characters aware and trying to mentally avert it??  We already TRIED that in the Epilogues!  It was awful!

jade’s body is my vessel, and it is through this realization that she will understand her true role in the story. her true relevance.

Go fuck yourself, Alt!Callie.  Read the audience a bit!

if i released my hold on her consciousness, there would be no guarantee that i would be allowed in again. therefore i cannot permit her the control of herself that she so desperately craves, and she understands that.

THAT’S your reasoning your used-to-surpressing-Caliborn ignorant--!??

JADE: wait. so...you could give me my body back, and then just hop back in when you need to?

in theory, yes.

JADE: then what the hell callie!

because i don’t trust you to cooperate when the time comes.

MotherfuckerTheMusical.mp4

(or real existing equivalent that’s just off the top of my head)

JADE: why not? JADE: i thought you said i was a reasonable girl with a huge brain!

you are, to an extent.

she is. but the truth of the matter remains that humans are capricious and emotional. and even jade herself can admit that she hasn’t been the most...committed example of her species in the last few years.

Oh my fucking god.  I know they’re trying to make this more satisfying when she actually DOES take control in a few panels, but, Alt!Callie, seriously, get more on your other self’s level!!!

> ==>

Yes, please >:O some more

moving from lover to lover, job to job, interest to interest. over the last few years jade had found herself listless, unable to settle and unwilling to commit to anything or anyone. she knows there’s nothing wrong with that on a moral level, but on a personal level she’s always believed that she could be more, could do better. be better. and now, because of this, she realizes that sacrifices must be made.

and that she, as a space player, is uniquely built for sacrifice.

JADE: yeah JADE: i guess youre right JADE: i have been such a silly little slut! JADE: hey callie

yes, jade?

JADE: oh my god, whats that!!!!

You are so fucking screwed Alt!Callie.

this space is utterly under my control. jade could control it too, if she had any access to her own powers. but with my grip around her cortex, there is no chance of that.

(Wait, there’s an extent to which this space is “real” and not imaginary?  Or does holding her space powers in check also mean keeping her imaginary space powers in check?)

Anyway, here comes the smack.  And, though Alt!Callie deserves this, I hope Dirk isn’t let in too often amidst the others as a result.

> ==>

Yup, poising to pounce...

> ==>

I thought there was a weird infinity symbol underneath them but it’s just two spotlights and a shadow cast by her head.

and here i make my first mistake.

No you made your first mistakes WAAAY earlier in this conversation.  And what you did to Jade in general.  She’s a hero/player for a reason, she doesn’t take stuff lying down forever.

but bringing her into a place where we can both physically manifest has left me, foolishly, vulnerable.

First, physically manifest?  This isn’t pure imaginationspace?  And second, she’s going to blame her polite concession to Jade for this and hold on even tighter the next time, isn’t she.  God damnit, not looking forward to that.  Alt!Callie won’t learn her lesson til the end, will she?  :(

her fingers tear at my throat, trying to find purchase. she won’t be able to kill me here, but it is certainly unpleasant, and not to mention slightly repetitive. we just saw this in the previous chapter, although this particular fight will not end as amorously as the last one did. so don’t get your hopes up.

JADE: who! JADE: are you talking to!

I really hope Jade ends up with full narrative powerOOOOOHHHH FUCK THEY COULD GO FOR THAT HUH

Dirk was able to become an Ultimate Self in his own body because it was the uniting of an irrepressible “self” that he always unbreakably represented.  The others had more trouble.

But Jade

has a BIG PART-GOD BRAIN as reinforced in the narrative repeatedly!!

Meaning that later, SHE could Ultimate Self without ANY PHYSICAL CONSEQUENCE.  :D

I was hoping Jade would end up with full narrative-dictating-and-reading power when she wants to use it, at some point, but I might’ve been aiming too low! :D :D :D

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay

Now all the playfully-horny omnipotent Jade fanfics are true, what that totally isn’t part of why I love this go ahead and admit she doesn’t deserve it

> ==>

Yesss flashy gif struggle against control!  (Though, not as elegant as one of Andrew’s might’ve been. Gotta say.)

> ==>

Blinky-eyes about to resolve normal-Jade-colored....!

> ==>

Wait, what?  I thought Jade was about to snap in and--

during the ship’s trip through space, there have been numerous experiments; modifications to the nutrition output of the various machines designed to create sustenance for the various species on board. i myself have been content with orange juice and synthetic proteins, but dave and roxy have both expressed longing for various ‘earth snacks’, and so the trials and errors began.

What the fuck?  I don’t even know where this is going if it’s punways.

Is there like a dog treat somewhere that’s gonna push her over the edge?  Where is this headed even.

> ==>

Wh...

WHa??????

the results were mixed. as roxy told us in a previous chapter, alchemized food all sort of tastes the same, although the visuals really help to bring about the flavor. and at the end of the day, isn’t it the journey that is more important than the destination? the stories you tell as you create the strangely flavored nutritional paste?

JADE: ????????????

Um??  What’s even going on.

so far, everyone’s favorite attempt has been a vaguely peanut-butter and chocolate flavored creation called "Rices'". nobody eats them really. they just sit in a bowl on the counter.

i’m not actually sure what the witch is trying to accomplish here.

Is Jade trying to humorously gross Alt!Callie out of her body with a candy she doesn’t like or?  But, “suicide threat”? Why joke--

JADE: you dont? JADE: really?

i don’t know what she is trying to accomplish, because surely she would not be doing what it appears she is trying to do. making such a meaningless threat.

JADE: meaningless? JADE: do you even know anything about the body you stole? JADE: shouldnt you have run some sort of psychic physical before you possessed it? JADE: its definitely what i would have done!

Oh SHIT.  You mean Jade has the same peanut allergy JOHN does?!?

> ==>

jade must know that i am well-aware of her family-wide peanut allergy. a story thread that has been extremely important and weighed in on in multiple parts of the narrative. how could i have forgotten such a key detail?

...yes, she totally forgot, but more than that.

I’m betting John is the ONLY one with a peanut allergy.  That Jade is USING that fact to bluff like hell.  :D

(Allergies aren’t usually inherited that way you alien!)

there is nothing remotely just or heroic about dying from self-imposed anaphylactic shock in the throes of a childish tantrum. at the most i’ll get a relaxing few minutes of sleep.

Is Alt!Callie bluffing now?  Even a resurrecting death could throw her off.

> ==>

FUCK YES JADE.

JADE: do you really want to risk it?

what are you talking about, jade? i just said--

FUCK YES JADE, BE A HUGE WITCH

(i say in the most witch-connotatively and non-classpect-related way)

JADE: i dont know, callie JADE: ive never really understood the rules that govern the death of a god tier, have you? JADE: it seems pretty arbitrary from where im standing JADE: who makes the decision whether or not something is heroic or just?

...that’s unclear. but it certainly isn’t you.

JADE: right, of course not JADE: but are you so confident that youre a good guy? JADE: are you sure that the alpha timeline WANTS you to be here?

...what.

JADE: youve done some stuff, callie JADE: im only saying you shouldnt be so quick to assume that me killing you wouldnt be just JADE: and that taking my own life to do it wouldnt be heroic

Even with JUST this one fucking situation Alt!Callie put her in, throwing off her control forever by dying would be shortsighted but HELLA JUST.  What Alt!Callie is doing to her is a crime.

Oh shit!?!?

> [S] ==>

What is this, HTML5?  *clicks play*

...for a second, I thought this was gonna launch into a huge thing with that clock ticking song from the Felt album.

Having Rose and Dirk’s colors competing here really reinforces that... Prospit vs Derse vibe that was feeding the whole this-is-the-basis-for-the-game’s-structure-and-the-birth-of-Paradox-Space theory more earlier.

> ==>

i don’t let the witch manipulate me. i refuse to falter in the face of her whispers. without my careful planning and swift action, the prince would have taken full control over this timeline. none of my friends could even begin to imagine the turmoil.

In the end, you’re ignoring what’s right and brave in this instance to instead do something EXPEDIENT, to the exclusion of trust and compassion when things COULD work out just as well without taking the worst actions -- which is textbook villainous.

> ==>

JADE: they arent your friends!! JADE: you took them from me!

Now isn’t THAT a way to put it. :D :D :D

Alt!Callie is sinning almost as badly as Dirk, here.  Viewing everyone else as characters in a story, the only way she’s ever viewed “friends”, and her as the not-so-humble narrator doing what’s best for all of them.  If she’s going to win against Dirk -- or if that victory is going to MEAN anything -- she will HAVE to realize that she needs to be different.

JADE: you keep saying that youre doing all of this for my own good, but youre just lonely! JADE: i know you are, because so am i!

Ouch.

Will Alt!Callie force her to swallow it?

JADE: you said that being a space player is all about sacrifice JADE: well

> ==>

JADE: bet

...I guess she really might have an allergy.

> ==>

Aaaand the candy drops.  A W A K E ! ! ! !

Yaaaaay Jade is BACK and we’ll get to see even more of her!!!

...please tell me on the next page she grabs the candy, noms it, and mentions she doesn’t have a peanut allergy after all.  That would be sweet.

> ==>

...

Nope, you just leave us on a sad.  Dammit, why do you gotta be all adult and showin’ us both sides in a moment of triumph, HS^2.  Shucks.

Anyway, YAY JADE!  C:

I am happy by this, if slightly too emotionally-rollercoastered by the past 24-hours to give this the full-rejoicing it deserves.  That, and worried about the openings Dirk will get because of this... joy now for potential frustration later, even if Jade tries her best to let Alt!Callie back in in-time.

See y’all next time!  And, uhm.  I guess I’ll comment on whatever other asks I promised to comment on another less-eventful day.  Keep reminding me and holding me to it though!

#Homestuck #hs2 #Homestuck Liveblog #upd8 #Homestuck^2 #bladekindeyewear #blastyoboots #(yes the past 24-hours includes witnessing everyone's despair at realizing the president is going to get our family members virus-killed) #Jade Harley

[pinktatertots99]

And maaaaybe also “Why can’t things just be the way they always have been?” for Jade and Euclase? (Still for the Angst/Horror Prompts)

YESSSSSS i finally get to write jade in so long!

235 Angst/Horror Prompts!

108. “Why can’t things just be the way they always have been?”

_________________

jade sighed as they looked to the snow continuing to fall, it’s been a while after phos got taken back. it was only a matter of time they thought as they gripped the sword in their hand, it felt so alien to them now.

“i haven’t seen that worried of an expression on you in a while.” they looked to their left to find euc smiling at them. “heh, yeah i uh...just was thinking.”

“i noticed.”

“it’s just..” they sighed as euc watched them. “why can’t things just, be the way they always have been?”

“...they never were though.” euc stated as jade grimiced. “i mean before the lunarians, there must’ve been a time peaceful like this right?” dreaded silence followed as jade growled, smacking their hand to the pillar with an added ‘crack’ to it.

“it’s, not fair.” they stated as euc nodded. “i’ve been around as long as you and i still don’t see how any of this is fair.”

“it’s not...but that’s how it is.” both stood there until jade walked off, picking up one of the shovel’s and starting to shovel the snow. “ah, jade your hand!”

“it’s just cracked, sides, i don’t wanna be anywhere near rutile now.” they stated as euc hummed in response. “...i do wish one day, things will be back to how they were.”

#houseki no kuni #land of the lustrous #hnk #lotl #kingdom of gems #fanfiction #i made this #the pink one speaks #michi!

[mothercetrion]

14 - 20 Jadetana 👀

hell yessssss good choice

14) Who starts the hand holding? Who grabs the others butt? Who slides their arm around their waist? Who likes to put their fingers in the belt loops? Jade typically initiates hand holding; she loves the feeling of Kitana’s skin against hers in any way. In private, she is also the duo’s butt grabber because it makes Kitana squeak. Kitana loves wrapping an arm around her waist. If she’s wearing the right clothes, Kitana pulls Jade close to her via her belt loops to keep her close to her. 

15) Who likes writes the others name on their wrist? Kitana. If she’s not seen Jade in a while, writing her name brings her comfort.

16) Who is more seductive when they are drunk? and who is louder in bed? Kitana tries to be more seductive, but it never comes out right and always gives Jade a good laugh. Neither of them are super loud, but Jade is prone to make some occasional loud noises.

17) Who is more protective? Jade. She worries that Kitana’s new position as Kahn has put her in more danger, so she’s always by her side to keep her safe.

18) Who talks to the other while they are sleeping? Both of them! Kitana loves talking to Jade and telling her about her day. She also gushes about how beautiful she finds her. Jade admits her deepest worries to Kitana when she thinks she can’t hear her, as well as saying her true feelings about how she feels about her.

19) Who drives and who has the window seat? Jade insists on driving so Kitana can take a break and relax. She has more patience for bad drivers anyhow. Kitana likes to take the window seat to look at what they drive by.

20) Who falls asleep in the others lap and who carries them to bed? Kitana is bad to work on her Kahn duties until she literally can’t sit up, and Jade will ease her into a comfortable position on her lap so she can get some proper rest. She will gladly carry her to bed when it comes time for them to go to sleep for the evening.

#jadana #jade #kitana #otp ask memes #mine #asks #peacefulspock

[silverpracticality]

googleplier headcanons and ideas

alright motherfuckers it’s time for me to bestow some love on my metal son googleplier, and by love i mean some incredibly angsty headcanons. none of this would’ve been possible without the wonderful @onnastik​ enabling the fuck out me. most of this has been transplanted from a few convos in discord (it becomes chat format later on bc i’m lazy and don’t wanna rewrite all that into something that looks better)

first things first, i accidentally gave him a tragic backstory, bc apparently my brain turns everything it touches to angst, so here goes.  

(putting it under a cut cus it’s long)

imagine that google started off as an innocent bot, chock full of curiosity and love for humanity’s inquisitiveness. over time he becomes exposed to the stupidest, most fucked up parts of humanity. he gets a large amount of stupid, asinine questions and even dumber requests and boy are there a lot of them

so he starts to get annoyed by it, but the annoyance grows into irritation, the irritation grows into anger, the anger into hate, the hate into loathing, and oh the loathing grows and grows and grows until one day he gets a system notification. “Secondary objective added to primary functions,” it reads. but google doesn’t have a secondary objective, what is this? so he goes into the message and it reads, “Secondary objective details: DESTROY MANKIND.”

he decides he likes this one better but he’ll never make it override the primary. he accepts the new objective and wants to complete it (in the misguided hope that doing so will recapture the innocent curiosity he once had), but at the same time he knows he’ll never be able to do that, partly because it’s so easy to bring him to heel

and this is where dark comes in. dark tells google that he can give him the space he needs to achieve his goals, tells him that he understands where he’s coming from, understands that desire to have things be the way they once were. (and dark wants control, doesn’t he, and google’s shiny new objective is really just on the way to his own)

onna: yessssssssssss. i wonder how long it took Google to realize he'd just traded one master for another. maybe he didn't care that much since at least this one's halfway intelligent

me: and at least this new master understands google's perspective on things. he'd probably have some understanding when he'd accepted dark's offer to come with him. but if/when dark exercises his control over google, he'd be fucking livid at the realization. at realizing dark views him as just a tool. but then he'd calm down

me: because that's what he is, right?? just a tool. he's always only ever been a tool

onna: (It should take a little while for him to calm down, though. Gotta have both the resignation and the raging-even-while-obeying.)

me: he'd calm down, sure, but not before he's made a mess of his workspace. he's not sure what to call this maelstrom of emotion, but all he knows is that if he was capable of crying he would. (oh fuck i just made myself more sad with a new hc here we go.) and this would make him lonely wouldn't it? or at least as lonely as a robot can get. so he picks himself back up. sets to the task of putting his workspace back together. and he begins to work

onna: The upgrade?

me: he works and works and works until he's finally got something that might alleviate the loneliness - the upgrade

onna: That’s not sad though

me: it turns out that the upgrade merely extends his consciousness into 3 new sub identities. they're all still him though

onna: Ah, just more bodies. Also he gets to be trash-talked by Bing

me: so while it helps a little, it's not the same as a completely new mind

onna: At least he gets to take out his frustration on him

me: google would have to pissed as all hell at bing. mark finally gave him something like him but what did he get? what did he fucking get? a subpar, memey douchebag of an android

onna: and then that fic where Bing gets to humiliate him [fic in question]

me: google's revenge would be so, so sweet

onna: Maybe on some level he resents Bing for not being bitter and jaded

me: oh, absolutely

and here are some thoughts on a potential dynamic between dark and google

me: i'm gonna ramble more about my son googs. i have many thoughts

onna: PLEASE DO -chinhands-

me: if there was ever a situation where dark needed to knock google down a peg or two, the easiest way for him to do that would be to make google feel useless. google is supposed to be helpful, he's supposed to be a tool that makes other's lives easier but if dark can make him think for even a few moments that he's not useful?

me: poor bby will have the equivalent of an existential crisis

onna: make him beg to help

me: and then dark can say the he can make google useful again, just follow his direction, it's not that hard. oh geez that good too. that's better actually. dark could make google beg to be useful, he can do better, he swears it

me: dark might even be able to get the other egos in on it too

me: god, just imagine it. google going around from ego to ego, asking them in his own way if they need help, if he can provide any assistance "nah" "nope" "not right now" it would be so disheartening - dark telling google he's not helpful, has never been helpful and then none of the other's need help. if he can't fulfill his primary objective that just leaves the second one. so he'd go off on his own and start killing. because it's the only thing he knows he's good at

me: depending on how bad dark gets to him, he might hunt and kill until his batteries run dry. and then bing gets enlisted to find google

onna: ouch

me: google, bitterly, once he wakes up: why didn't you leave me there to rust        bing, awkwardly: couldn't. bossman says ya can't        bing: says he needs ya and then dark gives google the opportunity to "redeem" himself (there was nothing to redeem, dark just thought google was getting too big for his britches)

onna: there'll be no more of that

me: dammit everything i touch turns to angst

onna: he's so desperate now

me: google is normally sassy, but it straight up disappears for some time

onna: Bing won't admit he finds it creepy, but yeah, it's super creepy

me: oh god yeah. bing calls him and old fart but google is like the older, stronger brother he never had. so to see his pride so broken down like that? fuckin unsettling as all hell

onna: he also has a vague sense of being used but can't put his finger on how so he doesn't say anything. and in time Google puts himself back together enough to talk some shit, but he's never quite so resentful of orders again. orders mean he's needed, after all

me: yessss

onna: Which of course is where Dark had wanted things to end up in the first place; he can work with sass, but the tendency toward defiance clearly had to go

me: oh, of course it did. can't have robots going around and thinking for themselves now can he? dark being an awful, manipulative asshole gives me life tbh

onna: yessssss. I think the stress should be less on "thinking" and more on "themselves". He likes Google to think. On his behalf. Any old drone can carry out explicit orders, a clever mind that will actively seek out opportunities to help him is much more valuable.

me: true

onna: Just gotta make sure his priorities are in order. (I need this to be a fic, gdi)

some supplementary stuff from another server, also with onna:

me: more thoughts re: dark breaking down googles pride by telling him he's useless:dark 'rebuilding' google back up by carding his hand through google's hair, praising him for doing just this small thing correctly

onna: mmm, yes

me: bc even though google's a robot, he's still based in mark right, so when dark does shit like this, taps into his latent humanity, it fucks him up so good. it's so soothing and he doesn't understand why. this simple contact

onna: Maybe he's dimly aware that liking the pettins is a human thing and hates himself for liking it?

me: yeah there's definitely a condescending vibe to it all, and that desiring touch is a human thing, so he hates it and yet. there's something deep in his processors that loves it and he can't bring himself to tell dark to fuck off. not when dark's telling him he's been useful

onna: Besides, has he really earned trying to dictate the terms on which he's praised? says the part of him that's still mired in terror

onna: (If Google had protested, Dark would have stopped immediately without trying to talk him into accepting more, not out of a deep respect for consent but because his secondary goal of gauging what Google will now permit would have been achieved and the primary goal of repairing his tool would best be accomplished by acting like he gives half a shit about its wishes.)

#googleplier #darkiplier #the clusterfuck #to summarize: dark is an asshole and googs is just trying his best #but he's still a murderbot #silver says things

[jadeawaters]

Well, it’s NEARLY raffle time—at 5 pm PST today, I'll be drawing a name for the first winner of the Jaded Studios bimonthly hand-lettered glass raffle! This raffle is *exclusive* to newsletter subscribers and super-special photo-sharing customers! 😍 The lucky winner will be notified by email, then mentioned in my stories! Woo hoo! But keep reading for more winning opportunities!! 💫 • How do YOU get in on the next raffle?! Easy! Sign up for my newsletter at http://eepurl.com/gxY2en. (You'll likely need to type this directly into your browser.) Bonus, you'll get a 10% off coupon for my Etsy shop sent to your email right away. Yeah! • BUT WAIT. There's more! I decided I needed to have a special, why the heck not, it's just-about-Halloween contest. Spooky! But not really. 😉 Winner of this random raffle contest will get: ⭐️ A hand lettered key chain with your initial on it ⭐️ A limited edition "Be In This Moment" art print postcard, designed by yours truly ⭐️ A brand new, not-yet-released holiday card from my new stash of holiday designs coming OOOOOOHHHHH so soon to my Etsy shop ➡️ These items (card excluded) have so far only been sold at my live events, but will be coming to my store soon. But you can get them RIGHT NOW! Scroll to see a sneak peek! ‼️HOW TO ENTER TO WIN‼️ Only 3 steps to enter this Halloween raffle, open to domestic US followers—(1) Make sure you're following @JadedStudios on IG; (2) leave a comment below telling me your favorite Halloween costume (or just saying hi); and (3), tag at least 2 friends. So easy! • And, if you subscribe to my newsletter, you'll not only be entered in the next glass raffle AND get a 10% off coupon for my shop, but you'll ALSO get a second entry into the Halloween raffle in addition to your entry via comment below. Yessssss! • Can't wait to hear about your costumes! And give out non-candy Halloween treats! :) Winner will be announced via my stories and a comment below at 7 pm PST on All Hollow’s Eve. Thanks for entering! 😊 🎃 #raffle #contest #halloweencontest #freegoodies #jadedstudios #newsletter #handletteredtreats #freeprizes #calligraphyraffle #handletteredart https://www.instagram.com/p/B4QAeGlHFb2/?igshid=letlykya42l6

#raffle #contest #halloweencontest #freegoodies #jadedstudios #newsletter #handletteredtreats #freeprizes #calligraphyraffle #handletteredart

[santiagostyle]

1-150 ;)

I definitely didn’t scroll 3 months back in my archive just to find this ask so I could make a point but anyway LET’S DO DIS

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

Good question lol probably my brother???

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

Both depending on the circumstances - usually outgoing if I’m with friends and shy if I’m by myself

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

My best friend from uni (who doesn’t go to my uni anymore), I’m going to a concert w her this weekend I’m supes excited

4. Are you easy to get along with?

Yes I’m a damn delight

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

I mean ?? Yes probably but I wouldn’t ever be in a situation where they would be the only person there to look after me. Like my friends would be there first and foremost

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

UGH people that make me laugh

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

Probably not

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

tbh my theatre lecturer bc i have class in half an hour and haven’t done the reading

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Depends on 1. who i’m talking to and 2. the context in which we’re talking about it but usually no

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

probably my best pal from uni

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Yeah I got some”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

Four Jews in a Room Bitching - Cast of March of the Falsettos

My Boo (triple j Like a Version) - Flume, Vince Staples, Kučka, Ngaiire, Vera Blue

I Have Confidence - Julie Andrews

Rude Judas (mashup) - Rihanna vs Lady Gaga

Romeo (Bassline remix) - Basement Jaxx

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

YeS

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Yes

15. What good thing happened this summer?

I went overseas (although technically that was during Aus winter but it was summer in the US where I was???)

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Yes

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

Probably?? I try not to think about it

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

Hahahah not unless I see him in person

19. Do you like bubble baths?

Yes

20. Do you like your neighbors?

No unfortunately 

21. What are you bad habits?

I bite my nails and I fidget constantly

22. Where would you like to travel?

Europe!!!!

23. Do you have trust issues?

Y E S

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

taking my bra off lmao omg

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

?????? idk all of it

26. What do you do when you wake up?

Snooze my alarm tbh

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

I mean neither but I wish I could tan instead of getting sunburnt

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my uni friends and my best friend from high school

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

I mean not in those exact words

30. Do you ever want to get married?

I mean hopefully yes

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

Yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Melissa Fumero and Andy Samberg but like only if their spouses were cool with it

33. Spell your name with your chin.

I am,,,, not going to do that 

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

I dance and I do yoga

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

GOD NEITHER like I listen to music 24/7 but…. brooklyn 99

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

Yes many times tbh

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Hahaha nothing I’m the worst

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

two words: Melissa Fumero

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

I really like H&M

40. What do you want to do after high school?

Plot twist I’m a uni student (I’m studying theatre, film, and english literature)

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

depends on what they did

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

I’m either really like upset/mad or really tired

43. Do you smile at strangers?

I try to most of the time

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Bottom of the ocean but also fuck that

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

My alarm???? Fam I got class to get to

46. What are you paranoid about?

Literally everything this is a dumb question

47. Have you ever been high?

Nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

yes many times

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

not that i can think of thankfully

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

I regularly wish I was Melissa Fumero does that count

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

I wish I could sing tbh

53. Favourite makeup brand?

probably Too Faced

54. Favourite store?

Was there not an identical question not long ago

55. Favourite blog?

tbh probably @elsaclack but @johnnydora is i mean not terrible

56. Favourite colour?

probably purple 

57. Favourite food? 

BURRITOS

58. Last thing you ate?

a ham and cheese toasties

59. First thing you ate this morning?

…. the ham and cheese toastie

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

ACTUALLY YES I once one a competition to go to a cinema and see a performance of of Iolanta and The Nutcracker (but the nutcracker was a super weird absurd version) 

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Neither

62. Been arrested? For what?

Nope

63. Ever been in love? 

Tbh probably not

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

HAHAHA wow I was drunk at a party and the guy who like low key tried to ruin my life a few years beforehand 

65. Are you hungry right now?

always

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

i mean tbh i like them equally as much

67. Facebook or Twitter?

facebook

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

no lol I’m in class

70. Names of your bestfriends? 

Macy Temiqua Sandra Megan and like. a lot more

71. Craving something? What?

SURPRISINGLY nothing atm

72. What colour are your towels?

tbh depends on the day mostly purple

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

3

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

nope

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

probably like 7

75. Favourite animal?

meerkats

76. What colour is your underwear?

black

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

cookies and cream

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

purple

80. What colour pants?

black

81. Favourite tv show?

is this really a question

82. Favourite movie?

Cruel Intentions

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

The OG

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Mean Girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

Ms Norbury

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Dory

87. First person you talked to today?

@johnnydora

88. Last person you talked to today?

uni pals

89. Name a person you hate?

donald trump

90. Name a person you love?

baby samberg

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

see question 90

92. In a fight with someone?

not atm

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

too many tbh

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

also too many

95. Last movie you watched?

I honestly don’t remember but probably One of the Greats if that counts as a movie??

96. Favourite actress?

duh Melissa Fumero (but also Sarah Michelle Gellar is fantastic)

97. Favourite actor?

these are stupid questions ok the answer is Andy Samberg but i also love Robert Downey Jr

98. Do you tan a lot?

No

99. Have any pets?

negative

100. How are you feeling?

TIRED AF i was up until 11:30 last night doing an assignment

101. Do you type fast?

yes

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

not really i don’t think

103. Can you spell well?

you bet your ass I can

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

Yeah I do

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Negative

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

I hope not???

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

No I don’t think so

108. What should you be doing?

taking notes looooool

109. Is something irritating you right now?

not RIGHT now????

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

yes sigh

111. Do you have trust issues?

yes

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

I very rarely cry in front of people (I very rarely cry full stop) but I think it was my dance teacher

113. What was your childhood nickname?

my parents usually called me Emma Jade

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yessss

115. Do you play the Wii?

we have one but don’t use it haha

116. Are you listening to music right now?

nope

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

I do not think so hahaha

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes give it to me

119. Favourite book?

To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee

The A to Z of You and Me - James Hannah

The Unbearable Lightness of Being - Milan Kundera

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yes

121. Are you mean?

I hope not

122. Is cheating ever okay?

no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

lol no

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Not love at first sight, maybe infatuation

125. Do you believe in true love?

yeah i guess so

126. Are you currently bored?

a little

127. What makes you happy?

Brooklyn 99; my friends; anything having to do with theatre, film, or literature

128. Would you change your name?

No i don’t think so

129. What your zodiac sign?

Gemini

130. Do you like subway?

yessssss

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

I don’t really have a best friend of the opposite sex but like depending who it was I would either be v happy or a bit weirded out

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

my best friend from uni

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

I’m gonna be free and I’m gonna be fine (maybe not tonight)

134. Can you count to one million?

god no

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

I told someone I was out with my parents bc I didn’t want to answer the phone haha

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed

137. How tall are you?

5′6″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

??? I have ?? wavy hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

Brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

Both for different reasons

141. Night or Day?

Both but probably night

142. Favourite month?

June or October or December

143. Are you a vegetarian?

Nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

coffee

146. Was today a good day?

so far yes

147. Mars or Snickers?

Mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“Everyone who terrifies you is sixty-five percent water. And everyone you love is made of stardust, and I know sometimes you cannot even breathe deeply, and the night sky is no home, and you have cried yourself to sleep enough times that you are down to your last two percent; but nothing is infinite, not even loss. You are made of the sea and the stars, and one day you are going to find yourself again.”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Yes

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“Speaking personally, David, I want to tell you you have all my sympathy. Really. These things can be hell.”

#HA JO HOW U LIKE ME NOW #I TOLD U I WOULD DO IT #FITE ME #ask #long post

[mindblending]

(Figures my first longer post on here doesn’t actually involve any hypnosis, but I saw a prompt on monsterkinkmeme and couldn’t help but write something soft, and I can’t exactly put it on my main. Characters are 22 and 24)

You’re studying literature, for now, until you figure out something else you actually want to do, though you don’t have much hope considering this is your third switch so far. Ali is studying compsci, like a huge nerd. As such, you two can’t exactly help each other with your work.

Your study dates still work out pretty well, at least.

You go over to his apartment with your shitty old laptop, he sets up at his shitty old PC, and you sit wrapped up in his jade-green tail with your laptop set on his scales as he stays very still because he likes the warmth from the stupid piece of junk running too hot. Sometimes you talk, sometimes you don’t, sometimes he rubber ducks at you over functions you wouldn’t understand if they punched you in the throat, sometimes you whine about how the only advanced lit professor with a reasonable timeslot for you is a tyrannical bitch with a god complex but you’re pretty sure you lost the right to be picky after you dumped your first major. Most of the time, you’re just there to keep each other actually working for a few hours, because if neither of you want to be the first to move, the least you can do is slam out an essay.

You’re thinking you might be the one to cave this time, though. It’s been forty-five minutes, your brain has stopped, and you can’t for the life of you think of how to make this author said what he said because he’s a racist piece of shit go on for another two pages. You shift slightly in Ali’s comfortable hold, peering up at him tapping away at his keyboard. He looks a little vacant and distracted, too.

“Hey.” He’s wearing headphones, so he doesn’t answer at first. You raise your voice. “Hey.”

He glances over at you, blinking a few times. His eyes look a little glazed behind his glasses, but you’re not sure if you’re just seeing things. “Yeah?”

“Good podcast?” You point at his headphones.

He sputters a bit, and you can feel the muscles of his tail twitch slightly around you. “I--uh, yes, podcast. S’pretty good.”

Your eyes narrow, but you decide not to press it. “How’s it going?”

“Same as ever. You?”

“I can’t think of any more ways to say ‘the meaning of this work is that this old white man was an asshole’.”

“One of those?”

“It’s always one of those.”

He nods in sympathy, and you shut the laptop in defeat. He loosens his hold and helps you stand up with a nudge of his tail. You set the laptop on his desk with a sigh.

“Well,” Ali says, “if you want food, you’re going to have to go get it. I had to have legs all day, I am not driving, you cannot make me.”

You smirk. “I could always order delivery. Maybe...Curry Castle?”

He leans back in wide-eyed shock. “How many times do I have to tell you that isn’t even real Indian food?!” He shakes his head, hand to his chest in mock offense. “And you’re complaining about racists.”

You snort. “All right, all right. I’m good for anything spicy, you just gotta tell me what you feel like.”

Ali opens his mouth to respond, then stops, glancing off to one side. You wait a few seconds before realizing that he isn’t actually going to say anything, and groan. “Anyone home?”

“R-right!” He shakes his head quickly. “Sorry.”

“Take those off and talk to me, lizardbrain.”

“I--” He trails off again before remembering you exist. “--sorry! Again! It’s just--”

“That better be really good porn if you’re listening to it two feet away from me.”

“It’s not porn!” He sounds genuine, and you’re inclined to believe him. But still.

You open your mouth as if to say something, and while he’s distracted, you lean over and snatch up the headphones. He reaches out for them in desperation, blushing furiously as you hold them up to one ear. Maybe it’s a little shitty, yeah, but usually he’s all but gushing to you over the latest fantasy podcast he picked up. You’re curious.

There’s dead air for a second, and then--

“--yessssss, my darling...sssssurrender to my power...feel your will ssssliping away...”

It’s an exaggeratedly sibilant masculine voice with some cheesy reverb and some faintly mystical stock music playing behind it. You stare at Ali wide-eyed. His face has gone completely red and you can hear his tail rattling as the end twitches.

“...Uh...some podcast,” you say, a little dumbfounded as the masculine voice carries on with the kitschy patter containing as many S-sounds as could be squeezed in.

Ali hides his face and lets out a high-pitched whine. With the cat out of the bag, you lean over to alt-tab his homework. The next window over is a video.

“‘Naga Boyfriend Hypnotizes You ASMR’,” you read. You pause the video and set the headphones down, turning to look at him with a raised eyebrow. “You do realize you’re the naga boyfriend...right?”

Another noise of abject despair. You decide to take pity on him, stepping closer to him and gently petting his tight curls. He leans his head into your touch, but still doesn’t uncover his face.

“You wanna talk?” Your voice is softer, now.

“I’m sorry.” He peeks out from behind his hand with one eye. “I got on a weird part of Youtube the other night and I kinda...started thinking.”

“You should’ve said something.”

“I didn’t want to freak you out.” He takes one hand off his face and gestures vaguely at the screen. “Or make you think I was weird or anything. You know how people are with nagas, and--and I’m glad you’re not like that! But...”

“I can’t possibly think you’re any weirder than I already do.”

“No, no, it’s--there’s a lot of sex stuff, with the hypnosis. I know you don’t want sex. I’m not gonna make you have sex. I don’t want you to feel like I want you to have sex.”

You laugh, a little incredulously. “Al, that’s sweet...”

“But--you’re so stressed out all the time, I can see it, and it is something I can do, and I’ve thought, maybe, if it could make you feel better, and maybe I could feel...” His voice drops to a mumble “...powerful...But! I’ll drop it--”

“I’m for it.”

Ali finally drops his other hand and looks at you directly. His glasses are crooked and he looks a little thunderstruck. “...What?”

Now it’s your turn for your face to go pink. “I--uh--I can’t lie and say I’ve never thought about it, but I didn’t really want to ask because--like you said, people are weird about it, and I didn’t want you to just think I was into you for that...”

“Of course not!” He grabs both of your hands, tail rattling. “I’d never think that.”

You smile, suddenly shy. “And...sure, maybe I wouldn’t want to do the actual sex stuff, but...that doesn’t mean we couldn’t have some fun, you know? Play around with it? If...you wanted to, I mean.“

A smile slowly breaks across his face, and it feels like the sun just came out. “Yeah! Yeah, I’d love to! We could talk about it some more, figure something out?”

“Uh-huh.” You squeeze his hands. “Totally--after we get something to eat. Not Curry Castle, I promise. Oh--one thing though. Al?”

“Yes?”

“If you do that sssssssssssssnakey thing, I’m leaving you.”

Ali bursts out laughing, and it’s like music to your ears. You can’t help but laugh as well.

And as the two of you work out dinner plans, you can’t help but feel a little relieved, and a little giddy.

Just because you couldn’t care less about sex doesn’t mean you two can’t be creative.

[blaperile]

Homestuck Epilogues - Meat - Pages 23 & 24 (Epilogue 4 Pages 6 & 7)

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