#we need live mari reactions

[fabaceous]

yj should have a confessional room with a camera like on reality tv shows but mari is the only one who has access to it and at the end of every episode she gives us her hot takes on what just happened

#please im begging #at least have the actress do some in-character tiktoks like this #we need live mari reactions #yellowjackets

[kleefkruid]

Every fun post on here that encourages people to have hobbies/be creative always gets an avalanche of "Some people are poor Karen" type reactions and respectfully, you're all super annoying. I've never lived above the poverty line and this is a list of hobbies I have that were cheap or entirely free:

Read books: Go to the library, lend a book from a friend

knitting, crochet, embroidery: Get some needles from the bargan store and ask around, people have leftovers from projects they'll happily give you. Thrift stores also often carry leftover fabric and other supplies. And talk about your hobby loud enough and an old lady will show up and gift you their whole collection, because there are way more old ladies with a closet full of wool than there are grandchildren who want to take up the hobby.

Origami/paper crafts: get some scrap paper and scissors, watch a youtube tutorial

walking: put on shoes open door

pilates/yoga/etc: get a mat or just use your carpet, watch a youtube tutorial

Houseplants: look online for people that swap plant cuttings. There are always people giving out stuff for free to get you started. If you're nice enough you'll probably get extra

gardening: You're gonna need some space for this one of course but you can just play around with seeds and cuttings from your grocery vegetables.

aquarium keeping is a bit of an obscure one but I got most of my stuff second hand for cheap or free and now I have a few thousand euro worth of material and plants.

drawing/art: You get very far just playing with bargan store materials. I did my entire art degree with mostly those.

writing: Rotate a cow in your head for free

cooking: again one you can make very expensive, but there are many budget recipes online for free. Look for African or Asian shops to get good rice and cheap spices.

Join a non-profit: Cities will have creative organisations who let you use woodworking machines or screen presses or laser cutters or 3D printers etc etc etc for a small fee. Some libraries also lend out materials.

candle making: You need some molds (cheap), wick, two old cooking pots for au bain marie melting and a ton of scrap candles, ask people to keep them aside for you.

a herbarium, flower pressing: Leaves are free, wildflowers too, ask if you can take from peoples gardens.

puzzles: thrift stores, your grandma probably

Citizen science: look for projects in your area or get the iNaturalist app

And lastly and most importantly: Share! Share your supllies, share your knowledge. Surround yourself with other creative people and before you know it someone will give you a pot of homemade jam and when you want to paint your kabinet someone will have leftover paint in just the right color and you can give them a homemade candle in return and everyone is having fun and building skills and friendships and not a cent is exchanged. We have always lived like this, it's what humans are build to do.

And all of it sure beats sitting behind a computer going "No stranger, I refuse to let myself have a good time."

Anyway I'm logging off bc I'm making some badges for a friend who cooked for me and then I'm going to fix some holes in everyones clothes.

#hobbies #mental health

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

I'm forever losing my mind about s2e4, because I don't know about you all, but I expected them to drag the conflict out and I was so relieved they didn't.

It would have been such an easy choice to make Ed and Stede have lots of misunderstandings and accidentally hurt each other further. It would've been so easy I was expecting them to do it, even though I didn't like it or think it fit very well for Ed and Stede.

But they didn't take the path of easy conflict! The writers of OFMD fucking care so much about their story and their characters and it shows. Yes, Ed and Stede are tense with each other at first. Yes, they need to talk like adults. Yes, they're both emotionally constipated so that'll be tough. But they do it!

And the reason this works so well is because it makes it so immediately obvious that Ed and Stede just click so well that it's really hard for them to be upset with each other. "Can we not do this now?" Stede asks after Ed tells Anne and Mary how he "completely boned it" near the start of the episode, to which Ed responds "can do it any time I like!" Already, even with so little talking, they both seem to take it completely as a given that they're not going to just disappear from each other's lives.

And, yes, Ed gives Stede clear boundaries. He does not want to hear an explicit love confession yet, he makes it clear that he was already all in and Stede broke that trust, but he's deeply charmed and comforted when Stede shifts to "I love everything about you" instead. My absolute favorite moment this episode is after Anne and Mary tease Ed about his beard, and Stede tells him he likes it, and Ed gives him the softest little "thank you." He doesn't even want to look at Stede in that moment, but still, even after Stede has hurt him so badly and he doesn't yet have context for that, Ed doesn't doubt for a second that Stede's compliment is genuine or worry that Stede is trying to manipulate him back into his good graces with compliments.

And once they're starting to get on the same page with each other? Fuck, they're just so in sync so quickly, immediately a team when Anne and Mary start having a go at them. They're constantly glancing at each other, making little faces at each other, checking in on the other's reaction.

I don't doubt that Ed and Stede are going to butt heads every now and again. They both have big personalities and are very emotional and they'll know exactly what'll hurt most to say when they fight. But they both know they're completely safe with each other and they'd never mean to hurt each other. They're gonna be just fine.

#our flag means death #ofmd #fuck these boys! they're so good! they're made for each other your honor

[celluloidbroomcloset]

I wrote a bit ago why Stede's coming-out narrative resonated with me, but I was considering more about how it's different from a lot of coming-out narratives in mainstream media.

Cinematic coming-out narratives tend to centralize the more public aspect of the revelation—often coming from a character who has known about or discovered their sexuality earlier in the story, followed by their coming out to friends or family members (often to disparate reactions). But Stede’s coming out is a simultaneous moment of self-knowledge and openness with the one person in his English life with whom he has been most intimate, and who has been most damaged (other than himself) by him.

I’ve seen it mentioned elsewhere that it’s interesting to have a gay man ask a straight woman what it’s like to be in love and to have her words help to bring his repressed feelings into form. The entire sequence is an acknowledgment of Stede and Mary's affinity with each other, reinforced by the combination of intimacy and distance that is a part of their married life. It happens in an intimate setting, in their bedroom, but we've seen how very non-intimate the bedroom is, where they either barely touch in bed or crowd each other out, get dressed and undressed with their backs turned, and where Stede refuses to talk about his emotions or desires.

But in the coming-out scene, for the first time, we see warmth in their room. There's a fire, and both are in their night clothes; Mary's hair is down, and Stede is without his nightcap. The effect is that they're more apparently comfortable with each other, despite the circumstances, than they've ever been before. Stede realizes that his existence has stopped Mary from experiencing her life. He sees that she’s found something to be passionate about with her art, that she's in love with Doug, and he wants to understand her.

There’s an open question of whether Stede has known about his attraction to men and simply repressed it or tried to ignore it, or whether he wasn't even aware of it. The sexual freedom fostered on the Revenge doesn’t seem to include his own sexuality. His relationship with Ed progresses like a friendship - and while they perform things like a divorce, it never appears that Stede is consciously aware that his feelings are not solely friendship, but sexual attraction and romantic love.

Which makes sense if we note that Stede has no friends, certainly no close ones, at home. He can sit in a pub and talk to people, but he’s not close to them (he’s isolated at the head of the table, rather than in the center of the group, and even mocked when he's the center of attention). The closest person he has to a friend is Mary, with whom he has to live and who also struggles to understand him. He doesn’t know what friendship really feels like, either.

Stede has no one else that he could be honest with, or even hope to talk to beyond superficialities. Even then, it takes an extreme act, starting with his rant at the art gallery and ending with her trying to kill him, to break down the barriers enough for them to talk. Where Stede is able to talk more intimately with Lucius and Frenchie and Ed, it takes near death for him to talk to his wife.

Certainly the coming out seems to be not a discovery of feelings but an actualization of them. Mary’s description puts into words what he's been experiencing, possibly his whole life. And for Stede, words and stories are deeply powerful—they're the way he enters into pirate life, the way he tries to understand himself and others. Talking, reading, and writing are fundamental parts of his self-expression, and so his coming out occurs through a story another person tells him. He plays pirates with his children, he reads to the crew, he asks for Ed's stories, he talks himself into roles like "the Gentleman Pirate." He participates in stories as a way of expressing the reality of who he is and who he wants to be. He needs to be able to put his feelings into words before he can ever fully express them.

So often cinematic coming-out scenes are framed as dangerous—how the other person, or people, will react. But there's no danger here. The danger is that Stede won't embrace the feelings that he has, which is put to rest even as Mary talks and we see the images of his past with Ed.

The scene centralizes Stede, not Mary, but it also does not ignore her. There’s no hesitation when he says “...I think I have,” or when he says, “His name is Ed.” Neither line is thrown off as an afterthought—he meets Mary’s eyes, he emphasizes his words. He’s clear that he’s talking about a man. He simultaneously comes out to her and to himself.

It is important that she's present for that, because Stede does need someone else to hear his words. He's a storyteller, and he needs to draw others into the stories that have formed such a part of his life. It isn't so much that Stede needs someone to perform to, but someone to enter the story with him, to make the words real.

Here, Mary draws him into her story of being in love. And he in turn asks her to hear the beginning of the story that he's concealed from everyone, including himself: "His name is Ed."

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd meta #stede bonnet #mary bonnet #gif #edward teach #gentlebeard #blackbonnet #rhys darby #claudia o'doherty #coming out narratives #coming out #queer community #queer

[magics-neptunes-things]

Turmeric or Turmeric? (Prompt)

Hi guys!

You can find the request for this one here :) And the prompt here too!

For the context, it was from a TikTok Mary Earps posted a few weeks ago. Mary, Maya and Alessia were supposed to drink an awful thing with turmeric, pepper and others horrible ingredients.

Enjoy!

TW : None, pur fluff.

______________________________________________________________

"We are the hot shot threesome" Mary says happily before getting up to cut the camera on her phone, finishing her TikTok.

"I need some lip balm" Maya says before starting to look for it in her bag.

Alessia, on her side, falls on the bed with a moan of discomfort. Unlike Mary who seems to have enjoyed the content of the "shot" and Maya who drank it in one shot, she had more difficulty drinking it in its entirety. And did it only under the insistence of her teammates, not to kill the fun.

"Is she dead?" Mary asks Maya, laughing.

Smiling softly, Maya leans towards the blonde to pinch her ribs, making her growl while pushing her hand back.

"No, she looks okay" Maya laughs softly

Still with a grimace on her face, Alessia sits back on the bed to grab the bottle of tea and drink new long sips, hoping to pass the horrible taste that remains in her mouth.

"It was awful" says Alessia with a grimace before finally getting up

"It was really not good" confirms Maya, drinking too from the bottle.

"You are babies. I liked it" Mary says

Alessia smiles softly shaking her head. Heading towards the door, she is about to greet her friends when Mary jump from the bed in her turn.

"Where are you going?"

"Find Y/N. Why, you have another horrible challenge to offer me?" teases Alessia.

"No, but I have a better idea" Mary replies with a huge smile that really doesn't announce anything good.

********

"Mary there is no way in the world that I'm doing that to my girlfriend" Alessia frown.

"Come oooon, it could be fun!"

Alessia turns to Maya hoping to get some help, but she just smiles and shrugs. She understands Alessia’s reluctance but on the other hand she cannot help but find Mary’s idea rather amusing.

"Come on Less, all you have to do is find Y/N and kiss her so we can see her reaction"

"But I didn’t even wash my teeth" Alessia whines

"That’s the point" smiled Mary

"She’ll never want to kiss me again after that"

"Oh I wouldn’t worry about that if I were you" laughs Maya gently. "Y/N has been crazy about you for years, long before you opened your eyes to the nature of your respective feelings."

Alessia groan for any answer. Maya is right and she knows it, you have developed a crush for her for years, maybe even since the first time you saw her. But until a year ago, when Alessia’s behavior towards you changed, you were content to live one-way feelings, dating around, hoping to get over the feelings you had for Alessia. It never worked out.

Seeing that Alessia begins to hesitate, Mary leads the attacker into the common room where you are. Sitting on a stool and leaning at the coffee bar, you are in full discussion with Esme when the trio arrives at the entrance of the room.

"But she’s busy! She’s talking to Esme, I don't want to interrupt" Alessia tries, hoping to escape what she was asked.

"For God’s sake, Alessia, go kiss your girlfriend"

Alessia sighs gently and shakes her head before shyly entering the room. Satisfied, Mary grabs her phone to film the scene. She can thus have a perfect vision of Alessia’s hesitant steps in your direction.

For your part, you end up spotting the silhouette of your girlfriend who approaches you. You address her a big smile while still talking to Esme.

Before you really understand what is happening, Alessia finally arrives next to you and positions herself between Esme and you who are face to face on your respective stools. Even sitting, thanks to your seat, your face is almost the same height as Alessia's who is standing.

Alessia gently grabs your face by taking it in her hands and gently raises your chin before putting a kiss on your lips. You blow your nose under surprise, usually you don’t kiss in public. Unlike hugs or gestures of affection, it's not uncommon to see Alessia’s arms around your waist or to see you sleep on the shoulder of the blonde during your trips or movie nights.

Your arm passed around her waist, you look for Alessia's eyes after your kiss that lasts a few seconds and you prepare to question her before frowning. Her lips taste strange, far from the sweet taste they usually have.

"Did you eat something special?" you ask your girlfriend curiously.

But Alessia doesn't have time to answer that Mary’s laughter is heard. Maya appears smiling behind her and both of them approach you, drawing the attention of the other girls in the room.

"What’s going on?" you ask, a little lost.

Alessia informed you that she was going to do a TikTok with Mary and Maya, without really telling you what it was. When Mary throws you one of the bottles they drank and you catch it easily with your free hand.

"Hot shot threesome" Maya grins as you read the ingredients on the bottle with a grimace.

"I’m sorry Baby, they made me do it" Alessia plead, turning a little bit to look at Mary and Maya.

Mary snorts while you look up at Alessia with a little smile. She seems worried about your reaction, which really doesn’t matter. You’re pretty calm by nature, Esme is your best friend and it’s not for nothing.

"Don’t worry" you smile affectionately at her before gently kissing her cheek.

Alessia hums as she tightens against you, briefly pressing her temple against your forehead. You take the opportunity to deposit a new kiss, on the corner of her jaw this time.

You don’t really listen when Mary, Maya and Esme start talking about the drink and spicy food they’ve eaten so far. Alessia sometimes gets involved in the discussion as well. But you, you just watch your girlfriend. You’re obsessed with the blue of her eyes and the different features of her face. You feel your expression soften when she laughs and you pass your second arm around her waist after a few minutes.

It draws Alessia’s attention to look and smile at you, gently kissing your forehead.

God, you are so in love.

When Alessia shifts her attention back to the conversation, you listen to them with a distracted ear. You aren't surprised when Ella comes to mingle in the conversation, but you quickly turn away to admire Alessia. After so many years of trying to reason yourself about your feelings for her, you still can’t believe you can finally consider her "yours".

Unable to resist, you put your lips on her cheek again. Then you slide your lips all the way up to her jaw to finish in the hollow of her neck. You feel Alessia shivering, you know how sensitive she is here. Her hair is loose so no one can see what you just did, but Alessia is giving you a warning look.

"Sorry" you whisper softly before kissing her shoulder this time.

"Not here" whispers Alessia in return, forgetting in turn your teammates. "You can have all the kisses you want when we get back to the room"

"Mh… after you brush your teeth then. You taste weird" you smile maliciously.

"Don't talk about it… I didn’t want to finish, they forced me" Alessia pouts, very aware that she just drew Mary and Maya’s attention to you.

"Oh, really?" you coos, kissing your girlfriend’s cheek again.

"Yes, they were very mean"

"My poor little love" you laugh softly, gently tightening Alessia in your arms.

"You’re so dramatic" Mary sighs.

But Alessia gives her an ironic smile as you continue to hold her protectively against you. The blonde even lets herself go a little against you, standing impossibly close to you. Mary rolls her eyes and throws a ball napkin in your direction.

"Can't you stop two seconds from reminding others how single they are for god's sake?"

#woso x reader #woso imagine #alessia russo #alessia russo x reader #alessia russo imagine #woso one shot #woso fanfics

[sunflowersoap]

back on my bullshit once again. thinks about how the headspace gangs reaction to starting to forget basil can probably tell you a lot about them.

for example, aubrey being EXTREMELY protective over that flower crown. her absolute rage at kel for kicking it off. her thinking "it used to belong to someone, we should return it." very similar to "how DARE basil ruin all our photos! they used to belong to all of us, and he throws us all out like we were nothing! he doesn't even care! he turned his back on all of us! on mari! she used to be here! she used to be a part of our lives! you think just because she isn't here you can just throw everything away? why don't you care? why don't you CARE?!"

her attachment to objects makes me think she values gift giving as a love language. this thing was so important to them, so I'll give it back. I'll give them this to show I care. this thing is special. it's not just an object to her, it's a physical display of their affection. so losing that object feels like losing the last bit of that love.

her being so intent on returning that flower crown even if it's broken and damaged. because someone loved it, so it must be special. her extreme protectiveness was still there, but now it was in a more destructive way. she's so protective of mari and her memory that she assumes the worst of everyone, because everyone pulling away and abandoning her or acting like everything was okay didn't just feel like a betrayal to her. she felt like they were betraying mari. that's why it pissed her off so bad when kel said think of how mari would feel. because oh, NOW you want to think of how mari would feel? NOW??

kel remembering the pictures also sticks out to me. he remembers basils words, even if his memories are so foggy. he has an attachment to those memories. this can also possibly tell us something about him. he doesn't hold on to objects as much as aubrey does, but those memories are everything to him. he listens, he holds all those moments so close to him. even when he's forgetting basil, he remembers all those little quirks he loves. he listened intently to basil, he cherished every single moment. he remembers his favorite things and why he does things and little details about him. even if he's forgetting the fact basil takes pictures, he remembers that they have pictures and WHY they were taken. his focus isn't really on the photo album in the real world. it's on the fact basil is sad and aubrey is so much different. his attachment isn't about the object. it's about the fact it means a lot to BASIL. that's why he wants it back. it makes basil happy. he doesn't understand why aubrey would do it, because his attachment was never to the album. it was "this makes basil happy and brings him joy. he loves this thing. he loves talking about it." so he memorized all his rambling about it. he isn't as attached to the album itself as aubrey is. it wasn't about the photos to kel, it was about spending time with basil. so to him, aubrey's anger seems irrational. it's honestly kinda like different love languages. hers is gift giving, his is quality time. so it doesn't make sense to him. it's basils thing. why would she steal it? it's his passion.

hero, if I'm recalling correctly, doesn't really need to be reminded of basil at the last resort. even while he's forgetting him more and more, he's keeping the group on task. he's bringing up the worry about forgetting things about basil. he looks out for basil. he's trying to keep the group positive. that's what he's trying to do. looking out for basil even when everything's becoming a blur. protecting him even when he isn't there. that's how you see heros love for basil manifest. protecting him. he jumps in to save basil with no hesitation. he tries to solve the fight between aubrey and basil. he looks out for basils health and safety. even if he doesn't know much about basil anymore, even if he's changing, he looks out for him. no matter how difficult it is, he protects him. because if basil can't protect himself, he'll do it. because basils his best friend and he loves him and he needs someone who looks out for him. if basil can't protect himself, he'll help as much as he can. even when he can barely remember him, he remembers he needs his help and THATS enough to keep going.

sunny? simple. he knows basil so fucking well. he knows basil talked to him about things he never talked to about anything else. he's terrified about something happening to basil, enough to have so many rooms of him dying horribly as worst fears. he feels like he can't save their relationship so he runs from it. he knows all of basils worst fears. he knows how trusting basil was of him. he knows how much basil cared about "who he thought he was" (despite what his mental illness makes him think, it's who he IS. not what he thinks he is.) he knows basil like the back of his own hand. he knows his worst traits, he knows his worst fears, he knows his pains and his insecurities and his guilt and his grief. THATS how sunny expresses care and his love language. knowing someone to that degree and listening.

I don't really know where I'm going with this. I just think this game and the way different characters show love is very interesting.

#omori spoilers #omori #basil omori #omori basil #omori kel #kel omori #aubrey omori #omori aubrey #omori analysis #omori sunny #sunny omori #omori hero #hero omori

[slyscoutess]

BLOUKOUT || FORMULA 1

I think we're all chronically online enough here to know what's going on, and rightly so, on TikTok right now, but don't worry, if for some reason you've been in a cave the last few days and haven't heard , let me explain everything with such precision.

In recent days, the Met Gala 2024 was unveiled, and with it celebrities from all lists came together with a single cause, to put themselves in the spotlight with exaggerated clothes and a ticket more expensive than yours and my life. Among these was the influencer hayleyybaylee, an American influencer who thought it would be wise to record, edit and publish a video with her exaggerated clothes, heading to a dance that only the elite within the biggest elites have the right to go to, in the audio of the video? a line that is certainly historically excruciating.

while Rafah, the only theoretically safe place, or at least that was what had been promised to the Palestinian people, was being completely bombed, Hayley was publishing a video with the audio of Marie Antoinette: “let them eat cake”. If you, like me, are a history lover, you know well the episode in history that the French people lived from then on.

With the memory of this audio, we reclaim our power as the people in control, we gave these people the platform and from these people we can take the platform away at any time we want. If the government and the rich are not giving their time to those in need, we will need to force their gaze in the direction we want.

Here we have a term: the people for the people.

because it's literally all we have.

with that, we brought our guillotines outside and decided to take from them what they don't know how to use; their voices and their platforms. blokout2024 is a line that anyone can participate in, the best way to help is to share lists and that includes your own, but it was bothering me how there were names that never appeared there, the formula 1 drivers.

These playboys who spend the year doing Vrom Vrom don't pay attention to anything that doesn't affect them and this was seen with the whole Christian Horner harassment case and some of the reactions to this case. It's time to demand some responsibility from them, they are not babies, they are not children, they are men who are always ready to defend harassers and say that they respect racists and criminals.

“but love, boys can't talk about it” Sir Lewis Hamilton, as always and once again, proved that they can. the man continues to publish links and news about Palestine, and this is not recently, and we know that when Lewis makes donations, he is not in the habit of taking a stand on them, just as he recently did for the Brazilian people with the case of Rio Grande do Sul, the other pilots and their partners just don't care. not to mention the teams and their bosses. This even affects the Formula 1 Academy, with Charlotte Tilbury as a sponsor and frequently in the paddock, for those who don't know, Charlotte recently fired Bella Hadid, a Palestinian woman, for protesting and continuing to speak about the country of her blood and family.

remembering that there are convinced Zionists within the paddock, such as Lance Stroll's girlfriend, sister and brother-in-law, the latter is also Daniel Ricciardo's best friend. Tell me who you hang out with and I'll tell you who you are.

I'm not here telling you to stop liking your favorites, I'm not here telling you to stop watching the races, I love some of these and it will hurt me to block them, but not as much as it hurts me to know that they close their eyes and remain quiet in all their luxury, I'm here saying that we need to demand a position from these men and women, we were the ones who gave them the platform, how many people in Palestine can be fans of these people who ignore their suffering on a daily basis? so keep writing fanfics, follow the gossip pages, but the officials need to take a stand

If even the swifties are doing it, why can't we do it?

Let’s Start Big:

BLOCK

FIRST HALF || SECOND HALF

HONORARY MENTION

LN4 |

LN Rancing Kart |

Lando JPG |

Lando Movie |

Quadrant |

Max Fewtrell |

Lec |

F1Academy |

Nico Rosberg |

Romain Grosjean |

Jenson Button |

Kimi Räikkönen |

Sebastian Vettel |

Mick Schumacher |

Magui Corceiro |

Ollie Bearman |

Liam Lawson |

James Vowles |

Bianca Bustamante |

Sky Sports F1 |

Zak Brown |

Christian Horner |

CS55 Racing |

Arrow McLaren |

1 paper cut doesn't really hurt, but 28 million paper cuts can kill you. Let's fucking hit the pentagon, only follow trought fan accounts.

We, the damned of the earth, have only each other. And that will be enough.

#art by: Henry James Garrett #formula 1 #formula one #f1 #lando norris #charles leclerc #carlos sainz #lewis hamilton #george russell #fernando alonso #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 fanfiction #f1 x you #sebastian vettel #logan sargeant x reader #charles leclerc x reader #sebastian vettel x reader #carlos sainz x reader #lando norris x reader #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x reader #lance stroll #logan sargeant #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc fluff

[lover-of-mine]

Me? Wanting to talk about the locker room scene in comparison to the cemetery scene to make a point no one asked about? Raise your hand if you saw this is coming 🙋‍♀️

Anyway, this is madness written by a gifmaker/video editor who hates coloring the cemetery scene with a burning passion and who spent the better part of the past 2 days trying to make a coloring work for the locker room scene, who also did some asking around with other editors who also seem to be having issues with the scene, and who spends way too much time thinking about Buck and death (someone drown that man, please).

I'm gonna start this off by saying that I don't really believe the cemetery scene will be directly addressed on the show no matter how much I wish it would. But something about the cemetery scene besides the actual content of the scene that keeps me up at night and had me writing multiple fics dealing with it, is the fact that the sky is only blue behind Eddie.

Why is that relevant in any way, shape, or form? The colors when the focus is on Buck or both of them have this almost yellowish tone that the focus on Eddie doesn't have. The sky and colors strongly imply that they added a filter to it in post-production to ensure the colors looked like that, along with the fact that it is a scene that's really weird to color something that happens when they go too hard on the filters *cough* crossover *cough* pilot *cough*. What does that have to do with the locker room? The locker room also has this almost yellowish tone that makes it hell to color. But based on my 2 days of testing different colorings and techniques, it seems to be a hell of a lot worse when the shot has that wall over there where the sun is hitting as a background.

That suggests that they wanted the scenes to have a specific lighting that they achieved later. Considering the way that the tendency of the cemetery is that the colors get muted or weirdly blended together and that the locker room goes YELLOW, I am assuming that they messed with the colors on the cemetery to make the colors look faded, giving it that gloomy feeling, which in turn made the sky almost white, and that they needed that sunlight reflecting on the wall to look that bright, which made the scene look a lot more yellow than it should. Seriously, trying to work this out I legit make it look like Buck is a Simpsons character.

Okay, but Anna, why did you make this particular connection? Well, the word is muted when Buck is talking about starting to date Natalia and then the sun gets brighter when he talks about them breaking up? COME ON. He's calling the relationship boring and the word literally gets brighter as he says it, madness.

Buck talking about dating Natalia -> Buck talking about breaking up with Natalia (please don't judge the gifs I don't want the stress of coloring them combined right now lol)

But that's the same reaction. Dude is smiling going in, he's smiling going out.

And considering Buck's relationship with his own death and the way I strongly believe that what drew him to Natalia was the fact that she didn't think his death was a tragedy and he wasn't ready to deal with the reality of had happened to him yet, to get him to the point where death is boring is progress. Makes me fear for my Buck breakdown wishes, but it is progress for that particular aspect of Buck, considering he has a very intricate relationship with death down to the fact he was born as a hail mary to prevent it. We have multiple near-death experiences, we have him saving the lives of people loves multiple times, the first time we see him he's saving a kid who drowned, his first big conflict is the fact that he's not handling not being able to save someone's life all that well, I can keep going, but you see my point, right?

The arc with Natalia, even though we didn't see the originally planned conclusion since the actress couldn't come back, had this point of Buck looking at what happened to him through the eyes of someone who didn't know him before and was actually excited about that happening, so he could distance himself from what happened and look at it from a "safe" distance. That distance also allowed him to ignore the very important "I need to do this for myself" thing from the coma dream because Buck is terrified of being alone, and that definitely includes the fear of finding out who he is by himself. Buck is bad at being alone, from meaningless sex, to hanging on to Abby too long, to hanging on to Taylor too long, to jumping in with Natalia, the first pretty girl who looked his way, it all makes this part of him very clear (parenthesis because I just had a thought, yes, Buck latches on to Taylor out of fear of being alone triggered by Eddie almost dying, but he thought he could have died himself considering the crane and everything about it and also the way he could very much have been shot at the same time as Eddie, he latched on to Natalia because he did die, he also almost died on his first date with Abby and Abby actually reached out to him when he was feeling all sorts of bad over someone dying, and he is held at gunpoint and watched a death that deeply affected him before he started dating Ali, so we have death as a connection here too, if that makes sense, I might have to come back to this thought later).

But the thing is, when you look at 6a for Buck considering the fact that Buck is passively suicidal, in a very I'm not trying to get killed but I don't think I don't care if I do die way, and how he probably thought he was going to die in a blaze of glory saving someone, and how he actually died in a pretty run-of-the-mill call, by something no one has any control over it, Buck's relationship with what he thought death was and would be for him changed. For one, Buck was not ready for how much it affected everyone around him, he never considered what the grief of losing him would do to the people he loves, but also, Buck's main excuse for his near-death experiences/impulsive behavior that puts him in mortal danger was "but I didn't actually die" like with the blood clots or "I didn't get the worst of it" like with the shooting, I think even the tsunami a little bit with how he felt about losing Chris. But he did actually die, and considering the fact that he went up that ladder when Chimney was ready to go up and Eddie also got hit by the lightning, he also got the worst of it. So he lost his own coping mechanism.

So he arrived at a point where death is boring and he is smiling like an idiot at Eddie welcoming him "back to the world of the living" and that could have fun implications going forward. Because, one, he still hasn't dealt with a big emotion in a healthy way, and two, Bobby is in mortal danger. Considering his reaction to Bobby being dead in his coma world and the fact that he has no coping mechanism left when it comes to death anymore along with his own relationship with water and danger we could have some fun reactions to these types of triggers for him there.

And thinking about the way Oliver keeps talking about Buck learning more about himself and also about Buck leaning on Eddie, someone who had his own journey dealing with multiple layers of his relationship with death, they have a fun space to play with there, with Buck's relationship with death, Eddie's relationship with Buck's death, and everything else that could happen with Eddie fully dealing with Shannon's death, and Buck dealing with anything really, Daniel, his own death, his fear of being alone, all as someone who actually wants to live, who's not just moving because he's alive and has no other alternative.

That's it for today, as always, if you reached this I love you 💜

#im going to bed now #911 meta #911 spoilers #911 speculation #buck

[destinyandcoins]

ALSO the show draws a very clear line between how Ed acts when he's upset and processes his emotions and how Blackbeard acts when he's gone off the deep end.

Ed repeatedly retreats, hides himself somewhere safe, and tries to process his feelings of inadequacy and hurt. we see it when he hides in Stede's bathtub, when he hides in the blanket fort, when he leaves dinner at Mary and Anne's to curl up on the sofa under a blanket. FURTHERMORE we see Ed post-Kraken turn in s1 and in the first episodes of s2 crying alone in the captain's cabin, sighing wistfully over the wedding cake toppers, and just generally being a sad little lump of a man who is hurting

the violence Blackbeard displays is only ever in public, performative. He cuts Izzy's toe off in s1 to announce his return to this aggressive, violent persona that Izzy has demanded of him. He pushes the crew to violently raid ships and gets in Frenchie's face to intimidate him and shoots Izzy and makes Archie and Jim fight each other. and part of that is him pushing them to kill him in a way he can't bring himself to do (he always outsources the big job), but it's very important to remember that the way Ed reacts to being left by Stede and the way Blackbeard is being violent and traumatizing the crew are two different things entirely.

one is a reaction to being left by the man he loves and feeling unlovable, and the other is the direct result of being told he needs to be a monster and an extended performance of being that monster (and way of shielding himself from the threat to himself Izzy presents at the end of s1).

Ed and Stede are both men desperate to be seen and understood for who they are and not what people have told them to be. Stede tries to create a pirating environment that embraces softness and talking about your feelings, but he's still so caught up in running from himself and his problems that he has to go home and fix things with his family before he can truly live that way. Ed is suffering and feels like a monster because he's been told his only worth is being this fearsome pirate persona, and being that thing hurts, so he makes sure everyone else becomes that thing and hurts along with him.

it's not until the final episode that Ed realizes being a fearsome thing doesn't have to hurt, being capable of violence doesn't mean you are a monster, sometimes it's a thing you are (a thing you do) to protect the ones you love. you're not a dick, life's a dick; you're not your father just because you're capable of violence, you're a man who has something worth fighting for

#someone with talent for graphics make a ''when's a monster not a monster? oh when you love it'' re: ed and his own acceptance of self pls #ed teach #our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd meta #look. i came to this cafe to work on my term papers and study for my final #it's not MY fault i got distracted by ofmd feelings. that was inevitable i think #lmao i like how i started this in response to several other posts i've seen in the last couple days #so it comes across as picking up mid-conversation even though the conversation is just me talking to myself for 20 minutes

[bluemari23]

Hello Mari, how are you? I was very happy with the new notifications! Your writing is one of my favorites🙃❤️.

If you feel comfortable, could you write a headcanon aimed at the BTS members where we are the boys' romantic interest, being the 8th in the group? Maybe a foreign member.

NOTE: Thank you very much for your attention! I'm happy to see you back, a big hug❤️.

Hello! thank you so much!

and i took this almost as a poly idea the second i read it, so thats kind of how i wrote your ask if that's okay! :)

bf!namjoon who constantly tries to hide negative comments about you during live, not wanting you to see any hate for being their 8th member. He and the boys know that your relationship with them is a secret, but cant help but to still try to protect you from anything and everything. Knows when something is wrong during an interview and immediately will send a signal to their manage that the interview is over. Tries to be a confidant to you and help you integrate into idol society as their new member.

bf!jin who just tries to do whatever he can to help you in any way. "Oppa will do it". Knows you are independent but loves to help you with the little things like opening a jar of pickles. Will keep snacks near by for you knowing how you tend to stress eat. Will forever be your cooking buddy despite you loving to bake. Wants to try to bake for you but you might need to help him not put too much baking soda into the baked good.

bf!yoongi who may not show it, but is so in love with you that he knows everything. he is so observant and knows exactly how you like your orange peeled (with none of the white stuff left because you can't stand the texture of it). Loves that you will hold his whenever he wants and for as long as he wants. Will never move first when cuddling on the couch, waiting until you make the first move. Is the first to sense something wrong by watching your facial expressions and body movements (like how you rub your fingers together when nervous or anxious).

bf!hoseok who takes extra time to help you learn all of their choreography so you don't falll behind with their new music/choreo. Is the best at getting you up and out of bed when you feel down from the hate youre getting online. will bring you your favorite coffee/tea when he knows you have an early morning. buys you your wardrobe (along with jimin) as they both want to dress you and take pride in the fact that you were the clothes they buy you. loves to dress you up in matching outfits.

bf!jimin who is very cuddly and affectionate. loves to lean on you and have you lean on him. spends a lot of time just being a buddy while you do chores or are getting ready for a schedule. just loves to being your ocmpany, not needing anything planned. will just lay in bed with you for hours, keeping you from stewing too long on things not in your control. stops the company from putting you on a diet for their next comeback because you are absolutely perfect to him and the boys.

bf!taehyung who loves to go explore with you. any new city you guys go to he likes to take you out to explore life in the city and find new places. loves to buy you accessories like scarves and sunglasses because then you guys match. taehyung who reads out all the "marry me y/n" and maybe makes some up just to see you smile and politely decline. loves trying to get a reaction out of you and maybe tag teams with jungkook to see who could get you flustered the most first.

bf!jungkook who loves to assert his dominance and "throw you around". loves to pick you up in his arms and throw you onto the couch or bed before smothering you in kisses. keeps you favorite treat in his bag so he can share it with you before jin sees. loves to do karaoke sessions with you on live and gets frequently caught by army staring at you in awe. jungkook who insists on sharing verses with you because he loves how your two voices mesh together. jungkook who knoes exactly how you like your ramen and makes it up before bringing it to you with a grin on his face.

#bts #bts x reader #bts headcanons #bts idol au #boyrfriend bts #fluff #bluemari23

[icallhimjoey]

If tomorrow is the end of the world, one of the last things I wanna do is reading a oneshot of Joe and Hazel because I miss that little bitch a lot. Thank you in advance.

so, i vowed to never write baby hazel again, and yet, here we are... you're welcome Wordcount: 1.3K

--- Great Mum, Great Team

"What a terrible development," you said aghast though you were smiling, apples in your cheeks round and blushing. You were stood in the doorway to Hazel's bedroom, amazed at what you were looking at.

"I cannot believe my eyes!"

Joe sat on the carpet next to Hazel who was trying her very best to put on her mary jane's correctly, right shoe on right foot, left shoe on left foot.

Joe fully ignored you, eyes trained on Hazel's feet, just like hers were.

She struggled with the straps, tiny fingers trying to sort her toes out and not let her socks get in the way. You saw the tip of her tongue peek out in concentration, and saw how Joe, for whatever reason, copied it.

Your heart was overflowing with proud love for her as you saw her put real effort in, eyes flitting up to Joe for encouragement. It swelled your chest, pained it wonderfully.

"Nearly there. Yep, you got it." Joe spoke softly, not lending a hand, which really impressed you. You had a way of taking over, wanting to help out and just get the task done.

This was better parenting, what you were looking at.

Hazel's left heel slipped into the shoe and she immediately moved to stand up, grabbing onto a hand that Joe held out for stability.

"Yeaaa. High five, Hazel!" Joe exclaimed, holding up a palm that got hit by two smaller ones.

She did it.

"I can't believe it." you made big eyes as you smiled at her when Hazel skipped closer, telling you all about how she put her shoes on all by herself because she was a big girl now.

Something you'd been trying to convince her of for weeks.

"See, didn't I tell you?"

It seemed like she thought it was all way too far-fetched when you told her she was old enough to put her shoes on by herself, though.

The standard reaction you'd get was, "Can you please help me, mummy? I can't do it by myself." and you'd try. You'd really try. You'd tell her things like, no babe, I know you can do it, if you don't, you'll have to go outside without any shoes on and your socks will get all wet, and that doesn't sound very nice, does it?

But you'd grow impatient.

It would just take too long.

"She's going to need a big girl bed soon, too, don't you Hazel?" Joe said, getting up himself now too. Hazel ignored the both of you as she skipped past you, on her way to the living room where the TV was still playing one of her shows.

You raised your eyebrows and huffed a laugh as you watched her disappear down the hall.

"I swear she thinks she's a teenager." Joe mused, stepping closer and letting his hand fall to your waist.

"Yea, a teenager who only listens to you, it seems."

"Well," Joe leant closer for a quick peck to your lips. "Stop being such a push-over then."

Joe expected you to drop your jaw, to frown deep, and to shove at him, because he was clearly only joking.

But instead you sighed and quietly said "Yea, I know." much more sorrowful than he ever wanted to hear you.

You thought maybe it was your voice. You didn't think you sounded very authoritative, that you didn't tend to make demands very well.

Hazel always poked right through your demands. Didn't take them seriously like you wanted her to.

"Hey," Joe whispered worriedly, forcing eye-contact before saying, "You know you're not a push-over, right? I was only joking."

You smile at his gentleness. At the instant care he's got ready for you.

"No, I am. It's okay. I shouldn't have made such a headstrong child, it's my own fault." you tried your hand at humour, and Joe nearly bought it.

You could hear how Hazel opened a cabinet in your living room, followed by the sounds of the box with wooden blocks being dragged out. Hazel didn't really have time to play right now, Joe had just gotten her to put her shoes on for a short trip to the market. You didn't really need anything, but it was nice to get out of the house and tire Hazel out a bit.

"Baby," you called out to her, leaning away from Joe a little as to not shout right into his ear, and were about to tell your daughter to put the blocks back. But then Joe pulled you in close and pressed his nose into your cheek, softly saying, "No, let her. We're not in a hurry, are we?"

You realised just then that you weren't, and, to Joe's relief, finally swung arms around his neck to hug him back.

Through kisses to your cheek, Joe murmured, "You realise that only headstrong girls can make headstrong girls, don't you?"

You couldn't help smiling as you closed your eyes, relishing in this little moment of affection Joe created.

"You have no idea..." you started, humour in your tone. "How long I struggled to get her to put on her shoes the other day. And guess how that whole altercation ended?"

Joe kept his face stuck to yours, not moving away in between kisses, just making noises with his lips against your cheek.

"Who ended putting the shoes on?"

"Was it you?" Joe spoke out of the sides of his mouth, all hot air against your skin, unintentionally raspberrying you as he did.

"It was me." you confirmed, and you let a laugh escape in a huff through your nose.

"Hmm," Joe mused, moving to press his forehead against yours. "Just means you're nurturing. Caring. So sweet, and kind."

You got a kiss pressed to your lips.

"Yea, well... would just be nice if she listened to me like she listens to... well, literally anyone else. Not to, you know–"

You didn't want Joe to think he fell into that category. He very much wasn't literally anyone else to Hazel.

"I know." Joe understood.

"She– you definitely are dad, you–"

"I know. I was trying to compliment you, just accept it. You're a great mum." Joe shut you up, pressed more kisses to your mouth and let his arms wrap tighter.

You stood in Hazel's bedroom's doorway and let yourself drown in Joe's fondness for you. Joe showed it all the time, but there weren't many moments where you stopped everything you had going on to fully accept it for a moment.

And Joe lived for these moments.

It was only short-lived though. It always was.

From the living room you heard a crash of block, followed by a silence that then got broken by beginning cries from Hazel.

They quickly grew in volume.

You were about to pull away from Joe, already mentally picking Hazel up from the floor to hug close to your chest. But Joe held you and said, "Wait..." as he turned his ear towards the living room, listening. Waiting.

It just took a second longer for Hazel to start to cry out for her mum, and a smile spread across Joe's face.

"See? Mum. She needs you. No way that she was going to call out for anyone else. It's why we make such a great team."

You rolled your eyes as Joe made his point, finally losing his tight grip so you could make your way over.

Joe followed and watched as you bent over to pick up a crying Hazel who was holding a small hand to her head next to a big pile of wooden blocks. It was obvious a tower had fallen over and she'd gotten hurt in the process.

You shushed her and swayed as you comforted her, asking her if she'd hurt her head, if it was the blocks that got her.

Hazel's soft whimpers confirming that it had been the wooden blocks made Joe pout at her sad little voice.

When you turned to look at him, Joe's face smoothed out.

"Great mum." he mouthed, and you scrunched up your nose in response.

"Great team." you mouthed back.

---

The Taglisted

@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @bylermaxmayfield, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson, @choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn, @dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma77645, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee, @figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4, @hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke, @lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @miserybeans, @munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories, @phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn628, @sidthedollface2, @songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73, @werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo

taglist currently full, sorry

#joseph quinn #joe quinn #joseph quinn x you #joe quinn x you #joseph quinn x reader #joe quinn x reader #joe quinn fanfic #joe quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn fanfic #joseph quinn fanfiction #icallhimjoey #baby hazel #hazel

[hamliet]

thoughts on how oshi no ko has portrayed what happened to hikaru (thus far) and any ideas for what his motives/role in the story is?

Honestly? I think it's doing a pretty good job of portraying it. TW for discussions of childhood sexual abuse below.

When it's first introduced to us that Hikaru was raped by the adult actress, Aqua doesn't have much reaction. On an intellectual level, he gets it, but on an emotional level in terms of what this means for Hikaru, for his development and for his pain, he doesn't get it at all. It's only when we get to Akane's expressed horror ("that's sick!") that we get an actual reaction.

The previous chapter was honestly acting and a flashback as it actually happened, and I appreciated that they showed it as violent.

That's something so often missing from stories of older women who rape younger boys (see Mary Kay Letourneau). It's not a love story. He's not lucky. It's violence.

Like, I spoke about this with a friend after the chapter, but the wiki literally says he was "implied to have been raped." Implied? He was ELEVEN.

I don't think the wiki writers are intentionally being obtuse or dismissive, but there is a subconscious way in which a lot of the world, across cultures, reacts to female predators of young boys in a way that is incongruent with how we react to men who prey on young girls. And to be fair, the latter is a far more prevalent issue but still.

So anyways, I was grateful the final panel of the flashback showed Hikaru being dragged, violently, away from a girl his own age whom he likes by an older woman who won't even introduce his son as his son. Anything Hikaru has, he cannot have.

I've written about Hikaru before, but yeah, he's a scary serial killer at this point who is likely going to target Ruby and/or Kana. He's a final antagonist, obviously, and his past abuses don't excuse him. He's somewhat modeled after Lucifer, and not the Hazbin Hotel version.

But I don't think Aqua's final challenge is stopping Hikaru.

Aqua playing Hikaru in these scenes is challenging him to do what playing Ai has provoked Ruby to do: to empathize and further understand their parents. But, the problem is that Aqua can relate to Hikaru's anger and hatred already.

Again, as I wrote previously, Aqua already is very much like Hikaru (albeit at a far earlier stage): trying to reenact and kill the perceived causes of his trauma and not able to see that he's not going to be happy with such an ending because you can't kill your way to peace.

What Aqua actually needs to do is to come to understand Ai. Ruby, imo, is the one who will come to understand Hikaru, and probably forgive him (not excuse, but this is very likely where it's going).

Ai seemed to, after all. She reached out to Hikaru's proxy (the stalker) and definitely recognized the white roses and knew who had sent him.

Yet she still reached out to her stalker as a human being and empathized with him after he had stabbed her.

If it had been Hikaru standing there himself, she would have done the same.

And lest we think this is solely an example of her toxic wanting-to-please-people trait taking control, this was also the moment--the only moment in Ai's life--where she was finally able to express herself without a lie. It can be both an indictment of the entertainment industry prioritizing pleasing others over your own life and pain and Ai's moment of triumph even amidst tragedy.

Hence again why Aqua's challenge is to understand his mother, not to kill his father as justice for her. He needs to recognize her love for him as her son. She wanted him to live. She wanted him to love. She didn't want him to obsess over her in death.

Ruby, on the other hand, needs to understand Hikaru... and Aqua. Thus far, while she's had the best growth of everyone in this entire series, she is still idolizing Sensei and Aqua thereby.

She needs to see him as a person just as Aqua needs to see Ai as a person. Seeing Hikaru's anger and pain and seeing Aqua's go hand in hand for Ruby (again, not a coincidence Aqua is playing young Hikaru in the movie).

As for where Hikaru goes from there, I don't know. He might end his own life like the stalker proxy did, but I think the fact that that's already happened makes it less likely. He might find new life even if like, in prison, or he might die sacrificing himself for his kids. It's too early to make those exact predictions... but I think Ruby understanding him and empathizing is key.

#ask hamliet #oshi no ko #onk meta #oshi no ko meta #hoshino ai #kamiki hikaru #hoshino ruby #hoshino aqua #oshi no ko theory #onk theory #tw

[possibilistfanfiction]

I love your butch!Bea AU, so maybe something where Ava is just a silly little guy and Bea is just so done with Avas tomfoolery

‘do you have to be so…’

you grin. ’so what, bea?’

‘it’s just not going to work,’ she says, utterly worn down. it’s fun, though, to be honest, making her huff and roll her eyes and laugh at your antics with no stakes involved.

‘well, how do you know?’

you watch with a fair amount of delight when she goes through, quite passionately, a list of everything known about the halo and its healing capabilities, its protective nature over you and the ones you care for. she’s in a soft, big hoodie and blue socks that are wearing out at the heels — her favorites, so she’s reluctant to part with them, you think — curled up on the edge of the comfortable couch in your living room, a pillow in her lap. she’d gone to the barber yesterday, as she does every three weeks like clockwork now, and her fade is as neat as you’ve ever seen it, the short top, an inch long, perfect for you to run your fingers through, as far as you’re concerned, messy from sleep. her glasses are a little smudged and she’s languishing with her cup of coffee so, even though she could kill a man in less than a second and has been into triathlons (terrible) lately — you are not intimidated or deterred by her in the slightest.

there’s a whoosh of sulfur and then mary and lilith are popping into your house, effectively stopping beatrice’s laundry list of reasons your plan will never work.

‘what’s he trying to do now?’ mary says, headed to the kitchen while lilith settles into her favorite reading chair, seemingly disengaged but you know she’s listening.

beatrice looks pointedly at you. 

‘i’m feeling like doing something impulsive,’ you announce.

‘you? impulsive?’ lilith scoffs — a point for you, though, because she was paying attention. ‘who would’ve thought?’

‘whatever,’ you say, no bite in it. ‘i thought it would be fun to get a piercing, but beatrice is claiming i can’t.’

‘you want to pierce your —‘

she turns red without even saying it. ‘nipples,’ you finish for her, a grin on your face.

‘never mind,’ mary says, walking over to lilith with two cups of coffee. ‘i can’t listen to this. beatrice, text me,’ and then they’re gone.

‘did they just abscond with our mugs?’ 

beatrice sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. ‘what’s this really about?’

‘uh, it would be hot, i think. obviously.’ you roll your eyes. ‘and, like, everyone normal can do all kinds of impulsive shit that i can’t. what if i just really wanted to, like, skydive? or get a face tattoo?’

‘ava,’ she says, undeterred and a little weary. ‘what’s wrong?’

you swallow, the question hitting you square in the chest in a way you didn’t expect. it’s something, to be so seen and understood by someone. ‘nothing is wrong, really, i guess. i don’t know.’ 

she reaches for your hand and you sit next to her, lace your fingers together.

‘i just — with everything going on with my back, i guess i just feel, like…’ 

‘a loss of control?’ she asks, patiently after you’d been quiet for a while. 

you feel yourself let out an honest-to-god whine before you can stop it.

she smiles, a little sad and a little determined — she’s been waiting for this, you’re pretty sure, which is equal parts sweet and annoying. ‘i have an idea that i think might work better than nipple piercings to help you feel better. we can leave tonight even, if you want.’

you perk up and her smile blooms even further. ‘while i do definitely want to hear your idea of impulsivity, i just also need you to know that nipple piercings would be hot.’

she really does consider it. ‘perhaps,’ she offers.

‘i’ll take that as a yes,’ you say. ‘tell me about your idea.’

she sits up a little straighter and explains, hesitant enough at first to gauge your reaction, that she’s been researching adaptive ski and snowboarding programs. 

‘the alps?’ you ask, immediately a little teary.

‘if you’d like.’ she picks at her nail for a moment. ‘i’ve found ones closer to here as well, so wherever you’d like to go, we can go. just say the word.’

‘you really mean that?’

‘of course i do,’ she says, so sure, so steadfast. ‘and, plus, you know i’ll enjoy myself too.’

‘ah, yes, with your double black diamonds. insane.’

‘well, and the aprés ski with you.’

you grin and kiss her cheek. ‘as long as you promise to dance with me.’

‘i’ll do anything you want to make you happy, ava,’ she says, and it hits you in the chest that she means it. she means it, even though you’re mostly full of nonsense half the time, and you like to play pranks on her, and sometimes you get stoned and pester her to watch grace and frankie with you even though she’d been trying to read. she loves you through it all, the worst days, and you love her the same: when her hands shake; when she’s frustrated; when she worries so much about decisions she’s immobilized; when she’s too strict, even now. partnership, you’ve realized, is a practice.

‘switzerland, then?’

she smiles and kisses you. ‘i’ll book everything now.’

‘you have a spreadsheet, don’t you?’

‘of course,’ she says, as if there couldn’t be any other option. you laugh and she pulls it up on her laptop — there really are tabs on the sheet for at least six different programs that vary geographically and by difficulty level, and she’s also mapped out places to stay and restaurants you might enjoy, as well as other local attractions. 

‘this is so extra,’ you tell her, your voice a little shaky and the glance out the side of her eyes telling you, without words, she’s onto you. but it doesn’t matter: she gets everything all set up for tomorrow morning, and it’s there: love greater than this world, laid out in confirmation emails and conditionally formatted columns. ‘maybe we can visit jillian after,’ you say, the alternative being bursting into tears.

beatrice hums, never opposed to the idea of a trip to spain.

‘she could figure out how to pierce my nipples,’ you say, and beatrice groans. it’s the little victories.

#avatrice fanfic #wn fic #wn #avatrice #ava rly is just a silly little guy but honestly i get it #idk what i'd do without impulsive tattoos... girl i understand lol #butch bea 🥺🫡

[haggishlyhagging]

Fortunately, Susan knew a brainstorming technique called "think and listen." Months later when I was explaining to Mary Daly how "think and listen" worked, she told me that Nelle Morton had described the same process in her 1972 essay, "The Rising Woman Consciousness in a Male Language Structure," only calling it instead, "hearing into speech," or "hearing into being." Finding "hearing into being" a much more felicitous description of what happens in this process, I immediately adopted that name for it.

The process itself is very simple—feminists will recognize it as having some of the best characteristics of consciousness raising (CR) as it was done early in the movement: no interruption or evaluation is allowed. With time and use I came to appreciate the very complex genius of this process. As a brainstorming measure, it has no peer, and it is the perfect mode for addressing questions such as those I posed to the women who were to meet in San Jose.

It works best in a group of three that has an hour and a half at its disposal. Everyone in the group has equal time to talk—in this case, a half hour each—uninterrupted and with out evaluation. This is a revolutionary experience for some women. Being seriously and completely listened to, being genuinely heard, hardly ever happens to women in ordinary everyday life. Many women cry the first time they try this process. Their being so avidly heard in the present causes them to realize how deeply they have been wounded by being ignored and disregarded, shut up, talked over, and found inconsequential or amusing during most of their past lives.

It is also often the first time women have ever listened to somebody else for a half hour or so without responding, without murmuring, "Oh yeah?," "I see," "Um hum," "I know how you feel," at appropriate intervals. Or laughing, or making sympathetic noises. It is often the first time they have ever listened to somebody else without allowing their facial expressions to communicate understanding, puzzlement, disagreement, or a host of other reactions. It is not easy for women to learn not to respond. We are thoroughly conditioned to respond. We always respond. That is one of our roles in patriarchy—to be the responders, the chorus. Men talk, and we nod and say breathlessly, "Then what happened?" or "Oh, yes, I'd love to hear about your childhood rock collection!" Our children have legitimate needs for our attention. They need to have us laugh when they're witty or cluck with dismay when they tell us their woes. Our faces are infinitely plastic: we are required to register admiration, servility, sympathy, concern, sorrow, and understanding all day long every day. We almost cannot not respond by this time in our lives. We almost cannot allow somebody to set forth upon this quest for their own ideas in our presence without our solicitous questions and reassurances, our reactions stamped clearly on our visages, our oohings and aahings—we are such active listeners. When we first try to listen passively to others, some of us feel like traitors; we feel as if we're doing something illegal, as if we might be arrested for it any moment.

-Sonia Johnson, Going Out of Our Minds: The Metaphysics of Liberation

#sonia johnson #brainstorming techniques #female socialization #consciousness raising #feminist consciousness #passive listening

[bethanydelleman]

Online Discourse, Redemption Arcs, and Jane Austen

There is a story in the Bible where Jesus is brought a woman who has cheated on her spouse. The officials ask Jesus what to do, he knows they are trying to trick him into breaking the law with mercy, so he says, "Go ahead, throw rocks at her until she dies, that's the law, BUT whoever has never done anything wrong throws the first stone." Eventually everyone leaves and Jesus forgives the woman.

This post I shared a while ago really makes me think of that story, because online commentary of characters seems to so often break into two groups:

People so unforgiving, so unwilling to allow a single misstep in a character that they would start throwing stones immediately

People who will twist themselves into knots to prove that everything the character did was justified (and since we have zero backstory for the unnamed woman in this story, it would be easy to give her a sympathetic one. She did it because of trauma!)

Let's apply this to Emma Woodhouse. At Box Hill, she mildly insults an older woman, it is a poorly timed and placed joke:

“Oh! very well,” exclaimed Miss Bates, “then I need not be uneasy. ‘Three things very dull indeed.’ That will just do for me, you know. I shall be sure to say three dull things as soon as ever I open my mouth, shan’t I? (looking round with the most good-humoured dependence on every body’s assent)—Do not you all think I shall?” Emma could not resist. “Ah! ma’am, but there may be a difficulty. Pardon me—but you will be limited as to number—only three at once.”

There are basically two reactions to this insult: BURN EMMA AT THE STAKE and Eh, not that bad. Now I think with this particular insult, it really wasn't that bad and we are told about the surrounding extenuating circumstances that caused Emma to slip up. However, I'm probably wrong because Emma does feel guilty and she does make amends. While she does not directly apologize, it's clear in the novel that what she did was a relationship repair.

What makes me feel like a crazy person is how many people throw first stones! How many people are SHOCKED by what Emma said and they could NEVER imagine insulting Miss Bates in such a cruel way! Get over yourself! I feel fairly certain that every human being on earth over 25 had insulted someone to the same level as Emma has insulted Miss Bates. That doesn't mean it is excusable, Emma should apologize and so should we, but I'm left amazed by how many people feel blameless in the face of this extremely human and relatable error.

And yes, it makes me wonder about forgiveness in their real lives. There are some things that I believe could be hard and fast "never forgive" rules, like your SO should never hit you, but people make mistakes. We should have room for forgiveness, we should understand circumstances. People get tired and sick and angry and overwhelmed and sometimes they screw up. It makes me wonder if this is an online persona effect, where we never show our negative sides, or is this a true opinion. Do people forget their own mistakes?

There also seems to be this idea that once someone has done something once, it's already a pattern even if the novel is full of counter-evidence. Emma is very polite throughout the novel, she endures people that annoy her a lot, she is endlessly accommodating with her father, but a single insult to Miss Bates and people start retroactively making her worse. When she visited that poor family she must have been insulting them! (Nope) Suddenly she becomes a villain through and through, instead of a normal girl who made a few mistakes.

That's not even getting into the real "villains" of Austen's works. The amount of people who tell me that Lydia (16), Henry Crawford (probably 24), Mary Crawford (22-24), Willoughby (25), and so on and so fourth ARE INCAPABLE OF CHANGE and will never improve. Like excuse me? Have you not changed and improved since you were 16-25? How early do you give up on people? Do you really think a young adult is fully formed?

Is this how you think of people in the real world too?

#redemption #jane austen #mostly about emma #emma woodhouse #emma #It terrifies me the lack of forgiveness and understanding that I see online #And it makes me wonder what happened to the concept of forgiveness.

[fillingthescrapbook]

Let's Talk About: Burrow's End and the First Stoats

Hi, invasive investigators!

And speaking of invasive--oof! That ending! But first: What an episode!

My MVP this episode is Brennan Lee Mulligan and his decision to weaponize kindness even when it could backfire majorly. Amazing man.

But I also want to give major props to all the planning Aabria Iyengar has done for this season. The stakes for the stoats would not be this severe had she not mapped the roads that the art department could then pave for the players to take. This was a massive ordeal, and I cannot believe there are three more episodes after this because this felt like finale-levels of heavy.

Guys, one stoat died at the start of the episode. Immediately followed by another one. My heart stopped for far longer than it should have. Honestly, when Aabria said "I'll certainly try!" to Izzy Roland's "Kill them all--" I didn't realize the viewers weren't safe as well.

I mean, she yeeted a player off the table! In the middle of the episode! That is crazy! And then when Sybill was brought in? My thoughts were: "oh no." "Oh no!" "NOOOOOO!!!" and "AABRIA, YOU'RE TRYING TOO HARD TO KILL THE STOATS! NOOOOOO!!!!"

Oh, and I'm not gonna forget: "A WOLF?!", "The flesh easily gives way?! Aabria?!", and "EVOLVE?!"

That was absolutely narsty. And another thing that was narsty? SILENCE. Holy rabbits! Which is something Silence cannot eat--because THEY DO NOT HAVE A JAW. AABRIA.

And then the Natural 1s came rolling in. When Izzy and Siobhan Thompson rolled their twin 1s? Oh. My. Goodness. It was funny when they were rolling against Jasper--who rolled a four and elicited thunderous cheers. But in the middle of a battle? When they are fighting for their lives? Izzy's Lila was down to 2 hit points at one point. And the battle was still far from over at the time!

My goodness. And the thing is, this is a streaming show. I could absolutely pause and take a minute to take a breath. But I didn't. Because the tension is high. And I was already breathing too fast. So I just continued to watch with my eyes growing wider and wider.

And, look: Sybill has a point. What is the plan after this battle? Like, granted, asking in the middle of the battle was not the best time--but she's still right. I can't wait to find out what the answer is next week. Along with what's going on with Aabria's other bombshell. Because, in the words of Rashawn Scott to one Brennan Lee Mulligan, "you're such a secretive bitch!" To which I add, "Tell 'im, Rashawn!"

Stray thoughts time:

I understand that they need to have a teaser at the end of the episodes, but I truly wish we didn't see the second map last week. Because I feel like our reactions would've been just as visceral as the players when Aabria said "now bring in the other map--" had we not known that it was coming.

I've said it once, and I'll say it again: Tula is fucking scary.

The Wolf of Theseus was a fun pun.

Director Dictator Dude feels like a game akin to Fuck Mary Kill.

This is the first time I felt really bogged down by 5e's combat mechanics. No shade to Aabria or the players. I understand that they're going to do what needs to be done because everyone wants to survive. This is completely a system fault for me.

Now let's get to the screencaps:

Oh, and one more thing:

"You stood here for generations... Was that on four legs or two?" Tula asked as she looked down at the downed First Stoat. "The humans are already here."

Chills.

#dimension 20 #burrow's end #d20 spoilers #aabria iyengar #brennan lee mulligan #siobhan thompson #rashawn scott #jasper william cartwright #erika ishii #izzy roland