#why sooooo much dog stuff

[whippetcrimes]

I have think there's something wrong with me.

I have one singular dog. Since I've gotten Misty, I've purchased 8 collars, 2 leashes, and 1 slip leash. In addition to these, I already had 3 leashes, Misty came home with a collar, and a puppy sized martingale slip leash.

Why am I about to buy yet another leash????

#sam literally had 3 collars and 1 leash his entire 10 years of life #and one of those got so gross rolling in the woods that i tossed it #why sooooo much dog stuff #like i feel like it all has a purpose and a place but still #the bf was complaining about the amount of dog stuff we have for one dog and concerned about how much more there will be soon #well. soonish. felony may just be coming home in may. assuming we get one from this upcoming litter #i think if there are at least 6 pups then the odds are good #to be fair though of that dog stuff that she didn't come with she's grown out of or irreparably worn out half the collars #and two of the leashes are only used when we go camping as a tie out extender. part of random junk i aquired from family home #and also the leash i want is for hiking! ruffwear hitchhiker. looks good #(as the bf said. another dog item for a specific purpose) #anyways anyways. hopefully the rest of dogblr has way more than i do so i can feel less like a hoarder of dog supplies #i need it all okay #quick going out to the yard collar and leash #minimal but pretty short leash and collar #easily cleaned but still attractive collar and leash #house collar #nylon tagless collar for unforeseen collar needs #and now a handsfree leash for hiking #it just fits. the real question is why do i want to buy a matching harness for it too

[i4oba]

haechan as… 💭 / your study buddy ⊹◞✿

haechan as your study buddy sounds like a complete nightmare

I KNOWWWW

but hear me out… Hear!!!!! me out I swear

when he’s determined, he can focus, it just takes … a bit too much in him to do that

not because he’s stupid, he’s super super smart when he’s actually trying

but you know… there are courses that are pain in the ass and you cannot even deny that

and as complete opposites.. you Do care about it, meanwhile he Does NOT give a shit about those

like he couldn’t care less if he failed introduction to philosophy

he doesn’t even know why he has to complete that course. like what’s the fucking point..

FUCK HEGEL???likeee

but you were hella determined to help him out and kind of motivate him

i mean, he wouldn’t mind a little extra cash as a scolarship either ???The least he can do is just sit down and study

that’s how it always have been anyways, ever since middle school

studying together at the library, solving math problems and talking shit in between two of these sessions

the latter part was hyuck’s favourite honestly, he’s such a shittalker fr (i get it, i am too)

he knows basically every gossip… that’s how it always have been! (he knew about the crush jisung had on one of the seniors back in high school and was sooooo into this little affair he singlehandedly ruined his chances… by accidentally spilling it all to the girlie… Oops was all he said too like LMFAO)

he starts and ends all of your uni study sessions with gossips as well honestly

he says it should be a sandwich (or some bullshit idk)–one nasty rumour, some molecular biology and one lighthearted gossip as a way to finish

letting some steam off

he’s not even sorry about it.. at least he has something to look forward to everytime you meet

he’s such a big gossiper it’s actually crazy

and when he gets soooo into it, his voice gets all squeaky and shit lol

him studying journalism doesn’t even help at all, like why is he so fucking interested in this

he says he wants to work at atlantic but… what are the chances? HE SHOULD STUDY

and that’s why you two were there!!! nose should be buried in books!!!!!!!

but his is… well, behind the screen of his phone, going through his instagram dms and showing off other girl’s messages

some extremely cute ones and some embarrassing love confessions as well

you cannot help but laugh when you see someone replying to his thirst trap stories with heart eyed emojis and shit

especially when you can recall how you literally called him a loser in your reply

i mean, you were right after all Lmfao

he knows you’re joking though.. he knows he’s hot as fuck and the most important: he knows that you know

but let’s get back to our main point ???Duh

you were Sat at one of the lesser crowded corners of the campus library, surrounded by a couple of notebooks, one half cup of coffee that has long gone cold, and your laptop–meanwhile hyuck only had one, pretty small notebook he used for every lecture he had, and it had been…

through a lot (as if a dog chewed on it or something but really it’s just that he didn’t care about it)

but anywaaaaays… in the first like, ten minutes he was actually working??? studying his stuff???? Even telling you some fun facts he could remember

like that’s how he is naturally, his method of learning is teaching at the same time as well

which is actually such a useful way imo, that’s how i do as well lmfao

but then you had to avert your attention and do the rest of your research paper to finally finish the project.. it had been ages since you’ve started and you were nowhere near the finish line

so he just.. went on his phone instead. he thrives on attention and when you’re not giving it to him… well YEAAAHHH

he intentionally puts the volume of his phone pretty high so he can annoy you with the sound of him typing and shit

going through tiktok and all

he’s such an asshole for that

but you like the presence of him. it’s soothing kinda that he’s .. there?? clearly not studying but keeping you company

i mean, doing this all alone would be rather depressing, isn’t it? You’re not a big fan of that

so he stays. because he’s aware.

and maybe, with some extra help, he could learn his material.. you just gotta take break more frequent so he can act like as if he was a lecturer ahah

mansplaining and shit ijbol

and at the end??? at the crack of the night??? walking you back to your dorm???? he’s the one offering you two should do this again soon

not tomorrow, he adds–there’s a frat party he’s expected to attend

but after that????He’s excited to do it again :P

#nct dream #nct dream headcanons #nct dream imagines #nct #nct dream fluff #nct dream scenarios #nct dream writings #nct dream stories #nct dream x reader #nct imagines #haechan imagines #haechan #haechan x reader #haechan x you #haechan scenarios #haechan fluff

[darylsdelts]

Hi! Could you write a Daryl x f.reader hc in the mornings? I feel like slow mornings would be Daryl's favorite time of day, just enjoying his partner without having to think about the day ahead..

P.S: how did you not start writing sooner?? I love how your pretty brain brings our delusions to life lol

I’m gonna do the smaller request’s first so that they don’t pile up because having loads of requests makes me anxious😭 idk why but I’m getting to em all!

Anon!!! I love this so much! I love domestic daddy Daryl so much like yes! Idc what anyone says, he’s sooooo husband! And alsooooo… TYSM! I’m not really a writer😭 I didn’t intend to actually write on here but people started sending full on essays for me to write so why not. I did write some stuff on Wattpad though that I could post here??? If y’all want??? Anywayyyyyssss ily!

I always imagine these sorta things with you and Daryl in a secluded cabin, away from the community. You’re still part of the group but you and Daryl prefer to be alone together.

Living away from the community, Daryl is like a different person, he’s way more relaxed and less on guard. Less irritated by people too.

The sunlight seeps through the cracks in the curtains in the early mornings.

Daryl usually wakes up first but if he doesn’t then you shift closer, resting your chin on his bare chest and admiring his sleeping face.

His hair framing his relaxed face, he looks younger when he’s sleeping, your favourite part is how his rounded nose twitches when he starts to wake up.

As soon as he opens his eyes, you feel his chest vibrate as he hums, bringing his hand up to push a strand of hair behind your ear.

“What’d I tell ya ‘bout starin’, Hm?”

His lips twitch upward, he fucking loves the mornings when it’s so peaceful and it’s just him and you, like the world doesn’t really exist.

“I think you told me to quit it”

He chuckles, rubbing his thumb across your forehead.

Daryl thinks you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, especially when your hair is messy from sleep and you’re in barely any clothes.

There’s no doubt that every morning, his mind drifts to thinking about staying in bed with you all day, worshipping your body and making you feel good.

And that fantasy is almost always thrown out the window when the both of you hear paws enter the room, dog jumping up on the bed, licking at Daryls face.

“Dog! Jesus chri-… yeah, okay okay, good boy”

After getting out of bed, Daryl pulling on just his jeans that sit low on his waist and you in a thin night dress, you both go to the kitchen area.

Daryl feeds dog so he stops whining and then he’ll cook up something he hunted and serve it to you.

You’re greatful for your hunterman, taking such good care of you.

Even after being together all these years, Daryl still gets shy, sitting opposite you whilst eating, barely able to make eye contact.

Some mornings, if it was hot enough, you’d go swim in the lake with dog whilst Daryl would watch over the both of you. He’s not greatly fond of swimming in the lake since he wouldn’t be able to protect you as well as he could from the side.

“Can we go to the lake?” You ask as Daryl takes your plates.

“Ya wanna? Ain’t so hot out today, darlin’”

“I wanna”

He’d roll his eyes, he could never say no to you.

He’d sit on the bank next to the lake, watching you in just your panties and bra, swimming around in the water with dog.

After you get out you’d complain that it’s too cold and he’d bite his tongue, he did tell you so.

He’d wrap you in a towel and leave you shivering whilst he towels dog off.

“Shouldn’ta let ya go in the damn water, yer gon’ get sick”

You’d pout as you shiver, Daryl wraps his arms round you, kissing the top of your hair.

“Let’s get ya inside, warm my girl up”

You have a feeling you know what he means.

This isn’t even really hc’s 😭 full on story I’m sorry but I always get so carried away.

#daryl dixon imagine #the walking dead fanfiction #twd daryl #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl x reader #norman reedus #daryl dixon smut #daryl smut #twd smut

[ratcash-wasgud]

So like you know that one anime my dress up darling? Yeah so basically Mizu AU that but Mizu's a photographer who loves anime stuff and reader who's her fav cosplayer

Reader does a lot of risque cosplay stuff though and makes Mizu blush having to take close up shots of her body :3

hey lovely!

i've never seen this anime lmao, but this sounds good so I'll give it a go !!

I also made some audios for this one, beause RAAAAAAAAHHHHH I'M FERAL

(btw this is pretty short, and kinda unfinished but I didn't just want to leave this one in the drafts forever.)

"Okay, could you...hold your hand up a little? Like...to your face?" Mizu mumbles from behind the camera, her tounge darting up to wet her lips. She has done this a couple times before, doing a free photshoot for you while you're in cosplay. Not only because it has both of her favourite things: Anime and pretty women, but because well...it's you.

She has seen your cosplays online a couple times, so when she ran into you on a con, and she asked for you number to do a photshoot later, and you said yes despite her suttering, she almost wet her pants in excitement.

She loves taking pictures of you, in and out of cosplay too. During your three months of knowing eachother Mizu has developed a fat crush on you. She has realized that under you lovely exterior, you're so very sweet on the inside. You always smile even when her camera isn't in her hands, and you bring her sweets and little gifts everytime, as if you owe her anything. If anything, she owes you for letting her gawk at you.

This time is different though. Mizu couldn't take one single usebale picture so far, because her hands are violently shaking. The reason is simple...today's cosplay is Misato, from NGE. But this time, you have your Misato wig and makeup on, but you're outfit consist of a towel wrapped around you, referencing that one scene where she runs out of the bathroom. Why? It's niche. And you love niche stuff.

"Okay uhm...sorry, can we...take a quick break?" Mizu lowers the camera, needing to take a deep breath. She has never been this close to an almost naked woman before, and it's fuzzing up her brain. Plus that almost naked woman happens to be you, so she definetly needs a breather.

"Yeah, sure." You say, straightening your back and getting out of the pose you were just doing. "Is anything the matter?" You ask, giving her that sweet, but so oblivios look she love-hates. It's unbelievable to her that someone as hot as you can be so unaware of the effect she has on people.

"No, no, I just...it's just...I need a bathroom break." Mizu says, not really wanting to admit how insanely attracted to you she is. It would help sooooo much if you knew by default. She escapes to the bahtroom like the coward she is, and washes her face. She checks her phone just to see the groupchat blowing up.

Taigen: omg are u dead yet?

Akemi: staaawp she is probs nervous leave her alone >:(

Ringo: Is she still there? Tell her she is pretty and her smile shines like a thousand suns!

Taigen: dumb ass advice

Taigen: tell her her ass looks good

Akemi: can u stop acting like a dog

Taigen: why it usually works

Mizu just sighs as she reads the texts. They are definetly not helping. She comes out of the bathroom in the same helpless state she was in before. When she sees you again, you're leaning against the wall, the towel slipping a little lower, giving Mizu a clear picture of where your areola starts. She swallows hard, but it's somehow dry and tries her best at wiping her sweaty hands in her pants in the least obvious way.

She must've been staring for a while because you hit her with a "What?" and a chuckle.

"Uh...nothing." Mizu blinks rapidly to snap herself back to reality. "Just uh...you know." Mizu awkwardly gestures at her chest, micking a pulling up motion. "Your uh...fans might die if I took pictures like that."

You look down, realising your towel has slipped. "Oh...Oh God, sorry!" You akwardly laugh as you pull it up. "Jesus...that's so embarasisng." You say, trying to laugh it off.

"No, no, it uh....shouldn't be embarssing. It's fine." Mizu says, waving her hands around in a way that's supposed to be dismissing. "I liked it." She adds quietly.

But, it somehow made it's way to your ears, as you lifted an eyebrow.

"You...did?" You chuckle, tilting your head.

"Uh, I..." Mizu is stunned. Fuuuuuuuuuuck nobody ever hears what she's mumbling why now? Why the most embarassing thing ever?

#blue eye samurai #bes mizu #blue eye samurai mizu #mizu x reader #blue eye samurai x reader #bes x reader #mizu fanfic #fanfiction

[littlest-nightingale]

10th Doctor agere thoughts bc I am not immune to the Doctor, apparently:

The regressor equivalent of a huge dog who doesn't realize he isn't a little lapdog anymore

Seriously he's gonna give his cgs a concussion if he isn't careful

Every one of his companions end up as his caregiver sooner or later

Very quickly switches between perfectly fine and having a panic attack. He's very,,,, fragile, when he's regressed.

He's also incredibly clingy. Please don't leave, please don't leave him, he doesn't want to be alone again =[

He sometimes goes through phases where he convinces himself that he's better off without a cg, because he knows he'll end up alone eventually and figures it's better not to get attached to someone he knows isn't going to be with him forever. Those phases never last more than a week.

He's so much lighter than he should be, or at least he's lighter than he looks like he should be, so it's easy for him to be carried around. Unfortunately he's very. Limbs. He's so lanky that his regressed brain isn't quite sure what to do with his limbs.

Do not let him anywhere near the control panel of the TARDIS. The last thing everyone needs is a toddler aged timelord running around medieval Germany or something. [Because yes, he will try to use the TARDIS while small, if he's bored enough, and yes, he has done it before and it ended very poorly.]

He's fascinated by makeup I think. He's fascinated by a lot of things humans do, but I think he would like makeup. Rose and Martha have both done his makeup on several occasions =D

Hyper! He's got sooooo much energy most of the time and gets very bored in the TARDIS. Goes to the park quite a lot. Martha is working on getting him to not dig holes in the ground. Yes, worms are fun and all, but please don't tear up the grass looking for them, we're on public property.

Has toys but not because he wants to play with them, but because he wants to take them apart.

Doesn't care about the stigma around regression at all. He's an alien with a time travelling police box, why would he? Honestly, his regression is the most normal part about him. So yeah, he's going to go play on that playground even though he's physically a grown man, and he isn't going to give a fuck about the people watching.

He likes to bring stuff to his cg/companion, like how cats bring you dead animals, so his companions end up with a lot of cool sticks and shiny coins and acorns and feathers and whatever else he just happens to find on the street.

I think a dog would be good for him. He needs a friend to help him burn off energy, and also that mental image is adorable, so I'd imagine that he ends up frequenting local shelters a lot, just to keep the dogs company

Forgets to eat until he's actually starving, at which point he becomes really whiny until he gets something in his system

#sfw age regression #agere #fandom agere #doctor who agere #tenth doctor agere

[tizeline]

I was actually wondering what the Sep Au Brothers feel about fashion? I read an analysis the other day about Rise Donnie and he seems to have the best fashion sense out of them all (and may or may not have his own fashion line?? Idk but I love that idea)

So I was wondering if it was the same or different for your Donnie? Do the Drax brothers have more of a yokai fashion sense or like- idk, what do they think of human fashion?

I have no idea is that makes sense but words are difficult

I think I've seen the same post actually, haha! Yeah, I really like the idea of Donnie being into fashion, and I don't see why it would be different for AU Donnie. As for the Drax Bros, I mentioned it in This Post but their outfits are mostly inspired by what Draxum wears, which in universe would be explained by them wanting to be like their father by emulating his sense of style. After the whole Redemption Arc thing and the Draxum family decides to abandon their Evil Plan, the trio might start exploring and developing their own taste in fashion.

Leo I feel like would be quite excited to try out human clothes, considering he already has an interest in human stuff. It might actually end up being a bit of a bonding experience for him and Donnie when they properly become friends, with Donnie helping Leo find the right outfits for him!

Mikey and Raph would proably still mostly stick to yōkai clothes, while they do eventually become, not just more open-minded about humanity, but also curious about it, they'd still wanna stick to what they're familiar with.

Actually, with Raph it might be more of a necessity. It would be really hard to find human clothes that'd fit his size, and also work with his spikes. Yōkai on the other hand are a lot more diverse physically than humans, so the people in the Hidden City who work with designing and creating clothes would take that into consideration. So needless to say it would be easier for Raph to find yōkai clothes that fit him rather than human clothes.

Seasons probably don't effect the Hidden City that much, I'd assume? Cuz it's underground? So the Drax turtles might not have that much experince with seasons. Still, I don't think they'd love winter considering the fact that they're reptiles and as such are more sensitive to cold. (I think Draxum would've made sure they're more resistant to cold than normal turtles, it would be quite inconvinient if they started brumating in the middle of a fight just cuz it was snowing lol, but they're still more susceptible to it than mammals)

I think Mikey would appreciate autumn, when all the leaves turn a vibrant orange. Both because as an artist he'd appreciate the autumn aesthetic and because... y'know, orange. I think all the bros would like summer cuz, again, reptile biology, they'd like the heat.

I'd assume yokai would have their own unique holidays that the Draxum family would celebrate, no idea what those would be, though.

Draxum has definitely informed his sons about how dangerous Big Mama is and how bad it would be if she found out that they were literally created with her favorite champion's stolen DNA. They don't like her and know to avoid her, if any business is being done between their family and Big Mama then Draxum is the one who handles most of the negotiations.

And lastly - episodes like Todd Scouts and Snow Day, and then The Mud Dogs - none of these I have figured anything out for of how they would be handled in the AU sooooo no answer for ya there, sorry!

#tizel art #Tiz Sep AU #tmnt #rottmnt #rottmnt au

[xxxdegenerate]

Hiya! I saw you're in need of requests!

Ok one piece. Luffy. He is always for weird New people who Peaks his interest

Sooooo. Magician! A real life magician! He would freak out 🤣

The Crew wary, thinking she would hex them or use them to practice curses or other morbid stuff but she is just so sweet! She helps the Crew with her magic, like Chopper or sanji introduce him magic plants he can use for cooking etc. Luffy is more than happy to have her and when Marines come, ready to attack, she just Flicks her hand and the ship gets destroyed in one go, humming before returning to her previous task 🤣🤣

Pls! You would make my day!

I love writing OP reader, and I don't even know why. THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST. (it's acc cool as fuck to imagine this)

Luffy x Magician!Reader

❥note ;; Magician? Hell yee, I feel like I could have done better, or maybe I will write an actual story about this, because it seems really interesting!

❥tw ;; Fighting, cursing // not proofread

You walked the trail on the island you grew up in. Wearing a cape, with some gloves and a hat. The sun was setting and the breeze was calm. You were the odd one out, but that didn't stop you from having a little fun.

You waved your hand around, causing leaves around you to float about. You smiled as you lifted them up into the air. Going in circles before making various shapes.

All of a sudden, big explosions were sounded in the town just ahead. Now as much as you hate this town, and the pirates that accompany it. You rushed over, using your powers to push yourself faster.

Upon arriving, you noticed the towns people and the pirates were in a heated fight. You looked around, trying to figure out why. You snapped your fingers and some cards appeared into the air, surrounding you.

"Ah the weirdo decides to join in hah?" The captain of the lowlife pirates. You rolled your eyes and turned to face the woman. "What are you doing with the town?" You noticed how the houses were getting torn down and fights happening all around. You also happened to notice someone whiz past you and a loud laugh.

Although you decided to shake that off and keep your attention on the lady. "Just finally taking what is ours."

You flicked your hand and cards went towards her. Blowing up.

She coughed and whipped out her sword. "Two can pl-" She was tackled to the ground and a black haired boy with a strawhat sat on top of her. "What-" You choked out.

One of her crew?

You haven't seen him around here, so he must be. You flicked your hand and the two of them go flying. "Weeeee!" You heard the boy laugh.

"Who are you?" A voice, from behind you. You turn around as one of your cards stop at his neck. You narrow your eyes.

"Why are you tearing apart this town." You demanded an answer.

He tilted his head in response as he took a bite out of the chunk of meat he somehow got. "Tearing? AH woah! Your hat!" He looked confused before pointing at your hat in surpise.

"I have one too! Yours is different." You shook your head and turned around, throwing some of the other pirates off of the people.

"Woah! How do you do that?" You deadpan at the boy who followed you around.

"Are you apart of this fight or not?"

"Join my crew!"

"No! You're ruining this town!"

"No were not, that's not my friends." You were confused, you decided to just blast some smoke and go back towards the fight.

Soon, a pile of pirates sat in the center of the town. Smoke and fire erupting around. "Y/n! You did it again!" The elder lady came and thanked you.

You looked around at the town, meeting the eyes of the boy from earlier. He held a wide smile on his face. "That was cool! Join my crew."

"Who are you?"

"Luffy! I'm going to be the king of pirates."

"Sorry dude, but me and pirates do not get along." You were hesitant.

"Come with me!"

This went on for awhile, as you used your magic to held rebuild and clean the area up, he followed you like a lost dog. Watching in awe and standing on some of the broken bits of wood you would raise in the air. He was starting to get on your nerves.

You pull the wooden plank towards you with Luffy on it. "Okay, what do you want?" He smiles widely at you as he has all day. "You're cool! I want you to join me. You'll love it." He giggled.

You scratch your neck before moving him away. He seemed nice, and he did help you get rid of the pirates. But he was also a pirate.

He stretched his arms and pulled himself towards you, crashing into you.

The two of you rolled before you landed a couple feet away. "Dude-" You grabbed at him and pulled his arm, which stretched. "Okay, that's a little weird."

"Pleaseeeee."

Deciding that he would probably not take no for an answer you decided to follow him to his ship. You could either get kidnapped, killed, or worse. You knew you had this in the bag though. "If you try anything I'm teleporting away."

He laughed in response as you somehow finally reached the boat. "Didn't we pass this like an hour ago.." He launched the two of you up into the center of the ship.

"Luffy! Why did you take off! You've been gone all day!" An orange haired girl scolded Luffy. A few others appeared and started complaining. "Who is this?" A blonde man appeared next to you with a rose.

"This is.. uh."

"Y/n."

After meeting everyone they seemed very weary of you. Luffy described what you could do and they looked hesitant. They haven't seen you in battle, but they don't doubt Luffy.

"She's our new crew member!"

"When did I agree to that!!?"

You bicker back and forth for a hot minute. This man acted like a child and it made you fume. You flicked your hand and hit him on the head with a rock. Not toooooo hard, and not like it would hurt him anyone. He fell down and laughed. "Look isn't that cool."

The others around you sweatdropped and were clearly on edge.

"H-hey guys.." The long nosed dude pointed to a ship that was nearing, quickly.

While still arguing with Luffy about joining, you flicked your wrist towards the ship. The ship erupted. Pieces of wood flying and people yelling and jumping overboard. The crew watched in awe

"You are a bad influence! I am not joining your crew!" He giggled at your reaction. You shake your head and turn around, heading to jump off of the ship. Acting like taking that ship down was nothing to you. "H-hey wait.. are you sure you don't want to join?" The girl from earlier had stopped you.

You narrow your eyes. Did you really want to join a pirate crew? You looked back and see a little reindeer chasing Luffy around. "You're hurt! Stop running around!" Your eyes dart to the side, seeing the blonde serve drinks to another lady.

"Ah fuck it."

EXTRA:

Over the past week of being aboard the Sunny. It was a new experience, and you hate to admit you enjoyed these pirates. They were... fun. You helped around the ship, soon they became your family. You helped Sanji and showed him new things, for cooking. You even entertained Usopp and Luffy with your magic.

You were beginning to like the pirate life.

#one piece fluff #one piece scenario #one piece headcanons #luffy #luffy x reader #monkey d. luffy #op #x reader #fluff #Straw hats #Nami #Zoro #Sanji #Robin #Chopper

[800tz]

LOVE BUZZED

━━━━━━━━━━

Pair: Jesus Christo x F reader

Fandom: Clone high

Warnings: None

Additional: N/N=nickname, H/S=hairstyle, the teacher name is just a random ass name i came up with, also Gandhi's back😝

═════════════════════

The day started off just as any normal Friday morning would, the halls busseling with the familiar faces of Vlad the Impaler and Napoleon, just the usual.

"Y/N! doesn't today seem like it's gonna be crazy? I mean nothing interesting has happened since the nip slip at the rally last week, somethings gotta be coming y'know?" Frida grabbed her skateboard, leaning against the locker next to yours.

"I don't know, I mean I can't really think of a reason for it to be a special day... Besides that Biology test, by the way, did you get it?"

You asked, refering to the answer key you asked her to steal for educational reasons.

"Of course I did, here" as she hands the answer key over, you slide her a piece of bubble gum, her favorite thing in the whole wide world besides her trusty skateboard.

You were walking to class with Frida slowly skating next to you, how days usually started, that was until an unusual interaction would start a chain of events...

"Heyyyy Y/N..so I know I still owe you that 5 dollars, and I promise I'm working on it! but I need a favor.." Gandhi appeared in front of you, out of nowhere, blocking your path.

rolling your eyes, you thought 'what more could he possibly need' he looked at you with his sad attempt at puppy dog eyes.

"What" you ask blankly, "Well, I need you to meet Joan in the bathroom..." he states. You noticed his nervous stance, he was visibly sweaty, tapping his pointer fingers together, avoiding eye contact.

"Ok, what tim-" immediately you were cut off by being shoved to the girls room "like right now" he blurts. Soon enough you were standing in a stall with Joan.

"Whats up" you asked tiredly, Joan didn't look half as nervous as Gandhi did, probably because she hasn't owed you $5 since the 6th grade.

"Ok, before you judge me, let me explain what happened first!" she says with wide eyes

"Basically, what happened was... "

FLASHBACK

━━━━━━━━━

"Did you hear about that party Catherine the Great's throwing" Gandhi whispered, Abe looked at him quickly, "No? She's throwing a party? When? Is Cleo gonna be there?!" he babbled.

"Probably, but I doubt she'd invite us... Unless we had a way in" Joan smiled to herself, "I have an idea" Joan said.

"Yeah! Last weeks trip was sooooo wild right Gandhi?" Joan exclaimed loudly, Gandhi looked at all the eyes on him and immediately hid himself behind some menus.

"Right Gandhi??" Joan pushed, "O-oh yeah, totally! What did we do? Acid was it?" he yelled, "What are you guys talking about? We didn't do anything last wee-ouch!" Joan kicked Abe in the shin from beneath the table.

"Yeah! Huh thank goodness I brought the stuff!" Joan continues. Now, more than a few eyes were on them, almost the whole diner was looking their direction.

"Oh yeah, I know TONS of dealers!" Joan exclaimed, Catherine looked at her with the biggest smile ever, "You do!?" she overheard Joan talking at the table behind her.

Catherine jumped into the booth next to Joan, "Yeah, I do, why? do you need anything?" asked Joan.

"Yeah I do actually! I don't know if you heard but I'm throwing this party next Friday, and it would be totally lame without something to spice it up" Catherine frowned

"But if you have something, you guys could totally come" she says with a smile, "YES! Yes! We can totally have some by next Friday!" Gandhi declares, while standing on the booth.

"Wait-" Joan could barely get a word out before Catherine interrupted her with a clap, "Cool! You guys are totally invited! Don't forget the stuff or else I'll be totally pissed, anyways, thanks! See you at the party!" Catherine swiftly grabbed her purse and exited the diner.

"Gandhi.... Why would you do that! How are we supposed to get that much weed by next Friday?!" Joan whisper yelled across the table. "Uhhh I don't know... You think she's into me?" he asks, smiling very widely.

"No Gandhi, she's not- never mind that! You realize the entire school is going to be at this party? There's no way we're gonna get it in time!" Joan sighs.

Gandhi gulps, realizing the gravity of is rash decision making, "W-well, I think I know someone"

END OF FLASHBACK

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"So yeah.. That's what happened" Joan sighed, you rubbed your face, the situation already stressing you out to the max

"And you waited till Friday morning to tell me?" you ask. "Well Gandhi wouldn't stop getting all scared to ask you! Just please help me out, I'll do your homework for the whole rest of the year if you do this ONE LITTLE thing for me!" Joan begs.

"I wish I could but I don't even smoke sooo I don't know why Gandhi would even tell you to ask me, I'm sorry but I wish I could-" Joan grabbed your shoulders tightly.

"What do you mean you don't smoke? You mean you know people who do right? Gandhi told me you were close friends with Jesus" Joan panicked.

"What? No I went to middle school with Jesus, but we weren't close, and no, I don't know anyone who does" you tell her.

"Ah! That's it! I'll go talk to Jesus! He'll have something!" she cheered. The more you thought about it, the more you just couldn't shake it, why on earth would Gandhi think you were close with Jesus?

"Hey Joan! Before you go, did Gandhi tell you why he thought Jesus and I were close?" Joan quickly gathered her things before heading out to class.

"He said he talks about you a lot or something, anyways thank you so much! I'll see you at the party tonight right?" she asks,"Yup" and just like that she was gone.

You sat down next to Frida, only a few minutes later than usual. "What was that all about?" Frida whispers over the monotone teacher's lecture.

"It's kind of a long story but basically, Catherine the Great is throwing a party tonight, and Gandhi told her he has a ton of weed that he could take to the party" you explain.

"Ok? So what does that have to do with you?" Frida asks, "Well, the problem is Gandhi doesn't have any weed, so he asked me if I had anything because... Because apparently he thought I was 'close' with Jesus" you say.

"Jesus Christo?" she looks at me shocked, "Yeah, isn't that weird? Joan said he talks about me a lot or something" you say.

"Huh weird, maybe he likes you!" Frida teases,"No way! Shut up" you giggle "Anyways, we're going to that party right?" Frida asks, "Oh for sure" you smile, fist bumping Frida.

"Kahlo, L/N, something you wanna share?" Mr Bonner asks, Frida only pops a bubble loudly in response. "Alrighty" Mr Bonner moves on quickly.

LUNCH TIME

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"Why did you tell me that she knew a guy?" Joan quizzed, Gandhi rubbed his head "Well it's not my fault! Jesus won't shut up about some girl in English! Maybe it wasn't her!" Gandhi sighed, "We're totally not gonna make it to that party huh" he whined.

"We will as soon as you go talk to Jesus-" Joan starts, Gandhi stands up triumphantly, "That's it! I'll go talk to Jesus!" he says, walking towards his table.

"Almost like that's what I just said" Joan sighs while putting a spoonful of peas into her mouth.

Jesus was sitting pretty deep into the cafeteria, with a group of other stoner kids, he was surprisingly sober. "Hey, can I talk to you... Alone" all the laughing stopped immediately.

"Of course homes, whats going on?" he asks with his usual fluid voice, ending up in the hallway together, Gandhi began to explain the circumstance he found himself in.

"You smoke weed right?" Gandhi awkwardly asks, "'Course I do homes"... "Well uh, I'm kind of in a tough spot.. You see I kinda...overestimated... And I’m gonna need some- a lot of weed actually, I can pay you! I just- please man" Gandhi explains.

Jesus hums to himself, "oohhh I see, you promised someone a lot of stuff but then you actually didn't have anything but you need it cuz if you don't they'll get all angry? I been there before homes I been there" he says.

"So you'll help me?! Thanks man! You have no idea-" Gandhi's cheers were quickly interrupted, "Ehh I would, tch but I'm fresh out homes, and my plugs outta town" Jesus shrugs.

"Dude! Are you serious right now?!" Gandhi whines, "Stone cold homes" Jesus says bluntly, Gandhi whines loudly.

Jesus laughs loudly, "Haha! You shoulda seen your face homes! You were all like uuughhhhhh!" he laughs. "Wait so you were joking?" Gandhi looks up at him with hopeful eyes.

"Of course man, but I'll only help you on one condition ey" Gandhi looks at him, he would do absolutely anything to get laid at this point, "Whatever it is, I'll do it just tell me who I have to kill-"

"Woah relax, take a hit! You say you'll do anything ey?" Jesus holds out his pinky finger, "Anything" Gandhi pinky promises.

"That was a pinky promise homes, that means it's sacred ey, if you break it, something bad will happen, something very very bad" he puts his arm around Gandhi.

Gandhi gulps, "Of course man!" he says nervously, having absolutely no idea what he's getting himself into.

"Alright alright, I want you to set me up with that one super hot chick with the H/S, Y/N, man I had my eye on her since middle school homes, I just been too scared to talk to her and you pinky promised so now you have to homes" Jesus smiled

Gandhi was relieved it wasn't something as bad as he thought it would be, but don't get him twisted it was still a very difficult feat.

"Y/N?" Gandhi asks, Jesus pulls his wallet out, he fumbled with it for a moment before unfolding a yearbook page, he slid his finger down the page before reaching her picture.

The yearbook page had been from years before, it was a middle school picture of you, braces gleaming embarrassingly bright, almost popping off the page.

"Ooohh Y/N?! You have a crush on Y/N!?-" Jesus put his hand over Gandhi's Mouth almost immediately, "Shhh ey be quiet homes! Not so loud!" Jesus said.

Gandhi nodded, "ooooohhh I got you man! Your secrets safe with me! You won't regret it!" Gandhi led Jesus out the back door of the school, not to be seen by a single soul.

END OF SCHOOL DAY

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"Do you wanna come over?" you ask Frida, "Nah, I'll skate home today, see you at the party" Frida says her goodbyes before skating away.

Who wouldn't be excited for a party, today was the best day ever!

Oops, spoke too soon...

"Aw come on! Are you kidding me!" the tires were slashed, absolutely demolished, "Well it looks like I'll be getting a ride... Hey Joan! Can I ride with you! My tires are slashed!" you yelled over to the red headed girl.

"Sure, hop in" she says, you hopped into the passenger seat feeling lucky that you wouldn't have to walk home.

The ride to your house was quiet because you couldn't quiet get Jesus off of your mind, you've only spoken like once, what if he really did have a crush on you? I mean why though? you don't know each other at all! Whatever, it's basically the weekend, you should be focusing on yourself right now, yeah!

As Joan pulled up to your house, you thanked her and walked towards the door, thankfully your foster parents were on vacation so you were free to party!

When you check your backpack for your house keys, it's almost like over night you became the most unlucky person on earth because of course your keys were missing!

"For fucks sake" you mumbled to yourself, walking over to Joan's car and stepping back in, "Welp looks like I'm locked out" you smiled to her, "Its cool, now we can get ready for Catherines party together!" you smiled at each other as you drove to Joan’s house.

JOANS HOUSE

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It was almost time for the party, you had put on some makeup, but you couldn't really eat anything because you still couldn't stop thinking about Jesus, what was going on?

"Ugh" Joan grunts next to you, looking at her flip phone with a stressed out expression. "What is it? Did you get the whole weed situation figured out?" you ask

"Yup! Everythings fine! Totally fine I promise!" Joans reaction weren't exactly what you wanted to hear, but it was enough for you not to worry too much.

The minutes ticked by quickly, soon enough you were in Joan’s car listening to the plans for who you were picking up.

"Ok so we're gonna drive to Gandhi's house, park there, pick up his van, and then we're picking up Abe and Jesus. Gandhi said we were taking a quick pitstop somewhere but he didn't say where" Joan explains.

You didn't think before you spoke "Wait Jesus is coming with us?" you blurt out. Joan looked at you confused, "Yeah, is something wrong?" she asked.

"No, nothing, also whats that pitstop? He didn't say anything about it?" you asked, as Joan put the car in drive, she looked at you and smiled, "Nope!"

Soon enough you were in a sticky van with Abe, Joan, Ghandi and Jesus. "Ok so where is this pitstop? You said it was on the way" Joan says.

Jesus leaned over the passenger seat from the back, pointing towards street ahead, "Just keep going this way homes, I'll tell you when to stop" the car was mostly silent other than Abe and Ghandi talking about all the girls they would bang at the party.

"Eyy how have you been Y/N, I haven't seen you since the 8th grade homes, how's it going" Jesus was sprawled across the van from me, picking the shag carpet lightly.

You're eyes widened suddenly at the sudden sound of your name "Well I've been alright, how about you" I replied shyly, Jesus sighs "Nothing much..." he trails off, still picking the carpet.

"I see you grew out that catfish stash" you joke, "Eyy don't trash Jesus Junior" he laughed while combing his goatee.

"Ey you remember when that one guy with the bug eyes threw up in gym and the teacher got all angry cuz he was throwing up everywhere and then bug eyed kid threw up on the teacher?" he giggles

"Kinda, wasn't that Tommy G?" you thought, "Yeah! Oh man, I'll never forget the look on your face, you were all like" Jesus widened his eyes an made an over exaggerated shocked expression with his mouth.

"I did not look like that!" you pushed his shoulder slightly, "Eh I think you did N/N" he pokes. N/N?...N/N, he gave you a nickname, and you actually liked it.

Jesus wasn't as serious as you thought he'd be, he looks a little intimidating from the outside, but now that you'd talked talked to him he was actually really cool!

"Ey stop right there homes" Jesus leaned over the passenger seat, Joan stopped the car quickly. "That's his place, we gotta break in there and get the stuff" Jesus says calmly.

"Break in?! I thought you said you were joking!" Ghandi panicks, "I lied, sorry about that, but ey relax it'll be easy, we'll need someone to distract the guard dog while I sneak in and get it" Jesus explains.

It was about 9 o'clock at night, the neighborhood was very sketchy, definitely not the best place for a group of teenagers to be.

After a lot of yelling and "not its" Gandhi spoke up, "I'll go" he sighs, everyone looked at him shocked "I'm the one who got us into this, and I'm gonna get us to that party or die trying!" he declares.

"Gandhi.." Joan whispers, Jesus smiles, "Great, lets go". Gandhi and Jesus stepped out of the van, sneaking over to the side of the house.

"Ok, I'm gonna put you over the fence and then I'm gonna go in through the window and let the dog out, you have to keep him busy for about 5 minutes homes, you think you can do that?" Jesus explained the plan to him.

Gandhi high fived Jesus and nodded. I watched from the window as Gandhi hopped onto Jesus's shoulders dropping into the backyard.

Jesus snuck in through an open window, the big dog barked loudly at Gandhi outside of the screen door, Jesus opened it and from the van all we heard was...

"Ahh!!! Good boy! Ouch come on hurry up man!" Gandhi was running in circles away from the angry dog.

A few minutes of loud barking was interrupted by Jesus jumping over the fence with a half naked Gandhi.

They jumped into the van almost so fast that you didn't see them, "GO! GO DRIVE JOAN HURRY!" Gandhi yelled.

The van sped off, throwing you and Gandhi onto Jesus, you looked up at him, he smiled widely, not in a creepy way but in more of an 'it's cool' sorta way.

The car gradually slowed down, "Did you get it" Gandhi huffs, Jesus reaches into his jacket, pulling out a big bag of weed, "I got rolling paper too, N/N's gonna help me roll them!" he puts his arm around me in a friendly way.

There I was, in the back of a van rolling blunts with Jesus and a mostly naked Gandhi.

As soon as we arrived at the party, everyone nearly went feral at the sight of a blunt, everyone plunged their gross teenage hands into the bag, by the time everyone was satisfied there was only one left.

"Ey N/N, wanna hit this with me?" Jesus offers, you had never smoked before...but you wanted to seem cool to him right now so you swallowed your fear and went for it.

"Sure" Jesus smiled, pulling out his lighter and lead you out of the house, "I've got a perfect spot, check this out homes" Jesus grins

"Ey Gandhi, hold onto this for me, thanks man" Jesus tossed Gandhi his flip phone. Gandhi gave Jesus a thumbs up and a smile, Jesus copied him and continued on his journey.

TIMESKIP

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The party was a full on hit, almost everyone at school was here, on the dance floor was Gandhi, still only in his boxers and socks, but that didn't matter now! It was party time!

'BZZZZT! BZZZZT!'

Jesus's phone buzzed in Gandhis sweaty boxers, causing him to forget that it wasn't his phone "Hey! Wuzzzaaapp!!!" he slurs into the speaker.

"Ey wussup homie, yo check this, I'm heading home in a few, I gotta new stash of some real crazy shiz, herbal blend type shit, anways, you should stop by homes I'll be at the crib in a few" the voice on the other line spoke.

Gandhi's heart dropped for the millionth time that night, "T-totally, ey I gotta go bye" he hung up quickly, saving his ass in the process.

Gandhi shoved his way through the crowd to the kitchen where he found Joan downing a can of beer, "uh Joan?" Gandhi yells over the music.

"Heyy, hows it goin~ do you think I should dye my hair blue??? Or is it just me-you know I feel great right now-" Joan immediately lurched over the sink and puked herself sober

"Joan! We have a serious problem!" Gandhi yells, Joan wearily lifts her head up, "What is it this time" she asks.

"Well uh, Jesus's plug is coming back... Tonight.... Right now.." He explains, Joan looked at him with wide eyes, "oh my god! Were gonna go to jail for breaking and entering! We're criminals Gandhi! Filthy! Dirty criminals!" Joan cries.

Gandhi thinks for a second, "Well not if we put it all back!" he proposes, Joan furrowed her brows "Lets go!" she drags Gandhi by his shoulder back to the van.

"What about Jesus and Y/N?! We can't just leave the-" Joan put her finger up to Gandhi's lips, "There's no time! We gotta hurry! Hop in the back and start putting the little crumbs into the bag-"

As Joan pulled the van doors open widely, a shocking scene appeared, you were only in your bra and bottoms, you're shirt thrown off to the side lazily, along with Jesus's jacket. You were placed on his lap, him holding himself up on his elbows.

Joan looked at the two of you with wide eyes, "Eyy up top!" Gandhi holds his hand up expectingly, only to be shoved into the van.

As the car sped off, you swiftly grabbed your shirt and tried your best to fan the herbal mist out the window. "Sooo did you guys go.....all the way?" Gandhi asks with a perverted grin.

You thought back at the moments before they arrived, your adrenaline still pumping from the excitement of doing something you weren't supposed to.

FLASHBACK

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Jesus led you back out to Gandhi's van. He opened the back doors for you, letting you in first then soon hopping in behind. "Ey we can hotbox" he smiles.

You were quite nervous, this being one of the rare occasions of you being alone with a boy. "Ey have you ever done this before? You look hella nervous" Jesus says while preparing to flick the lighter

"What are you talking about? I-I do this all the time" you lie, he looks at you blankly for a moment, "Kidding.. " you cringe at yourself, why would you say that, like why?

Jesus lights the joint, the herbal smell already filling the vehicle, he takes a long, beep breath in, sighing happily when he's finished.

"Here" he hands the joint to you, you take it cautiously, not really knowing what to do. Building your courage up, you slowly drew the joint closer to your lips, 'don't embarrass yourself'

"HACK HACK!" as soon as you tried to take a deep breath in, violent coughs errupted from your throat, this could't possibly get any worse

"Woah, you alright?" he pats your back gently, "no" you strain. Jesus sits you up gently, taking the joint from your hands he smiles.

"Tch, no need to be embarrassed, it happens to everyone" he grins. You tried your best to not run out of the van and into oncoming traffic.

"Ey how about we shotgun" he suggests, you look at him curiously, what the hell is shotgunning? You just looked at him blankly.

"Come here" he says gently, you sat uncomfortably close to him face to face, your cheeks getting warmer by the second.

You watched as he placed the joint between his soft lips, you couldn't help but look into his deep black eyes, wondering what kind of person layed behind them, just out of your reach.

He as he breathed in, crazy thoughts ran through your mind, you thought about kissing him....With tongue!

He came a little bit closer and blew the smoke into your face, you breathed it in, the task now feeling a lot easier.

"Tch see, I knew you could do it" he jokes, you laugh a little causing you to cough lightly. "Wanna try again?" he grins expectantly.

You thought about it, even if you guys did make out, it probably wouldn't turn into anything, but that might be a better reason to do it! But it's just all so confusing!

"Sure" you smile as he came closer. Nothing could stop you now, you would have his tongue in your mouth by the end of the night, even if it killed you!

Just like before, he dragged the smoke into his mouth, then he blew the smoke into your face, getting just a little bit closer than last time.

You couldn't tell if it was the marijuana, or if it was some newly grown balls, but you knew that the next shotgun, you would kiss him.

And sure enough when he came close, and blew the smoke into your face, you pressed your lips gently onto his, moving your lips gently on his.

The joint was long forgotten by the time you held onto his jacket, pulling his lips closer. It felt liberating! You pulled away, his face was slightly red, his hat and halo shitfed slightly.

His eyes were glued to you, he couldn't believe this was happening, Y/N L/N was making out with him in a van outside of Catherine the Greats house!

He leaned up, not wanting this moment to end, he kissed you passionately, holding your cheeks softly, he couldn't get enough of you.

The two of you ended up on the floor, you on top of him. He held onto your hips as you removed your shirt revealing your lacy bra. Jesus's eyes widened, you felt something unfamiliarly hard beneath your crotch, but you and I both know what that was.

He sat himself on his elbows, watching as you unbuttoned his jacket tantalisingly slow. With each button, you kissed him.

He lifted his hand up to move some stray pieces of hair out of your face, that's when the van doors suddenly opened. "Ah!" you yelped, Jesus only looked at the figures with a shocked expression.

The figures turned out to be Gandhi and Joan. Joan looked at the two of you with disgust, while Gandhi grined widely "Eyy! Up top!" he puts his hand up expectingly, only to be shoved into the back by Joan.

END OF FLASHBACK

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"What with the rush homes?" Jesus questions, Gandhi fills the two of you in on the situation, you not being able to focus too well thanks to the events that occured prior.

"Where are we supposed to get all of that? Is he gonna kill us? This is totally freaking me out!" Joan panicks. The car swerves wildly throughout the city, both Gandhi and Joan screaming with fear.

This situation had sobered you slightly, you thought carefully about what you could do to fix the situation, you thought a little bit but then you remembered!

"STOP THE CAR!" you yelled, the whole car went silent at the sound of your loud voice. Joan pulled over cautiously, as soon as the car came to a halt, everyone looked back at you expectantly.

"I have an idea"

TIMESKIP

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There you Jesus, Joan, and Gandhi were in all black, ski masks keeping your identities a secret. The four of you stood outside of the hospital, "If I'm correct, theres medical marijuana in there, and I know it might not be the same thing but its our last hope" you sigh.

All four of you walked up to the window, you held Gandhi up to the window, "Remember, try to be stealthy!" you whisper, he nods, holding his hand like a gun, "agent tan incoming" he says

That's when he dove through the window, shattering it loudly, the three of you left outside cringed, but it was too late to chicken out.

Jesus lifted you up into the window, next was Joan, then finally you and Joan pulled Jesus up. Gandhi stood there against the wall, holding his hands like guns, "I told you to be quiet! Theres security here!" you scold.

Gandhi keeps his mouth shut, still playing into his stoic agent act." alright, my foster mom works here, she talks about the stash all the time, it should be on the third floor" you say.

The four of you tiptoed through the hospital, trying your best not to be caught by staff or patients, but it was getting pretty hard since Gandhi was apparently addicted to acting stupid.

Once you made it to the third floor, you took a bag each, jackpot! You all quietly celebrated, thats when you heard keys jingling at the door.

You, Joan and Jesus all dove behind some shelves, Gandhi stood in front of the door. The door opened revealing a tall muscular man in a security guard outfit.

"Stop right there! You have the right to remain tan!" Gandhi shouts while diving out the window, you face palmed. But it wasn't the time for shenanigans, it was now or never.

The three of you ran for it, exiting the hospital swiftly, on your way out you found Gandhi hanging on a tree branch, you grabbed him and ran to the van, making a swift getaway!

As soon as you guys made it to calm ground, you all took a big breath of relief, but there was still one last thing to do.

As Joan drove towards the drug dealers home, a calming silence fell amongst you. You sat next to Jesus, leaning your head on his shoulder.

He tapped you on your leg, you looked into his eyes, "When this is all over, wanna hangout sometime?" he asks shyly, you smile "sure" you whisper.

Closing your eyes gently for just a moment to collect your mind. Unbeknownst to you, Gandhi gave Jesus a thumbs up, Jesus doing the same.

Once the car parked, Joan looked back "Jesus, this is it, don't fail us now" she says seriously, he just nods and heads off into the home through the window.

You all waited with anticipation, watching silently. Thats when a red car suddenly pulled up, it was the dealer! You started to sweat, what if he got caught? Or worse...shot?

You could tell that Gandhi and Joan were thinking the same thoughts, thats when suddenly, out of the shadows, Jesus came rushing out from behind the home!

He hopped into the van with all of us cheering for our victory, "Drive!" we all yelled.

We ended up at The Grassy Knoll, parked in the parking lot enjoying our shakes and fries.

"That was crazy! Did you guys see how I dove out of that window! I was so badass! I was like 'shing! bam! Kapow!' stop right there" he says the last part with an over exaggerated deep voice.

We all laughed at his interpretation of the situation, we all sat watching the sun rise together peacefully.

"Wait, wheres Abe?" Gandhi pipes up.

MEANWHILE

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"Where am I?" a disgruntled Abraham Lincoln asks. He was fully naked on a pool floaty, beer cans surrounding him in the water.

"Joan? Y/N?! GANDHI?!"

THE END

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#clone high #jesus cristo #clone high gandhi #clone high joan #clone high abe #fanfic #total drama x reader #Jesus Christo x YN

[ryuichirou]

More Crewel/Trein hcs

Anonymous asked:

OMG CREWELLLLLLLLLLLL! He looks as stunning as always. Quite down Devious if he's grabbing all of those condoms. I wonder who are they for?~ But that just reminded me that Trein and Crewel are a thing- Sooooo.... Trein x Crewel headcanons please?

Anonymous asked:

Any new thoughts on Crewel x Trein?  The staff need more love.  Except Vargas.

So uhhh sorry for the late reply, guys!

I thought it would be a quick one, because to be honest I don’t really have many new things to say about the two, especially because we don’t really see them often and don’t know much about them. But as I started writing, this happened.

I thought the post would be mostly wholesome but still ended up writing something horny. It isn’t that bad though, should’ve been more cursed to be honest.

Back when Crewel was a student, he saw a picture of younger Trein in a school photo album at NRC library. His initial reaction was to show it to everyone, but something stopped him, so he never did. For some reason, he felt very possessive and jealous over that newfound knowledge, even though the fact that Trein was young once isn’t really a secret lol He cringes when he thinks about it now. But he still comes to the library to look at it every once in a while. And thinks that Trein seemed like a bore even when he was Crewel’s age lol

Crewel was super happy when Trein let him to look after Lucius while he was gone (during the Masquerade event). When Trein mentioned that he was worried about Lucius because he couldn’t bring him for the trip, Crewel replied with “I can take care of him” so quickly that it was almost embarrassing. He himself wasn’t even sure why he was so eager to take the cat home, considering that he wasn’t even a cat person. This is why he made all those teasing jokes about how he was going to make Lucius learn all kinds of dog tricks – it was mostly him trying to make Trein remember that he was still annoying as fuck and wasn’t helping him out just to be nice.

Sam knows what’s up between them, mostly because Crewel chats with him every time he buys cigarettes and other stuff at his store. Crewel doesn’t lament about his conflicting feelings, but he does complain about Trein a lot, and Sam knows how to read people, so at this point this is Sam’s personal irl dorama lol Vargas wouldn’t know that something is going on even if he saw it with his own eyes, and Crowley… who knows?

Despite being seemingly naive and oblivious, Trein is aware that Crewel thinks that he is vanilla. Trein doesn’t think he is vanilla (in fact, he considers this term quite ridiculous), he just thinks he is classy + an old man. But it does tickle him when Crewel gets frustrated with him, so sometimes he even teases him by making it seem like he doesn’t understand what Crewel is talking about. Trein isn’t nearly as naïve as Crewel thinks he is, so he really enjoys it when Crewel is fuming but can’t explain why. This boy is such a child sometimes….

The first time Crewel kissed Trein was during some kind of after party for teachers after the school event. Vargas and Sam went to get more drinks, Crowley also wasn’t there (remember when they didn’t invite him? lol), so Crewel just sat closer to Trein, flirted with him and then just went for it. Maybe it was the alcohol, but Trein was kind of teasing him back, but he still didn’t realise that they would end up kissing.

Trein kind of thought that it wasn’t that serious, and that Crewel would finally calm down after that, in a “whatever happened back then doesn’t matter” way. But the opposite happened because Crewel started flirting with Trein more openly and aggressively after that, asking him personal questions, leaning and touching, acting like a predator at times. The mature thing to do for Trein would be to scold Crewel and set strong boundaries, but for some reason he didn’t… isn’t he just too lenient with this boy?

When that started happening, it was Trein’s turn to be conflicted, because Crewel suddenly got super determined, as if that one sloppy kiss made it super clear that he wants to fuck Trein. So it became his active mission all of a sudden, resulting in a lot of “by the way, when was the last time you had sex, Trein-sensei?” and “did you know that students used to make out on your desk when I myself was a student? I was one of these people”. These questions annoy and embarrass Trein, but he tries to stay calm… while obviously blushing.

Things very quickly turned pretty physical with them, basically Crewel just started catching Trein, hugging him, touching him, groping him sometimes; whenever they are alone, he’s going to cling and put his hands under Trein’s robes. He likes to touch his waist and hips, and a lot of times this is enough to leave poor Trein red and panting, but he does touch his private parts as well. And then at some point Crewel would start humping against his hips, and things would get so scarily close to them having sex at school, that Trein would push him away and avoid him for a couple of days.

Trein was refusing to have sex with Crewel for like a month or so, but then his strict “no” turned into “not in school”. Which prompted Crewel to invite him to his place or a hotel (preferable), but Trein refused… so, in school it is then. At the library. The same one where Crewel found that one picture all those years ago. But this time it’s not him looking at an old picture longingly, this time it’s him fucking the man from that picture on the desk. And the man biting his glove fiercely not to make any sound. He really hates how much he loves it.

Remember when Crewel thought that he would be free after having sex with Trein? Jokes on him, because now he is fully obsessed and thinks just how much bdsm Trein’s body could handle. He’ll definitely make him wear a collar now that he knows that Trein is going to complain, but ultimately do whatever he asks him to do. Even if it means that Trein is going to tease him afterwards for being a kid and playing with toys. 

#replies #headcanons #crewtrein

[giggly-squiggily]

I’m starting a tag game so hAh take that >:D

Anyways it’s time for some self love sooooo

List your top 3 favorite works (art fics whatever u want)

AND WHY :D gotta make sure to do the why👹no self deprivation here🕺

Feel free to rope anybody else into this chain we gotta self lovo 🤸‍♀️

GHOST! This is so cool oh my goodness! Let's make a chain! >:D

1.) Operation WereTiger: BackFired!: One of my favorite works for Bungo Stray Dogs! It combines all my favorite things: Lee!Dazai, Atsushi's paw hands, collaborating with friends, and absolute mayhem! Nym (@intheticklecloset) is a fabulous writer- and getting an opportunity to collab and befriend her makes this fic extra special in my book ^w^

2.) Girls Night: I adored writing this fic ajlkjarkjeajkrakj It's not often I get the chance to write Shinobu and Mitsuri's friendship, nor do I get the chance much to write something so Muichiro-centric. This fic covered both! :D Getting to write these three having a sleepover and bonding brought me so much joy alejkrakjrekj I just love writing sleepover fics!

3.) Phone Chaos: Lookie, it's our collab! :D I love collabs, can't y'all tell? Alongside that- Spy x Family is one of my favorite anime/manga! The characters are hilariously cute, the story is funny and intense, and I adore these two as a couple so much. Also writing Yor with her face covered in chocolate to go alongside your art with her covered in chocolate is beyond funny alkjrkeakraekrjk

No pressure tags: @rachi-roo, @gladdygirl18, @tklpilled @danibby @otomiya-tickles, @duckymcdoorknob @myreygn @ticklish-n-stuff @intheticklecloset @skribblz @helloitsghost (That's right- I'm tagging you too :P) + Whomever reads this and wants to play! :D

#squiggily plays #ask game #top threes #fanfics #fluff #helloitsghost #ghost :3 #friend :3 #new game let's gooooo!

[fuck-customers]

I work at a veterinary clinic and we do boarding for dogs/cats. Today an owner came to pick up her 5 month old german shepherd puppy. If an owner leaves a leash and/or harness with us, we always try to use them to take them out to the lobby, rather than using one of our slip leads. This puppy came with a harness and a leash, and was wearing his collar. He was much too fucking excited for me to put his harness on by myself, and it was a busy hour so I didn’t have anyone to ask to help keep him steady for me. So I said fuck it and hooked his leash to his collar and carried his harness out with me to the owner. I had this thought, “This better not be one of those owners that’s weird about this kind of thing,” but well, unless it’s a small dog (harnesses are always better for small dogs) or a dog with certain special needs, it doesn’t fucking matter, especially if you’re just going to be taking them right to the car. Well when I took this puppy out to this lady, I almost wasn’t sure she was his owner. He was tugging toward her but lots of puppies will do that to anyone. The face she was making was confused and annoyed. I said, “Hi! Is this your baby?” and she said, “Yes. But why isn’t his harness on?” Of fucking course. I explained to her it wasn’t possible for me to put it on him, he was just sooooo excited to get to see her again. Then I offered to help her put it on, and he was still bouncing off the walls excited and she wasn’t listening to what I was telling her to do. She finally started to leave and snapped, “It’s fine, he’ll just choke himself to death on the way to the car.” Yeah sure okay. A five month old large dog puppy is going to die in the thirty or less seconds it takes you to get him to your car. Whatever, bitch, you’re welcome we took care of him while he spilled his food and water constantly. (Nothing actually against the puppy, he was a sweet boy, but people seriously don’t realize the stuff we have to put up with.)

Posted by admin Rodney.

[cara-carabowditbowdit]

please tell me more about crowley and aziraphale im Very interested /srs

ok so. this is gonna be a looong post sorry

BASICALLY. aziraphale is an angel, crowley is a demon. theyve known each other for 6,000 years, at the creation of the universe (when crowley was still an angel. he created stars and everything. very nice job) and theyve become great... friends (wink) even though theyre not supposed to be! so theyre not friends! theyre eeeevil enemies. and then they go out for dinner

anyways. idk how to explain it well but theyre just SOOOOO!!

ok so now im going to try and do like. a whole thing explaining everything below so SPOILERS!!!!

okay so. in the beginning aziraphale and crowley were both angels. they met when crowley was making stars and galaxies and all that pretty stuff, and aziraphale came to say that they were going to shut it down after a bit. crowley gets upset and goes whaaaa this is so cool why would they do that (lil thing to note. aziraphale is like. interested in crowley but he doesnt really care) and then they have some really nice scene

d'aww. ok and so THEN! some big war happens i think? i dont know they dont show that part and crowley falls. demon moment!!! and then they go through all these different decades being friends, getting to know each other, and its great. aziraphale sins a little bit (gluttony), crowley saves aziraphales books, and they all have fun. oh btw. crowley can transform into a snake, and apparently hes the one that caused adam and eve to eat the apple? BUT! theres this other great scene where theyre talking, and its revealed that aziraphale gave his flaming sword to adam and eve, showing that he loves humans and has a soft spot for them, and theres this other great shot

THE PARALLELS!!!!!!!!! AUUUGh (^ this one came before. btw) and so this is sort of them showing how ohh, theyre not supposed to hang out because angel good demon evil waaah but they just KEEP ON FINDING EACH OTHER. oh and. speaking of like. showing off different softer sides of them. in season 2, theres a lot of bits where they show that crowley is pretty much putting up this show of being so meaaan and eeevil but hes actually nice and cares about humans (bringing jobs kids back, keeping that girl from dying, etc). ok now onto talking about season one. warning i havent watched this season in a bit so this is just me going off memory.

ok so! the big issue this season is "oh noooo we lost the antichrist!! big bad things gonna happen" and its awesome. OK SO. it starts off with crowley delivering the antichrist to this satanist church? and theres two women having babies that night. ONE is a normal family, who are supposed to have a normal baby. THE OTHER ONE is a rich family who is supposed to have the EEEVIL baby. can u guess what happens. BABY SWITCH!!! they didnt realize it tho so crowley and aziraphale are sent after the wrong baby. (to make him sin/be good) and then they realize on his 11th? birthday "aw crud! wrong baby." and go on some search to find the right antichrist. and that brings us to ADAM!!! hes the antichrist, and one coooooool kid. hes pretty normal tho and just hangs out with his friends. and then one day on his 11th birthday this dog shows up! (hellhound) and then off on the side theres this witch lady named anathema device who has a book that knows the future. crazy stuff. oh and this guy names newt whos kinda a dork and talks to this weird witch hunter guy shadwell and his neighbor madame tracy. oh and the four horseman of the apocalypse are around and free OKAY. into it now. anthma knows something bad is going to happen (book), and she moves to london because thats where its gonna happen!! whaaaat!!! and newt moves to london because uhh. witch finder i think? and he goes to meet shadwell and accidently meets tracy. not important rn. shadwells kinda bonkers and freaks newt out. ok now onto anathema. im pretty sure that aziraphale and crowley were driving around (oh btw. he has a magic bentley) and hit her!! yeoch. and after driving her home she accidentally leaves her book in the bentley and aww they gotta meet up again aw shucks. okay now they go searching for adam (antichrist) and i dont think they find him? anyways i forgot how but then tracy shadwell newt and anathema all meet up with crowley and aziraphale and do a seance. i forgot what about but ohh nooo aziraphale is in madame tracys body!!! ok so i kinda forgot how again but somehow theyre all at some big area and the four horsemen and running around i forgot what theyre doing and BLAM ADAM SHOWS UP hes mad. hes trapped his friends into doing what he wants. hes gonna start the apocalypse. average 11 yr old stuff. BUT!!! crowley and aziraphale manage to calm him down and newt blows something up. idk whats going on anymore. satan comes out, "grrrah im ur father adam". its a nice lovely moment. but oh wait!!! gabriel (heavens big man) and beezelbub (hells high duke) come down/up and r like "yall r in biiiig trouble! cant be doin all this" and they try to kill both of them. aziraphale in hellfire, crowley in holy water. that scene comes and yoo wait theyre both alive??? this is insane!!!! theyre both MILKING it, bein dramatic and then. at the end. WHAOOOAH THEYRE ACTUALLY THE OTHER ONE?????

and thats the end of season one. okay so i know that this is incredibly long but im not even done. im going to reblog this later with me talking about season two and that should be shorter. OH BTW

thats what everyone looks like ^^

OKAY BYE!!!!!!

#this might be the longest post ive ever made #AND IM NOT EVEN DONE #second season should be more accurate cuz ive watched it recently tho #thanks for the ask tho!! this was fun #good omens #gomens #crowley #aziraphale #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman

[shalikneez]

fourth wing thoughts (no spoilers):

while reading:

- MIRA IS HOT she reminds me of totk zelda

- xaden scares me lowk

- why is xaden so mf big. HUH?! enormous ginamanasaurus motherfucker. in my head he’s 5 foot 10 inches and sleeper bod. next question

- i know rhiannon is sexy. need more of her!

- omg chronic illness mc YES

- violet is so cool lowk like acknowledges her weaknesses ✅ improves herself ✅ isn’t annoying ✅ isn’t a bitch unless ur a bitch to her first ✅ smart as fuck ✅

- bitchass jack barlowe reminds me of nacho cheese doritos.

- dain more like DAMN why don’t u shut the hell up 🤣

- dain is so protective savior complex core like bro has no faith in her aaaahdhdh honestly i would have snapped sooner because like why is he always talking like she’s a child and needs to be saved

- xaden on the other hand is always hyping her up. which is great but occasionally he goes over the top imo . we get it ur down bad my guy

- she’s sooooo silly calling xaden out in public all the time

- so happy dain x violet romance didn’t last. he reminds me of chaol from throne of glass

- ngl thought violet was gonna be the whiny shy useless mc but the whole book up to 60% is all about her getting stronger and cooler and hotter and she’s confident and figures her shit out without complaining

- i loooove her and her sibling’s relationship. it’s so real ngl. book of brennan is so cute. brennan and mira, and mira and violet. i love them.

- violets armor from mira is so cool ik she looks hot in it. fan art better slay

- NAOLIN MENTIONED ‼️‼️

- if she says “rippling muscle” or “he’s so beautiful” one more fucking time—expand ur vocabulary girl 😩

- dain bruh stfuuuuu bro is so annoying he probs looks like this 🤓

- so many cliches but all the cool world building and shit balances it out so well like i don’t even mind that much

- yeah she’s gonna get a special dragon obvi

- i was right 🤭

- dragon descriptions make me 😁😁😁 it’s so httyd and so much detail and care put into it i love it

- dragon world building is so 💗💗

- tairn the dragon u are so cool to me

- i want a dragon

- i miss mira

- xaden is so cool. reminds me of a wolf

- TAIRN IS SO UNSERIOUS 🤣🤣 sarcastic ass dragon

- MATES LMAOOOO so sarah j maas coded

- LIAM IS SOOOO CUTE so puppy dog :) sawyer too

- oh the telepathic connections. it’s so sjm up in here

- telepathy aspect is cool tho i like how this author writes it <3

- why r the dragons getting hot and heavy 🥵 🤨

- omg kisss!

- MIRA OMYGOD I LOVE U I MISSED U SO MUCH MY WARRIOR QUEEN

- ngl around 70% it’s not as entertaining as all the deathly challenges and trials from the beginning

- omg violets power 😮 im a slut for opposite aesthetics

- oh. not a fan of the monster dick sex. uncomfy lowk. good for them though 👍

- ok politics. i don’t care that much.

- OKAY CLICHE DIALOGUE I SEE YOU it’s so weird i’m not even that bothered by it when normally i would be

- this is becoming more romance than death-defying war college stuff :/

- lovers quarrel. lovers share trauma. then lovers make up. idgaf!

- me when the romance book is romancing 😐

- basic adult romance dialogue! welcome back. how are you today

- more monster dick sex. how lovely.

- xaden’s muscles keep rippling. bro stay still!

- man what kinda sex is rebecca yarros having 🧐👁️

- omg plot

- omg TENSION! BETRAYAL! TWISTS!

- oh the climactic end-of-book battle. ngl none of these details are processing in my head. what fight?

- i know someone had to die but why that particular person. man :(

- i’m sure this battle and strategy and action scenes are so slay. i’m dissociating tho lol

- aw xaden likes her so much. simp

- CLIFFHANGER 😮

overall: i liked the first half better than the second half. first 50% was soooo addicting. i loved the world building and dragons and war college and challenges so much but i’m just not a huge romance person. like the romantic buildup is amazing but afterwards i’m just meh. of course there was the expected tropey/ cliche/ booktok moments BUT most of it was overshadowed by how great the other aspects of the writing was. i dissociated at the end and didn’t really feel attached to violet or xaden or even the dragons (this is a me problem) but i think the ending is great set up for book 2 (will probs give it a read). like u can tell where the book is going but then the author does something unique to make it a little different than other books in this genre, so idk how many surprises book 2 will have. the fact that i read this is in less than 24 hours says a lot though. i hope mira comes back :D

#fourth wing #violet sorrengail #xaden riorson #violet and xaden #rebecca yarros #the empyrean #xadenviolet #tairneanach

[rocketrouquine]

Random thoughts on my second viewing of episode 2 :

The « you wear fine things well » replay : Taika hasn’t the same expression, when I tell you this is a different take, I’ll bet my script supervisor ass on it. If they did that, it’s for underlining the fact that they weren’t seeing the same thing in the relationship…

Stede, my sweet angel… maybe don’t tell everyone you meet (even your lovely towel collegues Maggie, Jane and Tiff) about your heart trouble with fucking Blackbeard.

The way he’s saying « they draw him to look like a ghoul » is so sooooo gay. Like disgusted sassy sista level.

Fuck you that’s how I am may or may not become a motto of mine.

Actually this whole scene, Lucius is in a fucking telenovela. The stop in the doorframe, talking across your shoulder without turning and the little disappointed head nod at the end. « oh, yeah. Now you care ? » (it just missed an hairflip) He came to ham and I’m here for it.

Sea witch again. I mean we actually saw him talking with birds last season so why the surprise.

Ed behind Frenchie in every room like a fucking dead child jumpscare in leather.

He’s actually terrifying all calm and smiling. You can sense that he can turn at every second. Like a MF snake (you know the ones, fuck yuuuuu)

Sir when you approach me like that, all analytical and stuff, I don’t think there’s anything I won’t let you do to me (imagine Ed turning this on Stede in the bedroom pffffiouuu)

*Wheeze « A panto ? » (give this man an Oscar)

I really have trouble with « he’s our dick ».. you are aware that this is the man who had absolutely no problem stranding your love on an island ? Who pushed for it, even ? That in the memory you evoke, he’s the only one not sitting with you all, all alone in the background sulking ? I guess if you consider him like the nasty old dog who bites everyone and barks all the time, I can see it…

You have hope, it’s cute . Archie is actually really interesting because she represents the classic pirate (like Ed’s crew before being Stedefied), being put amongst the crew of what she thinks is probably the rockstar of captains but they do things all weird and emotional (between bloodbaths). You can see that she’s tempted but also don’t hesitate to throw the first punch in the battle to the death because that’s how stuff goes.

Take the fucking leg (« …bitch » very much implied)

The little ships were all over the place. They kinda treat Olu like a himbo this season which if my memories serve me right was the opposite of what he was last season. (He’s still emotionally intelligent but the logical sense seems to have gone. In this scene anyway)

Every time a new character says China, I cannot take out of my mind that they are mocking Trump. (Roach’s one in particular was spot on)

Awwww Olu’s all bashful and shit, I’m sure he’s moving his shoe on the ground, like a little shy child.

Stede, All happy about the soup : So wild it’s insane ! Lucius, eyes rolling to the back of his head : Jesus Christ, Stede, keep your pants on. * gets up and go drag on his cigaret like an old nihilist prostitute. * Ahahaha! Lucius is so done with Stede, I can’t ! He reminds me of me with my mom when I was a teenager. (I was horrible)

shitty pathetic incompetent captain  Holy shit, this burn must have dried up the ocean and that’s why they have to drag the boat on land.

The Oookay of Black Pete must be studied.

I had a dream about you last night  and with that phrase, all Blackhands shippers burst into flames. To then die a horrible death for the next minutes and being turned to dust at … best I could. (Also, If I had told you about « good for you » « it was good for me » I don’t think this is how you would have envision it)

But seriously the acting in this scene was INSANE. (I mean more than good, I mean stellar)his laugh is haunting me.

Wait… wait.. is he doing the romcom trope of being horrible to him so that he would leave, to protect him ? but instead he tortures him until he has no choice but to kill him ? Ed, darling, you basic trope girl.

Yeah I guess we could call it closure. Hum.

Yeah, I am ! And I’m alone ! Don’t be like me. Stede has evolved SO MUCH. I’m actually very much hopeful about the discussion he’s going to have with Ed. It won’t be miscommunication bullshit.

The puppet game… Something tells me Lucius won’t like to listen to Pinocchio anymore. Don’t even ask him to make any voice. Stede! The hand went where you think!

Well, Hello back little black scarf which goes with everything ! Especially with the ultimate descent into the pitts of madness and despair.

Stede is choosing « alive » on Blackbeard old poster : thank you, magic of belief, for saving Ed’s life !

There’s a drawing, I repeat, he doodled Ed’s face amongst little bouts of emo poetry… oh stede.

Beheading, arsoning, just a little bit of a dick love of his life.

HE’S NOT BROKEN. SHUT UP !

calm down, you two, with the head against head : you kissed once. In the words of spicy rat boy « Jesus Christ keep your pants on »

Romance novel cover one legged indestructible little fucker Izzy under the rain.

IZZY’S HEAD ON FANG’S SHOULDER AS THEY ARE KILLING ED, WHAT !

After the pyramid scheme, Olu being the get away text.

Okay, on to the next. It will be a fucking novel.

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd season 2 #ofmd spoilers #our flag means death season 2 #thoughts #second viewing #ofmd meta #i had notes

[marxthedumdum]

more crimsonoak headcanons start clapping everyone (yipee)

❀ ofc this will be the shapeshifting creature, anomaly, monster steven thing version we have built in this blog that will be used LMAO (I BLAME YALL for making me have a hyperfix on this /j) ❀ SOOOOO uhhh abt steven-zard, he's def gets bigger, but his clothes doesnt get bigger with him. imagine he just. outgrew his clothes and rips them. (pray for daisy's bank for oh my god the size of the clothes she'll have to commission for him (and the weird questions abt why would she need clothes that big)) ❀ when the two cuddle, steven would like it so much he'd shapeshift into multiple random (not dangerous and VERY cuddleable) pokemon in quick sucession and zooming around her and wagging his tail very fast an- ❀ *very happy steven noises and purrs* ❀ speaking of shapeshift, he can do other weird stuff other than turning into pokemon too. be it turning his legs into digitigrade legs, grow an extra finger and splitting his own body open revealing long terrifying tentacles with mouths with sharp teeth everywhere on his body. :D (he LOVES doing this to scare daisy like the giant bitch he is on halloween) ❀ they would enjoy pineapple pinap berry and pepperoni tauros meat pizza together (ive tried this pizza once and omg i love it sm (i thank the pizza company for making pineapple taste good on pizza <3)) ❀ besides sleeping with daisy on her bed, he'd sometimes to choose to stay under her bed instead like her friendly sleep paralysis demon, he holds daisy's hand from the bedside whenever he assumes she might have a nightmare (i think yall def know where i got this hc from,,,) ❀ "hey blue check out my new dog :3" ❀ shows off steven as an edgy goodra ❀ "WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT THING???" ❀ if someone hurts daisy (either physically or by manipulation and hurting her feelings/mental health), they got 5 seconds left to enjoy life : 3 ❀ if steven ever grows fur on his body and daisy gives pets and scratches to his hair mane or any parts on him that have the floof then steven will IMMEDIATELY wrap himself TIGHT around daisy (lovingly), he's the definition of the human personification of a can of red bull /hj

#pokepasta #strangled red #strangled red steven #crimsonoak #crimsonoak shipping

[littlekohai77]

Hey bestie bro ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ This is my first time requesting so... May I request Ian and Elay relationship headcanons pls (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

Elay and Ian dating hcs

𝚃𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚛𝚎𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚎 𝚋𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚘 :3

𝙷𝚞𝚐𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚔𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚞𝚞𝚞

𝙽𝚘𝚠 𝚒𝚖𝚖𝚊 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚐𝚎𝚝 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚒𝚝!

𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚏𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍, 𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎𝚕𝚢 𝚘𝚘𝚌

*･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*

𝙸𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙴𝚕𝚊𝚢.

𝚆𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚎𝚡𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚒𝚛 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛.. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚜... 𝚂𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚐𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚋𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚏𝚏 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝... 𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚢 𝚋𝚒𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜-

🅸🅰🅽:

He's very protective. Surprisingly protective. Like he won't let a damn pigeon get near you type protective.

He says "what if that pigeon is an assassin in disguise? "

And you just look back at him questioning why you like him.

He's so smart... And yet so dumb. Like, he knows the Pythagorean theorem but he doesn't know that pigeons can't kill humans.

Y'all gossip about people. Like you guys have the hottest of teas. You guys literally have dates where all you do is spill tea and talk shit.

The plethora of nicknames you guys have given Julien is unbelievable. Suit obsessed weirdo, jelly hair, smelly pants, 2nd ML, pussy deprived incel, jiyoungless, the guy with the weird smelling perfume, obsessive weirdo, stalker, the guy jiyoung would never date, rejected, rizzless.

You guys obviously don't use them around him and use them to conceal the fact that you're talking about him.... But I think everyone and their mom knows who you're talking about.

You guys are that one Pinterest couple. You always have the most trendy clothes and even if it's weird, you two still look good in them.

You guys have almost 4 million followers on Pinterest. Y'all are fucking famous but not for which family he's from.

But you guys never show your faces in those pics so, nobody knows that it's you guys. Even though people around you vaguely know.

He can't do chorus for the life of him. Like he's powerful, he can do sooooo much and yet he doesn't know how to wash a damn plate....

So you have to do everything, but he doesn't let that happen too. He's like, "Why are you doing the maid's work? "

And you're just looking back at him like, 'this is why you don't know how to do anything'

Sometimes you're fearing how he's gonna survive alone. Cause what if he gets kicked out? What's he gonna do?

He hates pets. He doesn't like cats or dogs or birds. He's not allergic. He just hates them.

He loves kids. He plays with most of the little children in his family. Every kid has at least three toys that they've got from him.

Everytime he goes somewhere, he always buys so much stuff. For you, his 1st cousin, 2nd cousin, 3rd cousin, 4th cousin, 5th cousin, 6th cousin-

He doesn't have a spice tolerance, which is why he can't eat most of the things that you cook.

But oooohhhh does he love sweets and candy. Honey is his favourite.

He begs you to make honey desserts a tonnn. Like he'll literally roll on the bed whining and let you braid his hair with silly accessories.

He doesn't like his hair to be touched. At all. Like it took about 2 months into the relationship for him to finally let you touch his hair.

He also doesn't like physical contact. But only when it's someone else initiating it. If he's the one to initiate, then it's okay.

🅴🅻🅰🆈:

He's a simple man with a simple wish, for his ducklings and you to live a long and happy life.

He's a great cook. He can cook for the both of you.

He tried to teach you once and I think we all know how that went down. Ever since then he never suggested it. In fact, he's been keeping you from stepping into the kitchen.

BEST BROTHER AWARD GOES TOOO!!! YOU GUESSED IT!!! ✨✨ELAY✨✨

You don't have to try to grow close with his brother. He won't mind (that's a lie) if you don't get along with his brother. He'll still be with you despite him.

In fact, his brother will be the one making efforts to be on your good side. Because he doesn't want Big bro Elay to be sad and wants to be close to his future sister-in-law.

Elay isn't someone who plays around. And when he does get serious about a relationship he does everything in his ability to be with them.

If he's with you, longer than minimum 6 months and maximum 11 months, it probably means he could be considering you as a potential candidate for the position of his wife.

He has the patience of a monk but he doesn't have the patience to remain with someone he never plans to marry longer than he needs to.

He likes to cuddle. But it's hard (pun unintended). His muscles are too hard. He's too ripped. So hugging him feels like hugging a rock. So y'all don't cuddle that much. And he's very sad about that. :(

Some things he does are so adorable and kawaii and so unexpected.

Like who could've know he has a cutesy kawaii voice that he specifically uses with you? His lil baby.

This is what y'all's texts look like,

Elay: come over (✿ ♥‿♥)

You: can't :3

Elay: why not? :(

You: busy rn :(

Elay: ( ⚈̥̥̥̥̥́⌢⚈̥̥̥̥̥̀)

And then he'll keep spamming you with sad emoticons till he finishes the popcorn he made for both of you to eat and watch the movie with.

He'll be really quiet when you come home.

He doesn't talk much or express that much emotion on his face but he can deliver a lot when it's necessary.

Like whenever you're insecure he'll sit down with you in front of the mirror and point out all that he likes about you and is beautiful, which is basically everything and if you say something like "but it's fat! And ugly! " he'll fight you with logic. He'll bring up how fake and pointless beauty standards are and how once upon a time being chubby was the standard and symbol for beauty.

He's not letting you bring yourself down. Don't even try.

#eleceed #eleceed x reader #world academy #world academy arc #eleceed elay #elay #ian #ian patrick