#which is making the flare up worse

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

.

#ibs flare up is fuckin up my routine #which is causing anxiety #which is making the flare up worse #which is fuckin up my routine even more #its a vicious cycle #too much acidic food yesterday #also period ended so?? hormones being fucky probably??? #doesnt help #i also may have pmdd (which is obviously not affecting me right now but it hit me HARD last week) #so thats a new and fun thing thats happening /s #like damn past few weeks have been hell #got a cold from my dad that i finally seem to be completely over #then had a complete meltdown last week due to my anxiety spinning wildly out of control #then that stopped and my period started which means The Cramps began #thankfully they werent as bad as last months but they went on for like 3 days when they usually stop after the first day #but then that ended finally last night just in time for an ibs flare up which made my anxiety spike which made it so i couldnt fall asleep #my body hates me this month #just one thing after another #also i seem to be experiencing sciatica. which is not new. happens sometimes. but ahhhhhhhhhh #😢 i just wanna sleep #but im not tired 😢 #and i have a dentist appointment tomorrow which is fine. but is just another thing that fucks with my routine #and ive had too many disruptions to my routine this month #i would like to stop

[milkweedman]

Hi, you said in your bio that you're chronically ill. I was wondering if you had any tips for knitting with chronic pain (assuming that's your flavour of chronic illness)? Or do you know anyone who could give me advice?knitting/sewing is my sanity-saver.

I use compression gloves, only knit with specific weights of yarn (the ones that are the least painful for me), and try to take frequent breaks, which for me looks like switching hobbies every 30 minutes or so (knitting to spinning to knitting, etc). I also do my best to be very gentle on my joints when i can, altho i honestly rarely have the choice at work.

Personally i have joint problems and migraines, so thats what im correcting for/trying not to make worse. Helpful advice probably varies depending on what youre trying to correct for. Really my only general advice is "when it starts to hurt, try to stop" and "if possible, save the painfully difficult stuff for when youre doing well, and make the easier stuff your usual work"

If anyone who sees this has got other tips please feel free to comment them

#i havent knit socks in a while and i realized my last wrist and thumb issue flare up was the last time i did socks #and also right now when im doing socks again #which is making me think maybe my wrists are better than i thought generally speaking but knitting just destroys them #socks specifically i tend to zone out with and ignore pain signals #idk what to do with that info tho. i guess knit fewer socks :( #anyway there may be some things like that which you can save for when youre feeling comparatively well #but chronic pain isnt actually my issue and i can and will work thru pain to the continual degradation of my joints #so rly the joints getting worse is what my problem is #so i dont know how much if any of this is helpful to you #sorry im replying right before i need to leave for work and thru a migraine so. might try and think of something more helpful and update #my answer #chronic illness

[skitskatdacat63]

I literally can't stop thinking about this sequence of pictures, actually completely brainrotting me

#ever since i watched aus 2009 i cant stop scrolling back up in my gallery to stare at these #like pics that genuinely make me roll around on my bed and squeal #GAHHHHHH LIKE THE WAY SEB IS GRINNING UP AT AND HESITANTLY PLACING HIS HAND ON HIS CHEST #AND THEN JENSON NOTICES AND MY GOD THE WAY HES LOOKING AT HIM I CANT I CANT #THE WAY THEYRE SMILING AT ESCH OTHER IM GONNA LOSE IT #AND LOOK HOW HARD JENSE IS GRIPPING HIM GODDDDDDDD #like i really cant express in words how these make me feel its actually just *tv static noises* #i feel like im grinning so hard looking at these that im gonna explode #(also @grace if you see these: ive been reading solar flare lately and GOD YOURE SO RIGHT WHEN YOU REFERENCED IT) #(theres this part where mark says to jb that hes been looking up podium/press pics of them online) #(and that they look like theyre in love HE IS LITERALLY ME FRRRRRR LIKE IM GOING INSANE OVER IT) #(these pics brainrotted me before i started reading it but reading it has only made it 100x worse/better) #anyways i really really like 2009 sebson they're so endearing to me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #ig its just smth about how theyre so affectionate with each other despite being each others rivals #like constantly patting/nudging/hugging each other IM GONNA CRYYYYY IM GONNA EXPLODEEEE #i put these pics in the comp i made if seb but like bcs of the magnitude to which they affect me i needed to make a posr for them #just imagine me wailing and losing my mind irl and in these tags sob sob sob #if i stay committed w watching races ill just keep on going to the end of the v8 era so dw my wailing can only get worse :D #every time i scroll up out of the tags to look at the pics again i feel my heart skipping a bit HDJFKGKGKGL #anyways unhinged wdym unhinged :) #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #jenson button #jb22 #sv5 #sebson #2009 australian gp

[lovelaceisntdead]

i think i just need to rewatch lost.

#that will fix me i think. #because i am doing. bad. i know i have not been keeping this a secret but i feel very stuck and i don't really know what to do. #my general anxiety levels are much higher than they usually are and um. i don't really know why. which then just makes it worse. #and i feel so down and hopeless. i can't make myself feel excited about things. i have hardly any motivation #and no energy to do anything even if i did #like yellowjackets s3 starting production and i just don't feel excited about it and it's making me really sad #and I'm getting upset about things that i feel silly for getting upset about and i can't say anything because I'm embarrassed #for being upset in the first place #i feel so incredibly disconnected from everyone around me it's so hard to talk to anyone #I'm running on autopilot most of the time at the moment #and I'm finding it so hard not to push people away. but at the same time i feel so out of place and I'm dissociating a lot so. #idk whay I'm saying with this #i just feel like i need to get stuff out because i feel so anxious i might explode #and with the weather getting warmer a lot of my physical symptoms are flaring up. anf being in this house is so suffocating #i feel like i can inly exist in this perpetual state of fine. can't be any worse can't be any better #I'm just constantly pretending that I'm just Okay because it's easier than having to deal wirh anything else. but i know I'm really just #causing myself more harm. #I'm done now. just trying to relieve some of the pressure i am feeling in my whole entire body.

[hum--hallelujah]

the duality of my Dr. Benzedrine is that he's incredibly effective and ruthless at what he does (saving lives, need not concern himself with the consequences as long as the subject/victim/patient is still alive by the medical definition of the term) and he's terribly smart and has a great sense of humor, but he's also a rather confused, genuinely brain-damaged individual. like. he's scary when he's in his element, but when he's not, he sometimes can barely string a full sentence together, has panic attacks over loud noises, etc

#he is not a savant btw I kinda hate that trope. he's INCREDIBLY intelligent but the brain-to-mouth connection just doesn't... work. #the head injury itself would have probably resolved itself for the most part but there were chemicals and experiments involved #and it just means he's... really shitty at language and communication. if he's not thinking too hard about it it's easier!! #the more he thinks about it/tries too hard the worse his speech is #which is why he sounds more coherent when he's working- his mind is on what he's doing instead of ''Have To Talk Right'' #which allows him to. talk better. #the panic attacks thing tends to be either because 1) unfamiliar things like fireworks etc. or 2) sound sensitivity flare-up #...in a way I think he might be a very autistic little guy. but I'm not sure. I don't really know how to portray that #it's interesting trying to write a character who's whip-smart and clever and sarcastic but Can't Speak Properly #does any of this make sense?? #she speaks! #ddas

[icewindandboringhorror]

feeling sick constantly in the background all the time is like.. usually negligible-ish.. until multiple various chronic background issues all happen to overlap at once and then it’s like 

#Like usually I cycle between like. joint pain issues. chest muscle injury stuff. back pain. stomach problems. headaches. etc. #There is never a day that I feel totally normal for the most part. but it's usually just little things here and there on and off #chronic things that seem to flare up sometimes. But then every once in a while it's like the flare ups align and I'll have 6 of the problems #at the same time and then is AaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #For some reason it's okay to deal with one or two of these things at any given time. but if I have to deal with like 3+ at once #or two of the old ones plus one NEW thing I've never had before or etc. etc. #I just can't even do anything. I run around stressed out of my mind unable to focus on any tasks or do anything but feel bad #then I cant even play games or do fun stuff becuause my brain wont let me be distracted from fixating on the fact that I feel bad #It's kind of the same way that it's stressful for me to go into grocery stores because my brain LITERALLY just is not capable of tuning out #all of the noises and lights and sensory information - so it' gets overwhelming quickly. I also just literally cannot tune out sensory infor #mation from my body. so if something feels even a LITTLE weird or a LITTLE painful or is even slightly different than usual #especially if it's overlapping with multiple other 'low level chronic pain' type things then my brain is just like.. being given way too muc #h information that it still cant tune out and then I can't focus and just walk around in a daze for however long until one of the issues #goes away on it's own (like joint pain flare ups usually come and go etc. etc.). or until I see a doctor abut whatever the new thing is #and maybe something they do or say actually helps or etc. etc. #Idk I have SO SO much I want to do the beginning of the year and so many projects to finish and things to post and schedules I have #written out for me to get on (like excercising more consistently and etc.) and it's just furstrating for my brain to just be like #ah.. nope.. we are not doing that. instead we are going to be completely incapacitated by a host of physical issues #which I think most ''normal people'' would just ignore like ''oh yeah I'll just load myself up on ibuprophen and coffee and energy #drinks and advil and sleep supplements and this and that'' or whatever but I can't do that it just makes stuff worse. I have to just sit for #days having a mind battle like 'okay yes we're having these problems.. but we can still like.. do SOMETHING right? we could like.. write #or draw. or things that don't take much energy'' and brain is just like NO!!! WE CANT!!! BECAUSE!! THING IS WEIRD!!!' and it's like okay #but thing is going to be weird. there's nothing we can do about thing being weird right now. so we should just focus on something else #'NO!! CANNOT TUNE OUT THING BEING WEIRD!! lets just fixate on it instead and wander aimlessly from thing to thing never able #to fully focus on any other task. hee hee''. anyway. hhghh.. sometimes I just get tired of having Various Ailments at any given time #especially unexplained ones or weird recurring problems that doctors haven't done much about because then it lends to paranoia like #'what if something is seriously wrong but I just dont know it yet?' which could be the case. I mean hopefully not. but I just hate stuff #being unexplained. because if there's no clear answer then the answer could be anything. even somehting bad. *** :V #ANYWAY gghhb... just bothered at the moment. I was going to come here like 'hey maybe I could post some drafts or pictures or something that #could feel productive!' but.. i dont feel like it. i dont care. too focused on Bad Feeling. just going to complain instead lol

[seventh-district]

i’m not like other girls, my “Rest” stats are a heart rate of 110bpm and a HRV of 14 fucking milliseconds. :)

#Seven’s Public Diary #vent #vent post #cw vent #cw vent post #cw health #cw heart #i’m so stressed :) i am soooo fucking stressed and my body is Suffering because of it #i want to just lay here and stare at the ceiling but. maybe a little venting will help #sighhhh wish [N]MbD Sun were here to obsessively fret over me #he can be mean about it idc. at least i’d have someone acknowledging how bad things are for me #sometimes i wonder when the last time was that my body Wasn’t in fight or flight to some degree #have i Ever actually relaxed #hhhhhhh c-ptsd is a bitch #anyways there’s so much to vent about but i’m. doing my best to be vague. i need to be more vague about things #a lot of stuff i can’t vent about anyways. it’s too personal #so instead i’m gonna complain abt how i haven’t been able to play Genshin or Star Rail for nearly a month now #and about how slowly my back is recovering. it’s like every time i re-injure/have a flare up. it heals.. worse. slower and lesser #i dunno how it’s ever gonna get better. truly better. maybe i’ll live with this forever #if being fat is the problem which is definitely partly is. then yeah i’m fucked #all of my problems just make each other worse and i don’t know where the way out of it all is #every time i think i’ve found it i’m wrong and i just make it all worse #anyways as soon as i figure out how to strengthen my core without breaking my back. it’s over for u bitches #‘u bitches’ being uh. all of the shit that needs doing that i cannot physically fucking do right now #i miss being able to sit down. and i’m Regretting de-converting my standing desk back to sitting bc now. i cannot use my PC #which means i can’t fucking do a some of my work or play my silly little gacha games and i’m mad abt it #i’m mad abt a lot more serious things too but again. can’t talk abt it so i’m gonna focus on trivial shit instead #anyways. sorry as always to everyone i haven’t spoken with lately. and in general. i’m so drained from the Everything that i just. can’t. #it shouldn’t be this hard for me to stay in touch w ppl but. it is. guess i’ll add that onto my list of things to be stressed about #i’m so tired of everything man. and i hate being so negative and mean when im stressed & in pain. makes me feel like im becoming my father

[mythicalcoolkid]

After too many years here I've final what hornets' nests I am not brave enough to kick

#m/cc #thought about making a certain post and decided... no... I would rather not #I am not prepared for responses to that. it might actually kill me #specifically it was: #'going gluten/dairy/food dye-free CAN improve certain neurodevelopmental things but it cannot 'cure' autism/ADHD/Tourette's' #I already know I'd get vitriol both from people claiming I think autism comes from gluten or 'needs cured' because they can't read the post #and that I'm trying to trick everyone into going gluten-free because Toxins or something and lying about a connection #(even though (neuro)dev disorders can be made worse by flaring immune issues like - oh I don't know - undiagnosed gluten intolerance? #hypersensitivity to certain food dyes? #we already know autism and ADHD in particular have HUGE correlations with gastro and immune issues #which is why some mommy bloggers genuinely do see symptom improvement from diet changes) #and from people saying 'um actually no-gluten DID cure my nephew's ADHD?? the science is on our side/big gluten is covering up the research #and I don't know if I could handle dozens of people per day telling me I'm a science denier AND a eugenist from both sides #I am simply. ADHD. and autistic. and incredibly interested in the wild amount of comorbid physical disorders that correlate with these #autoimmune and gastro issues but also loose/hypermobile joints; epilepsy; delayed sleep phase disorder; COPD; skin conditions #it's so fascinating to me and provides a huge chunk of data to run with re: the gut-brain axis #whether [neurodev] causes [other]/[other] causes [neurodev] or an underlying thing causes both is unknown #but honestly with the huge interest in the gut-brain axis and microbiome in the past decade or so #I think we're going to see a lot more research in the next thirty or forty years examining physical comorbidities with neurodev stuff #I'm probably not gonna link to research because I don't wanna just start the war anyway and I'm too tired to go back and find the articles #but the TL;DR of the tags is neurodev stuff isn't caused by gluten intolerance but if you're unknowingly aggravating a gluten intolerance #you're probably not gonna feel great and it's gonna make your symptoms worse because of the effect it has on your body #it's like a very mild long-term allergic reaction and yeah if you get rid of that it'll improve other areas (e.g. sleep cycle; irritability #so of Course it's gonna improve a bunch of things-that-get-worse-with-poor-sleep/decreased-stress-tolerance #if you were always sitting on a slightly uncomfortable chair you'd probably do a lot better if I switched the chair #just because you can focus better or you didn't know the chair was uncomfortable doesn't mean it caused your ADHD #also in this case the chair affects your hormone levels and immune response and what chemicals accidentally leak into your bloodstream #if you're interested look it up there's been a Ton of research on correlations of specific physical issues with neurodev in recent years

[dirtytransmasc]

me: sick on top of being chronically ill and in a massive flare, dizzy, bodies on fire, my bones hurt, my heart currently beating out of my chest, etc. so I feel like absolute shit and like I might pass out.

my family (who I'm currently staying with): invites other family, including a small child over

my family: makes me home our big ass dog back so she doesn't tackle said child (she's friendly, that j god, just a bit... overzealous in her affections)

my dad: looks at the multiple able bodied, not sick, not in pain, not on the verge of passing out, people, this g to find someone to help him.

my dad: "hey you, yeah you, the sick one, the one who looks dead on their legs, the one who shouldn't be interacting with family let alone the food they will be eating, come shuck corn, bring it out to the grill (it's like 90 degrees, I thought I was dying the second I opened the door), and complete this list of small house errands (including going into the luckily finished attic, basement, and out to the trash) 😃👍"

me: first off, I hope you all get this bug (besides the baby, everyone else are onlookers who could have stepped in), second off, when I pass the fuck out, it's all your problems.

(small note, I know this sucks and everything, and the nice thing to do seems like it should be comforting words and apologies, but I need dark humor and jokes right now, cause pity and kind words, while assumingly genuine, will only piss me off in my current state, cause it's all I get from my sucky family and it just triggers something deep inside me)

#the audacity is fucking wild #my dad definitely takes advantage of my inability to handle conflict and therefore inability to say no #and my family takes my “compliance” amd “willingness” as a sign to not step in despite my obvious distress #im tired #my head feels like it weighs an extra 30 pounds #my nose is on fire #ive had this bug for days #my POTS and chronic pain was already flared up but now its ten times worse #I feel like I might actually die #I have erythromelalgia which makes my hands and feet burn in response to my POTS. heat. and stress #so lets just say I feeling like im standing on hot coals and my hands are on fire #loving that too #someone end me #disabled #disability #pots syndrome #chronic pain

[thethingything]

oh god so standing up for a while seems to ease our tailbone pain a bit, which didn't used to happen when it flared up in the past, but if we stand up for more than a few minutes we get really dizzy and nauseous and everything else hurts more instead, and standing too often or for too long triggers ME/CFS flares for us, so standing up for any length of time isn't really a viable option

#personal #thoughts #🍬 post #vent post #I had to go and get something from downstairs which meant standing up for a while #and it's the most relief I've had since the pain flare started but I also felt really fucking ill with our POTS symptoms #but like last night standing up made the pain worse so idk why it's helping now when it was making it worse a few hours ago

[milkweedman]

Another doctor visit where my symptoms are either compared directly to EDS or else i am outright told i almost certainly have it, but why would i want a diagnosis lol

(Cue me explaining that i need custom knee braces to stop my knees hyperextending 24/7 including in my sleep and for this i need a diagnosis of SOMETHING so my insurance will cover it, which is met with like. A shrug)

#sigh #was the former today #got prescribed a muscle relaxant for flare ups which does sound promising #but i asked abt whether that would make my subluxations and dislocations worse and she was like. well we just dont know #which i get that but if it does then im fucked for the next 3 months again #idk i hope they work #i laid down for 2 hours around 5am bc i finally felt tired only to be immediately hit with horrible pain everywhere #which was so bad it took. the whole two hours to get back up. did not sleep. was absolutely covered in cold sweat #miserable. RIP. #chronic illness

[stardustedknuckles]

not doing great yesterday or today lads.

#chronic-les #if mcas is what we are dealing with then that's the episode I had yesterday and today #and now a probable kidney stone? #i was able to drive to the hospital during today's flare #got my emergency bloodwork done even though they had trouble finding a vein becasue I was inflamed all over #cried all day #which will cause more flare stuff #stood up to talk to dad for four minutes and broke out in sweat and bp dropped again #pots? mcas? yes? #took another hydroxyzine just now and it's helping but what is it doing to my kidney stones #also it's going to put me to sleep probably #anyway rambling #how do I make it recede if it's a flare #salt makes kidney stones worse but gatorade doesn't NOT help #i'm not even tired #i think the progestin is really helping my energy #but I am exhausted in another way

[athousandcowboys]

.

#very rude of my chronic illness to be flaring up rn i LITERALLY have fics to write #laying in bed is so boring but not laying in bed makes me feel like my brain is meltinf #also feels like my left arm is trying to exit my torso #which is normal for me but it’s worse now #is it the cold??? maybe idk #the worst part of my baseline being just barely able to get through a day #is that anything below that baseline i am just a sentient puddle #vent

[oliverniko]

Chronic illness can be amusing sometimes, I've been in a fluctuating fibromyalgia flare for a little over a week now (peaked on Sunday) and doing art today when my body couldn't handle it has badly affected my bladder pain of all things. Like worse migraine from art I can get, but bladder? 😂

#It does make sense because it just means I've impacted the illness in general which means heightened symptoms in general #and my bladder is one that likes to get worse lately if fibro is pissed at me #Surface level though it's like? Really? Anyway pray for me #I feel like all this year has been so far is constant flare ups and not being able to do what I want to lmao #ramblings

[fingertipsmp3]

Like yeah I can absolutely be charming and personable when I need to be, but I have to be in the correct headspace first. Like I have to not be catatonically depressed about my dog dying and my sister dying and winter in the north being so bleak!!! Can we talk about it

#like believe it or not i was actually such a good barista #i was bright; energetic; kind; funny; i had a good rapport with my colleagues and the customers #i used to sing orders & totals and i’d do a little boogie whenever i was on hot drinks (my favourite station. and i didn’t boogie #with drinks in my hand; promise) #but that was in the summer when i had an alive dog and two functioning knees!!!!! #okay honestly. my right knee is damn near fully functioning again. i mean yeah i still have a level of stiffness but it’s rare i’m actually #in pain with it. the inflammation only really flares up if i do too much or on very cold and wet days #my physio plans to discharge me in two weeks. it’s good! #but i’m still just like. i know what it is now; to have chronic pain for months on end & to recover from a long term injury #and to not trust a part of my body. and i don’t even know why it happened!!! #the working theory is that my knee at the time of the injury was a ticking time bomb because i had a weak shitty vmo (holds the kneecap in #the socket) and i have hypermobile knees (they bend backwards quite dramatically) #but why i dislocated it so hard that i overextended two ligaments and tore a bunch of muscle fibres is still beyond comprehension #all i was trying to do was approach the counter and ring up a customer order. like #so forgive me if i’m not exactly chirpy #like shit is a vicious cycle atm because the sadder i am the shittier everything seems and the worse things go in life #which just makes me increasingly more upset #i should seek therapy. i feel like when i requested therapy back in october and then cancelled it i cursed myself lol #my sister died like… a few days after that? and okay we were never close. we were estranged actually. hadn’t seen each other or spoken #in 12 years. but there’s this thing that happens where you start wondering what might’ve been. and you feel guilty that you weren’t close #like what Could we have been to each other. what if we had been close. what could i have helped her with. what could we both have learned #what if i’d met her kids. etc #and i’m so upset about mabel that i feel like throwing up. i just wish she was still here. i want to fight whoever invented canine dementia #i just wish everyone would leave me alone for a bit. let me cocoon myself until i’ve figured out my grief and the evenings are lighter #and everything seems less pointless. maybe then i’ll be able to fake being happy for long enough that someone will give me a fucking job #personal

[icewindandboringhorror]

mentally ill people who for whatever reason end up wearing the same exact clothing so many days in a row that it begins to disintegrate and will still not stop wearing it until it’s literally just scraps of fabric VS. those weird shitty rich people who ‘’can’t be seen in the same outfit twice’’ human dichotomy 

#poast brought to you by my pants that are missing an entire leg and completely open in the back and the front almost #to the point they could not really be considered pants anymore (I wear lots of layers so i have shorts under them but lol) #I tore them again sitting down and it made me introspect about when it's time to throw clothes out and how everyone has different standards #and etc. Like how some people will get stains on clothing and just throw it away #.where others will keep wearing stained stuff if they have an attachment to it. etc. etc. #or like One hole in jeans is okay but 20 holes is Crossing A Line - unless they were made that way as a fashion trend #which then made me think about those people who like.. change clothes multiple times a day and never want to rewear stuff #and just have a constant stream of fast fashion etc. Anyway. not a real dichotomy. just being silly. i like to think about humans behaviors #brggghghb.. still not being very productive as I just keep having flare up after flare up of various chronic issues I have so I'm feeling #sick like every few days but always for different reasons. As if something has increased the general inflammation in my entire body #and its just bopping around making different things worse here and there. but I'm not sure of any underlying cause. #theorectially could always be stress since I am often stressed but I don't feel stressed more than usual. I have no infection markers #on blood tests and my covid tests so far have been negative. I guess my body just felt like 'hey happy new year. would you like.. uhm... #some... Problems.. as a treat? OuO'' #I mean I'm lucky at this point that I don't have a condition that makes me completely bedridden or something and am grateful for that but #having so many smaller issues in the background overlapping all the time can be ehxausting and make it feel like a larger issue #because you just never get a break. once one problem clears up it's another. etc. modifying diet. supplements. doctors. new issue. new modif #ications. new doctors. new this #new that. etc. For my body to reach some sort of non-inflammed stable state I feel like I'm going to have to just be suspended in a gladd #*glass antigravity chamber for 3 years eating nothing but basic gruel and iv liquids. something so bland and so untriggering of anything #that literally nothing can be inflammed or etc. lol.. Though I'd probably still somehow have joint pain even with nogravity. #ANYWAY... I did finally edit a new sims video. for the few of you that follow my sims youtube. I have costumes totally ready to post I just #literally havent had the energy to queue up the photos. STILL WORKING ON EVIL WORLDBULDING SLIDESHOW task of epic proportions #. other videos. other stuff. I've had to spend some time on social stuff since I really ned to get started finding friends in the potential #places I'd like to move so I know people when I get there. as it takes me like years to trust someone. but hjgh... I am so like. inherently #unrelatable to the average person. at least the avg people on friend making sites and stuff. I even made a perosnal compatibility quiz #but again.. thats something most people don't do lol... ''buhh just text snapchat me & get to know me through conversation why should i take #a 15 minute quiz up front?'' shut up. i woudl LOVE to take a custom compatibility quiz before talking to someone. its efficent. you will nev #er get it. that is a positive to me. if only anyone else did that. if only. (I'm being jokingly rude. its perfectly reaosnable for people to #have different standards and communication styles. etc. etc. lol) ANYWAY.. tldr me sleepy and feel bad no productive wehh