uchihaclansslutt - Tumblr blog

uchihaclansslutt · 2 years

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i have writer's block so instead of writing for teotw, i'm feeding everyone with one-shots and drabbles :) plus, this oneshot has been on hold ever since this summer 😭 just had to complete it

mr.reckless; terushima yuuji

things to know: one-shot, fem!reader, fluff, angst, idk theyre in college ig, mcd, lowercase intended, suggestive language, the concept of futakuchi, daishou and teru being friends, ending's heavily inspired by in another life

you were pissed. so fucking pissed.

you were heading back to your dorm building after a late swim practice when you jolted and hit your steering wheel. someone had crashed into the rear end of your car. it wasn't serious but it was enough to cause your lip to bleed.

immediately, some rather tall guy with an undercut and dyed blond hair approached your door. he knocked on your window and you proceeded to roll it down. you noted that he was your age.

upon taking a better look at him, you noticed he had multiple ear piercings, a typical black, frat boy zip up and rings flooding his fingers. there was no denying he was attractive regardless of how much it was taking for you to not run over him.

"i am so, so, so sorry," he apologized profusely. you noticed his almond-coloured eyes gazed down to your bloody lips. he squirmed—not literally but his face showed it.

he pointed at the wheel with his eyes and back to you. "was that because-"

"yes. it was," you continued for him, touching some of the blood with the tip of your fingers. you looked away from him in order to find a wipe to clean your hands that were now coated in red.

to your surprise, the new person you just encountered happened to have a tissue in his pockets. who knows how long it's been in there for. he gestured for you to place your hand in his and he cleaned the blood off your fingertips. not so long after, he proceeded to wipe the blood off your lip using his thumb.

his actions made you smile. it also left you an open opportunity to tease him for it. "so you crashed into my car and now you're trying to seduce me?"

you decided you weren't going to report the minor accident because he was about your age. you weren't aware of his financial status or anything but you knew how annoying college fees were already, this could have just made things worse for him.

but, if you weren't going to give him a hard time with the crash, you definitely were going to torment him using this.

"huh?! do i look like that kinda guy?" he raised a brow and was taken back, looking a tad bit offended.

you shot a look at him, head-to-toe. he had grey sweatpants on, the black zip-up and rings you noticed earlier, you also saw a tongue piercing amongst the other piercings. you stared for a moment before nodding. "yeah. you do," you deadpanned.

before he could retaliate, one of his friends from his vehicle started yelling. "teru, are you done yet!?"

"yeah, one second!" he responded. he pulled out his phone and held it in front of you. "what's your number? we'll talk about this later, yeah?"

you took it from him and dialled your number, giving it a missed call. "what's your name?" you asked in order to create a contact.

"yuuji. terushima yuuji."

it was very faint but you were sure you've heard it. you pondered for a moment, "terushima yuuji, huh? i've heard the name before, i just can't figure it out."

terushima chuckled a bit before walking backwards from your vehicle. "i have a lecture with you. pay attention to your surroundings, princess."

you stuck your head out the window as he jogged back to his car. "says the one who hit a car!"

he shared a smile with you one last time before driving away.

you got out of your car to see the damages. it wasn't that bad, besides the fact your hood was severely dented. it shouldn't be a problem.

the next day, you ended up getting to class using uber. you decided to get in touch with terushima before you figured out what you wanted to do with your car.

just as you were about to text him about the minor crash, you felt someone's presence beside you. well, they wanted to make it clear they were near you.

speak of the devil—there he was. this must've been the class he was talking about.

"i was just about to text you," you said, showing him your phone.

yuuji made an 'o' with his mouth while taking his bag off his shoulder to take out his books, "missed me?"

you tried your best to suppress your facial expressions. now that was stupid. "no," you grinned. "have you forgotten you messed up my car? i was just going to ask if you knew a place that could fix that."

"i know a place. here, how about we go down there tonight," he offered politely. "i got the expenses covered though."

you smiled. he was nice, you felt bad for assuming he was a typical frat boy. well, he could act like one sometimes. "thanks. but there's no need, i promise-"

he cut you off. "nope. like you said, i'm the one that did it. i mean, paying for the expenses- it's the bare minimum." before you could argue, the professor came in and the class began.

the lecture was three hours long, like always. however, it wasn't so bad because the stupid blond was beside you.

at one point, he stopped taking notes and intentionally disconnected to wifi just so he could play that dinosaur game. what a dork.

terushima also ended up sending you imessage games throughout the lecture. you swore, you would've diverted your attention to your professor if she hadn't gone over this lesson before.

you greeted your professor goodbye and headed out alongside terushima. it was evident his friends were around the corner as they dressed similarly and were loud as shit.

"text me the address. i'll get there on my own," you reminded him before trying to walk away.

he gently grabbed your wrist and pulled you back. "huh? no, you send me your address and then follow my directions."

you sighed. "terushima, i refuse to let you pay."

"do you want you car fixed or not?" you didn't reply, he took your silence as an answer. "good. i'll see you tonight at your place then."

you hated this. you never wanted this to be more complicated than it actually was—and it wasn't. you nodded and the two of you were about to go your separate ways untill you heard him yell across the hall.

"oh, and! call me yuu instead!"

you did as he said. you sent him your dorm building's address as soon as you got back. you decided to finish any pending assignments or notes before he came.

you got the text as soon as you finished showering too.

'I'm outside'

rushing out your room, you got onto the lift and outside to see him. you unlocked your vehicle and started following him.

you trailed his jet black, matte corvette into the night. part of you thought you were being too generous by refusing to let him pay for the damages he caused.

the two of you reached this garage surrounded by diners, gas stations, restaurants, convenience stores, anything that would fit the aspect of a boring city.

you two walk in and you're greeted by a beautiful guy. he had brown, messy, straight hair and the same coloured eyes.

"my man! this is..." he started but paused immediately. he leaned down to whisper in your ear, "i don't know your name."

you closed your eyes shut. what the fuck. "it's-"

"oh hey l/n. it's been a while," the brown-haired guy smiled.

"hey kenji," you replied with a reciprocating grin.

terushima's eyes widened, "this is l/n and i need you to fix her car," he said, now holding onto kenji's hands. "please, please, please."

you stood there in disbelief. you almost laughed honestly. he didn't know your name and only repeated it after futakuchi did.

you've known futakuchi kenji for a while now. you went to high school with him. you two weren't close but you were associated with a similar friend group, therefore, it made him your acquaintance.

"where's the car?" he asked. he got lead by you to your car. terushima spiked a conversation with him while getting there.

he glared at the car, back to you and back to yuuji. "you did this, didn't you?" terushima nodded slowly and nervously. futakuchi sighed, "it'll take some time to fix that up. maybe a week, maybe more."

"that's fine by me. i'll uber," you complied.

once again, terushima felt bad for the inconvenience he caused. "what? no? i'll drop you off to your classes. i mean, we have some in common."

"well, there you go! i'll get daishou and the other boys to start on it," kenji stated before either of you could argue again. "teru, it's 130,000 yen. stop fucking up cars."

"sorry kenji," he apologized, dragging the 'sorry' like a child.

he chuckled, "it's for your safety. otherwise i could care less. i mean, you're keeping us in business with your recklessness."

that was one thing about futakuchi. he always knew how to lighten the mood and everyone appreciated him for it. even if he was a prick sometimes.

you got into terushima's car—no. he opened the passenger door for you and offered to drive you home, again.

"where are you getting 130,000 yen from?" you asked curiously while the answer was quite literally in front of you.

his corvette's interior looked like it was the latest model. he had money coming in from somewhere.

"uhh," he started, trying to sound as modest as he could. "my parents are kinda rich? i mean i work too, but they don't let me use my money. it's in my savings for more important investments i guess."

that was nice of them. you'd wished you started saving your money to invest in your future. "where do you work?"

"at an ice cream parlour. i've been working there ever since high school." his lips were slowly curling into a smile. "i like the people there. especially this one old lady that comes in."

you've never seen this side of terushima. ever since you encountered him (which wasn't so long ago), you just thought of him as a playboy because of how he presented himself.

you weren't necessarily wrong. he was one. but he just didn't seem to be the kind of guy that worked at an ice cream parlour when he was practically loaded.

"is it open right now?" you asked.

he nodded, "24/7."

"take me there, i want some ice cream."

the two of you arrived at this small ice cream parlor. it looked plain on the outside but as soon as you walked in, there was colour everywhere.

black and white tiles, pink, red and purple seats, red booths. it was well organized too, definitely put a lot of thought behind it.

"hey! hana, kazuma!" yuuji called to the two people working there.

hana had short brown hair accompanied by short bangs as well. her eyes were the same colour as her hair. she was very well put together and seemed quiet as she nervously waved back.

"hey teru."

kazuma on the other hand was the opposite. he was much taller than her and had messy brown hair. he had a smug look on his face.

terushima pulled out a chair in one of the booths. "take a seat."

you did as he said while kazuma came along not so long after. "you guys wanna order something?"

"just get me a vanilla scoop and um.." he paused and looked at you. "what do you want l/n? name whatever, we have it."

you wanted to challenge his statement so you tried to think of an ice cream you don't usually see at parlors. "mocha macchiato?"

you eyed terushima. he had his hands holding up his chin while he looked at kazuma. you saw him glance at you before looking back at his friend.

"coming right up."

kazuma left and yuuji could not keep his eyes off you. "caffeine fiend?"

you smiled, "oh, of course i am. the worst."

"just letting you know though," he smirked, "starbucks is nothing compared to this place."

"yeah? i won't doubt it."

his friend came back with the ice cream rather quickly. "vanilla for you and a mocha macchiato for the pretty girl."

terushima scrunched his brows at his friend and kicked him from underneath the table. it got him to scurry off, but as he did, he was giggling.

before you tasted the ice cream, terushima stopped you. "say," he begun. you can tell he had some ulterior motive as his smile looked malicious. "if you like the ice cream, how about you go on a date with me?"

you looked at him and the ice cream in your grasp. "thats a little unfair, don't you think? everyone likes ice cream."

you swirled the dessert with your spoon and picked it up, moving the spoon closer to yuuji's mouth. "plus, i think i can consider this as a date," you smiled.

he was stunned. you were just as smooth as terushima was and he loved the energy you returned.

"she has more game than you do!" kazuma yelled as hana snickered beside him. the both of them were watching you the entire time.

what made you laugh though was how offended terushima looked. "you're gonna catch it."

the two of them chased each other around the empty ice cream parlour.

hana walked up to the booth and sat across from you. "i think he really likes you," she mentioned.

you brushed it off. "pfftt. i don't think he's serious."

"i think he is," she continued. "don't take this the wrong way but he's been with a lot of girls. he's never brought any of them here except for you."

you kinda expected he'd have a lineup of other girls. it was pretty obvious. but what hana told you did make you feel a tad bit more special until you remembered. "i asked him to bring me here though."

"it makes no difference, l/n. he told you where he works, he never does that." she smiled at you, "he likes you. he's your dumbass now."

and hana was right. he was head over heels for you.

after leaving the parlour, yuuji confessed you had his attention way before the minor accident.

it made you wonder why he would be so interested in you. it's not like you were noticeable, you never attended parties, neither were you popular. all you did was sit in class and take notes. you also just happened to be on the swim team but it was never anything more than that.

you didn't think you were special, but he still made you feel as if you were.

terushima insisted on dropping you off again. he parked in front of your dorm building. "here we are."

"i had fun today. after a really long time actually," you said. "thank you for everything terushima."

"i told you to call me yuu, l/n."

"okay yuu," you exaggerated while smiling. "you can call me y/n."

the both of you were closer than you realized. still sharing smiles, he graced your cheek. you looked down at his lips and back into his sparkling almond eyes again.

you tilted your head a little and he did the same. before you knew it, you slowly attached your lips to his. the prolonged tension and compatibility led to this moment.

he cupped your face with both his hands as yours rested on his chest. you could've sworn you felt his heart beating rapidly—it was insane. you could taste the hint of vanilla ice cream on his lips as the two of you moved in sync, passionately kissing each other.

"hi," he smiled once you two pulled out of the long lasting kiss.

you were trapped in his eyes. they were so bright you could see your reflection in them. you accidentally glanced at the time projecting in his car and didn't think it would be so late. 2:22am. time passed by so quickly around him.

you lightly tapped terushima's chest and laughed. "look at the time."

he let go of your cheeks and sighed while tilting his head back. his jawline was a sight to see.

"please drive safely. i'll see you tomorrow." you kissed his cheek one last time before leaving. "good night, yuu."

you were his, at last.

terushima and you had been dating for approximately a year, a little more. he changed his ways for you and adapted to whichever schedule you had.

you did the same though. you decided to start getting out of your comfort zone for him, started befriending his friends such as futakuchi, daishou, and kazuma. you were naturally closer with hana though because you were both sick of the boys' shenanigans.

you started letting your social butterfly loose again. along with being a top student, you learned how to balance your extracurriculars and personal time all thanks to terushima.

he would get you to tag along with him to parties he'd been invited to, even if he wasn't allowed a plus one.

you were grateful for him.

terushima yuuji was probably the best thing that had ever happened to you.

"you look good," you called out seeing your boyfriend dressed a slight bit decent. terushima looked good regardless, it was a part of his charm.

"hey," he greeted, pecking your lips quickly. "i'm going out, it's kazuma's birthday today. i know you don't really like parties but do you wanna come with me?"

"i'd love to yuu, but i have a shit ton of work to do tonight." you felt bad for declining the offer. you genuinely wished you could go out with yuuji but you couldn't afford to do so. you had a huge test the next day and a lot of cramming to do.

"tell him i said happy birthday though," you smiled.

he returned it. "i'll stop by later if you're still awake. i love you-"

your eyes widened and his did as well. you weren't expecting to hear it coming from him.

"shit," he cursed, thinking your reaction was a negative one. "it just came out, i'm sorry. you don't have to-"

you shut him up by pressing your lips on his. it eased him and you could tell by the way his hands naturally found your waist.

"stop freaking out yuu." you held his face close to yours. he smiled against your skin, glad he didn't mess anything up between you two. "i'll see you tonight. have fun and stay safe, okay?"

he kissed you again before walking out the front door. you waved and he did the same back.

you honestly didn't even realize when you fell asleep. the first thing you did was turn your phone front side up again to check the time. 3:43am.

shit. you had a few more hours until your test and you fell asleep in the midst of studying.

not to mention, you were supposed to see teru as soon as the party was over.

you felt so bad for falling asleep on him. you unlocked your phone to check if he sent you anything, but there was nothing there.

well, you didn't have to feel bad anymore. perhaps the party didn't end yet. but considering it was a wednesday, you'd assume terushima would be a little more responsible to come back earlier.

you weren't bothered though, it was one of his best friend's birthday anyway. you completely understood.

it wasn't until a few seconds later when other texts started flooding your phone.

why?

the first chat you decided to read was kazuma's. you thought you were going to see videos or pictures of your boyfriend being stupid, if not, a 'thank you' after you wished him happy birthday.

but oh, you were so wrong.

'something bad happened y/n'

'answer your phone'

'please'

'teru got into an accident'

you quickly checked your call log and saw kazuma called you twenty-seven times. you slept through it all.

the second chat you looked through was futakuchi's.

'i'm so sorry y/n'

no. this couldn't be happening. your hands couldn't stop shaking.

you quickly called kazuma. he didn't pick up until the second call. "kazuma, please tell me this is some sick joke."

his voice was shaking and he was definitely crying. "y/n, you need to come to the hospital right now. it's bad."

"i'm on my way." you got up as fast as you could, not bothering to change or grabbing a coat. you snatched your car keys off the table and ran out the room.

you couldn't afford to get on the lift, it would've taken way too much time so you ran down the stairs. "kazuma, are you still there?" he responded, thankfully he refused to get off the phone with you. "you have to make sure yuu's awake. at least until i get there, please."

he heard how desperate you were over the phone—the sounds of you running down floors, your keys jingling and your breath becoming staggered as you cussed.

you got into your car and rushed to the hospital kazuma told you to reach. "what exactly happened? please be honest with me."

"i'm so sorry y/n-"

"kazuma! snap out of it and stop saying sorry. nothing's going to happen to him," you yelled. "tell me what the fuck happened."

he sniffled, "he left the house at around 1am. w-we were watching him up until the lights. when they turned green, he slowly started driving again b-but a truck just collided into him at full speed."

your eyes started getting watery. "please tell me he wasn't drinking."

"i swear, he was sober. he was telling me he was gonna see you after so he can't drink," kazuma explained. "but i think he was looking at his phone too. maybe texting you. i don't know- i don't know what to do y/n."

your heart sunk and tears were falling onto your lap. you tried getting there as fast as you could—speeding, overtaking cars, shortcuts, anything that would get you there sooner.

he couldn't die on you. not like this. you still didn't tell him you loved him.

hospital parking lots and their fees pissed you off. you just needed to get in there as soon as you could so you parking at the side of the road, not caring about getting a ticket.

you practically sprinted into the hospital and reached the hall kazuma and the other's were located.

"where is he," you said quickly.

kazuma pointed weakly at the door across the hall. you walked towards it and peeked through the window.

there he was. terushima was surrounded by multiple doctors as they tried to stop the bleeding and trying to see if he'd wake up. he was in horrible shape to say the least.

you stepped away from the door, you can no longer look at your boyfriend in that position. it was killing you on the inside.

you slid down the wall and broke into tears. futakuchi and another friend of his and terushima's sat next to you.

he didn't know how to comfort you, but futakuchi sat next to you and pulled you into a hug. "he wouldn't wanna see you like this y/n."

kenji was right. you knew he was but the thought of terushima being in a critical situation in between life and death was tormenting you. you hated how you couldn't do anything to help him out of this mess.

if only you got out of your comfort zone and went to the party with him. the work and test did not matter to you anymore, you just wished you went with him.

maybe he wouldn't be in this shitty hospital right now.

hours passed by and no one came out of the operating room. it was starting to make you anxious but you knew you just had to wait this one out.

on the other side of the room, you took a good look at the other friend. you recognized the guy that resembled a snake.

it was daishou suguru, another person that was at the garage the same night you and terushima were consulting futakuchi. he also happened to previously go to school with you.

you were surprised you didn't notice him around and felt horrible about it. "sorry, hey daishou. i didn't see you there."

he opened his eyes again, he seemed to have been praying discreetly because he definitely was not napping. "don't worry about it. you were stressed."

down the hall, you saw kazuma pacing around. kenji and suguru looked in his direction and understood your concern. ultimately, daishou went to go calm him down as well because futakuchi was taking care of you.

it wasn't long until the doctors came out. they'd been in there for hours working nonstop trying to save terushima's life.

you eagerly got up and looked at the doctor waiting for an answer.

"we're sorry. he didn't make it."

you stayed in bed, heartbroken in despair for a week. you didn't want to face anyone or attend class anymore—you knew that empty seat in class would cause you an excelling amount of pain.

hana would bring over food for you because she knew you weren't eating properly. she'd often bring kazuma with her so the both of you can heal together.

kazuma couldn't look you in the eyes for a while. he thought it was his fault while you thought it was yours. you had to have a conversation with him one-on-one for him to finally get over the guilt.

daishou and futakuchi would come over together. they'd come over to check up on you and usually ended up making you smile the most with their snarky and rude comments towards each other.

you missed him. you missed his smile that lit up the room, his eyes you would find yourself getting lost into, his presence that eased your soul. you would do anything to see him again.

you finally slept well after an entire week, but it came to an end when you jolted in your sleep.

you had a dream—a dream about yuuji.

your head was aching and your eyes were barely open. you turned to your front desk and looked at your phone. 4:44am.

when you turned around aiming to fall asleep again, you were startled by a figure.

it was blurred but you could make it out pretty damn well. terushima yuuji.

he had the same sparkling eyes, the same beautiful smile, his healthy hair was still in tact, and his touch felt so real.

he placed a hand on your jaw, caressing your cheeck gently.

you smiled at terushima, a single tear slid down your cheek and onto your pillow. you saw him scrunch his brows and shake his head in disapproval as he wiped the tear stain away.

"i love you," your voice trembled. "i love you so much yuuji."

he smiled ever so dearly.

"thank you for loving me, y/n."

#terushima yūji #terushima #terushima fluff #terushima angst #terushima oneshot #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #terushima x y/n #terushima x reader

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uchihaclansslutt · 2 years

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the end of the world ↠ jean kirstein

chapter seven; secrets

"Huh? Why would it be full of walkers?" Jean questioned, still in disbelief.

"I wouldn't fucking know!" Sasha answered, still a little out of breath. "I peeked into a gap and was looking at one dead in the eye. There were a bunch of them in there though and I'm getting a really bad feeling about it."

She sighed. "I just followed where all that noise was coming from, I've been hearing it ever since they took us. I got curious! You can't blame me."

"I got a bit curious when she told me too," Armin defended, "That's why I went with her."

The group continued to question Sasha and Armin while you stayed behind the wall, trying to justify why Levi and them would have a barn full of walkers. It made no sense to you. They all seemed so wise, they couldn't have walkers in a barn when they're fully aware of what's going on.

It was definitely a mistake or something they aren't aware of. You thought about it for a moment and realized it couldn't be a mistake. Erwin told you all to not go near the barn—he's aware of it and warned the group intentionally. You couldn't wrap your head around why they would keep literal zombies stored near them.

You heard Connie yawn, "I'm just offended you two didn't bring me along." Of course, he'd say something like that. Marco slapped his neck, reminding him he needs to be serious. "Ow! What? I'm just saying-"

"Armin wouldn't be able to handle two idiots at a time!" Jean exclaimed, clearly offending two individuals.

"What?!" They shouted in unison. Sasha and Connie completely forgot about what the group was previously talking about. "Calling us idiots when you're just as intolerable."

"Horse face," Connie coughed underneath his breath.

Jean scoffed, "You're saying that as if it's a bad thing." He walked up to Connie and provocatively got in his face. "Wanna know what else is horse sized?-" Oh god. You'd think Jean would be a bit more collected but nope, they're all idiots.

Their bickering and your thought process came to a halt when someone else spoke up. A soft, feminine voice.

"Would Y/N know something about this?"

Why were you being dragged into this?

You heard Avni's voice for the first time after you woke up again. "Why would she know anything about this? She's sleeping right now, and she's just as new as we are." She was defending you while you weren't technically there.

"Look, I'm just saying. She talked to Levi for nearly two hours. I think she probably knows something."

After hearing the tone Avni used, you figured out whose voice it was. There were two people she didn't like in this group, Tyler was out of the equation which left with one other. It was Valerie. She sounded agitated and after hearing her a little more, it sounded like she was trying to put you on the spot by framing you.

Everyone turned their heads to Avni and Jean. Their eyes felt like daggers as they stared the two down, almost demanding an answer from one of them.

"I don't like how you guys aren't trusting her." The room got quiet and you can feel how tense it was.

"Avni, it's not that we aren't trusting her, I promise. Valerie just... has a point." Marco tried to clear the air before anyone said the wrong thing.

"But think about it," Jean spoke up again, "If she knew anything about that barn, she would've told us."

"We don't doubt it," another soft-spoken voice reassured. "Maybe she forgot, or it slipped her mind. She looked like she had some other things she was worried about too." It was Mikasa. She sounded concerned and you can just hear from the sound of her voice that she looked worried for you as well. "We could just ask-"

"Or, maybe she looked stressed because she's keeping this whole barn thing a secret." Valerie took Mikasa's comment the wrong way. She added more fuel to the fire by throwing you under the bus again, all while you weren't there.

The thought of no one trusting you enraged Sasha as well. She remembered how irritating it felt when no one believed her about the barn. You weren't even here to defend yourself which pissed her off even more. "Valerie, can you shut the fuck up?"

For a second, you thought you might've had a conversation about the barn with Levi but forgot. The conversation upstairs made you doubt yourself a bit. All you remembered was finding out you're an Ackerman and your mom being your host. Your memory was a bit hazed, only because it entirely fucked with your head. You haven't cried like that ever since you were about thirteen—and you're twenty now.

You didn't know if you were supposed to come out of the stairwell. If someone caught you right now, it would look sketchy and as if you're eavesdropping. Coming up right now wouldn't look good either but you didn't want to stress them out even more.

You slowly walked up a few steps and joined the rest of the group. Their eyes shot towards you. "Hey."

After a moment of silence, someone finally spoke up. "You okay, Cat Lady?" Connie asked, looking a little worried which was odd coming from him. For a moment, you thought someone mentioned something about your breakdown and felt embarrassed.

"Of course I am." You answered. Everyone still looked unconvinced. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You look like shit," Eren replied. You figured he probably didn't have any ill intent.

"Wow, thanks, Jaeger." You tied your hair up while some chuckled in the living room.

Sasha pulled you so she could sit near you. She sat down on a chair, facing away from everyone while you sat on the dining table, still beside her.

"What are we talking about?" Although you knew everything they were talking about and how some people doubted you, however, you didn't want it to look like you were eavesdropping.

"The barn's full of walkers," Armin repeated. "We wanted to know if you knew anything about it... You know, considering you were alone at the farmhouse for a while."

You shook your head, "I don't know anything about it. Sorry-"

"Then why were you in there for so long?" Valerie barged again. She was starting to piss you off. It was as if she was trying to start drama, or as if she wanted everyone to turn against you.

You didn't quite know what to answer. You did mention you spoke about your bloodline and how your mother was your host but you didn't want to get in-depth about it again. "We were talking about the Ackerman clan. Nothing else."

"For two hours?"

You were getting tired of the interrogation, although you should've expected it when you decided to come up. "Yeah, for two hours. Anything else you wanna know Valerie?"

"You're awfully calm about this Y/N." She pointed out. "Why's the barn full of walkers?"

You raised a brow, "You seriously think I know why they have walkers on their land?" It confused you as well, but at least you knew how to keep your composure in front of others. "They have doctors and scientists in their group. Maybe they wanna figure something out about this whole thing, I don't know, it's a wild fucking guess."

Levi might have hinted the barn could be full of walkers, therefore you tried to remember your entire conversation with him. You had your head down but could feel everyone glaring at you as you went into a deep thought process. All of a sudden, you remembered one thing Levi mentioned.

"I would've killed you back there in the farmhouse if I didn't recognize you."

Was it possible they would've killed you all in such a gruesome way? Just the thought of it sounded so inhumane. Feeding humans to walkers.

You liked the other group, not all of them but most of them. You didn't want to tell everyone what you thought because you got attached to Levi and enjoyed the presence of the others, like Hange and Moblit.

However, as much as you like the other group, you owed loyalty to this one. They saved your life without hesitation and treated you like family even though they could've left you to die. You took a deep breath in and out, "I don't want to jump to conclusions," you said, soft-spoken, "But maybe they were planning on killing us."

You lifted your head to see confused faces, some even looked furious. You shook your hands, "Not any more of course! I'm just saying, we were on their property without their permission at first."

Everyone looked as if you were crazy. You felt the need to convince them to not worry about anything until you get answers directly from them. You had a feeling things wouldn't end well because of this—you didn't want anyone to kill each other because of assumptions, miscommunication and fear.

"They're good people. I was in there alone for two hours and left without a scratch. They're letting us stay on their land and even allied with us," you conveyed. "They didn't need to. Shit, they could've killed us that morning but they didn't."

Valerie sat across from you, on a sofa in between Mikasa and Jean. "You sound like you're defending them."

Okay, you had enough of her. Sasha could see the frustration on your face and your body language let her know you were going to confront Valerie. She placed her hand on your thigh, snapping you out of fury.

You nodded and gently took Sasha's hand off your thigh. You proceed to slowly get off the table, however, still kept your body weight against it. You weren't going to make a scene or cause the group any trouble. You crossed your arms, "And you sound like you have an issue with me. What's up? What's your fucking problem?"

"I don't trust you," she said bluntly. "And I don't think anyone else should either."

You rolled your eyes, almost letting out a laugh. You looked around to see if anyone would agree with her however, it seemed everyone started giving her nastier stares instead.

Mikasa moved away when she heard Valerie say this and Jean had an intense look on his face again, one you were all too familiar with. Avni had a brow raised, you also heard Sasha curse underneath her breath.

Everyone in the room believed you and you couldn't wish for more. You decided you'd go back downstairs and be the bigger person. You wanted to talk to Levi tomorrow morning before you made any more assumptions about this barn situation.

"Why'd you make a scene?" Dan asked Valerie once you weren't in the living room anymore. "It was unnecessary."

"I wasn't trying to make a scene. I'm sorry if it came off that way," she clarified in a hushed tone, "I just think she knows something about the barn. That's all."

"But why?" Sasha questioned. "She was being honest, I could tell. Plus, it's not like she's done anything."

Valerie tried to continue sugarcoating how much she disliked you. She masked her issue in a soft-spoken manner and hoped it would turn everyone against you somehow. "You don't know tha-"

"Okay that's enough for tonight," Jean exhaled while getting up from the sofa, intentionally cutting the ginger off. "It's going to be a long day tomorrow. Good night everyone."

Jean was the first to go back downstairs to you, the rest followed his orders and slowly started to exit the living room, making their way into their bedrooms. Everyone was too tired and conflicted to notice two people stay behind.

"What the fuck was that?" Tyler whisper-yelled.

Valerie scoffed, "Oh shut up Ty. I was trying."

"And failed miserably," he retorted. "You'll need to do better if you wanna separate them. They look like they fucking hate you now."

"They don't. I fucked up but at least realized it before it was too late. They'll still see me as the weak, innocent, cottage girl," she air-quoted before turning to Tyler and snapping again. "I don't see you trying to do anything about this!"

He rolled his eyes before getting up from a chair, "Worry about yourself, I have something in mind. Just get your shit together. You won't be able to keep the good girl act for so long if you keep acting out."

"And that's coming from you?" Valerie scolded before walking away. "Fucking moron."

"I'm just trying to help you. You'll never be able to get Y/N out of the way like this."

She stood at the stairs, looking down at him. "Get on at least someone's good side first, asshole. Then we'll talk."

Valerie made her way upstairs, leaving Tyler in the living room all by himself. He kicked the sofa in anger. He never really liked Valerie from the very beginning, he just tolerated her because of her sister, Jessie.

From what he recalled, Valerie would only want her way and would do anything to make sure she has what she wanted. She was stubborn, immature and closed-minded. There was no way of knowing what she'd do if she didn't get her way. A lot of the time, she used her skill of manipulation, if not, her beauty.

Though Valerie was beautiful, she had a horrible personality. She had this fake persona—the innocent, kind girl everyone likes. Some would even call her a bimbo, but little did they know she'd have them wrapped around her finger rather than the other way around.

She pissed him off. He knew he'd have to work with her to get what he wants, otherwise, he'd always be unsuccessful. A part of him also felt guilt and regret. Eventually, he started realizing it was his fault Jessie died. He should've been able to protect her and the child she was carrying. His way of thinking most likely changed because of Valerie but he couldn't accept it. The weight of her sister's death was still on his shoulders—he had to help Valerie because he needed to make amends.

Jean found you downstairs with Luna in your lap. Though the meaning behind Luna was clear, it was wrong to neglect her now. She was just a kitten, it was wrong to consider her as a burden.

You didn't have to look to sense his presence. "What do you think about it?"

"The barn? Er," he rubbed his nape while pacing around the basement, "I don't know. But, I had a feeling I had no other choice but to say yes to Smith. As if we would've been killed if we didn't agree on settling down together."

You stopped petting Luna. "You're right. They would've killed us if it weren't for Mikasa and I, Levi said it himself." He paused and you felt pressure on your shoulders, you looked up to see him glaring at you. "What?"

"And you didn't wanna mention that?"

You uncrossed your legs, letting them hang off the sofa. "I did mention it upstairs, I was just unsure about it up until now." Luna got up from your lap and made her way out the basement, onto the first floor of the house. You sighed, "I decided I'll talk to Levi myself tomorrow morning."

"I'll come with you," he said, coming closer to the mattress.

You shook your head, "I'll do it myself. I don't want anyone else to get involved. We don't know if they're planning on killing us, I'd rather there not be a massacre."

Just by looking at him, you could see the look of disapproval written all over his face. Valerie had gotten to him, it was clear he had doubts of his own. "I said I'll come with you-"

"Do you trust me, Jean?"

He took a deep breath in and out before crouching in front of you. He held both of your hands, "I trust you. I'm just worried, we know nothing about them."

"I know what I'm doing. I don't want anyone to get hurt if things go south."

Jean caressed you, creating circles on the skin of your hand using his thumb. His expression had softened once again. "And what about you?"

"Does it matter?" You spoke in a hushed tone while discreetly shrugging. You wanted to say it didn't matter if anything happened to you, it isn't like you genuinely cared about your life anymore. His eyes were what made you take it back—eyes full of care and distress. His gaze made it clear he would fall apart and become afflicted if anything happened to you. "I mean, I'm the only one that can talk to Levi. I'll go into this blindly if it means the rest of you remain untouched."

He laid his head on your lap, instantly you found your hands in his hair, untangling any knot, massaging his head. You couldn't tell what he was feeling—relief, anxiety, both. "Thank you. Just be careful, okay?"

His words confirmed he felt every emotion. As intimidating as he is and regardless of what he's done, this is who he truly was. Jean was an innocent boy at heart, only wanting the best for his people—his family. He cared ever-so-deeply about everyone but couldn't afford to look vulnerable in front of everyone as he was forced to be a strong-headed leader.

Jean reminded you of yourself in this aspect. Just like him, you were glad you could see this side of his.

"Don't worry about me," you assured while resting with him on the small mattress again.

Moments like these reminded you how small you were compared to the world and you loved every second of it. These moments were the ones you kept close to heart, being on a crowded bus with the people you adore, sharing rooms, laying with Jean, you loved it entirely.

You woke up, taken aback by a shitty dream you just had. It was inevitable when it came to bad dreams during an apocalypse, you were never safe and your dreams would constantly be a great reminder of the fact.

It was just like always, another walker consuming your raw flesh, all while you were still alive. You were used to these kinds of dreams, maybe that's why you didn't flinch at all, it was just your eyes that shot open.

When you first started getting these dreams, it was slightly different. There were points where your body would physically jolt up, ruining your sleep for the rest of the night. Although you hated waking up like that, you despised the fact you were getting used to living this way a little more.

However, after eight months, you realized these dreams would only warn you about the near future. Ever since you started getting these dreams, you later noticed that something unconventional would happen. It could've been the stress or it could've been your intuition, either way, you refused to ignore it now.

It irritated you, especially with the mindfuck of information that was brought to you last night. You didn't want to keep your guard up with Levi's group, but you had no choice now.

You found yourself resting on Jean, in his arms yet again. You needed to get up but you were worried he'd wake up after your weight was lifted off of him. After rubbing your tired eyes, you slowly got up, hoping you wouldn't wake Jean up. If you were going to talk to Levi, you'd prefer nobody knew for your convenience.

You successfully got up from the mattress and noticed how peaceful Jean looked in his sleep. His left hand was in between his nape and the pillow he rested his head on while the other resting on his stomach. His hair was a mess but you loved the way it looked. He was breathing softly from his nose rather than his mouth. Everything about his sleeping figure looked so perfect, it seemed fake.

Upon a closer look, you noticed there was something in Jean's hands. It looked familiar and you had to think about it for a second before realizing it was a polaroid picture. You narrowed your eyes to see what he was holding and to your surprise, it was you. You ruffled your hair as you carefully grabbed the picture from his hands before shying up the stairs. Idiot.

You strolled through the field of nothingness in the dawn. The sky was dark blue and pink, the clouds were slowly fading away and birds were chirping nonstop. You assumed it might have been at least 5 am and thought it would be pointless if no one from the farmhouse was awake, considering one farmhouse to the other was a twenty-minute walk.

"You're up early." You heard a voice from the porch of the larger farmhouse.

You smiled after seeing the familiar faces. "Why are you two up?"

Hange retorted, "I can ask you the same thing, darling. We can't sleep anymore, what's your struggle?"

Levi scowled and nudged their arm, irritated at the fact Hange told you they're unable to sleep nowadays. "You're too loud," he whispered.

"Bad dream. I'm not an insomniac yet," you shrugged. "So you two just stay up all night?"

"Not always. Sleep doesn't come easy anymore, that's all," Hange explained. As you got closer, you can visibly see the intense eye bags under their dead eyes. You understood insomnia was horrible as you dealt with it yourself, but you could tell they don't sleep at all. "Here, come sit with us."

You sat down beside Hange, it looked like Levi was already in a shitty mood this morning, probably due to the lack of sleep he got. Just as you sat down though, you remembered Levi's always like this, it didn't matter.

"So why are you here, brat?" He questioned, realizing you had an ulterior motive for your visit.

You sighed. There was no beating him, he knew everything. "Hm, how do I say this. Wait, first promise you won't kill me."

"Huh? Why-"

Levi cut Hange off, "I can't promise anything kid."

"You scare the shit out of me, Levi. Just a pinky promise, please?" You pleaded in a joking manner.

Hange was in the middle of an unpleasant situation. They kept looking side-to-side whenever you or Levi said something. She grabbed on to Levi's hand and forcefully brought his pinky out, "Hey, four-eyes!-"

"Shut up, just promise her you won't kill her."

He exhaled in annoyance when he felt your pinky attach to his. "I can't kill her now but you should sleep with one eye open."

"You're funny!" Hange laughed hysterically, "I can't sleep in the first place! Have fun trying to kill me short stuff."

You smiled at their banter. Knowing Levi, he would probably never admit aloud that Hange's his friend, regardless, it was evident in your eyes. Their dynamic made it hard to believe otherwise—he was quiet, they spoke for him. You could easily tell Hange knew how to get him out of his comfort zone and secretly, he probably appreciated it but never mentioned it.

"Enough of that. So Y/N, did you wanna talk about something?"

You took a deep breath in, "Yeah, I did." You didn't know how to proceed. You knew no one was supposed to go near the barn in the first place and considering how Levi first treated you, you were starting to feel unsure about the confrontation. One thing's for sure, you did not want to get grabbed by the collar by him again. "I... I know about the barn."

Levi and Hange's once playful eyes had returned to the same dark gaze again. You saw the exact moment it happened and disliked the fact you were the one to cause the light in their eyes to disappear once again.

Hange cleared their throat. Their entire demeanour changed, including the tone of their voice—it was almost intimidating. "Does anyone else know?"

"Just me," you lied. It was your first mistake.

They both let go of a breath. Was it relief? You had no clue. Suddenly, Hange got up and gestured for you to do the same. "Let's take a walk. I'll answer any questions you have."

The three of you walked through the tall grass, in a distance, you saw the forbidden barn full of walkers. You weren't sure why they were taking you to the barn when they could've talked about it elsewhere, it made you feel uneasy.

Hange climbed up the ladder located at the side of the barn, Levi gestured for you to do the same as he followed. There was a door leading inside the barn, where all the walkers would be located. You felt your heartbeat aloud.

Upon entering, there was a space above the bottom, where somebody could stand and look from above. Hange sat at the edge of this leverage, patting the wood beside her, indicating you should sit beside her. Before you complied, you looked at Levi who just stood near the door.

You looked below and watched as the zombies started circling underneath your and Hange's dangling legs. It was dangerous, to say the least, the walkers were literally reaching their arms up, attempting to grab your feet. They'd eat you alive at any given moment, even if you're still breathing, screaming and pleading for your life. They were desperate for you to drop.

"You're not gonna push me, are you?" You didn't mean to sound offensive, it was just your nervousness speaking for you.

Death itself didn't scare you, it was the idea of suffering and defeat that dread upon you.

Hange lightly held onto your shoulder, "Oh come on Y/N, I like you. If I wanted to kill you, I'd do it with my own hands." You heard Levi cough a chuckle from behind, this didn't seem right. It felt ominous with hints of malicious intent.

"I'm sure you're wondering why we have a barn full of stupid zombies, right?" You nodded and Hange continued. "To make things clear, we weren't going to use them to kill any of you. That's sickening."

You let go of a breath you didn't know you were holding on to. Thank God. Your prime suspicion of the barn was out of the way. You knew they would never do something so purely evil, they were too wise to do so. However, your question spiralled back once again. If they were so wise, they wouldn't keep a barn full of blood-thirsty walkers near the place where multiple people resided. So, why?

It was almost as if Hange read your mind.

"They're people. Our people."

You were taken aback by Hange's statement. There was no way they thought this way, at least someone from this group should've been smart enough to know this was wrong. At least someone should've stopped this from happening, it was dangerous and again, twisted. You looked back at Levi and he said nothing, he looked guilty—he was guilty of thinking the same thing.

"With all due respect Hange, they were your people. I'm sure they were held dear to your heart, but they're no longer human. They're mindless zombies." You looked down at the walkers that were still trying to drag you down and felt pity.

A few seconds after, you told both Hange and Levi to watch what you were about to do. You took your knife out from your holster and slashed a cut through your palm. You watched as the droplets of blood fell onto walkers, who tried licking it off their rotting skin immediately. "If I were to fall down there, they wouldn't feel a single ounce of emotion while ripping me apart," you said, soft-spoken, keeping in mind that they were clearly mourning. "You two are aware of this, right?"

There was a moment of silence before you saw a soft yet sad smile approach Hange's face again. "Do you see that man over there?" They pointed at a frail and lean walker. "That's Nile. He used to work with Erwin at school and lived down the road." Hange pointed at what seemed to be two little girls next, "Those two angels are his daughters."

You heard footsteps from behind you. Levi hovered in between you and Hange and pointed at a former human with his eyes, "His wife, Marie. She's the first person Erwin ever loved."

You felt bad. You could tell every time Levi saw Marie, his heart would ache, it just sounded like it. You also didn't understand why Erwin would keep a past lover in the barn when he's supposed to be happily married to someone else. It would've been a different story if Erwin moved on from this woman but Levi's tone was enough to tell you he didn't move on. It would've been helpful if Hange and Levi disclosed more information about everyone before you made assumptions, but you couldn't help but dislike Erwin more.

"The tall man with blond hair is Miche and Nanaba's old man. He's right below you." You watched as the siblings' decaying father tried to reach for your feet. You understood they considered these people as family but it was still wrong. "That's Isabel and Farlan. They were Levi's partners when they were underground-"

"Hange!"

"Oh shit," they chuckled, "Sorry shorty, it wasn't on purpose."

Levi and the underground? "So you're not going to elaborate?"

"Don't think about it too much," Levi mumbled while crouching and placing a hand on your head. "It's something I'm not proud of."

You turned your head away from him and looked down at your palm, the blood was still dripping down on the walkers below. You cut deeper than expected. You found it irritating how Levi knew so much about you yet you were surprised by minor things he accidentally mentioned.

"You should let them rest in peace," you said softly. "They've been reincarnated as something they'd probably despise. Free them from their misery."

There was silence again. You had a feeling they knew this was wrong but they just couldn't let go. You stood up and Hange spoke up again. "We've been researching to find a possible way to turn them back."

"Hange, I don't think there is a way to bring them back."

They grabbed you by your collar and before you knew it, you were being held over the swarm of walkers. "There could be! You can't give up without trying!"

You heard Levi telling Hange to pull you back from the ledge but they didn't seem to hear him. They were full of so many emotions and it seemed to have bottled up to this point.

You glanced at the walkers again, wondering if your curiosity was going to be the death of you. Part of you was glad you didn't let anyone from the group take this matter into their own hands, but you didn't want to die like this either—it was a sorry and lame way to go.

"Hange if you drop me I swear I'll come for you when I turn," you shouted, hoping it would snap them out of it.

It worked, they pulled you away. They sighed and you heard Levi let go of his breath as well. "Sorry," Hange muttered.

"Holy shit, you're scarier than Levi," you exhaled, earning a relieved chuckle from both of them. You paced around the leverage, discovering you have more questions than you anticipated. "What did you mean by research? Can you maybe demonstrate something?" You asked.

Hange smirked and their attitude changed once again. "I thought you'd never ask."

They descended down the stairs outside, you waited with Levi until they came back. "So, underground huh?"

Levi lightly smacked the back of your head, "Mind your business kid. I was born and raised there."

Hange came back faster than you thought, you weren't even able to converse with Levi about his history.

In Hange's hands, you found a black box and there was something in there. It was alive. They came to the ledge with the box and opened it slightly. "Y/N, come here." You did as they said and stood beside them. There was an odour coming from the box but you didn't want to question it, you assumed it would be in your best interest to not.

Suddenly, Hange picked out a rat by its tail. Oh, God. They apologized to it as it squirmed in their hand, trying to find an escape. You closed your eyes slightly, hoping you were wrong.

You weren't. After apologizing to the rat, they threw it into the far corner of the barn. The walkers stopped reaching their arms up and slowly started limping towards the rat. The poor thing. This isn't what you wanted to see, nor were you expecting it in the slightest.

"Watch," Hange wiped their hands on their pants and yelled, "Isabel!"

You saw a smaller walker with two pigtails look up at Hange while chewing on the rat's raw flesh. The rat squealed and the sight made you want to throw up.

"See! She looked up," Hange exclaimed. "Isabel knew I was calling for her and looked up. That has to mean something, don't you think!"

You didn't want to disappoint them but it meant nothing. The walker just reacted to Hange's voice, it didn't matter what name they called. You sighed, realizing this is going to be tougher than you thought. The people from the farm were convinced there was a way to bring these walkers back to their human selves. Trying to convey them would be like talking to a brick wall, it was evident after Hange sacrificed a living rat to prove absolutely nothing.

As much as you hoped, you couldn't do this on your own. You needed help from others to help snap the farm out of this delusion they had. This apocalypse had changed everyone. Everyone lost the idea of normalcy after eight months, some were severely traumatized while some had just turned cold, but the people on the farm were simply crazy.

The walk back was quiet, well, you were the quiet one. Hange kept rambling about potential cures thinking you were listening and Levi kept reminding Hange to lower their voice.

"I had another question," you muttered, unintentionally interrupting Hange.

"Go on love, what is it?" They asked in an anticipating manner. They probably thought you were going to ask about the cure or an experiment.

You didn't know if you were supposed to ask this, it might even come off as offensive. "Why would you want to ally with us?" You asked quietly. "I mean, you guys have everything. Weapons, food, shelter, people. We had nothing to offer you, so why?"

"You don't need to know everything." Levi's gaze sent chills down your spine. You thought this would've been something you'd get a clear answer to, especially considering it involved you, but you were wrong again.

Hange threw her arm over your shoulders. "He's in a pissy mood for no reason. The more people the better! Right Levi?" You heard Levi tsk before looking away, Hange took this as an opportunity to whisper something to you.

"I'll tell you later."

Secrets. There were so many secrets the group on the farm would not disclose. Everything was left unanswered and it irked you. You wanted to know every little detail about the farm now that you were allied with them, but it seemed impossible. Whenever you learned something, another problem would arise. Every time you took a step forward, you'd fall three steps back.

You were in the middle of the main farmhouse and the smaller one your group was in. "I think I'll head back before anyone notices I'm gone."

Levi scrunched his brows and narrowed his eyes at the sudden comment while Hange had the same expression on their face. "Are you sure you don't want some tea?"

You shook your head, "Thank you, but I should head back. I'm a little tired, I'll just sleep for another hour or so."

"Okay, darling! Sleep well," Hange greeted. She put her arm around your shoulder again, "If you tell anyone, I'll kill you."

They said it with a smile but you didn't doubt them one bit after what happened in the barn full of walkers. All you knew was that you didn't wanna get held over top mindless zombies again. For a moment, you were glad you didn't mention how your group already doubted you, you would've got caught in your lie.

On your way back, you had to take a moment, you wanted to scream because of what you just witnessed. You crouched in the middle of the tall grass and covered your eyes with your hands. You wished you could talk to them without fear. You needed them to understand that the walkers in their barn were not human anymore, neither was there a way to turn them back to human or anything remotely close. They were mindless, blood-thirsty zombies, nothing more or less.

Another thing that didn't sit right with you was the fact they were ready to kill you while keeping walkers they refused to hurt. They lost their minds. It made you wonder if they even killed any walkers yet. If they had, did the loss of their friends change their ways? You had so many questions but not enough answers.

Trying to look for the good in this situation was hard. At least they weren't going to brutally kill you with the walkers? What the fuck. You had a feeling they were using the walkers for research and you were right, you just didn't assume they still thought of the dead as people.

You needed some help and guidance but you were scared someone would lash out and get themselves killed. You got back up and continued walking towards the farmhouse.

You took a deep breath in before quietly opening the farmhouse's door. As you turned around, you saw Valerie standing down the hall with a majority of the group. She stood there with Eren, Armin, Tyler, Marco, Connie and Jean.

Bitch, she knew Sasha, Mikasa and Avni would defend you while Dan simply wouldn't have an opinion. She didn't trust you and she wanted to turn everyone against you. "So where-"

"Are you okay?" Jean asked while walking towards you. "Marco! Grab some wet towels." You saw Marco rush to a closet to grab towels. You were confused, you could've sworn they were going to interrogate your ass for not being home but, they seemed concerned?

"Your face is all bloody, Y/N." You looked at your hands. Shit. You forgot there was still fresh blood making its way out the deep cut on your palm. It was all over your face now. "What happened? Where were you?"

There was no point in lying now. "First of all, I'm okay, don't worry. I was with Hange and Levi."

You saw how everyone's face expressed pure suspicion but, you expected it. They already doubted you and you were aware. After all, if Jean couldn't trust you, you didn't think anyone else would either. It isn't like you were doing anything wrong either, you got some answers to share even though you weren't supposed to.

"Oh, don't look at me like that-"

"Did they tell you anything?" Jean cut you off. Right, he knew you were going to ask them about the barn. You told him last night.

You nodded and sat down near the stairs. "Well, they're not gonna use those walkers to kill us," you shrugged. "And I was right, they're trying to find potential cures for them."

You didn't want to tell them this next part but again, you owed them loyalty. Besides, you also needed their help because you knew you couldn't convince them on your own. "I'm not supposed to say this, I told them I'm the only one that knows about the barn."

Marco handed Jean the wet towel and he tilted your head up, softly patting the towel on and under your eye. "Let me take care of this. Go on, keep talking."

"I don't know how to say this, fuck. They think the walkers are people."

Jean paused. "Huh? They what?"

"They think the walkers are people," you repeated while taking the towel from him. "They refuse to kill them because they were their people at one point and keep conducting experiments on them in hopes they'll turn back."

Connie rubbed his eyes harshly before walking away. "That's bullshit. It's too early for this. I'm going back to sleep," he yawned while walking past you and up the stairs. It's not like he didn't believe you, he was just too tired to process anything. You couldn't blame him, it was only 7 o'clock and he still had an hour to spare before getting up for the actual day.

After Connie left, you continued. "I tried telling them they're dead," you stated while looking down at your palm as proof. "They didn't listen. Well, they looked like they knew it was wrong but wouldn't say anything back."

"Well isn't that fun," Marco mumbled. He noticed a few people looking at him, "Sarcasm."

Eren ran his hands through his hair. "We're allies with idiots that think walkers are still people."

"I think they're just in denial," Armin tried defending. "I don't know, it's hard seeing your family turn into actual monsters, maybe they just need time-"

"It's been eight months, how much more time do they need to get over it?" Eren raised his voice while massaging his head. "I don't wanna be around people that are stupid by will. I'd rather leave."

"Let's not jump there yet." The short blond stated, trying to deescalate the new issue his short-tempered best friend brought up. "They're providing us shelter and their own supplies."

"We can find shelter elsewhere, plus we never had a problem with finding supplies."

Marco picked Luna up from the ground, she was kinda like a support animal for him now. "We can talk to them about this, we didn't even get to try yet."

"She said she tried but it was useless!"

The group started arguing back and forth. You were cleaning your wound thoroughly when Jean leaned towards you. "Let's just run away," he said in a joking manner while rolling his eyes, causing you to smile a bit as well. It didn't sound like a bad idea. "Eren, you're overreacting," Jean cut him off.

Eren turned his head to Jean, "Overreacting? Oh, shut up. These people are idiots. Idiots get killed."

"Do you have trouble comprehending shit?" He retorted, "They know what they're doing is wrong. They just need to fucking snap out of it and Y/N can make that happen. Right?"

You felt the pressure on you but nodded anyway. You didn't want to leave this area, nor did you want to leave this group behind. You knew that if you did leave the farm but managed to face each other in the future, there would probably be a fight you weren't looking forward to.

"I'll talk to them," you exhaled. "I just need you guys to keep quiet about this, they think you don't know about the barn situation." You received nods and made your way downstairs, if you had another forty-five minutes to spare, so be it, you were going to use those minutes to rest your eye.

Jean shrugged, "You heard the lady. Eren, keep your mouth shut." He provocatively pinched Eren's cheek while walking past him.

"Shut the fuck up."

He followed you downstairs and watched as you immediately crashed onto the mattress. You sighed, "I don't think I can do this on my own."

"What makes you say that?" He questioned. "I think you're capable of doing it."

You took your head out of the pillow below you and looked at him, "I tried. I just got threatened and held over walkers like bait."

He held your hand and traced over the cut. "Are you okay?"

"Mhm." Suddenly, you were caught off guard with pain emerging from your palm. "Ow- Don't touch it!" You said, hitting the side of Jean's head lightly.

"Sorry sorry sorry sorry," He kept your hand in his but stopped tracing your palm immediately. He looked sorry until he started laughing quietly. The way you flinched and hit him scared him for a second, he found it amusing after the fact.

"Wow, you're an ass," you scoffed in a joking manner. "But as I was saying, I'm just going to need help."

You lie down beside him on the mattress again and although you said you wanted to sleep, you couldn't. You spent your spare time talking to Jean about stupid things like previous experiences pre-pandemic.

"Oh right. Jean, look what I have." You dug your hand into your pocket and pulled out the polaroid picture you stole from him earlier.

Jean opened his eye and soon tried snatching it back from you. After struggling to get the photo back from you, he ended up hovering over while you remained under him. His hands were pinning your upper arms down while you continued to tease him about the picture.

"Y/N, love, give it back."

You shook your head while snickering. "Nope," you popped the 'p'. "I look disgusting, you're not getting it back."

"Disgusting? Are you fucking delusional?" He scoffed before showering you with playful kisses. "You. Are. So. Beautiful," he said in between pecks. "Now give it back."

"No," you smiled, "Not unless you tell me something."

He reciprocated the same smile you gave him. He nodded once, "Okay baby. What do you wanna know?"

"First kiss me." He shrugged his shoulders, why not. He could do this all day if he had the chance. Jean attached his lips to yours and instantly found your tongue. You tasted like mint, he couldn't get enough of it. You pulled away and he was already sulking, you laughed softly at his antics before asking, "Why were you and Eren in prison?"

"Er. What if I just kiss you again, would that suffice?"

You kissed your teeth and shook your head. "No. Why did you go to prison, Jean?

He tilted his head back and chuckled nervously. "Fine, you win." Jean's grip on your arms loosened, in fact, he let go completely and rested his head on your chest. Finally, you were about to learn why he went to prison. "Keep the picture."

Nevermind.

"Wow," you gasped, "Was it that bad?"

"You make a great pillow, what the fuck-"

"You're avoiding the question, Kirstein," you whined.

He looked up at you, chin on your chest and shook his head. "I'd do it again."

"Interesting," you muttered before looking at the picture in your hands. Well, there was no use for this anymore. "I'm gonna burn it."

"Don't-" he realized he was a little too loud and stopped himself. "Come on."

"I don't need it anymore-"

"Okay? Pass it over then," he demanded to which you chuckled in response. "Don't be like that," he sulked once again.

"I'll think about it."

Jean remained on you and you began to run your fingers through his hair again. It was soft. He had his eyes shut when he called for you again. "Wanna know what happened this morning?"

"Hm? What happened," you responded as quietly as he spoke.

"I woke up to Valerie beside me."

You stopped caressing his head. You were taken aback by it, now what the fuck. "I thought it was you."

He started explaining the situation. "I heard my name and because you were supposed to be beside me, naturally, I was like 'good morning doll.' Didn't wanna get out of bed either so we just stayed like that for a while until she said her name." You imagined Jean shooting his eyes open after realizing you weren't beside him.

First thing's first, it's creepy and stalkerish to lay down beside someone who's sleeping. Second, she's tried seducing Jean once already, now it was just harassment. It's like she couldn't take no for an answer.

"I'm going to kill her."

"I'm sorry."

You shook your head, "What are you apologizing for? It was all her." You felt him hesitantly nod without looking at you. You glanced at him as his eyes were still closed, "Unless there's something else you have to tell me?"

"No. I just wanna sleep," he mumbled. "Feels like I barely slept last night."

"You have ten minutes," you stroked his hair again, feeling him fall into ease.

Jean was glad you didn't ask him anything else. He didn't have it in him to tell you what really happened with Valerie. He wanted to, that's why he brought it up but, he just couldn't.

Now, the barn and Valerie were stressing you out. You continued to detangle Jean's hair as you thought about both. Throwing Valerie in the barn full of walkers didn't sound like a bad idea, honestly, you thought she deserved it for how annoying she's been these past few days. You knew Valerie liked Jean but you didn't think she'd go to such extents.

You squinted your eyes to check the time on the clock located across you. It was the wrong time but, you could see it had been ten minutes already. You took another look at Jean, who was napping peacefully on your chest. He needed the rest, you two had both gone through a lot in a matter of hours.

The sound of people walking upstairs was becoming louder, everyone was starting to get ready for the day. It was officially 8 am, the morning of a new day. Everyone had to get to the barn at 9 am, as Erwin instructed while everyone left the basement yesterday.

You shook Jean. "Hey, it's time to wake up," you spoke softly.

"Five more minutes," he groaned, still tired as ever.

You sighed, "I already gave you five minutes. Come on, get up. I'm going numb, you're not light." Jean finally complied and sat up on the other side of the mattress. He looked confused as he rubbed his eyes and a tear caused by his nap. You smiled at his oblivion after awakening. "I can finally breathe again."

He laughed, "I'm not that heavy."

"You're 6'3 and 95% muscle. Trust me, you are." You threw a pillow at him before getting up, though his reflexes came in handy. He threw the pillow right back at you and used that to his advantage, he pulled you back onto him. "Oh, you think you're smooth, huh?"

He had a handful of your hair tangled in his hand as he pulled you in for another kiss on the lips. His left hand was placed around your waist, occasionally caressing your skin and hugging you closer as seconds went by. Jean tasted sweet, just as sweet as these moments with him. You couldn't get enough of him, just like how he couldn't. You yearned for more but remembered the other group and let go.

"I think I am." He was about to pull you in again but he only received a pillow to the face, the same pillow he blocked before. "

"Time. We have to go to the farmhouse too," you reminded.

He frowned, "How about we ditch them?"

"You know we can't," you grinned as you helped him get up. "Plus, I have to remind the others to not mention that barn around them. And I wanna shower, get moving."

You dragged Jean to the bathroom downstairs. You haven't been in this one yet either. It was just as rustic as the basement was—stone shower and countertop while the rest was wooden. The mirror was frameless and rectangular with a curve at the top, its back had a daylight white LED light radiating the light in the room.

You took a moment to wash the cut on your palm thoroughly. It wasn't treated properly and you were afraid you'd get an infection, or even worse, you didn't want to come in contact with a walker with an open wound like that. You didn't know much about them at all, but you didn't wanna take any risks by accidentally getting the dead's blood in your system.

Jean had already taken his shirt off and turned the shower faucet on. "You can hop in first, I'll be outside-"

He grabbed your hand before you were able to leave the bathroom. "Join me," he said, pointing and gesturing at the shower using his head. "Save time and water."

"You don't care about saving water," you snickered while pulling your t-shirt over your head. "I don't think you care about saving time either."

smut 🕺🏻

Jean laughed. "I don't." He pulled you into the shower and kissed your lips, groping your ass with his rough hand immediately.

You figured what his intentions were as they were aggressive and quite clear. You pulled out of the kiss and chuckled, "We're running low on time Jean. Wash up first."

He exhaled but listens anyway. Though that being said, he finishes washing himself quickly so he could focus on you. You rinsed the shampoo off. As your hands were still massaging your scalp to get rid of excess soap, you felt Jean drawing small and gentle circles against your skin.

"You seem to be in a good mood," you teased as you met his hands on your waist.

Jean pulled you in closer, starting to place pecks on your neck. "Mhm. Because you are too," he mumbled against you.

His voice was husky and deep, his hands started travelling up your body, now massaging your breasts, already putting you at ease as he continued to kiss your skin. You felt your nipples erect, as well as his cock.

You turn around to face him and place your arms on his shoulders lightly. "Got a condom?" He smirked in response, you took it as a yes. "So what are you waiting for? We're-"

"Short on time, I know." He cooled down the temperature of the water, knowing it was about to get hot. The back of your head hit his chest as one hand gripped and squeezed your breast. His dominant hand was crawling between your thighs and against your vulva. Immediately you let out a gasp. "Gotta get you ready first."

Jean's hands continued to grope your breast, just so he can put you at ease. He knew you were as you kept humming contently. His fingertips lightly yet rapidly tapped on your clit as he sucked on your neck.

He slowly slipped a finger into your pussy, earning a whimper from you. He pumped his finger slowly as he kept kissing your neck, you were yearning for more. Sooner or later, Jean added his ring finger too. He curled his fingers and easily found your g-spot. Your moans were what guided him, once he realized he was brushing your g-spot with the tips of his fingers, he started picking up the pace.

Jean kneaded your nipple with his thumb as he rammed his two fingers into you rapidly, turning you on more than ever. His palm continued to apply pressure to your clit, causing your legs to shake profusely. "Already?" He smirked into your skin.

"Shut up," you shied before you shut your eyes and pressed your teeth together, inhaling barely any air. You didn't think Jean could go any faster but you were proven wrong. Something about you trying to get him to stop teasing you riled up something inside of him. "Fuck! I'm-"

Before you could say anything, you had already rode out your first orgasm. It only made Jean cocky, he was the only one able to say he made you cum within five minutes. Not only that, he was somehow hornier than before and he needed to do something about the throbbing pulse that was aching his cock. Your whines and desperate need of him inside of you drove him crazy.

He reached out of the shower to grab the condom on the counter and safely put on the condom, making sure there was not a single drop of water in there to mess things up.

You were still trying to get yourself together when Jean came back behind you. He grabbed your chin and turned your head a bit so he could kiss your lips. His lips were soft and wet, his kisses were eager, sloppy and messy.

"Spread your legs. You did as he said. Jean paused for a moment and slid his dick in between your thighs, waiting for your okay to proceed.

It's almost as if he read you. As soon as you nodded, you were going to make a snarky comment about how he's taking forever when he slipped the tip of his cock into your slit. You gasped loudly. "Shh, don't want anyone to know you're getting fucked up," he whispered into your ear. As soon as you were throbbing at his words. Of course, he didn't let that go unnoticed. "Oh? You want everyone to know, don't you, doll?" He chuckled.

Once again, before you can say anything at all, he grabbed your waist and started rolling his hips back and forth, instantly grazing your cervix over and over again. Your mind was already fogging up and you started to look for anything to grab—a wall, a rail, door handle, literally anything at all. You found yourself grabbing his right wrist as he continued to use your waist as leverage to go deeper. "Jean-"

"Can't take it?" He cut you off and laughed sheepishly. "Baby, I'm not even all the way in yet."

He grabbed onto your waist firmly once again and started gradually pushing more of himself into your pussy. "I can't," you cried and admitted despite not wanting to.

"Aw, too big?" Jean cooed into your ear. "You can, pretty girl," he encouraged shortly after. He rolled his hips back again just to thrust into you balls deep again and grunt, "Fuck, just like that."

It was as if he knew your body more than you. He knew how much you can take and your limits, never pushing anything onto you.

Jean continued to buck his hips at a steady rhythm, making sure he isn't hurting you in any way, shape or form. That doesn't mean he wasn't fighting the urge to destroy you completely though—he wanted to, desperately.

However, as usual, you never took long to adjust to something. Whether it came to shooting guns for the first time or having sex. You let out a hitched moan as Jean's cock kept hitting your cervix, "Go rough. I'm ready."

Finally, he thought. Without having to repeat it twice, he started thrusting into you, faster and harder. You let out staggered and broken moans, keeping a tight grip on his wrist. Jean was having the time of his fucking life but he needed more—he wanted to fuck you into oblivion and ruin you.

He somehow loosened your grip on his wrist and as he fucked you from behind, roughly as you asked, his hand found its way to your clit once again. He pressed his finger on your clit and tapped it first to see what reaction he'd earn from you.

You on the other hand, arched your back further and your whimpers were louder. Now that he knew another one of your weaknesses, he wasn't going to let that go into vain. His large hands grabbed your pussy and the two fingers Jean used to finger you before were now massaging your clit.

He continuously rubbed your clit in circular motions and side-to-side ruthlessly. "Shit, shit, shit, shit!" You repeated. Jean didn't care about how loud you were right now, in fact, he loved it so much, it pushed him to go faster and harder. The possibility of the two of you being heard was at the back of both your minds, yet it didn't make either of you wanna stop.

Jean flicked your clit with his fingers as he continued to ram into you freely. His hand was still controlling your clit the way he wanted and you were only getting louder. The pressure in your core finally released, causing you to squirt harder than ever. Neither of you could differentiate between the water and your juices.

Though this was your second orgasm, Jean still wasn't done. Yeah, he really didn't care about the time. He was obviously getting close as his movements got sloppier. He did slow down and show you some mercy however, his fingers continued to play with your sensitive and swollen clit. You were still moaning in pleasure but, you were too fucked out to do this again.

He pumped his cock in and out of you and you finally felt him twitch inside of you. "Oh fuuckk," he groaned raspily against your skin before he pulled out and discarded the condom.

"God, I can't get enough of this. I can't get enough of you." He finally faced you again and his hands immediately latched onto your waist again. He was still panting as he pulled you in and basically crashed into your arms. Jean's hair was wet and out of place. You'd often see his hair all shaggy and out of place, but you didn't realize how beautiful he was when his hair was drenched, and when he was out of breath.

You got out of the shower and looked at the time, you still had another thirty minutes to get changed and walk to the farmhouse. You slipped your towel off and were about to put your clothes on until Jean grabbed you again. "What's the hurry?"

"Time," you mumbled against his skin, already wanting to go back to sleep.

He kissed the side of your head and took out a bottle of lotion from the cabinets below the sink. He started lotioning your shoulders, making sure you were relaxed after the sex with him and ensuring you were set for the day.

His touch never failed to put you at ease. You felt the tension and stress lift from your shoulders as Jean caressed your skin with the scented lotion. After he was done, the both of you changed into some new clothes. You wore black jeans and a white button-up, however, it was revealing a slight bit of your skin. No one would mind. Jean on the other hand wore one of Marco's black full-sleeved t-shirts with some jeans as well.

Jean and you met up with the group not so long after. He had to remind you to talk to the group about the barn situation and keep quiet.

One by one, everyone started to leave the house and made their way to the main farmhouse. Avni caught up to you and walked beside you. "You're fucking glowing compared to last night."

What happened last night again? You took a second to think about it, you remembered how you learned you were an Ackerman last night and were quite literally a mess. It felt like it happened so long ago, especially because of the amount of shit that happened within hours. Though it was obviously because of the inconvenient events, you still blamed Jean for your oblivion and ditziness.

"You can thank me for it." You looked to see who just put their arm around you and of course, it was Jean. He held his head up high as if he was bragging about it to Avni but she just scolded him instead. His way of thinking was far different than yours. This motherfucker is cocky. You would totally hit him if you weren't so slow right now.

Luckily for you, Marco did it for you. He slapped the side of Jean's head and sighed disappointedly, "Jean, it's too early for this, please." Sometimes you'd wonder if Marco was paid to stick by his side. He had so much patience for someone who's surrounded by completely intolerable idiots all the time.

While the four of you walked as a group, you suddenly remembered the tattoo story Jean told you once. "Wait Marco, can I see that stick and poke?" Avni snickered beside you, it seems she already knew about it too.

Marco stopped in his tracks and the three of you did the same. He shook his head while unzipping his black zip-up and lifting his blue t-shirt up a bit. On his lower abdomen revealed a poorly drawn, tiny dick. "This is so embarrassing."

"And Jean put that on you?" You questioned, receiving a nod. "Why is there a red 'X' over it?"

Avni scoffed in a joking manner, intentionally trying to be a tease, "Jean's homophobic."

As she expected, his jaw dropped and he immediately tried telling you two the story. "No! You're getting it all wrong. Marco started bitching about it so I drew the 'X' over it-"

"And you thought the dick would go away?" You suppressed your laughter, trying to push him over the edge as well. It was his karma for fucking you stupid this morning.

"I was drunk," he defended again, "I'm not homophobic, I love the gays and Marco."

Marco laughed with Avni and you. "They're only joking Jean, we know," his best friend assured.

The walk to the farmhouse was faster around the people you hold close to your heart, time seriously went by faster around them. You were all welcomed by Erwin who opened the door for you guys. He briefly explained that you'll just be working around the barn and farmhouse—so just chores. Moblit was making breakfast alongside Nanaba, both trying to shoo Hange away to avoid burning the kitchen down.

"I'm not that shitty, I can make stew!" She exclaimed in defence.

Moblit tried to calm Hange down while maintaining his distance from them. "And it tastes wonderful, but this is french toast, not soup."

"Hange, last time you tried helping Moblit make french toast, you almost started a fire. You're a hazard in the kitchen," Nanaba chuckled. It was the first time you heard her speak, she was extremely quiet otherwise. She also seemed to be closer to Hange than her other group members.

It had been a while since any of you had a proper breakfast like this. For the longest time, everyone was living off of non-perishable or even expired food on some nights, as long as everyone was fed and no one starved, it didn't matter what it was.

The french toast Moblit and Nanaba made for everyone reminded you of everything pre-pandemic. The smell of the food was so sweet and nostalgic, you missed your old life. You remembered the mornings where you actually got to sit down and eat breakfast instead of being on the run in order to be punctual; you remembered the nights you would have dinner with Avni at restaurants. Oh, how you wished you were grateful for what you had before the world went to shit. The saying is true, you never really realize what you have until it's too late.

You dissociated in the midst of eating and conversing, beginning to think about everything all at once—the barn, a secret Hange still had to tell you, your past life, Valerie and Jean, Eren wanting to leave the farmhouse, being an Ackerman. Your thoughts were louder than anyone else near you.

Your arm got shoved and you automatically knew it was Avni—her touch was familiar and recognizable. "You good?" She asked while taking another bite of her breakfast.

"Yeah, just stressed about everything," you mumbled, looking down at your far-from-empty plate.

"Don't be." You looked at her tempted to laugh, great fucking advice Avni. She wasn't the best with her words and it blatantly showed. "Everything's gonna play out juuust fine. If not, we're always prepared for the worst, aren't we?"

You couldn't deny that. She was right, you two had always expected the worst so there wouldn't be any surprises or disappointments, it helped you two survive this entire time. You nodded, already feeling less tensed. Only Avni held that power. "We are. You're right."

You excused yourself from the table only to be stopped by Miche. "Where are you going? Sit down for a bit."

"Nowhere," you admitted. "I should've asked, shit. Can I grab some milk and oatmeal? It's for Luna."

Miche shrugged while looking for the cat, "You don't need to ask."

He scared you. He always looked so serious all the time and it was intimidating. Not to mention, his height and build just added on to how fucking terrifying he was in your eyes—he was even taller than Jean and Marco, it was unreal.

On your way to the fridge, you met Hange again and they passed the milk over in a small bowl. They noticed how your eyes started begging for answers and it made them chuckle. In that aspect, you reminded Hange of herself. "Not yet. There are still too many people around."

You frowned but understood. There were over twenty people in the area, anyone can overhear. You didn't want to take any chances considering you were the odd one out in both groups, the risk wasn't worth being patronized even further. You took the two bowls from Hange's hands, "Thank you."

Luna clung around your legs, waiting to be fed. You looked at her in awe and placed the bowls on the ground, scratching her head as she drank the milk. Suddenly you felt a gentle hand being placed on your shoulder.

"You really love her, don't you?" It was Petra, smiling softly. "Here, come with me."

You did as she said and walked out the front door with her. She carried a burlap sack over her shoulder and you could recognize the clucks of a chicken in there. After walking a reasonable distance, Petra looked around to see if anyone was around and as soon as she saw the coast was clear, she started talking.

"So you know about the barn right?" Ah, the word spread around. Well, what else would you expect? You nodded and she continued. "I don't like it at all. My sister's in there and I wake up every morning wanting to shoot her in the head to get her out of this hell. She deserves to rest peacefully. You think the same, don't you?"

Hange and Levi must've told everyone about your knowledge of the barn. No one mentioned it at the main farmhouse but Petra disclosed everything. "Rico, Miche and Nanaba hate the idea too."

"What about your husband?"

"Fiancé," she corrected. "Oulo thinks that as long as we're with them, we're safe so we shouldn't interfere with what they're doing," she sighed. "He looks up to Levi, I mean he always has but he should at least have his own opinions. I think he's so stupid for that."

You thought about everything she was spilling out. "You guys are a group though, they should take what you feel into consideration."

"I didn't say anything about it. Miche did but he got into a huge fight with Levi and Erwin because of it," Petra explained, frowning as she thought about the incident. "Nanaba had to beg them to let Miche stay on the land."

"They made him stay in that barn for two whole days."

"What the fuck?!" You spat. You remembered how Hange mentioned the siblings' father was in the barn too, making him stay in that barn with his dead dad in there was fucked up. "You're lying-"

"I wish I was." The two of you made it up to the top of the barn and Petra held the sack over the walkers. Not again. She closed her eyes shut in distress, "I wish I had more authority so I didn't have to do this anymore," she said before letting go of the sack and covering her ears to block out the chickens' cries for help as they got eaten alive.

You walked her out of the barn and sat outside. "You're a doctor, you do have enough authority."

"But Hange's a scientist. They trust her to find a cure more than a stupid doctor."

You exhaled, still hearing the faint sound of walkers growling inside of the barn. "I personally don't think Hange's getting anywhere with their research."

"I didn't think so at first either, but they have theories that actually make sense." Petra started naming the theories one by one.

1. Everyone is infected. It doesn't matter if you got the vaccine or not—once you come in contact with a walker, you are infected. As soon as you are exposed to the infection, you find yourself dreaming about zombies that very night, and if you happened to die, you will turn.

2. The walkers that move insanely quickly and are stronger than others are the ones who are fully vaccinated. Two doses were like a powerup Hange said.

3. A zombie's most vital organ is the brain. When one dies after having two doses, there's a signal sent to their brain (which is still alive after death), these transmissions disrupt the brainwaves causing one to fall into a rage and turn into a homicidal maniac—a zombie. This is why it's important to permanently get rid of the zombie's brain.

4. In addition to the third theory, it's contagious when someone gets bit or scratched by a walker. When someone is bitten or scratched by a walker, they start feeling dizzy and nauseous; they start sweating uncontrollably despite their body temperature changing from burning hot to freezing cold randomly. Once they pass out and are considered "dead," they can turn within eight to twenty-four hours.

5. Zombies don't have issues with coordination because it's a core memory regarding muscle movement. However, they still cannot plan attacks or control what they're doing. The reincarnated have a problem with cognitive control, therefore they can't help their desire to consume flesh.

6. Because coordination is muscle memory, Hange thinks any other core memory can be appealing to a specific walker which can help them turn back.

The theories didn't sound... stupid? They actually make sense?

You sat in the field of tall grass with Petra, in great astonishment. Hange might have been on to something, you just wished they told you their knowledge beforehand—it made a lot more sense now. You felt bad for somewhat invalidating their feelings and thinking she was going nowhere with this research.

Thinking about the second theory reminded you of the two walkers you encountered while escaping the church—the ones that were faster, stronger and more skilled than the other hundreds. The only reason they were faster was that they were fully vaccinated, it made sense. The third theory connected the dots as to why it was crucial to permanently dismantle the zombie's brain.

Muscle memory and how it can be related to specific core memories could be possible, especially the way they put it.

Obtaining this much information within eight months was impressive. Honestly, impressive would still be an understatement. This apocalypse was the last thing on anyone's mind, no one expected it. Everyone was so intrigued about the spreading virus and pandemic, the thought of something so supernatural never occurred.

"Wow. Hange's pretty fucking amazing." It's all you could manage to say.

"They're a genius," Petra smiled briefly. "But it doesn't make it right."

You nodded hopelessly and agreed, "It doesn't make it right."

The two of you walked back to the main farmhouse. Even at a distance, you noticed others heading towards the barn closer to the main premise. They were already starting to do chores around the place.

"Yo Jean!" Connie exclaimed when he saw what was past the doors of the barn. "There's your relatives," he smiled while pointing at stables occupied by horses and other farm animals.

"It's like a family reunion," Eren added on, egging to piss Jean off.

The taller man only sighed as he dropped the bucket of water on the ground. "I hate you two."

Your part of the group got to work instantly, they were told to clean the stables, feed the animals and wash them. Levi and Miche were keeping an eye on them while the others were inside doing housework rather than the dirty work.

Mikasa, Sasha and Valerie started by feeding them while Marco, Armin, Dan and Tyler were cleaning them at the same time.

"I love animals," Valerie said softly.

Sasha's eyes widened, "Seriously? Me too! I wanted to become a vet. I've been surrounded by animals all my life, I lived on a farm growing up."

"You're lying," Valerie exclaimed, "I did too!" Suddenly, she let out a scream. The horses stopped feeding off the hay and decided to tug on her hair. Marco quickly helped her out and she sighed, "They just never liked me."

"I believe her," Connie muttered on the other side of the barn, still standing next to Jean and Eren. "That's why Jean doesn't like her back."

Eren covered up his laugh with a cough while Jean was contemplating killing both of them. Soon, their laughter came to an end when Levi called them out, "Hey, you three! Quit standing around doing nothing." They were startled, to say the least.

You and Petra made it to the barn. You walked in on Connie and Eren making more horse jokes directed to Jean. "Do you understand what they're saying?"

Jean replied to Eren by swatting the heavy, drenched towel across his neck. Eren winced in pain at first but then he grabbed a bucket of water and tossed it towards Jean, only for the water to get all over Connie. Your eyes were wide open and your mouth was slightly parted.

"I feel like I'm babysitting kids," Levi exhaled in annoyance. You didn't even realize he and Miche we were standing right there. "You three, corner. You're on timeout."

You shook your head and chuckled a bit, Levi was treating them like kids now too. You diverted your attention to the other end of the barn, where the others were. They were doing a lot better than Jean, Eren and Connie. Actually, it seemed like it until you heard Sasha and Armin's stupid little conversation.

"God, I'm thirsty," she panted. "Can I drink this?"

Armin knitted his eyebrows, "What? No, it's for- Sasha, no, stop!"

He ended up having to run after her in order to take the bucket of water from Sasha's possession. You heard Miche laugh at the interaction before composing himself again. He knows how to laugh? Good to know. He didn't seem as scary anymore.

You turned to Levi once again, "Do you know where Avni is?"

"The short brat that has a smart mouth?"

You scoffed at the description, almost finding it funny. One, it was accurate; two, he just described himself. "Yeah, sure."

"Farmhouse with the cat. She's scouting with Rico soon."

"Thank you." You were about to head out of the barn before Levi stopped you. He asked for you to bring out Oulo and Nanaba to replace Jean, Eren and Connie for the time being.

You made your way to the farmhouse and told Nanaba and Oulo about the stupid barn situation. They both sighed and cursed under their breath, obviously not wanting to do barn work. You didn't blame them, you didn't want to either—that's why you were going to request to go on this scout with Avni and Rico.

Well, avoiding chores was one of the reasons. You also wanted to go because Rico and Avni didn't necessarily have a nice encounter with each other. You wanted to accompany Avni just in case.

Everyone agreed, calling you the barrier in case something did happen between them. Before the three of you left, you noticed Rico crouching to play with Luna. As soon as she caught you staring at her, she stood up again, wiping the smile off her face.

"Let's go," she said, walking past you and out the door. You and Avni looked at each other, shrugged your shoulders and followed her out.

You and Avni noticed she was heading towards the barn everyone was already in. She walked closer to you and whispered, "Hold on, does this mean-"

"I think so. We're going around the area on horses," you answered in the same tone.

Avni smiled in a kiddish way, "Fuck yeah."

"What are you so excited for," you questioned. "Didn't you fall off your horse that one time?"

"Bitch, shut up. That was a while back, I bet I got the hang of it now."

You laughed at her. You remember she once went horseback riding with her cousin and you remember getting filled in on every little detail by him. Avni fell off her designated horse multiple times, one of the reasons being she lacked the skill; second, the horse did not like her.

Avni's always liked horses, even though she never got to be around them as much. You remember she mentioned she liked how they looked so elegant and how she'd go around everywhere on horses if she could. Another thing that stuck with you was how she connected freedom with horses.

She always thought the best way to disappear to be on your own and be free would be to escape on a horse. The rush of adrenaline you'd feel, the wind brushing against you, everything about it sounded magical to her. You couldn't disagree.

The three of you got to the barn and Avni instantly rushed towards the horses. You watched as she waved to everyone and looked at the horses. Instantly she stood beside one. The black horse looked like royalty. Its mane was tamed and shiny and she looked clean.

"I want this one."

Rico raised a brow, "You sure? We call her Anxious Astra for a reason," she warned. "Plus, considering you don't have a great history with horses, you may wanna reconsider."

"You heard that shit?" Avni seemed surprised. You and her were whispering the entire time, there's no way Rico could've heard.

She shrugged her shoulders while walking a brown horse out of its stable. "Just saying."

"What's its name?" You pointed at the horse with your eyes.

"This baby's name is Spot. My favourite boy." She walked around the backside of the horse and showed you why he was named that. He had a single white spot on the right side of his body.

You looked around to grab a horse of your own. You found a light brown one standing alone at the end of the stables. It caught your interest. It was buttermilk white with a similarly shaded mane.

You approached the horse slowly and caressed its forehead and muzzle. The horse lowered its head, showing it liked the pets and scratches. You smiled, "Does this one have a name?"

"His name's Cloud. The sweetest thing in this stable."

You guided Cloud out of his stable using the dark blue lead rope and halter. His saddle was brown and heavily padded. You were struggling to get on, that's when Marco saw you. He was nearest to you, so he helped you get seated on Cloud.

"I feel like I'm getting sent off to war." Marco was too sweet, you wanted to be able to tease him for it sometimes. He just shrugged and smiled, waving as Cloud slowly walked out of the barn.

Jean stopped you for a moment. "Hey, do me a favour?"

"It depends on what it is," you shrugged, halting Cloud.

"Grab me a sketchbook and pencils, pens, whatever."

You raised a brow, "You're an artist? I thought that was Armin's thing."

"I can't have hobbies?" He said in a joking manner. "No, Armin enjoys arts like photography or acting. He doesn't draw, instead, he analyzes it."

"Ohhhhhh." You didn't know this. You just assumed Armin liked the arts and knew how to do it. "I'll get it for you."

Rico, Avni and you started taking your leave and got on the road. In a distance, Tyler was watching the three of you. He wasn't at the barn but, he was collecting the crops since winter was coming.

He leaned against the fence, only focusing on you. "What happened to us? We used to be best friends," he directed to Dan, who was with him.

"Yeah. Until you got my girlfriend pregnant, fucking ass," Dan retorted while pulling out beets and carrots.

Silence fell upon them for a minute that felt like an hour. "I want her," Tyler says out of the blue again.

Dan got up from the ground and stood beside Tyler. He squinted his eyes in order to see who his stupid ex-best friend was talking about. He turned to Tyler in disbelief, "That's Kirstein's girl."

"They're not official-" he defended.

"But it's obvious," Dan interrupted right away. "You sure have a thing for taken girls," he scoffed before walking back to the crops.

Tyler exhaled, "What should I do?"

"I don't know man. It's wrong," he started while wiping the thin layer of sweat on his forehead. Dan didn't condone this at all, considering he was hurt by both Tyler and Jessie before. He didn't want Tyler to get in between you and Jean at all because of that. As well as the fact Jean would actually kill him if he tried. Dan could tell Tyler was falling for you too. Again, he didn't condone it but Tyler was his best friend at one point—he didn't want to leave him hanging. "She's stressed about the barn so maybe help her out. I don't know."

Tyler's eyes suddenly widened. He straightened himself up as soon as you were out of sight. "You're right." He resumed pulling the corn off the stalks.

"What were you two talking about?" Tyler and Dan turned around in horror, only to see who they wanted to avoid. Jean. Marco and Connie were accompanying him, smoking a cigarette. Jean noticed how he startled both of them so he explained. "Couldn't smoke around the barn."

"And we were wondering if you needed any help out here," Marco added.

"So? What were you talking about?"

"The short, brown girl," Tyler blurted. "Her name's Avni, isn't it?"

Jean and Connie stared at him with dead eyes. "What about her?"

He rubbed the soul off his palms, "She's hot, isn't she?"

"Avni isn't into guys. She's lesbian," Marco informed him.

Tyler shrugged as if he didn't care, "I can change her mind. She's missing out." Connie, Marco and Jean started feeling uncomfortable while Dan stood there, questioning why he was ever Tyler's friend.

Jean scoffed and took the cigarette from Connie. There was another awkward moment of silence before Tyler decided to open his mouth again. "You know, I'm kinda glad you guys took me in. The women here are nice."

Connie stared at him dumbfounded. "Didn't your girlfriend just die... Like right in front of you too?"

He shrugs again. "I wasn't looking forward to having a kid anyway. Plus, I was starting to get bored of Jessie."

"Watch it," Dan warned as he stopped doing his job for a moment. Tyler completely forgot Dan was around, he forgot he still wasn't forgiven by him either.

Tyler lost track of completely everything after Dan spoke up. He started speaking his mind without even knowing. "I think Sasha and Y/N are pretty cool too. I wanna fuck thei-"

Before he could continue, Jean threw the cigarette onto the ground and grabbed Tyler's collar. "Listen, I've been nice to you. Everyone else has been good to you too. If you ever come near her, say her name or even think about her, I'll fucking kill you," he spat. "You'll be in so much fucking pain, you'll regret ever coming out of your dead mother's womb."

"You don't ever talk about them like that." Connie was starting to get defensive once he heard Sasha's name too but had to help Marco hold Jean back to avoid further issues.

Though Jean's arms were restrained, he still got the last kick in despite being held back. He kicked Tyler in the gut before storming off and mumbling, "Waste of a fucking cig."

Connie followed him and Marco waited until they were out of range. "We're the ones that brought you in. We're also the ones that can exile you. Behave." He looked Tyler up and down in disgust before walking after Connie and Jean. He needed to calm his best friend down.

Meanwhile, you and Avni followed Rico's lead. She carried the map while you two were trying to push each other off the horses. "You two, focus. Stop fooling around before they get pissed and boot you off."

You and Avni snickered. "Sorry," she said as she tried pushing you off one last time. You watched as she got Astra to catch up to Rico and Spot so she wouldn't face the consequences. Avni successfully got the last hit. She turned back at you and stuck out her middle finger and tongue before Rico caught her. You smiled, what a bitch.

The three of you scouted the area and made sure it was clear. You came across a plaza and noticed there was a tiny dollar store in there. The sketchbook, you could grab it for Jean.

You halted and got off of Cloud. "Let's look around the plaza."

Rico and Avni got off their horses too, complying with your wish. Suddenly you heard leaves rustling behind you. All three of you were on guard and placed your hands on your holsters. Avni took her knife out, just in case something did come out of the woods.

You heard the rustling again and were about to walk towards the sound until Avni beat you to it. "I got it." She cautiously stepped forward, trying her best to not make any noise while approaching whatever was there.

A minute passed and you heard some yelling, though you were sure it wasn't Avni's voice. "You bitch!" Okay, now that was Avni.

You and Rico looked at each other, shrugged and decided to jog over to Avni. You actually found her quickly because how the amount of noise she was making, you wouldn't be surprised if a walker found you three.

Well, make that four.

You found Avni on the ground and a small blonde girl on top of her, holding her forearm against her neck. Saying she looked tiny was an understatement. Avni was even bigger than her. The blonde had big, bright blue eyes and her hair was up in a bun to keep her long hair out of her face. She was wearing a loose brown t-shirt and black yoga pants that were unintentionally ripped, exposing her knee.

Honestly, you couldn't help but laugh at the sight. "Yo, Avni! You just gonna let Blondie take you down like that?"

Avni rolled her eyes and chuckled at your comment before looking back up at the blonde. "Hey princess, wanna get off?"

Rico looked beyond confused. She couldn't figure out why Avni seemed to be flirting with the woman who had taken her knife away from her and could attack her at any given moment. "What's going on here?"

Avni smiled while answering, "This is Miss Historia Reiss. We went to high school together." She looked back at Historia and continued because it seemed as though she didn't remember Avni. "The lesbian cheerleader you made fun of? Does that ring a bell?"

The way Historia's eyes widened shouldn't have been funny at all. She immediately got off Avni and apologized as she helped her up. "God Historia, you look like shit."

"I'm aware, thanks," she mumbled while looking down at her clothes.

Before anyone could say anything else, Rico sighed. "Dollar store? Hurry up, there's shit we have to do after this too."

The three of you were about to leave but then you stopped in your tracks. Something was wrong. Historia was hiding from something—someone. You heard a door open and laughter coming from within the plaza.

"Rico, Avni!" You whisper-yelled. "Get back here!" They looked at you as if you were crazy once again so you yanked them down. They were taking too long.

"What are you-"

"Shh," you shut Rico down. You pointed towards the plaza and that's when they understood. There were four men walking around from store to store. They walked towards their car to put some supplies down. You squinted your eyes, narrowing your vision and fixating on the vehicle. There were two others in the car and it looked like there was also a woman in there. "Historia, what's going on?" You finally asked.

She looked ashamed. "Those men were after us. My girlfriend, she told me to run away and they took her. They have her in that car."

Avni snickered, "You made fun of me for being lesbian and now you have a girlfriend."

"I was in the fucking closet Avni, shut up," she said while rolling her eyes, only resulting in Avni laughing even harder. She couldn't get over the irony. "Just... Help me get her back."

You kept an eye on the car and saw the silhouettes of the two men and Historia's girlfriend. It looked disturbing. "Don't worry, we will."

You were the first one to get up and sneak out of the bushes. You rushed behind the nearest store and peeked over to see where they were at. They had a few more stores to go through before they emptied out the entire plaza.

This meant you had to think of something fast in order to help Historia and her girlfriend.

The three of them followed after you and hid behind the same store. "What are you planning on doing Y/N," Rico asked.

"Well, we can't just leave her out there. Those men don't look like they have the right intentions," you answered.

Avni walked over to look at the situation herself. If anyone knew how to plan, it was her. "They're going around in order. If we get to that last store before they do, we have a chance."

As usual, she did not disappoint. Avni was observing them whilst making fun of Historia and figured the little detail out back there. "We'll enter through the back door and wait for them to come in. When they do, we fucking attack them one by one. Y/N can do that easily. Ackerman blood and all," she said, nudging your shoulder for encouragement. "We got this, they don't know we're here."

Luckily for you four, the stores were attached to each other so you were able to run down without being seen. There was one large gap you needed to get through though and time was running up. You didn't know how long they were spending in each store and they were already near the end.

Avni's impulsiveness created a path for all of you. She ran out first and hid behind the abandoned cars just to run again. Just like that, the gap was no longer a problem and you were already closer to the last store.

Rico had a spare gun on her and passed it over to Historia just in case she needed it. She opened the door slowly, trying to make as minimal noise as possible. It was also a success. The four of you quickly looked around the store to search for walkers so they wouldn't be a problem.

Walkers would've been a huge problem actually. Keeping a low profile would've been harder to do if there were any zombies trying to eat you alive. They wouldn't shut up and would practically kill you, one way or another.

There was only one walker insight and Historia took care of it with a garden rake that was laying around. She pushed the stick up the walker's chin and managed to reach its brain.

You all walked to the front of the store and peeked through the blinds. You were glad there were blinds, it kept you hidden and you knew what was going on out there. You watched as the men came out with nothing. They looked... Mad? "Are they actually looking for supplies or are they looking for Blondie?"

"They're looking for you?" Avni repeated but Historia didn't answer either of you. The silence said enough.

You looked back out the window to see the car again. You had a better view of it now and saw Historia's girlfriend. She had short brown hair that rested at her nape, her eyes were an intimidating grey, you could notice them from far away.

"Where is she?!" One of the men yelled at her. The brunette didn't answer and got hit for it. The man pulled her hair, "Where is she, bitch?"

"I don't know," you heard the woman say. "Even if I did know, I would never fucking tell you," she spat before she got punched in the face again.

Historia looked away from the blinds and turned her back away from the entrance. She hugged her knees tight and hid her head away from everyone. You couldn't blame her, the amount of guilt she was probably feeling right now was definitely killing her. These men were brutal.

Rico looked away in disgust too. "I'm going to kill each and every one of them."

"They're going to rot in Hell," Avni added.

You took your knife out of your holster as you watched the men come towards the store. You made it on time after all. "Shh. Get ready, they're coming."

Rico and Avni snuck to the other side of the door while you and Historia stayed put. You were all ready to attack as soon as the door pulled open. The footsteps of the men got louder and everyone got their weapons out. Historia found a knife laying around the store and picked it up rather than using the gun. It would've made too much noise.

You and Historia slowly got up as soon as you heard the voices right outside the door. Just as you two got steady, the door swung open and two men looked around the store. The door shut behind them and you got a hold of one of their collars, instantly putting him in a chokehold. Avni did the same on the other side. You held the knife against his throat and shushed him, "Scream and I'll fucking kill you."

"Slice his fucking neck open," Avni whispered to you while digging her knife into the skin of the other man, causing a stroke of blood to start leaking from him. "There's still two more. We'll get our hands full."

"No. Not yet-"

Avni rolled her eyes, "Fine," she said before slitting the man's throat. His blood splattered onto your white shirt and neck as soon as she did it. It spilled out of him and there was no end to it. She dropped his body onto the ground before stabbing him in his head so he wouldn't turn into a walker. She did the exact opposite of what you said.

Before you could say anything, another man walked through the door and noticed he stepped in blood. He looked up slowly and met his eyes with yours. With haste, he pulled his gun out and was about to put it against your head until Rico kicked him down. He fell down and hit his head against the aisle's corner and dropped his gun. Instead of killing him, Rico kicked him in his abdomen and put her finger over her mouth, gesturing to be quiet.

As soon as Rico had him under control, you grabbed the gun that fell right beside you and hit the man in the head with the butt of the gun. You had to knock the man out in order to keep him restrained. You got up and walked towards your best friend. "Avni!" You yelled. "What the fuck was that?"

"They aren't good people. In fact, we should kill these fuckers too."

"We're not going to kill them. There was another way to do this-"

"There wasn't! They outnumbered us and it would've gotten out of control," she shouted back.

Historia and Rico looked at you two and started looking at the men on the ground. "Wait, guys-"

You and Avni didn't hear Historia calling for you two. "It wouldn't have gotten out of control. We could've just knocked them out with the guns and left," you continued in a sturdy tone.

"You're forgetting we're in the middle of an apocalypse Y/N. You saw what they did to her in that car, zombies aren't the only monsters roaming around." Avni matched your voice. "They were still looking for Historia too, they would've tracked us down and all of us could still be in danger. You do realize that right?"

"We could've taken their car and weapons. They were going to be stranded here and left to be eaten alive. You just had to get your hands dirty. What if they have a group? They're going to fucking come for our necks."

"There were four of them," Historia mumbled. You and Avni turned to Historia and looked confused. She was speaking in a hushed tone, neither of you heard her.

"What?"

"Speak up Princess, we can't hear you."

"There were four of them outside. There's only three here," she repeated.

You and Avni looked around at the unconscious men and looked up at each other. There were only three. Suddenly Avni wasn't beside you anymore. You turned around and there she was with a knife against her throat. You saw he was slowly digging into her skin too, there was a hint of blood on the blade of the knife.

He chuckled sadistically, "Tell me why I shouldn't kill her right now?" He raised the knife's edge against her cheek, making a small 'x'. You watched as the blood dripped down her face and onto his hands. "Disgusting."

You looked around. He didn't come from the entrance, you would've seen him and knocked him out too. Your eyes fixated on the light coming from the back of the store and it hit you—they knew you were here. They sent one of their men to come in from the back.

You understood what Avni meant now. It's the end of the world. Majority of the human race was dead, if not, they lost their morals and sanity. You thought about the people at the farmhouse, they lost their sanity too. You should've kept that in mind when you came out here. The second you saw the men raise their hand on Historia's girlfriend, you should've known this was a life or death situation.

"Go ahead, do it bitch," you heard Avni say. She really needs to stop doing that. You remembered how she did the same with Rico when you first encountered everyone.

You took a deep breath in and put both your weapons on the ground, raising your hands up to surrender. "We can talk about this-"

"What is there to fucking talk about whore?" He spat. "You killed them!"

You shook your head, "No, they're not dead! Just unconscious." You crouched down again and placed two fingers on a man's neck to check his pulse. "See, his pulse is still there! These two are still alive. Can you let her go now, please?"

The man continued to chuckle and the knife was scarring Avni deeper. "She's the one that slit my brother's throat, isn't she?"

"No-"

"Yeah, it was me. Now go on, do it pussy," Avni provoked further.

You knew exactly what she was thinking just by the look on her face. You could tell she thought about what you said and was taking that into consideration. She thought if they took her life, they would probably leave you and the farm alone. But she was scared. Though she wasn't scared she was facing death head-on. She was scared of the outcome of her death. Avni was ready to sacrifice herself in order to keep everyone else unharmed but it was just a whim. She couldn't guarantee you would be safe after the fact and that terrified her.

You looked at her as if she was crazy but she only closed her eyes, trying to reassure you it was okay.

It wasn't okay though. You couldn't lose her. Avni was your best friend from when you two barely knew how to speak. You were each other's ride or die; two halves of one idiot; the only one's there for each other.

You remembered the first time you met Avni. She was new to the area and lived on the same street as you. One evening, she was walking down the street with her mother and your mom recognized her quickly. They both worked in the same office but in different departments. Your mom was ranked in a higher position than she was.

They started talking and they were both definitely shit-talking about their boss. You remembered your mom hated his existence and assumed Avni's mom did too, what else would they bond over anyway?

At the time, you were just four and Avni was three. While your mothers talked, you were blowing bubbles until you noticed the little girl watching you. You waved as a greeting but her tiny body clutched onto her mother tightly. To think Avni was the shy one back then makes you laugh, it's so contradicting. Her mom noticed quickly and told her it was okay, you were almost the same age and she could play with you. She didn't budge though.

It took a while for Avni to start warming up to you. As much as you remember, it took her two or three months to do so. You could quite literally call her a butterfly.

You two would hang out whenever you came back from school since you started a year earlier than she did. Whenever she'd come over, she was your sanity without even being aware of it. She was there for you after your mother changed. All you two would do was play with each other but it was enough comfort one kid can provide to another.

You'd see each other in the halls, whenever you did, she would smile, run up to you and give you a hug. That's when you realized you were her only friend. She never got along with any of her other classmates and you remembered hearing Avni's mother talking to yours about it because she was worried.

About two years later, just when Avni was entering grade school, she started to become more reckless. This wasn't her coming out of her shell, this was the outcome of something else. She would fight anyone who looked at her for too long or throw tantrums if she was hungry. Sometimes, she'd storm out of class too. You were usually called to find her because the teachers knew you were the only person Avni would cooperate with.

There was this one day where Avni was in the school infirmary because she decided to pick up a fight with someone who was much bigger than she was. You were called down again and after seeing her state, you were also starting to get concerned. "What happened this time?" You questioned as you tied her hair into a ponytail.

"My classmate's brother was trying to scare me off."

"Why?"

"Because I hit his brother the day before."

You sighed and moved the loose hair out of her face. "Why do you do this Avni? Your parents are worried about you."

"My parents don't care about me," she huffed bluntly.

As the older one, you felt the need to comfort her. "Don't say that, your mom and dad love you. You guys are a happy little family."

"No we aren't Y/N," she muttered. "If we were, he wouldn't hit us."

Now, if someone were to overhear you two having this conversation, they would probably think you were mature for a second grader or that you're too young for this. They wouldn't be lying though, you were forced to grow up due to your own circumstances but, you didn't think Avni would have to go through the same.

"Ma says she's gonna leave him every time but she never does," she said, looking down at her feet while she kicked them in the air.

You didn't think Avni was being abused at home. Her mother would be so happy whenever she would talk to yours, you had no clue. She was only in the first grade. You didn't want her to be in the same situation as you were.

Without thinking much, you pulled her in for a hug. You didn't know how else to comfort her, you were both so young. She finally broke down and started crying, "I don't want them to separate, I want him to change."

When Avni was in fifth grade, she informed you her parents were finally getting a divorce and she chose to live with her mom. As she was telling you, your gaze fell to her thighs. Her shorts were a bit lifted and you noticed fresh red cuts down there. There was no way she didn't tell you about this. Why did she always choose to suffer in silence? She swore she didn't care about it but those words stuck with you for a while, as well as the image of her scarred skin.

Growing up alongside Avni was never the easiest for both of you. You were both exposed to vile shit when you were younger and never had an outlet. You two both had a fair share of fights with one another, breakdowns, attempts and hospital visits, yet neither of you backed down.

You two were always there for each other, through thick and thin. There was absolutely no way you were about to let her go.

"Let her go. We'll leave without causing any problems."

He laughed in your face. "It's an eye for an eye baby. She killed my fucking brother."

You felt drumming in your ears and you were starting to get upset now. "That's unfair. You already have one of us in that car," you blurted without thinking twice.

"One of us?" He mocked. "No honey, you got it all wrong. Those two are in our group. Blondie just decided to run away with her fucking girlfriend and now they're leeching off of you-"

A bullet was fired and the man dropped dead. It was Historia Reiss who shot him in the head. Avni exhaled and wiped the excess blood that was dripping down her face and neck.

Your first instinct was to run up to your best friend and hug her. "You stupid fucking bitch," you cussed. "Don't ever pull that shit again."

She hugged you back, "You know I'm just playing Y/N."

"Other people don't!" Rico nodded in agreement, considering Avni and her have already been in that position before.

"Sorry," she whispered.

You two let go and you grabbed your weapons off the ground. "There's still two more out there. They probably heard the gunfire. Don't. Let. Them. Drive. Away." You faced Historia, "You should've told us you were with them first." She shrugged her shoulders in an apologetic manner but you dismissed it because you understood. You wouldn't want to be a part of that group either.

This time, you walked out of the store out of impulse. You just wanted to get this over with and didn't care to think of a plan, plus, they could've gotten away. You slid the top of the gun back, resetting the clip. One of the men was already out of the car, either getting ready to drive away or to check whatever was going on inside.

He pointed his gun at you and started shooting. You crouched quickly and hid behind a trash can waiting for the gunfire to stop. As soon as you heard him reloading his gun, you took the chance and aimed at him. You were initially aiming for his head but were only able to shoot him in the thigh. He whined in pain before you shot him again, this time in the shoulder.

You ran towards the vehicle while staying low, knowing the other man was going to make an attempt to attack you as well. This motherfucker was smart though. He brought Historia's girlfriend out of the car and used her as his shield. You peeked over the hood of the car and noticed she was in a horrible state. Her lip and forehead were bleeding and she looked like she was barely conscious. It enraged you.

The man kept coming forward, shooting in your direction to scare you off while still using her as a guard. You looked back at the store and realized no one was coming out to help you and it began to frighten you. What if the men were awake again? You just left them in there.

As soon as your thoughts were consuming you once again, you saw them running in the woods. Avni was leading them and they were coming towards you. You figured out what she was trying to do and continued to shoot. It was a gunfight.

You were able to skim his arm with a bullet before Historia came up from behind him and threw her gun at his head. She knew she wouldn't be able to knock him out with the butt of her gun because of the height difference, neither did she want to accidentally hurt her girlfriend so she resorted to throwing it.

She got him though, that's all that mattered. He wasn't unconscious but he lost his balance. Historia's girlfriend head butt him with all her remaining strength and you kicked him onto the ground. He still had his gun in his hand and you didn't want that to cause another problem. You stepped on his wrist, forcing him to let go and Rico grabbed his gun from the ground.

You looked at Avni, your eyes were clearly questioning whether she wanted to kill him or not. Both of you had different approaches but you still wanted to double-check with her so you wouldn't have to fight. It was obvious she felt the same because she shook her head.

You nodded discreetly and started to punch him. He tried fighting back but was too weak. By the time you were done dealing with him, his face was oozing with blood and he was officially knocked unconscious. You pierced a bullet into the tires of their car so they wouldn't be able to go anywhere, nor follow you. You all agreed that was enough killing for today and spared their lives.

As for the two that died, rest in piss.

series masterlist | previous | chapter eight

#jean kirstein #jean kirstein fanfiction #jean kirschtien #jean kirstein angst #jean kirsten smut #aot jean #jean kirstein fluff #aot fanfiction #attack on titan #connie springer #eren jaeger #sasha braus #armin alert #mikasa ackerman #aot angst

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