#whatever I’m an adult I can face the consequences of my actions

[supernovaa-remnant]

about to have my physics final 😔 wish me luck o7

#me being faced with my ta and classmates when I skipped the past two tutorial sections like 🧍‍♀️ #listennn at least I didn’t miss a single lab and that’s the most important thing imo #tutorial section sucked anyway 😒 especially after I’d decided to switch majors #like it’s not like it was gonna fuck with my grade thaaat badly y’know? #whatever I’m an adult I can face the consequences of my actions #<- has intense social anxiety but it’s okay I simply won’t engage #stella rambles

[thecuriousquest]

Caught

Tag List: @issamomma

Yandere Platonic EraserMic x Reader

Warning: Yandere themes, spanking with a belt, controlling parents, guilt tripping/manipulation, mentioning of violence towards another person

Summary: You’ve been under the thumb of your adopted parents since you were ten. Seven years later, and they’re still treating you like a little kid. You just want some space, to spend time with your friends outside of school.

Checkout my Master List here.

——

You get a text from your friend, Takeru. He invites you to a skating rink with some classmates of yours. Chewing on your bottom lip, you wander off to find your parents.

They look at you with lights in their eyes as you walk into the room. You are their darling little girl. Their entire world revolves around you. They tell you this often, making you feel loved and safe.

When you ask them if you can go out with some friends, however, that light begins to dim in their eyes.

“What friends do you want to go out with?” Mic, your Papa, asks.

“Well…it was Takeru who invited me. He just said it was going to be us and some classmates.”

Your Dad, Aizawa, snorts at the mentioning of a boy’s name. “No, you’re not going out. Forget it.”

You knew this was likely going to happen, but you haven’t been able to hangout with anyone in so long. You just want a night away from your overbearing loving parents.

“I won’t stay out late, and we’ll be with people from my class. There will be girls and adults around. If something happens, I can go get someone who works there, and I can call you. Please?”

Aizawa sets down his book with a loud thud. You take a step back as he stands up.

“Y/N, we’re not discussing this anymore. You have your answer. You’re not going and that’s final. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, sir.” Looking down, you dig your nails into your palms.

“Go to your room,” he orders as he sits back down.

Tears gather in your eyes as you run upstairs to your room, slamming the door shut out of anger.

Whatever, they can’t fucking stop me. I’ll sneak out. I just need to come up with a plan, you think.

Trying to sneak out of a house where two pro heroes live is going to be a hard achievement, but it can’t be that hard, right?

———

“You think I enjoy doing this?” Shouta swings the belt down a fourth time. “You think punishing you is something I like to do?” A fifth lash from the belt comes down upon your upturned bottom. “I don’t enjoy this one bit! I hate doing this to you. I wouldn’t have to if you were just good for me.” His belt repeatedly crashes down on the backside of your thighs as you wail over his knee.

“I’m sorry! I won’t try to sneak out anymore! I won’t! I won’t!”

Mic watches you from the doorway. His arms are crossed, and he leans his shoulder against the doorjamb. “You’re lucky your Dad isn’t washing your mouth out with soap. In fact, I’m thinking about doing that myself when he finishes up.”

“No, please?! I just wanted to go out with my friends!”

“You wanted to go out with a boy, and you tried to sneak behind our backs to do it. We told you that you couldn’t go, and then you lied to us. You said you understood, but you tried to sneak out anyway!”

“Dad, I’m sorry!” You’re screaming as the belt comes down twice as hard on the sensitive crest of your butt. Sitting down later is going to be difficult. “Papa, please, make him stop!” You can’t help but screech.

Shouta sighs in frustration. “Papa isn’t going to do anything because Papa agrees with me, and you just showed me that you’re nowhere near sorry. You need to learn to face the consequences of your own actions instead of trying to run away from them.”

Screaming at the top of your lungs, you bury your face in your hands as your dad resumes the punishment. You had counted fifteen strikes, but after that, you find that your sobbing has taken over. You have no idea what number you’re on. All you know is that your bottom feels raw and bruised.

Aizawa pulls you up on his lap. He’s making you sit directly on his thigh, forcing you to feel every bit of your punishment.

“No more lying. No more secret keeping. No more sneaking around behind our backs. As much as I hate doing this to you, my belt will outlast your backside every time. You hear me?” He bounces you on his knee slightly to make sure you’re listening.

Crying out in pain, you nod in understanding. “Yes, sir!” You wipe your tears away. “I’m sorry, sir.”

Shouta rubs your back. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Just, don’t do it again. You really disappointed us, and it’ll take a while before we can trust you again.”

Trust. Disappointment. You’ve heard these guilt tripping words plenty of times before, and it always works to make you their docile little girl.

“Yes, sir. I’ll do better.”

“Why don’t you go apologize to Papa?” Aizawa gives you a peck on the cheek and helps you off of his lap.

You walk over to Mic, rubbing your butt slightly. “I’m sorry, Papa. I’m sorry for lying, secret keeping, and sneaking around. I’m sorry I disappointed you and lost your trust.” You’re so ashamed of yourself. You can’t even manage to look him in the eye.

Mic wraps his long limbs around you in a hug. You love his scent and his warmth.

“It’s okay, Peanut. We’re only looking out for you. We aren’t trying to be the bad guys. You know that right?”

“Yes, sir. I know that. You just love me a lot.”

Shouta smiles form his seat.

“That’s right, we love you with all our hearts,” Mic tells you.

It causes you to relax even more into his chest. You find yourself falling asleep on him, worn out from this entire ordeal. Mic and Shouta put you to bed for some rest before dinner.

“Should we hurt the boy?” Mic asks Shouta as he closes the door.

“No, we’d get a lot of backlash from the media if someone were to find out.”

“We could always get some villains to do it,” the voice hero suggests.

Shouta looks at him with a smirk. “Now you’re talking.”

#my hero acedamia #boku no hero academia #yandere #triggering content #triggering themes #shouta aizawa #bnha shouta aizawa #eraserhead #yandere shouta aizawa #yandere eraserhead #hizashi yamada #bnha hizashi #present mic #yandere hizashi yamada #yandere present mic #yandere erasermic #poly erasermic #yandere poly #yandere poly erasermic

[bleue-flora]

So while I’m all for drawing the conversation away from legality, trauma, innocence, bashing c!Tommy in the name of c!Dream lol….etc. I did basically write this essay about c!Tommy first and someone asked me to share, so I shall. @poisedava this is for you. ;) <3

Here’s the thing and this is important - it does not go both ways. If c!Tommy wants to be considered an innocent ‘child’, a teenager, a minor, who is too young and naive to know that what he does is wrong and how that hurts people and has consequences then he doesn’t just get to act like an adult and start wars, serve as a government official, build nations, torture, steal, murder, enslave, commit terrorism, blackmail, assassinate…etc and face no repercussions because ‘he didn’t know better.’ If you want to act like an adult then you’ll be treated as such.

Now I don’t believe that we should view the dsmp in the realm of irl crimes, since there is no legal system or set of rules in place in the dsmp (besides the ones c!Dream set and everyone breaks of course), but if ya’ll are going to say c!Dream deserves prison because of his ‘crimes’ and write off c!Tommy’s actions as less because he is a minor then I will look at it, especially because the term ‘minor’ is connected to the legal system of our world and that is where we are deriving this perceived innocence.

On that note, there are crimes in many countries that even if you’re a minor or a child you can be tried as an adult for reasons like a severe crime (for example first degree murder) and/or if it is a repeated offense despite disciplinary actions. In this case, both apply, as many of the things listed above are repeated abhorrent offenses. Secondly, the definition of ‘minor’ and the age of becoming an adult, while typically set at 18 is not universal. In Scotland for instance, 16 is the legal age of adulthood, which is how old c!Tommy was when he joined the smp.

But looking beyond legally speaking, I for one hardly consider 16 to be a child or an innocent naive minor in the first place. At 16 I could legally drive and drove me and my sister to school. I made sure people had what they needed to keep things from falling apart, whether that’s helping with grocery shopping, making dinner, running errands, helping with homework, making lunches… etc. I hardly think someone who drives is a child unable to face consequences like speedings, drinking and driving… etc. On the topic of age I would also like to highlight that the gap is like 5 years, which all things considered is not a very big gap, not to mention one of the reasons young people are considered irresponsible and given a bit of slack is because until the age of 25 your brain is still developing, and as c!Dream was also under the age of 25 that also applies to him and a huge portion of the server.

But being young doesn’t give you a free pass to do whatever you want and then complain about the consequences. You don’t get to just run a red light and kill kids crossing the road and claim innocence because you are a new driver. Because you are young, because you were distracted, because you were just trying to change the song and didn’t see them, because you didn't mean to. You are still responsible for killing people.

And if you don't want to be responsible, if you want to be treated like a child, then stay a child. But as a child you are not considered mature enough to know what is right from wrong, which is where guidance from guardians comes in. Children (really generally speaking), don’t know better, which is why they get grounded, spanked, their mouths washed out with soap, forced to write lines, get things taken away, time out, scolding… etc - punished. They are not free and independent to do what they like. Now obviously, when it comes to the dsmp there are really no such guardians or parents in charge of the minors, but the point still stands, if you do not understand your actions are wrong then someone should teach you and (whether you or not you agree with that) that is often through punishment.

Under that guise, c!Dream taking away c!Tommy’s discs for starting wars and breaking the rules and murdering him, is a form of parenting. (You can argue with whether you consider it good parenting… but that's not really the point). Even further, Exile then could be considered a more extreme form of time out and/or grounding, which is extreme because the violations are extreme. If you steal a cookie you are forced to go to your room for a bit, if you burn down the king’s house then you get exiled from the land. In Exile, he is forced to lose items which could be considered revoking privileges and getting his belongings taken away (like if your parents ever took your phone for a week). Hell, even hitting him with the axe could be seen as a super extreme spanking for not complying with his punishment. Now am I staying that makes it justified? Am I saying those were ok things to happen? Am I saying c!Tommy deserved being treated like that? No. Not really, I am just simply pointing out that in a world where the crime isn’t spray painting a building but burning said building down in an act of terrorism it almost makes sense in a twisted way that the punishments are more severe to fit the infraction.

(I would also like to point out that c!Phil has a moment with c!Tommy where he forced him to smelt stone and then destroy it over and over again and isn’t that kinda what c!Dream was doing in Exile?… just saying, not to say the behavior is right, just something I noticed and thought was interesting.) And the reason why the act of losing items is important is because a huge part of his character arc is surrounded by the value of objects and treating people like he treats objects. It was a big moment of deliberation for him to give up the discs for c!Tubbo’s life. Do you even realize how screwed up that is? A person over an object. But the thing is, somehow in c!Tommy’s mind those two things were synonymous, he was never there for c!Tubbo when c!Tubbo needed someone to have his back. When c!Tubbo goes to get revenge for his missing child and dead husband, he teams up with his literal worst enemies the people who took his canonical lives. Where was c!Tommy?… But whenever c!Tommy needed c!Tubbo to go after c!Dream or support him even with the things c!Tubbo disagreed with, he’s there. Honestly, he’s less of a best friend and more of a sword. The dsmp completes c!Tommy’s character arc by him giving up the discs for c!Tubbo’s life and to for once listen to c!Dream. His character arc, put very very simply, was valuing and treating people as people instead of things.

So the - it’s understandable, it’s less bad than what c!Dream did because he’s young and didn’t know better - is just not reasonable to me. Exile being used as justification isn’t really valid either. Ok so for a week, yea he was abused, he lost his things, people didn’t visit him, sure some were tricked into not visiting him, c!Dream took all of his items over and over, c!Dream hurt him when he did not comply, sure c!Tommy was suicidal as a result. But ya know, when no one else could be bothered to show up, c!Dream came by everyday. Plus abuse on the server is like scuffed so I hardly hold Exile as a gold standard for trauma like y’all I don’t know if I need to make a complication of how many times on the dsmp people hit each other with axes and hurt eachother or force eachother to comply or something. Or if I need to make a list of everytime c!Tommy has done worse even before Exile, but yeeeesh. Like don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying Exile was deserved, I don’t think anyone deserves abuse. Period. But on the scale of the dsmp and considering how many people he hurt and the circumstances that got him there, I find it hard to feel for him. And that’s coming from someone who (before medication) used to have panic attacks multiple times a week, who has been bullied, who has been isolated, who has been abandoned and betrayed by my best friends, who has been so so lonely, who has been suicidal, and who was a nasty person as a result of being hurt. So I get it, I really do. But to me it doesn’t really matter much, it doesn’t make him the hero, or redeemed, or innocence, or any more likable, especially when so many other characters on the dsmp have similar instances on their arcs.

And if we want to compare, c!Tommy’s ‘crimes’ to c!Dream’s because he’s ‘just as bad,’ the thing is, I’m not so sure that’s true, for many reasons. One of which is that c!Dream has really only ever reacted. Over and over he gets pushed into reacting, but usually he gives people a way out and he tries to do the better thing at first, but eventually after failing he turns towards the latter. While on the other hand, c!Tommy continues to provoke, over and over and over. Look no further than the finale where he shows up to the prison to assassinate c!Dream, after c!Dream literally hasn’t done anything to him since the prison break (unless you count c!Tommy and c!Wilbur breaking in… which again - provoke). And there really is no such transformation for c!Tommy, he doesn’t start off trying to do the right thing at all, which also brings us to motivation… which continues to baffle me, what is c!Tommy’s motivation? Because if it’s truly to have a home and be happy with his friends then why does he constantly do things that would jeopardize that?

So, you want me to feel bad for and root for someone - who often worked against their own stated motivation, who did drugs, tortured people, started wars, killed, enslaved, destroyed, used, stole, was sexist, xenophobic, disrespectful and constantly talked over people, who didn’t even have his friend’s back more importantly his best friend’s, c!Tubbo’s, back who continued to risk his life for c!Tommy’s schemes - because what? He is a minor? Because he was abused and suicidal after facing the consquences of his own actions? Because we get his pov? Because he declared himself the hero? Because c!Dream personally targeted him for no reason - because he’s so innocent and was no threat to c!Dream… after he literally KILLED HIM multiple times with much less armor, then with no armor at all (in one of the first streams)? …..…. Like heh?

Ah nah you’re so right… c!Dream definitely deserved prison - He killed c!Tommy after all!… in a war, where he was given a chance to surrender or face no mercy… in a fair dual, where he set the terms… in prison, where he provoked c!Dream, killed the cat c!Dream admitted to caring about all after c!Dream had been no doubt going insane from being isolated in prison for months already… I mean… come on, in no way do I see any of those as specifically targeting c!Tommy (don’t even get me started on the finale where he mentions Spirit just to piss c!Dream off).

And ya know, after saying all of that, I would even go as far as to say that c!Tommy is not a hero, nor even an anti-hero, since he is neither selfless, noble or full of goodness, which are some of the more fundamental qualities. In fact, Theseus, who c!Techno calls c!Tommy, is a Greek hero who in the beginning becomes infamous because he slays many savage murderers and monsters on his way to Athens. But I ask you, what savagery has c!Tommy stopped? What noble feats has he done for the sake of the safety of people?… He may be a protagonist, but honestly I don’t think he qualifies as a hero. Sure, both c!Dream and c!Techno’s reference Theseus, but they are really more highlighting the end of his life. Overall, I don’t think hero (even a flawed Greek one) is an adequate description for him. Perhaps anti-villain would be more fitting, a villain with some heroic traits?… I mean his most heroic moments are probably the duel, willing to fight in doomsday with or without help, and willing to be nuked, but like eh… the first two were over a piece of land, a country. It wasn’t about protecting people. I mean in both of those he was part of provoking the conflict in the first place, so is it heroic to help in a conflict that you helped cause? And in the last one, I mean it is the end of his arc so anti-villain technically still works for having a good selfless heroic moment at the end ;) ……

#ummm… welp don’t y’all just love me going off on Tommy XD lol… this was fun… >:) that boy is a menace lol #c!tommy #and the fact that cc!Tommy made a comment when watching the lore with Technodad about him thinking he was a good guy at the time #but now on retrospect him seeing that that wasn’t really the case is 10/10… #dsmp analysis #umm if I didn’t mention a point here it is probably in another post about Tommy like the one I posted recently… #c!dream #c!dream and c!tommy #did someone order an essay? #welp consider it delivered hope you enjoyed it #this is fine #dsmp #dream smp #dreblr #c!discduo #dsmpblr #c!tommyinnit #c!clingyduo #dsmp exile arc #dsmp finale #c!tubbo #ya know if Tommy has problems with treating people as items … that really is getting into anti social personality disorder… #probably a narcissist honestly…. yea that would probably be right… huh…. #thanks to everyone who took the time read this <3 <3 <3 #did I bash tommy enough?…oooof… call a medic lol XD

[itshoneywhatever]

My AO3 Works

Top Gun: Maverick — Hangster

You’re a Bad Habit… Series - 2 Works / Complete / Omegaverse, Mpreg, Explicit

You’re a Bad Habit I Can’t Shake Off (but I still want more): They don't date, they are not even friends, what they have is similar to a bad habit you want to quit. And now they have to figure out how to be parents together.

In Need of Some Life-Affirming Touches: They don't date, they are not even friends, what they have is similar to a bad habit you want to quit. Now, in the face of uncertainty, boy do they love getting high on each other.

Other TG:M Works

How Long Does It Take? — One Shot / Past Mpreg

A passionate goodbye leads to long lasting consequences for Jake.

Formula 1 — Lestappen

I was looking for comfort (and I found you) — One Shot / Omegaverse

Charles wakes up feeling off, craving the comfort of his nest but not having the luxury to lay in it for the day, not when it’s a race weekend. When he finally is able to relax, he ends up finding more than the confort he was looking for.

A Happy Turn of Events — One Shot / Omegaverse

He never would have thought that stupidly standing up to Max so he wouldn’t start a fight with Charles’ teammate would lead to the omega being as I’m

MCU — Stony

Divided We Fall, Together We Stand ���— Complete / Omegaverse, Mpreg, Explicit

Tony is left to deal with the aftermath of everything.

Peaky Blinders — Sholomons

Deals Series — 14 Works / Complete / Omegaverse, Mpreg, Explicit

Deals Have Consequences: Tommy needed to ensure Alfie's loyalty no matter what. He didn't expect the extent of the consequences of his actions.

Closing the Deal: Two weeks have passed since they signed the contract. It's time to close the deal and enjoy its perks.

A New Deal is Made: No matter what they are doing, no matter the situation, Tommy is first and foremost a businessman.

The Offer: Their lives through the years since they met up until the moment they decided to live together, told by one Alfie Solomons.

The Fine Print: All things considered, Alfie should probably know better about de importance of reading the fine print whenever he signs a contract.

Changes: With everything that has been going on, Tommy can't help to ponder in all the changes that have taken place in the last few months. And in the ones that are about to come.

Getting to Know You: Jealousy makes Alfie angry. Tommy doesn't have time for his bullshit. So they are going to talk like the fucking adults that they are.

Turn of Events: Alfie has to go to London. Tommy goes along. Things don’t go as planned.

The Rest of Their Lives: Bedrest is driving Tommy insane, reading isn't enough, writting isn't enough to keep him distracted; he's spending too much time on his head and some uncomfortable doubts are making their ways to his mind. All he wants is for the babies to be here already so he can walk again, and for Alfie to pay him a little more attention.

Loyalty: Cyril is very grateful for the life he has been give, that's why he makes his mission in life to protect the one who he loves -and love him- the most. (Or: A Story where Cyril prefers the Shelby boys more.)

Together: It's been a month since the twins arrived in a rather dramatic way, and this story is about how Tommy and Alfie are managing how to raise three kids and find time for them as a couple.

Another Type of Contract: “This holiday season, Tommy, I offer you another type of contract.”

One Last Deal: Tommy has a lot on his mind — kids, husband, the company he has to run. Having to worry about his fuckin' cousin lurking around, shouldn't be one of them. It's time to make a decision and negotiate one last deal.

Headcanons — Deals Series: A collection of headcan on requests about Tommy, Alfie and their kids. All set in the Deals series.

Other PB Works

Easy to Manipulate — One Shot

There’s one sure way to make Alfie agree to whatever Tommy asks, and Tommy isn’t afraid to use it.

The Model & The Baker — One Shot / Based on Prompt

It was impossible, he knows, for Tommy to still want him. He knows there’s no chance for them to get back together, and it’s all his fault. Ada seems to thinks otherwise.

Surprise! — One Shot / Based on Prompt

When he saw her there, he realized he couldn't just leave her to her own devices. So, he took her home.

Wish You Were Mine — One Shot / Based on Prompt

I want to blame you, but we both know I hurt myself with my own expectations.

From a One Night Stand to Business Partners… — One Shot / Explicit

Before a big meeting in the morning, Tommy decides to go out the night before to get a feel of the city.

#my fics #my masterlist #top gun: maverick #hangster #sereshaw #icemav #mcu #stony #steve rogers x tony stark #peaky blinders #sholomons #tofie #tommy shelby x afie solomons #honeywhatever works

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

Well about the perception of Volo vs Kamado thing, and why more people don’t hate Volo, I have my own reflections (pretty privilege is absolutely a factor tho let’s be real 😂)

Everyone growing up has at least one story of an adult being super unfair to you, even though you were doing everything right. Their own biases and experiences could be understood later once you were older and calmer reflecting back on the incident, like a teacher who snapped at you maybe had a super long day of wrangling hundreds of children. But we never forget how it feels in that moment to have those who should be guiding us be unfair and seemingly unreasonable. So naturally that’s gonna hurt when you get kamado being paranoid.

Volo on the other hand is just absolutely delightful I’m sorry maybe if Kamado put on a silly outfit and hair for his boss battle instead of plate mail he’d have more art. Like you said Volos betrayal is one and done really, he acts like a theater kid and then dips. You have to keep seeing kamado being in charge in the game after his blunders for a while which can rub people the wrong way. (Also this is maybe just me but I never trusted Volo just like I never trusted Cynthia as a kid, and finding out he was evil was a great moment of vindication I CANT be the only one who experienced this)

TLDR we see unfairness way more than we see someone betray us while making their hair like a god horse

well, you heard them, kamado. time to go get the jester outfit. cmon chop chop it's to redeem your image

yeah, the point abt getting burned by adults in authority is also very fair. most of us were not scarred for life by theater kid antics lol. the other thing abt it is that often those same adults never really face any consequences. you were always just expected to move on, suck it up etc. cause that's life as a kid right. sometimes ppl will use their power over you just to flex their limited authority, or to vent whatever's going on in their home life, and this doesn't really stop when you grow up it's just that when you're a kid basically every adult has that authority position. so it's just expected that there's nothing you can do. i mean unless you decide to be the karmic force of justice in your own life by being the most stubborn bitch of a child to walk the earth. not that i would know anything about that cough

uh anyway. the thing is the thing btwn you and kamado isn't about about child vs adult. you're more or less considered an adult yourself by jubilife, albeit a rather young and more importantly low ranking one. like we've said (a million times already lol) kamado's not doing it just to grasp at a sense of control, he's reacting to what he perceives as a very real threat to his village (and also because the writers clocked him in the face with the idiot ball for plot advancement reasons lbr).

and the thing is kamado DOES, kind of, face consequences and own up to his mistakes by the end of the game. also after the red sky event he's like, REALLY nice to you lol. not just briefly either! imo you can tell that he sincerely respects you and regrets his actions in the red sky. go look at his late game quotes-

"Perhaps you are a divine being yourself, sent to bring us gifts from above... "I know I've no right to say this... But we are truly fortunate to have been able to count you among the Survey Corps' ranks. If you had not joined us, we would have fallen on Mount Coronet. We would have lost our home. We would have lost our future." "I'm grateful to you for showing me what a heartening presence Pokémon can be. We must spar again sometime!" "<player>, forgive me for taking so much of your time [telling you about the Galaxy name.] Please accept this as a sort of apology."

like he's trying to make up for the way they were treated earlier and give them the proper treatment they're owed for all their help.

idk i don't have a good way to conclude this i guess. i just think he's a cool character

#the nemesis speaks #the nemesis answers #trudivination #pla analysis #i should really be tagging these kamado posts #but with what ugh #kamado apologist hours #that's what i tagged a previous one with i think. sure good nuff #i say the idiot ball thing bc like #kamado's PERCEPTION was semi reasonable but his ACTIONS kind of weren't #but it's also kind of unreasonable for such a seemingly competent person to get that straw-graspy that fast #like they purely did his character dirty bc it was the easiest way to get you to follow volo to cogita's house #imo at least. you (general you) may disagree. there's space to make an argument there

[thebluestbluewords]

Welcome to the ool (please keep the p out of it)

+

“I’m right and you know it,” Mal crows, pushing her way through the crowd of kids and tourists in the shallows of the wave pool. “I’ll get the boys to back me up on this one! Everyone does it!” 

“Just because everyone does it doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do, babe.” Evie says, but she’s laughing and letting Mal pull her along easily by the hand, and there’s warm sun and the promise of cotton candy in Mal’s immediate future, and things are….not the worst right now. 

Mal kicks a spray of water at a toddler’s face on her way by, just because she can. “I think everyone does it,” she says loudly, reveling in the dirty look the kid’s adult gives her. “And the only difference between honest people like me and cowards like you is that I’m not afraid to admit it.” 

Evie hums, and taps her finger twice against Mal’s wrist. Two taps means dodge left, so Mal throws herself sideways practically before the instruction registers. She clamps down hard on Evie’s hand, hopefully pulling them both out of harm’s way, away from whatever danger Evie saw while Mal was distracted with her correct opinions about pissing in swimming pools. 

Unfortunately, the impossible weight of having all of the correct opinions is too heavy for one teenage to bear, and Mal’s dodge throws her directly into one of the water geysers.

Evie cackles. 

Mal comes up sputtering with a face full of water. There’s water in her nose, which burns, and in her mouth, which is probably gross. 

She could make it grosser. 

Evie bats away the halfhearted mouthful of water Mal spits at her. “Rude. Don’t be a brat.” 

“I’ll be whatever I want.” Mal says, and scoops her face back into the geyser for another mouthful. 

“Don’t spit piss water at me!” Evie shrieks, batting the second, much more forest up stream out of her face. “I don’t know where that’s been!” 

“You’re the one who pushed me into it!” 

“Because I’m right and it’s disgusting and you need to suffer for your crimes!” 

Ouch. “I’ve never done a crime in my life,” Mal says, swallowing the remainder of her mouthful before she can consider the potential consequences of her actions. “And I’m hurt that you would imply such a thing. I’m actually an innocent child, and you dragged me into a fountain like a common criminal.” 

“Technically, you dragged me.” Evie points out, waving her arm, where there are indeed droplets of water clinging to her warm, sun-kissed skin. 

“Point,” Mal agrees. “But only because you took advantage of my survival instincts to make me do it. So really it’s not my fault, and we should steal a bucket to dump the disgusting baby piss water on the boys, right?” 

“This is why I love you, babe.” Evie says. “You come up with all the best evil plans.”

#my fic #descendants #descendants fic #mal bertha #evie grimhilde #malvie #this is more of the road trip fic!! The water park is not an adventure they’re going to repeat for a multitude of reasons #one of which is the pee-to-water ratio #another of which is the inevitable heatstroke that will come later #i also think it would be very funny for Mal to get horrifying sunburn from this incident so maybe I’ll add that in later

[hbyrde36]

Caught in the Undertow

Chapter 4: Nightmares

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 AO3

*TW* suicidal thoughts/ideation etc.

*EDDIE*

Eddie lays there staring at the wall for a long time after Steve leaves. He feels like a hollow shell, drained and numb. Like a spectator in his own body, everything is just a little…unreal. He tries to playback the events of the evening in his mind and finds more than a few blurry spots but, he remembers enough to know he fucked up. He let the ugly parts of himself show a little too much and in front of far too many people.

And Steve – He had been right there, in the bathroom. Eddie’s never let anyone see him like that before. He won’t be able to brush it under the rug this time. Wayne knew he got into moods of course, as did some of his friends. No one could hide 24/7 but no one’s ever seen…that.

He had completely broken down on that floor, just...chest torn wide open and Steve had seen it, all of it. Eddie was caught between embarrassment for his actions and disappointment that he couldn’t go through with -it- and now he was going to have to deal with the consequences. He should never have come here and he definitely shouldn’t have drunk so much.

At some point in his musings a soft knock comes at the door. He ignores it, not up to facing Steve again tonight. But then someone is talking.

“Ed? It's Wayne, I’m gonna come in alright?” He doesn’t wait for a response before opening the door and taking a seat on the edge of the bed. Eddie rolls over and looks up at his uncle. Part of him wants to talk, to explain, make an excuse, or something but his mouth won’t move. He can’t make the words come.

Wayne seems to be having trouble with his words too.

“I…Steve called, he was worried about…what…”

Wayne closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before trying again.

“Son, I gotta be honest. I’m scared out of my mind right now. I knew you were struggling but…I had no idea. I can’t lose you, I won’t.” Wayne says finally, voice trembling.

Seeing the kind of pain, he’s putting his uncle through is a little too much, and cracks start to form in armor of numbness he’s been wearing since Steve asked him drop the knife. Eddie’s vision blurs as silent tears start rolling down his face, he still can’t bring himself to speak.

It shouldn’t matter really but Eddie is almost relieved to realize that his uncle still thinks this is all to do with what happened over spring break. He thinks it’s whatever happened to him that’s traumatized him, sent him spiraling. Wayne doesn’t realize Eddie has always been this way. He decides it’s a good thing, thinks his uncle might blame himself for missing it all these years otherwise, as if Eddie hadn’t done everything possible to make sure no one knew how he truly felt inside, ever.

Wayne takes one of Eddie’s hands in both of his. “I’m starting back at work tomorrow and there’s no way around it. Steve’s offered to have you stay with him for a while so you won’t have to be alone.”

Eddie finally finds his voice although it is lacking its usual fire.

“I don’t need a babysitter.”

Wayne sighs, “You’re an adult and I can’t force you to do anything but, I am asking, begging, you to stay here with Steve. I told you once back in the hospital, you need people around you who get it. People who know what you’ve been through and – Frankly, I think that boy needs you every bit as much as you need him.”

Eddie scoffs.

“Just give it a chance. He seems to care about you a great deal. Talk to him, or hell – any of your other friends, it doesn’t matter who but, you have to start talking to someone.”

Wayne bends down, pressing a kiss to his forehead before quickly leaving the room. He couldn’t help but notice that the man had been shaking.

The door’s been left ajar and Eddie can see Steve nervously hovering out in the hall. “I’m gonna go to bed, do you um…need anything?” Steve asks, softly.

Steve sounds guarded, and sad. Eddie knows it’s his fault but he’s very much not ready to face those feelings so he latches back on to his favorite safety net – anger.

“I’ll stay here if that’s what my uncle wants, fine. But that doesn't mean I have to like it and it doesn’t mean I’m going to talk to you. Got it?”

“Yea. I got it.”

“What’s any of this matter to you anyway, what do you get out of this?”

Steve just shakes his head. Maybe he’s had enough for one night too.

“Good night, Eddie” he murmurs quietly, shutting the door.

-

For three days Steve let it go. He didn’t try to talk to him and he never knocked on the door. He left food, water, soda, all kinds of things outside his door several times a day. The one time they did manage to run into each other in the hallway going to and from the bathroom, Steve had kept his eyes cast down and all but sprinted away from him.

The morning after that first night, Eddie found a familiar bag sitting in the corner of his room. Wayne must have brought it, he hadn’t even noticed. It was filled to the brim with his comfiest clothes, his Walkman with an assortment of tapes, and a few of his favorite books. He hastily changed his clothes, having still been wearing jeans from the night before, and settled back into bed with his things. He was still feeling a little raw and out of it but the familiar music and stories helped to ground him.

The days are long. He hasn’t been sober for more than a few hours at the time since the hospital. The first day was hell, off and on at least. After that, it’s not so bad if he’s honest and he actually starts to feel the thick fog of badwrongbigsad start to lift.

-

For three nights Eddie listens from across the hall as Steve screams himself awake. Nightmares.

Eddie has had his fair share of bad dreams, though it happened more when he was a child than it did now. Weed and alcohol usually take care of it.

He figures this must be pretty normal for Steve after his several rounds with the upside-down. He’s probably used to this. That’s how Eddie justifies it anyway, doing nothing more than sitting in his bed and listening to it happen.

Something's different on the third night. This time Eddie is already awake when the screaming starts. He had slept most of the afternoon away so of course he was now wide awake at 3am, reading The Hobbit for the millionth time.

Unlike the previous nights, Steve's screams continue to build and build. Eddie is amazed that he hasn't woken himself up yet from the sheer volume. His heart jumps into his throat, however, when he hears Steve call out his name at the end of a choked off sob. 

He’s out of bed and across the hall before realizing he’d moved. He finds himself standing outside Steve's door, fist raised to knock and he freezes.

The screaming had stopped but now he can hear Steve crying. Is he awake? Is he okay? Was he awake when he said Eddie’s name, or was that park of the nightmare? A creak and a thud warn Eddie that the other boy must be getting out of bed and he panics, scrambling to get back into his own room before he can get caught lurking in the hall.

Back inside, Eddie listens at the door. Eventually, light footsteps approach but much like he himself did a minute ago, Steve walks away without knocking.

The other nights Steve had stayed in his room, Eddie assumed he’d just gone back to sleep. He wonders what was so different about this nightmare that had Steve fleeing downstairs.

Reality washes over him like a bucket of cold water and, oh god. What was he thinking, what has he been doing? Steve, this poor guy, who clearly has his own problems and barely sleeps, has just been trying to help him, to be his friend. All at once can see just how much of an asshole he’s been.

But it wasn’t all at once, was it? Not really. If he’s honest, Eddie's feelings towards Steve had been gradually softening. Day by day, hour by hour. Maybe he’s just finally reached the end of his longest-ever depressive episode. Maybe he didn’t like the way Steve sort of flinched away from him that one time they saw each other. Maybe it broke him a little to hear Steve cry out his name like that.

Whatever the reason, he no longer feels quite so trapped in the darkness. It’s time. He needs to fix this, wants to. He owes Steve an apology at the very least. He can try to explain that he’s just kind of fucked in the head, and Steve hadn’t done anything wrong. Who knows, maybe Wayne is right. He will try to open up to Steve, to trust him. In the morning, he promises himself. He’ll talk to Steve in the morning.

*STEVE*

“He hasn’t left the room Robin, it’s been almost 24 hours since Wayne left and he hasn’t come out at all” Steve whisper-shouts into the phone from where he’s sitting cross-legged on the kitchen floor.

“I’m sure he just needs some time, that was a pretty ugly scene last night. Did he ever take the food you left out?”

“Yea actually, I checked again before calling you and it’s gone. so at least he’s eating I guess.”

Robin didn’t know the half of how ugly it had gotten. He called her that night, after Eddie’s uncle left, fully intending to spill his guts about everything that had happened in the short time since she and the others had left. In the end though, he couldn’t do it. It felt – wrong to share something so big and sensitive without Eddie’s permission. He felt bad enough that he had basically forced his way into the room, though he’s glad he did.

He did tell her that Eddie would be staying with him for a while. He just skirted the truth a little about the why. He told her Wayne was concerned about Eddie being alone at the trailer because of how many people still thought he was guilty and he was worried about what people might do without a witness to interfere, now that he was back at work.

Honestly, it was a valid concern so it didn’t even feel like a lie. He’s not sure Robin bought it, after all, she had heard what Eddie shouted in the kitchen, but she didn’t press him about it.

“You know, we never really talked about it,” Robin ventured.

“About what?” Steve asked, puzzled.

“Why you couldn’t let him go, why you fought so hard to save him that night. Don’t get me wrong Steve, I'm so glad that you did, you saved his life but…”

“He’s our friend Robin, I would have done the same for anyone. He got thrown into this thing with no warning and…he was so brave. Dustin is alive because of him.”

“I know honey and I get that but, what about after? You spent almost as much time in that hospital as he did even after he refused to see any of us. You made friends with his uncle, and now this?”

“I just want to help him Rob, it’s not a big deal.”

“You know you can talk to me about anything and I'd never judge. I love you, dingus. Nothing could ever change that.”

“I love you too, but I promise you there's nothing to talk about.”

Deep down Steve knows what she’s getting at, he’s not as dumb as people like to think. On the surface though, he hasn’t even begun to let himself think about it. He doesn’t know why every day it had felt like he couldn't breathe until Wayne would call him with an update on Eddie’s condition. He hasn’t let himself consider what it means that, in the quiet moments, all he can think about is the boy upstairs.

Robin must decide not to push, and Steve is grateful for it. Instead, she goes off on a twenty-minute tangent about her last interaction with Vickie. The rambling is so normal, so Robin, that by the time they hang up he feels almost relaxed.

-

Steve is exhausted. He’d started having nightmares right after that first fight with the Demogorgon in ’83 and they had never really stopped. They got less intense over time and eventually he’d even get a break for a few days at a time. That is, until the next fight came, and then he’d have to start the whole process over again. 

The past two nights had been rough. The days weren’t much better as he was equal parts worried about Eddie and frustrated at having to walk on eggshells in his own house.

No, that wasn’t fair. Eddie is having a rough time and Steve just needs to be patient. He’ll talk when he’s ready. Or not. At least this way he knows the guy is alive.

-

Steve is running, full out. He’s not sure how he knows that something is wrong, he just knows he needs to keep running, he has to make it in time. Finally, in the distance, he can see them. A giant swarm of those fucking bats. Some are just hovering but many of them are focused on attacking a lone figure on the ground. Eddie. Steve doubles his efforts but no matter how hard he pushes himself it’s like he’s running barefoot through molasses. He’s close enough to see it when Eddie drops to the ground. His arms and legs seemingly pinned to the ground, as his body is ravaged by those goddamn monsters. Steve starts screaming at the top of his lungs, hoping to draw the attention of the bats.

There’s something in the back of his mind telling him no, this is wrong. That’s not how it happened; you weren’t there for this part. Distantly, he realizes he’s dreaming. It’s only a nightmare. None of those facts do anything to lessen his terror.

By the time he reaches Eddie’s side, the bats have dropped. Eddie is covered in blood head to toe, lifeless eyes pointed skyward. Steve knows he’s gone but he still shakes him by the shoulders, Eddie's name falling from his lips on the end of the sob. He doesn't wake up. He’s gone, Steve was too late. The bats have completely torn out his throat, this time no amount of CPR will save him.

Steve wakes, gasping for breath and still sobbing. His body is coated in a layer of cold sweat and his face is damp. He clamps a hand over his own mouth to stifle the sound and hopes he didn’t disturb his housemate.

He throws the covers off and all but falls out of the bed, landing on the carpet on all fours. He hates that particular nightmare the most, and he’s been having it a lot lately. He won’t be able to close his eyes again without seeing Eddie’s bloody and lifeless face.

Knowing he won’t be going back to sleep tonight, Steve pulls a pair of sweatpants up over his boxers and grabs a t-shirt before venturing out into the hall. He pauses for a moment at the door to the guest room. He would feel a lot better if he could see Eddie alive, just for a moment, with his own eyes. Honestly at this point he would settle for hearing a light snore from within the room, but the house remains utterly silent.

He can’t bring himself to knock. Sighing, he slips away down the stairs and hopes that a few hours of TV will be enough of a distraction.

-

Four hours. Steve has been sitting on the couch staring at the TV for four hours and he hasn’t heard a single word anyone on the screen has said. Not much of a distraction, as it turns out.

His mind can’t stop running over every moment he has spent in Eddie’s orbit. He  cycles through the events of spring break, the hospital, the other night, and finally the nightmare. Over and over again. Relentless.

It’s got him so worked up that he can feel a migraine coming on. There's a certain stiffness to his neck and the telltale throb behind his eyes. That lack of sleep probably hasn’t helped either but he’s choosing to blame it Eddie for now.

He’s frustrated, angry even. At Eddie, at this whole situation really. Is he really going to just hole up in that room forever? It’s not just about himself either, whatever Eddie is going through, what he’s doing is affecting the kids too. They miss their friend. Steve didn’t really know Eddie before, he’d get over it. Probably. But Dustin will be devastated if he doesn’t come around soon.

Everyone keeps telling him to give Eddie time. Even Steve gave the same advice to the kids. He’s only been here a few days, sure, but he’s been out of the hospital for weeks. He’s had plenty of time and all he’s done with it is push everyone further and further away.

Fuck it.

Steve storms up the stairs, not bothering to keep his steps light. He knocks harshly on Eddie’s door, toe tapping on the floor with impatience as he waits.

When Eddie finally opens the door, it’s clear that he’d been asleep. He squints into the dim light of the hallway and stifles a yawn.

“Steve?”

He barges into the room, all but pushing Eddie out of the way. He paces back and forth in front of the bed, angrily raking a hand through his hair. Eddie just watches him, eyes wide and confused.

Eventually Steve starts to talk. At first, it’s a babbling incoherent mess of unfinished sentences.

“Where do you get off…”

“Do you think you’re the first person to ever…”

“I can’t believe you…”

Realizing that he’s making no sense, Steve stops walking, takes a deep breath, and tries to swallow down a little bit of the feeling that’s bubbling up in his chest.

“I know you’re having a really hard time right now, I get that, okay? But it’s not okay for you to just close yourself off from everyone who cares about you.”

“Steve, wait. I…” Eddie tries to interject but Steve is having none of it.

“No! I'm not done. Dude, do you think you’re the only person in the world who gets depressed? The only one who’s thought about ending it? Fuck, sometimes the only reason I can find to get myself out of bed in the morning is for the slim chance that the kids could need me. And now that it’s over, this upside-down shit? God, what are they gonna need me for now, huh? A ride every once in a while, a house to hang out at? They’re not kids anymore, pretty soon they’re gonna stop calling. Even now, sometimes I think I could disappear and the only person who’d care is Robin, and she’d get over it. I mean, you can’t just…”

Steve stops, realizing that he’s lost the thread at some point. This isn’t quite what he had planned to say but the throbbing in his head is starting to get worse and he thinks he might throw up.

He groans, lurching forward as the world around him sways. He braces for the fall but it never comes. Instead, warm, strong arms wrap around his waist and guide him to sit down on the bed. Eddie had caught him.

“Woah there big boy, let's sit you down before you hurt yourself.”

Steve ignores the way it feels to hear Eddie call him that again. He tries instead to resume his speech, as off the rails as it had been, it’s important to him that Eddie understands…

He opens his mouth to speak but his breath catches in his throat as Eddie raises a hand to gently cradle his cheek.

“It’s okay Steve, just relax for a minute.”

“But…”

“I get it. okay? I’ve been selfish, and a real dick. I mean, I think at some point we’re gonna have to talk about some of the things you just said but… Listen, man. I owe you an apology. I know it doesn’t exactly make sense but I've been SO mad at you this whole time. I know that’s not right, you did nothing wrong and I'm so, so sorry for how I've been acting.”

Eddie sighs, pulling his hand away from Steve to wrap both arms around himself. Steve immediately misses the contact but pushes the thought away. This conversation they’re having is too important.

“Why were you so angry at me Eddie?”

Eddie fixes him with a look that says, I think you know.

“I know but… I just want to understand.”

“Please don’t make me say it again.” Eddie whispers.

The timing couldn’t be worse as another wave of pain and nausea hits Steve. He knows he doesn’t have long before he’ll be all but useless. Eddie looks him over with concern.

“Sorry, I get these really bad migraines. Too many shots to the head over the years, I guess.”

“Jesus…what do you usually do for them, do you need to lay down?”

“Yea but it’s just…you’re finally talking to me and –”

“Steve, I promise you I will still talk to you when you’re feeling better, okay? We’re just pressing pause for a bit. Now, tell me what I can do to help.”

Eddie helps him back to his room and tucks him into bed. At Steve’s direction he fetches a cold pack and pain meds from the kitchen, along with a glass of water and some dry toast.

He does it all without complaint and he’s actually really sweet about it all. Once he has fetched everything Steve needs, he expects Eddie to leave. He always feels a little vulnerable during these attacks and he’d rather not be alone, but he doesn’t know how to ask him to stay.

Somehow, Eddie seems to sense it and instead of leaving he shuts the door, flips off the light, and gently crawls onto the bed next to Steve, sitting himself up against the headboard. All he can do is smile, and hope that Eddie knows that it means - thank you.

Steve closes his eyes, hoping that at some point sleep will suck him under. For him, sleep has always been the easiest way through these headaches. It startles him a little when he feels hesitant fingers in his hair. The touch is light, soft. It feels amazing and Steve makes what he hopes sound like appreciative noises. Eddie’s movements become a little surer after that and Steve thinks he must have hit the mark.

Thirty minutes later the painkillers have finally provided a little relief and Steve finds himself nodding off into a mercifully dreamless sleep.

-

Steve wakes to an empty bed. A glance at the clock tells him it’s early afternoon, he’s been asleep for hours. For a minute he thinks he might have dreamed the whole interaction with Eddie from this morning but then he spots a note sitting on the desk next to the medicine bottle.

Take another dose of meds before you come downstairs, it’ll help. – E

Steve chest warms. He finds it incredibly adorable that Eddie signed the note even though they're the only two people in the house. Who else would it be from?

The migraine is mostly gone and he's feeling much better but still, he takes the advice and downs a few of the pills before padding downstairs.

The sight that greets him is not something he could have ever imagined. The radio is playing softly, some song Steve doesn’t recognize and Eddie Munson is dancing around his kitchen.

Not only that but he seems to be cooking something and it smells amazing.

Eddie must catch sight of him out of the corner of his eye. He shrieks, jumping back with a hand pressed to his chest. “Jesus Christ! You could give a guy a heart attack sneaking up on him like that!”

Steve chuckles, grinning so wide it’s almost painful.

Eddie narrows his eyes but he’s smiling too. “How long have you been creeping, Harrington?”

“Sorry! I just got here a second ago so I didn’t see much I swear.”

“Sure, you didn't - you little voyeur. So…how are we feeling?”

“Much better, thanks.”

“Good, that’s great! You hungry at all? I hope you don’t mind, I took the liberty of throwing something together for us. I figured it was the least I could do. Also, I maybe got a little bored after you fell asleep.”

“I’m starving actually and whatever that is smells incredible. Thank you for doing all this.”

Eddie shakes his head. “Don’t thank me, man. You’ve been taking care of me for days, as much as I’d let you anyway. I’m just returning the favor.”

Steve pulls out a couple plates and Eddie loads them both up. They take their food through to the living room and settle in to eat side by side on the couch while something plays low on the tv. The food turns out to be some kind of spicy pasta dish with chicken, it’s absolutely delicious and he tells Eddie as much.

Eddie shrugs off the compliment with a hint of shyness. It’s not something he’s used to seeing on the guy. “Wayne’s been working night for years, it was either learn to cook or resign myself to a lifetime of shitty frozen dinners.”

Steve purposely keeps the talk light while they finish up the meal but as they both set down their empty plates, he can’t think of a good way to transition to the more serious talk they need to have. The silence stretches on a little too long as he flounders for what to say.

Eddie once again seems to know what Steve is thinking without him having to say. Some day he’ll have to ask him if he’s just that good at reading people or if he is, in fact, a mind reader.

“Alright, I promised I’d talk when you were feeling better. So, here goes nothing…”

“This… isn’t anything new for me. I think I’ve always been like this. Once, when I was a kid, my dad had gotten picked up for some drug charge or another and my mom was nowhere to be found so I ended up in a group home for a little while. I think I was about ten. I vividly remember lying in bed at night and staring up at the ceiling just begging god, or whatever greater power might be out there, to take me. Just let me die in my sleep. I don’t even really believe in all that stuff, it’s not like we were a church going family but damned if I didn’t pray for it anyway. It wasn’t even a particularly bad place, I’d seen worse. I was just in so much…pain. I felt wrong and so alone and I just wanted it all to stop. I’m sorry I’m sure that makes me sound crazy.”

Steve waves the idea off. “There’s nothing wrong with a little crazy. I’m sorry you felt that way, that you still feel that way. Have you ever thought about, you know, seeing someone about it?”

“Like a shrink? Steve…I live in a trailer park. Something like that isn’t exactly in the budget. Besides, I’m not sure I’d be comfortable sharing all my secrets with a stranger like that.”

“I get that. Sometimes I think everyone in the party could use a little bit of therapy but it’s not like we can talk about the upside-down or demo-monsters without bringing the government down on our asses. So, it seems a little pointless.”

Eddie nods in agreement before carrying on. “I’m not always like that, though. I enjoy my life a lot of the time. I love my friends and Hellfire and my band. I’ll go weeks without so much as a negative thought but then – boom - I’ll just get hit with these awful feelings. Sometimes there’s a reason, right? Something shitty happens and I sulk about it for a while. But other times it just comes out of nowhere.”

“What usually helps when you get like that?”

“I don’t know. Nothing, I guess. Usually, I just hide myself away for a while until I can at least pretend to be normal.”

It hurts Steve’s heart to hear that. Eddie’s been dealing with this all on his own, his whole life. “You don’t think it would help you to talk to someone? Not a doctor, I mean, but like Wayne?”

“I can’t dump that stuff on him, he does enough for me already. I never wanted to worry him.”

“Okay well, what about me? I know we don’t know each other all that well yet but I already know about the weird shit so no problem talking about that stuff. I don’t know what kind of secrets you have but I gotta say, with everything we’ve both done and seen, I don’t think there’s anything you could tell me that would bother me or freak me out.”

Eddie considers him for a long moment and Steve desperately wishes he knew what the other boy was thinking.

“So, if I were to tell you I was gay, you’d say…?”

Steve should be surprised, and maybe he is, a little, but it’s vastly overshadowed by something that feels a little like relief or maybe hope? Now isn’t the time to worry about that though. This is about Eddie and making sure he feels safe, comfortable, and accepted.  

He turns, making sure to look Eddie firmly in the eye as he answers. “I would say - thank you for telling me and I’m honored you would trust me with such an important piece of yourself.”

Eddie eyes widen and he lets out a little surprised gasp. “You really are something else, Stevie.”

Part 5

#steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie fanfic #ao3 #steve x eddie #steve harrington/eddie munson #ao3 link #fanfic #alternating pov #CITU

[lutawolf]

hey hi hello ma’am Luta

so i really like this one quote Vegas said in ep13. during his talk with Porsche about parents after saying he doesn’t know anything about them, and also doesn’t think Kinn knows anything more about them he says ‘I was blinded by the adults not different from you, Porsche.’ and it’s one of my fav thing Vegas ever said.

to me it shows just how much he’s changed during the whole series but especially since he had Pete with him. he is now aware that the adults in his life majorly fucked him up and made bigger misnames than he did. and he can fix things, he has a choice in his life. and he’s realized it, maybe for the first time.

he now has to fix his relationship with Pete. and he has to be the one to take the steps as he is the one who fucked up, but also to show Pete he cares about him not his persona or him being a mirror. that he cares about Pete as a human being and is ready to treat his as such. that he’s ready to put Pete first.

but this one sentence shows me that he’s on a path to make thing right. because now he is aware that he was blinded by adults in his life, be it his father, with his abuse and continues pushing him into more violence or his uncle korn doing essentially the same thing but in a different way. he now has taken the blind fold off, he’s ready to face the reality of his world and the consequences of his actions (at least towards Pete).

and he stars doing it right away. i’m guessing Porsche turned to Vegas, as he said he’s the only one to not be bought by the major fam. and when Vegas asked for Pete to be there for the meeting (i’m guessing thats what his request was - to take Pete with him) Porsche rightfully guessed taht whatever happened to Pete at the minor fam house was Vegas’ fault. but he decides to give them a chance to kinda talk it out. he makes Vegas make the first move. he just brought Pete there but he’s not gonna force him to interact with Vegas.

just wondered if you felt similar

hope you have a wonderful day 🥰

Hey Hey Minnie!

I do believe similar to you. I think that he probably started to realize that his dad was full of shit when Pete told him he was. Because remember it's Pete that starts the whole truth. When he talks about Vegas' dad being hard on him because he never won himself. Then he slowly starts to be less bothered by what his father says until his father brought up Vegas mom. It was not only a below the belt hit but as far as Vegas is concerned, a lie. Then Vegas stands up to him and he got knocked down but, he at this point he can see and comprehend that his dad is full of shit. That he had been blinded by the adults.

Pete saying that he has nothing left "Not even my humanity" that's when it clicks for Vegas, that he has become his father. That the words he has said, calling him pet and saying it was just sex are equal to his father's comment. His mouth parts on an I'm sorry because he knows he is in the wrong. Pete interrupts him before he can talk though. Pete says "Right now, I feel useless, no, I've always been useless. I never exist." He is saying that he saw Vegas, but he never existed to him and now he knows it. He is saying that he thought he was someone, but Vegas has proven that was a lie. "I don't have anything left within me" I loved you, but it's gone. Vegas whispers' Pete's name in devastation now.

So, in one huge swoop he realized he has become someone he doesn't want to be, because Pete helped him see who his father really is. Plus, he lost the love of the only person he has ever loved. Someone who has always been there, even if just in the back ground.

I'm sure when he came to from that knock on the head and then got the news that Pete was truly gone. It was an epiphany moment. Then Porsche calls and Vegas grabs that chance quickly. He asks Porsche to bring Pete. Because he has to try and fix this.

So yes, I do believe similar to you. Hope you have a great day too 💜

#vegaspete #kinnporsche vegaspete #streaming kinnporsche #kinnporsche luta question and answer #kinnporsche luta #luta question and answer #coconuts mafia

[wonderswritings]

When Worlds Collide: Broken Universes

Summary: Five years ago, the world changed. Eight months ago, the world changed again; all with a snap of fingers. Now we’re dealing with the aftermath of those actions, and it’s hard for everyone. Especially for those they left behind. 

Warnings: No Way Home Spoilers, Angst, Mentions of Blood/Injuries, Character Death, PTSD, Possibly More to Come

Pairings: TASM!Peter Parker x Fem!Stark!Reader- nicknamed Mel

In this fic, Pepper is not your mother, and Morgan is only your half sister. You are Tony’s daughter, but your mother is never mentioned.

!!!Important!!! This is a rewrite of book 1 of WWC. Titles and some plot points will carry over.

Tags ~please please read the rules before filling out the form!

AO3

When Worlds Collide Masterlist

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You were back in the tower, sitting in the bay window, you back against the bookcase, texting Pepper.

Queen: YN, what were you thinking? Admitting to murder? What would possess you to do such a thing?

Witch: I was helping my friends

Queen: You’re friends who YOU grew up without. You’re an adult now YN. You can’t just do whatever you want.

You scoffed, shaking your head, grumbling.

“Pretty sure that’s exactly what it means.”

Witch: I think that means I can

Queen: Not without consequences you can’t.

Witch: And it’s because I’m an adult that I did what I did. They’re just kids

Queen: What would your father say?

You clenched your jaw, your grip on your phone tightening as you typed out a response.

Witch: He’d give me a high five and say good job

Queen: YN

Witch: He’d also be proud. Why can’t you?

You huffed, cutting your phone off, throwing it towards your bed as Matt walked into your room.

“They’re not pressing charges. And the previous charges have been dropped.”

You sighed, nodding as you turned to look out the window, looking out at the city.

“That’s good.”

Matt sighed, sitting down on the edge of your bed, facing you.

“YN-”

You shook your head, turning towards Matt.

“Thank you, for doing this. It- someone could say it’s a conflict of interest since you represented Peter and-”

Matt shook his head, sighing softly.

“Peter’s no longer my client since his charges have been cleared. There’s no conflict here.”

You nodded, turning to look back out the window, muttering.

“Right.”

“YN, you know I can sense that something’s wrong. What is it?”

You grinned slightly as you shook your head, sighing softly.

“Nothing. I’m fine.”

“YN.”

“It’s not even my problem. I’m fine.”

“Mel-”

You jumped when your phone started to ring, lifting your hand and using your powers to float your phone back to you, answering the phone when you saw who was calling.

“Peter?”

Peter was talking way too fast, his words jumbling together as you made a face, Matt tensing.

“Peter, stop, wait okay? Slow down. What’s wrong?”

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“You did what?!”

Peter started to twiddle with his fingers, kicking his foot against the floor, glancing at where Matt was sitting, Matt shrugging at him, causing Peter to look down at the floor.

“I sorta kinda, maybe, went to Doctor Strange for help.”

You tilted your head to the side, making a face.

“Doctor Strange?”

Peter nodded, glancing up at you.

“Yes.”

You shook your head, taking a step forward.

“Stephen Strange?”

Matt shook his head, grinning slightly.

“You should run.”

Peter shot Matt a glare, taking a deep breath before he looked back at you.

“Yes.”

Peter nodded, taking a step back when your hands lit up with your powers.

“For help.”

“Yes.”

You took another step forward, tilting your head to the side.

“Time altering help.”

Peter slowly nodded, backing up. He jumped when he hit the wall, taking a harsh deep breath when he saw your eyes glowing.

“Yes.” 

You nodded, balling your hands into fists.

“You have five seconds to tell me everything. And I mean everything.”

“I’d make it quick too, kid.”

Peter looked over at Matt, nodding.

“Right.”

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“So Peter, to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Right um, I’m really sorry to bother you sir, but-”

Stephen shook his head as he walked towards the fire pit, Peter following behind him.

“Please. We saved half the universe together.”

Stephen flicked his hand, creating a fire as he turned towards Peter, placing his hand on his hip.

“I think we’re beyond calling me sir.”

Peter nodded slightly, taking a deep breath.

“Okay, uh, Stephen.”

Stephen slightly made a face, tilting his head to the side.

“That feels weird, but I’ll allow it.”

“When um, when Mysterio revealed my identity, my entire life got screwed up and I was wondering, I mean, I don’t even know if this would actually work, but I was wondering if maybe you could go back in time and make it so he never did?”

Stephen watched Peter for a few minutes, nodding slightly as he stepped forward.

“Peter, we tampered with the stability of space and time to resurrect countless lives. You wanna do it again now, just because yours got messy?”

Peter shook his head, slightly making a face.

“This isn’t, it’s not just about me. I mean, this is really hurting a lot of people. My- my Aunt May, Happy, my best friend, my girlfriend, their futures are ruined just because they know me and they’ve done nothing wrong. And YN-”

Peter shook his head, scoffing.

“She just confessed to the world to a crime she didn’t commit. She’s putting everything she has on the line, for me.”

Stephen tilted his head to the side, slightly making a face.

“Stark’s kid?”

Peter nodded, sighing softly.

“Yeah.”

“I am so sorry, but even if I wanted to, I don’t have the time stone anymore.”

Peter sighed, nodding.

“That’s right. I’m really sorry if I wasted your time.”

“No, you didn’t-”

Peter shook his head, turning.

“Just forget about it.”

“He will.”

Peter jumped slightly, turning as Wong grabbed his suitcases, Stephen pointing a finger at him.

“He’s really good at forgetting things.”

“Wong.”

Stephen grinned, nodding.

“You’ve actually generated a good idea.”

“What?”

“The runes of Kofkol.”

Peter turned, looking back over at Stephen.

“The runes of Kofkol?”

Stephen looked over at Peter, nodding.

“Oh, it’s just a standard spell of forgetting. Won’t turn back time, but at least people will forget that you were ever Spiderman.”

“Seriously? That would be-”

Wong scoffed, shaking his head.

“No. Not seriously. That spell travels the dark borders between known and unknown reality. It’s too dangerous.”

Stephen rolled his eyes, scoffing.

“God, we’ve used it for a lot less. Do you remember the full moon party in Karma-Taj?”

Wong made a face, thinking back as Peter looked between them both. 

“No.”

“Exactly. Come on Wong. Hasn’t he been through enough?” Wong scoffed, shaking his head.

“Just leave me out of this.”

“Fine.”

A portal opened behind Wong, Wong stepping back through it, glaring at Strange.

“Fine.”

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You scoffed, shaking your head. There was no way. Absolutely no way. ‘Mr asshole’ willingly agreed to help mess with his precious reality? Hell no.

“I’m sorry, but you expect me to believe that Dr. Strange, a guy with a stick up his ass he can see it himself, agreed to help you change people’s memories?”

Peter huffed slightly, nodding.

“Yes.”

Peter tilted his head to the side, slightly making a face.

“Technically, it was his idea.”

You scoffed, shaking your head.

“I’m sorry, did being gone for five years make his brain short circuit?”

Matt laughed as Peter rubbed the back of his neck, shrugging slightly.

“Ah, no? I don’t think so. I don’t know.”

He shook his head, huffing slightly.

“But long story short, it didn’t work and that’s not why I’m here.”

You slightly scoffed as you shook your head, rubbing at your temples.

“It’s not.”

“No. I- Mr. Strange said that I should call MIT and plead my case with them.”

You dropped your hands, shooting Peter a slight glare.

“Isn’t that what I told you to do earlier?”

“Yes. But you were gonna do it for me. I just- I think this is something I need to do, myself.”

He looked over at you, his eyes wide as he shook his head.

“Not to say I’m not appreciative of everything you’ve done and all, but-”

You sighed, shaking your head.

“Peter, take a breath. It’s fine.”

He tilted his head to the side, shooting his puppy dog eyes at you.

“Really?”

You laughed, nodding.

“Yes Pete, really.”

You turned, grabbing a piece of paper and writing the information down. You turned, handing it to Peter.

“Here.”

He made a face, taking the paper from you.

“It’s the assistant vice chancellor of MIT. She’ll be able to help you.”

Peter looked up at you, his eyes wide.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

Peter surged forward, wrapping his arms around you.

“Thank you.”

You smiled, nodding as you returned the hug.

“Anytime Pete, you know that.”

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Happy’s arraignment was today, and you’d spent the night with him after Peter and Matt left, trying to calm him down. Matt had decided to be Happy’s lawyer, declining your request that someone else do it, no matter how many times you pleaded. Happy’s case was the third on the docket, so you’d been in court all morning, your phone shut off. Matt walked towards where you and Happy were sitting, stopping in front of you both.

“We should be up in twenty minutes.”

Happy nodded, taking deep breaths.

“Okay, okay, that’s fine.”

You shook your head, turning in your seat towards Happy.

“Happy, calm down, okay? Everything is going to be fine.”

“I know that. Don’t you think I know that? I’m cool.”

Happy glanced at you, nodding.

“You’re cool. We’re all cool. Everybody’s cool.”

Matt smirked slightly as you huffed, rolling your eyes.

“Happy, if you're so cool, then why are your legs vibrating?”

He huffed, placing his hands on his legs, stopping them from moving as he muttered.

“Shut up.”

You grinned, reaching out and placing your hand on top of Happy’s.

“Everything is going to be okay. Clearly Matt is one of the best lawyers there is considering he got my charges dropped and I confessed to murder.”

Happy shot you a look, shaking his head.

“That is not funny. You could’ve gone to jail.”

You shrugged, laughing.

“I’ve already been to jail! It’s a Stark right of passage. So, even if you do get charged and have to go to jail, no worries! We’ll get you out and get you a certificate that says ‘Hey, you survived jail, welcome to the family!”

Matt laughed, shaking his head as Happy shot you another look, stuttering.

“Th- that is not funny! Besides, I’ve already been to jail, with Tony, in fact.”

You nodded, humming.

“Oh I know that. But the certificates came later.”

Matt chuckled as you grinned, Happy shaking his head.

“I can actively feel my blood pressure rising. You are causing my blood pressure to rise and you’re going to give me a heart attack.”

You laughed, shaking your head as you placed your hand on Happy’s arm.

“Hap, you spent how many years by my dad’s side? If he didn’t give you a heart attack, I highly doubt I will.”

He shrugged, glancing at you with a small grin.

“There’s still time.”

You scoffed a laugh, shaking your head as you turned back towards Matt, leaning your head on Happy’s shoulder.

“Then it’s a good thing I know a really, really good lawyer.”

Matt grinned as he shook his head, turning when someone walked up behind him, the two speaking for a few seconds before he turned back towards you and Happy.

“We’re up.”

Meanwhile, Peter was with Strange in the Sanctum, Dr. Octavius watching as he and Strange went back and forth. One minute, Peter was standing in front of the glass, the next he was in one of the other cells.

“How’d you do that?”

Strange rolled his eyes, huffing as he glanced at Dr. Octavius.

“Lots of birthday parties.”

Peter gasped as the glass disappeared, falling through. 

“Hey.”

Stephen threw his arm out, Peter gasping at the golden brace that was on his arm, looking it over.

“Whoa.”

“One shot, send them here, move on.”

Strange turned, huffing.

“You’re welcome.” 

“Sir?”

Strange scoffed, turning back towards Peter, slightly tilting his head to the side.

“Now what?”

Peter slightly clenched his jaw as he took a deep breath, nodding.

“I know this is my mess, and I swear to you that I’ll fix it, but I’m gonna need some help.”

Strange scoffed, waving his hand around.

“Go.”

Peter nodded, moving towards the door when Strange yelled out.

“No Stark!”

Peter stopped, his eyes wide as he turned back towards Strange, throwing his hands up.

“What? Why not? YN can help! She will help!”

“She’s dangerous.”

Peter nodded, a look of understanding crossing his face.

“And she doesn’t like you.”

Strange pointed at Peter, shaking his head.

“No Stark.”

Peter nodded, turning as he called over his shoulder.

“Sure!”

Walking out of the room Peter shook his head, huffing.

“Now I see why Mel doesn’t like him.”

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“As of now, you have detected zero multiversal trespassers, so get on your phone, scour the internet, and scooby-doo this shit.”

MJ chuckled as she looked up at Strange, slightly grinning.

“You’re telling us what to do, even though it was your spell that got screwed up. Meaning that all of this is kind of your mess. You know, I know a couple of magic words myself, starting with the word ‘please.”

Strange turned slightly, glaring down at Peter.

“I thought I said no Starks.”

Peter glanced at MJ, shaking his head as he looked back at Strange.

“She’s not a Stark.”

Strange scoffed, muttering.

“Could’ve fooled me.”

MJ crossed her arms over her chest, tapping her foot as she looked up at Strange, causing him to roll his eyes.

“Please, scooby-doo this shit. You can work in the undercroft.”

“The undercroft?”

Peter led the way, and once they were at the bottom of the steps, MJ cut the light on, Ned gasping as he looked around, nodding.

“Badass.”

“Guys, listen. Bout this whole spell thing-”

“It’s totally okay.”

Peter made a face, tilting his head to the side.

“Wait, really?”

MJ nodded, offering Peter a small smile.

“Yeah. I mean, I get it. You were just trying to fix things. And so, maybe just run it by us next time, you know? That way when you’re thinking, ‘Hey, I’m about to do something that could break the universe’, we could like, help you. Workshop something, or brainstorm ideas.”

Peter smiled, nodding.

“Deal.”

He turned, looking over at Ned.

“Ned?”

Ned turned, holding a crossbow.

“Oh, dude. I don’t care and seriously, not a big deal.”

Ned grinned, walking towards a machine, his eyes widening as he flicked one of the strings.

“Ooh, a torture rack.”

MJ shook her head, pointing at the machine.

“That is a pilates machine.”

Ned nodded, turning.

“That is-”

“The crypt.”

Ned nodded, walking further into the room.

“Cool, cool, cool.”

“Okay, so we get the rest of the guys. You zap them, Doctor Magic will send them back. And when we get into MIT, round of stale donuts, my treat.”

“Let’s catch some multiverse men.”

MJ made a face, tilting her head to the side.

“Wait, where’s Mel?”

Ned nodded, turning back towards Peter and MJ.

“Yeah. I figured she would’ve been one of the ones to stop you and Strange from doing the spell.”

Peter winced, nodding as he rubbed at the back of his neck.

“Yeah, well, Mr. Strange said she couldn’t come here.”

“Why?”

“He said she’s dangerous.”

MJ grinned, nodding as she tilted her head to the side.

“She doesn’t like him.”

Peter nodded, sighing as he looked over at MJ.

“And she doesn’t like him.”

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You sighed as you rubbed your temple, leaning back in your chair.

“Karen, do not tell me you can’t comply with my wishes. Just tell me what I want to know.”

“I’m sorry, Miss. But Peter has given me specific instructions.”

“My dad created you! He put me in charge of all the A.I’s! That includes you! All you have to do is tell me where Peter is.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Come on Karen. I saw the fight on the bridge. Peter’s in trouble.”

“He’s a smart kid.”

You huffed a growl, shaking your head. 

“I never said he wasn’t. Friday, did you hear me say that?”

“No, Miss.”

“No one asked you, Friday.”

“I believe Miss Stark asked me a question. Unlike you, I know how to follow commands.”

“I am following commands.”

You scoffed, slamming your hands down on the table as you stood.

“Enough!”

Both A.I’s grew silent, causing you to shake your head.

“Honestly, I miss Jarvis.”

You huffed as you sat back down in your chair, resting your head on you hand.

“Karen, this is getting old and I’m tired. So we can either do this the easy way, or the hard way.”

“I’m afraid I can’t help you Miss.”

You nodded, clapping your hands together.

“Hard way it is then.”

“Miss, what are you doing?”

Friday had already pulled up Karen’s program for you, and you read through it, looking for the codes that were changed.

“Changing your program. If Pete can change your code, then so can I.”

“Miss, I don’t really think-”

You shook your head, typing out the new codes.

“Nope. You lost that right when you decided not to tell me where Peter is.”

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Your jaw was hurting from how hard you were clenching it. Your blood practically boiling as you made your way through the city, your fingers tapping against the steering wheel. Pulling onto the street, your anger grew, wisps of your powers swirling around your fingers as you parked. Walking up to the doors of the Sanctum you stopped, glaring at the doors.

“I hate this place.”

You walked up the steps, using your powers to open the doors, not bothering to shut them as you walked further into the Sanctum, looking around. 

“Alright, now where are you?”

“You shouldn’t be here.”

You turned, your powers growing brighter as you lifted your hand.

“You can put that away.”

You scoffed as Strange appeared at the stop of the staircase, glaring down at you as you lowered your hand.

“Where is he?”

Strange shook his head as you walked up the stairs, huffing as he glared at you.

“I specifically said you weren’t to be here.”

“Good thing he didn’t ask me to be here then.”

Strange made a face, tilting his head to the side.

“He didn’t?”

You shook your head, glaring at him.

“No, he didn’t. Which will be one of the many things I rage about once I see him. For now, you’ll just have to do.”

You stopped in front of him, glaring up at him.

“What the hell made you think it was a good idea to change people’s memories?!”

Strange looked down at you, slightly glaring at you.

“The kid asked for help.”

“He didn’t know any better!”

You lifted your hand, poking his chest, the tip of your finger glowing.

“You did!”

Strange slowly looked down at your hand, raising a brow.

“Put the powers away Stark.”

You poked his chest harder, your powers zapping Strange.

“Where. Is. Peter.”

Strange smirked as he moved his hands, a portal opening underneath you, causing you to fall. You huffed when you landed, glaring up at him.

“Fuck you Strange!”

He grinned as you flipped him off, waving down at you as he closed the portal.

“Asshole.”

You looked around, your eyes widening when you saw MJ and Ned sitting at a table. They jumped when they saw you, slamming something down as you stood.

“Where’s Peter?” 

Ned and MJ shared a look before they looked back at you, speaking at the same time as you walked towards them.

“He’s in the bathroom.”

“He’s at the store.”

You nodded, crossing your arms over your chest as you stopped in front of them, chuckling dryly.

“He’s in the bathroom and the store?”

MJ slightly glared at Ned before she turned back towards you, nodding.

“Yep. He had to go to the bathroom and then he was gonna go to the store.”

“Right”

You nodded towards the guy with the tentacle arms, pointing a lazy finger at him.

“Who’s that guy then?”

Ned made a face, shaking his head he laughed.

“Who’s what guy? There’s no guy.”

“Really?”

You turned, looking over at the guy, tilting your head to the side.

“Hey tentacle guy-”

He lifted his head, slightly glancing at you.

“Who are you?”

He stopped pacing as he turned, tilting his head to the side as he looked you over.

“Dr. Otto Octavius.”

You nodded, looking back down at Ned.

“You were saying?”

“Peter’s still not here.”

“Where is he?”

Ned shrugged, shaking his head.

“Don’t know.”

MJ sighed, looking over at you.

“He’s trying to find the other multiverse men.”

You tilted your head to the side, slightly making a face.

“Multiverse?”

“Peter came to Dr. Strange for a spell-”

You nodded, cutting MJ off. “Yeah, I know all of that. He told me after it happened.”

She took a deep breath, looking down at the floor before she glanced back at you.

“It backfired.”

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[timedoesntexistclocksdo]

Yello my names Barron, but Bear is snazzier call me Bear :3

Just a guy being a dude on tumblr and hanging out, I make posts sometimes??? Idk I’ve only just started interacting with people here.

I’m multi fandom and interact with posts including but not limited to Rtgame/Rtumblr, Ninjago, the Stanley parable, Undertale/Deltarune and others I can’t think of right now.

Apparently also a part of the Rtumblr Rp scene now?? Don’t know how that happened, but I’m along for the ride now! /Pos I’ll find a tag for those soon lol

I make art sometimes, I barely post it here but I think I made an art blog a while back? It’s uh @self-indulgent-art-blog not a lot there at the moment but I’ll probably put it to use soon. Otherwise on this blog my art is under #bearable art or #bearable sketches

Some boundaries:

I’m over 18 so suggestive jokes are allowed but only to an extent.

Asks and interacting in the tags are always appreciated! I really won’t mind, and I don’t bite! Unless you ask /j

Spamming likes is fine but rebloging is preferred, I don’t mind the notifs but just liking things is a little iffy to me (I’ll get to it below)

I’m not gonna make a DNI but I will block people if I feel like it or if you have bad takes. Empty blogs on thin ice, for the love of god just reblog stuff with no tags it’s not hard I’ve been doing it for years. /lh

But seriously for any blank blogs following me here are some easy steps so you can have a better experience on tumblr. Under the cut for your convenience. <3

1. Give yourself a basic profile picture, any public domain image will work. If you want to use fan art credit the artist please (headers are optional)

2. Reblogging is *necessary* on tumblr your likes mean nothing. Tags are not necessary, but are appreciated. Reblogging makes the post reach more people especially with art.

3. Take some time to process your emotions when you see something that upsets you, your feelings about something are valid but your actions are still your responsibility. Anonymity makes you think that you can do whatever you want and not face consequences, but there is still another person on the other side of the screen.

4. Put either “minor” or “adult” in your bio, this step is mostly optional but it helps NSFT (not safe for tumblr) blogs or just adults in general know if they should block you or not. NSFT blogs don’t want minors following them (obviously) and some people just aren’t comfortable with that either. It’s none of your business either way and you should respect peoples boundaries.

4b. Speaking of boundaries (and this is specifically aimed at minors) please respect if someone doesn’t want you interacting. I know you feel like you’re very mature for your age but especially with NSFT blogs it can make people very uncomfortable. Please wait until you’re over 18.

5. People have the right to block you. Wether it’s because your vibes are off or you’re on their DNI list, it’s not personal. Also don’t block evade that’s a dick move bro.

6. Have fun, and take some breaks! You control your internet experience and you don’t have to post anything! Ultimately it’s up to you to check in and take care of yourself!

Have fun and stay safe Bear cubs!

#bearable posts #bear speaks #got a pinned post now pog #becoming a real tumblrina /j

[sarahwrites37]

Lines from "Maybe In Another Life" by Taylor Jenkins Reid that altered my brain chemistry 🫀

My life may be a little bit of a disaster. But I am not going to lie here and stare at the ceiling, worrying the night away. Instead, I go to sleep soundly, believing I will do better tomorrow. Things will be better tomorrow. I’ll figure this all out tomorrow. Tomorrow is, for me, a brand-new day.

Even after I got over him, I was never able to extinguish the fire completely. He still, all these years later, shines brighter to me than other people.

I may be broken and scared. But I am alive.

I want to try order instead of chaos.

I’m going to make a plan. I’m going to be proactive.

And then I realize that simple and easy aren’t the same thing.

I have a life to create here. Romance is great. But it’s only one part of a well-rounded life.

Things will always work out for Hannah. You know? She was born under a lucky star or something.

I am here today, alive today, because I made the right choices, however brief and insignificant they felt at the time.

I find that when you are doing something you are not supposed to be doing, the best course of action is to act as if you are absolutely supposed to be doing it.

“We don’t know what would have happened. But whatever would have happened wasn’t supposed to happen.”

“Say it with me. Everything is going to be great.”

We can’t say what we would do in other circumstances. We can only know what we will do with the ones we face.

“I can’t love a different movie just because everyone loves the movie I love.”

I want to try to do something myself, knowing that when I have nothing left, someone will take me the rest of the way.

Her voice is strong and stoic. She is a force to be reckoned with.

I have to admit things in order to move forward.

"You are unstoppable. You are the strongest woman I’ve ever known.” "Strongest person. She is the strongest person I know. Her gender is irrelevant."

And part of loving someone, part of being the recipient of trust, is telling the truth even when it’s awful.

And I think to myself that if, by being here, I have taken away one one-hundredth of the pain that Gabby feels, then maybe I have more of a life’s purpose than I ever thought.

“Like you meet them and you think, this one isn’t like the rest of them, this one is something?”

I thought it the first time I met Ethan. I thought there was something different about him, something special. And I was right. Look at what we had. It turned out not to be for a lifetime, but that’s OK. It was real when it happened.

I truly believe we could mean something to each other, and we owe it to ourselves to see.

If I’m meant to find him, I’ll find him. But sometimes I wish I got to decide what I was meant to do.

“You know, when you meet the love of your life, it makes you do crazy things"

I’d go so far as to say your actions in love are not an exception to who you are. They are, in fact, the very definition of who you are.

"I don’t think meeting the love of your life gives you carte blanche to ruin everything in your path. There are a lot of people out there who find the person they believe they are supposed to be with, and it doesn’t work out because they have other things they have to do, they act like adults and do the right thing.”

We make choices, big and small, every day of our lives, and those choices have consequences. We don’t get to erase them just by saying we didn’t mean to. Fate or not, our lives are still the results of our choices.

I’m no longer a person willing to pretend the things I’ve done wrong are justifiable because of how they make me feel.

I’ve been thinking about breaking the rules. I’ve been thinking about giving you my number. Or asking for yours. But I care too much about my work to compromise it by doing something I’ve sworn not to do. All of this is to say that I wish we had met under different circumstances. Maybe one day we will end up at the same place at the same time. When we are just two people.

If there are people in this world we are supposed to love, we’ll find them in time.

The future is so incredibly unpredictable that trying to plan for it is like studying for a test you’ll never take.

That’s what you do when you want something. You don’t look for reasons why it won’t work. You look for reasons why it will.

If you love someone, if you think you could make them happy for the rest of your life together, then nothing should stop you. You should be prepared to take them as they are and deal with the consequences.

Relationships aren’t neat and clean. They’re ugly and messy, and they make almost no sense except to the two people in them.

“I mean I love you, and I want to be with you, and if you want to be with me, then nothing is going to stop me."

The world is splitting further and further into an infinite number of parallel universes where everything that could happen is happening. It’s a legitimate interpretation of quantum mechanics.

It’s entirely possible that every time we make a decision, there is a version of us out there somewhere who made a different choice.

I have to think that while I may exist in other universes, none is as good as this.

So I have to think that while I may exist in other universes, none of them are as sweet as this.

#maybe in another life #taylor jenkins reid #book quotes

[northwest-cryptid]

To all my fellow Americans who live in a dystopian hellscape. I urge you genuinely to understand that we live in the “cyberpunk future” already but we’re either too unaware of how, or too scared to go out there and actually be punks. 

When I say “genuinely understand” I literally mean you should look into your rights, understand what power you hold and where your legal limits are, understand what legal limits you can push without serious consequence, and which you can do without hurting others.

For example: Shoplifting is something I see a lot of tumblr blogs preach as being good and moral and harmless uwu but in reality, if you shoplift from small businesses, even chains; it hurts their lowest ladder employees. I watched as our upper management cut hours for our associates thanks to theft, at one point one of my employees was working literally 4 hours a week trying to support his family. We were a novelty store, there was nothing we sold that someone needed in order to survive. Our CEO never felt the impact of that theft, I as a manager; never felt the impact of that theft. When I made a fuss over it and actively stepped up to stop theft I was asked by a fellow manager why I cared so much since it ultimately doesn’t hurt me. I really had to sit a grown ass adult down and explain that I watched the company cut employee pay from 10 an hour (which is bullshit as it is) down to barely above 7 an hour, and then cut hours from 12 a week (which again isn’t even part time) down to 4, and how that negatively effects our employees abilities to live a basic comfortable life. 

You want to know how I prevented shoplifters? I caught them, and proceeded to educate them. I explained to them who they were hurting, and even offered to buy whatever it was they were trying to steal for them. I would then explain that if you’re going to shoplift you need to educate yourself on where you can safely shoplift without hurting the employees. I got to know several shoplifters who would regularly stop in and ensure me “don’t worry I’m not here to steal, I don’t steal from you guys anymore but I am fine if you still wanna keep an eye on me.” 

I don’t wanna take up all the space on your dash because I understand many of us come to social media like this to escape stress and go laugh at silly memes and the like, so if you’re at all interested in this topic and understanding the rights you have as an employee the button is right there.

As far as employees go, when it comes to just about 90% of retail staff, your employer needs you more than you need them but they really push for you to forget that. I wasn’t previously aware of this, but as little as 2 employees qualify as a legal walkout. That means if you and one other associate decide you’re not being treated fairly, paid properly, or are just being taken advantage of, you can participate in a legal walkout which is protected under law and counts as protest. However understanding your legal working rights is super important because if you don’t your employer can hold that lack of knowledge over you and use it against you. I once had a manager get furious with me because I pulled up the actual legal law for my state to explain “actually according to this government website of laws I am legally allowed a break given my working hours, so yes I will be taking a lunch or you will be facing legal action.” 

Punks in media are so often displayed opposing the power with guns and violence, but in reality we live in a time of facial recognition we can fight with funny anti-computer makeup, and the authority isn’t necessarily a cop but rather an employer or landlord holding our right to a comfortable life over us and assuming we will be a slave, I don’t need a gun when I am armed with my knowledge of the law and the bravery to outright declare that I will take legal action against my employer if they you know, break the law. There is a genuine power to being able to say “actually I am not the one breaking the US legal law here, you are. Unless you want me to take action on that, I recommend you allow me my rights.” 

We so often talk about being punk and fighting against the oppressive power, but in reality every time I hear someone say that to me they really me “we” as in “someone else” and let me tell you right now, in a room of people who are all waiting for “someone else” to fight their battle for them, no one is going to get what they’re waiting for. I understand it feels tiresome and pointless, I understand it can be hard, those who stand against you have made it that way on purpose, because they’re relying on you being too tired and too worn down to ever properly arm yourself. Stop waiting for some punk knight in hot topic clothes to fight your battle for you, get out there and be punk, arm yourself with knowledge of the law, use their own power against them. I say this as a manager who has been empowering my employees for years now. I have genuinely fought for and achieved higher wages and better working conditions at places who have since banned me from working there because I was the one who martyred for the cause and they never thought someone would dare do such a thing or have the power and understanding to do it. 

I want to really quickly remind you, or inform you that simply put; someone who is calm and collected will not threaten you. People only make threats when they’re scared, when they’re upset that they’ve been backed into a corner where they can’t actually post an argument against you. This is why my managers attack me as a person rather than my arguments and claims, this is why my managers have threatened my job while knowing full well they can’t actually fire me legally. Because they never thought someone would come along who demanded to be treated like a human and was willing to back up those demands with actual solid understanding of their rights and laws. 

If you’re curious how you can go about learning this stuff, there’s a few ways. One of those ways is genuinely to talk to people like myself about it. I’m a manager, I’m privy to fun little training videos all about unions and how “scary” they are and as such I’m taught specifically what my employees are legally allowed to do. It’s funny because they tell me these things as if I should be scared and keep this information from my employees lest they try to use it. Meanwhile I go out on the floor and go “HEY GUYS DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST WALK OUT AND WE CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT IT?!”

Okay that’s great and all but I don’t live in your state, and I don’t work at your company so your laws might be very different from mine; right? Well yea that’s very true so then how would you learn about your specific rights and laws to empower yourself to protect yourself from corporate bullshit? Well honestly, I know it sucks to say this but; the internet is your greatest asset here. Whether that’s reaching out to unions for your line of work, looking up your state’s labor laws and reading through what applies to your situation (literally use the search function to go straight to the relevant information), or even finding forums and online communities for people in your job/field. There are people out there fighting the good fight and they are more than happy to help arm you properly. 

I can only help so much, if you actually want to be prepared you need to take those extra steps, you need to actually go out and learn for yourself and understand your rights.

When it doesn’t come to work laws, things like piracy and the lot work very similarly. Talk to experienced pirates (yar har my friends I can help) and learn how communities operate. Learn about how IFC chips function and how to protect yourself from them, or how to best use technology. Investigate how to actually take back your privacy and use technology to foil those who wish to monitor you. 

In the end, I need you to understand that you have power, you’re not some weak defenseless victim; you’re simply told that you are by the people who are scared that you might wake up and realize you’ve had a gun in your pocket this whole time.

#Personal rambling shit

[books-and-catears]

Welp, since I’m a regular now; I’mma just park my chair here and spin the idea wheel. And so the idea wheel has decided!

Let’s have the Brothers and Undatables react to MC just barging in unexpectedly while they’re busy doing whatever. Everyone’s just vibing together at Diavolo’s talking about things, playing games, and all dat jazz and suddenly MC comes in with a blank face before they get a sad expression (they’re this close 👌🏾 to having a breakdown, it’s so sad).

MC:....Can I have a hug? 🥺 *says weakly as they were seconds away from crying*

Bby needs comfort! (Let’s just say they recently lost a loved one and they want some affection)

My first ever regular. You have no idea how much I cherish you. Thank you for the funniest and angstiest asks ever. This hits too close to home. I've lost two very close people to disease and suicide in the last few years and the feeling is horrible. So this might end up being a bit self indulgent... apologies.

Please if any of your friends seem not okay, check up on them regularly. Even the adults in your life. And most importantly check up on yourself. Take care okay?

I will do my best to do this justice too. Sorry if it's a little late college and extra classes are a pain sometimes.

It was not news you were prepared to receive. Not that day. It was supposed to be a day of celebration.

Lord Diavolo had announced a small party just for Council and the exchange students. Asmo had taken hours to get you ready. Everyone was excited and in good spirits, clinking their glasses and cheering for a joyous reunion. There was music, dancing and laughter so loud, it felt like it was echoing all across Devildom.

And yet here you were in the bathroom, bent over a sink, staring at yourself in disbelief. You had received horrible news from the human world.

A last message an old friend had left for you.

"Hey MC, thanks for being kind to me. Although we have a long and sweet history, it felt good to reconnect and feel wanted in my last few days. Thanks for the last hug, MC. It was the best one I've ever had."

What kind of bittersweet message was this? What was the point of making them feel wanted if they still left anyway?

No you must keep your composure, you think. The laughter keeps echoing louder. While internal screams creep up your throat. You have to go back before they start worrying about you.

The doors to the ballroom feel heavy as you push through. "Hey look! MC's back! Now we-- MC...?"

You don't know what face you were making, but everyone went quiet. Some looked horrified, some worried and some panicked. You felt your head go dizzy with the pain, tears stinging the corners it your eyes.

Looking directly at one of them, you croaked out the first thing that came into mind.

"C-could I have a hug?"

Lucifer

This man isn't a hugger. But for you he'd make an exception every day.

Especially when you asked for it so desperately.

Walk up to you swiftly, holding the back of your head and pressing it to his chest, while his other arm wraps around you.

"Would you prefer to spend some time in private?" He whispers as you break into soft sobs in his arms and nod.

"Excuse us. We'll be back shortly. Anyone who follows us will face consequences. MC needs some time alone." He calls out to the rest and whisks you away to his room.

Makes you sit in his lap as he cradles you while you cry. Keeps telling you it's not your fault and you tried your best.

Mammon

Someone save this boy, he is a mess himself.

He feels guilty already. He can't stand to see you this way. What couldn't he protect you from??

Aren't you the one who rushes to give people hugs?

He returns the favour. Sprinting towards you and engulfing you instantly in his arms.

He feels your shaky breath as you cling on to him and goes bezerk.

"Oi. I'm taking MC home." It's the most serious he has ever been.

Doesn't hesitate to bring out his wings and fly you home as soon as possible. He cups your face as you cry, his fingers wiping down each tear. His eyes are pained looking at you like this, it wasn't even your fault. You tried till the end didn't you?

Leviathan

This man's protective trigger has been switched. Who dare be the cause of this?

You're his cheery best friend. He simply won't stand to see you like this.

Runs towards you and hugs you as tight as he can, like you've done for him so many times. Embarassment be damned.

You asked for a hug, he will definitely give you one. You grab onto his jacket with trembling fingers and lean into him.

"MC would you like to go home ?" He asks softly, patting your head. You nod softly.

Takes you home as fast as possible, and lays you down in his tub. When start crying violently he starts to tear up alongside you. Losing a friend isn't easy afterall.

Satan

His first instinct was violence. His fist tightening, about to murder whoever did this to you.

But the moment you raised your arms, asking for a hug in that small voice, it was like looking at a helpless kitten in pain.

Another one who sprints towards you to hold you close. His hug feels gentle yet urgent at the same time.

He cupped your cheek, and stared as your eyes grew misty. "Don't worry we're getting out this instant." Slammed the doors behind him as he left. A subtle message to leave them be.

He took you to common room, near the fireplace to warm you up, one of his arms always around you, as you wailed and choked on your tears. He presses kisses on your head too and tells you how kind you were. You did your part. You weren't responsible for someone else's actions.

Asmodeus

He is gasping and tearing up at the sight of you. Oh you poor thing who dare hurt you?!

How could he ever say no to your hugs? Especially now when you needed him most?

He comes at you with such speed that you both almost topple over. He rubs your back and arms trying to calm you down with his touch as he hugs you.

"Would you like to be alone with me MC?" The moment you nod, his wings are out and you're soaring through the air until you find yourself in his bath.

You lean against him and cry your heart out, he holds you from behind, pressing kisses on your head whispering it's okay.

Beelzebub

Baby boy is heartbroken. Why do you look like that? Where are you hurt?

He immediately hates that look on your face. He must do something to fix it immediately.

Runs and lifts you up in his arms and holds you so close to himself, his arms providing endless protection.

"MC will food make it better?" You shake your head so he takes off. He doesn't care about the feast he missed, he just wants you to be okay.

Flies you into his room and gives you plushies to hold onto while he gets you all your favourite food. Will hold you tight as you sob into his chest and will feed you later on cause he knows how exhausting crying can be.

Belphegor

He knows that face. And he knows the pain behind it. And now he's feeling it too.

Who did this? Who dared? Tell him their name and they're gone.

A hug, huh? He's ready to give you much more than that if you ask.

Walks towards you and wraps you up in his jacket and then his arms. His hug is so warm and soft you could fall asleep right there.

"Let's go lie down together." He will take you home and put you down in his bed, bundled up in his blanket, his soft pillow under your head. Pulls you flush against him as you sob and scream into his pillow.

Solomon

He is human. Of course he knows the face of ultimate pain. He's been through it so many times he's made himself immune.

But he wasn't immune to yours. Your ever smiling face - that was what he liked. This irked him, made him restless.

He's next to you in the blink of an eye, wrapping his arms around you, cloak and all, his mouth pressing down on your head.

"Let's take it to the sky shall we? Don't worry I've got you." He says softly. You nod, your fingers grasping at his shirt.

And in mere seconds you are soaring above the clouds, the gentle air cooling your burning heart as you cry into the wind. He holds you close and whispering to make you feel better.

Diavolo

He has seen this face only once before. When Lucifer came to him Lilith dying in his arms.

He saw the look on yours and he was determined to help you however he could. And if it started with a hug so be it.

Takes big strides and hoists you up in his arms, as you wrap your shaking arms around his neck and press your face into his jacket.

"The party is over. MC shall stay with me tonight I'll send them back when they feel better." Gone was his usual cheery tone. He seemed distraught, angry almost.

Took you to his bedroom and laid you down softly, still holding onto you tightly, keeping you from falling apart as you sob into his arms. Takes the next days off to be next to you.

Simeon

His emotions mirror your own. Seeing you in such pain, makes him feel the same.

His heart is breaking seeing you this way. He can't hold you fast enough.

He swiftly runs to hold your hands first. He feels them tremble in his own and he wraps himself around Immediately, cradling your head delicately.

"Let's get you away. You'd like that won't you?" He says running his fingers through your hair. You let you a breathy yes and he's off.

You land in Purgatory hall, curled up into him on the couch, freshly brewed flower tea on the table. He holds you close as you cry into his arms. Tells you that your friend is in a better place because you healed their soul before they left.

Barbatos

You made the usually composed demon crack. Even if for a moment, he felt the need to do something extreme.

What was causing you this much discomfort? He was ready to eliminate it.

A mere hug? Is that what would make you feel better? He is ready to deliver.

He's there before you know it, holding you like delicate royalty. You could crumble at how soft he was for you.

"Would you prefer somwhere more quiet?" He asks. You only need to nod once and he's already sweeping you off your feet and into his chambers. Picks the most calming teas for you as he sits by your side holding your hand.

Luke

He knew the demons were no good. Of course it was a matter of time before MC got hurt again.

He was about to cry looking at you, ready to throw hands at the whoever caused this.

A hug? A hug will help? YES OF COURSE.

He flies straight into, wrapping his little arms around your neck. Like a baby brother comforting a distraught older sibling.

"Come on MC! Let's get away from here!" He says and flies you off to purgatory hall. He brings you to the kitchen and starts whipping up your favourite desserts to cheer you up.

#obey me angst #obey me angst fic #obey me headcanon #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me beel #obey me fluff #obey me belphie #obey me levi #obey me mammon #obey me imagine #obey me solomon #obey me diavolo #obey me luke #obey me simeon #obey me game #obey me brothers #obey me headcanons #obey me sad mc

[thenovelartist]

Boys as Dads - Tears of Themis Headcanons

I've been sitting on this for days, writing it after @luke-appreciator mentioned the boys as dads and henceforth planting the idea in my mind.

Luke

LOOK! Luke is living past his three year “time limit” goshdarnit! He gets to see his kids grow up!

And he has several of them with his MC (I’m thinking four or five.)

They were all mostly planned. (They were just rolling with however many they were blessed with until they decided to stop.)

When his first child was born, he cried. He didn’t think he’d get this opportunity, but now he’s a dad and feels overwhelmed by the blessing.

He is as involved in his kids’ lives as he possibly can be.

He’s the dad that will teach his kids how to fix everything.

Totally the hands-on dad of wrestling and headlocks and ruffling their hair.

Yes, even his girls, but in a slightly different context. Uses those moments to teach them self-defense. (Yes, he’ll do that to his boys, but he’s more concerned about his girls.)

That said, he’s very protective of his kids and wants to give them all the knowledge he can to make sure they can keep themselves safe.

Will try to get his kids into Sherlock Holmes.

One of his kids is named John after John Watson. It was actually MC’s idea, much to Luke’s surprise and delight.

When he’s away on mission (which already makes him sad because he doesn’t like being away from his precious family), he hates it when he has to go full dark mode. Because he’d at least like to call them and tell them good night if he can’t be there.

The king of pictures.

There are cameras scattered throughout the house so he can easily steal a picture whenever he wants to.

Will put together scrapbooks upon scrapbooks of photographs for all kinds of events. The kids get in on these activities, and it has become a bit of a family event to arrange the pages together.

Not a day goes by he takes for granted. Does not matter if he’s cleaning up diapers or one of his kids is sick or he’s having to do damage control when something gets out of hand. He cherishes all of it.

Vyn

I see Vyn having one or two. Both were totally planned.

Mostly, he just sees children as patients, but now, he’s got two children he actually raises.

And the moment his first child is placed into his arms, he realizes with sickening clarity that his actions have a direct impact on their lives.

While he knew that beforehand, there was a moment it clicked, and Vyn felt himself change that day.

He strives to be the best father he can, minding everything he does to lead by example.

He didn’t have the greatest childhood, meaning he does everything he can to make sure his kids never have to experience the things he wished never happened to him.

He’s a bit of a helicopter parent despite knowing he needs to not be. All he wants to do is protect his kids, is that so wrong?

However, because of that, he happens to understand and sympathize with parents more now. His kids wrecked him in ways he didn’t think possible.

It’s a bit of a learning experience for him to allow his kids to learn on their own. He knows so much and wants to just tell them everything they need to know, but realizes that he can’t do that. He has to let them learn and grow in their own ways.

He wants to give his kids the best, from quality schooling to extracurricular activities. But he’s also is more than happy to teach them their way around the kitchen and garden as well as play games and do puzzles with them.

Also really enjoys reading them books at bedtime. A habit that will linger around for surprisingly long while.

He’s the dad that is glad to help with homework whenever they need it.

Always offers to listen to them and talk them through things. It would be pretty shameful if the psychiatrist couldn’t help guide his own kids through their own mental hurdles.

And he knows he did something right because his kids are comfortable talking with him about a lot of things, even in their teenage and young adult years.

Ends up the dad who has the best life advice that his kids eventually learn to always listen to even if they don’t appreciate it when they’re younger.

Artem

Ends up with a large family, both adopting and raising his own.

Probably two of their own, and two or three (or four… maybe five) adopted.

The kids they had were planned; the ones they adopted… not always. It tended to be a “this one grew on you unexpectedly” situation.

Loves all his kids equally, whether they’re his own or adopted.

Super supportive dad. Probably spoils his kids in praise and hugs.

That being said, he won’t coddle them. He’s all for supporting them, but knows when to allow his kids face the negative consequences of their actions. He’s an attorney, after all. This is his “justice” side showing.

But he’s fair. He will guide them the best he can but will let experience be the teacher if he needs to. And if experience is the cruel teacher of the day, he’ll be there, whether to pick them up, dust them off, and offer hugs or to talk them through how to best navigate the consequences and avoid the situation next time.

His schedule revolves around any and all events in his kids’ lives. Which, considering the size of his family, is a balancing act.

Days off are sacred. That is his time to spend with his family.

Nightly family dinners are a big thing in the Wing household. Game nights on weekends are even bigger. And louder.

He’s the dad that can go from tutus and tea parties to action figures and lego sets. Whatever his kids are up for, he’ll gladly participate.

Every year, for each kid’s birthday, will spend one-on-one time with them and do whatever they want to do for an entire day. With a big family, especially with the adopted ones, he knows it might be easy to feel lost in the crowd and doesn’t want any of his kids thinking that.

Once a year, they go on a week-long vacation somewhere in nature. No phones, no technology; this is family bonding time and time for kids to just run around and be kids.

All in all, grade A dad.

Marius

Ends up with two or three.

The first one was a surprise, and likely one more after that was not planned, either.

But the moment he holds his first child, a switch goes off in his mind and Marius matures, knowing he’s got not only his girl to protect and keep safe but now a helpless little one who’s wholly dependent upon him.

He’s probably the second most hover-y of the boys behind Vyn. And that’s less because he’s a helicopter parent and more because he knows he’s a target for people and is very concerned for his kids’ safety. So he’s hypervigilant of everything, including what school they go to, who they’re friends with, where they go, etc.

Their house… oh my…

He’s an artist, and he will inspire that in his kids. There’s paint, stickers, crayons, and markers freaking everywhere.

Oh, and art taped to practically every wall. And a few in his office.

Marks every major event down on a calendar. His assistant knows there will be hell to pay if there’s a scheduling mishap.

Never let him help with homework (unless it’s art). Because he’s the guy who will teach his kids the smartass answers to some questions, even if it gets his kids in trouble.

(Spoiler: his kids never mind and instead pick up his bad habits.)

(Much to MC’s chagrin. Will make Marius go sit in the corner, much to his children’s delight.)

Will put his kids into any extracurricular activities they want growing up.

Totally spoils them in that way.

But the minute they turn into little shits about their wealth? Say good bye to your technology for the next few days. Marius is all about spoiling his kids, but not rotten. Even he hates snotty rich people he has to deal with, and he’s not gonna let his kids be like that.

Loves spending time doing things with his kids. Up for anything from the midday ice creams when mom told them no to spontaneous adventures. Oh yeah, he’s that dad.

#tears of themis #tears of themis headcanons #luke pierce #vyn richter #artem wing #marius von hagen

[robininthelabyrinth]

Same universe as the one where LXC kills JGY on a boat to not-Japan. JRS-centric as he grows up in the Nie clan and deals with his reputation as an inbred son of a traitorous bastard.

so I don't think I've ever written a fic in which LXC kills JGY on a boat, and definitely not one where JRS is a character? I mean, I've written a lot of fics, so possibly I did and I forgot, but I'm pretty sure about this one.

That being said, I don't think I've gotten any Jin Rusong prompts before so I'm reinterpreting this to be a prompt for a fic about JRS growing up in the Nie clan. Fic below!

ao3

-

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, Nie Huaisang reminded himself. Risk is proportionate with reward. Your spine should be made of steel, just as your saber is.

He licked his lips, thought of his brother who had loved him, and threw himself forward with tears in his eyes.

“Oh, gongzi!” he blubbered. “Can you help me? I’ve gotten completelylost, I don’t even know where to begin –”

Xue Yang blinked at him, the lids of his eyes moving slowly like a reptile.

“Maybe you know where my san-ge is? Lianfeng-zun?”

The feeling of immediate threat lessened. It seemed he’d gambled right, and the rabid dog that was Xue Yang could still be controlled by reference to Jin Guangyao.

“I’d really appreciate it if you could just give me some guidance on where to find him,” Nie Huaisang said, lowering his voice confidentially. “I’d be sure to pay you back! If there’s anything you want –”

“Do you have any snacks?” Xue Yang asked.

Nie Huaisang, who had come prepared based on the rumors he’d painstakingly collected, produced some dragons’ beard candy.

“Not bad,” Xue Yang said. “Okay, sure.”

Nie Huaisang smiled, and even meant it.

-

“Hey, good-for-nothing,” Xue Yang said, and Nie Huaisang turned to look at his least favorite but nevertheless highly useful source of information in Lanling Jin. The fact that Xue Yang had no idea that he was functioning as such just made it more satisfactory. “You like kids, right?”

Nie Huaisang blinked. “Yes?” he hazarded, not so much because he actually did – he’d never had strong feelings about children one way or the other, though perhaps he was being presumptuous in thinking that the reference did not involve goats – but because that seemed to be the answer Xue Yang was looking for.

Xue Yang wrinkled his nose in distaste, though not, Nie Huaisang thought, at him.

“Theoretically,” he said, and he wouldn’t know ‘theoretical’ if it hit him in the face, “if there were, I don’t know, a whole bunch of them hanging around somewhere without parents, you’d be able to do something about that, right? Especially if they had a talent for cultivation?”

It took only a moment to piece together what must have happened to lead to such a question, given the ruthlessness of the cultivation world and of Jin Guangyao in particular, and Nie Huaisang marveled briefly at the idea that Xue Yang might draw a moral line in the sand over something. Presumably he felt some kinship to the children, being similarly utterly infantile, amoral, and fond of sweet things.

“Oh sure!” he said, playing up the brainless idiot who didn’t know to ask questions. “My sect is always recruiting, you know. We took some losses in the war and, well, I feel like adult cultivators aren’t really all that interestedin joining ever since I took over…”

“Because you’re a waste of space,” Xue Yang said, and Nie Huaisang pouted at him. “Whatever, the important thing is that you have space for kids. Orphans. Think, like, a whole orphanage getting shut down or whatever – anyway, not important. You’d take them back to Qinghe, right?”

“Oh, that would be so wonderful!” Nie Huaisang clapped. “That would suit everyone, wouldn’t it? They don’t have to worry about the children, and we get new disciples. I should tell san-ge – no, on second thought, he might be too busy –”

“Definitely too busy,” Xue Yang said quickly. “Wouldn’t it be nice to accomplish something yourself? You could casually show him that your numbers went up at the end of the month instead so he gives you the credit, without explaining that it’s kids making up the increase.”

“That’s a great idea! He’ll be much more impressed by that, I should definitely do that. Where is the orphanage?”

“…uh, in the forest. The back forest.”

You couldn’t come up with a better lie?

“You already brought them here?” Nie Huaisang asked, batting his eyelashes. “You’re so nice, Xue-xiong! I’ll go tell my second in command to go deal with it right away!”

-

It was in the fifth round of kids getting picked up – small cultivation clans being massacred and there was nothing Nie Huaisang could do about it, because there was either no evidence or else Jin Guangyao had come up with some motive to justify his actions and, inevitably, Lan Xichen would be there behind him, soothing over tempers and providing explanations because he believed him, every time – that something unusual happened.

“Sect Leader Nie,” one of his most trusted subordinates murmured into his ear. “There’s a problem.”

Nie Huaisang found a reason to leave the party early, a reason to go to the rendezvous point, and, once there, found the reason for the problem.

“Oh, hey there,” he said with a smile fixed onto his face by sheer force of willpower, crouching down to make himself seem less intimidating. Not that he was ever particularly intimidating, though given the rage coursing through his veins right now, he thought he might be able to pull it off if he tried. “What a lucky chance! It’s so funny, finding you here, Songsong. How are you?”

Jin Rusong wiped his eyes and looked tearily at him, recognized that the person asking was his Little Uncle Nie, and threw himself into Nie Huaisang’s arms with a howl.

This was pretty typical – Jin Rusong wasn’t much of a crier, but when he did he definitely took Nie Huaisang as his model, something all the other adults in the cultivation world had a tendency to give Nie Huaisang dirty looks over.

The only problem here, of course, was that Jin Rusong was dead.

Or, rather…he was supposed to be dead.

And if Jin Rusong was here – here, in the rendezvous point where Xue Yang put those of his prospective victims that happened to be a little too young for even him to stomach killing, at least without the personal grudge that had driven him to slaughter the Chang clan in its entirety – that meant only one thing.

Jin Guangyao had ordered his own son to be murdered.

Through demonic cultivation, no less, which was a pretty nasty way to go. There was a reason everyone implicitly countenanced Jiang Cheng’s vendetta against demonic cultivators no matter where they were, even when he ignored all territory lines and forgot to not ask for permission – the things a demonic cultivator gone bad could do were just so much worse than what anyone else could that they couldn’t risk any delay in dealing with the problem.

Well, shit, Nie Huaisang thought, even as he comforted Jin Rusong, petting the toddler’s back to try to get him to calm down. What do I do now?

-

“There has to be a reason,” Nie Huaisang insisted. “He’s not rabid. Songsong was his son!”

“Sect Leader Nie, we can’t find anything that might explain it.”

“Look harder. I don’t care how minor it is, I want to know everythingto do with Songsong. Every little detail – every person who saw him – every medical report, every compliment, every good grade –”

“He placed last in one of his classes,” one of his spies volunteered.

“What?”

“He placed last in one of his classes. About two months before his ‘assassination’, and shortly before his father started collecting evidence against the other sects that were in his way, which he later used to ‘prove’ that they had been involved in the alleged murder.”

“He wouldn’t kill his son for failing a class,” one of the others objected. “The kid’s barely more than a baby. What’s he expecting, genius from birth?”

“He’s a genius himself. Why not?”

“If everyone inherited everything directly from their parents, he’d be a whore.”

“He’d be a Jin. They’ve all got that nose, every one of them…”

“I heard he’s having the other Jin bastards killed. All of them, even the women…”

Something snapped in Nie Huaisang’s hands.

They all turned to look at him.

“Investigate Qin Su,” he said, looking down at the mess of wood and paper that had once been a fan. “Come to think of it, she has a Jin nose, too.”

-

“I don’t want to go!”

“I don’t want you to go, either,” Nie Huaisang said, feeling tired and also much more in sympathy with his poor older brother than he’d ever been while Nie Mingjue had been alive. “But you disobeyed me, and that means we don’t have a choice. You have to go.”

Nie Songsong looked down at the ground, his lip quivering. “I didn’t mean to…”

“You did,” Nie Huaisang said. “You have to own your decisions, Songsong. You can’t take them back once they’re done, no matter what the consequences. Not even if you feel bad, but definitely not because you feel bad for having to pay for what you did.”

“But…”

“No, Songsong. You cannot be in the Unclean Realm when – when he’s here.”

Nie Songsong hung his head.

“He’s not your father anymore,” Nie Huaisang said. “You know that, right?”

Nie Songsong nodded.

Nie Huaisang sighed and held out his hands, and his arms were full of a teary-eyed child a moment later.

“He loved you once,” Nie Huaisang murmured into his child’s hair. “I love you now. I wish I could give you more than that – I wish I could give you an answer, tell you why he didn’t love you enough to keep from doing what he did. But I can’t. All I can do…”

Is what I’m already doing.

“You’re enough, er-ge,” Nie Songsong whispered back. “You’re enough. I promise.”

-

“When will I get to go night-hunting?”

“You go night-hunting all the time,” Nie Huaisang grumbled. “You’re a fraction my age, and already my height, my weight, yet you wield a saber like my brother was around to raise you properly. You’re ruining my reputation, you know; now no one will believe that my incompetence comes from how short I am…”

“Not night-hunting with the rest of the sect, er-ge,” Nie Songsong said, rolling his eyes. “With other juniors!”

“Not long now,” Nie Huaisang said, looking down at the paper beneath his hands. It was all finally coming together. “Not long now. Just give er-ge a little more time to finish taking care of matters for da-ge, and you’ll be able to go night-hunting with anyone you like.”

-

“Er-ge! Are you all right? You look so pale…”

“I’m sorry,” Nie Huaisang whispered. “Songsong – I’m sorry. I’m so sorry –”

“What happened? Are you injured?” Nie Songsong demanded, already starting to pat him over, looking for wounds. “Er-ge, what’s wrong –”

“Your mother’s dead.”

Nie Songsong’s hands stilled.

“I told her about your heritage,” Nie Huaisang said, his lips numb. He’d never tried to hide it from Nie Songsong, although he’d introduced the subject very gradually and only once he thought that he’d be able to handle the revelation. “About your father – your grandfather. What they did. I wanted her to be angry at him, to turn against him, to distract him…instead, she killed herself.”

“Er-ge…”

“I shouldn’t have told her. If I knew –”

“Er-ge.”

“I should have brought her in earlier – told her about you surviving – I kept her from you for years –”

“Er-ge!”

Nie Huaisang looked at the child he had raised as a little brother the way his older brother had raised him, a father in everything but name, and who he had the constant feeling of having failed.

He wondered, as he always did, whether his brother had felt the same about him.

“Er-ge, it’s all right,” his little brother, his adopted son, said, and took his hands in his. “It’s all right. You tried, remember? Time after time, you tried to talk to her, but every single time you concluded that she would’ve told her husband instead of trusting you. She would’ve ruined everything. If she did that, I’d be dead all over again, and you with me.”

That had been what Nie Huaisang had concluded. That was why he’d never told her.

But…

“She’s your mother.”

“And you’re my er-ge. As long as you don’t die on me, too, it’ll be all right. Okay? It’ll be all right. It’ll be worth it in the end.”

Nie Huaisang shook his head. He’d already done so much, caused so much chaos and strife, and yet this moment – this was the step too far.

This was the first time he realized that he wasn’t sure he believed that it would be worth it anymore.

But by now…what else was left to do? There were no ways out of the plan he’d made himself; he’d designed it that way on purpose, because he’d known that if there was a way out, that snake would find a way to slither through it. He just hadn’t thought that he would be the one looking for it.

It didn’t matter.

He had to keep going.

His older brother deserved it, even if the younger one didn’t.

-

“I represent the Nie sect,” the young man – just about their age, though shorter than either of them – said with a smile. He seemed kind, gentle and polite, easy-going, but Lan Jingyi and Lan Sizhui looked at each other, and then at Jin Ling, who just scowled. “Can I come in?”

“Were you even invited?” Jin Ling asked in bitten off words. He was still bitter about some of the things that had happened in the Guayin Temple a month before, and of all them the one he was most bitter about was his second uncle’s retreat into seclusion – they were all upset about that.

“But it’s a discussion conference,” the young man said, blinking in confusion. “We’re a Great Sect. Why wouldn’t we be invited?”

In the face of such profound ignorance, there really wasn’t very much they could say, and eventually Lan Sizhui stepped forward with a smile, welcoming the young man – Nie Songsong, he introduced himself – into the Cloud Recesses.

Everything seemed fine for a little while. Lan Sizhui was able to talk to the people in charge of arranging juniors into finding another place for Nie Songsong to stay, although it would be a little delayed – Nie Songsong assured them that there was no issue – and as recompense they even showed him, at his request, a few of the main landmarks.

And then they turned around and their guest had disappeared.

“I knew he was up to no good!” Jin Ling exclaimed.

“Don’t jump to conclusions,” Lan Sizhui told him.

“I’m with Jin Ling,” Lan Jingyi said. “He seemed so nice and understated – just like you know –”

“Don’t talk about my little uncle,” Jin Ling hissed at him. “I know it’s true, but just – don’t, okay?”

“We should find where he went,” Lan Sizhui decided.

It took them a while, but in the end they found him in the most unexpected place: in the rooms their sect leader had chosen for his seclusion, sitting on the bed with Lan Xichen’s head on his shoulder, sobbing as if his heart had been broken.

“What are you doing?” Lan Sizhui exclaimed, unnerved even out of his own habitual politeness.

“I came to greet my uncle,” Nie Songsong said, his manner just as gentle and polite as it had been from the beginning, although it was now evident that he was as stubborn as a rock and not easy-going at all.

“Your uncle?” Lan Jingyi gaped. “How can he be your uncle?”

“You’re Sect Leader Nie’s son!” Jin Ling accused.

“I’m Sect Leader Nie’s little brother by adoption,” Nie Songsong corrected. “It’s through my father that he’s my uncle – and you my cousin, I suppose.”

“Your – father?”

“Oh, yes. My birth name, you see,” Nie Songsong said, “was Jin Rusong.”

-

“Why did you choose to reveal yourself?” Lan Sizhui asked. “Given that everyone knows – well –”

Nie Songsong finished the character he was writing and put down his brush. “Wondering if you should let it be known that you were born with the surname Wen?”

Lan Sizhui jerked in surprise, then flushed. “How did you – that didn’t come out in Guanyin Temple.”

“No, I knew it before,” Nie Songsong said. “My er-ge is very clever, you know.”

“Yes, I suppose I do...why do you call him brother? Shouldn’t he be uncle, or – or –”

“Uncle is probably right,” Nie Songsong said. “But he raised me like a son, just as his brother did for him.”

Lan Sizhui looked down at his hands.

“Why did he publicly reveal your background, knowing that you were still around?” he asked again. “Everyone will know. Who your father was, all those terrible things he did, his relationship with your mother –”

“Why shouldn’t he? He did do all those things, and he did have that relationship with my mother.”

“But what about you? What about your reputation –”

“Are you planning on sweeping Wen Ruohan’s grave?”

Lan Sizhui stared at him.

“He’s your grandfather, isn’t he?” Nie Songsong looked calmly back at him. “Who he was, all those terrible things he did –”

“That’s nothing to do with me!”

“And the crimes of my father are nothing to do with me. My er-ge gave me his surname, just as Hanguang-jun gave you his, and for the same reason – to cut us off from the sins of our original family.”

“I suppose that’s true. But – no one knew about you, just as no one knew about me until I told them, and I only told them because they were my friends. Why’d you tell us? Aren’t you worried we’d tell more people?”

“Of course I am,” Nie Songsong said. “I hope you don’t, of course, but you would’ve found out regardless – second uncle wasn’t exactly subtle in his grief. And I had to tell him.”

“Why? To bring him out of seclusion?” Lan Sizhui hesitated. “Do you care so much for him?”

“Of course not. The last time I met him, I was a small child, and my father was just about to order me murdered; that’s not much of a basis to build a relationship. But having him lock himself away like that, as if he were in mourning…it hurt er-ge. And I won’t let anything hurt my er-ge. Anything, or anyone.”

They looked at each other for a long moment.

“I understand,” Lan Sizhui said.

“I’m glad you do,” Nie Songsong said, and then smiled. “I would’ve had to escalate to threats next, and I’m given to understand that I’m too short to really pull them off properly.”

Lan Sizhui snorted. “I think we’ve all learned that that’snot true.”

-

“Should we talk about this?” Jin Ling asked, arms crossed over his chest and glaring.

“What do you want to talk about?” Nie Songsong replied.

“How about the fact that your father tried to kill me?”

“Sure. Can we talk about the fact that you got all of his affection for years and years after he tried to kill me?”

Jin Ling blanched.

“I wonder if he would’ve gotten me a dog, too,” Nie Songsong mused. “I was too young for that when he ordered his demonic cultivator to feed me to fierce corpses and have my body ravaged until it was barely recognizable…but sure, let’s talk about how he tried to kill you.”

“I was talking about Sect Leader Nie!”

“Well, then, you should have been more specific. Sect Leader Nie’s my brother, not my father.”

“He’s a whole generation older than you!”

“My little uncle, then.”

Jin Ling flinched. “That’s worse. Go back to calling him your brother.”

Nie Songsong shrugged. “Would it help if we fought?”

“…what?”

“It makes me feel better, sometimes. Besides, I may be short, but I’m pretty good with the saber. I bet I could match your sword…maybe not your arrows. But I’ve always wanted to try.”

Jin Ling looked at him suspiciously for a long moment.

“Okay,” he finally said. “Sure. Why not?”

-

“I really hate that you’re kind of cool,” Lan Jingyi told him.

“I am so cool,” Nie Songsong said, and passed him another jar of wine. “Want to see my spring book collection?”

“…yes please.”

-

“Thank you for taking care of him,” Lan Xichen said to Nie Huaisang, who shrugged. “I’m sorry that you couldn’t trust me to help.”

“It’s only what I should have done,” Nie Huaisang said, not for the first time. He’d said it so often these past few days that it felt like a new refrain, an alternative to the old I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know. He preferred the original. “I was his little uncle, remember? I held him on his first month party. How could I do any less?”

He did not say that Lan Xichen, who could be classified as Jin Rusong’s older uncle, had done much less, but from Lan Xichen’s expression, he’d taken it that way anyway.

“You never…” Lan Xichen hesitated. “Did you ever have any – concerns?”

“That he’d turn out an idiot? No. I figured he’d be in good company, with me.”

“That’s not what I meant!”

“Oh, you meant whether I was worried that he’d grow up longing for his blood family over his adopted family and turn against me in favor of his real father?” Nie Huaisang asked mildly. “No, not really. The memory of your father ordering you to be mauled by fierce corpses and to make sure your face is destroyed so that there’s a reason to refuse to let your mother see the body, as it would only upset her, is a fairly effective panacea against things like that.”

“No,” Lan Xichen said, though he looked sick all over again at the reminder of how considerate Jin Guangyao could be when it came to those he thought of as people, and how monstrous he was towards those he didn’t. “No, just – your brother always took such a hard line against the Wen sect…”

“Because they were raised with the philosophy that they were superior to the rest of us and my brother purposefully made himself into the symbol of their fallibility, thereby making himself and all the rest of us the primary target for their traumatic realization that they’re just as weak and vulnerable as everyone else,” Nie Huaisang said, rolling his eyes. “Our Nie sect cultivators were always especially targeted whenever we were captured – our survival rate as prisoners of war was less than half all the other sects, and it wasn’t just because we were usually more injured when we got caught. Even the civilians surnamed Wen would pull out knives and try to stab us in the back if they had half a chance! We were in a blood feud with them, er-ge. You don’t put down blood feuds just like that, not even if you want to. That’s not how it works.”

Lan Xichen nodded slowly, thoughtful.

“Anyway, Songsong is mine now,” Nie Huaisang said. “Just as Lan Sizhui is your brother’s, and Jin Ling Jiang Cheng’s. Can’t we all just agree to not care about the rest?”

“I suppose we have to,” Lan Xichen said, bowing his head. “Huaisang…did you ever think about what happens now? I mean – what should we do next?”

“I don’t know,” Nie Huaisang said, and smiled humorlessly when Lan Xichen looked at him. “I’m not joking. I didn’t know what to do when I got Songsong for the first time, er-ge, and I don’t know what to do now, either. I just wanted to see justice done for my da-ge, and I did, and for the rest – I don’t know.”

“That’s fine,” Lan Xichen said. “I don’t know, either.”

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, Nie Huaisang thought. Spine as steel as your saber.

“Would you like to come visit the Unclean Realm sometime?” he asked, pretending to be casual. “Perhaps we can figure out what we don’t know together. If you like.”

“…perhaps I will,” Lan Xichen said.

#mdzs #nie huaisang #xue yang #lan xichen #jin rusong #jin ling #lan sizhui #lan jingyi #my fic #my fics #nothing ventured nothing gained

[makeste]

i don't get it tbh. the apology shouldn't have been here. it was in the middle of everything and it had basically no impact on deku whatsoever? this was sooooo no what i was expecting and tbh i'm kinda mad about it ngl lol also ngl times twice but if whatever ochaco says does reach him instead of the kacchan apology that's been built up as the emotional climax for the entire series i'm just flat out gonna drop this manga lmao. but this was barely an emotional climax at all, i really don't get it

2/2 like we get just a few pages? shoved in there like "okay everyone talked now kacchan disappears from the chapter, that's over and done with, moving on" the apology itself was great, but the placement and brevity undermined its emotional resonance. deku remains the exact same after hearing it, doesn't think about katsuki at all. just about his earlier "can't keep up" words? then we go on to ochaco whose "saving heroes even though that's what everyone has been doing" i guess is more important?

3/3 (last one promise) like i'm sorry but there was time for several chaps of endeavor ugly crying, for mineta's anal beads and pervy romantic trope non-confession, for overhaul to pop up being his usual piece of shit self for no plot-relevant reason, for adult top heroes to stand around for chapters like "huh everything we're doing is awful. let's keep on trusting this smelly kid" and. a few panels for kacchan apology. no reaction. shoved among "idk u well mido but stay!" + ochaco making faces

4/4 (i lied) and all this after katsuki's distress and emotions were once more made into jokes at the hospital, emotional consequences of the war ignored, w all might probably dying and the last thing he did to this kid was ditch him leaving us to guess he maybe gives a shit abt him and maybe he bothered to visit in the hospital cuz they sure didn't show shit. i honestly feel like all katsuki stuff was shoved into the background: krbk friendship for mina, dkbk for ofa, name reveal for jokes...

okay, so I have talked in the past about fandom reacting like Miette whenever this stuff happens, and tbh this is basically what I mean by that anon. there is no reason whatsoever to assume that this is the one and only reaction we'll ever get from Deku regarding the apology and that it will never come up again. this is 100% going to be revisited. and tbh I think it's a smart move on Horikoshi's part, because if he gave us everything in this one chapter then what further development would there be to look forward to? he's gotta hold something back so that we have that one last milestone to anticipate in the rebuilding of their relationship. I've often said that for me me, Deku and Kacchan's story is the most important part of BnHA. and so it makes sense to me for Horikoshi to not completely resolve it until close to the end of the series, if not the very end.

I think this is a pretty good compromise honestly, because I wasn't even sure if we were going to get the apology itself before the finale. but this way we can head into the final battle with Kacchan having put all of his character development out there and not holding anything back, and it's nice to have that, and to have that reinforcement of just how far he's come, and how serious he is about his atonement. and so his feelings are finally all on the table now, and now it's all Deku.

and he deserves to have some time to work out how he feels about this and not be put on the spot to deliver a reaction, honestly. but to say it had "no impact whatsoever" is a huge overreaction imo. first of all, we saw the shock on his face -- he was absolutely floored. this was something he clearly never expected from Kacchan (which is why it was so important for Kacchan to actually say the words, in addition to taking action as he's already done -- because Deku needed to hear them, because he genuinely had no idea that Kacchan actually cared. and he deserves to know that, because Kacchan is one of the most important people in the world to him). not to mention that Deku kind of has a million other things on his mind right now. like we just had a whole entire arc about that lol. the apology isn't supposed to be for Kacchan's benefit; it's supposed to be for Deku's. so let him have the time to absorb it before he settles on what to say. Kacchan had all the time in the world to figure out his part of it, after all.

to me this is like a promise that there will be at least one last great, emotional, and deeply personal moment between the two of them. because when Deku finally does forgives him -- not that he hasn't already, imo, but once they finally have that conversation -- that shit is going to be so fucking cathartic, and tbh I'm glad Horikoshi didn't try to cram that into this chapter along with everything else that's currently going on. besides, I'd rather see that part of their reconciliation happen once Deku is more back to his normal self again; I feel like it would be more meaningful that way. right now he's too exhausted to be able to come up with any words. but he already has shown the best possible reaction I could have ever hoped for -- complete and utter relief and trust. Kacchan is the person he trusted enough that he could finally let go of his fears and anxieties -- if only for a moment -- and give into his exhaustion at long last, and that moment where he collapses and Kacchan runs to catch him has instantly become one of my favorites in the whole series.

so yeah, my apologies anon, but absolutely nothing is gonna spoil that for me, and I can't join you here in being even remotely disappointed with this chapter. well aside from the lack of hug lol (but I can be patient for that as well).

#bnha 322 #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #bakudeku #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #asks #anon asks